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#only a few more chapters left and this shit is DONE
onmyyan · 10 hours
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Ain't no sunshine chapter 3
A/n: canon typical violence someone gets stabbed (not you) feedback is always welcome
The clock ticks in an uncomfortable rhythm, almost pounding in your ears, you swallow around nothing and try to take a deep breath, only a few more minutes now.
Sitting cross cross felt childish but you needed the comfort of being low to the ground, before you stood a proud grandfather clock, the thing always intimidated you for some reason, maybe it's because you could smell how expensive it was, how priceless, but it was the only room in the house you could guarantee would be free of any nuisances, aka your estranged family.
A lone little Debbie cupcake in hand, a candle in another, you stick the candle inside the soft flesh of the treat, lighting it with the silver zippo, the seconds begin to count down as the wax melts, today was your eighteenth birthday, and the day you'd find true freedom. A day you'd been waiting for since you'd decided to wash your hands of the Wayne's and all who associated with them.
Bruce had begun to add to his collection of broken people one by one a new face was added to the house, and one by one you were met with the same cold indifference.
Barbara Gordon came into your life warmly, on the arm of Dick, she was kind to you in the beginning, making a point to ask you questions and listening intently when you answered, immediately you admired the older woman, her charming grin and bright demeanor was like a light inside the house, until she became who you eventually discovered was Oracle, tied up in the world of heroes and monsters, she too joined the club of exclusion, unintentionally forgetting plans the two of you had made more often than not, sharing inside jokes with Dick about last night's patrol or even taking on a mentor role for Damian, each action like a stab to the heart.
The last straw felt like the smallest one. And it came in the form of Cassandra Cain.
The girl came to the family under reasons you couldn't know, but she was troubled, you could see the same look in her eyes you had when you looked in the mirror as a child, she didn't outright reject your friendship like Damian, but she was seemingly as disinterested in you as the rest of your family, the real kick to your heart came when you walked past a moment shared between her and Bruce, he was comforting her, you couldn't hear the words spoken but you could feel the love pouring from Bruce, how he had a gentle hand on her shoulder, showing her a kind of love he'd never once shown you.
It wasn't her fault and you held no grudge against her, but it still felt like a slap to the face, and every time you saw her, every time she followed them down to their little hiding spot, the acid-like sting deep in your chest got worse. It was then you made a promise to yourself, you'd stop trying, no more reaching out to Dick or praying Jason would message you back, no more begging for Tim's attention or Damian's respect, and you were sure as shit done asking Bruce to love you.
You're brought back to the present moment by the loud ring of the clock before you, the echoing sound brought a ear splitting grin to your face, finally, you were done.
Blowing out the candle, you toss it on the floor, standing with a pep in your step. You'd had your bags moved out days ago so the only thing left was to leave. A chatter could be heard the closer you got to the front door, male and female voices happily spoke with one another, but you were so unfazed, too excited about your current plans to care they'd gathered without you on your birthday.
"Oh hey (Y/n)" Dick says after spotting your form in the doorway, see the only reason you were here is because the dining room lead to the front door, and your new found freedom.
You nod at him, taking in the sight of popcorn and half empty pizza boxes, a movie projected on the wall, ah so they decided to have a little get together?
None of your concern.
"Sorry we didn't call you down, didn't realize you were home" Dick says a look of pity in his eyes, "do you want some?" It's almost said with a wince.
"Nah." Was your simple response, and with that you walked out of their door and lives.
You'd bought an apartment with your own money, you'd been working since you were fourteen, saving every penny for this moment exactly. It was in a shit part of town with an even shitter interior but it was yours and you loved it. Water dripped into a mostly full bucket in the corner, the lights took a full forty seconds to turn on and it reeked of old cigarettes.
Yet you couldn't wipe the smile off your face.
Feeling that euphoric rush had you buzzing all night, besides the bed in your room was, questionable to say the least, so you decided to stay up. Cleaning what you could with what you had made you feel even better, this terrible little space was all yours, no condescending people or assholes in sight.
Feeling hungry, you throw on a black puffer coat and a matching beanie and start to brave the Gotham cold. Each step is taken with a new gratitude, the farther you get from that family the better you feel.
Your happiness is pulled to a grinding halt by the sound of rapid footsteps behind you, without thinking you turn, fist balled tightly in perfect form, Patty would be proud if she saw the way you decked the bastard running up on you.
You nailed him right in the throat sending him to his knees, his knife cluttering to the ground before your feet, grabbing the weapon you point it down at his choking body, your hands still despite your rapid heartbeat. The wheezing man made a swipe at your ankles causing you to bring the knife down right into his shoulder, a scream rips though his throat, the adrenaline in your body has you running on autopilot.
Kicking him in the side of the head to quickly sprint to the corner store where you'd planned on going in the first place, your hands shake as you grab your food, but again, that smile stays on your face.
Not only had you moved out today, you'd proved to yourself you didn't need them for anything, not protection, not validation, nothing, it was like you could breathe again.
The next few weeks are business as usual at the manor, until Barbara looks at the calendar and realizes she'd, along with everyone, had forgotten your birthday. The guilt ate at her until she made her way to your room knocking softly, a cupcake in hand she called out, "(Y/n)? Listen I'm so sorry about your birthday, I got my dates mixed up." The lie came easy, but no response was heard, "I get if you're completely pissed at me, at us but-"
"Miss (L/n) has moved out."
"what? How is that possible we would have noticed her moving out." As if to prove Alfred wrong Barbara opens your door, only to find a barren room, empty of any signs of life. She turns to the older man, a thousand questions burning on her tongue, but he seemed to read her, "you'd be surprised what goes unnoticed in this house miss Gordon, have a good afternoon." He leaves her with this and it only makes the guilt and confusion worse.
She pulls out her phone scrolling to a number she hadn't used in a while, biting her thumb as it rings she's hoping you clear all her confusion when you answered, but you don't, instead an automated message tells her your phone has been disconnected. Now she begins to worry, you were so young, just barely an adult, the idea of you out on your own in Gotham had her heart sinking, clicking the family group chat she sends a message that will change everything.
"We need to talk about (Y/n)."
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funkle420 · 1 day
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im so happy classes are done and for the first time in a long time i dont have any classes for summer! that means i can draw more!!!
#not art#rambling again#id meant to save up enough money so i wouldn't have to work too... but then i kept spending it on food...#and other real emergencies#and comics...#and other shit#ill still be fine but i definitely have to open coms all summer now#but im gonna also get thru a chapter of minor vamp!! or volume?? idk chapter volume issue whatever#im gonna do a chunk of it#wanna have something i can print and sell#and im gonna make a lot of doodles and fan art#prob dunneshi and one piece mostly#and im gonna read thru all the comics i have#and go to the library to read more#and... maybe i should try to either find a summer job if possible or apply for some grants........ if i even qualify#ill ask my professors about grants i could get#i feel like grants are always for fine artists and performance artists and other “respectable” artists#not cartoonists...#i should also practice animating#ooo the internship inwanted got postponed till fall so i still have time to apply#and my prof said i have a rare talent for comics#its a comic studio internship at one of the big ones#if i get that it could help me get a real job later#i dont remember if it pays but i dont think so#its like a few hrs a week type of thing#i should also apply for other interships#and ask my profs abt ways i can get money out of the school lol#god im almost done too... i think i graduate in winter or spring so like a year or less left for me#then only 6 months more before i have to start paying my student debt.........#i need a good paying job for that shit
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gay-dorito-dust · 1 month
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can I request batboys with an s/o who shows affection with biting?
it’s kinda stupid, but it could be cute, or they’re weirded out.
I don’t know, whatever you think ❤️
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Idk why but I like the idea of Tim absolutely reading people to filth, this might just be me but I like it.
Dick would yelp when you first bit him on the neck, instinctively pressing a hand there and look at you with a pout.
‘I know I’m an absolute snack but I didn’t think I’d see the day where you’d try and take a bite out of me.’ He whined as he rubbed his neck, feeling exactly where you bit him from the teeth marks and wetness you left behind.
He loves it when you bite him but he can’t help in being dramatic when your bite marks are left in the most visible places where anybody could see them and speculate.
‘What if people ask if I like being bit?’ Dick would gasp, looking at the marks through the mirror, whimpering slightly when lightly grazing them. ‘What if they think I like being marked?’
‘Well you obviously do because not once had you stopped me once from biting you. Not once.’ You replied from your place on the bed, looking up from your phone to stare at him through the reflective surface. ‘If anything I think I heard you whimper a few times whenever I bite your neck.’ You add, smirking upon seeing Dick’s face grow flustered.
Dick wouldn’t admit it but he did like it when you bit him, probably more then he should, but he loved the fact that whenever you bit him you were only reassuring him that he was yours and you were his, albeit in your own unique way of affection.
Jason would bite you back purely out of retaliation but it’s mainly on your cheek or shoulders that he bites.
He lives for the little yelps you give when he does bite down on your shoulder lightly, smirking like the cheeky shit he could be at times.
He’ll proudly display the bite marks to anyone who was getting too comfortable with him for his own liking, by pulling down the collar of his shirt and showing off your bite marks across his collar bone and says with his whole chest ‘I’m taken.’
Once you both were lying on bed and were just about ready to fall asleep, but your eyes honed in on his bare upper body, more specifically his big tiddies. Jason -who had just put down his book after finishing a chapter- gave you a look and said ‘don’t you fucking dare-‘ but it was already too late as you opened your mouth and bite down on his left tiddy, staying there for a good deal of time.
Jason only sighs and pets your head, pressing a kiss there and whispers. ‘What am I going to do with you?’ To which you respond cheekily with. ‘Love me?’
Jason couldn’t help but chuckle. ‘I can think of a few ways to do that.’ But before you could ask what he meant with that, he then proceeded to bite down your neck, causing you to squeak.
However when Jason bites you, it looks at though you’ve been bites by a fucking vampire, mainly because he’s got four distinctly sharp dentures and you had developed somewhat a love/hate relationship with it, much to Jason’s amusement.
‘Hey! You do it to me so why shouldn’t I do it to you?’ He’d say with his hands raised but a smile on his face and mischievous glint in his eyes. He loves it more than he lets on, he just likes to meet you on equal footing.
He calls you his little piranha.
Tim would look at you as if to say ‘are you done?’
He’s perpetually tired from everything, so you biting him to show affection doesn’t phase him in the slightest.
You could bite his bicep and he’d be like ‘love you too you menace.’ Before taking a sip from his mug as he went about the rest of his day, uncaring of the bite mark already forming on his bicep.
However whenever Tim feels as though he’s missing you, he’d just brush his fingers over the bite mark and remind himself that you were waiting for him to come back…and probably bite him as a way to show him that you missed him also, but he really didn’t mind.
If anything his only request is that you don’t bite him anywhere his brothers could see them, they’ve already teased him enough about being with you that seeing a single bite mark would send them into utter insanity. They’d would never him live it down and would forever tease him into hell and back for it, especially Damian and Jason.
Even if you did accidentally leave a bite mark on a viable part of him and someone teases him for it, all he has for do is look them in the eye and say ‘at least I got someone who makes me really happy, and who isn’t afraid of showing me that they love me just as equally without feeling ashamed.’ He stops and looks them over with a look. ‘Which is more than I can say for you, the only real relationship you have is with a box of tissues, lube and a shitty computer system that’s on the verge of collapse.’ He adds before stalking off, leaving the person to wonder how Tim knew about the shitty computer, a shitty computer that was currently being held together by duck tape of all things.
All in all, Tim doesn’t mind you biting him in a display of affection, just don’t do so in areas where his family will take notice of and start asking really uncomfortable questions…
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thatdeadaquarius · 7 months
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About your language brainrot. I see your "Reader's writing can't match tyvat's long and flowery writing" and bring you "Tyvat isn't used to books over 50 pages long so a short story to the Reader is a whole dictionary to tyvat readers".
Seriously, have you seen how thin the books are? They don't wrote novels, they write short chapters formatted in the way really old stories are. As in, summarizing all the events down into one smooth story then adding a few quotes. Fanfiction writers are insane. They will willingly sit down and write hundreds of words at a time. To them, a proper modern day story of maybe, oh 10k words or so, would probably be like the Oddessy itself.
If we were to combine the two headcanons. It would end up as many historians being intimidated by this insanely long written scripture in the language of the forgotten.
I'm going to take this a step further and say that if the creator asked some people to proofread their things, it would establish a hiarchy of who is able to actually finish the book the creator read and who isn't.
NOW THIS, THIS IS MY FUCKING JAMMMM
I'm so sorry this is so old!! u probably all know this by this point that I've really slowed down as the year has gone on, but I graduated university and then got my first job so its been pretty crazy!
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Sun: Reader (you/they/them)
Orbit: Headcanons-ish
Stars: dash of all the book/nerds of Genshin, heavy on Sumeru?
Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: Cussing, 16+ Mature Audiences, Spoliers for Sumeru Archon Quests/Scaramouche, & Trigger Warnings: mention of shipping/characters shipping themselves with you.
Comment if any missed, please.
FULL STOP.
THE AKADEMIYA, FONTAINE RESEARCH INSTITUTE, HAVE BEEN WAITTTINNGGGG ON YOUR ASS LMAO
You fall from the fucking sky like a 5 star, or pop out of the Irminsul or whatever
and immediately are mobbed by scholars. LMAO jkjk (not really, bc that's what it’d feel like)
can you even imagine the dread older stories(”the classics” to them), that was instilled in the poor students around Teyvat??
id like to think ur works are the most preserved over the thousands of years of Teyvat archeologists excavating them, in comparison to other authors (teyvat just likes you more, suck it William Shakespeare)
also, bc I cant resist language differences/world building I'm sorryyyy 😭 😭
the vocab of Genshin lang vs. ours, has significantly less vocabulary like their actual dictionary is 1/3 the size of ours type of energy
(Omfg all ur fanfics being considered like insanely long realistic romantic classics or tragedies like Jane Austen-level, and only the richest and biggest play companies put on plays about ur stories bc the script goes on for hours)
(ur plays only get put on for rlly big events bc of this, like Lantern Rite or like a Summer/Winter festival/your birthday, which is, yes, an international holiday)
dude the sheer power move of anything you’ve written being essentially “Journey of the West” to them, like Damnnn.
endless like adaptations, plays, Teyvat-short stories condensing it, (THEIR OWN FANFICTION ABOUT UR STORIES)
the power is, in fact, going to your head every time another scholar both deflates at how long ur stuff is, but also lights up bc they get to read it
speaking of scholars… you know who snatched you up first. you know. you don’t even need to read the next line.
Alhaitham.
sneaky bastard he is, absolutely manipulated, mansplained (and manwhored bc he knows he’s handsome, cheeky little shit) his way into getting you to sit down with him and interview you about both translating other classics, your own, giving your own analysis of others works and ur own, and picking ur brain apart of how/why you wrote urs, etc. its fucking endless,
Kaveh had to come rescue you bc u were starving to death after getting stuck with the Haravatat scholar in his office for nearly 7 hours of interrogation discussion about literature
and Alhaitham wasn't even nearly done, he’d informed you as you left that he already had another appointment for later conversation scheduled (how?? you don't even know ur own schedule??? you have a schedule???) and was looking forward to more of your “creative and enlightening input” :)))
(you’re never going to escape him, not even Nahida herself can save you from his stubborn ass)
On another note, Xingqiu is quaking when you agree to autograph his copy of your stories (of which he has all hard covers of the first edition translations)
Zhongli/Rex Lapis is known for having a near-lifelong passion for searching for your works specifically, and learning how to translate them better into Teyvatian vernacular
like the same way he can absolutely speak on Rex Lapis facts/rocks/adepti info, is the same confidence he speaks about knowing ur work lol
(yes he did also ask for several autographs and another sit-down talk about the works, tho a lot more sneaky then Alhaitham bc he just casually gets u guys into it during dinner)
Barbatos/Venti has written some of the most famous songs based on your stuff, he has his favorites too,
but he always claims the best songs are any that have been written in the story, like either when a character sings something, or there are like quotes from songs ur fanfics are based on lol
(he also demanded to hear what they actually sound like from you, yes, you have to sing them for him lol)
Venti also can surprisingly drunkenly ramble the entirety of at least one of ur stories, like, word for word lmao
(Diluc gave in and did give him a drink on the house for that one, just once, Venti doesn’t remember it lol)
(I forgot to mention, u guys still speak the same language, just like, different versions of it)
ur works being one of the few things all the Archons can freely talk about with each other, like it’s neutral ground bc they’re all fangirling about it lmao
Furina and Neuvillette have had like,, fierce debates over the decades about character dynamics and the general drama of ur stories, they’ve gotten into it enough they’ve stopped talking to each other for a couple days a few times lol
Albedo, Sucrose, Kokomi, Yae Miko, Ei, Raiden, have read every single work they’re gotten their hands on in Teyvat (it took them like a literal year or longer)
Albedo drew you fanart for every single story, bc he’s hyperfixated on everything related to you ngl,
Kokomi had commissioned smaller pocket versions of ur works (which later got popular thanks to Yae Miko) both the OG and the Teyvat shortened versions
THE HARBINGERS ARE THE MOST DOWN BAD LMAO
Childe has literally tried to recreate battle scenes from ur works lmao
and gets especially riled up about fighting someone who resembles any characters from them (esp villains, what a cutie)
You cannot fathom the amount of research throughout Teyvat that has been secretly or indirectly funded by Pantalone/Tsaritsa
from the experts to analyze them, to funding play companies to act them out, to actually excavating places to get more of ur stuff unearthed
(the Harbingers absolutely are the first group of people that got to read several of ur stories first bc of this, like the world’s most exclusive secret book club lol)
Scaramouche used to clown on Childe all the time about how he was too impatient to even “sit down and read the King’s classics”, and he was downright insufferable when he found out about Tartaglia’s habit of recreating battle scenes/that being what motivated him to fight sometimes lol
that being said, Wanderer surprisingly never forgot ur stories.
