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chimielie · 3 months

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oh my god, they were roommates

part 2 to and they were roommates. no cws, just silliness.

you're not talking to tooru.

he's not sure how you manage it so effectively. you eat all your meals in your room while he's home, except for when you manage to sneak from there to the door while he's in the bathroom. his only clue that you've gone out is that you leave your bedroom door open when you do, really hammering home how empty his life suddenly is.

"even when we're in the same room," he sighs, resting his cheek on his fist. "it's like trying to grab a fish out of the water. i turn around or blink and poof! gone!"

"your sleeve is dipping into your drink," says his date. "and i really think you need to discuss this with your roommate. at home. alone."

tooru waves goodbye forlornly as they stand up and walks out of the restaurant, leaving behind a half-eaten ball of rice and a broken man.

"you are like a sad, sad," akaashi says, pausing to really linger on the word sad, "wet cat. please stop bringing your dates here to mope about—to them. you are forming bad associations between our business and your terrible romantic etiquette."

akaashi keiji is a mangaka now, or an editor for one, anyway; he works at onigiri miya (tokyo location) on the side because it's the only way he routinely leaves the house; tooru brings his dating drama here to brighten up what must surely be a terribly boring life.

"what would you do without me, akaashi-kun," tooru stretches his arms high with a languid sigh that makes akaashi worry that he has comprehended none of his words. "wouldn't you be so miserable if you didn't have me to bring romance and excitement to your life?"

"i have a boyfriend of several years," akaashi says, which is rude to remind tooru of while he's in such a vulnerable state. "i have plenty of excitement with him in my life."

"inconsiderate!" tooru snorts. "please break up with him to show me solidarity."

"i will not be doing that." akaashi picks up the nameless and now-vanished date's plate and takes a bite out of the leftover food.

"understandable," tooru nods, "that's very reasonable. i just don't know what to do, or how to fix it, or what i did wrong."

"you come in here every other night to whine about what you did wrong."

"do not."

"do too," akaashi sticks out his tongue at him. there's a grain of rice stuck to his lip. "you spent several months going out on dates trying to make your friend-turned roommate jealous—during which, I'll note, you basically exclusively talked about the person you were and continue to be obsessed with—then initiated... romantic physical contact, then ran away. because you have the attachment style of a stray cat."

"ah, akaashi-kun," tooru says. "are you saying i get around?"

"i am saying you are lurking outside the window and begging for attention and then biting the hand that feeds you when you get it.”

“oh.” tooru is quiet for a moment. “can i get the check?”

“it’s on the house if you’ll just go home and talk to your roommate and never come back here with another date.” akaashi says, finishing off the onigiri.

“deal.”

your room is empty, your bedroom door ajar when he comes home. mournfully, tooru sits on the bed, reminiscing over the hours he'd spent gossiping with you here.

he'll just wait for you to get back. when he used to take you dancing—with your other friends, but you'd wind your arms around his neck and he'd run light hands over your waist, your hips, and you would look at him like no one else even existed—you always wanted to leave before midnight. it's ten-forty-nine now, according to his watch, so he's sure you'll be back before long.

you get home at two-oh-four. you had never seen the point in staying out longer when going home and chatting over a bowl of cheesy noodles with tooru was so much more appealing—you didn't want to dance with anyone else anyway. now, though, you don't want to be home, and you have something to prove. to who, you're not sure, but you find yourself staying out later and later.

even though you always return home alone. you'd thought about really upping the ante, about moving on as abruptly as possible, but you couldn't. it felt like going too far in this petty revenge game. after all, you still—

you stop short, dropping your shoes on the floor. the devil is in your bed, lying on his side, knees tucked to his chest to fit his absurdly long frame. his breaths are even and deep, his face peaceful.

"oh, tooru," you sigh, and climb over him to tuck yourself against his warm side.

you blink your eyes open slowly, sleep still gleaming in the corners of your vision. there's a weight on your hip and something that smells really, really good surrounding you, nearly lulling you back to sleep.

"oh, please don't," says a voice you haven't heard in days. "my arm's circulation has been completely cut off. i may never serve again."

you jolt away from the soft source of warmth, which you realize belatedly is oikawa's chest.

"what happened?" you say, swiping at your face with the back of your hand.

he looks frustratingly perfect as always, brown hair rumpled, eyes soft like you aren't in the biggest spat of your friendship.

"i was waiting for you," he admits, leaning on his side and casting his eyes down, his lashes shadowing his high cheekbones. "because i wanted to apologize, to be clear. i must have fallen asleep, and then i woke up, and it was like—"

"yes," you cough. "i see. um."

"i'm sorry," he says. "hey, look at me. i'm really sorry."

"for what, oikawa?" you laugh nervously.

"for being stupid," he rolls one shoulder in a shrugging motion. "for trying to make you jealous and instead just being, like, a complete fucking clown during all of it."

"make me jealous?" you say, blinking at him.

"please don't look at me like that," he says, scrubbing over his face with the hand that's not propping up his head. "it-you make me nervous."

"we've been friends for years," you say, still apparently lost. "how can i make you nervous?"

"you always will," he laughs, but it's strained. "look—i like you. probably more, but i'm trying not to scare you—any more than i already have, i mean. i'm not sorry for kissing you, is what i mean. i should just—i should probably go."

"wait," you say firmly before he can untangle himself from your sheets. putting a hand on his shoulder and pushing yourself up to meet his lips, which are soft and dry and parted slightly with surprise.

the kiss is warm and lingers, even after you pull away. tooru stares at you with dazed eyes that make you shy, dropping your own. his voice is quiet but hopeful, contrasting his words in tone when he speaks.

"what the fuck?"

#haikyuu!! x reader #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #hq!! x reader #oikawa x reader angst #oikawa angst #oikawa fluff #oikawa tooru x reader #oikawa toru x reader #oikawa x reader #oikawa x reader fluff #oikawa tōru x reader

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touyazbbygirl · 1 month

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you take the man out of the-

Warning! Bittersweet, angsty but fluff. this was written at the time of posting so 3am. Its not proof read nor super amazing I was half asleep. so bad writing has its own warning <3

And when Im back in Miyagi.. I feel it. Tooru had left for Argentina not long after high school, breaking contact with the one he had loved. He wanted you to come with, but you had things you needed to accomplish first. Finishing school, you had friends and family in Miyagi. You couldnt just leave that behind like he wanted to. Like he could.

