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my-love-is-sunlight · 2 months

Text

Full bloom

Zoro x reader

Warnings: fem reader, swearing, reader is mad at Zoro, SFW

Word count: 1.7k

Summary: In which you overhear Zoro talking badly about you.

Notes: This is also my bird!reader but decided to take another rote with this one idk this is literally just my one piece self insert just wanted to write about them

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

PT2 ➜

You were not the kind to fall slow, you’ll fall completely flat, rough and knowing it’ll probably hurt badly, not even stretching your hands to stop the fall, pouring your whole heart and soul

You’ll fall hard

The moment you saw Zoro Roronoa you knew you were doomed, falling for someone like him was gonna be a huge problem not only because he so happened to be part of the pirate crew you were asked to join, but because you quickly picked up he wasn’t a feelings kind of guy, he was stoic and closed up like a big old book with a even bigger lock

But one day the feelings for the swordsman that had bloomed in your heart were quick to wither and rot, after overhearing a conversation between him a some other members of the crew

“I don’t know why you invited her Luffy” Zoro scoffed “An archer is useless we already have Usopp he’s a good shooter, and her powers are ridiculous”

Your heart sinked at every word that left Zoro’s mouth, after feeling rejected your whole life and thinking you had finally found a place where you belonged, you’re proven wrong once again

“Don’t say that Zoro!” Luffy defended which made you smile a little “She’s not only that! Y/n is this very powerful warrior and turning into a bird is the coolest thing I’ve ever seen!” He sounded excited, at least your captain liked you

Zoro’s silence was like a dagger going through your poor heart, holding your breath in hopes he’ll answer and say that he was wrong, but instead your ears catch Sanji’s mischievous laugh

“Don’t tell me you feel threatened by such a gorgeous lady mosshead”

You were thorn between running away or pull yourself closer to the door to listen, but Zoro made that decision for you after hearing a muffled thud followed by his loud screaming

“Shut up! I’m going to be the world’s greatest swordsman I am never intimidated specifically by some stupid bird you dumb cook!” You stood outside the door, hurt and angry, you thought Zoro would be different from the men in your island, always overlooking you and judging your abilities for reasons you couldn’t control

After this incident you decided to avoid the green haired pirate completely, if he already was hard to talk to, whenever you were tasked to do something together you kept your mouth shut, always training opposite sides of the Merry and answering him coldly. Everyone picked up on your change in behavior, the contrast between how you treated literally everyone else, even strangers, compared to Zoro was palpable, your whole aura shifted at the sight of him

But as upset as you were, you two made perfect fighting partners. Those were the only times when you’ll put your pride aside, after all you were a professional and valued the place Luffy had offered you in the crew, and as much as you hated to admit it, Zoro was an exceptional swordsman.

After some time, the stoic man had warmed up to your presence, he now respected you since he saw you were not only capable but complemented him in battle like no one else in the crew. Everything he knew about you was only things he’ll pick up when you would chat with others or little antics and traits he’ll put attention to, but it was enough to trust you and have a real read into your character

“Why do you always avoid me?” Zoro asked one time while you both walked back to the Going Merry, he had gotten lost again, and you were the assigned Zoro’s compass since you were able to fly around and find him easily, which you didn’t quite enjoy especially now that he decided to instigate whatever had happened between you two

You scoffed “Where did you get that idea from?”

“Everyone notices how mean you are to me and I am not blind” mean, that word lingered like poison in your ears, you were the kind of person to always try be the best version of yourself, being patient and understanding, so hearing Zoro calling you mean felt unfair

“I have my reasons” the green haired pirate noticed your body language change completely, you stiffened and your breath quickened, fist clenching. This wasn’t exactly the direction he wanted this conversation to go but he wasn’t quite good at talking

“How dramatic” he whispered but loud enough so you’ll hear him, already giving up in a peaceful chat

You stopped in your tracks anger boiling up and reaching your tongue immediately “Oh fuck off” Zoro’s eyes widened, he had never heard you swear let alone seen you this angry before

“You can go ahead and call me whatever you want, but you don’t know me Zoro” there you stood in front of this man that doubled you in size, eyes that froze him in place, your face was red with fury and the tension could be seen from a mile away. The swordsman backed up slowly, was he feeling threatened?

“But if you did, you’ll know I know better than to talk shit behind my crewmates back” in a swift move you morphed into your bird form, not wanting to continue the conversation and soared the skies, high enough so he could still follow you back

No one had ever stood up to Zoro that way before, he silently walked under you a million thoughts going through his head at once, what did you meant about talking shit about another crewmate? I mean of course he would talk shit but nothing ever serious, but again, how could you know if he barely even said hi to you?, a little guilt settled on him, maybe he was the mean one after all

Curiosity tickled him as his mouth opened and without thinking twice he screamed your name in hopes you’ll fly back down, after a little thinking you did, perching on a nearby tree before chirping at him

“Can you like… not… be a bird?” You made what it seemed to be an angry sound before morphing back to your original form while soaring down, landing in front of him arms crossed brows furrowed

“I don’t talk to assholes” you had always been the bigger person your whole life, so acting petty maybe wasn’t your style but really you didn’t cared enough what Zoro would think of you, after all you still seemed to think he viewed you as useless

“You still haven’t answered my question” his tone shifted, you had started to annoy him, he hated people that aren’t straightforward “I don’t know you you’re right, but maybe if you allowed me to we wouldn’t be here in the first place”

“I know you didn’t wanted me in the strawhats” you blurted out, knowing he wouldn’t drop the matter before arriving back to the ship and wanted to avoid everyone hearing you “You think I’m ridiculous and useless” that came out way shakier than you wanted to, finally showing how hurt you actually felt “My whole life I’ve been underestimated, I’m a woman and my powers are always taken as a joke, my abilities never recognized just because of how I look and who I am, when I joined you guys I thought I could leave that behind…”

The swordsman felt a knot forming on his throat, feeling absolutely unequipped for this situation and mostly, guilty, guilty he had ever made you feel something remotely close to this. It was true, when you first joined he didn’t quite agreed on Luffys decision but after all he was the captain, but you had proven him wrong showing your hard work and talents. For a moment you reminded him of someone he had cared for long ago, which made this whole fiasco even worse, feeling terrible he couldn’t even mutter a response, only standing before you absolutely bare.

“I am not asking you to be my best friend in the world, just for respect and some trust, at least the same one you give everyone else” ouch, your words as soft as they left your lips felt sharp, cutting onto Zoro’s ears.

You search his features for a reaction, an expression, anything, but he was unreadable still a stranger to you. Regret simmered in your gut, maybe should’ve kept your thoughts to yourself

Before you could walk away any further from him, Zoro gripped your wrist forcing you to stay and look back at him

“I actually think you’re pretty skilled for a bird” he offered you a small lopsided smile to try and freshen the mood which you were thankful for “You’re a fearless fighter, and more capable than others in the crew, If I ever made you think any different I apologize”

A breath you didn’t know you were holding escaped your lips, grateful he wasn’t actually an ass like you had painted him to be

“You gotta watch your mouth Roronoa” you smirked back “Could’ve lost your perfect fighting partner” you pulled yourself out of his grip and walked towards the Merry

Zoros laugh ringed in your ears, something you never thought you’ll hear, at least between only you two “This means you’ll stop training by yourself and finally join me? Or are you too scared?”

A heavy weight lifted from swordsman’s shoulders, finally able to bond with you and solving the never ending mystery the haunted him because contrary to your beliefs, he always noticed the distance you drew between you and him, it ate him alive. But now, you could finally see yourselves in your true colors, enjoy your time together and grow closer

“Yeah like you scare me” you pushed him playfully a smile tugging on your lips “If you wanted to train with me so bad should’ve just asked”

Zoro rolled his eyes “Don’t get too cocky birdie, I could destroy you in a sparring session anytime”

Slowly but surely, the swordsman had once again found his way into your heart, the garden that once withered grew strong once again, and little did you knew that you had also made love bloom in his, but that was a problem to deal with another time

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

Gonna most likely make this a series ☝🏻 like always request are open and feel free to correct me English is not my first language

304 notes · View notes

piggyinthesea · 5 months

Text

The Night After Monaco

part 2 of this fic

pairing: charles leclerc x reader, max verstappen x reader

word count: idk prolly more than 2k

warnings: shouting, smut, messy charles, stress, anxiety, fluff, kind of sugar daddy charles, max being desperate, gaslighting

summary: charles teaches you things you didn’t know about yourself he shows you what it means to truly be taken care of. but, does this mean things are really done with max?

Son las cinco 'e la mañana y yo no he dormido nada

It’s 5 in the morning and I haven’t slept at all

Pensando en tu belleza, en loco voy a parar

Thinking of your beauty, going to end up crazy

El insomnio es mi castigo, tu amor será mi alivio

Insomnia is my punishment, your love is my relief

Y hasta que no seas mía no viviré en paz

And until your mine, I won’t live in peace

There’s always someone watching. Every time you do something there’s always someone or something watching. You realized that when you found a post on Instagram about the other night.

f1exlusiveupdates

f1exlusiveupdates: Charles Leclerc, ferrari driver, spotted leaving an exclusive club with company shortly after his Monaco Gp win. No images including the female’s face.

↳ user233 just a hook up, not a big deal.

↳ charlesismybf it’s me guys, I’m the female☺️

↳ formula1luver baby come home the kids miss you

327 comments 15,000 likes

Charles had sent the article to you that had been posted that same evening with a message asking to talk. It shouldn’t have bothered you the way it did but, you became extremely anxious to hear what he had to say.

The moment Charles’s had woken up he was met with a text from his brother, Arthur. Arthur had sent the article with an abundance of questions of who, what, when, why. After Arthur persisted, Charles had told him everything.

He explained your situation, the ‘break’, and he even threw in the hickey on Max’s neck to ease it all. Arthur had nothing to say. His moral compass was being challenged and he didn’t know whether the whole thing was right or wrong.

1. It was Max’s idea to take the break.

2. The relationship was already running its course (Due to mainly Max’s fault).

3. Max cheated on you too.

He explained to Charles that it wasn’t right to take his chance with you right after taking a break knowing you were vulnerable and just needed a friend, however, technically speaking he did nothing wrong. Charles definitely needed to talk to you and figure out what exactly was going on and what the both of you intended to do. He had an entire speech prepared. He wanted to ask you if you’d consider pursing a relationship with him. He understood that it’ll definitely cause a scandal and he planned to assure you he could take it as slow as you wanted to. He wanted to tell you he didn’t see you as just ‘a hook up’. He wanted a deep and meaningful relationship with you, if you’d let him attain one.

However, his speech was forgotten and completely eradicated from his brain when he saw you. You wore a simple outfit. A graphic t-shirt with jeans. Yet, you still knocked the breath out of him.

For a moment he didn’t know what to say. “Hey.”

You awkwardly smile. Your anxiety was booming and him looking so gorgeous did not help you. You had already mentally prepared yourself for rejection.

“Hi.”

You let him in and the both of you begin walking towards the couch in the living room. Awkward silent moments pass. Still, no one had said anything and the both of you stayed staring at each other.

“H-“

“Y-”

You cut each other off.

“You go first.”

“No, sorry you go first.” He says with his cheeks burning up.

“I understand if the other night was just something casual to you. And I’m sorry about the article.” You ramble. You didn’t mean to cause a scandal and make things messy for him. You hoped he didn’t hold anything against you.

“It wasn’t casual! Sorry. Sharing that night with you was so amazing. I want more of that. I know it’ll be extremely hard for you but, if you’d have me, I’d enjoy a serious relationship with you.” He quickly states, mentally cussing himself out for acting a fool.

His words take a few moments to process. You hadn’t considered the possibility that he’d want a relationship with you. Maybe it was because you had low-self worth but being in a public relationship with Charles scared you. His fan base was crazy.

The internet would have a field day if they had ever found out you have a relationship with Charles. They’d call you out kinds of names. Slut, whore, homie-hopper. You could see it clearly. “I don’t know if having a relationship would be the best idea. I don’t even know if I still have one. And besides the internet-”

“Forget about the internet. Do you want me?”

You answered within a flash, “Yes.”

“We shouldn’t let it the internet rule our lives. They won’t understand, but at least we’ll have each other.” He reaches towards your hands and holds them together, “Ma belle, I promise we can take it as slow as you need to.”

His eyes silently pleaded at you. He looked at you with his big brown eyes and long eyelashes. He was irresistible and oh-so-pretty. He acted as if he expected you to say no. How could you though? When he looked at you with longing and passion the way he was doing right now…it’d be hard to ever say no.

“Okay. But first I need to talk to Max. We never officially broke up.”

“Of course.” Before leaving, he pulls you in and leans forward. His lips feel soft against yours. A simple act of affection is so tempting and before the kiss is deepened, he pulls away and leaves your flat.

You knew what you had to do now. You dreaded every second of it but you texted Max.

vroom vroom

come over, we need to talk.

I’ll be there in a couple minutes

read 2:03 pm

It didn’t take long for the door to your pad ring. Each step you took as you walked closer and closer made you feel extremely uneasy. The door knob felt sticky against your sweaty hands.

Max stood in front of you with a bouquet of flowers. Without asking, he let himself in (a perfect reminder that he’s been here plenty of times before and this might as well been his second home).

“These are for you. I decided to forgive you and move on. Look, we can just forget this ever happened.” He handed the bouquet of flowers to you. You stood confused, yet you quickly became agitated the moment his words process.

“You forgive me?” You questioned, daring him to elaborate.

“Are you serious right now- look, I didn’t come here to fight. Baby, I don’t want our relationship to end. Don’t end this because of one mistake you did.” He says in a condescending tone.

The nerve of him. There’s no possible way he believes he’s still in the right. For fucks sake, he still has a hickey from another woman on his neck yet he’s coming to you as if you were the one in the wrong.

“My mistake? Max you have a fucking hickey from another woman on your neck. You don’t think this has anything to do with you?”

At this point, you were seriously debating throwing his shit-bouquet at him. He remained speechless, standing like a dumb ass waiting for another word to come out of your mouth. “You know what just leave. We’re done .” You angrily push him out and (gladly) shut the door.

You let out a huge sigh and ran both hands through your hair, frustrated as ever.

y/ninstagramuser has unfollowed maxverstappen1

y/ninstagramuser has followed charles_leclerc

charles_leclerc has followed y/ninstagramuser

It was only half an hour you’ve unfollowed Max until you heard a notification from Charles. It was a link…to yet again another gossip article. You physically groaned and mentally prepared yourself to get bashed.

formulaonebestgossip

formulaonebestgossip: Has the beloved grid couple broke up? Evidence to back this claim up consists of the fact that Y/n had just recently unfollowed Max. No posts from either party has been released confirmed this.

↳ user288 highly doubt this lol

↳ redbulll24 prolly was an accident since he still follows her🤷‍♀️

↳ user444 wait, does anybody know if Y/n followed Charles before this? I just checked and they’re both following each other 🌚

replying to user444 I think so? I’m not sure tbh but it doesn’t make sense why she would follow him after all this time

replying to user444 she definitely didn’t, I remember cause I used to stalk her followers all the time

8,600 comments 20.6k likes

3 familiar bubble dots popped up on your chat with Charles. After what seemed like a minute or so, they disappeared. Then, they came back.

charles🫠

did you break up with him?

yeah, he says he still wants to work things out though.

…do you want to?

Nope.

Good.

I want to take you out.

what if someone sees us?

If that’s something you’re worried about, I can work around that. I told you, the other night wasn’t just causal.

Okay then. I’d love to go out with you☺️

I’ll send you the details ❤️

seen 12:04 pm

Suddenly, you were in high school all over again having a schoolgirl crush. It didn’t take long for Charles to let you know the time he would pick you up tomorrow. You were excited and weirdly intrigued. What type of date could either of you go on where the public wouldn’t see you?

max v.

why’d you unfollow me?

because we’re not dating anymore ??

we’re not done. I’ll have you again, for sure. 😴

what the hell weirdo. don’t make me block you.

seen 12:26 pm

Without thinking of how Charles would feel, you took a screenshot and sent it to him. Within seconds, Charles replied.

Charles🫠

I’ll make you forget him tomorrow, don’t worry sweetheart.

oh yeah? how so?

First, I’d fuck you dumb on my private jet we’re taking tomorrow. No one else would be around, so it’d be just the two of us. Then, we’ll look through online lingerie shops together while you’re sitting on my lap as I picture you wearing them. I’ll make sure you always have something pretty. Maybe I’ll even get you some nice Versace heels for funsies. By the end of the day, you’ll probably memorize my bank digits. Not that I mind, as long as I get to see you wear the stuff you’ve bought.

are you alone?

why, are you touching yourself?

can you answer my question first?

