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emeritusemeritus · 8 months

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Turn back the hands of time. [Weasley twins x Reader]

Title: Turn back the hands of time.

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Reader, (George Weasley x Reader later)

Timeline: Set six months after Fred’s Death.

Summary: What if you got the gift of time just to relive a moment with your deceased beloved one more time?

Warnings: Fred does the big sleep. Death. Grief, tears, emotional trauma. Use of a time turner (setting my own rules here). Mentions of marriage and kids. So much pain. McGonagall being a queen. Reader is implied Gryffindor.

I apologise, this one hurts. 🥀

The six months that had passed since the love of your life died had been the most intolerable, excruciating months of your life. Nothing brought you comfort anymore; every single thing in your life was attached to memories of him, bittersweet and painful memories you were forced to relive each and everyday by simply existing. Each day from the second you woke you were reminded of the painful fact that you had to carry on living whilst he couldn't. There was no future for you anymore, no more dreams of small weddings and long honeymoons, no blessings of little ones or fantasies of being an author, holed up in a small little cabin hidden away in the forest like you'd always planned with Fred.

He would aparate into the shop each day and you would have a home office with a big, fancy writing desk placed directly in front of a large window to view the scenery around you as you wrote. After closing the shop and settling up for the night, Fred would return home and you'd cook together, spending evenings on the decking under twinkling lights as you appreciated your simple life. You'd had it all planned out in fine detail, the future you were no longer destined to have.

George was naturally devastated too, utterly broken by the loss of his twin brother. You two, being the closest people to Fred, had found just a smidge of comfort in each other initially but over time Fred's loss had built a wedge between you both, each of you only serving as a reminder of what you had both lost.

You'd not only lost your soulmate but also your best friend along the way and the family that had taken you in and loved you as one of their own.

You'd pulled away from them all the same week of Fred's funeral, finding it unfathomably hard to be around them all, the missing piece constantly highlighted in the sea of familiar red hair.

A good day for you these days meant accomplishing something as mundane as showering or eating some sort of meal. You knew you'd lost weight, the clothes you always wore hung off your body now the same way Fred's clothes used to. But you couldn't seem to stomach anything, the lingering pain and grief creating a sickness in you that couldn't be soothed.

The pain never truly ever left you but it did come in waves. Most the time is was like a background noise, a constant humming that ran through you like a curse but sometimes it was panic inducing pain, taking away your ability to breathe and function as haunting sobs wracked your body until you were crippled with agony, regret and hopeless longing.

You'd had a good day, as far as they went, managing to crawl out of bed and into the shower before trying to distract yourself with some muggle tv when a simple letter, delivered by owl, took your breath away once more.

Dear y/n,

I hope this letter finds you well, my thoughts have been with you each and every day since the battle. In Dumbledore's honour, we are conducting a memorial for the fallen and I would like to personally invite you to celebrate in the life of the loved ones we have lost. Fred's life will be celebrated by his staff, friends, family and fellow students as we pay respect to their bravery and sacrifice.

I would be honoured if you would join us.

With profound sympathy,

Minerva Mcgonagall.

You couldn't breathe again, tears streaming down your face as you read the letter through misty eyes, having to blink away the tears constantly to refocus your vision.

You didn't want to go. Your initial instinct was to burn the letter and hide from it, isolating yourself further and further until no one of your past life could ever find you again, lest contact you by owl. But you couldn't do that to Fred. He deserved everyone he loved and that loved him to celebrate his life, to tell stories of his triumphs and notorious endeavours in his time at Hogwarts. You couldn't be selfish this time, not for your Fred.

——

As you stepped into the all too familiar castle alone, you felt a dichotomy of feelings barrage you all at once. This had been your home since you were 11 years old, the place where you finally had a sense of belonging, where your best memories had been made, the place that you had met and fell in love with Fred Weasley and the place he'd died.

The castle had undergone extensive repairs and looked better than ever since the destruction from the war. Walking through the halls you felt both soothed and conflicted, the trembling of your hands never once leaving as you anticipated seeing everyone again.

"Y/n/n?" A familiar voice called from behind you, making your eyes close momentarily from the pain in their voice. You turned to see Ginny stood there, staring at you with a worried look on her face. She looked well, pretty, in sharp contrast to you.

"How?" She began to say as she walked towards you, thinking better of the statement before throwing her arms around you, "I'm so glad you're here."

You hummed a reply, already feeling an invisible weight tugging at you as you held your friend, the sister in law you'd once anticipated.

"Everyone's through here," she says, taking you by the hand as she led you towards the great hall, before you could protest. Your stomach roiled with nerves as you tried to keep your eyes down, not ready to see everyone again.

"Y/n?" A voice called out, the tone of shock and worry so intricately laced in the maternal tone it was hard to hear it. Molly. You raised your eyes just in time to see her move quickly towards you and embrace you tightly, the all too familiar smell of her and their home encasing you entirely. You bit your lip hard to stop the tears from falling, already succumbing to your overwhelming emotions as hard as you tried to deny them. Each Weasley took the time to give you a warm hug, even Arthur who had cradled you in his arms surprisingly tight.

When the last hug didn't come, you looked up with tear stricken eyes towards the body that had made no effort to walk towards you, George. He looked just as haunted as you, tired and frail as he looked upon you with sad eyes, tears silently falling down his face. You stared at each other for a moment, unsure of how to proceed until your lip quivered and a small sob escaped you. George rushed forward and pulled you straight into his chest, neither of you caring about the tears and sobs that fell from you both, too fixed upon each other to give a single care about the onlookers.

"I'm so sorry," you both said at exactly the same time, earning a little chuckle from you both at the ridiculousness of it all.

You and George never left each others side the entire time, clutching hold of each other's hand as you navigated the painful memories and eulogies, each giving a squeeze intermittently to let the other know that you were still there.

Mcgonagall had called you away some time before the official memorial had began, walking with you towards the office she now held that was once Dumbledore's. George had reluctantly dropped your hand with a quiet, frantic whisper that you'd better be back soon.

"It's good to see you y/n," she says, gesturing for you to step towards the desk. You'd always felt a kinship with you previous head of house, both of you having a flair for transfiguration and underneath the sometimes harsh exterior, she had a wicked sense of humour.

"You too professor," you replied, trying to force an honest smile onto your face, not having used those muscles in months.

"Oh professor," she laughs, "call me Minerva," you says, scandalised at the notion of you calling her professor. You smiled warmly, this time not having to force the smile, feeling surprisingly comforted by her.

"You know, I always knew you and Mr Weasley would become an item, right from the day he turned your water goblet into a rock," she smiled, taking her seat as she gazed up at you fondly, "I am so sorry for your loss."

You chuckled at the memory, for once not feeling complete anguish at the thoughts of you and Fred. It was your first transfiguration class and you'd been tasked with turning your pets into water goblets as every first year is expected to do. You'd succeeded first try and Fred had then turned said water goblet into a small rock before your very eyes. To his surprise you had barked out a laugh instead of cursing him out for the ridiculous prank and you'd been firm friends with both the twins ever since. Only in your third year did you begin to catch real feelings for him and by your fourth year you were completely smitten. Before fifth year began, just before the Weasley's trip to Egypt, you were officially dating, finally saying I love you and the rest was history, never parting from each other once you'd found your person. You'd attended the yule ball together, been hand in hand for every task, even as the twins gambled their way through the games. You'd spent hours upon hours inventing, perfecting and packaging their inventions with them and had been been included every step of the way in designing and opening the store. You smiled in pure nostalgia as Mcgonagall's comment triggers a pool of memories for you.

"I've never told anyone this, except for Albus, but when I was a young woman, I lost the love of my life too," she says, bringing you back to the present. You look at her with a sympathetic look though with wide eyes, shocked by her revelation. "He didn't die so it's not exactly the same but he might as well have." Her eyes begin to cloud over as you can see painful memories coming to the forefront of her mind.

"I was a much younger woman then, having graduated from Hogwarts and securing a position in the ministry, the department of magical law enforcement. Before I left for London, I returned home and met a local farm boy, a muggle. Fred Weasley reminded me a great deal of him, perhaps that's why his passing has been so hard for me aswell. He was handsome, clever and so terribly quick witted he even gave me a run my money".

You huffed out a little laugh, knowing how fierce and funny she could be underneath the professional exterior. She sent you a warm smile as you listened intently to her story.

"He proposed not long after our whirlwind summer, right in the middle of a ploughed field owned by his father. I didn't hesitate for a second and said yes straight away, blindsided by love. After I'd accepted, I realised that the future I would be creating for myself would cut me off from the Wizarding world completely, just as my mother had when she married my father. I realised I couldn't live a life the only place I felt like I belonged, having to lock my wand away for ever, unhappily drifting through a life in which I'd rejected the gift I'd been given. Three days later I left for London alone though I never stopped loving Dougal."

"What happened to him?" You asked quietly, not wanting to upset her. She sighed in return, looking down at the desk.

"My mother informed me years later that he married the daughter of another farm owner in Caithness, I never heard anything else after that."

"I'm so sorry Minerva," you said honestly, feeling a tightness in your chest at hearing her story. Truthfully it had been your own form of distraction from your own pain and you were immensely thankful for that.

She sent you a sad smile, nodding her head gently as she looked up at you.

"You're probably wondering why I told you all of this," she says with a smile. Before you can protest, she raises her hand warmly like a mother would and smiled, "I have two points to sharing this personal story with you. The first, is that time truly does heal wounds. You may feel as if you will never be rid of this pain, not knowing how to go on or feeling as if you don't want to, and that my dear is perfectly understandable but every month will get easier, every year you will begin to feel less pain and more pleasant nostalgia until you find a version of yourself that had bloomed from the pain."

Your eyes had filled with tears again at her kind words. Something in her tone made you truly believe that this was true and that you did have a chance of healing eventually, but nothing was comforting enough to immediately relieve the pain, nor set your mind at ease.

"The second, is a gift of sorts," she says, reaching into the top drawer of her desk which she unlocks with a wave of her wand. You frowned gently, not knowing how to respond as she pulls out a little wooden box. She casts another spell and the box opens with an intricate unravelling of the wooden box.

Your breath catches in your throat at you recognise the contents immediately; the time turner that Hermione had been given by Dumbledore all those years ago.

