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somecallmekay · 1 year

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Dick is an acrobat, which means that, compared to the rest of the bats, he's one of the lighter ones. Additionally, since he was a trapeze artist, plus his years as Robin, this means he can always, ALWAYS, stick the landing. Jason, on the other hand, is the resident tank build, which means he's the heaviest with the most strength in the arms, rivalling that of Batman himself easily. With that in mind, I present my thesis. If Nightwing is annoying Red Hood, especially in front of Commissioner Gordon, Red Hood just throws Nightwing off of the building. While on the surface it seems cold hearted of Jason, he actually knows and trusts Dicks enough to know he'll be fine, and Dick could scurry away before Jason could grab him, but chooses not to. It's a way the brothers bond. Additionally, Jason sometimes does it around the manor, but only through open windows, because Alfred doesn't appreciate needing to replace them every week.

#Jason Todd #Red Hood #headcanon #batfam #batfamily #Jason Peter Todd #dick grayson #richard grayson #Nightwing #dc comcis #brothers #bonding #family #wayne manor

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wednesday-if-it-was-tuesday · 7 months

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Batboy Headcanons :)

Jason Todd is a horrible driver because he never actually finished drivers ed (and it’s not like batman is teaching normal traffic laws like how to hand signal)

Tim read Magic Tree House RELIGIOUSLY as a kid

Alfred has to aggressively hide Damian’s old LoA cloaks/tunics because he’ll try and wear them out when it’s cold (in his defense they were made for Tibetan winters and are v cozy)

Grayson’s real reason for becoming a cop was because his favorite color is blue and it really brings out his eyes

Dami thinks Tim uses a bo staff because he isn’t a high enough belt to use a sword

Duke teaches women’s self defense classes at Gotham Community College at night because he cannot keep running around the city to handle purse-snatchings

Tim read the instruction manuals to the Wayne manor household appliances because he watched how Bruce got torn to shreds for being a rich kid with no clue how to do chores

Bruce isn’t a lightweight, but he’ll get psychosomatically drunk super fast because he’s desperate to be in a state where he can provide an escape from his usual crippling self-accountability

#batfam #batman #batfamily #batboys #jason todd #robin #red hood #tim drake #dick grayson #damian wayne #alfred pennyworth #bruce wayne #nightwing #wayne manor #gotham #duke thomas #signal

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heroesriseandfall · 9 months

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Kind of funny that fan works seem fond of describing Drake Manor as being like a museum or a mausoleum in a negative way, because:

In the comics Tim himself actually talks about Drake Manor as fondly being his first real home with his dad (which he had convinced his dad to buy!). He had secret passageways to the Batcave there! His dad was actually pretty consistently home when they lived there! He once ran away to there when they moved! Tim liked living there.

Drake Manor has brightly colored walls and interior decor, Tim’s bedroom gets messier and more chaotic the longer he lives there, if it’s a museum then it’s a peculiar museum of a teenage boy who is constantly leaving stuff for Mrs Mac to pick up.

Edit: more reminders from the tags. Tim’s dad Jack once kept an extremely valuable artifact just lying around in a closet. He also once gave another precious artifact he’d recently dug up to his fiancé as a wedding present (which is illegal). He clearly does not know or care enough about artifact preservation to ban Tim from touching any artifacts he may have in Drake Manor.

The first time Tim walked into Wayne Manor he excitedly pointed out the artifacts on display there. Not to even start on how the Batcave can aptly be described as a museum or a mausoleum. Bruce loves that vibe!

(Dick visited Wayne Manor right before Tim came along and was like “How does Bruce add so much new art and things to this place while I’m gone?? And the Batcave’s so cold.”)

Why would Tim not want to live in a mausoleum? His choice of a Gotham apartment was the theater from where Bruce’s parents died. He currently lives in a busted boat that his boyfriend calls a murder shack.

#fanon Tim has nothing on canon Tim weirdness #tim drake #batfam #robin (1993)#dc comics #drake manor #wayne manor #heroesriseandfall #canon vs fanon

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2xthemoon · 2 months

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Going along with my Alfred the roomba headcanon, here’s a scenario for you-

Keeping in mind I’ve never written a scenario for these guys.

————-

*It’s a Saturday afternoon, and the batkids have formed a tight circle around two roombas. One of the roombas, Alfred, is armed with a kitchen knife that had been taped to its back, curtesy of Damian. The other roomba, dubbed whatever petty criminals name they thought of, is unarmed with three balloons haphazardly taped to its side. A new weekly tradition.*

Stephanie: If Alfred doesn’t win I’m suing.

Damian: He’s the only one that can win. I made sure of that.

Jason: Guys, shut it. Alfred’s about to stab this guy.

*Alfred’s knife runs straight into the other roomba, successfully popping the final balloon. The room erupts in celebration. They’re all chanting Alfred’s name. At one point Damian holds up their champion, causing another round of proud shouting.*

—-

*Bruce and Alfred (human) casually talking in Bruce’s study. The batkids ruckus rattling the manors walls.*

Bruce: what is going on?

