Tumpik
#bts x you
archivedkookie · 5 hours ago
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[TEASER] tolerate it — KTH [m]
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tolerate it | ceo!taehyung x f.reader ˚₊✩
⟶ GENRE : heavy angst, one-sided love, forced marriage, infidelity(kinda? idk their marriage was forced lol), smut 
⟶ RATING : 18+
⟶ TEASER WC : 2.1k [ whole fic will have an estimate of 15k....but it can go beyond that... ]
⟶ SUMMARY : Taehyung is your husband, and you love him. If only he loved you back; if only he cherished your love and not tolerated it.
⟶ WARNINGS : A N G S T, sadness, heartbreak, one-sided love, taehyung is an asshole, husband!taehyung, author cried writing this teaser and fic (whoo-hoo), your super duper fun archivedkookie angst!!
⟶ NOTE : there are many angst especially cheating au requests, on my inbox….you guys love suffering, don’t you? LMAO, that’s okay, cus me too!! This one is a bit different, because it’s a forced marriage au…..bye this was supposed to be a drabble for my drabble game but here we are, turning this into a whole one shot maybe even a fic….. why do i keep doing this to myself 😭 ugh, anyways…..this will come out once i’m done with chapter 8 of my fic as we were, or after i finish that whole fic as a whole......it really depends.
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MASTERLIST ₊˚✧ TAGLIST ₊˚✧
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“I’ll be back by eight.” He says, but you know he won’t be, just like every other night.
You’re used to it. You know that he doesn’t love you, that your parents forced your marriage to bring the Kim and Song companies together. Then, why does it hurt you so much if your wedding was forced? As if you’re getting stabbed right in the heart if everything is just pretend?
That’s simple—because you love Kim Taehyung.
You and he grew up together; your parents were best friends, and your marriage was agreed on when you were only a baby, still crawling and drinking your mother’s milk.
And falling for Taehyung was a given; you’ve been in love with him since you were mere children, the love you had for him gradually morphing into something with such intensity that only thinking about him is enough for your heart to implode.
Taehyung was never hostile towards you, he was a sweet boy to you, and you were even best friends at some point in life, but that all changed the day he knew he had no escape and that he would have to marry you no matter how much he protested.
Taehyung thought he could get out of the marriage, that he could convince his parents when he was an adult, this is the twenty-first century, after all, and forced marriages were something way out of date. So, he was never cold towards you, always being kind and loving to you, making you mistake his strictly platonic actions inside his mind as love inside yours.
But then Taehyung’s world came crashing down at the age of twenty-five when he learned that he had to marry you, that he had absolutely no choice, and that there was no changing his parent’s mind.
He could have learned to love you; you weren’t a woman that was hard to love—but he couldn’t because he was already in love with his girlfriend, Yunji, whom he was planning on asking to marry days after it was announced to him that he would have to marry you.
You’ve seen her at your wedding, and you saw the prolonged eye contact they held while you were saying your vows, you saw the look that screamed ‘I love you and I’m sorry’, and you would be lying if you said it didn’t hurt like anything you’d ever experienced before.
But what you didn’t know was that you were in for far worse.
After the day of your wedding, Taehyung was never the same; throwing all his anger towards the situation on you, and you endured, not only because of your love for him, but because you know there’s no getting out of this marriage, and making yourself even more miserable would be a waste of time.
And it’s become a routine for you, waiting for your husband to come home while he’s spending the night with the woman he truly loves and wants to be with, someone who isn’t you.
You hate yourself, you hate that you’re just a barrier in his eyes, keeping him and his love from being together, and you hate that even after everything he’s put you through, you still love him as if he’s the same man from years ago.
It’s already been a year, and you’re honestly tired of it all; you’re exhausted to the point where you’ve become physically drained.
You’re tired of being belittled by your own husband, your insecurities being created inside your head from the comments he throws at you, your mind managing to take it to heart to the point where you started to believe him.
You never thought you weren’t pretty enough before him. “God.” Taehyung would snarl quietly, almost rolling his eyes, but you heart everything, creating scars that were never there before.
You never thought you weren’t enough before his words. “I’ll never love you; this marriage is nothing to me.” He had said countless times, always wanting to remind you how this marriage wasn’t something out of love.
Taehyung tore your innocence apart, filling you with dark thoughts about yourself to the point where looking in the mirror made you want to vomit. You never thought you would reach this point, that your fantasy inside your mind about marrying your love could turn out like this—and it crushes you even more that it will never change; Taehyung will never love you back.
You deserve someone to love you back, someone who makes you feel on top of the world; you deserve a happy marriage with someone who isn’t Taehyung.
It shreds your heart into pieces that you’re not the one for him and that it’ll never be you and him in the end—but you can’t force him to love you, and now, after a year of an unhappy marriage and constant debates with yourself, you’ve come to accept it.
Taehyung isn’t the one for you, and he never will be.
“Taehyung.” You call him, your voice stern and your nose sniffling slightly from your crying session a few minutes before.
He turns around, his expression cold as always, not even surprised to see you awake at such a late hour. Taehyung doesn’t care; he doesn’t even try to hide that he reeks of another woman.
“We need to talk.” You say with a soft voice, crossing your arms against your chest while looking down to the ground, avoiding looking at his face at all costs because if you do, your brain just might reconsider everything you’ve been planning, sabotaging itself to suffer even more.
“I can’t do this anymore.” You sigh, a weight coming off your back when you finally say it; after one whole year of suffering in silence, you finally get it out. It feels like a relief, but it soon falters when a low chuckle comes from Taehyung’s lips.
You’ve missed his chuckle, his slight smile; even if it may be sarcastic, you missed it so much that you forgot what it was like to have him smile in front of you. You came to know only his scowls and dark gaze, and the memories of the sweet guy you once knew faded, replacing them with an image of him that makes chills course through your body.
“What can’t you do, ____?” Taehyung asks, his voice deeper, his eyes staring holes into your body, making you squirm uncomfortably. You clear your throat and swallow the lump inside your throat; you need to do this; you need to assert yourself with your husband—you can’t keep getting hurt, you can’t keep putting yourself second for a marriage that was never real in the first place.
“I can’t do this anymore, Taehyung.” You point to yourself and him, your heart squeezing so much that a slight pain grows all over your chest. And Taehyung sighs; he knows what you’re talking about; he doesn’t need you to expressly point it out for him to know that you’re talking about his late nights and your marriage.
Taehyung snickers, another low, dark chuckle leaving his mouth. You furrow your eyebrows; is your marriage, your feelings funny to him? Here you are, finally pouring your feelings to him, and he has the audacity to laugh?
“And you think I want to do this, ____?” Taehyung stops laughing, his eyes finding yours, and shivers trail through your spine when he looks at you again, pure hatred towards you, scarring your heart and unwanted tears starting to well inside your eyes.
“I’ve wanted nothing more than to divorce you, God knows I do, but there’s no getting out of this marriage, ____.” Taehyung hisses your name in repulsion, the tone of his voice shredding your hearts into pieces, pieces that weren’t even supposed to be made.
Is it too much to ask for him to love you back? For your marriage to work? For you to finally be happy with someone by your side?
“Fine, b-but is it too much to ask for you to at least….Collaborate? You’re not the only one that was forced into this, okay?” You sigh, looking to the ground, still feeling your husband’s eyes on your body. You try your hardest not to let the tears fall, to not look weak in front of him, but as always, you fail, and a single tear manages to escape your eyes into the skin of your cheeks.
Taehyung rolls his eyes at your words, “Why? No one’s stopping you from finding another man, ____. You know I don’t care; you can go ahead and find another guy.”
Once again, his words shred your heart; does he not care about you at all? Fine, he may not love you, but do you mean so little to him that he throws you away as if you’re a nuisance, mere garbage in his eyes?
It’s not painful because you’re his wife, but because before all this happened, you were his friend.
“I can’t.” You whisper, your voice breaking at the end of your sentence, and Taehyung can't help but scoff.
“Why can’t you, hm?” Taehyung squints his eyes, followed by an annoyed click of his tongue. He’s already frustrated, and he truly doesn’t want to deal with you, out of all people, and the annoyance you bring him.
“Are you so pathetic that you can’t find a man to love you?” He hisses, and you blink, your head trying to grasp his words.
Maybe Taehyung is being a bit harsh with his words toward you. Still, he doesn’t think, not this night anyway; with so many things inside his head, Taehyung doesn’t have time to register his thoughts before speaking them—especially when looking at you, he sees that it’s all your fault that he can never be happy with the woman he loves.
Taehyung doesn’t get it; he can’t understand why you’re being so annoying about it so suddenly. It never bothered you before; for a whole year, you’ve never complained about the late outings and the smell he always had of another woman’s bed, so why now? Out of all the nights, why did you have to annoy him on the same night his girlfriend broke up with him because of you?
Taehyung’s words repeat in your head like a broken record, and every time you hear it, his harsh and angry voice, your chest pains even more, and your heart creates scars in itself, continuous blood of sadness splattering all over.
This is what you’re tired of, the constant belittling and feeling useless, and of course, the feeling inside thinking about his words, believing that he is right.
All your twenty-four years of life, you’ve never received pure love from another; you’ve never had enough of a man to call him yours because, in the end, your heart always belonged to another, and the person is none other than the man right before you, Kim Taehyung.
“Do you really want to know?” You ask, your voice breathy, on the verge of stammering as another tear falls from your eyes.
“Yes, why is it, ____?” Taehyung asks, almost laughing, and you take a deep breath, your heart thumping on your ear and your stomach twisting on itself. You don’t think, all your blood rushes through your head, and you let out what you never thought you would.
“Because I fucking love you, Taehyung.”
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aamalaaa · 2 days ago
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The Party And The Broom
| idol jungkook! x reader
| genre: romance, fluff, humour
| word count: 868
| a/n: a feel good, improbable scenario drabble born from an hilarious game of MASH, enjoy!
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As you step outside of the elevator and onto the last floor of the HYBE building, you can’t help but wonder why you’re here. Over and over again. No cause why, how are you here?
You’re not working, as you usually do when you’re in this building (being a janitor and all), and you definitely feel like an impostor.
You feel a hand on your lower back, encouraging you to move, as you were very much standing still, eyes wide and heart racing like you’d just sprinted in the Olympics or something. Except you didn’t, you’re just a janitor, who’s very much smitten with the guy standing to your right, shooting you a dazzling bunny smile. Which is why you were here in the first place, J-Hope’s Jack In The Box pre-release party. As Jungkook’s date.
You have to force yourself really hard not to run back to the elevator and go home. This is embarrassing, cause who the fxck do you think you are?
“You okay?” a sweet, concerned voice asks you. You just stare into his big doe eyes. He looks a bit nervous. You probably look absolutely terrified, no wonder.
“It’ll be okay, I’m here alright?” He smiles.
“Let me introduce you to everyone”
Oh now you are SWEATING and you’re very thankful you didn’t forget to apply deodorant before you came here because, that would be your last straw. He tugs you by your waist and beckons you toward a group of guys who are laughing and chatting vigorously. Of course, you already know them, it’s his bandmates, the BTS boys. Yeah no, you can’t do this.
You stop in your track, and the beautiful black haired man stops and looks at you.
“Do you want us to go?” He brings a hand to his hair to try and comb it. He looks nervous. This is your fault, you never should’ve agreed. He stutters a bit “I-I.. I’m so sorry y/n I should’ve stopped to think about how you felt coming here.. I’m sorry..”
You bring a hand to his cheek, caressing the soft skin. “It’s ok, I agreed Kookie. You couldn’t have known..” You stare into his eyes and smile warmly, trying real hard to show him you’re not mad. He leans into your touch, like a cute little bunny. You swoon, you’re down so bad.
“Wanna go eat something? We can grab a drink and si-“ A voice you recognize cuts him off. You step away from your date.
“Hey y/n! I didn’t know you were working tonight, it’s good to see you!” It’s one of the events organizer, you’ve talked to him a few times while you were on lunch breaks, he’s nice.
“I’m glad i caught you, someone broke a glass and I’m kinda busy right now, could you go and clean it up?” He places a broom in your hand while you stare at him, motionless. “Thanks!” He goes off somewhere else, leaving you in shock.
Jungkook stares at the man, and then shifts his gaze to you.
“What the fxck” Is all he manages to say, while you stand there looking like a complete idiot. You both stand there, dumbfounded. I mean what did you both expect, you’re a janitor in this building, for fxck’s sake.
You see the Bangtan boys coming your way, and if a hole appeared beneath you right this instant, you would be immensely thankful. Hell you might start digging it right now, fxck wishful thinking.
“JAYKAYYYYY” You hear a high pitched voice saying, shaking you back to planet earth. You really wish you were a hallucination right about now.
The boys start swarming Jungkook while you stand there like a fxcking inanimate object, broom still in your hand. Why couldn’t you be a rock, life would have been easier. You sigh.
They all turn to look at you and you think your soul might’ve left your body.
Hoseok is the first to speak.
“Hey y/n right? I’m glad you’re here, you’re working tonight?” He smiles, a bit confused.
Your mouth is agape, like a fish, a really awkward looking fish. Why. Can’t. You. Talk.
“Yeah so about that… I told you guys I was um, bringing a date right..” Jungkook says, rubbing the back of his neck. He gets closer and puts a hand on your waist. “Yeah, that’s y/n, my date”
You couldn’t be more rigid even if you wanted to, you might change into a stone statue, nothing is out of the question.
They all stare at you, very confused, and Namjoon’s gaze shift to the broom in your hand.
“Cool, why are you holding a broom then?…”
“I- uh…. someone thought I was working tonight, um..” Your cheeks heat up so much you feel light headed.
The man eyes you, and shoots a sympathetic look your way. He takes the broom from your hand and gives it to a worker who was passing by. “Let’s get you a drink yeah?”
His smile is radiant, dimples on full display. Jungkook gazes at you, eyes big and hopeful.
You finally manage to talk, somewhat normally.
“Alright yeah, let’s do that”
Jungkook beams at you, bunny teeth showing. And that smile, that wonderful smile. It makes its all worth it.
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kookieswan · a day ago
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Red Light (Snippet) - Pudding
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Nightmare!Hoseok x Psychologist!Reader
Word Count: 600+
Genre: Horror AU, Monster AU, Psychological horror, Fluffy.
Warnings: Talk of killing/injuring people. It should be noted that this story will contain themes of horror/psychological horror and also explore obsessive behaviors and codependency. Many characters are morally gray. Please be warned!
Summary: Seokjin has always been confusing to Yoongi, but he swore he’d never see the man happy over food of all things.
Notes: Just a cute little something featuring our favorite Nightmares! Also please remember, Nightmares don’t need to eat to survive, so many don’t consume food regularly.
This is a snippet from the Red Light series. Find the Masterlist here ♥️
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“Alright, I think everything’s situated. Enjoy your treat Yoon, I’ll probably talk to you later.” Just seeing Jungkook’s cute face scrunch up is into a grin enough to make Yoongi giggle as he nods, clutching his new edible treasure tightly. His Jungkookie had hand delivered the bowls himself, a gift from a higher power… Quite literally.
“Have a good day Jungkookie. If anyone bothers you, don’t hesitate to tell me and I’ll rip them apart.” The guard rolls his eyes but still gives him a small smile before turning to unlock the door to the secured room. He opens it and slips out quickly, the sound of it shutting causing Seokjin to stir. It’s about time he wakes up anyway, Yoongi thinks. Jin’s been sleeping much too often and he’s starting to get bored with the lack of artistic freedom.
The younger Nightmare watches as Seokjin slowly awakens, curled up in the corner of his bed with the bowl hugged to his chest still. The other Nightmare sits up from his small bed sluggishly, yawing with flourish. Yoongi blinks at the older man, raising a brow when Jin frowns and huffs, bones cracking as he stands. A bad sleep apparently, but then again, they never rest well.
“What’s for dinner?” Jin juts his chin out toward the bowl in Yoongi’s hands when he notices is, eyes curious since Yoongi’s actually eating. The smaller Nightmare raises up the bowl he holds closely, the abnormally large spoon sticking out as he does. The choice of food was odd, very odd, but Yoongi’s never been one to question things outside of the norm.
“Pudding.” Seokjin walks over the the small opening in the cell where his food sits quickly, grabbing it with careful hands. He brings the smallest of bites up to his lips, allowing the delicately to touch his tongue. As far as Yoongi knows, Jin hasn’t ate but maybe once or twice, avoiding the countless years of disgusting slop.
“Pudding…? It’s so sweet…” Seokjin stares down at the bowl, lips pursed in thought as he tastes the food. He grips the spoon tightly and stirs the dessert, blinking down at it with squinted eyes. Yoongi shovels another heaping spoonful into his mouth, savoring the sweet taste, a huge difference from their usual dinners. He speaks with his mouth full, pudding covering his sharp teeth.
“Chocolate pudding. Apparently our favorite psychologist requested it and was very adamant about the whole thing. Nearly got into a brawl.” As always, Jungkookie was able to give him some insight, the precious bunny man. It makes Yoongi hum brightly, eyes sparkling as he reminisces. His humming falters as he catches Seokjin’s face, perplexed for a moment by the full blown grin that adorns his lips.
Seokjin hasn’t ever been one for sweets, or for food in general. He’s never even mentioned wanting to to eat, so the action is out of the box… Yoongi almost questions Jin when the Nightmare brings another spoonful up to his lips, a bubble of laughter leaving him as if it’s the most amazing thing in the world. Seokjin gives him a pleased look, eyes bright as he mumbled out one word;
“Joonie.” And then it hits him. Seokjin doesn’t like sweets, but Namjoon does; loves them even. At least, he used to before things went downhill. Yoongi watches with hidden content as the other Nightmare practically dances around the room, his previous sour mood long gone.
“Mmhhh, happy happy Joonie… I think I owe Dr. _____ a favor.”
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kofisips · 6 hours ago
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Teaser: Paper Hearts | KNJ
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Rating: General Pairings: Namjoon x Reader, ft. Hoseok Genre: co-working idiots to lovers, fluff, humor
Summary: When Hoseok has grown tired of silently watching the two dense idiots who can’t flirt for shit, he takes matters into his own hands. Good thing there’s a nook on the internet that anyone can upload their writing under an alias. Thinking that none of his friends will ever read it, he named his characters Namjoon and Y/N. ( kofisips masterlist )
Release Date: October 6 / October 7
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read: reply to this post or send an ask to be included in the taglist :)
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Before being a full-time songwriter, Hoseok used to do creative writing work for fun.
As a teen, he used to write alternate stories about the movies that awed him, sometimes even books he enjoyed reading. In his spare time, just to stay in touch with his hobbies, he revisits his old writeit.com account and reads all his all-time favorite bookmarked stories; and today was one of those days.
Scrolling through the updated website’s interface, his eyes widened at the new features, “Oh, cool! They’re posting original novels now.”
He clicked on the first story that was suggested, an idea suddenly entered – If he can’t make the both of you realize it, he’ll just give you the ending you deserve through writing. It seemed like a good idea, perfect even. However, he struggled to think of what kind of genre fit the story he had in mind.
Slice of life is a huge giveaway, given that this is already real life. Making it angst is like going through the hell of his failed plans all over again. He passed through a list of genres the website had categorized in alphabetical order until he finally found something that he thinks is exciting to write.
“Enemies to lovers? Spy versus Kingpin? Sounds pretty interesting,” he smirked.
It’s funny how he had quickly outlined the story within minutes instead of working on Jungkook’s songs. He even went to the extent of studying other writers’ formats – taking notes on how they listed their warnings, ratings, and genre. He noticed how people did their stories differently now compared to the stories he had read before. Regardless, he had the time of his life plotting the story under the tips of his fingers.
After he had finally set out his ideas, he froze as soon as he got to the part where he had to think of his characters’ names. He watched the text cursor blink for a while. With brows furrowed, he debated whether or not to use any name that had a nice ring or just go with your real names; until he settled with the latter.
“It’s not like they’ll find it,” he snickered as he typed ‘Namjoon’ and ‘Y/N.’
His rekindled relationship with his old hobby kept him preoccupied. The sound of his keyboard keys clicking aired through the room; as he read the story aloud in between his typing, “At the age…of twenty five? Or eight? Yeah, Eight’s better. Twenty-eight…Park Namjoon…became the CEO…of Park…Intellect…Security Agency – there, perfect!”
After 3 weeks of continuously going through the first chapter of his series, he called ‘Over Those Hills,’ Hoseok cracked his knuckles with a shit-eating grin that reached up to his eyes. The mouse’s cursor hovered over the ‘Post’ button, and with a deep breath that he held in for a while, he finally clicked it with one eye closed.
It was purely made for fun at first but the next thing he knew, he had garnered 500k reads in less than a month of posting the first chapter. His readers’ comments flooded his notifications, begging for him to post the next chapter.
He originally intended to write only whenever he felt like it, but since he got himself a huge readership and following, he decided to continue with it as regularly as he could.
Over Those Hills by wordsofhope Summary: Namjoon was given a chance to leap through every time loop just to be with Y/N. The catch? No matter how many lifetimes he has gone through, they always meet under ugly circumstances. Rating: Mature? idk. Genre: parallel universe, idiots to lovers (why can’t they just date already?) A/N: Hey guys! I can’t believe that this series got 500k reads! Thank you so much ㅠㅠ Stay tuned of what happens next to Namjoon and Y/N’s story, okay?
Everything was going well for his writing career except for one thing: ever since he started writing about you and Namjoon, he can’t look at the both of you straight anymore.
He became more shifty and always in a panic.
It only grew even more when he opened up commissions on some chapters when one of the requests he would frequently get is to write a smut.
“I don’t wanna sexualize them like that,” he frowned, knowing that he wasn’t even sure if he could write one when it was a fluff-centric story.
Other than that, he doesn’t even know what smut means – he only knows ‘mature’ for a rating because that was one of the five tags the website only had years ago. Heck, he didn't even know the site grew so much that they put up various tags and warnings he's only finding out at his big age.
But there is only one person he could ask what smut is. Comfortably and with no judgment...he hopes. Someone who is a voracious reader and well-versed with terminology.
And that is no other than Kim Namjoon himself.
‘Am I really asking him something about his story?’ he thought.
If Hoseok’s life was written fiction, this would have to be his story’s conflict.
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taegularities · 4 months ago
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not my fault | jjk (m)
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Summary: After sparking a sinful conversation on a dating app, you vow to yourself that you won’t give in to more the notorious college fuckboy Jeon Jungkook might have to offer. That is, until he rings your doorbell just one night later – and it’s truly not your fault that he’s so damn hard to resist.
➵ pairing: Jungkook x female reader ➵ rating: 18+ ➵ genre: classmates to lovers, college!au; fluff, smut ➵ warnings: sexual tension, flirting/teasing/provoking, banter, a dating app :’), she has a crush on him but won’t admit it, grumpy roommate joon, crack dialogue, fuckboy!jk who wears glasses in class, idk that much about pharmacy i apologise; explicit sexual content: sexting, he makes her horny in public, petnames !!, fingering, edging, oral (f. & m. rec.), dom and big cawk jk wbk, he’s SO cocky, spanks (ass & clit ones), some choking, praising, messy but protected sex, she swallows his load <3, jk rlly loves her ass <3 ➵ word count: 12.6k ➵ a/n: been itching to write a lighthearted college au for so long and here we gooo !! @missgeniality​​​​​​​ thank you for enduring me and making this better and for not k*lling me yet, love thou, kitty <33 enjoy y’all – feedback is always appreciated !! <3
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MASTERLIST | WIPS
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“What’s with the constant yelling on this goddamn campus?”
Namjoon is not a friend of noise and crowds – as a self-declared claustrophobic, the cheers around him sound eerie and mind-numbing, and for once, you can’t blame him. Because every usually silent corner of your university is exploding, and you’re sure a few windows are already cracking at the shrill blow of the constant screams.
“What’s with you?” you ask back, nudging his elbow playfully as you clutch the strap of your bag tighter.
You want to make him laugh, but your friend is as gloomy as ever, not quite ready – or awake – to give into your jokes just yet. You figure he might be once he gets ready for bed.
“Those cheerleaders,” he points to the group of girls, and you think his voice, calm and low on other days, is close to breaking. It’s hilarious – it reminds you of his adolescent days. “They sound like this creepy sorority video on YouTube. Make it stop.”
You shudder, because you know exactly what he’s talking about. If he hadn’t shown it to you on a dark, quiet Halloween night right after watching Sinister and It, it might not be engraved in your mind like some daunting, unsolved supernatural mystery.
Pouting, you stare to the ground, tucking back your hair. “We should’ve watched Buzzfeed Unsolved instead.”
The campus has been extra noisy these days – because not only is the semester coming to its end, but your nerves have been buzzing due to the approaching exam season, too. On top of that, the college is finally bidding farewell to its local sweethearts as if a group of renowned scientists is letting go of its strongest pioneer.
You guess Taehyung, Jimin and Hoseok were somewhat trailblazing after all – athletic, attractive, top of their classes and the talk of the school for literal years.
But with them leaving, the attention is shifting; and with the already continuous excitement, there’s one other hot topic left – a thriving fuckboy who shares quite a few classes with you and will still be here next semester. Very likely to corrupt innocent girls’ minds; to charm someone new at the very next frat party he might crash.
And he’ll do it next semester, too. And the one after.
A piece of advice – pharmacy really isn’t the major for you if you opt to finish in the required or recommended time. Seems like Jeon Jungkook’s existence will still roam the campus like a plague, make you roll your eyes back into your head for a while longer.
You don’t care about such things, you always say. You’d much rather focus on your education.
Right when your thoughts begin drifting off, a girl walks past Namjoon and screams into the warm summer air, and her voice still rings in your ears when you hear him complain, “Jeez, what the actual fuck.”
“A few more steps and we’re off campus grounds.”
“A few more steps and we’ll enter an apartment with my books scattered around.”
You shrug and sigh, admonishing him, “Hey, I told you to start with your shit on time.”
Namjoon stares at you as if he’s attempting to annihilate you with his gaze, shooting invisible lasers at you before he mocks, “If I had a hot girl I’m crushing on cheering for me in class, I’d be just as motivated as you are.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you state, your demeanour calm and clueless, your shoulders shrugging so often they might get stuck in place.
“I’m talking about the grand nerd slash fuckboy extraordinaire who–”
“He’s really not that great.”
“He’s fucking top of his year… will get awards and honours. It’s the college equivalent of a valedictorian.”
Your steps slow down, and you slide your hands into the pockets of your jumpsuit, squinting at the polished car that reflects the sun as you breathe, “Speaking of the devil.”
In a far corner, you watch Jungkook stand near the road with the door of his vehicle open, presumably letting out the hot suffocating air that has collected inside. He’s talking to some girl who’s pushing herself uncomfortably close to him, but he doesn’t seem to mind. Because in the next moment, he’s smirking back, tilting his head before she gets into the passenger’s seat.
“What you staring at?” Namjoon questions before he follows your gaze, coming to a halt when you do.
“Missing dick.”
He laughs and shakes his head, kicking the grass underneath his feet before he utters, “Here we go again.”
“What?” Jungkook’s car drives into the sunset, very 90s movie style, the delicate, grinning heroine next to him laughing, and you turn to Namjoon to stare at him. “Do you know how long I’ve been under this dry spell? I–” you wave your hand in dramatic motions, cocking an eyebrow, “I feel my virginity growing back.”
“You know what I’m gonna suggest.”
“Kim Namjoon.”
“Listen,” he exclaims, a full-lipped mouth falling open, “dating apps exist for a reason. If you won’t do it, I will.”
“I…” Perplexed, you wait, closing your eyes for an exhausted moment before you sigh and nod. “Sure.”
But in all honesty – perhaps you’d rather embrace your regrowing virginity instead of giving in to the last resort that are dating apps.
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The nightly wildlife chirps even in this part of the city – you for one are happy to be connected to nature somehow, even if it means to open your window to mosquitos every other night.
You think the clock might strike eleven soon, but you don’t give it much of a thought as you stroll along the streets, your mind still fogged from grinding for your exams. The summer breeze feels nice – clears your head a bit.
Thumbs hooked in the pockets of your shorts, you take a deep breath, peeking at the stars for a brief moment before you hear the sound of music crawl closer. You think you recognise the song as an early Lindsey Stirling track. You’re sure the neighbourhood appreciates being woken up by the rhythmic melody of dubstep and violins.
A car pulls up next to you and comes to a stop, and the driver turns the music down before leaning in and revealing himself as the popular wonderkid par excellence.
“What are you doing out here so late and alone, love?”
The nickname makes your insides palpitate, and you think his voice elicits goosebumps where it shouldn’t. You attempt your best to keep your cool, brushing your tresses out of your face before you question back, “What are you doing here?”
“I, uh, live nearby?”
“And you’re alone, too?” you add, your eyes darting to the backseat and back to him. “Didn’t you pick someone up just this afternoon?”
He flashes a poised smirk at you, his eyes crinkled and full of mischief as he chants, “Oh, you noticed that?”
You shrug your shoulders, balancing your weight from one leg to the other when he asks, “Done with homework and studying?”
“Yes, boss,” you answer, stepping closer to the edge of the pavement, “internalised every bit of information related to quality control and whatnot.”
“Want me to give you a lift?”
“I literally live in that block over there, Jungkook,” you clarify, pointing to the complex three streets away, and the movement of his head follows your finger.
But he doesn’t cave in just yet, calloused fingertips tapping at the steering wheel as he suggests, “Let me drive you around a bit then.”
“What if you kidnap me?”
“Well, first of all, you’ve known me for years, and second, you’re not a kid anymore. It’d just be napping, and you’d be crazy not to want that.”
You wish you didn’t laugh at his lame joke. Now, you suddenly don’t understand how his other chicks fall for his humour this fast, because he’s obviously out of juice, and won’t be able to swoon you.
…Into falling for him.
But luring you into his car? Sure.
“Fine,” you say, puffing out a breath before you get in.
He glances at the street, checking for intruding traffic before he drives off and you ask, “What are you doing so late?”
“Just went for a drive. It’s a pleasant night.”
You press onto the button next to you to let the window shift down further, basking in the gust of the gentle night. You can taste the summer from where you sit, delicate and flowery, and you let a soft smile play around your lips before you inquire, “Why don’t you go for a walk instead? To save Mother Earth and prevent global warming and stuff.”
“I do usually go for walks,” Jungkook defends, swaying slightly to the song that you recognise yet again. “Just missed her.”
“Her?”
“Mirage. My car.”
Of course he’d name his car.
You sigh. Maybe you’re overgeneralising; putting him in a drawer filled with files of every playful fuckboy and frat boy in existence. But Jungkook does seem nice – he’s always been nice. And he’s not a frat boy either.
You sit up in your seat, smiling at him before you point at the radio and tell him, “I didn’t know you were a Swiftie.”
“Oh, I am!” he notes, singing along a few words of 22 before he adds, “I actually have the tape version of Red! It’s somewhere… in the cracks of the backseats, though, lemme…”
“Oh, you really don’t need to–”
But before you can argue some more, he’s pulled into a parking lot swiftly and stepped out of his car. He re-emerges in the backseat of Mirage, sifts through the slits with a grimace that suggests he’s touched something he didn’t want to, and then cheers, “Found it!”
With a sigh, you grab the vintage cassette and follow his instructions as to what to press or not, and when one of Taylor’s songs chimes, you leave the car, stretching your muscles and then opening the door to the backseat.
You make yourself comfortable next to him, immediately bobbing your head in unison with his and the song’s rhythm before you realise how close you two are. In hindsight, you don’t understand why you came to sit here at all – he would’ve come back to the driver’s seat anyway.
The whole encounter doesn’t make much sense, but you guess it’s too late to overthink now – so you begin a conversation about your favourite songs on the album instead, and you act as if you don’t realise that he’s side-eyeing you. Squinting in amusement.
And before you can blink twice, he’s shifted closer with a hand on your thigh, giggling. You let him obliviously, licking your lips, and when both of you go quiet and let silence between you settle, you swallow thickly – there’s a clump in your throat and it’s not dissolving.
Out of nowhere, he looks down at your grey clothing, the series of happenings lacking logic once more as he comments, “Nice shorts.”
You steady your breathing with anticipation jabbing your overworking mind, telling yourself that it’s okay, that there’s no need to be nervous. And so, you wet your lips, telling him, “Glad you like them.”
“I do like quite a few things about you…”
“Oh? What’s that?”
Jungkook hums in thought, and for a moment, you’re certain he just said it to charm you. After all, he doesn’t know you all that well. He knows you’re quiet in uni. Knows you share classes with him. He knows you stuff your mouth with desserts any chance you get, because he caught you a few times and possib–
“The colour of your hair,” he finally lists, and you listen attentively, “your skin. I do like your pretty little mind, too. Got a lot in there, gotta admit.”
“The genius himself is praising a peasant like me?”
He chuckles, obviously taken aback by your choice of words. But then he catches himself, his tongue darting out to the corner of his lips before he confesses, “The genius himself has never seen a peasant this sexy, though.”
Did he really…
And is his–
Yes – his hand is definitely shifting up, your skin shivering; and he’s moving closer, his lips parted – and suddenly, the colour of your shorts has changed and your hair is in a ponytail when you were sure you were wearing it down before, and…
Okay.
Great.
You awake with a smack of your lips, blinking as you adjust to the darkness. Damn vivid dreaming. Damn Jungkook humming Taylor Swift songs in classes often enough for you to remember his taste in music.
You’re sure he would’ve taken you right there, but not before pushing you to oversensitivity and tears, nibbling at your shoulders while you squirmed in his grip.
No. That must be your interpreting imagination talking.
Fuck.
It was a dream? A long ass, detailed, elaborated one, too? His lame humour was your own?
How pathetic. When you said you needed to get laid, you really did mean it.
But instead of letting his undoubtedly monstrous, skilled cock fuck you to insanity, even if just in a dream, you find yourself between the dull walls of your room, wrapped in a cold blanket of pitch darkness.
Your blinds are shut and no beam of the streetlamps comes seeping in as you clutch your phone tight with only its light illuminating your face… and the ache between your legs is palpable. Like dream-Jungkook metaphorically blue-balled you and left you to starve.
What if you called Jimin again? It was nice with him, wasn’t it? But no – he has a girlfriend now. And the college jock Baekhyun? Would he be up to go on another date after you ditched him last time? Probably not.
Okay, and what if…
Is there really no other option left?
You reckon not.
You open your phone again and slide to the app you dreaded, one that Namjoon has been suggesting for months on end now. You won’t let the truth sidle to him – the one about you having downloaded the app ages ago, but dipping right after configuring your profile and finding no one remarkable or interesting on there.
You think their bios are crucial in what your choice settles on, but the lack of personality and terrifyingly sassy profile pictures left you shuddering and grimacing. You decided this wasn’t for you.
Now, no offence to anyone indulging in the pleasures of dating apps, but especially after tinder swindlers and alarming news, you weren’t always all that fond of the opportunities such a phenomenon brings.
But now, you do cave in, revisiting your account in a haste as you half sit up, pulling up the pillow and leaning against the creaking headboard.
For a while, you keep swiping – the most obscure descriptions catch your eye, much as expected. Just for a second, you feel your pussy clench in ache enough to swipe right to absolute idiots.
S.
Let's match and maybe I'll send you a nude on Snapchat?
Jay
got money n time so why don't we share some of it?
"Oh my fucking god," you exclaim in exasperation.
You're speechless. Other than those attempting to catch fish with flirts they most likely found on the internet, there are people who have stated nothing but their height on their profiles. Or a phrase in a different language, or, wow, "Hey there. I am using WhatsApp" on a dating app?
And then… the biggest miracle in the history of miracles happens. Crop circles and sightings of UFOs are nothing compared to it.
Because it's him. 
A mirror selfie stares back at you, his hand half buried in his pocket – but you can still see the veins popping. His hair is a mess, but he’s still so undeniably attractive; and to your misery, even his bio is harmless and basic, no nauseating cockiness.
He’s not only chasing and haunting your dreams, but appearing on this app, too. You don't consider the fact that it gives you optimal matches in your near proximity – no, for you, this is a sign of doom, of certain and ulterior conspiracy.
You take a deep breath and curl your fingers into a tight fist, and with closed eyes and a clenched jaw, you do something utterly reckless and stupid. You might regret it later… or maybe it won't affect your life at all.
But when you swipe right, you bite your tongue, and when you release your breath and open your eyes again, you're ready to watch a new name and face pop up when suddenly…
It's a match!
"NO FUCKING WAY."
You clap your hand over your mouth, the sheer volume of your voice so unexpected that you almost feel your bed rattle. A myriad of jumbled thoughts jostle for attention, and your eyes flick from one spot of your phone to the other.
Letting the device fall, you cross your legs, cracking your fingers as you try to make sense of what the hell just happened. But once the truth finally creeps in, you pull your phone closer again, holding it with your fingertips as though you just fished it out of your toilet.
You open the chat of the dating app and stare at it for a full minute, your thumbs drawing circles in the air as you bite into your lip. You’re not certain what to do with the situation – not sure what you’re doing at all; not quite able to foresee how he’ll react.
But then you collect air in your cheeks and let it out in a puff, opting for courage before typing a simple, tiny “hi?”. And then, you lock the device immediately as if Jungkook could catch you staring if you touched it any longer.
You wait ten minutes. Twenty. And when nothing comes after thirty two petrifying minutes, you place your phone on your bedside table, tugging the thinnest blanket you own over your head as if the summer isn’t in full bloom outside.
And at some point tonight, you doze off eventually.
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It’s not until the alarm clock blares and shakes you awake that memories of last night come crashing back. You think you might’ve had two damned vivid dreams, surely hoping that you didn’t truly experience the quiet, brief horror movie with you as its main cast.
But when you unlock your phone, your hope evaporates and consorts with your soul somewhere in hell, and your body falls limp against the headboard when you see… a response.
You feel the weight of his sarcasm crushing you already when you click on the chat. With a singular glance, you understand that Jungkook likes to shorten his words. Might use emojis sparsely? Definitely has the first letter of his sentences capitalised, though.
Jungkook: Hi…? R u not sure about ur greeting or
You’re not sure about anything – if you only knew, prodigy Jeon.
You: good morning.
His response comes almost immediately; as if he was waiting for you, eyes fixated on the chat, bored enough to converse with you rather than doing… whatever a Jeon Jungkook usually does.
Jungkook: Morning. U were awake late, huh?
You: couldn’t sleep. had a nightmare.
And it consisted of nothing less but his presence. His moles and soft, fluffy hair are still engraved in your mind that you somehow managed to memorise in the years you’ve known him. You wonder if he ever noticed you staring at the dark dot under his lip. Or his nose. Or at the veins of his arms… the thighs, oh god, the thighs–
The nightmare drenched your panties and shook your body until your guts were where your heart belongs.
Jungkook: Ohhhh wanna talk about it?
You gulp.
You: I’d rather not
The situation is almost comical. If you weren’t shaking in your non-existent boots, you might have laughed. But instead, you type away, cannot believe that you’re truly here, about to flirt with Jungkook like it’s a casual Thursday morning. But how could you not… he’s clearly waiting for you to bite, because…
Jungkook: Sure. So… weekend. What are u doing 2day?
He really does abbreviate the simplest words.
You: nothing. studying. you?
Jungkook: Not much either. Talking to u hopefully?
Sly, Jeon… very sly.
You: don’t you have stuff to do?
Jungkook: Yeah but… matching with a pretty girl is more fun
Is that a conversation he has every other day? Is this his tactic, his method to sing people to his form like a siren just to swallow them whole afterwards? Most importantly – if all of this is a possibility, why does your face still warm like an oven at his words?
Confidence – it’s easier through text. So you give it a shot; even if it boosts his ego – it does the same to you.
You: Jeon Jungkook thinks I’m pretty?
Jungkook: Jeon Jungkook thinks a lot of things about you
Did he not say something similar in your dream? There must be courses on witchcraft you could attend if you wanted to…
Fuck.
You hate him – but not really.
You: what does he think?
Jungkook: Well… he thinks you should text him in your DMS, bcos u have his number
Jungkook: Nd he thinks you should go out with him nd grab some lunch this noon
Just when the opportunity slithers close enough for you to graze it, something in you deflates. Like a red siren blaring warningly, reminding you that, despite your undeniable attraction to him, you don’t necessarily know if you want to involve yourself with him.
You matched with him. You texted him. You’re flirting – but what’s this uneasy feeling still? Perhaps you just realised that if you give in now, you’ll have to deal with his stolen glances and potential rumours until you graduate.
But somewhere inside, you do wish to be more to him than just a possible hook-up.
Hm.
You: I… don’t think so
Jungkook: Woah. My heart just broke like never before
You contemplate what to answer, digging deep into your thoughts to find a part that’s not overthinking and/or flooded with a hundred different personas of you. They all want something else – can’t you dip your toes in calm, still water instead of this hurricane twirling in your brain?
When you don’t answer, Jungkook double texts; two simple words but somehow still dripping in a timid tone.
Jungkook: Why not?
You: you… I don’t think you matched with me to get LUNCH
Jungkook: Ah. Why did you swipe right on me then?
Busted.
Even if his intentions were beyond fucking, genuinely attempting to take you out on a harmless, joyful date, you don’t think yours were – initially at least. And the way you know him – or as much as you do know him – you’re sure he’d jump onto this train, if you wanted to.
But something’s still holding you back… something that didn’t last night. So you answer–
You: guess I was curious to see what might happen
You: but you’re known for sleeping around. and I don’t wanna be a dick-wetter when you’ve so many people to do so… even tho you do seem nice
Jungkook: Cute. Also weird. Could’ve sworn you like me
Your heart thumps a little faster against your ribcage, and despite every word you’ve already exchanged, his newest confession turns you upside down. You’re not sure what your emotions consist of – and you wonder whether it’d be worse to have him think you like him or to actually like him.
Raising your eyebrows at the device, you admire his confidence, and despite the fright his message brought, it makes you smile a bit. It’s a rare trait – refreshing to see.
You: how would you know?
Jungkook: U swiped right, woman. Can u rlly say that u’ve never thought about me naked before?
You chuckle, an airy, goofy laugh filling the room as you pull your legs closer and tilt your head. He’s brave – you want to be, too.
You: and if I did?
Nothing comes back.
You wait for a moment. Perhaps he’s gotten up to fetch himself a drink or take a shower… it might be anything.
But then, this anything turns out to be something incredibly more intense – because suddenly, your phone is vibrating, and you almost screech, blinking at it as you ponder what to do.
You let it ring for a while, nervous to pick up – and when you think the last rings are chiming, you clear your throat and exhale, emptying your head of the thick mist before you press the green button.
You don’t get to say anything at all, because he’s already chuckling, his voice sweet and mellow before he questions, “You sure you don’t wanna grab… lunch?”
The pause sends your mind into another overthinking episode, but you brush your worries aside, suggesting instead, “Why don’t we talk about pharmacy instead? Happy drugs and blissful painkillers.”
“Coward.”
Your mouth falls open half in amusement, half in surprise, the shit eating grin growing wider when you argue defiantly, “I’m not a coward!”
“Prove it then.”
Oh… his voice fell lower; you imagine a hooded gaze, a smirk scurrying over his lips – it’s an image too dangerous for your brain. If he doesn’t stop putting it there, you might drive over, and then no one will be responsible for your misdeeds but you.
The higher deities are toying with your patience.
“I don’t need to,” you tell him, shrugging one shoulder, though he can’t see anyway. “Nice trick, though.”
“Okay, but hear me out,” he immediately says, the sounds of him shifting crackling through the speaker. Jungkook is losing his chill and you’re loving it, “What if I swiped right, because you’ve been catching my eye since we first met?”
You want to call bullshit – his voice sounds genuine and devoid of mockery and games, but you still squint your eyes, asking, “Really?”
“Yeah, you’re just. Too intimidating to ask out.”
“I’m… intimidating?”
You?
You’re scared of bugs. You dislike heights. You once screamed when Namjoon walked out of his room casually, his cheek covered in strawberry jam, because he’s too clumsy to eat properly, cleanly. He needed multiple tries and exclamations of defence to convince you that it wasn’t blood.
You can’t possibly seem intimidating to him.
“This is absolutely weird,” you admit, and when your eyes dry, you realise that you must not have blinked in minutes. The dust floating around you must be getting worried.
“I like weird.”
“You… what do you want, Jeon?”
“I…” Jungkook begins, but then silences, humming and clicking his tongue. And then, he speaks up again, suddenly shy and uncertain as he says, “If I told you what I want, you might cut the call.”
“Now I wanna know more, though.”
He sighs, and you think you can hear an odd sound accompanying his occurring hums, as if he’s tapping against a wooden object. His voice is gravelly and quieter when he speaks again, and you press your phone further against your ear.
“Alright. Sure. Nothing to lose, I guess.”
He lets you wait again. He knows how to build tension – knows how to turn you into an impatient puddle of molten composure.
“I can be sweet or,” he says, and you lean forward, “or talk you to filth. What do you want?”
To filth?
You shiver.
Albeit intrigued, you wonder – if he tried to be sweet, would he be telling you the truth? Or just try to swoon you? You don’t want to be a pawn in his game – don’t want this crush or whatever to advance. He’s a charismatic, compulsive charmer, right? What if he wraps you around his tattooed finger just for you to wonder if he meant any of it?
So you say politely, “Second option, please.”
He breathes out. He sounds a little disappointed.
“Alright. Remember when you wore that floral dress last summer and our professor told you to adhere to the dress code we don’t even have?”
“Yup. How could I forget?”
“Well. I was this close,” you imagine him bringing his forefinger and thumb close, turning his big doe eyes into slits, “to telling her off. Her Victorian morals don’t have a place in this century. Wanted to tell her that she can’t let out her lack of confidence on you. Because,” he pauses; then says, “you can do whatever the heck you wanna do.”
Wow…
This isn’t filth.
Rather, elaborated, detailed sweetness – you didn’t expect this level of observation and depth, didn’t know a simple dress and brief conversation last summer affected him enough to remember his thoughts for this long. You’re glad he can’t see, but you’re pouting, and you’re sure your eyes are glittering, the stars in your pupils flickering.
“I…”
And as sweet as he can be, his sexiness never falters. Because.
“And…”
“And.”
“You looked so fucking hot.”
Oh.
He says it hushed – almost whispers it, and you feel your sanity dematerialise and your insides burn. The little spark evolves and turns your guts and lungs to ember, and your cheeks flame up like you’ve been stuck head-first into a blazing sauna.
“...Go on,” you plead, and you nearly hear the smile in his words when he obliges.
“Been wanting to… to touch you since that day. Slide my hands across your body and pull you closer by…” He laughs, smacking his lips, hesitating before he mumbles as if he’s saying something blasphemous. “By your tits.”
Hell. What the hell.
“And goddamn, your ass, I… want it close enough to me that our bodies meld, and okay, yeah, that– that sounded weird, but–” You hear him gulp, and you swallow at the same time. “I imagined ripping that dress off of you like, not even kidding, a few dozen times? And… are you still there?”
“Yeah.”
“Too much?”
“Nah. It’s fine.”
“Is all that weird?”
“Maybe a little,” you breathe, but you must admit that you have been in the same position with him before. Imagined how it’d be if you were one of the girls he fucks. “But… guess we’re both weird.”
“Shit, you can’t say that…” Silence descends for a moment when he understands the meaning behind your words, and he clears his throat before he continues, “And right now… shit, just the thought of you sitting on your bed or couch, possibly in shorts or a nightgown drives me fucki–”
You feel your heart lurch into your throat and then fall, scrambling your insides before you confess, “I’m… in my panties. Just a shirt… and panties.”
“Oh fuck.” He waits. “Okay. Can I–”
But you never get to hear what he wants to ask, because from behind your closed door, Namjoon knocks suddenly and rapidly, startling you on the spot. You catch your phone mid-fall, breathing heavily, shaking your head when your roommate yells, “It’s your turn to make breakfast, byotch!”
You shake your head, hurrying to whisper your goodbyes to Jungkook who you briefly catch complaining, “Seriously?” – but you tell him you’re sorry, that you’ll see him tomorrow morning, because you’re class-free today.
Namjoon, however, does need to rush to uni, and you promised to make him something today before he left for his linguistics course at noon.
You spend the day munching on leftover breakfast, studying as much as your mushy thinking organ allows. But your thoughts drift back to the monstrum repeatedly that doesn’t call you back or text you again for the remainder of the day and night.
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When you enter the lab the next day, Jungkook is already there, staring at your form entering through his glasses as he manspreads on his seat. You try not to look down, but avert your gaze instead, sitting down in a far corner of the room despite the fact that you’ve sat next to him more often than you can count.
From your peripheral sight, you catch that he’s still staring at you, but you try to focus on your unkempt and idle professor as you slip your arms into your lab coat. Seems like your teacher’s in a bad mood, because he wipes his tired eyes, waving you off nonchalantly before he mutters, “Produce an ointment. Any kind you want. You can work alone or as a duo.”
You learned to make ointments years ago. But okay – at least an easy task that doesn’t require the brainpower you don’t have today.
You decide to work alone – but as it seems, Jungkook has different plans.
From afar, you overhear him decline a girl or two and a boy who offer to get into a group with him; but he utters some convincing excuses and walks over to you instead. You feel him step closer, and your chest tightens.
Your body isn’t a blooming forest – the butterflies need to get the hell out of there.
“How are you?” he asks once you acknowledge him with a nod, putting on his lab coat and gloves before he grabs some ingredients from your hand, dividing the work.
“Good. How are you?”
You looked so fucking hot.
His words repeat in your mind like a broken record – by now, you’ve memorised the tone he whispered them in, the rise and fall of his voice, the casual confidence he put into it.
Shit. You should’ve worn that dress today.
“I’m okay,” he answers, dabbing at his forehead that shines in the slightest sheen of sweat that the summer causes, “was wondering what ointment you’re making.”
You mumble something so quietly that he doesn’t grasp it, and he leans in with furrowed eyebrows, asking again. Raising your voice, you control the volume of your sentence, telling him, “Burns. Against burns.”
His lips form an O before he licks them, tsk-ing and smirking as he states dramatically, “Apply it to my heart then.”
Huh.
“What?”
“Was wondering where you went yesterday.”
Oh. You didn’t think he’d care this much – makes you want to care even more.
“I…”
He interrupts you, waving calmly and reassuringly as he says, “I can totally let it go if you want me to, though. It’s cool, I promise!”
“No, I–” Okay. Stop stuttering. One more stutter and you’d slap yourself in front of him. “I made breakfast for my roommate.”
Jungkook nods as though he knew, his conversing tone jovial and cheerful as he asks, “Your roommate? Namjoon, was it?”
“Yes.”
Jungkook measures the powder used for the ointment, gazing at it carefully and focused. A crease carved between his eyebrows, he looks incredibly sexy, staring over the edge of his glasses, the tip of his tongue peeking out. The coat hugs his body perfectly, and his muscles flex each time he angles his arms.
It’s almost too much.
And then, he leans back, exhaling before he notes, “Damn. If you were my girlfriend, I’d make you breakfast every day.”
“I’m not his girlfriend,” you defend immediately – why, you can’t quite say, “but you knew that.”
“No harm in making sure…”
When his skin brushes yours, you think he’s doing it on purpose. You draw a sharp breath, so sure that he’s decoded your tense and freezing stance – but if he did, he doesn’t say anything. Acts like he’s concentrating on the task on hand while his shoulder keeps bumping against yours lightly.
And soon, he’s looking at you, his hand on the white table, fingers drumming against the handle of the water tap, and starts, “Hey, do you…” He nibbles his lower lip, dimples appearing on his cheeks as deep as your embarrassing nervousness. But he’s being shy. He’s being shy? Again? “Are you doing anything today? After class?”
“Oh,” you voice, not quite expecting his question, though a part of you hoped he’d ask something like this, “why?”
“There’s a place I wanted to show you. A castle kinda thing, and there are super many cherry blossom trees? I thought you might like it there, ‘cause,” he stops for a fleeting second, his tongue dashing along his lower lip, “I remember you once told me it’s your favourite flower.”
You’re baffled beyond imagination – not even your former boyfriends ever remembered, always bringing you a bouquet on Valentine’s day and your birthday, because they ”didn’t really know which one you like most.”
Is Jungkook this observant or is he just the genius you already see him as?
“You still remember that?” you ask, your eyes wide, your lip jutting out.
“Of course. Yeah. They’re my favourite, too.”
I want to do with you what spring does with the cherry trees.
Neruda’s quote has never rung this true – whatever emotions the pink petals inspire in you, they border on cheesy, sappy romance. If Jungkook is anyhow on the same wavelength as you, you might liquefy.
God, you want to say yes. If only to find a pretty tree and make out with him under it. No, scratch that. Just to be in his presence and see what he’s like when he’s not chasing girls. Or complimenting your ass.
“I’d love to, but… I can’t,” you tell him, and his face falls a little, sweet and tender; not the kind of fall that indicates a decreasing ego, but the type that resembles genuine chagrin. “I have to attend this study group with Yeosoo, and… it’s the last session before one of the exams, so…”
“Ah, it’s cool. Don’t sweat it. I just thought I might try.”
“Sorry.”
“All good, cutie,” he says with a wink, returning to your task while your fingers fiddle with the rest of the ingredients, brushing the bottle of oil. “I’ll just keep admiring you from afar in the meantime.”
“You’re…”
Within a moment, his eyes blow wide, his features flinching, and he grabs your hand tight when you take one wrong step. He pulls you closer until your palm is gripping his firm bicep – that you’re sure he flexes when you touch it – and almost falling into him.
You realise too late that he’s saved you from dripping oils that you somehow managed to spill, but his breath against your scalp and his chest against yours create a ferocious and frantic chaos behind your ribs.
In the silence of the moment, you see your classmates watching you, but Jungkook snatches all your remaining attention, his nimble fingers sliding along your waist and settling there to straighten your posture.
With your breath stuck in your throat and blue fire burning behind your cheeks, you apologise bashfully, breathing out the muddled up ball of air. You sit back again, frantically starting to clean up the mess, and the teacher strolls to you lazily just in time. He comes to a halt at the other side of your table; and when he leans in to inspect your progress, you wince.
Your professor doesn’t notice, but you’re perishing inside – the hand on your thigh belonging to a certain someone who’s started explaining how your ointment is doing shakes the last crumbs of sleep away.
He’s the downfall of you. You’ll be writing your will tonight.
A muffled question registers in your brain, and you don’t decipher it as a worried, “Are you okay?” from your professor until Jungkook nudges your arm and tells you the man is speaking to you.
Jungkook draws an endless circle on your skin; then proceeds to touch your knee – and the blood in your face is downright smouldering. You side-eye him for a moment, acting oblivious; attempting your best to answer your teacher’s question appropriately.
But the impish touch of your classmate’s treacherous fingers, sneaking up your leg and to the fabric of your shorts leaves you stuttering over simple words. He’s evidently trying to get back to you for vanishing so abruptly yesterday – who knew Jungkook’s way of punishing someone was this blatant?
You don’t push his hand away, because you don’t want it gone – in fact, you want this lesson to end and pull him into a spare, empty storage room. Want him to fuck you raw until the bottled ingredients clatter to the ground.
But then, he retracts his hand when your professor nods and walks on, and when you breathe a vexed, “Asshole”, he pats your shoulder playfully, his idiotic, silly smirk returning as he says, “Pity that you’re busy this afternoon.”
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He put an extra cautious emphasis on afternoon, stressing the word like he was using it for the first time.
When the doorbell rings near 10 pm, you let your novel fall, crawling off the sofa that you pulled out to a bed and rushing to the wooden entrance. You didn’t expect Namjoon to return home this fast – something must have happened on his little trip.
You ready yourself to mock the life out of him, eager to meet his wasted eyes and listen to his drunk rambling about the night he just experienced. But when you unlock the door and rip it open with your lips curled upwards, you find leaning against the frame… someone entirely else.
Instinctively, your hand descends to the hem of your shirt, covering at least a mere inch of your bare thighs as you stare into Jungkook’s amused face. He cocks an eyebrow at you, and your heart leaps; you act as if you don’t notice that he’s checking you out from head to toe.
You know he lives nearby – but you’re still surprised that he remembered where you live, too.
“What are you doing here?” you question, lowering your voice, focusing intently on keeping your voice steady. For now, you might want to stay very still – you know you’ll stammer if you don’t.
“I wanted to come by and say hi.”
“Are you… are you drunk?”
Jungkook rolls his eyes, leaning in closer as he regards you with a firm gaze and asks, “Do I look drunk to you?”
He makes sure to speak close to your face, and when you take in the scent of his minty breath, devoid of any hint of inebriation, you let your jaw fall shut. You were close to the climax of your book – in fact, you had planned to finish it to start the movie adaptation of it this Friday night.
You were entirely prepared for it: your hair arranged in a messy, cosy bun, your favourite long shirt draped over your body – or at least your torso – with the taste of your favourite ice cream flavour still lingering on your tongue.
You didn’t expect an interruption in the form of… him. But the way he stands there, confident but quiet, smiling at you in a way that should be illegalised and written into every book of law…
What was your novel about again?
“May I come in?” Jungkook asks, peering past you, and you blink once – twice.
Manners have always been your strongest trait, but it seems that Jungkook has turned your brain upside down and replaced coherent thoughts with ones of a clapping monkey toy. You gulp, and then step aside, apologising under your breath.
“No need to be sorry,” he says as he looks around, hands in the pockets of his joggers – oh god, he’s wearing joggers – and his voice low.
There’s a kind of groan in his words, one that usually accompanies his conversational tone; he must not realise what effect it has on people. Or maybe he does. You wouldn’t be surprised if he did.
“Why’re you really here?” you ask again, attempting to sound as polite as possible and not as though you’re scheming to throw him out again. Anytime soon.
“I was thinking of you.”
How is this so easy for him?
He’s leaning down to inspect a vase of yours, for crying out loud – how can he say such things so casually and expect from you to remain relaxed and collected with a steady heartbeat and a mind that doesn’t go into a frenzy and–
“Really?” you question, feigning calmness, hiding that the lower part of your body has entirely different plans.
You step further into the room and watch him scour his pockets as if they’re miles deep, and when he plummets onto your couch/make-shift bed, he’s holding a small plastic canister in his palm. He stretches his arm towards you and you take the object with questions etched between your eyebrows.
Turning the lid, you ask, “What’s that?”
“Open it.” And when you do and understand, recognising the smell and quality, up to par, he smiles, nodding as if to confirm your thoughts and says, “Ointment against burns. In case there’s ever a cooking accident or something!”
Flashing a smile back, you close the canister again, wrapping both your palms around it before you nod and say, “Thank you.”
“No worries.” Jungkook shoots a look at the discarded book, and then back to you, taking in the quietude of the apartment before he wonders, “Where’s Namjoon?”
“Joon’s out with Hobi and some other friends. They went bowling or something.”
“And you didn’t go with?”
You shrug, taking a seat on the other side of the couch, almost as if you’re dodging his emanating aura by putting a distance between you. God knows what you might do if Jeon Jungkook got too close. And after this morning’s events, you’re more nervous than ever before.
“Nah,” you respond, drawing patterns on your couch before flattening a hand over its material, “I’m bad at bowling.”
“That just means you haven’t been often enough.”
“No. Believe me, even Namjoon can confirm that I’m bad at it.”
“I’ll take you there sometime,” he promises, shifting until his body hits the back of the sofa, legs crossed over each other, “I refuse to believe you’re bad with balls.” Your lips part. You silence, looking at him in disbelief – and then, he laughs and adds, “That was a bad one.”
Both your laughter erupts in unison, and his eyes crinkle again when he chuckles, and his tattooed hands are adorned by veins, and his sounds are so soft and sickening and… this is becoming a problem.
As the last bits of your giggles subside, you scratch your jaw, mumbling, “When it comes to that, Namjoon won’t ever make fun of me.”
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“That wasn’t nothing.”
Your cheeks warm when you remember your early days as Namjoon’s roommate, and when a toe-curling memory returns in bits and pieces, a faded grey and dull, you grimace. Licking your lips, you look at Jungkook, attempting to sound casual when you admit, “Just. Well, freshman year, uh. Let’s just say Joon knows I’m… good with balls.”
You gulp the moment you utter the last syllable, and something resembling bafflement flashes across his features. He raises his eyebrows in disbelief, one corner of his lips twitching before his voice, dropping deeper, confesses, “I’d love to be him.”
His eyes are flaming, you think – a hint of possessiveness is dripping from them, and you feel your thoughts somersault as you dare to ask, “Why? You get something all the time.”
“If I was so pumped about just something, I wouldn’t be here.”
You wait.
He makes you restless. Your inner little self is chewing off its nails in your brain, eagerly awaiting his next steps, wondering what’s going through his head. As each second passes, his gaze cracks your mind a little more, and whenever he speaks, you feel pieces of yourself split in half.
You think perhaps he can see the hot air, steaming and cloudy, evaporate right over your head.
In reality, however, his thoughts are at an entirely different place.
Because his gaze is scanning your taut but simultaneously somehow confident demeanour. Brittle in some sense that you sit so far away, uncertain what to do with him or yourself. But your arms are folded beneath your breasts, pushing your tits up as if on purpose, and… he thinks he recognises that you’re not wearing a bra.
Don’t stare like that, he tells himself, but…
Bare legs built to seduce him… ending in the alluring curve of your ass. Your tell-tale shifting on the couch – the one he has experienced so many times with other girls before, a sign for silent yearning. And you’re avoiding his eyes, hands clasped between your thighs, as if to let your body whisper to him what you want him to do without saying a word.
Jungkook’s joggers and heart tighten when he speaks again – and your own heart revolts.
“Can you come closer?”
Your body tenses and your limbs become weightless – but somehow, you still manage to oblige, albeit several seconds later. You want to hum and ask what he wants; there must be some semblance of your irritation and sass left.
Right?
Right?
Jungkook pushes himself off the back of the couch as you draw closer, leaning into you as soon as you plant yourself next to him. You’re so close that his thigh could be touching yours if he killed the distance a little more.
