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vashtijoy · 9 months

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"why not join me instead?" akechi's "invitation" in conf 7

People come and go on whether this question of Akechi's is genuine or not. Opinions run the gamut from "I hate him for trying to take you away from your friends" to "Akechi wants Joker to be his accomplice".

Myself, I don't think Akechi means this as a serious question, for a number of reasons. I think this question is rhetorical.

Quick summary:

Conf 7 illustrates the similarity between Joker and Akechi, and that they're both committed to the showdown between them;

Rather than being an invitation, Akechi's question again illustrates that parallel—that neither of them will give up the things that matter to them to join the other, as Joker has asked him to do;

"I'll think about it" does not count towards the third awakening—and I can prove it. Rather, Akechi can't conceive that Joker would ever abandon his friends, and uses it as an outrageous example of something Joker would never do;

Joker's loyalty not only to his principles but to his friends is something Akechi values so much that he won't let Joker sacrifice it;

Akechi is not so much offering Joker a way out in conf 7 (there is no way out) as he's confirming for his own sake that Joker is still in the game. Is this still a battle between rivals, or is it an execution?

Let's take a look.

what is akechi really asking?

[long post is long]

Look at this line. Look at the question he's posing:

Akechi いっそ君がこっちに来るってのは?⋯今の仲間を捨ててさ。 isso kimi ga kocchi ni kuru tte no wa?... ima no nakama o sutete sa Why not join me instead...? All you'd have to do is abandon the teammates you have now.

It's very easy to focus on the first half of this question and miss the second. But that second half is the important part, the sting in the tail. The Japanese is a great example of wa building suspense: "Instead, what if you come over to my side, (AND THEN WHAT, AKECHI???????)"

The sentence is left hanging, with the weight of it unspoken (since wa emphasises what comes after it); Akechi is obviously not done speaking. And indeed, when he continues, it's a doozy:

"though, of course, you'd have to dump the friends you have now." (Yes, I think "friends" is often a much better translation of nakama than "teammates", fight me; it's even often translated as "friend" in P5 itself, or indeed, awkwardly, as "teammates and friends".)

Akechi is using the same verb, suteru, that you use for tossing something in the trash; the parallel meaning, "ending a relationship", exists in Japanese too.

Ryuji, Morgana, Ann, Yusuke, Makoto, Futaba, Haru, everything you've all gone through together and everything you've been—Akechi is suggesting you toss them aside like garbage. For him.

Now, I think part of Akechi would very much like Joker to do that. But he also knows better than to expect it. Because he knows Joker so much better than that.

Akechi has seen firsthand how loyal Joker is to his friends—remember on 1/2 how he says he investigated them all? He's seen some of the things Joker will do for them. He expects that blind faith to lead Joker to his death, much as Yaldabaoth does. But he also respects it.

This boy who's never had a friend, who's convinced himself the whole idea is stupid, is still drawn to the loyalty he sees in Joker. Even as he's preparing his own ultimate betrayal, Akechi recognises Joker's commitment to others. He understands treachery is bad, even though he himself is a traitor—just as he understands that murder is bad, and that doesn't stop him, either.

This question of whether or not Joker will betray his friends (and Akechi specifically) comes back on 2/2, of course—and in force.

so why does he ask

Akechi is not proposing that the two of them run off together. He's not asking to see what Joker will say. He doesn't impulsively make the invitation, and then run away when Joker says yes. He is, in fact, not even asking. He poses the idea of Joker abandoning all his friends as a counterexample. It's supposed to be something Joker would never consider, something he will find morally repugnant.

Which is why, if Joker says yes, Akechi is shocked, and essentially tells Joker not to make such stupid spur-of-the-moment decisions. Akechi is making a rhetorical point about what Joker is asking of him.

Remember Joker's statement that leads into Akechi's question:

Yeah. Joker either suggests that Akechi should give up everything he's doing and everything he believes in (even as Akechi confabulates about what those things really are), or he suggests, with the top option, that he's already done it.

And in return, Akechi says that Joker should join him... and throw away his friends and everything he's working for and everything he believes in, of course.

It's the second response to his question, where Joker turns him down flat, that makes it most obvious that this was what Akechi meant:

Joker それは無理だ sore wa muri da I'm not doing that. No way in hell. Akechi だろうね。 darou ne I thought as much. Akechi 分かるだろ、誰だって今の立場を簡単に捨てられやしないんだよ wakaru daro, dare datte ima no tachiba o kantan ni suterare yashinai n da yo I'm sure you understand. We all have our parts to play, and we can't simply leave those behind.

See what he's saying? ima no tachiba o kantan ni suterare yashinai—"we absolutely must not lightly set aside the positions we hold now".

Incidentally, yes, that's that same verb suteru that he used before, for casting aside or throwing away. Akechi is drawing a parallel between Joker's friends and his own goals—between the things each of them holds most dear, which neither of them will sacrifice, even to save the other. (Assuming you think Akechi would even be down to save Joker—but I do think conf 7 suggests that at this point, he might not be opposed to the possibility. It's just that it doesn't exist.)

the phone call

This parallel returns in the phone call afterwards, if you again tell him that you're rivals:

It's a little hard to tell from the localisation what Akechi is getting at, so let's take a close look:

Akechi 僕らにはお互い譲れないものがあって、そのためにも負けられない。 bokura ni wa otagai yuzurenai mono ga atte, sono tame ni mo makerarenai [lit. for both of us, these are things we cannot compromise on, and because of those things we cannot suffer losing.] Neither of us can afford to lose, because we fight in service of our principles. It's the same for both of us. Neither of us can afford to lose, because of these principles we won't concede. Akechi ⋯だからこそ、もしも君が自分を曲げたりしたら絶対に赦さないよ。 ... dakara koso, moshi mo kimi ga jibun o megetari shitara zettai ni yurusanai yo [lit. that's exactly why, if you were to warp yourself [that way], I would absolutely never let such a sin (t/n: note the kanji) pass.] And that is precisely why... I cannot allow you to change. ... And that's precisely why, if you betrayed yourself that way... I couldn't allow it. Akechi だって、僕が負けたくないのは『君』なんだから。 datte, boku ga maketakunai no wa "kimi" nan da kara [lit. it's you as you are now who I do not want to lose to.] As you are now, as you think now... I cannot allow you to win over me. The person you are now, with those principles, and that determination—that's the one I won't ever allow to beat me.

Here's my attempt at a translation again, so you can see it all together:

Akechi: It's the same for both of us. Neither of us can afford to lose, because of these things we won't concede. Akechi: ...And that's precisely why, if you betrayed yourself that way... I couldn't allow it. Akechi: The person you are now, with those principles, and that determination—that's the one I won't ever allow to beat me.

It turns out that this phone conversation, that was originally quite mystical-sounding and hard to follow (what were you trying to say, Akechi?) is quite straightforward. It ties into to his original question. "Will I join you, Joker? Well, what if you join me instead? Just throw away all your little friends for my sake? Of course you won't—because we're the same. Both of us have things we can't give up, no matter what—and if you tried to do that, I wouldn't let you, because I value you as you are...."

This parallel between the two of them is what conf 7 is about, from the text message that opens it to the phone call that concludes it:

It's the same thing again: neither of you can afford to lose, because you're fighting for your principles. The billiard table is the stage for this wider discussion.

The billiard scene, of course, is interesting for another reason—Akechi is giving Joker a chance to back out; he's testing his commitment, and perhaps hinting that he never intended to be quite where he is, either. He states at the outset that he's being indirect, that what he's saying is a metaphor—and then closes that metaphor with a very direct question: "Do you still intend to play this game?"

Akechi それでも君は、このゲームを降りる気はないの? sore demo kimi wa, kono geemu o oriru ki wa nai no? Even then... do you still intend to play this game? But despite all of that, you still won't fold, will you?

The Japanese is even more specific: Akechi asks Joker if he intends to fold—not whether he still wants to play, but whether he means to give up entirely! "This can't be what you expected, so how about it? Will you just give up? Does this mean as much to you as it does to me? Is this a game we both choose to play, or are you just a victim?"

How much of this is Akechi blowing smoke up his own ass?—casting the fact that he's about to murder the boy in front of him in a glowing, romantic light? Pretty much all of it, I'd say. He's dreamed of having a rival, someone to compete with who challenges him, but what he's got is quite a bit more than that.

Again, the rival imagery is what allows Akechi not only to accept this close relationship, but to frame it as a life-or-death contest that only one of them can win. It confirms to him that what Lavenza describes as "a truly unfair game" is actually fair. It's about making Joker's murder seem as much Joker's fault as his own.

but what happens if you say yes?

Despite all of this, you can choose to have Joker consider Akechi's "offer"—to discard Ryuji, Morgana, Ann, Yusuke, Makoto, Futaba and Haru like trash, and assist Akechi instead. It's tempting, I know.

I don't personally get the impression that Akechi likes this response, for a number of reasons. None of the three responses to his offer score confidant points, but there's something else in play: only one of these responses unlocks his third awakening.

See the F code highlighted in yellow? Only one of these three responses has it. "You're my rival" counts towards the third awakening. Rejecting him, with "I'm not doing that", does not—but more to the point, offering to be with him, with "I'll think about it", also does not!

The issue is confused because a number of us have taken option 1 (or indeed option 2, like me) and still got the third awakening on 2/2. It seems like you need some of the flagged responses, not all of them. But it remains the case that "I'll think about it" does not make Akechi more likely to have his third awakening.

What happens if you take this option?

Joker 考えておく kangaete oku I'll think about it. Akechi へえ、考えてはくれるんだ? hee, kangaete wa kureru n da? Oh? So you'll think about it, at least? What? You mean you'll consider it? Akechi ⋯でも、そういうその場限りの情はやめた方がいい。 ...demo, sou iu sono ba kagiri no jou wa yameta hou ga ii ...But I'd advise you don't say these things without their due consideration. ... Still, it would be better if you didn't trust such fleeting sentiments. Akechi 出来もしない約束はするものじゃないよ。 deki mo shinai yakusoku wa suru mono ja nai yo You shouldn't make promises that you can't keep, anyway. Don't be the sort who promises the earth and walks away.

A few grammar points:

んだ n da on a question demands an explanation; Akechi's question could almost be rendered "Why on earth would you need/want to think about it?"

そういうその場限りの情 sou iu sono ba kagiri no jou—"sentiments that only matter here and now". Essentially, "sentiments that won't last"—or that are makeshift or ad hoc; Joker is making a stupid spur-of-the-moment decision.

yes, 出来もしない約束 deki mo shinai yakusoku translates idiomatically as "promising the earth". The point is not that Joker should not promise; the point is that he shouldn't be the sort of person who promises so much—and then doesn't follow through.

