#anis gaymer moments
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Does anyone else think about how Shinji said this twice...
The first time was somewhat innocent, because he didnt believe in the idea of fate. He refused the idea outright because it was just too bleak. He wanted to think that there was a way for everyone to live, so why believe in something like destiny or predetermination?
And yet... He likely said this out loud to comfort Tezuka, to motivate him, to keep him from giving into despair. Shinji does not believe in fate, but the person he is dragging out of the battle field does, and he wants Tezuka to borrow his own feelings of determination and passion for just a moment, so they can both live to see the next day.
But what Shinji doesnt understand is that Tezuka did this sacrifice precisely because of Shinji's passion. Shinji has nothing to offer to this man because Tezuka has already made the choice to purposely refuse the benefits of Shinji's savior complex. He make his choice the moment that he walked out the door of Atori, and purposely distanced himself so Shinji wouldn't try to die for someone else. Tezuka explains that he changed fate for Shinji to live. Tezuka explains that he took this man's place so that Shinji can fight in this war, so that Shinji can find an end to the violence. Tezuka wants him to continue where he would fail, where he would have blamed himself for the death of another friend and never gotten back up.
Shinji wishes there was another option, that he could have somehow seen this coming and stopped Tezuka and figured out a way to live too... But what can he really do? Tezuka's last words left such an impact on him, and while Shinji originally didn't believe in fate, he could not help but lean into the idea after Tezuka's death. He tends to weigh other people's ideas more than his own in his head, so when Tezuka dies because he followed his principles to the end like this... He just can't deny it as much as before. Denying that fate exists would be spitting on the face of his friend's choice, right?
So the idea sits with him. The idea that fate was already changed... He's not sure if he can believe it, but he can't not believe it, either. There had to have been another way that things have gone, right? That's what he wants to think, but he cannot deny the weight of Tezuka's ultimate choice. He has to learn to accept this, somehow, but it's hard for him, it's hard to remember which thoughts are his own and which thoughts are borrowed from his memories of Tezuka. Shinji slowly becomes burdened by the idea of fate. Believing in Tezuka's last hope is the only way for him to continue, it's the only way for him to cope.
And that's when the narrative throws a fucking curveball. This character, wrattled with grief, finally trying to move on from that horrible moment of senseless violence, is forcibly dragged backwards. Six months. Six entire months happening all over again right before his eyes. Shinji gets an impossible second chance to fix what never should have happened. He knows who is going to die and he has the time to prevent it. He can change it.
But he discovers that he cannot change himself. He watches everything in horror as it happens all over again because he cannot break out of his own skin. He can't change his habits, he can't think different thoughts or change his actions, he can't seem to remember the details of that future that has not happened yet. His future self, and his future grief, is buried deep inside of him. He tries to claw his way out in any way he can, but he is trapped in the prison that is himself. He can only catch the smallest glimpses of clarity through the bars of his cell, and by then it is often too late.
When Shinji finally gets back here, to this moment, he must have repeated these words. He cannot change his thoughts, after all. So he says it and it means the same thing as before; he wants to comfort Tezuka and lend him his own determination and will to live. But there is now an additional meaning to it, isn't there? There is now a layer of despair. A part of Shinji is so, so desperate for things to change. A part of him knows that Tezuka diverted fate for his sake, and isn't that diversion a part of fate now too? Can't we change that too? Do not die when fate tells you to die. Don't do this, don't leave me again.
#i wrote this in some tags a while back but im crazy and needed to elaborate and make my own post so hi whats up im normal about tv#anis gaymer moments#kamen rider#kamen rider ryuki#kamen rider ryuki spoilers#ryuki spoilers#tezushin#long post#<- SORRY JUS TREALIZED HOW LONG THE WALL OF TEXT IS
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Video Game Related Asks for Gaymers!
Platform of choice when gaming?
Top 5 games of all time.
Favorite boss?
Best game soundtrack (full album or single track)?
Most memorable gaming moment?
First game you ever played?
Most recent game you played?
Most anticipated upcoming game?
Most hours you’ve put into a single game?
Game you’ve replayed the most?
Favorite game genre?
Favorite game character?
Coolest enemy/boss design?
Worst game you’ve ever played?
Hardest game you’ve ever played?
Single player, multiplayer, or both?
Do you play mobile games?
A game you started, but never finished.
A game that you wish you could play for the first time again.
A game that made you cry.
A game you thought you wouldn’t like, but ended up loving?
Do you watch any other gamers?
Do you typically choose to play a male or female character (when asked to pick)?
If you could live in one of the games you’ve played, which one would it be?
Favorite environment in a game?
Least favorite environmental hazard (e.g. poison swamp, fire/lava, etc.)
A popular game that you just can’t get into.
Do you still buy physical games?
Favorite childhood game?
Favorite aspect of a game (e.g. exploration, combat, fashion/customization, environments, graphics, bosses, roleplaying, etc.)
If you could only play one game for the rest of your life, what would it be?
Have you ever rage quit a game? If so, what game and what caused the rage quit?
Most embarrassing gaming moment.
Funniest gaming moment.
Do you own any gaming themed memorabilia? (e.g. collector’s editions, posters, prop replicas, statues, clothing, etc.)
Hottest video game character?
Kill, Fuck, Marry (choose three characters)
An unpopular gaming opinion you have.
What’s something you want to see in the future of gaming?
Best game cover art.
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Why so shy? PART 2
(A/N): Hello, gaymers. I'm back at it again. Sorry for the late update, I've been busy malding in VALORANT lately. Thank you for all of the support in part 1, it means the world to me. Now, some of the things here are referenced to that one casual Iso fic. Huge thanks to whoever wrote that, I'm in love with that fic. I physically gagged and cringed at the part where I made the reader channel their idk to do sum shit I can't do this. Enjoy thirsting, gaymers.)
(I also accept requests, please request about Iso)
(Iso x Shy!GN!Reader)
Part 1
Part 2 (You are here.)
Nervous.
That's exactly what you were feeling right now.
Not nervous for yourself, but for Iso.
Today marks the day of Iso's first ever mission in the VP. To your advantage, you were assigned as Iso's lead comms.
You were busying yourself with taking breathing exercises in KJ's command room.
Iso was gonna be hearing your voice, following your orders and intel, counting on you to tell him what to do at the right moment and he's probably gonna fall inlo-
A knock on the metal door of the command room broke your trail of thought. It opened, revealing Iso.
"Hey." Iso walked in with a small smile, nodding to you.
You look up from the mission brief that Brimstone gave you and look at Iso. This time, you actually managed to train yourself to try and not stutter in front of Iso. You're not exactly there yet, but you're trying your best.
"Hi, Iso. Ready for your mission?" You offer him a small smile, feeling a little nervous for him and his safety.
"Yeah. I made sure to read the brief at least five times." Iso nods.
"Better safe that sorry." You smile, typing in the last command needed to start the mission.
"Right, uh... I just wanted to say that I wish you a very good luck on your first mission." You try to smile despite your nervousness.
"Thank you, but... I don't understand why I have to do this mission alone." Iso sighs, shaking his head.
"Brimstone says that he thinks that you're strong enough to handle it yourself, but I think he just doesn't want to admit that everyone is busy with everything else, so they can't go with you." You stifle a laugh.
"But I agree with Brimstone, whether or not he thinks you're strong enough. Your abilities are really powerful and you handle yourself pretty well. I think you got this." You smile at him, trying your best to hide your blush.
"Thanks a lot for your encouragements, it helps a lot." Iso smiles.
"And our training sessions, too. They're really helping me improve." Iso adds.
That alone was enough to make your heart race faster than normal.
"A-Anyway, I'll be the lead, and only, comms for today's mission. If you have any questions, calling for backup, or need help locating the target, I can help." You explain, turning to the table behind you.
You carefully took an earpiece from the table, turning to Iso and offering it to him. He follows your gentleness, taking the earpiece with careful hands.
In the process, his fingers brushed against yours. It was enough to give you butterflies on your stomach.
"This is what we use to communicate to each other from great distances. You can talk to me or hear me through it." You explain, snapping out of your thoughts.
"We have two trackers on you. One on your phone that we requested you to add, and one on your earpiece. Although you can turn off your location trackers, I advise you not to, just in case." You smile at him, hoping he'd understand what you were trying to say.
"I got it. Thanks for explaining it to me." Iso nods, taking off his left earbud and replacing it with the earpiece.
You took note of his actions, observing him closely.
"By the way, if I did ask for backup later on..." Iso paused.
"Yeah?" You tilt your head with a smile.
"Since you said that everyone else is busy, will you come?" Iso asks.
IS HE IMPLYING SOMETHING????????? AM I JUST DELUSIONAL OR WHAT, you thought.
"W-Well, yeah. I'm still responsible for you and your safety, according to Brimstone." You nod, pushing the thoughts to the back of your head.
"I'm glad." Iso nods, smiling.
WHAT DOES THAT MEANNNNNNNNNNNN???, you thought.
"Can I only talk to you about anything related to the mission?" Iso asks.
"Not necessarily, as long as you're not in the middle of a gunfight." You shook you head.
"Great. Uh, one last thing." Iso rubs the back of his head.
"After my mission, do you think we can go out for hotpot? My treat." Iso smiles, looking at you.
WHATWHATWHAT OHMYGOD IS THIS REAL FUCKFUCKFUCK, your thoughts raced.
You had to take a moment to process what Iso just asked you. Was this some kind of prank? Maybe Phoenix told him to prank you? Was this just a friendly gesture-
"You okay? You don't have to say yes, or we can get different food. Anything you like will do." Iso smiles.
"I- No! Hotpot is fine... A-Anyway, yeah, we can go out after your mission as long as you come back unscathed." You nod, your face turning visibly red.
"Then, I'm looking forward to it." Iso smiles.
"A-Anyway... The jet should be ready to transport you to the mission site. You can head to the departure wing now." You look back to the screen.
"I'm going, then. Thanks for your help." Iso nods.
You look back at Iso and smiled.
"Good luck on your mission, Iso." You nod as Iso walked out of the room.
You turn back and sat on the chair, all while letting out a shaky sigh. Was it just a friendly gesture or something more?
Suddenly, your thoughts were interrupted by Iso's voice in your earpiece.
"Hey, can you hear me?" Iso asked through the comms.
You snap back to reality and let out a small huff.
"Yeah, loud and clear." You nod to yourself.
"Right, thanks. I'm in the jet right now, heading to the location." Iso says.
"I got it. I'm writing the report for Brimstone right now." You reply, typing out a document.
After a moment of silence, Iso speaks up.
"Hey, when you first arrived in the VP, how was it?" Iso asks.
"Huh? Well... It wasn't really easy." You say, recalling back to your newbie days in the VP.
"I was kind of an outcast and everyone thought I was creepy and stuff." You shrug, still typing.
"Why's that?" Iso asked.
"Well, just like Omen and Fade, I have abilities related to shadows or darkness." You paused.
"I was really quiet and stuff, so some were afraid to even look my way, because I can just merge myself with their shadow without them knowing." You shrug.
"But hey, I managed. Omen became my very first friend. He understood me." You smile.
"Wow... Omen? That's kind of him." You hear Iso hum.
"How about your first mission? How did it go?" Iso asked.
"Back then, I had little to no control of my abilities. I was merging myself to shadows back and forth because I didn't know how to control it." You laugh.
"But I learned how to control it, thanks to Omen. He knew exactly how I felt and why, and he taught my how to control it, even if he can't control his own." You sigh.
"My first mission went really well because Brimstone paired me up with Omen. He was really helpful, teaching me how to defuse the spike." You explain.
"Anyway... How about you? How are you feeling? This is your first mission, after all." You ask.
"I was kind of hesitant when Brimstone first told me." Iso says.
"But when I found out that you're gonna work closely with me, I feel much better." You could almost hear Iso smiling. Wait, was that even possible?
You could feel your heart beating faster and your face turning red. Surely, he didn't mean it that way. Maybe it was just a friend thing?
"I think I can handle this mission." Iso continues.
You quickly shook off the lingering feeling.
"I'm sure you'll do great." You nod.
"By the way, what kind of milk tea do you like? Sorry, that was a random question." Iso chuckles.
"Me? Well, I like heavy oolong milk tea with tapioca pearls." You paused for a moment.
"Jett and Phoenix often made fun of me for being so basic, but I think it's really good." You smile.
"What about you? What do you like?" You ask.
"I actually like the same thing. I get it all the time." Iso replied.
"Whoa, really?" You smile.
"We have a lot of things in common, hey?" Iso says.
"That makes me really happy." Iso added.
It was starting to get hard trying not to think of this as a gesture of interest and not just for friends.
"Oh, we're landing now." Iso says.
"Be careful, Iso. You'll just need to eliminate the Omega Earth Radiants and defuse the spike if planted." You nod.
"You'll come if I ever need help, right?" Iso asked again.
"Yes, I will. Don't worry." You assure him.
"Okay, I'm heading out now." Iso says.
For the past hour, you've been helping Iso locate the enemies and giving him instructions. You watched his location attentively while writing a report, all while talking to Iso.
"Iso, there's one enemy left. Do you think you can defuse the spike until half?" You ask.
"Yeah, I think so. I'll try." Iso replies.
On the other end, you can hear Iso running to the spike. You heard beeping, which means that he was defusing now.
"Don't let your guard down. Don't rush, there's still plenty of time left." You remind him.
"Almost half, come on..." You hear Iso mutter.
A few seconds later you could hear a Vandal being fired, then Iso grunting.
"Iso?!" You stood up from your seat.
"Spike is half... I got shot on the shoulder..." Iso groans.
In the background, you can hear Iso firing his Sheriff, presumably at the assailant.
"Okay, okay... He's down, I can still defuse with my other hand..." Iso coughs, followed by the beeping sound again.
"Iso, listen to me. Just hold on and keep defusing, okay? I'm coming." You connect the comms to your phone, running out of the room.
"Really? You're coming...?" Iso asks, his voice low and pained.
"Yes, I'm on my way. Just a little longer, okay?" You ran to the departure wing, getting on the jet.
"I'll wait for you." Iso grunts.
"Keep talk to me, Iso. I need you to stay awake." You frantically went through the jet's storage for some medical equipment.
"Put some pressure on the wound to prevent excess bleeding. I'm on my way." You say, your voice shaky.
"Will we still go out for hotpot after this?" Iso asks, his voice low.
"Yes, I promise we will when you get better." You promised.
The jet hovered over the mission location. You shout for the pilot to open the door, as it'd take longer if you waited for the jet to land.
The door opens for you and you look out from it. Your eyes scanned the mission area from above, looking for any kind of shadow you can merge with. Once you do, you stepped back to prepare yourself to jump.
"I see a jet in the sky, is that you?" Iso asked, coughing.
"Yeah, it's me. I'll be with you soon." You breathe out shakily.
"What are you planning to do?" Iso asked.
But before you can answer, you dashed out of the jet. Your eyes locked onto the shadow of the building, preparing to channel your ability. You closed your eyes, letting your shadow take over.
In seconds, your body turned into a shadow-like orb, heading for the shadow of the building. Your body reached it immediately, merging with it. Once you did, you jumped away from it and ran to Iso.
"Iso! Hey, I'm here." You pant heavily, kneeling beside Iso.
"Hey..." Iso grunts, sitting up slowly. Beside Iso was the defused spike.
"Don't move, stay still. I'll do my best to help you, okay?" You mumble shakily.
How will you even do this? You weren't a healer, you weren't even trained for this. You look at Iso's pain expression and you knew you had to do something, anything.
You could make use of your abilities, the shadows. You remember what Omen told you, about how if you channel enough energy to your shadow, you could make it do what you desired. If you could do it, you could use them to absorb the wound, the pain and the bullet and save Iso.
Could that even work? Were you crazy? But you knew you had to try.
"Iso, listen to me." You hold his bloody hand shakily.
"This'll hurt a bit, okay? Do you trust me?" You squeeze his hand gently.
"I trust you." Iso nods.
"Stay with me." You mumble, letting go of his hand.
You place your hand over his wound and your other hand on your shadow. You close your eyes, channeling your shadow to your hand. You press your hand firmly on Iso's shoulder, your shadow entering his open wound, earning a pained hiss from Iso.
You focused your mind into commanding your shadow to absorb whatever it would have to absorb in order to heal Iso. You didn't know what you were doing, you were going crazy.
You let a few minutes pass, with your palm pressed on Iso's wound. You didn't know if what you did worked, but you were growing lightheaded.
pleaseworkpleaseworkpleaseworkpleasework, you chanted in your mind.
Once you feel your shadow disappear from your hand, you opened your eyes, slowly removing your hand from Iso's wound.
It was gone.
The would was no longer there, just the skin of Iso's shoulder through the hole of his hoodie. All that was left was Iso's blood.
"It... It worked..." You let out a shaky sigh, still not believing in what you did.
"What?" You hear Iso ask as he looks at his now-gone wound.
"It's gone? How did you..." Iso looked back at you.
"I don't know, I..." You mumble, looking at your shaking hands.
"No, I... It doesn't matter right now. Let's go back to HQ." You shook your head, shakily standing up.
"Can you stand? Do you need me to support you?" You offer your hand for him to take.
"I think I can." Iso nods, using his other hand to take your hand as you pulled him up.
"How did you do that? You never told me you could do that." Iso asked, looking at you in awe.
"I didn't even know that I could do that." You shook your head.
"Let's go back to the extraction point. I'll definitely need to write a detailed report about this..." You mumble, walking with Iso.
You and Iso walked for a few minutes, before finally arriving to the extraction point. You both got on the jet as it took off.
You plop down on the seat, still feeling a little lightheaded.
"Are you okay?" Iso asked, sitting beside you.
"I should be asking you that. How are you feeling? No more pain?" You sigh.
"I feel fine. It doesn't hurt anymore." Iso shook his head.
"Hey, thank you." Iso says.
It was enough to catch your attention, so you look at him.
"You came to save me, and I'm really thankful for that." Iso smiles.
"We can't have you dying on your first mission, Iso." You smile.
"But you hurried here, you tried your best to use your ability and ended up learning that you can actually heal me." Iso shook his head.
"Can I be honest with you?" You ask.
"I came to you despite knowing that I couldn't help at all." You admit.
"I had no medical experience and I wasn't anywhere near Sage's level." You sigh.
"But I still came to you. It was... an urge." You mumble.
"But now, I'm glad I came, after all. I learned a lot." You smile.
"I'm glad you came." Iso smiles.
-
After that, Iso was sent to the medic wing, where Sage checked Iso's health.
Brimstone informed you of this, so you went to check up on him for your hotpot with him later.
As you were about to slide the door open and walk in, you heard Iso talking with Sage.
"I'm glad you're okay, Iso." Sage says.
"Thanks a lot, Sage." Iso replied.
"Hey, do you think we can go out for milk tea later today?............" That was all you heard before your ears blocked out every other noise.
And here you thought that you were making progress. You really thought that Iso liked you back? Of course it was Sage.
You thought back to his interactions, how he'd look at her, how he'd call her his senior. But you were dumb and ignored all of it.
Now, here you were.
You had hoped for something when he talked to you earlier today, when he asked to go out for hotpot with you and only you.
Maybe it really was just a friendly gesture.
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Whispers In The Dark; Ch. 2
Summary: When a casual one-night stand develops into a deeper, forbidden love, you and Wanda try to keep your relationship a secret as you navigate the challenges of balancing your growing emotions with the fear of being caught.
Pairing: Wanda x Reader
Warnings: 18+ (nsfw), mentions of death
Words: 6,174
✎ | ❁
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@diaryoflife @women-am-i-right @creatively-analytical @obsessed-with-wandamaximoff @beforeoursecrets @iliketozoneout @olsensnpm @hoefnagel521 @chasingmaximoff
└─────────────ᗢ─────────────┘ ┌─────────────∞─────────────┐
@myfavoriteficss @pinkytoecrust @cyncity32 @romanoffomixam @peachbear88 @magicallymaximoff @therealmeari @peggycarter-steverogers @ba-romanoff @natashabelovas @morbid-gaymer @reminiscingtonight @when-wolves-howl @idontknownemore @natashasilverfox @sayah13 @fuxk182 @scarletwitchofthewilds @natashamaximoff69 @wuwu96 @jsonebraincell @whendarknessturns @marvel4liferz @red1culous
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“Yes, sir.” You seemed to have stopped listening for a while now. You weren’t sure what he had said. The words had jumbled in your mind, making it difficult to comprehend the meaning behind them. You wondered if you had even articulated your response clearly, or if it had come out as unintelligible gibberish. It was as if the random noise in the back of your throat had escaped, mimicking speech without conveying any coherent message.
