Happy Lesbian Visibility Week to ALL Lesbians!

❤️🧡🤍💗🩷

Lesbian Visibility Week includes:

Agender lesbians (me!) 🖤🩶🤍💚🤍🩶🖤

Asexual lesbians (also me!) 🖤🩶🤍💜

Trans lesbians 🩵💗🤍💗🩵

Aromantic lesbians 💚🤍🩶🖤

Nonbinary lesbians 💛🤍💜🖤

Genderfluid lesbians 🩷🤍💜🖤💙

Intersex lesbians 💛💛💜💛💛

Genderqueer lesbians 💜🤍💚

POC lesbians 🖤🤎❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

Aroace lesbians 🧡💛🤍🩵💙

Butch lesbians ❤️🧡🤍💛🤎

Femme lesbians 💜💜🤍💗🩷

and many, many more!

the butch lesbian community has always been extremely diverse. the butch umbrella in general is extremely complex, but whenever people attempt to distill butch lesbians down into "women who wear men's clothes" it shows how little they really know about the community. the butch lesbian community is full of women who are confident in their womanhood and don't struggle, but it's also chock full of people who have some of the most complex genders you'll ever come across. butches have such varied life experiences that lead us to have a complex relationship with gender and sexuality

the butch lesbian community has always been full of genderqueer, gender non conforming, multigender, genderfluid, two-spirit, and non binary people. it's always been full of intersex people. it's always been full of people who don't identify as women, as well as people whose masculinity is inherently tied to their womanhood. it's always been full of people who identify as men, but in a distinctly lesbian and sapphic way. it's always been full of trans men and mascs. it's always been full of trans women and transfemme butches. it's always been full of people who identify as something other than a woman while still being a lesbian. it's always been full of bisexual butches. it's always been full of asexual butches.

the butch community is as varied as any other community and attempting to force butches into a narrow box is the terf shit and inaccurate to queer history. let the genderfucked butches speak. let the genderqueer butches speak. let the trans male butches speak. let the trans femme butches speak. let the intersex butches speak. let the bisexual butches speak.

let all butches speak.

Asexual lesbians, reblog if you agree

I became pregnant somehow and kept crying that I couldn't be because, "I'M AN ASEXUAL LESBIAN!!!"

This is the second time a dream has made me rethink my sexuality.

someone kiss me on the lips for couple seconds i'm begging you i'm desperate

As an ace person, Like We'll Never Have Sex is one of the most comforting songs I have ever heard. In a world where sex is viewed as integral to any relationship, I hope to find someone who loves me "like we'll never have sex"

Oh you kissed me/ just to kiss me/ not to take me home/ it was simple/ it was sweetness/ it was good to know

Depollute me/ gentle angel/ and I'll feel the sickness less and less/ come and kiss me/ pretty baby/ like we'll never have sex

Even though I'm not sex-repulsed, I still sometimes fear that I will always be alone because I don't experience sexual attraction. But this song soothes my soul. No matter where you are on the ace spectrum, (or even if you're allo) I think this song can be very precious and comforting.

Me, an ace lesbian: Y’know, I’m gonna look up “lesbian” on tumblr bcuz I really want to connect with my community- aaaaaand that’s a naked woman.

Note to self, do not look up lesbian on tumblr without putting asexual at the end….

BUTCH LESBIANS, I LOVEEEEE BUTCHES SO MUCH. I'M SUCH A DYKE MY GODDDD!!!!! My butch4butch ass is going INSANE rn

coming out as asexual is way harder than it should be - because the majority people still have no idea what asexuality is. plus it is very different for each person.

I always struggled with coming out - I still do! - and I thought it was because I’m too protective of my inner peace. which in a way is true, only when I used to think I was bi, or gay, I thought “when the time is right I’ll just tell people and be done with it”. guess what! every time I have considered coming out as ace I freak out because I will have to ✨explain✨.

my point is, I wish people knew about asexuality, and I’m not just talking about cishet people but also the lgbtq+ community. it would just be so much easier.

and of course, it would take the fucking shame away, because it’s time. (but that’s a whole other discussion).

