#also i decided to not do like. unrequited crushes or anything like that for these. lets stay rooted in character analysis & narrative lol | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

oceanxveiined · 10 months

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Genshin Verse Side Muses:

*Mentions of abuse, dysfunctional families, manipulation, torture, violence, experimentation, ableism, transphobia, and death, not necessarily all present/to various extents depending on each bio, ahead.

1) Chang Da’Lun (500+/appears 23): Half-Adeptus, born some time before the Cataclysm. He can shift into a smaller birdlike form at will, though it does take a bit out of him to switch back. It doesn’t stop him from shifting into it on his own or a friend's whim though.

His father was a Yaksha named Wuye, alias Caligo, who had inevitably become consumed by his karmic debt and became more akin to a malevolent demon. Though admittedly, the adeptus had already possessed quite the cruel streak, even long before he’d fallen. Being driven mad by the karmic debt meant his slaughters turned to fellow adepti and humans alike, which had also grown to be far more frequent and brutal. Each consumed opponent led his power to grow as he’d absorb their vitality and any abilities they possessed.

By contrast Da’lun’s mother, Anhe, had been fully human, having been with a group of treasure hunters who’d taken her from her family in ransom when they’d strayed too close to the maddened Yaksha’s territory. When they had realized and tried to sneak away, she risked her life to draw Wuye out and betrayed them all in a desperate bid for freedom and power. She offered them all to be slaughtered and devoured by the corrupted Yaksha, as well as to offered to lure more to satisfy his bloodlust for incentive to make him spare her own life. She even offered to be his mate as well, to let herself be used by him as he saw fit, sparing no expense to give anything and everything she could to ensure she survived this encounter. He conceded out of convenience, taking her as promised and continuing his slaughters about Wuwang Hill with her aid.

Anhe delighted in having his favor, even with how terrified of him she’d been at first, growing more and more sadistic herself with every massacred he’d rend, every death scream that filled her ears while she remained unscathed. The thrill of power and having a mate so powerful to keep it was too alluring and far too intoxicating, she would never dream of ever parting from him.

Only for her to end up alone and powerless anyway when the former Yaksha was killed shortly after the birth of Da’Lun.

Much of his childhood had been Anhe relentlessly tormenting him, using him as a scapegoat for how her life had fallen apart and due to having been affected by his father’s karmic debt as well ( both in her continued presence alongside him up until that point and in stubbornly lingering at his lair where the miasma was all concentrated rather than returning home with him gone ). Da’Lun took the abuse without protest, wholeheartedly believing her and his own guilt. He spent his whole life striving to ‘make up’ for his existence, in bringing her gifts and attempting to make her life easier every way he could. To protect and provide for her as his father had intended.

It all came to a crashing stop when his mother at last succumbed to the cursed energy infesting their home. Or so he tells himself and anyone who ponders of her fate, not wanting to admit he himself had killed and devoured her. It had been when she’d tried to end his life first and the resulting corruption of them both had his adeptal nature spiraling out of control during the struggle. His Electro Vision had been what had ultimately murdered her, bestowed upon him during his struggle as she denounced and cursed him, which he hadn’t realized until the morning after.

Plagued with guilt and fear, and knowing he must have taken on her share of the karmic debt's influence, his father's ability considered, he traveled Teyvat to distance himself from his former home for a few years. For 500 years, he witnessed beauty and horrors alike throughout it all, before he decided to settle some time in Sumeru. His main aim had been to learn all he could on humans and their histories ( learning from each Darshan over the course of the centuries he’d spent there, changing his appearance every time he’d reapply ), as well as to pass the time in a way that would not aggravate lingering traces of his father’s influence. It was while he learnt from the Amurta Darshan when he met Danae. With time to spare, and admittedly intrigued by the utter madness of her ideas and her equally frenzied determination to see such impossible fantasies made reality, he signed a contract to assist her in any endeavors she may undertake for them, as she would his own, per its terms. They would maintain it dedicatedly before briefly parting ways when her illicit studies were discovered.

He himself remained at the Akademiya mere weeks before deciding his life had dulled too much without her odd ideas and eccentric ( not to mention at times exceedingly cruel ) methods, setting off to travel again in search of her. Traveling through his homeland, he would come to meet Ozzy, whom he would follow to Mondstadt, after he’d found him interesting company, especially when the man would encourage him to not feel so wary of the karmic debt’s influence. There, he would become a founding member of his gang when it resulted that the man’s interest had been likewise piqued and thus given him the invitation to stay.

Ozzy was able to locate and drag Danae into his business thanks to Da’Lun’s scheming and using the terms of their contract to rope her in.

What could he say? He would be a fool to let one of his favorite toys go. Just as he would the chance to see what would come out of putting so many volatile little components together.

Surely the end result would be most spectacular indeed.

Oswald “Ozzy” Beauregard / Ásvaldr Bjornsson (appears early 20s): One of the remaining survivors of Khaenri’ah, though he keeps that card very close to his chest, having fled the nation after the surviving the Cataclysm. Only Da’Lun is actually aware of said fact, due to their shared longevity and closer bond compared to many of the others. If asked of his origin, he will always give the half-truth that he is of the Sumeru region. He currently gets a kick out of pretending to work for himself at his little tavern named Fleur de Nuit, from where his gang operates under the guise of a legitimate business.

Stricken with immortality, Ozzy tends to push the limits of what said immortality will do for him, especially since his perception of pain and danger has been skewed severely by his curse. For the longest time, he had wandered about the desert and Sumeru’s forests, picking fight after fight using the very Abyssal energies he’d been corrupted with. Even with no formal combat training outside teachings he learnt as apprentice mage ( these very learnings being the reason he was was to maintain his appearance as it was, without succumbing to the curse of wilderness ), his increasingly frenzied manner tended to allow him to prove a match for the hilichurls, Eremites, and Treasure Hoarders he encountered, leaving brutalized corpses and wreckages in his wake, and plenty a scar to mar his own body. Some of which healed worse off than others due to his inability and gradual lack of real want to properly care for himself. Eventually, he would be found and formally taken in by the Fatui when he had too grievously injured to fight them off.

Not that he would have wanted to even if he could, considering how much they piqued his interest.

He had been with them long before Danae had joined, having willingly surrendered himself to be experimented on by Dottore out of boredom and curiosity to see what the man could get out of it. As well as a vain hope to possibly stave off his Erosion and keep his mind with the Abyssal energies eating away at it when his own treatments would prove increasingly inefficient. Needless to say, Ozzy’s sanity had still taken quite the toll throughout the centuries he’s been alive, and the outright torture he faced through the time he’d been with them had truly not helped in the least. Especially not while being injected with god remains had steadily twisted up his mind, more and more. The Abyssal energy he’d already been afflicted with had ironically been what helped keep himself through it though, allowing him to fully assimilate the god’s lingering energy into himself and steady his condition.

When Danae had decided to desert the Fatui, she broke Ozzy out from containment and left him an experimental Delusion to have him serve as a diversion so she could escape, figuring he would have some exploitable grudge that would prompt him to seek vengeance. And he served his purpose well, slaughtering Fatuus after Fatuus he encountered with the three tail-like, bladed chains he could manifest from it. He did so with great delight and utmost zeal, damn near like an animal in frenzy. But in truth, he really cared not for getting even. He rather merely wanted enrichment, as he called it.

While Danae had figured the Delusion would simply kill him in the end, his own longevity and the god remains he’d assimilated allowed him to use the Delusion so freely without truly debilitating consequences, though still at certain cost to his body after particularly prolonged usage. It severely aggravates the place with the god remains had been injected, low at his right side where the Abyssal energy was at its highest concentration. Due to it also being the place of his most severe wound and one of the ones that truly never healed properly, it leaves him feeling as though something had been gouged right out every time he’d stop its use. Still, in the moment of that first use, all he could think of was the thrill of the fighting and being able to run about, free at last. To this day, that very thrill is what keeps him using it, even knowing the painful consequences.

The euphoric high he felt back then lead him to completely destroy the location all together, both in his own kills and in tampering the delicate machinery that would consume the rest of the location along with it in the ensuing explosions. He himself made his getaway before the destruction caught him up along with everything else, after finding and bringing along a fellow victim ( not that he consciously saw himself as such ) of the Fatui experiments.

After hearing tales of Monstadt, her homeland, the idea of a nation whose Archon had no real say in its ruling appealed to him greatly, Thus, he would hijack and man a Fatui ship to gain leave off Inazuma, heading to the Southern side of Liyue, and making their journey back to Mond that way.

Ozzy’s aim in making the gang had solely been to collect interesting people to surround himself with, nothing more nothing less. Something to help stave off ennui and keep his mind sharp; a little pet project he could maintain or ruin at his leisure when the time came. It only became a formal organization incidentally, but he finds it a decent pastime to run it and especially the business he and Da’Lun came up with as a front. Especially when he genuinely ended up attached to a certain select few, though he maintains it is only out of how entertaining the lot of them are, themselves and with him.

Due to past experiences, particularly what he witnessed during the Cataclysm, he has a mild to severely violent visceral reaction to fire based abilities; which is only worsened by his love of deliberately avoiding triggering his own phobia and habit of gambling with extreme stakes, typically involving fire in some way.

What sort of gambling man would he be if he let something like that stop him, after all?

Elisabeth “Eliza” Merrimack (18) - A Mondsadt-born girl whose family lineage traces back to the Imunlaukr clan, after the clan had broken up due to a schism. Originally Visionless, she would gain a Dendro Vision ( chronologically set late in the events of the Sumeru Archon Quest ) and take up Catalyst-based combat.

The eldest daughter of her main family at the time, she had a horse riding accident in her youth that left her paraplegic, exhibiting little to no movement in her legs even after treatment at the church. The fact that it had taken them some time to get her there, seeing as she had been lost for days, was probably behind it. Regardless, her family despaired at the incident, frantically trying everything they could to heal her, even as the church insisted nothing could be done. Even as she herself tried to reason it was alright; that she didn't need to be, having accepted their verdict when her family could not. And they never truly did.

When she was fifteen, the Merrimacks ultimately accepted an offer from the Fatui to aid them ( though in hindsight, Eliza couldn’t but wonder if it had been seen as an excuse to have them take her off their hands ), and carted her off far from home. Betrayed at her family giving her away so easily, especially after she realized they would not check up on her or visit, Eliza at last fell into despair after seeing what awaited her at the hands of the Fatui. Her parents had been lied to, after all–Eliza had not been taken in to receive care, instead becoming subjected to experiments with god remains like every other subject they got their hands on.

And no one would be aware of that to come save her. Assuming they would even care to try if they did.

Things began to change years later after meeting Danae, who was assigned to oversee her. To be precise, Danae had at first been in charge of her post-op treatments, ensuring the effects of the experiments didn’t disrupt her vitals and in keeping her alive overall. They began to know more of each other and interact after the then Fatuus had been promoted and would have her as an exclusive subject, due to her ideas and personal project.

Even with how callous Danae could be, she and Eliza eventually came to get along well due to Eliza coming to understand Danae’s wordless gestures and tough-love care after the former had begun to get attached to Eliza. Said care usually being in the form of snuck treats and material comforts. It wasn’t until later on in their friendship that Eliza learned it had been because she reminded Danae of her younger brother, that she had specifically requested to oversee her treatments because she wanted to help her like she'd intended to help him. Learning why and how she intended to do that did embitter Eliza rather than endear her though.

That said, they truly became each other’s first real friend and confidante after Eliza had been–even if gruffly–encouraged by Danae to start speaking up for herself and the first thing Eliza did was tell her off for thinking she ought to ‘fix’ her and any other person, for that matter. It had been a gut reaction based on Eliza’s own resentment of how her family regarded her as well as the god remains in her acting up due to her agitation.

Still, even while the burst of temper had startled Eliza, it had been enough for Danae to not only respect the girl, but also to begin to doubt her own goals. Most notably, it was enough to prompt the Fatuus to pick up her old ideas anew rather than continuing the original experiment plan she’d had altogether, choosing to help make amends in fashioning Eliza a special wheelchair to take her out for enrichment. Not that Danae would ever admit that’s what it had been for, even in present day, but Eliza understood and was grateful for it all the same.

The day Danae broke out, she had actively tried to reach Eliza to bring her along, but was unable to in the chaos she’d wrought and severely underestimated. Thinking her dead, she prioritized her own survival and left without a second thought.

Eliza hadn’t realized she’d been abandoned once again, rather had been merely confused by the happening and chaos around her. She patiently awaited Danae to come, trusting the Fatuus to soon fill her in and protect her if need be. Instead, it was the newly freed Ozzy who had found Eliza and offered to bring her along after having slaughtered her guards and in hearing her request to see the stars outside before he ‘put her out of her misery’ had moved him.

And especially because she then tried to cut his throat the instant he got close enough to try and carry her.

After convincing her he did want to bring her along, not kill her, she at last conceded and let him take her away from the wreckage of the lab. Eliza's tales of her home nation had been the reason Ozzy had chosen to settle there, and she was more than happy to return with him, though flares ups of the god remains in her did pose some problems both were unsure of how to handle. Not that he trusted anyone in Teyvat to be able to take care of her as they should, especially considering how she’d ended up in the Fatui’s hands in the first place.

Still, she is grateful he took it upon himself to allow her to stay by his side as his ward, even while she couldn’t offer him much in return in terms of fighting skill, money, or knowledge besides that of her home. When he founded his gang, she did find purpose in aiding with the logistics aspect of running the front for his gang, using the learnings of her youth. Without her, it would have fallen apart from the start, Ozzy would always say, leaving her giddy with excitement and her heart full. After finding and enacting a solution to quell the unstable god remains in her ( taken place post-Sumeru archon quest, story-wise ), she would start taking a more active role in the gang as aid to their resident healer. In addition, her wheelchair would be adapted for combat, to suit her needs and her Vision’s abilities.

She is well aware that elemental concentrations worsen the god remains' extreme and dangerous flare ups, but she still constantly insists upon staying with everyone else in the gang and utilizing a soothing device relying on Elemental energy anyways. She’d rather spend it in comfort and with her friends, even the lot of them encourage her to when she frets what could come out of it ( even Ozzy telling her the risk of that danger is exactly why they are so comfortable was a twisted solace that wound up giving her more confidence to accept her wants to be with them ). Once the traces of god remains in her would be sealed off enough, she is able to head out with them with her wheelchair from that point on, as well as set at ease her fears of hurting them. She still feels chronic flares up of pain due to her affliction, but with less risk of it going out of control and killing her dear friends, she can bear it a lot easier.

After all she’d been through, this was nothing. Nothing, in the face of being able to smile and delight in her life to the fullest once more.

Durene (19): Hailing from Natlan, Durene is a demigodess, born from the union of a mortal man, Jevaun, and a nature godess Oloku, whom he had ensnared with a talisman along with several of his friends and fellow warriors when her tempests had threatened their home village. She had fallen for him when he had been watching over her, and had been the kindest of her captors, eventually conceding to be his wife after enough time in his company, as well as certain courtship of his had won her over.

Even while bound to human form, Oloku had been content in their union at first, up until her husband began to get exceedingly paranoid and possessive of her following being imbued with several of her blessings that granted him great strength and renown in his tribe. She began to grow miserable, cursing Jevaun and unable to do much to fight him as he was, as her powers had become considerably weaker compared to his over the years, especially after Durene’s birth. And it didn’t help that it was especially so because the man kept her away from the sea, an important source of vitality for her. Still the goddess did not fault her daughter upon her birth, teaching Durene the ways to be a soothsayer and healer so she could properly go through the initiation process and her actual training in the village once she was of the apt age. At the same time, Jevaun had taught Durene the art of war and conquest, hoping his daughter could bring him renown and glory with her exploits.

Durene took to both her learnings quite well, eager at the thought of being able to contribute to village and her family this way. She particularly excelled in serving as an herbalist and healer, though she did work hard to improve her skills when it came to divination to impress her mother. It always did seem to put Oloku in a far better mood whenever she did, as well as when she would listen to her mother’s tales of gods and places she’d been, of her life prior to being confined to mortal form. Of their Archon, and her great deeds. More than anything, she loved singing for her mother, songs she learned from her and the others in the village, seeing how her voice seemed to bring the goddess some semblance of solace, when she felt her weakest.

At twelve years old, Durene had bonded with an Iktomisaurus she'd named Aje, who helped her gather materials from the seas and magma caves, often keeping Oloku company whenever Durene would gather from the land, or while she worked to make her treatments or to preserve her supplies. Around that time, she also learned the full story of her mother’s plight. Horrified and moved, she would elect to repay her mother all she’s taught her in concocting a clever plan to gleam out from her drunken father the location of each piece of the talisman needed to complete the needed ritual and free the goddess. With this knowledge, Durene was able to find and bring them to her mother with Aje's aid. The goddess would aid her in completing the necessary steps once it had all come together. As her bonds would break and her strength returned, Oloku lamented being unable to take her child with her. Promising to return with a means to ascend her as soon as she could, the goddess would transform into a pillar hundreds of crabs that would scatter into the sea and leave Durene standing alone at the outcropping. Bittersweet and all-too brief as their parting was, she felt content in knowing her mother would be happy at last.

The good mood would not last long, as Jevaun flew into a deadly rage in realizing what had happened when he awoke to the sounds of a howling sea storm after she returned home.

His rage did not frighten her, even as he demanded answers. Did the she not care about their village? Of what the goddess would do to them, now that she was free? Of why she’d been confined to mortality in the first place?

Durene truly cared not, insisting Oloku had borne and suffered enough under his suffocating hold. If they were all to be destroyed in her vengeful wrath, it was for the slight they’d done against her, and thus truly fair.

Her answers would brand her a traitor in the eyes of her father and, to his claims, their people. To ensure the goddess wouldn’t completely destroy them, he killed Aje and locked Durene away, making made sure Oloku could never find her and that no one else would in turn ever think to help free her, as no one else would be aware of where she'd 'disappeared' to. As far as anyone knew, she and her Saurian companion had been killed while gathering materials.

She couldn’t say how much time had passed since he’d left her there. Days, then weeks, then months went by languishing in her prison, in the presence of no one else but her father, whenever he would stop by to bring her food. If her refusal to concede to his pleas to betray her mother and attempts to break out didn’t enrage him enough to leave her to her own devices the next few, that was. It wasn’t until she’d exhausted every desperate, rage and grief-stricken attempt at escaping that Durene formulated a proper plan to escape.

The next time Jevaun came to see her, he found his daughter seemingly unresponsive. The man freed her from her bonds and frantically attempted to wake her, only to find his daughter conscious after all, taking advantage of his closeness to grab hold of him. The man was only able to catch a brief glimpse of her newly bequeathed Anemo Vision mere moments before she would sap the breath from his lungs. Her face, twisted in every trace of hatred and resentment she felt towards him, was the last thing he’d ever see as he would succumb. Durene would hold no remorse for her actions, even as the village people would come to find her and try to seize her in retaliation.

Escaping their clutches and leaving them to the mercy of her mother’s wrath, Durene would take to travel about Teyvat as a wandering soothsayer, making a pretty coin on divination and healing. Truly, that whole time she had been seeking a way she may ascend to join her mother, sparing no expense wherever she may go. She'd even forged a binding vow for herself, giving up her tongue, and thus ability to speak in exchange for power. Through her journey, she fostered a particular resentment born in her in Sumeru and the way the Akademiya had gone about managing knowledge at the time ( such as the reason they had rejected entry for her, thinking her to be of the desert folk ). Which lead to her resolving to ensure that place would be the first she may pay a visit to once she reached her goal, to tear it asunder for the offense, seeing as its god would surely not be able to match her when the time came.

It was in being found by Ozzy in Liyue and being requested to come with him, Eliza, and Da'Lun along the way that she came to have company once more. The final founding member of his gang, she would happily settle in Mond with them. But by no means does this mean she had given up on her goal. With Da'Lun and his influence, as well as the addition of Danae later on, Durene would find use in the team’s members to further seek the information she required for her own ultimate goal. Who knew, perhaps she would just need to be a little more patient, just a little bit longer.

Well, fine by her. That, she had plenty practice in.

Jaeda Purmizra (18): The daughter of an affluent family in Sumeru and the most recent addition to Ozzy’s gang. She joined them after running away from home and continuously hitching rides on caravans then later merchant ships that guided her to Dorman Port in Mondstadt. From there, she hid among a lucrative-looking delivery, which lead her to Ozzy’s tavern, where she would be promptly caught for having stolen foods from the convoy and attempted to make off with other items to try and sell in the main city. Danae had nearly left her bound and at the complete mercy of Treasure Hoarders as punishment, had Eliza not intervened and personally pleaded her case to Ozzy. He accepted to take Jade in as well, only because he knew it would anger Danae in the process, and because he was intrigued by her Vision in particular,

Born male and then named Jahar, Jade had been the family’s sole heir and was raised into the role accordingly ( read: impossibly strict ) by her mother. It was thanks to a young servant girl who tended to her every need that she even began to experiment with and realized her actual gender identity. All because the girl had wanted to play dress up and needed a friend to help her, not realizing all the decorum she was breaking in daring to ask the heir, of all people, such a thing.

It had been quite the relief in realizing it, though, even when she hadn’t been actively searching for it. But to her, it meant everything from then on. And it meant despair, as she continued to masquerade as her mother’s precious only son and heir. She didn’t want to upset her mother, after all, especially since the woman banked so much of her bid for power as head of the family upon her. So she kept that her little secret, playing with the girl and growing up happily alongside her over the years.

Up until she and the girl had been caught playing.

The girl had been punished severely for her ‘crime’ and Jade was forced to bear witness to the bloody ordeal for humoring her. Only after the girl was left near death did Jade face her own punishment, the horrid humiliation her mother enforced upon her before an audience of the woman’s closest friends and advisers.

The anger she felt in seeing the life dwindling in her friend’s eyes and the cruelty she faced ignited a single-minded determination to make every last person in the room pay for her beloved friend's pain, enough to for her to black out, coming to only when her mother had screamed.

Snapping back to consciousness, Jade felt bloodcurdling horror and cathartic relief in realizing she’d burnt her mother’s lovely face beyond recognition, every other cruel person who’d participated in her torment left as naught but charred corpses in her wake. In spotting the gleaming, blood-red gem clutched tightly in her hand.

She didn’t stay long, stealing her friend away and running away from home with an intent to bring her along. They could make a life together away from them now, she was sure of it. She had a Pyro Vision after all, she was no longer powerless to protect them!

With the severity of the girl’s wounds though, her friend had little time left. With her last breath, the girl made her promise to live life for the both of them and to be happy. To stay safe, and never let anyone dictate how she may live her life ever again.

That day, Jahar died along with the servant girl. In his place and bearing the name of that girl to carry on her memory, Jaeda would set off to find that happiness she’d promised.

Mako du Raie (16): A Visionless young heir to a prolific merchant family in Fontaine, and the member who had joined the Snake-Eyes gang before Danae and Tua had. His father, Benshi, had been a doushin from Inazuma and met Mako’s mother, Marie, while she learnt the trade from her father, prior to the Sakoku Decree being fully enacted. Mako is their illegitimate child, though he was claimed to be his mother’s younger brother to save face for the family. As such, he was raised primarily under the strict watch of his grandmother and even stole the title of heir to the family from Marie, due to the story they’d given him.

He took to his studies like a fish to water, being quite bright and precocious for his age. And in his eagerness to pursue his grandmother’s approval, he went far above and beyond the efforts his mother had ever put into her own. The family agreed he was definitely a far more suitable heir than she as a result, though he avoided his mother’s jealous wrath by asking she be involved in everything he did. Like this, the woman’s temperament was appeased, her going as far as to even take credit behind his talent and boast of him to all who would meet them.

In all honesty, he would have been content enough handing her the reins of the family, had a business venture to Mondstadt not changed his mind entirely. His mother’s boasting lead to drawing Ozzy’s attention, the man having been seeking a nice, convenient little liaison for his gang’s front. With the boy being as young as he was, not only would he be easy to exploit, but his talent and influence would absolutely prove worth the effort to draw him in, just as he'd hope.

As such, Da'Lun would be the one to meet and gain his trust. To persuade him to join Ozzy’s gang as their merchant contact. And, to ensure Mako’s position and control over his family’s affairs, Da'Lun would even go as far as to encourage Mako to eliminate each and every family member that could possibly stand in his way of managing it all himself.

Mako couldn’t help but give in, even with how complacent he’d been before. Even being fully aware of the horrific task he would have to taken on to ensure his control over the family's business and finances. All it took was being given the affection and doting he always wanted, rather than lauded praises for his potential and saccharine-sweet yet ultimately empty words he knew better than to believe. It took one friend, who cared and spoiled him so, to make him turn his previous wishes of simplicity and contentment from before and pursue a more ruthless ambition without a qualm. Even as he gazed into his mother’s dulling eyes, frozen in horror and anguish, he would only feel a strong sense of satisfaction as he stepped over her without a qualm. As he would make his way over to Da'Lun, who would fondly ruffle his hair with genuine praises aplenty before carrying him back to Ozzy’s little haunt.

He knew full well he was to be used by Ozzy’s group, having realized it early on in Da'Lun’s attempts to worm his way into his heart. But once he’d met with the others in the gang and Ozzy himself, there was no longer a single trace of lingering doubt in his heart that his brutal choice had been in his best interest. Looking at the lot of them gathered to see him, all varying shades of proud of what he’d accomplished, no matter how horrific, he determined the excitement and validation that came with what they did was a lot better than living his life within conventional rules.

Where else could he feel like he was at the top of the world like this?

Tusitala / Tua (20): Originally hailing from a coastal village in Natlan then migrating to and eventually settling in Liyue due to his father’s relentless pursuit of riches and lack of interest in the wars that ravaged their nation, Tua had been a Treasure Hoarder well before his coming of age. He is rather proud of the fact, too, often boasting of his own successes compared to other factions, especially after he’s fought his way through a group of them in a show of his own Natlanian battle prowess.

At first it had been at his father’s urging that he joined and stayed with the Treasure Hoarders they’d met up with on their way to Liyue Harbor. It was only to serve as something to make for a side hustle while his father took care of other business dealings at first ( taking care of logistics for that gang while Tua himself got to take on the more dangerous aspects, as he also managed an artifact appraisal business with things Tua and the gang would bring in ), then it became Tua’s sole obsession as his own greed grew, right along his addiction for every victory and bounty he secured them.

