Scrolling through the same seven gifs of your non-canon/kiss-less otp like they'll actually kiss if you just hit the next button one more time.

What an eventful night

Bruce: *leaving Thor’s room*

Loki: *leaving Strange’s room*

Y/n: *leaving Bucky’s room*

Loki: Really sister? The Russian assassin?

Y/n: First of all, he’s from Brooklyn. Second of all, Bruce, did you just leave Thor’s room?

Bruce: Yep

Loki: I knew it

Valkyrie: *leaves Carol’s room*

Peter: *comes back from MJ’s house*

Bruce: You too, kid?

Loki: Nice 🙂

Steve: *leaves Nat’s room* 😳

Scott: *leaving Hope’s room*

Sam: *leaves Maria’s room*

Sam: I knew you were fucking Nat!

Y/n: I already knew.

Peter: My OTP is real?!

Steve: Shut up!

Val: I just wanted toast

*Silence*

Steve: No one tells Tony or Pepper

Peter: Deal

Loki: Captain, my sister is fucking Sergeant Barnes

Y/n: Loki!

Steve: I have been shipping you too for so long

Sam: Haha! This is awesome!

Bruce: *enters Thor’s room* Thor, I’m sleeping with you

Y/n: *enters Bucky’s room* Yeah, dekta I’m sleeping with you

Bucky: *laughs because he overheard the entire conversation

Wanda: *opens her door* Shut up! Vision doesn’t know about all this and he is too fragile to comprehend this!

Peter: Yes Miss Maximoff

Happy Birthday

Summary: It's your birthday and the only person who doesn't seem to be excited about it is you.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Mentions of death. Angst. Fluff. Language probably. My poor attempts at being funny.

Word Count: 2.5K

A/N: This story was completely self-indulgent, but I hope someone out there likes it!

Masterlist

You’ve always been very reluctant to celebrate your birthday.

You haven’t had a birthday party since you were 12. The following year your mom died a couple of days before and neither you nor your family were in the mood to celebrate anything.

It wasn’t by any means unexpected, she had been sick for a few years, but it still hit you hard.

You were the youngest and were far too young when she first got sick to really understand everything going on.

You were 8 and all you really remember is watching your mom get more and more sick until eventually there was nothing more the doctors could do.

Her death hit you hard and you closed yourself off, never talking about it or even crying after the day of her funeral. To this day you’ve still never cried, in front of others or even by yourself.

You started exercising to channel all your energy, refusing to do anything more like the therapy your family suggested. 

When you were 15 you discovered SHIELD and decided you wanted to help others, so you signed up for the SHIELD Academy, working your hardest and pushing yourself to your very limit.

You ended up being not only the youngest cadet ever, but the youngest to actually graduate and then the youngest recruit at SHIELD at only 16 years old.

Natasha was very impressed when she heard about you and took a liking to you, convincing Fury to make you part of her team during her missions and teaching you everything she knows.

That’s how you ended up in the Avengers Initiative, not that you felt you didn’t deserve it since you know how hard you worked and everything you gave up to work towards this achievement. 

The team themselves were initially skeptical since you were barely 18 during the battle of New York, but they were quickly proven wrong when they saw how well you handled yourself against the Chitauri. 

You were devastated when SHIELD fell, but carried on as an Avenger, battling Ultron and then moving to the Compound with the team.

You met the actual Bucky for the first time when you were 22, during the whole Civil War thing with Baron Zemo. Like Natasha, you were on Tony’s team, fighting mostly Pietro, but the conflict eventually ended. 

It took Tony some time to get over the whole “Bucky killing his parents while brainwashed” thing, but, as he likes to say, he can’t call himself a genius without admitting that Bucky didn’t have much of a choice. 

Thanks to Tony’s help Shuri was able to find a solution to Bucky’s brainwashing faster than she would’ve alone, meaning Bucky didn’t have to go back into cryo and was pretty quickly cleared to join the team, about a year after the airport battle in Leipzig.

You were warmly accepted by everybody and, the more the team grew the more you felt at home with these people.

And now you wish you could burn down the whole compound because, somehow, Tony convinced you to have a birthday party for the first time in 13 years because, in his words, 'you only turn 25 once'.

Good news is you managed to make him limit the guest list to the team and other people close to you like Maria Hill and Fury. Bad news is you’re still gonna be the center of attention, which you hate.

You couldn’t stop Tony from making everyone dress up for the party, and you couldn’t stop the team from getting you gifts even though you insisted all you wanted was everyone together and to have fun with them since for the longest time nobody ever even knew when your birthday was. 

What you didn’t realize was that the only person more worried than you about your gifts was Bucky.

Since he joined the team the two of you have gotten close, starting with his first training with the team where he very loudly told Steve about his disbelief that someone as young and small as you could actually be an asset to the team.

You quickly put him in his place by taking him down after less than two minutes of sparring, taking full advantage of his underestimating you because he “didn’t want to hurt a pretty little thing like you.”

Admittedly he was impressed and wasn’t shy about letting you know that, while the rest of the team snickered at his initial shock when you pinned him down.

You became friends after that, not as close as you’d like but friends nonetheless.

If you were honest with yourself you’ve been harboring a little crush on the supersoldier, but he’s never shown any interest so you resigned yourself to just being his friend.

Something that you did come to treasure, though, is your and Bucky’s late night talks.

It started with you walking in on him in the kitchen on a late night where you couldn’t sleep, nothing new to you, but the two of you barely talked other than acknowledging each other.

You took a bottle of water and left.

A couple of days later you ran into him again and you stood there in silence while you made yourself a cup of tea and then left for your room.

A few days later again he was just sitting there and said nothing as you made your tea, except this time you put a cup in front of him and silently took a seat next to him at the counter.

Two nights later when you arrived at the kitchen he was already there with a cup of tea in front of him and one in front of the seat next to him.

You didn’t want to assume it was for you, but you took a chance when you noticed it was the cup you always used, a blue mug with Stitch on it that says “Let’s get weird”. Your favorite in fact.

You hesitantly sat down next to him and, without you having to ask or without even looking at you, he told you that the nights you stay up late because you can’t sleep you tend to be more quiet during the team dinners and while you hang out afterwards.

You didn’t say anything in return and just sat there, trying not to overthink how much he seemed to watch you.

But the more nights you spent like that, the more you two talked and you gathered quickly that Bucky is a very observant person, nothing more.

You loved the time you spent together after dark where you’d talk about everything and anything, but come morning it was almost as if it never happened, which you came to accept.

It weirdly made the nights you spent talking even more special, which was almost every night.

But back to the present, you’re currently getting ready with Natasha and Wanda, who know much more than you about hair and makeup and are always happy to help you out with getting ready for Stark parties. 

You put on the black cocktail dress with rhinestones all over the corset and a slit down the left side, then the three of you make your way to the party room and you take a deep breath before entering.

Everyone is already there, all dressed up in fancy clothes as they all shout “Happy Birthday”.

You laugh and say hi to everybody while they all take turns hugging you, there’s not too many people but everyone important to you is there.

Even Laura and Clint’s kids are there, which you consider a second family at this point, since Laura always did treat you like a daughter.

You hate to admit that it's a nice party.

Knowing you, everyone makes an effort to not put you too much at the center of attention and you just go around talking to your friends like every other party.

Eventually time comes for the cake and, the moment you kind of dreaded, opening the gifts.

Since it's the first birthday you allowed the team to celebrate everyone decided to go all in for your gifts, which you picked up on from the very first gift you open.

Pietro got you a first edition of “The Picture Of Dorian Gray” which is your all time favorite book, Wanda and Maria got you a leather jacket and an amazing pair of boots that you knew were expensive because you were all out shopping together when you came across them.

Steve got you a gold heart-shaped locker with a picture of the team inside it, Natasha got you a charm bracelet with a little charm to represent everyone on the team, and Sam got you a cute necklace with your birth stone on it.

When you open Fury’s gift you start laughing since it's a gun, a SIG SAUER P226 to be precise, which is very Fury.

“It was my first gun when I joined SHIELD.” He says with a smile and you smile back, knowing how much thought he put into this gift.

You open Clint’s gift next, a bow and arrow that he already taught you how to use, and Laura got you a pair of diamond earrings.

Your heart melts when you open Lila, Cooper and Nathaniel’s gifts, respectively a friendship bracelet, an Avengers action figure of yourself and a Stitch plushie.

The three of them hug you tightly as you say thank you and now you only have two gifts left, Tony’s and Bucky’s, and they’re both little boxes. 

You open Tony’s next, thinking it’s some fancy necklace or earring but you frown when you see a car key.

“Is this the key to your car?” you ask Tony, knowing full well you’re holding the key to an Audi R8 Spyder, the car Tony’s let you borrow so many times you’re now wondering if he’s gifting you his spare set of keys.

“No.” He says casually “It’s the key to your car.”

You’re even more confused and simply stare at him with your mouth gaped, not really processing the information.

“Y-you… You got me a car?!” You almost yell out of shock and everyone else starts laughing at your antics when you start basically jumping up and down and hugging Tony, squealing like a little girl.

“Well, come on, let’s go see it!” Tony says enthusiastically after you’ve calmed down, and you get up, just as enthusiastic, but are stopped by Steve’s voice.

“Wait, wait. You have one gift left.” He says, picking up the small box and giving it to you. “It’s from Bucky.”

You were so pumped up by the car, you almost forgot about it and completely miss the mischievous look Steve gives Bucky and the murderous glare Bucky gives back.

You also miss Bucky starting to protest before you open his gift, but he instantly shuts up when he sees your face falling the second you open it.

It’s a small necklace with a blue rose in it, it really looks like something you’d give a little girl more than a 25 year old woman.

You look at it for a minute, running your finger on it before you raise your head and look at Bucky.

The whole room goes silent as they all watch you worriedly, everyone noticing immediately that tears are streaming down your face.

Nobody understands what’s happening and nobody knows how to react or what to do, it’s like they’re all frozen by the sight of you being vulnerable for the first time ever. 

Meanwhile Bucky’s heart is beating so loud he’s sure everyone around him can hear it, and he feels himself starting to panic at the thought of having ruined your birthday with that stupid gift.

Everybody else got you expensive gifts and all he did was get you a small, cheap necklace that reminded him of a story you briefly talked about once on one of your late night talks about a necklace you had as a kid.

He saw it at the mall while looking for a gift for you, remembering the sweet smile you had on your face when you mentioned it and the fleeting sad look he thought he saw when you told him you lost it when you were 12.

He was really proud of himself for that gift, but the more he saw the other gifts you got the more he regretted his choice, especially after Tony gave you a fucking car.

And now you were crying, not saying anything while just looking at him.

He doesn’t know what to expect from you at the moment, nobody does, he thinks you might yell, throw his gift back at him, tell him how much you hate it and him.

But you surprise everyone by throwing your arms around Bucky’s neck, hugging him tightly while crying into his shoulder.

You honestly forgot telling Bucky about that story and certainly didn’t expect him to remember it, especially since you always got the feeling that he didn’t care about your talks as much as you.

You just assumed that come morning he deleted everything you told him to make room for more important things, and you didn’t blame him.

But he didn’t.

What you didn’t tell him about the necklace is that your mom gave it to you because blue roses were her favorite, you had that necklace since you were born but you somehow lost it the day of her funeral.

That day you lost the two most important things in your life and cried yourself to sleep, and that was the last time you allowed yourself to be weak and cry.

Until today.

Bucky hesitantly wraps his arms around you, rubbing your back hoping to get you to calm down. He looks around at the rest of the team, panicking a little and not knowing what to do.

Everyone else is as clueless as he is, never having seen you in such a state before.

Bucky starts apologizing, his heart breaking at the sight of you crying, and he feels horrible that it’s because of him.

You shake your head quickly and pull away a little to look at him, wanting to reassure him you’re not sad or angry but incredibly happy, but words refuse to come. You take a deep breath to calm yourself and finally manage to speak.

“Thank you. You have no idea how much this means to me.” It’s quiet, but it’s something, and it’s enough to make Bucky let out a breath of relief at knowing you don’t hate him or his gift.

He brings you back in for another tight hug, almost forgetting about everyone else in the room as you hug him back without hesitation.

You’re honestly not even embarrassed at crying, all you care about at the moment is Bucky, his arms around you while he lets you bury your face in his neck, like you’ve been wanting to do for years now.

“Happy birthday, doll.” He whispers in your ear and, for the first time in 13 years, you really feel like it is.

Y/n looking around the common room, with all of the Avengers talking, playing board games, and watching movies.

They sigh in content, finally feeling relaxed and safe.

Sam: What are you so smiley about L/n?

Y/n hums: Just happy is all

The others glance around at each other and smile. Y/n had been pretty new. Coming from a bad background like most of them. This was the first time they said something like that.

Tony: I think this calls for an Avengers pile.

Y/n's eyes widen in horror.

Y/n: Dude, I said I was happy, not wanting death.

Thor: To late!

All of the Avengers pile onto the couch with Y/n effectively trapping them.

Y/n struggles and tries to get away.

Y/n: Guuuuuuysssss! Get offah me! This sucks!

Nat hums: Bull

The others murmur agreements.

Not too long after Y/n gives up and just lets it happen.

Y/n: ..... okay, maybe this is nice

Peter: I knew you loved us!

Y/n half asleep but still sarcastic as ever: Don't tell my teammates. It'll go to their heads.

They chuckle, and after a while, they all drift off to sleep.

It was a sight to see for Maria the next morning. The Earth's Mightest Heros and most skilled people in a giant pile on the couch happily sleeping.

Lighting Bug - Chapter 22

Masterlist

Warning: guilt, form of self-harm, swearing, mention of death, Bucky needs a hug, mention of nightmares and past abuse

Relationships: Wandanat x daughter!reader, Maria x reader (platonic), Sam x reader (platonic), Bucky x reader (platonic), Rhodey x reader (platonic)

Word count: 3.5k

You were exhausted right down to your bones as you sat at the counter with a cup of tea in your hands and stared into the green liquid. There was no way you were falling asleep with those images moving in your head. “Hey kid,” Sam said suddenly. You jumped at the unexpected voice. “Are you okay? Your bagel has been done for a few minutes.” You forgot you put one in there. You stood up to grab it but Rhodey held out his hand to stop you. He grabbed a plate and placed the bagel on it then spread on it that you must have gotten out. Gods, you were beginning to lose it. You smiled as he sat in front of you.

“I didn’t sleep well last night.” You answered Sam.

“Nightmares?” Rhodey guessed.

“More like a memory,” you took a bite of your bagel, hoping they wouldn’t ask more questions.

“Rhodes and I haven’t gone to the batting cage in a while. Do you want to join us?” Sam asked. You stared at him, slowly chewing on the bagel. You had no idea what a batting cage was. “It’s a baseball thing. You go and hit baseballs and pretend to be a pro athlete.”

“Ohhh,” you said, standing up to throw the other half of your bagel away. “You could have just said that.” Sam sighed, shaking his head. “Sure I have nothing planned for today.” Plus it would be nice to get out of the tower. “FRIDAY, can you tell Natasha and Wanda where I’m going to be?” You made a mental note to ask Tony for a new phone.

“Of course, Miss. Y/n,” the AI said. “Have fun you three.” It was a 45-minute drive from the tower in a part of town you had never been to. ‘Caesar’s Bat and Pizzeria.

“Can we get pizza after?” You asked as Rhodey parked the car and you unblocked your seat belt.

“We can get whatever you want,” he said. The three of you got out of the car and walked over to the building. Sam held open the door for you. The sound of loud arcade machines and laughter made you jump.

“My favorite Avengers!” A man said from behind a counter. “Where the hell have you two been? Thought you forgot about ol'Casear.” Sam chuckled.

“Hard to forget you, big man,” Caesar glared at him.

“Are you calling me fat?” You tried to cover your laugh with a cough but Caesar glanced at you. “You guys adopt a kid or something.”

“Eh kind of,” Rhodey shrugged. “You got a spot open for us.” The man continued to stare at you but you smiled and gave him a small wave.

“Yeah, same spot as always,” he said. “Come find me if you need anything.” You followed the two Avengers to a stall in the corner, there was no one next to you, and you were grateful to look like an idiot in front of some strangers. The space reminded you of the shooting range at the tower but instead of targets at the end, there was a screen.

“Wait,” you said, sitting down. “How is any of this safe with it being inside and this close to one another?” Sam smiled.

“It’s all VR,” he pulled out his wallet and pulled out his wallet, took out a car with the shop’s logo, and scanned it at the table you were sitting at. The table changed to a TV screen and it showed a baseball stadium. “You can change the stadium where you are hitting. We’ll keep it at Yankee for now.” Rhodey appeared with a bat and goggles. “Watch this.” You watched Rhodey put on the goggles and stepped into the open space. The screen changed to a character stepping up to bat. “You can change the speed of the ball pitched, complete challenges, and set up tournaments.” He began and he hit the first ball pitched to him. It sounded like you were at a baseball game.

“This is cool,” you said. “Is this place new?”

“Sort of,” Sam looked around to make sure no one was near and leaned closer. “Caesar isn’t from here.” What the hell did that mean?

“Come again? Like he’s not American.” He glared at you before rolling his eyes.

“No, like not from Earth.”

“He’s an alien?!” You half shouted in surprise. Sam put his hand over your mouth, still glaring at you. You pulled his hand off. “You just told me a man isn’t from Earth, how did you expect me to react?”

“With a little more respect and dignity,” you punched him playfully. “Besides he’s not an alien, he’s a Skrull,” you stared at him, head tilted to the side. “Oh my god,” he pinched the bridge of his nose. “Skrulls are shapeshifters and their planet was destroyed so until Fury and Carol can find them a new home, they are living here,” you frowned.

“Why can’t they just live here?” You asked.

“Because humans aren’t known to accept those who are different,” Rhodey said, taking off the googles. Well, you knew that firsthand. “Do you want a turn?” He asked you.

“Uh maybe I’ll watch Sam then I’ll go.” While Sam was taking his turn, you went to get drinks from Caesar’s daughter. Her name was Jasmine and you liked her, her smile was infectious but you couldn’t help but watch the father-daughter duo. If anyone but Sam told you they weren’t human, you would think they were crazy. You guessed that was the problem with the world you lived in, some people had to hide their true selves just to survive.

“Alright, kid, batter up,” Sam said, handing you the VR set. You smiled, taking it from him. Oh, you wished you could make the world a better place.

*

While Sam and Rhodey were waiting to get their pizza from Jasmine, you were sitting at one of the empty high tops and eating away at one of the cheese slices. You tried to wait for the two Avengers but the smell was making your stomach growl. “I know you,” Caesar said, walking over to you as you sipped on your blue Gatorade. You stared at the man as he sat in the empty chair next to you. You hopped he knew you, you spent like 2 hours at his fine establishment. “Hey,” he stuck his finger at you. “Your that teenager that can cast spells and shit.” You blinked at him.

“You mean conduct electricity.” He snapped his fingers.

“That’s the one,” he tapped his fingers against the table and looked at you then to the Avengers. “People are talking about you.”

“Me?” You questioned. “Whose talking about me?”

“The type of people you ain’t want talking,” Oh. Well, that sort of answered your question. “Look, kid, something ain’t right. People are talking, then disappearing, and ol’Caesar is just trying to run a business, you hear?”

“Why are you telling me this and not the two Avengers behind you?” You hissed, leaning closer to him.

“Hey, watch the attitude, short stuff,” you leaned back in your chair, mouth slightly open. “Just because I listen don’t mean I know what’s going on,” you rolled your eyes. “My advice is keep your ears open and listen. Maybe you can figure out what’s going on before everything goes to shit.” He mumbled the last part and left before Sam and Rhodey joined you.

“Don’t listen to anything that nut job rambles about,” Rhodey said. “He’s got a few screws loose.” You smiled, giggling slightly. But what he said rattled you to your bones. What the hell was going on?

*

Caesar was saying goodbye to Sam and told him to not be a stranger. Your eyes wandered to the small arcade they had. There was a crane game filled with small rubber ducks. You walked over to it and looked at all the different duck variations - one was dressed like a police officer, and another had a book. But one that caught your eye was a duck wearing a green jersey with a soccer ball. It looked familiar. There was a memory deep within you but everything you tried to grab onto it slipped out of your fingers like water or smoke, the longer you stared at the dumb duck. “Hey, kid,” Rhodey said. “Are you ready?” You nodded, walking over to him.

“Bye Caesar,” you waved as Rhodey held open the door for you.

“See you around, short stuff,” you rolled your eyes and walked to the car.

“Short stuff, eh?” Rhodey teased. He got into the driver’s seat. You huffed, buckling into the back.

“Don’t even start,” he laughed as Sam finally got into the passenger seat.

“Sorry about that. Caesar likes to talk,” you giggled and Rhodey started the drive back home.

*

“That was a lot of fun,” you said to Sam as you exited the elevator to the common floor. “We should do that again.” Your smile faltered as Bucky turned around from his conversation with Maria. The color drained from his face as if he were looking at a ghost. He left without another word to you, Sam, or Maria.

“Okay,” Maria slowly said. “I wasn’t done talking to him.” You sighed.

“Not your fault, kid,” Sam smiled, resting his hand on your shoulder. “He just needs to get out of his head. I’ll go talk to him.” Before he turned to leave, he reached into this pocket and handed you a rubber duck. The same one you were looking at. Before you could say anything, he smiled and left.

“What was that about?” She questioned. You looked at the duck and put it in your pocket.

“It’s a long story,” you said. “Do you want the spark-notes version of the story?” She nodded. So, you gave her a short-handed version of the story you gave to the other Avengers. It was surprisingly easier.

“Shit,” you said. “I missed one hell of a party.” You rolled your eyes with a smile. “So,” she leaned back in her chair. “A little spider told me that I’m going to be training you. Are you thinking about joining this ragtag group? Fury said you did well in Overwatch .” You shrugged, tracing the random designs on the table.

“I don’t know,” you said. You weren’t against being an Avenger, maybe in a year or two but right now you weren’t ready. “I just want to get my powers under control so I don’t hurt myself or anyone else.” Maria smiled.

“I can help with that but I’m not gonna go easy on you just because you are Romanoff’s kid,” it wasn’t the first time someone at the tower referred to you as Natasha’s or Wanda’s kid but every time a warm feeling spread across your body. Your parents were never proud of you. They barely gave you enough to survive.

“I expect nothing less,” you said. “Can you teach me how to shoot a gun?”

“Stop asking people that,” Natasha said before Maria could answer. The Black Widow appeared behind you. You pouted which caused her to roll her eyes.

“Awe come on Nat,” Maria said. “Let the kid learn how to shoot. Are you afraid she’ll be better than you?” Natasha ruffled your hair.

“Yeah,” she deadpanned. “That’s exactly why I don’t want her shooting a gun,” you pushed her hand away and fixed your hair. “But we can teach her how to be safe around one.”

“How about we stop talking about me like I’m not here?” Maria hushed you.

“I’m wheeling and dealing for your benefit so hush,” she teased. You stuck out your tongue at her. Maria gasped. “Do you want to start training right now?”

“Children,” Natasha warned. “No fighting on the common floor. The last time a fight broke out we needed a new TV and a couch,” you giggled. “Come on, kid. Tony wants to have a meeting about your schooling.” You nodded. “We’ll figure out a training schedule that won’t conflict with her classes.” She said to Maria.

“Aye, aye captain,” she gave the Black Widow a salute. You smiled at the interaction.

“See you around, Maria,” you said and followed Natasha to Tony’s lab where Wanda was already there. You weren’t nervous. The test was the hard part of all of this and they were proud of how you did. But it was nice having the couple on either side of you as Tony rattled off a plan. The textbooks you needed were already ordered, minus a math textbook that he already had, and if you needed additional books for essays or projects he gave you a debit card to buy them. You didn’t bother putting up a fight with that. As for your ‘teachers’, Vision was going to help you with history, Bruce and Tony were for math and science, and your training with Maria counted as your physical education credit. The extracurricular would be business with Pepper and art with Steve, the two agreed to shadow you during those times. It seemed like a lot of work but you were ready to finally go to school and learn.

