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summercreolefanfictioner · 8 months

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diabolik lovers modern college au general headcanons (sakamaki brothers)

• the sakamaki bros don't live in the same house, except for the triplets bcos cordelia is the only legal wife of karl in this au (she's the first wife after all)

• shuu lives in one of beatrix's old condo unit while reiji in one of karl's mini house (yeah he has that house all by himself bcos kaaaaarl)

• subaru lives in the university dorm bcos he doesn't like relying on karl (well except for christa's meds bcos she went insane and all that sht so karl might as well pay for that)

• despite going to the same university, the six of them don't cross paths often (except for the triplets and subaru bcos they like to rile him up and tease him endlessly like a torture)

• since this is modern college au, all characters are aged up (shuu is 22, reiji is 21, the triplets are 20, and subaru is 19)

• despite being the oldest, shuu is stuck in his second year bcos he kept repeating most of his law electives (he would rather slack off than pass his law course wtf and it usually takes around 4-5 yrs to finish)

• all bros were mandated by karl to take at least one business elective per year bcos they might be working under his corporation in the near future (ayato's major is business so he has no escape)

• reiji is an exception to this rule bcos he had been granted by karl to focus only on neurosurgery since "he's the only son who doesn't disrespect me" (tbh it was only a ruse by karl since he has no reasons to make reiji his heir despite him being a genius 💀💀💀)

• ayato is so famous in the university like his red hair stands out and his status as the university's most popular basketball player made him the school IT boy

• but bcos he's a varsity player, he's not often at school so he had to take weekend classes (this is also another reason why most of his exes are either girls who watched his game or they're students from other univ or college)

• his famous relationship tho was with a rich girl who's also the main dancer of a popular cheerleading squad from a rival school (ayato broke up with her due to the immense pressure of social media and her fans)

• ayato is also the eternal chauffer of his two bros like hello let him flaunt that red sports car baby (laito and kanato have their own cars; they just don't like driving that much)

• kanato studies forensic mortuary in the same bldg as ayato and reiji; the law bldg is a separate institution from them so they have no idea what shuu was doing

• except for kanato bcos he likes lounging in the music room singing scarborough fair and bcos his voice is so relaxing, shuu listens to it for free (kanato secretly hates that shuu does it tho bcos it reminds him too much of cordelia and her shtty ways of traumatizing him)

• laito is studying hotel and restaurant management on another bldg and it's the farthest one from all his bros (like you have to pass by 4 or 5 larger bldgs before you reach their institution)

• this is bcos ryoutei university has their own dedicated hotel and restaurant for students with courses related to said industry

• so yeah maya (aka my oc/kanato's s/o) sees laito more often than her own boyfriend in the campus

• laito always has exes in every course like there would be 3 or 4 girls under the same course that have already slept with him what a slut

• and yes there is a huge possibility laito, subaru, and shuu have dated the same girl bcos these three would only date the same type of girl (the pure looking one who secretly has lewd desires and digs bad boys like them)

• it was a shock for yui when she found out half of the girls from her class have slept with laito

• then laito told her he likes corrupting pure girls and toying with their minds until they become insane and dependent on him (sounds canon, no?)

• there was a time when laito dated one of kanato's professors and she ended up dealing with kanato's incessant and murderous glares every time she teaches their class. his reason? bcos "she reeks so much of that perverted laito"

• the sbros actually had this same english prof who randomly fails someone despite their intelligence bcos he likes exerting his power like that

• while some of them threaten him using the sakamaki name, kanato had to disguise as a girl and seduce the sht out of this perverted teacher (the old geezer was so hooked he just believed this girl was kanato's twin substituting for his bro bcos he was 'sick')

• speaking of which, subaru got attracted to kanato's alter ego like once upon a time he saw her daintly pick up her bag and tuck her hair behind her ear and boom heart arrows everywhere

• afterward, subaru asked kanato who was that one chick at his class with the long black hair dressing like a sexy lolita

• "oh, you mean me?"

