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psychologeek · 11 months

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Child psychology in a superheros world (AKA Lian Harper ft. ✨Trauma✨)

Some thoughts about chapter 6 of "Core Skills" (probably could make sense without reading the fic, but WHY not reading it??)

I'm pretty sure it got over the heads, but I actually have some solid reasons for Lian's behaviour in this chapter.

Like, Jason is scared here:

"Um, it's - Lian is five, and-" He tries to explain the situation, but can't find the right words to explain. (She can't go alone- Lian's separation anxiety- his fear of losing her, missing again- the restroom issues -)

Bc he thinks about how small she is, and how many times she got kidnapped and hurt, and scared. (I intentionally refer to some of the psychological damage she experience. This is important for me, to show:

ACTIONS has CONSEQUENCES.

You don't always see the damage. Just bc someone look "fine" to you, doesn't mean they don't go through something (even more right with kids, where depression and trauma can look as anger).

It doesn't have to stop. Lian still go out, still play with others, still a child. But part of it is her family adapt to her needs - you see how Jason is in physical contact with her almost all the time. They prepare. They do their best to protect her (armoured backpack, getting cover training, etc.).

And Jazz see it and just goes "oh yes, it's because (a very normal thing).

(Bc sometimes it's like this. You make so many plan Bs, and the first just... Works. No problems. No need to explain.)

about the play:

Lian still looks worried, but she takes Jazz's hand with confidence .

"Jay, you stay here!" She commands. "I have a mission, I need to help Jazz. You stay here and be good. And we go and be safe and when we go back I tell you a story. Ok? You can be a good boy for me and Jazzie?"

"Sir, yes sir," he salutes her. "Good luck on your mission, be safe, and don't get separated."

"I'm not 'Sir', I'm hero!" She laughs and starts leading Jazz to the nearby building. "Here, it's gonna be okay. You don't need to worry, I've got you."

I really liked writing it, bc - well, another "child psychology" thing.

Here we see Lian deal with a very scary situation for her. She has to go to another place with a practical stranger, but more importantly - without her "safe person" (Jason). It's really really scary.

Then Jason mentioned that as a mission, and she can reframe it -

She's not Lian, a scared kid. She's a hero (like, her dad, Jay, and Kori). Heroes can do EVERYTHING.

I also imagine what she tell Jay

"I have a mission... You stay here and be good. And we go and be safe and when we go back I tell you a story. ..."

Come from what Roy tell her when he has to go on a mission.

Like, I see him tack her to bed and try to get her to feel safe or stop cry, so he tell her "I'm going, but I'll be back and then we'll read a book. Can you pick a good book for me?". Which is actually a good method of helping kids (and adults) in stressful situation - having a mission help regain control, or feel that you have control about what happens. Which is very important in order to avoid ✨PTSD✨

And now, in this situation -

Now SHE is the hero, and she use the words and framing she KNOWS to make sense of things.

So she comfort those left behind.

And this:

She laughs and starts leading Jazz to the nearby building. "Here, it's gonna be okay. You don't need to worry, I've got you."

I imagine it came from either things her dad told her, or watching a mission/civilian evacuation on TV. You can see the tone difference - it's clearly more mature than the rest of her speach, and what a five year old would say.

And I just.

I love it. Her. And slightly sad

#lian harper #batman #jason todd #red hood #danny phantom #jazz fenton #core skills #core skills au #psychology #child psychology #trauma #childhood trauma #the psychological effects of being a superhero's kid #attachment disorder #anxiety #meta #fic analayzis #my writing

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seidigardensystem · 3 months

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Silence is Not Your Enemy

Dear Therapists,

I know now that most of your clients show up and talk almost nonstop for the fifty minutes they spend with you each week. They engage with you. They talk to you. They actually respond to your CBT strategies and the two of you are able to dance the steps needed to change thinking and behaviors. It is your normal and their normal, however it is anything but my normal.

I started graduate school and the first set of counseling tapes we had to watch were the Gloria tapes. We observed Carl Rogers and Albert Ellis conducting sessions with the client called Gloria. She chattered away the entire time with these two men. It totally flabbergasted us, and when we saw you next we told you how the school showed us some fake counseling tapes because no one talks that much in their sessions.

Oh how you laughed.

Us non-talkers really provide a challenge for you. It is a challenge and you have to step outside of the box and outside of your comfort zone. It is easy to personalize our behavior and think that somehow you are doing something wrong. It might touch your ego and wounds in such a way that you feel the need to defend yourself or even blame us for our inability to talk. We are resistant. We are not ready. We are avoidant. We are attention-seeking. We are difficult.