*

You had to get out of the tower. Every room you entered and Bucky so happened to be there, he left. It was a little maddening. So, you sat on the balcony with a textbook in your lap and the rubber duck in your hand. There was a part of you that was associating this duck with Bucky. But that couldn’t be correct. “Hi,” you spun around to see Steve walking over to you and hiding the duck underneath the book. You smiled at the blonde and looked at the book. You figured he was here to talk about Bucky. God, it felt like when you first moved to the tower. Instead of you running away, it was him. Steve sighed and sat down next to you. “Beautiful view,” he said, looking towards the city. “What are you doing up here?”

“Just reading,” you gestured to the book in your lap. It wasn’t the full truth but it got the point across.

“It’s about Buck, right?”

“I just don’t want him to be uncomfortable in his home,” you shrugged.

“It’s your home too,” he sat down next to you. That was true. You tapped your fingers on the page you were reading.

“He was here first,” Steve nodded and put his arms on the back of the chair. He didn’t continue the conversation so you went back to reading about ration language and how it was used to describe the association between two or more qualities. You were learning that you did not like math.

“Do you blame him for what he did to you?” Steve broke the silence. The question made you look up at the city. “It’s okay if do. The whole situation is so complicated. Complicated. That was one word that barely touched the surface to describe the relationship you had with Bucky Barnes.

“I don’t,” you softly said. You saw the super solider look away from the city but you kept your eyes trained on the skyline. “At first I did but we were both just trying to survive. It’s not our fault that some of the world is evil and we were subjected to it.” Steve chuckled and you looked at him.

“You’ve changed so much from that little girl that Wanda and Natasha brought to the tower,” he said while standing up.

“Wait, is that a good thing?” You asked.

“Yeah,” he kissed the top of your head. “A very good thing.”

*

As night fell on the tower, everyone seemed to be asleep except you and the former Winter Solider. His back was to you so he didn’t see you, which didn’t give him a chance to run away. “Do you want some hot chocolate?” The soldier jumped and spun around to look at you. “Don’t run from me, please,” you pleaded. You heard him sigh and stand up to join you in the kitchen. He sat on the island with his hands folded on the counter. You began the process of making the hot chocolate in silence. But you noticed he wasn’t looking at you, he stared at his hands as if he was afraid he was going to snap and hurt you. When the hot chocolate was done and topped with marshmallows and cinnamon, you pushed his mug over to him. He wouldn’t take it. You sipped on yours. “Are you okay, Bucky?” You asked. “I want to help but I can’t if you don’t tell me what I can do.”

“How can you be in the same room as me?” He softly asked. “After everything, I did to you.”

“That wasn’t you,” you simply said, sipping on your hot chocolate.

“I could have killed you,” he finally looked at you. Since last night, Bucky wouldn’t allow you to get this close to him. His eyes were bloodshot.

“No,” you firmly said. “The Winter Solider almost killed me. Bucky Barnes would never.” You held his stare, blue eyes locked onto yours until he looked away. “How much do you remember about our time together?” You asked. Bucky sighed.

“It comes and goes,” he said. “Like waves, crashing into me and I’m drowning.” You smiled, tracing the rim of your mug. The marshmallows were melted and stuck to your finger.

“Me too,” you admitted. “It wasn’t all bad.” You licked the marshmallow off your finger and put your hand in your pocket. “My brain clouded all the good with the bad. Do you want to hear one of the good ones?”

“Yes,” he whispered. “Please.” You smiled.

“I hadn’t seen you for a few days and I knew better than to ask about you because that resulted in a punishment,” he chuckled slightly. “One day I was brought into a room and you were there. I think they wanted you to train me and you did but I hurt my shoulder. I tried to hide my tears but you knelt at my level, whipped away my tears, and reached into your pocket,” you mimicked this part of your story and held out your hand. “And when you opened it, there was a little rubber duck.” You showed him the duck.

“What?” He questioned. “A rubber duck?” You smiled as the confusion was all over his face. “You’re making this up.”

“I’m not,” you laughed at the deadpanned look he was giving you. “I swear! Look I was equally confused when you handed it to me. It was a rubbed duck just like this one,” you placed it on the counter between you and him. When your laughter died down, your smile became sad. “When I destroyed the faculty, I tried to find it but it was destroyed in the fire.” Finally, he took a sip of his no longer hot chocolate and picked up the duck with his flesh hand.

“I need time to process the new memories,” you nodded.

“I got nothing but time,” you said. “I’ll be here when you’re ready.”

“Thank you,” he smiled. “For the talk and the hot chocolate.”

“Of course,” you cleaned your mug. “Try to get some sleep. Good night.”

“Night, doll,” he said. But you knew sleep wasn’t going to be an option for you. Every time you closed your eyes, your past played out in front of you. It was like Yelena said, there was a scab over a wound you had and although it was healing every time you rubbed against it it hurt more. Your feet led you to the training area, and the sound of your footsteps echoed against the quiet room. It was weird being here when no one else was here. You could do anything without the watchful eyes of the Avengers. You could train, lift some weights, or go for a run. Instead, you walked over to the machine Tony and Bruce built you.

It was in the corner of the room, a white sheet over it that you took off and stared at the machine. Fingertips tracing every part of it. With a sigh, you took a few steps from it and faced the machine. You closed your eyes and let out a few deep breaths. When you open your eyes, you let out of stream of electricity towards the target. You only cut it off when the batteries were full but it wasn’t enough. So you replaced the full batteries with empty ones and did it again. And again. And again. Until your chest was heaving and your legs felt like jello. A yawn escaped your lips and you took it as your sign to be done. You recovered the machine and took a long walk back to your room.

As soon as your head hit the pillow, you fell into a dreamless sleep.

_

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You, Me, and the Sky Above

Pairing: old!Bucky x old!f!reader

Summary: R has been married to Bucky for several decades, the two old and grey together with children, grandchildren and great grandchildren of their own. What happens when they pass away in the arms of the other?

Warnings: mentions of death, fluff, female pet names

As I laid in bed attempting to fall asleep, I could tell my time was approaching quickly. I knew for a while that I didn’t have much longer being 96 years old. My precious husband, Bucky, had always taken care of me but now I know he won’t have to worry his heart anymore about making sure I’m okay. I can finally rest knowing my life was filled to the brim with joy.

“You alright, doll?” Bucky asked softly as he entered our bedroom.

I opened my eyes to look at him, tears filling them as a smile formed on my face. “More than. I hope you know how much I love you, James.”

As we slept that night, he held me in his arms for what neither of us knew would be the last time. I dreamt of my life; all the memories I’ve made on my own and with my own family.

I opened my eyes to a beautiful scenery. Sunny, bright skies, lush green grass, vibrant colors. And him.

“There’s my beautiful wife…just you, me, and the sly above” Bucky said.

“My God…Look at you, handsome. You look just like you did when we met all those years ago.” I told him with a grin, walking over to him happily.

“I can say the same about you, my dear.” He said, pulling me into a loving kiss.

“What do we do now?” I asked softly, missing my children deeply.

“We wait to welcome our own miracles to this beautiful place. In the meantime, There’s some people you’ll be happy to see.” He told me, taking my hand and leading me toward a beautiful home.

“When did you pass, honey?” I asked, curious as to how long he had been here without me.

“Not long after we went to bed. At least you were in my arms.” He told me, caressing my face gently.

When the door opened, I was greeted by several familiar faces. In front of me stood Sam, Steve, Bruce, Natasha, Maria, Tony, Rhodey, Happy, Scott, Hope, Sarah, Nick, and Yelena.

“Oh my gosh… You’re all here..” Tears filled my eyes quickly as I went to them all, pulling them into hugs that have been missed for several years.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Years passed as Bucky and I made Heaven our home with all our closest friends. It was like getting to experience a whole new life together.

A knock sounded on our front door as we read together in the living room. Upon opening the door, we were greeted by our eldest daughter.

“Rebecca! Oh my goodness, my dear! Your father and I have missed you so much.” I said, hugging her tightly.

“I’m finally home, mommy..” She replied with tears and a smile.

“You, me, your father, and the sky above… forever and always.”

Mom, Dad, I’m…

Wanda Maximoff x R

Blackhill ; Bishova ; Stony ; BuckySam

Happy Pride Angels, 🌈❤️

Warnings: Attempts at Humor. Heteros.

"Detka, can you go get some tomatoes from the garden? Steve already ate all of the freaking salsa," Wanda grumbled dramatically, falling into your arms as you were mid conversation with Natasha and Maria about their work.

"He probably intended to bottom tonight," Natasha remarks with a shit stirring grin, you cackled in solidarity, but the both of you stopped when your wives stood shoulder to shoulder with a menacing tilt to their heads.

——

"Welp, those tomatoes aren't gonna pick themselves," you noted before running off, you avoided looking back, afraid to see Natasha's stony glare as you abandoned her with them.

Every man for themselves a mantra you live by, well, only when it comes to angry spouses. As an Avenger you were as selfless as the rest, but now you got to be more selfish in retirement.

Natasha, unfortunately, was your victim.

When you entered the massive greenhouse you took a second to admire your wives handiwork. The brunette had a knack for gardening, a green thumb if you will. The greenhouse was her go to place to find her zen after a day of dealing with you, Billy, Tommy, and Ella.

The witch loved you all, her beautiful family, but some days the lot of you made her feel a tad bit homicidal. On those days she gardened.

It wasn't hard to find the tomatoes, they were ripe and ready on a set of entangled vines. But before you could bring it to her, you were too enamored by the conversation your kids were having in their little cove behind the garden.

"I can't do it," Tommy groaned. "Yeah they just won't understand," Morgan Stark agreed with him, and you leaned in to hopefully garner more context for their troubled minds.

"At least Uncle Tony is bi," Raina Belova countered, "He'll be more understanding."

"Have you met our dad?" Anthony, the only Jr present, said in an incredulous manner. "He even claims Fido is gay, he's totally unhinged."

You had to put a hand over your mouth, the amusement you were experiencing was unreal.

"Couldn't be us," Elena teased, "I'm gay as hell, and Bryce here is both queer and nonbinary."

Oh goodness... Never in your days did you expect your kids to keep secrets from you, but for it to be such a silly one it honestly made you want to interrupt the conversation at hand.

To remind them that no matter what, you'd all continue to love them, but it was too funny.

"Mama is going to be mad," Celeste Belova added, "She always said being gay is the way."

"I thought she was ace?" Billy inquired. "She is, but that doesn't make her any less gay."

After the conversation moved on to who they were crushing on you snuck back to the party. The overall consensus being that every last one of your collective brood, besides your youngest, Ella, who was only five, and Natasha and Maria's powerful duo, said they're straight.

"Where have you been?" You ignored your wife, handing her the basket of ingredients while calling all of your friends to the dining room. Tony whined, "What is so important?"

"You guys will not believe what I just heard..."

Wanda rolled her eyes as you spun your tale, she chopped up the tomatoes, jalapeños and onions as you enamored the group of friends.

"Thank God we're safe," Maria teased, turning to her wife with a genuinely relieved smile. "Right? Can you imagine having to attend two straight weddings? And pretend to like it?"

"Oh jeez," you gasped, "I didn't think of that."

Wanda tossed the ingredients into a bowl as the lot of you bantered back and forth, her patience already running thin with you all.

"Y/N, this joke isn't funny." Yelena shook her head in defiance when you reminded her that this wasn't a joke. "You don't know what you are talking about. Must be hearing loss..."

Kate put a hand on her wife's shoulder, "It's true Lena, they've both told me already."

"You traitor!" Yelena ripped her arm away as if the raven haired woman had burned her skin.

You now worried that you'd inspired divorces.

"No," Tony gasped, shaking his head in fear as the unexpected reality set in. "You're lying, you have to be. No son of mine is straight!"

"Honey," Steve called out for him, "It'll be okay, we always knew it would be a possibility."

"It most certainly is not okay," he grimaced, then in a flash he was outside, calling for your children to gather around the hibachi station.

"Where's the fire pops?" Morgan jests, but quickly zips her lips as she sees her dad looking as if he was on the verge of a breakdown.

"Tell me Y/N's lying," he pleads, "That you're not straight, my fragile ticker can't take this."

"Tony!" Steve shrieked, "Don't use an old ailment to guilt the kids into being gay..."

"Stay out of this babe!" He growled, "As far as I am concerned they're gay. Y/N's a liar."

"Am not!" You gasped, "They're all heteros."

"Not us!" Bryce interjected. "We're queer."

"That's our precious babies," Natasha coo'd, arms opened wide for her kids to run into, and the both of their teens instantly ran at her.

Bucky and Sam had entered your backyard just as the revelation took place. You all watched as they took three steps back, baby carrier in hand as they looked to your kids as if they were all diseased. "We're just being cautious."

You snorted softly, "We understand fellas."

Wanda glared at you, but you remained unfazed for now. Too busy finding the dramatics entertaining to see the horror. Wanda saw it though, she looked out to see all of the kids wearing terrified expressions. She was about to console them, but then a fight broke out beside you, and you had to laugh.

"This is all your fault Kate Belova!" Yelena shrieked, "It was all of that organic mac and cheese you fed them when I was on missions!"

"Mac and cheese being healthy doesn't make a child straight," Kate shrieked back, hands running down her face as she realized her plans for a peaceful barbecue ended with this.

"If it had been orange they might have been more connected to the rainbow Kate!" Yelena went on, "It's like our gay power source."

"Well, with Wanda's garden the kids eat the entire rainbow and look at them, straight."

Yelena found your assistance unwelcome, "Keep out of this Y/N Maximoff. Your kids aren't all old enough to say yet, you still have a chance! Mine are all done... Stupid preteens"

"Well, that's not exactly true," you reasoned, "None of you have been to college yet, that's when you'll really know if you're gay or not."

Natasha, Yelena and Tony all nodded, they found your reasoning the most logical. It was a lot easier than accepting they're all straight.

"Okay, that's enough!" Wanda interjected, her tone terrifying, "Look at what you're doing to them. They can't help it if they're straight."

"I wanna be gay like mama," Ella murmured, clearly she just wanted to fit in with the crowd, and therefore you praised her, "Smart girl."

Wanda entered your mind with a warning, she smirked as you lifted Ella onto your hip, then you fell into unexpected silence by her side.

"Haha, you're like so whipped, "Yelena cackled.

Wanda glared at her. "You don't scare me wiggly woo, my kids being straight is enough."

"Yelena," Kate sighed, "Knock it off, and try telling the girls that you love them."

"Of course I love them," she rushed out angrily, "That's not even a question, they're moy deti."

(My babies)

Celeste and Raina ran into the blondes side, their tears of relief soaked into her shirt, and made her see they were genuinely scared this would lose them her love. "Shh, mama loves you always, even if you make dumb choices."

Tony and Steve were in a standoff of sorts, the billionaire sipped on his margarita slowly as they appeared to be having a conversation with only their eyes. Tony rolled his, but after a moment of incoherent grumbling he nodded. Morgan and Tony Jr. approached their dads after being called forward, Steve embraced them first, and wholly. Tony gave them both side hugs, and whispered that he just needed time to cope, but he loved them regardless.

Then you heard him brush by with his son, begging him to take it back, only to find out his son was in a long term relationship with a girl. That study buddy of his was so much more...

Like father, like son you suppose.

You looked out to see your boys stood side by side, Billy gripped Tommy's hand for dear life. Wanda was about to call them over, but you beat her to it as guilt overwhelmed your heart. The boys scurried over, and Wanda sent you an adoring smile as you kissed the both of their heads, and hugged them tight. "I love you," falling from all of your lips in succession.

After everyone had time to process the news, the vibe returned to one of relaxation. Wanda set up the grill for Sam, and the master chef himself began to put on a show for everyone.

Once the plates were served you all moved to the fire pit, where you talked about all you'd missed in each other's life while the younger kids sat in front of the projector playing Up.

Then, as the sun officially fell, everyone began to clear out. Saying their goodbyes at the front door, where you hugged each kid, an apology of sorts on your lip for the drama you stirred. Each one forgave you, some even thanked you for finally getting the conversation over with.

When everyone was officially gone you moved back outside to clean up. Tommy helped you, while Billy helped clean the kitchen so that Wanda could focus on Ella's bath, and bedtime.

It was an entire hours worth of work, you were beyond exhausted as you fell into the mattress. You nearly passed out without your wife, but soon enough Wanda slipped into the bed. She wore a thoughtful expression, weighing out whether to disturb you or not, but she soon reasoned you'd appreciate her words, "Detka..."

"Yes baby?" You rolled onto your side, using your elbow to prop yourself up so you could look down at her. She looked to you with a warm smile, then she was yawning, "Don't worry." She paused to pull you into her arms before whispering in your ear: "Billy was not being honest. We do indeed have a gay son."

You laughed so hard tears streamed down your face and pooled in the crook of your equally as amused wife's neck. That was the last thing you expected to hear from her, if anything you had anticipated a continuation of her scolding.

"I'll scold you more tomorrow," she teased, "But for now, we should get some sleep."

——

1,844 Words

Guardian Angel

Chapter 4: Fly Me to the Moon

Summary: In your worst moment, Wanda is there for you. 

Warnings: Trigger Warning—car accident, blood, injuries, hospital, surgery.

Word Count: 3k

A/N: This was an intense chapter. 😭 Shoutout to @arlana-likes-to-write for helping me with some dialogue at the end.

Guardian Angel Masterlist

On this gloomy Friday morning, you came to the decision that if you had a superpower, it would be the ability to fly. You could effortlessly soar above the annoying traffic and get to work on time. However, the sad reality is that you are no superhero. You can barely work the defroster in your car.

This morning, you woke up to the realization that your alarm had failed to go off. You had overslept and were now rushing to get ready for work. You had to forego your usual morning routine of sipping on coffee and listening to relaxing music, which usually helped you start your day on a positive note. Instead, you took a hurried shower and got dressed as quickly as you could. You had to get out of the door as soon as possible to avoid getting stuck in the morning traffic. The rain outside only added to your sense of urgency. As you drove across town, you couldn't help but worry about getting to work on time. The Candy Bar had recently become increasingly busy, especially with the start of the holiday season. You were hesitant to leave Harper to handle the rush all by herself.

Rain lashed against your windshield. The windshield wipers whipped back and forth over the window of your black Honda Acura, attempting to clear away the large droplets clinging to the glass. Wary of the number of cars around, you gripped the steering wheel a bit tighter. As you approached the intersection of Second Avenue and Crosby Street, your traffic light turned green. You began to cross the threshold of the intersection when suddenly, a green car to your right rushed through the intersection at full speed, presumably trying to beat the red light. It happened so fast that you barely saw it coming out of the corner of your eye. You quickly slammed on the brakes and tried to turn the car to avoid a direct collision. The sound of your car's screeching brakes and tires skidding on the wet pavement shattered the silence of the street. In that split second, images of your life flashed across your mind like a slideshow. You saw yourself as a child, your high school graduation, your first day of college, and the day you opened The Candy Bar. All these moments seemed to flash before your eyes as you struggled to regain control of your car. But it was too late. Your car was struck with a tremendous force, causing it to flip once, then twice before landing upside down in the middle of the street. The last thing you remembered before the airbag deployed was the sound of shattering glass and the distant sound of cars piling up. Everything went black after that.

*^~^*

Natasha was undeterred by bad weather. She ran like clockwork every morning, converting her emotional pain into miles covered. She had a warrior spirit that never quit and knew that training was the key to success. Even off the clock, her training stayed with her, making her more alert, confident, and always on the lookout for vulnerabilities.

Maria was better at compartmentalization. Outside of work, a run was a run. That’s why when they both awoke this morning to the relaxing sound of rain, she was keen to skip the run and cuddle in bed with Nat just a bit longer. Unfortunately, she did not win that argument. Which is how she found herself running down the street next to her better half in the rain; hoodie pulled tight over her head. The soundtrack of their morning was the splish splash of their running shoes as they pounded through the puddles that had formed along their usual route. 

"Let's go one more block, and then we'll head back," Natasha shouted over the sound of the rain.

"Thank God," Maria whispered.

“What was that, malyshka?”

"Sure thing, sweetheart!" Maria replied, giving a thumbs up.

As you approached the intersection of Second Avenue and Crosby Street, your traffic light turned green. You began to cross the threshold of the intersection when suddenly, a green car to your right rushed through the intersection at full speed, presumably trying to beat the red light. It happened so fast that you barely saw it coming out of the corner of your eye. You quickly slammed on the brakes and tried to turn the car to avoid a direct collision. The sound of your car's screeching brakes and tires skidding on the wet pavement shattered the silence of the street.

In the midst of a peaceful moment, a sudden, piercing screech shattered the tranquility. The two women turned their attention to the source of the noise and were met with the terrifying sight of a black car hydroplaning wildly out of control through the intersection nearby. Their breaths caught in their throats as they watched in horror as a green car, careening recklessly from the opposite direction, slammed into the driver's side door of the spinning vehicle. The black car was sent flying, rolling twice before coming to a rest upside down in the center of the street. The sickening sound of metal bending and glass shattering echoed eerily through the rain-slicked air as multiple cars piled up behind it, as if they had all hit an invisible brick wall.

"Call it in!" yelled Maria.

*^~^*

After dropping her boys off at school, Wanda pulled into her driveway when a call came through on her Bluetooth. She quickly answered the call from FRIDAY's interface, displaying the compound's number.

“Ms. Maximoff, there has been a multi-vehicle accident approximately 2.3 miles from your current location. There are possible fatalities and multiple injuries. The team is on the way and requires your assistance.”

“On my way.”

As soon as Wanda landed on the scene, she could see chaos all around her. Bruce, who had already arrived, was frantically setting up triage to tend to the injured while Maria was busy establishing a secure perimeter to keep the bystanders at a safe distance. The sound of distant sirens could be heard in the background, growing louder with each passing moment, as emergency services rushed to the scene. Onlookers had gathered, their faces etched with worry and fear, as they watched the unfolding events with a mix of shock and disbelief.

“Where do you need me?” 

That car took the worst of it,” Natasha interjected, pointing to the overturned black car in the intersection. “See if you can help Stark with the driver!” 

Wanda sprinted to the scene and arrived at the car just as Tony touched down, quickly scanning for a heat signature.

“One occupant. Female, early 30s, multiple injuries, vital signs thready,” FRIDAY read.

Wanda crouched down to ground level and tried to peer through the broken window. Droplets of water ran down her skin making it difficult to see. Her breath left her body as she finally took in the sight in front of her. You were still strapped into the driver's seat, the airbag deflated in front of you like an old balloon. Blood was trickling slowly down the side of your bruised and battered face. Wanda stood up and frantically tried to pull open the upside-down door, but the frame was bent badly out of alignment. 

"Whoa, Red! What are you doing? There's a safer way," Tony shouted.

“I know her!” 

A repulsor ray from Iron Man’s hand quickly cut through the hinge of the car door. Wanda reached inside and unbuckled you from the seat. A trail of blood followed you across the pavement as she carefully slid your unconscious body from the car.

“Don’t do this to me, y/n. I can still feel you.” 

Sam rushed over and applied pressure to your stomach wound, his military training kicking in.

“I got this Wanda. Cap and Bucky need your help.”

The redhead looked over to see two super soldiers working to pry twisted metal apart in order to free other drivers from their cars. She then glanced back down at you, her breathing uneven as she hesitated, not wanting to leave your side.

"Friday, please contact the nearest Level One Trauma Center and inform them of the situation," Tony instructed.

“Go!” Sam exclaimed.

Wanda's powers sprang into action, swiftly clearing the debris from the center of the pile-up and creating a path for Steve and Bucky to reach the other victims. The relentless rain showed no signs of letting up, and it was causing water to collect around the wreckage. After what felt like an eternity, Wanda finally made her way back to you, deftly navigating through the maze of broken and battered cars. As she approached, she could see that you were still lying motionless on the ground, a few feet from your vehicle. Meanwhile, Sam and Yelena were working frantically to save you. Sam was applying pressure to your abdominal wound, while Yelena was administering CPR. However, they were so focused on keeping you alive that they failed to notice the fuel leaking from your gas tank. Wanda, on the other hand, could see the puddle forming near them on the ground, and she knew that they needed to move quickly to avoid a potential disaster.

“Sam, Yelena!” she screamed.

Your car ignited in a flash of fire just as Wanda reached you again. The bright flash hit her eyes just before the force of the explosion knocked the three of them back. She acted purely on instinct, containing the explosion in a sphere of glowing red energy. Dropping to the ground in exhaustion as the blast was diffused.

"Well done," Steve praised as he helped Wanda to her feet.

"Where are the first responders, Hill?" asked Bruce.