When Tooru had returned to Miyagi for a visit, he saw you. You seemed happy. Lively. The winter air made your cheeks flushed, the heat from your breath creating small clouds as you spoke so kindly to the elderly lady you were helping. He couldnt help it. His feet moved faster than he could listen to his brain telling him to stop. The moonlight and the signs reflection creating colors against your skin. Pants fell from his lips, the air cooled his nerves, enough. He stood there, looking at you with pleading eyes, begging you not to run off, not to tell him to leave you alone. Begging you to stay, just for a moment. He loved you, he hated being away from you. He hated being in Argentina without you. “Y/n..” Tooru started as he felt his breath hitch in his throat. Seeing your expression. He knew, knew you felt the same as he did. Knew that the longing feeling of each other was so deeply embedded in your veins. “Ya know, ive been waiting for a long time for you shittykawa” You spoke with a watery tone, eyes matching as they filled with tears. Just being able to see him, just to be able to hear his voice caused everything around you to stand still. To stop, to just be him. In this moment, not a single thing else mattered. Reaching out to reach for him, grasping his hand in his. “I love you.” the three words rolled off your tongue just as pretty as they used too. “Im sick of waiting. You better be here to take me with you” Tooru felt his heart stop, the genuine smile tugging at the corners of his chapped lips. He did the only logical thing in that moment as the snow started falling, as delicate as the heart he held in his hands. He stepped closer, cupping your cheeks that warmed his icy fingertips, thumbs caressing the apples that became more prominent as you returned the smile he was giving. Tooru rested his forehead against yours as he let out a sigh of relief. His heart felt like it was going to jump out of his chest. He leaned down pressing a kiss against your lips, feeling the lip balm against his own. “I missed you” He whispered after he broke the kiss. “So much. Im not leaving without you. I dont care what id have to do. Im not.. Im not going home without you.” Tooru could careless about his pride. It seemed meaningless. Having you standing in from of him. His stupid senseless pride meant nothing to him. He would get on his knees and begged if it meant you would go with him. You were home, his home. It had nothing to do with Miyagi.. You were the city lights. You were the moon tonight. You were the stars in the sky. You were cherry blossoms in early spring. You were all he ever needed. You were everything. Nothing else mattered to him. Not volleyball, hell not even his milk bread could compare to you. He was glad he went home, just to visit family. He got his world back, and that was the one thing he was missing back in Argentina.

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tooruslove · 2 years

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𝐎𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐀 𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐀𝐋𝐖𝐀𝐘𝐒 𝐀 𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐑

you always believed that the worst feeling someone could experience, was betrayal.

so when you entered the party just to see your boyfriends hands wrapped around another girls waist and both their lips interlocked with each other, sloppily kissing, time stopped for you.

you felt dizzy. a familiar yet sickening feeling began to make itself at home in your stomach and your breathing became more erratic. the feeling of dread and nausea overtook you.

and the moment his eyes inevitably met your teary ones, time stopped for him too.

you couldn't help but wonder how long it would take for you to forgive him; how long you would be able to resist running back to him. just like last time you caught him.

— OIKAWA. kaminari. kuroo. TERUSHIMA. eren.

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sky-casino · 1 year

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oikawa x y/n: growing pains

loving him. losing yourself in loving him. drifting apart. getting back together? word count: 4,400+

you and oikawa became best friends in middle school

then it was during your first year of high school when you got romantically entangled

after graduating from seijoh, you went to college while oikawa worked a full-time job at a cafe so he can save up for his trip to brazil and argentina.

you knew that he was already decided on becoming a pro volleyball player. you were certain that nothing and no one could get in his way, and you were 100% supportive of him as long as he takes care of his health and doesn't overexert himself.

with this, you also knew that if you wanted to continue being with him, you would eventually need to leave your life in japan behind to move to argentina with oikawa. but you didn't mind. he's the one, after all.

once he could afford to travel and stay in argentina as a pro trainee, you two had a long-distance relationship. it was difficult but manageable and worth it. you, a university student. him, an aspiring pro player for the argentina volleyball team.

fast forward to some years later and after much hardwork, oikawa was finally and officially named as a member of the argentina volleyball team. everything's ready: the contract, citizenship, his position, his jersey, his apartment and dorm room, the works.

he excitedly video-called you when it was tuesday 4am for you and it was monday 4pm for him. you're completely used to these wee-hours-of-the-morning calls by now.

you were extremely ecstatic for him because through the many years of knowing oikawa, it has been ingrained in you how much blood, sweat, and tears he has expended to reach this dream. sometimes, you contemplate how physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted he must be, and you just cry. oikawa wasn't aware of this as you didn't want him to worry.

he indirectly reminded you that with his official admission to the team, you'll now have to move to argentina as well, which you both originally planned, "i'm so excited to see you, babe! finally, we won't have to deal with this long-distance anymore."

you chuckled and reciprocated his excitement, making a mental note of how you'll explain to your boss that you'd have to leave the company.

he was sad to cut the video call short, but he wanted to give you more time to sleep, "bye, baby. i love you! i'll call you again tomorrow to share more deets!"

two months after that video call, oikawa was waiting for you at the airport and just like in the movies, you ran to each other and he picked you up in an embrace as the two of you twirled around. it's been too long since you last saw each other.

oikawa helped you settle in by touring you around, introducing you to his coach and teammates, and teaching you some argentinian language when you guys have free time.

your daily life consists of oikawa waking up early to go to work and you sleeping in for a bit. oikawa never fails to cook breakfast for you, always leaving a sweet note beside the plate.

you've been relentlessly seaching online for a job in argentina since oikawa informed you of his admission to the team. you wanted to secure a job in the foreign country even before arriving there. unfortunately, you still have no luck in finding a suitable job because you couldn't speak their language. oikawa knows that this has been troubling you, and he comforts you and says that it's probably high time for you to take a break from working as you've been burnt out from your most recent job as an art curator.

you realized that he was right as you enjoyed sleeping in and just bumming around in your shared apartment. you took this generous amount of free time as an opportunity to finish all the books in your pile, try out new recipes that you cooked for oikawa, and binge all the shows in your Netflix's My List section.

after almost two months of this relaxed lifestyle, you started getting restless and bored. and so you tried looking for a job again and you stumbled upon an opening for a work-from-home data encoder position. the pay is much less than the one you previously had, but honestly, this is the best (and only) position you are qualified for right now. so, you sent your resume and after a couple of interviews and exams, you got the job. to celebrate, you and oikawa had a romantic candle-lit dinner at home where both of you cooked.

oikawa has been busy lately, so spending this special night with him plus finally getting a job really lifted your spirits. however, beneath all that, a small part of you was still uneasy. you knew that given your skills, experience, and previous position, you deserve a better and more fulfilling job. but you ignored this thought and didn't tell oikawa about it as you didn't want to ruin the night.