Even when his memories were wiped for a bit, he found comfort in these fantastical epics still sticking around, even when his old names did not
(he mayyyy or mayyy nottt have secretly namedhimselfafteroneofthetragicprotagonistsherelatesto- )
oh btw, Nahida also found joy and comfort in ur stories when she was trapped, they also helped her literally grow as a person bc she had ur stories to help her sort of process the world/what life was like outside of her dreaming prison 🥺💔❤️‍🩹
OMFG
ANYWAY FULL TONE SHIFT LMFAO-
the ABSOLUTE SPIRAL-RED-STRING-CONSPIRACY-THEORY-BOARD ENERGY IF THIS WAS A BLUNT LANGUAGE AU LMAOOOO
like specifically how Teyvatians like to give all the context ever thru their words, but older deities/beings like you just do simple phrases that can have deeper meanings (whereas teyvat just explains all the meanings behind their words)
STOP there’s like an official display at the Akademiya and Fontaine Institute of red string theory boards 😭😭 (look what you’ve done to themmm LMAO)
for like every story of urs, INCLUDING THE FANFICS STOP
IMAGINE THE SHIPPING WARS IF U EVER WROTE ONE THAT WASNT EXPLICIT OR LIKE ONE OF THE MAIN ROMANTIC INTERESTS HAD CHEMISTRY WITH OTHER CHARACTERS HAHAHAHAA
that's actually what Akademiya scholars argue about the most viciously, it’s like politics you can’t just bring up ships from ur stories casually in regular convos 💀
(poor Cyno has to deal with a shipping war once a year bc someone always makes the mistake of reading ur work for the first time (without being told to not talk to others abt ships lol) and it starts an all out brawl in the cafeteria every time LMAO)
Also yes.
Cyno is a fanboy.
(he has read Creator x Reader-insert fanfiction.)
(As have most of the characters mentioned, and those not lol)
(I'm gonna make a whole Creator x reader fanfic post one day i stg lmao)
an iced coffee? for me?? :0
ok but real talk…
wtf do you guys wanna see for new years!!
i didn't do a inktober/october days thingy bc i felt too unprepared (and bc id wanted to post that 1000+ followers eldritch au for Halloween)
but now i kinda wanna, at least for a few days :o
ill post a poll in a minute, so check it out!! but still, please feel free to comment some ideas here! :)
Safe Travels Deafening Dreamer,
💀♒
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♡the beloveds♡
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks / @devilangel657 / @esthelily
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eternalxvenus · 3 months
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⇢ ˗ˏˋ broken promises pt. 2 ࿐ྂ
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summary: Rafe promised to take you out and spend your birthday with you, but you don’t hear from him all day and then suddenly he shows up at your door trying to explain. (this is part 2 to the birthday girl angst blurb! i changed the title for the series so it was more appealing)
cw: mentions of drug use, angst, nothing crazy (yet lmao)
wc: 1.2k
notes: i'm excited to write this since its my first series! lmk if there's anything you guys would wanna see in future chapters :)
previous chapters: part 1
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You wake up to your alarm droning on annoyingly and feel around aimlessly with your eyes closed to turn it off. Once you had finally woken up on your own accord, you realized you should talk to Rafe. You hadn't spoken to him or left your house the last few days. Obviously, you missed him, but you just felt so hurt and angry with him.
After getting ready and using makeup to look a little more alive and less blotchy from crying so much, you decided you'd go up to Tannyhill to try and talk to Rafe. You left your house, hopped on your bike, and started towards the estate. The whole ride there, you just kept going over what you wanted to say but nothing seemed right. Before you knew it, you were at the front entrance.
You walked inside and heard voices in the distance coming from upstairs. Once you made your way upstairs, you heard the voices more clearly coming from Rafe's room. It was Rafe and another person whose voice you couldn't pinpoint.
"Come on, man you gotta understand where I'm comin' from. I've just been stressed out. Nothing a good time won't fix."
You looked into the room and saw Rafe sitting with some guy you've never seen. There was a table in between them that had some rolled-up bills and coke sitting on it.
You walked inside the room, still unnoticed until you spoke. "Hey, Rafe."
Both of their heads snapped in your direction, and Rafe immediately shot up, walking towards you.
"Shit... I uh- I didn't know you were coming over." He looked back at the man who just sat there unbothered. "Barry, can you uh give us a minute..."
"So let me get this straight, you went to a party and got high, missed my entire birthday, and after I tell you I'm pissed off your next line of action is to get high again with your drug dealer, right?"
Before Rafe could speak, Barry grabbed his stuff and started walking out. "A'ight man hit me up when y'all are done dealing with this shit."
Rafe waited until he thought Barry was far enough before closing the door and speaking, "Can you blame me? I don't hear from you for days so I assumed you didn't wanna be with me anymore! I tried to talk to you and you straight up ignored me."
"I was angry Rafe! I just needed some time to myself. That doesn't mean I'm breaking up with you and it doesn't mean you should start doing drugs again when that is quite literally what we fought about." 
This definitely wasn't how you imagined this conversation going. You didn't want to argue with him but your pride wasn't going to let you just back down.
"If you wanted space you could've told me," he sighed. "And I am sorry that I got high at that party and I'm sorry I missed your birthday okay? I want to make it up to you."
You walked over to the bed and sat down for a moment with your head in your hands. You loved Rafe, you really did. But you didn't want him falling into his old habits and lying to you about it.
You both sat there in silence as you thought about what you should do and what you should say.
"Rafe I... I think we should just take some time apart. Get our heads straight and figure out what we want-"
He walked over and sat next to you his eyes wide. "Baby I want you, I want to be with you."
"I wanna be with you too, Rafe, but I have conditions. I don't want you doing coke anymore. I don't like the person you are when you get like that. I know you get stressed and feel like it's your only option but you have me. Or maybe try weed and see how that works for you. I also don't want you hanging with Barry anymore. Non-negotiables."
He nods "I swear I'll work on it and I'll talk to Barry. I swear."
You stand up from the bed getting ready to go out the door. "Rafe... I'm gonna go stay with my parents on the mainland for a few days. I'll be in contact but please try your best to just leave me be. Get clean, for good, and I'll let you know when I'm back and we can figure everything out. Okay?"
He shakes his head. You can see that he's angry and confused, your heart just aches. "The mainland? What- why? Just stay here, I don't understand-"
"Please, Rafe. This is what we have to do okay?"
He took a few deep breaths and ran his hands through his hair. "Okay... okay. When you get back, I'll have made it up to you. Just promise me we aren't over." 
You could see the tears that formed in his eyes and had to fight back your own. "We aren't over just yet." You gave him a kiss on the cheek before leaving his room and heading home.
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You were finally off the ferry and on the mainland to stay with your parents. You really wanted to talk to your best friend to get advice so you asked her to pick you up. By the time you reached your house, she was all caught up. Your parents weren't home so you both went straight up to your childhood bedroom.
"Damn... I didn't think he got down like that." Niki looked at you slightly surprised. "Honestly though, it sounds like does care about you, even if he did fuck up."
"Yeah, I know he cares I just... I don't wanna have to worry about shit like this. Whenever he's all coked up he makes irrational and bad decisions. I'm just worried he'll do something and end up in jail or worse."
"You just have to let him know that. Make sure he knows your anger comes from a place of care. If he feels like you're just judging him, it'll probably piss him off."
You sigh and groan into your pillow. "You're right, thanks Niki."
"Don't mention it. Now, let me catch you up on the mainland gossip!" she squealed.
⭑*•̩̩͙⊱✩•̩̩͙⊰•*⭑
Niki had gone home and you were getting into bed, ready to sleep after what felt like an exceptionally long day, when your phone chimed. You looked and saw you had a text from Rafe.
Rafe: hey I just wanted to make sure you made it to the mainland safely.
You: yes I did, i'm at my parent's house, thanks for asking.
Rafe: of course, goodnight
You: goodnight
Placing your phone on the dresser, you're thankful he doesn't push the conversation further. You decide you'll only stay here for three days before going back to the island to figure things out with Rafe. You just hope he can work on staying clean and that you can go back to being together like normal. 
As you closed your eyes, ready for sleep, you heard another chime from your phone. You groaned before picking it up to check.
Topper: hey we need to talk, it's about Rafe.
part 3
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likes, comments, and blogs are greatly appreciated!
taglist: @readingsmuts @1aarii1 @bingbongbum @stargirlsturniololover @babygirl229 @poisonedsultana @rafescamshoe
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matrixbearer2024 · 4 months
Text
Roller Rinking, Dancing and Dreaming
Vox x CollegeStudent!Reader
A/N: I went roller skating with some friends and one of them pitched the idea of a date at the roller rink with Vox and Reader, though it's not really a date anymore for those two since the Hazbin Hotel crew tagged along because Charlie didnt realize that this was supposed to be a special occasion. Oh and Alastor is just going to be kind of a sore thumb because it's funny. Also found this pic of Vox(it's not my art and I don't know who drew it HELP-) but it's his getup for his and Reader's date because I will not have this flatscreen idiot take us out in his fucking work clothes. Velvette give this man a proper wardrobe PLEASE-
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A/N: I'm probably going to write a lot of date ideas between Vox and (Y/N) to prolong the slow-burn and also so I can include the other characters anyway- so if you guys have any other ideas- go ahead and drop them down below and I'll try to fit the ones I think would work best! As always, happy reading and I hope you guys enjoy!
A/N: Final note- but this was the song I was listening to while writing this long LONG chapter so if you guys wanna vibe to it while reading go ahead lolol- Song's called: "Shut Up And Dance" by Walk The Moon.
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If there was one word Vox would use to describe you, it had to be crazy.
Or cute, but that was besides the point-
He'd always thought your ideas couldn't get any wilder, only to be proven wrong in at the very least a few hours.
Especially when he was reminded of the time you made a papercraft of his clothes while he was stuck to your TV screen.
And the time you sent him earrape audio during a meeting for no reason?
And calling coffee "Bean Juice"?
He could go on and on about the random insane things you would do periodically.
But because he grew so used to it-
More like he always ended up looking forward to your entertaining shenanigans-
The first thing Vox had done was give you a new VoxTech phone with your custom app on it.
At this point, he defaulted to using it if he were to check on you anyway and you had no complaints.
Alastor gave you both shit for bringing tech into the hotel only to get flipped off by the two of you anyway.
Lucifer had to stop himself from laughing because the deer was practically throwing a tantrum at being so nonchalantly brushed off-
Vox chuckled as he reminisced about it.
That was all few days ago, and it seems like you've settled into hell quite nicely.
You made friends with nearly everyone at the hotel, save a certain radio cannibal who you also liked to annoy-
And you'd even met Velvette on one occasion.
Well, more like Vox wanted to fashion you a wardrobe but didn't trust himself to pick good outfit combinations so he just entrusted the task to his fashionista colleague-
What he didn't expect was for the both of you to hit it off fairly quickly after that and ended up staying in touch online.
Vox even wondered at times if you were talking to Velvette more than him already but didn't think about it too much-
You haven't been to the Vee tower since that outfit shopping spree and well, you kind of understood why.
Especially after what you heard about Valentino from both Vox and Angel Dust.
That pimp guy was just someone you did not want to be around.
So that just left your TV headed buddy with no choice but to visit the hotel more and more.
Not that either of you cared much about how irked Alastor got because both of you and sometimes even Lucifer would often gang up on him-
Vox never really stayed, after all redemption didn't seem to be his thing with a whole media empire to run-
But sometimes you would force him to humor Charlie and try some of the activities, teasing him about it and saying he was cringe whenever he got awkward.
Vox just chuckled as he looked back on a lot of the moments you both had together, twirling a pen in his hand while he fondly remembered.
Of course until he eventually forced himself to stop daydreaming and focus back on the stack of paperwork in front of him.
He hadn't even really begun and honestly he didn't know if he wanted to.
It was busy days like these where he couldn't wait to visit and see you, work was stressful enough so just hanging around you and turning his brain off to your nonsense was enough of a distraction.
Ah whatever, that was enough of procrastinating.
It was a little while of him working on and checking the stack of documents on his table before his phone rang.
Vox didn't even bother to check the caller ID and just answered it because he was in work-mode.
So he almost ended up snapping his pen in two from sheer surprise when he heard your voice through the call.
"Heeeeey Vox? You free this weekend?"
The overlord just glanced over at his schedule and figured he could clear up a day or two.
It was only a day until the weekend after all.
He'd have to work double-time until then just to make up for the load but he didn't see a problem with it when the trade-off was spending more time with you.
"I could free up my schedule, why? Did you have something planned dollface?"
"Kinda, I heard there's a new roller rink disco club around the block and I wanted to go!"
"And you're telling me this, why?"
"Because I want you to go with me, duhhhh!"
Vox looked over some of the papers he had on his table absentmindedly and hummed.
Admittedly, you asking him about it first was kind of flattering- even if you knew he was a very busy guy.
He would often drop whatever he was doing just to help you if you needed it after all, so him rearranging his schedule on the fly like this wasn't anything new.
"So kind of like a date?"
He grinned when he heard you stutter and fumble over your words.
The overlord could only imagine just how red and flustered you were at the moment.
You'd always found ways to embarrass him back then when you were alive, so now he was just kindly returning the favor.
"N-no! Well- kind of? I don't know! Just wear something nice!"
"Sure doll, I guess I'll see you then?"
"Mhm, see you!"
Vox stared fondly at his phone when you ended the call, a smile working onto his face as he chuckled.
Who knew it was because of this specific little gadget that brought you guys together in the first place.
Putting the phone down, he cracked his knuckles and gave his table a once over.
It was covered in papers of all kinds but if he started now he could probably get it finished before tomorrow.
You threw your phone onto a nearby cushion and covered your face with your hands.
That stupid TV was too charming for his own good-
You grumbled slightly and crossed your arms, sometimes you doubted if Vox really even meant all the words he says-
Did it come so naturally to him to just be that charismatic?
But at the same time the guy could be a real annoying piece of work-
You really felt like just another sucker who couldn't decide whether you wanted to hug the overlord or strangle him.
"Heya toots! What's got you so worked up?"
"Hey Angel, just- dealing with Vox I guess?"
"Seriously? That's what you're all hung up about?"
"Hey! I'm not- hung up about it-! He's just so annoying."
"For once we can agree on something it seems!"
You screamed when Alastor suddenly appeared at your side, falling off the area of the couch where you were sitting.
If there was one thing you hated that the two media broadcast overlords had in common was that they loved loved LOVED to just sneak up on you.
It was getting really old and really tiring.
Frankly you had already been sick of Vox being a cheeky little shit doing it- you didn't need his rival to join in-
"Nobody asked for your opinion Al, and don't you have some murder to orchestrate or something?"
"HaHA! Not at the moment! Why, if you wanted to join me on my excursions you could've said so my dear!"
"Eugh- hard pass old geezer. Besides, I'll be busy this weekend."
"Really? With what?"
"Gonna go to that new roller rink disco club down the block. I used to go roller skating when I was a kid but eventually stopped as I grew older."
You figured it would be wise to leave out the fact you were going with Vox, you didn't need to arm Alastor any more ammunition to mess with you or his rival.
Thing is, you didn't necessarily notice just what chaos sharing your weekend plans would entail.
"Well if you're already going there, why not take the others with you?"
Oh fuck.
You forgot about Charlie.
Now you really wished you had kept your mouth shut, the last thing you wanted to do was hurt her feelings when she'd been nothing but nice to you.
"Okay hold on-"
Alastor couldn't help widening his grin when he saw your worried expression, well this was certainly going to get interesting.
"What a wonderful idea my dear! Perhaps I should go observe what this brand new establishment has to offer as well!"
"You antique motherfucker-"
Your fluffy deer ears pinned back as you glared at the radio demon, he really had to be toying with you when he said that.
Especially if what Husk had said in the past was anything to go by.
Alastor didn't like going to clubs or places that were similarly just as noisy and obnoxious.
So he was really just trying to shove you deeper into the grave you'd dug yourself.
"That's great Al! Maybe you could even find some more ideas for the hotel while you're there!"
You just covered your face in your hands, so much for just spending time with just Vox this weekend-!
How the hell were you even supposed to tell him about this??
"Yeaaaahhh... greaaaat..."
You weakly mumbled, tiredly looking up at Angel who just gave you an apologetic shrug.
You just gave up trying to mention otherwise when everyone else seemed more than eager for this weekend.
So much for your original plan.
By the time the weekend rolled around, you got yourself all dressed pretty with a casual top and jeans.
You decided against wearing anything that would leave your legs exposed since you didn't know if you'd fall down a bunch while rollerskating.
It was a while since you could remember the last time you tried.
Grabbing your phone and some necessities, you left your room and went to wait in the hotel lobby for the others to get ready.
"Vox where are you going?"
The overlord nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard a familiar voice from behind him.
He swiveled around to see the youngest Vee just deadpanning at him.
Geez, and he thought he was being sneaky too.
"Ah! Velvette! Just- heading out. No reason."
"It's your date with (Y/N) isn't it?"
"It's not- oh whatever, what do you want?"
His colleague gave him an annoyed once over and the tech overlord just raised an eyebrow at her.
What was she planning this time?
"You aren't leaving wearing that."
"My suit? What's wrong with it?"
"For the occasion? Everything. Now come on- let's see if I can put something together for you."
While Vox didn't question what his colleague meant, he just followed Velvette to her studio when she gestured for him to.
He initially wanted to wear something other than his work clothes but after looking at the options in his closet he immediately went against the idea.
The last thing he wanted to do was embarrass you by arriving underdressed.
"Nope. Too formal. Too risqué. Too boring. Too colorful- Aha! There! How's that?"
Looking at himself in a nearby mirror, Vox straightened the blazer he wore with a smile.
A light blue turtleneck with some loose slacks and a dark blazer on top, plus a pair of sneakers in his colors to throw together the whole ensemble.
He didn't have his hat this time, but he figured it was probably for the better that he didn't.
Comfortable but still dapper, he liked it.
"Your outfits are impeccable as always Velvette."
"Yeah yeah, you owe me one for this Vox. Now get going or you'll be late!"
The overlord didn't bother to ask his colleague about how she knew about his plans- you could've told her about it online for all he knew.
Instead, Vox just waved back at his colleague as he walked out the entrance of the building feeling excited to see you again.
So you could imagine his irritation when he met you at the club and saw everyone from the hotel there as well.
So much for it being a date-
"What the fuck are they doing here?"
He angrily whispered to you while the others were busy exploring the new building.
Pop music blared over the speakers as the lights flashed around.
A bunch of sinners were skating around the large rink that probably took up more than half of the whole club, some were just dancing around the sides outside of the rink.
It was exactly like an old disco club with the bar and even the older style furniture and aesthetic.
