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lilyrachelcassidy · 2 years

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Hello dear- I love the idea of spooktober 🎃🎃 but I can't for the life of me think of a written prompt so I shall send you a gif instead:

I hope you have fun with it

xx Val

A/N: Thank you Val so much for sending in the request. I love the GIF and as soon as I saw it, I instantly knew what to do with it. Wishing you a happy happy Halloween today, have fun (also with reading hehe)!

Summery: reviving Thomas Shelby back to life (quite literally).

WC: 1.3k

Warnings: supernatural themes (dark magic)

xoxoxoxoxo

Somewhere in a distinct part of the house, the sound of motion and animation had been made, setting your nerves even more ablaze. Must have been Polly, or Arthur, you weren't sure. Jitteriness and dismay accompanied you the whole time. Today, on this very day, everything was supposed to change; change back to how things had been in the past.

The sudden knock came on your bedroom door, causing you to jump lightly at the abrupt sound. You looked over in the direction, contemplating your decision, and perhaps the entire sense of existence, until you concluded there was no way out of the situation no more. The verdicts had befallen like a hapless dice of kismet.

"Come in," you said, utterly contradicting your state of mind. You wanted everyone to be gone, the entire assembly of people downstairs, although you had been the one who had come up with the initiative of commencing such a gathering. You wanted to muster that previously owned courage right now.

"You ready, gal?" Arthur's head peaked through the slim gap of the opened door. He looked at you as if already knowing the answer to his question.

"Ummm... yeah, I think. I just have to put on the cloak and then... yeah, give me two more minutes." While saying so, you made sure to feign a smile, try as might to convince yourself in the utter lie of being prepared for the upcoming.

Something in your expression must have crumpled, however, because Arthur frowned at your weak attempts. "You know, the whole ordeal still can be postponed or canceled, if you don't want-"

"No! I want to! So badly. It's just that..." Subconsciously, your fingers started fidgeting again and you twisted your hands in nervousness, try as might to obscure your emotions.

Arthur was no longer leaning on the door frame but decided to enter the room after all, and made his way over to the bed, settling himself just next to you. From that distance you could also detect the rapidness of his breaths; he was brittle too, you noted shrewdly.

Somehow feeling that position more obliging to spill the truth, you looked away, rather focusing your gaze on the floor, and rambled on: "I'm sorry. I'm distressed, that's all. I've never... bewitched anyone before. Or played with dark magic. I'm just scared that if something should go wrong, we might be doomed, you know."

The sinewy hand covered your knee in a conciliatory manner. Sometimes you wondered whether you have fallen in love with the right person - it could have been someone of a sensitive nature as yours, preferring to move on with a tranquil lifestyle you would have loved to lead. Instead, there was a man who had killed and terrorized people for his bread and butter as if it had been a social standard. The man who was dead at this point in his life.

But not for long.

"If that makes you happy, there have been only two administered cases of failed dark magic in history."

"And what were the consequences of that?"

"Well... they have been overruled by the dark spirits-"

"Oi, Arthur!" You hid your face in your hands, shaking your head. Was that supposed to be fortifying?

"But that's beside the point. It only proves how rare the complications are!”

Glancing over at him, knowingly, you couldn’t help the smile that ensued on your lips at his attempts of appeasement. There were many circulating opinions about Arthur in the vicinity, but the real him was standing just here, in front of you - honorable and amicable.

After that, you merely thanked him for his uplift to which he smiled, and then still making sure that you were sure of your resolutions and still standing on your ground, he excused himself from the room, letting you change back into the appropriate garments for the occasion.

Briskly, you grabbed the ink black cloak which had been loosely handing the chair, then quickly pulled it through your head, and eyed yourself critically in the mirror.

‘Tasteful, at least,’ you thought to yourself, just before fetching the last item to complete the outfit - the macabre mask which, apparently - as Polly has instructed you - was a necessity during the ritual. In mere seconds, dashing down the stairs, you were standing in front of the living room and entering it with the impetus. As quickly as the door swung ajar, you beheld an already-encircled, bemasked group of figures, their outlines irradiated by a waning flicker of the candles in, apart from that, dark room. The only one without the mask was Polly, who sent you a light, motherly smile before extending her hand and mutely asking you to join the group. With the final exhale, so you did: you seized the palms of people beside you - one of Polly, the second one, callous, of the unknown owner.

The enchantments and whisperings commenced and, with intertwined fingers, you closed your eyes and joined. The few, first seconds abounded in nothingness, incoherent murmurs merely filling up the room; but that was only for one minute until the scenery started to evolve rapidly. The previous murmurs were no longer quiet but now changed almost into shouts in your ears as if somebody had been just beside you, screaming; the tension in the room was almost palpable and could be almost literally cut with a bayonet, so thick and unbearably suffocating it was; the waining flicker of candles transformed into blinding whiteness and even with your eyelids closed, you could perceive its intensity.

Still deciding to risk it all, you opened your eyes in the little slits, and as you had assumed previously, not much could have been seen. In the wholistic blur, one particular thing that caught your attention was a sumptuous, long-necked vase in the middle of the circle you could have sworn hadn't been there. The thick, muddy substance was oozing out of it, soon excluding all over the floor, and to your surprise, forming a human-like shape.

First starting from the feet, it gradually evolved to the full human figure, and you, caught totally off guard, stared at the whole phenomena, not daring to glance away nor effuse any kind of sound. No one besides you seemed to be affected by the occurrence because the chants sustained and even picked up on the pace.

But then suddenly something happened, something you very not even sure how to describe - the mud-person (or so you liked to call that) converted into a more human-resembling form; the lineaments slowly started carving, the body shape becoming more and more pronounced, and the murky texture changed into a sallow skin.

Unwittingly, you emitted a gasp - no longer was a mud mass standing in front of you, but Thomas fucking Shelby himself. His eyes were closed, his mouth pursed, and he was standing in the middle of the circle in the nudest form. As if feeling the intensity of your stare on him, his eyelids flew open, revealing the bloodshot whites juxtaposing with the blackness of his orbs.

You found yourself startled at his grisly appearance; he still looked like Thomas Shelby, handsome in the way, but also as if owned by some dark spirits at the same time.

Tommy ogled you, never tearing his gaze away to other participants of the ritual; he appeared positively possessive, wild even, and for a moment you got scared he might throw himself at you. But none of that happened, and instead, he grinned, menacingly, like a madman to their victim. When he spoke up, his voice was hoarse and deemed amused:

“Missed me much?”

xoxoxoxox

A/N: okay, so the thing I should have mentioned in the first a/n was that I started reading too much E.A.Poe and that... reflects my writing rn I think (especially the ‘the premature burial’ like...). So here, let’s put it truthfully, we get in touch with a tad necromancy-like theme which I hope works perfectly for setting a Halloween-ish atmosphere. Yet I hoped you enjoyed Val! and the happy happy start of November!<3

#tommy shelby x reader #thomas shelby x reader #tommy shelby x you #tommy shelby x y/n #thomas shelby x you #thomas shelby x y/n #Thomas shelby #Tommy shelby #Peaky Blinders #halloween #necromancy lol #and halloween!!!

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steveslab · 2 years

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#IFTTT #The Avocado

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jedimaster3000 · 2 years

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Soulmates

Frankie Morales x Fem!Reader

Rating: 18+ (MINORS DO NOT INTERACT)

Fluff, some angst, smut.

Warnings: Language, infidelity, explicit smut (oral sex f!receiving, handjob, unprotected sex). Lots of touching, I’m serious minors get away. Let me know if I missed anything please!

Word count: 3.9k+

Summary:

A soulmate is a person with whom one has a strong affinity, shared values and tastes, and often a romantic bond. They can make you feel at home, and their parting means the darkest moment to contrast the heaven you shared with them. But their love is not to be forgotten, soulmates are to be enjoyed, kissed, touched, and praised as if that parting moment will not arrive.

A/N: This is the first time I share smut that I’ve written, so you can imagine the state that I’m in. I hope you enjoy this and if you do I encourage you to interact with the story (Minors, this is my last warning, please leave). Thank you for reading!

Masterlist

Frankie’s bed was the most comfortable one you had ever felt. No amount of pillows in that horrible bed you owned could ever make you feel like you were laying on a cloud, your body sinking into the mattress only made it even more comfortable.

You took a sniff off the white sheets you had buried your face into, the smell of his characteristic cologne and the lavender from the laundry detergents he used on everything mixed to create a particular, yet pleasantly harmonious scent.

It smelled like Frankie. If his essence could be put into a bottle it would smell exactly like this, smokey and with a touch of flowers to completely encapsulate his persona. Someone who would put a bullet through a strangers’ head when required and without thinking twice, but also someone who would patiently and attentively listen to your complaints about that fucking fiancé of yours.

“I should leave him,” you blurted.

“You should,” he responded from the opposite side of the bed, looking at you slowly descend into the anger that Ethan always provoked in you.

He never contradicted you, because of two reasons. The first one being that he knew better than to try to go against you, you were always right. The second one being that he was madly in love with you, and he had been for so long that any chances of seeing you single again could make him change his own name if necessary for the wish to come true.

You turned in the bed until you laid on your back, looking at the ceiling with both hands rubbing your temples, trying to get that headache to go away.

“I’m serious,” you continued, “I’m going to leave him.”

He let out a loud sigh, shaking his head.

“You’ve been saying that for quite some time now,” he pointed out.

You had been saying that for some time. Months, at this point. Always mad enough to just spit it out but never serious enough to actually go through with it.

You got up and turned to face him with your hands on your hips.

“You know I prepared his favorite lunch last week before he left for work,” you began, “I got up early, I cut the sandwich the way he likes, I made the salad with the special dressing that costs like 30 dollars, I put it all together neatly and even wrote him a fucking note like all the other housewives do…”

Frankie listened to every word you said attentively, admiring that beautiful face of yours and secretly loving how extra hot you looked whenever you got mad.

“And you know what he did?” You bent over, putting your hands on top of the bed.

Frankie’s eyes tried so hard not to focus on your cleavage, he had to concentrate in order to maintain his eyes locked with yours. His fingers fiddled with each other before he made a coherent thought.

“Nothing?”

“Fucking nothing!” You yelled, throwing your hands up and standing straight. He let out a deep breath and shook his head before focusing on you again.

“He had the nerve to tell me his sandwich was cold when we were having dinner,” you said walking around the room, “Oh, and of course then comes his favorite topic for most dinners, the goddam stock market. He has this Jordan-Belfort-complex which just means that he’s a dick in love with money and he probably cheats on me.”

Frankie slightly chuckled.

You had been pacing around the whole room, moving your arms with an exaggerated mannerism that was kind of funny. But the anger you felt was considered normal, the ranting was something you did every time you visited Frankie for the first 30 minutes.

What you did the rest of the time, was something completely different.

After venting, he would put his hands on you. And you would let him touch you however he wanted until your breathing pace was all uneven from the screaming of his name and the moans he got out of you.

The ritual you shared had been pretty much the same for the last couple of months, ever since you two met at the remote coffee shop on the suburbs of the city. After many years of not seeing each other because of his work, you still felt your heart rush whenever he smiled, he still had that undying crush on you that caused him to blush anytime you complimented him. It began as an innocent thing, a friendship.

But you two were close before he left, it was only normal you two would become close when he came back. You had too much to talk about and he had always been good at listening to you, ever since high school.

Back in high school, you used to get your heart broken by some random douchebag that would dump you after getting you too excited, and he would take care of you and your broken heart. He used to buy your favorite candies and play The Breakfast Club on the old TV back in your parents’ house. He did anything to get a smile out of you, he would tell stupid jokes and help you with your homework even though the smarter one was you. He was the kind of boy that would bring a chair for you to sit if you got just too tired of standing at some random event.

He did everything for you, he was your best friend. And just like him, you worried about him.

That’s why you were so concerned when he wanted to join the army. You called him about ten times before he left, you looked up every college available that could be a good option for him, you talked to his mom and tried to convince him to stay. You didn’t want him to leave, you were afraid of how much he could change.

You were afraid he would return as a completely different person. Afraid he would come back too serious, too broken, a different Frankie from the one with shiny eyes and the nice gestures. He made you feel good, and you never got to tell him just how much you really liked him before he left.

Time had gone by. And he was a different Frankie. The shine on his eyes was not the same anymore, he had finally let his beard grow out even though there were spots that refused to do so, he had scars inside and out from things he had done and seen. He came back home when he couldn’t take it anymore, and he knew only one person could ground him back to the person he wanted to be again.

That was you. He wanted to listen to you talk for hours, he wanted to watch 80s movies that you both had seen a thousand times. He wanted to ask you out, tell you just how much he missed you, just how much he missed being there for you and just… with you.

It was too late.

You were engaged to the man your father was proud of. The one who stopped paying attention to you only a month after you said ‘Yes’, the one who didn’t ask about your day, the one who took anything you did for granted. And you soon lost all interest. Meanwhile, your dad’s only grew because of how much money your fiancé’s job was giving you.

The first time he saw your ring he felt a small pain in his chest, he knew exactly what it was, but he put on a smile and congratulated you. He set a mental reminder to cancel the flowers that would be delivered to your house tomorrow as soon as he could, that wasn’t an option anymore.

“He’s a dick,” he shrugged, “He doesn’t deserve you, and you know that.”

“Yeah but, I just…” you trailed off.

“You what?”

“I don’t know,” you sat down next to his legs, “I just don’t know.”

He brought a hand up to the side of your face, sweetly brushing your cheek with his thumb as your eyes connected. The calmness his eyes gave you was a unique thing, it validated your doubts and anything else you had inside of your head at that moment.

He understood you even when you said “I don’t know”, and that was the reason why soon after you two had reunited he sat you down, he gave you a 20-minute talk about why you should leave your fiancé, about how you should find someone that treated you the way you deserved, about why you were the greatest woman on Earth and how he wished he could have you.

And just when he had finished the last bit, you jumped into his arms to kiss him, sending everything straight to fucking hell, taking out your ring and leaving it on the table next to you. That was the first time you two fucked, and it certainly wasn’t the last time.

He began to take care of you again, constantly and in a more mature manner than before. He used his hands, mouth, and cock to make you feel like a fucking Goddess, he prayed to you with the praise left his mouth as he made love to you.

The yearning for each other through the years only made the bond you two began in his bed stronger. Now, you were soulmates that were separated by some conflict as old as time, the classic marriage-to-be blessed by your family and their wishes of seeing you as a rich housewife to some asshole. Ethan could never make you feel like Frankie, and you couldn’t just leave him without first having to confront your father with the reality that you wanted this imperfect, retired soldier that would never give you a mansion or an expensive car to drive to a yoga class with other empty women that had suffered the same fate as you.

Your head and your heart had made a mess of your life, and Frankie was the only person that made you forget it all. Whenever you were at his house, whenever you entered his grey bedroom that nobody would ever think of as ideal… it became your personal heaven with your own angel. You never wanted to leave and you only allowed the first 30 minutes to let out your thoughts before firmly closing the door and focusing on the man you truly loved.

I can’t and would never quit you. Not when you’re all I wish I could have.

You put your hand on top of his and took it out of your face to get up and walk to his door. You closed it, sealing it shut, even though you were the only two people in the house.

You turned around with your back pressed against the door, your eyes found his and you let out a deep breath.

“Just the two of us now,” he said, smirking.

“Finally,” you smiled.

That smile alone made him feel all the butterflies he had always felt around you, for the last 15 years, he still had that same soft spot for you and how much he liked everything about you.

