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ktkat99 · 1 day

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Batfam prompt I wrote out planning on it being a oneshot. I don't have time or energy for another long story at the moment, but don't want to just let it sit in my outline folder forever. Feel free to use it, play around with it, add to it, use it for inspiration, or whatever.

Tim gets injured while not wearing his suit one night.

Bernard, who has never met Tim before, finds him and takes him home. He ends up losing his memory and Bernard decides to let him move in while he heals, unaware that he's really Red Robin.

Bruce and the rest of the family can't find Tim anywhere.

Days turn into weeks.

Weeks turn to months.

All without a trace.

Tim and Bernard are getting used to living together, and both the pros and cons of being roommates.

Tim will sometimes have nightmares or flashbacks, but he’s also started to heal.

His family ends up torn, with Jason, Dick, and Steph convinced he’s alive, while Bruce, Cass and Damian have all resigned themselves to believing that he died.

One night, Tim and Bernard take a nighttime walk to a convenience store and witness a robbery.

Tim stops the guy on instinct and has a flashback of fighting with Nightwing. He assumes he was a criminal and runs off before the clerk can thank him.

Something the clerk mentions to Officer Dick Greyson when he arrives to arrest the thief. The clerk hands over the surveillance footage, which ends up being proof that Tim survived.

Dick is overjoyed, but Steph and Jason point out that he isn't being held hostage. He's free and yet never contacted them.

Was he in hiding?

From them?

Or for his own protection from someone?

Or maybe the civilian he was with had done something to him?

Whatever the reason, they decide against telling the rest of the family until they can figure out what's going on.

They begin following Tim, keeping their distances.

Tim, meanwhile, after ‘remembering’ being a criminal, can't stop obsessing over his scars, and who he might have hurt to receive them. He keeps thinking about the convenience store clerk and Bernard, wracked with guilt about all the things he may have done.

Bernard stays by him the whole time, doing his best to calm him down.

Tim doesn't tell him what's on his mind out of fear of being kicked out, and Bernard assumes the event was too stressful for him and doesn't push him to talk.

Eventually, the two of them fall asleep together, and Tim promises to make up for his past crimes by protecting Bernard. Things gradually go back to normal with Bernard going to work and Tim, who has no valid id, staying home and taking care of the apartment.

Nightwing, Red Hood, and Spoiler take turns watching Tim and Bernard.

They still haven't told their family, but know they can't just follow Tim forever.

Before they can decide on their next move, though, Cass bumps into him while grocery shopping. She freezes and he doesn't recognize her, but Dick, Jason, and Steph have to come clean.

Cass is pissed, Bruce wants to bring Tim home immediately, and Damian points out that he might not even want to come home, and that they should leave him be.

They decide that, before they make their decision, they need to talk to Tim. Maybe he really did just decide to quit.

Tim, meanwhile, has been using his free time while Bernard is at work to help people who need it. He becomes somewhat of a neighborhood vigilante, believing that he needs to make up for his past crimes.

Most of the injuries he incurs are minor and easy to hide from Bernard, but one day he takes a knife to the arm.

Bernard freaks out and tries to give him stitches in their kitchen, but then has to convince Tim to let him take him to a hospital.

Tim, not wanting to be arrested for crimes he doesn't remember committing, therefore leaving Bernard alone, argues that he's fine.

It doesn't hurt that bad.

He'll heal.

Bernard gets frustrated and shows off his own scars, which he had worked hard to always keep hidden. He explains what happened to him, and how his family disowned him as a result of ending up in the cult, and that he promises he won't put Tim in a situation where he could be in danger.

He asks to know why Tim is so adamant against going to the hospital and Tim reluctantly admits what he's pieced together from his flashbacks.

Bernard is shocked to find out that he might have been sharing his apartment with a criminal, but reasons that that must be why Tim knows how to fight.

Deciding to focus on the problem at hand, Bernard convinces Tim to at least let him take him to Leslie’s place, as she doesn't ask questions.

Leslie proceeds to ask questions, prompting Bernard to be the one to answer them for Tim.

Leslie comes to the conclusion that Bernard is answering so that Tim doesn't say the wrong thing, and only grows more concerned when she tries to subtly give him openings to slip her a message or some sort of sign that he needs help and he doesn't.

She decides that, since he's acting like he's never met her, she'll play along.

Once Bernard and Tim leave, she calls Bruce and tells him what happened.

Bruce decides it's time to step in because something is clearly wrong with Tim.

Tim and Bernard head back home and have a long talk about everything Tim's been hiding and what he's been up to.

Bernard wonders if Tim might be wrong about his assumption that he was a criminal, but Tim remembers stalking Batman, fighting with Nightwing, Robin trying to kill him and a few other things.

Tim was a criminal, and he's certain of it.

At a loss of what else to do, Bernard convinces Tim to get takeout for dinner, since neither have eaten yet.

Tim agrees and they walk down to Tim's favorite place.

On the way there, Batman and Nightwing show up and order them into the Batmobile.

Tim manages to fight off Nightwing as Batman is driving and Nightwing isn't expecting Tim to fight him and escapes with Bernard.

Their suspicions all appear to be confirmed; the Batfam believe Tim is being controlled by Bernard, while Bernard and Tim believe he's a wanted criminal.

Tim decides he needs to leave, since he's obviously being hunted, but Bernard refuses to let him.

Not alone, at least.

Tim wants Bernard to stay safe, which means away from him, but Bernard is just as worried about Tim's safety. They argue, but ultimately both find an abandoned building to hide in together.

They decide to take turns sleeping and Tim falls asleep wondering what sort of crime he committed to warrant the Bats searching for him. He ends up dreaming of the night he found his father's body and wakes up believing that he killed him.

Bernard has nodded off at this point and Tim needs to clear his head so he heads up to the roof to process what he dreamed about.

The bats decide that, for their safety and his, Tim will need to be taken by force and they can figure out what's wrong with him once they have him back home.

They track them to the abandoned building and break in, but only find Bernard.

Bernard ends up getting captured quickly and taken to the batcave for questioning.

Tim, who witnessed the abduction but hadn't been quick enough in getting down from the roof to do anything, decides it's time to go on the offensive against the bats.

He has had enough flashbacks to piece together that Batman is Bruce.

He's tired.

Angry.

Frustrated.

He's been living for months without knowledge of who he used to be and having to deal with random flashbacks and trying to piece together what his life before looked like.

The bats taking Bernard is his last straw.

He decides to start by breaking into the manor and looking for Bernard there.

Bernard, meanwhile, is desperately trying to convince Bruce and the others that he has no idea where Tim is, that he didn't do anything to Tim, and that Tim has amnesia.

They don't believe him until Tim shows up and goes all-out trying to attack them and escape with Bernard, but Bernard is the one who manages to calm him down and convince him to listen to his family.

It takes a while, and a lot of proof, but Tim finally regains his memory.

He and Bernard officially start dating and move back in together.

They like to joke that Bernard had the craziest introduction to the family, despite being a civilian.

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genericpuff · 16 hours

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hey gen p! i was reading a post of yours where you mentioned LO's age rating and briefly mentioned that minthe was verbally abusive during sex which surprised me bc i didnt really remember her being accused of doing so outside of the slap/havent come across any other accusation since, so i've been defending her against abuse allegations, maybe mistakenly, bc i stopped reading the comic at some point. is it too much to ask for some instances where she *was* abusive so i can correct my outlook?? thx! :3

oh so it's really just one scene and it's waaay back in Episode 8-

like i'm gonna assume this isn't a consensual kink play thing LOL but also like. I wanna make it clear also that people don't necessarily defend Minthe as not being abusive, many people who defend her are well aware that she's done abusive shit. They defend Minthe because 1.) she has a lot more potential for well-written character development than Hades and Persephone (as she's actually genuinely flawed as per the narrative vs. Hades and Persephone who are flawed but we're still expected to believe they're perfect, so unlike H x P Minthe actually has potential to do better and grow like characters should!) and 2.) a lot of Minthe's abuse towards Hades isn't necessarily justified but is a lot more understandable when you really analyze Hades and realize that he is, in fact, a piece of shit LOL

like don't get me wrong, I don't think Minthe was in the right by treating Hades like shit and escalating it to the slap, there are FAR better things she should have done... but I and many others defend her on the basis that she doesn't have the self-respect or resources necessary to look out for herself in a more productive way, much of which was facilitated by Hades trapping her in a financially abusive relationship. When you're worried not only about losing your partner, but also your house and your job with it, that's gonna turn into some unhealthy coping mechanisms and responses like physical and verbal abuse as we see in Minthe. She's someone who's not in control of her situation but is trying to maintain her control through unhealthy means.

Hades, on the flipside, has no excuse when he assaults people or acts like an asshole - he's just able to get away with it through the narrative, its characters, and the readers, because he's the rich and powerful main protagonist.

Minthe is an incredibly flawed person who was self-aware enough to understand what she was doing wasn't right but not equipped enough to do better. She's lower class (according to Rachel, all the nymphs are considered lower class compared to the gods) and was originally written as someone with untreated BPD, which Rachel later retconned (note: the episode where Minthe slaps Hades is literally called Splitting, which is a symptom of BPD, like it's not some assumption or misinterpretation, Rachel literally wrote BPD into the script and then tried to quietly backpedal on it later through Discord.) Hades is an incredibly flawed person who is self-aware of what he's doing, but doesn't see it as wrong and therefore doesn't see any reason to do better. But we're expected to root against the former as an irredeemable villain who can't do better and root for the latter who is an actual monster whose actions are justified and excused by the narrative and its creator.

So yeah, that's why a lot of us defend Minthe. She's not perfect, she's done abusive shit, but unlike Hades and Persephone, she has the capacity to grow and change for the better.

#ask me anything #ama #anon ama #anon ask me anything #anti lore olympus #lore olympus critical #lo critical

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stolitzsings · 3 days

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It's just SO fucking good and so fucking gutwrenching how much sense both of their mistakes make for them

And how backed into a corner both of them felt

It's completely understandable that Blitz would feel blindsided by Stolas’s confession- from his perspective it's coming out of nowhere

But this is something Stolas has been wrestling with for months now, and it's slowly killing him. He starts off his day with an anxiety vomit bc of how stressed he is about this conversation, and he also thinks this might be his one and only chance to tell Blitz how he feels. He's giving Blitz the crystal, no strings attached, so for all he knows he might not ever see Blitz again after tonight. He needs to lay it all out there if he wants Blitz to understand

Also Stolas has been trying to show Blitz he cares for so long: inviting him to hang out for things, suggesting movies and comfort after the turmoil of Ozzie's, letting Blitz take the lead on whether to see him for the full moon each month, plus everything Blitz mentioned to Fizz! Liking his pictures and asking him how he is and all those things that Blitz dismissed because he simply couldn't fathom that Stolas would actually be interested in him. Stolas has been giving him space and checking in on how he's feeling and offering to talk about things, presumably for months now, all in a bid to show Blitz they could have more than a transactional relationship.

And he'd been hyping himself up to have this conversation, telling himself it could go great! Maybe Blitz would be just as happy as he was! Maybe he felt the same and this would all work out!

But even though Blitz does care about him, he's fucking terrified to show or even acknowledge it, because feelings mean getting hurt. And he's been shutting himself off from the possibility of Stolas having those feelings for months as well. He can't allow himself to hope for anything more, and anyway it would just complicate things, so best to stick to nice, safe sex stuff like he's sure Stolas wants to anyway.

So he completely misses all the times Stolas is trying to give them a way forward, and as a result he just can't believe Stolas’s confession could be real. And then he REALLY fucks up. This has to be a sex thing, right? The one thing he's convinced himself Stolas wants, especially tonight? He's thinking "there's no way anyone could love me like this," but all Stolas hears is "there's no way YOU could love me like this."

Because while Blitz has been shutting out any hope that Stolas could love him, Stolas has been CLINGING to scraps of hope that Blitz might love him, in order to give himself the strength to have the conversation they're having now. I don't think he understands why Blitz wouldn't leap at the chance to believe him.

To Stolas, this is confirmation that Blitz still sees their relationship as the same as it was after Ozzie's, when he said their relationship was just sex and Stolas SAW how unhappy he was. Clearly, Blitz still feels this whole thing is about Stolas wanting Blitz to fuck him, and it's not fair to keep him trapped in that dynamic. He thinks the conversation is over, he has his answer because Blitz wasn't happy then so he clearly isn't happy now.

Stolas spends the rest of the scene trying to bow out gracefully. He thanks Blitz for changing his life and tries to escape before he really breaks down. Remember, he's going through an acrimonious and, to be frank, VIOLENT divorce right now, with the person that he's terrified of becoming in his relationship with Blitz. He would do anything to get out of his shitty relationship quietly, so clearly the kindest thing he could do is let Blitz go without making a fuss.

But Blitz is only just realizing that he read the situation so wrong. When he chases after Stolas, Stolas might see it as just another person following him around his house to yell at him. For Blitz, though, he's scared, he's angry at Stolas for springing this on him, and he feels like Stolas is trying to discard him because of one dumb thing he just did. Stolas doesn't know how many times Blitz has been dropped before because of one fuckup. He doesn't get how close he's gotten to Blitz's past trauma. Meanwhile Blitz is trying to get Stolas to give him a second to figure shit out, to just stick with him and not expect him to have all the answers right away.

And when Stolas doesn't give him that, because he's convinced that Blitz is still unhappy and is now just trying to make this hurt as little as he can, Blitz retreats back into anger. Finally Stolas is discarding him just like he always knew he would eventually. Their relationship has been such a rollercoaster for both of them and he just needs a little time, dammit! So now this feels like just another case of someone throwing him away for not living up to their expectations.

Stolas can't hear him asking for time, though. All he sees is Blitz following him to curse him out, to yell about how shitty he is, just like Stella has always done. And Blitz is right!!! Stolas was so crushed by the initial rejection that he didn't give Blitz the space he needed to process things. Blitz wants to talk and yell and fight through things and get all the shit out there. But Stolas is so focused on holding himself together for just a little longer.