you've been working as a data encoder for a year now. you quickly learned the ropes and eventually found the work no longer challenging. it also infuriates you that there has been no salary increase in that one year. the thought that you deserve a more relevant and fulfilling job is creeping back into your mind, or maybe it never left and is just making its presence stronger now. thus, you never stopped looking for a job that's more in line with your background as an art curator. but you couldn't find one where you qualify because all the job vacancies require the applicant to be an argentinian graduate. though this frustrates you, you know it makes sense because homegrown argentinian citizens would be better art curators as they know and understand their local art far better than you, a foreigner, ever could. in terms of the language, you've been struggling learning it as well and eventually lost the will to continue studying it. basically, career-wise, nothing's going great for you.

you also miss your family and friends terribly. so that night, as you and oikawa were cuddling in bed, you suggested for the both of you to go back home to Japan to spend time with your loved ones. in response, he caressed your face and said that he understood your feelings and that he felt the same. however, he gently reminded you that he is still considered as a new starting member, which means he needs to spend at least two years playing in that position consistently before he could visit home. he embraced you tightly when he said that currently, you still have to wait for ten months. you were frustrated to hear this, but you didn't want to argue or add to oikawa's stress since it's something that the both of you can't do anything about. so you just told yourself that the ten months will fly by before you know it. visiting home by yourself was out of the picture as well because it just didn't feel right to do that.

nine months have passed since then and after oikawa got home one night, you giddily reminded him that the ten months that you're both waiting for will end next month and you can finally visit home.

your smile slowly got erased from your face when you heard oikawa say, "yeah, about that..."

you nervously asked him what's wrong, and he explained that the coach just announced that morning that the next three months will be busy for his team as they will go overseas for training camps. their first stop is brazil, then they'll move straight to europe, specifically italy and poland.

then you asked, "how about our plan to visit home next month?"

"i'm so sorry babe, i.. i really am. we just have to wait for three months, then we can finally fly home. i promise."

after that, his apologetic tone switched to an amusing one as he chuckled, mentioning how he's excited to face hinata, kageyama, and ushijima again.

that chuckle annoyed you even more. it was the last straw. and something inside you finally snapped. as tears relentlessly fell across your face, you suddenly blurted out all your frustrations and fears.

you mentioned how much you miss your family and friends and how unhappy you are with your current job and with the fact that you can't find work that you actually like. you told oikawa how exhausted you are mentally and emotionally, and that ultimately, you've been feeling burnt out and depressed. you felt like you're in the wrong place. you also shared that you've been contemplating about your own future lately, and you started to feel scared thinking about getting stuck in your current job and you realized that you can't live in a country where you only had two options: settle with an unfulfilling job or later on be a housewife. both were distasteful to you.

oikawa watched and listened to you with wide eyes, unable to move. after you said everything and continued to sob on the floor, he panicked and quickly placed his water down on the table before running to you.

"baby, i'm so sorry. i'm so sorry... i didn't know that you've been feeling this way. what do you want me to do? i'll do anything to help. i'll take care of y-"

"i'm done, oikawa. i... i need to go home, where my family and friends are, where i can grow professionally and personally. argentina just isn't for me. i feel empty in this place. i thought i was going to be happy because i'd be with you. but i'm sorry, it turns out that being with you isn't... enough." you said in between sobs.

it's the most difficult thing you ever had to say and you felt a pang of regret. you wish you didn't say it, you wish you could turn back time and avoid this entire conversation. but you're done adjusting, done being always the understanding one between the two of you, done putting oikawa before yourself. you had to do this.

seeing the pain in oikawa's eyes as he slowly realized that you're breaking up with him pierced your heart. it was a searing sensation. it's now oikawa's turn to sob as he begged you not to leave, embracing your midriff tightly. you had no energy left to talk, so instead you caressed his head ever so slowly and lovingly. then you thought that perhaps this is the last time you get to do that.

you told him that you're both tired and you're going to sleep already, he can follow if he wants. later on, you were in bed spacing out as oikawa took a shower. he tried to muffle his cries but you could still faintly hear it. you slept facing away from him and as soon as he joined you in bed, he slowly wrapped his arms around you and snuggled his face into your neck, basking in your warmth and scent.

the next morning, you woke up without oikawa beside you. you were so out of it that you questioned whether last night's fight was a nightmare or real. unfortunately, it's the latter.

you slowly got up, feeling extremely lethargic. but that feeling left your body for a second when you were surprised to see oikawa cooking in the kitchen, you thought he went to work as usual.

he hesitated to talk to you, but he managed. "g-good morning... babe. i just finished making breakfast. let's eat! i'm not going to work today. i... i want to discuss and fix this... with you."

you took longer than usual to respond because you couldn't help but notice his puffy red eyes and the fact that his face is full of pain but he's still trying his best to smile. when you finally processed what he just said, you realized that he hasn't accepted your decision, he's still not letting you go.

"tooru... i've made up my mind." you said, struggling not to let your voice tremble. "please, just let me go. i need to leave."

and just like a broken dam giving in to water pressure, he quickly burst into tears as he sat down abruptly. he shook his head vehemently, covering his face with his hands, finding it hard to accept what he's hearing.

you walked briskly to him and knelt in front of him as you held and caressed the sides of his head, "tooru, don't worry. we can still be best friends-"

"i want to be more than that! i am more than that!" he yelled as he freed his red face from his hands. "i love you so much. i can't live without you, y/n. you know that!"

"no, tooru. you can, you definitely can live without me. you're doing so well! you've achieved your dream and you're happy here. after working so hard since we're young, you're finally in the right place, in the right team."

"it's because i have you. i was able to endure everything because i have you!"

"you're in the right place, tooru. you belong here. i don't. and if there's anything you know about me, it's that i don't want to hold you back from doing what you love. i would never forgive myself if i became the reason why you can't do well or why you can't do great things. that's the worst for me. i want to see you soar and reach greater heights. okay?"

oikawa couldn't say anything as he sobbed.