Again, this confidant is all about Akechi's expectations for Joker. It's about the weird belief he has in him, like the belief he has in Shido—that Joker has principles and friends and will stand by them, that those things are important and matter, even if they're diametrically opposed to Akechi's principles and the things he wants.

The fact that they foil each other in this way is a large part of what makes Joker such a worthy opponent for Akechi. So if Joker turns around and says, sure, Akechi, I'll dump all my friends so we can make out?

Akechi does not like that. He thinks better of him!—he loses respect if Joker offers this. Even if that little line about "promising the earth" suggests that, actually, yeah, he would quite like for the two of them to run away together—if only they lived in a world where it was possible.

what about "you're my rival"?

I've discussed this line before, but let's go into it for completeness.

Joker 明智は好敵手だ akechi wa koutekishu da You're my rival. Nah, you're my worthy opponent.

Do you see that Joker names Akechi there? He doesn't just say, "we're worthy opponents", or even "you're my worthy opponent", koutekishu da yo.

No, he picks Akechi out by name, and then tells him exactly what they are to each other. Because wa builds suspense. Akechi wa... (what?! what is he?!) koutekishu da. "I can't run away with you, because I need you to be this to me instead".

And this is the line with the F-code. This is the line that, if you choose it, will build towards Akechi's third awakening—which is centred on his trust in Joker, on the fact that Joker is worthy of that trust.

And how does Akechi respond?

He's astonished. He did not expect this at all, look:

On the left, the top screenshot where he's waiting for your answer; in the centre, the moment of shock, where he's pulled away and dropped his hand and his eyes are wide; on the right, a comparative overlay just to demonstrate that he pulled back.

smiles that aren't smiles

I have a half-assed theory that you can tell when Akechi is really smiling—because the model will smile with him. If you watch, for instance, Ryuji, the model's expressions match the sprite's almost exactly. But if you watch Akechi? Nah, not so much.

Here's an example. Akechi appears to smile quite often through conf 7—but if you glance away from the sprite and textbox to the model, the model is pokerfaced. Five smile sprites on the optimal route through conf 7, and not one of them—not even "you truly are fascinating"—matches the model:

But when you pick "You're my rival"? Suddenly the model's face springs to life:

It's obvious from everything else that this moment is of deep significance to Akechi. But this little detail with the smiles suggests we can confirm it.

and what does he say?

It doesn't take long for him to pull himself together:

Akechi 同意だね、僕らにはなれ合いより対等な関係こそふさわしい。 doui da ne, bokura ni wa nareai yori taitouna kankei koso fusawashii I agree. I think a relationship of equals suits us better than being co-conspirators, anyway...

This is another one that I find unclear in the localisation, so let's have at it.

nareai suggests an illicit or unduly-close union. It suggests "being in bed together" in the business sense—cosying up, colluding, conspiring. It suggests they're working together when they shouldn't be. Jisho uses the screamingly-outdated term "common-law marriage" (what we call "living together") as an example. Essentially, it suggests they're too close—or even co-dependent, in a way that corrupts them both.

In short? Akechi's "co-conspirators", nareai, means "accomplices"—what we might call "murder boyfriends".

taitouna kankei—literally, "an equal relationship"—is a set phrase, and we know what it means. It suggests a relationship where nobody is being cheated; where everyone gets out what they put in. Where the two of them compete on equal terms.

That's a very Akechi way to look at relationships. But it's also a relationship where nobody is in charge; nobody is dominant, and everyone has self-respect. Nobody is chasing after anyone or sacrificing unduly, as either would be if they joined the other. Everyone can be who they are and say what they want. Everyone can say no.

It's the sort of relationship Akechi very notably does not have with Shido. Is it the sort of relationship he has with Joker, when the two of them are hiding so much from each other and lying so much, and there's so much, like, murder going on? Nah. But as an aspiration, as a suggestion of the sort of relationship Akechi would like them to have, alongside everything else he's told us about how he sees the two of them—as similar, as equals and opposites, as bound by their principles, as destined to fight—it's almost touching.

and what does joker think?

Akechi ⋯たとえこの先、何があろうともだ。 ...tatoe kono saki, nani ga arou tomo da ...No matter what else may change. ...No matter what might come next. Akechi それだけの事を言ったんだから、逃げないでよ? sore dake no koto o itta n da kara, nigenaide yo? In any case, what you just said carries great weight. Remember what you decided, and don't run from it. All right? [lit. don't run away just because of what [I/you] said, all right?]

I'm not sure about this. It feels like it should be referring back to Akechi's last line—"don't get cold feet and run away just because I alluded ominously to whatever's coming next, okay?". I guess it could be referring to Joker's commitment, with "You're my rival"? IDK, I'm out on this one, so I'm inclined to give the localisation the benefit of the doubt.

But it doesn't matter. Because the significance of what Joker does next doesn't change:

He nods. Akechi spends the whole confidant hinting that something ominous is coming, and that the two of them are heading to an inevitable confrontation, and Joker nods.

I don't think this is really consistent with interpretations where Joker is a meek little sheep in the interrogation room. Joker might not have chosen this, he might not have wanted it, he might have by far preferred to avoid it. He'd happily back out if Akechi would just drop the whole thing and agree to act sane. But he's committed to it. He agrees to fight.

Remember, conf 7 takes place after Joker hears the murder phone call. He knows what Akechi is. He knows what he's planning. He knows the stakes—and he agrees to play, to face Akechi down.

To quote @nardaviel, that's no sheep. That's a full-on "Phantom Thieves win again, motherfucker" smirk. Joker played Akechi's game, with everything he had—and he played to win.

#persona 5 #p5 meta #japanese language #shuake #goro akechi #ren amamiya #almost the worst part of this is that akechi respecting joker for his loyalty tells you how little he respects himself #also! 'i'll think about it' CANNOT POSSIBLY unlock the third awakening #because the third awakening is *all about trust* and saying yes to akechi proves that you're a traitor #and that 'i won't forgive you if you betray your principles' on the phone? also 2/2. this is exactly what he does if you take the deal #also!! joker makes a third option to akechi's question with 'you're my rival' and this is what astonishes him besides the thing itself #also! (per leonawriter) the maruki deal ending is essentially the nareai relationship #where akira has all the power and akechi..? well #nobody is themself or choosing for themself #also as regards whether akechi is lying he proves himself through action #'i won't let you betray yourself' - he did that already if you tried to take the deal #ALSO? that 'megeru' for 'i won't let you depart from your principles comes back on 2/2 #as joker's 'i won't fold'#and ofc it's ALSO akechi's 'you'd fold over...' that precedes that. it was set up in conf 7 if you took the rival route #so tldr it's plausible that 2/2 is as much akechi fighting for his vision of joker as for his right to die. help???#ALSO. did you wonder why it's *awakening* akechi who comes to leblanc? the one closer to you who believes in you more?#this is exactly why. awakening akechi has faith left in you to lose. non-awakening akechi already lost that faith. BYE

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rowan-e-ravenwood · 2 months

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the fact that both trans people and midwest christian moms have an affinity for unconventional names, yet i've never once seen a single bit of overlap in those names, is so funny to me

#like. nobody would ever choose to name themself Mackienzeigh #but you'll also never have a granola mom introduce you to Juniper or Clove #idk i don't really have any point i'm trying to make. i just realized this and i think it's funny

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etchedstars · 1 year

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forgot that ppl actually have my name irl just witnessed a friend change their name to mine but spelled slightly different and my world stopped

#bitch WHY is your name the same as mine.#my chosen name not my deadname im pretty sure nobodys actively choosing to calling themself my deadname #the overdue asteroid strikes again

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mee-op · 9 months

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Facts about in-game Yuu (Twisted Wonderland):

NOTES:

This is an ongoing list and will be updated with new information. I'm not caught up w/ chap 6 and I'm not very perceptive. This list is so long because of all the people who commented/sent asks, so thank you Last but not least, some of these might be a stretch/be slightly incorrect so bare w/ me plz :] More Yuu facts [ ONE / TWO ] <- not mine

They've been good friends with Heartslabyul ever since Book 1.

They're forgiving/don't hold any bad blood with the people who've overblotted (at least on the outside).

According to the Harveston event, they can play the flute.

They don't like mentioning that they might return to their world (Deuce's Wishing Star vignette).

Many people consider them a "goody-two-shoes" (Leona, Ruggie).

A good listener.

Based on Malleus' interactions with them, Yuu talks to him a lot more off-screen as he states that he values their opinions.

Loves Grim to hell and back.

It's implied that Yuu invites Malleus over frequently enough that he visits unprompted.

They can be snarky and brutally honest when they're pushed into it.

Comes up with stupid plans that nobody believes will work but it somehow does.

They're insecure about not having any magic.

They want to be able to help their friends.

Has a sense of self-preservation.

Does not actively seek out danger (*cough* om mc *cough*).

They've cleaned up Ramshackle since living there, however, it still looks "abandoned & ancient" on the outside.

Crowley doesn't give them more money than "needed".

Silver states that Yuu is good with swords (PE Uniform).

Both Jamil and Silver seem to think that Yuu is somewhat weird/strange.

They don't know much about mushrooms (Floyd's Camp Vargas vignette).

They're very patient.

Used to be afraid of ghosts until they got to Twisted Wonderland.

They adapt to new/difficult situations quickly and calmly.

They don't complain much.

Very much so the silent type.

The audience doesn't really see anyone helping them out with their situation, so I assume they fix most of their problems themselves.

They don't have any memories of the Great Seven before coming to Twisted Wonderland.

Fluctuates between being observant and not noticing really basic stuff.

Doesn't hesitate to say cheesy things.

Keeps calm in harsh situations.

They know how to play a blowing horn (White Rabbit Event).

Good with instruments.

Not a very good singer (NRC Uniform).

It's implied that they have high stamina.

They're interested in horseback riding and wants to play soccer with Sebek (PE Uniform).

They recommend a few books to Sebek, implying that they read in their free time.

They're short in comparison to Floyd (he calls them Shrimpy).

Grim comments that they're shorter than Vil.

Crowley mumbles that Yuu looks effeminate.

They're a bit of a romantic since they seem to often ask about love stories/fairy tales (Epel & Jade chats).

They have a habit of poking, tugging, tickling and just touching people in general. This is proven through the Home Screen character interactions.

Their love language seems to be physical touch.

They get scared easily but is bad at scaring others (Halloween voice lines).

Vil notes that their uniform is baggy.

Malleus says that Yuu has gotten better at dancing (Masquerade Event).

It's implied that Yuu is good/decent at cooking since they have to make meals for both themself and Grim every day.

Yuu is decent at basketball (Ace Halloween).

Deuce remarks about a tiny piece of furniture in Ramshackle and asks if it's for Grim, meaning Yuu makes small furniture for him.

They're a good photographer.

