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theidiotwhowritesthings · 10 months

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TAKE CARE OF YOU [8B]

Sugar Daddy!Joel Miller x Female!Reader

Overall Warnings: slow burn, angst/comfort, power imbalance, age gap, possessive tendencies, eventual smut, #daddyissues, independent reader learns to let go and relax, emotionally constipated Joel Miller learns to be vulnerable; (more specific warnings to be added to individual chapters if necessary)

Chapter Word Count: 11,971

Summary: You spent your entire adult life supporting yourself and barely getting by. It’s why a life of ease offered to you by a mysterious stranger sounded so foreign and unbelievable. Joel Miller, dressed in flannels that had seen better days, didn’t look like the kind who could promise you the world on a plate, but he seemed desperate to help out. All he asks is that you let him take care of you. That wouldn’t be so hard. Would it?

[a/n: it's here, holy moly. I'm glad I split it up otherwise this would've been a 23k word chapter 😂 love all of you for reading though and double love the beautiful souls who leave me words of kindness!]

Chapter Specific Warning: masturbation (F), reader is a thirsty bitch (which like is totally fair considering Joel Miller is 🥵), fluff and my usual attempt at humor, angst (but like the 'please trust me as the writer babes' kind)

08: YOU'RE JOEL MILLER'S SUGAR BABY!

"in the mess of feelings, focus on what is important, what brings peace to your soul, and let all the rest go." -all is not lost

The room was sweltering. You were damp with sweat. It’s the first thing you notice when you slowly begin to awaken. The second thing you notice is the strong arm resting around your waist and the firm chest at your back. Your groggy sleep heavy mind reminds you that Joel and you had gone to bed not too long after you iced his hand for him. Granted, being tangled in his limbs was a new thing.

You took a deep breath and settled against him. Everything about this moment screamed comfort. The soft morning sunlight streaming through the window, the warmth radiating from Joel’s embrace, his soft breaths fanning against the back of your neck. You could spend eternity in his arms.

Your squirming hadn’t woken Joel, but his sleeping form shifted to match yours. Any leftover drowsiness you had vanished when you felt something firm press against your ass. It took you a beat to recognize what was pressing into you because there was no way it was what you thought it was. Joel gave off ‘big dick’ energy without a doubt, but this was significant enough that you had to be mistaken. You squirmed once more and Joel’s arm tightened around you, pulling you in closer, and there was no mistaking it now. The hard bulge pushing perfectly against you was his cock. Holy fuck. When Joel had said he was a ‘big man’ yesterday you thought it just meant his broad shoulders.

Joel let out a soft sigh, a content mumble, and in a panic you let your body go limp and closed your eyes once more. Seconds later, you felt Joel stiffen behind you⏤ sucking in a sharp breath through his nose. You kept your own breathing even and smooth as Joel stayed completely still. Finally, he slowly pulled his hips back, trying not to shift the mattress, and untangled his arm from you. You rolled over and continued to feign sleep.

“Jesus Christ.” Joel mumbled softly. You heard his soft steps padding across the room behind you, and you didn’t move until the bathroom door shut.

You rolled onto your back then and lifted your hands to cover your face.

Idiot, idiot, idiot. You chastised yourself. There was an ache in your core that you only had yourself to blame for. All these missed opportunities. You went to bed last night without kissing Joel. You woke up this morning and pretended to still be sleeping when Joel’s dick was literally pressed against your ass. The sound of the shower kicked on and your mind involuntarily conjured an image of Joel under a spray of hot water. The urge to slip your hand under your waistband and touch yourself was growing more and more overwhelming by the second.

After a glance to the door, your need shoved common sense to the back of your brain, trampling over it to get in control, and your hand slipped into your pants. This had to be fast and the absolute dripping desire you found told you that wouldn’t be tough to manage. You dragged your middle and ring finger up your wet lips to the apex where you let it curl around your clit in circular motions a few times. Your breath hitched and you pushed your fingers back down through your wetness to sink into yourself. With the memory of his cock pressed against you and his hot breath on your neck, you were already dangerously close to snapping. The pace you found with yourself was fast rather than the languid way you usually would pleasure yourself, and you let the heel of your palm grind against your clit. It was startling how quick and hard you came at your own hand with the image of Joel’s broad shoulders and rough hands in the forefront of your mind. The beginnings of a cry accidentally slipped from your lips and you bit down on the inside of your cheek to shut yourself up. Your hand lingered against yourself as you caught your breath and let the waves of pleasure ebb and flow over you.

The shower squeaked off and you sat up breathless, hand yanked out of your shorts. You could hear Joel moving around the bathroom and you struggled to calm your racing heart. As you shifted in place, trying to piece yourself back together, the feel of your now soaked panties was made more apparent and the back of your neck burned with a new warmth. You sent a silent prayer up to whatever deity may be listening that there wouldn’t be a noticeable damp spot on your sleep shorts when you stood.

Much sooner than you thought, the bathroom door opened and your spine stiffened to sit straight up with your hands resting in your lap. Joel stepped out, hair damp and slicked back, with a towel wrapped around his waist. His eyes landed on yours and widened, “Hey. Hey.” Joel cleared his throat and his hand fell to readjust the towel on his waist. “You’re awake.”

“Mhmm.” You hummed with a tight lipped smile. Joel stood in the doorway like a deer in the headlights and you felt a weird awkward tension. There was no way Joel heard you. Not over the sound of the shower. Plus, you were mostly quiet. The tension must be coming from somewhere else. You pointed your hand out toward him with a nod, “So, I didn’t kick you last night, right?”

Joel’s face cracked into an amused smile and he chuckled, “Not a bit. I’m impressed.” Joel came further into the room and nodded back toward the bathroom. “You need it? I can change out here.”

“Yes. Yes, please.” You slid out of the bed and tugged the edge of your shirt down a bit⏤ not that it helped in covering your shorts. Joel’s eyes trailed up your legs to meet your gaze and you tried not to feel self conscious in your morning state. Between the bed head and the state of your underwear, you felt like a spotlight was shining down on you.

Without pausing, you made a beeline to the bathroom. Before you got too far past Joel he caught you by the elbow and pulled you a bit closer. Your face burned warm under Joel’s stare. It was soft and warm, but underneath that was a hunger in his eyes that you were positive would remain burned into your memory forever⏤ haunting every dream you had of him. The corner of Joel’s lips twitched up. “I gotta say it proper.” He pinched your chin between his thumb and forefinger and traced the bottom curve of your lip. “Good mornin', sugar.”

“Uh, yeah.” You mumbled in a daze. Joel raised an eyebrow at you skeptically, and you shook your head with a small laugh. “I mean, good morning, daddy.”

“Good girl.” Joel approved. As if you hadn’t just touched yourself at the thought of him, you felt a new ache between your legs demanding attention. He tapped his fingers under your chin once and pulled away. “Go on. I wanna spend as much time with ya as I can 'fore I’m dragged away for work.”

You smirked and scrounged up every ounce of bold bravery you had in your body to reach out and set a hand on his bare chest. Joel sucked in a sharp breath and the look of hunger burned so hot you could’ve sworn you literally felt the heat on your skin. “You could always play hooky with me.”

“As temptin' as that is,” Joel cleared his throat and rested his hand on top of yours, allowing his thumb to rub against the back of your hand, “Tess'd literally castrate me if I skipped anythin' today.”

“Well, we can’t have that, now can we?” You teased before you even considered the words. Joel raised his eyebrows with a slight tilt of his head and your eyes widened at your own words. “I, uh, I mean,” You used your other hand to point to the suitcase, “I should… I need to get ready so we can… yupp.”

Joel squeezed your hand then lifted it up off your chest to press a soft kiss against the palm of your hand. At the simple touch, your entire body relaxed and you thanked that same deity you prayed to moments before that the hand you settled on his chest hadn't been the one you pleasured yourself with.

A part of you wondered if you were going to melt into a puddle right here and now. He nodded his head toward the bathroom with a small smile and let go of your hand. Your first step away from him was more or less a stumble. Joel chuckled and you scrambled to grab a swimsuit and cover from the suitcase before rushing away to compose yourself behind closed doors and out of view of those tempting, hungry eyes.

When you stepped out of the bathroom twenty or so minutes later, dressed for a casual day by the pool, you were met with quite the sight. Joel was in the process of putting on his watch, but his outfit was what caught your eye. Joel was going golfing apparently. He had on a pair of khaki slacks with an olive collared, short sleeve shirt tucked into it. The shirt was just tight enough to stretch across his broad shoulders and the sleeves clung tightly to his thick arms. A pair of sunglasses were hanging from his open collar.

“Hello, Tiger Woods.” You said appreciatively.

Joel glanced over briefly before doing a double take. His own eyes traced slowly down your form before confidently meeting your eyes once more. He chuckled, “Tiger Woods?”

“It’s the only golfer I know off the top of my head.” You replied and closed the space so you could reach out and run a hand down his arm. Joel’s eyes followed your hands' movements. “I like this look on you. Very preppy.” Joel’s gaze snapped to yours and he raised an eyebrow in question. You grinned impishly, “Golf Daddy.”

Joel laughed in amusement and shook his head. You looked around him to see his wallet was resting on the dresser by a black baseball cap. You frowned, “Are you gonna wear a hat?”

“Was gonna. Why?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never seen you in a hat before.” You shrugged. It just seemed a damn shame to hide Joel’s fluffy hair. Every time you saw him, you craved to drag your fingers through it. Not even in lust either. You just wanted to play with his wild slightly curled locks that seemed to have a mind of their own regardless of how Joel tried to shape it. Not to say you weren’t thirsty for this man. You also wanted to tug on his hair as he buried his tongue between your legs. The sudden and intrusive thought had a pang of desire cut through you. Jesus, at this rate you’d have to throw yourself into the pool head first just to cool off a bit. “Lemme see.”

Joel appeased your request and picked up the hat with an over exaggerated sigh⏤ as if you were asking him to carry the world. He pulled the cap on and tilted his head at you in question. Still doing whatever they seemed to want, his hair stuck out around the edges of the hat in half curls that you wanted to twist around your finger. “Well, sugar?”

“Okay. I guess I approve.” You grinned.

“Glad to hear it.” Joel reached out and set a hand on your waist to tug you a bit closer. “Ya know, I got a stetson at home. Does that meet your criteria or do I gotta get rid of it?”

You recognized the word and your eyes widened at the thought of Joel wearing an actual cowboy hat, “No, you don’t. You’re joking.”

“I’m from Texas.” He countered.

It was pathetic and sad the lengths you would go to see Joel Miller in a cowboy hat. The thought of Joel Miller in nothing but the cowboy hat flickered through your thoughts and you took in a slow breath. Fuck. Never mind throwing yourself in head first, you’d have to drown yourself in the pool to get these thoughts out of there. You cleared your throat, “I will allow it.”

“Really? Don't even gotta try it on for you or nothin'?”

“Well,” You shrugged, “I wouldn’t be opposed to a… a viewing.”

Joel chuckled and tapped his hand against your waist a couple times before grabbing his wallet and sticking it in his back pocket. He motioned for you to follow him. “C'mon.” You grabbed your phone and hurried after him. “You’re usin' up all our breakfast time droolin' over me.”

“I am not drooling over you!” You gave him a light push.

“Don’t worry.” Joel paused as you both neared the door and before you knew it his arm was wrapped around your waist to tug you into his side. He leaned down to whisper in your ear, “You got me all hot an' bothered too, sugar.”

Flustered and giddy, Joel whisked you away for breakfast.

The two of you ended up at the same little cafe as yesterday, but this time they were serving breakfast dishes rather than the more broad brunch option. Joel had apologized profusely for taking you to the same place since he didn’t have time to take you out of the resort to eat somewhere else. You found the whole situation hilarious because never in a million years would you have even thought to complain or be bothered by it. Hell, you didn't pay it a single thought until Joel brought it up.

“Can I ask for a favor?” Joel suddenly asked as the two of you left the cafe. Your eyes widened to a degree that you were sure was comical. All the time you spent with him, and he never asked you for a favor of any kind. Joel never requested anything. You were actually happy to hear him ask because you wanted to give him more.

“Anything, Joel.”

Joel chuckled but quickly cleared his throat. There was a look of anxiety written across his features, but when he spoke his voice still stayed strong and firm. “Stay in the Wynn today.” Despite broaching the topic as ‘asking for a favor’ there was a finality to his word that left no room for argument. “I’ll walk ya to the Wynn pool, I reserved a cabana there for you too, an' when you’re done just stay on campus.”

It wouldn’t be a difficulty. It wasn’t like you were being restricted to Guantanamo Bay⏤ this was the Wynn Resort in Vegas. There would be plenty to keep you occupied. You hesitated to respond to him though simply because you couldn’t puzzle out Joel’s expression. It wasn’t a difficult request, and yet Joel still had that nervous energy burning in his dark eyes. Almost as if he expected you to rebel against his request.

“Can I ask why?” Literally, there was nothing out of this building that interested you exploring as a solo errand, you came for Joel, but you were curious nonetheless.

“I hate the idea of leavin' you all alone.” Joel sighed. He readjusted the baseball cap on his head with a frown. “I really did try an' get outta this golf game, but Tess wouldn’ bite. Even Tommy was bitchin’ 'bout it.” He grumbled the last words with a tinge of annoyance.

You shook your head with a laugh and touched his arm. “Joel, it’s fine. I’m a big girl. I can find something to occupy my time until later today.”

“I know, but I brought you here to show you a good time, sugar.”

“You’re working. This is your job.” You tried to reassure him. Joel didn’t seem appeased, but he squeezed your hand and pulled you through the lobby. You leaned into his side with a smirk. “Besides, if you don’t go to work, how are you going to be able to afford to take care of me?” Joel’s face stretched out into a wide smile. His dimple was ever present and you couldn’t help but lift your free hand to poke him lightly in the cheek right over it making him chuckle. “I’m a needy girl.”

“You’re somethin' alright.”

“Something good?”

Joel rolled his eyes at your teasing smile and brought your hand up to kiss the back of it. “Somethin' absolutely incredible.”

Your cheeks warmed pleasantly at his words. Joel was so charming and forthcoming with his compliments, yet every single time he spoke your heart would flutter. You never tired of his words of praise, and it was probably because they were always said with so much sincerity and warmth.

Joel was walking you to the pool, you knew that, but you were surprised when he walked out of the building with you and into the pool area. He scooped up a couple towels when you passed the stand and then he led you to a cute, little cabana. It was close to the water so you wouldn’t have to travel far, but it looked like it sat on a more secluded side of the pool.

“Tonight, we have the work dinner, but afterwards we can go out.” Joel reassured in a firm tone. He had already told you about the dinner. It’d be a collection of other heads of companies and Joel warned you it would be dry and boring. “I promise.”

“I’m looking forward to dinner tonight.” You said and it wasn’t even a lie. He gave you a dry look. You shook your head and cupped his hand with both of yours to squeeze his. “I am!” You shrugged a bit in mild embarrassment as you admitted the truth. “I always look forward to spending time with you, Joel. No matter what we end up doing.”

Joel’s gaze softened, and you pressed your lips together and shrugged again not knowing what else to do. He chuckled and leaned forward until his lips found the skin right under your hairline. Joel lingered there and your eyes fluttered close as you took in a deep breath of him. The second he pulled away you were already missing his touch.

“I got my phone on me. You need anythin' at all, sugar, I’m one call away.”

You nodded and Joel lingered for a moment longer before making his leave. As you sat down on the chair outside the cabana, the towels he grabbed in your lap, you watched him go⏤ eyes raking up and down his frame unabashedly. When Joel reached the doors that would take him out of sight, he surprised you by turning around to give you one more glance. His gaze met yours and you spotted his smirk at the realization that you had been watching him go. You couldn't even find it in yourself to be embarrassed. Joel winked before slipping away and you flopped back onto the chair with a soft sigh.

God, you had it bad for that man.

You had come to Vegas for Joel, but you had to admit it was kind of nice to have some alone time. It had been a long time since you had sat by a pool and just soaked in the sun. Maybe a year ago now? Nathan and you had taken a trip to the beach one weekend. It wasn’t a bad trip. Hell, it was possibly one of the last times you were really happy with him. But, it was a far cry from where you were now. Sitting in one of the lounge chairs in the shallow end of the pool with a book in one hand and a drink in the other⏤ not a care in the world. That was the difference. Unlike the last time you sat by a pool, you weren’t thinking about work or rent or bills. You just enjoyed yourself.

“Hi, is this seat taken?”

You looked up from your book to see a woman pointing to the chair next to you. She was gorgeous with a white one piece that complimented her curves and her light brown skin tone. The woman wore a large sun hat with her black hair tied off in two braids.

“Oh, no. Go ahead⏤”

“Oh my god!” She chirped suddenly and you jumped in surprise at the squeal. She settled on the lounge chair but sat on the side of it so she could face you. “You’re that woman!”

You nodded blankly, “I am a woman, yes.”

She laughed and waved her hand. “My bad. Guess I should’ve been more clear. You’re Joel Miller’s sugar baby!” Your eyes widened and you just stared at her in shock. She paused in thought then snapped her fingers and said your name. This time your jaw dropped as the shock doubled. “You are her, right?”

“That…is me.” You replied slowly. You set your book and drink down on the side table and turned on the chair with a shake of your head. “I’m sorry. Who are you?”

“I go by Yo-yo.”

You pressed your lips together and glanced back at your drink. You only had the one pina colada so far, but it sure as hell felt you were wasted. What was going on? While you tried to puzzle out if you were having a stroke or not, Yo-yo settled in her chair and pulled a bit of sunscreen out of the bag she had set on her own side table.

“Yo-yo?” You questioned skeptically.

She glanced your way and rolled her eyes, “It’s a ridiculous name, right? I wasn’t about to use my real name. Plus, my sugar daddy liked it. You do what you gotta to get that bank.” She winked at you. “Am I right, or am I right?”

“I have so many questions.” You mumbled.

“Hm?”

“How do you know my name?”

“You're with Joel Miller. It's always a big deal. I mean, handsome bachelor, filthy rich, and that sexy accent and voice? Ugh.” Yo-yo groaned. “I am so jealous. My daddy is CEO of Simmons Construction. Very rich, but he’s 62 and it shows.” She finished rubbing sunscreen on her front and held the bottle out towards you with a sheepish smile. “Can I bother you with getting my back?”

You took the sunscreen and stood to rub it into her back like she asked. While doing so, you asked, “I know there’s this supposed ‘sugar baby’ network, but I’m not seriously this infamous am I? For you to know my name?”

“Normally, no.” You finished her back and she turned back around. You handed her the bottle. “But, not only did you nab the sexiest Texan to ever exist, but you also pissed off Rosalind Turby.” She laughed and you winced. Yo-yo shook her hand at you. “No, no! I’m not criticizing. I’m honestly impressed. Rosalind is such a cunt.”

Your eyes widened. “That woman is becoming a bigger part of my life than I thought she would.”

“Oh, if you stay in this game, baby, she’s your new god.”

“She’s that important?”