"I'm sure you remember this, as I believe yourself and miss Granger made excellent use of this in your third and fifth respective years." You could do nothing but nod, overwhelmed at the sudden implication of the possibilities of the gift.

"As you know, nothing can be altered by reversing the time, everything will always happened exactly as it always had. I know how tempting it could be to try and fix the projection of our lives, but consider this a gentle warning as to why it is not practical to do so," she says, handing you the time turner. You feel the cold, heavy weight of the time piece in your palm as you inspect it, remembering every detail.

"I always wish I'd gotten more time with Dougal, even just to relive a singular moment or to see him one last time but I was never brave enough, never wanting to jeopardise how far I'd come in my healing. But for you, the gift of time could be invaluable."

You began to cry silently, tears unable to be held back any longer at her kind gesture.

"Thank you, so much," you said through the tears, struggling to hold back your sobs. She immediately stood and moved to wrap her arms around your shoulders, her cape falling over you as if she was protecting you entirely.

"You always were one of my very favourite students," she says, rubbing your shoulder. "Despite the trouble, the mischief was usually rather funny," she admitted. Both of you laughed for a moment at her words, your free hand coming up to wipe at your eyes.

"If I were you, I'd chose a memory that you weren't originally around for, you'll get more time with him. Unless you want to watch from afar," she says, straightening herself out, though keeping a firm hand on your shoulder.

You wracked your brain for a time that you weren't around Fred, finding it hard to think of any specifics. Showing up randomly at the burrow would only pose deep, unanswerable questions that you couldn't explain, everything had to fit to the exact projection of exactly what had happened.

A vague memory of Harry popped into your mind, a tale he'd told about the twins that had been endearing to say the least. You remembered him telling you about seeing Fred and George comforting a young boy in the courtyard that had been victim to Umbridge's unorthodox punishments whilst you were in detention with Snape. Perfect. There was no chance of you accidentally showing up, knowing that you'd gone straight to the common room after that particular detention and it wouldn't interrupt the greater timeline.

You closed your eyes and estimated how many turns you'd need, settling on a little over three full turns, praying it would be enough as you fixated on a certain point.

Immediately your sense of space and time began to shift as you broke through whatever dimension you were entering as the time turner rumbled in your hand.

You were immediately met by the sight of Snape's classroom door which was thankfully sealed shut. You ran immediately out to the courtyard, desperation and adrenaline coursing through your body as you fought to get to your destination quickly, not knowing how much time you'd have.

Your knees nearly buckled upon hearing hushed whispers around the corner from you, tucked away in one of the corridors.

"It's not as bad as it seems, see, it's fading already."

"You can hardly see ours anymore and the pain stops eventually,"

"Yeah."

You walk around the corner and your lip instantly quivers at seeing him. You had to act strong, be strong for him so he wouldn't worry, knowing you couldn’t change the trajectory of time but it was so hard.

He was crouched on the floor beside the stone bench where the young boy sat sobbing with George sat next to him trying to comfort the sad boy, showing him his own scars on the back of his hand.

Fred's hair was a little longer than it had been when he died, something that you had always loved on him, secretly preferring when his hair looked a little overgrown and shaggy. He wore a blue striped polo shirt with a mustard yellow long sleeve shirt underneath and his dark trousers, all of which complemented him so well. In the time between the current events and his death, you'd rarely seen him wear anything other than a fancy suit when he worked at the shop or a simple pair of sweatpants when he got home, usually exhausted. It was so refreshing to see him look so perfectly Fred, reminding you of the boy you'd fallen hopelessly in love with all those years ago.

George also looked great, wearing a matching outfit with contrasting colours that complimented him just as well. He looked well and happy and you had to hold back another quiver of your lip at seeing the boy you loved like your own brother be so different to how you knew him now.

Fred noticed you almost immediately as you walked around the corner, stood silently observing him beside the stone pillar and the wickedly playful grin spread all over his face upon seeing you. He sprang up from his crouched position and raised his eyebrows at you in surprise.

You immediately flung yourself into his arms and he caught you seamlessly with a little 'oof' at the sudden impact. Your eyes filled with the tears you were trying so hard to stop as the familiarity and comfort of being in his arms surrounded you. Nothing felt like this. You fit so perfectly into his arms that he had once mentioned that your body must have been moulded from his own, your head resting perfectly on his chest, directly over his beating heart. His scent surrounded you like a delicious fog, the familiar scents of sweet marshmallow and dark notes of whiz bang smoke clung to your nostrils as you took deep breaths in trying to fill your body with his scent so that you'd always remember.

You felt like you could finally breathe again, finally home where you belonged.

His arms had locked around your shoulders, keeping you firmly against his body, no doubt sensing your need for him in that moment. His hand played with the strands of your hair as he bent down to kiss the top of your head.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong?" He asks quietly, only loud enough for you to hear, considering you still had an audience. Hearing him address you, calling you sweetheart had your world shattering and you could no longer stop the tears from falling down your face.

"F-Fred?" You said with a shaky breath, trying desperately to hold back the sobs that built up within your body.

"I'm here, I'm right here," he said soothingly, rocking you both back and forth gently as he pressed another kiss to your head.

"What's happened? Did Snape do something? Umbridge?" He says, pulling you back slightly so that he can look you in the eye, his worry clearly evident on his face, the protective side of him coming out as he considered that someone had hurt you.

You shook your head quickly, knowing you couldn't say anything that would work as an excuse.

"No, I just, I just needed to see you," you said honestly, the innocence and the weight of your words tugging at your heart, knowing he would never know how much you meant it.

His brown pulled together quickly in a slight frown before it disappeared off his face as he reached up to brush a strand of hair behind your ear.

You tried to push away all the intrusive thoughts that plagued your mind, things that only propelled you to feeling sadder, things you wanted to tell him and all the things you missed about him but you couldn't.

"I love you Freddie," you said, looking directly into his eyes, watching as they sparkled and an honest smile pulled at his lips.

"Not as much as I love you sweetheart," he replied, pulling you in for another hug, though this one was more playful as he squeezed you, making a laugh erupt from your mouth.

You suddenly pulled away and looked towards George who looked on in equal parts confusion and worry. The young boy had gone, no doubt feeling awkward about the whole interaction, leaving you with just the twins.

You broke away from Fred and moved towards George who stood instinctively as you approached him. You threw your arms around his neck and he fumbled awkwardly for a moment before moving his hands to wrap around you, holding you to him.

"I love you Georgie," you said. He chuckled against you.

"What the bloody hell happened in that potions room?" He jokes but suddenly squeezes you tighter and replies that he loves you too.

"Trying to steal my woman brother?" Fred says from beside us, his tone just as joking and playful as you'll always remember it to be.

"Maybe, I am the better looking one after all," George jokes as you slip out of his hold.

"My future wife disagrees, don't you sweetheart," Fred says, pulling you back over to his side.

You felt your heart shatter at his words and you tried desperately to act neutral under the circumstances, knowing that he had referred to you that way since fifth year. It had always filled you with pride and giddiness each and every time he would call you his future wife, the butterflies in your tummy fluttering wildly at his determination to marry you.

Somehow you found your strength and like magic you slipped into the moment, casting all thoughts aside as you spent your time wisely.

"Sorry George," you smirked, turning back to face Fred to really look at him, knowing that your time would soon be up.

"You think I'll make a good wife?" You ask Fred, who beams down at you with a smile as he slips his arm around you again.

"The best, only one I'll ever need," he smirks, his hand wandering on your waist to reach down and pat your bum.

"I'd do anything to marry you," you said, your voice breaking slightly towards the end as your emotions overcame you once again at the deeper, more painful meaning of your words.

"I have to go," you said to Fred, knowing that you couldn't linger around much longer. "Don't mention this again please, I don't want Snape to know I snuck out of detention," you lied. He nodded in understanding and you moved forward to give him a kiss, pouring your heart and soul into it as you clutched onto to the collar of his polo shirt, his arms wrapped tightly around your waist.

"I think you should get detention with Snape more often," he says, still holding you tightly to him. You laugh and nod enthusiastically as you spend your last moments really looking at him, trying to commit every inch of his skin to memory.

The little scar above his eyebrow, the mark on his nose, the curve and little bump on the bridge of his nose, the way his hair shaped his face perfectly.

His greeny brown eyes, always glittering with mischief, that's what you'd always remember of him.

"Bye Freddie, I love you" you said, barely able to contain your tears as you walked quickly away, hiding around the corner as you started to sob. You flicked the time turner back just the right amount and tolu felt yourself once again being pulled in every direction until you landed back in McGonagall’s office.

She’s still sat at the desk, signing some papers when you return and she offers you a kind smile, seeing your tear stained cheeks.

“Thank you,” you said, owing her all the gratitude in the world for gifting you the opportunity to see your beloved once again as you placed the time turner delicately back in the box on the table. She nodded warmly and smiled again.

“It’ll be here for you whenever you need it,”

She says, placing it back into the drawer desk, “now, shall we begin the ceremony?” She stands and gestures for you to join her and you do, already feeling stronger by the minute, like your brief visit with Fred had recharged you and given you enough strength to continue.

George slipped his hand into yours the second you were reunited, both of you sitting together as Mcgonagall lead the remembrance ceremony. It was hard to hear Fred’s name and the memories of him shared around the room, but you’d found a strength you didn’t know you had. You cried, you laughed and you celebrated him in every way you could, in the way that he had always deserved.

Epilogue

As the years drew on, you’d visited McGonagall’s office numerous times to visit Fred as it were, only doing so when you felt you desperately needed to, which happened to be less and less over the years as you found your strength. Sometimes you watched from afar as you both interacted, seeing the love between you and sometimes you intercepted memories so that you could interact with him, smell him and feel his skin against yours.

You never dated, feeling no pull or desire for another man in your life, never able to commit to anyone else, knowing that they would always come second to your true love. George had become something to you which you could never explain, a love of sorts which teetered between friendship and more, though it was hard to cross that line, knowing that anything you did would be irreversible. Years passed with you both stuck in limbo, until one day the line was crossed and you found no guilt or pain on the other side of the line but instead found comfort and love. You’d moved in together to a little cabin in the woods, the dream that you’d once had with Fred that George fulfilled for you and one sadness filled night had changed everything when you both sought comfort in each other, needing to feel like you weren’t alone anymore.