On the desk in front of you, Alexander Pierce’s face appeared on the computer screen. As your boss and the higher authority within the organization, his presence demanded attention and respect. Yet… you were struggling to do just that. For what was probably the gazillionth time in the span of twenty minutes, your eyes slowly shifted away from the virtual meeting to land on the folder resting amidst the scattered papers that littered the desk’s surface. Wanda Maximoff’s name was emblazoned in bold, black ink on the tab, enticing your curiosity. It seemed that the comprehensive dossier on her had arrived just before this unexpected meeting commenced. You hadn’t had a chance to explore its contents, as other pressing matters took precedence.
You had hoped that it would’ve faded into the recesses of your mind, much like the other neglected folders resting amidst the sea of unpacked boxes in your apartment. Yet, its persistent presence refused to be ignored, exerting what felt like a gravitational pull on your thoughts, compelling you to explore its hidden contents.
The allure of the folder became too enticing to resist any longer. With a mix of curiosity and trepidation, you reached out… but the moment your fingers grazed it, you were snapped back to attention by the mere sound of her name rolling off of Alexander Pierce’s tongue. “It has come to my attention that you sent Wanda Maximoff on a highly sensitive operation this morning.”
“Yes, sir.” The fog that had clouded your thoughts began to dissipate, replaced by a renewed sense of alertness. You recalled the mission you had assigned her earlier, a covert operation of significant importance. “The assignment involved retrieving Loki Laufeyson, Thor’s brother,” you explained, making sure your words were clear and coherent this time. “Agent Maximoff’s unique abilities made her a valuable asset for the task. As far as I’m concerned, she executed it with precision and achieved the objective successfully. The man in question is sitting in one of our… rigged capsules.”
Pierce’s scrutinizing gaze remained fixed on you, his expression unreadable. “I hope you understand the gravity of the situation, Director,” he stated sternly. “Not only are Maximoff’s powers still relatively unknown and untested, but she also has a past that makes it difficult to trust her. We cannot afford any mishaps or breaches in security.”
You maintained a composed demeanor, acknowledging the seriousness of Pierce’s concerns. “I understand the gravity of the situation, sir,” you assured in a steady voice. “While Agent Maximoff’s powers may be unfamiliar to us, she has demonstrated her loyalty and commitment to the mission. Her past may raise questions, but she has been thoroughly vetted and deemed fit for the task.”
Pierce’s expression remained wary, but a hint of curiosity flickered in his eyes. “Vetting can only provide limited assurances,” he cautioned. “We must tread carefully when dealing with individuals of such complex backgrounds. Their loyalties can… shift unpredictably.” His eyes were guarded behind a steely look as his words hung in the air, underscoring the delicate nature of the situation and the potential risks involved.
You met his gaze head-on, unyielding in your resolve as a determined spark ignited within you. “I’m well aware of the risks, sir,” you responded firmly, your tone brimming with conviction. “Agent Maximoff’s past may be complicated, but her actions thus far have shown dedication and commitment. She successfully apprehended Loki under the radar. I entrusted her with a mission, and she exceeded all expectations.” Leaning forward, you rested your elbows against the top of the desk, emphasizing your earnestness. “I understand the need for caution, sir, but how can we expect someone to earn trust if they’re never given the opportunity?”
You could’ve sworn you caught Pierce’s expression softening, but he was quick to catch it, steeling himself once more. “You have an optimistic view of her,” he remarked, though his wariness remained visible in his tone. “Just ensure that your optimism doesn’t blind you to potential threats. Keep a close eye on her, Director.”
“I will exercise vigilance, sir,” you assured him. “The safety and integrity of this organization are my utmost priorities. We will monitor her closely and act accordingly should any concerns arise.” As you spoke, your attention was momentarily captured by the sound of your office door swinging open and then closing. Your heart quickened its pace when you watched Wanda confidently stride into the room, maintaining eye contact over the top of the laptop while sitting against the arm of the couch, a subtle smirk tugging at the corner of her mouth. The intense energy between you was palpable, and you couldn’t help but feel a surge of anticipation.
Pierce’s voice brought you back to the present, jolting you out of the spell Wanda’s presence had cast. “Very well, Director,” he acknowledged, his tone authoritative. “I trust your ability to handle this matter with the necessary caution. Keep me informed of any significant developments.”
You nodded in response, slightly struggling to keep your voice steady and determined, “Yes, sir.”
With those parting words, the screen flickered and Pierce’s presence dissipated, ultimately allowing you to turn your gaze back to Wanda, who was still resting against the couch, a small, enigmatic smile playing on her lips. You closed the laptop slowly, deliberately, allowing yourself a moment to collect your thoughts. The room seemed to buzz with an electric charge, and the intensity of the connection between you and Wanda lingered in the air.
No matter how hard you tried, no matter how much you knew you had to… you couldn’t deny the magnetic pull between the two of you.
“I wasn’t aware I had an open-door policy, Miss Maximoff,” you remarked. As you casually adjusted your position, leaning back in your chair, your arm subtly slid across the desk with your movement, purposefully disrupting the already-scattered pile of papers to conceal the folder containing her dossier.
She chuckled softly, lowly, yet you heard it all too well. “Well, Director, I couldn’t resist the temptation to see you in action,” she replied, her voice carrying a teasing undertone.
A playful spark seemed to ignite within you, and you found yourself leaning forward just as she was slowly moving to stand. “Is that so?” you retorted, a glimmer of excitement unwillingly dancing in your eyes. “Perhaps I should enforce stricter rules then.”
Wanda’s smirk grew more pronounced, and she began closing the distance between you with calculated steps. “Or maybe,” she offered, her voice low and suggestive, “we can find another way to bend them just a little.”
Your eyes darted to the laptop, remnants of the video call with Alexander Pierce slipping into your mind. The weight of your responsibilities bore down on you, reminding you of the delicate balance you had to maintain within the organization. The lines between professional conduct and personal inclinations blurred in the presence of Wanda Maximoff.
The air crackled with suspense as she rounded the desk, pushing against the top of your chair until you were fully facing her. Once again, the weight of responsibility is completely forgotten. Your jaw dropped open, a word on the tip of your tongue, yet no sounds could be heard when Wanda gently lowered herself onto you, straddling your lap as her fingers gripped the back of your neck. Your movements were automatic, your hands resting on her hips as you seemed to have trouble looking away from her emerald irises.
“Wanda…” You were trying to say her name with authority, trying to warn her that she shouldn’t be doing this, but your body sold you out. Instead, you said her name wanton, as if you were begging for more because, fight as hard as you can, Y/N, you did want more.
And her low, breathy chuckle told you she knew that, too. “I told you,” she whispered, bending slightly so her lips brushed your ear. “I was more than willing to wait to finish thoroughly.” She took your earlobe in between her teeth just as she drove her hips against you, pulling a gasp from your throat while your stomach twisted like a coil.
Your grip on her waist tightened with need, and you gave in to the feeling pushing against you. With one quick maneuver, your lips were pressed into hers, swallowing her moans as your hands guided her rutting. Your insides throbbed with desire, your fingers danced up her shirt as she took over her own motions, and the way she moaned your name into your ear had you gasping. You turned in the chair, Wanda bracing herself against the desk behind her, and the movement seemed to brush some of the scattered papers off of your desk and to the floor.
“Touch me, Y/N,” she whispered, panted, begged. It sent shivers up your spine.
You obliged, allowing the tips of your fingers to ride the supple surface of her abdomen until they reached the hem of her bra. The skin under the garment was warm, and she was groaning the moment your touch skirted over the area she desired to be touched the most. Her chin tilted back as you leaned forward, exposing her neck to give you more access as your lips brushed across it like a feather.
“Wanda, I’m…” Your words trailed off as a sudden clap of thunder reverberated through the air, jolting you back to reality. The sound seemed to echo in your ears, its intensity leaving you slightly unnerved, yet Wanda appeared unfazed by the disturbance. The moment you pulled back, she pushed forward, pressing her lips to the soft skin just underneath your jaw. It was like flipping a switch, plunging back into the captivating allure of Wanda’s touches and the sensations they bring. However, reality wasn’t going to let go of you that easily, reclaiming its hold as a series of sharp and loud knocks resounded throughout the room.
Unlike earlier, Wanda wasn’t as willing to part ways this time. She released a deep, irritated breath as she swiftly climbed off your lap mere moments before the door opened. A woman popped her head into the room, her eyes bouncing back and forth between you and Wanda for a moment before finally settling on you. She looked familiar, her name making an uncomfortable itch appear in the back of your mind as she fully entered the room.
“Ma’am,” her voice broke through the hazy enchantment, serving as a reminder of the woman’s identity. You recalled her from earlier in the day, realizing that she had requested your signature for… something, yet her name seemed to elude your memory. “There’s an urgent matter that requires your immediate attention.”
You pressed your lips together, scratching the back of your neck before you moved to stand up. Now that Wanda’s body wasn’t pumping adrenaline through you, exhaustion seems to be sneaking up on you pretty quickly. It was evident in your eyes, but your movements didn’t lack confidence as you followed the woman (whose name you can’t remember for some awful reason).
As she guided you down the corridors of the compound, the clamor of raised voices grew louder. Surely this was the urgent matter the woman had mentioned.
Rounding the corner, a scene unfolded before you - a swarm of SHIELD agents surrounding a central figure, their attention fixated on the source of the commotion. It was none other than Thor Odinson, radiating an unmistakable aura of anger and frustration at the heart of the gathering.
“I demand for my brother to be released at once!” he commanded, his furrowed brows displaying deep frustration and determination. His body turned, eyes searching the growing crowd, seeking an authoritative figure. “Loki belongs in the prisons of Asgard, not held captive in some mere human penitentiary! Show me to him!”
“That’s not happening,” you declared, the sea of agents parting at the sound of your voice. It was instant that Thor’s piercing blue eyes snapped onto you, eyeing the way you stood as tall as you could with your hands gripping your hips, projecting an air of superiority. “Your brother stands accused of grave crimes against humanity. He is required by law to face consequences, whether or not he is a god or the adopted brother of one.”
“And he shall see to those consequences on Asgard.”
“He didn’t seem to last very long in your prison,” you countered, your arms firmly crossing over your chest as you held your ground. The tension in the hall thickened as your words hung in the air “Considering he’s here and not there, did he get early release for good behavior?” Thor’s eyes narrowed, his gaze intensifying, while faint chuckles floated from the onlookers. Your focus remained on his intimidating presence. The soft laughter ceased just as quickly as it came to be, swallowed by the weight of the situation when he took a small yet heavy step forward, his expression becoming sterner.
“Where’s Fury?” Thor’s voice was laced with a mix of suspicion and urgency. The mention of the former director’s absence seemed to ignite a spark of concern within him.
You cleared your throat, your tone unwavering as you met Thor’s fiery gaze. “He’s no longer with us. Unfortunately for you, Mr. Odinson, that puts me in charge.” Authority floated around you as you stepped forward with confidence despite the anger displayed on his face. “Loki stays here.”
The area grew quiet, the anticipation hanging thick in the air. All eyes were fixed upon the clash of wills between you and Thor, the atmosphere crackled with tension as the two of you stood locked in a silent battle of determination. The fate of Loki hung in the balance, and it was clear that both of you were determined to defend your respective positions.
“Loki is my brother. My responsibility,” Thor announced, his voice growing deeper and more forceful. “I’m not leaving until he is at my side, and anyone who stands in my way will face their own consequences.” The agents in the room exchanged uneasy glances, recognizing the potential for conflict that loomed before them. Some even slowly moved their hands to rest on their sidearms, and you could feel your stomach twisting tautly with nerves. Hopefully, it doesn’t come down to that.
You took a deep breath, steeling yourself against the mounting pressure. It was clear that Thor’s determination had escalated, and finding a peaceful resolution would be an uphill battle. But you couldn’t allow the situation to escalate into violence or compromise the safety of those nearby. “I understand the bond you share with Loki, Mr. Odinson,” you finally said, your tone steady despite the growing tension, “but we cannot allow personal attachments to undermine our duty and the security of innocent lives. We must consider the results of releasing Loki into an environment where he has proven to be a threat.”
Your decision was met with an intense gaze, his grip on Mjolnir tightening, sparks of electricity crackling around him. The crowd held its breath, awaiting his next move.
“Stand aside,” Thor growled, his voice filled with anger and resolve, “or face the full fury of a god.”
Your heart raced rapidly, beating against your chest as he seemed to stand taller before you, but you stood your ground, refusing to be intimidated. “Violence is not the answer.” You lifted a hand in an attempt to calm him down as you added, “We must find a way to resolve this without causing harm to anyone.”
The air seemed to tremble with the unspoken clash between the two of you. The agents watched on, their loyalty divided between their duty and the power emanating from Thor. At that moment, you realized that finding a compromise would be even more challenging than anticipated. The fate of Loki, the security of the organization, and the potential for a confrontation hung in the balance, awaiting a resolution that could satisfy both duty and familial bonds.
Heavy silence suffocated you as Thor’s gaze bore through you, his muscles tensed and ready for action. It wasn’t a debate anymore, it was a standoff. A battle of wills that threatened to tip over into chaos. The weight of the decision rested upon your shoulders, and the outcome would shape the course of events to come.
It was a moment of unexpected intervention. As Thor attempted to wield his hammer, a surge of red energy surrounded his wrist, hindering his progress. His mighty strength rendered ineffective against the force, causing his brows to knit together with rage, his pupils narrowing even further to mere crumbs. His gaze shifted behind you, and you turned to witness Wanda, her eyes ablaze with a fiery crimson hue, exerting her own power to counter Thor’s aggression. You found your stomach uncoiling when she met your stare with a soft, easy smile.
Hushed whispers filled the air as the two powerful beings struggled against each other, the agents watching in awe and apprehension, unsure of how this unexpected turn of events would unfold.
“Release me!” Thor’s voice boomed, his demand filled with indignation and defiance.
You felt a renewed sense of empowerment surge within you, a willful smirk curling your lips. The tables had turned, and you held the upper hand for now. With a determined gaze, you stood your ground, undeterred by Thor’s wrath. “Not until you calm down,” you declared, voice steady and commanding. It was a bold move, challenging the god of thunder himself, but you were resolute in your stance. The safety of everyone involved and the preservation of order was paramount.
Thor’s expression shifted from anger to incredulity, his eyebrows furrowing deeper as he grappled with the unexpected resistance he faced. The room crackled with charged energy, the clash between power and authority hanging in the balance. “I’m calm,” he finally said.
Wanda’s crimson eyes locked with yours once more, a silent understanding passing between you. She released her hold on him, and Thor straightened his form as his eyes danced back to you. He stared at you for a moment, feeling as if he were sizing you up, or as if he were forming another plan in that brain of his to get his brother back. Either way, you didn’t back down.
“Very well,” he conceded, his voice tinged with disappointment. “But know this, Director, I will be watching closely.” He turned on his heels, the crowd of agents instantly parting to give way as he marched away. The presence of the Asgardian gradually faded, his departure leaving behind a lingering sense of tension in the room.
You nodded, clapping your hands together while you announced, “Back to work, everybody.” As the agents returned to their normal rhythm, dispersing to resume their duties, the weight of the confrontation slowly lifted from your shoulders. You turned to fully face Wanda, but your gaze slowly drifted to Coulson lingering behind her in time to catch his small nod before he left.
“That was very impressive,” Wanda mused, struggling to hide the mischievous smirk that played upon her lips. With each sly step she took towards you, your heart quickened its pace, climbing up to your throat, unable to escape the intensity of the moment. The darkening depths of her eyes added an electrifying allure, casting a spell upon your senses. “It takes a special kind of courage to challenge a god, especially one consumed by anger.”
The surge of pride coursed through your veins, straightening your posture and bolstering your confidence. With a casual shrug, you maintained an air of nonchalance, even as you found yourself drawn closer to her magnetic presence. “I wouldn’t be a very good director if I cowered away at mere inconveniences, Miss Maximoff.”
She responded with a whimsical hum, her playful head tilt accompanied by the tantalizing sight of her teeth capturing her bottom lip. Her eyes glistened with desire, casting a bewitching spell that ensnared your senses. Lost in the haze of her allure, your arm instinctively reached out, compelled to gently sweep away the stray strands of hair that adorned her cheek. For a fleeting moment, you forgot your surroundings - that you weren’t in the solitude of your office, nor the seclusion of her apartment - until an abrupt chirp shattered the illusion. Your phone, a stark reminder of reality, jolted you back to your senses. Like a switch being flipped, full control over yourself snapped back, causing your breath to hitch in your throat as you hastily stepped away from her. The passionate darkness in her emerald irises wavered, replaced by a tinge of disappointment as you cleared your throat, forcing yourself to avert your gaze and reach for your phone.
The spell was broken, and the weight of your responsibilities crashed back down upon you when you read your boss’s name on the screen, serving as a harsh reminder of the boundaries that needed to be maintained. The boundaries you are constantly neglecting.
“Excuse me, Miss Maximoff, but duty calls,” you uttered, your voice betraying a hint of reluctance. As you lifted your eyes to meet hers once more, a strange sensation washed over you, causing your legs to momentarily falter. Lost within the depths of her captivating gaze, you found yourself trapped in a trance unlike any before. The usual desires, seductive playfulness, and mischievous glints were replaced with something different - something softer, more powerless.
In that brief instance, vulnerability danced in the depths of her eyes, as if revealing a hidden side that had previously remained concealed. It tugged at your heartstrings, stirring a mix of emotions within you. The allure remained, but it was laced with a yearning for connection and understanding. It was a vulnerable invitation, silently pleading for you to acknowledge the unspoken depths of her being.
However, duty compelled you to tear yourself away from the enchanting pull. With a resolute sigh, you mustered the strength to regain control over your legs, willing them to move forward. Yet, the memory of that moment lingered in the recesses of your mind, leaving an indelible mark upon you.
You could feel her eyes on the back of your head as you walked away.
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“Come in,” you announced automatically, barely lifting your gaze from the papers scattered across your desk. The routine had become second nature to you: someone knocked, you acknowledged their presence, signed whatever document they presented, and swiftly dismissed them. Your hand instinctively reached out to receive the clipboard, expecting the familiar weight of papers to land in your palm. But the footsteps approaching your desk seemed unusually slow, causing a flicker of curiosity to interrupt your monotonous rhythm.
Lifting your head, you found yourself locking eyes with Coulson. To your surprise, his hands were empty, folded neatly across his chest as he fixed an expectant gaze upon you. The absence of paperwork left you momentarily puzzled, prompting a question to escape your lips.
“Am I missing something here?” He maintained his composed stance, the air in the room growing heavy with unspoken revelations, and the gravity of the moment enveloped you. “Out with it, Coulson,” you pressed.
“Mr. Pierce is waiting for you in the conference room.” He met your gaze steadily, clearing his throat as he patiently waited for your mind to process his words.
Confusion furrowed your brows for a brief moment before surprise widened your eyes as you frantically sifted through the papers on your desk, searching for your phone. Desperation laced your voice as you hastily denied the imminent arrival. “No, he’s not due until tomorrow,” you protested, a touch of desperation seeping into your words. “It’s-”
“Ten in the morning.” Coulson interrupted your frantic search, his head tilting to the side as he observed your panicked movements. The unspoken thoughts that passed between you were evident in his expression. No, you hadn’t gone home. No, you hadn’t slept. Yes, you were doing all this paperwork Pierce sent over last night. Yes, your mind had been consumed with thoughts of Wanda Maximoff. The weight of your responsibilities and the unanticipated turn of events collided, leaving you reeling with a mix of exhaustion, longing, and apprehension.