"if you love me, tooru... and you want me to be happy, you're going to let me go. i also want to do great things. i also have my own goals that i want to achieve. and i'm so sorry, but i can't do that here." you finally lost composure as you let the tears fall.

you and oikawa embraced each other in a long tight hug as you cried. it was the good cry that both of you needed.

you slowly freed yourself from the hug after half an hour. oikawa gently held you in place before you could completely go away. you looked at him and you saw his faint and painful smile as he studied and caressed every inch of your face. "sorry, i just want to look at and feel your face one last time.", he said as a tear fell.

you did the same, you gently ran your fingertips on his pretty face, the face that you've adored since you were 12 years old.

after touching each other's face, you kissed passionately for the last time and you spent the rest of the day just enjoying each other's company, mostly in silence. both of you didn't bring up the topic of when exactly you will be leaving. oikawa was afraid to ask, and you knew that so you didn't tell him the date yet. it could wait.

that night, you reminded him that he should go back to work the next day as it's not good to be absent for long, and he reluctantly agreed. what he didn't know is that the main reason you reminded him was because you didn't want him to see you as you pack your belongings, as it would just add more to the pain.

the next night, oikawa came home to see your luggage. you explained that your flight is scheduled the following night and while he was devastated that it's so soon, he just nodded his head. you apologized for the rush but he smiled sadly and said that he understands.

you were guilty for scheduling the flight so soon, but you knew that staying any longer and delaying your departure would just make it harder for you both to let go.

the next evening, you were about to board the plane with oikawa seeing you off.

"if... if ever you changed your mind and you want to come back to me, i'm just here, okay? i'm just a text or call away. i love you so much, y/n." he said shakily, trying not to cry in public.

you embraced him tightly, "take care of yourself, tooru. i hope you can visit home as soon as possible, they all miss you back there."

after that, you two parted ways. as oikawa watched you leave, his heart welled up with regrets and what-ifs.

"But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss, I knew you'd haunt all my what-ifs."

after terribly missing your family and friends, you've been spending more time with them. desperate to make up for lost time, you even started living with your parents again.

both family and friends were devastated to learn about your breakup with oikawa. their suggestions for your what you should do next were divided: half of them wanted you to find someone new so you could forget him as soon as possible, while the other half wanted you to take a break from love to heal. you agreed with the latter. it's still too painful to go out and start seeing someone new.

eventually, it's been a year since you got back from argentina and you found yourself happy and in a better state than the year before. your previous company had welcomed you back upon your return and now, you just got promoted.

in terms of your romantic life, you've been on a couple of dates with guys who were either referred to you by a friend or someone you met at work, but there was no spark. there was no second date for any of those men.

it was a winter night after work, nearing christmas, when you found him outside your family house's gate.

you couldn't believe it, honestly. you and oikawa remained in contact this past year, but only through seldom chats. you couldn't even do video calls because you both knew it was going to be very awkward. so finding him now standing near your gate as the snow fell was truly surprising.

"tooru?"

he almost snapped his neck as he looked at you, wide eyes and a smile.

"what are you doing out here? it's cold! you're gonna get sick. let's go inside." you hurried to the gate with the key in your hand.

"no, i'm fine here! besides, i'm scared of your parents. they're mad at me for what happened. you got hurt because of me, remember?" he said with a sad smile.

"what? they're not mad at you! they're sad about what happened, but they don't blame you. don't worry about that."

you were happy to see the relieved look on his face. you didn't know that he had such thought weighing on him.

"thank, god. but really, i'd like to talk to you here outside. let's go to the nearby park, if that's alright?"

his tone and facial expression told you that he's uneasy, so you obliged. "sure. it's so great to see you again, tooru. what's up? "

"it's lovely to see you again too, y/n. it honestly feels a bit surreal because i haven't been back here in a long time. it's my first time to come home since i became a starter in the argentinian team."

"what? you didn't come home after your overseas training camps last year?"

"nope. instead, i bought tickets for my family so they can visit me and see argentina. then a few months after my family left, iwa-chan, makki, and matsukawa surprised me with their own visit. it was funny, they literally suddenly showed up at my door one early morning. i was still in my pajamas when i opened the door. " oikawa said, both of you laughing.

"wow, that's very in-character for them." you chuckled.

"i know right."

after a short pause and awkward silence, oikawa continued in a more somber tone, "i... i wanted to chat you everyday, you know? i felt so bad being unable to keep in touch with you regularly."

"there's no reason to feel bad, tooru. it's oka-"

"i wanted to talk to you everyday, but i was scared that you'd think i'm annoying and clingy. so i gave you space and time... so you can heal. but i don't know," he shrugged, "i felt so uneasy, maybe because i missed you so much but for the first time ever, i couldn't do anything about it."

you saw how distraught he was so you comforted him right away, "first, i wouldn't think you're annoying for messaging me. when we broke up, didn't i say that we'd still be best friends? second, don't worry. starting from now on, we will message and call each other more regularly. overall, we will just do better in keeping in touch. okay?"

"okay... that'd be great, y/n."

oikawa hesitated and internally struggled to reply and smile because no, he did not want to merely keep in touch, he wanted to persuade you to come back to him. that's what he truly wanted.

you arrived at the park. there were just a few people because it was getting late and colder into the night. you sat down on one of the benches as oikawa ran to the nearby vending machine. he came back with hot matcha for you and hot red bean drink for himself. you remembered how you two and your friends joked about your drinks being the colors of christmas, which is closely approaching.

there was an awkward silence but oikawa cut through it by asking you about your life since you came home. you expected that he'd break the ice because oikawa hated awkward silence since you were kids.

you shared updates about everything, from work, social life, and new hobbies, but never about your dating life and the somewhat lack thereof. you just felt that you wanted to spare him from any details about that.

what you failed to notice--because you couldn't actually look him in the eye--was that he was both happy and regretful to know how well you're doing now that you're home. he wanted you to be this happy with him in argentina. but now that he saw your smile and heard your lively tone as you shared about your new life, the universe confirmed to him once more that home is where you're happy and thriving, and it broke his little heart even more.

"your turn!" you said enthusiastically, trying not to go back to the awkward atmosphere again.

"ahh, yes! haha. hmm.. i'm... i'm still a starter, still playing for the team. so... yup. nothing new, really. but it's all good." oikawa tried to laugh his awkwardness away, but he failed because it was still very apparent with all his stammering and fiddling fingers.

honestly, it's quite painful and unexpected to see and hear him like this. you wanted to ask if there's anything wrong, but you couldn't bring yourself to do so. deep inside, you were scared that asking that question might open a dam of feelings and words that would cause a rift.

as you were contemplating this, oikawa on the other hand was thinking how much of a loser he was. he hated being awkward in front of you. he was frightened that you might ask if there's anything wrong because if you do, uncontrollable tears and words might come flowing out from him. words such as, "i'm not doing great at all, y/n. i tried to move on, but i just can't. i desperately miss you and i can't take it anymore. it's no one but you. the true reason i came to see you tonight is to ask if we can start all over again. if it's possible for you to give me a second chance. i'm sorry. i'll do my best. i promise."

but he knew that blurting out those words would make things worse and might bring the two of you to a point of no return. he reminded himself that he's just here to see you, catch up with you, and rekindle the friendship. that's all.