Yes, im alone. Now you answer mine.

Of course I am. I feel like you say the right words to get me going on purpose.

No, it wasn’t on purpose. How was I supposed to know you were that needy?

I’m sorry

Don’t be sorry, I love when your needy for me baby. Tell me how your touching yourself.

I have my fingers in my shorts. They don’t feel as good as you though. My body misses you.

I bet it does. Don’t worry though, I’ll see you tomorrow princess. Can you insert a finger into yourself?

I did it. I wish it was you instead :(

Don’t be sad, ma belle. Just keep touching yourself.

I’m close Charles. I wish you were here.

keep touching yourself sweetie.

I didn’t come. Max texted me.

Can you block him for me, cheríe? With the cherry on top.

Of course, anything for you.

Thank you 💗. I have to go but I’ll talk to you soon.

liked message

You felt as if you’d been robbed from you high. The pleasure you’ve felt until the moment Max texted you was something you’ve never experienced by just merely looking at words on a screen.

Max was still ‘asking’ to start over. Yet, it was something about the way he said it that proved he still truly didn’t think he did nothing wrong. He pointed the faults at you and hasn’t realized his own mistakes in the process. This had got you second guessing. What if you really were the one in the wrong? You quickly shook the thought away and scrolled through Instagram.

Nothing interesting had happened today and so you took a small walk around your neighborhood before returning back, sweaty and tired. When you arrived to your door, a large bouquet of flowers sat in the door step. It didn’t take much to figure out they were from Max. You like being gifted things. Receiving gifts was your gift language, something you’ve told Max plenty of times, yet only now he’s doing the gifting. You ponder for a moment. Maybe it was because of how pretty the flowers were that you began to second guess yourself. You looked at the pink wrapping and the white roses decorated with golden butterflies and fairy lights. You wondered if you’d been to hard on Max.

You tossed the flowers onto your couch, not caring about the fragility of them. The rest of the day had been spent with updates from Charles, who had been attending formula 1 meetings all day long. Once night came, you texted your good nights to each other and went to bed.

It didn’t take long for the sun to rise and finches to start singing. The color of the sky had been a beautiful light blue color with cotton candy shaped clouds. You got up and splashed water on your face and rubbed your inner eye boogers away. The time read 11:49 am as you checked your phone. No new notifications other than Charles good morning text had been sent to you, sadly. It’s your own fault for having no social life.

Since Charles was meant to pick you up at 1:30, you had a decent amount of time to get ready. You picked a white summer dress with spaghetti straps and floral prints. It reached towards your mid thigh, enough to be slightly scandalous yet still long enough to remain a proper dress for any occasion. For jewelry, you opted to a small pearl necklace and shiny small earrings. The shoes you were white platform 3 inch heels with a cute lace ankle buckle strap. After putting on light make up, it was 10 minutes until 1:30 and someone knocked on your door.

You fully expected it to be Charles, until it wasn’t. Max was standing in front of your door once again with a plain light blue button up and navy jeans.

“Where are you going looking so pretty?” Max stares at your body with intent as leaned against the door frame. A voice behind him spoke to him,

“She’s going with me.” Charles held a luxurious looking box and he pushed himself in front of Max and passed it to you.

Inside, there was about 50 small cut roses mixed in with a couple pink roses to make a heart effect. The black box had a bow around it. The brand was in another language you couldn’t pronounced in a gold and Italian style.

“These are beautiful, Charles.” You pressed a kiss to his cheek as Max had burned holes through his back.

“Those are okay. Where are mines though?” Max desperately looked through doorframe into the apartment.

“Somewhere on the couch. Probably dead by now.” You said, locking the door behind you and holding Charles hand. “We have somewhere to be, don’t we?”

He nods in agreement as you guys begin to walk away from Max who still stood in front of your apartment.

Click📸

The ride to the airport was talks about each others childhood and teenage years. His hand rested upon your thigh as he drove with his other arm. You’d found out Charles had 2 siblings. One older and another younger. He asked questions about, where you grew up, where your family’s from, and asked questions about your job. Your mother was a well-known model in the 80’s, so with the amount of traveling, you technically grew up everywhere. Naturally, you pursued a career in modeling. People loved you. Not because of your ‘beauty’ but many say it was the way you carried yourself and how you manipulated the energy around you to feel comforting and safe. Some called you a nepo baby, but really, that’s just what they want to believe. You believed modeling was made for you. You loved the sponsered gifts from extravagant brands, the free beauty products, the party invitations, traveling, but overall it was the way you felt on the runway that won your heart. Some may argue you were a little too materialistic, but if there’s no harm in it, what’s the problem? Max was sweet, most of the time, during your relationship. Though there was this one time, he ‘jokingly’ called you a gold digger. It was one of those phrases that just stuck with you for some reason. You didn’t believe it. You rarely asked for him to buy you stuff and so you were just confused, not offended. Besides, you had your own money. If there wasn’t a man to spoil yourself, you’d do it yourself. As you arrived to the port, Charles took a different entrance than the regular one. He pulled into a large lot with big green hangars in a row, each holding a different jet. There was only one jet outside the hangar. It was standard size yet smaller than the average public jet and by the looks of it ready to go on any command. Boarding the jet and taking off didn’t take long however the cocktails that you’ve both ordered did.

The attendee had finally returned with the cocktails and before drinking, you and Charles clinked your glasses. His hand rested on your thigh and you asked, “Where are we going?”

“Las Vegas. I was hoping you’d attend attend the gp there.” He said. He lightly traced circles around your thigh. You felt small shockwaves of electricity shooting towards your core. Even though he sat right next to you, you felt as if you were so far from each other.

“Don’t you think it’s too soon? The internet thinks Max and I only broke up barely a week ago.” You said, looking into his eyes while scanning his reaction.

“But…” his hand inches closer to your inner thighs, “I want to see you.” He quietly pleads into your ears as his hands travel further and further. There was an urge in your core begging him to go further, like it was thriving off his touch. His hands caress your inner thigh, squeezing them and teasingly brushing over your panties. One of his hands reach your head and pulls you in a breath taking kiss. It was deep and slow yet it was enough to get your heart beating like crazy. His other hand reached towards the inside of your dress, snapping the band of your panties against you in a teasing manner. He pulled away, grabbing your hand and lifting you from your seat towards his lap.

You sat on his lap, facing towards him while your legs were in an M position sticking out. Your heads clashed as your mouths merged together, intensifying the feeling in your crotch. His hands felt like fire as they traveled from your thighs to your waist. He ran them slowly up your waist during your kiss and then slightly pushes you further down his lap, letting you feel his hard-on. You feel your core soaking up and you find yourself wishing you were doing more than tongue kissing. Not breaking from the kiss, you grind down on him and as a result a soft groan left his mouth. “You drive me so crazy.” He whimpers, eyes never leaving you.

“I sure hope so.” You tell him, hands trailing down his chest down towards his crotch. He looks at you daringly, gasping when you cup his clothed crotch and slowly pull down the zipper to his pants. You take his member out, admiring the beauty that laid in front of you. His pink almost red tip with pre-cum sliding down looked so perfect in your hands. You slowly massage him up and down. He tilts his hand back and lets out a pornagraphic moan.

You suddenly let go of his shaft to turn around. With your back facing his face, you pulled down your panties and raised your pretty summer dress, flashing your ass for just a moment before aligning yourself to him. You sit down on him and instinctively the both of you let out noises of pleasure. You feel him slowly filling you up more and more until you finally sink down all the way. You begin to grind forward before you sharply get pushed back down.

“Stay still.” Charles warns you. “Let’s get you a new wardrobe.” You confusedly wait for Charles to pull out his laptop and place it in the movable table in front of you guys. He types in his passcode and searches up, ‘Victoria Secret’.

“Each set you get, you’re allowed to move once.” He whispers to your ear then pulled the computer closer towards you.

“But I want to move already.” You begged and whined.

“Then start shopping, baby.”

You scrolled down the page, quickly browsing to add the first thing you see into your cart. The first set was a light red pretty coquette set. The bra had beautiful lace designs with a tiny bow in the middle of your breasts.

“Wouldn’t you look so pretty in that?” He says, trapping your hips and grinding on his dick, finally creating some sort of friction for you. You were craving more movement by the second and so you glued your eyes to the screen.

The next set was a navy blue set that had a strap design around your hips. As you were about to add it to your cart Charles stops you, “You’d look absolutely beautiful in this but, I don’t like the color blue.”

You whined but continued scrolling until you found a maroon 3-piece lingerie set. It had heart shaped garters around the thighs and another connecting to your stomach with the ring of the garter stopping in the middle of your stomach, where your belly button was at. Charles had hummed in approval and moved your hips up and down with his hands stuck on your waist.

This had gone for what you thought was eternity. At the end there were 17 sets of lingerie in Charles cart which he had pay for (happily). The sets ranged from dark to light shades of red with the occasional pastel purple sets. It got to a point where you got so desperate that you outsmarted his game. You filtered the results the block all blue sets and after you started spam pressing ‘add to cart’.

After your post-orgasm bliss wore off, you had excused yourself to the restroom and roughly cleaned yourself up. You returned from the restroom and sat in your original seat next to Charles. He took your hand and entwined it with his. He rubbed circles around your hand before pressing a kiss to the top of your head. It didn’t take very much for the two of your to fall asleep, hands still entwined lovingly.

Charles had woken up groggily and let go of your hand to rub his eyes. He looked out his window seat into the dark sky and reached into his pocket for his phone. He grabbed it, only to find out it was yours. Yet something had caught his eyes. You had a message from a random number.

1+400-765-3479

Unblock me, Y/n.

He wasn’t sure who this was at first, then something in his brain clicked. He needed to be sure, though.

who’s this?

Max.

Charles had physically laughed. A little part of him wanted to show his claim on you yet there was still a rational part in him begging him not to be messy. Except, Charles is a messy person. Without a blink, he grabbed your hand and entwined it with his. He took your phone, took a picture, and sent the photo to Max. Max left him on read for the remainder of the flight.

A firm hand on your shoulder shook you awake. You learned outwards to the window and saw a bright blue sky then you looked to the right and saw Charles smiling at you.

“Morning, cheríe. We’ve landed, let’s go.” He said, gathering his carry on bag. You gathered all strength to get up and walk down the hoarding stairs. You felt a pit of hunger dwelling in your stomach and you suddenly wished you had ate before the flight.

“I have a special day for us. We’re going to this beautiful private beach and I’ve had someone set up a small picnic for us. You’ll like the beach, it’s beautiful.” He says, holding your hand down the stairs. His infamous ferrari was only a couple meters away.

“How come we didn’t come in that car on the way here?” You asked, curiously.

“Well, I had to ship it out here so I sent it out earlier than when we left. That’s why.”

You let out an ‘oh’ as he opened the door to the passenger side for you. He gets in his seat, turning on the roaring engine and drives out of the port. As always, his hand rests on your thigh rubbing circles into your skin. A sudden realization hits you.

“I didn’t pack any clothes.” You say, looking at him in disbelief.

“I didn’t either. We’ll hit the mall after we get to the beach.” He says, unworried.

The drive towards the beach was fairly quick. You figured it was because the port was close to the ocean. He pulled into what looked like a cliff only to surprise you by stepping off the cliff into well hidden stairs. The stairs were narrow and so he reached backwards to guide your hand down and ensure your safety. The stairs were long and risky yet you made it down with no issues. At the bottom, there was a small booth with a worker in it, giving a small nod towards Charles. Charles continues guiding you into the sand and he leads you to a gorgeous picnic set up. There was a white blanket across the sand with pillows placed elegantly in front of a white small table.

The table was placed under the shade of a white with hints of beige umbrella. China plates were set on the table with napkins on top of them shaped in elaborate designs. There was 2 fairly large wooden basket and a glass of wine next to it.

“How did you set this up?” You asked, walking around the beautiful set up. He sat down and you mimicked his actions.

“My brother’s in the country. I paid him to do it. I thought he would’ve just did something simple but he impressed me.” He reached towards the wooden basket. “Let’s see what he chose for our lunch.”

Inside the first basket, there were endless fruits such as watermelon, grapes, cherries, dragon fruit, and pineapple. Two silver sporks were set in the side of the basket along with extra sets of napkins. In the other basket there was plenty ingredients for a do-your-own sub. Two butter knives were also included. One to spread the mayo and another to cut the 2 medium sized baguettes.

The two of you began making your own, adding the right ingredients to satisfy your taste buds. You munched on your subway sandwiches until they finished, then the two of you fixed yourselves a plate of fruits. A comfortable silence was shared between the two of you as you took in the view in front of you.

Charles had pulled out 2 wine glasses and opened the wine bottle letting out a loud ‘pop’. The red liquid poured beautifully into the glass cups. Within moments, the two of you clinked your glasses and drank the liquid. You ached to be closer to Charles and so you moved yourself to his side. He wrapped of his arms around you and continued sipping the wine with the other.

“This is beautiful, Charles.” You murmur softly. He holds you tighter in response.

“You know I really like you?” He says, while staring off into the ocean. His eyes move to you only to find you already staring at him.

“I really like you too.”

He places a kiss on your head. “I hope one day we can walk through the entrance of the paddock holding hands in front of everyone.”

Your heart warms up. You’ve never felt happier than you do right now and you find yourself hoping that maybe, just maybe, you’ll be able to maintain this happiness forever.

#charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen #f1 #formula one #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc x female reader #girljournal #smut #sugarbaby

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ayaboba · 7 months

Text

YOU’RE FOREVERMORE

summary: times he appreciates you so much.

characters: albedo, ayato, xiao, wanderer, kazuha.

albedo — your endless compassion

albedo opened the door to a dimly lit bedroom, the only remaining light coming from the lopsided strings of fairy lights weakly glowing from one of the walls. crayons, costumes, and scrunched-up paper lay scattered all across the floor, leading towards the foot of the bed.

his eyes followed the trail, then softened. making sure to pick up the mess, his vision settled on two people, cozily embraced together under crimson clover covers.

then he picked up a drawing, left of the bedside table. there were plenty of people, but three people stuck out to him, their hands intertwined, smiles on their faces.

ayato — your overflowing faith in him

ayato never understood; no matter how long he spends thinking with that sharp mind of his, he’ll never know why you chose him.

he was cunning and shrewd. he held a position that frequently faced unwanted public attention without a rest. assassination attempts? too many to count.

but you knew ayato was simply too harsh on himself. in your eyes, he was a man who would do anything for his family. the family he treasured so dearly and the unrelenting love he so craved in return. perhaps you were too perfect, like someone from a dream, that he found it so hard to believe you were real.

xiao - your positivity

throughout his long, long lifetime, xiao suffered. an infinite abyss of pain and sadness indescribable. he found it hard to trust and love, those feelings rusty, yet still undeniably there.

he dreamt that all those beautifully warm emotions would somehow return. he dreamed, eyes gazing into the moonlit sky, wishing upon each star to give back what was rightfully his.

yes, the stars listened. but he would never expect that the feelings would come in the form of a human. an alluring human that never failed to brighten up his existence, always having something amusing to say—a laugh that was simply, wonderfully contagious. your positive outlook was admirable, xiao thought. he wanted to be like you. maybe not as lively, but just as happy.

wanderer - how you’re so understanding

like ayato, wanderer wonders why you stuck with him. he’s got a personality that annoyed the most patient, complimented with a sharp tongue that seemed impossible to not have something sarcastic to say. if he were you, he would steer away in the farthest direction. but it would be an outright lie to deny that he didn’t enjoy your presence next to his.

like the days when his soul feels like a void of hopelessness, you would be there, next to him, telling him in that oh-so-soft voice that he was enough, always enough for everyone and himself to appreciate.

don’t expect him to not reciprocate these actions; never has he forgotten all the things you’ve given. he’ll repay you ten times the love, because you are ten times worth it.

kazuha - your encouragement

kazuha has seen with his own eyes the cruellest and most traumatising events one could ever experience in their life. he puts on a facade of reserved tranquility and calmness, but sometimes that mask cracks just a bit, barely enough for anyone to notice. but of course, you do.

kazuha has always appreciated everything you’ve done for him; never has a moment shared with you been taken for granted. but now, the small, subtle actions and gentle words delivered at times when his heart begins to race and his palms are covered in sweat, it’s a whole new level of sympathy. he knows from the bottom of his heart that it’ll never get easier, but you make it all the more bearable. and that’s already far more than what he has ever hoped for.