Takes part in photography competitions (Rook Port Fest).

It's implied that Yuu carries their ghost camera everywhere because Crowley constantly makes them record events.

It's said that the game cards are actual photos that Yuu took with the ghost camera. [I don't know if this is true but a lot of people have said so]

Most, if not all the characters tell Yuu to hurry up when choosing a class, which suggests that they're indecisive.

Ace, Deuce and Cater tell Yuu to relax during classes or else they'll run out of energy.

Jack says that he got tips from Yuu while he was working in Monstro Lounge, implying that Yuu might've worked in customer service before (Book 3).

According to Grim, they have a hard time saying no to people, but when they absolutely need to-- they're very serious and a bit intimidating. "You're a real sap sometimes, you know that? Then again, when you bare your teeth it's no joke."

While they won't say no to helping others, they prefer to keep to themselves and avoid drama.

Yuu is sometimes a bit distrustful of Ace and thinks he's tricking them if he offers to do anything nice (2024 Player Birthday Greetings).

It doesn't take much to make them happy. (Deuce & Idia 2024 Player Birthday Greetings).

They became nervous when Riddle invited them to a salon for their birthday. Riddle response saying "I'll be right there with you, and will instruct you in etiquette every step of the way."

They're competitive in class-- at least when it comes to Jack (2024 Player Birthday Greetings).

They took chess lessons to try and beat Leona in a match (2024 Player Birthday Greetings).

For their birthday, Yuu asks Azul to get something that's supposedly hard for an average collector to acquire.

They're surprised when Kalim gifts them a pop-up card for their birthday.

They own a pair of fingerless gloves (gifted by Epel).

They personally invited Vil over for their birthday party and made sure to have healthy food options for him.

Not very close with Idia.

Owns a glass tumbler that reads 'Happy Birthday!' (gifted by Ortho).

Lilia gives them a CD with his screamo performances.

They were gifted so many presents on their birthday that they had trouble carrying the gifts around. (Malleus 2024 Player Birthday Greetings).

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crystallilytarot · 3 months

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Choose a coffee cup. How will your future partner show their love and jealousy

(there's a little mention of some 18+ stuff. MDNI)

Pile 1

It's like a puppy who is happy when their owner is home hehe. They are so happy when looking at you. Heart eyes, literally. They want to make your every wish come true. A genie. A little bit of a Daddy /Mommy vibe, but you will be spoiled, they want to buy you everything. Even if they act like they are grumpy and doesn't want to do something, they can't say no to you. Jewelry, a lot. Definitely gift giving is one of their love language. Trips, little vacations, a weekend get-away. And they are very patient, understanding, caring too. I heard a gentle giant. Even if they aren't so much bigger or stronger physically, but I think they are older. And a bear, but like a real life teddy bear. Altough they may look like a serious person, they are a softie at heart, at least for you, definitely. And if you have any mental or physical problems, ever, they will be so caring, protective and understanding.

If they are jealous. At first they will act like they aren't jealous. But they will be very insecure. Anxious even. I feel there will be even more gifts. Like they say in this way, that nobody else can take care of you like me. I can give you everything, don't look at others! They definitely want to have sex with you that day. Want to show you that they can take care of you in the bedroom too. A little possessiveness, nothing toxic. But if you want children, they would like to well, give it a try that night. A little like a marking kink, but it's not always like that. It can be when they give you the ring, when proposing, they see it like you belong together. They want to have you just for themself. But it's their secret kinda, they try to act like they aren't that possessive, they just can't even think about you being with someone else, it would hurt them so much.

Pile 2

A no nonsense person, they are not a player. If they like you, they will show you. I don't think they are very comfortable with speaking about all these romantic feelings, but they will show you with their actions. They are always there when you need them. If you need something, they will drive all night to you. If they are in the other side of the world, they will try to go to you as soon as possible. Maybe not a lot of speaking but a lot of messages. Good morning texts. A little sweet message. They are very giving. With their money too, and with their time, energy. Always going out of their way to help you in any way possible. You can share the responsibilities, the stress, the burdens with them. You have a partner, you don't need to do anything alone. You will feel like you belong with them. Definitely want to marry you, and I think your values will be the same too.

If they are jealous. Well, they are not really jealous. Very mature, they trust you, so it's rare that they are jealous. If they feel like something is wrong, they will try to speak about it with you or try to find a solution. Maybe try to solve it alone. Sometimes you won't even know. But they thought that you liked a shirt on someone else, they will buy something similar. Actions, so they don't show it really, they can act a little differently. If someone is bothering you, however they will talk with them. Can say a little harsher things to them too. But it's rare. I feel in this situation, they are so authorative, maybe they have a strict voice, so nobody will mess with you. I mean, you can go out with your friends, they won't be a very controlling person, but if someone don't leave you alone, well, I won't be that person.

Pile 3

You will feel safe and sound with them. Calm, and peaceful life. If you had a trauma, any bad experience, they will help you heal. You will be more confident. I think you will even have more energy, vitality. They are romantic, there will be a lot of romantic surprises, love notes, love songs. Lot of emotions here and they are not shy to tell you how much you means to them. They will compliment you a lot. Likes to go on romantic programs with you. I love you-s, cute nicknames. Tell you like every day that you are the most beautiful person in the whole universe.

If they are jealous. Oh, no. They will feel so sad, heartbroken. Don't make them jealous intentionally, because it's not something that brings spark in the relationship for them. They will feel betrayed. Even if you didn't do anything, they don't know what to do. Probably need some time alone. In the end of the day, they will realize that they can trust you, but they need to be alone a little with their thoughts, because it will bother them a lot. At first they can be grumpy, and they don't even know why. Until they think about it a little and realize that something made them jealous. Maybe they would feel bad about it, even if they weren't really mad, but probably after that, they will try to do something romantic. At least a bouquet of flower definitely.

#free tarot #pick a card #tarot #pick a pile #18+ tarot

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regular-gnome · 9 months

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Does Collector have his own mask like his siblings? Why doesn't he hear it as often as them?

they don't like the intimidation factor of masks:p

I didn't really explain it too well. It's about distancing yourself from the situation. Archivists are on a planet to perform a task and leave. They do not believe other creatures to be on the same level so they do not need to relate to them and don't want creatures to try and relate to them. Collector on the other hand wants the connection, they want to play with titans, find new friends so chooses not to distance themself. In my previous job we had to have a whole face mask and clothing so nobody could recognise us, change the stance and the way you walk. After a while you feel a bit like a different person and become indifferent to how anyone perceives you. Thats at least the idea behind the masks:p

#im sorry guys #toh #the owl house #toh archivists #the archivist #toh collectors #toh fanart #owl house #the collector #toh collector #tw blood #and also as a side note #i make a killer grandpa btw #c:i Anatomist

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dorianbrightmusic · 10 months

Text

PSA

-OCD is not a synonym for neat or preoccupied with tidiness. Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder is all about distressing intrusive thoughts and rituals (compulsions) used to combat those thoughts.

-Intrusive thoughts are not synonymous with silly things I want to do. They're deeply upsetting, often taboo mental apparitions. Letting them win is the last thing anyone wants, and nobody is immoral for having them. (See 'impulsive thoughts' if you need a term.)

-Anorexic is not a synonym for thin or emaciated. The majority of anorexic people have OSFED atypical anorexia – that is, their BMI is above 18.5. You cannot judge the severity of someone's illness by their appearance. (If you're worried about someone, look out more for rapid weight loss than thinness, even when it's occurring in someone in a larger body. 10kg in 10 weeks is never a good thing.)

-Eating disorders are not synonymous with just anorexia and bulimia. Anorexia is an ED, but it's nowhere near the most common. Bulimia is an ED, but again, not the most common. Together, they do not constitute the most common. The most common ED is binge-eating disorder, and the second most common is atypical anorexia, which is one of many, many OSFED categories. Those living with ARFID, pica, night-eating syndrome, rumination disorder, subthreshold BN, subthreshold BED, and orthorexia all deserve dignity, compassion, and acknowledgement. Remember: EDs are not necessarily thin, and never glamorous.

-Schizophrenic is not a synonym of all over the place, abnormal, unpredictable, dangerous, or crazy. Nor is schizoid or schizotypal. Folks with schizophrenia spectrum disorders live with hallucinations, delusions, disorganised thoughts/behaviour, and/or catatonia. They are far more likely to be victims of violence than perpetrators, and go to huge lengths to act okay even when distressed by symptoms.

-Schizophrenic is also not a synonym of multiple personalities/volatile. For the disorder involving having different facets of personality that are generally unaware of each other, see Dissociative Identity Disorder, and even then, don't assume it's a) dramatic as it is in the movies; b) evil; or c) trivial. DID is a trauma disorder.

-Delusional is not a synonym of wrong. Nor is it the same as this politician/friend is saying something I do not like/that is potentially dangerous. Delusions are false, fixed beliefs held despite evidence. And generally, folks with delusions don't tend to proselytise them. I know that certain politicians have beliefs that seem to persist in the face of evidence, but nevertheless, we don't need to stigmatise mental illness further to call out poor political/social behaviour. If you need a word for the pundit spewing potentially dangerous content, use 'dangerous' or 'wrong', but don't call them delusional.

-Bipolar is not a synonym of all over the place or fluctuating results. Bipolar disorder involves mood states that, even in the rapid cycling form, tend to last at least 3-4 days (mania) and weeks (depression). If you need a word for the weather, use 'British' instead.

-Psychotic is not a synonym of evil. Psychosis is losing touch with reality, whether it be through hallucinations or delusions. It doesn't make a person bad or violent. It's just a neurological phenomenon that may be distressing. It's also relatively common: 6-15% of people will hallucinate in their lifetime.

-ADHD is not a synonym of just quirky/scattered/forgetful/unfocussed/lazy/careless. ADHD is fundamentally a disorder of being able to choose where to direct attention, rather than of just I can't focus. If someone can't tune out the noise of the crowd, but can't prevent themself focussing on something trivial because their brain is wired that way, it's not laziness or just being quirky/scattered.

-Autistic meltdown is not a synonym of temper tantrum.

-Borderline is not a synonym of harridan.

-Narcissist is not a synonym of abuser.

-Mentally ill is not a synonym of volatile or bad person. This doesn't mean we have to make something artificially positive out of mental disorders. If there is good to be found in certain disorders, great; if there is nothing positive about living with certain others, that doesn't make you any less real or resilient than anyone else. It's okay to have complex feelings about your own disorders. It's okay to feel exhausted or frustrated by a disorder. But never should anyone have to face stigma.