“Rosalind is Queen Sugar Baby.” Yo-yo rolled her eyes and pulled on a pair of sunglasses. “She’s been running this game for ages, and she’s very serious about her girls being the perfect ‘baby’. And if you’re not then she makes your life hell.”

You scoffed, “So, I pissed her off by not being a ‘perfect’ sugar baby?”

“No,” Yo-yo held up a finger to you, “You pissed her off because you took what she wanted.”

“Joel?” You cried. The woman had come to your bakery for her shot of him, yes, but you didn’t think she’d hate you enough to make you infamous around the community. “Seriously?”

Yo-yo pulled her glasses down the bridge of your nose to shoot you a wide grin and wink, “Can you blame her? God, Joel Miller has a face that was made to be ridden.” The weather was close to 100 degrees, you were cooking, yet still her words brought a whole new level of heat to your face. She pulled her sunglasses back up and moaned. “Girl, you have to tell me how good he is. There is not way he's anything less than fucking fantastic.”

The memory of his devastatingly large cock pressed firmly against your ass this morning made your breath hitch. Yo-yo continued to stare at you, as if waiting for you to elaborate on the dick you had yet to see, and you steered the conversation away. “So, do I need to worry about Rosalind showing up at my house with a meat cleaver?”

Yo-yo laughed, “Don’t worry about it. You’re not the only one on her shit list. She hates me too, and I’m not dead yet.”

“You too?” You asked. “Did you steal Simmons’ CEO from her?”

“Ugh, nobody wants that man. He’s basically satan. I’m doing the world a favor by keeping him away from other women.” She laughed. “No, no, she hates me because I technically ‘scam’ my daddies. Fucking ridiculous if you ask me.” She put the word in air quotations. “But, why shouldn’t I trick them? You can’t trust these men. They’re all just old pervs looking to wet their dicks.”

“Not all of them.” You said firmly. That wasn’t Joel. Yes, he was technically a sugar daddy, but that wasn’t what your relationship with him was.

Yo-yo held her hands up in mock surrender. She sat up and threw her legs over the side to face you once more. “Listen, you gotta look out for yourself. It’s easy to get lost in the relationship, especially if you’re actually attracted to the guy, but after a few daddies you realize they’re using you. So, why not use them? For example, Simmons buys me a lot of really nice things, but I don’t keep it all.” She smirked. “I sell it on the side. It’s barely even a scam considering he’s buying the stuff for me to have. That means I can do whatever I want with it. Daddies don’t like the idea of a baby saving up money for themselves though and Rosalind has a stick up her ass about it. But, hey, I got a nice little nest egg saved up for when Simmons decides 25 is too old for him and wants a younger girl.” She shrugged. “You should consider it. Purses and dresses and jewelry are all nice, but they won’t last.”

You twisted your lips at her words. Honestly, you thought what she was doing was smart. The situations between you were different though. Right? Joel cared about you. He wanted to take care of you. A sinking feeling filled your belly. Yo-yo suggested planning for the future, and realistically speaking… Did you even have a future with Joel? You were planning on initiating something, giving into the temptation that was Joel, but where would something like this go? You felt like there was real chemistry between the two of you, but that hardly meant he wanted you around forever.

“How…” You shook your head and hoped the negative thoughts would loosen and fall away. There was another question you had for her. “How were you so sure I was Joel’s sugar baby. He could've brought anyone with him.”

Yo-yo waved over a waitress. “Easy. We’re in Vegas for the same reason. To be shown off.” You furrowed your brow and she shot you a curious look. “You’re coming to the dinner tonight, right? With all the contracting bigwigs?”

“I…am.” You nodded.

“Good. I know the other two sugar babies that’ll be there and they take this ‘getting shown off by their daddy’ thing so seriously. It’ll be nice to have someone normal to talk to.” Yo-yo replied as the waitress reached you. “Yes, I’ll take a mai tai. You want anything? It’s on my daddy.” She smirked and wiggled a gold credit card in her hand.

“Sure, I’ll… take the same.”

Yo-yo continued speaking to the waitress and you settled back in your lounge chair. You and Joel were different. He didn’t bring you to Vegas to show you off. He brought you here to spend time with you. Granted, there was no reason he couldn’t do both. You shook your head. No, Joel’s intentions were pure. He took care of you, defended you, and he never once pressured you into anything you were uncomfortable with. Joel had given you no reason to doubt him.

“Joel didn’t bring me to show me off.” You said firmly once the waitress left. You wanted to defend him. Joel wasn’t like the guy she was with right now.

Yo-yo frowned and waved her hand at you. “I’m so sorry. I’m not trying to upset you, I swear. I don’t even know the man and obviously you do. Maybe he is the unicorn of sugar daddies. Caring and kind and genuine. Hell, I hope he is.”

“What we have is…” You almost said the word ‘real’, but you worried Yo-yo really would think you were just some doe-eyed, naive fool. “It’s different. I’ve never done this before, and neither has he, so we’re learning together. Just having fun and… What?” You noticed Yo-yo was giving you a look that could only be described as pity. “What? What is it?”

“Joel Miller has had a sugar baby before.”

You felt a chill run down your spine as you stared at her in dumbstruck shock. One of the things that put you at ease about this relationship was the fact that he was just as new to this as you were. The two of you sat in an awkward silence as the world continued on around you.

“Did he tell you that you were his first?” Yo-yo asked.

“No. Rosalind did.”

She nodded. “That makes sense. Rumor says the girl with Joel Miller was like us. Rosalind didn’t consider her legit.” You opened your mouth, but Yo-yo seemed to read your mind. “I don’t know much else. The only reason I know she exists is because when I was talking to a friend of mine about Rosalind's temper tantrum over you she mentioned this wasn't the first time Queen B lost her shit over Joel Miller.”

“That’s okay.” You mumbled.

Yo-you gave you a sheepish smile, “Hey, at least it wasn’t him who lied to you. That’s a good sign, right?”

Right. Joel never lied to you. But, it bothered you that he never mentioned it to you. Both of you discussed past relationships and he never brought up the fact that he had a sugar baby before you. In fact, the way he talked about how he was ‘lovingly bullied’ into this, and went on dates with other babies that didn’t go well, almost implied to you that you were his first. Yo-yo changed the subject, trying to cheer you up, and eventually the waitress returned with your drinks. You smiled and nodded when necessary in the conversation, but a part of your focus was still stuck on this news.

A doubt had been planted, and like a weed it’s roots crept deeper and deeper until it was anchored in place.

Yo-yo was fun. You liked her. In fact, you wished she didn’t live in Seattle because you would love to introduce her to Nima. They’d get along well. To a degree that was arguably dangerous to the LA region, but fun nonetheless.

You spent the entire afternoon with her and even got lunch with her when the sun became much too exhausting to bear for another second. She recommended a place on the strip that was renowned, but you stuck with your promise to Joel and asked if the two of you could stay in the Wynn. She wasn’t condescending or judgemental when you explained why. She actually agreed happily.

Overall, your day had been fun. The only issue being the lingering doubts about Joel. He texted you throughout the day. Little comments here and there either mocking the men he was with or asking how you were doing. Every sweet text reminded you of what Yo-yo said and then you felt sick with guilt over having anxiety about him to begin with. It was why you were dressed in your pajamas lying on your back in bed staring at the ceiling with your phone resting by your head.

“Listen,” Nima spoke through facetime, “You say the word, and I will use all my miles to fly out there right now and kick his ass for you.”

“Joel didn’t do anything wrong. He never lied to me. Rosalind did, technically.”

“He didn’t lie, but he also didn’t tell the truth.”

You shook your head, “He didn’t owe me that truth.” This was oddly working for you. Nima defended you while you defended Joel. Unorthodox, but that was kind of your life right now anyways. “Joel said he’d never lie to me and he hasn’t. That’s what matters.”

“Do you know any more about this other sugar baby? The one before you?”

You frowned at the phrasing and reminded yourself of the same things you were telling Nima now. Joel never owed you anything. There was no need for him to bring up the information, and you had never asked. You just assumed Rosalind was telling the truth and that was your first mistake.

“No.” You said. “Just that there was one, and Roaslind didn’t like her.”

“Okay, but at this point, have we met anyone that Rosalind does like?”

You shrugged, “Joel?” Nima laughed through the phone and your lips curled up at the sound. “Thanks for this, Nima.”

“Don’t thank me yet.” She said. You rolled over and picked up the phone to look at her. She was still in her office at work, but since it was already after five you assumed she’d be going home soon. “You can thank me after I beat the man senseless with a baseball bat.”

You shook your head, “He’s literally the boss of your boss, and you think kicking his ass is a good idea? It’s gonna be hard to keep your job after that, and I’m sure the letter of recommendation they gave you wouldn’t be all that grand.”

“Are you kidding?” Nima smirked at you confidently. “When you’re as good as I am at what you do then kicking your boss’ ass is absolutely an option. I get job offers on a weekly basis.”

“You’re such a badass.” You chuckled.

“I know.” Nima beamed. The sound of her office door opening made you pause and Nima glanced up from her phone to answer the question of whoever poked their head in. You sighed and let your head fall forward to rest on the bed. Joel would be back any minute now, and you should be getting ready for dinner. Before coming, back when you had been shopping, you asked Joel what kind of settings you had to dress for and he mentioned the dinner. With his help you had picked out a dress specifically for the dinner. At the time it seemed the usual amount of cute, but now your plaguing thoughts wondered if he helped pick it out because the whole point was to just show you off. “Babe?”

You lifted your head to see Nima was staring at you in concern. You offered her a sad smile, “I just wish I could turn my dumb brain off for like two seconds.”

“Your brain is not dumb.” Nima replied. “It’s smart and beautiful and kind and loving. It’s one of my favorite brains”

Your smile turned sincere, and you shook your head at her, “What would I do without you?”

“Well, for one, you’d have to buy your own baseball bat to beat Joel with.”

“I’m not beating him with a bat.” Nima opened her mouth and you cut her off. “And I’m not letting you do it either.”

The sound of the door chiming and being opened made you say quick goodbyes to Nima who forced you to agree to text her an ‘SOS’ if you needed her skills with a blunt object. She also took the time to assure you that she had a friend in Vegas who could definitely help hide a body.

“Hey, you here?” Joel’s voice called out.

You tossed your phone back onto the bed before making your way out into the main room. Joel had showered and changed out of his golf clothes after the game. You had still been poolside at the time. Then his afternoon was filled with work. He wore a plain dark gray, bordering on black, suit with a white shirt and a pink tie of all things.

“Pink?” You motioned toward him.

Joel readjusted the tie and gave a sheepish smile, “Fathers day gift from the girls. The color is a⏤ it’s an inside joke between us.” Joel nodded toward you with a furrowed brow. “Not that I’m complainin', 'cause I like the look, but pajamas aren’t really in the dress code tonight. Need some more time?”

“I uh…” You blurted with no prepared excuse in mind.

Whatever look you wore on your face though was enough to fill Joel’s with concern. Joel closed the few feet between the two of you and cupped your face. “You feelin' alright, sugar?” One of his hands crawled up to feel your forehead. “Sick?”

“No, I’m okay.” You shook your head. “I think I was just in the sun too long today.”

“Did'ya drink 'nough water by the pool?”

“I thought so.” You gave him a tight lipped smile. “Now, I’m wondering if that last pina colada should've been an ice water.” Joel returned the smile, but there was still worry in his dark eyes. “I’m sorry, Joel. I don’t know if I can do the dinner tonight⏤”

Joel shook his head, “Hey, don’ worry yourself 'bout that. Dinner doesn’ matter.” He gently tugged you toward the couch so he could settle you on the cushions. “Do ya need me to take ya to a doctor? I’m sure I can find an urgent care 'round here that’s open, and if not the hospital is⏤”

“Joel, no.” You said firmly. “Seriously. I’m just…tired, I think. I’m sorry.”

“Stop apologizin'.”

You twisted your lips in guilt. Joel was paying you to keep him company and you were bailing on the main event. He was paying you. You didn’t often think those words because it left a bitter taste in your mouth. Joel brushed some hair from your face.

“Can I get ya anythin' while I’m out?”

“No. I’m fine.”

“Alright.” Joel leaned down and pressed a kiss to your forehead. “You got your phone?” When you told him it was in the bedroom, Joel fetched it and brought it back to you. “Call me if you start feelin' worse. I’ll be back later.”

You nodded, “Good luck at the dinner.”

Another wave of guilt washed over you as you watched the door shut behind Joel. In this kind of situation most people would probably be angry. Nima was angry. You were so conflicted that you couldn’t even be angry correctly. You flopped back on the couch and lifted your phone. A bullet point list had been made to keep your thoughts straight when you met with Joel for the first time. Maybe a pros and cons list would help you decide if you wanted to be angry, guilty, or just sad.

Pro: Joel made you happier than you’ve been in a long time.

Con: He was paying you which made you more of an employee than a friend or lover.

Pro: Not having to worry about your bills has taken such a weight off your shoulders. One you didn’t even know you were carrying.

Con: That was a lot of power to give him. If you quit your job like he wanted too then you’d really be reliant on him.

Pro: You were beginning to feel real emotions for this man, emotions you thought your ex had destroyed.

Con: If Joel didn’t share those real emotions you were going to get really hurt.

Pro: You were beginning to believe he did truly care for you.

Con: You had no idea if you were mixing that up with a man just showing interest in his sugar baby.

Pro: A part of you was starting to be okay with the sugar baby status. Relationships sometimes had really weird starts. People had met in weirder ways.

Con: If you really weren’t his first sugar baby, then the question remained. What if you were just one of many? You were young and poor and willing to let him control your life. It could just be what gets him off?

You stared at the list in front of you for another beat before mumbling a string of curses. That had somehow confused you more. This would be easier if you could detangle your feelings from this. View Joel in the same way Yo-yo views her sugar daddy. A means to an end. This even allowed you to jump his bones. You had no qualms with the idea of casual sex. It was like Nima had pointed out though, your last relationship had been serious and monogamous. Despite that, you truly believed you could handle a casual relationship. The issue was you already had feelings for the man, and you were bad at ignoring that.

It was approaching close to an hour since Joel left and you were still agonizing over your pros and cons list while Netflix played in the background, and you were half tempted to call Nima again. You only resisted because you knew if you called her again she’d take that as an invitation to meet you in Vegas ready to go to war. The sound of the door chiming startled you and you were half off the couch in panic when Joel stepped through.

“Hey, how’re you feelin'?” He asked. You stared at him blankly. In one hand he had a large brown bag and in the other a small bouquet of sunflowers in the other. “Sugar?”

“Joel!” You blurted and rose off the couch to greet him. “What’re you… The dinner! It can’t possibly be over yet.”

“Never went.” Joel set the bag on the nearby table and held the flowers out to you. “I asked the lady what flowers meant ‘feel better soon’ 'nd she said tulips, yellow roses, or sunflowers. Choice was obvious 'nough.” You took the bouquet and held them to your chest⏤ still speechless in shock. “Then I went to pick us up some food. It only took me so long 'cause of Vegas traffic an' I had to go off the strip to find a place.”

“But… But dinner?”

Joel grinned boyishly with a glimmer of excitement in his eyes, “My options were go to a stuffy dinner with guys I got no interest in seein', or have a night in with you.” He began to loosen his tie. “C'mon, sugar.”

You blinked at him. “Tess?”

“Will probably kill me.” Joel pulled the tie off with a shrug and gruffly added. “But she wants to kill me most days anyways.” He nodded to the bedroom. “Gimme a minute. I’m dyin' to get out of this damn suit.”

Joel tapped under your jaw with the side of his fist before heading to the bedroom. Even after he disappeared from view you stood frozen for another few seconds. Finally, you snapped out of it and walked over to the table. You set the flowers down and peeked into the bag to see the to-go food he mentioned. Carefully, you unpacked the bag and after the second box you realized it was Korean food. You froze again and felt a lump form in your throat. A while back, during a late night phone call, you had mentioned to him that Nima introduced you to Korean food by taking you home to meet her mother, and it had easily become a comfort food to you too. There was a Korean place a few blocks down from you where you’d pick up food on your way home on particularly bad days.

“I tried to order the soup you were talkin' 'bout, but you used the Korean word for it an' I sure as hell wasn’ gonna pronounce that right.” Joel spoke up from behind you. You spun to see him leaning against the doorway in a plain t-shirt and pajama pants. “So, I just described it to the woman an' she gave me the closest thing. Seaweed soup?” You nodded dumbly. “Good. Just in case I ordered a bunch of other stuff too.”

Suddenly, the pros and cons list you made didn’t matter all that much to you. Because right now, in this moment right here, Joel cared louder than the anxiety yelling in your brain. You dated Nathan for two years and he outwardly told you that he loved you. But before the two of you moved into together, when you had separate apartments, you paid for his rent when he lost his job, yet when you needed help covering your water bill once he claimed he wasn’t comfortable giving you so much money that early in the relationship. So much money being $100. When you asked him about one of his exes not only did he blatantly lie to your face about the last time he had seen her and after you found out he forced the three of you to get dinner together to prove whatever stupid point he was trying to make. And, right before you broke up, when you had caught the flu and begged him to pick you up some food from the place down the road, he refused because he said he didn’t like the smell of kimchi and didn’t want to go into the restaurant.

Your eyes filled with tears and Joel’s face fell. He pushed off the door frame in a hurry and pulled you into his arms. You buried your face into his chest and tried to bite back a sob. Joel soothingly cupped the back of your head, “Hey, you okay? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” You murmured into his chest and shook his head. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be crying.”

Joel shushed you softly and pulled you back so he could meet your gaze, “None of that. It’s okay. You’re okay.” His hand cupped under your jaw as his thumb traced back and forth on the skin there. “Talk to me, sugar.”

You stared into his eyes and felt nothing by safety and warmth. “I’m just really thankful for this. For you. Just… Thank you so much. You have no idea how much this means to me, Joel.”

Joel’s lips curled into a soft smile, “What have I said 'bout thankin' me for things I wanna do?”

Rather than answer, you just held his gaze. Joel did the same and the air between the two of you felt charged. There was always an energy bubbling anytime you were with Joel, but this was stronger⏤ more tangible. His eyes darted down to your lips then back up. Joel was going to kiss you. You were so sure of it. When his eyes darted down to your lips again you let them part. Anticipation electric on your skin. Joel sucked in a sharp breath. He leaned in, but his lips didn’t land where you thought they would. Joel set a kiss on your forehead, right above your eyebrows, and lingered there.

He had kissed your forehead before, did so right before he left an hour ago, but this was more intimate somehow. Your eyes fluttered closed and you took in a slow breath before letting it out. Joel pulled his warm lips away from your skin and let his own forehead rest against yours.

Your eyes stayed closed as you soaked in the feel of his hot breath against your skin and a pang of disappointment shot through you. “Joel…”

“I know.” Joel’s voice was hoarse and rough. “I… I know.”

Slowly, you let your eyes open and found Joel with his eyes already on you. “It’s okay.”

“You are…” Joel locked his jaw and closed his eyes.

