#exo angst
Text
Illicit Affairs
Characters: Idol!Baekhyun x trainee/idol!Reader
Genre: smut, angst
Warnings: explicit unprotected sex, virgin sex, significant age gap, problematic relationship dynamics, this is purely a work of fiction and in no way representative of a healthy relationship
WC: 9.7k (trust me it needed to be that long)
A/N: Heavily inspired by the song, although the forbidden nature of the relationship is interpreted more as dealing with the age difference and dynamic, rather than being a result of infidelity. I definitely recommend giving it a listen before reading further.
Masterlist
He was one of the last people you met after becoming a trainee, but he was the one you'd been thinking about meeting the most.
Baekhyun was the reason you decided to become a singer. He was the person that made you fall in love with music and singing ten years ago, so when you finally bumped into him in person, it left you breathless and flustered.
He was even more gorgeous than you could've expected, and you'd already met many other idols by then. You'd been waiting for your vocal lesson one evening, and he was the person who went right before you. When his lesson ended, he walked out of the soundproof room, and he was standing right in front of you.
The image of him you'd always had in your mind, based on the countless pictures and videos you'd seen of him throughout the years, couldn't compare at all. With him directly before you, in person, he looked so much better than you ever could've imagined. He was just wearing a black tshirt and sweats, no makeup, hair unstyled and even a bit messy, but you still had to fight off the urge to stare. He was quite a bit taller than you, and you could see the muscle definition in his chest and arms under the plain black shirt. Everything about him was just so perfectly shaped, to you. From his familiar but still somehow surprisingly handsome face, to his broad shoulders, down to his waist and hips. If you found him attractive before meeting him in person, you were down badly now.
It was so natural and sweet how he greeted you, asking if you were new, and wishing you the best for your trainee journey. Of course you thanked him, but he could easily see how much the sudden meeting had shaken you up, so he kept it brief.
From then on, you saw him there every week before your lesson, and found yourself looking forward to it every time. The greetings became short conversations, and eventually you even told him how he'd been the one to inspire you back in the day to also be a singer and eventually audition. You would never forget how those words made his face light up.
“Really? Back then I had no idea what I was doing, I'm still surprised by how much people seemed to like me. It means a lot to hear that.”
He had one of those special kinds of smiles that you only see a few times in your life. It made you feel seen, appreciated, like to him, you were the only other person that mattered. He had that kind of energy about him.
All you could think to do was blush and smile back. Being around him was almost like some sort of high to you, the way your heart pounded and you got butterflies in your stomach.
Finally your voice teacher popped his head out the door, clearing his throat. “Sorry, I've got a bit of a cold. We'll keep it short today.”
Without missing a beat, Baekhyun spoke up. “If you need to take the night off I can take over her lesson.” He turned towards you, “Would you be okay with that?”
Your eyes grew wide and your mouth opened slightly, but no words came out, so you just nodded.
“You sure?” The teacher said, “That would be great, thank you.”
“Of course, it's already pretty late, you should get some rest.”
So, you were left with Baekhyun teaching your lesson for the evening. You were still dumbfounded as he led you back into the small soundproof room, and asked what you had learned in last week's lesson.
You answered him, though it was barely above a whisper. Having him teaching you all of the sudden was not something you were mentally prepared for.
However he still understood, and started leading you through some warm ups.
To say that you were blushing, embarrassed, mortified, or anything similar still felt like an understatement. Warm ups just aren't cute.They felt silly and sounded dumb and the idea of doing them in front of Baekhyun of all people made you want to curl up into a tiny ball and become one with the carpet on the floor.
Of course Baekhyun quickly caught on to that. “How about we do them together? I'll start, and you just match me, ok?”
His voice concealed your own enough to ease your mind a bit, but soon he was asking you to sing on your own, without his voice to hide behind.
You could barely get out a sound, let alone properly sing a simple scale. It was frustrating beyond belief, you knew you were a good singer, and you were incredibly lucky to have him offer to teach you, but your shyness still got the best of you. Trying to do anything while his eyes were on you felt impossible.
Baekhyun was starting to regret offering to do the lesson, not because he didn't want to, but because he felt he was making you uncomfortable. He loved the idea of mentoring a trainee, helping them develop their skills and getting to see them debut with his encouragement, it had even been a dream of his. Of course this was only one vocal lesson, but it was something he'd been thinking about for a while, and this seemed like a great opportunity, at least at first. But he knew he couldn't force it, and he didn't want to hold you back either.
“I'm sorry, I didn't really think this through. Should we call it a night?” He asked, and you felt your heart sink. The disappointment evident on your face must've told him that you weren't quite ready to give up yet, so he made you an offer.
“What if I face the wall, and you close your eyes, just imagine I'm not here and you're practicing by yourself. Just so I can hear you and get a better idea for what we should work on.”
You took a deep breath. He was just another person, and he was here because he wanted to help you.
When you nodded, he smiled, ready to give it your best shot before he turned away, facing the corner of the room.
It actually came out sounding okay that time, so you repeated it again for good measure.
When you opened your eyes Baekhyun was looking your way again, with a proud smile on his face.
He had you repeat it a few more times, reassuring you every time that you were doing well, and for you, just seeing him smiling and praising you was enough to keep you going.
With you finally past your mental block, he was able to get an idea of where you were at, and both of you were surprised to see how quickly two hours went by. He still kept things simple, not wanting to overwhelm you or make you shy again, but it was going amazingly well and he found himself almost as excited about it as you, if not even more.
With the lesson finally over, he offered to drive you back to your dorm on his way home, and you happily accepted. When he led you to his car, a silver Porsche, you let out a small laugh in disbelief. Baekhyun just smiled, making a little extra show out of opening the door for you, before circling around to get in himself. You stayed quiet, just listening to him softly sing along to the music he'd put on until it was time for him to drop you off. Part of you was still in disbelief, that you'd really spent the last few hours with him, and now, you were next to him in his car as he drove you home. When he pulled up to your dorm, he wished you a good night, and didn't move until he saw you enter the building safely. As you laid in bed that night you replayed it all in your mind, smiling like a fool at how heart fluttering it all was. For the first time, you couldn’t fall asleep because your reality was somehow even better than what you could dream up.
One week later, when you arrived for your lesson again, you were surprised when Baekhyun and your original teacher said they wanted to discuss something with you.
“How would you feel about having your vocal lessons with me from now on?” Baekhyun asked.
They saw the surprise on your face, your first teacher nodding at what Baekhyun had said.
“Wow, I mean, are you sure? It's an honor, of course, but, why..?”
���Teaching is something I've been thinking a lot about lately and I really enjoyed our lesson last week. It's up to you, of course, but if you'd be interested then I'd love to be your new voice teacher.”
You laughed, mostly in disbelief. It felt too good to be true. Baekhyun was someone you'd looked up to for so long, and now he was happily offering to personally help you with your singing.
“You really mean that?”
He was still smiling in that almost frustratingly captivating way, nodding at your question. “So should we get started?”
Unlike the week prior you had a bit more confidence this time around, and both you and him thoroughly enjoyed the lesson. Every week that followed your voice grew even bolder, as you got more used to being around him. You got less nervous to see him, moreso happy and excited to get to sing with him, and having him as your teacher made you all the more dedicated to doing your absolute best.
Soon you started to ask him about other things, too. First it was dancing, asking his advice for how to memorize choreographies more easily. Then, how to talk to the media, or how to pose for photo shoots. Within a few months Baekhyun was much more than just the voice teacher you saw once a week. He helped you with basically every aspect of becoming a successful idol, he became a mentor to you.
You could never fully get used to it, to having him in your life in such a close way. Your heart would still flutter when he showed you that amazing smile of his, and you still refused to slack off on your vocals or dancing, because you wanted to impress him, but mostly because you’d get to see that very smile. He was every bit as lovely and charming as you’d always imagined he would be, and you fell hard for him, he made it impossible for you not to. With how sweet he was to you, it sometimes seemed like he might actually like you, as more than a student, but those were thoughts you pushed away, knowing realistically that a relationship with him was nothing more than a fantasy.
It was only six months into being a trainee that you were told you would debut, and you knew that you had him to thank for it. Another few months later the day came, and it was time for you to perform with your group for the first time.
As soon as you stepped off stage, out of the view of the cameras, you lost it. The tears weren't because you felt sad or disappointed, simply overwhelmed. You knew you'd done well, really well in fact. Your career had officially begun, and the weight of it came down on you all at once, leaving you with little to do but sit in your dressing room in disbelief.
There was a soft knock on the door, and next thing you knew Baekhyun’s head was peeking in, and you weren't sure you'd ever seen him smile that big before.
Without as much as a second of hesitation, you ran to the door, pulling him inside. As the door shut behind him, his arms wrapped around you.
His praises almost went unheard, still too overwhelmed by everything to fully listen to what he was saying, but you could tell he was happy, that he thought you'd done really well.
It wasn't long until his arms broke away, hands still on your shoulders as he looked at you, smiling that amazing smile of his. With him looking at you like that, telling you how well you'd done, how proud he was, how happy he was to be your mentor, your emotions ran wild. It was everything, the adrenaline, relief, euphoria, and just him.
His eyes were still on your teary ones, admiring you, a little overwhelmed himself. Seeing you finally debut after the months he'd spent with you, singing together, dancing, doing everything he could to make sure you were ready when the day came, got him a little teary eyed, too. You'd done so well, and he felt so lucky to have gotten to be there by your side for all of it.
“I'm so proud of you.” He said, his hands moving down from your shoulders, along your arms. His eyes held so much warmth behind them, the sweet words along with his hands on you, and the way he never took his eyes away from you, had you reeling, stomach doing flips. For a second you swore his face was getting closer to yours, and his eyes flickered down to your lips. The tension seemed so thick, it became unbearable.
You threw your arms around him, and you kissed him.
At first he took a step back, stumbling a bit, too surprised to fully react. But before you had the chance to pull away, his hand was holding your face against his own, returning the same kind of passion you showed him.
Baekhyun, your endlessly kind, lovely, talented, handsome, funny, charming mentor, was kissing you back. With his free arm, he circled your waist and pulled you closer, flush with his chest. The hand on your face held you close so softly, asking, not demanding, for more contact, for this to not end so quickly. He gave you every chance to pull away, to stop him, but you didn't, you only melted into his affection even more.
The knock on the door pulled you both rudely back to reality. Your lips parted, and as you stared at one another, what you'd just done started to sink in. Baekhyuns’ face fell in a way you’d never seen before, and then he was gone. He walked through the door with all the horror disgust he felt towards himself clearly evident and the knot in his stomach nearly made him sick.
He knew he made a huge mistake. He fucked up so incredibly badly.
You stood there stunned, a million things running through your head, and collapsed under the weight of it all.
The stylist was confused to say the least after first witnessing Baekhyun’s swift exit and next finding you, sitting on the floor crying. Thankfully she excused herself and let you be.
Baekhyun kissed you, and then just walked out, leaving you alone and confused. The guilt nearly ate him alive. Returning your kiss crossed so many lines and he should've known better, and he did, but you caught him so off guard, in such an emotionally charged moment, it just happened. The sudden euphoria of realizing that you were kissing him overpowered any rational thought. He knew he must be insane.
And of all days, it was the day of your debut.
He had to make this right.
He returned to your waiting room but it was already empty. He kept walking around the building trying to find you, even running into your bandmates, but you were nowhere to be found.
Then he tried calling you, but he was sent to voicemail after the first ring. You declined his call. Finally he texted you, although he really didn't want to have this conversation over text. He knew he needed to do a better job at apologizing than just sending a few texts
“Can we please talk about this? I'm so sorry I just walked out, I wasn't thinking, I need to talk to you.”
You didn't reply.
The next day he called again, and still you didn't pick up.
The truth was, you were too embarrassed. Seeing him again, after he'd rejected you like that, was just too mortifying to consider. You felt so stupid. Of course kissing him was an outrageously dumb thing to do. He was your mentor, of course anything romantic was off the table. But you had a crush, and the adrenaline, combined with how sweet he was to you, made you lose any sense of reason.
Stupid little girl, kissing the man she never even had a chance with, because her emotions got the best of her.
But then why did he kiss you back?
That was what drove you insane. Of course you had a crush on him, it was painfully obvious from the first day you'd met him, but he'd always stayed professional, never giving you any reason to think that it was anything more than how a fan feels toward their idol, and that it ever would be. Unfortunately for you, your feelings towards him only got stronger over time.
Baekhyun had convinced himself that it was a good thing you liked him, that with him as your mentor, you'd work that much harder. He thought it was cute, the same way he thought of other fans' attitudes towards him, during fansigns and the like. He hadn't considered that maybe he'd gotten a little too close with you, that those lines started to feel blurred. In reality, you weren't just another fan, you were far from it. You were a real friend, you knew him.
It was easy for him to understand why you didn't want to see or talk to him after what happened. He knew he messed up, both when he kissed you back, and when he left the room. He couldn't even imagine what must've been going through your head. He hoped you weren't blaming yourself, sure you're an adult, but at ten whole years older than you, he knew he was the one responsible for making sure things stayed appropriate between you two, and he'd failed.
To his relief, you still did amazing for the rest of the debut promotions. He watched every performance, wishing he could've been there to support you.
Because of how busy you were you'd agreed a while ago to skip lessons for the first two weeks after debut, and as the days dragged on, Baekhyun was starting to worry that he wouldn't get to see you again for a lot longer than he'd like. He still knew he needed to apologize to you, and the longer you avoided him the guiltier he felt.
When promotions ended and he still hadn't heard from you, he reached out to your manager, asking when you'd have time for a lesson again.
She assured him that you'd be there next week at the same time and place as usual, and he breathed a sigh of relief. The days before the lesson dragged on for what felt like ages to him, but at least there was an end in sight.
When the time finally came, you were mortified, almost as badly as the first day you'd met him, or during your first lesson together, maybe even worse. He greeted you just as warmly as he always did, emphasizing how well you'd done during all the performances, and how he wished he could've been there for you. He did everything he could to try and relieve some of the tension and awkwardness, but you weren't there yet.
You were bright red, hating the unpleasant heat sweeping over you, burning your cheeks and making you uncomfortably sweaty. You couldn't talk to him, or even make eye contact, you were still too ashamed.
“Y/n?” You saw in your peripheral how he looked at you, and your eyes started to water. “I need to apologize for what happened after the showcase, I'm so sorry, I never should've put you in that situation, or kissed you back, or just left like I did. I was being reckless and stupid, the fault is all mine, and I understand if not, but I really hope you can forgive me.”
His heart sank when you started to cry, and although he'd told himself a million times that he wouldn't, that any physical contact with you was inappropriate, he still ended up holding you, giving you a shoulder to cry on.
“I'm such a fucking idiot.” You eventually let out between sobs, and he detached himself from you, finally meeting your eyes.
“Please don't say that, this is all on me. I'm the one who fucked up, not you.”
“But I'm the one- I-”
“Because I was being inappropriate. Like I said, I shouldn't have put you in that situation, that was my mistake.”
“I'm just so embarrassed.” It came out barely above a whisper.
“Nobody saw us, and I could never judge you for that. I know you just got caught up in the moment.”
You did your best to smile and nod, but the tears just kept coming. His words were sweet but did little to mend the pain and shame you still felt.
He wanted to reach out and wipe away your tears, to hold you, to comfort you as best he could, but he knew it would only worsen things. Once again, however, when you leaned into him for comfort, he let you do as you pleased, cursing himself for letting his very necessary boundaries slip away so easily.
This was bad, he knew it was. He didn't have the strength to push you away though he really should've. If this was going to continue, he had to do better, but he was coming to terms with the fact that he just wasn't able to.
He stayed holding you until the tears eventually slowed down, and came to a stop. Now that your face wasn't buried in his chest anymore, he shot you a soft smile. “Do you want to get to singing?”
Finally, you let out a small laugh. “Do we have to? Can we just talk? I missed you.”
He sighed, but nodded. He'd missed you too, but saying so didn't feel like a good idea.
He kept the conversation light, trying to make you laugh, anything to brighten your mood, if only for a little while. When the end of the lesson came, he knew he was going to have to be the bearer of bad news.
“Next week I promise we can actually sing again.” You told him as he led you to his car to bring you home.
He took a few deep breaths, and you were on your way to your dorm when he finally replied.
“I don't think it's a good idea for me to be mentoring you, or giving your lessons anymore.”
“What?”
He stopped at a red light, and the look of hurt and disappointment he saw when he looked over at you made his throat feel tight.
“I'll talk to your original voice teacher, to see when he can fit you into his schedule again, now that you're getting more advanced it'll be better for you to train with him anyway.”
You felt your lip start to quiver again. “You just don't want to be around me anymore now, I get it.” You mumbled, trying to hide the shakiness in your voice.
Baekhyun’s eyes squeezed shut for a second, “it's really not that, not at all.”
He was pulling up to your dorm and you just wanted to get away from him now before he saw you start to cry again. “You don't have to keep lying to me, I know I'm the one who fucked everything up with that stupid kiss.”
He parked, trying to think of how he could finally convince you that it wasn't your fault, but you were reaching for the door before he had the chance to say anything.
“Y/n, wait, please-”
You were already gone though, shutting the door behind you. As soon as you were outside of his car the tears came, and you tried to wipe them away as best you could as you hurried to your dorm.
When you got to the elevator you prayed nobody would see you like this. You'd spent so much of the evening in tears, you knew you looked an absolute mess. You just wanted to get to your room where you could finally be alone and let it all out.
“Y/n, wait!”
You turned around, and there he was, jogging towards where you stood. Your stomach suddenly felt like it was in your throat, and then he was in front of you once again, this time taking both of your hands in his.
“I don't know what to tell you, for you to believe me, but it's not your fault, I swear. I- I don't want to stop teaching you either, really, but I can't keep being alone with you, not when I can't trust myself.”
All you could do was stare back at him, knowing that you were a tearful mess. What he was telling you didn't make any sense in your mind. You kissed him. Not the other way around.
“Please say something.” He was still panting a little as he said it, winded from having run after you.
“What does that even m-mean, you can't trust yourself? I'm the one who kissed you, and I'm definitely not stupid enough to try that again, so what does it matter?”
“I already told you, I shouldn't have put you, or us, in that situation in the first place.”
“But that doesn't fucking matter! Who cares if we're alone, we've been alone for the last two hours and it was fine.”
Only it really hadn't been fine, he knew that he shouldn't have been touching you at all.
You were staring back at him through tear filled eyes, and he felt absolutely terrible. He wanted to be able to comfort you, and eventually just gave in, throwing caution to the wind and wrapping his arms around you.
He just didn't have it in him to stand and watch you cry, knowing that he was the reason. This time he felt the way you grabbed onto the back of his shirt, keeping him from moving away.
“Please don't cry, I'm sorry, really, I just want what's best for you. We would still see each other occasionally around the company, it's not like this is goodbye forever.”
“I- I don't want lessons with anyone else. You're the whole reason I was able to debut, you can't just leave me now. Please.”
You were still holding onto him, and with every “please” you added, he was slipping. He hoped that you would eventually calm down, and he would be able to reason with you, to finally make you understand why he couldn't be around you so much anymore.
He had no such luck. All you could think about was how badly you would miss him, how lost you would feel if he stopped mentoring you, the last few weeks had been bad enough already, the only thing that got you through without him was your embarrassment and how busy you'd been. You couldn't lose him, you needed him.
Every minute that he listened to you cry because of him, he felt his rationality fade. As much as he knew he needed to distance himself, he wasn't going to do it if it hurt you that badly.
You felt him take a deep breath, and finally, a soft “okay” fell from his lips.
It wasn't until then that he felt your grip on him loosen, and you looked up at him.
“What? Really?” You sniffled, face still wet.
He nodded, running one hand through your hair, moving it from where it had started to stick to your face.
Once again, your arms were thrown around him, but at least this time, it was because you were happy. You must've said thank you to him a million times that night, as you felt the relief wash over you. Baekhyun was all too aware of the way your chest pressed against his own.
When he was finally free of your arms around him, you were beaming up at him, and he couldn't help but smile back. “You should get to your dorm before people start getting worried.”
You nodded, pressing the button and hugging him one more time before the elevator arrived.
“Bye” he waved, as you stepped inside and the doors started to shut “see you next week.”
He knew he was in too deep, and he was a fool to give in to you, but now it was too late. He was going to have to live with his decision and try to keep things from going further, but he
knew deep down that realistically, he didn’t have that kind of self control, not with you.