Tua was quite content with this life, thinking himself the luckiest man in the world to have this chance. Even if he did have to surrender near all of his share of their spoils to his father, to quell the man's avarice ( and to ensure the man didn't try and take it all from him, by force or outright theft ). But with what he was allowed to keep or what he managed to squirrel away to pass off as such later, Tua would take to decorating himself handsomely to show off his successes. As such, he’s got several piercings ( many of which he did himself ) along his body, as well as bits of gold embedded in his skin, particularly about his shoulders. He also has a few tattoos to commemorate his victories and his comrades, which glow whenever he uses his Vision.

Speaking of, his Geo Vision came to him during a show of his conviction to protect his Treasure Hoarder ‘family’ by all means and any costs. In this case, it had been in protecting them from a squadron of Milileth by the skin of his own teeth then later its aid, having chosen to cover them on his own to ensure they could make off with a particularly rich score. Because of it, he became quite popular among them, with the lot thinking he would lead them to the greatest successes and eventually take over rival gangs and become their overall leader.

The thought strongly appealed to him, enough that he resolved to make it a reality. As leader, he would have a greater right to a bigger share of the spoils, and he could be independent enough to break away from his father, too. And of course, being able to protect his closest comrades and look after them with greater responsibility and authority. That was his greatest desire above all else, one he would swear before them during the celebration of his blessing by the Lord of Geo.

Though he did eventually fail to keep his promise to them when a conflict with Fatui, and severely underestimating them, left his group all slaughtered or near death, himself included. With his last lingering traces of full consciousness, he lamented not being strong enough to protect them all, and expected to meet his shameful end along with them.

However his survival had been ensured when Danae had stumbled across the massacre. Though initially focused on eliminating the injured and resting Fatui and with her own hatred of Treasure Hoarders having her near ready to ditch them all as it was, it was due to her having determined his potential usefulness upon noting his Vision that prompted her to nurse him back to health.

Deliberately leaving all the others to their fates, as she didn’t need them.

When Tua would ask later after awakening, she would swear they were all goners by the time she had found him. That Tua had supposedly been the only one strong enough to survive because of his Vision.

Grief would take hold, but he wouldn’t linger on that feeling too much. Not enough for it to consume him, anyways. Not when his savior made him an offer to come with her, a suggestion to carry on in his comrades’ names and honor their memories in continuing to plunder and seek the treasures they'd so craved. Feeling both indebted to her and a thrumming need to protect someone once more now that he was without a family ( he dared not return to his father nor join up with a new Hoarder faction after such a harrowing defeat ), he would choose to follow Danae to Mondstadt.

Along the way and upon reaching their destination, they would take up mercenary work and end up wrapped up in the group they currently associate with now, after participating in an attempt on the young head of the Snake-Eyes gang alongside others like them. Said hit actually having placed by the young head, Ozzy, himself, using it as a ploy for recruitment to test if Danae had been worth Da'Lun's recommendation to his group. Tua likewise making it out alive alongside her and having demonstrated his immense strength and capabilities had been the icing on the cake. He was more than happy to accept the offer to join after that, no need for incentives or anything.

Well, okay, maybe the pay grade and further chances to seek riches while with them was a pretty good incentive. That, and being able to take part in a whole new gang he could protect and grow stronger with helped convince him, too. There was something reassuring about being able to protect them them of all people, those who didn’t need to depend wholly on him and could defend themselves should his strength fail them. But would still rely on his skills to add to their own, and truly ensure they would all be okay. And he will make sure they would be. He refused to lose any one of 'his own' ever again, swearing the very same oath he gave his late comrades before.

He will protect his newfound family, with all he has. Whatever it takes.

Mason Ennosigaeus (17): Sidon’s actual biological child. He was stolen away from his family by Morjena when she had found out of his existence, snatching him during the chaos she'd set off after tricking Eremites into looting the caravan the man's wife had traveled with on her way to the main city. It was a move meant to ensure Danae had no competition to being the man’s heir, especially after the woman and her attendants had been killed in the ensuing struggle. Danae was supposed to kill Mason upon being left with him, as Morjena had thought she’d thoroughly beaten the heart out of her. When it turned out that she hadn’t and even wound up with an attachment to the boy, Mason became an opportunity for Morjena to ensure Danae stuck around, regardless of the abuse she faced, regardless of how much harder she became to control the older she got.

Mason himself was frequently abused by Morjena while Danae was gone and quickly came to rely on the latter for everything. Not that it necessarily meant he was entirely helpless. His weak constitution left him frail as it was, sure, but in truth, Danae never failed to endlessly dote on him every chance she was home to see him, even going as far as to sacrifice her own meals for his sake. She would even forgo sleep to guard him against Morjena as best she could, and when she did, she would deliberately sleep in a way that if the woman pulled anything, she would be the one to take the brunt of her mother’s abrupt assaults. Every little thing he could ever want or need and THEN some was his at his command, and without hesitation. He need only ask. She couldn't offer him comforts like reassurances and gentleness, but this, this she could do for him. And he was wholly all for it, appreciating the one good thing he had amid the horrid life he was stuck in.

Inevitably, her boundless devotion and their environment twisted him up as badly as it had her, albeit in a different way. The one who truly wound up heartless and cruel, through and through, just as Morjena was, had been him.

He may come off as shy and unassuming but in truth, he is twice as vicious and self-serving as Danae, behind the gentle demeanor. He is the one person who can ask of her to do anything at his whim, no matter what it is, no matter how hurt she would end up in the process. And he's used that, time and again to sic her on whoever it was he so chose, be it strangers for his own amusement or even people he's realized she started to get a little too close to, in selfish need to ensure she wouldn't start giving away her loyalties. To test that she truly did mean her loyalties to him, and act accordingly if she hesitated or doubted. In his eyes, he still needed her to survive, after all. Especially after an encounter with hilichurls had nearly taken his life, and had cost him his legs just above his knees, even after being rushed to Birmastan.

At the same time, he is also the person others could use to strongarm Danae into damn near anything if they hold him captive, as any threats to him lead her to be all to eager to comply for his safety ( though woe betide those who lose him as a bargaining chip at any point during ). He is the One and Only Thing she has left to lose, but the feeling is not mutual. It hasn’t been from the moment she’d left him at the Akademiya on his own.

Even having been left in the lap of luxury when she'd been forced to flee, being torn from her side and the endless doting, from his greatest asset, left him stewing in a resentful rage. His bitterness and broken heart earned him a Cryo Vision amid the enraged outburst within his room, gleaming enticingly within the wreckage of her final gift to him. That Vision, however, he deemed the greatest gift of all, and one he thoroughly believes was the Tsaritsa’s personal wish to him and show of support.

As such, as of earning his Vision, he swiftly abandoned the idea of staying at the Akademiya. Instead, he sought to join the Fatui, using his power as incentive to be kept of use to them alongside the Cicin Mages. Though he was sure to mask what he did, telling Danae he got to travel for his studies so she never suspects. So her constant stream of money and gifts from afar never end, having them brought to him by agents he roped into his whims that happened to be stationed in Sumeru.

In learning she had also once joined the Fatui only to abruptly disappear, he knew before any of the lot that she was still alive, and elected to keep this fact to himself, to ensure none of his comrades could seek out and find her. However his intentions are far from protective out of any genuine concern. He has full intentions to personally hunt her down and make her face the full consequences for abandoning him. And the Fatui, too, of course. But if possible, he would like to be the one to bring her end himself. To look her right in the eyes as he would use his Vision to make of her a pristine statue for himself to keep.

Maybe then she’ll actually keep her promise to never leave his side.

#hc #v; intertwined fates (genshin verse)#long post for ts #//Ok; lots of notes on this one #For Da'Lun: Ironically; staying w the gang makes the influence of his father’s karmic debt worse; esp the more he kills for em.#Working with Danae yielded the same result; he didn’t realize it then; but when Ozzy made him aware he just #tends to conveniently Ignore that fact; thus he’s become more tempered and sadistic than he was before meeting her.#Absolutely Not making him a ticking timebomb at the rate things are going; No Sir. Luckily; Durene’s there to keep him balanced. Sometimes.#For Oz: If it's not clear; Oz’s Delusion weapon is basically akin to a xenomorph tail kjfnkfjg. Bc YES.#He scarcely uses the Abyssal abilities he has after getting his Delusion. Considers the thing a lil' gift from one of his favorite allies.#Only uses those powers in Emergencies; esp bc he doesn't want to reveal his heritage. Not out of real secrecy or anything.#Bc he wants to wait for the right TIME to drop it on his gang. Like the dramatic bastard he is.#To clarify for Eliza; she really had been baiting Ozzy to get him close to defend herself; not actually resigned to die.#That aside; I like to think her wheelchair post-Vision resembles comes to resemble like #The sealchairs in Witch Hat Atelier. Has one that looks & works like a regular one; then uses the sealchair-like one for missions.#Deffo uses her Vision to move about without help once she gets it; not too frequently bc it does take energy to manifest the vines and such #But being able to do so makes her happy even still. She's getting much better with practice at it. In regards to Durene:#She is their BACKBONE. They would all fall apart or Mcfreakin’ DIE without her around. Is also v fed up with them all & v fond all at once.#When she ascends; she has no idea if she’d rather smite or bless them; when all’s said and done. She'll figure that out then.#For Jade; None of the group know she is trans except for Durene/Danae; both due to accidents. Durene bc Jade accidentally hurt herself and #needed the treatment; Dani due to Jade accidentally admitting it over misunderstanding. Both keep it a secret; which she is v grateful #Aight; Mako time: He’s the youngest yet that makes him no less unhinged than the others; Jade learned that the hard way #Has an unrequited crush on Da'Lun but isn’t fazed about it bc the guy still spoils & indulges his every whim when he gets the chance anyway #He’s usually w them; leaving the family business to be run by two of Oz’s associates. Keeps frequent contact to ensure it doesn’t go under.#Occasionally travels back to deal w things. Like getting tickets to a certain magic show in Fontaine when they all decide to visit.#//Extra Tua notes; he was briefly infatuated with Danae after they began traveling together & she Definitely used that to her advantage.#After getting to know her & the kind of person she truly is; it’s since died down & he even has become more wary of her intentions.#Notably; he is right up there with Eliza & Durene as the group's sweetheart. Even w his avarice; he truly cares & is kind to them.#Mason. Oh boy Mason. He essentially is a Cryo Cicin Mage. Genuinely chose it bc it was easier to move about; being one #Dani wouldn't be Aware of him until around Fontaine. The resulting fallout will Not be pretty. The lad would make Sure of it

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livinginshambles · 10 months

Text

If I could take it all back | James Potter

Pairing: James Potter x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 3.3k

Summary: James' time to pine over you. After James rejected your feelings, and you promised to get over him during the summer break, he finds himself in the same position of unrequited love and wishes he could take his words back.

Can be read as a standalone but part two of a multi-fic

Masterlist Part one

Notes: Not proofread, probably spelling mistakes. Its a happy ending, what a surprise (but I did promise to lovely anon that next time, I'll make it tough on James)

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What would your reaction be if he told you that he may fancy you. You probably wouldn’t take him seriously, he figured. And it’s not as if he actually fancied you, right? His mind was probably just confused because he, for the first time ever, wasn’t so preoccupied with Lily, and could instead acknowledge other girls too.

James plopped down on his bed in exhaustion after their first day back at Hogwarts and his mind wandered off to you.

“Bloody hell, is it me, or was that ceremony more tedious than ever before?” Sirius complained after he too dropped down on his bed across the room.

“Just gets longer each year,” Remus groaned in dismay, stuffing his face in his pillow with a deep sigh.

“And that choir,” Peter chimed in. He didn’t even have to finish his sentence, the rest of the marauders dramatically joining in on complaining.

“And ignoring the toads, there was a bloke who kept making eyes at our Y/N,” Sirius huffed. James’ relaxed posture turned rigid, and he rolled over, so his eyes could snap towards Sirius. “What!? Who?”

“Calm down, Prongs,’ Remus was quick to shush him. “Sirius is exaggerating as usual.” A pillow was thrown his way. “Also, it wasn’t inappropriately making eyes at her or anything. He just smiled at her, that’s all.” Remus ducked the pillow.

“Yeah, and it was completely mutual, so it’s alright,” Peter decided to add his own observation of the incident in attempt to reassure James. His words seemed to have the opposite effect, although James tried to hide the way his heart plummeted. Mutual?

“True, she even blushed a little,” Remus seemed to recall. “You reckon she fancies him?” He wondered out loud and James huffed in annoyance. “That’s ridiculous, Y/N doesn’t fancy him,” he curtly replied. Peter shook his head. “But didn’t she say that she fancied someone last year?”

“Well if she fancied anyone, it wouldn’t be that stupid git,” James stubbornly said. Sirius squinted his eyes at James before a shit eating grin appeared on his face. “Prongs…” he slowly began. “Do you fancy our Y/N?” Remus and Peter’s jaws fell slack, sitting up to stare at James.

James froze and his mouth opened and closed, trying to find the words to deny Sirius’ accusation. “No, I don’t,” he defended himself. “I just know Y/N and I’m telling you, that guy is not her type,” he scoffed.

“Well to be fair, we don’t actually know her type, she hasn’t dated anyone before and refused to tell us about her crush.” Sirius poked. “Well, I do,” James snapped. There was a long awkward silence while the marauders raised their eyebrows at his tone, and then James cleared his throat. “I just mean that I’ve known her longest, so obviously I know her type,” he tried to explain.

“Right.” Sirius slowly drew out. Remus and Peter nodded their heads but not at all looking convinced. James dropped back down on his bed and let his mind wander off to you again. Oh, who was he lying to, of course he fancied you.

“So, lovely Y/N, what’s your type in regard to guys,” Sirius curiously asked you. James shot him an angry look that you couldn’t see as you were huddled against him, your back to his chest so that you two could fit on the armchair together.

“What, like personality or looks?” You tilted your head in question.

“Uh, both?” Sirius asked.

You hummed in thought. “Well, kind of like Prongs, I guess,” you shamelessly admitted, and James almost choked on his own saliva. “Though, look-wise, you’re pretty easy on the eyes too, Pads.” You winked jokingly at Sirius, and he blew you a kiss while laughing out loud before getting back on the matter at hand. “So, James here is your type?” He almost disbelievingly repeated.

You shrugged. “Sure.”

James scanned Sirius’ face and could see the gears turning in his friend’s head. Merlin, he’d have to let Sirius know that he didn’t have to bother playing matchmaker, he’d destroyed any chances of you two ever becoming more by himself, two months ago.

His arms tightened around you unconsciously. It didn’t matter as long as he could keep you close like this. He’d take whatever you’d give him, he decided. He was happy enough with your friendship.

“And not that Hufflepuff guy from the choir yesterday?” Sirius pressed on.

“Huh? Oh!” You furrowed your eyebrows. “You mean Klaus?” You bashfully smiled at your friends. “He actually asked me out on a date, encouraged by his brothers and sisters and all,” you admitted. “I guess he’s cute, but I told him I’d rather get to know him as a friend first, before going out,” you said. “I mean, I’ve never even spoken to him, but I’m not opposed to it.”

James couldn’t help but feel jealous at your words, his stomach turning at the thought of you getting to know some guy and then going on a date with him.

“I mean, he’s not really like James, is he?” Peter asked. James held his breath and waited for your reaction.

“Well, maybe it’s better if he’s not like James at all. It’d probably feel weird to date someone who is exactly like your best friend.”

James frowned. “I disagree,” he spoke up. You turned in his lap to look at him. “I mean, isn’t a partner supposed to be your best friend or something.” James motioned around with one of his arms. You laughed at his statement. “Yeah, your partner should be someone that you consider your best friend, but not necessarily a copy of ‘your existing best friend’,” you remarked. “Maybe Klaus will be another best friend.”

“You can only have one best friend,” James grumbled pettily. “Best is a superlative, there’s only one and that’s supposed to be me.”

You stuck your tongue out at him, and his eyes couldn’t help but flicker towards your lips. James looked away, flustered at your proximity. “I can have more best friends. Peter, Remus and Sirius are my best friends too.”

“But they’re an exception,” James whined. You swatted him. “So, make an exception for whoever I want to be best friends with. I have good character judgement.” James sighed. “Of course,” he muttered in surrender. You beamed up at him and pressed a kiss to his cheek before getting up.

James felt his heart flutter and frowned at the loss of contact. “I’m going to study with Lily,” you said and bent down to give Peter and Remus a kiss on the cheek as well.

You stopped at Sirius and gave him a reprimanding look. “No funny business Padfoot,” you warned him, and he chuckled at the memory of when he had turned his head last minute as a joke, resulting in an ‘almost kiss', because you had quickly pulled back, right on time and tripped. In attempt to hold onto Sirius, you had grabbed his shirt and accidentally ripped it on your way down. When Professor McGonagall had found you on the floor in front of Sirius who was shirtless, you’d both gotten detention. In separate classrooms.

Sirius held his hands up in mock surrender and you gave him a kiss on the cheek too. Then you turned around and left the common room.

“What in Godric’s name was that, Prongs?” Sirius immediately commented as soon as the door closed.

“Pads, no.” James immediately cut him off before he really started to get any brilliant ideas.

“She said you’re her type!” Sirius exclaimed, his arms flailing around enthusiastically.

“Padfoot, seriously-,”

Remus and Peter snickered. Sirius shot them an unamused look.

“Prongs, are you stupid? You’re her type! You fancy her, and she considers you as her type of people she’d date?” Sirius couldn’t phantom why James wasn’t as thrilled about this as he was. Unless-

It seemed that Remus had caught on to it too. “She already confessed her feelings to you, didn’t she?” He carefully asked. James didn’t respond right away.

“She fancied Prongs!?” Sirius gaped in utter shock at James at the revelation, an incredulous look on his face. He turned towards James. “What happened? Oh, Merlin, did you reject her?”

“All that matters is that she doesn’t fancy me anymore, alright?” James ended up saying.

“Merlin, what did you tell her?” Peter asked, eyes wide at James’ reluctance to explain what happened.

“Nothing! I just-, I knew she fancied me, but I thought that Lily was it for me” James defended himself.

“After she found out on the train that Lily agreed to meeting up for a date during the summer vacation before I could tell her myself, she confessed her feelings and I told her that we would always be best friends, but never anything more,” James confessed with a sigh, and he looked down at his hands in his lap.

“She said she understood and that she’d get over her feelings so we could go back to being best friends this year, without having it be awkward.” James trailed off. “And she did, so here we are,” he sighed.

“Well maybe she’s just pretending to be over you,” Peter offered.

“We all know that Y/N can’t lie for shit,” Remus pointed out.

James groaned.

“Wait, when did you even have time to realize that you fancy our Y/N between your ‘sort-of-but-not-really-because-you-two-never-actually-dated’ breakup and today?” Sirius intercepted the conversation again.

Before James could answer, Frank entered the room. “Guys, I’ve got a date,” he breathed out, face still red from running up the stairs.

“Hey, congrats mate! You finally mustered up the courage ‘ey,” James grinned broadly at him.

Frank scratched the back of his head. “Well, Alice did, I guess,” he answered almost embarrassedly, if not for the proud grin he was wearing. Sirius whistled at that, and Frank beamed even more. “Yeah, she’s amazing.”

James smile never faltered, but when he looked at Frank’s gleeful face, his mind wandered off once again and he imagined that if you were to ask him out, he would most certainly have the same reaction.

Blimey, he would never be that happy with just your friendship, would he? He’d have to tell you eventually, he supposed.

But of course, two months would pass by, and he chickened out time and time again, which all led to his current situation. He was sitting at a table in the corner of the establishment, attention captivated by your cheery laughter while tou were on your date with the Hufflepuff boy who was embarrassedly looking away while you patted his arm in reassurance.

“Don’t worry, I fully agree with you. Dave really is sexy,” you winked at him. Klaus relaxed at your words and smiled along, both of you glancing at the waiter who walked away from your table after taking your order.

“I don’t think this is a good idea,” Remus muttered quietly to his friends, in particular to Sirius, who was currently filling a cup of butterbeer with a laxative potion, reserved for your date. Seeing that Sirius wasn’t going to give up, he nudged James under the table.

“Prongs, this is wrong, and you know it,” he hissed. James looked conflicted. His eyes darted between your smiling form, the hand on you arm and the cup of butterbeer.

Jealousy flared up when he saw Klaus lift your hand and kiss the back of it in a dramatic way, and he pushed any feelings of guilt to the back of his mind.

“Well, my old man is already disappointed in me anyway,” Klaus concluded and shot a wink at Dave who came with your drinks. “Danke,” he nodded appreciatively before gawking at your pink drink. “Is that the dragon fruit drink?” He asked. You nodded. “Want to try it?”

“Oh Merlin, this is amazing!” Klaus moaned and you laughed while shushing him, getting strange looks from the people around you. “If you promise to stop moaning like that, you can have it all,” you said, shaking your head amusedly. “Oh, I couldn’t,” Klaus said, but eyed the drink with big eyes in interest.

“You already drank half of it anyway, doofus,” you laughed, and you reached for his still untouched butterbeer.

James’ blood ran cold. “Fuck,” he cursed and before he could help it, he had surged forward and slapped the drink out of your hands, accidentally spilling the contents all over your date.

“Prongs? What the hell?” You exclaimed in surprise. You immediately cast a cleaning spell on Klaus, apologized to him, and turned to face James with a glare on your face.

“I just-,” James wasn’t sure what he should say.

“You just?” You asked him, annoyed.

James didn’t respond anymore and instead just turned on his heels and fled towards Hogwarts, leaving you flabbergasted. You apologized to Klaus again, but he shrugged and got up, offering you his arm. “I’ll escort you back to the castle,” he said. You hesitated. “We don’t have to go,” you said. Klaus chuckled. “Give him hell, dear,” is all he replied while he grabbed your arm and looped it in his.

“James Fleamont Potter, you absolute twat!” You yelled from the top of your lungs, when you reached the top of the staircase that led towards the portrait. The lady in the portrait gave you a sour look, but opened the door anyway when you said the password.

James heard you from all the way up in his dorm, and winced, waiting for you to barge in any moment, which you did. “Why the bloody hell would you do that?!” You stabbed your finger against his chest.

“I didn’t do it on purpose-“

“Not on purpose?! You just happened to stand behind me and couldn’t control your arm when it shot out and slapped the mug straight in his lap?” You exclaimed in disbelief.

“Well, I didn’t mean for it to spill on him.”

“So what, you just wanted to throw it around?!”

“No, I just tried to stop you from drinki-“ James realized his slip up too late. A shiver ran up his spine at the eerie silence.

“And pray tell, why shouldn’t I be drinking the butterbeer that was meant to be for Klaus?” You calmly asked. James flinched at your sharp tone that came out way louder and less calm than you had intended.

He opened his mouth to answer you with a lie when you cut him off. “And think it through, before you tell me any lies,” you squinted your eyes at him.

If he wasn’t absolutely sure that you would shred him to pieces, he would say that you looked cute like that. Luckily, he knew better.

“Because it contained the Laxative Potion which wasn’t meant for you,” James admitted quietly, his face contorting in anticipation for your outburst that never came. You simply closed your eyes and took a deep breath. “Okay,” you shook your head in a disbelieving and disappointed manner.

“Wait!” James called out before you could open the door to leave. He nervously breathed out when you actually stopped and turned around, your face unreadable.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done it.”

You slowly nodded your head, knowing that James was usually a little bit too proud to apologize so quickly, if at all. “So why did you?”

“Because I’m jealous,” his words came out quiet.

Your eyes softened at him. “Prongs, you’re my best friend, there’s literally nothing to be jealous of. Is this because of what I said at the start of the year? I was kidding, I’m not going to make any new best friends or replace you, I promise,” you comforted him.

James almost laughed to himself in pity. “No, it’s not because of that,” he mumbled. He looked back up at you. “I,” he hesitated. ‘I’m jealous because he gets to date you and don’t.”

You frowned. “What?”

James’ face started to heat up, but he refused to chicken out again. “I think I’m in love with you.” The words knocked your breath out of your lungs.

“What?”

“I’m in love with you.”

“Yeah, no, I heard you the first time but what? No, you said-, you said that we would never be more than friends. Told me to throw those fantasies away because they’d never be real, so I-“

“I know what I said,” James sighed somberly, but he looked at you with pleading eyes. “If I could take it all back, I would.” You looked conflicted but took a step forward and reached out to him with a sigh.

James shook his head. “I promise you I would, because it was stupid and I’m stupid and I lost all chances and oh Godric, now I’m the arsehole who cost you your date, and I do feel bad about it, but I also don’t regret it because I’m selfish,” James started to ramble in a panic and got lost in his thoughts.

His rambling stopped when you wrapped your arms around him in a tight embrace. His heart melted, and he took a deep breath as he closed his eyes, trying to get lost in the feeling. You couldn’t find it in your heart to be so angry with him anymore. Though it was unbelievably immature of him, and the rest of the marauders, no harm was done, and he was sorry.

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled in his shoulder, voice muffled.

“What, why are you sorry?”

“Because I know what it feels like to be in your position,” you sadly smiled at him when you pulled back a little to face him. "And it's shite."

He laighed a little at that and wrapped his arms around you again, pressing you back to his chest, chasing after your touch.

“And you don’t love me anymore?” He couldn’t help but ask. His eyes were trained on the wall behind you as he looked over your shoulder, not quite ready to face you when you would inevitably tell him that you didn't.

You shook your head. “Well, I still love you dearly, James. And I care about you so much, I can’t erase those feelings ‘just like that’ in only one summer break. You’re literally one of the most important people in my life.” You buried your face deeper in his neck. “But no, I don’t think I’m in love with you anymore.” You could feel James nod at your words. They were not coming as a surprise at all.

“So, you’ll date Klaus now?” He asked in a small voice, refusing to let you back away from the hug as he was fighting not to cry in defeat.

“Nah, he’s uh, he’s going on a date with Dave tomorrow,” you shrugged.

“Who’s Dave?” He weakly laughed, a little bit unsure but hopeful, and you shook your head. “The waiter.”

“Oh.”

