#i wonder why. it didnt hurt like this before. it like. presses on my jaw somehow and it hurts. maybe the earpads are too big ? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kageyuji · 3 years

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shortening his name except he thinks you called him another guy’s name

⤷ oikawa, bokuto, atsumu, suna, mattsun ; [gn!reader]

GENRE/WARNINGS: comfort(?), angst if you squint hard enough, mild swearing

NOTES: i will literally offer my hand in marriage if you reblog. and thank you to @/sugawaaras for giving me the idea for mattsun’s <33

━━ OIKAWA

even though he tried to be confident, in reality, his self confidence sat on a throne built from things he told himself in the mirror and compliments he never believed

so its not a surprise that his first reaction just... isn’t one. he’ll stop and replay it over and over again in his head to make sure he’d heard you correctly

and then his heart breaks — it actually hurts him, makes him feel like he can’t breath, and before he even knows it theres tears in his eyes

of course, he knows you’re never supposed to let the reason you’re crying see you crying

so he attempts to act like he’s more annoyed than that he just had his heart just obliterated

it’s not a secret though. through the pain in his eyes, anyone can see the shattered remnants of what was once his heart

“ru, can you grab my phone for me?” you called to your boyfriend from the couch, remembering that you’d left your phone in the other room.

it was quiet for a moment; not long enough for you to ask if he was okay, but long enough that the silence was odd. you heard heavy footfalls again, then saw oikawa standing just inside the room with a clear look of betrayal on his face.

“what?” you asked him, wondering if he was kidding around. you hadn’t done anything, there was no reason why he’d actually be upset with you.

as he stepped closer to you, you could see the tears whelling up in his eyes, and you were left to wonder what was wrong.

“what’s wrong? tooru, hey, are you ok?” your voice was much softer when you spoke this time. your heart dropped when you saw him step back at your step forward.

“so now you can call me by my name?” you think his voice was meant to be low and hostile, but in his struggle not to cry it came out strangled and cracked.

“what did... do you mean ‘ru?”

“yes! who the hell is that? if you wanted to-“

“no no, babe, your name is tooru. the last syllable of your name is ru. it’s just a shortening of your name, not someone else’s.”

you watched his lips form a smile and he let out something like a laugh, seemingly at his own confusion, and then the tears finally fell.

he’d walked into your arms soon after, with his arms wrapped tightly around you and his face buried in the crook of your neck

“sorry... sorry for not trust- trusting you, i just-” his sentence was cut through with sharp breaths and hiccups, and then finally stopped with your own voice.

“it’s alright, i didn’t mean to scare you. we can cuddle if you want, hm?”

he was already struggling to keep himself from fully breaking down. but when one of your hands came up to pet his hair, a whine left him — you think it was supposed to be an ‘mhm’ to your offer — and his hands gripped tightly at your shirt, his arms around you getting tighter.

━━ BOKUTO

he doesn’t miss a beat, immediately looking up at you to wonder if he’d heard you correctly

it’s just a small spike of anxiety at first, but the more he lets the foreign name resonate with him, the more it makes him worry

he has to build up the courage to ask you who the other guy is, because he can’t do it right away, he’s way too nervous

he looks so sad as well, puppy dog eyes looking at you, seemingly just slightly worried

unbeknownst to you, his heart is pounding in is chest and with each passing second, it runs the risk of shattering

“‘taro!” your voice was a giggle as he left little kisses all over you. they weren’t nearly enough to leave hickeys, just little pecks across your face, your neck, your chest.

as soon as the name left your lips though, he stopped, golden eyes snapping up to look at you with a pain you’d never seen in them before.

you could tell he was definitely upset about something, but you had no idea what it could be. hell, the way he looked at you, it was almost as though you were the reason.

of course, you were unaware that bokuto’s first thoughts went to rintaro, middle blocker from the famed inarizaki. suddenly he was thinking of every time you’d ever spoken about the team, said how many fan girls they had, how many games they’d won.

he wanted to say something. he really wanted to ask what you’d meant. but the words seemed caught in his throat.

it wasn’t long before he couldn’t take it though, and he pushed the words out, despite the alarms going off in his head and his heart immediately jumping to his throat.

“who is ‘taro?” you didnt think you’d ever heard him sound so small. so timid, so close to his voice cracking with the tears he was holding back, so... scared.

“you? who else? i can call you kou if you’d prefer that though. you don’t have to look so upset.”

bokuto smiled then, relaxing the weight on his arms enough so he was on top of you. he supported himself enough not to crush you, but there was nothing more he wanted in the world right now than to be held by you.

━━ ATSUMU

he liked to consider himself a tough guy. he liked to.

but there were times whenever his support fell, leaving his world to crumble in his hands, slipping through his fingers no matter how hard he tried to hold it all together

and when thought he heard a guy’s name that isn’t his own come from you, it felt just like one of those times

he was asking what you’d meant before his mind could even properly register your words

and by that point he didn’t care enough to replay the name in his head, his mind already caught up looking for the things he’d done wrong, the things he hadn’t done.

“oh, ‘umi, if you want to we can go to th-”

“what the hell?”

it surprised you how much venom laced his words, despite the fact that you’d done nothing wrong. the thought that he was being sarcastic or joking with you crossed your mind, but atsumu wasn’t exactly the best actor.

he couldn’t fake the look on his face, couldn’t fake how his heart had seemingly stopped just from the look in his eyes.

“what do you mean?” your voice was soft when you spoke now, no longer so nonchalant.

he lips pressed into a thin line and he set his jaw in frustration. it took him taking a deep breath to finally say, “you called me ‘omi.’ if you like-”

“tsumu.”

“no, i heard you, you called me omi. if- if theres...” he never finished his sentence. there was already a lump in his throat and he knew that if he were to say anything more, he’d cry.

“no, no. i called you umi. like your name just a little bit different.”

his face was drawn in a look on confusion. his eyes studied you, trying to look for any sign of you lying. but he trusted you, of course he trusted you.

he came over to hug you, his arms wrapped tightly around you. you heard him sniff, but you knew he’d deny crying if you asked him.

“i love you,” his voice made him sound so small, it was a level of weak and vulnerable you’d not seen from him.

“i love you too.”

━━ SUNA

the words “stay calm” had never been repeated in his head to himself so much

well, it was more like a string of curse words with “stay calm” thrown in occasionally, but he’d never felt so scared

the look on his face is annoyed at first, but it quickly starts to shift into one with a little more worry

he’s terrified, in all honesty. but he’s already told himself he’s not going to let you see that

“taro, can we stop by a corner store on the way home? i need something.”

your voice had been so calm. so why did it feel like his heart had just been ripped out of his chest?

he knew you hadn’t meant to. but why you’d even slipped and call him by another name in the first place worried him. it took him only a few seconds for his mind to land on bokuto koutarou.

bokuto koutarou, one of the top aces.

“well fuck you too i guess.” his tone may have been confused with one of anger at first, but you could tell that wasnt it. anger is a secondary emotion, you knew in reality he was hurt.

the only problem is, you didn’t know what. from his words you knew it was something you’d done. but there was nothing that came to mind.

“sorry? what did i do?”

suna hesitated for only a second before asking why you’d called him by another name. he took a deep breath immediately after speaking, your silence only breaking his heart more. as though it wasn’t already destroyed.

but your silence was born from shock and confusion, not being caught like suna had assumed.

“taro. like rintarou. like your name. who else would i be talking about?”

“uhm. koutarou? i don’t know, forget about it.” he’d never felt like a bigger jackass before; he never swore at you.

you smiled a little at his words and walked over to hug him. he hummed at that and pressed a small kiss to your temple, then buried his face into the crook of your neck.

“i didn’t mean to-”

“it’s ok, rin.”

━━ MATTSUN

he had to stop for a moment to let it sink in before he could react

after that there were too many emotions rushing through him to do anything for another few moments

in fact, his silence coupled with the distant, betrayed look on his face was somewhat unsettling

it takes him longer than he would like to question you, but it’s because he’s already preparing to collect his shattered heart after one of his worst fears becomes true

“why are you here?” mattsun heard iwaizumi’s voice and he smiled a little to himself, knowing that he must have been talking to you.

he’d been waiting for you all day, it seemed like forever since he’d last seen you. the only thing he wanted right now was to hold you.

“oh, i’m here to see ‘kawa!” you said happily. mattsun could hear the smile in your voice without even seeing you.

you were here for oikawa. of course you were here for starboy oikawa tooru, of course your boyfriend was just a stepping stone.

he was still frozen when you rounded the corner. the look on his face was concerning, you couldn’t remember the last time — if there ever was one — he’d looked absolutely terrified, the last time he looked so hurt.

“mattsun... are you ok?”

he didn’t answer you. it took him a few moments before he could finally speak, and even then his voice was different than it usually was. it was... pained? betrayed? whatever it was, you knew it wasn’t mattsun.

“did you really come here just to see oikawa? what happened to me being your boyfriend?”

it took you a few moments to try and understand what he was talking about. you’d never said that. hell, you always came for mattsun, not once had you ever spared oikawa a thought.

“no, babe. i said ‘kawa’, as in matsukawa.”

he seemed to melt at your words. that expression disappeared from his face, his body untensing. he moved to pull you into his arms, holding you close to himself with a desperation he’d not had before.

him thumb rubbed soothing circles on your back. you could tell he wanted to say something. but then he stopped right before the words left him, instead opting to make a joke to lift the mood.

“good, i was about to kick oikawa’s ass.”

“...we were having a moment.”

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kashimos-hajime · 3 years

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no regrets (8/8) | r.b.

summary: For the first time, he thinks of a future he could have, and someone who loves him, and there’s something bright in his heart. Or, Reiner finally understands what peace is.

WARNINGS: MANGA SPOILERS!!! angst, mentions of violence, we get our happy ending :) pairing: reiner braun x fem!reader word count: 6.7k

a/n: welcome to the last chapter!! thank you so much for being on this journey with me. there are a few callbacks to previous chapters so see if you can catch ‘em all heheh

masterlist

crossposted on ao3 x

Few months ago ymir asked if I could let her write one last letter to krista, and I did let her. I stood over her shoulder the whole time, watching her pen down all this sappy shit and I kept thinking about you the whole time, behind those walls. What you were doing, what you were thinking. Maybe if you thought about me. I dont know.

I’m starting to see the appeal of wrting what youre not strong enough to say to a persons face. I never thought Id find myself on the other end of this stick. for some reason, I thought that I could stop myself, resist the temptation, or maybe that I didnt feel for you as strong as I thought I did once I was away from you. I was wrong.

What do I even say? I mean shit, I can barely see, my limbs are barely in tact, and all of it—shiganshina, it haunts me, even though I cant really remember it that well. Half of it goes black and then I remember hearing your voice, I remember Bertholdt, I remember you screaming.

You couldve walked away. why didnt you walk away? It doesn’t make sens. Why did you think to cut me out? Why did you try to save me? Im trying to make it make sense inmy head. It’s not working.

Fuck I dont know what I was thinking when I asked for a paper and pen. Why am I asking you questions? Its not like ill ever understand. At this point, I think it’s pity thats letting Zeke let me waste ink on trying to write straight. He doesn’t know what im doing, but thats better this way. Better than sleeping—better than eating. I just wanna talk to you and this is as close as I can get. Its my own damn fault, but I dont care.

I completed my mission. After this, im done. ill give up the rest of my term. I dont want any of that glory anymore. I dont want to be a hero. Im just done.

Fuck, my head hurts so much. I dont really know if what im saying is making sense. Im hoping you never read this.

im sorry. I wish I could explain it to you some day, but chances are, ill be dead soon. Whether for treason or because they need to pass on the Titan, and I wont be able to see you again. Which means youll never know how sorry I am. How much I

Thats okay. I dont think youd believe me now even if I did say anything.

I remember your dream to live by the lake with a bunch of kids. You know I started to wonder if youd mind if they were our kids, not just some orphans who needed a home. I’d imagine one of them with blond hair. Imagine them swimming in the lake.

Never told you that was my dream too. Never knew i could have a dream of my own, something only I wanted and not just something to further marleys damn agenda, til I knew you. Sounds stupid but its true.

I think youd like Marley, if we weren’t sworn enemies. Just want you here with me right now. make me sleep easier knowing you’re there when I wake up.

Dont want secrets either. Fuck I miss you so bad. I feel s o tired all the time.

I rember when i first saw you all could think about was how you were the most prettiest girl id ever seen. I don know if you know thats why I tried to distance myself. Knew I couldn’t get distracted from my mison. happened anyway. Wish I could tell you that.

wish I could tell you I love you. Wish I could see the look on yur face when you try lobster for the first time. Youd love it. Not sweet, but tons of desserts here too.

Shit. And the ring on your finger. ill put a ring on your finger. I promised. i swear ill go home and buy a ring for the moment I see you again. Might not be pretty but will do the best I can.

Olnly wnat only wnat only want to see you again and beg for your forgiveness. Let you know if I had a choice, I wouldnt have done it. Would take it all back, nd stay. i wanted to stay, stay with you and the others. I used to want to spend the rest of my life in those walls, now I think im sick and tired of them dividing people who arent even that differnet.

My eyes are beginning to burn. Worse because the skin is sitll growing back. Fucking hell god I miss you. miss your smile more.

I know i dont deserve your forigvneess forgiveness. I want you to be angry with me. I deserve as much, and I cant ask you to, but

With love,

Rienr

You fold the letter, eyes closing as your fingers trace where the ink bled, the old tear stains wrinkling the paper beyond measure. Some are older than others, and you trace over his name again, your eyes burning, your throat tight enough to suffocate.

You’re leaning against the wall as everyone disembarks. They had taken Eren off first, Hange and the others getting ready to depart for the city while Connie and Jean lift a covered stretcher too white for the vivacious girl that lays dead beneath it.

They pass you silently, and you catch sight of a certain captain approaching, his pale eyes nearly swallowed by the shadows haunting his face.

“Captain,” you say, straightening. Placing the letter back into the tin, you slide it back into your pocket as he folds a green jacket over his shoulder. You give him a nod.

“You made it out alive,” Levi observes. He stops beside you, eyes more focused on what’s ahead. No doubt he’s not looking forward to having to take Zeke to wherever he needs to go—somewhere far, far away from Eren. You cross your arms.

“It’s good to see you, too, Levi,” you intone. Sighing, you step in beside him and look out at the Walls you can’t see in the distance, your entire body wrought with a strange fatigue that’s only sewn into muscles by adrenaline leaving the body. “I think I’m going to stay.” He tilts his head to you, eyes flickering to your face, and you mirror the shift, your arms tightening. “I can’t leave this unfinished. Not after Liberio.”

“The farm will have to be abandoned,” he points out. “The kids, too.”

“I’ll make sure I move them where someone can take care of them. Somewhere north, far away from the brothers,” you assure, although still, your heart begins to sink and you close your eyes, exhaling deeply. “I have to hope they understand.”

Levi only nods, and you open your eyes as he wordlessly takes the jacket off his arm and offers it to you. Grasping it wearily, you open your mouth to ask questions but he only sets off, back towards the cabin where Zeke is still being held, and you snap your jaws shut, looking down at the jacket.

When you unfold it, you swallow the hard rock in your throat at the blue and white slipping beween the folds of olive green before there’s a sharp whistle. Looking up, you see the carriages already beginning to load up, and you glance back at the door where the captain has disappeared through before jogging down the ramp.

You slither your arms through the sleeves and shuffle the fabric along your frame as something thumps against your thigh, and you frown, reaching down into your pocket and coming into contact with something smooth and hard.

Withdrawing, your lips part at the green bolo tie gleaming in the lights of the port and you, without another thought, pull it over your head, letting it fall against your breastbone.

“For your services to the Survey Corps.”

There’s no time to second-guess now. No time to debate.

“Good to have you back,” Hange murmurs as you walk towards the carriage taking Mikasa, Armin, and the others back to the city. You tug the lapels of the jacket tighter around yourself and flash them a weak smile.

The Wings of Freedom on your arm feel like a brand, and it prickles your skin as you climb in after them.

Distantly, he remembers flashes.

Eren reaching forward for Zeke, the exhaustion ripping him every which way, the sound of ODM gear whizzing in his ears as he tries to make sense of the punctured sensation in his armour.

How he had softened his nape, intending to die then. At least, let his death have some meaning, he had thought. Let him make one last effort to repent for everything he did to Paradis, and to his friends who’d been more family than his own mother.

He slips in an out of consciousness for the next few days. He doesn’t know what is up, what is down, but he does recognize his surroundings blearily, the way his head spinning somehow slowing when he presses his temple to the wooden floor.

How can he almost hear your voice in the echoes of the panels, countered by someone who almost sounds like Annie before he drifts off again.

When Reiner finally regains consciousness again, he wakes to someone crouched down in front of him. Jerking up, he lets out a sound before a palm slaps over his mouth and your face is shoved against his own.

“Shut it,” you whisper fiercely. “It’s just me.”

Your name muffled by your own hand, his eyes begin to burn and you lift your palm away as he sits up and you draw back. You’re dressed in clothes that look like they’ve seen better days but you’re relatively uninjured as you pull back. New lines adorn your face—one of the many prices of their damned war—and you only look exhausted.

Sitting up, Reiner’s whole body groans as he leans against the wall, but he can’t tear his eyes away from you. Your hands are hovering around his body like you’re scared he’ll collapse and there’s a fracture in your mask.

Something gleams on your finger and his eyes flit to it, his heart lurching when he realizes what it is.

The ring. You’re wearing it. You…

For a moment, a glimmer of their teenage selves shine through and he wants to reach for it—touch it so he can remember what it’s like to be happy. He thinks it’s an awful like now; the swelling of his heart so big he can’t breathe; the way his lungs are static in his chest; how he can’t say anything because there are so many words that want to come out first.

“You’re here. You’re alive,” he finally settles on raspily. Your eyes glint with a youthful pain as you nod.

“So are you.”

And he doesn’t know who moves first—you or him. Nothing is forgiven as their bodies crash in an embrace that lacks grace, but they cling onto another like the world is ending and they’re the only ones left standing.

Maybe they are.

He buries his face in your neck, and your arms are so tight around him your fingers dig into his shoulders as your body melts against his and his skeleton sags in his own body.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers against your skin, eyes fluttering shut. “I‘m sorry.” A hand against your neck and an arm around your waist, he wraps his legs around your own and traps you against him. You seem to only sink into him even more.

Is that enough? I don’t want you to hate me.

You suck in a breath, and then it comes out shuddering. “You can spend the rest of what life you have left repenting for making me fall in love with a man who was always supposed to die.”

Softly, in his mind, your voice cools the searing heat of hatred inside him. It’s enough. It has to be.

“I’m sorry,” he says again. It’s like they’re the only words he knows. He can’t remember ever meaning it this much. For him dying, for making you love him, for ever coming to Paradis. For loving you. For loving you. “I’m so sorry.”

“I know. I know.” Your face turns to press against his own. Your lips brush against his jaw and his eyes slide shut, tears rolling down his face. “I read every single one of your letters.” Drawing back, you cup his face in his hands and your fingers smear his tears all over his cheeks as his palm rests against your neck. Thumb stretching up to touch your chin, he feels sobs shuddering in his throat at seeing you again—looking at him almost like you used to. “I can’t begin to understand, but I know you are. And I know you love me.”

Choking, he gasps, “You should hate me.”

“Yeah. Yeah, I should.” You’re crying, too, voice thick, tears stubborn on your cheeks as you give him a watery smile. “I should hate Marley, too. But it’s beautiful there. The water by the sea… I want to be there with you next time. We need to go together, before you leave me alone, okay?”