#vent post but also important #ocd #intrusive thoughts #eating disorders #eds #schziophrenia #delusions #bipolar disorder #bipolar #psychosis #adhd #bpd #npd #cluster b #mental illness discourse #i want to make this for a couple of reasons:#a) i have intrusive thoughts (and possibly inserted thoughts) and they're awful #b) i've had OSFED and seeing the AN = thin stereotype is... frustrating #c) so so many people live with the other disorders on this list and don't get help and support because of stereotypes #d) so long as stereotype persists the medical system will not acknowledge the needs of its patients #e) while i don't have the right to speak over anyone with any of these disorders i can at least try to start a conversation #those of you with the above disorders: feel free to correct me if i stuffed up a detail #nt people you may interact with this post #everyone: feel free to add more to the list

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ishoulddefbedoingotherthings · 8 months

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No I can’t hold it in anymore. People who complain that Emma and Killian got boring after they got together (mainly season 5 and 6 and mainly Emma) are my biggest pet peeve.

Emma’s rough exterior was because she experienced a lifetime of trauma. She was constantly abandoned/cast aside by people she cared about. For 28 years she believed her parents gave her up, and for her entire childhood she was living in the foster system or on the streets. When she was still a literal child she was betrayed by a person she loved and was sent to prison pregnant where she sat in that trauma for eleven months without a semblance of justice. She was hardened at such a young age and as seen in the show, it manifested itself into impenetrable walls that made her closed off and snippy. Yes, she was a badass when she chopped down Regina’s apple tree and slammed that guy’s head into a steering wheel (he really deserved it). But many of her badass interactions were because of her walls that made her so closed off. She only had herself to rely on, so obviously all of the stunts she pulled looked so awesome because she only had herself and her strength that was created through years and years of trauma.

What’s cooler? A person scaling a cliff all by themself without help of any kind, or a person using ropes and a partner or many partners to achieve the same result? Many people would choose the first one. But what’s safer? The second. It may not look cooler, but there’s no doubt in my mind that the second person would feel completely safe with people to rely on. And then if you put yourself in that situation, you would choose help. Right? Well when Emma realized that she had that help (mainly in season 4/5), she damn well took that help.

“The only one who saves me is me.” That quote has Emma coolness written all over it, but her tone of voice when she says “Hook” right before just shows how surprised she was that people- that HE actually came back to save her. AGAIN, no less. In New York, she looked genuinely surprised when he said “I came back to save you” because nobody had come back for her before. Absolutely nobody.

Emma is a badass and will always be a badass, but her hesitance to trust anyone and everyone makes her appear MORE badass because she only had herself. Then, she suddenly didn’t have to rely on herself anymore when she got closer to Killian (yes, she did have her parents before, but even then the only thing on her mind was to run far away and take Henry with her because it was safer. And because it was safer, she would have less fear about being put in a situation where she had to trust other people to do something that she previously only did for herself. ‘You want something done right, you have to do it yourself’)

AND THATS NOT EVEN COUNTING THE EMOTIONAL ASPECT.

Scenes where Emma opened up in season 1-most of 3 is like finding an emotional needle in a trauma infused haystack. She only opened up because she had to, and ‘had to’ most commonly meant ‘to get her son back’. She opened up about feeling like an orphan because she needed a magical map to find her son. She told Neal she wished he was dead because she had to unlock a cage, or else her son wouldn’t have a father, not because she wanted to. She didn’t want to face all the trauma he caused her, but she had to. She opened up to Henry in season 1 about a foster family giving her up because she couldn’t deal with how he was complaining about a family that she desperately wanted. It was a necessity for her to make Henry understand that his life was not unfair. (Though that was before Regina acted like a total bitch to her).

But then when she and Killian got together, or even just got closer to each other, she was opening up to him so much and it made her both more vulnerable, but also stronger emotionally, and being able to be emotionally vulnerable IS badass and such a big step for Emma. Compared to her in season 1, season 4 Emma wouldn’t even recognize herself because look at all the people she trusts and relies on. And not just her family, this random eyeliner-wearing-hook-for-a-hand dude who thinks she’s enough purely because she’s HER. The random dude who’s first priority is HER. Emma has never had that in her entire life. She has never been put first like that, and it must’ve been so amazing for her to be put first by a person who doesn’t need to do so because they’re family, but because she’s HER and he loves HER.

Flash forward to the end of season four, she sacrificed herself to the darkness and trusts the people who love and care about her to save her. THAT IS SO BIG FOR EMMA. THAT IS SO BADASS.

And I feel like the same people who believe that Emma and Killian got boring during and after these seasons neglect to realize that it was fricking traumatic. I always imagined the darkness as something that latches on to a person’s suffering and abuses it to their own agenda: to snuff out the light. (Which is exactly what it did to Killian). Emma had that darkness inside of her for the first half of season five and we all saw the tole it took on her. I know some people don’t like how Emma’s voice changed a bit, but that’s how a person who is empty sounds. She was tired and terrified and had to rely on Killian and her family to help her, and Killian was there for her at every step of the way and he helped get rid of the voice inside of her head.

Yes, Henry has always been a rock in her life, but in that season Killian was a fortress that she could lock herself away in and feel safe and loved during a time where she was constantly reliving her suffering.

And then she loses that fortress. One minute he was standing there with the utmost support and the next he was on the floor dying and she was so terrified of losing him that she turned him into the one thing he was desperate to destroy. And then she has to live with this internal conflict of lying to him to preserve the man she loves because she knows he would hate her for doing that to him. But of course she doesn’t want to lie to him, but she doesn’t want to lose him either because she won’t know how to go on.

That changes a person, and I think because OUAT is a magical show, there’s a tendency to downplay the trauma characters go through because it’s magical and it couldn’t happen in real life. It’s difficult to put yourself in the character’s shoes because it requires a lot of imagination to do so. Emma has spent months creating a relationship with Killian. She’s opened herself up in ways that she has never done before and suddenly he’s ripped away from her emotionally because the darkness took control over him, but she was so terrified of losing him that she settled for his physical presence.

That is so fucking traumatic. And because Emma is starting to completely open up, it hurts so much more because she doesn’t have walls to protect her.

And then she has to kill him, and he dies in her arms. The person she’s grown to love and care about dies in her arms and the amount of guilt and sorrow she felt clearly crushed her as seen in the scene of her lying on the couch, holding the ring he gave her, in what was supposed to be the place where she and Killian would live together- the life she wanted so much that she turned him into a dark one to keep him with her. And dark one Killian said a lot of messed up stuff to her (let’s be honest he was self-projecting) that definitely affected her.

Then she finds out that Killian’s entire death was for nothing so she goes back to save him. And she sees the torture and pain he endured because she made him a dark one and that guilt is probably so crushing, and amplified by the fact that she dragged her entire family down here including her son to save him because she was so desperate to see him again.

But when she finally has him back, it’s realized that he can’t go back to the living. She will never get to have that life with him that she wanted and it crushed her.

Yes, at the end of it all, she gets him back in the graveyard, but all of that trauma doesn’t go away.

In no way shape or form should Emma be the same exact person she was after living through that. In no way shape or form should she be EXPECTED to be the same snappy-comeback-armor wearing-badass she used to be because of that emotional and physical trauma she went through.

She is not boring because she relies on other people, and she’s not boring because she’s showing exhaustion or being less ‘badass’ than she used to be. The girl needs a break. She needs a break from the constant bombardment of villains and curses and trauma and in those little moments when she’s alone with Killian, she gets that break and it’s seen every time she smiled and her eyes soften at him. That’s her being happy, not boring. I would so much rather have Captainswan be happy and ‘boring’ than ‘badass’ and severely traumatized because haven’t those guys been through enough?

I didn’t even get to Killian who could fill the ocean with his trauma , but honestly most of the boring comments I’ve seen are directed towards Emma and it makes me so mad because she needs to REST. So what if Killian isn’t as flirty as he was in early seasons. it’s a mask, it’s clearly been a mask since the beginning and he finally has a person who loves him because he’s him (Emma) and a family and basically a brother (David). I for one think that pirate deserves to rest after living in darkness for hundreds of years. And I think he’s been plenty flirting. Uh, pancakes???????? Let the man have a break.

But does this make anyone else mad? Is it just me? I hope it’s not me.

THEYRE LIKE MY BABIES LET THEM BE HAPPY WITHOUT COMMENTING ON THEIR LACK OF BADASSERY PLEASE

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

#once upon a time #captain swan #killian jones #emma swan #pet peeve #rant post #ouat #i love them so muuuuuch #they deserve a break #Emma swan is a badass all the time #Killian jones is a traumatized dude he needs a break #let them heal

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vendetta-if · 1 year

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Okay... Every. Single. Time. I see the hickey ask on an IF blog I follow, I feel the NEED to post this follow up:

What if very shortly after that, the ROs catch / hear the MC asking someone (or even if the MC asks THEM, depending on the context) if they have something to soothe mild allergic reactions to mosquito bites, because they got one on their neck.

So basically, how would they react when faced to the reveal it wasn't a hickey at all but a dumb mosquito bite!

Here goes out to all of you hickey anons and non-anons 🤭❤️ Also, the link to the infamous hickey ask is here for those who haven’t read it!

Ash

“Wait, wait, Ash!” They hear MC calls out to them and they stop in place. Oh, how they just want to bolt away from this nightmare, but maybe this is also a chance to just face it head-on.

“Ash, what’s wrong?” MC asks as Ash turns around to face them. Ash doesn’t really know what kind of face they’re wearing right now.

“Who was it, MC?” They ask, voice hoarse.

“Who, what?” MC asks in genuine confusion, which just irritates Ash even more.

“The one—The one who gave you… those marks!” They gesture at MC’s neck.

MC’s eyes widen. “What?! No! Nobody gave me these marks. These are goddamn mosquito bites,” MC explains as they scratch their neck. “I swear once I get my hands on those bastards…” They mutter under their breath.

Ash just stands there dumbfounded. “M—Mosquitoes?” Those are not… They glance down and just notice MC is holding a can of bug spray. Oh… Oh no… How could you think the worst of MC, Ash?

“Yeah, pesky bastards. Don’t tell me you didn’t have any in your room last night?” MC says, scanning Ash up and down for a second before concluding, “Oh, you didn’t, don’t you?”

“N—No,” Ash replies truthfully.

“Motherfuckers probably thought your blood is too hot to drink or something,” MC mumbles irritatedly. “Well, I’m gonna spray the whole penthouse now, if you don’t mind.” MC raises the can in their hand like a weapon.

“Uh… Yeah, please do that,” Ash says stupidly. “And, uh… Just forgot what I said earlier…” A surge of relief washes through their whole body, but it soon gets tainted by embarrassment.

“Aww, were you jealous?” MC smirks teasingly.

“Uh—Um…” Ash stammers. “I—I gotta go! See you later, MC!” They splutter in panic before bolting away for real this time.