Friendly Reminder

Asexuals can be sex workers (sexual attraction isn't required for the job - spoiler alert, most SWs are NOT sexually attracted to clients, esp with many are old lonely cis men)

Asexuals can enjoy solo-play (you don't need sexual attraction to enjoy the bio-chemical reactions in your head that comes with orgasms)

Asexuals can enjoy partnered sex (you don't need sexual attraction to enjoy the bio-chemical reactions in your head that comes with orgasms)

Asexuals can be good sex therapists and sex researchers (you don't need sexual attraction to be a good researcher or therapist)

I've been seeing a lot of weird hate for asexuals in the dyke community online lately?? I'm here to change this. I LOVE YOU ASEXUAL LESBIANS. I LOVE YOU ASEXUALS THAT AREN'T LESBIANS. I LOVE YOU ACEAROS. I LOVE YOU AROMANTICS THAT AREN'T ASEXUAL. I LOVE YOU PEOPLE ON THE ACE SPECTRUM THAT AREN'T QUITE SURE WHERE THEY LAY QUITE YET.

I AM A POLYAMOROUS HYPERSEXUAL DYKE WHO LOVES THE ASEXUALS/AROMANTICS IN MY COMMUNITY. Along with many other things being a dyke means always helping other members in our lgbt family. Being asexual does NOT mean being anti-kink, it does not mean being sex negative and it most certainly doesn't have any negative effects on the lesbian community. Always remember that lesbians stand with our asexual siblings!

Aces are queer BECAUSE they’re ace

It never ceases to piss me off that some ace exclusionists will claim you aren’t queer because you’re ace, but you are queer because you’re also homoromantic/biromantic/[insert any non-hetero and non-aro romantic attraction here].

I’m a sapphic ace. I am grayromantic, but the part of me that does feel romantic attraction feels it towards women, so I do identify with being a lesbian. However, I am far more of an asexual than a lesbian. I have more in common with asexuals, I am more impacted by my asexuality, and overall, it’s just a larger part of my identity and always has been. I knew I was ace long before I knew I liked girls.

I don’t fit in with allo lesbians--not all the way. There’s still that barrier there. I like women romantically and aesthetically, but not sexually. I can’t relate to a lot of lesbian experiences because of my lack of attraction and my sex-aversity, so although I still feel comfortable calling myself a lesbian, it doesn’t always feel like home in the same way “asexual” does.

Because I can relate to ace experiences. I do feel what aces feel. I feel the frustration of not being able to understand what allosexuals and alloromantics feel. I feel the anger at being the only one in a room who’s grossed out by sex and gets made fun of and infantilized for it. I feel the irritation at not being understood by those around you, how they just don’t understand that you aren’t interested in dating, don’t want to have sex, don’t find people attractive. I feel the internal pain of questioning yourself over and over, of feelings changing and wondering if you’ve been wrong about yourself all along, or feeling like you can’t change because you fear it would just prove everyone else right--that it was a “phase” and you did just need to “grow up” or “meet the right person” or “try it once to see if you like it” and denying your own complexity and fluidity to fit in the narrow box of what society thinks asexual is, all so they can’t invalidate you. I feel the despair at feeling broken, at fearing you’re missing out on something wonderful, at wishing you were something you weren’t just so you could fit in with everyone else and finally know what’s so great about being allo.

I am queer because I am ace. I am queer because I am grayromantic. I am queer because I’m sapphic. I am queer because I don’t belong with the alloromantic straights. I am queer because they way I view romance and sexuality is different from the mainstream.

