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#dc incorrect quotes
Dick: how's everyone doing?
Barbara: i'm breathing.
Dick: setting the bar pretty low, huh?
Barbara: well, it's more than Tim.
Tim, having a panic attack and at least 4 different crisis in the corner: honestly, fuck you.
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super-marvel-dc · 2 days
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Y/N, getting their arm stitched up by Roy: *Lets out a muffled scream with Jason's belt in their mouth*
Jason: Always wanted your teeth marks in my belt, but never thought of it this way.
Roy, and Y/N: *Slowly looks up at Jason*
Jason: What? Bad timing?
Roy: Ya think!
Y/N, at the same time as Roy: *Still with the belt in their mouth* ya tink!
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shyjusticewarrior · 2 days
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Dick: Hey, you know what I just realised? If you guys ever have kids-
Jason: Whoa, whoa, whoa, we’re having kids?
Duke: I call godfather!
Dick: You can't just call godfather... Don't you think his older brother should be godfather?
Duke: Sure, if he cared enough to call it first.
Rose: Guys, you're a few steps ahead of us.
Jason: Yeah, big zero gravity moon steps.
Barbara: Oh! Oh, I just thought of the greatest wedding gift to get you.
Steph: Oh, I'll go in on that with you! I couldn't think of anything.
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incorrect-dc-qoutes · 14 hours
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Steph: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming? Dick: Can everyone in this godforsaken group please learn the skill called "Think Before You Speak"? Jason: Ya know... it might be.
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strslv-4sh · 1 day
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Jon: I'm cold :(
Damian, already putting his jacket on Jon: Didn't I tell you to bring a jacket? >:(
Any other person: I'm cold :(
Damian: This sounds like your problem
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ryemiffie · 1 day
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More quotes from my day as Batman incorrect quotes:
Dick, sobbing: You've gotta stop calling people fuckass hoes!
Tim: Then bitches best stop being fuckass hoes.
Dick: Tim, please!
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dc-and-damirae · 2 days
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cass: Blackmail is such an ugly word. I prefer extortion. The X makes it sound cool.
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kaiyaamin · 3 hours
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Bruce: Damin it
Dick: you look mad, you need a hug! (arms are wide open for a hug)
Bruce: No Dick, I don't need a hug (signs)
Dick: (proceeds to try to hug Bruce)
Bruce: Nooo, I said no hug (trying to kick Dick away)
Dick: Don't fight it, it'll make you feel better
Bruce: gives up and lets Dick hug him, can you let go now?
Dick: Do you feel better?
Bruce: No
Dick: then it hasn't kicked in yet
Jason: Sees the hug and joins in
Bruce: who took my wallet?
Jason: Sorry.
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iwannabealice · 28 days
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clark: i met this boy last night that seemed to really hate you
bruce: that could be anyone, what did he look like?
clark: tall, white, dark hair, really big-
bruce: ah, that’d be jason. my son
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thedevilundercover · 1 month
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Jason: How old are you actually, Timberlina?
Tim, thinking about it:… do you mean physically, mentally, or the amount of years I have been in existence
Damian, unapologetically eavesdropping: TT, what are you going in about drake
Jason: uhh the amount of years you’ve been in existence?
Tim: 35 years
Jason:
Damian:
The entire Batfam:
everyone: what the fuck tim?
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Dick: You’re ignoring all your problems.
Tim: I know.
Dick: You know that an unhealthy coping mechanism, right?
Tim: I’m ignoring that too.
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keratin-moth · 9 months
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Dick, after sleeping for 4 hours due to a nightmare, an exhausting police shift, a long Blüdhaven patrol and an annoyingly long meeting with Batman before their Gotham patrol: Guys please can you quiet down? I can’t focus.
Jason and Damian looking concerned: We haven’t said anything in the past 30 minutes??
Tim on his 52nd hour of no sleep full of caffeine: You hear the voices too?
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Jason: I accidentally poisoned one of our drinks, but I don’t remember which one
Dick: EXCUSE ME-
Damian: With the way this gala’s going, I hope it’s mine
Tim: *chugs his drink*
Bruce: *quickly takes Y/N’s drink before she can do the same*
Y/N: Aw man :(
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Roy: Having two partners is both amazing and complicated. But all our problems are solved with communication. Kory: It’s my turn to cuddle Jason. Roy: FIVE MORE MINUTES DAMMIT!
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strslv-4sh · 1 day
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*At Jondami's marriage*
*Jason calls Jon for a private conversation and Jon is clearly nervous*
Jason, looking deep into Jon's soul through his eyes: Look, I'll let it clear, if you hurt my brother, just a little, make him cry, or even make him sad, just once, I will come after you with kryptonite and will hunt you to hell if necessary. Got it?
Jon, shaking his head: Definitely
Jason, narrowing his eyes: You sure?
Jon: Yes! It was clear as day
Jason, instantly becoming less threatening and patting Jon on the back: Good, welcome to the family
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