You took your shoes off and walked to the foot of the bed, slowly removing the straps of your dress to finally let it fall to the floor. Frankie’s eyes took in the sight of you in that delicate pink lingerie that made your body look like a masterpiece, something sculpted by Michelangelo or a poem written by Pablo Neruda, that was what you embodied.

His hands trembled with excitement as he sat right in front of you, softly touching your waist and looking up slightly.

“Let me take care of you, love” he pressed a kiss to your chest, “The way you deserve, the way he should treat you.”

The huskiness in his voice was so intoxicating you couldn’t even get words out. You nodded, wrapping your arms around his neck.

“You’re beautiful,” his hands roamed all over your back. “You’re fucking gorgeous.”

When his hands finally removed your bra and threw it to some forgotten place his mouth deposited sweet and wet kisses all over both of your breasts, he brushed your nipples with his hands and felt the weight of them on his hands. You removed his baseball cap while small hums of pleasure filled the silence.

He continued his way down until his hands found your ass and he kneaded the flesh there with a groan of approval because your fingers were now buried in his scalp, playing with his hair.

“You like this baby?” He asked and then his hand felt the heat between your legs, he smiled. “Yeah, you do.”

He got up and took your shoulders to softly lay you down on his bed.

All of those things that give you migraines were gone, all you had in mind was him. Him and how gentle he was with you, how meaningful, how much he did to make you feel good.

“Kiss me,” you whispered.

You didn’t need to ask twice, he bent down on top of you and crashed your lips with his in a passionate kiss that contained all the eagerness he had over this moment. He tasted divine, like always. Your mouths moved together in perfect sync while his hands removed the remaining underwear you had.

His tongue entered your mouth and perfectly lapped over yours, exploring you and taking you in. He groaned into your mouth when he felt your wetness over his hardened cock that was covered by his pants. You began removing his t-shirt still not separating your lips from him, desperate as if this would be the last kiss between the two of you.

You caught his lower lip between your teeth and whispered against his mouth, “Take me, Frankie.”

For him, it felt like he needed to apply some of his army training in order to restrain himself and not fuck you right there when you asked. He wanted you to feel good, and he’d take his time to make sure you enjoyed yourself as much as possible.

He retrieved to take his t-shirt off and when he returned to your body, he began kissing every single part of you.

First your chin, your jaw, your neck, he left several kisses all over your chest and his nose nuzzled between your breasts, taking in the sweet smell of your lotion. He kissed your belly several times before he finally continued his way down.

Every kiss he left had the admiration for your body in it, you felt the spots tickling with some electricity even after he had moved on.

When he reached your mound he took the bends of your knees and positioned them over each of his shoulders. The first lap of his tongue was enough to make your back arch and a loud groan leave your mouth. You took a fistful of his hair and kept his face buried between your thighs, the pleasure his mouth was bringing you with each move of his tongue was too much to risk losing it.

“Taste so good baby,” he mumbled against your soaked cunt.

He continued to suck your clit into his mouth and then fuck you with his tongue. He knew exactly how to move it along your folds, every lap making you see more stars than before. When he introduced one finger into your cunt, his name inevitably left your mouth in a pleading.

“More, please…”

He introduced one more finger while he continued to lick your pussy, every single nerve on you completely raw from his touch and even the scruff on his face that would briefly brush your skin. It all felt too good, too perfect. His fingers curled inside of you, making you sob from ecstasy.

“I-I’m gonna c-cum…” you mumbled in between moans.

He encouraged you by pressing his face even closer to your mound, his fingers moving quicker and his tongue never stopping. He needed you to come just as much as you wanted to, and his mouth was masterful at showing that. The incessant flicks of his tongue through your folds taking you higher and higher each time. His left hand shot up to grab one of your breasts and the feel of his fingers over your nipples just got you closer to your climax.

He knew every single thing about you. In this life and in the next one, he’d know you and everything about you, especially how to treat your body and its needs.

When the third finger was introduced you came undone into his mouth, the pants for air more and more aggressive as the oversensitivity took over you. He licked you clean, taking everything you gave him and with a satiated ‘hum’ he let your legs fall off his shoulder to get up and get rid of what was left of his clothing.

You looked up at him through heavy-lidded eyes, the high of your orgasm still vibrating through you. With some strength, you propped yourself on your elbows as he got rid of his underwear.

“You’re so good to me,” you muttered.

A small chuckle left his body and he lowered himself on top of you, leaving a kiss on your forehead.

“Yeah, and?”

“Why?”

You didn’t really know why you asked that. Maybe because you were still on Cloud 9, you hadn’t really gotten too personal to ask that yet. In your right state, you probably would have feared to ask something that could make things uncomfortable between the two of you.

But it didn’t.

His hand grabbed the back of your neck softly and he looked directly into your eyes, “You’re my girl,” he said, “I’ll always be good to my girl.”

You smiled with your lips and then licked your palm to which he lifted his eyebrows with intrigue.

“Even though someone else has me?” You asked.

Your hand traveled in between your bodies until it found his hard length ready for you. You put your hand around it and the first stroke you gave him made him close his eyes and let out a grunt. You waited for him to find you with his eyes again, and when they did, you saw them even darker and drenched in lust because of your hand’s expert moves on his cock.

“You’re mine baby,” he said in between pants. “I don’t—I don’t care who you wake up next to…”

You continued to stroke him slowly and meaningfully, spreading that bit of precum all over his big cock and feeling all of the veins pulse in your palm.

“…or who you make lunch for… Fuck—“

You began kissing his neck just under his ear, the spot that always drove him crazy and had him losing it. The handjob and the kisses were making it extra difficult to get out a coherent sentence.

“You—you’ll always come back to me…” he said, “And I’ll be here… always baby, whenever you need me. And you’ll always be mine…” a moan of your name left his lips and he decided it was too much.

“Need to fuck you, beautiful,” he whispered, “Let me fuck you.”

You could never deny that to him, so you let go of his cock and waited to see what he would do. He turned you around on your knees and put an arm right through your chest, holding you tight against him. He put his other hand on your hip to guide himself inside of you.

His cock split you open slowly, and your fingernails dug into his forearm as a loud groan left your mouth. The first thrust feeling just like the first time you did this, the pleasure making you ask yourself why didn’t you do this sooner.

“Frankie… fuck…”

“So tight baby,” he said slowly bottoming out inside of you, “Fucking perfect.”

He nuzzled his nose into the side of your neck, inhaling your scent as he began to set a pace that was fast enough to satisfy you but slow enough to really enjoy having you.

He pushed himself in and out of you while grunting your name, and your moans were steady as he was fucking you completely senseless. Nothing out of that room existed, the only thing existing in the world was the two of you.

With every thrust, he let you know just how much he liked you, you, and your everything.

“So good baby,” he panted, “so sweet. My girl… my perfect girl…”

“Fuck I—“ you tried putting words to your pleasure.

You got interrupted when his cock reached that place inside of you no man had ever touched before, the one only he knew how to find and his cock focused on that place only. Getting moans and whines out of you while he kissed your neck and the space between it and your shoulder.

“That feel good, beautiful?”

“Yes!” You screamed. “Don’t s-stop, don’t stop fucking me Frankie,” you begged.

His pace went up a bit with your words that always had an effect on him. Everything you did he found attractive, everything was addictive and just pulled him in closer to you.

He grabbed your right tit with his hand and began fucking you more intensively when you began spasming around his cock. The feeling of it beginning to satiate you to your maximum. The sounds Frankie pulled out of you were telling him exactly how long before you came. So he took the hand that he had on your hip and rubbed your clit with it, immediately pushing you over the edge and feeling all of your warm cum on his cock.

Your head fell back on his shoulder as he continued to fuck into you, pursuing his own release. He was so close, your hands softly caressing his arm was just another sweet gesture of you that encouraged him.

“Frankie…” you turned your head to his ear, “Come for me, baby…”

He moaned your name and closed his eyes just before he felt it coming.

“I’m yours…”

And with that, hot spurts of cum were inside of you, his release completely filling you and making you whine at the sensation.

He had to ride out his orgasm until he was only left with you sitting comfortably on top of him, his length still buried inside of you to the hilt. He started roaming his hands softly all over your body as you kissed his jaw and cheek. He touched your thighs, your belly, your arms, your breasts, and then he finally pushed you against him again with both of his arms pressed tightly into your middle.

He turned his head to find your mouth in another kiss, one post orgasm and completely lost in the beauty of what you had both felt and done on his bed. True love flowed between the two of you. True feelings that had been there for so many years and you two had just begun to discover, finally.

You would come back as much as necessary, you would never stop this even if it meant cheating on your partner. Because he was too good, he was all that was good. Inside of this room, you would make love and feel one another. Outside, the world had its own problems. Here, at least you found an answer to yours.

A friend, someone who loved you, someone who listened, someone who’d do anything to make you feel good.

That, you would never lose again.

- - -

Part 2

#frankie morales #frankie catfish morales #frankie morales x reader #frankie morales x you #triple frontier #frankie morales fanfiction #frankie morales one shot #frankie morales/reader #frankie morales/you

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danniburgh · 3 years

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Morning Delight (Javier Peña x f!reader)

Pairing: Javier Peña x f!reader

Summary: You have a boyfriend and he’s really great, but Javier Peña is selfish and he’s jealous and he wants you all for him.

Word count: +2.1k

Warnings: well; smut, (p in v), fingering, spitting (just a bit), unprotected sex, (please wear condoms) 1 degrading word (sl*t), infidelity (not condoning it), me trying to make terrible metaphors,

A/N: i got an ask and while writing what was supposed to be a small drabble it grew and well now we are here, writing a os when i have 4 waiting in line to be written :) (bold phrases are the asked prompts)

Masterlist // Read on ao3 // ko-fi

comments and reblogs are eternally appreciated 💓

“Hello, gorgeous,” Brandon, your boyfriend, allowed himself into the office you shared with your partners, the three of you lifted your heads to see him and you gave him a smile, he was standing in front of your desk holding a paper bag and a carton cup “brought you breakfast,”

“You shouldn’t have, baby,” you received the food from him and he leaned down to give you a short kiss, “thank you,” you muttered and he wrinkled his nose.

“See you for lunch?” he asked you softly and you nodded. He then walked out giving you a last glance and winking through the open door.

You could feel the stares of your partners, one of them heavier than the other, you looked at Steve and he had a teasing smirk adorning his face. You rolled your eyes and tossed him the paper bag, he quickly caught it and without hesitating opened it and rummaged around it, then you looked at Javier, sitting across the room from you and noticed the deep frown that made his face quirk and his brown eyes harden, locking his gaze on yours. He said nothing to you nor to Steve when he passed the bag to him.

Steve cleared his throat absentmindedly from his desk and kept on taping while eating and you broke eye contact (or stare contest) with Javier, returning to do what you were doing.

Soon enough you finished all your reports and you stood up to return some of them to the records room, when you entered and were about to close the door a foot got in between it and the frame to stop it from closing, the sudden action startled you and before your brain could fully comprehend what was going on the door opened, Javier got inside the room and closed the door, locking it.

“What the hell are you doing?” he asked under his breath, you frowned,

“What?”

“Don’t play fool, baby,” he stepped closer to you, and when you were about to tell him, yet again, to not call you that, he spoke again “what do you think you’re doing kissing that boy like that in the office?” you snorted.

“What?” you couldn’t stop yourself from laughing “who do you think you are?” the rhetoric made Javier’s jaw clench and he gave another step closer to you, towering over your body, you looked at his hardened face and at his dilated pupils, you sighed at the way his body warmth was just starting to mingle with yours “wait, are you jealous?” you questioned with a smirk “really?”

His chest puffed as he filled it with air and deflated when he let it out, almost blowing on your face, he was so close you could feel the way his body was reacting to you and the way you were looking at him. Then Javier licked his lips and you knew exactly what that meant.

“Don’t,” you whispered, it was his turn to smirk to you “don’t you dare,”

“C’mon, chiquita,” Javier let his hand stationed on your hip as he made you get impossibly closer to him, pressing you against his body “’s not like it would be our first time,”

“My boyfriend would kill us,” you warned, actually worried, you liked Brandon, you really did, he was different than Javier and for you that was an excellent thing; Brandon wasn’t afraid of tell you what he wanted or how he felt, he was a fantastic listener, he was funny and charismatic in the sense that you would ask him for directions on the street if you were lost, he was cute and sweet and someone you could see yourself dating for a long time. But Javier... Javier had you wrapped around his finger since the first time he had laid eyes on you, since he had touched you, since his hands made your skin feel like burning from the inside out, since his kisses lingered on your body for days.

“That boy won’t do shit, even if he finds out,” his tone dropped an octave and his other hand landed on the small of your back just above the hem of your blazer and the waistband of your skirt and you instantly became putty under his touch.

“Fuck,” your voice was so low it could had been confused for a soft sigh, and as your body warmed up against Javier’s hands, his mouth trapped yours and started devouring it.

Javier’s kiss in the past had been hardly soft, some of them were cautious, some were firm, you weren’t expecting anything gentle, but the way he was kissing you was unprecedented for you, he was moving against your lips as if he wanted to absorb your every thought, as if he wanted to be your main source of oxygen, as if he wanted to breathe you in and never breathe you out. Javier’s hands slipped down your blazer and your blouse and he started massaging your breasts over the soft cloth of your bra.

“Why is that boy so special? huh?” he muttered against the skin of your jaw as he nibbled it and down your neck, your hands could barely respond to your brain, curling around his neck, playing with the hair of his nape as you knew he liked, forgetting everything about Brandon and about the place you were at the moment, the only thing that invaded your mind was Javier and his smell of coffee, cigarette smoke, the aftershave he put on in the morning and how much you fucking missed his rough touch. “what does he do to you that you let him kiss you in front of everyone?” his voice was rough and low and it sounded like a feral grumble and it made you moan, one of his hands slid from your chest to your thigh over your skirt and then slowly moved upwards, lifting it. Jesus Christ, he was doing it so slow you were sure your skin would scream against his touch if it could.

“He–he,” you tried to say, he cut your sentence before it could really start when he kissed you again, this time rougher, formless, just two mouths moving against each other as his hand under your skirt played with the hem of your panties and slowly, painfully slow, moved inside of it to your mound. Your skin was on fire, you were sure you were about to combust right then and there. “Javi–” his finger played with your clit and you felt your knees weaken, he tightened the grip on your back and he started circling the bundle of nerves leisurely “more” you begged and you could feel his smirk on your skin.

“What was that?” he teased, adding another finger to his ministrations, pressing against your clit almost achingly, he knew you, he knew you so damn well.

“More, Javi, more,” you said and brought yourself back to his mouth, licking his lips, his circling went faster and you smiled contently against his kiss.

“Has he ever touched you like this, chiquita?” he asked under his breath and you shook your head as he dragged his fingers through your slit and into your cunt “has he ever made you this wet?”

“Oh, oh sh–shit, Javi,” you moaned and he bit your lower lip and moved back to your neck, his fingers curled inside you and he already knew where exactly to press to make you come undone on his hand, the heel of his palm pressed your clit and his fingers stretched you so deliciously it was really a wonder why you two had stopped fucking. “god, Brandon could never,” you mumbled as you bit his shoulder over his jacket, he bit your neck when you mentioned your boyfriend’s name and that was the last drop, your orgasm hit your belly and made your legs shake, you bit his jacket harder to muffle your moan as he helped you ride down your climax.

“C’mere,” he removed his hand from your panties and you whined softly at the loss of his touch, Javier pulled you from the center of the room to stand in front one foggy, yellowy window that barely allowed any light into the room “turn around,” he said, it wasn’t an order, he wasn’t like that, but in the heat of the moment he said things with such authority you barely contradicted him, you did and then realized what he wanted to do.