There was something holding him back. You saw it written all over his face. Maybe you should worry that this had something to do with what Yo-yo had tried to tell you. Ten minutes earlier and you would’ve. Your anxiety would have grabbed hold of it, written it in bold on your cons list, and never left it alone. But, right now you felt at peace. That’s what Joel brought with him⏤ a sense of peace and calmness to your very soul. And that’s what you wanted to bring to him. You wanted to take care of him.

Your hands lifted to cup his face and when his eyes opened you gave him a bright smile. “If we don’t eat now the food’s gonna get cold.” His jaw relaxed and he murmured your name. Just as he did to you, you nodded, “I know.”

Joel cleared his throat and caressed your face once more before nodding, “Come on. Let’s get some food in you, pretty girl.”

While Joel finished pulling out the food, you set the sunflowers in a vase that was probably only meant for decoration and filled it with water. A glance over your shoulder showed Joel setting the food up on the coffee table in front of the couch.

“I put the wine from last night in the mini fridge if you wanna grab it.”

“Yeah, sure.” You made your way over and grabbed two glasses while you were doing so. “I gotta see what bribe wine tastes like.”

Joel turned and shot you a skeptical look, “Bribe wine?”

“The Wynn gave you the expensive wine to bribe you into not telling all your rich friends that you and your guest got accosted in the casino.”

He shook his head, “That is not bribe wine.”

“Why are you so sure?” You set the wine glasses down on the table and began to look for the corkscrew. “Do you dabble in bribe wine often, Mr. Miller?”

Joel groaned, “Don’ you start with this Mr. Miller shit.”

“Why not?”

“Because last I checked,” Joel stepped closer as you used the corkscrew you found in a drawer to begin opening the wine, “You’re supposed to be callin' me somethin' else.”

You gave the cork a tug, but it didn’t budge. “Hm, I can’t possibly think of what.”

“Oh, you can’t?” Joel remarked. You shook your head and gave the cork another useless tug. He took the wine bottle from you and, without breaking eye contact, Joel popped the cork out with ease. You went to grab it from him, but he pulled it back with a tilt of his head. “Manners, sugar.”

The worst case scenario would’ve been an awkward air settling in the room around you after coming so close to kissing him only for it not to happen. That being said, Joel slipped right back into the familiar teasing and that made you sigh happily. You held your hands out, “Thank you, daddy.”

“Good girl.” Joel chuckled and let you take the bottle from him. As you poured into the two glasses, Joel scooped up the remote and sat down. You dropped down next to him and handed him his glass. He tapped it against yours. “Any requests?”

“I’m not picky. You can choose.” You took a sip of the wine then hummed. “Mmm, this bribe wine tastes amazing.”

Joel laughed but didn’t take his gaze away from the screen as he flipped through different options, “You’re impossible, ya know that?”

He picked a random Netflix original action movie titled ‘Triple Frontier’ and tossed the remote aside. The movie played in the background, but the two of you ended up talking through a lot of it as you pointed out different foods that Nima had introduced you to originally and he had picked up. When the meal had been finished, you were curled into his side still sipping wine half chatting and half watching the movie.

A moment of silence rose up between the two of you and after a second you filled it, “About the dinner I made you miss⏤”

“First off, you didn’ make me do anythin'.” Joel scoffed. “An' secondly, I swear to God, if you apologize again…”

You chuckled, “Okay, I won’t apologize, but we’re in Las Vegas, the city that never sleeps, and I have us sitting on the couch watching a Netflix movie.”

“This right here is literally my definition of a perfect night.” Joel shook his head at you.

You leaned against his shoulder and decided to mention your afternoon, “I, uh, I met one of the sugar babies that was gonna be at the dinner tonight.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah. She goes by Yo-yo.”

“Doesn’ ring a bell…”

“I think she said her sugar daddy is Simmons? Of Simmons Construction?”

Joel groaned loudly and hung his head backward, “Jesus, Simmons? Girl gotta be a saint to put up with that bastard.”

“She did refer to the man as ‘satan’.”

Joel lifted his head and smirked at you, “See? You saved me from a night with satan.” You chuckled. “Zero reason to be apologizin’. I should be thankin' you.”

“I think it’s a shame I didn’t get to meet him.” You hummed. “It sounds like quite the experience.”

Joel sighed and took a long sip from his wine glass, “Yeah, well, there’s always next year, sugar.”

Your eyes widened at his words, but Joel didn’t even blink. It was like he hadn’t even realized what he just said⏤ what he inferred. That you’d be here next year. With him still. You shifted your gaze back to the TV and smiled to yourself.

After another few quiet moments, you pointed toward the TV with your glass, “That guy looks like you.”

“Him?” Joel asked skeptically. You nodded in confirmation. “I’m better lookin' though right?”

“Of course, daddy! So much better looking.” You nodded.

Joel chuckled and reached down to pinch your side making you squeal and nearly spill your wine, “Right answer, wrong tone, ya little brat.”

You settled back against him, and Joel didn’t hesitate to tuck you in under his arm.

When the movie ended, Joel clicked on whatever the first suggested movie was so something was still playing, but neither of you paid enough attention to even know the title. The hand behind your shoulder was drawing circles on your shoulder while telling you about how excited he was that his eldest daughter was coming to visit soon.

“Do you have something fun planned?”

“We gotta tradition where we go to the drive in theater. No matter what’s playin'. Just sit in the bed of the truck an' hang out.”

You grinned, “That sounds fun.”

“It is.” Joel nodded and grew silent in thought. You thought he’d follow his last statement up with something else about the girls, but he caught you off guard with something else. “I wanna kiss you so bad, sugar.”

It was a good thing you had already set down your glass of wine otherwise it would have slipped right out of your hands. You sat up so you could turn in place and face him on the couch. Joel’s eyes traced your features with a sigh. Slowly, you nodded, “Do you… Do you want to talk about why you haven’t?”

“I’m jus',” Joel lifted his hand and caressed your jawline with his thumb, “Tryin' real hard to be good.” You opened your mouth to argue that he didn't have to be, but Joel pressed the pad of his thumb against your bottom lip to stop you before a word even came out. “Nah, I gotta. I gotta be good.” He forcibly dragged his eyes up from your lips to your eyes. “I like what we got. I like this. If I do somethin' to fuck it up, I’ll never forgive myself.”

“And giving me just a little kiss is gonna do that?”

Joel’s lips curled into a melancholic smile, “I think you an' I both know if we start it ain’t gonna be just some little kiss, baby girl.”

It was the first time he had used that pet name towards you and you just melted. If he was trying to steer the both of you away from temptation, calling you ‘baby girl’ was not helping. “How do you know that this won’t just get better?” It kind of stung realizing the reason he stopped earlier was because he thought a physical relationship would ruin this. “Why do you assume that would fuck this up? I⏤”

“No.” Joel said firmly and he squeezed his hold on the side of your face at the same time for even more emphasis. “Not you. What I jus' said? I’m talkin' 'bout me. Me fuckin' it up. It comes from… from personal experience.”

You wanted more information. You wanted him to explain more. You wanted to ask him about the sugar baby that came before you. Was that the personal experience he was talking about? All those thoughts, and you somehow couldn’t get a single one out of your damn mouth.

“I’m only bringin' this up 'cause I don’ want you confused.”

“Confused about what exactly?”

“'bout how much I want you.” Joel replied. You attempted to swallow the forming lump in your throat, but it didn’t help. “I jus' wanna do right by you, sugar. An' that…that’s just gonna take a little time, okay?” You gave him a small nod. “Can we jus' stay what we are in the meantime? If… If you don’t wanna wait for me to get my shit together, if you wanna walk, I understand.”

“No. I’ll wait.” You blurted. The thought of Joel leaving your life was too painful to even consider. The man had carved a slot in your life, and his absence would be noticed⏤ not just financially speaking either. If you walked away, you would miss him badly. Waiting was hardly a cost you had to think twice about. Especially, since you’d still have him in the meantime. Maybe not in the entire way you wanted him, but beggars couldn’t be choosers. “If it means being with you, then I’ll happily wait.”

Joel pressed a chaste kiss to your temple before pulling you into a tight hug that you returned without hesitation. This wouldn’t be easy, but it was worth the effort. You pulled back and suggested changing the movie from whatever was playing to something the two of you would actually pay attention to, best of your ability at least, and Joel agreed. He grabbed the remote and pulled you into his side. The two of you were only a few options into the discussion when someone knocked on the door⏤ loud enough that it could probably be referred to a ‘banging’ rather than simply knocking.

“Did you order something?” You asked.

“No.” Joel rose cautiously and held a hand out for you to stay on the couch. There was a tension in his shoulders that worried you.

He only took a step forward when a female voice drifted faintly through the shut door, “Miller, I swear to Christ if you don’t open this goddamn door…”

Joel muttered a curse but his entire frame visibly relaxed. He glanced over his shoulder while approaching the door. “Whatever she says, jus' know I’m sorry for it.” You furrowed your brow at his words, but he explained no further. Joel tugged the door open and a brunette haired woman stormed in. Her light shade of hair was pulled back into a low, loose bun. A style thrown together just to keep it out of her face more than likely. She was around Joel’s age, if you had to garner a guess, and she wore a black form fitting dress that looked incredible on her, but you could see she wasn’t entirely comfortable in it. “Tess⏤”

“You son of bitch.” Tess pointed at him threateningly. She was shorter than him by a head, but Joel still reeled back with his hands held in mock surrender. “See? Can’t even fight back because you know you’re in the fucking wrong.”

“I’m sorry⏤”

“You know who I spent my night with?”

“Tess⏤”

“Putting up with Simmons, Crew, Han, and their trio of bimbo sugar babies.” Tess snapped. You frowned. Yo-yo was hardly a bimbo, she confided in you the reason she was saving up all that money was because she wanted to go back to college and then on to Law School, but she also told you she played it dumb around Simmons so you couldn’t fault Tess’ words. “All so you could⏤”

As if suddenly remembering why Joel had bailed, her light hazel eyes snapped to you. You stiffened awkwardly and not knowing what else to do, you lifted a hand in a pathetic wave, “Uh, hi.”

Tess stared at you for another beat before letting her eyes drag back to Joel in a look you could only describe as irritably smug. “Well⏤”

“Tess.” Joel snapped with fire in his voice. You finally looked away from Tess to glance at Joel. He was stiff again and you recognized the look of anger on his features with ease. “Don’t.”

Tess crossed her arms and scoffed, “Go get dressed. You’re getting drinks with the pricks.”

“I’m what?”

“I spent the last three hours pretending like I didn’t want to stab Simmons in the neck with my dinner fork.” Tess warned. “The least you can do is get that pretty little ass in a suit and go get one drink with him so you can discuss the Golden Plains plans.”

Joel locked his jaw and didn’t reply. Tess didn’t say anything further either. The two just glared at one another. She was sharp and cool ice while he felt like a wild and burning fire, yet it felt like an immovable object meeting an unstoppable force. Finally, Joel huffed angrily and shook his head.

“C’mon.” He grunted at you. He held his hand out as he walked toward the bedroom.

You began to stand, despite not loving the rough, grumbled command, but Tess shook her head. “No sugar babies allowed, per Simmons. Just the big boys for cigars and drinks.”

“What makes you think I give two shits what Simmons wants??”

“Play fucking nice, you ass.” Tess snapped. “You owe me.”

“Because you did your job at one dinner? I⏤”

“San Antonio 2019.”

Joel paused and scoffed, “Never let me live that fucking down.”

He waved his hand at her in irritation before disappearing into the bedroom. You heard the bathroom door slam shut and you jumped in place. The sound had been enough to remind you that you were now alone in a room with Tess. Slowly, you turned toward her to see she was already staring at you with the cold look she had pierced Joel with.

“Hi.” You said sheepishly and offered her a nervous smile. You introduced yourself, “Joel has told me a lot about you. I⏤”

“You two fucking?” Tess blurted. Your face burned and you opened your mouth to splutter out the beginnings of the answer, but she shook her head. “Guess not considering I’m finding you both on the couch fully clothed.”

You set your hands on your hips and cleared your throat, “I think we got off on the wrong foot.”

“Don’t care if we did.” Tess replied. She marched closer and you had to resist the urge to scramble back from the incredibly intimidating woman. “Listen to me right now because I’m only giving you this warning once.” Tess crossed her arms. “The Miller brothers get these dumb fucking ideas in their head, but once they pick one they’re like a dog with a bone. Can’t get them to shake it.” She narrowed her eyes at you. “I told him I thought this was a stupid ass idea, but like I said⏤ dog with a fucking bone.”

“Look, I⏤”

“I’ve known Joel for twenty years.” Tess said firmly. “He’s family. Him, the girls, his idiot ass brother. I’ve been taking care of them from the start and I don’t do well with strangers stepping in to take advantage.”

Your eyes widened and you shook your head, “No, no. This is a misunderstanding. I am not taking advantage of Joel.”

“So you paid for half this trip to Vegas?”

“Uh, no, but⏤”

“And he’s not paying all your bills?”

“Well⏤”

“Footing the cost of every single⏤”

“Hey.” You snapped to interrupt her and Tess’ eyes widened marginally in surprise. You swallowed nervously. Nima knew a friend that could help you hide a body, but there was something about Tess that told you she could drag you out to the desert alone and figure it out herself. “Yes, he is taking care of me, but it’s not just… I care about him. A lot. Joel means so much to me. I’m not just here to make ends meet. I really like him.”

Tess hummed, “Right. You’re one of those rare sugar babies who like a guy for their personality and not their wallet?”

“Well,” You cracked the most friendly smile you could muster to try and break the tension, “It helps he’s gorgeous.” Tess continued to glare at you, and you were tempted to throw a chair through the suite window and leap out just to avoid her stare. Granted, she looked close to just throwing you out herself. “Bad joke. Very bad joke. That was⏤ I’m sorry. When I get nervous my mouth just says things without my permission.”

It was painfully silent in the room as she just stared at you. You cleared your throat and just stood there awkwardly. Finally, Tess spoke up, “You step one toe out of line, and you will regret it. Do I make myself clear?”

The sound of the bathroom door opened and you nodded. “Crystal.”

Joel stepped back out wearing the suit he had earlier, but without the tie. The top few buttons of his shirt were messily hanging open and he didn’t bother fixing his tousled hair. Tess rolled her eyes at him, “Finally. Let’s go.”

“Just hang on.” Joel walked toward you.

“Miller⏤”

“Give me two fuckin' seconds, Tess.” Joel snapped.

Tess scoffed and marched out of the room into the hall without a passing goodbye in your direction. Joel finally reached you and his warm hands cupped your arms. You focused back on him and the softness you had grown used to had returned in his gaze. “So, she hates me.”

“No.” Joel shakes his head. “She don't.”

“You weren’t in here with us a minute ago, I think she might try and kill me.”

Joel chuckled and dragged a hand up past your shoulder to cup the side of your neck. “Tess is just… protective. A bull dog.”

You furrowed your brow, “She compared you to a dog too a second ago.”

“Huh?”

“Never mind.”

Joel kissed your forehead, “I don’ know when I’ll be back so don’ wait up for me, 'kay? Same deal as last time. You need anythin' an' you jus' shoot me a text. Do not leave this room or let anyone in while I’m gone.” You nodded, but Joel wanted more than that. “Understood?”

“Yeah, I got it.” You agreed.

Joel brushed his thumb against your cheek in a caress once more before wishing you a good night and leaving. With both of them out of the room, you felt like you were finally catching your breath.

Vegas had been a whirlwind, but you supposed that was the appeal of the city to so many. Your hand was tangled with Joel’s as the two of you slowly walked through the lobby. Your bags had already been packed and brought down to the car by the staff. Now the two of you were just lingering for the sake of lingering. Joel told you more about the annoying time he had last night⏤ he hadn’t managed to get back until just past midnight.

You focused on the drag of his thumb against the back of your hand as he spoke. As much as you hated to admit it, you only half paid attention to the words he was saying. Your mind was playing through your meeting with Tess line by line. There was something nagging at you.

Joel squeezed your hand suddenly and you snapped your gaze to see him looking beyond you. He nodded, “She’s callin' you.”

“Huh?” You glanced over your shoulder to see Yo-yo waving to you as she hurried over. She wore a white cocktail dress that clung to her skin. Her hair was curled in pretty wave. “Oh, Yo-yo, hey.”

“I am so glad I caught you!” Yo-yo squealed and pulled you in a tight hug despite your hand still being connected to yours. “Ugh, I missed you so much last night. Can’t believe you bailed on me!”

“Sorry, I wasn’t feeling good.” You motioned to Joel. “Yo-yo, this is Joel Miller. Joel, this is Yo-yo. She’s the one I met by the pool yesterday.”

“It’s super nice to meet you, Mr. Miller.” Yo-yo replied in a musical tone.

Joel grunted in agreement with a curt nod. You gave him a curious glance, but he met your gaze. He nodded once, “Stay. I’ll get the car.”

“Oh, okay.” You replied. Joel pulled his hand from yours and wandered away. You furrowed your eyebrow in slight confusion.

Yo-yo chuckled and her tone lost the bubbly tone to return to her baseline normal one, “Wow. He is just as stoic and grumpy as everyone says.” You opened your mouth to argue. Technically, neither of those words described the man you spent your days with, but you couldn’t deny they fit him in the few seconds with Yo-yo here. “Also, he seriously is stupid hot. God. His jawline just makes me wanna gnaw on it. Shame he’s kind of a sleaze ball.”

“I don’t even know what that means⏤ wait, what?” You shook your head as the final part of her statement dawned on you. “What did you just say?”

Yo-yo twisted her lips in a frown, “I seriously am glad I caught you. I mean, I was gonna call you regardless, but this is probably better in person.”

“Yo-yo, spit it out.” You snapped.

“I did some digging last night when Simmons was out. Called a few girls I actually trust.” She sighed. “Best I’ve gathered, the sugar baby he had before you? Her name is Heather. Granted, I have no idea if that’s her real name or not since a good bit of us lie about that.” Yo-yo reached out to hold your elbow. “Anyways, my friend Tammy says the last time Heather bragged about seeing him was around four months ago.”

You blinked in shock. Four months? That was even less time considering you and Joel had been hanging out for almost a month and a half now. Worse, if it were true that meant Joel lied to you. He said his last relationship had been a year ago.

“That’s not the worst part…” Yo-yo said slowly.

“That’s not…” You lifted a hand to your face. You didn’t mean to snap at her, but it came out in frustration and confusion. “How exactly does it get worse, Yo-yo!?”

She hesitated a beat before sighing. Yo-yo said the words, you saw her mouth move and the words entered your skull, but they rattled around in a way that left your ears ringing. Yo-yo was saying your name in concern, but you were still trying to register her previous statement.

“He married her. Joel is a married man.”

Yeah. Yo-yo was right.