But instead, he opts for something far more fatal: he lifts his hand, looking at you with a smile, and wipes a stray hair strand off your face. His touch is warm on your skin, his fingers soft and pleasant.
You realise he’s staring at the goosebumps on your neck and legs when his smile widens, and he doesn’t give you a moment to settle nor to think when he asks, “Would you wanna go look at cherry blossoms sometime?” His thumb strokes your jaw, and your heart jumps when he adds, “With me.”
You shut your open mouth, nibbling at your lower lip as his eyes follow your action before they dart back to your stare; and you question back, “You really want that?”
“I really want that.” He’s whispering, his pupils flitting to and fro, and you think that even his brain malfunctions for a moment when he finds nothing better to state than, “I think they’re pretty.”
And he thinks they’d look better with you underneath them. Perhaps you’d also realise that he’s not all that bad. Speaking of which.
“I promise I don’t ask this every girl,” he tells you, easing the dozen questions marked between your eyebrows and in your orbs, “I hardly ever go on dates at all, so…” His fingers wander to your chin, then trail along your jaw again, settling under your ear. “So I’d love it if you said yes.”
You’ll pass out. Right here, right now, on the spot, and you hope he catches your form, hope that he knows he’s the cause of your system error.
Is he really–
Damn it, you swore to yourself, you wouldn’t give in. Not to him. But it’s not your fault that he knows his way around words this well, that he can wrap you around his finger like it’s as easy to him as breathing.
Good for him. Because your lungs have apparently forgotten how to operate.
Dizzy and delirious, you manage to speak up, even if your answer contains nothing more but a measly, meek, “Okay.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.”
“Yeah…” He moves close enough for your breath to hitch, his own grazing your face before he freezes the blood in your veins. “May I – can I kiss you?” Searching your eyes for defiance without meeting any, he states, “Really kinda wanna kiss you.”
Deep inhales. Deeper exhales. No butterflies flutter in your stomach – a whole jungle roars.
“Yeah.”
And then, with his hand on your face, he leans in, planting his lower lip between your parted ones. His thumb brushes against the apple of your cheek, and he angles his head slightly before his mouth starts to move.
His hand travels down to the small of your back, pulling you closer, and his lips part yours further when his tongue darts out to glide along the seam of your mouth. You hiss, and he swallows the sound immediately, endlessly more eager when your tongue meets his halfway.
A soft moan collides with your own, and before you know it, he’s shifted you half onto his lap. You move keenly, resting your ass on his thigh, and draping an arm around his neck to pull him closer.
Your breathing accelerates when he places his hand on your left inner thigh, prying your legs open, never leaving the heat of your lips. But when you back away, whimpering just a little, you catch his hooded stare for merely a moment before he’s turning you in his grip.
“Fuck, that was…” he whispers, pressing your back against his chest as your legs fall apart and next to each of his reflexively, “the best kiss I ever had.”
His palm touches your knee and then moves up to the hem of your shorts again, his fingers tugging at the knotted strings as you joke, “You’re lying.”
“Believe me… I don’t lie about such things,” he assures, still pulling at the strings, “so hot, and we’ve barely done anything yet…”
Yet.
Goddamn.
He opens the knot and roams your stomach, his mouth caressing your neck as he calls your name and mutters, “May I?” Digits sneak underneath your shorts and touch your pelvis, and an arm wraps around your torso as he adds, “Can I touch you, pretty?”
“I… I’d be mad if you didn’t.”
Jungkook’s chuckle reverberates in your head before his face nuzzles the crook of your neck. Once you grant him permission with another moan, his hands hurry to pull down your shorts and panties in the gentlest way – and when you find yourself bare on his lap, you shut your eyes tightly.
From his point of view, he can’t even admire your pussy properly – but having you spread in his grip, your chest heaving, drives him insane within a moment.
He draws lines on your tummy and your waist, drawing closer to where your cunt aches for him, and when two pads of his fingers press against your clit, you dig your nails into the material of the couch.
“Easy, sweetheart,” he coos, starting to move his fingers in circling motions.
His free hand grabs your jaw and moves your head to the side, allowing him to explore more of your neck and your shoulder. You’re not certain what it is about the movements of his tongue, but his touch lights up one spot after the other. You might be glowing at the end of the night; a burning torch in the dark once the sun has set.
His cock, filling with blood and eagerness, presses against your ass when you squirm in his hold, and he flattens his fingers over your clit before he rubs them along your pussy. He spreads your folds apart, teasing your entrance with the tip of his fingers as he says, “Talk to me.”
But you don’t; you keep wiggling, lifting your shirt, baring your tits – not covered by a bra as deduced. And as he stares, his eyes nearly fall out of their sockets, and the moment you pinch your nipple between your fingers, he plunges his between your aching walls.
“Oh, fuck,” Jungkook mumbles, furrowing his eyebrows when you throw back your head and arch your back. You look divine like this, and he can barely even see your face. “Talk to me, I said.”
“Not… enough.”
“What isn’t?”
He digs his digits in up to their knuckles, impressed by your dripping arousal, and brings his other hand to where he massaged your clit earlier.
“Need your dick… please.”
“Shit, you’re begging already, I–” He shakes his head, kisses a trail up your face, halts at your temple. “All in due time, okay? Lemme just…”
His fingers work skilled and agonisingly around your heat, alternating between slow and fast – and right when the coil in your stomach threatens to dissolve, his hands retract. You let out a breath you were – apparently – holding, and your palms shoot down to your pussy to keep the lack of touch minimal.
“I was gonna–” you exclaim, whining, trying to complete the job he didn’t to not let your approaching high disperse.
But then he grabs your wrist and pulls your arm aside, leaving your pussy begging and screaming as he says, “I know. Not yet.”
With your orgasm fading, you curse under your breath, wrestling out of his grip before he lets you go voluntarily. He brings his inked fingers to your mouth, breaking through the seam of your lips before you register his silent command and start sucking.
You twirl your tongue, collecting saliva, drenching his digits as he praises, “Jesus… you really know how to use this big mouth of yours, huh?”
A combination of hums and moans leaves your throat, sucking for a moment longer before he pulls out again, throwing a cocky “thank you” your way before he’s spreading your spit between your nether lips again.
He remains there for just a moment this time, and then stops, telling you, “You’ve no idea how bad I wanna taste you.”
As if he wasn’t fingerfucking you stupid, your thoughts derail and a power outage shuts your brain. The image of Jungkook eating you out… holding you down…
Where are you? What time is it? What’s your name?
“Got a condom for me, baby?”
Your inner self keysmashes, and your mind goes bbbrrrzzz for a moment before you gather your thoughts, embarrassed and dizzy, and tell him, “My room,” you point at your door behind the couch, “bedside table… second drawer…”
Jungkook plants a tender kiss at the corner of your lips, and then pushes you onto the couch gently. He stands with a giant, fat bulge stretching his joggers, and you ogle at it for a second, half naked, before he brushes a hand through his hair and says, “Take off your clothes. I want you fully naked and on your knees once I’m back.”
Amidst the hazy atmosphere, you somehow find the courage to roll your eyes, and he laughs sweetly, indulging in your cuteness before he walks away. You hurry to drag the shirt over your head, shifting to bend over the arm of the couch as you wait; and before you can do anything more, he’s back, impatient and hurried.
He throws the package next to you, ridding his body of his shirt and his joggers smoothly. You crane your neck to look at him, and lower your torso, lifting your ass until you hear him hiss and remark, “Stop that.”
“Stop what?”
“Pressing your ass into my face, brat.”
“I’m doing no such thing. Just did what you told m–”
A harmless but firm slap rings in your ears, eliciting a gasp out of you as his knees hit the couch. He crawls closer before he pulls his underwear down; and by all deities above, if you’d known what was coming at you, you would’ve started all of this so much sooner.
Because you can’t stop staring. Standing erect and rock hard, his leaking cock inches closer, its sheer length and thickness so overwhelming that you almost turn around and ready yourself to drool around it.
But Jungkook grabs a handful of your ass again, slamming a palm against your flesh before he warns, “Behave, will you? You wanna be able to walk tomorrow, don’t you?”
“I…” you begin, your eyes rolling back when he spits into his hand again and palms your cunt. He shoves his fingers into you once more, curling them for a moment before he pulls out and you continue, “I don’t wanna be able to walk tomorrow.”
“What?”
“Want you to… fuck my brains out,” you admit, pressing your cheek against the sofa arm before you add politely, “please.”
“I… I won’t be able to hold back, if you keep saying that.” A sound of foil ripping echoes through the room; for a moment, it’s silent, but then, he moves closer, the head of his cock prodding your entrance. “I might just wreck your shit.”
You move your ass towards him some more, provoking, “Do to me whatever you wanna, Kook.”
Damn it.
His nickname falling out of your mouth is so ridiculously cute; but the rest of your sentence is coated with coarse vulgarity. 
“Fuck, that filthy mouth of yours… it’s gonna kill me,” Jungkook whispers, holding your hips in place when your movements don’t stop, “stay still for me, baby.”
But you don’t need to stop your hips from provoking him further, because when the tip of his cock pushes in, your body becomes light as a feather, trembling, voiding, as though he punctured the tyre that your torso is. The more he buries of himself, the more you think there can’t be more to fill you up.
Jungkook, however, keeps going, and when he finally stops, he dares to say, “Gonna take it easy, okay?”
And he does – begins with a soft groan that vibrates through the sound waves of the air, his hands still on your waist as he moves in and out slowly. Breathing heavier, you clutch the couch, broken moans falling off your tongue as he fucks you with half his cock still out.
“How’s it feel?” he asks, snapping you out of your daze.
Trapped in a cubicle of carnal lust and yearning, you swallow, muttering, “Good… you can,” you press your lips together when he plunges in again, mewling, “you can go faster.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes… please.”
On second thought, Jungkook wonders if his question was required at all – because you’re sucking him in anyway, a waterfall making a mess of his length, as if the walls of your pussy are dragging him in incessantly.
So he obliges, and his motions change, moving faster and just a little harder. More of his cock disappears into your cunt. His eyes jump to the way your ass adjusts to his ministrations, pressing against his hips; and he squeezes it once, groaning in exasperation before he says, “I’m usually proud of my stamina.”
You let out a shaky exhale, attempting to look at him, and voice, “Huh?”
“Just dunno how long I’ll be,” a sharp thrust and your body reels forward, “able to hold back today… with you.”
He clouds your senses without mercy, and human language becomes a mirage that dissipates whenever you think you’ve found words to utter again. You think you wouldn’t mind being fucked by him for the rest of your life; you wouldn’t even be opposed if he decided to break you in half, if it meant you get to experience one more pounding session with Jeon Jungkook.
He’s still not balls deep inside you until he stops abruptly, taking a second to admire your form; but that second stretches too long for your liking. Keeping your balance by holding onto the couch tighter, you push your ass back, not stopping until you feel skin against yours.
You’re amazed just how easily he slides in; how easily your pussy swallows him, eager to feel every inch of him. And once you start fucking yourself on him harsher and with more force, Jungkook exclaims, “Oh my fucking god.” Waits a little, brushes his damp hair back, blinking before he carries on, “Aren’t we cock hungry?”
“Y-your cock… yes…” You hate stroking his ego, but you can’t detect a single lie in your words. And so, you add, “Feels so good, Jungkook.”
Clenching your jaw, you open your eyes, the door of Namjoon’s room in front of you blurry when you feel tears of pleasure build along your waterline. You whine and cry out, taking him all in. His cock pierces through you with tantalising rubs, and you think that if you’re not careful, you might feel him in your guts all too soon.
“You look good enough to eat, y’know?” Jungkook praises as he watches you engulf his cock whole, hard, fast.
You blend out the sounds coming out of you, ones you’re sure you’ve never heard before, and tell him, “Thanks. I’d love to– to see you too, though.”
Your attempt at leaving him motionless and speechless comes to end when he wraps his palms around your shoulders, hot skin colliding before he slams into you out of nowhere. Once and twice, meeting your actions; and then, he stops as fast as he began, suddenly pulling out and leaving you empty and pulsating.
Another – harsher – slap lands on your ass, and you’re close to buckling and turning around before he pushes your rear up with his hands, leaning down and attaching his lips to your pussy.
His tongue moves in figure eights, the wet muscle, soothing and soft compared to his solid dick, lapping up your juices, gathering extra spit on its surface until the saliva is dripping onto your sofa. He wraps his mouth around your clit, sucking gently and with just the right amount of force.
The groans vibrate through your body, and he whispers unintelligible words that you can’t quite make sense of. You know he’s tilting his head when he pushes your ass cheeks apart some more and digs in further, tasting you thoroughly. He hums deep into your pussy, and only emerges with a smack when your eyes have already rolled back into your head.
“As much as I like your taste,” he then murmurs. You continue to keen and moan, pressing your cheek against the couch, overwhelmed from the sensation; and when he plummets against the back of the sofa, he orders, “Ride me, doll.”
“You know…” you start, meeting his hungry eyes as your quivering limbs carry you closer to him, “on any other day, I’d laugh if you called me that.”
Jungkook laughs before he traps his lip between his teeth, observing your every movement; breathes out deeply when you straddle him. As you plant your hands on his chest, his fingers bring his cock back to your entrance, and he questions quietly, “And today?”
“Today… you could recite the entire periodic table and I’d find you,” you lower yourself onto him, closing your eyes with your tits trapped between your arms, “so fucking sexy.”
“Perhaps… later then, huh? Let’s see which element we make it to.”
Number 8.
Oxygen.
You need oxygen – he’s too smug; too much. You might lose your mind, if you don’t focus.
And so, you smile down onto him, and the lewd mess that you’re living through suddenly becomes a dream to him – admittedly, one that he imagined differently. Not this sudden. Not this good.
He bottoms out each time you fall back onto him, your hips drawing patterns of eight, feet digging into the couch. Your tits bounce with each descend of your body, and you rub your clit against his pelvis any chance you get.
Blissful and lost, your fingers skid along his abs, grazing the ridges, and then come back to his firm chest, sweaty under your touch as you admit, “You’re crazy hot.”
Jungkook’s eyes shimmer at the sudden compliment; he presses into your thighs harder, earning a fierce scraping of your nails against his skin. He’s sure you’re leaving scratch marks – he reckons he’ll probably die when he finds them light red and faded the next day once he glances into the mirror.
With you on top, he shifts a little, gathering his energy in his muscles once more before he places a hand at the nape of your neck and pulls you down to him in a swift motion. His parted lips crash against yours, all teeth and tongue; but the kiss is less a kiss and more a battle for dominance.
Your moans gain on volume when he begins jackhammering into you, arms pressing you down until you’re flush against him. Nearly screaming into his ear, you wrap your fingers in his hair, registering every sweep of his teeth and tongue along your neck as you shriek, “Oh my god, just like that, ple–”
“Such a good girl, being vocal like that… taking me like that,” he drawls, fucking into you powerfully, “my good girl, aren’t you?”
An ocean of rippling desire courses through you like ecstasy, and you scold yourself internally for swallowing the drug that Jungkook is this fast. But who are you to deny that you’ve finally found answers to your hitherto barred questions? Once wondering what exactly makes him so charismatic, so flamingly intriguing… now you know.
Still processing his praises, he pulls your drowning mess out of your vertigo. And then, he flips you over effortlessly, still balls deep inside you as he comes to hover above you. He leans down and catches your nipple between his teeth, alternating between nibbling and crude sucking as his hand fondles with your other breast.
Wet hair falls like a dark curtain around his face, and your nerves go haywire when he pushes into you deep. Pinned against and fucked into the cushions, his mouth on your tits sends a current through your body. Once he emerges, he seeks your gaze, fingers on your jaw as he asks, “How do you feel?”
“I… so much better than… I imagined.”
“Imagined?”
A question mark forms in his eyes, but he smirks vainly, bringing his face to yours until his breath is smogging your mind once again. But then, you revoke your statement, claiming, “It’s nothing.”
He stares at you quietly before he chuckles, still not convinced, and smacks your tit. His hand settles around your neck slowly, carefully as he commands, “Spill.”
You nearly choke on your saliva when he presses into your neck gently, lifting your head. Capitulating, you wail before you confess, “Had a dream… the night we– we matched.”
“Yeah?” Jungkook whispers, his tongue gliding along your lips. “Elaborate.”
“I– wanted you to fuck me so fucking bad, but… you ass never did.”
“Dream Jungkook is a damn jerk then. I would never,” his pounding slows down, his legs tired, and he waits a moment before he continues, “I thought about it, too. Don’t know why but…”
Another pause, significantly longer this time.
“But?”
“Always kinda thought of kissing you in the rain and stuff…”
He murmurs it like he’s embarrassed of the revelation; provides one hard thrust as if to veil his softness behind his devilish actions. But you laugh lightly, still not used to his inked hand around your throat as you tease, “How sappy.”
“I can be, okay?” he argues, his free palm raising your leg up his torso. You hum and call his name as he speaks, faintly hearing, “As in… wanna tell you how gorgeous you look with my fingers around your neck. Like… like a pretty necklace.”
“Romance isn’t dead, huh?”
“Well,” he answers, chuckling before his palm vanishes, holding your hips instead, “I don’t think about kissing in the rain with just anyone.”
“And now…” you breathe, your arms snaking around his neck, “can you kiss me now, too?”
It takes a mere smile and a closing of distance to give in to you, the kiss soft yet messy somehow. Barely any time passes before you’re rubbing your clit and creaming his cock, the orgasm so intense and mind-numbing that your entire body shakes.
Your legs grow weak, your soul ascending – it takes you a moment to open your eyes and look at him again, but when you do, he’s staring at you in admiration. Like he’s seeing you for the first time. And then, he says, “You’re… the fucking hottest girl I’ve ever seen.”
And coming from Jeon Jungkook, this must be the compliment of the century.
Not soon after, his movements become sloppy and unsteady too, and when his voice falls a few octaves, you know what’s happening before he says it, “Gonna come, I–”
He pulls out, ripping the condom off; but before he can jerk himself off, you sit up straight, surprising him pleasantly when you grab his cock and take him into your mouth as much your throat allows. His shaft hits the back and triggers your gag reflex almost immediately, but you don’t falter as you begin to bop your head back and forth.
Your tongue swirls around the smooth skin – and with him already on the edge, it takes barely a minute before his cock twitches and he calls your name. His body shivers, his hand in your hair; one more suck and… you close your eyes.
Breathing through the nose, you swallow every rope of cum he spills inside you, his hips stuttering as much as his voice – and then, he’s done, his chin resting against his chest. Sinking back into the couch, he pulls you with him, chuckling a little as he says, “Now that was. Really unexpected.”
“In a good way, I hope.”
“Are you kidding? In the best way.”
You fall onto his torso softly, placing your hands under your cheek as you look up at him and catch your breath. The room is sex-scented and hot, but the heat doesn’t compare to when Jungkook meets your gaze gently.
He smiles at you, wiggling his eyebrows as if to ask how it’s going; and you laugh, telling him, “That was crazy. Pinch me, so I know it happened.”
You think he’ll oblige, if only to tease you – but instead, he pulls you closer, pecking your lips once as he confirms, “It happened.” He bites into his lower lip, watching your eyelashes fall timidly before he adds, “I… listen, I know what you think of me. And you might be right about most things, but…”
No matter how much confidence he exudes on any other day, he seems to stumble over his words a lot when he’s around you. You wonder what it is today that has him struggling this way.
“But that was a great deal to me,” he continues, gulping, “and I’d like to do it again. Not just fucking you, but like… spending time with you. A genuine date.”
“I believe you,” you finally muster to admit. After the gazes he threw at you, the touches you shared and the words you exchanged… there must be some truth. You reckon he wouldn’t bother to say those things if he was just toying with you. “Where’s that cherry blossom park then?”
“I’ll take you there!” Jungkook chimes optimistically, his arms around you squeezing your body once.
You’re laughing about god knows what and talking about the most obscure topics, bare, sweat-soaked and slightly shuddering. And then, out of the blue, he clicks his tongue, shaking his head as he remarks, “Can’t believe you dreamed of me.”
With heated cheeks, you pout, hiding your face a little before you take it a step further and say, “I also imagined you taking off your glasses and kissing me…”
“When?”
“In uh… class.”
“Woah. That’s not even dreaming anymore.”
“It hasn’t happened that often!” you defend, slapping his firm bicep playfully while joining his delighted, amused snicker.
He pushes you to your back, pinning your wrists to the couch to stop your gentle attacks. His nose brushes yours, his lips a hair’s breadth away as he whispers, “Really not?”
“No.” He cocks an eyebrow, and you shrug. “No! I didn’t!”
“If you say so.”
And then, he’s leaning in more, kissing you gingerly; and when he pulls back, you smile, your eyes falling to the mole on his neck as you say, “By the way. Can I ask you something?”
“Hmm?”
“Would you ever name your car – and if yes, then what?”
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When Monday morning rolls around, you show up in class wearing the dress from last summer. It’s cute and cosy, hugging you at just the right places. He’s right – you should’ve flaunted it and yourself more.
And apparently, he loves it just as much as before, because he grins when you walk in and occupy a free seat two rows behind him. He turns and looks over his shoulder, smiling at you with a slight nod that you return in kind.
His eyes look soft and sweet; his stance relaxed and comfortable – and before he turns back, he takes off his glasses, licks his lips and winks. Shamelessly, intriguingly.
You make a mental note to ask him where the dress looks better; on your body – or on his floor.
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YAY am i the only one who loves them so much 😭 if you enjoyed nmf, please don’t forget to like, reblog (!!!) and let me know what you think !! writing fics takes ages, so even a small feedback is truly appreciated <33
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jimilter · a month ago
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put it on me (m) | p.jm. | one-shot
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When you signed up to model your cleavage for a jewelry commercial, no one bothered to tell you it wasn’t gonna be a solo shoot. It’s unfair being blindsided and you want to protest, but A-list model and flirt extraordinaire Park Jimin’s steel-cut abs have you kinda tongue-tied. And then you get kinda too busy thinking of other ways in which you’d like him to shut you up.
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pairing: jimin x reader rating: m (18+) genre: smut | humor | pwp | a-list model!jimin | freelance model!reader warnings: swearing + lustful musings + explicit daydreams + reader is boobacious + reader is also a horny bitch + explicit sexual situations (dom!jimin, sub!reader, body worship, sweat kink, dirty talk, degradation, strength kink, praise kink, oral (m&f), throat fucking, vaginal fingering, clit biting, semi-public sex, hints of exhibitionism, humiliation, begging, rough sex, penetrative sex, cum play, breast play, jimin loves her tiddies and she loves his tiddies, Big Dick Jimin™ bec he’s literally canon, orgasm denial, overstimulation, restraints, biting, marking, a lot of licking ugh) + i am slightly ashamed of myself for going so feral, but very very slightly :| word count: 8 k note: hi, guys. welcome to filth on crack. no fr, if i were to put smack (smutty crack) in a dictionary, i would define it with this fic. idk what chemical exploded in my head. but i am very sorry for what you’re about to witness. believe it or not, this didn't happen solely due to the pictures, tho. @missgeniality bullied me into writing this, sending me pictures and filthy scenarios, to the point where i cried and sat down to do this. any yells and/or notes of gratitude to be sent to her, please. oh and @jeonjcngkook shall also shoulder partial blame for spamming me with different zoomed in angles and versions of the pictures without break. smh. ily both <3
hope y'all enjoy this while i go dunk myself into some holy water~ 😩💜
— masterlist | feedback!
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“I wasn’t told there was a… male model in attendance as well?”
The Director rolls his eyes at your words – rolls his fucking eyes as if him turning your solo shoot into a couple one should not make you ask questions. You never should’ve let Hoseok’s meddlesome ass rope you into this. You don’t have an agency for a reason, you need to stop letting your model friends affect the projects you sign. What's the point of managing your contracts yourself if you’re gonna be an idiot about them? Ugh. 
All this heavy, clunky jewelry on your nearly naked body—well, you have a white, crochet bikini on, but it feels close to nothing due its plunging v-neck and the tie-up thong—and now you won’t even be the center of all attention.
What is the fucking point?
“It’s a last minute addition because the company thinks this chain will look better on a male torso.” The Director flashes all his teeth at you, but you fail to make out any humor in this situation. “Besides, the male model is kind of an A-lister.”
Wow, even better. They signed freaking Sean O’Pry or the likes and now you’re gonna be used as a prop, probably made to lay over the dude’s body like a snake or something while you awkwardly make bedroom eyes at him and he looks off to the side and awkwardly avoids touching you inappropriately. Great. Just great. You swear the moment you talk to Hoseok again, you will—
Hold on a fucking minute.
Who the hell is that?
Your jaw slowly unhinges, falling wide and wider as a guy steps into your view, talking to the annoying Director you were contemplating punches a few minutes back. 
Oh, he’s not a guy, for fuck’s sake. This is Park Jimin – face of more brands than you can count on both your hands. With a jawline sharper than a knife, pouty lips, half-lidded eyes and a solidly built body that he must be living in the gym to maintain, he is the most sought after model of today. If a brand needs some delicious display of naked male chest or abs or thighs? Park Jimin’s their guy. No, for real, man takes off his shirt at the drop of a hat. Pants too, for that matter.
Not that you’re complaining, though, no, far from it. He looks like a whole snack in that floral printed jacket that he’s got on without anything underneath. His abs are so defined, you can literally count all six of them across the twenty feet’s distance between you two, and his dusky pectoral muscles bulge tantalizingly. 
Wow.
A five-course meal is shooting this commercial with you.
Now you want to be used as a prop and lay across his body like a snake and make bedroom eyes at him and, fuck, you hope he touches you inappropriately. Which you probably won’t have to hope too hard for, given how he’s always in the news for sleeping with everyone he works with. Damn, you need to send Hoseok a gift basket after this. 
Fuck, he’s looking your way.
Short, slicked back hair bares the entirety of his forehead for your viewing pleasure, and the strong line of his brows immediately has your breath hitching. He isn’t just beautiful or sexy, Park Jimin is handsome. And ripped. Fuck, he’s really bulging with muscles with every step he takes; your strength kink is quaking. You are staring but your gaze is also jumping around his entire body because you really don’t know where to look – there’s so much to take in between the clenching planes of his abdomen, the heaving pair of his pectorals, the thick pads of his shoulders and those thighs that seem to want to tear through his pants. 
There is jewelry on him, identical to yours with regards to its make. But contrary to the single thick chain that’s adorning your cleavage, he’s got two shorter, choker-like necklaces as well, sitting prettily on his sharp collarbones. He’s also wearing earrings, which you didn’t have to because they were covering your ears with hair.
You’re so lost in sharpening your focus, that you barely even realize he is nearing you. Plump lips thin out around a straight line of teeth and hooded eyes squint in humor. 
His smirk is devastating. You’re down bad, you’re down fucking bad. 
How to ask him to fuck your throat without offending him? You don’t really care because you’re about to be very crude about it. You might get thrown off the set and kicked out of the project, but you’re willing to risk it all by going tongue-emoji eggplant-emoji on him. Shit, is he emanating pheromones? Are y’all werewolves? What is going on, why do you keep getting this urge to climb him up and rub your body all over his? You…are in love with this man. That’s the only logical explanation. Or maybe it’s your pussy that’s in love with him, but because she pretty much represents you right now, it is nothing but undying love you feel flowing from you to him.
“Hey—”
“My pussy’s in love with you.”
Jimin’s eyebrows lift up high and higher until they reach a point where they’d be off his forehead if he was a cartoon character. 
And you get it. That was too direct. And too soon. You could’ve at least waited for the dude to finish his damn greeting. 
“Uh…” His eyelids flutter rapidly over rounded eyes, and fuck, how does he look adorable on top of being sex-on-legs? Quickly looking around the two of you, he sidles a few inches closer and lowers his stunned – and stunning – face to your eye-level. “Come again?”
Oh, you will. You surely will come again but you need to come for the first time before that. And you need to introduce yourself to him like a normal human before that.
“I mean, hello, Jimin. It is nice to meet you.” You try to put on a smile as you give him your name. Your eyes glide down his throat to land on his pecs again. A wistful sigh makes it past your lips. “You’ve got nice tiddies.”
And this is when Jimin finally snaps out of his reverie to cough out a bewildered laugh. Soon after, his face is morphing back into the panty-melting smirk you saw him wear earlier and he’s laughing with his whole body, allowing his shoulders to jump and head to shake.
His laughter is kinda cute.
You still wanna climb him, though.
“Hello, sweetheart,” he finally says to you, his words more of a wondrous exhale than actual speech. “Thank you for the compliment. Although they’re more than just nice, won’t you say?”
Your back meeting a cold metal has you hissing, and you blink in surprise at the realization of how easily he walked you back towards his trailer without you realizing. His tiddies distracted you.
“True.” You nod, tilting your chin up to fight back a shiver when your bare back meets icy cold metal once again. “They’re sort of amazing.”
Jimin’s grin turns filthy, gaze wholly unabashed as it scans your own chest. You know your nipples are pebbled because you can feel goosebumps running across your entire body. He lifts a ringed hand and very carefully places the tip of his index finger in the hollow of your neck. Dark gaze catches yours again as the digit begins a fiery journey down your sternum, running past the chain resting there, and easily fitting between the tight cleavage of your half naked boobs.
A deep gasp leaves your chest, body arching to invite further invasion from him. And he complies, bringing his thumb up to softly rub it over the skin of your exposed boob, between the edge of the scrap of crochet that’s holding it in place, and the metallic jewelry advertised over it.
"Yours, too," he mumbles suddenly, eyes glued to the tip of your breast protruding against the thick fabric of the bra.
For a second, you're lost. Because how are you supposed to keep track of your conversation when the entire set around you has faded away and all you can see, breathe and feel is Park Jimin?
But then it suddenly registers that you'd complimented his…well, tiddies, which means that he's now complimenting yours. Oh, wow. Is this supposed to flatter you? Turn you on? Or make you wanna laugh? Somehow, it's doing all three.
Coughing through a snort, you bite down on your bottom lip and shake your head. “Just amazing? I expected a higher praise.”
“Oh yeah?” Jimin's gaze comes flying up to clash with yours, mirth swimming in his brown eyes. “But I haven’t seen them naked like you did mine. This is the best you get on these unfair grounds, baby.”
Fuck, fuck, you don’t breathe for a whole lot of seconds after that. 
Wide-eyed, you trace the way Jimin’s tongue peeks out of his mouth to scrape against his bottom lip. It’s wet and soft and so red, you wanna taste it. Breathless and delirious, you’re tilting your head and inching towards him when – his other hand comes up to cup one of your tits, placed firmly against the globe in such a way that his thumb makes an easy swipe of your hard nipple.
“Ah!”
His lips quirk up at your gasp and he erases a few more inches of distance between you two, this time nearly molding your soft curves against his solid planes.
“I would very much like to, though,” he murmurs so close to your lips, you can almost taste his breath. It is chocolate flavored. “If you’d allow it?”
As if his smirk wasn’t fucking distracting in itself, his thumb’s relentless back anf forth motions over your nipple is wiping all thoughts out of your head. Oh, God. This guy is sexually hypnotising you. Next thing anyone knows, you’ll be on your knees, ready to suck him off in public. 
In…public.
Public!
Snapping out of the daze Jimin put you in, you peek around his broad body. To your relief, everyone is still running around like headless chickens and no one is so much as looking in the direction of the two of you.
Still. You might be horny enough to let go of a shoot in favor of bomb sex with the sexiest guy you’ve ever seen. But you’re not horny enough to be sex-taped by an entire studio full of people.
“Not here, of course,” he reassures you in the same low, husky voice he’s been using all this time. 
Either he read the horror on your face, or he can read minds. Maybe you’re right about Jimin’s hypnotic abilities. Wow, is this why people keep falling into his bed left and right? Ooh, or maybe he just has a strong dick game. Well. You can’t wait to find out.
“I…” You clear your throat, suddenly a bit conscious about both his hands using your boobs as stress balls out in the open where anyone can see you. You’re still destroying your bikini bottoms with warm arousal, but your brain is slowly catching up on how crazy your life will get if you made an accidental soft porn sex tape with Park Jimin in the middle of a shoot. “I’ll meet you…here? After the shoot?”
Jimin looks at you with amusement infused incredulity. “After the…” He sighs, shaking his head with a fond smile. His hands come up to cup your cheeks. “Sweetheart. There’s no afters in my life. I’m offering you my dick now – as a one time offer. It’s not a bookmark now and read later scheme, okay? So either you say yes, we slip into my trailer and I see how much your pussy actually loves me. Or you say no, we finish the shoot and forget this interaction ever happened.” He removes his hands from your face and crosses them across his beefy body, while one of his eyebrows shoots up in question. “Which will it be?”
Your jaw is currently on the floor. This guy is dangerous. He literally propositions sex as if he’s making a business deal! 
You want him.
Instead of saying it, you try to show it – grabbing the lapels of his jacket and allowing a smirk to curl upon your lips. “Yes.”
His eyes sparkle with excitement and dark promises and teeth dig into his bottom lip. “Jeremy!” he suddenly calls for your Director, and for a moment you fear he trapped you into a seductive conversation to have you kicked off set on grounds of sexual harrassment, until – he continues with a, “Take a break, my dude! I’ll be back in a while!”
Some shuffling, rustling and grumbling echoes around you. Jimin never breaks eye-contact even as he punches the code to unlock his trailer right next to your head. His gaze is so fucking intense, he makes you wetter just by looking at you.
“R–right, Mister Park! Do… do we arrange for… spares?” comes a scream back in your direction.
“You know it, Jer.” Jimin grins and you frown in confusion.
“Spares?”
“Our outfits.”
Oh. Oh. Park Jimin really is an A-lister, huh?
You don’t get to think much on it when he unlocks and pulls the door to his trailer open and guides you in, walking you backwards up the stairs while he locks you two in. A gust of air-conditioned air washes over you when you reach the floor, sending a shiver through your entire body. But because Jimin hasn’t stopped walking, you move further until the backs of your legs knock against what feels like a chair. Knees buckling, you fall into a cushy chair and thickly swallow at the daunting sight of Jimin standing over you. You’re almost at the level of his crotch. Perfect.
But before you can even get your hands to move from their clutching of the armrest, Jimin drops to his knees and lines his face up with your boobs. Oh. Yeah, this works too. This is what he was focussed on, anyways.
“May I?” you teasingly question, looping a thumb beneath one of the straps at your shoulder.
Jimin looks at you in faux disappointment. “That color looks amazing against your skin, sweetheart. Feels like a crime to take it off.”
You blink in confusion because, um. What else are you supposed to be doing, then?
The man before you answers your unasked question with his own hands, reaching towards the cups of your bikini top to pinch the edge of each between an index finger and thumb, and pulling the cloth away from your skin. 
His eyes look into yours. “This okay?”
You’re about to splinter the wood of the fucking armrest with how much sexual tension has accumulated in your body because of his ass, and he has the audacity to still ask? Like. He’s obviously asking for your consent and it is sexy as fuck. But it’s also inconvenient as fuck because he isn’t hurrying up the way you need him to!
Nodding as quickly and rapidly as you can manage, you exhale a breathy ‘yes’ along with it, just in case he’s one of those guys who are anal about “verbal consent.” You quite possibly are an embarrassment to feminists and healthy sex advocates that keep preaching “communication during sex with your partner” and all that jazz, but – you’re a very basic bitch, right now. Tongue-emoji eggplant-emoji. 
Why’s he being so artistic about it?
“Good.”
And then finally, finally, the crochet is tugged away from your breasts and your twin globes spring free, literally tumbling into Jimin’s face as he eagerly leans closer. His nose presses against one of your hardened nipples, and you watch the brown in his irises bleed into black within a moment. 
Both his palms nearly scramble to lift the weight of your tits in them, fingers squeezing into the soft flesh, the intensity of which increases the louder you moan. The pads of his thumbs flick at your nipples a couple of times, until your back arches and head is tossed back. That is when Jimin releases one of your boobs to cup the back of your neck and pull your gaze back to his. The tip of his thumb scrapes around your sensitive areola, all the while his fiery gaze stares into your soul.
And then, to run your sanity completely off the track, he lowers his face to the neglected mound and, slowly releasing the back of your neck, brings his other hand to cup the curve of your breast. His dark gaze never leaves yours when his lips make contact with your nipple, but yours leaves his when he envelops the nub into the warmth of his mouth as you clench your eyes shut and cry out.
“Mm hm,” he hums around your flesh and runs his tongue across the hard peak as if he’s licking up ice-cream. “You like it, baby?”
“L–love it, Jimin…”
Humming again, he gets to work, sucking on your boob with all his might. His other hand resumes work at the same time, massaging the other tit while his thumb presses against the nipple and twirls it around in an agonizingly pleasurable motion. His teeth make no delays in joining in on the torture, brushing over your skin slowly, and then when Jimin opens his mouth wider to wrap his tongue around the entirety of your bud, they press into the flesh just above your areola.
“Fuck fuuu~k!” 
You can barely formulate any coherent thought at this point, Jimin’s occasional grunts barely registering with you, especially after he changes sides and lets his tongue lap at the other nipple he’d been abusing with his thumb.
“Jim—in,” you whine, twisting up in your place – whether to escape the torturous fire in the pit of your belly or to delve further in it? You have no fucking idea. “Please… please…”
The guy responds by engulfing as much of your boob as he can in his mouth. You scream his name this time, and he responds with a deep grunt, placing both his hands on your waist as if to ground himself. Well, he’s grounding you too, because your head is among fucking clouds.
Sounds of wet, sloppy kisses fill the space around you, making it extremely difficult for you to open your eyes. But this is the opportunity of a lifetime, so you fight against the brain-melting pleasure to pry your eyelids apart – and take in the sight of Park Jimin's mouth working on your breast. His eyes are shut and brows are scrunched up in concentration. The graze of his plump, reddened lips against your skin is the most erotic sight you have ever seen in your entire life.
One of Jimin's hand journeys down past your hip to grip onto your thigh, while the other travels up to wrap around the back of your shoulder. He pulls his mouth off you with a wet plop, giving you barely any time to react to the shivers that his warm breath against your nipple sends through you, before he is smacking open mouthed kisses up your chest, tongue running over your collarbones, until he buries his face in your nape.
Your own hands shakily move from the chair's wood that you've definitely made a dent in, to brush through his hair and glide down his back. He still has his fucking jacket on, which annoys you but also makes you moan against his shoulder because he's gonna be coated in sweat and you'll get to lick it off his body.
"Hold on tight," Jimin suddenly mumbles into your neck.
And just as you've clutched one of your hands in his jacket and wrapped the other around his neck, one of his own folds a leg of yours around his waist and the other pushes against your back to heave you off of the chair. You're barely in the air for three seconds before he presses you against the wall of the trailer, fingers digging into your thigh and nails raking a path up to the ties of your bikini bottom. When he gets there, he slips past it to grab at your ass, though, not once detaching from where he's sucking at the skin of your neck. 
"You're so fucking thick," he groans against you before pulling back to stare at you with lidded eyes. "And so fucking soft, baby."
To emphasize, his hand obscenely squeezes at your ass cheek. You jump a little, immediately whining when he chuckles at your reaction. Pulling him closer by the hand you still have around his neck, you press your crotch up against his and grind, making him hiss at the friction.
"And you're so fucking hard," you tell him in the same wonderstruck voice he used, "baby."
Not allowing him much time to react, you spin the two of you around so that he’s the one pressed up against the wall. He looks surprised but you don’t miss the jump in his throat. And now. You lean away and admire Park Jimin in all his sweaty, sexy glory. Droplets run down the line of his slender throat, settling into the hollow above his collarbones. Some escape and hang on like precious gems from his nipples. Others, the quickest of all, race down the ridges of his tight abdomen.
It is your personal mission to collect every single one on your tongue.
Pressing your bare tits up against his damp chest and ignoring the cold from his jewelry, you fuse your lips to his neck, slowly running your tongue down the corded muscles there. Jimin’s hands hold your waist, fingers digging hard every time your teeth meet his skin, in time with the whiny breaths that escape his throat. You take your sweet time lapping up the salty liquid gathered around his collarbones, relishing the flavor of his skin at every inch you cover. The two chains that fall across his clavicle get in your way, and so you shift them away with your lips to press kisses to the skin beneath them quickly, before you move downwards.
Pushing the edges of his jacket away to shove it off of his body, you swipe your tongue across both his nipples, one by one, and then follow the rivulets of sweat down his abs. At one point, you seal your lips over tight muscle and suck like a starved bitch.
“Fuck, baby, love that…”
Oh, does he? You’re gonna bite your way through his abs.
Sitting on your haunches and eventually kneeling between his legs, the smoothest course of action to take from here is focusing on the straining length right in front of your face. One of his hands is braced on your shoulder, while the other rests softly atop your head.
You look up to find his lips parted and chest heaving. Delicious. And then you pull down his pants and then his boxers in quick succession. His dick is thick, long and leaking precum. Fucking delicious.
Wrapping your lips around the angry tip, you don’t need any prompting from Jimin to swallow this gorgeous, curvy length. He meets the back of your throat with ease, massive fucker, and his fingers immediately clench in your hair.
“Like that – just like that!”
You suck on him like your life depends on it, working your mouth up and down his girth, tongue massaging the velvety skin. Jimin tries to help by guiding your head with a hand, but he’s mostly too busy groaning your name in the sexiest of tones you’ve heard him use. The sounds have the pool of arousal in your panties growing at a continuous rate. Your hands take support from his sculpted thighs, and despite the entirety of your brain being driven to worship Jimin’s dick, the firmness of the muscle in his legs still manages to register with you. 
Is this guy all muscle on bone? Given the amount of muscles you can see, he’s gotta be really fucking strong. Fuck, you just got wetter.
You go deeper, this time actually swallowing when his head is lodged in your throat, and Jimin breaks into curses.
“I’m gonna—fuck, fuck, I’m gonna fucking come—”
You grant him the littlest of refuge by decreasing the depth of penetration, but your tongue still works on him tirelessly, until you feel the guy trembling against you. That is when you bring one of your hands up to cup his balls, softly massaging the tight sacs. 
“Ahh—I – fuck, fuck, fuck – b–b–baby, plea—ah! I’m—I’m gonna—”
Biting back whimpers of pleasure that rise up your throat at the desperate mess of broken moans escaping Jimin, you pull a little away and relax your throat to push him into the constricted depth again. And you move your head on him like a maniac, having him fuck your throat because you need it as much as he does. You need him to come like this – you need his thick release flooding your mouth, rolling down your throat. You need to fucking choke on his cum the way you’re choking on his cock. You need to swallow every single drop of it.
Another knead of his balls, and Jimin is hissing your name, his body stiffened but his cock pulsing. And one – two seconds later, spurts shoot out of his length, both his hands on your head to control the force of the jerks he makes against your face. 
He doesn’t know you don’t fucking care that your nose is pressed against his pelvis because your throat is busy working the thick load of his release down its channel so that nothing leaks out of your mouth. It’s a difficult feat to achieve given how much he’s spilled, but you’re euphoric cleaning it all up.
So euphoric, in fact, that you don’t really notice when he pulls you up into a standing position and takes your lips in a messy kiss. It’s only when Jimin tangles his tongue with yours with a groan that you realize the fact that the first time you kiss those dreamy lips is with his cum coating your tongue. But if he doesn’t mind, neither do you.
But you do need to catch your breath, so you’re the first to pull away. Jimin looks at you with actual hearts in his eyes. You grin at him.
“Best suck of your life, or what?”
Rolling his eyes, he pushes you onto the bed right behind you. You fall back, spread eagle, and he climbs up your body like a predator. But his eyes hold a distinct look that you can’t place. Is this afterglow? Or was this really the best suck of his life?
“Dude.” You nudge him when he’s straddling your thighs and stroking your stomach with his tongue trapped between his teeth. “Don’t fall in love with me.”
“Too late. My dick’s already in love with you.”
Warmth floods your cheeks, at both the compliment and the callback to the first ever sentence you said to him. It still holds true, though, so you don’t protest, not even when he smirks at you.
Jimin then picks up the chain lying haphazardly across your breasts to press it against one of your nipples. And then wrap it around the nub. When you gasp in pleasure spiked pain, he pulls the jewelry away and gives the nipple a comforting suck. You hold onto his hair with a hand, the other reaching up to clutch the sheets. At the same time, he works on untying your bottoms.
The moment the crochet falls off, Jimin descends your body, pressing hot kisses down your stomach. And then he’s licking a stripe down your clean shaven mound, to slip across your clit.
“Fuck! Jimin!”
“You’re so fucking wet, what the fuck…” He groans aloud, two fingers pulling your pussy lips apart. Your breath catches at the sight of him gazing so obscenely at your wet center. “Such a tiny pussy…and it’s fucking coated with your slick, baby…”
That is the last of his audible words before his lips latch on, tongue gliding past your entrance. Your back arches clean off the bed with that first stroke, rounded lips open on a silent scream. 
“You like that?”
“Fucking love it, Jimin…”
He’s chuckling against your thigh, nose nudging at the soft skin, before his mouth is back to your folds, pillowy lips making their way through the slick skin to press a suckling kiss to your clit.
“Oh, right there!”
Jimin flicks his tongue against the nub at your gasp. “Here?”
And he’s totally messing with you now, because before you can respond, his tongue slips past your slit again, satiny soft warmth against your labia that turns into cold stiffness when it’s inside your heated channel. Then he quickly pulls out and plants a light, closed mouth kiss to the hole he just exited.
“Or here?” 
A gurgle rises up your chest at the tease, and unintelligible words tumble out of your mouth.
“Ah, what’s that, baby?” he breathes against your wetness, voice loaded with humor.
“Every… everywhere,” you manage to heave out between your tumultuous breathing.
“Fuck,” comes a hiss from him, and a hand tweaks one of your nipples while the other rearranges your body to push you further up on the bed.
Trembles run through your legs when Jimin’s hands brace against the underside of your thighs to push them apart. He delves in with teeth this time, nipping at your turgid bundle of nerves before he pushes his blunt front teeth up against its hood to allow his tongue complete, unobstructed access to wrap around your clit. And you sob, breathless and shaking, your mind a blank slate, at the precipice of exploding with blinding pleasure.
Jimin shifts his focus, then, running his teeth past your clit and making you shriek in surprised pleasure as if it's nothing, and pushes his tongue in you again. This time, he is rough and strong, plunging deep into your heat with that long tongue of his, and licking up your juices from inside of you. The motion sends your mind spiraling through a frenzy, which combined with the rhythmic bumping of his plump upper lip against your clit, has you at the brink of your release in no time.
Whimpering, you reach out to fist a hand in the tuft of his thick hair, and brace the other one on the forearm he has wrapped around your thigh. You blink down at him through crusty, wet eyelashes, moaning loudly at the lewd sight of his head pressed up between your legs. Alerted by your touch and sounds, his eyes flutter up, meeting yours across the span of your body, through the valley of your breasts. They house molten desire, thick and swirly, and all you can do is shudder uncontrollably when that gaze pushes you off the cliff.
“F–f–fuck, I’m coming, I’m—oh fuck!”
The walls of your pussy clamp down on his tongue, convulsing as they push out your juices all over his mouth, while your entire body breaks into gooseflesh, warm spasms wrecking you from head to toe under the weight of the climax that crashes into you.
Jimin licks you clean through it, and by the time you’ve stopped shaking and can recollect your brain which feels as if it has been spilled all over the place, he’s kissing his way up your body. Tongue licking a line across your lower tummy, he sucks a bruise into your waist.
“J–Jimin,” you call for him, weak and desperate, but with no idea about what you want from him.
He responds by biting into the flesh right beneath your belly-button. “I got you, baby…”
Does he? He probably knows what you want.
Slowly crawling up to hover above you on his hands and knees, Jimin entire focus is on the chain that dangles from his neck and drags up your abdomen, the small cold spherical metallic pendant cutting a line of goosebumps across your sternum, to rest snugly in your collarbones. But Jimin isn’t satisfied with that, so he moves himself a couple inches lower, rolling the metal ball down your body and running it up the slope of one of your breasts to rest it next to the bunched up bikini top he's got tucked beneath your boobs.
"Nah, this needs to go," he suddenly muses out loud, grabbing at the fabric along with your chain that’s entwined with it, and pulling them above your boobs, prompting you to raise your arms as he rolls the material away from your head.
Just as the fabric and chain combination touches your wrists, though, he stops. Tilts his head to a side to observe it, squinting at your wrists with a dark gaze, and then he does something that tightens the cloth and metal over your wrists. 
Oh. You're – oh. He's tied your hands together. They now rest against the wall above the pillow on his bed, and damn, it shouldn't be as arousing as it is. But the intensity of Jimin's stare when he scans your naked body from top to bottom has your breath catching and mouth drying up.
"Such a beautiful, beautiful body," he slowly whispers, his words condensing in the heated space between you two. One of his hands reaches up to paw at your boob, while the other grabs at the flesh on your hip. "So fucking responsive," he hisses when your nipple hardens within seconds, and swoops down to lick a wet strip across it. 
You shiver, proving his words, and blink up at him in anticipation. You must’ve released nothing short of a lake of wetness on his covers at this point, and every little ministration from him is just turning it into a sea.
Removing the hand on your hip to relocate it between your legs, Jimin brushes his finger lightly through your swollen folds. His gaze stays steady on yours, while your eyes roll into the back of your head.
"Look at all these juices this sweet pussy keeps leaking," he sighs, bringing his hand up to show you his glistening digits that you are able to focus on with much difficulty. "Soaking my fingers when I haven't even entered you yet, baby?"
He pops them into his mouth, shutting his eyes to clean them up with a lewd slurp. Then his lids part again, heavier than before, and his fingers return to your center.
"This is the pussy that's in love with me, huh?"
Surprised at the question – more like shocked at the realization that he hasn’t let go of this, yet – you gape at him cluelessly. That is all it takes for his hand to clench in a rough squeeze on your boob in punishment.
Oh fuck. Oh fuck. You're going to die if this man doesn’t fuck you soon.
"Y–yes, Jimin," you whimper.
"You were so ready to throw yourself at me outside, baby," he mocks you in a sweet voice, quite opposite to the rough thrust his fingers make inside of you at the same time. "My pretty little slut… Would’ve let me fuck her out there if I wanted… Ready to let me strip and bend her over in public because she was dripping, huh? Such a pretty little slut…”
His fingers smash against your g-spot at a bruising pace, cleansing your mind of all thoughts that don’t comprise the pressure building your abdomen, Jimin’s dark eyes and his clenched jaw. 
Tunnel visioned and unilateral minded, you do not catch the context of his next question at all: "Aren’t you?"
Your body jumps with each rough push of his index and middle finger inside of you, and your brain refuses to cooperate.
Jimin’s hand on your boob jostles you, eyebrows furrowing as if in anger, but then he clarifies, "Tell me you're my pretty little slut.”
"I–I–I’m your… your lih–little s–s–s–slut!" you struggle to formulate, brainlessly parroting his words while your eyes seal shut and tears accumulate at the corners.
"Pretty!" he admonishes, reminding you of the word you missed by twisting your nipple.
You jump, whimpering in pain but moaning in pleasure because Jimin’s warm mouth is right there to lick the sting away from the sensitive bud. Roughly swallowing past your dry throat, you frown to focus on the instructions given to you, and try again.
"P–pretty… pretty little slu–slut!"
"Whose pretty little slut?"
Oh that you do know. "Yours! Jimin's!"
"Look at you, fuck.” Jimin groans and you hear some rustling before he’s hovering over you, a hand braced next to your head, his bulging bicep next to your face and his lips skimming up your jaw. “Do you wanna come, baby?”
"Yes! Please, Jimin! Please make me come!” 
His nose nudges against yours before his tongue licks at your lower lip. “You want it that bad? What will you do for it?”
You seriously do not have any braincells left to come up with crazy promises, so you settle on, “Anything!”
“Oh? Is that so? You’d do anything to come for me?"
And you’re just nodding, accepting his kisses despite the burn in your lungs, literally risking it all to just have this knot behind your belly-button explode into a mind-blowing release.
“Should I open the doors? Invite the entire set to watch what a filthy whore we have here, hm?”
You have never in your life considered yourself to be an exhibtionist in any capacity, and so his words make your eyes flutter open in confusion. But – what confuses you more, is the sudden clench your pussy gives at the prospect, making both yours and Jimin’s eyes widen. You tug at your restraints when he grins, shaking your head to clarify that you’re not actually a whore, this is probably just an ego thing because being pressed between Park Jimin and his bed is an honor. 
But just then, he is pulling his fingers out of you with a loud squelch, leaving you shrieking, gasping, stunned – bereft. “Jimin! What—I was so clo—mmph!”
His wet fingers shut you up, sliding through your lips to settle on your tongue. Then he raises an eyebrow. “Whores don’t get to come, baby. Only good girls do.”
You try to speak with his fingers literally in your mouth and a garbled bunch of nothing comes out. Jimin chuckles.
“What? You’re a good girl, now?”
You nod your head, wide-eyed and empty-lunged. 
“Oh, sweetheart.” He presses a messy kiss to the underside of your jaw, smiling so wide, his eyes squint. “A good girl cleans up after her. You wanna be a good girl?”
Eyes rounded further, you nod harder.
“Lick my fingers clean.”
With a gusty inhale through your nose, you lick over and around his digits. Spit dribbles down the side of your mouth, but neither you nor Jimin care, your gazes trained on each other. His own mouth parts after a while, tongue resting at one corner as he slowly extracts his now clean fingers. Wow, you did a good job.
Smacking your lips, you puff up your chest and flash him a smile. But the action presses your breasts up against his chest, and Jimin snaps. Shuffling around the drawer next to the bed for a foil packet, he’s quickly covering his stiff cock in rubber. He’s so fucking hard again, you’re in love with his dick.
And then he has your thighs spread and fitted around his waist, while his strong hands press into your forearms to keep them in place above your head, and – fuck. 
His necklace is dangling between the two of you.
Swinging daintily, seductively, from his body to yours, the pendant skims your heated, sweat soaked tits with its cold, smooth surface. And Jimin watches that movement in transfixation.
“Jimin…”
“Hmm?”
“Need you to fuck me…”
His gaze slowly rises to yours, lips twisted and eyebrows lowered. “Do you, baby?”
“Yes.”
“Are you a good girl now?”
You nod vigorously. “Very good girl, Jimin.”
He pulls his bottom lip between his teeth. “Mm hm. We’ll see how good you actually are, sweetheart…” Lining himself up with a hand, he begins to push inside of you. “Tell me if it hurts.”
Catching the serious look on his face, you give a quick nod. He’s an attentive lover and it’s amazing of him to be so aware because he’s fucking huge down there. But. Right now, you think it will hurt you more if he doesn’t enter you.
Gradually inching in until his thick length is all the way in you, he moves one hand to hold onto your makeshift handcuff, while he braces the other on your ribcage, beneath your boob. And fuck, he fills you up so good. 
After he’s made one – two – three experimentive, light thrusts, he picks up pace. And then he fucking rocks your world, going hard as hell to pound against that one sensitive spot withing your channel that is normally elusive to your lovers, but this man apparently has a superpower of locating with every appendage of his. 
Sweat builds, collects and then drips down his body, as it does yours, and the entirety of the trailer seems to shake a little – but the way Jimin’s necklace dangles between you two occupies all of your focus. You stare at the strangely seductive sight, mesmerized, until the pressure in your pelvis builds again and forces you to shut your eyes.
“Ah, what’s this?” Jimin pants into your ear, flicking his tongue over the earlobe. “Are you close already?”
That sounds like a trick question, but you can’t really lie when he is literally inside of you and can feel your walls tightening. “Yes…”
“That doesn’t sound like a good girl to me, baby… Didn’t you say you were a very good girl?” He clicks his tongue, brushing his lips over yours to breathe out, “You gotta wait for me, sweetheart. Good girls wait.”
The promise of praise has your entire body locking in itself to contain the surges of pleasure from flowing to the last of your nerve endings, but it's hard. Because the way Jimin is leaning over your body makes his hips meet yours such that they press up against your clit with every stroke. 
You give up and sob, bleary eyes opening to look at Jimin’s concentrated face. “I’m very—ah! V–very close, Jimin… C–ca–can’t—”
“You can’t hold it?” he snarls, expressions morphing into one of determination. “Whores don’t get to come, remember?”
And you predict it before he even makes the move, so you dig your heels into the plump cushions of his ass, keeping him from pulling out, with a whine of, “No~o! No, please, I’ll – I’ll hold it! Promise! Just – just don’t fucking stop, Jimin!”
He nibbles on his bottom lip, forehead in a crease as he looks at you, movements slowed down but not stopped. “I really don’t wanna stop, baby,” he tells you with a pout, grabbing your jaw with his fingers digging in on one side and thumb on the other. “So you better not fucking come.” With gritted teeth, he lifts your hips off the bed and fucks you harder. “Ah shit! Look at how good you take it, fuck… Tight fucking pussy – so sweet!” 
He then buries his face in your boobs, licking up and around the globes, while you clench your eyes as tightly shut as you can, gritting your teeth to stop the fire from spreading through your body. 
After one particularly hard thrust that seems to reach your womb, though, you’re at the verge of breaking. You will either explode in an orgasm or fucking die of depravation. And so you shake your head, sobbing so hard, your tears spill on to Jimin’s hair.
“I–I–I can’t, Jimin, I really really really—please let me c–c–c–come! Please please ple~ase, Jimin—”
“Fuck, baby,” he moans against your nipple, lifting his head to look at you through troubled eyes. “You’re fucking killing me with that begging—so fucking delectable!”
You’re still blinking in bewilderment when he reaches up to pull your lips in a kiss. Teeth biting into your lip and tongue licking against yours, he pulls back within just seconds and tips his forehead against yours.
And then, in a soft whisper that feels more intimate and softer than anything you’ve shared with him so far, Jimin tells you, “Come for me, my good girl.”
Your pussy gets the message before your ears do, and it clamps down hard on his dick – making Jimin gasp with his puffy lips perfectly rounded and wide eyes looking into yours. It loosens that grip just the next moment, though, delving into a series of convulsions that churn out Jimin’s impending orgasm out of him, too. Your eyes close at some point, too lost to the electricity flowing through your veins and the explosions happening in every corner of your head. With your legs still locked around him, you both shudder through your orgasms together, twitching and whimpering for a while after the waves have rolled over and ceased.
Catching your breath is harder than you thought, and opening your eyes is something you don’t even wanna do. Jimin pulls out from you with a muted curse and you feel him leave you alone on the bed. Then, too, you keep your eyes shut, drained out of energy.
But you do open them eventually when you feel his hands untangling yours from the confines of crochet and metal. And it’s embarrassing how the sight of his naked chest, inches from you, sends a spasm through your body again– when you’ve just had your world knocked off its axis by the force of the orgasm he gave you.
“There,” Jimin tells you in a rasp, sounding fully fucked out, but just as delicious as before. “Your hands feel okay?”
You pull them down, wincing a bit at the tug in your elbow, but then nod. “Yeah, they’re okay. Thanks.”
Jimin sits back with a smirk, holding your bikini top in one hand and the jewelry you wore for the commercial in the other.
Oh, shit the commercial. 
You quickly sit up in horror, bracing a hand against your head when it spins. “Jimin, the shoot! We – we ruined our outfits… and the product…”
He offers you a bottle of water, chuckling. “Which is nothing to worry about at all. These are just samples,” he clarifies, raising the hand with your chain in it, “and I already told Jeremy to arrange for spare outfits.”
You take a few sips of water and look at Jimin in awe. You’re very tempted to ask him how regularly he does this. “You prepare for everything, huh? Impressive.”
Tossing your clothes and jewelry aside, he runs a hand through his hair – a sinfully sexy gesture that makes you sigh – and wiggles his eyebrows at you. “Almost everything. I never could’ve prepared for the sexiest woman I’ve ever laid eyes on telling me her pussy is in love with me.”
Hissing a breath out, you narrow your eyes and punch his firm bicep. Jimin just giggles and rolls away to the foot of the bed to duck. “You’re the worst, you know!”
“Ah ah – that’s not what your pussy was saying a few minutes ago!”
He’s standing up, now, correcting his pants, and you look around for something to cover yourself up. A purple hoodie lands next to you. You look at Jimin with your eyebrows raised in alarm.
“Relax, I’m not tryna be couple-y.” He rolls his eyes with a scoff. And then smiles. “Wear this until they get you a change of clothes. You look like you came here in a cab and not a trailer.”
You nod, a little bashful and a lot grateful, but very careful about your boundaries. This has been the best fuck of your life – but Jimin is still an A-lister, serial-fucking his way through the industry. 
It’d be kinda nice to be friends with him, though.
“You know for what it’s worth,” Jimin says after you’re done settling into the piece of clothing he loaned you, “I’m in love with your pussy, too.”
Nope, it won’t be nice being friends with him, at all.
Your affronted gasp echoes around the space, immediately followed by loud giggles that belong to Jimin. You toss a bottle at his head – but you’re laughing, too.
Maybe you’ll send Hoseok an actual gift basket, after this.
Damn, what a day.
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© jimilter | 2022
links to be added later!
3K notes · View notes
borahaerhy · a month ago
Note
Hi! So I saw that requests are open! I was wondering if you could make a one shot where Jungkook is your best friend and he had a crush on you and you have a crush on him but he gets jealous at a party because he sees you talking to Taehyung who is giving you advice on how to confess to Jungkook and you kiss Taehyung on the cheek as a friend and Jungkook sees this and drags you off in a drunken rampage and starts kissing you and one thing leads to another? (Kink Warnings: Edging, dirty talk, spanking, punishments, a bit of degrading?)
ABSOLUTELY
Mine - jjk
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Genre: SMUT, little fluff at the end
Warnings: Major dom/sub themes, Dom!jk, Edging, dirty talk, spanking, punishments, degrading, praise, vaginal fingering, oral (f. receiving), protected sex, possessive JK, Implied intoxication, pet names, v fluffy ending
Word count: 2.5K
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“Looks like Jungkook’s having fun,” Taehyung leaned against the wall next to you, drink in hand as he looked over to the drunk man you had been staring at for most of the night. “Any reason you’re over here and not over there?”  