#genshin fluff #genshin x reader #albedo x reader #ayato x reader #xiao x reader #wanderer x reader #kazuha x reader #genshin drabbles #anya writes ✧.*

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lovelyyandereaddictionpoint · 2 years

Note

Hey! I couldn't find any rules or anything so feel to ignore this if you want, but I really liked that slowly turning yandere ask so could you do that with with Azul, Idia, and Jade separately please? Or just the first two if it's too much, thank you!

Azul Ashengrotto

It makes sense that this one is slow

Azul is calculative and really sensitive

It’ll first start when he returns the photo

In the window between putting it back and coming back to Night Raven

“O. M. G. You are so. Freaking. Cute!!!”

You are cooing at this image he had tried so hard to erase

He’ll blush probably expecting you to just be someone who was overreacting

But come to find your just really vocal when your comfortable

“What a glow up, though? Went from -cinnabun to almost-a-sugardaddy-hun!”

He’s practically spitting out his drink as your looking at some other old photos that escaped his purge

From there he’s frantically trying to rationalize

Going to reaffirm his discovery by urging responses from you

“Prefect would you mind, telling me what exactly makes me, supposedly, ‘a snack’”

“Oh it's definitely your beauty mark, or maybe its your style, or its definitely your eyes literally like periwinkle diamonds.”

“T-thanks!”

He’s so whipped

And as uncomfortable as he may seem he is living off of the near-heatstroke embarrassment he goes through

And even when he’s not nearly passing out from your words

He loves how sweet you are in general

When he’s not baiting you for a response you just compliment him when he’s doing random stuff

“Hey Azul, can you explain this concept to me? You’re like really smart and I-”

“Fine, but you have to come to the Monstro lounge while you work through this sheet.”

This feeling is his

And he’s more than eager to bind anyone in a deadly contract because they feel this way

Forget about sending the leech twins

He’s doing it themselves

He’ll get more bolder the more you are encroached upon

“Would you be so kind as to compliment me. I’ve been feeling especially perturbed lately.”

Jade Leech

He notices you when you’re investigating for Magift tournament

He thought it was cute to see a weak little shrimpy trying to solve big-fish problems

From then on he keeps an eye out

You’re always up to something so it's entertaining to keep updated on your activities

“You…look pretty good with an eel-tail?”

He finds himself surprisingly shocked by you

Whether its cause you whisper your real thoughts loud enough for him to hear

Or because you actually had the balls to fight Azul

His intrigue turns to love

As he drinks in your compassion and care for your friends

And just general demeanor

He follows you on his own time

Mountaineers club?

No, (Y/n)’s club

His love for you stems into his love for learning about the land and its properties

So the flower you sat on during gym

Keeping that in his pocket forever

The rock you looked at that reminded you of your friend

Analyzed it then Crushed it but kept the pieces to study for later

He won’t outwardly chase off those around you

But he has no problem picking off the ones you're sure not to notice

Everynow and then he’ll invite you on a hike

Or give you a pass to the Monstrolounge

If only to be allowed to feel study you more closely

“Would you care to join me for a nature walk? I promise this is purely innocent.”

Idia Shroud

It's a long standing love that blooms at your appearance

He initiates it on his own

As one of the heads at STYX he’s encouraged to study the unkown about overblots

What's wrong with venturing a little

“This is just like that one anime…”

Interdimensional travel, a refusal of your existence, and alongside a monster

Truly a live manifestation of something he would be watching

So cameras placed outside your dorm

And Ortho’s livefeed should he see you on his rounds

“Oh sorry didn’t mean to bump into you!”

Its an accident

So minor you don’t really recount it as the first time you spoke to him

But he does

Ooh he does

When you just graze your hand as you pick up his fallen book

or how you press your hand against his arm under his sleeve as you checked to make sure he’s alright

It takes everything in him to fight the nosebleed that threatens to creep up

“Ah, are you sick?”

“N-no. I gotta go!”

He runs off but that isn’t the end

Far from it

He realizes that perhaps this supposed isekai protagonist was really the love interet for the genius otaku

Well he’ll want to make sure that he knows everything about you for when he does gain the courage to woo you

So now the cameras are in your room, in the bathroom…another in your room

He slowly delves into his fantasy of a romance between you and him

But he’s not completely delusional

And he’s not so caught up in his fantasy that he doesn’t have a plan

Oh no

He has multiple plans for multiple possibilities

When he finally does get to talk with you immediately the plan that included forcefully taking you is dismissed

….kinda…

“(Y/n)’s not like the other npcs…their the target, Ortho. That’s why I have to do this.”

#yandere twisted wonderland x reader #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yanderexrea #lovelyyandereaddictionpoint #yanderes #yandere azul ashengrotto #yandere jade leech #yandere idia shroud #yandere idia x reader #yandere jade x reader #yandere azul x reader #twisted wonderland #twst

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awkwardgtace · 10 months

Text

Intimidating Presence

day 20 intimidate

next one that fits the trope @jakersdaboss

honestly this title is probably bad titles are hard i don't have a good one lol

Dabria is tired of the gossip in the town when the nearby giant watches them. She decides talking to the giant will solve the issue

Intimidating Presence

“It came back today”

“I heard it stomping, I almost thought I heard its stomach.”

“It looks fed why would it keep coming here?”

“That monster’s eaten plenty, it doesn't need our village as a part of it.”

“Something has to be done before it decides to make a snack out of us.”

“It might get bored if we stay cautious, just don’t let it see anything when it’s looking. It’ll be fine.”

Dabria glared at the gossiping townsfolk as she passed. This was the third week of them acting like the giant was some heartless monster. They hadn’t hurt anyone or even gotten that close. They would just come near the end of the day, when the sun was setting and watch. It had her curious, but if they wanted to kill anyone it would have happened by now.

She slammed the door as she arrived home. The things on the wall shook from the force. This was getting ridiculous. Stalking through her home she went searching for her boots and a hiking bag. She would get to the bottom of this. Those gossipers would learn to be quiet. Judging someone from their appearance was just rude. They should have learned from their gossip about her.

“What are you doing?” she jumped when her husband’s voice sounded. She turned around, a bit of a blush on her face. She hadn’t told Vitus her idea, hadn’t even thought it all the way through. He looked tired, his usually cleanly tied hair was a mess. The bags beneath his green eyes screamed for sleep. She walked up, wrapped her arms around him and rested her head on his shoulder.

“I’m going to go talk to the giant?” she said. The chuckle from Vitus made her smile. He wrapped his arms around her, kissing the top of her head. Sometimes it was easy to forget they were the same height. He felt like a giant most of the time.

“Oh? Were you going to tell me or was I going to find out when you never came to bed tonight?”

“I was going to tell you… probably.” His arms tightened around her.

“Dabria, are you sure about this?”

“I don’t know. They haven’t hurt anyone, just watched us. And all those people gossiping all the time is just cruel. At least knowing would be better than all of this.” She pulled away to look in his eyes. “Vitus, are you going to stop me?”

He leaned forward and kissed her quickly. “No, just come back safe. I know you can take care of yourself. Besides, you wouldn’t run headfirst into danger without me. Unless that was you asking for me to come along?”

Dabria laughed and pulled away from him. She had to finish packing to head out. The giant would be leaving around sunset and that wasn’t too far off. She was going to follow them. “Far from it. It wouldn’t do to take the only doctor off on a dangerous adventure now would it?”

“I guess that’s fair. I’m going to take a nap, wake me up before you go?”

“Of course I will.”

Dabria passed the day gathering anything she could think of. A lantern for the dark, food in case she got lost. A map, a compass, water, even a book if she had to wait for them to come back. When she woke Vitus up just as the sun set he laughed at her. She had probably gone overboard, but she wanted to be prepared. Another quick kiss and she was off. The only thing left behind the thing that would tell the giant what she was.

Just as she expected, the giant was watching the town. Their face was covered by shadow. It made it impossible to tell what they were planning. If they were up to something bad it would have happened by now. She kept repeating that as she walked through town. It wasn’t that late, but it was horribly quiet. No one in town wanted to risk facing the giant’s wrath. A wrath she doubted existed.

She managed to reach the edge of the village just as the giant stood. From here they actually looked a bit smaller than she’d heard giants should be. A lot smaller actually, the trees were just at their height. They turned around, world shaking steps leading far from the village. She almost wanted to call out to them.

“Thank the heavens it’s leaving. It looks so hungry every time it watches us. That stomach looks plenty full already.”

“I still say the guard should chase it, maybe even kill it. We don’t know when it will get bored.”

“What if it wants us as toys?”

“Even worse, what if it wants pets?” The world shook as the giant walked away.

“I don’t know what’s worse, being a toy, a snack or a pet? I mean those hands-”

“Oh quiet down already!” Dabria yelled. The two peeking out of a window jumped at her shout. “You know nothing about them. If they were going to hurt us they would have by now.”

“What makes you say that? What is all that you’re carrying?”

“Nothing you need to worry about. Go back to your pointless gossiping. I’ll just prove you wrong like always.” Dabria started walking away from the rude people of this town. Sometimes she wanted to leave, but Vitus was all they had for medicine. Despite how foolish some outspoken members were, neither could leave the kind ones.

“You’re gonna die if you go out there! Better not take the doctor along with you!”

“I’m alone, obviously he’s not coming.”

Dabria kept walking, ignoring what the gossipers shouted after her. The giant's steps were still vibrating through the ground. She wondered if they even knew how it felt to others. She’d ask about it once they met.

As her trek into the forest truly began she realized she would be walking for a while. She used the footprints the giant left to guide her. Another sign that didn’t add up, the one she knew was much bigger than this. She shook off her thoughts, refocusing on her goal. Tonight she’d meet the giant.

The walk through the forest was mostly quiet. Now and then a strange sound was carried on the wind. It made her curious, but the giant could always help her find it. They were probably just in between their travels. It was normal enough for a giant to linger near a town, it was half of why she knew anything about them. One that would be around her home village. They visited every so often, even helped when others got lost.

The noise was getting louder as she walked. Something about it was familiar. She couldn’t quite pin it down, but didn’t want to let that distract her. She had to find the giant and talk to them. Although it might have been smarter to wait for them near the village. One day she needed to start thinking her plans through. That was for another night though. Tonight she had to find the giant.

After a while of walking under the stars she saw a clearing. A bit of hope entered her chest, the footprints led there. She ran forward with a burst of energy, pushing away the worry as the sound grew louder. She paused just before entering the clearing to look for the giant or the source of the sound.

Dabria’s heart broke when she found both. The giant was sitting in the clearing, knees hugged to their chest. From what she could see this was a young boy alone in the woods. She couldn’t believe the villagers had been gossiping about this poor boy for weeks. The source of the sound were the sobs that wracked the child’s body. She took a step forward, a twig cracked from her weight.

The boy’s head snapped up. His eyes were cat-like, reflecting strangely in the dark. She could just make out the golden color as he tried to glare at her. She walked out of the shadows and tried to get closer. The boy actually growled at her, she had never known giants could growl. Bared fangs shone under the stars, but that only made her more concerned.

There wasn’t anger in the eyes meeting her though. This was a scared child his size didn’t change that. She took another step, but he leaned back. He was afraid of her, that only made her more concerned. She sat down where she was, pulled her bag off her back, and pulled out some of the food she packed.

“I know it isn’t much for you, but I skipped dinner and don’t like to eat alone,” she said, a smile on her lips. The boy was frozen for a few seconds, but he did eventually lean forward. “Would you care to join me?”

Dabria held out some of what she brought. It was just an apple, the other sitting in her lap. She wasn’t sure what to expect in the reaction. The boy didn’t jump at the chance to get closer, studying her. He was smart, trusting a stranger like this wouldn’t be the best thing to do. So she waited with her arm outstretched for him to answer.

Eventually he did move. He brought a hand closer to her, moving it right past the apple to surround her. She tried not to let her fear at his choice show, he was scared and wanted to scare her. She wasn’t running from a child who was clearly on his own. His hand stayed partly wrapped around her, but there was room for her to run.

“Run, I-I’ll hurt you. I’ll do all the things you people think I will. Every single one,” he said. His voice was hoarse. Most likely from lack of use. It only made her more upset. She didn’t react to the empty threat, instead setting the apple on the top of his hand.

“I’m not running, and I don’t think you’re going to do anything. To me or anyone else in the village,” she smiled again. All of this was laced with hope that he’d listen. Trust her even.

“Liar. I know what you all say about me. I-I’ll do it. You better run.”

“I’m not running so I guess you’ll have to do those bad things, won’t you?”

Silence settled around them. She could hear the soft bustle of forest life as he considered her words. He could act on them. Hurt her, make her a toy, a pet, or a snack, but she knew he wouldn’t. The golden eyes staring at her weren’t ones here to hurt anyone. They were lonely and scared, something she fully intended to fix.

The fingers around her started to shake. She stared up past the hand at the boy. He looked more afraid than when she arrived. He started to close the bit of space he left. It made her wonder how much space she’d take up in his hand when she was standing. Either way she kept watching him as tears pricked his massive eyes.

“I-I can do it. Really I will. You should run before it’s too late,” he said. The boy was trembling and Dabria grew more worried about him. She reached out a hand and set it on the fingers around her.

“You can, but you don’t have to. It doesn’t look like you want to. We can always just talk instead,” she tried to squeeze the finger her hand was on to reassure him. That made him pull away from her. Fear in his golden eyes.

“Y-you’re just here to make me leave right? Go away, I won't go near that place again.”

“I’m not here to make you leave.” The boy jumped. “I came out here to talk to the giant and find out what they’ve been doing. Now I’m out here to talk to you. So… I’m Dabria, what’s your name?”

“Felix… I’m Felix.”

“Nice to meet you Felix. Would you be willing to tell me why you were crying?”

Dabria noticed the apple had fallen when he pulled his hand away. She carefully stood to pick it up. Felix flinched and slid back from her. It hurt her heart. A young boy was so scared of her. Scared of someone who usually couldn’t do much to hurt him. Unless he knew what her eyes meant. She doubted that though.

“D-don’t come closer,” he whined. Dabria moved slowly, exaggerating her movements. She bent to grab the apple and returned to where she was sitting. Dropping the fruit in the bag.

“Don’t worry. I just wanted to get the apple I tried to give you. I won’t get any closer,” she promised. Felix nodded at her, seeming more tense than before. She took her seat on the ground and looked up at him again. “So instead of why you were crying, how about why you watch the village?”

Felix buried his head in his knees. It didn’t look like he wanted to talk about anything at all. Dabria nodded to herself and reached into her bag again. She pulled out a book that she brought along. It wasn’t too much for a child, at least not when she knew the parts to skip.

“Ok, so you don’t tell me anything. I’ll just read a book. I hope you don’t mind, but I like to read outloud.”

Felix didn’t answer so she opened the book and started to read. At least she pretended to read. Instead she told a story that she knew as a child. One that told of a giant who traveled the world. Acting as a hero for the small people around them. She smiled as Felix reacted. His eyes blown wide in wonder.

As she continued the story Felix started to relax. He stretched out his legs next to her. His foot was probably taller than her. She took the chance to look him over. The clothes he wore were covered in holes. His face had dirt on it. This child was still young, at most six, but more likely five. She wasn’t leaving him alone no matter what.

By the time she reached the end of her ‘book’ he’d leaned close. Hovering over her in a way others might be worried over. All she could see on his face was the excitement as the giant hero fought a villain. As they won the day and were celebrated by everyone. Human and giant alike in honor of this one hero. She smiled up at him when she closed the book.

“The end,” she said. Felix’s eyes were filled to the brim with hope. There was a solid minute before he realized what he was doing, how he hovered. She hadn’t even noticed his hand set next to her so he could lean closer. Now she understood, he wanted pictures with the story.

Felix’s cheeks turned bright red as she looked at him. He quickly pulled back, sitting far from her again. His legs started moving, but she reached out and grabbed his pants before he pulled completely away. He froze as soon as her fingers brushed the fabric. He looked scared again, the awe already fading.

“You don’t need to scrunch up again, I can tell another story if you want.”

Felix stared at her. It was the first time since finding him she saw the predatory looks giants often had. Looks that she knew other humans sometimes found scary, but she knew what they really meant. That they were trying to see the smaller things around them. To understand the world that never truly seemed to suit them

He didn’t pull his legs back. She took her hand away and watched the giant child lean forward again. A hand set next to her, fingers up this time. He was scared still, but not pulling away. It was something she considered a win. Something making progress.