• subaru had nightmares after that

• and yes kanato uses that info to blackmail him to do his bidding

• "if you don't do what I say, I'll tell everyone you fell in love with my alter ego"

• oh btw subaru's major is more on athletics? like he wanted to be a PE or sports instructor/coach in the future bcos accdg to him "fighting is the only thing I'm good at"

• his allowance is mostly spent on repairs on the dorm tho (guess punching walls ain't limited in the family house)

• the reality of his dream is beginning to weigh on him tho bcos some students are scared shtless of him and his violent tendencies

• laito became one of his students one time when he was assigned to be an assistant coach

• "waaahh subaru-kun your expression is so scary pls be gentle"

• reiji actually dated someone from ayato's class bcos her father has huge connections with famous neurosurgeons

• shuu keeps a video of one of his exes doing some cowgirl sht on him (he likes her moans that's why)

• all of kanato's exes studied in the same bldg as him; and yes, they are all from yui's course but each of them from different years and classes (he is picky like that)

• up to this day, reiji looks down on this one female classmate who dated shuu like what does she see in that good-for-nothing (well uhh his huge d-)

• accdg to both kanato and laito, yui is the loudest girl ayato has been with (kanato swore one day he'll stuff her mouth with socks until she chokes if she keeps moaning so loud while he's watching his fave murder docu series)

• ayato keeps teasing both reiji and subaru as virgins (they aren't tho; but despite their tough facade, their experiences are quite hmmm minimal so there are things they don't know)

• shuu almost dated this one classmate of kanato (almost bcos she keeps talking abt those dead people she handled with formaldehyde which is gross so he was turned off a bit)

• the triplets are usually the representatives of karl during his corporate and family parties (sometimes the other three will drop by... well mostly reiji but the other two must've been forced by karl somehow)

• there was a drunk scandal video of the triplets and subaru where subaru was driving while kanato and ayato kept making fun of him

• then kanato was video calling maya and asking her to come over and "watch a movie with him" while ayato was making delusions of aliens flying around the car, almost causing subaru to drive the wrong way

• laito was sitting beside subaru, reprimanding ayato to stop his delusions bcos there were no aliens but only flying trees (ayo what?)

• there's a part 2 but this time shuu and reiji were in the car and shuu kept laughing at ayato bcos subaru's driving is getting messed up bcos of the alien shenanigans

• and reiji was crying bcos apparently all of them are going to die and also bcos kanato is finally talking "properly" to a girl (what do you mean properly he is being a pervert)

• he also said "laito has finally seen the light and started being the good son"

• yui is actually the one filming all this videos tho

ps. I might make memes abt modern college au later on

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wileycap · 6 months

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Headcanon: When he hits his teenage years, Aang starts fucking with his friends by making up all sorts of wild stuff that totally happened 100 years ago. Toph always says "he's not lying", but at this point the Gaang knows that The Gremlin Supports Lying For Fun, so Aang always suggests going to Bumi to confirm whatever bullshit he's spewing this time. And he always does.

The Gaang figures that Aang must be somehow coordinating this with Bumi, because no matter how absurd the lie is, Bumi is always 100% on board and can elaborate on it seamlessly. They keep trying to find out how Aang and Bumi are coordinating the lies, going so far as to intercept Aang's letters to Bumi to check for secret codes, but they can never find anything.

And the truth is that they're not coordinating. Bumi just rolls with whatever Aang comes up with because it's hilarious and Aang is his buddy.

#atla #avatar the last airbender #atla headcanons #king bumi #avatar aang #aang #the gaang #humor

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strawlessandbraless · 1 month

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Angels: Brother, you have been chosen for this mission to save the righteous man from hell. But Castiel, hear me well. Do not covet the Michael Sword, big plans for that sword

*2 minutes later*

Castiel: I will lay claim to this living soul, rebuild him, mark him as my own, and carve my name into his ribs, gonna stare at him a lot, so much, gonna kiss him

#people try and tell me cas isn’t the jealous type #supernatural #spn #dean winchester #destiel #castiel #deancas #gay #misha collins #jensen ackles #spn crack #Michael sword #handprint #spn text post #spn drabble #spn headcanon #spn humor #casposting #cas posting

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cosmicstarlatte · 1 year

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pt.2

Lucifer: 'Demon of the Week' board? Seriously? I refuse to-

MC: Mammon already has two gold stars on the board.

Lucifer:

Lucifer: You know, I haven't scolded anyone today now that I think about it.

Lucifer: Surely...that warrants some sort of...adhesive of the star shaped variety?