“I chickened out again,” you sighed, taking a sip of the drink in your hand. Taehyung clicked his tongue, shaking his head lightly as he too took a sip.  
“Y/n, he’s literally the most oblivious man on the planet. And apparently, he’s not the only one,” You waved at him dismissively as you turned away from Jungkook to look at Tae, who already had an eyebrow cocked knowingly as he looked at you.  
“I’ve heard your theories, and frankly, I don’t believe them.”  
“Y/n, I’m telling you, that man will not shut the fuck up about you; especially while drunk,” You rolled your eyes.  
“He’s drunk right now, and he’s not talking about anything other than a game of pool,” You took another sip of your drink, crossing your unoccupied hand around your center. Taehyung shrugged as he looked over at where Jungkook had been playing.  
With a smirk on his face, Taehyung nodded his head in the direction of your drunk mutual friend. “He might not be talking about you, but since you turned away from him, he hasn’t taken his eyes off you for more than a few seconds,” You quickly whip your head around, your eyes meeting Jungkook's for a millisecond before he looks back down at the table.  
“All you have to do is walk up to him, ask him to come with you somewhere more private, and tell him how you feel.” You bit your lip as you turned back to look at Taehyung, then back to Jungkook again, still skeptical. “Or just lay one on him, I’m sure he won’t mind either way,”  
Something you hadn’t noticed, however, was how close you and Taehyung were standing to one another. 
Naturally, if you wanted to hear each other at a party of this size, you’d have to stand pretty close to one another; but Jungkook wasn't thinking about what made sense.
He was thinking about how Taehyung had that dumb smirk plastered across his face as he casually stood so close to you. The anger in him only grew as he watched you so easily talking to him; or how Taehyung would touch your arm, or how you’d laugh at something he said.  
And the worst part was that Taehyung knew.  
Taehyung knew that Jungkook had been waiting so patiently for you; had been wanting and waiting for you for 3 years to realize that he wasn’t just your best friend, but also the perfect guy for you. Taehyung knew that you were his, that you belonged to Jungkook; but for some reason, he decided that he should talk to you, touch you as if he hadn’t heard Jungkook talk about you a million times before.  
And you just let him.  
The last straw came in the form of your lips on his cheek, your hand resting on his shoulder and his on your waist to keep you steady as you kissed him.  
That’s it.  
Jungkook handed his pool stick to someone nearby, he wasn’t even sure who it was if he was honest, and made a b-line over to you.  
“Oh, Jungkook, I was just about to-” Jungkook cut you off, not really caring about what you had to say as he grabbed ahold of your wrist and dragged you away.  
Taehyung smiled as he watched you get dragged off. He, of course, knew exactly what he was doing. He knew neither of you would ever just confess to the other, so he did a little meddling. He took another drink from his cup before he kicked away from the wall and moved over to take Jungkook’s spot in his game.  
You were dragged into an empty room and the door was slammed behind you. Jungkook turned away from the door and toward you, looking at you as he locked the door, his eyes raking down your body with hooded lids as you stood almost speechless, confused at his sudden change in demeanor.  
“Jungkook, what-” 
“Shut up,” His voice was low as he stepped toward you, pressing his lips to yours hungrily. His hands pulled your hips roughly into his, your arms instinctively wrapping around his neck as your heart beat loudly in your chest. “You’re such a fucking slut,” He mumbled against you, grabbing your hair and pulling your head to the side to give him access to your neck. “Think you can just keep me in your back pocket while you fuck around with my friends, huh?”  
At this point you were genuinely confused, but even as his words confused you they turned you on as his teeth nipped at the sensitive skin at the base of your neck.  
“Tae’s just a friend, Gguk – fuck,” A deep throaty chuckle escaped his throat as he continued to move his hips against yours.  
“My friend, who just happened to be standing so close to you he could smell your perfume; don’t argue,” As if sensing your need to defend yourself, Jungkook’s hand wrapped around your throat as he moved away from your neck, looking you intensely in the eye as he urged you not to speak.  
You stood still, one hand on his chest and the other on his bicep as he licked his lips, eyes scanning you intently as his hand gently squeezed the sides of your neck. “God, you have no idea how long I've wanted to do this,” He kissed you again, still hungrily and desperate, but more gentle than last time.  
His hand leaves your neck and wraps around your waist, pulling you in against him as tightly as possible as he moved you back toward the bed. You fell back onto the bed, your arms propping you up as Jungkook stood above you.  
You looked up at him, lips between your teeth and eyes wide as Jungkook bent down in front of you, hands quick to undo your jeans and pull them down your legs. As soon as your jeans were discarded, Jungkook’s strong hands were on your waist, pulling further up onto the mattress and flipping you to lay on your stomach.  
“You’ve been very bad, Y/n,” Jungkook was on top of you, knees on either side of your hips and arms propping him to hover over you, his breath hitting your ear as he whispered his delicious sentences to you. “I think you need a punishment.”  
His hand firmly slapped your ass, quickly leaving a red print of his hand as you yelped at the sudden impact. He smirked at your reaction, his dick growing harder as he looked down at your reddening ass. He slowly moved down, bringing your hands down with him, pinning them to your back with one hand as he leaned back on your thighs – just below your ass.  
“Why don’t we do one for every year you made me wait, hmm? Go easy on you since you’re being an obedient little slut for me,” You could feel your arousal practically dripping out of you, your panties no doubt drenched as you nodded you head, not wanting to speak out of turn. “Keep count for me, love.”  
He barely got his sentence out before his hand roughly met your ass. The full force of his strength struck your right ass cheek, a bit sooner and more aggressively than you had anticipated; you practically screamed out “One!”  
Jungkook smirked again, chewing on his lip ring as his grip around your wrists got tighter as he had to hold himself back from grinding his hips into your ass. Another slap landed on your other cheek, slightly lighter than the first one, but still hard enough to take your breath away.  
“Two!” You almost forgot you were supposed to count, but quickly rectified your mistake before Jungkook could punish you further for it. Unable to hold himself back any further, Jungkook wasted no time in landing his final slap on your ass, the hardest of them all. He let out a quiet grunt as you called out the final number.  
He released your hands as his hands moved up your shirt, unhooking your bra and sliding his hands to cup your breasts as his hips ground roughly into your tender ass. His lips came in contact with the hot skin of your back as he lifted your shirt up higher and higher until he fully removed both your shirt and bra, leaving you almost completely bare in front of him.  
“Fuck, you’re so hot, Y/n” He flipped you over before he began trailing wet kissed down your sternum as his hands explored your body, skin burning with desire as his hands handled you so delicately compared to moments before.  
He pulled your underwear away from you and threw them to the ground, along with his shirt, before he came back down to meet you, his mouth roughly sucking in your clit as he pulled you by your hips to meet his face better. You moaned out loudly, one hand coming up to your mouth as the other roughly gripped onto the bedspread.  
“Don’t muffle yourself,” His low and demanding voice sending shivers down your spine as he slid a finger into your dripping cunt. “I wanna hear you moan, baby.” 
“But what if-” Another finger was added to the first and roughly thrust into you as he used his other hand to slap your thigh, gripping it tightly as you looked deeply into his dark eyes.  
“Don’t argue,” His eyes warned you not to disobey as his mouth went back down to entertaining your sensitive nub. Out of instinct, you moved your hand back up to your mouth, but quickly moved it down to the bed, gripping the bedding with both hands.  
His skilled tongue and hands moved against you rhythmically; every thrust of his fingers hitting your g-spot perfectly, every stroke of his tongue leaving you gasping for more. Your loud moans filled the room, Jungkook’s movements getting faster and more desperate with every little sound that fell from your perfect lips.  
One of your hands moved to Jungkook’s hair, pulling on the soft strands as your walls clenched tightly around his quick fingers.  
“J-Jungkook, I’m gonna-” You moaned loudly, unable to finish your own thought as the pleasure building up was becoming too much.  
“Gonna cum?” He hummed against you, speeding up his movements before removing himself from you completely, standing up off the bed as you groaned loudly from the lack of friction. He quickly rid himself of his pants and underwear, his hard long cock finally springing free, his hands immediately moving down to give himself some much-needed friction as he pulled a condom out of his wallet before throwing it back down on the pile of clothes.  
The sight of Jungkook stroking himself made you really desperate, needing to feel a release that he wasn’t giving you as he stood over you, staring down at your body with desire written all over him. Your right hand started to move down to your center, but Jungkook was fast to climb back over you, pinning your hands above your head .  
“Don’t touch yourself unless I tell you to,” His words were low and demanding as you felt the tip of his dick prod at your entrance. You bite your lip as you stop yourself from wiggling your hips against him. “Understand?” You quickly nod your head, at this point completely willing to go along with whatever he wants just to get your release.  
Your hips disobey your wishes and move against him, his tip slipping along your folds thanks to how wet you are. One of his hands moves down to your hip, pinning you down as he furrows his eyebrow, his mouth hanging slightly open as he sucks in a big gulp of air.  
“You’re such a needy little slut, huh? Just want me to slam my cock into you, make you cum all over me, hmm?” His hips were moving slowly, his tip dragging across your sensitive clit as he spoke, his eyes rolled back into his head.  
“Yes, please just fuck me,” Jungkook pulled himself off of you, leaning back on his feet as he unwraps the condom, his eyes meeting yours as he slides the condom onto himself.  
“Turn around,” You quickly shuffle, turning around and sticking your ass up, giving him a nice view of the mess he’s left. Seconds later he’s entering you, his large size stretching you out as you both let out streams of moans. “Fuck, baby, you’re fucking perfect,” His hips slowly pull out before snapping back into you, your pretty little sounds encouraging him to fuck into you harder.  
“To think I could’ve been fucking you like this all this time,” You were a mess under him, face smashed into the pillows you were gripping onto as he sped up his movements with every rough thrust into your aching cunt. “Could’ve claimed this pussy a long time ago, but you were too busy giving it to everyone but me,” His thrusts got rougher as his fingers dug into your hips, bruises already beginning to form as he pressed harder.  
“This is my pussy now, all fucking mine,” He moaned out loudly as he slapped your still red ass right over the already prominent handprint. You moaned loudly as you tried to keep your orgasm from consuming you, but you knew you wouldn’t be able to last much longer with how he was talking to you.  
“Gguk, mm gonna-” Your words barely discernable as he pounded into you ruthlessly.  
“Cum for me, baby. Cum all over my fat cock,” He reached around you and started rubbing your clit furiously, begging you to cum for him. You practically screamed out as you came, knuckles white as you gripped the pillows around you harder than you thought possible as he moved even faster into your pulsing cunt, seeking his own high.  
“Fuck, that’s so good baby, you’re so fucking good for me,” He landed one final slap to your less tender cheek as he emptied himself into the condom, moaning loudly, his movements slowing dramatically as he rode out his high.  
He collapsed next to you, pulling you into his heaving chest as he relaxed down into the bed. Tangled in each other's embrace, you both tried to regain your breath as you let it fully set in what just happened.  
Jungkook’s hand moved under your chin, bringing your face up to meet his in a soft and gentle kiss; the kind of kiss he’d wanted to be the first one you shared together. His lips moved softly against yours as he savored the way you tasted, never wanting to move from this spot with you. 
“You did so good, baby,” You blushed and looked down, suddenly very shy in front of the man you’ve had a crush on for ages. He lifted your chin up again, bringing your eyes back up to meet his before he left a soft kiss on your forehead. “C’mon, let’s get you cleaned up,”  
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aajjks · 16 days ago
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Yours forever (JJK)
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synopsis. He was forever yours, why won’t you accept that?
pairing: yan!popular boy jungkook x shy!fem reader.
warnings: soft yandere themes, obsession, unhealthy relationship, codependency, anxiety issues, severe anxiety and depression, inferiority complex.
sequel to it’s you. xx
disclaimer: THIS IS NOT A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP, DO NOT ROMANTICISE THIS BEHAVIOUR AT ALL, I do not CONDONE this behaviour at all? viewer discretion is advised, this type of content can be dark and triggering
note. pt 3? share feedback! ENJOY!
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It was not possible to deny Jeon Jungkook.
He was a great guy, surprisingly humble, funny and whatever not attractive quality did he have in him, it was surprising.
Guys like him, they should be cliché, always thinking about sex, booze and drugs.
But the only thought that occupied his mind was of yours.
Jungkook was a clingy boyfriend, it didn’t help your anxiety either, he was perfect, in every single sense.
He was too caring, he was everything a girl wanted. Who wouldn’t want him? someone stupid, crazy.
That was you.
“Baby.. how can you look so gorgeous every single time?” Jungkook never leaves your hand as you both walk together into the campus, people stare, ogle at the pairing and you feel like you want to die.
His whispered words in your ears send shivers down your spine, his face was almost nuzzled in your neck.
His hot breath making you shiver. Jungkook was physical, his hands always on your waist, around your shoulder, his lips on your neck or your lips.
It was like he couldn’t ever get enough of you. Like you were his need, that needed to be filled every single minute.
It wasn’t like you didn’t enjoy the way he loved you so much, the way he was so willing to show it too, you liked his attention.
You just didn’t like the attention that people gave you because of him.
Like right now, his hand is tightly holding yours as he rubbed it, the thing about Jungkook that made you so weak for him was that he eased your anxiety.
He made you feel enough, more than so.
But you still heard the hushed whispers.
“can you believe that someone like jungkook is with a loser like her? Oh my god… tragedy.” Your heart thumped, your stomach churned,
You hated this feeling.
“Baby you okay?” Jungkook’s voice called your name out twice.
“Huh? A-Ah yeah. I’m okay.” You blinked at him, Jungkook looked at your face with pure adoration, his eyes swam in the love they held for you.
Fuck, you felt so overwhelmed.
“Jungkook please excuse me… I need to use the rest room…” you removed his hand from your waist, asking him politely trying to mask the shakiness in your time.
Jungkook hand didn’t budge for a moment. You looked up at him and saw a flash of obsession in his eyes, but before you could observe his aura, it disappeared.
He hesitated to remove his hand.
“Okay baby, go.”
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The cold water hit your face and blinked again and again to calm down your nerves,
You were almost losing your composure. Your heart was heavy like you were carrying a baggage, you sighed out a deep breath.
Being with Jungkook was too much for you.
It was funny really. How you were so unstable enough to handle a relationship with a great guy, you hated yourself.
Jungkook was perfect to you, so loving it hurt your brain.
So why couldn’t you reciprocate his feelings? Your mind made you realise every single second that you didn’t deserve jungkook.
That Jungkook didn’t deserve someone like you.
“Ahhh fuck fuck fuck.” You cried looking into the mirror, your face void of any makeup, your lips dry and chappy, even your hair was a mess.
Gosh, you were a mess.
“I can’t do this!” You were looking absolutely pathetic.
How pathetic yn. Your own brain mocked you.
The tap water was running until you realised and snapped back to the reality.
You needed to break up with jungkook.
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“BABY! I was so worried about you.” His voice was so familiar, you didn’t look back as you kept walking away.
“Y/N baby! Why are you avoiding me?” He panted, you could hear it as his figure quickly caught up with you,
Shit.
His hand quickly pulled your body towards him before you could even look at him. “Y/N what’s wrong baby?” That sweet tone of his made you feel sick.
You didn’t like the way he called out your name so sweetly.
“Baby please talk to me! You avoided me the whole day in the campus! And now you left early too!” He stopped, you had to too, his hand grabbed your face and his eyes borrowed into yours.
Dark orbs staring right into your soul.
“Jungkook please leave me! I-I don’t want you to be with me.” You dismissed his hand away. “And why did you bunk your class?” You argued.
“Baby! Don’t be like this please! I-I love you.” He huffed, caressing your face gently. You wanted to stop him, but the look of vulnerability in his eyes made your heart ache suddenly.
This was scary.
“I-I sensed your anxiety and I wanted to be with you to make sure you were okay….” He whispered, his words hypnotic as his touch comforted you.
He was so perfect.
“I love you Y/N… please don’t leave me.” It was like jungkook knew your intentions, you gasped in surprise at his words.
“I know Y/N… you don’t love me.” His lips wobbled. “But it’s okay… please let me love you, allow me to love you from all my being…” he had a glossy look in his eyes.
“Please let me love you. My love for you is enough for both of us…. I am nothing without you. I feel so suffocated without you..
“I’m yours forever.”
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jjungxkook · 20 days ago
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never be friends | jjk
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⇥ pairing: best friend!jungkook x reader
⇥ genre: best friends to lovers, fluff, crack, suggestive
⇥ rating: 18+ bc of their convos<3
⇥ warnings: swearing, convos kind of suggestive, constant cute bickering, jk’s lip ring, bit of jealousy, kissing and making out💋 + confessions ig
⇥ wc: 3k
⇥ author’s notes: henlo, this is my first fic on here and i was just trying out my writing with this short one, so it might not be that great yet, sorry!! better things to come but i still hope it’s okay😗
⇥ summary: A healthy mix of irritation and amusement leads to kissing and making out with your best friend. Everyone knows that.
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The crowd seems to tense more whenever you blink.
With each passing second, there’s another inebriated, blabbering individual who’s clinging onto Jungkook’s neck. How he’s not suffocating yet is beyond your understanding.
Like vultures, they surround the couch you sit on, drinks in hands that they spill, cheeks warm. The craze in their eyes spins like a spiral. You think you hear sounds roaming the jungle this house has become. Wild growls, hisses and rustling of leaves.
Somewhere in the background, infiltrating your poor eardrums.
Alright.
It’s not his fault he’s popular around campus.
And maybe you’re exaggerating– maybe you’re just not used to the new torture that’s been plaguing your sick head for weeks. Always when you’re with Jungkook, though.
“What’s wrong?”
His arm coils its way back behind you, slinging around your shoulders. The ink-free hand squeezes your arm and you finally open your mouth to scold him like you’ve been wanting to all night.
“I thought you forgot I’m still here,” you say, arms folded in front of your chest.
“Why would I forget you?”
“You’ve been busy talking to college girls and jocks.”
“Why don’t you talk to college girls and jocks, too, then?”
The devious smirk doesn’t match the sweet glint in his eyes.
They’ve been a problem for a while now, those dark circles in the middle of his eyeball. Very cute and caring. Incredibly beguiling. Pied-piper-style, they sing you to his touch.
Also, it’s hard to avoid staring at the pink vibrancy of his lips.
“I’m here because you invited me?” You explain. You’re trying to push his touch on your arm to the back of your brain very hard.
“But?”
“But I feel like decoration next to you!”
He laughs at your vexation. There’s something about the frown that makes him fonder of you than he already is. Probably because that’s how your friendship started out. With a frown, a cute affront and a big, fat grin.
Things don’t change. And his unabashed, oblivious remarks seemingly do not change, either.
“You’re the prettiest deco,” Jungkook says. He smiles when you click your tongue. Then bursts into laughter when you roll your eyes. “I would put a hundred of you in my apartme– Hey!”
You shake off his arm and stand, pushing your ass off the couch with a sigh. The party gets louder, like the sounds were muffled on the soft cushions where you resided so far.
Bored out of your mind, of course.
Eyes flitting through the busy room, you stomp to the exit. You know a man on two wobbly legs is following you, even if you can’t hear his steps through the blasting of the music.
The hallway is worse, a lot more claustrophobia-inducing, but the staircase is not. Surprisingly, most of the campus is gathered on the ground floor, and you are already internally praying for Hobi’s future.
May all the vases in his house stay intact as well as his bones once his roommates return.
“Where’re you goin’?” The voice behind you asks, stretching each word.
“For a walk.”
“In Hoseok’s house?”
“Did you know that,” you start speaking. You stop to scour the wall for the light switch, blinking rapidly when light floods the hallway. “I’ve never really taken in much of his place?”
“Now’s the time for it then?”
You nod. You don’t ever look at him. He’s right beside you, hands tugged in the pockets of his black cargo pants. Flipping his hair aside, he lets his eyebrows breathe. You remember when he still had his curved barbell pierced around his right eyebrow.
You’d say you miss it, but the ring decorating his plush lower lip distracts you thoroughly, all the time.
“Why are you being jealous?” He then asks out of the blue.
Pausing your steps, you turn your head toward him. Eyes wide, you let your mouth drop open, questioning his audacity with your tongue poking the corner of your lips.
“What would I be jealous of?”
“Not what, but who.”
“Who would I be jealous of?” You repeat. A broken record, but the other times, the question was in your head.
You’re comical, Jungkook thinks. And so fucking cute.
“Well, you tell me. It’s not me who’s envious about others sucking my d–” he sing songs, but you interrupt with an annoyed Shhh.
His eyebrow is cocked, and he seems to know something that… Well, you know, too.
“Dude, you can’t just–”
You plant your fists on your hips and tilt your head. Lips pressed together tight, you blink at him. He doesn’t answer right away, but when he does, he sounds amused, and you hate to admit that his constant joy and teasing are kind of… sexy.
“What?”
He takes a tiny step forward, lightly slapping one of your fists off your hips.
“Listen… bro.”
You say it casually but his eyes light up with a newfound irritation. ‘Course – boys don’t like that term, even if it comes from their super platonic, super non-crush-best friend. Poor ego.
“I’m not playing your sick games,” you finish.
“Hey, hey, hey!” He exclaims, wiggling a warning finger as if it could affect you anyhow. “Call me bro one more time.”
“Or what?”
His eyes squint and a hum vibrates across his chest. Seemingly lost in thought, you think he’ll threaten you with a stupid, harmless bet like he used to in high school.
No calling me stupid until the end of the school day. You owe me five bucks every day for the rest of the week if you lose.
But instead–
“I’ll tell everyone you have a crush on me and want to suck my d–”
“No!” You barge in again, reaching for his wrist. “That’s how rumors are made!”
Of course, he doesn’t stop there, though.
“Okay. But. Is it a rumor?”
Wow. Okay, not cool.
It’s not like you avoided him for weeks just to free yourself from these emotions. Only accepting his invitation to tonight’s house party because he asked so nicely. No, not at all.
You gnaw on your lips hard, almost bloody and he has the goddamn audacity to look down at them. His eyes aren’t so innocent anymore. The little focused pout he sports when you study at the library isn’t there anymore.
What remains behind his gaze is a snarling jungle animal, infected by the crowd downstairs, yearning for your taste. Never wanting to be friends again. Or so you think. Hope.
“What d’you want me to say?” You mumble. Your words are kinda inaudible, but Jungkook hears them.
“I wanna know why you’ve been acting so weird lately.” Ah shit. The question you feared the most. “Do you realize how long it’s been since I saw you last time?”
Yeah. You remember. In fact, you think you could calculate the minutes and seconds you spent apart.
“Uh…”
“Exactly twelve days. Any explanation as to why you’d avoid me like that?”
Hello? Where’s common decency?
Because shaking up your heart this hard, like it’s a tambourine, does not seem decent to you. Very unsolicited. The butterflies are annoying.
Twelve days without the urge to kiss him. Or at least, without making it your main priority and your most vivid thought.
And what started the turbulent storm of feelings after all these years of silent, harmless pining?
One sentence when you went out for lunch.
”I feel like I’m annoying you more than usual,” he said. You were using a very specific way to eat your meal today. A little desperate.
“No, it’s not you,” you promised him. “I’m just tired. Fuck studies.”
“Fuck studies for real.” He watched you fill your mouth with a generous bite of your food, looking at the way your cheek bulged at the action. “When’s the last time you cuddled with someone? Or had sex?”
You nearly spat out your food, choking a little. As you caught yourself, eyes teary, you shook your head, and at some point, you could finally speak again.
“What the fuck kinda question is that, Jeon?”
Not that you weren’t open with your best friend. But such a crude inquiry should’ve come with a warning.
“I just think it’d do you some good.”
“Can’t believe you,” you told him in shock, even though the quiet giggle in your words betrayed you. “Find me someone then.”
“Bet.”
He shrugged his shoulders, back to the regularly scheduled programming as he dug into his lunch. Casually, he said something else, and you remember the way your eyes almost popped out of their shelters.
“If we weren’t the way we are, I’d just get you home and wrap you in a blanket. Sex or not… Either way, I think I know how to make you feel good again.”
There was filth in his confession. But most of all, there was comfort in it, too. It wrapped its hand around your throat and heart, hasn’t let go since.
The possibility to feel that with your best friend. The man you’ve built internal domestic, coarse, sweet scenarios with. It won’t let your heartbeat relax.
“I was busy,” you finally answer, snapping out of your trance.
“Lies,” he immediately retorts. “It’s even been ages since you slept over at my place.”
Haunting, those memories, even if they happened just a month ago.
Whenever you spend the night at his, he lets you occupy his bed. He pulls out a mattress or, on lazier days, stretches out on the living room couch. But he never ignores your comfort. So you feel ungrateful when you answer him, even though it makes him laugh nevertheless.
“You get up way too early. I can’t sleep in when you wake up the moment a single bird chirps outside.”
“What an unfair excuse!” He defends, but he laughs it off still. “You’re always the most productive on those days.”
“Let’s not talk about how often I collapse back on the mattress then.”
The back and forth of your taunts is standard between you. Only this time, he seems a little more endeared by you.
“You’re so adorable when you do that, I gotta say,” he coos, out for your own heart.
“Can you not!”
You press at his chest and you think he stiffens it for a second. You feel his heartbeat and the nipples under his shirt– very contrasting feelings course through your veins.
“Okay, okay. Listen…” Jungkook’s soft hand grazes your knuckles. Your eyebrows furrow deep at your favorite comfort touch. “Would you believe me if I told you I kinda missed you?”
You would. Because you did, too.
“Why? You seemed like you had a lot to do. As much as tonight,” you still remark.
“Girl, how? I had my arm around your shoulder like, eighty percent of the time. Know why?”
You lift one shoulder and let it drop fast. He waits.
Then, you shake your head, intimidated by a stare that really shouldn’t faze you anymore. He’s been your friend for far too long now to cave into his mocking antics. And yes, you’re sure it will be just another mock.
At least that’s what you think. But instead he brings his fingers to your face, and you side-eye his tattoos as he pinches your cheek.
“Because my focus is always on you.”
Air knocked out of your lungs, you keep playing dumb. This moment might not come again. Or maybe… Maybe you think. It could lead to what you’ve been awaiting half your life.
“Why?” You prod, curious and playfully stupid.
“You know why. Don’t make me spell it out because… I made it clear at our last lunch date.”
Date?
“Did you?” You ask.
“Come on. I knew you didn’t get it, it’s why I invited you tonight. It’s not my fault people were distracting me.”
You huff out a breath, your face disguising your anticipation in ridiculing grimaces. “Just say it again then. Why am I here tonight?”
“Because… You know, I mean it. Because I missed you. You were gone too long and I had those crazy withdrawal symptoms and all, y’know?”
When you laugh this time, it’s genuine, and the jocular heaviness of the situation falls by a fraction. “Did you now?”
“I really did, okay?” He argues, his voice louder. “I wanted you here tonight ‘cuz I wanted to tell you something. But know what?” He shrugs. “I think I’ve changed my mind.”
“Huh?” Hope shatters when he finishes his sentence. And inside you, the urge to finish him multiplies. “That’s unfair! Say it.”
“Or what?”
You attempt to move away, a tactic of yours to make him give in without begging for an answer. Wriggling out of his steadfast grip, you step sideways, but he pulls you back and his body closer to yours.
You hold your breath in, lips parted. Surprise takes over your face. His eyes scan and analyze your frozen stance.
“I’d like to show you instead of telling you. Is that okay?” He asks.
Is it really okay? The closeness? What he’s saying? Or that his focus always lingers on you?
You gulp.
You flatten your palm against his pecs. They’re hard and easy to feel, even over his white, plain shirt. He leans in and glances down at your lips. Slowly repeats his question nonchalantly but temptingly. “And this? Okay too?”
Quiet and mesmerized, you let your nervous breathing talk when your tongue can’t. You notice you’re still scowling when he moves forward and you backward. Right against the cold wall of the hallway…
“You look like you want to kill me,” he jokes.
“I feel like you’re out for that.”
“C’mon party pooper. Your anger is dulling my mood.” You roll your eyes, mhm-ing and bringing your eyebrows back to kiss. He chuckles again. “I’m kidding. I think you could punch me in the balls and I’d still want you.”
Huh?
Uh.
What the hell did he just say?
Your confusion-riddled expression gives away your emotions before you can stutter your question. It seems that he’s just waiting for you to spit it out, his fingers around your arm relaxed but holding you in place.
“You… What now?”
“Don’t be like that,” Jungkook reprimands. “Don’t let me irritate you all the time.”
“I’m not irritated by you, it’s just…”
You’re scrambling for words at this point. No matter what you say, your true emotions and intentions have already been revealed to him. No point in denying more than you need to.
“What, buttercup?” He whispers.
Ughhhhhh.
“Just… Sick of this whole BFF bull,” you admit.
“Ah. Okay. So?”
“Jeon Jungkook.” You sigh, digging your hands into his shirt and crumpling up the cotton fabric. “Can you please just kiss me?”
That’s it, you think. Permitting him to do just that must have been the last bit for him to break. “Goddamn,” he only mumbles.
He bites his lip, and the joy brings some of the sparkle back into his eyes. The distance closed, his mouth collides with yours. He smells like cologne and soap, tastes like cherry and flowers.
You don’t exactly know what flowers taste like, but you imagine that’s how a gorgeous, colorful bouquet would melt on your tongue if you ever tried.
Because, what the hell.
Your befuddled brain turns into a cloud when he opens your mouth in the middle of the kiss. He inhales a deep breath and sighs into you warm. His hand plants against your cheek and pushes your face up, heads tilting as he breaks through the seam of your lips.
His tongue is hot and thirsty when it meets yours. The tip of it tries you out, careful at first before he dives back into the seething make out session in this hallway at this stupid party.
The lip ring touches you cold until your saliva warms the steel… Your blood is fizzling.
A stifled moan breaks against you. His voice is deeper than ever before, different from the soft lullaby-like tunes he usually speaks in. The heat of the moment steams your lungs and then slowly moves down to your stomach.
That’s where your heart is pounding, twirling and bursting right now.
His entire body pushes against you, crotch firm and bulged against you. More prominent when he pushes one of his legs between your thighs. Uh-oh.
When he’s done, he’s still holding your face. His lips, stagnant breathing falling out of his mouth, skim the skin of your face. Along your cheekbone, to your earlobe, a light peck to your neck.
Then, he suddenly chuckles, and as if with a snap, the lights in your brain turn on again. You’re still panting and a bit disoriented. Super delighted when he lifts his face and flashes the prettiest lopsided smile you’ve ever seen.
“Fucking finally,” he whispers.
“That was…”
“Did you like it?”
“I… Did I like it?” You tug at the hem of his shirt, possibly stretching out and ruining the material. He sucks in a breath when your fingers dig deeper, traversing the barriere that his clothes are, and brush his back. “Can you please do it again?”
His lips are still wet from the making out when he leans back. They look so pretty like that, rosy and sweet, smiling just for you. But his utterances…
“What do I get for that?”
However, you’re one step ahead this time.
“Anything you want,” you let him know. Your voice is confident and hushed.
“Oh-ho-ho,” he smirks, chuckles, then clicks his tongue. “Anything I want is a dangerous offer, babygirl, it might just backfi–”
“Stop being annoying before I go back to calling you bro.”
“Don’t you dare.”
“Try me.”
“That’s… that’s kinda hot.”
Those little confessions, if his kiss didn’t already, might be delivering the biggest proof for what’s happened just now. The friendship you cherished is over. Time to indulge in other better things.
Jungkook tangles his fingers with yours, and then says…
“Let’s go back. Gotta say bye to everyone and leave… and I promise I’ll let you sleep in this time.”
hi hi!!! i have not written in a long time so please let me know if you liked this!!! thank yew and byeee<3
2K notes · View notes
borathae · 4 months ago
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“Jungkook has been your best friend ever since he can remember. You have been Jungkook’s best friend ever since you can remember. The two of you share every secret and ever since high school you even share an apartment. One day Jungkook confesses his probably biggest secret to you. He is a virgin and hellbound on changing that. Together you make up a plan on getting him laid. Problem is, you are pretty sure that you are head over heels in love with him.”
Pairing: Artist!Jungkook x Painter!Reader 
Genre: bf2l!AU, Roommates to Lovers!AU, Romance, Fluff, Smut 
Warnings: so much yearning in the beginning, unrequited feelings but are they really?, lotsa plot, virgin!Jungkook, shy!Koo, experienced!Reader, loss of virginity, oil massages, boobie fondling, oral (m. & f.recieving), fingering, multiple orgasms (m.recieving), protected sex, Kookie tries to dirty talk but is a lil clumsy with it, it’s so endearing :(, he is also so eager to learn, this is just pure feel good smut
Wordcount: 20.2k
a/n: This was not supposed to escalate to such lengths but it did and I know it’s long, but please give it a chance I promise you it is so, so worth it! Also sidenote: with each Jungkook I create I think that this is my peak and yet each time I prove myself wrong and cry because Jungkook is the sweetest man and you can’t convince me otherwise 😔🤍 
~ To Index ~
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"I know one!" Jimin exclaims, lifting his hand. 
"Go ahead", Yoongi allows him. 
"Okay so, it's gonna be easy because we need to get this party started and we can’t keep not drinking booze. So", he takes a deep breath, "never have I ever made out with someone." 
"Dude that's so easy", Taehyung says, taking a sip. 
One by one they all take a sip, shaking their heads in disbelief of how easy Jimin’s was. You take a sip as well. 
Sudden silence. All of you stare at one person in the room. 
Jungkook. 
Red cheeked and fidgeting, he hasn’t taken a sip yet. 
He looks up for only a second then looks at his lap. 
"Did you-", Seokjin starts only to be interrupted by Jimin. 
"Never have I ever kissed someone." 
One by one you all lift your cups to your lips to drink. Everyone except Jungkook, who is lowering his head even more. 
"No way", Jimin murmurs, "you didn’t even kiss?"
"N-no?" he stutters.
"Not even for a second, like a little mwuah?"
Jungkook shakes his head. 
"Not even a peck? An accidental brush of lips?" 
"W-why is this so important?" Jungkook stutters, cheeks beet red and eyes glassy. He always gets glassy eyes when he is embarrassed. One time he even cried, you felt really bad for him when that happened.
"It's not, I just figured that you kissed someone before." 
"Yeah well", he lowers his eyes again, "I didn’t." 
The silence which follows is heavy in awkwardness. Hoseok coughs. Namjoon clears his throat loudly. 
"Anyways!" you say, "I have the next one. Never have I ever stolen something." 
You hope that this would be enough to shift their attention. It is. 
"It was gum, I was ten", Yoongi says, taking a sip. 
"I stole pens from school", Taehyung admits and drinks. 
"Dude I just straight up forgot to take it out of my bag", you say and take a sip. 
Namjoon also drinks but he doesn’t give any further information. 
"Never have I ever punched someone", Seokjin says next. 
Only Jungkook drinks. 
"Seriously dude? You've never kissed someone before but you punched someone?" Jimin asks in a squeaky voice, "how does that work?"
You know why Jungkook drank, because you were involved when it happened. It was the first semester of college, late November. You and Jungkook had been living together for a little over seven months, but you've known each other longer. As a matter of fact you knew each other well enough to consider each other best friends. It was a Friday when it happened. Like always, Jungkook stayed home while you went out partying. It was fun, you danced a lot and drank even more. The music was good, the vibes were great and you made out with a dude on the toilet. It was all great and fun up until your other best friend - Jennie - told you that she would leave for the night to get dicked down by this massive jock she met. You wished her lots of fun and told her to stay safe and then stayed another hour. You felt tired after that hour, so ready for bed and so you called Jungkook to ask him if he could pick you up to which he said yes. You waited outside the club. Alone, wearing too little clothes (which, thinking back, is no excuse), way too drunk and therefore vulnerable. That is when this guy came up to you. A little bit older than you, visibly sober and very much into the deep cleavage your shirt had. He was friendly at first and because your guards were down from booze, you continued the conversation. Until all of a sudden he began touching you. Your arm first then your neck and suddenly you had his hand on your tit and his knee between your legs. You tried to fight him off but he was strong and clear in his head while you were tired and so dizzy you could barely stand. You visibly struggled, fighting him as best as possible.
That's when Jungkook arrived, parking the car across the sidewalk and jumping out of it without even bothering to turn it off or close the door. He just stormed up to the man, ripped him away from you and punched him so hard across the face that he drew blood. You will never forget how angry he looked, how big he made himself and how the veins in his neck were pulsating from tensing so tightly. You will also never forget the words he spat with poison in his voice. 
"You piece of shit asshole, touch her again and I will break your fucking hands." 
That was the first and last time you heard him swear.
The man tried to fight Jungkook, but that earned him another punch and then another as Jungkook made sure to hurt his ribs as well. 
"Now stay down", he spat, towering over the groaning man. 
That was also the only time you witnessed Jungkook's real anger. 
Normally he is quite calm in showing his anger. He either falls quiet and sulks for hours or he whines and complains about whatever is bugging him nonstop. But that night he was scary and didn’t act like Jungkook at all and yet somehow you felt safe in his presence because you knew that he had your back. 
You grew even closer that night and Jungkook promised you that he will always protect you.
That was three years ago and Jungkook and you were still sharing an apartment. Just this spring you moved to a bigger space with its own atelier and a really big bathtub. It was truly a dream come true for both of you. 
Said apartment is the current location of tonight's game and drink night. All your friends are here and the vibes were awesome.
"Yes, I punched someone", Jungkook says, sneaking a glance your way, "and I'd do it again." 
You lower your gaze, feeling your heart flutter for only a second. 
"Damn for a moment there I was attracted to you", Hoseok jokes, sending a row of laughter through all of you. 
"I have the next one then. Fitting to the theme. Never have I ever gotten punched", Namjoon says. 
Nobody drinks. 
"Okay damn, that was a fail. I thought Jimin would drink." 
"Me? Excuse me? Why?" he gasps. 
"Cause, didn’t you sleep with a married woman once?" 
"That was one time and I didn’t know she was married", Jimin defends himself. 
You cackle. 
The night continues with friendly bickering and silly questions. The mood is easy, the vibes are great and Jungkook seems less nervous as well. Until Taehyung asks the age old question of "never have I ever had a threesome." 
That is when all the sex questions began. Questions about all sorts of positions. Questions about all sorts of kinks. Questions about all sorts of fluids or sounds. It was truly eye opening and you found out a few very disturbing details about your friends' sexlife. The most fascinating thing however was that Jungkook didn’t drink at any of the questions. Not even one. 
So Hoseok sneaks a glance at him, the rest of you follows. 
"Never have I ever had sex", he asks. 
Jungkook, who had very clearly felt your eyes on him, lifts his cup and drinks with his cheeks ruby. 
All of you follow suit.
"So you wanna tell me you didn’t kiss nor make out with someone, but you had sex?" Namjoon asks. 
"I did! I had sex!" Jungkook insists loudly, furrowing his brows in seriousness. 
"And yet you didn’t even drink when we talked about all that kink stuff", Seokjin says. 
"That's b-because I don’t like that stuff", Jungkook stutters, touching his ears. 
Oh he was lying. He was lying like a champ. 
"So what do you like?" Taehyung asks. 
"Many stuff. Yeah", Jungkook nods his head, "really nasty sex stuff." 
"Mh-hm nasty sex stuff. Like spitting, slapping, choking?" 
"Yeah sure, totally did that and liked it."
"Or scratching and biting?" 
"Love that", Jungkook insists, nodding his head vigorously. 
"Yeah? Golden Showers?" 
"Golden Showers. Mhm yeah, pretty. Very great stuff", it is very clear that he has no idea what that was. 
Hoseok and Taehyung snort, exchanging a knowing look. 
"Wow, you’re kinkier than me", Seokjin says and nudges Jungkook's arm, "Jeon Jungkook the man who hasn’t kissed but let's someone piss on him", he teases.
"What? Piss?" Jungkook squeaks, "I, I mean", he blushes, "totally yeah", he says, lowering his voice to sound cooler. 
The guys chuckle and continue with the game. For the rest of the night Jungkook is quieter, seemingly lost in whatever haunts his mind. 
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They leave at eleven, saying their goodbyes and thanking you for being amazing hosts. You did the farewell as Jungkook hid in the kitchen and cleaned the counters. You know that this was him sulking. 
"See you guys", you call after them. Taehyung gives you one last wave and then disappears down the stairs. 
You close the door and lock it, making your way to the kitchen afterwards. 
Jungkook is standing by the rubbish bin, throwing away each empty beer can singularly. His eyes were zoned out. 
"So that was great", you say. 
Jungkook turns his head. 
"Yeah, it was", he agrees, voice monotone and quiet. 
"Are you feeling alright?" you ask him. 
"Of course I do", he assures you and forces a smile to his lips, "just tired."
"Yeah? Because you seem like something is bothering you." 
Jungkook throws away the rest of the cans and walks back to the counter to get the rest. 
"I'm okay", he very obviously lies. 
"Jungkook", you say his name with seriousness in your voice, "what’s really going on?" 
"I'm not ready to talk about it. Can we leave it at that?" 
So it's serious. 
"Yes of course, just come to me when you're ready." 
"Mhm", he lets out and leaves the kitchen afterwards. 
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Saturday. Four thirty. The sun is shining into your atelier and the windows are open to let in fresh air. Traffic is quiet today. Music is playing through your bluetooth speakers. It’s the artist you and Jungkook always listen to when you paint. Cigarettes After Sex. Very great band, also good music to fuck to but you never told Jungkook about that thought. 
Speaking of Jungkook. He is currently with you, sitting at his desk and drawing in his sketchbook. Every now and then you can hear the distinct sound of him using the eraser before the barely audible scribble of the pencil replaces it again.
You are painting. You finally found inspiration to finish this one piece for school. The theme should be Evanescence and you struggled a lot with finding the right motive and colours. Today the process feels easy however, which was great. 
"Okay but seriously", Jungkook's voice cuts through the comfortable silence, startling you slightly. 
You sneak a glance his way. 
He is looking at you, having his brows furrowed. 
"Why is it so bad that I never kissed someone before?" 
You stop painting, straightening up before turning to face him. 
"This comes outta nowhere." 
"Yeah well, I wanna talk about it because it annoys me how you guys belittled me." 
"Hey, don’t pull me into this. I didn’t belittle you. I couldn’t care less about it." 
"Yeah well, still", he lowers his head because he is getting embarrassed, "whatever, forget about it", he murmurs and begins drawing again. 
Judging from his hand movements he is staying on the same spot, drawing one single line over and over again. Which means he is only pretending to draw. 
"Sooo", you begin, "you really haven’t kissed anyone before?" 
He stops drawing, sneaking a glance your way. His cheeks are slowly but surely turning red. 
"Is this really so bad?" he asks, sagging his shoulders. 
"Nah, you’re alright", you assure him.
He touches his ears, swaying from side to side. 
"And you had sex before?" 
"Of course I did, you know me. I am a busy bee." 
"Okay but please tell me the logistics of this. Making out beforehand is literally the best shit about sex. Or like sloppy kisses during sex. How on earth do you fuck people without ever kissing them?" 
"It works. It really does, yeah", he insists, nodding his head vigorously, "you just gotta be uhm… really creative." 
"Mh-hm really creative. Like peeing on people." 
His cheeks are bright red, the tip of his nose too. 
"Yeah totally, that’s an option", he says, touching his burning cheeks. 
"Oh cut the crap Kook. I know you’re lying." 
"I'm not! I'm really not", Jungkook insists with big eyes. 
"You are a terrible liar. Always have been." 
He drops his hands from his face and sags his shoulders. 
"Fine, I didn’t know what Golden Showers are. I don’t like pee." 
"And?" you stress. 
"And I didn’t do all the other stuff too." 
"And?" 
He sighs, lowering his head. 
"I'm a virgin", he whispers, hiding his face behind his hands immediately. 
It was very obvious to you that he is. In those four years of living with him you have not seen him with a girl once. And you know that he didn’t talk to girls in high school either so he couldn’t have lost it there. It was obvious to you that he was in fact a virgin, but hearing it out loud still does things to you. Like make your heart flutter and your stomach tingle. 
It is a very confusing feeling because you are looking at your best friend here and you are pretty sure that fluttering hearts and tingly stomachs are not reserved for best friends. 
You push the feelings down as best as possible.
"There's no shame in that. It’s totally cool", you assure him and begin painting again.
"No it's not, it’s embarrassing. I'm a twenty four year old virgin. This is so embarrassing." 
You stop painting and look at his blushing face.
"Dude, you’re literally alright", you tell him, "do you even know how many people are still virgins in their twenties? Thirties even?" 
He shakes his head. 
"Many, thousands. It’s more common than you think. It’s society who is fucked up. Like telling young kids, children, that they need to have their first sex with like fifteen, sixteen years old and if they don’t they're automatically a loser? That's fucked up." 
Jungkook looks at you. 
"We aren’t even really developed at that age and yet it's expected of us to do something so grown-up and mature. Nah, I lost my virginity when I was fifteen and it was the worst day of my life. It hurt and was really uncomfortable because I didn’t know any better and didn’t know my body yet." 
"You did?" 
"I did and I am a passionate advocate for waiting until you are ready and then having a really nice experience with someone because you’re mature enough to know what you want. And if that means you’re gonna get your first lay at age thirty six then so fucking be it." 
"But...I don’t wanna wait until I'm thirty six", Jungkook whispers. 
"That's aight too, just do it whenever you feel ready." 
"I wanna do it now. A-at twenty four. I-I wanted it since I was twenty two", he confesses. 
"Mhm I get you. Have you tried hooking up with someone?" 
"No?" he cringes, "you know that I didn’t." 
"Well, should I help you set up a dating profile? Dating apps are the real deal to get laid. I met so many guys through that." 
"I-I never tried that." 
"Yeah? Wanna try it?" 
He nods his head, hiding his face behind his hands again. 
So you and him spend the rest of your day setting up Jungkook's dating profile.
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Jungkook cackles beside you, making you lift your head from your phone. 
"What's so funny?" you ask him. 
"Oh, it’s Valerie. She just told me a funny story", Jungkook says and begins typing his answer. 
"Ah", you murmur and look back into your phone, clenching your jaw as you do. 
Valerie is the girl he met on the dating app. They haven’t met yet and have only been talking for two weeks, but Jungkook says that she is very nice and pretty. And for some fucked up, confusing reason you feel a weird twinge in your chest whenever he mentions her. 
"Oh god", he gasps. 
"What's wrong?" 
"She just asked me if I wanna meet up later. Oh fuck what should I do?" 
Block her. Is the first thing you think of. 
"Tell her yeah sure", you say instead, tasting sourness on your tongue. 
"Okay okay. I will", Jungkook says and begins typing, "oh I'm excited, maybe tonight will be the night", he giggles. 
You feel your stomach tighten uncomfortably.
"Yeah.." you press out, grinding your teeth. 
Valerie isn’t the only girl he met. In the course of the last month he met up with ten girls, eleven if we count in Valerie. They chat for a little then one of them asks for a meet up and then you have to tell Jungkook goodbye as he leaves for his potential First Time. He always looks very handsome when he leaves but comes home looking defeated to tell you that tonight wasn’t the night. 
"Nice! She said to meet in an hour. Oh crap! I gotta get ready, shave and clean and everything", he babbles before rolling off the couch and running to the bathroom. 
"Tzt", you scoff, punching a pillow when you know he can’t see you anymore. 
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He is ready to leave after forty minutes. Looking way too handsome in his white tee and ripped jeans. 
"Okay I'm going. Wish me luck", he calls out. 
"Luck!" you call out, "or whatever, I hope you don’t get laid", you whisper because you know he can’t hear you. 
"Bye!" 
"Bye!" you call out happily all whilst grinding your teeth.
The door closes and you are all alone, left brooding in those confusing emotions.
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Jungkook returns in the evening. You were in the middle of eating your dinner very sulkily when you hear the front door unlock. After a moment you can watch Jungkook drudge into the living room and plop down on the couch beside you. 
"And?" 
"No", he says, shaking his head. He sighs loudly and covers his eyes with his arm. 
You have to fight the urge to smile. 
"Damn that sucks. I'm sorry”, you say.
"Yeah, it’s okay I guess", he murmurs and sighs again, "I think I’m gonna stop looking." 
You feel happy for a second. 
"Oh no. Why? It’s been going so well”, you fake your surprise.
"It's not been going well. I-I think that they are pretty, meet up but when they show the first indicator of wanting to fuck I lose all attraction to them and pull away." 
Now that is news to you.
"Hold up. You always told me that they just weren’t interested in sex." 
He pulls his arm away, sending you one of his caught-in-a-lie-looks. 
"Yeah uhm...those were lies. Sorry", he confesses with a blush. 
"Dude" you gasp, "I was literally rooting for you and all this time you were the one pulling away?" 
"I know", he whines, sitting up, "but it just felt so wrong to do when I was in the situations. I realised that I basically know nothing of them and that I haven’t even developed any real emotional connections and I just…" he sags his shoulders, "...I stopped being attracted and just wanted out." 
"So you left because you guys didn’t have enough time to form a bond?" 
He nods his head. 
"It feels so wrong...to me", he confesses, "I don’t know how you do it, but I just…" he touches his chest, "...I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I just can’t do it." 
You study him. You might have a gist and it suits him. It really does. 
"Not to assume your sexuality but it kinda sounds to me like you could be demi." 
"Demi? What’s that?" 
"It's when you can only feel sexually attracted to someone once you developed some sort of deep emotional bond with them." 
"Oh, I never heard of that. Is it wrong?" 
"No, of course not. It’s just as right and correct as any sexuality. Look it up if you want, I think you could find some answers in it." 
"Hm, yeah I will.." Jungkook murmurs and zones out. 
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Jungkook comes to your room that night, knocking once before sticking his head inside. 
"Hey ___? Are you awake?"
You turn your bedside lamp on and sit up.
"Yeah, what’s up?" 
"Can we talk?" 
"Sure." 
Jungkook closes the door behind him and waddles to your bed. He crawls on top of it, pulling your spare blanket over his body. 
"Can you turn the lights off?" 
That means whatever Jungkook wants to talk about is really difficult for him and also embarrasses him. He only really has serious conversations with the lights off or with his eyes closed eighty percent of the conversation. 
"Sure", you say and turn off the lights. 
Your curtains are see through enough to let in some light. You can still see his features even if they are slightly distorted in darkness. He seems troubled.
"What's up Kook?" 
"___ I think I’m demisexual", he whispers. 
"Yeah? Did you do research?" 
"I did and I see so much of myself in it."
"That's great, I’m happy for you." 
"I don't feel happy about it." 
"What? Why?" 
"Because I feel like I’m broken. Like something is wrong with me." 
"There is nothing wrong with you." 
"Yeah it is. How should I ever have sex when I need feelings for it? How should I ever have one night stands? Or hook-ups? Or kiss someone?" 
"Kook", you reach out to hold his hand, "you don’t have to have one night stands or hook-ups or make out with strangers. There is literally no rule for that." 
"But I don’t - I can’t - I", he exhales shakily, "what about the body count? A-and me being man enough to have many fucks?" 
"That's society being a bitch to you guys and giving you really toxic expectations. Being a man isn’t about how many chicks you slept with but about you being a respectful and sweet person", you squeeze his hand, "and last time I checked you were hell of man enough." 
"You think so?" he asks quietly. 
"Yes Jungkook. I really do. You are sweet, helpful, respectful, kind and such an amazing person. And that's all that matters." 
"Really?" 
"Yes." 
He is silent for a while as he thinks your words over. You caress his knuckles in the meantime, thinking to yourself that holding his hand tonight felt different than on other nights. It felt safe and made your heart flutter and you somehow didn’t want it to end. 
"So you don’t think something is wrong with me?" he asks quietly.
"No, nothing is wrong with you. On the contrary, I think it's really cool of you that you found something you feel comfortable with." 
"Thank you", he whispers, squeezing your hand. 
"Don't thank me, it’s alright." 
There is silence again. A silence you watch Jungkook use to gaze at your face until you realise that you also used it to gaze at his face. You felt nervous then. 
"___ I don’t know what to do now. I don’t think dating apps are for me, but I don’t know how else to meet people." 
"I could take you with me to the club. I'll hook you up with someone." 
"No, I don’t like clubs. They’re loud and have too many people." 
You chuckle. That's so typical him. 
"Fine, then let's go somewhere you like going. That will maximise your chance to meet someone with the same mindset." 
"But...I don’t go anywhere." 
"Yeah true, I forgot you’re basically a cave animal." 
"Hey." 
You chuckle, "no judgment here." 
He pouts. 
"Don't worry Kook. You'll find the perfect one. Trust me", you assure him, shaking him by his shoulder gently. 
"I don't know about it anymore", he murmurs, letting out a loud sigh. 
“Hey champ, don’t give up now. It’s only been a month and we haven’t even explored all the options.” 
“I guess”, he whispers before pulling your hand closer to rest his cheek on it. His eyes are softer now that he looks at you, his cheek feels so warm against your knuckles. He gives you a sweet smile and then closes his eyes.
Your heart feels so weirdly warm again. So fluttery and light.
“Are you going to sleep here?” you ask him quietly, feeling short of breath by now. Jungkook has never been that cuddly before. 
He nods his head.
“Oh, okay. That’s aight”, you murmur. 
You spend the silence thinking to yourself what is going on between you and him lately whilst staring at Jungkook until he has fallen asleep and even then you stare until tiredness practically forces your eyes closed. 
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It was slightly chilly today. You spend your day in thick wool socks and your coziest sweater. You are painting again. Now working on another art piece. Evanescence had been finished last week and got you a B because according to the teacher the paint application could have been smoother. 
Now you are working on a self portrait, slowly but surely losing your mind over it. 
"Urgh I hate it", you groan, dropping the pencil. 
"What's wrong?" Jungkook asks. 
"I can't get it right. My eyes look weird no matter what I do", you whine. 
Jungkook gets up from his chair and hurries over to you. He places himself behind you and inspects the painting. It was currently only done with pencil, a rough sketch of your features. The canvas where your eyes are supposed to be is already smeared with half erased pencil splotches. 
"Can I?" he asks. 
"Sure, whatever", you murmur, slightly pissy. You hand him the pencil, gasping inaudibly when a second later he leans down and cages you between his body and the canvas. You can even smell his cologne that way. 
"Look, you are drawing your eyelids like this while they look more like this", he explains, sketching your left eye perfectly. 
You feel so...giddy. He is behind you, chest resting against your back, face inches away from touching yours and arms caging you in as he reaches forward. This is something you and him have never done before and somehow it feels so exciting that you could burst.
“There we go, that looks good”, he murmurs and begins sketching out your right eye.
You feel even giddier. This is a perfect replica of your left eye. Like you are looking into a mirror. How is he that good at sketching your eyes? Why does he know the shapes and differences and the way your lashes look? 
You look at his face. He seems so concentrated. His lower lip is between his teeth, there is a crease between his brows and his eyes are just squinted slightly. You can’t…stop…staring at him.
"And look, your right eye is just a little different at the corner. Look, you have to go like this", he whispers, replicating it perfectly. 
It is identical to your actual eye. It is like he has sketched them a million times before. 
You look at his face again, eyes lingering on his lips. His tongue darts out, pink and wet, to lick over his lips. 
“Okay and then you have to go like this to make the lid like this”, he explains before parting his lips in concentration. 
Has his nose always been that pretty? Has it always curved that perfectly? Did the tip of it always look so kissable? 
"What do you think?" he looks at you, noticing your staring, "i-is it good?" he stutters, blushing.
You startle, feeling your heartbeat skip a beat in panic. He caught you staring oh god. 
"It's uhm…it’s literally perfect", you whisper, "how the hell did you do that?" 
"I don't know uhm", Jungkook takes a step back, "practice I guess." 
He waddles back to his desk, beginning to draw with his cheeks burning up. You let your eyes linger on him for one more second before looking back at the perfectly drawn eyes. 
You touch your chest. 
What is happening to you? 
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Your self portrait gains you an A+ with the reasoning that you truly captured the essence of your eyes. You felt slightly guilty because it wasn’t you who drew your eyes, but Jungkook. 
The latter is already back from the gym when you come home. He is cooking, dainty waist accentuated by an apron which he had tied together at his back with a perfect ribbon.
"That smells delicious", you announce yourself. 
Jungkook turns and gives you a quick grin. 
"Hey ___ how was class?" 
"Alright. I got my self portrait back. I got an A+."
"Really?" Jungkook gasps and smiles, "that’s great, I’m happy for you." 
You claim the space next to him, snatching a piece of carrot to snack on it. 
"Don't eat too many, I need them for the soup." 
"Alright", you say, watching him stirr the clear broth, "I got an A because my eyes were perfect." 
Jungkook sneaks a glance your way. 
"Yeah? Nice, you worked really hard on them." 
"Hell I did. You did", you nudge his arm, "it's your fault I got an A. Seriously, how are you that good at drawing my eyes?" 
He blushes and shrugs his shoulders. 
"Luck? I don’t know, I've been drawing for so long it feels easy to draw eyes." 
"You didn’t even look at them before you started. You just drew. That's literally so impressive." 
"Ah, no. It was nothing. Maybe I just spend too much time with you." 
You and him make eye contact. Your heart skips a beat in your chest, your fingers feel clammy. 
"Hah", you let out and laugh nervously, "maybe. Uhm yeah...can I help you with something?" 
Jungkook, who feels the sudden awkwardness too, looks away with a racing heart.
"Sure, uh. Could you maybe set the table?" 
"On it!"
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The food in the cafeteria was surprisingly yummy today. Seokjin and Namjoon are with you and Jungkook and just this moment you can watch Hoseok and Yoongi walk up to your table with trays in their hands. 
“Hey guys”, they greet you and sit down. 
“Yo bro. What’s up?” you greet them. 
“Nothing much, the usual”, Yoongi says and shrugs his shoulders, “I heard that you’re looking into dating Jungkook.”
“Who told you that?” Jungkook gasps. 
“Namjoon.”
“Hyung”, Jungkook whines, “I told you that in private.” 
“I’m sorry, it was an accident. It just spilled out of me.”
“You literally suck so much”, Jungkook whines and pouts. 
“Hey guys”, Jimin says.
He had just joined your table with Taehyung by his side. 
“Hey”, you all greet them. 
They sit down and while Jimin begins eating, Taehyung turns his attention to Jungkook. 
“Namjoon told me that you wanna date?” 
“Namjoon!” Jungkook whines, slapping the older guy on his arm. 
"I'm sorry bro, I’m sorry for my fault", Namjoon says, looking clearly embarrassed.
“What’s going on?” Taehyung asks confused. 
“It was supposed to be a secret”, you explain. 
“Ah I see”, he says and hums, “either way, it’s a good thing I know. I have a date for you Kook.”
Jungkook looks at Taehyung. You feel your stomach tighten uncomfortably. 
“You do?” 
“Yep. One of my classmates in photography is looking for a date so I told her about you and she said that you sound very interesting and cute. She wants to meet up tomorrow.”
“Wow, this is so spontaneous”, Jungkook says and laughs in disbelief. 
“I know and that’s her”, Taehyung says, showing a picture of her on his phone, “she likes photography, has an interest in drawing and goes to the gym twice a week. She is also a big romance movie nerd and likes those weird cookies you like.” 
You clench your hands to fists, trying your hardest not to show just how much your heart stings right now. She sounds like Jungkook’s dream girl and she is so pretty too. 
“She is so pretty”, Jungkook says and blushes, “yeah okay, tell her I’m in.”
Fuck. It feels like someone just punched you into the chest and twisted your heart. 
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“How do I look?” Jungkook asks you, striking a pose in front of you. 
Like you are out to break my heart. 
“You look cute, those jeans look good on you”, you say. 
“Thanks”, he says and giggles, “I’m kinda excited, I feel like she’s going to be really nice.” 
“Mhm, yeah.”
Jungkook has been nervous the entire day. He is going on a date. He told you that he is so happy about it because Taehyung has always had good taste in girls and if she is Taehyung approved then she must be awesome. You just agreed with a nod before hiding in the bathroom so he couldn’t see the way your eyes filled with tears. 
You were so confused by your reactions. You wanted Jungkook to help find love, you really did and yet somehow each time he made an attempt at finding it you wished for the date to turn out a complete fail. It confused you so much.
“Oh crap, it’s already so late. I promised to pick her up. I gotta go”, he says. 
“Yeah, have fun”, you call after him, burying yourself in the heap of pillows on the sofa and hoping that they would make you disappear. 
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You were in the bathroom when Jungkook came back from the date. You leave the bathroom in nothing but your towel, startling when you meet him in the living room. 
“Jesus christ Kook!” you exclaim.
“Oh god I’m so sorry”, he gasps, covering his eyes quickly. 
You and him have a rule to not look at the other when they are fresh out of the bathroom. You just felt more comfortable doing so because you were so close to being naked in those moments and you didn’t want to invade the other’s privacy. 
“Why are you back already?” you ask him, covering your chest despite it being safely wrapped in a towel. 
“Do we have to have this conversation like this?” he asks. 
“Yeah no, give me a minute.” 
You return once you are in your pjs, sitting down next to him. 
“So what’s up? Why are you back already?” 
“I don’t know”, he gives you a pout, “I got cold feet again.”
You are literally so happy inside. 
“Oh no that sucks”, you say, giving him sorry eyes. 
“Yeah”, he says and scoffs, “fuck, it’s literally driving me nuts. She is so sweet and funny and pretty and I really liked spending time with her, but when she began to give me hints of wanting to have sex I just thought to myself that she became so unattractive all of a sudden and I didn’t want to be with her anymore.” 
“Mhm, I hear you.” 
“So I told her that this isn’t going to work and left. I feel so bad because she looked so devastated and confused. W-we even held hands and cuddled and then I pull away again. I don’t get it.”