That was worse.

taglist (closed):

@weddingfairy @bfences @fairntonorth @jasminedragon @biwitchy @huffle-punk @shelbyteller @anoverwhelmingdin @aheadfullofsteverogers @stagerightlauren @basicoccult @rinnfey @boofy1998 @farintonorth @thepascalofus @amatis-gray @casa-boiardi @northernbluess @jettia @sapphicsoie @spidey-3 @camiali25 @hrtsforpascal @gingersince97 @sentients17 @bigboiseason123 @lunxramour @ktheunready @heyheyheygaypay @keepingupwiththeskywalkers @adoringanakin @come-hell-or-eldren-fire @cherriebat @whitewolfstar01 @alyssa121611 @asreadbyaj @painfullyandprettypoetic @cantobightcafe @hellooseulgi @str84pedro

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#tlou fanfiction #the last of us fanfiction #joel miller #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #sugar daddy!joel miller #sugar daddy!joel miller x reader #female reader #reader insert #the last of us #joel miller smut

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wolfvmin · 1 year

Text

House of Cards

pairing: chishiya shuntarou x fem!reader genre: angst (i love angst i'm sawry), unrequited love (but is it really), pining wc: 6.1k warnings: niragi, spontaneously written at 2am and under the influence, chishiya is emotionally constipated, is chishiya ooc here idk summary: in which you've known chishiya before borderlands and he isn't so fond of seeing you at the beach ao3 link > PART 2

The first person you saw after the first game at the Beach was Usagi. You ran to her as soon as you saw her by the pool.

“Have you seen Arisu?” She asks you as soon as you let go. You shake your head in worry, your head immediately looking around and searching the crowd for the familiar shaggy mop of hair.

“There!” She exclaims and you both push through the crowd to get to him. He sees both of you approaching and screams your names in delight.

“Arisu!” You grin as you approach him. You immediately wrap your arms around him. He pats your back.

“You’re both alive.” He lets out a sigh of relief. You nod and let him go.

He and Usagi stare at each other with shy smiles, making you roll your eyes. You stood in between them awkwardly.

“Please just hug it out. I’m practically begging at this point. I wish the game just killed me if I knew I will have to see this shit.” You cross your arms and walk away from both of them while both of them follow you, no doubt still shyly smiling at each other while talking.

You sat on one of the pool chairs and Usagi sat on the edge of your seat. Arisu sat on the other chair beside yours.

“Ann was trying to test me,” Arisu says as he sat down on the edge of the beach chair, talking about the game he was in.

“When in Rome, do as the Romans do,” Usagi replies while you nod in agreement.

A girl in a blue patterned two-piece swimsuit enters your space and sits beside Arisu. She was tall, pale, and pretty and with some kind of stick in her mouth. The three of you follow her with your gazes.

“Your girlfriend?” She asks and nods at Usagi. She was talking to Arisu.

“What?” Arisu reacts, clearly caught off-guard.

You roll your eyes again but watch the exchange with a grin.

“You’re wrong,” Usagi denies.

“You clearly like each other. Why not date?” Kuina shrugs and then continues. “You’re never gonna know when you’re going to die.”

Whatever Arisu, Usagi, and the new girl were talking about, you tune it all out with your thoughts.

It was harsh but true. People always say, if the world was ending, they’d live to the fullest. In Borderlands, every day is your last day. You think back to Chishiya. If he was here, how would he treat you? Pain struck your chest at the thought.

Will he ever look at you the way Arisu looks at Usagi? All this time, you’ve been hanging on to your life hoping you’ll return to him. But is it worth it? Will he even like it when you come back?

“What about you?”

The girl looks at you with expectant eyes.

“What was that? Sorry, I zoned out.”

“You got someone to go back to the original world? I’m Kuina, by the way.” She gives you a sweet smile.

You nod, thinking of the nonchalant platinum blonde. “Yeah. I think so.”

She was about to ask more when a loud voice halts the entire celebration.

“Hey, stop playing that tacky music!”

Armed men enter the area. You recognize some of them as the men who tied you up when the three of you were caught spying on The Beach. Everyone stops partying upon their arrival, you even see some holding their breath.

“It’s the militants,” Kuina explains to the three of us. “If you want to live a peaceful life at the Beach, avoid getting involved with them.”

She begins to explain who the militants are and what they do. The muscular man named Aguni is their leader. They’re who are in power on the Beach along with Hatter and his devotees. A conflict could happen between the two groups at any time. You don’t doubt it. Such two different powers will clash inevitably.

Aguni and his militants stop by the four of you. He was looking at Arisu who avoided his gaze.

“What happened to your friend?” The question was for Arisu again. You raise a brow. You’re beginning to notice a lot of people knowing Arisu. He must’ve been in a game with the man back when he was with his friends.

Arisu stayed silent, a glimpse of his defeated self, lying on the ground passing by you.

“I see. He died.” Aguni states the obvious. “What a shame only the small fish survived.”

You frown at the clear insult to your friend.

“Do you know each other?” Kuina whispered to Arisu.

Aguni then flits his dark gaze to Usagi and then to you. You suddenly felt naked in your black two-piece swimsuit. But it’s not like you to cower. So you look back at him with the same dark but angry gaze.

“You,” he points at the arrogant-looking man with the gun over his shoulder. “Bring those women over.”

The man quickly moves to his feet, about to grab Usagi first. Arisu stands up in a heartbeat, shouting his protest.

“Stop it. Don’t get involved!” Kuina holds his arm as he stands up.

Usagi stays planted in her seat and you stand up, fists in anger and on your sides.

“Our boss said he wants a taste of both of you.” He says with an ugly smirk on his face. With you being closer, you could see the multiple piercings on his face. You feel nothing but disgust for this man.

The man grabs Usagi’s arm again and both Arisu and you stop him.

“Stop it,” Arisu repeats, standing in front of you and Usagi.

“What? Had to have two chicks to yourself? Don’t you know sharing is caring?” He asks Arisu and then asks Aguni. “What should we do about this guy?”

“Break his legs so that he’ll die in the next game.”

Your eyes widen at the words of the militants’ leader. You quickly felt fear for your friends. God, is this really gonna happen to the three of you?

The pierced man orders the militants to bring the both of you to Aguni while he grabs Arisu.

The tattooed man with a sword approaches you and grabs you by the arm.

“Fucking let me go.” You struggle against his hold, tugging your arm from his digging grasp.

Arisu escapes the pierced man’s hold and is about to head back to the both of you when the militants block his way. He can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You were outnumbered and no one will save you.

You stare down the bald tattooed man, not letting him see your fear.

You look around, desperate for an opening or an idea to save the three of you. The people only look at the situation closely.

There was only one name in your mind. Chishiya. You have to get out of here for Chishiya. You have to make it out alive somehow.

“Is this a fight?”

The crowd made a way and came in the Beach’s number one, Hatter.

“Back off Hatter, this doesn’t concern you,” Aguni spoke up.

“I can’t do that. As Number One, I’m obliged to maintain order at the Beach.” He says dramatically, looking afar. Then he looks at the militants once again. “Can you let off the newcomers in my account, Aguni?”

All of the residents of the Beach watch as the tension between the two leaders rises. It was Hatter who first breaks the stare down and looks at the pierced man.

“Niragi?” He directs the question to him. So his name is Niragi, you thought. It’s best to avoid him. He reeks of danger and you are seldom wrong about your intuition.

Niragi looks away. “I only take orders from my boss.”

Hatter clearly takes offense at the man’s answer and looks at Aguni again with dark eyes. “Then let me ask your boss.”

He stares down at Aguni again, faces inches away from each other. “Who’s your boss, Aguni?”

Aguni doesn’t look at Hatter, staring ahead in anger. Then he turns to face Hatter. Everyone waits for the tough-looking man’s answer.

“It’s you, right?”

Hatter seemed pleased with his answer and whispered something to him. Aguni then makes his way out of the scene. You successfully tug your arm out of the militant’s grasp, glaring at him and moving away.

“All executive members are to gather in the meeting room!” Hatter announces to everyone.

The militants rush out of the scene and Hatter watches as they walk away.

“Arisu, you’re coming too.” He orders without looking at him, still eyeing the gunned men who have their backs turned to him. “I heard your potential from Ann. Follow me.”

Arisu looks at Usagi and then at you. You nod at him, assuring silently that the two of you will be okay.

“I’ll be back,” Arisu promises to Usagi who was still sitting down.

Your male friend follows Hatter and Usagi trails behind him in worry but stops after a few steps. You follow her and place a hand on her shoulder, staring at the back of your friend who was to be in a meeting with the executives.

“Usagi. He’ll be fine.” You tell her in comfort, mostly telling it to yourself too.

You turn back at Kuina, about to ask her if she knows where they’re going.

But what you saw froze you in your place, dropping your hand from Usagi’s shoulder.

You felt your heart drop to your stomach. That white jacket. That platinum blonde. Those cat-like eyes. Your eyes must be deceiving you. It can’t be.

“Shuntarou.” You sang as you entered the Doctors’ lounge room.

He was alone and it was so quiet you can hear a pin drop so you don’t miss how he audibly sighs. You giggle, well aware of the fact that you annoy the shit out of him. You sit across from him. He was reading some patient information with three books stacked on the coffee table in front of him.

As usual, he doesn’t even express his negative welcome with words.

“I bought you something,” you wave the paper bag in front of his face in excitement.

It didn’t surprise him. You always do this. Whenever you were out shopping, you had to buy him one thing. It was an unspoken rule you set for yourself. And it could be anything—no price range, no rules. One time, you bought him a plant. It died in three weeks. So, you set another rule for yourself, only inanimate objects as gifts.

You set the paper bag down and take out the box inside it. You know he won’t bother opening it in front of you so you open it yourself.

As you take off the lid, you excitedly say, “Tada!”

His eyes flit to the content of the box for a second and then to you before going back to his patient’s papers. He never says thank you for any of your gifts but you don’t really mind. He didn’t ask for them anyway. But you know when he likes the gifts. It’s how you know more about him. He’ll never tell you what he likes or dislikes so it was up to you to figure it out.

“It’s nice, isn’t it? Can you wear this when we go on our date?” You press him as you take out the white jacket from the box.

It wasn’t a date. But he doesn’t deny it so that was enough for you.

Before he answers (but you doubt he would), the door of the lounge opens and walks in Nakamura Hina. She was your senior in med school and a great doctor. She’s also one of Chishiya’s co-workers.

She’s nice and she never showed you anything bad but you sense that she doesn’t like you. You didn’t mind. There was a pretty long line and you don’t plan on opening the doors to any of them.

“Y/N, you’re here,” she states the obvious and gives you a tight strained smile. Her eyes flit over to Chishiya.

“Chishiya, Mr. Yamamoto wants you in his office to talk about the patient.”

Without saying a word, he was already on his feet, not even sparing you a glance and following Nakamura out the door. You stand up too.

“I’ll head out too! Remember what I said, okay?”

He doesn’t even acknowledge you and kept on walking. Hina was looking at you with pity in her eyes. You’ve grown accustomed to it. That was your reputation anyway–the rich girl always hanging around Chishiya Shuntarou.

When they were out of the door, you slump back down your seat and groan.

Before leaving, you fixed your gift back in the paper bag and set it down next to his things.

You hope he’ll wear it, at least.

It’s Chishiya. Your Chishiya was beside Kuina.

He was staring ahead of you so you purposefully blocked his sight, forcing yourself to be in his sight. It was so you to force your way into his life.

If he looks at you, then it’s real. He’s real.

His gaze drops on your face but as soon as his eyes meet yours, Usagi speaks.

“Y/N? What’s wrong?”

This made you look at her. “It’s—,” you look back at him but find yourself gazing at a crowd with no Chishiya or Kuina in sight.

He’s here in Borderlands.

Scared to be alone in such a dangerous place, Usagi and you slept in her room. You lie on your backs and side by side on her bed. Inches away from each other, you could practically feel Usagi’s anxiety reeking off and unto you.

“Do you think Arisu’s fine right now?” Usagi finally thinks out loud.

You sigh. “He can handle himself.” You pause and think about the man you considered your friend. “He’s smart, isn’t he?”

You feel her genuinely smile beside you. “It’s definitely one of his strengths.”

“So you like smart guys too?” You tease her. “I get it,” you add, thinking about a certain genius doctor you know.

“Too? What does that mean? Your type is smart guys?” She gets excited and faces you on her side, leaning her chin on her palm and putting her upper weight on her elbow.

You purse your lips. “I’m not telling you.”

She shakes you and whines. “Come on. Tell me.”

You grin and lean on your elbow too, now facing each other like two teenage girls in a sleepover. Doing this felt like ages ago. You used to gush over Chishiya to your girlfriends who clearly felt annoyed and tired of it. But right now, Usagi was waiting and is so excited for you to tell her all about the guy you liked. It reminded you of how life used to be so simple. Now, romance was a luxury no one can afford in Borderlands.

“He’s a doctor.” You start. “We’ve known each other since we were kids. Our parents were coworkers and friends.”

“I was in med school too. We were both there together. It’s kind of an unspoken thing that we’re arranged to be married. I hated studying medicine. So I didn’t really pursue it after college.” You pause, thinking about much easier times. “Chishiya, though, he’s good at everything. He’s smart and he’s so cool. He isn’t like anyone I've ever met.”

“So it’s him? The person you’re going back to after Borderlands?” Usagi asks, sweetly and in awe.

You gave her a sad smile. “That was the plan.”

Her brow furrowed and formed into a frown. “What do you mean?”

You lie back down, looking up at the ceiling with tears in your eyes. It’s a good thing the lights were off. “I saw him tonight. He’s here.”

“He’s here?” She doesn’t hide the shock in her tone and you nod. “Why didn’t you go to him?”

“It’s weird.” You admit. “I’m kinda scared.”

It’s true. You were scared. At first, you were shocked but then you were scared. Chishiya were in the same deadly games you’ve been in. Needless to say, they were traumatic and insane. You don’t doubt that he won all those games but still, you were scared. One wrong move is all it takes sometimes. He could die any day here in Borderlands instead of him waiting for you in the real Tokyo. And would he care about you here? Without the threat of your parents knowing their daughter’s every move?

“You’re scared of your boyfriend?” She huffs, trying to lighten the mood.

“That’s the thing. He’s not my boyfriend,” you answer with a sad voice. “I was just this girl who chased him around. I didn’t mean a thing to him. I’m scared that he won’t care about me here.”

Usagi places a hand on top of mine.

“I’m sure he will. You’re hard not to care about, Y/N.”

You slept that night with a heavy heart. You’ve come a long way in the games. You sacrificed, killed, and bled just so you can come back to a life that was not even worth living for a man that was fighting for his life in the games as well.

It scares you a lot because as much as you do not care about what happens to you, you know that you’ll die for him. You realize that your feelings for him run that deep. You love him that much.

That very night, you realize that your goal in Borderland has changed.

It wasn’t to go back to Chishiya. It was to make sure that he gets out of here alive. Even if meant your damnation, you’ll gladly take it.

The next morning, Arisu, Usagi, and you went around the Beach to gather information. There wasn’t much. You learned that there weren't any games beyond Tokyo and it wasn’t accessible at all. Whoever leaves Tokyo or the country, a laser shoots them from the sky.

The three of you assume that the only real way to get out of here was to play the games.

“I’ll go to the annex basement,” Usagi says as the three of you walk outside the building. “I’ll go get some food supplies and any weapons that we can use.”

“I’ll go with you,” you tell her. She nods at me. “I’m going to look for someone I know.”

You spun and nodded at Arisu. “I’ll look for some more information if I can, in case we need it.”

The two of you separated from Arisu and did what you told him you will. You didn’t find Chishiya. You didn’t think it wise to ask the residents of the Beach about his whereabouts because it wouldn’t be wise for them to know about your association with him. None of these people can be trusted.

When the three of you met up once again, Usagi began to tell Arisu that the Beach had gathered quite a large number of firearms and it was guarded.

“As long as they have those firearms, Hatter is dangerous,” Usagi worried.

You nod. “The militants too. They overpower us.”

Arisu stops walking, thinking deeply. Usagi asks him what’s wrong but he walks again and looks out the window.

Out there, the residents of the Beach we’re partying like there’s no tomorrow.

“The Beach,” Arisu starts. “A utopia built upon charisma. However, maybe that’s just our imagination. A utopia doesn’t exist in this world.”

Usagi and you look at each other, confused at your friend’s mumbling.

“Usagi. Y/N. I’d like to talk to you about something.”

He stares at the two of you deeply in the eye, waiting for your answer intently.

You let out a loud huff. “Why? What’s got you serious all of a sudden?”

You were mad. You found Chishiya on the rooftop with Kuina. How dare him tell Arisu to specifically leave you out of his plan?

“Y/N?” The tall woman was the first one to see you approaching with heavy breaths and clenched fists.

“Why would you tell Arisu to leave me out of the plan? What if something happens to the four of you? What am I supposed to do?” You protest in anger.

“Kuina.”

He only says her name but Kuina understands him. She gives him a nod and taps you on your shoulder before heading inside and out of the rooftop.

“I want to help. I want to leave here too,” you plead with him and take his hand. He pulls it away from your grasp and your heart doesn’t miss to ache because of that action.

“What is so valuable about your life outside Borderlands, anyway?”

“What?”

“You spend all day swiping Daddy’s credit card and drinking with your fake plastic friends. And when you’re bored of them, you come to the hospital to annoy me.”

“Why are you saying this?” Tears well up in your eyes. It’s not that he was lying. All he said was true. You know that you do, in fact, annoy him. You don’t forget the evident irritation on his face whenever he sees you approaching before Borderlands.

You couldn’t help it. Even if the life you had before was dull, there was something about him that pulled you in. You know that he never liked you despite the association of your parents to his. But to hear it tonight, right when you’ve only asked him if you could be a part of his plans—that you want to help him leave The Beach and out of Borderlands.

“Just go back to your room, Y/L/N.”

Stupid. Worthless. Annoying. That’s what he thinks you are. You’re too stupid to be in his oh-so-great plans to leave The Beach. You’re worthless in his and your own life. Most of it all, you were nothing but a nuisance to him. He doesn’t even think of you as a friend. He just thinks of you as someone whom his parents thrusted to.

You agree it’d be better if you weren’t sent to this world with him. But you were.

“I’m serious. You’ll mess up my plan,’ he even adds.

“Why would I do that? What about the games I played? Do you not think I’ve won them with my hard work?”

He makes a tsk sound, staring ahead. It was chillier on the rooftop than expected and your long-sleeved shirt wasn’t enough to shield you from the cold. But you endure it for him and for this argument.

“No. You’ve won games on your own.”

“Then why?” You plead. “Why do you think I’m incapable?”

“I don’t think you’re incapable.”

“Probably not. But you think I’m nothing but a burden to you.”

“You are.” Typical. Unfiltered and cruel truth comes out of his mouth.

“Then you should just let me die in the games I will be in. That way, you’re free of me forever. You’d be able to come back to our life, Chishiya. I know it. I just want to help you. Because I—, even if I’m not your friend, you are mine.” You rarely call him by his last name. The only other times were when it was necessary so you don’t doubt that he felt the coldness in your voice when you uttered his name.