“Against the window? are you insane?” you frowned, and he gave you a hooded-eyed smile.

“You know me, baby, pull your panties off,” you saw him unbuckle his belt and unbutton his pants and with a teasing roll of your eyes you did. There had been a long time since you fucked in that room at all, Brandon found it too risky, but not your Javier Peña, for him this was delightful. You slid your skirt up and let it crumple around your waist “that’s my good girl, so fucking ready for me to fuck her,” Javier didn’t waste anytime and rolled down your panties, he gently kicked your feet to separate your legs and you leaned down as far as your surroundings allowed you. You felt his hands grip your hips, and you got ready for him to slide in when instead you felt his tongue flattening against your soaked folds.

“Shit,” you whimpered and dropped your head back, curving your back and pressing your pussy against his face, god he shouldn’t really be doing that, you were gone far too long already. The sudden moment of clarity soon went to shit when he spit on your pussy and stood up and with practiced dexterity he slid his cock inside you. You let out a small whimper as he stayed still for a few seconds and rounded his arm around your waist for leverage.

“I want you to scream my name, baby,” he whispered in your ear and you shivered under him, he started pounding into you and making your mouth produce the most dirty sounds you thought it could ever produce, “c’mon, preciosa, fucking scream,” you shook your head as he slid his hand under your blouse and bra and played as he could with your nipple, your moans and gasps grew louder and you tried, really tried to muffle your noises, you tried to bring your hand to your mouth but Javier nimbly moved the arm that embraced you and trapped both your hands with it, angling his hips to hit inside you harder and rougher, you moaned again, “louder, I want Brandon to hear you,” your breath hitched as you remembered your boyfriend and Javier chuckled behind you, thrusting into your cunt faster as he could “I want him to hear how his dear girl likes to be fucked,”

“Javi–Javier, I’m so close,” you clenched around him and he let out a small groan “more, more, I’m almost there,” you demanded, pressing your hips against his as he hit the small spot inside you that made your eyes roll inside your head.

“So fucking greedy, baby,” he said through gritted teeth, you felt his warm tongue licking the shell of your ear and you moaned again “what would people say if they knew you were such a slut for me?” Javier whispered in your ear and then bit your lobe, taking you to the edge and then dropping you off the cliff, you drowned the scream that was rising in your chest and instead let out a growl that made you sound like a feral creature which at the moment you pretty much were. Javier felt your walls clench around him, making it almost impossible to keep thrusting into you and it drove him off the cliff as well, cuming inside you and filling you with a familiar warm thickness.

The room was silent for a few seconds, as you were trying to recover from the orgasms you just had pulled out of each other. Then it filled with your panting and the ruffling of your clothes being straightened and put back where they were before that… slip.

“Shit,” you mumbled as Javier helped you button your blazer “we really shouldn’t have done this,” your eyes dropped to the floor, Javier said nothing for a few seconds, he stared at you, as if studying you, as if he was trying to bring himself to say something.

“Break up with him,” he spat, you frowned and looked at him in pure disbelief, who did he think he was? “I want you for me,” your frown only deepened, he for the first time since he had been your partner left you speechless “fuck, I get so jealous when I see you with that… with him,” he mumbled and you saw him actually doubt himself, “I think… I think I’m in love with you”

“Oh, fuck me,” you let out, amazed and happy that he had told you the words you were waiting to hear from him since god-knows-when. And sad and angry that you had to break Brandon’s heart like that.

“I think I just did,”

#javier peña #Javier Pena #javier peña x reader #javier peña fanfiction #javier peña fanfic #javier peña smut #narcos #narcos fanfic #narcos netflix #Pedro Pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #Jose Pedro Balmaceda Pascal #pedro pascal characters #prompt lists!#400 followers 🥳

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eclipixels · 3 years

Text

Saving Kaneki from going on that date with Rize

______________________________

The first time I had met him was at the school library. He had stumbled into my life, quite literally stumbled. He had tripped and fallen on top of me, knocking over most of the books from the fantasy section.

There he was, all shy with shining silver eyes and dark hair. He groaned and rubbed his head before immediately standing up and apologising, running back to an orange haired boy whom I assumed was his friend.

The next day, a Monday, it was going back to classes again. Most people were taking a break from everything and just going out since it was the weekend but I stayed in and read some fanfiction to release some stress. Dazai is good and all but sometimes you just need a brain break from all the high vocabulary and just read some cheesy love story written by a delusional 16 year old.

I had arrived to class early since it's nice when it's all silent and nobody is here. I sighed before taking out my textbooks and reading Sen Takatsuki's newest novel. I rested my chin on my palm as I engrossed myself into the pages of the book.

Suddenly, I noticed something from the corner of my eye, there was someone else here. It didn't take long for me to realize that it was the boy from the library yesterday.

He had 2 cups of coffee in his hand with one nervously held out towards me. I was a bit shocked since nobody had ever done a gesture like that to me before so I froze for a second before accepting the warm beverage.

"I'm really sorry I ran into you yesterday, I really didn't mean to, it was an accident and I didn't know where I was going, and um, I'm Kaneki Ken."

"It's alright. I didn't mind and you didn't have to get me this but thank you." I smiled politely.

"You're welcome and it really was no trouble. It's the least I could do to excuse my clumsiness." He shyly spoke.

"Would you like to sit down?" I asked as I noticed he was still standing in front of me.

"O-oh sure!" His eyes widened. He sat down next to me and pulled out his textbooks, mimicking the actions I had done prior to him arriving.

"Hey, is that Takatsuki's newest novel? How'd you get that? I didn't think it'd be out 'till next week!" The smile that lit up his face was something I'd never get used to and unbeknownst to me, would be the one I would slowly fall in love with.

"Oh, most shops have already had them shipped to them and are keeping them in storage until next week. A bookstore owner I know really well managed to sneak one out for me." I explained.

"Aw, no way! You're so lucky! Do you mind if I borrow it? I promise I'll give it back to you by tomorrow!" He exclaimed and I can swear I think I saw sparkles in his eyes.

"Um, Here, you can take it now since I finished it earlier in the morning." I handed the book to him.

Thus was the start of our friendship. Even though he was often busy with school more than me, (since he took more complex classes) he still had time to spend with me. It'd be small things from sitting silently next to me and doing his school work while I read any book that he had recommended to just going out for ice cream together in a nearby park.

Everyday he would seem to bring me a beverage whether it'd be my favorite coffee or something else. If he couldn't meet with me, he'd always have it delivered to my doorstep. It became a tradition for us.

Soon enough, I had met the orange haired boy that I had seen with Kaneki the day that I first met him and not long after had we also become friends.

Somehow, Hide and Kaneki managed to get me out of my apartment and took me out to get lunch with them. The three of us had become quite close.

Although I enjoyed my friendship with both of them, it had seemed that I had fallen in love with the dark haired boy and might I say fallen really hard. Like, cupid got drunk and shot me in the back, sending me flying into Kaneki's heart, face first into his adorableness.

His eyes told stories that I found familiarity in. It held the same gleam of a painful past, the same feeling I found in mine. It didn't take long for me to accept the fact that I had drowned myself in his aura, becoming truly, madly deep in love with Kaneki Ken.

Unfortunately Hide had figured this out and of course he tried to get me to confess and after what felt like centuries of persuading, he finally got me to go and confess.

Well, that was before now. Now, he had come to me with pitiful eyes, telling me that Kaneki had fallen for a shy, purple haired woman that he had met in a coffee shop, and that he had asked her out on a bit of a date, and that she had said yes. I couldn't process what was even coming out of his mouth.

Kaneki asking out a stranger? Impossible–

–But.. after awhile I looked up at Hide and saw that he still had the same downcast look on his face. I knew then that he wasn't lying, and that he was serious. I guess that Kaneki does not feel the same way I do. we'll, obviously he didn't. I felt myself go numb as I was being pulled into a hug by Hide but I didn't respond. He kept apologizing over and over again, telling me that Kaneki is an idiot to have chosen a stranger over the the girl who was there for him through the difficult times and shared almost everything with each other but, in my eyes, I was just the girl who was foolishly in love with a boy who would never look at her the way she looked at him.

Hide went on about how Kaneki must have been crazy not to like me back, and that kaneki and I were perfect for one another, and that Kaneki was just making a mistake but everything that came out of his mouth just felt like lies that only reminded me more and more of the reality, stomping harder on my already shattered heart.

Hide decided to take me to get some food to cheer me up. It wouldn't work but I accepted his kind request since I can at least try to get my mind off of it.

"Don't worry about it, Y/n! We're gonna have the bestest day you've ever experienced!" Hide exclaimed determined.

"Give it your best shot." I shrugged my shoulders.

"Just wait and see Y/n, it'll be fun. Now let's go!" Hide shouted.

Once we had arrived, Hide's face looked distraught and he immediately said we should go somewhere else. I found that very weird and out of the ordinary for him. That's when I noticed him staring at something and I followed his gaze only to be met with the shattering view.

"Oh." I muttered.

"That's why" he let out a sigh. "I'm sorry." He apologized.

There was Kaneki, across the street with a tall long purple haired girl who I assumed was the girl who he asked out.

"What do you mean? That doesn't matter to me. Let's just go inside anyway." I lied straight through my teeth, doing my best to seem unbothered by it.

"Are you sure? You don't seem like you're okay." Hide asked with worried eyes, concern evident on his face.

"No no, I'm fine" but my tone contradicted my words.

"Look y/n, you're hurt and upset but you don't have to force yourself to do this-" Hide gripped my shoulder only to be interrupted by my voice.

"I said it's okay, Hide. C'mon, I can handle this." I smiled.

I don't know why I'm doing this but it can't get any worse, can it?

Shit.. yes, yes it can and it's happening right now.

Kaneki sees us and makes his way over. His expression was shocked to say the least.

"Y/n? What're you doing here?" Kaneki asked.

"Oh um, Hide and I just decided to get some food." I stumbled the words out.

"..with Hide?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Yea." I pressed my lips together and rocked on my heels.

"Huh, interesting." He hummed. "Are you two out on a date?" His expression changed to bitter.

"Wait what? No way." I laughed, actually finding it funny he would think that. Even Hide snickered.

"oh.." He muttered.

"So, who's that?" I chocked out, referring to the violet haired girl.

"This is Rize." He introduced.

"Well it was nice to meet you! Excuse me I have to go now." I ran to the bathroom. Fuuuuuck that was so embarrassing. I wanna cry and scream at the same time.

I could overhear Hide and Kaneki still talking. I focused to hear a bit clearer and I immediately clasped my hands over my mouth as I heard Hide passive aggressively say, "Have fun on your date while y/n and I hang out and have fun all day. Bye Ken!"

Hide huffed before sitting down next to me. "Someone looks pissed." I mumbled.

"Who wouldn't I be pissed? God, he's so fucking dense. This is like when your two favorite characters who you ship don't end up together and one of them ends up with some other bitch." He ran his hand through his hair sighing.

"What did you say to him?" I asked.

"You'd scold me if I told you so I'm not telling you. Ugh, I can't believe I'm best friends with such a-" I stopped him mid sentence.

"Let it go, Hide." I put a hand on his shoulder.

"I won't talk about it anymore but I'm not letting it go." He huffed.

"Whatever but, did you notice something weird about her?" I asked.

"Uh, not really. What do you mean by weird?" He asked.

"Bro, I swear there's something fucking weird about that girl!" I exclaimed.

"She doesn't seem weird.. I just think he's ways out of her league." He explained.

"No no, there's just something.. I don't know. She gives off weird vibes." I stirred the straw in my drink.

"Hm, are you sure you aren't acting like this because.." Hide trailed off, smirking.

"I just care about him, it's not about how I feel and- stuff for him, y'know? It's not about that. I'm just worried about him." I expressed my concerns trying to not include my feelings into the equation.

"Call it whatever you want but you're jealous." He snickered.

"I've got an idea!" I exclaimed.

"Oh no-" He widened his eyes.

"I'll go with them!" I said.

"I don't think they'd let you." He furrowed his brows.

"I'll just sit at another table so they won't see me."

"Don't-"

"I PROMISE I won't ever do it again. Just this one time and if everything goes ok I'll never do it again." I put my hands together before Hide sighed in response.

I sat at a table far away from them but enough for me to see. They were talking but I couldn't make out what they were saying.

Kaneki was mostly likely rambling on about his favorite books. He's so cute when he makes those little gestures. Honestly, he could talk about where hot dogs come from and I'd still drool over how adorable he is.

Seggsy lesbian bitch- I mean Rize on the other hand was just doing the debby ryan and not even eating anything. That's kinda suspicious. Is she a vampire or something? Holy shit what if she's a ghoul?!

I almost didn't notice them leaving but I somehow catched up to where they were going. It was already a but dark out. They came to a stop and Kaneki was blushing furiously.

Wait..

Oh no

They leaned in..

Are they going to kiss? I don't think I can bear to watch that.

What happened next almost gave me a heart attack. She opened her mouth and was about to bite his shoulder. My fight or flight response immediately activated and before I knew it, I grabbed Kaneki's hand and ran.. His eyes widened in pure shock.

From the corner of my eye, I could see in the reflection of weird tentacles coming out of her as she wailed and chased after us. I didn't notice at first but soon enough I felt the blood trickle down my leg.

She managed to cut my leg. I wasn't that good at running and the gash made it even worse. I felt my legs giving out and I collapsed onto the concrete sidewalk. Everything felt kind of foggy and I barely remember what's even happening right now but I could feel that Kaneki somehow managed to carry me on his back and he ran to the nearest public area.

"Y/n! You're bleeding! We need to get you to the hospital right now!" Kaneki said as he frantically looked for his phone.

"Are you okay? Did she bite you?" I asked.

"No, I'm fine! You're the one hurt right now! Why are you worrying about me?" I could see the fear and concern in his eyes. For some reason I felt guilty for it but I felt warm inside knowing he cared.

"I'll be fine, it's just a cut. She was going to eat you! What was going to happen if she did?" I squeezed his hand.

"I'm okay now, aren't I? Thanks to you." He smiled, wiping away splattered blood from my cheek.

"You're welcome, Kaneki-san"

"I called Hide to come so he can help take you to the hospital to get your wound treated." He assured me.

"Its not a big deal." I tried to pretend I wasn't in extreme pain.

"It is" He sternly voiced.

"It's not" I spoke with the same tone.

"Don't argue back. I owe it to you after you saved my life."

"Fine but only because you said so."

After we arrived at the hospital, the doctor said it was just a small gnash, nothing severe. They patched me up and Kaneki insisted on coming along with me.

"You didn't have to come with me, Ken. I can manage on my own." I said as we entered my apartment.

"Oh and also, what're you doing?" I asked as he tugged on my jacket trying to get it off which he somehow managed to do.

"Y/n, you're my friend and you saved my life, I already told you I owe you." He sighed hanging up our coats.

"A friend, huh?" I smiled sadly. Back to pain it was again. Heartbreak isn't a hobby for me, it's a lifestyle. :')

"Y-yeah, well you're my friend aren't you?" He peered at me with doe eyes.

"Kaneki I really need to tell you something." I blurted.

"What is it?" He gulped.

"I.." I started but choked up.

"Uh?" He stepped closer. Dammit why is this so difficult.

"I love you." I whispered averting my eyes away. I couldn't dare to look at his face. After a moment of silence I looked up to see.. nobody? Where'd he go?

"Kaneki?? Where are you?" I shouted. Did he leave? Wow, couldn't he at least say it that he doesn't like me. I suddenly tripped over something and fell onto the floor, thankfully on top of a rug.