“Don’t beat yourself up about it. I guess, it just wasn’t meant to be.”
“But she was so perfect”, Jungkook says, “she has everything I want in my dream girl and even that wasn’t enough to make me sexually attracted to her.”
“Well maybe you just need to stop forcing it. You can still enjoy someone’s time without needing to bone.”
“So you think that I should call her and tell her sorry? And to ask her for another date?”
That was not what you wanted for him to get out of this. 
“I mean no, but-”
“Maybe I just need to hang out with her more to form a bond!” he says with his eyes lighting up. 
“Kook I wasn’t-”
“Thank you so much ___, I’m gonna call her right away”, he says and jumps off the couch to disappear into his room. 
“This was literally not what I wanted you to take out of this…” you murmur, feeling beyond defeated. 
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You were in the cafeteria again, eating your lunch with your friends. Jungkook was happy. You just kind of withered away beside him. 
Like always Taehyung and Jimin join you the latest, sitting next to each other. 
“So I heard you and Jieun are going well?” Taehyung says and grins. 
“Yeah, we’re doing great. She’s really nice”, Jungkook says and unbeknownst to him he is twisting a glowing blade in your chest with his words. 
“So have you kissed already?” Jimin teases. 
Jungkook blushes before shaking his head, “not yet.”
“Dude come on, you’ve been going on how many dates now? Five? Kiss her already.” 
Jungkook lowers his eyes shyly, “maybe tonight. She invited me to her place for dinner.”
“Ooooh Kook”, the guys say, nodding their heads in contentment. 
“That's basically third base. You’ll so get laid tonight”, Seokjin says, patting Jungkook’s back brotherly. 
“Yeah you can shower her in gold”, Yoongi jokes teasingly to which the others cackle in mischief. Jungkook just blushes. You let out a loud laugh. So loud in fact that they all look at you as if you were crazy. 
“You’re so fucking funny Yoongi”, you spit and laugh again, “shower her in gold. hahaha, so funny”, you growl. 
“Uhhh what is going on?” Hoseok asks, eyeing you with suspicion. 
“She is acting so weird”, Namjoon murmurs. 
You stand up, still laughing. 
You grab your tray of half-finished food, still laughing. 
“So funny, so fucking funny”, you laugh and turn to walk away, leaving your friends behind in their confusion. 
This is the first day you cry on the toilet because by now you realised that those weird feelings in your chest were you being head over heels in love with Jungkook and now you have to watch as he is falling for someone else. 
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You lock your phone and sigh loudly. 
Seokjin sent you the third text asking you if you were alright. 
You were not alright. You were miserable. You just realised that you are in love with your best friend and that you are losing him to someone else. And you hate yourself for it because you were the one who brought him onto this whole dating shit in the first place. If you hadn’t encouraged him all those months ago then maybe you wouldn’t be in so much pain right now. Maybe then Jungkook would be with you right now, doodling in his little sketchbook while humming to himself. Maybe then Jungkook wouldn’t be in some other girl’s apartment, probably getting the best fuck ever. 
“I’m such an idiot”, you groan, burying your face in your own hands, “why did I have to fall for him?”
You feel like such a hypocrite too. In the time you and Jungkook lived together you went on many dates with many different guys. At one point you were also in a eight months long relationship with a guy. Not once you thought of Jungkook during those moments. And now that he is doing the same thing you were doing, you want to be protective over him and develop feelings for him. You feel like such a hypocrite.
Click. 
You turn your head and watch how the lights outside turn on. 
“What?” you murmur. 
Silence for a little then Jungkook appears in the doorway.
“Jungkook?” 
“Hey”, he says and gives you a tired smile. 
“Uh hey”, you hide the used tissues quickly and sit up on the couch, “why are you here? I thought you wanted to stay over at Jieun’s place.”
He shrugs his shoulders, closing the distance between him and the couch in big steps. He sits down with a sigh, stretching out his legs before resting them on your lap. You feel how every fiber in your body begins tingling at it. 
“Kook, what happened?” 
“Nothing”, he says and looks at your face, “what happened to you? You were acting really worrisome in the cafeteria.” 
“Oh that”, you look away, “I was just…running late to a lecture.” 
“You don’t have lectures at that time.” 
“Yeah well, uhm…it was a spontaneous decision.” 
“___ you are just as shitty of a liar as I am. Seriously, what’s up?” 
“Nothing is up”, you insist, “I don’t wanna talk about it.”
“Okay, I get it”, he nudges your stomach with his foot, “if you feel ready, I’m always here to listen.”
“Thank you Kook”, you say, feeling so close to tearing up because you realised that you will never ever have such a tight bond with anyone. He knows you so well. He knows your prettiest days and your ugliest days. He knows your favourite foods and your most hated and he knows how you like your coffee in the morning. He knows when to leave you alone and when to make jokes with you. He knows that you have his back and in return offers you his back as well. 
And knowing that you will never ever feel more comfortable than you do with him is literally ripping you apart. Perhaps the worst knowledge of all however, was the fact that the people on your paintings all began to somehow resemble Jungkook. Some carried his smile, some carried his eyes, some shared the same clothes with him and some just shared that pretty hair colour of his’. And now he is sitting here after coming home from a date with another girl while you can’t even tell him what was bothering you because it would ruin your friendship. 
Jungkook relaxes back on the couch and inhales deeply. 
“I ended it with Jieun.” 
“What?” you squeak out, “what the hell? Why?” 
“It’s not gonna work out between us”, he says and somehow he seems content. 
“I don’t get it. Weren’t you guys doing so great?” 
“Well, not anymore. She told me to throw my sketchbook away, so I ended it with her.” 
“What the fuck? Why would she tell you that?” 
He shrugs his shoulders, “I guess she didn’t like what I draw, but I’m not gonna give it up for someone I’ve only known for a month.”
“Damn, I’m sorry Kook. That sucks”, you say and you mean it honestly. 
“Don’t be. I’m not sad”, he says and smiles, “I’m relieved actually.”
“Really?” 
He nods his head and closes his eyes. 
“I wasn’t attracted to her, despite all the things we had in common. I tried not to force it, but I was still stressed about it. But now I don’t have to be anymore.”
“Well uhm, I guess I’m happy for you then?” 
Jungkook looks at you and smiles. 
“Thanks”, he sits up, pulling his legs away, “now if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna take a bath because I am still very shaken up. Nobody told me just how much it sucks to break up with someone”, he says and gets up, “did you eat already?” he asks over his shoulder. 
“I didn’t, no.”
“Nice. Wanna order pizza tonight?” 
“Sure. I’ll order it. The usual?” 
He nods his head and then disappears for his bath. 
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You spend your waiting time pondering on the sofa what the hell Jungkook could have drawn that made Jieun react so rudely. You know that looking into his sketchbook would invade his privacy, but it is tempting you so much. So much in fact that you jump off the couch to sneak to his backbag and get said sketchbook. 
Now are sitting on the couch again, staring at the closed book with shaking hands. 
You have never invaded his privacy like that. You guys don’t do that. You ask before sneaking a glance at the other’s art. That is what you always did. But you are just so curious. 
You open the book on the third page. 
A sketch of a flower looks back at you. This must be one of the works he did in summer. It was drawn in blue ink and Jungkook had a blue ballpoint pen phase in summer. It looks really pretty. You flip the page. More sketches of nature. Flowers, a tree, three birds. Each as pretty as the other. You flip the page again. Sketches of the city. Doors, windows, buildings, skyscrapers. One drawing of a crosswalk with people scurrying around. All done in blue ink. 
You flip yet another page. The ink changes to pencil again. A drawing of a cloud with the moon behind it. It is one of his practice doodles. You have seen him do it a million times before and on every surface possible.
You flip the page again. 
Eyes, lips, noses. Dozens and dozens of doodles cover the pages, becoming gradually better and more detailed. They cover the next ten pages as well. They cover the eleventh page as well and that is when realisation dawns on you. Those were your features. 
With shaking fingers you flip the page. 
“Woah”, you gasp. 
Doodles of you. Your side profile, you laughing, you furrowing your brows in concentration, you looking completely relaxed. 
You flip the page. 
More doodles. You with your hair messy, you with your hair done, you in shabby shirts and pretty dresses. 
You flip the page, feeling so breathless by now. 
Your eyes again, your lips right next to them. Your hands join his practice routine. You holding brushes, you resting them in different positions, you keeping them relaxed. 
You blink the burning in your eyes away and flip the page. 
Just one drawing, it spreads over the entire page. 
You sitting on your stool in front of your canvas, painting Evanescence. The atelier is behind you in great detail, the curtains seem to dance in the breeze and even the sunlight looks as if it was real. 
You flip the page again. 
A portrait of you, perfectly replicated and oh so pretty. Jungkook hasn’t finished the shading on your right side yet. 
You lift your gaze from the book. 
“Holy shit”, you press out. 
Jungkook is drawing you. That would explain why he replicated your eyes so perfectly. Because he had drawn them a hundred times before. 
You press the book to your chest and let out a shaky laugh. 
This is a book filled with your face. Jungkook filled his space most private with doodles of you. You understand now why Jieun wanted him to throw it away. But Jungkook didn’t. Jungkook broke up with her because he wanted to keep it. He wanted to keep those drawings. He chose drawing you secretly over dating Jieun openly. 
“Holy fuck”, you murmur, feeling yourself tear up. 
That is when the doorbell rings and you are reminded that you weren’t alone.
“Can you get it? I’m still naked!” Jungkook calls out from the bathroom.
“Uh, yeah. Sure I’ll get it!” you tell him, feeling beyond embarrassed.
You just invaded his privacy. Quick! You need to hide the book again!
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The apartment already smells like pizza when Jungkook comes outside, dressed in his bathrobe and with his hair wet.
“I’m so hungry already”, he says, strutting past you, “give me a minute and I’ll be back.”
You look at him as he walks past you, feeling so freaking giddy in your chest that it becomes hard to breathe.
Jungkook returns in his pjs and his wet hair combed out of his face for practicality. You however feel close to swooning because he is so attractive to you all of a sudden. He is here. With his face all bare and his hair all wet and his body in comfy pjs while a sketchbook full of you fills his backbag.
He sits next to you and opens his pizza carton.
“Mhhhm that looks so yummy. I’ll enjoy it well”, he says and then goes complete apeshit on the poor pizza. On normal days you can’t watch him eat pizza. It not only disgusts you but also angers you because Jungkook does not enjoy the experience he just shoves piece after piece into his mouth and chews aggressively. But tonight you can’t stop staring. You can’t stop staring at the way his fingers hold the slice, the way he bites off a piece, how his lips are covered in the reddish grease and look so much pinker, how he swallows and then goes for another bite.
“Mhm seriously, tonight’s a good night”, he sighs, leaning back and chewing the pizza with closed eyes, “I took a bath, have pizza and can spend time with you.”
You look away, hiding your burning cheeks behind your hands and hoping that Jungkook doesn’t notice just how giddy you suddenly are.
“Yeah, tonight’s good”, you say to which Jungkook hums in agreement and then snatches a new slice of pizza.
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“Jungkook”, Taehyung says, sitting down aggressively, “what the hell?”
The conversations you and the others had stop, eyes flitting to Taehyung. He was angry.
“You broke up with Jieun?”
“Dude what?” Namjoon gasps.
“I did”, Jungkook says and nods his head.
“Why?” Taehyung laughs in disbelief, “you guys were perfect for each other.”
Jungkook shrugs his shoulders, “we turned out that we weren’t”, he says nonchalantly.
“I don’t get it. She was totally your type and shared the same hobbies as you. What could not be perfect about her?"
“She just wasn’t”, Jungkook grumbles, crossing his arms in front of his chest, “I’m not gonna waste my time with someone I don’t even like.”
“Damn”, Hoseok says.
“Well someone ain’t sugarcoating shit”, Yoongi says.
“Hah”, Taehyung scoffs, “that’s like mind boggling. Goddamn I was so sure that she was right for you.”
“Sorry hyung, but I’m better off single.”
“Mhm”, Taehyung studies Jungkook’s features, “doesn’t matter. I have someone else for you. Her name’s Sally, very sweet girl and also totally your type.”
Your stomach twists in jealousy.
“Here, that’s her.”
Goddamn she is pretty and totally Jungkook’s type. You are feeling anxious again.
Jungkook looks at her and shakes his head.
“No thank you. I think I’m gonna give up on dating again.”
A million pounds lift from your heart.
“Are you serious?” Seokjin gasps.
Jungkook nods his head.
“Well, did you at least kiss Jieun before breaking up?” Jimin asks.
“No?” Jungkook scoffs, “how weird would that have been?”
You didn’t want to ask Jungkook if he had kissed Jieun or not, so hearing him deny it makes you feel so fluttery in your chest.
Jimin studies his friend’s face.
“Damn, I couldn’t live like you. I think my balls would literally explode.”
“Yeah well”, Jungkook just shrugs his shoulders.
“Don’t you wanna know how it feels? Kissing? That shit feels so nice and you don’t want to feel that?”
“Of course I do.”
“So why are you not taking Tae’s offer? She is a pretty girl.”
“Because I don’t work like that”, Jungkook grumbles, growing angry, “now can you stop obsessing over the fact that I’m a virgin.”
“You’re a virgin?” Yoongi gasps.
Jungkook is as silent as a graveyard, face beet red and eyes widened.
“No way, you’re a virgin”, Jimin gasps, throwing his hand over his mouth, “that explains so much.”
“So you never had sex or kissed someone? So you lied in Never Have I Ever, the sacred game? Oh my god JK!” Seokjin gasps.
“Damn Jungkook, I’m so sorry for you”, Hoseok says, patting Jungkook’s back brotherly.
Jungkook stands up and runs with his head hanging low.
“Hey Kook! Don’t run away!” Namjoon calls after him.
You stand up as well, sending them all icy glares.
“You guys are being real dicks about it”, you hiss
“What did we do?” Taehyung asks with genuine confusion in his voice.
“You know what you did”, you spit and turn to leave.
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Jungkook is in the campus park just outside the cafeteria, sitting on a bench. He doesn’t hear you come over, flinching when you place your hand on his upper back. He lifts his head, giving view to his teary eyes.
“Hey”, you say, watching the tears roll down his red cheeks.
“Don’t l-look a-at m-me”, he stutters, hiding his face behind his hands.
You know that he is crying because he is embarrassed. Poor boy. You pull him into your side, rubbing his arm soothingly.
“They didn’t mean any harm in it.”
“I-it’s still so m-mean.”
“I know”, begin playing with his hair to soothe him, “for what’s it worth I think you were really cool standing up for yourself like that.”
Jungkook sniffles, looking up at you.
“I made a total fool of myself.”
“Nah you didn’t. They were really weird about it.”
Jungkook isn’t crying anymore. He is just pouting with his big eyes all glassy. You reach out and brush his tears away. It makes him close his eyes and his lips part. He is so pretty. With his delicate features and his fluffy hair and his red cheeks. He is seriously so pretty.
Jungkook opens his eyes.
“Do you think I should have just gone through with it?” he asks, “maybe I have to force myself to my luck and just fuck someone.”
“No, nope. Bad idea. Don’t do that. This will only end in regret and you thinking of sex in a bad light. Don’t do it Kook.”
“But what if I’ll never find someone?”
You take a deep breath, dancing your thumb over his cheekbone and wishing it was his upper lip instead.
“You’ll find someone, I promise you”, you tell him, pulling your hand away before you actually touch his lips.
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“___?”
“Yeah?” you mumble, half-asleep.
“Can I come in?”
“Mh-hm.”
The door closes and with it the room becomes dark again. You hear the padding of his naked feet then the soft ruffling of him climbing on the bed and pulling the blanket over his body. You don’t open your eyes, not because you don’t want to, but because you’re so tired that it’s impossible.
“I have something to tell you”, he says.
“Okay, go ahead. I’m listening.”
“Okay, uhm.”
Jungkook takes a deep breath. And we are talking deep. That man wants his lungs to inflate like a balloon with the amount of air he is inhaling. He exhales through his mouth before taking another breath.
“Can you take my virginity?”
“Mhm sure”, you murmur, drifting off to sleep.
Sudden realisation.
“What?” you yelled the word, wide awake instantly, “excuse the motherfucking me. What did you just ask me?”
“I’m just so fed up with it. I don’t want the guys to be all weird about it anymore and I wanna be able to drink when someone says never have I had sex and I just wanna not be a virgin anymore And I, I did some thinking a-and it would make sense.”
“Nah, no”, you sit up, “it doesn’t make sense that you think that it makes sense.”
“What?” Jungkook asks, blinking in confusion.
“I get that you are fed up with it. But why on earth do you think that me taking your virginity makes sense?”
“Because I know you”, Jungkook sits up, “I feel like I’ve developed a deep enough bond with you that it wouldn’t be awkward. A-and you are experienced so you, you could show me what to do.”
“Dude”, you touch your forehead to rub it vigorously, “you just verbally punched me in the stomach.”
“I’m sorry”, Jungkook grows smaller, “I just thought that maybe this could be the solution to everything. I can say that I had sex before a-and I know you so I’d feel comfortable too and you could give me tips f-for the future. So I can be all experienced with girls.”
“I can give you tips without fucking you Kook.”
“But then…” he lowers his gaze, “…I’d still be a virgin”, he whispers.
“Jesus christ, you’re doing things to me”, you murmur, feeling dizzy.
“It was just an idea, just forget it”, he says panicky, “I just thought that maybe you could do me the favour and help me be less of a loser.”
“You’re not a loser Kook just cause you’re a virgin so get that shit outta your head real fast.”
Jungkook lowers his head, touching his ears.
“I’m sorry. This was such a bad idea. Can we please act like I never said anything?”
“I guess. I don’t know.”
“I’m gonna leave now”, he says and rolls out of bed, “sleep tight.”
“You too?”
The door closes and you are left in your shock. You will toss and turn for the next three hours before exhaustion literally forces you to fall asleep.
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Jungkook is sitting in the kitchen the next morning, visibly tensing up when you come inside.
“Morning”, you murmur, feeling awkward.
“Morning”, he answers you, feeling the same.
You shimmy from one foot to the other.
“I made you coffee”, Jungkook says, pushing a cup of coffee over the table.
“Thanks”, you accept it and take a sip. It tastes delicious, just the way you like it.
“Did you sleep well?”
“I did, but if you wanna know the truth I didn’t”, you say, eyes lingering on his lips, “I couldn’t fall asleep.”
“Yeah, uh. Neither could I.”
You and him look away, sipping on your coffees nervously.
“What do you have planned today?” he asks.
“Nothing much, I’m just gonna paint.”
“Okay, I’ll go to the gym later.”
“Okay, do that.”
You exchange an awkward gaze. Jungkook touches his ears. You clear your throat loudly.
“Anyways, I think I’m gonna start with the painting now. The light’s good right now.”
“Yeah sure do that.”
You leave the kitchen, feeling so confused and nervous and awkward that you wanted to explode. And not in a sexy kind of way but a bomb and destruction kind of way.
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You are still painting when Jungkook comes home from the gym. He doesn’t go to you to say hello, but goes straight for the shower. He comes to the atelier once he is clean, wearing a black oversized tee and grey wide-legged pants. His hair is also still damp.
“I’m back”, he announces himself.
You sneak a glance at him, feeling nervous in an instant.
He can’t just come here looking like this after he asked you if you could take his virginity! It is like he wants to make your life a living hell.
“Hey”, you say, looking back at your painting.
Jungkook claims his spot and opens his sketchbook. The same exact sketchbook which is filled with drawings of you. You sneak a glance his way. He is concentrated on his drawing, not noticing your gaze. Is he currently working on the portrait again? Is he shading your cheekbone until it looks like yours?
You look back at your painting, gliding the brush over the canvas with trembling hands.
Jungkook told you that he only wants to have sex with someone he has an emotional connection with. Jungkook made many connections in the last few months and yet somehow he wants you to take his virginity. His sketchbook is filled with drawings of you, he broke up with Jieun so he could continue drawing you and he wants you to be his First. Could it be.
You look at him.
Does he like you too?
Jungkook lifts his head, locking eyes with you.
“What’s up?” he asks.
“I don’t know yet”, you murmur, turning your head back to the painting but keeping your eyes on Jungkook for as long as possible.
He is the one to break the eye contact first, looking into his sketchbook with pink cheeks. You mix yellow with green, adding some orange as well. You are looking for one very specific type of brown.
“What are you working on?” you ask him.
“Oh, just some doodles. Nothing important really.”
“Okay”, you say, adding a little bit more yellow, “what drawings did Jieun see, which made her want to throw your sketchbook away?”
You hear the sound of his pencil stopping.
“Just stuff.”
“Stuff”, you repeat, sneaking a glance at him, “what kinda stuff?”
Jungkook laughs nervously, touching his ears.
“It’s stupid, you don’t wanna know.”
“Mhm”, you let out, poking a brush into the paint before swirling it over the canvas.
Jungkook begins drawing again, sneaking glances your way every now and then.
“Is it creepy stuff?” you decide to play dumb.
“N-no it’s not.”
You turn your head to him.
“Sexual stuff?”
He shakes his head vigorously.
“Gore?”
“No, it’s just some weird stuff. It’s not even worth mentioning.”
“Can I see?”
Jungkook widens his eyes.
“Uuh s-sure?”
You get up in an instant, hurrying to his desk. Jungkook shows you the page with the nature stuff. He is so sneaky, good god.
“Look, it’s just weird doodles.”
“Huh. Does she have something against birds?”
“I guess?” he laughs nervously.
“Can I see more?”
“Uh, uhm. Yeah”, Jungkook flips the page and shows you the city doodles.
“Pretty, it’s so weird that she has something against those drawings.”
“Yeah totally. So weird.”
You look at his face.
“What were you working on right now?”
“Nothing?”
You snort, cocking up an eyebrow at him. Jungkook looks between your face and his sketchbook nervously, gnawing on his lower lip. When he realises that you would not stop looking at him he gives up with a loud sigh. 
He takes a deep breath and flips the pages until he lands on the portrait of you. Well you didn’t expect that. You would have expected him to find some sort of obvious lie as to why he can’t show it to you, but not for him to actually reveal his secret. Is this his subtle way of showing you his real feelings? 
You look at the drawing. The shading is almost done. Then you look at Jungkook. He has his head and eyes lowered, blushing vividly with his hands hidden between his legs.
“This is me.”
“Yeah, I know”, he whispers.
You reach out to flip the book to the drawing of the atelier.
“Fuck”, he says under his breath, burying his fingers in his hair before curling into a little ball, “I’m sorry ___.”
“For what?”
“I’m such a creep.”
“Are those the drawings Jieun saw?”
Jungkook nods his head.
“Well damn Kook, no wonder she was mad. I’d be upset too if the guy I fancied is filling his sketchbooks with drawings of his best friend.”
He groans, making himself even smaller.
“You know what? I wanna show you something.”
Jungkook watches as you get your drawing pad from your desk. You place it on top of his sketchbook.
“Open it.”
Jungkook opens it and starts flipping through it. It starts as paintings of landscapes and still lives. Until it slowly morphs into more and more person centric paintings. And slowly but surely the people in those paintings gain the features of Jungkook, his hair, his smile, his body. Jungkook lands on the last page, staring at the painting of him sitting by his desk.
Jungkook lifts his head, eyes glassy.
“What are those?” he presses out with his voice shaking.
“They were my greatest shame once, but these days I like to call them the visual representation of me falling for my best friend.”
“___”, he whispers, lower lip beginning to tremble.
“Don’t you cry on me now”, you say, nudging his arm, “I’ll cry too.”
Jungkook laughs but it sounds more like a sob than a laugh. You laugh too, feeling tears roll down your cheek. You nudge his arm again.
“You’re not the only one being creepy, Kook.”
He giggles, rubbing the sleeve of his shirt over his eyes. Then he looks up at you, giving you a blindingly bright smile. He stands up and closes his arms around you, burying his face in the crook of your neck.
“Oh Kook”, you whisper, hugging him back just as tightly.
He laughs and sobs, holding you in this one distinct way he always wanted to hold you. Tight, safe and with no distance between your bodies. This is the best day of his life.
You break away from him just enough that you and him could look at each other. You cup his cheeks, squishing them because all you wanted to do was squeeze his cute face.
Jungkook sniffles and laughs, giving you his prettiest smile. His eyes are sparkling so much, making you feel so beautiful.
You step closer, pulling him closer as well.
Jungkook stops laughing, eyes falling closed. His heart is racing so much.
This is his moment. You feel so nervous because you want to give him the best first kiss a human has ever experienced. He deserves it. For being the most amazing person in your life. 
You draw closer, rubbing the tip of your nose against his’. He sighs and twists the fabric of your shirt.
You pull back again, making his breath tremble and his eyelids flutter. One soft touch of your thumb dancing right over his upper lip. He parts them and furrows his brows.
“You’re so handsome Jungkook”, you whisper, drawing closer again to kiss his cheek.
“Oh”, Jungkook lets out softly, opening his eyes just enough to look at you.
“Can I kiss you?” you ask him.
He nods his head, closing his eyes again. He even holds his breath, sticking his lips out for the kiss. He is so cute, if you didn’t want to kiss him that badly you would have chuckled at his cute gestures. But you don’t. You don’t laugh, you kiss him.
You can hear how Jungkook takes a sharp inhale through his nose before he exhales shakily, tickling your cheek with it. He tries to kiss you back. His attempt is clumsy and ends with you having way too much of his spit on your lips.
You smile and pull him closer. You couldn’t wish for anything better.
Jungkook whimpers and licks over your lips before trying to bite them. You chuckle.
“Slow Kook, slow”, you whisper.
“It feels so good”, he answers you.
“I know, just let me…” you drift off, sucking on his lower lip gently before releasing it and kissing him slowly.
Jungkook sighs, calming down now that you control the tempo.
Gentle sucks, slow kisses, tender licks. You show him just how good kissing can feel all while getting lost in him at the same time. He tastes so good. Sweet like candy. He also has the softest lips you have ever felt. Like kissing heaven.
You break the kiss to give both of you a moment to breathe. You use the opportunity to look at his face. His cheeks are red, his eyes closed and his pink lips parted to catch his breath.
You claim them in a kiss again, eliciting the shiest of sounds from him. His fingers twitch on your upper back, trying to grasp more of you but failing. Your own fingers are running over his scalp, wanting to give him only the best sensations. His hair is so, so soft. You don’t ever want to stop touching it.
He gives you a shy lick, eliciting a soft moan from you. He is getting better at it already. Jungkook is a natural at many things and it seems that kissing is one of those things as well. He still uses way too much spit and every now and then his teeth clash with yours awkwardly, but his lips are slow and he makes sure to move them in sync with yours. He is also beginning to suck on your lower lip at the right moments and it is without teeth and excessive biting. Just soft sucks before he lets you guide the movements again. He is truly so good at it. 
You and him break the kiss at the same time, needing some time to catch your breath. This time around Jungkook opens his eyes as well, carrying the prettiest of galaxies in them. 
“How was that for a first kiss?” you whisper. 
“It’s the best feeling ever”, he breathes and places your hand over his heart, “my heart’s racing so much.”
You pull his hand over your heart, showing him that he wasn’t alone. 
“Mine too.”
He giggles, growing smaller in giddiness. 
“Do you really like me?” he asks. 
“Yes Kook, so much that it’s unhealthy.” 
“I like you too since I was twenty two.”
“Wow”, you gasp. 
Jungkook draws closer, “can we do it again?” he asks, closing his eyes in anticipation. 
You answer him by kissing him deeply. He has liked you since he was twenty two. Two years. He has liked you for two years now. This makes you want to never ever stop kissing him. 
You and him will kiss for a long time that day. You will kiss until your lips are tender and your fingers have memorised every inch of the other’s body. 
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Jungkook was in the bathroom for now. It was still the same day just a little later. You are in his room, preparing a hopefully nice surprise for him. It will be a complete shot in the dark and could end with him being overwhelmed, but you want to take that risk. You finish the last touches and hurry out of his room with giddiness in your chest. You close his door behind you and then sit down in the living room. Two minutes later Jungkook comes out of the bathroom, wearing his pjs. 
So now you are both freshly showered and in your pjs. The image is so familiar and yet tonight it feels so exciting to experience. 
“I’m back”, he announces, fumbling with his thumbs nervously, "and I brushed my teeth in case you wanted to make out more", he explains, waddling to the couch.
You don’t let him sit down, taking both his hands and tugging on them softly. 
“What are you doing?” he asks. 
“I have to show you something.” 
“Okay?” he lets you lead him to his room, “is it in my room?” 
“Mh-hm”, you nod your head and squeeze his hands, “close your eyes.” 
Jungkook obeys, even going as far as to cover them with his hands. He is seriously so endearing. 
You open the door first then place your hands on his arms to lead him into his room safely.
“Ready?” you ask him to which he nods his head, “okay, open your eyes.” 
Jungkook pulls his hands away and opens his eyes. He gasps, parting his lips. His lights are turned off, but his room wasn’t dark. Instead dozens and dozens of candles cover every surface of his furniture, painting everything in warm light. Your art music starts playing and Jungkook turns his head to see that you have pressed play on your phone. 
You lock eyes with him. 
“What is this?” he asks in a whisper. 
“It’s my answer.”
“Your answer?”
“If I can take your virginity.” 
“Oh”, he lets out and lets his eyes run over his room again. He touches his chest, cheeks heating up. 
“I thought I’d set up the surprise in your room so you’re in a familiar and safe environment”, you explain. 
Jungkook lets his eyes linger on his bed. 
“There’s of course no pressure here. We can do something else too. Cuddle or make out or play boardgames or something”, you say nervously, scratching the side of your neck.
Jungkook turns to you. 
“Sorry if I overwhelmed you”, you murmur, feeling your cheeks heat up. 
He shakes his head and steps closer to take you into a grateful hug. His cheek is resting on your shoulder and his arms are around your waist. It makes you feel as if you are floating. 
“Thank you so much”, he whispers. 
You smile, caressing his back. 
“So you like it?” 
He nods his head, making your smile grow. 
“I’m so happy you do. Oh Kook, I wanna make your first time so special.”
“It’s already special because it’s with you”, he whispers, making your heart flutter uncontrollably. 
He steps back, giving view to his pretty smile. He lets you cup his face in your hands, even going so far as to making himself smaller for you. You caress his cheekbones with your thumbs, mesmerised by every inch of him.
“So do you wanna have it tonight?” 
“Yes, I do."
You and him exchange a smile. He lowers his eyes shyly. 
“You j-just have to tell me what to do because I have no idea what’s good”, he murmurs. 
“That’s alright, tonight’s about you anyway. I’ll treat you so well.” 
“Wow hah”, he lets out a breathy laugh, shimmying from one foot to the other and tugging at the crotch of his shorts, “is it weird that this made me a little hard?” 
You chuckle, “no, it’s hot.” 
“Okay uhm…” he stops talking and leans in with his lips puckered and so ready to kiss you. This time around you can’t help but giggle, stopping him with a gentle squeeze. He peels his eyes open, keeping his lips pouted. 
“You’re so cute”, you chuckle, tracing his lips, “slow down sweets, we’ll take it step by step, alright?” 
He relaxes his lips and laughs nervously, “yeah okay, sorry I’m just so excited.”
“It’s alright. Come on, let’s sit down.”
You and him sit down on his bed, both of you cross-legged and facing the other. You are holding hands, caressing the other’s skin with your thumbs. 
You have honestly never felt more excited for sex than you do tonight. One night stands, quickies with strangers, casual relationships. Nothing – nothing – could have prepared you for the excitement you feel tonight. It makes your heart race and makes you feel short of breath. But it is not a bad feeling. It is amazing. Because for the first time in forever – maybe even for the actual first time – you are having sex with someone you have feelings for. And that feeling is epic.
“Do you have any wishes on how you want this to go?” you ask him. 
Jungkook lowers his head and giggles shyly. 
“N-no?” he stutters, obviously not wanting to tell.
“No? So no things you wanna try or fantasies?” 
He pulls his hands away, hiding his face behind them. He is even rocking himself back and forth. 
“It’s so embarrassing to tell”, he confesses. 
“It’s alright Kook, I won’t judge you.”
He shows you his face to say one single word before he hides it again. 
“Blowjobs.” 
“Ah I see. That sounds nice. I’ll make sure to include it.” 
At that he drops his hands, looking at you with sparkling eyes. It seems that he slowly but surely realises that there is seriously no shame or judgment here and that you are actually trying to make this as enjoyable for him as possible. 
“A-and neck kisses”, he stutters, touching his own neck. 
“Of course, those are mandatory.” 
He giggles, hiding his mouth behind his hand. 
“A-and I wanna see your boobies”, he whispers, “oh god sorry”, he gasps, closing his eyes. 
You chuckle, “a man of taste so I see. Okay, I’ll show you my boobs.” 
You reach out and hold his hands again, giving him a reassuring smile. 
“Anything else?” 
He shakes his head, gulping nervously. 
“Okay. Do you want to lie down for me?” 
Jungkook obeys, head sinking into the pillow and fingers fumbling with his shirt. You lie down on your stomach next to his body, resting your chest on his and playing with his hair. 
"Are you ready?" 
"Yes", he nods his head vigorously, "I'm so excited." 
"Me too Kook", you tell him and draws closer.
Jungkook inhales deeply and closes his eyes, sticking his lips out. 
You stumble into the kiss whilst smiling. He is seriously so adorable. Jungkook exhales shakily and touches your shoulders. His lips tremble as you kiss him, wanting to go fast again. But you don’t give him the chance, showing him the tempo with skilled moves and soft moans. 
Jungkook relaxes and sighs, he rests his hands on your chest. It makes you smile again because he gives your breasts a shy squeeze almost as if he wanted to test the waters. Also his gesture was so sweet. Him grabbing your tits just like that. Other guys would have gotten a slap on their faces for it, but with Jungkook it feels exciting.
“Do you like that?” you ask him. 
“Yeah, they’re so soft”, he says, squeezing them again. 
“You’re so cute Kook”, you whisper, kissing him again. Jungkook shivers and relaxes completely. His hands may squeeze and massage your breasts quite eagerly but his lips are slow and soon enough his tongue knows what to do as well. 
This turns you on so much. Everything about it. Jungkook. The kisses. The touches. Jungkook. 
"Kook", you break the kiss, "you turn me on so much." 
"Really?" 
"Yeah, so much", you breathe, kissing him again. 
Jungkook lets out a shy sound, abandoning your chest to touch your back instead. He lets his hands run up and down your spine continuously, giving you an involuntary squeeze each time you let your tongue trace his lips. He also makes a cute sound each time that happens. They are enough to make you rub your legs together. 
You kiss Jungkook for a long time that night. Slow kisses meant to guide and relax him. Deep kisses when he just tastes too good and you have to make sure to get all of him. Slow kisses again, barely there pecks and soft licks. Fast kisses when Jungkook is growing impatient again and you allow him a short moment to live out his desires. Short breaks for air used to litter his face with kisses. Long breaks for air used to gaze at the other. Slow kisses, deep and fast kisses, passionate kisses. 
You on top of him. Hands on your hips, fingers in his hair. Messy kisses, pants for air, even messier kisses. 
Your lips are swollen when you truly pull back again. Jungkook licks his tender lips, gazing up at you with half-lidded yet sparkly eyes. He giggles quietly, you retort it. 
"I know what you mean now", he says. 
"What do you mean?" 
"Kissing is amazing. E-especially when you can have sex afterwards." 
You smile, "right? It’s one of the best things you can do with someone." 
"Next to sex?" Jungkook asks, making you laugh. 
"Is this your not so subtle way of asking for the next step?" 
Jungkook blushes, "I don’t know. I'm nervous." 
"I get it, but don’t be. It’s just me and I'm here to make you feel good." 
"Mhm", he furrows his brows and squirms slightly, "w-whenever you say that I feel it in my penis."
"Your penis?" you can’t help but grin. 
Jungkook cringes, "was this weird to say?" 
"Nah, it’s just funny hearing the medical term for it." 
"Oh, okay", he blushes, "my d-dick?" 
"Oh Kook", you lean down and kiss his cheek, "that sounds sexier yeah." 
"Okay noted. So vagina is off the table too?" 
"Just call her pussy, it’s hotter." 
"Got it", he nods his head obediently. 
You study his face almost feeling like bursting. He is so sweet and loveable and he is the most handsome man ever and he is your best friend and now your lover too. This is the best day in your life.
"Should we take our shirts off?" you suggest.
"Uh, sure", he murmurs nervously.
"Let's take it slow, okay?" you calm him down by connecting your lips with his neck. 
His back arches off the mattress, he gasps for air loudly, his heart beats irregularly under your lips. Then he begins fidgeting with his legs, hips shimmying from side to side as well. So you lift your head to study his face. 
He seems like his entire world just changed. Lips forming the perfect O and eyes widened. 
"How's that?" you ask him. 
Jungkook touches the spot you kissed, blinking slowly. 
"That good?" 
He nods his head. 
"Good", you say, connecting your lips with the other side of his neck. 
He rolls his head to the side and whimpers quietly. His eyes are squeezed shut, his fingers twisting the sheets. You don’t know just how deeply affected he is right now. He will never ever be able to forget this feeling. It is burned into his brain and skin. 
You kiss his jawline next, feeling it move under your lips as he opens his mouth for air. For just a second and then you kiss the other side of his neck, caressing the one you previously kissed with your fingers. 
"This feels so good", he whispers, "ah.." 
You linger on his neck, letting your hand wander to different places. His shoulder, his chest, down his side and to his tummy. You change sides, eliciting another sigh from Jungkook. Then you begin touching up and down his stomach, making sure that you would tug up his shirt little by little. So little in fact that Jungkook doesn’t even notice at first, lost in your neck kisses, until the warmth of your fingertips lingers on his lower stomach. 
"Wait." 
You lift your head, retreating your hand. 
"Too fast?" 
"No, I’m just so weird about it. Sorry I panicked." 
"It's alright. Have you ever been naked in front of somebody?" 
"Yeah, in front of my mom when I was a boy." 
You look at him. 
"Oh god, that sounded so unsexy, I’m so sorry", he says and hides behind his hands. 
"It's alright", you assure him in a chuckle.
"I'm sorry, I’m literally such an unsexy mess. First I say penis and then I mention my mom." 
"Kook, you’re aight", you assure him and pull his hands away from his face, "why don’t I undress first?"
"Really?" 
You nod your head and sit back. Undressing in front of Jungkook is scary and weird and makes you feel so nervous. But you are willing to take those feelings when it means that he can have a comfortable experience. Besides, it is only really scary for the first few seconds and then Jungkook's flabbergasted yet completely starstruck expression makes you feel so incredibly sexy. 
"Holy shit you are so beautiful", he whispers. 
"Yeah? Do you like them?" 
He nods his head vigorously, "they are so perfect. So...so pretty a-and wow. ___ I don’t wanna look away." 
"Gosh, you’re gonna make me fluster", you confess.
"Can I maybe touch? Maybe? Please?" he asks shyly, "just for a second. Maybe?" 
"Of course you can touch them. Go ahead." 
"Thank you", he murmurs mindlessly, placing his hands on your tummy to guide them up your torso. His palms are soft and warm. His thumbs touch them first, running along the swell of them. 
"Wow", he whispers, placing the rest of his hands on them, "wow okay, wow." 
Wow indeed. In his completely mesmerised nature his touches are slow and placed with intent. He doesn’t even know just how good he makes you feel. Without even trying, Jungkook does exactly the things you like so much. Warm, soft palms rolling over your nipples, strong yet tender fingers massaging your flesh, fingernails tickling your skin every now and then. You are in heaven. 
"I can't stop touching them", Jungkook confesses, "___ they are so pretty and soft and warm and nice."
"Thank you", you say, voice slightly lowered in arousal. 
"Are you sensitive there? Do you feel what I'm doing?" 
"Yes Kook, I feel it and I'm in heaven."
"This is wow", he whispers, touching your nipples with his pointer fingers. They harden under his touch, making him widen his eyes in wonder. You moan softly, making his eyes flit to your face. Jungkook rolls his fingers over your nipples to test your reaction. 
"Yes", you sigh.
"Wow", he feels his heart begin to race in excitement, "does it really feel that good?" 
"Yes, so good", you tell him slightly breathless. 
Jungkook gulps and feels his dick twitch in his pyjama pants. 
"This makes me hard too." 
"Mhm", you hum, looking at his crotch and the very prominent dent behind his pants, "I can see. Do you want me to take care of it?" 
"Maybe? But c-can you do it slowly?" 
"Of course. I'll take off your shirt first and then massage you for a little. How does that sound?" 
"Kinda sexy", he says and giggles shyly. 
"I know, right?" you caress his tummy, "come now sweets work with me." 
The aspect of getting a massage mixed with the view of your boobs made Jungkook comfortable enough that taking off his shirt doesn’t feel scary anymore. He throws it on the floor and lies back down. He has your hands on his torso in an instant, feeling them run along his every inch. It feels so good that he has to close his eyes. 
"Jungkook seriously, I've never seen someone with a more perfect body than you. You’re making me want to paint you shirtless." 
"Oh god", he giggles shyly with his cock twitching in his pants. He feels so good inside and also out.
"Do you want to lay on your tummy now?" 
He follows, whining softly when this puts pressure on his cock. You help him get comfortable with your hands on his hips. Jungkook feels the touch so well that he has to bite down on the tip of his tongue in order not to moan. You are guiding his movements. Somehow this is so sexy to him. 
“There we go”, you say, running your palms all the way from his hips up to the beginning of his pits. You do that motion repeatedly, watching how this covers his skin in goosebumps and how he closes his eyes. 
You rest yourself on top of him, making sure your boobs are snug against his back and your lips ghost over the shell of his ear.
“Relax sweets, I’m gonna send you to heaven and back”, you whisper, making him squirm and blush furiously.
“Oh god w-why are you so good at sexy t-talk?” he stutters, having to giggle.
You grin, pecking his cheek, “practice. Now”, you sit back up, making yourself comfortable on the back of his legs, “let’s get started.”
You laid out a few things for tonight. Condoms, lube, oils and his favourite snacks and water for later. This is supposed to be his evening and you want to make sure that it is going to be perfect. You open the bottle of massage oil and let some trickle along his spine.
“Oh”, he lets out and giggles, moving his back from side to side, “what’s that?”
“Oil for the massage”, the bottle does a little click as you close it again then it does a thump as you place it back on his bedside table. You place your hands on his back and begin spreading the oil in big circular motions.
Jungkook tenses up before he relaxes in a shiver.
“Wow”, he just can’t stop saying that word. Everything just feels so good and amazing and wonderful that he can barely believe that it is actually happening to him.
You and him are silent for a while, floating on the sensations and letting the music do the rest. And while you touch his perfect back, you can’t stop letting your eyes run over every inch of it. You have never seen Jungkook shirtless before. This was your rule. You do not look at the other when they are fresh out of the shower or in only their underwear. Jungkook obeyed the rule and in return you obeyed it as well.
So seeing him shirtless with his strong muscles and those pretty dimples on his lower back leaves so many tingles in your stomach. He is so handsome. You stop on his lower back, tracing the slight indent where his spine is running up his back. So pretty. Jungkook is so mesmerising.
You abandon his lower back to travel along each side of his spine, rolling small circles on his skin. You reach his shoulder blades, outlining them with your thumbs all while massaging some of the tension out of them.
Jungkook makes a tiny sound.
“Too hard?” you ask him.
He shakes his head, “it feels so good”, he lulls, drooling on his pillow.
“I’m glad it does. You have such a sexy back”, you praise and opposite of what you are saying you run your hands along his relaxed arms.
Jungkook shifts and flutters his eyelids.
“And your arms are so nice too. I can see that you’re working out really hard.”
He giggles, hiding his eyes behind his hand. He is so giddy. You think his workouts pay off. This makes him feel so handsome and good.
You run your hands down his arms, reaching his back again. Down and down you go, shimmying down his legs until you rest between them. You place your hands on his thighs.
“Ah”, he lets out, parting his legs on instinct. He feels breathless. He didn’t think that it is possible for him to feel that turned on, but he does. He feels so restless and hot. You begin massaging him, touching the back of his thighs first before slowly but surely sneaking closer to the inside of them.
He sighs, lifting his hips from the mattress just to roll them down a second later.
“How’s that Kook?” you ask him, putting pressure into your touch and drawing circles.
“I-I-“, his voice cuts off as he lets out a shuddering breath instead. His hips lift and roll down again. You can watch how this makes his butt tense and relax.
You run your hands closer to his middle, making the tips of your fingers disappear under the wide legs of his pants. You are just inches away from the beginning of his buttocks, kneading his muscles in ways that go straight to his cock.
“Oh god”, he whispers, burying his face in the pillow to muffle the involuntary moan he lets out. You can watch how his back begins to heave up and down quickly and when you take a look down you can see that he began flexing and relaxing his toes repeatedly.
You grant him one gentle touch, running it along the swell of his butt and making sure that it would tickle his balls just slightly.
He flinches, scooting up a good two inches involuntarily. He laughs breathily, sneaking a shy glance down at you. His cheeks are so pink, his pretty eyes glassy.
“Do you want more sweets?” you ask him.
He hides his mouth behind his fist and nods his head shyly.
“Yeah?”
He puts more vigour into his nods, giving you big puppy eyes.
“So why don’t you roll over and I’ll suck your cock?”
Jungkook obeys with shaky knees, pressing his tiny fists into his chest as he looks up at you shyly. You claim his lips in a kiss before doing anything else, making sure that he can feel your boobs rub against his chest. It makes him open his fists and touch your back instead. Slow, deep kisses with tongue and encouraging moans on your side and Jungkook feels himself stumble further and further into this warm fuzzy space you created. And while you kiss him and silence all the worry in his mind, your left hand begins touching his torso. You play with his nipples for a while, realizing that this makes Jungkook kiss you back sloppily. You also realise that if you pinch them, he flinches and loses his rhythm for a good moment until you lead him back on the right path again.
Once his nipples are swollen and oh so sensitive, you move further down his torso, tracing his abs whilst whispering praises against his lips. Jungkook lets out a shy giggle each time you do, tasting even sweeter when you kiss him. 
But then you begin playing with the hem of his pants and Jungkook’s lips still.
“It’s alright sweets, it’ll feel good”, you encourage him in a whisper, nibbling on his lower lip gently.
“___”, he says, making his lip slip from your teeth.
“You’re doing so well”, you praise, trailing your kisses to his neck instead.
Jungkook sucks in air through his teeth and shivers. 
"Good", he whispers and sighs.
Good that means he stops worrying again. In one swift movement, you slip your hand inside his pants and begin running it up and down his terribly swollen cock.
“Oh my god”, he gasps and reaches for your wrist with both hands.
You lift your head, making eye contact with him for only a second and then he looks to the side in embarrassment.
“How’s that Kook?”
“Mh-hm”, is all he can get out and then he feels so embarrassed about the entire situation that he has to close his eyes.
“Relax sweets, your reactions are perfect”, you assure him, watching him peel his eyes open, “there we go, you’re doing so well. I’ll start with the blowjob now, alright?”
He is still looking to the side but he nods his head vigorously.
"Yes? Can you tell me that you want it?" 
"I, I want it", he whispers shyly. 
"You are so perfect", you praise, lowering your lips to his chest. You begin kissing him, starting on his pecs and drawing them down his torso like perfectly placed paint strokes. You linger on his lower stomach just that little bit longer, eliciting the sweetest of sounds from him. 
He is so sensitive. It tickles but he doesn’t want it to stop or flee from it. That tickle feels different than normal ones, it starts wherever you kiss him and then goes straight down to his cock. It actually reaches such intensity that he soon wants to reach down and cup his cock just so he could relieve some of that pressure. 
"More please", he asks quietly. 
You answer him by shimmy down his body and sitting down between his legs. Your hands are resting on his hips, fingers hooked in the hem of his pants. 
"Lift your butt for me", you say and Jungkook obeys. 
His pants leave his body easily, landing somewhere on his bed. Holy moly. Jungkook is gawking at you with scared eyes, looking between his exposed cock and your face. He is naked. Completely buttnaked. Do you like it? Do you think that he is too small, too big? Does he smell weird? Wait, did he make sure to wash his dick today? Yeah, he did. Or did he? Oh no, Jungkook can’t remember if he did. Do you not like it?
“Wow Jungkook, your cock is so perfect”, you gasp, taking it between your fingers to jerk it off slowly.
Jungkook’s mind shuts up immediately. Warm electricity shoots through his dick.
“Ah”, he lets out, mouth falling open in bliss.
“I can’t wait to taste it”, you taunt, drawing closer and closer. You lock eyes with him and stick your tongue out. One last playful smirk and then you finally flick it over his cockhead.
“Hngng”, Jungkook mewls, ripping his eyes open widely. He grows restless within seconds, legs squirming on the mattress.
“So delicious”, you rasp, taking in his tip and sucking slowly.
“Ah”, Jungkook moans loudly, throwing his hand over his mouth quickly. He seems devastated, as if he just committed a crime with the moan, “sorry”, he whispers, tearing up.
“Don’t apologize. Your noises are perfect. Just let them out, don’t be shy”, you tell him, rewarding him by sinking down his length again. You let it glide over your tongue until it tickles the back of your throat.
“Ah, ah”, he muffles most of the noise with his hand but you heard it nonetheless.
You answer him with a hungry moan, bopping your head up and down his length. You make sure to fondle his balls while you do it, drawing skilled circles on them with your thumb.
“I-I can’t stop – ah!” Jungkook stutters before he moans, dropping his head in the pillow and keeping his mouth agape, “ah, ah, ha, ah”, the noises leave him freely eventhough they make his cheeks literally burn up in embarrassment. He twists the sheets as he squirms and shakes, having his eyes squeezed shut so tightly that the corners of them are creasing.
“There we go, you’re so sexy for me”, you encourage him, flicking your tongue over his tip for a little, running your left hand up and down his shaft in slow strokes. You make sure to time the swirls of your tongue with one skilled movement of your thumb each time it reaches his sensitive tip.
Jungkook throws his hand over his mouth, letting out a cute squeak. You encourage him to give you more by taking him into your mouth again, sucking on his cock. You can feel his balls tighten, tasting his precum on your tongue. Oh Jungkook lets out the prettiest of moans, rolling his head to the side.
“Feels so good…”
You begin moving your head up and down while you suck on him, starting off slow but becoming faster gradually. Jungkook starts off with excited little pants before shy squeaks replace them. He hits the mattress beside his hips, legs shaking all on their own.
“Please”, he squeaks, burying his face in his hands. This feels so good and he is going to cum. Jungkook feels so embarrassed about it, but somehow doesn’t want you to stop.
“Just let go sweets”, you encourage him, returning to the rhythm afterwards. You roll his balls between your fingers, jerking off the parts you can’t get into your mouth and swallow around him.
“Eeh!” he squeaks then gasps and tenses. Then you feel it, his cum shooting down your throat and his cock pulsating in your mouth. Jungkook lets out a surprisingly deep growl, arching his back off the mattress. He shakes three times then drops his back rather aggressively, throwing his hands over his face to hide away.
“I’m sorry”, he presses out.
You let go of his cock, giving it one last kiss.
Jungkook sobs.
“Hey sweets, why are you crying?” you gasp, cradling him in your arms safely.
“I-I s-sorry. S-sorry”, he hiccups, shuddering in a sob. He is so embarrassed.
“For what? You did amazing.”
“I-I ruined it.”
“You didn’t. Why do you think that?”
“You, you didn’t even cum. And there, there w-was no s-sex.”
“Kook”, you brush his tears away, “we’ve been having sex ever since we started touching each other. Sex doesn’t always mean penetration. It’s about making the other feel nice. Don’t be ashamed about cumming too soon. This is your first time after all, you did amazing.”
“Really?” he looks at you shyly. He sniffles but doesn’t cry anymore.
“Yeah, it was so hot”, you smile at him, “did you like it?”
He nods his head, “so much”, he whispers and giggles shyly, “thank you so much, I feel so, so good”, he confesses and hugs you.
“I’m glad you do”, you give his cheek a gentle pinch.
He looks at you with sparkly eyes.
“Do you wanna have more?” you ask him.
He blushes, “maybe”, he whispers.
“Yes? Do you wanna make me feel good until your cock’s good to go again?”
“Yes”, he says in complete awe.
“Yeah? Something you want to try out on me?”
He blushes, lowering his gaze. He touches his own lips before he giggles.
“Do you want to eat me out too?”
“Yes”, he whispers and hides his face in your chest in shyness.  
“Okay that’s really hot, I’m down”, you say and roll on your back.
Jungkook watches in awe as you take off your pants and then spread your legs. He is staring at your face almost obsessively with his eyes big.
“You’re allowed to look”, you tell him and watch as Jungkook sneaks one not so sneaky look down at your core.
He does a quick double take before finally looking properly. His mouth falls open, hands rubbing up and down his own thighs.
“This is what a pussy looks like?” he gasps, crawling between your legs to get a better look. His eyes run over it in wonder.
“You look like you are seeing your first ever pussy”, you joke, but the look that Jungkook gives you lets you know that you weren’t even that far from the truth, “no way, you are. Aren’t you?”
He begins blushing.
“Seriously? So no porn?”
“I tried watching it once, but I felt really uncomfortable”, he confesses.
“Wow, okay. That’s so rare”, you say, making him lower his eyes in embarrassment, “but totally valid. You’re so hot, sweets.”
Jungkook giggles, looking less nervous in an instant. He lets his eyes land on your pussy again, features morphing into that of awe.
"It's so pretty", he whispers, "and so wet." 
"Yeah, I know that means I'm really turned on", you explain to him. 
"Oh I see...really?" he looks into your eyes. 
"Yes Kook, really. You make me really wet." 
He snorts very ungracefully and laughs quietly before throwing his hand over his mouth and widening his eyes. 
"Sorry, that was a weird laugh." 
"It wasn’t, you’re really cute", you assure him. 
"I, I wasn’t laughing at you. Please don’t t-think that. It’s so weird to hear you talk so sexy t-that's why I laughed. Not that I don’t like it! Please don’t think that", he babbles, blushing vividly. 
"Kook, you’re aight. Don’t worry", you give him a smile. 
"Okay", he says in a breathy laugh, letting his eyes fall back to your pussy. He stares at it, licking his lips almost hungrily.
“Taste her whenever you are ready Kook”, you encourage him.
Jungkook sticks his tongue out and presses it against your core. He just rests it there, hot and wet. Then he pulls back again, smacking his lips.
“Mhm, yummy”, he decides, cracking you up, “what?”
“Nothing, this is just the first time someone smacks his lips and goes mhm yummy after pressing his tongue against my pussy”, you explain in a chuckle.
“Oh, sorry”, he blushes.
“It’s alright, it’s cute”, you pet his hair, “go on, try her again.”
Jungkook is eager to please, sticking his tongue out and connecting the tip of it with your pussy. He flicks it up and down, doing so rather softly.
“A little closer”, you tell him.
Jungkook scoots closer, adding more tongue. He keeps the slow rhythm going, eyes glued to your face to see if you look pleased. You look really happy according to him. Your eyes are so pretty now that you look at him and give him a smile.
“Give my clit more licks.”
Jungkook furrows his brows in confusion. It is obvious that he has no idea where exactly your clit is located. You tug on his hair gently, guiding his mouth further up your pussy until you feel his tongue on your clit.
“There”, you sigh, eyelids fluttering, “it’s right there.”
To your dismay Jungkook lifts his head, looking at your pussy.
“Can you show me? So I know how it looks” he asks with a little bit more confidence in his voice. This is so typical Jungkook. You give him something new to try out and he is so eager to learn and improve himself that he completely forgets about his shyness.
You part your folds with your fingers and run your pointer finger over your clit. It feels good, but you really miss his tongue.
“It’s this little part right here. The area around it and right on it is especially sensitive and it feels really good when you touch or lick it”, you explain, drawing slow circles. Jungkook watches with his brows furrowed in serious concentration. He nods his head.
“I got it. It’s so pretty. Small but so important, I like it a lot.”
You give him a lazy chuckle. He is truly so endearing.
Jungkook takes over for you, keeping your folds parted with his fingers. He connects his tongue with the area you showed him and mimics the movements your finger made. Slow circles all over your clit and her surrounding skin.
“Holy fuck” you can’t help but swear, dropping your head into the pillow and gasping for air. Jungkook hit the nail right on its head. Or in your case nailed your clit right with his tongue. It is warm, it is wet, it is so soft and at the perfect spot, “Jungkook”, you moan his name.
Jungkook makes a shy sound and speeds up just a little.
“Ah!” you squeak and flinch. Hot electricity shoots through your pussy. In an instant you pull his head away, confusing him.
Your eyes meet, his lips glisten in your juices.
“Okay what the fuck Kook?” you pant, “you seriously almost made me cum in like ten seconds.”
He blinks his eyes at you, cheeks heating up.
“Really?” he asks shyly.
“Yeah, what the hell?”
He giggles, lowering his eyes, “w-why did you stop me?”
“Because…I don’t know, I wanna have it longer.”
“Should I lick at other parts? O-or what do I have to do to make it last longer?”
You smile because his eagerness to learn is sweet but also sexy.
“Yes, that sounds good. Give my clit a few licks every now and then and it’ll help make it last longer.”
“Got it”, he says and connects his mouth with your pussy again. He dances his tongue through your folds for now, watching your face for a reaction.
“Yes Kook, yes”, you sigh and moan, closing your eyes.
He mewls softly and stays at your entrance. He licks at it as if he was eating a popsicle, making shy sounds of approval because he very obviously liked the taste of you. His hips are grinding into the mattress, his fingers are squeezing your thighs. Also, he has eyes closed for now, furrowing his brows in bliss.
“That’s it sweets”, you moan, floating on cloud nine.
Jungkook opens his eyes again and dances his tongue up your pussy. For only a second he lifts his head, parting your pussy with his fingers again before connecting his tongue with your clit. He starts off a little too far to the right but corrects it naturally, one flick later and you have his warm, skilled tongue grinding up and down on your sensitive bundle of nerves.
“Yes, ah – yes”, you moan and gasp, relaxing and closing your fingers around a bundle of his soft hair rhythmically, “yes, Kook, Jungkook, ah yes.”
Jungkook, that perfect amazing man, moves down your pussy, making your approaching high die down so lovely that you feel like melting. He begins licking up the new droplets of your arousal at your entrance, sneaking a quick glance at your face and grinding his hips into the mattress again.
He will never get this view out of his head. You on his bed, completely naked and with your face contorted in pleasure. Your stomach looks so pretty and your boobies aren’t as round as when you sit up, but Jungkook likes how they look like when you lie down nonetheless, they look so soft and he wants to hold them. So he does. He reaches up with his left arm and gathers your breast to squeeze it softly.
“Yes, do that”, you encourage him, voice cracking at the beginning.
Jungkook squeezes it repeatedly, accidentally pressing down on your entrance too much and making his tongue slip in. He gasps, watching you part your lips in a deep moan. You are even warmer like this and you taste stronger. Jungkook slips his tongue free, swallowing down the massive amount of saliva in his mouth and with it your sweet taste.
"So tasty", he whispers more to himself than to you. He connects his tongue with your clit again afterwards, hand on your breast stilling because it is impossible to multitask now that he begins touching your entrance with his finger in curiosity. But you don’t mind, he is still holding your boob safely and the finger playing with your juices feels so nice that all you can do is roll your hips up and moan his name.
Jungkook slips inside on accident, gasping right with you.
“I’m going fucking insane, that’s amazing”, you moan shakily.
Jungkook mewls, grinding into the mattress with more vigour. You are so warm and wet and tight around his finger. This feels so good. Is this how it feels around his dick? How should he ever be able to fuck you when it feels like that?
Jungkook moves his finger in and out of you, feeling you tighten. 
You whimper his name, grasping his hair with your other hand as well, “right there”, you squeak out and tighten even more.
Jungkook doesn’t know what to make of all of this. This is so sexy, it turns him on like nothing else, he feels so good. It overwhelms him so much that he feels his eyes tear up in utter gratefulness. He closes them before he can cry and licks at your clit more eagerly.
You clench around his finger, flinching into his mouth.
“I’m gonna fucking cum”, you groan, arching your back.
Jungkook mewls, speeding up his tongue and finger all while giving your boob a squeeze. This is all you needed.
“Jungkook”, you cum with a loud moan, feeling it all the way down to your toes. It spreads from your pussy in hot spurts of electricity, the kind that makes it hard to concentrate on anything other than how fucking incredible it feels. You didn’t have that type of orgasm in such a long time and definitely not with another person. You blame it on the feelings you have for Jungkook and how good he makes you feel, but holy fuck this is going to haunt you in the most inappropriate of moments.
Jungkook is so far gone, whimpering and squeaking as he licks and sucks on your clit like there is no tomorrow, he pumps his finger in and out of you quickly, blinded by the feeling of you pulsating because of him. And while it felt fucking incredible while you were cumming, now that overstimulation sets in, it feels like too much.
“Slow Kook, slow”, you groan, pulling at his hair, “g-give me a break.”
Jungkook lifts his head groggily, locking his sparkly eyes on yours obsessively. His cheeks are so pink, his chin and swollen lips are covered in your orgasm. He looks so eager to please you more and more.
“This was incredible”, you say, “I’m serious, I haven’t cum like this like ever.”
“Woah, are you serious?” he gasps, mouth falling open.
“Totally”, you say and drop into the pillow. You let out a disbelieved laugh, rubbing your hands over your face, “I’m fucking fucked Kook. Phew”, you exhale loudly.
Jungkook shimmies up your body and lies down next to you. Propped up on his elbow, he drapes an arm across your chest. You open your eyes.
“So I’m the best you ever had?” he asks, acting slightly cocky.
You chuckle fondly, “now, now Mister. You’re growing cocky”, you tease him, pinching his cheek.
He blushes and just like this, his shy demeanour returns.