In the corner of your eye, a glimmer caught your attention, obscured beneath the papers on your desk. Relief washed over you as you successfully fished your phone out of the chaotic pile. However, any fleeting sense of triumph swiftly dissipated when you glanced at the screen. Coulson’s words echoed in your mind, confirming Pierce’s untimely arrival and a wave of anxiety surged through you. The details of this meeting eluded you as if shrouded by a foggy haze.
Without a second though, you sprang to your feet with such haste that your chair careened into the wall behind you. The loud thud punctuated the urgency of the situation, emphasizing the disarray that mirrored your racing thoughts. Time seemed to accelerate as you quickly gathered your composure, determined to face the impending meeting, even if you couldn’t recall its purpose.
You exited the room, the door slowly sliding shut behind you, leaving your deputy director alone. However, it didn’t take long for a realization to dawn upon you, prompting a swift about-face. Sheepishly, you poked your head back into the office, a contrite smile adorning your face. “Where’s the conference room?” His finger pointed in the direction you needed to go, and with a nod of gratitude, you swiftly disappeared once more, determined to find your way to the meeting.
Upon reaching the conference room door, the sound of laughter emanating from within caused your muscles to tense up. One laugh was unmistakably Pierce’s, characterized by its gruffness and rigidity. However, the other laughter resonated deep within you, igniting a warmth in your gut that was undeniable. The mere sound of her laugh had the power to captivate you, making you hesitate to open the door and disrupt the harmonious melody unfolding on the other side. But you quickly snapped out of your daze, remembering that Wanda Maximoff should not be engaged in friendly conversation with your boss.
With resolve, you entered the room and confirmed your instincts. Wanda was indeed immersed in a cheerful conversation with Alexander Pierce, both of them sporting smiles. You forced one of your own, but as soon as you met those sparkling green eyes, your grin became authentic. “What’s going on in here?” you inquired, closing the distance to the occupied table.
“There you are, Director. Please, take a seat and join us,” Pierce greeted with unexpected cheerfulness, a major difference from the stern man you’d spoken to through the computer not that long ago. He gestured toward the seat next to Wanda, and you reluctantly settled into the chair while attempting to maintain a noticeable distance from the woman. “Where have you been hiding this one from us?” He looked toward Wanda, whose face had grown brighter when she saw you. “She’s an absolute delight! And she’s already ours for the taking.” Soft laughter lingered in his voice, leaving you intrigued about their earlier conversation.
The sight of Pierce’s ease and comfort with Wanda - as if they were old friends - immediately after issuing a strict order for you to monitor her due to a lack of trust in the new Avenger sent waves of unease rippling through you. It was disconcerting to witness such a stark contrast in his behavior, as if the order had been mere words with no real significance. Your mind raced with questions, trying to comprehend the motives behind his contradictory actions. Did he genuinely trust Wanda more than he let on? Or was there a hidden agenda at play? Doubt gnawed at you.
Wanda chimed in playfully, answering on your behalf while keeping her eyes trained on you, “Oh, Y/N just loves keeping me for herself.” However, as she spoke, Pierce’s demeanor shifted abruptly, returning to his usual strict professionalism. He studied Wanda intently, causing her to divert her gaze from you to meet his scrutinizing one. A knot of anticipation formed in your stomach as you watched him silently analyze her.
He cleared his throat, shaking his head for a moment before turning to you. “I’m impressed by how you handled the Loki situation,” he confessed. A glimmer of pride shone in his eyes, contrasting with his rugged expression. “It was your first assignment, a significant one at that, not to mention. To be honest, I wasn’t sure you had what it took, but I’m not one to shy away from admitting I was wrong.”
Leaning forward, Wanda placed a gentle hand on your shoulder and spoke, her voice filled with admiration, “It’s only been a day, but I think Y/N’s been doing a wonderful job so far.” This time, your smile remained forced as you subtly shifted your shoulder, discreetly removing her hand from your touch under Pierce’s watchful eyes.
“I can handle anything thrown at me, sir,” you commented in an attempt to divert his attention.
He cleared his throat, his eyes dancing back and forth between you and Wanda for a quiet, tense moment before asking, “Do you let all your agents call you by your first name?”
“No, sir-”
“I don’t see how that’s really relevant here,” she interrupted, not mincing her words. You swallowed the thick saliva that had formed in your throat, the knot in your gut beginning to grow tighter. “I believe that she-”
“Agent Maximoff,” you interjected swiftly, your voice firm, trying to regain control of the situation. You avoided meeting her eyes as they flickered toward you. “That’ll be all for now.” The room fell into an uncomfortable silence, with Wanda watching you, Pierce observing her, and you staring at the table, desperate to dodge all eyes.
“Yes, Director.” You winced subtly at the tone of her voice, ultimately telling you that she was not pleased with your dismissal. Surely she wasn’t one to hold a grudge over something so minute… right?
Pierce adjusted his suit jacket as she made her way out of the room, leaving the two of you alone. The sound of the door closing resonated in the quiet before his voice finally cut through it, “I’m not questioning your ability to do this job, Director.”
“Hasn’t even crossed my mind, sir,” you assured.
“I mean, you’re the first female lead since the fifties. I have the right to be cautious.” His smile appeared forced, lacking the sincerity it held when you first entered the room. The tension returned, and he seemed to fully revert to his usual self. “I came here to ask about your plans with Loki.”
“We have him contained in a specially designed confinement capsule aboard the Helicarrier,” you began, your voice steady and composed. “The cell is equipped with a failsafe. Any attempts to escape or breach the containment will trigger a rapid descent mechanism, dropping whoever is in the cell a significant distance.” You glanced at Pierce, ensuring that he was following your explanation. His eyes narrowed slightly, indicating his focus on the matter at hand. “I made it clear to Loki about the consequences of any efforts of escape,” you continued. “The knowledge of imminent death should serve as a deterrent and discourage any further disruptions or attempts to regain his freedom. My plan for Loki is to keep him imprisoned to prevent any further damage to Earth.”
Pierce nodded, slow and precise movements, but you sensed by the way he leaned back that he was ready to voice his concerns. “You want to keep him locked up for the rest of time?” He scoffed, a humorless laugh crawling out of his throat as he shook his head. “Loki has caused substantial damage to New York, costing us billions of dollars.”
“He has also taken just as many innocent lives,” you quickly claimed. “It’s not about the money, sir. People-”
“That’s beside the point,” he interrupted. “Keeping him locked up isn’t enough.”
Your eyebrows knitted together deeply as you eyed him, trying to get a good read on his face, but he was a closed book with no chance of getting it to open. “I’m sorry, sir, but I’m not sure I understand what you’re implying.”
Pierce’s gaze solidified, his tone growing more serious. “What I’m implying, Director, is that simply containing Loki isn’t a long-term solution. We need to consider more permanent measures to ensure he can never pose a threat again.”
A flicker of concern crossed your face as you contemplated the weight of his words. “Are you suggesting…?”
He leaned forward, his voice lowered. “I’m suggesting we explore options for a more definitive resolution,” he explained.
Your breath caught in the back of your throat, the earnestness of his proposition sinking in. “You’re talking about… terminating Loki?”
His expression remained impassive, but there was an underlying intensity in his eyes. “I didn’t propose such an extreme measure, Director.” He shrugged loosely, a sly smirk playing at the corner of his lips. “Loki is a prideful god. He views humans as insignificant and feeble creatures. It’s only a matter of time before his arrogance is bound to make him disregard your warnings and… attempt to escape his rigged prison. If he chooses that path, we cannot be held accountable.”
You paused, allowing his words to sink in, fully aware of the subtle subtext beneath his statement. It was a strategic maneuver to absolve himself and the organization of any responsibility. By framing Loki’s demise as a consequence of his own pretentious choices, he aimed to keep your - and his own - hands free from the stain of his blood.
The knot in your stomach - the one you had thought had dispersed at Wanda’s departure - reappeared, only this time it launched itself into your throat. The way his eyes gleamed with a sinister glint made you feel nauseous. “Sir, I understand the severity of Loki’s actions, but we must also remember our duty to uphold the principles of justice and due process. We cannot become judge, jury, and executioner,” you argued.
His gaze bore into yours, his voice unwavering, “We can’t afford to let sentimentality cloud our judgment. Loki has proven time and again that he is a danger to global security. We must be willing to consider all options, even if they are difficult.”
The weight of his words pressed upon you, and you knew you weren’t going to convince him otherwise no matter how hard you fought. Still, you didn’t plan on giving in so easily just yet. “Then we must exhaust all alternatives, explore advanced containment methods, and leverage our resources to ensure the safety of both our agents and the world.”
Pierce’s face hardened, the lines etched deeper into his features. “Director,” he began, folding his hands on top of the table between you and him, “there will come a point where we have exhausted all options. Don’t you think it’d be a waste of time, resources, and money to only end up at the same outcome?” He smiled lightly, a wicked tinge to the expression. “We cannot shy away from that possibility.”
Your eyes locked with his, a silent battle of principles and pragmatism. You had gone head to head with the God of Thunder and won. Yet, here you were, butting heads with a mortal man and on the verge of losing. “I refuse to believe that we must sacrifice our values is the only path to achieving the greater good. It is our duty to explore other solutions, to seek justice and preserve life - all lives. We cannot embrace the mindset that justifies shedding blood. There must always be a line we will not cross.”
His gaze softened ever so slightly, a flicker of begrudging respect crossing his features. “I must admit, Director, your unwavering dedication is commendable.” However, the smile that lingered on his lips revealed his underlying satisfaction. It was evident that you had officially lost this battle, succumbing to his ability to see to it that you would never step foot inside a SHIELD building for the rest of your life. “I expect a comprehensive report in my email by the end of the week.” He swiftly rose from his seat, adjusting his jacket with deliberate movements. “An autopsy report,” he clarified his tone laced with a chilling edge. A twisted smile played on his lips, the sinister glint in his eyes sending a shiver down your spine. It was a reminder of the darkness that lurked beneath his polished exterior.
With that final unsettling gesture, he exited, leaving you alone with the weight of his demands.
#wanda maximoff#scarlet witch#marvel#marvel cinematic universe#mcu#wanda maximoff x reader#wanda x reader#maximoff x reader#scarlet witch x reader#wanda#maximoff#phil coulson#shield#reader insert
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Some Personal Favorite BL Moments of 2023
this is inspired by @lurkingshan's post, thank you for that 😊
Best Show
be my favorite, hands down. this show hooked me right from the very beginning, and each week it kept outdoing itself. the kindest, most compassionate storytelling mixed with some absolutely amazing character journeys and a strong message at its heart, bmf will stay with me forever (and not only because i managed to snatch one of the utterly gorgeous box sets for my collection). 12/10 puffball music boxes
Best Scene
alan and wen pre- and post-breakup at the start of episode 5 of moonlight chicken. i've rewatched these nine minutes more times than i can count. both first and mix do some incredible acting here, and it's such an utter joy to watch. 5/5 crying firsts sliding down a wall
The Scene That Came For My Life The Most
look, i've talked about only friends episode 6 [4/4] before. you all already know that i desire mew carnally for what he did with that audio tape. i have also rewatched this scene an embarrassing amount of times. 96/69 illicit sex tapes
Most Rewatchable Show and Best Main Couple
this one goes to a boss and a babe. i have already rewatched this show twice this year, and i love it more on every single rewatch. i regularly lose my mind about how much i love this silly little show and start waxing poetic about how much this love story means to me, how much i adore gun and cher's weirdness, their communication, their commitment, their gentleness, their mutual respect, the way they help each other and heal each other, the way they make each other feel safe and loved, which my friends from the bl besties server can attest to. maybe one day, i'll put all of my ramblings into a coherent format, but for now please trust that this show is absolutely wonderful and extremely special to me. 1000/10 gaymer friends sleepovers
Best Premise (That Was Utterly Ruined By The Show)
i've got to say dangerous romance, although step by step comes in at a close second. after the second episode of dr, i was out here writing hundreds of words worth of meta, and then... well, then the show became what it unfortunately is, now. i still want to see the show that i was promised (a thriller about two poor brothers who get into hot water because of money issues and end up having to turn to crime to survive, all while the younger brother slowly falls in love with the biggest bully at school, and over the course of the show the bully needs to learn to become a better person and help sailom overcome the trust issues he should have had from growing up constantly threatened and sometimes physically abused by members of the mafia.) -20/10 stupid fucking windmills for ruining something that could have been amazing
Best Side Couple
tiwpor, you will always be famous to me. my school president itself might just have given us crumbs, but i licked those tiny crumbs right off the floor with delight, and when our skyy 2 made it canon, i lost my entire mind. i could not have asked for more. 2/2 couples t-shirts
Best Date
yang and phumjai on their practice date in episode 4 of love in translation was probably the sweetest thing that happened on any bl in 2023. in the later episodes, they had many more beautiful moments together as well as some incredibly amazing physical intimacy (plus, in the extended iqiyi cut, one hell of a foreplay scene), but their sweet date before they had even confessed their feelings has stayed with me. 11/10 slices of pandan
Best Beach Scene(s)
never let me go wins this one. no other show was as devoted to showing off their beautiful beach locations as nlmg this year. watching this show made me yearn for the sea. 1/1 tattoo of your boyfriend's name
Best Rooftop Scene
despite the stiff competition in the form of bmf and cherry magic thailand, last twilight has this one in the bag. the pain, the pining, the heartbreak, the complicated feelings, the desperate kiss... they even lampshaded this trope in the dialogue. stellar scene. 12/10 sunflowers
Best Sensuality
we've had a lot of high heat bls this year, some of them still ongoing, and since billy infamously said "a lot and deeply", i feel like the next episode of the sign might just blow all of our minds. i'm not awarding a best sex scene here so i won't have to eat my words in a few days—however, i feel confident in saying that when it comes to raw sensuality, no one is going to beat ray and sand in only friends this year, no matter how hard the characters on pit babe, playboyy and the sign might be trying. truly, nobody embodies sensual attraction like first and khaotung do. 69/10 sausages that represent blowjobs
Best Minor Character That Stole The Show
gotta agree with the masses here and say nawin laws of attraction. what a guy. every day i miss him. ∞/10 unhinged ex boyfriends
Best Viewing Experience
this is not bl, but it might as well be: midnight museum still feels like a fever dream, i have no idea what the plot even was, i understood maybe 10% of what was happening at any given moment, and i've never had more fun watching anything. this truly is the show of all time. 5/3 roles played by gun atthaphan
Wildest GMMTV Moment
also not a bl, but the piploy pissing in the car scene as an act of revenge in wednesday club would go down in history, if, you know, people had actually watched this show. what can i even say. 3/3 gratuitous pissing scenes
Most Anticipated Show Of 2024
i just had to find a way to mention my golden blood in this post. i am yearning for this show with an intensity i cannot describe. i literally need to see joss bridal carrying gawin as much as possible, it is on the baseline of my hierarchy of needs. no matter whether this turns out to be trashy fun, high camp, an actually serious show, or all three, i win. gmmtv could not have given me anything better to look forward to next year 💖
#bl stuff#*mine#be my favorite#moonlight chicken#a boss and a babe#only friends#my school president#love in translation#never let me go#last twilight#midnight museum#wednesday club#my golden blood the series
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Until We Meet Again
Felicia Hardy x Reader
Requested by anon
Request: Hello! can I request something with Felicia Hardy/Black Cat and reader? could be anything, if it is okay. She is too underrated ❤️
I have chosen a prompt for felicia 💕 “Will we ever meet again?”
You don’t necessarily have to choose that prompt but it would be nice 🥰 thank you so much for answering so fast by the way and for reblogging those prompths❤️🤍❤️
Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters, they belong to Marvel.
Tag list: @casey-anne-j @softgamerking @morbid-gaymer @geekycatlover @rainydaysrnevergrey @natalia-helena-alianova-romanov @alphalesbianwolf @dykse @autumnjackson4 @1-danid @dynnealberto @natasharomanoffswife @aquariuslavenderhoney @spywidownat @atlas-nex
Prompt is from @linwritesif ‘s prompt list!
A/N: I hope you guys like it! 😄 Also this gif isn't mine, credit goes to whoever made it!
You had met Felicia about a year ago. It was a nice autumn night, you had decided to go up to the roof of your apartment building and look up at the sky. You knew you wouldn't be able to really see the stars in the city but still.
Felicia was traveling alone the rooftops after a successful heist, when you caught her eye. She watched you for a few moments from the rooftop across from your apartment building.
After a few moments she quickly and quietly made her way to you. "What's a gorgeous woman doing on a beautiful night like tonight by herself?" She gracefully sat down next to you.
That night you two talked and got to know each other. Almost every night since then, that spot on the roof of your apartment building became your meeting place.
xxxxx
You were in your apartment, pacing back and forth. You had heard what was going on with Hammerhead and that Felicia was somehow involved.
You knew Spider-Man was trying to help her, Felicia had told you about how he tried to help her change. Knowing what she does, it doesn't change how you feel about her. Not that she knows about your feelings for her.
Suddenly you heard an explosion in the distance, you could literally feel it shake your apartment. Rushing over to your window, your eyes widened in horror. That was Felicia's place.
"No, no, no..." You place your hand over your mouth as tears start to roll down your cheeks, your heart drops into your stomach.
A few moments later there was a knock on your door. You quickly wipe away the tears before going over to your door and looking out the peephole.
You gasp when you saw who it was, your heart pounding. You yank open the door and pull Felicia into a tight hug. "F-Felicia... but how? I saw what happened..."
She wraps her arms around you, without letting you go she moves the both of you inside your apartment and she closes the door with her foot.
"Come on, sweetheart." She smirked. "You know cats have nine lives."
You look up at her, without even thinking you lean in and kiss her. When you realized what you did, you went to pull away but Felicia held you closer and deepened the kiss.
When you both pull away from the kiss, you start to blush. Felicia moved her hand and placed it on your cheek, cupping it as she gently run her thumb over your cheekbone.
You lean into her touch. "I thought I lost you..."
"You'll never lose me, (Y/N)."
xxxxx
For a few hours you and Felicia talked. You had finally told her how you felt and she did the same. But there was something she wasn't telling you.
You and Felicia were standing at your front door, she wrapped her arms around you. "I need to go into hiding for a while, sweetheart." She gave you an apologetic smile.
You understand, but that didn't mean your heart didn't drop. "Will we ever meet again?"
"Of course we will. You'll be the first person I see when I get back." Felicia leaned in, capturing your lips in a passionate kiss.
When you watch Felicia walk out the door, you wanted nothing more than to run after her and tell her to stay with you. But you knew why she had to go into hiding and she didn't want to put you in any danger.
But you knew you would see her again.