“The rain and the pile-up are making it difficult to get through. I’m working on it.” 

“She can’t wait. We need to get her out of here now,” Sam cautioned, removing his undershirt and packing your wound.

“I’ve got a pulse,” Yelena announced.

"St. Peter’s is the closest hospital," Kate said.

“I’ll clear a path,” Clint offered. 

"No," Tony interrupted. "Take her to the compound. Get her to the MedBay. I'll notify Helen." He locked eyes with Wanda.

She looked into Tony's eyes, searching for insincerity, but found none.

“FRIDAY, run an X-ray and CT scan to assess spinal stability,” he ordered.

“The spine is stable, boss,” FRIDAY replied.

“Take her,” Tony ordered.

Wanda picked you up tenderly and vanished into the weeping grey sky. If she hastened, she could reach the compound within five minutes. Wanda prayed silently that you would hold on for that long, while tears streamed down her cheeks.

A sharp intake of breath brought you around as searing pain surged through your broken body. A mixture of blood and water hit your tastebuds. Your vision was blurry and your hair was falling wetly in front of your eyes, but you could just make out Wanda’s face staring down at you. Her eyes began to glow red, and you felt the same sense of calm wash over you as the day you met her. 

“Stay with me, y/n. We’re almost there.”

Your eyes grew heavy as you succumbed to unconsciousness once more.

*^~^*

“Concussion, ruptured spleen, two cracked ribs, shattered collarbone, collapsed lung, fractured ankle.” 

As Wanda stood there, her hands instinctively flew to her mouth, trying to suppress the gasp that threatened to escape her lips. The tears in her eyes were a clear indication of the emotions that were bubbling inside her. She couldn't bring herself to accept what she was hearing, but as Dr. Cho went on reciting the list of injuries you sustained, the harsh reality of the situation hit her like a ton of bricks.

“She’s in surgery right now. We can try to regenerate the damaged tissue with the cradle once she is stable. The nano-molecular functionality is instantaneous, but with the severity and number of injuries, it’s going to take some time. Y/N will have a long road to recovery ahead of her.”

Wanda simply nodded her head, too afraid to say anything that might cause her to break down.

“Do you know if she has any family we should notify?” 

“No, I don’t. I’m sorry,” barely above a whisper. 

“It’s going to be a long day. You look exhausted, why don’t you try and get some rest? I’ll have FRIDAY notify you when there is an update.” 

“No, no, I’ll stay. I just need to call Darcy to see if she can pick up the boys from school, but I’ll stay. I want to be here when she wakes up,” Wanda said somberly. 

Helen placed a comforting hand on Wanda’s shoulder before turning and walking back into the Operating Room. The redhead sat down on the sofa in the corner of the Med Bay, unable to process everything that had happened in the last hour. Her mind replays the image of your broken figure lying upside down and motionless in your car. She glanced down at the drops of your blood staining her shirt, the shock prevented her from feeling anything.

The sound of the rain outside continued to fill the room, as Wanda sat in the compound waiting room. Nurses and doctors walked in and out, their faces unfamiliar to her. She sat there, anxiously watching the clock, as one hour turned into two, and then three. Suddenly, a text message from Darcy lit up her phone, offering to help with the boys for as long as she needed. Wanda felt grateful for the offer, and quickly sent a reply thanking her. She took off her coat and balled it up to create a makeshift pillow. She curled up on one end of the sofa and let her gaze linger on the door of the operating room. The redhead felt her eyelids grow heavy, and soon she fell asleep within minutes, her body relaxed and at ease.

A gentle nudge on her shoulder woke Wanda after half an hour. She looked up to see Sam and Yelena standing nearby.

“Mhmm, what are you guys doing here?” She murmured. 

“We wanted to see how she was doing,” Sam said.

“Y/N”

“Y/N,” Sam repeated.

“How is she?” Yelena asked, taking a seat beside her.

I don't know," she said as she dragged her hands down her tired face. "I spoke to Helen when they first brought her into the OR, but I haven't heard anything since. She's in pretty bad shape," tears threatening to fall again. "What happened after I left the scene? Were there any casualties?

“No, thankfully.” Sam shared. There were a few other serious injuries; broken back, internal bleeding, severe whiplash. The first responders were able to get through a couple of minutes after you left. Hill wants to have a meeting with law enforcement to discuss how we can work together to improve response times.”

Wanda struggled to speak, her words catching in her throat. "Thank you for what you both did for her," she finally managed to say.

Sam placed his hand on Wanda's thigh and said, "I'll be back with a change of clothes for you."

"Can I ask how you know y/n?" Yelena asked softly once they were alone.

“… She was… is the woman I helped in the café, and I bought the candy for Billy and Tommy’s birthday from her sweet shop.”

“Does she know you have feelings for her?” 

“What are you talking about?”

"Oh, little witch. Don’t tell me you are that deep in denial?" she says, her voice laced with a mix of disbelief and concern. "We risk our lives every day to help people survive the worst moment of their lives. We are trained to do so with composure and presence of mind because otherwise, we risk letting our emotions affect our actions in the field," she continues. “You can't argue with that - it's the truth. I’ve fought alongside you for almost three years, and in all that time I’ve never seen you react the way you did today. You care for her," she says, her tone softening.

Wanda averted her gaze from Yelena, fixing it instead on an imaginary point on the dull white wall right in front of her.

“I barely know her,” Wanda sighed. “She doesn’t know me at all. Honestly, I’m not sure she should,” a single tear rolling down her cheek that she quickly wiped away.

“That is what you think, not what she thinks. Let her in. Sooner rather than later,” placing a loving hand on her arm.

"Wanda?" Helen interjected softly as she walked out of the operating room.

The redhead stood up anxiously. “Y/N is out of surgery and stable. It was touch and go at times, but she pulled through. She’s still under, but you can go sit with her if you’d like. Room 4”

“Thank you, Helen. Thank you,” hugging Helen before looking back at Yelena.

“Go on, I’ll wait here.”

*^~^*

Wanda took a deep breath before opening the door to your room. The sight that greeted her was heartbreaking. Your face had bruises, and your hair was unkempt. You had a nasal cannula on your face, and there were several butterfly stitches. Your left arm was in a sling, and your right leg was in a cast below the knee, propped up gently on a pillow.

Despite your physical appearance, you looked peaceful. If it weren't for the steady beep of the heart rate monitor, she might've thought you were only sleeping. The redhead took a seat at your bedside, unable to take her eyes off you. Wanda could hardly believe she was sitting here. Three weeks ago, she didn't even know you existed. Now she was sitting in your dreary grey hospital room, praying you would wake up soon.

A young nurse walked into the room with a tablet in her hand. She recorded your vital signs and acknowledged Wanda's presence with a nod and a sympathetic smile. After leaving the room, Wanda was left alone with her anxious thoughts. She replayed your two brief encounters in her head and began to worry about your recovery. She couldn't recall you mentioning any family or significant other, which made her concerned about what your recovery would look like if it was true that you were all alone.

As you slowly started to stir, a barely audible groan broke Wanda from her trance. Hearing the sound, her head snapped in your direction. You felt heavy and broken all over your body, and when you tried to shift slightly, everything hurt. Gradually, the blinding light subsided, and you began to take in your surroundings, but you had no idea where you were or how you got there. Panic started to set in before a soft, sweet voice met your ears.

“Y/N, hey, hey… it’s okay. You’re okay. I’m right here.” grasping your hand.

You turned your head and saw Wanda's beautiful green eyes.

“Wanda?” Tears form in your eyes. “What happened? Where am I? What are you—?” Your raspy voice cracked and set you into a coughing fit. Wanda reached across your body and grabbed a cup of water sitting on the bedside table. Helping you to sit up slowly, she held the cup to your lips as you took small sips. She rubbed gentle circles on your back as the coughing subsided and your lungs relaxed.

“Easy, easy.. that’s it,” helping you lay back down. “You were in a car accident, y/n, but you’re going to be okay, I promise. You’re in the MedBay. It’s the hospital wing of the Avengers compound.” You stared at her for a few moments. Your brain was fuzzy, and you were having trouble understanding everything she was saying to you, “Avengers comp—what?” your voice hoarse and tired.

“I’ll get Dr. Cho,” reaching for your call button. 

"No, no wait just wait," she did. She said you were in the Avengers compound but that means-no that's impossible. You couldn’t believe you hadn’t recognized her before. "You're an Avenger," you said slowly, her green eyes cast downwards to avoid looking at you. "Right?" You questioned when her silence wasn't a good enough answer. "That's the only way they would allow me in here."

"I am," she finally spoke but her eyes remained trained on the ground. "But I didn't want you to find out." You were a little taken aback by her confession. The stories that surrounded the Avengers were nothing short of heroic. 

"Why wouldn't you want me to find out?" You questioned, voice barely above a whisper. "Being an Avenger is amazing. You are a hero. You-" you trailed off as you watched the woman sink into herself. "Wanda, why didn't you want me to know?" Sighing, she bit her lip and looked up at you. 

"Does the town of Westview, New Jersey mean anything to you?" 

*Chapter 5 coming soon*

Bucky: *Sneaking out of Clint's room*

Sam: *Sneaking out of Steve's room*

Bucky and Sam: *Freeze and stare at each other*

Sam: What are you doing?

Bucky: What are YOU doing?

Sam: That’s Clint's room

Bucky: That’s Steve's room

Maria: *Sneaking out of Natasha's room and freezes when she sees Bucky and Sam staring at her*

Maria, Bucky, and Sam: *All awkwardly staring at each other*

Maria: …You never saw me. I never saw you.

Bucky and Sam: Agreed.

Bitches, help, so like I'm writing a book called the widow. And girl is getting no where, sooo like can my local marvel fans check it out. I'm busy with chapter 3 currently and it's going in order from all Avengers movies, and the side tracks like CATWD and CACW, even iron man 2 . - starts off with that kinda.

Might be adding characters who aren't in the Avengers movies. But from other movies. Like Thor love and thunder. Or the marvels, but all will fall within the proper plot

But yeahhh

Endgame (Chapter Ten)

Summary: Following the funeral to honor Tony and Natasha, Steve volunteers to return all six Infinity Stones to their original timelines and makes a surprising decision.

Pairing: Steve Rogers X Reader

Word Count: 6.3k

Warnings/Disclaimers: None

A/N: This is sad, ya’ll, there’s no way to sugar-coat that lol but things will lighten up a little towards the end of the chapter so hang in there! Thank you for reading, I hope you all enjoy!

Chapter Ten One Week Later… (Previous Chapter)

The funeral was held on a beautiful autumn afternoon, on the banks of the lake bordering the Stark family’s eco-compound. There were only thirty-eight people in attendance, as per Pepper’s insistence; she only trusted the small number of people who knew Tony best to be around Morgan, who was understandably distraught and confused by the sudden loss of her father. Following the instructions given to her by Natasha, (Y/N) reached out to her best friend’s adoptive family and informed them of her death, but Alexei and Melina informed her that they wouldn’t come without Yelena, who was inconsolable with grief and unable to face her sister’s funeral. All across the world, people were celebrating the return of their loved ones and mourning the loss of Iron Man and Black Widow but there on the secluded eco-compound, friends, teammates and allies came together to mourn Tony Stark and Natasha Romanoff.

While the other funeral attendees stood outside in the crisp October sunshine and distracted themselves with stilted small talk, a small gathering was taking place inside the farmhouse. Thor was leaning a shoulder against one of the living room support columns, Bruce was hunched over near the kitchen to avoid hitting his head on the low ceiling and (Y/N) stood between Steve and Clint while Pepper, Morgan, Happy and Rhodes were seated around the coffee table, upon which an Iron Man helmet sat and projected a recorded hologram of its inventor; before the time heist, Tony had seemingly taken the same precaution that Natasha had and recorded a final message to his family and close friends, and Pepper wanted to wait and watch it until they were all gathered together.

(Y/N)’s eyes welled with tears as Tony’s message began to play. She still couldn’t quite believe that she’d never hear her friend call her ‘Austen’ again, the silly but inexplicably heartwarming nickname he’d bestowed upon her the moment they first met, or have a chance to fully reconnect with him in the wake of Siberia and Thanos’ Snap. With that being said, the brief time she’d known the billionaire was time that she’d treasure and never forget, and she was truly honored to have known the man behind the hero.

“Everybody wants a happy ending, right? But it doesn’t always roll that way…maybe this time. I’m hoping if you play this back, it’s in celebration. I hope families are reunited-” (Y/N)’s eyes briefly flicked over to Carina, napping peacefully near the window in her floating pram. “-I hope we get it back, and something of a normal version of the planet is restored. If there ever was such a thing…” The hologram of Tony shook his head in amazement and smiled. “God, what a world. Universe, now. If you told me ten years ago that we weren’t alone, let alone, you know, to this extent? I mean, I wouldn’t have been surprised, but come on, you know? The epic forces of darkness and light that have come to play…and, for better or worse, that’s the reality Morgan’s gonna have to find a way to grow up in. So, I thought I’d probably better record a little greeting in the case of an untimely death – on my part – I mean, not that death at any time isn’t untimely. This time travel thing that we’re gonna try and pull off tomorrow, it’s got me scratching my head about the survivability of it all. That’s the thing. Then again, that’s the hero gig; part of the journey is the end.” He scoffed at himself before standing from his chair and moving towards the camera. “What am I even trippin’ for? Everything’s gonna work out exactly the way it’s supposed to.” The hologram of Tony leaned down to stop the recording, his sudden smile seemingly aimed at his red-eyed daughter cuddled up to his wife’s side. “I love you 3,000.”

The message suddenly ended and the hologram faded away into nothing as the farmhouse full of mourners took a moment to wipe their tears away and compose themselves. (Y/N) took a steadying breath before turning towards Steve and adjusting the crooked knot of his black tie for him, murmuring under her breath so that only he could hear her words. “Are you okay, Steve?”

Her husband nodded but remained silent, wiping away some of the tears that managed to escape his eyes while she gently smoothed out the nonexistent wrinkles of his suit’s lapels. (Y/N) witnessed Steve mourn far too many losses over the years, but the loss of Tony and Natasha seemed to affect him on an entirely different level; she wondered if it was because they were among the first people he’d befriended after coming out of the ice into an unrecognizable world, or if it was because he somehow found a way to blame himself for their loss, but it was clear to her that he wasn’t ready to talk about it yet. Distractions helped – the super-soldier was more than busy organizing the secure clean-up of the Avengers Facility wreckage and spending his spare time finally bonding with their infant daughter – but Tony and Natasha’s losses remained constant on his mind. Hopefully today will bring him a sense of closure, (Y/N) thought as she slipped her hand into his and gave it a comforting squeeze, will bring us all a sense of closure.

“Pepper’s ready to begin.” She turned to see Clint, who was holding the wreath they’d worked on together in Natasha’s memory; it was an arrangement made from the wildflowers that grew in the field behind the Barton’s barn, and at its center were the spy’s crossed batons they’d retrieved from the battlefield. The archer’s eyes were rimmed in red but he mustered up a small smile for them both as he offered her the wreath. “I know I said I’d lay it with you, (Y/L/N), but I…I-I just…”

(Y/N) nodded in understanding and accepted the wreath with her free hand. “It’s okay, Clint. I’ll do it for the both of us.” He swallowed thickly, giving her a chaste kiss on the forehead and exiting the farmhouse to stand with his family outside. As Rhodes and Happy followed Pepper and Morgan out onto the wraparound porch, (Y/N) brought hers and Steve’s joined hands up and gave his knuckles a reassuring kiss before following after them.

Walking down the porch steps and along the path that led to the dock, (Y/N) took the opportunity to study the impressive gathering of heroes around her. Clint and Laura Barton’s arms were wrapped around Cooper and Lila’s shoulders, and Laura’s fingers soothingly carded through little Nathaniel’s shaggy brown hair; Peter Parker’s eyes were red with grief and he was trying in vain not to cry as his Aunt May rested a consoling hand on his arm; Stephen Strange and Wong stood together, but the doctor’s gaze was diligently trained on his polished dress shoes and there was something almost akin to guilt written across his face; Hank Pym and Janet Van Dyne stood alongside their daughter Hope and Scott, the former rival of Howard Stark putting aside their personal history to pay respect to his fallen son; the Guardians of the Galaxy looked slightly out of place amongst the other attendees, but they – particularly Rocket and Nebula – appeared genuinely sorrowful for the loss of Tony and Natasha; T’Challa, Shuri and Okoye watched their procession with saddened eyes, the three of them all too familiar with the pain of loss; Sam and Wanda stood beside Bucky, who only came after (Y/N) and Steve convinced him that he deserved to attend despite what the Winter Soldier had done to Tony’s parents; a teenage boy around Peter’s age hovered near the back of the gathering – according to Pepper, Tony had been his mentor from a young age and even provided him with a scholarship so he could attend MIT – and behind him stood Carol, the captain’s hands clasped together as she gave the procession a nod of respect; Secretary Ross, Maria Hill and Nick Fury stood the farthest away, with the Secretary of State avoiding the pointed glares that the other two were giving him.

The attendees gathered along the grassy shore of the lake and watched as (Y/N) and Steve followed Pepper and Morgan onto the dock. When they reached its end, the older woman crouched down beside her daughter and they both gently placed their wildflower wreath onto the calm water; the first iteration of Tony’s arc reactor was affixed to its center and the sun reflected off its metal, which was etched with the playful words ‘Proof That Tony Stark Has A Heart.’ With Steve’s assistance, (Y/N) lowered herself and – ignoring the twinges of pain caused by the pull on her many stitches – laid Natasha’s wreath onto the water beside Tony’s. The four of them stood at the end of the dock and watched the wreaths slowly drift away and as (Y/N)’s free hand fiddled with the black fabric of her dress, a random memory of Natasha forcing her to wear her Boyz II Men shirt to the U.N. instead of her mourning dress came to mind and she couldn’t help but smile fondly to herself. Her eyes remained trained on the two floating wreaths as she quietly hummed one of the R&B group’s more emotional ballads under her breath and thought about all those they’d lost in the years-long fight against Thanos.

“How do I say goodbye to what we had? The good times that made us laugh outweigh the bad…”

When they first met, Tony welcomed her into the Avengers Tower with open arms and from then on, he always treated her as a friend, even during the complicated events revolving around the Sokovia Accords. His laughter was infectious, his constant jokes and nicknames were accepted with loving exasperation, and his loyalty to his friends and family was something that (Y/N) always admired greatly about the self-proclaimed genius-billionaire-playboy-philanthropist.

“I thought we’d get to see forever, but forever’s gone away. It’s so hard to say goodbye to yesterday…”

Vision was a gentle soul and while the other Avengers found it difficult to converse with the thoughtful android, (Y/N) loved hearing his thoughts on history and literature. They bonded over their shared worry for Steve and Wanda whenever they’d embark on missions together, and Vision trusted her enough to begin asking her about how human emotions – specifically, the ones centering around romance – worked. He was brave in the face of overwhelming danger, his capacity for kindness was second to none, and (Y/N) hated that Wanda was suffering under the loss of such a wonderful person.

“I don’t know where this road is going to lead. All I know is where we’ve been and what we’ve been through…”

(Y/N)’s friendship with Loki was as unexpected as it was exceptional. Not only had they been forced to work together to survive on a hostile alien planet, but the God of Mischief helped her give birth to Carina and protected them both from harm, showing (Y/N) a softer side of him that few others had ever had the privilege of seeing. Beneath the dark façade he used to scare others away, he was truly heroic and for as long as she lived, she would never forget how he saved her daughter’s life and lost his own in a desperate but brave attempt to save the universe from a threat he knew all too well.

“And if we get to see tomorrow, I hope it’s worth all the wait. It’s so hard to say goodbye to yesterday…”

Although she’d never had the opportunity to meet Gamora, (Y/N) knew enough about the Daughter of Thanos from Rocket and Nebula’s stories to form an understanding of her. Gamora’s life before joining the Guardians of the Galaxy was filled with trauma and pain, but she proved that she possessed an empathetic heart when she abandoned her adoptive father and devoted her life to protecting the universe from him, a life that she’d come to lose in exchange for the Soul Stone. By a trick of fate, however, 2014 Gamora was with Thanos when he transported his army through their Quantum Tunnel and she was seen fleeing the battlefield shortly after helping them defeat Thanos for good; nothing could ever replace what Nebula and the other Guardians lost that day on Vormir, but (Y/N) hoped that finding that version of Gamora would help them cope.

“And I’ll take with me the memories, to be my sunshine after the rain. It’s so hard to say goodbye to yesterday…”

To (Y/N), losing Natasha was like losing a sister and she knew that for the rest of her life, she’d never stop missing the spy. But because Natasha wouldn’t want her to wallow in grief, she focused on all the happy memories they shared, from the first time they met in the National Mall and she smirked as (Y/N) teased Sam to the last smile they shared before embarking on the time heist. The night before the funeral, as she cuddled up to Steve and was soothed to sleep by his warm embrace, she decided that the best way she could honor Natasha – and everyone else who died in the fight against Thanos – was to put her skills as a writer to good use and write a book; people deserved to know the woman who sacrificed her life to save the world, and (Y/N) needed to ensure that her name would never be forgotten.

“And I’ll take with me the memories, to be my sunshine after the rain. It’s so hard to say goodbye to yesterday…”

As they watched the wreaths glide atop the lake’s steady water, (Y/N) closed her tear-filled eyes and sadly smiled.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The funeral was followed by a quiet outdoor reception and while the others chatted amongst themselves as they sampled hors d’oevres, (Y/N) sat on the porch and waited for her Tylenol pill to start kicking in; as a result of the Battle of Earth, she needed twelve stitches for the gash along her stomach, eight stitches to close the cut along her collar and two for the small wound on her right temple, and she was becoming increasingly annoyed by her slow-healing body and how weak her injuries made her feel. She kept her mind off her injuries by watching Steve interact with Morgan, Nathaniel and Lila; the super-soldier was feeding Carina her bottle and smiling as all three children fawned over the infant, and (Y/N) was pleased to see Morgan crack a tiny smile for the first time that day when their daughter’s tiny fingers wrapped around one of hers.

“Pepper sent me up here to give you this, and she said to make sure you ate all of it,” Maria remarked as she walked up the porch steps and offered her a paper plate of cheddar and broccoli mini-quiche. “I think there was some talk of ‘by any means necessary,’ but I can’t be too sure.”

(Y/N) chuckled. “I guess it’s a good thing I’m hungry.” Thanking the agent, she took the plate of food and placed it on her lap. “In a few minutes, you’ll be able to report back to your boss that your mission was an overwhelming success.”

“And here I thought that I was your only boss.” Both women turned to see Nick Fury approaching them, his hands in his pockets and a pensive expression on his face. “You mind giving us a minute, Hill?” Maria nodded and patted (Y/N)’s shoulder before heading off to join Clint and Wanda standing near the dock. Fury took a seat in the empty wicker chair beside hers and while she nibbled on a quiche, he looked out at the glassy lake and sighed. “I can see why Stark moved his family up here. It’s peaceful…but one thing I’ve learned about certain kinds of people is that no matter how peaceful their surroundings are, they’ll never find satisfaction in it so long as there’s someone out there in trouble. Those are the real heroes; the ones in the position to fight the battles that most could never dream of fighting, the ones who choose to become something more…” The corner of his lips curved into a smile as he glanced sideways at her. “The ones who help save the world in any way they can and who don’t need anyone’s permission to do it.”

(Y/N) couldn’t help but snort in amusement as she recognized her own words being spoken back to her; she’d said the exact same thing to Fury over eight years earlier, right before he allowed her to join the Theta Protocol and travel to Sokovia to save its citizens from Ultron’s attack. “You’ve got a long memory, I’ll give you that. This isn’t some sort of recruitment speech, is it? Because I have to say, this is kind of an inappropriate place for one…although, you did once try and recruit me in the middle of a cemetery, so this is sort of on-par for us.”

“I’m sorry to disappoint you, Mrs. (Y/L/N), but today’s my day off.” Fury’s chuckles died off and his expression shifted into a more somber emotion. “To tell you the truth, my days of recruiting heroes might already be behind me; I always thought that finding them is the hard part, but today’s shown me that losing them for good is even harder.” (Y/N) pursed her lips and nodded as the former director watched Steve cradle a giggling Carina in his arms. “No, I’m here to offer you and Rogers the same set-up I offered the Barton’s when they decided to get married and settle down.”