"Charlie suggested everyone come along and Alastor insisted, it wasn't like I had a choice."
You grit out in reply, crossing your arms and feeling slightly just as grumpy about the situation as your flatscreen companion.
"Whatever, we can still enjoy ourselves can't we?"
Admittedly, Vox looked pretty good in this new outfit.
You hadn't seen him in anything but his trademark blue coat and red vest he wore for work so this was something new.
And it was a good new, you'd thank Velvette later.
The overlord just smiled at you and nodded, leaving the others in the group to just explore as you both went and bought some skates for the rink.
More like Vox just didn't want to use the rental ones so he bought you each a pair to keep-
"(Favorite color)? You shouldn't have."
"Figured if I was getting something, might as well get the one you'd prefer."
Your giggle was nearly drowned out by the loud music but Vox still heard it, a soft smile forming on his face as he watched you eagerly put on your new skates.
"Honestly didn't think you'd remember about it, I think I only mentioned it once."
"Kind of hard to forget things when you've got a computer for a brain dollface."
You just lightly bumped his shoulder in jest before standing up and twirling on your new wheels.
Thankfully you could still remember how to work them, even if it was a long time ago since you'd done this kind of thing.
"Do they fit okay?"
"Pretty well actually, how'd you know my size?"
"Just guessed, I might be lucky today."
You just playfully rolled your eyes at his response, of course he'd pat himself on the back for that.
It didn't take long for Vox to eventually wear his own set of skates, he just had no idea how to stand.
"Come on! It's not that hard, I'll teach you!"
The overlord stared at your outstretched hands for a moment before taking them and standing up.
Again with the fuzzy feeling in his chest- what the hell-
The both of you wobbled for a second while your companion got used to the new center of gravity.
"Would you believe it if I said I have never ever done this before?"
"I think it kinda shows ya goof."
You continued to hold his hand as you showed Vox how to move forward, unfortunately for you- his sense of balance wasn't quite that great and you both ended up crashing to the floor.
The overlord landing on his ass and you landing on top of him.
The both of you exchanged a look before bursting into laughter.
You were slightly thankful for the strobing lights of the club, otherwise you were pretty sure Vox would've easily seen the blush on your face.
He was kind of cute when he seemed to just be enjoying himself...
You just shoved that thought to the back of your mind and stood up again, holding a hand out for your companion to take.
"You're not gonna learn if you just sit down like that ya know? Come on! I wanna get inside the rink!"
Vox just looked at you amused, taking your hand and hefting himself to his feet again.
He could practically feel the energy just radiating off you, the bright excitement in your eyes even as you lead him to the entrance of the rink with much less struggle this time around.
You were just adorable, you'd let go of his hand to twirl around the center of the roller rink to the beat of the music.
Vox just found himself smiling again as he approached you.
If being beside you meant he could watch and see you like this?
He would gladly take that position in a heartbeat.
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golden-cherry · 1 year
Text
deal - cl16 (7/?)
Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Reader
Series Summary: Your whole life has gone to shit. Your boyfriend broke up with you, you just lost your job and the Monegasque, who suddenly stands in your doorway, claims that it’s his apartment.
Chapter Summary: Having a movie night is a good way to spend the evening with your roommate. If it were not for the wine that loosens the mouth.
Warnings: TENSION, FLIRTING (you've been warned), alcohol consumption, a Charles picture (badly edited), Cars (movie)
Word Count: 3k
series masterlist
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A/N: I'm sitting here like a fourteen year old whose crush admitted to liking her. that's how I'm feeling about this chapter. feedback is appreciated!
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"You're kidding me."
"I would never."
Charles sets his wine glass on the coffee table as you clutch yours, though there's not a sip left in it. "How have you made it through life so far?"
You shrug. Charles looks at you with a look like you kicked a dog and insulted his mother. "I never got around to it."
That's only half the truth. Since you moved out of your parents' house, you'd actually had plenty of time to catch up on that sort of thing. But at some point you had decided for yourself that it was too late to get into it in your early twenties, when you should theoretically be out of it.
Apparently Charles doesn't see it that way. He reaches for the remote control and presses a few buttons until first a castle and then a bouncing lamp appear on the television in front of you. He then presses the stop button and turns back to you. "Get comfortable, because you're not getting off this couch again until we're done here." He places the bowl of popcorn between you on the couch. "And if you fall asleep, you'll have to watch the movie again."
You pour yourself some more wine and take a big gulp. As some of it runs out of the corner of your mouth, you wipe it away with the back of your hand. "Aren't we too old for this?"
Charles raises an eyebrow before pressing the play button. The screen goes black and you hear someone take a deep breath in and out before an off-screen voice says okay, here we go. focus. The grin on your roommate's face grows so wide it almost touches an ear. Speed. I am speed.
"You're never too old for Cars."
Apparently Charles not only works in the car industry, but is obsessed with cars. And even more so with this film. 
Out of the corner of your eye you can see that he is silently moving his mouth to speak along with every single character while you sit next to it, eating popcorn and drinking your wine. 
The beginning of the film doesn't particularly captivate you. An arrogant car with no team spirit as the protagonist. For sure he would make friends in the course of the film and appreciate them and then he wins his race. Very predictable. Even for a children's film. 
All you have to do now is stand there and let me look at you, Lightning McQueen says to the Porsche and you cringe.
"Wow, that's hardly bearable." You put a piece of popcorn between your teeth and wash it down with a gulp of wine. 
Charles, who has slid down a little further on the couch, looks at you. "Lightning or the whole movie?" He reaches for his glass on the table. 
You spread your index finger from the glass and point it at the screen. "Lightning. That was so slimy. Like anyone would fall for that." As Sally embarrasses the hell out of the red speedster, you thrust your fist into the air enthusiastically. 
Charles laughs. "So you're not into that sort of thing to seduce you?" He sips his wine, you shake your head. He props himself up on the seat with one elbow, resting his head in his hand, and stretches his legs out in your direction so that he's almost completely on the couch. He dangles the wine glass casually in his free hand. The film pauses. "How else can you be seduced?"
If you hadn't caught the phone call this lunchtime and the conversation with Joris, both of which involved a woman, you might think that Charles is flirting with you. That maybe he sees more in you than his roommate and friend. And if your ex-boyfriend hadn't spoiled your mood before - or generally not crossed your life - you'd go for it, too. 
You glance at Charles. He has taken off his jumper sometime after the second glass of wine and thrown it towards the dining table chair, so that he is lying next to you in his shirt. The strands of his hair stand on end after running his hand through them several times and his cheeks are slightly flushed. His green and otherwise alert eyes seem a little misty, almost certainly due to the alcohol. 
And his smile. God, his smile is so crooked and beautiful and his dimples give him something childishly cheeky that makes your heart beat a beat faster. 
Is he cute?, you hear Vicky's voice in the back of your mind. 
Damn cute, even. 
'Definitely not like that,' you finally answer his question, lowering your gaze towards your wine glass. If your mind is already drifting like this, maybe you should stop drinking. 
"How then?", Charles asks, his eyes fixed on you. 
Unsure, you look at him. "Why do you want to know?" Inwardly, you command your heart to give it a rest. Just because he asks doesn't mean he needs the knowledge for himself.
"Well, maybe one day a guy will come along who doesn't know how to approach you. And then I can give him a hint, if you want," he explains with a shrug, before taking a big sip of his wine and emptying his glass. 
You try not to let on how much his answer hits you. Somehow you hoped he would want to know that for himself, in case he decided to approach you at some point. But apparently you haven't been listening to Charles properly for the last few hours. 
That's what friends are for, after all. 
You're my friend. 
For not being a good friend to you. 
And friends who live together fight in between. 
Inwardly you slap your forehead with your palm. The wine is definitely to blame for your thoughts. 
"When you remember little things," you finally answer Charles' question and set your glass down on the table, which Charles seems to take as an invitation to top up, and before you can do anything about it he has refilled your glass. 
"Little things?" Charles lies back in his comfortable position and eyes you. 
You nod. "Yes. Like the fact that I think peonies are much prettier than roses, or that I prefer muffins to cupcakes. Little things like that, that define me." You shrug. "It just shows that the person has been paying attention and cared about me."
Charles nods, and you think he glances briefly at your almost empty wine bottle before reaching for the remote again. "Good to know."
The film continues and you decide that little blue Guido is your favourite character. As Lightning McQueen pulls yellow Betsy across the road and chats to Luigi and Guido, you raise your eyebrows in surprise. 
"Kind of strange to hear Formula One mentioned."
You notice Charles stiffen beside you, but his gaze remains forward. "Why?"
You reach - despite your brain vehemently telling you not to - for your glass. "Well, it's an animated film and the fact that Formula One is mentioned makes it kind of real. Although it's not. You know what I mean?"
"Do you watch Formula One, then?" asks Charles a counter-question, without answering yours. By now he is looking at you, but you can't interpret the expression on his face.
As you shake your head, he seems to relax a little. For whatever reason. "No. I used to watch it with my grandfather. Back when Michael Schumacher drove for Ferrari. We watched every race and cheered for the red team." You take a sip. "I lost sight of it at some point."
"Do you think you'd still be a Ferrari fan now if you'd stuck with it?" your roommate asks. Why he's so interested in it, you don't know. 
You point to the two Ferrari fans from Cars and smile. "Isn't everyone a Ferrari fan somehow? Even if they're not?" You turn back to the film and continue sipping your wine. 
Which is definitely not the best idea, because it seems to cloud your thoughts and loosen your mouth, because when Lightning decides to help Radiator Springs, it just bursts out of you. "Lightning is hot."
Charles, who has just taken a sip, chokes and nearly coughs his guts out. When he has calmed down, he looks at you, distraught. "Excuse me?"
"Yeeeees." You turn a little in his direction and pull your legs to your chest. You're sitting opposite each other now, except that Charles is lying down. "Not so 'wow, I'd like to fuck him'-hot. But his vibe makes him hot."
Charles wiggles his eyebrows. "I was once told I looked like him."
You have to laugh out loud, and you reach into the popcorn bowl once and throw it at him, laughing. He's not that quick to open his mouth to catch the pieces, but he gathers them up off his shirt and puts them between his teeth, grinning. 
"Why are you laughing like that? Someone actually said that once! Don't you believe me?"
You realise that the wine has gone to your head, because you can hardly stop laughing. You can hardly breathe and tears spring to your eyes, which you wipe away with the hem of your jumper. Your stomach hurts and you force yourself to breathe in and out deeply. "No, I believe you. But Lightning is just hot, and you're cute. There's a difference between the two."
Your sober self, which is napping somewhere deep in your brain, startles from its slumber and would love to slap you for it. 
Charles cheeks turn even redder and somehow the hem of his shirt seems very interesting because he rubs it between his thumb and forefinger before looking at you. "So you think I'm cute?"
This time he is quicker and catches the piece of popcorn you throw in his direction with his mouth and chews on it with relish. "Oh, come on. I'm definitely not the first one to say that to you," you try to somehow talk your way out of it. "I'm probably just the first to say that without flirting with you. My statement is to be considered purely objective."
"Objective, then?" He sits up a little straighter. "What would it look like if you were flirting?"
You put your wine glass down on the table and decide to actually let it go for today. You've definitely said too much, which you'd almost certainly regret tomorrow, and just thinking about how weird things might get in the morning makes your blood rush to your ears. So you reach for the popcorn. "I'm not doing that to you."
Your roommate raises an eyebrow in confusion. "Why? Are you that bad?" he quips.
You shake your head playfully. "On the contrary. I'm so good at it, you'd fall in love with me instantly," you joke, and have to grin, but Charles doesn't return it. 
"Don't worry," he replies without taking his eyes off you. "It takes more than that to make me fall head over heels in love with someone."
You'd love to ask what exactly it takes, but why should you care? You're friends, he's made that clear. And you should definitely get it through your head. In your drunken estimation, the line of friendship you're walking right now is clearly too narrow for your liking. 
You purse your lips and watch the film in silence. The mood has changed, no longer as easy-going as it was a few minutes ago. You would like to say something, but you don't know what, so you sit still. 
When you reach the point in the film where Lightning pushes the King across the finish line - against your expectations - to finish third in the Piston Cup, you can't stop the sob that leaves your mouth. Out of the corner of your eye you see Charles looking at you. And then all the dams break.
"How can a film about cars - about cars, Charles - make me cry like this?" You wipe away your tears. "This isn't normal. What's the point? It's a movie for kids, for fuck's sake."
Charles' smile is gentle. "No swear words, please. The film is my favourite."
"The film is first class." You try to breathe but hiccup as a result and Charles has to laugh slightly. "Oh, shit. Do kids even understand how important the message is? That it doesn't matter if you win or not as long as you do the right thing and have your friends around you?" 
"There are two more parts, by the way. We can watch those too if you like," Charles suggests and he looks a little offended when you shake your head and get up from the couch. 
"Let me process this movie first and then we'll see." You grab the empty wine bottles and glasses to take them to the kitchen. Charles grabs the bowls and you put the dishes in the sink. Neither of you would manage to wash them properly yet and with a single glance you silently agree to clean up the rest of the living room in the morning. 
You go together to the bathroom where you get ready for bed. You are brushing your teeth when your gaze catches his in the mirror. You smile at him. "But I would love to watch the films with you. I had a lovely evening, if that wasn't clear." You spit some excess foam into the sink. "Thank you for that."
Charles sticks his thumb in the air and washes his mouth out before answering you. "Anytime." He places his toothbrush in his cup. "I haven't had this much fun watching a movie in ages." As he looks at you, his gaze goes through your skin and bones. "Thank you for forgiving me. I couldn't bear it if you were angry with me."
As he combs his hair with a brush - yours - you rinse out your mouth as well. It's so mundane the way the two of you get ready for bed next to each other, as if you've grown up together and not as if you've only known each other for exactly one day. This familiarity between you should feel strange, but you have to admit yourself that nothing has ever felt better. 
"I don't think I can stay mad at you for long." You tie your hair into a braided pigtail, which takes a little longer than usual because of the wine. "I like you far too much for that."
You don't wait for his answer, but leave the bathroom, grabbing your camera and phone for a moment. "Do you have your AirDrop on?" you ask him. "So I can send you the photo."
"Oh, yeah. Hang on a sec." He rummages around among the cushions on the couch for a moment until he pulls out his phone and taps away on it. You look at your screen, and see "CL iPhone" flashing up. You press his name and the picture your camera automatically sent to the phone app is now sent to Charles. He looks at it for a moment. "I look so good."
"Don't get too carried away," you laugh and move towards the bedroom door while Charles gets his bedding from the wardrobe in the hall. You watch him for a moment as he gets his things ready. "Good night, Lightning."
His smile is so gentle you could melt. "Good night."
After closing the bedroom door behind you, you slip into your sleeping clothes and climb under your duvet. With your phone in your hand, you lie down on your side. You release the key lock and Charles' picture appears. 
He is right. He does look good in it. 
Just as you are about to plug your phone into the charger and put it away, a message pops up on the screen. 
CL iPhone would like to share a photo
Surprised, you click on "Accept". 
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You giggle and think about sending a picture back, but don't. "You can sleep in your bed tomorrow," you shout across the flat and receive a "Thank you!"
Grinning, you snuggle into your pillow and force yourself not to stare at the picture he just sent you. It's almost cheeky how he can still look so good after such a long day and a bottle of wine. 
You put your phone next to your pillow and turn onto your back. To cope with this situation, you have to draw clearer lines. And lock away the thoughts that are running around in your head in between. 
You have a crazy ex. And there's something going on with Charles too, although you don't know what exactly. It definitely wouldn't be the right time for either of you to develop feelings for someone. And as often as he's referred to you as his friend, you want to spare yourself the shame of falling for someone who doesn't want you. 
You put your forearms over your face. 
You have known each other for twenty-four hours. How can someone be so etched in your mind after such a short time? 
You blame your emotional state on the wine, close your eyes and try to think of something else. Of cute penguins, puppies, sheep. But the thoughts circle and circle and always find their way back, as if they only know this way. 
Always back to Charles. Charles. Charles. Charles.
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Text
Guilty as Sin? — Chapter Five
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pairing: professor!javier peña x f!reader
rating: series is 18+ only, minors DNI, professor/student dynamic, oral (fem!rec), mutual masturbation, lots of ogling, romantic Javi will be the death of me, dirty talk, little bit of angst thrown in, reader's never experienced oral, think that's it for now
word count: 4k
series masterlist
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You didn’t attend Dr. Peña’s office hours that day, too exhausted by your crumbling social life to deal with whatever it was he wanted to talk about with you in private. Instead, you spent the night grocery shopping, decorating your new place, and getting a jump start on Dr. Arman’s research paper due in a few weeks. 
By the time you were in bed and began to mindlessly scroll on your phone, it was nearing midnight. As you scrolled through pinterest finding sad quote after sad quote to make your sadness feel a little less isolating, an email notification lit up your screen. You clicked on it, finding a message from Dr. Peña.
Please set up an appointment with me to discuss your grade. 
Dr. Javier Peña
555-268-8521
You narrowed your brows at the message—what was he talking about? You quickly opened the online portal to check your grade, finding it in near-perfect standing. Flipping back to the email, you read it over again before locking eyes on his phone number, bolded in bright red. Chuckling at his use of coded messaging, you copied the number and added it to your contacts as Javier just in case someone decided to snoop around. 
Biting your lip, you let your fingers hover over your keyboard, unsure of what to say, or if he even wanted you to message him. But he had to, right? No one highlighted shit in red if they didn’t mean to draw attention. 
You settled on something simple, something that couldn’t possibly be misconstrued if an outside party were to see it. 
You: Hey, it’s…
You: You emailed about setting up an appointment?
You waited what felt like a lifetime, choosing to spend those torturous minutes anxiously scrolling through your feed until your phone buzzed with an alert. 
Javier: So formal. 
You rolled your eyes. 
Javier: Why didn’t you show up today?
You: Too tired.
Javier: You still tired? 
You bit your lip as his words sent a thrilling ache between your thighs. 
You: Depends.  
Javier responded only with an address, one that looked to be attached to an apartment complex in the nice part of town. With your heart racing with excitement and head screaming with caution, you decided that you’d earned a bit of recklessness. You’d done everything you needed to do today, so why not do something you wanted to do?