You pushed James away softly and he reluctantly pulled his arms away from you. His eyes looked a little bit bloodshot, and his nose and lips were red. Something about the sight of him pulled you towards him again, this time you settled your hands on both sides of his cheeks which he leaned in to. You made up your mind.

You leaned in and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I was so in love with you, Jamie,” you whispered to him, and his heart tugged. ‘I know,’ he wanted to say.

“You managed to make me fall in love with you,” you pressed on. “You’ve done it before-,’

“-I can do it again,” James finished, his eyes wide in realization and a wide grin crossed his face. “Will you let me? Try, I mean. Can I try to win you back?”

“Well, no promises, but you can give it your best shot, Jamie.” You laughed. “I mean, you’re my type after all,” you teased him. He puffed his chest at your words, his mind racing because he just got another chance to fix the ending of your story, and he sure as hell was going to give it all he’s got.

“So, starting right now?”

“After you’ve apologized to Klaus.”

“Right, yeah. You reckon we could all go on a double date together?”

“I don’t see why not.”

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@elsie-bells @charlie-weasley-is-underrated @dreamingofmarauders @moonyslibrary98 @wildernessflora @hollandweather @queerqueenlynn @locklyebrainrot @thisrandombitch @grac3aph3lion @earfquak3 @venomsvl @shrekscrustybudassy @middle-of-the-earth @sirene-noir @bettytaylorversion @littlepoisonmushroom @faumpje @iloveutwice @katelebate @moonysupremacy01 @marina468 @fangirl-kimora @bellesowl @badasswlthafatass @sjprongs @armydrcamers @its-a-ittle-bit-cold @ireallywannasleep127 @sayukoi @jsjcue @cashtons-wife @idllyastuff @severegiantjudgefriend @ivy-34 @loudflowerss @moonyunebi @caspianobsessed @laraoverthinks @starsanddream @btsw1fe

@prongsprincessworld @littleshadow17 @prongs-moon @bubybubsters @yeolsbubbles

#james potter x fem!reader #james potter x reader #james potter x y/n #james potter x you #james potter angst #james potter fluff #james potter imagine #james potter fic #james potter fanfic #james potter fanfiction #marauders era #marauders x reader

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lizzieisright · 3 months

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hey hurt/comfort idea:

soo what about the reader and abby being best friends for years and reader always had a crush on abby. they go to a party and abby introduces her new gf to u. she always liked her but thought reader didn’t (always a bit horny around reader, but they know eachother since childhood so abby mistakes readers flirting as being flirty like friends) so reader gets absolutely hartbroken, drinks till she passes out but abby takes care of her ofc. abbys gf is always with her tho so it just hurts even more.

she avoids abby till the next frat prty or smth (maybe it’s college!au) and then they hook up, abby can’t remember cause she’s too drunk and is back w her gf

very messy but i hope u get the idea :P

(also to make it more hurtful make abby mean while she’s drunk bc she’s going through a rough time but isn’t telling anyone)

It took me so long, I'm so sorry

Palestine: what can you do

I've changed a few things (they don't hook up) because I can't deal with cheating, and I couldn't decide on what ending I wanted so there's a poll in the end.

Tags: Modern AU, childhood friends, Angst, pining and unrequited love, of course.

_______________

Abby is a fucking God, and you come to this conclusion when you're 11 and she helps you with your stupid assignment.

When you're both 14 you start to understand that what you feel for her is not, in fact, an admiration.

You come to this conclusion when you sit in her bedroom and she jokes about teaching you how to kiss because you're a loser and you agree - and yeah, the kiss is a mess, but now you both know that you want to kiss girls. And you want to kiss one girl in particular, but Abby is your best friend and you won’t do anything that will lead to losing her.

Being a God means Abby is out of your reach and you have to live with your stupid feelings.

You're jealous of every boy who jokes around her to get her attention.

You're jealous of every girl who dares to look at her a little too long.

Abby is popular and she starts dating and it breaks your heart every time, and you can't look at other people because all your gods look like Abby.

"Why don't you go on a date?" Abby asks once when you're 16 and you're eating pizza in your bedroom, watching another marvel movie. "I think Jen likes you."

"I don't want to." What would be the point if the only person you want to date won't ever look at you this way?

"Why? Don't you get horny like the rest of us mortals?"

The worst part of being in love with your popular best friend is that she recently lost her virginity and she can't shut up about sex because she is excited about it.

"I have my hand, Abby." You roll your eyes at her.

"But it feels better when the other person does it." Abby winks and puts her hand on your thigh. "It's better, isn't it?" She rubs your thigh and your breath hitches. She looks at you, playful, and goes a little up on your thigh, and your face burns.

"You belong in horny jail, Anderson." You laugh, but don't move her hand: if you move it she'll call you a chicken, but she is a chicken enough herself to not move it further.

And she doesn't.

You live your life peacefully, dealing with your feelings as best as you can.

Then college starts and you're too busy to think about Abby 24/7 and you feel like it gets easier. Like you can breathe around her and you almost don't feel pain when she talks about her sex life.

Almost.

You know it's easy to deal with because all those girls in her bed are temporary while you're in Abby's life forever, and not because your feelings suddenly fainted. Abby likes to sleep around, she is a flirt even with you - a lot, actually, she thinks she can get away with a lot by saying she is touch-starved and then her hands wander off somewhere they're not supposed to be, and you let her, because you'll take whatever you can.

So you go through Abby's fuckboy phase with ease, because sex talk is way better than feelings talk.

A few years pass and suddenly the feelings talk starts, and you're slowly dying inside, because Abby likes someone. Abby talks about how nervous she is around her, she is always on her phone texting her, she is always busy when you want to spend time with her.

You hate this girl with all you have, because she takes Abby away, she takes everything away - Abby is not touchy anymore, she only hugs you briefly when you see her, she is not listening to you half of the time, too caught up in her fantasies.

You hope her girl is a bitch and an asshole and toxic so you can talk Abby out of it, but then Abby tells you she is going to introduce you at the party and you cry yourself to sleep that night.

"How do I look?"

"Like you need Jesus." You say honestly because Abby in the muscle tee and a pair of cargo pants makes you ache.

"Yeah?" Abby looks at you through the mirror with that fucking smirk she knows you like. "Am I fuckable?"

"We both know you prefer to be on the other end of that word, Anderson." You roll your eyes and put your shoes on only to straighten up to Abby's face way too close. She looks you up and down.

"You're very fuckable though."

"Fuck off." You huff and open the door of her apartment, hoping she won't tease you for being flustered. "Let's go before Manny gets so drunk you'll have to carry him. Again."

You spent the night in dread of meeting Abby's girl, dreaming of seeing her red flags or something to have a real reason to hate her to Abby's face, but then Abby lights up and she excuses herself to go and meet her girl, while you try so hard to not throw up from your nerves.

The girl is gorgeous.

"This is (y/n)." Abby motions at you and you smile politely. "This is Mia."

"I'm so happy to meet you." Mia smiles and she looks kind and genuine and fuck, you can't hate her. There's no jealousy in her, no fake smiles, no tense body language. "Abby loves you so much."

You swallow hard.

"I put up with so much of her shit, she doesn't have a choice." You joke and Mia laughs.

Mia is funny and cute and you understand why Abby likes her, because it's impossible not to. Mia is a type of girl that you'd think of as a bitch because she is popular, therefore arrogant, but when you get to know her she is a total sweetheart who'd help you find a way to your class if she notices you're lost.

This is hard.

This is going to break you.

You can't cope with this. You can't cope with seeing Abby's gentle gaze on Mia, with her careful touch and constant care. So you excuse yourself and go to the bar to get drunk, as if you can drown your feelings by dragging them to the bottom of the bottle. You dance and you drink, you dance and you drink and repeat it five other times until all long islands make you feel sick and you can't walk by yourself anymore. You're an independent woman and you refuse to ask for help, but when you can't order a taxi for the fifth time because your eyes are so blurry, Mia comes to you and holds you by your elbow.

"We will take you home, okay?" She says kindly and you feel your lips tremble. We.

"Jus- can you c'll a taxi f'me?" You slur, but you feel Abby's hand on your waist as she supports you. "Don't wanna ruin your night."

"You're not ruining anything." Mia says cheerfully and orders a taxi when Abby gives her your address. "Happens to the best of us."

The drive home makes you super dizzy and Abby has to put her hand between your head and the car door because you hit it all the time. The moment the car stops and Abby goes around to help you get on your legs, you throw up on the ground and it's a miracle you don't get everyone's shoes dirty.

Abby decides to carry you to your place and you can't shut up even for a second.

"I'm s'sorry guys. Not a good first impression. I really like you, Mia. You look kind. Like a grandma. In a good way, I'm sorry." Mia giggles. "Your laugh is very cute. It's cute, right Abby?"

"Yeah." Abby agrees quietly and what you don't know is that for her your drunken rant was way cuter than her girlfriend's laugh.

"Yeah. You look great together, I'm s'happy for you Abby. Haven't seen her that nervous because of a girl in years, can you imagine, Mia? You make this asshole nervous." You're chuckling sadly, you want to cry because you don't make Abby nervous.

No, you just embarrass her in front of her girlfriend because you're so pathetically in love you can't deal with it and drink half of the bar until you forget how to walk on your own.

Abby helps you change and Mia gives you water. She makes sure there is fresh air in your room and she tucks your blanket, and you close your eyes to hide your tears because Mia is so nice. She is a dream girl and Abby is so happy and there is no space for you anymore.

Because Mia took your place in that forever equation.

On the next day you text your apologies to both Abby and Mia (she followed you on instagram and asked you how you felt) and you can't deal with this. It hurts so much because you love Abby so much and you want her to be happy but it seems like the price of it is going to be your heart.

So you start avoiding her as best as possible, and what is more sad - it's not even that hard. Abby is always with Mia, fuck, Mia even asks you to come with them to hang out, which you always find an excuse not to. Library, fever, other plans, other plans again, sorry, paper is due tomorrow, my aunt is in town (she is not). Anything to not meet with them.

You still see Abby during classes and you give each other life updates, but it's been weeks since you actually hung out and you accept the reality that yes, there's no place for you in Abby's life anymore.

You cry every fucking night.

Then Abby suddenly remembers you exist and she asks you if you want to hang out, just the two of you, because she misses you. You miss her too and you agree.

You regret it the moment she cuddles you in front of her tv. She has a girlfriend now, why is she so touchy again? Did something happen with Mia that Abby came to you?

"Is everything okay with Mia?"

"Yeah, she is great." Abby says and buries her nose in your neck.

No. You can't deal with this.

So you start avoiding Abby at all costs after this - you can't shake the feeling that this is cheating, because for you Abby's touch has never been platonic, no. And it never felt platonic either, it was always giving you hope because Abby was flirting and touching the way friends don't touch each other. Maybe one day she'd finally give you a chance, you thought, but this day never came.

It is another party a month and half later - yay, Abby and Mia have been together for two months now! - and you don't know if Abby is going to come, but you hope she doesn't. You know she knows something is up and she will want her answers if she meets you.

But you have fun. You play games, you drink, you dance, you get flirted with and you forget about your pain just to get so drunk again you can't help but go outside to find a place to cry in peace.

You miss Abby, you miss her because she is a part of you and yes, you're in love with her, but she also your best fucking friend and you hate yourself for being in love with her, because it ruins your life. It has been ruining your life since you were fourteen and actually understood what you felt, but now it was getting serious.

"(Y/n)?"

Fuck.

You wipe your tears and look at Abby who is standing right in front of you.

"Hi." You squeak and she drops on the knees to look at you.

"Did something happen? Why are you crying?"

"I'm just sad. Don't worry." You try to smile but Abby's frown makes you cry more. "I'm going home anyway, so you can enjoy the party."

"What the hell are you saying? I'm not leaving you."

She should. She should leave you and not complicate it further.

Abby calls a taxi and you chuckle in your head - If you had a nickel for every time Abby was taking your drunk ass home, you'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice.

You tell her as much because the meme is funny and you try to be positive.

Abby helps you out of the car and this time you don't throw up.

"You know, last time I totally embarrassed myself in front of Mia." You chuckle and make your way upstairs with Abby's arm around your waist. "She is cute, I'm so happy for you."

Abby chuckles and leads you inside your apartment, but between the two of you she is mostly sober and she has some questions, and she wants her answers. You know this too, so when you sit on your sofa you feel like all your shields are crumbling: you’re giving up on hiding this from her. If this is the end, so be it.

"You've been avoiding me." Abby says quietly, looking you in your eyes like she is just a little bit mad.

"Yeah, I know." You admit with a chuckle. "You have a girlfriend now, it's so cool. When was the last time you liked someone like that? Back in school?"

"So you've been avoiding me on purpose."

"I don't think you can avoid someone accidentally, Abby.” You say, not holding back your venom. “Anyway, I’m so happy for you.”

“Why are you avoiding me?” Abby moves closer to you and you swallow your tears because there’s nowhere to run.

“Because it’s easier.” You shrug. “I just want you to be happy, okay? Does Mia make you happy?”

“Yeah.” Abby admits and you start crying again: it hurts so fucking much.

“Good. It’s good. I’m happy for you.” You sniffle and Abby huffs, annoyed.

“Stop saying that. Stop avoiding my questions.”

Inside you all hell breaks loose.

“I love you, okay?” You finally burst. “I love you, and it hurts so fucking bad and I can’t fucking see you with her or know that you’re with her! What do you want me to do? What would you do if you were me? I can’t- I can’t-” You throw your hands desperately and bite your lip, too angry with this whole situation.

“I love you too.” Abby says, confused.

“No, no Abby, you don’t understand.” You’re quiet and angry, almost spitting every word out. “I’m in love with you. I’m not jealous as a friend, Abby. I’m jealous because I want to be in her place, okay? Fuck, I wanted to be in your every girl’s place since you started dating girls!”

There is silence. You thought it would be terrifying - this silence - but right now you feel nothing except how dizzy your head is. You feel empty and there's no tears anymore. Abby stares at you in shock, her fists clenched, and you chuckle cynically.

“So can I continue avoiding you now or should I suffer more?”

“Fuck, (y/n)..” Abby sighs and rubs her forehead, going over her face with her palm. “Fuck. Don't do this to me.”

“Well.” You huff, annoyed. “Not like I have a fucking choice, Anderson.”

Abby throws her head back and stares at the ceiling while you do the same, trying to keep your drunk ass stable. You feel like eternity passes before Abby speaks again, and it is strangely comforting, having your best friend here with you, in this boat of pain, and sharing it with her.

“All these years. All these years we could have been together.” Abby sounds like she is mourning.

You thought your heart broke when you met Mia? Forget it, it's broken now.

You sob, howl almost, and Abby is suddenly holding you in her arms, placing kisses to your hair. Her heart can't handle seeing you cry, never could - yes, she tried to move on with Mia, and it worked partially, but all her effort went to shit just now. You're the most precious girl to her and nothing can change it. Abby swallows and braces herself, suddenly making a decision in her head, all her anxiety about what is a right thing to do gone.

“You know what? Fuck it. Fuck all that time we've missed. I'm not letting you go now.” Abby says in your ear and you sob even more violently. “Come on, baby, I'm here. Let me see your face.”

You can't believe it. You can't even process it: is it your drunken dream? Are you hallucinating? It would definitely not be the first time. But you look up at Abby and she gently wipes your tears and there’s so much love and hurt in her eyes it’s hard not to break into another sobbing fit.

“I've been in love with you since we were seventeen.” Abby smiles at you and you shakily smile back. “I’m sorry it came to this. But I'm here now.”

“I love you.” You say feverishly and Abby's restraint breaks.

She kisses you hungrily, practically devouring you, and you're weak, so you return her kiss and press into her, soaking in her warmth and strength. Abby is solid and tender, she holds you like she cares and you cling to her for a moment.

But then you remember yourself and push Abby away, shaking your head.

“No. You're better than this. You're not going to betray Mia like this. I'm not going to let you, Abby. We're not doing this,” You motion between yourself and her. “Behind your girlfriend's back. And I'm also fucking drunk.”

Abby chuckles and kisses your forehead.

“Come on, I'll help you get into your bed.”

Everything else after is a blur as Abby helps you change and covers you with your blanket, and you fall asleep. You can't wait for the morning to come.

****

#abby anderson x reader #abby anderson x you #abby anderson #abby tlou

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daydreaming-paradies · 30 days

Text

Duo Dynamics with HSR Men

ᡣ𐭩 Summary: What is your duo dynamic with HSR men?

ᡣ𐭩 characters: Dr.Ratio(194), Argenti(219), Luka(278), and Gepard(163)

ᡣ𐭩 Warnings: Fluff, Hurt/comfort, crack, Reader being insecure of Love(Aregnti), Unrequired love to required love(Luka), Serval and Pela want to smack someone on the head(Gepard), a little bit of angst

ᡣ𐭩 ~ Want to Continue?~

Dr. Ratio

I hate everybody but you x sunshine

Veritas Ratio’s coworkers notice that Veritas is rude and arrogant towards others but you, the sunshine student under Veritas Ratio. Even Topaz was confused by how Veritas treated you kindly while treating others with arrogance and pride. You always greeted everyone and Veritas with a smile on your face but since Veritas treated you with kindness, everyone has been teasing him nonstop which annoyed Veritas but it was worth it in his opinion. One day, you see Veritas taking care of one of his status, your eyes shine so much and go up to him. “Dr.Ratio!” You called out to him. “You look absolutely exquisite today sir.” The poor man’s heart is about to burst out in cuteness overload for you but he did not show it. “Well thank you,[Y/N]. I know that I am exquisite today but please make sure to turn in your work.” You nod and go off on your merry day. “Jeez Doctor.” Aventurine says with a sly smile. “I never knew IPC’s Sunshine had this much power over you.” Veritas has to hit Aventurine with a book since he nearly exposes the flustered man to Topaz.

Argenti

Believes they don't deserve love x Absolutely down bad

Ah Argenti, the man who sees beauty in everything and everyone. He is the man with love for anything but he is absolutely down bad for you. You on the other hand do not see Love in a positive light. You are often insecure with yourself after a harsh break up with your ex, you unfortunately don't believe that you are undeserving for love. You think to yourself that Agrenti will use you for your body or looks. Argenti knows this and he has every right to understand where you are coming from but he also knows that he is not like your ex. He kept pursuing you, asking for a chance and the dude even says that he will wait for you like a knight would. At first you are wary and harshly reject or ignore him but after a while, you slowly accept Argenti’s advances with a promise to deal with your actions that the red haired man immediately. It does take time but you slowly slowly come to realize that Argenti loves you for you, how Argenti worships you, kisses the ground you walk on. You have decided to give love another chance and ask Argenti out which he happily accepted with an attack of compliments to you. Maybe love is not so bad after all.

Luka

Childhood best friends to lovers

Luka is your childhood best friend and the first friend you had. You two did everything together and even looked up to each other. But sadly, life gets in the way as you have to move away to another city. Luka was heartbroken as he never confessed his love to you but he was determined to wait for you. He kept his promise alright as now as a young man in high school, being all his happy go lucky self when he heard someone call his name. He looked to the source of the voice and he saw you all grow up and pretty, he felt his heart race at the sight of you, He did not know what came up to him. He ran up to you and hugged you tightly, mumbling how he misses you and how life is not the same without you. You were glad how you could see Luka again but you noticed how Luka had that look of longing in his blue eyes, how his hands brushed against yours and he made excuses about it. You had a sneaky feeling that he had a crush on you and you are not going to lie. You also have a crush on him too because he knows you very well unlike the others and to be perfectly honest you want Luka to confess his feelings to you already. You cannot stand this unrequited love but thankfully the aeons are not so mean after all. Luka confessed to you underneath the starry skies of your two’s favorite hang out spot and you tearfully reciprocate his feelings with a kiss on the lips. Ah,young love.

Gepard

Oblivious x Oblivious

If everyone can say one thing about you and Gepard is that you two are so oblivious to each other’s feelings is both funny and facepalm worthy. You two talk about each other all the time and even trying to say that you two don’t probably don't feel the same makes Pela wanna cry and Serval wants to hit someone with her guitar over and over again. It takes you both 4 whole months that you two love each other. “I did not know me and Gepard loved each other.” You told Serval and Pela with Gepard in Serval’s line of sight. “Why does nobody tell us? We should have known this in the first place.” The sight of Pela hitting you with the book and Serval smacking Gepard upside on the head over and over again while chasing him is to this day a funny story nobody can live it down. That is what you two get for being so damn oblivious!

~Taglist: @dailypenpen @purpleqilinwrites @areislol @yoghurtsan @ryuryuryuyurboat @thestarswhisper @windblume-wishes @husky-studies @sanzach / @zaeshi-amatus @mitsvriii @aventxsha @the-guardian-kitsune @asoulsreverie @mccnstruck @snobwaffles @sweetlyvibe @dxmoness @inkybloom-luv

#ཐིཋྀ- daydream’s paradise -ཐིཋྀ #୨୧- daydream’s library #ᰔ- come daydream again #𖤍-honkai star rail #honkai star rail imagines #hsr x reader #argenti x reader #gepard x reader #dr. ratio x you #hsr luka x reader #argenti x y/n #argenti x you #dr. ratio x reader #gepard x you #hsr Luka x y/n

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evangelical04 · 2 months

Text

A Single Daffodil || 2

Summary: Getting arranged to be married to your long-time crush wasn't exactly the fairy tale romance you were hoping for. Nor is the dynamic of the marriage, with your husband treating you like you don't exist. But you're going to make this work, whether he cares about you or not. And he definitely doesn't...right?

Pairing: Min Yoongi x Reader

Rating: 18+ minors DNI

Word Count: 9.1K

Genre: angst, romance, unrequited love, smut, enemies to lovers, arranged marriage au, businessman yoongi

Warnings: parental trauma, sibling trauma, toxic parents, unrequited love, explicit language, alcohol usage, yoongi's kind of mean, future smut

Author's Note: hi everyone! it's currently exactly 2am for me lol but I wanted to get this chapter out today! i was hoping to having the wedding happen but I like it more for the next chapter. all the support has been so overwhelming and amazing, thank you guys so much for all the love!! i appreciate it so much and I'm grateful that you all are so supportive, especially for my first ever fic. i really hope you guys enjoy this chapter! also, just let me know if you want to be added or removed from the taglist!

Taglist:

@yoongisducky @kam9404 @sumzysworld @tarahardcore @viankiss @babystarcandylovejk @ktownshizzle @futuristicenemychaos @igot7fairlyoddparents @baechugff @pb89nv @peachytokki @ratherbfangirling

previous / masterlist / next

You could feel your eyes glazing over with the amount of time you’d spent staring at your computer screen. A quick glance at the clock showed that only a couple hours had passed since you’d arrived at work, and a devastating thirty minutes remained until your lunch break. Rubbing at your tired eyes, you tried to find the energy to resume reviewing the materials your team had sent you, but you came up short.

The wedding planning had been taking a lot out of you the past couple of months, even though your mother wasn’t letting you decide anything for it anyway. She had been quite clear that all you had to do was show up and that your input wouldn’t be needed. You couldn’t honestly say you had an issue with that, this didn’t feel like your wedding anyway. If it were yours, you would’ve been getting married to someone you love, and crucially, someone who loves you in return.

But that wasn’t in the cards for you and you knew that well, so you went along with your mother’s planning placidly, agreeing to almost everything she mentioned and getting ignored on things you didn’t. It left you exhausted, both physically and emotionally. It felt like an out-of-body experience every time your mother pulled you into another appointment for your dress fittings or makeup and hair test runs. You could feel yourself simply going through the motions and just waiting until the appointment was done so you could return to your mundane life.

Not much else had changed, honestly. You were still working, hanging out with your friends on occasion, reading in bed, and watching television in the evenings. The only thing looming over you was the date of the wedding, now only six months away. It felt like an omen, always hovering near you, spiking your heart rate, and making you sweat.

Even your team had noticed your heightened anxiety and expressed their worries to you, especially the youngest, Choi Song Ha. She was a cute, young thing, a fresh face in the industry that you had quickly taken under your wing once you had set eyes on her in the new recruit orientation you visited just over a year ago now. You knew just how quickly the gaming industry ate up and spat out women like clockwork and you didn’t want the same fate for her, so you’d snatched her up into your team. She truly felt like the little sister you’d never had and your bond quickly grew over the months since you’d met. She had picked up on your dampened mood and resolved to leave you small treats of a chip bag or chocolates on your desk every other day or so as a means to cheer you up. She knew you well enough to know you wouldn’t appreciate outright signs of concern or making a scene at work, and you loved her for it.

She had left you a small red ginseng jelly this morning with a doodle of a grumpy cat stuck to it on a post-it note. It made you smile every time you glanced at it.

It kind of reminded you of Yoongi. The two of you hadn’t talked since that night in the restaurant, and you weren’t sure if you even wanted to talk to him. Your mother had given you his number and you’d saved it, but you hadn’t made any move to message him.

“Team leader?”

You turned, snapping out of your daze to face another one of your team members, Yeonsik.

“Yes, Yeonsik,” you responded, trying to appear calm and collected, and not like you were just thinking about your soon-to-be husband who hates you.

“We have the materials from the character graphics department for Plan C ready, it’s in your inbox now. They said that they’re ready to make any changes you want, but they’re worried about the deadline for the second draft,” Yeonsik rambled. He was a nice man, only a few years younger than you, and quite passionate about his job since joining your team two years back, just after you’d become the team lead of Planning Group 1. He had a handsome face with longer, dark hair and bright eyes that were eager to please.

“Okay, thanks for letting me know. Also, good job on keeping Graphics 2 on track, I know they’ve been giving us a hard time with getting the updated designs over. Thanks again,” you said politely, sending him a small smile. Yeonsik beamed in response and returned to his seat happily. You chuckled fondly at his antics before opening the file he’d sent. You loved your team members and you held a high respect for them. You knew you led them well and that they respected you in return. It was a small team, consisting of only five people, including you, but you were content with the group and the dynamic. You often went out for drinks together after work, usually followed by karaoke and at least one member passing out, most often Yeonsik, who would then be picked up by his boyfriend. You were a close-knit group and you couldn’t imagine a better job.

Slowly, Mrs. Min’s words crept back into your mind at the thought of how much you loved your position. Surely, Yoongi wouldn’t expect you to quit your job? You wouldn’t be able to bear it.