Her brows shot up in surprise. “You want to give us a farm so we could live off the grid?”

“Doesn’t have to be a farm and it doesn’t have to be off the grid, just someplace far away from prying eyes where you can raise your daughter together in peace.” Reaching into his pocket, Fury withdrew a business card and placed it on the arm of her chair and stood. “Take all the time you need to talk it over with Rogers, then give me a call with your answer. It was good to see you again, Mrs. (Y/L/N).”

Fury turned and started to walk away, but didn’t make it far until (Y/N) called out, “Did you know? When we first met in that hideout in D.C., did you know what was going to happen?”

He stopped and turned back around to face her, his eye twinkling with an unknown emotion as he smiled to himself. “Natasha asked me that same question once, so I’ll tell you what I told her: you never know, you hope for the best and make do with what you get. And that’s remained constant, for the most part, but in this specific instance? I may know a lot and see even more, but not even I could predict what an unpublished historical-fiction novelist would end up bringing to the table.”

With a final nod, the former director stepped off the porch and strode across the grassy bank towards Rhodes and Pepper, leaving (Y/N) alone with her thoughts. A quiet life with Steve and Carina sounded like a dream come true, but she couldn’t quite picture what that might entail for them; after all, she was an award-winning novelist and a college professor and he was still Captain America, the Star-Spangled-Man-With-A-Plan. A quiet life wouldn’t quite come as easy to them as it had Clint and Laura Barton. And that’s without considering what Steve might be picturing for our future as a family, she thought as she slowly finished her mini-quiche and stared off at the lake.

“I think someone might be missing you, sunshine.” (Y/N) tore her gaze away from the glistening water to see Steve settling himself onto the unoccupied wicker seat beside her; Carina was beginning to fuss in his arms and (Y/N)’s arms itched to hold her, but her stitches made it difficult and she didn’t want to risk accidentally dropping her. “See, angel? Your ma’s right here.”

(Y/N) adjusted her daughter’s blanket and gave her a smile as she began to calm down. “Aw, are you getting sleepy again, lemon drop?” Carina yawned, snuggling further into Steve’s arms while her parents shared a quiet chuckle. “Must be all the fresh air here. Back before we fought Hela and saved the Asgardians from Ragnarok, I promised Cari that the three of us would go someplace warm and sunny where she could see the sky. I started out feeling terrible that she’d spent the first month of her life trapped on a literal garbage planet, but then we were in space and on Asgard and then Thanos…well, you know the rest. All that matters now is that we’re finally together as a family again.”

Steve nodded in agreement and jutted his chin out towards the business card resting on the arm of her chair. “Is that Fury’s phone number?”

“He offered us a similar set-up to Clint and Laura’s.” (Y/N)’s fingertips thoughtfully caressed her daughter’s soft cheek as she continued. “He wants us to give him a call once we’ve decided where we want to go from here.”

The super-soldier was silent for several moments, and it wasn’t until Carina had fallen back asleep that he finally spoke. “Yeah, I’ve been giving that a lot of thought lately, since even before the time heist. But it wasn’t until Tony and I traveled to 1970 and I saw Peggy again that I finally knew what I wanted.” (Y/N) quickly looked up at him as he took a deep breath and reluctantly met her gaze. “(Y/N), there’s something I need to tell you…”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The following week was filled with tearful goodbyes and promises to keep in touch. Thor was set to make a brief visit to New Asgard before departing Earth with the Guardians of the Galaxy; (Y/N) understood the Asgardian’s desire for change and wished him luck on his search to find himself, tearfully reminding her friend that if he needed anything at all, their door would always be open for him. Rocket and Nebula surprised her when they presented her with her own Volkswagen Bug, miraculously and inexplicably restored to its former glory; she suspected that the mechanical geniuses might’ve obtained some replacement parts through illegal means but she kept her thoughts to herself and accepted their thoughtful gift, giving the normally-reserved pair large hugs and standing alongside Steve as they watched the Benatar take to the skies.

Clint, Laura and their three children returned to their farm; the Barton’s were kind enough to offer Wanda a place to stay, but the younger woman politely declined their invitation and claimed that she had something to take care of. (Y/N), who suspected that Wanda would try to track down Vision’s body and demand its return from whichever federal agency claimed it after the Snap, hugged her tight and wished her luck. The loss of yet another person in Wanda’s life was obviously hitting her hard, and (Y/N) silently hoped that she would reach out to her old friends and teammates for help or support if she needed it. Rhodes was reinstated by Secretary Ross – albeit reluctantly – as an officer within the Air Force, while Happy continued his work as head of security for Stark Industries and Pepper returned as its CEO.

Scott traveled back to San Francisco with the Pym-Van Dyne family, eagerly looking forward to reconnecting with his daughter Cassie and catching up on the five years he’d lost while trapped in the Quantum Realm. Stephen Strange returned to the New York Sanctum Sanctorum and resumed his post as its protector while Wong, the new Sorcerer Supreme, moved into Kamar-Taj to continue training the young sorcerers who lived there. Peter Parker was re-enrolled in his old high school, with his aunt and friends there to support him as he tried to return to some semblance of normalcy. And T’Challa, Shuri and Okoye returned to Wakanda, with the Black Panther resuming his rule as the King of Wakanda and working out how his nation could provide relief to the millions of displaced and struggling people scattered across the world.

While construction crews worked to remove rubble and debris from the former site of the Avengers Facility, Bruce built a new Quantum Tunnel in the woods near the lake and the day after it was completed, the few remaining Avengers gathered for one final mission: to return the Infinity Stones back to their original timelines. But this time, it was a mission that Steve and Steve alone would be embarking on, and no amount of arguments from Sam and Bucky could convince him otherwise.

“Now, remember, you have to return the stones to the exact moment you got them,” Bruce explained, opening the locked case resting on his makeshift desk to reveal the stones resting in their own individual settings. “Or else you’re gonna open up a bunch of nasty alternative realities.”

Steve nodded and closed its lid before activating the locking mechanism. “Don’t worry, Bruce. Clip all the branches.”

The scientist watched him take the case before averting his saddened gaze. “You know, I tried. When I had the gauntlet, I really tried to bring her back.” (Y/N) and Sam exchanged a saddened look, and her hand slipped into her pocket to touch the red hourglass-shaped buckle she’d carried with her since Natasha’s death. “I miss her, man.”

“Me, too.” Steve gave Bruce’s uninjured forearm a comforting pat and fell into step between (Y/N) and Sam as they walked towards the illuminated Quantum Tunnel.

“You know, it’s not too late for me to come with you.” Sam offered the super-soldier a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Seriously, Steve, my wings are in the trunk. Just say the word and I’ll go put ‘em on.”

“You’re a good man, Sam,” Steve grinned but shook his head. “This one’s on me, though.”

While Bruce continued to make last-minute adjustments to his equipment, Steve approached Bucky, who was standing guard beside Carina’s floating pram and letting her hold onto the index finger of his vibranium hand. “Don’t do anything stupid ‘till I get back.”

“How can I? You’re takin’ all the stupid with you.” Both men shared matching smirks of amusement before hugging; Bucky’s eyes briefly met (Y/N)’s over Steve’s shoulder and she gave him a reassuring smile, understanding exactly why he was so worried for his old friend. She and Steve only told him of his plan the night before, after all, so it was a miracle that the super-soldier was handling the news as well as he was. They separated after a moment, and Bucky gave him a forced smile. “Gonna miss you, buddy.”

“It’s gonna be okay, Buck.” He clapped Bucky on the shoulder before bending down to kiss Carina on her forehead. “I’ll be back before you know it, okay? Be good for your mom, angel.” The infant babbled and wriggled around as Steve gave her another kiss and when he straightened, he turned to face (Y/N); his azure eyes were filled with determination but as they took her in, they softened and he gave her a tender smile. “I love you, (Y/N). I always have, and I always will.”

“I love you too, Steve.” Her husband’s hand cradled her cheek and their lips met in a gentle but passionate good-bye kiss. When they finally pulled away, she held his face between her hands and smiled up at him as she forced herself not to cry. “Go get ‘em, sweetheart, and come home safe.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Steve winked and gave her another kiss before ascending the steps and standing at the center of the new Quantum Tunnel.

Sam’s brow was furrowed in confusion as the super-soldier tapped his wrist to activate his Quantum suit into covering his red-white-and blue uniform. “Wait a sec, how long is this gonna take?”

“For him? As long as he needs. For us? Five seconds,” Bruce replied from his control booth, waiting until Steve picked up Mjolnir to hover a hand over a lever to continue. “Ready, Cap?” Steve took a deep breath and gave the scientist a nod, and Bucky’s hand slipped into (Y/N)’s and gave it a gentle squeeze. “All right. We’ll meet you back here, okay?”

“You bet.” The Quantum suit’s helmet enveloped his head and the machinery surrounding him began to hum.

(Y/N)’s hand gripped Bucky’s tight and she anxiously bit her lip as Bruce started his count-down. “Going Quantum in three…two…one!” In the blink of an eye, Steve shrank into nothing and the three of them watched the vacant platform with bated breath while Bruce began his next countdown. “And returning in five…four…three…two…one!”

There was a blinding flash of light and a figure appeared on the platform, hunching over as if catching their breath; the Quantum suit deactivated to reveal their small frame, old-fashioned clothing and a large circular leather case slung over his shoulders. Chaos erupted all around (Y/N), with Sam ordering the figure to stay still and protectively putting himself in front of her and Carina while Bruce frantically checked to make sure his equipment hadn’t malfunctioned, but all she could do was release a shaky breath and quickly sidestep her best friend to ascend the Quantum Tunnel’s steps.

“(Y/N), what the hell are you doing?!” Sam’s hand latched around her wrist to halt her. “We don’t know who the hell this guy is or-”

“Easy, Sam.” Bucky stepped forward and rested his flesh hand on Sam’s shoulder. “She knows what she’s doing.”

Giving the super-soldier a grateful look, (Y/N) turned and continued up the steps while one of her hands slipped into her pocket to grip a stun disc. “Steve?” Her husband, nearly a foot shorter and a hundred pounds lighter, raised his head and met her gaze; the instant his azure eyes found hers, she knew without a shadow of a doubt that it was her Steve standing before her but after 2014 Nebula’s effortless deception and the heavy price they’d paid for it, they agreed to take precautions on the off-chance that history would repeat itself. “Steve, what’s the special nickname you gave me when we first started dating? The one that you’ve never used unless we’re entirely alone?”

Steve’s lips curved into a wide smile. “Tiny Dancer, because you always reminded me of the woman that Elton John was singing about in the song.” (Y/N) surged forward and pulled him into a hug that he was eager to reciprocate. “God, I missed you, sunshine. Doctor Erskine worked as quickly as he could but all I could think about was getting back home to you and Carina, and I-”

“It’s okay, sweetheart, you did it, you made it back to us just like I knew you would.” They pulled away only for Steve to hold her face between his hands and soundly kiss her, sighing happily against her lips when she returned his passion-filled kiss. When they eventually separated, she couldn’t keep herself from smiling widely as she took in his altered appearance. “My handsome husband. I take it that there weren’t any complications?”

Before Steve could answer, the sound of a throat loudly clearing caused them both to look over at Sam, who was standing by the platform steps with his hands on his hips and a brow arched in shock. “Cap?”

“Hi, Sam.” With a sheepish expression on his face, Steve followed (Y/N) down the steps and stood before their two friends, his eyes briefly flicking over to Carina’s pram before turning his attention back to Sam.

A knowing smile began to play on Sam’s lips as he slowly pieced everything together. “So, did something go wrong, or did something go right?”

“Right, definitely right.” A loud sigh of relief escaped Bruce and he immediately stopped fiddling with the switches on his control booth, and Steve chuckled. “Sorry, Bruce. Before I volunteered to put the stones back, I thought that maybe I’ll try some of that life Tony was telling me to get. So, I paid a visit to an old friend and managed to have most of the serum’s enhancements reversed; I’m in mostly better health than I was in 1943, since a reversal of the serum can’t just un-cure medical conditions, but other than that, I’m still just a kid from Brooklyn.” Muscles and super-soldier serum or no muscles and super-soldier serum, (Y/N) silently agreed with her husband, recalling their frank conversation the week earlier right after the funeral…

“Yeah, I’ve been giving that a lot of thought lately, since even before the time heist. But it wasn’t until Tony and I traveled to 1970 and I saw Peggy again that I finally knew what I wanted.” (Y/N) quickly looked up at him as he took a deep breath and reluctantly met her gaze. “(Y/N), there’s something I need to tell you…”

“What is it, Steve?”

“Seeing the life that Peggy led after I went into the ice and that old photograph of me on her desk got me thinking, about what our future could look like depending on the choices we make now while we still can. It’s time for me to hang up the shield and finally live my life as Steve Rogers,” Steve explained, leaning forward in his wicker chair and adjusting his hold on Carina so that he could rest a hand on one of hers. “I never thought I’d feel guiltless at the idea of stopping, but I don’t. All that matters to me now is you and Carina, sunshine, and to make sure that it stays that way, I have an idea…”

Bruce walked over to their group and smiled. “Good for you, Steve. Tony, he…he’d really be proud of you.”

Sam nodded. “I’m happy for you. Truly.” Steve’s azure eyes shone with gratitude at their friends’ acceptance, but (Y/N) saw a flicker of sadness cross her best friend’s features. “Only thing bummin’ me out is the fact I have to live in a world without Captain America.”

“Oh, that reminds me…” With (Y/N)’s help, Steve shrugged off the leather case off his shoulders and leaned it against the steps before unzipping it to reveal an undamaged red-white-and blue vibranium shield. “Try it on.”

The smirk on Sam’s face vanished as the implications of Steve’s invitation settled in. He looked over at Bucky, who gave him a firm nod, and then at (Y/N), who beamed in happiness for him; the night before, Steve told her and Bucky what he was intending on doing with the mantle he’d carried for eighty years and while a part of her was wary of the pressure her best friend might feel, she knew in her heart that there was no one better suited to be Captain America than Sam Wilson.

Still looking a little uncertain, Sam picked up the shield and carefully slipped the leather straps onto his left arm; he stared down at the shield in silence, and (Y/N) and Bucky shared a smile as Steve quietly asked, “How does it feel?”

“…Like it’s someone else’s.”

Steve shook his head and waited until Sam met his gaze to speak. “It’s not.”

(Y/N)’s eyes prickled with unshed tears as she watched her best friend struggle to hold back his own; he took a deep breath and looked out through the trees at the nearby lake before looking back at Steve with an earnest smile on his face. “Thank you. I’ll do my best.”

“That’s why it’s yours,” Steve answered with a grin and both men shook hands, Sam’s large hand enveloping Steve’s newly-smaller one.

(Y/N), making sure to mind her stitches, practically launched herself into her best friend’s open arm and gave him the tightest hug she could manage. “I’m really proud of you, Sam. This doesn’t mean I’ll stop calling you ‘Birdbrain,’ though; that nickname’s for life and not even Captain America can change that.”

Sam laughed. “I read you loud and clear, Booksmart.” He kissed the top of her head and wiped a stray tear away as they pulled away. “So, what’re you three gonna do now? Settle down on a farm like the Barton’s and make a half dozen more of these cutie-pies?” Carina, who was now contentedly nestled in her father’s thin arms, giggled as Sam tickled the patch of skin under her chin.

“Steve Rogers living on a farm?” Bucky scoffed with a twinkle of amusement in his blue eyes. “This punk’s a born-and-raised Brooklynite; all that farm-fresh air might finally do him in.”

Steve rolled his eyes as he rocked Carina. “A hundred and six years old and still a mother hen.”

“Punk.”

“Jerk.”

“Are you gonna keep on writing, (Y/N), or are you gonna go back to teaching at Brooklyn College?” Bruce asked. “My fans absolutely love your books, and I hear that your students are really missing their favorite professor.”

With a mischievous smile, (Y/N) looped her arm around Steve’s narrow shoulders and shared a loving look with him before turning her attention back to the three men standing before her. “We have a plan that sort of includes a little of all of the above, actually. What’s say we explain it to you guys over some lunch at that diner down the road? Our treat.”

“Thanks, doll. I could really go for a cheeseburger.”

“Wait a sec, how do you know what a cheeseburger is?”

“Because I ate my first cheeseburger in 1935, Birdbrain, the same year that they were invented.”

Sam and Bucky continued bickering as they walked along the makeshift path to where they all parked and while an amused Bruce egged their argument on, (Y/N) and Steve trailed behind the boisterous trio, lost in their own little world and the long-awaited promise of a peaceful life together with their beloved daughter.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: Did anyone see that coming?! I hope that you guys like the deviation from canon, it’s the ending that I always thought they’d go for with Steve lol thank you all so much for reading and commenting! I’ve created a Spotify playlist inspired by this series, and I’ll be updating it every time I upload a new chapter. Enjoy!

Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5L6MERx3PIydW3FyNPqYvl?si=ad6c46de8e954c11

Epilogue

“Endgame” Masterlist

Tagging: @mrs-obrien @lahoete @awkward117 @cminr @natdrunk @momc95​ @savedbystyle @miraculouscloud @awkwardnesshabitat @marinettepotterandplagg @mangosandmimosas @supersouthy @benakenalove @brooke0297 @hufflepeople @becausewelie @outoftheregular @junipermurdock @ladydmalfoy @mads-weasley @username23345 @crist1216 @capswife @lilmschild @avngrsinitiative @crowleysqueenofhell @y-napotat @mary1raven @groovy-lady @ljej95 @innersublimefury @prettysbliss

𝐑𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐏𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧, 𝐖𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐞

𝐀/𝐍: Hi dearies! How are you all? I was craving some Bucky Barnes. Hope you're all ok!

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Bucky Barnes x Reader

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 5236

𝐑𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠: Angst/Smut

𝐅𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐟𝐫𝐞𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞/𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭/𝐫𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐜. 𝐃𝐎 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐑𝐄𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐓 𝐓𝐎 ���𝐍𝐘 𝐒𝐈𝐓𝐄

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: 18+ minors DNI, reference to mental illness, reference to abusive relationships, violence, gore, praise, p in v sex, protected sex, hand job, blow job, slight fingering. 

𝐃𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐛𝐲 @firefly-graphics​

The sound of my fists meeting the worn canvas of the bag echoed as I trained. Being a SHIELD agent was never easy, romance never having place in this sort of job. But not just romantic love, any sort of love in general.

The training doors creaked, the soft padding towards me as I refocused my attention. But I knew why he was here. But that didn’t mean I had to welcome him with open arms.

“Here to give me a ‘I’m sorry for your loss speech’?” I huffed, kicking the bag with a renewed vigor.

He remained silent, his piercing even though I refused to meet them.

“I’d think you wouldn’t want to hear anything I have to say,” Bucky responded. My eyes flittered to him for a fraction of a second. A dark Henley covered his muscular torso while a matching pair of pants fitted his legs, his arms folded across that wide chest of his. He held a tablet in one hand, no doubt my vitals.

“Didn’t think you could use one old man,” I scoffed, motioning to the tablet, returning my attention to the bag. Knuckles sore and chest heaving, I closed my eyes- his last few moments replaying in my head.

I saw a tip to scope the old library, a sort of threat. I hadn’t been out in ages, well without Sam or Bucky but I couldn’t wait for them.

I treaded through the shelves, my hair tucked in a baseball hat and my fists in my jacket pockets. There were no signs of disturbances and yet, a disturbance was supposedly there.

Peering loosely at the shelves, I heard a familiar laugh, my ego just stinging a bit more as I turned. It had been almost two years but who would ever forget your best friend?

Or more accurately, your best friend and your ex-boyfriend.

He grinned at her, his eyes closing as he kissed her. I exhaled quietly, my former friend and lover shoulder to shoulder as their engagement bands twinkled. He’d never loved me; I’d come to realise. I remembered our last argument- well more so confrontation as both defended why they snuck behind my back.

It didn’t matter now, but it stung then, despite their words replaying so often.

Jaw clenching, I looked away, my eyes catching on a smear of red paint across the dark shelves. An impending dread filled me, my fingers wrapping around the holster of my gun. The hushed whispers of readers were drowned by the blaring of blood in my ears as I followed the red paint trail.

It was a peculiar shade- the paint. Not to bright but quite dark, somewhat like blood.

Gritting my teeth, I punched with a renewed vigor, sweating pouring into my eyes.

I heard her laugh- some joke he made, but I was far too concerned with the way the trail began to dwindle. Gentle hues of gold light illuminated the otherwise dim library, the mellow sounds of hushed whispers contrasting gently with the pouring of the rain outside. The glass ceiling showed the cloudy moon, nightfall now settling in.

Gun pointed outwards, they laughed again, but I heard the faint beeping.

“I’m not going to apologise for what I did,” Bucky spat, his hand tightening on the tablet.

I punched harder, throwing a kick or two into the mix.

“Here to gloat then? Scold me for not waiting?” I jeered as I gasped.

My eyes narrowed at the mass of red paint followed by the sharp metallic scent and soft beeping that emanated from the shelf. Cursing, I wondered how long I’d have gone without realizing it was blood.

“You weren’t supposed to be back on the field,” Bucky hissed, “even your vitals show-,”

“Then what use am I to this team?” I stared at him, “You don’t let me on the field, I don’t get to work in the lab, I don’t get to train. Tell me, how does that make me a valuable member of this team?”

He cursed silently.

Tucking my gun in the waist of my pants, I grabbed the books and began to toss them off the shelf. My vision began to spot in rhythm with my heart. A loud roar followed by a kick to my side sent me sprawling as the threat found me.

“I did what was right,” he insisted, “I saved your life.”

Screams filled the library, everyone racing to the exit. Racing to my feet, I grabbed the knife under my sleeve and got to work. Soon the wooden floors were covered in blood, but as my attacker fell, another took their place.

People wailed in protest, the doors refusing to open.

Ambush.

“I didn’t ask you to save me,” I retorted, returning my attention to the bag.

A chill began to settle in the base of my spine, my mind moving faster than I could think. Grunts of pain echoed through the library, almost masking the sound of fright by the civilians.

I was outnumbered. But the sound of glass shattering, followed by the sprinkle of rain against my face made my chest pound.

Sam dove into the library, throwing his shield at the door. Bucky approached me, snapping the neck of the attacker before me.

“What did-,”

“Now is not the time Bucky,” I growled, turning my attention back to the beeping.

Sam fought off the rest of the ambush, Bucky’s baby blues peering at me.

“Go help him, I can do this,” I shouted over the screaming and gunshots.

“There’s a reason you weren’t allowed on the field,” he said, “you can’t just do what you want.”

I aimed another punch at the bag.

“Are you even listening to me?” Bucky gritted, his fingers wrapping around my arm. Turning to him, my teeth grinded as I shoved him against the punching bag.

A wave of relief washed over me as I heard the creaking of the door. Yanking more books from the shelf, I finally found the explosive. I pulled apart the cover, searching for the detonator- something- anything to disarm it. There were no wires, no timer, no anything. I turned to him; his attention already glued to me.

“Just get them out,” I cried over the jumble of disharmony.

“No, I’m not leaving your side,” he insisted.

“Just help them,” I hissed, “I can do this.”

Bucky twisted, shoving me against the punching bag- his fingers around my throat. The tablet clattered to the concrete floor, a soft oof exhaling from his lips as I kicked him away.

“You should have listened to me,” I hissed, an impending sense of dread filling me. I aimed another kick at his head, but he blocked me easily.

“And watch you die?” Bucky grabbed me; my back pressed against his front. Hands wrapped around my body- trapping my arms- I groaned. Hooking his foot with mine, I brought us crashing to the hard floor.

I didn’t wait to see if he’d left, but I knew I had to do something. Wetting my lips slightly, I touched the bomb slightly, the beeping speeding up. I found the wires, the assortment staring right back at me. Suppressing a breath, I snapped the blue wire, the beeping coming to a halt.

I turned to face Bucky, my eyes briefly catching my former best friend and lover. My name began to form on his lips, but I never saw it finish as my body went weightless, the scent of sweat and soap clogging my senses. Body wrapped by his, we plunged into the cold of the river, the deafening bang of the bomb rattling my teeth even as Bucky held me underwater.

“That’s not your choice to make,” I growled, kicking at him.

Grabbing my ankle, he flipped my body, my vision spotting as he pinned me to the rough ground beneath us. His blue eyes were tinged red, his jaw clenching as he pressed his toned body onto mine.