It was a natural progression to love George, and you both found that the only way of moving past your pain was to accept that Fred would always be the other half to both of you, with the rest completely dedicated to each other. You both knew you were the only ones that would be able to have this together, that somehow the gap left by Fred would remain but it would be comfortable, like an additional blessing to your relationship. No deciding between the two, no competition and no guilt at loving both.

You married a year after moving in together and you were happy, finally a Weasley just like you’d always wanted. You’d expected to be conflicted and initially you had been, but you and George were perfect for each other and you started a new life together, always keeping Fred in your hearts but finally putting yourselves and your relationship first.

When your first son arrived not a year after your wedding, you’d both cried tears of utter joy when he was born with fiery red hair and little freckles, a complete clone of both his daddy and his uncle Fred.

You didn’t name him after Fred, nor Gred or Forge as George had somewhat jokingly suggested throughout your pregnancy, but instead chose to give him his own name, letting him forge own legacy in this calm world, one where he would always know about his uncle Freddie and how he died a hero.

#emeritusemeritus #harry potter #fred weasley #fred weasley x you #emeritusemerituswrites #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley masterlist #george weasley x you #george weasley #George Weasley x reader #angst #Fred Weasley angst #weasley twins x you #george weasley imagines #weasley twins masterlist

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sonic-adventure-3 · 8 months

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idw “after all, if he can’t be forgiven, can you?” that was soooo fucked up of sonic dude. i always think abt that. that whole scene where sonic lures shadow away and emotionally manipulates him to stop him from trying to kill mr tinker was so fucked of sonic. i kinda loved it. manipulate is a strong word but i do think it applies to what he was doing there. he was scrambling to find an angle that’d disarm shadow and the way HE SMIRKED WHEN HE FOUND ITTTTT.

like he was fully taking advantage of shadow’s genuine remorse and trauma there. the arguments he makes suck under examination but they’re uniquely effective on one shadow the hedgehog.

“eggman has helped in certain scenarios, like the ark incident (that he also mostly caused)” bad argument and he knows it, specifically mentioning the ark

-> “eggman fought with us and was crucial in defending the planet in the black arms incident” extremely generous reading of eggman’s actions there, he was mainly just after the chaos emeralds like usual and really only defending himself and his interests, again bringing up shadow’s past and origins

-> “if he [a megalomaniac who has very intentionally tried to kill me and ravage the world so he can rule it many many multiple times despite having literally every other choice available, now amnesiac] can’t be forgiven [for trying to end me and the world for funsies], can you [be forgiven for trying to kill me and end the world in a haze of grief induced from having your memories altered and just (because you just woke up from a 50 year nap) having witnessed your best/only friend and sister killed in front of your eyes (which you are the cause of, for existing)]?” such a false equivalency, but one that shadow is predisposed to believe in cause he’s just had his past dredged up in his head again a few lines ago, and feels wayyy guiltier about his whole deal than he actually is for the part he played and the circumstances he was in. sonic’s using his own insecurity against himmmmmmmm.

suuuuuuch a dick move. tbf i don’t interpret sonic as having intentionally or cruelly been thinking all that, i just think the only thing on his mind was winning. like when shadow realized sonic was luring him away, sonic was just like “uh yeah? cause i needed you to not kill that guy and you can’t kill him when you’re not there”

man i just really like that for him. (not completely intentional) manipulatory tendencies. cause if you can say words that make you win, say them, and say them quick. fuck man. like i’m not 100% in on this interpretation but like it’s really fucking interesting isn’t it?

#idwposting #rambles #shadow #sonic

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kingmagnificoofrosas · 2 months

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The way she completely ignored his emotional state right there ... who wouldn't at least stop in their tracks and be like "Are you ok? What's wrong?" Doesn't she notice his expression? I mean, she just entered the room, you cannot tell me she didn't see his panic reaction.

Also, again, not one.single.touch. NOTHING! She walks around him as if he's a tree.

She's all 🤩 while he is literally 😰

"Oh your magic blah blah blah ... magic magic magic, mimimimi!"

What would have been the right way!

"Oh, honey! You're just too kind! Pampering us all with your magic and- *takes notice of his expression* Are you alright? 😟 What's wrong?" And along this, put her hands on his arm lovingly, offering both support with words and physical touch!

But no. 😑

Magnifico is a VERY expressive person. Each emotion is displayed on his face. He cannot hide what he's feeling. It's impossible to not notice his mood, except you're an ignorant dumbnut!

It's always only ever "Oh, your magic is amazing! Your abilities are amazing!" It's never "Oh, you are amazing! You're wonderful for all you do! You do so much, thank you for being so selfless and devoted! Thank you for trying so hard, we appreciate you!"

All that's coming from everyone around Magnifico is "Me me me! My wish, my feelings, my wants and needs, me me me! I want, want, want!"

Magnifico has always looked at others and cared for others! His sole purpose to rule and have his kingdom was so others could be safe, happy and content. The sole reason he even brought the whole "wish taking and granting" thing to life was for others, not himself! He wanted others to be safe at all costs! Set aside his trauma induced paranoia and anxiety.

The way everyone acted .... urgh! Egoistical, ignorant shit behavior is what it is! Shame on them all! Shame on Amaya and shame on every citizen of Rosas. They all don't deserve him.

Ungrateful, selfish bunch of ignorant dumbnuts!

And HER!!!! Got a wish granted! 1 day later sees her king distressed yet has the audacity to ask for ANOTHER wish to be granted!!

And then after his fall proceeds to mock him! Ew! That is so off the chards rude and low! Big Yikes!

#king magnifico #disney wish #wish 2023 #the citizens of Rosas give me the biggest ick!

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dc418writes · 2 days

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✨Pairing✨: felon!Ari Levinsonxblack!reader

Summary🪄: Surprisingly, you’re Ari’s first stop when he gets out of prison

🚨: 18+ NO MINORS!! Ari (first and foremost because hello☝🏾lol), angst, talks of prison, allusion to violence (male-male), allusion to childhood trauma, a few bad language words, unprotected happy adult fun times (everyone please be safe!)

A/N🎤: Hi! So this is my entry for the Cum Together Extravaganza created by the amazing, talented, wonderful, whore-mone inducing @stargazingfangirl18 and @labella420 lol, and I hope everyone enjoys☺️! *This idea is loosely based off Nicolas Cage’s character from Con Air (if you know you know✨)

*DISCLAIMER!: although visual was created by me via Canva, I DO NOT CLAIM OWNERSHIP of pictures used as they were all found via Pinterest*

Prompt: Pining + Running into each other after a long time apart + Frantic Kisses

His heavy boots stop just a foot or two away from the familiar steps he’d climbed plenty of times before. A mix of emotions swirling through his brain causing a tightness in his chest.

He shouldn’t be here.

Not after he’d all but physically pushed you out the visitation room that day. A common tactic of self sabotage he developed over the years, along with his way of trying to protect you from the eventual hurt he knew he’d put you through.

You were so angelic that day. Your natural glow competing with the sun outside shining through the window against your soft skin seemingly made of gold. Brown eyes full of worry, yet still holding that sparkle Ari had never experienced from anyone before. This wasn’t a place for you to be. A place that would soon tarnish your purity - so white the freshest snow, having fallen directly from the sky above, seemed dirty.

“You’re hurt,” you stated wanting so badly to reach out and try to do something for the blue and purple bruise on his cheek. To clean the dried blood around the stitch in his right eyebrow, but you keep your hands to yourself following the strict “no touching” rule.

He only shrugged. Clearly uncaring of whatever happened, but there was also a dimness to his spirit.

Since your first meeting, you could tell there was something hidden behind the walls he’d built. Sense a complicated past before he felt comfortable enough to tell you some of what he’d gone through. However this was different. Past the point of reverting back to the old Ari that was known as a troubled, aloof hermit, it’s almost as if this was a completely different man.

“I uh wanted to bring you cookies, but the officer said no,” you started again, trying to change the subject since Ari wouldn’t tell you what happened. “Something about possible contraband smuggling? As if I could sneak something in a small cookie. Plus it’s me of all people! Where would I even get-,”

“Don’t come back here,” he finally spoke in that gruff voice. It takes you back at first, lightly chuckling to yourself thinking he was joking. His serious eyes - somewhat dark and with new adjoining bags from his lack of sleep - tell you otherwise quickly causing a furrow to your brows.

“Wha-What do you mean-?”

“You don’t need to be waiting for me. Just…leave.”

“B-But I love you Ari.”

He shakes his head before standing to his feet. “We’re done,” he calls over his shoulder as he reaches the metal door. Whoever was in charge apparently heard him from the pad shining green to grant him entrance back to the waiting hall where another officer met him to reapply his cuffs and escort him to his cell.

All the while ignoring your cries of his name and how you pleaded for him to talk to you.

But later that night, staring at the discolored white ceiling as he lied in his top bunk on an uncomfortable, lumpy mattress, it’s all he could hear. Those same tears that ran down your cheeks now silently running down his.

“Fuck,” he silently curses to himself while his fingers pass through his almond strands as he turns away - now hyper aware of how strange he probably looked to your neighbors just standing in your yard. He should’ve just gone to the halfway house he’d been recommended from the transfer counselor.

Try to stay far from you and this part of town for that matter.

He was slowly realizing though, that the heart he thought was closed off desperately craved attention only you could give. Only wanted your warm touch and smile that soothed a childhood ache he’d long suppressed.

Just as he moves to descend your stone path, the front door creaks open to staccato taps on your wooden porch. There’s a continuous clink of metal followed by excited barks as the black dachshund runs down the steps and around Ari’s feet.

“Barry! You can’t run-”

Beautiful as a painting in a museum, there you stood in your cut off jean shorts and some older looking shirt. Your hair much shorter than the last time he saw you eight years ago, but the pixie cut only brought more attention to your gorgeous face and adorable cheeks.

Other than that, it’s as if you hadn’t aged a day.

“A-Ari?,” you stammer stepping further out onto your porch.

He has to clear his throat to get rid of the nerves blocking his words from escaping. “I…I’m sorry for just showin’ up like this. Would’ve called, but when they gave me my phone back it was dead.”

“So..you’re out?”

“Yea,” he softly smiles. You don’t return it though looking as if you’d seen a ghost while staying planted on the top step. Even Barry had returned back to your side, circling a couple times until he felt comfortable enough to lie down. “This was a mistake. Clearly she doesn’t want you here.”

