you just need to start. start that movement. start that friendship. start to create. start with what you love. start with what you need. start that routine. start that assignment. start that message. start that study. start with yourself. start now. and i promise everything else you want will start organically like magic.
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The positives of ‘putting yourself out there’ are worth it. Having a great conversation with a stranger will be worth the awkwardness of starting that exact conversation. Joining a small community of people you will see regularly is worth having to get through a scary first day. Getting your dream job is worth the scariness of chasing it. Don’t pick and choose experiences based on the level of ease now, but choose them based on how you want to come out of them.
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You are not a bother. You are not a burden. You are not a waste of space. You are not annoying every person you talk to. Your existence matters. Your presence makes a good difference.
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you can have a fresh start anytime. you can start again every day. every hour if you need! you’re allowed to put the past behind you.
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One day, you'll be singing your favourite songs at the top your lungs as you swing around your house to its beat. One day you'll look back at the battle you are fighting today and think about how you overcame them all. One day you'll be at peace with yourself. Please hang on until you see that day.
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If you grew up needing to keep everyone happy and content in order to avoid excessive negative reactions or behaviours, chances are you need to bring this habit also in the other relationships you join.
So anytime the other person is feeling down, you may start stressing over what you can do to make them better, if it was your fault (you may think this even if it objectively isn't possible -eg. this person has had a bad day at work and you don't even work with them- cause you were often accused or blamed for everything in the past), and may stress them even more to get answers to your doubts.
If it happens, try to remind yourself that it's okay to have bad moments and to feel sad: it's part of life as much as feeling good and happy. It doesn't have to be your fault (and very likely it's not) and you don't have to be responsible for everyone's feelings. The person you're dealing with is just a person as you are, and they cannot always be happy and hyped, they do deal with stuff aside of your relationship too (not to say that even if it was something about the relationship, you still can give them space and the ability to process the situation at their own conditions). Let them know you're by their side if they need support or to talk or anything, and then let them deal with anything the way they rather.
You don't have to make anything better for everyone, it's not on you. Sometimes people don't need to be saved by you and that's fine.
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be addicted to real dopamine
be in the present and notice those little things you never saw before, but that have always been there
experience new exciting things that bring you joy
love people, listen to them and create meaningful connections
make art and don’t label it as “good” or “bad,” just let your soul be free
stop scrolling on social media and start turning pages of an interesting book
do mindfulness meditation and feel your body and mind calming down
move your body, no matter how as long as you’re enjoying
listen to music that matches the moment you’re in
eat nourishing food, feel your stomach full without discomfort
get a good night of sleep and feel yourself ready for another day
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2024 is about letting people care about and for you. it’s about answering ‘how are you’ with honesty, asking for space when needed, accepting help and being open to advice, listening to concerns and having difficult conversations. it’s about trying your very best to let go of the feeling that you’re completely alone, and finding ways to prove to yourself that you aren’t.
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