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Please please please! Taylor or chuck hcs if you havent yet <3
I’ll do Chuck another time but for now:
A HC List but it’s just Taylor
Gaymer/j
- A restless yet ambitious fellow. He likes keeping himself busy with fun events and hanging out with friends. Very extroverted
- Has ADHD and unfortunately went through the “gifted kid to burnout” phase in his life. He wasn’t diagnosed until he entered college
- Had strict parents who always expected him to do well in school and was seen as a remarkable student, but later got burnt out due to the pressure put on him
- Video games were always an escapism for him growing up. Though his free time was limited, gaming always helped him get through rough times and even make new friends
- Took care of a stray dog when he was little and called it Luigi. His parents didn’t let him have it but he secretly took care of it whenever he showed up at his house. He was an old stray so he died after a couple years. He really wants a dog but has yet to find the time to adopt one
- Had some online friends growing up. Most of them he’s lost touch with completely, but he has a select few he still talks to occasionally
- Cameo is one of his longest-lasting online friends. They friended each other in a gaming lobby in an MMO game when they were teens and later talked through other sites like Skype (or whatever it is in their world) and now they hang out irl
- Like any gamer Taylor has had his rage quitting moments. When he was younger, they were a lot tamer but only because his parents would get mad at him for being a nuisance but he lets it all out now. The worst thing he did was impailing the tv with a broom by throwing it like a javelin
- Met Chuck as his dorm mate when he was attending college as a computer science major. After they both graduated, they decided to still be roommates to save on rent
- Knows how to rollerblade and is sometimes seen doing it on the sidewalks of Tastyville. He’s pretty good at it though he’d be lying if he said he hasn’t almost been run over in the street before because of it
- He can’t be productive unless he’s listening to music. In canon his favorite music artist is DJ Honey Buster (Hugo), but he’s not that picky. He’s even a longtime follower of Simone’s Lofi channel
- Has heavy footsteps whenever he walks or runs, and they’re so loud he’s gotten noise complaints from his neighbors, so he has to have carpet all over the floors to be quieter
- Good luck trying to get through to him whenever he’s listening to music. You’ll have to yank his earbuds to snap him out of it, which he hates people doing to him
- A horrible sleeper. He gets around like 5-6 hours of sleep at most every day and is fueled by energy drinks. Chuck has to be the one to get him to sleep sometimes
- Likes to do late-night convenience store runs to get snacks and instant ramen along with Chuck. It’s just fun and the town at night is very quiet and calm… unless Dynamoe is on the loose I guess
- After college Taylor and Chuck both had their own issues to work out which did affect their friendship for some time. This included the fact that they were crushing on each other but didn’t wanna ruin their friendship
- It was a hard thing to come to terms with, but one night alone in their apartment, Taylor took initiative and confessed and now they’re dating
- Huge retro nerd who loves collecting games and consoles from the 90s and such
- He’s the one guy at the arcade going absolutely ham on Dance Dance Revolution (or stomp stomp whatever it was called) and attracting a crowd because he’s that good at it
- Once got so many tickets playing arcade games that he got a roomba from the prize booth as a joke since he didn’t know what else to do with his tickets. Though later, him and Chuck grew attached to the Roomba and named it “Sir Robert the First”, even giving it a little top hat and putting googly eyes on it
- Not a content creator, but he’s a reoccurring person in Tohru’s gaming streams. It was totally on accident, they were playing a shooting game where people were in teams and he just happened to be in Tohru’s team. They made a pretty good duo so Tohru friend requested him and now he sometimes appears in her streams whenever he has time
- Used to be pretty hardcore into roleplaying back in the day. Especially loved DnD. The classes he usually gravitated towards was the bard or the sorcerer
- Used to have a side-hustle as a game tester for indie game creators. You wouldn’t think he’d quit doing something like this, but game-testing was too structured for him (it’s more about interacting with the game in super specific ways and stuff to make sure everything works out)
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My Drunk Confession To You (Pt. 2!!??!)
(HEY HEY GAYMERS!! I know I promised the part two yesterday but I was busy actually thinking of a plausible part two since I didn’t know it would have that much attention in such a small amount of time!! Also I was on that subway surfers grind so, yeah..)
TW: NOTHING!! Fluff, a sprinkle of angst, and a small pinch of crack.
The morning quickly came, although if we look at Yoru’s perspective, he could barely sleep. He was up most of the time, your slurred words ringing his mind. Every time he thought about it, he felt his heart beat faster, it was a very uncomfortable and new feeling for him, it was like his heart ached it hurt- but not really.
Yoru’s perspective, 2:34 am
He was tossing around in his couch as he tried his best to keep his heart calm, taking deep breaths and closing his eyes to hope he’d magically fall asleep.
Eventually, he sat up. He peered over to his bed where you laid, soft snores escaped your lips as you were hovered in a thick blanket, hair all over his pillow, soft eyes closed and deep into the planes of dreams.
And then, his heart started going crazy. It ached, it burned- even he couldn’t explain it, he wasn’t even sure if what he was feeling was an actual medical emergency or just the side effects of the well-known drug called love.
xx
You woke up, a raring and predictable headache banging through your head. You groaned to yourself, knowing you couldn’t do much to lessen the pain of the headache without getting up, which.. would be worse.
Hiding yourself in the depths of the blanket, you eventually stopped closing your eyes since you wouldn’t drift to sleep with that headache of yours.
Without much of a thought, you peeked out of the blanket which you thought was your own, just to see that you weren’t in your room. Your eyes widened as you scanned the room farther.
This wasn’t your room at all.
You opened your mouth, whispering cursed insults and incoherent grumbling.
You sat up, your headache worsening, the moment you sat up from your bed, something sharp felt like piercing through the left side of your skull. A sour, menacing look could be seen in your face.
The whole room was silent, which indicated Yoru went out.
Something in you felt embarrassed to even be here, yet something within you bloomed of happiness that he let you stay here.
You sat there for a few minutes, trying to recall what happened with your time with Yoru.
“Non, non, carry me bridal style.”
Those words rang in your ear, you felt like shuddering. If two words could express what you were feeling it would’ve been “Ew, cringe.”
“Ryo.. I love you..”
“HOLY SHIT.” You thought to yourself. “I CONFESSED TO HIM!?” Your hand was in front of your mouth as even more embarrassment bloomed, soon more emotions bloomed. Sadness, fear, even anger.
You just wanted to crawl into a hole and DIE. You didn’t even know if he even liked you that way, tears felt like bubbling through your sockets. Fear of rejection, fear of losing him, fear was everywhere in your mind.
And so, you hid in the blankets again, hoping all of this was just a bad dream and that you’d wake up, hiding your feelings, hiding from everyone.
xx
Before you could wish to kill yourself once more, the door opened. Your heart palpitated, everything felt like collapsing in your small world of one big blanket.
A tray clanked on a table as footsteps approached the bed.
“This is it, I’M GONNA FUCKING DIE. THIS IS IT. THISISIT.” You thought to yourself.
“I know you’re awake.”
“I’M GONNA FUCKING DIE, THIS IS IT. MOMMA..” You closed your eyes.
Before you could say any more profanities to yourself, your blanket was harshly removed from you, a cold woosh of air greeting you.
“Stop that, you look like a raisin.” he said, looking at your legs which was hugged to your chest, hands around your legs as your eyes shut tight.
He walked away, to the table where a plate of breakfast was sat and ready to be eaten.
You slowly sat up, yet your eyes never left the ground. He went back to you, placing the tray on a vacant space on the bed. “Make sure you take painkillers after, I know that headache’s probably killing you.” he simply said.
You just sat there, it was like you never blinked. Like you were a child who was just yelled at and is fighting off snot and tears.
And then he walked back to you, he sighed before sitting in front of you like a mother tending to it’s about to burst into tears child. “You look like you’re about to shit yourself.” he joked, as he looked at your expression further which had no sign of a smirk or any incoming snarky remark but a solemn and painful look which made his heart break.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
You didn’t think of even thinking. You just wanted to say it now that you were sober, and if it went wrong well- then it went wrong.
“Ryo- I--” you said in a strained voice.
“You love me?” he smirked. You froze, was he mocking you? This was a bad idea..
“I love you too, don’t worry.” he smiled- a genuine smile was seen in his face. You froze even more, a single tear fell, and then another one- and then another one. Your mouth gaped open as you processed everything. He chuckled before putting a spoon full of rice with food on top into your mouth. “Stop crying, you look ugly.” he laughed, as more tears fell off your eyes when you blinked. You chewed as a muffled laugh escaped your filled mouth.
You swallowed the last bit and then you looked at him. “Does that mean we’re dating now?” you asked. “Yeah, sure, why not.” he shrugged his shoulders as he smiled at you.
“Does that mean I can call you honey bunches now?”
“WHAT.”
“Wait, no, I’ll call you boo boo bear!!”
“WHAT..”
(Guys, Yoru’s my honey bunny boo boo bunches by the way 💋)
(Okay anyways.. was this short? I don’t know, but I hope you guys liked it!! SMASH THAT LIKE BUTTON AND SUBSCRIBE FOR MORE BANGERS LIKE THESE!?!!! 🤞)
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the party + social media headcanons
mike would be a twitch streamer. certified #gaymer that'll play pretty much anything. malds real fucking bad (but not in a serious, toxic way just in a funny he's a sore loser that gets dunked on way) and gets baited by his chat all the time. definitely had a moment like this and when disaster struck he just immediately ended the fucking stream lmao. he let his chat bully him into the heart rate monitor challenge exactly one time and never again because they wouldn't stop teasing him over how it went up whenever will teased him during a multi-player game. he plays with the party a lot, but people are always asking will and max to come on because they loooove will and love how max roasts the shit out of him. will drew/made his subscriber emotes ofc. on his just chatting days they'll rank things, discuss the latest star wars hot topic, or talk about movies and the art of storytelling.
dustin mostly posts on youtube. he makes videos showcasing his peculiar inventions, some of which are actually really cool engineering feats and others are more like that of the "unnecessary inventions" guy's work. he's always super happy and excited about whatever he's doing and it's really contagious. he always explains everything thoroughly and titles his videos like so: SUPER COOL TITLE HERE (REAL) (NOT CLICKBAIT!). he includes a blooper reel at the end with the jokes that (rightfully) didn't make the cut.
will is an art (+gaming ofc) streamer! he streams himself drawing on twitch and it's really laid back. he'll be working away while the chat-created playlist plays in the background, looking up intermittently to see what people are saying. people like to donate or use their points to say silly things / use any of the sound effects to get his attention. he uses the Good, Professional footage to make a timelapsed video for his youtube, because twitch is just for chilling. stream titles are something like "draw with me!", "boys night", "it's a paint kind of day", or "parallel play? on MY stream? it's more likely than you think". mike hangs around a lot and el lurks. he always says hi to people and tries to answer as many of his chatters as he can. when he games he LOVES to play horror games in the dark, especially the shitty ones. he gets lots of views on those. but he plays mostly anything, too! like nintendo speedruns or he'll play smash with his viewers. he also vlogs sometimes for his youtube. just amasses little clips throughout the week or month or whatever and tosses them together for fun and to work on his more creative editing skills. he goes through his banned list on twitch and lets the community decide if they get unbanned or not like it's a court trial or something lmao.
lucas is an instagram baddie. he doesn't even try to be one, he just is. gets hella fucking likes and comments including these emojis: 😳🫠😍🔥. writes really sweet captions. makes stupid fucking bank on ads and promos. likes to post really embarrassing zoomed-in pictures of mike and dustin on his story when they hang out, then one of himself to even it out. you already Know he's got hella selfies with max and candid shots of her<3. he and will do cute poses whenever they snap a pic together, and there's a really cute snap of lucas and the twins where their cheeks are all squished together n they're cheesin' real hard (it was them out and about downtown). has a video where he makes a shot with his back turned and the entire party's going crazy cheering, shaking him, screaming, etc etc.
max would explode my head with her mind if she heard me say this, but she's also an instagram user. she posts lots of videos of her skating. she'll post her landing a new trick and then the 3984039 times she wiped out beforehand. also takes pics of her favorite tagger's (zombie boy) work. posts selfies where she's all scraped up after wiping out or where she's got a hello kitty band-aid on her face (courtesy of el, of course). a lot of her pictures are more artsy, like instead of taking a selfie, she'll take a picture of your shoes side by side, blurry candids of whoever she's hanging out with, or pictures of places she's been. doesn't always caption them, because she likes to be mysterious. replies to the party's comments and not very many other people's.
el is mostly the girl behind the camera. she takes a lot of max's videos and pictures, helps will set up his camera when he's doing a rare tutorial, and helps mike decide which picture to use whenever he posts something. still, she does her own thing, too! she loves to post her crafts on instagram and twitter. she makes jewelry and trinkets to sell on etsy. always takes pictures of her food, her good outfits, and herself. :) her instagram has a theme and she posts updates on twitter. she always likes the party's posts and comments on them. if she's lurking on someone's stream, she'll take a picture of her screen and text it to them with a random emoji. she also posts a lot of pictures of her friends with captions so sweet they'll make your teeth rot. she likes to take the party's phones and sneak a silly selfie of herself and never tell them about it lmao. takes a super zoomed in picture of you when you're not looking and texts it to you with "hi :)" attached.
byler-specific headcanons
will and mike are always on the same team if they can be.
they fucking DOMINATE at codenames, but e|max did sweep the floor with them in two rounds once which they claim was bc of cheating.
they also play lots of minecraft (yes they put their beds next to each other n share loot thank u) (and by "share loot" i mean mike drops cool shit for will and will drops bread n meat whenever mike is getting his ass handed to him). sometimes will walks up to him and mike pauses what he's doing to turn around and will just whacks him before running away or digging a hole beneath himself. will never drops anything valuable for him because every single time he's done it, mike goes and dies in the most stupid way possible right after lmao.
mike is one of will's mods and he'll ban anyone for anything.
will is one of mike's mods, too. sometimes he comes to mike's defense when ppl are clowning him, but other times he'll just make it worse by sharing an embarrassing anecdote<3 LMAO
if will is streaming, mike always chooses to raid him and it makes will smile and blush every time.
mike hates backseat gamers and it's a bannable offense for everyone except will ofc, who is coincidentally one of the worst backseat gamers of all time lmao.
will roasts mike's taste whenever he's ranking movies on stream. they get into it but come to an eventual compromise over star wars. will tells him he's hopeless n mike is trying to respond but the chat is going crazy with sound effects and spamming L in the chat which makes mike pretend to end the stream by putting his "thank you for watching" title card up on screen lmaoooo
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Ok Gaymers I’ve gotta go to bed cuz it’s 1 am but I’m struggling to find a post for my Luis sideblog that I wanted to reference and credit properly but I can’t find it dhebehenehjdj
I think the @ was Illskemet or something????? Idk but it was a post talking about how Leon holding Luis’ hand and not saying anything spoke louder than any actual WORDS could. Sorry if that’s not a very good description of the post to help people find it my brain is uhhhhhhhh. Soup at the moment BXBEBWNNWBS
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For the gaymer ask meme: 4, 13, 19 and 25
4) Best game soundtrack (full album or single track)?
How could you make me choooooooose it's Void Stranger. Elegy of the Stars - Void Stranger Original Soundtrack. All bangers. Any game soundtrack that makes me remember every little song has done it's job in my books. If I can remember exact moments it plays then even better. I can't even pick a favourite track there is just so many good ones. Here's one though that I always loved hearing when I hit those floors - Lax Lullaby. The latter half of this track sounds so different from the front half...love it...
13) Coolest enemy/boss design?
HHRGN you know what the answer to this is you live with me. But if I had to pick one....You know what? While not necessarily my favourite of all time kinda design - the fucking clockwork sentries/soldiers from Dishonored 2
19) A game that you wish you could play for the first time again.
It's funny...the more I muse on it for sure there are ones I wish I could replay 'for the first time' again but most of them I think were played at the 'right time' in my life. It's kinda hard to image the games I'd want to experience fresh again really impacting me the way they did when I first played them. Some of it is my tastes have changed too much or what I want from a game isn't the same as it was then...part of it is also my memory is bad enough I often replay the stuff I like anyway to try and keep it in my mind so it doesn't quite work to have something I'd like to replay for the first time. haha.
25) Favorite environment in a game?
Fishing hole from Twilight Princess my beloved (one of my favourites but I have too many to list)
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#'who was this about' dont worry <3#EDIT hi i didnt realize this would get notes LOL. um everyone reblog with what character ur thinking of because im NOSEY i WANNA SEE#edit 2 to everyone trying to guess what the character i made this for was. youre all wrong. this was about kamen rider#youd think lupin because of my profile picture but alas i have other interests as well...#anis gaymer moments
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Let’s Dance (Eddie Munson x Reader)
Happy Halloween Gamers and Gaymers, fun to post on Halloween (of it’s scheduled on halloween and also doesn’t get shadow banned. This is a story based on the place I worked that I talked about last story. Oh course if you have any request, I will always have my DMs open (I’m popular enough to get bots to DM me again. Also if you like my writing, here’s is my masterlist. Hope you enjoy!
Gender-Neutral Reader (You/Yours)
Let’s Dance - David Bowie
“Let's dance
Put on your red shoes and dance the blues
Let's dance
To the song they're playin' on the radio
Let's sway
While color lights up your face
Let's sway
Sway through the crowd to an empty space”
(fun fact this is the actual roller rink I work at)
The entertainment center in Hawkins came out of nowhere. The owner of it didn’t make a big ceremony for it, it just now exists. This place has everything: a bowling alley, go-kart track, arcade, and a roller-skating rink, which you sadly work at.
You’re behind the concession counter, giving people pretzels, cotton candy, and whatever other food they’ll waste. It was a busy day, the line for concession almost felt never-ending, and it’s only you, no one to help give people what they want, just you, you have to do both.
It’s 8:15 pm, you let out an exhausted sigh, putting your face in your hands. . “Please,” you whined, “I just wanna go home.”
“You and me both, man.” A voice comes out of nowhere, you look up to see a man, around your age you presume.
You get embarrassed, scuttling to go back to your position, dropping a pen you were fiddling with. The man laughs. “I am so sorry,” you said pathetically, you weren’t sure he even heard you because the DJ decided to play the music at max volume tonight, “what can I get you?” You ask, pretending you didn’t have the biggest fail ever.
“No, I’m not getting any food,” he said, still a laugh stuck in his throat, “you looked bored so I’m deciding to keep you company.” You sigh in relief.
You laugh awkwardly, even if most customers are fine and understand you are flustered, it still catches you off guard. “Ok then, thank you, I guess?” You don’t know how to respond to something like that, a stranger doesn’t just come to you just to say hi. “Why are you here?” He said that he also wanted to go home, who was he with?
“It’s my friend’s birthday and they wanted to go roller-skating. I’m not saying I’m here against my will but I’m not into the whole skating thing,” he explained, looking over at the rink where dozens of skaters, young and old, going around the circle, “but I didn’t want to hurt their feelings so I’m here.”
“At least you’re a good friend,” you said smiling, “but judging from what you’re wearing, you don’t look like you’re enjoying the music they’re playing.”
He groaned, leaning his head back, you both laughed. “I know right!? Why can’t they play Bon Jovi, or Dio, or any good music instead of this garbage.”
“I mean, you can ask the DJ for a song request. But, in my opinion, I don’t think rock or metal music really fits the rink’s vibes.”
He shrugs his shoulders and sighs. “Well, I’m stuck here til this place closes, I doubt you want to talk for three hours straight.”
You giggle, covering it with your fist. “You might hog up the line if you do,” you try to get it out, you see him smiling, “I don’t really know you either.”
“Eddie, it’s nice to meet you,” he holds out a blinged-out hand, almost every finger has a ring on it, you take his hand to shake, they’re cool on your skin. Once he retracts his hand, Eddie looks down at the paper menu in front of him, “Hmm, you know what? Can you get me a medium Coke?” He asks, pulling out a wallet.
You give him his drink, he gives you two dollars as a tip which you take graciously (every dollar counts), and he walks away, back to his seat, which was closest to the rink and the concession stand.
~~~~
As the night comes to an end, one last song plays as you spray and clean tables: Let’s Dance by David Bowie. You know the moment it starts that your hips and feet move to the beat…kind of. As everyone was packing up to leave, you were there shaking your butt off, some of the patrons were smiling at your strange dancing, others giving you a look, and one in particular was smiling ear-to-ear.
Your ‘dance cleaning’ was absolutely adorable to watch, you mouthing the lyrics as you skip table-to-table. Eddie couldn’t help but smile like an idiot. He puts his head in his hands, making sure his friends don’t notice that his cheeks are getting pink.
As you were getting closer to Eddie and his friends’ table, you make eye contact, you stop your movements immediately, looking down at the floor, gripping your rag.
~~~~
“Alright everyone, sadly this will be our last session tonight. Please return any rental skates back to the counter, make sure you throw away any garbage, and return any pitchers to the concession stands. We hope you guys had a wonderful night and stay safe.” The DJ announces.
Almost everyone is gone, except Eddie, he wasn’t with his group, just by himself, waiting at the exit. You check everything and make sure from your manager you were good to go, it was almost midnight and all you wanted now was to fall flat on your bed.
As you walk up to the exit, Eddie stops you in your tracks. “Shouldn’t you go home? We’re closing up,” you asked.
“I am, I am driving everyone home. But I think you dropped something while you were cleaning,” Eddie hands you a slip of paper, “have a goodnight, sweetheart.” He winks and finally leaves.