My identity is shaped by many parts. I am queer because of all of them together, not by only one on its own.

rant but honestly what happened to wlw solidarity. I’m not quite well educated on queer history, so excuse me if I’m wrong

have we always argued about who is more oppressed? did people use to give a shit whether a dyke was bisexual or lesbian? did people think that the biggest problem in the community was bisexual lesbians?

i just feel like we have so much fighting within our community nowadays. honestly why do you give a shit about bi lesbians? bisexual sapphics were part of the lesbian community for a long time, and the word lesbian was often used to simply describe women who were attracted to other women, bi or not

you don’t need to call your wlw relationship lesbian if you don’t want to, but I’m just confused as to why the community suddenly became obsessed with excluding people and making strict labels. slur discourse is dumb too. homophobes don’t care if you’re bi or lesbian as long as are attracted to women, slurs don’t care about your sexuality

im not a mspec lesbian myself, but i don’t see how they’re hurting our community. bi sapphics are not straight, bi sapphics have a complicated relationship to their attraction to women just like us, and they love women just like us

isn't that what being a lesbian should be allowed to be? do we *have* to put boxes and criteria onto our sexualities? or could we just say that "we are lesbians! we love women (and enbies) too!"

I need Carol and Val to be a thing. The more I’ve read about it, the more it seems canon. PLEASSEEEEEESESGRDHIDJWNEB

The reason I feel disconnected from the term alloace and its tag is bc it's just not specific enough and bc of that a lot of commentary on alloaces falls flat to me. The specific gender(s) you have romantic attraction for greatly determine what type of experience you will have. There are so many straight ace experiences I can't relate to. Can you safely express romantic attraction in public? Are depictions of your romantic attraction banned in books and TV/film? Then there's race too. When your race is sexualised and your asexuality is denied, how can you then express romantic attraction freely? When your race is simultaneously desexualised, are you even allowed conventional romance to begin with? When you are seen as a sexual being against your will how can you decentre sexual attraction when no one has ever believed you?

Aroallo on the other hand is used to describe the collective experience of aromanticism without asexuality so there's a consistent community for that that's grown but go to alloace and its less active and a series of random posts, not really 'collective community' stuff. Most alloace content isn't called alloace like aroallo content is called aroallo, but just asexual. There's many ace posts that would fit the label but aren't under the tag. Not sure why but I don't think it's that deep. A lot alloace posts aren't even about alloaces specifically, they're posts about arospec experiences either comparing alloaces implying there's a type of privilege or actively blaming us for arospec erasure. The erasure is real and their anger is justified but again it's assumed under the banner of alloace that having romantic attraction automatically guarantees a certain experience when it doesn't, historically or systemically. The most visible alloaces are predominantly white and cishet. The 'allo asexuality' they have is one a lot of alloaces are actively denied and so we actually have more in common with arospecs bc we both have relationship models and exploration of romance that goes against what is societally expected of us. I relate to Black arospecs bc we share the history of how Black people are sexualised and desexualised. I relate to lesbian arospecs bc our attraction to women is unconventional, experiencing 'half' and not the other.

I'm then left scratching my head being asked to use the privilege I don't have and use the visibility I don't get. Does the aspec community ask aspecs to stand with gay, bi, pan and lesbian aces? Do they make posts on how biphobia and acephobia overlap to protect bi aces? Do they ask aspecs to learn the history of how gay romantic lit was censored? Do they ask aspecs to support alloace victims/survivors with the sexual violence they experience from non-ace partners? Do they ask aspecs to unpack compulsory sexuality? Do they do the community support they wish to see themselves?

So yeah, I'm frustrated. With other parts if my identity and if I don't see certain posts about it I'd be like 'well stop complaining and be the one to say something then'. I could do up 'allo aces are valid' content but again, who would I be referring to? Would anyone care? Is it even possible to make a catchall post that fits the whole experience? It's looking like no. Again I need this community to start to looking outside the scope of their own personal aspec experience cus community is in the name but it doesn't feel like it.

Happy ace week to fellow ace lesbians!!

❤️🧡🤍🩷💜

🖤🩶🤍🖤