“I’m not going to watch you die,” he insisted, “you are reckless and have done nothing but put yourself at death’s door. Tonight, would not have happened if you just stayed put.”

His breath smelt of cheap liquor, his eyes trained on me the way a predator intimidates his prey.

“If I had to pick between watching two people who hurt you die, or you die- I would pick them every fucking time,” Bucky growled.

“You could have saved them, you could-,”

“Stop,” he ordered, his grip tightening around my pinned arms.

Bucky leaned down to my face, his eyes flittering to my lips.

“We could have saved them,” I insisted, hearing the waver in my voice.

A loose tear trailed down my cheek, my vision now blurring with tears. Bucky had never seen me cry, no one in SHIELD had. SHIELD was my home since I could remember. I was okay, I don’t know why the sudden prevention from me performing in the field became an issue.

“There was nothing wrong with me,” I hardened my eyes as I met his fiery gaze, “Nothing has been wrong with me for months. Its just you that’s become worried about me. What are you afraid of? Losing your only pal?”

I regretted it instantly, his eyes darkening and narrowing at my taunt. Bucky leaned impossibly closer, his nose brushing mine. My throat dried, his lips mere centimeters from mine. A flutter erupted in my stomach, amongst the pain and urge to scream. I was certain he could feel my heartbeat if not hear it.

“The only reason that they’re dead is because of you,” he hissed, his eyes unforgiving, “that tip was for Sam and I. You’re not allowed on the field because you don’t give a shit about yourself, and you don’t mind hurting everyone just so that you stop hurting.”

A pressure formed in the base of my throat, my brain struggling to function.

“I love you,” Bucky growled, his eyes dark, “I’ve loved you for months now. You don’t care about me, fine. You don’t love anymore, fine. But I’m not going to pretend I don’t care about you or watch you throw yourself into danger all because you can’t see past what two people said.”

I stared at his plush lips, my heart reeling at his confession. Bucky sat up, his weight pinning me to the cold floor. Standing, he looked down at me, his jaw tensing while his hands curled into fists.

“You can hate me all you want, but you’re not fit to be on that field and tonight proved it,” he hissed, “do whatever the fuck you want Y/L/N, I’m done trying.”

Bucky kicked the tablet towards me, my jaw clenching as I stared at my diagnosis. He gave me one last cold stare before turning on his heels and slamming the doors behind him.

I thumbed the last of the frosting from the cupcake, licking the sweet chocolate off my finger. It had been almost a year since I’d left SHIELD, and well I suppose you could say my life’s been better.

The soft aroma of jasmine perfumed the air, the sound of my kettle whistling interrupting the morning silence. That morning after Bucky and I’d spoken, I left. I didn’t bother with any of my things. Didn’t bother to say goodbye. My pride was hurt, but my heart ached even more.

It was difficult to accept that I’d become unwell. But I’d been seeing a psychiatrist for almost ten months so maybe that was good.

Blowing the tea gently, my eyes flittered over the papers. Sam and Bucky seemed to almost always be in the headlines- doing good.

I missed them. I missed my family.

It was difficult leaving the only home I knew, but Bucky had been right.

I think I missed him the most. I suppose even under all my layers of hate and anger, I longed for him.

Finishing my tea, I dropped the cup in the sink, grabbing my coat and mittens. I stepped outside my flat, my eyes shutting for the briefest second. Tucking my hands in my coat, I walked the streets of London.

My hand grazed the brass doorknob, jaw clenching as my door swayed gently. I’d been out for most of the day, running errands, buying books, sipping coffee, sampling pastries- the works. Sighing, I opened my door, the room dark. Turning the light on, I set my bags on the counter, my back to the kitchen island.

“How’d you find me?” I asked gently, my heart thundering with a mixture of panic and excitement.

“I know the guy who owns these flats,” Sam grinned. I turned to face him, a small smile forming on my face. My eyes searched for another person, but it seemed like Sam was here alone. Walking towards him, he gave me one of the warmest bear hugs I’d had in a while. Pulling away, I motioned towards the groceries.

“Let me make you dinner?”

Sam sat on the accent chair; disappointment written on his face.

“What do you mean you can’t come back?” he asked for the millionth time.

I sighed.

“You were one of the best scientists there,” he said, “and you were great on the field too, but we need your skills.”

“What about the others in the lab?” I asked, genuinely curious, “can’t they help?”

Sam shook his head, “No one has much experience as you do with like monster and aliens and stuff. You’re practically an avenger man.”

I almost smiled.

“Look, you’re still technically a SHIELD agent,” Sam continued, “they can still call on you since you left. Besides, it’s not the same with you gone.”

How’s he doing? Has he moved on with someone else?

I mentally cleared the thought from my head. Exhaling slightly, I stared at Sam. He grinned, causing me to roll my eyes.

“When do we leave?” I grumbled.

“Right now,” he said as he stood.

I stood abruptly, motioning to my flat, “What about my flat? Or my stuff?”

He stuffed the remainder of the croissant in his mouth.

“They have your stuff.”

I nodded, my nerves overcoming me. It wasn’t just the anticipation of seeing him, it was the job to.

I could do this, I’m better, I’m more fit, I’m more aware, I can do this.

Maria stood at the entrance; her hands folded but a smile covering her face.

“Welcome back Agent,” she nodded, handing me a file.

We wasted no time, heading to the lab straight away. Well, more like I forced her to take me to the lab. I did not want to see anyone.

The sharp scent of antiseptic filled the air, the whirring of machinery in the background. It was a bit more complex than expected but I got the job done. A few new faces gathered behind the glass screen while I worked, constantly trying to keep calm.

It had been almost seven hours now, the tests and trial finishing up.

I let out a sharp exhale, the back of my neck cramping. Looking up, I spotted Sam waving to me. I made sure one of the interns delivered the report to Maria while Sam motioned to someone.

“I know there’s someone excited to see you again,” he grinned. My heart pounded with anticipation, my head becoming foggy with excitement.

My heart jittered to a stop, a face I barely remembered greeting me. I tried my best to remember but luckily Sam noticed I was tired. He led me back to the quinjet, my eyes focused ahead. As I ascended the jet, I looked at him.

“Where’s Bucky?” I finally asked, my heart thundering as I awaited his response.

He shrugged.

“Probably out with the girl he’s been seeing,” Sam responded.

I swallowed the lump in my throat, nodding. Hugging Sam goodbye and promising to visit, I felt a tiny stab of pain in the base of my heart.

I regretted everything I’d said and the way I left that night.

I remembered crying the minute he left the training room. He was wrong in a way, but he didn’t deserve the way I treated him. Bucky’s confession sat heavily in my heart- I hadn’t stopped thinking about it since.

But that was in the past, and he moved on and I am too.

The ride back to London was uneventful to say the least. I don’t even know if I was allowed to leave, Sam just helped me.

Sighing, the soft morning sun glistened against the dew drops that covered the flower petals. Unlocking the door to my flat, I exhaled heavily, locking the door straight away.

“I didn’t know you liked waffles,” Bucky murmured, my keys slipping from my grip.

I faced him, my eyes searching his face- for what I don’t know. He wore a black t-shirt, matching his pants obviously. His jacket was slung on my table, two steaming cups sitting on coasters. An array of berries and waffles laid messily but sweetly on tablemats, but my attention was to him.

“I prefer the ones with blueberries,” I responded, keeping my voice as monotone as possible.

He stood, baby blues drinking in my appearance. I hadn’t changed much since we last saw each other. Maybe I’d gained some weight and wore my glasses all the time instead of contacts. And maybe I let my hair grow. But why did that matter? I’d hurt him. And he’s happy now.

“How did you find me?” I asked, something fiery igniting within me.

Bucky shrugged, his eyes not leaving me. He walked towards me, myself stepping back. My back met the cool surface of the door as he stood before me. He smelt of soap, coffee and something distinctly him.

“Why’d you leave?” Bucky croaked, his body mere inches from mine.

I was unable to meet his gaze, and yet I forced myself any way.

“Y/N,” he sighed, a finger hooking under my chin. Sparks shot from where he touched me, my eyes flittering from his to his lips. “I never meant to hurt you,” he continued, “I just-,”

“I love you,” I blurted, my eyes tearing up.

He fell silent, his eyebrows scrunching together.

“What?”

I swallowed hard; his hand that held my face now fallen to his side.

“You were right,” I exhaled shakily, “I wasn’t well. I’d been reckless and I’d been awful to you. I’m so sorry, you didn’t deserve any of it.”

“I guess I was afraid I’d lost you too that night,” I stared at him, “I know it was all my fault, and- and I’ve been trying to get better. I just- I was so angry, with everything and everyone. You were right, I was awful, and I didn’t care. I’m so incredibly sorry and it probably doesn’t mean anything now, but I-,”

His lips were pressed on mine before I could finish my sentence. One hand cupping my face, he pulled away slowly, stroking away the tears that were streaming down my face.

“Say it again,” he murmured, his eyes searching mine.

I swallowed my fear.

“I love you Bucky,” I whispered.

He exhaled shakily, his eyes red.

“I’m sorry too,” he said, “I shouldn’t have lied to you, or- or kept you from doing what you love.”

I stared at him.

“I love you,” he continued, “I missed you so much.”

As the words left his mouth, he pressed his lips to mine in what I could only describe as the most passionate kiss I’d ever experienced. Hands snaking up his back, he licked his way into my mouth, a soft moan being drowned in the endless kisses.

Pulling away, my chest heaved, his eyes searching for what he did wrong. Hand resting on his chest, I panted, catching my breath.

“Sam,” I inhaled, “Sam mentioned that you were seeing someone, I-,”

Bucky hooked his hands under my thighs, lifting me against the door as I squealed.

“The only girl I want to be seeing right now is you,” he looked down, “that is if you do me the honour of letting me be your boyfriend.”

It was my turn to kiss him, my hands fisting his hair as he moaned into my mouth. It was like a surge of energy somehow made its way through my body. It was an immeasurable quantum that made my insides muddled and  alive all at once.

Bucky tightened his grip on me, walking towards my bedroom. I hadn’t any doubt that he searched the flat before I got here, but all I could think about was the way his tongue traced mine perfectly.

Laying me on the bed, I whimpered in protest as he pulled away. Bucky grinned, tearing his shirt off, his well-defined torso more muscular than I remembered. His hands reached for my pants, and he tore it in two as I yelped. Reaching for me, he removed my hoodie and stared hungrily at my matching set.

Eyes fixated on his, I unzipped his pants slowly, pushing it down his legs. I stood before him; his eyes glued to mine as he devoured my surprised yelp with a searing kiss. Picking me up once more, he dropped me on the bed, his body between my thighs.

“Can I take these off?” he asked gently, motioning to my bra.

I sat up, unclasping and tossing my bra to some part of my room. My entire body felt overly hot as Bucky stared at me, his baby blues hidden in the sea of lust.

“You’re beautiful Doll,” he exhaled.

His hands fondled my breasts while I pulled him down for a kiss. Bucky trailed a series of love bites down the column of my throat, biting a sensitive spot right at the base of my neck. His warm tongue laved over my peaked nipples, swirling and suckling harshly.

It had been years but being with Bucky Barnes was not something that could be compared.

I cried out for him, my hands pulling him up so I could kiss him. He peered up at me, his body hovering over mine.

Flipping him onto his back, he stared at me in shock as I straddled him. I pressed a bruising kiss to his lips, his groans swallowed. Grinding my hips slowly against him, I felt his hard cock imprinted at the side of my thigh.

I swallowed nervously. He was not my first lover, but he was no doubt big.

Kissing down his neck, I sucked bruises into his skin as I trailed my way to his boxers. Bucky’s skin was beyond warm and soft beneath me. He peered at me as I kissed the V-line of his abs.

“Doll what are you-,”

“I want a taste,” I exhaled, pulling his boxers down.

Tinged red and head leaking with precum, his cock hit the base of his tummy as I flung his boxers off. He was huge, and so impossibly thick. Sinking lower down the bed, I pressed kisses between his thighs before licking the precum off his tip.

“Gods,” he moaned, his flesh hand fisting my hair into a ponytail.

Trailing kisses down the underside of his cock, I felt his vein throb at my touch, his chest heaving as I reached his balls.

“You don’t know what you do to me,” Bucky choked out, his metal arm grappling with the bed frame as I licked back up his cock.

He was so responsive, his soft groans filling the air. Suckling his head, I swallowed the length of him, and he moaned. Bucky’s grip tightened on my hair as I bobbed my head up and down, gagging as I pleasured him.

“That’s it,” he crooned, “good fucking girl.”

Oh Gods. My panties clung to me, his praise going straight to my cunt.

Gagging around his cock, my eyes began to water, his hand pushing me down further. Even as I gagged, I couldn’t take the length of him. I pumped the rest of him with one hand while I fondled his balls with the other, sucking his cock with everything I had.

“Look at you huh,” he moaned, “Oh Gods.”

Bucky twitched inside me, his eyes rolling back as his legs shook from pleasure. Shouting loudly, he pushed my head down the length of his cock, releasing his cum down my throat. Pulling off his length, I jerked him off as he kept cumming, swallowing what he gave me. Groaning beneath me, I caught my breath as I squeezed the base of his cock.

Eyes lidded and chest heaving, he stared at me, his throat bobbing as I licked the cum that coated the lower portion of my face.

“C’mere Doll,” Bucky moaned. Snaking up to him, he kissed me languidly, not even caring for the taste of himself. Pushing me up his body, I sat on his abs, my cunt slick as I sat on his abs.

“M’gonna ride your abs Sergeant,” I moaned, the hard ridges of his muscles sending tingles up my spine.

Nodding breathlessly, he grabbed my underwear and tore it straight off my body. Frowning slightly, he chuckled.

“I’ll buy you a new pair Doll,” he smiled, “I’ll buy you all the pairs you want.”

I nodded, my cunt already rocking on his abs.

It was euphoric, my own personal opiate. The hard ridges off his abs caught all the sensitive parts of my cunt just right as I rode my lover.

“My pretty girl,” Bucky exhaled, his metal arm resting on my waist as I rode him, “doing so good for me baby.”

I mewled under his praise, my toes curling as his flesh hand returned to fondle my breasts. My hips were rocking at their own tempo, his praise and touches sending me into overdrive. Planting my hands on his chest, I grinded down- his face strained with excitement.

“Bucky,” I moaned, “m’gonna cum.”

“Cum for me Doll,” he groaned, placing both hands on my hips as I felt my thighs begin to burn.

Moaning lewdly as my head fell back, I felt the thin cord that tethered me between pleasure and euphoria snap as I reached my climax- cumming on his abs. Bucky helped me ride out my orgasm before pulling my breathless face down for a kiss.

We moaned in unison, our hands tangling as I came down from my high. I felt his thick cock brushing against my thigh and I slid down his body.

Bucky stared at me while I stared at the mess I’d made on his abs. Taking two fingers, he drew a long line and sucked gently. My face felt hot as he moaned. A surge of boldness overcame me as I cleaned my mess from his abs, his jaw slack as he watched me.

“Gods who decided to make me the luckiest guy in the world huh?” he groaned as he smiled at me.

Flipping me on my back, he stared at me, his chest heaving and his eyes wide with a mixture of love and lust.

“I’ve waited for this for so long,” he confessed, “I love you, Doll.”

“I love you too Bucky, thank you.”

“For?”

“Forgiving me, I really-,”

He silenced me with a kiss, his lips less forceful and more loving. After what seemed like an eternity, he pulled away, his lips red and swollen. His flesh hand reached between my legs, and I gasped. Fingers circling my clit, I stared at him, eyes rolling back as he slipped them into my hole.

“Bucky, I-,”

“I need to stretch you out Doll,” he exhaled, eyes closing as he fingered me, “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“I can take it,” I moaned as he curled his fingers in me.

“Please Bucky, I need you,” I mewled, my eyes beginning to crisscross.

Cursing, he pulled his fingers out, sucking on them languidly.

“You taste like heaven,” he sighed.

Heart thundering in my chest, I opened the draw of my bedside table and pulled out a condom.

“I’m not on-,”

“You don’t need to explain Doll,” he smiled as he tore open the packet.

Bucky rolled the thin layer onto his cock, positioning himself at my entrance. Holding me close, a serious expression crossed his face.

“You sure you want to do this?” he asked softly, his pupils consuming his iris.

I nodded.

“Words Baby.”

“I am Bucky,” I moaned softly, nudging my hips to his cock.

The bulbous head of his cock stretched my cunt wider than it ever had been, my eyes welling shut. Inch by inch he slowly eased himself into me. But every time I thought he ended, it seemed like he was as continuous as time. Finally, fully inside me, I wrapped my legs around him, the sting of the stretch shutting my eyes.

His thumb brushed across a tear that formed.

“You okay Doll?”

I nodded, exhaling shakily.

“You can move Bucky.”

His hips rocked slowly; a stab of pain followed by a stream of pleasure filling me. 

“Faster Bucky,” I groaned, my legs tightening around him.

“I’m trying to be a gentleman,” he moaned, his eyes shut with pleasure, “I promised I wouldn’t fuck you on our first time.”

“I don’t care,” I mewled, “Just fuck me please.”

Without a second word, his hips snapped into mine, stealing my breath as the length of him massaged my insides. I was soaring in seconds.

“So good, so good for me,” he grunted, his lips attacking my neck once more.

Not a single coherent thought crossed my mind while all I could think of was the way his cock moved within me. The way his head grazed and kissed that special spot within me had me crying his name.

“Fuck Fuck Fuck,” I screamed, his hips thrusting into me at an unbelievable speed.

Grabbing his face, I kissed him, but there was nothing loving about it. It was all tongue and teeth- animalistic and wild.

“I love you ohmygods I love you so much,” I babbled as he fucked me.

We would make love later, we’d both needed this for far too long. Bucky was pushing us up the bed, my hands gripping his back. I couldn’t even tell him how much I loved him from the pleasure he gave me.

A small thread of pleasure began to strengthen, the cord becoming tighter.

“Bucky, I’m close,” I moaned, my body tensing.

His flesh hand reached between our bodies as he began to rub tight circles on my clit. I couldn’t figure where he ended, and I began. The cord began to tighten, and his fingers rolled the swollen nub between his fingers.

“Let go Doll, I got you,” he cried, his cock twitching inside me.

Screaming his name, I came, the cord snapping. It was as if a tidal wave crashed, waves and waves of pleasure consuming my body as I cried and spasmed around him. Thrusting faster, my vision began to go white as I felt another wave of pleasure wrack my body. He cried my name, cumming with one last thrust.

Collapsing on my chest, we heaved in unison. I couldn’t form a proper sentence, my voice hoarse and my brain fried. Sitting up, his face sweaty and blotchy, Bucky kissed me gently.

“I love you Doll,” he moaned.

“I love you too Bucky,” I gasped.

“You okay?”

“Never better.”

And I meant it.

The Runaway Distance Life Of A Little Stark Ch 16: A taste of your action

Pairing: Tony Stark & daughter!Reader, brock rumlow vs reader, Nick fury & alexander pierce, Friday & reader, Natasha romanoff & nick fury vs Alexander,  pierce, Steve rogers & Maria Hill, Steve Rogers & Sam wilson Summary: After reveal, reader fights Warning: Flashback, fights, blood, bullet  Co author with: callikc

Tag:  @venomsvl  @geeksareunique​

Previous

-2013-

A year had passed since the Battle of New York and things in the city were just about getting back to normal.

The major landmarks had been reconstructed, more housing had been built to shelter those who had lost everything, and the losses sustained that day had been mourned. The Avengers were also a well established group now, everyone knew their names.

It was seemingly a normal day in the tower. Most of them were wandering the halls - save for Natasha who was on a mission of her own and Tony who was somewhere else - and it was Steve who found something that piqued all of their interest.