Reiner doesn’t quite hear you. He hears Marley, and beautiful, and he’s never noticed how beautiful you are when you cry, but right now, it’s the simplest truth he knows.

“Okay.”

When you tilt his chin up and kiss him softly, something inside him explodes from the gentleness that makes him want to crack in the palm of your hands. It sears him from the inside out, makes him grab onto you like you’ll disappear—this is another dream, isn’t it?

It has to be.

You can’t be kissing him again after four years. He doesn’t deserve it. You’re an illusion, something his mind made up to deal with the pain. He’s finally cracked for good, just like Bertholdt said he would, and he’s the devil, not you.

But then you pull away just for a moment to smile, eyes barely open as you look at him with a sad tenderness that wraps him in an invisible embrace, and he is faced with the heart-wrenching reality.

The sky is falling, you are holding him tightly again, and they’ve lost their years. But you’re here. With him.

He knows that this isn’t a dream as he feels the coolness of the silver band on your finger and the heaviness in how he knows he hasn’t repented a damn thing.

Why him?

As you run your hand through his hair, you press their foreheads together.

“And I do want a family with you, by the water if you’d like,” you murmur fleetingly against his mouth and his eyes widen, cheeks burning, entire face crumbling as he turns his face in to your shoulder, crushing you in another brace. Sobbing into your neck, his fingers dig into your shoulders, wrap tight around your waist, squeeze you so close he isn’t sure where you end and he begins and your lips brush the shell of his ear. “Reiner, say it.”

“Please,” he whispers thickly into your skin, and you cradle the back of his head with a hand. He’s nothing more than shambles. “Please, don’t go.”

“I’m not letting you out of my sight again,” you promise. His breath is hot against his own face as you pull his head back and cradle his face again, thumbs brushing away the tears from his red face. “Just a bit more. A bit more and then it’ll be all over, you know?”

And he understands, then, what you want from him. Struggling for breath, for his lungs to stop seizing in his aching chest, he cups your face that turns into his palm on instinct, your face wet with your own tears as, for a moment, they try to pretend this isn’t where they really are.

Like they’re still in that afternoon in Trost, a thousand years ago, with the kids flipping coins into the water fountain and a cream bun between them. Like they’re under the tree, apple juice on your wrist and his lips on yours.

Like it’s those trips to the city, the walks on the Walls. Honey is dripping down your chin and he’s pretending he doesn’t want to kiss you, or there’s grease smeared on his forehead, and you’re reaching up to wipe it off his skin.

Like a thousand moments all at once, and he nods to himself as you brush your hand over his temple. The world outside is startlingly quiet, as if the universe itself stopped everything itself to watch this moment, and Reiner takes a breath that bruises his sternum before he’s holding your left hand where that ring still sits.

And slowly, he pulls it off, whispering as firmly as he can. He’s sure he fails—he’s shaking all over from your presence alone.

“When this is over, I’ll put that ring back on your finger. I promise.”

The smile that splits your face is dazzling. It’s the smile he’s missed since the day he left it.

“We have a lot of things to work out, Reiner Braun.”

And your fingers barely brush his jaw before you’re leaning to press a sweet kiss against his mouth. It’s sugary on his tongue, like honey and apple slices.

Your back is warmer when you’re pressed up against Reiner’s. The ship is quiet, and their pinkies are just barely hooked on oen another’s as you stare blankly at the empty space between Connie’s boots. You don’t speak, and Reiner’s gaze is only on you. He can’t look at anything else now that you’re back by his side again.

There’s a cut on your cheek from the fight just half an hour ago, and there’s dried blood along your hands where your knuckles had split open, but everyone seems too exhausted to clean themselves up.

Reiner himself has a blanket pulled over his shoulders, and he sighs, slouching in his own sack of flesh.

Your head tilts towards him, enough that your temple presses against his cheek. His eyes close and he leans into your touch. Not a word passes by, but their hold on each other’s hands tightens. And Reiner thinks.

For the first time, he thinks of a future he could have, and someone who loves him, and there’s something bright in his heart. Something that hasn’t burned since he left Marley as a child.

Reiner thinks he doesn’t want to die anymore. He doesn’t want to miss you for another moment.

Raising from the steam, you groan, your hands searing from the inside out as you touch your face where you swore every inch of your skin had been stretched, but nothing seems out of sorts as you glance around. Everywhere, all your friends who had turned just as you had are in various states of disoriented. The air is still hissing, crackled with surprised screams and shouts of names as people look for one another across the field.

It smells like cooked meat and burnt hair, a none-to-pleasant mixture that turns your stomach.

Getting to your feet, you wipe at your face, trying to ignore the weird feeling underneath your nails and the ache seizing your muscles. Trying to ignore the remnants of Eren lingering like a ghost that won’t really leave you alone. You shiver, and a strange cold sweat takes over your body.

He had taken you to the sea, except it wasn’t the shore you were familiar with. There was a cabin nearby, with blonde children running, chasing after one another and a man with golden hair standing on the porch, firewood in his arms as he calls out silently. Or maybe you had been standing too far to hear.

“Eren… where are we?”

“Wherever you think you are,” he had said. “I just brought you where you wanted to be.”

A voice, quiet as a memory, catches your attention. “Here let me help.” A soft wind blows throw the mist, cooling your scorching face as you feel a presence stand behind you.

“Oh, thank you.” You look over your shoulder to see a tall boy, and your heart stops. Mouth dropping open, you stare at his foggy image, but he only smiles fully, a smile so tender it reaches every corner of you as you stumble forward, fingers stretching for him. “Bertholdt!”

His smile grows only that much more, eyes squinting a bit and a flash of teeth before he’s looking at your hand that passes through his chest. All at once, all the hope built up in your chest crumbles, and your hand snaps back, trembling just before him. He lays a hand over your own and your eyes begin to burn, tears slipping down your cheeks.

And then, softly, you barely whisper, “I miss you.”

Bertholdt’s smile merely grows, as if to say everything he couldn’t say before. As if to show he’s at peace now—that your last memory together isn’t every part of him, and your lips press together, trying to stop yourself from shaking.

Shadows form in the fog, and together, the two look as a freckled boy and another girl steps out of the mist a distance away, beaming like the sun. Connie and Jean stagger to their feet just behind you, and your heart lurches into your throat when you recognize them.

“Marco! Sasha!”

Someone calls your name and you turn around just as arms scoop you up and you let out a surprised noise before settling into Reiner’s arms. Looking over your shoulder to look at Bertholdt, your heart only sinks.

He smiles and Reiner lets out a sharp breath beside you, settling you down. “Bertholdt…” More shapes emerge. A shorter boy accompanied by another taller one, both alike in their features. You recognize one as the Jaw Titan holder before Falco, but the other—

“Marcel!” Reiner chokes out the name, hand stretching out to the fog, but the boy merely tilts his head and waves.

Closing your eyes, hot tears streak over your cooling flesh as you fling your arms around Reiner again and press your face into his neck. He cradles the back of your head, and he feels… somehow weaker, but still, there is that impassable strength in his core that wraps around you as he watches over your shoulder, still clinging on despite your clothes hot enough to burn.

I’m alive, I’m alive, I’m alive, I’m alive. It’s the only thought in your head. Your last clear memory had truly been the others taking flight, and the pain that had ripped apart your body before sewing it back together again in unjust proportions. Your limbs had been too big, your blood racing too warmly through your head as your legs pumped but your brain screamed to stop.

Your fingers had sank into Reiner’s legs to pull him down and you had watched—watched Jean take a bite out of him—

You shiver and Reiner’s arms tighten around you instinctively, constricting enough to let you know that his attention isn’t on you quite yet.

Boots shifting on the ground tentatively, your knees feel gummy as you draw back long enough to look at him. He still looks over your shoulder, and you follow his gaze to watch the mist retreat. Bertholdt and the other two boys fall into a pool of fog, and your lips part in a farewell, but it’s already too late.

He’s gone.

A wind sweeps through the battlefield, tickling your sweating neck and cooling your boiling blood.

“Hey,” a soft voice croaks.

Their eyes meet in tandem. He regards you softly, like you are the reason the sun rises and the stars hang at the sky. Overwhelmed, you can only cup the back of his neck and pull him into a deep kiss. Your other hand along his jaw, it takes all you can not to pull him into a bone-crushing embrace that’ll send them both to the ground.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” you whisper hushedly against his mouth, throat swelling as he lets out a soft noise of surprise as you pull him into another tight hug. You don’t care that you’re crushing him, just that his heart is pounding against your own chest. “I couldn’t stop myself. I’m so sorry.”

His eyes widening, he wraps his hands around your wrists and pulling you back just enough to kiss your fingers that crumple against his mouth. Clasping one of his hands in both of your own, you close your eyes and he uses his free fingers to brush the tears off your cheek before reaching into some dented tin you don’t recognize.

Eyebrows furrowing, you feel the heat leave your entire body, sapping your energy too, and your eyes snap to Reiner who steps back, cracking it open and presenting it to you.

“You’re not the one who has to be sorry. I don’t think I’m the Armoured Titan anymore,” he whispers. “I don’t know if I get the rest of my life back, but either way, I want to spend the rest of it repenting to you in any way I can, if you’ll allow me to.” A weak smile. “Truth.”

Your throat closes up, and you stare down at the ring so protected, gleaming despite the destruction around them. It looks almost out of place amongst the grime smearing your skin, the sweat drenching their skin, the smell of blood and metal clinging to their clothes, but Reiner only watches you with a tenderness you can barely meet. It’s so overtly overflowing with devotion that your heart is resting on your tongue, seizing control of everything.

You barely nod, chewing on your lip, trying not to cry even harder as his eyebrows rise in relief and he lets out a long sigh.

He lifts the ring out of the tin, snapping it closed before sliding the band back home onto your finger and all at once, everything floods you. The exhaustion, the pain, the hunger, thirst, grief wrapping around your bones and chaining you to the ground.

It’s over.

The minute he put the ring on your finger, it would mean it was over. No more blood, no more fighting.

Just like he promised.

You barely croak out his name before you fall to your knees. You trust him to catch you, and he does.

[THREE YEARS LATER]

Just after the Rumbling had stopped, you had gone back to Paradis alone and came back with three children to a man who was still uncertain in a world that was changing.

Since then, you’ve learned so much about the world, about yourself, about Reiner.

How he’s seized by night terrors even now, just like you, and how one thing that soothes it is going out for a walk while the sun still simmers below the horizon, the sky a dark navy blue spliced with orange rays. The intricate details like him making a point to tie his own tie because his father never taught him how or the way he has to chug his coffee so he has enough energy to get through the day.

And some days are horrible, haunting, but now, it is far outweighed by the good. He teaches Xav how to dress smart, takes the girls out shopping. Sometimes, he’s spotted around Liberio with a flame-haired boy riding his shoulders, you trailing behind hiding a smile behind some ice-cream.

Different nations, foods, cultures surround you now—citizens of countries coming to settle down roots, spread cuisine to Marley. The idea before, of humans so different than you but still similar at the root of it all, existing, still blows your mind. The technologies that you had never seen before, languages you’d never heard, sights you’d never seen, had all swarmed you as you stepped into a new world with him.

But there is always one thing you’ll come back to.

Leaning against the railing in the port city Reiner told you was the harbour he had left twelve years ago, and returned to seven years ago, you watch the clouds travel in slow drags across the pale blue canvas hung high above your head. The water spans for as far as you can see, glimmering under the sun and gorgeous enough to take your breath away. You pull at your coat across your chest absently, ignoring the tender growl of your stomach.

Breathing in the salty wind, you feel your chest expand at the litle fishing boats a little ways out.

Reiner was right. You don’t get sick of the sea. You never will—not of this much water. You still remember the first time you had swam in it, the salt-water making your hair crisp, the cold sweat forming on your your sun-warmed skin.

You feel a hand on your shoulder. Looking up, you spot blonde hair and warm eyes and smile. Your heart flutters a bit. You shift on your feet.

“Hey.”

“Hey.” Reiner leans down beside you, and you clasp your hands, letting the sea wind curl against your neck. Reaching to slip his hand in between yours, he sighs and you lean against his shoulder, glancing at their pile of interlaced fingers. “Are you okay?”

“Of course,” you whisper, although even still, you can feel a numbing at your fingertips. You remember what it was like to be a Titan, even now. The sensations haunt you—flashes of your own mutated body, the grotesque meat of your hands sinking into the ankles of the man beside you, the bloodcurdling roar spilling out of your throat.

Glancing at their fingers, you watch the flashes of silver of the rings play in the sunlight, your band now having a matching counterpart on his own hand. You grasp his hands tightly, bringing them up to your lips and his own grip tightens when you dust a kiss gently along his scarred knuckles.

“No,” you finally say at length. “I’m not okay. Going back to Paradis makes me nervous as hell, but we’ll manage.” He nods slowly, and you let go of his hands to wrap your arms around his neck. His own encircle your waist, pulling you flush against him and your eyes close at the familiar warmth—a warmth you’ve woken up next to most days for the past three years.

“Have you eaten yet?” he murmurs, and your fingers play with the soft edges teasing at your pads as his nose presses against your cheek. Your eyes flutter at the soft heat emanating from his skin, and you shake your head, melting against him. With one arm still around you, he slants his body away from just enough to pull a bag out of his pocket and it crinkles as he hands it to you. Taking it, you frown and look inside.

A cream bun. You can’t help the crumbling in your expression and Reiner holds your face in his hands carefully, kissing the corner of your mouth.

“Let’s stay positive,” he whispers. “We don’t know the situation until we get there and Historia briefs us.”

“I know,” you whisper and his entire expression eases at your words. His eyes gaze at you as if you’re the sole centre of his universe, and he cups your jaw more insistently, pulling you in for a gentle kiss, one you ease into, your eyes fluttering shut as his tongue traces the seam of your mouth. Laughing, you feel his little nose scrunch and your heart bounds up into your throat as he pulls back only to kiss you again, softer this time.

“Get a room!” A sharp female voice ruins their moment and you pull back just enough to see a red-headed boy running towards them and Reiner crouches down just in time to scoop Xavier up.

“When are you getting married?” he demands. “I was promised cake when you guys got married.”

“I dunno. When you move out of the house I guess,” you tease and Xavier pouts, rubbing at the side of his nose with the heel of his palm.

“Besides, you got cake for your seventh birthday, buddy,” Reiner groans as the boy twists in his arms. “You’re getting heavy. What are you feeding him?” he adds, smiling roguishly at you and you roll your eyes as Alina and Anya approach, sun hats protecting them from the glaring sun. Alina, grocery bags in hand, waves. Anya, who’d been the one to shout, tucks her coin purse back into her bag before flashing you a great big smile.

Only fifteen and seventeen. You can barely recall what it’s like being that young anymore, but you’re grateful they didn’t spend it the way you did. They get to know beauty, and no limits at all. The former comes naturally, the latter is partially because Reiner spoils them rotten.

Alina picks a flower with velvety purple petals from a bouquet she cradles in her arm, extending it to you.

“For good luck,” she says. “And protection.” Your heart melts at her words and you pause for a moment, looking from the gorgeous bloom to Reiner, occupied with the boy in his arms making silly faces at him. Then, without another moment, you sneak the flower behind his ear and he reaches up immediately to hold it against his head, turning to you in surprise.

“To protect the both of us,” you explain.

“Thank you. I’ll be extra careful now.” He looks at the girls, setting his free hand on Alina’s head heavily and she flushes, smiling grandly. “You three behave while we’re gone, alright?”

You nod. “Listen to Levi.”

“And listen to your sister,” Reiner adds to Alina and Xavier. The former rolls her eyes, the latter sticks out his tongue. “I’ll miss you.”

This is their home—their family that tumbles together into a huge hug, and you can’t help but stand back, watching how they all seem to merge into one unit, unaware of where one part of their reach ends and another begins.

As Reiner pulls you into the hug, your heart soars through your body, effortlessly pounding in your throat and in your fingers and everywhere at once. Liquid heat pools everywhere as Xavier screws up his face when you kiss his cheek, the same way Reiner does after he’s eaten something sour.

And maybe it’s a bit different, or a bit broken, the shards of their bloody history still poking at their heels whenever they think you’ve forgotten them, and it’s most definitely not perfect, but you would rather have it like this then anything else.

“Hey, guys!” Breaking apart, the family look over to see Armin, Annie, and Pieck walking over. Gabi and Falco meander a little bit behind, pushing Levi in his wheelchair, and Jean and Connie are running not far behind them, shouting at one another. You stifle a laugh and Xavier shimmies out of Reiner’s hold to run towards them. The girls follow after him, trying to hold back their runs but the closer they get, you can tell the more frantic they are to say goodbye.

So this is what they’ve made a peace. Something, you hope, is good.

Annie bypasses them quickly, making her way over to you and you survey her face as Reiner squeezes your shoulder, walking over to their friends. Her blue eyes are fixed on your face, and you feel your lips curving into a smile as she shoves her hands in her pockets. Her hair is swaying in the wind, gleaming flaxen, and you remind yourself, not for the first time, that Armin and Annie’s kids, if they ever decide they want them, will be gorgeous.

Hope for the future, and all that.

She stops in front of you, tucking a strand behind her ear.

“So,” she says at length, “we’re going back to Paradis. I’m surprised you decided to come with us. You don’t owe any of us anything.”

“I know. But… you’re my best friend. You do the talking, I fly the getaway plane, right?”

“Yeah. There used to be a time when it probably would’ve been the opposite.”

You nod, and they stand in silence for a moment, watching each other. Two women who should not have been friends, but were against all odds. You don’t think you would be here today if it weren’t for Annie.

Your heart lurches and you take a step forward just as she does, her mouth open to say something. You throw your arms around her and she lets out a noise in surprise as you close your eyes. Arms coming underneath yours, her hands dig into your shoulders and you smile against soft hair as she sighs, easing into your hug.

“Finally working together on an actual assignment,” you mumble and her head tilts as her small frame shifts, a hand patting you on the back as a sign for you to back up. “Just like we always said we would.”

Bluntly: “Just don’t do anything stupid.”

“You, too.” Pulling back, the two look at one another for another soft moment before you remember the bag in your hand and you shift the bun up in the bag, extending it towards her. “Want some?” Her eyebrows rise in faint delight, before she’s reaching over, pinching and tearing a piece off.

You grin and do the same and you gesture for her to come stand by the rails with you, stuffing the bag into your coat pocket. Leaning against the warm metal again, you hear a seagull call. The plane you’ll be flying to Paradis floats on the water, the technicians giving it the final check before you take off.

If anything goes wrong while you help prepare and oversee accommodations for the rest of the ambassador group, you’ll remember to fire the black signal flare, but you trust Historia. You trust your friends.

You glance over at them, all laughing, and you notice that the flower has gone from Reiner to Pieck, who’s taking it out of her dark hair to tuck it into Jean’s, and his cheeks redden as he brushes it more securely behind his ear.

Annie catches your attention again, pointing out idly that they’ll have to separate soon when they finish with the plane, and you tell her to just wait a couple minutes more as Reiner catches your gaze. Setting Xav, who has somehow wormed his way back into his arms, down, he walks back over to you, and his hand trails purposefully over your back before resting at the nape of your neck, a reassuring weight on your body.

“You guys okay?”

“We’re fine,” Annie replies. “You have a clingy boyfriend,” she tells you.

“I think it’s charming.”

She rolls her eyes. Reiner smiles, and you pat the railing beside you—silent invitation. He leans in on your other side, clasping his hands and watching the fishermen pull themselves to shore, singing a tune to each other—one familiar to all three of them and one that you wish you could get out of your head.