‘Because I love you’, you almost let out.

You don’t wait for his answer and turn around, leaving him alone on the rooftop with his uncaring face and his hand inside the pocket of his white jacket.

While his other hand, the one you held in yours, twitches against the cold breeze of the night.

As Shuntaro’s childhood friend, his unfiltered words were nothing but old news to you. Every time he’d push you away and tell you mean things in disguise of cold harsh truth, you won’t deny that you feel a pang of pain in your heart for a millisecond. But, as aforementioned, with the years you’ve known the nonchalant cat-man, you’ve learned to tug that feeling away as soon as possible.

Right now though, you find yourself exhausted dealing with him.

Now, your feet have carried you to Arisu’s doorstep instead of yours. Despite knowing Chishiya before Borderlands, you weren’t brought here with him. You had your first games alone. That’s when you found Usagi and then eventually, a distraught and defeated Arisu lying on the street.

You spent most of your time in Borderlands with him and Asugi. The three of you joined The Beach together. Who would’ve thought you’d find your long-time crush and friend here as one of the executives?

But before knowing he was here, all your thoughts consisted of the guilt of survival. After all the games you were in, why have you survived? You didn’t deserve it. You don’t consider yourself a good person. You were high on privilege and you basked in it. Your life was pointless with no real hardship.

You’ve confided in Arisu when these thoughts occur. It wasn’t because he was good at comforting you. It was because he understood. He told you he lived a similar life before Borderlands. You picked each other up when he lost Karube and Chotta.

You knocked on his door while hugging yourself in one arm. Your head was all scrambled and there was an aching pain in your heart because of Chishiya.

“Y/N?”

Arisu opens the door to you with tears streaming down your face. His hair was shaggier than usual and he could barely open his eyes. You felt a bit guilty for waking him up so late at night.

“What happened?”

And then you spilled everything to him—the talk with Chishiya and the way you felt about the blonde. You told him how you felt cast aside on the plan to steal the cards.

In the dark of Arisu’s room and on his bed, you tore open your heart in front of him. Your friend sat quietly on the side, listening while rubbing your back in comfort.

It’s ironic how Arisu felt more like a friend than someone you knew for more than a decade. To Chishiya, you were nothing but a burden. Just someone who his parents wanted him to be associated with. His father is a great doctor and a good friend of your father, the owner of multiple hospitals all over Japan.

And you, you were studying medicine as well but you never particularly felt attached to it. It felt like something you had to do. You were supposed to inherit all of it anyway.

You don’t consider yourself intelligent but you had good grades up to high school. It was during college that you started to drift away.

Little do you know, your parents didn’t think you were capable of handling all your businesses from the start. That’s why they chose Chishiya. He was put in the same classes as you from high school up to med school. It was never spoken of but both of you know—Chishiya was being put beside you to marry you and have him take over the company. Chishiya Shuntaro, the genius child.

It was what your parents wanted. It was what his parents wanted. It was what you learned to want. It was what he never wanted.

No, he did want your father’s position. He was always drawn to power and control. And he will get it. But you were the weight that had to come with it. It hurts but it’s the truth.

You clung to him for a long while. But a person can only take so much. Maybe he finally had enough. Without your parents in Borderland, he was free of your childish antics. If you die out here, you know that your parents will still take him in. In fact, maybe they’d be glad that they’ve gotten rid of you. It was nothing but a formality after all—just to say that the next owner is still of your father’s blood.

Despite all that, you love him. You love all of him. You love him even if he looks bored to death when he’s with you. You love him even if he straight up refuses to teach you the lessons you have a hard time on, only to give you his notes right after and even quiz you on them. You love him so much that you accepted being treated like you were worthless and nothing but a pretty display of a daughter by your father so you can have him. If Chishiya wanted to be selfish, then so can you. If he has your position as chairman, then you’ll have him. It’s only fair. He can be happy with his power and miserable with you and you can be happy with him and miserable with your life.

Chishiya is a complicated person. You know that deep inside, he has learned to care for you. Even for a little bit. Well, that’s what you try to believe.

“I’m sorry for waking you up.” You say to Arisu when you are done venting.

Arisu smiles and sighs.

“Our plan, Y/N. It’s dangerous and I understand him.”

You sniffed and paused. “You think I’m incapable too?”

His eyes widened and he shook his head violently. “No. No. That’s not what I meant.” You chuckled at his troubled facial expressions.

“I meant that if I cared about someone, I wouldn’t want them in danger.” He explains himself.

You went quiet after those words. Was it possible? Was it possible that Chishiya was ignoring and pushing you away in Borderlands because he… cared?

You don’t want to hope… but god do you want to.

“He hasn’t seen you in those games. You are more than capable, Y/N. I know it. But I know that if I had the option, I won’t risk putting my friend in danger.”

You nod, taking in his words with understanding. You want to believe that Arisu was right. You want to trust Chishiya. But could you? Do you really know the man behind the rose-colored glasses you wear when you see him?

“Okay,” you sigh.

That night, you stayed with Arisu in his room after arguing with Arisu to let you sleep on the couch instead of his bed. You only didn’t want to risk seeing Chishiya if you went back to yours, especially when his room was a couple of doors down from yours. And you were too tired that you just wanted to crash.

As you stare at the ceiling of the room and feel the digging of your shoulder blades and hips on the couch, you think about the person you and Chishiya were before Borderlands. It hasn’t been long but you’ve already found yourself comfortable with sleeping anywhere, not bathing for days, and hardly eating anything at all. You hadn’t faced any of these hardships.

Arisu was already awake when knocking on his door woke you up from your slumber on his couch. You stirred yourself awake and stood up from the couch.

“Kuina,” you hear him say as he opens the door.

You rise to your feet and head to the door. Kuina’s stare lingers at your recently woken-up form but waves at you and greets you anyway. You wave back.

Kuina whispers something to Arisu and he nods then looks back at you. “Y/N. You can follow Kuina after you’ve fixed yourself, okay?”

You hate this. You felt like a child being taken care of.

Kuina guides you outside the building after being holed up inside your room for the day. It seemed like the plan was a success and you were just waiting for the others.

You tap your foot repeatedly to aid your nerves. Kuina stood beside you quietly, chewing on her stick.

“It’s really hard not to have a smoke right now,” she sighs and talks to no one in particular.

“What’s taking them so long?” you couldn’t help but ask.

As if on cue, Chishiya walks out of the building with his hands in his pockets. You frown when there was no one who followed him next, no sign of the shaggy-haired boy and the athletic girl you’ve grown to love.

“I guess it’s time to say goodbye to this too.” Chishiya removes the band from his wrist indicating his ranking among the executives.

You follow him with your gaze but look behind him from time to time.

“Where’s Arisu? Usagi?” You ask him, worry evident in your tone.

Chishiya stares at you, looking at you with those unfeeling and unemotional eyes. You stare back at them, trying to decipher what he means. And then it hits you.

“No,” you breathe out.

You look at the girl beside you who hung her head low, not being able to look at you.

“Kuina?” Your voice weakened.

Your heart sunk to your stomach. Anger filled your senses and for the very first time ever, you felt hatred for the man in front of you.

“You sacrificed them?!”

He looks away. “It was the only way.”

“They’re my friends,” you complain with a heavy heart. “Arisu is my friend.”

“I feel really bad for them, Chishiya,” Kuina adds.

His gaze flits back to you. “Oh, is that why you ran to your friend’s room for the night after our argument?”

How did he know that? But why does he care?

“Yes. Because unlike you, he gives a shit about me.” You answer with spite. “How could you do this to him? To me? Is this why you didn’t include me in the plans? Because you know I’ll stop you?”

Chishiya doesn’t answer for a while. Silence fills the void between the two of you. Kuina stays silent by your side, watching the scene unfold with her eyes.

“Then go.”

His words held no emotion as he stared at you deadly.

“I betrayed them so we can go out. The three of us. But if you want to go, then go. Help them. I don’t care.”

You look at him and then back to the building. Arisu and Usagi were probably being held by the militants right now. You’ll be outnumbered and caught. But what were you going to do? Go with Chishiya and leave them to die? You thought about the awful things they would’ve done to the three of you if it wasn’t for Hatter stopping them and you felt sick to your stomach. This was not the game. You aren’t supposed to kill and betray unless you were forced to in a game.

Arisu and Usagi are your friends. Chishiya is your friend. You’ve never had real friends before, at least no one really felt like they were. Arisu and Usagi were the first people who made you feel like they were happy to be your friend.

You can’t leave your friends.

“You have the cards, right?” You ask him.

He smirks. “Of course, I do.”

He says it with confidence like he has the ticket to the way out of Borderlands. With this, he was so sure that you’d have to come out with him. So you can go out. That was what he believed you wanted—that you wanted to go back to your life before.

But he was wrong.

“Then you’ll be fine.”

His eyes widened for a second before they turned to something different. They weren’t as dark or lifeless as they usually are. Instead, you could almost see a hint of surprise and maybe even hurt spread across his eyes.

You jump to him and wrap your arms around the man. How many times have you hugged him? You could probably count it with your hands. So you take it in, close your eyes, and try to engrave the feeling in your brain.

“Take care of my parents and the hospitals, yeah?” You whisper in his ear and hold on for five more seconds before completely letting him go.

“Kuina, look out for him, please?” You ask the tall girl but don’t wait for her answer.

Chishiya still stares at you, unspeaking. You look at him one more time and give him a sad smile with tears in your eyes before turning around. You’re afraid that if you look back again, you’ll run to his arms once more and cry about how much you love him.

He doesn’t care if you do. It’s better for you to leave him.

He has the cards now which means he’ll be fine. He can get out of here. If there was someone who can, it was him.

He has no purpose for you anymore and you’ll only be a burden.

With that, you run back inside the building.

#chishiya x reader #chishiya alice in borderland #chishiya shuntaro #chishiya imagine #chishiya x you #chishiya angst

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missycolorful · 6 months

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The scene with q!Forever and q!Philza at Global spawn in Pugatory is something that will always kinda sit in the back of my head. Because it truly, truly solidifies the strength in their dynamic, and neither of them will probably realize it lol. Hello, I'm here to be insane about q!philever, so buckle up

Like everyone else, q!Phil was dealing with a lot in Purgatory. He began to lose trust in close friends. He wasn't sure he'd even be able to save his children. While trying to uphold his morality and not kill except in self-defense, he was very much walking a fine, jittery line. All while trying to keep his team organized and motivated. Aside from kind of losing his mind like the others, there was no clear indication that Phil's composure was dangling by a loose thread.

But then he's allowed a moment of peace to exchange information with another team. It's just him and Forever. No kills planned, nothing. Just two people allowed to talk about the absurd situation they've been thrown into. A moment to really take everything in.

During the conversation, Forever doesn't hold judgement toward Phil or anyone else due to the event, even when he comments on Philza's kill on Rivers. Even when Phil tries to justify his actions, Forever doesn't hold it against him. It's hard to say exactly how important this is to what happens next, but I feel like it means something here.

It's when q!Forever says that once they leave Global Spawn, that they become "enemies" again, this is when q!Philza breaks. And I think this moment has been glossed over by many (I want more fan art, dammit >:T) cause it doesn't feel big on the surface. It's not like cc!Philza genuinely sounds heartbroken, his cries sound... a little exaggerated/dramatic, you know? What he cries about isn't anything groundbreaking, it's what many of them feel ("I don't want to be here." "I don't want to kill my friends."), even though Phil fans can sense a deeper meaning here. And after Forever briefly consoles Philza ("Everything is going to be good. This is what we need to go through."), Phil, like a flick of a switch, is right back to his composed, level-headed self. It was like that moment never even happened.

But it did, and it drives me crazy that he did it in front of Forever. cc!Phil made that conscious choice to have his character lose composure, his character that he and his fans knows is an emotionally constipated motherfucker. And the reason it drives me nuts is because how the fuck did we get here?

I can imagine this scenario with lots of characters, and it never plays out like this (i.e. with Tubbo, he'd likely just keep it all in. Et cetra.). I don't see him letting himself be this vulnerable around most others. Hell, before this, I never would've imagined he'd do this in front of Forever, either.

But the more I think about it, it kinda makes sense.

Phil and Forever's relationship is a funny one. Early on, Phil wouldn't trust Forever with a toothpick. He'd never be emotionally open with him. Forever even held a bit of animosity toward Philza after Phil'a final rejection. But that rocky start is honestly a huge part of why it is as strong as it is now. Cause, well, the strength of any relationship comes from accepting all parts of a person. Flaws and all.

Some characters hold Philza up on a pedestal (i.e. q!Missa). They don't really see his flaws. They don't think about his ugly sides. They just see a pillar of a man who is always willing to help, who can do anything and everything, who keeps composed and lighthearted and level-headed in any scenario. q!Forever was kinda like this, at one point.

But Forever realizes that isn't the case eventually. Because Phil's not great at dealing with emotional situations, and Forever learns that the hard way. Phil's not good at talking about feelings, he can be blunt and a bit harsh, because he's a pragmatic sort of guy. But it takes a softer, gentle approach to reject someone, and Phil wasn't ready for that. So, in retaliation to the hurt Phil caused him, Forever had a conflicted relationship with him. It didn't last long, but I digress. This brief shift in their relationship was for the better. By not placing him on this pedestal anymore, Forever began to see Philza in a different light. One that didn't cast Brunim in its shadow.

With Philza, Phil saw Forever at, arguably, his worst in the beginning. Obsessive, threatening, clutching onto a pipe dream with no regard for Phil's feelings. But over time, Phil got to see the much more real sides of Forever. When Tallulah lost her first life, when Forever made NINHO. He saw a passionate and intelligent side to this guy who was obsessed with him, and he respected that person. And with this recognition, he offered his trust to Forever, such as giving one of his presidential votes to Forever.

Both of their perspectives for the other changed throughout the first few months, and I believe they gained some level of appreciation between them because of that. They share this newfound respect and trust. And that is the core to their new relationship. Consistently, Forever and Phil have given each other open and mutual respect and trust. Never is either of these things taken for granted, abused, or manipulated in any way.

When Forever is hooked on the happy pills, he subconsciously seeks out Philza's help, which Phil offers with ease. Before Forever goes to the Nether, Phil expresses his worry and wants to help. But he doesn't push, because he respects Forever's agency, and trusts that Forever is doing what he thinks is best. (also during this scene, when Forever gave him access to the warpstone in that secret part of his base, only Forever and Richas had access to it beforehand, which feels like a big moment according to his fans, so! :D). So when Forever returns to the Nether, while he doesn't believe Fit and Pierre when they say they tried to save him, he absolutely, 100% believes in Philza.

Because he knows Philza by now, and Philza knows Forever. Maybe not on equal levels, but still. After merely a few months, they've slowly begun to understand each other a bit more. So I guess it's only natural that they'd be more open around each other.

I'd even argue that this isn't the first time Philza lets down his walls around Forever. It just didn't happen when Forever was awake.

I wouldn't say that Phil talking to Forever while he was in a coma is the same level of vulnerability as the scene in Purgatory. Because Phil wasn't totally direct with his feelings, he sort of deflected (the story, banging the pots and pans, calling him an idiot, etc). Hell, even when he is expresses how he feels, he's not entirely direct: "We just really care about you. We wanna see you come back. You're making us worry." Like, of course everyone cares, but to say this as we when it's just the two of you obviously feels like a moment of vulnerability but not wanting to admit to it. Cause, hey, under different circumstances, he absolutely would've committed to visiting Forever in the hospital every day. Still, his very open worry did give off a sense that his walls were crumbling.

So with all of this, if Philza can meet with someone alone in practical hell, and that someone, a person he openly trusts and cares about, can look him in the eye and say "I don't judge you" on the things he's has done, maybe that allowed the floodgates to open for a bit. Maybe once Forever said they'd be enemies outside those doors, the situation hit Phil like a truck, and he just couldn't keep it in anymore. And maybe knowing it was just the two of them, Phil knew he could be a person around Forever, not a leader or a mentor or a force to be reckoned with. And Phil really needs someone on equal footing with him like this. He needs someone he can feel safe around. So for him to find this in Forever, of all people, even if it's just for this moment, is extremely important to me.

The way their relationship has progressed, perhaps it would've been simply a matter of time for Philza to be open with Forever. I dunno when Phil will be quite so open around Forever again, but I do say when with a fair enough of certainty (or I could be wrong and I'm simply talking straight outta my ass but who knows). Because to have this moment with Forever was intentional, even if it feels like a blink and you miss moment. It may have been under a minute, it may not feel important to other viewers. BUT to me, it genuinely says so much about their relationship, how far they have come, and where they are now.

#qsmp #qsmp meta #sugarduo #philever #philza #forever #missy rambles #or none of it means anything and this never gets brought up or anything like that again and phil is mocking us for our dramatics🤷#either way idc let me have fun i love these two so muchhhhhhhhh <3 #long post

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nobodyfamousposts · 1 year

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Another Miraculous Crossover Nobody Wanted (DCxML)

In the midst of so many Batfamily/Miraculous crossovers, the thing I feel so many people forget is that the Waynes are...well...themselves.

Sure, they're awesome vigilantes. Trained in martial arts and with great mental fortitude to help them against the likes of Scarecrow's fear gas, Joker's venom, and Mad Hatter's manipulations.

...the problem is that Hawk Moth is a whole different ballgame.

He doesn't target their fears or dreams. He targets ANYTHING. Like petty annoyances. Frustrations. Sleep deprivation. Obsessions. Things the Batfamily generally try to ignore on a regular basis.

If he can akumatize and reakumatize the same man over his love of pigeons and people who feel they've been wronged over silly reasons, there's SO MUCH that could come from the complete dysfunction/emotional constipation that is the Wayne family. Remember, ANY frustration or annoyance or upset counts.

Meaning Ladybug and Chat will be having their hands full with the Waynes until they leave.

And given that Hawk Moth comes up with the silliest costumes and powers...

...the others would never let them live it down.

...

It was a beautiful day in Paris. And an absolutely wonderful vacation to the City of Love, where everything was peaceful and nothing was wrong.

Dick stood at the window looking out over the city.

Tim was on his computer doing some reports. Possibly Wayne Enterprises work, but more likely mission work.

Damien had apparently gotten tired of grumbling and was focused on sharpening his sword—which Bruce really shouldn’t have let him bring. But given the situation, he couldn’t argue against letting Damien have something that would help him stay calm.

Cass had found a magazine to occupy her time, though she seemed somewhat confused as to the male teen model that kept appearing in nearly every line.

And Jason…

…he was grinning. And watching Bruce with such anticipation, looking downright hopeful as he waited. Not helping was that he was holding what appeared to be a brand new camera, fully prepared to start recording.

Bruce knew why.

But he would not give him the satisfaction.

Because nothing was going to happen.

Absolutely nothing.

Bruce twitched.

SNAP!

And his pen cracked from the sheer amount of pressure he was putting on it. Which was admittedly an annoyance, but wasn’t that big of a deal…

…if it wasn’t the 15th pen he’d broken in the past three hours.