You thanked the skies for convincing you to pamper yourself earlier with an everything shower as you slipped into a much less comfy pair of underwear, choosing to keep your hoodie and leggings on rather than dressing to impress. After all, there was a good chance your hopes would come crashing down if he truly only meant to talk. 
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The drive to his place was spent singing along to your favorite album, hoping to drown out the alarm sounds in your head that seemed to scream, idiot!
You pulled into the gated complex, punching in the code he’d sent to you before making your way through the gates. You parked your beat up car in a visitor spot, headlights illuminating a man smoking a cigarette in that black leather jacket you could still feel wrapped around your shoulders. Javier. 
He watched you as you climbed out of the car, hands trembling with nerves. 
“Hey,” you breathed, giving him a nervous smile. Javier’s smile was a lot more confident, causing a dimple to form in his left cheek. 
“Hey,” he replied, ashing out the cigarette on the trash can beside him before approaching you. “You look cozy. Hope I didn’t wake you.”
“Should I take that as an insult?” you joked. 
“No,” he assured, his smile softening to something so affectionate it made your heart race. “I like you like this.”
You flushed, dropping your eyes to the pavement beneath your feet. Javier surprised you by lifting his hand to your chin, gently guiding your eyes back to his. “This isn’t a good idea,” he husked, eyes bouncing back and forth between yours. “But fuck me, I can’t stop thinking about you.” 
Your lips parted as he stepped closer, his hand shifting to cradle your cheek, his thumb stroking across your skin. 
“But first, I wanted to introduce you to someone,” he said, letting his hand fall to his side. Tipping his head in the direction of the lobby, he urged you to follow him. 
Who the fuck did he possibly want to introduce you to? His secret family?
Javier opened the door with a smug look, furthering your confusion until the old woman—who looked around the age of seventy—behind the front desk popped up with a smile. 
“I didn’t see you sneak out, Javi,” she smiled, batting her eyes at him. “You got a secret exit I don’t know about, honey?”
“It wouldn’t be a secret if I told you, Jeannie, now would it be?” he crooned, turning to you. “This was the friend of mine I wanted to introduce you to. She’s run the complex for how long now, Jeannie?”
“Thirty years,” she replied, both pride and exhaustion in her tone. “Thirty years and no goddamn retirement in sight.”
You gaped at Javier, his brow raising and smirk spreading into a full on dimpled-grin. Quickly turning to Jeannie, you chuckled and shook your head at yourself. 
“It’s nice to meet you, Jeannie,” you smiled, giving her your name. 
“You too, sweetie,” she said. “Y’all have a good night. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”
“That’s not saying much, Jeannie,” Javier teased, resting his hand on your back as he guided you to the elevator. 
You kept quiet until you were inside the privacy of those four walls. “So you finally figured it out.”
“Well, I figured it out when you slammed my car door on me,” he chuckled, standing close enough for you to smell his cologne. You stepped closer to that scent of warmth and comfort, brushing your arm against his. “Thought I’d clear the air this way since you stood me up earlier.”
“I didn’t stand you up,” you laughed. “I just…I don’t know. Needed some time away from everything.”
He hummed his response, waiting for the bell to chime, signaling your arrival to the third floor, before leading you out and down the hall to his apartment. As he put his key in the lock, he turned to you with a half-smile. “You sure you want this?”
“Depends on what this is,” you replied. Javier smiled, shaking his head before opening the door to his place. He let you walk in ahead of him, the door shutting and locking behind him. 
“This is…I don’t know,” he sighed, though it sounded less like frustration but more along the lines of hesitant acceptance. “Me throwing caution to the wind, I guess.”
“Just you?” you asked, turning away from the black and brown abstract painting on the wall of his living room to look at him over your shoulder. He looked at you with such unabashed desire as he carefully stepped into your space until his chest was nearly pressed against your back. 
“Us, then,” he whispered, slowly dragging his fingertips up the length of your arm, causing goosebumps to form on your skin. Your breath hitched as he leaned in to brush his lips against the shell of your ear. “Do you know how much space in my mind you’ve taken up? Without doing anything more than existing.” 
You turned to face him, your hands settling on his chest before sliding up to the nape of his neck. Javier’s brow furrowed as he watched you study his features, committing each one to memory in case tonight was all you’d ever have with him. “Only seems fair that I’m on your mind as much as you’re on mine.”
Javier groaned softly, his hands finding your hips as he walked you backwards, sandwiching you between his body and the back of his sectional. 
“Can I kiss you?” he asked, licking his lips as his eyes fell to yours. “These fucking lips that’ve been calling my name since the first time I saw you.”
You let out a soft breath, nodding your head quickly, as if he’d change his mind if you didn’t reply quick enough. Javier smiled, something fleeting and rooted in affection before crashing his lips against yours. You moaned at the taste of cinnamon blended with a hint of the cigarette he’d been smoking when you pulled into the parking lot. 
What started out as cautious quickly turned into something needy, his hands gripping your hips to pull you closer to his frame. You gasped into his mouth as he pressed his generous arousal against you, your center aching to feel him without the layers between you. 
“Javi,” you panted out the nickname, relishing in the groan it elicited. Javier was quick to pull away, his dark eyes lust blown and wild as he lifted a hand to your face. 
“What do you want, cariño?” he rasped, smoothing his thumb over your bottom lip as though to worship it. “Hm?”
It took you a few seconds to register what he’d said, your mind preoccupied with fantasy after fantasy that finally felt possible. 
“You,” you replied, soft and breathy. “Your lips, your tongue, your fingers, your…”
“My what?” he coaxed, a smirk tugging at his lips. 
Lowering your hand down his chest and stomach, you let your palm rest against his arousal, giving him a gentle squeeze that made him curse. “This. This is what I want.” 
“Fuck me,” he swore, taking a step away from you before entering a pace. He raked his hand across his face as he seemed to mull things over, meanwhile you were left standing there, panting like an idiot while replaying the interaction in your head. 
Was it your touch that spooked him? Oh god, did he not want to be touched? Perhaps you were no better than Derrick, so blinded by desire and longing that you acted before asking. 
“Javi, I—“
“If we do this,” he started, stilling his pacing to give you a stern look. “It’s a one time thing. You and I will go about our lives as normal. You can continue to TA for me if you want, or I can try to transfer you to another professor.”
“I don’t want that,” you blurted, too lost in lust to think clearly. “One time. Get it out of our systems.”
Javier chuckled, as if he had foresight into how this all played out. He could’ve seen a happy ending, the two of you reminiscing on this very moment, laughing at the idiots you once were to ever think for a minute it would only be a one time thing. Or, more realistically, he imagined the two of you awkwardly dealing with the existence of the other with forced greetings and a hidden longing that felt more like a haunting. 
Whatever scene he saw, it didn’t prevent him from sauntering back to you, from kissing you like a sailor greeting his wife after being away at sea for years, from guiding you into his bedroom, and you didn’t dare break the magic of the moment by asking.
Javier backed you against the wall, his thigh slotting between yours. His lips traveled the line of your neck, teeth grazing across your racing pulse only to soothe over the tender flesh with his tongue. 
“If you knew the things I’ve imagined…” His words trailed off into a dark chuckle as his hands slid up your side to cup your breast through your shirt. He groaned at the lack of a bra, his hips pressing into yours as he swiped his thumb across your peaked nipple. “You proud that you’ve broken a good, honorable man? That the sight of you in those fucking skirts made me insane enough to consider fucking you right on my desk?”
“Sort of,” you admitted, earning a genuine laugh. You smiled at him as he pulled back, lifting his hand to hold your face. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
The way he looked at you almost made your heart stop. You’d never been looked at like that before, with respect, affection, and genuine interest. It had only been lust before this, or worse, pity. The girl who stayed loyal, who allowed a man to walk all over her for years on end. 
“Just admiring,” he shrugged, giving you a casual purse of his lips. “Clever, brave, resilient, and so fucking beautiful it hurts.”
You couldn’t take hearing anything that sincere from him, not when it was all you ever wanted to hear, not when you knew it would all be over tomorrow. You tugged him back in for a kiss, hastily shedding his jacket in the process. Javier moaned into your mouth, pressing you against the wall with one arm wrapped around your waist and the other hoisting your thigh over his hip. 
You moved on to the buttons of his shirt as he mouthed his way down your neck to your chest, his greedy hands palming every soft bit of flesh he could find. 
“Take this off,” you demanded, your fingers too shaky to unfasten the buttons. Javier pulled away from you to do just that, his chin nudging at you as if to say, you too. You peeled off your hoodie, earning a groan from Javier as he unbuckled his belt, his eyes eating up the sight of your bare breasts. “Fuck me, you’d turn Christ himself into a sinner.”
You ignored the butterflies his praises stirred in your belly as you peeled off your leggings and underwear in one fluid motion, leaving you completely bare—and for once in your life, confident—in front of him. Javier abandoned undoing the button of his jeans in favor for coming back to you, both hands cradling your face as he backed you against the wall again. 
“One night,” he muttered, seemingly to himself. “We’ll fucking see.”
You slid your hand down his stomach to the button of his jeans, undoing it with only a little bit of trouble. Javier’s lips never left yours as you tugged the zipper down before slipping your hand inside. You both moaned at the feeling of your hand meeting his bare flesh, swallowing down the sounds of mutual pleasure. 
God, he was big. Bigger than anyone you’d ever been with before. 
“You’re going to ruin me for all men,” you purred into the air as he focused his lips, teeth, and tongue on your pulse again, your hand slowly pumping his shaft as best as you could given the way his body was pressing you into the wall. 
“I’ve always been an overachiever,” he replied, his smirk growing against your skin as he placed one last soft kiss against your pulse before kneeling down in front of you. You kept your eyes locked on his as he guided your calf to rest over his shoulder, his lips pressing their way up the inside of your leg. 
This was better than your favorite fantasy. It hadn’t managed to get the brown of his eyes, the rough warmth of his hands, the sinful scrape of his mustache across your soft skin right. In fact, now that you were witness to the real thing, the fantasy seemed like nothing more than a cheap knock-off.
“Javi,” you cautioned, remembering one critical detail about the fantasy. The fact that you’d never actually had this done to you before. All the sex and sin you’d gotten up to in your life, but never this. Selfish fucking men. 
“What,” he hummed lazily against your skin, now kissing your inner thigh. 
“You don’t have to,” you replied, nothing more than a whisper. Javier shook his head at you, gently nipping at your sensitive flesh. 
“Don’t have to, but fuck me, I want to,” he rasped, lathing his tongue over where he’d just given you a lovebite. You gently raked your hand through his hair, bringing his eyes away from your aching center and back to yours. 
“I’ve had this exact fantasy since the first day of class,” you admitted, biting your lip. “It’s been my favorite thing to think about when I touch myself.”
Javier groaned, desperate and wrecked. 
“Can you make it as good as my fantasy?” you asked, your voice a seductive purr. 
There was something about this—Javier on his knees, practically begging to taste you—that felt so much more empowering than you’d ever felt before with a sexual partner. How you’d ever go back to more age appropriate men, you weren’t sure. 
“You’re…” He cut himself off, shaking his head before leaning closer to where you practically dripped with need. “I’ll give you something real to fantasize about when you touch yourself, cariño.”
You smiled at the promise, only for it to fall as your jaw went slack at the feeling of Javier’s tongue licking a broad stripe up your seam. You furrowed your brows as you looked down to watch him, his eyes closed as he tugged you closer to his mouth. His tongue swirled around your bud, over and over, making you pulse with each passing swirl. You gripped onto his hair to keep him there, guiding him as his tongue dipped lower to your entrance to drink up your arousal with a sinful groan. 
“So fucking sweet,” he praised, pulling back to marvel at your swollen pussy with a look of awe. “I need you on the bed.” 
You nodded, springing into action and practically leaping into his king-sized mattress. You crawled back on your elbows until you reached the pillows, watching as Javier finally kicked off his jeans, finally taking in the full sight of his cock. You actually began to salivate at the sight of him, long and thick and angry with need. 
He stood at the edge of the bed, eyes locked on you as he stroked himself with his fist. You slipped your hand down to your clit, rubbing it in time with his lazy strokes, and quickly realized you could get off from this alone. 
“That’s it,” he husked. “Show me how you touch yourself when you think of me.”
You moaned, slipping your fingers lower to curl inside yourself. There was something so holy about this sinful act. The way he watched you, the worship and reverence in his stare as you got off to the sight of him getting off to the sight of you. All of it was holy, and all of it was forbidden. 
“Good fucking girl,” he praised, the words causing you to pulse around your fingers. 
Javier seemed to have gotten his fill of watching as he climbed onto the bed, making himself at home between your thighs. You slipped your fingers out and moved to law them to the side, but he stopped you, bringing them to his lips to suck them clean while you watched him with a slack jaw. 
“Fuck,” you moaned, brows pinching together. Javier kissed the inside of your palm before setting it down against his cool sheets. 
“Is this how you imagined it?” he asked, kissing your inner thigh. 
“Mmhm,” you hummed, combing back the waves that had fallen across his forehead. Javier keened under your touch as he inched his way back to your center. Locking his eyes with yours, you watched him turn your fantasies into reality—those brown eyes finally meeting yours just as you’d imagined. 
“You taste so good,” he praised, bringing two fingers up to stroke up and down your seam before dipping into your entrance. He met your eyes in a silent confirmation of consent. You nodded eagerly, biting your lip as you tried to steady your breathing. 
Javier let out a soft sigh as he slipped his fingers inside of you, curling them up to press against the spot no man had ever been able to locate before. You moaned, your head falling back against his pillows as he paired his tongue with the perfectly timed thrust of his fingers. 
“Fuck,” you whined, holding him close as he started to suck on your swollen bud, his fingers curling in and out with almost embarrassing ease as you neared your end—the first one you’d ever shared with a sexual partner. “Javi, fuck. You’re gonna make me come.”
He moaned, the sound vibrating against you as he doubled down in his efforts. Your thighs shook, your face crumpled in ecstasy as the thread of tension inside you finally snapped. Javier kept your thighs spread as they threatened to close around his head, his tongue turning gentle as he coaxed you back to earth. 
“That’s the first time someone’s ever made me come,” you panted, guiding him up for a dizzying kiss that tasted of your arousal. Javier’s hands gripped at your hip, guiding your leg to wrap around his waist. 
“Fucking idiots,” he sighed, pressing a kiss over your racing heartbeat. “Their loss.”
You nodded in agreement, your hand cradling the sharp line of his jaw as he focused his mouth on your breast. “I’d…be down for another.”
He laughed, resting his head on your chest. 
“As much as I want to, I think maybe it would be best if we just…didn’t,” he said, lifting his head to look into your eyes. You tried not to pout, to demand that he take as much as he just gave, but all you could do was give him a soft nod. “I want to, believe me. But it would just—“
“Make things more complicated,” you guessed, unable to look him in the eye. “I know.”
He tutted at you, turning your chin so that you were forced to face him. “I loved tonight, loved doing this with you. Under any other circumstance, I’d be happy to keep you in this bed for days, but—“
“It’s okay,” you managed, giving him a sad smile. “I’m glad we had this, at least.”
He nodded, resting his head against your chest again.
“I should go,” you said, the lump in your throat roughening the sound of your voice. 
“You don’t have to,” he replied, placing a tender kiss to your chest. 
“I know, but…it’s torture staying,” you confessed, trying your best not to cry. “Like flaunting food in front of someone starving.”
Javier sat back on his knees, smoothing his palms up and down your still-spread thighs. “I’m not…trying to torture you.”
“I know,” you whispered. “Still, it’s…”
“Yeah,” he agreed on the unspoken. “It is.”
You let out a huff of a chuckle, hoping it would mask the ache in your chest threatening to consume you. “Guess I’ll see you in class, then?”
“Front and center, I hope,” he smiled, backing off the bed to give you space to get up and get dressed. “And no skirts, for Christ’s sake.”
“Mm, suddenly skirts are all I own,” you joked, shooting him a more genuine smile from over your shoulder as you slipped into your leggings. 
“Cruel woman,” he chided playfully, watching you from his seat at the foot of the bed. “Cruel, beautiful woman.”
After Javier led you out of the building through the back exit to avoid Jeannie, you bid him an awkward farewell, holding in your tears until you were in your car. You spent the commute from his place to yours sobbing over a man you could never have, one that was everything you ever wanted. You made a pit stop at a gas station to buy some comfort snacks and an ice-ee in hopes of soothing the ache in your chest, but the truth was there was no escaping the impact of Javier Peña on your soft, longing heart. 
You only hoped the recovery would be quick, the wound of losing him before you ever had him fading into an almost unnoticeable scar on your heart. 
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mitch-the-silly · 2 months
Note
VOX PART 2 AAAAAAA
Alright y'all, I locked in today, so it's time to get fed! Flock around!
Vox x fem!reader
Angst!!!
"Can't Seem to Hold Me, Can't Seem to Let Him Go" Pt.2
Part 1
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The moving truck pulled up to the V-Tower’s parking, you hugged your torso as you saw them go inside your shared room with Vox. You were taking your dresser and your clothes, your nightstand and your lamp. You were done with this. He’d refuted you and put you at the bottom of his priority list. It was despicable and you hated the very notion of him right now. After all the time you two spent together…  
You wiped a few tears off your face as you called a Taxi driving off to your new apartment. Vox wasn’t watching you right now, he was sure to be watching Alastor. So you fled to your newly acquired studio apartment. The only thing in the small living space was your mattress, the fridge, and the stove. It looked quite barren, but it was a start. You knew you meant nothing to Vox at this point, so despite the cramped space you were to live in now, distancing yourself from him was going to be a new beginning for you. A chapter of your life in which you didn’t depend on Vox. And while it may hurt you now, you knew that it would eventually fade… right?
However, your departure from the V-Tower wasn’t quite unnoticed. Despite Alastor occupying most of his attention, there came a time in which Vox HAD to sleep. Thus prompting him to go to his room. Of course, he expected you to be there. Yeah, he’d yelled at you today, but you couldn’t be too mad. Nothing an apology couldn’t fix. 
He opened the door to your shared bungalow suite, calling out to you nonchalantly, “Hey babe, I’m done with work for today. You want to… watch a movie or something, I don’t know.” He shrugged walking into the suite bedroom. The second he opened the door, he paused. 
Some furniture was missing. Your nightstand was gone and a painting he’d bought you for your birthday was taken off the wall too, nowhere to be seen. This could not be. What the hell happened to you? He ran towards your closet; it was empty. 