In Tony's personal space was a picture in a frame. The frame itself was brand new, meaning it was frequently looked after, but the picture was much older. It showed a girl of perhaps fifteen years of age who looked strikingly similar to someone they all knew. "Why does she look like Stark?" Clint asked, speaking everyone's mind. "She seems familiar." Thor said, certain he'd seen someone like her before. "She does." Bruce agreed. "Does he have any living relatives?" Steve questioned. "Wouldn't we know?" Clint asked. "I mean, the Starks have always been famous. And arrogant. You'd know if there was more than one." "He's never mentioned a girl." Bruce said. "There's probably a reason for it." "I'm asking Pepper." Before anyone could stop him, Clint was off. The other three shared a glance before following suit and going all the way up to Pepper's office. She was sitting at her desk going through various paperwork, probably for Stark Industries.Steve politely knocked on the door and she looked up, a friendly but intrigued smile on her face, before waving them in. They filed in one by one, filling the space easily. "Are you guys okay?" Pepper asked. "We require information." Thor stated. "What kind of information?" "In Stark's office there is a picture of a girl. What is she doing there?" "Straight to the point." Clint mused. "I applaud you." "Oh..." Her smile faltered. "I don't think that's a good idea." "Why? Who is she?" Steve asked."It's a complicated story, and I don't think I should be the one to tell you." "She's important to Tony, isn't she?" Bruce asked, a lot less demanding than his friends. Pepper hesitated, but nodded. "She's young, though. Unless he's into schoolgirls, it's gotta be-" Clint cut himself off, eyes wide. "Don't tell me he's got a kid." Her look said it all.  "He has a daughter?" The four avengers exclaimed at the same time, as shocked as each other. "How?" Bruce questioned. Clint smirked a little. "Well when two people love each other very much, stuff happens." He gave him a very unamused look. "Look, it's a sensitive topic." Pepper said, getting their attention again. "She and him weren't very close, and she ran away. Tony tried to find her for years but there's no trace anywhere." "What are the odds she's still alive?" Bruce asked.  "I don't know." She sighed. "I hope she's out there somewhere, we all do. Just... I think it's best you ask Tony for the whole story." "Come on." Clint said. "Time to solve a mystery." "Thank you, Lady Pepper." Thor said as the group once again followed Clint. After asking JARVIS where Tony was hauled up, they eventually found him hiding away in one of his many labs. He was working on one of his gauntlets, probably fixing something neither of them wanted to even attempt to understand. Clint, who seemed to have taken the lead on their little side mission, knocked a very melodic pattern on the door, causing Tony to glance up. Unlike Pepper, who greeted them with a smile, he looked indifferent and reluctantly moved away from his workstation to pull open the door.  "Yes?" He asked, waiting expectantly. Clint grinned. "We have questions." "You want a medal, Katniss?" "Whoa. Dial down the hostility for a second, will you?" "I was kinda in the middle of something." "And we won't take long-"  "Maybe we should discuss this another time." Steve offered, Bruce and Thor quickly agreeing.  "Oh, no, no, no, no." Clint insisted. "I'm too curious." Tony just looked bored. "Alright. What's up?" "We have used our above average intellectual abilities to deduce that you, Stark, have been hiding a secret." "Barton, you guys have the intellectual abilities of a teaspoon." "Okay, I'm going to conveniently ignore that horrific insult and cut right to the chase." His jokey demeanor faded. "We know about the kid." "What kid?" "Yours." The mood change was enough to make anyone uncomfortable. Tony's face dropped and his indifference quickly became a mix of surprise and anger. "I don't know what you're talking about." He shrugged. "Tony, we saw her picture." Steve said, his tone a lot more gentle than Clint's had been. "We got Pepper to tell us who she was." For the first time around them, he seemed genuinely uncomfortable, as if the mere mention of the girl was bringing back a lifetime of bad memories. "What is her name?" Thor asked. He didn't say anything for a minute, his face stone cold. "(Y/n)." "Lady Pepper mentioned she ran away. Why would she do that?" "Because I was a terrible father." "Tony, that's not true." Bruce tried to say. "You wouldn't know." He snapped. However, he quickly regretted it and sighed. "It's a long story." "We've got time." He scoffed and motioned for them to enter his lab. He let everyone get comfortable, as well as himself, before beginning to explain. "When I went missing years back, I left her behind. She was so much like me that I guess I got scared. I wasn't there for her. When I discovered it was Stane who organized the whole thing, he told me she'd discovered it too, and that he'd put a hit on her. I think she always wanted out, but that was the final push. Every day I blame myself and every damn day I miss her more than you'll ever understand. She just..." He tried to think of good enough words but it all came short. Instead, he lifted a hand to something around his neck, an intricate looking necklace. "This is all I have left of her." "I'm so sorry, Tony." Steve said. "I know words alone aren't enough, but we'll help you. We'll help you find her, whatever it takes." Tony didn't respond at first. He didn't particularly like Steve despite having saved the world together, but he did appreciate that gesture. "Why?" He asked. Steve smiled. "Because we're a team."  -Present Day- "(Y/n)..." Steve mumbled, his eyes wide. "She's been alive this whole time?" "Iron Man has a kid?" Sam questioned over comms, just as shocked. "She's been missing for years, we thought she was dead." "Well from what I just saw, I'm pretty sure she's alive and kicking." "It's..." He honestly didn't know what to say. "Hill, did you know about this?" There was a moment of pause before her voice also came through. "Yes." "Why didn't Tony know?" "It was at her own request. She didn't want him being in danger because of her." "Did y'all miss the part where she's got a glowing scepter?" Sam asked. "The hell is that about?" "It was the tool of a man playing a god." Steve explained. "Sam, can you get (Y/n)'s location?" There was another brief pause. "Got her. She's in the labs, 21st floor." "Find her and help her. Make sure she's safe." "You got it, Cap." - In the conference room, everyone had fallen silent again. No one knew quite what to say after seeing the one and only (Y/n) Stark announce her resurrection. Natasha broke the silence first. "You hid her from him for six years?" It was obvious to anyone that Fury knew all about it. Hiding someone and giving them a false life was textbook for him, no one would have expected any less, and he didn't exactly look shocked about it. "After so long." Pierce stated, smiling cruelly. "We finally have her."  "No, you don't." Fury argued. "You never will." Natasha was focused on the director with a hard gaze. Even she was struggling to believe what they'd just heard and seen. How could the girl who made most of their weapons be Tony's daughter? How had no one noticed when it now seemed so blatantly obvious. Why did you do it?" She asked. "She asked." Was all Fury replied. "But Stark-" "He didn't need to know." "He mourned her every day. The least he deserved was to know she was alive." "It would have comprised everything." As the two argued about it, Pierce glanced down at his hand where a small device was hiding. With it, he alerted a certain STRIKE commander about (Y/n)'s presence, along with orders to capture her and the scepter. -(Y/n) POV- You looked at the scientists in the room, all three of which were staring at you in complete awe. But you didn't have time to stop and pose. "Look, you're in danger if you're within thirty feet of this thing." You warned, motioning to the scepter in your hand. "You've gotta go." "What about you?" One of them asked, his voice trembling. "This is my final mission. Fury asked me to protect this thing, so I'm gonna." You opened the case again, putting it inside. "FRIDAY, find an escape route." After a moment, the voice filled your ear. "The ventilation system leads right outside the building." "Okay." You picked up the sealed case and looked at your company. "The vents connect to an outside system. If you want to get out in one piece, that's the way to go." You helped them open up the hatch and immediately the first two ran for it. The third, on the other hand, hesitated as he turned to you. It was the one you'd terrified by almost shooting him. "What if they catch you?" He asked. You shrugged. "I've got weapons." "But you don't have a suit." "Not every hero needs a suit to save the day." "But..." He trailed off, looking around the lab until he finally spotted something. "Take this." He held what looked like a bazooka gun. It was a surprisingly bright thing, with a circular slot at the top and at the end, meaning its rounds would be circular, much like your smoke bombs or acid balls. "It's not much but I hope you can use it." The scientist said. You nodded, thankful. "I appreciate it. And sorry for almost taking your kneecap off." A shy smile appeared on his face. "It's all good. Be safe, Miss Stark." With that, you parted ways. You ran with the case in hand, going for the top floor since it was the last place HYDRA would expect you to run. They'd probably have agents at the lower exits, not the top. However, it didn't mean no agents were lying in wait. You encountered a group of seven at first, all of whom trained their guns on you the second you came into view. They didn't waste a second and sent a hailstorm of bullets after you. You barely survived, sprinting for the corner and taking refuge behind the wall as the sound echoed. You dropped the case on the floor and grabbed the bazooka with both hands, loading it up with an acid ball first. Then you waited for the sound of reloading before peering around and pulling the trigger. The ball shot from the end and catapulted itself at the group, taking out two in one. The man and woman it hit screamed in agony as their flesh burned and hissed. By the time the other five had time to process, you'd already loaded up a smoke bomb and fired that too, blinding them. Remembering the brief training you underwent with Agent Hill during your initial stay at the Triskelion, you started by leaving cover and performing a graceful cartwheel, only to catch one of the agents with your foot and stagger him. You spun around with the bazooka still in one hand and backhanded him with it, sending him to the floor. In a movement so fluid it seemed like the same second, you smacked a female agent with your new gun. She stumbled forward from the impact and that time you went for an uppercut, sending her flying back instead. She crashed into the wall with a yell.  Moving on to number three, she took a swing at you but you dropped to the floor, instead sliding across and taking out her legs. You swung the bazooka with both hands that time, her now unconscious body sliding across the floor to join the others. Number two was next. You jumped to your feet as he ran at you, looking for a way to win. You spotted it with the wall and charged right back at him, rebounding off the solid structure at the last minute and using your entire body to take him down as you crashed into him. Once you were on the floor, you delivered a sharp punch to his face and knocked him out cold. Number one was last. He grabbed you from behind and lifted you up with an arm around your neck. You tried to fight but he was stronger than you, at least while he was in control anyway. He tried pushing you into one of the walls but you held your hands out to stop the contact. As his grip loosened at the premature stop, you took advantage and kicked off the wall with your feet. Then, with his grip released, you spun around and kicked him square in the chest, knocking him down. You picked up the bazooka, which had been dropped during the altercation, and brought it down on his head several times until he stopped moving. Breathless, you ran back to the wall you had hid behind at first and picked up the case again, continuing on your way up the building. Halfway up a set of stairs, you ran into a HYDRA agent cornering a SHIELD one. With no time to reload the bazooka, you raised your empty hand, the one that was decorated with the watch. You performed an intricate hand motion before suddenly several darts flew from the device, planting themselves into the HYDRA agent's neck. He dropped like a stone and the SHIELD guy stuttered a thanks that you were too quick to hear. You didn't stop, not until you finally reached the highest level of the Triskelion. Even then the only reason you stopped was because you felt a sudden burning pain in your shoulder as a bullet went through it. You collapsed to the ground, the case free of your grasp as it slid into one of the rooms. "What the hell?!" You gasped, gripping your bleeding wound. None other than Rumlow was approaching, his gun in hand. "I caught you, Campbell. Or should I say Stark?" You rolled your eyes, not in the mood for sarcasm, and tried to stand. It didn't work so well and you merely stumbled through the doorway where the scepter had gone. Rumlow followed, laughing at the state of you. He put his gun away to take the bazooka from you. "Not so tough now, huh?" You winced as the pain in your shoulder started to magnify. "Don't tell me your fighting technique is 90s one-liners. I don't have time for that." He laughed a second time. "Do you know how long we've waited for this? To finally take you out?" You raised a brow. "You're only taking me out if you're the one buying dinner." He scoffed. "You're just like Stark, you know that?" "Yeah." You forced a smile. "Sucks, doesn't it?" "Don't worry, we'll be the ones laughing... At your funeral." "Dude, again with the corny shit." When he went to retort, you leapt into action and took him by surprise, reaching for the scepter case. Rumlow grabbed you before you could, forcing you to stand on your feet. In retaliation, you threw a punch, but unfortunately he caught it and swung the bazooka, hitting the side of your face. The pain was like venom, burning everywhere. "Was that necessary?!" You yelled. Rumlow seemed to have finally shut up, however, and focused more on action. He hit you again and went for the case himself. You spat some blood out of your mouth and jumped on him from behind, arms around his neck. He made a sound of surprise but quickly backed into a wall, forcing you to let go. Then he threw the bazooka and grabbed you with both hands, lifting you off the ground before throwing you at the glass table in the room. It shattered on impact and you groaned in pain as tiny shards cut your skin. Rumlow grabbed the structure of the table and tossed it to the side, straddling your waist as he held you down with one hand and pressed his thumb into your shoulder with the other. You screamed in pure agony as more blood squirted from the bullet hole. "Daddy won't save you now." He spat, going for your throat. However, before he could choke the life out of you, someone else arrived on the scene and pulled him away. The stranger punched him several times until he was winded and then turned to you, offering a hand.

(This is the bazooka that reader is using)

I love you and I hate it - part 2

Summary: After your fight with Bucky, you put all your efforts into avoiding him, convinced that your friendship is over. Bucky, however, has other plans.

Pairing: Best Friend!Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader

Warnings: Reader being dramatic. Angst. Language maybe. Minimal use of Y/N. Fluff. My poor attempts at being funny.

Word Count: 4.5K

A/N: I promise I didn't mean to make it this long, but I couldn't help myself, again, and I didn't want to end on another 'cliffhanger' so here it is! hope you like it!

Part 1

Masterlist

Bucky can't believe what he just heard... You like him?

No, you used the word ‘love’. You love him.

Do you love him?

Certainly, he would’ve noticed if you did... Right? He is a trained assassin, he was taught how to see beyond people’s words and actions.

And he knows you, you can deny it all you want, but he knows you better than anyone. He knows you better than he knows himself.

And if he’s being honest, you know him better than anyone ever has, Steve included.

You feel safe, you feel calm. You feel like the peace he’s always wanted, the quiet he needs.

You feel like home. In a platonic way, of course.

Right?

His thoughts of you are interrupted by Sharon’s voice. He didn’t even realize he was back at the party.

"Where did you go?" she asks and, suddenly, her grip on his arm was just a little too tight for his liking. But it was probably nothing.

"I went to check if Y/N was okay."

"Oh." something in her voice felt wrong, but Bucky tried to ignore it, that is until what she said next.

"Why would you even care about her? All she does is embarrass you like before. She’s useful to no one, I heard the only reason she’s even on the team is because she slept her way to it." she laughed like it was the funniest thought in the world, and Bucky couldn’t ignore it anymore.

Not only was she saying hurtful, untrue things about his girl, but she has the audacity to laugh at her own cruelty?

"How dare you?" he does his best not to yell, but his tone still startles Sharon. "Y/N is the best agent in all of Shield, that’s why she got in the team! She’s not an embarrassment, she’s a valued member of our family and she’s my best friend! Of course I care about her, she’s the most important person in my life! Don’t ever talk about her that way again."

Sharon seems shocked at his words but, looking around, she realizes people are starting to stare so she tries her best to defuse the situation. "Alright, I’m sorry, I won’t say things like that again. Let’s just calm down and have a nice rest of the evening, ok?"

In his head Bucky knew her request was reasonable, he could forget about this and keep having fun with his girlfriend. But in his heart he just knew he couldn’t let it go.

The words were coming out of his mouth before he can stop them, not that he even wants to.

"You know what, Sharon? This isn’t working. We have to break up." He doesn’t even give her a chance to say anything before he’s turning around and making his way to his room.

Meanwhile, on the roof, Steve’s trying to talk you down the ledge. Metaphorically speaking, obviously. 

"He hates me, Steve." you can't stop the tears.

"Stop saying that, sweetheart, he doesn’t hate you."

"You saw what happened at the party, the way he looked at me. And he heard me say that I love him and walked away like it was nothing." You sniffle. "If he didn’t hate me before, this certainly pushed him off the edge."

Steve has nothing to say to that, he knows Bucky doesn't hate you, but he also knows that you’re too stubborn to hear any reason, especially not right now when you're in the eye of the tornado and can't see a way out.

Right now you need a friend and shoulder to cry on, usually Bucky would take on that role, but, given the circumstances, Steve decides to step up and be that friend.

He wraps his arms around your crying body and holds you as you let it all out. Neither of you say anything else, the only sounds in the dark of the night being your sobs, until eventually you calm down and after a few moments of silence Steve glances down to see you fell asleep. 

Not wanting to wake you he carefully picks you up and makes his way to the elevator.

When he gets to the floor you both reside in he finds Sam and Natasha chatting at the kitchen counter, probably about to go to bed after coming up from the party.

Sam gives him a confused look, while Nat seems to understand what is going on right away as she moves without saying a word, walking ahead of Steve towards your room.

She opens the door for him and walks in behind, moving the covers back as he lays you on your bed as carefully as he can, and then Nat delicately takes your heels off before covering you with the duvet.

As they’re leaving your room the door opposite yours opens, revealing a hopeful Bucky but when he sees it’s not you, his face becomes stoic once again. He’s about to ask where you are when Natasha beats him to the punch.

"Leave her alone, Barnes. You’ve hurt her enough already." Is all she says before she steps into her own bedroom.

Bucky looks to his best friend for help but, at his confused face, the blonde super soldier just shakes his head in disappointment and walks away without a word.

Bucky stands there for a few minutes, just staring at your door like he's gonna will you to open it and talk to him.

He sighs and goes back to his room where he spends the next few hours overthinking about you and this whole night, eventually falling into an uneasy sleep.

The next morning when you wake up you feel at peace for about 10 seconds before the events of last night hit you like a truck, and all you can feel is humiliation.

How can you face the team after they witnessed your fight with Bucky?

How can you face Steve after he saw you at your most vulnerable and, apparently, carried you to bed after you cried yourself to sleep?

How can you face Bucky after he heard you say you love him and he walked away from you?

You can’t, that’s the answer.

Should you just move out? Just quit the team, ask Hill to be reassigned? Maybe you could even get transferred to another country...

You’re not overreacting, right? This is a very embarrassing situation and you have every right to want to run away from all of it.

As you’re making up an escape plan in your mind you hear a knock on your door, followed by Steve’s voice. "Hey, are you awake? We just want to make sure you're okay…"

You try to be as silent as you can, slowing down your breathing praying he’ll think you’re sleeping.

You can hear him exchange some muffled words with what sounds like Natasha, and then you hear their footsteps as they walk away, so you let out a relieved sigh.

Okay, step one is definitely getting out of this room, it’s just the most obvious place where to look for you.

You get up and out of your awfully classy dress, take a shower being sure to clean away all the makeup from last night and put on the most comfortable sweats you own.

Just as you’re opening the door you can see Bucky opening his about to get out and, in a panic move, you run back inside your room and slam the door shut.

Very subtle, yes.

You rest your back against the door and can hear him sigh and then walk away.

You wait a few minutes, just to be sure, and then relax a little. Your plan was to go to the gym and work out a bit, but now all you can think about is getting the hell out of this compound.

You grab your purse, make sure to have your phone and keys in it and open the door, making sure no one’s around before getting out.

You’re practically running, taking the stairs for good measure, and in a flash you’re at the garage. You jump in your car and drive away as fast as you can without breaking the law, not even knowing where to go.

Once you’re in the city you stop at a cafe for breakfast near your favorite book store, the one you and Bucky have visited together a hundred times.

Okay, stop that. No more thinking about Bucky.

You spend the rest of the day just going from one store to the other, stopping to have lunch at the diner you always go to when you’re in the city, and trying not to kick yourself for not being able to stop thinking about Bucky.

Seriously, why can’t you stop thinking about him?

It doesn’t help the fact that every one of your favorite places has at least a hundred and twelve memories of Bucky.

God, have you ever gone anywhere on your own in the last two years?

The more memories come to mind the more you think that maybe transferring wouldn’t be such a bad idea. Go somewhere new, get a fresh start.

When it starts getting dark you decide to drive back to the compound, but when you park and turn the car off you can’t find it in yourself to get out.

You take out your phone, which you’ve been ignoring all day, and go through all the messages of your worried friends, hating yourself a little more when you catch yourself looking for his name in your notifications.

Just as you’re about to answer Tony’s texts first, you get a call from Steve. You stare at your phone, unsure if you can stomach answering him right now, but your decision is rendered moot when someone taps against your car window.

Your head snaps towards it and you let out a breath of relief when you see Steve standing there, holding his phone and using it to tap on your window again.

You close your eyes for a second but resign to your fate as you gather your things and get out of the car.

When you lock your car you turn to see that Steve moved to be leaning on the trunk of your car, so you join him and wait for him to say something, not knowing what to say yourself.

"So," he starts, with his arm folded in front of his chest and looking at his shoes "you’re avoiding all of us now?" You let out a sigh, feeling bad for hurting his feelings.

"I’m sorry, Steve. I just…" you can’t even look at him as you talk, so you just look ahead of you at all the cars "I’m just embarrassed. After everything that happened last night, I don’t know… God, you even carried me to bed like a child." you cover your face with your hands.

You finally look at him when you hear him chuckling. "That’s what friends do, Y/N. They lean on each other." he bumps your shoulder with his playfully.

"I know we’re not as close as you and Bucky, but I am your friend too. I’m not gonna judge you for last night, I just want to make sure you’re okay. That’s what we all want. You made us worry that you might run away on us." He says the last part as a joke, but you can’t help looking away from him.

That’s exactly what you wanted to do.

You bite your lip as he keeps looking at you and you feel like he can see the gears turning in your head, like your thoughts are so loud and your guilt so visible that he knows right away he was right on the money.

"Y/N…" it’s almost a warning, but you still can’t find the courage to look at him. "You were seriously thinking of running away?!" he seems almost shocked.

"Okay, it’s not like I’m a teenager running away in the middle of the night after a fight with her parents!" you finally look at him. "I was just considering… I don’t know, maybe asking for a transfer?"

"So you actually want to leave the team just because you had a fight with Bucky?" He scoffs.

"It’s not just the fight, Steve, he knows I love him and he doesn’t even care!" You yell before sighing and lovering your voice.

"Do you realize how much that hurts? And now I’m supposed to, what? Just go back to how things used to be? Pretend like nothing happened? Even if we’re not friends anymore, he lives across the hall from me! I’m bound to see him and it’s gonna hurt every fucking time!" You’re almost crying, again, but you hold back not wanting to go through that again and you look away.

"I know it hurts, trust me, sweetheart, but… what about us?" you look at him again as he goes on. "We’re your team too. We’re your friends, we’re your family... You can’t just leave us. I'm not saying it's gonna be easy, but we can help you make it better. We all care about you a lot." It’s honestly a miracle you’re not crying already. You feel him take your hand, but don’t look away from his face.

"Please let us help you." you squeeze his hand and nod, not trusting your voice not to break and the flood to hit as soon as you open your mouth.

He smiles at you and you can’t help but do the same. "Good. Then let’s go up and have dinner like we always do." He starts walking and taking you with him, his hand still in yours.

While you’re waiting for the elevator you can’t hold yourself back as you turn to him and give him a tight hug. "Thank you."

He hugs you back just as tight. "Anytime, rookie." you snort and let go of him, giving him a punch in the arm you’re sure he didn’t even feel as he laughs with you.

When you get to the big kitchen most of the team is already there and you sit down next to Natasha while Steve sits at her other side.

The seat next to you is quickly occupied by Sam as he bings the pizza to the table. He gives you a side hug and squeezes your arm in sympathy but aside from that nobody even mentioned what happened last night, which you're grateful for.

You eat like always, having conversations, laughing and teasing each other like normal, you didn’t feel like anyone was pitying you and you realized Steve was right: these people are your family, you could never leave them.

And, as you watch Loki and Peter trying to make you laugh by messing with Thor’s hair, putting tiny umbrellas in it while he's not looking, you just know they’re gonna help you through everything.

What makes you sad to notice is that one brooding super soldier is missing, though you don’t bring it up for fear of opening that particular door.

And that’s how you spend the next few weeks: avoiding anything and everything that has to do with Bucky, including the man himself.

You start training with Natasha and realize how easy Bucky went on you.

You do more missions with Sam and Steve and realize that missions aren't as fun for everybody as they were for you and Bucky.

You hang out during your down time with pretty much everyone and realize that you couldn’t have as much fun with everyone as you had with Bucky.

So yeah, as much as you could avoid Bucky and talking about him to anybody, he lived rent free in your head.

Fun, huh?

It also didn’t help the look that Steve gave you every time you basically ran out of a room as soon as you caught a glimpse of your former best friend. 

Everybody noticed the change in your friendship, but it felt like they all took a silent oath to not mention anything to either of you, and you were glad they were respecting your choice to stay away from Bucky.

He, on the other hand, was going crazy.

He hasn’t seen you in weeks, except for those few seconds before you realize he’s in the same room and run away.

He doesn’t hear your voice unless he’s eavesdropping on you with someone else, but even then he never hears his name come out of your mouth.

Nobody will tell him anything about you, the only thing he can get out of Steve is ‘she’s okay, just give her time’.

He’s been trying his best to give you the space you need, but he feels like he’ll lose his mind if he doesn’t hear you say his name soon.

It’s been a month of successfully and not so subtly avoiding Bucky.

There was one time where, as the team about to land for a mission, he got much too close to you for your liking and you thought he was about to say something so you grabbed a parachute and quite literally jumped out the jet, then walked the rest of the way to the Hydra base.

Everyone had to wait for you, some annoyed, but most found the situation too amusing to be bothered by it.

Anyway. 

You’re at the gym for an early morning workout, a habit you took to when you started avoiding Bucky.

You know he usually stays up at night. Occasionally because he still gets nightmares, usually because his overthinking mind tortures him until early hours. So he uses mornings to sleep in when he doesn’t have missions.

You’re on the treadmill when you hear the doors of the gym open behind you but think nothing of it, assuming it’s just Steve replacing his morning run with a workout because it’s too hot to run outside.

When you don’t hear him say anything, you’re about to turn your head to see who it is, but before you can do anything you feel two hands, one cold and one hot, on your waist.

You squeal when they pick you up and take you away from the treadmill, setting you down on the ground in front of it before turning off the machine.

"Bucky, what the fuck?! I could’ve gotten hurt!" you were so shocked you didn’t even fully realize you were actually talking to the person you’ve spent so much time and effort avoiding, or that you were walking backwards while Bucky was getting closer to you.

"Oh please, I’d ever let you get hurt." he’s sounds almost amused, like this is a normal thing between you two, but the truth is he’s just happy that you’re actually talking to him.

When your back hits the wall you realize too late that it’s Bucky in front of you and suddenly you’re looking around you to find a way to escape. But all you find is that he’s successfully trapped you between the wall and his body, his hands on the wall at either side of your head.

You swallow hard and if he notices he doesn’t say anything, but your brain is too busy registering the warmth of his body so close to yours to even be ashamed right now.

"Is this the only way I’ll get to talk to you now?" you almost miss his question, your eyes snapping up to meet his and, where you expected to see a smug look at having caught you not only off guard but also ogling, you found a frown and a slight pout.

Something about the hurt on his face stopped you from lying or straight up kicking him so he’d move and you could run away.

No, Bucky was your best friend, you’ve always felt the need to be honest with him ever since that first day, and even now you owe it to him to tell him nothing but the truth.

"I just need time." You hoped he understood.

"How much more time do you need?" Apparently not.

"I don’t know, can’t you just be patient?" You can't believe you really have to ask him this.

"It’s been a month, doll, I think I’ve been plenty patient. Are you planning on avoiding me forever?"

"Not forever… just… I don’t know." If you were being honest with yourself, you didn’t know how long you would’ve kept on avoiding him.

You were so busy doing the actual avoiding that you didn’t take the time to think about when you’d be able to stop.

You let out a sigh, but didn’t look away from his eyes for a second. He needs to know you meant every word you're about to say. "I was hurting, Bucky. I still am. I get that you have a girlfriend-"

"I broke up with her." he interrupts you.

"You… What?" you weren’t expecting that. "When?"

"The night of our fight. I would’ve told you sooner but it was hard to catch you, you know, with you avoiding me and everything."

You almost lost your train of thought, but it didn’t matter that he was single, he was still the first one to walk away, why was it so wrong for you to do it now?

"It doesn’t matter… I know you don’t owe me anything, but you walked away from me. From my feelings." you can see Bucky’s confusion so, before he can say anything, you explain yourself.

"That night on the roof. I know you were there, you heard me say that I loved you and you walked away like it was nothing. Like I was nothing. I know you don’t like me like that, and I can live with that in time, but it hurt. It still hurts." you don’t know what you were expecting him to say, but it definitely wasn’t he says next.

"Do you remember the day we met?" you furrow your brows in confusion but he waits for you to nod before he keeps going. "We’ve never really talked about it, have we? It's ironic since we’ve talked about pretty much every topic we could possibly come up with. But that day, you introduced yourself and I just got up and walked away. Kind of what you’ve been doing this past few weeks."  he chuckles a bit and you have the impression he's getting closer to your face, but you're probably just imagining that.