Stolas's biggest fear was that he'd trapped Blitz in their arrangement, and the way Blitz tries to ask for time and engagement unfortunately hits directly on that. Blitz is yelling that Stolas doesn't get to just dismiss him, he deserves a chance to be heard and to figure shit out, and to have an actual conversation about this. But Stolas fixates on Blitz’s accusation that he's treating him like a servant, and assumes that he's referring to their entire relationship. It confirms, in his mind, that Blitz was never with him willingly and would never want to be with him willingly.

And it must hurt so much to hear Blitz call him a "pompous, rich asshole" in that moment, when he has been trying so hard to be selfless about this. He made himself so vulnerable with this confession and the gift of the crystal. He put everything he had out in the open. But if Blitz thinks he's an asshole, well, there's no way he could share his feelings, right? He's being vulnerable, and probably expected Blitz to do the same and lay his true feelings out there as well. And Blitz really is trying, but he's still using anger and insults because they're familiar and safe. PLUS there's the added panic of "Oh fuck, how badly did I hurt him that he thinks of me like this?"

Stolas doesn't know how many times Blitz has been abandoned for fucking something up, and Blitz doesn't know how many times Stolas has had to shut down and endure tirades of abuse he couldn't escape from. Stolas thinks he's done all of this and Blitz still can't see him as anything but a stuck-up, frigid jerk. And if this desperate, grand gesture wasn't enough to get Blitz to see how much he cares, well, what hope is there?

He's still reeling from what he perceived as Blitz’s mockery of the very idea that Stolas could care for him. He tried to leave peacefully but Blitz won't let him bow out, still wants to yell at him and tell him how shitty he is, won't even give him the dignity of breaking down in private. Never mind that those weren't Blitz’s intentions at all. Stolas was so scared, so tentative about this, that Blitz’s almost inevitable incredulous/messy reaction was bound to hurt.

Both of them are working off their own assumptions, their low opinions of themselves, and their past traumas, and can't see enough of each other's histories to understand that's what they're doing.

#blitzø #stolitz #stolas goetia #helluva boss spoilers #helluva boss the full moon #helluva boss meta

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nekropsii · 2 days

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what do you see in equius ?? genuine question i don't mean to sound rude but to me she's just really offputting. she gives me such creep vibes that i can't seem to get over and every time i read a page with her it just gets worse..... like when i first read nep & eq's chats i was sitting there wondering if this was outright abuse or at least bullying of some kind??? it felt like it idk.......

but honestly i do wanna see an equius liker's opinion on him because i can't understand it like at all and i'm probably just missing something that all the equius likers saw and i didnt LMAO

Well, considering I’m an Alpha Trolls Enthusiast and have been for, like, a decade, as well as having Horror as a Special Interest since age… What, 3? I’d say I personally have a pretty strong stomach for Weird and Offputting in fiction, lol. Stronger than most. Equius isn’t a very palatable character at all, I’ll be the first to admit that - a lot of the characters I enjoy the most in Homestuck aren’t very palatable… But I find ‘em real interesting, personally. The fact that they aren’t palatable adds to the intrigue for me, and poor execution tends to be a total weakness of mine. Again, Alpha Trolls Enthusiast for a decade straight.

I have a post here that talks a bit about my reading of Equius, I’d recommend giving it a read. I see Eridan and Equius as being very similar characters - not necessarily due to their shared hemoloyalty, but because they’re both teens falling down online pipelines. They’re very prevalent Kinds Of Guy that no one wants to talk about.

But people talk about Eridan plenty even to this day - he was even a fandom favorite for a while, being the fandom’s first Prettyboy Sad Gay Anime Prince long before Dirk… So he doesn’t reel in as much interest for me as the chronically overlooked Equius.

If there’s anything to know about me, it’s that I love a good underdog.

Equius-Likers, from my experience, are very aware of his issues. It’s part of the draw. Enjoyment of him tends to be an analytical fixation. I haven’t met a single Equius-Liker that hasn’t had some very complex thoughts on him. They’re just kinda quiet about it. Fitting.

Unfortunately, I’m Aranea But Real, so. No quietness here.

Your response to Equius is valid. It’s also intended, I feel. To specifically address the bits about concerns of his relationship with Nepeta not being healthy… I mean, it’s not abusive, but it’s definitely more complicated than fan art would lead you to believe, as always. “Complicated” is to be expected from a Moirallegiance - remember what they exist for?

Nepeta is very much so in control of the things going on, and their relationship is pretty equal, all things considered, so I wouldn’t be worrying too much about that. She very distinctly does not lack agency here - Nepeta is the one who has a leash on Equius, not the other way around. Equius is mean, because that’s the way she is to… Everyone, more or less, but she’s not of any danger to Nepeta. They have a fine Moirallegiance. 1,000% more functional than whatever the fuck Karkat and Gamzee had going on.

Anyway. I think Equius is neat, and has both missed and oft overlooked potential. One of the very few characters I’d be 100% down to have seen more content of in the comic.

Once again, check out this post. I still think it’s decent. Maybe you will, too.

#also there’s a big difference between ‘Equius fan’ and ‘Meowrails fan’. i am very specifically referring to Equius fans. you understand.#homestuck #beta trolls #equius zahhak #eridan ampora #nepeta leijon #cw abuse #<== mentioned #meowrails.ship #equius.pdf #nepeta.pdf #nekro.pdf #nekro.sms

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iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia · 1 day

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Sending my request once again! (I think, don't rlly remember 😰) Full hc about the M6 with a MC in a coma?

The Arcana HCs: When MC falls into a coma

~ don't know if this is what you were going for but it turned into a sleeping beauty situation XD hope you enjoy! - brainrot ~

-- to set the scene --

It was an overcast day. The air had been unusually still ever since your lover had stepped out after breakfast to start their day, and you'd found your own set of tasks to be oddly uneventful ... and lonely. It's why, when an elderly grandfather hobbles by and offers you a warm bread roll, you don't hesitate to take a bite as soon as you've waved goodbye. You don't take a second.

Julian

He's had a long day at the clinic, and as short as his commute is, he still feels like he's been a hundred miles away from you as he heads over after sunset. He's missed you all day

He's sure he forgets how to breathe when he walks in to see you collapsed on the floor. He knows what corpses look like, he can tell you aren't dead, but that's little comfort when you don't wake up

Carrying you to bed and working feverishly to narrow down all the possibilities. You're not injured, you're not sick, your vitals seem to fine, but ... you don't wake up. Even smelling salts don't do it

Spends the next three days refusing to leave your side except to fetch more help or resources. The whole community helps him

Mazelinka brings soup, Portia and Nadia stop by with some rare medicines, Asra pops in at all odd hours with new spells to try, and even Barth sends a hot meal or two over from the Rowdy Raven

Julian doesn't leave until he gets a call in the middle of the night. A nearby neighbor has gone into labor, and needs attention until the midwife can arrive from across town

He kisses your hand goodbye on his way out and is too busy hustling out the door to hear you stir. His shout when he gets home several hours later to see you reading wakes half the city

Asra

They'd spent the morning out running errands and the afternoon catching up with their parents. It's been busy and interesting and they're excited to show you what they got you in the market

Except all of that goes tumbling out of his grasp when he walks in to find you collapsed behind the counter, unresponsive

Somehow they manage to get you upstairs and in bed through the daze, and then they get ready to work through the night

He does notice the partially-eaten bread roll and can tell there's some sort of powerful magic in it, but unraveling what it is proves harder than he expects. The next 24 hours blur by in a haze

At some point, Faust goes off to find Chimes and Flamel and Aisha and Salim appear at the back door to help out. When they see Asra's state, they urge them to get some rest while they take over

He makes up a layer of blankets on the floor next to you to sleep, not wanting to disturb your condition, but it feels wrong to close his eyes without the usual goodnight kiss (at 5 PM)

They lean over to press a gentle peck between your eyebrows, and the sight of you beginning to twitch awake makes them freeze in place. It might be too good to be true

And that's how you wake up, to an exhausted Asra collapsing onto your chest

Nadia

Horrified. She's already blaming herself for being too busy to check in on you earlier, you seemed fine this morning, but here you are in one of the entrance's side rooms collapsed since goodness knows

A quick check with the guards confirms they saw you speaking with a stooped old man at the gates just that afternoon - and the roll they saw him give to you is next to you on the floor

To say that she distracts herself from her pain by leaving you to the healthcare professionals and trying to make up for her negligence by hunting down your poisoner would be an understatement

She's a woman on a mission. She'll leave Chandra in your chambers to bring her any updates and start her investigation immediately

Can't really bring herself to be with you for too long when she believes it's her fault. It's two weeks before she sits down next to you to see how you're doing, after doctors suggested she talk

It's hard. She takes your hand in hers and stares at your motionless face, and all she's able to do is tell you everything she's done so far to find the old man as though it'll earn her your presence again

Only after that, as the sun starts to set and she runs out of things to say, does she lean down whisper her love into your ear and press a kiss to your cheek. The surprised "eep!" when you wake up is priceless

Muriel

Panics as soon as gets in, because his mind is already jumping to the worst possible conclusions about what he's seeing

Are you dead? Are you hurt? Were you attacked? Did a rogue wild animal make its way in and maul you? Did Lucio come back? Did the Devil come back? He should've kept you safe -

It's Inanna's insistent whining and nudging that gets him to carry you to the bed from where he's gathered you up. It's hard to check for your pulse when his hand won't stop shaking

Whatever's going on, it doesn't take long for him to realize that you're okay. You're okay, you're just ... asleep. And not waking up

He'll try taking a nap on the floor next to you until you do

It's as the next day drags on that he starts to worry that you might not be getting enough food or water. He still doesn't know if this warrants calling Julian (he'd rather not) but you need hydration

Thankfully he's kissed you plenty of times before, so it's not too nerve-wracking a task for him to take a sip of fresh spring water before pressing his mouth to yours and trying to help you drink

You didn't expect to wake up like this

Normally Muriel would be a little more grossed out about having water coughed all over his face, but he's too happy to care

Portia

If she walks into a room and sees you collapsed, she's screaming

She's screaming loud enough to be heard from the Palace, and then she's rushing towards and nearly sobbing in relief when your skin is warm and your chest is still moving steadily up and down

She doesn't know why you collapsed or what's wrong with you (if it's something she can't see, then she doesn't want to mess it up) so she avoids moving you until she has someone around to help

Ilya. She needs Ilya, and Mazelinka, and Nadia, and Asra too, and maybe all the names ending in "a"s if it'll help her figure out how to help you any sooner. She'll get you through this. It'll be okay

Between Nadia spotting the bread roll, Julian confirming that there isn't an obvious medical reason, and Asra and Mazelinka's combined magical food knowledge, it's obvious what happened

The delightful thing about a woman like Portia is that she doesn't like stopping to be sad when she knows there's still hope to work towards. Nobody knows the spell? Trial and error!

"True love's kiss" is the third thing on the list after failing to enter your dreams and dripping soup into your mouth. Waking up to Portia smugly telling her older brother that all those "fairy tales" were onto something after all is an unforgettable experience

Lucio

All he knows is that one moment, he was triumphantly announcing his return and very pleased with himself about completing a shopping trip that involved only wise spending choices

And the next moment, every wise spending choice was clattering to the floor because you weren't moving

He's been on enough battlefields to know the difference between wounded and dead, but you don't seem to be either

The worst part is, you're not waking up. No matter what he does, you don't wake up. He's seen this before - he remembers watching as a vengeful ghost as his ex-wife lay motionless for three years

Is that how long this is going to take? Three years? He's not worried about his loyalty, he'll find a place that'll take care of you while he picks up whatever jobs he needs to keep you afloat, but

What if he makes another "oopsie" and you're not there to help?

It all overwhelms him to the point that he lays his head down on your stomach to have a little moment to himself, and he turns his face against your shirt to catch any ... eye water

Apparently mouthing "I love you" against your belly button counts, because the next thing he knows you're lifting your head and asking what's wrong. He's not touching a bread roll again

#ask arcana brainrot #the arcana #the arcana headcanons #the arcana hc #the arcana game #asra the arcana #julian the arcana #nadia the arcana #muriel the arcana #portia the arcana #lucio the arcana #asra alnazar #julian devorak #nadia satrinava #muriel of the kokhuri #portia devorak #lucio morgasson

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topgunruinedme · 1 day

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I Got Dreams But I Can't Make Myself Believe Them

Word count: 7.5k

Parings: Rooster & Maverick, Rooster & Iceman, Iceman/Maverick

Summery:

'Hey it’s Mav, leave a message. And no Ice whatever they’re accusing me of, I didn’t do-' He jabbed his finger on the screen again. Tears in his eyes. It couldn’t end like this. It just couldn't...please... It rang. Once Twice- “Hello?”

His face hurt. Pulsing with a vigour that he knew he should take his pain med and yet…he hadn’t. Because he deserved this pain. He deserved this.

This aching, the dagger-like sensation deep in the muscle when he tried to move. Still, it was not even close to a fraction of what he made them feel. So, he deserved this.

The pain. The punishment. They always did tell him he was a masochist. Fretting over his father being gone, whether Mav missed him, why he didn’t miss him. Worried about his mother's health, if they would lose the house, why wasn’t she smiling anymore. Would Mav stay or would he leave him without his favorite Bradshaw's; after all Mav wasn’t his babysitter. Was he going to be stuck alone in this world struggling to finish high school with the crushing debt of his mother's hospital bills and house lines that he discovered showed under her bed two days after the funeral. Was he going to die hungry or cold? And his newest one, would anyone care if he burnt in?

At least he had an answer to the last one. No. It was so painfully clear now, he had pushed too far and they had given up on him. The phone calls and messages left unanswered, the lettered read tearfully and shoved in a box under his bed that stayed with him religiously through deployments. The Admirals who bumped into him occasionally in deployments which he knew was their way of checking on his health after all files can only offer so much.

Yet…no one had come when he called. When he had laid on that hospital bed terrified out of his mind, cold, bloodied and half the mind that either he was Nick Bradshaw or he was seeing him. And no one, had come.

His NOK. His dad. He called.

No one.

No one cared anymore.

