ok another floating thought:
Jason Todd does not tolerate bad eating habits.
Iced coffee for breakfast? Absolutely not.
6pm and you had not a single sip of water? Forget it.
Having a single slice of toast for lunch AND dinner? Naur babes.
You will be eating 3 square meals a day will allowance for snacks and 'happy foods' as he likes to call them.
As soon as you complain about a headache, stomachache, light-headedness, fatigue he will tell you to go fucking eat something with a glass of water, not coffee.
Its even worse if you live together like i strongly believe he would wake up early just to make you a balanced breakfast before you go about your day.
GOD BUT IF UR IN UNI??? babe be ready bc he will break into your dorm to bring u food that he cooked u himself. (he's a loverboy duh)
no time to cook or order? He's gotchu
too tired? already on the way
exam season with barely any time to take a breath? already on it babe he'll spoonfeed you while you revise your textbook
and plus, how else are you supposed to grow as big and strong as him when you're only eating half a meal a day?
I WANNA MUNCH ON HIS MOOSCLES SO BAD FUCKKKKK
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AU for Bats and the JL
When Duke joins the brigade, the Bats are ecstatic to introduce him to the JL. Why? None of the JL actually believe that the Bats are non-meta humans. Are they supposed to believe that Batman can do all that he can because he trains really hard?
The JL is so convinced that the Bats are lying about not having powers that they've included it in New Member initiation. It's considered "rude" and "mean" to call out Bats on their very obvious power usage. In fact, guessing Bat powers is half the fun! They gather all of the non-Bat members to have potluck discussions about it.
Obviously, the Bats are well aware of these meetings. They have their own gatherings where they laugh at the suggestions or come up with strategies to fuck with the JL.
For Bruce, the JL is convinced that the man has control over shadows as well as increased mental compacities. Bruce is way too skilled in disappearing in a room full of people with enhanced senses. Also, he knows facts about almost every subject.
For Dick, that man should not be able to move like he does. He either doesn't have bones or has increased elasticity. Dick's favorite JL memory is crawling down the Watchtower halls with his joints in weird places. Green Arrow's scream is forever recorded and backed up into five different servers.
At first, the JL thought Jason had emotional manipulation capabilities. The hope, courage, and passion he inspired could not have been naturally occurring. Then, after he re-emerged as the Red Hood, obviously his powers are resurrection -_-
Tim? Kid's a cryptic ancient creature. The creepy kid will stare at you without blinking throughout a two hour meeting. Stay away from him and don't piss him off.
Steph nearly laughed herself into a coma when someone tried to convince Hal that Spoiler gets her power from the color purple. Her switching to Robin's costume caused a riot and the JL members frantically scheduled an emergency non-Bat meeting. Should they intervene with Bruce forcing her to wear a costume without aid to her powers? The few months she was Robin were tense for the members.
Damian has an ability to understand martial arts on an unparalleled level. What other non-meta ten year old can utilize a sword so effectively?
Cass is an entity. They don't know what she is, but they fear her all the same.
Barbara is all-knowing. Her ability to collect information and navigate technology can not be naturally occurring.
Now, the JL is faced with the first Bat to admit he has powers. Does that mean none of the others have powers? Is Signal's just too obvious to deny?
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I know the fandom is very attached to the "Jason reads classic literature" and I'm not saying throw that away but I am saying: have him watch Bungo Stray Dogs.
Please I'm begging y'all to consider
Have him read Osamu Dazai's works and maybe cry (or y'know go to the gym, he seems like a why feel things when I can train kinda guy) because fuck that man can write apathy and then he's hanging out w/ Tim in an effort to try and get to know the kid and Tim puts on this show, fuck it's an anime- but hey he's trying here so he'll watch the damn anime. And then I want him to slowly lose his shit as more authors are introduced and he can't figure out how he feels about it but Tim's entertained so he supposes it was a good night.
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