"Yeah, I thought I did something wrong, but you were just a rude bitch." he laughs and you can’t help but smile.

"I’m sorry about that, I just… the second I saw you I felt weird. And when you talked to me it was too much, I couldn’t handle it. I didn’t know what I was feeling and my brain just screamed at me to get out, so I did. Then you came to my door and said all those nice things and that weird feeling started to feel more and more comfortable as you talked. It was nice. Then we became friends and I guess I just dismissed that feeling as friendship. It was a different type of friendship that I’d never had... But then again I’ve never been this close to a woman. Emotionally speaking, of course." His hand comes to cup your cheek and you can’t speak, so he takes the opportunity to say everything he needs to say.

"This month has been hell for me, doll. I’ve missed you more than I’ve ever missed anybody in my entire life. Not being able to spend time with you, joke around, talk to you, barely even see you. It's been driving me insane. Being away from you for so long made me realize what that feeling was. You’re not just my best friend, you’re my person. You’re my calm, and my reason. You’re my happiness, my home. You’re the love of my life."

"What?" you're basically whispering, so quietly you’re sure he wouldn’t have heard you if he didn’t have super hearing.

"I love you too, doll. I love you." he holds your face in his hands "I love you."

You feel like your brain shut down all of a sudden. You barely know how to breathe, let alone talk. All you can do is stare at him, the look he's giving you making you weak in the knees.

"You’re killing me here, doll. For the love of god, say something, angel." The nickname seems to snap you out of it, and there's only one thing in your mind left to ask.

"If you love me, why didn’t you tell me on the roof?" He let out a deep sigh, you can feel his breath on your lips, but you try your hardest to focus on his words and not his lips.

"For one I was still with Sharon. And I didn’t really know what I was feeling. Also, I wasn’t even sure you were serious. Honestly, I was just confused about the whole thing, and still mad about the fight. Nothing good would’ve come from me staying and talking to you that night. I probably would’ve ended up hurting you more." All that makes a lot of sense, sure, but it doesn't change the fact that it hurt.

The look in Bucky’s face at the moment though makes you want to forgive him right this second and let this whole thing go. Pretend like the last month didn’t happen. 

So that’s what you do.

"What if…" you start, looking back and forth between his eyes and his lips "what if we forget all of this happened?"

"No." he answered so fast and firmly that it made you furrow your eyebrows in confusion and disappointment. "I don’t want to forget anything about us, doll. Good or bad, it’s all worth it, as long as it ends with you in my arms."

You're melting and can't hold yourself back, you grab his face and bring his lips down to yours.

He freezes, probably not expecting it, but when you're about to pull away, he holds your face to keep you there, deepening the kiss.

After a few moments you hear someone clear their throat and almost throw Bucky off of you, looking behind him while he turns to see who it is and you see Steve and Sam standing there, amused looks on their faces.

"We were just talking." You blurted out and Sam cracked and almost doubled over with laughter.

"Really?" Steve said while raising an eyebrow, almost exasperated and knowing damn well what you were doing.

"Sure they were, Steve, she was obviously trying to get the word out of his mouth!" Sam said to the blonde, still laughing his ass off.

"Oh, of course she was. Tell us, sweetheart, what did you find in Bucky’s mouth?" Steve was now laughing too, and you were so embarrassed you hid your face in Bucky’s chest.

He wrapped his arms around you, barely glaring at the two laughing idiots. "Ok, just get out of here, punks." Fortunately for once in their lives they decided to actually listen and left, their laughs echoing through the halls.

"You okay there, doll?" Bucky was now chuckling at your embarrassment.

You raised your head and, meeting his eyes, you said "I can’t believe Captain Dumbass is making fun of us for kissing."

He started laughing and you gladly joined him, looking forward to making up for the time you missed with him, unknowingly promising each other to never let go of the other ever again.

taglist: @mostlymarvelgirl @spookyparadisesheep @scott-loki-barnes @pattiemac1 @emerald-writes @sapphirebarnes

Chapter 4: Captain America: The Winter Soldier - Partners in crime

Part 8:

“It was him. He looked right at me like he didn't even know me,” Steve looked in front of him, still in shock.

“How's that even possible? It was like seventy years ago.” Sam thought out loud.

“I met him months ago and he didn’t recognize me, don’t take it personally,” I said. “Zola. Bucky's whole unit was captured in '43, Zola experimented on him. Whatever he did helped Bucky survive the fall. They must have found him and…”

“None of that's your fault, Steve,” Natasha said, leaning back, her shoulder still bleeding. “Even when I had nothing, I had Bucky,” Steve mumbled. “Steve, get your head out of your ass. She’s gonna bleed out if we don’t get a doctor and you’re daydreaming about your long-lost friends. Can we not focus on you for one second?” I raised my voice. He was surprised by the quick mood change but then nodded.

Suddenly one of the guards pulled out an electric rod and neutralized the other guard and knocked him out. The guard took off their helmet and to everyone’s surprise, it was Hill. “Ah. That thing was squeezing my brain,” she complained. “Who's this guy?” She asked, referring to Sam. “You’re kidding, right? I was ready to stab you if you didn’t do anything,” I said and she just shrugged.

***

Helping Natasha out of the car, Maria led us into a compound thing, which was deep in a forest. Walking through a tunnel, a man jogged toward us. “GSW. She's lost at least a pint,” said Maria, to who I’m guessing is a doctor. “Maybe two,” I murmured as I saw the blood gushing through her fingers as Nat held pressure on the wound. “Let me take her,” offered the doctor. “She'll want to see him first,” we all looked at Maria then quickly found ourselves in front of an iron door. “He’s alive, isn’t he?” Natasha spoke weakly, anger crossing her face. The agent just nodded and I pushed open the door out of frustration.

And there he was, Nicky Fury laying in a hospital bed behind a plastic curtain. “You piece of shit, Fury! Should’ve seen this coming,” I walked closer to him. “About damn time…”

We all gathered around his bed, while Nat was getting treated. The squeeze of her hand and the scrunch of her nose was a sign that it was most definitely painful. “Lacerated spinal column, cracked sternum, shattered collarbone, perforated liver, one hell of a headache,” Fury listed his injuries. “Don't forget your collapsed lung.” “Oh, let's not forget that. Otherwise, I'm good.” “I don’t see how that is good…” Maria and I shared a look but she just shrugged.

“They cut you open, your heart stopped,” Natasha’s worried voice was something we don’t hear often. “Tetrodotoxin B. Slows the pulse to one beat a minute. Ban-” “I made that for Banner, his stress. For a Hulk, not a human. And it didn’t work on him. Are you out of your mind Nick?” I stepped forward and he shook his head. “He tested it before I used it.” “Why all the secrecy? Why not just tell us?” Steve questioned. “Any attempt on the director's life had to look successful.” “Can't kill you if you're already dead. Besides, I wasn't sure who to trust…” Glancing at Tash I could see how hurt she was from that. Since I’ve known her, she had problems with trusting in others but nobody thinks about their trust in her. People are so quick to judge because she was a spy, but she would be the first person that I’d trust with my life.

“Can we clean up somewhere?” I turned to Maria and she nodded. Reached my hand out to Nat and she took it then we followed Maria.

I asked for some clean clothes from Hill and washed all the dirt off of my body, but Natasha sat still, looking straight ahead. Wetting a smaller towel, I sat next to her. “Look at me please,” I said lowly and she turned her head but looked past my shoulder.

Gently cleaning her face, I didn’t want to bother her thinking but I know she was hurt. The empty look in her eyes was painful to see. “Nobody knew Nat,” going over the bloody part of her shoulder, she still didn’t speak. “Tell me you wouldn't have done the same thing, tell me that you would have told me or him, that you were planning on faking your death,” her eyes were quick to meet with mine. She didn’t understand my sudden mood change, but I needed her to listen. “Nick would put his life in your hands. Don’t ever doubt his trust, Tash. It was better this way, believe me,” “Don’t defend him,” she murmured. “I’m not defending him, I’m trying to protect you, Natalia. What if you knew and Barnes found you, hm?” “He wouldn’t hurt me,” she shrugged. “Why wouldn’t he?” I looked at her with a frown and she looked down then stood up with a sigh. “Talk to me.” I straightened up but stayed put.

Natasha was pacing the room. Then spoke. “As you know he became a trainer in the Red Room after I had my graduation. He was controlled then too, but much less. And he didn’t get missions at the time so he was there a lot,” she said. “The important part is?” I interfered. “We had an affair, okay? For years, and I didn’t want you to know because everything happened with him it was with my consent but with you it was different.” Her words were shocking. “How? How was that possible?” I shook my head out of disbelief, feeling my throat tighten up. “I was young and I thought I was in love. He was one of the only real human interactions that I had left.” “How did it end?” At that point, I couldn’t even look at her. “They caught us. He was taken immediately and hasn't seen him for at least a decade after that.” “You could’ve at least told me, Nat. Yes, it is a sensitive subject but damn this… I thought we were done with secrets,” I stood up and buried my head in my hands. “Gosh… This was the last thing I would’ve thought of as a problem. The problem is not even who, but why didn’t you tell me? I shared my whole life with you, and I was patient and understanding but I guess I’m still not enough to have your trust, huh?” I spread my arms getting angrier. “Y/n you know it’s hard for me to open up, and you accepted that when we got into a relationship,” Nat spoke up. “Yes, but we’ve been together for some time but sorry for assuming that you would trust me after this.” “I do trust you,” her calm demeanor was very frustrating. “No, you don’t. Natasha, I barely know anything about your past. Other than the Red Room, I know nothing,” I let my voice rise because I was just tired and I was not having her denial. “Why is that important?” Her voice got louder too, but I was ready to end this conversation. “You know what, please don’t talk to me until you learn about how a relationship works. I really tried my best to help you see it, but you just don’t want to so… let’s forget this until then.”

***

Sitting around the table, we were trying to go over the plan, but it was damn hard to focus when I basically just broke up with my girlfriend and she was sitting in front of me. Uncomfortable, that’s what it was.

Fury was just staring at a picture of Pierce. “This man declined the Nobel Peace Prize. He said, "Peace wasn't an achievement, it was a responsibility." See, it's stuff like this that gives me trust issues,” he grumbled. Thanks, Nick, fuel the fire with your thoughts on trust issues. “We have to stop the launch.” “I don't think the Council's accepting my calls anymore,” said Fury and opened up a case with three chips in it. “What’s that?” Asked Sam. “Once the Helicarriers reach three thousand feet, they'll triangulate with Insight satellites becoming fully weaponized,” Maria let us know the information, showing us the screen. “We need to breach those carriers and replace their targeting blades with our own.” “They are all connected, right?” I asked and Hill nodded. “One or two won't cut it. We need to link all three carriers for this to work, because if even one of those ships remains operational a whole lot of people are gonna die.” “We have to assume everyone aboard those carriers is HYDRA. We need to get past them, insert the server blades, and maybe, just maybe, we can salvage what's left…” “We're not salvaging anything. We're not just taking down the carriers, Nick, we're taking down SHIELD,” spoke Steve with his usual heroic voice, trying to play angel. Yeah, I’m mad at everybody at the moment. “SHIELD had nothing to do with it,” said Nick. “You gave me this mission, this is how it ends. SHIELD's been compromised, you said so yourself. HYDRA grew right under your nose and nobody noticed,” Steve pressed. “Why do you think we're meeting in this cave? I noticed.” He really did, the note he left. “And how many paid the price before you did?” This is getting personal. “Look, I didn't know about Barnes.” “Even if you have, would you have told me? Or would you have compartmentalized that too? SHIELD, HYDRA, it all goes,” I’m taking a break after this for sure if there’s an after. “He's right,” Nick looked around the others, then me. “I still have a job if SHIELD falls,” with a shrug, I leaned back in my chair. “Well... Looks like you're giving the orders now, Captain.”

Battle Scars by Paradise Fears

Summary: You are an empath living in the Avenger Towers. It isn’t your job to help the Avengers when their feelings get out of control but you do it anyway. What happens when you go on a mission and now the empath needs help? 

Warning: mentions of guilt, depression, anger, doubt, sadness (all of the emotions and past traumas of specific Avengers), human trafficking 

Word Count: 7.5k

Please read the end note after this story! It would mean the world to me and my family

Growing up was hard. You were constantly tired as you feed into the emotions of those around you. It started with a tight feeling in your chest as if a ton of bricks were resting there. Then the feeling moved to the base of your head, almost like a headache. Soon you began to feel whatever that person was feeling. It could be anger, grief, sadness, depression and on the off chance; happiness, joy, or pleasure. As you got older you learned to control it. It only took real intense emotions that would call on your mutant powers. So living with the Avengers was a challenge. They were intense people with even bigger emotions. You drank calming tea, meditated, and journaled to keep your own emotions in check. You weren’t a full time member of the team - you spent a majority of the time in the lab with Bruce and Tony. It was rare that you saw action in the field but you were prepared when duty called. Like this past weekend. The world seemed to be on a different level and the Avengers were sent to all corners to deal with rising threats. You were in the compound when Maria approached you with a mission report. You took it without hesitation and now as you sat in your room, a blanket wrapped around you tightly -protecting you from the world, you wished you told Maria no.

The mission went south as soon as you stepped down in Uganda, you were working closely with the Wakandans. Numerous reports of children going mission and the rumors of a human trafficking ring, meant you and T’Challa had to work fast before they left the country. You weren’t fast enough. You closed your eyes, wishing for the images of inside the shipping containers would leave your mind. Sometimes you wished the others had your ability so they knew you were hurting and they could come to you like you’ve done so many times for them. 

*

Steve Rogers; Captain America 

FRIDAY announced the arrival of the team but you knew they were back as soon the quinjet landed. Guilt. It was a powerful emotion and it was confusing one of your teammates and in turn, consuming you. You closed your laptop and headed to the elevator. Before you pressed the button, the door opened and Tony was leaning on the metal wall. “Tons, are you okay?” He nodded, pushed himself off the wall, and walked out the elevator. He didn’t look injured, just exhausted. 

“It’s not me you're feeling El,” He said, placing a hand on your shoulder walking into the lap. El wasn’t your real name, it was your given name by the Avengers as your birth name carried too much trauma. It was short for elephant as Vision let slip that elephants were some of the most empathic creatures. But you weren’t a big fan of being called an elephant so El was the next best thing. “What happened?” You asked, following the billionaire. He became a father figure to you since your parents disowned you when you told them you were going to join the Avengers. Tony fell into his chair, pinching the bridge of his nose. The mission was supposed to be a recon on an old HYDRA facility. There were rumors of a new super solider serum and Fury wanted the Avengers to get their hands on it before someone else did. Steve, Tony, Sam, Natasha, and Maria were sent on the mission - that was a week ago. 

“Mission went sideways. It was a trap.” Your stomach dropped. “Wilson and Romonaff are in medbay.” 

“How bad?” You asked. 

“Wilson broke his arm. Romonaoff got it worse - she got a nasty hit to the head. She was unconscious the entire ride back home.” You nodded. “It’s Steve.” Tony whispered. “Steve is who you are feeling, tread lightly.” You gave him a smile and walked back to the elevator, asking FRIDAY where the super soldier was. The AI informed you that Captain Rogers was in the training room - he asked to be alone. You huffed as your rode the elevator to the training room. You wondered if you should have made a stop at medbay but you knew Dr. Cho would have her hands full and Yelena and Bucky would be down there. It was a quick walk to the training room when the elevator stopped. You were greeted with darkness, the windows were covered and a majority of the lights were off besides one. The soldier was illuminated by the light and was punching a sandbag. A pile was forming of ones he destroyed. Oh Steve, you thought, leaning on the door frame. With a hard swing from his right hand, the sandbag broke off the chain and flew towards the wall. 

“You know,” You said, making your presence known. Steve’s shoulders tense up. “I don’t think Tony would appreciate how you are treating the building's equipment.” Steve sighed. 

“I was wondering how long I had before you found me.” You hummed, pushing yourself off the walk and walked over to the soldier. Your footsteps echoed against the wall. 

“I’d say 4 sandbags.” You joked. Steve smiled. “FRIDAY, open the window.” The AI listened to your request and the New York sun lit up the darkness. “Please advise the other Avengers that the training room is off limits.” 

“Understood, El.” 

“I gave FRIDAY that same order but it appears it didn’t work.” You shrugged, sitting on the floor, and patted the empty space next to you. Steve stared at the empty spot and you gave the stubborn captain a pointed look - he sat down next to you. With him being this close, you could feel his guilt. It was suffocating. 

“What’s your favorite part of the day?” You asked, looking forward. He didn’t answer so you answered your question. “Mine is dawn. Dawn means to become day in old English so it’s the first sight of lightness in the morning.” You explained, looking at Steve. He was wondering about your answer. “Do you know why dawn is my favorite?” He shook his head. 

“Why?” He questioned, his voice shaking. 

“Because,” You said slowly. “No matter how dark it is there will be light towards the end. It may take some time but light will over power the darkness.” Steve let out a shaky breath and his blue eyes were glossy with tears.

“It’s so hard,” his voice cracked. “It is so hard to make the final call and it is possible that one of you or all of you don’t return home.” You laced your hand with his. 

“Sam and Natasha are going to be okay.” You said. “You brought them home.” He shook his head. 

“We got lucky this time. What if we aren’t so lucky next time?” He asked. It was a valid question, a question you didn’t have an answer to. This job was filled with uncertainties and a million ‘What if?’ questions. 

“Then we deal with it together because you are not alone and keep marching on. We’ve all got battle scars and you’ve had enough just don’t give up.” You gave his hand a a tight squeeze. “This is worth fighting for. You are worth fighting for.” You watched as a few tears slid down his face. His guilt was still there but it wasn’t as strong. 

“Thank you.”

“Captain Rogers,” FRIDAY’s voice called out. “Dr. Cho wanted me to inform you that Miss. Romanoff is requesting to see you.” You saw the tension leave his shoulders. You gently patted him on the bag. 

“Go get her tiger.” Steve got to his feet quickly, stumbling slightly. You giggle at the flush of embarrassment that graced his cheeks. He gave you a grateful smile and jogged to Medbay. You sighed, leaning back and closed your eyes. You liked the quote by Umar Iban Al-Khattab: ‘No amount of guilt can change the past and no amount of worrying can change the future.’ 

*

Yelena Belova; White Widow 

It wasn’t a normal occurrence for you when sleep avoided you. You laid in bed; hands behind your head as you stared up at the ceiling. A sudden rush of anger passed through you. The strong emotion took your breath away. It was anger mixed with sadness. You slowly sat up. “FRIDAY, who is up right now?” You asked the AI. 

“Miss. Belova is in the kitchen and The Boss is in the lab with Mr. Banner.” You nodded, grabbing a sweatshirt from (you were pretty sure the sweatshirt belonged to Steve) and a pair of fluffy socks. The compound was always freezing at night. You left your room and walked the empty and dark halls to the kitchen. You figured you were feeling Yelena’s range of emotions. She returned from a mission with her sister, they were going on a recon mission to a lab. They’re primary object was to sneak in and steal some intel. You reached the kitchen and saw Yelena sitting at the counter, two bottles of vodka out and a shot glass. She saw you immediately so you didn’t have a chance to watch her. Instead you gave her a friendly smile, grabbed two spoons from the drawer and opened the freezer. Chocolate ice cream. Perfect. You closed the freezer and leaned against the counter. Yelena’s green eyes never left you.  

Yelena was a new addition to the team and you knew she was cactious of you, Natasha must have told her about your ability. You offered her the extra spoon. “Want soom?” You offered. She looked at the spoon then the ice cream. 

“No.” She said, simply. You shrugged, putting the spoon down and opened the ice cream. 

“If you change your mind, the offer still stands.” You took a spoonful and ate it. Out of the corner of your eye, you watched the White Widow take a shot and fill it again. 

“Isn’t that Sam’s ice cream?” She questioned. You looked at the container and saw in horrible penmanship Sam’s name and a drawing of a falcon. You smiled.  

“What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” You almost dropped your spoon as the smile graced the Russian’s face. A wave of silence passed you two as you ate ice cream and she drank her vodka. Soon you noticed Yelenba looking at the spoon. She took it slowly and you pushed the ice cream container closer to her. “What’s your favorite ice cream?” You asked. She thought for a moment, took a spoonful and ate the chocolate ice cream. 

“Mint chocolate chip.” You scrunted your nose. She laughed, throwing you head back. “What? It’s not good?” You shook your head. 

“Not for me.” You mumbled. Her laughter made you smile. Her earlier feelings of anger and sadness were disappearing but they were lingering.

“So what is your favorite ice cream?” She asked. 

“Rocky road.” You said without hesitation. “I have good memories with my parents sitting at a pond, eating rocky road and watching the ducks.” You said, sighing. You couldn’t tell if this overwhelming sadness was your own emotion or Yelena’s. 

“I like mint chocolate chip because it reminds me of a time before the Red Room.” She stopped, taking another shot of vodka. You didn’t prompt the blonde to continue, hoping she would on her own. “Alexi took Natasha and I to a small ice cream shop. We had to stay in the car and he didn’t know what ice cream flavor kids liked so he got us mint chocolate.” You smiled as you listened to her talk. “Natasha didn’t like it but I ate all of mine.” She sighed. Yup, you thought, the sadness was coming from her. Her jaw clenched as she threw back another shot. The anger was back. “I hate them so much.” She confessed. 

“Who do you hate, Yelena?” You asked softly. She looked at you, blinking her green eyes at you. She shook her head. 

“Nobody,” she said suddenly. “It’s not important. You have more important things to do.” She stood, gathered her bottles of liquor, and shot glasses. “Thank you for sharing ice cream.” You stared blankly as the White Widow headed back to her room. You broke out of your trance and ran after her. 

“Yelena,” her name stopped her. “You’ve had enough, just don’t give up. You are worth fighting for. You know we’ve all got battle scars. Just keep marching on.” She didn’t respond or turn around to look at you. “You are not alone.” Her body began to shake. 

“I’m angry at Natasha, Alexi, and Melina.” She answered, turning to face you with tears coming down her cheeks. “Why did they give me back to the Red Room? Why didn’t Natasha come back for me?” You weren’t sure if she wanted you to answer or she was just throwing these questions to the universe. “We got separated on our mission and I found my way out of the lap and I couldn’t find Natasha. I thought she left me again.” Her hands tightened around the neck of the bottle. “I don’t want to be alone again.” You took a few tentative steps towards the Russian, closing the distance. 

“You aren’t alone.” You said, taking the glass out of her hands. “As long as I’m here you won’t be alone.” She looked into your eyes, looking for any lie in your words. She chuckled, whipping away her tears. 

“Natasha was right. You are a weird one.” You laughed, throwing your head back. 

“I’ll take that as a compliment. Come on, let's go watch a movie.” You held out your freehand and the Russian took it. 

*

Bucky Barnes, White Wolf 

You watched the Quinjet touch down, wrapping the rain jacket tightly around you. It was down pouring in Upstate New York. This was the type of weather where you wished you were curled up in your room, under blankets and hot chocolate. But you were waiting for members of the team to come home from a mission. Bruce, Sam, Bucky, and Steve were returning home from clearing out an old HYDRA base, a simple mission. But Bucy stumbled upon mission reports of him as the Winter Soldier and it triggered a depressive episode. Sam sent you a text on their way home. Bruce was the first out of the Quinjet. He descended the ramp and jogged over the covering where you were standing to avoid the rain. You smiled at him. “How’s the team doing, doctor? Any injuries?” He shook his head, spraying water on you. 

“Cap dislocated his shoulder but nothing major besides,” he waved his hand. You nodded, he was talking about Bucky. 

“Headed to the lab?”

“Yeah after a shower.” 

“I’ll see you down there.” He placed a gentle hand on your shoulder. 

“Take your time, kid.” He went into the compound. Next to descend the ramp was Captain America. He was stretching his shoulder as he didn’t seem to be bothered by the rain. 

“How’s the shoulder, Captain?” He shrugged. “I’ve had worse,” You laughed, shaking your head. 