MC (putting a star): Wow that is good coming from you. Good job Luci! ♡

Lucifer: (accidently purrs)

Lucifer: Ahem! Thank you.

#DEMON OF THE WEEK #obey me #obey me lucifer #obey me mc #obey me incorrect quotes #obey me shall we date #obey me headcanons #obey me imagines #obey me shitpost #obey me humor #obey me crack #◇˖・ﾟ— › cosmic obey me . ⊹#shitpostcifer

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yumyumlum · 1 month

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Friday night. No idea who made these but they’re great 😂

#lotr #lord of the rings #lotr fanart #lotredit #lotr humor #gollum #frodo baggins #gandalf #aragorn #legolas #lotr gandalf #lotr frodo #lotr memes #lotr legolas #lotr headcanons #lotr aragorn #lotr elves #lotr gollum #last friday night

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another-lost-mc · 1 year

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When They Say "F*ck Lucifer" (& Think MC Takes It Literally) Headcanons | THE DEMON BROTHERS 2.6k words | NSFW | gn!Reader | Crack Treated Seriously Content warnings: Cursing, implied relationships, pet names, jealous/possessive behaviour, misunderstandings and poor communication, demon form mentioned (Satan), suggestive content.

BELPHEGOR

"Belphie, it's time for dinner!" Lucifer sent you to find him, and when he wasn't napping in your bed, you knew where to check next.

He mumbles something into his pillow and you can't make out the words, but you know he's listening. "It's the third night this week you've skipped eating dinner with the family. Come on, you know how Lucifer is."

Belphie turns his head towards you enough so that you can hear him more clearly. "Oh, fuck Lucifer." He rolls over and starts snoring again, and you stomp back down the attic stairs in frustration.

When you join the others for dinner, you jab your fork into your food with more force than necessary. You're halfway done your meal when Belphie suddenly plops down into the empty chair beside yours. He reaches for your free hand and leans against your shoulder.

"Belphie?" you ask him curiously, but he says nothing. He doesn't eat anything either. He tries to cuddle even closer to you instead, and he shoots glares at his older brother sitting at the head of the table.

It takes you longer to eat than normal with one of your hands firmly tucked in Belphie's grip. As soon as you finish your dinner, he pulls you away from the table and back up to the attic. He curls around you for the rest of the night like he's afraid you might disappear if he doesn't.

He doesn't skip any more meals for the rest of the week.

BEELZEBUB

You have one hand stretched out in front of you, pressed firmly against Beel's chest. The other is holding a container of sweets behind your back.

"No, you can't have these," you remind Beel for the hundredth time. "They're for tomorrow, remember?"

But Beel's only half-paying attention to you. His focus is latched onto the container in your hand, and if he wasn't worried about hurting you by accident, he'd simply take it from you.

"It's not fair," his low voice rumbles thickly, and there's drool leaking from the corner of his mouth now. "I'm starving!"

You shake your head and look around for something else to tempt Beel with instead. "Lucifer bought these for Diavolo, and we're taking them to the tea party tomorrow."

"Fuck Lucifer," Beel growls, and it's the loudest and angriest he's sounded yet. You both look startled by the outburst; your hand slips away from holding him back, and his jaw drops open when he realizes what he said to you.

You hold the container tightly against your chest. He could easily take it from you now, but he surprises you when he doesn't. His eyes are fixed solely on your face, as if the thing he wanted moments ago is completely irrelevant. He holds his arms out like he's trying to block you from leaving the kitchen.

"I'm sorry," he says quietly. "I'll look for something else to eat, but please, don't go."

ASMODEUS

"Are you sure you should post that?" you ask, glancing over Asmo's shoulder as he types another inflammatory reply on Devilgram.

"Of course!" he exclaims. "You read their comment. ‘Pretentious and gaudy?’ MY clothing line?! No, I won’t stand for it.”

He’s typing quickly and you’re not exactly sure what his Devildom insult is supposed to mean, but you imagine it’s not very nice by the way Asmo cackles when he hits Send.

“I don’t want to be that person,” you start nervously while Asmo scrolls through the other comments on his post, “but maybe you should ignore them? All this back and forth is drawing a lot of negative attention to your Devilgram feed.”

Asmo pauses what he's doing and looks at you suspiciously. “Who told you that?”

