hey girl are you a wheelchair cuz i’d love to sit on your face aha
I haven't been on this platform properly in months and this is what I return to
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[at a restaurant]
Stephanie, the waitress: Police and kids five and under eat for free.
Dick: *subtly nudges Damian*
Damian: I'm a cop.
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Life... It never die
Women are my favorite guy...
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10 year old tim drake leaving hate comments on every single robin jason post ever saying shit like "i hope this fucker kills himself so the first one comes back "
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i imagine that someone in gotham runs a 'how long has it been since bruce wayne adopted a kid?' twitter and it updates regularly with the exact number of days since whatever child's official adoption announcement. the replies are full of jokes about bruce wayne's adoption addiction
i also imagine that every once in a while, bruce wayne's official twitter account qrt's the latest countdown with 0 days, and that's how the public finds out about the latest wayne kid
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Damian: *finds a stray cat*
Damian: Can we keep it?
Selina: Your dad is allergic.
Damian: Father can stay outside.
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