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frappegoddess · 2 days

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Bruce Wayne uses his kids to threaten Lex Luthor, whilst simultaneously being the biggest drama queen known to man

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*At a gala*

Brucie: Dick, I've trained you for this moment, make me proud.

Dick: *Brings a posse of reporters and approaches Lex to expose him for his most heinous plans*

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Lex: Damian can't drink that, it's alcoholic. You should not have kids Brucie.

Bruce: *Sues Lex for harrassment*

Also Bruce: *Wins and let's it become the Gotham Gazette's biggest headline*

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Tim: *Hacks Twitter and posts drunk pictures of Lex*

Also Tim: *Makes sure Lex can't access all his social media accounts or sue for defamation*

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Damian: *Curses Lex in Arabic*

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Steph: *Starts a rumour that Lex Luthor is a furry*

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Lex Luthor: *Tries to sue*

Also Lex: *Always loses*

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Bruce Wayne and the batfam have made Lex Luthor Gotham's public enemy.

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Idea creds to: @tims-missing-spleen

#lol #batfamily #batman #dc comics #batfam #bruce wayne #dc universe #lex luthor #dc batman #dick grayson #tim drake wayne #tim drake #damian wayne #stephanie brown #gotham #batfam incorrect quotes

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nightwolf14292 · 2 days

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Hey! Look! An overdone meme! Still fun to draw tho

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shyjusticewarrior · 2 days

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Duke: What are you doing here?

Duke: ... Your excellency.

Damian: You don't call her "your excellency."

Talia: No, no, I kinda like it.

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incorrect-batfam-quotes-mostly · 6 hours

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Jason, covered in blood: haha it’s fine, I’m fine, everything is fine

Dick: Jason I mean this in the nicest way possible, you are the most mentally fucked up person I know

#batfam #batfam incorrect quotes #dc #dc incorrect quotes #batman #dick grayson #jason todd

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batfambrainrotbeloved · 23 hours

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GUESS WHOSE BACCKKK?? WITH YET ANOTHER UPDATE ✨✨✨✨

The Drakes Spoiled Brat (im sorry dad) is back AGAIN- for like the third time this week (I for one, am not sorry)

Name: As above Rating: General Audiences Chapter: 5/?? Word count: 16,538 Relationships: Batfam + Extended DC friends/fam Summary: Canon Timeline, Red Robin died alone long after his family fell apart with Bruce vanishing. His last moments wishing that out of everyone he saved, his family would be included.

Suprise suprise- he gets that chance when he wakes up at 5 y/o only a year after Robin made his debute.

Now as both the elusive Gotham Vigilante Cardinal (a bird of devotion) and Timothy Drake (his rich asshole persona version of Brucie Wayne)

Tim will fight tooth and nail for his families happily ever after (If only he fought as hard for his own happiness)

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jpeg-dot-jpeg · 1 day

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Oliver: Tell your rugrat to stop correcting my form.

Bruce: You should listen to him, he's an experienced combatant.

Oliver: Do you think your 10 year old is smarter than me?

Bruce: All of my children are smarter than you.

#dc incorrect quotes #batfam incorrect quotes #batdad #oliver queen #bruce wayne

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jasontoddsknifecollection · 20 hours

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*Jason telling tim the story of how they started using apple*

Tim: oh, so you're a coward

#jason todd #tim drake #batfam #batfam incorrect quotes

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elecilaombre · 1 month

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Tim * holding a can of Pepsi * : Do you guys want some Pespi ?

Jason* laughing* : Some what ?

Tim : Pespi .

Duke : It's PePsi not PeSpi Timmy.

Tim : That's what I said Pespi.

Tim : Pespi

Duke : Please would you...

Tim * interrupting Duke * : Pespi

Tim * shrugging* : It's normal it's because I'm ambidextrous.

Damian : Ambidextrous ?

Stephanie * chirping in* : He means Bisexual !

Dick * at the same time * : He means bilingual !

Bruce * tired dad™* : He means he has dyslexia.

#tim drake #batfam #jason todd #batfamily #dc comics #dick grayson #bruce wayne #damian wayne #duke thomas #stehanie brown #batfam incorrect quotes #incorrect quotes

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91-1lover · 1 month

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What if Damian and Tim love each other and even like? It's just more of a situation "Manipulating others is easier ". Maybe an example will help;

Damian: Father, May I go to Zoo today?

Bruce:No Damian, you're grounded.

Tim:Oh, that's bad. I could go with you to take photos of otter, but if you are not going I think I will stay too. What's a zoo without company. Maybe I will go with Kon next week.

Bruce *Super happy in a moment of thinking his youngest kids getting along*: If you two agree not to kill each other, Damian can go

Tim and Damian:*Knowing looks*

Or situation like;

Tim who has abandoned issues and is having fear of people leaving him: Dick is mad at me. Can you stab me so he will be in his mother hen mode Instead?