~
Baekhyun hadn’t planned on seeing you again until the next lesson, but when your debut song entered the top ten on all the major charts just a few days later, he wanted to celebrate, and invited you to a nice dinner. That day you spent hours getting ready, putting on your favorite dress and making sure your hair and makeup were perfect. You knew that it wasn’t a date, but the way you felt leading up to him arriving could’ve fooled you.
He picked you up and drove you to the restaurant, pulling up in the back where there was already somebody waiting to lead you to a private dining area where you’d be out of sight of the public. You hadn’t really thought about it, but you understood why it would probably be better for your dinner with him to stay between the two of you.
It was the first time you’d been around him just to hang out, more as a friend than a student, and you thought it was magical. You were nervous at first, still having all of the past drama with him on your mind, but he was his usual wonderful self, easily leading the conversation, making you laugh until your stomach hurt, and he too felt it, how easy and right this was. You ended up at the restaurant with him for over two hours, neither of you wanting the night to end. Finally the awkward tension from the previous weeks was gone, replaced with optimism and gratitude for still having him in your life.
When he finally dropped you off, he got out of the car to walk you inside, and you ended up alone with him, standing in front of the elevator once again.
“Thank you for tonight,” You started, “everything still feels kind of surreal, I can’t believe this is actually my life now. And it’s all thanks to you.”
“You always had it in you.” He said and smiled that lovely warm smile. You were about to press the button to take you upstairs, but he stopped you, looking around to make sure you were alone. “Wait- I know I tell you all the time that I’m proud of you and how far you’ve come, but I really can’t say it enough. I’m really lucky that I get to teach you. You have something special, truly.”
You and him got stuck in a weird place, neither one talking, but not making any effort to leave either. The way he was looking at you pulled you in, and you thought you saw something flash across his face, something you hadn’t seen before. He stepped closer, close enough that you could feel his breath against your skin, and your heart rate skyrocketed, confused. He wasn’t sure what came over him, he must be insane.
“Baekhyun?” You barely whispered, but he didn’t explain himself, instead he leaned in, and he kissed you.
Your mind was going a million miles a minute and it made no sense to you whatsoever, but he was kissing you, softly, sweetly, like something out of one of the many day dreams you’d had about him. As quickly as it started he was pulling away again, his face tinted a deep shade of pink, smiling a bit bashfully at you, still too shocked to react.
“Goodnight.” He whispered, and then he was walking back to his car.
After that, things felt completely different with him. The hugs got longer, his words sweeter, and every time he dropped you off, he’d again kiss you goodnight. It wasn’t only after your weekly lessons together that he would drive you around either, you and him began to spend more and more time together, and had to get more and more cautious about not being seen.
You would sneak out in big hoodies with a mask on to walk to where he was waiting in the parking lot, just to drive around all night with him in one of his fancy cars, talking, singing, and sometimes pulling off to the side of a quiet road where he would lean over and kiss you, though it never went any further. He knew that sneaking around with and kissing his student was bad enough, anything more, and in public, would be a whole different kind of stupid.
Both of you started to lie a lot, to your managers, friends, anyone really who would question or even just ask about your relationship. To everyone else, he was still just your mentor, a strict student-teacher agreement and no more. The lying should’ve been your first clue as to how wrong it all was, but you were blinded by your feelings for him. Getting to be alone with him, kiss him, and talk to him about things no one else knew was too all consuming for you to even think twice about it.
How you talked to each other changed too. When you were alone with him he would call you baby, treating you less like a student, or even just a friend, and more as a lover. You should’ve been happy, thrilled, even, and you were when you were with him, but when he’d drop you off and you’d be alone in your dorm again, you’d break down.
The late nights together, the romance, the kisses, they were all wonderful in the moment, but afterwards you’d always part ways, realizing that it was all fleeting, that any relationship beyond what you already had with him was impossible, because no matter how you might feel about each other, you were still his student, and far too young to be involved with him in any deeper way. No number of kisses or secret rendezvous would make him yours, he made that clear. You would always end up alone in your dorm at the end of it all, crying, knowing it would never turn into anything more.
Seeing him during lessons was a different experience now. There would be other people around, and they didn’t think twice seeing you together, but you and Baekhyun would give each other knowing looks, or he’d wink at you, or something else to signify your little secret. You and him almost had a special secret language, joking with each other often with little more than a glance.
Even your manager didn’t know about you and him, she knew that he was mentoring you, but she’d known him for so long, she never even suspected that he might be acting inappropriately with you, he just didn’t seem like that kind of guy.
The two of you had everyone fooled, and while it felt exciting on the surface, it also grew a new kind of shame within you, knowing that what you were doing was deeply wrong.
What you had with him wasn’t real, and never should or could be, and it was starting to tear you apart. It took you weeks of working up the courage to do so, but finally, during a lesson, you decided you were going to confront him with all of it.
“Can I ask you something?”
Baekhyun shrugged. “Sure.”
“But you have to promise you'll answer honestly!”
“Okay! I promise.”
You took a deep breath. “What are we doing?”
“What do you mean?”
“You know exactly what I mean. The sneaking around, the kissing, what is that about?”
He'd been perfectly relaxed, but you could see how he tensed up as he realized what you were talking about.
“Y/n, I don't think it's a good idea for us to talk about that right now-”
“You said you'd answer!”
A long sigh left him, eyes squeezing shut for a second. “Okay, okay. I’m just doing what feels right. You know I like you, but you also know that we can’t just act like we’re together either.”
“Why?”
“You know why.”
“Cause it’s inappropriate? We both know that this entire arrangement hasn't been appropriate since you decided to mentor me, knowing that I have a huge crush on you.”
You wanted to finally hear it from him, wanted him to admit that he'd been just as irresponsible as you, and Baekhyun didn't say a word. It was the hard truth that he'd been trying for so long to avoid, and you threw it right in his face.
“Ever since then it feels like you've been slowly leading me on, acting like we have something special but never letting it feel completely real, when you're the one who started all this in the first place, and let it get this far.”
He stared at you, and he knew he couldn't keep it up anymore, couldn't keep ignoring it. He saw your hurt and frustration clear as day, and finally, he broke.
“I'm a fucking idiot. I know I am, I'm an idiot and knew that getting so close with you was a terrible idea but I ignored all of that because I like you too much, I never intended for us to end up like this and feel like a huge asshole because I know I'm in a position where it's completely wrong of me to touch you at all because of how we met and the power dynamic but still every time I see you that's all I can think about.”
“Do you really not understand how cruel you're being?”
You scoffed at how genuinely confused he looked.
“I've liked you so much for so long, you know I have, and you just waltz into my life and start talking to me and then teaching me and then offering to mentor me, when you know I can't help but fall for you. You even make it clear that you like me back, inviting me out with you and kissing me but never truly acknowledging what it means, it feels fucking awful. You keep stringing me along because you like me even though you know you can't give me what I really want. You're such a selfish asshole for that.”
Your voice grew less and less stable and Baekhyun saw how the tears gathered in your eyes, threatening to spill over.
He knew there was no use trying to argue with you, he'd gotten himself into this mess and he knew he was the one to blame. “What do you want me to do?”
“I don’t know. But it can’t go on like this, it hurts too much.”
The small room fell silent and all you could do was stare at each other. You looked so defeated, the guilt nearly brought him to tears, and he did the only thing he could think to do.
He held your face in his hands, bringing you close, letting his lips meet your own.
Kissing him was just as electrifying as it always was, only this time, he didn't stop, didn't hold back. You got lost in the feeling, savoring the familiar taste and feel of finally getting what you craved again. This time though, it couldn't end the way it always did. Something had to change, so you pulled away.
“You can’t just kiss me again and then keep on the same way. Please, I need more.”
His face fell, because he knew he couldn’t give you that. “Y/n, I’m sorry, but you know why I can’t do that, why it has to be like this.”
And he was right, of course you understood, but that didn’t make it hurt any less. It would be the end of his career if he was seen with you, and even his close friends would be raising eyebrows. He was so much older, your teacher, and your idol. What you wanted was completely impossible. “I care about you, a lot, you know I do. I also wish it wasn’t like this but we don’t have another choice.”
“So what? You keep stringing me along, and I just have to live with it? Knowing that no matter how much we may want it, we’ll never be able to be together?”
He sighed, and frowned at how sad you looked. “Can’t we just be grateful for what we do have?”
You shook your head, “I want too much.”
Despite everything you said, you and him both knew that you wouldn't be able to walk away, and neither would he. So when he took your face in his hands, whispered another “I'm sorry,” and kissed you again, you melted into him effortlessly.
It was heated and messy, both letting out all your grief and frustration, clinging to each other almost desperately. He kissed you harder, deeper than he had before, until this time he was the one to pull away, though he didn't move far, looking at you with a look that while apologetic, was still hopeful.
“I can't give you what you want, but if we're careful, I can take you home with me. For tonight, we can act like it’s real.”
Before, taking you home with him had always been off the table. You were both too easily recognizable, and being seen in his building together would make it dead obvious that your relationship was more than it should be, so it didn’t even seem like an option.
Wide eyed, you nodded, and not even a half hour into the lesson he was sneaking you carefully out of the practice room, and then the building, into his car. You texted your manager some bullshit excuse as to why you'd be gone for the night, and then you were on your way to his place, for the very first time.
You could hear the rapid pounding of your own heart as he drove you through the night, unsure but excited. Even if it was only for one night, and he was risking far too much, you were going to hold onto whatever you could get.
When he pulled into his building’s garage, he gave you a hat and a mask to put on, he pulled up his hood and put his own mask on, saying a short prayer before getting out of the car, and walking in with you. If anyone saw and recognized you both, he would be fucked, so he hurried, and luckily you made it to his apartment without running into anyone.
Once inside you both let out a sigh of relief. You were alone with him, truly alone, no chance of passers by seeing you, or label mates catching onto your relationship, just you and him, all night.
When you felt his hand on your own, pulling you closer, it robbed you of your breath. He took his mask off, and then yours, and leaned in, though his lips only barely met your own before he was looking at you once again. “I’ve wanted you so badly, and I know it’s wrong and I’m an idiot and an asshole for doing this, but I just can’t bring myself to stay away from you.”
“So don’t. I’ve never wanted anyone the way I want you. I’m all yours.”
You looked up at him, eyes sparking with all the hope and clueless naivety he should expect from you, a girl of barely twenty, who’d grown up loving him, and was powerless not to fall into his trap, whether he’d set it on purpose or not. He was a man ten years your senior, who positioned himself as an authority figure in your life, someone who should never touch you, kiss you, or anything even close.
The guilt manifested as a lump in his throat, knowing that your feelings for him, your willingness to ignore how wrong it all was, were because of him.
Still, he kissed you, with a kind of passion that was new to you both. Without any risk of getting caught, he let himself hold you tighter, let the kiss get more and more heated. He led you to the couch, where you ended up on his lap, his hands on your hips as his lips wandered to your neck, kissing, biting, enough to make you gasp and shiver, but not leave marks.
For you it was otherworldly, lightheaded and dizzy with disbelief as his hands and lips stayed glued to your skin, finally living out the fantasies that played in your head when you laid alone at night, longing for him. You’d kissed boys in the past, but none of them came anywhere close to the way he made you feel. You were convinced nobody could ever make you feel the things Baekhyun could, and all he’d done was kiss you. He wasn’t some boy, he was a man, he knew what he was doing, and you wanted more. Every last little piece of him.
The restraint was gone. He wanted you just as badly, and that was all he could focus on. When you pushed your hips further into him, he groaned at the friction, easily getting carried away. You felt, looked, sounded, tasted, even smelled divine to him. He’d been hard for a good while already, and this time when you rolled your hips and he felt you against him, he let out a satisfied groan.
That only encouraged you further and you kept moving, lips moving heatedly against his, as you started to get yourself off against him, his hands on your ass guiding you.
“I want more.” You breathed out when he pulled back for air. “Where’s your bedroom?”
Baekhyun didn’t answer, rather he stood, your legs still wrapped around him as he carried you away, until gently laying you down on his mattress.
With you he became a gentle, caring lover. Maybe it was your age, or the fact that he’d been your mentor, but the way he touched you was like you were something precious. Like if he wasn’t careful, you would break. Even as he positioned himself between your thighs, he was cautious, never moving too quickly, watching for any hesitation on your end.
But there was none, your desire for him was all-consuming in a way that was hard to understand, even in the moment. Without him pressed against you, you felt like you might actually die.
“I’m not made of glass, Baek. You don’t have to be so careful.”
“I know, I just… I want to treat you the way you deserve to be treated. I want this to be special.”
When his lips met yours for the nth time that day, you started to tug on his clothes, until his shirt was being pulled over his head and he got to work undressing you as well. One by one he took off your blouse, followed by the skirt you were wearing, next unhooking your bra, until all that was left on your body was a pair of lacy underwear. Still desperate for his affection, you kept your lips glued to his all you could, the added feel of his warm skin against your own stealing any rationality from your mind. All you could think of was him, you wanted him in a way you didn’t even know was possible.
He froze above you when your hand reached down, trying to get the button of his jeans undone.
Even the few seconds when his touch left you completely as he finished undressing himself felt torturous. A breath got stuck in your throat when you felt his hands at your hips, slowly pulling the last piece of clothing from your body before reclaiming his place between your thighs.
As your eyes met his and he started to move closer, you realized that there was something he needed to know.
“Wait- I should probably tell you, I’ve never done this before.”
You watched as the color drained from Baekhyun’s face, eyes wide. He hadn’t even considered that you might be a virgin, you were old enough to have some experience, but it shouldn’t have been that much of a surprise to him either. Those five words hit him like a punch in the gut.
He rolled off of you, hands running through his hair, eyes squeezed shut. “God, this is so fucked up.”
You sat up, taking one of his hands and he looked at you with uncertainty. “It’s not a big deal, but I’m sorry if that was a bit of a shock.”
He gave you a sympathetic, but worried look. “It is a big deal though, at least to me. This would be irresponsible enough if it wasn’t your first time, I don’t know if I can do this. I don’t want to be responsible for how you’ll feel afterwards.”
His words made your heart sink and a lump form in your throat. “What? No, please, Baekhyun, trust me, there isn’t anyone in the entire world that I would rather do this with than you, here and now. Please. I don’t think I’ve ever wanted anything this badly.”
“You have to realize how tough of a spot you’re putting me in.”
“I don’t care. I just want you, I’ve never been so sure of anything in my entire life. Please.”
You moved closer to him, linking your hands behind the back of his neck, taking him with you as you fell back onto the mattress. He looked down at you, still unsure.
“Please.”
He shushed you with another kiss, but had his own conditions if he was really going to be your first. “You have to tell me immediately if you feel uncomfortable at all, or if it hurts, and you can stop me at any point if you don’t want it anymore.”
You could see in his eyes the concern and uncertainty he was feeling, but you had gotten this far, and you knew what you wanted, and you wanted it bad. You nodded, and he was between your legs once again, the anticipation rising.
Baekhyun didn’t miss the way you gasped at the first touch of his length against your inner thigh. He wanted to make sure you were ready, that it didn’t hurt too badly, so he started with one finger inside you, slowly working it in and out, before adding a second. The wetness and your whimpers told him you were more than ready, easily taking his digits, and finally, he moved to replace them with his length.
You felt him position himself at your entrance, and you were certain you’d never felt that kind anticipation before, leaving you a shaking, panting mess underneath him.
You felt his hand softly against your cheek, and your eyes opened to meet his. “Y/n, baby. You’re sure you want this?”
You nodded without even a second of hesitation. “Yes, god, please.”
The softness of his kiss was a stark contrast to the intrusion of him pushing inside, the pain making your eyes squeeze shut and a whine pass your lips.
He stopped moving when he saw your reaction, giving you time to adjust to the new sensation. “Am I hurting you?”
It did hurt, but your desire overpowered any sign of discomfort. “Please don’t stop.”
With his forehead pressed to yours he kept going, until his hips were flush with yours. He felt your discomfort in how tense you were, staying still to let the pain subside.
“Baekhyun, please.”
You might’ve not minded the pain, too concerned with the intense need for more, but he wasn’t going to move until he knew you were okay.
“I know it hurts baby, you have to relax, can you do that for me?”
You whined in response but realized that he was right, you were extremely un-relaxed, and as you made a conscious effort to let go of all the tension in your body, the pain faded away.
He felt it, and saw how you melted into the mattress, and took it as his cue to start moving.
The first thrust had your back arching, moaning his name and he just kept going, setting a slow rhythm. You clung to him, moaning unabashedly, losing yourself to the new and incredible feeling of him inside you. Nothing could’ve prepared you for it, this was so much better than anything you’d been able to come up with in your own fantasies. Just the weight and warmth of him on top of you overwhelmed you, combined with the feeling of him pushing in, pulling out almost completely each time, before sinking back into you, it was like your own personal heaven. He was your own personal heaven.
It only got better as he kept moving, that familiar warm feeling building in the pit of your stomach. You’d had orgasms before, but what you could do with your own hands didn’t even compare to what he was doing to you. It was a wholly different, and far more intense sensation.
His lips collided with yours in a messy, lustful haze, praises passing his lips in between breaths. “You feel so good baby, so perfect, so beautiful.”
Those words heightened everything even more, his low voice sending chills running down your spine.
“Baek, please.”
You didn’t even know what you were begging for anymore, you were just imploring him for more, everything and anything he could give you, you wanted it. The feeling of him rolling his hips into you again and again clearing your mind, your pleasure and desire all consuming.
However he could see it in your eyes, how you needed more, and picked up the pace. The way he pushed himself into you, now faster, and with more force, had the tightness in your belly growing more intense by the second.
The build up was more intense than you ever knew possible, losing control as he continued his ministrations, until all at once, you fell.
The orgasm raged through you, leaving every nerve ablaze, as you shook and gasped at the overwhelming wave of pleasure.
Above you, Baekhyun was losing control too, still pushing inside deeply, teetering on the edge, but your fucked out expression combined with the way you clenched around him had him reaching his high soon after you, shuddering with a moan as he let go.
For a minute you both stayed just like that, panting, gasping, letting the climax slowly fade, until there was nothing left but a tangled web of sweaty limbs.
When he pulled out and rolled off of you, the loss of his warmth made you whine. You barely even noticed when he got up, soon returning with a wet towel, and cleaning you up.
He settled in next to you, and you smiled when his arm wrapped around you, pulling you into him.
Luckily the exhaustion did well to lull you to sleep, any painful thoughts being pushed to the morning, but you wouldn’t be able to escape them forever.
He woke you up with a kiss on the cheek, and at first it all felt so nice, so tender and intimate, in bed together with him as the sun began to poke through the curtains. Slowly he got up, and you followed, feeling the dull ache between your thighs as you stood.
Seeing the way you grimaced at the soreness, he was quickly at your side. “Shit, sorry.” He muttered.
You just let out a small laugh. “It’s okay, it was worth it, at least. Definitely worth it.”
He smiled, pulling his clothes on as you gathered your own, before doing the same. “Let’s get you home, before it gets busy and people could see us leaving here together."
There it was, the rude call back to reality. That your night with him was over, that now you would have to hide again, to sneak around, and constantly be reminded that he wasn’t really yours, and never would be.
Stupid, foolish girl.
You managed to make it back home without being spotted, and even his kiss goodbye couldn’t keep the sadness from taking you over. He noticed it too, how you seemed to shut down after making it to his car.
Back in your room, you let it all out, letting the tears seep into your pillow. Once again, he’d turned you into a complete mess, the pain and frustration leaving you broken.
Nobody could ever again give you what he could, could make you feel what he could. It was him, the man you’d looked up to and admired for so many years, and now after having slept with him, it was clearer than ever.
That was the nature of your relationship with him. You were powerless to him, and no matter how much it would ruin you, you'd let him do it, over and over again.
For him, you would ruin yourself, a million little times.