“I’m sorry, I just feel proud because I made you feel good.”
“Mhm”, you trace his cheekbone, “you can feel proud, you were the best.”
Jungkook giggles.
“How did you like it? Was it how you imagined it to be?”
He shakes his head, “it was better. I imagined pussy to taste like candy just like Ariana Grande says, but it doesn’t. It still tastes really good eventhough it doesn’t taste like candy so don’t worry. I want to do it a lot in the future.”
You grin. You are pretty sure that you don’t just have a crush on him by now, but that you are actually head over heels in love with him.
“I’m happy you liked it. Do you want your reward now?”
“T-there is a reward?” he gasps.
“Of course there is. Your cock’s good to go again and I wanna ride it.”
“Oh god”, his cheeks glow red immediately, “you say so much sexy stuff.”
“I know”, you grin, “go on sweets, lie down for me.”
Jungkook obeys, giggling in excitement for what was to come.
You get to your knees and reach for a condom.
“Do you want to put it on for me?” you ask him, handing it to him.
“I’ll try, I never did it. Do I have to hold the tip?”
“Yep and then just roll it down smoothly.”
Jungkook follows your instructions.
“That’s it, you’re a natural. How does it feel? Does it pinch or feel too loose?”
“No it’s comfortable, I don’t really feel it.”
“Perfect.”
You and him exchange a look. You just have to touch his face again. You can’t help it, you are so obsessed with it.
“I’m gonna fuck you so well now, Jungkook”, you whisper.
“___ please”, he breathes and mewls.
“Do you want me to fuck you?”
He nods his head vigorously.
“I can’t hear you sweets.”
“Yes”, he whispers, tensing his body in anticipation.
“There we go, good boy”, you praise, climbing on his lap and sitting down on his thigh.
He tenses up and looks down.
“Do you feel how wet I am?”
“Y-yeah”, he presses out, breathing speeding up.
"I know, that's what you do to me sweets. Your mouth made me so, so wet for you." 
"That's so sexy, oh my god", he whispers, feeling his cock twitch.
You give him two grinds up and down his thigh then lift your hips. You grab his cock by its base, stroking it through your folds.
“Oh god, oh god, oh god”, he chants, covering his face behind his hands. He is so excited and nervous and excited.
“Look at me Kook.”
Jungkook tries to obey, brows furrowed and teeth biting down on his lower lip so hard it appears white on some parts.
“You can cum whenever you feel like it. There is no pressure to last long, okay?”
He nods his head.
“Now place your hands on my hips.”
Jungkook holds them tightly, eyes flitting to your core. This is it. The moment he dreamt of ever since he was twenty two. The moment which will turn him from an inexperienced boy to a real man. And to top it all off, he is experiencing it with the one person he had hoped he could experience it with. He is so excited that he could burst.
You sink down on him. Jungkook’s face goes from shock to confusion to surprise until it finally lands on what can only be described as blissed-out epiphany.
He groans loudly, dropping his head and staring at the ceiling with big eyes.
You bottom out. 
"Wait, wait, ah wait", he stutters. 
You caress his pecs, studying his face. 
"I just need to bask in it for a moment."
He takes a deep breath, furrowing his brows in the distinct Jungkook way.
"Holy cow, I’m not a virgin anymore…"
He makes you laugh and so you lean down to kiss his cheek. When you lift your head just enough to look at his face you realise that he is gazing at you.
"It's nice, isn't it?" 
He nods his head vigorously, "it's so warm." 
"Right? You feel really good inside, you fill me out so well." 
"Oh?" he blushes but doesn’t break eye contact, "y-you fit around me so nice" he giggles, "was that sexy?" 
"Yes Kook, it was sexy." 
"Okay, uhm. You are so warm and squeeze me so much, I feel really good", he attempts to talk dirty, ending it with a cute giggle and a shy look down. 
You chuckle lazily and straighten up again. 
"I'm glad you do, sweets", you rasp and put slight pressure on his chest, beginning moving.
"Oh go- fuck", Jungkook’s face contorts in utter pleasure, eyes falling closed and lips parting. He is squirming so much, panting uncontrollably all whilst squeaking.
You lean in, weaving your fingers in his hair.
“That’s how it feels like Kook”, you rasp, circling your hips when he is all the way inside of you, “that’s how sex feels like baby.”
"Don't stop", he keens and hooks his arms behind your head, pressing out a pathetically hoarse moan afterwards. He can’t think. He can’t breathe. He is also sure that he doesn’t live anymore. His soul left his body and all there is left is his dick and your warm walls around him. How should he ever feel anything else and go “yep that’s good” when he knows how pussy feels? He decided. Pussy is the endgame and he is happy that he played and won.
“Do you like it Kookie?” you ask, tickling his ear with your lips.
“Ye”, he brings out and then he moans again, scratching down your back in an attempt to hold you tighter, "so much, I like so much", he mewls, throbbing inside of you.
“Fuck, baby”, you moan, speeding your hips up at the slight pain of his scratches. You twist your fingers in his hair, make sure that you squeeze your pussy around him and press your tits against his chest, making his nipples rub against them. 
Jungkook lets out a gurgled moan, following it up with a high-pitched “oh my god.”
He shakes and trembles, whimpering your name all while squeezing tears out of his closed eyes. His cock is so hard inside of you, throbbing uncontrollably. You know that he is close. You have known ever since you sank down on him. Good, you want him to cum. It’s what he deserves. 
You add skilled rolls back and forth to your bounces, making sure that his cockhead would hit your g-spot each time you bottom out. You can still have some fun, even if this right here is all about him. And Jungkook is giving you a hell lot of fun. He has the perfect length and girth and curve to make each bounce feel like heaven. 
"I can't ah - oh - eeh please ___", he stutters and pants, hands running over your back vigorously in search of support. 
“You know it Kook, just cum whenever you want”, you pant, connecting your ass with his thighs in fast bounces, "just cum for me baby, let go." 
Jungkook lets out a loud moan, pressing his head into the pillow so aggressively that it makes his shoulders arch off the mattress. This feels different than it did when you gave him a blowjob. While that one began on his tip, this right here makes his stomach tighten and his cock throb and he has literally no idea where it begins. Maybe everywhere. Jungkook sobs your name, arching his back. Oh god, he is going to cum so hard.
“That’s it baby, let go for me”, you rasp.
And he does. Jungkook feels his body spiral out of complete control. It happens automatically that he reaches for your hips and stills their movements only for his own to begin slamming up into you. And you let him, watching his face contort into the prettiest of expressions all whilst moaning his name over and over again. Jungkook needs eight hard thrusts and then he drops into the mattress, whimpering shakily.
He is breathing quickly, whimpering the entire time. So cute. You just have to lean down and kiss his pretty face all over.
“My pretty boy, you’re my pretty baby, oh Kookie”, you whisper, kissing his tears away, “did you have fun, baby?”
“Yes”, he presses out, still catching his breath.
You giggle and straighten up, helping him slip out of you and discarding the condom for him. You make sure to place his very sensitive cock down carefully, leaning down to give it one kiss. You have no idea why you did that, you have never done this to anyone before, but Jungkook makes you feel so good that you just want to keep kissing him.
You kiss up his torso next until you finally trail them up his neck.
He turns his head slowly, peeling his eyes open to gaze at you.
“Thank you so much”, he whispers, voice raspy in strain. He tears up, “this is the best day of my life.”
“Mine too Kookie.”
"I'm sorry I didn’t last long." 
"There's nothing to apologize for. Nobody lasts long during their first time and you were amazing."
"Will it get better? I-I don’t want it to always be over so fast."
"Yes baby, it'll get easier." 
"Did you cum too?" 
"No, but that’s alright. Tonight was about you." 
"I'm sorry, I'll do better next time", he whispers.
"I know you will Kookie", you whisper and caress his cheek.
He smiles droopily, you retort it.
“Are we a couple now?” he asks hopefully.
“I mean”, you lower your gaze shyly, “I would say that we are. You?”
He nods his head, “I wanna be your boyfriend.”
“Good, cause I wanna be your girlfriend.”
You and him giggle happily. So you’re a couple now. This is truly the best day ever.
“I wanna have so much sex with you”, he confesses confidently.
 “Yeah?” you fluster slightly.
“Yeah. C-can we? It’s so, so much fun.”
“Of course baby, we’re only getting started.”​
3K notes · View notes
loon4joon · a month ago
Text
✉ REQUEST ✉ // NAMJOON FUCKS HIS STUDENT
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>> F.READER//CHEATING//SMUT//PROFESSOR!NAMJOON//STUDENT!READER//DESK SEX//FINGERING//MAKING OUT//HINT OF AFTERCARE//MENTIONS OF DIVORCE//RAW SEX//CREAMPIE//HANDJOB//2.8k <<
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Namjoon knew you were staring.
He didn't mind at all; though he did sometimes wonder what was going through your head for your dimples to pop out as you grinned from ear to ear.
Or sometimes bite your lip and screw your eyes shut after you mouthed a swear word.
Either way, Namjoon couldn’t contain the smile on his lips.
“Thinking about something good ?”
His voice broke you out of your daze, while he remained in his position, checking through your paper while you stood beside him, hands behind your back.
He glanced up at you, to see you blinking at him with an open mouth.
“I-“
There was no time to answer, the sound of his phone ringing somehow interrupting you but also saving your ass.
Phew. No way to explain that your daydream consisted of him picking you up and fucking you on the desk he was working on.
It alarmed you seeing his eyes roll once he glanced at his caller ID, although you could only wait patiently as he excused himself to leave the room. “I’ll be a minute Y/N.”
You nodded at him as he rushed past you, a strained what leaving his mouth just before he shut the door behind him.
The couple minutes of you standing diligently while you could hear the definite annoyance through your professor’s voice, left you wondering if asking him to read through your essay was a good choice.
Maybe, now wasn’t the right time-
A loud sigh met your ears after the slamming of the office door - turning to stumble upon the face of an obviously stressed man.
“Erm…” you licked your lips, “would you like me to leave ?” Hands bunched into tight fists beside your body, it struck Namjoon that you may have heard every second of his conversation; ultimately becoming awkward after knowing the contents.
“What ?” He slightly paused while walking, only to shake his head and carry on. “No, of course not.”
Finally sitting down again with another relieving sigh leaving his mouth, Namjoon picked up your papers while you noticed the tension in the silent room go from 0-100.
Oh fuck. You despised uncomfortable situations like these.
If only you decided to come another day, you wouldn’t haven’t encountered - what it seemed like - a heated argument between husband and wife.
If only you weren’t so uncertain about your work, you wouldn’t come to ask your professor to go over it.
If only you didn't open your big mouth, you wouldn’t be undergoing the absolutely embarrassing moment of Mr Kim staring at you as if you were naked.
The words of are you ok repeated through Namjoon’s ears several times before he could actually muster up a reply. To be honest, he was speechless.
“Wow.” Removing his glasses, he took a second to shut his eyes before smiling widely at you.
“I don’t believe I’ve been asked about my well-being for a good 3 months.” He squinted his eyes while scoffing.
“I just- you.” You stopped yourself before you could make it worse, deciding to focus on the ground which you wished would swallow you up right now.
“It’s ok,” the genuine tone evident, “I appreciate it a lot Y/N. Thanks for your concern towards me.”
“Don’t thank me.” It mainly came out in one whole breath - Namjoon chuckling in reply when you proceeded to try and comfort him. “Things must be hard sir, but they’ll get better.” He got the hint that you were referring to the phone call you most certainly overheard, although he couldn’t blame you.
“Do things get better from finding your wife with another man in her bed ?”
The disgust on your face when he finished speaking kinda amused him, although he made sure to reassure you in not worrying.
“We’re getting a divorce anyway, but she’s just being a difficult woman currently.” He turned a page over now, paying you no attention while you were starstruck.
“Mr Kim, I’m so sorry.” Never had you ever actually known somebody who’d experienced such a thing, your remorse and horror towards the unfortunate event being obvious as it disturbed you how normal he was acting.
“What are you apologising for ?” Gaping up at your standing self, Namjoon dropped the items in his hands only to focus fully on you now.
“Because no one deserves that. Especially not you sir.”
Hoping he knew you were stating only the truth, it began to make total sense as to why his personality had changed in the last couple of months.
When Mr Kim arrived, he was the new, hot and young professor, making both teachers and students swoon over him. Not only his attractive looks, he was approachable to all while being friendly and having a great attitude towards his subject: English literature.
His sudden change of character where he turned more dismissive and less enthusiastic was spotted by anybody who paid close attention to him. You were part of anybody.
“Well it gladdens me to know you care for me. At least one person does.”
Watching as his small smile turned into a frown, your hand naturally reached out to him, resting on to his clenched fist.
The soft touch startled Namjoon, instantly feeling at ease once he saw your comforting grin.
It wasn’t a total secret that you may or may not have had a crush on him. Namjoon would just have to be totally oblivious to your sweet stares and smiles. Or the fact that he’s accidentally caught you scribble his name on the back of a piece of paper; hearts and doodles all to be seen around Mr Kim.
“Of course, sir.” It was a reflex, hand wrapping around his, yet when you were just about to pull it back - realising that maybe you were overstepping a boundary - Namjoon’s palm lay over yours.
The silence was loud as the pair of you refused to break eye contact.
You didn’t know what to call it, but the emotion in his gaze was hard to name. Similarly, he could say the same about you; a strand of your hair beginning to bug him as he moved near to you; extending his finger and tucking the piece behind your ear.
And that was it. He’d crossed the line.
There was no time to hold back, suddenly in two minds before your lips had crashed on his after he was inches away from your face when fixing your hair.
Oddly, there was no sign of reluctance as he reciprocated your passion - kissing you harder with more intensity as you had to grip on his shoulders to keep yourself steady.
“Fuck.” You muttered when withdrawing, removing your hands from him when you comprehended what just happened.
You kissed your professor. And he’s married.
“Shit, I’m-“ Namjoon’s mouth was already connected to you as he hurried out of his seat to hold your cheeks in his palms, urgency on show. Your head was empty; mind only full of his eagerness towards you as he stayed smooching you.
Instinctively, your two bodies moved towards a surface to lean on - the nearest his desk - as your hands latched on the edge to keep you stable. Both of you were busy snogging away, chests bumping into each other while his glasses began to become a nuisance for him.
“I’m sorry.” He grinned, withdrawing from you to remove his glasses.
Your mouth was open as he gaped back at you, no noise filling the other’s ears apart from the panting after the rush and excitement you both felt.
“We- I-“
“Forgive me,” he’d taken a couple of steps back; ensuring there was a couple metres distance between you two, “I- I don't know what I was thinking.”
Surely, he didn’t think it was a mistake ? Yeah, it would’ve been amazing under better circumstances - like if he didn’t have a wife - however it felt good.
“Do you regret it ?” The crestfallen tone of yours immediately made Namjoon jump to correct you.
“No !” He ran a hand through his hair, clutching on to the pair of glasses in his free hand before tutting. “I’m your professor and you’re my student. I just-“
“I’m an adult. And so are you.”
Namjoon was in a dilemma. Sure, he’d enjoyed having your lips on his, but that’s not the point. Though he knew it was wrong, it felt so good.
“But-“
“You know what. Maybe I should go.” You didn’t know what you were doing, aware that you’d left your assignment with him and would have to come face to face with him soon anyway. But for now you didn’t want to embarrass yourself any further; brushing past him and nearly leaving till he called out your name.
“Lock the door.”
“You sure ?” The little intake of breath didn’t go hidden by Namjoon, turning to see his hands on his hips as he poked his tongue at his inner cheek - a look of vengeance expressed on his face.
That alone was all you needed to turn the round knob and ensure you heard the click of the door locking.
“Come here.” You practically ran to him, legs wrapping around him as he heaved your body up onto him.
It was as if you were hungry for one another, tongues already in each other’s mouths and hands travelling to all the right places.
You didn’t know Namjoon was a moaner, however setting your ass on his desk with your pelvis directly hitting his crotch, legs wrapped tightly around his frame as you clutched onto his arms with your fingers; feeling the contact made a vibration resound from his mouth onto yours.
“Y/N.” He withdrew, hands still stuck on your hips with both of your breaths hitting the others lips while grinning at the feeling of your heartbeats increasing.
“Do you really want to do this ?” His forehead came in to contact with yours; thumb swiping across your bottom lip and eyelids shutting once your thighs clenched on either side of him.
“I do.” You breathed out, edging closer to peck him gently - teasingly dragging your lips until he held your jaw, lightly in place.
“Is this okay ?” His husky voice so near to your ear, was driving you insane but you could only nod as he continued. “Are you giving me your full consent to fuck you ?”
Hearing such an explicit word from his lips had your pussy throbbing as you gulped before replying. “Yes.”
The once thoughtful gaze which turned to lust had you bite your lips when Namjoon unhurriedly took off his blazer, biceps bulging through his shirt.
“I’m gonna make sure you don’t regret this.”
Oh you were certain you weren’t.
Watching him work with his zipper indicated to you to get started on your skirt, although the hand on yours prevented you from doing so.
“There’s no need.” Namjoon muttered, inching nearer to trail a set of kisses on your neck while standing in between your legs. He was able to unhook his cock through the unzipped part of his trousers; the pure sight of his throbbing head making you gasp from first glance.
His cocky chuckle was hot, nonetheless, as his lips - along with his tongue - stayed showing love to your exposed chest, the faint skim of two fingers setting aside your almost soaked panties felt so smooth to you, until the abrupt plunge of two fingers inside of your hole (that wasn’t exactly at its loosest) made you whimper.
“Mmmph.” You’d pulled him so close to you to hide your face in the croak of his neck, Namjoon simply shushing you as your arms fastened around his shoulder.
He was quick to leave your puckered hole as fast as his fingers entered, smearing the wetness to make things easier for him. You’d be lying if you said he didn’t know what he was doing though. His thumb, so effortlessly pressing on your clit at just the right pressure as his digits worked in and out of you; body becoming limp at how skilfully he had you go from mewling in slight discomfort to moaning in utter pleasure.
Namjoon could feel he was fully hard merely from satisfying you and even if he wasn’t getting gratified at the same time, being able to have his eyes feast on you undoing yourself in front of him was enough.
Your body was only tilting backwards, arms detaching themselves from him as you planted your palms on either side of your weak self - opening your screwed shut lids to meet his cock calling your name.
He smirked, spotting your eyes lingering up and down from his own to the show that eventually ended up taking your whole attention. Namjoon’s lips that adorned a wide grin changed to his mouth dropping open when you brought your thumb to his slit, spreading his pre-cum while keeping eye contact.
Giving in, his eyes fell down to your hands fisting his length; successfully bringing him delight by jacking him off while playing with his exposed balls by adding the perfect touch of squeezing when he least expected it.
“I- I don’t want to cum yet.” Those words were the last you anticipated to hear from Namjoon, his shaky breath making you go a little slower while you understood it was more of a warning when he separated both your hands from the other.
The whine which met his ears altered into a loud moan after Namjoon swiftly thrusted his dick in to your desperate hole in replacement of his index and middle finger.
“Fuck.” Both of you cursed under your breath when he penetrated you at ease after doing a good job of making your pussy accustomed to his large size.
“Don’t you dare pull out…” you groaned through sounds of joy, “I’m on the pill.” Head falling back when Namjoon clutched on to the bottom of your thighs to have his cock hit you deeper.
“Yeah,” his thrusts increased at your words, balls smacking against your cunt as you uttered sinful words at the sensation of him pounding into you, “I can’t wait for you to cum all over my cock baby.”
“Can you do that for me Y/N ?” His breathing turning heavy only meant he was close as his fingers dug into you.
The same could be said for you; Namjoon asking you such a question snapping the orgasm in your stomach, as you screamed out in gratification.
“Yes, yes !” Namjoon wouldn’t put an end to fucking you, body losing it’s balance and essentially crushing you while his dick continued to shove into you.
“That’s it, cum baby.” His grunts got quieter as he gradually halted his movements, only to hover over you and steady himself by keeping his weight on his palms that rested on both sides of your head.
Your body was still, pussy throbbing around his pulsating cock as all you could feel was the numbness between your legs.
“Ugh.” The two of you were a mess, Namjoon also wincing when pulling out of you; the remaining juices that left your hole amusing him for a second till he grabbed a tissue and wiped it up delicately. Flinching from the feeling, you let out a tiny whimper, finding it extremely difficult to lift up your head from your lying position.
You could hear his zipper and an appeasing exhale - a smile appearing on your face until he clapped his hands together.
“Okay, let’s get you up.” It was clear to him you were worn out so he was understanding enough to help hoist your upper half from its previous posture until you were sitting up - of course with your hands enclasped around his neck.
He’d sorted both your underwear and skirt out like the gentleman he was; the only jumbled thing about you, your hair. The chuckle that left his mouth was sweet while he sorted the messy strands as you gazed at him like he was a sort of prize, a grin on your mouth.
“You must be giddy.” Namjoon acknowledged that you were probably feeling afterglow; beaming at your happy self.
“That was the best sex I’ve ever had.”
He immediately laughed, the sound bringing glee to your ears.
“Thank you, I guess.” He scrunched his nose while biting his lip, squeezing on your hips.
“Can I ask you a question though ?” There was a hint of hesitation behind your words, Namjoon squinting at you for a second before smiling to reassure you.
“Sure.”
“Why the hell would your wife cheat on you ?”
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⊰loon4joon’s masterlist⊱ + feedback please <3
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onlyswan · 4 months ago
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summary: in which jungkook is team not okay for the perilla leaf debate.
> fluff / wc: 1.6k
> warnings: kinda suggestive at the end ? you’ll see ehehe
note: watching this the other day made me laugh so much but also made me so miserable because jungkook is the jealous type of boyfriend of course he is what do i do with this information but to write a drabble to calm myself down but i don’t think it fucking worked i just want to scream into a void forever. enjoy :]
“just how many times do you need to watch it?” jungkook whines, burying his face in the crook of your neck and pulling your body closer by the waist.
his warm breath tickling your skin only makes you giggle much harder, clutching your phone tighter in one hand in fear of it falling on your face (not a good experience. -10/10). the other is too busy with playing with his fluffy hair, as it usually is almost every night in bed. his head was resting on your arm forty minutes ago, but he inched closer and closer to your neck the further you got into watching their recently uploaded content on youtube.
your boyfriend is dedicating his time, energy, efforts, talents — hell, his whole being to his job. and with all your heart, you love and respect him immensely.
you wait until the very end of the award shows to watch the performances the group has prepared for weeks, and months, prior. (ah, he’s always so excited for your reaction. so much so he refrains from giving you spoilers about the songs and concepts because he wants to surprise you, too.) you watch the interviews and praise him for perfectly saying the answers he practiced with you. and yes, you do randomly watch bangtan bombs and his reaction to tasting a lemon donut is ingrained in your brain for life.
a defeated sigh. and yes, you are secretly longing to watch run bts every tuesday again, but you don’t tell him that yet.
today, you find yourself having fun watching the group explore their mbti types. personally, you don’t think the theory should be relied on too much because humans are way too complex to be categorized by a few letters, but you still find it fun and interesting. it opens up discussions and shows the fascinating differences of the people sitting in the room, which happened exactly in the two episodes.
you love seeing different sides of jungkook. just like how there are sides of jungkook that come out only when he’s with you, there are also sides of him that only come out when he’s interacting with other people. therefore, you still discover new things about your boyfriend everyday.
the jungkook in the bonus clip discussing the famous perilla leaf controversy, however, is the jungkook you know all too well.
“they can’t help.”
“no. just no.”
“so basically, would it annoy you or not?”
“of course it would.”
you see, his unwavering opinion on the topic sounds awfully similar to a particular someone’s reaction from a few months ago.
“hey babe, have you heard of the perilla leaf debate?” you casually asked jungkook one lazy afternoon while scrolling through your phone, your head laying on his lap. he was leaning against the headboard on the edge of the bed, while your body horizontally occupied the rest of the space. this is your usual position when you feel like doing nothing at all.
“huh?” he tore his attention away from the television to clear his confusion, lowering the volume as he spoke. “a debate about perilla leaf? is it like mintcho and pineapples on pizza?”
“no, no. the debate isn’t about the perilla leaf exactly.” you started explaining to him, still scrolling through the comments that read different opinions of bored social media users. “okay so, the scenario is we go out to eat with one of your friends. and then your friend struggles with separating perilla leaves, so i help them do it. is that okay with you or not?”
it was quiet for a few seconds as he processed the made-up scenario causing huge commotion in the internet.
until his thick busan satoori echoed in the room. “ey, no. of course not!” you turned into a fit of giggles, looking up to see his reaction. his eyes were furrowed and his lips formed a frown. chest puffed up and doe eyes extra big. he looked aghast almost. as if it was ridiculous to ask such an obvious question with an obvious answer. just by the look on his face, you could already see the stream of thoughts swimming around his brain.
ah, yes, this is jungkook we’re talking about. of course not!
“i’m your boyfriend. not them. you should only be taking care of me like that. do you even know how giddy i was when you peeled perilla leaf for me the first time? and when you peeled shrimp for me even though you don’t like seafood because of the smell?” he rambled on frustratedly, eyes getting wider and wider as he explained to you his reasons. he slightly stuttered because of his lisp, which you always find so endearing that it makes your heart ache.
you chuckled lightheartedly after hearing his years old confessions, the happiest grin plastered on your face. “oh, my baby. that made you happy?” you sat up and turned to face him, hands wrapping around his forearm to tug him closer to you.
you held his face in your hands and gave him honey kisses all over as he spoke with his eyelids fluttered shut, savoring the affection he was being showered with while still adamant on getting his point across.
“of course it did. it feels intimate to me. just like the first time we shared a straw. those are all the same to me! they led to us being in a longterm relationship, see?”
“peeling perilla leaves is the same as sharing a straw?” you tilted your head in curiosity, waiting for him to answer.
a pout formed on his lips, jungkook feeling disappointed with your question. “when you peel perilla leaves, you use your chopsticks, don’t you?”
“oooh right. i see it now.” you made a sound of realization, the puzzle pieces coming together in your head.
“what about you? is it okay if i do it for your friend?” he raised an eyebrow quizically, arms encircling your waist to make you sit on his lap.
you blinked at him, shaking your head slowly. “they’re an adult. either separate them on your own or just not eat perilla leaf at all.”
his expression softened at your answer. “hah, that’s true. you got a point there.” he nodded his head repeatedly in agreement, eyes darting to the televison. it was quiet for a minute with you putting your focus back on your respective screens. until he looked at you again like a kicked puppy. “i’m an adult too. but you’d still do it for me, right?”
you looked up from your phone and smiled at him, pinching his soft cheek. “of course, that’s what lovers are for.”
which brings you back to the present day.
“they peel off one perilla leaf. next thing you know, they’re holding hands. and fall in love! and they end up getting married!”
the plot jungkook laid out to his friends sounds awfully similar to the summary of your love story in his head. oh lord, of course, it’s not okay for him.
you’re almost crying from laughter, body vibrating against his hold. his shirtless body is radiating natural warmth, so you kick off the thick blanket to let yourself breathe. “another thing that’s funny? namjoon said at the start that he didn’t care at all but he started to get angry by the end and agreed with you.”
“tch, see? i even got our leader to agree with me. i totally made sense.” he says cheekily, clicking his tongue proudly.
“you were so cute being all sulky though!”
“stooop. i’ve had enough teasing about it.” he pouts, resting his forehead on your cheek as he secretly takes a peek at the screen. voices talking over each other and laughter in the background escape from the phone’s speaker.
he saw himself bowing down with a marker in hand, and he remembers that he was randomly doodling again as the heated discussion took place. his head was somewhere else, though. he was thinking about you.
his thumb brushes against the skin of your hip as he feels the rhythmic rise of your stomach. a thought crosses his mind like an arrow released by careless hands. i’m thankful for this life.
“i’m not teasing you, baby. i’m just adoring you. the best boyfriend.” you coo, fingers softly brushing the row of earrings on his ear. he shivers at the touch. “mhmm, your piercings look so cool.”
“should i get more? i want to.” the praise instantly makes him perk up.
“more? i’ll start to feel bad for your ears.”
“not my ears. somewhere new.” he chuckles, adjusting his position to lay his head on your chest. he can feel your heartbeat against his cheek, and somehow, it also makes him aware of his own. while there is the mind numbing adrenaline of performing on stage that makes him feel alive, there is also the tranquility of being alone with you that makes him hyperaware of his body — from the guts in his stomach all the way to the tips of his fingers. both can be overwhelming, but welcomed with open arms. and embraced tightly with the eternal refusal of letting go.
“somewhere new likeeee?”
he rolls down to lay on his back again, pointing at his toned abdomen. “belly piercing?”
you look at his abs. and then his face. and then his abs again. god? this isn’t the guy i was calling cute just a minute ago.
“do you want me to go insane?”
taglist! @lolalee24 @alanniys @jjkeverlast @queenofdragonsandcats @i9hyuck @yvesismywife @enhypenslay @cramseys @witchfqllen @virgogentlejk @yoonqki @jeonwiixard @monilyv @bermudaisy @ameliejeannelaurent + send an ask / dm if you want to be added (or removed) :D
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aamalaaa · 2 days ago
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River🍃🏞️
Idol Namjoon! x reader
genre: fluff on top of fluff
warnings: bike accident, Joonie is a bit sad at first but it’s very short :((
a/n: this is just a very sweet little drabble I hope you like it!
// this is a part of a short drabble series I’m working on and it’s loosely connected to The Party And The Broom (I’ll link it at the end) but you can read it as a stand-alone.
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The moment Namjoon had met Jungkook’s new girlfriend at the Jack In The Box pre-release party and had seen how enamoured with each other they were, it’s like something clicked within him. It’s like he realized at that moment he didn’t have to be alone.
He could want to fall in love again. It wasn’t selfish or egoistical, he deserved to find someone, to be happy and share that happiness with another person.
And so with that mindset, he went on a few dates, never finding exactly what his heart was longing for. It’s not that they weren’t good enough or kind enough. They just didn’t stir something in him, he never felt the urge to kiss them after walking them home or contact them again for a second date. He began to feel unmoored and disenchanted.
Like maybe, he just wasn’t meant to find THAT someone.
And so he did what never failed to bring him comfort, he went biking along the Han River. Watched in awe how the wind blew through the green summer leaves, wondered if there was a melody to it that the human ear could not catch.
He basked in the warm breeze, watching people go by, children laughing, couples holding hands.
That’s when he saw you.
You were like a magnet and he found himself caught in your magnetic field, under your spell. Soft gusts of wind kept blowing strands of hair in your face, blurring your vision.
And that’s how you fell off your bike, hands right in front of you to try and soften the fall.
He gasped and started biking faster to get to you, heart skipping a beat.
When he got to you, you were still down, probably a bit shocked at the sudden accident. He got off his bike in a hurry, it fell to the side but he couldn’t bring himself to care at this moment. He kneeled down next to you.
“Are you hurt, how do you feel?!” He asked, voice laced with concern. You turned your head towards the deep voice, cheeks cherry red.
“Y-yeah.. I think so..?” Your voice came out a bit shaky.
You were very much embarrassed, that he could tell. He felt an urge to help you, tuck the strands of hair that had fallen in front of your eyes behind you ears.
Instead of doing something that embarrassing and inappropriate, he simply extended his arm towards you, palm up.
You eyed him, gaze a bit wary before you accepted his offer and took his hand. You yelped in discomfort when he squeezed your hand to help you up, your palm was bruised and cut.
“You are hurt” You stared into his eyes and your own seemed to widen, like you’d recognized someone you knew. Except, if Namjoon already met you, he’s positive he would’ve remembered.
How could someone ever forget meeting you? You had the most beautiful presence he had ever been lucky enough to witness. He would be the stupidest man known to existence to not at least try and get to know you.
“It would.. seem so yeah” you whispered, like you both were in a tiny space where there only existed you and him, afraid that if you spoke just a little too loud, the moment would end, shatter into a million pieces, like glass, all around you.
Namjoon was enthralled by you. He felt possessed by your being and those sharp eyes. They seemed to hide secrets and dreams that would probably never be uttered. He never believed in love at first sight, never will.
What he believed in was two souls meeting and immediately feeling comforted by each other, drawn to each other. That’s what he felt with you, he was certain. Your hand was still in his.
“I can help, I have a first aid kit in my backpack, can I..?” His voice was deep and just shy of a whisper.
You nodded and he smiled, beautiful dimples on display. His presence felt like a warm hug from a dear friend, you felt fuzzy and safe, it was strange. In a good way, a comforting way.
You both settled on the grass a few feet away from where you had fallen, he tended to your wounds. You blushed, he laughed and comforted you. You both got to talking about life, your wildest dreams, family, the meaning of words.
Before you knew it, sunset came, bringing you back to reality. What was reality? It wasn’t the reality he had known barely a few hours ago, he felt hopeful and reinvigorated now. Funny how one meeting can change so many things.
“Will I see you again?” He questioned shyly, picking at the grass. You smiled coyly and your cheeks heated. You were adorable he thought, for the hundredth time today.
“Same place, same day next week?” You looked at him, eyes hopeful and a little embarrassed maybe. He took your hand and rubbed his thumb on the back of it, your skin was so soft and he, was simply human. How could he resist?
“Can’t wait” He replied, gaze locked into yours, unwavering. And he meant it, god he meant it.
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kookieswan · 19 hours ago
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Red Light (Snippet) - Ruby Reds
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Nightmare!Hoseok x Psychologist!Reader
Word Count: 800+
Genre: Horror AU, Monster AU, Psychological horror, Fluffy…?
Warnings: Very light sexual talk. It should be noted that this story will contain themes of horror/psychological horror and also explore obsessive behaviors and codependency. Many characters are morally gray. Please be warned!
Summary: Hoseok never thought that pudding would be magical, and yet…
Notes: Another cute little something featuring more of our favorite Nightmares! A direct sequel to ‘Pudding’ although it takes place almost at the exact same times
This is a snippet from the Red Light series. Find the Masterlist here ♥️
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“To what do we owe the pleasure Jeon?” Hoseok cracks an eye open as Jungkook comes tumbling through the large door, two bowls balanced in his hand just barely. He kicks the door shut behind him quickly, walking toward Hoseok’s cell with a loud sigh. The winged man watches him lazily, slowly standing from his bed as Jungkook approaches the cell.
“It’s been requested that I bring you your food from now on by Dr. _____. Apparently you’ll be served every other day instead of whenever they fucking decide to. It’s fine with me, I get to see- um… Never mind.” Namjoon finally shuffles around in his cell, signaling that he’s actually alive. The older Nightmare decided to ignore Jungkook’s crush and glances over as the other man moves toward his own cells opening, patiently waiting for his food. Namjoon remains quiet, eyes staring off blankly into space.
“… I see. What is it today? Dog food?” It was kind of his dear doctor to try and change things up for them, but still… She’s constantly putting her safety on the line and Hoseok doesn’t like it. Not one fucking bit. Jungkook shakes his head with a grin, setting the smaller bowl down finally.
“Far from it. It’s pudding, plain chocolate. Kind of an odd fucking choice if you ask me but.” The guard shrugs, pushing the food through the small opening in Hoseok’s cell. There’s a quick flash of red from the corner of his eye, but he ignores it; probably a fluke.
Hoseok grabs his bowl and makes his way back to his bed as Jungkook takes the other noticeably larger one to Namjoon, casually pushing it through the opening before the nightmare practically tears it from his hands. He shovels a spoonful into his mouth quickly, all while Hoseok and a Jungkook watch him with raised brows. The unhinged sound that leaves him not a moment later has Jungkook backing up with his hands raised.
“I could kiss you right now Jungkook. Tongue and all.” The guards eyes widen comically, going as round as saucers. Hoseok thinks he could compare them to Bambi’s if he wanted to, and he prays Yoongi doesn’t find out. The older man slowly spoons a little of the food into his own mouth, appreciating the rich flavor of the dessert. It’s so good that he swears it can’t be box made…
“And that’s my cue to fucking skedaddle. Goodbye.” Hoseok snorts with his mouth full as the guard practically sprints out of the room, barely remembering to lock the main door as he departs. Namjoon actually skips back to his bed, facing toward Hoseok as he plops down in a heap and continues to practically inhale his food.
“It’s so good, fuck…” Hoseok watches in thinly veiled shock as Namjoons eyes steadily shift from the usual deep brown and glow a bright red, something he hasn’t seen in a long while. The younger Nightmare tilts his head back and moans loudly, the sound slightly gurgled by the thick pudding. The winged Nightmare can’t decided if he’s missed this version of Namjoon or not, but he’s leaning slightly toward no.
“Your Doctor; I, we, owe her. If anyone tries anything, I’ll try my best to keep her out of harms way. I did tell her I’m a good boy after all, I’ll do anything for this pudding.” After finishing his bite, he regards Hoseok with such intensity, it’s almost an uneasy feeling. The winged man nods, agreeing that all the Nightmares owe her at least a small amount. She’s really trying to make things better, even if it makes her a huge target. His precious silly doctor.
Hoseok sighs and concentrates for a moment, eye cast toward the ceiling. He listens closely, although it’s a little hard since Namjoon can’t seem to quiet down. He’s happy, at least he seems to be, so Hoseok doesn’t mention it. He doesn’t ruin this moment for him, not until he gets the answer he was looking for.
“Seokjin seems to think so too from what I can tell.” This makes Namjoon pause, the spoon halfway up to his mouth. He blinks at Hoseok with his ruby red eyes, an innocence there that correlates to the rest of his face when he starts to pout. The pudding plops back into the bowl with a thud, Namjoon slowly touching his reddening cheeks.
“My Jinnie… I miss him. Wanna see him again, wanna feel him…” Namjoon sighs dreamily, falling back against the wall next to his bed. He looks completely lovestruck, eyes now sparkling like a pink gemstone, the air in the room feeling slightly warmer. In extension, Hoseok can feel himself calming, a relaxation he’s missed terribly taking over his being. Hoseok decides then and there he likes this version of Namjoon much more.
“He’ll be with you soon Joon. Don’t you worry.”
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kooksbunnnn · a month ago
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Lost Cause- Jungkook
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Summary: Jungkook comes back to you after his 10 day trip to Busan, and you sense something different about him. 
Word count: 5.1k, cheating au
Warning: cheating, mentions of sex and hand jobs, pregnancy, past trauma, panic attacks, lots of crying, and regret. ANGST.
Notes: this has been in my drafts since November 2021 and is a form of catharsis for my past trauma. Cheating on someone is wrong no matter what reason or person. This is just my opinion on how I would react now since giving another chance is kinda traumatic for me. No offense to people who try again, but it's just my opinion. I apologize if I hurt someone's sentiments through my words. Thank you for reading though hehe~ ily
Today's a special day, Jeon Jungkook, the love of your life was back from his 10-day trip to Busan, courtesy of the company he worked his ass off for. Also, you had an announcement to make. You were pregnant, finally pregnant. After so many tries. You got so happy when the results came but since Jungkook was on a trip, you decided to keep it a secret until he comes back.
Anxiety, excitement, happiness, and maybe fear. What if he does not want the baby right now, with the workload and extra hours? These emotions are giving you a feeling that you are not able to place in your head quite clearly, but as soon as the sound of keys rattling reaches your ears, a smile appears on your face and joy wins the race against every other feeling.
You run towards the gate and hide against the wall that was beside the door giving you a spot big enough to put up your wedding picture frame. As soon as the door opens you jump and whisper a 'boo', which was meant to be adorable but made him gasp and drop his luggage on the floor.
You pick up the phone that he dropped and chuckle, hugging him, you whisper in his ears, "I missed you, baby."
When he doesn't hug you back your body tenses a little bit but before you can pull back he pulls you towards him and buries his head in your neck inhaling your scent. "I missed you too." You listen to him repeat the statement like a mantra, leaning back a little you look into his eyes...
Was he crying?
Noticing his tense behavior, you kiss him, trying to reassure him of your presence. Inhaling his natural scent which was also mixed with a few cigarettes. You frown in the kiss when you realize something is off because of the way he just kept his lips frozen.
Also, the cigarettes were his symptom of stress but you don't pay too much attention to the smoky feeling and kiss him trying to make him relax. The way he was holding you tightly but also with hesitation, 3 years of a relationship along with 2 years of experience in marriage has taught you both to read each other's body language making you a bit worried.
You step back to look at him properly and see that he had dark circles under his eyes, hair disheveled as if been run through by his hand many times. He does it again, proving your theory.
He is not making eye contact.
The single drop of tear dropping on his chin tells you something is wrong, his chest heaving as if trying to contain and also let out something. You realize he hasn't even looked at you once.
"Kook?" Hearing your hushed tone, he opens his eyes to look at your face for a second and then look away.
"Are you okay? Is everything okay? Did something happen, baby?" Your questions in a whisper-like voice made him tear up and say a distant 'yeah just missed you so much.' You look at his face that was now focusing on the picture you hung on the wall from your honeymoon trip, the hills in the background of the picture making you smile at the memory of your husband whining like a baby because of the cold.
The picture even has his nose red and all scrunched up while you were posing with a big smile on your face, your chin resting on his shoulder with your hands in his jacket's pocket while you hugged him from the back, fitting into each other like puzzle pieces.
You both look at the picture and almost zone out, then you notice the open door facing the hallways and a light chuckle leaves your mouth, saying sorry for not even letting him in and jumping on him. He shakes his gaze off the painting and rushes to close the door before he takes his shoes off and just tumbles across the entrance.
"You know I ordered a big pizza meal but then canceled it cause I suddenly changed my mind. It amazes me that I can change my mind in 35 seconds.." you scoff at how fast you felt nausea set in your stomach when you ordered the pizza.
Still nervous about how you're gonna tell him everything, you keep on blabbering. "But then I decided to cook some steak which I couldn't, cause I suddenly had a headache, so I decided that you can suggest something and we can order while you showe-- where are you going kook?"
You say in a confused tone when you see him opening the balcony door letting the cool air inside.
"Just need some air, Y/N"
Flinching at how he takes your full name, you realize it must've been your rambling that sent him off to the balcony for air. You feel sorry and walk towards the porch where he just stands and stares at the skyline from above, the sun still setting on the horizon painting the sky a pretty shade of purple mixed with a crimson red.
"I'm sorry if I annoyed you baby, just excited that you are back. You wanna shower first or eat something? You seem tired." He shakes his head at your question rocking your body a bit with his since you have yours attached to his back like a koala.
"Can I get some time alone...please?" You pull back with your eyebrows knitted together at his sudden request that makes you feel something in your stomach making you want to puke. "Um, okay. Take your time.." you step back into the lobby hesitantly when suddenly the puking sensation becomes too real and you run towards the bathroom with a hand clutched over your mouth.
Rushing into the bathroom you fall onto your knees in front of the pot, pouring out almost everything you had this morning. Jungkook comes running after you kneeling down immediately beside you, holding your hair back which you were not doing a good job at.
He rubs your back as you cough and try to breathe at the same time not being able to pay attention to his 'are you okays' or 'hey what happened' or 'it is okay, it's okay I am here.'
When you feel like you have nothing left in you, you sit up a little to flush the remnants of your indigested food into the sewer, falling back against the wall connected to the shower cabinet. Breathing heavily, you try to calm down when you notice a big pair of doe eyes looking at you in concern, he tucks a strand of hair behind your ear as you try getting up.
"I am sorry, you didn't have to help, seriously. You're tired, go take a shower then we can eat something okay?" You speak hoarsely and try to leave the tensed guy's embrace but he stops you, looking at you from top to bottom examining you like a doctor while you turn to use some mouth wash.
"I didn't have to help? You were literally wrenching your gut out, are you even okay?!" He asks you in a terrified voice turning you towards him after you spit out the mouthwash. You, not wanting him to tell him the baby details in front of a toilet pot, lie, hold his face in both of your hands telling him that it was stale fried rice that you had in lunch. Whispering an 'oh', he immediately takes a step away from you and asks you to be careful, adding a little 'please' at the end making your heart swell with love.
You both stand there silent while the tap water runs in the background. Yo Turning it off after some seconds, you break the silence by telling him that he can take shower while you can go order something in the meanwhile.
Walking towards the door, you ask, "Chicken?" he looks at you for a second and whispers a tiny 'yeah'. You smile and lean in to kiss his cheeks telling him not to take too long cause you have to talk about something. "Me too," he says in an almost inaudible voice, giving him a little nod, you walk back into the kitchen.
After a long 32-minute shower, according to your phone clock, he comes out in a black t-shirt and grey jogger combination.  You smile smelling his body wash from 2 feet away and immediately feel comfort seeping into you. hugging him you inhale his natural and soapy scent, running your hand in his damp hair.
"There's my perfect and not so travel-worn husband." You smile at him trying to make eye contact when he suddenly buries his nose in your neck, sniffling and tightening his arms around you, mumbling very inaudible apologies.
You try to pull back to talk to him but he doesn't let you, his body starts shaking as he starts to sob. Your heart picked up its pace as you've never seen him like this and you feel a clench in your heart as if something bad is about to happen.
"Jungkook, hey, what's the matter? Are you okay?" You pull back putting a lot of strength and see how his face is red and his tears are just flowing out. "Hey look at me.." you try to make him face you but he just shuts his eyes trying to face away from your worried ones.
He suddenly sits down on the chair with a thud, slipping from your hold. He clutches his head and keeps on coughing and crying. You try to calm him down with big wide eyes filling with tears as well.
You hear him say things like, 'I fucked up, I fucked up. I am so fucking sorry.' and your heart sinks somewhere you dread it from falling into. You kneel in front of him, taking his hand in yours, pressing short kisses on his tattooed fist.
After insisting a lot you finally make him face you but the expression on his face makes you doubt the curiosity in your heart because you have a very bad feeling about this.
Siting up on your knees coming face to face with him, both of you sniffling, his eyes and his nose all red, lips quivering.
"I love you Jungkook, okay? trust me, tell me what happened, please?" You say softly and the guilt and disgust he felt towards himself made him wanna vomit. How he wanted to just go back in time, to revert the fuck up he did, he ruined everything, everything he built, everything he had in this relationship. The love, the trust, he could see everything breaking including you and your heart.
Not being able to keep his eyes on you, he looks down at his lap and you have a feeling you're not gonna like his next words. Tightening his hold on your hands he said,
I cheated on you.
The silence between you two, after hearing the words come out of his mouth, was deafening. You can't even hear your heartbeats, did it stop? was this a dream? A nightmare if precisely termed, if yes you want out of it. You feel the air in your lungs escaping and a panic setting inside you.
"It happened just once, I am sorry. I don't know why I did it. I am really sorry. I don't know what to do.." he keeps going on and on but nothing reaches you.
There is this ringing in your ear that doesn't seem to stop and after a good 1 or 2 minutes of looking blankly at the body shaking and sobbing in front of you, you realize that you went blank. then the realization hit and you felt all alone in the room with silence, slow breathing, panic, and the "feeling of a life growing inside you". Questions. A lot of questions, came running at you with knives and swords piercing through your heart.
The unfocused look in your eyes and the loosening grip of your hands made him jolt up in the chair and hold your hands tighter, pulling you towards his body, he left your hands and held you by your shoulders, trying to shake you out of the panic. He can almost read the questions in your eyes.
Why? Were you not enough?
Did he fall out of love?
What about the baby?
Did you do something wrong?
Did you gain weight?
What about the baby?
Were you boring?  
Did you cross any limitations on his privacy?
What about the baby?
Should you have worn more makeup?
Should you have gotten that surgery your aunt suggested?
Will he leave you?
Would you have to beg? Should you beg?
What about the baby?
Should you tell him?
What if he leaves?
What will happen to you and the baby?
He wants to explain and give you answers, but he needs you to get back to him for it. Back to the lobby where you were looking into his eyes but not looking at him. you were not with him.
"Y/N. Look at me. Hey, Y/N, focus baby. Talk to me please. Yell at me. Scream. Hit me. Just talk please." He shakes you and your body responds with a limp movement which makes him leave the chair and get down on the floor. The anxiety, the panic, the betrayal, all making your breathing ragged. You want to scream but your body doesn't respond.
You've been cheated a lot of times in your life, many times. Including the one time, a guy used you for a bet to prove to his friends that he can fuck the arrogant nerd. In high school, the bullies of your school had bets on who can smack your ass or grope you in the hallways or in the classroom, forcing you to transfer your school.
Making new friends in the past was never easy for you and since everyone behaved well to you first and then betrayed you, giving you trust issues. So whenever you got serious with a guy, the issues made the relationship difficult ending up with him dumping you or with the infamous cheating.
After 5 and a half years of isolation from friends and love. You finally found Jungkook who proved in every single way that he can be your friend and lover at the same time. That you both can be happy together. Without anyone else. And as of now, if not him, you have no one. This leaves you with another question.
Are you gonna end up lonely in that depressing, dark pit where you cried and cried isolating yourself, wanting to kill yourself, and almost doing it?
The thoughts hit you like a punch in the gut and the amount of shaking Jungkook had you get out of the daze and finally focus on him. Looking at his face you remember everything you guys have done. The kisses, the movies, the cuddles, the teasing, the late-night walks, the crying sessions, the fights, the sex..
Before you can even think about the following genres of your memories, you push him back and clutch your head. Falling forward with your knees still tucked under your thighs, you pull your hair to stop the pain in your head and let out a screech that makes Jungkook sob harder.
He doesn't wanna see you like this, your body shivering, and the way your hands are shaking and your loud cries and wails that he never wanted to be the reason for. He knew your past. He knew every fucking thing. How could he do this to you? He vowed that he will never make you cry, he literally would kill anyone who made you upset.
Now, what should he do with himself?
You gasp as you take in the air, your body falling back as you reach for something on the ground to get support from. Jungkook tries to reach out to you but you yell at him to stay away. You can't stop the pictures in your head of him kissing someone, moaning someone else's name.
"Why?" You ask between sobs, mostly talking to yourself, not actually wanting answers. seeing you like this he cries harder, crawling towards you, trying to hold your hand, you struggle against him, trying to push him again but he pleads in front of you to listen to him explain.
"No!" You scream and push him off. Making him fall back against the floor, and you even stop for a second to check on him if he is hurt.
"Was I not enough for you?! Why did you, out of all the people have to prove that I am not worth putting people's time into?! What am I supposed to do huh?" you kneel in front of his body that was hesitant to reach out but wanted to comfort your panicked state. "You tell me Kook...Do you expect me to forgive you? Or do you expect me to trust you again and just forget that this.." you move your pointer finger towards both of your chests, "..ever happened?"
Getting up you get a dizzy feeling in your head and you can feel the room spinning. You lean against the kitchen counter, tears still flowing. You look at him who was getting up to sit on the chair still looking down at the floor. Suddenly you can't breathe without asking him the questions in your mind, you wanted to know, Why? Who? Where?
"Who was she?" You ask not able to hide the little crack in your voice as you looked at your husband, who promised to love you. Forever.
"She was the manager in the club I went to celebrate with hyungs." He speaks up without hesitation knowing that he owes an explanation.
That easy? Was it that easy to forget about you and fuck another girl?
"What was her nam- actually no I don't wanna know..." you felt bile rise in your throat at the thought of knowing her name, so after a pause, you got the courage to ask him, "Did you fuck her?" He looked at you flinching at the choice of your words.
"No." He said looking away tears still flowing. Before you could ask further, he explained himself. "I didn't fuck her, Y/N. Does it matter what we did? I am really sorry Y/N, please look at me." He said as he stood up to walk up to you.
You chuckled sarcastically, no humor present in your voice. You looked up and saw guilt in his eyes as he stopped in his way when he heard you let out the half-hearted laugh. It hurts to see him cry but you can't help but feel the pain in your chest overlapping your love. You doubt if you should even tell him about his baby. It was supposed to be a surprise but clearly, your husband had better a surprise planned.
You really want to, but you can't really see a future ahead of you now.
"We. It's such an easy word right kook?" You look at the ground thinking about how he used the word so easily which was supposed to be only his and yours. "We. Us.." You look up at him and say through clenched teeth,
"Yes, It matters Jungkook tell me. What exactly happened? I want to know where exactly I went wrong for you to go seek help somewhere else."
He wanted to protest but you shush him with an adamant 'Tell.Me.Jungkook'.
He looks at his feet and you prepare yourself for the heartbreaking details. "We met-.." Wincing, he looks at you and changes his words "I met her when she came to ask if our group needed something. Namjoon Hyung introduced all of us since she was his old friend. They wanted to celebrate the deal and since she was hyung's friend, we invited her, and I-I don't know what happened but I got really drunk and I just went to wash my face but she j-just grabbed me and pushed me against the wall and.." he started sniffling and you felt your body shake and long, heavy breathes leaving your lungs, eyes squeezed shut, with clenched fists, trying to hear the whole story without breaking down. "She started kissing me and.."
He pauses pleading with you to not let him continue.
"Continue please.." he can hear your heart, your voice, and your demeanor breaking at the same time. "Y/N please.." hearing this, you look at him with eyes that were emotionless, telling him that he fucking owes this much to you.
All the while he was speaking, you were thinking about the baby, the little person who did nothing wrong. Will his or her father leave? You feel your breath slipping away at the thought but you control the urge to scream until he finishes.
"..and then we just gave each other a handjob.." you flinched at the term making your knuckles go white. He sounds so distant, so small, the guilt eating him up.
"Did you cum?" you ask him, eyes shut as if trying to avoid the answers. He sighs and mutters a 'yes'. You inhale sharply trying to gasp for air looking up at the ceiling, "did you make her cum?"
He feels the knot in his throat fighting the food he ate earlier which was trying to come out, guilt and disgust seeping into his veins. This sounds so disgusting and you sound so broken. Your panicked breathing makes him feel pathetic. But after gathering some courage he admits cause he had to answer you.
You don't know what comes over you when you call his name softly.
"..yes."
It was supposed to happen if they did that kind of stuff but it made you feel sick to the stomach. You feel the world spin and you wonder if there is a chance that a nightmare could feel so true.
"Jungkook?"
He looks up at you with blurry eyes and you reach up to his hand to hold it against your belly. He looks at you confused for a second but the moment you see him realize, you let his hand slip out of yours and his eyes sparkle for a second, he understands that finally he fulfilled his dream which was to be a father but loses it as soon as he realizes that he fucked up bad and what he did was irreversible, ruining three lives altogether.
He steps back as he realizes what he has done. Both of you have been trying for half a year and now, when he finally got the chance to be a father, to be a perfect husband, a chance to help you sit up, feed you, to do stuff for you cause you won't be able to do, since you would be having a big belly, with his baby inside, who will one day hold his hand and call him 'dad', he wanted to help you get through the labor so that he could hold the baby in his arms taking in his or her features while you sleep because you'd be exhausted, a family picture that he imagines being taken in the hospital to get it framed and put on the bedside wall.
Him.
You.
And the baby.
What has he done?
You both stay silent after the reveal, the only sound audible was of you sniffing after crying for a time none of you could measure. Your thoughts whirling inside your mind, tiring you, not realizing when you blacked out.
Jungkook heard how your hiccups stopped gradually, making him look upward to see how you passed out and had your head rested on the wall behind you. Your body cold and your face wet with tears. He carries you to your bedroom and tucks you in, feeling sick when he sees your face and nose red. Black trails on the cheekbones. He tries to rub the smudges off but pulls his hand back when he realizes that he lost his right to do all this.
He places a glass of water on the nightstand which was his daily habit, cause he knows you always wake up at midnight, searching for water with grabby hands almost falling over one time, so he started putting it there every night.
You were his princess whom he liked to spoil even after your complaints of being a spoiled brat because of him, always smiling when he called you his baby. He made sure you didn't have to leave the comfort of your bed. He remembers how you smiled looking at him with your big doe eyes filled with love which were now red because of him.
He turns off the lights of the room to make sure your eyes don't strain while you sleep, since he would not sleep next to you, to help you get your relief by burying your head in his chest to avoid the lights. He lost the privilege.
All these emotions made him feel nauseous but nothing comes up. The feeling sitting inside him as he watches your pale face being lit under the moonlight coming through the gap in the window curtains. He didn't realize how the clock turned from eight in the evening to 01:05, midnight.
He sat on the floor next to your hand, not even daring to touch you trying to think of ways to solve this,  he doesn't want to leave you alone, afraid of you getting up due to a nightmare or morning sickness.
He doesn't want you to be alone.
Not realizing when he fell asleep, but when he wakes up he doesn't find you anywhere in the room, not even in the bathroom. Calling out your name in panic, he runs out to the lobby where he doesn't find you either. He calls for you in taking out his phone to call people who might know where you were, but the cool air from the balcony caressing his face takes him towards you on the balcony.
He rushed towards you and saw how you were crouched down on the floor sipping coffee or tea. It might be tea coz you don't like coffee in the morning. 'It makes me talk bitter all day' you told him once. The memory making him smile.
After finishing the tea you keep the empty mug on the floor with a clink and without looking at him, focus still inside the empty vessel, you softly speak, "Kook, I don't know if I can see you, or feel the same way for you as I did before, b-but.. I think our child should be born with both the parents. Still together.." he looks up at you with hopeful eyes at the same moment you do but then you interrupt him with your statement,
Walking inside the balcony area, decorated by you as soon as you both moved into the apartment 8 months ago, with plants, wall hangings, colorful pots, and a set of chairs with a little round table for your balcony date nights you had on Saturdays.
Sitting down he sees that your eyes are still swollen and he observes you were crying before he woke up. He wants to caress your swollen skin but doesn't, so he just sits across from you on the balcony floor looking at the floor underneath him.
"That does not mean that I can forgive you. You lost the place you had in my heart, Jungkook. I am strong. But I am not that strong to let you back in my life or take a chance with you and give our relationship a try. After what happened to me in the past, this was my last straw and I hope you know that I have loved you with everything I had... I still do. But I just... can't."
You feel your heart clench at the way he opens his mouth to say something but closes it the moment you start tearing up. He looks at his lap again, soft sniffles coming from his direction.
You don't want to leave him alone but still, you get up to leave the balcony with Jungkook looking at the floor not able to make eye contact with you.
With your back towards him, you say, "I am going to live at my mom's house for some time until I find an apartment, I dont want to stay here.." looking around you feel your heart sinking as every spot that screams about the time you've spent here.
"...the memories will fucking kill me. I will shift somewhere else after I find the apartment, uh, you can..um, visit whenever you want, as I w-want you to be an equal part of the child's life as I am, just.." he looks up at you with teary eyes at your words, "..don't expect to be a part of my life kookie. It's not easy but I can't risk it. I have to take care of us"
Us. You and the baby. Not the three of you, this realization makes him look away with watery eyes.
Seeing him try to control his breathing you couldn't help but walk back into the balcony to kneel in front of him. Leaning forward, you put your hand on the other side of his face and give a peck on his cheek. He holds your wrist in place so you could not move, you both sniff simultaneously while inhaling the air as if breathing is the most difficult thing in the world.
You feel your heartbreak at the Irony. He used to be your safe space. He helped you breathe.
You put your forehead against his and let his scent get absorbed and engraved in your mind. One last time, your mind tells you. You know you have to be strong. You don't want to live with the anxiety and fear of him cheating on you again. Your past has ruined your trusting instincts and now jungkook just put the cherry on the top.
You mumble a little 'I love you before nudging his nose with yours as he tries to not let you go, but eventually does cause he didn't dare to stop you after doing you so much wrong. You get up to leave when you hear a silent 'I love you too'
You let the tears fall silently as you left the apartment, breaking down as soon as you reach your car. Gripping the steering wheel you see the shiny ring on your finger reflecting the rays coming through the windscreen, towards the plushie sitting on your dashboard he gave you on the first day of your job. The little squishy duck looking at you with pity in its plastic eyes, as it now has witnessed your most happy and the most dreadful ones in approximately 8 months.
Everything was over. You and Jungkook, your perfect fairytale, your perfect family, kids,  the dream you've been dreaming of forever. Just gone. 
Important Notice♡
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taegularities · a month ago
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stars behind waves | jjk (m)
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Summary: With a decade’s distance between Jungkook and you, your paths cross on the same island you deemed your second home years ago. And you realise once again – the ocean can never compare to the twinkle in his starry eyes.
➳ pairing: Jungkook x reader ➳ rating: 18+ ➳ genre: estranged best friends to lovers, vacation/beach!au; angst, fluff, smut ➳ warnings: so so much yearning and pining, gentle fuckboy jk cos i’ve no control over myself, a bit of jealousy, the first kiss, arguments/fighting, unresolved issues, heartbreak, angry confessions; explicit sexual content: making out, asking for permission, dom & big dick jk, handjob in the shower, oral (m. & f. receiving), some clit slapping, some biting, squirting, jk loves her tits... and her ass even more, fingering, protected sex, soft and rough sex, body worship !!, jk is SUCHHH a goner, he comes on her ass, aftercare, praises; so many emotions; lmk if i forgot smth! ➳ wc: 22.7k ➳ a/n: here we gooo !! @missgeniality​​ & @voiceswithoutlips​​ my angel betas, as usual, i’d be lost without you 😔  i’m really happy with how this one came out, so i hope you guys enjoy it as much as i did writing it !! as always, don’t forget to drop a message in my inbox – it makes my day <33
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➳ listen to the SBW playlist for the full experience 💙  
TAGLIST | MASTERLIST | WIPs 
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There is a long lost beach somewhere at the end of the world.
It belongs to a blooming, floating island, pleasant and hot. Wildlife chirps hidden behind trees, calm and welcoming. There are waterfalls that must be somewhere in the middle of the island – you’re not quite certain anymore, since your memory of the place has weakened over time.
You do remember the sun that descended there, though – you always used to say it wasn’t the same as the one you admired at home, watching from your garden.
Jungkook would always reprimand you, tut at you, throw tiny little shells at your bare thighs until you, furied and irritated, abandoned him at the beach. He would stay there until the moon rose from the east, and you would watch him from afar.
He never walked away before you came back and sat down with him again, brushing away your prior fight to resume your conversation as though nothing happened. Your parents tended to observe your constant banter and the quiet apologies that followed; they called you tender and strange kids, and you guess you couldn’t quite disagree.