Oh my God, MC is not gonna let them live this down, won’t they…

Rin

Rin decides not to embarrass themself further and chooses to just ignore MC, pretending not to see or notice them entering the room. They’re not going to lower themself to ask MC about the marks.

Honestly, they’d rather MC leave them alone for now. But of course, the opposite of what they want always happen. They groan inwardly as they see MC walking over to where they’re standing from the corner of their eye.

They steel themself for an unwanted conversation. They’re good at that.

“Hey, Rin,” MC greets them and they just grunt softly in reply. MC doesn’t even notice their curt reply, seemingly distracted by something else.

Oh, I bet their mind is still filled by whatever happened last night…

“Uh, this might be a weird question,” MC begins sheepishly as Rin just keeps staring at them unamusedly. “But, do you know any kind of salve or medicine that can help with these mosquito bites?” They ask, scratching at the marks on their neck.

Rin blinks. There’s no way that excuse would work on them. “Really?” They reply skeptically as they gesture at MC’s neck. “You’re bitten by mosquitoes in your penthouse?”

“I know right? I don’t even know how they managed to get in considering my penthouse is like… at the top floor of a skyscraper,” MC agrees, missing the point Rin is insinuating. “Probably through the elevator or the air vent or something. Anyway, Uncle Luka said he’ll personally get a professional pest extermination service to deal with that.”

Well, Rin did catch their father talking with Luka on the phone about choices of professional pest extermination services available in the city. For some reason, Luka asked their dad as if he knows anything more about it than Luka does. Maybe MC is telling the truth and it’s their paranoia and distrust running rampant once again…

Rin uncrosses their arms—when did they even cross them in the first place? “Uh… Tiger balm works wonder for bug bites,” Rin advises.

“Tiger balm, huh?” MC repeats. “Alright, I’ll just go get it at the nearest drug store. Be right back,” they say before swiftly making their way to the elevator.

Meanwhile Rin is left standing there, still processing what has just happened in the span of a few minutes.

Santana

“Hey, Santana!” MC greets them as they walk over to where Santana is standing.

Santana is already cringing inside at the potential awkwardness of the conversation. They’ll still try their best to try talk normally with MC, but it’s kinda hard with the hickeys still heavy in their mind.

“Um… Hi, MC,” they greet back cordially.

“So, how was your night? Had enough sleep?” MC asks them.

“Well, like usual,” they answer distractedly. “How about you? Seems like you had a wild night…” They gesture at the general direction of MC’s neck.

Oh my God, Santana! What the heck are you doing? Asking about the thing you wanted to avoid talking in the first place?! You idiot!

“Oh, you won’t believe this,” MC begins enthusiastically. “So, I was sleeping pretty soundly for like half the night, before my neck started to feel really itchy. I kept getting dragged out of sleep as I scratched at it. Woke up the next morning, and lo and behold, I just got frickin bitten by the most vicious mosquitoes of Elysium City,” they complain, tilting their head a bit to show them of the “hickeys” which turn out to be mosquito bites.

“Huh?” Santana remarks intelligently as they stare at the marks. Okay, now that they can see them better and closer, they do seem like bug bites instead of hickeys.

“I know right?” MC agrees, with… what? Santana is not sure because their mind is blank right now. “Don’t ask me how the mosquitoes managed to break into my penthouse, which, mind you, is located at the top of a skyscraper.”

“That… That is indeed weird,” Santana replies, chuckling in a mix of amusement and relief. It seems like their fear is unfounded after all.

MC continues their rant about the pesky mosquitoes and their plan on eradicating them from their penthouse. Santana just smiles softly as they listen to every word.

Skylar

Skylar quickly makes their way to MC before anyone else manage to make a conversation with them. MC stops in their track as they notice Skylar approaching.

“Hey, MC!” Skylar greets in faux-cheeriness.

“Oh, hey, Skylar,” MC greets back. “What’s up?”

“Well, I should be the one asking you that,” Skylar says, the grin on their face feels very strained but they hope it won’t show and that it still looks charming on the surface. “Who’s the lucky person?” They ask straight to the point, gesturing at the general area of MC’s neck.

“Certainly not me,” MC groans as they rub at their neck. “Just had one of the worst nights of the month.”

“Oh?” Skylar prompts, hopefulness crammed into that one single sound.

Inside, they’re gleeful though. It seems like whoever MC was sleeping with last night must’ve sucked balls—no possible pun intended. Well, this is their time to shine! Skylar would be more than happy to show MC how it’s really done!

“Yeah! I kept waking up at the middle of the night because these annoying mosquito bites were so damn itchy!” MC complains, scratching at their neck again.

Skylar nods before stopping. Wait, what? Mosquito bites? “What?” They ask, dumbfounded. The marks… they’re not…

MC doesn’t seem to notice Skylar’s confusion as they continue ranting, “I don’t even know how they managed to get in! My penthouse is located at the top of a fricking skyscraper!”

A sense of relief floods through Skylar, and their strained grin has shifted into a mischievous one. “Well, I know of a remedy to help with the bites.”

“Wait, really?” MC looks at them curiously. “What’s that?”

“I heard kisses can work wonder.” Skylar winks before pursing their lips and making kissy noises. “I’m always available to help, you know. Just give me a call whenever you’re ready.”

Skylar can practically see the blood surging up to MC’s cheeks. “Y—You—” they stammer. “You idiot! T—That’s not real! If you’re not going to help, then I’ll go to buy some real medicine for these bites instead!” MC harrumphs adorably, turning away to walk to the elevator.

Aww, MC is soo cute! It makes Skylar feels warm and gooey inside as they chuckle to themself. “Well, my offer will always be open! Whether you have more bug bites in the future or not!” They call out to MC’s receding back.

MC doesn’t even turn and just flips them the middle finger instead before stepping inside the elevator. Oh, they love MC.

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ptn-imagines · 2 months

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Can you do Suspect R x pre amnesia! chief? ik there's not a lot of content for her but they give such domestic married wives energy like

LOOK AT THIS. its fine if u dont accept, ther are PLENTY other ptn womens i thirst after so....

Oh, I will absolutely write for Suspect R despite her lack of content. In fact, I was hoping someone would ask!

Due to the lack of content on both her and Chief pre-amnesia, I ended up focusing more on the feelings they may have shared more than anything else, using the glimpses of Shepherd-12 we see in Shalom's interrogation as a guide. If this isn't to your satisfaction, feel free to send in another request! Praying that chapter 14 marks the return of the OG wife...

Suspect R x Pre-Amnesia!Chief

Once upon a time, her name was the one they loved the most. In a world where everyone wanted to use or betray them, she was the only one they trusted whole-heartedly. Shepherd-12 adored her.

As truths were unveiled and lies became unmasked and Shepherd-12 became more and more jaded to the world, she was the only one spared of hissing and biting. Only she could melt the icy protective layer upon the Shepherd’s heart, for only she could be trusted with it. Only she had pure intentions.

Secret trysts and rendezvous, the Shepherd was always so tense until the face of the nameless official melted away to reveal their lover, who perched on the edge of their desk like she belonged there. She did belong there. And the Shepherd abhorred the idea of belonging to anyone, anyone except for her. They would give themself over to her in a heartbeat, and they would drown in her, and it would be a sweet way to die.

They are a creature of Mania, but this Sinner is their salvation. She makes them feel human in a way that nobody and nothing else does, and they know that fate will never be kind to them so they relish these precious moments, and they love her eternally and devotedly and without regret nor restraint.

She loves them in kind for she knows this is what they need. They will never speak their thank yous aloud but she knows; how could she not? Even if the world should revile them, see them as monsters (and it did), the two of them would have each other. They need nothing else.

She holds them so close as though she attempts to meld their flesh as one. They greedily kiss her deeper, hotter, as though trying to exchange pieces of their souls with each entwined breath. She is both the untamed tempest that will inevitably drown them and the singular piece of driftwood that keeps them afloat in the storm.

Nothing else matters. Nobody else matters. Let the world burn to ash. The Shepherd would welcome it. The world is rotten to the core. So are they. Only she remains pure in an endless sea of filth. Only she is the truth among the lies.

“My dearest, your heart is becoming so black,” she whispered one night, and they didn’t know it then but this would be the final time they saw her like this. Her fingers caressed their face and they purred, leaning into the touch.

“They don’t deserve any more,” they breathed, nails digging into her back as though they were afraid they might slip through their fingers. “They can go to Hell for all I care. You’re the only thing that matters.”

She smiled at this and pulled them into another deep kiss. This one felt different, like a goodbye, but it was still filled with every ounce of passion and fire and desire and need and belonging they had come to expect. “You know it won’t end like this.”

“I know.” They detest the fact. She makes it bearable. She’s the only reason they haven’t torn the world asunder yet, because she is part of that world. “But you’ll be there, won’t you?”

She smiled. “Always. Don’t sleep for too long, or I might have to come and get you myself…”

…

Shepherd-13 always wakes from the dreams of these memories too soon, these ghosts banished with the rise of the sun over this corrupt city.

What was her name?

If they could choose anything to remember, it would be this.

#ptn #path to nowhere #ptn suspect r #path to nowhere suspect r #suspect r #ptn headcanons #path to nowhere headcanons #headcanons

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yandere-daydreams · 1 year

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Hey guess what? I'm just gonna send you a yandere monsterfucker ask because we should probably get even weirder in here!

Imagine a totally effed up, eldritch shape shifter that came out of the void one day and just saw you. Imagine the hijinks, a Monstrosity that loves you so much that it decides to BE you! It studies your mannerisms and routine and every little last detail about you so that it can finally, transform into its most favorite person in the world. Imitating your voice on the phone, quitting your job and saying a few mean comments to your friends and family to distance you, so that when it finally comes to show its true form to you and whisk you away to its realm forever, nobody will be in the way! Isn't that just neat?

tw - disturbing themes, implied non//con, manipulation, and obsessive behavior.

it really is the ultimate form of flattery, for a being so great and so powerful to carve a piece of themself away and shape it into the form of their most beloved mortal. they can't stand to be apart from you, so they make it so they never have to be - copying your gestures down to the smallest movement of your fingertips, learning your speech patterns and habits, practicing and practicing and practicing until looking at their own reflections brings on the same bubbling spark of joy they catch a glimpse of you. improving your life was always going to be child's play (most things about human life are when you can snap your fingers and change the very fabric over the universe), but they take a special joy in doing things as they think you would; submitting a formal resignation to the job that's always caused you so much stress, moving you out of that cramped apartment and into the property you've always said you'd never be able to afford, 'removing' a few of your old, worn-out friends and making room for the branches of themself they've designed especially for you to slip in. it's gratifying to put in the effort, and they want you to be able to understand what they're doing for you.

that's the form they choose to approach you in, too, when they decide it's time to reap the rewards of all they've done for you - because surely no face will set you more at ease than your own. you do panic more than they'd prefer, but that's alright, they just adore the sounds that slip past your lips when they're on top of you, all of it so breathy, all of it so strained, like you think there's anything about yourself you can keep away from them. they look forward to being able to share themself with you one day, as you've (however unintentionally) shared yourself with them, but you're not quite ready for that, yet.

until then, they'll just have to leave you in the hands of the person they love most <3

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere imagines #yandere theory #yandere monster #general

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utilitycaster · 8 months

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Fascinated by Ashton choosing to introduce themself as "Ashton of the Hishari" but also saying they wanted to mourn something they didn't know they'd lost. I mean, it makes as much sense as anything - it's not like Greymoore holds any meaning for him, probably much less so now that he does not think of himself as one of the Nobodies any more, but rather one of Bells Hells. It is an interesting choice though to claim Hishari. They are the ones who gave them that primordial essence that they are trying to tap into; but they also did this to a child who could not possibly have been able to agree to this with a full understanding of what would happen (if, to be fair, it was deliberate and not a complete accident, but that doesn't paint them in a terribly great light either).