#baekhyun smut#exo smut#baekhyun fic#exo fic#baekhyun#exo#baekhyun fanfic#exo fanfic#kpop smut#baekhyun angst#exo angst
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masterlist
key: smut (s), suggestive (sg), fluff (f), angst (a), request (r), complete (c) [for series], popular(🌷), personal favorite (🌹)
EXO
— airport dads
— sugar daddy line
— exo when angry | r
— exo simping | sg 🌷
— jealous exo
— pda
— being shipped with another idol | r
kim minseok
— best friend | f
— in the morning | s, f, r 🌹
kim junmyeon
— sneakin’ | s, a
— nip slip | s 🌷
— testy | s 🌹
— handsome stranger | f
— strictly business | s, r 🌹
— yours | f, a, r
— wants & needs | s, f, r
byun baekhyun
— baby blues | f, a, r
— unplanned | a, r
— besos | f, r
— frisky | sg, r 🌹
— baby blues (vol. 2) | f, a, r
— soft side | f, r
— the bodyguard | f, a, r
— broken promises | a, r
— (computer) games | f, r
— cream soda | s, f, r 🌷
— all the rumors are true | f, a 🌷🌹
— closure | s, a
— fantasy | sg, a, f
kim jongdae
— coming soon
park chanyeol
— back 2 u | a, sg, r
— new thing (series) | s, f, a, c
— rainy day | s, r
— call me what you want, when you want, if you want | a, f, r
do kyungsoo
— make it up to you | s 🌹
— caught in the act | s, f 🌷🌹
— amore | f
— tender love | f, r
— ninety | a, f
— interruptions | f, sg 🌹
— swervin | s
kim jongin
— d appointment | s, f
— confessions | f, a (sequel to d appointment)
— friendly competition | f
— take a break | f, r
oh sehun
— 10:07 pm | s
— firsts | s, f, r
OTHER GROUPS
seventeen
— 21:34 | j. wonwoo, a/s/f 🌷🌹
— love without tragedy | j. wonwoo, a
— stay the night | k. mingyu, f
— silent night | w. junhui, s/f
— the boy is mine | l.chan, s
— never lose me | l.jihoon, s/f/a
#exo#exo imagines#exo scenarios#exo kai#exo sehun#exo smut#exo x reader#exo x you#exo fluff#exo angst#exo chen#exo chanyeol#exo do#exo suho#exo xiumin#exo baekhyun
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hi again and sorry for more request 😭 suddenly it came to my mind. could you write a married couple, baekhyun is 7-8 years older than her (if it's okay for you- and of course legal) and she wants a baby so bad but, baek is not ready or not want because of his wife. his wife has already graduated and he worries about her. but two of them have a big fight because of misunderstanding. some sad tears and hugs please! (You can write one of them for two request) thank you so much! 💓
pairing: byun baekhyun x reader
word count: 1086
genre: angst with a happy ending
warnings: arguing, mentions of pregnancy, tears, baekhyun trying to be a good husband but failing (depends on your point of view though)
a/n: the angst we wanted to badly!!!!! thanks for requesting <3
it was breaking his heart to see you like that. baekhyun could see your tears falling from your eyes, arms protectively wrapped around your body, hugging your stomach.
it's not that he didn't want a baby - he wanted it, so badly. just... not now.
baekhyun already had to live with that tiny little feeling of guilt, as he always thought he had stolen your youth. he was much older than you when you two started to date and, even though it was legal, he knew that part of him was wrong for wanting you.
you were young, in the glory of your 20 years; he was an adult already, turning 28 and thinking about what he wanted for the future. you had so much to live yet, people to kiss, drinks to try, places to go; he already had a good career, had already collected some heartbreaks, and knew exactly how he liked his whiskey.
it was kind of selfish of him, baekhyun always thought. how he loved you so much and wanted you to grow and live and experience things, but how he still couldn't let you go, because he needed you and craved for you like he never did with anyone else.
when you got into college, baekhyun promised himself that he would be the best husband - he would support you, but also give you enough space to live that part of your life. and he did, you know? from taking you to bed at 2am because you were still trying to finish that project, to getting up at 3am because you got drunk at a college party. he did his best, stayed beside you through it all, and was there to applaud you when you graduated, years after.
he wanted a baby with you. god only knows how many nights he went to sleep picturing both of you having a family together, living happily ever after. but gosh, he was doing fine in allowing you to live, how could he agree to having a baby when you just started the career you wanted so much?
"is it...", you tried to speak, but had to take a moment. "is it because my body will change?"
"what?"
"because, you know... i'm not a little girl anymore. my body has already changed so much from when we started dating, but if this is the problem, then..."
"y/n, please", baekhyun's soft voice stopped you. "it has nothing to do with you. believe me when i say that it's not about you."
"then it's about who? us? you don't love me anymore?"
baekhyun sighed, heart breaking just at the mere mention of those words.
"it hurts me that you could even consider that..."
"then tell me the reason!", you said, this time a bit louder, emotion getting the best of you and tears still filling your eyes. "because i've dedicated my whole life to you, and i truly want to keep doing that and making both of our dreams of becoming parents come true. so why won't you let me?"
"exactly because of that", he said, defeated. "because you already did way too much for me. you took care of me, you loved me, held me when i was sick, when i was sad... you did everything when you should be out, living your life while you're young, not here with me. and i'm so grateful for that, please don't ever get me wrong - i love you so, so much it hurts, and i wish i could give you the world in return for all you did. and i feel like i can finally give you at least half of it now, as you're finally working where you've always wanted and being happy. i can't ask you to put that aside now just because i wanna be a dad... i-i just can't."
when baekhyun finally took a deep breath, his tears also started to fall. he had told you before, about the guilt he carried all these years, and you knew it would never pass - no matter how much you tried to reassure him.
"you get so blind trying to protect me sometimes, that you forget to ask me what i want", you mumbled just loud enough for him to hear.
getting up from the couch, you walked over to where he was, sitting down on the floor in front of him. baekhyun tried his best not to look at you, as he knew he would lose everything the moment he did - all his composure, all the feelings he was still trying to hold back.
you knew your husband, so you just went as far as laying your head on his knee, eyes focused on his face even though he was probably counting how many books you two had on the shelf as a way to not burst into tears.
"i chose to live with you. i was young, yeah, but i knew what i was doing", you began. "and i've never, ever regretted that choice, not even once. because the love you have for me is exactly like the love i have for you, baek. we're what, 8 years into our relationship now? and i'll never get tired of reminding you that. i love you, i always will. i appreciate the way you try to take care of me, but even though i'm younger than you, i know what i'm doing. so if i say i can have a baby now, then it's because i truly do."
baekhyun closed his eyes for a second, and through his beautiful lashes, more tears fell.
"but what about..."
"don't worry about my job", it was your time to stop him. "i have everything figured out, and i know it's the perfect time for us to try. you were the one who taught me how to be organized and how to make plans. have some faith in me, love..."
"i do", he opened his eyes to look at yours. "i trust you with my life."
"then let's try. let's become parents, put a little baby into this world as a way to tell everyone how much we love each other."
like a baby himself, baekhyun pouted and, suddenly, he crumbled in front of you, crying and sobbing. you quickly got up, sitting on his lap and pulling him in for a hug.
"i love you", baekhyun whispered to you.
"i love you so much", you whispered back. "there's no one in this world i would rather make my dreams come true with."
#byun baekhyun imagines#byun baekhyun x reader#byun baekhyun x you#byun baekhyun angst#byun baekhyun fanfic#baekhyun imagines#baekhyun x reader#baekhyun x you#baekhyun angst#baekhyun fanfic#exo imagines#exo x reader#exo x you#exo fanfic#exo angst#kpop imagines#kpop fanfic#kpop scenarios#exo#byun baekhyun#baekhyun#exo baekhyun
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when you caught a flu and he still wanted a kiss
< pick your own member (male) x y/n (gen reader), fluff >
note: wow uhm i’m writing again? well slowly and mostly because i’ve been sick for 2 days now and i want my giant baby tofu man jeon wonwoo + his cuddles and i feel like he would do this sooooo tada :D i hope you enjoy! and also please stay healthy!!!
“One. Just one.”
You shook your head no, relieving a sigh before snuggling closer (if it was even possible) to your boyfriend.
You could hear him let out a small disappointed sigh, wrapping his long limbs around your middle as you both lay in bed of your home.
He had sneaked a few hours out of his busy schedule to come and visit you after you insisted on him that you’re fine, it’s just a seasonal change flu and that he doesn’t have to worry about it, but him being him… well. As to his own words, “i had to make sure with my own pair of eyes that you are okay.”
So there he was, cuddling you and your cold. Yet still nagging your ears off for a one tiny soft kiss. Because he misses you and that you’re sick so to him, a kiss could seal the deal. Because you are sick. Trying to reassure you for countless of times that he would not catch the flu from it. Best of luck.
You rested your head on his chest, feeling the warmth of both of your bodies held close like your lives depended on it. He nuzzled his nose on top of your head before planting a kiss on your forehead. He hung his face lower to give your red nose the same affection before whispering “get well soon baby, i miss kissing you.”
You smiled into his shirt, blinking a few times before landing a smack on his chest as your last warning.
#nct imagines#seventeen imagines#nct fluff#seventeen fluff#nct smut#seventeen smut#nct angst#seventeen angst#exo imagines#exo fluff#exo smut#exo angst#monsta x imagines#monsta x fluff#elsville#bts imagines#bts fluff#bts smut#the boyz imagines#the boyz fluff#the boyz smut#kpop imagines
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— reunion "exo kai x male reader" PT 1
♡ pairing : kim jongin x male reader (m/n)
♡ genre : angst, fluffish (2nd part won't hurt as much)
♡ warning : relationship conflict, feeling of abandonment
╰┈➤ AUTHOR'S NOTE : hi there, my name is yunqi~ this is my first time writing in quite some time so give me some grace~~ please welcome me into the fam, i've got more to come !! p.s I know this is short, but this is just a small excerpt, I just wanted to get back into that groove.
feel free to request some stuff in my inbox, my brain is a little foggy at the moment
There was a faint knock at the door, M/n barely heard it. Luckily, he was expecting someone. A special someone.
Last night M/n and his friends, well almost all of his friends, gathered together in his small shabby apartment and threw a reunion party. It had been 5 years since all of them graduated high school. And as fun as it was seeing all of his friends, half of M/n attention hung around the door waiting for a knock.
When the night ended, M/n was foolishly mistaken that the person he was looking for would come. He never was able to make time for him back then, why would that change 5 years later?
M/n sighed, getting up from his comfortable position sitting criss-cross on the living room floor. The doorbell rang, and he moaned, “I’m coming, I’m coming.” He lightly jogged towards the front door, sliding into his slippers. As he reached for the door handle, he pulled and looked down as if thinking there was a package. But this package was more like a gift. M/n’s eyebrows furrowed as he saw a pair of Chuck Taylor’s, tattered and worn. The same shoes he gave to his… well, first love.
“Hello, stranger.” A familiar voice slipped into M/n ears. His body instantly felt warm. M/n’s mouth fell agape as he looked up at the male in front of him. After all these years, M/n felt like he was so ready to see the one who got away yesterday, now, he’s at a loss for words.
“You’re staring. I feel put on the spot now.”
“Ah, no. No, don’t feel that way. It’s good to see you… Jongin or Kai, or ya’ know whatever you go by now.” M/n sheepishly said, biting back his tongue at his complete awkwardness.
“Jongin is fine. To be honest, nobody calls me that very much anymore. And it feels nostalgic hearing you stay my name again.” Jongin flashed that stupid cheeky grin he does, M/n might as well just melt right there.
“Oh… being an idol… Can’t imagine.”
Jongin chuckled, pressing his weight on the door frame, “You’ve got a good face, nice voice…” Jongin tilted his head looking at M/n up and down as if he were going to comment on the latter’s body, “But those bunny slippers? Can’t dance in those.”
M/n sucked his tongue, “You jerk.” He rolled his eyes and stepped to the side, gesturing for Jongin to step into the apartment. Jongin giggled as he entered into the apartment, slipping his shoes off next to the pile of random shoes.
“You missed everyone yesterday, why didn’t you call?”
Jongin placed his keys and wallet on the island in the kitchen, hanging his jean jacket on one of the bar stools. “I’m sorry about that. The work building has been a buzz for a while now. You know, comebacks and all.”
“Mhm, right.” M/n did not know. In fact, M/n didn’t even know Jongin was an idol. He found out via text message months later.
“But I’m here now and-”
“And the last you didn’t show up to an outting was-”
“I don’t-”
“Wanna talk about it?”
Jongin reached for the back of his neck, “We still like cutting each other off. That’ll never change, huh?”
“But you did.” M/n spat, arms crossed as his smaller frame stood in front of Jongin’s. Jongin’s hands dropped to his sides as he drew in a sharp breath. “I want to talk about this. The others aren’t around this time, so speak freely.”
“I- Um, shit… I don’t know. It’s a lot.”
M/n bit back his attitude, “You left me, Kim Jongin. You chose to live your life without me. A life without your best friend. Your boyfriend. Your soulmate.”
“Hey, no one left you, M/n. I admit I didn’t choose the best choice when it came to us, but, I had an opportunity. And how was I supposed to know there was gonna be all these restrictions? Being an idol is hard, but living without you was harder.”
M/n turned away as he felt the tears warming up in his eyes. Jongin gently put his hands on each of the smaller’s shoulders. “Look at me. Would you look at me please?”
“No. Go away.”
#exo#exo k#exo x reader#exo x you#exo x male reader#kai#kim jongin#jongin#lgbtq#kpop x male reader#kpop boys#kpop bg#yunqitv#kai x reader#kai x male reader#exo fluff#exo angst
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For all the moments
✴︎ pairing : Chanyeol x Reader
✴︎ genre : domestic!au, idol!chanyeol, editor!reader, angst, fluff, comfort, yearning
✴︎ summary : For all the moments, you were always by his side. For all the moments, he was always next to you.
✴︎ warning : none, maybe mild cursing but nothing else!
✴︎ word count : 4.2K
✴︎ author’s note : hii! It’s archie! This one has been hanging out on my drafts for way too long and I finally decided it’s time to take it out! Anyways, this fic was initially for Baekhyun but I felt that the scenario fits better with Chanyeol. I was highly inspired by EXO-SC’s Jet-lag and Kyungsoo’s recent birthday party where he sang Beautiful Day! I hope you enjoy this one and feel free to leave feedback or comments! likes are also much appreciated ♥
—
The loud drizzling sounds of rain hitting your apartment window can’t help but stir you up from your deep slumber. What the hell, you thought, rubbing your eyes a little to wash away your sleepiness. The clock beside your bedside table reads 3.40am, the timing indicates that it’s too early for anyone to be awake at the moment. The sky kept rumbling, with thunders flashing every minute and you groaned at the sight of the storm rolling in front of you. Being woken up from a storm was one thing but being awake without your husband, was another thing. You knew you wouldn’t be able to sleep again so you grabbed your phone to check if Chanyeol had landed in Seoul from his recent work trip from Paris.
Notifications
02.30am KST
Yeol:
> Babe?
> I just landed with the worst weather ever!
> I can't wait to see you
> I missed you so much :((
Read 03.43am KST
Being married for 2 years to one of the most famous idol in Korea, you were accustomed to his busy schedule. Flying out here and there to attend concerts, award shows, photoshoots and prestigious events was part of the job. With you working as a fashion editor, his daily agenda was not out of the ordinary for you. The difference only being the fact that he works under the limelight, but you don’t—not that you mind at all. Nevertheless, both of you made it work. It was too easy to understand how it feels to work under a tight schedule without any time to breathe. You with your never-ending deadlines and meetings, and him with his idol life.
However, dating him for 6 years and being married to him for three, being away from him never gets easier.
You zoned out for a while before a loud thud distracted your attention, followed by your bedroom door clicking open. Your husband was finally home, his tall frame resting against the door with a huge grin on his face. Even with the minimal lighting of your bedroom, you could make up the bags under his sparkling eyes and the sight made you frown.
“Hii honey,” his voice soft as ever, “I missed you so much..”
You sat up beaming at him while reaching out, welcoming him with open arms. He took a step closer to the bed, engulfing your sleepy figure. You replied with a small ‘hello’ as you melted into his hug. You really can’t help but wonder how he’d smell so nice after a long-haul flight, but nevertheless, you love inhaling his scent that brings you nothing but comfort.
“How long have you been awake? The storm must’ve woken you up.” His voice was laced with worry.
You held his cheeks with your hands and he practically melt under your touch,
“Not too long ago.”
“Please quickly shower and join me in bed, huh? Pretty please…” you pouted at his tired state.
“Anything for you, baby. Give me a while and I’ll join you as soon as possible!”
He didn’t close the door as he showered, not that you’d mind, at this point you were too sleepy to even think of peeking. As the water ran down on his back, he unconsciously kept you awake by chatting with you. He really couldn’t help that he missed his wife so much.
“Babe, do you have plans tomorrow?”
“No? Not that I could think of…I might drop by the studio and the office tomorrow morning but other than that, I don’t think I’ll be booked the whole day. Are you going somewhere tomorrow?”
“The office? Isn’t tomorrow like..Saturday? Is Saerim giving you a hard time? What about the interns? They’re not helping you enough? Are you working too hard again?” He rambled on with concern with a raised voice as the running water muffled his voice.
“I- Uh..” you stammered, “Yeol, I t-told you work is fine” you quipped. The sound of the water subsided as a tall figure emerged from the bathroom. Chanyeol dried his hair, ruffling the soft brown locks with a towel as he frowned at your response. He knew you were having a hard time at work and had asked you to quit a thousand times by now. Even without the math, anyone would know that his pay would be enough for the both of you to live comfortably.
You looked at your golden-retriever husband in the eye, “So where are you going tomorrow?”
A thing about Chanyeol is that he’d waive things out so easily, as easy as shifting the conversation to another topic and he won’t go back to pester the elephant in the room.
At your question he blinks a few times, “Would you mind if I take a day out tomorrow with the boys? Baek said he needed some pointers for his upcoming solo album and Junmyeon-Hyung had things to discuss for the group.” He scratched the back of his head.
“But that is…if it’s okay with you?” he nervously asked.
“That’s okay, babe…” you half yawned, sleep lulled you once again as you tried snuggling inside the comforter,
“I really don’t mind”, the drowsiness took you as the soft satin sheets came in contact with your skin. He smiled at the sight as he returned the towel to its place. Chanyeol didn’t take long to join you in bed, cuddling you in his arms.
After his hectic schedules and weeks without holding you, being beside you was the perfect medicine to charge his tired form. He sighed, relieving all his weariness before the slumber took him out.
He knew, this was home.
You, were home.
—
Morning came faster than you’d like. The rain from last night hadn’t stopped, raindrops trickling on your high-floor apartment as the sky was still dark as ever. Beside you, a tired giant, possessively hugging you amidst his sleep. You giggled at this grown-up man’s clingy behaviour. Chanyeol will always be the cutest, ever.
You blamed your body clock for waking up so early on a Saturday, especially on this dreading Saturday.
With a little struggle, you free yourself from Chanyeol’s hold and tiptoed to the kitchen. It was just 6.00am but you quickly prepared breakfast for the both of you and salad, for Chanyeol just in case he wants a light lunch.
As you sipped your coffee, last night’s conversation went through your head. He knew you had troubles at work, he had plans and you said you were okay, you didn’t mind.
You internally sighed because mind you did.
You were far from okay.
Because even though you’d hate to admit it, you’d love to have him for yourself. In fact, you have missed him so much these past few weeks that it physically hurts.
But no.
You had work.
Your useless-piece-of-a-shit-partner Yoon Saerim, will probably taunt you if you don’t come up with a better concept for this month’s pictorial. So even though you miss being around your ball of sunshine more than you’d like to admit, fate was just not in your favour this Saturday.
You could always quit, is what Yeol usually says after your long rant about your horrible boss and the disgusting amount of workload you had to handle. Sure you have subordinates and interns working under you, but working in fashion for so long, you came to the conclusion that nothing is never ever enough when it comes to the industry.
Thinking back, Chanyeol always loved being under the spotlight as an idol ever since his debut days and making music was as precious as that. After both of you settled down and eventually got married, you were quick to admit that Chanyeol sacrificed a lot for you, even if you didn’t ask him to. He paid the bills, every bill. He took care of the parents, dinner dates with your parents and his every other week were a staple and he’d never miss sending health supplements once in a while. You never asked him to do so but married Chanyeol just stepped up and took on the role as a caring husband so naturally.
Even with his burning passion in music, he went the extra mile, producing countless songs by the count of months. At times he goes on an overdrive, he’d lock himself up in the studio and he would forget about everything else. Situations like this scares the shit out of you. You remembered the first time he went berserk, it took you and his members two days to figure out where he was. He’d gone AWOL and you had to call the police to track down his phone, just to find out that he’d been coping himself in the studio for 48 hours without sleep or food, only water. You and Sehun found him sitting down in front of the recording booth with a guitar in hand, music sheets sprawled on the floor. His eyes were already bloodshot red, it was clear that he was sleep-deprived, very tired and out of focus. Sehun sighed, ready to scold Yeol for his stupid behaviour before your husband quipped,
“Please don’t take me away, not yet…”
his eyes all over the place with brows furrowed, his forehead creasing.