“You… really aren’t gonna send me away?” he asked. His voice shook, the trembles spread through his body. Dabria stood walking slowly towards the hand near her. She put one of her own on the tip of his finger.

“I’m really not here to send you away. I’m doing a pretty bad job if I was,” she laughed. A tear splashed down near her. Looking up she found the crying face of the giant child.

“I-I just wanted to watch… I-I…”

“Shush, it’s ok. You can come watch, even talk to us.”

“N-no. I heard them talking… they don’t like me, call me a monster… I-I am one…”

The sound of sobbing echoed around her. It was just as bad as she heard on her way here. It made the body of this child shudder. Even worse than his fear. She looked at the fingers near her, making a choice as soon as she noticed the way they trembled.

“Felix, have you ever picked up a human or a small animal?” He nodded. “Ok, then why don’t you pick me up?”

“I-I-I…”

“It’ll be ok, I trust you. Would you rather me climb on your hand?”

Felix shook his head again. Slowly fingers that would grow to tower over her wrapped around her. She was held loosely as they closed around her. His other hand was beneath her feet before she had a chance to dangle. Both his hands brought her up as he sat up straight again. They were still trembling and the sobs hadn’t stopped.

“Good job, can you bring me closer to you now?”

“O-ok.”

Felix brought her close. He held her right in front of his face. She waited for him to pull his hand from around her. It took time for him to do it. She watched him move it below the one she stood on. The whole time she struggled to keep standing straight. The trembles traveling through his body wanted to knock her down. She wouldn’t let that happen.

Using all her strength she moved forward. Barely able to reach Felix’s face. She spread her arms wide and pressed against him. He immediately met her, pressing his whole face into her body. Tears fell again, soaking her as he cried. She didn’t mind.

“It’s ok Felix, you can cry all you need,” she whispered.

The moon traveled through the sky as he cried. It was a lake’s worth of tears and she didn’t care. Not for one moment did she pull away from the child that so desperately needed someone in that moment. Eventually he moved. Pressing one of his hands to her back and holding her more tightly. She didn’t feel fear for a moment.

Fingers wrapped around her again. Tears never stopped. She started to run her hand over his skin. Just a small reassurance. His grip was tight, but far from enough to hurt her. She closed her eyes and pressed her forehead against him. She wouldn’t stop this until he was ready.

“S-sorry,” he whispered. His hands started to move, but she smacked her hand against his fingers.

“Don’t be sorry,” she said. She pressed her hands into his skin again. “Do you feel better now? You can keep crying if you need to.”

“M-mom and dad used to say I shouldn’t cry around humans… It’s not good to do that. Th-they said humans wouldn’t like it…”

“Well I’m here and I don’t mind you crying. I’d rather you cry until you don’t need to anymore. You don’t even have to tell me why.”

“I miss mom and dad. They told me to run and they’d find me, but they haven’t. I-I’m scared they aren’t coming. I’m… I’m really lonely…”

“Oh Felix, how long has it been?”

“A-a while. Humans made me leave the other places they told me to wait. This is the last one.”

“Well you aren’t being made to leave here. You can wait as long as you need. You can even stay with me.”

Felix pulled her away. His fingers left her again and she watched him wipe his eyes. She noticed a bright red mark on his hand. A gasp left her that had his hand beneath her again right away. His fingers were around her immediately, but that didn’t change her worries.

“What happened to your hand?” she asked. Felix pulled his hand away from her and looked at the mark.

“Oh… I tried to look at a fuzzy brown animal. I thought it was cute, but it got mad and scratched at me. It’s fine,” he said. He shoved his hand behind his back. Dabria crossed her arms and looked up at the giant boy who only seemed ashamed of his injury.

“Felix, why don’t we go back to my house? My husband is the doctor in the village. We can have him look at the cut on your hand.”

“No the-the other humans are always talking about me. They’ll be mad and make me leave or worse…”

Dabria waved him closer, happy when the boy listened. She set her hands on his face and stared into one of his golden eyes. “If they do anything then I’m leaving with you. You aren’t going to be alone again. You’ll have me no matter what.”

“Promise?”

“I promise. So let’s go ok? Just take us back to the village and I’ll tell you where to go after.”

“Shouldn’t I put you down?”

“Nope, it’s a lot faster if you carry me. Oh just let me down so I can get my bag, ok?”

Felix nodded. His fingers wrapped around her again, just like when he lifted her. He pulled his lower hand away before lowering her to the ground. It wasn’t the best way for him to handle her, but that was something to figure out later. They’d both be learning for a while. She grabbed her bag before turning back to him. She watched the young boy shift to be kneeling. His weight was enough to make her stumble.

There was the smallest wonder if she was making a mistake. If her life as she had lived until now would be ruined accepting this giant into her home. It faded away when his golden eyes locked on her again. His size didn’t matter, the eyes staring at her felt more like a scared animal than a threat. She wouldn’t abandon him. She was worried how he’d look in the sun, if his hair was a mess or his clothes were even worse than she could see with the moon.

“A-are you ready? M-Miss Dabria?”

Dabria smiled, walking a bit forward. “I’m ready, and just Dabria is fine. I already said I trust you, I mean it Felix.”

“O-ok.”

Fingers wrapped around her again. His other palm was beneath her feet before she could think. It seemed like he was just the type to grab, it wasn’t such a bad thing. He was careful every time. She was lifted up to his chest, held near the panicking heartbeat of a young child. Another thing that broke her heart.

He kept his hold on her as he stood. The height he had was still intimidating to see despite sitting in his hand. She couldn’t even start to guess how big he’d be when fully grown. If he was even a normal height for giants now. There was so much she didn’t know when it came to taking care of him. So much she’d make sure to learn.

The first step Felix took made her suck in a breath. It had his fingers tightening around her as he moved. He paused, looking down at her with fear. He was just as nervous as she was. A nervousness that she would find a way to ease. She thought about it for only a moment before having a solution to his worries.

“Felix, why don’t you just curve your hand against your chest to hold me? That way you have a hand free.”

Felix didn’t say anything, but did as she suggested. The fingers slipped away and she was pressed against his chest. It was more than she expected, but another thing to work on. He took to walking again. This time his steps seemed more confident. She smiled as he walked, if he was confident she could be a little uncomfortable.

As he walked she thought about Vitus. He didn’t think she was going to bring the giant home, he would have said something if he did. She was worried this time it might push him too far. That he wouldn’t stand by her when she made a crazy decision. He stood by her through the gossip in every village they visited, but adopting a giant child might be too far.

Felix’s hand tensed around her. That just proved it didn’t matter. If Vitus wouldn’t stand by her this time then she’d leave. She didn’t have his medical knowledge, but she had the best chance of caring for a giant. She could get the clothes and shelter he’d most likely need. Felix’s hand flattening made her squeak as she fell back.

Looking around she saw the village nearby. She climbed to her feet to look around for a moment. It was dark, no sign of anyone. The only light she could see was the one from a window in her own home. Vitus probably fell asleep with it on. He would usually try to wait up for her, but his limit was always near dawn. Her own heart was hammering at how he’d act. If he’d just adopt the giant child like she had.

“Do you see that house on the other edge of the village? With a glow to it?” she asked. Felix nodded. “Just head over there. That’s where I live with Vitus. Where will work out a place for you to stay too. You shouldn’t be sleeping alone in the woods.”

Felix nodded again. He curved his hand up a bit this time, more like she’d first intended. He took his steps slowly. Each one left no sign of his movement. He did know how to be careful around humans, another good thing. Teaching him caution would have been a bit hard, still doable. Although it did stand out he didn’t speak.

“Felix,” she called his name, but got no response. Her home was almost below him by now. Traveling with a giant was a much better speed. “You can talk when you hold me like this. I’m not going to break. I didn’t earlier.”

“...ok,” he whispered. It was better than the silence. He was too aware of himself now that they were at the village. She’d work on his comfort later. “We’re here… I think.”

“Yup, just let me down and I’ll be right back ok?” Felix slowly lowered himself to be sitting. Then he wrapped his fingers around her and pulled her from his palm, letting her down just outside her home. The home she was a bit worried about entering. “Now wait here while I get what we need for your hand, ok sweetheart?”

“Ok.”

Dabria walked in, dropping her bag to the side as she moved. Slowly she made her way through the house, grabbing what Vitus normally used for wounds. She replaced some things. A sheet rather than gauze. A bucket for cleaning it rather than the small dish Vitus always used. All that was left was what he used to sanitize it.

“Vitus, honey are you up?” she called into the house. Above her she heard a shifting chair followed by creaking steps as he came down to see her. If she hadn’t learned to read him she’d think he was unphased. His eyes had widened just a bit, his lip twitched slightly. He was confused. “Where do you keep all the disinfectant? I think I’ll probably need what we have on hand.”

“What are you doing?” he asked. It didn’t stop him from going around the room to gather a number of his own tools. She pouted when he grabbed the small disinfectant he always kept nearby.

“Felix is hurt and I’m going to take care of him. Also I told him he could stay with us.” There was a bit of fear behind her words. How would Vitus react?

“Felix? Is that the giant?” Dabria nodded and Vitus hummed. Sometimes it was even hard for her to read him and she hated that. This was one of those times. “Well, let’s go take care of his wound.”

Dabria smiled as Vitus followed behind her. She hadn’t told him that the giant was a child yet, but that shouldn’t matter much. She hoped. Together they walked out, she grabbed her staff on the way. There was no chance she’d leave this child unsheltered for the night. When they walked out she bit back a laugh.

Felix was on his knees with his head on the ground. One hand near the door as he tried to look in after her. He was such a curious child. His eyes filled with fear when he saw Vitus and it froze him in place. Vitus shot her a look, one she still couldn’t quite read. He stepped forward, but that got Felix moving. He sat up straight, the movement sent both her and Vitus stumbling back. As soon as she looked up she saw tears in his eyes.

“I-I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” Felix mumbled. She saw the way he tensed, ready to jump up. Before she could say anything, Vitus stepped forward.

“Don’t be sorry, I’d be curious too. You can look inside more tomorrow, the sun will make it easier,” he said. Dabria smiled, she could hear it in his voice already. Vitus would stand by her this time too. “I’m Vitus, Dabria said you were hurt, can I see it?”

Felix hesitantly brought his injured hand close. Vitus stepped forward, not even blinking at the giant hand. Felix was trembling again. After a few seconds Vitus turned to her and grabbed the bucket with soap she’d brought outside.

“This will sting, but we want to make sure you stay healthy while it heals. Ok?”

“Ok,” Felix’s voice was a whisper again. He was such a kind child.

Vitus focused on cleaning the wound. Felix actually growled at the contact, but Vitus didn’t even flinch. It didn’t stop the giant child from looking guilty. Dabria walked up and offered Vitus the towel she’d brought outside. He dried the wound before holding up the disinfectant he’d brought out.

“You know this doesn’t need as much as you thought,” he smiled. Felix twitched when it hit his wound, this time knocking them both back. Neither were bothered, but tears fell from the giant’s eyes. Vitus just took the sheet from her and quickly put it on Felix’s hand. “You’re doing a great job Felix.”

“He’s right, most of the time no one would sit still like you,” she said.

“Felix, how old are you?”

“F-five… but I’m gonna be six soon!” His voice was louder than it had been before. He quickly shrunk back, but Vitus chuckled.

“You’re the calmest five almost six year old I’ve treated. I need you to hold your hand up a bit so I can tie this around your palm.” Felix did as he was asked. Vitus shot her a look as he tied the sheet. “There, we’ll keep it clean so it heals safely.”

“Thank you.”

Dabria smiled at the words. Felix would fit in soon enough. Vitus gathered everything she brought out and took it back inside. She had to figure out how to make him shelter. Her staff would make it possible to get a home built, but she needed an idea of how big to make it. She didn’t want to make it again every few years.

“Dabria?” Vitus’s voice made her jump. He’d come out with a book she hadn’t seen before. “With a few measurements we can probably guess how tall he’ll be later to make a place for him.”

Felix had started to loom again. Such a wholesome curiosity. She smiled at Vitus as he came over to her. Holding open the book she took a look. She knew how tall her staff was and that would give her what she needed.

“Felix, can you put your hand flat on the ground for me?” she asked. Felix did exactly that, tensing when she brought her staff close. She decided to distract him as she measured his hand. “Did you know when we moved here they told mean rumors about me too?”

“Why? You’re human…” His innocent question actually made Vitus laugh. Humans knew what her traits meant, a young giant never would. It did make the giant child shrink back.

“She isn’t human, she’s a witch,” Vitus smiled. He moved closer; he was just as calm around this giant child as she was. “Humans like to tell rumors about what they don’t understand. That includes someone bigger than us, or our size and a little special.”

“I’d say I’m more than a little special. You did happen to marry one of the strongest witches of this generation.”

It was a point of pride she’d never ignore. It helped that she finished measuring just as she spoke. Looking in the book she had a guess, a guess that left her heart pounding. He’d get a lot bigger, big enough to be a threat even she would struggle against. That nervous look in his eyes made the nerves budding in her heart die.

“What does that mean?” Felix asked. Dabria held her staff at arms length, turned horizontally. A glow started to emanate in a circle around her.

“You should make sure to change our house while you’re at it. He shouldn’t be separated from us if he’s staying with us,” Vitus said. It made her smile, his acting like this is part of why she loved him. She closed her eyes, focusing on her conjuring spell. There was enough catalyst left in her staff for this. A whine came from above her. “Felix, it’ll be alright. She’s not doing anything bad, it’s why we live on the edge of town. The clinic is deeper in the village.”

Dabria smiled to herself at the reassurance. She could almost see Vitus rubbing Felix’s hand as he spoke. She let herself return to her focus. The goal of the house that they could all live in. One with rooms that were both their size and Felix’s. Where he wouldn’t be made to feel out of place and neither would they.

“Conjura!” she shouted. Her eyes opened, the brilliant red glowing from them always left her a bit concerned. It didn’t matter as the home she conjured pieced together around them. It didn’t take long for it to complete.

She fell back, the spell itself taking all her energy. Usually Vitus caught her, but this time large fingers wrapped around her easily. She looked up, the glow from her eyes casting a strange red on Felix. He looked nervous and excited exactly what she wanted. She couldn’t move though.

“I- are- uh-,” he started and stopped. Vitus’s hands came to rest on her arm.

“Don’t worry. She’s tired. Just like I’m sure you are. We should all get some sleep tonight. Felix, we'll deal with the village tomorrow. You have a home here with us.”

“We need to show him his room Vitus,” she mumbled.

“I doubt you even know where it is, did you put any thought into the layout this time?”

“Yes! Well… a bit more than last time.”

They laughed, but the fingers beneath her tensed. She looked up at Felix, fear still pouring from his face. She had an idea, one that might tip Vitus over the edge. She would offer it anyway, anything for the giant she’d already taken in as her child.

“Felix, do you want me to stay with you tonight?” she asked. Vitus tightened his hold on her arm, but it wasn’t the warning kind of grip. She knew when he thought she’d gone too far.

“We can both stay with you if you want,” he said.

Felix didn’t actually say anything. He just wrapped his fingers around them both and pulled them close. A young child that had been on his own didn’t need to speak when the offer was right there. He stood and looked around a bit before seeming to decide he just wanted to sleep where he was. He curled up on his side, Dabria and Vitus held against his chest.

“Is… is this ok?” he whispered.

“It’s fine Felix, get some sleep. We’ll be here in the morning,” she said.

It didn’t take long for him to fall asleep. The hands around them loosened, letting both Dabria and Vitus get more comfortable. They sat next to Felix’s chest, the calm breaths something Dabria was happy to hear. Vitus had his arms around her, but both their heads were against Felix.

“You went out and adopted a giant child tonight,” he whispered with a laugh.

“It wasn’t my plan, but yes I did,” she sighed. A smile wide enough to split her face in two as one of Felix’s hands moved to cover them in his sleep.

“I can’t say much, I saw him and knew if you hadn’t I would have.”

“You know, I was a little worried this time I might have gone too far. It’s not like you grew up with a giant next door like I did.”

“Well, I can’t really leave a kid all on his own. Size be damned. We’re leaving if they argue tomorrow.” She wrapped her arms around Vitus and squeezed.

“You’re the best man I could have married.”

“You’re the best witch I could have met. Get some rest, you’ll be busy with him tomorrow while I deal with the town.”