Fuck.
You weren’t kidnapped or anything, you left willingly. 
No no no no. Not now. Not now. This wasn’t possible. The only person who so adoringly loved him was gone. At the cusp of his rivalry with Alastor. The love and validation he solely craved, the very little he had… no, the abundance he had which he was absolutely oblivious to. 
What had he done to make her THIS mad at him?
Fuck… That thing she asked him… She’d asked him if she was important to him and instead of replying to her properly… no, why had he done that? Well… he knew why. Alastor. He wasn’t really ready (and shit, he might never be) to truly delve into why Alastor made him too erratic aside from the obvious rivalry. 
Regardless of all of this, he couldn’t stand the thought of having driven you away. He took the first object he saw and slammed it into the wall. He didn’t know what it was he’d picked up until he heard the shattering of ceramic. It was a mug you’d picked out for him. He’d left it on his nightstand the night before after drinking a cup of tea. He looked down at it, the little red letters on the now shattered navy blue mug made his livid expression rapidly morph into a self-loathing frown.
He had to find her. Now. 
He zapped out of the room, checking cameras, asking around, stopping every sinner in his building for information. And, desperate for an answer, he even recurred to his fellow Vees. First asking Velvette, who somehow had no answer to give him.
Last resort: Valentino. Vox was more than hesitant to ask Valentino of all people about your whereabouts because if he knew he wouldn’t tell him and of course, if he didn’t he obviously would have nothing today, but Vox wasn’t going to pass up a possible lead on finding you. So he stormed into Valetino’s tower, slamming the door open, not even waiting for the girls at his door to open it for him. Upon doing this, Vox was met with an annoyed, nasty look from Valentino.
“The fuck, Vox? What’s up your ass today?... Because it could be me but your little girlfriend wouldn’t like that, obviously.” Val sighed, rolling his eyes. He was watching something on his TV, not wanting to look away because of how invested he was in it (or maybe because he already couldn’t see the screen, so he had to work extra hard to even know who was talking to whom). 
“Real funny Val; where is she? Have you seen her?” Vox asked, ignoring his vulgar comment, hoping to seem like he still had some sort of composure. 
“Oh, she’s not in your bed right now? Are you really here looking for the little slut?” Valentino chuckled, turning towards him.
“D̵o̴n̶'̸t̶ ̵y̴o̴u̷ ̸f̵u̵c̴k̶i̵n̶g̴ ̶c̴a̴l̶l̵ ̶h̸e̵r̶ ̴t̴h̷a̴t̸,̶ ̴I̵'̶m̸ ̵n̷o̴t̶ ̷i̷n̴ ̶t̸h̸e̵ ̵d̵a̶m̴n̷ ̷m̶o̸o̵d̶.” Vox spat back, his patience waning quickly and his voice crackling in annoyance. 
Valentino scrunched up his face in offense, “Shit, fine! Ugh… last I saw her, she got in a Taxi. I thought she had some errand to run. Now get the fuck out of here, you’re killing my fucking vibe.” Valentino huffed, turning back to his program.
Vox wasted no time zapping out of the tower, as Valentino called out, “Have fun chasing your bitch!” Much to his benefit, Vox was already gone when he said this.
He zapped from camera to camera, looking through each for a millisecond. He had millions of cameras and he had to move fast. And this he did! Eventually catching a glimpse of a feature that identified you. He remained there in front of the camera where he’d last seen you. However, unluckily for him, the camera was in a hallway and he had no access to the room behind those doors.
He knocked on the door gently, adjusting his collar and manifesting a bouquet of flowers into exitance and into his hands. He gave the closed door his widest smile, hoping to do the same to your face.
“Coming!” You called out from the other side of the door, unaware of who was behind it. You would be privy to who was knocking on your door, however, the second you looked into the peephole. 
You opened the door, looking Vox up and down, “There is no fucking way in Hell.” You scoffed.
“Babe… hey…” He mumbled, his smile weakening a bit.
“Yeah no, drop the bit. Get the fuck out of here, my place in your priority list was left very clear this morning. You don’t even deserve a breakup text, go away.” You huffed, turning around and attempting to close the door behind you. However, the attempt failed due to Vox sticking his foot between the doorframe and the door itself. 
“Sweetheart, come on! I’m sorry! It wasn’t that big of a deal, let’s just-”
“It wasn’t that big of a deal!? VOX. I asked you if I was important to you and you replied with ‘Alastor is more important.’!” You yelled at him, outraged at his comment.
“Actually, I said ‘Alastor is important to me right now.’ ” Vox corrected, which did not really help his case.
“Are you fucking serious right now?! That’s pretty much the same thing?! Who the fuck responds to that question with that sort of answer!?” You spat back.
“Come onnnn! You can’t hate me that much over it, I didn’t mean, I was just… busy…” Vox explained; a half-assed explanation in your opinion. 
“Vox, you little shit, you’ve been, ‘busy’ for months now! Too busy in fact that you missed MY FUCKING BIRTHDAY WEEKS AGO! And here I am like an idiot thinking, ‘Oh, he’s probably really stressed! Lemme hop off his dick and not get on him because he’s gonna feel bad.’ BUT NOOOO! APPARENTLY ALASTOR IS MORE FUCKING IMPORTANT TO YOU!” You cried out, tears welling up in your eyes as you hit him out of the pure frustration seeping out from you. 
Vox took the hits; he deserved them. How could he have forgotten? This is why you responded this way. “I’m so sorry baby… I… you’re not gonna believe me but I did genuinely forget about what days have passed…”
“Fuck if I care, you already fucked up.” You scoffed, rolling your eyes at him.
“NO BABE! Please… just… I can’t lose you, please, I fucked up, I’ll fix it! What do you want? I- I- have my wallet here, here’s my card! You can get whatever you want! It’s on me!” He insisted, one rejection away from physically groveling at your feet.
Rejection which you’d sure give him. “Are you trying to buy me back?!” You replied, stepping back away from him.
“No no no! That’s not it! I just- W-what else can I do? No no, what do you want me to do?” He asked, getting on his knees in front of you. Claws dug into the floor as he looked up at you in emotional agony.
“I want you to get the fuck out of here.” You spoke. Nice and simple.
“NO! Please! Baby! You gotta give me a chance! I’ll fix anything you ask me to! I’ll take you everywhere with me if you need me to! Please! I’ll treat you like the goddess you are! Just… don’t leave me… please…” He begged the flowers in his hand already disheveled and lacking petals. He seemed… genuinely afraid of receiving no as an answer to this question. It sort of pained you.
You looked back at him, hesitant to speak again, “Are you… are you lying to me?”
“Of course not! You name it, I’ll do it! I just… don't ask m why but I just can’t stand the thought of fucking losing you…” Vox replied, still begging on his knees for your return.
You groaned, giving him a look of pity, he… he was insecure… this was the version of him where you could see under all his masks… “Fine… I’ll go back. But just know that if you play some shit like this again I’m NOT taking you back. I don’t give a shit how hard you beg.” You replied, taking the bouquet of flowers from his hands. 
You looked at them, and despite them being all beat up, they were beautiful…
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queenimmadolla · 2 months
Note
eddie, "angel", and fluff
𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩
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  Eddie takes an aggressively long pull of the joint clasped between his fingers, dark brown eyes focused on where you occupy the other half of the couch. Your arms are folded over the arm, head using them as a makeshift pillow for the weed induced nap that came over you.
  It’s dusk, the trailer park bathed in the warm copper glow of the sun’s last few minutes. The streetlights are due to come on when it disappears. Until then, the park kids run rampant, eager to play before the dark sends them home.
  Crickets are already chirping, Cicadas and their annoying screams are reverberating from various parts of the park, all the sounds of an approaching summer night.
  The heat had been bearable today, a nice breeze sweeping through Hawkins and encouraging most of the Forest Hills residents to keep their doors and windows open so their homes could air out. 
  You’d slept over the night before, and with some languid kisses, Eddie had easily persuaded you to stay. You practically lived with him already, anyways. Had your products mingled with his on his dresser, your clothes in his closet and drawers and his pillows smelling of your shampoo and perfume. It felt wonderfully domestic and Eddie was hooked on the sensation. Loved having your presence all around him.
  With a summer day as nice as today, the two of you decided to wind down with some light reading and sharing a joint, some grapes, along with some water out on the porch couch. 
  Eddie was sitting on one end of the couch, while you were splayed out on the rest of it, bare feet resting on his lap. The two of you read your separate choices, enthralled in the last voyage of the dawn treader and a corpse, made from various beings, brought to life. 
  The soothing stroke of Eddie’s hands over the skin of your leg, coupled with the heat, breeze and weed had eventually lulled you into a slumber, with Eddie noticing only after he’d finished the chapter he was on. He entertained the idea of reading further, you just proved to be far more alluring than any structure of the English language. 
  Your face is a little shiny, obviously due to the weather, but it only makes you glow and your lips are pouty as a result of half your face being squished against your arm. You look so peaceful, so beautiful. His angel. 
  Eddie exhales the smoke he was holding in, head feeling even fuzzier than before. It’s nice.
  Despite popular belief, Eddie doesn’t get high often. Nothing against smoking, he’d just already gone through the phase of constantly being high and it lost its novelty. Been there, done that. 
  Now, he only really smokes with you, more so to relax and enjoy rather than to get high out of his fucking mind and unlock an ability to understand animals or some shit. No, Eddie just likes to use it as another way to bond with you.
  Eddie’s an affectionate person, he’s aware. He’d been starved for affection as a child after his mom died and his dad could barely clap him on the shoulder, he was doomed to crave it in his relationships. Always the Romantic in them, even if it left him the fool in the end.
  Despite many ends, he never stopped. Maybe he held back a little, but never fully stopped. Always wanting to tuck someone into his side, moon over them, map his kisses out over sweet smelling skin, and even sweeter tasting lips that would later scorn him with hurtful words when he inevitably proved to be too much or too little.
  Then you’d come into his life. You’d been present for a lot of it, a background character if you will. Sometimes sharing the same friends, sometimes exchanging pleasant greetings and maybe a short interaction. 
  Eddie thinks about one, in particular. He thinks about it a lot. 
  It had taken place at a nice little kickback with Harrington and co. Just a tight knit group of friends, some closer than others. Eddie had his then-girlfriend at his side, an arm slung over her shoulder as he conversed with your then-boyfriend, who you’d attended the event with. The conversation had been pleasant but lacking any genuine common interests or passion, until you spoke up, from your place in his arms, in defense of Michael Jackson’s discography.
  Eddie enjoyed all kinds of music, dabbled in it, and while he didn't despise Top 40 music, it did become repetitive so he didn’t listen to it often himself. 
  After that night, and a heated debate on whether or not songs being overplayed meant it took away from the brilliance of them—Eddie found himself ducking into the local music store to pick up a tape of Dangerous.
  That had been the first night he used weed for the sole purpose of enhancing an experience. It had also been the night he’d acknowledged his current relationship would not be ending with wedding bells, which granted he’d already known prior, but since it was you plaguing his mind that night (and every night after) and not her, he knew it’d have to end sooner rather than later—lest he wish to be the douche that longs for another instead of his girlfriend.
  Eddie’s hands trail along your skin, a little prickly from re-growing hair but that kind of turns him on. It’s definitely the weed hyping up his senses, your skin is so fucking soft and pliable. You’re always so delicious, he just wants to bite you.
  So, he does.
  You jolt awake with an Ow! and a laugh once you’d realize what had disturbed you from your nap. Eddie grins, barking out a laugh as you sit up and swat his arm. You don’t have to rub over the bite mark on your leg, Eddie’s already doing that for you before he yanks you by it even closer, until he’s pulling you onto his lap, lips searing against yours. He never has to hold back with you.
  You hum against his mouth, a hand moving to tangle in the curls at the nape of his neck and he sighs as he melts.
  Amongst the crickets and the cicadas, Eddie swears he can also hear wedding bells.
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benedictscanvas · 1 year
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be still, my foolish heart [1] - jamie tartt x reader
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pairing: jamie tartt x fem!reader
word count: 2.5k
series warnings: lots of language throughout, some allusions to smut but nothing explicit, a LOT of fucking fluff mostly ngl
a/n: eeeek i have been furiously writing this the last few days and now that a few chapters are done i'm desperate to share. chapters will be out regularly, every couple of days or so. really hope you lot enjoy this one, i'm so grateful for all the recent love <3
series summary: when jamie gets called up to the england team for the first time, he's terrified. enter you, all smiles and swearing, and suddenly his only fear is falling head over boots for you.
next chapter | series masterlist
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chapter one: to be alone with you
Jamie hadn’t found himself this nervous in quite a while. He’d been worried when he came back to Richmond of course - trying to prove to his team that he’d changed, that he was there for the right reasons, was a challenge. But he’d overcome it and now he had a family for the rest of his life. He thought very little could make him properly nervous anymore.
That was until he was sat in his childhood home, clutching his mum for dear life as they waited for the England team to be officially announced, refreshing the page over and over and over again on his phone. When it appeared at 2pm like clockwork and his eyes scanned the list of forwards only to find the name Jamie Tartt as clear as day, he was up in a moment, him and his mum screaming as they hugged each other and bounced around the room.
It had been the same at Richmond the next day, the congratulations coming thick and fast. He was overwhelmed and excited and eager to chat to every single person who’d listen to him about his dream coming true, but the nerves only kicked in when he was sat in a car with tinted windows a couple of weeks later, arriving at the training ground for his first ever training sessions, which would turn into his first ever England matches in just a few weeks time.
He didn’t know anyone here apart from a few Manchester City players who he had never said goodbye to, so he had no idea what they’d think of him. Sometimes, on a not-so-good day, his mind would wander to the idea of his old City mates laughing together about the shit he’d gotten up to the night before on Lust Conquers All. He hated thinking about it. He knew seeing their faces again would make him think about it more.
It had only been a few days but he missed Sam. Isaac and Colin and Beard and Ted and Keeley and Roy. Roy would have something so simultaneously horrible and inspiring to say to him right now. Richmond had become such a family, it was difficult to imagine playing football with anyone else.
“This is it, Mr Tartt,” the driver says, and that makes him feel even worse because Mr Tartt is his dad and he is not his dad. He hadn’t even realised they’d pulled into a car park.
“Just Jamie, yeah?” he says rather than running away as he gets out of the car. The man smiled, passed him the suitcase that had been sat in the boot of the car and drove off without a word. Now he was really alone.
He pulled his headphones from around his neck and placed them on his head, putting the playlist that the boys had curated for him back on. Ted had made everyone make a playlist for the boys on international duty over the summer, ‘somethin’ to remind you of home’, he’d said, and Jamie had honestly thought it was weird.
Now he was listening to ‘Adventure of a Lifetime’ by Coldplay, added to the playlist by none other than Ted himself, and he had to admit - it was catchy. And it reminded him of home.
He looked around for the entrance and spotted one other young man who he recognised from Liverpool making his way in at an entrance to his left, so he made a beeline for it.
He was just reaching the doors when a woman leaned into his eyeline just enough to catch his attention, just ahead of the doors. He was quick to tear the headphones from his head to avoid looking rude - it was his worst fear.
“Sorry, did ya say somethin’?” he asked, trying to wear a bright smile even if he knew it would come off a little worn. You appeared unphased, wearing a far brighter grin that he knew he could ever manage. It was warm; you were warm. And incredibly pretty, even though he was less keen on how quickly he noticed that.
“I tried to tell them that this whole thing would be a bit awkward when you had headphones on,” you said, and as he stepped closer to have a conversation, it was easier to notice that you were actually quite flustered, the bright grin masking some embarrassment, “I’m part of the PR team, we’re just doing some content for the Instagram. Ask the players what music they’re listening to when they walk in, people go crazy for it. If you’re trying to become the summer’s heartthrob, I recommend saying Taylor Swift.”
“They’re supposed to tell the truth!” a man beside you piped up, all nasal, but Jamie barely spared him a glance. He was still a little caught up in how pretty you really were the closer he got. You were very fucking pretty now that he was a couple of metres away, leaning on the handle of his suitcase. He scolded himself for even thinking about flirting with you.
You, now looking at the man who’d spoken as if you’d just remembered he was there. You cleared your throat.
“No, I know, sorry. I was just fucking with you,” you confirmed, turning back to Jamie, then wincing, “Playing with you, I mean. I swear I’m a very professional person and I don’t swear that much. At work.”
Jamie only realised a few moments into the silence that you were waiting for him to speak. He could feel the heat in his cheeks he had been desperate to keep at bay.
“I swear all the time,” he said, already kicking himself for how stupid that sounded, “Work or no work. Swear as much as you fuckin’ like.”
He can see at least a bit of your embarrassment leaking away, so maybe it hadn’t been such a stupid thing to say after all.
“I’ll keep that in mind,” you say, head tilted in a way Jamie can only describe as fuckin’ adorable. All too quickly, you seem to snap back into work mode, “Anyway, Brian’s right. The truth would be preferable, but if the truth is Taylor Swift, good for you! Any chance you’d be willing to walk backwards a bit, then pretend to do this again for the camera?”
You had the decency to look embarrassed, again, to be asking, but he was quite sure he’d do whatever you wanted him to with those wide, pleading eyes of yours. Just the little kindness you’d provided had washed away a lot of the deep-seated fear he’d been feeling just moments prior. He’d do what he could to repay the favour.
“Yeah, ‘course, whatever you need. Just walk up, pretend I hear your question with me headphones on and then…answer?”
“You’re a natural, Jamie Tartt,” you offer up, signalling who he assumed was Brian to raise his camera back up and get ready. He can’t help himself, just like with his driver, although this time he hopes he won’t get blanked.
“Just Jamie, eh? Less syllables, an’ that.”
You nod and almost look impressed, but he can’t imagine why.
“I’m almost sure Just Jamie is the same number of syllables as Jamie Tartt actually,” you argue, and he almost thinks you’re serious until you break out in that big, bright grin again and he feels like he’s 16, “Sorry. Fucking with you again. You can call me Just Y/N if you like.”
Y/N. Suits you, he thinks. Almost as much as that shade of blue does, all rich and Richmond-esque. He’s sure he’s got a team shirt somewhere that matches that exact colour.
“It’s nice meeting ya, Just Y/N,” he says, then realises how much he’s smiling and needs to do something about it, “And you, Brian. It’s great to be ‘ere, actually, just in general like.”