"i'll walk you back home." he said with his pretty and sweet smile, the one you're used to seeing, and you felt relieved because you took this as a sign that he's feeling better now.

oikawa was able to smile genuinely like that because he finally accepted that you're just friends now, and forever.

"thank you, tooru. i really enjoyed catching up. seeing you here was a big surprise." you said as you arrived home.

"same here!" he smiled. "but... uhm, y/n? can i..." he added, suddenly averting his eyes.

"what is it?"

"can... can i... can i hug you?" he asked. "just a friendly hug!" he added right after.

"oh. sure, tooru." you chuckled. then you saw how his eyes truly sparkled for the first time that night.

"really? it's okay? thank you, y/n." oikawa whispered with an excited smile before going in for the hug.

it was so tight and warm, too tight actually. but you didn't mind it, caressing his back in return with your gloved hands.

you were smiling, thinking of this as a good way to end this catch-up night. but oikawa was doing his utmost best holding back tears. he was engulfed in happiness and desperation. it's been over a year since your last embrace, so of course he's very elated. but he was also reminded of how much he missed you and your warmth, of the pain of letting you go, and of the fact that he could no longer embrace you everyday like before.

in the past, he could hug you for minutes and cuddle in bed with you for hours. but now he was scared that he might scare you off, so after about five seconds, he let you go even though he didn't want to.

you bid each other good night and he watched until you safely entered your house, waving one last time.

now that he's alone, he could finally release the tears he's been holding back the entire night as he walked home.

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justanothercloudinthesky · 2 years

Text

Unrequited

Atsumu x Reader, Oikawa x Reader, Kuroo x Reader

notes: best friend falls hard, knowing all too well it’ll never work, but the heart wants what it wants.

Angst

Atsumu:

his laugh echoed again through the gym, full and magnificent, filled with childish glee as his eyes crinkled in the corner, head cocked to the side as he listened for more, eyes focused. the only wish in your heart at that moment is that it was you over there.

now, it would be ridiculous to be territorial over his time, toxic even, seeming as you’ve not talked a whole lot, and were just friends. Atsumu often leaving mid-conversation to find his friends. but you would also be lying if you were to deny that you... loved him.

you loved that abrupt cheer he lets out after a particularly good set, or the tiny glares he throws at his brother when Osamu points out his shoe’s untied. the way he chattered along, mouth half full, or when his eyes focused, perfecting his technique again and again. so why?

“they’re talking about cake pops” Osamu filled you in, leaning against the wall behind you, his eyes trained on your face, watching as the smile you plastered on didn’t actually reach your eyes.

“ah, I see that’s why he’s so.... engaged.” you murmured, watching as he placed an arm around them, joining in with them to laugh along too. you hated it, the bubbling, boiling feeling in your core, making you want to vomit, and scream and cry. the worst part knowing that it’s absolutely ridiculous.

“it’s for the best, he’s an idiot anyway, and I don’t want you to stop showing up for mario kart because the bozo with fewer brain cells ran ya off” Osamu added, and you smiled, aware he was trying desperately to comfort you.

ridiculous. but that’s never stopped feelings before.

Oikawa:

again, staring at your phone yet again, as a single text message popped on the screen, your homemade dinner growing cold. tonight was supposed to be the night. where you’d put in the effort. hoping just once he’d hold your hand during the movie, instead of screeching that your hands were ice cubes.

“hey there, I’m actually not coming to movie night, sorry. I got asked on date by ‘them’, wish me luck, this man is about to turn on the charm”

you stared at the screen, typing so many different responses, before settling for a simple thumbs up, throwing your phone to the other, vacant, side of the couch. it shouldn’t matter to you. best friends. you don’t mind... you... shouldn’t mind.

but all those little things add up, the one time he took off volleyball on a thursday night to plan to come over, he was bringing the ice cream, you were serving the snacks. all ruined cause of one text. You should be happy for him, but the next thing you know, tears are dripping onto the couch.

reaching over to the phone you shoot off a text to Iwa too, letting him know not to bother and to come over to take any food if he wanted to. the message left on read soon, as you set it back down as so much as texting felt exhausting.

now, maybe it all could’ve been avoided, but even so. even tho he hurts you. there’s no way you can be mad. for you’ve waited now too long to speak up, nodding along as he rambled about their gorgeous eyes. it would’ve been easy to simple ask, but then again. is anything regarding Oikawa ever simple?

so you sat there, tv playing, no ice cream to cry with. and nobody to blame.

Kuroo:

now, you should’ve expected it given his natural charm, soft eyes and boyish smile. expected him to sweep someone off their feet, and watch as he drapes his jacket over their arms, his conversation constantly filled with only them. no longer walking you home, as you shiver against the wind, tears freezing on your skin.

now, you’d never blame Kuroo, you should’ve been guarding your daydreams, keeping them grounded, even when he leaned in to check your homework over your shoulder during study nights, the edges of his hair tickling your face.

how he’d constantly ask you to the café, complaining that there was never any blueberry muffins left when he got there. your daydreams running wild as you’d gotten home, baking some, more and more, as you’d constantly gift them to him.

He had to admit, you were one of his best friends. but it stopped there, and you knew, but hearts retaliate in their own ways. breaking you as their ripped to shreds. over what? a polyester jacket. which brought you to now

walking the quiet streets, tears frozen to your face as you continue, phone left on do-not-disturb, as you hoped maybe it would get you out of your own head. walking along the roads, maybe to find Kuroo, maybe to simply appreciate the weather, or to cry where nobody could hear you. where your heart could tear you apart.

your feet finding their way to the café, walking through the door, as the heat stopped your shivering. looking up, growing instantly nauseous, as your heart stabbed you from the inside out, dying a little itself. the sight of Kuroo, feeding your muffins to his... special person. at your special table

so... maybe you were taking it personally, but, you never knew he found you so... replaceable.

#haikyuuxreader #haikyuu x reader #oikawa toru x reader #oikawa x reader angst #oikawa toru x you #oikawa headcanon #unrequited feelings #atsumu x reader #atsumu miya #oikawa #kuroo #atsumu x reader angst #atsumu x you #kuroo x reader #kuroo x you #kuroo x reader angst #CloudPassingBy #kuroo headcanon #atsumu headcanon

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shidouryusm · 2 years

Text

Under the rug

pairing: oikawa x reader

warning: cheater!oikawa, angst, slight fluff, oblivious!reader

A/N- yikes! i had to repost cause my tags are being a bitch. Also hope y'all liked it and any kind of constructive criticism is appreciated.