He remembered the nurses holding him down as he screamed out in short panic bursts as what he now knew were cold induced hallucinations raged through him. He remembered managing to grab a nurse's arm and begged them to call his father. Begged. Over and over again, demanding she keep trying until they sedated him somewhere between the forth redial.

No one came.

His dad didn’t care anymore.

He had gone too far and they had given up on him.

He pressed his face into the tattered plushy pushing down the whine of pain as it agitated the stitches on his chin tugging at the cuts. He curled around the soft toy in the limp bunk at his base housing trying to breathe through the pain. Wheezing as the position put a strain on his already sore ribs, bruised but thankfully not broken, but there was only so much they could do about the bruising caused by the harness. They marked up his chest, around his shoulders and down his back, making him look like a mummy who went through a fight and became a kickboxing victim. They weren’t pretty overall. He certainly wasn’t going to be winning any medals any time soon.

It was strange what near death situations did to a person. Twelve hours ago he was filled with such hurt, such hatred towards Maverick's actions, not him as a person but hurt about how he went behind his back and stopped him from succeeding…he just couldn’t see why they couldn’t have talked about it. Now. After spending all those hours alone trapped in a hospital wing, half aware of reality, strapped down to his cot like some dangerous criminal. All he wanted was to hold his father's hand. All he wanted was to go home.

But the question stood, did he even have a home to go back to now?

He remembered the crokard post box from that time Mav had tried to teach him to drive and he accidentally mixed up his accelerator and brake. But despite the years, Ice never fixed it. Maybe he was also a sucker for memories.

He remembered Ice’s fond smile as he helped apply the coloured paint to his hands after he insisted on putting their handprints on the mailbox after watching the new Disney movie UP. Ice had simply shaken his head, dug out some paints from one of Maverick's abandoned side projects and let himself be dragged out to the front lawn laughing all the way.

He remembered the loose and wobbly handrail to the stairs in the hallway that always made Ice sigh and roll his eyes anytime he heard it creak, yet he never got it fixed even when Ron apologized for being too careless while roughhousing with Wolf and offered to fix it himself.

He remembered the way Maverick would be waiting for him in the kitchen every morning before school. Chiding him to get dressed as he snagged a piece of bacon from the pan while Ice wasn’t looking only to complain that it was hot, when he himself was bare chested new and faded marks across his chest with low sweatpants on his hips, bed hair wild around his head.

The way every Thursday without fail their house would be filled with his uncles, spread out around their living room in various stages of a food coma, gorging themselves on the sweets Mav would spend all morning making with a pleased smile. He always had been his happiest providing for other people, seeing they were happy.

He remembered the board game night, the nights they would spend curled up on the couch together with some nonsense show that no one was really watching, and the nights they sometimes spent out watching the stars.

He remembered them cheering at his little league games despite being tired from a long day at work or having just returned from a deployment, which he now knew they would have been dead on their feet just wishing for a bed. He remembered their concern muttering when he was sick and their fingers through his hair. He remembered Ice’s mother's lullaby that the man would hold him through the wee hours of the morning and hum under his breath when they thought he was asleep.

He wanted to go home, he wanted it all. But he had lost it all when he cut off contact. And he was half terrified that they were angry at him, every time he sat there and thought about calling, about turning up on their doorstep to ask for forgiveness he would just stare at the number of missed calls, he would think about the hundreds of voice messages. He’d feel the burning of the box of letters all unanswered under his bed as he laid down and hugged his goose plushier that they had given him all those years ago. No doubt abusing Ice's powers to discover his address when he heard that he was in hospital in his junior year of university. The seams were now ratty from how often he ran his fingers over them, the fur carefully taken care of but despite his efforts the old plushie was dying, and unlike everything else in his life it was leaving him too. He could no longer preserve the memories within it.

He bit his lip only for the sharp pain that shot through his head to remind him why he shouldn’t do that. He winced, not from the way the fur rubbed up against the fresh stitches, although it wasn’t comfortable, but over the fact that Maverick was right. His heart jumped in his throat. He wasn’t ready.

Because Maverick had almost just lost him like he had lost Goose.

He had been reckless, and arrogant; he had been a kid thrown into a jet and told he was good, his ego was inflated and he hadn’t been ready.

And he had fallen out of the sky. He had burned in. And he was damn lucky he didn't take anyone else out in the process.

He had paid his price, and it had almost been his own head.

A few more seconds… the doctor's words ran through his head like a gunshot echo, warning him of the tragedy that could have occurred.

What will you tell their parents when they don’t come back? When they come back in a casket. What excuse will be ready then Lieutenant… His commanding officer lecture piggybacking from his nightmares, what excuse will be acceptable then?

There wasn’t one. This was his fault, his own failure. What would they have told them if he died?

You have my condolences Mr Kazansky, Mr Mitchell. However, your son has died in a training accident - having not even made it out of Top Gun - by his own stupidity!

Yeah, he could see that going over well.

He ran his thumb over the screen of his phone nervously, should he call? He had called- the hospital had called. But maybe they don’t answer unknown numbers, old people were like that… right? His fingers felt clammy as he took a shaky breath, whining quietly as he thumbed through his contacts to find the right number and listened to the phone ring quietly.

Once.

Twice.

Three times.

Each ring felt like a bullet in the chamber, he could hear tone ringing out around him as tears welled in his eyes, a sob building in his chest as the phone clicked, the call unanswered.

Too close, switching to guns.

'Hey it’s Mav, leave a message. And no Ice whatever they’re accusing me of, I didn’t do-'

He jabbed his finger on the screen again. Tears in his eyes. It couldn’t end like this. It just couldn’t…please…

It rang.

Once

Twice-

“Hello?” A croaky voice answered, indubitably not Mav.

"Ice?" His voice shook, "Pops?"

“Shit ” . Something rustled loudly over the phone and he could almost see Ice scrambling to sit up on the bed. A bitten out swear carried lowly over the line and it almost made him smile as he heard something clatter to the ground with a thud, no doubt the older man knocking something off the bedside table in his haste to grab his glasses and slide them on his nose to look at the phone. “Bradley?”

He sounded so hesitant as if he was afraid he was hearing things. It pained him to wonder how often his Pops had woken in the middle of the night hearing his voice and wondering if it was real or a sleep deprived hallucination. How often it left his Pops laying in his bed curled up with his hands over his ears trying to ignore his imaginary self calling for him for help, and not being able to help the man come back to earth. How many times had his Pops suffered silently and alone and he hadn't even known about it.

“Pops” he sobbed, chest aching from the force of his whine and the pang of his heart at the thought of how many times he had been the reason for his parents to cry, the cause of his parent's pain over the years.

“Bradley baby. What's wrong? Come on baby bird, I need you to speak to me”. Ice’s familiar level tone sounded unusually anxious, “Come on daring, you can do it. Take some deep breaths for me”.

He hadn't even realized that his panic induced sobs had pushed him into the dangers of hyperventilation. His gaps of breath between his chest shaking sobs became shorter and more panicked as he acknowledged the lack of oxygen.

“Breath,” Ice pleaded. “Baby please”.

“He didn’t answer” he gasped out, whimpering “He wasn’t there ”

“Bradley, honey what-?”

He could hear Ice’s underlying confusion as he whined in pain hissing behind gritted teeth as he burrowed his face further into the soft teddy irritating his stitched cuts. “Mav” he whined, his voice muffled as he pressed it further into the soft fabric, ashamed of his clingy neediness for his parents despite being 25. The mortification of crying out to them over a little crash. He felt like a kid creeping into his parent's rooms during the night after a nightmare, sweat still clinging to his brow, stomach rebelling as he hovered by their bedside unsure whether to wake them or not. But despite the early hour they had always opened their arms to him, shifted and made room for him between them on the bed. Always. Maybe…after all this time, just maybe Ice could spare a little room to allow him a few moments to recuperate and shuffled away in shame.

Realistically he knew that Ice couldn’t see him. He knew that Ice wouldn't care, that the man would simply look at him with pursed lips, his brows furrowed in concern and coo quietly as he gathered him in his arms, careful to guide his face over his shoulder to prevent him from aggravating his wounds further. Despite what many people thought Ice had been more of the mother hen type than Maverick. Mav had been the cool uncle, then he became the serious dad he needed to be but Ice, Ice had been the cool dad. Ice had been the one to take on his missing mother role, the man had melted into it without blinking. Always making sure that someone was there to kiss his brow and tuck him in at night. Who made him breakfast in the morning and took time out of their day to help him with homework when Mav got sick of trying to help him and stomped off frustrated. He was the person who would stand on the guidelines of his games with a cooler of drinks and bulled him into letting him apply sunscreen while he ate the sandwich he had been prepared for lunch while Mav got into an argument with the couch. Ice was the one who would smile at him empathetically holding him when he cried over a crush. Who gave him his talk and he was always there a hand away to allow him to crawl into his lap no matter how old he got to comfort him.

Mav may have been his dad. But Ice had been his Mum, his Pops. He knew that Mav loved him in his own way, but he also knew that he was partly there for his guilty hand in his father's death. He also knew that Mav had promised Carole he would be there for him (Hospital walls are not as soundproof as you think Mav), that he would take his Godfather duties seriously. Whereas Ice, he never had to stay. He knew they were wingmen and they tackled problems together but Ice never made him feel like a problem. He always made sure he was included, he never pushed him. Ice never has to stay, and while the man harboured his own guilt over Nick, he never pushed it, never brought it up. They spent his memory day sitting on the patio in the backyard and drank Kool-Aid with him silently. Ice didn't have to step in but he did, he didn't have to stay but he chose to.

He didn't think he could have a mum again after Carole but he did. And that was partly the reason he couldn't bring himself to hang up. Because despite his shame, the agony of his embarrassment and fury at Mav. Cutting Ice out had been the hardest decision of his life and now hearing the man's voice he couldn't find the strength to hang up. Not when he was so close, his smooth voice in his ear begging him to stay.

“Baby” Ice cooed in concern, it was soft and familiar. It reminded him of the warm feeling of home, the same tone Ice would use as he sat on the edge of his bed letting him climb onto the man's lap clinging to him when his mother was in hospital, not caring that he was far too old to be doing so. He could almost see the soft frown and those gentle eyes staring down at him, and feel the carding of the man’s fingers through his curls. “Baby, are you looking for Mav? He’s out at the hangar tonight. The idiot forgot his phone. I promise he didn’t ignore it on purpose sweetheart-“

“The hospital called” he choked out “I know. I begged them too”.

“Hospital?” Ice sounded alarmed “Bradley-“

“I asked them to call and he didn’t come ”.

“Bradley Bradshaw”. The soft tone shifted to a firm disciplining one, one he didn't often hear coming from Ice’s lips. It was rare to see him step up into the role of the displeased parent, but that didn't mean it hadn’t happened. Like when the man crossed his arms across his chest with pursed lips and a disapproving look when he caught him sneaking into the house at the early hours of the morning when he had been specifically grounded, or when he went drinking for the first time while underage or when the older man had caught him clumsy stubbing out a weed join on his windowsill eyes wide in alarm. This doesn't sound like Ice was disciplining him, no it sounded panicked as if Ice was trying to hold himself together and keep himself from panicking him further when his breathing had just started to slow to a reasonable speed.

“Bradley baby, why were you in the hospital? Are you ok? God- please be ok” Ice sounded desperate. And for a moment it warmed his chest, the next it made his stomach clench uncomfortably.

He had always taken Ice’s compassion for granted and he had used it against Mav more times than he could count to get what he wanted. He had been a spoiled brat and at the time he hadn't cared about what it would do to the two wingmen. And the worst part about it was that while Ice picked up on it he never made him stop even when it led to the two wingmen arguing or sleeping at different houses. But he always came back. It made him feel sick because fuck Ice really did care about him and he still cared about him. Even after he threw him to the curb, after he chewed him out, cutting away their bond and years of love with a rusty knife in hopes it would rot away and get infected. Even after he ignored every call, deleted every message and refused to read the letters and cards the man sent. Even after that horrid ceremony; after he so blankly disregarded Ice’s rank and achievements in front of everyone . Ice had still stuck by his side. Because despite his 7 year long temper tantrum, Ice had stuck by him faithfully. He had respected his wishes and avoided getting the same posting as him, doing his maternal duty to send him away if he was anywhere close to them even if he couldn't prevent himself from sending someone to check up on him occasionally to settle his worry. Even if he couldn't prevent himself from sending cards, or from sending him letters each deployment knowing he wouldn't read them just to remind him that someone would care if he burnt in.

“Today was hop 31” he whispered out with a croak, the demons that accompanied the words settled on both of them, however, there was an unusual heaviness to his. As if more weight had been added on in an attempt to make his knees buckle and maybe there ha d. Every time he closed his eyes it was no longer the spinning of the Pacific ocean around him as he was strapped into the jet, he no longer heard his dad's voices calling out in a panic, he didn't hear the sound of his father's neck snapping against the canopy or the rough tug of air as it detached. Now he heard the panicked voice of his wingman. He heard Hangman scream out of him “Roosters heading out to sea! I repeat Roosters going out to sea! Permission to follow-” “Denied Lieutenant''. He now saw the stomach clenching sight of mountains dropping around him as his jet dipped dangerously out of the training zone towards the sea where their adjective had been. It had been simple: fly through the terrain, don't get hit, and get back to base. Where had it gone wrong? When had Hangman’s taunts turned into fearful screams, when was the annoyed fighting turned into the sound of his jet screaming at him to pull up?

He let the line fall silent, taking a shaky breath trying to pull away from the shaking of the jet, the sharp tug of the G-force and the claustrophobic feeling of the canopy closing in on him as the piercing scream echoed in his head, his death sentence.

“Low Altitude, pull up. Low Altitude, pull up- ”.

He could hardly hear anything but if that was the gun cocking then it was Hangman's fearful cry that was the bullet, “Rooster-!”

He squeezed his eyes shut and instead let Ice do what he did best and allowed the man to gather his evidence and piece it together himself.