“Vitus… you really are the best.” He pulled her closer, she let her eyes fall closed. “Why were you still up? I know you usually try to be awake, but it’s pretty close to dawn. You normally fall asleep around now, even with the lights on.”

“I was waiting to tell you I finished the test for why you’ve been so tired. Felix will have a little sibling within a year.”

Dabria’s eyes snapped open. She knew he was running one of those tests he did on her blood, but she didn’t know it would turn into that. Her heart raced as ideas flooded her mind. All the things their family could do, not a single one missing their new giant son. She fell asleep dreaming of the child they’d add to this family they just formed.

In the morning she was woken by loud banging at their door. She didn’t even know how close it was. Felix’s hands around her tightened, it wasn’t a dream. She did notice that Vitus wasn’t there. She squirmed out of the nervous giant’s hand to look at him, golden eyes filled with fear.

“She did it again, didn't she?” It was one of the gossiping villagers. “She brought that monster here. We’ve ignored what she is, but this is too far.”

She rested a hand on Felix’s fingers, digging them into his skin. They weren’t getting chased out. Even if the village didn’t like them, she’d go to where she found him and they’d live there.

“Enough!” Vitus’s voice echoed in the now giant sized home. “If you intend to try to chase our son out of here you’ll be losing both of us as well. I’ll happily trust him over all of you with how you treated my wife when we arrived. Make your choices wisely.”

The door slammed, another echo that settled in the silence. Tears splashed nearby. Felix started shaking. Vitus walked in and she could see how angry he was. Just how many times had that happened already? She always slept heavily after such a big spell. A house for a fully grown giant was no easy feat, even for her.

Vitus walked right up to Felix and held a hand up to him. The giant child leaned forward, as if it was something they’d done a thousand times. He stopped with his face just a little out of Vitus’s current reach. Vitus didn’t care, he reached out further and stood on the tips of his toes to touch the face of the child they took in during the night.

“Don’t worry Felix, we’re family now. They aren’t going to get us to send you away. We either live here together or we move out of the village together,” Vitus said.

The hand near her left only to wrap around Vitus. He was pulled up as Felix sat up straight. The child was crying again with the man against his face. Dabria smiled, happy to see Vitus acting just as she did. They were a family. A human, a witch, a giant, and eventually a half witch. They’d be quite the strange group, but all of them would stick together.

—--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Felix sat outside of the home his human size parents had made so long ago. He didn’t need to go hunting for the village and he had run out of fabric so he was bored. Bored happened a lot for him, but that was partly because of why he ran out of fabric so often.

“Felix!” a child shouted. He looked down at his leg where the fabric his sister had conjured in practice was being used for a slide. He’d moved his leg at some point, knocking down the ladder the kids were using today. “Help us up!”

“What if I don’t want to?” he smirked. It was met with dozens of whines as he fixed the ladder anyway. He set his hand down, quickly gaining a handful of unbelievably tiny humans. It scared him a bit how much trust they had in him. They were so small, he could mess up. It had been like this for years though.

“Felix!” A woman called as she ran up to him. “I need you to watch Cedric for a few hours. Just enough to get laundry done!”

“A-are you sure?” It had never been easy to believe the humans wanted him to hold the youngest of the children. Still the tiny human Cedric, one who could barely walk, was dropped on his palm and the woman ran off.

“Thank you so much! I’ll be back by sunset.”

“Hide me! Hide me!” This voice he knew very well, his sister came running from the house towards his unoccupied hand. She grabbed at his hand to turn it over so he’d lift her from the ground. “Felix please! You have to hide me.”

Felix sighed, but carefully pinched his sister’s sides. It was hard to believe she was only a little over twice the width of his fingers. Still he lifted her up and up and up until he had her meeting his eyes. She looked nervous, he could only imagine what she did this time. She was getting more confident in her magic now. A confidence that used up a lot of materials.

“Del, what did you do this time?” he asked.

“Felix I promise to conjure more of the really fancy fabric tonight if you just hide me. Just drop me in your pocket and pretend I wasn’t here. Please?”

“Delphia Kamia you get back here!” his mother shouted.

Almost on instinct he slipped his sister into his pocket. He would never let anyone hurt his family, even when it was the rest of his family. His mother came running out of their house with a glare that made him shudder. That caused a number of whines from the slide on his leg. He didn’t hear the ladder fall though.

“Felix, where is your sister?” his mother asked. She set her hands on her hips, her ebony hair was a mess. Felix just shrugged, preferring not to directly lie. “She managed to draw on all the extra catalysts again and even caused a small explosion this time. She’s lucky it was just us inside, you and your father could have been hurt.”

“I don’t think it would have hurt me,” Felix smiled. It was a wry smile, sometimes his mother acted like he wasn’t a giant.

“Don’t belittle magic. The explosions can do a lot of damage when you aren’t a witch. Now where is she?”

“I’m not sure, sorry to say.” His lie had a strong chance to fall flat when the human in question squirmed in his pocket.

“When you see her make sure she knows she’s grounded for the two months it will take me to travel to get more catalysts.” The shout told him and the squirming human in his pocket that their mother knew where she was.

“I can always take you, it should only take a few days then.”

“That’s right I do have a giant son who would never lie and hide his sister and will happily help me replace what she blew up so he doesn’t also get in trouble.” The glint in her red eyes had him looking away. “I’ll go get packing for the trip then, we’ll leave in a few days.”

Felix watched her walk back inside. Cedric slapped his palm to get his attention, laughing when he looked down. Delphia stopped squirming and the kids continued playing. This life he wound up with was hectic. He just smiled as time passed. Delphia slept in his pocket all day. The woman came for her son when the rest of the children in the village went home. Delphia asked to be let out around then too. She ran back inside, but Felix stayed outside waiting for his dad.

The white haired man walked home slowly. As soon as he was in reach Felix leaned forward, wrapping his fingers around the tall human. There was no resistance as he lifted his father from the ground and brought him close. He pressed the man to his chest as he stood. Walking towards the home magic had made to fit them all.

“Busy day?” his dad asked. The sarcasm made him chuckle.

“No, just left with the kids while everyone was busy. I don’t know why they keep doing that. I’m the big scary giant,” he said. A part of him never had forgotten the gossip from when his parents first took him in.

“If you could keep your threats maybe they’d stop coming. Everyone who comes to see me talks about how their kids love when you play the big scary giant who won’t help them play.”

“Maybe I’ll just start trapping them in my pocket then.”

“They’d probably love it, I think you’re stuck with them. Just like you're stuck with us.”

Felix didn’t say anything else. He pressed his dad a bit more firmly against his chest. He was stuck with his human sized family. A human, a witch, a half witch and a giant… and he wouldn’t change a thing.

#gt #giant/tiny #giant tiny #g/t #g/t writing #gt writing #gianttiny #gt community #g/t community #gtjuly #gt july 2023 #gt july intimidate #oc: felix #oc: dabria #oc: Vitus #parental gt #gt found family

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bumblingbabooshka · 11 months

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Too many posts about how Chakotay would accept and follow Janeway no matter what she did for a man who was five seconds from starting a mutiny* against her in Equinox. He was 100% correct for almost doing that too but to me that means he would not be down with Janeway just doing whatever and has a strong sense of morality which is similar to but obviously not the same as Janeway’s and isn’t overridden by his affection for her.

After Chakotay sees that Janeway’s willing to torture and potentially kill even one person for her sense of justice he strongly opposes her and seems ready to back up that objection with action if necessary. *There’s a vague indication at the end of the episode that to mutiny against her would be “crossing a line” and so he wouldn’t have done it but One) I personally feel that’s something easy to say after the crisis has been averted and there’s no longer any need for action. “I wouldn’t have done it” is easy when push is no longer coming to shove and you don’t want to think about whether or not you would have. “I wouldn’t have done it” - does Janeway say this to herself about the slaughter of the Equinox crew? Two) I still can’t imagine that Chakotay would have been happy, even if he hadn’t mutinied against her - he still would have strongly opposed her and did oppose her enough to be confined to his quarters. and Three) This to me just reads as a ‘return to status quo’ easy line put in there to assure the audience that their relationship is unchanged when in reality I think such a large event would have to change their relationship in some way. Some lines require crossing. If someone you follow is doing something you consider morally wrong do you prize your loyalty to them over your own moral code? I believe it’s a very strong character choice that Chakotay’s answer seems to be ‘no.’ Until the very end of the episode it seems that there’s a limit to a ‘difference of opinion’ and he wouldn’t just let Janeway do something he considers evil unopposed because she’s the captain or he likes her. To say at the very end ‘Oh, he wouldn’t have ever gone against Janeway after all’ seems (to me) both disingenuous and weak from character writing standpoint.

In contrast, Tuvok also sees that Janeway has become obsessed with the idea of enacting revenge on the Equinox’s crew as he’s present for the ‘negotiation’ with the aliens in which Janeway literally promises the aliens that they can murder every last member of the ship.

Tuvok’s answer is clear as we next see him on the bridge at his security post, actively helping Janeway with her plan despite knowing that, if successful, it’ll lead to the deaths of everyone on board. This is very interesting to me as he acknowledges that her behavior is irrational and as he doesn’t experience emotions and does temporarily oppose Janeway it isn’t as if he’s motivated by revenge or thinks this is a good plan/thing to do. However, I think his reasoning has something to do with the fact that he has so much trust in her. When she says “I know what I’m doing, Tuvok.” he believes her and is willing to follow along with her plan even if he personally might not like it. It’s a shame we don’t get more of Tuvok’s reasoning in this episode. He doesn’t have any more meaningful lines after this so we never really know why he doesn’t fight harder against Janeway but if I were to guess I’d guess it has something to do with what he says to Seven in Year of Hell.

His trust in Janeway is absolute and he implies that he’d follow her and consider it the right thing to do even if he knew that her logic was flawed. That, to me, is also very interesting for a Vulcan. Early on in the series Janeway tells Tuvok that he’s her moral compass, that she relies on him as both a friend and advisor - that she values him highly for his logic and depends on their relationship as Captain of the ship and as Janeway the person. She does this after bringing Tuvok a moral quandary which Tuvok attempts to ‘solve’ by making the difficult choice she can’t due to her ethical standards.

Tuvok in this case knows that Janeway’s ‘highest priority’ is getting the crew home and that Janeway can’t accomplish this goal because she doesn’t want to break the law. However, Tuvok solves this by breaking the law for her. He acknowledges that Janeway won’t like this and says he’s prepared to lose his job and go to prison for it once they return to Federation space but to him it’s the logical choice and even at the very end of their conversation he upholds his decision as logical (as does Janeway, tempering it by pointing out how ‘logical’ reasoning is as prone to variance and the justification of wrong actions as ‘emotional’ reasoning.)

I can’t help but wonder if this experience changed Tuvok since I can’t recall him ever really going against the Captain again and this sort of behavior/reasoning seems to be...not against his later stance of “The Captain is always right.” but more nuanced. He still thinks Janeway is ‘in the right’ and acts expressly so that Janeway can keep being ‘in the right’ while still fulfilling her goals. Equinox has a Maquis rebel, once considered a terrorist and now considered a dear friend, your first officer (banished from your sight) telling you that you’re doing the wrong thing, you’re hurting people out of a sense of vengeance, he doesn’t even recognize you anymore. “I won’t let you do this,” he shouts through the vents. “You can’t do this!” Meanwhile your security officer, moral compass and friend of twenty years and counting is standing at the ready, pointing his finger at the sacrificial wolf-turned-lamb (an optical illusion, it changes depending on where you stand) that wronged you. “Right there,” he’s saying though he objected to this once as well and kept silent thereafter. “There’s the heart.” I don’t know. I don’t have any grand conclusion to this, I just thought it was interesting! Chakotay-Janeway-Tuvok morality play, when?

#Tuvok #Chakotay #st voyager #'this isn't about rules and regulations - it's about right and wrong' being something both Janeway and Chakotay think in Equinox #but to vastly different outcomes #contrasted by Tuvok's 'the captain is always right'#I want them all to duke it out philosophy style #Kathryn Janeway #Tuvok is the captain always right or do you always CONSIDER her to be right? (two different things)

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thereisnolumos · 11 months

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I can't decide between 4, 6 or 7 which is the worse ron. Honestly can't. 6th year ron strings Hermione along knowing they like each other, but purposely goes for Lavender. Than gets annoyed with Lavender by the end, and instead of dumping her he says Hermione's name. All while getting annoyed with Hermione for going out with that Cormac guy. 4th year he gets jealous that Harry is in a life or death situation and abandons him, ruins Hermione's first dance and date. Used Hermione as a last resort for a date to the yule ball, and got annoyed with her when she already had a date and assumed no one asked her. Or 7th year, made promise to stick with Harry during Horcrux hunting but fucked off when it got too hard. Got jealous of Hermione and Harry, only liked Hermione as a sorta prize to be won to prove he was better than Harry, than came back like everything is ok with a bullshit apology.

Ron gets progressively worse the older he gets

He treats Hermione like shit from the beginning, when they become “friends” he always treats her as if her time and attention is owed to him, like she’s supposed to always be there. It starts small with “Hermione will always give me homework to copy” and progresses to “She’ll be available for the Ball when every other girl will reject me” and “She’ll wait for me to want her in a relationships” as he ages.

Also, Ron is the epitome of “weaponized incompetence” and it’s infuriating to me how many times he uses it to get Hermione to do smth for him/instead of him.

Ron is extremely jealous of EVERYONE around him. And this trait gets progressively worse with his age too. In book 1 he is envious of Harry’s new broom, but he’s still capable to be happy for him as well. By book 4 he looses all traces of empathy and compassion and is envious of smth Harry 1) clearly had nothing to do with and everyone with brain would be able to tell, 2) could literally result in his death and it was stated EXPLICITLY many times. But all he sees is “Harry is the center of attention again” and treats him like shit for it. Not once was Harry ever happy or seeking for any sort of fame or recognition, especially considering WHAT he’s famous for.

Also in Book 4 he’s angry and feeling betrayed by Hermione HAVING A GOOD TIME. He’s threatened by someone else being in her life at all, someone she clearly likes and interested in. Because how could it be, that she dares to spend time with anyone else! The traitor! Honestly, I would’ve punched him square in the face for the shit he poured on her at the Yule Ball.

I consider him “sticking with Harry” in book 5 to be 1) I just screwed up, I can’t again or this time it’ll be for good and I can’t manage on my own bcs I’m that useless, plus 2) it’s us against the world! Harry is finally on the other side of famous and it’s so cool. Maybe not entirely conscious on his part, but I do believe these were the reasons for him, similar as they were in Book 2

In book 6 he’s truly shown to grow into a misogynistic asshole. He slut shames his sister for kissing a boy (if I recall he started doing it in Book 5, bit in 6 he’s off the rails with it), he once again shames and guilts Hermione for being asked out by someone else, he uses Lavender to get back at her (Lavander deserved so much better from the narrative overall, but we already established that JKR hated women). And he treats Lavander like shit through all of it! Ronald Weasley is the asshole of a first boyfriend that you drag through mud with your girlfriends for years to come because he was THAT HORRIBLE

And then the ultimate abandonment in book 7… if the writer would be even slightly better, he wouldn’t have returned and these would be a good arc of “not all friendship survives the hardships, or even just time. Not all friends will be with you forever”. Which is an important message for young people, because everyone always believe that they’ll be best friends forever for the entire life but it so rarely works. And it’s normal, that it doesn’t. There doesn’t have to be a grand betrayal or falling out, sometimes your paths just lead you to very different places. Ron didn’t betray them in the sense that Peter betrayed the Marauders (which we still don’t have any real reason for by the way. She just wrote that it happened with NOTHING supporting it backing up that plot), he didn’t switch sides. He just left. Because while Harry and Hermione understood the reality and graveness of war and their situation, Ron still treated it as “an adventure”, he “played in war” if you will. Many like to claim that “it was all the horcrux that he was wearing! It made him feel this and say this!” - both Hermione and Harry wore it too. Even longer than Ron, who didn’t wear it while his wounds healed. The horcrux didn’t put these thoughts in his head, it played off of what was already there. Did it exhilarate and magnified it? Yes, of course. But it was all already in his mind before he ever put the locket on. All of these thoughts and tendencies could’ve been found throughout all other books. And that’s why I never bought into his return, it didn’t feel organic with the rest of the story. It made no sense. She put it there simply bcs she decided that “trio must remain” and that Hermione will end up with him, for some reason that is beyond my understanding

#harry potter #anti romione #anti ron weasley #anti ron #ron bashing #ron weasley bashing #anti jkr #I’m always amazed at how close this woman constantly was to a good story and good writing #and each and every time she backpedaled into the shot show that we got

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fenny-self-ships · 1 year

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Hi I'm back at it 😭

Help me out if you can friend, how would villains of your choice (any number, but please include Honest John!) react to finding someone to trick/swindle, but they're suddenly struck with cupid's arrow upon seeing them? 👀

Hello again! I’d be more than happy to provide ^-^

How villains would react to being smitten with their victims~~

Honest John~!