You’re confused at first about what he meant by that until you look at the slip of paper. It was a phone number, and something was written under it. ‘See you soon, dancing machine’. You’re taken aback.
All you can do for the rest of the night is look at the piece. Remember when you said you would fall asleep right when you landed on your bed? Well thanks to this man, you were up all night.
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Why Are Promo Hours Always So LATE at Night smh
Heyo gaymers, the name’s Clare (she/her) and I can be your tired ace scrambled-egg-brain mutual
🐉My focused F/Os shuffle around a lot, but at the moment it is Le C/hevre and El T/opo from the C/armen S/andiego reboot cartoon. There’s. A lot of characters I like.
🎮I’m cool with sharing F/Os; if we share any or even the same medias, you should hit me up 👀! (Unless you’re uncomfortable sharing, of course)
🐉I draw, write and yell about my F/Os and S/Is / OCs… when I remember to. Activity is a bit sporadic (besides a regularly upkept queue).
🎮Come into my inbox if you wanna chat; I don’t bite!
🐉Carrd🎮
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Brain On Fire; Ch. 2
Summary: There’s nobody you can trust when your life becomes altered. How will you know what’s real and what’s a simulation?
Pairing: WandaNat x Reader
Warnings: blood, death, brainwashing, simulations, depression, suicidal tendencies
Words: 17,507
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♞please be cautious of the warnings and read at your own risk♞
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@messuhp @the-camilucha @screechcat @wittle-bunnyboo
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@diaryoflife @cantcontroltheirfear @women-am-i-right @catching-up-with-kayla @obsessed-with-wandamaximoff @beforeoursecrets
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you do not have permission to repost/translate my work or claim them as your own.
Please note that this story does not glorify depression and everything that comes with it. Do not hesitate to reach out to someone if you are struggling. Remember that you are loved, there are people who love you. Stay safe. 1-800-273-8255 ❤️❤️
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Wanda couldn't take her eyes off of your sleeping form, her head propped up by her elbow as she scanned your thoughts for an opening. Being unconscious, you couldn't keep the fire burning in your brain, your barrier extinguishing into nothing but smoke that distorted a path into your memories. And she fell down a path that you were failing to protect and, the longer she dove into your mind, the more she understood why you were struggling to decipher between reality and simulation.
To her, it felt like she was looking through warped glass, barely capable of seeing the horrors HYDRA put you through, a new way to mold soldiers to do their bidding. She watched as you replayed several moments over and over in your head, meeting your untimely demise by the hands of the people you had considered family, but what broke her heart the most was the sacred moments you'd have with her or Natasha or both, the amount of trust you show the women… only to meet the same fate as all the other simulations.
She sees now that she can't fully blame you for not trusting anybody, no longer having any reason to be frustrated with your slow progress to welcome her and Natasha back with open arms. And she's clueless as to how to get you out of this. The empty feeling in her stomach was the helplessness she felt throughout her body, incapable of dragging you out of the fire. She wanted nothing more than to hold you in her arms and let you know that everything’s going to be okay, that the three of you would get through this together, but she knew it wasn’t that easy.
She had just moved her free hand to gently place it against your cheek - the need for your warm touch had grown stronger throughout the years they had thought you were dead - when a voice cut through the air. "What is it?" Her eyes flickered over your peaceful face to see Natasha settled in a similar position as her, the redhead looking at the witch with confused concern. "What's wrong?"
Sometimes, Wanda hated how easily Natasha could read her expressions. The former assassin knew something was wrong by the way her eyebrows were slightly furrowed, how her nose was barely scrunched in concern. Natasha could see the way her eyes softened when she looked at her, the sadness hidden behind the emerald greens seeping into the spotlight the longer she contemplated the soft-spoken question that broke the silence in the air.
"I don't think there's any chance at saving her from this, Nat," Wanda confessed quietly, licking her lips and shaking her head subtly. She sucked in a deep breath, looking back towards your sleeping form, not being able to stop her thumb from automatically tracing circles against your skin. “She might be too far gone.”
Natasha pressed her lips together to form a tight, thin line as she, too, looked down at you. All the years she had dreamt about touching you again… she thought she had the ability to be able to do that once more when she had found out you were alive, but now? That would just have to remain a dream. “I’m not giving up.” She looked back at Wanda, sighing out heavily. “I will do whatever it takes.”
Wanda picked her head up to meet the former assassin’s gaze once more, her tongue flicking out to wet her lips as she breathed out slowly. “Together.” The witch nodded confidently, reaching over your body to rest her hand against Natasha’s cheek, relaxing when she leaned into the touch.
“Together,” Natasha agreed. Wanda was still learning how to control her expressions, the former assassin was highly skilled in scoping out the signs of frustration and relinquish that were exhibited on the rookie's face. And just as talented as she was to catch slightly hidden expressions, her skills matched that of her hiding them herself. Wanda couldn't see the exhaustion concealed behind the sparkle of feign hope in the redhead's green eyes.
The only thing preventing Natasha from throwing in the towel was her heart, how it beat so lively for you.
The words of the ladies you had once loved were being planted into your mind. It felt as if you were listening to someone search for a strong signal on the radio; fading in and out in the midst of static, distorted but comprehendible. Together. Was this another one of HYDRA's games? You could feel the faint touches against your cheek seemingly glitching in and out of existence; there one second, gone the next. Was this their way of telling you you've done a good job? Were they trying to reward you for behaving? The desire to believe in the reality of the situation was quickly growing stronger, and you knew that's exactly what they wanted.
And you had to get away.
Wedged between two women would’ve been a dream come true… if they weren’t dreaming of your upcoming demise. Their peacefulness in sleep brought you into a sense of tranquility, too, but it could only last so long. The edges of this simulation were malfunctioning like a TV with bad reception, your vision blurring as if you were incapable of being able to focus on just one thing. You couldn’t tell if it was your imagination or if it was real.
The lullaby… That was something HYDRA couldn’t have possibly known, right? The sentimental value to it, hummed lowly in your ears whenever you needed to hear the melody. And out of all the simulations you had gone through, this was the first time they had used it. Why would they wait until now to use something so meaningful? They surely should've known you would've been wrapped around their finger if they had exploited the simple cradle song in the beginning.
You had to get out of here without waking them, which is easier said than done. They had you positioned right in the center of the bed, Natasha's arm thrown carelessly around your stomach while Wanda was nestled against your side. If you moved to get up, they'd surely wake.
The softness the ladies showed you, the realness in their gestures... it made you not want to hurt them - though you've always had trouble before. It made you wish for the idea that this was real and not some twisted scenario HYDRA has conjured up.
You never fully understood why they're subjecting you to this kind of torture. You never really had the chance to ask them, considering your jaw was always clamped shut by that torturous mask, and when it wasn't, you succumbed to their antics while you were given the opportunity to actually rest. You had preferred the darkness over the light. The light would waver, fake with warmth and love in the form of your friends, your family… the loves of your life. The darkness was the only true thing now, the only thing that brought a sense of comfort to your never-ending nightmares. Because the darkness didn’t lie to you, the darkness didn’t tell you it loved you one second, and stabbed you the next.
This was just another simulation, another test they expected you to pass.
When Natasha's arm left your stomach, spinning around to have her back to you, you found this as an opportunity to get up.
"How long have you been awake?" You felt your heart launch itself into your throat at her sudden voice, your eyes fluttering closed for a brief moment to give your mind the opportunity to come up with an answer.
You couldn't bring yourself to look at Wanda, already predicting what'll happen if you see her green eyes, knowing how soft they are when she just wakes up. You'd lose yourself, you'd want to reach out and touch her, to pull her against you. You'd want to let down the defenses you've built inside your head; the fire in your brain, as she calls it. If you looked into her eyes, you'd let her inside. And, simulation or not, that'd haunt her for the rest of her life.
"I don't know." It was honest, truthful. You truly did not know how long you've been awake for; you don’t even know if you ever fell asleep. Their conversation - though distorted - was fresh in your memory. Another way for HYDRA to make you believe you were no longer in a simulation; making Wanda and Natasha seem upset that there was no way to save you, showing their sentimental side in a moment when you were seemingly asleep to get you to surrender. You weren’t going to.
You can’t.
Wanda released a quiet sigh as she rolled over to face you, propping her head up with her elbow. You could make out her face in the corner of your eyes - the bunched eyebrows, the flared nose, the pursed lips, all showing just how worried she is - making you want to tease her at how easy it is to read her expressions. And when she tried to graze the top layer of your thoughts, she was met with the burning inferno you keep tending to once more, only making it stronger and stronger. Her lips formed a pout, something that you had always dreaded. "Why won't you let me in?"
You stared at the ceiling above you, your jaw clenched tightly to fight against the tears burning your eyes. Your answer came out broken, a cracked whisper in the silent room, "I can't… trust you." It was four words that always destroyed you whenever you told her, though this simulation seemed to be a lot harder than the previous ones.
Then again, that's something you always think.
Wanda's lips parted slightly to show her disappointed shock, her eyes growing softer as she stared at you. And, boy, were you glad you weren't looking at her. "Y/N-"
"I've been through this too many times. It all ends the same way." You sat up, kicking the blankets off of you and stirring Natasha awake. You felt the redhead reach for you, but you easily slid out of her groggy grip as you climbed out of the bed. You made a beeline for the door.
Wanda didn't hesitate to follow you, calling out to you sternly. Your hand was reaching for the doorknob when you saw the red tendrils swirl around your fingers, undeniable in the soft darkness, your eyebrows furrowed in anger as she prevented you from opening the door. You could hear her soft footsteps march towards you, muffled thuds against the carpet, and Natasha's voice was thick with sleep when she called out for you and Wanda, though you both ignored her as the witch continued stalking towards you.
You felt Wanda grab onto your free hand, a tight grip around your wrist as she forced you to look at her. You tried not to let your fear show when she pinned you against the door, wondering if this was it. If this was the moment where this soft episode turns dark and bloody. You could see the red replacing the warm green in the mellow darkness, pure hatred, pure anger, just like any other simulation.
Foolish of you to believe that either one of them would let you go in peace.
"Go ahead," you sneered, fighting your hardest not to show just how truly afraid you were in this moment. Showing anger in return to their fury only pisses them off even more, not giving them the satisfaction they're seeking when they have you trapped in a corner. And you'll be damned to let them be satisfied with this cruel joke. "Just do it already. There's no point in trying to string me along with this touchy feely stuff. I know how this ends, so end it."
Her jaw clenched tightly and you couldn't tell whether it was anger or hurt. The way her eyes were glowing that dangerous shade of red, you settled on anger.
You couldn't help but let your shoulders slump in disappointment when she stepped away from you, her jaw still locked yet her eyes fading back to her normal green. Her hand remained on your wrist, a loose grip, as she shook her head. She wasn't going to fight you, the anger she had shown was just frustration. And looking into her eyes, the softness being portrayed in the emerald irises, you felt the sensation that she was being genuine. A brief moment of amnesty granted, letting you breathe. You didn’t understand what angle HYDRA was playing with this simulation, but you knew you couldn’t let them trip you up.
The moment of absolution didn't last long before you twisted your hand so you could grab onto Wanda's wrist, slamming her onto the ground with a swipe at her legs. Light flooded the room a moment after she gasped at the sudden loss of air, your movements faltering for a moment as you looked at the bruise around her neck, your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. And in that hesitant moment, a pair of arms wrapped around your throat from behind, tugging you off of Wanda.
You scrambled against Natasha's hold for a moment, having been taken by surprise. Wanda slowly climbed to her feet as you used your metal hand to easily pry the assassin's arms from around your neck, knocking her legs out from under her and pinning her to the ground.
"Y/N, stop!" Wanda pleaded loudly behind you, but you ignored her, desperate to keep Natasha pinned underneath you.
The assassin was quick to flip you off of her before you could make your grip firm, climbing over your body with urgency to keep you down. She gripped your chin tightly in her hand, trying to force you to look into her eyes. “Look at me. This is real, Y/N,” she grunted through the struggles of you trying to get her off, but you managed to settle down when you finally met her gaze. She breathed out, tired, as her strong grip on your chin loosened slightly. “HYDRA doesn’t have you anymore. You’re home, you’re safe, milyy.” Darling, a simple pet name. Natasha was one to use endearments when she was about to kill you, though she’d say it condescendingly. She didn’t say it so supercilious this time, her voice genuine and true. Concerned, worried, everything but patronizing. She didn’t sound like she was going to hurt you.
You felt your body relax underneath her, an old instinct that caused your heart to start hammering in your chest with confused fear. You wanted so badly to believe her, to fall back into the safety net they were seemingly providing you. And you could see the hope crossing Natasha’s face when yours fell, your hard expression softening the longer you looked into her eyes. “‘Tash?” Your voice was low, fragile, cracking on a one syllable word as your pupils dilated in horror. What was HYDRA’s play here? You had grown used to the heartless, emotionless Natasha and Wanda, only having shown any display of affection for a few minutes before they ended the simulation with death. But it’s been longer than just a few minutes.
She heard the terror in your voice, her grip loosening almost immediately when she felt you relax beneath her, and you could barely hear Wanda’s soft gasp. The fire in your brain dwindled down; not a lot, but just enough to grant her another peek into the damage HYDRA had riddled you with. She was desperate to get more answers, to see more of the scars that were planted in your mind. And everything quickly came to an end when the bedroom door was thrown open. Natasha saw the moment your wide pupils narrowed, stressed with the sympathetic spurs initiated with the escape response, and Wanda pulled out of your mind with a sharp breath the second the roaring blaze came back to scorch her. Natasha had you, even for a split second, she had you believing that this was real, that she wasn’t going to hurt you.
You used your metal arm to throw her off of you, not reacting when she slammed into the wall behind you as you jumped to your feet. You made eye contact with Clint, who tilted his head at you in confusion. He was clearly questioning how you managed to get out of your cell, but he didn’t have time to say his thoughts out loud before you were throwing punches at him. He narrowly dodged your throws, blocking your human arm with his forearm, but not being able to do the same with your metal one. You pushed your hand against his chest, sending him flying across the room.
You had to leave, already knowing that you were going to lose this battle. The simulations were always rigged to end in your death, and you wondered what would happen if you went against that cliché. You were always abiding by their rules, staying on course with the silent requirements HYDRA had given you. You were the perfect little soldier, fearful that you’d receive an even greater punishment for rebelling against their games. But what’s the worst they can do?
You marched out of the room, stepping out into the hallway to be greeted with a few stray SHIELD agents. They didn’t seem too bothered by you, some of their eyes lingering on your fading form as you stumbled past. You felt your legs speed up, running down the hall as fast as you could, desperate to get away from here. Your heart pounding in your chest, your feet hammering against the floor, your thoughts racing as you ran.
You knew there was no way you could get out of this. If HYDRA sees that you’re straying from the path, they’d probably pull you out. You haven’t tried it before, the fear and confusion kept you in check, but with the current softness the ladies are showing you, how long it’s going on, you didn’t want to hurt them. You just wanted to run.
When you turned the corner, your steps faltered to a stop when everything around you began to melt away. Your limbs froze in place, your jaw locked tightly as if something was hindering it shut. Your surroundings slowly changed, the shining, electric white of the fluorescent lights dimming into a soft, warm, yellow glow, the bright walls of the SHIELD compound evolving into dark walls, bricks falling apart due to lack of care. Your heart squeezed tight in your chest, your breathing erratic as your eyes looked around the room. You couldn't move your body no matter how hard you tried, the cackling laughter of the cold man you had grown familiar with bouncing off the crumbling walls.
Chills erupted up your spine at the sound of his harsh voice. It caused you to clench your teeth as hard as you could as your eyes closed tightly in preparation for the inevitable electrocution. The same spark of energy that sends you on your way to the next nightmare induced by the man behind the voice. Fear rushed through you, your tight heart beginning to pick up speed to match the terror in your veins.
You were suddenly pulled out of the reality, a hand tugging against your elbow causing the dark room surrounding you to fade back to the SHIELD compound right before your eyes, frozen in the same spot you had last been. And in the motion of rapidly blinking, you felt a singular tear escape its prison behind your eyelids, sliding down your cheek. Long before it reached your chin, Natasha appeared in front of you.
"Y/N…" She said your name softly, fear hidden in the thickness of her voice only you were trained to hear. She was scared, too, but you couldn't understand why. "Please, Y/N." She was begging… for what?
HYDRA screwed up. The glitch that sent you back into the dark room was clearly unintentional. The simulation wasn't done, you didn't die. They pulled you out prematurely. This has never happened before. Yet it gave you everything you needed to know: this is, in fact, a simulation. And everything around you isn't real.
The softness Natasha's revealing to you in her green eyes is fake. It's not genuine. And you were angry you were tempted to believe it. Angry that HYDRA was showing you softness and kindness that never seems to be ending, the sides of Natasha and Wanda that made you feel loved. Angry that they were giving you a false sense of safety in a place that is the exact opposite.
It wasn’t until your name was being called behind you by a certain Sokovian that you had reached out and grabbed Natasha, knowing she wasn't going to let you through without another fight. You pulled her gun out from waistband as your metal arm wrapped around her neck firmly, the barrel of the firearm pressed against her temple. You turned around in time to see Wanda rounding the corner, skidding to a halt and holding her hands in the air, showing you that she was unarmed.
Natasha didn't struggle in your grip, though she did hold on tightly to the metal arm around her neck. Maybe she feared you would choke her, knowing now just how easily you could snap her neck just by flexing. She kept her eyes on Wanda, noting the panic-stricken look on her face.
Wanda said your name calmly, moving to take a small step towards you, but immediately halting when she watched you force Natasha's head to the side by pressing the barrel of the gun harder against her temple. Her hands continued to be held in the air, showing you that she held no true threat.
"You don't have to do this." Wanda shook her head slowly, biting the inside of her cheek nervously. You readjusted your grip on the gun, your jaw locking in a tight clench. She watched as your eyes narrowed, almost cat-like, when she readjusted her footing. “Y/N, please, just put the gun down.”
There was a part of you - however small that part might be - that still wanted to love Wanda and Natasha even after everything HYDRA put you through, but this new game that was being played was really throwing curveballs at you. If this was the new type of simulation you were forced to engage in, how would you ever know if you truly escaped? How would you know if Wanda’s soft, sympathetic looks were real? How would you know if Natasha’s featherlight, loving touches were genuine? How were you going to be able to tell when they were going to turn dark?
“Look at me.” You hadn’t realized your gaze had slowly drifted off of Wanda until she spoke up to break you out of your thoughts. She was smart, having used the moment of distraction to move closer to you a few feet.
There was a crowd gathering before you, you had come to realize. All the SHIELD agents you had passed had formed a wall behind Wanda, guns in their hands yet pointed at the ground on the witch’s command. Even Clint had appeared, having shaken off the quick fight and joining Wanda. Your heartbeat was rapid, your grip instinctively tightening around Natasha’s neck as you slowly took a step back. You couldn’t stop yourself from eyeing all the people prepared to shoot you on command. And, though you had suffered death after death after death in several of these nightmares, you had always done everything in your power to avoid it on instinct.
“Eyes on me, darling,” Wanda had ordered once again, even taking a step forward to gain your full attention. Your eyes snapped onto her, taking another step away with Natasha tight in your arms. “Loosen your grip, baby, please.”
It was second nature to follow Wanda’s command. The moment you slightly relaxed your arm, Natasha gasped for air quickly, desperate to fill her lungs with oxygen to breathe. Your eyes burned with unshed tears, red forming around your pupils as your jaw clenched once again to fight against the urge to cry. “Let me go.” You had said it, you know that, but the voice that came out of your mouth felt as if it didn’t belong to you. “We’re going to walk out. Nobody has to get hurt here.”
“Take me.” It was said without a moment of hesitation, and the look that flashed on Natasha’s face told Wanda that she was pissed. But, at the moment, it didn’t seem to matter to Wanda how angry the former assassin was. “We’re going to hunt you when you walk out of here, Y/N, and we’re not going to stop until you’re found, you know that.” She took another step towards you, but you mirrored it by taking one back. Her jaw was set, her eyes were focused, her posture was straight.