No, he said that he would do his thing and you would do yours, you reminded yourself. That’s right, you’d agreed that you wouldn’t interfere in each other’s lives. Except, you hadn’t really agreed, had you? You’d just acquiesced because he’d been in the motion of leaving anyway. You weren’t really sure if that’s what you’d wanted, living separate lives and being married only on paper.

Yoongi’s words rang clear in your head as you gnawed on your lower lip, was this really how this marriage was going to be? The two of you not even acknowledging each other except at galas and parties where you had to appear married? You didn’t want that.

But…if Yoongi did, how much say did you really have? As much as you wanted to make this work, it had to be a two-way street. If Yoongi didn’t want anything to do with you, you would have to accept that and just try to get through this the best you could. You had said to Joohee that day you’d found out, that there’s nothing you can do to stop him.

It felt painful to come to terms with, especially in the environment of your office where you still had to appear professional. Thankfully, you breathed, none of your team members had noticed your mini-mental breakdown.

Your phone buzzed with a new message from Yujin, your mother’s assistant.

From Yang Yujin

Hello Miss Y/N,

Your mother has asked me to confirm your three attendees for your wedding invitations. The invitations will be sent out on Friday night, so please send your three names with their contact information and address to me by then. If possible, please send it at least one day beforehand as Mrs. Seo would like to review them before I send the invitations out.

Additionally, she has set up another meeting for you with Mr. Min Yoongi on Friday, at 6 pm. Please find the location details below.

Please let me know if you need any other information,

Yang Yujin

You sighed, reading over the email again. For one, you honestly didn’t even know who you’d want to invite. You didn’t really have that many friends outside of Joohee, your colleagues, and Jung Hoseok, your friend from college. You knew that Joohee would already be invited, but you weren’t sure about Hoseok. He wasn’t a part of the same social circle as you and Joohee, especially since he didn’t come from a richer family, but you’d met him in college and introduced him to Joohee soon after. The three of you had been practically inseparable during your undergrad but after graduation, the three of you hadn’t met up in person in a while, with Hoseok in Busan for work. You tapped your chin thoughtfully with the eraser end of a pencil, maybe you should send an invite to Hoseok. Suddenly, another thought occurred to you, making the pencil drop from your fingers and onto your lap.

You hadn’t even told Hoseok about Yoongi!

“Damn,” you muttered, making a mental note to call him later today. You’d figure out the other invites later. Your eyes drifted to the second part of the email.

Another meeting, huh? It sounds like it’ll be just the two of us this time. I wonder if he’ll be any different.

A rap of knuckles against your desk brought your attention back in front of you. Song Ha stood beside your chair, looking at you curiously, “It’s lunch, Team Leader. Want to grab something with the team downstairs?”

Shit, you had agreed to grab lunch with Joohee today.

“No, Miss Choi, I’ll be meeting a friend of mine. But you all enjoy your lunch!”

“Alright, have fun!”

The team slowly filed out, discussing amongst themselves what they’d get from the cafeteria today. You almost longed to go with them, but you knew you had to tell Joohee about the email you got.

You could feel a headache coming on.

Sighing, you stood and gathered your things into your tote bag, never having liked purses, and started the walk towards the elevators to reach the quaint cafe across the street you and Joohee liked to frequent.

You had arrived before Joohee, which was to be expected with your office right across and decided to grab a table for both of you. Setting your tote bag in the seat beside you, you read the email once more on your phone. It dragged another sigh out of you before you almost jumped into the air at the sound of Joohee’s voice.

“What’s got you so melancholy?’

You breathed out to calm your heart rate from the mini jumpscare and looked up at her. She was dressed a bit more formal than you in a light blue blouse and dark navy dress pants that fell gracefully in silk around her long legs with a maroon purse hanging from her shoulder. Her office was much more formal than yours, working under her father. Your own office often had team leaders and higher-ups in jeans, the nature of your work making it more casual, so you contrasted her in a simple black sweatshirt and blue jeans.

“I have to meet Yoongi again on Friday.”

“God damn.”

You nodded somberly as she took her seat across from you, “You remember what happened last time? Why does it feel like he’s gonna eat me alive this time?”

Joohee looked at you suggestively, wiggling her eyebrows.

You recoiled, shooting her a glare, “Good God, woman, not like that.”

Joohee relented, waving her hands in surrender, “Okay, well, assume he’ll be the same. Then you won’t be caught off guard. But I think you should still try to get through to him. Maybe, at the very least, you guys can become friends.”

You hummed in agreement, what she was saying made sense. You weren’t exactly hoping for a rom-com drama-like romantic relationship, but being friends wouldn’t be so bad.

A waiter arrived, taking your drink and food orders, and you and Joohee fell back into easy conversation about your jobs and other small gossip. As much as you were trying to pay attention to what Joohee was saying, you couldn’t help your mind returning to Yoongi and his dark eyes scrutinizing you and his cold, biting voice.

“Y/N?”

You focused back into Joohee and her concerned stare dug into you, “What?”

“Are you still thinking about Yoongi?”

You nodded, looking away. You felt bad for not listening to her especially when she had basically given you a solution to your anxiety regarding Friday. You heard her sigh before speaking.

“Listen, Y/N, you can’t stop how he’s going to behave towards you. You can only control how you respond. I think your best bet is to try to tell him you’re not expecting him to treat you like a wife, but you want him to treat you like a friend. Unless that isn’t what you want.”

“No, it is,” you said, keeping yourself from burying your head in your hands, “And you’re right, that’s all I can do. Why didn’t you become a therapist, again?”

Joohee only grinned in response, “I’m too pretty.”

Joohee’s words from earlier echoed in your head for the rest of the workday. Did you really want him to treat you like a friend? Or something more?

You weren’t sure. Of course, you had this half-crush, half-infatuation with the man since you’d met him when you were younger, but marriage was a totally different game. Were you really ready to spend the rest of your life with a man you were attracted to but he couldn’t feel the same?

Maybe he could.

You knocked that thought away as soon as it entered your mind, you shouldn’t be getting your hopes up. You knew that Yoongi was less than happy about the situation and the unfavorable circumstances would only serve to further distance him from you. You would have to be okay with just being friends if that.

As you paced around your apartment later that night, you stopped in front of your dresser in your bedroom. In the third drawer from the top was the handkerchief that Yoongi had given you when you were younger. You had kept it meaning to give it back to him, but you had barely seen him since then, let alone had a moment in private to give it to him.

Most of your interactions had been minimal conversations at parties and galas, often accompanied by Joohee and Seokjin. You couldn’t recall a time when Yoongi had actually talked to you directly in any of those scenarios. So why did your crush persist?

Maybe it was the innocence of your first meeting, the cliche of it all. You, small, sad, and alone, and Yoongi, showing up like your knight in shining armor. You had had a fascination with him since then, always trying to seek out his silhouette or pitch-black hair at gatherings afterward. Yet, he never approached you alone, nor did you make an attempt to do so yourself. You had called it an infatuation with Joohee because it really was, you didn’t really know anything about him, much less had a full conversation with him. Even when you were in a group with him, Seokjin, and Joohee, he would barely acknowledge you.

Not that he was obligated to.

You fell back onto your bed and stared up at the ceiling, letting out a soft grunt when you hit the mattress. Would you be able to survive actually getting to know Yoongi? Your greatest fear was that you would fall in love with him, you were basically already primed for it. And that would not work out, you knew that, and you refused to consider any other outcome.

You couldn’t afford to get your hopes up.

Turning on your side, you could feel your thoughts drift to your few interactions with him growing up. He had always been polite, but cold. The most he’d said to you was a curt greeting and the barest of small talk. The only other interactions you’d really had were your first meeting and hearing about his escapades through the grapevine, mainly Joohee. Nonetheless, you found yourself infatuated, your eyes finding his slightly round cheeks and pouty lips inevitably. What would life be like once you got married?

You tried to imagine yourself in a domestic setting with Yoongi but quickly shut that down, that would only bring up unwanted feelings. You considered whether or not he would continue seeing other people after you were married. Joohee had said it was very possible. Would you be able to handle it? Joohee had suggested that you fool around a bit yourself but you had quickly dismissed that. Cheating was something you would never tolerate in a relationship, from the other person or from yourself. You knew that the reality would be different in your situation, but you still refused to let yourself stray from Yoongi.

Not that you hadn’t tried in the past. You had been in only two relationships leading up to now, one in college and another as a short burst after graduation. It all felt pointless when you knew you wouldn’t get to choose who you spent the rest of your life with. It was an agony that, along with other factors, ended both of your relationships. Mina had been a bright spot in your life, but she couldn’t deal with the fact that you were not only not out to your parents, but that you would likely not be able to be with her long term anyway. There had been other signs that the relationship wouldn’t work out, and you had tried to remain friends but it didn’t pan out past college.

The relationship after college that had only lasted a few months was with Jaehyun, a sweet man who had been your coworker at your first job out of college. He was very kind to you and you felt comfortable in his presence, but you couldn’t handle the guilt of going out with him while knowing he wouldn’t be the one you marry. To his credit, he had been very understanding when you’d broken down in front of him in a guilt-fueled spiral. He’d held you until you calmed down, wiped your tears, and squeezed you tight before leaving, stating that you could always call him if you needed anything. You still messaged him sometimes, and you remained firm that if you did get to choose who to marry, he would be your first choice.

The arranged marriage had been looming over your life since you were old enough to understand the importance of status to your family. You were sure Yoongi’s family was the same. You were both expected to keep your duty to your family, a repayment for the comfortable life you both had lived. Once or twice you had considered telling your parents you wouldn’t go through with it when the time came, but you knew that it would only result in you having to pay them back for everything they had ever given money towards for you. Even though you’d gotten multiple scholarships for college, your parents insisted you go to a prestigious university that rarely gave any money to their students because they knew their parents would have wide-open wallets. There was no way you’d ever be able to pay that back in your lifetime, especially with your current job.

So you were stuck. But you knew you weren’t really all that unhappy. While the circumstances weren’t what you preferred, you couldn’t deny the small excitement that you felt at the prospect of being able to have a relationship with Yoongi. The caveat to that was also knowing that he was an entirely unwilling participant in this situation, which wasn’t really going to work to your advantage. You were set on remaining a realist, refusing to consider the idea that Yoongi might come to love you. It felt like you didn’t have much of any other choice. Everything about this entire situation made you feel like a passive observer, someone with no impact or voice, which wasn’t far from the truth. You imagined Yoongi was much the same.

Distantly, you wondered how many people Yoongi was allowed to invite to the wedding.

Speaking of! You had almost forgotten to call Hoseok, and it was getting late. You scrambled to reach for your phone, stretching your arm out to the nightstand where your phone sat, and grasping it. Dialing his number, you registered how low his contact was on your recent calls. You really needed to call him more often. Hitting his contact, you waited for the ringing to start. He answered rather quickly, which surprised you, as he was usually an early sleeper.

“Hey, Y/N! It’s been a while.”

“Yeah, it has. I missed you. Hobi,” you said, not realizing how much you meant it until the words left your mouth. It really had been too long since you’d called.

“What’s up? You don’t sound too happy. Is everything okay,” he questioned, and your heart warmed at his concerned nature. He was always able to read you well, better than Joohee sometimes.

“Yeah, everything’s fine I guess. I’m getting married, actually.”

The other end of the line was silent for a bit before you heard Hoseok let out a breath and speak, “Oh, wow. Okay. How are you feeling?”

You choked out a laugh, “You’re not even asking who I’m marrying?”

“Well, I know that it’s not someone you chose. So I want to know how you’re doing. When did you find out?”

Your laughter died at his serious nature, your attempt at lightening the mood unsuccessful, “About two months ago. The wedding’s in around six. Want an invite? I get a whole three guests of my own choosing.”

He chuckled softly at that, “Of course I do, you know I’ll be there. But seriously, how are you feeling about this?”

You almost sighed at his unwillingness to let you escape his question, “I don’t know, honestly. I really don’t. I think I’m weirdly at peace with it? I’ve been expecting it for so long and now it’s finally happening. Plus, it being Min Yoongi isn’t exactly the worst thing ever.”

You could hear his surprise over the phone, “Min Yoongi? Like your crush of almost two decades, Min Yoongi?”

You groaned, responding, “Jeez, way to remind me how old I am. Yes, that Min Yoongi. He’s definitely not as okay with it as I am though.”

“What do you mean?”

You recounted the past meeting with his family to Hoseok while he patiently listened and interrupted occasionally to provide his own thoughts. When you finished, you could practically see him falling back against his desk chair, exhaling a burst of air.

“Well, that’s a lot.”

You let out a short laugh, “Yeah, that’s been my life for the past couple of months.”

“I think Joohee gave you some good advice. I’d probably say something similar to you. Try to make the most of the situation but don’t expect a lot from him. I don’t want you getting hurt.”

You nodded, even though he couldn’t see you, “Yeah, you’re probably right. But, enough about me, how are you doing? How’s work?”

Hosek launched into recapping how busy the dance school he taught at had been lately and the gossip surrounding his coworkers. You felt yourself relax more into the conversation and slowly forget your troubling feelings surrounding Yoongi.

You would deal with those come Friday.

It was Friday. You made sure to leave work a bit early, giving you enough time to run back to your apartment to change and look presentable. You had chosen your outfit with Joohee’s help the night prior. You were meeting at a relatively fancy restaurant but it was more of a bar, so you didn’t want to be too formal. You had opted for a green dress with a small flower print since you were coming off the winter months into spring. Your dress was an A-line cocktail dress with a square neckline and puffed sleeves that cinched at your wrist. You’d had it for a while and knew how it looked on you, and you knew you would feel comfortable in it tonight. The last thing you needed weighing on your mind was getting in your head about how you looked, which you usually felt nauseous from.

With it approaching six, you quickly finished up some minimal makeup, topped it off with a lip tint, and tried your best to make your hair look presentable after what was a long day of work. A glance at your watch told you that you didn’t have much time left, so you rushed to your car, almost forgetting your small purse, and started your drive over to the restaurant. You didn’t want to be late and make a bad impression on Yoongi, although you didn’t know if his impression of you could get any worse.

After you arrived and were sat at your table, you checked your phone to see the time and were relieved to note that you were a couple of minutes early. You felt yourself relax into the booth and started taking slow, calming breaths to slow down your racing heartbeat. The adrenaline of trying to get to the restaurant on time was starting to fade and you took another glance at your watch.

6:06

Well, that’s fine. He’s probably just a little late, you tried to reassure yourself, but you had a sinking feeling. As the minutes marched on, the sinking feeling grew deeper, and you could feel yourself growing slightly annoyed.

6:29

Well, whatever.

You took out your phone from your purse and decided to message him. It should be reasonable, right? You had scheduled this beforehand, after all. Well, not you, your mother, but still, the principle held.

You:

Hi Yoongi-ssi, this is Seo Y/N. I’m waiting at the restaurant at the moment

and I was wondering if you were alright, since you weren’t here yet? Please let me know if you’d like to reschedule instead.

You winced at how the text message sounded more like an email between colleagues, but you weren’t sure how casual you were supposed to be with him. Before you could mull over the tone of your message more, you hit the send button and bit your lip as you waited for a response. Your fingers began to pick at your dress in a nervous habit and you kept your eyes trained on the restaurant entrance in case you spotted him.

Finally, at 6:42, you saw the head of black hair that had haunted your dreams as of late. He walked in calmly, looking slightly disheveled, but his lax pace didn’t betray anything about his tardy entrance. He looked infuriatingly attractive in a well-fitted suit with the tie loosened and the top couple of buttons undone. His eyes met yours as the hostess led him to your table and you smiled politely at him, receiving only a cursory nod in return. The waitress quickly approached as he sat down across from you and took his drink order, two fingers of whisky, while you asked for more water. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to drink, more that you needed to keep your wits about you for this dinner and alcohol would only make you feel nauseous in your already anxious state.

With the waitress gone, he turned to you and you felt yourself flush automatically, something you internally cursed. You wished he didn’t have such an effect on you. He declined to say anything, so you took a moment to take in his appearance now that he was much closer to you.

You could see that his collar was more rumpled than you initially thought and his hair a bit more mussed. You saw a small mark just barely visible from beneath his white button-up, above his tie. Now that he was much closer, you could smell a faint scent of a sweet perfume that you knew wasn’t yours since you had only worn a very light citrus one.

Oh. He was with someone else. Why does that bother me so much?

Finally, he spoke, his deep voice lulling you out of your trance of staring at the mark on his chest, “Sorry I’m late. I saw your text, but I was driving. To be completely honest, I forgot about this.”

For a moment, his apology surprised you. For some reason, you hadn’t expected him to apologize. Maybe you’d built him up to be this cartoon villain in your head after your last interaction, but you’d forgotten that he was human just like you.

“That’s alright, it’s no problem,” you responded kindly, noting the way his eyebrow slightly furrowed at your response, “How was your day?”

He raised an eyebrow at you in a questioning manner, “Are you really going to do small talk with me?”

You let out an embarrassed laugh at your failure to engage him and tried for a new tactic instead, “Okay, what would you like to talk about then?”

“I want to set some ground rules.”

Your surprise must’ve shown on your face because you saw the way his expression almost changed to amusement. You quickly shook off the abruptness of the statement and nodded your head, “Okay, like what?”

“First, you’ll be moving into my apartment. I’m sure your mother already told you,” you nodded, “Do not enter my bedroom or office without knocking. I’ll extend the same courtesy to you. Second, we keep our lives separate. Unless we need to appear at an event together, we shouldn’t be mingling our private lives, including friends, work, things like that. Thirdly, this marriage is going to be on paper only. Don’t expect me to treat you like my girlfriend, or my wife, because we both know that’s not what this is.”

You felt your teeth take in your bottom lip as you considered his words, “Okay, that’s fine, I guess.” You couldn’t really stop him from wanting to do that, but it still hurt some. Any hopes you had of getting a normal romantic relationship after this were quickly dashed by his next rule.

“Lastly, I want this to be open. Our parents aren’t pressuring us for kids, so we can both find relief elsewhere. We both know this is only for increased stocks and influence in our respective companies. So, I do whatever I want and you do whatever you want in that regard, and we don’t interfere in each other’s love lives.”

You felt your face fall a bit, but you tried to control your expression. You had prepared for this, Joohee had prepared you for this. So why were you still so upset? He’s giving you the go-ahead to find whoever you want, so it’s not technically cheating. So why does it still feel so wrong?

“Okay,” you said uneasily, “That’s all okay.” It felt like you were saying it more for yourself than for him.

His eyebrow quirked once more. They were very expressive, you noticed.

“That’s it? You don’t have any rules of your own you want to add in?”

Your hands clenched onto the edge of the booth seat, needing something to ground you. Rules of your own? Your head was swimming with everything that had just happened, you could barely think of anything else, “No, none I want to add.”

Yoongi leaned back and clasped his hands, “Alright then. Shall we eat? My dad’s technically paying so eat all you want.”

You shakily took hold of the menu you’d already looked over a hundred times while waiting for him, not wanting to appear rude by being on your phone. You had already chosen what dish you wanted when Yujin had sent you the restaurant name, a habit of yours being to look up the menu beforehand to choose. The waitress approached and took your orders, taking the menu from your hands, leaving you with nothing to grasp your quivering fingers onto.

You looked over at Yoongi, seeing him on his phone, scrolling. You felt yourself blanch at the blatant disregard and couldn’t find it in yourself to try and start a conversation.

The minutes passed by slowly, and you were barely relieved when the food came, providing momentary respite by giving you something to do. You felt like you’d never been in a more awkward situation. The waitress quickly refilled both your drinks, and you noted that Yoongi had ordered water this time. It must be because he’s driving.

Soon, the both of you finished your food, in utter silence. The waitress, who was quite on top of her game, swiftly provided the bill and told you to take your time. You had a feeling she felt the awkward tension as much as you did.

Once the bill was paid, you and Yoongi walked out towards the parking lot where he started shifting to move in the direction of his car before you blurted out, “Wait!”

He turned, facing you with a bored expression, waiting for you to finish speaking.

“I do have a rule actually.”

Seeming slightly intrigued now, he gestured for you to continue.

“I want us to try and be friends. Please.”

He seemed slightly surprised, judging by the way his eyebrows lifted slightly and his mouth parted. Collecting himself, he looked directly into your eyes, his dark orbs boring into your own, “No. I want us to keep our lives completely separate. We’re not friends.”

With that, he turned around and walked to his car, not sparing you another glance.

“Wow, what an asshole.”

You hummed lazily in agreement, feeling your head lull. You were already a bottle deep in more cheap Moscato with Joohee, as well as a couple of shots of strawberry soju.

“I know right! I agreed to whatever he said, why couldn’t he agree with the one thing I asked for?”

Joohee winced and prepared herself for your buzzed anger that was sure to flare up at her next statement, “Well, he wasn’t exactly wrong. It did conflict with his other rule. Not that I think he’s justified either. There shouldn’t be a problem in being friends.”

Your head snapped towards her, seeing it as a defensive move for Yoongi in your half-drunken state, but before you could find the energy to get upset, you felt yourself melt further into the couch, “Yeah, you’re right, I guess. Whatever, I don’t need him. I’ll just fuck anyone who looks my way, instead.”

“No, you won’t.”

“No, I won’t,” you cried, collapsing onto the pillow beside you, squeezing it tight, “Why am I so pathetic?”

“You’re not,” Joohee cooed, “You’re just in a shitty situation. So is he, but at least you’re not being a dick about it.”

You nodded glumly, still not feeling better about the situation. As you cradled the now-empty wine bottle to your chest, you remembered Hoseok.

“Oh yeah, I invited Hobi for the wedding. My coworker, Song Ha too. Can you believe I couldn’t think of a third person?”

Joohee laughed before throwing herself onto the couch with you, “Hey, you don’t need other friends, you have me. Besides, we’ll all be together again, then! It feels like forever since we’ve seen him.”

“Yeah, I told him and he said the same stuff as you. To try and make the best of it, or whatever,” you could feel yourself becoming less and less sober, “Can I crash here tonight?”

“Of course, do you want me to wash your dress for you?”

“No, I’ll just do it at my place. Thank God I have you.”

Joohee only laughed loudly in response, getting up to grab another bottle of soju from the fridge. The two of you lounged around before moving to watch TV in Joohee’s bed where she promptly fell asleep. Soothed by her snoring, you relaxed into her comfortable mattress and traced the light extrusions on her ceiling. Your thoughts soon drifted to Yoongi, as they seemed to do often these days.

Was he really fair in rejecting your friendship? Joohee had made a good point earlier in that it certainly conflicted with his rule of ignoring each other outside of obligated functions. But…you didn’t want that. So why did you agree? In the moment, it hadn’t really felt like you’d had another choice. You seemed to be feeling like that a lot lately.

Yoongi seemed serious about this marriage being for business only and you knew that you didn’t want that, but you couldn’t exactly tell him as such. You couldn’t be more sure that he would only be disgusted if he heard you say that and you didn’t think you’d be able to survive seeing that kind of emotion on his face when it’s directed towards you.

Not that you’d be able to survive this marriage either.

Your fingers toyed with the frayed hem of the sleep shorts you’d borrowed from Joohee, a frequent occurrence whenever you stayed over, and you saw her shift in her sleep. She really had been so supportive throughout this whole thing.

Maybe you should go to her brother for help? No, Yoongi would probably hate that.

You resisted the urge to kick your feet in frustration out of fear of waking up Joohee. This was so difficult, it was next to impossible to figure out what your next move should be.

You had a nagging feeling that your mother wouldn’t force you to meet up with Yoongi anymore before the wedding, but why did that not feel like a clear-cut win? Did you want to meet with Yoongi again?

Rubbing at your eyes frantically, you pushed aside the flurry of questions stirring inside you. You didn’t have time to deal with this. There was a large project at work that was in its final stages that you needed your full attention on and then the final beta tests before the official launch, just weeks before your wedding. You couldn’t afford to spend another moment thinking about Yoongi.

As you got more comfortable in Joohee’s bed, you turned your head to face the clock on her bedside table, reading 3:09 AM.

A sigh escaped your lips as you forced your eyes closed to try and get some rest.

You had an inkling that Yoongi would be occupying your thoughts whether you wanted it or not.

“We’ll be meeting for the rehearsal dinner in one week, Yujin will send you the information and instructions. Don’t be late.”

Your mother’s voice cut off after that, not bothering to say goodbye before ending the call. You could feel your headache coming back and you fumbled for your water bottle before getting up to grab a red ginseng packet from the breakroom. Things had been a lot lately.

The final preparations for the wedding were underway and your mother was leaving nothing to chance. Your dress had been fitted to perfection with your mother sending you a strict diet and workout plan to make sure you stayed the exact same size until the wedding. That email had been swiftly archived.

You weren’t even sure of who was in your bridal party other than Joohee being your maid of honor. Not that it mattered. This wedding wasn’t for you anyway.

As you slowly sucked out the paste from the ginseng packet, leaning against the break room counter, you wondered if Yoongi had had to go through similar procedures, though likely less extensive. You hadn’t heard from him since that dinner where he’d firmly placed a boundary between you, but he’d rarely left your mind since. You’d hoped that the reality check with Yoongi might help clear you of your feelings for him, but, instead, they only deepened your desire to get to know him better, to break past that boundary. But you knew that those ideas were merely fairy tales and this marriage was not going to be one by any means.

Distantly, you wondered how the ceremony would go. The two of you hadn’t prepared any vows, nor were you expected to. This wedding was not a show of love and everyone knew that. Your parents weren’t concerned with making it appear as though you and Yoongi were a loving couple, no, this wedding was more of an excuse to show off their wealth and influence. Your nuptials were merely a byproduct. Still, would you have to kiss Yoongi?

You quickly shook your head, trying to rid yourself of the mental image, feeling your cheeks flush hot. Yet, you couldn’t get it out of your head. You imagined his lips would be soft and gentle, that he would lead you through the kiss and deepen it for more. His hands would come to rest at your waist before encircling it, pulling you closer, flush, to his body.

No! You can’t imagine that, you’re not allowed!

Internally, you scoffed. What kind of girl wasn’t allowed to imagine kissing her fiance? You knew the truth, however, that it wasn’t your place to imagine yourself in that position. That was reserved for the person he loved, who was, decidedly, not you.

Tossing the packet, you made your way back to your way back to your desk. Settling into the pillowed surface of your chair, you browsed through your emails before noticing one from the marketing team.