I groaned feeling a sharp pain in my abdomen from landing on something underneath. I slowly get up and look to see Kaneki. Kaneki. On the floor. wut.

"Eh? What the-???" I yelled in confusion. "Why are you on the God damn floor??" I frantically shouted.

"And are you crying? And texting Hide?" I ask seeing his lit up phone screen.

"N-no" He sniffled, turning his head so I couldn't see.

"Why are you crying, though?" I raised an eyebrow, wiping his tears with my thumb.

"It's just that I never thought you'd ever like me. Do you know h-how long I've had feelings for you?" He teared up even more.

"Why are you getting emotional?" I held his hand tighter.

"Oh my bananas y/n, I'm crying tears of joy! I'm so happy you like me back! I just thought you'd never like me back, that's why I went out with Rize to try and forget these feelings." He looked away from me with pink tinted cheeks feeling shameful.

"Kaneki! Why didn't you say anything?" I scolded light heartedly.

"You know I'm shy. How come you didn't?" He scrunched his nose. Adorable.

"Well I was! In fact I was planning on confessing on the day you asked that girl out" I glanced down while frowning, having a sour taste in my mouth.

"Y/n.. do you want to go out on a date with me?" He looked up at me.

"Of course I do and I wanted to be the one to ask!" I crossed my arms.

"Beat you to it." He smiled.

"Can I at least pick the date?" I asked.

"Errr sure but I want to go on a book date 'cause Hide said they're lame and I wanna prove him wrong." He narrowed his eyes.

"Sure." I sigh.

"Thank you, Y/n!" He launched himself at me, hugging me tightly.

"What for?" I laughed hugging him back.

"For saving me and for agreeing to going on a date with me" He whispered.

"I didn't have a choice when it came to liking you though, how could I not?" I replied back.

"May we.. stay like this." He requested while staring up at me with sparking glossy doe eyes. I gazed at his soft pink face and planted a cheste kiss on his cheek causing his breath to hitch.

The moment was innocent, delicate and serene... until Kaneki's phone dinged with a notification of a text from Hide. Y/n made a mental note to ask what he texted Hide behind her couch while Kaneki made a mental note to ask how the hell did she show up at the right moment when Rize tried to eat him.

—But only Hide knows the answer to those questions 💅

#kaneki ken #kaneki x reader #tokyo ghoul #tokyo ghoul x reader #kaneki ken x reader

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i-m-b-a-s-i-c · 3 years

Text

exes confront each other | ricky bowen

pairing: ricky bowen x reader

credits: this is inspired by/based off of @by-moonflower ‘s series. even if you’re not into seventeen, her characterization and banter is so well-written that it feels like you know these characters personally, so i encourage you to check it out

warnings: questionable writing and characterization, author has not watched season 2, semi-proofread

a/n: after almost a year of not posting, i sat down and wrote this in one night, so this may not be the best. please don’t kill me if anything here contradicts season 2, i haven’t watched it yet and may edit this after i do

the camera man sends you a sympathetic smile as you sit alone in a stool. the room feels desolate although a small crew frantically scurries along the edges of the room, ensuring nothing is out of place.

the commotion comes to a halt as the door opens and your ex slides into the stool across from you. 3, 2, 1, action.

[how did you meet?]

you:

ricky:

you: he was dating my best friend

ricky: well it sounds bad when you say it like that

you:

ricky: what the- why are you laughing

you: well it was bad, wasn’t it?

ricky:

you:

ricky: is she still mad

you: not at me

———————

ricky: so i had been dating Gi-

ricky:

ricky: are we allowed to say names

you: we probably shouldn’t

ricky: right. anyway, so i had been dating her best friend for 2 weeks and she brought me back to her apartment-

you: our apartment

ricky: their apartment. i didn’t know she had a roommate at the time

you: you figured it out pretty quickly though

ricky: i made the mistake of walking into what i thought was the bathroom without knocking

you: it was my room

ricky: it wasn’t like you were changing or anything

you: yeah just dancing around my room

ricky:

you: of course that was the one day i forgot to lock my door

ricky:

you:

ricky: i’m glad you did

———————

ricky: we didn’t start dating until months later

you: way after they broke up

ricky:

you: she never told me why you broke up in the first place

ricky: it was mutual

you:

ricky: the initial attraction was gone

you:

ricky: and i had feelings for someone else

[why did you break up?]

ricky:

you: we were going different places

ricky: quite literally

you: i was moving across the world

ricky: and i stayed here

you:

ricky: i would’ve gone with you, you know?

you: i couldn’t do that to you

ricky:

you: you had all your friends and family here

ricky:

you: you were following your dreams

ricky: i could’ve done that with you wherever you went

you: it wouldn’t have been the same

ricky: it wasn’t the same without you here either

[what did you love most about each other?]

you: oh gosh

ricky: is it really that hard to think of something

you: no that’s not it

ricky:

you: i just love you so much, it’s hard to pick just one thing

ricky: love?

you: what

ricky: you said love, not loved

you: you know what i mean

———————

you: i loved how you talked

ricky: i have no idea what that means

you: like when you were excited about something that happened that day and your whole face would light up

ricky:

you: your eyes would shine and your smile was so big

ricky:

you: and you’d ramble on and on about the most trivial things

ricky:

you: but they were important to you and that made them important to me

ricky:

you: it felt nice to know that you wanted to tell me everything. it was easy to love you

ricky:

you: are you okay

ricky: i was always worried i was being annoying

you: you never annoyed me

——————

ricky: i loved your duality

you: i didn’t think you knew what that word meant

ricky: oh shut up

you: also, huh

ricky: well, if you’d let me explain

ricky: you made me want to talk to you, but i also wanted to listen and know everything about you

you:

ricky: you could match my energy and calm me down too

you:

ricky: and you were funny

you:

ricky: we would stay up laughing for hours and we’d always have to cover each other’s mouths to not wake up the neighbors

you: i should’ve mentioned that i loved how you made me laugh

ricky: i am pretty funny

you: and so humble too

ricky:

you:

ricky:

you: why are you looking at me like that

ricky: i love your laugh

you: you said love, not loved

ricky: i know

[what did you hate most about each other?]

ricky:

you: it’s ok, ricky

ricky: almost everything about you was perfect to me

you: emphasis on almost. go ahead

ricky: i hated how you left

you:

ricky: not even that you left but you didn’t let me go with you

you: ricky-

ricky: you made that decision for me without even asking how i felt. you just decided for both of us and left without looking back

ricky: you did that a lot actually but i never thought it would end with you leaving

you: i’m sorry, i just wanted the best for you

ricky: i know, it’s ok

———————

ricky: your turn

you: i don’t know what to say

ricky: oh come on, there had to be something

you: i was so in love with you, all of you

ricky: there had to be at least one major flaw to make you leave

you: i didn’t want to leave you, ricky

ricky: then why did you?

———————

you: i hated how indecisive you used to be

ricky: i can’t decide how i feel about that

you:

ricky:

you: i’m so done with you

ricky: don’t act like i can’t see that smile

you: anyway, as i was saying

you: you could never make a choice from what you wanted for dinner to even whether or not we should actually date. it felt like i was responsible for maintaining this relationship, i guess that’s why i always needed to make the decisions

ricky: i never thought about that, i’m sorry

you: i know, it’s ok

[do you think you could try again?]

you: yes

ricky: yes

you: jinx, you owe me a coke

ricky:

you:

ricky: would you want to get lunch after this? just so i can buy you that coke, of course

you: that sounds nice

you: but only for the coke

ricky: only for the coke

p.s. it wasn’t only for the coke

#ricky bowen x reader #ricky bowen imagine #ricky bowen #ricky bowen x y/n #ricky bowen blurb #ricky bowen angst #ricky bowen fluff #hsm the series #hsmtmts #hsmtmts x reader

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asexualone · 3 years

Text

cw: mentions of seggs and self-ple@ süre

Signs I should have known I was ace: M*sturb*t¡0n edition

Before I dive into this rant, can we all just agree that even asexuals m-bate? Yes, even girls. Idk and idc when or how or why society ever began to believe that only straight, allosexual men are allowed to do it, I just don't want to see that crap on my blog, okay? Great.

Now, one might argue about the exact time I started "engaging in self pleasure".

I remember exploring my body since I was 8, I don't know if that counts. But I only actually began "getting that pleasure" when I was almost 15 that I learned what the thing I had been doing was called.

Ever since then, I've had all sorts of "experiences" regarding how I see m**tûrb*t¡on.

For example, you know how I started reading fanfiction almost two years ago. And I'm guessing you know what kind of ~f i l t h~ can be found there.

I read all about these h0rny teens tossing one off while thinking of someone!!

Honestly, I thought it was far-fetched, written to attract readers because THERE'S NO WAY-

until.... I got on Omegle a couple of months ago and had a brief, highly uncomfortable conversation with this dude who didn't know what asexuality meant. After I explained it to him, he went, "but do you m-bate?"

And I'm there like.... Not that that's any of your business, but yea? What's that got to do with anything?

He said, "well who do you think of when you...?"

I'm sitting there, staring at my screen like.... huh?

I said as much, "no one? Who tf am I supposed to think of?"

Then he went on about p0rn, and didn't I watch and imagine myself being in the place of the girl on screen?

I'm like what?!?! No, why would I?

Needless to say, I see that allosexuals don't watch p**n to m-bate by listening to the sounds or just projecting that feeling of ar0üsal. No, allos actually picture themselves in those videos. Good heavens...

Listen, I don't shame anyone, ever. Otherwise, me making this post would contradict everything.

It was just a shock for me to learn that, that's all. Is it really okay to picture someone you know... in bed with you? Or is it like, what they don't know doesn't hurt them?

I have tried it, trust me. But the second I attempt to picture someone else touching me, it's like turning a switch off. I could never. What does work for me, is the feeling. Focusing on my senses, and getting that stress-relief. P**n only works when I'm watching a sole person and projecting what they're feeling into my own body.

But yeah, this should have been a major sign towards my sexuality for a couple of years. I just didn't know I was supposed to feel that way about self-pl**süre.

Meh, better late than never I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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nobutfredweasleytho · 3 years

Text

YOU JUST DON’T LISTEN(F.W)

Summary: Fred’s ex girlfriend writes him a letter to explain the how him using her wrecked her emotionally.

Warnings: angst, like a lot of angst, depressed Y/N, mentions of self doubt, a little swearing, mentions of parents not loving correctly, used reader. Let me know if I missed anything.

A/N: Major thank you to Gabriella @onlyfreds for being an amazing person and encouraging me to write whatever this mess is. I am forever grateful to you

(The font is terrible Im sorry im just getting used to working on tumblr)

Fred Weasley checked the muggle clock on his nightstand. 10:30 AM. His mom will call him for breakfast anytime now. He has been awake for quite some time if he can even count the 30 minutes he tried to sleep but couldn’t, not when every time he tries to close his eyes his mind and eventually dreams are clouded by her. By the last time he looked at her, how devastated she looked, How her face was wet from her tears and her eyes bloodshot red, but the thing Fred will never be able to forget is her voice. How raw and vulnerable she sounded while saying the most horrible thing’s anyone has ever said to him, but he can’t blame her, he has no one to blame but himself because in the end it was he who caused all of this and now its come to bite him in the ass. He hears the door open and his twin brother George enters.

“Mom says breakfast is ready and she wants you downstairs. She says she’ll drag you herself if you don’t show up again today.”

“Tell her I’m not hungry and I’ll come grab a bite later.” I really don’t feel like being surrounded by other people right now. Not in this pathetic state I’m in. Besides it will take me willpower I don’t have to not hex Ron into oblivion.

“Well she will not take no for an answer and I wont either. What’s done is done now and you’ll have to face the world someday so start with your own family because everyone down there is worried sick about you and the least you can do is show your face once in a while so they know you haven’t died of starvation or sleep deprivation.” George has worry written all over him and I’m sure the rest of the family has it too. I feel even more like shit for worrying them.

“Fine. But I come back here if she is mentioned are we clear?”

“We weren’t gonna mention Y/N anyway now lets go moms worried sick for your dumbass.”

Breakfast was going smoothly with Ginny and Ron being exited for Quidditch season, Harry and Bill discussing the unfortunate events of the Triwizard tournament last year, dad asking Hermione about a rubber duck whatever that is, but the most shocking thing is mom asking me and George about the joke shop products. George is doing most of the talking but still the fact that shes even asking is awesome. I was finally feeling peaceful this whole winter break until I heard a hoot outside the window.

“I thought it was Tuesday but since mail is here does it mean its Friday already? Oh how fast time is going.

“No Arthur honey you are right it is Tuesday, Bill or George can one of you see if that owl has the owners name attached to it and bring whatever letter he has here to see who is it for.”

Bill got up from his seat and went to the window next to the countertop to look at the mystery owl. “Do we even know a Y/N Y/L/N?”

The room went quiet. The only thing that could be heard was the owls hoot asking for its treat. Bill seemed not to realise this as he took the letter from the owl, gave him a treat and sent it on its way.

“To Fred Weasley from Y/N Y/L/N… Who’s Y/N is she the girl you’ve been crying over this whole time huh Freddie?” Bill chuckled but I just grabbed the letter. I had no time to even be mad at him because once again my mind fogs up with only her. I couldn’t help but feel relieved and the happiest I felt in a long time. She has forgiven me. Y/N forgave me. That has to be it. Why else would she send me a letter?

“I had a great time with you guys but there’s important matters for me to attend so I have to go to now. Thanks mom the breakfast was amazing as always.” And with that I sprinted towards my room, locked the door and examined the letter in my hands. It was a bunch of them in here. I went to mine and George’s worktable threw some papers that were on top of it to make room for these letters and carefully opened the envelope.

The first thing that I grabbed was a photo. It was a polaroid of me and Y/N on the Gryffindor common room. Happiness filled my heart when I started remembering this night. I looked at the back of the polaroid and surely enough there was a writing on it.

Fred and Yn on the Gryffindor common room at 1 AM the night she turned 17. Listening to ABBA’s “Dancing Queen”. Picture taken by major 3rd wheel George Weasley.

Tears filled my eyes when I remember this night. It was the night I looked at her the way I always should have. Not as a replacement of someone who didn’t care about me.

The next one was also a polaroid photograph but this one I don’t remember being taken. It’s a picture of Y/N teaching me how to play the guitar. I can make up that we are in her dorm but not more as the picture is taken in black and white. I look at the back and surely this one also has a writing on it but the handwriting doesn’t look familiar at all.

A drunken Y/N accompanied by a even drunker Fred trying to play the guitar in the middle of the night. If I fail my charms exam tomorrow I’m killing you both but right now you two look adorable. Picture taken by Cho Chang.

The third one is an actual letter. I chuckle looking at the handwriting. Always so precise and not even one line out of place. I always thought Y/Ns handwriting always contradicts her hot headed persona but it’s actually really cute. I start reading the letter and my heart stops.

Dear Freddie,

I can only imagine the shock that receiving a letter from me would cause you right now especially after our last conversation.

But I have a lot to get off of my chest and I wont be able to move on if I haven’t said it all. Call me a coward but I was really scared to ask you to meet me so I can say it in person, but maybe that’s what I have always been. A coward. A coward because I get scared when someone wants to enter my life, a coward because I hate trying new things at the expense of failing, a coward because I should be able to confront people who brought darkness and sadness to my life.

But one thing I will admit Fred Weasley is that I wasn’t a coward when It came to loving you. It was the first time that I let someone come into my life and heart the way you did, and it will probably be the last. Throughout our “relationship” if you can even call it that as it was more of you customizing me to be her, to be someone I’m not. But that’s why you even talked to me is it, because I reminded you of her.