“I’m not Goose” he rasped out, barely, when the response took too long. Reminding the man of his hand in one of the worst mistakes of his life. But it was necessary as much as he hated it because he knew Ice, unlike Mav who blamed himself publicly not afraid to attempt to redeem himself for his hand in it, Ice suffered silently letting his mind run over the scenario looking for a way they could have saved Goose, looking for a scenario that didn't exist. Ice loves to torture himself, and like him, Ice was a masochist. “It was fine. I was on my way in and an engine blew. I couldn’t- I went into a flat spin and collided with the ocean” he continued and let out a humorous snort “I burnt in Pops”.

“Christ kid”, Ice's voice sounded suspiciously wet.

“I’m ok” he mumbled, “I wanted you there.” He tugged the plushy tighter to his chest, closing his eyes as he listened to Ice shift the sheets and audibly stood up from the bed hearing the man mutter to himself quietly as he began to move around the house. There was the recognizable creak of his childhood stairs then a door shut and the phone clicked falling into a vain eerie silence. Had- Had he been wrong? He bit his lip shoving down a sob, his lips wobbled, his eyes squeezing shut.

Had Pops- he hadn’t hung up had he? He wouldn’t leave him, right?

Pops loved him…he wouldn't leave him. He wouldn’t, but he wouldn't blame the man if he had. It’s not like he had done anything to instil confidence into the older gentleman. He had brushed him off, thrown his offers back into his face, disgraced the man's title in front of the brass and thrown more venom at the man in the last 7 years than he had shown love.

He let out a wounded noise sob ripped from his lips, teeth chattering as his chest tightened. Ignoring the taste of blood in his mouth as he curled around the plush, squeezing it so tightly it made his shoulders ache and wrist click in protest. No longer making a conscious effort to keep the blood from smearing on the white fabric.

“Bradley?”

His breath hitched eyes, snapping open, tilting his head back to look at the phone that had fallen from his grip to rest on the mattress to his left as he curled onto his side, the line was still connected.

Ice's worried voice wobbled through the line. “Baby bird can you hear me?”

“Pops! You- you-“

“Deep breaths honey” Ice reminded him gently.

“You didn’t leave ” .

“Never” Pops promised firmly. “I’m sorry darling I should have warned you, I forgot there was a lag when the phone connected to the car”.

He blinked and swallowed thickly, reaching up to rub the thick tears from his face sniffing snotty with a grimace as he used his sleeve to rub the evidence from his skin,. His voice clouded with tears as his still scattered brain tried to process the information “Car?”. His head was still pounding and the impromptu crying was not helping in the slightest but the nurse had told him he would be sluggish for the next few days until he healed, then again she had also told him to avoid phones and screens for the next 72 hours. Of anything it was their own fault for allowing him to talk his way out of having a supervisor to watch his every move. Telling him not to use a screen was like telling a pilot he couldn't fly when the new F-25 was sitting right in front of him.

He was going to do it. He would do anything he had to at this point to hear his Pop’s voice, even if he had to fly to DC and burst into his office himself- that is if they are still posted there. But no, he remembered the creaking of the stairs, the sound was seared into his brain. They had to be down in Miramar, they had to be…right?

That was home. They wouldn’t change that.

“Yes sweetheart, we’re going to go find that idiot of a father of yours” Ice chuckled fondly.

“Why-“ he stuttered hesitating as he worried the words around in his brain for a moment before finally dragging the dreaded question he's been worrying about since he stomped out of their lives 7 years ago from his lips, “Why isn’t he with you? Did I-''. Had they separated because of him? Why weren’t they living in the same house, they had lived together for as long as he could remember, they all had.

“No Bradley. You didn’t do anything. He’s just at the hanger, said he needed to do some work on his baby” Ice soothed apparently knowing him too well, perhaps it was a leftover skill from having to learn how to predict his mood swings as a teenager but Ice had always had the knack of knowing what he needed in the moment. He had been so sure on more than one occasion that the man could secretly read minds, but maybe he just knew his thought patterns too well.

He frowned in confusion, “He has a hanger? Like…his own?”

“I was not impressed” Ice huffed in assurance with a heavy put on sigh “If anything he certainly topped the retriever incident, I think he was trying to win some obscure challenge. Then again I wouldn't mind so much if he was actually home more and cared for it”.

“Retriever?”. His stomach clenched as he blinked away tears as he listened to Ice smile fondly as he recounted his wingman's antics. He bit his lip subconsciously. How much had he thrown away?

Listening to the fact that their lives continued on without him hurt but deep down he knew he hadn't really expected the world to stop spinning. He hadn’t expected for them to stop living their lives just because he had left, but to hear confirmation that they moved on, just as he had…it hurt.

How much had he missed?

“I came home from a meeting a couple of months ago and Slider was supposed to be watching him but apparently he got distracted ”. He let out a wet laugh as Ice drawled in an unimpressed tone. A woman then, they had always been Uncle Si's weakness. One he had seen the others exploit many times to win bets or escape babysitting duties. It was almost a game within the group, or at least it used to be. He could almost hear an Ice smile behind his grouchy tone “Anyway I got back and there’s Mav, dozing away on our couch with a baby golden retriever on his chest. She’s the cutest little thing” Ice cooed only to fall into a brief moment of awkward silence when neither men knew what to say before Ice broke it gently, “We named her Rooster”.

He felt like he was going to be sick. Even after all this time, after all he put them through they still wanted him just as much as he did.

“Pops,” he cried wetly.

“I'm here baby bird” his Pops promised “Now. Tell me about what you’ve been up to in the last few years since we’ve seen you”.

“You're an Admiral, shouldn’t you already know that? I know you help keep Mav updated” The tone wasn’t accusingly just…tired.

“I do,” Ice said quietly, not bothering to do anything to hide his involvement, “But I want to hear it from you”.

So he told him. He started by explaining how he had driven to the edge of town and checked into a motel after he stormed out of the house, how despite having sent Mav away with his tail between his legs he couldn't stand staying in that house anymore knowing Ice would come home and convince him to stay. So he did what he did best, he fled. He told him about how he called up admissions to California University and reversed his refusal; one of the conditions of a bet he lost to Slider a few years ago that he would apply to the same university that his uncle had graduated from, at the time it hadn't meant anything to him a mere joke. He explained that the university had been surprisingly accommodating once he spun a tale about a Navy relocation that was changed last minute allowing him to attend the university, a lie that Ice lowly chastised him for over the line. How he packed up his limited belongings that night with only his broncho, a few hundred dollars in his account and a quickly put together duffle to his name and left that night to drive all the to California. Driving from dawn to dusk trying to sober up from his 7 hour drive huddled up against the window of a coffee at 5am in the morning curled around a cup of coffee trying to stay awake long enough to get his keys from the rental company and crash into the first empty bed he saw.

He laughed about how he met Jackson for the first time. How his roommate had been allegedly studying at his desk reading through the textbook for their economics and aerodynamic classes when the door of their dorm opened, but before he could greet him apparently he had chucked his bag, letting it fall to the ground and stumbled towards the only undressed bed in the room. Jackson had told him he looked like a zombie dragging himself around dead on his feet, bags under his eyes slurring as he muttered to himself, practically throwing himself halfway across the room at the chance of a wink of sleep, only to misjudge the distance and land half on the edge of the bed and roll off with a startled shout. Jackson had told him after laughing so hard he ended up tilting off his chair and joining him on the floor that he had just stared silently at the ceiling blinking slowly with a confused look as he registered falling off the bed.

He confessed how he spent that first night laying awake (of course that was after his frankly illegally long nap, if you could call it that) unable to sleep as he tapped his fingers against his phone that rested on his stomach, fully aware of the missed calls and messages from his uncles, his parents. But the burning need to respond just hadn't been enough to rival the flames of fury curling around his heart like barbed wire. He spent the whole of his first night conflicted, wondering if he should give up and change his mind and go home, that he should beg for Mav to tell him why he did this, why he wasn't good enough. Surely there was a reason, something he would fix to make Mav love him again. The memory of Mav recalling in on himself, jaw flexing as the words left his lips leaving a cold grip around his chest as Mav turned on his heels and walked out of the house.

Go away and never come back old man. I don’t want murderers in this house!

He told Ice about how he powered his phone off and got a burner phone for the first few months, unable to look at it with the burning anger that made him want to throw it at a wall hoping it would break. Knowing he wouldn't be able to resist the temptation to reach out if he saw the calls waiting for him. Knowing that he needed to do this, that he couldn't give in yet, that he needed to fight for this. For him.

He told him about how he got a job waiting tables at a nearby mum-and-pop dinner run by an elderly couple, who reminded him of frighteningly grandpa Viper. About how the older couple had stepped in and who took care of him when he was struggling. How they bullied him into staying after his shifts for dinner or pushed hot chocolate onto him and waved away his money when he tried to pay, and how inventive he had to get to hide his tips around for them to find, knowing they would pull his ear like Uncle Wood used to with an exacerbated fond look.

He relaxed back into the mattress smiling as he recounted his subjects and the people he met. Even going as far as to admit that he found most people his age immature and recounted some of the drama and frat initiation he had witnessed. He had never really gotten along with them, instead he chose to hang out with Jackson most days. Unlike him Jackson wasn't heading for the Navy, the man was instead aiming to work as a consultant for the Pentagon. The man loved aerodynamics but the man had admitted that flying made him queasy, and he very much preferred to keep his feet on the ground.

He whispered out the painful admission of returning home for the break not having the will to go anywhere else for the holidays only to book out a hotel room and hide out there afraid of running into any of them. He recounted the nights he had sent in the cold bundles up in his truck outside their house watching the lights go off, unable to take the step of actually knocking on the door. Trying to ignore Ice’s sharp inhale pained with the knowledge that he had been so close.

He talks about how Jackson and he lost contact after graduation both being busy with their new jobs as the man moved out to Texas and as he himself , moved to Annapolis after finding someone who allowed him to enlist and how he got accepted into the academy. He talked about how he was the oldest kid there and the prejudice he faced from the other recruits due to it. How he was dismissed by the teachers and scrutinized by instructors who urged him to find a new career that suited him better. About how he graduated second in his class only beaten by one person, Jake Seresin.

He discussed his frustration and rivalry that bloomed and continued through their deployments only to pop back up, like the leach he was because Seresin was a damn cockroach, as his competitor when he was accepted into Top Gun. How it was only due to a surprising friend from the academy popping back up, Natasha Trace, who kept him sane (and likely from being discharged from punching the man's perfect teeth in) and later became his best friend (one who was very unhappily to find out that they were being separated after graduation, she was being stationed out at Hawaii, hours away from his station in Japan). He talked about how close the points were, about how their rivalry seemed to fizzle out in the moment his jet tipped to the side unresponsive and the man cried out for him. How in that moment, the trophy didn't feel like it mattered anymore.

“They always did put too much focus on that damn trophy” Ice muttered, “The point of Top Gun used to be about being the best, as a team. Now… we’ve lost too much with the encouraged competitiveness”.

He hummed limply as the conversation fell into a sort of lull as he realized how long he had been talking, it was almost 1:23am, almost 2 hours since the call started. And Pops was still here, listening. Who had recognised his distress, and had woken up at an ungodly hour to go and drive out to wherever Mav had boarded himself up for the night simply because he needed him.

“Hey Pops”

“Yeah, kid?”

“I'm wearing your hoodie”. Part of him knew he should be embarrassed at the admission, he ran the cuff of the old faded grey hoodie between his fingers finding comfort in it even though he could no longer smell Ice’s expensive Italian cologne clinging to it. But he couldn't bring himself to be. Sitting comfortably on the centre of his chest covering his sternum was a dark blue and red image, a familiar image, a dark blue circle surrounding a white F-15, marking his chest with his destiny. The words that had been engraved in his mind long before he had ever set foot on the ground before him; United States Navy: Fighter Weapons School.

“Your Top Gun one”. It had given him a connection to them all, being so far away from them, wearing it was the only time he was able to scratch at the nauseating homesickness that rocked his whole being. It had given him a homestead, the name printed across his shoulder blades connecting him to his lineage and the bond connecting his family together.

Kazansky. Graduate of Class 1986, Top Gun.

“I know,” Ice said quietly, “I noticed it was missing not long after you left. You know…there's a photo of you in it up on Penny's bar, at the Hard Deck” Ice corrected before chuckling lightly, “You've grown into it well, I remember when you were a scrawny kid and it just dwarfed you but you refused to wear anything else”.

“I used to take it when you were deployed,” he swallowed, “It was stupid but it made me think that you would come back for it”.

“Brad's,” Ice sounded wretched, “It was never the hoodie I came back for, it was you”.

“I know. I know that now. But…it reminds me that maybe one day…you'll come home again”.

“Bradley-”

“How is everyone” he interrupted sniffing and swallowed down his regret. There was a pause, clearly Ice contemplating chasing up the chain of thought before the man sighed reluctantly submitting to the change of subject.

“Well, you have two new nieces and nephews. Wolf and Wood adopted a little boy three years ago, and Sunny's wife had a surprise kid a few years ago while he was out on deployment, surprising them both” Ice commented dully.

He frowned in confusion, “But I thought Anna was infertile?”

“So did we” Ice hummed but slowly allowed them to fall into the comfortable lull of the conversation as Ice updated him slowly with everything he missed, careful to add in details he thought were pertinent; like Slider retiring from being an Admiral and becoming a commercial pilot, apparently the man was much happier now. Or Wood and Sunny who had co-opened a bakery and coffee store that they had named ‘the smiley shorts’ which honestly didn't surprise him as much as it should have. Or about how Cougar was working in a hospital under his wife who had been promoted to the chief of surgery. And slowly he started to mend a little more.

“Bradley baby, you still with me?”

He blinked tiredly not realizing that he had closed his eyes at some point, he tried to shake sleep from his limbs as it attempted to claim him. He yawned, jaw cracking in the effort as he rolled onto his back tilting his head back towards the phone where it sat on the mattress next to his head. “Pops, right here” he mutters in confirmation, “On your wing”.

“That's right baby bird” Ice let out a small chuckle “Right on my wing. Talking about wingmen. We’re about to find one”.

“Mav?”