“I’ll uh leave then,” Ari says nervously scratching the back of his neck after a long - and awkward enough - moment of silence between you two. “I didn’t mean to bother-”

Before he can finish, you’re running down the steps - not caring of the dirt and grass on your bare feet. He’s prepared for your deserved anger, whether that be yelling, shoves, or even punches. Instead, your fists clasp the front of his shirt as you pull him down to meet your lips.

After years apart his hands still automatically find their usual place on your body bringing you closer. Ari’s right on the side of your neck, tilting your chin however he needed to gain the access to your mouth he missed, while his left dragged from your hip to the middle of your back holding you to him.

Your moan hitting him in a deep, long ignored place that has him embarrassed like a teenage boy how fast his blood runs southward.

The need for air has you both begrudgingly parting, while your foreheads stay connected. “I’m sorry..for everything,” he whispers letting his thumb graze along your petal soft bottom lip. It’s as if he thinks you’ll break he’s so gentle - like it’s a fragile piece of artwork he dared touch.

"I didn't-"

"Shh," you reply leaning up to peck his lips once more. "Later."

Your lips barely separate journeying the short distance from your front door to your bedroom. Both of them red and swollen, yet neither of you attempt to stop as your back hits the light blue comforter - fluffy and soft as a cloud.

His hands grip your thighs curling along his sides, yet fail to move where you need them most making you whimper as his mouth slides to your neck. Taking matters into your own hands, you pull his shirt over his muscled back - silently giggling to yourself and filling with a sense of pride hearing his pleasured groan as your nails rake against his warm skin.

They’re set for his buckle next, but Ari’s quick to use his rougher and stronger ones to pin on either side of your head. “Ari please,” you whine eagerly trying to grind your hips so your soaking core can get some type of relief. You know he’s desperate for something too briefly nudging the tent formed in front of his pants.

“I know, I know.” He unsuccessfully tries to kiss the pout from your lips. “I..I wanna take my time tonight. It’s been eight years sweetheart.”

The deprived and needy part of you wants to counter, urging him for the opposite since it’s been so long. Instead, you nod letting him completely take control.

Slowly, he helps remove your clothes before open mouth kisses and taps of his tongue flow down from your neck and across your heaving chest to your stomach. You moan arching your back to lift your breasts closer to his face when he returns there taking his time attacking one nipple with his tongue while the other is groped and plucked in his free hand.

By the time he finally reaches your waiting and wet core, it only takes one lick and your sweet release is covering his beard.

“S-Sorry,” you stammer feeling your skin heat even more from shame not wanting that to happen so quickly.

“Sorry?,” he softly chuckles before leaving a kiss on your mound. “That’s what’s supposed to happen.”

The sound nearly has you in tears knowing your Ari was back. The one you knew loved you just as much as you loved him.

Having had a taste after going so long without, he can’t wait for more switching between his skillful tongue and fingers until your juices flow again, His mouth attached to you; greedily slurping everything you could give him. Your fingers are seemingly locked in his hair as he rises enough to remove his pants. Grunting as he grabs the base - past the point of painfully hard - to direct himself inside you.

“Fuck,” he moans into your neck feeling you rapidly pulse around him. So warm and tight he has to restrain himself from taking you like a wild animal.

Not that you would mind.

“M’not gonna last baby.”

“Spose to happen,” you slur clutching around him urging him to move.

His hand tightly pinning your hip to the bed, his thrusts start slow yet hard before gaining speed the closer he feels. Simultaneously, your cries of his name get louder as well while his mouth and tongue move along your neck and earlobe.

“Shit, I feel you right there baby come on. Come with me.” You can’t comprehend anything with your brain in this foggy, love drunk state, yet somehow your body complies when his thumb finds your swollen and throbbing nub squirting against his skin and down to the sheets below. “Mm good girl.”

His final pumps have you filled until no more can stay. A small mix of both your releases leaking from your hole with every surge of his hips until he’s drained.

Exhausted, he carefully tries to pull out but your whines have him stopping. Softly smiling to himself while slowly lowering until he’s comfortably laying on top of you. “Calm down I’m here.”

Soon your even breaths fill his ears and he’s able to lie on his side - gently moving you with him- to completely take in the area surrounding him. His fingertips mindlessly tracing along your thigh as he reacquaints himself to your bedroom. It was fitting for you in every way, from the light yellow of the walls to the books lining the shelves he built for you long ago. Your few stuffed animals in a wicker basket in the corner as if they were prepared for bed themselves.

Ari notices one in particular - a white bunny with long ears and pink bows he bought you during a trip to the store one day - on your dresser next to a framed picture you must’ve secretly took. He appeared to be taking a break from something dressed in a gray tee, dark jeans, and work-boots with his utility belt on his hips. A bottle of water in his hand lifted to his lips as he looked off somewhere in the distance. Now that he thought about it, he was watching a bird peck the ground trying to find bugs or seeds to eat.

And he looked so peaceful. So calm for once in his tormented life. He had you to thank for that being kind and willing enough to share your light when he fought so hard against it.

In the bit of moonlight peeking through the blinds, he can make out ‘Home’ in the corner of the picture causing the slightest curl to his lips as he holds you closer.

“You kept putting up with me,” he quietly speaks pecking your temple. “So patient even after everything. Know I’m never leavin you again sweetheart. I’m home for good.”

#CT 2024 raffle entry #ari levinson #ari levinson au #ari levinson x reader #ari levinson x black!reader #red sea diving resort #ari levinson x woc #chris evans #chris evans x black reader #chris evans x reader #chris evans x woc!reader #CT 2024 community extravaganza

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babyjakes · 5 months

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on the @sarah-writes-stucky situation.

(tw for this post: discussions of pedophilia/sexual depictions of minors, mentions of trauma.)

hey everyone. the discourse that unfolded regarding this interaction i had was very upsetting and anxiety-inducing for me, so i took the past few days to step away from tumblr and take care of myself. i'm returning now with a clearer head and feel i'm in a better place to speak on what's important to me. thanks for your patience, and here are my (sort of) abbreviated thoughts.

i feel obligated to start by saying that i understand and support anti-censorship and its basic principles. i get why outlawing forms of written speech is dangerous within a democracy. i recognize the need for spaces like ao3, and the important role they play in preserving free speech.

with all that being said, i don’t condone sexual depictions of minors and neither does tumblr. the point of this conflict (for me) has been that my work was taken and used to inspire conversations involving sexual depictions of minors, in a space/on a site where those themes are prohibited. tumblr is not ao3. tumblr has explicit rules prohibiting content involving "harm to minors":

"Don't post or solicit content that features the abuse of a minor, that includes suggestive or sexual content involving a minor or anyone that appears to be a minor, or that facilitates or promotes child sexual abuse. "Content" may include photos of real individuals, illustrations, animation, or text." [source]

this incident has not been a case of me being "very sensitive" about "mature themes." it's reasonable for me as a writer on tumblr to expect that my works won't be used to inspire depictions of harm to minors. any creator who wants to write themes as dark and controversial as smut involving minors should be aware of what spaces they're speaking in and the rules that apply to that space.

i want to say the biggest thank you to everyone who has spread awareness of the issue, spoken out about it, gone over to her page to hold her accountable, supported and been there for me, etc. it's been very upsetting to see the way she's been speaking to those confronting her. to anyone she has insulted, belittled, or hurt: i'm so sorry. you did not deserve that.

my takeaway has been that this person seriously lacks the social awareness and maturity needed to navigate complicated topics like this. it was interesting to watch her speak from an incredibly high horse about many different things, like her volunteer work (when my real-life job is in crisis response), her superior knowledge of psychology (when i just got accepted for a ba+ma program for psych), and her takes on trauma as apparently the only trauma survivor in the world (when... well... anyone who knows me knows what i could say here.) as far as i know, she's still going. and there's nothing i can do but let her.

i just wanted to thank some people i saw in real-time voicing their concerns and calling her out. i have so much gratitude and respect for you all. i'm so sorry for the way you were treated through all of this. (and apologies if i miss anyone, she has deleted replies on some posts and collecting names has been hard.)

@vellicore and @slvttyfied (i'm so sorry she made that post about you) @sgt-seabass @evansbby @brandycranby @boxofbonefics @ttyls @vase-of-lilies @buckets-and-trees @ladyobscurus @the-iceni-bitch @targaryenvampireslayer @fushic0re

#important #eun talks #sarah-writes-stucky

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starfishinthedistance · 1 year

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"Actually, liking things neat and tidy, and organizing stuff because you find it satisfying is OCPD not OCD-"

no no no NO NO NO shut up oh my god.

OCPD is a (usually trauma induced) mental illness where a person finds comfort in rigid patterns, perfectionism and self-imposed rules, and exterting control over everything they can, to the point of severe dysfunction and/or distress in their life. It comes with a lot of anxiety, troubles with relationships and extreme difficulty with school/work. It is painful to have and causes a lot of suffering, because it is a goddamn mental illness.

If you like organization or cleaning because it's satisfying and it doesn't cause you distress or dysfunction, you are a perfectionist or a neat person. You are not any mental illness. End of story.

For the love of GOD stop redirecting OCD stigma onto OCPD, especially when OCPD is so under researched and misunderstood, even by professionals.

-Someone with OCD who has seen enough of this shit

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ash-says · 1 month

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Saviour Complex Fever:

Let's address the saviour Complex today and no I am not talking here only in the romantic sense but also in platonic, familial,etc ways.

Ohh my traumatized girlies you better get your attention piqued up here cause this can be a call out or triggering post.

Speaking in my corporate babe language I am going to adopt both top to bottom and bottom to top approach to make sure you understand the problem. So without circumventing much I am going in for the goal.

1) Top to bottom Approach:

Starting with the OG," I can fix them" attitude.

Calm down babe, you can't. How about first fixing your sleep schedule for the starters?

We usually see this attitude being discussed a lot in the romantic hemisphere but I profoundly believe it plays a pivotal role in other bonds we have with people and tend to bleed into our romantic life so on and so forth.

Example: Take a child who is five years old and the parents are irresponsible. The child learns early on not only to look after itself but also acts as a therapist to his parents if one of them has zero sense of emotional boundaries and tends to trauma dump on the child. The child will look for ways in which he/she can make things easier and happier for the parent. In a way try to fix the parent and take on the role of being an adult.