“Natasha is waiting for you. FRIDAY alerted her that you were hurt.” Steve groaned and followed the same path as Bruce. You waited for the next member to come out but no one did. You groaned, ran through the rain, and up the ramp into the Quinjet. You loved the sound of rain hitting metal. On any other day you would enjoy the sound but as you walked through the Quinjet to find Bucky and Sam, a cloud covered your mind. It stopped you in your tracks. Darkness, regret, and sadness crept through you. You felt cold. You shook off the feeling and continued. You found Bucky, sitting on the ground, Sam kneeling in front of him with his hands on Bucky’s knees. The cute interaction made you smile. Sam looked away from his boyfriend and smiled. 

“Hey, El.” You waved. “He’s barely said a word and hasn’t moved.” You nodded, walking over to them. You placed a hand on Sam’s shoulder. 

“I got him.” Sam nodded, standing up. He pulled you into a quick hug. 

“Thank you.” His words vibrated through his chest. You scrunted your nose, pushing him away. 

“You stink.” Sam laughed, shaking his head. 

“Yeah, yeah.” He bumped your shoulder against yours as he left you and the super soldier alone. His head was down, staring at his hands. You sighed and sat next to him. 

“If you could be an animal, any animal in the world, what would you be?” You asked. He didn’t respond, he made no sign that he heard you. “I think I’d be a butterfly. Across different cultures, the butterfly has become a metaphor for transformation and hope. It starts with a colorless caterpillar and turns into an exquisite winged beautiful creature.” You explained. He leaned his head back and was looking forward. Progress. “White Wolf.” You whispered. “A wolf symbolizes loyalty, protection, and freedom.” He let out a shaky breath and his blue eyes were glossy with tears. “In many Native American cultures, wolves are scared creatures. They are strong and courageous.” You looked at the soldier. “I think the Wakandans picked a perfect name for you, Bucky. You are a wolf.” He shook his head. “Why not?” You asked. 

“I hurt and killed so many people.” His voice was shaky as tears fell from his eyes. “I’m not a protector but a monster.” Your heart broke at the way he was talking about himself. 

“The Winter Soldier did those things. The White Wolf didn’t.” He formed his vibranium hand into a fist, opening and closing it. “Better days are near. Hope is so much stronger than fear. You’ve had enough just don’t give up. You are worth fighting for. We all have battle scars.” You stood up, taking your rain jacket off, and held out your hand. “Do you trust me?” You asked. He looked up at you. 

“Of course.” He said. 

“Then trust me when I say I trust you with my life Bucky Barnes and I know everyone behind those walls,” You pointed in the direction of the compound. “Do as well.” He hesitantly put his flesh hand up to grab yours but you pulled your hand back. Confusion flashed across his face. “Other hand.” You told him. He sighed but grabbed your hand with his vibranium one. The temperature difference shocked you. You pulled him to his feet and dragged him out of the Quinjet, down the ramp, and into the rain. 

“What are we doing?” He asked. 

“Teach me how to dance.” You said, grabbing his flesh hand. His eyes grew wide. 

“What?” He questioned. 

“You heard me, old man. Teach me how to dance.” 

“In the rain?” You nodded. “Right now?” You nodded again, excitedly. “Why?” He asked. 

“Because it’s fun.” You said simply. He gave you a pointed look. You shrugged, rolling your eyes. “Have you seen Shawkshank Redemption?” You asked. Bucky shook his head. “Remind me to have a long talk with Sam on what movies he’s showing you.” He smiled. “Towards the end of the movie, one of the characters stands in the pouring rain with his hands stretched out.” You demonstrated the iconic scene with your hands outstretched to the sky. You grabbed his hands again. “Rain is a symbol of rebirth, the flow of life, and cleansing.” You squeezed his hands. “Your memories of the Winter Soldier won’t go away overnight and that quilt, anger, and sadness you carry may never leave you.” You told him honestly. “But you will learn to cope with it. Some days will be better than others. Let today be a reminder for you that you are still alive and so many people care about you. You are not alone.” Your smile grew. “So cleanse away those thoughts and dance with me.” Bucky chuckled, shaking his head. 

“Alright, let’s see those moves.” The darkness was still looming over Bucky but just as a rainstorm, the clouds passed and the sun began to shine again. 

*

Maria Hill; Deputy Director of SHIELD

You regretted saying yes to Wanda. She had a date with Vision and she asked you to finish her mission report and hand it in to Maria. Bucky and Sam invited you and Yelena to play Guitar Hero but you had to decline because it was impossible for you to say no to the Sokovian. You groaned, putting your hand up to knock on the Deputy Director’s door but stopped. Intense feelings of guilt, stress, and dread washed over you. You shook off the feeling and knocked on the door. It took a minute but you heard Maria call out, “Come in.” You opened the door and stepped into her off. Ah. It was Maris you were feeling. Her desk was covered with files. She had another desk with a 3 screen computer system and you could make out emails that needed to be answered. A bottle of whiskey was on her desk, unopened but you could bet she was itching to open it. 

“What can I do for you?” She asked. Her question broke you out of your trance. 

“Mine and Wanda’s mission report.” You said, holding up the folder. You watched Maria suppress a sigh. Over the years you’ve learned to never ask if someone was okay if you could feel their emotions - they would deny something was wrong. You walked over to her desk and handed it over to her. She reached out for it with a tired smile. 

“Thank you.” She went to grab it but you pulled it away. 

“Are you hungry? Because I haven’t eaten all day and I could eat.” It was a small lie but Maria didn’t need to know that. She shook her head. 

“I’m not hungry.” Well that was a lie. “Besides, I have too much to do.” You handed her the folder but once again as soon as she was  going to take it you pulled it away. Her glare would send any agent or Avenger running but you smiled. “I’m about to kick your ass.” 

“I know.” You jumped on the empty space on her desk to sit down. “I’m thinking Chinese or maybe Italian. No Indian. Ugh Mexican.” You were swinging your feet, careful not to damage her desk. “What are you thinking?” 

“If I give you an answer will you leave and give me your mission report?” You nodded. Maria sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Fine Indian.” You smiled, jumped off her desk, and handed her the file. 

“I’ll be back.”

“Can’t wait.” Maria deadpanned. You rolled your eyes at her dry humor. An hour later you found yourself back at Maria’s door. This time you entered without knocking. Nothing in her office changed besides the bottle of whiskey was now open. “Food delivery.” You said, kicking the door closed. You sat on the empty space on the ground with your back resting on the wall. You began to lay out the food, glancing at Maria. “Are you going to join me?” You asked. 

“Why do I have a feeling you won’t let me say no?” You smirked. 

“Because you know me very well.” Maria rolled her eyes, standing from her desk and walking over to you. She made sure to grab the whiskey. She sat in front of you and chose her food. You ate in a comfortable silence until Maria broke it. She took a hefty swig of the whiskey. 

“I know what you are doing.” You hummed, unable to say anything with a mouth full of food. “You can sense I’m feeling a certain type of way and you think it’s your job to help.” You whipped your mouth with a napkin. “I’m fine.” Debatable. But you kept that comment yourself. 

“I’m not doing anything.” Which was true. “My mom told me that working on an empty stomach leads to mistakes and mistakes will make work take longer.” “It’s hard to take advice from a woman that disowned their own kid because they wanted to do good.” You were shocked at Maria’s bluntness regarding your family. She winced. “Sorry that came out wrong.” 

“No, I mean you aren’t wrong.” You sighed. “My relationship with my biological family ended poorly but I found a new one because of it. You, Nick, and all the other crazy characters that live here are my family.” Maria nodded. She was looking down at her food, stirring it. She appeared to be lost in thought and her emotions were muddy, you couldn’t pinpoint what she was feeling. You wondered if her feelings had to do with the idea of family. There were rumors that the Deputy Director had family issues of her own and her agent assumed that was why she’s so unpleasant. You bite the inside of your cheek. “Are you up for a little adventure with me?” You asked. She looked up at you. 

“Oh what the hell. You’ve already made me behind.” You smiled, cleaning up the food. The first step was the fridge then you lead Maria out of the compound to a remote area of the property. You were close to the treeline but had a lot of empty space to move around in. It was twilight - the sun was beginning to set and the stars were coming out. The air seemed fresser here. “Why did you bring me out here?” She asked. 

“To scream.” 

“Excuse me?” She questioned. You nodded, jumping on the balls of your feet. 

“One of the best things about nature is it’s the world’s best secret keeper. You can tell it anything and it will hold it forever.” You explained. You had good memories of yelling your secrets with your brother at your vacation home in Maine. “Even if you don’t say words and just scream or yell or laugh or cry. The trees, the stars, and the moon will listen.” Maria looked confused. “Allow me.” You looked up to the sky and screamed. You looked back at the SHIELD agent and she was shocked by the sound. But you felt freer, the weight that you felt on your chest was a little bit lighter. This time you yelled looking at the ground. “Try it.” 

“You are insane.”

“Probably but have I ever steered any of you in the wrong direction before?” Maria sighed and shook her head. You waved your wan, telling her it was her turn. She closed her eyes, looked up at the sky, and screamed. You cheered and clapped your hands. She yelled again. On her third scream, you joined her. “How do you feel?” You asked. Her cheeks were flushed and her chest was rising and falling, a little faster than normal. 

“Better. A lot better.” You smiled. 

“Tell nature everything. Tell it all of your secrets.” With a deep breath in and out you yelled, “I wish I was good enough for my parents. I wish I didn’t miss them and I hate that I still love them.” Her face softened as if a part of her understood everything you confessed. “Your secrets are safe with me and nature. Scouts honor.” Maria chuckled, pending down to pick up a rock. She threw it in the air and caught it a few times before tossing it into the woods. 

Placing her hands on her hips, she yelled, “Sometimes I wish I declined the promotion of Deputy Director.” You kept your face neutral at Maria’s confession. “I lose sleep at night when I send the Avengers and my agents on a mission because I worry they won’t come home.” Your heart broke. “I have to pick and choose who we help and it kills me that we can’t help everyone.” You smiled at her. “I want people to see me. Not an agent or Deputy Director, just Maria.” She yelled one more time and fell to her knees. “I wish I could be good enough for my dad.” She whispered. You sat on the grass in front of her. The only noise between you two was Maria’s labored breathing as she tried to get her heart rate under control. 

“I’m proud of you.” You said. Her head snapped up to look at you. “I know I’m not the person you want to hear it from but it doesn't make it any less true. You have an incredibly difficult job and many agents and Avengers give you shit for doing your job. I also bet dealing with Fury isn’t a walk in the park either.” Maria let out a wet chuckle, whipping away a few tears that fell. “But never doubt we don’t have faith in you.” She let out a shaky breath. “We’ve all got battle scars. You’ve had enough, just don’t give up and stick to your guns. Keep marching on.” You took Maria’s hand in yours, squeezing it. Her emotions weren’t as cloudy. 

“Thank you for this.” She said softly. She let go of one of your hands to cover her mouth as she yawned. 

“Come on, Deputy Director, you need sleep.” You stood up, pulling her to her feet. “And before you argue with me if you go get some sleep I will help you tackle that mess of an office.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

“No I don’t,” you said. “But I want to help if you want me too.” You gave her the option to not feel as if you were pressuring her. 

“I’d love your help.” You began your walk back to the compound. She put her arm around your shoulders. “They are missing out.” She said, “You are one hell of a superhero.” You smiled, looking at the ground. “I’m proud of you too.”

*

Natasha Romanoff; Black Widow 

You hated being cold. It was winter in Upstate New York and you were not having a good time. Yes, it was pretty and snow meant Christmas but you had half the mind to march to Tony and ask him why he didn’t build the Avenger’s compound in Florida. You were bundled up in a fluffy blanket with hot chocolate in your hands near the fireplace. You were reading when you heard footsteps headed your direction. Grief and sadness as the Black Widow sat next to you. You put your book down and opened your arms. Natasha didn’t even hesitate to move to sit between your legs and you wrapped the blanket around her. The redhead slumped against you, allowing you to hold her weight. You and the Black Widow had a complicated relationship. She hated that you always knew her true feelings and it took years for her to realize you weren’t going to use it against her. It wasn’t until after your fight with Ultron, Natasha started to trust and open up to you. She was the only person in the compound to come to you when her feelings got out of control. It was comforting to know she trusted you on such an intimate level and you weren’t going to break it. You rested your head on her shoulder. “Do you want to talk about it?” You asked. She didn’t answer verbally but you felt her shake your head. “Okay, we can just sit here until you are ready.” The Black Widow just returned from a mission with Steve, Wanda, and Vision. They were in Russia for 3 days. You knew she was going to struggle being there. You sighed. She was warm and you were jealous. 

“You are always so cold.” She mumbled. You rolled her eyes. 

“Trust me I’m aware.” The redhead chuckled. “But at least I have a best friend as a heater.” You gave her a squeeze. You got the opposite reaction you thought you were going to get. Natasha tensed up in your arms instead of relaxing more. “Tash, talk to me.” You whispered. 

“Can we go to your room?” She asked, her voice was shaking. You nodded. 

“Of course.” The Black Widow was comfortable showing emotion in front of you, Steve, and Yelena but not the whole team. You lead the redhead to your room. You held open the door and as soon as Natasha walked in, she climbed into your bed. You closed the door, joining her, and she moved to lay her head on your chest. As routine, you began to run your fingers through her hair. You felt her tears on your shirt but you didn’t call attention to it. You let her cry. You weren’t sure how long you laid there but Natasha sat up and leaned against the wall. 

“I hate Russian missions.” she said, rubbing her eyes. You sat up and handed her tissues that you kept on your nightstand. She took them with a smile. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” She shrugged, looking up at your ceiling. 

“The mission went well. We got in and out without any problems.” She closed her eyes. “We were leaving and I saw these kids playing soccer in the street. Just kicking a ball with no care in the world and I was looking at these kids and I saw myself and Yelena.” She shook her head. “I don’t know we didn’t have that. I mean we did but it was for a mission it wasn’t real.”

“Natalia.” You said. She winched at the name. It was an argument that happened a lot when Natasha first told you about the Red Room mission in Ohio. You determined early on that Natasha told herself that her ‘family’ wasn’t real to help with her guilt and to make it hurt less that they gave her away. The Russian sighed. 

“Yes, yes, I know the mission gave me a real family.” You smiled. “I got angry watching these kids because what they had was stripped away from me.” You nodded. A normal childhood. A childhood that wasn’t about training or ballet lessons. 

“What else happened?” You asked, it wasn’t the whole story. 

“One of the kids got hurt. She had to be 6 maybe 7 and an older kid ran over to her. It was nothing major, just a scraped knee.” She looked back at you and you watched tears start to leave her green eyes. You had a pretty good idea why seeing this was affecting her but you learned it was best for people to say it out loud if possible. “She was only 6 too.” Yelena. You were feeling guilt and grief pulsing through the Black Widow. “And I just left her. I didn’t go back for her.” You knew Yelena and Natasha had come to an understanding of what happened all those years ago but it didn’t make the pain and the guilt any easier. “I let her get controlled.” You shook her head. 

“That wasn’t you Natasha. You had no idea what was going to happen to Yelena.” 

“I should have gone back for her.” You shrugged. “Maybe you should have or maybe Dreykov would have gotten you under his control too.” You grabbed her hand, running your thumb over the back of her hand. “The world is filled with ‘What ifs’ and we’ll drive ourselves mad thinking about what could have been.” You knew from first hand experience. Many nights you lie awake wondering what your life would be like if you said no to Tony. What if you didn’t join the Avengers? “We can’t join the past but we can live for the future.” 

“Would you change the past?” She asked. You thought for a moment, looking at your connected hands. 

“No, I love the life I’m living.” You squeezed her hand. “Definitely how I thought my life would be but I can’t complain.” She nodded her head slowly. “You’re not alone anymore, Nat. Neither is Yelena. Some days that guilt will eat you up inside but better days are near. Just don’t give up.” Natasha squeezed your hand back. 

“I’m glad life brought us together.” She confessed. “You have done a lot for me, for all of us.” You felt your cheeks burn at her honestly. 

“Just doing my job.” Natasha rolled her eyes and pushed you gently on the shoulder. 

“Your job isn’t to be our therapist but we approached it.” You shrugged. 

“Miss. Romanoff, Miss. Belova is looking for you.” The AI said. You looked at Natasha. 

“Movie marathon?” You suggested. “We said we’d try to watch all the Harry Potter movies in one sitting.” 

“FRIDAY, tell Yelena where I am and bring snacks and drinks.” You laughed as Natasha got comfortable in your bed. You grabbed the remote and queued up the first movie. Life hasn’t been the kindest but you wouldn’t change it 

*

El; Empath 

“Has anyone seen El?” Maria asked, walking into the common area holding a folder in her hands. Natasha laid on the couch, her head in Steve’s lap and her feet in Yelena’s, who was playing Mario Kart against Bucky and Sam. 

“FRIDAY said they were going to shower and be right out.” Sam said, without looking away from the screen. Natasha looked at Maria and saw the worry on her face. The Black Widow sat up, earning a curse from her sister. 

“What’s wrong, Maria?” She handed Natasha the folder. 

“That is T’Challa’s report on their mission.” Maria watched Natasha open the report and the color drained from her face. 

“Nat,” Steve said, placing a hand on her shoulder. “What happened?” Bucky paused the game. Natasha cleared her throat. 

“We arrived at the abandoned warehouse at 0700. Upon searching the area we found no signs of anyone being there for some time. Our last area to search were two large shipping containers.” Natasha sighed. “As we got closer, we noticed the smell. El opened the first container. Inside were the bodies of 15 children, ranging from 5 to 16. There were no survivors.” Natasha closed the file. A heavy silence filled the common area. 

“How do we help them?” Yelena asked, breaking the silence. “They are always there for us, how do we be there for them?” 

“I have an idea,” Maria said. “But I’m going to need help.” 

*

You didn’t expect a knock on your door and you were tempted to ignore it. But another round of knocking forced you to leave your cocoon of blankets and walked to the door. A wave of emotions rushed through you; anxiety, hopefulness, excitement, and joy. It was a weird mix and you had to compose yourself before opening the door. It was Maria. Today was full of surprises. “I haven’t finished my mission report.” Truth be told, you haven’t even started the report. The idea of having to relive the past 48 hours made your stomach turn. “I’ll have it on your desk by tomorrow morning.”

“I’m not looking for your report.” Oh. Before you could question why the Deputy Director was at your door she continued, “I read T’Challa’s.” Oh. You didn’t know the King of Wakanda needed to write mission reports. 

“Oh.” You said, looking down at your feet. “I uh well you know how things went down then.” You felt tears in the corner of your eyes. A headache was forming and your chest hurt as you held back the tears. Maria held out her hand. 

“Do you want to go on an adventure with me?” She asked. It was a strange deja vu moment. How many times have you stood in front of the team with your hand out hoping they took it? You wanted to crawl back into bed and ignore the world but you took her hand. You barely got the chance to close your door before Maria dragged you to the elevator. She pressed the button and waited for the metal door. 

“Where are we going?” You asked. She gave you a smile. 

“The roof.” She said as the doors opened. The roof of the compound was your favorite place. It allowed you a place to sit in silence; to feel the wind, listen to the trees, and look at the stars on a clearless night. The roof also allowed you to get away from everyone when you needed a break from their emotions. The elevator opened and you stepped onto the roof. The normal bare roof was transformed. A protector was set up, playing the intro to Hercules. It was one of your comfort movies. In front of the projector - were an assortment of pillows and blankets. Yelena was sitting on some of the pillows with a bowl of popcorn trying to throw pieces into Sam’s mouth while Bucky watched. Natasha and Steve were pouring chips into bowls. 

“What is this?” You asked. Your voice caused your teammates to look at you. 

“This,” Sam answered. “Is our version of the talk you give us.” You looked at him confused. Maria led you to the pillow fort and you sat down. Steve and Natasha joined you. 

“You are always there for us no matter what we are feeling without us needing to ask.” Maria explained. 

“This is us doing it for you.” Bucky shrugged. “Words aren’t our strength but Maria thought a movie might help.” The SHIELD agent blushed at being called out that this was her idea.

“We can watch it with you or if you prefer to watch it by yourself, that’s okay too.” Steve said. It was weird, you were feeling no overpowering emotions from them just you own. You were overwhelmed.  

“Uh, stay please.” You cleared your throat. “Please stay.” Yelena smiled. 

“We got you, dorogoy.” You found yourself resting your head on Maria’s lap with Yelena laying next to you as Natasha started the movie. 

“Do you think Thor has met Hercules?” Natasha asked as the muses began to tell the story. 

“He’s met Zeus, so probably.” You said, taking a handful of popcorn. 

“Sh,” Sam said, throwing a piece of candy at you. You gasped, taking the candy and unwrapping it. You eat it. “Stop talking.” 

“Can we sing?” Yelena asked, glancing at him. He thought about it. 

“I will allow singing.” Yelena gave you a high five. You were feeling better surrounded by people that loved you. 

*

As the credits began to roll, the reality of the situation you experienced crashed down on you. You turned your head into Maria’s lap and bit back a sob. Her hands immediately wento your back, soothing your cries. “We weren’t fast enough,” Your words were muffled but you knew you had their attention as the movie was muted. “Everytime I close my eyes I see that shipping container. Gods, I wish we were faster.” You cried. How many families had to be notified? Families were broken. Sons and daughters were lost. Siblings were never coming home. “They were right.” You said. The words of your parents echoed in your mind. Failure. Worthless. 

“Who are you talking about, malen’kiy slon (little elephant)?” Natasha asked. 

“My parents.” You felt Maria tense up. “They didn’t just not want me to become an Avenger but they said I wasn’t good enough to become one. They said I’d fail.” 

“No,” Natasha said. You heard movement and soon you felt warm hands on your arms and pulled you into a seated position. “I won’t sit here and let you think bad about yourself. They were wrong.” 

“Nat.” You said, slowly. 

“She’s right.” You looked at Bucky. “What happened in Uganda wasn’t your fault.” You looked down, feeling shame creep around you. Maybe if one of them took the mission the outcome would have been different. You weren’t an Avenger. You weren’t a hero. 

“Why do you like the stars so much?” Sam asked. The question caused your spiraling thoughts to stop. You didn’t look up. 

“I like them because of the stories they tell.” Steve answered. “History is persevered in the night sky.” You smiled, looking up. 

“I think they are pretty to look at.” Yelena added. “It’s amazing to think we live underneath such a work of art.” Your smile crew. It was an interesting feeling being on the other side of your silly little question game. 

“I like them.” You began. “Because they are a reminder that we aren’t alone. While you are looking at the stars someone else could be looking at them too.” You let out a shaky breath. “And..hundreds of years ago someone was standing in your exact spot, looking at the same stars.” 

“Exactly,” Maria said softly. “We’ll carry you home. You’re not alone. Keep marching on.” 

“This is worth fighting for.” Sam said. Natasha gave your arms a gentle squeeze. You looked at the red head. 

“You know we’ve all got battle scars.”

“You’ve had enough. Just don’t give up.” Steve said. 

“You are worth fighting for.” Yelena smiled. “Just keep marching on.” You nodded, whipping away your tears. You laughed. 

“I thought you said you guys were bad with words.” You joked. 

“We learned from the best.” Maria smiled. 

“Thank you,” You said. “Thank you for this. Can we watch another movie?” You asked. 

“Anything you need.” 

“Ooo I get to pick.” Yelena jumped up and picked The Incredibles. She laid back next to you, grabbing your hand. 

“Great choice.” Bucky said. You couldn’t tell if he was being sarcastic or not. You didn’t care as you leaned back in Maria’s arms. The Avengers were fighters, soldiers, and righteous. They were once lost, broken, and defeated. But they all had battle scars. As the movie began you were grateful to call them family and home.            

_ 

I’m not the type of person to ask for help but I feel a little helpless. Hurricane Ian devested my home town (I don’t live in Florida anymore) but I lived where the path of the hurricane directly hit for 13 years. That being said my grandfather lives down there and his house was damaged. My grandfather hasn’t had the easiest few years. His wife (my grandmother) passed away 2 years ago during COVID, he’s recently been put on oxygen, and he’s a lone done there. My parents are working on getting down there but the city is a mess and he’s without power and electricity. 

I’ve added my kofi donation page to this story. All donations no matter how big or small will go directly to helping my grandfather get back on his feet and help get my parents down there. They will be missing work by going down there so it will help with bills. 

I appreciate all the support and love you all have given me. If you happen to donate I’d love to write you a personal story for a fandom of your choice. Any amount will help. 

Much love. -Arlana