bpd culture is getting mad at your fp for getting a date even though you're aromantic

.

Autistic Aroace culture is wondering if your lack of attraction is a part of the autism or not

Romance repulsed, but somehow, simultaneously being a hopeless romantic aromantic culture is feeling like shit and like I'm an invalid aromantic when I keep seeing romance negativity forced onto my timeline.

thinking about Lovejoy describing themselves in three words as 'Aromantic British Noises'

thinking about Lovejoy describing themselves in three words as 'Aromantic British Noises'

thinking about how the idea of aromanticism isn't nearly as widespread as it is on Tumblr/various other corners of the internet

thinking about how most people would probably assume the use of Aromantic as a descriptor would imply a lack of any kind of love or romance or close interpersonal relationships in their music which is INHERENTLY NOT TRUE

thinking about Lovejoy choosing Aromantic specifically, confident enough in understanding the actual concept/culture of aromanticism to describe their entire band

thinking about the potential for there to be someone(s) in Lovejoy who is either on the Aromantic spectrum or has considered it as a possibility and has researched it to understand it (and maybe themselves) better

thinking about hard about Lovejoys songs and realising that despite a few having vaguely romantic or implied romantic connotations, you could absolutely do an aro-spec reading of their whole discography

thinking about Lovejoy becoming part of Aro Culture in my heart

thinking about being aro-spec myself, and how id consider the term 'lovejoy' to still very much be my vibe despite that.

thinking about self described Aromantic British Noises, Lovejoy.

thinking about Lovejoy.

💚💚🤍🩶🖤

I can’t stand forced romance in media. You’re telling me this man and woman who’ve barely spoken to each other, have not flirted at all and have barely been together for three scenes are in love??? Like am I just too aroace to see it?? I always feel so surprised

Aspec men deserve much more respect and recognition in the aspec community than they receive. They often face a different form of aphobia specific to them ("men are naturally sexual they can't be ace" "all men are unromantic that's not unique") this rhetoric is spouted by many, even members of our own community and I hope for a day where that is no longer the case. As an ace and demiro woman (demigirl but that's beside the point) I want to encourage folks to take the time to give the aspec men in their lives support and to the aspec men reading, you are who you say you are no matter what people say and you deserve the world. I'm sorry for the ways in which toxic masculinity has harmed you. You are a valued member of the aspec community and the queer community as a whole. No ace or aro person is broken and neither are you. I'm sorry if anyone has ever told you otherwise.

got tired of all depressing and hating yourself for being aro vibes on legit any other platform besides tumblr (looking at you tictac app) so wanted to listen to positive aromantic playlists and legit could NOT FIND ANY??????

And the ones that were vaguely positive were made for aroace ppl. Which is great! But im not ace!!! So WHERE'S MY POSITIVE AROALLO REP?!?!?!

Anyways i solved this hyperspecific problem myself and made a POSITIVE AROALLO playlist:

Larger image of the playlist cover i made

you get it?

Aro/ace culture is not noticing the blatantly obvious signs that you are aro/ace all your life and later realising half the shit you thought was your personality is said blatantly obvious signs.

i think a lot about the loneliness of being aromantic. because it's something that's so profound, right? you're told your whole life that you need something to make you happy, to make you complete, to give you connection with other people, and when you realize you're aro, that's torn away from you. everything you've been raised to want is no longer something that will fulfill you. you are not built to be happy. and it gets better with time, it does! you restructure your world view, bit by bit, and the sting fades, but... i don't think it ever truly goes away. it's hard to express, because i love being aro, and i'm happy being aro, i wouldn't want to be any other way, but at the same time. there is such a profound heartbreak to knowing that you will never be someone's most important person in a society that values romance. that you'll never get the happy ever after that you were promised as a child. and you know you can be happy. but there's a lifetime of amatonormativity that lives in your brain and tells you that you can't.

Y'all are persistent huh

I know when I'm beat

aro culture is reading the word aromatic as aromantic every. single. time

Sex-repulsed asexuals and romance-repulsed aromantics deserve £100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 for everything

"can I be [x gender] if I..." "can I still call myself [x term] if..." yes. yes. if you like the term then use it. do whatever you want forever. labels are just little words we use to categorize our infinitely complex existential experiences on this floating rock !! no two people who use the same label are going to experience it the same way and that's the beauty of it !! use "contradictory" labels, use labels that don't make sense to anyone, change your label every day or not at all, explore anything and everything, use no labels at all or every label under the sun, confuse people or correct them or let them assume things rather than explaining, I promise nothing other people think about your identity is worth your happiness !!

Due to that post I made re: why it's hard for aros/aces to imagine a future for themselves because society tells you a romantic partner will always take priority, a lot of people (aros/aces and allos alike) are sharing stories about how they have been discarded by their close friends and it's breaking my heart. But allos and aspecs coming in and sharing how they have the same amount of love for their partners and their best friends/siblings is healing it.

Still, there are people in the tags saying that aros/aces can "never offer their partners the kind of intimacy they need" and so they shouldn't be "surprised" when they feel closer to partners than their friends. You guys are missing the point.

The point is that we should NOT be ranking our relationships. People aren't there to be ranked on a scale of "This person is my number one and this person comes after that." The point is that you need multiple people in your life. One person cannot - and should not - be responsible for giving you everything you need. Different people will give you different things that you need in life and you should value all of them.

The idea that a romantic partner will give you every single thing you need in life is a toxic idea in itself and puts undue pressure on said partner and the relationship as a whole. A best friend won't give you everything either. You NEED multiple people in your life and they will all give you a part of what you need, but there is no one perfect person out there who perfectly gives you exactly what you want. We need multiple people and they should all be valued by you. Love is not limited.

Memes based on my own awkward Arospec life, who doesn't love that?

And I promise more of my fantastic wit will be coming to your screens very soon!