“Yeah, darling”. The engine spluttered in the background, and he heard the keys jingle as Ice muttered lowly ‘It's too damn cold for this’ . He listened trying to picture where Ice was as he heard a door opened then the crunch of dirt under boots. He frowned, brows pulling tensely as he tried to picture a desert, or somewhere with a vast amount of land that would allow Mav his solitude but was dry enough to crunch this time of year. He jolted slightly in confusion at the sound of old metal banging against something with a clatter and the loud noise of something heavy rolling.

He almost wept hearing a tired confused voice, “Ice? Honey what are you doing here? It’s almost 3 am”. Mav sounded the same, that lovering concern that he had been on the receiving end of all those years ago and he could see the way Mavs eyes would be pinched in the corner, lips tilted down as he studied them for any injuries, trying to figure out what had happened before they could form a warped lie.

“I have someone who wants to talk to you”, this time he could see Ice's smile, the one that bloomed behind his closed eyelids, the small jump in his lips that bloomed into a gentle smile as the phone travelled hands.

“Uh-hello?” Mav asked, sleep still evident in his voice and he slivered at the flash of memories of seeing the man stumble into the kitchen wrapping his arms around Ice’s waist as he pressed a sloppy kiss to the man's check knowing he would swat him for it as he did every day with a grumble only to pair a cheeky grin to Ice’s unimpressed loom. How he would stay attached to Ice for the rest of breakfast swaying with him a step behind the blond seamlessly ducking out of the way without needing to be asked, passing along ingredients to distract Ice from the wondering fingers trying to snatch a piece of bacon front he pan before it was plated only to end up with a lecture and a wooden spoon to his hand. He remembered Mav’s pouting only for him to turn with a wink as he used to stick his tongue out to tease them.

“Dad?” His voice trembled faced the fact he was speaking to his father for the first time in just under a decade.

Mav hailed sharply, “Baby?” Mav sounded awake, startled by the concern that dragged into his voice. He sounded happy , shocked but happy.

“Dad” His heart slowed his chest aching but relieved as the sense of home finally settled over him.

Home.

“Bradley honey what’s wrong?” Mav asked worriedly.

“He said the hospital called you but you didn’t turn up” Ice rumbled in the background quietly allowing them to have their own moment, no doubt the man had led Mav to sit down holding him close, tugging him into his side.

He could go home.

“Shit, I didn’t have my phone- I didn’t realize until after I got here-”

“Dad,” he interrupted the man's panicked rambling with tears in his eyes as he looked down at the goose in his arms that had offered him so much comfort in the last few years but dispite the memories it carried, it was nothing to rival Mav’s hugs, or Ice’s kisses. It wasn't like curling up with Mav on the couch or being tucked in by Ice. It wasn't home.

“Yes, baby?”

He took a deep breath trying to push back the emotional overload that once again threatened to overtake him, that clung to him weighing him down in the ocean dragging him further underwater like a parachute filling with water with no tactical knife to free himself with forced to watch the rope tangle around his body trapping him as his body jolted at the lack of air. His voice trembled, breaking as the tears became evident in his voice, “Can I come home?”

“Of course, baby” Mav sounded choked up almost as if he was crying as well “God Bradley, of course, you can come home. You were always welcome home”.

And for the first time in years he took a deep breath and his heart felt weightless and he smiled and thought of home, only this time, it was closer than he thought.

#Title from 'Homesick' by Noah Kahan.#top gun fanfiction #top gun imagine #top gun fandom #top gun maverick #top gun headcanons #pete maverick mitchell #icemav #bradley rooster bradshaw #reunion #Rooster comes home #the mavdad and icepops of it all #mavdad #icepops

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missvelvetsstuff · 1 day

Text

No Benefits

Bucky x Reader

Summary: Reader and Bucky are best friends until a drunken hook up. Bucky wants a friends with benefits situation because he doesn't feel ready for a relationship but reader knows that will lead to a broken heart.

Then Sharon Carter comes to work with them.

Notes: Steve, Nat and Tony are around but retired, everything else is mostly canon

Chapter 9

Warnings: Swearing, angst

Bucky spent the next week the same way he spent the previous week, since Cookie left, seeing Dr Raynor every day and writing to Cookie after his sessions. Raynor had suggested it. Of course, she told him to bare his soul and dispose of the letters but he felt the need to finally reach out to Cookie. He needed to tell her the whole truth even if she had moved on with that rich guy in Boston.

So he wrote everything and mailed them to the new address that was listed for her on the SWORD employee directory. He wanted to go see her but didn't know if she wanted to see him so just kept writing and sending the letters, almost every day.

A couple of nights after she disappeared, Natasha showed up in Bucky's room in the middle of the night, waking him up as she sat on his groin. Before he could even think about anything he had her pinned to the wall with his vibranium hand around her throat. He kept her there as he shook the sleep off, his hand tight enough to hold her there but not so tight that she couldn't breathe or speak.

"Nat? What the Hell?"

She smirked "I was going to wake you up with a surprise." Licking her lips "Do you remember how much I loved the arm? This feels different than the titanium but not in a bad way." and moaning "Show me what it does, Soldat."

Bucky flinched at the name and pulled his hand away from her.

"No, Natalia, I don't want you. After everything that's happened I don't want anything to do with you. Why can't you understand?"

Nat snapped back "I was being controlled and manipulated too you know. Where's my forgiveness?"

Bucky shook his head "I know you were but you keep acting like you were before so I have to wonder how contrite you really are." He sighed "You need to get to medical. Sharon was checked out and that serum was still affecting her but the docs gave her something to counteract it and she's better now. You're still under some level of Antonia's control, don't you want to get out from under it?"

Nat rubbed up against him "Please, I'm fine. Besides Buck, we were good together before. Don't you remember?"

Bucky sighed "I remember two people in a completely fucked situation that needed some human companionship. That's all."

Nat tried to convince him, reaching out "But, Bucky-"

"No!" he grabbed her outstretched hand and didn't let go when she twisted around and kicked him in the gut. Instead he grabbed her ankle with his vibranium hand and pulled so she hit the floor, knocking the wind out of her, then sat on her straddling her hips and held both wrists.

Nat caught her breath before she realized the position they were in. She smirked and started to wiggle under him "This is definitely something I can work with."

Bucky quickly stood and pulled her up with him just as Sam showed up.

Sam smirked "Looks like the Wolf caught a spider. We can take her to a holding cell until Dr Cho gets here in the morning."

He held up some zip ties and after a short struggle they secured her wrists.

Nat started to squirm "Come on Barnes, let me go. I can't believe you would lock me up after all we've been through."

As he pushed her ahead of him Bucky scoffed "All we've been through is even more reason to lock you up."

He flinched when Nat kicked back and her heel hit his shin "Dammit Romanoff, knock it off. It's only till morning and Dr Cho will take care of you. Sharon had additional treatment and is back to normal."

When they arrived in the holding area Bucky cut the zip tie, pushed Nat into a holding cell, made sure the cell was properly secured and turned the lights off. "Sleep tight."

Nat started yelling and banging on the wall as they walked away which made Sam chuckle. Bucky sighed in relief knowing there was more work to do but getting Nat neutralized was a great start.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On Monday, Cookie was the topic of all the most interesting water cooler conversations but she tried to ignore it and get her work done.

Until Tyler knocked on her open office door.

Cookie looked up smiling "Good morning, Tyler. Come on in, have a seat. What can I do for you?"

Tyler looked grim as he stood over her "I'm sure you are aware of the current office gossip."

Cookie shrugged "Yes, I know but it's gossip. I don't pay it much mind."

Tyler glared at her "It's disruptive. You can't just run around doing whatever you want, you know. You don't have the Avengers to protect you here so better learn to behave appropriately on and off the clock."

Cookie stood to her full height and rolled her shoulders back before she spoke, looking straight in his eyes

"I'm only going to say this once, since my arrival here seems to have thrown you off of your groove. I don't report to you, you are not my boss and you have no seniority or rank over me. I don't need anyone to protect me because I'm the best at my job and I've done nothing wrong. I went to a book launch and was seen with the grandson of the author in question. Fully clothed, barely touching the entire time we were in public."

Tyler smirked "And in private? Drysdale has quite the reputation."

Cookie bristled "None of your goddamn business. That's why it's called private. If you can't control your staff then I'd be happy to offer some ideas in that regard but don't come in here trying to shame me for my legal actions in my personal time."

She sat back down and started going through her in-box for a couple of minutes before realizing he was still there.

She scoffed "Was there anything else? I have work to do."

Tyler's face flushed red, he shook his head and stomped away to his office.

Cookie sighed, so many men thinking they have power over women just because they were men. Fewer than before but still too many for her taste. She hoped Tyler would get the message and grow up.

Cookie went to the diner on the first floor for lunch with Annie, who insisted on all the details so she could live vicariously since her life was all marriage and a teething baby right now.

Annie sighed "How fun. Sounds like he really swept you off of your feet. When are you seeing him again?"

Cookie chuckled "Beats me. That wasn't the first chapter in an NC17 fairy tale, it was just two people having some fun, so I don't know if I'll ever see him again. I suppose the odds are good since we work a few buildings apart but I have nothing planned. He doesn't really seem like the prince charming type anyhow."

Annie frowned "Aawww, that's too bad seeing how he is rich and hot but his reputation does precede him. At least he was a good one nighter, I've had plenty that couldn't even be bothered to make me cum."

Cookie laughed out loud "I didn't know that was a problem with women partners."

Annie winked "I never said they were all women but some women are just as bad as some men."

"Well that's depressing."

Cookies alarm went off "That's time, back to the salt mines."

When they arrived back on their floor, there was a crowd by Cookies office and excited murmuring.

Annie stayed back by her desk to watch as Cookie worked her way through the crowd. "Alright folks, nothing to see, everyone back to work becau-" she stopped at the doorway to her office and her eyes grew wide when she saw him sitting at her desk "Oh, hey you" she smiled and rushed into his arms, shocking everyone who was watching.

Nick Fury smiled at her "I wanted to come check up on you before I go to the compound and kick some Avenger ass."

He glared at the people still gawking "Don't you people have some work to do?" and chuckled as they all scattered back to their desks.

Cookie grinned "You should have told me you were coming, I would have waited for you and we could have had lunch."

Nick shrugged "I don't know if anyone has told you but I'm the boss so do things when and how I like."

He closed her office door and they both sat.

"So I know what happened at the compound but why don't you tell me your version."

Cookie shrugged "Nothing really happened. I just realized how difficult seeing me around, reminding them of what they were forced to do, was for Bucky, Sharon and Nat. I didn't want to make their recovery any more difficult."

Nick sighed "What about you and your recovery? Your trauma started before Antonia kidnapped you. I know you and Barnes-"

Cookie shook her head "No, no. I don't want to go there. I'm fine recovering here."

Nick looked at her pointedly "I was going to say you and Barnes were good friends, not to mention Wilson. Now you're here in a new town, new office and separated from your friends. I don't think thats great for you.

I want you back at the compound, asap."

"No, Nick I just, I can't, I-"

Nick softened his tone "Look, not today or even tomorrow but this isn't a permanent move. Stay here a bit, get the analysts in line and please, please keep your boot on Tyler's neck as he has gotten too comfortable thinking he's top dog. But 6 months. A year tops and I want you home. If they have issues I'll deal with them." He looked at his watch and sighed "Speaking of, I need to go ream me some super heroes."

He kissed her on the cheek and left.

A couple of hours later when she went to get more coffee she saw Tyler glaring at her from his office. Jackass, she thought to herself as she gave him a cheery smile and wave. She saw him get up and felt him slam the door because it made the whole floor shake. She laughed all the way back to her desk.

When Cookie arrived home there was a stack of envelopes on the floor under the mail slot. She sighed, picked them up and sat down at the table to go through them. Most went to the trash but there were 3 plain white envelopes with the same writing and return address as the one from the night before.

She sighed and put them with the first letter Bucky sent here, unsure if she was ready to deal with that yet. She ordered Thai for dinner and went to take a quick shower before her food arrived.

Clean and dressed in pj's, Cookie sat on the couch with a glass of wine, a plate of food and the letters from Bucky next to it. She drank, ate and watched the news while regularly looking at the letters, trying to decide what to do about them.

On one hand she was curious about the contents. Especially because there were four now. Why would he write four times? What did he have to say that couldn't have been said in the first letter?

On the other hand, she was feeling more at peace than she had any time in the last, well however long since she slept with Bucky and wasn't sure she was ready to risk disturbing that peace yet.

Cookie knew that eventually she would need to deal with all of this. Bucky and her feelings for him, plus Nat and Sharon and that whole drama.

She finished her dinner then refilled her wine and grabbed a special brownie to help her sleep.

Eventually but not tonight.

@erelierraceala @capswife @ozwriterchick @cjand10 @wintrsoldrluvr @mrsbuckybarnes1917 @browneyedgrli @greatenthusiasttidalwave @hhiggs @dontworryboutitsweetheart-blog @behindmygreyeyes @pattiemac1 @calwitch @mrs-bucky-barnes-73 @ordelixx @blackhawkfanatic @casey1-2007 @scott-loki-barnes @selella @hiireadstuff @winterschildren8

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #james bucky barnes x reader #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes x you #angst with a happy ending #james bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x female reader #no benefits

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anonymouscheeses · 2 days

Text

Tw: themes of sa and alot of blood (Angel blood but still)

(Vent)

They won't believe me. I didn't even understand what it was. I was so young and uncomfortable but I still didn't understand what was happening. I could have stopped it, they were in the next room, I could have told them. But it's long past me and the fact I just figured out what happened, I keep telling myself it doesn't count. I'm lying to myself. It didn't happen the same way here, but God i wish I was lucky enough to have someone to tell. And now it's happening all over again. With another family member. And I can't say anything because no one would believe me. It's not the same as before but he's my dad, my fucking dad. I see him everyday. And it's when he's drunk, he wouldn't even remember. I wish he would stop looking at my body like that. I'm his daughter. I wish he didn't touch me. I want it to be over. I want to go home. I am home. But I never feel like I am and I can't take it anymore. I want God to take me to heaven already.