It was fine though.

Nothing was wrong.

He was calm.

Calm.

A muffled voice could be heard from outside despite the room being on the seventh floor of a building. Which of course was a coincidence and not because someone was actually right outside the room….and the building.

And perhaps if Bruce tried really hard, he could convince himself was just someone singing a line out of “American Pie” and not someone talking about butterflies.

No.

Because there were no butterflies outside. Because he was fine!

Not the slightest bit upset!

At. All.

“That’s thirty-three…” Dick counted.

…

…Dammit.

Bruce sighed.

“Did she come back to the roof?”

“Actually, she never left.” Tim confirmed, not even looking up from his computer. “She stopped leaving after the last incident and has just been standing there for the past couple hours now, catching them as they come.”

A long pause.

“How…?”

“Her partner has been bringing her water and snacks. And keeping watch whenever she has to leave to hibernate or use the little bug’s room.”

Bruce groaned.

Why couldn’t it be a villain? Or a fan or stalker? He could deal with those. He dealt with them all the time.

It was the well intentioned young superheroes that he had a harder time dealing with. The ones that wanted to help but were misguided in not understanding that their help wasn’t necessary.

“Gotcha!”

“Thirty-four.” Dick droned.

…no matter how many magical butterflies implied otherwise.

“Maybe we should do what the nice Ladybug hero asked and finish up our business in Paris?” Tim suggested.

“I refuse!” Damien shouted, jumping to his feet. “This villain has made a mockery of us and it must not be allowed to stand! I will not leave until he has been caught and my sword has tasted his blood!”

“Damien, we don’t kill, remember?”

“I wouldn’t kill him.” Damien said, looking away with a pout. “Just…dismember him a bit.” He frowned, consideringly. “Maybe cut off his arms. He can’t continue villainy then, right?”

Tim sighed.

“So that’s a no on going home early then.”

They heard a noise from the roof.

“Is she leaving?” Bruce asked, trying to hide how hopeful he was.

“Nope. It’s her catboyfriend back again.” Dick replied, blithely.

Bruce sighed.

“Do you think they’re dating?”

“Dick.” Bruce warned.

“Because the city seems to be really hamming up the romantic angle between the two and it’s kinda hard to not see.” Dick continued.

“Dick.”

“Even if it is kinda weird that they’re essentially shipping teenagers.”

“Speaking from experience there, Dickie Boy?” Jason cut in, cheekily.

“Stop it. Both of you.” Bruce ordered. “The goal of coming to Paris was supposed to be to deal with the emotional terrorism from Hawk Moth.”

“A little hard with all your emotional constipation there, B.”

Jason smirked.

“Or should I say ‘Justice Man’?”

Bruce twitched.

#ml fic #ml crossover #dc crossover #bruce wayne #batfamily #dick grayson #jason todd #damien wayne #tim drake #ml crack #ml humor #miraculous ladybug #bruce wayne is bad at feelings #jason is having too much fun #yes I'm making fun of them #I do it out of love

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joelalorian · 3 months

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Tides of Desire - Chapter Twelve: Turn the Corner

*mood board by the lovely @janaispunk. divider by the equally lovely @saradika-graphics

Pairing: Yacht Captain!Joel Miller x f!reader

Series Summary: TLOU no outbreak AU. Joel Miller is a luxury yacht captain running charters in the Caribbean. You join the crew as a deckhand and unexpectedly complicate Joel's peaceful existence. Basically the TLOU bunch on a Below Deck yacht.

Chapter warnings: 18+ MDNI. Angst, cursing, some deep conversations, forgiveness, fluff, and a lil bit of smut. Smallish age gap (reader is 32 or so, Joel is 40). No use of y/n, though reader is of British descent and has the nickname Brit (occasionally used). Chapter names are nautical phrases.

a/n: So, I thought there'd be a couple more chapters, but Joel said no. He wanted the tale to end here, so it does. What can I say, that man gets what he wants. There will be an epilogue, though. He's not the total boss of me. Hope you enjoy!

Series masterlist

Days after the fall, you felt a lot better. Physically, at least.

Emotionally? That was an entirely different story. You didn’t know how you felt, torn between two dueling desires – one for self-respect along with the respect you are due from Joel and the other a life with Joel. Was it too much to hope for both at the same time?

You and Joel still hadn’t talked about that morning, each of you dancing in circles around the topic but never coming right out to discuss it. There was no getting around it, you knew that, but still you hesitated. Why was it so hard?

Joel, being a man of action, showed you he was trying every minute after you were hurt. He took exceptional care of you, making sure you wanted for nothing as you recovered. His efforts bordered on too much after a few days, leaving you wanting a bit of space to think. Despite the care he took of you, you couldn’t get past the hurt in your heart once the pain in your head eased.

The anguish in his big, brown eyes when you told him you needed space haunted you, but you stood strong in your convictions. The return to your cabin was surreal after the luxury of Joel’s quarters and spacious bed, but it was necessary to decompress and sort through all the jumbled thoughts bouncing around in your muddled mind.

“Ah, the prodigal bunk mate returns!” Tess teased as you sauntered into the cabin the morning before the next charter started. “Finally gracing us mere peasants with your presence, are you?”

“Oh, shove off, ya muppet,” you snarked, plopping down on your bunk. Holy hell, Joel’s bed was a lot more comfortable that this lumpy pile of cotton and springs, you thought.

“How are you feeling?” Tess jumped down from her bed to perch herself at the end of yours.

You shrugged. “Physically, I’m fine.”

A single eyebrow arced upwards, reading between the lines as always. “And emotionally?”

Again, you shrugged, tears tickling the back of your eyes at the soft, sympathetic look on Tess’s face. The pair of you leant back against opposite bulkheads of your bunk and Tess stretched her legs, softly bumping her knee against yours.

“Let it off your chest, Brit,” Tess encouraged. “Better out than in, as they say.”

A snort escaped before you could stop it. “I think ‘they’ were referring to vomit, Tess.”

“Whatever, the sentiment is still the same. You need to vent and I’m here for it.” Tess smiled, a little mischief glinting in her eyes. “Plus, I’ve known Joel a long time. I’m well aware of what an emotionally constipated fuckwit he can be sometimes.”

That drew a laugh from you, which you realized was her goal. “He really can be, yeah?”

“You have no idea,” Tess agreed with a chuckle. “He’s gotten a lot better with age, but he’s still a man, so of course he’s as dumb as a box of rocks when it comes to emotional intelligence and expressing himself properly.”

The two of you spent the morning chatting as you recounted your view of things between you and Joel and Tess shared some insights into Joel’s mindset and how he’s tripping all over himself to make things right again. It was an enjoyable morning, especially once the conversation moved away from Joel and more onto Tess’s life and what she like to do during off season.

As you chatted, you briefly thought back to the initial days on the yacht, how you thought she and Joel were an item, and how much that bummed you out. Knowing the both of them as you now did, the idea of them as a couple was laughable. Tess would run circles around him until inevitably driving him crazy.

Around mid-day, Sarah joined you both, bearing leftover sandwiches that Tess made yesterday. She squeezed in between the two of you, her back against the bulkhead wall. It was a tight fit with three grown women and the low ceiling of the top bunk looming overhead, but you all made it work.

The addition of Sarah raised your spirits further. She was such a spitfire, caring and witty, and always ready and willing to throw her father under the bus for one thing or another.

“My dad’s an idiot,” she blurted around a mouthful of food as you lamented once again on not knowing how to proceed. “But he’s an idiot in love, anyone can see that.”

That stopped you in your tracks.

Eyes wide and unbelieving, you stared at Sarah. “You think he’s in love with me?”

Meeting your gaze head on, Sarah nodded, dark brown eyes speaking volumes. “Oh, I know he’s in love with you. He told me yesterday. It’s why he’s so distraught over everything and why he wouldn’t let you out of his sight until now.”

“Geez, kid, you don’t think he’d want to be the one to tell her something like that?” Tess chimed in with a chuckle, shaking her head at the younger woman.

Still stunned, you just sat there staring between the two of them. Joel was in love with you. He was in love with you.

“I’m in love with him, too.” You didn’t even realize you spoke the words aloud until you noticed Sarah and Tess staring at you with bright, knowing smiles on their faces.

“Duh,” Sarah teased, patting your leg. “We already knew that.”

Nodding, Tess added, “Maybe it’s time for the two of you to sit down and have a very serious conversation. Get it out of the way before this next charter starts.”

An hour and a shower later, you found yourself making your way to the bridge in search of Joel. The girls were right, this would all weigh on your mind until Joel and you sat down and had a serious chat. But what would you say? How do you even start a conversation like the one you needed to have?

You practiced some openers on your way up the decks, mumbling them to yourself with each step. Joel, you great knob head… No, no, that wouldn’t work. Joel, you bloody prat… Why was everything your brain came up with some variation of a British insult? You did not want to sling insults at the man, just let him know how very hurt you were.

Before you knew it – and well before you thought of the right words to say – you found yourself at the door to the bridge. It was now or never. You opened the door with a shaky hand, stepping through only to find Frank manning the helm. Your face dropped before you could stop it, but your lips quickly tilted upwards into a smile, oddly relieved.

“Hey doll, what are you up to?” Frank’s warm smile immediately calmed your frayed nerves. “Looking for Joel?”

You nodded. “Yeah, I thought it due time to talk.”

Frank smiled encouragingly. “Yeah, it’s definitely that. You two have a lot to figure out. He’s in his quarters.” Gesturing around the corner with a supportive nod, he added, “Good luck, not that you need it. Joel might, though.”

Flashing Frank a grateful half smile, you edged towards Joel’s room, knuckles rapping on the door twice after a deep breath. Maybe you should have asked Frank for pointers on how to start the conversation. Too late now. You’d just have to go with whatever came out of your mouth and hope for the best.

The door opened to reveal Joel, dark curls awry and thick glasses framing his red-rimmed eyes. In a word, he was a mess. You wondered if he even left his quarters since you returned to yours. Glancing around, it didn’t look like it. That made you feel better. He was as wrecked about things as you.

“Hey,” he greeted, eyes apprehensive and distressed. “Everythin’ alright? Is your headache back?”

Even a mess, his broad frame taking up the entire doorway was a sight to behold. God, he was too handsome for words. And his obvious worry over you only made him more so. Clearing your throat, you reminded yourself why you were standing in his doorway mere hours after insisting you needed space.

“Can we talk?”

His brows darted up in surprise. “Uh, sure, yeah, of course.” Joel eyed you for a few moments, clearly uncertain about what to do or say, before adding, “Do you, uh, want to talk here or go somewhere less…”

Your lips tilted up as he trailed off, knowing his brain was working a mile a minute to find his words. “Here’s fine. It will give us privacy.” Your response visibly stunned him. He obviously wasn’t expecting that response from you.

Stepping back after another long moment, Joel ushered you into his private space. The bed still unmade from when you left first thing that morning, you opted to sit in the chair at the desk along the bulkhead, leaving Joel to take a seat on a corner of the bed. You stared at each other for a while, neither knowing how to start, until you couldn’t take the silence anymore.

After a few false starts, you were finally able to find your words.

“Joel, I’m in love with you, but you hurt me. Like really hurt me. And I don’t know how to come back from that.” You watched the expression on his face vacillate from awed and hopeful to wounded and regretful.

“Sweetheart –” he started, his dark eyes round and wet and not quite meeting yours, but you cut him off.

“I know that morning was hard for you, that you were hesitant to start anything with me during season to begin with, but you made the conscious choice to take things further. You did that and still you made it out to be my fault the moment something didn’t go right. You made me the fall guy. That… that really hurt. And it wasn’t fair.”

You paused, already feeling a heavy weight lifted from your chest at having spoken your peace, giving Joel the opportunity to respond. His beautiful brown eyes were large and glassy, lips in a pout as he searched for words to justify his actions, but there were none, you both knew. He was silent so long, dejectedly staring at you that you opened your mouth to say more when he finally found his words.

“I’m an utter asshole, sweetheart. I told you the other day, I won’t do you the disrespect of giving you poor excuses. I was completely in the wrong. I know it, you know it, everyone on this damn boat knows it – believe me, I’ve heard it from nearly every one of them. And I’m glad they feel comfortable enough in this environment and with me to defend you and put me in my place.”

Your lips quirked at that, causing his own to tilt upwards slightly. “We have great people on this crew,” you admitted fondly. Joel’s smile widened ever so slightly.

“I never meant to hurt you – never intended to treat you like I did. I’m ashamed, plain and simple.” Joel cleared his throat, hands running up and down his thighs in a nervous tick. “I can only promise to do better because I love you, sweetheart, and I never want to be the cause of your pain.”

Your eyes leaked fat droplets of saltwater down your cheeks. “You love me?” Even though Sarah basically told you already, it was completely different hearing those words directly from Joel’s lips, the rough timber in his voice matching the sincerity in his gaze.

He nodded, flashing you a watery smile. “I love you like I’ve never loved anyone before. I don’t even know how it happened so quickly, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. Even if you don’t forgive me, I’ll never regret falling in love with you.”

“Joel…” you drew out his name in a long sigh. “I love you, too, but you can’t ever treat me like that again. It’s perfectly fine to be nervous or scared, but we need to communicate rather than snap and push each other away. Okay?”

Joel stood, nodding solemnly as he moved to kneel before you. “I understand. I promise to never treat you like that again. I promise to work on my communication skills. I promise to spend every day proving that I’m worthy of your love.”

His hands clutched your waist by the time he finished speaking. You ran your fingers through his thick curls, mussing them further as you pulled him in for a kiss. The press of his lips against yours soft and sweet, it almost felt like the first time again.

Your heart still hurt, but the pain ebbed away with every soft touch and loving word from Joel. Everything in you told you to forgive him but not let your guard down fully, still wary of getting hurt further. As if he could sense your hesitation, Joel held you close, asking you to stay the night in his quarters. You couldn’t deny him, wanting to connect physically to ease the residual emotional ache.

Joel spread you out on his bed, his mouth tasting every inch of your dewy skin with reverence, as if he needed to sear the taste and feel of you into his memory. He worshiped your body from head to toe, no spot left unexplored. You longed to return each kiss, each tender touch, but Joel insisted this evening was all about you. There would be plenty of time to explore him later.

“I adore you,” he whispered into the soft skin behind your knee.

“I ache for you,” he murmured against your belly.

“I. Love. You,” he said with finality before his lips connected once more with yours.

Shooting stars flashed across your closed eyelids when Joel slipped his cock inside you. Rocking with the gentle flex of his hips, he moved inside you, cock caressing that spongey spot that set you ablaze with each thrust. His mouth alternated between fervent kisses to nibbling on your earlobes and whispering lovely, naughty things in your ears.

It was so different from the other times you had sex together. It was softer, sweeter, and somehow more intimate and meaningful than the other times combined. This… this was making love, you thought. Something you’d never experienced before, and you wondered how you ever lived without it.

You came hard at the realization, giving into every feeling Joel drew from you with his movements and words, the fluttering of your walls around him nearly choking his cock. He came shortly after, stilling as he spilled inside you with a drawn-out cry of your name.

You stayed just as you were, your body beneath Joel’s, his cock still sheathed inside you, staring into each other’s eyes and seeing right into the very essence of each other. This was love. The caring, the forgiving, the open vulnerability… the cracking wide open of your souls to admit that you were hurt or scared and finding the strength to admit flaws and love in spite of them, or because of them.

Life and love were imperfect, and there was beauty in those imperfections.

“I love you, Joel Miller,” you whispered into the night, falling asleep with your head tucked into the curve of his neck, his warm skin blanketing you better than the warmest down comforter ever could.

The echo of your name sounded far away as Joel whispered the words back to you.

This. This was love.

The final weeks of the charter season passed in a blur with long days of work and longer nights of pleasure. The two of you could not get enough of each other, not caring about the exhaustion from limited sleep. You never returned to your cabin for sleeping after that night full of confessions and new beginnings with Joel. It was no surprise to any of the crew, really. There were no secrets on the yacht, nor any talk of impropriety or special treatment. Every person on that boat could see the love practically floating in the air between the two of you as if it was a tangible thing you could hold in your hands.

To demonstrate their approval of the two of you together, the crew placed bets on how soon you’d move to Austin, how soon you’d get engaged, how soon you’d get married. Those little buggers bet on everything when it came to you and Joel. They didn’t bother to hide it either, flaunting the board in your faces with Tommy proudly taking the lead as bookmaker. You couldn’t even be mad about it. They were all just so damn happy for you both, it was infectious.

Once the final round of charter guests departed, Joel took the yacht back out to sea for one last day and the crew celebrated with a party on the sundeck. Tommy and Jake emptied the lazarette of all the water toys for the crew to enjoy. Tess cooked up some delicious tapas on the barbecue. Sammy played DJ with the massive collection of songs on his phone And Sarah, sweet Sarah, made sure the sundeck bar was fully stocked with everyone’s favorite alcohol.

After racing around on a jet ski with Joel, the pair of you settled into the hot tub, sharing a bottle of wine as you watched Tommy, Ellie, Tess, and the interior crew dance around the deck in cheap, fake grass skirts they dug up from who knows where. Frank and Bill sat on the loungers sharing their own bottle of wine, Bill scowling away at the raucous behavior of the others. You would miss every single one of these people who became friends who were more like family to you in a few short months.

You marveled at that. Everything moved faster on the yacht, but what was time, really, when you forged such connections that would last a lifetime?

#joel miller #joel x reader #joel x female reader #yacht captain!joel miller #tlou #the last of us #pedro pascal #fanfic #fanfiction #joel miller x female reader #joel miller smut #joel miller series #joel miller story #pedrostories #joel x f!reader

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bonny-kookoo · 1 year

Text

Jungkook: Clingy 🔞 [Part 4]

In which your soup makes him cry, but he's glad you can't see it at least.

Tags/Warnings: Hybrid AU, Wolf hybrid!Jungkook, Otter hybrid!Reader, Angst, strangers to ???

Additional Chapter Warnings: Good soup 🤌, Jungkook has some serious emotional constipation, angst, wolfboy is in denial, fluff?

-> Masterlist

♥━━━━━━━━━━━♡━━━━━━━━━━━━♥

He wakes up alone in bed, and for a moment, he's unsure if he's actually awake or dreaming.

The room is dipped in an almost golden glow, body cushioned by all the different blankets and pillows in the bed he's sleeping in. There's a faint smell of food, something metallic clattering onto the floor - a piercing sound that makes his ears flick towards the origin.

He turns to see a sheepishly smiling you, clad in comfy clothing, tail tucked between your legs from what he assumes must be the shock of the loud noise. "Sorry. I didn't mean to wake you." You say, and he sits up at that, running a hand through his hair. "You looked too peaceful sleeping, and, you know, I technically still have today so.." You tell him before picking up the spoon that had fallen out of your hands.

"What time is it?" He wonders more or less to himself, moving around to grab underwear from his bag at the side of the bed, feeling an odd sense of dread and disappointment in his bones.