From: [email protected]

RE: MIRA’S AWAKENING Influencer Advertising

Hello Team Leader Seo,

We have decided that we would like to reach out to online influencers and streamers to assist in promoting Project Mira’s Awakening. A list of possible candidates is attached, along with their profiles and viewer analytics. We would like your input on any public figures you believe may be good candidates for this endeavor. Please reach out if you and your team come up with any candidates that are not already included in the attached file.

Additionally, we would like to create merchandise to provide for these public figures and we need to confirm with you and Graphics Team 2 on graphics we can include on merchandise items. You will find a list of items we are looking to make, along with graphics suggestions, attached as well. Please coordinate with GT 2 to send over finalized ideas and start creating the images.

Thank you,

Team Leader Lim

You considered the contents, feeling the eraser of your pencil tap against your lip, who could you suggest? You had your favorite streamers, but none aligned that well with the nature of the game you were producing, which meant the viewer base wouldn’t have enough crossover with your target audience. Running through a list of the streamers you watched regularly in your head, you stopped at one in particular.

Goldenboy97.

Jeon Jeongguk was quite popular and played enough combat-based games to have sufficient audience crossover, while still being intriguing for the puzzle aspect of the game. Not that you were biased, but he was your favorite creator at the moment. You jotted down his handle and a note to ask the rest of your team about their thoughts.

Leaning back in your chair, you stared blankly at the screen as the emails continued flooding in. Slowly, but surely, your thoughts drifted back to the phone call with your mother. The wedding was next week, with the rehearsal dinner only being seven days away.

You felt a strange combination of dread and giddiness, a swirl of emotional turmoil you weren’t ready to unpack. Hoseok was coming back tonight and you were picking him up from the train station. You’d probably have time to process your emotions then. Hoseok was staying at your apartment in the guest bedroom for a couple of weeks so he could be there through the whole wedding process. He had also mentioned looking for an apartment to move into in Seoul, which made you excited. You really wanted to have the college dream team together again.

The thoughts of the actual wedding were stoking your nerves, you still hadn’t talked to Yoongi since the last time you’d met. You weren’t sure of the protocol or if you should try to talk to him beforehand, especially about the ceremony. Too cowardly to act on your anxiety, you shut off your opened messaging app on your phone. You weren’t keen on finding out how Yoongi would respond to an unprompted message.

The sound of your team packing up alerted you to the time, being slightly past five. You joined them in getting ready to leave before heading to the elevator. The rest of the group trekked slightly ahead while Song Ha walked slightly slower to stay back with you.

“So, the wedding is next week. Are you excited?”

You chuckled nervously, “Yeah, you could call it that.”

“Ah, are you nervous? Makes sense. Just think, though, soon, you’ll be married to the love of your life! How exciting!”

Your insides felt queasy. You hadn’t told Song Ha about the nature of your relationship with your betrothed because you weren’t exactly sure how to explain it to someone who wasn’t familiar, nor did you want to deal with the embarrassment, “Yeah, I guess so.”

“Where are you going for your honeymoon?”

You bit your lip, “Nowhere, actually. We couldn’t get time off of work at the same time.” The honeymoon had long been decided as an unnecessary expense, and neither you nor Yoongi complained. Being stuck with him for weeks after the wedding in another country sounded like a nightmarish situation. You wouldn’t have minded a vacation though.

“Gosh, that sucks. Hopefully, you’ll be able to do something over the summer, maybe,” Song Ha pouted, swinging her work bag in line with her step. You smiled at her naivete.

“Yeah, hopefully.”

“Hobi!”

You ran towards the taller man, throwing your arms around his upper body, “I missed you! It feels so nice to have you back in Seoul.”

Feeling his chest rumble with a laugh, you squeezed him harder before releasing him.

“Feels good to be back too,” he responded, a bright, heart-shaped smile adorning his face, “Let me get my bags to your car.”

“Oh, right, let me help,” you nodded, reaching for the bigger suitcase to roll towards your car. Hoseok easily picked up the duffel bag lying at his feet and followed behind you. You had opted for driving to the station since his train had come too late for the buses to still be running, and you didn’t want to have to deal with paying for or lugging his baggage into a cab.

After loading the luggage into your trunk, you both settled into the front seats of your well-worn car. You heard Hoseok chuckle while clicking in his seatbelt, “This certainly feels different from the drunk bus and taxi rides back to the campus dorms. Even if it’s about the same level as luxury.”

You rolled your eyes, “Hey, my car is reliable. The previous owner only had it for a couple of years before selling it off and she’s been perfectly good since then. Though, my mom would probably agree with you on the luxury bit.”

“Yeah, well, who wants to listen to her opinion anyway. Before I forget, thanks again for letting me stay at your place while I’m here, I know it’ll probably be annoying with the wedding prep going on.”

“It’s no problem, seriously. Besides, a lot of my stuff’s been moved over to Yoongi’s for when I move after the wedding. I’m just keeping my apartment there in case I need it since I won’t be paying rent at Yoongi’s.” Keeping the lease on your apartment had been a conscious decision because you had figured you’d want a safe space away from the marriage drama and it wouldn’t be an extra hit to your income. What your mother and Yoongi didn’t know wouldn’t hurt them.

“Has he really paid off his entire apartment? You’re marrying a proper chaebol,” Hoseok joked.

You laughed lightly, a tinge of awkwardness at the idea that you really were, and you had no idea how he’d act in his own house. Tapping your fingers along the steering wheel, you tried to subtly change the topic, “Well, speaking of apartments, do you know where you’re going to be looking?”

Hoseok launched into a detailed plan he had for looking at rental properties in Seoul for both his apartment and the studio he wanted to open. You excitedly listened along, thrilled that he was planning on settling near you, as you drove to your own apartment.

After you’d parked, Hoseok insisted on taking the large suitcase, claiming that only he was strong enough to lug it up the stairs. You only laughed a little bit at his sour expression when you showed him the perfectly working elevator.

Punching in the code to your apartment, you swung open the door, making sure not to step food inside. A loud pop rang out and confetti sprayed out from the doorway.

“Surprise!”

Hoseok stumbled back, clutching at his chest and mouth agape at Joohee’s excited smile from inside the apartment, “Shit, Joohee, you scared me!”

You laughed loudly before grabbing his suitcase and rolling it inside, setting the duffel bag on top. Joohee began cleaning up the mess of confetti, Hoseok started to unpack what he’d need for the night, and you began unboxing the pizza that had arrived while Joohee was setting up.

As the three of you settled into your living room, Hoseok already teasing Joohee, you felt like a void in your heart had been filled. The last few months had been so stressful and it hadn’t felt like you’d gotten a break emotionally in so long. The sounds of your friends chattering and laughing made you feel at ease. So, naturally, Hoseok had to ruin that.

“So, Y/N, how are you feeling about the rehearsal next week? Or the wedding, for that matter.”

You shifted in your position on the loveseat, feeling yourself frown, “Um, I don’t know. I don’t know what to expect. I can’t believe I’ll be married in just over a week.” Letting out a nervous laugh, you continued, “I haven’t talked to Yoongi in like six months. I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

You could feel yourself spiraling, but you had been holding in so many emotions that it felt like you couldn’t stop yourself from talking, “Honestly, I’m really scared. I don’t want this to be my life forever. I’m not ready, I don’t think I’ll ever be.”

Joohee got up from her spot on the couch to hug you, Hoseok joining soon after. Something about their touch comforting you pushed you over the edge, the dam broke, and tears began streaming down your cheeks. You sniffled pathetically, hating the level of vulnerability you were currently displaying. You hadn’t cried throughout this whole experience, but in the comforting presence of your closest friends, you couldn’t help it.

“I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to marry him if it’s going to be like this. Why does my life have to be this way? Why can’t I be normal?”

Joohee and Hoseok only squeezed you in response, not having an answer to your questions. Your tears continued on until you couldn’t cry anymore and Joohee finally released you. She stood and smiled kindly at you, “Do you want me to get you anything?”

“Water, please,” you said raspily, throat dry from all the crying. Joohee nodded before heading to the kitchen, leaving you with Hoseok who had shoved himself into the loveseat to further comfort you.

“Thanks,” you mumbled, slightly muffled by burying your face in Hoseok’s soft, cotton shirt.

“You know you can always talk to us. I wish I could change this for you, that you didn’t have to do this,” he said softly, stroking your hair.

“It is what it is,” you said, feeling much more mellow now that you’d cried out all your overwhelming emotions.

“Still,” Hoseok insisted, “He has no reason to be such a jerk.” You shrugged, you felt the same but there wasn’t much you could do to change that.

Joohee returned with a cup of water which you gratefully took and sipped. Suddenly feeling quite exhausted, and a headache coming on, you tapped Hoseok to get off of you, to which he complied and clambered off the loveseat.

“Sorry guys, I’m just so exhausted now. I really appreciate you being here, but I think I’m going to head to bed,” you stated, hugging both of them, before starting to gather the trash to clean up.

Joohee laid a hand on your shoulder to stop you, “Go, get some rest. We’ll clean up.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes,” Hoseok exclaimed, and pushed you towards your bedroom, “Go to bed!”

Laughing, you acquiesced and headed into your bedroom to get ready to sleep. As you went through your nightly routine, you felt yourself feeling a bit calmer about the upcoming week. You had your two closest friends by your side.

You were ready to handle anything that Yoongi threw at you.

Probably.

Yoongi lightly swirled the glass of whiskey between his fingers as he sat at his desk in his brown leather chair. By this time next week, he would be getting married.

His eyes drifted towards the manila folder lying at the edge of his desk, a small water stain on the corner. Inside were the files on his soon-to-be wife, Seo Y/N. He took a sip of his whiskey, the smoky flavour traveling down his throat, as he considered his fiancee.

He didn’t know what to make of her. She just seemed so meek and obedient, which wasn’t at all appealing. He didn’t remember much of her from before the arrangement, aside from vague interactions between them and the Kim siblings. She had seemed quite timid then too.

Sighing, he leaned back in his chair, setting his glass on his desk. He didn’t want to do this marriage. It was a chore, really.

Yoongi didn’t necessarily have anyone he was looking to marry, but having to pretend to be exclusive with some girl he didn’t care about wasn’t conducive to the bachelor lifestyle he’d cultivated. He’d set his ground rules, and she’d agreed, pretty easily, another thing that irked Yoongi.

Couldn’t she stand up for herself? Or say anything at all that was her own opinion?

Yoongi drummed his fingers on the arm of his chair, he supposed she had said something that night. She’d wanted to be friends. He hadn’t been expecting that.

He figured it might be some condition about how she didn’t want to work or for him to stop seeing other people, but, instead, she’d simply asked for his friendship. And he’d refused.

Of course he did, it went against his other rule. He wanted to keep his life separate from this artificial marriage and that included remaining nothing but acquaintances. He’d have to be steadfast, he decided. That night, when he’d seen your imploring expression with hope shining in your eyes, he’d almost agreed. He wasn’t sure why that was, or if he even wanted to know, but he couldn’t let it happen again.

Despite your docile and unassuming nature, you were dangerous. And you didn’t seem to know it, which made you all the more so.

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dunmeshistash · 1 month

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What do you think about Shuro? And more specifically his relationship with Laios, and idk if you talk about ships but what are your thoughts on laishuro

I have this headcannon that Laios has some sort of unrequited crush on Shuro just because it's sorta funny

I ship pretty much everything. Like, as default I think everyone should kiss everyone 👍

If I'm honest I'm not much of a Shuro fan, he's a little boring to me and reactions to the chimera episode made me dislike him a bit lmao.

Ignoring the fandom I like him as a character and I LOVE his fight with Laios. Shuro's relationship to Laios is my favorite part of that character so laishuro pretty much saves him for me.

In universe Shuro is said to be quite the introvert even for people from his country. He's not the standard for someone from the eastern archipelago and it bothered me a bit when people used that to justify how he wasn't honest to Laios. I understand the idea that he comes from somewhere where reading social cues is not only expected but required but he's also someone who avoids confrontation and is quiet/shy in general.

Here's a bit from Maizuru's description from the adventurer's bible

"People tend to describe Shuro as "drab" and "shy" (...)" so specifically HE IS the exact type of person who would cause the biggest misunderstanding with Laios, just compare him to how his retainers or even his father and brothers act.

It took them saying they used ancient magic on Falin/seeing chimera Falin for him to finally snap, everything else he decided to just take it cause he thought it was better to take it than to confront Laios directly.

So besides the cultural differences you have to take into consideration this was pretty much the perfect storm brewing for that confrontation, and it's as much who Shuro is as a person and who Laios is as person that caused it.

I also disagree that the fight was a "they're both in the wrong" situation. Don't get me wrong, Laios was VERY culturally insensitive to Shuro and even more insensitive to his feelings, but there was nothing he could have done differently with the information that was available to him.

Specifically I see this comic being used to justify how Laios was to blame too, making Shuro into the victim

Like that's a major white guy move but he DIDN'T HEAR Shuro's name and Shuro never corrected him. I'd understand it if his reaction was "Your name is too complicated so I'll call you Shuro instead" that would be a major dick move, but Laios did not hear his name because Toshiro mumbled it, and for someone that forgot Kabru's name several times I imagine he made an effort to remember Shuro's.

Laios never met someone from the eastern archipelago before this, nobody ever explained to him he wasn't acting in an appropriate manner and most of all he thought they were friends. He trusted Shuro to set boundaries for him, he always respects boundaries that are set even when he doesn't fully understand them (Recalling the "I forgot about feelings.." when Chilchuck says it feels wrong to eat merman)

Instead of explaining ANYTHING to Laios, Shuro instead held it all in until it exploded all at once, he blamed Laios for not knowing something he couldn't know, and accused him of not being serious about saving his own sister.

Just imagine how this must have felt for Laios, everyone is always underestimating how serious he is, everyone accuses him of being stupid, clueless, and now this guy is telling him he isn't serious about saving the person he loves the most in the world and wants to protect always. To me this wasn't a "they're both in the wrong" situation, Shuro is far more in the wrong than Laios. But that's just how I see it.

That all being said, they understood each other finally and made peace after that fight.

And several times after this we see that Shuro really cares for Laios, and Laios still wants to be his friend. He even offered to save Laios if he fails (and he's sure he's gonna fail). So their relationship is dear to me, especially cause after this they finally have the foundation for a true mutual friendship <3

I think my dislike of Shuro comes from relating to him to be honest, it happens often that I see my own failures on a character and get angry at them for being angry at myself lmao. I also got a little annoyed cause I only saw people defending him, apparently those were made as a response to hate he had gotten? But since I never actually seen the hate it just felt annoying to see Shuro being white knighted.

Anyway I love the two of them together and I'm really happy they finally understood each other better. laishuro might be my favorite Laios ship, one sided crushes are great.

#Sorry I dont like being negative and I hope this wasnt too mean towards Shuro #its hard to be objective about him cause of personal feelings but I tried #Dungeon Meshi #Shuro #Laios Touden #Ask #Longpost #Rant #long post #Oh yeah I've said it before but I live under a rock I rarely know whats happening in fandom #might be part of the reason why only the shuro defenses found their way to me #dunmeshi thoughts

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hotheadedhero · 2 months

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In Unrequited Love - Part 2

AN: When I say that writing this part had me feral, I don't mean it lightly. This part ended up being over 2000 words, blimmin heck. It had me losing sleep, losing sanity, and my grasp on reality and going insane. All in good ways of course! It got angstier than I originally intended but, man, I'm a sucker for it. I think you guys are too ;)

Part 1 - Part 3

Warning: angst for reader's lacking self-preservation, silly dummy, but Donnie is also a dumb-dumb, so you're as bad as each other really.

Donatello x Reader

Every explanation you can come up with to try and disregard your feelings for the tallest of the turtle brothers has only been met with more anguish. First, you theorised it to be some kind of miscommunication with your emotions, that you had merely misread a deep level of friendship as a new crush. Then, you tried to reason with yourself that it was a rebound - a re-focussing of such feelings onto someone else who likes spending time with you. Neither holds enough weight to get out of this funk, however. You’re chain-bound.

Then begged the question: what are you to do about it? Realistically, what can you do about it? Not once have you had the courage to even try and say something to Casey, so what makes you think this is any different? If anything, it’s worse. Not only because Donatello is so helplessly in love with April, but because you are so much more hopelessly in love with him. Even the way you used to feel about Jones wasn’t this overwhelming.

You hate it. You hate it so damn much and, yet, you can’t stop yourself from spending most of your free time in that forsaken laboratory. There’s a saying that keeps coming to mind whenever you find yourself aiding him with inventions and experiments: fool me once, shame on you - fool me twice, shame on me. You certainly feel the fool and more so after a particular incident. A word used candidly but it felt like an incident at the time. The details are foggy but you believe it had something to do with the daughter of The Foot - Karai - and a new robotic toy of hers. Donnie had come in and saved the day, earning a kiss on the cheek from his crush by the end of it. To say that it stung is an understatement.

Nothing appeared to change after that day other than the joy your new infatuation must have been riding on since. You hadn’t even taken note of how it’s affected you. You don’t take notice of it at all. Yes, you still regularly visit the lab but less so to help out. As of late, it is you who is being helped. A habit which has become the norm where the purple-clad turtle finds himself patching you up. Almost every time you see him, there’s a new bump, bruise, or scratch that needs tending to and every time he does what he can to make it better.

Today is no different. If anything, it has to be the worst of your afflictions that he’s seen to date. The first few times were viewed in mild hilarity but he’s not finding these frequenting successions of being your first aider funny anymore. He currently has you sat in his desk chair, knelt down and worriedly looking over your ankle. The pigment of your skin is only slightly discoloured but it’s clear from the way you hobbled in a few moments ago that it can’t handle much weight right now. Carefully, he holds a cold compress against the affected area, earning a jolted hiss from your person. He winces himself and mutters a quiet apology. Some silence follows until he decides he needs to know exactly what you did to warrant such a bad injury.

“What happened this time?” he asks as he continues to inspect the contusion, making sure nothing is broken beneath.

“I just slipped whilst I was coming down the ladder,” you admit casually. “Think there’s been some rain recently, so it’s my own fault for not wearing grippier shoes.”

Your answer is marginally concerning for two reasons: it hasn’t rained for at least a few days now and he’s seen the way you work - how careful you are when you’re helping him with mechanics or measuring various chemicals. This isn’t like you. Retrospectively, he hasn’t known you long but he likes to think you’ve hung out enough for him to discern that you aren’t typically this clumsy. He’s even detected a drop in your mood. You don’t crack out as many jokes with him, nor have you spoken much about Casey. The band of his mask creases over his furrowing brows and he slowly looks up at you.

“Is everything okay?” he inquires carefully, mindful of the potentially sensitive question. “You seem… out of sorts lately. If it’s something to do with Casey-”

“It’s not Casey,” you interrupt, rather abruptly he notices. Sighing, you quickly attempt to correct yourself and slump into the seat. “I dunno. It might be. I think I’m just done with all the love stuff at this point.”

You end on a bitter cadence, one that has Donatello sinking. His heart breaks knowing that yours has been taken away and trampled on by this mess. It well and truly hurts him to see you this way, to hear that you’re energy has been depleted because of this. Then, like a jab to the gut, it all comes to fruition. The ugly canvas decorated with the hard, cold facts paints this horrifying image before his mind: your physical pain is a manifestation of that from within. Whether it’s intentional or not, it’s still an alarming prospect. Swallowing past the nausea permeating and rising into his throat, he takes a moment to reflect on how best to help you. He doesn’t want to be the one to tell you that you should keep pursuing that ragged hockey puck-lover but he also doesn’t want to see you in such disarray. He can’t bear the thought that you might get hurt worse than this.

With a steadying breath, he takes your hands in his own and smiles up at you sympathetically. “Don’t say that. You never know. There’s still time for things to change in your favour.”

If only he knew how much that gaze of his torments you; how his hands make yours burn cold. You silently beg of him to not look at you with such warmhearted affection, that the very thing he believes to have ruptured your heart is not Casey but is him. Part of you wishes that you could get angry and blame this on him for being so sweet, funny, and an overall joy to be around but that wouldn’t be fair. The reality is that you can’t blame anyone, not even yourself. Feelings can’t be forced nor can they be changed. Your eyes drop to the two sets of hands that rest on your lap, knowing you can’t stand to stare into those puppy-dog maroons much longer.

Unenthused, you hum, “Guess so. Seems like you’re a little more on the hopeful side after that kiss on the cheek, huh?”

He glances away with an awkward smile. Everyone may assume that his head must have exploded when that happened and it would have done were it not for a certain change of circumstance. April kissing his cheek was ironically what led to him realising he loves you. At first, he was entirely confused. Why didn’t he get that round of butterflies? The heart palpitations? There wasn’t even a wild glee that he would have expected with something that monumental happening. Maybe there wasn’t supposed to be. He would have to look into it, he thought, and test it to figure out what was going on. An experiment that didn’t even make it to the drawing board.

No more than an hour later, Donnie’s tending to a burn on your arm after you spilt boiling coffee on yourself; the first domino to fall in this onset of injuries he would serve medical attention to. Seeing you hurt struck something fierce within him. He had this sudden urgency to protect you, care for you, and look after you. Then, followed a quick daydream of holding you in his arms, close to his body and safe from any and all extraneous variables that could threaten you. It flashed before his eyes with such volatile ammunition he almost stumbled over the dressing work he had been so carefully wrapping around your forearm. That’s when he realised and, boy, he couldn’t look you straight in the eye for the remainder of that day.

Perhaps, in a way then, your words ring true. He likes to believe he’s more hopeful. He likes to think he stands a better chance with you with how often you hang out and how well you get along. That’s why he doesn’t want you to give up on love. Regardless of where your sights are set, if you’re done with love, that’s his chance gone completely. He wants to keep that hope alive in you as well. Even if it’s for someone else, he doesn’t want you to be devoid of that sensation. It can hurt but it’s still a beautiful experience in his eyes.

Realising your smaller fingers are still overlapped in his, he blushes - a blush you assume to be the result of your conversation. He finally withdraws his grasp lest he risks you experiencing the backlash of his suddenly clammy palms. It’s about time that he secures your ankle in a bandage, anyway.

Ignoring your question altogether, he laughs nervously and clears his throat. “Well, the good news is that nothing is broken. Most of the fall was taken by your ligaments, though, so you won’t be able to walk properly for a few days. My recommendation is you rest at home in the meantime.”

You toss your head back into the chair and groan out lethargically, “If only I could replace it with a robotic one, hm?” Along with your overly attached, love-sick heart. “Would make things easier.”

“As long as you know to come here for repairs. Robotic limbs need just as much care and attention as organic ones.”

Glancing away, your lips turn up at the sides bashfully. There’s a smile. A genuine smile. He’s been waiting all day - a few days - to see one of those. What a dork. You can only hope your ankle does a fast job of getting better. At least that means no school for a few days but it’s still a bother. Simultaneously, that means no visits to the lair until you’re healed up. The thought is upsetting but you can’t help thinking it might do you some good; a bit of distance to calm the erratic, painful ache of the suffering muscle that sits behind your ribcage. Distance and distraction. On the topic of distractions, a particular object of interest has caught your eye from across the room: a small, rectangular mound hidden beneath a thin layer of cloth.

“Hey, what’ve you got under this?”

You don’t even wait for an answer, opting to propel yourself over to his desk with your good foot. The office chair glides along the floor and, before he can stop you, you’re already pulling the tarp from this mystery item. For someone who’s just injured their ankle, you’re annoyingly quick to feed curiosity’s temptation. Your snoopiness would reveal a narrow box, that which you open too, further revealing a slim sliver of chain with a charm sitting comfortably in the centre of it. Said charm is a purple turtle and you don’t have to think hard to figure out that this is a gift for a certain red-head. It’s magnificently crafted if not a little corny but you can commend his boldness.

“I’m sure April will like it,” you say sweetly enough that it masks the disdain bubbling in your throat. With a quiet sigh, you return the necklace to its resting place, fingertips brushing over the top of the box. “If she doesn’t, though, I… think it’s beautiful.”

Truthfully, that’s the only appraisal he’s looking for, especially seeing as he’s made it for you. He should take the opportunity whilst he’s riding on that high. You like it. He should just say that it’s for you. Get it out there and proclaim his feelings if not at least allude to them but the melancholy behind your eyes chokes him out of trying. It’s not the right time. Your heart is fragile - far too fragile to be here any longer, you’ve decided.

“Thanks again for helping out,” you mumble, swallowing past a lump whilst you attempt to stand. “Better make a start on resting, huh?”

Quickly, he holds an arm out in case you need to grab onto it, face scrunched and brows raised from the middle. “H-Hey, wait! Can I at least walk you back home? That manhole cover is gonna be a struggle let alone the ladder to get to it.”

Cursing the kindness of this tall terrapin would be cruel but he just makes it so darn difficult to not fall more victim to your feelings. You would love nothing more than to take his offer. Wholehandedly, you would within a quarter of a second. There’s just one teeny tiny problem, however.

“I appreciate the offer, Donnie, but it’s still daytime,” you remind him.

In his overzealousness, he had missed that fact. A seemingly obvious detail that he wouldn’t typically forget were he not so worried about you. He is not letting you go back to the surface alone in your current condition - both the physical and mental. Wishing to be human isn’t a naturally occurring thought but it’s currently a prevalent desire. How is he meant to ensure a safe trip home if he can’t go topside? Just as begins formulating a plan, a certain dark-apparelled miscreant passes the lab. Donnie can’t believe he’s actually going to do this but it seems like the only option.

“Casey.” He raises a hand dilatorily to catch the teenager’s attention. “Any chance you could escort (Y/n) home?”

Casey takes one look at your wrapped ankle and throws out two finger guns with a wink. “Jones is on the case.”

He understood the assignment quickly enough at least. Hooray for him. Donatello is prompt to smile when you cast him an estranged glance. You reckon he’s trying to wingman you, which is almost hilarious. If only he knew. Your “escort” temporarily donates you his hockey stick as a makeshift crutch and places a hand between your shoulder blades as extra leverage whilst walking you out. Donnie may have been lying to himself before. He doesn’t want you to be devoid of love but he doesn’t want your love to be directed elsewhere like he had initially tried to come to terms with. It should be him. He wants it so badly to be him. Pitifully, he watches you leave, hearing Casey remark something along the lines of “you’re in safe hands” before the two of you are out of earshot. Such friendly, flirtatious comments from your prior crush would have had you in a tizzy but, weirdly, you find comfort in them. It’s a short moment of silence for your incessant pining.

