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“the problem is its never gonna be what all the fans want” imo the problem is the majority of fans have bad fucking taste like. if you write a story with the intent to keep editing it in line with what fans want you’re gonna end up with a shitty story. obviously you can take in criticism from early access but once you publish the thing you shouldn’t constantly be retconning characterization wtf. good god
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Cigarettes were unhealthy as shit but at least they made you look fuckable. people looked fuckable. now everytime someone takes a hit from their vape, we lose more of our eroticism
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tiredofsatansbullshit · 14 hours
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Plot armor but it’s Bruce Wayne’s wealth.
Bruce is one of the richest men in the world. Bruce does not want to be one of the richest men in world.
He starts by implementing high starting salaries and full health care coverages for all levels at Wayne Enterprises. This in vastly improves retention and worker productivity, and WE profits soar. He increases PTO, grants generous parental and family leave, funds diversity initiatives, boosts salaries again. WE is ranked “#1 worker-friendly corporation”, and productively and profits soar again.
Ok, so clearly investing his workers isn’t the profit-destroying doomed strategy his peers claim it is. Bruce is going to keep doing it obviously (his next initiative is to ensure all part-time and contractors get the same benefits and pay as full time employees), but he is going to have to find a different way to dump his money.
But you know what else is supposed to be prohibitively expensive? Green and ethical initiatives. Yes, Bruce can do that. He creates and fund a 10 year plan to covert all Wayne facilities to renewable energy. He overhauls all factories to employ the best environmentally friendly practices and technologies. He cuts contracts with all suppliers that engage in unethical employment practices and pays for other to upgrade their equipment and facilities to meet WE’s new environmental and safety requirements. He spares no expense.
Yeah, Wayne Enterprises is so successful that they spin off an entire new business arm focused on helping other companies convert to environmentally friendly and safe practices like they did in an efficient, cost effective, successful way.
Admittedly, investing in his own company was probably never going to be the best way to get rid of his wealth. He slashes his own salary to a pittance (god knows he has more money than he could possibly know what to do with already) and keeps investing the profits back into the workers, and WE keeps responding with nearly terrifying success.
So WE is a no-go, and Bruce now has numerous angry billionaires on his back because they’ve been claiming all these measures he’s implementing are too expensive to justify for decades and they’re finding it a little hard to keep the wool over everyone’s eyes when Idiot Softheart Bruice Wayne has money spilling out his ears. BUT Bruce can invest in Gotham. That’ll go well, right?
Gotham’s infrastructure is the OSHA anti-Christ and even what little is up to code is constantly getting destroyed by Rogue attacks. Surely THAT will be a money sink.
Except the only non-corrupt employer in Gotham city is….Wayne Enterprises. Or contractors or companies or businesses that somehow, in some way or other, feed back to WE. Paying wholesale for improvement to Gotham’s infrastructure somehow increases WE’s profits.
Bruce funds a full system overhaul of Gotham hospital (it’s not his fault the best administrative system software is WE—he looked), he sets up foundations and trusts for shelters, free clinics, schools, meal plans, day care, literally anything he can think of.
Gotham continues to be a shithole. Bruce Wayne continues to be richer than god against his Batman-ingrained will.
Oh, and Bruice Wayne is no longer viewed as solely a spoiled idiot nepo baby. The public responds by investing in WE and anything else he owns, and stop doing this, please.
Bruce sets up a foundation to pay the college tuition of every Gotham citizen who applies. It’s so successful that within 10 years, donations from previous recipients more than cover incoming need, and Bruce can’t even donate to his own charity.
But by this time, Bruce has children. If he can’t get rid of his wealth, he can at least distribute it, right?
Except Dick Grayson absolutely refuses to receive any of his money, won’t touch his trust fund, and in fact has never been so successful and creative with his hacking skills as he is in dumping the money BACK on Bruce. Jason died and won’t legally resurrect to take his trust fund. Tim has his own inherited wealth, refuses to inherit more, and in fact happily joins forces with Dick to hack accounts and return whatever money he tries to give them. Cass has no concept of monetary wealth and gives him panicked, overwhelmed eyes whenever he so much as implies offering more than $100 at once. Damian is showing worrying signs of following in his precious Richard’s footsteps, and Babs barely allows him to fund tech for the Clocktower. At least Steph lets him pay for her tuition and uses his credit card to buy unholy amounts of Batburger. But that is hardly a drop in the ocean of Bruce’s wealth. And she won’t even accept a trust fund of only one million.
Jason wins for best-worst child though because he currently runs a very lucrative crime empire. And although he pours the vast, vast majority of his profits back into Crime Alley, whenever he gets a little too rich for his tastes, he dumps the money on Bruce. At this point, Bruce almost wishes he was being used for money laundering because then he’s at least not have the money.