"Around 4 PM." You tell him, turning around to put the now washed cutlery away, while he packs his bag silently. Usually, this would be a time of finally breathing again, another job done, a new month's salary added. But somehow, he feels dread, like he's disappointed your heat had ended so quickly - even though it wasn't quick at all. You've rented him for a full week plus a buffer day if needed, and he knew that right from the start.

You didn't even rent him. If fate had played its cards differently, he wouldn't have even met you ever.

You paid for him. Nothing more and nothing less.

"So uh.." You awkwardly start as he stands in front of you a few minutes later, all dressed and ready to leave. "I really don't know how this.. uhm. Yeah." You stammer before shrugging. "Thank you? Is that what you say?"

"No problem, it's my job after all." He responds, though he spots the faint realization on your face as he says that. It's odd how it makes you look just as disappointed as he feels. "But I enjoyed it anyways."

"Uh.. thanks?" You say, cheeks red while he walks to the door. "Oh, wait!" You call out, running to get something out of your fridge. "You didn't have anything to eat yet, and you said you can't cook well.. so you can have my leftover soup from today." You tell him, giving a pink plastic container to him, one he carefully holds. "Just.. you can keep the Tupperware box, I have a lot." You tell him, and he doesn't know how to properly decline. You're a client, and he doesn't even eat soup-

"Thank you." He says, bowing politely before he leaves your apartment behind him, door closing quietly-

But he still stops in his tracks the second he hears the click of the lock, time standing still for a little while. The container in his hands is cold, biting at his skin, and only after a moment does he carefully place it somewhere in his bag where it can't cause any mishap.

Climbing into the van provided by the company, the driver greets him just like always. "How are you?" He asked, only getting a hum as a reply since Jungkook busies himself with stretching his limbs. "Damn, I picked up Tae today from a similar street. Takes me back to the times when you both were still new." The man chuckles, and Jungkook just shrugs, looking outside the window.

It's true that the scenery looks nostalgic almost, though right now, the wolf hybrid doesn't want to dwell on it any longer. He just wants to go home, sleep well, and enjoy his free time.

His apartment is cold but familiar, comforting as he lets his bag drop to the ground, typical routine starting. But when he stands in front of his shower, he hesitates- he's showered at your place already, there's no need to do it a second time. He'd almost always shower again here at his place to get any scents off of him, but he doesn't actually mind the strawberry vanilla scented bodywash still clinging to his skin.

Or was that your scent?

He's unsure, rather opting to take out the container of soup from his bag to put into the microwave, carefully keeping an eye on it in case the container isn't safe for those temperatures. Filling the contents into a bowl, he sits in front of his TV, boring drama, playing more or less as background noise if anything else as he eats the first spoonfuls of your cooking. It warms up his body, fills him with comfort, and has a soft sense of nostalgia as he watches the screen in front of him.

Until he notices his vision blurring, heavy blinking only forcing the tears to fall.

He's confused. Why is he crying right now? He doesn't even feel particularly sad at all. Nothing is wrong, he's not sick, and neither does it feel like he's allergic to anything in your cooking. There's emotions in his head that just don't make sense at all, and he hates it.

Why does he miss you?

The soup is good, great even, your cooking is absolutely perfect in that it's not perfect at all. There's no expensive spices or ingredients used, just the traditional vegetables and a bit of chicken like he remembers his aunt making whenever he got sick.

He sighs after he finishes the small meal, sitting back on his couch to just exist for a moment, head empty before it fills with you again. Would you spend your next heat with one of the lower ranking workers next time? Possibly, if you won't find a permanent partner before then. He can't imagine that being too hard for you. After all, he's pretty sure he'd choose you as a lover in a heartbeat if he was ever to be asked.

His eyes widen as he realizes what he'd just thought.

As if burned, he jumps up from the couch, taking his cutlery and bowl with him to wash everything in his sink, your pink Tupperware container included. He needs to give that back to you. He needs to return it, and he needs it out of his apartment and out of his life.

And most of all, he needs to get you out of his head.

#bts imagine #bts fanfic #bts fic #jungkook imagine #jeon jungkook x reader #jungkook imagines #hybrid imagine #hybrid au #hybrid reader #hybrid jungkook imagine

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storiesofleftoverghosts · 1 year

Text

dating the batboys... and their Taylor Swift songs (1/2)

pairings: Bruce Wayne x GN!Reader, Dick Grayson x GN!Reader

warnings: none

requested?: nope!

a/n: FOR SOME REASON MY TUMBLR ACTED UP AND POSTED ONE OF MY DRAFTS OH MY GOD IM SO EMBARRASSED. but of course my first work is Taylor Swift related. for those wondering, i don’t know if i’ll be doing romantic Damian Wayne anytime soon. just feels a bit weird. anyway! also I just wanted to get something out for people to see my writing style. expect part two with Jason and Tim tomorrow.

Bruce Wayne

as much as I love Bruce, I’m 100% a believer that it would be somewhat difficult to be in a relationship with him

i mean look at his taste in partners...

of course it’s because he’s Batman and he’s a secret vigilante blah blah blah

but also because he is Bruce Wayne!

THE BRUCE WAYNE

he is literally Kim Kardashian status people

which means if you start dating him, you’re going to have to constantly deal with paparazzi, people digging into your personal life, etc.

and that’s just the surface level

the man has a lot of undealt with trauma and doesn’t believe he deserves love

plus he’s not one to open up about his emotions

I’d feel like there’d be a lot of arguments where Bruce goes too far trying to be protective because he doesn’t want to lose you but he doesn’t explicitly say that so he comes off as being a dick

do not expect this man to verbally apologize if you get into any arguments

he’ll apologize to you in his own way of course

if he was injured while on his nightly duties, he would distance himself from you while he healed (before you found out he was Batman)

would hesitantly let you patch him up because he doesn’t want you to see him as weak (after you find out)

once you do find out about his double life, expect Bruce to forbid you from trying to become a vigilante

he’s lost friends, past lovers, hell eventually even his own son

he would not let you do anything involving it and that’s finally

sorry dude

but it’s not too bad

Bruce loves you with his full heart

and he would do just about anything for you

no doubt in my mind this man would spoil you rotten

getting to see the somewhat soft side of Bruce more often than anyone else

not too big on PDA but once it’s just you two, this man cannot keep his hands to himself

going to one of his galas once you guys publicly announce your relationship and getting slightly overwhelmed from it all

him pulling you off to the side and making sure you’re okay

Alfred becoming a good friend of yours

once he fully trusts you and believes you to be his one and only, i think he’d tell you about his other life

or maybe you just accidentally stumble into the batcave

anyway i think he’d either put you in self-defense classes or teach you because it’s gotham and he can’t risk you getting hurt

he’d probably feel like he could never give you the peaceful life you deserve but he could never give up being batman

just understand that he’s an emotionally constipated man but he truly is head over heels for you

With all this considered I want to say that Dancing With Our Hands Tied (from Reputation) and peace (from folklore) are the best songs that would describe being with Bruce.

“People started talking, putting us through our paces I knew there was no one in the world who could take it I had a bad feeling

But we were dancing, dancing with our hands tied.”

Seeing the tabloids, the color drained from your face. You thought you would have more time before the press started trying to figure out who you were. No, you thought you and Bruce were being careful, sneaking around. But clearly not careful enough. There was your picture, on the front cover of one of the most popular magazines in Gotham. You couldn’t ignore the big bold letters already accusing you of using Bruce.

A shaky breath escaped your lips as you set the magazines down on the table. You were so caught up in your thoughts you hadn’t heard footsteps approaching you until you felt strong arms wrap around your waist. Your eyes fell shut as you leaned into Bruce’s soft and warm touch. For a second, it was like every thought left your mind at once. It was surprising the effect Bruce had on you.

Bruce’s eyes traveled down to what you had set down. He rolled his eyes once he read what the magazines had already started to say about you. It would be a lie if he had said he was surprised the paparazzi had already found out about you. He knew it would only be a matter of time before they found out, especially with just how famous he was.

However, he was more worried about you. He felt a twinge of guilt shoot through his heart. It was his fault after all you were now in the spotlight. He was used to being in it, especially from such a young age. But sometimes not even he can handle being under the constant watch of the public eye. No one can.

Of course, Bruce was also nervous about you. If you were going to stay or not. This had always been a deal breaker for his past relationships. Well besides the fact of him being a vigilante. But normally they didn’t last that long for him to even think of telling his partner. However, you were different. You were someone who challenged him to think differently, and you constantly believed there was good in people, no matter what. He didn’t want to lose you. He just had a bad feeling. He squeezed a little bit tighter, but not too much to hurt you.

“If you’re worried I’m going to leave, don’t be. I knew exactly what I was signing up for when I agreed to go out with you.” You turned to face him and cupped his cheek. He almost melted into your touch. He looked into your loving eyes. He didn’t have to say anything, but you knew that he was just as much in love with you as you were with him.

Dick Grayson

Dick is a very complex character

this man is also traumatized

his trauma is not talked about enough by the fandom and its sad

I would say that he’s moved past it, but it’s also left its scars (like trauma does)

he’s just so used to trying to make everyone happy he forgets to take care of his own feelings (im not projecting shut up)

but after being friends for a while and he starts dating you, you’d see right through him

him constantly deflecting his emotions with comedy because the man doesn’t like to be in uncomfortable situations and feelings are uncomfortable

he’s a stubborn man so you’d have to be an even more stubborn person to try and make him change his mind in an argument

but even then sometimes there’s nothing that could change his mind

having a heart attack because this man doesn’t tend to think before jumps

however, he is such a sweetheart when it comes to relationships

he’s always putting you before himself

don’t let him push you away because he thinks he’s protecting you

always asking about your day and genuinely being interested in whatever you have to say

man’s gets literally heart eyes whenever you open your mouth

he is so big on PDA!

he’s always holding your hand or has an arm wrapped around your shoulder when you go out into public

being in awe of how flexible he can bend his body

until he pranks you by bending over backwards and running at you

“THAT WAS NOT FUNNY I ALMOST KICKED YOU” “it was funny to me and that’s what matters”

being Dick Grayson and Nightwing makes his life hectic, but he always makes time for you

not being too surprised when you eventually find out he is Nightwing

due to the fact when you’d go out by yourself, Nightwing would always happen to “bump” into you and would make sure you’d get to your destination safely

you knew those quips and that laugh from anywhere

turning anything you two do together into a date

whenever he notices you are not taking care of yourself or are just having a bad day, he does self care days with you

you doing the same for him

he doesn’t have as bad of overprotective issues as Bruce does

but he still has lost so many people in his life so of course he’s gonna be terrified of losing you like that

I just don’t think he’d let it control him

he’s so in love with you it’s not even funny

Okay so I’m so confident in my answer when I say that Paper Rings (from Lover) and The Archer (from Lover) are so Dick Grayson it’s not even funny. He’s just Lover coded, I don’t know what to tell y’all!

“I like shiny things, but I'd marry you with paper rings

Uh huh, that's right

Darling, you're the one I want, and

I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this

Uh huh, that's right

Darling, you’re the one I want”

“Dick!” You laughed and quickly turned your head away to not get hit with the paper wrapper from the straw he had blown towards you. He had missed his target, and the wrapper fell on the recently mopped checked floor. You shot a playful glare at him and stuck your red straw into your shared milkshake. He gave you one of his iconic smiles, putting his straw into the milkshake too.

The two of you were currently sitting in a big red booth in a 24/7 dinner at three in the morning. The smell of greasy food had filled the air, but it was quickly becoming a comfort smell to you. This had recently become a weekly thing between Dick and you. Whenever you both just couldn’t fall asleep, you’d find yourselves at the diner, talking about anything and everything under the sun. What can you say? The city never sleeps and neither do you two.

Your eyes wandered to the city lights outside. For once, Blüdhaven seemed still, as if it were frozen in time. Your mind wandered as you began to think how you ended up here in the first place. You had been friends with Dick since you were kids, always glued at the hip. It was no surprise feelings had started to develop as you grew older and as the days grew on, it had gotten harder to keep from him.

That was until one night, he showed up at your apartment drunk. Dick was never one to hold his liquor well. You had begrudgingly dragged him in and made a bed for him on the couch. It was then he started to spout out how he’s loved you since you were teenagers and how he couldn’t imagine his life without you. He then begged you not to leave and pulled you on the soft couch with him. It was hard to say no, so you didn’t and enjoyed the silence.

The next morning, you and Dick had a heart to heart and opened up about each others feelings to each other. Since that day, you’ve been stuck like glue to each other. When he wanted to leave to Blüdhaven, you were right behind him and moved in with him. It was funny to think that if it hadn’t been for that drunken “accident”, you wouldn’t have been where you are.

Feeling something being slid on your finger, you snapped out of your thoughts and looked down. It was a thin paper ring made from the straw wrapper. You looked up and stared into the ocean blue eyes that stared right back.

“Someday, it will be an actual ring.” Dick smiled and reached for your hand. You smiled and let him hold your hand, taking in just now warm and soft his hand was. It felt like home to you. You softly squeezed it, and took a sip from your milkshake. For now, this small paper ring would be more than enough for you.

#bruce wayne x reader #batman x reader #dick grayson x reader #nightwing x reader #fanfiction #x reader #taylor swift #taylor swift inspired #elliessodashop

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lemmetreatya · 1 year

Text

photographer!jotaro whos used to taking photos of industry professionals, actors, singers, nepo babies — the lot! it’s almost second nature to him.

there’s never a doubt of how to do his work because the lens photographer!jotaro sees people through is contrary to how his eyes do. photographer!jotaro finds everyone fickle; it’s the camera he has to give credit due when given accolade.

but when you, his personal muse, tells him that maybe he should try being on the other end of the lens in order to broaden his view of photography, he gets defensive, almost grumpy about the suggestion.

“dont piss me off.” he mumbles at the computer screen, albeit with no bite to it.

you playfully huff because you know photographer!jotaro well enough by now to know he wasnt angry at you. with a hand that aimlessly plays with the hairs on his neck, you pout down at him as he does his work.

“but i’m being for reeeeal. you gotta try it so that you have something over other photographers. have the experience of being a subject.”

photographer!jotaro moves his chair back so that he can retrieve a file from underneath his desk. an implicit notion for you to unhand him and dead the topic.

“i already have something over them and that’s my skill. i dont need to be on the other end to get more of it.”

rolling your eyes, you move away from the man. if it was one thing that frizzled you about photographer!jotaro was his lack of inquisitive spirit.

“jotaro, why should i let myself be your muse if you cant even be one for yourself? honestly, if you dont wanna take pictures for you at least do it for me.”

there’s a whine in your voice but photographer!jotaro knows you’re being serious. hes had a taste of your wrath before and he wasn’t a fan of it. still, photographer!jotaro was a man of peace before he was a man of resilience. maybe if this was back when he was much younger, he would have shrugged you off and told you to get on with your day. but photographer!jotaro’s tasted a bit of life and you’re one of the only sweet things in it. he’d be an idiot to throw it away because of pride.

reluctantly, photographer!jotaro lets you pick a location for the shoot but he’s already regretting giving you the reigns on such a delicate art process. of course you’re picking your bedroom with low lighting and neon lights.

“jotaro, you’ve got to at least look relax! right now you just look constipated.”

photographer!jotaros struggling to relax because you’re pointing the lens right at him but he tries his best to adhere. however, no matter what way he turns, twists and folds, you’re seemingly unimpressed with his form. leaving the camera on its tripod, you crawl up your bed

“you’ve gotta…” you huff as you move his limbs around for him, quickly removing his signature hat from his head. “seem like you want to be here. act like you’re lazy or something i dunno…”

photographer!jotaro grunts as you alter his look but he doesn’t protest much. hes more enamoured by the sweet smell of your perfume that infiltrates his nose and the warm heat from your body that flushes onto his. automatically his hands have rested on your waist and suddenly photographer!jotaro is very aware hes got you ontop of him in your bed.

you dont even realise photographer!jotaro‘s advances until hes flipped you onto your back and begun leaving damp kisses up the side of your neck.

(un)surprisingly, you have no qualms about the situation yourself as you’re mewling for the man to do more, touch more

photographer!jotaro ends up slow fucking you into the plush of your bed, his strokes long and languid as he never fails to leave you full of him.

“j-jojo…” your arms encase around his large frame and so do your legs. everything about him is all just so big. “the…shoot…”

“dont care.” he grumbles into the blunt of your ear shell, his teeth biting at the soft bone.

your moans call upwards between the four walls of your bedroom, the sounds mesmerising to photographer!jotaro as he hilts his cock deep inside you. he wasnt much of a loud guy, bar for his soppy pants of your name, but his hand never failed to find your as he entwined them both.

photographer!jotaro pulls out with enough time to spare. hes a careful man nowadays — learnt from a lot of prior experiences — but he doesn’t fail to keep your lips connected as he fucks his cock in the fist of his hand and over your stomachs with a solid grunt.

although photographer!jotaro knows that you’re still yet to reach a high and so he brings his fingers down to pet and rub at your clit. he swallows your every mewl and worships you with “well dones” once he feels you clench and pulse over his pads.

no pictures of any kind were taken that day, but photographer!jotaro knows its a memory he’ll forever keep with him.

#jotaro scenarios #jotaro imagines #jotaro headcanons #jotaro x reader #jotaro kujo #jotaro x black reader #part 4 jotaro #sdc #jojo part 3 #stardust crusaders #jjba #jojos bizarre adventure

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kimbap-r0ll · 1 year

Note

For the event, could I request 🍣 with Ruggie, Malleus and Jamil?

Congratulations 🎉

Hi, thank you for the ask! I'm getting started again with uni, so thank you for the patience!

Follower Event: Ruggie, Malleus, Jamil with "I don't want you to get lost, I don't want you to go broke, I want you"

Ruggie

It's true that this man is an extreme troublemaker that almost every student in the school has been victim of one of his pranks. However, he's also extremely caring to the people he likes. You were one of those lucky few that never got their katsu sandwiches stolen from them

He doesn't have a clear way of showing his emotions, mainly because he's never been able to tell the truth directly (it feels awkward for him). Because of that, he tends to show you his feelings through his actions. He'll get you something you really wanted from Sam's shop for example.

Ruggie's also very protective, which stems from his childhood and his current status as a brother of probably all the kids in his neighborhood. He wants to keep you from crying, from anything that might hurt you, so he actually keeps an eye out for you a lot. You might be able to catch him staring at you during spelldrive practice!

Overall, he really wants to continue being with you no matter what, and the way he does this is by making sure you are taken care of. Be sure to let him know you appreciate all that he does for you!