“I swear if you give me more time, I’ll finish this tomorrow and I’ll go but please leave and don’t come here until tomorrow, yeah? I need to finish this song because they’ll pay a huge amount for this one… Give me more time, please?” He is disassociated as ever, you were aware that he didn’t notice you due to his state.
“Hyung…” the younger sighed again.
“S-Sehun-ah, I have Y/N now.. You might not know how it feels now but I- I want to give the world to her. We’re idols but our prime time is way past us, when the momentum is gone, we might too.” He dropped his head to the door of the recording booth as he sighed,
He mindlessly draws patterns on the floor, “I need to save up for Y/N, for our future.. and it won’t happen if I don’t work like this. So-“
In a blink you crouched down, embracing him with tears already wetting your face. Words couldn’t form but the pressure, the knot that he bear was starting to unravel. He got your message,
You’re enough.
Moments like these, his breakdowns, were one of the things that kept you grounded. If you’re being honest, your job also keeps you on your feet. Working as an co-chief editor in fashion was always your dream and to be frank, you enjoyed the job more than you let on. But the past year has been nothing but hell, thanks to the newly appointed co-chief editor Yoon Saerim. You habitually ponder how she got the position as she wasn’t really suitable for the job, she didn’t really have the knack for fashion. But moreover, you just didn’t like the fact that she ogled Chanyeol and Sehun when they came by for a photoshoot.
You quickly snapped out of your deep thoughts when you gulped your last drop of coffee, thinking of Yoon Saerim never fails to make you turn sour.
Without wasting more time, you prepared yourself to head to your studio. For disclaimer, the studio was Chanyeol’s, not the office’s. Not long after you started the job years ago, both of you decided that it would be nice to rent out an old apartment in the city for the both of you to work. The studio has a built-in recording booth, production space for Chanyeol and a creative working-space for you. However, with time passing, you ended up using the space more than your husband.
Before you left the house, you gave him a forehead kiss and stuck a post-it-note on his phone,
‘Good Morning My Happy Virus ♡
thank you for always working so hard,
sometimes you worry me, love :(
have a great time with the boys today!
am out for work - it’s deadline week ◡̈
i love you 3000
— much, much love, Y/N ‘
—
You arrived at the empty studio with your shoulders slumped, looking at the stacked paper, pictorials and mood boards around your disoriented workspace. The interns must’ve sent these yesterday, fucking hell, here we go again.
Not long after, you succumbed to the job you love and hate at the same time. To be honest, as one of the high-ranked chief editor in your company, it wasn’t your share to do these tasks anymore, those days were over you. But reviewing each and every item, every trend that goes into the magazine is a job you love no matter how meticulous it actually is. Besides, the information you extract from all this has proven to help your career so far, making you one of the sought-out fashion editors in Seoul. However the fact doesn’t relieve you from the burden and pressure you get from your useless co-chief editor.
“She’s bossy and pushy but useless— and you’re too compliant, Babe,” Chanyeol would always joke and you’d usually tackle him back with a pillow, leaving both of you cackling in the process.
Speaking of Chanyeol, the man in question just stirred up from bed, barely opening his eyes, adjusting to the gloomy weather in front of his open-windowed bedroom. He instantly rubbed his sides, sleep evidently washed away when he realised his beloved Y/N weren’t there. He called your name out a few times to make sure that maybe, you were outside the room, just to know that his voice had filled the void of your apartment.
As expected, he immediately sat up and grabbed his phone to call you. Before even unlocking his cell, he found your oh-so-lovely note that you stuck on this morning. Chanyeol sighed, he knew you were having a hard time but you never fail to warm his heart with your sweet note, he particularly loved the use of his favourite iron-man quote.
He stared at the note lovingly for a while before heading to the bathroom and freshened up for the day. When he entered the kitchen to see a packed lunch box and another one with breakfast inside, he sulked further. Your puppy-like husband misses you and you doing this, made him sappier. He carefully unpacked the meals you prepared, gratefully munching your cooking. He was supposed to meet his members at 10 and so, he drove quickly as he was running late. When he parked his car in front of the company’s building, a text came from Baekhyun.
Notifications
10.08am KST
Baek:
> Yeol?
> the meeting’s canceled
> Junmyeon-hyung said something came up
> and my mom called, she wanted my help :O
> Really sorry for the sudden intrusion! But have a good rest day with Y/N ^^
> Send her my love too!!
Read 10.15am KST
< BYUN BAEKHYUN YOU LITTLE SHIT
< THANKS FOR THE ‘HEADS UP’
< Picture sent
< LOOK WHERE I AM YOU LITTLE SHIT!!!
Sent 10.16am KST
Baek:
> Oh..
> The message didn’t come through 😅 I texted you way before,, must be the reception?
> But you can always have a good time with y/n!!
> I’m so sorry 🥺
Read 10.17am KST
Chanyeol couldn’t be sulkier. His ears literally drooped down as he huffed in annoyance. He didn’t reply back to Baekhyun as he slid the phone back in his pockets. He drove home in silence, even the thought of going back to bed to aid his tiredness didn’t make him feel better. He entered the foyer of the empty apartment and he shuffled inside lazily. You’d probably melt if you see him right now, his shoulder slumped slightly with a goo-goo look on his face. Especially now, with his buffier-form, compared to his pre-debut lanky state is something you’d administer as a cute change as a result of his exercising habits over the years. But it doesn’t matter because you’re not there and alas he came home to a cold, dark, empty apartment with his love nowhere to be seen.
The sky dark, rain still pouring down, much like his mood. The thing about Chanyeol is the fact that he’s a clingy extrovert when it comes to people he loves. You love that about him. He didn’t care about the hectic schedule, it’s the ‘being away from you’ that made everything hard to surpass. That’s why after every schedule abroad, Chanyeol would love going home when he knows his love is waiting for him. There’s nothing better than coming home to a warm apartment with you snuggled on the couch. However, now, he’s the only one on the couch, alone.
He pondered for more than an hour, zoning out, before deciding to stand up and head to the door once again. The silence is deafening, he misses you too much and he had to do something about it.
—
In your studio, coming in your nearly fifth hour of productivity, you’re starting to break down. You were now on the verge of crying while doing your work, it’s the creativity block, you mentally cursed. You’ve been dealing with it lately but having to work in fashion, it’s inevitable and you never really told anyone about it, especially not Chanyeol. You felt that his occupation demanded more of him than yours did to you, you wouldn’t want to burden him with your problems.
“Fuck.”
“Fucking hell!”
“This is so not happening right now…” tears welled as the screen of your precious laptop turned pitch black. You scoffed at the situation with the waterworks falling down your eyes. You were over this.
You slumped near the corners of the room, hugging your knees as you stared at your now dead device, silently crying as your head whirls for other, worse negative possibilities of happening. Numb, is probably the best way to describe your current state after crying your heart out for 30 minutes straight. You end up curling yourself into a ball, hanging your head low in the corners of the room as your mind goes blank.
As you hid yourself in the darkest corners of your office, you failed to notice the jiggling sound of the key, the clacking locks and the noise of the door opening.
“Babeeeee?” the sound traveled from the hallway. Lo and behold, a sulked Chanyeol is here. His mood is still on the low but the idea of meeting you gets him excited like a puppy.
You couldn’t hear him though, your head still in a blocked-state and the room you’re in was the furthest from the hallway.
Chanyeol entered the studio, footsteps tapping against the hardwood flooring. It puzzled him why he didn’t receive an answer back, but knowing your shoes were on the foyer, he knew you were somewhere inside. He set foot to the break room, your coat was on the couch but where were you?
He continued peeking into his recording studio, the nearest space to the break room. The lights were out, signalling him that you’re probably not there. The bathroom and the other rooms were also empty, your office was the only place left. He slowly knocked, hoping to get an answer. To his surprise, nothing. He then gently pushed the door open, just enough for his head to peek inside. Before he could call your name, he heard sniffles from the farthest corner, he could make up your hunched, clearly crying figure and your favourite beige socks too. He exhaled as his worries washed away. Even though his heart ached more than ever, finding you with a meltdown was a relief as he initially thought you passed out or worse.
He didn’t enter the room. He shuffled himself out as quietly as possible to grab his guitar in his recording room. This should do, he thought.
He re-entered your office, walked closer and sat on the floor near you. The cramped space barely fits his long legs.
“Hey,” he greeted you with a hushed voice.
Noticing his voice, you instinctively lift up your head to see your husband, sitting in front of you. In your shocked-state, you forcefully brushed off your tears in embarrassment, your skin will probably turn red later.
“Hey.. No, no, no..” he reached out, wiping your tears, caressing your disheveled hair.
“Gently, yeah, yeah.. You’ll hurt yourself” he continued as he patted the areas under your eyes with his long sleeves.
After you calmed down, you didn’t have the courage to even say anything to the man. Deep down, you were embarrassed to be found in a silly breakdown, even if it was your husband. Besides, you didn’t know what to say to him anyways. While you were overthinking and avoiding eye contact with him, he pulled the guitar behind him and started to play a familiar song,
“It's a beautiful life
난 너의 곁에 있을게
(I'll stay by your side)
It's a beautiful life
너의 뒤에 서 있을게
(I'll stand right behind you)
Beautiful love”
Slowly but surely, your heart warmed up to the sound of his voice and you couldn’t help but stare at your husband. He stopped singing when your eyes met and he gave you a comforting smile.
“C’mon, let’s get you up princess,” as he helped you stand up, circling his arms around your waist. You haven’t articulated a sound but he didn’t mind, he just let you lean into his sides as he guided you to the couch in the break room. He sat you down before abruptly standing and rummaging a brown paper bag on the coffee table,
“I got your favourite cake and hot chocolate actually,” he grinned, facing your puffy face. “I thought you were having a hard time, well- I know you are having a hard time… But you never tell me you know, Babe?” He rambled as he unboxed a variety of sliced cakes and pastries on the table.
“I-I get the fact that you wouldn’t want to burden me, but I’m kinda your husband and best friend too.. I wish you wouldn’t keep these things from me” he picked up the fork and scooped a piece of cheesecake to feed you,
Before you had the chance to reply,
“I mean—open up a lil’ baby— I don’t mind you working and all, it’s your passion and I will support you either way, but you don’t get to shield your meltdowns from me… Who’s gonna hold you when you cry, huh?” he kept on chattering while feeding you, giving you no room to talk.
“I’ve said a thousand times that we’re super comfortable right now, yet I know it’s not about the money, I’m super cool with you working.. It’s about the workload a-and the pressure you get from your subs and colleagues!!” He raised his arms as a sign of annoyance.
You gulped down the big chunk of cheesecake and shut him up with a peck. The action took him by surprise but it didn’t fail to shut him up.
“Okay, Chanyeol.” you softly replied, followed by another peck on his lips
“I get what you mean” you smiled at your husband.
You then began on telling the troubles you had at work, silently thanking the universe that he came in the right moment and that he was your saving grace. He listened intently, even going to the measures of contacting his technician friends to help fix your laptop as soon as possible. He made jokes too along the way to lighten your mood and gave you warm touches here and there to comfort you further.
You were his home, his ground zero.
He was yours too.
—
Hours passed and now you were back working, Chanyeol in the other room, busying himself in the recording studio.
“Yeol?” you called him.
“Hmm? What’s up princess?”
“Uh- I just remembered, didn’t you had like- plans? You were supposed to go with Baek and the members today right?”
Footsteps were apparent as he walked closer to the opened door of your office, his head peeped through the door.
“Junmyeon-Hyung canceled, Baek too.. I was quite grumpy because I reached the office when Baekhyun texted me” He walked in further.
“Then I came home but the house wasn’t warm enough even though I cranked the heater up!” He sulked, and sulked further.
“I was alone, I don’t want to be…I also don't want you to be alone too Y/N.
I only wanted to be around you, I really tried staying in!! But I couldn’t be alone in the house without you when you’re my home.” he pouted.
You want to die then and there, you miss him as much and he was sad, it makes you sad too, but he was being sulky-cute… Can you turn into a putty of love?
“Come here you big baby!” you excitedly threw yourself in his arms. He buried his soft locks on the crook of your neck as he whispered ‘I miss you' s and you couldn’t help but let out a hearty laugh.
“I miss you too, Yeol..
I miss you so, so much.” He hugged you tighter as he giggled too.
This was it, you thought. This was love at its finest and you couldn’t be happier that you’ve found it. For all the moments, good or bad, both of you never failed to become each other's home.
#Chanyeol#ParkChanyeol#chanyeol fic#chanyeol scenario#chanyeol x reader#chanyeol x you#chanyeol fanfic#chanyeol angst#chanyeol fluff#chanyeol imagine#chanyeol x yn#exo imagines#exo fanfic#exo oneshot#exo angst#exo fluff#comfort fic#park chanyeol fluff#pcy x yn#pcy x reader#exo scenarios#exo pcy#pcy fluff#pcy angst#exo#exo fic#exo fic rec
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Okay! 💓Could you write something about married couple and s/o wants a baby so bad. But baekhyun is not ready or confused idk. He doesn't want it for now. Reader is really disappointed and sad. She loves babies so much and can't wait have one. But baekhyun's reaction (angry or annoying) is made her angry/sad. A big fight but a happy end please. 🥺🥺 (maybe some tears too)
If it is not okay for you then no problem! 🌼
Thank you 💓
Hope you like this, anon 💖
Pairing: Byun Baekhyun x Reader
Word Count: 1.7k
Genre: Angst and Fluff
Warnings: None that I can think of
The evening had been lovely. You and your husband, Baekhyun, had spent it strolling through the tree lined park near your home. It was verging on autumn and there was a slight chill in the air, but the full cold of fall hadn’t hit yet. The sun had almost completely set but it wasn’t fully dark yet. You two were holding hands and chatting about how your days had been.
You were recently unemployed, having left your job as a nurse due to increasing stress and anxiety. Currently, you were playing full time homemaker so that meant you were home alone all day while Baekhyun was at work at a consultancy firm. The days were long but fulfilling. You tried your best to keep yourself occupied, trying new recipes, as well as arts and crafts, reading and writing and regular exercise. The break was nice and it had you contemplating what you really wanted to do with your life, where your true priorities lay.
“Actually, I wanted to talk to you about something,” you said. Baekhyun had just finished telling you about a new project he was taking on at work, and all the responsibilities that were going to come along with it. He loved his job but you knew how demanding it could be, keeping him at the office for long hours. Thankfully he was paid generously for his hard work.
“What is it?” He looked at you and squeezed your hand a little.
“Well, I was thinking since I’m home now and we’re settled, it might be the perfect time to start trying for a baby. We finally have the time and space for it.”
Baekhyun snorted. “Right. Very funny.”
He kept on walking beside you. You didn’t know what you expected his reaction to be but it certainly wasn’t that. Why would he think you were joking about something like this? “I’m being serious, Baek. Let’s start a family.”
Baekhyun said nothing for a few moments and you waited in tense silence, listening to the gravel crunching under your shoes. This conversation was already not going the way you had anticipated.
“YN, babe, I’ve just spent the last ten minutes telling you about the new client and how I’m project leader and all the extra hours of work I’m going to be taking on and you come back with this?”
“I’m not saying it’s going to be easy. And I know how hard you’re working and I appreciate it so much, especially now. But this is important too.”
Baekhyun scoffed and you felt hurt. “It’s out of the question,” he said, his tone one of finality.
“What? We can’t even talk about it?”
“There’s nothing to talk about. There’s no way we can have a baby right now.” He was dismissing you and you felt enraged all of a sudden.
You pulled your hand out of his. “Why are you being so cold?” You had to work to keep your voice even. You weren’t trying to make a scene, there were couples, families, children milling about the place enjoying the evening and you didn’t need to be the story they talked about as they got home.
“I’m not doing this here,” he said, testily.
Annoyed, you began walking ahead of him, back towards the home you shared. You arrived and Baekhyun followed soon after, a look of irritation on his face. “You’re being childish leaving me behind like that.”
“I’m childish? You won’t even talk to me!”
“I told you what I thought.”
“No, you made a decision for the both of us and then acted like I was the unreasonable one for having an issue with that. Do you not want to have kids with me?”
“All I said was not now,” he said, his teeth gritted. He was angry, a rare sight, and seeing him angry only made you more angry.
“What do you mean, not now? We’re both in our thirties, Baek! It’s not like we’re in our early twenties anymore with all the time in the world to wait. It only gets harder the older you get.”
“So what? If it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t happen,” Baekhyun shot back and your jaw dropped.
“Are you fucking kidding me right now? I’ve always said I’ve wanted kids. You know this. You said you wanted them too when we got married. And now this? What the fuck, Baekhyun?”
“Don’t you get it, YN? I have enough going on right now as it is. Work is insane, I’m having to work longer and longer hours, take on all these new responsibilities. You quit your job so I have to keep everything afloat financially all by myself. And now you want this?”
Your eyes widened, tears filling them at his words. It felt like he’d slapped you. He’d never made you feel guilty for not working. When you left your job, Baekhyun had been nothing but kind and supportive, telling you that he had everything handled and that you should take your time to decide when and even if you wanted to return to work, that you had nothing to worry about.
The hurt on your face made Baekhyun soften. He tried to walk back his statement, “I didn’t mean it like that… I just meant-”
“Forget it. Just forget I said anything. I’m going to bed,” you said, your voice even. You turned to and began walking down the hallway. You heard your husband calling for your attention but you ignored him. After you had washed up, you got in bed and began to cry silent tears alone. How had it all gone so wrong?
Baekhyun entered the bedroom about an hour later. You closed your eyes as he came in, pretending to be asleep on your tear soaked pillowcase. You were in no mood to talk to him right now.
“YN,” you heard him say from behind you. You pretended you didn’t hear him, staying as still as you could, hoping he would think you were asleep and leave you alone. No such luck. When Baekhyun wanted to talk, he was relentless about it.
“YN, come on…” he said, approaching you from behind. “I know you’re not asleep.” He put his hand on your shoulder and jiggled you lightly.
You turned onto your back and looked up at him with swollen eyes and lips. It was clear that you had been crying this whole time and that broke his heart. He hated seeing you cry more than anything.
“Baby, don’t cry,” Baekhyun said softly. He produced a bouquet of sad looking carnations from behind his back and held it out to you. “Sorry, I know they’re not great but I got them at the gas station. They’re all I could get at this time of night.”
You sat up against the headboard of your bed and said nothing, but you took the bouquet in your hand, fingering the petals of the flowers.
Baekhyun sat down beside you facing you. “I want to apologize for what I said earlier. I never meant to make it sound like I blame you for any stress I’m feeling. And I love having you not work to be honest. I love the fact that you’re always there when I come home, that we get to spend so much more time together.”
You put the flowers down beside you and took his hand in yours. “I appreciate that.” You gave him a sad smile. It obviously didn’t heal your heart but you appreciated his effort in trying to comfort you. Baekhyun was the only man you’d ever been with who actually gave a shit if you cried.
“I’m sorry too. I know you’ve been under a lot of pressure at work and you’ve been so amazing and patient with me. I should’ve brought it up at another time.”
“No. The thing is… you’re actually right. It is something we should be talking about. We’re not getting younger. I just…” He trailed off.
You leaned forward and put a hand on his cheek, stroking it gently. “Talk to me, baby.”
“I’m scared shitless. The idea of being a father fucking terrifies me. Being responsible for a human life. Making sure he or she grows up and is healthy and happy and all the good things. How the fuck am I supposed to do that? What if I fuck it all up?”
You almost giggled but you held it back. You definitely didn’t want to demean Baekhyun’s feelings but the fact that he even thought for a second he might not be a good father was just so ludicrous. He was the most kind and loving person you’d ever met. Any child would be lucky to have him as a father.
“Baekhyun… It’s normal to be scared about being a parent. I am too. But we can’t let it paralyze us.”
Baekhyun sighed, “I know but… It’s a life, you know? It’s forever. It’s not something we can try out for a few months and then decide to get rid of it if we don’t want it.”
“You’re right. But like… I think it’s one of those things where you just have to dive right in. Delaying this forever isn’t going to help.”
He looked up at you with his Bambi eyes and you looked back at him. He looked so young and sweet faced, he definitely didn’t look like a man in his thirties. But he looked tired. Maybe you’d been too preoccupied with what you wanted that you hadn’t realised sometimes he needed you to build up his confidence the way he always did yours.
“Baekhyun, you’re going to be the most amazing father. I’m sure of it. You’re so filled with love and so patient and smart and gentle. Not to mention your child-like spirit.”