The signs were right in front of me and I feel stupid enough not to have seen them. But I guess people are right when they say love is blind. Love is such a funny thing to me as the first time I experienced the right kind of love was through you. But that was me creating stuff in my head. You didn’t love me no, you loved the idea of me. But I loved you. I loved you more than anything or anyone I have ever loved, I loved everything about you. But you just don’t listen. You don’t listen to anyone around you. Not George, not your other siblings, not Lee or any of your other friends for that matter, not your professors, but most importantly you don’t listen to me.

You didn’t listen when I told you that the love my parents gave me was only because I reminded them of my brother, the love my old friends back home gave me was one of interest. Everywhere I go no matter who I talk to no one will love me for me. I came to accept that until I met you.

You were funny and crazy and brave and oh so gorgeous. You were basically everything I looked for in… well everything. In a friend or in a partner it doesn’t matter. I thought you saw me for who I am. A broken teenager with issues but that at the end of the day was deserving of love. Oh how wrong I have been but no more wrong than you. You knew this but you just didn’t listen.

That makes us both horrible people now does it. Me who thought you were some kind of savior or some kind of saint and selfishly wrapped myself around your love and you who used me because I remind you of your ex girlfriend who broke your heart. But mine is excused I feel like and yours isn’t.

You would have kept me going for who knows how long just so you can live your imaginations you had for someone else.

Did you think about her the first time we slept together?

Was I not enough for you Freddie?

Was I too clingy too soon?

Is it my hot temper that gets the best of me?

So many questions will be left unanswered on my end because frankly, I never want to speak of you again. Sure I am deprived of love but I will not take it if its not directed directly at me.

I still care about you and will continue to support you and George on whatever you set your mind into. I was waking through Diagon Alley last week and saw this little store with a “for sale” sign. It’s right in the middle of Diagon Alley. I hate how my first thought went that you would have loved it but I seem to do that a lot recently.

I’ll get dressed and think would Fred love this skirt or this shirt.

I start applying lipstick and I’ll think will Fred love this color.

I start eating and I’ll think does this look good enough that Fred would’ve stolen a piece of it when I’m talking to Ginny.

I don’t even know why I am telling you this. How pathetic I’ve become clinging into someone that doesn’t want me.

Anyway I’ve probably bored you enough with my ranting but I wouldn’t have been able to move on unless I said everything that felt heavy on my heart. I also attached some photos I thought you’d like to keep seeing as now you can see yourself with Kayla without having the burden to be near me.

Say hi to your siblings and Harry for me.

Have a nice life,

Y/N

#harry potter #fred x y/n #fred weasley series #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley #fred weasley angst #george weasley #hogwarts #fred and goerge weasley #weasley family #sadnees #i hate this

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marshmallow-phd · 3 years

Text

Gravity

Genre: Angst, Unrequited Love

Pairing: Junmyeon x Reader

A/N: This was basically just a therapy write.

What is worth? It is neither tangible nor seeable. It doesn’t have a body or a shell. Yet, the endless chase to catch it, to hold it captive, is a never ending disease that eats away at the brain and tears apart the heart. It’s only descriptor is feeling. A judgement. Something either is or isn’t. When it's an object in question, the call for worth is passive, innocent. It’s wanted or it's not. The deterioration comes into play when the worth is applied to a person.

Kim Junmyeon was worth the world.

With a smile that could chase away a storm and a heart too good and pure for the human populace, he was truly worth more than the world. He was worth more than you deserved.

Not only was his face kind, but it was handsome. Beautiful, even. Candid photos were museum worthy masterpieces. There was a gentleness, a softness to his eyes and cheeks that contradicted the sharpness of his jaw and the strength of his body. His laugh was infectious and his mind as vast and deep as the ocean. The sum of his whole was worth so much.

But you were not worthy of such a person. You weren’t as stunning as a sunset over the mountains or as extraordinary as a new discovery. You were simply… you. Staring from afar, admiring but never touching.

You wished you could be worthy. You wished you could be special enough - good enough to be with him. Pretty enough would be something decent to settle for. But you were invisible. A person on the sidelines. Out of the spotlight. You were an admirer - not one to be admired.

“You’re doing it again.”

You blinked, your attention torn away from the spot where Junmyeon was standing, laughing and chatting with a few of his seniors. Kyungsoo, who sat to your left at the small table in the entertainment building’s cafe, didn’t even look up from the script he was currently reviewing. He’d only been given it the day before and was still considering if he wanted the part that was being offered to him.

Your gaze dropped to the opened yet untouched notebook lying in front of you on the somewhat sticky surface. Someone must have spilled their syprup-y coffee and didn’t do the best job at cleaning it up. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Without moving his head, Kyungsoo looked at you over the rim of his glasses. Even though you were sure you were nothing more than a blur to his eyes at the moment, he could always see right through you. “If you keep staring at him like that, you’re going to give yourself away.”

The ultimate nightmare. The humiliation of being found out. The sweet but awkward rejection that you knew would follow. With his laugh still ringing in your ears, you forced yourself to tune Junmyeon out.

Pushing his glasses up his nose with his middle finger, Kyungsoo straightened and closed the script. “We can go somewhere else, if that would help.”

You wanted to argue no. That you weren’t a coward. That you weren’t going to run and hide simply because you looked at him like he was the night sky while you were stuck on the ground. You used to have better control of yourself. You used to be able to hide it better. But lately, it had only gotten worse.

And you were a coward.

“Yeah. Maybe one of the practice rooms is empty.”

“There’s usually one.”

After gathering up your things, you followed Kyungsoo out of the cafe, stealing a final glance. Junmyeon didn’t so much as twitch in your direction. It wouldn’t have been surprising if he hadn’t even realized that you were there in the cafe for the past half hour.

Kyungsoo settled into one corner of the worn navy blue couch while you squeezed into the other. Not speaking a word, he went back to reading the script. That was a nicety of your friendship. Comfortable silence was more than readily available when needed. He didn’t push or give unasked for advice. He was an ear to listen and a presence to take in when you didn’t want to be alone.

You stared down at the notebook in your lap where your next story ideas were supposed to be filling the pages. But nothing was coming out. Not even the vague pictures you’d had earlier this morning. The only things being called to the paper were the sentences held in the invisible tears you refused to shed. Words of wishes and frustrations swirled around inside the tiny droplets, every letter as heavy as lead. Your cruel mind kept echoing at you the conversation that had constricted the air in your lungs.

Two days ago, you’d accidentally overheard a drama staff worker jokingly say that Junmyeon and his current co-star seemed awfully close, more than merely friends. Stomach lurching, you ran to the nearest bathroom. Nothing came out but almost fifteen minutes of deliberate breathing had gone by before you emerged again. Kyungsoo was quick to dismiss the comment after barely three words from you. The effect, however, still lingered.

Despite the history of your intrusive thoughts, you wanted to believe that you could be good enough. That you were worthy of being beside someone like Junmyeon. His co-costar was stunning, even in real life. Someone who didn’t need photoshop to draw out gasps of awe and astonishment. Someone you most certainly couldn’t compete with in any race.

You weren’t asking for much. Just to be able to hold his hand, your fingers interlaced between his own. The fantasy you allowed yourself to indulge in at times wasn’t a grand gesture or a modern fairytale. You wanted simplicity. The smaller moments that could mean so much. Mundane, to some eyes.

Warm sun rays leaked through the closed blinds over the living room windows. A clock on the wall ticked away the meaningless minutes. Sometimes soft music hummed in the background, sometimes there was nothing but silence. Junmyeon would lay across the length of the couch with you wrapped around his side. His fingers would absentmindedly caress your shoulder or arm. In his other hand was a book, held open by his thumb and pinky. Your own hand drifted through his hair while he read aloud.

The two of you had dozens of endless conversations about books. About the ones you loved and the ones you hated. About deeper meanings and the reflections of life. His love of literature - from the celebrated classics to the obscure unknown - had been what initially drew you in. Everything else was what made you stay.

A muscle in your hand cramped. The peaceful scene faded from your eyes. The page was now filled with barely legible, ink-smeared words. You’d written the entire scenario out, along with your heart, without even realizing it.

In a panic, you ripped the paper from its spiral hold, crumpled it up, and tossed it to the trash can across the room. It missed.

“I doubt whatever you wrote was that bad,” Kyungsoo murmured. He read the final few lines of the script and closed it.

“It wasn’t,” you admitted bitterly. “But I shouldn’t have written it.” You described the scene to him while your eyes stayed trained on the loose thread twirling between your fingers.

He sighed. “You’re never going to tell him, are you?”

“I can’t.”

“You can. You’re just stopping yourself.”

You scoffed. “Why would I deliberately set myself up like that? Break me the rest of the way?”

Kyungsoo stared at you, long and hard, his expression blank to those who couldn’t read the tell-tale signs that his thoughts were in overdrive. “You’re really hurting, aren’t you?”

You sniffed, though no tears were yet forcing their way to the surface. “Most days.”

“Then walk away.”

“I can’t.” Your voice broke - just like your heart. The world blurred when you shook your head. “I can’t… simplify it. But-- It’s like I was this stupid lump of rock drifting aimlessly through space, content with my life. Then suddenly, I came across this brilliant star that shined so brightly and… we collided. And now I’m stuck in his orbit. But he just keeps on spinning while my whole world had changed completely. He’s… my gravity. I don’t know anything else anymore.”

“Maybe it’s time to find your own orbit.”

Afraid it might crack again, your voice was barely a whisper. “I don’t know how.”

The door creaked open and your heart leapt. Junmyeon stuck his head inside. Had he overheard everything?

“There you are! I turned away for a second and suddenly you two weren’t in the cafe anymore.”

He’d… He’d seen you? In the cafe?

“It was too loud,” Kyungsoo lied, covering up for you like he always did.

“It’s always too loud for you,” Junmyeon teased. Then his face morphed into that leader-esque expression. “We need to head to rehearsal. You’re welcome to join us,” he nodded to you.

“No, that’s okay,” you said quickly in response. “I have a writer’s meeting.” No, you didn’t, but space felt like the right choice at the moment. You tried not to focus on the lack of disappointment coming from the direction of the door.

“Maybe next time.” Junmyeon slapped the side of the door. “Let’s go, Soo.”

You were actually the first one on your feet, muttering goodbyes to both of them and then walking down the hall perhaps a little too fast.

You didn’t allow your mind to think the whole way home. Every action was done in automatic mode. Only the minimal amount of awareness was used. But when the apartment door clicked behind you, when the near darkness wrapped you up, when the silence crept in and the empty couch mocked you… you broke.

Knees buckling from under you, the cold hard floor came closer and you didn’t leave that spot just inside the room as the tears and sobs crashed out in waves.

This was what you hated the most. The breakdowns that came with no excuse. They were built up by your own mind, by your intrusive thoughts. You tortured yourself with what you could never have. The attacks were random and it was only recently that you had learned to hold them in long enough until you were safe within your own walls. One time, you hadn’t made it. Kyungsoo had been there to pat your shoulder.

Kyungsoo. He was right.

That clarity was coming through as the tears dried and your breathing evened out again. You needed space. You needed to separate yourself from what wasn’t good for you and not see him. Not even have the temptation to.

This was going to hurt like hell.

The office somehow looked smaller with the bare walls. Since the day you moved in, you tried to liven it up, give it character, make it reflect the interests you loved. How were you supposed to write if this place felt like a stifling corporate desert, dry of any creativity?

Not that you ever actually wrote in this twelve by eight space. This place had been reserved for meetings and other usually boring necessities. You didn’t know the next time a budget meeting or an email check would be conducted here. You could be back in a few months and move back in as if you never left. Or someone else could take over. Only time would tell.

The box that currently had your attention was nearly full. You’d have to come back for the rest. There wasn’t much left, anyway. You took another look around to see if there was anything else you could do at the moment. The monitors were black, the tower underneath - so much smaller than the one you’d had as a kid - was powered off, and the chair that was aligned just so to your favored adjustments was pushed into the gray desk. Saying goodbye to this place really did hurt.

But you needed to do this.

And yet, you felt like you were drowning, being dragged deeper into the black water. Your lungs were screaming for relief.

“You’re really leaving?”

Your shoulders stiffened. At first, you didn’t look up at him. You weren’t sure what to say to him. Being here… it was the last place you expected him to be today. Kyungsoo would have told him, but you wouldn’t have waited around for him to appear.

“Hi, Junmyeon.” You folded up the top of the box, overlapping the pieces so it would stay shut in transport.

“I thought you liked it here?”

“I love it,” you confessed. “But I- I need to go home for a little while.”

“Are you homesick?”

“Something like that.” Definitely some version of sick.

He nodded. “Will you be gone long?” His eyes drifted over the holes in the walls leftover from the frames that used to hang in front of them.

“I don’t know.” You shifted your weight from one foot to the other. This was…. You should go. Pushing your fingers under the box, you started to lift it to take it home.

“Do you have to go?”

The question stalled you. Confused, the box went back down on the desk. “Why are you here, Junmyeon?”

He shrugged, though it didn’t shake off the stiffness in his shoulders. His hands were stuffed in his pockets, his arms all the way to his wrists covered up by the sleeves of his shirt. Lately he had been rolling them up. You wondered what had changed today. “You’re our friend.”

Friend.

Friend. Friend. Friend.

The word rang over and over like a declaration of war. Our friend.

The smart thing to do would have been to nod, say goodbye, and leave. But - instead - you opened your mouth.

“I will always be your friend.”

That didn't make him smile like you would have thought. “So, then why do you have to leave?”

You rubbed your eyebrow, fighting within yourself. You lost.

“Have you ever had a friend so head over heels for someone that won’t even look at them twice? But they don’t care? Because as long as the person they’re looking at is happy, then they’re happy. Even if your friend is completely miserable in the process. Because they no longer care about their own self. They just keep looking at the other person, doing anything that entails that they’re still happy.” You swallowed thickly to try and keep your voice steady. By your sides, your hands were trembling at this roundabout confession. “And you want to shake them. You want to tell them to get out. Because as long as they stick around, they won’t look at one else. No one else exists. Well, this is me. Getting out.”

The frown on Junmyeon’s face deepened as he let your words sink in. “Who is it? Will you tell me?”

No. Because this was enough of an admittance. Because it was time to find your own sense of gravity.

So, without a word, you picked up the box and left the office.

Waiting for you when you came back was the scene you had written in the practice room that day, flattened out but still wrinkled as it laid on the desk.

#exo #kim junmyeon x reader #kim junmyeon #kim joonmyeon #suho #suho x reader #exo oneshot #exo drabble #exo angst #exo unrequited love #kpop

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solarviolet · 3 years

Text

secrets • sirius black

a secret is finally revealed.

word count : 931

warnings : flirting, relationships, kissing (let me know if i've missed anything else)

a/n : this feels so rubbish but i'm posting this anyway. (i haven't written in so long so everything feels weird for me and i kind of hate this) but anyways this is for you sof @gxtitobxby ily <3

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

sitting outside the castle, you read your favourite book. a warm breeze wafts by, cooling and warming you up simultaneously.

all the students are outside, taking advantage of the beautiful weather. sitting on the grass, you smile and flip through your book. you're in a daze, heavily focused on your book when you hear footsteps coming towards you.

lifting your head up, you spot smith and sirius heading towards your way. rolling your eyes, you shake your head with a smirk on your face, already knowing what's about to unfold.

ever since you transferred to hogwarts, smith has been flirting with you. constantly. not one moment has he left you alone. you ignore his silly flirting but he won't stop.

grabbing your bookmark, you put it into your book, ensuring that your place isn't lost. getting up you lean against the tree, arms crossed. lazily looking out at the crowds of students. you hear smiths voice before you even see his face.