But to your defence, you weren’t the only child uttering peculiar things.
Jungkook loved to indulge in a world that defied science and nature’s rules. He liked to bend and twist images in his head, paint them new and refine them as he pleased. The bubbly, doe-eyed boy would explain to you that stars became closer the more you neared the horizon.
He had this detailed opinion that the flicker shining above the ocean was nice and all, but that it couldn’t compare to the burning stars behind the sea. The sky is infinitely nearer the further you swim, he used to tell you, the idea firmly attached to his guileless heart.
And this heart – it was bigger than the universe, too big to fit into that small body.
Because he enjoyed your smile; made sure to keep it plastered to your face.
One time, he pointed to the horizon and told you that there’d come a summer when he’d be big, old and strong enough to wade through the waves. Arrive at the edge, the big Behind of the ocean, and that he would dive back to you and bring you a handful of stars.
You were eight back then.
It was one of the first summers your families spent together, on an island that was a lot quieter back then, with only a tiny society living and breathing there. It housed a few cottages you’d rent to enjoy the beach for a few weeks.
And for a long time, it truly was a long lost beach for you, at the very end of the world, because the drive from your home to the island’s nearest town took ages. Then, you would step onto a ship that would bring you to the island, and even though it took just an hour or two for you to get there, it felt like you’d travelled for days.
Like you were travelling to a foreign world.
It was its very own world.
Now, there is a teeny tiny airport at the back of the island. You’ve come to realise that this place is not the end of the world, but the end of your country. And it’s not a lost beach either, but one you’ve turned into a stranger yourself.
You’d spend seething hot days on cruises with your parents, dig holes in the sand with your cousins or build castles with Jungkook. Stroll along the shore, throw each other into the water, grow up together and fall in love slowly, but surely.
That place… you don’t recognise it anymore.
You’re not even sure how you landed here. Maybe for the sake of nostalgia, weak to saudade. You’ve journeyed most of the world – or at least seen the places written all over your little travel diary.
That you’d ever go full circle and come back here, to watch the other sun go down and to let the new colours of dusk flatter your sight – you didn’t really expect it.
The ice in your cocktail has already melted. You don’t mind, though. You’re too busy looking around the resort that the island has become, hearing conversations between tourists that you sometimes understand and sometimes don’t.
Your cousin Seokjin, his fiancée and said fiancée’s best friend dragged your workaholic ass to vacation almost forcefully. The only demand you had in return was that you wanted to be able to decide where to go.
Seokjin has always been a fan of this place – just as long as you. So to say he was over the moon might be an understatement. But your beloved cousin was also the first person in your circle who blacked out before anyone else.
The first thing he did was empty his stomach of everything he ate on the plane. His fiancée Chae is currently “quarantining” with him in their hotel room, rubbing her darling’s back as though he has suffered a hospital-ripe illness.
In truth, Seokjin just doesn’t know which meals and drinks to mix. And he’s scared of flying. And he can’t handle eating in a moving vehicle.
He’s not truly sick – he’s just an idiot.
Chae’s friend Seoyeon, who you’ve met plenty of times and who excused herself to the bathroom, comes back with newfound energy and unwavering elegance. She puffs out a breath as she takes a seat on the bar stool next to you, praising, “The bathrooms are impeccably clean here.”
“They better be,” you respond, tapping your glass, “we paid a shit ton for this vacation.”
“I’m gonna be working my whole life to not feel guilty anymore.”
“This life and probably the next one, too.”
She smiles, her eyes scanning the bustling place and squinting when she stares into the bright lights, and you follow her gaze slowly. Somewhere in the distance, you hear waves crashing and the ocean’s silent songs. Despite the inebriation hanging in the air, you feel sober and at peace – fortunately not regretting that you were practically forced out of work to be here.
“Have you tried my cocktail?” you ask, pushing the glass towards her.
She shakes her head enthusiastically, manicured nails gripping the drink carefully before she brings it to her mouth. But once a single sip slips through the seam of her lips, she grimaces, handing it back to you with a disgusted, “It’s super warm.”
You reckon it probably tastes like flavoured piss now. But her expression is worth diamonds.
She takes a deep breath and throws her head back, her coloured platinum blonde hair falling over her toned shoulders. Seoyeon has a standard pretty face one usually sees in magazines and on billboards. She sports an hourglass figure, flaunts her gym membership; a beautiful smile with rosy lips always stares back at you.
And she’s incredibly kind, too.
You don’t know her that much. She’s the type of friend you don’t really miss when you don’t talk for weeks or months on end. You don’t think about her by your own will that much, but you must admit that she’s a delight to hang out with.
That is, until she excuses herself to explore the crowd gathered around here, and you use the perfect moment to draw back and check on your cousin.
On the way to your hotel, you spot a pathway leading to the forest that you seem to recognise. Even the tree looks somewhat familiar to you – and when you step closer, you realise why. It has your name eternalised on it – you think Jungkook did it back when you suggested carving your existence on this island.
You must’ve been around fifteen back then. You don’t remember much of the summer anymore – in truth, most of the years often blend into one, and it becomes hard to distinguish them from each other. Most of the time, you hold onto the hairstyles you carried or the clothes you liked to wear…
Seokjin and Chae are playing a game of Uno when you knock at their door; they look happy and healthy, keen on staying in for the first night, since your schedule is so tightly packed for the next days anyways.
For thirty or forty minutes, you join a few rounds and lose almost all of them. You rage at your brother figure that people with the name Kim Seokjin should not participate in competitive games anymore, starting from today and into eternity.
You leave their room with a grin on your face and a lit heart; though the feeling of ecstasy fades a little to give way to surprise. Seoyeon’s room is right next to yours; and as you pass by, you hear obscenely loud and lewd sounds echo out of it. In all honesty, she and her fling might destroy the hotel bed tonight.
In your slight tipsiness, you roll your eyes, wish her a good railing and walk on. But you can keep up the ignorance for only so long – because when you can’t seem to fall asleep an hour or two later either, you come to an angry stand.
What’s enough is enough, and if the animalistic couple on the other side of the wall won’t calm down, you’ll go and scold the noise out of them.
You knock firmly and with furrowed eyebrows, and the sounds halt for a moment. Then, a minute later, the door opens to a crack. Scruffy hair and foggy eyes stare at you, and when she recognises you, she pulls the door back, clothed in nothing but a white sheet around her body.
“Are you fucking okay?” you question, a hand on the door frame, clutching it tight.
“What?” she wonders, eyes wide, but then her expressions relax as she adds, “I’m fucking gloriously, thank you!”
“Seoyeon,” you warn, your eyes tired, your body sinking in fatigue. The flight was barely two hours long, but the previous night was short, and you’ve been on your feet since the early morning. “You’re gonna wake up everyone in this hotel.”
And perhaps that’s when the realisation kicks in. You see slight embarrassment in her face, albeit not as strong as her desire to knock the door close and return to The Glorious Fucking.
“I’m sorry,” she mumbles, brushing her hair back, “I’m just…”
“Yeah,” you interrupt; horny – she’s horny. You know. “It’s fine. Just—”
You close an invisible zipper over your mouth, and she laughs, chiming your name before she rubs your arm with her filthy hands. You’re close to trudging away again, hoping to get at least a few hours in before you embark on your first trip tomorrow.
But the world has cruel ways to turn harmless nights into unexpected wonders.
Before you came here and swallowed the fact that you were going to see your island again, there were thoughts your consciousness kept pushing away.
Thoughts of when you were a teenager, in love and fought the sting of separation from someone who you’d grown close to. Of when you wouldn’t even unpack before walking the beach with him, like it was a ritual you’d gotten used to. Of the last evenings when you had to leave the magic of the place behind again and go back to the mortal world.
You suppressed them vehemently.
Only for them to crash back now, at an intensity that throws you off your feet and into the centre of the earth.
Maybe he heard your voice… or the utterance of your name. Maybe he knew to step out just now – because when you meet Jeon Jungkook’s gaze after more than half a decade, he doesn’t freeze the way you do.
His eyes and mouth are agape, his lower half covered in sheets as well. He’s taking small steps towards you, the way he did when he saw you after months of busy school days again when you were kids.
You still recognise all the moles you used to count. The pout of his lips and the dark hair, longer now. His strong arms, tattooed today; the same slow blinks of his eyelids as when he listened attentively.
The same glimmer in his dark, gorgeous onyxes.
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In hindsight, you could’ve handled the situation better.
You never thought of the day you’d meet again – and if you did, you can’t remember anymore. You didn’t have a speech prepared, or awaited tears that might have flowed. There was no embrace you were waiting for; least of all in a situation like this.
“I’ll be there in a second.” Seoyeon stood in front of you like a Greek goddess, winked at him, then turned to you and whispered, “You see why I was being loud?”
Jungkook and you were both baffled, to say the least, because you could barely remember the last interaction you shared with him. On this very island, the last days you spent together; and back in your town, you lost touch very quickly.
And now he’s here, visiting the same beach as you, as an adult and not the kid you remember. With his hair tickling and covering the nape of his neck, his face sharper, his eyes still carrying the same spark you knew from back then and… and…
”Hey…” he breathed.
You toss in your bed, half screeching under your blanket, your cheeks warm. You feel a hint of panic, still embarrassed that you didn’t know how to react. This brings back a lot. His hushed hey, the lack of his usual smile, replaced by nostalgic melancholy that you can’t make sense of.
“Fuck,” you whine into the air of your room, utterly confused. “Shouldn’t have fled.”
But seeing him half naked in your friend’s room, knowing they were fucking for hours – what else could you have done? Said hi back? With the thought that you were interrupting an intimate moment between your friend and your ex-best-friend?
This is strange. So deeply strange. God.
Are you dreaming? Is this island actually magical, fabricating something new and changing reality? Has something infected your mind and now you’re hallucinating everything, from the bar and the cocktails to the hotel and its hallways?
Because can it be… that he’s really here?
He… Jeon Jungkook. Here.
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Tonight, you dream of a memory.
For the first night in years, his face graces your unconsciousness, different, considering the time and place. Back when you and Jungkook were barely twelve, and discovered tide pools and small starfish at a far end of the beach.
Astonishment was a word too underrated, because your mouths wouldn’t close. The tide pool wasn’t too large, but it was clear, blue, waves of the ocean crashing against rocks.
It looked picturesque, if any word was fitting enough; out of a travel brochure. Perhaps not as beautiful as waterfalls, but tranquil and comforting nevertheless. You wondered how none of the residents here had told you about it before.
Both of you sported shorts or dresses that day – in hindsight, however, you should’ve worn something warmer. But you both left your places with the intention to hike through the forest, prioritising mobility over a swimming trip today.
But now this… you couldn’t possibly miss out on it. So you floated on the water just like that, uncaring of how wet your clothes and how cold your bodies got; unaware of the scolding you’d receive later.
They’re fleeting, both the memory and the dream.
Eyes closed, your body in a slumber, you see the water moving quietly and softly, except where the sea sways. You hear the seagulls up above, peaceful and somewhat adorable – much like in a fairytale.
You feel the chill of the liquid that soon turns pleasant, and you accidentally swallow the salty taste of the ocean. And the hand tugging at your arm appears painfully real, pulling you here and there to show you this and that.
When you wandered back to the cottages that evening, your parents were grilling. They always trusted you. You knew your way around; you’d been here often enough.
But the moment they saw you, their eyes blew wide. Furious and disappointed, they reprimanded the both of you with wiggling fingers and disappointment in their voices; promised to keep you under surveillance for the next few days until you knew they’d calm down again.
Irritation accompanying their words, they forced you to shower and get into comfortable, dry clothes, looking at you in worry and telling you again to be freaking careful.
Tide pools far away sounded dangerous in their minds – but in truth, they hadn’t seen the serene beauty with their own eyes, and wouldn’t for a year or two to come. Until then, it remained a private, magical get-away for Jungkook and you.
Later that night, after dinner, he came to where you sat under a tree, writing into your diary and painting an amateur picture of the place, the starfish and the rocks. You closed the notebook when he fell in front of you, holding something in his hands, and said, “Look.”
Your big, curious eyes squinted, and you had no clue what he meant as you asked, “What’s that?”
“For you,” he said and opened his palms.
There was a small leaf on his hands, embracing a tiny object. He unwrapped the leaf – and suddenly, a pearl shone into your face. Indescribably gorgeous, the way you saw in The Little Mermaid and other famous – animated or not – beach and deep sea stories.
As a kid, you didn’t think those fantastical luxuries existed in the real world. So when the object on his feeble, young hands proved you wrong, you exclaimed, “Woah… where…?”
“At the tide pool today,” he explained, so eternally proud and thrilled, “I put it out of the clam, because clams are overrated. It looks cooler on a leaf.”
You thought clams were really cool; but still, you smiled, overjoyed and impressed, and teased, “You’re so weird, Jungkook.”
The grin he threw back at you was incomparable, one of a kind – wide and bright. 
You still hold the night in the forefront of your memory – it was a thoroughly precious one.
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The day after, you see him at breakfast.
You didn’t know he was staying at the same hotel; in truth, you didn’t know anything at all. And now that it’s light, you get a better peek at him, realising that he’s really here and not a figment of your imagination.
Most of the time, you keep staring past each other, up to the point that you start believing he can’t see you at all. On your end, you feel awkward; not hostile, but not the biggest fan of the situation either. You lick your lips, your fork digging through your breakfast.
You’re distracted and tired, and yet again, did not sleep well at all. Now that you think about it, though, the lewd noises stopped soon after you’d knocked at Seoyeon’s door.
As you detect from afar, Jungkook is here with a group of friends you don’t know.
Three men.
One of them has already scarfed down his breakfast and is peeling one tangerine after another, eating them like his life depends on them. Another looks like he jumped out of a fashion magazine – you think he belongs on a runway, not on an island.
The last one and Jungkook have half their backs turned towards you, but never really glance in your direction. Despite the fact that you haven’t met in what feels like a lifetime, he doesn’t seem very interested.
Or perhaps, he’s dodging your gaze, too.
But you attempt your best to rid your mind of his face. Of last night and the look he shot at you.
Instead, you embark on a journey – there is a guided tour nearby, and it contains wandering up a hill, eating at a small cosy tavern and proceeding to approach cliffs that tower above the sparkling sea. Your tour guide said you’d have the opportunity to cliff dive, and you, missing the thrill of it, are one of the first to climb up.
The day goes smoothly and is almost devoid of Jeon-Jungkook-thoughts and Jeon Jungkook himself. But then…
As you near the edge of the cliff, you realise that no one’s really here. Blending out the muffled noise from below, you stand tall above everyone else, waiting for something, enjoying the brisk breeze.
Until you hear someone say, “You still enjoy cliff diving?”
You flinch a little, gasping, and he stretches out a careful arm reflexively. Your eyes follow the tattoos all over his right arm, up to his shoulder and then look straight into his face. His hair is pushed back and wet from swimming, water falling off it in droplets.
Most, if not all, of the ink is new.
His body looks strong; muscles flexing, shoulders broad, abs firm… not so new, but enhanced. The last time you met, he was already lifting weights and well built. It was when your hormones raged harder than ever before; they added something to the affection you already felt for him.
Judging by the way you looked at him back then, you thought he knew.
“Yeah,” you confirm. You clear your throat, make your voice a little more powerful. “Haven’t  done it in a while, so the jump seems a bit scary.”
“Right? Same here.”
You look at his side profile and drop your shoulders, lingering on the transparent drops on his golden clavicles and neck for a second before you tell him, “I mean, I used to travel a lot before I started drowning in work. Just not to beaches that much.”
“What brought you here then?” Jungkook inquires, raising his hand to his ear to tuck his hair back. His bicep stiffens at his action, mountainous.
“The urge to relive a summer as I used to know it?” you tell him, and he gives you a timid smile, a hint of sombre yearning in his eyes. “What about you?”
He nibbles his lips for a second, and you stare at the black dot underneath before he says, “Something similar. Namjoon… one of the friends who’s here with me, he suggested this place, ‘cause he’s been here before. And… dunno, I said yes, because for some reason I knew I’d see a familiar face again.”
He laughs, and you join, blinking when he snaps his fingers and adds, “Just like that. It was like intuition.”
“You used to say that.”
So sudden… unexpected, but also not.
Jungkook hums at your words, and you silence immediately; that your past would creep up on you so fast isn’t something you intended to happen. But then again, you guess it would’ve happened at some point anyway.
The world and a human life are made of the past and memories, after all.
You press your lips into a thin line, and he answers, “Yeah. I talked about destiny and stuff a lot.”
His tone is relaxed and calm, demolishing the awkwardness levitating between you. And going with the serenity in his voice, you reminisce, “You always said you felt it when I was sad or upset.”
“And it was true.”
Wider smiles form on your faces; the strange shifting from one leg to another morphs into a straight stance and a more comfortable atmosphere. It happens faster than you expected – then again, comfort always settled fast with him.
There was a time when you wouldn’t mince a single word, because you knew you could babble about anything and everything.
“Isn’t it crazy how they’ve monetised this island? I mean, even worse than before,” you mumble, keeping your hair out of your face. “Back then, there were a few residents. A tiny market. You could get most necessities, but that was it. It’s like Malta now.”
Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing – you’ve seen a small number of islands since you started travelling around. It’s just that this place… your place… it feels different now.
“Right? Years ago, this felt like my own little paradise,” he answers, his eyes tracing the invisible line the flying seagulls and birds leave behind. “The places I used to explore and climb are closed now. It’s pretty sad.”
Your focus remains on the birds far away until your sight blurs, unblinking and lost in thoughts and his soothing voice. Never in a lifetime did you imagine you’d be standing here, conversing about such a topic, with no one less than him. You thought you had put his existence behind.
The universe shook some dice in its hands and calculated the odds of you meeting again; you’re sure they were narrowly slim, but you’re living in that alternate multiverse now.
Your unmoving stance only breaks when people pass by you, finally discovering the cliffs, too. Jungkook and you watch as they jump into the air, curl into a ball or stretch their hands over their heads, diving into the chill of the water.
He watches until the splash happens, and then asks, “Are you gonna jump or not?”
“Yeah, of course. I will,” you answer, taking a deep breath.
You step closer to the edge and look down, watch the people as they swim aside. The water is clear and blue, transparent enough to detect some fish and other sea life. The ocean stretches endlessly.
Jungkook clears his throat, shuffles his feet across the warm ground and suggests, “Wanna hold my hand for reassurance?”
“No,” you laugh, shaking your head lightly. It’s what you used to do as kids. “I’m okay… but thank you.”
And with that, you take a run-up, gathering every ounce of courage you can possibly muster. You suck in a deep breath, empty your thoughts and jump off the cliff in one go. The adrenaline kicks in within a nanosecond, and you close your eyes, your heart and gut dropping.
For a small moment that you float in the air, you wonder if Jungkook is following, or if he’s watching – what he might be thinking. And then—
Splash.
You sink and sink, feeling as though you might touch the ground any moment now. But instead, you straighten your body and hold your breath, stretching your arms before you begin to push the water down; swimming upwards.
Underneath the surface, the world is quiet. The noise isn’t even muffled – it’s non-existent. Just for now, you forget that the crowd at the beach exists. Forget that you’re not alone with him, on your very own island. It’ll always be yours, no matter how many bars and hotels they plant here.
You break the barrier separating waterlife and your own species with a sharp gasp. You take in the crisp air, floating with the waves, and brush your hair back. Open your eyes and look to and fro until another body appears a few metres from you.
Jungkook didn’t jump too far from you, and in a sense, he’s right next to you. Upon seeing you, he flashes a thumbs-up, squinting one eye shut and smiling at you with infinite joy.
Pushing his hair back seems a reflex he’s taught himself – and the sight is breathtaking. Bare, strong shoulders peek out of the water. He mesmerises you with harmless swimming motions, his bicep hard.
And when he’s crawled close enough to you, his chest grazes your arm underwater for a moment – probably unintentionally, but it paints your skin in goosebumps nevertheless.
Sidestroking to the shore, you set another goal in your mind. Higher this time – more of the adrenaline rush.
Your laughter never dies as your wobbly bodies come out of the water, dripping, your swimwear heavy. The sun warms your skin pleasantly as you walk up to the cliffs slowly, next to each other, still sighing from the thrilling feeling.
There’s not much of a conversation going on between you. It could be awkward, but instead, you feel tranquil. The bustle around you fills the silence anyway.
And then, he nudges your elbow once, and you look at him, hearing him say, “How have you been?”
After the last five to ten minutes, you didn’t expect such a mundane small-talk-question. But you jump aboard, telling him, “I’ve been okay. The last few years of college were rough. But hey, now we’re here, with a steady job which I took some days off from. What about you?”
“I’m well. Opened a bookstore.”
Your mouth forms a surprised Oh, and you nod in admiration, your beam genuine when you remember, “You always told me you wanted to. Always liked to read, didn’t you?”
“Yeah! Yeah, it’s nice,” he says. Somewhere in his chest, a spot heats up – it’s sweet that you still know. “I’m also majoring in something on the side. Started late, took my time… but I’m almost done.”
“There's individual time and pace for everyone… you did well. Congratulations, seriously. On the bookstore and the major.���
Jungkook’s demeanour turns shy, and he lowers his head, looking to the ground. A hand rubs the back of his neck and he thanks you timidly and quietly. He still has some traits of his younger self.
“Hey,” you then call out, flinging an arm around a tree to pull yourself forwards faster, “where’s your room back at the hotel? I didn’t see you anywhere there until I knocked at Seoyeon’s door last night.”
“Uhh…” he hums, trudging up the steep hill, “judging from the fact that you could, mmh… well, hear everything last night. Pretty much across from Seoyeon’s room.”
So that means. Across from your room, too.
Of course.
Why would higher deities put him on another floor if he could be right in front of your gaze?
Keeping yourself from rolling your eyes, you ask instead, “Are you enjoying yourself so far?”
“Yep. My friends are fun and…”
And finding a new hook-up every night to fuck their brains out is for sure entertaining, too.
“...And I think it’s kinda cool that we met here.”
Oh.
Is it? Perhaps. Could be, yeah – maybe it is, ignoring the tension between you and the weird ache in your heart and…
You heave a sigh.
For a while, you stroll up next to each other in silence. The walk to a higher cliff feels more like a march, and your chest falls heavier, your feet bare and tired. But determined, you keep the energy up, relieved when the cliff comes into sight.
Your face is heated, and you tuck your hair behind your ears. Jungkook observes you; takes in the gentle movements of your hands, the slow walk… the changes of your body. You’ve grown well.
And in turn, you glance at him when he looks away.
His golden chest sparkles, and you bite your lip. You feel like a teenager again, thrown back into younger, more naive years. You wish you could indulge in the feeling and forget the ominous occurrence from last night… his moans through your walls, the unfading lust.
But then, you remember the look in his eyes when he saw you; like he forgot about Seoyeon momentarily.
You remember his small hey. Remember the shock when you walked away.
And then, you remember all those lost years…
“Jungkook,” you suddenly blurt, coming to a halt to look at him.
“Yeah?”
He looks flabbergasted, eyebrows raised. Awaits your thoughts as you collect words on your tongue. Brave and curious, you clear your throat, your voice surprisingly steady when you ask, “Where did you go back then?”
If anyhow possible, his confusion grows further.
“I… I never went anywhere.”
“But… I don’t know,” you start, shrugging your shoulders. You turn away and begin to walk away, though slower now. “Not to me either, right? We never went on vacation anymore, yeah, but it felt like I lost a friendship I really cherished.”
Where’s the flood of words suddenly coming from? A minute ago you were asking each other how you were doing. Discussing studies and jobs. Cliff diving.
What’s wrong with you and your tongue?
But Jungkook doesn’t seem to mind. Instead, he furrows his eyebrows, shooting back an answer as though he came prepared, “I don’t think we lost each other. I just think we grew up.”
“No,” you defend, laughing in slight mock, “you got a girlfriend.”
He knows what you’re implying. During all those years of waiting, without ever talking things through with you or experiencing a semblance of a fight in the first place, he still reckoned you had those questions floating in your mind.
When a friendship breaks, one side of it often blames the other.
And he knows you’re throwing the blame at him.
“And we both graduated, too,” he argues. For some time, he felt guilty for abandoning you and living his life – until he realised that it wasn’t really abandonment at all. “We got busy.”
“No, I… saw your social media updates. A new girl tagged you every week.” You attempt your best to keep your voice light. To not slip into a tone judgemental enough to let your peaceful conversations derail. “And you posted pictures of new girls every now and then, too. Then you found your girlfriend and…”
You sigh, lifting your shoulders, “And that was it.”
“We just lived our lives,” Jungkook adds calmly, stepping onto the cliff you sought out. “You can’t guilt trip anyone for that.”
Yeah.
He’s right. You can’t guilt trip anyone for going with the flow of life.
After all, he wasn’t the first and last friend you lost.
Several more relationships broke after him. You waded through heartbreaks, overthought endless nights, got drunk until the world swayed. Like a normal human being, you’ve gathered memories and learned things.
You assume it was the same for him.
Life went on – and you can’t criticise him for it. But…
“It would’ve just been nice to know that it was the last vacation, right?” you say, smiling a bit. “None of us knew.”
“There was no way to know. I wish I’d known, too.”
The quiet that settles upon his words feels a little less peaceful than before. The aching heaviness of your past tugs at your heart and drags it down – you’re not sure if tackling this conversation was a good or bad idea.
But at least, the silence helps you close the topic. Mutually.
Like before, you wait near the edge of the cliff, repeating the process – staring into the water.
Jumping and diving doesn’t seem so frightening anymore… there are scarier things in life.
You gaze into the horizon, watch the sun go down. It’s the island sun – the one that differs from the one in the city. It’s bigger and brighter; prettier, soaking the ocean in a light orange that smiles at you sweetly.
And you think—
No one ever gets tired talking of the moon and the stars. But no one truly appreciates the sun. People curse at it and hate that it burns their bodies, but they never really rethink what the sun does for them; building a balance in the world, avoiding everlasting ice, burning hot to keep humanity alive.
An inspiration for art and literature, sharing its soul with the moon.
If there was any way, you wouldn’t just opt for the stars million light years away, but for the one your very own planet orbits, too.
Jungkook looks over at you; somehow, he resembles both the stars and this very sun. He angles his head, watches your features. And when you feel his stare linger, you lift one corner of your lips and ask, “Do you think the sun is closer at the end of the horizon, too?
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On a sunny, bright island like yours night descends late. You’re not sure where time flies or when darkness settles over the island – between the conversation with Jungkook and the hunt for your little group, only moments seem to pass.
But once dinner becomes long overdue and the guided tour ends, you find yourself sauntering along the lines of restaurants with Chae’s arm around you. Your feet are tired, your steps idle, but you can’t go to sleep when cocktail hour is just starting and your demonic stomach grumbling.
The restaurants are prettily arranged, close to the edge of the pavement; guests who choose a seat near the window can glance down into the sea. It reminds you a lot of Venice where waiters and waitresses attempt to lure you in by shouting the delicacies on their menus.
It’s pretty much the same here, but quieter, a little more peaceful. And in all honesty – the meals are the same everywhere anyway, just sold for different prices.
When you reach a place the couple in your group finds a liking in, you’re still looking down. A few metres ago, you detected Jungkook and his travel companions, laughing about a joke you didn’t hear, and a girl on his other side that you didn’t see at breakfast.
You guess it’s his latest fling.
Who could care about seeing the same face every night when there are so many bodies to explore, right? You can’t blame him.
Considering this logic, you can even ignore the sharp, uncomfortable tingling in your chest.
“What do you think of lasagna?” Seokjin asks, pointing somewhere on the fancy menu.
“Feeling something lighter today,” you tell him, skimming the pages, “but I will order a shit ton of appetisers and desserts. The amount of salt water I swallowed made me so goddamn hungry.”
“You were swimming most of the time, weren’t you?” Seoyeon asks, hands folded on top of the closed menu. She’s always the fastest to decide.
Well. Yeah.
Not counting the endless, strange dialogue with Jungkook, high above the sea level, sitting on the cliff… yeah, you could say you swam a lot.
Chae smiles at a waiter, ready to order, and he lifts a friendly finger to gesture he’d be with you in a moment. She leans forwards to you, empathy in her eyes as she asks, “You can totally choose to ignore this question.”
You already know what’s coming.
“But that was Jeon Jungkook you spoke to all day, yeah?”
Chae and Seokjin would remember.
During the very last summer you came here, the couple was freshly in love, close to making their relationship official official. On those days, you found it odd to bring a partner to a vacation with you, considering that you weren’t a fan of cropping people out of pictures in case things didn’t work out.
But they are both college sweethearts. Met in an abandoned library, fell in love harder than you considered possible in the real human world, outside the cinema screen or young adult novels. They broke up for a few months when you started college, and got back together after a heated argument and many, many tears.
Now, they’re still going strong. And after all those years, Chae still remembers the little boy you were in love with.
“I know, it’s… it’s crazy,” you say with a laugh, interrupted by the waiter’s presence.
With minor mishaps, you order your dinner for tonight, and once he walks away, you continue, “Even crazier if I told you how I met him here first.”
Next to you, Seoyeon laughs, placing her head in her hand, “Yeah. Even I’m still laughing about it. But I do feel bad, too.”
“No reason whatsoever. It’s not like you knew.”
“Yeah, but…” she begins. You’re not sure if she’s oblivious to your tone or trying to rub a wound as she says, “I wouldn’t have done it if I’d known. But now that I did…” She looks at you. “If you wanna start anything with him, go for it, ‘cause this guy’s dick is—”
“Don’t. Please,” Seokjin interrupts and you sigh in relief, looking to the side to hide your grimace, “I knew the boy when he still couldn’t tie his shoes. You’re just gonna make it weird.”
Chae throws a pitiful look at you, lifting a corner of her lips in sympathy. Seokjin leans back, points at you and chuckles, “In fact, I don’t know if you remember, but it was me who taught him.”
“Yes,” you nod, your voice too quiet in a teeming crowd. You swallow the knot in your throat; then say, “I remember. It took him so long, he renounced hanging out with me for a full day. Just to practise.”
“Do you… uh, are you gonna talk to him again?” Seoyeon asks, fiddling with her pearl earrings. “Or do you think things are too weird between you?”
“Why? You want permission to try it with him again?” you joke.
She sips on her drink for a moment before she puffs out a laugh, waving a hand in declination, “No. God, no, I don’t lack morality this much. I just think—”
She hesitates. Your face lifts and you look at her in anticipation, waiting until she tells you, “I just feel like you guys have a few things to talk about.”
You blink at her, clearly confused, not quite comprehending her words. She doesn’t know Jungkook – you wonder where the sixth sense is coming from.
“Why would you think that?” you ask.
“Well, things went dead after you knocked. He told me he knows you and that you used to be best friends and whatnot, and when I asked just one thing after that, he said he had to leave,” she explains, licking her lips, “and he did. Had to rely on my own hands afterwards.”
Seokjin laughs a little and you attempt a weak smile – but your thoughts reside in a different realm, far from your restaurant table. You don’t know what to focus on.
That he left, presumably because of you? That he didn’t answer her question, whatever it was? That his first instinct at the cliffs was to approach you, and stay with you?
What does it mean – what does he think or feel?
“What was it that you asked?” you want to know; your heart thumps in your throat.
“Well, just th–” Seoyeon begins, and the three of you lean in, listening to her attentively.
But before she can speak on, the waiter interrupts, cheerful announcements of your dinner following before he wishes bon appetit and walks away. And then, the topic shifts; the atmosphere changes.
Seoyeon must know that you’re eager to hear her thoughts, but once the conversation settles on irrelevant, everyday topics again, the both of you reckon that the moment has already passed.
So you eat your dinner in silence, merely listening to the couple’s and Seoyeon’s rambles. Usually, you like to converse – you have something to say to everything. But your mind doesn’t want to cooperate tonight.
Keeps shifting… Keeps overthinking…
The only moment when your stupor finally breaks arrives close to when you’re chewing your last bites and downing the last sips of your wine. Because there he is again – snickering and happy, perhaps a little drunk judging the light rosy blush on his face.
With his hands tugged in his pockets, Jungkook walks past your open restaurant with happiness plastered on his face. He’s without his friends, but not alone. And he doesn’t look at you; probably doesn’t really notice you. Too distracted by the girl’s sweet smile, matching his tender eyes.
She walks next to him, her sundress swaying in the breeze, and she’s babbling about something he seems to enjoy. His eyes are sparkling.
It’s unfair.
That you keep drowning in memories and thoughts of him, constantly wondering what he might be thinking; wondering if his mind floats back to you, too.
Evidently not.
And why you’re not enjoying the night and your vacation just like him, you don’t really understand.
So you walk through the place determined once the bill is paid. Hit up the cocktail bar from yesterday again, drunk on Cosmopolitans and other shenanigans. You talk to strangers, lose touch with Seokjin and the others.
The night advances in a way you didn’t expect, but in a way you should’ve strived towards from the beginning. Killing your worries and flirting the day away is much more fun than thinking about a certain doe-eyed man who’s become a stranger now anyway.
Who’s wetting his dick with the help of a girl neither of you knows.
That’s okay.
Hoseok, the guy you just met near the open dancefloor, has a radiant smile anyway – men like Jungkook might not compare after all. And you bet Hoseok’s dick works just perfectly fine. At least he has pretty hands. And amazing hair.
He says he’s a dancer, which is a bonus – means he knows how to move. He seems kind, lovely, very, very funny.
That’s absolutely okay.
It takes you a few attempts to unlock your hotel room, and you giggle through the awkwardness; one that Hoseok soon kisses away. Your moans echo off the walls and his lips roam your body – he has pretty lips, heart-shaped.
“You’re literally the hottest woman on this island,” he whispers in between nibbles.
Though, his nibbles feel strange; a little too harsh, scarring your skin. Then, he proceeds to undress you slowly… but in the process, he ruins your undies – because judging the sound, he threw it half into the cup of tea you left standing this morning.
“Flattered you would think s–so,” you stutter, and you’re certain he takes it as a sign of pleasure. But in reality, his drunk self presses his body onto yours with all his strength, cutting all air supply. “You’re not… bad either.”
Or maybe he is.
You’re sure he doesn’t lose himself like that when he’s sober. It’s just – that Hoseok is drunk. Very drunk. Out of his mind enough to barely walk in a straight line. No matter your own level of intoxication, you could at least distinguish an empty hallway from a wall.
And when enough is enough, and things just don’t sit right with you, you call out his name and tell him to stop. He’s kind enough to oblige; stares into your eyes as he mumbles, “Did I do something wrong?”
“Yeah… actually,” you tell him, taking a deep breath, “I just don’t think we go well together and… I think I don’t want this after all.”
Hoseok is civil, and truly kind. Because he backs off immediately, oscillating a bit, but his voice is honeysweet as he agrees, “Okay, babe. Totally fine by me.” He lays on the bed for a second, then looks around your room – and eventually murmurs, “I’ll go then.”
“Are you gonna find your way back?”
“Yep, no worries! One of my friends is in this hotel, gonna crash there. And sorry.”
You’re not certain if it’s allowed to bring someone in from outside. You know Hoseok rented a cottage the way you would years ago, but you reckon it’s too far now. And if he’s determined to do things his way, you won’t stop him.
He’s still apologising once you lead him out the door, and you nod and smile, reassuring that everything is okay. The bop of your head only stops once he’s gone and you detect figures across from you.
The hallway is lit, but your blurry mind needs a moment to recognise them. They exchange hushed words, conversing softly, and once your eyes refocus, you see Jungkook’s mouth lift to a smile, much like the girl’s.
From what you can hear from here, he’s apologising to her, and she shrugs her shoulders; her voice whispering, “Oh, it’s all good. I get it.”
You feel bad for eavesdropping – and you’re close to sneaking inside again before you hear her walk away slowly. A sigh sounds through the hallway, and his fingers brush his hair back. He leans against the frame of your door like you, and once he sees you, your eyes drop to the ground immediately.
But then, you guess it’s too late to play coy anyway.
So you pull the card key out of the power slot inside your room and step outside, flashing a smile to which he responds in kind. Fiddling his fingers awkwardly, he says, “Guess we’re in the same boat, huh?”
And you laugh, nodding in amusement as you answer, “Guess so.”
“What did yours do?”
“Couldn’t distinguish pleasurable nibbles from actual bites.”
Jungkook grimaces in psychosomatic pain, scrunching his nose. An old habit of his, genuine and sweet. “Ah…” His eyes dart to and fro, perhaps looking for bite marks; and when you assume that he doesn’t find any, he meets your gaze again. “Are you hurt?”
“No, no, he… wasn’t that bad. I just. Wasn’t feeling it,” you explain. He hums as you nod towards the general direction in which the girl disappeared, following Hoseok’s steps. “What’s with her?”
“I wasn’t feeling it either. Didn’t enjoy it.”
“Not as much as last night, huh?”
Jungkook huffs and clicks his tongue; shakes his head yes subtly, but then says, “I don’t remember much of it anymore.” He waits, shuffling his feet, swallowing. “Your friend is kind, but she was also… uhm— very loud without me doing much.”
Ah…
That’s what it was. The yelling, the curses, the inhumane sounds.
Why do you feel relieved about it?
With a slight groan, you take a seat against the wall opposite his room, and he joins, sliding down next to his door. You angle your legs and he crosses his fingers folded in his lap. There are several tattoos on his hand and arm – you wish he could break them down for you.
Matching his tender smile, you look at him for a while; and then, you point to his door, admit that, “I didn’t expect to see you here on the island, but… I expected for your room to be so close to mine even less.”
“I know. It’s a strange wonder.”
Is it a wonder? Or is it a curse? Because you haven’t been able to think properly since last night.
You pull out loose threads from your shorts and form tiny, little balls out of them. Anything to avoid his eyes; they’re tender, but for some reason, they feel piercing to you.
“I saw Seokjin today,” he says. It’s bizarre to hear your cousin’s name out of Jungkook’s mouth; it feels familiar somehow, but new at the same time. “And he hasn’t aged a bit.”
Your lips crack open, and a sudden laugh slips out of your mouth – you’re not certain if it’s your giggle or the thumping of your heart that sounds through the hallway louder. You can hear both ringing in your ears.
But when you look at him, the beat of it stills for a second; and when he smiles again, it returns more vigorously. This is ridiculous – none of this should be crumpling up your soul like that.
It used to happen in a different lifetime, in an alternate universe, right here on the grounds of this island. It’s over. It’s done.
Done, done, done.
Stop trying to break out of your cage, you stupid organ – I’ve kept you well hidden for so long.
His large orbs look back at you in patience. He has his head thrown back against the wall, and his brilliant skin shines in the light; melatonin so beautiful that you want to brush your fingers against his jaw and cheekbones.
“You have,” you then admit, digging your fingers into your palms. If you don’t, you might reach out to him after all. “Changed, I mean.”
“You think?”
“Yeah, your jaw. It’s like you cut it this sharp with a knife.” Jungkook snickers, and you take it as a positive sign; the current bookshop owner seems to enjoy your weak metaphors. “You look taller, too. And lost the baby fat. Plus, your eyes don’t look as big anymore as they used to.”
But there’s still a starry night and an ocean swimming in them – like a deity took all waters and every spot of the universe and threw it into his gaze.
And if his face has become bigger and his eyes smaller… how were you ever able to look away all those years ago?
“You’ve changed, too,” he tells you, looking to the carpeted ground, “and lost your teenage innocence, too. I think you used to dress very differently… but you look more comfortable now. Content with yourself.”
Yeah – teenage years are a hurdle to overcome.
You might’ve struggled with your confidence when you were younger, but you guess that with those worries ghosting around your head, you ticked off another young adult experience off your list.
Adult life made you stronger and self-assured; he’s right. You reckon that with his luck in grades, friends, and girlfriends, his ego was already doing just fine.
Perhaps that’s why you parted – you guess he didn’t need you anymore.
“Do you… still live in the same house, by the way?” Jungkook asks.
“Ah, nah, I don’t.” You let your legs fall to cross them like him, wiggling your toes according to the rhythm of your heart. Anything to keep you focused. “I live in my own apartment now, but it’s not too far from our old house.”
“I see,” he remarks, thinking and humming for a second, “I live with Taehyung now. He’s two years older than me. Kinda lives his life at a faster pace, but he’s been my friend since college. And it clicks, so…”
“Yeah, I figured you’re not in a relationship or… well, married.”
Jungkook cocks an eyebrow and shakes his head, confirming your theory with a playfully and overly dramatic shiver. He mouths a no, grimaces a little; forms a cross with his arms.
And once his little act is over, he asks, “Why, are you?”
“Hell no.”
The amusement between you erupts in the form of a breathy laugh; you might be a little too loud, perhaps a disturbance among the sleeping folk. But you always used to be noisy. Never felt ashamed of your ugly chuckles or the wild flinging of your limbs – the tears in your eyes and the ache in your tummy were a delightful feeling blossoming in your body.
His presence really takes you back.
Even as a kid, you would always tell him you’d never get married – and in turn, he’d vow to you that he would only tie the knot once he owned an Audi.
You wonder if he’s purchased one now.
“This is so strange,” Jungkook whispers out of the blue.
His eyelids are shut, but once he utters the last syllable, they flutter apart, looking at you so attentively that you think he might be studying you. You and your new features, like a new novel, analysing and interpreting its content.
“What is?” you ask.
“I was just thinking about our summers together a few weeks ago,” he admits. A tattooed digit taps against his knee. “Booking this hotel and flight reminded me of them. And… you were the first person who came to mind.”
In some sense, it’s only natural for you to pop up in his thoughts. There’s not that much more that connects you both to the soil of this island. To the trees, the waterfalls and the forest. In hindsight, you guess that his face was the first thing that flashed in your memory, too.
“Of course I was,” you tease, and he smirks, “we were attached to the hip.”
“Yeah. You’d never leave me, because you liked liked me.”
Instinctively, you roll your eyes. You notice that since you took a seat on the ground, the corners of your lips never really dropped. In the world of emotions, a good sign.
For your sanity, maybe not so.
“Shut up,” you defend, tutting, “says you. You’d come crying to me after the tiniest incidents. The boy who’d complain about tiny scratches wouldn’t have survived in this wilderness without me.”
“I would have. I just chose to seek refuge in your presence.”
You fall as quiet as a mouse.
The well-spoken, heart-wrenching confession scrambles your thoughts a little. Combines today and yesterday into one – and long before you know it, his face in the moment moulds with pictures of the past.
For the umpteenth time since yesterday, your mind wanders off to the innocence he once portrayed. His huge eyes and his bread buns. Lips pouting at you.
He’d tell you how his foot grazed a sharp rock underwater; how the salt of the ocean burned on the wound; how nature betrayed him when he was just trying to swim to the edge of the world.
You’d shut down his dreamy babbling and keep applying ointment on the bleeding wounds, and he’d watch or look into the far distance. Converse with you when he could think of something to talk about. He could slip into mean and teasing moods on other days, but in those moments when you tended to his injuries, he didn’t dare to talk back to you.
For some time, you had the upper hand over the shy, little boy.
Then, you grew older.
Then, hormones rampaged.
And then, a summer tumbled in when he became a snarky teenager, rolling his eyes at you, flicking your forehead before pulling you into a suffocatingly tight bear hug. Jungkook liked to hold you, and he held you closest before you lost his affection that year.
After that, it was your heart that became the bleeding wound.
You throw your head back; now the smile has fallen – perhaps not enough for him to notice, but enough to match the storm inside you.
Your eyes well up, your waterline damp; you close them, sniffling, attempting to control and steady your voice as you say, “I did… I really did like you. I think for some time you were the biggest crush I had.”
Jungkook’s eyebrows shoot up, and behind the calm gaze that never falters, you think his mind whirrs. He’s as taken aback as you are. Positively astonished that you said what you just said. Was it a mistake?
“Really?” he asks. After ages of veiled feelings, he must be flattered, maybe impressed or baffled. You just wish his expressions revealed any of it. “You never told me.”
But at least none of the things that course through his head seem to resemble negativity – the softness of his eyes spurs you on, so you tell him, “I didn’t need to. I knew you didn’t feel the same way.” You shrug your shoulders, pressing your lips into a line for a second. “And when we were old enough to confess, we went separate ways.”
Jungkook lifts a finger in defence, voicing a small uh-uh before he corrects, “We didn’t part right away. We met once after that, on my birthday. Went to watch a musical, do you remember?”
Ah. The famous night out. The one that confused your friends as much as his. You couldn’t blame them, though. Celebrating until three in the morning, with no one else around but you – watching a romantic musical? Sounds suspicious to an outsider for sure.
“Oh, I do,” you admit, “that night you told me you’d write your own theatrical piece one day. Did you ever?”
The fact that you still know tugs at his heartstrings – apparently, remembering isn’t always a bad thing.
“Not yet, no. Maybe someday,” Jungkook explains. “It’s still kinda a dream of mine. And…” He points at you with a flat hand, raised to the ceiling and nods slightly. “I have to thank you for that. It was an amazing night.”
He waits ten seconds. His voice is quieter now, dripping in fatigue. The silence brings back the exhaustion to you, too; the dozen activities you indulged in today start catching up to you. But you hear his words clear as day, and they evoke something in you that might haunt you even after you’ve fallen asleep.
“And I know it was my birthday, but I actually had something I wanted to give you. From this island.”
Now that’s a confession if you’ve ever heard one.
One you don’t know what to do with. He never gave it to you, did he? What’s the point in informing you about this, dwelling in something you can never revive. Or maybe, it just doesn’t affect him much.
Perhaps you’re the sole existence in this hallway who feels the sting.
“Really? What was it?” you ask. Curiosity wins the fight – it barely matters that you might not see the little present he picked up from here. “Why didn’t you bring it to me?”
“Because…”
There are various reasons you can think of.
He forgot. He didn’t meet you again. It was his day, so that’s where he kept his focus fixated on. Maybe it just wasn’t important.
Various reasons you can conjure – but the one he utters is not one of them.
“I got scared?” Jungkook bites his lip, looks at you with remorse and questions in his eyes. “After knowing you for years, I shouldn’t have been, though. And if you want to know what it is… I can totally take you out for a drink once we’re back in town. And show it to you.”
Fondness. Nostalgia. Memories.
He keeps fuelling those.
“You…” you begin, gulping, “you still have it?”
“Yeah?” He laughs; then adds, “That must be so weird to you.”
“No,” you fight immediately, eyebrows rocketing to the sky, “it’s… it’s sweet.”
Jungkook’s head tilts a few degrees; enough to suggest unbridled affection.
Maybe you’re still drunk and imagining the care floating between you – similarly to when you were younger, collecting rocks and shells. When he’d listen to you as you cherished new spots on the beach, jabbing your chest with a smile that never fell; one he might’ve thought you never noticed.
But you can’t crack his expression or whatever lingers behind it. Because soon after, he stands, pushing himself off the ground, and opens his hotel room door with drooping eyes. He steps inside, but keeps the entrance open; looks at you when you’re dusting off your shorts.
He doesn’t wish you sweet dreams. Doesn’t even utter a small, soft good night.
What he says is worse.
“Hey… if you really think I didn’t like you back… then you don’t remember everything well enough.”
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The first kiss.
It’s the first kiss you’d stuffed into a corner of your mind, suppressing and forgetting something a teenager usually never forgets.
With a cup of tea warming your hands, you gaze at the fog-shrouded dawn. You can barely believe that you’re awake already, though you feel your eyelids drop – perhaps, you’ll go back to sleep once the soothing effect of your drink kicks in.
For now, your thoughts are flying back. Way back in time, away from this island, into a past you would repeat if you could.
You must have been seventeen; in your most sensitive years, rebelling against everyone, discovering new parts of you. Jungkook came to your place on a spring day before your last summer together, and what started as a harmless affair of hanging out together, soon turned into something more.
Something more… hopeful.
Kneeling in your garden, you plucked a rose from the ground. Jungkook didn’t like ripping flowers from their home, and he’d always scold you when you did. Only this time, your juvenile nose scrunch and your hilariously pursed lips caught his attention.
You brought the rose to your mouth, pressing the gentlest kiss onto one petal. From behind you, you heard him say, “You don’t kiss guys like that, right?”
“What if I do?”
“Well, it looked… funny.”
“You look funny.”
You lifted your body from the ground, walking to him in tiny steps. He had pulled the porch chair to the railing to watch you closely; his chin poked the folded hands he’d placed on top of the railing.
Tired from the warm day, you fell onto the chair next to him, seeking shadows and reprieve for your burning eyes. He moved his head until his cheek fell against the back of his hands, a young teenage face awaiting your answer with the same old pout.
“You know I’ve never kissed anyone,” you told him, leaning back.
You didn’t look at him; somehow, discussing something with him as intimate as this felt odd. With the guy who, yes, as you’d realised, you’d undoubtedly fallen for.
Intimacy was usually not that big of an issue for you – he’d know when you were on your period. And he’d poke fun at you for the peculiar patterns on your underwear when you unpacked your bag on the island.
You had kicked him in the balls more often than you could count, and you laughed about his voice cracks whenever they occurred. You were mean to each other, but it derived from affection. An innate feeling of deep, everlasting – platonic – love.
“And you know I never mean it,” Jungkook said, squinting one eye. The sun was going down behind you. “I’ve told you I’ve never kissed anyone either.”
“I know. I’m not mad at you.”
You puffed your cheeks, taking a deep breath. In the spring, everything smelled of sunshine, hope and a fresh breeze. Every year, most of the scent and the feeling of the season remained the same.
With Jungkook however, this year felt different. The spring blossomed a bit harsher.
“Everything at its time,” Jungkook then preached, and you hummed, smiling at him.
“But it’d be nice to know how it feels.”
What a cliché scenario, straight out of a high school movie. You should’ve seen it coming, should’ve known how the dialogue would go. But maybe that was the reason – maybe you’d watched enough rom coms to know where it’d lead.
Because you wanted things to lead there.
You weren’t sure, though, whether he’d play along, follow the script you’d seen a hundred times before. And when he did, you were taken aback anyway, hearing him suggest, “And if… if we…?”
He inched closer, dark hair falling into his face. The oversized shirt swung in the wind along with his tresses; and he looked serious. Pressing his lips together, earnest eyes staring at you… nervous for your ultimate answer.
But all you managed, still frozen and bedazzled, was a meek, “Really?”
“Yeah.”
“Wait, you’re actually serious?”
“Yeah…”
Okay.
So far he was adhering to the script – though, some of your confusion and shock really wasn’t played. The movies and shows you watched were based on clichés, yes; but then again, those tropes came from somewhere, right?
Unbelievable that you were in your own drama now – where were the cameras hiding?
Today, the memory is faded and dull, and you remember only broken pieces of it like it’s a chipped, tattered dream. But what you do still know is that your body moved closer without you fully registering it.
That you, albeit with a ridge between your eyebrows, whispered a little, “Okay.”
And that everything after happened way too fast to store up in your memory.
Jungkook wetted his lips, breathing through his mouth. His hands were moving awkwardly, confused how to hold you. Your chairs were too far apart, and when he started leaning in, he craned his neck – holding onto the railing with one hand to not fall forwards.
A fleeting laugh broke out of you; a full and sweet sound straight out of your chest.
You shifted your chairs closer to the other’s, still shaking your heads and giggling. And then, suddenly, in the middle of your melded happiness, he placed a palm on your face. Held you for a second, smiled, took a deep breath and asked, “Can I?”
“Yeah,” you answered; your fingers wandered up to his arm, crawling under his black tee sleeves unintentionally. “Yes, go ahead.”
“Okay.”
He was nervous; visibly shaking. And you were a ticking time bomb, too. Close to laying open all the thoughts circling around him.
“Okay,” he said once more, as though he was encouraging himself.
Which seemed to work – because when he closed his eyes, leaned in and pressed his soft lips against yours, something in you broke. A timid inner self that drowned in the bittersweet feeling…
Your shoulders fell and your body dissolved into dust… you hadn’t known kissing could consist of such a gorgeous feeling.
But somehow, you had known kissing Jeon Jungkook would be a dazzling sensation.
For less than thirty seconds, his mouth moved against yours – sighing and humming. He backed away for a teeny tiny moment, just a teeny tiny inch. And then he dove in again, angling his head to the other side, repeating the procedure.
His fingers held your chin, lips parting yours. You wondered if he thought of you as just as big of a liar as you did of him – because had he really never kissed anyone before you?
You only noticed that it was over when he brushed a finger along your face, suddenly chuckling as he said, “Now we know what it feels like.”
“Yeah…” you agreed, your voice still feeble and unsteady. “So…”
“So…”
“What did it feel like?”
You weren’t near any ocean back then, but somehow, your emotions overlapped the same way waves of the sea do. In the cosiness of your home, you missed holding his hand at the beach. Your heart operated differently on your little island. 
Maybe things wouldn’t have ended at the kiss there, but evolved to more.
But even that spring day when his lips moved against yours…
There was a particular way Jungkook looked at you. He knew you knew – or at least, he assumed you knew. Spring doesn’t just let flowers bloom… he thought you noticed. And he thought he saw something in the shimmer behind your eyes, too.
You held his hand for a bit longer; you couldn’t remember when your fingers had slipped into his. You felt the butterflies, scolded your weak limbs, thought you heard his beating heart.
None of you acted upon the things you saw in each other’s gaze – today, you’re sorry that the both of you were such cowards.
If you had reacted back then, would things be different now?
But… maybe it doesn’t matter anyway. Maybe it suffices to remember what he answered to your inquiry.
And – what did it feel like to him?
“That must have been the most beautiful thing I’ve ever done.”
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You’re thankful for the extra hours you slept in this morning. If you hadn’t, you might not be able to wander along the beach now, surrounded by peaceful darkness.
You and your group spoiled yourself with low-energy-activities today: walking on the sand of the shore; lying in the shadow of beach umbrellas; swimming far out into the sea where the noises faded and water splashed around you, sometimes wild, sometimes tender.
Despite the refreshing morning, you think you dozed off under the sun for a good hour. And following it up with a big meal at dinner and a generally lazy day, you decided that you needed to see the beach at night at least once – the way you used to.
The view in the dark is the prettiest anyway.
You didn’t see Jungkook all day. You don’t know what he did or who he did it with, but his absence made the afternoon and evening quite uneventful. Not any less spectacular – but at least there were no sudden occurrences of heart palpitations.
But as they say – speaking of the devil.
In the distance, you see a figure approach. His hands are tugged in the pockets of dark shorts, and sandals whirl up the sand behind him.
He’s grinning from one side to the other, letting his head fall sideways, and you laugh along with a shake of your head before you question, “It’s always you, huh?”
Always him who you meet in the most unexpected moments; when no one’s around.
“It’s always us,” he corrects, “alone.”
“Where are your friends?”
“Uhh. Well, two went to sleep, ‘cause they still felt hungover from last night. Weaklings if you ask me,” Jungkook jests, stopping when he’s stepped close enough. “And the last one likes going for drinks alone. Where are your people?”
“Sleeping, Jungkook. It is late.”
He shrugs his shoulders in innocence. His hair floats in the evening gust, baring his forehead. The shirt he’s wearing is loose, but the definition of his chest and bicep still seep through. And the moles on his neck… god, you missed the moles scattered over his skin…
His head darts left and right. He watches the sea for a moment longer than the faraway bars and restaurants on the other side. Loiters in the darkness with you – and you watch quietly until he asks, without really looking at you, “Aren’t you scared?”
You puff out a breath, dragging the thin shawl wrapped around your torso over your shoulders, and query, “Do you think I’m still ten?”
“No,” he laughs, shifting his focus back to you. His eyes fall to your feet and travel up your body slowly. “Definitely not.”
A smug grin plays around his lips, and you click your tongue, stepping aside just a few inches to spread your shawl on the sand. You take a seat with a deep sigh, inviting him next to you with a pat on the fabric.
Jungkook joins you wordlessly, pulling his hands out of his pockets. One of his palms presses into the sand for a moment, and he rubs his hands together to shake the grains off.
In silence, you watch his tiny action… then his parted mouth, the sharp edges of his face – until you break out of your reverie and remark, “Considering that we both came on this vacation with our own group, it’s odd that we keep meeting alone.”
“Must be fate,” he only says; the same old song he liked to croon.
Fate, yeah? What does fate want from you exactly?
What are the signals it’s sending you?
You ask him, “You still believe in that?” He nods proudly, lifting one shoulder as if to say, and what about it? “You know, Jungkook… your face and body might have changed, but you’re still the same.”
“Hmmm,” he hums, “everything else around me kept changing. If I’d changed too, I wouldn’t have recognised the world anymore.”
He moves his head to look at you. It’s soft, his gaze. Like a cushion – gentler than the sand under you.
Analysing his eyes, you could almost assume that you cross his mind as much as he does yours. From the very first night, he hasn’t left your thoughts once; you wonder what effect seeing you had on him. And… speaking of…
Nervous and shifting a bit, you lick your dry lips; take a deep breath, and then mutter, “Can I ask you something?”
He nods slowly, his stare drifting. He looks at the horizon as you gather courage, and his expression doesn’t move an inch when you ask, “Seoyeon told me that you left soon after I knocked, because she said something to you… and I was wondering… what was it?”
If you’ve gone too far, he doesn’t address it. Instead, he hums, and then answers unafraid, “I told her we used to be close. We were just conversing, but she said I didn’t look okay… asked if I wanted to talk about it.”
“Really? And… what did you say?”
“I said no. I didn’t wanna talk about it… I also didn’t know what it was.”
He shrugs his shoulders, unaffected; but your heart burns. The thought of rendering him speechless enough to stop an entire intimate act makes your nerves flare. Whatever went through his mind, you were undoubtedly the cause for it.
“Why did you leave afterwards?” you query, your voice quieter, more apprehensive now. “I thought you two–”
“I’m… I’m not saying it was a bad night,” he interrupts, shaking his head, “but how else would one react? Imagine you’re seeing someone who used to be important to you after almost a decade again… the previous mood was gone. Body didn’t cooperate.”
Too lost in thoughts. In memories. In dreams.
Too much flooded back. The island stopped feeling like a vacation once more and became the paradise you had shared with him in another life, another multiverse.
You don’t need to imagine it – you know what he means.
Something bubbles warm in your stomach and leaves you speechless. There’s not much you can respond with, or much you can fight. Like the urge to go back in time and to keep him sweetly close to you.
You wish you could do something, so he doesn’t have to talk about someone important in the past tense.
“I’m not scared, by the way,” you tell him after a while, nodding your head towards the ocean, “I’m enjoying this a lot.”
“Your peace of mind.”
He’s referring to the tranquillity that pulled you into tender slumbers when you used to visit the beach. Even with him next to you, you’d sometimes doze off under the noon sun – and he’d let you, allow you your peace of mind.
“Life throws so damn many hurdles our way,” you start; the scent of the sea has begun touching your sentimental nerves, “when I look at the ocean and the way it… I don’t know, shimmers, it feels like the water floods those worries away.”
“Yeah… it did always feel like it brought me relief and distracted me from my problems, too.”
Or maybe, it was you. Right by his side. Like now.
You stretch your legs in front of you – it doesn’t matter to you that your skin presses against the cold ground underneath. Sitting here, with the former man of your dreams no less, is more peaceful than you imagined.
No heart palpitations.
At least, until he speaks again.
“Will I ever see you again once we’re back in town?”
Your body freezes. The only movement suggesting that you’re not a sculpture or portrait is the swinging of your hair.
The mean side of you wishes he’d asked the same damn thing years ago; but the calm and serene part of you drowns in his voice, in his words… in the urgent, hidden plea.
“You did promise to give me your ominous secret gift,” your brain manages somehow; to add onto your courage, you even muster the strength to look into his eyes.
“So yes? I can?”
“Is… that what you want?”
“I…” Jungkook waits. Tries to pick words carefully, attempts to make sense of them before he narrates, “You know how… high school is always such an important time, because you remember this bittersweet nostalgia and the friends you had?”
You nod, but he doesn’t see it, gestures of his hands accompanying his words, “The crushes… the first heartbreak. Fearing failure and bad grades, and then, graduation. As an adult, you look back at this time and kinda wonder if you could’ve done anything, anything, to make your teenage years better. To pull more out of them.”
It’s not difficult to follow the message behind his statements. But you don’t quite understand the relevance to your current conversation – so you prod, “What are you saying?”
“That… I don’t have that connection with high school. And for ages, I couldn’t figure out why. And then, I did.”
The timbre of Jungkook’s voice vibrates. With a slight shake in his tone, a masked persistence seeps to the surface, and it looks like he’s about to break.
“Because,” he begins and pauses again, biting his lower lip once, “the nostalgia that I felt all the time didn’t have anything to do with school at all. It came from somewhere entirely else and I was an idiot big enough to not make that relationship as good as it could’ve been.”
He takes a deep breath, and then adds, “So yeah. Now that you’re here, I can say it, right? I wanna see you again.”
“Jungkook…”
You don’t know what to say. And despite the sweet-sour feeling unfurling in your chest, you don’t exactly know what to feel either.
And Jungkook… he should stop now. You should walk away.
The emotional confessions materialise unexpectedly; whatever has befallen his heart and mind, it’s not calming down. At least not according to the further admissions that tumble out of him, unfiltered and raw.
“I really missed you,” he reveals in a half-whisper. Your heart breaks through your lungs and ribs and falls into your stomach. “I know you don’t believe me, because you think I abandoned you, but I missed you.”
They’re bizarre, the things he says. The past tense in his sentences. Because somehow, you even miss him now. The days as you knew them are over; no matter how close he is to you, the bond you shared couldn’t be farther away.
You laugh, though your voice is shaky; it’s the disguise you use to avoid breaking into tears.
“Kook—”
“Fuck…” he whispers. It breaks your heart… the melancholy in his eyes, the longing he emanates. But true to his nature, he turns the name into a joke, and you know what he’s going to say before he says it. “Don’t compare me to a plate of cookies again, please.”