It fits very well with what Jirana tells him though: good things were gained, good things come out of the bad, and it's more important to focus on what he has than what he lost. But I wonder what the more blunt (and possibly more aware of the situation) Evontra'vir is going to say.

(Evontra'vir being a Gau Drashari is also a really interesting twist because the Gau Drashari of Domunas were very specifically focused on keeping the titans sealed. What exactly did Efterin get? Was it actually a blessing of Evontra'vir, or was it a relic from the Shattered Teeth he claimed was that but absolutely wasn't? How did the Gau Drashari - the original ones - feel about sending the Primordials across the planes, since it was the only option but their role had been to guard what was sealed, not to destroy or eliminate it?)

#taliesin is always good at names tbh...god the fucking letter signed Percival of Vox Machina.#i have SO many lore questions #and also. ngl. i think everyone should get Tree Time. like. ashton and fcg but like. laudna and orym and imogen too.#chet and fearne don't have the same kind of grief at least not to our knowledge but. idk. i say do it anyway #critical role #critical role spoilers #ashton greymoore

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archonadeptus · 1 year

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Hi ^^ ok so I got a spark of inspo and I want to get this out before I forget, Genshin x Creator! Y/n (GN) angst thing. Idea is that Creator y/n has a nightmare where their body is almost not their own and they're forced to watch themself kill all of their beloveds, then go to pov the Genshin characters and they have to watch y/n thrashing around saying little "no.."'s and "stop.."s while the Genshin characters are trying to wake them up and stop their suffering, :insert something with ur incredible imagination:, and then they finally wake up with a gasp and tears falling down their face and they hug the nearest character (say like Tighnari or someone else you choose ❤️) and then they just sob their heart out saying "I'm sorry...." Over and over again until they get comforted, then they tell the Genshin characters (I'm leaving the character choosing to you) what the nightmare was abt and then at the end they breakout crying all over again, then one big group hug later y/n is happy (but still very sorry and regretful) and it goes to fluff cuz I can't handle having my heart shattered, with y/n being a bit more clingy. The end. And ofc you don't have to do this req but it was an idea that I got just after reading one on your other fics, anywho have a good day/night/whatever the heck and take care of yourself, imma go cry bc this idea already shattered my heart thinking abt it. 🙂

A/N: Thank you so much for your request! I appreciate it so much~♡ I absolutely love this idea, I love Angst and comfort so much!! I truly hope that this is everything you were looking for. I hope I shatter all of your hearts and mend them again at the end with all of the fluff! Enjoy, lovelies.♡

Edit A/N: I got a little excited and carried away I'm so sorry it's so long omg.

Characters: Tighnari, Kazuha, Wanderer, Xiao, Zhongli

Warnings: A lot of Angst within the first section. Main character deaths (in the form of a dream), upsetting scenes, mention of a character ending their own life. A lot of comfort at the end!~ (The Angst is just a dream!)

Control.

Sitting upon your throne carefully crafted by only the most glorious chunks of cor lapis and most vibrant of flowers always felt a little too much for you. Yes, you had embraced being the creator long ago, but it still felt a little too much. The way everybody would bow to you, some even looking a little afraid. Why in Teyvat would any of your own creations fear you? Then again, why were you even in your throne room to begin with? This was reserved for occasions where your beloved acolytes had assured you that your presence specifically on the throne was important, you just had to address Teyvat from your rightful place. As far as you knew, there were no emergencies that needed tending to and nobody had told you to come here.

"Tell me, what makes you think I adore you all?" Who said that? Wait, that's your voice echoing off the marble walls. Why… Why do you sound so angry? Why is your voice void of any love? Silence fell upon the room, the pressure of the air seeming to thicken. "I do require a reply, that was in no way rhetorical." Your eyes narrowed, deep golden eyes glaring down at five of your acolytes beneath you, bowing lowly on the floor. You weren't controlling your own voice, nor were you controlling your own body. Why is this happening? They all look so afraid.

"M-my divine." Zhongli spoke first, daring to lift his amber hues to meet your own. "You created us. Everything is made with nothing but your own hands and abilities. Do you not love what you have created?-"

"Shut it, Morax." Your voice was so heavy in the air, the floors lightly rumbling with an ever-growing rage. "I did not ask for a rant, just a simple reply. And did I hear you questioning me?" You stood rather abruptly, Zhonglis eyes meeting the floor once again. You summoned a weapon made of nothing but pure golden swirls, you placed the tip beneath Zhonglis chin and lifted his gaze upward to meet yours again. "I simply detest you. My most loyal acolyte? What a lie." Kazuha seemed to slowly lift his gentle tear filled gaze up, his soft doe eyes meeting your own.

"B-beloved, he didn't mean it in the way you think. We truly adore you… But please…" The sword you now wielded left Zhongli causing his gaze to move away to the floor again, it now lifted up Kazuha's gaze to meet your own.

"Beloved?" You spat out, glaring down at him. "And you too dare to question my judgement?" He slowly shook his head, shutting his eyes tightly to try and will away his pretty tears threatening to spill down his dusted cheeks.

"I-im sorry, your grace." A smirk painted itself on your lips before you knelt down a little before him.

"Let me tell you a little secret, my dearest wandering samurai. You know your beloved Tomo?" His eyes immediately filled with love and pain at the mention of the fallens name. "I had so much fun controlling his fate, you know. His obsession with the Musou no Hitotachi was such a good plan. Do you know why I led your beloved to death?" He was trying to muffle his own sobs with his hands pressed against his mouth. You… You led Tomo to death? "Because I grew bored of him. I didn't want to play with him anymore. But my goodness, seeing you watch him die certainly was a treat. I mean, look at what it did for your character development!" Why were you telling lies? This wasn't you, why can't you stop yourself? "Do you want to know what he was saying before your arrival? He was begging me to spare him for longer, just so he could say goodbye to you. To ensure you were okay." You scoffed at this, "He didn't trust that you were safe with me." Kazuhas sobs now escaped his lips as his broken stare met your own. "Ah, but maybe he was correct. I'm bored of you too, Kaedehara Kazuha. Tell me now, how badly do you wish to see him again?"

"N-no please… T-this isn't you. S-stop, I beg of you, I'll do anything." Rolling your eyes you stood,

"Your begging no longer amuses me, Kazuha. Do you desire to see what Tomo saw upon his death? Let me show you…" Before he could even cry out his love for you and his apologies, you preformed the divine punishment upon him. Though this time, it was all golden. His body lay before you, your other acolytes whimpering at the sight.

"Now, Xiao my darling." He seemed the calmest of them all, his eternal suffering allowing him to mask his emotions easily. That now though was boring to you, you wanted to see him break. "You're nothing but loyal to me, right?" Your hand gently cupped his cheek, thumb rubbing against his skin in soothing circles. He nodded eagerly, eyes on your own.

"Yes, your grace."

"Would you do anything I ask of you, beloved?" Once again, another gentle nod as his faze softened at your touch.

"Yes, your grace."

"Good boy." With a smile, you gave him his Jade Spear again, standing with him. "Kill Morax."

"Y-your grace?" Zhonglis head snapped up at your words before gazing at Xiao with the Jade spear he once gifted him.

"You heard me, darling. Kill him, he's a traitor. Did you hear how he questioned me? Did you hear his lack of faith?" Xiao's hands gripped harder onto the spear before his eyes met Zhonglis again.

"Child, you must." He sighed, lowering his head. "It is what our creator desires. I deserve this punishment…" Xiao raised the spear as you smiled brightly, stepping back.

"Any last words, Rex Lapis?" Zhongli knelt on his knees, gazing up at Xiao.

"It was an honour to fight beside you, to raise you, and die by your hands my Adeptus. You are my strongest warrior, and you shall always shine like gold within my memories. Even during death." Xiao shook, eyes finally filling with tears. Did he… have to do this? Did he have to kill him… n-no. There must be another way for him. Immediately he lowered his spear and fell down to the ground before your throne once you sat back upon it.

"Your grace, please. Spare him, let me die in his place"

"Oh how boring. I would have thought you'd at least inflicted some damage. Not even offering Tighnari over there as a substitute? Or Wanderer? No?" Rolling your eyes you hummed. "Very well. Put on a show for me." Xiao simply nodded, Zhongli however stood and began to rush over to Xiao.

"No!" Golden chains soon shoved him to the ground. "You cannot make him do this! This is unjust, your grace." His eyes shone as he struggled against the ever strengthening chains.

"Unjust?" You smirked, "I see now that I sit before Rex Lapis and not Zhongli. Only the God of contracts would have the will of stone to dare question his creator." He growled lowly, golden markings forming upon his skin.

"Do not lay a hand upon him." You giggled, throwing your head back in glee against your throne.

"Me? Lay a hand upon him? No, no. I think you'll find yourself quite mistaken there, Morax. For he shall kill himself." Without another word needed from you, Xiao did just as you had said. He laid there before your throne, body weak as he whined and reached for you within his final moments. At this, you simply smacked his hand away and sighed. Zhongli was screaming with rage at this point, nothing but agony filling his body. Wanderer and Tighnari simply sat there and watched it all.

"H-how could you kill off your own acolytes like this?"

"Ah look who's finally decided to join this wonderful discussion of ours~ If another word leaves your lips, I too shall end you Tighnari. I'm not interested in you right now…" Your golden eyes drifted over to wanderer. "I'm interested in him."

You knew Wanderer was panicking, all of the memories about being abandoned, tortured and broken replaying in his head. You were watching his memories and his thoughts, they made the real you scream in upset. Surely all of this wasn't happening right now?

"My dear Wanderer." His doe eyes gazed at you longingly. Ah, so this wasn't Wanderer. This was your beloved Kunikuzushi, before you got bored and put him through suffering so all of his love and loyalty would belong to you. "My darling Kuni… You love me, don't you?"