He laughed at that, and you smiled.
“Besides, we’re going to be doing it together. It’s a team effort. We can lean on each other like we always do.”
Baekhyun leaned forward and kissed you on the lips. “I like the sound of that.” He pulled you closer to him and wrapped his arms around you. The warmth of his body was so comforting and you leaned into him, breathing in his familiar scent. ��So, we’re really going to have a baby, hmm?” He said, softly.
“I mean, we’re going to try.”
“Trying sounds fun. Let’s try right now,” Baekhyun said, kissing you again.
#exo#baekhyun#baekhyun x reader#byun baekhyun#exo baekhyun#exo reactions#exo scenarios#exo fluff#exo angst#exo fanfic#baekhyun fanfic
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Hello:) can i request one where the reader finds out she’s pregnant before Sehun’s enlistment? And she’s scared but his reaction is really cute and happy ♥️
an: once again work has been killing me sorry for the late response.
Best Time
I hope Sehun will be seen off well for his enlistment. I can't wait for him to come back. We will miss him <3
warnings: none
genre: fluff and angst
The first snow of December fell past your windows as the world around you froze while your eyes stared at the positive pregnancy test in your hands. What you have been praying wasn't true was unfolding right before your eyes. There couldn't have a worser time for this to happen to you.
A couple weeks before, you had begun feeling a bit unwell. Starting with a couple of headaches and fatigue. This of course progressed to feelings of nausea. With the winter coming, you passed this off as the flu. That was until you had missed your cycle. Well it just so happened that after putting off the test for weeks, you finally decided to take it the day Sehun found it appropriate to announce his enlistment. You felt the anxiety rush through your body as you stared at the two bright red lines. The silence engulfed you as your hands began to shake with fear. Doubt immediately started to take over your mind as the thought that Sehun would be upset and not present for the child came over you. After what felt like an eternity, you were finally able to snap out of your trance and decided to hide the test in the back of the medicine cabinet. Allowing one big event at a time.
A couple days go by and Sehun becomes increasingly concerned with your behavior. The constant stress whenever he starts a sentence with "Babe, Can I ask you a question?" showing through your demeanor. The constant pressure of having to mask your symptoms just to ease the burden of his enlistment. In truth, you were not only scared of this situation interrupting Sehun's wish for an easy dismissal but how this would impact the child. You wanted to tell him the news but no moment felt right. You constantly felt like a burden to his plan.
You managed to keep this secret for 3 days before Sehun came to confront you about this new behavior.
"Hey, is everything alright? You just seem very antsy recently.. Is it about the whole military thing?" He asked as he sat next to you on the sofa, genuine sincerity veiling his face.
"Oh yeah, it's just a big change from what I am used to." you spat out to quickly change topic.
"You know, I'm not going to be gone that long, my position is special. The whole social service thing is different." He responds before placing a soft hand on your back. This action causing for a strong emotion to arise.
"Im sorry.." you mumbled looking down in your lap, tears beginning to swell in your eyes. This left Sehun staring at you with a tilted head.
"For what? Already missing this handsome face? That's a given.." He rolls his eyes as a playful smile appears on his face.
"No.. keeping this secret from you." You mutter while wiping the tears from your eyes and chuckling softly at his joke. He watched as you stood up and headed to the bathroom to get the test. When you returned, you slowly placed the positive test in his hand and sat back anxiously and studied his face.
"Oh my god.." He mumbled as he stared at the test, causing for you to feel sick to your stomach in fear. You quickly jumped to explain yourself.
"Im sorry for keeping this from you. I know its a terrible time to bring this up and I know it ruins the whole enlistment process but I hope you aren't mad about this.. I wanted to tell you but there was no right time for this. I just couldn't bring myself to-" You rambled until you heard Sehun's voice interrupt you.
"Oh my god!" His eyes jolted to meet with your own. "I'm going to be a father!" His eyes jumped between yours and your stomach as his excitement rushed out.
"So you aren't mad about the timing...?" You muttered, taking time to adapt to his reaction.
"Mad? This is the best timing possible! I'm on the base for like a week then home for 2 years with no active promotions. I'm free to bother you and the baby every day!" He says, grabbing your wrists and shaking them with utter joy. "Like I don't think you understand... I'm going to be a father!" He shouts before flashing you a bright smile. You chuckle in response as you watch him express every ounce of joy in his body.
"Oh my god... I have to call and tell Jongdae that i'm a better father than him!" He yells before placing a lot of wet kisses on your face, making sure to place some on your stomach as well.
He jumps up and skips to the bedroom just to share his announcement as a way to prove his greatness. You felt like 20 lbs had been lifted off of your chest as his reaction proved to be the opposite of what you expected. This time as you sat with the pregnancy test, you were filled with delight instead of pure frustration and panic. These next two years were going to be filled with bliss as long as Sehun was by your side.
From the sofa you heard the sounds of Sehun boasting about his fathering excellence, which only made you so much more confident and excited for the future of this small family.
#exo#exo writing#exo x reader#exo fanfic#exo fluff#exo sehun#exo angst#exo drabble#exo k#exo scenarios#request#lo reqs#oh sehun#sehun x reader#sehun x you#sehun imagine#sehun#sehun fanfic#sehunnie
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╰☆╮ᵔᴗᵔ ╰☆╮
➜ ∥ ☆ ATEEZ M.list ∥
➜ ∥ ❃ EXO M.list ∥
➜ ∥ △ SEVENTEEN M.list ∥
➜ ❀ 𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 @cromernet & @caratwritersclub
➜ ❀ 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐝 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐲 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭, 𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐮𝐭 ^^
➜ ❀ 𝐛𝐮𝐲 𝐦𝐞 𝐚 𝐤𝐨-𝐟𝐢 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐢𝐭
➜ ❀ 𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐚 𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐞
➜ ❀ 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐀𝐎𝟑, 𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐦, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐓𝐢𝐤𝐓𝐨𝐤 <𝟑
↳ 𝐈 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐀𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐳-𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐬 𝐭𝐨𝐨
©️bvidzsoo. Do not steal, plagiarize, translate, repost or use my works in any form.
૪ All works were written by me. They are pure fiction, and they do not depict the real characters of mentioned members.
#bvidzsoo#ateez#exo#seventeen#ateez x reader#exo x reader#seventeen x reader#ateez angst#ateez smut#ateez fluff#exo angst#exo smut#exo fluff#seventeen angst#seventeen smut#seventeen fluff#kpop#ateez oneshot#ateez scenarios#ateez imagines#exo oneshot#exo scenarios#exo imagines#seventeen oneshot#seventeen scenarios#seventeen imagines
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Idol Spotlight | Byun Baekhyun
🌻 - Fluff ☔️ - Angst 💋 - Smut
1. Pop Rocks, Strawberry, Bubblegum Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 🌻
Summary: You meet cute single dad Baekhyun at the candy shop where you work. Sparks fly, and you realise that your life is about to get a lot sweeter.
Genre: Single Dad AU
2. Come Back to Bed 💋
Summary: After cheating breaks your marriage apart, your therapist instructs you to share a bed with Baekhyun. There’s no trust… but there sure is lust.
Genre: Husband!Baekhyun, angst, smut, bed sharing
3. Get You Alone 💋
Summary: The doctor clears you for sex after having a baby. Baekhyun can’t wait to get started - but you’re having second thoughts.
Genre: Husband!Baekhyun, New Parents
4. Baby Daddy 🌻
Summary: You’re really nervous about telling your idol boyfriend Baekhyun that you’re pregnant. So, you decide to get creative. Only, things don’t go the way you expect…
Genre: Fluff
+ MAIN MASTERLIST+
#baekhyun#exo#byun baekhyun#exo smut#baekhyun smut#baekhyun fluff#baekhyun angst#exo fluff#exo angst#exo imagines#kpop fluff#kpop smut#kpop imagines#exo x reader#exo fanfiction#superm#exo reactions#exo drabbles#exo fics#kai
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Prey ✧ b.bh
Pairing: Vampire!Baekhyun x human!(gn)reader
Genre: angst - ?
Summary: Baekhyun found himself a very willing prey, so why would he hold back?
Word count: 2.1k
Warning: blood, biting, mentions of death
A/N: this is not what i wanted to write today, and it's not what i wanted to write when i started writing it and it's much longer and i blame exactly one (1) person for this thing bcs they infected me with vampire thirst and their stupid meme was the last drop </3
“Oh you wanna kiss me so bad,” you purr against his ear. You’re already breathing heavily, your heart beating in your chest at a frenzied pace. You pull at his hair, fingers tangling into the mess just so you feel something real in your grasp. If you don’t do something, you’ll lose your mind. Your body’s screaming at you to move, to run, but you can’t when there’s a beast pinning you to the wall.
There’s no way to ease the rush, or to persuade your body you’re not dying tonight - perhaps. If you’ll behave. Truth to be told, you wouldn’t want to run or feel safe even if you could. It’s too addictive, the feeling of blood rushing through your veins, your heart thumping like a rabbit’s caught in a hawk’s claws.
Baekhyun can hear it, he can smell it, as his little prey trembles in his hold in nothing but excitement that is not shared by your instincts. It makes his own so strong the world fades away as hunger takes over. You’re such a good prey. So afraid and so eager you all but put yourself into his lap, let him back you into a corner and he’s sure you’ll let him eat you up without fussing too. He can tell all warmth drains from your fingertips as his fans scratch up the column of your neck. His sharp senses only follow your blood - its warmth, its iron-y scent, the flow of it through your body. The artery right beneath his teeth is threatening to burst, so juicy and so full his body almost does something so human like salivating.
“Kissing you is the last thing I wanna do,” he finally responds but his tongue feels heavy and he drags it right over your pulse point, his body jolting in pleasure. You moan though your lips are pressed tightly together and it sounds almost as sweet as your heartbeat. The pain as you pull harder on his hair is sweeter. It’s so cute how desperately your mind is trying to anchor itself and brace itself against the terror of what it thinks is approaching death. Fortunately for you, Baekhyun likes to deny himself the pleasure as much as he likes to indulge, and he lets you pull his head away from your neck.
He responds to your desperate kisses lazily. His hands stroke up and down your sides, already caressing the bare skin under your shirt. You’re so full of life. He wants to take a little for himself. Yet you’re so greedy - hands grabbing at his collar, pulling him closer, clawing at him to rile him up or maybe in a poor and unwilling attempt at self-defense. Your teeth pulling on his lip and your sultry gaze are the last drop.
You gasp when he slams you against the wall, his body truly pinning you against the surface and his nails turning into claws that dig into your skin until it barely doesn’t break. It’s hard to breathe with the pressure of his body on yours. Your excitement grows and your fear spikes, but that’s alright. You can feel his excitement too. His pupils are blown wide and boring into yours. It’s an action guided purely by nature that you try to avoid the predatory gaze even as his breath mixes with yours and there’s nowhere else to look but the beast.
“Afraid yet, little human?” he whispers softly. It’s quiet enough that you can imagine he sounds concerned. Your mouth is too dry to speak, your throat too constricted and he’s not even choking you. His teeth, glistening in the moonlight coming in through the window, are still far from your flesh and blood. Your hands fall to hang limply by your body, the energy to fight leaves you and flight is not an option, yet your body is stuck in survival mode, helpless and shaking, and your eyes are getting teary. You’re such a good prey for him. “Will you beg for it?”
You take in a shaky breath but you can’t speak. Your mind blanks out when he dips his head and kisses the corner of your lips. Your jaw is next, he makes a tender path to where it meets your neck. He hovers without touching you, and you squirm against his body, the last spasms of a dying victim that are fruitless and only rouse the predator’s drive.
Your life flashes before your eyes. Shards of memories long forgotten - the same paralysis taking hold of your body the first time you heard a tiger’s roar, the same submission forced by instinct when you were forced into a corner with no means of standing up for yourself, and the state of being hyper aware of the blood rushing through your body when you met his hungry gaze for the first time.
His fangs are sharp enough that the pain comes later than the actual bite. You feel it like a blade slicing through the skin on your shoulder. He’s playing with you, and the tears pool in your eyes to the brim. You hear a gasp and realize that it’s you making the sound. Your muscles are drawn taut with tension, and it makes the next incision easy for him. Hissing, you feel the drops of blood dotting your skin. You’re more than familiar with his games, you know the cuts will heal quickly, leaving only faint scars behind. He’s just playing with his food until he’s not.
It’s different today. He’s impatient. You feel it in the way his claws already break skin and blood rises to the surface. Those won’t bleed much, merely leaving behind a bloody crust on his claws and uncomfortable little scratches that you’ll feel on your ribs every time you lay on your side.
Meanwhile his teeth nibble on the flesh of your neck and where he nibbles, he devours. You whimper, your hands curl into fist and your nails dig into your palm. You can’t do anything but let the pain wash over you. It’s only a little bite. Nothing more than an appetizer. Just a bit of flesh you don’t need and your body won’t miss. More blood than flesh, juicy and so fun to chew that it makes him shiver in excitement before he attacks your neck again. He’s just scraping you with his teeth a bit. Where’s the harm in that? It surely doesn’t hurt that much. Flesh won’t satisfy him, it won’t sooth the thirst clawing at his throat, but the pulpy addition to the liquid he needs is kind of fun.
The vibrations of Bakehyun’s satisfied hums and purrs tickle through your frozen state. The tears have long spilled and you’re biting your lip hard to stop yourself from crying out. Your neck is sensitive and tender from only just healing from your last encounter with the vampire. You won’t stand it for long, seeing as your hand already sought out his arms to grip onto. You close your eyes tight and try to get control of your breathing. You want to feel all of it. You don’t want to escape. Resisting instinct feels like overcoming death and you’re addicted to the high that follows.
He could shred your throat to pieces with his fangs alone but he’s just toying with you, leaving pretty little bloody lines that tempt him. His lips are bloody, his cheeks and chin and nose. He’s always been a messy eater when allowed to indulge. His throat burns, the void where his stomach used to be threatens to swallow him from the inside unless he quenches the thirst.
And then it comes.
“Please,” a faint plea, a cry, a sniffle from a pathetic little human that is offering a body much weaker than his own for him to use as he pleases, “Please drink from me.”
He feels your flesh splinter like wood when he bites where he littered your throat with his precise little bites and cuts and his eyes roll back as fresh blood fills his mouth. Distantly, he hears you scream so he presses himself firmer against you so you can’t breathe. He feels your blood drip in thick drops from his chin and down his neck. The metallic taste fills his soul with peace and soothes his aches. The iron tastes just like salvation. He keeps sucking out more of your blood and gulps it down eagerly. He can hear your heart beating, desperately trying to make for the lack of liquid it’s supposed to provide to your oxygen-starved body. He can feel you struggling, whimpering so weakly a human could not notice the sound.
He’s starving, famished, despite feeding not too long ago. Just a little taste and now he can’t get enough. You knew what you were getting into when you invited him to your home. Stretching, baring your neck for him to see. You wanted to get eaten. This once the blame is all yours. He licks the bites only to sink his teeth in again, to draw more pained sounds that soon die in your throat. He should let you go. He’s had enough to live without thirst. Now it’s just a decadent feast. Your thick blood pours down his throat and it’s a caress of angel’s wings. Just him and his good prey and the delicious blood. A heaven he has to let go.
Not yet, the vampire thinks as he licks his lips and the wound he left behind, he still needs more. He bites down again, lower, but close enough to let his teeth sink through the cracks in your flesh he made. You can’t scream anymore, choking on nothing as you try to breathe hopelessly, your body so weak as to be almost lifeless. It feels like your strength flows directly into him where his powers amplify it just to cause you more harm. The last of your tears spill from your eyes, and when you can no longer hold onto life and the world around you and your mind starts shutting down, you feel him lap at your neck.
The coagulated blood creates bumps that are a funny texture under his tongue, but that’s what he gets for getting carried away. You’re barely conscious - perhaps barely alive? He thinks for a moment, but your heart beats on, determined to make up for its failure to keep your body strong that is not its own fault. Still, you’re weak and fragile, and Baekhyun is grateful for how good a prey you were, and so he holds you still with all the tenderness he can muster when he’s at his strongest. He finishes his work with a kiss, and he hopes you felt it before you collapsed.
He should leave soon, before the dawn comes. You must be used to being left on the spot his kind fed from you. But seeing how pale you’ve become, and sucking the residue of your blood off his teeth, he’s overcome by genuine fondness. He sighs, collecting you in his arms. He carries you to bed and sets you down gently, cocooning you in blankets because he knows your body will struggle to produce warmth. He brings you water and some food, though he isn’t entirely sure if it’s ready to eat. Oh how simple his life is in regards to feeding.
His thirst satisfied and a favor done, he really needs to leave. You didn’t ask him to stay, nobody ever does. He doesn’t like to feel unwelcome, though he has a feeling that should you wake up with him in your bed, you wouldn’t entirely mind. He checks the sky outside. It’s still dark, but his body tells him he needs to get a move on to return to his own home safely. But then he hears your teeth chatter with cold, he sees you shiver even as you’re wrapped in all the warm and fluffy blankets he could find.
You were the perfect prey for him.
He should reward you after he took what he desired.
It feels like he’s disconnected from his body as he slips under the covers and maneuvers you to his chest. He knows he’s almost as warm as a human should be right after feeding, but he isn’t prepared to feel how cold you really are when you curl into him. Baekhyun sighs and pets your head. He doesn’t need sleep, his body won’t allow it either, but this sensation isn’t all that bad. He’ll allow himself to analyze it while you rest.
Soon he’ll seek out a new human to feed on, but tonight he’s happy to see his prey live on.
#exo scenarios#exo imagines#exo fics#exo x reader#baekhyun scenarios#baekhyun imagines#baekhyun x reader#baekhyun angst#exo angst
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new thing (pt. 6) • pcy
pairing: chanyeol x f!reader, age gap, established relationship
synopsis: your break with chanyeol lasts longer than expected and you try to make something work.
genre: heavy angst, smut 18+ MINORS DNI!!! bit of fluff
warnings: SMUT 18+ MINORS DNI!!! lots of angst and unspoken feelings, swearing, pwp (kinda) p in v, mentions of alcohol and drinking and being drunk
a/n: bruh yall inspired me to writeeee so here you go! i love reading all of your messages omg they’re so funny and sweet! i hope you like this 🩷 thanks for all of the support
a ‘little while’ turns into 2 weeks. the school year begins within those 14 days, and you throw yourself into your courses, occupying your time with 1 credit classes so you don’t have time to think about anything other than graduating and your education. when you do have a moment to yourself and to think, you force yourself to think of everything but chanyeol. it’s hard, since nearly everything reminds you of him. you’ve thought about texting him but resisted, chickening out at the last second.
it’s a friday night and you have no set plans. seulgi is going out with her boyfriend, so you have the house to yourself and a movie queued up on your laptop. ideally, you’d have someone to spend this quiet friday night in with, but alas. you’ve been single before; you’ll survive a movie night alone.
looking through your cabinets, you sigh at the lack of snack options, and things you want to eat. it’s been awhile since you’ve been shopping, having gotten used to being around somebody who constantly cooked for you, or took you out to eat. it’s the little things about not being with chanyeol that you feel like you took for granted. in this case, it’s grocery shopping.
grabbing your keys and purse, you throw on a sweatshirt before heading out of your apartment and down to your car. you hop in and make the short drive down to the corner store.
a quick glance around the parking lot would’ve told you to stay in your car, but it slips your mind as you’re here for a snack run, not expecting to be here long.
you beeline for the chip aisle, grabbing a bag of chips for yourself and another bag for seulgi. you stay there for a second, scanning a few other options before feeling satisfied and going to the coolers. there, you grab an iced tea and a water before getting ready to close the door, but a voice makes you freeze and stiffen, the door stuck mid-swing in your palm.
“bro, stop fucking around,” you know that voice better than you know your own. you’ve dreamt about it constantly, wishing for it to call on you, to say sweet things to you, like it used to. but now, it’s not yours to even want in that way.
slamming the cooler door, you quickly spin on your heel, racing down the aisle, not paying attention to where you’re going, but knowing that you need to get out. but you slam into a hard body, nearly knocking you backwards. “holy shit!” the man says, quickly turning around and reaching out an arm to steady you. “are you okay?” he asks.
footsteps round the corner, curses flowing from the mouth that belongs to the one you want more than anything, more than these snacks in your arms. “what the fuck did you do now? sorry for my cousin, he’s an id-“ his voice cuts off when he gets closer, stopping a few feet behind jongin. you raise your head, your eyes zeroing in on chanyeol.