We all know he tends to pick the innocent, oblivious targets

He likely saw you and almost immediately went ‘Wow! A new sweetheart to exploit!’

But upon actually talking to you, no doubt hamming up the courteousness and charisma, he’d start to realise that perhaps you’re a little... too sweet.

The more he speaks, the more he listens to you, the more he begins to realise he couldn’t bring himself to hurt a fly on your head

“The world is gonna eat this poor thing alive... but it’s not gonna be by my hands.”

He’s swindled the poor, the rich, the elderly, and literal children, why was he so hesitant to scam you!?

The realisation would hit him like a train, and all at once, he won’t leave you alone!

“What am I doing? Well, I’m your... agent, yes! And an agent has to keep an eye on their talent!”

Like hell he’s gonna let some other ruffian lay their hands on you. You now have your own personal bodyguard.

Dr. Facilier~!

This suave bitch knows exactly how to spot somebody with time and money to spend

But as grey as his moral compass is, I just KNOW he’s a softie somewhere deep down

He tends to prey on naivety, but god, you’re far too darling to be hanging around somebody like him, and he knows it almost instantly

He’ll still take you down, give you a reading of some description, but he can’t bring himself to tell you anything bad

You’ll likely leave with a good fortune at a heavily discounted price, and a polite kiss on the back of the hand to top it all off

He’s flirtatious, sure, but isn’t gonna make a move on his own

The last thing he’d want is to involve you with his ‘friends’

In a way, avoiding you is his way of showing he cares <3

Ursula~!

This woman flirts with EVERYBODY

It’ll be almost impossible to tell if she actually likes you

But she’ll know

She is VERY smooth -- after having decided she’s into you, I guarantee she’d weave some sort of clause into your contract mandating you spend time with her

A date, perhaps??

The payment is your heart, or maybe a kiss

You’re her partner now

She will, of course, still swindle her way into a good deal, but you’re a lovely added bonus~

#I chose the ones most likely to try and deceive people #the tricksters if you will #it just so happens that I LOVE ALL OF EM #thanks for the ask Riv!!#^-^#self ship #disney villains #honest john #dr facilier #ursula #x reader #headcannons #fenris asks

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countryclubkook · 1 year

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Him Or Me Pt.2

Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Thornton!Reader

Warnings: language, death, drugs, alcohol, toxic Rafe, spoilers for obx 2, angst, slight sexual innuendo at the end

A/N: the long awaited part 2 is finally here, it took me forever to write and i’m still not happy with it so there’s a very good chance i’ll delete this and end up redoing it but in the meantime I hope it’ll suffice. Writers block is truly the worst thing in the world, I hope I did the first part justice in this and hope you all enjoy. The timeline in this is a bit different than the one on obx for story sake!

A few weeks had passed since everything with Topper went down and to say shit had escalated was putting it lightly. Everything was much more intense and you didn’t know if you were going to make it out alive by the end of this all.

John B had killed the sheriff according to everyone in town and had a massive search team looking to bring him in. This only backfired completely when he and Sarah drove their boat straight into the storm and presumably died trying to escape by going towards the storm. That’s what you believed until you overheard Ward and Rafe talking about what Rafe did and how he was the one to kill Sheriff Peterkim, you were sick to your stomach at the thought of the same hands that held you at night being responsible for taking away someone’s life and stumbled back into your room before throwing up into the trash can.

“Baby? Fuck are you okay?!” Rafe rushed to your side to hold your hair back and watched in confusion as you smacked his hand away. The look of pure fear in your eyes and face told him that you heard the conversation. You knew the truth and you were scared of him.

“You killed her Rafe, you framed John B! What the hell is wrong with you?” you screamed at him while backing into the corner wanting to be as far away from him as possible.

“Hey!” he watched you flinch and immediately regretted it “i'm sorry for yelling at you, but you gave me no choice. You didn’t ask me why I did it, you act like I'm some kind psycho killer when I'm not okay? I was protecting my dad just like I protected you when your brother was doing all that shit to hurt you” he watched you grimace at the memory before he continued, “I couldn’t let her hurt my dad and now he’s safe because of me. Sarah is gone and this is my chance to step up and make him proud. Don’t you want him to be proud of me and for us to be a happy family baby?” he cocked his head to the side and slowly walked to where you were before crouching so he was eye level with you.

“Well, of course I do Rafe but you still-“ his hand moved to squeeze the side of your face, not too rough, just enough to make you stop talking.

“I saved him, I saved us baby. If my dad died, we wouldn’t be together right now. You would be alone again, I did this for us” he sounded so sincere and you wanted to believe him so bad.

“Tell me what happened, why you felt the only choice you had was to kill her” he had you where he wanted.

“She was going to shoot him, said he killed John B’s dad with no proof other than a compass and something those fucking pogues said. He would have died over something that wasn’t even true” his eyes welled up and you couldn’t help but bring your hand to the side of his face watching him instantly melt into your touch.

“Do you believe me baby? Please tell me you do, I don’t want to lose you, I can’t lose you”

The next words spilled out of your mouth before you could even think about what you were just told, “I believe you. I’m so sorry I didn’t Rafe, I'm just scared. You’re the only person I have left”

“I know baby, i’m not going anywhere. I fucking love you” he said before pulling you into a kiss.

That conversation with Rafe happened almost a month ago now and your relationship had taken a turn for the worst. What once was a perfect relationship full of love and a man that would do anything to protect you had turned into a toxic relationship full of pain from a man that grew to be a stranger to you. The arguments became more frequent and he was becoming more and more unhinged as each day passed by, his father only adding on to it all. It was like walking on eggshells around him 24/7 and you hated it, you were alone even when Rafe was right there because talking to him only ended in screaming matches or him being too high and wanting a quick fuck to distract him from whatever the hell happened that day. Topper still wanted nothing to do with you, anytime he happened to see you at the country club he’d quickly turn away and leave. But you couldn’t blame him, he warned you and you chose Rafe over him, your own brother.

One night you decided you’d had enough, Rafe was off doing god knows what all the time and getting high more frequently and it was exhausting. You decided you were going to talk to him about it tonight and give him an ultimatum, you or the drugs and whatever the fuck he deemed more important. But the universe always seems to work against you and had other plans, the universe being Ward Cameron and his untimely death.

Now you couldn’t have known what happened, you hadn’t been at Tannyhill when it happened and it wasn’t all over the news yet so nobody had said anything. You knew they had been onto them and that Rafe had been arrested but apparently you were expected to have superpowers and know that Rafe was released from jail and Ward had blown himself up. That’s how you ended up here having yet another fight with Rafe.

“God you’re so ungrateful, you know? I mean Topper dropped you like a lost fucking puppy and I took you in, my family took you in, and you’re tired? I work my ass off to provide for this family, you included, and this is how you treat me? I just lost my father. I was just thrown in jail and my dad took the fall for me making me more of a fucking disappointment, sorry if this isn’t all about you for once” you rolled your eyes at the Topper comment, he always threw it back in your face that he is the one that took you in after what happened, that he was the one that was there for the aftermath. You knew you should have let it go, his large dilated pupils and the small remnants of white powder under his nose alerting you he was high out of his mind. But you just had enough and snapped back.

“If it wasn’t for you Rafe, Topper wouldn’t have even done that. Everything is all your fault! None of this shit with your dad would have even happened if you didn’t kill the fucking cop! God I should have listened to Top when he told me you’d just hurt me. I should have chosen him, at least then I would still have a family” you scoffed and went to walk away before his hand roughly grabbed your wrist.

“Watch how you fucking speak to me. I’m all you have left now, without me you have nobody. What did Topper call you again…. A lying whore? Maybe that’s really what you are, just remember sweetheart, you’re absolutely nothing without me” his voice low and a sinister smirk on his face when he saw tears run down your face.

“I hate you” you yanked your arm free before running into one of the spare bedrooms and locking the door, climbing into the bed before sobbing into your hands at the harsh reality.

You heard a soft knock and sat up in bed rubbing at your eyes. You must have fallen asleep at some point, the argument from a few hours prior hitting you like a ton of bricks again. Maybe if you ignored the person on the other side of the door they’d go away. A few minutes went by without another knock and you assumed your plan worked…until you heard the lock turning and the door opened to reveal the last person you wanted to see.

“Go away” you didn’t want to see him, you didn’t want to look at him, you didn’t want to be in the same room as him, nothing.

“Please,” his voice cracked before he continued “just let me talk” you hated yourself for how easily you gave in.

“talk” you mumbled out and motioned for him to sit.

“I’m so sorry baby. I’m just under so much pressure and now my dad is dead and I’m fucking lost. I never wanted to hurt you, I didn’t mean to fuck this up” he was on his knees in front of you breaking down into tears.

“Rafe…” you sighed knowing you’d forgive him and move on like you always did. It was a toxic cycle but the desperate hope that your Rafe would come back prevented you from leaving.

“I know, if you never want to speak to me again I understand. I hate myself for what I did and said, how I fucking treated you, I always fuck everything up. You were right when you said everything is my fault” what he was saying was partially true, but he also knew in his very fucked up mind that he had you in the palm of his hand. If he broke out the tears and the sob story then you’d believe him and stay. It wasn’t right and he knew that, but it never seemed to stop him from doing it anyway.

“You hurt me..A lot Rafe. This is getting exhausting and I don’t know if I can do it anymore, this isn’t healthy and you know it” you hadn’t even realized you were crying until you felt the wet drops fall on your thighs.

“I know, I just love you. I’m going to get better okay? I’ll get my shit together and get clean and take over the family business. I’ll be a better man, I’m going to make you proud baby, please just give me another chance. I love you more than anything” he moved closer to you, still on his knees, and placed his hands on both sides of your thighs.

“One more chance Rafe. I love you so much it hurts, you fuck it up or hurt me again and i’m done for good. This new you scares me and I just want my old Rafe back” you placed your hands on his face but knew you would come back if this happened again. He knew that too, but he would play the part and make you believe it would be different.

“I promise, I'll get better. I love you so much baby” he said with relief before moving to test the waters and kiss you.

You were reluctant to give in but couldn’t resist and kissed him back with passion. He made you feel important again that night, claimed every inch of you as his over and over again, but it would happen again. He’d send you love bombs after the war and you’d both pretend it never happened. This was your new life as sad as it was, you chose this. That’s all you repeated to yourself each time it happened.

But fuck were you in over your head. You wanted Topper back in your life, you wanted your room at your house, you wanted things how they were, you didn’t sign up for this shit but it was too late now. You just didn’t know what else the universe had in store for you and just how much your life was truly about to change.

#rafe cameron #rafe cameron imagine #obx imagine #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron x y/n #outer banks netflix #obx angst #outer banks #rafe outer banks #rafe cameron x thornton!reader

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mediocreanomaly · 10 months

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Legato falling for you HCs

Authors Note: I’m so sorry I’m a Legato apologist so of course my first post has to be about him lmao I am for sure not proof reading this so apologies for any mistakes

• First off, he’s got alot going on. So it’s most definitely going to be a bit of a slow burn for him to really like you, much less love you. Don’t be deterred though! Patients is key... •When he first meets you he’s pretty indifferent to you. I’d imagine you’d have to meet him through the Gung-Ho-Guns so he mostly just wants you to stay out of his way. •Main way to get him to warm up to you? Food. They say food is the quickest way to a mans heart and that's especially true for Legato. Don’t make a big deal of it but if you just happen to have extra snacks laying around for him? Who is he to say no? •Eventually, he might even start to unconsciously seek you out knowing where you are there's a snack to follow. •Slowly, the two of you even begin talking, small words exchanged between meetings, you sit and nod while he quickly complains about what ever is currently not going right with the other Gung-Ho-Guns •Now eventually these quick talks turn into full conversations. Legato isn’t exactly nice but he’s also not completely rude either as you talk. He silently listens and might add a snarky comment along the way but he secretly has begun enjoying listening to you, not to mention he can’t stop watching your mannerisms and notices you need a hair cut soon and- uh oh. •If you’ve managed to stick it out this far congrats! You’ve actually begun to get somewhere with the man. Now once Legato begins realizing he has feelings for you it’s a lot to unpack. He’s been through a lot and trusting someone is hard for him so give him some time and space as he mulls over how to handle the situation • Once the two of you start dating not much changes admittedly. For one he does not want you to initiate any touch. He has a ton of trauma regarding it and one wrong move will have him pushing you back with his powers before you can say “Bluesummers”. • The second thing you have to understand is Knives Millions comes first. Every. Time. It might take some getting used to but the man is devoted. If you can stick with him through those two things it’ll actually bring you a lot closer to him. Not many people would be understanding of that. •Legato does try to show he cares in his own ways though. Bringing you things back from towns he visits (destroys), giving you books he likes, ect. It’s small but it’s the best he can do to thank you for still being by his side. **Very slight spoilers for manga** •Now. I do actually believe you could get this man away from Knives but it is a very long, very tedious process. Don’t ever shit talk Knives around him, don’t beg for him to leave knives for you, and don’t tell him knives is bad for him. He’ll leave just like that, instead go for a softer approach •Legato doesn’t know how to live without someone commanding him. He’s never known kindness or love until he met you, so it’s up to you to slowly show him he can live without a collar around his neck. •It’ll be hard I won’t lie, but do domestic things with him in the rare time he has away from Knives. Show him how to cook, take walks with him, fold laundry with him, show him that life doesn’t always have to be a fight. Sometimes you can just...be. • If he opens up about his past? You’ve got him. He doesn’t share that information with anyone, and you are suddenly very aware of why he acts the way he does. Don’t pity him, but show compassion. Listen to everything he has to say and assure him he’s come along way since then. • At this point despite how devoted he is to Knives...I think you’d be able to finally drag him away. I think the main reason he’s so loyal to Knives is that he doesn’t know how else to live. Knives is honestly just another form of his abusers, another iron fist, another collar, another cage. But you? You’re like a small ray of hope, the first good thing to ever bless his existence. He won’t say it out loud, but he isn’t sure he deserves you, but he’s thankful he has you anyways. •For the sake of fluff we are going to assume you managed to get him out of the Gung-Ho-Guns, maybe you got him to reluctantly join Vash’s cause (unlikely) or maybe the two of you are now in hiding in a small town (more likely) either way it’ll be a bit easier to get Legato out of his shell, although don’t expect a huge transformation he’s still working himself out (but he’s trying!!!) •Eventually he get’s used to a life without someone looming over him, it’s weird for him at first, but not completely bad. He also starts to get more use to touch, your hand in his, his hand pressed against the small of your back, your fingers tracing his face. There will always be a limit to how much he can take before he needs a break, his trauma isn’t going to disappear over night but he’s trying everyday to be someone worthy of you love. Besides, when he gets to wake up suns still just peeking over the horizon your sleeping face catching a bit of the golden rays that sneak in through the blinds...he can’t help but think that all his suffering was worth it, as long as he get’s to keep waking up next to you.

#legato x reader #legato bluesummers #trigun x reader #sfw #legato x you #trigun x you

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halucygeno · 1 year

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[Draft] Why Roadside Picnic is a timeless masterpiece and why everyone missed the point

(DRAFT NOTE: Otherside Picnic and PAFL are tagged because I intended to conclude this essay by explaining why I think those works, ostensibly inspired by R.P., don’t understand and fail to capture what makes the novel so powerful. My writing never got to that point, but it might still be of interest to fans of Otherside Picnic and PAFL, so I’ve kept the tags. If I ever manage to somehow finish this, I’ll take it down and replace it with the full version.)

ESSAY START:

With that needlessly provocative title out of the way, I hope people are still here and willing to listen as I try to explain myself:

[SPOILERS FOR THE WHOLE BOOK, GO READ IT IF YOU HAVEN’T DONE SO YET]

At its very core, Roadside Picnic is a character study. It acts as philosophical and social commentary too, but a vast majority of that is delivered and explored through Redrick’s character arc.