Please, we need you to rise to the challenge. Working with trauma means working with dissociation. Working with trauma and dissociation means working with attachment wounds. We are not just anxious and we are not just avoidant. We are disorganized in our attachment style because part of us had to be attached to our caregiver to survive and could not know about the abuse that the other part of us had to endure. Not all parts live in the present and we replay this out with you.

We push and we pull. We need you and then we hate you. We love you and push all the boundaries by texting and emailing and demanding additional sessions and then we sit here in complete silence as you try not to pull your hair out. You offer us a coloring page and markers, which we take. We spend our fifty minutes in complete silence, coloring a picture of a bird with your colorful sharpie permanent markers. Markers. We were never allowed to have markers as a kid. (To be fair, we once took a black permanent sharpie to the kitchen chairs, table, countertops, and drew a line on the wall all the way down the hall to our bedroom and drew a line on every fancy dress we owned from the waist to the hem.)

The forbidden item in our hands told us that you trusted us not to make a mess. You trusted us to keep the markers on the paper. You even colored with us on our own page. We would pick a color out, hand it to you and point to which part of the picture we wanted you to color and you obliged. Coloring was not your thing. Trying to be creative stressed you out a bit, but you did it with us anyway.

When the fifty minutes was up, you remarked what an expensive coloring session we had. You were convinced we had wasted a session. You thought nothing happened in that little hour and you were down on yourself for not being helpful. You were convinced that talking had to occur in order for the session to be productive. They call it talk therapy for a reason, I suppose. Except, the session was productive. The session was helpful. The session was healing in ways you could not see, because as you like to point out, you have yet to develop the ability to read my mind.

Many of the most helpful therapies, for us at least, are the ones that do not involve talking. Silence can be very powerful and it is not your enemy. There is so much work happening in our brains that you cannot see and your talking CBT interventions won’t be able to touch. It doesn’t mean you are doing anything wrong. Don’t get trapped in your own mind, but stay present with us. Being present with us is the most essential tool you need.

You were present with us for fifty minutes. You were attuned to us for fifty minutes. You were calm. You were engaged without pressuring us to talk before we could. You allowed us to process. You were nonjudgmental and we felt no shame. You made the session about us and not about an agenda. We hope you are able to see how much healing occurs in a small session just like that.

Sincerely,

Your client

#did #dissociative identity disorder #trauma therapy #mental health #healing from trauma #ptsd recovery #ptsd #trauma healing #trauma #talk therapy #trauma therapist #cognitive behavioral therapy #cognitive processing therapy #attachment disorder #cptsd #trauma survivor #psychotherapy

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sp00kysk3lly · 11 months

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Sometimes I wish I could save you And there's so many things that I want you to know I won't give up till it's over If it takes you forever, I want you to know.

When I hear your voice It's drowning in a whisper It''s just skin and bones There's nothing left to take And no matter what I do, I can't make you feel better.

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manie-sans-delire-x · 1 year

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Feel angry and want to scream and throw things and beat my limbs against the ground in a toddler-like tantrum. Its not fucking fair that someone hurt me as an actual toddler or some shit so now I will never be able to attach to anyone and will never know love or happiness. Like wtf is that shit are you fucking kidding me

#attachment disorder #attachment issues #op

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braindiarrhea · 2 years

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I am using limerence/daydreaming as a way to cope with an insecure sense of self and as a way to make parasocial relationships which are safe because I am lonely and not trusting of other people not to reject me. I have a low view of myself and other people. Fearful-avoidant attachment style. I also have a high view of myself in a way. Maybe like a mild form of narcissism. Reckless independence used as a coping mechanism for deep insecurity and negative self image. I learned as a child, based on my relationships with caregivers, that doing things myself is practical and in fact necessary. However I tend to have a blindness to the fact that my own thoughts and decisions are faulty or not optimal. Again a coping mechanism to deal with the fact that being alone all the time is actually detrimental, not preferable…

#psychology #maladaptive daydreaming #limerence #attachment disorder

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cheslintt · 11 months

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Self-discovery isn't always a solitary journey

When it comes to relationships and friendships, I have always had difficulty connecting on an intimate level and I realize now that I suffer from an attachment disorder. I often found myself pushing people away and keeping people at a distance, no matter how much I longed for connection. I understand now that this has been a way of protecting myself, as I had a deep fear of getting hurt. It took…

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#accept #attachment disorder #fearful-avoidant attachent #insecure attachment #talk

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letyourfatedecide · 2 years

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Loosing touch with reality.

#attachment disorder #unhealthy attachments #bpd favorite person #bpd mood #bpd vent #living with bpd #bpd feels #bpd blog #quiet bpd #bpd splitting #bpd meme #borderline personality problems #quiet borderline #borderline personality disorder #borderline things #borderline personality traits #i’m needy #actually obsessive #obsessive tendencies

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into-wonderland-caroline · 2 years

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Trying to be alright getting home from the ride with mom to drop dad at the airport

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glitterkitty2-0 · 1 year

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I'm actually not grateful that I'm able to feel emotions. I want to be fucking numb again.

