you just need to start. start that movement. start that friendship. start to create. start with what you love. start with what you need. start that routine. start that assignment. start that message. start that study. start with yourself. start now. and i promise everything else you want will start organically like magic.
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i don't know who needs to hear this, but guilt, self-hatred and shame are not sustainable sources of growth and healing. you can't hate yourself into feeling better, or being better. you can't repeatedly punish yourself for your flawed humanity and expect wholesome results.
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"Honey?" your Orc Boyfriend peers from your bedroom door. It's dark, the only light source is the candle that flickers dimly on your bedside table. It's stuffy and your bedcovers obscure your entire figure. But he knows you're there, he can smell you. And you smell sad.
You don't respond to his initial call. He comes over to you and bends down to your side of the bed. Your eyes are red and puffy, tears running down your cheeks silently.
"Not a good day, hm?" He asks you.
You don't respond, but that's all he needs to go and grab your favourite snack, a glass of water and your favourite book. He clambers on top of the bedcovers, opening the book to the first page.
"Tomorrow will be better, my love. One bad day does not mean the end of the world, although it may feel like it."
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i read this post about someone simply accepting their depression is not going to go away & instead of resenting themselves for never getting rid of it or trying to find so much energy to banish the sadness away or to be fully "healed" from it, they just focus on adding more happy things in their plate.
and that is something i can resonate with.
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you ever think about how many people you've accidentally hurt? you do? but when will you think about how many people you've accidentally helped have a better day? what about those parts of you?
if you can remember your bad moments, you can take a moment to remember you peak ones too <3
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Love does not disappear, but it can hide behind anger and hurt
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you're not a monster. you're you. you're flawed, yes, but you're also incredibly alive. just human. real. capable of great things, capable of change and growth, too. don't define yourself by the inner critic lashing out at you. you're not your worst moments.
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Day 130: Mumbo Jumbo telling you that it’ll all be okay, and that even if things feel like they’ll never end, you can go through this, you can do it, Mumbo Jumbo believes in you❤️
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