"Y-yes my divine." You smiled brightly, moving over to him and removing his hat to pat his head.

"Good boy. How will you prove your love to me, Kuni?" He scrunched his eyebrows in thought, it was almost beyond adorable.

"However you see fit. You have all of me, my Divine." You smiled brightly before humming again.

"Then perish just for me? Just like Xiao?" He simply nodded almost like he was in a trance.

"Yes, my divine."

No. No. No. No! No!

"NO MORE!" Your eyes snapped open as you threw yourself up into a sitting position, out of it and seeming to be in a half awake dream state. You were pushing whoever was around you away, whilst simultaneously trying to pull them closer.

"What's going on? Your grace, wake up now." Wanderer sighed whilst trying to hold you still to prevent you from hurting yourself in your panic.

"Hey, hey!" Was that Wanderer? "Calm it down love… Wake up." You began to scream, the dream still feeling so real. Tears rapidly rolled down your face as firm hands gripped onto your shoulders. "Hey! Fox boy! Get here now!" In any other circumstance, if you were fully awake, you would have giggled at Wanderers words. But not now, not when you killed them all. Not when you forced Tighnari and Zhongli to witness such brutal deaths.

"Seriously?! 'Wake up now?' That's all you could think of saying? I tried that already!" He growled lowly as he struggled to keep you calm, your cries and screaming tearing at what heart he wished he had.

"Our divine can hear our voices, that will keep them grounded onto something and saying 'wake up' just proves to them they're in a dream." Tighnari snapped lightly whilst fumbling in his bag before pulling out an orb filled with plants. "Hold them still!"

"What does it look like I'm trying to do? I'm not just sitting here for my own amusement." He spoke harshly to others, but his lips moved by your ear as he whispered. "Shh, I've got you. Everythings alright now, I'm here, I've got you. Love… Come back to me." At his gentle tone, your screams lessened into light whimpers. This prompted Tighnari to place the orb beneath your nose, and once the sharp smell of several herbs filled your senses your eyes snapped open.

"KAZUHA!" You panted, starting to cry again hiding within Wanderers arms. "X-xiao! Wanderer- What have I done?!" Tighnari immediately moved the orb away, tucking it back into his bag as he cupped your cheeks so you looked at him. Wanderer was a little taken aback at the possessive feeling within him especially after hearing you call his name like that. He'd never seen you look so helpless, almost like the way he once was when he was known as Kunikuzushi. Tighnari offered you the most reassuring smile he could,

"Hey there my Lotus, we've got you now. You're here darling, you're away from that place." Your whimpers shattered his heart, yet due to calling his name you didn't see Xiao rapidly approaching.

"Get away from them! What happened?" He moved to push them away to check to ensure you were alright, but Wanderer just shoved him away with his leg as he continued to hold you.

"Watch yourself little Adeptus, don't take what isn't yours." Xiao opened his mouth to say something more before Zhongli cut them off once walking into the room.

"Do not upset our Divine any further, your rage is distressing them." Xiao gazed at your tear stained face, but once your shaky hand reached up to his cheek curiosity filled his mind from your words.

"You're alive…"

"Yes, I am alive." He responded quickly, confused as to why you were asking. His debt didn't affect him whilst you were there, why would he be dead? Your head turned to see Wanderer holding you safely in his arms.

"Wanderer… My Kuni - you're alive too." Your eyes trailed around the room to try and find Kazuha. Where was he? Did you actually kill him whilst that horrible nightmare possessed your body? "Kazuha. Where is Kazuha?" You immediately stood up despite shaking, it felt like your body was still gaining its rightful strength after your dream. As you heard once in a previous life, all dreams pass a realm of reality. You tried to move forward, only for Xiao to hold you safely as you fell a little. Zhongli placed his hand upon your back,

"Tighnari, please go and get the samurai. I believe this is the only way we can calm them." Tighnari nodded before giving you one last look before leaving to quickly go and find Kazuha. He was always wandering your serenitea pot lands at this time, he wouldn't be too hard to track down. They soon moved you back down to sit upon the sofa again trying to keep your attention on them and not on the nightmare.

"I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry." Your tone was filled with nothing but heartbreak, your tears rolling down your flushed cheeks once again. "I'm sorry, please forgive me. Please don't hate me, I don't think I can bear it." Your soft sobs and begging flickered panic within your acolytes' hearts. Their own creator was begging them… This felt so wrong.

A bang from the main door made you jump whilst the others summoned their weapons to protect you, Wanderer standing in front of you to shield you with himself.

"Your grace!" The sound of Kazuha's voice made you sob out in relief as you pushed past to bring him into your arms, fist clinging onto Xiao's clothes as you held him.

"You're alive. You're both alive - you're okay." Taking a shaky breath in between your sobs you continued to cry out apologies. "I'm sorry, I'm so truly sorry." Falling to your knees, the wandering samurai and adeptus followed your lead and dropped to their knees with you to bring you into their warm embrace.

"My beloved divine, I am here now. I'm so sorry I'm late, dearest. I won't leave your side now okay?" You nodded against his warmth, hiccuping as after a while your sobs slowed.

"I killed you. I killed you Kazuha, fed you dreadful lies then killed you." Taking a jagged breath inward, your eyes met Xiaos. "You ended your own life due to my words in return for me sparing Morax. I- … I then went to kill Wanderer the same way as Xiao before waking. I forced Tighnari to watch all of it, I was so horrid I couldn't control my own body. Please, forgive me." A cup of cold water was soon brought to your lips by Tighnari as both anemo users held you closer. Softly sniffling, you began to drink slowly before coughing a little.

"Gentle, your grace. Do not rush…" Xiao gazed at you sorrowfully before looking downwards.

"No, you do not need to be forgiven. I do. If I was here, I would have destroyed the dream before it dared to even look upon you."

"Xiao," Zhongli began, his hand upon Xiao's head with a gentle smile. "Not now. This wasn't your fault, nor was it our divines. Bad dreams happen, I've seen my fair share during my lifetime. Many were brutal from the archon war." He sighed lightly, placing his hand carefully upon your cheek trying to comfort you. "But you see, dearest, they are a manifestation of our worst thoughts. Something that you would never do turns into something so real. We are all okay now, my divine, we're all here." His touch grounded you even more as he slowly lifted your now fragile form up and into his arms before getting you comfortable back on the sofa. Wanderer was sitting beside you, hand fiddling with the divine material of your clothing. Your gentle voice was but a whisper, but it made him practically melt.

"Please, hold me?" You didn't have to ask twice. You were immediately against his chest, safe and warm. A warm hand upon your back making soothing circles. Sure, you couldn't feel any heartbeat to ground you, but he was trying by channelling power through his vision to slowly bring it to life to mimic a heartbeat.

"Your grace, you can tuck your hands into my tail. You seem chilly… And don't worry, that was a case of a night terror and sleep paralysis. I've got little herbs to ensure that won't happen to you again." He paused, smiling as you held onto his tail. A light giggle escaped your lips as Xiao moved over to dry your tears. "We know we're safe with you, just like you know you're safe with us."

"What're you looking at, grandpa? They're safe with me, they don't need any extra. Move aside." Wanderer smirked before sticking his tongue out at Zhongli causing the archon to sigh. Though he buried his head against your neck as you held onto him hiding into his warmth with only a gentle whisper to be shared between you both. "I'm not going anywhere, yeah? I won't abandon you, and you won't abandon me. I've got you, I'll keep you safe." He pressed a gentle fleeting kiss to your shoulder before Tighnari took the place beside you, his tail soon brushing against your hand.

"Such a thing won't happen again." Xiao stated a matter of factly, crossing his arms against his chest. He'd be keeping a closer eye on your dreams now, so do not fret.

"And even if it did…" Kazuha's voice soon joined in, leaning over the sofa to fiddle with your strands of hair. Oh how you melted his heart, creator. "We will forever be here to pull you out of the world of dreams. They shall never hold onto you forever, but we shall do so."

"I agree with Kazuha, your grace. Forgive our selfishness, but you cannot get rid of us so easily. We shall forever be here with you and we won't ever lose you. As, my beloved, you shine like gold to us and us alone."

You're safe with them now, and believe me when I say you don't leave their arms for a long while. They never complain about this of course as this is all they want. You.♡

You have the control, your grace. Nothing like that will ever occur unless you desire so.

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin #genshin impact fanfiction #genshin impact creator #xiao x reader #zhongli x reader #tighnari x reader #wanderer x reader #kazuha x reader #sagau #genshin angst #genshin fluff

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unrequitedloveletter · 1 year

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Hi! I’m here to send in a request for platonic crows x reader where the reader can shapeshift - The main thing I was thinking of was just kinda friendship w the crows in general and their reactions to different things they learn about reader overtime and what they first though about reader vs now. Also here’s some ideas I’ve had about reader for if you do choose to do this request that might help!

-> I feel like reader would probably be able to change their body to be able to take on like a half form of things so like they could give them-self ears or something and depending on if they have a ‘Main form’ of sorts they could probably have some of the features of that thing like idk enhanced hearing or their good at being quiet/Sneaky.

-> Also I imagine that they might get like aches if they haven’t done it in a long while just based on the fact that in a way it’s like changing your bones/Bone structure if that makes sense so if they do it too much (Like an unhealthy amount like every single day for hours on end) Or haven’t done it in a long time they’d get aches n stuff

-> and also (Last thing I promise) They would probably use smaller/Quieter forms to scare/sneak up on people and just be an overall menace rlly

And of course if you aren’t interested in doing this request that’s fine too! Just let me know ^^ hope you have a wonderful day! :]

(Also could I be an anon? If so could I be 🍒Anon?)

Platonic! Crows x gn! Shapeshifter! Reader Headcanons

Hi! You can totally be the cherry anon if you want, that's cool with me! I'm sorry it took me a bit to see this, I've been writing requests from the bottom of my inbox to the top of it lately so that I could get the oldest requests done first, and seeing this in my inbox, I just knew I'd have a blast! I was right, writing this was so much fun.

I did it as headcanons to keep the fic from breaching a 15k word limit which I knew I'd get to if I let myself and I didn't want this fic to run too long! I hope that that's all right with you and if not, I apologize and I can rewrite if you'd like me to!

Fic type- fluff

Warnings-mentions of tarantulas, flies (the reader once turns themself into a fly on the wall) and spiders

(no gif because I sadly couldn't find one of the crows on the rooftop)

Okay, so!

Your status as a shapeshifter is kind of just...known amongst the crows?

Like, they all know about it and it just kind of exists as another one of your attributes. It’s not a big deal, and nobody has ever really made it out to be.