For the first time in your entire life, you couldn’t read Wanda.
“No, take me,” Natasha pleaded, shaking her head against your arm. “Don’t listen to her.”
Wanda managed to maintain eye contact with you despite Natasha’s contradicting begging. She was determined. “I can help you, Y/N,” Wanda continued and you tighten your grip slightly when you feel Natasha try to escape, pushing the gun into her head once you had come to realize that you were no longer holding it against her. She took another step closer to you, but you couldn’t get yourself to move any further back. “I saw some of the stuff they did to you. I'm more of a threat, right? Take me instead.”
You stared at her for a moment, biting down on the inside of your cheek. The determination in the green eyes, the tight jaw, the set stance; you were beginning to get frustrated that she wasn't easy to read as she was once before. You had always found it simple to tell whether she was upset, easier to know whether you should console her or not. But you knew she was right, she was a bigger threat than Natasha was. And if you had Wanda tied up, you'd be able to find a way out of this simulation. You'd be able to find a way out of HYDRA's hands. You'd be able to find a way home.
You sent her one stiff nod and, for a split second, you watched the strong-minded expression waver to a look of relief, nodding her head confidently as she moved towards you in assertive strides.
“Wanda-” Natasha suddenly tugged against your arm in a desperate effort to reach her, but it caused you to snap out of Wanda’s mesmerizing eyes to remember the situation on hand. You kicked the back of Natasha’s legs, forcing her to kneel on the ground in front of you. With your hand gripping her shoulder tightly, she couldn’t go anywhere when you pressed the barrel of the gun to the back of her head. You looked down at the red hair, grown out longer with time. She was shaking her head subtly towards the witch, angry that Wanda was doing such a thing.
Wanda reached you, stepping to your side. She didn't dare touch you, staring at you carefully. “Y/N-”
“I have to do it.” Your finger pressed against the trigger lightly, sucking in a deep, shaky breath. “I don’t want to, but I have to.” You scoffed as Wanda chewed the inside of her cheek, looking at the side of Natasha's face with helplessness. “That’s what they want me to do. That’s the whole point of the system!”
“You don’t have to, Y/N.” Clint’s voice made you look up, seeing all the SHIELD agents behind him now aiming their guns at you. With Wanda no longer in control of the situation, they had all taken to the archer’s command. “This isn’t who you are. You love her, you’re not gonna shoot her.”
You met Clint’s eyes, eyebrows furrowing at the sudden spasm of pain in your bones when you felt your shoulder twitch in rhythm with the glitch that flashed across your field of vision, being aggressively reminded of HYDRA's game. You wondered why Wanda didn't move to prevent you from shooting Natasha, why she didn't move to kill you. She was only watching, her hands still slightly raised to show her innocence.
“You got me, Y/N,” she whispered. She was so hellbent on being taken as hostage, you couldn't help but wonder why. "There's no need for anybody to get hurt. Just let her go."
Your nose burned in accordance to the tears begging to form in your eyes. You were vaguely aware of the small, quick steps Clint was taking to get close to you. You knew his intention. Though Wanda and Natasha were taking it slow, showing you an extended soft side, you knew they could make Clint be the one to end that.
You had no other choice but to raise the gun up and aim it at the man you had once viewed as a friend. "Stop."
"I can't let you go, Y/N," Clint announced, listening to your command. "It doesn't matter what Wanda says."
"It's not up to you," you snarled, shaking your head. "Not anymore." You pulled the trigger, the sound of the shot triggering the flurry of bullets from the agents standing guard behind him.
Wanda was quick to react, throwing up a red, translucent shield to prevent any harm coming your or Natasha's way, the bullets bouncing off harmlessly. You watched through the shield as Clint fell to the ground. You didn't show the regret you felt at the sight of your fallen friend, and you didn't show the relief that flooded through you when he moved to hold the wound against his shoulder.
If you wanted him dead, he would've been dead.
"Stop shooting!" Natasha's shouts were barely heard over the clangor of gunshots, resorting to waving her hands at the agents until they got the hint. You had taken a step away from her, aiming your gun down at her when she spun around to look up at you from her spot on the ground, her eyebrows creased deeply and you couldn't decide if she was angry or worried. "Y/N-"
"Don't." You shook your head.
"This isn't a game, Y/N, this is real," she declared. "You’re going to kill someone and there’s no restart button. So, please, just-" She flinched at the sound of the gunshot, yet she remained unharmed. If it wasn't for Wanda, the red tendrils of her magic swirling around your wrist to force your arm to aim at the ceiling, you would've killed her. Your jaw was set, your eyes cold; she saw that you wouldn't have regretted killing her.
"We're leaving, yeah?" She nodded her head in sync with yours, the red shield she was holding up evaporating as she took a step back.
Natasha watched you and the witch walk away, her body subtly shaking as she breathed out.
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Wanda watched you carefully; you could feel her eyes burning a hole in the side of your head, but you kept your eyes focused on the car in front of you. Her expression - based on what you could see in your peripheral vision - was soft and understanding yet curious and wary. The one-handed grip you had on the steering wheel didn't go unnoticed by your companion, how the pressure of the taut grasp caused your knuckles to be bone-white, while your other hand - the metallic arm hidden by the sleeve of a sweatshirt - remained firmly in your lap, a loose hold on the gun aimed at her.
"Y/N." Your head tilted towards her at the sound of her voice, but you refused to acknowledge her calling for you. She was soft-spoken, a light murmur in the air between you and her, and your jaw clenched tightly as you fought every instinct in your body. You wanted to look at her, to revel in that warmth showing in her eyes, but your head couldn’t fully wrap around anything but the fact that this wasn’t real, and it was only HYDRA’s mirage.
You knew you were going to have to switch cars, or start trekking on foot. Shooting Clint brought a huge advantage, if HYDRA wanted to keep that genuine feeling going, you were safe to assume that Natasha would seek him immediate medical attention before diving into the hunt for you, but with the GPS trackers installed in every SHIELD vehicle, they would find you relatively quickly; head start or not. You had to ditch the car.
“Y/N.” You finally tore your eyes away from the road to look at her, eyebrows scrunched in confusion. You met her gaze, the sparkle in the green irises never failed to make your stomach churn. You had to look away from her, looking back at the car in front of you. Why wasn't this car moving? Traffic in New York was always a nightmare, but it was never this bad.
"Why?"
Silence. No response. Was it HYDRA trying to figure out what to have her say? You couldn’t help but laugh at the situation, shaking your head as you breathed out a heavy sigh.
“Why what?”
You turned to look at her once more, your lips pursed together tightly as you silently berated yourself for always getting lost in those damn eyes. “Why are you not-” You cut yourself off, shaking your head as you chewed the inside of your cheek. There were a million questions running through your mind and you found it difficult to focus on just one of them. Why was she not killing you? Why was she being so cooperative? Why is she so soft and warm and patient? Why, why, why, why?
“I don’t know what you want, Y/N,” she responded cautiously. “I can’t read your mind.”
“I don’t want you to read my mind,” you quickly assured with a scoff. “I’m not going to let HYDRA play anymore mind games on me.”
“You let me in before.” She was whispering now, barely a mutter that reached your ears, but you heard her loud and clear. She watched your eyes narrow as your jaw set, your eyebrows furrow in distaste as you tilted your head to the side dangerously. She cleared her throat, knowing she should pull back from this conversation, but the desperation to reach the person you once were was stronger than any other instinct she had. The next words out of her mouth were louder, “It was you, me, and Nat. We were in… in a car. And, out of nowhere, you started to… strangle her.”
You didn’t think it was possible, but your jaw clenched harder than it was five seconds ago. Your head shook, water forming at the bottom of your vision, and your grip on the steering wheel only tightened. You wanted her to stop talking, but you were incapable of unlocking your jaw wide enough to warn the Sokovian.
“I was sleeping, but I woke up,” she continued, her eyes melting into yours, “and you… did whatever it took to stop me from helping her.” You remember, the sound of her bones breaking in your hand always managed to make you flinch.
You managed to choke out her name, a desperate plea for her to stop, that she had already said enough, and there was a moment of pause in her story. A hesitation in her next words as she looked at you, her shoulders slouching as she breathed out slowly.
“But you couldn’t do it,” she muttered, sucking on her bottom lip for a moment. “You couldn’t kill her, you couldn’t kill me. They didn’t break you. Three years, Y/N, and you still won’t kill us.”
Your movement was quick, the gun in your hand aimed right in between her eyes in a heartbeat. “Won’t I?” Your chin trembled as you breathed in gradually, the click of the gun’s hammer reverberating in your head. Your hand was steady, but your heart was hammering in your chest at an unbelievable pace. Wanda remained quiet, the tension in the air suffocating you as you met her gaze behind the weapon. And when you looked down at her neck, you huffed in frustration as you brought the gun back to your lap, averting your gaze to the steering wheel. You were unaware of the relieved breath Wanda released as you smacked your palm against the wheel as hard as you could, ignoring the sting spreading throughout your hand. “Why are they doing this?!” Your voice strained your throat with how loud you had yelled. “I just want them to stop!”
You felt your muscles tense when there was a knock against the window, your head snapping towards the source and your grip on the gun tightened. Wanda was quick to position herself in the crossfire when she saw your finicky response, your eyes narrowing as you looked at the police officer over her shoulder. Wanda moved to roll the window down, ignoring the quiet word falling from your mouth in an attempt to deter her.
"Good morning, officer." You didn't need to see her face to know she was sending the man a friendly smile, the man bending down to peek into the car. With the way Wanda was positioned, though, he couldn't get a good view of the gun in your lap. And you were finding yourself grateful for the vehicle to have a set of clothes stowed away in the trunk, granting you a hoody and a glove to hide the arm you had grown to despise.
How odd was it for a policeman to just walk straight into traffic just to knock on someone’s window?
"You two okay?" He glanced over her, making eye contact with you for a brief moment. You purse your lips together, sending him a tight, stiff nod. “I heard you yelling, thought I’d check in.” His face was compassionate when he looked at Wanda, but his eyes were analyzing when he looked at you. “Are you sure you’re okay, ma’am?” He returned his attention to Wanda, and it couldn't be any more obvious that he was staring at the bruise on her neck. You were sure the smile she was sending his way seemed to be forced; it really wasn’t looking good for you. You tilted the gun up a little more, lining it up with the man’s head just in case.
“We’re okay.” You looked away, tracing the car’s logo engraved on the steering wheel with your eyes as realization hit you. Wanda was no longer bad at hiding her emotions, lying to the officer so expertly. Hell, even you almost believed her. “Thank you, sir.” The man sent one last look towards you before going on his way. As Wanda rolled up the window, she asked, “What’s the plan here, Y/N?”
“There’s not much I can do in the middle of a traffic jam.”
“We’re not in traffic.” You could feel her eyes on you once again as you furrowed your eyebrows, picking your head up and looking at your surroundings. "We've been parked for twenty minutes."
She was right, you had been sitting on the side of the street; no wonder why the car in front of you wasn't moving. But twenty minutes? Time was always wonky in the simulations, feeling as if only five minutes have passed when it's really been an hour. You weren’t presented with any way to keep track of time in this world, the clocks planted around were always off. You had given up trying to time out the simulations a long time ago, figuring it was no use. One could last merely ten minutes while the next one could last five hours. But this one? Well, this one seemed to be the longest so far. You just wanted it to end.
Wanda continued to watch you, relaxing back into the seat as your grip on the steering wheel finally loosened. You turned towards her once again, your lips pursed together in thought.
With your hand gripping Wanda’s shoulder tightly to keep her in check, the two of you marched down the streets of New York. Your eyes couldn’t seem to stay straight, inspecting each face you pass. It was typical for the amount of people out and about this early, making their way to work or school. You didn’t know where you were going, just that you were trying to get away. You had almost shot Natasha, killed her just like HYDRA has been training you to do. And if Wanda hadn’t gotten in the way of that, you would’ve pleased them. It’s all a part of their game. Wanda always saves Natasha. The Avengers always save each other. They never save you. And it’s just a matter of time before they accomplish what they’re programmed to do. You only had to beat them to it first.
“Where are we going?” Wanda’s head remained forward, voicing a quiet inquiry that caught your ears despite the loudness of your surroundings. You had no intention of answering her question anyway, risking a glance over your shoulder as you continued marching forward, but the gasp that escaped Wanda’s throat caused you to bring your attention back in front of you. “We’re sorry,” she quickly stated, feeling your hand grow empty when she kneeled down. It took you a moment, but you had realized that you had led her into bumping against someone, the briefcase in their hand unclasping open, papers spilling out onto the sidewalk. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at the ultimate cliche HYDRA was hand delivering. They were stalling you, giving the Avengers more time to find you and end the simulation. This is what they wanted. They don’t want you to run, they want you to fight.
You had no patience for this, leaning down to loop your hand around Wanda's arm with the intention of pulling her to her feet. There was no point in helping the man pick up his papers, and it wouldn't do you any good wasting time offering him a hand. It wasn't necessarily your fault that he wasn't watching where he was walking, though it was absolutely your fault that you weren't watching where you were walking. You felt your body jerk along with the pain-inducing glitch flashing across your vision, catching a piece of paper on the ground transform before your eyes, the letters that formed seemingly boring words shift to display something you’d find in a file. It was your name that caught your attention, causing your jaw to lock tightly, bending down further to scoop it up, quickly scanning sentences despite the amount of redacted words.
The asset, Y/N, has displayed a fear of hurting the █████, specifically Agent █████ and █████. Dr. ████er has yet to show what she is truly capable of through the simulations. Don’t trust █████.
“Y/N.” You came back to your senses, sniffling your dripping nose as you looked up. The business man held the opened briefcase towards you, waiting for your cooperation in placing the few pieces of paper you held onto tightly to the unorganized stack. You blinked away the burning sensation in your eyes, your eyebrows furrowed deeply as you slowly straightened your form, the other two following suit.
“Thank you,” the man said, still waiting for the rest of his work, though you could tell his patience was quickly wearing thin. You needed the rest of the papers. Though some of it is redacted, maybe there’s was something hidden amongst the mess HYDRA’s trying to hide, something that could tell you why they were doing this to you. The glitches in the simulation were causing them to lose their touch. They were revealing themselves. And this was your chance to get a step ahead of them.
“Give me the briefcase,” you expressed, ignoring Wanda’s curious eyes. The man’s face fell into confusion, his head tilting to the side as you used your free hand to reach for the case, but it was his instinct to pull away from you. He shook his head quickly, rejecting your command. “You’re stalling.”
“Look, just keep the papers,” he expressed, snapping the briefcase shut. “I’m already late for work, I have to go-” His voice immediately caught in his throat when you moved swiftly, reaching behind you to pull the gun out of your waistband, holding the case against his chest as he took a small step away from you.
“Give me the briefcase,” you said more slowly, dangerously. You knew you were being sabotaged, the man doing everything in his power to give the Avengers more time to catch up, making your large head start be wasted. “I don’t want to kill you, but I will.”
“Y/N-”
“Shut up,” you snapped, not bothering a glance at Wanda. “It’s a simulation. He’s not going to actually die. He’s not real.” Just like you. You breathed out, shaking your head. There would be no harm in shooting him, you realized. No, it isn’t real life. He wouldn’t actually feel it despite being programmed to portray pain. He would scream out in agony, fall to the floor and coddle his wound, but it was only a ploy to get you to feel bad. You couldn’t afford to be arguing with him over his briefcase, and the gunshot that echoed in your head caused everybody around you to scramble away in a panic.
Wanda gasped sharply when the man fell to the ground as you had predicted, clutching his bleeding shoulder as he shouted. You gestured for Wanda to grab the briefcase, your hand gripping her wrist tightly once she followed your command. You held the gun in your other hand as you continued down the sidewalk, pushing against the scrambling people as you reached the corner. You needed to think, and the screams of the pedestrians weren’t giving you the silence you needed to do that.
You looked around, trying to pinpoint exactly where you were. Knowing that if you knew your location, maybe it’d be easier to find somewhere to hide for a second. To give yourself a quiet place to think. But nothing was coming together in your mind, incapable of piecing it like a puzzle. You hated to admit it, but the past simulations seemed to be much easier for you. You weren’t on the run, desperate to try and find where the hell you were because they had placed you in similar places. The compound, the park, jewelry stores, banks. It was the same places scattered without pattern. Now you were in new territory, adventuring on your own. Why wasn’t HYDRA pulling you out? Were they - just as you - curious to see how far you could go? Or was this their way of finally breaking you? Giving you that small feeling of hope that you'd escape only to drop the hammer when you finally let your guard down.
You needed to get out of here. And to get out of here quickly, you needed a new car. Your feet were moving before you had time to come up with a plan, marching up to a car waiting at a red light and tapping the barrel of the gun against the window lightly. You opened the door before they could peel off, waving the gun at them as you ordered their vacancy from the car. “Get in,” you told Wanda, handing the driver the keys to SHIELD’s vehicle as you tucked your weapon into your waistband. You half expected her to run away, to use her powers to stop you, so you were surprised when she rounded the car to get into the passenger’s seat, placing the briefcase on the floor by her feet as you soon joined her in the vehicle. You didn’t bother waiting for a greenlight, veering off to the right and ignoring the honking coming from irritated drivers behind you.
Wanda watched you carefully as you drove down the street, shaking your head as you mumbled under your breath. Her eyes were gentle, and the desire to touch you only burned brighter with each second she watched you mentally struggle through your eyes. “You shot that man,” she expressed. “Y/N never would’ve done that.”
“He’s fine,” you quickly stated. He isn’t real. None of this is real. Nobody’s actually hurt. You needed those papers, and he wasn’t giving them to you. You had no option but to shoot him. He didn’t give you the choice. He was being stubborn, keeping the answers to the problem to himself, letting you suffer pure torment.
Wanda watched your grip tighten on the steering wheel, your knuckles turning bone-white on your human hand once again while your metal arm seemed to have not flexed at all. Her eyes flickered to the side of your face, replaying that moment in the bedroom in her mind. If you wanted to, you could've ended Natasha and Clint easily with your new arm; just a heavy fist to their chest could crush their ribcage as if you were punching through water. But you didn't. You pulled back your attacks to spare them. As you had when shooting Clint. She knew your skill with a gun, the archer would've been dead in mere seconds if you wanted him to be, but you shot him in the shoulder instead. No lethal harm done.
But it still remains; you would've executed Natasha if Wanda hadn't gotten in the way.
Your head tilted to the side briefly as your jaw clenched against the sudden jolt of pain, a twitch spurred on by the glitch that crossed your field of vision, and the movement didn't go unnoticed this time. She wanted to reach out to you, to touch you, but she bit back that urge. "Where are we going?"
"Away." You wanted to get as far from SHIELD as HYDRA would allow you. They would pull the plug on you eventually, they have to. Especially with one of your missions sitting in the seat next to you, unharmed, untied, free. Maybe they just wanted to see what exactly you were capable of, knowing they were guiding the Avengers to your location with every passing second.
You couldn't get away from them no matter what you did.
"The bruise." You cleared your throat, sending a quick glance towards Wanda to confirm the discoloration was still plaguing her neck. It was. "Why is it still there?"
"It takes longer than a day for a bruise to heal," Wanda returned softly. She continued to watch you, licking her lips quickly as she added, "What can I do?" You risked taking your eyes off the road to briefly glance at her, your eyebrows furrowing deeply at her question. Not only was she not killing you, but she was offering to help you.
"I need to think." You shook your head, your jaw clenching tightly as your thoughts ran circles in your mind. "And stop looking at me with those-" You huffed, looking out the window to your left briefly in an attempt to avoid her gaze. "Just… stop looking at me." You figured it would’ve just been easier to let them end the simulation at this point. The stress from trying to survive, from trying to escape, it was wearing you down. Everything up to this point, you always knew how it was going to end. But this world… you didn’t know what to expect. You were going in headfirst without any clue as to what you’re going to end up facing.
Wanda had followed your command, diverting her attention to the windshield in front of her. You couldn’t get your mind to process your surroundings no matter how hard you tried, feeling as if you were looking at an unfocused picture of the city. Your heart picked up speed once again at your incapability to point out any landmarks you should be able to recognize, nothing jumping out at you as you drove down the road. Were you even in New York anymore?