“Soon may the Wellerman come…”

A faint breeze tickling at your fingertips as a sharp call for embarkment splits the harbour, you simply sigh and look over at Reiner. “I just want these last few moments to last.” His eyes meet yours, and he leans forward to press a kiss between your eyes. Annie lets out a soft noise of disgust and you bump your hip against her as Reiner pulls back.

Closing your eyes and lifting your head to the wind, you can almost imagine the one person missing standing on the other side of Annie, dark hair like spun, stained bronze and eyes like warm chocolate. He’d smile and tell them not to worry in that sincere way of his that makes you believe every word he says—as long as they were careful, they wouldn’t walk into any traps.

Your chest aches, and your lips tug into a heart-wrenching smile as you begin to sing along. Reiner slips a hand in between yours, pressing his temple against your head and you loop your other arm through Annie’s.

She rests her head on your shoulder, listening to your voice, eyes on the sailors bringing in their haul below them. Reiner hums the shanty softly, distractedly, eyes cast across the sea.

You tilt your head up to the sky, at the stars you cannot see but will join one day, and smile.

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ouranoa · 3 years

Text

tw: suggestive, swearing. [not proofread]

ever so slowly, you felt your eyelids shutting. it was getting late and you were getting tired. it was understandable that he was an executive member, and that they were to attend any meeting that was organized; however, you never understood why they were so damn long. the alcohol you had been drinking was beginning to sink into your system, the feeling of exhaustion washing over you- it was too much for you to fight back. there's nothing wring with having a little nap, you thought, he probably won't be back for another 45 minutes or so. Finally giving in, you allowed your body to indulge into your sleepy sensations and drift off to sleep.

not even 10 minutes into your cat nap, a white hooded figure pushed your room door open and stepped inside. your vision was hazy so you couldn't make out their facial features, and you were far too tired for your body to react in a panic. your senses had not yet awakened, and you weren't bothered to hear the faint noises they made. that is, until they began to speak.

"fallen asleep already? sweet."

your eyes snapped open, and your limps stirred from their stiff form. the deep voice that rang in your ears brought a sense of relief yet excitement to you.

"you're finally back," you replied arching your brow

chishiya removed his hood and flip flops before sauntering towards you.

"yeah, something came up and things are....out of the ordinary let's say."

"this whole fucking thing is 'out of the ordinary'" you snapped back, raising your digits to make air quotes.

instead of replying, he hauled himself onto the bed next to your form, causing it to shift ever so slightly. lifting his hand to your jaw he said in a sultry voice.

"so you missed me that much huh, baby?"

damn him. he wasnt even trying, yet he knew how to get you worked up in the simplest of ways. but you weren't giving in. not tonight.

you tilted your head away from him, averting your gaze to a painting of an elegant woman. you didnt want to make things awkward though, so you attempted minimal conversation.

"did the militants give you any trouble?"

you heard nothing for a second, then he answered.

"please, they're too idiotic. even if they did do something to hurt me or any of the exclusive members, they wouldn't have thought it through and that would only cause more chaos to surface."

you smiled. there was just something about his cockiness that made him so attractive. the way his brain worked, hell, even the way he spoke. didn't know how you managed to claim him as yours, but you weren't complaining.

"what about you?" his gravelly voice filling your room

you sighed. his life was more interesting than yours by far and you kinda wished that something would come up to you.

"no. just seeing people feeling each other up, alcoholics being stupid- you know, the usual stuff."

forgetting about what you had told yourself, you chanced a glance at him; but as if on cue, his eyes met yours. you stiffened. this was the first time you got a proper look at him and he looked hot.

his silver hair swept across his face perfectly covering a little section of his feline eyes. his brown orbs looked so cold and you find yourseld getting lost in them every time you look at them. his lips, so luscious as if they were made to be kissed. your faced inched closer to his involuntarily.

you were swimming in dangerous waters now, and whatever move that you or chishiya made could most likely cause you to drown. but you were getting tired. you wanted him and you couldn't stand him and his silent teasing.

you pushed your lips onto his and waited. you felt him chuckle before his hands cup your cheeks. his lips shifted causing a pleasant harmony between the two of you.

as the seconds went by, the deeper the kiss got. chishiya maneuvered his tongue into your mouth. you were distracted by his wet muscle so you were caught off guard when one of curled around your neck. you gasped at the sudden lack of oxygen and he took this opportunity to start painting purple and pink flowers on your collar bone.

he laughed and airy laugh and said, "i was waiting to see how long you'd last. i could see the need in your eyes."

he removed his hand from your neck, and you took a deep inhale.

"you're so cocky, you know that?" you panted, unbuttoning your shirt.

chishiya rolled on top of you and smirked, making you feel small. "mhm, but you love that shit."

once your shirt was removed he lowered himself to your stomach and began to kiss down it your breathing begame ragged and you tried to compose yourself. it wasn't exactly effective though.

you were about to loose yourself when his actions came to a complete stop. you remained still for a split second before arching your neck to look at him. he blinked a couple of times before removing his face drom your middle.

his expression was unreadable, but it almost looked like he had forgotten something.

then, all to quickly he got off the bed and was putting on his flip flops.

"ch-chishiya," you stammered, still recovering,"where are you going?"

"i have to take care of something. i'm sorry y/n."

you let out a groan of frustration. for fuck's sake.

"when will you be back?"

chishiya didnt respond for a moment and stared at the door, keys in hand. he was thinking.

"not until later tonight," he began, grabbing a handheld transceiver, "you'll have to leave soon too. get dressed and be downstairs in about five minutes."

he wasn't going to lie, chishiya felt bad for leaving you hanging like that, but he had a job to attend to. so, as a way of apologizing, he rushed over to you and pressed his lips on your forhead.

even if he did make you agitated at times, you still loved him and couldnt ignore the fact that he was a sweet man. watching him leave your room pained you, but you got up to get dressed anyways.

yes, your boyfriend seemed unbothered about the whole situation, but you didnt keep your mind from wondering about what secrets lie within the beach

authors note: [okok, i am feeding my fellow 'alice in borderland' starved fans since theres literally no fics on it yet. love y'all and sorry if it was bad lmfao 😗🤍]

here matey c: @donnyhateslife @cruel-spider

#shuntaro chishiya #alice in borderland #x reader

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peterrparrkerr · 3 years

Text

Aliens made them do it - read on ao3

Second card is officially done!! I'll be posting the masterlist tomorrow and will start posting the third bingo card in August!

*-*

Peter doesn't cry. He doesn't. Not when he's separated from Tony and the others, and not when Ronan presses the barrel of an alien blaster to his head.

He didnt cry, because he knew this was a possible outcome to staying on the ship. He knew that there was a possibility that this would happen.

He told Tony he thought this through, and he had.

But damn was he terrified. He shook with fear and cold, on his knees. They'd stripped him of his suit, leaving him in his boxers. He knew space was cold, but he never expected it to be like this.

"They're recruiting young, I see," Ronan hummed, walking around Peter's hunched and trembling form. "They must be desperate."

"I'm stronger than I look," Peter said, putting on a brave face. He was going to die anyway. He wanted to die like Spiderman, not like Peter Parker.

"I'm sure," Ronan hummed. He finishes his lap around Peter before standing in front of him. "Has anyone told you what exactly you were up against before throwing you to the lions?"

The barrel of the gun presses under Peter's chin, forcing him to crane his neck. He swallows thickly, blinking rapidly against frightened tears.

"Something as tiny and fragile as you must know you stand no chance against the almighty Thanos," Ronan continued, not giving Peter a chance to answer -not that he would.

"Its a suicide mission," the blue alien continued. "One that landed you in my grasp, and no closer to Thanos.

"And what to do with you," Ronan hummed, looking deep in thought for a moment. Peter felt his mouth grow dry.

Aunt May would never know what happened to him. He'd leave her all alone. And what happened if none of the other Avengers could stop him?

Would she be one of the ones killed by Thanos? Or would she be left behind. Left wondering if Peter was alive somewhere or gone like the rest of half the population. Peter didn't know which was worse.

"Killing you would be a waste," Ronan continued, oblivious to Peter's inner turmoil. "I'm sure we could find some way to entertain ourselves, hmm?"

Peter's first thought was torture, and he felt his breath hitching. It made Ronan grin, dark teeth juxtaposing against his blue skin.

"Oh, yes, I have the perfect thing for you and your little friends."

Peter tried not to shout when Ronan grabbed him by the hair, but he tugged Peter from his knees, and he couldn't help it.

Peter gripped Ronan's wrist, wincing and whimpering as he was half dragged across the floor.

"I've always wondered how humans worked," Ronan mused. "And now I've got four of them."

"Please-" Peter gasped wetly, tears burning his eyes. Ronan takes him into a dark room and yanks him forward before dropping him.

Peter falls onto his chest, not having enough to catch himself. He coughs as he gets his hands under him, pushing himself off the ground.

A heavy boot lands on his back and shoves him back down, and Peter grunts, scrambling to get up off the floor.

"Now now, no need to make a fuss," Ronan murmured, voice deep. "Bring in the sarcastic one. Take the other two humans and have fun."

"No!" Peter shouted. "Le-leave them alone-"

He's cut off when the boot grinds down on his shoulder blade. He winces, chest heaving as two other blue aliens leave the room, shutting the door behind them.

"Its best you behave, human," Ronan presses, leaning over Peter, putting more weight on Peter's back. "Your behavior from here on out determines how fast you and your friends die at my hand."

Peter chokes on a sharp exhale, tears spilling over his eyelashes.

It doesn't take long for the doors to open again, and Peter can hear Tony, grumbling and digging himself into a hole, like always.

"Ah, just who we were waiting for," Ronan said cheerfully. "Come join us."

Peter lays on the floor under Ronan's boot, knowing he wasn't strong enough to buck him off.

Tony comes into his line of sight, and he looks pissed. Thdyd taken his suit too, though he had a track suit on underneath.

Peter stupidly wondered if Tony would make his suit able to hide clothes as well -so he didnt have to go around in his boxers- before remembering there wouldn't be a chance to.

"You okay, kid?" Tony asked, eyeing Peter. Peter could only nod.

Ronan removed his boot before bending down and grabbing Peter by the hair.

Peter yelped and scrambled to his feet, and Tony took a step forward, face contortions in rage before two other Kree grabbed him by the arms.

"Humans are so strange," Ronan hummed, pulling Peter in close by his hair. Peter held onto his wrist, wincing and stumbling as he was guided around. "Your customs and traditions have always been odd, though I've never seen them practiced."

Peter whimpers as Ronan draws his head back, exposing his neck. He looks down at Peter just as Peter feels cold metal press into his throat.

"Leave him alone," Tony demands. Peter can't see him, but he knows from the scuffle that he'd tried to charge at them again but was held back. "I swear to God, you kill him and I'll blow this ship to pieces."

Ronan chuckled, eyes alit with amusement. "I'm not going to hurt him yet," Ronan promised.

"Not until I see you fuck him."

Peter's eyes widen at that.

"Fuck you," Tony snapped. Ronan laughed. "No fucking way am I going to do-"

"Either you fuck him, or I kill you where you stand," Ronan growled, aiming the alien tech towards Tony.

"Do it," Tony growled back. "I'm not scared of you."

"No?" Ronan asked. Peter lets out a desperate sob, trembling against the alien. "He seems pretty scared of me."

Peter can't help flinching when the alien blaster is pressed back into his throat.

Ronan then leans down, dark purple tongue poking out between darker teeth. Peter cries out, struggling against his hold as the alien licks a strip up Peter's cheek, from jaw up to his eyebrow.

"Fuckin- leave him alone!" Tony nearly screams. Peter manages to turn his head, but it tightens the hold Ronan has on his hair.

"Fuck him, or I will," Ronan demanded. "And I wont be nice about it."

Peter doesn't think his knees will hold him much longer. He openly cries, breath heaving in his chest.

"You can't-" Peter gasped out.

"Oh, but I can," Ronan said. "Do you think your fragile human body can handle me, little one?"

Peter chokes on a sob, struggling in his hold a little more as Ronan licks at his jaw again.

"I've heard humans tear so easily," Ronan continues, loud enough for Tony to hear over Peter's crying. "Poor thing might die before I even get a chance to fuck him properly."

"Fine!" Tony shouted. "Fine, alright, I'll do it- just- just let him go."

Ronan smiles against Peter's skin, and he's suddenly released. Peter almost drops to the floor, but he catches himself and rushes from the alien, into Tony's chest.

The older man is quick to hold him tight, hashing Peter and holding him tight.

"I'm waiting," Ronan called. "Entertain me."

Peter buries his face deeper into Tony's chest, arms wrapped around his torso.

"Pete," Tony winces, lowering his head. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

Peter shakes his head, sobbing breathlessly. He doesn't fight him when Tony pulls him to the floor, the whole time apologizing over and over.

"Just- just lay down, Peter," Tony murmurs, his own hands shaking. "Close your eyes."

Peter sobs as he lays on the cold ground, body stiff and vision blurry.

He can see Ronan and the two other Kree watching them, sitting and smirking together. Peter tries so hard to calm his crying, but it seems to make it worse.

Tony takes Peter's boxers off, kneeling between his legs.

Peter covers himself with his hands, trembling.

"I'm so sorry," Tony murmured, leaning over him. Peter can't look as Tony takes himself out of his pants.

He's never prayed for death before now. He sobs and begs for this not to happen, for Ronan to just kill them and get this over with.

"I'm sorry."

Its the last thing Tony says before pressing into him. Peter arches, a strangled cry forced past his lips.

He can hear the Kree laughing, egging Tony on. Peter sobs as Tony presses all the way in, lowering himself.

Peter realizes he's hiding Peter as best he can, resting on his elbows. Peter wraps his arms around Tony's neck, burying his nose into his shoulder as Tony thrusts into him.

It lasts forever. He knows neither of them are enjoying it. But Peter knows why Tony's doing this. Knows why he chose to do it instead of letting Ronan.

And Peter can't help but love him for it. But he hates him too. Hates that the two of them are in this position.

Mostly he hates himself. He should've listened when Tony told him to go home. If he had just stayed on the bus, Tony and Dr. Strange might've gotten away.

"I'm so so sorry, Peter," Tony whispered against Peter's ear. He sounded wrecked, broken and disgusted with himself.

Peter whimpers against his shoulder as he's fucked into the cold floor.

"Its okay," he manages through his crying. "Its okay, its okay."

Tony just shakes his head, exhaling wetly against him.

Peter feels his balls tighten up, and he hates himself. He sobs and closes his eyes, hiding his face against Tony seconds before he cums.

"Shh, shh," Tony hushes, holding Peter tight. "I've got you."

But Peter knows he doesn't. Not really. He's just as defenseless as Peter is. They're trapped in space with aliens just slightly less villainous than Thanos himself.

He has to bite back a mewling sob as Tony cums moments later, painting Peter's inner walls in warm semen.

He doesn't stay attached to Peter for longer than needed. Peter's boxers are pulled back on and then Tony is pulling Peter into a seated position.

"There, you happy?" Tony snapped, hugging Peter to his chest. Peter trembles against him, burying his face in Tony's track suit.

"Very," Ronan hums. "Take them back to their cages. I might want to play with them a little later."

Peter can't stop crying when they're locked in their small four by four cage. Hes leaning against the bars, knees drawn up and arms holding his legs tightly.

Tony's on the other side, putting as much distance between them as possible.

Stephen and Quill's cage is still empty to the left of them, but to the right, Drax and Mantis sit. Peter can't even look at them.

Can't look at Tony.

He tucks his face into his knees and lets the sobs wrack his body, shoulders shaking with each shuddering breath.

#marvel #tony stark #peter parker #starker #ironman #spiderman #my writing #ao3 #sfsummerbingo21 #nff

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i8jisoo · 4 years

Text

𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐘 𝐊𝐈𝐃𝐒 ⇉ skz with pregnant!reader

hyunjin x reader | part four of dad!skz

↬ genre; fluff

↬ warnings; pregnancy, lots of cursing (i have a streak), birth, n kkami bein a meanie

↬ notes; ok this might be my fav in the series | 1.5k wc

u and hyunjin actually were broken up when u found out about the pregnancy

u waited (stalled fuck off) until five months since u really didnt know what to do with the news

u kinda feel like ur insane, playing your ex-boyfriends music constantly and watching interviews of him but it kept u company and gave u a reminder that u still needed to tell him

u got this rly cute popped out bump, just rly kinda like those movies but u know its gonna get bigger and grow to have stretch marks

one day ur just sitting on the sofa of your apartment n the next thing u know ur door is being opened and hyunjin is barging in

ofc ur in a sports bras and a pair of basketball shorts cause they r comfortable and shirts r overrated

ur there with set out marshmallows, graham crackers, and chocolate, as well as peppermint sticks on the side just eating them together

ur in the middle of eating a smore u had put together

u swallow ur smore slowly, sucking on ur fingertips n just staring at him

“oh my fucking god- and it’s true?”

ur honestly so confused until u remember u dont have on a shirt n ur bump is showing

ur standing up in a millisecond, hyunjin getting more upset by the second just looking at u

“why— how? how could you just not tell me?”

baby boy has those angry tears and the strained voice hes just so upset and the guilt is setting in for u

“i’m five and a half months.”

fuck hormones cause next thing u know ur crying and u cant do anything to make it stop

u guys really can’t be mad at each-other, ur relationship was filled with nothing but kindness and it ended only because u two felt it was going no where

ofc u two argued about it and in the end hyunjin was the one who walked out

“we can try again. you can move back in right? we can stay together and put back the pieces.”

u agreed n by the next morning he was there to help u pack ur things up n take them back to his place

he ends up seeing the box of baby stuff, with unopened bottle packages and sonograms, as well as a disc that was labelled as your 3D ultrasound

u find him just sitting there, staring at the black and white sonogram with tears freely falling down his cheeks

he doesn't even notice u next to him until ur thumb swipes the tear away from his cheek

u two just smile at each-other, his arm wrapping around u n pulling u in to his side

“that’s our baby?” he asks, not removing his eyes from the little white blob that barely was the size of a jaw breaker n u just whispered, “yea, it is.”

ur relationship doesn’t exactly get back into what it was at first,,

ur both nervous and cautious around each other

at first he insists he can just sleep on the couch so u can take his bed but u insist u both can sleep together

hyunjin doesn’t mean to but he somehow always winds up with his arm around u n ur bump every morning

he will talk to the bump n tell them how they r gonna have the best mommy n daddy 🥺

“did u know ur mommy is one of my favorite people to be with? i know ur gonna hear the story one day of how we became parents but i have always loved her, even when we weren’t together i loved your mommy. i hope one day you will love someone as much as i love your mommy, i hope you get your mommy’s personality bub.”

ur fake sleeping wbk but u dont move so u can let him talk

around eight months u two are way more comfortable n are getting closer

he lets u borrow his clothes because u used to do that even when u weren’t pregnant and he figured they were more comfortable & better looking than ur maternity outfits 😣

he rly goes the whole nine yards, buying anything u can think of for the baby n he’ll sometimes wake u up from ur sleep (if he’s rly excited) just so he can show u what he bought

hyunjin is in love with u and kkami cuddling together

also when ur due date got closer u both def went out for walks with kkami or played in the dog park with kkami

(u couldn’t really be as active as hyunjin but it was fine with u just watching)

something within hyunjin changes n he just gets so shy n flustered around u ^.^

he’s crushing so hard on u and u can guess he is but then again u two were just living together for the pregnancy

it’s probably three in the morning n hyunjin had just came home

ofc u were crying

a rly cute dog ad was playing with a baby in it as well :(

u explain n hiccup while doing so

hes so s o f t at this moment

he presses a soft kiss to ur lips n ur like wow thats um—

he doesn’t even care how shocked u r this man goes back in for more kisses

“i want you, i wanna be a real family. i wanna one day marry you, have more babies or get other dogs, that’s all i’ve ever wanted since the day we met.”

enywayz u two r dating,, a g a i n

spooning half of the time during ur last few weeks of pregnancy, but the boys come over frequently n for some reason jeongin is always bringing presents?? its cute but u guys RLY didn’t need anymore toys for the baby

u guys r just cuddling n he’s got one hand on ur bump before ur like

“ow,, fuck that hurt.”