Now, all there is to do is hope that your forced rest isn’t met with bedridden wallowing for the oncoming days.

I know the first kiss on the cheek moment doesn't really fit with how it goes in the show but that's the point of fanfiction, is it not? :P Hope you enjoyed! I'm gonna lie down now, holy jeebus

#tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt 2012 #donatello #donnie #2012 donnie #tmnt x reader #x reader #donatello x reader #angst #part 2 #casey jones #april o'neil

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jadeylovesmarvelxo · 1 year

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Hey There Jealousy.

You're part of Hellfire with a big crush on Eddie, he doesn't feel the same and you deal with unrequited feelings until a date with someone else triggers unexpected reactions. ✨

Warnings; Angst, jealousy, fighting, fluffy goodness. Not S4 compliant.

Please like or reblog, etc if you enjoyed this ❤️🌸

I don't give anyone permission to copy my work.

❤️❤️

You had been in Hellfire for the last two years, it was your senior year and things were going pretty great.

When you first joined the group you didn't know what to expect, Gareth was the one who had found out that you were a huge dnd fan and always played with the kids you were babysitting at the time.

One of them happened to be his younger cousin Dave who raved about you to Gareth, it was then decided you would tag along to Hellfire.

None of your friends could understand why you wanted to join but you ignored their doom-filled predictions of it being a cult or whatever bullshit they heard from Jason.

Eddie was hesitant at first until you played your first campaign and knocked everyone's expectations out of the water.

Now you were one of Eddie's valued teammates and the tiny itty bitty crush you had on Eddie when you first met? Now it was full-blown feelings and you were screwed.

Because he didn't think of you like that, he had crushes on Chrissy Cunningham, other cheerleaders, hookups with girls in bands and at The Hideout where he would play with his band Corroded Coffin.

It hurt, seeing him with those girls hurt, it was expected though. You were just his friend, he was older and in a cool band and despite what Jason and his Neanderthal friends thought and called him- "the freak" garnered a lot of intrigue.

He was also gorgeous, with beautiful brown doe eyes, shaggy brown hair, tattoos and dimples. Eddie was fucking hot.

So yeah, you were screwed.

❤️❤️

Dustin never thought he would be speaking one and one with Chrissy Cunningham. He knew you were friends with her and Eddie a little bit too but it still felt surreal.

You and Eddie. That was the reason the two of them were conspiring together in the first place.

"Look, I like Eddie, he's a sweet guy but the fact that he doesn't notice how gone my girl is for him is frustrating" Dustin nods.

"What do you want to do about it? If he's not interested then you can't force him to be Chrissy" she nods.

"I know. Eddie Munson despite what yn seems to think isn't the only guy in the whole universe, others have noticed how cute she is"

This intrigues Dustin. Was it Steve? He knew Steve thought you were hot.

"You know Matt? He's on the basketball team? One of Jason's friends. He's one of them" Dustins eyes widen.

"So what do you suggest we do?" Chrissy smiles.

"We don't have to do anything. Matt is going to ask her out. Either Eddie feels something or he doesn't, either way..."

Either way, you would either get your dream guy or a chance to move on for good. Dustin liked you a lot and wanted you to find happiness, whether it was with Eddie, Matt or whoever you wanted to be with.

He was nervous but ready to see what happened.

❤️❤️

"Hey" You're shocked into silence as Matt comes over, he's like one of the most popular guys in school besides Jason and yeah you're meant to be tutoring him tonight but you didn't expect him to want to hang out beyond that.

Did he want to hang out with Hellfire? Immediately you notice Eddie tense, defences up and you don't blame him, the basketball team has a few jerks in it.

Besides Lucas of course. You adored Lucas as well as Mike and Dustin.

Matt has never been hostile though so you smile encouragingly while Eddie glares at the newcomer.

"Hey, I know we were meant to be studying tonight but I saw on your bag that you like horror movies, there's a showing of some classic horror movies tonight. You wanna go?"

Okay, this you weren't expecting. He rests his hand on your arm and his thumb strokes over your shoulder, it tingles and you feel flustered and also acutely aware of Eddie's raised eyebrow as he watches you both.

Chrissy is watching too giving you a thumbs-up gesture and you make a decision.

"I'd love to" you find yourself saying and Matt grins.

"Cool, I'll see you after class" You watch him go feeling like you're in some strange dream.

"Did that really just happen?" you ask the others who look between you and then Eddie.

"You've been swayed to the dark side. Yeah, it did" Eddie huffs and you roll your eyes.

"I have not. He is cute though" You sigh dreamily, it's nice having someone notice you.

"He was all over you in Ms O'Donnell's class. Someone's got a crush" Jeff teases and the others join in on the light hearted teasing.

Except for Eddie, who's quiet and munching on a bag of pretzels while he glares in the direction of the Jock table.

"We were just talking, he was asking me for help studying. I help Eddie so why not?" Gareth grins.

"Mmm and now you're off to the movies, a horror movie. That you'll not be watching because of all the... He makes a kissy face and you giggle.

"Dingus" would that happen though? Your belly flutters.

"Shut up! " Eddie snaps and the others quieten and your heart rate spikes because he looks so annoyed and you wonder if it's about you and Matt.

"We were discussing the campaign" he points out and your heart sinks, right Hellfire. It was silly of you to think he might be jealous. Why would he be?

After school, you meet up with Matt to head to the cinema.

Maybe this will be a good thing and you will be able to finally move on from Eddie?

❤️❤️

Eddie was invited to tag along with Robin and Steve to see The Blob.

How was he supposed to know that you would be at this movie with Matt? He felt like an idiot for staying and semi-spying on your date.

He tried to leave but the harsh twist of his heart when you laughed at Matt's jokes kept him rooted to the spot as well as Steve and Robin who wanted to see the movie.

Eddie didn't know why the sight of you and Matt together made his stomach bottom out but he was beginning to get a good idea.

He couldn't concentrate on the movie. It felt like that time that you were crushing on Steve for weeks and that kick started Eddie's dislike of the dude.

Until he got to know him and realized he was a pretty cool guy, Dustin's hero-worshipping of Steve too had stuck in his brain.

"Dude you didn't tell me that yn was looking to date someone. Could have asked her myself" Steve nudges him and nods to you and Matt.

Wait so Steve liked you as well? The urge to dislike Steve comes racing back. He kinda wants to hit something.

"You like her?" he asks Steve who shrugs.

"Dude, she's hot. You've never noticed?" he thinks about this and he's always known that you're beautiful, he's never liked anyone noticing you but assumed it was just him being protective.

Eddie doesn't think the pain in his chest could get any worse until Matt kisses you and he finally understands what it feels like to get his heart ripped out.

Stumbling out of the cinema he's joined by Robin and Steve, he feels like he can't breathe and the image of Matt kissing you won't go away.

"What's wrong with him?" Robin panics and Steve pats his back.

"Think he just realised he's in love Robin"

Love? he was in love with you? At first, he's like when the fuck did that happen.

Then be thought about it and maybe it was every time you smiled or you laughed or when you would fall asleep on his bed after helping him study and look so beautiful he was mesmerized.

Maybe it was your kindness, the way you played a kickass game of Hellfire or the way you looked at him on nights when it was just the two of you in his bedroom while he strummed on the guitar and taught you how to play.

Jesus Christ, he was an idiot.

❤️❤️

Eddie had been weird for the whole week and that was all you could think about tonight.

Your date with Matt had turned into a second and now this third date.

It was nice you kept telling yourself along with the fact that Matt was a lovely guy.

That's why you were at this party instead of at Hellfire, though you'd rather be with the boys and Erica in the middle of a campaign.

Despite Chrissy being here which made you feel more relaxed you knew this wasn't your thing at all.

It didn't help that after half an hour Matt was already drunk and he kept trying to feel you up even you told him no.

Your good opinion of him was rapidly fading with him acting more and more like a douche bag.

You had said no three times now and you were pissed.

"Come on babe" you shake your head and when he almost knocks you over and you hit your side on the table creating a rip in your dress you decide you've had enough of the party.

And of Matt.

"I said no! God, we are so done" You snap and tug out of his arms, you ignore him and stalk away, you're so upset that you don't realise how far you've walked into the woods until you can't hear anything from the party.

Shit.

❤️❤️

You hadn't shown up for Hellfire and that was Eddie's first distraction of the night, many more were to come but this was the first and all he could think about was you with Matt.

Jealousy coils around his gut and once again he curses his stupidity for not realizing his feelings sooner. It made him pissed off, it was hard to concentrate and he wasn't happy.

Eddie startles out of his DM mode as Lucas comes running into the drama room, he's just about to unload on him for missing half an hour of Hellfire but the look on his face stops him.

"Sinclair what's wrong?'' that's when Lucas tells him you were at a party with Matt, he's drunk and you're missing.

Then Chrissy comes in and rushes over to Dustin, it's like he's in some episode of the Twilight Zone.

"Dustin! Big mistake with Matt, he's an asshole he kept trying to grope yn at the party and she left and I can't find her" Chrissy was panicking and Dustin looks to Eddie freaked out.

Trying to tamper down the thoughts of beating the shit out of Matt he assures Chrissy, Dustin and Lucas that he will find you.

"Jordan said that she ran into the woods, Eddie" Lucas tells him and Eddie high-tails it to his van.

He had to find you. It was starting to rain and you could get sick or anything. What if you got lost? What if you tripped and injured yourself or you... He freezes.

What if the monster that stalked Hawkins Woods got to you? Normally he would have said that it was a load of rumours and shit but everyone knew Hawkins was one strange little town.

All the deaths. He couldn't risk you being hurt and he drove even faster. Desperate to get to you.

❤️❤️

You're shivering and chilled to the bone but you manage to find a clearing in the woods that leads back to the party.

It feels like you've been lost for hours but it probably hasn't been that long and you're relieved when you see a bunch of parties goers

That's when you also see Eddie, flashlight in hand and he shouts your name in relief.

He runs to you and you stumble into his arms sobbing in relief. The feeling of familiarity of Eddie's arms around you immediately makes you feel safe.

"It's okay princess. I've got you, you're safe" he checks you over and you assure him you're fine.

"You're soaked and look at all the rips on your clothes," he says worriedly and shrugs off his jacket placing it around you. The rain is fiercer now, a storm is brewing and you look anxiously at him.

He will catch a cold just standing in his Hellfire shirt and jeans, you try to tell him that but he stubbornely refuses to take his jacket back.

"Chrissy and Lucas explained everything. If I see that douchebag Matt he better run the other way" Eddie seethes, you've never seen him this angry before. It's not like him.

Well, that's a lie you tell yourself as you know how protective he is of you. How many scrapes he's gotten himself in for you, even if he had no chance in winning, he would defend you.

Even when he knew you could take care of yourself he still protected you.

At that point, possibly in the worst timing ever Matt stumbles over to you.

Eddie stiffens and Matt glares at you.

"You finally decided to have a go after all huh? Instead of acting like a frigid bit... He didn't get a chance to finish that sentence as Eddie socked him in the mouth.

He wines flexing his hand which is now bruised and sore.

"Fucking worth it" he announces, puts his arm around you and leads you to the van.

❤️❤️

You had never been so glad to see Eddie's Uncle Wayne in your life. He takes in the rips on your outfit and the bruise on your arm and scowls.

"What boy is my nephew beating up this time honey?" you would smile if you weren't so cold.

Eddie comes in and you immediately take his hands in yours and inspect his bruised knuckles.

"Are you okay?" you ask him and he nods still looking pissed off. He softens as you clean and bandage up the knuckles.

"Never mind me, sweetheart. Are you okay?" he asks you and you nod still a bit shivery. Uncle Wayne gets you a blanket and you cuddle into it.

"I'm better now. Should have never gone to that party. The whole time I was there I just wanted to be at Hellfire but I thought Matt was a nice guy and wanted to stick around for a bit, then he got drunk and acted like a dick"

Tears fall down your cheeks, frustration and just total exhaustion from the night's events.

Eddie deftly leads you to his room and shuts the door. Once you are inside he holds you close to him.

"I thought I had found a great guy and that he liked me when all he wanted to do was get in my pants. He didn't want to get to know me, not really" Eddie rubs your arm soothingly

"Maybe the next guy will be better huh?" you say hopefully and Eddie goes still which confused you.

"Eddie?" he swallows as he stares at you and you clasp his hand in yours.

"I don't want there to be another guy sweetheart. I want there to be just one guy. I want to be that guy"

What? He continues speaking and you can't believe what's happening.

"I know it took forever for me to realise and I've been so fucking jealous all week of Matt because he doesn't get how special and kind and beautiful you are and how lucky he was to be with you and the dude messed it up? What a douchebag"

"Eddie," you say again and he looks at you with those pretty brown eyes all wide and nervous.

"You don't feel the same right? Shit, forget I said anything and.." you call his name again and this time he quietens.

"Kiss me" He doesn't need to be told twice his lips are on yours and he grins as you kiss him back, he pulls away briefly.

"I'm sorry I didn't realise sooner princess" You rest your head on his chest as he pulls you into a hug, arms wrapped tightly around you as you sit on his knee.

"Hey less apologizing and more kisses" He laughs and kisses you again, his thumb stroking your cheek as he presses tender kisses to your lips.

"I'm an idiot. Should have been kissing you like this for weeks, feels so good sweetheart, it's never felt like this, just so right"

You smile on cloud nine knowing what he means, kissing Matt while nice and all never felt like this. However all thoughts are wiped from your mind when you straddle Eddie and his breathy moans cause the ache in your core to deepen.

"I love you and I'm gonna be kissing you forever sweetheart, hope you know that," he tells you and the thought of forever with the man you love sounds heavenly.

"I love you Eds, and that sounds perfect to me"

❤️

#eddie munson fluff #eddie munson angst #eddie munson x you

894 notes · View notes

clairenovakz · 6 months

Text

unrequited (dean winchester x reader)

pairing: dean x reader warnings: pure angst, parental death, canon-typical violence, but fluff at the end summary: after dean rejects your feelings for him, you start to lose part of yourself. when he realizes how far you’re gone, he’ll do anything to get you back. word count: 5.6k a/n: this is set in season 5, although it largely ignores the canon timeline because i can’t be bothered to make it all match up. this is my first real time writing dean so i hope you enjoy it!! as always, i love feedback. and also as always, my requests are open!!

“Y/N.”

You could barely hear Sam over the sound of the bar, gaze fixed on the bartender. People walked past your booth, talking loudly over the soft sound of some random country music, but somehow none of it could pry your attention away. Dean was leaning over the bar, apparently telling a very interesting story to the bartender, who was closer to him than you would have liked. His flannel sleeves were pulled up, exposing his forearms, giving you a rather enticing view.

“Y/N, are you listening?”

You snapped your head towards your friend. Sam was sitting across from you, clinking his beer bottle against yours. He looked tired; the apocalypse was looming over the three of you, and your new angel friend had been running you all ragged trying to press you all to stop it. Sometimes it didn’t feel right to have normalcy.

But even as the devil hunted Sam and the world was in danger of falling to pieces, you and the Winchesters would always find yourselves back in a bar, staying in shitty motel after shitty motel because it was just what you did. You don’t think you would have wanted it any other way.

“Sorry, what were you saying?” You respond sheepishly, trying to give Sam your full attention.

“Y’know, you’re gonna have to face this eventually.” Sam quirked an eyebrow at you.

The two of you had a stare-off before you slammed your head into the table, groaning. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Sammy.”

“It’s Sam. And sure I do.” He flicked the top of your head. “You have a massive crush on my brother, right?”

You flung your head back up and smacked his arm. “Speak louder, would you?!”

Sam laughed at you. “You know you could do a million times better, right?”

You frowned. Sam didn’t know how wrong he was. You didn’t think you could ever get better than Dean, although you knew Sam was just messing with you. Dean was so hopelessly selfless, it made you mad just thinking about it. Even after all this time, he carried himself with a grace you couldn’t understand. If you’d been at this whole apocalypse thing alone, or without him, you think you might have kicked the can by now.

“Whatever, I think I’m gonna go back.” Your mouth became a straight line as you pushed your beer towards Sam. “You can finish my beer.”

“Hey, you sure?” Sam looked genuinely concerned now. “Don’t let him get to you, seriously.”

“Yeah, I’m sure.” Your smile didn’t quite reach your eyes. “See you later, dude.”

You grabbed your jacket and swung it over your shoulders, deciding to say goodbye to Dean before you stepped out. The bartender was so close to him, her long blonde hair was brushing his shoulder. He looked so young, somehow, smiling at her with a twinkle in his eye. You weren’t sure if you could recall him looking at you like that.

“Hey, Dean.” You brushed a hand ever-so-gently on his back. “I’m heading out. Don’t do anything stupid.”

Dean turned then, his eyes meeting yours easily. “Aw, sweetheart, gonna ditch my brother already?” He smirked.

You groaned internally. “You know, you ditched him first.”

He shrugged. “Whatever. See you later.” He turned away without a second thought, fully jumping into the conversation with the bartender again.

That stung. You stepped away quickly into the night air, hugging your jacket closer to you as you walked to your car. God, how stupid was this? You’d been pining for him since high school, and it seemed to be a well-known fact to everyone except him. There were moments you thought he might feel the same - but then again, he was the same flirty asshole with every person you’d met. It was killing you slowly to watch him distance himself from you, especially now.

You got in your car and sat behind the wheel for a minute, trying to regain your composure. You wouldn’t let a man get to you. In the silence of your thoughts, you failed to notice the sound of flapping wings next to you until it was too late.

“Y/N.”

You screamed, honking the car horn briefly and flinging yourself back. Next to you was Castiel, apparent angel of the Lord, having materialized out of thin air.

“Jesus Christ.”

He cocked his head at you. “No, I’m Castiel.”

“Yeah, I know, it’s- nevermind.” You sucked in a breath. “What do you need, Cas? Sam and Dean are in the bar if you want to talk to them.”

Cas regarded you for a moment. “I know. But I wanted to talk to you.”

“Um… why?”

“You seem troubled.”

This perplexed you. “Uh, thanks, Cas. But I’m good, okay? No offense, but I don’t really want to talk about my problems with you.”

Cas squinted at you. “I know these times have been dark. There is an air of hopelessness that surrounds you and the Winchesters.” He paused, thinking.

You grimaced. “Jeez, okay, I mean, we’re trying our best.”

“No, what I mean to say is…” He held your gaze, not unkindly. “I just wanted to tell you, Y/N, that although it seems like Sam and Dean are the center players, you still have a part yet to play. And you shouldn’t lose hope quite yet. Not about anything.”

He seemed to be alluding to something much greater than you could understand. You just nodded, unsure how to respond. He nodded back, then cleared his throat.

“I should go. Think about what I said.” Without another word, Cas disappeared in a flurry of wings, and you were left alone.

“Hm.” You hummed, not sure what to make of the interaction. Cas was a friend, or at least, you felt he could be one. You weren’t sure what he really wanted, or what he meant. But you thought of your pressing feelings for Dean, and what he said about hope.

Maybe it meant something after all.

–

“Fuck, I love pancakes.”

Dean was eating like a pig, diving into a stack of pancakes he had absolutely smothered in syrup. You stared at him with a mixture of awe and disgust. He never failed to amuse you, even though this was an almost everyday occurrence. You stared down at your eggs and bacon, hoping that breakfast would stir some confidence in you.

“You okay, Y/N?” Dean paused to look at you, mouth full of sweet pancake. You stifled a laugh as syrup ran down his chin, and he rolled his eyes at you as he wiped his mouth. “I know our coworker can be annoying, but it’s not every day you ask to get breakfast with just me.”

You thought about your “coworker” Sam who was probably busy researching another case right now, even as you had just finished the last one. Either that, or trying to find something to kill the devil, which was still feeling as fruitless as it had before.

“Yeah, um, I guess I wanted to talk to you about something.” You said quite seriously, heart pounding in your chest.

“Shoot.” Dean had finally finished eating, face clean of crumbs and syrup. You looked into those gorgeous green eyes of his and wondered if this was really worth it.

“I’m just gonna say it straight,” You pressed your lips together. “I have feelings for you, Dean.”

Dean stared at you for a moment, frozen. You could see he was processing. “What?”

“Like, romantic feelings.”

He waggled his eyebrows at you. “You been day drinkin’ or something?”

It was 11AM. “Dean, no, be serious.” You frowned. “Look, I know this might be coming off as sudden, but I just really wanted to tell you. And you can say whatever you want to me about it, but… I guess I just wanted to lay my cards out.”

Dean sighed heavily, his somewhat silly expression dropping. He gazed out the window a moment. “I… know.”

“You… know what?”

“I mean, I knew already. That you had feelings for me.”

This time, it was your turn to freeze. Your tongue turned to sandpaper. “What?”

Dean couldn’t seem to look at you. “I just never felt the same way, so I didn’t want to lead you on. I’m sorry, Y/N.”

Your heart dropped into your stomach. You pushed your plate away from you, and reached into your wallet to drop a 20 on the table. You knew you should say something, but this hurt way more than expected. You didn’t know how to react to this with anything other than embarrassment. This whole time? He knew?

“Y/N, wait-”

“I’m gonna go check on Sam, okay?” Your voice sounded warbled and strange, and you realized that it was because you were holding back tears. “Let’s just pretend this conversation didn’t happen. I’ll see you back at the motel.”

“Y/N-”

You were gone before he could get another word out. Outside, it was just a brisk walk back to the motel, opting to avoid the Impala so you could be alone. So much for hope. You felt like an idiot now, thinking back on all the times you and Dean had moments you thought might be more. This whole time he knew, and he had been desperately trying to get you to stay away from him. Maybe you’d just walk off a cliff.

Okay, you wouldn’t do that. But there was a burning feeling in your chest, and it didn’t alleviate by the time you walked into the motel room. Predictably, Sam was on his laptop, squinting at some article. As soon as he saw you, he shut the screen and turned his attention to you, noticing your shakiness.

“Woah, woah, Y/N, what’s wrong?” Sam stood up to approach you.

You turned away from him quickly, trying to hide the tears that were beginning to rapidly fall down your face. “Nothing! I’m okay!” You quickly entered the bathroom, shutting the door behind you and locking it.

“Y/N, seriously, what’s going on?” Sam was behind the door, and you could tell he was leaning on it to hear you. The worried inflection in his voice didn’t escape you.

“Nothing, seriously, okay?” You grabbed a washcloth and put your face in it, your shoulders shaking. “Just g-give me a minute.” You internally cursed yourself, trying to hold it together.

Sam didn’t respond, but you didn’t feel his presence leave the door. You quietly sniffled, reining in your tears as you choked back on your own spit. Fuck. You ran the washcloth under some hot water, pressing it to your face gently to wipe the nastiness away. After a few minutes, when you faced yourself in the mirror, you looked somewhat close to normal, although you knew in your heart you would never be the same again.

Quietly, you opened the door to see Sam standing by the doorframe, a concerned look on his face. “What’s wrong?” He said, softly.

“Sam.” You said, pushing him away, although he resisted. “Leave it be. I’m sure you’ll figure it out soon enough.”

As soon as you said that, Dean came through the door. Your eyes didn’t leave Sam’s face, but Sam turned, looking at his brother to see a slightly distressed expression. Something seemed to click internally, and he stood in front of you to shield you from his brother.

A silence fell over the three of you. You were sure Dean was going to bring it up again, and force you to talk. You knew that awkward tension between you two wasn’t going to stand.

“Ready to hit the road?” Dean asked. You sucked in a sharp breath.

Guess you were wrong about Dean after all.

–

It was the fall of your sophomore year of high school. Your parents had dumped you with Bobby, again, alongside John Winchester’s kids. The three of you got along well enough, but you weren’t really friends. Dean was a year ahead of you, in his junior year, and Sam was still in middle school. In the mornings, Dean drove the three of you, dropping his younger brother off at the middle school before bringing you both to the local high school. In that short period of time where you were alone, you often didn’t talk, opting to listen to whatever heavy metal band he had put on.

You’d been in and out of different schools your whole life. Your parents had been hunters their whole lives, so it was no question they had a connection to John, who had been relentlessly searching for the demon that killed Mary. You didn’t speak to John often, but the times you did, you found there was very little care in his eyes.

Dean was too cool for you - he was a leather jacket wearing bad boy who cruised around with a different girl each week, while you mostly kept your head down and tried to do well in your classes. Sam was nice to you at home, but since you weren’t the same age, it was hard to connect to him. While Dean was satisfied being a lone wolf, you had always felt a desperate loneliness in your life. You couldn’t connect to other kids, because you were a hunter, and you couldn’t quite connect to the Winchester boys, because they were more hunter than you.

You’d heard rumors Dean was taking a date to the homecoming dance. You weren’t sure if you were even going to go.

On the evening of the dance, you’d decided to stay home. After Dean had gone and Bobby had retired for the night, you’d climbed up onto Bobby’s roof to look at the night sky. Sometimes, moments like this made you remember that you were all just the same people looking at the same sky, even with all the horrible things in the world.

It was then that you saw a car ripping through the lot, and you bolted upright. John Winchester was returning, and you tried to see if your parents were following, but there wasn’t another car in sight. You ran downstairs, hoping to catch them, but it was only John, no other shadows stretching behind him in that dark night. That was when you knew you were truly alone.

Bobby told you it would get easier. You thought he was a liar.

After a funeral of fire and a quiet ceremony, you had nowhere to go. You were lucky Bobby was kind, because you were left with him. You spent the next few days avoiding everyone you could, because the pain of being in the world was the worst thing you could have possibly imagined. You barely ate, you barely slept. All you did was lay in your bed, staring at the ceiling hoping something could bring them back.

That was when you really became friends with Dean.

One night, he slipped into your room with a sandwich and a deck of cards. You hadn’t even noticed him come in in your listless state. When he finally approached you, you bolted upright like a scared deer.

“Hey, I brought you something to eat.” He set the sandwich on your nightstand. In the dark of the night, you could barely make out his face. Suddenly, a light cut across the room. He had brought a flashlight.

You just nodded, staring at the sandwich. You knew you weren’t going to eat it.