How does it affect the bonds you create as an adult?

You become the mom friend.

The mama duck of the group who is always making sure everyone is taken care of properly.

You go above and beyond your comfort to help your friends out.

Take responsibility for your immediate surroundings.

Always trying to be the best and act like a saviour.

Last but not the least, people violate your boundaries time and time again but you forgive them and treat them like a child despite them being functioning adults.

So your homework is to assess your friendships, familial relationships, romantic relationships and check whether you are babysitting a adult?

If yes, are you getting paid for it enough?

No, drop the role.

2) Bottom to Top Approach:

Even the saviour dreams of being saved at times.

One of the potent reasons we tend to pick on the saviour role is because deep down we want to be saved. Salvation is what we desire.

Someone to lean on. A rock solid support. To lower our guards and be present without a worry.

Then we are faced with the harsh realities and realise it's not as simple as we think it is.

Therefore, whenever we see someone in need our instinct activates and we automatically start babysitting. We fill the void by embodying the persona that we deeply crave in our life.

It's the Chiron in us. We take on the role of the wounded healer.

That's where you need to remind yourself you don't need an external person or support to protect you. Many times we are sold this idea that we are fixed by someone else.

It's your job to fix your own house. Not your neighbours.

Your body, your mental health is where your spirit lives. Others can aid you but at the end of the day you won't be trusting your house to a total stranger. It's you who takes control and dictates the course of it.

So kill this idea that someone out there is going to walk into your life and then everything will be rainbows and roses.

Fine, if you believe life is a Disney movie you can go ahead and kiss a couple of frogs to find your prince charming. Your life, your rules.

But don't be surprised if you catch a disease or two while kissing the frogs .

After all, I always say:

There are no fucking saviours in real life. You are your own saviour, darling.

And if you do want to be a mother badly there are plenty of orphaned kids out there you can spend some time with them rather than those ungrateful, therapy inducing, namesake adults.

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redrobin-detective · 1 year

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Iruma-kun, the Six Fingers and Humanity

I have been mulling over this idea for days as I devoured the Iruma-kun anime then manga and am still struggling to articulate it. The best I can boil down to is the whole goal of the Six Fingers and the return to origins is, unbeknownst to them, a desire to become more human.

I can understand, in a way, their frustration. Demons used to be merciless killers, where the strong surpassed the weak and magic, aggression and power won the day. Now we see they have idol concerts and theme parks and silly games to help demons safely purge their “wickedness” which is, in reality just another part of their nature. The majority of modern day demons deny a large part of themselves. The whole idea of a wicked cycle is endlessly fascinating to me, like this species has compartmentalized themselves so much that their pent up darker impulses periodically spring out and require them to be handled gently or hidden away. I can see how this practice is insulting and incredibly restrictive of what a demon is.

Now, right from the start, Iruma has stood out in the demon world for a few reasons. First and most obviously, he lacks any practical or cultural knowledge of demonic society. We see Iruma ignorantly stride past social norms and boundaries he didn’t even know existed. If it weren’t for his upbeat, people pleasing attitude he’d be written off as a delinquent but instead he helps foster an environment of change in a bunch of slackers and misguided students. And change is a radical concept in a society that hasn’t replaced the demon king in centuries since the old one disappeared. The effect of Iruma’s very presence, his enthusiasm and attitude and cooperative abilities can be seen so strongly on the Misfit class that its no wonder he’s become such a stand out student.

So I had heard of Irumean when I first started the series and had high expectations of him being a full on bastard. And he simply wasn’t. He was arrogant, reckless, rude at the worst but even those around him commented that his innate, unnatural kindness was still there. I argue because Irumean was never a true wicked cycle. It was Ali-san’s attempt to induce a demonic ritual onto him. But humans aren’t like demons, Iruma is a good, kind, patient boy due to his trauma and strength of character. At any point he could lash out in the most horrific fashion and leave everyone stunned because he is not bound such such strict rules of personality and conduct. His humanity is as much a strength as it is a weakness.

So according to recent chapters, Iruma has traces of Delkira’s energy. My first thought was that it was emanating from Ali-san, which is a distinct possibility but why was the ring attracted to Iruma in the first place? My next theory is that Delkira had some connection to humans as well. Either he’s a hafling or a demonized human or spent a significant amount of time in the human world. Either way, this human perspective is what made him so powerful, such an irreplaceable leader that his throne has remained empty for so long. One could even argue that the energy that the Six Fingers identify as ‘Delkira’ is actually just ‘human’ since the King’s energy is familiar while a human’s is not.

My whole round about point I’m doing a very poor job of explaining essentially boils down to, demons want to return to their origins to have more control over their baser instincts. Instincts and free will that humans, such as Iruma, possess naturally. But while Iruma has the capability for great evil, unrestrained by a set cycle, he also has such an overflowing well of love in him. Delkira, what little we’ve seen of him comes across as brash, fickle and cruel. You may note those are human traits as well. But Iruma also leads with kindness, dedication and teamwork. He will make a marvelous King because the humanity he brings to the table will help all of demonkind.

I do believe as the manga progresses we will see Iruma’s humanity become a game changer in the battle against the Six Fingers. How he sees the world (both human and demon), how he interacts and inspires others, how he fights. Reaching a point where not only does Iruma stand up for himself but he is forced to cause harm (and by consequence addressing his people pleasing trauma) and behave in a manner not seen by demons outside of their wicked cycle. When he does, years down the road, become King, I believe he will address the concerns of factions like the Six Fingers. Demons are not meant to be fully contained but cannot be allowed to run rampant. With his feet in both worlds, I believe he will be able to balance both opposing views and ‘heal’ the underworld as the prophecy states. Not just from the instability of the Six Fingers but from this bizarre evolutionary cycle demons have fallen into over the centuries.

#mairimashita! iruma kun #welcome to demon school iruma kun #iruma kun spoilers #not sure how to tag this??#the wicked cycle is fascinating to me #so youre saying i can compile all my bitchy evil energy into a few day cycle??#its absolutely insane if you think about it #and Yes wtds is a lovely lighthearted series that I adore but sometimes I think 'gosh this is tame for hell'#and i argue that its not supposed to be like this!#how they got stuck in this cycle is up for debate if it pre or post dates Delkira #the point remains that Iruma can and absolutely should go feral at some point #bc he is a human and his personality and actions are managed only by himself #I want all his people pleasing meek adorableness to backfire on him and we see a hint of the rage beneath #I want him to maim even kill in a rage bc the indignities done to him have been simmering for years and now someone is threatening his new h #*home #The six fingers want him bc of delkira yeah but also his ability to transcend the limits of being a modern demon #something something humans are the true demons the latter having managed themselves so tightly they no longer resemble demons of old #that Iruma even as good and pure as he is is still more alike Delkira than any modern demon #Ive kind of lost the bubble on this but things Ive been thinking about #Im all caught up and I feel Extreme Stress over the Diverticulum #i cant wait!

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azuree1733 · 7 months

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Gotham war rant- :D

Ok so at first I really hated it and was like in the same boat with everyone about how cat woman vs Batman is stupid and unnecessary and don’t get me wrong I still am, the whole idea of her training people to be criminals with rules is ridiculous. However as the comic progresses and we see the whole other plot of Batman (Zur) and the rest of the family dealing with him is actually a really cool concept for two reasons. 1- because we get to see the family work together and it opens up future storylines with those characters so they can be written in either team-ups or solo comics and 2-acknowledging the whole Batman has multiple personalities (not like Bruce Wayne but all the other little “characters” in his head because we saw not just Zur locked away in his brain but there was a bunch of other “characters” up in his little mind prison) is really useful to help “retcon” mischaracterizations of him in that past and present like oh Batman gave one of his sons medically induced anxiety nope wasn’t him, he doesn’t know how to deal with children? Nope different personality. I think it’s a smart move and if they somehow get rid of these personalities by the end of the run (medicate him send him to therapy god knows he needs it) then there whole plan of making the batfam get along will seem so much less forced and it will make Batman a much more consistent character.

I also think they are setting it up for someone to die and ik we’re all thinking Jason but personally I’m thinking it’s gonna be Tim bro never dies so it’s gonna catch everyone off guard, it means nothing tho since he’ll come back immediately but with more trauma! For Jason it makes more sense for him to just leave like honestly stop trying to force him into the family. He can make appearances but that’s it, they just need a good writer who actually likes him to give him a run where he can actually have character development. He’s not super hard to write he’s literally Batman but he’s not afraid to break the no kill/no gun rule, yet he also has morals so he’s not gonna kill a bunch of innocents. (Also Jason finding out his bio dad is alive arc when???) (or Jason becoming a father arc when? Cause he would be such a good father I will show y’all panels if u disagree) (kinda want him to go back to a bit of an assassin/mercenary arc tho)

Anyway that’s my lil rant I kinda went off on a tangent, idk if u can tell yet but I really just want a good Jason comic 😛

If anyone reads all this yapping you get a gold star cause what 😭🫶

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broitsf-ckingfreezing · 9 months

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You know what

I think it’s really sad the way we treat Dooku as a Jedi Master. Not as a Sith, fuck that guy; he fell to the dark side and he fell HARD. He is irredeemable in that respect.

I’m talking about Jedi Master Dooku, who only interacts with Qui-Gon Jinn in Legends and fanon (because in TOTJ he had already fallen and was actively taking steps towards the downfall of the Jedi/Republic and becoming the apprentice). *Even then, I don’t really respect TOTJ as canon because of the awful way it paints the Jedi, but I will concede it as canon from the perspective of Dooku as an unreliable narrator. I just hate THAT bit where he straight up THROWS Qui-Gon and force chokes a guy and GETS AWAY WITH IT because “uwu the Jedi awe bad and cowwupt and Dooku was a victim 👉👈”

I always hated that because Obi and Dooku meet for the first time in AOTC, then clearly Enlightened MaverickTM Qui-Gon (see my opinions on THIS in @antianakins beautifully worded post) must have been abused by his master and kept Obi-Wan away from him to “protect him from evil” yadda yadda yadda, whatever. That Qui-Gon specialised in Ataru instead of Makashi like his master because Dooku was EvilTM and Qui-Gon wanted to “get back at him” or “escape trauma” or some shit like that, never because it is perfectly normal for a Jedi to find their strength in a form that is different from their teacher’s (see Anakin, Obi-Wan, WINDU, Dooku himself).