“hey don’t swear around the baby!”

u just suppose it’s a hard kick since the baby had been active a lot recently n the pains had been occurring often

kkami is very cuddly today n he’s giving u kisses

hyunjin lowkey jealous cause kkami doesn’t ever give him kisses like that ⸜( ⌓̈ )⸝

yall ever seen the thing where dogs know pregnant people the best n they can like SENSE something goin on??

well kkami was on it

baby kkami is sniffing u n just restless in ur lap n its a lil weird cause kkami is ALWAYS sleeping or sitting still cause kkami has turned as lazy as u n hyunjin

u have this feeling but instead u just tell hyunjin u gotta pee :P

newsflash: u didnt n as soon as u got up, boom, theres ur water breaking and running down ur leg

“it feels gross.”

ur literally whining about ur pants while a baby is coming out of ur ... hooha 😳 n hyunjin is freaking out

he’s rushing around the rooms n making sure everything is in the bag and nothing gets left behind

last thing on his mind is changing ur clothes

though he does, putting u in his baggy sweatshirt and a pair of his shorts

hes freaking out lets be honest the thought of u giving birth is fuckin scary

hyunjin is so out of it and spaced out while ur cool n talking normally with pauses everytime theres a contraction

“aish, why are you so worried? i’m the one that should be worried!!”

ur not cool after an u hit the four hours in labor mark

u do not want to be t o u c h e d

touching u is off limits ur so sweaty n ur body feels like its crumbling u cannot deal with someone holding ur hand or holding u

hyunjin just sits there

hes kinda in a different realm while he stares at the clock on the wall

hes so ready to meet the baby but apparently ur body was exactly 4 centimetres not ready :(

hes just trying to distract u by talking with the boys n his other friends, all of the face timing to talk to the parents to be 🥺

yall r wrapping up a call with jeongin when u have the built up pressure feeling again

he doesn’t even explain to jeongin hes so quickly to hang up n ask u whats wrong

“i— it feels like i have to push.”

he’s already pressing the pretty lil white button on ur bed for the nurses n doctors

they confirm that u indeed r ready to push and that the baby is in position

hyunjin trying to take a peek WHAT A WEIRDO

yall hearing ur baby has a head full of hair and u just give hyunjin this look

like WTF no wonder why u had so much heartburn its because of ur fuckin rapunzel baby daddy

here comes the cries, loud n u just heard the quietest sob from beside u which was hyunjin

“it’s a baby boy, congrats!!”

his lil puppy baby boy 🥺

he had a lil pout like his daddy n his brown locks on top of his head

it was kinda creepy how similar they looked

anyways u dont care ur lil boy is p e r f e c t and nobody could dare tell yall different

u would disagree anyways because thats ur lil pouty baby boy n hes so cute 🥺

“we got a pretty good break-up story right? one for the books.”

he’s got baby boy in his arms bundled up but that doesn’t stop u from smacking his arm before kissing him quickly

“yea, we do.”

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fakeloveaskblog · 3 years

Note

Greetings from the void, Remington Siest, I have been summoned in your stead—

Oh, it's you! We've already met! Right! Uh, Remus's nonbinary demon friend again, this time coming from the shadowy corners in your room that you never look to. My apologies for that little scare, it's my day job you see, and someone else did summon me to you; old habits die hard, yadda yadda. How have you been? How are you liking that Raccoon plushie I sent?

Now, as for what's been requested of me *sounds of paper shuffling* hmm, ok, yeah, that's easy! Remus adores you, can confirm! Both him and Janus love having you as a friend and while I cannot speak on Remus'd behalf on the matter I can say that Janus is absolutely smitten with you (on a romantic sense) beyond a shadow of a doubt! He doesn't and will never only want you for your body, or leave you if you were to reject any advances he may yet put forth, so you can rest easy on that issue!

Oh. *hears what Remy has to say to their summoner before the message sents* Oh my. *starts to panic* Seems things are worse than I thought. I have. No idea what to say that wouldn't make this any worse! Where's the person who cheers you up and sents you nice text messages when you need it?! Ah, guess if they're not here this falls to me until they do get here? Uh, darn the timer's running out, um.

Remy… you are amazing and a great person and your friends love you for you, and you alone, not just your body, you! (Remus is ace for crying out loud!) Other than the obvious… now, we don't have time to unpack all of that, but…! *quickly sents a link to a social media app on Remy's phone* So. *John Mulaney voice* Hey, do you want me to kill that guy for you? Because it sounds like he sucks and I would totally kill that guy for you!

(U!Virgil, emotional abuse)

Remy: "Oh girl I am loving the raccoon! I sewed him a lil like hoodie so now he like reminds me even more of my boyf. I have-"

They forced in a sharp breathe through their teeth while their whole body trembled from pain. The plushie was pressed close to their chest as they laid in bed. All the blinds were rolled down because any and all light would bring them a migraine right now.

"I haven't like....been doing too hot...I...It's like....a lot right now"

They took a few moments to really listen to your message. (How good that all demon messages came with an automatic playback function)

"...Jan does seem so sweet...and Rem makes me feel all warm...maybe you’re right" They buried their face into the soft fur of the plushie "I want Jan to like hold me like all the time. He's so soft"

(A part of them still felt doubt. Sweet guys had left them before. They tried to press the doubt deep deep down until they couldn’t hear it anymore)

"I really hope Jan like texts me about hanging out soon. Like shopping or eating at some resturant or like going out walking or whatever. I just wanna like talk to him. He seems like tots a good listener right? Would be like good to vent to I guess...I kinda want to...I trust him. I think....I shouldn’t vent....I shouldn’t”

The door opened. The small amount of light coming in made them whimper and hide down under the blanket. Virgil came in. He hunched down by the bed.

“You feeling any better?”

“Bitch look at me. I’m dying more than a 70′s fashion trend!! Oh woe me!”

He kissed them on the nose before taking out a pill from one of the medicine bottles on their bedside table. Remy immediately tensed up.

If they took that pill then eventually the bottle would be empty and Virgil would have to pay for another and they wouldn’t have any way to make it up to him because they were useless and couldn’t work and could barely even be used properly and he would probably tell them himself how horrible of a burden they were and they were probably supposed to refuse or he would get mad and-

“You need it” He had a soft look in his eyes.

“I’m fine babe!” They spat out in panic.

Virgil grabbed onto their jaw and forced their mouth open. The back of their head got pressed down into the mattress. It hurt. They knew he would just sigh back how Everything hurt to them if they said anything. They grabbed onto his wrist to try and force him away, they couldn’t. He wasn’t strong but they were very weak.

He pressed the pill down into the back of their mouth. “Swallow” He kept their mouth open until they did as told. “Good. Was that really hard” He muttered sarcastically.

Their whole body was still so tense it ached “Please babe you just sounded like a laughably pathetic daddy dom”

Virgil fiddled with his hoodie strings like he always did when he got flustered “I Uh didnt’ mean to. Gross. Eh. Dinner’s almost ready by the way”

“Don’t burn the stove down” They teased.

“Shut up you smartass”

“You wish”

“Idiot” He said jokingly before kissing them. He left to check so the stove hadn’t actually burned down.

Remy painstakingly turned to look at you. They pressed the plushie closer. The medicine started to make them drowzy. It did that sometimes.

“My boyfriend doesn’t suck...he’s sweet. so sweet” They mumbled out “Most days he’s so sweet. Like today. And on bad days he just like doesn’t lie. He just says the truth..he gets so anxious about me leaving him....isn’t that like kinda romantic...him being so desperate for me to not leave he just...he just says stuff...and yells...and.....and it’s sweet. He’s so sweet”

They kind of wished Virgil would always be either sweet or honest. It made them so stressed to never know how they had to act. At least their dad never made them stressed like that. He was always angry. That made it easy

Remy gripped onto the stuffie harder. They hated when their brain made connections between his boyfriend and-

“He loves me. He just like loves me so much. All that stuff that sounds bad it’s either ‘cause he’s trying to make me stay, like I would leave or someting, or- or ‘cause it’s true”

....But....But they’d thought the whole thing about how no one else would want them except for their body was true...but if Janus didn’t....then it wasn’t true....Remy couldn’t help but wonder if-

The door opened again. Virgil came in with 2 bowls of black bean soup. The silly wondering was quickly forced away from their thoughts.

He sat down on the bed next to them and set the bowls onto the bed table they had for bedridden days. He gently put his hands on their back and neck to help them sit up. When they whimpered he kissed them.

“I’m not hungry” Remy muttered.

“Beanie you are”

They could eat on their own but they didn’t say no when he used the spoon to feed them. It made them feel pampered and it made him feel needed. Double win.

“Babe this tastes horrible. just saying as like a warning” They said after finishing half the bowl.

“Like you could do any better” He pressed a playful kiss to their forehead.

“Oh yeah definitely! I just put the ingredient in! And then the like water! and then it’s done! Easy!!”

“Woooow. Wish I’d thought of that”

They smiled “Yeah that’s why you’ve got dick for brain. Bitch”

He simply snapped his finger into their forehead in reply “Wanna watch a horror movie?”

Remy got bored by horror movies and Virgil easily got anxious by them even though he loved them so really he was if they wanted to make out and cuddle to avoid looking at the film.

“You akready know I want to”

They didn’t look which movie he picked. They’d already cuddled up to his side and pressed their head to his chest. He moved his arms around them so he could eat his soup while the movie started.

It was so nice. They could hear his heartbeat through his hoodie. He was so sweet. They were so horrible.

They didn’t deserve it. They didn’t deserve it. They didn’t deserve it.

#thanks for the ask!!! that must have taken you some time to write <3 #ask #remy sanders #unsympathetic virgil #sanders sides #obsessed with how your ask makes the implication that remy has a tumblr

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eivorsjawline · 3 years

Text

WARNING: tw food descriptions and the consumption of food and alcohol, smut...

You and Eivor join one another for a feast. Eivor begins to make moves on you and you begin to pick them up. However, the moment is short when Randvi distrupts the both of you. Eivor returns to meet you in the bedroom feeling defeated, the night turns hot and steamy.

See below: Stonehenge itself, as depicted in Valhalla.

Chapter 3: SOS

Readers POV

The sun began to set and I heard a loud ringing noise in the distance.

“Sounds like it's time for a feast. Shall we join them?” Eivor said holding an arm out for me to grab onto.

I could feel Eivor’s bicep bulge through the layers of clothes she had on. She knew exactly what she was doing. Interest sparked my mind and I began to wonder what lies underneath all the armor and fur.

Eivor led me back to the longhouse where settlers from all parts of the world grouped together to indulge in good food and drink. Music played while laughter and chatter drowned out the tune. Fresh berries and grapes lined the wooden benches and barrels of mead sat not too far from them. The aroma of a stew cooking filled my nostrils.

I let go of Eivor’s arm and she sat down next to me with a mug full of ale. Watching Eivor’s plump lips press against the mug our eyes latched onto one another. Quickly looking away I began to dig into the food in front of me. It had been so long since I last ate anything.

There was a different taste to everything, a fresher one. Untouched by any chemicals that are pumped into the air and soil like the time I truly come from.

“Try this…” Eivor grabbed an exotic berry, getting a firm grip on the sides of my jaw. Opening up my mouth, she placed the berry on the tip of my tongue as the juice ran down from my bottom lip down her thumb.

After chewing and savoring the sweet taste of both the berry and Eivor’s flesh finally, I swallowed. Eivor only gave me a presumptuous smirk, unphased and unapologetic for invading my personal space. Fortunately, I didn't mind one bit.

Being sexy is effortless to her.

She spoke to me with no words. Innate animal instinct and a magnetic attraction began to form between the two of us. Just as I was trying to hold back and deny my deep craving for her, she sucked off the juice that I spilled on her thumb from my mouth. A not so subtle tease coming from her.

Eivors POV

Our flirtatious charades were cut short by an intoxicated Randvi slamming her mug on the bench in front of me.

“Eivor, I need to speak with you… That is if you can find the time.” Randvi said, her eyes glancing over to [y/n].

Gods, not right now...

[y/n] pulled away, distancing herself from me and Randvi with a suspicious look on her face. I excused myself, and Randvi followed just behind me. Finally, we were cutting the corners to the alliance room.

The air grew thicker but the chatter of the longhouse quieted.

“Really, Eivor? You don't even know her and she’s replacing me… I sacrificed everything for you, I gave my everything to you! Your belt buckle couldn’t have waited just a little longer?” Randvi exasperated.

Leaning against the wall, I couldn't think of anything to say. The wound was still fairly fresh but she was wrong.

My body knows her and calls out for her like no one ever before. I couldn't explain the prophecies Valka told me of, it would just hurt Randvi more to know that she's not the one and never was.

“No one is replacing you, Randvi! We haven't even done anything together. We both know our relationship ran its course. How dare you pull me out here like that?” I said with a stern voice, my hands clenched.

“The way you look at her… You never looked at me like that.” Randvi said, her voice weakening.

The awkward silence grew and I didnt know what to say. Knowing she was right, I still tried to defend myself.

“Randvi, I did love you… I-“

Before I could say anything else, Randvi pulled the pledge knife out of the map and chucked it at the wall, barely missing me.

“With that knife we created this. I helped build you, and I will never let you forget that.” Randvi uttered, standing tall before storming off.

Though she was clearly on the verge of tears, I know she would never let me see her weak.

I just hurt everyone around me. Sigurd, my people… Randvi.

Readers POV

After everyone left the longhouse, I found myself alone in Eivor’s bedroom. Feeling conflicted, I longed for nothing more than the silence and the sound of a flickering candle next to my bed side.

What am I doing? I knew this was a bad idea, i should have never involved myself this deeply with the people here.

Eivor…

Randvi, why did she look at me like that? I felt so disgusted with myself afterwards. Letting my loneliness consume me, my anxiety began to tell me I didn't belong here and that I was merely trespassing.

I sat up in bed to see an exhausted Eivor standing by the doorway. She looked disheveled, like she had seen a ghost. I knew the tired expression on her face was not from a long day but the unwanted conversation with Randvi. She sat down on the bed with me and began to take off her cloak, throwing her boots on the ground.

“Eivor… What happened?” I nudged at her shoulder.

Eivor turned and looked at me, her bright blue eyes piercing through my soul as if she was telling me how exhausted she was. Tired of people, tired of explaining herself, and tired of everything that came with being a Jarl. She collapsed onto my chest and I held her there for a moment, stroking her hair and comforting her.

Eivor wrapped her arms around my waist tightly, playing with the strings on my dress.

“Being here with you feels like home to me. Come here, closer.” Eivor spoke to me with soft words.

My stomach sank, and my heart began to beat rapidly.

Eivor grabbed my chin and pulled it closer to hers, giving me a soft tender kiss, the taste of alcohol lingering on her lips. Her rough hand grabbed the back of my neck for support, pulling me in for more. With her other hand, her scarred fingers began to trickle down my arms and back up to the side of my ribs, gripping me tight with frustration.

I let out a subdued moan, unable to contain myself. She began to make her way down my neck with kisses and licks and then back up to suck on my earlobes.

“Eivor…” I said with another moan.

I felt her breath on my baby hairs, and my skin began to form goosebumps. Losing all control I ran my fingers down her back as she continued to kiss me wherever on my body she pleased. Pulling the collar of my dress down she began to place kisses on my chest. I could feel my underwear begin to soil and the ability to control the moans escaping my mouth weakened.

So many questions unanswered, what the hell am I doing?

My mind said one thing but my body said another.

“Eivor... I want you.” I whispered in her ear.

Without hesitation Eivor began to pull off the grey tunic she was in, disclosing her pale scarred flesh. My eyes stayed put on her chest and how the fleshy nubs on her bosom hardened.

“Let me see you, elsker.” Eivor said with a tug at my dress.

I stood up and began to untie the strings of my dress in front of Eivor, pulling the first layer off and throwing it to the ground. Eivor watched with careful eyes, sitting on the bed with spread legs and an exposed chest as I stood there in my last layer.

“Take it off for me, I want to watch.” Eivor instructed me, eyes locked onto me.

Undoing the last string on my tunic, I pulled the cloth over my head, holding the fabric up to my chest for a second before dropping it to the ground. My bare breasts were now on display for Eivor to see.

Finally, down to the last item of clothing on my body. I slowly started to pull down the fine silk underwear I was wearing until they dropped to the ground.

“Enough teasing, love. I want you all to myself. Right now.” Eivor said, almost breathless.

Eivor was unable to compose herself anymore, her breathing began to stagger. She stood up next to me, looking down into my eyes and started impatiently unbuckling her trousers. Leaning in for more wet kisses, she started to suck on my neck leaving a wet bruised spot. Moving downwards onto my chest sucking on my hard nipples, her hands with a firm grip on my ass.

I grabbed hold of Eivor’s blonde hair and let her lose herself in my body. On her knees now she started to massage my thighs, leaving a trail of kisses on my stomach. Eivor cupped my womanhood with her other hand making me tense up, removing it to reveal a sticky wet mess I made on her.

“Already soaked and I’ve barely started with you.” Eivor murmured, standing back up to lift me with ease.

My legs wrapped around her naked waist, still not hesitating to give me long deep kisses. Laying me down on the bed softly, her scarred hands grabbed a hold of both of my breasts and massaged my nipples, placing both in her mouth and sucking.

Eivor placed her knee in between my thighs, teasing me softly. I latched onto her and began grinding against her skin up and down, leaving a soaked spot on her leg. Her breasts swayed in front of me and I took a nub in my mouth and sucked, cupping it then releasing it.

I could tell by the expressions on Eivor’s face how bad she wanted me, the way I threw myself at her turning her on to the point of no return. As I left kisses and hickeys on her breasts, her breaths grew short and heavy. Still grinding my cunt on Eivors leg and prodding at her nipples, I could hear her mumble my name.

“Eivor… I want you so bad.” I let out a moan.

The sexual frustration of watching her fuck me with her eyes since I got here was soon to be released.

I opened my legs wide for her and she started to kiss my inner thighs, her hand teasing around my wet cunt. Getting a good grip onto my hips she began to place her hot mouth over my clit. Her experienced tongue made me arch my back and rock back and forth in an attempt to fuck her face.

“Fuck, [y/n] you taste so good.” She said, the pretty view of her head shooting up between my legs.

Eivor’s tongue kept a steady pace and slowly picked up as I held a fist full of her hair. Unable to control my moans and my eyes sealing shut, I held my other hand over my mouth in an attempt to muffle the sound.

I felt Eivor start to fuck me with her tongue, burying it in me as deep as possible, her moaning noises making my cunt vibrate.

While Eivor ate me like it was her last meal, her fingers explored my dripping wet spot, massaging my lips and teasing my hole, making me squirm beneath her.

“Oh, please Eivor I need to feel you inside of me!” I said with a fretful tone.