The sci-fi stuff which everyone loves referencing, and which every adaptation and “inspired” work can’t help but include: the Zone, the artefacts, bolt tossing, Mosquito Manges - none of that matters. You could replace it with magic, or dragons, or some other arbitrary plot device - it just needs to be beyond human understanding and have no clear explanation or origin, to allow for the ideas discussed by Noonan and Dr. Pillman in Chapter 3. This basic premise is all you need to discuss xenology, human psychology, “what’s a rational being”, how insignificant we are in the universe, etc.

All the other details are either little tid-bits of worldbuilding, window-dressing, or serve a specific narrative purpose. Witches’ Jelly could be any “super dangerous substance”, because what matters is not that it eats your bones, what matters is that Redrick sells it to a shady dealer, betraying the morals he espoused in Chapter 1:

All of these objects aren’t just “cool artefacts”, they’re tools for the Strugatskys to get across their themes.

And those themes are... Well, that’s harder to summarise. The main theme of the story seems to be about how economic circumstances and crises in one’s personal life can rot a person’s moral compass and kill their faith in the possibility of a better world. The events of the story turn someone like Redrick - an honest worker who believes in Kirill’s promises that science has the potential to save humanity - into an evil hypocrite, a murderer who lies to himself to justify his reprehensible actions. The question asked of the audience is “how responsible is Redrick for his own fate”, while the ending asks “will any of it amount to anything”?

To be clear, Redrick is a BAD person. By the end of the book, he has quit his job at the Institute, sold Witches’ Jelly to shady 3rd parties (which ended in a laboratory accident that killed 35), cheated on his wife (with a woman he supposedly despises) and murdered an innocent kid. He even draws sadistic pleasure from the emotional pain he will inflict on Burbridge by killing his son, savouring the irony of Burbridge being the one who kept encouraging him to take some newbie to the Meat Grinder:

But he wasn’t always like this. At the start of the story, he is cynical and rough, but he has principles. Like already mentioned earlier, in the excerpt where Noonan tells him about someone looking to buy Witches’ Jelly, he even goes as far as saying that he’ll work with the police to turn them in. The same police which, earlier in the chapter, stopped him in the street because they profiled him and assumed he was up to something:

Redrick has done his time in prison, gotten an honest job (yes, I know that he says that he still makes "a few bucks on the side”, but he’s actually relieved when he hears they’ll be walling off the Zone because it’ll mean “less temptation”. He wants to make money as a decent citizen), and he’s still being treated like a criminal and stopped by the police on-sight. And despite this, his fear of what the wrong person might do with Witches’ Jelly is so strong, he’s willing to go to them and report the buyer.

And this rejection of his prior Stalker persona is deeper than just getting a job at the institute and being willing to cooperate with police. When Kirill assumes that Redrick suggested getting the Full Empty as a ploy to sell his services, at first, Redrick doesn’t understand what he means. When he does, he feels outright insulted:

When he finds out about Kirill’s death, he is devastated, but notably, this sorrow quickly turns into a hatred of the systems which throw young men to their deaths for money. He curses Ernest for profiting from this exploitation. A key scene is when he hands Creon (a young man who just arrived in Harmont and wants to become a Stalker) a wad of cash and urges him to go back to Malta:

Another pillar of Redrick’s character is the fact that he loves and is loyal to his fiancée, Guta, despite her family being openly antagonistic towards him - not just because of his criminal past, but the fact that he’s been afflicted by the Zone:

He marries her at some point after this.

Most importantly, he actually has a purpose. This is shown when he is pestered by the emigration agent, as he makes a speech about how Harmont is a “hole into the future”, which will change life around the world for the better:

The crucial detail here is that the one who inspired him to think this way is Kirill. Redrick is always portrayed as cynical and bitter, so this high-mindedness is not coming from somewhere within him - it’s external. He’s drawing inspiration from the idealistic, honest people around him. So when Kirill dies, it is not merely the death of a close friend. It is the death of Redrick’s faith, his hope in the future. He even says “How will I get on without you?”:

Basically, Chapter 1 sets-up Redrick AT HIS BEST, so that the story can send him on a downward spiral in every chapter that follows.

Chapter 2 has several important developments, and it marks the start of Redrick’s moral decline. Before getting into that, though, I’d like to draw attention to another part of Redrick’s moral compass which is highlighted - his hatred of Burbridge and, more importantly, his hatred of Burbridge’s daughter, Dina.

Buzzard Burbridge embodies the most reprehensible, slimy aspects of being a Stalker. He is a selfish profiteer, willing to sacrifice his comrades and leave them to die just so he can get away with the loot. Redrick hates Burbridge, and, very importantly, believes himself to be better than Burbridge:

Redrick hates that Burbridge has no regard for human life, and this hatred applies in equal measure to Dina. When Dina tells Redrick that he should have left Buzzard to his death, he slaps her in the face:

This is not done out of sympathy for the man - Redrick hates Burbridge. What insults him is the implication that he should’ve left a comrade to their death - even a piece of sh*t comrade. He hates Dina, because even though what she says about Buzzard is true, it’s not a reason to abandon him to his death. Just like her father, she has no regard for human life.

In this scene, it’s also worth noting that Redrick is very respectful to Hamster. Hamster is the only Stalker to survive entering the Meat Grinder, supposedly saved by Buzzard. He seems to hang around the Burbridge household, possibly acting as some kind of servant, but is deformed and crippled from his injury:

The contrast between how he speaks to Dina and Hamster sends a clear message; Dina’s beauty means nothing. She’s evil, and deserves less respect than ugly, deformed Hamster.

Another key moment is Redrick’s conversation with Noonan in the café near the Métropole hotel. There, we learn why he quit working for the institute; money. He could no longer earn bonuses when expeditions to the Zone began being handled by robots:

Important here is that his salary still isn’t terrible, and the institute did not fire him. He chose to quit, because he wants a sense of freedom, of not being bossed around, and the money to splurge on things (like cigarettes) and have peace of mind. This is aptly summarised in the line “a man needs money so that he doesn't have to always be counting it”.

Obviously, another reason why he quit is Kirill’s death. In his final, rambling monologue, Redrick admits that he hated working for the Institute, so it’s very likely that Kirill and his idealistic visions for the future were the only things keeping him there.

So, to summarise, at this stage, Redrick’s character looks more or less like this: 1) Wants to do honest work and disassociate from his criminal past. 2) Believes the world can be saved by technology from the Zone. 3) Will never sell Witches’ Jelly to dangerous 3rd parties. 4) Needs money for a basic standard of comfort and freedom from authority. 5) Won’t abandon someone to their death, even someone as bad as Buzzard. 6) Beauty doesn’t matter if, morally, you’re an awful person. 7) Loyal to his wife and daughter.

Having lost Kirill, and with him, his hope for a better future, Redrick’s new source of meaning is his wife and daughter. His purpose in life is providing for them, especially Monkey, whose condition makes her the target of bullying.

(Side note: One thing always annoyed me. Why did they call her Monkey?! That’s asking for people to bully your kid! Was it just a coincidence, or did they really name her after her birth defect? And this is an accurate translation of the Russian “Мартышка”, no weird translation problems here.)

But this new purpose - providing for his family - crashes into him hard when he’s set-up, betrayed, caught by the police, and is forced to flee. It’s then revealed that Redrick had a trump-card up his sleeve - a jar of Witches’ Jelly and an interested buyer, willing to pay the money to his wife in instalments while he rots in prison. It’s never stated how long his prison sentence is, but Redrick estimates that evading arrest (which he did to arrange the transaction) will add another year to it.

To be clear, this jar was prepared as a last resort. He clearly doesn’t want to do this. Earlier, in the Métropole, when he's asked if he managed to procure it, he lies, saying that he didn’t:

He promises to get it later, keeping Throaty interested, but not giving it to him. Later, as he’s about to make the call, he admonishes himself:

This the first major step in Redrick’s decline, where his self-interest explicitly endangers the lives of others, and he still picks himself over others.

Before moving into Chapter 3, one part which I’d like to quickly touch on is the circumstances of Redrick’s arrest. I didn’t pick up on this on my first read, but Ernest wasn’t the one who set-up the police ambush in the Borscht. The one who set up Redrick’s arrest was Richard Noonan:

At first, I was confused as to why Redrick never realised that Noonan betrayed him, but after looking at it more closely, and despite how stupid it may sound, I genuinely think Redrick was so sleep-deprived that he forgot Noonan was the one who told him to drive to the Borscht in the first place. After getting into the cab, he falls asleep and wakes up, incorrectly thinking he told the driver to take him to the bank:

Regardless, in Chapter 3, we learn that Richard Noonan is some sort of government agent, working for the Institute or with law enforcement in some capacity. His mission is to shut down the “flow of materials from the Zone through Harmont”, which is why he has been befriending Stalkers and infiltrating their social circles, monitoring them. His activities include buying artefacts from Stalkers and rerouting them to the Institute:

If you’ve been paying attention, the Stalker which Noonan mentions in the above excerpt, the one he is stringing along and exploiting for his swag, is Creon, the Maltese Stalker which Redrick tried to pay to give up on the profession and go back home in Chapter 1. He persevered, became a successful, and what did it get him? He’s not an adventurer - he’s a pawn, drowning his sorrows in booze, getting closer to death, unaware that he’s being exploited by Noonan.

The worst part of this, which is never said explicitly, but heavily implied, is that the Institute is allowing certain Stalkers to operate because real humans are better, more effective gatherers of artefacts then their officially sanctioned robots. They are supposedly cracking down on this illegal activity, but they don’t mind taking advantage of it while they can:

There’s a sickening duality to it. Officially, Stalkers are criminalised, thrown in jail, ostracised. But behind the scenes, the Institute relies on them to deliver them materials, strings them along and keeps them on their payroll.

(Side note: I’ll let you draw whatever real-life parallels you find applicable. The ones that immediately come to my mind are the US prison-industrial complex and the funding of the the Taliban, but I’m sure you can find many, many more.)

Later, we generally get to see Richard Noonan being a horrid person - beating up a subordinate for having overlooked a group of Stalkers who were sneaking into the Zone without the Institute’s awareness.

Following this, Noonan has his conversation with Valentine Pillman, where the analogy of a “roadside picnic” is used and where the book derives its title. The general message is that we’re completely insignificant. The visitation wasn’t an instance of aliens coming to contact us or conquer us - they were just passing by and accidentally dropped a bunch of their trash on us.

Of course, Pillman qualifies this by saying that this is just his personal theory, and that there is no evidence to support this, or any other interpretation. He points out that to speculate about the motives of non-human beings by applying human psychology to them is folly, and calls xenology a pseudoscience.

For how central this conversation seems to be to the book (it’s in the title, after all), I don’t actually think that it’s a particularly interesting concept. It speaks to a general existential dread many people can probably relate to, being insignificant in the face of the infinitely complex, incomprehensible mechanisms of the cosmos. But it seems quite simple and self-contained, especially compared to the layered, interconnected themes of the rest of the book. It’s quaint.

Much more interesting to me are the things we find out about the artefacts recovered from the Zone. Eternal Batteries, seemingly capable of producing infinite energy, are used to power people’s private cars. Black Sprays, little beads which one theory claims are huge swathes of compressed space, are used to decorate jewelry:

To be blunt, Kirill was wrong. The artefacts from the Zone and the research done by the Institute are not “saving the world”. They’re accomplishing almost nothing. At best, they become the playthings of the wealthy and powerful, while the working class is literally killing themselves in the Zone to acquire them. At worst, they’re causing horrible accidents and killing people, like the Currigan labs incident:

The point of this is to show that fancy new technology does not inherently uproot old systems of injustice and exploitation. Without societal change, even something as reality-shattering as an alien invasion will be slotted into the old way of things. There’s even a passing mention of more luxury accommodations being built in Harmont in response to... tourists:

I saw another Tumblr post tagged with #roadside picnic, complaining about how people are trying too hard to make every soviet novel into something political. Well, I’m sorry. IT IS POLITICAL. You’re just not paying attention. If you disagree, I challenge you to read the above passage about “the suburbs being emptied” and tell me that it’s not trying to communicate anything about the economical systems ruling Harmont.

And if I need to spell it out, the force consuming and destroying the lives of Stalkers is not “the Zone”. It’s capitalism. The characters constantly talk about greenbacks, about needing money. The reason Stalkers need to break the law and risk their lives is either because they have rent to pay, or because they want to become financially stable enough to be free from the coercion of bosses and landlords.

The entire reason Redrick betrays his moral convictions in Chapter 2 is because of money. He leaves the Institute because his job is being automated, his pay is being cut, and he doesn’t want to live paycheck to paycheck. He wants to be free. And finally, he sells the Witches’ Jelly because he has to keep his family fed while he’s stuck in jail.

And if you still think I’m just reading too much into things, seeing what I want to see, I’d like to take you back to Chapter 2 for a few notable passages. Namely, Redrick’s experiences as he is entering the luxury hotel, Métropole:

This is Redrick, talking to a cop. Yes, the police, so eager to harass him in Chapter 1, are suddenly asking him if he’s alright, offering to help, calling him “mister”. So what changed?

Well, he is wearing a suit, holding a suitcase, standing in front of a fancy hotel. They assumed he’s rich. That he’s a respectable citizen, that he’d never need to steal anything.

There’s a genius reversal here - in Chapter 1, Redrick was an honest lab worker, but was profiled and stopped by the police. In Chapter 2, while the cop is trying to help him, he’s on his way to an illegal deal with a suitcase full of contraband. He’s an actual criminal, but he’s treated with kindness, because he looks upper-class.

And if you still somehow think this is all a coincidence, I ask you - why is this scene here? Why was it written? Seriously, it’s such a random moment, a complete non-sequiteur from everything happening beforehand, and I never hear anyone talk about it. Redrick, out of nowhere, begins having strong hallucinations and has to stop to catch his breath. If the key information being conveyed here is “Redrick suffers from hallucinations”, why not just have him catch his breath and move on? Why add this random cop, trying so hard to be helpful?

The answer is simple. It’s not a “random cop”. It’s social commentary on how cops exist to protect and serve the ruling class.

In the hotel itself, we have this moment where Redrick steps into an elevator full of absurdly, comically obnoxious rich people:

If you’ve been ignoring the attached excerpts so far, I urge you to read this one. I cannot adequately summarise how seeping with contempt and revulsion these descriptions are. Redrick closes his eyes to try to “shut out” these people, to not have to look at them. The young boy is eating chocolate, of course, drooling, while his mother has the Black Sprays we talked about earlier on her necklace. This is the privileged, wealthy elite and Redrick HATES them and what they represent. It’s textbook class antagonism.

And this doesn’t just affect Redrick. Returning to Chapter 3, Noonan visits Redrick’s house and speaks to Guta, who tells him about their struggles with Monkey, whose condition had worsened, destroying most of her cognitive abilities:

Noonan is wealthy. He’s one of the people who uses a car powered by an Eternal Battery. He lives in hotels. But more importantly:

Noonan genuinely sympathises with Redrick and Guta’s plight, and the suffering they’re going through because of Monkey’s condition. He genuinely wants to help them, and is ready to, but then remembers his boss. He remembers that his job is not to help the ones who are struggling and need it the most, but to serve the system. To label these people criminals and “infiltrate” them, monitor them, instead of simply befriending them.

Of course, Richard Noonan is an awful person. But we're almost given the sense that, given his position, he doesn’t even have an opportunity to be a good, honest person. When he genuinely feels sympathy for those he exploits, he forces himself to stop and suppresses his good nature. Because that’s what’s expected of him, what his job requires. He’s there to protect the interests of the Institute - the ruling class.

I really hope these examples adequately demonstrate what I believe to be the main political themes of the story, because I’m going to put those aside for a moment and go back to the personal, moral journey of the main character.

The only thing of note left in Chapter 3 is Redrick’s father and his reaction to news of the lab accident.

[UNIFNISHED DRAFT ENDS HERE]

(TRANSLATION NOTE: All quotations are taken from the Antonina W. Bouis translation, despite there being an arguably more accurate translation by Olena Bormashenko. This is out of habit, not preference - I’m more familiar with the Bouis translation, which made searching for quotes easier.)

(Huge thanks to Antonina W. Bouis and later Olena Bormashenko for bringing this book to an anglophone audience, to Irena Lewandowska and Rafał Dębski for translating it to Polish, and to Siergiej Rajkov and Milan Asadurov for doing the same in Bulgarian.)