Or that because Master Dooku wore relatively regal looking robes (again, the only canonical proof of this we have is in TOTJ and COUNT Dooku, AKA ruler of Serenno) then he had a taste for “the finer things in life,” words used by EVERY fanfiction author, and was always either straight up a Sith the entire time or, at the very least, a bad Jedi who followed his own rules like Anakin. I disagree.

It has NEVER been canonically established that Dooku was an abusive man. In fact, remember that the Jedi consider Dooku a FRIEND? Even in AOTC when Padme rightly accuses Dooku of attempting to assassinate her, they extend to him the benefit of the doubt. Because he was a Jedi Master. A good one. So good, in fact, that when he outright aligns himself with a faction looking to actively separate from the Republic and the Jedi, they trust that his judgement is that he is doing right by his people. Not that he is plotting a galaxy-wide takeover.

(Don’t even get me started on Ki-Adi Mundi, the voice of reason, frequently being abused by the fans just because SOMEONE had to say this line. Clearly he’s evil! He’s an idiot! He’s corrupt! *rolls eyes*)

But why then did Dooku never meet Obi-Wan as a padawan, you ask?

It HAS been canonically established that Obi-Wan is a powerful Jedi and a powerful diplomat even before he became The Negotiator (they wouldn’t send any run-of-the-mill padawan and master duo to dispute the Naboo conflict, they sent DIPLOMATS). And he is Busy As Fuck. Remember, as a padawan he spent a YEAR on the run with Satine and Qui-Gon. And if you were to accept the Melida/Daan and Bandomeer arcs from Legends as canon, that probably adds up to another YEAR spent away from the temple, NOT including recovery time after those periods because we don’t have any real basis for how long it takes a Jedi, or even just Obi-Wan, to bounce back from the physical, mental, and Force trauma induced by these hefty skirmishes. Don’t forget, in two of these instances, Obi-Wan is only 13-14, and in the other he’s presumably about 18. And bacta tanks aren’t a magical fix-all. They don’t heal starvation, extremely long-term physical neglect/hurts, just like they don’t grow back limbs.

Dooku was also probably busy as hell. It is very likely that the two teams were never in the temple at the same time, or if they were, they were probably busy. Like teaching their respective padawans (remember a master can have more than one padawan, just not at the same time, and now that I think about it, it is pretty odd we never (hardly ever?) canonically see masters who have clearly had more than one padawan in their lifetime). Or healing from traumas. Or hanging out with friends. Or researching, or writing reports, or literally ANYTHING that could make someone busy enough to forgo introducing a child to their grandmaster. I mean, how many times did you visit your grandparents as a teenager? Probably not very often compared to the big picture that is your life.

Why didn’t they meet when Obi-Wan was knighted, then? Well, TOTJ shows us that Qui-Gon’s death was at least a little traumatic for his master, and that was his last straw. Dooku left. And after that, he probably didn’t want to see the child Qui-Gon raised. The boy who got to hear his pseudo-son’s final words and who died IN HIS ARMS. We also have NO IDEA in canon exactly how many missions Obi-Wan and Anakin went on, nor how long they lasted, but we can guess that they were an extremely busy pair knowing Obi-Wan’s prowess in diplomacy PLUS the recent reemergence of the literal thought-extinct Sith PLUS the frankly horrific ratio of Jedi to Force Null beings in the galaxy (meaning there just aren’t enough Jedi to get around to all these places) PLUS teaching a rescued slave child with childhood memories of the outer rim the ways of the Jedi and core worlds. We also know that by the time of AOTC, Anakin being probably about 17-18, possibly on the cusp of 19 which is his Knighting age, the pair have been on at least 9 missions where Anakin had to rescue Obi-Wan. Knowing Obi-WAN’s skill and power, and that these missions most likely occurred when Anakin was old enough to do things like save Obi-Wan from a whole NEST of gundarks, this is NOT a common occurrence. Even if consistently in 1 of every 5 missions Obi-Wan has to be rescued by Anakin, that adds to at least 40 missions where he didn’t. That’s a lot of missions in a ten year span on top of all the other things Jedi have to do that aren’t considered missions, again, like teaching, attending functions, researching and learning because Jedi must be a wellspring of knowledge to successfully mediate/placate/please whomever it is they’re interacting with.

#star wars #obi wan kenobi #pro jedi #dooku #master dooku #qui gon jinn #yes this is an anti Anakin post #it’s subtle #but it’s there #star wars legends #star wars canon #melida/daan #tales of the jedi #attack of the clones #jedi appreciation #star wars prequels

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twig-tea · 9 months

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Thai QL Favorites Tag Game

Tagged by @telomeke and @waitmyturtles, thank you both for the tag!

Credit: this game was created by @thatgirl4815 as Thai BL Favorites Tag Game.

I want you all to know before I start that asking for favourites is biphobic so you're going to have to ignore the places where I bent/ignored the rules about how many choices I was allowed to have. Also, this is so long, and took forever, I'm so sorry:

Favorite Thai QL:

I could caveat this until the end of time, but I'm going to go with the definition of "favourite" that's "has a special place in my heart" rather than necessarily "best"; and that's undoubtedly Until We Meet Again. I got very not normal about this show. When it was airing, I used to rewatch every episode before the new episode, and then rewatch the newly aired episode at least once before binging the show to date again. And I've binged it several times since. Sometimes if I need to cry, I'll put on the first 10 minutes and ugly-sob. This show felt like an apology and catharsis for years of built-up bury-your-gays induced trauma from queer media, in addition to a balm for all of the external relationship drama tropes in BL. I think I've talked about it around here somewhere before, how this show sets up all of the tropes for things that go wrong for couples in BL, and then everything is fine, over and over? And it was airing during the very start of the pandemic before the world was calling it a pandemic, when I was so worried about everything and governments hadn't caught up to being afraid yet, and I felt so alone, and this show over and over again said "it'll be ok", at a time I really needed to hear that. Plus it's got the whole epic-love-story-across-lives and the family acceptance redemption arc that as a still-only-partially-out-to-my-family-in-my-30s queer absolutely destroys me. Anyway, there are other shows that I would agree are as good or better (shout out to He's Coming to Me, I Told Sunset about You, Bad Buddy, Not Me, The Eclipse), but UWMA remains my fave (and gets two gifs for being top spot).

Favorite Pairing: I have seen this interpreted as branded pairs & as fictional couple, so I'm going to take that excuse to answer both questions. I'm honestly not a fan branded pairs as a thing and agree with @lurkingshan's comments on this, I tend to prefer it when people continuously work with different actors. That being said, JoongDunk seem to be having a lot of fun with the whole fanservice game, which is fun to watch for as long as they're enjoying themselves and continue to be in on the joke, which seems to be the case.

Fictional couple? Right at this moment I am still thinking about Khatha and Dome from Midnight Museum. I think this one hit me in my Chinese epics button, because the story felt a lot like a danmei (not the least because you could argue it reads as censored bromance). But this show asks questions about fate, God, the devil, multiverses, and then has its characters choosing to reject all of the above in order to choose each other? SIGN ME UP. Legitimately it's the most fun I've had watching a tv show in awhile, it was bananas, and I loved the journey of Khatha figuring out who Dome was in relationship to Chan, and deciding to love Dome as Dome, at the same time that Dome was also figuring out who he was, and deciding he preferred who he was when he was with Khatha. But also just Tor + Gun are incredible actors (Tor having been a stand-out since Hormones and Gun of course since The Blue Hour) and I would watch either of them in anything, but together they were magnetic (and evidence for my earlier point re: branded pairs, as much as I enjoy Off & Gun together!).

Most underrated actor: I'm going to say James Teeradon. He had a few small roles in Hormones 2 & 3, Diary of Tootsies, and The Stranded, and he had the main role in Project S: Skate our Souls and in Great Men Academy. First, I should say, you could argue none of these classify as BLs. Second, all of these have trigger warnings, so please take care of yourself and feel free to ask if you want content warnings. But he's one of those actors who never looks like the same person in each role he's playing, and he absolutely gives me shivers. His performance as Boo in Skate our Souls was legitimately chill-inducing--this one in particular has serious trigger warnings, I put off watching it for a long time because I knew about the warnings and waited until I was in the right headspace, and it still messed with me for weeks. But oh man, oh man that show, it rewrote part of my DNA. I don't even know that under-rated is fair to say since there was buzz around him when he was in these shows a few years ago, but he was trying to make it as part of a band for awhile and he hasn't been in much since. If there's one person I want to see in something else who a lot of other people don't talk about these days, it's James.

Cheating and taking the opportunity to choose a second actor from definitely-a-BL series: Fluke Chinnathan from Second Chance the Series. While Second Chance had a lot of flaws, the acting by Fluke and Tong was stellar. Their micro-expressions and body language was unreal. I feel strongly enough about this that I wrote an ode to it as part of the BL-Bracket for best kiss scene. No idea what Fluke is up to or if he even wants to keep acting, but I'd love to see him in something else--he's one of the only other actors (than James, mentioned above) that I'll go in to MyDramaList occasionally just to check to see if they're in anything new. PS if you do give Second Chance a shot, please know going in that Run and Games, real life brothers who are both actors, are both in this series but never in a scene together, and their characters are similar, so a lot of people have trouble telling them apart without knowing there are two different characters in the show.

(Also, I 100% would have said Suar for this question before La Pluie, because he did not get enough credit for You're My Sky and I think he was incredible).

Favorite Character: Honestly, I've deleted my answer to this so many times now. Choosing one is so hard! I'm going to go with White from Not Me. Incredibly loyal, strong moral values (but willing to break the rules/law to fulfil those values because he understands that law ≠ morality), self-sacrificing, extremely competent in some ways, but also has serious blind spots in others that leads to him making very silly choices especially around who they trust, lacking in self esteem especially around whether or not people will want him around. The way he chooses to give up his privilege--not for his brother, because he could have found a way to go back to his old life after everything if he wanted--because he saw what was wrong with all of it and decided to do what he could to help fix it (and not participate in it) is something that really resonated with me. I also love that he is an absolute marshmallow who cannot hide that fact. Plus White being a disaster bi who wanted Sean from the beginning endeared him to me forever. And it doesn't hurt that he's played by Gun Atthaphan

Favorite Side Character: I have also started and stopped this section so many times. Natty and her absolutely terrible taste in women from Diary of Tootsies, Na being at some points the only reason I kept watching Tonhon Chonlatee, Namo being smart enough to know to pretend she doesn't know what's going on in Not Me, Tong the ecovillage owner from Bad Buddy, Daisy and their incredible gender and mix of self esteem + self esteem issues in Secret Crush on You.