You bite your lip and look away. “Lucifer asked me to talk to you about it.” When Asmo rolls his eyes, you throw your hands up. “Well, it’s true, isn’t it? Aren’t you worried this little spat might impact your new launch?”

Asmo jabs his D.D.D. in your direction. “He’s only worried about drama if it involves someone close to Diavolo.” He runs his hand through his hair and looks down at his phone screen again. “Fuck him. If Lucifer cares that much, he can come talk to me himself.”

“Ugh!” You stand up with a huff and head towards the door. You tried to talk to him and it’s obvious he’s not going to listen. You hope Lucifer believes you later when you tell him you tried to get Asmo to see reason.

When you reach for the door handle, you’re surprised when Asmo suddenly blocks your way. Sometimes you forget how fast demons can move.

“I didn’t mean that,” he says seriously. His housecoat falls open slightly when he leans towards you, and his expression isn't angry but dead-serious.

“Didn’t mean what?” you ask confusedly.

“Fucking my brother. Don’t do it.” His hands grasp your shoulders and you can’t help but laugh.

“I wasn’t going to? I was going to go back to my room while you carry on with your…” you trail off, gesturing to his abandoned D.D.D. on the bed, “…little feud.”

He steers you back towards his bed. “If you want to relax, then I insist you stay here instead. My room is much more comfortable than yours. Besides, I just thought of something you can help me with.”

You sit on the edge of the bed and smile up at him. “Like apologizing to that poor demon lord you keep picking fights with?”

Asmo winks at you with a hint of a smirk, and he tugs at the belt holding his housecoat closed. “Maybe we can do that after.”

SATAN

Satan walks around the narrow pathways in his room, avoiding the fragile stacks of books that litter his floor. You sit on his bed and watch him anxiously, giving him the patience and time he needs to tell you what's bothering him. You're careful to give him space when he's in one of these moods; it was one of the stipulations you agreed to before he let you inside earlier.

"So, you were in the garden earlier with some of the stray cats, and Lucifer did...what, exactly?" You've been trying to piece together what happened between Satan and his brother earlier, but it's hard to make sense of his grumbled and disjointed complaints.

"He scared them away," Satan bites out angrily. "I wasn't even feeding them treats. I sprinkled some catnip for them. What's the problem with that?"

You know Lucifer complains about the stray cats that flock to the House of Lamentation if Satan feeds them when he's not supposed to. You know that Lucifer isn't a fan of cats in general. But, you also know that Lucifer wouldn't purposefully hurt any of the cats that make their way into the garden, and he's not usually this petty.

"Is it possible he thought you were feeding them? I don't think he would make such a big fuss if he knew you were only giving them catnip." Satan glances at you and you can tell he's not convinced by your explanation. "What if I go with you to talk to him?"

"Fuck him," Satan snarls as he keeps pacing in front of you, fists clenching open and closed at his sides.

Sigh. Maybe you can talk to Lucifer on your own. Things have been peaceful between them lately, and this is such a silly thing for them to be at odds over.

Satan watches you stand up from his bed with a defeated sigh. When you try to shuffle past him, he wraps his arms around you from behind and pulls you against his chest. There's a wave of warm energy around you, and you feel the familiar feathers of his true form against your back.

"You're not going to leave me to see him, are you?" his rough voice grates against your neck. "You should stay here."

"Tomorrow we're going to sort this out together," you tell him when you meet his gaze over your shoulder.

His hands on your hips tighten. "Fine. But tonight, you're mine."

LEVIATHAN

"I think there's something wrong with your Akuzon account."

Levi asked you to pre-order the Dogi Maji anniversary bundle on his tablet, but the Submit Order button is greyed out every time you try to purchase it for him.

"Huh?" Levi spins around at his desk. He was doing some dungeons with his guild and you've been waiting for him to finish so you could watch anime together.

You tap the screen a few more times and shrug. "I don't know, it won't let me order anything."

Levi opens the Akuzon site on his second monitor and he sputters when he realizes what the problem is. "Lucifer put parental controls on the account again! Why would he do that?"

Of course. You knew Lucifer was upset at Levi for what happened earlier this week, and somehow his threat of punishment completely slipped your mind. "Well, you did summon Lotan on the RAD campus again..." you offer hesitantly.