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3-in-haelfte · 2 years

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When we are crumbling under the sheets catching our breathes, I want you to know how happy I am inside. That my empty eyes come from too much trouble and not lack of feeling. I wish you knew how much I wished I didn't feel this much. I wish you knew you feel like coming home and how it overwhelms me that your arms don't turn into architecture anymore. Like they used to. Do you just want to keep me? Like a token? Your favourite little play thing? I wish you knew every time you kiss me in public I feel ashamed of myself. I wish you knew that I feel like I'm losing you and it's all my fault. Maybe I'm the one who wants to keep you like a token. The only person that ever fought against my demons long enough to understand it is an endless pit filled to the brim with them. The token that for some, I was worth it. The token that if I'm willing to fight my own demons I can also be loved. But never feel it. I don't want to make you cry, but we are not meant for each other. I don't want to cry, but I'm not meant for you. And I have no idea if this is me or my demons. Like a trapped animal I scratch my way out from your belly. I wanted you to swallow me whole in one gulp, I brought this upon myself. And I know tomorrow, when I see you, all I will want to do is to kiss you. But my decision remains the same: I just want to be friends.

#diary #personal diary #non binary writer #writersociety #creative writing #dear diary #my diary #new artist #love #chaotic mind #attachment styles #attachment disorder

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sunset-peril · 2 years

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Ashes Remain (A Man Named Terran #2) - Chapter One - Trial Interrupted

December 16, 2027

10:00am

District Courtroom Number Four

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"Hey, Hey!" A man in a bulletproof police uniform rushed the stand. "There's a live bomb! The bomb's been reactivated!"

Pandemonium flooded the courtroom as the gallery fled the courtroom.

"Apollo!" The red-vested lawyer's young co-worker pulled his arm. Her eyes darted around in terror, and her personal AI glitched around her neck. "Come on, Apollo!"

"No! I can't let it end like this!"

"Stay with me, Apollo!" Her brute strength overcame his reluctance, and they began to move.

He heard a scream, and yanked away from her. "Keep going! I'm right behind you!"

That was the last thing Athena remembered before pain blazed through the sides of her head, then stabbed the back, and her vision went black.

~~~~

December 16th, 2027

11:00am

Central Japanifornia High School English Department.

~~~~

It was family week at CJHS. Normally, such celebrations were reserved for the lower level schools, but the week-long celebration of family relationships was part of a greater study on the effects family had on the societal state of the youth.

Big words aside, it was a study to see if certain types of mental and physical states were directly connected to the presence, or lack of presence, of the student's family.

Trucy Wright had narrowly escaped being auto-sorted into the 'suspected personality issues' group. The study had already suggested imbalances with orphans, especially when the individual aged out of the foster system. She already knew this because her brother, or she called him her brother, Apollo Justice, was called on to be tested for the Aged-Out group. His special someone (as her best friend Pearl always designated), Athena Cykes, was also an orphan. She was pulled for two different groups. One was orphans who moved in with relatives instead of being surrendered to the foster system. Athena wouldn't talk about the other. At least not around her. Daddy knew, and she guessed Apollo knew too, but Athena kept very tight lips.

This made sense, as Athena was legally insane. She knew she'd be a bad mark for orphans. She was sweet as Pearl's rice cakes from her hometown of Kurain Village, but that designation would follow her the rest of her life.

Apollo wasn't the greatest advocate for orphans in the study either. Her brother in spirit had severe attachment issues. He was cynical, sarcastic and experienced episodes of heightened anxiety whenever suddenly separated from one of the three of them. He reacted the most when separated from Athena, which made her dad, the legendary Phoenix Wright, designate them as an official legal team so the court would automatically assign them both to every case they worked on. Justice n' Cykes, the Wright Anything Agency's shining stars in the darkness of the law.

No one explained exactly to Trucy what the Dark Age was, just that it caused her to lose her real daddy, Apollo, to become naturally distrustful, and traumatized Athena to the point she eventually moved in with Apollo to find respite from her nightmares.

At least, it was all like that until recently.

Apollo's friend died suddenly yesterday morning.

He didn't come home to Athena last night. Daddy was on the phone with her all night, trying to soothe her fears.

They started fighting at work. Athena hadn't come home the night before, and he demanded to know where she'd been after the initial investigation. She couldn't answer.

Daddy removed her from the room.