Alfred, internally: I just won another battle.

#bruce wayne #alfred pennyworth #batfam #dc batman #jason todd #cassandra cain #stephanie brown #tim drake #damian wayne #batkids #dc robin #dick grayson #barbra gordon #duke thomas #wayne family adventures #wayne manor #roomba #batman

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dcmeme · 6 months

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Citizen: I was listening to a podcast on the Wayne’s-

Citizen 2: Oh god not this again-

Citizen 1: This isn’t a conspiracy theory.

Citizen 3: Last time you talked about the Wayne’s it involved Bruce Wayne being Batman because their A$$ Cheeks ‘match’

Citizen 2: The time before that it was he time traveled to kill his own parents.

Citizen 4: And the time before that you claimed his dead son got resurrected-

Citizen 1: THERE WAS SOME TRUTH TO THAT!

Citizen 4: He was in witness protection!

Citizen 2: Ok that one was shady tho.

Citizen 1: THANK YOU!- Anyways… Bruce Wayne lives in Batman’s attic-

Citizen 3: You’re the reason I do drugs.

#dc comics #dc robin #dcu #batfam #batfamily #batman #bruce wayne #dc universe #jason todd #red hood #wayne manor #conspriacy theories #citizens of gotham

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violent138 · 5 days

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I think Wayne Manor has been totally redesigned from top to bottom for accessibility reasons (e.g. increased doorway width, lower/modifiable countertops, ramps, flooring change, altered door handles, et cetera). It started with making the place better for Babs, then Alfred realized it was more comfortable as he aged, and Bruce realized that it was a massive benefit because family members were injured nonstop.

#I'm unable to sleep due to pending road trip lol #iykyk #anyways this made sense to me #*shrugs*#batman #wayne manor #dc comics #batfamily #wayne manor headcanon #don't know how to tag this but here goes #barbara gordon #oracle #wheelchair #disability

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goodoldfashionedengineer · 1 month

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We should talk more about in-universe merch.

Because I bet that there's a bunch.

Alarm clocks that flash the batsignal and play the Batman theme.

Batman car wrapping foil.

Batman baseball bats.

Batman Squishmallows.

Batman candles labled with the scent "Vengence".

And the best thing is: Bruce can't do anything about it

What is he supposed to do, trademark Batman?

He might as well just show the whole world the Batcave.

(Or confirm the sugar daddy allegations)

Bruce Wayne, one of the richest people alive, one of the few billionaires that actually give that money back to the people, being blatantly used for capitalism.

Bonus: Fast Food Chains selling chicken wings as "Nightwings" with an unnaturally blue dipping sauce

#batman #batman comics #gotham #gotham city #dc #dc comics #dc gotham #dc fandom #only in gotham #bruce wayne #batcave #wayne manor #batfam #batfamily #the batman #nightwing #dick grayson #batkids #batsiblings

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batfamquotes · 2 months

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damian wayne: Drake, will you taste this batter? tim drake: Mm-hmm *tastes batter* Hmm, I think it’s a little off. damian wayne: You know what’s off? Your mouth. Why Stephanie lets your stupid tongue anywhere near her, I’ll never know. *tastes batter* Nope, I forgot the sugar. That’s on me.

#timsteph #damian wayne #tim drake #stephanie brown #batfam #batkids #wayne manor #my post

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shanniees · 4 months

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— ?̸ The mistletoe

Synopsis : You are decorating the mansion with Damian until he asks what you have in your hand.

Warning : My English is not my main language, so please forgive me for any spelling mistakes.

The Wayne Manor was filled with festive spirit as you and Damian Wayne, the bold and reserved heir to Bruce Wayne, were busy decorating for the holidays. While you adorned the halls with garlands and ornaments, Damian observed with his typical seriousness, though this time, his eyes seemed curiously interested in your every move.

—"And what is that thing?" —Damian asked, pointing towards the mistletoe you held in your hand.

—"It's mistletoe. According to tradition, if two people stand under it, they have to share a kiss,"—you explained with a mischievous smile, holding the mistletoe above your heads.

Damian frowned disapprovingly. —"That sounds absurd,"—he murmured, but made no attempt to move away.

As the days passed, the mistletoe became a sort of game between the two of you. You strategically placed it in different spots, and every time Damian found himself under it with you, there was a tension of laughter and blushes.

As Christmas drew nearer, the presence of the mistletoe became more frequent in the mansion. Damian, despite his initial reluctance, began to play along with the mistletoe game, sometimes with a smile hidden behind his apparent indifference.

Christmas Eve finally arrived, and the mansion was infused with a festive atmosphere. During dinner, the mistletoe became the topic of the evening, generating laughter and smiles among the guests.

Later, as you both stood admiring the Christmas tree, you found yourself under the mistletoe with Damian. This time, neither of you made a move to step away, and a knowing pause filled the air. With a shy yet determined gesture, Damian leaned in slightly to give you a gentle kiss on the cheek.

—"You see? It wasn't that absurd after all," —you said amidst laughter, looking at Damian with a knowing smile.