He hummed as if he knew this was going to happen. “Wanna play cards?”

That’s how it started. He dealt and you two played every card game imaginable over the next two weeks. At some point, you began to question why he was still here. John clearly wanted to leave, but something was still tying him to Bobby’s place. You didn’t realize until later that it was you, at Dean’s request.

At some point, he started sleeping next to you, eating cold dinners with you in your room, and telling you crazy stories about his hookups and dates. He never told you hunting stories. It almost made you feel like things could become normal, like the two of you were really best friends that had met at school, and were having sleepovers every night.

“Dean,” You whispered one night, gently running a finger down his neck.

“What?” He murmured, turning to you with a soft look in his eyes.

“Thank you.” You said, eyes watering in appreciation.

“Shh.” He whispered, closing his eyes again. “Don’t thank me for anything.”

Even back then, he was hopelessly selfless.

But he vanished after that. John Winchester was dragging his boys away, and you barely had time to say goodbye before they disappeared. Then it was just you and Bobby, and even though Bobby was good to you, you fought like crazy. You were so angry at the world, angry that you couldn’t have closure, angry at everything. Bobby was the most patient man in the world with you, letting you scream and cuss and let everything out because he understood, too.

The next time you saw Dean was a few months later, the summer before your junior year. It was hot as hell and you remember standing in the car lot with Bobby, wearing a floppy baseball cap and denim shorts as dust kicked up all around you. John Winchester was back for a few weeks for a case, and he had brought his boys with him.

From then on, the three of you were a team. And you would never let that go with all of your heart.

–

Six weeks later, you couldn’t bring yourself to hate Dean Winchester.

Things had changed. You spent more time with Sam, not that you were complaining, but it was different. Sam was your best friend, like your brother. He was good company, but at the same time, sometimes you couldn’t help but see the boy he used to be. Now that the devil was hot on your tail to make Sam say yes, you couldn’t help but feel he needed a little more protection.

Dean was weird around you. You knew it was because he felt awkward, which only made you feel worse. He couldn’t look you in the eyes anymore, and your bar excursions more often than not left you alone with Sam, Dean not even in reach. He usually stumbled back to your motel room within the next morning, grumbling.

You’d changed everything with your confession. It was getting harder to be around the boys, even with Sam on your side and Cas continually popping in to urge you to do something or another. You also felt slightly betrayed by Cas, although you had spoken to no one about your conversation. It seemed so plain to you that he had been urging you to speak the truth, and now everything was different.

It came to a head when you had picked up burgers for the three of you after another case. Sam was nowhere to be seen. You dumped them on the tiny motel table, hoping to eat and just fall asleep on the couch like you usually did, when Dean came out of the bathroom, stumbling slightly. You looked up just in time to see a brunette woman with him, wrapped in a towel. You felt your stomach turn.

You cleared your throat rather dramatically. The two of them turned to look at you. Your face fell as your eyes met Dean’s. He gave you a half-smile. “Oops, sorry.”

The woman looked at you shyly and then back at Dean, giggling a bit in embarrassment. God. It was like some kind of karmic torture specifically made for you. “I’ll just go.” You said, mouth turning into a straight line.

Dean barely acknowledged you, giving you a thumbs up as he and the woman went back into the bathroom. You heard the shower turn on and felt the urge to throw up. You had no claim on Dean - he could do whatever the fuck he wanted. But you knew this had to end, right now.

You grabbed your duffel bag and put the rest of your things in it, zipping it up tightly and slinging it over your shoulder. You could hear the sounds of shower sex beginning, which just felt like a slap in the face. They really couldn’t wait until you stepped out, huh?

You went outside, feeling hot and heavy. Sam was coming in with his head down, having not expected you to step out at the same time, and you slammed into him. “Christ, Y/N, you’re a woman on a mission-” He cut himself off as he saw the expression on your face and the bag on your shoulder. “Woah, what’s happening?”

“I can’t do this anymore, Sam.” Your voice cracked, and you finally felt the dam break. Tears were flowing. “I want to help you two, you know I do. You’re my family. But I can’t do this with Dean anymore, I just can’t.”

Sam’s face softened. “Oh, Y/N.”

“Look, just call me if you need anything, and you know I’ll be there in a second. But I can’t be with you right now. I need to go somewhere else or I’ll drive myself insane.”

Sam reached for you and pulled you into a bone-crushing hug. You let yourself relax for a moment, tears staining his brown jacket. He rubbed your back slightly, and then you found yourself pushing him away. It was too much.

“Goodbye, Sam.” You whispered.

“I’ll call you.” He responded, a sad puppy-dog look on his face. Some things never changed.

You walked away from him and didn’t turn back. Maybe this would be the peace you needed, or maybe this was going to be your downfall. Either way, you knew that you had to distance yourself from the curse of Dean Winchester, or else you might fall.

–

You had gotten hot on the trail of a demon case, investigating in a small town by yourself. Demons had been popping up everywhere now that Lucifer was going to make a return, and you were doing your best to combat it. It had only been a week and a half since you’d left Sam and Dean, and you were feeling their absence. You’d only had brief stints as a solo hunter; more often than not, you had a Winchester behind you.

Sam had called you a few times, but you’d been keeping your conversations short, mostly because you felt like you were going to burst into tears every time you heard Dean in the background. Dean hadn’t reached out to you and you felt a part of you slipping away, like you’d officially severed whatever closeness the two of you had had before. You never thought something like this could have ever come between you two.

Currently, you were blasting Metallica as you drove to an abandoned warehouse you knew a few demons were hiding out at. You’d gotten some good intel from a crossroads, and were going to follow through on it by yourself. Armed with an angel blade you’d secured from Castiel, you felt unstoppable, if only because of your adrenaline rush.

You parked in the darkness far from the warehouse, intending to slink in silently. You grabbed your bag and your phone, using the cover of night to hide yourself as you approached the walls of the outside. Above, you could see a light on in the second floor.

You slid your arm inside through a broken window and unlatched a door, letting yourself in. The inside of this place was decrepit, but also huge, making it a landmine for glass and random scraps. You tiptoed carefully upstairs, trying to gauge how many demons there could possibly be. You knew there were at least 4, which was already a lot for one person.

When you peeked into the second floor at the stairs, you saw 6 demons standing in a circle around a hazardous looking fire. “Fuck,” you whispered to yourself, wondering if this was a good time to retreat. Instead, you decided to do the stupid thing.

You pulled your phone out to play a recording you’d captured a long time ago of yourself reading an exorcism. As soon as it started, all 6 demons whipped around to you, and began to charge.

“It’s the Winchester girl! Get her!”

You ran, clutching your phone as the exorcism played. You could tell it was affecting them, as they began to struggle to move, but one demon, a woman with brown hair that made you think of Dean and the woman in the shower, leapt at you, pinning you down. You twisted, trying to grab your angel blade, but she grabbed her own knife and stabbed you in the stomach. You screamed, lurching sideways as you escaped her grasp, her own body beginning to spasm at the sound of the exorcism.

You stood, shakily, as a male demon ran towards you. You kicked the brunette, her black demonic essence escaping as the male demon swung at you. You swung back, not managing to get him until his body began to convulse as well. You were running on fumes, adrenaline fueling your body as you pushed him away.

Two female demons began to wrestle control back to their bodies, and one of them willed scrap pieces of glass at you, throwing you backwards as shards of glass pierced your arm. You shrieked, trying not to feel the pain as she grabbed your phone and flung it to the ground. It wasn’t hard enough to break it, but apparently enough to crack it enough that the recording began to stutter. And that was enough. Four demons out of six had been exorcized, and the woman who had thrown the glass at you was going to kill you. Another man stood behind her, trying to catch his breath.

You played hard to get, attempting to dodge their onslaught of attacks until you sideswept the man, stabbing him with the angel blade and seeing that satisfactory orange glow of death. Only the woman remained, and she turned to you with a sneer.

“I thought your guard dogs would be coming to rescue you by now. Is this a suicide mission?”

“Shut up.” You growled, running towards her and pinning her against the wall.

“I heard you and Deany-weany had a huge breakup, is that true?” She snickered, not even caring you had her pinned.

“I said…” You stabbed her in the face, angel blade piercing her skull with ease. “Shut up.”

She laughed slightly as her body shook, and then she was dead.

You felt the veil of adrenaline leave your body in that moment, and then you could tell you were completely fucked. Your stab wound was bad, really bad, and you could see you’d lost a lot of blood. The glass that pierced your arm was deep in your skin, and you could see the way it had torn your flesh. You felt sick as you suddenly collapsed.

“Little ol’ me, taking down six demons?” You felt delusional, laughing a little as you reached for your cracked phone. “I’m a miracle worker.”

You dialed the first number you knew. He picked up within half a second, despite everything.

“Y/N? What’s going on?” Dean’s voice crackled through the speaker, although you could barely make him out with how broken your phone was. You wondered if you were hallucinating his response, too.

“Dean,” You muttered, breathing labored.

“Y/N? What’s wrong?” His voice was growing panicked.

You let out a sharp laugh. “Fuck.”

“Where the hell are you?!”

“See you later, Dean.” You whispered, closing your eyes. You could feel darkness coming over you.

“Y/N!? Wait!” His voice grew fainter and fainter until it was just a dim thought in the distance, and then you disappeared into the dark.

–

When you woke up, you were surprised you were still alive.

You gained consciousness so quickly you felt it was almost a dream. Suddenly and quickly, you sat up, too alert for your liking and too uncertain about what was going on to be lethargic. You looked around.

You were in the hospital, a heart monitor beeping next to you. There were thick bandages wrapped around your midsection, and your left arm was covered in stitches. You pulled back the blanket and saw bruises across your legs.

“Y’know, I always thought Sam was better for you.”

You whipped to your right and saw Dean, alone, sitting in a hospital chair. It looked like he hadn’t slept in weeks.

“What?” You whispered, not daring to believe your eyes.

“He’s a better man than me, Y/N.” He said, looking at you with those soft emerald eyes. “Because if I were him, I’d have beat the shit out of me a long time ago.”

“What the hell are you talking about, Dean?” You asked, confused. The brightness of the room made it hard to concentrate, like you still couldn’t tell if this was real.

“I’m sorry I pushed you away. I’m an idiot.” He reached for you and you let him, your hands engulfed in his. Dean was always so warm, his hands calloused and rough from years and years of hard work. The way you fit together; it was natural.

“You don’t have to be sorry for anything.” You replied, finally understanding. “It’s not your fault you don’t have feelings for me.”

“That’s the thing, though.” He chuckled wryly like you’d told a bad joke. “I…”

“You… what?”

“I do. I have feelings for you.”

You sat in stunned silence. First there was anger, but then confusion. You couldn’t understand what he was saying.

“Okay, again, what the hell are you talking about?” You cocked your head at him, squinting your eyes in what you could only assume was in a very Castiel manner.

“Everyone I’ve ever loved I’ve seen get hurt.” Dean said, tightening his grip on you. “Everyone in my life is always in danger. And you…” He chuckled again, and you saw the hint of tears forming in his eyes. “You were always the best of all of them, y’know? You never put up with my shit. You let me sing in the car. You let me play my music louder than anything when we used to drive to school together.”

He paused, and you waited with bated breath for him to continue.

“I just thought if I pushed you away you’d leave and find a better life.” He said, finally. “Because it’s what you deserve. Because I can’t give you what you deserve.”

You stared at him, shocked. Even in the worst cases, even in his own stupid way, Dean was still the most idiotically selfless man you knew. You let out a sigh.

“You know, I’m not some helpless damsel.” You said, squeezing his hands back.

“God, sweetheart, do I know that. You took out six fucking demons by yourself, killer.” Dean almost laughed. “I’d be angry if I wasn’t so relieved you’re still alive.”

“Right, then, you know!” You cried. “You know I’ve been taking care of myself this whole time. If I wanted a different life, I’d choose it. But as it stands, I want this life with you.”

You leaned in closer to Dean, as close as the proximity between a hospital bed and a chair could give you. He looked confused. “But why?”

“Dean, road-tripping with you and your brother, stopping the apocalypse, fighting monsters, saving people - that’s as close as perfect as life can get, I think.”

Tears dripped down his face. “Y/N, I’m so, so sorry for everything.”

“You better be damn sorry!” You laughed this time, pressing your forehead against his. “I can’t believe how big of an idiot you are.”

“Me neither,” he whispered, glancing at your lips for a moment before looking back at you. “Can I…?”

“You don’t even have to ask.”

He pressed his lips against yours, pulling you closer to him. His arms tugged at your waist, bringing you in, closer, closer, closer still until you felt there couldn’t possibly be any distance between you. He was so desperate, not letting you pull away as you made out on the hospital bed, hands pulling at you and clawing at your hair. When you finally pulled away, you were breathless.

When you looked at each other again, there were stars in his eyes. “You know everybody else I’d been with was meaningless before this, right?”

With the way he was looking at you, there was no way you could ever doubt him. But still, you pulled away. He looked hurt. “I want to believe you, Dean. But you still hurt me.”

He nodded solemnly, in understanding.

“But I want to give this a shot, if you do.”

He perked up, a smile spreading across his face. “Of course I do, baby.”

You smiled at that. “Let’s take it one step at a time, okay?”

He nodded, and then sat up like he remembered something. “Before I forget.” Dean reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out two rather squashed looking sandwiches wrapped in plastic. In his other hand, he took out a deck of cards. “I thought you might be hungry, and maybe we could eat over a game of cards?”

You split into the biggest grin you could muster. “I’d love that.”

#supernatural x reader #dean winchester x reader #dean x reader #dean winchester #sam winchester #supernatural one shot #supernatural fanfiction #reader insert

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eternallyhyucks · 1 month

Text

first love | choi yeonjun, wc: 2.5k

— unrequited love, angst

— this is my first long fic pls bare w me😭

𖤐 ྀ

your crush on yeonjun wasn’t like the rest of the crushes you’ve had in your life. this time you were actually friends and you spent a lot of time together. but after a while, you felt like maybe your crush was more than just that.

the first time you met yeonjun was on his first day at your job. you had only started about 2 weeks before and he walked up to the register saying it was his first day. even before he walked up you had noticed how cute he was when he stood in the line, so when he said he was working there, you felt a little flustered.

so his first day began, and you had to start training him. unfortunately for him, you were also still a trainee yourself. about an hour into the shift, while you were showing him how to make a drink, your other coworker came up behind the two of you to see how you were doing and noticed the color of the drink was a little off. he took the cup in his hand, smelled the tea, and that’s when you realized your mistake: you used to wrong tea. you and yeonjun giggled about it but you still couldn’t help but feel a little embarassed.

before your shift ended, you built up the courage to ask yeonjun for his instagram. he agreed and you started looking for a sticky note for him to write on. after looking for a minute, you realized the store probably ran out so you just grabbed a sharpie and told him to write it on your hand. the moment he took your hand to write his username, you felt your breath hitch.

as soon as you got home, you went to follow him and as you were scrolling through his highlights, you noticed he had a girlfriend. you laughed a little because it made sense.

so you moved on. at least it wasn’t an actual crush. you just thought he was cute.

—

so the two of your continued working together and became pretty close, along with the rest of your coworkers.

and any thought of having a crush on yeonjun was gone.

.. until a couple months later.

after a long closing shift together, you felt kind of giddy on the drive home. weird.

two days later you had another shift together, and afterwards everyone was going to get dinner together.

you felt the same weird, slightly giddy feeling again during the shift.

during the dinner, you two didn’t sit at the same table, so you weren’t thinking about him, but when you were near him you felt something in your stomach.

a couple days went by and you had a shift with him again. this time you went home and realized you might like him. you had to remind yourself that you can’t, he has a girlfriend. and yet, your brain wouldn’t listen to you.

a week went by and he randomly texted you saying he had to tell you something.

what’s up?

i feel like you should know since we’re pretty close but my girlfriend and i broke up

oh.

omg i’m sorry

it’s okay, ig it was inevitable

of all the times they could’ve broken up, it had to be when you realized you had a crush on him. of course.

unfortunately for you, the two of you started texting each other way more than usual, which made your crush grow even more.

—

after a couple weeks of silently crushing, you decided to tell your best friend about it. for some reason, she said she saw it from a mile away. as in, ever since your first interaction with him.

you also chose to tell your closest coworker about “someone you have a crush on” without revealing anything about who it is and she kept feeding into your delusions saying he definitely liked you back. but there was no way he did. he had just gotten out of a pretty long relationship. even if he did, you didn’t want to be a rebound.

a month went by and your crush on yeonjun had only gotten worse. the two of you texted everyday. he told you random details about his day and he texted you good morning and goodnight and he even told you to have sweet dreams?? what kind of friend does that? everytime he was around you, you felt a weird tension.

one day, you and a small group of your coworkers planned to hang out together, yeonjun included. he came a little later than everyone else because he was stuck in traffic, but the moment he walked in, you felt awkward. not because of him but because you wanted to make sure he didn’t feel the same tension you did.

the whole time you were hanging out, it felt like he was always lingering around you. either you’re walking next to each other or hes simply just standing by you. maybe it was just you, but whenever you’d walk next to each other, your hands kept brushing against each other.

you kept avoiding him, but somehow he appeared anyway. after a while, everyone wanted to get drinks, so you walked to your cars. you needed to fill up your gas, so you said you’d meet everyone there. in your head it felt smart since that way you could sit somewhere away from him.

after filling the gas in your car, you drove up to the drink shop and saw that there was one seat open next to your friend. smiling, you sat there and felt a sense of relief since there was a person between you and yeonjun.

unfortunately things will never go your way because 10 minutes later, one of your friend’s boyfriend came in and since yeonjun was sitting next to her, he got up to give the seat up for her boyfriend and instead pulled up a chair next to you.

you avoided eye contact and focused on talking to everyone else because you couldn’t stand looking at him in case your face heated up.

he was always so close to you. always touching shoulders, touching arms, barely any space between you.

you always wondered if it meant anything to him. did his heart race like yours did?

—

2 months into your crazy infatuation of yeonjun, he was the same as always. touchy, flirty and knowing exactly how to make you feel flustered. even if he didn’t actually know that he was doing it. that is, until your birthday.

he had decided on his college of choice for the upcoming school year and got posted on the school’s introduction instagram page, so of course you and your other friends reposted it on your stories.

you spent the day with some of your friends who came back home for break and the night with your family. after a night full of celebration of you, you went to bed with a full heart and checked your messages. there you saw yeonjun talking about a girl that slid up on his friend’s story asking about him and calling him cute and how he’s been texting her all day.

you felt sick to your stomach. of course he didn’t feel the same way you did. of course he didn’t. but why was he acting the way he was? why did he do that with you?

you had planned to hang out with yeonjun and your other friends the weekend of your birthday and now you didn’t really want to see him at all, but you couldn’t cancel now so you thought you might as well make the most of it.

—

the day started out nice, the six of you met up at the mall you worked at and made your way to the friend group’s designated driver’s car.

you made a mental note not to sit next to yeonjun, so as he got in first, you made sure to get in last. you wanted today to be fun.

as the day went on, you noticed yeonjun was on his phone a lot and everytime you glanced at what he could be doing, it was always instagram dms. figures.

you weren’t disappointed about him texting the girl anymore, it was the fact that he was on his phone so much when you all took the time to plan a group hangout and spend time together. and of course it hurt that he was also on his phone because he was talking to someone else. the worst part was that everyone else in the car noticed it too. they also noticed how much it hurt you, no matter how hard you tried to hide it. but it seemed like yeonjun was the only one that didn’t seem to notice it.

you realized after a while that there was no point in sulking the whole day so you decided to just ignore him completely. wherever he went, you went somewhere else. when you all went to eat, you sat at a table of six with three seats on each side. he put his stuff down on the left side and went to the restroom, so you sat on the right side.

but when he came back, he moved his stuff to the seat next to yours and gave you a reassuring look. why was he doing that?

the entire time you ate, you didn’t really talk to him and after a while you could tell that he realized what you were doing.. which made you feel bad because he became quiet.

since you were out for your birthday you wanted to take polaroids with everyone individually. you knew that it would have been strange for you to get a picture with everyone but yeonjun and you didn’t want to ruin the air for anyone, so you decided to push your feelings down and ignore it for the rest of the day.

as you posed for the picture with him, you both leaned into each other and put up two thumbs up. an awkward pose the two of you always did. you smiled at him to pretend like you were okay and he smiled back.

when you all went back to the car, you had one person between the two of you. after a couple minutes of the ride you got a call from your mom asking when you’d be home and got a little panicked since you didn’t want to get in trouble. throughout the ride, you didn’t talk much, not only because you were nervous about getting in trouble with your parents, but also the whole situation with yeonjun.

he noticed your silence and as you were looking out the window, you felt a hand on your back. he was trying to reassure you that it’d be okay. that gesture in itself make you want to cry.

why did he keep caring about you like that? were you just overreacting?

—

the day after you all hung out for your birthday was his last shift at the shop you worked at. you opened the store and he came in an hour after. you couldn’t just ignore him, so you tried your best to act normal.

the shift was pretty quiet since you didn’t really know what to say but you chose to push your feelings down again because it wouldn’t be his last day ever again.

at the end of the shift, he was cleaning up in the back when you went to go put something away. as you walked away, he called you back.

“wait come back here” he pulled at your sleeve.

you stood in front of him, confused.

he took two steps forward and gave you a hug. “thank you”

you pulled away and looked at him with a sad look on your face. “for what?”

“i dont know, you’re a really good friend. you know that?”

you smiled, “of course i know that” and as you turned away, your smile faded.

—

you realized that you had to get over yeonjun, but it was harder than you thought.

when you first started liking him, the two of you had made plans to get your ears pierced together for his birthday. though you thought the plan would fall through, it didn’t, and suddenly there you were in his car on the way get food before the appointment.

you bought him two gifts for his birthday: matching bracelets that he said he wanted, and keychains with his favorite artists albums on them.

before eating, you gave them to him and he started unwrapping them in the car. he opened the bracelets and immediately said,

“i knew you’d get these.”

“literally how”

“because when i mentioned it the other day you told me not to buy them”

you laughed as he opened the keychains.

he gasped when he saw them, “THIS IS SO COOL,, wait is this why you asked everyone for their favorite albums?”

“yes and i got lucky since you were the only one that replied”

he started putting them on his keys and looked over at you.

“you know when i’m in college and i’m walking around campus, i could probably pick up girls with these”

you rolled your eyes, “i’ll take them back right now”

—

the same week you had gotten your ears pierced, you also got a new job! which happened to be the same place yeonjun was again…

but it wasn’t him that got the job for you, it was your other old coworker since she knew you were looking to leave your old job.

before you were scheduled, your new manager was debating whether to put you earlier or later in the month, but yeonjun made sure they made it earlier so that you could work with him on your first shift.

usually something like that would have made your head spin, but you were finally getting the hang of your insane crush on the boy, so you brushed it off.

your first day also happened to be his last before he left for college, and although you still hadn’t gotten over him, you knew that once yeonjun left for college, things would be really different. you just hoped you’d still talk to each other.

so when you were parting ways, he gave you a long hug. one of those hugs where you can feel the love from the other person.

you pulled away first and put out your pinky.

“don’t be a stranger, yeonjun”

he interlocked his pinky with yours.

“never in a million years”

—

about a month after yeonjun left for college, he texted the group chat with just a picture of him and a girl holding hands.

that’s when you remembered him telling you about a girl he met at his college’s orientation when you had went to get your ears pierced together.

instead of feeling sad, you really just felt like it was time to get over him.

so with time, you did. he was really happy with her and that was all that mattered to you.

your friend’s happiness.

—

epilogue

y/n really did get over yeonjun. they didn’t feel sick when they saw him. they could talk to him and not feel tension, and with time they even talked to each other about the people they both liked together.

but deep down, a part of y/n really felt like maybe they were in love with him.

maybe yeonjun was their first love.

and do people ever really get over their first love?

taglist!

@izchone , @baekswoons , @jiwon-44 , @junityy , @pr0dbeomgyu , @neos127 , @fiantomartell , @wccycc , @koishua , @changminurheart , @rainbowglitteramythyst , @baekhyunstruly , @soobin-chois , @yjwfav , @fairybinie , @sleepingisweak

!! unable to tag bolded

—send an ask if you would like to be a part of my taglist!!

#unfortunately this is a hashtag true story #i hope this made sense😭😭#yeonjun #choi yeonjun #yeonjun imagines #yeonjun scenarios #yeonjun angst #yeonjun fluff #txt #txt scenarios #txt imagines #txt angst #txt fluff #eternallyhyucks

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bun-lapin · 9 months

Note

Are you still taking requests? If yes, can I request headcanons for Malleus, Deuce, Azul + the Savanaclaw Bois with a reader with a crush in someone from their dorm, but the reader's crush isn't them. It's an NPC

It's ok if you don't want to also

Darling Anon, I loved this request so much that I accidentally wrote two versions over the weekend! I couldn't stop thinking about this from both a supporting platonic and unrequited love viewpoint for the boys so I wrote both. Hopefully, that's ok! Thanks so much for sending such a cool request <3

CW: unrequited feelings, some angst

🐉 Malleus:

If he doesn't have a crush on you: Malleus immediately launches into stealthy protection mode! He personally sets out to learn everything about this guy and whether or not he deserves to be with you. He constantly pulls him aside for intense questioning to find out what kind of personality he has. If your crush passes the interrogations, Malleus then enrolls this poor Diasomnia student in personal combat lessons with Lilia to make sure he has what it takes to protect you.

If he has a crush on you: Malleus is so shocked and confused when he learns of your crush that isn't him. He doesn't know what to do or say, so he becomes a little cold and distant towards you. He's still mostly polite when you run into each other, but you can tell something is bothering him. When you finally confront him, he tells you very directly that it's because he likes you and that he knows you like someone else. He doesn't ask you to stop liking your original crush. In a sad and quiet voice, he simply says, "I'll wait for you."

♠️ Deuce:

If he doesn't have a crush on you: Deuce is the ultimate wingman! When he learns of your crush on a fellow Heartslabyul student, he offers all of his support and asks if you want any help approaching your crush. Every time you go to speak with your crush, Deuce is there to hype you up and be your personal cheerleader.