Damian who would like to have 5 minutes of peace from Grayson: Say no more

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goodoldfashionedengineer · 1 month

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The only time when all the batkids will work together in perfect harmony is to prank Bruce.

And for the best prank all they needed was a few label makers.

Labels are put on everything.

On every mug, on every plate, on every bandaid package.

The chocolate bars are labeled "BatSnack".

The fruits become "Batana", "Batricot" and "Batermelon".

Every button on the microwave, every key on the keyboard, it all gets a label.

"Batstop button", "Batstart button", "Bat-A-key", Bat-Enter-key".

Bruce's desk isn't simply the "Batdesk". It is the "Batwood construction surface".

There is a label beneath the desk too.

Originally named "underside of Batwood construction surface".

It takes days, weeks, months to remove all the labels.

Until one day, when Bruce makes a few new installations in the cave.

Surely some higher being is laughing at him right now, Bruce thinks, as he pulls of the last one.

"Batceiling"

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strawberry-forest-does-stuff · 3 months

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#batfam incorrect quotes #batfam #batfamily #nightwing #dick grayson #red hood #jason todd #red robin #red robin dc #tim drake #tim drake is a menace

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nightwolf14292 · 8 hours

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"Why on Earth are you making chocolate pudding-?"

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shyjusticewarrior · 2 days

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Tim: Ya know, whenever Jason starts talking I think to myself "maybe this time it'll make sense."

Tim: I'm always wrong.

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incorrect-batfam-quotes-mostly · 24 days

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Bruce, during a family meeting: this is just a reminder therapy is covered by our health insurance plan

Tim: why do you always look at me when you say that

#batfam #batfam incorrect quotes #dc #dc incorrect quotes #batman #tim drake #bruce wayne

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batfambrainrotbeloved · 5 hours

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Batfam quotes as quotes from my dnd group (part 4)(a few mild nsfw so be warned, but again- dnd, so it was inevitable)

Dick:“Zantana is in the fucking shadow realm assembling her Yu-gi-o deck” Duke:"I'm going to look you in the eyes and be difficult, you are well within your right to refuse me" Tim:"It's Saprophysis- okay Zara I know you wanna spell it so it goes F..." Jason:"..." Jason:"You immediately fucked that up-" Tim:"Kon do you not trust me anymore"? Luthor:"Lie to him Kon" Kon:"Nah its just that your now really fucking hot-" Luthor:"Kon NO" Damian:“If he had drowned I would have been like- oh well" Tim to Ra: “May I ask? Oh no- I will ask- Whose terrarium do you crawl around in”? Babs:“She's more of an object” Dick:“Aren't we all” Jason:“..Objects to the system” Steph:“Maybe that's what's on my horizon… glue” Damian:“The Raven queen does not permit you to walk away-” Jason:"But what if I jump"? N/A Goon:“You will watch them make out” Steph:"Oh... oh nooo- anything but t h a t" Jason:“What does a shark cock look like- I'm curious”? Duke:“Does it like.. Roll up”? Steph:“I mean a shark vagina actually looks fairly normal, you look at it and go yeah that's a vagina” Damian:"I hate you all."

#batfamily #batfam #jason todd #tim drake #dick grayson #damian wayne #stephanie brown #duke thomas #batfam incorrect quotes #incorrect batfamily quotes #incorrect batman quotes #incorrect batboys quotes #incorrect quotes #dc incorrect quotes #batman incorrect quotes #dc batfam #bat siblings #dc

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ktkat99 · 6 months

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Anytime Damian is upset with Alfred for whatever reason, he does thing that he THINKS normal rebellious kids do.

Dick- Damian, what are you doing

Damian, not even looking up- Pennyworth grounded me from patrol until I've recovered. Therefore, I am playing my DS on the couch all day.

Dick- Wow. Really sticking it to the man, aren't you?

Damian- I could be reading a book right now. Something that could benefit my future. But nooooo. I'm acting out.

Jason- Dude, just stop

Damian- Why? We all know his favorite part of dinner preparation is chopping the vegetables. Imagine his face when he finds that everything has already been diced to perfection?

Jason- ... I'm going to have to teach you how to egg houses, aren't I?

*Taylor Swift playing over the speakers throughout the entire manor*

Bruce- Alfred, what's with the music?

Alfred- Master Damian intends to annoy me into letting him patrol tonight.

Bruce- And you... don't like Taylor Swift?

Alfred- He believes that we all enjoy Bach as much as he does.

Alfred- Master Dick is currently convincing his other siblings to take the opportunity to throw a dance party

#batman #batfam #batbrats #damian wayne #bruce wayne #robin #nightwing #dick greyson #jason todd #red hood #batfam incorrect quotes

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