Oikawa gazes outside the glass window for the past 30 minutes looking as the wings of the plane cut through the vapours of the white cloud. He stares at it long enough for anyone else beside him to get concerned but in reality, his eyes are following nothing. He rests his hand under his chin and lets out a deep sigh, his head throbbing from the lack of sleep for the past 10 hours and the tumultuous dilemma that he is harbouring inside his system.

His mind races over the incident a few nights prior to his flight to Japan –where he will reunite with his original homeland. Reunite with you – the beacon of his life.

Yet.Yet he managed to screw up so terribly this time that just thinking about it leaves a foul bitter taste in his mouth and churns up his stomach with guilt.

His eyes go down towards his hand and he distastefully remembers how he tangled these hands around that lady’s hair. Her hair smelled exactly like yours – minty strawberry scent. His drunken lips messily clashed with hers as they indulged in a night of sinful passion and adulteration.

Waking up the next morning wrapped in with her, a terrible hangover and ice-cold clarity was one of the worst things, if not the worst, Oikawa has ever felt. And worst of all- there had been several texts of yours and few missed calls that you left for him concernedly. He called you back almost immediately. Hearing your voice laced with concern felt like shards of glass on his heart.

“Tooru, oh my god. You weren’t picking up my calls! Where were you?”. Oikawa never knew that he could lie so easily to you as he replied calmly, “I slept in early last night, babe”. Your relieved voice was a sense of warmth for him as he talked to you about his arrival in Japan.

“You need to be careful, babe” You say, oblivious from the other side.”Yeah. Well how excited are you that your gorgeous boyfriend is arriving after so long”....

Äll the while a naked woman lay down in his bed.

The voice of the cabin crew snapped his trance as the connecting flight from New York to Tokyo was soon gonna land. The regret feels like a teddy bear fashioned with glass shards – the more he hugs it, the more he is inflicted with the pain. He feels nauseous as he steps into the washroom and washes his face. Not that it does anything.

He finally was going to be in your arms. Minutes away from being close to you and seeing your face. But at what cost?

Oikawa feels the dull headache transform into sharp pain and he buckles himself up. His insides were at war. His heart is fighting tooth and nail with his conscious mind. Is he gonna tell you or sweep the matter under the rug?

It’s not that you’ll ever find it anyway. His shenanigan was too discrete to be discovered. But he knows things will never be the same– at least on his part. He is officially the cheater. The deceiver of this relationship. The unfaithful significant other. And you do not deserve this. You do not deserve any of this. You don't deserve him. Because your pure soul deserves so much better than his now tainted one.

You stood outside the airport, nervously shifting from one foot to another as a newfound anticipation washes over you. You look at the herd of people trying to find the tall figure of your boyfriend. You wait for long enough before your eyes catch the chocolate brown swept hair and eyes that match the beautiful hue. A rush of saddening happiness floods your insides as his eyes meet yours, you feel the summer sky has brightened up a thousand times more with his presence.

The thud of his heart was so loud that he was afraid everyone could hear it once he locked eyes with you. Your face glowed in the warm golden sunlight and he felt you like how he would feel the first ray of sunshine after a pitch black night. Your smile was equivalent to the bright sun that fell over his body and despite the infernal storm he is experiencing inside, he manages to bring out a genuine smile towards you . And the way you sprinted and hugged him, his heart felt the relief of a parched man tasting water.

His arms snakes around your waist and he pulls you as close as it could have been possible at this moment. Oikawa buries his face in your neck as he places soft but needy kisses on your neck. He hears you sniffle and let out a choked sob and his heart feels the crack. His eyes became hazy with the tears that he is trying his best to keep at bay. “I missed you, Toru”

I missed you too, Y/N. Hell I miss everything that was there before that night, Y/N.

Never in his life would he want to hear this sound coming from your mouth in that way. And it was that moment, he made the decision as he let his heart and the undying love he felt for you to take over. And he cries. He cries holding you delicately and yet securely. If he lets go, he’ll lose you.

“Angel, don’t cry please. I hate seeing your beautiful face smeared in snot” You playfully shove his chest as you let out a watery giggle and Oikawa feels like he’s 18 again. Heart racing every time he met you. You’re so beautiful. So effortlessly elegant and still holding the capability to make him giddy with love. Oikawa kisses your nose and then your cheeks as he hugs you tighter and tighter.

Only if he could have removed the few hours of that night with a scalpel.

He holds you close as you both pull his suitcases and exit the airport and Oikawa feels he’d let his mind win some other day. Now he wants to bask in your presence and sweep his past under the rug.

Thanks for reading

reblogs are appreciated

-xoxo

©-bokutoslittledoll2022. Please refrain from any kind of plagiarising. Do not repost without credits on any other social platform-not even tumblr.

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nightqueen1221 · 2 years

Note

hi there !! i recently found your blog and ive got a request ! oikawa and the reader being the "highschool sweethearts," everything seemingly perfect - until the reader finds out about oikawa cheating on them. so yes, an angst oneshot. female reader is preferred !! tysm, have a good day <3

YAY I'M GETTING REQUESTS! THANK YOUUUUU!!!!!! ( BTW FIRST ANGST AHHHH)

It was perfect. You didn't even believe perfection was real like this. Every morning you and him walked or met up at the school and late at night you two would walk to eachother's house ending with a good bye kiss. So many girls were unbelievably jealous of you. You can't blame them, you would be a bit upset to know that you can't be with him.

Well, that's at least what you thought.

"Hey angel, how are you?" Oikawa asked with a sly smile.

"Oh, I'm good, you?" You replied.

"Wonderful now that you ask." He said taking your hand and walking to your next class. It was the last class if the day and you couldn't wait. Oikawa had practice after school and you always watched him to support him. Even his teammates were a bit envious to have such a pretty girl cheer someone on. Yet again, this was kinda common for him.

You seemingly ran out of the class room. You wanted to see him as fast as you could. Actually, you got there before him. That's fine, you could wait a bit. Nothing wrong with that. You started talking to his teammates after a bit.

He must have just gone to the bathroom and is running late, right? You thought. He ran into the room the second you finished that thought.

"Ya-ho! Sorry I'm late!" He smiled waving his hand. You ran up to him hugging him.

"Hey! I misses you! Where were you?" You asked. "Were you in the bathroom?" He looked at you for a second in surprise, more like he realized something and than nodded his head. He kissed your forehead while rubbing you back, leaving to go practice.

When practice had ended he started to walk home with you. That slight bit of hesitation from before bothered you.

"Hey Oikawa." He looked at you.