"That wasn't my fault!" Levi argues loudly. He wilts a bit under your skeptical stare. "Okay, it wasn't completely my fault. Mammon took my rare Ruri-chan capsule figurine and wouldn't give it back."

You rub the back of your neck. You want to be sympathetic, you really do, but you can't necessarily blame Lucifer for his reaction either - an entire floor of the building was unusable due to the flooding.

"You know how Lucifer is, he'll change it back in a few days and we can order the game then."

"But what if it sells out before then?!" he shouts in frustration. "Fuck Lucifer!"

Levi rarely raises his voice like this to you, and he deflates immediately after his little outburst. "Wait–wait–wait!" he stammers quickly, launching himself out of his computer chair and into the empty seat beside you on the sofa. He holds your hands in his and squeezes so tightly that you wince. "I didn't mean that," he says imploringly, and his eyes dart around your face like he's nervous you don't believe him.

You mistakenly assume he's trying to apologize for getting so angry, and you pull him into a hug. "I know," and he nods against your shoulder. "What if I go to Purgatory Hall and order the game using Solomon's account instead?"

Levi sniffles and practically drags you into his lap. "Maybe later," he mumbles against your chest, the game temporarily shoved aside so he can keep you to himself instead. "What do you want to watch first?"

MAMMON

You flick on the light switch in Mammon's room and glare at him in annoyance. You warned him last night not to stay too late at the casino, and here he is, sleeping well past his alarm. At some point he chucked his D.D.D. across the room and promptly went back to sleep.

Great, now you're both going to be late, but for some reason, Lucifer seems to think herding Mammon to class is your responsibility. Lover's perks, you guess sarcastically as you stomp over to where the Avatar of Greed is snoring under a pile of blankets. One of his feet is dangling over the edge of the bed, and if you had more time, maybe slow, torturous tickles would teach him a lesson. For now, you grab the edge of his blankets and rip them off him in one smooth motion.

His eyes are still closed while his hands search blindly for the blankets that are on the floor by your feet. He's only in his boxers so the sudden gust of cool air against his skin makes him shudder. You feel a bit of petty satisfaction as you kick the blankets away for good measure.

"'m tired, goin' back to sleep, babe," he mumbles sleepily.

Well, at least he knows it's you, even if he is half-asleep.

"We're going to be so late for class, and Lucifer's going to kill me. Or you. Or both of us!" You wonder why Lucifer would send you to wake up Mammon, when his own threats of dangling him from the ceiling would probably be more effective. You guess waking Mammon up is meant to be your punishment for choosing to be with him of all demons in the first place.

Mammon groans and rolls over so you can't see him, but you can tell he's half-buried in his pillow when he grumbles, "Fuck 'em."

You throw up your hands and spin on your heel. "Fine, be that way," you snap. Your mood's already sour, and Lucifer's pestering and Mammon being himself isn't helping.

You should have enough time to grab something to eat and make it to class on time if you leave now. What you don't expect is for Mammon to not only get out of bed, but to somehow make it to the doorway before you do.

Damn, he's fast.

He's panting heavily and his eyes are clear now, his razor-sharp focus trained on you. You bump into his bare chest because you don't expect him to block your path. You open your mouth to ask what he's doing, but he leans forward and gives you a sloppy kiss instead. There's something almost desperate in the way his hands cradle your jaw and he drags his lips away from your mouth and dusts your cheeks and brow with feathery-soft kisses too.

"'m sorry," he mumbles, pulling you against him in a tight hug, "Wait for me while I get ready, yeah? Just, don’t–don’t leave. I’ll make it up to ya later, promise.”

LUCIFER

Lucifer pauses outside your bedroom door when he realizes you're speaking to someone on the phone. His brothers are all studying in their rooms - or they should be, same as you. He wonders who could possibly be so interesting that you're ignoring your studies to talk to them instead.

He assumes it's Solomon or Simeon, and he can't decide which of those two options is worse. Not that he cares, of course.

Even through the door, he can hear you clearly. He feels the slightest sense of guilt when he recognizes the tired, sad tone in your voice. Some of his brothers failed the last set of exams, and perhaps he was too strict with you considering your own scores were satisfactory - excellent even, in some classes. He knows that you've been ignoring your extracurriculars and hobbies to focus on studying so you don't disappoint him like his siblings do.