You nod, kind. Brian does a signal Jamie doesn’t understand, but he walks back a few paces anyway and puts his headphones back on. This time, when you step forward to stop him, he knows what you’ve asked without hearing it and takes his headphones off with a genuine smile at you.
“Oh, this?” he says, making sure he doesn’t smirk when you giggle behind the camera at his acting, “Whole Richmond gang made a playlist for us international lot. Ted, the gaffer, he put a lot of inspirational stuff, you know? Right now it’s Adventure of a Lifetime, the one by Coldplay.”
He’s not sure if he’s meant to say all that or just say the name of the song, and he’s ready to ask if he should start over before Brian signals that he’s cut the camera and you’re gaping at him.
“Okay, I know I put it in your head that you could lie, but you’re actually telling the truth, right?”
Brian scoffs. The prick within Jamie wishes Brian didn’t exist.
“That was worse than just saying Taylor Swift to impress girls,” he mutters, and you make a face that only Jamie sees. You don’t like Brian either and he already likes having something in common with you.
“I know you think that music went downhill after the 1960s, Brian, but no need to take it out on literally everyone who comes through here today. We’re meant to be a fun greeting crew! Why don’t you go get a snickers or something?”
Brian looked disgruntled throughout your speech until you suggested a snickers - clearly the way to the man’s heart. He was turning and speed-walking to the what Jamie assumed was the nearest vending machine in no time.
Now you were pretty and assertive. A deadly combination in Jamie’s eyes, particularly when paired with the fact that he was now pretty sure you were Brian’s boss. You were staring after Brian reproachfully, with a bit of that embarrassment back that Jamie was desperate to rid you of.
“Uh, it was true, by the way,” he says, rubbing the back of his neck, “I can go again if you don’t want me to say that much, or-“
“No! No no, that was-“ you shake your head in a disbelief he doesn’t understand, “Brian’s been like this forever. Please don’t take it personally. I’ve been trying not to all morning.”
“It’s okay, really,” he tries to reassure you, “He works for you?”
He can see the smirk that you try to hide. It’s endearing.
“No, not technically. I like that you think so, though,” you smile, a real one again, just as he’d hoped, “I don’t normally work with Brian, he’s usually a match cameraman, not so much PR. I was just a woman down today.”
Jamie leans in, all conspiratorial, because he simply cannot help it.
“You pulled the small straw, huh?”
You giggle a little and he can feel himself puffing up with pride.
“Short straw, you mean?” you laugh, and some of that pride deflates in his chest. He could have sworn it was small, “Either way, yes. Very much so. I’ll be glad when Tiff’s back at it.”
“So when ya said that you were part of the PR team…you actually meant that y’ run it, right?”
“Guilty. What gave me away?”
“Just an air about ya,” Jamie says, because he doesn’t have a fucking clue what to say. You seem to like his answer, ducking your head a little in a way that’s driving Jamie to distraction, so he decides he’s definitely getting in over his head here. He’d already decided he was not going to flirt. It was a terrible idea, “Anyway, I’ve taken up enough of y’ time. Are y’ sure me bit was okay?”
You look startled at the mention of how much time he’s taken up, like you haven’t even thought about it. Soon enough, that ducked head is gone, replaced by the shoulders back, head up attitude that you’d greeted him with, the one that had told him you were in charge. Professional. He couldn’t decide which version he liked more.
“It was perfect, they’ll love it. Such a great story, even better that it’s true,” you confirm, then you add, like you’ve been holding it in, “Richmond ‘til we die, right?”
He actually feels his heart skip, just for a moment: a moment that tells him he’s absolutely fucked. You look like you’ve just told him the biggest secret of the century and he can’t help but believe you. 
“You-“ he’s too breathy, has to cough to correct himself, “You’re a Richmond fan? Or do ya have to say that to all of us?”
“I’m not supposed to say that to any of you,” you grin, “We’re supposed to keep club level allegiances to ourselves. We’re all one England team and all that. But, you know, star striker tells you the most adorable story about your hometown club, it’s pretty hard not to tell them. Think you can keep it to yourself?”
He’d definitely do whatever you asked of him right now. He wants to go and call Keeley right away, but he already knows what she’ll say. Bad idea: wrong place, wrong time, wrong woman. She’d be right. He shakes aside all thoughts of any harmless flirting with the exceedingly kind, exceedingly pretty Richmond fan. 
“Me lips are sealed,” he says, and he mimes it. He even throws the invisible key in your direction and watches you pretend to struggle to catch it, then mime swallowing it yourself. You finish with a rather convincing gulp then nod at him, like you've just entered a blood pact. He nods back, matching the serious energy.
“Enjoy England camp, Just Jamie,” you say, still with an air of fake seriousness the two of you are keeping up. He wants to shake your hand, continue to play pretend, but there’s the sound of a suitcase behind him and he knows you have work to do. He hopes you don’t like anyone's music choice more than his.
“See ya around, Just Y/N.”
You both nod again and it’s getting a bit stupid now but the two of you seem to want to keep it up. He tries ever so hard not to look back at you once he’s inside, and he almost manages it until he hears you talking to the next arrival. He turns to see you in full professional flow…
With two of his old City teammates.
It’s a bucket of cold water over his head. One pretty girl to greet him and he’s managed to use it as a distraction, a way of forgetting all his doubts, worries, fears. Seeing the two City guys brings them back full force, so he glances back at you once more, then turns to delve further into the training complex, hoping to find another face as friendly as yours.
There’s a voice in his head telling him that would be impossible, but he doesn’t want to listen to it right now.
---
if you got this far, i fucking love you <3 oneshot/drabble requests remain open for sexy little jamie tartt and his grumpy bestie roy!!
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scoonsalicious · 2 months
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Unwanted: Chapter 25, Unprotected - Pt. 4
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Fem!Reader
Summary: When your FWB relationship with your best friend Bucky Barnes turns into something more, you couldn’t be happier. That is, however, until a new Avenger sets her sights on your super soldier and he inadvertently breaks your heart. You take on a mission you might not be prepared for to put some distance between the two of you and open yourself up to past traumas. Too bad the only one who can help you heal is the one person you can no longer trust.
Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, medical procedures, Pocket getting called out on her shit, deep discussions, mentions of drug use and anonymous sex.
Word Count: 2.7k
Previously On...: You woke up in the hospital to some quite... surprising news.
A/N: LET THE HEALING SORT OF BEGIN! I AM READY FOR IT.
NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when new story parts drop, please follow @scoonsaliciousupdates
Banner By: The absolutely amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917!
Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!
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A few hours later, you were discharged with antibiotics to stave off any potential infection and over-the counter iron tablets to help replenish all the blood you’d lost. The car ride back to the safehouse was awkward in its heavy silence, the only words spoken between you and Bucky were when you asked to stop at the local pharmacy to buy out their stock of hydrogen peroxide. You’d need to tackle those blood stains in your bedroom before they had time to fully set.
As you walked in the door to the apartment, Bucky on your heels, you took in the space as he would be seeing it for the very first time– it was an absolute mess, with clothes strewn about, fast food wrappers and empty liquor bottles littering every available surface. You watched his eyes as they raked over the mess, pausing to linger on the empty condom wrappers your last Bad Decision had left on the coffee table, next to the remnants of the coke you two had done.
“What the fuck is this?” he asked. “Did someone break in and trash the place while you were in the hospital?”
You grabbed a discarded bra from the back of an armchair, where Bad Decision #... something, had tossed it in his hurry to get at you. “Wasn’t exactly expecting company,” you grumbled defensively. 
Bucky laughed nervously. “What, so you’ve just been having random sex and getting drunk everyday?” The look he gave you was desperate, as though begging you to contradict him, to tell him it was all some sort of joke you were playing on him, but you just stood there in silence, not meeting his eyes.
“Jesus Christ, Pocket, this isn’t you,” Bucky exhaled. “None of this is who you are. What have you been doing  to yourself?”
“No,” you scoffed, “this is who you made me, Barnes. So, if you have a problem with what I’ve become, you’ve only got yourself to blame.” You opened your arms wide to encompass the entire apartment, and by extension, the evidence of your downward spiral. “Welcome to the consequences of your own actions!”
“Fuck.” Bucky ran a tired hand down his face after a moment of stunned silence. “I did do this to you, didn’t I? God, I’m so sorry, Pocket. If I could take it back, I would. I know that’s just more empty words, and you’re probably sick of hearing them, but it’s the truth. Hurting you is the biggest regret of my life.”
“Yet, you keep doing it,” you said, sighing heavily. You flopped down on the couch, exhausted and sore. The nurse had warned you there’d be residual cramping, and had insisted that regular ibuprofen would take care of it, but you’d already had six-hundred milligrams and were still aching. You wondered briefly if you had any oxy left from the club, but decided that getting high in front of Bucky was probably not the smartest move you could make right now, so you opted to deal.
Bucky walked over and made a move like he was about to sit down next to you, but something caught his eye. Bending over, he ran a finger through the white powder residue on the coffee table, bringing it to his tongue to taste.
“Shit,” he said, making a face. “Pocket, is this cocaine?!”
“What are you, McGruff the Crime Dog?” you asked sarcastically, before realizing the reference was probably completely wasted on him. He just continued to stare at you expectantly. “So what if it is?” You asked with a shrug. 
“Since when do you do coke?” Bucky asked incredulously. You really didn’t like the way he was looking at you at the moment. Like he had opened the fridge, looking for a carton of milk, but instead found a giraffe in a three-piece suit.
“Since I ran out of oxy,” you said nonchalantly. “And molly.”
A change came over Bucky’s features, and you watched them go hard, judging. “You’ve been doing all this– the drinking, the drugs, sleeping around with god knows who, while you’ve been pregnant?! What? It wasn’t enough to kill our baby, you had to try to kill yourself in the process? Do you know how absolutely fucking stupid you’re being?!” He was shouting at you now, the anger he’d been holding at bay since the hospital coming out in full force. 
You stood back up, taking in a shuddering breath. You hadn’t expected him to blow up at you so unexpectedly. “I didn’t know,” you said softly, voice trembling. “I didn’t know I was pregnant.”
“Would it have made a fucking difference?” he roared. “You already admitted you would have aborted it if you had known! Can you honestly say you wouldn’t have risked the baby’s health– your health– even if you did know?”
You didn’t have an answer to that. “I don’t know,” you whispered.
“Pocket,” the anger seemed to leave Bucky almost as quickly as it had come, “if you hadn’t gotten medical attention right when you did, you could have died. You could have bled out, gone into septic shock. This miscarriage could have fucking killed you. Do you know what that would have done to me? To Sam and Steve? Nat, Wanda, Pepper? What it would have done to fucking Tony?” You were hit with a sudden wave of guilt. In your spiral, you hadn’t considered for a moment what your actions would have meant to the people who loved you. You only cared about forgetting your own pain. 
“When you were getting dressed to come home, I asked the nurse what could have caused the miscarriage. One of the things she mentioned was heavy drug use, but I didn’t pay it any attention. I thought ‘no, not my Pocket, she’s too smart to do something so incredibly dumb; has to be something else.’ But here you are, throwing your entire life away. And for what? Some cheap thrills? And now, you’ve gone and lost a baby and you don’t even care!”
It was too much. His words were getting to be too much, and you were dangerously close to losing it. “Of course I fucking care!” you sobbed, the damn breaking and setting free a flood of tears you’d been pretending weren’t just waiting to spill. “I had our baby– ours, yours and mine– and I fucking lost it because I needed to forget how much pain I was in! How much you fucking made me hurt! It’s been almost two months and I still want to die when I think about you with her. I want to fucking die.”
Bucky’s arms were around you as you collapsed into him, gasping for air between choking sobs. “I close my eyes, and it’s all I can see,” you wailed. “I’ve fucked so many men trying to forget about you, to feel anything besides despair, but all they do is remind me of what I’m missing, what I lost. All the drinking, the drugs, all the sex– I just wanted to forget, to have a few minutes where I could pretend my life wasn’t ruined, that the best thing I ever had hadn’t been stolen away from me!”
Bucky held you tighter, rubbing soothing patterns into your back in an attempt to calm you. “And I just keep losing,” you cried. “I lost you, I lost our baby, I lost Chloe.”
If Bucky wondered who Chloe was, he knew it wasn’t the right time to ask. “Hey,” he said, tilting your chin up so you were looking at him and wiping the tears from your cheeks, “you haven’t lost me. I’m still right here. I know I fucked up. I don’t expect you to forgive me; I don’t deserve it, but I’m always going to be here, no matter what. And, okay, you lost this baby. But that doesn’t mean you won’t have a chance for another.”
“I don’t want someone else’s baby,” you told him, wiping at the tears that just wouldn’t stop coming, and choosing to completely ignore the fact that you’d lost him in every way that actually mattered. “This was the only chance for our baby, and I destroyed it! It’s the universe’s way of telling me I’m not supposed to be a mother.”
“Why the fuck would you think that?” Bucky asked accusingly. “What makes you think you wouldn’t be an amazing mom?”
You let out a hard laugh through your tears. “What the fuck do I know about being a mother?” you asked him bitterly. “It’s not like I had a shining example of one growing up. All I know how to do is push people away. To make them not love me.” That was the sick truth, your exhausted brain and broken heart were telling you in the moment: your biological father, your mother, Bucky. All of them had turned from you, had pulled their love at the first opportunity. A logical part of your brain would have known this wasn’t the case, and that you had so many more people who did love you, but you weren’t running on logic right now.
“Stop,” Bucky begged, voice cracking. “That’s not true. Sweetheart, that’s not true. You are so damn easy to love, I fell for you immediately. I know you don’t believe it, but I never stopped loving you. I’m never gonna stop loving you.”
“Then why, Bucky?” you cried, clinging to him, desperate for an answer that made sense. “Why did you do this to me?”
Bucky pulled you down onto the couch with him, cradling you in his lap. He gently rocked you back and forth. “Because I’m broken, sweets. I’m broken, and I’m stupid, and I let my anger get the best of me. I was so convinced that you were too good for me, that I didn’t deserve you, that I sabotaged us to prove myself right. But none of that is worth seeing you like this. None of that was worth putting you through all the hurt I did. And I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. Nothing I say can undo it. Nothing I do is gonna change what happened, fix the damage I did to you. All I can do is show you that it’s never gonna happen again, whether or not you ever end up forgivin’ me. There’s never gonna be another girl for me, and if you never want me again, that’s okay; I’ll understand. I deserve it and I’ll learn to live with it, but it’s not gonna change how I feel. You’ll be the last girl I’ll ever make love to, even if you decide you never wanna give me another chance.”
You weren’t sure what to say to that. Simply because you weren’t sure if you’d ever be able to give him another chance. But that reminded you– there was something you wanted to address with him.
“I’m sorry,” you told him softly. 
Bucky narrowed his eyes at you with a tilt of his head. “What are you sorry about, doll? I’m the one who should be spending the rest of their life apologizin’ to you.”
You turned away from him. “I’m sorry about what Hydra did to you,” you said. When he didn’t say anything, you went on: “I, uh, asked Sam,” you continued. “About what you’d told me with the sparring and how you get… excited.” You felt him still beneath you, but didn’t want to lose your nerve. “I’m sorry that I doubted that they put you through that kind of abuse, and I’m so sorry it happened to you. And… I’m– I’m sorry I didn’t make you feel like I was a safe person you could share that part of your past with.”
Bucky let out an agonizingly slow breath. “Sweets,” he began, “it was never about feeling like you weren’t a safe place for me to be open about it. Not once.”
You took in a shuddering breath, hating that you were making this moment, in a way, about you. “But… you told Steve, and Sam and– and… her. But you didn’t tell me.” You risked a glance at him, afraid he was going to be angry at you, but all you saw was patience in his eyes. “I must have said or done something that made you feel like you couldn’t share it with me, and whatever that was, I’m sorry.”
Bucky shook his head sadly and rubbed his human hand up and down your back. “No, baby.” He exhaled. “It was never like that. I didn’t tell you, because I was ashamed.”
You raised your eyes and gave him a questioning look.
“I could tell Sam, and Steve, and even Carthage, because I didn’t give a shit if they thought I was… fucked up… sexually. It didn’t matter what they thought about it, because, well, I wasn’t trying to impress them, to make them want me, want to be with me. But you?” He brought his vibranium hand up to cup your face, turning it so you were looking at him. “I didn’t want you lookin’ at me and thinkin’ that I was broken, that I didn’t… didn’t work right in the way I wanted you the most. I’d never be able to stand it. I was just so ashamed and embarrassed; and I couldn’t stand the thought of you lookin’ at me the way I looked at myself.”
“Barnes,” you offered with a small, small smile, “I have never, not once, even considered you were broken, sexually. Not before I found out, and certainly not after. In fact, I’ve spent the last two months desperately trying to make myself forget just how not fucked up you are in that department.”
Bucky cleared his throat. “Just, uh, outta curiosity, sweets, how many attempts at forgetting are we talking about here?”
You scrunched up your mouth. “You seriously want to know how many guys I’ve fucked since we broke up, Barnes?”
Bucky shrugged his shoulders in a completely failed attempt at seeming nonchalant. “Like I said, just curious. What are we talking… like, two? Three?”
You snorted. Multiply that by ten, you thought. “You really don’t want to know, Barnes. Trust me.”
“Jesus Christ,” he moaned. “More than three?!”
You shrugged awkwardly. “It’s really not any of your business, Bucky.”
He ran a hand through his hair. “Fuck,” he said. “Yeah, yeah, I know it’s not. I just can’t stand the fucking thought of someone else putting their hands on you,” he said through clenched teeth. 
You raised a brow and gave him a sarcastic look. “Hypocrite much?” you asked, though there was no bite behind your words. 
Bucky lowered his head, not meeting your gaze. “Givin’ me a taste of my own medicine, huh, doll? Well, can’t say it’s not fucking bitter, or that I don’t deserve it.”
“I didn’t do it with the purpose of hurting you,” you told him, feeling your tears start to build again. “I did it to get over you. To forget you.”
He brushed a tear from your lashes. “Did it work, doll?” he asked, voice low. “Did you forget? Are you over it?”
You hadn’t. Of course you fucking hadn’t. But you didn’t want him knowing that. Not fully; it was enough though, knowing that he’d felt even a fraction of the jealousy you’d felt. “Hard to say,” you told him, instead. “Maybe the twenty-ninth time’ll be the charm.”