So children—generous, kindhearted, stubborn till the day they die the little shits, children—are also out.
Bruce was funding the Justice League. But then finances were leaked, and the public had an outcry over one man holding so much sway over the world’s superheroes (nevermind Bruce is one of those superheroes—but the public can’t know that). So Bruce had to do some fancy PR trickery, concede to a policy of not receiving a majority of funds from one individual, and significantly decrease his contributions because no one could match his donations.
At his wits end, Bruce hires a team of accounts to search through every crinkle and crevice of tax law to find what loopholes or shortcuts can be avoided in order to pay his damn taxes to the MAX.
The results are horrifying. According to the strictest definition of the law, the government owes him money.
Bruce burns the report, buries any evidence as deeply as he can, and organizes a foundation to lobby for FAR higher taxation of the upper class.
All this, and Wayne Enterprises is happily chugging along, churning profit, expanding into new markets, growing in the stock market, and trying to force the credit and proportionate compensation on their increasingly horrified CEO.
Bruce Wayne is one of the richest men in the world. Bruce Wayne will never not be one of the richest men in the world.
But by GOD is he trying.
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tiredofsatansbullshit · 14 hours
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tiredofsatansbullshit · 14 hours
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after patrolling, unwinding in a diner somewhere ...
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throw the man a bone batman geez
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tiredofsatansbullshit · 14 hours
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I love how the best versions of Batman are the Lego version, an emo nerd and the one from the animated series
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tiredofsatansbullshit · 14 hours
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exactly
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tiredofsatansbullshit · 14 hours
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what is very annoying about the vast majority of batfam fans is the very surface level approach they take towards calling out racism in dc canon and fandom. yes, you want damian to be brown in the comics but do you care about how his mother’s character was butchered due to post 9/11 anti-arab racism? yes, you want cass and duke to be featured more prominently in comics but would you be okay with them displacing your own faves in order to do so? do you even read the comics they ARE featured in, or are you content with just reblogging their one panel cameos from your fave’s solos, extolling how much you “love” them (so long as they are second fiddle, that is)? you want jason or dick (whichever you prefer) to co-parent lian, all the while sidelining jade - you are content relegating jade and talia and shado and shiva to a joking “assassin moms” punchline when you talk about their kids while not realising the implications of their race and how it plays into their portrayal by dc.
you can’t just reblog a vague post about colouring damian correctly and wanting representation and then uncritically reblog another post about how evil his mother is - you’re playing into the exact same racism you claim to denounce, while feeling like you’re being so very progressive while doing it. it’s not like i’m expressing a particularly novel sentiment either, and i’m aware i probably sound like a broken record right now but it’s just so irritating
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tiredofsatansbullshit · 14 hours
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sorry i can't come in to work today. yeah sorry they killed me off last night. yeah i just wasn't relevant to the plot anymore. i should be in tomorrow but i'll let you know.
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tiredofsatansbullshit · 14 hours
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Tim comes out to the world by posting a picture of Bernard on his insta tagged #boyfriend that immediately goes viral, but not because of the reasons Tim thought about, but because is such a good picture of Bernard every single comment is asking for his @
Tim regrets everything.
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tiredofsatansbullshit · 14 hours
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Battinson’s toothpick ass would lose his mind over Clark’s farm-grown alien titties
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tiredofsatansbullshit · 14 hours
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i think everyone needs to adopt "i didnt say it was good, i said i liked it" into their vocabulary right now. it did me wonders
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tiredofsatansbullshit · 14 hours
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Batman: I don’t kill. It’s wrong.
Batman three minutes later putting on spiked brass knuckles: anyway did I ever tell you about how Superman is a much better person than me?
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tiredofsatansbullshit · 17 hours
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tiredofsatansbullshit · 17 hours
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“but i’m not [insert minority group] so it’s not my place to talk about [issue]” is quickly becoming one of my most hated sentiments. if something is fucked up then speak on it. if you’re overstepping someone will tell you and then all you have to do is acknowledge it, apologize, and move on.
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tiredofsatansbullshit · 17 hours
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the gifs i find on this website... you guys are art curators
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word gets around gotham (somehow, some way) that the Bats all know a variety of rare or difficult languages, including several varieties of sign language.
the Gotham PD language line/translation services are woefully underfunded and never show up on time on a good day.
cue an enterprising sergeant on night desk duty routinely using Gordon’s bat signal to put out a request for language services in the middle of the night.
the kicker? Batman or one of his kids usually — sometimes — shows up. more frequently than the actual services, at least.
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