Because that’s what you loved to do. A plate of cookies; your favourite snacks.
And Kookie.
Your Kookie.
Suddenly, you see the face of another man again. Younger, rounder, directly next to Jungkook. Uttering the same thing, but almost a decade ago.
And that’s when you break.
You stand, your shawl and your control long deserted, and leave him behind. Your hurried steps carry you away from him fast, and a single tear trails down your cheek. But you hear him catching up, blinking and wiping the droplet away, hoping he doesn’t notice.
Which he doesn’t. Because he chases after you, his words painfully oblivious as he assures, “Hey! Hey wait, it was just a joke. You know it was, and I know that stuff is behind us.”
“It’s okay!” you exclaim. “I just… I need to sleep a little.”
“You tired?”
God, he walks fast. If you started running now, you’d regret the embarrassment all your life.
“Hella,” you tell him, shouting against the wind, and camouflage your sadness and tears behind your smile.
And Jungkook, still the smartass and bigmouthed little boy you used to know him as, grabs you by your waist from behind. Swirls you through the air, drags you to the ocean despite your protests and tugs you into the water along with him.
Within a moment, you’re soaking wet, freezing. You tell him to stop, and he takes it as a joke; presses your body against his more, warm against your skin and the cold sea. He laughs, and under different circumstances, you might have melted – melted hard.
But instead, your voice shatters.
He stops within the blink of an eye, his palms suddenly on the small of your back, hauling you out of the water to bring you to a stand. He looks at you carefully. Brushes your wet hair back with softness in his touch; sees and hears the cries erupting out of you.
And you’re crying hard. Covering your face with a hand, coughing out the salty taste.
Loosening his grip around you, he wades out of the ocean. He holds your arm, suddenly panicked, and asks, “What happened?”
Your soul fractures. It’s enough… It's more than enough now.
Gathering the fragments of your heart, you tell him, “I just can’t fucking be around you… okay?”
“Why? No, I—” He pulls you back gently when you attempt to walk away, cradles your face and whispers, “Talk to me.”
Your chest tightens, and fuck, his touch is too much, way too much.
“No…”
“You… you always did.”
“Yes… I did. I did, years ago, Jungkook. Times have changed.”
You look into the groundless depths of his eyes. He’s so close to you, trying to narrate such an old tale right this time.
But you grip his hand and push him away slowly, softly, admitting, “You were my friend. You used to talk about… about freaking stars and the ocean like you’d actually seen the edge of the world, and I– I thought you’d keep telling me this shit. No, let me go—”
You force his body away, hands on his chest, and he places his fingers on your wrist, barely noticeably. He doesn’t buckle, and your sobs crack; loaded with a thousand emotions, you let out, “I called you a lot, you know? You’d always cast me aside and I’d always find out later why. Because you were busy fucking your girlfriend. Or anyone else.”
Sniffling, you step back a little, still feeling the boiling sting of his touch. “You wouldn’t even text me back.”
“I’m…” He’s out of words; you see it. “I’m sorry.”
“Really? I dunno, I just…” You swallow the thick mass in your throat, watch the regret fan out in his eyes. “I just wish you’d seen me as your best friend the way I did. If you had, you might not feel like a damn stranger to me now.”
Your words cause a flood of aching emotions – you recognise them in the shift in his expressions. Hear them when he utters, “You can’t do this. You prioritised everything over me, too. I’d see you in parks and libraries, and you would barely talk to me, no matter how much I tried.”
“Because you were never alone! And you left ten minutes later anyw—”
“And that way, you never got to know about the things I needed to tell you. That I wanted to be alone, with myself or with you, because a girlfriend could never compare to—”
“I wasn’t a fucking rebound.”
“No! No, you weren’t,” Jungkook defends, nearly yelling and you flinch. “Girlfriend or not… I wanted to be with you, because you were my friend. And yeah, my best friend, too, okay? I argued with everyone, because losing you made me moody as fuck. It made me lose my mind, okay?”
Is that what you’d waited to hear? All these years, is that what you’d wanted him to admit? That he cared about you; that he wanted you close; that your presence had become too much of a constant to live without. 
You don’t know. You don’t know.
“You weren’t the only one whose heart broke.”
He says it in a hushed whisper. Carefully, with a sunken head. And you don’t help his heartache when you laugh out of desperation, making him shift closer. He looks like he wants to shake you, though he keeps a distance between you; fires burn in his pupils.
“I’m fucking serious. Those summers meant more to me than you know. What, all my friends went to Ibiza and the Caribbean islands and Jeju Island, and they told me about the differences between the continents and whatever the fuck else.”
He’s raging. Positively burning inside out; an arsonist who takes you down with him.
“And I would always stick to this fucking island and never stray from my parents’ plans, because I knew you would be there.”
“I’m truly sorry for bothering you like that, really—”
“No. Fuck, no, I– I liked being here…”
The volume of Jungkook’s voice falls… falls until you think you’re hallucinating his next words.
“I was so in fucking love with you and… part of you never fucking left me.” He lifts his hands to rub his face; the colour of his skin has changed to a light red. He’s holding back tears, unlike you. “And I just… I fucking hate you for it.”
You nod.
Out of words… both of you.
Your brain shuts down; your heart leaks and bleeds. This is not how your vacation was supposed to go… it wasn’t supposed to open the stitches of an unhealed wound. But… why has it not healed yet?
“Okay,” you say; the singular word makes his heart snap into two halves – you see it clearly. You walk away slowly; his gaze is desperate, but he lets you go this time. “I’ll make things easier for you if you hate me so much.”
And then, you turn around. Step away with the back of your hands wiping at your cheeks – to no avail, because tears don’t just stop like that, not after a conversation like this.
You don’t hear him call out your name. He doesn’t follow you anymore, no muffled steps on the sand. Just you and your body carrying you away from him, your sight blurry and your eyes burning. Your stomach keeps flipping. 
But as déjà vu hits, you remember something yet again. Something important.
Fights in the distant past, right here at the beach, heated and accompanied by tears sometimes. The adult version of it feels gut-wrenching. Every part of your former arguments aligns with your scenario now.
But you wonder… you wonder – is really everything the same as on the days you stormed away?
You turn around. Stare into the near distance – and your throat narrows.
Because he’s still there. Sitting near the waves, legs pulled to his torso, arms wrapped around them. He’s gazing at the ocean wordlessly, never looking into your direction. If he remembers that you always used to come back, he should.
Back then, he’d always wait for something… wait for you.
Is he still waiting for you?
Outrageous…
You truly hit a snag with your travel plans. You didn’t expect to meet him for sure – expected even less to rush towards him where he sits on your shawl. You don’t know how he managed to save it from the wind… but is that really important now?
Because.
Maybe he really was in love with you.
Adrenaline pumps through your veins, and you breathe out your prohibitions.
Maybe you were too young and stupid to realise.
Your steps fasten, drawing closer to him, and when he sees you approach, his eyes blow wide. Looking at you like the lost doe that he is.
You drop to your knees, towering above him. He’s too speechless to ask you about the sudden shift in your decisions; too stunned when your fingers sneak to his neck. Your thumbs settle under his jaw and move his head up, and he lets you.
Breathing out heavily and deeply, you fall back onto your legs, wrap your arms around him and say, “You’re fucking outrageous… Jeon Jungkook.” 
Your foreheads collide for a transient moment before your lips do.
It feels nothing like it did when you were seventeen.
The purity, surrounded by a sprouting garden, doesn’t compare to the heat that courses through your body now. Your mouths part and he sighs against your skin, but he doesn’t waste a moment before he captures your lips again.
Jungkook holds onto you immediately; his hands sink to the small of your back, pulling you so close that you shiver. You slip your tongue through the seam of his lips when he tilts his head to the other side, pushing your weight against him until he falls back into the sand with you in tow.
You card through his wet locks, grip them tight, adjusting your body until you’re flush against him. He must be feeling the way your heart hammers against his. He must be – if he didn’t hear it all those years ago already.
He presses a hand between your shoulder blades, and you wrap your unoccupied fingers around his bicep, tongues dancing, tasting your shared breaths. The thud of your combined heartbeats breaks your eardrums, and you try your hardest to focus on the silky, pillowy feeling of his lips.
“Kook,” you whisper when he lets you breathe; his eyes sparkle in the pale, thin ray of moonlight. “I’m sorry—”
That doesn’t do, Jungkook thinks. So he pulls you close again; doesn’t kiss you, but shuts you up with a grazing peck, taking in the scent of your perfume, your shampoo and the ocean. Of your skin… it’s dizzying.
You look at each other with warmth flooding your bodies. The heat between you mocks the chill of the night.
Jungkook has seen a whole island change. He has let so many years pass. The world has evolved, the universe expanded – the planets kept spinning. He’s gone through more he will ever be able to fathom, because that’s what human life is.
He just… doesn’t want it without you anymore.
Whispering your name, he murmurs, “I’ve lived half a life without you and… never stopped missing your lips.”
He still reads his novels… you can tell. Still picks out metaphors and things people might not say in real life.
But this is real life – and he’s saying it to you. So many people in this world, and he’s saying it to you.
“Don’t stop then,” you plead, brushing your nose against his, “keep them on me tonight.”
Without hesitation, both your bodies come to a stand; his hand wraps around yours. And you walk along the beach line until you’re alone, back in the safe bubble that you used to retreat to long ago.
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When Jungkook opens the door to his hotel room, he doesn’t push you against a wall and kiss you unconscious. Shivering from the wet clothes, he slides the card key into the power slot and turns on a warm light. Amused eyes look at your body, pressed against his door.
There’s a statement on his lips, something snarky, you’re sure. But you fog his thoughts when you dig your fingers into his dark shirt, pulling him close to you. Your eyes pierce into his hazy ones, and his gaze seeks the depths of yours. A smile is plastered to his face that shines bright compared to the faint light of the room.
Tight in your grip, he shifts his weight from one leg to the other; and you can feel his hot, ocean scented breath on your face as he mumbles, “And now…”
“You know what now.”
Jungkook’s chest rises where your fingers hold his shirt, and when he speaks again, there’s joy as well as care in his voice, “Is that okay for you? Do you want to? We can wait and—”
“No,” you interrupt, an urgent tone in your words, “no. I waited all my life, I… I don’t wanna wait anymore.”
The beam on his face stretches brighter, his breath breaking. You recognise that he’s as nervous as you, that his veins are burning like yours.
Leaning in, he skims your lips – doesn’t kiss you yet. Then, he backs away lightly, and you, like a magnet, follow his touch. A quiet chuckle escapes his chest, but soon, it stills – a hand spreads on the back of your head before your mouths touch again.
He kisses you chastly, your sounds soft and pure.
But you’re burning up. God, this can’t be real.
The loving movement of his lips, fond against yours, like he’s calculating every move. Aware of every single touch – this can’t be real.
Your cold hands on his chest push him back a little, and his body complies, moving towards the bed until the back of his knees hits the furniture’s edge. He falls onto it, and you, eager to not waste a second, straddle him with utter keenness.
He feels like a dream… the way he looks at you; the way he dives in to kiss your neck; the way he elicits moans out of you without doing much. Your eyes flutter open, drowning in him – but when your stare drifts to his pillow, you realise…
“Kook—”
“Yeah?” His head shoots up immediately, and a palm holds your cheek cautiously, suddenly alarmed. “Do you wanna stop?”
“No…” you admit, holding him close – eliminating his worries, “absolutely not. I just—”
You nibble your lips, your eyes not quite settling on either the pillow or him, and he spurs you on, “Yeah… talk to me.”
“Can we…” Okay. This might sound ridiculous – but you want to enjoy tonight. So… “Could we move to my room? I don’t wanna… uh, I just don’t wanna do this on the same bed on which someone else and you…”
The girl from a few nights before. A girl you might not know of; perhaps someone he met before you arrived here.
And whoever else.
“You’re right,” Jungkook agrees. Your awkwardness fades when he nods, and you sigh in relief as he goes on, “Now that you say it… I don’t think I want that either. And uh…”
He hesitates. Then states, “Also. We taste a lot like salt water. Maybe we should clean up first.”
What a peculiar conversation.
But considering everything you know about him, you titter, easing the tension before you back away and come to a stand.
Coming to his room, however, doesn’t solely mean awkward emotions and even more embarrassing pleas – at least one good thing does spring out of it. Because – do you want to have him where other girls writhed and squirmed?
No.
But he’s also the only one with protection. And you try not to think too hard about the fact that his pack of condoms looks painfully half-empty when he takes it out of the drawer next to the bed. How light it looks, how clearly it suggests Jungkook’s silent escapades.
Or not so silent. You don’t know.
But it’s okay. This is not the moment to suffocate in envy – not with his starry eyes throwing wordless, decade-old confession at you anyway.
So you rush to your room, giggling as you shut the door; unaware of what has tickled your witty bones enough to pull out your teenage souls. Jungkook throws the condoms on your bed before his fingers proceed their journey along your body.
And when he starts lifting your soaked dress, you remind him, “You wanted to shower.”
“Yeah… And?”
“Are you not gonna?”
“Of course I will,” he argues, leaning to the shell of your ear, his lips dangerously close to your skin, “you wanna taste ocean water on me when I fuck seven years of frustration into you?”
And. 
That’s it.
Your guts twirl. Fuck. He can’t talk to you like that; not unprovoked, without a warning, risking a full outage of your already blanking brain.
“God, I— okay…” you murmur, “go and hurry then.”
“Oh, you’re,” his hand wanders under your dress, his nails trailing along your ass, “you’re coming with me.”
Oh.
Oh god. Oh fuck.
You might suffocate tonight; drop unconscious with his grip around your lungs. He’s emptying them of oxygen, like a creature who lures you into its lair to ruin you.
The cold catches up to you when he pulls you to the bathroom and the dress over your head; your skin seeks warmth, covered in little goosebumps. Hurried, you attempt to lift his shirt, but your hands are trembling. Considering that, besides your damp body, nervosity is chilling your bones too, your fingers are ratting you out unabashed.
Jungkook hides his amusement behind pressed lips, and pushes your hands away slowly. He rips the shirt off his body within one tick of the clock, regards your leftover clothes for a moment, and then…
“Love that bra,” he states. “Red and black are my favourite colours.”
You laugh, suddenly self-aware – but somehow still confident enough to throw back, “I think you’d like it better on the ground.”
“You know…” he begins, hands brushing your waist and up your back; he distracts you with soft kisses along your neck and shoulder, mumbling in between, “this might be the most film-y line I’ve ever heard from you, but… I don’t disagree.”
Nimble fingers unclasp your bra smoothly, pulling the straps down; and once he’s thrown it into whatever corner, he steps back and… looks at you. Just looks at you – wordlessly and silently, barring the sharp hisses.
His tongue darts out to glide along his lower lip, misty eyes frozen on your body and his breaths heavy as he says, “Woah.” He waits. Then, “Damn. This is… damn.”
Self-conscious… you might dissolve under his attentive leer.
“Are you gonna say… more than that?” you ask, hands lifting to cover at least your perked nipples.
But his arm shoots forwards immediately, and he pushes down your limbs. A baffled shake of his head accompanies his words as he admits, “You’re so much hotter than imagined.”
To hear Jungkook say that to you…
“Would love to know what you imagined,” you challenge and step closer, crossing your legs to provide some friction. Your lower parts are already acting up.
“Fuck princess, if I told you now,” he breathes against your skin, closing the distance; a hand wraps around one of your tits and pushes it up a little, “we’d still be here tomorrow.”
Princess… it’s been a long time since you heard this. But back then, he used it in a taunting manner, to rile you up when you didn’t get what you wanted. So you tell him, “I’m not a little princess anymore.”
“For me, you always will be…” he defends. He tugs at your panties, pushing them down your ass, and digs his fingers into your flesh. “You always will be.”
Your body burns against his, the cold long forgotten – the bulge further down grows, hardening against you. And his voice… if you weren’t turned on already, then his lustful voice is throwing you off guard now once and for all.
Impatient, he pulls down and kicks off his boxers, leaving you no time to explore before he opens the door of the shower behind you and urges you to walk backwards. You’re skin to skin; you don’t get to look down just yet, but judging from the length poking your flesh…
You’re screwed.
Literally.
Jungkook closes the door without looking back, and presses you against the cold tiles of the wall. The change in temperatures doesn’t give you as much whiplash as the alternation between his words and his gentle smile. Because when he turns on the frigid water, you gasp and inhale – and enjoying your misery, he laughs.
You push against his chest, but he tows your body in, skipping the innocent state before he starts kissing you feverishly. It might be the heaviest make out session yet – intense and maddening, his tongue tasting yours.
One hand holds your waist, but the other plants against the tiles, close to your head. You don’t know why, but the mental picture of him doing that, wet bicep hard and firm caging you half in is unbelievably hot to you.
Your palm moves over and down his torso, feeling the ridges of his abs – and you only stop when your fingers touch his semi-erect cock. His body reacts immediately – rolls into you, his breaths suddenly stagnating.
And he breaks the kiss to whisper a single, quiet, “Shit.”
“Is it shit?” you joke, the tip of your tongue poking a corner of your lips.
“As… as if. It’s the best. The hottest… oh, fuck.”
You start pumping slowly, and his forehead falls against your shoulder. Hair strands tickle your neck as you twist your hand, falling into a harder rhythm, rolling your thumb over the slit of his head. Collecting the precum, you bring it to your mouth and suck.
“Oh, holy shit,” he murmurs and lifts his head again, unable to look away from your mouth – and you enjoy the reactions, push back his wet hair with your free hand before you resume your prior actions.
You move your hand up and down until you think he’s fully hard – it didn’t take long, now that you think about it. You initiate the next step, and start moving your body down.
“What… are you really…?” Jungkook asks, his words as broken and puzzled as his voice.
“Yeah. Of course I am,” you say from below, already kneeling on the hard ground. “I might die if I don’t.”
You know that if he was anyhow able to, he’d pull a rug under your knees as you deserve – acts of service were always his love language. But unable in this setting, all he settles on instead is, “Been thinking the same thing,” he clutches your tits, then lets go, watches it bounce, “about that cunt of yours.”
You smirk; your eyes shifting to his dick.
It’s glorious. Big, veiny, gorgeous. Mouth-watering and inviting, taken care of, adorned with throbbing veins, an angry head that demands your attention.
You’re light-headed.
Tongue poking out, you roll it around his tip. He’s already reacting above you, both palms against the wall now, and looks down at you – watches you. You keep eye contact for a second; then, you take him in fully, or – in view of his size – as much as your throat allows.
You start sucking slowly, irritated by the water showering down, but determined to keep going like a pro. Too many years have you waited to let this chance pass now; or worse, fulfil the task miserably.
Hands wrap around where your mouth can’t reach, and you produce extra saliva, showing him what you’re doing when you back away just briefly. And when he sees the string of spit connecting your mouth and his tip before the shower eliminates it again, he states, “Didn’t think I’d ever die receiving a blowjob, but you might kill me tonight.”
You might. You truly might.
The curve of your ass from his point of view… the smirk you flash upon his words… the urge to grip your hair, throw your head back and cover your skin in teeth marks… you’re…
You lick along a vein. A hand envelopes his balls. You play with them, drive him crazy; his cock hardens impossibly before he reaches the peak on the mountain of insanity and blurts, “‘Kay, fuck… stop.”
“But—”
“If you don’t, I’ll come in your mouth.”
And? You don’t see the problem. So you urge, “Do it.”
“No.” Strong hands wrap around your arms and pull you up, fingers pressing into your cheeks. “Wanna stain other parts of your body. Okay?” 
You don’t speak. Don’t ask.
You don’t want the spoiler – you want him to say it when the moment comes. So you let him turn off the water; let him dry you both off; listen to him closely as he praises your body with every passing moment.
He says, “It’s hard to look at you.”
“Then… don’t.”
He knows that you know he’s unable to look away… you’re a teasing vixen even after all this time.
“I… with what you did in there,” he begins, placing the towel next to the washbasin, “I don’t wanna know how much practice you had.”
“Why?”
“Why? Because you suck dick like…” He puffs out a breath, his eyes wide; he looks like he experienced a cataclysmic event. “No further comment.”
With your grins frozen in place, you slip into the main room, and you fall onto your bed, shifting back, looking at his astonishing body as he inches closer. He bites his lip, glances down at you like a hunter, a muscular body towering over you.
And you wait like the prey as he climbs onto the bed; his thighs look wildly firm and hard, and you imagine… imagine what it’d be like to grind on them. But he distracts you, pulls your eyes back to his as he says, “God, baby, I’m… genuinely glad I brought the whole pack of condoms.”
He’s unhinged… so out of his mind. But so are you.
“Me too… honestly…”
“You’re so beautiful, I…” Jungkook is spiralling. Can’t believe what he’s seeing – that he’s seeing it at all. He’s so out of words that you laugh – and then, he chuckles with you. “No, I’m serious. I can’t think straight right now.”
“Come on,” you tell him, stretching your arms to invite him into your embrace.
And he does fall into you – just differently than you imagined. Because he doesn’t let you pull him close, doesn’t come in to kiss you. Instead, he starts wandering down, a hand under your breasts. Kisses your tummy, then your pelvis, flicks your clit with just the tip of his tongue.
He pries your legs open… places one on his shoulder, loving the sudden moan you let out, and says, “I’m sorry, I… gotta do this first. Or,” he waits… then echoes your little shower thought, “I might die.”
You giggle, but you stop immediately once he dives in. “No apologies… needed.”
“Good,” he murmurs, his breath fanning your pussy. Two fingers part your folds, and his tongue licks a wet line between them.
Mewling, you grab the hand that holds your leg. The fingers of his free hand circle around your entrance as he eats you out like a starved man right from the start, tasting you thoroughly. Drying you up as he closes his lips around your sex.
He hums into it, breaths through his nose, and the warmth of it tickles your nub. You help him out by opening your legs further, throw your head to the side, eyes closed.
In all honesty – you can’t believe it. You can’t believe eating out can feel like that… so – so extraordinarily good.
Jungkook’s lips pull at one of your folds, and he comes up to look at you for a second. Delighted when he sees your mouth agape, your hair covering half your cheek, and hears your little inhales.
You lose your mind – no, you throw it into the ocean purposely when he pushes two fingers inside. They start pumping at a delicate pace; not slow, not fast, just right, curling them against the rough spot of your walls. Like he’s trying his best to take care of you the way he always loved to.
No… not like.
He is. He is taking you with utmost care… if the moment wasn’t lewd as all hell, you might shed a tear.
“Feels so good, Kook,” you whisper, reassuring him, letting him know; his name dies on your tongue, conveying your emotions and pleasure, “so good.”
“Yeah? Do you like that?” He doesn’t await your answer; instead, he asks, “How about this?”
His adamant tongue comes back to tear you off the ground and let you float; because when it begins drawing patterns around your tingling clit, you exclaim, “Fuck yeah, yeah, I like that, too, don’t… just don’t stop.”
This is gonna be the biggest orgasm of your life – you already feel it.
And you’re right.
Because as he laps up your juices, fingers drenched in your arousal, you think you might crumble. And when he pulls them out to slap them against your bundle of nerves lightly, repeatedly, something inside you breaks – and it breaks hard.
He lifts his face, and you drench the bed; for a moment, you fear you might have soaked him all in, but he’s looking at you, pride in his smirk clear. And his fingers… fully glinting – dripping from your squirt.
Pressing a wet kiss on your pelvis, Jungkook gives you a minute to calm down; softly pecking your thighs, waist and tummy. Then, he rises, and you look at him with shaky legs; at his already sweaty form kneeling tall above you.
His lips are shiny from your arousal, smiling at you. And then… and then…
The back of his hand lifts to his mouth as if in slow-motion; and when it wipes your orgasm off his mouth with undying hunger in his hooded eyes, parts of you disintegrate. Fuck… fuck, fuck… too much.
“You fucking demon,” is all you say – and you think he knows why.
And as if to fuel the fire, he doesn’t only lick his lips clean and brush his thumb over the corner of his mouth. No – he also proceeds to bring both his hands to his head, brushing back his wet hair, baring his forehead.
A hair strand still falls back into his face and you… you think that’s it for you. 
“I need you,” you tell him from below, “lemme… please ride you.” He looks at you with a telling smile; cocks an eyebrow in temptation. “Wanna ride you.”
“Oh?” Jungkook challenges. “Can you even get up, baby?”
“You bet I can.”
Well… or at least you try. You really do.
You lift to your knees, but your body is swaying, still high from the explosion your body’s still recovering from. And Jungkook – he doesn’t lay down. He seats himself against the headboard of the bed, beckons you to him with a finger, and you crawl closer slowly.
You straddle him with quivering limbs, rubbing your pussy against the twitching cock laying angry and awaiting on his stomach. He wants to fuck you so bad – you can tell without gazing into his eyes.
But then, you do eventually – bewildered by the sudden irritation in his voice as he says, “Stop it… enough.”
Fire boiling his blood, his veined hand grips the pack of condoms, pushing you off his cock and back onto his legs before he takes out the rubber hastily. You worry your lips, hoping his aggression doesn’t rip the material.
But he envelopes his cock with utmost care, a hand falling to your thighs before he says, “Okay then… pretty girl.”
Fingers covered in tattoos hold his cock upright, and you lift your body, moving your hips enticingly on purpose before you let yourself down on him slowly. Sitting on the throne you ached to claim for so long, feeling full, so stuffed to the brim.
“How do… how do you feel?” Jungkook asks, out of breath already.
“Good, Kook… really fucking good.”
“Yeah?” He wraps his arms around your torso and pulls you closer to him. You hold his face, look down at him, starting to move; watch him press his lips together as he gives back, “You feel… so amazing, too.”
“Do I?”
“Can’t get enough of you – goddamn, you’re so pretty.”
“And you…”
Your eyes roll back as you move up and down on him, hot and bothered despite the intruding condom prohibiting direct touch. You lean in, your foreheads touching, tits pressed against his chest. When you look at him for a moment, you realise that he closed his eyes, too, and he’s groaning, tilting his head, moving to kiss your jaw and your neck…
Intimacy with the man you’ve been in love with for so long feels different than you imagined. A lot rawer, and a whole lot more ardent. If your painfully human body didn’t store a specific amount of stamina, you’d be ready to do this for the rest of your life.
Jungkook bites into your flesh lightly, then soothes the ache with an open mouthed kiss. And when he holds you close, drowning in you as you let his cock set every spot of your walls alight, you realise…
Jungkook and you aren’t just fucking. And he’s not just indulging in the general feeling sex consists of. He’s adoring you. Making love to you, worshipping every piece of your skin as he thinks you deserve.
Always, always set out to make you feel good… happy.
You’re ready to melt into him. Ready to perish in his arms.
“Are you getting tired?” he asks, pounding up into you once.
The curve of his cock hits you just right – and you’re still so wet that the sounds of your sexes colliding echo off the walls in an utterly crude manner. You don’t want to stop. Want him to keep holding your head, fingers in your tresses, kissing your face.
His digits move to your ass, and he squeezes hard, eliciting a gasp out of you before you give in and say, “A little. But don’t wanna stop.”
“Stop?” he asks, his voice unbelieving. Who told you to stop? it says. And then, his statement confirms, “I’ve a better idea.”
And then, suddenly, he’s flipping you over. Onto your back, still buried balls deep inside you.
He doesn’t move yet; stays like that for a moment. Because you’re breathing hard, and you need to catch air as you plead, “Just a second, okay?”
“Anything,” Jungkook says, kissing your cheek, “anything for you.”
And then, you stare at each other. He brushes your face with the back of his hand, lost in the labyrinth inside your eyes. Smiles lovingly, shifting; with his body, his cock inside you shifts too, and you whimper.
“I’ve been wanting to do this,” he tells you,” for such a long time.”
“Me too.”
“But… it exceeds my expectations.”
“I’m glad… I’m…”
“I’ve always been in love with you,” he interrupts. Stops your heartbeat, sends a spark of electricity through your blood vessels. His pupils flicker, jabbing your soul deep behind your eyes. “You know that, right?”
Somewhere, you hoped for it. And somewhere, you might have known. 
You smile gently, tell him, “Now I do for sure.”
“Good,” he whispers, moving a bit again, “good.”
And like that, silently, you become one.
Constantly moaning in unison, your legs around his waist, breaths synchronised. Wrapped around each other, tasting the other. His lips remain on yours, and his hand holds your face by your jaw. His focus at kissing keeps breaking once you whine out a particularly alluring sound.
His fingers roam your body; then, his arms hold you desperately close, never letting you go. And he looks at you with immutable fondness. Wanders down to explore your body; sucks your tits, kisses your cleavage, bites your hard nubs lightly.
The room is hot, but you’re shivering – still confused about the temperature inside and around you.
And once your fingers edge to your clit, fighting their way between your bodies, you finally let go.
And fuck… he loves seeing you let go. He’s been to this island a dozen times; has seen hidden and picture-perfect spots of this place. But…
You, like this, might be the most beautiful sight he’s ever witnessed.
You’re enough to push him closer to the edge – and this time, the cliff is higher than the one you saw yesterday.
“I’m gonna come too, baby…” he warns, and you nod.
“Do it.”
“I wanna…” he says, but then stops for a moment to hold himself back just a bit longer. “I don’t know if you’ll let me if I ask, but…”
You lick your lips, a hand behind his ear, and whisper, “What is it?”
“I… I wanna come…” he begins, hesitating, worried crinkles around his bambi eyes, “on your ass.”
His face is sweaty, suggesting sins, ones the both of you undoubtedly gave into. But his orbs �� they’re shiny. Sweet and loving, big and home to a galaxy. The opposite of the unholy demand he just uttered.
So you laugh a little, endeared and in love, and assure him, “Could never say no to you, baby.”
And so, he’s fast to pull out and help you turn around; he lifts your hips and your ass, a hand pushing down your upper body. With your cheeks against the cold pillow, he enters you again, fucking into you more roughly this time.
His palms keep you down, even if you attempt to lift your body, and you clutch the sheets, muffled screams sounding against your pillow. Softness vanishes, and he jackhammers into you, hard and fast, without remorse.
Your whining and crying out increases when he leans down to kiss your back, to graze your shoulder blades, groaning before he speaks into your ear, “You’re a fucking dream.”
And he’s a damn beast.
You can barely breathe, hypnotised by the pounds of his cock, penetrating your every nerve. Rubbing against your clenching walls; his shaft is big and thick enough for your pussy to appear dizzyingly tight to him.
With a grunt, he pulls out, a hand slapping down to your ass and kneading hard while his unoccupied fingers rip off the condom. Pumping until hot liquid shoots onto the small of your back and your ass.
You crane your neck and look back as much as possible, hearing the coarse curses and fucked out groans that fall off his tongue. And god, the expression he wears… the bite of his lip, the shut eyes, the clipped vocals.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
Your pussy pulsates, uncaring that you came twice already. Burning up, you inch closer when he plumps into the mattress next to you, onto his back and with an arm draped over his eyes. Exhausted, he says, “Shit, I’m dizzy.”
“Same here,” you admit, and he looks at you, smiling.
“That was… madness.”
Jungkook leans into you and reaches out, tucking back your hair. He watches you still laying on your stomach – you don’t dare to turn around just yet. But you look at him, fingers slithering to his face, and you touch his cheekbones feather-lightly as you confess, “I want you. So bad.”
There’s no filth in your words – he knows. Sees it in your damp eyes.
“You have me,” he vows, gripping your hand to bring it to his lips. He kisses each and every of your knuckles, and his eyelashes brush his cheeks as he sighs, “You have me now, and I promise I’ll stay this time.”
Shifting even closer, you bury your head in his neck, in his comfort. “You need to. I can’t take the same thing all over again.”
“You won’t. We won’t, okay?”
It’s the last thing he says before he rises. You think he might want to distract himself from the pain he suffered all those years, gone from your body, ache catching up to him. But what you don’t know is that he wants you closer, so much closer.
All night long.
So he cleans you up with a wet cloth and a dry towel; treats you with caution, like a glass doll. A contrast to the way he battered your body a few moments ago.
You tell him, “Thank you.”
And he says, “You don’t need to thank me for that. It should be a given.”
You realise… you’ve never felt what you feel for him.
Jungkook grabs his boxers and brings you fresh underwear and a loose, oversized shirt from the open suitcase you tossed under the window. Then, he tucks you both in. Lays his head on your chest, one arm wrapped tight around you.
You play with his slowly drying hair, your lips buried in them, hold him tight as if he could vanish if you let go. Gazing at the sky above the ocean, your breaths steady, and you think he’s asleep before he suddenly moves a little.
He kisses your chest, sighs against your shirt; doesn’t say much except, “I’m so crazy for you. Always have been.”
And then slowly, surely, softly… you drift off.
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When you were ten, you insisted on tagging along with Jungkook’s family when you arrived at the city nearest to the island. You said his car was better climatised and that they played better music – but in truth, you didn’t listen to the radio too closely.
And because of that, even his brother gave up his seat for you and kept Seokjin company in his parents’ car.
On the way home, you fought and played with Jungkook for hours. He’d doze off sometimes, but when he woke, he’d resume your conversations as though nothing had happened. And he’d remember, too.
Halfway through, you passed your time discussing your new schools. How you’d behave, what clothes you’d wear, what you’d do to impress your teachers. You told each other that you’d study hard this time, and then exchange information on how well you were doing at the next gathering or birthday party.
Your parents were as close to each other as you and Jungkook. You’d meet him sooner than you expected – you knew. It filled your chest with warmth every time, anticipating the pleasant days in your or his garden.
“I got a new backpack before we came here,” you told him, your chest swelling up in pride.
You formed a box with your hands, a big one at that, and added cheerfully, “It’s this large. And green. White, too. Next time you come over, I’ll show you, okay?”
“Yeah!” he responded, nodding wildly, almost as energetic as you. Somehow, you always found the most power to wade through the day when you left the island. “And I’ll show you my new pencil case.”
“Okay. But it can’t be cooler than my bag.”
“I know.”
Jungkook was honest – he didn’t compete with you if he didn’t have to. Didn’t dwell in stupid arguments just for the sake of it. Even as a kid, he knew how to take defeat, and compared to other children you knew, it surprised you each time.
“I’m kinda glad we’re going back,” he said, tugging at his safety belt, “but also not.”
From the front, his parents chuckled, and the both of you, delighted by the adults’ joy, giggled with them. Jungkook pressed his back further into his seat, lifting his legs a little as he explained, “Wanna know what middle school’s like. But I also miss our island a lot when we leave.”
“Same!” you told him, nodding along. “It’s like a dream sometimes.”
“Right? Right?!”
“But we’ll come back next year,” you said, leaning forward to tap at his mother’s shoulder, “we will, yes?”
She moved her head sideways, and you could only admire her side profile as she answered, “Yeah, if you guys want to!”
“Yes, of course we do!” the both of you yelled back, your words overlapping, chaos breaking out.
Thinking back to memories you shared throughout a decade, you couldn’t dream of getting bored of the island. It was like a second home, and the crisp air, the salt water and the sand like a second skin.
Your travels home were an exciting part of those summers – but at some point, they started becoming a reminder that real life existed.
When you’d have to go back to school and exams, homework and unnecessary middle and high school drama. When you wouldn’t see Jungkook every single day anymore, right when you got used to his presence. You’d realise that you’d wake up early again, pack your bag, and wait for the school year to end.
Peeling off this second skin before autumn broke in felt more bittersweet, the more you grew up.
Strangely, this time it doesn’t.
You open your eyes. The city, crowded and bustling, feels different than your beach and endless sea.
Rubbing your stiff neck, you stand from your seat, flashing the bus driver a smile before you exit the vehicle. You have a perfectly fine hybrid car, but considering the fact that your destination lies merely a stone’s throw from your apartment, you decided to take the bus instead.
And perhaps you would’ve walked to the café, if your nervous heart hadn’t kept you locked between your walls for a good ten minutes.
Jungkook and you parted with the promise to meet again this time; to bring back the days you lost and live through them correctly once you came back.
You shared the vow when sunlight broke through the window – his arms still held you close, his breathing steady against your chest. His eyes opened with a flutter, like a butterfly’s wing, and when it was light enough in the room to see dust particles float through the air, he said it.
“Stay this time. Just like this… stay with me this time, okay?”
You’ve never declined the soft pleas written in his big eyes. No matter how much you used to banter, you always fulfilled the other’s wishes in a heartbeat.
Jungkook’s flight was two days before yours. Since then, two weeks have passed, and for the first time since you arrived in your city, the both of you have found a day in your tight schedule to rekindle whatever you missed out on.
And now, here he is.
Standing right in front of the coffeeshop, hands in his dark grey military shorts. Still not the biggest fan of denim, you assume. Looking at him, he doesn’t compare to the office workers you see every morning on the way to your job.
He always cherished the lax part of his closet the most; and it’s clear that this still hasn’t changed.
The loose dark shirt sways in the wind, and his eyes, big and wide, search the crowd for you. His hair hangs into his eyes, and his large, tattooed hand brushes them away – and when you step closer from the other side of the street, he finally sees you.
His entire face lights up. Like a light bulb. Like a star.
He sports a white smile, waves at you, lets his chest rise for a long time until it falls again. You angle your head and lift a hand to wave back, halting in front of his body and only then greeting, “Hey.”
“Hey…” Jungkook’s eyes take in your full appearance, never lingering on one spot until he reaches your smile. “You look… gorgeous.”
You’re nervous – gosh, you can hear your heart everywhere. In your throat, in your head, in your guts. Anywhere but in your chest, because he swirls your insides and your thoughts.
“You do, too,” you give back, swallowing. You look past him and into the café and add, “Wanna go in?”
“Oh, yeah. Yeah, let’s.”
The journey from the pavement to the inside of the café, and then from the entrance to the booth feels endless. Because you’re spiralling with him around. His scent, sweet and dazzling, wafts through the air, overshadowing the smell of coffee and desserts.
You don’t know how you make it to your seat in one piece; still don’t understand why his effect on you is so powerful. It’s worse than it was on the island – which is strange, considering that your skin collided for an entire night and more.
Small talk passes cursorily.
He asks, “Did you find your way here okay?”
You, settling next to him in the booth, tell him, “Oh yeah. I used Google Maps and all. Found out it’s super close to my place.”
And he, taking your hand in his wordlessly, responds, “Perfect.”
And that’s where the initial, obligatory questions end and the sickening, sweet emotions erupt.
Because he squeezes your palm in his. Watches how your fingers wrap around his hand before his gaze lifts to meet yours. He brushes your hair back with his free fingers, drops his pupils to your still, coloured lips.
You stare at the mole on his neck, and he lifts your chin, pulls your face closer to his. And then… and then he leans in timidly, pressing his mouth on yours. Closing your eyes, you breathe in deeply, moving your lips against his, kissing him back as though you’ve known the feeling all your life. But then again… you have remembered it all your life.
And you don’t release the exhale until he backs away.
The smiles and tiny laughs that fall out of both of you were long overdue. Unconditional happiness floats between you; never faltering when you come down from heaven and land back on the ground.
You skim the menu together. His pinky finger holds yours like he’s giving you silent promises, and you snicker about his stupid work jokes before he interrupts you with the call of your name.
“Yeah?” you voice.
You blink and smile softly at him, and for a moment, he forgets what he was about to say. But then, he collects the remnants of his consciousness and tells you, “Close your eyes. Please?”
“What’s that about?” you ask, but listen to his friendly command anyway.
You’re bad with surprises that involve closed eyes – you want to speak and ask questions, peek at what he’s doing, your eyelids flickering in tiny motions and urging you to slip them open.
But you don’t; you wait for his plan to unfold.
And then… you feel it. The soft plushness pressing against your cheek. Just for a tiny moment, a light peck that could definitely pass as an illusion.
“You—” you start, but then fall silent again – because that’s not all.
His fingers open your clenched fist, straighten your palm and then place something cold onto your skin. You hear him suck in a breath, and he clears his throat before he says, “Okay. You can look.”
So you do.
But no one warned you of the sudden burst of emotions you’d feel. The imploding of your heart, the parting of your lips.
Three little stars… like a sparkle. Much like the emoji you love to use; a pendant on a golden chain that sways like a pendulum when you lift it to your face.
A sparkle.
A piece of the night sky.
“Do you like it?” Jungkook asks, more nervous than you could’ve ever been an hour ago. “I, uh… You need to speak, baby—”
“Where…” you begin, blinking away the dampness in your eyes before you look at him. “Where did you get this?”
“Do you remember that little market over there?”
You do. It was tiny. A small part of the island, but it had most of the daily things you needed for basic survival.
“Seokjin and I went there once and there was this lady who sold old pendants. She said she made them herself, and… and there was this… this one,” he explains; fingertips touch the little stars, “and it made me think of you. So I got it for you.”
You trap your lips between your teeth, keeping your chin from quivering as you listen on, “When we came back, I asked a jeweller to clean it up for me. Bought a golden chain to go with it and then wanted to give it to you. I even had it all planned out. Like, I wanted you to close your eyes, and then place it around your neck. I was gonna kiss you and—”
Jungkook silences, pressing his lips together – the past is gone. And dwelling doesn’t do it anymore; so he breaks his sentence and starts instead, “But then—”
Then you parted. And yours as well as his life went on.
“Yeah… I know,” you whisper, sniffling. You’re proud of yourself – your cheeks are still dry. “Why did you do all that for me?”
Jungkook clutches your hand again and pulls it to his thigh, tugging you close softly. A searing ball of warmth spreads in your chest, drying up your throat, and he cradles your face – dives into your stare.
"I told you, I… I was in love with you. So insanely in love, but I was a coward, too," he admits, and the L-word strikes you like lightning, "but I want you to have it now, because we're here and I just. I'm still in love with you. So much it hurts."
You don't need to say it back – he knows it already. He sees the gently blooming love in the glitter of your eyes. Knows that, judging by the soft smile and the bedazzlement in your expressions, you'll never feel less than he does. After so much time, you're still here, and…
You don't need to say it back.
So instead of waiting for your confession, he opens the hand holding the necklace; you didn't know you closed your fist around it again. He opens the chain, and you turn around, letting him close the jewellery around your neck.
Everything about this moment feels like the adult version of the pearl and tide pool incident. The waterlife… the scolding… the white twinkle on a leaf – not in a clam. Like the dozen gifts that’d put a smile on your face as a kid, he’s brought you another shining piece of his heart.
He keeps your smile stuck in place and you floating high above clouds.
His fingers brush your shoulders, and he pulls you close, silently reminiscing about what was and what will be as he asks, "It's fitting right? The pendant."
You understand immediately what he's trying to say. Your fingertips touch the stars between your clavicles, keeping the little object as close to your heart as possible.
And then, you think: no matter how tender the gesture is, and how much it grips your heart – perhaps it might even be enough if you could keep staring into the glimmer of his eyes.
The milky way shimmers harder in them, even during the bright and sunny day; more than the night sky with its million scattered stars over the ocean ever could. 
And you also think that… if Jungkook stays with you this time… if he keeps looking at you like that…
You’ll never have to swim to the horizon to keep the stars close.
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so... i wrote bits of it when i was sick with the ‘rona, so some parts might not be perfect – but i fell in love with this couple a lot 🥺 thank you all for hyping me up during the teaser release and even before that – it meant a lot !! AND thank you for reading the finished product <3
if you enjoyed this little trip, do let me know what you think !! feedback is always appreciated, so i’d be over the moon if you liked, commented, sent a message and/or reblogged (with or without your thoughts) !! looking forward to hear what y’all think !! <33
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jimilter · a month ago
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disaster management | j.jk. | one-shot (m)
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An important investor wants to withdraw from a future project at Jeon Security, and you, the company's President, are to handle things before they blow over. A task that would have been easy despite the meeting’s location being the investor’s daughter’s wedding. Only – the presence of your unruly CEO, Jeon Jungkook, by your side the entire night when paired with alcohol… may lead to way bigger disasters than what the two of you can manage.
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pairing: jungkook x reader rating: m (18+) genre: humor | smut | chaebol!au | enemies to lovers!au | ceo!jungkook warnings: swearing + alcohol consumption + sexual tension + reckless decisions under the influence (they're both consenting, just cowards that are helped along by lowered inhibitions) + descriptive making out (ik it sounds weird but i wrote like 1k words of two mouths eating each other, okay?) + neverending banter, they don't even shut up during sex stg + explicit sexual situations (breast play, oral (m), grinding, vaginal fingering, rough sex, penetrative sex, dirty talk, marking, dom!jungkook, switch!reader, jungkook is a Boob Guy™ but he grabs her ass a lot too, strength kink, manhandling, so much teasing, edging, orgasm denial, overstimulation, forced orgasm, cervix penetration, restraints, monopoly on begging, actual begging, a couple of spanks here and there) + semi-public sex + some computer science stuff i made up that may or may not be stupid + life is lonely in chaebol families + reader feels very done with all the fakeu cakeu world + living out lorde’s royals is her dream now <3 word count: 17 k note: she is finally done after two months, she’s double the intended word count and she’s filthier than expected. no really, more than half of this is just smut, i am so sorry 😔✋ this can be read as a standalone, but it comes third in the k&d series’ chronology so reading at least one of the earlier drabbles will definitely be of help!
dedicated ⇝ to @ahundredtimesover​​, mimi the loveliest whose kind words of appreciation for hese characters and this universe have motivated me a lot while writing this! i love you so much, babe. 🥺💖
hope y’all enjoy our most chaotic duo finally resolving some tension between them~ 😩💜
— masterlist | feedback!
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↝ the damsel & her knight ⁘ 01 02 [03] 04
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You don’t like the direction this meeting has taken.
Well, you didn’t like the fact that the company’s Chairman’s wife and your mother decided to visit the head office together, today, in the first place. And then you also didn’t appreciate being asked to make time for this formal-informal chat with the two women. But what you especially detest is Jungkook’s name sliding into this conversion that you thought would only include the responsibilities you were to shoulder at Yoongi’s wedding – both, as the company's President and as the Chairman's best friend's daughter. 
Goddamn it, when will this friendship ever benefit you in any way?
"And so, a member of the Jeon family being in attendance will emphasize our support to Yoongi and make him feel good on his big day, while at the same time, you can present Mister Lim with the updated contract and mend things about Lim Enterprises' interest in your project."
You stare at Mrs. Jeon in confusion. She wants you to talk about the Lims’ investment into Jeon Security’s upcoming project discussed during their daughter's wedding? Her wedding to Jeon Security’s Creative Director? 
Oh.
Of course she does.
Because this wedding is, obviously, happening due to the partnership. 
And you thought Min Yoongi and Lim Nari were in love. Damn, one can never really tell with these rich people, huh? Thank God you never let your mother mold you this way and chose to run away to college immediately after boarding school. She would've turned you into a walking mannequin, like every other girl caught in this social circle is.
Speaking of, the woman who birthed you sits next to Mrs Jeon with a pleased smile, completely in tune with everything being said. It wasn’t even an hour ago when she was lecturing you on how you need to find someone “handsome and suitable” to settle down with, soon, the way Yoongi and Nari have found each other. And now here she is, obviously well aware of the contractual nature of the relationship she was singing praises for. What a woman. How is she your mother?
"Isn't this wedding a bit… too convenient for the company?" you mumble, disgruntled and irritated.
Your mother simply shrugs. "Nothing is ever too convenient in the world of business, baby. You should know that by now."
Right. Yes, you do know that. It just feels – well. It feels disappointing and disheartening that Yoongi's blooming relationship with Nari that you'd all been witnessing for the past couple of months is actually a farce concocted for the company's benefit. Because secretly, what your mom said to you today had been on your mind for a while, too. Some part of you was thinking about how there was still hope for people even in your kind of social circles – hope of someday finding love and happiness. But apparently, even someone as carefree of his familial duties as Min Yoongi can be bound in contracts when need be.
Damn. You all really do live pretty sad lives. Lorde's Royals makes so much more sense now.
"I know that, mom. I just wasn't aware this is a contract wedding," you confess, turning your pout towards Mrs Jeon.
"Oh, no no! No, nothing of the sort! Yoongi and Nari truly love each other!" Mrs. Jeon corrects you with abject horror on her face – and then immediately gives a fond sigh, as if envisioning the said love. Your eyebrows crumple,  leaking the beginning of a scowl; she's a terrible liar. "It was just very lucky that Nari is the Lims' younger daughter."
Lucky. Right. You don't buy that for a second, but you still nod at the Chairman's wife because what else are you supposed to do in front of her? Then you sigh and massage your forehead to focus on the current problem on hand.
"But why do both Jungkook and I have to go?" you protest, this time looking straight at your mother. "I can have the meeting and extend Yoongi congratulations on the company's behalf, by myself."
"Oh, we know you can, honey, but you shouldn't. We cannot let poor Yoongi believe that your attendance is just for business." Your mother raises her eyebrows meaningfully. "He is a valuable member of the company’s family – he must know that the Jeon family supports him on his big day." 
"Which my son's presence there will ensure," Mrs Jeon adds with a smile, and you barely hold back an immediate grimace.
"Alright, so then why can he not give the presentation after he's done…" You purse your lips in distaste, "supporting Yoongi?"
This integrated Firewall-VPN software project is your baby and you won’t trust anyone else in the world with it. But you still throw that proposition out there because for reasons you’d rather not explore, you don’t wanna spend an entire day by Jungkook’s side. 
"You know as well as I do that Jungkook is only smart enough with a computer and not people." Mrs Jeon gives a wary sigh. "He will mess this up if we leave it to him."
For some reason, it doesn't sit right with you that Jungkook's own mother has such a low opinion of him. Granted, the guy does cause more problems than he is capable of resolving, but that is mostly because his dad picked him off a desk job and gave him an Executive position. No one can deny that he’s got unbeatable computer programming skills and is more efficient at picking out coding errors than any software. It’s literally in his resume. That doesn’t quite equate with ‘smart enough with a computer.’ It's his genius.
He definitely massively lacks leadership skills and sincerity, but you've been working with him constantly to make him better at it. And he has improved a great deal from the flirtatious mess he was when his father first brought him in as the company's CEO, two years ago. 
Case in point, Jungkook is still more than competent to give a flawless presentation on your project to secure the contract because he understands it. You know it.
You clear your throat, knowing better than to challenge the Chairman's wife, family friend or not. But you do give a weary sigh.
"So I'm going as his babysitter?"
Your mother chuckles, rolling her eyes. "No, honey. You're going as his date."
And there it is – the inevitable doom you knew you were headed towards, the moment Mrs Jeon started talking about her son. To be very honest, you have been fearing this for months now.
And to be fair, it’s not even her fault. It’s you – you brought this upon yourself. You cursed yourself.
All those months ago in Vegas, it was you who stupidly thanked the universe that you weren’t being being forced to date Jungkook. You feared you would jinx yourself by thinking it up, and you did. Your thought was caught by the universe at the time, which has now finally been sent after you in the form of a curse.
Wait, what the hell are you even thinking about? And why are you not saying anything?
Shaking your head, you try to put on a neutral expression despite the horrors that swim in front of your eyes at the prospect.
"Mom, with all due respect, that sounds like a terrible idea," you eloquently counter your mother's suggestion, successfully concealing the panic that has welled up your throat. "Why can't we just – I don't know, go individually?"
Mrs Jeon titters, waving a manicured hand with zero wrinkles in front of your face. "Come on now, child. We can't make it obvious that you're there on business.  Everything has to look smooth and unplanned."
You stare at the woman. Why has she not taken the company's reins from her husband when she is so amazingly strategic and conniving with handling diplomacy? Or maybe, it actually is her that makes all the decisions and Chairman Jeon just follows her lead.
"You understand, don't you?" the woman continues with raised eyebrows that seem to say more than her mouth does.
Do you? The part about this not being a contract wedding? Not so much. But the part explaining why Jungkook going there along with you will display familial support better? Yeah, you kinda do.
What you absolutely don't get is why you have to go as dates and not colleagues. What will the Lims care if you both go there separately? You doubt Yoongi will have enough time on his hands to even pay attention to all his guests, let alone be bothered by business discussions happening in some corner of the wedding reception. 
So then, what good impression is going as dates to leave upon the Lims? Other than underlining the fact that the company doesn't have any anti workplace romance rules set in place, that is.
God, why is everyday so damn exhausting in this job?
Your sigh of deep, despairing grief isn't even fully released yet, when the man of the hour himself makes his boisterous entry into the room.
"Mom! And Mom!"
The scowl you had barely repressed jumps back up. How childish of you would it be to hug your mother to yourself and tell Jungkook to not call her that? Extremely. More childish than he is, which is the only reason why you refrain from doing so. 
While the guy himself drops his ass on the couch, right in the middle of the two women. "What're we discussing, ladies?"
You roll your eyes so hard, the back of your head hurts. "Your dad's decided to fire you," you tell him with a deadpan, relishing the way shock freezes his face. "I'm taking over the family business, he's made me the heir."
"Wha—I don't—he can't—can he do that? What?"
"She's joking, son, obviously!" Your mother clarifies with a worried pat on a coughing Jungkook's back.
Dressed in a white and blue striped shirt and dark pants, he looks unfairly handsome as always. When he blows out a raspberry in obvious relief from your very realistic joke, your eyes catch the lip-ring he still sports and mind inevitably travels back to Vegas.
You had come so close to kissing him back then. So close. You sat in his lap, felt those firm muscles, talked about less than appropriate stuff, and – nearly kissed those lips of his you can't look away from. God, what would have happened if you hadn't stopped when you did? What would have happened to you two? Between you two? 
The thought, decidedly inappropriate and unfit for workplace ponderings, leaves your stomach in knots. And not from disgust, but something more nerve-wracking. This can't be good. This isn't good.
Jungkook, meanwhile, has recovered from the joke and is now being filled in on the roles you both are to play three days from now. In a stark contrast to your horrified first reaction, he looks giddy at the prospect. Of course he does. You grit your teeth and look away when he waggles his eyebrows at you.
"A date, huh, Prez?" 
You breathe out through your nose, tight and restrained. "Not by choice, Jeon. Never by choice."
While your mothers look on with wide eyes, Jungkook gives a mock gasp and places a hand on his chest – the picture of scandalized. You hate him so fucking much.
"Never say never, Prez! You might end up jinxing it!"
Oh, God, you do not wanna think about jinxes. Maybe the dumbhead has a point for once in his entire brainless existence, though – you're already reaping the rewards of a jinx, you better not trigger another one and—
You bring your chain of thoughts to a screeching halt because wow, isn't this exactly what jinxing is?
"Yeah, whatever, I'm off." 
You brusquely collect your coat from the hook and bag from the table. Bowing to both your mom and Mrs Jeon separately, you lean down to press a kiss to your mother's cheek.
"I'll visit sometime this weekend, mom," you tell the woman with a terse smile. "Tell dad I'll bring him a family pack of those flavored coffee beans he's been obsessing over lately."
She laughs at that, nodding with a very fake roll of her eyes, and you wonder if anything she does has any remaining semblance of organicness at all. Probably not. She's been living this life for twice the years you have, after all.
You stalk out of the room without so much as a glance towards the CEO and of course he can't have that. Groaning when you hear rushed footsteps chasing you into the hallway, you close your eyes and shake your head.
"Not in the mood today, Jeon."
Jungkook, the irritating piece of shit he is, falls in step with you with a smirk so huge on his face that you're able to sense it in your peripheral vision. That prompts another, louder groan from you.
"Stop smirking like an annoying fucker, and leave me alone!"
"Oof, that sailor's mouth!" He gives a small whistle, sliding his hands into his pockets. "I wasn't here to bother you, by the way. For a change."
You snort. "Right."
"What? Really!" He gives a petulant whine, and when you simply keep walking without a word, he sighs. "Look. I'm not super excited about this date-thing, either, okay? I'm a bad – horrible actor, and despite whatever pull exists between us, I cannot forge fond looks and affectionate smiles when I look at you."
You are almost about to nod in agreement – hating yourself for agreeing with the asshole but also kinda relieved that you aren't the only one who hates this – when you suddenly stop. And analyze his words. And then turn to him with a gaping mouth and furrowed brow. He looks back at you innocently and you come this close to punching him in his very boopable nose.
"What the fuck do you mean by whatever pull exists between us?" you hiss at him, subconsciously backing the guy up to the glass wall next to you – one that looks down fifteen floors and gives you vertigo. You don't look away from Jungkook's wide eyes, though, half to intimidate him and half to prevent yourself from getting nauseous. "If you're under some kind of delusion that I actually—"
"I never said it was you," he calmly supplies, interrupting you with a shrug of his shoulders.
And you just gape at him some more, aghast and speechless. Because what? "Jungkook, what on fucking earth are you talking about?"
He winces, turning his face to the right, and the flash of his eyebrow piercing makes you gulp. "Has anyone ever told you you curse too much, Prez?"
"Jungkook," you growl, and the guy raises both his hands up in surrender.
"Okay, relax, I just…" He trails off, and for the first time in your life, you see Jeon Jungkook look unsure of himself. "I just meant… well. Back in Vegas, there was – there was a moment at the club, right? We were close, and—"
"Sir," you interrupt him icily, sweat breaking out on the back of your neck because he was not supposed to remember any of that, "you were really drunk that night. I'm sure whatever you think you remember is far from what actually happened."
A foreign look falls upon his face, one that you cannot exactly interpret but one that makes you want to hide away from his stare. But you don't and instead keep looking at his downturned lips and clouded eyes until they spell out disappointment. And it’s not very encouraging, but it is at least something you can read.
"Besides," you keep going with a tight smile, "it has been close to a year since Vegas. Whatever you think happened there is nothing but a misunderstanding of the distant past, I assure you."
Instant hurt flashes in his eyes, one that he is quick to hide but not quick enough – and you are somewhat ashamed of yourself for building a wall of denial between you two when he was being honest, just because you absolutely cannot get yourself to face what was about to happen in Vegas. Or nearly two years ago, in that elevator, after you saved him from drowning. 
Because Jungkook is your enemy – one that has hated your guts since you two were kids, and prompted you to return the sentiment in kind.
And so you do. Plastering a huge grin on your face, you pat his shoulder with faux tenderness. His jaw clenches and steely gaze lands on your hand.
"And I think we can do without any loving stares, Jeon. It's just a matter of a couple of hours, anyway."
With that you turn away from him and march down the lobby to the elevator, racing into the almost full cubicle, lest you be stuck in the metal box alone with Jungkook again.
As the doors slowly shut, your eyes catch Jungkook’s troubled ones one last time and different levels of your mind spin in concentric circles of confusion, until you just shut your eyes and start to plan out the details you need to change in the contract to get the Lims to agree, this time round.
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Okay, you will be honest – you didn’t expect Yoongi’s wedding would happen at an opera house, of all places. And that too in the evening. How rich are the Mins, exactly? You don’t even know what their family business is, just that Yoongi has no part in it because he has dedicated his loyalties to Jeon Security.
But as you stand on the elaborately rolled out red carpet that leads from the driveway where your limo has stopped, all the way across the stairs and up to the giant entrance to the place, you are in absolute awe. The place is beautiful. The event will surely be memorable for every attendee. If only it was actually a happy wedding and not just signing of a contract, the bride and groom would have been making happy memories as well.
Smile waning at the thought, you turn back towards the car to accept the huge bouquet the driver holds out towards you. Jungkook is meeting you here because you refused to sit with him in the closed space of a car for a two hours ride. Looking around, it doesn't take you long to spot the guy waiting near the entrance.
Partly because you've acquired a superpower of locating him in record time over months of playing babysitter to him and his immature shenanigans– but mostly because he's dressed in yellow. 
Like – top to bottom, sunflower yellow. 
The shirt beneath his yellow jacket has white stripes – because he is obsessed with stripes – but he's even got a pair of sunglasses that are as yellow as the rest of his ensemble and you are ninety percent sure every single person in the vicinity is staring at him. And not for the reasons he obviously seems to believe because he keeps grinning at the passers by and waving when they awkwardly smile.
God, the secondhand embarrassment. Ugh.
You really don't wanna accompany this humanized, inflatable, tube man that is sure to draw attention wherever he goes. Goddamn it.
His gaze lands on you within minutes of you spotting him, and he immediately jogs down the driveway to get to you. You try your hardest but cannot transform your grimace into an affectionate smile fitting for a loving girlfriend.
"Hi, babe!" greets Jungkook, snatching you by the waist into a side hug that ends with his lips on your temple.
You freeze, overwhelmed and shocked – and wondering what kind of oceanic cologne does the guy use; it's heavenly – because as much as you realize you should technically protest to his invasion of your privacy that you didn't previously agree upon, the warmth and solid feel of his body entrapping you feels far from offensive.
Which scares you. A lot.
So you grit your teeth and clench your eyes shut, hissing out, "Step away right now if you don’t want my heels lodged in your fucking knees, Jeon."
He does so, releasing a full belly laugh, but you notice the tightness around his lips and know that he’s putting on a show. Good for him. And his kneecaps.
“You look good,” he tells you with a small smile, which makes him look almost sincere. 
Almost sincere not because you don’t look good – you know you do in your knee length, off-shoulders black dress and matching pumps – but because he is Jeon Jungkook and when is he ever sincere when it comes to you? You give a small sigh and try to smile back.
“Thanks. And you look, uh… yellow.”
Jungkook’s look of pure offense is hilarious and it takes all your self-constraint to not laugh. “I’ll have you know this is all LV. Top to bottom. I did an ad campaign with them last week, and—” He cuts himself off with a huff, shaking your head when you flutter your lashes at him. “Nevermind.”
“You didn’t have to take yellow as an insult, you know,” you mumble, placing the dainty chain of your clutch over a bare shoulder.
Jungkook’s gaze follows the action, lingering a bit on your bare flesh before he meets your gaze again. Something heated reflects in his eyes, the echo of which twirls your gut. You hold back a shiver.
“Did you mean it as a compliment?” comes a mumble from the guy, amusement replacing whatever previously resided in his gaze.