"hey! hey y/n, there you are pretty girl"

"i've been looking all over for you"

you can see his face much clearly now and he has a stupid smirk on his face. a devilish twinkle in his eyes as he looks down at you. he leans on the tree you're up against and gazes at you. sirius is not too far behind him and he stands in front of you and smith once he catches up.

letting out a tiresome sigh, you look up at smith.

"what do you want smith? what silly flirting game are you going to act out on me this time?"

it's pointless to even ask, you know he does the same stupid thing every time. he flirts with you and you laugh and ignore him. walking away when he doesn't give up.

smith groans "c'mon babe, don't be like that. i just want talk to you, maybe even convince you to come on a date with me?" he asks you with a hopeful look on his face.

shaking your head, you laugh at him, wondering why he thought trying again was a good idea. especially considering the multiple times you've rejected his advances towards you.

"smith i've told you this like a million times. i'm not interested in you. what's so hard about that to grasp"

your voice is tired but teasing. sirius begins to laugh at smith and his actions. "c'mon man, just let it go, she's never going to agree to your date. you need to move on"

nodding your head at sirius, you agree with his words. he sneakily sends a wink at you, making sure smith doesn't see it. his little action putting a tiny smile on your face.

smirking at smith, you stand up straight, looking him the eye. "smith, give it up. you're just not my type. plus i'm not looking to date anyone right now"

little did anyone know, but you were already in a relationship. a well kept secret between you and your man. it was easy enough to keep as when you interacted with him, you kept it casual, staying friendly.

you knew with time that the relationship would be exposed and it would be soon. hoping that it would put a stop to smith's stupid flirting. smith lets out a frustrated groan which widens your smirk.

"flirt with me one more time smith and i'll break your face in"

you speak to him seriously but you have a smile on your face which contradicts your words.

at that moment sirius speaks up. whistling lowly, he smiles down at you.

"that's my girl"

"my pretty little girl"

he slowly claps his hands which makes your face heat up. you look at smith and watch the confusion settle into his eyes. sirius wraps his arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer, while laughing at smiths face.

you giggle as the realisation settles on his face. his eyes go wide and his mouth opens in shock.

"y-y-you're DATING HIM??" he squeaks the words out, not being able to speak properly

sirius smirks at him as his fingers twirl a piece of your hair around it. he cocks his head to the side "you see smith, this pretty girl here is all mine. all mine"

"i told you to give it up the first time you flirted with her"

"i kept saying 'smith she's not the type of girl who will go for you' but you didn't listen to me"

smith just stares at the both of you, not moving or even uttering a word.

"y'know smith, i did tell you i wasn't interested in you multiple times. you just didn't listen and now you look like a fool"

"i-i can't believe it, you were dating HIM all along"

sighing, you nod your head. "yeah, nobody needed to know, so we kept it a secret when i transferred here"

"wow, just wow"

"well it's all in the open now, no more hiding for the both of you?"

sirius laughs at smith and nods his head "yes, yes no more hiding"

sirius leans down and cups your face in his hands, moving to press a soft kiss on your lips. which makes you giggle and press your lips onto his much harder, not allowing him to move away from you.

a few minutes later, he pulls back and nuzzles your nose with his. "that's my girl, my beautiful girl"

he murmurs towards you while pressing a kiss to your temple.

you can now relax and breathe a sigh of relief. finally your secret is revealed.

no more hiding.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

if you'd like to be added to my taglist it's here <3

taglist • @anchoeritic @barneswidow @anywherebuthere @izzyyy-1 @weasleysbitch2 @sweeterthansammy @anonymousmalfoy @slytherclawbitch @ashlovesthemarauders @livvysnaps

#sirius black imagine #sirius black x reader #sirius black fluff #sirius x reader #sirius imagines #harry potter imagine #marauders imagine #marauders fluff #harry potter fluff

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chibiwritesstuff · 3 years

Note

heyya yaaaa~! I just finished reading all of your works and lemme tell you, it’s all so nicely written! keep on going and don’t forget to take breaks when you need it, hm? alright, me stating facts about you and your writing talent aside— may I request lilia, floyd, ruggie and silver? Angst with a happy ending please? You can make it angst due to a misunderstanding or sumn. but oh well of course! that’s only if you don’t mind. Take your time dear, it’s not good to force yourself alright? bye~!

I see you saw the note that even I can’t find anymore that Lilia always gets a free pass on my 3 character limit XD. Thank you so much! I have long ways to be a decent writer but I’m glad you found my works nice. The one with Lilia is actually based on my own experience at work and I was told that’s an anxiety attack so uh... Also, I do kinda have to force myself or I’ll just keep focusing on work and not have time for myself which is writing.

(I swear all characters are treated equally and totally no favoritism... oh who am I kidding? Hail Lilia)

Warning(s): Mentions of an anxiety attack on Lilia’s part.

Now, let’s enter this twisted wonderland~

At first, he thought you just need something for Jade which he doesn’t mind. Everybody needs help once in a while.

But lately you two have pretty much stopped seeing each other.

Anytime he asks the trouble trio, they always respond that you’re with Jade.

Excuse me, if you wanted to break up with him just tell it straight to his face?!

He’s honestly hurt though. He thought you two are hitting it off really well.

Once he confronts you about it, you’re in the kitchen of Monstro Lounge.

“Wait, what are you doing?” He looked so confused and enamored of your look with an apron on.

“Ruggie, I love you and everything but I’m in the middle of a shift right now.” You immediately replied as you see Azul tapping his wristwatch.

“You work here?!” He jerked back in surprise. “I thought you are having a tryst with Jade!”

Cue to you and Azul spit taking (away from the food, of course, you ain't unsanitary) while Floyd burst out laughing and Jade chuckling.

Yeah, turns out you’re the current cook in the lounge to save up some money to buy him a gift for your anniversary.

Psh, he knows that. He’s just testing you… yeah.

Feel free to tease him about it since he used to do it to you anyway.

Okay, surely you just need Vil for a question or two, right?

You keep making excuses to get out of his hair lately and he doesn’t like it at all.

Yet whenever Rook calls for you because Vil asked for it, you’re suddenly available.

His mood swings are worse than a pregnant woman’s so you better explain quickly.

“Floyd! I finally found you.” You greeted him three weeks after you two last have an actual conversation.

“Can’t talk right now, I’m busy. Why don’t you go back to Vil?” He snapped at you as he began walking away.

You merely blinked at his reaction and shrugged. “Okay, you gave me the go signal so don’t you go blaming me for it.”

“That wasn’t permission! Get back here and pay attention to me!” He pouted and shook you violently. “Why do you always pay attention to Vil? I thought I’m your boyfriend?!”

“Well, my sense of fashion is wack so I thought I’d ask an expert.” You struggled to respond as you tried to hand over a box which made him stop shaking you. “Vil hooked me up to get these for you after being ordered around to do things… Happy anniversary… oh god I feel sick…”

“Eh?” He opened the box to reveal the Tenebres brand of shoes that he’s been wanting. “Shrimpy, thank you!!!”

Yeah, have fun trying to hold that nausea in because this eel ain't ready to let go just yet.

As much as Lilia is a great person to hang out with, he can be quite neglectful on certain things because of having too much fun.

You don’t show it that much but you do get anxiety attacks when you get surprised. While not severe it’s still quite a scary moment.

It doesn’t help that you’re carrying something very valuable and very fragile to Vil when he decided to pop out of nowhere upside down.

“What you got there, (y/n)?” He casually asked.

“Ah!”

A loud crash echoed in the hallway and your face pales up as Vil’s delivery is now on the floor, shattered. Just the sight of it is enough to send your thought spiraling as you can vividly picture Vil yelling at you for being careless and useless you can be. You are aware that your brain is exaggerating things but as your anxiety attack gets more prominent, the harder it is for you to breathe and rationalize which only made you panic. Your ears started ringing that you failed to hear Lilia calling out your name multiple times. You must have blacked out for when you regained your sense of focus and hearing, you can see a concerned Lilia hovering above you.

“Oh seven, my apologies little one.” He replaced the wet cloth on your forehead before continuing. “I should have known or at least notice you have anxiety attacks.”

When you’re feeling better, Lilia personally talked to Vil about the situation and offered to replace the said item.

Much to your surprise, Vil got mad at Lilia for causing your anxiety attack and even used his unique magic on the fae’s apron and favorite ladle.

Yep, the old man is currently banned from cooking. (Diasomnia sent Pomefiore their thanks that day.)

Nonetheless, Lilia is now careful about his random appearances and is now more attentive.

The downside is that he permanently has his dad mode on.

This man trusts you a lot.

He knows you won't force him to do things he doesn’t like and respected the fact that his main priority is to service Malleus. The same goes that you trust him that you love him and he won't force you to do things you don’t like.

So, when he saw you spend way more time with Deuce than him especially during his sword practice, he wasn’t pleased.

He’s rather blunt about it too that he just stops you in the hallway around other students.

“Why are you hanging out with Deuce too much?”

“He’s my friend, Silver. Of course, I’ll hang out with him when you’re busy.” You cocked your head sideways out of confusion.

He frowned, still not like the ache he feels in his chest. “Doesn’t mean you have to do it every time.”

“Hey, I don’t stop you from being with Mr. Draconia every time but I get restrictions? What happened to being fair to each other?”

“It's my duty to be around Lord Malleus, you on the other hand waste your time on someone else’s company.” He defended and straightened his posture unconsciously to assert authority. “If you have free time then watch me practice or something.”

“I did that before and I ended up falling asleep on the hard ground so you told me to do something else instead, remember?” You can't help but be hurt by the contradictions he spouting out right now especially since you two have garnered the attention of almost all the students nearby. “Can you take some time to cool down first before we talk about this again? I don’t want any misunderstandings to happen between us.”

“So you can go back to Deuce’s side already?” Anger slowly seeping into his visage but immediately disappeared with your hurt expression.

“Do you trust me so little…” You whispered not intending for him to hear. “You know what, fine. I’ll go to Deuce until you finally get your head straight.”

Let me tell you now, he feels everything just came crashing down. He never intended for it to cause a big rift between the two of you but at the looks of it, you two needed space.

The entire day this man will try to talk to you again but by some unknown force in the universe, there's always something preventing him to do so.

He’s so lost he can't even take a nap even in the comfort of the forest animals.

Deuce smacked him to his sense quite literally. Like, our delinquent boy just punched the living daylights out of this guy.

Deuce has to explain that you two are pretty much siblings when it comes to closeness and you’re always talking about him all the time.

Be prepared to be serenaded tonight, Silver ain't letting you leave him on a bad note.

Well, more like that’s what Lilia taught him to do since he was young.

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youwontlikethisblog · 3 years

Text

Picasso's Night

The previous post Adriana Arboleda brings you up to date with the analysis if you would like to go read it before you start reading this one :)

Now this day has been a pretty eventful one. For one: We witnessed Armando show contentment that morning when he saw Betty for the first time that day. Totally absorbed by her existence until Mario cleared his throat.

Armando screwed up big time when he made it seem and acted like spending some alone time with AA was a lot more important than Betty or the company. He yelled at her and said she got on his last nerve and since then Betty has been on a bad mood with Armando, who after Mario told him that Betty was jealous had a moment of realization and has been feeling pretty awful since then.

Interestingly enough as the night progressed and Betty was invited to the exhibition of Picasso's collection, Mario kept insisting that Armando go and speak with Betty since he was leaving to Miami the next day.

Though this time, unlike the last time he traveled, before Panama, Armando was a bit more hesitant to leave. It wasn't merely because of the new collection they were going to launch and it wasn't because of the state of company. Armando looked at Betty to see if he had any reason to stay, looking at his best friend for any excuse to stay.

After Marcela tells Betty to reserve two rooms at the same hotel they stayed last time and Mario agrees to them traveling he then starts to insist that Armando go speak to Betty and apologize for his behavior that day.

The one thing that Betty did begin to screw up on(aside from starting an affair with her hawt boss) is that now emotions begin to play a huge role, not in the personal part of her life but the professional.

Betty has always been good at maintaining a good separation of what is professional and what is personal(although most of the times when she didn't she was following Armando's lead or example) . At the start of their affair, the day after Armando kissed her for the first time, Betty stayed professional. Even afterwards, Betty stayed professional. When it has come to company time Betty has stayed professional except this time she didn't.

Her jealousy, her feelings took control of her, foretelling things to come, less than 24 hours away.

This also pushes Mario with this idea that Betty must be catered to by Armando in order to keep her under control, though Armando knows best and he knows Betty won't betray him, Mario keeps pushing this narrative and when Betty doesn't agree to it or deny she'll do it Mario understands this as her holding it over Armando's head because of what he did that day.

Writing this now has made me realize that that's the reason he wrote the letter to Armando, not as some stupid mistake or for Betty to find it, though that's a pretty good theory, is that he did it for Armando's sake. Here me out!

For one he truthfully believed that Armando would be stupid enough to screw up giving Betty her gifts and that it would ruin the relationship but the cruelty of this letter exceeded even his jokes behind closed doors, that Armando didn't find amusing anymore, even before he slept with Betty the first time. I'll explain this in the post regarding that fateful letter and from the point of view as a writer and why even that sequences of scenes was a bit choppy and had it's mistakes in execution.

Now here when Armando asks her if she will embellish the balance for him for the big board meeting she allows her anger and resentment to come above her labor obligations and she doesn't give him an answer, better yet she finds a way to ignore the subject. Yes you can argue that Betty was always motivated by her secret crush and her secret feelings for Armando to do all the things she did it in the past, like the first time she embellished the balance and while yes that is true. I have pointed out how Betty showed her love for Armando through her work. He had upset her as well in the past and she'd still do it because in the thick of it she couldn't see him fail when she had the "solution" in her hands but this time her feelings-though extremely valid since he did end up hurting her feelings not as his employee but as his girlfriend- come above everything because this time her ego, the one he was helping to build up, was crushed by the man himself and that is a mistake. Especially when it comes to something that doesn't only directly affect Armando but an entire enterprise where her friends happen to work in. This again foreshadows events to occur in less than 24 hours.

Later when he goes into her office to talk to her she tells him that she doesn't do that, but he interrupts her and tells her that he doesn't want to talk about that but that he wants to talk about Adriana and what happened in his office.

Again though Armando contradicts himself a lot when he is with Mario when we see him with Betty we know where the true nature of his worry or concern lies and it isn't the company but their relationship. The evidence in this is how he behaves when Mario brings up the company compared to his relationship with Betty.

After Betty leaves Mario explains why Betty was hurt and that he can't leave with Betty being hurt, angry, and resentful because she's got the company in her hands. Armando looks angry when Mario is explaining what his mistake translated to Betty. He's angry at himself, while Mario talks about the company Armando has his back to him, peaking outside of the blinds and then turns to him.

"What you're doing is throwing away all that work [we] put in the days before. You're practically telling her that the relationship is just a game. That for you the ninety sixties are a lot more important to you." Armando quickly looks at Mario when he says this, again he is maintaining himself composed and controlled with his emotions as his face doesn't give much of a reaction but the quick jerking of his eye sight allows us to know that this part, from all of what he has said, is a lot more important to him than the company, again because he trust Betty with it, and that he is more worried about the way he has offended Betty. "that this is made of paper and let me tell you something; an ugly wounded woman is more worse than a wounded tiger and that wound doesn't heal with pats on the back, no Sir."

This conversations motivates Armando, not to go talk with Betty since he already wanted to do that but to go searching for her so he could fix his mistake and clarify just how important she is to him.