A faint smile graced Damian's face, confirming that even though he remained reserved, the mistletoe had been the perfect excuse to break his barriers and share a special moment with you.

#dc comics #dc universe #damian wayne #damian wayne x reader #damian wayne x y/n #damian wayne x you #character x y/n #dc robin #robin #wayne manor #bruce wayne

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vampiric-bruce-wayne · 2 months

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The Batfamily when Dick is finally pushed to his limit. (pretend like Jason is still 19 for this)

Dick: I know one in five teenagers smoke.

Dick, pointing to Jason, Cass, Steph, Tim and Duke: One, two, three, four, five!

Dick: Now! I’m going to close my eyes and when I open them there had better be a cigarette between these two fingers, come on people, HOP TO!

Jason: *places the cigarette in Dick’s fingers*

Dick: Thank you! LIGHT!

*Jason, Steph, Cass, Duke and Tim all hold up their own lighters to light the cigarette*

#batfamily #dc #dick grayson #nightwing #tim drake #red Robin #duke thomas #cassandra cain #stephenie brown #Jason Todd #red hood #batgirl #orphan #spoiler #wayne manor #source: that 70s show

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audhd-nightwing · 2 months

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okay so we all know tim grew up in the suburbs of new jersey, yes? here are my hcs about that:

- the drake and wayne manors are on a hill overlooking Gotham

- tim and his parents belong to a country club and play golf with investors whenever they’re home

(tim is better than anyone else in the club at golf)

- he played lacrosse in middle and high school

- in elementary school he would wear a polo and khakis every. single. day.

- middle school was the start of his ‘skater phase’ except it never ended

- he wears luxury brands/really expensive clothes completely casually much to the horror of his friends and siblings

- he’s in all AP classes for all four years of high school

- his parents got him a car for his 16th birthday (they weren’t in the country so it was to make up for missing it)

#tim drake #timothy drake #timothy jackson drake #gotham #jack drake #janet drake #wayne manor #tim drake wayne #batfamily #batfam #dcu #dc comics #batman comics #batman

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distort-opia · 2 years

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God, obsessed with the idea of the Wayne Manor being haunted. Being placed under a curse, and everyone in the house being able to feel it, except Bruce.

Jason hears cruel laughter and Sheila’s voice, following him down the corridors. Dick keeps seeing movement out the corner of his eye; the room is suddenly cold and he swears he can hear the cheering of a crowd, the thud of bodies hitting the ground. Both Ace and Titus whine and cower, bark and then retreat at an unseen presence; all of Damian’s pets are unsettled, scared, and Damian dreams of dying, dreams of being dead, wakes up one night with a sword in his hand in front of Bruce’s bedroom door. Tim keeps seeing his father’s face in the mirror, stained with blood, mouth moving soundlessly and forming words he’s only ever heard in a phone call.

Death, death, death. It bites at their heels, taunts them with ghosts of the people they lost, the people they used to be, the people they fear of becoming. They’ve all been drenched in it; some have been dead themselves and spat back out, and now the house has become a gaping maw that feeds on it... but the worst of it is Bruce.

They bring it up to him, but he dismisses all the signs, as if he’s blind to it all. He keeps going on patrol, keeps being Batman, but every time the Family goes down to the Cave the Batsuits are black twisting monsters within their glass cases. It’s so cold they can see their own breaths. Bruce has dark circles under his eyes, looks pallid and exhausted, feels so very far away. There’s a swarm of bats following him around, screeching and red-eyed, and the first time he sees it Dick’s heart jumps out of his chest.

They’re always behind Bruce, faces empty and devoid of emotion. Bruce seems utterly unable to see them. Thomas and Martha Wayne, blood staining their clothes, dripping down. Wherever Bruce goes, they flicker into view as well, sometimes as horrid rotten corpses and sometimes smiling and loving, ghostly arms wrapped around him from behind; and Damian’s the one to shout when the image of Alfred, neck twisted and broken and eyes wide open, peers over Bruce’s shoulder.

The Wayne family portraits keep changing from day to day, moving within their frames. Thomas and Martha Wayne look more and more full of despair, and the child Bruce in the painting keeps getting greyer, torn, skin rotting away as if he’s being devoured from the inside. It doesn’t take long for them to realize it’s all coming from Bruce. The Manor is turning into the nightmares that plague his head, becomes a nest of fear and loss and grief that never healed. They need to undo it, save Bruce before he becomes the haunted house and the ghost that haunts it, before he turns into his own grave.

After all, how much death can you take, how much grief can you fill yourself with, before you become it? How many ghosts can you preserve and chain to yourself before you join them?

#hnnng basically who do I have to pay to write me a 'Haunting of Hill House' and 'Portrait of Dorian Gray' psychological horror crossover #but called 'The Haunting of Wayne Manor'#and it's Bruce losing himself and not even realizing #I'm sorry. I fully blame the anons with the Wayne Manor stuff for this brainrot #rants.txt #batman #bruce wayne #batfam #wayne manor

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mylifeingotham · 4 months

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