You’re able to enhance your hearing so that you can hear pretty far out, which comes in handy a lot on heist jobs, especially if you can make it so that you can be standing on the total opposite side of wherever you need to be for the heist and still be able to hear Kaz and Nina bickering at the checkpoint.

You’re also able to make yourself quieter, which comes in handy a lot on jobs too, especially when you need to focus on being stealthy and go unseen and unheard.

Now that I think of it, there’s probably a way that you can shift to match your surroundings or like, make them match you kind of, and make yourself invisible, which is actually a super cool concept and I don’t want to get sidetracked by it, so next thing!

There’s a healthy amount of times that you should shapeshift on a regular basis. You go off that and start doing it too much or not doing it enough, you get really bad aches and pains.

I feel like you’d get them all over and they would hurt as much as a really bad migraine. It happens at random and can sometimes last a couple of days, too. All in all, the pain part of it isn’t really a fun or enjoyable experience so you try to shapeshift consistently

YOU WOULD TOTALLY SHAPESHIFT INTO RANDOM SHIT TO SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF PEOPLE-

forgive the caps, I would a thousand percent do the same thing and I got excited when I remembered that that was a possibility.

You’d probably shapeshift into something like a tarantula and just spend hours relaxing in a random corner of Wylans lab weaving webs and hanging from the ceiling and being all cool, and then Jesper comes in and you go to greet him and he’s like “saints, what is that?"

and then Wylan is just like “it’s Y/N? Their favorite color is the dots on their back? How could you not recognize them?”

“Oh, I’m sorry Wylan, I’m just not so used to seeing my best friend as a bloody tarantula!”

You probably shapeshift into a cat to be a menace to Kaz

the concept of you just kind of showing up at his office window and then doing that thing that cats do where they nap in direct line of wherever the sun is coming in is something I love more than life itself

that’s nOT MENACING, BACK ON TRACK

AFTER you’ve sunbathed an appropriate amount of time, you, in the form of a cat, jump onto Kaz’s desk and glare at him the entirety of the time that it takes you to bring his to-go cup of coffee closer and closer to the edge of his desk, until it tips over and spills.

that concept has made me laugh for the last ten minutes

Kaz almost hates you for that every time you do it, even though he knows you’re only doing it because he did something to piss you off first and he just considers it fair when he remembers that much.

You also buy him a replacement coffee out of the kindness of your heart, though you never actually apologize to him

to be menacing in the direction of Matthias and Nina, you also take up the form of a spider. Neither of them really like spiders and you just kind of mess with them for two minutes before it gets old and you switch into something else.

Inej is a cat person through and through, and there aren’t many ways in which you can mess with her, nor do you want to because knife wife WILL use knives if she doesn't recognize the fact that whatever you shift into is you and the possibility, though slight, is still there.

You go to Inej as a cat the most often, though.

You’re able to keep up with her when she’s running through the barrel on her missions for Kaz, and the naps in the sun are best when you’re laying on one of Inejs coats while she spars with Jesper

You’ve also been a literal fly on the wall to get intel for Kaz before, but that was because you’d offered, and it was exhausting. You got a lot of good intel from that but you were like “nah, never again. Not for less than a hundred million kruge. Never”

generally, it’s a very chaotic but a very fun existence, and you wouldn’t trade a minute of it for anything

#kaz brekker #inej ghafa #wylan van eck #jesper fahey #nina zenik #matthias helvar #kaz brekker x reader #inej ghafa x reader #wylan van eck x reader #jesper fahey x reader #nina zenik x reader #matthias helvar x reader #six of crows #shadow and bone

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nat-1-whump · 1 year

Text

🪄 Effects of using magic

Fantasy whump ideas no. 1

(I may or may not have been partially inspired by various D&D classes in making this...)

Exhaustion. Using magic is incredibly tiring. Even as their body is still flooded with adrenaline from fighting for their life, Whumpee is exhausted and collapses at the first chance they get. If they're traveling with others, do they try to wake Whumpee up, or let them sleep? Maybe a party member wraps a blanket around them, praying they wake up soon. Or maybe they wake up on the ground hours later, forgotten.

Loss of memory, personality, or even their own sanity. As Whumpee uses more and more of their power, they begin to lose themself. They forget their closest friends, breaking Caretaker's heart when they learn that Whumpee doesn't remember them. Eventually they can't even remember their own name, or why they turned to magic in the first place. They no longer know who or what they're fighting for. And this makes them miserable, knowing that they chose to give themselves up to magic, but not knowing the reason why.

Injury (TW for brief mentions of blood, bruises, and broken bones). Magic takes a toll on the body, and Whumpee has to consider how much they're willing to give. They feel sick, like their organs are melting into slush. Maybe bruises appear across their skin, or blood leaks from their eyes, their mouth, their fingertips, staining their arcane focus red. With stronger magic, Whumpee feels their bones begin to crack. The rest of the party begs them to stop doing this to themself, as Caretaker gently bandages their latest wounds. Or maybe their party doesn't care, using Whumpee as a weapon that can simply be tossed aside when it breaks.

Evil warlock pact. This can work with any of the above, but basically, there is some other entity granting Whumpee their power at a cost. Maybe what it gives in magic, it takes in life force. It could be a malevolent deity that has its own motives for granting Whumpee power, and maybe it's not being completely honest as to what those motives are.

Reputation/social standing. For whatever reason, magic is extremely taboo. Nobody understands why Whumpee uses it, assuming that they're dangerous, monstrous, and greedy for power. Maybe Whumpee didn't even choose to be magical, they just naturally are. Yet, they hate themselves for it, wanting nothing more but to wash the magic from their veins. There's no safe place for them. They're always on the run, pushing away those who care about them for fear of being found out.

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whumpshaped · 4 months

Text

deer anon asked:

It's me, ya bitch, back at it again with more horrible whump ideas. Very please that so far, you have entertained my shenanigans, because thus far, my cat has been the only one to sit through my horrendous ideas, and she is indeed, quite poor company.

Characters infected with something, characters who know they're going to lose their mind or change into something vile and violent, characters who know that they need to leave their team behind now before they try to kill them and before their team has no choice but to destroy them. Characters who can't leave their team (or family, lovers, friends...) for various reasons. Characters spitting out their lungs over the floor while staring at those they love, begging them to just kill them before it's too late.

And those who love them realizing that their only choice is to shoot their best friend.

Everybody hurts, nobody wins, the world sucks, and I really need to start posting all my ideas on my own blog but BOY do I love seeing what you manage to do with em 😅

Follow up to my 'slowly becoming a monster' ask because it popped into mind just as I hit send:

Whumpee's/infected char's loved ones choosing to instead cage/restrain them until they can find a way to save them.

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tw body horror, nonhuman whumpee, whumpee turned whumper, bad caretaker, guns, infection whump, forced to hurt

"Please!" Whumpee screamed, voice so scratchy and distorted that if Caretaker hadn't been looking straight at them, they would've never guessed it was their friend speaking. They could hardly believe it, even like this. "I don't know how long... I can keep this thing at bay... It wants to– It wants to kill– It wants to kill you–"

"You'd never hurt me," Caretaker said tearily. "I know you wouldn't."

"But it would. Caretaker, this isn't... this isn't me." Whumpee shivered, then coughed, and Caretaker couldn't even look at the fresh blood splatter on the floor. "Please. Please, let me go out as... somewhat myself. Before I hurt you. I don't want to hurt you," they pleaded between two sobs.

"I... I can't." They couldn't even raise the gun. Couldn't even take aim. It was too much. "I can't kill you. I can't. We can still find a way to reverse this–"

Whumpee lunged before they could react. They tore the gun out of their hand and shoved the barrel into their own mouth, ready to end it all– but their attempt was interrupted by a violent coughing fit that made them drop the weapon. Caretaker snatched it up immediately and took several steps back, their heart hammering in their chest as they realised just how close they'd come to losing Whumpee.

"Just fucking do it, goddammit!" Whumpee yelled, but they sounded weaker than before. Their speech was becoming... garbled and difficult to understand, and the involuntary muscle spasms came quicker and quicker, one after the other until Whumpee was but a convulsing mess on the floor.

Caretaker wanted to help. They wanted to turn them onto their side and make sure they didn't choke, or whatever the protocol was in this situation, they couldn't even remember, what if they made it worse– But they never got the chance.

Whumpee's body changed within seconds. Their skin tore and their bones cracked as the infection forced them into a new shape, their limbs bending in unnatural ways and taking on an entirely new appearance. Their back split open with a sickening squelch, several tentacles sprouting from the wound like an octopus was trying to escape from inside.

Caretaker screamed and tried to run off, but something wrapped around their ankle and made them trip. The thing yanked them back effortlessly, and they soon found themself trapped under Whumpee's new, monstrous body, with rows of sharp teeth uncomfortably close to their throat.

"Stop!" they shrieked, but the creature — their friend — showed no signs of understanding them. "Whumpee, stop it! Please! Stop!"

Drops of saliva landed on their cheeks as the thing gnashed its teeth and prepared to tear their throat out, and Caretaker acted on instinct. The sound of the gun going off was unbearably loud, rivalled only by the pained cry of the monster. It was an utterly inhumane sound that grated on Caretaker's ears, and they wasted no time getting away from it. They didn't turn to look where the bullet had hit it.

They opened the door and slammed it shut as soon as they were outside, but Whumpee, or what had remained of them, crashed into it within the next second. Its arm broke through the wood and managed to scratch Caretaker, making them yelp and give up on the idea that locking the stupid thing would do anything.

They had to run. They had to run fast.

They weren't even at the stairs when the thing got out, and the way it moved sounded like the biggest spider was chasing them down. They jumped over several steps while blindly shooting backwards, only guessing that some of the bullets had hit from the way the monster shrieked.

"I'm sorry!" they cried. "Whumpee, please! Leave me alone! I'm sorry!"

The creature was faster than them, and in a last ditch effort, Caretaker spun around and tried to aim for its head. They should've honoured Whumpee's wish. They should've done this while their friend was still human. They were the worst fucking friend.

Bang.

It collapsed in a heap not too far from Caretaker, too many limbs twitching with entirely too much life for something that had been shot this many times. It was still growling and groaning, and... Caretaker suddenly had an outlandish idea.

If it wasn't dying... If it was just incapacitated... If it could be dragged around safely... The basement door was solid metal... There was some rope in the garage...

They looked at the monster's gruesome face and thought of Whumpee's soft features. What if they could still undo this? What if they could bring them back? What if Whumpee's consciousness was still in there, trapped and waiting to be freed?

"I'll help," Caretaker choked out. "I'll help you. I'll make this right. I'll– I'll get you back. I swear."

#asks #deer anon #whump #whump drabble #body horror #nonhuman whumpee #whumpee turned whumper #bad caretaker #guns #infection whump #forced to hurt

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