If he has a crush on you: When you tell Deuce you like this random student in his dorm, he gets so flustered that he blurts out that he likes you. Before you can say anything, he runs away and later you hear that Deuce almost got into a fist fight with your crush. After he's calmed down a little, Deuce finds you and lays out everything he's feeling. His expression is full of confusion, anger, hurt, fear. He only asks, "Why him? I just want to know why you like him and not me?"

🐙 Azul:

If he doesn't have a crush on you: Azul immediately pulls all of the info he has on your crush and also dispatches the Leech brothers to do additional reconnaissance work. Knowledge is power and he wants to make sure you know exactly what you're getting with this guy. Any secrets this Octavinelle student thought he had is soon no longer a secret. Azul gets all the details on his friends, family, financial status, academics, etc. and compiles everything in a complete dossier for you.

If he has a crush on you: Azul reacts to news of your crush the same way he would if he didn't have a crush on you. However, the key difference now is that he collects the information way more quickly and almost in a panic. Once he has all the information he can find on his romantic rival, he considers several plans of attack. The most attractive option to him is to either secretly bribe or threaten his rival into never talking to you again. But Azul knows that would make you sad and he never wants to make you feel that way. So he decides to be realistic and simply gives you the information without saying anything about his feelings. Looking a little sad, he just says, "I'll always be here for you if you need anything."

🦁 Leona:

If he doesn't have a crush on you: Outwardly, Leona acts like he doesn't really care. However, after he learns of your crush on a Savanaclaw student, he secretly keeps an eye on your crush whenever he can. He quietly observes him, making sure he's not a bad guy or someone who'd be disrespectful towards you. If he's found to be lacking, Leona will directly tell you and offer to beat him up. If the Savanaclaw student passes Leona's observations, then he'll order him to go talk to you first.

If he has a crush on you: Leona is usually really good at keeping his emotions in check, but you can tell he's really irritated when you tell him about your crush. When you ask him what's wrong, Leona will brush off your questions and keep insisting that everything is fine. However, Leona continues to act annoyed and keeps assigning a bunch of hard jobs and extra tasks to your crush whenever possible. When you finally confront him and refuse to let him go without a real answer, Leona tells you that he likes you. He looks frustrated and sad as he says, "I want to be as important to you as you are to me. I can't believe I'm in second place again…"

🍩 Ruggie:

If he doesn't have a crush on you: When he first finds out about your crush, Ruggie teases you a little about it (in a way that makes the both of you laugh). Afterwards, you and Ruggie will frequently trade gossip about your crush while eating snacks and talking about your feelings in a light-hearted way. If you ever start to feel anxious about talking to your crush, Ruggie always lightens the mood with a good joke and surprisingly good advice.

If he has a crush on you: Ruggie cracks a joke as always but, when it comes to your crush, the jokes get a little mean-spirited. Even though it sounds like he's joking, whenever Ruggie talks about your crush he seems bitter and frustrated. When you ask Ruggie what's wrong, he initially plays it off as a joke. Eventually though, he seems to give up and he admits that he's jealous of this guy because he likes you too. Looking tired and defeated, he says "Honestly, I get why you'd choose him over me. It's not like I have much to offer you."

🐺 Jack:

If he doesn't have a crush on you: Jack gets really protective over you and treats your feelings very seriously. He tells you everything he knows about the guy and offers to talk to him for you or go with you to talk to him. Jack makes it very clear to your crush that if he ever does anything to make you sad, then Jack will do everything he can to protect your honor.

If he has a crush on you: Jack gets really quiet and thoughtful when you tell him about your crush. For the next few days, he avoids you and you can never seem to catch him. Eventually, Jack sees that his behavior is making you upset so he finally meets up with you. He tells you in a very straightforward way that he likes you and that he had hoped you liked him to. You've never seen him look so disappointed and brokenhearted. With a face filled with regret, he admits, "You're such an important member of my pack, I guess I just took it for granted that you'd always be around."

#request writing #twst #twisted wonderland #twst imagines #twst headcanons #twst x reader #malleus draconia #deuce spade #azul ashengrotto #leona kingscholar #ruggie bucchi #jack howl #angst #unrequited love #bun-lapin écrit

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livinginshambles · 10 months

Text

Preview: If I could take it all back | James Potter

Pairing: James Potter x Fem!Reader

Notes: I suppose this could be read as a standalone without the short context of the first part :) No proofreading (yet), enjoy!

Also, am I supposed to tag you guys for previews? Because I'm not doing it, to avoid spamming you guys, but idk what you guys think works best.

__________________________

James plopped down on his bed in exhaustion after their first day back at Hogwarts and his mind wandered off to you.

“Bloody hell, is it me, or was that ceremony more tedious than ever before?” Sirius complained after he too dropped down on his bed across the room.

“Just gets longer each year,” Remus groaned in dismay, stuffing his face in his pillow with a deep sigh.

“And that choir,” Peter chimed in. He didn’t even have to finish his sentence, the rest of the marauders dramatically joining in on complaining.

Remus’ eyes lingered on James, fully aware who she fancied, but opting to not throw that in the conversation.

“What, like personality or looks?” You tilted your head in question.

“Uh, both?” Sirius asked.

You shrugged. “Sure.”

Full fic

#james potter x fem!reader #james potter x reader #james potter x y/n #james potter x you #james potter angst #james potter fic #james potter fluff #james potter imagine #marauders #marauders era #marauders x reader #marauders fanfiction #marauders fanfic #marauders fic #james potter fanfic #james potter fanfiction

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sapphicantics · 29 days

Text

Don’t Want Another Lover

Pairing: Janis Imi’ike x fem!reader

Summary: Janis ditches a blind date you’d spent helping her prepare for and you confront her at a party to find out why.

Contents: best friends to lovers trope, pining!Janis, talks of unrequited love, Janis is constantly talking about being alone,

Word count: 1.4K

Authors note: This was not supposed to be the next fic I posted but Towa put me in a chokehold with her song and I’ve spent all weekend working on this so here we are. Also imma say this now, I guarantee you guys are gonna get tired of me because the amount of fics running through my head inspired by this song is fucking ridiculous but we’ll see if I actually stick with them and they’ll come out. If you haven’t already, listen to the song down below.

— — — —

Janis Imi’ike can’t believe she let herself be talked into this again.

The this in question is yet another date her best friends somehow convinced her to go on with a girl they’re sure she’ll like because she needs to put herself out there if she ever wants to get a girlfriend. Janis had scoffed at this because Damian doesn’t even like girls so what would he know about getting a girlfriend.

Still, she agreed if only to get over this ridiculous crush she has.

Except getting over her crush is damn near impossible when said crush is also one of her best friends who originally started this whole ‘get Janis a girlfriend’ thing in the first place and is currently helping her get ready for date number whatever.

“Where are you guys going for your date again?”

Janis looks up from her sketchbook, watching you rummage around in her closet. You’re dressed in a white crop top and a pair of black cargo sweatpants that are hanging low on your hips, and Janis can’t stop her eyes from tracing over the skin on display.

“Janis?”

Janis wonders if your skin is as sensitive as it looks; if a single finger would have goosebumps raising on your flesh.

“Janis?”

Janis wonders how it would feel to press kisses along your skin; how many kisses it’d take to make you melt and turn you to putty in her hands.

“Janis!”

She jumps, her eyes shooting up to yours. “What? Sorry, I- I didn’t hear what you said.”

You chuckle, shaking your head in amusement. “I asked where you were going for your date.”

“Oh, uh,” Janis licks her lips in thought as she tries to remember exactly where she’s supposed to be meeting this date, Laura she thinks this one’s name is, and what they were supposed to be doing. “We’re going to an art museum.”

You nod and turn back to her closet, rummaging around for a few more moments before emerging with several items in hand. You toss them all on the bed and tug Janis up by her arm, and she has to bite back a groan as she prepares to be turned into a human mannequin.

If it was anyone else, she would’ve snatched her arm away already, but Janis has never been able to deny you anything, so she stands in place while you hold up different articles of clothing until you’ve seemingly decided on the perfect outfit for her; leaving the accessories and makeup to complete the look up to her.

She turns to you once she’s finished and her breath hitches as you reach up and adjust the necklaces around her neck, your fingers tracing lightly on her skin and it takes everything in Janis to fight back the sigh of content that so desperately wants to escape her lips.

She’s done such a good job hiding her feelings from you and she can’t reveal them now. She’s already had several close calls before and she can’t risk destroying her friendship with you over feelings you’ll never return.

No matter how much Janis wishes it was different, she knows the way you’re smoothing down her shirt and brushing off her shoulders is purely platonic.

“You look beautiful.”

Janis blinks her eyes open, unsure when exactly she closed them, and she gulps at the bright smile on your face.

You seem more excited about this date than her and you’re not even the one going on it. She wonders if you’d look that excited if you were going on this date, and her heart clenches in response because she knows you wouldn’t be going with her.

She pushes back how much that thought hurts and instead gives you a smile. “Thank you, it’s all thanks to you.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Jay, you’re always beautiful. The most beautiful girl in the world.”

Janis swears she’s going to fucking combust if another compliment falls from your mouth and she has to act like it doesn’t mean anything to her when it means absolutely everything to her.

She can practically hear Damian’s voice in her head calling her hopeless — which she is, but she doesn’t need his two cents even if he isn’t here to actually give it.

Thankfully (or maybe not depending on how she looks at it), she doesn’t have to dwell on that too much longer because it’s time for her to leave if she wants to make her date on time — which she totally didn’t forget about until just now — and while she’d much rather stay here with you, she’s not rude enough to bail 15 minutes before the initial meetup.

“Have fun, Jay,” you call. “I can’t wait to hear all about it.”

Admittedly, the date is nice and Janis does vibe with Laura, but she ends up cutting the date short because she keeps picturing you in Lauras’ place instead and that’s not fair to anyone.

She does not tell you that, of course.

She’s actually been avoiding telling you anything about the date which is only making you suspicious about all the things that could’ve happened and made Janis shut down on you like this.

It all comes to a head at a party which you convinced Janis ( and invited Damian because that man needs no convincing when it comes to parties ) to come to and got ample amounts of alcohol in your system.

You end up stealing Janis away from her corner where she’s spent majority of the time glaring at anyone who isn’t you or Damian attempting to talk to her and drag her into an empty room upstairs away from the party.

You’re not tipsy, but you’re also not drunk enough to where you can’t consent to anything or will forget about tonight.

Janis knows this as she’s gotten drunk with you multiple times and she knows you get bold when you’re like this, but she still doesn’t expect the words that come out of your mouth once the door closes behind you.

“Janis, what the fuck?”

Pure confusion laces her face, but you continue before she can say anything.

“I just ran into Laura and she told me you dipped out in the middle of the date.”

“Damian called me, said he was having an emergency.”

Janis can’t seem to deny you anything, but lying to you is apparently really easy. Of course, she’s lying to keep you in her life so that’s probably why it’s so easy.

“Bullshit, Imi’ike,” you scoff. “You’ve been crying about wanting a girlfriend, doing absolutely fuck all to get one, and then you keep accepting to go on these dates I’m setting up for you that are going absolutely no where, for what reason?”

Janis has the decency to look guilty, but in her defense she never asked you to do any of that. She was perfectly content to remain single and alone for the rest of her life while everyone else in her life got to fall in love and find their happy endings.

It fucking hurts that she won’t get hers.

And that combined with the alcohol in her system seems to be enough to make the truth finally come out.

“I don’t want a fucking girlfriend, I want you as my girlfriend!”

Silence falls between the two of you and Janis takes the time to process what she’s said.

Fuck.

Janis decides she fucking hates Tequila and is never going to drink again. It’s cost her a 6+ year friendship and Janis swears when she’s older she’s absolutely going to destroy Tequila manufacturers for this.

“Say it again.”

She can’t believe you’d actually be this cruel to her.

( Somewhere in the back of her head, Janis can hear a voice that is fed up with her shit calling her an idiot and a useless fucking lesbian.

It’s Damian again, she’s sure, and she wishes he’d stop popping up in her head at these times. )

“Janis, please say it again,” you whisper. “Say it again so I know it’s real and not in my head this time.”

It takes a moment for the words to register in Janis’ head and there’s a slither of hope in her heart as she stares at you. Slowly, she releases a breath and speaks. “I want you as my girlfriend.”

“Then kiss me and prove it.”

“Are you sure?”

You place your hands on her neck and her hands fall to your hips, pulling you flush against her. Your lips are inches from hers, breaths mingling together, and if she moves the slightest bit, she’ll kiss you.

“Positive.”

But that’s what you want.

And well, when has Janis ever been able to deny you anything?

#janis imi'ike #janis imiike x reader #janis ‘imi’ike #janis ‘imi’ike x reader #janis ‘imi’ike x fem!reader #janis imiike x fem!reader #janis x reader #mean girls 2024 #Spotify

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anystalker707 · 1 year

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Maybe unrequited feelings

Pairing: Vinsmoke Sanji x [gender neutral] Reader Words: ~ 2 800 Summary: The way he treated you made you wonder if he didn't like you, but it seems to be quite the opposite. Tags: Sanji is just a babygirl / Shy Sanji A/N: I'm still learning how to write for op

MASTERLIST

It felt off, really. Were you ugly or something? Maybe annoying. Or just not his type. It all always bugged you a little, an insistent thought in the back of your mind that always resurfaced whenever you saw Sanji with heart eyes pampering whoever he found attractive. Something shifted in your chest whenever you watched it happen, so it wasn’t much different now, watching him talk to whatever person that sat two tables away from you.

That was supposed to be a nice day, shaped for relaxing and clearing your minds on this new island. The crew had divided itself in two parts at some point, with Luffy, Franky, Usopp, Brook and Zoro wandering off at the moment they saw the local commerce, an activity you and the others weren’t really up to, given the intense heat. In the light of this, at the moment, you sat at a small table outside a little restaurant with Nami, Robin, Chopper, and, previously, Sanji. His drink sat unattended at the table; its cold temperature clashed with the hot weather and resulted in a puddle of condensation at the base of the fancy glass.

“You seem a little off, (y/n). Are you sure you are alright?” Chopper asked. His eyes barely made it over the table and his straw made a comically long turn to go above the glass then down to reach his lips.

Your eyes averted to Chopper, but you just pursed your lips in a little funny pout that made him chuckle, so you couldn’t help and smile a little. “I’m fine, Chopper, don’t worry! Just thinking a little, ‘s all!” Why would you talk about it, in the first place? You were sure Robin was tired of your venting.

Nami raised an eyebrow at you, however, crossing her arms over her chest as she leaned back against the chair. “Are you sure? I mean, I’ve been noticing something...” She trailed off, averting her eyes away in a badly played clueless manner; you looked at Robin out of instinct, and the chuckle she gave you in response had your cheeks warming up while you sat back on the chair, covering your face with your hands.

“Waaa, don’t leave me in the dark!” Chopper cried out, tugging at you and then at Nami. “What’s it? What’s it?” He almost walked over the table to do the same to Robin.

“Well, let’s say that Mx. (y/n) would enjoy a little more attention from our cook.” Robin smiled. You wondered how amusing the situation was for her. Even Nami herself seemed to have fun, giggling into her hand.

“Yeah, maybe...” You trailed off, letting your hands run through your hair, and decided to take a large sip of the drink to end it already and perhaps clean your mind a little.

“Eh?” Chopper looked at you for a long moment. “Then you can just—”

“(Y/n) has a crush on Sanji, Chopper!” The volume of Nami’s voice not only had your cheeks burning bright red, but also looking at Sanji to make sure he didn’t hear anything while Chopper made a scandal, as if he had heard the biggest gossip of his whole life—part of you hoped Sanji did catch on it and came over, even if it wouldn’t have the best outcome.

“B—But him, (y/n)?” Chopper’s jaw dropped. “H—He’s nice and all, but—”

“Look at the way you put it!” You clicked your tongue, shaking your head at Nami. “It’s not a crush... I’m just... interested. I would at least like to be friends with him, closer and all, but he just, um, treats me as if I were still new to the crew and all.” A sigh escaped your nose and your eyes drifted away from everyone else—you didn’t need their pitiful looks. What if it sounded a little too attention seeking? It wasn’t really your priority. Everything was fine as long as you and Sanji worked together just right during the fights and didn’t get in the way of each other’s objectives.

Nami hummed as she tilted her head. She didn’t remember Sanji ever directly asking you for your favorite dish so he could prepare it nor at least once urging to be paired up with you when you split up on any plan or adventure. “Now that you’ve mentioned it...” She raised her eyebrows and looked over at Sanji, scratching her chin. “Maybe there’s actually something up with this.”

“Would you like any of us to find out what is happening, (y/n)?” Robin asked you. “I suppose it could be of certain help since you want to be friends with him, at minimum.”

Worrying them wasn’t good—it made a weight set itself in the back of your mind—, but at the same time, something in your chest insisted that you accept it. Maybe there would be improvements you weren’t aware of at the moment. Silence your mind, even. That would be a great improvement, actually, not having you worry about something so constantly, as silly as it was.

“Well, I am not opposed to that,” you mumbled, absentmindedly playing with the straw inside the empty glass. “Just don’t tell him that I, um, am interested. I trust you.” Those words had Nami immediately grinning, rubbing her palms together; you glared at her along with Chopper, though he had more of curious eyes. “Correction, I trust Robin!”

You left after a quick exchange of words, once again telling how you trusted them and reminding them of your condition, this time deciding to go after Luffy and the others to find out what they were up to.

Walking with the others was fun. It was no surprise that Zoro was not with them, but you managed to find him after some point. At first, you were just making sure not to let him get lost, although you eventually got to a point in which you didn’t recognize your surroundings and didn’t see the others as well. As much as you insisted, Zoro just said you two would eventually find them again because you weren’t even lost. Technically you did find them, but it was just when the sun had already disappeared in the horizon, and dinner was already being served at Sunny.

“Hi!” You called as you took a seat next to Nami, happy to be at the ship again, and eyed her bowl with a hum of appreciation. “Sorry, we got lost!”

“We did not!” Zoro retorted; you chuckled with a roll of eyes, but wouldn’t argue, not this time.

“We—”

“Here, Mx. (y/n).” Sanji stood there bowing down, with a cloth over the arm he didn’t use to hand out the bowl with food that he had served for you. He was there, noticing you. Wow, you existed to Sanji as something aside from a fighting partner. “I hope you enjoy it.”

“Thank you.” Your voice was weaker than you’d like it to be. The bowl was warm, heating up your hands after a long day of holding glasses and cups of cold drinks, and the taste was better than ever. Nami’s eyes on you were difficult not to notice, however, you decided to ignore it for now, continuing to eat. What did they tell Sanji?

The empty dishes were set aside, being collected by Sanji and Chopper, while you talked with Nami and Robin, leaned against the railing while observing the waves crash against the side of Sunny. Once loud and crowded, now the island sat quiet since the people at the streets near the shore were in their homes already, plus that Zoro and Luffy already snored away wherever they were; the rest were probably off to their quarters or messing with anything else in the peace of the night.

Your talk with the girls had already faded away, leaving you busy with your thoughts instead, or at least until Nami spoke up again. “I’m going to be right back,” she said, leaving with no further explanation, disappearing inside the kitchen.

“Maybe I should go to sleep as well.” You yawned. Your muscles complained a bit with the way you rolled your shoulders in a futile attempt to get rid of the weight that clung to them. Lying down on your soft mattress would feel simply perfect after a long day like that.

Robin placed a hand over your forearm before you could move. “Can you just wait for Nami to return, with me?”

“Well, sure.” Just a little longer wouldn’t hurt. The thing is, it wasn’t just a little longer. You couldn’t keep your feet in the same place for long enough. You had spent the whole day walking around the city, so lying down wasn’t a bad idea at all. "Robin—"

"I think she is not coming back." Robin chuckled. "Come on." She nodded back to the kitchen—aw damn, she dragged you to the kitchen instead of the quarters' direction.

The kitchen was all quiet. Only Chopper was there, asleep in the corner, and the other two were nowhere to be seen. Robin moved to get a glass of water for herself and you did the same, hoping it would help you fight the tiredness a little. It did, thankfully, because Robin was taking you downstairs next. Why would she go to the bar, anyways?

Getting closer, you could hear Nami’s voice. She sounded stern. "...and you'll open that damn mouth of yours and speak, you hear me?" A hand rested on her hip while she held her index finger out at Sanji's face, looking like a mother scolding her kid, when you walked in.

"Yes, Nami-swam!" Sanji bit on his handkerchief that he held, sniffling and crying dramatically as he nodded frantically, with red cheeks. His wide eyes observed Nami proudly move back and cross her arms, with a smile lingering over her lips when she finally acknowledged your and Robin's presence. Oh. The idea of what could happen already had your cheeks heating up.

"We did have a talk earlier today, as you had asked, (y/n)." Nami’s humor took a turn again, turning light and sweet as it always was most of the time when it came to you.

A soft sigh escaped your nose; you nodded, not knowing where to look. Thankfully, it was happening, but it wouldn’t be a bad idea if it were over soon. You gulped, returning your attention to Nami in a silent request for her to continue. It was awkward, of course, because you were dragging Robin and Nami into a situation that wasn’t theirs, even if they were the ones to offer to help, in the first place. Sanji could be being bothered in unimaginable ways and then start hating you, you never knew.

“Well, I’m heading to bed. I don’t think it’s my business to interfere!” Nami said simply, waving a hand as she walked past you to leave the place, followed by Robin, who wished you a good night before she could leave.

A shiver ran down your spine and you felt reality finally crash over you at the moment their footsteps faded in the distance and Sanji sniffled again. You shook your head, scratching the back of your neck. “Um, look, I—”

“I’m so sorry, (y/n)-san!” Suddenly, he was on his knees right in front of you, frantically bowing. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t ever mean to make you feel this way! Truth is I actually like you a lot! I’m so sorry, (y/n)-san!” He cried out with that traditional drama of his that you’d always seen, but never directed towards you.

“You... like me?” You furrowed your eyebrows, confusion only growing when Sanji froze on his tracks and moved to sit back on his legs, with his hands clasped together over his chest.

“I—I, um, yes!” Sanji had his cheeks red; hell, that was something new since he wasn’t even drunk. How much did Nami scold him for him to be reduced to pieces like this? It was even funny. “I just don’t know what to... I felt like flirting with you all the same as the others wouldn’t work, it needed to be special, but I also didn’t know how else to approach you, I was just waiting for the right moment—” The whole blabbering had you questioning if he would die talking so much without taking a single breath, but then something clicked in your mind. Approaching you had to be...

“Special?” You questioned as you crouched down in front of him, and the new proximity had Sanji covering his face with his hands.

“Sorry for not being good enough and for my unrequited feelings! I never wanted to bother you, (y/n)-san!”

Unrequited feelings. You wanted to laugh, though you held it back because of the uncertainty regarding how he would react to it, so you instead just pressed your lips together into a smile as you looked at him. Sanji was about to bow again when you held onto his shoulder.

“I...” You sighed, gaze falling to the ground. “I wouldn’t call it unrequired.” An awkward chuckle escaped your lips, fading away into silence. Did you do something wrong? Aw, fuck. When you looked at Sanji again, his face burned bright red as blood flowed from his nose again. “Sanjiii!” You cried, shaking his shoulders to knock life back into him, and finally stopped when his hands wrapped around your wrists.

“You like me back, (y/n)-san?” And Sanji started blabbering again, this time soon falling silent with a soft cry muffled into the palms of his hands. Even though you couldn’t see his face, his ears were bright red. Who knew? Sanji actually liked you, and instead of being bold and flirty like he usually was with the people he was infatuated with, he got all shy instead.

Holding back another chuckle was impossible, letting your lips curl into a smirk as you poked his hand. “Ohh, so that’s why you get all shy around me? That’s why you avoid me? Because you don’t know what to do, afraid I won’t like you?” Whatever he said in response fell incoherent against his hands. “Hell, and me here thinking that you didn’t like me! Who knew I could’ve gotten the boy I wanted much earlier?” The words you chose had the exact effect you expected, flustering Sanji even more, though you didn’t imagine him to be quiet with it, whining about something you didn’t understand, once more. “Aw, Sanji!” Something in your chest shifted with the way he knelt there all small.

Sanji’s shoulders shrunk a little with the way you reached out to run your fingers through his hair, almost curling up into a ball right there when you pressed a kiss to his head.

“C’mon, can I see your face?” Your finger ran up and down the back of his hand, tracing a protruding vein before circling his knuckle. Gulping, Sanji shook his head. “Aw!” You pouted. “How am I supposed to kiss you, then? Not that I will be mad if you don’t want it to happen now, but it would be nice.”

His fingers twitched a little, and Sanji parted his fingers a little to look at you—you tilted your head with a smile in response. It was slow, but he did uncover his face, still never looking you in the eyes. Damn, and think that, among so many people, you were the one who could reduce him to such a state. His hands rested over his thighs, clenched into fists.

“There’s no need to be nervous,” you mumbled and cupped his cheek, leaning in. At first, it was only a brush of your nose against Sanji’s, experimentally—as light as the touch was, he still flinched and leaned back. Okay, maybe you were rushing... or not. He immediately leaned into your hand again, although closing his eyes.

“Sorry,” he whispered.

“No, no, it’s fine.” You let your thumb run over his cheekbone. “I can just—” He shook his head again, so you interrupted yourself.

“Please...?” Sanji opened his eyes a little, letting his hand rest over yours.

Before you could start to overthink things, you just leaned in to finally press your lips to his. It was awkward at first, out of synchrony, slowly growing into something softer. His lips were a little cracked, letting you control the kiss then seeking yours when you threatened to pull away, so you deepened the kiss; he sighed softly. You only pulled away when the air wasn’t enough and let Sanji rest his head against your shoulder.

Only the sound of your breathing along with the water’s broke through the silence. A feeling tingled in your chest, making you feel nice all over; you couldn’t help but hug Sanji close, nuzzling his shoulder softly. A long sigh escaped your nose when you fell to reality again, noticing how your knees started to ache against the wooden floor.

“Hey, it’s late.” You patted his back. “How about we go to bed? Make sure to sleep well so we can enjoy the day tomorrow, okay?”

.𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟.

#one piece #sanji vinsmoke #sanji #x reader #x male reader #x female reader #gender neutral #fan fic #fan fiction #oneshot #imagine #monkey d luffy #roronoa zoro #tony tony chopper #sanji x reader

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