#hazbin hotel #vaggie #hazbin hotel vaggie #vaggatha #hazbin hotel vagatha #hazbin vagatha #vagatha motha #vagatha #chaggie #luggie #fallenwings #(implied)#vent #vent post #art #fanart #artists on tumblr #hazbin hotel lute #hazbin lute #lute #lute x vaggie #vaggie x lute #im giving vaggie alot of attention lately #shes just got that angst vibe that the show doesnt tap into much ykno? i want to spoil her with gut wrenching pain #also the ears look diff cuz i like to think that angels = elf ears. fallen angels = stretched point ears and demons = custom #charlie also has her own unique ones. stretched round ears. like a goat somewhat #sorry for the vent post. im projecting on vaggie for today #this is gonna flop and im more than happy with that 😭#if it got popular and people started making videos like: “that one luggie tumblr post” with like a terrified expression #man.

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bluegalaxygirl · 2 days

Text

Amnesia (KidKiller X Reader) P7

Plot: After an explosion reader wakes up in a hospital with no memory of the past few years, her parents want to take her home so she can recover and get back to a normal life while the Kid pirates want her back on the ship where she belongs.

Warning: Bad language, Medical stuff, family issues and Violence.

Reader is Female, Poly Relationship, established relationship, Kid X Reader X Killer, Reader is a member of the Kid pirates and is in charge of the money, Budgeting and negotiating the best price.

< Previous part ..... Next part >

You relax a little but keep your eyes on the two just in case, despite them keeping their distance and trying to make you feel safe you still don't trust them. "First I'd like to know exactly what you were told and who told you" Kid speaks up seeming angry about it, you somehow knew his anger isn't directed at you but it still makes you tense up a bit "Kid" Killer sighs shaking his head at his friend who jumps a little noticing he's made you go back to being tense. "It's ok… My parents told me when i woke up. They said i was kidnapped and held for ransom by Pirates when i was 19. They paid the money but I wasn't handed over and i was forced to work for them. I know i have bounty poster for being a part of the crew even if it was against my will. Urm… i think it was a few days ago, they said the pirates got into fight with the marines and there was an explosion, I was arrested but my parents manged to pull some strings so i was free to go and come here… I don't remember any of that though, i just woke up here… I don't even know where here is" You sigh looking over at the window, the world outside was nothing like your home but it wasn't scary, it actually felt better than being home. "Most of that is a lie" Kid scoffs getting angry that your parents would make up something like that but then again you did say they were awful people, Killer nods before shifting a little on the bed to fully face you "Your on Kyuka, an island on the grand line, we had to back track a bit to get some of our crew back and to come see you." Killer states watching as you nod before looking out the window.

You can't believe your on the grand line and you can't believe your parents came out here to get you, it makes you happy that they care enough to come for you. "We did take on a quite a few marine ships and there was an explosion while you were on one of their ships. It had explosives on it and you were steering it away from the Victoria Punk … Our ship, You got knocked into the water along with a few other crew member's and picked up by marines later on." The masked man continues watching as you nod along, that part matches what your parents and doctors told you, although these two seem to care a lot for you, the masked man even sounds worried when talking about the explosion, this brings one question to your head and a strange deep need to know the answer. "What's my relationship with you two?" You ask while looking down at your hand thats griped into a fist on your lap, you know there's more to all this, why would they come this far to get you if you were just a cash grab or a single member of their crew? Why do you feel so comfortable around them? Even though you know their pirates for some reason your convinced they won't hurt you or drag you away. Kid moves to sit on the bed getting you to look up at him, he goes to speak but Killer places his hand on the red head's leg "I don't know if you'll believe us" The masked man sighs as his head drops a bit seeming very unsure, Kid sighs and shakes his head putting his hand on top of the masked man's to comfort him "i want you to know, just don't freak out, please" The masked man continues, anticipation grows in you as your heart beets faster wanting to know now more than before.

Nodding at the two Kid looks back at you deciding he'll be the one to tell you since Killer seems too nervous about your reaction, "Us three are in a relationship together" He state hoping you will understand but you look between the two confused by his words, you kinda know what he means but you want him to be more clear. With a sigh the red haired man slowly moves his mental hand over to you and places it on your still clenched fist, a sense of relief washes over him when you don't pull away or flinch. You couldn't flinch away, you know he wouldn't hurt you on peruses but his hand was heavy making your fist press down onto your burned leg. Your hand shifts making him pull away in shock but you place your hand on the bed before looking up at him. "Elaborate" you state making Kid smile placing his metal hand back on yours as Killer let out a small huff of a laugh "You and your big words" Killer shakes his head, but he sounds happy which makes your heart flutter a little. "You've been a part of my crew for 7 years, Me and Killer have been together for 6 years. We didn't intend for anyone to join but" Kid gulps as his cheeks go red starting to get flustered over having to explain their relationship with you, noticing he's starting to struggle due to embarrassment Killer looks up at you and reaches over placing his hand on top of Kids mettle hand adding to the pile. Your heart pounds harder in your chest but its not out of fear, it makes you happy since you were right about the connection you feel with the two. You didn't think it would be this but you want nothing more than to hear them say how they feel.

Killer waits for your eyes to shift to him before speaking "We both fell in love with you and it took us a while to figure out what we wanted and to tell you… You felt the same, so us three have been together for 4 years now. It's a Poly relationship, we all love and care about each other" Killer finishes off for Kid the two staying quiet after to give you time to process, you may not remember being with them but it sounds so right, you know what a Poly relationship is but you never thought two people would love you and each other at the same time but your happy that it seems that way. Despite these feeling though, you still don't know them well enough to act on any of these feelings, when you know them more or remember more you can then rethink but for now its best to shove these feelings away. Just as you finish deciding what to do and how to answer your parents walk in along with the nurse from before whose apologizes over and over again to them "Get away from her" Your mother yells storming over to you as your farther glares at the two men "Get security" Your father order the nurse who jumps at his stern and angry tone. The two pirates don't move or take their hands off you not threatened by the two people who just walked in. "No, no, it's ok. I said they could stay" You pull your hand away from the two to quickly grab your mothers arm that was reaching for the empty glass vase on your side table. The nurse freezes in place not sure what to do and who to take orders off, your farther raises an eyebrow at you his anger being turned to you now as your mother looks at you in shock not only form your words but from realizing all the roses in the room are gone. Letting out a breath you try and calm yourself knowing what is going to come from the both of them, its best to keep calm in this situation.

Your Farther's abrasive voice cuts through the short silence, if you weren't so used to it then you would have jumped in shock "Y/N, these two are pirates, their the ones that-" Your farther glares at you but your blank eyes meets his stopping him from continuing "I know who they are. I know what you told me but i don't know what to believe. You're telling me one thing and their telling me another, I'd like to hear both sides before i make any kind of decision" You stay calm as you speak knowing getting angry with your farther or mother will make it less likely for them to hear you through their own anger. Your Farther takes a step towards you his eyes filled with rage that you would answer back, he looks like he's going to hit you but you know he won't, mainly because he didn't want to injure his hands. Kid growls low seeing that look on your farther's face and suddenly stand up his fists gripped ready to punch the man "I will kill you if you hurt her" In shock your quickly turn to look up at the red head whose eyes are glaring at your farther, no one has ever defended you against your parents before, everyone always takes their side. He didn't have to do anything, but he did, it sends a strange warm light feeling through your chest but in turn your head starts to hurt, it doesn't feel like a normal headache, the back of your eyes hurt as your head goes fuzzy, there's an image in your mind but it too blurry to make anything out. "Sweetie, they are dangerous, they took you from us, what ever they told you is a lie" Your mother whispers to you but you can't stop looking at Kid who's glaring back at your father, both refusing to back down from what ever mental battle is going on.

The more you look the clearer the image in your mind gets but your head hurts more and more, your ears start to slightly ring as tears well up in your eyes, not because your sad but because of the pressure building behind them. Killer manages to snap you out of your strange gaze by placing a gentle hand on your cheek, your head throbs but you look to meet his masked covered face "You ok?" Killer asks scooting closer his thumb rubbing under your eye wiping away a stray tear, even though he's wearing a mask you can tell he's concerned by his tone. Your mothers eyes widen at seeing you uncontinuously lean into his touch so quickly grabs your slung up arm "Get your hand off my daughter" She scowls while puling you away making you wince in pain grabbing onto your bandaged shoulder as pain shoots through your hole arm. "Don't pull, you'll hurt her.. Y/n you ok?" Killer growls at your mother before turning to you going back to that clam and kind voice, pulling away from your mother you rub your shoulder managing to calm the pain down a little, Killer reaches out to touch your cheek again hoping to comfort you but you push his hand away nit wanting touching you right now. "I'm fine" you finally state despite your head and shoulder throbbing, Your mother gives you a sad look before bending down to you "I'm sorry sweetie, i didn't mean to hurt you" She whispers seeming genuine in her apology so you look up at her and nod giving her a small smile letting her know it's ok. Your farther growl under his breath having enough of the situation "I want these two out of here now" Your farther orders to the nurse behind him but his eyes are glued to the red head who is still glaring back "We're not leaving unless Y/N wants us too" Kid replays as the nurse looks around the room unsure of what to do with all the different people saying different things.

Making his way around the bed towards the red-headed pirate your farther growls under his breath "My daughter has memory loss, she doesn't know what she wants" Your Farther yells only to be met head on by Kid who quickly storms over to the end of the bed getting in your farther face and towering over him, despite the clear intimidation your farther refuses to back down or break eye contact with the red head. "She may have memory loss, but she can still think for herself, she's a grown ass woman" Kid yells into your farther's face starting a yelling match between the two, your head throbs more making your vision go fuzzy, everyone voices fading in and out hardly able to make out the words being yelled. Seeing a glazed over look forming in your eyes Killer's quick to place his hand on your cheek but you slap it away much harder this time "SHUT UP" You yell making almost everyone in the room jump in shock turning their attention to you. "Please just go" You whisper while rubbing your head it starting to hurt less now that the noise has stopped, your mother gives you a happy smile, glad that you've finally agreed with them that the pirates should leave. Kid bites his tongue struggling not to continue yelling at your farther as Killer sighs standing up off the bed. "Well, hurry up and get out" Your farther steps aside gesturing towards the door for the two to leave, looking up at your farther you sigh knowing he didn't get what you were intending "You too" Your mother looks at you with wide eyes before bending down to your level "Sweetie-" she tried to say but you hold your hand up not wanting to hear it.

The nurse sighs knowing what she has to do for her patients sake, you are her patient and their for your comfort is more important "I'm sorry but visiting hours have long been over so please leave, you can come back tomorrow if she wants but if you kick up a fuss again I'll have no chose but to kick you out " She states stepping over to the bed giving you a slight nod, letting you know she's on your side. "That includes you too Mr and Miss Winslow" Your Mother goes to protest at this but your farther gabs her arm pulling her away from the bed "We will be coming back tomorrow and i hope by then you have your attitude fixed" You have to bite your tongue at your fathers comment, you wanted to berate him but it'll only make your head hurt again. "As for them, i don't want them near my daughter" Your mother pipes up looking over at Kid and Killer who haven't moving yet, although Kids fits are clenched at his side his flesh hand starting to turn white while his eyes burn into your farther, if looks could kill your father would be long dead. "Y/n? Is that what you want?" Killer calmly asks turning to you, You need to know more before you make a destitution on who to believe and the only way you'll get that is if you talk to all people involved. "I want you to come back, I-" You want to say more but your farther interrupts you making your head hurt with his sudden yell "Absolutely not" Kid storms over to your farther grabbing his shirt and pulling him closer almost lifting him off the group. "Will you let her speak for once, Gods no wonder she ran away, you over controlling narcissistic bastard" Kid yells only to be stopped by Killer who runs over and grabs the captains shoulder "That's enough, we should go, let Y/N rest. We can talk tomorrow and figure things out"

It surprises you how calm the masked man is and how easily he seems to control the situation, Kid lets go of your farther dropping him to the floor where he stumbles back while fixing his suit collar and tie. "I'm sorry Y/n, we'll let you rest" The masked man turns to you giving you a nod before grabbing Kids arm and tugging on it, The red head sighs before turning to you and rubbing the back of his head "Sorry for my out burst…. we'll see you tomorrow" You nod at his words although you did notice the slight redness in his cheeks, the nurse gives everyone a smile before gesturing towards the door getting everyone to leave. Once everyone's out the room the nurse closes the door and turns to you, making her way over she sits on the edge of the bed before pulling your shirt away from your shoulder to have a look at the bandage "I'm so sorry, i should have stepped in sooner" She whispers while checking for any sign that your wound has reopened but luckily it seemed fine, there's no blood and the bandage hasn't moved. Placing your hand on hers you look up to meet her eyes "It's ok… It's a strange situation and my parents are hard to deal with" You try and comfort her, you know there's also a big likely hood that your farther owns a percentage of this hospital so talking to him in any way other than with respect might get you fired. "Thank you for being on my side, its… rare" You admit pulling your hand away from hers letting her pull your shirt back over your shoulder.

The nurse takes your hand her small smile dropping as she thinks for a second, your about to ask her what's wrong when she starts talking. "I know it's not my place to say but your parents are right about them being dangerous. Eustass Captain Kid and Massacre Soldier Killer both have bounties over two hundred million, their part of the worst generation and ruthless… but on the other hand they do seem to care, they seemed genuinely worried and ready fight for you, it didn't seem like an act." She sighs not sure if she should be telling you all this but you squeeze her hand leaning forwards a bit while giving her a reassuring smile. "Thank you, I'll take any information is can get at this point, like i said before i don't know what to believe, the only thing i can go off is facts and some fuzzy images i can't make out" You state while rubbing your head trying to see that image again but it won't come back, the nurse nods and stands up letting go of your hand "I'll do what ever i can to help but for now I'll get you your meds and then you can rest" She turns leaving you alone in the room again, hopefully you can get more answers tomorrow and hopefully your parents will find your glasses so you can read something. Its so boring just sitting around or watching the dock where ships barely move. With a sigh you lean back against the bed while's placing a hand on your cheek, it still feels warm from Killer's touch it feels nice and you can still faintly smell Kid's cologne giving you a sense of comfort.