#roadside picnic #stalker #otherside picnic #parties are for losers #book analysis #strugatsky brothers #My writing

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spandexbutterfly4lyfe · 3 months

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please mysterious internet person, HOW?? DO YOU PROGRESS FROM ACQUAINTANCES TO FRIENDS??? i’m perpetually stuck in acquaintance purgatory and it’s hell and i would really appreciate a little of advice ; w ;

Okay I’m going to try to explain this as best I can with this migraine lol, bear in mind that I’m disabled and no longer get out much but this has worked with various demographics from normie boomers in dive bars to people younger than me on university campus.

Don’t start off too strong. Get a gauge of someone’s communication style before you really dive in.

If they seem shy, engage them by purposefully including them in the conversation. But make sure it’s a give and take, if you just ask them a bunch of questions with no natural pauses, it’ll come off as intense and offputting.

If you get a sense of neurodivergence from them, they may bond by trauma dumping. You could make a lighthearted joke that sort of implies the things you usually assume people don’t want to hear and gauge their reaction to that. Like, some people will make a little joke about their parents sucking, or about their focus deficit with ADHD, and in the right situations the other person just totally opens up. It’s good to know what kind of conversations you can feel comfortable having with someone, but if they don’t respond well, back off and switch gears.

If they seen like the kind of person who’s sort of disinterested in making friends, or seems generally insincere or like someone you can’t relate to, you don’t have to put pressure on yourself to be friends just to have friends. “Beggars can’t be choosers” isn’t a real thing, if your personality doesn’t match up with someone else’s, don’t force it.

Relate the things they tell you to your own life if they’re positive or interesting, but relate them in a way that conveys your interest in what they just said. Like you’re amazed or happy for them! Uplift their accomplishments, even if they act like it’s not worth it, and use specific details to express why you think it’s great.

(Example: if someone made some accomplishment with their art, “I can’t even draw a stick figure” is a generic cop out, while “That’s so awesome! I’ve tried [xyz art form] before and there’s so much more to it than people think. You must’ve put in a LOT of work for this.” is more specific and conveys that you understand just why this is great.)

If they tell you something negative or upsetting, convey that you understand how awful that is to a degree. Do not say you know exactly what it’s like or just give a separate example of something horrible happening to you. Use specific examples of a piece of why what they said is awful, and convey it in a way that, once again, implies amazement at what this person is going through. Maybe even outrage on their behalf if they’ve been wronged or are angry at what happened.

(Example: if someone had to put their pet down, don’t go on a tangent about how a vet’s negligence once killed your dog. It’s more comforting and intimate to hear “I have a little dog who’s my world and I just can’t imagine. I know it’s gotta happen someday but I can’t even bring myself to think about it, yknow? I just try to give her the best life she can have while she’s here. I guess that’s the best any of us can do.” Most of the time people will end up showing you pics after this.)

Always be excited to see the person. Charm is a delicate balance of mimicry and sincerity, of intimacy and space. You can be happy to see them without commandeering their time, you can agree with parts of nearly anything they say without talking out of your ass.

Ultimately, people like to feel seen. If you work on your compassion to find some part of what they’re telling you that you can understand and sympathize with, then reaffirm that they have good reason to feel that way, they will feel supported, and you will actually like them more.

You will need to be brave and confident about your support. If you aren’t brave you’ll just sound insincere and people don’t connect with people who won’t try to connect with them. Or people who won’t even confidently say who they are. And I don’t blame them, if someone won’t even trust me enough to tell me anything about themselves, who am I even making friends with? And while I tend to be more understanding of the anxiety that leads people to be insecure and insincere, most people aren’t. In that case, you may literally be the only thing stopping yourself from making friends. People can’t like you if they don’t even get a chance.

So all in all, the main things you need to make friends are compassion, a willingness to see and understand others’, the skill of making other people feel important, and the bravery to actually show you have a defined personality. That’s really the bulk of it!

Sorry to have typed a whole essay on this lol but if anyone else has anything to add about this topic please do! This myth that being friends and socializing is so so so so hard and confusing has GOT to go. We are learning and growing here babes.

#long post

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schrijverr · 6 months

Text

The Long Game

Ed has to attend a military gala and Roy is dreading it. However, he is surprised to discover that Ed is more aware of putting on a show and playing a good little soldier.

On AO3.

Ships: none

Warnings: none

~~~~

Roy hates military galas with a passion, though no one but close friends would know that about him and he likes to keep it that way.

It’s a whole evening of schmoozing, which, granted, he is very good at, but it’s tiring. The persona he has crafted for himself to get others to underestimate them is chatty and Roy discovered too late that he is more introverted than that, so playing it can become exhaustive.

However, that’s not why he’s apprehensive about this particular gala. No, that would be because Fullmetal will be in attendance.

It would be the first time since his inauguration into the military that he was to attend. He had joined up just after the gala had been thrown and by the time his first gala would roll around, he had messed up his automail. While all higher ups had wanted to meet the famous young prodigy, none were about to force a child amputee to show up for their own sakes, when he needed medical attention.

This year, no such stroke of luck had occurred and the Major was expected right alongside Roy to both their ire.

Roy is sure Fullmetal isn’t pleased, but Roy doubts he is more displeased than Roy. Though, displeased might be the wrong word. It’s more like cautious or afraid. Not of Fullmetal or for him, but for Roy himself.

You see, Roy has been working with the little twerp for over two years now and while the kid’s work reflects back great on Roy, his subordination leaves much to be desired. So having him in the room with all Roy’s higher ups will kill any reputation he brought.

It can only be a disaster.

Still, Fullmetal not showing up again might be even worse for Roy’s reputation, so there is no avoiding it, only damage control.

During the days leading up to the gala, Roy spends as much time as he can telling Edward all about military protocol and respect, hoping it’ll stick. He presses home how important good impression are. How they can influence how much people are willing to put a word in for him, help him along, provide funds. Anything to make Fullmetal care.

He has Hawkeye accompany Ed to a tailor, hoping that her presence will at least make him own a proper military uniform. Maybe even convince him to wear it, though his hopes aren’t too high for that.

In the end, Roy has to contend himself with the fact that he tried as hard as he could to make Fullmetal behave and prepare to deal with the fall out once it happens.

The gala is today and there is really no turning back. Roy is waiting for Ed alongside Vanessa, his sister, who will be playing his date tonight, spending the first half of the evening hanging of Roy’s arm and the latter half socializing and gathering intelligence for Madame Christmas.

Roy has complained to her and his foster mom about Fullmetal at length, telling them how much the brat could mess up for him. They understand his concerns, but both have spend most of their time laughing at his misery.

However, tonight Vanessa is involved herself and has a little more compassion for him. She assures him: “He’ll be on time, Roy. It’s not late yet, he still has time.”

“On time is late,” Roy frowns, checking his pocket watch, before scanning the streets for the familiar red coat, hoping Ed will get here soon.

“Isn’t that him over there?” Vanessa breaks him out of his thoughts, pointing at someone down the streets.

“Where?” Roy asks, when he doesn’t immediate spot Fullmetal.

“There. Little with blond hair right? In the uniform,” Vanessa answers, giving more detail so Roy can find him.

At the mention of a uniform, Roy starts to doubt she has the right person, but once his eyes land on who she’s pointing at, he can’t deny that it is indeed Fullmetal. Fullmetal in a uniform. Who would’ve thought he’d see the day?

“I hardly recognized you, you look like a professional,” Roy teases the second Ed is within hearing range.

“Oh shut up, Colonel Bastard,” Fullmetal scowls, rolling his eyes. “I don’t know how, but you manage to look slimier than usual.”

As Roy expected, the uniform is an illusion no one will be falling for, Fullmetal is still his bratty, angry little self. Mentally he sighs and prepares himself for the long time. Externally, however, he smirks: “It’s a talent. Now let’s go.”

“Are you going to introduce us?” Vanessa asks innocently, purposefully getting on Roy’s nerves in the way only an older sister can.

“Yeah, bastard, I thought you were supposed to be good at this. Show some basic human curtsy,” naturally Fullmetal backed Vanessa. Roy’s life is going to be over if those two team up.

“You could have introduced yourself,” Roy points out in vain, before saying: “This is Vanessa, she’s accompanying me to the gala tonight. Vanessa, this is Major Edward Elric, the Fullmetal Alchemist.”

“It’s a delight to meet you, young man,” she thrills, extending her hand, seamlessly picking up on Ed’s continuous need to be seen as an adult and playing into it.

“Pleased to make your acquaintance,” Ed replies, taking her hand. “Just know that it’s totally okay if you never want to see this guy again after tonight,” he adds, pointing a thumb to Roy.

Roy knows that Fullmetal has a lifelong accomplice and supporter in Vanessa the second she lets out a genuine laugh at the comment, head thrown back and everything. She grins: “Thank you, Edward. I’ll keep it in mind.”

“Let’s go before we’re late,” Roy interrupts, before they can conspire against him some more.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Ed scowls again, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he reluctantly starts to walk in the direction of the venue.

Meanwhile, Roy offers Vanessa his arm, both of them taking a moment to ensure their masks are on properly, before following after the boy.

The venue is brightly lit and filled with people. Roy hopes to park Fullmetal at the food table, before doing the rounds, as well as keep him there for the rest of the night, maybe send Armstrong his way as a distraction to get Fullmetal to stay there.

However, that plan is thwarted when they arrive. A Brigadier General makes his way to them when he spots them, obviously having been looking out for at least one member of their party and Roy suspects who. Jovially, the Brigadier General greets: “Ah, Colonel Mustang and the Fullmetal Alchemist!”

To Roy’s surprise, it is Ed, who salutes first with Roy quickly following. He has only even seen the boy give mocking salutes or very reluctant ones, but this one comes across as natural, like Fullmetal does this often.

“No need for those formalities,” the Brigadier General waves their salutes away, before making his goal clear, though Roy had already suspected it. “Ah, another beautiful lady on your arm, Colonel? I’m sure she’s lovely company, so you’ll be okay if I borrow your subordinate for a moment.” He turns to Fullmetal. “There are quite a few people, who’d love to pick your brain, kid.”

Roy is about to step in before Fullmetal can loudly proclaim his maturity, but he is surprised again when Ed respectfully replies: “I’d be honored, sir.”

“Of course, no problem,” Roy dismisses Fullmetal, unsure if he’s making a mistake. It seems like Fullmetal is content to play his role of military dog, but Roy is very well aware of the short fuse the kid has.

However, insisting to go along might anger the Brigadier General, who obviously wants the glory of introducing the great Fullmetal Alchemist for himself. So, Roy has to be okay with keeping an eye on Fullmetal from the corner of his eye as he proceeds to do his own business.

In moments like this, he wishes Hawkeye wasn’t such a well known face by his side, so she could be here with him tonight to keep her keen eyes on Ed. Alas, he much prefers her eyes by him in the day by day to validate that, so he’ll have to trust his own spacial awareness and that of Vanessa to notice once it all goes to shit, as things often do in Fullmetal’s presence.

But as the gala continues on, Roy is surprised to be proven wrong. Very wrong.

Fullmetal pops up everywhere and in the most unexpected ways. He never sticks out for his usual reasons (insults, insubordination, loudness, etc), instead he’s anything but.

When Roy is talking to a Major General, who is inching towards a promotion that Roy wants to lift along with, when he spots Ed up ahead. The kid is being introduced to a proper General and he politely salutes the man.

A little while later, he is walking across the room to introduce Vanessa to a fellow Colonel that Madame Christmas needs some dirt on. As they do, they pass by a gaggle of state alchemists and Fullmetal is among them.

Roy recognizes one of he speakers as a Lieutenant Colonel, who is a bit too big for his britches. But still ranking above Fullmetal, which he seems to be aware of, because he is merely politely nodding along to the guy giving a soliloquy about his own alchemy.

Now, the guy isn’t a bad alchemist. In fact, Roy knows him to be reliable to have your back, even if he’ll be obnoxious the whole way through. However, Roy knows that Ed had his particular branch of alchemy mastered before he hit double digits, so his agreeable silence as he listens to the lecture is surprising.

Of course, Fullmetal loves alchemy more than anything, so this must have been one of the better conversations he’s had this evening. But Roy can’t help but be surprised that he isn’t showing off his genius as he is prone to do, showing up the alchemist and bruising the guy’s ego in the process, however unintentional it might have been.

The third time, Roy spots him, Vanessa even comments on it as they watch him bow politely at a group, before leaving the conversation. “I thought you said he was brash and rude, Roy. The perfect image of insubordination. That doesn’t look very about to be court martial-ed to me.”

“I think Fullmetal must be possessed,” Roy confides in her, unable to come up with a better explanation.

Fullmetal then finds them in the crowd again. He sees that they’re taking a break from polite society at the food table and gratefully makes him way over to them, smoothly avoiding any advances made to talk to him.

The boy lets out a breath of relieve when he finally makes it, stuffing a bread roll in his mouth without even greeting either of them.

Roy can’t help but remark: “Where did all the politeness go, huh? We’re not good enough for your manners, Fullmetal?” driven both out of curiosity and his natural tendency to tease his short-fused subordinate.

“Oh, please,” Ed rolls his eyes, “like you wouldn’t be totally freaked out if I was suddenly polite and nice to you. You’d probably think the world was ending.”

Since he claimed Fullmetal to be possessed moments earlier, Roy isn’t really able to deny that accusation. Not that it stops him from saying: “I’ve been asking for respect for over two years now, a little bit of it would be appreciated.”

“Your comment is heard and disregarded,” Fullmetal informs him bluntly and Roy is loathe to admit that the uncaring attitude of the teen is soothing after watching him be a perfect little toy soldier.

He doesn’t show that, however, instead choosing to say: “Well, it still would have been nice. I thought you were incapable of it, honestly. I’d ask if you were raised in a barn, but I’ve seen where you grew up.”

“Oi, don’t insult Resembool,” Fullmetal glares at him.

Vanessa probably saves all of them from Fullmetal’s first explosion of the night by saying: “I do have to agree with Roy. You have quite the reputation. It’s impressive that you actually have more control over your emotions than people think.”

Though hidden by a fluttered lash, the comment is a masked question. A request for more information without the target knowing. Vanessa truly is one of Madame Christmas’s girls.

And like so many men before him, Ed falls for it. He puffs up a bit, pride flooding his veins as he says: “Of course. Underestimation is the best tool. Besides, practice makes perfect, you don’t even know how many dinners I’ve had with corrupt officials.”

Roy has to hide a laugh at Vanessa’s surprised expression. She obviously hadn’t counted on her own experiences in life being anywhere near similar to Fullmetal’s, yet here she is.

The kid is oblivious as he goes on: “But I usually get to make them fall flat on their faces the next day. Can’t very much do that here, I still need these motherfuckers. Well, maybe, not all of them, but I don’t know which ones.”

Now Roy has the same experience that Vanessa had at the earlier part, though he has the added ill feeling that he is the one that dragged the kid into this life. This world of corruption, masks and concealment.

Fullmetal looks quite sad as he laments that he doesn’t get to make the government collapse by taking out all the corrupt officials he has spoken to tonight.

However, he soon has a grin on his face again when he says: “But I get to laugh at them behind their backs, so that’s a little satisfying. And who knows what the future will bring, I might get to pull the rug out from underneath all of them.”

It’s quite the surreal feeling to see Fullmetal be aware of the games of politics Roy played in every day and not just that, but be playing it himself as well. He isn’t playing it as much as Roy, but more than he had expected from the kid.

Ed truly grew up too fast and, despite himself, Roy mourns for Fullmetal’s childhood.

However, now that he’s aware of it, he can see the sparkle of glee in Fullmetal’s eyes whenever he salutes or says sir. That little bit of defiance, like he is in on some joke and everyone else isn’t. Well, everyone else besides Roy and Vanessa.

If he allows himself to be honest with himself, Roy is a little honored that Ed let him see behind the curtain, mask lifted for a second. But Roy tries not to think about that too much. Fullmetal has to remain a little at a distance or Roy will never be able to live with himself, even if he knows that allowing Ed into the military was for the best.

So instead he chooses to be amused with the kid’s antics, following him across the room in his periphery and mentally chuckling at all the wool he’s putting over peoples’ eyes.

He might still hate military galas with a passion, but Fullmetal makes them a little bit more bearable and he can’t help but hope he will be in attendance again next time.

A/N:

I love it when Ed is a little cunning and Roy realizing it, because he thinks himself a master at chess and deception and I think it would be fun for him to see that side of Ed

#rr writing #edward elric #roy mustang #fmab #full metal alchemist #full metal alchemis brotherhood #edward elric is a little shit #major edward elric

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