"Earlier, you looked a bit shocked. Are you ok? Did something happen that you didn't want to tell me?" The same look of nervousness came upon his face.

"Oh, that! Haha, that's nothing, I only remembered a project I need to do or it will be handed in late." He laughed slightly at himself. It wasn't that much of a problem, and you have felt like that sometimes so it wasn't uncommon. You laughed back at this.

"Alrightly, just remember to do it all right? Don't want you getting a bad grade and than losing your ablitly to be in volleyball club." He held your hand and continued to walk you back to your place.

But yet, it didn't seem like it was something like that he was worried about. Because this kept happening, every day he would be late to practice. Even on days he didn't have it, he wouldn't be there to pick you up on time. The worst part is when he was a no show, you know you saw him early in the day so where was he? It started to annoy you and the rest of the volleyball club.

Today, you had enough of it. You choice to not even go to his practice and just search for him. You asked his teammates to call you if they see him. Walking around the school was usually boring, today however, you were on a mission. To find how or why Oikawa was disappearing so much. You had a looking feeling of what it could be, but you pushed it away from you in hopes he would never do that. I mean, you were in love, he wouldn't cheat on you, right? That is the last thing you think before finding him.

Well, it's just as you thought. He was cheating. It was a girl, he hand on his chest, kissing him with passion you thought you could never give. You were speechless. You didn't want to interrupt such a "loving and caring moment". That was it for you two. He wasn't going to be the man you want to be with for the rest of your life. You thought yet again, but, wasn't it dumb to think that in the first place? You were just teens dating, of course he wouldn't want to stay committed.

You didn't even cry, you just wanted to go home. Maybe deep down inside something wanted you to feel something else. Anger, sadness, maybe you wanted to just ask him why he would ever choose someone over a person that already is willing to do anything for you. But you did none of that. You just sat, sat and waited for him.

"You ready to go home?" He chuckled.

"I want to talk." You looked at the ground and spoke in only a stern and demanding voice.

"You know, I was wondering where you were going these past few days. Why you didn't show up for a bit, being late, or just not even showing your face after school. I started thinking that you might have been hurt or worse. Here I come to see that I was right about you hiding something, you were cheating. Well, if you want her over me, than I guess we're done, I wish you luck and hopes that she treats you better than I ever did or could have." You stood up look at his face for the last part.

"N-no promise me, I didn't mean to-, i-it, it wasn't my fault she did that to me and I just- it's not what it looks like, it wasn-" you cut him off.

"If it wasn't your fault than why? Why were you late everyday? Why did you not even show up? Why didn't you think about me? I don't think you care for me anymore. I hope this is one of the few more times we have the same things about something. Because I don't care about you either." You grabbed your things and left.

You walked home alone that night. And every night after that. You had just wished that he was still there. No, he wasn't. He never will be again. But he found someone he liked more. You found out you don't need him anymore. It was perfect, right?

#oikawa x reader #anime #x reader #request #oikawa fic #oikawa torū #oikawa x yn #female reader #reader insert #haikyuu x reader #Haikyuu #Angst #haikyuu angst #oikawa angst #Oikawa x reader angst

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c1nnam00n · 28 days

Text

Having a comfort fic but also has the most gut wrenching angst to it as well is perfection

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oreosmama · 7 months

Text

Voicemails After the Breakup (Haikyuu!! Headcanons)

*GIFs not mine*

A/N: I pity the fools who ignore this a/n bc WARNING, these are hcs without those stupid bullet points bc I have suddenly emotionally decided that they fucking suck. Anyways, I hope y'all enjoy the light angst, for all those survivors who are still vibing in this fandom. Enjoy!

Word count: 1968

Tooru Oikawa:

“I’m totally and completely over you.”

That’s how the message starts.

Part of you wonders if you missed something, or accidentally skipped ahead. It’s so immediate, like Oikawa could barely wait for the beep before tearing into you. Like he needed to spit poison the second he had the chance.

And it’s one of those biting remarks that he wants to let fester—for a while, evidently; he doesn’t say anything else for another five minutes.

All that follows is a loud thud, like he’s thrown the phone away from him. And then footsteps, like he’s pacing, pacing, pacing back and forth, trying to think of more scathing words by burning holes into his carpet.

You hit a point where you think you should delete the message, maybe try and not care about whatever else he may or may not say after waiting for so long. You nibble on your nails and tug at the snarls in your hair. You pick four pieces of lint off your sweatshirt and seventeen more off the blanket draped over your lap, and you know how many there are because you line them up and count them afterwards as you wait, anxious, listening to your ex-boyfriend’s panting.

But a small rustle stirs at that five-minute mark, right against your ear. And a sniffle.

“Fine.” Oikawa’s voice cracks. “You win.”

You suck in a breath.

“What do you wanna hear? That I miss you?” He sniffles again, then scoffs bitterly. “That I miss you so fucking much I can’t sleep at night? That my bed is so fucking cold now I can’t even stomach sleeping in it? That every girl I see I automatically compare to you because I have to—I just fucking have to, all because she’s not you. And it makes me sick.”

His chuckle is sour and crackles harshly into your eardrum. “Am I stroking your ego enough, sweetheart? Because you win. You fucking win.

“I want you back.”

He sighs, and it sounds like he’s rubbing his forehead.

“I need you back.”

More beats pass in the silence. More sniffles, too, but stretched out, like he’s trying to steady his breathing.

You don’t think it’s helping him any. As you wipe the cuffs of your sweatshirt underneath your eyes, his voice returns, thoroughly raw and wounded. It squeaks out of him, barely above a whisper. His voice is so loud and tender, like he’s cradling the phone against his cheek.

Your hand against his warm cheek, curled over that pink skin, fingertips inches away from brushing through those soft strands, wiping tears. That’s what you wish it was.

“I didn’t know…”

A shaky breath. You hold yours in return.

“I didn’t know anything could hurt this bad.”

He swallows thickly.

“Those last few moments after you left—I thought that would be the worst of it. When you just walked out. And I keep seeing you do it, over and over and over, in my head like I can’t help but torture myself with it.

“I never knew it would get so much fucking worse.”

He whimpers a little, and your heart constricts unbearably. You tear at the damn thing buried underneath your sweatshirt, massaging the skin like it can soothe that phantom ache.

Oikawa must hate you. Maybe he hates you like you hate him: not because of the breakup, but because you can go for weeks without seeing him, holding him, kissing him, and everything still hurts like that last time.

“Thing is, I could’ve sworn you weren’t always in my life. It’s been two years. Only two years. And yet I can’t remember a damn thing before us. It feels like it was always us. Some fog, and then you, and then everything afterwards. Everything that was us.”