----- The Victoria Punk -----

The normally loud dinning room is silent something thats is very rare especially when almost the whole crew is gathered in there, Killer had just finished explaining why you weren't back with them which left the crew feeling deflated. None one spoke for a long while, most of them looking to their Captain hoping he has a plan or an idea but the red head just sat in his chair, his feet propped up on the table while his arms are crossed over his chest tightly. No one could tell what Kid was thinking or feeling, his eyes are angry but his face is blank as the captain stares off into space, with his mind clearly somewhere else Killer sighs crossing one leg over the other as he sits next to the red head. The masked man didn't know what to do, a part of him hopes that Kid will snap and just tell everyone we're grabbing you and leaving despite what they told you but he doesn't want to break any kind of trust or relationship that they have just formed. It's a miracle that you want them to come back, with a sigh Wire leans on the table looking over at his two friends, the room as been quiet for far too long and someone needs to take charge of the situation "So what do we do? Take her in the middle of the night?" The tall man asks knowing exactly what reaction he's going to get, the two men suddenly turn to look at him as they yell the same answer in anger "No" They both glare but soon release the small smirk at the corers of Wire's lips, its clear the tall man only asked that because it would snap them out of their own heads. "She stays until she agrees to come back and i ain't leaving her with those assholes so where staying… House, how long does it take for memories to come back?" Kid sates suddenly turning to the doctor who's messing with her fingers.

House gulps before slowly looking up at her captain knowing he isn't going to like the answer "I-i don't know, it could take a few days or months or years and in some cases… they might not come back at all" Her shoulders tense up as she says her last part, Kid growls while gritting his teeth but before he can start his out burst Killer steps in placing a hand on the captains shoulder giving it a hard squeeze "While were dealing with the situation i want everyone to be on high alert for marines, if her farther does have connection he might have called some in to get rid of us" The masked man states knowing that the crew is at risk, Kid sighs and nods in agreement "There should be several people on watch at all times and no one should leave the ship without permission, understand?" Kid calls out earning loud "yes Captain" from his crew which makes the red head smirk again, House raises her hand getting the two's attention before speaking "I was thinking that maybe i could join you two at some point. i want to look Y/n over, make sure she's healing well and maybe do some snooping around the hospital." She hopes they'll agree but by their thinking faces she feels like it's going to be less and less likely, luckily though they turn to each other and nod, silently agreeing on something "We'll bring it up to her and see if she agrees" Kid states hoping you'll say yes to having someone else look you over, the two don't want to overwhelm you with new people, and they also don't want another reason for your parents to bitch and moan causing you more pain and increasing the chance of a marine presence.

Through the conversation between the three a rhythmic tapping of fingers started to develop getting louder and louder, Heat has his teeth clenched as his fingers tap the table, lost in thought it was Wire who snaps hims out of it by bumping the stitched man's shoulder with his own "What's up?" The tall man whispers not wanting to interrupt Kid and Killer talking to the crew, Heat sighs and rubs his head while stopping the tapping he was uncontinuously doing "I know i've heard the last name before, Winslow, Winslow. uhhh, i-i just can't put my finger on it" The stitched man groans in frustration, its on the tip of his tongue but it just won't force itself any closer, Wire pats his friend on the back giving him some kind of reassurance, it would be nice to know who your parents are, but he doesn't want to put any more weight on Heat's shoulders. A few seconds later it finally hits the stitched man making his eyes widen in slight shock, cursing under his breath the room suddenly goes quiet all eyes turning to Heat since they know something has well and truly caught him off guard. "The Winslow family own a Drug distribution company that mainly castors to the marines and world government, a few years back they were also given a licence to make new drugs although that licence has since been revoked but i can't remember why. They also own several other big company's in weapons, fuel and have shares in others that have been handed down for generations… Their rich.. Like royalty rich"

The room goes completely silent at this no one knowing what to say about the situation, it normally wouldn't bother them if you came from a rich family but this is different, your family sells a lot of stuff to the marines and seems very buddy, buddy with them. It's true your farther can't fire a marine, but he can pull resources which will be disastrous for them so it's no wonder the commodore was so hell-bent on keeping quiet. "So what if her daddy's rich, the prick has no right" Kid growls flicking his hand in protests while leaning back in his chair but it seems some of the crew don't feel the same, they still want you back but being this rich and from a very well known family will bring its issues like it has now "I don't get it, she left and now years later they want her back, Why?" Mohawk asks a man how has been with the crew since the beginning and of course gets his name from the tall and thin orange Mohawk on his head "Something fishy is going on, i think it's a good idea to gave a few of us look into things" Narbe a man with two large scars down his face and over his eyes speaks up making the captain hum in thought, it would be good to get some info in order to have the upper hand, it also might help them in the future "Alright, you two and Heat your in charge of that but don't leave the island" The three smile giving their captain a nod happy to help out and also maybe rough up some people to get information.

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leafryoworks · 2 days

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I'm going to tell you what your favourite character in the amazing digital carnival says about you .

Please note that this isn't serious and I'm just want this to be silly . I might overdone in a few segments . Carnival au belongs to @sm-baby .

Caine : Autistic creature . You're probably afraid of being underachieved by people younger than you and you try so hard to not let it show . You tend to crave company but your differences also make you a tad left out by others . Still you got a special skill that you're sure only you have ! ...right ? Don't worry because while it may seem dark right know , the sun will come up and maybe the friends you need will come and find you .

Pomni : The most girlfailure . You tend to try to have your sh-uhm , responsibilities and thoughts pulled together to be a functioning adult but not all things probably pulled off succesfully . Still it's the thought that matters and the worst thing you could do is not try at all . Do that thing you wanted , you never know what might happen .

Queenie : You got underlying mommy issues . She gives you the classic wine aunt you never get to experience . There are things that you couldn't control , you might say it collars you down to your place . But...remember the loved ones by your side . They may not be able to offer the freedom you seek and...they may not be the best people they are right know but the worst thing you could do is abandon the ones that cared about you .

Kinger : Silly and a bit kooky . Trauma changes who you are and there are moments you're not at the best headspace . You probably seek entertainment to lose your sense of reality and not face the sadness and tragedy knowing it would rock your world in the worst case . You need someone to hold your hand , to give you company...eventhough you know subconciously that it's not real .

Jax : The artist who lost his motivation . You're a bit curious on how things tend to work and likes seeing the colour red on paper . The reason I only draw something so violent on paper was to let my anger out and you know what I'm trying to say connecting to this segment . And yet we all know that anger is just overwhelming sadness that you don't know how to let out . We all got problems and things that aren't aligned with others regarding in coping mechanisms . And yet...eventhough you might say you don't need them , who are you lying to ?

Ragatha : Mommy issues ! Abandoment issues ! You can't florish under pressure and negativety or else your heart will ached and cause you to not breathe . That's why you try to make things more easier for others so when they're happy , you're happy . If they're sad , you're sad . Literally . You hold on to your beliefs because no way you're wrong eventhough the evidence is right infront of you ! You live to serve for others because if you have no worth , why...did they kept you around ?...sorry , I got overprojecting , hah . The least you could do is actually let people have their say eventhough it's sad . Bottled up emotions are not healthy and might ruin you and the people you care in a long run . There are things you gotta accept eventhough it might go against on your beliefs . You can't control things in a happy get going situation , this ain't a tv show you can script 24/7 .

Gangle : Maladaptive dreamer . You don't know what's real and what's not fake . The people , the friends you make , are they real ? Your family even ? It's blurry as you toed the line and you find it hard to believe that they are real people you interact with eventhough you know it's true . Sometimes you could be doing work and panicked realizing you're in the real world and not in the world you made up in your head . You rather live your live in ecstasy while dreading the reality that awaits you outside . But enough of that , you got your blorbos in your head to keep your company because they're real ! ...but in your head or is there more...?

Zooble : The cool protector . You tend to protect those who are high up in your list and would be the one nodding your head sagely as your bestfriend rambles about their crush . You care about people just not overcaring to Ragatha's extent . People think you're cool and you probably are . And there are things , secrets that you have to hide of a friend from your other friends because...you know it's the best for their situation . Somethings have to be kept under high security for the best of your friends . You know it's for their best of them and you have to carry the burden to keep the people you care safe . That's your job .

Able : Charmer . You worked so hard to learn and understand your loved one's interests and going as far to be an expert on it . Surely when you are a master of it then you guys can talk and hang out more . What's wrong with that ? You just want to understand them a bit more closer but if that's not working then there must be something wrong . Maybe you're not trying enough so you would try harder . Time to hit the books ! There's nothing wrong with you , don't let the voices in your head fool you !

Bubble : He's so silly ! He reminds you of a pet you wanna pampare and put in a play pen .

Kaufmo : You chose the funniest guy in the cast , huh ? Excellent choice . You like jokes , bad ones even told by others because it means they have thought of cheering people up and that really touched your heart . You tend to be silenced eventhough you are right and yet sometimes they don't wanna listen . The other half is that they do listen , they just don't care . Eventhough the world may not look at it's prime for a moment , you knew you have to keep trying to make the best of it eventhough your attempts may not succeed . But it's better trying than not even trying at all , right ?

Alright people , that's a wrap ! Sorry if it may offend some of you so just letting you guys know it's not 100% accurate , okay ? Okay .

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libby-for-life · 1 day

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How do you think this Adam who has memories of death and suffering love and just his long life and after life would deal with the fact that in Eden Death and all these bad things aren't even a thing yet. This Lucifer and Lilith haven't done anything to hurt him yet(aside from lying and sleeping together and avoiding him but now they love him and want him so thats fixed).

They think he is their sweet naive Adam but I wonder if part of him will be frusterated because he sort of ISN'T. would he ever snap at all this affection they want to give him because he can't understand why NOW? want to lash out and make them hurt because when they didn't notice 'Their' sweet adam was replaced? like dude is agrown as man and technically older in experience than these two..had a bunch of kids..went through alot of stuff..death twice even.

lucifer punching him over and over in that final battle despite giving into mercy thanks to charlie..would he wonder if the entire universe was reset? did everything he experience just.... not happen? was it just a vision of the potential future? a bad dream? does he think this is some elaborate punishment like heaven likes to give him and his loved ones when they get prideful or not obedient?

Would he ever miss the versions of lilith and lucifer he knew from the timeline he experienced despite the hurt and pain just because they would be comfortable in their familiarity?

its really interesting because Lilith and lucifer seem the ones more in control with a plan while they believe adam is acting odd and they want to know why but they basically still see them as their normal Adam.

while WE know the balance is a bit different because Adam has knowledge and has known them longer it seems cuz of the memories....

like when Adam fell from the tree it startled them both but i wonder if adam will have moments of being scared or on edge because he remembered when death and actual pain and hurt was a thing while lilith and lucifer might not notice/realize because those havent been invented yet.

considering lucifer is a angel...would he try to look a bit more into why adam's behaviour has changed?

like it seems they think its just adam realized that Lilith was sneaking away to be around lucifer and that adam and lonely and upset they'd lie and that he might have picked up on the distance....which could explain his behaviour....but WE know Adam's change is rooted a bit more deeply than that...will they notice more behaviour changes that don't quite line up with things?

I wonder if adam would ever kind of treat them like kids since these are younger versions of the people he knows? even if he's now in his younger body and technically the same age as lilith his mind/memories are older?

if adam is particularly talented at sex stuff...would lilith and lucifer wonder how he got that good without them realizing?

would adam ever have flashes of feelings like shame of his body or of being naked while lucifer and lilith pick up something wrong bt they won't have the context since shame was a punishment that hasn't been given yet?

and he can't really address it because he is trying not to be caught?

would they even believe him if he came clean about his memories? or is it his best bat to make sure no one has to suffer from the sins and free will? like before lilth seemed bothered about adam just doing as he was told and how it felt like he was going through the motions and just accepting everything at face value so she let herself doubt his ability to choose...but considering this adam know exactly what happens when they break the rules and can be an educated decision...would adam have more conviction in his choice about following the rules now that Lilith would notice or would lucifer and lilith be bias and think they know best and that adam is just being too cautious?

considering lucifer in now both their lovers(i guess) does that mean lucifer won't get in trouble now or would they want Adam to keep it a secret from the other angels?

Is adam startled at the sensitivity of his body even if his mind remembering being used to it?

I wonder if Lucifer and Lilith will catch on that Adam likes touch since Lilith seemed aware that Adam seems to like to cling and be close like the monkeys even if he tried to distance himself? would they start reaching out and touching and holding Adam first more?

i wonder if Adam will do more stuff for music to be made and stuff?

would Adam try working out to get stronger just in case he ever gets kicked out of Eden again?

dude wants to be upset at them so much but these versions are so sweet and feel so young vs the ones he knew and haven't done the worst yet. I wonder if he ever notices aspects the versions HE knows in his normal timeline now that he's comparing them to more naive honest versions of themselves...like they think they are so sneaky but is it kindof cute compared to their future versions? does he notice lucifer looks sincerely happy here and aspects compared to the more bravado version who was smug and kicked his ass but who was definitely also depressed? how lucifer likes creating things and was so gentle now but in that future needed someone else to snap him out of his rage....(though to be fair adam can probably understand a fathers protective rage). would adam compare this lilith to the one he made a deal with in the regular timelines? would lilith have a front to? but be more aware this lilith isn't really doing stuff for long planning just yet.

I wonder if Adam will also notice aspects like how this lucifer is treated by heaven or get lilith to actually tell him why she'd lie instead of hashing it out properly since dude WAS a father so probably could realize people don't react the way they do out of nowhere.

Does this Adam ever reflect on how he reacted to get where he was in the final battle before he was stabbed?

though I guess he never really knew why he was in heaven anyway so randomly getting thrown into the past wouldn't be the weirdness thing over all he's done. I wonder if he'll ever think about how he's killed people and seen people die and how this lucifer and lilith have no idea about that aspect and how scary it can be...hmmm.

will the other angels catch on that something is up?

Okay, so a lot to unpack from the Theirs au of yandere!Lucifer/Adam/yandere!Lilith. Read that if you don't want spoilers.

Okay, so Adam would definitely have some points where he does feel overwhelmed by it all. He has experienced more and it's hard to forget all that. He's going to sometimes think if what he experienced was even real...then why was it so vivid? He will even panic when something reminds him too much of his past...or is future? Adam isn't so sure....best not to think about it too hard.