You are about to retort with a did you want me to, when you realize you are treading towards flirting territory and God forbid you ever flirt with the bane of your existence. So you just smirk and let him join the dots, relishing the metaphoric smoke that exits his ears.
“That for me?” Never one to give up, Jungkook flashes you an irritating smile the next moment and points at the gigantic bouquet in your hand.
Even your deadpan doesn’t phase him; what the heck is he made of? Sighing, you roll your eyes and paste on the biggest grin you can muster on your face. “Can we just go, babe?”
Eyebrows shooting up at your greeting, Jungkook nods at you with a smirk, offering you his arm to take. 
And up the red carpet you both walk. There’s some paparazzi stationed opposite the building’s entrance as well, so you pause and pose for a second before finally entering the venue. 
The place is swathed in light strobes, flowers and curtains, everything in gold and white. You slowly turn to look at Jungkook. He blends right into the surroundings. You cannot help the snort that escapes you when he camouflages with a table. His surprised eyes question you but you simply shake your head and walk on, handing over the bouquet to the guy collecting everyone’s gifts for the bride and groom, and then find yourself a place to sit. By some lucky twist of fate, Jungkook spots a friend and ends up hanging out with the guy, giving you enough time to breathe.
To your surprise and utter horror, though, you find your gaze jumping back to him every few minutes. You want to play it off as being wary of what he might get up to when left unsupervised, but you don’t wanna lie to yourself. Because you know your staring has something to do with the way his suit jacket molds over his broad shoulders and cinched waist. Interestingly, the color looks less and less offensive and more refreshing as time goes on.
Soon after, Yoongi steps up the altar in a crisp tuxedo, looking handsome and as put together as you have never seen him do before at the office. And then Nari walks down the aisle in a white dress that is more frills and tulle than actual fabric, grinning from ear to ear.
And – okay. They both grin at each other with barely contained giddiness. Are they that good of actors or… maybe… they really are in love, huh? Mrs Jeon did say so. You didn’t believe it then, but looking at the newly wed couple kissing like teenagers on their prom, you are starting to.
But that is all of little importance to you because while the entire audience is moving to the reception hall, you are sneaking up to the room next to the bride's and texting your driver to bring the files up to the suite.
It’s showtime.
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How many shots are too many shots at a co-worker’s wedding you’re attending for official purposes? You wish someone would tell you so you can stop before you overdo it. 
But maybe you have already overdone it? But then again, can you really be blamed? After all the pain you went through to edit and re-edit the renewed terms of the contract with the Lims, spending sleepless nights mulling them over, and giving a flawless presentation to the owners – what do you receive in response?
We’ll think about it.
They said they'll think about it.
They’ll fucking think about it.
They—
For fuck’s sake! Everyone who knows the world of business knows that taking time to think is as good as saying no. 
The Lims are essentially saying no – no to all your hard work of not just the past few days, but the past few months that you’ve spent working on this project for. This is why you shouldn’t get emotionally attached to your work. No one in your company is gonna cry over a failed risky integration of two services that you provide as a cyber security company. But here you are, attempting to drink your weight in Tequila.
Fuck Mr Lim and his gangly skeleton of a wife. Fuck everything, in fact.
You're downing shot number too-fucking-many-but-still-not-enough when a buzzing from your phone alerts you. Realizing you can still read the tiny ass text clearly, you ask the bartender for another round. 
But then you freeze because shit – in your frustrations with the Lims, you forgot you came here with a certain menace that you shouldn't have let out of your sight for so long. And now his mother is texting you with something that is making your blood pressure spike through the roof.
Mrs Jeon Honey, is everything alright there? I just received a call from Mrs Lim. She told me Jungkook served them some promising facts that have made them change their mind.
Honey, did they say no to you at first? Why did Jungkook talk to them?
Why indeed.
You're just in the process of typing a response when another message arrives – this one freezing the blood in your veins.
Anyways, she wishes to see you again and is looking for you. Better go see her and seal the deal, okay? 
I am off to sleep now so I won't check my phone anymore. Good luck and good night, honey.
What the actual fuck?
Mrs Lim wants to see you again? When you’ve torn your hairdo apart, smudged all your make-up and can barely count your fingers?
Why, why are you always so fucking out of luck?
Why, because of fucking Jungkook, of course! Had he not gone ahead and done… whatever he did with the Lims, you would have drank your sorrows away in peace and went back home a zombie.
But now you have to break your drinking marathon and go see a fucking investor! You can't do this. If you go see the woman when you look an hour away from death, she will most definitely change her mind again and most definitely inform Mrs Jeon of what she witnessed.
No, you can't see her.
Furious at Jungkook for meddling without informing you – despite its possibly favorable outcome – and at yourself for drowning in alcohol so badly that you forgot about the dude's very presence here, you leave the next glass untouched and ring Jungkook up.
He picks up on the third ring, a lilting, “Hey, Prez!" screeched into your ear.
Oh, this is not good. This is not good at all.
He is drunk, too.
"Jeon Jungkook," you hiss, teeth grinding so hard, your jaw aches, "where the fuck are you?"
"I, uh… having a celebratory drink with Yoongi.” Lowering his voice as if to shield it from his company, he adds, “Mom insisted that I have a drink with him. Is everything okay, Prez?" 
His voice sounds less slurred and more absent-minded and you wonder if he's perhaps less drunk than you and would be presentable to Mrs Lim?
"No, everything's not okay," you grunt with your fingers pressed to your pounding forehead. "What the heck did you say to Mrs Lim?"
"Wha—wait… She said she was on board! Noooo, did she change her mind again?" he whines into the phone and you wince again.
Nope, he's possibly more drunk than you are.
Fuck your life in the ass.
"She didn't change her mind, she just wants to cement it. By meeting me again."
"Oh! Hey, that's cool!" He suddenly chuckles. "You can thank me later, Prez, when I tell you the exact string I pulled, yeah?"
Wait – string? Pulled? Why does it sound lewd?
Probably because it is so. You're dealing with Jeon Jungkook – casanova extraordinaire, after all. He may have become subdued and more focused on work but you never truly believed he had changed.
You hate the way disappointment blooms in your chest, overtaking all the tension, anger and frustration you felt earlier. And it makes no sense, because why should you care what he does with his private life? He's become damn good at his job and he really just proved that again, didn't he? What does it matter to you what means he used to get the work done?
It shouldn't. It honestly shouldn't.
But the thing is – it does. And it makes you angrier than before.
"Right. Spare me the gross details, please, and just tell me you're sober enough to talk to the woman?" you ask him with a sigh, proud of how controlled your voice is.
But Jungkook gives a dramatic gasp. "I can barely read the letters on my phone, Prez! I'm not sober enough to talk to you, let alone talk to her!"
"Jeon…" You release a whining sob of despair. "You said you were having a celebratory drink with Yoongi!”
“Well, I meant after I’d had a good share of solo fun!”
“Why the fuck were you having solo fun in the first place?"
"I was celebrating! Why did you drink so much?"
"I was mourning!"
"But the deal was a success!"
"You never told me!"
There's silence and heavy breaths for a few extended moments, and then you whine again.
"Jeon, come on, man! I'll have to hide in a fucking closet so she doesn't find me!"
Jungkook gasps again. Dramatic bitch. "No, you know what? Excellent idea!"
You scowl into space. "What?"
"Yeah! Let's – let's hide! Disappear from plain sight, hide somewhere and later tell her we looked everywhere but couldn't find her! For all we care about, we sealed the deal on our end, right? And she never told me she wanted to meet again! We’ll ask Yoongi to vouch for us —” 
He cuts himself off and you hear a muffled, “right?" followed by what sounds like Yoongi’s wordless acceptance.
What the hell is Jungkook doing? And why is it sounding like a good idea?
"Yeah, Yoongi’s on board! You find the nearest closed space to you, Prez, and I'm gonna jump into this coat closet in my direct line of sight, okay?" Jungkook continues, a desperate undertone to his words, and you sputter.
Really? You're gonna – hide?
This is so fucking ridiculous! But also so fucking genius. No one’s fault if you’d already left the venue, right? Mrs Lim doesn’t have to know that you were drinking your sorrows away at the open bar or that Mrs Jeon wanted Jungkook to share a drink with Yoongi. 
Nodding quickly, you breathe out. "Okay, okay, yeah. Let's do it. I, uh… I can see a pair of doors and I'm gonna slide past ’em. Text me when you're situated, okay?"
"Yeah, you too! Good luck!"
Disconnecting the call, you march up to the doors to the side of the elaborate ballroom, an eye over your shoulders to check if a particularly gangly woman with more makeup than she has skin is nearby. Coming up empty, you stealthily open the ornate doors which happen to lead to a changing room probably meant for the opera performers. You walk into the semi-dark space, thanking God it's daytime and this place has ventilators to let some sunlight in. Spotting the back of a sofa nearby, you rush towards it—
And let out a squeak on finding it already housing a human presence.
Squinting, you give a loud gasp. "Jungkook? I thought you were jumping into a coat closet!"
He has a bottle of Smirnoff in his hand and his sunglasses have been shoved up to his hair. He's also lost his jacket and sits here in just his yellow and white striped shirt, sleeves rolled up to display his tattoos and corded muscles. Dear God. He looks really fucking good.
"I was! I did! Thought this was a coat closet!" he tells you, indignant, and points at a door next to his seat. "I came in through that! Where did you come from?"
You jerk a thumb over your shoulder. "A door back there. This is apparently some backstage room. And wow, you really brought a bottle along?"
He has the decency to look sheepish. "I figured I wasn't leaving this place till the party was over. Brought in something to pass time."
You have to admit, it's a good thing he did. Snatching the object from his hand, you brace yourself for the liquid fire that is housed in the glass container and then take a few successive gulps. 
"Argh!" you groan at the burn, eyes watering at the pain the vodka leaves on its way down your throat. But then you exhale and allow yourself a smile. "Ah. That felt good."
Jungkook is blinking up at you with wide eyes when you finally look at him again, and rolling your own, you prod at his shoulder to shift him so that you can fit yourself on the piece of furniture as well. On closer inspection, this looks like a loveseat. It's small but cozy, and even though your entire left side is plastered to Jungkook's entire right side, both your asses have enough space to comfortably rest on the cushy cushion.
Relaxing into the seat, you tip your head past its back, sighing. Then you turn your gaze to your companion – finding him still gaping at you. You snort at his expressions of disgust mingled wonder.
"What?"
"Nothing, just… Don't think I've ever seen you relaxed before." A dimple appears on his cheek as he shrugs with a half smile and turns to take a swig from the bottle.
You can't move your gaze from the way his Adam's apple bobs, sweat collecting on the back of your neck. Clearing your throat to ground yourself, you give a wry chuckle.
"Yeah, because we're co-workers and I'm a professional. I don't have orgies in the company pool or decide to get fifty piercings and alcohol poisoning on a business trip," you tease him, a smirk ticking up your cheek.
He looks back with a smirk of his own, head lowered and stare heavy from beneath his solid, shapely brows – one of which looks sinfully sexy with the barbel he's fitted through it. Maybe not as sexy as his heated stare, which youneed to look away from.
You instantly flutter your lids and move your gaze to the bottle in his hand, gesturing for him to hand it to you. Even his hands look sexy, though, and it is with extreme difficulty that you divert your focus on drinking and not drooling over your enemy.
Back and forth you both go, sipping at gut melting, strong vodka in companionable silence. 
It's embarrassing how attracted you are to him. They do say there's a fine line between love and hate – lust and hate, in your case – and the mild inebriation in you is making you wonder, hypothetically, what it would be like if you were to cross that line. If you were to put aside how your brain feels about Jeon Jungkook and let your pussy do the thinking.
The very thought makes you shudder, something which doesn't go unnoticed by Jungkook. His hand pauses in the process of extracting the bottle from you.
"You okay?" he mumbles, sounding more suspicious than concerned.
You try to play it off by exhaling and leaning back in the loveseat. "Yeah, I'm fine. Maybe I should go lighter with the alcohol, though, I've already had too many shots…"
He simply hums, this time refraining from passing you the bottle as he takes some consecutive sips. Then he clears his throat, and even if he wasn't fidgeting like a fish the way he is, you'd have known he wants to say something because his stare burns at the side of your head.
With a groaned inhale, you straighten up and raise your eyebrows at his hesitant expression. "What?"
He visibly and audibly gulps, but then decides to frown as if in confusion. "What?" 
You roll your eyes. "You obviously wanna say something. What is it?"
"How do you—"
"Jeon."
"Okay." You keep looking at him expectantly, and he stares back. Then he exhales and rubs a hand over the back of his neck. “I remember what happened in Vegas.”
You freeze in your place, breathing broken, eyes widened and heart skipping a couple of beats. And it’s ridiculous, because nothing even really happened in Vegas. Jungkook got piss drunk, you went to pick him up from the club, where you awakened him from drunken unconsciousness and somehow ended up in his lap – and somehow leaned in to kiss him because you weren’t thinking straight. But the spell was broken in all of three minutes when Junkook’s bodyguards arrived and took his unconscious ass back to his hotel room. You proceeded to remind yourself of the hatred between you both, and all was well. 
He literally passed out immediately after. How the heck can he remember a thing?
“Why didn’t you let me kiss you?”
Oh, God, he really remembers. But why the fuck is he talking about it now? You turn to meet his gaze, only to suck in a sharp breath when you find it hot and dark and charged with something you’re scared to name. His words sounded heavy but his stare weighs a ton more, especially when you realize he has turned to sit sideways and now faces you completely. You have nowhere to escape.
“I…”
“Why do you never let me kiss you?”
Okay, yeah, now your mind is definitely spinning. Swallowing past your dry throat, you lean a bit backwards but are stopped by the armrest behind you. And so you sit very still – anticipatory and unbelieving – as Jungkook closes the distance between you two until he’s breathing your air.
“Say something, Prez,” he murmurs softly, but the gust of air that escapes him brushes against your lips all the same.
You tremble. “I… I don’t know what youre talking about…? You don’t know what you’re talking about…”
That was the wrong thing to say – fuck, because now he’s smirking and both his arms are trapping you against him as he places his hands on the armrest behind you. His thumbs brush against your waist, and despite the thick fabric of your dress, you cannot hold back the way your body jumps at the touch.
Jungkook’s smirk turns wicked. “Oh, but I do know… First when you saved me from drowning. And then in Vegas… I really wanted to kiss you, you know? And I know you wanted me to as well.”
You have no words to retaliate, his proximity and constantly darkening eyes stealing all coherent thoughts from you. All thoughts, that is, other than plain negation of whatever he says, which is why you lamely stutter out a weak, “N–no. You’re wrong… I didn’t want you to.”
Amusement spills across his face and he leans closer, this time causing his chest to brush against yours, making your nipples harden beneath the dual layer of clothing you wear. Can he feel them? You hope he cannot, but the way he slowly bites his lip and releases it makes you think otherwise. It also makes you wanna bite that lip yourself, but that is counterproductive to the claims you’re making, so you look up into his eyes again.
“And why is that?” he asks you in a very soft whisper, looking moments away from attacking your mouth.
You don’t think you will stop him.
“Be–because I don’t like you?” It comes out as a dumb question instead of a solid statement, and you hold back your wince when Jungkook’s lips tilt in mirth.
“Yeah? Well, who said you have to like someone to want to kiss them?”
Blinking in confusion, you recognize that there's something fundamentally very wrong with that sentence. But your stare somehow drops to his ripe, cherry red lips with that tease of a silver ring glinting in the bottom one, and the urge to taste it overpowers every other thought you could have had. Oh God, you're gonna fucking die. 
You inhale deeply to ground yourself, filling your chest up with Jungkook’s clear scent that has been heavily tinged with vodka now, and some clarity hits you. This is Jungkook – Jeon Jungkook, your mortal enemy, that you have wanted to strangle on more than one occasion. 
But as you breathe deeper, blink and look into his eyes again, you realize that right in this moment, he is also Jeon Jungkook – the guy you've wanted to climb on top of on more than one occasion. Your inhibitions are loosened enough for you to admit to yourself that you've wanted to press yourself against his huge, muscled torso, and have his crazily veined, tattooed hands dig into your flesh. That you've wanted him all over you.
That you've wanted him to ruin you.
And that you do wanna kiss him like nothing you’ve ever wanted, right now. Your pussy overtakes your brain to make decisions for you, and you close your eyes.
Jungkook takes the cue immediately and erases all the space between you both, torso pressing up tightly against you and lips hovering right above yours, so close you can feel the ghost of their touch. You clench your eyes tighter when he still doesn't make contact, a tiny whimper gurgling in your throat.
“Jungkook,” you breathe, urgent and tight because every little motion of your lips makes them brush against his and you want more. “Kiss me…”
His groan echoes around you both, followed by a stifled curse that you’re too delirious to decipher. “Your wish is my command, Prez…”
And then his lips touch yours, more delicately than you thought they would, but you melt all the same. Maybe you melt because his touch is so soft. Both your hands brace upon his broad shoulders, your only buoy to save you from drowning, and you kiss him back with an eagerness that surpasses his tender motions. 
He reacts with a grunt and grips onto your waist tighter to reciprocate in kind – and here comes the vigor you anticipated. Now his lips glide over yours in harsh tracks, forcing a moan out of your throat. The heat from his body swathes you completely, making perspiration rise to every inch of your skin. His strong fingers push into the flesh of your waist with a strength that dizzies you, more so when they start to move in a dizzying massage, going across the small of your back until both his palms are cupped around your ass. Then he gives a firm squeeze, and you gasp.
“Fuck!”
Pulling away but still breathing your air, Jungkook nudges his nose against yours, greeting you with a smirk when you open your eyes. You’re immediately turning warm all over. 
“Don’t think I’ve ever seen you blush, Prez,” he murmurs against your mouth, amused, shiny eyes staring into yours and tilted, glossy lips pressing against yours again. “It’s so fucking cute…”
You’re about to tell him that it’s because he’s never grabbed your ass before, but he immediately twirls your brain around in another kiss, this one heavier and deeper. His tongue licks at your lips even as you’ve already parted them, tempting you, teasing you, until you’re groaning in protest. It is only after a whimper of irritation from you that he slides the wet muscle into your mouth. Your moan of satisfaction melts into his hum of approval, and you grab onto the back of his shirt's collar to tangle your tongue with his, tasting the chocolate and vodka flavored warmth of his mouth to your heart’s content. You give as you receive, pushing back against his assertive kisses, never one to let a guy take the upper hand that easily, until your lungs start to burn with the loss of oxygen.
But before you can pull away, you feel his fingers digging into your asscheeks harshly – almost painfully – and the next moment, Jungkook is lifting you off the loveseat's cushion and placing you in his lap, slowly breaking the kiss. Your thighs frame his as he pulls you to him, your heated center lining up against the zipper on his pants perfectly, and damn but the bulge you feel beneath you has you driven crazy with want. 
It is with an extreme amount of self-control that you hold yourself back from moving your hips and instead focus on opening your eyes. You’re prepared to continue the back and forth that never stops between you two when your eyelids flutter to allow you to peer into his heavy lidded ones, but you are stopped by the look in them.
Not a single trace of mockery or an oncoming sly remark. All you find is wonder – that you believe is reflected in your own eyes – and a layer of confusion.
As if he cannot believe how amazing that kiss was. Well, you share that sentiment if the wetness between your thighs is anything to go by. This close to him, his oceanic scent fills up your lungs with every quick, little breath you take, and you can feel a droplet of sweat trailing down the middle of your back.
And just like that, the sharp lines that have always demarcated who Jungkook has been to you and what you should or should not do with him start to smudge.
What was it that you thought in Vegas? If you ever end up kissing Jungkook, you’d either have to die or kill him?
Well you obviously didn’t account for how incredibly amazing it would feel to kiss the man when you declared that. You’re gonna have to scratch the declaration, naturally, because you definitely don’t wanna kill anybody, right now. You just want to kiss Jungkook – continue kissing him, without any ominous clouds of  implications and consequences hovering anywhere near you.
Which is why you bring your mouth down to his own in another, more searing kiss, coaxing a throaty moan out of him when your tongue flicks at the ring pierced through his bottom lip. As you travel further and lick a path across the back of his teeth, the cold metal of the jewelry presses into your heated skin, a sexy reminder of how unbelievably hot the guy you’re kissing actually is.
While your fingers busy themselves in carding through his hair to position his head the way you would like it to be, Jungkook's hands slowly travel down your legs, and then back upwards, beneath your dress, tracing your thighs and reaching up to your waist. His knuckles slowly flutter across the span of your stomach, encircling your belly button. 
Breath hitching at the arousal that floods out of you at the tender touch, you run your hands down the front of his shirt and tug it up, separating from his mouth to pull the thing off without bothering to unbutton it. The sleeveless, black undershirt he wears surprises you, but the broad, muscular shoulders and thick biceps you have bared have drool collecting in your mouth. Not to mention the intricate inking one of his arm houses. 
Fuck, he’s seriously so fucking sexy.
Jungkook's hands decide to retribute while you're distracted by his arms, coming up to yank at the off-shoulders neckline of your dress, pulling it off your breasts to have it pool at your waist, without unzipping it. He might’ve ruined the fabric, but you can’t find it in yourself to speak a word of protest when you find his mesmerized gaze fixed upon your heaving chest that is encased in a strapless bra. 
Thickly swallowing, you attempt to control your breathing, but the way his expanded pupils travel over every inch of your exposed flesh makes all processing in your brain just come to a halt. And then his hand reaches for the bra, two fingers sliding between the cloth and your skin. Your body convulses at the sensation, lips parting and breathing picking up even more.
His eyes meet yours in a silent question, which you answer with a frantic nod and digging your nails into his shoulders.
Jungkook tugs at the cloth, pulling it down to join your dress at your waist in one, firm motion, and as your breasts jump free, a responsive curse is hissed out through his lips.
"You're so fucking sexy, Prez," he lowly grunts, snaking a hand behind your back to press in the middle of your shoulder blades, and then pulls you in to wrap his lips around one of the peaks, just as his free hand closes over the other.
A muted cry escapes you, broken and whimpered, the warmth of his mouth and the softness of his tongue against your nipple feels so amazing. As his hand fondles the other breast, pleasure expands through your veins, tapering down to collect at the juncture of your thighs. Every movement of his is this perfect coalition of tender and rough, all in the right amounts.
“Fuck,” you hiss out, eyes screwed shut and lower lip trapped between your teeth when he pulls you closer, opening his mouth wider to suck on your flesh. “Jungkook, that’s – fuck, that feels so good…”
His teeth come in to work on your sensitive skin and tongue flicks at your nipple, making your hold on him tighter by the second. He switches sides, leaving your bruised nipple to attack the unattended one with the same urgency. 
Gasping for breath, you rake your nails over the back of his neck, barely open eyes catching the wisps of the back tattoo he got in Vegas, and you rush to clench your fists into his undershirt, needing it off of his body. He makes a sound of surprise against your boob before pulling back with a wet smack, and meets your hooded eyes with his own.
“Something wrong, baby?”
Fuck. Who allowed him to call you that? In that husky fucking baritone? And who allowed you to whimper at the sound?
Jungkook’s palm slides from your back to join his other hand on your breasts and he looks straight into your eyes as he massages the two mounds, pushing them together and squeezing them roughly. He pinches the thumb and forefinger of both his hands to pluck at your nipples at the same time, and your body gives a helpless shudder of saturated pleasure. Holy fuck, this guy is driving you insane.
“Take… take this off,” y0u manage to murmur in the middle of his ministrations, tugging at the black garment that you’ve already lifted up to his chest. “Off,” you grunt, prompting him to separate his hands from your body while you quickly pull the clothing off his torso.
Shakily, your eyes scan the contours and planes of his body that you’ve seen on so many occasions before but never ever in one as intimate as this. Tentatively, your hands reach for his skin. It is deliciously warm, the underlying muscle feels as firm as it looks. 
Breathing ragged and too loud in this quiet space, you meet Jungkook’s lidded eyes. His own exhales echo around you both, hot and heavily weighed down by anticipation. You glide your palm down his pecs to the chiseled set of abs you can see heaving with every breath he takes, nails raking against the defined cut of his v-line.
You’re not just at the peak of your arousal, you’re also caught in absolute awe.
Every inch of him is so beautiful, all the way from his sculpted body to his delicate face. His round eyes and his sharp nose. And those thin but luscious lips. Damn. His lips, red and glistening, that are currently parting and moving closer to you – and then latching straight onto yours.
You groan into his mouth, surprised but incredibly turned on by the kiss, and he echoes the sound back to you, wrapping both his arms around your body to plaster you to him. Fuck, the feel of his hard chest against your breasts makes your body heat up with a fire you haven’t felt in a long time. Your hands wrap around his neck and shoulders, holding him as close to you as physically possible as you follow his lead into the kiss, letting his teeth drag against your tongue, sucking on it before digging into your bottom lip.
In small motions, Jungkook begins to guide your hips to move over his. The straining hardness you felt when you sat in his lap has transformed into a raging erection, one that pushes perfectly against your throbbing heat with every roll you make on top of it, pushing you a little more towards delirium.
One of Jungkook’s hands wanders again, down your back and past the waistband of your panties, glides over the bare skin of your ass, to reach where you need him the most.
“Is this okay?” he rumbles into your mouth, pulling back to press wet kisses around your lips, down to your chin. “Can I touch you?”
And you just nod, breathing out a repetitive stream of ‘yes’s while he licks a path down your neck to suck on a spot beneath your collarbones. 
His fingers delicately trace the wet, outer flesh of your closed pussy lips. Until your hips move again and they are spread by the pressure you put on them, helping him reach your slit with a muffled groan. You can barely breath past the overwhelming cloud of pleasure that swells up in you. 
“Fuck, fuck, you’re so fucking wet,” he hums with his face pressed aainst your boobs and exhales. “Wanna taste you so bad…”
He pulls his fingers back with that, popping each one of them into his mouth to lick them clean with his eyes shut in euphoria. And as you watch him, your mouth gaping and pussy literally flooding because of how irresistible he is, you decide you’ve had enough of just feeling his length.
Your hands work on the button and zipper of his jeans, determination and adrenaline driving you as you quickly ask him, “Can I take this off?”
“Oh, yes please…”
The eager elation in his voice pulls a chuckle out of you and you meet his wide eyes with a fond gaze. “You’re kinda cute too when you’re not being annoying, you know?”
You leave him snorting at your words and slip off him to kneel between his legs, moving your hands in a flurry to free his length. And, oh God, when it springs free of the confines, you kinda begin to understand where he gets his cocky attitude from. 
He gets it from his cock, yep.
The shaft is long, veiny and girthy, the perfect seat you'd like to hop onto very very soon. But before that you wanna taste it, so you think about it for two and a half seconds before wrapping both your palms around him. Using the precum he has dripping down his length as lubrication, you run your hands along the heated, velvety skin, moaning when you feel him hardening further.
Jungkook huffs out very controlled gusts of breath, mingled with dilute curses, but you can see he is making an effort to muffle himself. And something in you wants him to lose that control. You look up at his slitted eyes and hold eye contact when you finally lower your lips to the mushroom head of his cock, letting your tongue trace the tip, taking in the salty remnants of his precum, before you wrap your lips fully around him. His lip ring glints against the white of his teeth as Jungkook chews the heck out of his bottom lip, his hips stuttering in losing self-restraint when you sink your mouth on him, running your tongue along the surface of his cock and going deeper and deeperyet until he meets the back of your throat.
And right there – his control snaps and both of Jungkook’s hands rush to hold onto either side of your head. “Shit, shit – so fucking good!”
Adequately pleased, you allow your eyes to drift shut and hollow your cheeks to really get to work, sucking him off the way a dick as beautiful as his deserves to be sucked. 
The scent of sex fills up around you, the air turning hot and humid with the combined heavy breathing of the two of you. You relentlessly bob your head on him, breathing through your nose and curbing your gag reflex as best as you can.
Jungkook alternates between high pitched groans and then some really low grunts in response, making your arousal literally drip onto the floor. The sounds are so delicious, they make you redouble your efforts. 
He deserves to fuck your throat. 
You wrap a hand around his base, moving it along with your head, and finish off with a harsh suckle every time you get to the tip. When Jungkook's groans turn to whimpers, you take your hand away and plunge him deep into your throat, allowing the head to slip into the narrow channel, cutting your breathing off. 
"Baby!" Jungkook suddenly screeches while you're licking up his length and preparing to go again.
You respond with a hum and draw in a breath to work on quick pulses, pushing his cock into your throat in quick successions.
Jungkook's hands immediately grab onto your head and tear you off of him. Confused and delirious, you blink at him through tears. "Wha…?"
"Too much, fuck, that’s t–too much… Come here,” he explains after a series of hitches in his breath. "Wanna fuck your pussy before I come…"
You smack your lips, looking up at him with a half smile that morphs into a smirk when you find him shaking his head at you in what looks like astonishment. You rise a little bit pause before you can get up, instead leaning over his body to plant some much needed kisses on the contours of his abs. He hisses out a curse when your teeth come out to play, and when you feel his flesh jump at a particularly sharp bite, you immediately soothe it with your tongue.
"Come up here, Prez," he murmurs around a groan, tugging at your arm, but you stay licking the ridges up his body.
Finally, Jungkook tugs at both of your wrists to drag you up his fram and locks them behind his neck. Slowly and silently folding your legs around his, you meet his crazed, dilated eyes, and lower your clothed pussy onto his bare length. Despite the damp cotton of your panties sticking to your wet flesh, you feel every vein in his throbbing length pressing up against you. 
It feels heavenly. But you need more.
“Jungkook,” you quickly mumble, unable to hold still with the way your clit keeps brushing against him with every move.
He pulls his gaze away from your boobs to meet your eyes in question, before one of his hands is wrapping around your waist to tug you closer. “Yeah?”
The motion rubs his cock against your pussy more firmly, eliciting a gasping whine out of you. Jungkook hums in satisfaction, leisurely brushing your hair off a shoulder to lean down to plant hot, open-mouthed kisses along your flesh.
“Need you to fuck me, Jungkook…”
He nods against your neck and rakes his teeth against your sensitive skin, breathing out a quiet, “I’ve got a condom in the back pocket of my pants.”
You reach out just as he lifts himself up a little to help you access the pocket – and then you pause. Lean back. Meet his confused gaze with a cocked eyebrow. 
“You came to Yoongi’s wedding… with a condom?”
The way his cheeks flood with red would make you laugh out loud if it weren’t for the mess you are currently making on his dick. “I…”
He’s really foundering. You narrow your eyes at him, not because you’re offended – you’re way too turned on to be thinking of that, right now – but because you never realized how fun it is to fluster Jungkook, always having been on the receiving side of the teasing between you two. 
Clicking your tongue, you slowly shake your head in faux disappointment. “A total fuckboy, huh?”
That makes Jungkook scowl at you. “Hey, at least I practice safe sex. You should be appreciative given the position you’re in.” 
He gives his hips a jerk to emphasize the exact position he mentioned, and a breathy moan tumbles out of you at the friction, unbidden. 
Shit, yeah, maybe he’s right. 
But you don’t like the characteristic cocky smirk he throws your way at your reaction – however justified might it be – so you snap back with a, “I can very easily remove myself from the situation, Jeon. You really wanna push your luck?”
He doesn’t give you the submission you were expecting in return, instead choosing to look at you darkly from beneath his brows. “Really?” comes his taunting rasp, traveling down to your cunt which obediently leaks out more juices. 
Fuck, have you bitten off more than you can chew, by any chance? His challenging, stormy eyes are making it so fucking hard to breathe, but yeah. Maybe bluffing when you’re actually aching for his cock wasn’t the best of strategies.
Jungkook’s free hand reaches behind you to grab a handful of your ass and give it a rough squeeze that makes you yelp in surprise. The motion triggers your hips to rub against him again, your clit bumping into his pelvis, and sending a tremor of pleasure through your entire body. You shut your eyes and let your head fall back over your neck, a breathless groan escaping you. 
Letting go of your ass cheek, Jungkook immediately delivers a solid smack to it, massaging the sore flesh with his palm.
“Eyes on me,” he growls, tugging you back in place.
The jostling makes you grind against him even more, but despite the shivers that shake both of your forms, Jungkook’s fierce gaze never wavers from yours.
“You’re gonna sit on my dick like that and then walk away? Without begging me to fuck you senseless?” His eyes narrow and voice turns paper thin, rolling over your body like a gust of wind that leaves a trail of goosebumps in its wake. “Think you’re that tough, baby?”
As if exclusively responding to his words with no intervention from your brain, your pussy gives a desperate clench. One that he feels on his length, given the sudden hiss that leaves him followed by the smirk that crawls up his cheek. Leaning back to raise an eyebrow at you, Jungkook extracts the condom from his pocket and holds the foil between his index and middle finger to wave it in front of your face.
“What will it be, Prez?”
Fuck, he’s really calling your bluff. It is embarrassing but also somewhat very arousing that Jungkook is able to tell how turned on you are and confidently toss a challenge like that at you. He won’t be doing this if he wasn’t absolutely sure he had you. You would like to think he knows you well enough to know that you would leave if you could.
Which means he knows that you can’t leave now. The thought frustrates you and makes you shiver at the same time.
Fuck fuck fuck, you hate this. 
That annoying smirk on his face makes you tingle with the need to say no. Shoot him down. Nip his confidence in the bud. But that’s not gonna happen when you don’t wanna sit here without his dick in you for another second. 
You can’t believe yourself but you’re impossibly close to begging. Like, literally on the edge. One more remark from him and your lust-addled mind will make you scream. It  is already berating you for the condom remark, you really don’t wanna scream. Or cry. Oh, dear God, you do not wanna cry! 
But you will if your mouth does anything other than say yes.
Knowing your mouth and its tendency to run itself around Jungkook, you bite down on your bottom lip and reach forward to pluck the metallic foil out of Jungkook’s hand. His mouth drops open in surprise. 
Before he can speak, though, you lift a finger to hover against his lips. “But I won’t beg.”
He’s smirking again, brushing a kiss against your finger, and then he allows you to lift off his lap. His rock hard length stands erect between your bodies, fully coated with your juices and curving just slightly towards his washboard abdomen. The head is red and angry, just as eager for your pussy as you are for it. You wrap a hand around the veiny length, sliding it up and down a few times while you tear open the condom with your teeth. 
Jungkook’s head tips to a side, eyelids lowered, and a deep sigh leaves him. “I take it as my duty to make you beg, in that case…”
A snort escapes you at that and you lean forward to rake your teeth over one of his nipples in punishment. His reaction is instantaneous, both hands gripping onto your ass and hips lifting off. Satisfied, you slowly roll the rubber over him until it’s perfectly stretched onto his massive shaft.
“Ready?” Jungkook whispers, reaching between your legs to pull the crotch of your panties to the side. “Holy fuck, you’re more than ready…”
Two of his fingers slip into you without resistance, making you grip onto his shoulders. 
“Baby, you’re drowning my fingers.” There’s wonder in his voice beneath the husky gravel. “What will I do with you?”
His lips brush your chin, sliding down the line of your throat to suck at the base of your throat.
“F–fuck me, hopefully?” you provide a whimpered response to his question, causing the fingers in you to curve.
And, fuck, they hit you right where you need them to. Arching in his embrace, you press your forehead into Jungkook’s neck. 
“You like that?” His hot breath traverses over your sweat coated skin, making you shudder. 
“Yeah… But still want your dick…”
Jungkook gives a huff of laughter and you pull back to grin at him. Shaking his head, he brushes an almost fond kiss against your lips. “And my dick wants you. But first.” He passes you a saccharine smile. “Say please.”
Oh, for fuck’s sake! “Jungkook, I swear—”
“Nope. Gimme the magic word.”
He is so fucking annoying, how did you think you could have sex with him without popping a vein? His fingers start to massage that spongy spot in you, right then, as if to answer your rhetorical question, and you slump against his tattooed shoulder.
“F–fuck, Jungkook, that’s—”
“Still not what I wanna hear,” he interrupts you, this time with his own voice getting breathier, but his demand stays as relentless.
The pads of his digits get rougher, pushing hard and moving fast, inching you closer and closer to your high.
“Say it, baby,” he murmurs into the crown of your head, slowly swiping his thumb across your clit. “Say it…”
And you cry out, mouth open and eyes shut, shuddering in his lap as Jungkook continues to fuck you open with his fingers. The swipes of his thumb gain traction, too, getting harsher and rougher, until a squealed curse escapes you and your nails dig into his biceps.
“What’s that? Are you close, baby?”
Oh, you’re so fucking close, his thick and long fingers know exactly what to do. “Shit, Jungkook, don’t stop… Don’t you dare stop—”
He stops.
“Fuck—what—”
“You didn’t say it,” Jungkook brusquely tells you, pulling his fingers out of you with a scowl. 
You feel so fucking drained, you can’t tussle with him anymore or you actually will cry out of frustration. You were so close! “Fine!”
His eyes light up. “Fine?”
“Make me cum, Jungkook.” Grabbing his wrist, you guide his hand back to your weeping cunt, nearly tearing the skin on your bottom lip with how harshly you bite it. You inhale. Then exhale. “Please?”
As if something unfurls in him, Jungkook’s eyes blow over immediately and fingers slip into you again, getting straight to business. His thumb now presses fully against your clit, massaging it softly. A barely restrained shriek of his name tears through your chest, arms wrapping around his shoulders for support when your thighs shake with the effort to keep you up. His mouth, now level with your boobs, takes one of your nipples between his teeth and tugs at it.
The pleasurable sting travels all the way down to the point where three of his fingers are now pushing against your sensitive walls, and you feel yourself start to lose your mind.
“Fuu~ck,” you whine loudly, raking your nails down his arms, “I’m coming…”
“Oh, yeah? Squeeze my fingers nice and tight then. Come on…”
His breathy command goes straight to your pussy and it obediently follows, clamping down on his fingers as you’re tossed into spiraling oblivion. Your vision goes white and electricity spreads through your body, making you breathlessly heave in an attempt to ride the waves of pleasure out. Jungkook softly pumps his fingers into you to aid you, gradually coming to a stop when your body stops convulsing.
“That was so fucking sexy.” You can hear wonder in his breathy voice. “Are you okay?”
Opening your eyes to meet his wide-eyed gaze, you nod with a small smile. “Never better.” 
Your head’s still up in the clouds, but your pussy is throbbing again. FUck, you really need him to fuck you. With his thick fucking cock, this time. Biting your lip, you place both your palms on his chest for balance and peer down at the length you’re hovering above. 
“May I sit on your dick now?”
A surprised laughter bubbles out of Jungkook before he licks his lips and brings his face closer to yours. “Haven’t even caught your breath fully and you want more? Think you can handle it?”
You narrow your eyes and lean into his face. “Try me.”
Ugh, you both just can’t stop challenging each other, can you? Jungkook’s eyes narrow to mirror yours and lips turn inwards into his mouth. He doesn’t say a word, but the look in his eyes sends excited shivers up and down your body.
He wraps the hand that just exited you around his length and lines himself up with your center, other arm still firm around your middle. At this rate, he’s gonna leave a permanent mark in the shape of his wrist on the side of your waist.
You both are so close, sealed together from the waist up, that you can see nothing but his face, those amazing tattoos and those solid pecs that your breasts are flattened against. So you lean down to lick at the gorgeous silver ring on his lip.
“Fuck, c’mere,” he breathes, eyes drifting shut and head tilting to catch your lips in a harsh kiss. 
His cock slowly glides down the slippery mess that’s become of your pussy until it nudges at your slit. Circling it once, Jungkook gives a tight grunt against your tongue and pushes in. You stifle the whimper that rises up inyu at the sensation, kissing him harder. The arm on your waist controls your body, slowly bringing you down to sit on his dick like you requested, stretching your pussy out gradually.
“You’re so fucking tight,” he hisses between your lips, nipping at your tongue as if in punishment.
But he’s into something because the stretch keeps going. God, is that how thick he is? Your mouth did a good job then, because you’re literally being stuffed full the way you never have before. How the fuck does this guy also own a massive cock on top of being one of the most gorgeous human beings you’ve ever seen?
You would protest the unfairness of it all, but your breath and thoughts are both stolen away when Jungkook bottoms out, landing your thighs over his, and scrapes his teeth over your tongue at the same time. 
"You okay?" is roughly whispered against your teeth, prompting a nod from you. 
"Yeah.”
"Wanna move?"
"Yeah…"
Your hands claw at his shoulders, attempting to find purchase, until they wind up in his hair, nails scratching and fists tugging. And then you start to rock your hips against him, slowly. 
Fuck.
He's huge inside you, reaching your sensitive spot with the littlest of maneuvering.
Jungkook's hand that doesn't hold your waist spans the roundness of your ass in a tantalizing caress, slowly inching up the curve of your spine as your hips start to form a rhythm. Somehow warmer than your overheated flesh, the sturdy brush of his palm up your back makes the desire tightening in your lower belly feel all the more heavier. Then he brushes his back down to your ass and supports it to aid your movement.
You detach from his mouth to catch your breath, eyes blearily parting to take in Jungkook's fucked out face. His lips are swollen from your teeth and parted to allow his heavy breathing, eyes are shut and eyebrows slightly scrunched up. Definitely going to your mental wank-bank. 
Leaning back a couple of inches, you pick up pace with your hips and let your gaze travel down his throat. Tan skin dotted with sweat leads to his sculpted collarbones, one side of which carries the tail of the dragon tattoo on his back. A tiny moan escaping you at the sight, you lean down to plant your lips over the ink, licking across his collarbone with the tip of your tongue, and then latch onto the warm flesh with your teeth.
"Fuck, fuck, baby…"
Jungkook's moan is gravelly and shoots straight to your pussy. You exhale against his skin, grinding down on him to maximize the force of each thrust. Damn that feels good – too good. You bounce on him quicker, coming down harder each time and every few minutes, you allow your muscles a rest by grinding down on him. But slowly the pressure on your clit starts to feel more explosive with every move, until a point comes when it makes you pull away from his skin to draw in a broken gasp. 
Jungkook jumps at the opportunity to take charge. 
“Let me help you, baby,” he mutters as his huge hands grab firmly onto your ass.
With his grip tight, he pulls you away and off his cock and then brings you back down. You both groan in unison at the way your flesh meets in a wet slap, but then Jungkook repeats the action, guiding your hips with such precision that the head of his cock meets the spongy bundle of nerves up your channel every single time.
"Shit! So good!" you gasp, closing your eyes and tipping your head back. “Fuck!”
Jungkook leans down to press a kiss to your sternum, then moves to take a nipple into his mouth. Sucking on it so hard, the sensitive nub is pressed against the roof of his mouth, he has you at the verge of screaming. You're absolutely lost to the sensations, unable to make sense of anything else.
With a perfectly timed roll, he brings his teeth out to run over your nipple just as your clit presses against the base of his pelvis. 
"Jungkook!" flies from you in a yelp.
It feels so fucking good, you never want it to stop. Can you fuck him forever? That makes no sense but, shit, you really want to. 
"Say that again," Jungkook suddenly mumbles against your breast. "Say my name…"
"Jungkook…"  You obediently follow, but that earns you a smack on one of your ass cheeks.
"Louder…"
"Jungkook!"
"Yeah, like that… Again!"
He switches sides over to the other nipple, and you let yourself go, repeating his name over and over and over again with every breath you take. And every breath you exhale. The coil in your stomach winds up so quickly and so tightly, you feel at the verge of explosion by the time Jungkook lifts his head from your chest.
"Jungkook, I'm… I need…"
Hands kneading your ass, Jungkook gives a nod. "You're close?"
"So fucking close!"
Without a word, Jungkook suddenly presses you all the way down on his cock and then starts to push you back and forth in his lap. A shriek leaves you at the suddenly heightened stimulation over your clit, and your climax hits you like a freight train. Eyes shut, teeth clenched in the middle of his name, your body floats up high and higher yet into swirling euphoria – and then suddenly free falls into a pool of pleasure. The splash of it runs all over your body, rushing to every last nerve ending. 
Fuck.
You don’t remember the last time you came so strongly.
Jungkook rocks your hips to help you ride out your orgasm, but he doesn't give you time to breathe before he picks up pace again.
"Okay… Now gimme one more."
Your eyes widen, slight discomfort of overstimulation making it known already. "I don't… I can't…"
But he is relentless, handling you as if you weigh nothing as he gets up and turns around to press your back into the seat in one smooth motion, without pulling out of you. Perspective suddenly shifted, you blink rapidly to ground yourself when your head spins, while Jungkook presses one knee into the cushion beneath your ass and puts his other feet flat on the ground. Heaving one of your thighs over his shoulder before you can react, he leans down to look into your eyes.
Dark black irises with no semblance of his natural brown left in them stare at you intently as he licks his lips, playing with the silver ring on the bottom one. His cock twitches in you, reminding the two of you to move again, and a rushed exhale instantly leaves you. Jungkook grinds against you in response and you wince from oversensitivity.
“Shit, I don’t think I can—”
"Yes, you can, baby,” he cuts you off with a determined smirk. “I will make you.”
You haven’t even caught your breath over how damn sexy of him it is to smirk like this when he starts to move again. Your arms run above you to find purchase on the armrest of the loveseat, while he leans over your chest to suck a quick bruise into the skin right between your breasts and then rises up to look into your eyes again. Pulling out of you, he thrusts back in at a slower pace than earlier, almost easing you back in after your powerful orgasm, slowly causing stirrings in your veins again. A hand wraps around both your wrists, essentially holding your arms in place above your head. 
More than the delicious friction of his length in you, it is the way he has you trapped in place that uproots your breathing. He’s wrapped around you, above you, pinning you beneath his broad torso with his strong limbs and his athletic fucking hips. Your entire body is burning in places you didn’t know you could feel such sensations at. 
Fuck, you’re gonna die underneath him and it’s gonna feel good. Fuck.
He never breaks your stare and neither do you, allowing yourself to let go and release an echoing moan of his name when his moves become rougher and firmer, and the entire loveseat starts to shake under their force. That causes his eyes to flutter and jaw to clench. You watch the corded muscles in his neck work for a bit, and then Jungkook releases your hands to rise up, slitted eyes staring down at the place where you’re joined. He grabs your waist for leverage and begins to ruthlessly pound his length into you at this elevated angle, pushing deeper and deeper yet into your warm, welcoming channel.
“Fuck, that is—fuck! Jungkook! Fuck—”
“I know,” he practically moans his words out, raising your hips higher to meet his. “You feel so good, baby, so fucking soft and wet and tight—fuck…”
The tip of his cock hits what you are more than certain is your cervix, and as if he realizes it too, Jungkook presses himself fully in and fucking gyrates his hips against the spot. And fuck, but all your thoughts erupt up in a scream that you can barely keep low, eyes rolling to the back of your head when he keeps repeating that same motion with every single thrust.
“Fuck, I love the noises you make,” Jungkook grunts, before roughly covering your mouth with a palm. “But gotta we keep it low…”
You nod as if you understand, and immediately sob his name out when he takes his hand back to your waist. It isn’t long before you’re moving with him, hands gripping onto his sinewy forearms and bleary eyes watching the way sweat dots his furrowed brow which is partly curtained by his dark hair. Every huffed inhale is full of Jungkook’s oceanic scent mixed with the musk of sex and sweat, and every on of your exhales comes in a broken rendition of his name. 
The onslaught on all your senses soon accumulates up into another peak, causing you to dig your nails into Jungkook’s flesh when your walls start clamping around him again.
“I’m—” You try to warn him but cut yourself off with a hitched inhale when Jungkook suddenly reaches down to brush his fingers over your clit. “Shit – shit – shit—”
“Gonna come for me, baby? Give me another tight squeeze?”
Drunkenly, you just nod, eyes and teeth clenching tight when Jungkook’s hand starts to get harsher with your clit. Every drag of his cock against the sensitized walls of your channel pull a groan out of you, and your hips lose their rhythm, allowing Jungkook to move them however he wants. But you can also feel the distinct stuttering of his own rhythm, which tells you he isn’t too far away from his release either.
A particularly rough push of his thumb against your bundle of nerves and you are suddenly toppled into another mind-numbing release – mouth open on a silent scream and walls convulsing around Jungkook’s length. You’re lifted up, lightheaded as pure ecstasy shoots through all your veins for the third time tonight, and in the midst of it, you hear Jungook groan out your name – your given name, not a title – and his hips stutter and seal against yours. He pumps them against you twice before going still.
You can barely feel his release past the condom and the fuzz in your head, but you do feel the way he collapses onto you after, stuffing his face into your neck. Your panting mirrors each other and so do the spasms that wrack through your bodies at intervals, like aftershocks.
Lying spent on the loveseat like a heap of dead bodies, you are as content as you haven’t been in a long, long time. 
But the guy above you is heavy and you need more oxygen than this to function as a human being again. So it is you that finally collects enough energy to open your eyes and nudge at the mass atop you. Sighing when he doesn’t budge, you brush a finger over the hand he’s still got locked around your wrists and murmur an embarrassingly croaky, “Jeon, I gotta breathe.”
That is when he snorts, pulling back to look at you with a lopsided grin. It shouldn’t do what it does to your heart because how can it race faster when it’s just calming down after hammering through three orgasms like a champ?
“Do you?” He cocks an eyebrow and you can barely contain your laughter.
You manage to give him an indulgent nod at which he snorts again, this time pulling out of you and lifting himself up. As he slumps next to you on the seat, your eyes catch sight of his pants and boxers that haven’t even fully slid past his butt. Damn, you didn’t even catch a glimpse of his thighs. What a shame. Maybe next time?
Uh. Next time?
That is most certainly a concerning thought that freezes you in the act of sitting up, momentarily. But then you give yourself a mental shake, because come on. You aren’t stupid. After the kind of explosive sexual chemistry you experienced with the guy, you’re not gonna delude yourself into believing it can end with this.
While you make an effort to shift yourself into a sitting position, Jungkook has discarded the condom to the side and tucked himself back in. 
“Unsanitary.” You scrunch your nose at the sight of the piece of used rubber on the floor. At least he tied it off.
“I’ll pick it up on our way out.”
You know he won’t and you’re just rolling your eyes to tell him that when Jungkook suddenly tugs at your legs, pulling you sideways into his lap. Eyes wide and hands braced on his still bare shoulders, you raise your eyebrows at the gesture.
“Uh…?”
“Allow me?”
Jungkook points a finger at the mess of clothing at your waist and you just stare at him. He's got this smirk on his face that has a foreign undertone of fondness to it, something you don’t remember ever seeing before. Just like the spark in his eyes that doesn’t seem entirely mischievous or euphoric, but comprising an innocence that you can’t quite describe. It all gives you this inexplicable feeling in your chest that makes you breathe a bit slower. As if you're seeing him in a completely new light. 
While you're inattentively nodding, too caught up in examining the pink in his cheeks, Jungkook tugs up and rights your bra to fit it around your breasts. Before moving away, though, he bites on his lip ring teasingly, and flicks at a nipple. 
You gasp in surprise, moreso at your battered pussy that tingles at the sensation than the actual act. Traitor. 
Jungkook grins at your reaction as if he's proud, and you can't help your responding chuckle. You both stay smiling at each other without any reason for longer than can be explained, arranging each other’s hair and giggling at the mess. In hindsight, it might seem a bit too mushy for your taste, but you’re still slightly tipsy so you allow it. You’ve never really spent time in Jungkook’s company without verbally sparring with him in some capacity, so this current lack of words feels exquisitely pleasant. 
Then he moves to bring your dress up and breaks the silence with a regretful wince. "Jeez, this is beyond repair. I’m sorry."
You look down at the damage and grimace at the upper hem. It definitely can't stay up, it's been pulled too loose to fit around your chest. But you've gotta make do because this dress is the only piece of clothing on your body. Contemplating for a moment, you start to bunch it up to bring the waistline higher and hopefully make the dress stay on. 
But then Jungkook places a hand above yours to stop you. You look at him in confusion, surprised to find his face drawn in concentration. Intrigued, you slowly take your hands away to allow him a shot at it. 
He starts to fold the dress down, leaving your upper body covered in just your bra, and forms a skirt with the black garment at your waist. You can tell it will stay on better than the dress can, but what about your top? 
His eyes scan your form as if analyzing it, and then he nods with a satisfied smile. "Yep, you can wear my shirt over this. It’ll be way more secure than what you were doing.”
What? No! That’s embarassing as fuck. 
But – it's embarrassing either way, isn’t it? 
Recognizing the impossibility of your options, you nod your acceptance and gingerly stand up to slip into your shoes. 
The shirt is thrown over the back of the loveseat, next to his blazer and your bag, glaring at you in all its yellow and white striped glory. 
To think you hated it when you first saw it. Fate really works in funny ways. 
You let out a sigh and pick it up. The garment is massive on you, so you tie it at the bottom, trying to make it look as stylish as you can. But whatever you do, you can’t beat the ‘just-been-fucked’ vibe your makeshift outfit emanates.
“Why couldn’t you unzip me normally, you neanderthal?” you grumble at Jungkook while he’s watching you struggle with your clothes.
“Oh, yeah? Didn’t hear a complaint when you were busy ogling my biceps.” He gives a playful scoff.
Even though that is true, you turn to scowl at him just because you can. “You distracted me so you could ruin my dress. Admit it.”
At that Jungkook just steps up to you, still gloriously shirtless, all buff muscles and sculpted abs on display. He gives off heat when he leans into your face, eyes lidded and lips twisted. So fucking hot and not just temperature wise.
“I’d been fantasizing about those tits for years, Prez. Cut me some slack?”
The way his hot breath fans over your face nearly cuts off the blood supply to your brain, making your head spin. You thickly swallow, too stunned to speak as he steps away with that arrogant smirk and begins to dress up. 
Jeon Jungkook’s been fantasizing about your tits for years. No biggie. 
Forcing yourself to focus on the situation at hand, you try to plan the next step. The wedding reception is still in full swing in the adjoining hall, despite it being well past midnight. This is why you don’t like evening weddings. Do these people not have work tomorrow? Shit, you have work tomorrow! Damn it, there’s no way you’re going.
Cursing yourself for getting distracted again, you frown in concentration. There are still people present at the venue. Loads of people, including some that you know. You'll either have to sneak out undetected, or concoct a story about spilling something on your dress. 
Your brain’s too fucking tired to be storywriting right now, though, and you don’t trust Jungkook’s fiction abilities, so there’s just one choice. You turn to the guy with a sigh.
“We have to sneak out without being seen. Or I’ll have to quit my job and move to Mars.”
Jungkook huffs out a laugh at your words and shakes his head, looking far more put-together than you are when he covers up his black undershirt with his coat. If someone didn’t see him before, they won’t be able to tell his outfit is missing an entire shirt. You scowl at the unfairness that never seems to leave when this guy is in question.
“I’ve been here before, don’t worry. There should be a staircase to the underground parking right at the end of this hallway,” he tells you, pointing towards the door you had slipped through. “Hardly anyone’s gonna be in the underground parking, only Valets go there.”
Underground parking sounds like a good spot to get into your car at. But what about the hallway outside? You nibble on your bottom lip. “You think we can get to the staircase without being seen?”
“Keep your head down and stay tucked into my side. Someone will probably recognize me but they are never gonna suspect it’s you that I’m escorting.” 
He says it with such ease that you have to do a double take. Man, why is it so easy for Jungkook to be a whore? Your first attempt at hooking up in a public place and you’re ready to move to another planet.
Not to mention the casual way he mentioned the impossibility of you being with him. Irony of the present notwithstanding, is it really that far-fetched an assumption? Both of your parents seem to think you’re best friends. Do outsiders really sense the hostility between you two better? 
Or maybe it has more to do with the morals the two of you lead your lives with. 
Jungkook has never shied away from his active dating life – if you can even call it that, given that they’re more of hook-ups – even in the public’s eye ever since he joined his dad’s company. But you’ve always been extremely strict about not mixing business with pleasure.
Again, irony of the present notwithstanding.
But you really can’t ignore that the irony is created by the fact that you really had sex with Jungkook. The Jeon Jungkook that you swore you'd have to commit murder for ever even kissing. Yeah, that same guy gave you three brain-melting orgasms. 
Fuck.
Barely fifteen minutes since said brain-melting orgasms, and you already feel a headache coming on. Deciding to put away these thoughts that are absolutely not going to help you in any way for some lonely night’s 3 am overthinking spree, you look at an expectant Jungkook and give him a reluctant nod.
“Let’s do it.”
He hugs you to his side and you focus on the floor, letting your hair curtain your face as you follow his lead into the hallway. You don’t see any feet in your line of sight and hope that the bar you had been at earlier is now empty. In no time, Jungkook expertly guides the two of you to the stairwell. 
“Through here, come on.” He pushes the door open to allow you to step onto the really narrow and winding staircase. 
And damn, the cobwebs and the dirt? This is some sort of secret passage that you’re pretty certain Jungkook got to know about for less than noble reasons  – a fact he didn’t mention but a fact that probably should have been obvious. It stinks like moss, but you’ll choose pinching your nose over humiliating yourself in public, thank you. 
The moment you finally exit onto the dimly lit parking, a loud exhale of relief leaves you. “Holy fuck, that was so stressful.”
“You can say that again,” Jungkook agrees with his own sigh of relief, walking up to where you stand bent, your hands braced on your knees. “You okay, Prez?”
The title gives you a pause. He… slowly stopped calling you that when you two got too intense, didn’t he? ‘Baby’ became a constant occurrence and he even said your given name once. Somehow, him switching back to your title feels normal but also awkward at the same time.
Come on, dude, you reprimand yourself. You’d probably punch him if he called you baby.
Exhaling one more, you stand up straight and turn to look at Jungkook. “I’m okay. Just haven’t done a walk of shame since college.”
Jungkook’s lips split into a goofy grin. “Yeah?”
“Swear this was worse than sneaking out after hooking up with my ex.”
His eyes immediately widen with unbridled excitement. “Ooh, do tell me more?”
You’re about to respond when your gaze catches the multiple marks blooming over his collarbone and throat. You did a good job with those. But you can't even properly recall doing it, you were so caught up in the act. 
Rolling your eyes at his words, you wave a hand before Jungkook's face. “We’re not there yet, dude, don’t push it.”
He takes it in good humor and laughs aloud, while you text your driver to inform him where to pick you up from. He says he’d be there in a minute, and you tell Jungkook that. 
“Oh, cool! Efficient guy.”
You were kinda hoping this would prompt Jungkook to call for his own ride. But when he makes no move to do so, you frown at him. “Um, how, uh, how did you get here?"
"In my limo. With my driver."
Your eyebrows arch up. "And… why aren't you calling him?"
He blinks at you. "Because I'm going back to your place, Prez. Obviously."
What. What? "Wha—you’re what?"
"Yep. Can't stop me if you try, now. You're in love with me."
His goofy grin is now wider than ever, pushing his nose into an adorable scrunch. And you are sputtering, a scoff rising up your throat but a humorless chuckle of astonishment actually leaving it.
The audacity?
But also the absolutely fascinating concept of taking him home?
You’re offended but you’re also intrigued.
“I am… not. In love with you. What the fuck?”
“Ah, denial?” Jungkook purses his lips and nods in mock seriousness. “Not a good lifestyle choice. But I’ll allow it for your peace of mind. Still coming home with you, though.”
Before you can protest that, your car is here. And before you can get to the damn vehicle, Jungkook has clamored in and is now beckoning you with a curved index finger.
“Don’t keep me waiting, Prez.”
His eyes are slightly hooded and the tilt to his lips feels far less playful and far more full of dark promises. That you know he can deliver.
Okay, now you’re offended but aroused. What a mess. Trust Jeon Jungkook to turn your braincells to mush. You scowl and throw a loud scoff his way, but eventually get in the car next to him.
“Wow. All this because Mrs Lim wanted to see you again, huh?” Jungkook muses when the limo has started to roll and you’re both officially breathing easier.
He’s not wrong. You allow yourself a smirk, leaning back against the seat and turning your head to look at him. He does the same, wiggling his eyebrows at you.
“Funny how things unfold,” you mutter.
“Hey, you never asked me what I told Mrs Lim to get her to agree, by the way!”
Oh shit, that. 
Instant disgust coats your insides at the thought. Even worse now, when you know firsthand what he’s got to deliver. Something must show on your face because Jungkook’s eyebrows rise high up.
“Woah, not the happy celebration I was expecting…”
You roll your eyes and look away. “You told me you pulled at her strings. I get the picture, Jeon.”
“What? No, I said I pulled some strings. Prez. I didn’t give her head if that’s what you’re thinking.”
Turning to sharply glare at him for his crassness, you stop short when you find him smiling at you softly. “Well then enlighten me. What did you do?”
“I showed her a prototype.”
He – what? 
“We… we don’t have a prototype yet, Jeon.” You frown, something occurring to you right when his teeth peek out to trap his bottom lip. “No way… Don’t tell me you made a prototype?”
He gives a noncommittal shrug, turning away from you and closing his eyes. “Had some free time yesterday. It’s a brilliant concept, by the way. The dummy software doesn’t really do all it can because I had to work with our previously released firewall and VPN systems, but it still looks really cool.”
Jungkook talks business with you very rarely. But whenever that happens, he is never humble, always telling you tales about how his strategy was actually good and the people following his orders are inefficient, or something along that tangent. 
This is a completely different side of him you’re witnessing.
You can’t wrap your head around the fact that he actually made a prototype for your upcoming project, all on his own. You have an entire team for it which is still in the research phase of the project. 
Damn. 
You don’t think you’re sapiosexual, but you really wanna swallow his dick, right now.
Damn.
This is a disaster. 
You really went ahead and fucked him, didn’t you? You knew it would be good and addictive but also really dumb, and yet you did it. 
How the fuck are you gonna navigate your professional life now? Run to the toilets to rub one out every time you see Jungkook lick his lips?
Damn, this really is a disaster.
What could be worse?
Maybe the fact that you’re regretting everything and yet planning to fuck him again when you get home? 
Yep, that’s definitely worse.
And yet you can't stop smiling and your heart won’t stop thumping like a drum.
Fuck your life.
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© jimilter | 2022
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