At the exhibition Betty points out his needs with the models to which Armando tells her that she makes him feel like if he were some seggsually deprived man, which is true. This does make the assumption that Armando's conquests or what not where meant to be written as a borderline seggsual addiction behavior type of thing since she doesn't say "your infatuation, your affairs." she clearly says "your needs with the models".

The conversation here is important because it begins to open a can of warms. She tells him that he'd look good with her, that Adriana Arboleda and him would make a good pair. That their attractiveness complements each other.

"I understand asking for privacy for one thing only." We then see a frame of Armando(lol the painting behind him has to be comedic gold!) who glances away from her, lips with a slight frown but not tight or pursed, showing that he isn't mad or frustrated rather he is upset with himself. "You wanted to be alone with her. Besides I'm not asking for you to give me any explanations. At the end of it you are the president and I'm your assistant. Besides this all happened during work hours and since I've worked for you I perfectly know your needs with the models." She glances around and leaves as people get closer to them. Armando then goes after her.

Right now I'm going to admit that I was wrong, well somewhat. I wrote a post once saying that Betty was calling Armando Don instead of Sir as the relationship progressed but I was wrong. Betty uses the title of Sir as a term of respect for Armando. Even here when they've slept together and she's seen and felt the change of Armando towards her and their relationship she still calls him Sir or Don Armando, that doesn't change. However the somewhat mentioned does change when it comes to Armando. So I was wrong but towards who the theory fell upon. @el-moscorrofio-y-el-mercachifle was right and there isn't much of an importance when it comes to Betty and what she calls Armando. HOWEVER let me preference this that the person I was pointing this theory towards was my bad however the theory of changing names or titles is correct.

If you've read my untitled post regarding my OC and her relationship and how that helped me realize how I wasn't sympathizing with Marcela and that not only was A+M relationship toxic but as well as dependent than I gave you some glimpse into my original writing and how that process helped me be able to understand this part of their relationship and now that this is out of the way, let me tell you why these last two paragraphs are here.

My OC has a habit of never remembering peoples names on purpose, she does it as a power move. As if saying "You're not that important for me to remember your name." she does it especially to annoy people. Also because she's distracted half the time judging a person when they're first introducing themselves. Armando does something similar with Betty on her first days or weeks at Eco Moda.

Men tend to ignore women who they aren't attracted to. Armando did this to Betty. On a professional level he didn't ignore her but as a woman he did. We knows this because it was clearly presented this way at the start of the novela. However I really made my self take notice of this when I re-watched the first half of the novela(I haven't seen the ending bc I tend to avoid things that I cannot control or expect).

My OC is introduced to a guy who she can't stand and at first she calls him all sorts of names starting with the letter 'C' until she managed to remember his last name and calls him that for the remaining of the beginning of the story until they become friends, she switches between Caleb and Anderson, often times calling him by his name when they are having friendly conversation. When they become good friends and establish their friendship he no longer is just Anderson to her but Caleb, someone worth remembering. This is a small detail that I thought would allow the reader to determine the change of tonality between these two characters and their relationships and honestly one of my favorite details to write so when I first noticed this, I got too excited and projected it onto Betty when in reality it was Armando.

Now that I've spoiled my own writing(that I'll most likely never publish) let me explain why I bring this up, finally.

Armando called Betty at the start of the novela "Emperatriz". Once they became more familiar and Betty corrected him and told him he could call her Betty, he finally remembered her name. It's important to note this small detail because just like I intended to write it, so did Fernando Gaitan(I'm assuming lol). He did know her name but he didn't care to register it. Marcela called her Beatriz in front of him, Mario called her by her name, everyone did except for him, and she[Marcela] got upset at him when she heard him call her Betty because in her[Morch] eyes that was a cute nick name to have for an employee, especially for an "ugly" secretary. Now the switch between Betty and Beatriz did happen before the affair started, however the switch was a little bit more noticeable as Armando began to blur the lines of personal and impersonal.

In this scene though and the scenes before this, whenever emotions were heavily involved, especially when it was regarding their relationship Armando calls Betty, Beatriz, in fact even when she wasn't present in the room and he'd talk to Mario about his feelings and why he felt guilty(before he'd shut off this part of him bc Mario would start making jokes) Armando referred to Betty as Beatriz and not Betty but when it came to talking about her as an employee and not a woman he'd refer to her as Betty, it happens this day as well. When he gets upset that she won't let him spend alone time with AA and he yells at her and calls her Betty.

Why am I bringing up this small detail in this post? In this scene and the scene in Mario's apartment this is very evident and signifies the growth of his feelings and his conscious commitment to Betty as a woman.

Finally, after a bit of arguing inside the museum they leave together, of course, after sneaking out because Marcela went to the museum trying to catch him.

It's also important to note that when they found out Morch was in the museum that Betty asked Armando if he had anything to drink. It's pretty standard for him to be drinking, tipsy, or even drunk when he goes out with Betty. The one time I can remember him being completely sober was when he had to confess his feelings for her, soberly, the day after he kissed her for the first time. I broke that down in another post :)

Other times while he hasn't been drunk or tipsy he has had a few drinks at the office, however again it's pretty standard for him to drink and she knows this but why is it something that is brought up here?

Betty attributes Armando's behavior, especially when he is this...stubborn in doing things that could expose their relationship when he has been drinking. Not only that but also because the night they first hooked up they both had been heavily drinking, especially Armando and it is important as the continuation of the night leads us to Mario's apartment.

Outside, in his car, Armando finally gets to clarify his actions as he apologizes and tells her that he only wants her to know that she's more important to him than any other woman and he isn't shy to name the woman as he says: "than Adriana Arboleda, than Marcela or any other woman." This sounds a bit rehearsed but not like the previous times where we can even notice in his tone of voice and his micro expressions that he does so for manipulation. A great scene to use as a contrast to this attitude of his in this scene is the one where he makes out with Betty, the night he fights Roman and Co(wrote a post about it too). This lets us know that he really did think about how to apologize to her. While here his tone is rehearsed his micro expressions aren't a show, in reality his behavior is natural and goes along with what he is saying.

Now Betty in a teasing tone replies to him saying "That's not true." (also because she doesn't believe him)and Armando in a very serious tone and even a seductive tone, gazing his eyes down her body and back to her lips tells her that of course it's true and leans in, placing his hand on her face and they start to kiss.

This shows us that Armando once again isn't only feeling his emotional attraction to Betty, which is what moved his physical attraction forward in the past but now he can tell the difference between these two and he is okay with them! This is a huge step for Armando because he no longer is denying these things from himself. In fact he encourages himself and Betty to have these desires for one another and that as the days progress since their first sinful night his desire for Betty only continues to increase.

When they pull away his phone starts to ring, Betty asks if it's Marcela and Armando's facial expression and tone tells us it is as he looks annoyed and pissed that she's calling him.

This reaction is also standard for him because it's the exact same expression he pulls every time Marcela calls him. Especially when he's with Betty. However this small detail we've been given through the past episodes and this night also hold much significance in future episodes when his reaction to her call no longer is standard behavior from him.

While at the start of this phone call his tone is very forced in "lovingly" speaking to Marcela, his micro expressions again show us that he is just pretending. This tone is one we've heard a bunch of times before and it's one that is solely reserved for Marcela. Even on her part she tries to speak "politely" and just as if she were simply calling because she was curious but as this conversation goes both their dances of trying to keep things peaceful and civil subside and they basically start a mosh pit where they become more hostile until Armando implodes on her.

Marcela in a her standard of questionnaire routine asks Armando who he's with, hesitant he admits he's with Betty.

Her reaction to this however isn't standard of just guilt, taking into consideration the events of the day and that even Armando has told her that Marcela stops nagging him when she knows he's with her and because she's also eavesdropped and heard Armando say that Marcela doesn't consider her as a femininely threat, much less a woman, she once again gets hurt.

One could assume Armando did this to cover his tracks in case anyone told Marcela that they saw them leave together. It's also not hard to believe that Armando is stupid and says things without thinking them through in the heat of the moment however what is more obvious is that he probably wanted to take Marcela off his back so he tells her that he's with Betty. The small pause he takes before he says this helps me determine this. It could also be that he did so in case anyone did tell Marcela he left with Betty.

As Armando implodes on Marcela for insinuating that he lied to her i.e that he's going to go off with his mistress, Betty shifts in her seat and then she looks uncomfortable, returning to her guilt.

In this scene Betty experiences first hand this toxic side of Armando, one she has seen as a boss to employee scenario but not as a significant other. She has heard and even been in the middle of their fights in the past and while even then she behaved professionally, and also guilty this time she shows a lot more emotions raging from being uncomfortable to even being upset with Armando. This however is a small taste to what she will experience first hand not as the bystander of this side of his but as the target of his toxic behavior.

Later in the car, as he drives, Betty, with a broken heart tells Armando she believes that he should go on his trip and try to reconcile his relationship with Marcela and reconnect while they're away.

Armando, nervous and scared asks her if that's what she really wants and the hurt that it might be, he asks(really demands) for her to look him in the eyes and tell him this. Which Betty doesn't. In this moment his phone rings.

Why do these small details play such a huge role?

Less than 24 hours away, Betty finds the letter which plays the exact rhythm in which Armando and Mario planned her downfall.

For one: While in the past Betty agreed to embellish the balance for the meeting, this night she did not and because of this Armando went out to look for her at the exhibit and then took her to his best friends bach pad and slept with her all so she would embellish that balance which would keep the board members at peace allowing Armando to continue as the president of Eco Moda.

Two: That Mario called him this night, while they were together, and while Armando "played" it off that Mario wasn't aware of their affair, when she later questioned him about it and he denied it, these conversations begin to makes sense to her.

We know that's not the case. While Mario spoke about the company Armando didn't seem that concerned or even motivated to go searching for her but it wasn't until Mario mentioned how sever it was what that he implied to Betty that AA was more important to him than her[Betty] and what that meant for their relationship and how she was suffering because of it that he was motivated to search for her as he said, a terrible fear was settling in him because of it. While yes, Mario suggested that they hook up so she could be happy again and forgive him and that way the company would still be in their hands and not Nicolas, Armando didn't need any motivation for that.

In fact he hasn't needed any inspiration or motivation sober or drunk to desire Betty, often not being able to stop himself from kissing her and more. Was this based on Mario telling him to do this?

No.

It wasn't because Mario suggested it(At the office). Unlike their first night where Armando kept calling Mario and kept asking for help and advice, this time Armando gets annoyed at Mario for calling him. Even his behavior is different. While before when Mario kept insisting that he slept with Betty to get it over with, Armando showed disgust or being repugnant to doing an atrocity of that magnitude towards Betty, this time his face was poker. He showed no real disgust towards the idea of seducing Betty as in he'd sleep with her, more that Mario yet again was using something he knew was important and special to the both of them[B+A] as a weapon for the "good" of the company.

When he hangs up his phone Betty points out that the direction he's driving isn't towards her house, to which Armando tells her if she really wants to go home.

"I think it's for the best." He turns to stare at her and then pulls to the side of the road.

"That you want me to take you home?" He asks in disbelief. Betty swallows hard, the corner of her mouth look a bit downward and she looks scared. "Damnit!" He hits his steering wheel and though he is angry, his tone is completely different to that of his tone when he is angry at Marcela. "Damnit, Beatriz, all I want is to be with you tonight, I leave tomorrow, remember? I went to the museum, exclusively, to pick you up, to see you, to feel you next to me, to be with you. When we bumped into Marcela I risked my life and I am still risking it to this moment. Everything I've done is to tell you that I adore you, that you're above Adriana Arboleda, that you're above Marcela, of-of all of them!" We can determine he is honest here as he stares at her, exclusively even when she doesn't stare back at him, she looks pained and confused herself. "and the only thing you can tell me is that you want me to go to Palm Beach(I LOVE the way he says Palm Beach it's just ugh so nice) and have a marvelous honeymoon with her so that we can grow closer." He looks down, away from her and then ahead of him. His voice was no longer harsh at the end more so becoming almost a whisper. "That's what you want? Okay! Right now I'll drive you to your house because it's what you're asking from me. I don't deserve this." (BAWHAHAHA ARMANI YES YOU DO, MY BOY).

Now in a non-contextual way one could simply asume that he is doing this all under the bias of manipulation towards Betty, especially that final line of "I don't deserve this." but when you take all the context clues and you look at the bigger picture there's more that plays in here and I'm not saying that Armando isn't manipulating Betty in this exact scene, he is very much doing so, however it isn't like in the past. This time he does so to get what he wants, which is to spend the night with Betty so he guilts her with this final part of "I don't deserve this- because I've risked so much to spend this night with you."

However taking aside that guilt trip manipulation, why does Armando stumble once in his words showing he isn't rehashing this previous speech? and why does he take a breather before he tells Betty that he'll drop her off at her house like she asked?

While the first apology was what he rehearsed with himself, this second time around it took him by surprise to admit that she was above all the other women because this apology wasn't based on a "lets just make up right now." it was an apology based in heart and the self-realization of how true that statement was for him that while yes Betty was above Adriana Arboleda in her significance to him and even Marcela who he's engaged to, she is now also above all women.

How true is this statement?

Well we see a change of behavior of his with women in the future episodes which proves, yet again, that this confession of his wasn't just an apology so Betty could forgive him, but an apology that was sincere and heart felt.

Betty finally gives in and tells him to wait. With tears coating her lashes she stares at him "Sir, forgive me." She speaks solemnly. Armando's entire body relaxes just a bit as he sits back on his seat. "Sir, forgive me. I want you to understand that-that this hasn't been easy for me. [The situation] with Adriana Arboleda and now the conflict with Ms. Marcela; it's killing me, Sir." His anger and hurt begins to simmer down. "I don't know what to do, how to behave. I-I think I'm acting very bad." She looks away from him, touches the side of her face in a worried and embarrassed manor while Armando stares at her and timidly(in his nature) asks her what truly worry's him.

"But do you want to be with me?"

"Yes, of course, of course. It's what I want most." She caresses the side of his face, he leans towards her hand "in the world." and now he looks like he's come back to life. Staring at her with a soft glow and when she pulls her hand down he looks at it and follows it until he stares back at her, feeling the absences of her touch and missing it. "But you leave tomorrow." They both look away from each other but Armando only does so for a micro second before he stares back at her. "and I won't be complete without you, Sir." Again we get a frame of Armando's reaction to this. "Not being by your side will not be any easier for me." As she speaks her tone is soft, timid however not wavering showing that while she is nervous to confess this to him, she isn't scared of doing so.

"Betty." He says so adoringly towards her. "Betty" he whispers and touches her face and honestly I believe his favorite part of Betty's face is the side of her face, by her earlobe cause he's always touching her there. "Nobody said this would be easy. We knew this road was going to be a difficult one but you know what? I am going to be missing you so much. I'm going to miss you a lot."

Again the words here are lost in translation he tells her "Usted me va a hacer muchísima falta." which roughly is saying that there will be a huge lack of her in him, causing him to yarn for her a lot and feeling that absences of hers will make him miss her in a very profound way because he needs her. This separation they're both fearful of is what brings the forgiveness to shore.

Now the post for that specific scene will need an entire post dedicated to it because there's so much! Just so much.

For this episode I had to watch it on the NBC app so maybe there was some scenes missing.

I don't know if anyone noticed how important the story of Picasso and his lovers was for this and how they showed the similarities to Armando and his lovers, specifically how toxic Picasso was(all though if we're being honest that dood sounds more abusive than just toxic bc we all got a lil toxicity in our system but that foo was straight up kidnapping his lovers and locking them up while he had other's on the side? Nah man call a hotline.) towards his lovers. Though I am not saying that Armando is a saint, I don't think he is as bad as Picasso, that dood needed a restraining order against him so he could just stay away from all women.