Adam is definitely going to fight their love (read:obsession) and he's going to try to avoid them as best as can. He lasted a week before Lucifer found him in a cave. (Theirs! Part 2). Adam also learns what happens to angels, or humans, when they try to fight their love. Heaven has it's own set of punishment...

Adam wouldn't treat them like kids because they don't look like kids. They don't act like kids and they all have had sex so it would be weird for him to think of them as kids.

He would be conflicted about the *other* versions of Lucifer and Lilith....he doesn't want to think about that. It hurts too much.

Lucifer and Lilith think that they know better and they will delude themselves into thinking Adam will need them. (I'm headcanoning that they gain Knowledge by themselves before even attempting to eat the fruit.) He will try to fight them, but being constantly told that he needs them, being held against his will, and having sex with them until he's brought to sub space, well, it's a bit hard to fight them. He eventually will succumb to their will.

Adam was...okay at sex. But, despite Lilith being relatively new to it and Lucifer showing them all what he learned in Heaven, Adam still feels inexperienced simply because Lilith and Lucifer are *better* at sex than he is. You can have all the knowledge but if you can't implement it, then it's useless.

Lucifer will want Adam to keep their relationship a secret, the other angels would get furious if they knew that he had defiled the first man and woman of humanity.

He will have times of body shame, but Lucifer and Lilith are quick to assure him and love him and hug him until he stops saying them.

They catch it early on that Adam is touch starved, but will fight them, so they hold him against his will until he's calmed down and is docile. (They wait until he stops fighting and gives up due to exhaustion.)

Lucifer and Lilith want to do everything for Asam so they do. Adam doesn't need to work out or do anything too strenuous because they will do it for him.

And, well, they can be sweet to Adam. But they are *very* possessive of Adam. They won't tolerate anyone touching or being with Adam. They will get rid of anyone who thinks they can touch what is theirs. Be it some cherub or a new human that could pop up...they will eliminate the competition. Without Adam's knowledge of course. No need to upset him. (Part 5 of Theirs)

If anyone ever catches on to what they're doing, they will all be thrown out of Eden. Possibly Hell. Lucifer and Lilith won't care as long as they have Adam. Adam will be depressed for a while, but he isn't alone so *eventually* he gets...sort of better.

They will have fronts that they keep in front of Adam. They will try to hide their darker nature that keeps reeling their ugly heads. Adam will eventually see through it, but even now, he still thinks they are...well, weird and touchy and don't listen but he doesn't think of capable of anything truly nefarious.

Not yet anyway...

#hazbin hotel #adamsapple #hazbin hotel adam #hazbin hotel lucifer #send asks #Lucifer/Adam/Lilith #yandere lucifer #yandere lilith #Yandere Eden au

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neet-elite · 2 days

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↳ EVENT 28. C!M!Sydney (Worship & Yandere)

Pairing: C!M!Sydney / F!Reader Genre: Smut 18+ WC: 2,462 Warnings: worship, yandere, kidnapping, gagging, drool, drinking drool, handjob, rope, religious contexts, surprisingly soft?, somnophilia, dubcon (consent is not stated, assume noncon to be safe, but it depends on how you want to read it.) Prompt(s): 05 — worship + 18 — yandere Event Masterlist: CLICK HERE!!

A/N: also very nasty. god im sorry for exposing yall to my secrets LMAO.... i went for something not PIV to keep myself sane, so i hope its at least still enjoyable <3 sydney has so much yandere potential!!! mixed with the religious themes and god <33 big fav ty for letting me ramble a lil!

Heavy footsteps thump through the dark basement, creaky steps announcing his arrival within the dungeon, though soon are overtaken by the buzz of fluorescent lights, flicked on for his own comfort rather than anything as kind as your sight. Humming with his steps, seemingly without a care in the world as he makes his way towards your limp body slowly. Carefully calculated footsteps so as to not frighten you too much— he'd hate a repeat of last week. You were so loud with your wailing, God, barely allowing him to scrape by with a half-assed excuse for his fathers concerns.

That's why you've got the gag now, see? Oh, but he made sure to buy you the softest material, painstakingly picking the prettiest fabric to shut you up with, because you deserve only the best.

"Love?" His voice croaks upon reaching you, your head hanging low for him to tilt at curiously. Asleep? Well, even unconscious you're still the prettiest thing he's ever seen, a sick smile beaming down at you when your drowsy frame refuses to respond to him in any meaningful manner. No matter, he still loves you even when you're not awake. In fact, perhaps a little more than usual, only because you're so easy to dote upon!

Absentmindedly, he kneels before you. Cupping his legs with his arms wrapped around them, simply doting down at you from above. How long have you been down here again... God, he can't quite remember. But love does that to you, doesn't it? Melds all the happy days together, an amalgamation of sobs and kisses in blended days; it's got to have been some time, though. The ropes that bind you to the pillar in the basement have been digging into your skin enough to leave bruising, prompting him to wince down at you. "If only you had listened better..." He tuts to himself, running his thumb feather light over where the rope has slipped a little to reveal your wounds.

He'll have to tighten them later. At least until you can be trusted to roam the basement without supervision.

You know, he's spent his whole life in worship. Praying, begging to a false God for any sort of recognition. Doing his best to live life by the book, avoiding all that threatens to tempt him— but then you came along. Ethereal and blessed in his eyes, just begging to be followed. And so it's no surprise that he was immediately cast aside by the place he once called home, now finding refuge in your doe eyes and tear stained cheeks.

A temptress in your own right, worming your way under his skin so easily; it's no wonder that he soon switched religion. And, determined to prove his worth as a loyal follower of his new God, you, he could think of no better way than to hole you up in the dark dank so as to hold private sermons whenever he so wishes. His affections were already strong to begin with, something akin to fated obsession, right? From the moment you had first spoke to him, setting butterflies ablaze in his tummy— the feeling he's came to understand as love once resembling upset to his sheltered mind. But his feelings only grow the longer he holds you against the pillar, resolved to make you deeply feel just how much he loves you, how strongly he believes in you above all else, until you believe in him too.

But, he's not quite there yet. He can feel it, staring down at you with the kind of intrinsic understanding that only lovers share. That's how he knows he's doing the right thing when he settles on his ass with a soft oof in front of you, taking advantage of your crossed legs to wrap his own at either side of you, scooching closer only to brush stray strands of hair from your pretty face.

Ah, the face of a God. How honoured he feels to be touching you right now, ignoring the twitch in his pants from the scent of you in favour of caressing your cheek. Thumb stroking along it, teeth biting down on his bottom lip to keep his breath contained— you look so sweet right now, all fatigued and sleepy. He'd hate to disturb you too much, and, given how exhausted he is from keeping up appearances in that heathen church, he can scarcely find the energy to do more than stare. Touching you so gently, so delicately, as if he were afraid that any more pressure would prompt you into breaking before him. He loves you so much, enough to kidnap you and keep you hostage in his lonely basement for all eternity, it seems.

Somewhere in his body he knows his actions to be wrong, but the way your bottom lip wobbles before him easily coaxes him out of his rationality, his voice a hushed whisper with:

"Are you dreaming of me? Can you feel the way I touch you? Do you yearn as much as I do?"

The answer, inevitably, is no. No one, including yourself, could ever hope to match his state of desperation, prepared to live through a lifelong battle consisting of solely proving that very same fact to you. The life of a follower, a devout worshipper of all that you are, were, and will be.

When contained within the four walls he's caged you inside, that is.

He'll dress the place up for you, eventually. Gifts and favours, all meant to appease his God. But that'll come later, when you learn to accept his followership the way a God should. You're new to the whole divinity ordeal, so he's cutting you some slack.

But the longer he stares at you lovingly, the harsher his thumb digs into the fat of your cheek, the more his cock twitches with need to prove himself to you. Whether you're awake or not doesn't matter to him, he doesn't need your sobbing to confirm his place by your side— though you do sound oh so pretty when weeping his name. It's just that, well, any time spent with you is time well spent, he thinks. And tonight, he intends on revering you as he does much the same any night.

Free hand hovering over his cock, he settles into the cold stony flooring under him. Shuffling ever closer to you, he's found quite intimately that he can never be too close to you. But he needs only get close enough to reach your fingers right now, interlocking the hand that was on your cheek with your own in a tender display of followship. Of afflicted affection, feeling unable to do anything but cherish your existence.

"My love," He whispers to the lifeless body before him, drinking in the sight of your steady breaths. It's the calmest he gets to view you, so he keeps his touch careful in hopes of stealing more glances. "Allow me some alone time, please.." He huffs, cock already rock hard before you simply from slight touch. Doesn't this mean that you were made for him? Made exclusively for his gratification, for him to abide by, to keep an eye on you to make sure that you're forever safe?

Don't you think he deserves a little repayment in the form of the aforementioned alone time every now and then?

It's not like he's asking for much, lovingly lifting your flaccid hand only to place it against his hard cock, immediately letting out a shaky sigh at the heavenly contact your fingertips offer his bulge. A secret mass, forced upon his sleeping deity in such a perverted way, making your fingers caress his throbbing length because he can, because he knows that deep down you'd want to, right? You'd look upon his soft pout, the way his chest heaves with deep breaths every time he manhandles your fingertips against his own leaking tip, and you'd want to help him like the good little God you are to him, right?

And if not, well, he's very willing to help teach you the right way to behave. He's only been studying Gods his entire life; you had better trust him by now to know what's best for you.

Gradually, he applies pressure on your wrist. Aiding your motions, helping you stroke along his hard cock outline as a means to bond together. "Feels so good, love..." He huffs out against you, voice a tad bit louder due to the sheer amount of pleasure pooling in his tummy, throwing caution to the wind the more you play with him. Even if it's more so his doing, part of his worship is to help, is it not? Assisting your eager fondling by grinding his hips up and against your palm, relishing in the gentleness of your hand contrasting against each harsh throb of his cock. Taking private enjoyment in how good it feels to be so dirty with you, how the act of humping into your palm is not shamed by you, unlike his previous faith. But instead, he feels hedonistic pleasure in every roll of his hips, ass bucking up off the ground once or twice to really dig his leaking tip against your willing hand.

But it's all a bit too good to be true, he thinks. God, the way he could just stay here forever with you if it were possible— but alas, he has a life to live, too. Jealous as he is of your perfect position, able to remain unseen and unnoticed by many, hidden away with your palm on his cock, he stays mindful not to complain too much. After all, if not for his trips outside of such a sacred space, he'd never have been graced by the sight of your pretty gagged face. Cooing softly down at you, still yet fucking his bulge against your unknowing palm, he thinks something that feels so good could never be bad, right?

Not in the least because it's you who's causing his hips to stutter, a broken little whine escaping him at the way you so easily help him feel euphoric, not even needing to be conscious of your efforts to have him a panting mess before you.

"Angel..." Escapes him, and he fucking means it too. His little angel, clipped wings behind your broken back, doing your utmost to make him smile, to keep him happy. He can't help but to shiver into your innocent touch, letting your wrist turn limp once more for but a brief second. "Missed you so— ah, so much—" He ends up moaning, unbuttoning his pants and tugging on them enough to have his cock spring free before your sleeping body. Maybe he played with you a little too roughly the other day...

It's just that he wants to worship you so bad! And so well too, making sure to be so thorough in his prayer sessions that you end up exhausted the next day. But it's okay, he doesn't mind the weak grip of your hand as he instructs your fingers to wrap around his now exposed cock the way he likes, letting you simply feel how hard he throbs for you for a minute or so.

That, and he doesn't want to blow a load immediately. Calming himself down with shallow breaths, idly stroking at your fingers with his own until he feels like he can safely move your hand up and down— slowly. Lazily, almost, leaning back on his free hand so that he has a good view of your body as you're made to jerk him off.

And you feel so good. Too good, really, an uncomfortable weight resting in his chest when he tries his best to live up to the self imposed expectations he holds for himself. Is he even worthy of your touch right now? Hips bucking into your hand turned fleshlight regardless, because he's obsessed with your very existence. How you just feel so right when loosely gripping his cock like that, dozing away to yourself and still offering him such innocent pleasure.

You're down here fisting him off because it's only you who can make him feel this way. So choked up with moans, threatening to tumble from his bitten lips and wake you up with every idle up and down he flicks your wrist into, matching your strokes with little thrusts of his own, head thrown back in sheer enjoyment for the satisfaction you give him. Measly little fingers around his fat cock— it'd be embarrassing if he wasn't already head over heels for you, unashamed of just how much he constantly wants you, enough to use you like some sort of sex toy as a twisted means to honour your presence. See, do you see how good you're making me feel? he wants to whimper. You can't blame me for keeping you all to myself, right? Not when your barely there touch feels this good, God...

But he refrains, if only to practice future prayer sessions with you. His cock pulsing against your fingers, leaking precum onto your knuckles as he tightens his grip around your hand. Instructing his God perfectly to get him off quickly, struggling to catch his breath as his balls brow tight and taught under you.

"Ah— Close—" Is all he gets out before he's humping your hand faster, cursing under his breath at the high pitched whine that falls from his open mouth, eyes squeezed shut as he continues to fuck upwards as his load shoots with him. Up and forward, fat strings of his seed covering the top of your head, dribbling down your front from just how much your hand strokes out of him. Because he doesn't stop manipulating your wrist as his orgasm washes over him, making sure you milk every last drop of devotion out of him until you're left a sticky, unaware, sleeping mess.

But he can't just stop there, no! Driven to prove himself some more despite the daze settling into his lust addled mind, he leans forward. Your hand still loose on his tacky with cum cock, in one swift move he tilts your chin up for him to kiss your lips over your gag. The low rumble moan in response letting him know that you're waking to his greedy action, but he doesn't have it within him to stop. Licking over your gag, sucking on the drool you've inevitably spilled from having the item permanently fixed to your maw. He won't let a single drop go to waste, do you see how much he loves every part of you?

Any way to get any part of you inside of him, licking his lips selfishly as he pulls back to greet you.

"Afternoon, love."

#500 event!#dol smut #degrees of lewdity smut #sydney the fallen #sydney the fallen smut

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