“And I hate that we had it so good, YN. I really do. Because missing you has been the worst thing that’s ever happened to me.”

The frustration in his voice is familiar, a sickening sense of deja vu around it, and you latch a hand over your mouth at how vividly the image comes to you: Oikawa tearing his fingers through his hair, teeth gritted, cheeks flushed and shiny. Like when he lost a game, but different somehow.

Like this was something he didn’t even know he could lose.

He’s crumbling in a way he doesn’t know how to stop. That ugly part about having something wonderful and new—the moment it’s gone, what the hell are you supposed to do then?

“I just—Goddamnit, I can’t stand how badly it hurts anymore. I can’t,” he cries, desperate and aching, like his hand is fisting at his heart. You can hear the breath hitching in his throat, the hiccuping breaths after his sobs. You can hear every tear, feel it against your own cheeks, a soreness building at the front of your skull.

Too many tears. Your body is screaming at you, too many fucking tears.

But it’s him and he was yours and you were his.

Were.

You were his.

You had no idea how much that single thought could make your entire chest throb.

Oikawa inhales, and it makes your heart race against the thick wall caging it in, squeezing against it.

“I need to see you.”

He says the thought like it’s just slapped him across the face.

“I need to go see you, I—I have to.”

He mumbles to himself unsteadily, like he’s rocking back and forth. Debating, really, what he’s supposed to do, if he should do it at all, if it’s right after everything.

You should probably think he’s wrong.

You probably shouldn’t be curled over your phone, eyes wide, mouth open, not making a fucking peep. Waiting to hear what he’s going to do.

Maybe—just maybe—you shouldn’t be telling yourself that as the voicemail counts down to its final seconds, if he decides he’s not going to go to you, that you’ll definitely be going to him.

“I can’t just sit here. I can’t stay in here, without you. This isn’t right, I—”

Your breath hitches when you hear the frantic jingle of keys.

Then the sound of a door slamming.

His footsteps racing down his apartment’s stairwell.

A car engine revving.

“I need to see you.”

And the voicemail ends.

_________________________

Satori Tendou:

The message begins with a scoff of utter disbelief.

“Is that what we’re doing now?”

He pauses, almost like he thinks you’re going to respond.

“Heard from someone that I suddenly have syphilis. Yesterday, I had herpes though, so I guess I’m gonna have a tough week.”

A rustle like he’d shaking his head, like he can’t fucking believe it.

“And sure, okay, I figured that’s fine. You can say all that shit, and it won’t really stick because everyone knows it was us and that it’s you and you’re hurt.”

He sighs.

“But I saw it, sweetheart. I saw it.” The phone whines like he’s adjusting it against his face, and his voice is suddenly lower, darker.

“You don’t get to have it both ways, you know. You can’t spread all that shit—all those rumors about how shitty everything was and how we didn’t have anything going for us—and then turn around two days later wearing my sweatshirt. And you don’t get to wear that necklace I gave you for our anniversary and then run away from me the second you see me. That’s just not fair—you’re not playing fair anymore.”

Something swishes around like loose clothing, and a large huff greets your ear from what must be Tendou collapsing into a seat. When his little sounds become quieter, that relentless humming and the excitable clicks of his tongue against his teeth, you figure he must have put the phone on speaker and balanced it on his knee like he always did. Mid-conversation with Ushiwaka, he always used to spin his phone with those long fingers, or bounce the damn thing up and down against his frantic leg.

And the voicemail came through late last night, one of those dead hours where the only ones awake were Tendou, his scrambling thoughts, and the moths flitting back and forth outside his glowing window. He was always awake, always thinking, always doing something.

When you’d first broken up, after one long, wrenching fight where you’d both lost your voices and the frustration welled so high you just couldn’t breathe anymore, you’d been thankful for the idea of sleeping soundly for the first time in months.

You’d been wrong. You weren’t even sleeping anymore; just long, slow blinks where your phone screen would magically turn from 3:45 a.m. to 7:25 a.m., and in five minutes you’d have to get up and slug your way through another day.

Tendou had been the same. Those naturally wide eyes sagged under the pressure, and the curve of his spine had deepened like he’d been hauling the lack of sleep everywhere he went.

He must be sitting at his window now, at this moment in his message, pale skin aglow with wispy tendrils of moon. And he’s calling you. And he saw everything you’d done.

“Not fair. Not fair at all,” he whines, teasing. Always, always teasing, and if you hadn’t heard the slight cripple in his voice on the last word, you’d have gone on thinking he viewed it as one big joke.

You’re sure he heard the same thing you had—that he couldn’t keep acting like it was all fun and games. His usual, cat-like smile surely fell into a pert little frown, pale lips twisting like he’d sucked on a lemon.

No fun, no fun, no fun, he must have been thinking.

“Ya see, I thought we had a little deal,” Tendou drawls. “You’d talk smack and start dressing all pretty just to spite me, and then–and then I’d go ahead and delete all your pictures and put your name as ‘Bitch’ in my phone. And in, like, two weeks, we’d just be two ships, whoosh, whoosh, passing each other on the high seas of life, ya know?”

He breathes a ghost of a laugh.

“But, sweetheart, you look like shit.” He chuckles for real this time, and it’s disgustingly hollow. “I’m not even kidding. Like someone ran you over three times every morning—it’s horrible, really.”

You curl into yourself even further, and you’re smiling, grinning, lips peeling with how much you’ve cried and how little water you’ve drank after. You hate him; God, you hate how he can make you laugh and cry at the same time.

“But that’s okay, I’ll give you a pass just this once. I haven’t deleted your pictures yet, so I botched my end of the deal, too.” Tendou tsks his tongue.

“I won’t go easy on you, though. Here–here, how’s about this: for every day you stop wearing my clothes—because they look horrible on you, sweetheart; really, you’re painful to watch—I’ll delete one of your pictures, eh? That means, in about–uhhdivideby365daysinayearignoringleapyearbullshit–ah, seven years, I’ll have held up my end. S’that good with you?”

You lean your head back, letting the tears flood your hair as he chuckles to himself.

“Fuck it,” he says after a pause. Hopeless. Breathless. “Fuck it.” He must be gnawing on that pale lower lip, biting and nibbling until it bleeds. Because he lets something go to sigh again, and he must have smacked his head against the wall, and then you think he sniffled.

“I still want you. I’ve always wanted you. And I’m tired of missing you and wanting you. Doing both hurts too much.”

Tendou soughs.

“So I’m still your Chicken Tendy, baby. Always. And I’ll be here when you're ready, syphilis and all.”

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