He catches the tail-end of your conversation and decides it's definitely Solomon on the other line if you're being invited to human world outings.

"...yeah, I heard that movie is in theatres now too. I think it looks good, but I'm too busy with–look, maybe once exams are over we can go see it, okay? I think Satan might like to see it too...uh huh...alright, you too. G'night."

Silence follows, and before Lucifer can knock on your door, he hears you sigh and mutter quietly, "Ugh, these stupid exams. Fuck Lucifer."

Well, there's a thought, isn't it? He was going to offer to take you to Madam Scream's to pick up some of those cupcakes you like. He considers it for only a split second and decides he likes your idea even more. His lips curl into a feral smirk, and he knocks once before letting himself inside.

"Huh? Oh, hi, Lucifer. I'm just going to..." but your voice tapers off. Whatever you were going to say dies in your throat when he leans against your door and slides the lock into place.

"I missed you," he murmurs, a surprisingly honest (and to you, completely random) confession that causes your cheeks to darken slightly. You swallow thickly and stare when he brings his hand to his mouth and pulls his glove off with his fucking teeth. "I think you deserve a little reward for all your hard work, hm?"

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spacebubblehomebase · 22 days

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Here's a Huskerdust headcanon!

Every other pet name Angel gave Husk before is inferior to their own inside joke that is "Loser" and "Baby~!" 🥹💕 Made some Cherrisnake too! Because my new AU will be heavily focused on Chaggie + Radioapple, so we gotta show them some love before I hyperfixate on the others. Thus, this is the calm before the storm, should I say? I hope to have your support then too! ^v^

-Bubbly💙

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lost-sheep-in-the-devildom · 1 year

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Lucifer: is that my shirt?

Mc: *wearing a white button up*

Mc: *looks down *

Mc: no?

Lucifer: that is ABSOLUTELY my shirt, give it back!

Mc: what, right now?

Lucifer: you shouldn't have stolen my shirt give it back

Mc: *handing over the shirt, now half-naked* geez calm down, we have like ten of these, how do you know it's your shirt?

Lucifer: I don't

Mc:

Mc: did you do all this just to get me to take my shirt off?

Lucifer: no

Mc: okay then give it back

Lucifer: no

#obey me luci x reader #obey me humor #obey me headcanons #obey me shitpost #obeyme #obey me incorrect quotes #obey me lucifer #obey me simp #obey me mc

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lenny-link · 11 months

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Soldier cant spell

#team fortress 2 #team fortress 2 fanart #tf2 #fan art #my art #tf2 soldier #tf2 meme #engineer tf2 #tf2 medic #medic tf2 #tf2 sniper #sniper tf2 #soldier tf2 #tf2 engineer #lol #humor #tf2 headcanons #lennylink

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iamnmbr3 · 1 month

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Things Draco Malfoy has Done in the Muggle World During His Postwar Probation

Attempted to order from a menu by speaking to it

Almost breached the Statute of Secrecy due to mistaking someone using clap-on-clap-off lights for a muggleborn using wandless magic

Got into a heated argument with the actors in a commercial because he thought the people in the tv were talking to him

Refused to walk in front of a car for fear of bumping into the invisible animals that obviously pull it

Panicked and responded "I have no idea what you're talking about" when asked what the "magic word" is

Complained that his telephone is broken because it periodically emits a loud ringing sound for no apparent reason

Run into Harry Potter unexpectedly in a pub, dropped everything he was holding, and automatically caught it with wandless magic without thinking, thus breaching the Statute of Secrecy in front of 47 muggles and the most famous Auror in Britain

Run into Harry Potter again in the same pub, thanked him for getting him out of those misuse of magic charges and apologized (again) for all of the more unpleasant bits of their history

Accidentally on purpose run into Harry Potter yet again in the same pub to find out why he comes to muggle London so often and how he's doing and to let him know that he's not remotely interested in whether the rumors in the Daily Prophet that he's split up with Ginny Weasley are true (they are)

Met Harry Potter in a pub for drinks to chat about old times except not the sad bits at least until they've had a few

Taken his muggle friends out to a pub that he definitely chose at random but which coincidentally Harry Potter also happens to be walking into so they might as well all sit down together

Had to admit that he may have mentioned him a few times when Harry is shocked to discover that all of Draco's muggle friends seemingly know his name despite the fact that he isn't famous in the muggle world