Alright I'm giving it to Dream in Something in My Room. I don't have good reasons for this; her character was artistic, had supernatural powers, green asymmetrical hair, and was stoic with a hidden dark past, and I am a simple woman. I wanted to know everything about her.

Favorite scene in a QL: How can I choose just one?! I'm choosing three and you can't stop me.

Third place, Not Me, with Sean and White under the pride flag. It has everything: It's iconic, it's cinematic, it's cathartic, it's political, it's a critical character moment, it has great music, it's full of queer joy, and it brings me so much happiness every time I see it.

Second: Dean and Pharm in front of the Pra Aphai Mani & sea ogress sculptures in the aquarium in Until We Meet Again. Partially because I love aquariums so much, partially because this sequence is one of the first ones we really get to see the hints of Intouch in Pharm. The way he moves around that aquarium is nothing like how he moves at school or his condo, and it's one of the things that struck me so hard on rewatch; while that scene did so much work towards establishing their characters the first time around, the second+ time it has so much more meaning. The throwaway line by Pharm about relating to the ogress now gives me chills.

Plus the way the aquarium scene got called back in I Promise You the Moon makes me really happy.

But first and top, the one that will forever live in my mind for the way it made me feel in my body: Teh and Oh-Aew on the rug in I Told Sunset About You. That moment, my god. Butterflies. Chills. Chewing glass. Devastation. I don't know that I've ever felt any other scene so viscerally; it transported me back to being a teenager and cuddling in clearly non-platonic ways with my bestie and wondering what was happening. Thinking about it now still gives me goosebumps. Maybe a bit of a weird choice because of the pain but I don't shy away from some pain in my faves!

Favorite line in a QL: Honestly I could put one of several meaningful quotes in here, probably the ones I've thought about most being the one from Bad Buddy that a few other folks have noted ("I may not be able to change the world but the world can't change me either"); and "can't we just get a little bit of space?" from The Warp Effect that I mentioned in my Silvy appreciation post. but the first thing that came to mind was this cracktastic banger moment from En of Love: This is Love Story that runs through my head every time a character P-Nong's someone when they don't mean it like that (and especially when newbies get confused about whether characters are actually related):

"'P' but not brothers; the way 'daddy' [said in English] doesn't really mean father. You get it?"

--Param, being a little shit (affectionate)

But also I think special mention needs to go to this new and immediate classic by Tien in La Pluie:

Most Anticipated QL (& why): I am very excited for 23.5 and Only Friends, also WuJu Bakery (does that count if it's Korean but starring Thai actors?) but....This is niche and might never happen, but MindTrio announced awhile ago that they were going to put out Chemistry in Love, which was either a sequel or related to Calculating Love? Listen, this is a low-budget production company making a slightly quirky trope-filled shorts that tend to have pretty cinematography but falter a bit on plot and pacing, and in Calculating Love the main character hits on his love interest with a series of math/graphing equations and coffee. I fully acknowledge that I am a particular kind of nerd, but I just really, really want to see people flirting with their Extremely Geeky special interests. Some sort of of follow-up to Calculating Love has been a maybe-thing since 2020, so it's most anticipated by amount of time I've been waiting. I have a list of 290 "upcoming" shows that may or may not ever happen so I'll stop there.

Healthiest relationship in a QL: I was very persuaded by @waitmyturtles' arguments re: King and Uea, and I thought about My Only 12% and even wrote a whole thing about Tinn and Gun from MSP before deleting it.

But I'm going to use this soapbox to give a hot take and say, by the end of the series, that it's Nuea and Toh from Secret Crush on You. Both of them have secretly loved each other for the whole series, and shown it in their own very unhealthy ways: Toh by keeping a collection of everything that reminds him of Nuea, and Nuea by being extremely cool-guy persona around Toh. But by the end, both of them have aired their insecurities about their relationship, and have committed to working on their relationship together. Toh stops assuming that they will break up (which Nuea explained was hurtful to him) and declares he'll fight for their relationship in front of Nuea's parents, and Nuea allows himself to be seen as very uncool through his vulnerability, and is more open about his uncool thoughts and feelings. I remember them being surprisingly healthy about jealousy too, once they're together, showing trust in one another when that photography club kid shows up. Nuea also makes a really sweet gesture that I think gets misunderstood at the end of the show; Toh explains that his collection makes him happy, that Nuea is more important so he'll give it up if he has to but he really, really does not want to. So Nuea finds a way to make the collection about them rather than about him, so that he can embrace it too and be less discomfited by it. I feel like there's not enough "meeting people where they are", and too many makeover fantasies in romance for my tastes. Instead, Secret Crush on You said listen, people are weird, and we all just need to find the other weirdos whose jagged edges fit with ours. And it's work figuring out together how they will fit, and they won't fit perfectly, but that's ok. As long as everyone is comfortable, it can be a little weird. It may be less realistic than say the way similar themes are handled in Utsukushii Kare, because behavioural change (especially around self-worth) is hard irl, but the question wasn't about which relationship is most realistic lol SCOY also said embrace cringe culture and I am here for it even if it is sometimes hard to watch because it is SO CRINGE; but I respect it for living its truth.

Most toxic relationship in a QL: Oof. I am a strong believer in "if it works for them, that's their business", as is probably evident from above, but the reveal of what was going on with King and Peat in Love Area (parts 1 & 2) was really next level BS and managed to be both toxic and ableist, so it gets a special mention and no gif.

Guilty pleasure series: I don't really subscribe to feeling guilty about liking things, but I have a bunch that don't get a lot of love and I fully understand why lol In addition to the example of Calculating Love above (which is like, a 6 on MDL, and TBH harsh but fair), I really enjoyed I Will Knock You. Maybe it was just the novelty but I loved the character of Noey so much, his vintage aesthetic, the amount of time spent around and in temples, and the most adorable closing credit sequence of all time (shows that have closing credit sequences that reflect the main relationship in the show is one of my favourite tropes!). The criticisms about it, especially the ones about the Thi character, are fully valid and I would not actually recommend it without a lot of caveats (e.g. warnings for blushing virgin trope + age gap, and sooort of glorification of gang membership?), but I had a great time.

Also maybe Y-Destiny episodes 9 & 10? Tohru and First as Kaeng and Puth, whew. I have a special place in my heart for storylines where the characters sleep together as friends with benefits and then have to renegotiate those boundaries because I've lived it more than once lol (Only Friends when?!). But the ending episode for the series was actually so offensively bad, I like to forget it exists.

Most underrated series: You're My Sky and He's Coming to Me have already gotten a lot of love so I'll just say YES to those. Would have said My Ride before this recent release to YT. Does Triage count if it's nominated for awards but nobody ever talks about it (probably because the distribution was so messy)? I think My Only 12% doesn't get enough love because of the pacing of the last episodes, but the rest of the show was SO good.

But I'm going to take this opportunity to get on a sandbox about Diary of Tootsies (spanning S1, S2, and the movie sequel Tootsies and the Fake).

This show is not BL; it is decidedly queer. There is no single love story, and if there is, it's undermined. And yet, because it's a comedy, it also gets overlooked in the lists of Important Queer Viewing (which is fair, honestly, that is not a read). But it means my blorbo of a show often doesn't get hyped up, so I'm taking the opportunity.

This show I would argue sits squarely in the by/for/about queers category as per @wen-kexing-apologist’s by/for/about Venn diagram. Watching it feels like a group hug; it's so very clearly written by actual queer people (even if this wasn't confirmed everywhere online, the screenwriter is out and speaks about this, but it's also just obvious) and I recognize so much of my friends and people I've known in these messy queers. It deals with casual sex, drug use, HIV, adoption, being closeted at work, and more.

It is also so funny. I didn't think I liked toilet humour until Make it Right and Diary of Tootsies proved me wrong. I honestly think about the scene with Natty and the handbag in the car approximately once a month. And the opening sequence of the sequel film!! What a choice for opening credits. And these queer friends are mean to one another, even in the moments they're being supportive of one another, and it is both familiar and delightful (also reminds me of this post by @bengiyo about whether viewers still love us when we're mean). The found family tropes are STRONG in this one, friends.

There is some fatphobia, though I always struggle with how much to warn for that because this show also has one of the only fat characters in QL who gets a character arc, a love interest, and to be a whole person. And to dance! The dance sequencesssss especially in S2, oh my heart. So much queer joy in this show in general!

Last thing I'll say about this show is that it also gets left off people's lists because the "main couple" if you can say there is one is not the one most fans were rooting for--I will admit, myself included. But the narrative convinced me to be satisfied with what we got, which is honestly to its credit!

Anyway TL;DR Diary of Tootsies makes me extremely happy and I'm glad it exists.

OMG ok I am letting this go now. Tagging @redxblueihateloveyou because you've not been active for awhile so this way you'll see this whenever you come back, and @formayhem because we are newly buds and I'd be curious about your answers! At this point everyone else must have been tagged by now, so please just consider yourself tagged if you haven't done this yet and tag me so I see it! I've been loving reading everyone's answers.

#thai ql tag game #until we meet again #midnight museum #joongdunk #james teeradon #fluke chinnathan #not me the series #something in my room #i told sunset about you #en of love #la pluie #calculating love #secret crush on you #diary of tootsies #i will knock you #not tagging the show because of criticism

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all-about-the-tea-parties · 1 year

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Rewatching Yellowjackets and noticed something

Lottie and Ben aren’t the only ones who are shot w/ the antlers. Shauna is, too.

Right after the plane starts to leave, she takes vallium and puts on Jackie’s necklace. And someone raises their arms right behind her head. A shot of Shauna with antlers and then she passes out.

This ties in a little with every antler shot being induced/linked with drugs/loose reality.

I’m just thinking about Jackie asking “got any secrets big enough to crash a plane?”

I’m thinking about Lottie whispering to the baby “you’re gonna change everything” and it does bc Shauna snaps. She finally fully snaps and devolves to her baser emotions. Without a hint of regret.