“it was my fault,” you mean to say it to jongin, to apologize for not paying attention, but you can’t rip your eyes away from chanyeol. but now you’re apologizing to, technically the wrong person, but they both deserve two different types of apologies. “i wasn’t thinking.” you say, wondering if he can read between the lines and take it as an apology for the end of your relationship.
“he’s an idiot,” chanyeol says, making jongin scoff. there’s that glimmer in his eyes, the one that doesn’t fail to make you smile every time, but now you hold it back. you almost forget jongins there, until he mutters that he’s going to leave you and chanyeol alone.
there’s an awkward silence before chanyeol takes a single step closer to you. “hey,” he says, offering you a small smile. your heart hammers wildly in your chest, feeling like it’s going to crack through your bones and beat right out of your chest. “how’ve you been?” he asks, his voice softer than usual.
“fine. and you?” it’s like making small talk with somebody in an elevator; it’s terrible. you want to scream and run out of here, but you’re rooted to the floor and don’t trust your legs. you wonder if he can see your trembling hands, or if the snacks in them are doing enough to obscure their shaking.
“i’m good!” he says, and he sounds like he means it. it breaks your heart again, because there’s been countless nights where you’ve lain awake with thoughts of him running through your mind. you’re not even to being ‘good’, barely surpassing being ‘fine’.
you mumble a ‘that’s good’, and he says he’s going to go find jongin. “it was nice seeing you, y/n,” and you could call to your knees in tears, because it’s the first time he’s said your name in 14 days and you miss how it sounds coming from him.
“you too,” you squeak. he glances down at your arms full of snacks and gives you a small smile. you’re about to return it until you glance down at his hands, and feel your blood run cold.
chanyeol follows your line of sight to his hands and tries to indiscreetly hide the box of condoms, but you’ve already seen them. he can feel his neck heating up and feels the need to explain himself, that no, he has no intentions of using them soon, but the words don’t find him. your throat burns and your eyes sting, but you manage to not any tears fall, or let your voice give way to what’s happening inside of you when you say, “i’m gonna go,” and speed walk away on shaky legs.
luckily for you, there’s nobody in line at the check. you throw your stuff down on the counter and glance over your shoulder to make sure you don’t see either chanyeol or jongin. you pay as quickly as you got in line, thank the cashier and grab your bag of stuff.
chanyeol and jongin are walking towards the checkout as you’re taking your stuff, and you practically sprint out with how fast you walk and the strides you take.
outside, your eyes come in direct contact with his black corvette and you scream internally, wondering how you missed it when it’s right there, practically in front of the doors and not too far from you own car.
you feel like some sick joke is being played on you, and you throw your stuff into the backseat before speeding out of the parking lot and down the road. you drive half a mile before your eyes start to well up with tears, and drive another 500 kilometers before turning on a random street and pulling over to bawl into your hands.
you allow yourself to let go, to let nasty, ugly sobs from feo within your chest escape. you shake against the steering wheel, wishing you never went out for food you have no appetite for anymore, so that you could avoid seeing him. by the looks of it, he’s truly no longer yours because the two of you rarely, if ever, used condoms. there’s somebody else who’s going to get to experience him in ways that you long for.
when you get back to your apartment, you forego your movie plans and instead text some friends and ask if they’re busy. they tell you they are, that they’re going out (like most people you know), and ask if you want to come. you don’t hesitate to say ‘yes’, and start getting ready. chanyeol isn’t going to ruin your night, and you’re not going to sit here and mope and be single.
nearly two hours later, you’re ready and your friends wait for you downstairs. you wear the littlest black dress you own, one that barely covers your ass and is backless. it’s cowl neck is low, showing a good amount of cleavage, and your heels are high. you don’t intend to go home with somebody, but you plan to get attention in whatever way it comes.
shortly after you get to the club, drinks are practically thrown your way. decent enough men buy you drinks, and in return get a bit of your conversation before you always dismiss yourself to your friends. every time a man comes up to you, you make a mental list of every way he is not chanyeol, comparing everything down to their finger nails. of course, no man is going to compare to him, at least for now, so you drink until you start to forget what he looks like with your eyes closed.
you do cut yourself off, though, not wanting to vomit all over everything and everybody in this club. you take a seat in your section and go on your phone, checking your instagram to see all the photos and videos you’ve been tagged in tonight. you repost all of them to you stories, smiling as you type out silly captions for all of them.
one of your friends comes over to you, drunk and slurring as she tells you to come dance. you abandon your phone and get into the circle with your friends, dancing sensually with whatever the DJ decides to play.
by the time you call it quits for the night, you’ve sobered up enough to make it safely into your apartment. you stumble down the hallway to your bedroom as quietly as you can walking in heels on wood floors, and fall onto your bed. you lie there for a moment before you remember to wake yourself up and at least take your shoes off so you can go to bed.
plugging your phone into the charger, you look at your screen and see you have an instagram dm from chanyeol. your stomach flips as you unlock your phone and click on the notification, biting your bottom lip.
he’s replied to a video on your story, one of you dancing. but you’re not dancing alone, you’re dancing on a man, his hands holding onto your hips and lower back as you throw your ass on him. you don’t remember doing this, and the man doesn’t look familiar but it definitely happened.
real_pcy: so this is what we’re doing now?
11:53pm
you: we’re not together.
1:31am
real_pcy: lmao alright.
1:35am
you wake up hours later with a raging headache, a terrible taste in your mouth, and the feeling that you did something bad. you pat the bed next to you to make sure there’s nobody there, and sigh in relief when it’s empty and just pillows.
you can barely remember anything that happened after you got in the uber to the club and before you got into your bed. you remember bits and pieces, but they’re muddled and incomplete.
a frown takes over your features as you try to remember, but nothing solid comes to mind. you glance over at your digital clock that reads 12:12pm, and sigh, sitting up and groaning when your head feels like somebody is stomping on it.
grabbing your phone, you gasp and let it slip out of your grasp. it’s a bad idea to scramble out of bed to get it, but you do anyway and pick it up from the floor. you frantically open it and go to your messages, expecting to see chanyeols name at the top, but you don’t. you frown again as you try to remember where you messaged him, or if you made it up.
an instagram notification pings on your phone like a lightbulb going off in your brain, and you bite the inside of your cheek as you check your dms. again, his account isn’t at the top, and your frown turns into a scowl. “what the fuck?” you mutter. you go to the search tab and type in his username. it pops up, but when you click on it, it says ‘follow’, rather than ‘following’ like it should.
your brain rolls around in your skull as you realize what’s happened, what he’s done. even during your little break, you guys remained mutuals on social media. of course, you never messaged each other, but no blocking transpired. clearly, he made the first move and removed you from his account entirely, making you an outsider.
you decide to do one better, and block him completely. you block him everywhere else, but hesitaste on his number. that’s different, feels more personal. you still want him to have access to you and vice versa, assuming he didn’t block you first.
backing out of his contact, you leave his number untouched and sigh. if you thought it was over before, it truly is now.
fourteen days turns into twenty-six, but you’re not counting. it’s been school, school, school, for you, and if you’re not on campus then you’re most likely asleep, unless it’s the weekend. you find things to occupy your two days off, like doing things with seulgi when she’s not with her boyfriend, or taking yourself out. you’ve been getting your hair done lately, wanting to change something in your control.
you drain the last of your coffee and rinse out the mug in the sink. an unfolded bag of laundry waits to be put away, on the couch, and you saunter over to it and pick it up and take it to your room.
you dump the bag onto your bed and start separating your clothes into piles. you get into a zone until you pick up a tshirt that is far too big and not yours, and purse your lips. you toss it into its own pile and search for the rest of the clothes in the pile that belong to him, which is a lot more than you care to admit.
folding everything neatly, you snap a picture and open your messages with him. your stomach roils at the thought of texting him, your last messages being nearly a month ago, from the night you ruined everything.
you chew on your bottom lip for a while before saying ‘fuck it’ and sending him the picture of his folded clothes and a message.
yn: hey these are yours. can i drop them off later?
chanyeol: yep. i can give you your things too. does 4 work?
yn: yes
chanyeol: see you later
you blow out a breath. you didn’t think he would respond so quickly and be so complying. had it been the other way around, you would’ve hoped he’d ship you your stuff in the mail so you didn’t have to deal with him. but now you have 6 hours to stress about seeing him since that fateful day at the drug store.
and those six hours roll around quickly, so quickly that you’ve changed your outfit twice, unsure of what you should look like when you see him. you decide on jeans and black cropped tshirt, and some sneakers. you figure it’s a regular enough outfit, and stuff his clothes into a tote bag before leaving your room.
“i’ll be back,” you say to seulgi, who sits on the couch, painting her nails. she looks up and waves, her eyes traveling to the full bag in your hands. “dropping off some stuff to chanyeol.” you clarify.
she raises an eyebrow. “you’re dropping off stuff?” she questions. you nod and her eyebrow manages to go up higher. “you sure that’s all?” she says, almost like she can see right through you, and the fact that you put on a matching set underneath your clothes—just in case.
“and i’m picking up my stuff,” you manage, swallowing the lump in your throat.
“do you plan to go inside?” she asks, and you hate this interrogation, but she’s seen you mope for nearly a month over him. you shrug and she sighs, going back to her nails. “just be… careful. i’ll call if i get worried, you know.”
you smile a small smile at her words. “i know. bye,” you leave after that and head down to you car. you take a deep breath before you put the key in the ignition, feeling many things at once. your stomach flips wildly and your hands are clammy at the mere thought of going to his house to see him.
you drive too fast for somebody who is supposedly just going to drop off items to their ex. you really shouldn’t be this… energized at seeing him, since you two didn’t exactly end on good terms. you told him to get out the first time and the second time you solidified that you’re both single. sometimes you wish you could bite your tongue more.
his neighborhood comes into view quickly, and when you hook the left onto his street your heart leaps into your throat. you drive slow down to his house and parallel park you car on the curb in front of his mailbox. this is one of the few times you’ve been here alone to see him, your toyota looking out of place in a neighborhood where the average car owned is a mercedes.
getting out, you grabs the bag of clothes and hold it tightly in your hands, taking ginger steps up his driveway to his door. you suck in a breath when you knock three times, and clutch the bag to your midsection.
the door swings open and you feel your knees buckle when you see chanyeol. mild shock passes on his face like he forgot you were coming over, and then he checks his watch. “hey, sorry i lost track of time,” he says, awkwardly standing in the door way. he looks at you, eyes quickly giving you a once over before they land on the bag in your hands. “shit, let me grab your stuff. do you want to come in?” he asks, already moving out of the way before you have the chance to respond.
your feet take you into his house before your brain can process what’s really happening. “i’ll be right back,” he says, jogging up his stairs while you stay in place in the corridor. you peek your head out to look in the living room to note any major changes and see one. you feel like there may be something different about his kitchen, but he’s already bounding back down the stairs when you think about looking. “here you go.” he says, extending the clothes to you.
you pull open the tote bag and try to grab his clothes, but the bag isn’t wide enough so they fall back in, most of them unfolding. chanyeol takes the bag from you and holds it open so you can grab them easily. it’s not even been 5 minutes, and you’re already embarrassing yourself.
“sorry,” you cringe when you hand him his unfolded clothes before you put your own in the bag.
chanyeol gives you a small, reassuring smile that makes your pulse skyrocket and you avert your eyes. “it’s fine,” he says but it only makes you flush more. “how are you? how’s school?” he asks.
“uh, fine and fine. i’m taking bullshit classes for the credit, so,” you say, shrugging. “you?”
chanyeol shrugs too, a small smile still on his face. “same old stuff; i’m helping kai produce some songs, getting sehun in the studio more now,” he says. you nod awkwardly look around, not really knowing what to say. chanyeol leans against the wall and slots his clothes underneath his armpit and presses it to his side so they don’t fall. “you seeing anybody?” he asks suddenly, making your eyes snap up to him, narrowing immediately.
“is that really any of your business?” you question, defense all in your voice. chanyeol shrugs, as it to say ‘i’m just asking’. “we’re not together.”
“obviously not,” he laughs, but he doesn’t find it funny. it actually makes him mildly sick to be reminded of it, for it to be said out loud by you of all people, because he had every intention of coming back to you until you seemingly called it quits for good. “but i saw that video.” chanyeol adds, his tone more serious.
“and i saw you buying condoms,” you counter, crossing your arms over your chest.
“okay, but you’ve never danced with me like that,” he says, a hint of jealousy in his voice that you are definitely not imagining. you scoff at his words and shake your head.
“we’ve never gone out together, and the one time we happened to be out at the same time, we’d just met and then fucked in your car.”
chanyeol gives you a look that makes your face fall, one that makes you want to ball your hands into fists. he rubs underneath his lip and glances down at his feet. “what?” you ask, daring him to say what’s on his mind.
“nothing,” he says, brushing you off. you stare at him for a moment, waiting for him to look at you but he doesn’t.
“i’m not like that,” you say, frowning.
“i know,” he lifts his eyes to you and your draw your bottom lip in. it’s gets silent again, and you wonder if this is a good moment for you to make your escape, but you don’t really want to.
“are you seeing anybody?”
“no,” his response sounds honest, but you don’t completely believe it because of what you saw.
“i saw you buying condoms, chanyeol,” you say, pressing your lips together. he rolls his eyes and runs a hand through his hair.
“yeah, because i plan to practice safe sex in the future, y/n—whether that’s with you, or with somebody else,” your cheeks flush at his words and a knot forms in your stomach. you don’t know whether to be semi flattered, or gutted knowing that there will be others after you, like there were before you.
“well, we’re not having sex,” you declare, and chanyeol shrugs.
“that’s fine.”
it’s fine, but somehow you end up face-down-ass-up on his bed, his palm pressing on your tailbone to give you a deeper arch as he pounds into you. with every thrust into you, a desperate mewl leaves your mouth.
chanyeol has a right grip on your hips to keep you in place every time you try to run away from him. he yanks you back and tells you to stay with him, to take it because he knows you can, and you’re not used to me anymore? you only cry out his name in response, tears prickling in your eyes.
“fuck,” he spits when his shirt keeps getting in the way of seeing where you to connect, whenever he pushes into to you. his momentum barely falters as he puts the hem in between his teeth to keep the material out of the way. both of you aren’t even fully undressed, that’s how rushed it was; you’re still in your top and thong, the tiny material being pushed aside so he can enter you, and him his tshirt. it’s the first time—other than the night you met—that neither of you are fully bare, and you can’t tell if that’s a sign that he doesn’t deem you worthy of getting undressed, or if it’s a sign that you’re about to start over.
it’s also one of the few times he’s started with doggy first. chanyeol alwyas liked to look at you; always liked you on top of him or under him, but he liked to see your face the most. you don’t know if it’s a slight that he has you turned away from him, or if he just wanted to watch your ass move.
“ch-chanyeol—fuck!” tears stream down your cheeks and you grip the sheets tightly, trying to pull your body away from him but he yanks you back in place. you cry out his name and hate how desperate you sound, like you’ve never been fucked a day in your life. you bury your face into a pillow, but he rips that away from you too.
“wan’ hear you,” he mumbles, continuing to slam into you. you can only curse and clench around him in response, the knot in your stomach getting tighter and tighter as he goes on with his mission to touch your spleen (at least that’s what it feels like).
“g-gonna c-cum,” you hiccup, whining out his name when he snakes an arm around your front and starts flicking on your clit. the stimulation makes you clench your eyes shut and tense around him, gasping before crying out his name as you gush all over him.
you expect him to stop, but he fucks you through it, never stopping his ministrations on your clit. “please, yeol!” you beg, feeling your legs start to shake as another wave of deep pleasure comes over you.
“you can do it, baby,” he grunts, running a hand up your back before gently pressing down on your spine. the pet name makes you whine dramatically and release once again, white liquid running down your thighs.
he finally pulls out when you beg him again, feeling too hot and overstimulated. you crumple onto the bed and roll onto your back, trying to regain your breath. you hear chanyeol shift next to you and then he taps you on the knee. “you alright?” he asks.
“give me a minute,” you croak, licking your dry lips. your body feels like you’re running a fever, and you sit up to pull off your top before flopping back down.
chanyeol gives you a literal minute before tapping you again. “are you gonna be okay?”
“yes, i’m just so fucking hot right now,” you say, blowing air into your face.
“you wanna take a break?” he asks and you crack an eye open to look at him. his shirt is off and his dick is still hard in the condom. you take his comment as a challenge, being that he’s never asked if you’ve needed a break before. maybe he thinks you can’t handle it and have gone soft on him, but you’ll show him otherwise.
“no. come here,” you say with authority. he obliged and crawls on top of you. you pull him down to your mouth and make out with him, hooking a leg over his back. chanyeol kisses down your jaw and to your neck before kissing down through the valley of your breasts. he pulls back and looks down at you, pulling at your bra strap and letting it snap back against you.
“you’re matching,” he comments, glancing down at your underwear. busted.
“so?” you say, reaching for him.
“you said we weren’t having sex,” chanyeol points out, making you let out an exasperated sigh paired with an eye roll. “you wore a thong.”
“i always wear thongs.”
“and we always fuck.”
you roll your eyes again and sit up to take your bra off, tossing it close to his head on purpose. “just shut up and fuck me,” you say, pushing down your underwear. chanyeol pulls it down the rest of the way for you and wastes no more time positioning himself in between your legs.
“y/n,” he groans when he pushes in, tossing his head back. you mouth falls open and you let out s few breathless pants. “shit.” he grunts, looking down at you with furrowed eyebrows. you can only stare up at him with wide eyes, clenching right around him like he didn’t just fuck you so hard you felt like you needed an ice bath to recover.
chanyeol pulls in and out of you slowly, trying to hold back from coming too soon. you can see it in his face, the concentration, and it clicks for you. he can’t handle looking at you while he fucks you because he’ll finish too fast. your sex in the past was never quick, but the effort of restraint he’s putting in is something you haven’t seen.
“y-yeol,” you moan, putting a hand on the back of his neck and pulling him down for a kiss. but he just presses against your lips, his breath fanning your mouth. “faster.” you mumble, tangling a hand in his hair.
he whimpers and pushes himself up on his arms and speeds up just enough to keep himself under control, but you still want more. “more,” you urge, wanting to watch him fall apart because of you, even if you don’t get off before or with him.
“baby,” he groans, squeezing his eyes shut as he gives you what you ask for. your cry out his name and part your legs wider for him. you lift one onto his shoulder and hook it around the nape of his neck to pull him closer to you, a grunt leaving his lips. “y-y/n, im c-close,” he whimpers, holding onto your thigh that rests near his head.
“yeolie, you feel so good,” you manage, grabbing a handful of the sheets. his hips stutter and he lets out a groan before he cums, his muscles flexing.
you almost smile as he falls apart on top of you, especially knowing that it took looking at you to get there faster.
chanyeol pulls out of you and drops down onto the bed next to you. his chest heaves up and down rapidly and you push hair back from his forehead. “you didn’t come,” he mumbles, reaching out and putting a hand on your stomach.
“no,” you admit. ever the gentleman, he gets up and discards the condom before settling his face in between your legs to return the favor.
after what feels like an eternity, you two decide to give it a rest. “shower?” he asks you, sitting up on the bed. you nod, your inner thighs sticky from all of your shenanigans.
you follow chanyeol to the bathroom on shaky legs and latch yourself onto him once you’re under the water. your arms wrap around his middle and you rest your head against his chest, sighing into him. chanyeol places a kiss on your forehead and you nearly whimper, missing the domesticity of it all.
you two wash up and then he gives you some of his clothes to wear. you smile to yourself at him knowing that you weren’t going to leave so soon. he tells you he’s going to order takeout, since he doesn’t feel like cooking, and passes you his phone to choose what you want to eat.
it’s easy to fall into that old rhythm like no time has passed, and like you didn’t let this whole thing crumble right before you.
while you wait for the food, you ride him on the couch, and then after you eat he fucks you lazily on the counter. your body feels beat up and tired in the best way, and the familiar limp you start to walk with feels good again.
you wake up to the smell of food, your limbs sore as you stretch. the bed is empty next to you, and it takes you a moment to realize that this isn’t your bed or your house. the realization makes you bite your lip, and you slip out of his bed and make your way downstairs.