Bucky spluttered and gasped for breath. “TWENTY-NINTH TIME?!? Are you telling me you’ve fucked twenty-eight pieces of shit since you’ve been down here?!” Almost as soon as his frustration burst from him itself, it had died out. “Not my business,” he said, though you could tell he was struggling. 
You’d had enough tormenting him for the night, so you snuggled further into his chest. “Not a single one of them made me forget for a second,” you told him, tilting your head up to look into his eyes. Bucky chuffed and leaned down to kiss the top of your head, and for the first time in months, you felt a hint of the safety you used to feel with him. It was small, but it was there, a tiny ember in a fire you’d feared had long died out. With a rattling sigh, you rested your head against his chest as he continued to rock you, and soon, you were lulled asleep to the sound of his steady, familiar, beloved heartbeat.
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dabislittlemouse · 8 months
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tainted angel🪽 (pt. 6)
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CHAPTER 4 // CHAPTER 5 // CHAPTER 7
ෆ DABI X HAWKS’ LITTLE SISTER
ෆ cw: Dabi being a flirt and a pervert, corruption kink, smut and noncon/ dubcon incoming. Starts with Dabi’s POV ‼️
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Sometimes I get way too excited.
I mentally scold myself for letting my mouth run like that and say risky things. Really don’t want to scare the little angel away, it would only make things harder and less pleasurable if I had to take her by force. Her meek voice already showed me how scared she was, I can imagine her heart beating fast while she nervously chews on that kissable lower lip.
I try to control myself, but those hidden sick desires deep inside of me are urging me to go further. To break her, make her feel paranoid and scared, always wary of her surroundings, always frightened of ending up in my claws. Just so I can eat her out and taste the fear and excitement rolling right on my tongue.
Fuck, that sweet cunt of hers. M’dying for a taste. I could feel the heat of it even through my pants as she sat nicely on my lap. I already took care of myself after she went home, stroking my cock nice and slow at the scent and warmth she left behind with me. But now as my mind replays over and over the way she squealed and whimpered from my touch, the softness of her skin and her perky breasts pressing against my chest, I feel hard again. This never ending cycle is entirely her fault, for being such a tempting little minx and gettin’ me all worked up like this, distracting me from my most important missions.
Yeah, who am I kidding.. she will be right by my side as I burn down the whole world.
The thought gets me all excited, turning a sweet angel like her to be the villain’s girl, to make her go against the rules and morals, that would surely terrify her.
“Dabi, I’d like you to test this nomu, I found one that will totally match your aesthetic!”
The voice snaps me out of my thoughts, I blink in confusion. “Huh?”
“It’s one of the High-End nomus!” doctor Ujiko says.
Ah, yes. The nomus. We’re currently in the lab. The crazy doctor was experimenting with many things lately, and now he wants me to give him a hand. I look at the big glass containers dimly lit in purple light, holding the monstrous creatures inside, most of them still not ready to be awakened.
“Did you even listen to what I said?” I reply, annoyance clear in my features. “I have other matters to attend”
“It won’t be a big deal,” the doctor says, “just let the nomu run free in the city and fight a pro hero, it will obey your orders after all. It’s important to test this nomu in order to proceed with the other ones. And then when it’s done, bring it back here. Easy peasy!”
I hum in response, contemplating things. It would be a great opportunity to test our little pet pro Hawks, sure as hell he wouldn’t like the idea of me bringing a High-End nomu in a populated area. But maybe I can tell him straight ahead, so he can bring me a pro hero in his way, perfect to fight against the nomu.
“Alright” I smirk. “Bring it to me”
***
Doctor Ujiko was right. That monstrosity of a nomu really fit my aesthetic for some reason, I might even start to like it. It seemed stronger than the other bio-engineered nomus I’ve seen before. It could speak a few words, and already learned my name. Seemed more than ready to obey every order that I feel like giving. Heh, if that ain’t a good pet for me. Never had pets before but I could treat myself with a pet nomu this time.
After talking with Hawks, he agreed on the plan that will take place by the end of this week. He would bring a random pro along, I didn’t need any details on who. The High-End was strong enough, I am in fact so concerned for the hero who will take it in a fight. Seems like I’ll have more lives taken away on my name only.
As I turn back to the hideout, my mind goes to my angel. Shit, been too busy with the plan I almost forgot to call her. For some reason I already miss her voice and pretty face, it makes me sick. I grab my burner phone and dial her number.
Though she does not pick up.
I grunt in annoyance before trying again. After two more calls, she finally picks up.
“Took ya long enough” I say, a hint of irritation in my voice, but it fades away as soon as I hear hers.
“Sorry I was cleaning my room and forgot my phone on silent” she says apologetically.
“S’alright, you cleaning your room huh? Good girl. I’ve been a bit busy these days but I didn’t forget ya, doll.”
I sit up and go in front of my mirror, examining my hair while talking to her. “Just called to say that I’ll be taking ya out tonight”
“Oh? Well.. you already made the decision, huh” she replies. “But about that..”
“Don’t worry ‘bout it. This time I’ll take you to a normal place, not empty parks or alleyways” I smirk. “You deserve a real date don’t cha?”
“Y-Yeah..” she mumbles. “But I.. I really wanted to tell you something Dabi. I just… don’t think I can continue seeing you again”
My breathing stops for a moment, seriousness taking over my features as I look back at myself in the mirror.
“Come again?” I reply, and my voice comes off harsher than I intended to. I hear her breath hitch, stuttering a bit on her words as she explains everything to me. My hand instinctively tightens the grip on my phone, almost breaking it.
“I-I think it’s best for me to not be around you. My brother also told me so before, and I don’t want this to be further trouble for me. Besides.. I can’t be around someone who refuses to tell me who he is and what he does, no offence but.. I just don’t feel safe you know.. especially knowing you’ve done bad things and refusing to elaborate.”
I take in a deep breath before letting out a chuckle, my knuckles turning almost white while gripping my phone.
“Told ya it’s not the right moment to tell you. I really hoped you wouldn’t make things harder princess..”
“H-Huh? I’m not making anything harder” she says. “I have more important matters to focus, such as my studies. I can’t let myself get distracted by sneaking out and meeting some mysterious guy.. I mean.. I enjoy your company Dabi, truly, but I don’t think this can go further..”
I click my tongue, feeling the rage in my chest ready to burst out. Ready to get the hell out of here and go take her by force.
“You’re just like your brother aren’t cha?” I respond. “All responsible over your duties, can’t let anything distract ya. Gotta admire that, sure..”
My heated hand grabs a random metallic object on the table, melting it slowly.
“But it is clear as day that you’re being a nasty little liar right now. Tell me doll, once I get over there will you be able to say all this shit straight to my face? That you are oh, so focused on those studies of yours, grade A student, and willing to put down any “distractions”.. I don’t think I’ve told you that I hate liars”
I hear her gasp, a few seconds of silence as she struggles to find words. My voice is stern and threatening, purposely to make her scared and show her that those little games won’t do for me.
“Dabi, just.. just respect my decision okay? I gotta go now, I have stuff to do” she says hurriedly, before hanging up on me.
Oh, you will regret this.
I throw my phone on the ground and bring a heated fist straight to the mirror, breaking it in process. The pieces of glass pierce through my skin, blood already flowing on my knuckles and down my wrist. Though I can’t feel a thing, only rage as my body heats up.
Seems like it’s not that easy to corrupt the little angel, huh..
But through all that rage, I feel a sense of thrill. I’m a lazy bastard sometimes, that I can admit. When it doesn’t benefit my goals, I don’t like chasing anything, pretty much not caring about most stuff. But she got my engines going, as much as I might hate putting in effort, having her has become one of my main goals. And this chase is only going to make things sweeter in the end. She can play hard to get as much as she wants, it only riles me up even more.
Today I will let her be. Tomorrow too. Let her think that I’m a decent guy who will respect her stupid little decisions, that I left her alone for good. And only then, when she is the least prepared, I will appear again, catch her off guard, weak and helpless in front of me.
A wicked grin spreads widely across my face. This game’s just getting started.
*****
[Her POV]
It has been a few days since my last call with Dabi. Even though I haven’t heard from him since, this silence on his side is making me feel uneasy the whole time. I expected for him to send me a text message after I hung up, or maybe for him to call me back again.
But he didn’t do anything. He simply vanished. Of course this is what I wanted, or maybe thought that I wanted. This was the most logical decision I could make on my side, though I do not feel calm with this.
Especially with the way his voice tone changed and got deeper, harsher, I’ve never heard him sound like that before. A voice which held nothing but promising threats, I felt like I really made a mistake.
But Dabi hasn’t appeared or called since, so I should be fine right?
One part of me is still needy for him, regretting that I cut him off like this. The things he made me feel were sinful, but it all felt so good and I couldn’t get enough. Dabi was irresistibly handsome, I tried to not fall for him but-
I should remain logical, and not go down a rabbit hole where I might never escape from. This was for the best.
“I’m going now!” I say to my mom as I grab my bag, getting ready for school. It was early in the morning, and I felt more than ready to start a new day.
“Be careful hun” she responds me as I head downstairs. Lately I’ve wondered if mom is okay, she’s been looking way too lost in thoughts, always zoning out. Jumpy at every sound or anytime the doorbell rang. Almost paranoid too. When I ask her if there’s something wrong, she brushes it off and tells me to not worry, that she’s just tired.
I really wonder why these people like to hide things from me.
Getting out of my house and closing the door behind me, I notice something placed on the doorstep.
No way.
I feel my heart dropping and my eyes stay glued on the blue roses on the ground, wrapped nicely together.
Just like the one he gave me that night.
But that can’t be. He hasn’t been interested to call me back for days, nor come and meet me. Clearly I was some mere entertainment for him right? He’d surely go find another girl to toy around with, that’s what I thought at some point. He’s got to have many options.
My hands tremble slightly as I grab the roses, and I notice a small postcard attached to them.
Maybe I should not read it. Just throw the roses in the trash and continue with my day. But I can’t do it.
I inahle deeply, calming myself before reading the postcard. I feel the world around me freezing, everything falling silent and all I can hear are my own heartbeats.
“𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒃𝒆𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒊𝒇𝒖𝒍 𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒔𝒍𝒆𝒆𝒑. 𝑯𝒐𝒑𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒔𝒆 𝒓𝒐𝒔𝒆𝒔 𝒃𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒆𝒏 𝒖𝒑 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈. 𝑴𝒊𝒔𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖, 𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒍. 𝑺𝒆𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒔𝒐𝒐𝒏”
-𝑫
My breath hitches as I read what was written, swallowing hard while my panicked eyes study my surroundings. Nobody was there. These might’ve been left overnight on my doorstep.
The thought of him wandering around my house at night while I sleep peacefully makes my skin crawl. And the worst, watching me.
The note he left would normally be called wholesome and cute under normal circumstances. But all I could make out of it was something ominous, a threat wrapped in sweet words and pretty roses. My first thought was to tell Keigo, but some part of me feels guilty, because it was me who gave Dabi the chance to get closer, despite from being told to stay away. And now I can’t get him off my back.
I must deal with this by my own, simple as that. I am not a child to hide behind my big brother’s hero cap.
With that, I crush the roses and throw them in the trash, while tearing off the postcard. I will ignore this for now, and keep watch tonight just in case. This man can’t scare me at my own house, no way. If he shows up again, I will take matters into my own hands.
And if things escalate, only then I will call Keigo.
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(Chapter 7 will have smut and nonconsensual stuff‼️)
🏷️ tags: @mostlyheinous @dabislittlebeaniebaby @dabihawksluva @scariusaquarius @touyalove @awalkingshame @syrenkitsune
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ahgasegotarmy116 · 5 months
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He Doesn't Deserve You | A Jeon Jungkook Series | Chapter One
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Summary: Life didn't turn out the way you wanted. You got the guy, and the job but everything else you had ever wanted has been crumbling around you. Pairing: Noona reader x Jeon Jungkook (She's 28 and he's 22) Word Count: 2.1k~ Warnings: yändere, manipulation, domestic violence, self harm, cheating, explicit language, hints at smut, angst, idk what else lol a/n: Ahh thank you so much for all of the love so far on the intro and even all the notes on the masterlist hehe. I'm really loving the direction this story is going in so I hope you guys will too! And thanks again to @kkusadmirer for the request!
Opening my laptop I pull up the most recent edit I had done on the next chapter I was working on. 
I'm a writer, not an incredibly famous one but a writer nonetheless. I make enough to get by and I'm able to work from home so that's all I ever really wanted. Just a silly girl, writing her silly stories, living her silly life. 
But unfortunately things don't always turn out the way you want them to. 
I thought I had it all, perfect grades and a perfect boyfriend with a loving family and a bright bright future. Now looking back at it all and seeing all of the stuff in the background that I somehow missed just makes me feel foolish.
How could I not notice Taehyung wondering eye? Why did I not listen to what my friends used to say about him? Why did I leave all of my friends behind for him? 
Being so wrapped up and so in love with him I didn't even notice the fact that my family was falling apart. My mom cheated on my dad and I never knew until they told me they were getting a divorce.
While my brother was struggling in high school while being around all of their screaming and fighting and finally got committed to a mental institution when he had a psychotic break.
I never knew anything about that. It's not like I didn't care, but I just never really reached out or gave them enough time to reach out to me. 
I was always like 'Oh Tae just got home I have to go' or 'Tae is expecting me so I need to get going'. My world has revolved around him for so long that my family and friends feel like strangers. 
How could I have been so stupid and neglected them, all for one guy?
The one that I wanted to build a future with and promised to do the same with me. Now here I am, 24 with student loans up to my neck and a sorry excuse for a marriage with a husband that is never home. 
I don't know what I managed to do in my past life that ended up royally fucking me up in this one but I'm sorry. Why couldn't I have done better so I would be saved from having my spirit broken and my heart ripped to shreds. 
The only positive thing is that this has given me is the inspiration to come up with an even more fucked up series of books that has been my only source of income for the past few years. 
Years, wow. 
Thinking about how much time has passed and how things went to shit so quickly helped me continue down this downward spiral and I don't know how to make it stop. Although the sound of keys jingling outside the front door is my rude awakening, my brain knowing I need to be conscious of what may happen next.
 I quickly wipe off the tears that I didn't even realized had started to fall and clear my throat. Moments later I'm met with the sight of Taehyung walking in wearing the same shirt I had seen him in yesterday but sports a brand new hickey near the collar, just barely noticeable but he makes no effort to hide it. 
"Y/n" I hear him call out, breaking me out of my train of thought. "Yes?" I question, hating that I've been caught off guard even though I was staring right at him. "I asked if we have anything to eat" he says, making his way over to the refrigerator, now going to see if he can answer his own question before I'm even given another second to speak up. 
"Um yeah I think there's some left over pizza from last night" I say and get up to walk towards him. "So how was work yesterday?" I ask tentatively, still not sure what kind of mood he's in. "Exhausting but it is what it is I guess" he says while stuffing his face full of a cold slice of pepperoni pizza. 
I turn to walk away while nodding my head, not bothering to ask anything else since it seems from his vague answers that he's not in the mood to talk. 
"Hey" he says, gently grabbing my wrist with the hand that wasn't occupied with the pizza, leaving me frozen in place. I know better than to walk away from him. Even if he's not mad at the moment doesn't mean that he won't be in the next. 
"Where are you running off to?" he asks pulling me close by that same wrist. Still doing so carefully but pressing on the bruises that he had left there from the last fight we had. 
He sees my slight look of discomfort and how my vision is trained on the wrist he's still holding and rolls up my sleeve, taking a quick look and seeing the evidence of his past transgressions.
"It left a mark huh?" he says examining the spot further and then bringing it up to his face where he places a few featherlight kisses on it, making a flash of heat run through my system when he looks back up at me with those eyes.
Those bedroom eyes that never fail to put me in a trance. He lifts his hand up towards my face and I flinch not knowing what to expect and see him stopping for a second, surprised by my reaction.
"Don't be afraid baby, it's just me" he says and keeps going, hooking his finger on the collar of my turtleneck to pull it to the side, no doubt searching for other marks. 
"There's marks here too. I guess it's a good thing you stay home. Don't want to have to make up excuses for those now would you?" he says tapping under my chin twice, a slight lilt in his tone, enjoying my clear discomfort in showing them to someone, even if it's the person that's caused them.
"What did you do today baby?" he asks, letting go of me and going back to grab a few other things out of the fridge to complete his meal. "Oh you know, just some writing" I say, trailing off and giving him the same answer that I've given him time and time again. 
"You almost done with it?" he questions, only really asking so he knows when my next big payday will be. 
I shake my head "No, not yet. I think I'm only about halfway though" I say, giving simple answers to his simple questions. "Well you better get it out soon. I bet your readers are dying to know what happens next" he says giving me a quick wink before taking everything he has in his hands and carrying it over to the couch. 
"Do you think you could grab me a beer?" he asks, but I know it's more of a courtesy than anything phrasing it like I actually had an option. I respond with a quiet yeah and bring it over to him, placing it on the coffee table. 
"Thanks babe" he says and grabs a ahold of my hand and angles his head up, clearly asking for a kiss to which I oblige. Again something I don't really have an option in doing. "I missed you" he says and rubs his nose against mine cutely, or at least it used to be cute. Now it just makes me sad thinking of all of those times when we were happy.
"Are you gonna watch the game with me?" this time giving me something that I actually have a choice in. "I think I've got some more writing I'd like to do" I say and he nods his head not even bothering to look at me or give me a verbal sign of acknowledgment before turning on said game and slumping back into the couch to watch. 
I walk over to my desk that happens to unfortunately be in the living room so I'm forced to grab my headphones to drown out the sound so I can hopefully get another chapter or two in before I call it a night. 
~~~~~~
"Baby" I hear him call for me through my headphones after some time, that's something that I've had to fine tune. Making sure I can hear him when he talks to me no matter what so it's one less thing I have to worry about him getting upset about. 
I pull out my headphones and turn my attention towards him, half expecting him to ask me to get him a beer. "Yes?" I reply, waiting to see what he needs. "Come here" he says holding his hand out to me and spreading his legs, showing me where he wants me. 