The first time she did that Jackie died.

Still not sure if the antlers denote power or if they’re just mean an omen. Something bad is about to happen.

Shauna spent months mocking and disdaining Lottie’s little prayer group, but she didn’t get punished, bc the wilderness needed her stressed, needed her to make this pregnancy difficult. So that it dies. So that it’s hungry when it’s given the food dream. So that Shauna is delirious and can’t protect it. So that she leans hard into hate and anger and rage and bloodlust.

It’s Shauna who says Jackie would want this.

It’s Shauna who tries to kill Travis.

Lottie is too compassionate. I don’t think she could ever condone hunting ppl. She could barely stomach getting overly praised for keep morale up (and when shoved into the wilderness cuz of her magic connection with the wild, she scoffs at the symbol for the first time and it tries to KILL her).

Lottie is horrified by the temptation of the wild.

Shauna is shaking from how much she wants to do this.

Shauna’s ruled by trauma. Lottie teaches ppl to work through it. Lottie keeps the peace in the group, and Shauna is a knife.

Shauna carries the secret big enough to destroy the group. A knife to their captain and a baby.

Shauna watches the meat. Dolls the rations.

Shauna talks to the corpse that suggests to her that she follow her hunger. A corpse that talks nothing like Jackie.

I can’t remember but does the bear and birds show up for Lottie? Or for Shauna?

Why does the girl who dies have Jackie’s necklace.

Who would’ve decided she wear it.

“It’s you and me against the world”

#shauna shipman #yellowjackets #theories

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kimdokja-real · 11 months

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I’ll contest that! (KDJ being confident)

KDJ is (from my view) a man with absolute conviction in his plans and interpretation of the novel. He’s been the sole reader of TWSA for thirteen years, he’s been drafting power charts and planning ways to beat the scenarios for over a decade, he lived for this story. If he knows nothing else, it’s TWSA.

To that end, during the novel’s events, he has the fourth wall dampening the scenario’s effects- certain scenes are emotionally charged and really cool to watch, definitely, but KDJ isn’t fully living in that moment, the fourth wall cushions the emotions. Delivering a presentation in reality is a lot more anxiety inducing than in the sanctity of your own head. This doesn’t detract from the previous point all that much and just adds a consideration that a KDJ without the fourth wall/dissociation would be stripped of his guard.

However! To say that KDJ has confidence in himself says two things, one directly and another by implication. To be more accurate would be to describe KDJ as confident but insecure. He has confidence in his interpretation, his decisions, his plans (arguably too much, as YJH repeatedly proves). His insecurity lies in his self worth. Funnily enough, I would also say that he’s overconfident in his perception on this level as well. He’s fully convinced that his life is worth less, that his companions won’t be too heavily impacted if he dies as long as he comes back, that despite YJH’s greatest trauma of the second round being Namgung Minyoung dying (even if he’ll be able to meet her again in the next regression) it won’t matter as much if KDJ is the one to die. He’s convinced that a person like him can’t be of value or worth loving. Calling this a matter of confidence is slightly funny, because this isn’t a matter of wavering confidence- this is a fundamental fact (to him) that underpins most of his decisions. He has confidence, and it’s almost completely separate from the question of his self-worth. It does make him interesting.

On the matter of bottom YJH I have little to say but that I agree. Also, that the potential of 1863 YJH thoughtlessly obeying KDJ under the influence of regression depression while KDJ takes care of him is underutilized in fanfiction. YJH likes having guidance, and it’s both very fitting for his character and very cute. Thoughts?

It's interesting to think he prepared for the scenarios while reading Ways of Survival, but I think Kim Dokja is so intelligent he actually didn't prepare at all. He just loved the story so much he remembered almost everything and used his information as tools to win the scenarios.

Even though he has the Fourth Wall dampening the effects, it's still reality, and no unconfident person would be stepping forth, breaking all the rules but winning somehow, and confronting the constellations in the sky in the apocalypse. But Kim Dokja so easily did that, which is kind of amazing.

He has confidence, and it’s almost completely separate from the question of his self-worth. It does make him interesting.

Yeah exactly, this is the very interesting thing about kdj. He's so set on his own perceptions due to his confidence, and it's like he confidently embraces his lack of self-worth.

I also think he doesn't see his impact on others is because he's a 'reader', a reader just reads, just takes in the information and reacts on their own, they have no impact on the characters in the story. That's why he can't believe Yoo Joonghyuk likes and even loves him (we don't even talk about romantic love here, I think he can't even believe Yoo Joonghyuk loves him platonically, that his favourite character grew to love and trust him), because to him Yoo Joonghyuk is the ultimate presence he can't influence. He hated, loved, cheered for, cried for Yoo Joonghyuk's story for 13 years, but he couldn't do anything about it. So to him he has zero impact on Yoo Joonghyuk, main character of Ways of Survival, as a reader.

I also think besides his (I theorize) romantic love for Yoo Joonghyuk, that's why he does so much for Yoo Joonghyuk and takes his important parts because he can finally do something to help Yoo Joonghyuk whom he watched suffering and in pain for years.

Of course while doing so, he ends up being the main character of the story, which he never imagined.

“Thank you for everything.”

[The remaining capture time is 3 minutes.]

The party members were running.

Lee Hyunsung, Jung Heewon, Shin Yoosung, Lee Gilyoung, Yoo Sangah, Gong Pildu, Lee Jihye…

They cried, screamed or were filled with deep anger. Everyone was coming towards me. My vision gradually diminished and all the characters became the landscape. I saw them and laughed.

「 Incarnation Kim Dokja will be killed by the person he loves most. 」

I had forgotten. All prophecies couldn’t be interpreted literally. In this Star Stream, people were stories.

[The constellation ‘Secretive Plotter’ is looking at you.]

[The constellation ‘Demon-like Judge of Fire’ is looking at you.]

[The constellation ‘Prisoner of the Golden Headband’ is looking at you.]

[The constellation ‘Abyssal Black Flame Dragon’ is looking at you.]

[The constellation ‘Maritime War God’ is looking at you.]

As the gazes of countless stars in the sky poured towards me, a story was running towards me.

“Ahhhhhh!”

Parents, friends and lovers were all stories.

[The remaining capture time is 2 minutes.]

This wasn’t the Ways of Survival I knew but—It was a story more wonderful than Ways of Survival.

[A constellation of a small planet is looking at you.]

[All the constellations on the Korean Peninsula are looking at you.]

It was my story. I laughed as Yoo Jonghyuk’s sword pierced my heart.

[Your fate has been realized.]

My body slowly sank down and Yoo Jonghyuk held onto me. “Kim Dokja.”

“It was a really great story. Isn’t that right?”

Yoo Jonghyuk stared down at me silently. I couldn’t find any words and just watched. It was as if I had always been meant to do this.

That's why I love this part so much, besides the romantic implication I theorized about.

(You can find it here if you're interested https://www.tumblr.com/bottomjoonghyuk/718023323739684864/omniscient-readers-viewpoint-is-a-romance?source=share, or https://bottomjoonghyuk.tumblr.com/post/718023323739684864/omniscient-readers-viewpoint-is-a-romance, it's a long analysis)

[The constellation ‘Secretive Plotter’ is looking at you.]

[The constellation ‘Demon-like Judge of Fire’ is looking at you.]

[The constellation ‘Prisoner of the Golden Headband’ is looking at you.]

[The constellation ‘Abyssal Black Flame Dragon’ is looking at you.]

[The constellation ‘Maritime War God’ is looking at you.]

As the gazes of countless stars in the sky poured towards me, a story was running towards me.

“Ahhhhhh!”

Parents, friends and lovers were all stories.

[The remaining capture time is 2 minutes.]

This wasn’t the Ways of Survival I knew but—It was a story more wonderful than Ways of Survival.

[A constellation of a small planet is looking at you.]

[All the constellations on the Korean Peninsula are looking at you.]

It was my story. I laughed as Yoo Jonghyuk’s sword pierced my heart.

[Your fate has been realized.]

Like this whole part, it's so epic for the main character of the story, Kim Dokja. The constellations, stars in the sky were looking at him and the main character of Ways of Survival, and his story of having been practically obsessed and loving the main character of Ways of Survival, is the one to kill him since Kim Dokja loves Yoo Joonghyuk the most.

This wasn’t the Ways of Survival I knew but—It was a story more wonderful than Ways of Survival.

This was so good for Kim Dokja. And his self-worth. He finally admitted that he's so great that his story (Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint) was a story more wonderful than Ways of Survival, because he's not just a reader, he's a participant, the main character.

It was my story. I laughed as Yoo Jonghyuk’s sword pierced my heart.

[Your fate has been realized.]

And like besides the romantic implication of 'one he loves the most', I feel like here Kim Dokja finally realized he's the main character of the story, killed in an epic way by the one he loves the most, and it's his story, so his laugh is kind of ironic.

But sadly after this, he seems to retreat again even though he practically impacted Ways of Survival with his action that it was updated and Yoo Joonghyuk was thinking about him there.

I think Kim Dokja is just a very confident person naturally and an extrovert, but the emotional abuse was so much that it almost permanently affected his self-worth. So it's a question of nature vs nurture, and nurture kind of won over which speaks of his lack of self-worth in himself, but he still has his confident nature which he shows in the apocalypse. And then he's ironic confident in his lack of self-worth, because confidence is in his nature.

The potential of obedient, a bit demure, trusting Yjh is very underutilized in fanfiction. The fandom has turned him into this rough, unforgiving, blunt, caring, top for Kim Dokja and I don't understand it at all. I know the fandom loves kdj but not only is it OOC, yjh deserves some love too. And KDJ taking care of YJH is more close to canon btw, he's also protecting and looking out for YJH.

Yoo Joonghyuk does like having guidance yeah, of course he does, he had to go through all the regression stuff alone, because he was the only one with it and the only one who knew. So he likes having guidance from KDJ, (there's one moment where he obediently hands KDJ his sword, his weapon man), and for once he's following someone not the other way around, which is fitting for the change in and evolution of his character and very cute.

#ask #kim dokja #yoo joonghyuk #dokhyuk #dokjoong #joongdok #orv #omniscient reader's viewpoint #bottom joonghyuk #bottom yoo joonghyuk #top kim dokja

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