“good morning,” he greets when you walk into the kitchen, a smile on his face. you return it and he pulls you into him, placing a kiss on your lips that leaves you feeling dizzy and slightly confused, but you don’t say anything. instead, you accept the plate of food he hands you and go sit down at the table.
chanyeol sits down beside you and pulls your legs across his lap, and your fork stills in midair. it’s all overwhelmingly familiar, and you still have yet to discuss where your relationship stands after last night. it wasn’t just sex for you—it never is with chanyeol—and you don’t know if he feels the same way.
you let him talk through breakfast, your mind swimming with thoughts that wonder what this all means. you don’t know if he was just testing you out again, but you don’t think he’d allow you to sleep over, and then cook you breakfast in the morning. you feel lightheaded, like you just got flipped upside down one too many times.
“you alright? what’s on your mind?” his voice takes you out of your head where you feel yourself drowning. he raises his eyebrows at you and you wave your hands in the air vaguely.
“just… thinking,” you try.
“about?”
you let out a breath and scratch the back of your head, pulling your gaze away from him. “um, us,” you say. chanyeol sits back in his seat and clears his throat. “i dont… what does this mean for us? what are we?” you ask helplessy, finally looking at him. chanyeol opens his mouth but closes it almost as quickly.
“i dont know,” he answers. you slump in your chair because you have no idea either.
“well, what do you want?”
you can see the gears turning in his brain and him weighing each response. the tension builds in the room as you stare at him, waiting for his answer to see if it’ll align with yours. “well… i dont really know if i want a relationship right now,” your stomach drops and you blink once, twice. “i like what we did last night, though.” and without actually saying it, he wants you two to be friends with benefits. he wants you, but not all of the extra baggage.
“okay,” you say, discreetly wiping your face and swiping away the tears pooling in your eyes.
“yeah?” he asks, and you nod even though it’s far from what you want. you just want him, and you’ll take what you can get.
you hold back tears as he fucks you on his bed again, but not because it feels so good and like too much at the same time, but because he’s stomping on your heart and doesn’t even realize it. your heart can’t handle a FWBs situation with him since you’re already way into deep with him.
it becomes too much as you think about it, your mind not in the present moment of him thrusting into you. the tears start to fall, one by one, until you’re full on sobbing and covering your face. “w-what’s wrong? am i hurting you?”
“yes!” you cry, and he immediately gets off of you. you roll away from him and curl yourself into a ball, feeling disgusted with yourself that you were willing to let him use you in such a way, dangling your heart on a string in front of you.
“y/n, talk to me,” chanyeol says, putting a hand on your shoulder. you shrug him off like you did during your initial break up, and he feels like he’s getting deja vu again. “please, y/n. talk to me, tell me what’s wrong.” his voice is full of concern because he knows there’s something else that’s really upsetting you.
“i cant do it,” you know you’ll probably lose him for good, but you’re willing to take that risk if you can’t have him the way that you want. you want him next to you in the mornings and calling you in the middle of his day. you don’t want to be a late night though, a booty call, to him. “i just can’t do it.”
chanyeol knows that you’re talking about your little agreement. he knew you’d end up backing out at some point, because he himself can’t even take it that seriously. he knows he’ll just wind up with feelings for you again since they never left.
“that’s okay,” he says, and he means it. your heart is heavy as you sit up and look over at him. chanyeols heart breaks to pieces when he looks into your eyes, feeling guilty for what he’s done. if only he could just confess and be honest about his feelings this time.
your goodbye is quiet and awful, and you feel like digging a hole and putting yourself in it the entire time. you leave feeling empty and hollow, and like you just got ran over by an eighteen wheeler. but hey, at least it wasn’t your fault this time.
#exo imagines#exo scenarios#exo x reader#exo x you#exo smut#exo angst#exo fluff#chanyeol angst#chanyeol smut#chanyeol x reader#chanyeol x you#chanyeol fic#chanyeol scenario#chanyeol imagine#chanyeol fanfic#chanyeol fluff
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Exo reaction making their s/o cry??
xiumin: i think he doesn't care at first. like, when he looks at you and sees your eyes tearing up he wouldn't be that fazed. he would bother though as the tears starts to fall, the expression on your face telling him he had gone too far. his heart falters, and he sighs because he knows he screw up. minseok might not apologize right away, but he'll do it the next morning or something, just give him time to also process his feelings.
suho: this is kinda tricky. junmyeon can either react by giving you the cold shoulder and letting you cry because you also hurted him (and he might cry himself), or by pulling you to his chest as soon as the tears starts falling and apologizing straight away. i think it depends on what's the reason why he made you cry - was it something stupid he said? he will apologize in a heartbeat. was it because of an argument that you two had and he still thinks you're being unreasonable? he will let you cry, sorry.
lay: "please, stop crying" is the first thing ypu hear once your eyes get wet - not because yixing is mad at you or anything, but because he can't stand the sight of you crying. it doesn't matter the reason, if you two were fighting, even if he's right about the argument; he hates seeing you cry, and the moment he does, it's all gone for him. he even forgets what he was going to say, what his point was, whatever. can't tell which one is hurting the most, you (who are crying) or yixing (who has the saddest eyes ever as he watches your tears roll down your face).
baekhyun: he has a soft, soooft heart. baekhyun can't stand seeing people cry, it breaks him too, so it wouldn't be different with you. let's say you two had an argument, and things escalated kinda quickly; firstly, baekhyun is the one to start crying, even though he tries to hold back as much as he can. secondly, the moment you start crying as well, he shuts up and reaches for you. he uses his thumbs to caress your tears away, not saying a damn word and fighting the urge to kiss you to make you calm down.
chen: another tricky one. jongdae can be kind of a fucker and not care if you're crying IF what you said back at him hurt him too. as he doesn't cry so often, maybe you won't know that you've hurted him, but if you did... you can cry all you want, he thinks it's only fair (as you don't know the damage you did inside him). but if not, if he messed up something "small" but that it still mattered to you, jongdae will sit beside you and talk about what he can do to show you how sorry he is (and he really is).
chanyeol: actually you're the one who's making him cry, shame on you (because i honestly think chanyeol is the most sentimental one out of all the members and he tries to be careful with his words because he knows the damage they can make).
d.o: kyungsoo is very logical about things, i think. i picture him as being the type of person to let you cry as you need to put it all out of your chest, but once you're done he will approach you and hold your hand as he apologizes, probably not for what he said/done but for hurting you, and say that if he's hurting you then maybe you two should think about your relationship because "i love you and it isn't supposed to be this way. are you sure i'm good for you? am i not doing the opposite of what i should?".
kai: it will all depend on what happened, to be honest. jongin is very soft hearted, but he will stomp his feet and not give in if he believes he's right about something. if he's not, then he will try to hug you and apologize, bu he won't like if you push him away because it's eating him up the fact that he was the one who got you messed up like that. jongin will pout and say things like "please, don't do that, i'm really sorry". i don't think it's that healthy, but that's something he has to work on.
sehun: he doesn't know how to react. sehun doesn't know if he should reach for you and take you into his arms, or if he should give you some space to deal with your own feelings. some emotions can make him uncomfortable, and it's not necessarily his fault, he just doesn't know what to do. but sehun is a mature guy - more than we think, actually -, so he will find by himself the balance between respecting your space and trying to apologize, which is actually learning how to read you and your body language. if you're crying silently, then he knows you might want him to make it up for you asap; if you're crying and swearing, not at him, but at the world in general, then he knows that you're just trying to settle your emotions down and that maybe it's better if you two don't speak for the rest of the day.
#exo reactions#exo imagines#exo fanfic#exo scenarios#exo x reader#exo x you#exo angst#exo#xiumin#suho#yixing#zhang yixing#byun baekhyun#baekhyun#chen#kim jongdae#chanyeol#d.o exo#kyungsoo#kai#kim jongin#sehun#oh sehun#kim minseok#kim junmyeon
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Ecstasy
Part 5 - Psycho
Characters: Reader x Baekhyun Feat. Chanyeol
Genre: Soloist AU, smut, angst, fluff
WC: 5.4k
Tag List: @nana-banana @xzyxbbh @iluvybs @greasywall @endzii23 @scopoliax @silent-potato23-blog @baekyeonoreo
Warnings for this chapter: explicit smut, fuckin while on drugs (LSD), drug use and its consequences
A/N: In case everyone hasn't already forgotten about this series because I suck horrendously at updating! Sorry! This is also most definitely the most intense thing I have ever written! There's a reason it took me so goddamn long lol hopefully I can be a little more consistent from now on
Masterlist
Addiction (noun): Disorder characterized by compulsive engagement in rewarding stimuli despite adverse consequences
“When’s your next day off?”
He sent her the text a few days after their last night together, a whole day already planned for them in his mind. He just had to figure out how he’d make it happen.
She eagerly let him know, and he told her he’d be picking her up that morning, surprisingly early, but she didn’t question it, she was getting to see him, after all. And from what it sounded like, she’d get him all to herself, all day, at his lavish penthouse.
Baekhyun once again insisted on keeping his plans for them secret, so when that morning arrived and he picked her up, she had no idea what she was in store for. However the last time he’d refused to tell her his plans they ended up getting high, and she had a hunch that it might be something similar.
“Are you finally gonna tell me what we’re doing today?” She asked him once he’d started driving, this time showing up in a different car, a silver convertible Porsche.
‘Hmmm.. No, but I’ll show you once we get to my place. The last surprise was fun though, wasn't it?”
He took his eyes off the road for a second to look over at her, his taunting smile daring her to disagree with him, but knowing she wouldn’t dare.
“So more drugs?”
He grimaced, “sounds bad when you say it like that.”
“Am I wrong though?”
“If I tell you that would ruin the surprise.”
She just laughed and rolled her eyes, deciding to wait until she had more details to really judge.
“You’ve been working all week right? Any more run-ins with Mr Kim?”
As soon as he said it, her eyes went to his arm. Now that he was wearing a t-shirt, she could clearly make out the mark from the cigarette, the burn still not completely healed, and even then, it looked like it might scar.
“I should be the one asking you that, you know.”
She saw him glance down at his arm too. “You didn’t answer the question.”
“No, I likely won’t see him again for a while, thank god.” She frowned, still disappointed that he was so reluctant to talk about it. “What about you though? Do you work with him a lot?”
“Unfortunately, yeah.” He still looked uncomfortably serious, but he perked up in less than a second as he pulled into the garage of his building. “But that’s just showbiz baby.”
He was so nonchalant about it, and left no room for her to protest, so she simply allowed him to lead her up to his beautiful apartment once again.
She hadn’t given too much thought as to what drugs Baekhyun had planned for them to take that day, pretty much assuming that it would be mushrooms again, or maybe some weed or molly. But after digging around a bit in one of his kitchen drawers, he pulled out an envelope containing a small piece of colorful paper, with perforated lines criss-crossing it, dividing it into smaller pieces still. She’s never seen it in person before, but quickly recognized it as LSD.
Just like the time before, he saw the hesitance on her face.
“Hey, what’s wrong? Last time everything ended up fine, and we had a great time, didn’t we?”
“I know we did, but this is different isn’t it? I really don’t want it to be too much or something and start freaking out.”
He sighed, setting the envelope back down on the counter and coming to her, leaning in for a quick kiss. “It’s just the two of us here, no interruptions, no obligations, just you, and me. I won’t let anything bad happen. If you start to feel overwhelmed, just tell me and I’ll do whatever it is you need me to to help you calm back down. That day at Chanyeol's house was the most… at peace, I’ve felt in a long time. I’ve been thinking a lot about that day, and what we talked about, that’s why I want to try this with you.”
“You haven’t done this before either?”
“No, I have, but it’s been a while, I don’t remember much of it.”
“Why don’t you remember it?”
“It's a long story, but I don’t remember much from that time of my life in general.”
As soon as the words left his mouth, he knew he’d said the wrong thing, she looked uncomfortable again.
“Y/n, sweetheart.” He cooed, and her eyes met his, feeling his warm hands intertwining with her own. “You don’t have to do anything, and I don’t want to pressure you, this is just something I’ve had on my mind lately. I still want to get to know you better.”
“Is it not possible to do that without getting high?”
“Of course it is, but you know what I mean.”
She thought back to the day they'd had out at Chanyeol’s house, and she understood what he was saying. “Okay maybe.”
“So what do you say, hm?” His hands ran down her shoulders, then her arms, eyes never leaving hers. The slight tilt of his head and the way he looked at her with his best puppy eyes ruined any ability she might’ve had to reason with herself.
“Alright, if you’re sure it’s a good idea.”
He grinned, and finally he was kissing her, really kissing her, not like the little peck from earlier. His tongue slipped past her lips, and his hand held her face to his own. It didn’t take long for her to start feeling weak in the knees.
As he pulled away he turned to the counter, grabbing the envelope again. He tore off two of the little squares of paper, placing one on his own tongue, and the other on hers.
“What now?”
He shrugged, “It'll start to kick in in about an hour, have you eaten? I can order us something, or see what I have here.”
They ended up making breakfast together, and she was surprised by how sweet he was being to her, even more so than usual. It didn't just feel like the usual flirtation that went on with him. Despite not being much of a cook himself, he did his best to help out, and the way he rested his chin on her shoulder, singing softly in her ear as she stood in front of the stove, made her heart flutter. When she was done he thanked her, and told her time and time again how great the meal was.
By the time they were done eating, she realized she was starting to feel the effects of the drug. Colors were becoming more vibrant, and patterns would start to move if she looked at them for long enough. It wasn't entirely dissimilar from the mushrooms, but it was definitely still different, especially the way her body felt.
Baekhyun must've noticed the way she was staring off at things, or just the unusually large size of her pupils, since he asked, “how are you feeling?”
“I'm not sure.. kind of weird.”
“Come here.”
He led her to the big cozy looking couch in his living room, facing the windows overlooking the river. He sat down, and she followed suit, resting between his spread legs, leaning her head back on his chest. Some music began to play, and even though they were just sitting there, she felt like her mind was going into overdrive.
If the mushrooms made her feel heavy, more in touch with nature, LSD was the opposite. She was buzzing, electric, almost. It wasn't unpleasant, but she didn't exactly enjoy it either.
“Are you okay? Your heart is racing.”
She wouldn't have even realized it if he hadn't brought it up, but he was right.
“I.. don't know.”
“Y/n, baby.”
She turned around, until she was basically laying on top of him on the couch, facing him.
His pupils somehow grew even larger when her eyes met his, and for a good minute, neither of them could look away. The rest of his face looked just as inviting. His skin smooth and sunkissed, pretty features in perfect harmony. And then there were his lips. Soft, pink, asking to be kissed. Eventually she gave into the temptation, and their lips collided.
That was a feeling she had not been prepared for, even in the slightest.
It was like the excitement of kissing him for the very first time, that night at the club, had come rushing back tenfold.
It was he who eventually pulled away, still looking at her with a bit of concern. “You're shaking.”
He took one of her hands that had been resting on his chest into his own, further confirming his previous words.
“Did that not feel crazy for you too?”
The way she looked at him, eyes wide, panting and shaking at the intensity of it, made his chest swell with pride. Any concern he showed quickly melted away as he grinned back at her. “Kiss me again.”
He didn't have to ask twice. She pressed her lips to his without hesitation, moaning into the feeling as waves of euphoria washed over her.
Baekhyun, too, could feel how much more intense it was, kissing her and touching her with the added excitement the drug offered. The MDMA as well as the mushrooms had given a similar effect, but not nearly to the same degree.
While the mushrooms had made him sentimental, wanting to hold her, feel the way her chest rose and fell in sync with his own, the LSD made him ravenous. Sex, while high on mushrooms, didn't even seem possible. The overall heaviness of the body high simply didn't feel sexy, but now he could think of nothing else.
But Baekhyun knew that they had all day, and was in no rush. For what could've been anything from several minutes to a few hours, the drug blurring time into irrelevance, they simply laid there, lips pressing together again and again, until he pushed his tongue past her lips, smiling into it when she once again moaned at the newfound depth of the kiss. With both hands on her waist he felt the way she continued to shake, overwhelmed by the new sensations.
Not wanting to overwhelm her too much, and still enjoying the onset of the drug, Baekhyun eventually pulled away, standing up from the couch, with her following.
He leaned in, forehead resting against hers with a wide grin on his pretty face. “Wanna dance?”
She smiled back at him and nodded, and soon the room was full of music, something sexy that would make them want to move.
With one hand in his own he twirled her around, placing himself behind her, hands on her hips as they both swayed to the beat. The heat of his chest pressed to her back and his words in her ear as he sang along further heightened how intoxicated she already was. The room around her appeared to melt and shift in a colorful whirlwind, though she didn’t mind it, still more focused on the man behind her than anything else. With the music pulsating through her, his body pressed to hers, she gave into it, even tearing up a little as she kept moving her body. This was the definition of euphoria, she thought. It simply couldn’t get any better than this, the rush of it all so overwhelming that it moved her to tears.
When she spun around in his arms, attaching her lips to his own, she saw fireworks behind her eyelids, colorful bursts filling her vision even as her eyes were closed. Every touch of his hands brought waves of delight that surged through her without even an ounce of reluctance. Baekhyun noticed her tears, but he could feel it too, not questioning even for a second if they came from anything but pure happiness.
She let out a yelp when he momentarily broke away before scooping her up in his arms, and carrying her into the bedroom.
Baekhyun, too, felt the burning need for more, seeming almost frantic in the way he laid her down, wasting not a single second before slotting himself between her legs.
He was on fire, his tongue in her mouth, dancing with her own as he tugged on her clothes with a kind of impatience she’d never seen before. He thought he would be able to stay patient, savor the feeling and enjoy her with some restraint, but he now saw how wrong he’d been. With the high at it’s full intensity, he was insatiable, he wanted every piece of her, the craving for more so intense even he began to lose it, hands shaking as he got the clothes off her body. First her shirt, then her pants, and eventually her bra, all thrown haphazardly across the room, no care for anything but the need for more skin.
She arched into him, pushing her hands past his shirt, her touch against his bare abdomen bringing a gasp from him. After one more heated kiss he sat up, pulling the fabric over his head and fussing with his belt, finally getting that off as well. When he leaned back in, he didn’t kiss her, instead, he found himself taking her face in his hand, staring.
“So beautiful… You make me feel so fucking crazy, you have no idea.”
His eyes kept scanning her face, taking her in all he could, the way his words made her lip quiver, the blush on her cheeks, it was all perfection, the high adding an aura of effervescence. To him, she was glimmering, sparkling.
“You’ve been making me crazy ever since I met you.” She answered, knowing she was just as insane for him.
His lips pressed themselves to hers, this time though, something felt different to him. He felt himself almost start to tear up, though he fought it off, not wanting her to see the way it all overwhelmed him, too. The emotions roared to a new peak, making him sentimental, kissing her deeper, in love with the way her hands on his back pressed him further into her, never wanting her warmth to leave him, not then, not ever, as far as he was concerned.
“You’re mine, baby, mine.”
The words were pressed into the side of her neck between kisses, and when her voice failed her, all she could do was nod.
“I want to hear you say it.”
She tried to get it out, she really did, but when his fingers briefly met the waistband of her underwear the words got caught somewhere between a gasp and a moan.
He moved slowly, hungry lips making their way down her neck, spending some time nipping at the sensitive area near her collarbone, before finally giving attention to her bare chest. His hands too squeezed and pinched at the sensitive skin where his lips couldn’t reach, and the sounds she made were music to his ears, though he still wanted to hear those words more than anything else.
“Fuck, say it, please.”
“I’m yours.”
By that point the onslaught of emotion had completely overpowered her, simply giving into the way he touched her, too far gone to even think, making it near impossible to form words. It was all like a dream, his touch combined with the high whisking her away to another plane of existence, one where she could do little more than lay back, shaking, gasping, taking in the waves of pleasure that came her way. The weight of him between her thighs and his mouth and fingers as they teased her nipples felt like heaven and hell all at once, both divine and almost frighteningly tempting. He could see it in the way she looked up at him, eyes glazed over, nothing behind them but desire, a deep yearning for more, even if she couldn’t express it, the intensity rendering her speechless.
In the back of her mind she realized the staggering difference between how he acted then compared to every other time they'd been in bed together. She felt the urgency in the way he touched her, hands that were usually so steady, so confident, now shaking, along with his unsteady breaths. Never before had he voiced such possessiveness either, though it didn't feel out of place in the slightest. She knew she belonged to him, no other man would ever be able to compare. He was so exhilarating, she felt that the piece of paper she'd had was nothing, the real drug was him.
She was already out of her mind, and his hand had yet to venture between her legs. With his mouth still on her chest, kissing and nibbling and sucking at the soft curves, he slowly began to venture south, each kiss on her stomach adding more fuel to the fire within her. When his fingers finally hooked themselves into the waistband, slowly pulling the last piece of clothing off her body, a loud moan fell from her lips. She lay there underneath him, panting, mind in a whirlwind, completely exposed, waiting for more.