“Where are we?” Wanda's head turned back towards you at the sound of your voice, pursing her lips together in a tight line as she watched you survey the environment, eyes frantically searching for anything that looked familiar. After all the years you've driven through this city, having memorized practically every building you'd pass, you were ultimately lost. "I just need to know where we are."
She tore her eyes off of you to look out the window. She knew where you were, having taken this route many times with you and Natasha, but she figured it wouldn't do any good to point out a random building and claim to know what it was. Your trust was wavering enough as it is. But, knowing what was coming up as you finally slowed down to obey the law and stop at a red light, she turned back to face you. "Take a left."
You sent her a wary glance, eyebrows furrowed ever so slightly as your thumb tapped impatiently against the steering wheel. She could hear the gears turning in your mind, most likely listing off the pros and cons of listening to her. Were you really willing to follow HYDRA's command so quickly? If anything, the entire logical side of your brain was screaming at you to do the exact opposite of Wanda's direction, your hand twitching to turn the car to the right instead.
When the light turned green - and way against your better judgement - you took that left. It wasn't until you drove down the street that you saw it, the large, abandoned warehouse that sat at the end of the road, clearly untouched for years. Your grip on the steering wheel went slack as the memory flooded through you, nostalgic with love and smiles.
"You remember?" Wanda's voice cut through your mind, bringing you back to the present. You glanced at her, the car continuing to roll forward. "This was our first mission after becoming official, just the three of us. You, me, Nat. We prevented an organization of inventors from creating a weapon that had the potential to destroy the city." You had to look away from her, that warmth in her eyes returning to lure you into yet another trance.
You were tired of falling for it.
"You had gotten cocky," she continued as you watched the building get closer and closer, "and you wanted to make it a challenge. Whoever incapacitates the most people wins." You could feel her eyes bleeding into the side of your face, your fingers flexing tightly around the steering wheel as the car came to a slow stop. "Natasha, of course, was game, but I took just a little bit more convincing."
"This proves nothing," you whispered, looking at her.
"But the competition went a little sideways." She carried on as if you hadn't spoken, causing you to roll your eyes and turn away from her once again. "You got hurt, and my heart…" You remember it, the pain from seeing the tears on Wanda and Natasha was a lot worse than the pain from getting shot. But those were much, much simpler times compared to now. "Tell me this, Y/N" - the way she said your name pulled your attention back to her - "does HYDRA know that that was the day I decided I would do anything to save you and Nat?"
"Wanda-"
"Do they know that was the day my love for you came to be?"
"Enough."
"Do they know that I was an absolute mess when I was told you died three years ago?"
"I'm still dead!" Your jaw clenched so hard, you could've sworn you heard it lock into place. And then you laughed, a humorless, monotone sound. "At least it feels like it." You scoffed, shaking your head as you chewed the inside of your cheek, looking into those brilliant, emerald irises as the anger and fury flooded through your blood. "I'm not who you think I am and you're not who I think you are. This - all of this - is HYDRA mind-fucking me and I'm not going to play by their little rules anymore. The only reason you're still alive, Wanda, is because you look and sound like one of the women I love." Loved… but you weren’t ready to face that yet.
You saw the hurt flash in her eyes, her lips pursing tightly to prevent the emotion from showing on her face. And, though it was hard to witness, you knew it was just another play by HYDRA to deceive you.
You reached behind you, discharging the weapon and waving it at her. "Let's go."
She breathed out slowly, bringing her bottom lip in between her teeth before she ultimately opened the car door and climbed out. She gripped the briefcase tightly in her hand as she walked around the car, meeting you on the other side only for you to gesture to her to keep walking. You followed her, the gun aimed promptly at her back. This was your game now, you controlled the outcome.
SHIELD had made quick work of clearing out the warehouse back then when the mission had been completed, and it has been vacant ever since as evident by the boarded up windows and dust covering what was left of the cheap furniture. Your body tensed as if you were being tased, another glitch crossing your field of vision granted you a brief look at what the warehouse used to be as if it was pulled straight from the deepest part of your memories, but you ignored it as you led Wanda through the main area and into the winding halls. Your eyes were searching, scanning the doors with faded stickers labeling what was what.
“Y/N-”
“Stop.” You huffed, looking at the back of her as she continued walking forward. “I didn’t take you to be nostalgic. I took you because you’re the biggest threat the Avengers had that was in reach.” Quite honestly, it was foolish of her to volunteer to be your hostage. Not that you were complaining, you just couldn’t help but question what the hell HYDRA’s deal is here.
She stopped walking, turning to look at you with her bright, sparkling green eyes. “I was going to say the manager’s office is right here.” She gestured towards the door she stopped in front of. “This is what you’re looking for, right?” You looked at the door, barely capable of catching the words on the ripped label, and you nodded as you gestured for her to enter.
The manager’s office was the only room in the warehouse that granted you a full view of nearly every entrance that led into the place, with the exception of the back door, but you recall it having been sealed shut a long time ago. The moment HYDRA decides to throw you another curveball and lead the Avengers here, you’d see them coming. You felt more in control here, rather than being placed with the team, they were being placed with you. And you weren’t going to let them win anymore.
“Open the briefcase.” You watched her set the case onto the old desk as you closed the door, her features contorting into confusion as she looked down at it.
“It’s locked,” she explained calmly, her voice soft, turning it around to show you the numbered dials on the front, securely locking it shut. She shook her head, looking down at it as she added, “I don’t know the password.”
Your jaw clenched shut as your fist tightened around the gun with care. You shook your head, stepping towards her. “You know it,” you countered. “Of course you know the code. It’s a simulation that you’re a part of! You're literally programmed to know!” You laughed, but there was, once again, no humor to be found in the sound. “Stop playing this stupid little game, Wanda, and just put the code in.”
She shook her head slowly, cautiously, and you pressed your hands against your head, feeling the cool metal touch of the gun and robotic fingers against your temples as your eyes fluttered close. “I’m sorry, Y/N, but I really don’t know it.”
Your hands clenched into fists as you removed them from your head, opening your eyes to look at Wanda. Her sudden ability to hide her emotions from you - displaying only a screen of smoke in her eyes to conceal what used to be an open book - bothered you. It made you grind your teeth in frustration, tucking the gun behind your back as you crossed the small office to reach the desk. She didn’t know what was going to happen, her pupils dilating in fear to the point where only a sliver of green can be seen, but you disregarded the brief moment of the open window to her soul as you gripped the briefcase in both hands. The metallic snap the case made when you broke it open satisfied the irritation briefly as you gripped the top paper in your hand.
You couldn’t stop the indent appearing in between your eyebrows when they pressed together at the irrelevant graph printed out on the paper. You shook your head, mumbling disappointment under your breath as you tossed the report to the ground and grabbed the next one, only for it to hold the same useless information. Nothing seemed to make sense to you anymore, your mind scrambling to find what you were looking for as you tore the briefcase apart, paper flying as you moved through it quickly. You lip curling in rage, fury boiling your blood as you threw the case against the wall, defeated.
You didn’t know what to do anymore. HYDRA had plenty of time to fix the mistakes and glitches that you had encountered from the time you saw it. You were never one step ahead of them as you were led to believe, they were always fifteen steps ahead of you. And the realization of that dawned on you, your shoulders slumping with exhaustion as you turned your back to Wanda.
Her eyes were glued to you as you took a few steps away from her, interlacing your fingers behind your head as a somber laugh escaped the back of your throat. “Y/N-”
“They sure do love their games,” you expressed. Your head shook as you turned around to face her, but you couldn’t look at her; she could see the vulnerability written on your face for the first time since the hospital room. The only difference between now and then, this time it feels more genuine. “I was never going to win. I’m never going to get out of this. I am never going to see them again.” Your lips pursed to form a thin line, your head still shaking as your arms fell back to your sides. “I’m just going to have to suffer this… these lies every day for the rest of my life. These fake versions of- of the women I-” You huffed, breathing out lightly as you took your bottom lip in between your teeth to stop it from trembling. And when you spoke, your voice was a soft whisper, "I just want them back."
She watched your form straighten, your eyes sparkle with another idea. And, for a moment, for a split second, she held onto hope. Hope that you had finally faced the truth that this is all real, and her lips twitched up into a brief smile. She took a tiny step towards you, her hand yearning to reach out for you, to hold you as you accepted the reality.
“You won’t kill me,” you conveyed. “HYDRA is- is…” Wanda’s hope faded away when you pulled the gun out, watching the barrel aim right towards her. She was frozen, eyes hard as she looked at you. You couldn't see anything anymore, having pulled up the divider to conceal her true feelings once more. Yet, even as your finger hovered over the trigger, you couldn't bring yourself to shoot. No, this version of Wanda was too similar to the real one, the one you hold dear in your memories. It made it more difficult to kill. So, with a shake of your head, she watched in horror as you pressed the gun against your temple. This was a change in the game they couldn't have seen coming. “I have to show them that I won’t play by their rules anymore.”
“Y/N, no.” She held her hands up slowly, her head shaking as she sucked in an uneven breath fueled by fear. She moved forward when your eyes snapped onto her, readjusting your grip on the gun as your finger pressed very lightly against the trigger. “Please, don’t.” Her voice was trembling, her hands held out towards you as she took small, wary steps towards you. “Don’t do this, Y/N, please. This isn’t their simulation. This is real. I'm real. If you shoot yourself, you will be gone forever. And- And I can’t lose you. Not again. Not like this.”
Your eyes were red with tears as you held up a finger at her, taking a step back. “No. No. I’m not going to fall for the softness anymore.” There was a thumping you could hear, muffled yet loud, and it took you a moment to realize that you could hear just how fast Wanda’s heart was beating in her chest. And, when you looked into her eyes, you noted that she had once again let go of that smoky screen in those green irises to show you just how truly afraid she was. “I just want it to stop, Wanda. They can’t control me if I don’t let them. And the only way it ends is when I die."
"No!" The way her voice strained in desperation forced you to freeze, your finger pressing against the trigger as her head shook rapidly. She took another step, small and stealthy, and you were too lost in her eyes to notice it. “There’s a voice in your head,” she started, her voice soft and gentle, “saying it’s all pretend.” You suddenly lost the ability to move, your limbs frozen in place, your breath shaking as it escaped the small part in your lips. Your finger poised on the trigger, tensing in preparation to finish the job for her, but there was something telling you to wait. To listen. Because the look on Wanda’s face screamed realism. When you blinked, she was closer than she was two seconds ago, her body mere inches from yours. “Please, Y/N.” Her hands were slow, moving to cover yours on the gun. You didn’t fight back when she gradually moved the weapon away, and you hated how easily you allowed her to take it from your hand, giving you no form of defense. No tool to end it. “Don’t listen to that voice.”
The clattering of the gun falling to the ground echoed in your skull, but you made no move for it. Instead, you leaned into Wanda’s touch when she brought your face in between her hands, her touch warm and light and it filled your veins with a burning desire to close the distance. “Wanda…” Your voice was small, weak, broken, and she smiled softly at you as your shoulders relaxed underneath her fingers. You gave in, allowing yourself to believe that this moment between you and her wasn’t a simulation conducted by HYDRA, that the Wanda standing in front of you was the real Wanda, the loving and gentle Sokovian you had fallen in love with.
She started humming, a familiar Russian lullaby that caused your shoulders to slump even further as you fell into a state of tranquility. It was an instinct, a second nature to move closer to her as you, for the first time in what felt like forever, permitted yourself to believe that you were free from HYDRA’s hold and was back in the arms of one of the women you love.
“I’m so sorry,” you whispered, incapable of bringing your voice louder than that in fear of ruining what was happening as your eyes averted to the dark bruise on her neck. You suddenly felt exhausted, your eyelids heavy as you blinked once, twice, three times before you found it suddenly difficult to open your eyes, pressing your forehead against hers. “I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay, Y/N.” Her voice, such as yours, was low. A gentle murmur in the space between you and her as she, too, didn’t want to disturb the moment with anything louder. She could feel her thumb catch a tear that rolled down your cheek, and she released a soft breath when she had come to the conclusion that she had done what she thought was impossible. “I love you so much.”
Your mouth formed the sentence, having the simple three words that held a deep, personal meaning on the tip of your tongue. Your lips brushed against hers, and everything inside your body wanted to give in to the feeling, to feel her soft, warm lips against your own, but it all ended way too soon when you heard the approach of a car, tires rolling against the broken asphalt just outside the doors. Your eyes snapped open, removing yourself from Wanda as you marched past her, stepping up to the window in time to watch Natasha enter the warehouse. Most of the Avengers soon followed, a few random SHIELD agents sprinkled in there as well. Anger was quick to seethe your blood, obliterating away any inch of softness that you had allowed in. Your fists clenched tightly by your sides, your teeth grinding harshly as your jaw locked. It was a trap. And you were, yet again, fooled by HYDRA.
“Y/N-” Wanda gripped your arm from behind you, but you were quick to throw her off. You didn’t flinch when her body flew into the wall, and you didn’t bother checking on her unconscious form as you stormed out of the manager’s office with a brand new agenda.
If HYDRA wanted you to take out the Avengers, then you were going to take out the Avengers.
“Spread out into groups,” Steve declared, releasing an irritated grunt when he saw that Natasha had already gone off on her own. “We pinged Wanda’s phone to this location, so they have to be here. Don’t separate.” Steve turned, watching as Clint and Tony went off on their own, a couple of agents following them.
The shadows had grown to become your friend, not just from your time in the simulations produced by HYDRA, but as a SHIELD agent in the real world, too. It allowed you to hide, blending into the darkness to near perfection, fooling whoever walked by in the hall as you pressed yourself against the wall. Your breathing was slow, your heartbeat steady, and your footsteps were silent as you slunk into line behind them, gradually advancing like a tiger hunting its prey. Your arms wrapped around the nearest agent the moment they were at arms length, your hand clamping over their mouth as you dragged them into the shadows before the other two could notice your arrival. They struggled in your grip, their heart beat loud in your ears as terror engulfed them. Your eyes were glued to the wall across from you, allowing your mind to drift as your hold on their throat tightened. Your jaw clenched, and it wasn’t much longer that your heart was the only thing beating in your ears as their struggle came to a complete stop.
Their body fell to your feet as your hold on them loosened gradually, a breath parting your lips as your head slowly turned to where Tony had gone. Your mind swam, foggy and disoriented as you felt the moment you fully accepted your role in this game. Pawn, asset, machine, killer. The new fist of HYDRA. You were to be whatever they wanted, to do whatever they needed. It finally clicked inside of you, snapping into place as you had grown tired of being pulled into the pits of love only to be deceived over and over and over again.
Your strides were confident, quiet. As strong as an ox yet as sly as a fox. You closed the distance between you and the second agent, pulling her out of sight just as Tony turned around. He found that he was alone, doubling back as he searched for not only you, but his small team. You could feel the bone in her neck crack underneath your hand, making quick work of this agent, forcing Tony to stop dead in his tracks as the fallen agent collapsed into view. His heartbeat was off the charts as you stepped over the body, into the dim light when he grew closer, slowly turning to face the billionaire. You could hear his breath catch in his throat when he looked at you, his hands raised, stripped of any weapon, but you were too smart, knowing Tony Stark had more than a few tricks up his sleeves.
“Y/N.” His voice was steady despite the raving party in his chest, and he took a small step back as you walked towards him. It was typical for Tony to have his usual carefree and overly confident self in these simulations, but right now? Fear, that’s what was covering his face. You had assumed he was filled in on the situation, the story told by Clint and Natasha in what had transpired in that hallway back at the compound, how quickly you had turned against them. “We can help you.”
Your jaw seemed to have been clamped shut, and you were forced to a knee the moment your body tensed at the strong glitch crossing your field of vision, a mirage of colors blending together on the screen of a TV with bad reception. The walls around you changed, fading into the familiar dark-colored bricks crumbling with time, the laughter of the man without a face ringing in your ears. This gave Tony the chance, a tap of his wrist and his hand was covered in his Iron Man armor, the reactor on his palm glowing when you were suddenly thrown back into the computerized world, picking your head up to look at the playboy.
“You’re suffering, Y/N,” he stated as you climbed to your feet, shaking off the temporary feeling of pain caused by the malfunction in the simulation. “I can fix that.” His head shook as you continued to close the distance, his lips pursed together tightly, but it was too late. You were already gone, and he could see that in your cold, dead eyes.
You barely got near him when you felt the invisible pressure of what felt like an eighteen wheeler crashing into you, your body flying back a great distance. A gasp made its way out of your throat, constricted as it seemed like your ribs were caved in by the nonlethal shock wave. You should’ve expected the retaliation, yet you didn’t and it only seemed to piss you off more as you climbed to your feet. Tony made his way to you, his armored hand held up just in case you needed to be blasted once more. A growl formed in the back of your throat as you looked at him, your hands clenching into fists by your sides.
“How about you eat a Snickers, Y/N,” Tony suggested, shrugging nonchalantly. “You’re clearly hungry.”
You breathed out heavily, frustrated. You knew HYDRA wasn’t going to go easy when presented with an opportunity to make your job more difficult. Taking Tony out would be simple if he didn’t have that damn suit protecting him, even if it was only a partial. You eyed him carefully, familiar with all the ways Tony had stored his suit on him, and it seems that he just came prepared for hand to hand combat, no suit required. After all, it was just you he was after, and he was always the over achiever. Maybe he didn’t come fully prepared in the hopes to get done what the others can’t.
“Your nonlethal tactics won’t work on me, Stark,” you stated. “Either kill me, or I kill you.”
He shrugged, contemplating the idea for a moment before ultimately denying your offer with a quick shake of his head. “I choose the third option. You come in quietly without anymore deaths and we get you the help you need.”
“So be it,” you calmly stated. You sucked in a deep breath before charing towards him, knowing exactly his reaction in this scenario. You didn’t get far before he blasted you away again, but as your body slid across the floor from the impact of the shock wave, he didn’t see you getting back up.
Your body laid there, motionless. Not even the slight movement of your chest to signify that you were breathing, and he waited with bated breath, his eyes glued to you, for what seemed like forever before he finally made his way to your paralyzed form. His footsteps were hesitant, slow, and when he crouched down upon reaching you, his heart felt to be in his throat as he moved his bare hand to your neck, but it didn’t last long. The moment your eyes snapped open was the moment his heart dropped to his gut as your arm shot up, wrapping around his throat. Your enhanced limb caught his hand, crushing his suit as if you were clenching a dried leaf in your fist. You slowly climbed to your feet, forcing him down on to his knees as he stared up at you with pure terror in his dark brown eyes.
And, with the way your hand gripped his windpipe, he couldn’t make a sound as his hand succumbed to the damages your cybernetic fist was doing to his bones.
Steve, unlike Tony and Clint, had opted to go alone on his hunt. You figured he didn’t need them since he had the amplified senses a super soldier has to protect himself. You wouldn’t be able to sneak up on him, not with his boosted hearing, but it didn’t deter you to try. Attached to the shadows once again, your footsteps were quick and careful as you approached him from behind, but the way he was walking, casually, not as if he was seeking someone, you knew he was aware of your presence.
You stepped out of the shadows, making yourself seen in the light brought to you from the sun peeking through boarded windows in the hallway, Steve slowing his walk to a complete stop before turning around to face you.
The last you have physically seen of the patriot was before you had been converted to a HYDRA experiment, taken early on a mission under the premise that you were to canvas the area only for him to conduct a conversation about your happy relationship with the two redheads. That was the last thing you remember of him before waking up in a case molded to fit your body, trapping you in a nightmare you may never escape from. The ire swimming through you was stronger than you have ever felt, and you wondered if he could see that by the way he sighed.
“It’s been a while, Y/N.” The hand free of his shield rested on his hip as he watched you carefully. “Y’know, Buck… He went through the same thing you’re going through.” He couldn’t help but chuckle, a small smirk lifting a corner of his lips. Where he found the humor in the situation was beyond you. “He was brainwashed by HYDRA. They used him as their puppet, such as you. Now he’s living his best life up in Wakanda.” He took a step towards you, but you only continued to stare at him. “We can do that for you, too, if you let us. We can break you out of this hold they have on you and you can live your best life.”