Eivor pulled her head up from in between my thighs, placing sloppy kisses all over my body until ultimately letting me taste myself on her tongue. The blonde grabbed the side of my neck looking profoundly into my eyes. My mouth reached for her thumb to suck on and a hungry expression fell upon her face, one that I had never seen before. She stroked the molars in the back of my mouth before sticking her long fingers down my throat almost making me gag.

“Gods, you’re so fucking filthy. You belong to me now...” Eivor whispered in my ear, her fingers still playing with me.

“All of me is yours… Eivor. Im yours…” I replied, trying to catch my breath.

Eivor slowly stuck a long slender finger inside of me, inserting from the very tip of her finger pad down to her knuckle. She watched me closely as I threw my head back in awe of how good the length of her felt. She pulled in and out of me until she stopped, her finger beginning to curl.

Keeping a steady pace inside me, I grabbed onto one of her soft breasts and started playing with the hard lump. Eivor let out a tender moan, her finger digging deeper into me.

Moving on to two fingers now, she began pumping me hard and fast. The immoral sounds of my wet pussy and her knuckles clashing filled the room. Removing my hand from her breast, I reached both hands out and gripped onto the back of her neck bracing for impact.

Looking down between our bodies and seeing her long fingers pump into me with vigor and force, I started to make a creamy mess all over her. I felt released and satisfied with how Eivor filled me. Slowing her pace down, she pulled out and placed her fingers on the tip of my tongue.

“Be a good girl and clean yourself off me, love.” The blonde murmured.

I stuck her soiled fingers in my mouth and my tongue made circles around the collision of our dna.

“It's your turn, my wolf.” I said sliding underneath Eivor’s body.

She spread her legs for me and grabbed onto the wooden bedpost. I took in the view of Eivor’s dripping cunt and tall lean body standing over me. Prepping my seat for her with my mouth hanging open, she didn’t hesitate to sit down.

Placing my mouth over her labia, I began to lick her up and down, not yet touching her clit. I savored the taste and she arched her back releasing a deep moan. My hands massaged her thighs and then at last I placed all my attention onto her throbbing clit.

“Oh fuck, just like that!” Eivor demanded, impatience in her voice for me to get her off.

The blonde began to buck and ride my face, her hands releasing the bedpost and now taking hold of my hair. Her firm grip and the heaviness of her body left me more determined to make her finish in my mouth.

I hummed and moaned into Eivor’s warm cunt, making her squirm and buck harder on my face. Listening as Eivors moans became heavier and she tried to catch her breath, the taste of her bittersweet pride coated my tongue and I swallowed every bit.

Eivor stopped so she could catch her breath before pulling off of me and laying down flat on the bed. We made eye contact and she just smiled at me before we chuckled at one another.

Though it was our first time making love, it felt like we had known each other's bodies for the entirety of our lives.

“You handle me so well. Come here, my little drengr.” Eivor said, before giving me one last passionate kiss.

Eivors POV

Damn, who knew her little body could take me so well?

Laying flat on the bed, I watched as my lover stood up and attempted to fix her hair. Eyes fixating on every curve of her body, her skin still dripping with sweat from the intense love we just made.

I was already missing her warm embrace and the feeling of her silky skin against mine, the faint sweet fragrance that radiated off her body.

Finding her way back to my bed, I lifted a thin cover up for her to join me once again. The cute smile she gave me made me melt inside. Facing the wall she laid down with me and I placed my arms around her, hugging her from behind. The feeling of her ass rubbing against my naked body, as if tempting me for another round.

I know what position I'm putting her in next time…

A sleepy drengr interrupted my dirty thoughts,

“Eivor, did you really mean it… Am i yours? Are you mine?”

With every ache in my body I meant it.

I propped my head up on my hand,

“If you allow it, I would take great pride in having you by my side.” I replied back, stroking her hair from behind.

I felt the little drengr adjust herself and turn her head towards me.

“Eivor, I would love that, but…”

My heart skipped a beat.

“I feel like there's more I need to learn about you.”

Though I was disappointed, I brushed it off giving her an understanding nod.

“You’re right, let's talk tomorrow i will explain everything. I promise... For now just sleep with me, here in my arms.” I said letting out a big sigh.

I'm gonna tell her everything tomorrow, if she is the prophecy she will understand. Right?

She turned around snuggling up to me and I watched as her eyes slowly closed.

I’ll cherish this moment forever...

#fem eivor #female eivor #ac valhalla #fan fiction #writers on tumblr #eivor x reader #assasins creed #assasinscreed

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joontier · 4 years

Text

The King’s Guard | the minis i.

summary: Seokjin leans forward, “Your father has fought well and there is no greater honor than to die for the safety of your countrymen. I am glad he has a son to continue the legacy of your family. Stand, Jung Jungkook, for I know your father’s soul is now at peace.” The man complies and speaks, “Long live King Seokjin, long live the capital!” The rest of the two hundred men follow suit. The citizens join in on the cheering but your eyes linger on the new captain and the faded scar on his left cheek.

pairings: kim seokjin x reader ; jeon jungkook x reader ; min yoongi x reader

rating: R | genre: established relationship! au, smut, fluff, the wedding night ™

warnings: no prep here whatsoever, two virgins at it for the first time

word count: 1.1k

g/n: yall im sorry chapter five is taking so long :-((( please accept this drabble as compensation i just had to get this out of my unclean soul jdsfkjasdklfasjdf p.s one didnt get to climax bUT then again they didnt exactly get proper sex ed during those times hngnhghg p.p.s. @mintseesaw HELLO BABE IM SORRY FOR DROPPING THIS OUT OF NOWHERE BUT A GAL’S GOTTA DO WHAT A GAL’S GOTTA DO

The King’s Guard - Masterlist || navi.

The King’s Guard | the minis i.

With your wedding ceremony over, you and Seokjin retire to his hanok in silence. It was awfully quiet, save the birds’ chirping with the cold breeze of the night. It wasn’t that type of silence that made you want to shrink and disappear, yet it was that type of quietude that was caused by anticipation, ultimately waiting for something that was already bound to happen, yet not one of you wishes to be vocal about it.

Even with the sheer red veil covering your face, you choose not to meet your husband’s eyes as he slides his bedroom door open. He lets you walk forward and explore the room for a while. You can;t really think of anything else, mindlessly wandering around his room. Your head is clouded with anticipation that you don’t realize Seokjin already standing beside you.

Seokjin lifts the veil slowly, and as you finally make eye contact, he lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding until now.

“It’s alright, my love. I’ll take care of you,” Seokjin assures pulling you into an embrace. For a while, the both of you just stand there in each other’s arms, letting yourself calm down as you listen to the steady beating of Seokjin’s heart. You weren't sure what has gotten you on edge the whole day - and it’s not as if you hadn't been with Seokjin during the better years of your life.

Seokjin takes cognizance of your apprehension - he always does, like every small gesture does not go unnoticed. Sometimes, you wonder if he knows you better than you do yourself. “We don’t have to do this.” Seokjin pulls away, leaving you at arm’s length from each other.

Ever so gently, he cups your jaw in his palm, pulling you a little closer as he places a lingering kiss on your forehead. You are thankful for the gesture, a small smile gracing your lips in gratitude. This time you feel more secure, knowing that Seokjin would never do anything that would hurt you.

You place your hand on top of his, squeezing his larger hand a little to show your affirmation. “I trust you,” you whisper, leaning further towards the warmth of his palm. When you look up at him, hesitation is evident in his features. Unfortunately for him, the growing tent in his pants doesn't seem to agree with his uncertainty.

Turning your head a little, you plant a kiss on his palm, never taking your eyes off him with a fervent hope he gets the message. Seokjin takes a deep breath at the sight, testing how far his self-control might reach.

“You’re going to let me take care of you tonight, my Queen?” Seokjin whispers against the shell of your ear, effectively sending a shiver running through the length of your spine. You give him a shy nod in reply and Seokjin no longer wastes any time, nipping gently at your ear before attaching his lips on your neck.

He finally removes the heavy golden pins on your head, letting your hair fall in small waves just below your chest. Seokjin continues to untie the knots on your ceremonial garments, inhaling sharply when he sucks on a particular spot just below your jaw.

Tilting your head to give him more access, Seokjin’s lips never leave your skin until he finally slides your jeogori from your shoulders. You take his pausing an opportunity to undress him as well. With shaky hands, you reach out to tug his durumagi off. Seokjin chuckles as he sees you fumble with the knot just above his waist, offering to give you a hand.

Sighing in defeat, you let him do the work. As soon as he discards his clothes, you pull him closer, connecting your lips in a feverish kiss. You’ve never done this before, let alone kiss him this fervently. You and Seokjin were always discreet when it came to displays of affection - a quick peck on the cheek when you were left alone in the garden of blush or a small hug when no one was watching.

Maybe that’s what caused you to be rigid the whole day - to know that something was to happen yet unsure of what to do, or at the very least, expect. You had never been this nervous around Seokjin, wanting your first night as a married couple most delightful. Disdainfully, your desire to make your husband happy is seemingly backfiring, giving you more anxiety than confidence.

Now though, you realized you were most comfortable and secure around your now-husband, so there was absolutely nothing to worry about. His actions are starting to get driven by haste, this time his fingers are thumbing the knot on your skirt. “Why do you have to wear so many layers of clothes?” your husband huffs, brows furrowed in concentration.

As he finally rids you of your clothes, Seokjin gets back to kissing you, pulling you closer than ever before, if that was still possible. His hands start travelling southward, the slightly calloused pads of his fingers trailing down against the expanse of your back, ultimately landing on the globe of your ass.

He gives them a squeeze, making you gasp at the sudden brazenness of his actions and he uses your surprise as an opportunity to hook his hands under your thighs to lift you off the ground and carry you to his bed.

Laying you gently on the futon, he lays a hand on your inner thighs, gently spreading your legs apart so he can position himself properly between them. “Are you ready?” You can tell he’s keeping himself restrained, cock even twitching in anticipation. Your heart soars, grateful that the heavens have blessed you with a husband like Seokjin - one who puts your comfort first before his.

“I’m ready,” you affirm, nodding twice at him. Seokjin inhales sharply, taking his length in his hands, letting the angry tip press tentatively against your core. Slowly, he breaches your entrance, the both of you shivering as he finally seats his cock up to the hilt.

When the slight pain subsides, you give him a go-signal, urging him to start moving. Your husband complies quickly, pulling out slowly and pushing back in just as languidly. Seokjin savors how your walls clench deliciously around his cock, and at that moment, he decides nothing could ever feel more heavenly than this.

He gets to a pace that brings him to his high shortly. Seokjin feels his balls tighten, and with one last snap of his hips, he cums, body shuddering above you. You wonder if you were supposed to reciprocate what Seokjin felt just now, but you don’t mind, if it brings your husband to elation, then it is enough for you. Besides, there will be plenty of that next time. Surely.

Seokjin, who’s still panting heavily, collapses beside you, pulling the covers over the both of you. “Next time, wear less clothes, so I don’t finish quickly, my love.”

#bts smut #bangtanhq #ficswithluv #btsgoldnet #btswritingcafe #btsguild #hyunglinenetwork #bangtanarmynet #bayanihanboost #kim seokjin #seokjin smut

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romeulusroy · 4 years

Text

Sheyn Punim (Alfie Solomons Oneshot)

((PEAKY BLINDERS SEASON 4/5 SPOILERS))

Character/s: Alfie, Ollie mention

Word Count: 1,405

Tag List: @dontdowhatisayandnobodygetshurt @myriadimagines @lilyswritings @encounterthepast @writerdream22 @death-of-a-mermaid @lotsoffandomrecs @woahitslucyylu @obsessedunicorn24 @thedarkqueenofavalon @fangirlsarah16 @theshelbyclan @captivatedbycillianmurphy @creativemayhems @soleil-dor @thegirlwithoutaname87 @fifty-shadesof-tommyshelby @riana-jannat

A/N: Just some fluff 💕 Well, as close as I can get :P I'm not the best at writing sappy things, and I'm a sucker for a dark metaphor, but I've had this idea for a while :) Still a lil nervous. Fluff is hard, but I'm givin it a try anyways!!! I've only ever spoken these words in Yiddish, never written them, and I know how Google can be with translations, so I might've made a few mistakes!!! Anyways, I hope you like it loves! Feedback is always appreciated 💜💖💜

Gif Credit: @bennskywalker :)

FIC MASTERLIST PART ONE. / PART TWO. / PART THREE.

WANNA BE ADDED TO THE TAG LIST?

Hand sculpted, you were sure. Come together by the minds of a thousand artists, careful not to smear or smudge, cautious to muddy, to rid the world of all his perfect imperfections. The harsh lines drawn across his forehead, the deeply carved creases of his eyes, a tight lipped smile shaded. To the untrained eye this would have been off-putting, jarring, even severe. These features would have been unlikable, an afterthought in comparison to others, but that's what they wanted, what they needed. To be undermined, overlooked. It wasn't cutting in the way that captured the attention of younger eyes. A jaw as sharp as blade, eyes piercing, the pointed tip of a pencil resting in confident hands. It wasn't soft in a sweet, endearing kind of way. Naive and freckled, lulled by oil paints, by grand brush strokes and a starry-eyed sense of wonder. He was another medium, another material, the kind that went unloved and underappreciated if you didnt look close enough, if you didn't appreciate the right features. You might have missed it yourself if you hang taken a closer look. Too many passed by without a second thought.

That's all he ever needed, though.

Sheyn punim. His beautiful face cupped in your hands, in need of a soft touch. His skin worn, aged with experience, the way paper yellows and crumbles if it's not preserved. Tracing his cheek, tapping his nose, kissing his forehead. Waking him when the sun rays fail to, when the bags under his eyes wain, growing hollow. Urging him to bed, to rest, but always insistent on spending time with you. You only had so much. Face to face. Somehow you always ended up here. An arm lazily dropped across your waist, the blankets and sheets twisted around your bodies after a restless night. This was your favorite version of him. The clay of him malleable, clumsy even, not yet hardened by the day ahead. The side of his face squashed by his pillow, a small snore mumbling through him. It would have been laughable, really. A man who emptied the streets before him, who could have made men bow to their feet and kiss his shoe as if he were God himself, sleeping like a baby, so full of coos.

Matók. Sweet. Your sweetness. You weren't sure how it happened, how he became yours, and you his. When you started belonging to one another only that you were hand in hand, never straying too far from one another. Mindlessly playing with his rings, trying them on for yourself. He'd get you a ring of your own one day. Big and clunky, like his own, like the one you'd taken, refusing to take off. Not the prettiest, but, then again, neither was he. An eye for the odd, the obscure, finding beauty where others turned away. Falling for the scraggly alley cats, plucking weeds in place of flowers, joyous when the fog fell across the soil and not a soul could be seen. Mukhl. Forgiving. Forgiving with your love, giving it up absentmindedly. Forgiving with him, his actions, all the terrible things he was capable of. He wasn't a piece of art, but a weapon of mass destruction. He wouldn't have to lift a finger to take a life, and yet, in your arms, he was anything but.

Sheyn balibt. Beautiful beloved. To be reminded of love, as foreign to him as a godless man. To be feared was to be expected, anticipated even. But loved? That he wasn't ready for. And yet, he couldn't picture his life without it, without you. Washing the blood from his hands, the worry from his bones, all of it slipping off the same way his coat did, hanging it where it could never touch you. An abundance of kisses in the doorway, excitement dripping from your words, grabbing him as if he may slip and fall. Talk of your day, he wanted to hear of every second. You made the most mundane infectious. Able to relax, to sink into the cushions with you, his day sugar coated, lightened where it needed to be. He never wanted you to worry. Meyn lebn. My life. Yours. His. It wasn't his actions that affected him anymore. Every decision he made, it had to be an act of protection, all of his proclamation of love to you.

Even if it meant hurting himself.

Narish. Foolish, the both of you. Thinking you could live in a bubble. Shut the world out until it was just the two of you. It didn't work like that, not in his business, not in this kind of world. You felt it before you knew, before Ollie came to you, hat in hand. An instinct, a pain without cause. It had to be him. It always was. Not a lie, but a half truth. Softening reality for the sake of a smile. You'd always known though. Hidden in his office where none could see, none could touch, the door thin, the walls begging for word to get out, to be free. Hearing too much, more than you ever asked for. Your Alfie, believing himself a statue, a keeper of secrets, stone faced, forgetting how effortlessly you could read him. Narish mentsch. Foolish man. You wished he wasn't so foolish, so stubborn, that he could be as vulnerable as he was in those sunrise moments.

Refusing to see you. Lebedik. Alive. You couldn't believe it. Your love alive, but refusing to see you, as if he were already dead. . . Hidden away for reasons you'd never understand, ones a letter would never do justice. Back and forth, your angr, your fear, bleeding into the page. Ollie could say nothing, ordered to keep his whereabouts to himself. Tried to follow, a few times out of desperation, but he was good at his job. You lost him instantly. Every time after that, he always promised, at the bottom of the page, it wouldn't be forever. Egoistish. Selfish. Selfish, vain, childish reasons. A bullet in that sheyn punim, in his beautiful face, that was no longer beautiful. You weren't sure how long it would last. Neither was he. The healing process took longer than either of you wanted. Once inseparable, now you were world's apart. You didn't blame him. Alfie had his reasons for everything, you understood. You just missed him. You missed holding him, being held, looking into his eyes and knowing everything would be okay no matter how uncertain life felt.

Bahaltn. Hidden. He needed to see you, to hear your voice, his cool exterior finally cracking, crumbling. Weeks, months, a lifetime, it felt without you. But he couldn't be seen. He couldn't bear the thought of you turning away from him, disgusted by the man before you. So, he stayed in the dark. The curtains drawn, lights off, safe in shadows. Ollie refused to tell you where you were going or why, only that you needed to come with him. You heard him before you saw him, as you often had in the past, swearing up a storm at nothing in particular. Nostalgic for him, his voice, hating that you were becoming so used to sleeping alone, that you were forgetting all the littlest ways in which he brightened your day. Pushing through the door, into the dark, waiting for you.

Brushing your hand through his hair, fussing the same way that always annoyed him, a last resort to get him out of bed. Still asleep, but stirring, taking your hand in his, pressing it to his chest. Thankful for that heartbeat every day. Getting closer to him, your noses almost touching, catching him open his eyes, sneaking a quick glance at you, pretending all along. You never wanted him to be in the dark like that again, to hide out of shame. Balibt. Favorite. Your favorite person, your favorite smile, your favorite face. The hardened scar tissue growing, settled, streaked across his cheek and forehead. The result of living through what no one was expected to. You didn't see what he did, what he examined in the mirror when he was self conscious, what he tried to avoid looking at in reflective surfaces. There was nothing wrong with it, though. You loved him just the same. No matter what he looked like, he would always be beautiful to you. He would always be yours, and you his. Ale mol.

#writing #alfie solomons #alfie solomons drabble #alfie solomons oneshot #peaky blinders #peaky blinders drabble #peaky blinders oneshot #alfie solomons fic #peaky blinders fic #alfie solomons x reader #alfie x reader #x reader #drabble #oneshot #gender neutral #gender neutral reader #x gender neutral reader

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pastelwitchling · 4 years

Text

Alex was at his wit’s end, that much was clear.

The airman had been moving nonstop since Max had woken up, trying to find more leads to Nora’s past, to anyone she may have associated with in the year before her capture, to any more Project Shepherd facilities that may have been hidden and what progress those files had encrypted in their databases.