Baekhyun was eager to deliver. His mouth went straight in, licking up the wetness he’d coaxed from her thus far, the feeling of his tongue incessantly flicking her clit making her hips push against his face, pleading with him for more. The taste made him groan, vibrations coursing through her, his lips and tongue bringing her close to release quicker than she knew possible. From the very first touch she’s already lost control, twitching and nearly screaming at the strength of her own desire. It was all too much, the tension leaving her helpless to his touch, fingers in his hair as she came on his tongue in mere minutes.
The orgasm washed over her like a rushing waterfall, knocking any rational thought from her mind as she shook and gasped. It was a new experience completely, the added rush of her high bending her mind into an unfamiliar torrent of pleasure. Finally prying her eyes open to look down at him between her legs, the smirk present on his wet lips was pure eroticism, his handsome face a work of art. The onslaught of her high had been so paralyzing she hadn’t even noticed the substantial volume of her moans, not until Baekhyun commented,
“My baby can’t help being loud for me, hm?”
A whine escaped her, anticipation building even further as Baekhyun stripped off the last of his clothes. He reclaimed his place between her thighs, looking down at her flushed face, basking in the warmth of the moment as they both stared, entranced. The beads of sweat on his face appeared more like precious pearls, lips a soft pink pillow, eyes of deep chocolate brown, baiting her to get lost. Even with the way the drug made everything shift and twist about, he stayed still, shining, glowing, illuminating her entire world.
He leaned in, kissing her with an unexpected tenderness, soft lips moving with hers gently, almost carefully. When he pulled back his forehead rested against her own, eyes fixed on hers.
“Do you want more?”
She nodded without any hesitation, and the smile on his handsome face was enough for more butterflies to erupt within her. By that point she was dripping, throbbing, wanting nothing more than to finally feel him inside.
“Can you say it for me?”
“Please, Baekhyun. I want - I need- more. Fuck, please.”
Her eyes were filled with greed and impatience as she watched him grab the packet from the nightstand and roll a condom onto himself, wondering how he was still able to keep it together enough to even consider such a thing. The room continued to dance and shift about in a dream like kaleidoscope as he moved himself over her again, both an anchor and a source of even greater insanity to her.
When she felt him finally push inside, it was like she was experiencing it for the very first time. Now chest to chest, fully flush, surrounded by him completely, she felt herself break. The tears were back, and with every push of his hips into her, sparks filled her distorted vision. She tried to look up at him, but her eyes felt heavy, unable to concentrate on anything but the feeling of him above her, and inside her.
Baekhyun was no better off. The drug amplified everything to such a degree that he too found himself letting go of any restraint, letting the high take him wherever it so pleased. His moans, and the ever increasing cadence of his thrusts told her just how affected he was, too. She began to move with him, rolling her body into his more or less involuntarily, just wanting to feel more of him, and he did all he could to deliver.
When his eyes finally met hers again, his thumb moved to wipe away the tears, though they only communicated to him her immense and paralyzing delight. The way she looked up at him encouraged him further, his hips hitting her more deeply, savoring the feeling every time he entered her, again and again.
The drug had overpowered her senses so entirely, that the lines, the boundary between herself and him began to fade into obscurity, she was a part of him, and he, a part of her. She sensed his pleasure, and felt it in her own body, the same way she knew he felt her, too. They melted together, the high and the closeness of being so intimately connected merging them into one.
Every time he filled her, she felt him brush against that delicious spot deep inside that made her tremble. He was perfection, beyond perfection, even. Having him there with her, enjoying her as she enjoyed him, whisked them away to a different form of reality. Their shared altered consciousness made it all so much heavier, more real than any sexual experience they could have while sober. This was how it was always supposed to be, they were both sure of it.
His hand clutching her face brought her eyes back to his, whimpering at his intense gaze.
“Who do you belong to, baby?”
“You.” She replied weakly, barely able to get the word out.
“Say it again.”
“You- Baekhyun, oh my god.”
Her words stirred up a whirlwind inside him, his lips latching themselves onto the spot on her neck that made her weakest. The pace of his thrusts picked up even more, and she felt her whole body start to tingle, starting from the tips of her toes moving up her body in waves, until she was consumed by it, and again, she fell.
This orgasm was somehow even better than the last, leaving her shaking, gasping, seemingly tearing apart every atom in her body, and then putting her back together again. Her vision went white, arching, twitching, moaning and completely out of her damn mind as he kept fucking her through it, until he too reached his peak.
When it happened for him, he kissed her with such force, such passion, that she couldn’t breathe, though she didn’t feel she needed to anyway. His affection felt more crucial than oxygen, happily accepting his lips as she floated slowly back to her altered state of reality.
They both lay in the aftermath of the near religious experience they just shared, sweating, panting, still pressed to each other as they recovered from the profoundly overpowering encounter that the drug turned their passion into.
Even after several minutes had passed, she was still dizzy, still unable to come to terms with how incredible Baekhyun had just made her feel.
“I love you.” She whispered, thoughtless, the otherworldly memory of it all and his possessive words drifting through her mind. For a while, he didn’t respond, and she didn’t expect him to. It didn’t feel like some sort of big confession, just what the drug and the height of the moment naturally pulled from her lips.
“I..” he paused, becoming tense, eyes digging into her own. “What?”
The harsh change in his tone snapped her back to reality, and she realized her mistake.
“No- shit, I didn’t mean that-”
“What the fuck did you just say?” He said, sitting up, eyes squeezed shut with a pained expression now on his face.
“I’m sorry, it just slipped out in the moment.” She looked at him, worry turning to panic as the look on his face slowly turned into one of anger.
“Get out.”
“What?”
“Get out.” He said again, this time raising his voice, eyes still shut, refusing to look at her.
She started to sit up, tears welling in her eyes, though this time they didn’t come from a good place at all.
“But, you said you wouldn’t let anything bad happen, I’m sorry, I just- I-”
When he finally did meet her eyes, they were hard and mean, not softening at all even at the sight of her tears.
“You can’t be here anymore. Get your shit and get the fuck out.”
“Baekhyun, please, I can't just leave, I'm sorry, really. Please.” She begged, but he wasn't having any of it.
“I said get the fuck out of my apartment. Right fucking now.”
She'd never seen that look on his face before, her shock and upset morphing into fear.
With that she got up, stumbling as she gathered her clothes, leaving his room in a disoriented haze as she got herself dressed, crying harder and harder as the seconds ticked by. The bright colors had turned dark and dull and the patterns that before swirled around so beautifully turned sharp, frightening in their unpredictability. She was delirious as she passed the threshold to his apartment, the hallway seeming to close in on her as she struggled toward the elevator. Luckily nobody saw her as she left the building, eventually collapsing onto a nearby bench under the midday sun, surrounded by the bustling city.
As her eyes squeezed shut she only saw his face, twisted in anger as he told her to leave. It haunted her, though she didn’t want to face the city either, the cacophony of cars and other people entirely too much to handle. She had to get home, and with no other real option, she pulled out her phone, struggling with it for a minute before finally managing to call her best friend.
“Suhyun?”
“Hi! I thought you were gonna be with Baekhyun all day, is everything all right?”
“No…” she said, voice shaking, and even from over the phone Suhyun could tell that something was very wrong.
“Are you okay? Where are you? What happened?”
“I- I don't know, I need you to come get me.”
“Where are you?”
“I don't know, I'm sitting in front of his building, he kicked me out.”
“He did what? You sound weird, what's going on?”
“He gave me drugs, I don't know what to do, I can barely use my phone, I can't take the subway, you have to come get me.”
Suhyun had known her friend long enough to know that something awful had happened, and needed to get there as soon as possible.
“Okay, just stay where you are, I can check your location and come to you, I'll be there as soon as I can.”
She nodded, and her friend on the phone grew even more worried.
“Y/n?”
“Yes! I'm on a bench. I won't move. Please hurry.” Her voice unsteady with the onslaught of tears still pouring out of her.
To make sure her friend was safe, Suhyun stayed on the phone with her until she pulled up, pulling her into the car before making her way towards her friend's apartment.
She was crying quietly to herself in the passenger seat, trying to focus on what was going on outside the window, but still ending up squeezing her eyes shut again and again, seeing his face glaring back at her, making her heart sting every time.
“Can you tell me what happened?”
Finally she looked over at Suhyun, and she saw in her eyes that she wasn't in her normal state of mind, growing more and more worried by the minute.
She just shook her head, too overwhelmed to get a word out as the sobs ran through her.
The day had been so perfect, and because of a few little words he'd seemingly snapped, becoming a completely different person. The harshness with which he'd told her to get out kept replaying, she couldn't escape no matter how hard she tried. His face and his words had etched themselves into her mind, the drug making it all so much more horrible.
They eventually reached her apartment, and Suhyun tucked her into bed, holding her, asking once again, “what happened?”
“He wanted to do LSD together,” she eventually choked out “and we- we had sex, and I felt so insane after, I said I love you to him, just because of how crazy it all felt, and he lost it, and yelled at me that I had to get out.”
“He kicked you out of his apartment knowing you were on drugs?”
She nodded.
“Are you still really high? How bad is it? ”
“I could barely work my phone to call you. All I can see when I close my eyes is his face when he yelled at me to get out but when they're open everything is moving and looks like it's about to attack me. It's awful, I just want this to stop already.”
Suhyun stroked her hair as she cried, comforting her, but was growing more and more angry as well. She decided it would be best to take her phone for a while, worried Baekhyun would try to contact her and make things even worse. She took it from where her friend had discarded it on the bed, sliding it into her pocket.
She stayed like that for hours, just keeping her friend company, talking to her, doing her best to reassure her, seeing the way pain and fear consumed her. When she felt the phone start to vibrate she made an excuse to leave the room, and sure enough, it was him.
“Y/n, I'm so-”
“This is her friend. She can't talk to you right now.”
“I need to talk to her, give her her phone back.” She could hear the desperation in his voice, but she didn't care.
“No. She's fucking wrecked because of you. You threw her out onto the street while she was high out of her goddamn mind. She could've gotten arrested for Christ's sake, all because of your selfish bullshit. If you care about her even in the slightest, and genuinely want what's best for her, you're going to leave her alone. For good. She doesn't need you to fuck up her life even more.”
“Please-”
“Goodbye.”
Suhyun ended the call, cutting him off. When he called again and again, she put the phone on mute, deleting every trace of his trying to contact her. The last thing her friend needed was more of him.
At home in his apartment, Baekhyun cursed himself, nearly throwing the phone into a wall. Unbeknownst to both of the girls, he wasn’t much better off.
Those three words had set something off inside him. His high took an awful turn as he watched her leave the apartment, overcome with anger, but mostly, fear. When he called and couldn’t get through to her, it got even worse. Suhyun’s warning to stay away frustrated him beyond belief, but as much as he wanted to talk to her, he had no clue what he would even say, he couldn’t even understand his own feelings.
The guilt and confusion turned the rest of his day into a living nightmare, hoping that he’d somehow still be able to win her back. However as the hours passed, he did come to a realization.
It wasn’t her words that had caused him to suddenly become so agitated, it was the fact that he’d almost said it back.
#baekhyun smut#baekhyun fic#baekhyun fanfic#baekhyun#baekhyun angst#exo fanfic#exo smut#exo fic#exo angst#exo#kpop smut
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Sehun: Breakup Texts
Sehun sat in between Suho and Baekhyun—on Minseok’s couch—playing a few rounds of Mario Kart with the rest of his members.
“You suck, Baek,” Suho muttered from his breath, watching in annoyance as he crossed 8th place in the final run as Baekhyun finished with 1st.
“Ha! Told you that you guys can’t beat me. Try me, try me!” Baekhyun excitedly turns to Sehun. “Sehun, race me next.”
Suho passed the controller to Sehun, but Sehun stood up and gave it to Chanyeol instead.
“What? Are you leaving?” Baekhyun asked his younger friend.
“No, but I really have to use the bathroom. I’ll race you when I get back,” he responded, giving Baekhyun a reassuring nod.
Baekhyun nodded and excitedly started punching Chanyeol’s thighs as the next round of Mario Kart begun.
Sehun excused himself and started walking out into Minseok’s hallway. When he approached the bathroom door, however, someone was ready inside.
“Hey,” Sehun lightly pounded the door, “hurry up in there!”
Suddenly, a faint buzz tickled the side of his thigh. He reached his hand into his pocket, searching for his phone.
[New Message: My Love 💞]
Sehun exhales deeply as he opens your text, realizing it was pretty late and you were probably asking where he was.
“Oh?”
What he wasn’t expecting, however, was a dull, rather empty message with the single few words that made a chill run down his spine:
[My Love💞: Sehun, I think we should breakup]
What!? Sehun feels his heart skip several beats as he feels his emotions drop immediately, both in fear and of confusion.
[Sehun: Call me.]
Sehun worriedly looked around the hallway and quietly made his way into Minseok’s empty, dark bedroom. The EXO boys were still howling in the living room, and no one seemed to notice him slip away.
[My Love💞: I can’t. I don’t want to say it again. I prefer saying it over text.]
Sehun rubbed a sweaty hand over his neck, not knowing what to say or how to properly react.
[Sehun: Why are you doing this?? Is this a prank? You know I don’t like pranks like these…]
A few seconds passed before another notification from you ensued.
[My Love💞: Please don’t ask questions. It’s a personal decision.]
[Sehun: You can’t just leave me without an explanation... is it something I did? At least give me some sort of closure?]
[My Love💞: Sehun don’t ask me anything, please]
[Sehun: but we were so happy together. We were so healthy together.]
[Sehun: Or am I wrong, were you not happy…?]
[Sehun: please answer me, say anything… is it something I can fix!?]
[Sehun: you can’t just leave me like this!?!?]
[Sehun: please??….]
Sebum’s heart was racing, and he kept refreshing your messages awaiting any response. His anxiety slowly started kicking in as the minutes passed with no response from you.
[My Love💞: <is typing…>]
[My Love💞: I’ve taken most of my things from the apartment. I’m leaving tonight.]
Sehun felt overwhelmed, covering his mouth with his right hand and looking around Minseok’s room for a tissue box. Thankfully, the boy kept one in the top cabinet of his nightstand.
Sehun reached for the box and lifted a tissue paper up to his face. Almost immediately, the silent tears started rolling from his reddening eyes.
[Sehun: please tell me at least why?]
[Sehun: you’re the only one I love. This is unexpected for me too, please understand it]
[Sehun: it’s bad enough you’re breaking up with me over text, but if it’s a problem we can fix I’ll work hard for us to get better]
[My Love💞: <is typing…>]
[My Love💞: Sehun. Gosh. I’VE FALLEN IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE]
[My Love💞: there, I said it. I never meant to purposely go out of my way to cheat on you, but it just sort of happened…]
[My Love💞: but you can’t even get mad at me because I see you so little since you’re always so busy and you’re always under so much scrutiny. I can’t take it Sehun, I can’t take your lifestyle as a kpop artist anymore. I can’t be your secret partner forever anymore!]
[My Love💞: the hiding in public, the way I have to ignore you so as to not raise suspicion, the way I have to wait around for your schedules to clear up except you’re ALWAYS busy. what am I to you? How have we even made it this long? I feel like I barely even know you!]
[My Love💞: Gosh, sorry, I didn’t even mean to lash out. I wanted to end things quickly. I wanted to be yours, with no risk of damaging an image or reputation attached. I wanted us to work, but it’s impossible because I don’t want to mess your career up. You don’t deserve it.]
[My Love💞: let’s just end it here and please block my number and I’ll block yours]
[My Love💞: don’t text me anymore]
Sehun read the last texts from you over and over again, his throat tightening more and more. The tears rolled harder, the muffled sobs grew more desperate for you.
It happened again. Again.
Another relationship I couldn’t save.
[Sehun: I’m not mad at you. I’m sorry I couldn’t do more.]
[My Love💞: <is typing…>]
[My Love💞: don’t make this harder than it already is. I won’t respond anymore.]
Sehun closed the chat and turned off his phone, wanting to desperately fling it across the room, but also feeling a need to hold onto it in case you would text him again.
But you didn’t.
Sehun sat hunched over at the edge of Minseok’s bed, elbows against his knees and hands covering his face.
The first soft whimpers of pain escaped his lips. He wept angrily at himself, not you. What could he have possibly done differently? Wasn’t the relationship going well?
‘I can’t take your lifestyle as a kpop artist anymore!”
Your heavy words repeatedly lingered on in his head. He quietly detested himself for not noticing the signs of your distance sooner.
But perhaps you were right. How could have he noticed you were escaping from his arms, anyway?
The last time you’d spoken was… almost eight days ago!
How do I fix myself? How do I fix my career? How can I live a normal life without having to hide the most important parts of myself from my own supporters!?
Sehun is too deep in his own sorrowful thoughts to notice when Minseok walks in.
“Sehun? Oh, I figured you’re in here— I’m sorry, have I interrupted something? Are you okay?”
Minseok quickly walks up to his younger friend and sits gently next to him at the edge of the bed, patting his back gently and waiting for the younger boy to speak up.
Sehun says nothing, but looks down at his phone and opens your chat again. He motions the last few messages to his older friend.
“Sehun,” Minseok reaches over to hug his younger friend, letting him calm down in his arms. “I’m here, I’m ready to listen if you need me to.”
Sehun wipes the last of his tears and shuts his phone off.
Eleven months gone to waste. I’m surprised we even lasted this long.
“Minseok,” Sehun quietly whispers, “can I ask you something?”
Minseok nods.
“Being a kpop artist was never easy. But… when does it get easier? You lose people you love because of the backlash you get from… from anything, really. But I don’t want to hide the most important parts of me anymore. What can we do?”
Minseok sighed, smiling up at his friend.
“This is more of a conversation you could one day have with Jongdae,” he smiled. “because I’m sure it was never easy for him to tell the world about his new family.”
“But,” Sehun frowned, “he got so much backlash for it. Why? Why can’t we just—“
“Sehun,” Minseok whispers, “regardless of what you do or don’t do with your life, those who truly love you will stand by whatever it is that you decide to take on next. Just as long as your choices are healthy. I’d rather get backlash for breaking out of this rigged kpop-image box and be at my happiest with one pure supporter, than to be withheld in this unhealthy parasocial image and wishing things were different.”
Sehun nods. “It… it sounds like Jongdae’s case has already started to break us from the box then, huh?”
Minseok smiled, nodding gently. “Soon, you will be able to say and share these important things in your life and not risk losing them or your career, because… well, because things will get better. Things will always get better. You’ll break the box one day, Sehun. You just have to take it one day at a time.”
#kpop#kpop imagines#exo#exo sehun#exo imagine#exo fluff#exo angst#exo imagines#exoedit#exo minseok#exo x reader#exo xiumin#exo Chen#exo jongdae#exo jongin#exo junmyeon#exo Kai#exo suho#exo kyungsoo#exo lay#lay zhang#Exo chanyeol#exo baekhyun#exo sehun imagines#exo sehun fanfic#oh sehun#oh sehun fanfic#oh sehun imagine#oh sehun x reader#oh sehun request
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✧*ૂ༄bee’s masterlist
PN: ❀ fluff ; ☾ angst ; ♢ sad ; ✩ for adults ; ♤ smut ; ♡ request
For any request ,please,check the guideline
✧ EXO
✧ Kim Junmyeon
December on the couch ♤
✧ Byun Baekhyun
Metanoia ✩ ♡
Commitment issues ☾ ♡
Unexpected gift ❀ ♡
✧ Park Chanyeol
What we did in the library ♤
A good action can change your life ❀ ♡
✧ Kim Jongdae
coming soon…
✧ Kim Minseok
coming soon…
✧ Kim Jongin
coming soon…
✧ Oh Sehun
Have a soft spot for me ❀♡
✧ Zhang Yixing
Ray of sunshine,the clouds are vanishing ❀ ♡
✧ D.O. Kyungsoo
coming soon…
✧ Specials
Halloween advent calendar🎃
#exo x you#exo x y/n#exo x reader#exo imagines#exo fanfic#exo#exo angst#exo fluff#exo smut#exo masterlist#suho x reader#suho x you#sehun x you#sehun x reader#baekhyun x y/n#baekhyun x reader#chanyeol x reader#kai x reader#jongin x reader#xiumin x reader#kyungsoo x reader#jongdae x reader#kpop smut#kpop angst#kpop masterlist#kpop imagines#kpop fanfic#yixing x reader#lay x reader#exo k
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