I get up and walk towards him, straddling him once I get close enough and putting my arms around his neck. "Hi" he says in a deep voice sending a shockwave through my nervous system. "Hi" I respond quietly, intimidated at the thought of what he might do next. "How was the game?" I ask tentatively, hoping for my own sake that there was a favorable result. 
"We won" he says, mindlessly tracing his hands up and down my curves. "How's your book?" he asks leaning into my neck, placing kisses over the bruises he had noticed from before. "
It's going" I whisper, starting to feel breathless from his warm breath fanning the sensitive parts of my skin. "Ready for a break?" he asks, question laced with a mischievous tone. I hum in acknowledgment, tilting my head to the side so he can have his fun.
~~~~~~
"I'm gonna head out but I'll be back later" Taehyung says while getting dressed with me still laying there with only a sheet to cover my body. "You're leaving?" I question, knowing he just said that but hoping he'll give me some sort of explanation.
"The guys wanted to meet up for a couple of drinks to talk about the game. Get some rest okay? I'll be back in a few hours" he says planting a soft kiss on my lips and one on my forehead. 
I nod as he pulls the comforter over me as well, starting to already to drift off to sleep. "Stay safe" I mumble and flip over to the other side to try and get more comfortable.
He looks down at me for a second and chuckles at my fucked out and sleepy state before walking out of our bedroom and soon I'm left with the sound of him closing and locking the door behind him. 
Although this night was bittersweet I'm thankful that it ended up like this. He's not a selfish lover when it comes to sex so I'm always left sleepy and satisfied except for the times that he's more rough, rough is putting it lightly so I guess I should say when he's more violent. 
I hate thinking about those nights and I refuse to let those dark thoughts cloud this physical euphoric feeling I have but I can't help but worry about what he might actually be going out to do.
 Would having a drink with the guys really make him want to leave his naked and freshly fucked wife alone in his bed? I just don't get it. If he's already been with me tonight could there be a possibility that he would wake up in another woman's bed and leave me waking up alone again tomorrow?
There's no use worrying about it though. It's not like it hasn't happened before, but why do I always let it get to me? Yes he's my husband but our marriage isn't like other ones in anyway shape or form. I'm here when he wants or needs me and that's it. I'm not allowed to want or need him because I'm just left disappointed every single time.
He doesn't love me, he just loves what I can give him and I need to come to terms with that. But it's nights like these where he's gentle and whispers sweet nothings in my ear that make me second guess things. 
Maybe he's changed? Maybe he's realized what actually matters? And maybe I'm just getting my hopes up. I can't keep lying to myself but I don't know what else to do. I feel alone most days but these little glimmers of hope are what keep me holding on and unfortunately that's all I have left. 
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evermoresversion · 6 months
Text
ㅤㅤ♡⃕ ﹙meant to be, jeremiah fisher & conrad fisher. chapter three.﹚
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A/N Sorry this has taken me more time than it should.
PAIRING Jeremiah Fisher x Fem!Reader, Conrad Fisher x Fem!Reader
TW/TAGS Kind of an AU, fluff.
SUMMARY When you returned to the summer house in Cousins with Conrad you never imagined that for a small moment shared with him you could realize that your feelings weren't as clear as you thought.
SONG Delicate by Taylor Swift.
REQUESTS ARE CLOSED | JEREMIAH'S MASTERLIST | CONRAD'S MASTERLIST | MASTERLIST | SERIES' MASTERLIST
After you left there with Conrad towards Cousins, the first thing you saw was the mess that had been left in the summer house.
You looked at Conrad as he left his backpack on the side of the door and he then looked at you.
"Should we clean up?" You asked, wrinkling your nose in disgust.
"Yes, yes we should." he nodded with a small smile. You made the same gesture, leaving your things in a corner so you can go get things to paint the graffiti-stained wall.
Conrad was in charge of taking some things out of some boxes and taking them to their respective places.
After a few minutes when you were almost done painting, Conrad silently approached you, took paint on his finger and smeared it on your nose, making you gasp in surprise.
You looked at him with your eyes and mouth wide open. "You didn't do that."
"Yes I did, what are you going to do about it?" He challenged you and you denied with an amused smile.
"It's your end, Fisher." You took paint in the container you had been using previously and walked slowly towards him but Conrad, seeing your intentions, began to run away from you, leading you both to start a chase throughout the house.
"You're too slow." He mocked, stopping for a moment but as soon as you almost caught up with him he ran towards the garden again.
"It's not fair! You're taller than me." You exclaimed and stopped for a moment so you could catch your breath. Conrad also stopped and as soon as you walked towards him again, he did too, only with his back turned so as not to lose sight of you.
"Be careful!" You exclaimed as you watched him walk near the edge of the pool.
"What?" He frowned but took another step and then fell into the pool, making you laugh. "Goddamn!" He cursed as soon as he came back to the surface and you couldn't stop laughing.
"That's called karma, Connie baby." You scoffed and he looked at you with narrowed eyes and an amused smile.
He swam to edge and extended his hand to you. "Please help me." Now it was your turn to squint and seeing that you weren't losing anything, you left the container with the paint aside on the ground and leaned over the pool to extend your hand to Conrad and help him.
Big mistake.
"Shit!" You exclaimed a couple of seconds after you felt Conrad pull your hand to sink you into the pool with him.
You swam to the surface and playfully pushed Conrad.
"You're an idiot, you know that?" He smiled at you as you fixed your hair.
"You're a fool, you know that?" He counterattacked and you gave him the middle finger.
The two of you stayed looking at each other for a few seconds and as soon as you realized that you looked at something else but him and he did the same.
"We should keep cleaning, it's getting dark."
"Yeah, you're right." He nodded, swimming to the edge and with his arms he pushed himself up to get out of the pool and you wished you hadn't gawked at the muscles in his back contracting. When he realized that you had been distracted he laughed softly. "Are you okay?"
"Yes, I'm just a little tired." You lied and swam towards where he was.
"Whatever you say." He smiled sideways and out of nowhere put his hands on your waist. "Here." He murmured and with a single movement he had already pulled you out of the water and you were sitting on the edge next to him.
You wished you hadn't been nervous with the easy way he was able to get you out of the water, with the easy way he handled you as if you weighed nothing, like a rag doll.
"Thank you." You thanked him kindly and he stood up from the ground, offering you his hand to help you.
"It doesn't matter." He smiled once more as soon as the two were standing you entered back into the house and you already had the container in your hand again.
He went to get a couple of towels and gave you one, taking the container from your hands so you could dry yourself.
"You have some paint here." He approached you and murmured, removing the remaining paint on your nose. "There you go."
"Thank you." You thanked him once again and were surprised to notice that your heart was beating rapidly due to his closeness. And you were surprised to notice that at no point since the two of you had arrived at Cousins, had you thought about Jeremiah.
Now he was the one who spoke as soon as the two fell silent.
"Aren't you hungry? Don't you want me to order something? I'm starving." Conrad said as he walked towards where his phone was supposed to be.
The ghost of a smile crossed your lips at his words and you walked behind him.
Maybe you weren't as in love with Jeremiah as you thought.
disclaimer ── evermoresversion © 2023.
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siilvan · 9 months
Text
bloodsport – interlude
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prologue | one | two | three | four | next
characters: vladimir makarov
summary: while waiting for your answer, makarov ponders on your unusual relationship and his yet-unknown motivations.
genre: angst, slowburn, enemies to ?, fem!reader (callsign: petra)
warnings: semi-proofread, cursing, canon-typical violence, descriptions of blood/injuries, makarov’s pov, he’s a bit fucked up mentally, light obsession?, couple mentions of sex, it's like a character study idk
word count: 2.4k
note: shit's officially hitting the fan in the next chapter, so... enjoy this sorta-kinda character study? dive into makarov's very odd "romantic" side? idk what to call it. hope you like it! ( ̄▽ ̄)
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"i suppose i could protect you."
"i'm not joining your side, even for this."
vladimir makarov has never been a patient man. when he wants something, he takes it. strength, respect, power— he's razed cities and ended lives for less than that.
but, he's learned patience. his time in the military proved fruitful in this endeavor; being a captain forces a person to wait for things, to work smartly and plan for the future. ever since he left those days behind, he's continued to learn, and now proudly declares himself a master of self-control.
few things can break the restraint that he's put on himself. few people can.
makarov examines the board tacked up on the wall across from him. he leans back in his arm chair and reaches for the tumbler at his side, the whiskey in the glass sloshing against the sides as he lifts it to his lips. he furrows his brow, his attention flitting between the images on the board.
the one-four-one. the task force he technically has to thank for his ascension to the top of the ultranationalists - well, he mainly has his own efforts over the years to thank for that, but he won't deny that the group made things easier by eliminating zakhaev's incompetent heir back in verdansk.
pictures of the members of the squad - and, a handful of allies - stare back at him. his longtime enemy, captain price, ghost, soap, gaz, "nikolai," commander karim...
and, yourself. lieutenant petra. your real name briefly flashes through his mind as he shifts in his seat, his focus now solely on you.
his eyes linger on the photo of you pinned alongside your teammates' portraits. he's well aware that his personal vendetta against price causes him to act irrationally, but you... for whatever reason, makarov is easily influenced by you. he'll die before admitting it aloud, but he's become somewhat enamored with you.
why?
makarov sets the glass aside once more and stands, crossing the small space and stopping in front of the board. he all but ignores any information not pertaining to you. his eyes find you in group photos, he relentlessly scans dossiers and files of information on your professional and personal lives, he reads through your messages with each other and replays the conversations you've shared...
his mind drifts back to your first meeting, just two weeks ago.
⋆⋆⋆
the al-mazrah sun is violent overhead, beating down on him and his men. makarov's grown accustomed to the heat, but the few mumbled complaints that he overhears from his soldiers threaten to make him snap.
he would, if not for the good news overriding the frustration being imposed on him right now. everything has been going to plan— the few bumps in the road have ultimately done little to deter him from reaching his goals. the only worry is the task force in the city; shadow company is an annoyance, but the one-four-one is a true threat to makarov's plans.
when he comes across the scene of destruction, it's almost as if his prayers for the team's elimination are answered. three members of it are in the area; the two men - sergeants gaz and soap, he recognizes fairly quickly - lay pinned under rubble or incapacitated, while the third member stares at him in a daze from a spot closer by.
makarov fights back a twisted grin when he notices the fear gloss over your disoriented expression. you can hardly stay conscious, much less put up a fight, and as one of your teammates frantically shouts for you, he realizes he may have an opportunity here.
you're already fading in and out of consciousness when he orders his men to remove any of the wreckage covering you and, by the time makarov crouches down to gather your mangled body in his arms, you're out cold. the only resistance he faces are weak protests from the sergeants.
in his benevolence, makarov decides to spare the two. they'll dig themselves out of this or succumb to their injuries - either way, it's not his concern.
you, however, take in shallow, ragged breaths in his arms, and he knows that you require care if he intends to keep you alive. the squad accompanying him are soldiers, not doctors— they can do nothing to help, but he can stabilize you in the meantime. that's what he tells himself as he orders his men to evacuate, clutching you close to his chest until the transport plane arrives. he lays you across a section of the seats, barking at one of the soldiers to grab the medical supplies, and rolls his sleeves up to his elbows with a heavy sigh.
he's no medic himself - quite the opposite, in fact - but makarov knows enough from his years in the field.
he ushers his men away from you once the supplies are delivered, forcing them to huddle up at the opposite end of the plane as he works. your injuries are severe, but still remarkably mild compared to what they could have been. it's a small miracle that every limb of yours is still intact.
you don't stir at all, even as he peels your gear off and carelessly discards it on the floor, before dragging your shirt up to your chest and examining the sizeable gash running down your side. steady hands clean and disinfect the dirt-stained wound and stitch it closed before his focus shifts to the burns starting to bloom on your skin.
it's a nasty sight, but it hardly fazes him. makarov rolls your sleeves above the afflicted areas on your arms and loosely wraps them in gauze, making a mental note to put you in something with shorter sleeves once you arrive at the prison. he's hurried in wrapping the burns covering your back; not because he is impatient, but because he can sense the prying eyes desperately trying to peer at your partially uncovered form after he removes your shirt.
if they weren't still flying above contested territory, he'd punish his men for their lack of diligence.
makarov carries you into the prison and to the small office that the doctor was permitted after finally arriving. tarkovsky sends him a curious look when he sets you down, already pulling on a pair of sterile gloves and preparing his equipment.
"i trust that you will give her the best care, doctor," makarov utters, stepping back from the operating table. "i will accept nothing less."
tarkovsky hums in acknowledgement as he carefully cuts your uniform open and looks over the freshly completed work. "you've never brought me a prisoner in a condition like this," he replies, referencing the dressings that he starts to unravel. "is she a special target, commander?"
"one-four-one." he says, curt. the doctor seems to understand and nods in response, already beginning to tend to your wounds.
"she will receive nothing but the best, commander makarov."
it barely takes a day for you to awaken, a fact that surprises even makarov himself. he personally handled delivering you to your cell, not trusting any of the depraved prison guards with such a task, and occupied himself with other matters until he received the news that you were awake.
you were as spirited as he expected from someone of your caliber. stubborn, confident, and competent in what you do. it took you over a week to finally kill one of his men, and the one you did kill...
he was pleased with your performance, and he did not spare the rod with the guards assigned to your surveillance.
makarov had been in the middle of dealing with one of the general's men that managed to slip under his radar. he was attacked after a private meeting with his council, earning several cuts from the man's blade before he successfully disarmed and pinned the agent to the floor, beating him into submission. his fists were bruised and smeared red from the force behind each swing, perhaps a bit excessive, but he didn't pay it any mind.
until another man came sprinting down the hall, briefly pausing at the sight of his commander standing over an "ally" beaten to a bloody pulp, only snapping out of his shock after makarov turns to face him. the soldier opened his mouth and practically vomited out his words, something about "the prisoner attacking the doctor."
the sight that he was greeted with upon arriving at your cell could only be described as stimulating.
you, the ever-disciplined lieutenant, disheveled and staring back at him with a wild look in your eyes, refusing to falter even as you're outnumbered and backed into a corner with guns drawn and pointed at you. makarov tore his gaze from you and allowed it to fall to the man lying dead in a heap - the younger, less experienced doctor that tarkovsky insisted on keeping around despite knowing that his commander wanted to wring the brat's neck.
needless to say, he wasn't disappointed with your choice of victim.
⋆⋆⋆
"i'm assuming you're not here to share the fun story behind those obvious self-defense wounds?"
if he didn't know better, makarov could almost mistake the question as coming from a place of concern rather than contempt. you have no reason to feel anything but hatred for him, though - nor does he have a reason to feel anything but the same for you.
still, he steps back from the board and reaches for his drink again, beginning to pace around the room as the interaction plays in his head. your sarcasm and attitude only serve to wear out his carefully-crafted patience— but, the way you responded when faced with almost certain death, the blood smeared across your skin, the proficiency that you maintained despite your condition...
he stops in the center of the room, fingers clenching and unclenching around the glass.
fuck, you were beautiful.
his jaw tenses, adam's apple bobbing as he swallows down the unfamiliar sense of desire that sits thick in his throat.
it's not like makarov is unacquainted with this side of himself. he's bedded a fair number of women in the past, he is far from a virginal saint. he seldom spends nights with company, however. it's just more convenient to deal with his needs alone and get on with his work; he's never wanted anything more.
but then, there's you.
you make his blood boil and frustrate him like no other. not even the captain, his sworn enemy, can rile him up as easily as you do. he's fascinated with you and the rage that you seem to awaken from somewhere deep inside of him. he feels nothing but anger towards you— even as he sits alone in his quarters, bringing himself to his peak, imagining you before him, under him, pleading for more.
a sudden pain in his hand distracts him from his thoughts, roughly yanking him back to reality. makarov looks down and blinks at the sight of blood pouring from his palm, unceremoniously dripping onto the floor below. the tumbler that was nestled comfortably in his grasp now clatters to the ground in pieces, leaving behind a small collection of shards embedded in his skin.
the amber whiskey mixes with the crimson that slowly pools at his feet, a sickening color combination that brings a smile to his lips.
this is your fault. he flexes his fingers, brow twitching from the pain that shoots through the area, and revels in the misery that you've indirectly caused. he wants more of it.
you are loyal to your team, loyal to your cause— on one hand, he admires it. on the other, it only tempts him to see how far you're willing to go, how far he can push you before you break. everyone has their weakness, even you. all he has to do is find it.
he could see the hesitation in your eyes the last time you spoke - in a collapsed building in the middle of a war zone, with enemies and allies both scattered in the streets, surrounding your location. you were covered in a layer of dust and ash, having narrowly escaped the collapse with your life, and all he wanted to do after coming face-to-face with you on the battlefield was push you to your limit.
as always, though, he restrained himself. you won't give in like this. makarov has to play his cards right and take his time with you. he's unsure of the role you'll play in his grand plans, but there is one thing that he knows for certain: you'll be his greatest accomplishment yet.
you're already wavering, standing over the edge and staring into the abyss. all he has to do is convince you to take the leap.
he clenches his hand into a tight fist, savoring the pain that binds him to you. every matter is easier said than done, he reminds himself. you may teeter over the edge, but it's clear where your allegiances lie - with the captain, not him.
for a reason that he can't quite place, that angers him. it's to be expected— no amount of information given in good faith can make up for the fact that he's your enemy. even so, he feels like he deserves your fealty, your skills, your attention; the lack of it makes his skin crawl. it's a thought that refuses to leave his head, a pit that settles deep in his stomach and twists like a poison-tipped knife whenever he's reminded of it.
vladimir makarov does not chase. he does not ask for what he wants. nothing will change that, not even you. he'll find a way to make you seek him out. he doesn't care what it costs, both in funds and lives, it's all the same to him. it's only a matter of time.
a buzzing from his phone on his desk catches his attention. makarov approaches it in a lazy saunter and picks it up - with his uninjured hand - and reads off the name on the caller id. your real name flashes across the screen, staring back at him. a low chuckle escapes him before he answers the call and lifts the phone up to his ear.
"i'm surprised you've called so quickly." makarov concedes with an amused huff. "have you come to a decision?" he asks, cruel satisfaction swiftly displacing any of his prior emotions.
you inhale and exhale deeply, audible over the phone. he can imagine how you look— eyes held tightly shut, hand clenched into a fist at your side, your thoughts entirely consumed with him.
after a long moment of silence, finally, you speak.
"i have."
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