It was time split between his work in the Air Force, and his eyes in a computer or book. It had been months since Alex had stopped really sleeping or eating, and weeks since they’d been stuck with dead ends. Needless to say, Alex didnt seem to be used to failure, and try as he might to hide it, Michael knew it pained Alex not to be winning.

As he sat at the end of the bunker, Michael kept his eyes on Alex. The airman’s hands turned to fists, and he seemed to barely refrain pounding them on the console when the search results on the screen came back empty. He was working so hard to hide his frustration, but why?

“You good there, Private?” Michael asked, keeping his voice as casual as possible. Alex didn’t seem to hear him the first time, so Michael asked again.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Alex said into his palms as he hunched over in his seat, his face hidden in his hands, his fingers pressed into his eyes as if willing himself to stay awake. He’d forgotten his jacket in his haste to come here, left in his Air Force t-shirt, and as often as Michael raked Alex’s strong arms with his eyes, he knew the airman would’ve been freezing by now.

Michael wanted to tell him that he ought to rest, that he’d done enough, that he’d burn himself out if he didn’t stop... that he would like to take Alex out for dinner. Michael wanted the two of them to rest together.

But as he turned the words over in his head, he realized how ridiculous they sounded and he refrained. Alex wouldn’t listen to Michael anyway, and Michael was sure that the last thing the airman wanted to do was go anywhere with him.

Michael took a step towards Alex regardless, not really knowing what he would say, when Forrest stepped away from his own history books with a sigh. He shrugged his own jacket off, and gently covered Alex with it before plopping down in the seat next to him.

Alex looked up slowly at him, his eyes narrowed and rimmed red as if they hurt too much from staying awake for too long to properly open all the way, and to both Alex and Michael’s shock, Forrest reached over and set his hand in Alex’s hair, softly brushing through the strands with his fingers, as if Alex were a very stressed out kitten. Forrest didn’t look at either of them as he squinted at the screen, studying the laid out map and codes.

Forrest finally huffed and nodded to himself. He stood, and ruffled Alex’s hair once before letting go.

“You need a break,” he said plainly, and held his hand out for Alex to take. “Come on, let’s go grab a bite to eat. I’m starving.”

Alex stared, his brows furrowed slightly in awe, as if he’d seen others cared for and invited to eat, but never thought anyone would make such a simple request of him.

Alex looked down at Forrest’s hand and back up at the historian’s face. He swallowed and nodded slowly.

“Okay,” he said quietly, his voice hoarse from lack of use, and took Forrest’s hand. “Let me just — uh — lock the files.”

“I’ll go start the car,” he said, and Michael could not miss the way his thumb lightly brushed Alex’s fingers before they let go.

When Forrest left the bunker, Michael was still staring at Alex, the files in his hands forgotten.

His jaw, he realized, was clenched too tightly, his hands nearly tearing the papers he was holding. He tossed them onto the table, and left the bunker after Forrest.

The blue-haired nuisance was standing beside his car, fishing something out of his pocket.

“What was that?” he asked when he was sure Alex wouldn’t hear them. “What’re you trying to do?”

Forrest raised a brow at him. “Find my keys?” he said in a questioning tone, though something about his voice told Michael he knew exactly what the cowboy was asking him.

“Don’t play dumb with me,” Michael warned. “I’m not the patient type.”

“You don’t say.”

“Start talking,” he demanded. “What do you want with Alex?”

Forrest huffed a disbelieving chuckle and shook his head at the sky. “What do I want with him? Seriously?”

“He doesn’t need some new guy messing with his feelings, so if you’re trying to cozy him up for something —”

“I’m trying to show him some kindness,” Forrest said, and for a split second, Michael saw something akin to anger flash in the historian’s eyes. It was gone as Michael blinked. “Doesn’t really look like he’s been gettin’ too much of that.”

Michael frowned. He opened his mouth for a retort, to tell Forrest that he recognized that look in his eyes, that he recognized that desire to have Alex, and that he knew Forrest wanted more than just to be Alex’s friend —

But then the bunker door opened, and Alex stepped out, shrugging on Forrest’s jacket. Forrest’s eyes seemed to light up at the sight of the airman, but Michael’s real focus was on Alex himself.

He looked even less rested in the sunlight. The dark circles around his eyes were far more prominent, he looked thinner, he walked with more of a limp, he squinted as if the natural light hurt him, and as he passed Michael to get inside Forrest’s car, he cast Michael a small, weary smile as if it was all he had the energy for.

“I’m trying to show him some kindness. Doesn’t really look like he’s been gettin’ too much of that.”

Michael wondered if Alex would’ve listened to him if he’d told the airman to rest sooner. If Alex would’ve turned him down. If Alex would’ve been happy to hear that Michael cared.

It didn’t matter, Michael realized. For all his imaginings, Forrest had actually done something. Forrest had Alex now, and nothing would change that.

#forrest long #alex manes #michael guerin #malex #forlex #forlex fic #malex one shot #malex fanfic #malex fic #malex fanfiction #roswell new mexico #roswell nm #malex angst #malex fluff #tyler blackburn #michael vlamis

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horansqueen · 4 years

Text

You & Me : chapter 30

A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA

Sequel to AM CONVERSATIONS

CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3 || CHAPTER 4 || CHAPTER 5 || CHAPTER 6 || CHAPTER 7 || CHAPTER 8 || CHAPTER 9 || CHAPTER 10 || CHAPTER 11 || CHAPTER 12 || CHAPTER 13 || CHAPTER 14 || CHAPTER 15 || CHAPTER 16 || CHAPTER 17 || CHAPTER 18 || CHAPTER 19 || CHAPTER 20 || CHAPTER 21 || CHAPTER 22 || CHAPTER 23 || CHAPTER 24 || CHAPTER 25 || CHAPTER 26 || CHAPTER 27 || CHAPTER 28 || CHAPTER 29

NOTES:

-one chapter is her pov, the next is his. -5.1k -im sorry, i never proofread, i hate it. -there WILL be smut. but not only smut. -this is a romance, comedy, smut story. -for the summary, check my MASTERLIST.

- notes: i know its a long chapter but i didnt want to cut the smut scene. sometimes i feel like i go too far with smut but hey, you tell me. also well im slightly disappointed because i didnt really get many notes in the last chapter sooo hopefully this one doesn’t flop? thank you!

if you want to be on the list of blogs i notify when this is updated, just message me :)

requests! : ok so i didnt add everything in the requests but i tried!!!

Chapter 30 : Her chapter

OLIVIA

The room was dark and we remained silent for a while, both lost in our thoughts. I was thinking about what he had asked me, wondering if I was ready to get back into a relationship and somehow, it was driving me insane. Was I ready? Could I just jump back into it and move on? If I did and realized I was not ready, would our relationship end up the way it ended the first time? I felt something twist in my stomach and held my breath as i teared up. All the emotions I had felt during that time apart from him came rushing down, invading my body and confusing me even more. I knew I couldn't go through that a second time, but I also was not sure it had anything to do with the official title we could give each other. In fact, if Niall left again right now, it would probably be just as bad. Thinking about losing him made me grip the sheets of the bed hard and I bit my bottom lip so hard I actually hurt myself. The truth was, I had fallen again. No wait, 'fallen' was not the right word. I never thought being in love gave me the sensation to fall. No, it was the opposite. Being in love made you feel like you flew so high, way over the clouds. The fall, however, could literally break your neck and kill you. That's how I had felt when Niall had broken up with me a year ago. That was what I never wanted to go through ever again. But here I was, laying next to the only man I was ever in love with, the only man I'd ever be in love with, risking my sanity once again. I had it so fucking bad I didn't know how to process everything and if he cut my wings again, who was going to save me this time?

Niall's hand reached for mine that was laying in between us and held it. I squeezed his fingers instead of the sheets and sighed low. How did he do that? How did he calm me down with a simple touch? Why did he have so much control over me, physically and mentally?

"I didn't want to make things awkward between us." he finally talked in a low tone, turning his head my way. "I also don't want to pressure you into anything. Maybe I shouldn't have turned this into sex earlier, in the bath tub but... it was the first way I found to make sure I didn't have a verbal diarrhea of all the things in my mind."

I turned my head his way too and let my eyes roam on his face. I could still see him well but the features I couldn't see in the darkness were engraved in my brain anyway. It was insane the amount of time I had spent watching him and I didn't even care that it sounded so pathetic.

"Why didn't you want to tell me about the thoughts in your head?" I asked in a soft tone.

"Because I don't think you're ready to hear them."

The first thing that came to my mind was to answer him that I was ready but my heart jumped in my chest and I realized he was right. Maybe I was not ready to find out about his deep thoughts, maybe I knew it would either hurt me or stress me even more than I already was.

"I'm sorry." I whispered, feeling myself tear up. "I'm such a mess, I know."

He turned his whole body my way and brought his free hand to my head, slipping his fingers in my hair before moving closer and kissing me gently.

"Don't apologize." he let out against my lips before kissing me again. "No one is blaming you for anything, I promise. You take your time, you take whatever time you need, and I'll be here the whole time, right by your side."

"Why, Niall?" I whispered, blinking a few times before shutting my eyes tight. "Why do you want to wait for me?"

"Because I'm in love with you. Because I can't fucking live without you. Because I'm convinced we're meant to be." he replied quickly but softly. "I've always known we were meant to be. I made a few mistakes but I never stopped loving you, not even a second. And I know I was stupid and selfish but I genuinely thought it was alright because at the end of the road, it was going to be only you and me."

I wanted to smile at the reference from his song but I couldn't. I knew he was a different man but it didn't change the fact that he took me for granted when he broke up with me, and that now that he had lived what he wanted to live, he just wanted me back. I shouldn't be so bitter about it but it was not easy and when his mouth found mine again, I wrapped my arm around his waist, turning to face him, and pulled him closer.

"I want to trust you." I admitted, trying not to cry. "But it's just so hard, Niall. My heart is all in, I hope you know that. But my head... my head remembers. My head won't let me forget."

"I know petal, I know." he whispered, bringing his mouth on mine again to kiss me harder. "I don't want you to forget. I'll wait. I'll wait until you forgive me completely, I'll wait to see if you'll ever want to forgive me at all." He kissed me deeply and i felt a wave of intense love for him wash over me. "I'll wait a few lifetimes if I have to."

We kissed deeper and he pulled me against him, pressing our bodies together as I felt tears on my cheeks. I didn't know why I was so emotional but crying made me feel better. Or maybe it was him. Or a bit of both. We fell asleep together and when I woke up, I was still pressed against him. I brought my lips to his again and he groaned, answer my kiss before letting his mouth run on my jaw and neck.

"We should go hiking today." he proposed in a low tone, making me frown.

The moment we had had the night before was gone but somehow, something still lingered between us, like an emotion or a strong connection, I was not sure.

"Hiking? Yea, okay. And then bungee jumping? Sky diving, perhaps?" I let out ironically, making him laugh.

"I'm talking about hiking, not extreme sports. Just hike up a mountain, a small one!" he quickly added, making me grimace.

"That fat ass of mine didn't grow for no reason, Niall. Sport isn't my thing." I added with a smile before his hand reached for my butt.

"In no way would I want this ass to go, but baby a bit of hiking isn't that big of a deal. I'm not asking you to come for a run with me." he pointed out.

I pulled away as he grabbed my ass tighter, making me smile more. I loved him so much I would have actually agreed to go for a run with him, but I didn't mention it.

"Fine." I replied, making his face illuminate suddenly. "But you wait for me at all times and if I want a break, we take a break."

"Deal!"

The hike to the top was not as tough as I thought it would be and since Niall knew how clumsy I was, he helped me every time he noticed I needed it. I loved feeling his hand in mine, even if only for a few seconds, and it always surprised me how strong he was. We stood at the top and I tried to catch my breath as I looked around. Despite being not that high, the sight was very nice and I suddenly felt happy that I agreed to that.

I pushed my hair behind my shoulders, now totally aware of how dirty it was, and rubbed the back of my hand on my sweaty forehead. Without thinking, I gripped Niall's fingers and didn't let go as I looked at the skyline. I felt him grip my fingers tighter but he remained silent for a while before taking his phone out. He let go of my fingers to take a few pictures but I still kept quiet until I finally turned around. My lips curled when I noticed he was taking a picture of me and I shook my head.

"Nop, none of that!" I let out with a chuckle as I took a few steps closer, putting my hand in front of my face. "I'm all sweaty and dirty."

"That's your best state!" he argued with a laugh when I realized he was actually filming.

"Oh my god, Niall stop filming!"

He laughed more and pulled me closer to kiss me. I let him press his mouth on mine and closed my eyes, perfectly aware that he was actually filming that kiss, too. I wanted to be annoyed but the truth was, I liked it. I wanted souvenirs of us, too, even if I already had a ton of those. He pulled his phone down, still kissing me, and he probably put it back in his pockets because I felt both his hands reach for my jaw and neck. I felt the salty taste of his skin on my tongue and it made my whole body throb. Everything about him was turning me on.

"Fuck, you taste so good." I whispered, making him smile against my lips.

"I'm all sweaty." he pointed out with a chuckle as I shrugged before he became serious again. "If we were a normal couple, I'd post that video on instagram with the caption 'I love her'. I'd post the picture I took of you with the skyline, too. I'd probably caption it with, 'the most beautiful sight' like the cheesy man I am and I'd be talking about you. I'd take a selfie of us right now and post it too. Our friends would like it and leave comments about how disgustingly sweet we are. My cousins would make fun of me. Louis would comment everything by laughing at us with a few emojis and curse words. And we wouldn't give a fuck because we'd know they'd just be jealous."

The thought made me sad but at the same time, his words were nice to hear. Sometimes, I allowed myself to imagine that we were both still living in Ireland together. We'd have normal jobs, hang out on the weekend, meet on wednesdays for a drink or two with our friends, and keep going to the movies only us two every friday night. Perhaps he would have fallen in love with me anyway, or I liked to believe it, and we'd buy a house together and probably a dog. We'd take long walks through the familiar streets and maybe fly to France once in a while to see my parents. I couldn't tell if this story was better than the one we were going through right now and I tried to convince myself that the context was different, but the feelings would be exactly the same. Would they, though? Would Niall really love me that way? Would we have drifted apart? Would he have found an other girl, a girl I probably knew, someone that went to school with us, someone I would be jealous of forever, even after I would have found someone, too?

I swallowed the lump in my throat, knowing I would never know, and just tilted my head as I stared at Niall. He looked amazing, as he always did, and I just sighed.

"I'd probably post a million of pictures of you, especially pictures of you when you fall asleep on the couch. I have tons of those on my phone."

He frowned and his lips parted as he pulled away a bit, his arms now around my waist. "No you don't!"

"I do! And they're password protected so don't even try to delete them!" I pointed out with a smile, making him grimace. "More seriously, Niall. I like our story. We're not a normal couple and it's alright. We're both very private anyway and everyone in the world getting a glimpse of us like we were some reality tv show to follow... I wouldn't like that."

"I know." he whispered, making me smile sadly.

"I barely post on social medias anyway, but apparently it was a 'good idea' to make them official and stuff. Not my idea."

He laughed. "Yea I sort of guessed." he admitted, bending down again to kiss me. "Okay how about I treat you to a nice restaurant now? Then we can end the night in our incredible motel room, what do you say?"

"And I'll show you the surprise I brought." I added with a smirk. Immediately, he frowned and I chuckled. "Don't worry, you'll like it."

The whole time it took us to go back to the car, I spent it thinking about what he had talked about. Us being a normal couple and doing normal things together. It was all a fantasy, but it was still interesting to imagine.

We agreed that we needed a shower first and quickly took one together before getting dressed. I was surprised neither of us had tried to start something in the shower but I really wanted to build the lust between us and perhaps, that's what he wanted to.

The restaurant was crowded and I just hoped no one would recognize us. Niall asked for a table far from the door and we ended up in a corner and hidden from most people, which made me feel slightly better. I proposed to sit so he was facing the wall to make sure he wouldn't be recognized and finally, we asked for a bottle of wine and ordered our meals. I felt uncomfortable in the dress I had picked and realized that I hadn't actually worn something like that in a while, except for the wedding we went to. Niall never complained about the clothes I would wear and that was nice. He always had a nice comment when I was wearing a dress or a skirt but he also made a few raunchy comments when I was in sweatpants so I was not sure it had anything to do with the clothes.

"You look gorgeous." he just said, making me smile as I brought my glass to my lips.

"I love what you're wearing, too." I pointed out, raising my eyebrows.

His suit was a lighter blue than what I was used to and it looked nice on him. I stared at the chain on his neck and tilted my head, enjoying the fact that he was not wearing a tie.

"I'm very glad you love showing your chest hair because I really love seeing it."

He laughed more than I expected as he filled my glass again.

"You know what I love? You. Naked. Laying on a bed and ready for me." he whispered with a smirk.

"That's very very dirty of you." I chuckled, taking a sip. "Are you trying to get me drunk?"

"You're the one who gets very dirty when you're drunk." he pointed out with a smile. "But no, I'm not. Are you gonna tell me what's the surprise you brought?"

"If I tell you, you may want to skip dessert."

"I skip desserts often now, I'm not 15 anymore." he rolled his eyes with a smile.

"Try more 20. You love dessert." I raised my nose up before pressing my lips together. I watched him as he looked down at his plate and took a bite of his food before taking a sip of wine. "Handcuffs. I brought handcuffs."

I didn't expect that but he literally choked on his wine, making me laugh. I tried to hide it by biting my bottom lips and he finally cleared his throat. I felt bad when I saw his eyes water but he finally found his breath back and blinked a few times, staring at me.

"Why?"

"The other day you said you wanted me all tied down." I just shrugged. "I just thought it was worth a try."

He stared at me again and I stared back, my smile turning into a fond one as I tilted my head.

"You're ready to try anything, aren't you?"

"Almost, yea." I admitted, shrugging only one shoulder this time. "If it turns you on then, i'm in!"

"That gives me so many thoughts." he admitted with a laugh and I could swear he started eating quickly after that.

I finished my plate and when his eyes met mine again, I smiled more. I meant what I had said, I was ready to try many things with him, whether it was sexual or not, and the thought of loving each other with so much distance between us like we would have to do very soon made me hold my breath. That, too, I was ready to try. And he had promised he wouldn't see anyone else, which reassured me more than I thought it would. Was I starting to trust him again?

"You're right. We're gonna skip dessert." he finally let out, making me laugh again.

We finally asked cakes to go and he left the bag near the door as soon as we walked in the room. His lips found mine and I kissed him back, chuckling against his mouth as we stumbled around to reach the bed.

"You think someone saw us today?" I asked low, pushing his jacket off his shoulders as it fell on the carpet with a thud.

"No, we're good at this. You know what else we're good at?" he replied, letting two of his fingers slip in the front of my dress to pull it down. "Fuck, you're not wearing a bra."

"I knew you'd like it." I mentioned with a smile, unbuttoning his shirt and pushing it off his shoulders before working on his pants. "How bad do you want to use me?"

His eyes found mine and I could swear I saw something in his facial expression, something brutal, rough, something that came from instinct, something visceral, as if he wanted to grab me by the throat and use me until I'd beg him to stop.

I reached for the zipper of my dress and squirmed out of it before taking a step back and moving my panties down. He just stared at me, shirtless with his pants unzipped, and all I could think about was him on top of me, making me cum over and over again. He looked at me like he was literally going to jump on me and I tilted my head, nibbling on my bottom lip but staying out of reach.

"They're in the front pocket of my bag." I just mentioned.

It took him a few seconds but he finally found them as I sat on the bed, my heart accelerating as he walking closer. It was the very first time I would allow someone to do something like that to me and even if it was making me nervous, it was also extremely exciting.

