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#incorrect dc quotes
incorrectbatfam · 3 days
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Dick: What’d you make for Selina?
Bruce, staring at the food he burned: Regret.
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super-marvel-dc · 2 days
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Y/N, getting their arm stitched up by Roy: *Lets out a muffled scream with Jason's belt in their mouth*
Jason: Always wanted your teeth marks in my belt, but never thought of it this way.
Roy, and Y/N: *Slowly looks up at Jason*
Jason: What? Bad timing?
Roy: Ya think!
Y/N, at the same time as Roy: *Still with the belt in their mouth* ya tink!
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Incorrect Batfam Quotes
Tim: *develops a plan
Steph: Not gonna lie, that sounds like a war crime.
Tim: It’s never a war crime the first time. Now whether it gets designated a war crime after…
Tim: That’s not my problem.
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superbat-love · 11 hours
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Superman: So this is Earth-6067.
Batman: There are no signs of sentient creatures living on this planet, or anywhere else in this universe.
Superman: [looks sad] Oh.
Batman: But take a look at this. [shows him a microscope] I’ve discovered a pair of protozoans.
Superman: Oh thank god! We found this universe’s Bruce and Clark.
Batman: …They’re microorganisms, Clark.
Superman: Well I just know that we’ll always be together in every universe, no matter the shape or form.
Batman: [looking through the microscope and seeing one of the protozoa inch closer towards the light while the other stays away] Hn. I’ll bring them to the lab for further study.
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kaethefangirl · 2 days
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Bruce: *has the batkids lined up* Who did it? Tim: If this is about Damian's toothbrush, it was Jason's idea. Dick: You found it!? Stephanie you said he wouldn't find it! Damian: What did you do with my toothbrush, Drake. WHAT DID YOU DO??? Tim: *laughs* Stephanie: He couldn't have! Cass: *blinks* Jason: I live for chaos. Bruce: I was asking who drank the last of the milk and left an empty carton. The batkids: ... Duke: It was me.
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batfamgalore · 14 hours
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*Batbros just starting to recover after they find out Dick is actually alive. They are on their first fam mission since. Tim starts tearing up but is trying to cover it up*
Dick: What you said at my funeral made me mist up as well. It was wonderful. Really moving.
Jason: You were there?
Dick: Of course. I was in the coffin.
Tim: Oh! I was gonna check there.
Dick: That would’ve been weird.
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wondersinwaynemanor · 15 hours
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some Wayne gala shenanigans
Damian: Some people have no shame.
Jon, a plate of brûlée on his hand: What do you mean?
Damian: Tt. Those so called classy, but actually pretentious women are embarrassing themselves for not understanding the memo.
Jon: What memo?
Damian turns his eyes away from the sight of some women, trying their best to get his brothers' attention and to the said memo.
As said memo are two redheads, and a half kryptonian and half human eating by the food area.
more women approach his brothers.
Damian, frowns: We need to save Richard, Todd and Drake.
Jon: They do look uncomfortable.
Damian, sighs: I have to enter the battlefield.
Jon, pats Damian's shoulder: You will be remembered by your bravery, Dames.
Damian breathes and walks towards the inner circle.
before Damian can even say anything else, the women have started cooing at him.
Damian internally cringes and he hopes this would be worth it.
thankfully, Damian don't have to suffer long as Wally, Roy and Conner join the commotion.
Roy: Sorry, Jaybaby. *he has that crooked smile, that Jason personally adores, as he wraps an arm around his waist* I was caught up at the food buffet. Want something to eat?
Jason, internally thanks the heavens for Roy and leans close to him: Starved. Excuses, everyone.
Todd is saved. Check.
Wally: Come on, honey. *holds Dick's hand and leads him away* I deserve a dance.
Dick, smiles like an idiot and holds Wally's hand: I better go, ladies. He gets a temper. Have a good night.
Richard is saved. Check.
Conner, touches Tim's shoulder then his cheek: Want something to drink? You seem tired, babe.
Tim, finally feeling awake for the first time since this happened and touches Conner's hand that's on his face: Yes, please, babe. Ladies, will you excuse me?
Drake is saved. Check.
the ladies are left speechless. some are jealous. some are frustrated they can't get the Wayne fortune. but, some are in awe.
Damian, lightly smirks. It's never gonna happen, ladies. Now, enjoy your night. Excuse me.
he finds Jon by the sweets section.
Damian, nudges Jon's arm: Thank you for that, Jon.
Jon, smiles: It's nothing. I needed to save you too.
they give each other a high five then proceed to challenge the other on who can eat the most chocolate covered strawberries.
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ambriel-angstwitch · 9 hours
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Jason: Rules are made to be broken.
Bruce: They were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken.
Stephanie: Uh, piñatas.
Duke: Glow sticks.
Tim: Karate boards.
Dick: Spaghetti when you have a small pot.
Damian: Rules.
Bruce:
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incorrect-dc-qoutes · 17 hours
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Steph: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming? Dick: Can everyone in this godforsaken group please learn the skill called "Think Before You Speak"? Jason: Ya know... it might be.
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ryemiffie · 1 day
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More quotes from my day as Batman incorrect quotes:
Dick, sobbing: You've gotta stop calling people fuckass hoes!
Tim: Then bitches best stop being fuckass hoes.
Dick: Tim, please!
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dc-and-damirae · 2 days
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cass: Blackmail is such an ugly word. I prefer extortion. The X makes it sound cool.
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incorrectbatfam · 2 days
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Damian: My grandfather is in the backyard stabbing the ground with his sword trying to render the soil barren by killing the worms but luckily my sister has trained them all in classical ballet and they keep pirouetting away from the blade.
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Incorrect Batfam Quotes
*All of the Batkids have been kidnapped
Kidnapper: *calls Bruce
Kidnapper: We have your children.
Bruce: …
Bruce: Let me speak to them.
Kidnapper: Alright. *puts the call on speaker
Bruce: Damian’s in charge.
Batkids: *all start arguing about who should be in charge to the point of scaring the kidnappers into letting them go
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deadmanofthenight · 12 hours
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Batman: Look, last night was a mistake.
Joker: A sexy mistake.
Batman, eye twitching: You bombed an entire building just because I haven't visited you at Arkham asylum for two weeks. So no, that was not a sexy mistake.
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