Met Harry and Harry's friends for drinks and somehow actually had a good time and not been vengefully poisoned by Ron Weasley or cursed by Hermione Granger or stabbed by Neville Longbottom or anything else dreadful

Had to explain to several bemused people that when Luna Lovegood says that they used to live together she doesn't mean they were involved romantically

Invited Harry Potter back to his flat and proudly shown him that he now knows how to make a telephone stop ringing (you just lift it up for a moment and then slam it back down and that fixes it) and then told him off for laughing

Visited Harry Potter at his flat, also in muggle London though protected by the Fidelius Charm for extra privacy, met a very small and excitable owl and had a protracted but good natured argument about which of them was actually better at Quidditch (because obviously if Draco had had a Firebolt he would have won every match)

Got his wand back and immediately transfigured everything in his flat just because he can and because it feels so good to use magic again and then cast Rictusempra on Harry because clearly Draco is the superior dueler and also because he likes the sound of Harry's laugh

Kissed Harry Potter.

#humor #drarry #Harry Potter #hpdm #h/d #harry/draco #harry x draco #Draco Malfoy #harco #draco x harry #draco/harry #drarry headcanon #drarry headcanons #drarry fic #ish ?#my post #my fic #ish?

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leverage-ot3 · 5 months

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I’ve talked about this before but imagine what it’s like for someone in a country/place where eliot is Top Most Wanted and then your tech guy finds a breakout star baseball player on their visual scanner that looks EXACTLY like spencer. but…there’s no way that’s him, right???

and then the next year it happens again but this time it’s some one hit wonder country singer kenneth crane that has like 78 tween-run fangirl blogs dedicated to him. you see a grainy video of him being chased by a horde of screaming teenage girls and ??? no way Eliot Last Thing You’ll Ever See Spencer is a country singer star just. signing pictures of his face right…?

a few months later your intern shows you footage of an eliot lookalike who is in san lorenzo talking about how there is dog fighting in the presidential palace and you just. sigh. because of course. a scant few days later the political geography of the country changes drastically and damien moreau is imprisoned. …interesting

and then a year of silence goes by. he still shows up as blips on the radar but he must have a good hacker working for him because his tracks on the internet are expertly erased.

every time you ask through interagency channels some random interpol guy talks in (condescending?) riddles at you and it also somehow feels like he’s threatening you

and then your friend who recently got into foreign hockey teams sends you a dropyourgloves video of someone called jacques the bear. you immediately get a headache (and watch some more videos because even you can admit this guy is a good hockey player)

and you know he’s a Bad Guy but it’s been admittedly a bit entertaining seeing what claim to fame he will come upon next. and his most recent actions over the few years make you wonder.

a few months later your phone pings because multiple heads of state evacuated from DC. the reason? eliot spencer was in town. you hear two days later a bioterrorist was taken down by… the report was redacted. your hacker tells you spencer and two teammates were behind the successful operation. which, huh.

not even a full year later it is released that spencer is dead and… you don’t know how to feel.

#sorry this turned kinda angsty I just think eliot famousaliases spencer is a great reoccurring joke #eventually an indeterminate amount of months later you see him pop up again and you breathe #at this point all the intel you’ve gotten points that he’s actually doing something good with his life #like he’s changed. and you know he’s a bad guy but he’s doing things that nobody else is really capable of doing. making changes on large #and small scales #he will face consequences eventually you are sure. but his tracks are so well covered already and he’s so slippery so maybe. maybe you just #don’t make your agents work so hard to track him down #you get to know sterling a bit better (and maybe understand him a bit better too)#sterling invites you to an off the books lunch at this brewpub in portland when you’re in the states. the head chef looks familiar #it’s the best food you’ve ever tasted. because OF COURSE it is #at this point you’re not even angry. or resigned anymore. you’re slightly impressed #anyways that’s how sterling’s leverage club gains another member #(mcsweeten was the second member btw. if you’ve seen my other posts)#eliot spencer #eliot spencer meta #headcanons #humor #leverage #jim sterling #(mentioned)#the studio job #the blue line job #the three strikes job #ficlets #mine #a post not on my queue??? more likely than you think #I should make a tag for in universe pov posts #into the leverage verse #headcanons in the tags #the rundown job

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