Despite yourself, you couldn’t stop the eye roll from happening, a shake of your head as you, too, took a step towards him. “I was living my best life,” you confessed, a scoff escaping the back of your throat as your jaw clenched. “Now it’s changed, and I’m changing with it.” You started to close the distance, your legs gradually growing faster as he prepared himself for impact.
He got down on his knee when you were close, his shield going up just in time to stop the metal fist that would’ve blown apart his jaw, and the sound of metal against metal reverberated throughout the hallway. The vibration in the arm from the collision caused your whole body to shiver, but you ignored it as you managed to block Steve when he tried to use his shield against you. Fighting Steve would always be easier than fighting Natasha - the redhead had the agility the man lacked, capable of crawling around you like a spider. The only thing the patriot had to him was his strength, and now that you can now match that power, it was easier.
You had to wait for an opening, blocking his attacks as best you can, but he sure does know how to put that shield to good use. It wasn’t until you managed to get a good punch on his chin that you finally got the upperhand, becoming the one to throw the punches as he was forced to back up. You used the anger boiling in your body, letting it control how hard you hit as you drove your robotic fist into the shield as many times as you could. Though you knew you wouldn’t get anywhere, watching the dents form in the strong metal underneath your punches seemed to satisfy that anger you were feeling.
“Stand down, Y/N!” You could barely hear his voice over the sound, but you did hear and you didn't listen. Your efforts only became stronger at the sound of his voice, tears burning your eyes. Steve had no choice but to slowly lower to the ground the more powerful your punches became.
Steve's grip on the shield slipped, falling to the ground just as your fist connected to his jaw. You saw it, feeling yourself move in slow motion as you had just barely managed to pull back the force on the punch, but it still did a fair share of damage as he collapsed at the impact. You gripped his shirt in your fist, crumpling the fabric as you raised your arm. This would be a fatal blow, you had realized. The soldier was exhausted, all the fight in him seemingly gone, but it didn't feel as if your brawl with him lasted long.
“We don’t have to do this,” he whispered. His cerulean eyes pleaded as he looked up at you, hoping to get through, hoping to pull what the others couldn't, but you saw right through his act. “I don’t know what they did to you, Y/N, but we can help.”
You breathed out, exasperated, releasing his shirt and moving to pick up his shield. As you shook your head, you hovered over him, gripping the guard tightly in both of your hands, holding it high above your head. “It’s too late for that, Steve.”
Clint would be an easy fight since his arm was suspended by a sling, a consequence of having a bullet go through your shoulder, and you couldn’t help but wonder why HYDRA wasted their resources to send the injured Avenger to hunt you down. Maybe they were giving you a second chance to finish the job, knowing exactly what you were doing when you shot the archer. Your aim wasn’t off, the through and through in his shoulder was intentional. At the time, you didn’t want to kill him, but plans change. This simulation is bound to be coming to an end in this warehouse, it was just dependent on whether you were the one to die, or you were the one to kill.
You followed the three of them from behind, Clint leading the two agents down the hall. And, unlike the agents following Tony, these two had their guns out and poised, ready to shoot when necessary. Maybe it was on Tony’s orders, figuring he was thinking he’d succeed in tricking you. It was unfortunate that he was wrong, but at least you satisfied HYDRA for the time being.
The eagerness to get out of this make believe world resulted in your heart to beat rampantly in your chest, knowing just how close you were to finishing the task at hand. It caused you to skip the stealth, wrapping an arm around the closest agents neck and ripping the gun out of her hand. You didn’t bother hiding when the other two spun around at the sound, Clint immediately stopping the second agent from shooting by putting his uninjured arm in front of him. You couldn’t help but laugh at that, recalling just how ready Clint was to end you not too long ago.
Plans really do change.
“What are you doing, Y/N?” His voice was steady, and you couldn’t really seem to focus on anything but your own heartbeat. “This isn’t you.”
You scoffed, furrowing your eyebrows slightly as your head tilted to the side, pressing the barrel of the gun to the agent’s temple. This was a little bit of a déjà vu moment for Clint, wasn’t it? For you? Well, you’ve been here before. Multiple times. Everything was déjà vu for you. “Why does everybody keep saying that?” You shook your head, leaning forward, and you could hear the agent in your arms whimpering lowly, scared. As she should be. “In this game, this is who I am. I believe it’s time for me to accept that.”
“This isn’t what you think it is,” he expressed, stepping towards you. “HYDRA isn’t here, they’re not controlling you anymore. This game you think you’re playing? It’s real life, Y/N, and everything you do today is permanent. There are no redo's. That man you shot on the street? This” - he gestured to his shoulder - “will always be there. And it’s your doing.”
“No.” You shook your head rapidly, your grip tightening around the agent’s neck.
“Today is going to be on your conscience forever.”
“No, you’re lying. That’s what you do! You lie and lie and lie to get in my head and- and I’m not going to listen to it anymore.” Your arm seemed to have loosened, and the anger filling your mind distracted you from the agent in your arms, not feeling her reach into her pocket, not processing the click of a pocket knife.
“Y/N-”
“Shut up!” You released the agent in your arms to aim the gun at Clint, yet the woman was much braver than you had given her credit for. She didn’t hesitate to turn on you, driving the blade of her knife into your shoulder. Pain erupted through your arm, instinctively moving to shoot her instead out of revenge. The sound the gun made, it didn’t match that of a normal gun. It wasn’t loud, it was soft and high-pitched, muffled yet there was no silencer on the weapon. You eyed the gun in your hands more carefully, barely registering Clint ordering the agent next to him to run. This gun was nonlethal, you could see that by the lack of blood coming from the woman on the ground when you looked at her. But why was SHIELD suddenly being nonlethal? Tony’s pressurized shockwaves did no harm, and Steve was real quick to throw in the towel after only a few moments. And Wanda. She had multiple opportunities to kill you, yet she only ever closed that window when it opened.
Clint took advantage of your daze to move closer to you, his feet quiet and cautious. “We don’t want to hurt you,” he spoke up, pulling your attention to him. His footsteps halted where he was when you made eye contact with him, your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as the light gun in your hands suddenly became heavy. “We just want to help.”
You grunted as you pulled the knife from your arm, and it fell to the ground as your body tensed, a glitch crossing your field of vision once again. The gun did not survive the clench of your robotic hand, crumbling to pieces to the floor, yet the fault in the simulation only brought you back to realism. This is what HYDRA wanted you to believe. Let Clint get close to you under the false pretense of safety only to be stabbed in the heart by a knife he was surely hiding. No, none of them had any intentions of helping. The only thing they were programmed to do was lure you into fallacious security only to kill you seconds later.
Clint was an easy fight since his arm was suspended by a sling.
You’re not really sure what made you double back to the manager’s office, but you stumbled through the door moments later to find Wanda still laying there, unconscious. You released a heavy breath as you fell to your knees next to her, swiping away any strands of hair that was covering her face gently before moving your hand against her neck. You sighed in relief when you felt her pulse push against your fingers in a steady rhythm, instinct taking over you as you shrugged your jacket off, balling it up and delicately placing it under Wanda's head. Your eyes fluttered close with sudden exhaustion as you pulled away from her to sit down. Your arm still throbbed from the wound, and you knew that the only reason you were still in this simulation is because you haven’t fully completed the job. Not yet. You still had two targets in the area, but as you looked at one of your next victims - her closed lids could never hide what you know to be one of the most lovely pair of eyes you’ve ever seen - you couldn’t seem to get yourself to move.
Movement in the corner of your eye caused you to finally look away from Wanda, down to a piece of paper resting underneath your leg. You watched as the useless graph you saw earlier slowly changed to form words that held more meaning to you, snatching the paper into your hands quickly to read what you can before the malfunction is corrected.
The fear of hurting the ███rs seems to be becoming an issue. Having been given the chance to █████████, the asset remains hesitant in completing the job. While █████████████████, both Agents ████ and ███ff are shown to still be alive.
Asset replacement is imminent.
Replacement? Your incapability to not kill your friends comes at a cost, it looks like. You should’ve guessed that HYDRA’s patience in your disobedience can only go so far. You weren’t the only asset, knowing your partners on your excursions at the more public settings were also from SHIELD, remembering some of their faces from the last real thing you experienced.
You released the paper in your hand and climbed to your knees, desperate to search for more information. If your replacement was imminent, then you would have to start following HYDRA’s command. Although, death in the real world would be a better solution than having to endure these nightmares every day, but that left you no chance in escaping, even if the chances for that were extremely slim already. The next piece of paper you picked up, the letters on the page began moving once more, forming words that seemed to be more important to you.
Dr. ████ has reason to believe that with just enough time and patience, the asset will display ████████████. In that case, we will be able to release her and continue on with the mission at hand.
You could feel your heart stop at the word. Release. There’s a chance you could be freed from this nightmare? That you can go back to Wanda and Natasha. The real Wanda and Natasha, not the illusion that has been regulated by evil scientists. But would it be the same? How would you be able to tell the difference between reality and simulation? You couldn’t trust HYDRA, you couldn’t trust the Avengers. You couldn’t trust… them, even though the desire to trust them was strong in your heart, but your marred brain told you otherwise.
Yet, just the thought of being untethered to these simulations was enough to get your stomach churning. And, though the objective has been redacted, you knew what you had to do to achieve freedom, but as you tore your eyes away from the paper in your hand to look at her, you still couldn't find it in yourself to move from your position on the ground. She was peaceful, content. Her eyes were being deceitful, her smile wasn't crooked, her words were laced with dishonesty. Her chest raised up slowly, down even slower, and you knew you could stay in this spot all day.
You had to move. You had to finish the job, it was one step closer to amnesty. One step closer to feeling something real. You knew that, once you were free, you couldn't go back. As much as your heart desires it, your mind holds the inadequacy to trust anybody.
As you climbed to your feet, you glanced down at the paper in your hand one last time, and felt yourself freeze as the words on the page changed once again. You breathed out, watching the letters swim around, blurring together, before finally settling.
The final result made your blood run cold.
Her footsteps reached your ears before her presence reached your eyes, picking your head up as the paper in your hands floated to the ground. She stood in the doorway, her eyes glued to Wanda's unconscious form. Blood had appeared on the witch's face, though you were uncertain where it came from. You could hear her heartbeat falter as she stumbled into the room, a gasp constricting her throat as she fell to her knees. Her hands flew to her neck, and the relief that eased her shoulders upon feeling the pulse was obvious to you.
It wasn't rare for Natasha to show this kind of love to Wanda - there have been circumstances before where you had almost achieved HYDRA's goal, causing the vigilant assassin to rush to the injured witch without hesitation, and the tenderness in her eyes would dissolve into sheer anger when she looked at you. You had expected it. When Natasha's head turned towards you, you braced yourself for the wrath. But when the softness in her eyes didn't fade, a thin layer of tears making the emeralds shine, you felt yourself fall into the pits of confusion. Was she not angry? Wanda was hurt - possibly even bleeding, you were still unsure about that - but instead of being peeved about it, Natasha looked at you with… forgiveness.
Another trick, you've decided. Why wouldn't the redhead be angry at you for hurting Wanda? How protective she was of the witch. It has always made you jealous to see such love in the simulations between the two women, seeking that kind of affection. How was it fair for them to hold the same intimacy for each other as they did in real life?
You took a step back when she got to her feet, feeling your foot bump into something on the ground. You didn't need to look at what it was, knowing it was the gun Wanda had dropped earlier.
The longer you looked into her virescent eyes, the more you felt yourself succumbing to the same hesitation that was mentioned on the papers. You couldn't shake off the feeling of adoration no matter how hard you tried to convince yourself. Your heart was winning this battle, it seems. Even if freedom was on the line.
Neither of you said anything, silence settling in the entire warehouse. You were waiting for her to make the first move - was she going to kill you? - just as much as she was waiting for you.
"I don't want to play anymore," you found yourself whispering, and the way Natasha's eyes softened at your words tugged at your heart. You leaned down, scooping the gun into your hand and taking a step towards her. "Please." You held the weapon out to her, but she only stared at you, not even bothering to give the firearm a glance. "I'm tired."
She refused the gun, her eyes watching you carefully as her head shook subtly, such a minute movement. You had to really focus in order to notice it. “I’m not going to hurt you, Y/N,” she expressed softly, tenderly. This was the affection you had always seeked in these games you’re forced to play, but did it really mean anything if it was all fake? Forged in a dark room by scientists that worked for HYDRA, the sentimental endearment shouldn’t mean anything to you, it was all worthless when it comes down to it, but why did it make you feel whole?
“Please,” you tried once more to appease to who Natasha truly was at the hand of the evil organization, programmed to do what the real Natasha would never be capable of doing. Because, if she didn’t take the gun and kill you, you’d use it to kill her. There was only one way out of this simulation, you had no choice. “Shoot me.”
At least HYDRA got one thing right when mapping out this Natasha lookalike - she’s still as stubborn as all hell. Her refusal to do what you’re begging of her was starting to get irritating. Why were they making her so obstinate? It only made it more difficult to get what you wanted.
“Shoot me!” Her flinch at the loudness in your voice was suddenly, you overlooked it. You knew you could be as loud as you want; there was nobody to hear you, nobody left to lead here to save her. Almost everybody that had stepped foot into this building was gone, no longer a concern. You were so close to finishing the job, so close to pleasing HYDRA, and now, when faced with the ultimate challenge that held eyes that made emeralds jealous, red hair that ignited memories in your mutilated mind, and lips that you wanted to feel so badly, you couldn’t be the one who brought this simulation to a close. “Just shoot me!” Maybe you were wrong. Maybe - as the gun twirled in your artificial hand to face the redheaded beauty - you could be the one. “Or I shoot you.”
Yet, the spy stood her ground. Her jaw locked, her arms crossed taut over her chest, her eyes rock solid as she looked at you from behind the barrel of the weapon, she didn’t waver. She knew, just as much as you did, that your empty threats were just that; empty. And your laughter was solemn when your arm lowered.
“That little voice saying there’s still hope?” You tapped the barrel of the gun against your temple, scoffing as a somber smile stretched your features. “It’s lying.”
Her chin lifted slightly at your words, swallowing harshly as she eyed you. “I’m not going to hurt you.” And then she sighed, her tongue flicking out to lick her lips as she took a small step towards you. “I know you’re not going to hurt me. I mean, look what you did to Wanda.” She gestured to the unconscious witch behind her, your sweatshirt used as a pillow to support her head, yet the blood on her face still remained. How did it get there? “Deep down, Y/N, you still care about me just as much as we care about you.”
“Stop.” Your nose burned as your head shook, looking down and pressing your hands against your temples once more in a sense of déjà vu. You huffed, your heart banging against your ribcage. “Stop, stop, stop.”
“You either kill me,” she continued, blatantly ignoring your command, “or you put the gun down and we leave. Together.” Another quiet step towards you. There was a part of you that wanted to believe her, a part of you that wanted to take her up on her offer. To leave, to walk away. But you couldn’t. “Put the gun down, Y/N.”
Pain. That familiar feeling, like electricity pulsing through your bones, triggered by the glitch obscuring your vision for a brief moment. The walls around you dissolved, and your breathing trembled greatly with anxiety as you found it difficult to move. Trapped in your body cell once again, the familiar dark room of crumbling bricks and dull lights. Your eyes widened, and you tried to beg them for release, but the mask clamping your jaw shut made it difficult for anybody in the room to hear you. Your heart became desperate now, panic and dread causing it to become to your ribcage what a jackhammer becomes to cement. You wanted out, but your screams only died against the metal covering your mouth. Your squeezed your eyes shut tightly to hide the tears forming. And, though you knew it was no use, your body convulsed in a hopeless attempt to break free.
“No!” You could hear your voice now, but with your eyes squeezed shut, you didn’t fully process that you were back in the manager’s office. “Let me out! Let me out! Let me out!” Your cries tore against your throat, pure fear igniting the fight or flight response in your mind. “I don’t want to be here anymore! Please!”
“Y/N!”
“Stop it, stop it, stop it!” Your hands clawed at your head, tears escaping your closed eyes to crawl down your cheeks.
You felt fingers catch your wrists, preventing you from doing further damage to yourself. Your eyes flew open, bloodshot with tears as you met the soft eyes of Natasha in front of you. She sent you a smile, but it didn’t last long before you ripped your hand free to wrap around her neck. Another malfunction, it reminded you just how powerful HYDRA is. Freedom was on the line now.
You pinned her against the wall, her hands gripping your wrist as the tips of her toes barely scraped the floor. The softness in her eyes was quickly replaced with fear, and you knew exactly how she was feeling at this moment because you, too, were scared.
You couldn’t help but furrow your eyebrows when you felt the warm wetness coloring Natasha’s neck, tearing your eyes away from hers to look down. You could see the bright liquid in between your fingers, staining her neck a red color. Blood. But where did it come from? You weren’t holding anything sharp, and there was no blood on the assassin five seconds ago.
You found yourself releasing her, listening to her fall to the ground and catch her breath as you took a closer look at your shaking hand, eyebrows furrowed with confusion. You followed the red trail up your arm, eyeing the bleeding wound in your shoulder. Of all the things HYDRA has done to you, seeing your own blood was not one of them. Your breath hitched in your throat as you staggered backwards, moving your prosthetic fingers to touch the injury, and the pain you felt upon contact pulled a hiss out of you.
“This is real?” You looked at Natasha, wide eyes as she climbed to her feet. “‘Tash?” You felt a sudden wave of dizziness, swaying back and forth as the edges of your vision darkened. You fell to your knees, and the redhead was quick to join you. Her hands cupped your face, keeping your head straight so you could look into her eyes.
“It’s okay, milyy,” she said quietly, and you smiled weakly at the genuine affection, “I’m here.”
“I’m sorry,” you whispered, shaking your head. “I- I… killed them.”
It was becoming more difficult to keep your eyes open, but that didn’t seem to matter anymore. As darkness surrounded you, you could hear a high-pitched noise, soon followed by a jolt of electricity flowing through you.
And, as you slipped out of Natasha’s grip, the words on the last paper circled in your mind.
Don’t trust yourself.
#wanda maximoff#natasha romanoff#wandanat#marvel#marvel cinematic universe#mcu#natasha romanoff x reader#black widow#natasha x reader#romanoff x reader#black widow x reader#wanda maximoff x reader#scarlet witch#wanda x reader#scarlet witch x reader#maximoff x reader#wandanat x reader#natasha romanoff x wanda maximoff#natasha x wanda#romanoff x maximoff#black widow x scarlet witch#steve rogers#captain america#tony stark#iron man#bruce banner#the hulk#hulk#clint barton#hawkeye
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“ Welcome to my blog, enjoy your stay ! “
Art Requests ; Open
Art Examples
Rules for Requesting ;
~ At the moment, I only take requests for Twisted Wonderland
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~ I will draw gore and blood, but like I kinda suck at doing that so be warned. Also I’m bad a drawing guts so if you ask for that it may be done poorly
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~ My favorite characters are Jamil, Azul, and Sebek. Any requests with them in it I will love and they will be done quicker, also I’ll love you forever
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#salt-characters - Used for my oc’s (except Oriens and Sol) others can use if you ever draw any of my oc’s! (including Oriens and Sol)
#salt-aesthetic - Used whenever I post about my aesthetic
#Oriens Inkp - My main twst oc who gets his own tag because of favoritism
#Sol Irbiter - A newer twst oc who gets his own tag because of favoritism
#salt-other - Anything that doesn’t fit with any of those tags
I don’t really use these very often but hey they’re here!
#request rules#twst wonderland#twst#twisted wonderland#ace trappola#deuce spade#trey clover#cater diamond#riddle rosehearts#leona kingscholar#ruggie bucchi#jack howl#azul ashengrotto#jade leech#floyd leech#jamil viper#kalim al asim#vil schoenheit#rook hunt#epel felmier#idia shroud#ortho shroud#malleus draconia#silver twst#sebek zigvolt#lilia vanrouge#other characters
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