"Are you sure you're ready to let me do that?"

I swallowed hard and nodded. "Mmhm, I trust you."

I did. I trusted him with my body. I trusted that he would make me cum good, that he wouldn't do anything that I didn't want to, even if I was tied up, and I trusted that he wouldn't just leave me there or anything like that.

He made me lay down on my back and used the handcuffs to tie me to the bed before letting his eyes roam on my body for a few seconds. The position was not uncomfortable but I knew it was going to be hard not to move at all.

"If at any moment you want me to untie you, or if you hurt, you tell me, okay?" I nodded and his eyes moved on my legs. "Fuck I wish I could tie your legs too. If you move them too much I'm gonna spank you so fucking hard you won't be able to sit for a week."

His words made my heart jump in my chest and he moved closer to the bed, his hand slipping between my legs and reaching my pussy.

"Just tie one of my legs with a pair of sweatpants."

His eyes found mine as his eyebrows raised. "Are you serious?"

He looked surprised but I just nodded and quickly, he did what I proposed. The knot was not really tight and if I moved enough, I could probably untie it, but when he brought his hand back between my legs, I felt totally submitted to him. He pushed his pants down with his free hand and my lips parted when I saw his hard cock spring out of his pants. I had no idea why I was so turned on by him but I suddenly started thinking about all these years I thought about him on top of me, late at night, back when he didn't even see me as a potential lover.

"You're so fucking wet. And impatient." he pointed out, running his fingers up my stomach and leaving a wet trace on my skin before going back between my legs. His pushed his fingers inside me and I let out a whimper, feeling my eyes flutter. "Fuck, I don't know how I'm gonna last. Just the sight of you all tied up is making me so fucking hard."

I watched him bring his hand to his cock, rubbing it with my wetness until it was coated and despite myself, I let out a short whimper. He moved closer to me, rubbing the tip of his cock on my lips and quickly, I wrapped my lips around his tip. He grabbed the back of my head to hold it and pushed his cock in my mouth, making me choke before pulling back.

"That sound is fucking amazing." he pointed out before doing it again.

I choked one more time but the more he did it, the more used I was getting and when he finally pulled away completely, I swallowed hard and panted. My heart was beating hard but I was not sure if it was because of lust or because it stressed me a bit to be in this situation.

"Stick your tongue out." he ordered before tapping his cock a few times on it. "Look at me."

My gaze quickly found his and he groaned, rubbing his cock on my tongue for about a minute before moving away. My eyes followed him as he took his pants off completely along with his socks and got on the bed, between my legs. He let both his hands run on my legs and my thighs before reaching my pussy he bent down just to suck on my clit for a while, making my eyes roll back in my head as I moaned. Slowly, he crawled on top of me and fingered me slowly as his thumb rubbed on my clit.

"You're mine, yea?" he asked, looking straight in my eyes as my lips parted. "Say it."

My eyes fluttered as I felt an orgasm build in my stomach and he probably felt me clench around his fingers because he quickly took his hand away and I let out a moan in protest.

"You're mine."

"Mm, I'm yours."

I thought about that time he fingered me in my room for the first time in months, and I remembered he had asked me the same thing. I never thought Niall was an insecure person and I knew it was probably just because the fact that I belonged to him turned him on, but it was also right after he found out about Louis and I.

I thought he'd push his fingers back inside me but instead, he moved up, placing his knees on each sides of my chest before brushing his cock on my mouth. It throbbed on my lips and the thought was so hot that I almost came. He started jerking off, his tip hitting my lips before I finally opened them and sucked on it again. He groaned, pulling his cock up and I whimpered as I ran my tongue on his balls, taking one in my mouth and sucking on it. This time, he let out a moan and started grinding against me.

"Fuck, your mouth always drives me so fucking crazy."

He moved back, rubbing his cock on one of my tits before taking place between my legs again and rubbing the tip of his cock on my clit. I squirmed, unable to move, and pulled on my arms. The handcuffs made a light noise against the bars of the bed and he looked up.

"Gentle. You don't want to hurt your wrists do you?" he asked, raising his eyebrows as a smirk draw itself on his lips. "I know you want to cum but a little edging has never killed anyone, yeah?"

I hated edging. I knew the whole point but Niall was a tease and being so close to cum over and over again was torture for me. Clearly, it turned him on though and I bit my bottom lip very hard.

"You look so desperate." he added. "Look at you, fuck."

"Please, please fuck me."

His eyes moved up to look into mine and he seemed surprised by my plea. "I love when you beg me."

Instead to do as I implored, he slid a finger on my slit and pushed it in my ass, making me squirm again. "I haven't done that since the last time I did it with you."

I held my breath, my heart suddenly racing, and he added two fingers in my pussy to fuck me slowly. I could feel his hard cock press against one of my thighs and I just wanted him deep inside me.

"You let anyone else fuck your ass this year?" he wondered as I quickly shook my head. "Good girl. I promise I'll make you cum harder than anyone ever has."

I tried to relax and my eyes fluttered when I felt the tip of his cock push against my ass. I breathed in and let out a few curse words when it was finally in, opening my eyes to look at him again. He spit in his hand and brought it to his cock. I felt him jerk off a bit before pushing the rest of his dick inside me and bringing his hand up, rubbing his thumb quickly on my clit at the same time.

"The way you throb around me... fuck, I don't know how long I'm gonna last."

He focused on what he was doing, pushing himself in and out of me slowly as I wiggled and whimpered. He was bringing me so close to an orgasm and when he felt I was about to cum, he moved his hand away from my pussy and pushed himself deeper in my ass.

"Niall please, please make me cum."

I didn't expect him to start fucking me harder but he did and even if he wasn't touching me anymore, I knew I was about to cum.

"Jesus fucking christ,"

I felt him shake as he got an orgasm but he pulled out of me and continued to cum on my pussy, bringing his thumb on my clit and rubbing it quickly with his sperm and making me reach immediately my own peak. I shook and cursed, feeling him rub his tip on my thigh, spreading more of his orgasm on me.

It took me a few seconds before I finally opened my eyes and I smiled when he lied down on top of me to kiss me. His lips moved slowly against mine but it's only when I pulled on my arms again that he chuckled against my mouth.

"Alright, alright. I'm untying you."

He started by my ankle and finally undid the handcuffs, bringing one of my wrists to his lips and kissing it gently. He moved back over me to kiss me again and I wrapped my arms around his neck, trapping him with my thighs on each sides of his waist.

"You're such a tease." I chuckled in his mouth.

"Hey that was the whole point." he argued with a small laugh. "Was good?"

"Mmhm, definitely."

After a few minutes, he sighed and moved away. "I really need to pee, I'm sorry."

I laughed and waited until he came back to go to the bathroom too and clean myself. When I joined him back in bed, the lights were off and he was under the sheets. I quickly cuddled his side and he wrapped his arm around me. We remained in silence and once again, a wave of love flooded inside me. It was always that way, late at night, when I was in his arms, and I was scared it would drive me insane to not be able to cuddle him at night when he'll be away.

"Thank you for trusting me." he whispered. "I really hope someday you can trust me again with your heart, and not just with your body."

I licked my lips, not really sure of what to answer. I knew the post-orgasm feeling was making me a bit euphoric but I wanted to tell him that I would. I wanted to tell him he just needed to be patient again... just for a very short time period. I wanted to tell him that I knew I would eventually give myself to him completely again, that he would definitely have the chance to break me again, to hurt me in a way no one else could hurt me. Instead, I swallowed my words and closed my eyes.

"I'm gonna fucking miss you, Niall." I whispered, knowing my voice would crack if I talked louder. I closed my eyes and swallowed the lump in my throat, feeling something stir in my stomach. He kissed the top of my head and I didn't know if I was going to be able to stop myself from crying. His voice reached my ear in a soft murmur and I hugged him tighter.

"Not as much as I'll miss you."

#niall horan #niall horan fluff #niall horan smut #niall horan fanfic #niall horan fan fic #niall horan fanfiction #niall horan fan fiction #niall horan writing #niall horan story #my fanfics #yam

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rosa-berberifolia · 4 years

Text

New Edition|Stranger Things x Reader|Jim Hopper x Reader|Part 3

A/N: part 3 to the ST fic. As Beyonce said, I’m feelin’ myself. And I like where this is heading in my head so there is probably going to be another part or two.

Warnings: a peak at some sexy times, moderately NSFW towards the end.

Word Count: 1770 +/- 100

Y/n sat with El in the cabin watching TV. She needed something from the closet and so Y/n got up from the couch and walked to the bedroom. She came to the mirror and stopped herself before grabbing what she came for. Something had caught her eye: her own reflection.

An odd, terrible feeling, that Y/n had decided in that moment she did not care for, settled in her stomach. A churning ache. Disappointment, jealousy, and surprise. All of this time, being fed images from the TV about what women were supposed to look like, Y/n just figured that if THAT was how women were supposed to be, then that must be how she looked. But she didn’t. What she saw in the mirror was different. It didnt look like the women on TV.

She was shorter than those women. The TV women had more voluminous hair, but hers fell flat near her head. The TV women had soft, almost porcelin skin. Y/n was crinkled and scarred from so much time living a hard life in the Dark Place. And the TV women had defined, narrow waists, and curvy hips and chests. A definite hourglass figure. But Y/n had no defining difference between her chest, waist and hips. And when she turned to the side, her stomach stuck out. The TV women definitely didnt have that.

‘Why dont i look like them?’ Y/n wondered, feeling almost betrayed by her own body. Her heart was hurting so much, it had fallen deeper into her chest and it ached brutally. If the TV women was what women were supposed to look like, then that must be what men like to have. And if she didnt look like those women then she must be unattractive to men. And if Hopper is a man, then he would not be attracted to Y/n. This train of thoughts chugged on and on. Spiraling around and around in her head. But it was that last thought that thoroughly broke her.

Y/n stood silently in the room, motionless other that a slight shake that took over her body. She watched herself in the mirror, angry at herself for being different. Jealous of the women on TV who could get any man they wanted because they looked the right way. And sad that Jim would never want her. All this time, since her initial vision of her and Jim, she had grown to love him. She thought that Jim would grow to love her back, but now she saw that that wasnt possible because she didnt look like the TV women.

Tears fell from her eyes which were still glaring at herself in the mirror. Just so dissappointed in herself. And confused. Why would she see that vision of her and Jim waving together if Jim would never want her? Her vision never lied to her.So why was she seeing this?

///

Over the net few days, the animosity that Y/n felt towards herself spilled out into her interactions with El and Jim. Specifically Jim. And it didn’t go unnoticed. Jim tried being extra kind to Y/n to see if that would pull her out of her funk. But the kindness just made Y/n’s heart ache for Jim even more, and that yearning turned to jealousy. It only made things worse. Jim was at a loss. He didn’t know what he had done to make her so severe towards him, nor did he know what to do about it. But he’d give anything to see her smile again. He loved her smile.

One day El had taken the TV into her bedroom to try to see Mike, no doubt. Jim used this opportunity to find out what was going. He came up to Y/n who was sewing something quietly on the couch. He put a strong grip around her arm and pulled her across the room to the other bedroom. He closed the door gently and went to sit on the bed, pulling Y/n to stand between his legs, their eyes almost level.

“Alright. You’re gonna tell me whats going on.” Jim ordered, his voice stern and his face strict.

Y/n’s gaze softened for a moment, seeing the concern on Jim’s features, thinking for a moment that he might care about her the way she cared about him. But then she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror in the bedroom again and her mood went back to what it had been before.Tears threatened to spill over her lashes. How would she explain this to him? Could she even? She was torn.

“Is it something about a vision?” Jim’s voice softened and his face followed suit. He tried to look you in the eyes.

‘Friends don’t lie.’ Y/n remembered. She looked down sadly, and nodded as her jaw gave a tense twitch.

“Okay..what was it about?” Jim pressed on. Y/n looked up into Jim’s eyes and found him looking at her concern and fondness. She couldn’t take it. She shut her eyes tightly to get the image out of her head. “Was it me?” Jim continued. Y/n pressed her lips together, afraid that a sob might escape them. Slowly, she nodded again. Twitch.

“Okay, good. We’re getting somewhere. Was there anyone else there?” Jim asked again, his hands starting to gently rub up and down Y/n’s arms. The action made Y/n open her eyes and look at Jim curiously. His eyes bore into her, looking for answers. Y/n frowned and sighed in defeat, and then nodded again.Twitch.

“Were you there?” Jim asked. She didn’t fight it anymore, she just looked down and nodded. Then Jim’s hand came up to cup her cheek and get her to look at him. He bent his head down a bit so that he could catch her gaze. “What were we doing?” he said in almost a whisper.

Y/n quickly shook her head. She knew she wouldnt be able to get any words out without crying. The way he was touching her, and the tone of his voice, it made Y/n hurt, thinking that he was just doing it out of pity. Reminding herself that Jim could never want her. Jim’s other hand came to cup her other cheek, pulling her closer to him.

His lips pressed together for a moment, as though he was thinking. Then he took a deep breath before talking. “Does it have something to do with why you were asking El about kissing?” He looked into Y/n’s sad eyes trying to find the truth.

Y/n gulped. Her breath hitched in her throat.Her lips parted after a moment to take a desperate breath. She looked longingly into Jim’s eyes, which seemed to mirror hers. Y/n nodded, almost unnoticeably. But Jim caught it. And he breathed out in relief. Then slowly, he eased Y/n’s face to his and he gently put his lips onto hers.

A quiet sob bubbled out of Y/n’s lips and tears fell down her cheeks. She thought he was only doing this out of some kind of obligation. “It’s okay Jim,” She started as she pulled away. “You dont have to.” She looked sadly at the ground. Twitch.

Jim’s arm came around Y/n’s waist and pulled her tightly to him. “What are you talking about?” He made her look back up at him. “i’ve been wanting to kiss you for the longest time.” He admitted.

An anger of sorts rose up from her chest. “Friends don’t lie!” Y/n almost yelled. She tried to squirm away from him, but Jim’s grip was too tight. Twitch, twitch twitch.

“No...they dont. And I would never lie to you.” Jim said matter of factly. Y/n searched his eyes for signs of deceit. But she didnt find anything except devotion and adoration. She huffed in frustration. How could he possibly want to kiss her? She was too different. But the way Jim was looking at her told her that he felt the the same about her that she felt for him. And so, giving into her feelings and Jim’s soft touches, she leaned forward and pressed her lips to his once more.

///

Later, Y/n and Jim found themselves in nothing but their underwear. Y/n laid on the bed with Jim halfway on top of her, one arm around the underside of her neck, his other hand gently caressed her hair as they shared their deep kisses.

Jim pulled away and looked at Y/n with concern. “If at any point you want to stop, that’s okay. Just tell me.”

Y/n smiled at him. No one had ever given her the option of a decision like that. At The Metal Place, they always told her what to do, or she was punished. Having someone care enough about her enough to give her a choice made her heart burst with joy. “I’m okay.” She whispered. Jim nodded and bent back down to resume their kisses.

With Jim’s gentle touch and encouraging words, soon the two found themselves bare and moving together, waving. And Y/n’s vision came true.

///

Y/n sat on the edge of the bed, reaching for her t-shirt as Jim laid under the covers of the bed.

“Where are you going?” Jim asked as he watched her, not wanting Y/n to leave.

Y/n looked back at him with confusion. “To bed?” Was she doing something wrong? She didn’t know how things were to proceed after such acts.

“You can sleep here, if you want.”Jim explained. “You don’t have to go back to the cupboard.”

“Share the bed?” Y/n asked. Jim nodded. Y/n looked around nervously. “No protection.” She muttered just clear and loud enough for Jim to hear.

Jim chuckled at Y/n’s comment. He slid to the edge where Y/n was sitting and he wrapped an arm around her waist, starting to pull her back to bed. “I’ll protect you.” He said into her neck before he laid a kiss there. Y/n smiled and hummed at the kiss. And feeling Jim’s strong arms and his warm lips on her, she wanted nothing more than to spend as much time as she could with him. So she nodded, and Jim quickly pulled her back under the covers.

“I’ll protect you.” Jim repeated as he laid on his back and motioned for Y/n to rest her head on his chest. She did, but not before leaving a loving kiss to it. Jim wrapped his arm around her to pull her close to him. His other hand found hers and held it tightly. Y/n let herself relax in Jim’s hold, and soon, they both fell asleep.

#stranger things reader insert #stranger things imagine #jim hopper x reader #jim hopper imagine #jim hopper #chief hopper x reader #chief jim hopper x reader #chief jim hopper #chief hopper

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wkemeup · 5 years

Text

Fireworks

summary: Bucky Barnes doesn’t do crowds. He certainly doesn’t do fireworks. But he’d follow you just about anywhere.

pairing: bucky x reader

word count: 3.1k

warnings: PTSD symptoms, panic attack, a very sweet bucky

author’s note: So I had no intentions of writing anything for today until I woke up at 6am and had this idea and couldn’t fall back asleep. This fic is shorter than my usual and didnt go through the pretty long drafting/editing period as my other fics, but I hope you like it just the same! ❣️

“Bucky you have to come with us,” you urged light-heartedly, tugging on his sleeve as he kept himself planted on the couch; nose deep in To Kill a Mockingbird, the lasted book on the line of a long list you had written up for him. A smile pulled at his lips, though he made every effort to suppress it.

He allowed his eyes to glance up to you over the top of his book to find you dressed in a red and white striped blouse that tied at your waist, revealing just an ounce of skin above your jean skirt, a red bandana in your hair tied up away from your face, and press on tattoos of Steve’s shield and the American flag on your cheeks. Bucky did his best to hide how endearing he found you.

“It’s Steve’s birthday, too, you know,” you drawled out, pulling out your last resort with a slight whine in your voice as you purse your lips into a frown. Puppy dog eyes and all, even Bucky had a hard time holding his ground.

“I’m not good at this kind of stuff, doll,” Bucky finally admits, setting the book down on his lap. He sent you an apologetic smile, mouth pressed out into a thin line. “You have fun for me, won’t you?”

You eventually nod, though your heart breaks a little every time Bucky shoots you down politely, keeping himself isolated and alone at every opportunity. He hid under the disguise of soft smiles, of wanting to finish his latest read, or the certain knowledge he carried that his presence would only end up being unwanted. He was wrong, and you told him so every time, but Bucky Barnes was a stubborn man.

“Ok Buck. You know where we’ll be if you change your mind,” you reply, careful to hide the hurt in your voice though Bucky picked up on it rather quickly. You brush your hand over his hair, the only person he ever let do that, and retreated over to the elevator to meet the rest of the team.

Bucky watched as you disappeared, swallowing back the guilt in his chest every time he had to say no to you.

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to go, didn’t want to spent time with you, because he did. He latched onto every moment he could get with you. But there was something about large crowds and the Fourth of July particularly that didn’t sit well with him.

He knew you’d stand next to him the entire time, keep yourself at just the right distance away in case he needed an escape or something to ground himself to. You’d done it for him in the few times he had allowed himself to venture out to these public events Stark put together, but it never ended well for him.

He’d either end up having a panic attack in closet by himself after he ran from you in the brief moment your back was turned or he’d have to struggle simply to endure the whispers of Tony’s guests mumbling about whether he deserved to join the avengers after all he’d done and if he was even still human at all. Sometimes he wondered that himself.

Bucky let out a heavy breath. The tower was always so quiet when you were gone. He used to enjoy the quiet. Somewhere, along the line since he met you, that had begun to change.