Being taken away while her brother and the woman she'd been certain he loved fought was frightening. Was this the Dark Age? Of course they had to have their huge fight the day of Family Intros. How was she supposed to introduce her family? She had her daddy, her brother, and her brother's girlfriend, but her brother suddenly started yelling and throwing things at his girlfriend, who happened to be insane?

She thought everything was going to be better now. Apollo was always happier with Athena, and Athena with him. The only thing she was lacking was a mom, which her and Pearl were working on behind the scenes. She didn't want to see Justice n' Cykes fight, it worried her.

At least her and Pearl were alright. Pearl had basically been raised by her dad and Pearl's cousin Mystic Maya (who was Trucy and Pearl's choice for a new mother) after her mother was convicted of murder, and would have been in the same group as Athena if she'd been just a few months older. She'd been telling Pearl about everything: Apollo's friend suddenly dying, him and Athena fighting. Pearl was glad to note they seemed a little more normal this morning when she left for school: Apollo kissed her head and bopped her hat and Athena was happily blabbering on about this and that before giving Trucy a bottle of orange juice, lemon bars for the whole class she'd baked to keep her mind off things, and a prop she'd polished for the day's presentation; though a bit removed from Apollo.

They both seemed removed from each other, but considering Apollo didn't go home last night, she supposed that wasn't too odd. It was definitely awkward for her when they arrived at different times.

Phoenix had texted her about 8:45 to tell her the pair had finally started talking to each other, but captioned it with the fact he'd rather have been with his daughter at school; it was awkward at the office.

She decided to ignore yesterday's events when she was called up, and had the happiest picture of the Agency she could find to show her class. "This is my family. Officially, it's only me and my daddy, Phoenix Wright. But the man in the red on the left is basically my brother, Apollo Justice. Daddy had asked Apollo if he wanted to officially be adopted, but he didn't want to. Polly's a lawyer, and wanted to reserve the court's time for adopting little kids and not his twenty-three year old self. But he did accept being considered part of the family. The lady on the right is his girlfriend, Athena Cykes. She's a doctor of psychology, and Apollo's legal partner. She's an orphan like Polly, but they seem to have a pretty good idea of family when they're together. She made the food I brought for the snack bar, and is only two years older than I am! I really look up to her when I need to know what a strong woman is. She can throw Apollo! That's actually how they met, she accidentally threw a full-grown cop onto him!"

The class erupted into laughter, and so did Trucy. Remembering the happier times helped her worry less about the current situation. At least until the phone rang.

"Of course, yes, I'll send her right away." Her teacher looked in her direction. "Trucy, you've been called to the front office. Checked out."

"Oh, okay! Thank you." Trucy handed the pointer back to her teacher and gathered her things.

"Tell Athena the lemon bars are really good!" Pearl muttered with mouth full. "I bet that'll make her happy!"

"That will make her day, Pearlie. I'll see ya later."

She carried her backpack out to the main office, where Prosecutor Gavin and Detective Skye sat uncomfortably on the carpeted chairs, muttering amongst themselves. It was Gavin's silence that struck her the most. Ema was like Apollo, with that no nonsense personality. Gavin though, was like Athena on a sugar rush. She expected the former rockstar to be flirting with the detective, strumming on a guitar the tune of 'Guilty Love' or 'The Guitar's Serenade.' He remained silent and subdued. "Ah, Fraulein Wright. Good."

"Prosecutor Gavin? Are you and Detective Skye here for me?"

"Yes, Trucy. Your father's gone on ahead, and requested us to pick you up." Ema held open the door and Klavier escorted Trucy out.

"Gone on ahead? Prosecutor Gavin, what happened to Daddy?"

"Nothing happened to Herr Wright... it was Herr Forehead and Sunshine."

They climbed into Ema's compact little car, sitting in excruciating silence. "What...? What happened?"

Ema bit her lip and crammed a fistful of Snackoos into her mouth, Klavier took a few too and munched nervously.

If it had something to do with Athena and Apollo's fight, the whole legal world must know. "What happened to Polly and Thena, Ema?"

She sighed, sliding out a box of tissues from under the dash. "There was a bomb, in the courtroom..." She nodded.

"W-what about the bomb? Polly and Thena are okay, right?"

"Fraulein, your so-called brother and his... special companion were inside the building when the bomb exploded. Their bodies were found in the rubble by the search team. Your father is at the hospital now awaiting their condition. We will meet him there, and hope for the best. From what I heard from the first response team, " His face tightened into that serious gesture that humorously reminded Trucy of an emoticon, though it was anything but humorous now. "we should expect they passed instantly."

They received a text while on their way:

Currently alive, not well. Over 70% of P's burns 3rd degree. Being kept under. T in surgery. Brain hemorrhaging in back brain from impact. Neither guaranteed.

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