In all seriousness though the similarity was that though Picasso had lovers he cared for each of them especially his last two lovers, i.e Betty and Marcela and it foreshadowed just how jealous and pathetic Armando would become in the future.

I mean I love Armando, I had to learn to love him bc at first I didn't, but the behavior he displays in the future episodes while yeah one could explain them are not justifiable and I will get into detail on that in the future posts and the post I am still writing regarding his abusive/toxic tendencies.

Overall this episode, which on NBC is episode 68, was pretty straightforward with a lot of small details to look at and not really for the leading on of the scenes in Mario's apartment but overall where the story continues to get pushed.

In this episode, the episode when Armando fights Roman and Co. and her birthday night celebration and the previous night of this episode are nights that Betty goes back to prove that what she reads in that letter are true, especially this night, before they got to the apartment and just how much Armando "risked" to spend that night with her.

While she tries to believe that it's all a joke because she's certain that Armando was honest and heartfelt with her through his actions and not words, she doesn't trust him. I'll explain that a lot more further in that post.

Pushing forward the plot of the story though we see just how these two have truthfully grown close together and not just as friends but as lovers who are exploring their feelings a lot more now and while Betty is learning to open herself up again, Armando is learning to love for the first time.

I say that Betty is learning to open herself up again because it's true. While in the past she asked Armando why he was interested in her, she shared poetic talk about how the moon inspired poets and how guilty she felt when she saw Marcela, she hadn't opened herself up, not until the night at the hotel and that wasn't much, she barely opened up when Armando was asking her about her first time. This night she was a lot more open. She called out Armando's behavior point blank and period, no hesitation, she spoke about her opinion and then she spoke about how she felt, not regarding her insecurity but regarding their relationship and the absences she'd feel from Armando not being there. While before she'd just say "I need you." or "You mean a lot to me." this time she goes on to further explain her feelings to Armando instead of just saying the words, this time she elaborates.

Armando is learning to love for the first time, being humble in realizing his mistakes, his limits and also understanding just how his actions affect others but the most important thing is that he is learning to be at peace with his feelings for Betty. We saw it that morning when he first saw Betty, later in the office when Betty caught him making out with the AA picture and just how guilty and embarrassed he felt because Betty saw him. Unlike with Marcela where he was scared that she'd cause a while scene, this time the problem for him was that Betty wouldn't cause a scene but be hurt and dump him for it, which would be a big deal for him. We saw it later when Betty forgave him after the letter and gift and when he realized the huge mistake he made with AA in the way he treated Betty. All of these behaviors has shown an Armando who has accepted that he cares for Betty, not love, but cares for her deeply and that she is important to him.

Thank you for being patient with me and sorry that I haven't been as active. These past days have been pretty busy and they'll continue being so. I'll probably only be able to post once a week but I hope that the post become better quality that way as well since I'll have more time to really break down the episodes.

Well 'til next time! :)

#betty la fea #betty pinzón solano #beatriz pinzón solano #beatriz pinzon solano #betty ysblf #armando ysblf #don armando #armando mendoza #analysis of ysblf #ysblf #mario calderon

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moon-light-jukebox · 4 years

Text

Learning Styles - [Reid x Reader]

Summary: Reader has worked hard to get to the FBI, but a misunderstanding has her feeling insecure.

Pairing: Spencer Reid / Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2.5k

Genre: Fluff

Rating: PG

Content Warning: Mention of normal criminal minds stuff briefly.

A/n: I got these two requests and they were so similar I decided to combine them. I hope that’s okay, but I feel like the stories would have been almost identical.

Requests: - I have a fic suggestion. Reader pretends to be dumb but is actually really smart. I’m thinking of that quote about marilyn ”you have to be really smart to pretend to be dumb”. One day spencer realizes that reader is smarter than she lets people know.

- Hi! Can I request a spencer reid x reader fic where reader isn't great with numbers but brilliant with behaviour and humanities (i.e. literature, history, sociology, up to you)? Maybe a dash of insecurity to spice things up?

-- Learning Styles --

My favorite professor in college told me that everyone learns differently; what works for one person won’t work in the same way for another. We are all different human beings that are shaped in different ways.

I had always been oddly insecure about my intelligence level. One of my earliest memories was my mother yelling at me while I sat at the kitchen table when I was in first grade. I was the only kid in my class who still hadn’t learned how to read. I just didn’t understand. All of my friends were progressing so much quicker than me and my mother was losing patience.

It wasn’t until my grandmother stepped in that everything changed. My elementary school teacher was training children to read by memorizing sight words, a concept I didn’t understand. When my grandmother sat down and taught me phonics. I distinctly remember everything snapping into place.

I was in 1st grade and reading at a 7th-grade level by Christmas. Once I finally understood my learning style, I really began to thrive.

But no matter what I did, I could still hear my mother yelling at me, telling me I was stupid.

In my line of work, I see just how much the throw away comments that parents make can shape a child’s development. Luckily, those comments just made me a bit insecure, not a murderer.

Up until I was 22, I wasn’t really sure what I wanted to do beyond this desire I had to help people. SSA David Rossi had come to guest lecture in one of my abnormal psych classes during undergrad. After I heard him speak, I was done. I couldn’t have done anything else with my life. I had obtained my master’s in psychology before I joined the FBI.

It took some time, but I was finally assigned to the Behavioral Analysis Unit at Quantico. I was so excited on my first day that I remember my hands physically shaking.

Until they weren’t.

I can still remember my first day so clearly. SSA Hotchner had introduced me to the team, saving the “best” for last.

“And this is Dr. Spencer Reid,” he had said. “He’s our expert on…well, everything.”

Reid was my age and he had his Ph.D. I remember feeling awed by him.

Until I didn’t.

"I hold 3 Ph.D.'s in Chemistry, Engineering, and Mathematics. I also have BAs in psychology and sociology."

I remember my jaw almost hitting the floor. While I was impressed by him, I wasn’t insecure about my place on the team.

Until I was.

My grandmother may have helped me master reading, which opened the door to me mastering anything else I put my mind to…except math.

I was fine at statistics, luckily. You couldn’t get a psych degree without a ton of statistics work. But statistics was different, I could see the practical use of statistics. I just couldn’t wrap my head around calculus or algebra.

On my first case with the team, Reid had calculated some insane mathematical equations on the whiteboard, running down the probabilities and applying a mathematical formula to the unsub’s behavior.

It wasn't until later, after the case was solved when I was standing in front of the whiteboard that my confidence was hit. Reid had come into the room and saw me looking at his work.

“Don’t bother trying to understand it,” he had said. “You’d have to be a genius to understand what I do.”

I didn’t have a word to describe the feeling that settled in my stomach at his words, I wasn’t sure such a word existed. The feeling was cold and heavy, but also made my body burn with shame.

I had just offered him a tight smile before I left the room.

On the plane home I had made a decision. I was no match for Dr. Reid, I doubt anyone was. So, I would take myself out of the competition. I couldn’t get hurt if I wasn’t playing the game.

And that is how the next year of my life went. I allowed Dr. Reid to explain things to me that I was an expert in, never saying a word. I acted like I didn't understand concepts that I had written papers on. The only thing I didn't dumb down was my profiling skills. Those were necessary for my job and for saving lives.

I don’t think anyone realized what I was doing.

Until they did.

The team had been called to Colorado to assist in capturing a serial rapist.

All of our cases bothered me, every last one…but something about ones with this vile element really struck me.

We had the unsub’s name, Tyler Childress. He had spent time in prison for sexual assault and burglary. It seems while he was in prison, he spent time perfecting his methods; it was only by pure luck that we found his fingerprint inside the victim’s house, making him the main suspect.

When we paid Mr. Childress a visit, he had managed to get the drop on Prentiss and Morgan, allowing them to escape. Morgan was furious.

All of us were sitting around a conference table in the local prescient while we let Dr. Reid talk.

I was trying to be calm, I was, but my nails were digging into my palm so deeply I was worried I was about to draw blood.

“Guys,” the expert on everything said. “He has to have some sort of accomplice.”

Rossi just sighed. “But the profile doesn’t point to him being the sort to do well with others; he’s a narcissist.”

Reid wouldn’t budge. “I know that, but he isn’t intelligent enough to pull this off alone. He’s just not. He had an IQ test done when he was 20. He scored in the mentally handicapped range. I’m telling you he has to have help.”

“Are you sure, Reid?” Hotch asked.

“Positive. I have his results right here.”

“IQ tests aren’t a good measure of intelligence on their own.”

I was so startled that someone had contradicted Dr. Reid that it took me a second to realize it was me who had contradicted him.

He turned to face me; his brown eyes wide. “What?”

Well, in for a penny, in for a pound. “IQ tests aren’t a good measure of intelligence.”

Dr. Reid laughed. He laughed at me like my comment was funny. “I don’t know where you heard that,” he began.

But I interrupted him. "IQ tests are classist and oftentimes racist. The man who invented the IQ test never intended for it to be used as a complete measure of intelligence. He regretted making the test.”

Reid sputtered. “You…it’s not racist!”

“Yes. It. Is.” I ground out. “If it wasn’t it wouldn’t be illegal to administer an IQ test to a black child in the state of California.”

"Wait, it's illegal to do that?" JJ asked, her brows drawn together.

"Yes. There was a court case in the 1970s over it. Teachers were using tests to separate white children from black children. The black children were put into special education classes they didn’t need to be in. Just because the teachers didn’t want those children in their classrooms.”

I should have stopped, but I was on a role. “They’re also inherently classist. How can you expect a child to answer a question about Romeo and Juliet if they haven’t heard of it?”

That had Dr. Reid scoffing. “Everyone has heard of it.”

I shot to my feet, unable to hold back anymore. “No, they haven’t. Children in underfunded schools that don’t have access to resources might not have heard about the most famous play in history because their school wasn’t able to provide the materials to teach them about it. There was a study done in a remote part of Russia right after the IQ test was invented. Every. Single. Person. Scored in the mentally handicapped range. Because they didn’t understand.”

I knew my voice was rising but I couldn’t stop myself. “Once the researcher took the questions and applied them to things they understood, they all scored as above average. They didn’t understand math as an abstract concept, but they understood it when it was applied to their businesses, to something they actually knew about.”

I cleared my throat. “The test isn’t fair, it’s not equal. Tyler Childress didn’t go to a good school and he didn’t have a stable home life. You can’t use one measure to calculate his intelligence. He’s gotten away with 7 assaults so far that we know of. He’s not stupid.”

The entire room was silent once I had stopped speaking. I couldn’t bring myself to regret it though. What kind of person was I if I played dumb because I was afraid of being mocked when a monster was out there attacking women? No, those women deserved to have me at my best.

And I’ll be damned if I wouldn’t give it to them.

Rossi spoke first, his eyes twinkling when he looked at me. “Took you long enough,” he said. “But y/n is right. We trust the profile; we don’t let personal bias cloud the way. That’s how we catch this bastard.”

Later that day, we were cleaning up the conference room while the local police processed Tyler Childress.

Pathological narcissism is a complex disorder, but we followed the profile and Rossi was right. Hotch set up a press conference in which JJ and Prentiss took center stage. They tore Childress’s ego to shreds on live television.

His narcissism wouldn’t allow that to slide. He got angry, he made a mistake, and we got him before anyone else got hurt.

While the cat was out of the bag about my intelligence and that made me nervous, I couldn't regret any of it. I got to be the one to tell our last victim that we got him. I got to hug her while she cried because now that he was locked up, she felt like her healing could begin. I wasn’t sure if my rant about structural racism and the classism of IQ tests actually helped anything, but that didn’t really matter. There was one less monster in the shadows.

Today was a good day.

I was alone in the conference room, untacking photos from the evidence board when I heard someone clear their throat from behind me. I turned my head to meet the wide, honey brown eyes of Dr. Spencer Reid.

Oh boy, I thought. “What’s up, Reid?”

He shifted from foot to foot, his hands twisting in front of him before he crossed his arms over his chest. “I asked Garcia to look into you.”

My eyebrows drew together. “I’m pretty sure any nefarious things I had done would have popped up on my initial background check.”

“Right, I didn’t mean like that,” he mumbled, the apples of his cheeks turning pink. “I asked her to look into you academically.”

Shit.

He went on. “You double majored in psychology and sociology before you got a master’s in cultural psychology. She pulled your thesis. I just read it.”

“I see.” I turned my attention back to the board.

“You also guest lecture on cross-cultural psychology at Georgetown several times a year. And you’ve co-authored two papers since I’ve known you.”

Meh, it’s three. But that doesn’t matter. “Did you read those too?”

I took his silence as confirmation.

He was so quiet I almost thought he had left, but the crackle of energy I felt in the air told me he hadn’t. “Do you need something, Dr. Reid?”

"Why didn't you get your Ph.D.?"

I had answered that question many, many times. “I didn’t need a doctorate to do what I wanted to do. I didn’t want to waste time. Once I figured out what I wanted, I charged at it.” Which was a far more honest answer than most people got about that from me.

“W-why did you pretend to be dumb?” he rasped out, causing me to look back at him. “32 days ago, you let me explain the long-term effects of gerrymandering and the complex causes of poverty.”

“Of course, I did,” I said, frowning. “Why wouldn’t I?”

“One of the papers you authored was about generational poverty.”

“Just because I know a lot about something doesn’t mean I can stop listening to information. That sort of thinking breeds ignorance.” I smiled, unable to not tease him just a little bit.

Reid took a step closer to me. “You didn’t answer my question.”

I just shrugged my shoulders. “I don’t have a good answer.”

In all the months I had known him, Spencer Reid had never touched me, not even so much as a finger brushing against mine when he handed me something. That fact is why I was so startled when I felt his hand on my upper arm, turning me towards him.

He licked his lips, his eyes darting around. “Did everyone else know?”

I shook my head, my teasing mood long gone. "No. I mean, clearly, Rossi suspected but…No, I didn't tell anyone else."

“I just don’t understand. You’re brilliant.”

I scoffed. “No, I’m not. I’m decent a psychology, sociology, stuff like that. I can’t apply math to behavior to find patterns. I can’t even calculate how much something is gonna cost when it’s on sale without a calculator half the time.”

‘What do you…” Reid trailed off. “Wait. The very first case. You were looking at the evidence board.”

Goddamn eidetic memory.

The boy wonder was on a roll now. “I told you that you’d have to…is that why you didn’t tell me?”

What else could I do? I just nodded.

Those brown eyes closed, and he let out a groan. “I said that because I thought you were going to…I was worried…” He huffed out a breath and opened his eyes. “I wanted you to like me. I didn’t want you to think I was just a nerd.”

Now I was confused. “Why?”

Spencer Reid’s blush went all the way down his neck. “Well…I just…Morgan said I should just talk to you. But I’m not…I’m not good at that. I panic, then I start to ramble. Like I’m doing now…”

“Reid,” I interrupted. “I’m not playing dumb now. I really have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“I like you,” he blurted out right before he smacked both of his hands over his face. “Oh my god. I sound like a child.” I thought I heard him mutter idiot under his breath. “Emily says that my IQ gets slashed to 60 whenever I see a pretty girl.”

Much like that moment all those years ago when I was a child, I felt everything click into place. Oh.

I couldn't suppress my smile any longer. I rose up on my tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his cheek. "Well, we've already gone over how IQ tests aren't a good measure of overall intelligence."

With that, I quickly stepped away and hurried out of the conference room, leaving a stunned genius in my wake. When I turned back to look at him, I saw his fingers brushing over the place where my lips had just been.

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