He missed your laugh as it echoed down the hall, the sweet sound of your voice as you teasing argued with Sam over the last bowl of cereal, the soft patter of your footsteps upon the hardwood floors in the early hours of the morning to make the first pot of coffee.

Bucky tried to concentrate on his book instead of the image of you in the back of his mind, but found he could hardly get past the next page. He chewed on his lower lip, willing himself to at least finish the chapter. You had so many books on his list for him to read and he wanted every excuse to make you smile, and nothing did that quite like when he finished one of your favorite novels and you could finally talk about it with him. The excitement in your face, the passion behind your words; it was enough to make his heart sore.

His concentration was shot.

Bucky groaned, setting the book down on the coffee table, and found himself glancing back towards the elevator.

“No, don’t be an idiot,” he grumbled to himself, getting up to grab a glass of water from the kitchen. Even as he poured the water to his glass, brought it to his lips, and drank it dry, he still couldn’t seem to pull his eyes away from where you had left.

“Shit,” he cursed, the weight of the realization that he’d follow you just about anywhere heavy on his chest, even if it was to some glorified propaganda style event with a crap-ton of people that were guaranteed to set him on edge.

Bucky set the glass in the sink and stalked off over to his room. A quick glance through his closet and he didn’t seem to have much along the times of America themed attire. His red henley, the only bit of color in a sea of black clothing, sat at the bottom of his laundry basket. Couldn’t be easy for him, could it?

So, he found himself in Steve’s closet. He rummaged through the motorcycle jackets, the white button down dress shirts, the series of navy skin tight t-shirts, until he found the shirt he was looking for. It was a loose fitting, heather blue t-shirt with the Captain America insignia at the center. You had bought it for Steve jokingly after he found out about his merch line.

Bucky pulled the shirt over his head and adjusted the bottom as it sat on the edge of his jeans. He caught a quick glimpse of himself in the mirror and grimaced at how silly he felt. Grabbing his navy bomber and shrugging it over his shoulders to hide the reflection of his left arm, he did his best to exhale away the nerves in his stomach. He shook his head, not giving himself another chance to back out, and made his way to the elevator.

The streets of New York were always busy, but it seemed that everyone was out tonight. Back before the war, Bucky had loved the Fourth of July; the picnics in the park, the celebration of the country he had loved, the hot dogs and hamburgers, the fireworks.

These days, crowds weren’t his friend and the fireworks presented a problem all their own, though he did his best to push that to the back burner for now.

Bucky twisted his way through the upstream of pedestrians, keeping his head down and hands tucked into his pockets to avoid recognition. He wasn’t too far away. He’d only have to spend another few minutes on his own before you’d find a way to help calm him down. He tried to focus on the smile upon your face when you realized he came. The thought alone was enough to make the corners of his lips twitch up.

By the time Bucky found himself in yet another elevator, this time on his way up to the rooftop where he’d be sure to find the rest of the team, his heart was beating rapidly in his chest. The doors parted to an influx of Bruce Springsteen playing over the speakers, the loud chatter of the guests, and the sizzling of the grill to his left.

Bucky stepped out into the crowd, hands clenching in his pockets as he searched for you amongst the sea of faces. He kept himself still, just waiting for the moment you’d come into view, when suddenly a hand clamped down on his shoulder. It nearly set off his defenses enough to rip the arm off whoever laid a hand on him when he turned around to find Steve staring at him.

“Wow, Buck, I didn’t think you’d make it,” Steve grinned, looking him over and his eyes narrowed on his shirt. He lifted an eyebrow quizzically. “Is that my shirt?”

“It’s all I could find,” Bucky grumbled, offering Steve an apologetic glance though he brushed it off rather quickly as he swung an arm around Bucky’s back. Bucky sighed, trying to let himself relax. “Is everyone here?”

“Everyone but Sam,” Steve replied. “He usually gets a cabin out in the woods on the Fourth. You know, to get away from the fireworks and stuff.”

“Right,” Bucky nodded, exchanging a kind of knowing look with Steve.

“Y/n should be over by the bar,” Steve said after a moment, a smirk upon his face letting Bucky know he was fully aware of the reason why he was at this party and it wasn’t for him. He didn’t seem to mind much at all. “Try to have a good time, Buck.”

Bucky pressed his lips into a thin line, the best he could do for right now, as Steve disappeared back into the crowd towards Natasha who was waiting for him by a table with a series of cups standing in the shape of a pyramid and waving a ping pong ball in her hand.

Clenching at his jaw, Bucky turned back to the crowd. It took a moment longer, but then he spotted you standing by the edge of the roof, leaning against the barrier as you sipped from your drink. Bucky found himself smiling, his heart rate already coming back down, before he could realize it. He carefully weaved his way through the crowd until he stood just behind you.

“The city’s real pretty from up here,” he said casually, watching as your shoulders froze at the sound of his voice. You set the glass down on the wall and turned ever so slowly to face him, as if you were worried your ears were playing tricks on you.

The smile that curved up on your lips, the light in your eye, was enough to make Bucky’s knees weak. You shouted his name, half-laughing as you swung your arms around his neck, pulling him flush against you as you squeezed him. He chuckled, letting his arms drape over your waist as he caught the scent of your shampoo in your hair.

“You’re here!” you exclaimed giddily, pulling back enough to see his face. He nodded, trying to act more nonchalant than he felt. You ran your hand over his shoulder, somehow still able to sense the tenseness in his muscles even under layers of clothes. “I’m proud of you, Buck.”

“Yeah, well, it was about time I got out of that tower, huh?”

“I’m really glad you did. This’ll be so much more fun now that you’re here!” you replied, grabbing a hold of his hand to drag him over to the table where Steve and Natasha were throwing ping pong balls into plastic cups full of beer. He tried to ignore the jolt in his heart at the feeling of your hand in his. “Come on, Buck! We’re going to destroy Steve and Nat in beer pong.”

An hour later, and you were right. Bucky never missed a shot. Nat had complained that he was a sniper and that put her and Steve at a disadvantage, to which you argued back that Steve was a super solider and Nat was a world class assassin. It all seemed to even out alright when Nat brought up the fact that you were trained by Clint before you were even a Shield agent.

It was coming up on ten o’clock, when the crowd began to gather over by the edge of the roof. Bucky narrowed his eyes, watching as everyone seemed to know what was happening before he did.

“What’s going on?” he asked you as you began to drag him over to the edge of the crowd, standing just enough away that he could still be a part of it with standing too close to the strangers. He appreciated you more than he could ever say aloud.

“Fireworks,” you replied with an excited grin as bright as your eyes.

Bucky swallowed, forcing out a smile, and turned away from you to face the night sky before you could see the panic in his features.

He’d dealt with fireworks before, heard them in the distance on unexpected nights in the tower. They never triggered him into the winter soldier but they did find a way to bring his heart up to a rate that felt like it could pump right out of his chest and onto the floor at his feet, make his breathing so tight he could hardly get air in, and brings thick line of sweat to his brow.

Tonight though, he’d find a way through it, he decided. For you.

When the first one shot into the sky, he had to admit it was beautiful; red and gold sparkled amongst the dark blue of the sky, peppering amongst the stars. He only flinched a little.

The second one was bigger, completely gold in color and it seemed to last for eternity as the colors brushed upon the darkness like tinsel. He tried to focus on the beauty of it, on the ‘ooo’s and ‘aww’s of the crowd, but found that the booming sound settled too deep in his chest. He hadn’t even noticed your hand slip into his.

After a few minutes, he couldn’t even look at the fireworks anymore, unable to find the beauty in the sparkling colors when he was wincing at every thunderous explosion.

A flash of the trenches in France, to the roar of the train, to the bombs that took out his friends in Germany; dozens of images clouded his mind, bringing him far away from the rooftop garden. His chest was aching, heart pounding painfully through his veins, and he found himself stepping back, retreating away from the crowd. He couldn’t hear your worried voice call his name, not with the pounding in his ears.

Bucky couldn’t quite focus on where he was going, breaths catching in his lungs and unable to find air despite the rapid intake of his breathing. He stumbled through the sliding glass doors, searching desperately for a dark space, somewhere isolated, somewhere he could get a grip before someone noticed.

That’s when he felt a gentle tugging on his hand. He couldn’t quite make out what it was, his vision blurring, as his feet led him through the loft. Then, he was ushered into a back room and helped to the bed where his aching legs gave out. The door to the room was closed and the explosions were muffled.

Hands brushed along his thighs, then up the sides of his arms to cup at his face. He was breathing too fast, becoming light-headed in the effort, but somehow he could still catch sight of you standing cautiously over him, worry etched in your features as your thumbs brushed against his cheekbones.

“Bucky, I need you to breathe,” you said calmly, offering him the sweetest smile he’d ever seen. He nodded, doing his best to follow your request. Your hand swept over his hair, pushing it behind his ears. “You can do this, sweetheart. Here, try and breathe with me.”

Bucky watched as you took in an exaggerated breath, letting your chest raise as you inhaled, held it for a moment, and exhaled with your whole body. You nodded for him to try and he reached out to grab onto the fabric of your shirt by your waist, bunching it into his hands just to find something to hold onto.

He took in a breath, though it was shallow, it was more than he had a second ago, and he let it go.

“Good. You’re doing so well, Bucky,” you praised, nodding encouragingly for him to try again. You took in a deep breath yourself and Bucky followed, focusing on the gentle hue of your eyes, how you watched him struggle to breath without an ounce of pity, with only a sea of adoration and sincerity.

Slowly, he began to find his breath again. Though his lips felt numb and his head was a little dizzy, his heart came back to a normal pace and you let out a sigh of relief. He barely registered you leaning forward to kiss his forehead before you sat next to him on the bed.

“Sorry, doll,” Bucky said after a long moment of silence. He winced it his own voice as it came out, breathy and rough around the edges.

“Oh, no, please don’t apologize,” you shook your head quickly, turning to face him. “I should have never pressured you to come. I should have realized the fireworks would affect you like this. We could have gone somewhere like Sam does...”

“You’d do that for me?” Bucky asked, genuinely shocked.

“Of course,” you said, as if it were obvious, as if it didn’t make Bucky’s heart skip a whole beat. “Maybe next year? I think we’re safe before the next round in an hour. If we head out now, I can have FRIDAY can soundproof your room and we can catch up on the next show on your list. What was it again?”

“Parks and Recreation,” Bucky replied, a smile upon his face.

He couldn’t seem to fathom how you had stumbled into his life and took on his burdens so willingly. It was a constant effort to remind himself that he was allowed to enjoy the small things, like reading with you on the couch and watching tv through the early hours of the morning, that maybe he deserved to find happiness.

“Oh right! That’ll be a good one,” you giggled, tugging on his hands to help him back to his feet. “I’ll text Steve so he knows we’re heading out. He’ll understand if we don’t say goodbye. No need to get back out into that chaos huh?”

You really thought of everything.

Bucky could only nod, too caught up in how much his heart had begun to swell. A blush in his cheeks as you took his hand in yours, so casually, like it didn’t mean the entire world to him, and led him back to the elevator. You didn’t let go the entire walk back to the tower.

Even as you helped weave him through the sea of people bumping into his shoulders that would have normally set him off, your cautious glanced back to him and the gentle squeeze in his hand was enough to keep him grounded. He found that he didn’t much mind the crowds, didn’t mind much of anything at all.

Not when he was with you.

Thank you so much for reading! ❤️ If you enjoyed this fic, please consider supporting me at my ko-fi account ✨

#bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x you #marvel #marvel imagine #mcu imagine #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes fic #reader insert #my writing #bucky fic #bucky x female reader #tw: panic attack #tw: ptsd

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katsukikitten · 5 years

Text

Winter Rose

You sit in the common area, wrapped in bundles of blankets with your teeth chattering. Your resentful eyes watch white flakes fall atop of an already knee deep snow.

You seemed to be the only one with a problem with the glistening, icy white that blanketed the cold hard ground overnight. Denki, Sero, Mina, and Kirishima all literally jumped for joy when Aizawa called the dorm phone announcing a very rare but much needed snow day.

No school was an excitement for majority of the class save yourself and two others who reluctantly dressed in their warmers clothes as they were dragged into the snow ball war that just HAD to happen.

Thankfully you made the class an odd number so you opted out.

Which is how you found yourself cold to the bone no matter how many hot baths you took or how many blankets you wrapped around your shivering frame. Your quirk made you weak to the cold. Damn your plant like nature. Which made your relationship with your crush a love hate one, not as if he ever noticed you for more than a few seconds anyway.

Your eyes follow him now as he stands by a tree. Not really participating aside from the occasional ice wall he would put up to block an incoming barrage.

"HEY THATS LONGER THAN TWENTY SECONDS TODOROKI!" A hot head yells loud enough to be heard through the glass. Clearly his competitive side kicked in and he is no full fledge in this battle of all battles.

Mostly because they placed Izuku on the opposing team.

You peel your eyes away from the heterochromatic boy with his broad shoulders and ever cool expression. You begin to idly flip through the channels seeing love story after love story related to both snow and the holidays.

Two things you hated most.

To be honest you probably could make yourself hardy enough for the cold had you taken time to practice but it was more of the holiday aspect that came with the cold that hindered you.

Even after the passing years you can still hear the screams, smell the tang of blood mixed with cold biting air that promises more snow. You remember it being dark for longer than you thought it should be.

Turns out it was your luck this tragedy would strike on the longest night of the year. You still remember the numbness of your limbs, the cold that seeped deep into your small frame. Gripping into your bones with icy fingers.

So much so you lost limbs to blackened flesh.

Limbs your quirk gave you the ability to grow back.

Icy tears free fall from your cheeks from the memories, the stench. The sets of dulled eyes paired with panicked ones.

*"RUN MUSUME!"*

You squeeze your eyes shut, snuggling deeper in the blankets focusing on the actors' voices hoping, praying that they drown out your mothers.

"Y/LN?" A cool voice calls from the arch way to the common space causing you to jump. You furiously wipe away your tears and steel your chatter jaw to answer.

"Yes Todoroki-sama?" You let a smile creep into your voice but he can tell it is forced. He does not answer as he makes his way to the couch. His eyes sparkle in the sunlight reflected by the cold, frost clings to his left side as he asses you. You offer a huge smile, willing yourself to feel the good parts of your crush despite feeling the ever present cold air that seeps off of him.

Although Izuku helped him battle his inner demons, ice is so engrained in him it must rush through his veins. He takes a seat next to you giving you his right side and you damn Kamisama silently. The chill caresses your skin and you clamp your jaw shut to keep your teeth from chattering.

Seconds feel like hours before he breaks the silence.

"I didn't know you like romance holiday movies." He says softly, eyes glued to you while yours are glued to the TV.

"Ah no I was flipping channels but got distracted by my phone." You giggle hoping the little cover lie works.

But the Gods work agaisnt you as your phone buzzes loudly on the coffee table well out of reach.

You go to back track but before you can speak Todoroki leans over to get it and places it on your lap, offering you a soft smile.

"Distracted because it's so far away?" He says softly before adding, "Why don't you come outside Y/LN?"

"Ugh!!" You half howl eyes darting to the winter wonderland just behind the frosted window, "Did Mina send you to get me?"

He laughs softly tucking a stray hair behind your ear with his icy hand, causing a shiver to run along your spine.

But could you blame the cold for that one?

A small blush manages to dust your cheeks and Todoroki bites the inside of his lip.

How could you always be so God damn cute?

"No, she didnt ask me to 'drag' you out." He admires you much to your confusion, "I just thought it would be nice to see a winter rose in person was all."

Your cheeks flush deeply at his comment.

Was the normally oblivious Todoroki *flirting* with you?

You swallow before another iced hand is placed on your forehead.

"Do you have a fever? Your cheeks are so red Y/N." His eyes drink in your features. How your eyes widen so slightly at the use of your first name. How cute your cheeks look all red and flustered for him.

How your perfect fucking kissable lips poke out in a slight pout.

The only thing that he's noticed that he doesn't like about you is how sometimes you recoil from his touch or the flowers blooming in your hair would wilt in his presence. Every accidental brush of hands, every time he stands in line behind you or stands beside you, you smile politely before moving completely to the other side of the room.

It's why he's been so hesitant to show you a fraction of how he feels. Shoto can't fathom Kirishima or Mina lying to him that you actually like him, especially now as you lean ever so slightly away. It would go unnoticed by anyone else. But he sees it.

And damn does it hurt to feel that knife slip in between his ribs.

All pushed in by you.

He sighs softly and you finally break the passing moments by answering, unknowingly, all of his questions at once.

"I hate the cold Todoroki-sama." You blink up at him and watch his face bite back a grimace.

Maybe that wasn't the nicest way to put it? Maybe you should have given some preface to that statement.

But honestly who shares their childhood trauma before even confessing their feelings?

You knew you couldn't. It was best to keep everyone at arms length anyway. That way when you lost them it wouldn't hurt nearly as bad.

An eye of burning ember and freezing ice once over your features before he stands. His eyes linger over you and you shudder beneath his weighted gaze.

*"Arms length."* You remind yourself as you watch him, he slowly makes his way out of the living room and once you hear a door shut you believe him to he outside.

You stare down at the phone in your lap, your pathetic reflection staring back up at you. Droplets collect on the front glass of your hand held you wipe them away leaving your hands outside of your cocoon before you close your eyes to think.

Something warm seeps into your chilled fingers and you open your eyes to see a cup being pressed into your hands.

A cup filled with your favorite tea, looking to be the perfect color that you always make it.

Your eyes flash up to see Todoroki offering it to you, you blink furiously.

"Thank you." You squeak out, and you further fluster as he sits next to you. This time it is his left side that is closest and you can now feel the heat radiating off of him.

He grabs the remote and selects a good Ghibli movie. Despite the warm tea your teeth chatter causing a muscled arm to be pulled to a sculpted body.

"Todo...Todoroki-sama!?!" You try half heartily to pull away to no avail.

"Please call me Shoto or Shoto-kun." He says sternly causing your gut to clench as you start to lean into him. You wonder if he is putting off extra heat as normally, no matter what side you face, a chill would settle over you even if you're half way across the room. You snuggle deeper feeling warm for the first time all winter and even sighing aloud as he gives your frame a small squeeze. His hand slipping down your shoulder to rest on your ribs.

You don't notice the flower buds weaving themselves into your hair as they bloom with content.

Todoroki cannot help the smile on his lips as he looks down at you. Your eyes clearly becoming heavy as you begin to sink into sleep.

He is not sure how long he let you sleep there but long enough for people to begin coming inside.

All to be met with a glare of burning heat and icy rage. Kirishima makes the best of getting everyone into the kitchen for cocoa as you continue to sleep.

He cannot bring himself to wake you but he knows he has too soon as the sun is setting turning the snow outside into cotton candy pinks and dreamsicle orange.

"Y/N.." He half whispers, applying pressure to your hip. You try to snuggle deeper into his warmth but his cool hand slips under your chin.

"Icy Shoto..." You pout and he swallows his desire but it gets stuck in his throat. You look amazing with half lidded eyes and lips pushed out in a pout.

He cannot help himself. Cannot stop himself as he leans in towards your perfect lips as he captures them with your own.

Your eyes widen before fluttering closed as you melt into the kiss, having never felt this warm in your life.

While the buds finally bloom to roses of contrasting colors in your hair.

Roses of deep shining reds and whites that seem to shimmer blue.

@my-todoroki-academia a fic for you that you didnt ask for bb

#todoroki x reader #bnha todoroki #todoroki shoto #todoroki shouto #todoroki #todoroki shoto x reader #bnha shoto #bnha au

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