Malleus

Before you two were dating, you probably noticed a lot of things that you needed or wanted mysteriously showing up at your dorm. First you thought it was creepy, or perhaps a weird joke from Ace. But after a few weeks of this happening, you started to like it. Turns out it was the fae prince who couldn't bring up the courage to actually tell you how he feels about you

He's probably the most protective guy there is in all of Twisted Wonderland. He doesn't know why, but whenever you're with him he finds himself at peace. He doesn't have to feel like he might scare you away or that you're with him only because of his status. You see him for who he is, and that just makes you even more precious to him. Because of all of these factors however, he tends to be overprotective of you. Expect him to keep an arm around you when you two go on walks

He's a fae who is interested in human culture, but he has very little knowledge on what helps you when you're sick or stressed out. He's tries his best, and honestly it's the effort that counts. You two have definitely laughed a few times when he brings the most random things to help you out (ie a flamingo float)

He's also someone who's not the best at communicating his feelings. He's usually super good at being eloquent with his words, but he tends to keep his mouth shut when he sees you (he's just nervous). That's one reason why he tends to show you his affection through his actions a lot more

Jamil

Extremely emotionally constipated. He's said things that are meant to be helpful or show that he's caring for you but it sometimes comes off as condescending. Let him know that it doesn't sound right and he'll try his best to keep that in mind. Understand he wants the best for you, but he's still lacking in nice words :/

Jamil's extremely observant, so observant he'll know exactly what kinds of gifts or food to give you on certain occasions. You might not even be sick but be prepared for some hot soup from him and a few words on taking care of yourself

He definitely wants you to be treated like a princess, probably because that's the only form of affection he's really seen. Growing up in a rich house as a servant he's seen Kalim receive presents from his family more than anything else, and to him that's what means "caring" for someone is like. Remind him that there's more to love that just materials when you two are first starting out and he'll start to open up to you a bit more

He really likes you for making him feel like something more than just a servant, but he really has a hard time expressing that or breaking out of the shell that he's comfortable in (which is just giving stuff). You can help him out by giving him some time or by giving him gifts of your own (though you might see Jamil flustered and run off to his room right away haha)

#follower event #anon ask #gn!reader #twst #twisted wonderland #twst imagines #twst scenarios #twst headcanons #twst x reader #twst ruggie #twst ruggie x reader #twst malleus #twst malleus x reader #twst jamil #twst jamil x reader #twst ruggie bucchi #twst jamil viper #twst malleus draconia

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magadauthan · 1 month

Text

Ep 19: Hang Fire

*Stefon voice* This episode has everything.

Vash and WW acting like a couple of morons

A glimpse into Meryl and Milly's everyday life

Meryl on her way to freakin' go get her man

Vash in civvies (that button-down!)

A catchy song

V/M emotional constipation (catnip!!!)

OK @trigun98watchparty, let's begin the killing time recap.

--It's perfect that Meryl's friend is named Karen, because that mole near her mouth means she's a gossip. She does seem to care about Meryl, though. Wants her to get married and everything.

--Ofc her officemates want to hear all the skinny on her interactions with Vash the Stampede. Wouldn't you?

--Look how happy Meryl is. She's gonna find Vash and give him all the kisses a very stern talking-to. It's official, Meryl and Milly are off to the DIrty Jerz.

--Awwww, the bike broke down again. This is tip-top, grade-A, prime bickering between Vash and WW. "Actually, I'm dissing you, not your stupid broken motorcycle!" It's not Trigun if these two aren't squawking at each other.

--What the hell kind of nasty-ass spaghetti are they eating? It looks like it has Spam in it. That is just wrong. (yeah, I know, spaghetti western.) And WW gets stuck with the check, just like Vash threatened.

--The girls are so cute in their PJ's. I love that we know what most of the main characters wear to bed. (I bet WW wears the rattiest underpants you ever saw, with a tank undershirt.)

--I love that Vash has old friends all over the place. He and Max (and probably Doc) went out for Obi-Wan and Anakin-style Wild Adventures and probably ripped it up wherever they went.

--It has to be incredibly hard on Vash to watch his friends get older while he stays the same.

--Meryl will KICK YOU in the NUTS. < / cartman > Nice subverted panty shot, though it doesn't come through in English. Good luck "having fun" with Meryl or Milly.

--"Total slaughter, total slaughter..."

--WW and his noodles, best silly face

--let's all take several moments to appreciate Vash's extreme hotness in his white button-down

--"Luck and persistence won't work forever." Especially with you conniving with Legato and co. to force his hand, eh, WW?

--"Tee hee, ma'am is so happy to see him. I'll give them a couple minutes alone."

--Vash/Meryl fanciers: Take a moment to go read "Biting My Tongue" and then come back.

--Vash and Meryl (at this point, anyway) could never admit in a thousand years that they might have missed one another. Meanwhile, WW likely took one look at Milly: "Big Girl! I missed you!" "I missed you too, Mr. Priest, it's so nice to see you again!" "I have a couple extra double dollars, do you want to go get some ice cream?" "That would be so nice of you, Mr. Priest! Yay!"

--Domo arigatou, Mr. Legato...

Thinking back on it... Vash starts to show a renewed determination to push back after his time with Grandma Sheryl and Lina. For two years (the anime is fuzzy on this so I'm using manga timeline) he got to be who he wanted to be - just another silly guy, living his life, doing ordinary things and being happy. No one knew whether he was alive, and he was able to live in peace. Which is pretty much all Vash genuinely wants. Without his brother chasing him and pulling the strings, he was able to accomplish that.

Vash has had a taste of what his life could be like without Knives being a dick to him all the time. So... what is he going to do about it?

#trigun #trigun 98 #trigun 98 watch party #Day 19 #hang fire #vash the stampede #nicholas d. wolfwood #meryl stryfe #milly thompson #vashmeryl #please let vash have nice things

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valentine-writes · 2 years

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Hello hello!!! I heard you were taking request so...

May I please have some HCs about how GR Freddy and the rest of the gang would be as S/Os? 👉👈

i could use a love of some kind

↳ ft. the glamrocks + sun/sunnydrop, and moon/moondrop

「 gn! reader, romantic relationship <3 」

author's note: the song iz just.... so sweet ^_^ i thought it would b nice 2 listen 2 while writing this, so i added it so u can listen while u read!!!! if u wanna!!!!! ty anon 4 tha fun req, and i apologize 4 not writing it sooner luv <3 also he/it moondrop my fav ever.....

GLAMROCK CHICA headcanons:

▸ she's your best friend before anything else. the minute she met you, she couldn't help but get attached

▸ ultra energetic whenever you're with her. your presence really refreshes her. can't help but be buzzed with energy when she's with you

▸ chica is beyond sappy. you two are an adorable duo, it's undeniable- but man do roxy and monty tease you so much. this does Not Stop chica at all

▸ enjoys being physically close. you don't even have to be actually touching- even like. sitting near her makes her happy

▸ adores you. chica is the best hype girl ever and will b ur cheerleader when u need it!!! gives you that extra bit of motivation when you need it.

▸ she may not be all that threatening, which is expected, since she's sweet as sugar and incredibly friendly- but swears she would throw hands for you.

▸ likes receiving gifts! even if it's something small and simple like a trinket, giving her something tells her you were thinking of her. small gestures like that mean the world to her

more hcs under the cut !!

GLAMROCK FREDDY headcanons:

▸ in my head, the healthiest relationships you could have are with chica and freddy. i think it's mainly because these two aren't so emotionally constipated- for lack of better term (´꒳｀;)

▸ so completely genuine and honest. willing to communicate when there's something wrong and is very gentle w/ u

▸ that being said, maybe he's just a little. tiny bit. protective. not incredibly or overwhelmingly, but definitely needs to know that you're doing well for his peace of mind.

▸ pays attention to you. remembers the little things you tell him about yourself. he especially likes hearing about what type of music you enjoy! if there's anyone who knows your music taste as well as you- it's him

▸ likes dancing with you!!! idk why i just feel like this is a thing. if you insist you can't dance- he'll try to teach you!!!! (he wants 2 spend more time with you so badly (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ) freddy's rly trying <;/3)

▸ incredibly patient with you. if you're in emotional distress of some sort, always willing to comfort you first.

▸ secretly gets very nervous around you. he has this natural ability to have good conversational skills, doesn't have trouble getting along with others, and is generally likeable- he doubts ALL OF THAT around you. just a little. he seems to falter or get flustered very easily. freddy gets a little shy around u aw ^_^

ROXANNE WOLF headcanons:

▸ her insecurities can sometimes turn into jealousy- roxy just needs that extra bit of reassurance when it happens, she just wants to be good enough for you </3

▸ it's a little hard for her to let her pride down and actually express her emotions for you. her "i love you"s are often in the form of gestures and not verbal

▸ only ever really shows her soft side to you. it takes some time but she really does seem to melt around you. she's scared of being overly vulnerable with you- but give her time and you'll be the first person she opens up to when she needs some comfort

▸ WOOO SCARY ROBOT WOLF GF PRIVILEGES!!! if you ever feel in danger or uncomfortable in a situation, roxy 2 tha rescue!!!!! :] if someone's messing with you, they're gonna have to deal with her.

▸ she just thinks you're the cutest thing to ever be on the face of planet earth. likes watching your face light up when you tell her about things that you're passionate about- even likes how expressive you get when talking about things you despise. a good listener when you need one.

▸ compliments. so many. just casually. she wants to appreciate you like you appreciate her. she's a little bad at giving them at the start but give it time. they're from a place of sincerity.

▸ misses you very easily when you're not around. you could be gone for a day and the next time she sees you, she'll act like you've been away for decades.

MONTGOMERY GATOR headcanons:

▸ ough boy i write for this silly guy so so much. i am runnin outta monty juice but oh babey!!!! u two are just tha perf pair

▸ actually starting the relationship was the hardest part..... he's kind of emotionally guarded. slowly but surely he learns that he can trust you

▸ it might not be easy at the start- like, actually trying to get to know him. he's got some issues with anger and is very short tempered. little things throughout the day irritate him so much and he takes his anger out by thrashing his room and on people who don't deserve it.

▸ if he ever gets mean to you becuz of this anger tho?? oh man. he'll struggle through a million apologies just to make you feel better again. he wants to be nice 2 u, really. he's not bad. just a little troubled :(

▸ once he trusts you, you're one of the only people he's really soft for. you really just melt him into a sappy puddle. but also. still wants 2 b cool in ur eyes. so tries to hide it. (it does not work!!!!! he cannot hide how much he adores u)

▸ you get a million names and are always called them. like. always. so much so that like the entire pizzaplex probably thinks ur lil nickname from him is ur legal name. he likes recieving sweet little nicknames too :] however. he loves to hear your voice saying his name most.

▸ bonus: when talkin abt when u first saw each other, he's all like "it was love at first sight ;]" and ur like "...u looked like u wanted 2 kill me the first time we met." he recalls being absolutely head over heels. you recall how he stared intensely as you walked past, wondering what you had done to make him glare daggers ur way. (he remembers that heart eyes were practically forming under his shades. perhaps thats for him 2 know.)

SUNDROP headcanons:

▸ ok so he's fully and completely in love. his words, not mine. probably because that was one of the first things he said when meeting you. kidding! i think. but it's certainly no secret sunny liked you the minute you met. and how couldn't he?

▸ he tried so hard just to be friends with you. drew you a million drawings of you and him holding hands just to get the message across. guess it worked eventually!! and better than he thought it would <3

▸he puts so much effort into the relationship you two have- he secretly fears being replaced for someone better but shh its not the main reason he does all this- because he's never had this type of thing with anyone. he make sures to cherish you and give you all the attention and care you need. you will never go neglected by sun.

▸ you will however, have to be there for him too. he can get a little erratic and he needs someone to get him to calm down. offering him some patience and time is really all he asks for when he's being a little much.

▸ physically affectionate!!! so much!!!! he's not very shy about wanting a hug 24/7 or holding your hand- but if you aren't a very touchy person, he understands!! looming over your shoulder like a terrifying shadow works for him too. he just wants u there with him.

▸ knows every little detail about your likes and dislikes! keeps a list probably. just like. a t-chart with one side that says "good! fun!" and the other that says "ick! not enjoyed >:[ !!" stuff like favorite colour, genres of music you listen to, movies you love are there, yeah- but there's also like. specifics. incredibly niche details about yourself you've mentioned once or twice which he will keep and remember! the list was just for sun to keep track of what could be good conversation starters to talk to you when you two first met aw

▸ can get a little protective. again, he's a bit worried he's too much for you, or that you'll find someone better. he doesn't get jealous in a possessive sense but he def needs a bit of reassurance. he'd hate to be something replacable in your eyes. this is the first time someone has cared for him like this- losing you would hurt more than anything in the world.

MOONDROP headcanons:

▸ BASTARD WHO STICKS HIS COLD METAL HANDS ON THE BACK OF UR NECK. it's his way of showing affection. or bothering u. same thing when it comes to moon /hj

▸ i don't know how you managed. but hey congrats. you're stuck with it now! and moon fully intends to let you know that. clingy, yes- but not in the way sunny is. ok. kind of like how sun is. but more of the "looming-over-your-shoulder-like-a-terrifying-shadow" sense rather than the cuddles and handholding.

▸yes, when the lights are out, he will be following you around. he likes being in your presence. he doesn't undestand what draws him to you at first, but finds himself trailing your footsteps often. (this is. very anxiety inducing for you, who probably hadn't even talked to him at this point. like?? where are those weird bell noises coming from?? are those... eyes in the distance or- oh no wait it's gone in a blur wtf)

▸ though very reluctant to talk to anyone, you two somehow become close. it likes the fact you never really gave up on it- despite the fact it can be a bit offputting and unnerving.

▸ likes picking you up. greeting ritual where moon just kinda- hoists you into the air on sight. he decends down on his wire when he sees you enter and just. swoop.

"hi."

▸ will fight and kill and murder and bite and slaughter for you- just. your dynamic:

moon: why do you think i don’t like you? i do. i would kill for you.

moon: ask me to kill for you.

you: ...first of all, calm down-

^^THATZ U TWO. ITS CANON NOW. so like... yeah his chill is. very low. moon just tends to be very intense in every way possible and it shows. he's got the right intentions (for the most part) with all his fervour. he puts all that energy into showing you and letting you know you are loved and safe with him :] no one will hurt you. no one can.

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dent-de-leon · 22 days

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You said something about Hades AU and all I can think about of emotionally constipated Hades!Caleb and full of life and joy Persephone!Molly kahxbagd

!! Oh this is so sweet ; ; The image of Tealeaf as both a denizen of the underworld and god of spring after being resurrected amidst all the Wildmother’s flowers and greenery—spring as rebirth, life after death. The way Yasha described Molly as color and life in the midst of a barren wasteland where nothing grew—oh I love this for him, it warms my whole heart.

And Caleb who’s always had a longing to reach out to those he lost, always tried to turn back time and bring his loved ones back—always being kind to the dead. Caleb listening attentively to every shade he meets, trying to make them comfortable and give them peace. A safe place to rest. Caleb knowing better than anyone that the dead can never truly escape the Underworld, but…a part of him is still young and foolish, still hopes—

And the reason Persephone leaves home in the first game still breaks my whole heart. And as for what would drive Molly to leave—I don’t know that he’d intend to stay away forever, but. If Molly/King started to recover fleeting memories of his last life, I think at a certain point he’d try to make it to the world above.

Like how Kingsley needed a bit of distance at first, needed to rediscover himself before he was truly ready to let himself be vulnerable and open with his family. King finally working up the courage to face his past, “Finally reads that book, and goes to visit. And learn.”

Tealeaf starting to wake from too many nightmares and familiar dreams. Stumbling across Beau’s journal and can’t help being curious, needing to know more. Realizing he wants to reconcile with the past. Tealeaf trying to run away and steal a ship upriver to the surface, telling himself it’s not forever. Caleb never once trying to stop him, ready to let go if that’s what his Circus Man needs—but also knowing that death has claimed him too many times already, that the Matron’s threads can’t be undone.

Caleb still writing Molly letters for when he finally comes home. Holding onto his old coat. Keeping a spare room in the Tower always ready for him. Waiting for reunion—

#oh thank you I love this ; ; it’s such a sweet thought #widomauk as gods who are both bound to the underworld but molly still carries #a vibrancy and life and color with him that reminds Caleb of the world above he was exiled from long ago #molly bringing life and color back to Caleb and yahsa’a world #the way nothing grows and all the flowers start to wilt when tealeaf runs away #Caleb knowing he wont last long on the surface anyway but. trying to help him escape all the same—#anyway I love this game and also the circus man and magic man :’)

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cuntstable · 4 months

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I know you're currently obsessed with Dunmeshi, but there's an aspect about Stocean I really can't get over...

Jotaro is such a shitty father. I don't give a damn if he cares about his daughter so much, I literally can't imagine him as a good father if he wasn't absent. If Jolyne had gotten to deck him at least once in the story, maybe I would've forgiven him. The fact that there are SOOOO many JoJo fans who defend Jotaro being an absent father makes me go nuts. Maybe it's because I have trauma relating to my own father but still. Jotaro, (a.k.a Mr. Misogyny himself), truly doesn't deserve an amazing daughter like Jolyne.

I still love Stocean mind you, but Christ I don't care how tragic the Kujo family is, Jolyne deserves a better dad.

yeah i feel like a lot of jojo fans DO struggle to accept that even if jotaro did do it out of what he believed were Good reasons he still deeply hurt and scarred jolyne by abandoning her. like ultimately his intentions are secondary to the very real trauma and pain he caused his daughter. thats the real tragedy, and jolyne ultimately forgiving him doesnt absolve him of that mistake

im a bit conflicted on the story aspect of it because on the other hand jolyne gaining peace with her childhood and her relationship with her father after learning his reasons for leaving is i think a really beautiful and touching character development moment for her. it also fits the theme of Memory in stocean, since its effectively her recontextualizing her memories of her father and of her abandonment and thus gaining strenght from them. but i DO also really wish we had gotten more of her being angry and conflicted about it before finding peace with that fact. i can personally definitely relate to how hurt and angry she was when jotaro first visited her in jail (mr. misogony father 2…..) but the switch between her hating him and forgiving him feels very fast considering the lifetime of pain between them. like i wish araki had let her express that anger and sadness more

also i AGREE that its a bit dumb how a lot of jojo fans swear that if it wasnt for jotaro leaving because of the stand stuff and his trauma with losing his loved ones to it he would have been a good dad. like be serious……. hes still an incredibly emotionally distant and emotionally constipated man who clearly has a Not Great way of showing affection for his loved ones (with holly for example, he loves his mom more than anything in p3 but still cant openly accept affection from her or show it in return), not to mention his misogony….. like theres no world where jotaros and jolynes relationship would have been perfect or uncomplicated, and i think thats a part of their tragedy and what makes jolyne such a sad yet strong character

#also even if im obsessed with other stuff stocean is NEVERRR leaving my brain…. ill always discuss it rest assured….#jojo

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shnargo · 2 years

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I saw your soulmate alphabet thing and I have to say I love every single thing about it!

I was thinking maybe a Marc / Steven x Reader with the prompt "nurse". Maybe Marc/Steven save the reader from a situation were they end up hurt?

Thank you!! ❤️

peace. [s.g. & m.s.]

pairings: steven grant x reader, marc spector x reader // reader is gender neutral & soulmates!! 🥺

summary: Though the first time meeting you was unconventional, Marc finds himself drawn to you. Despite his apprehension, and with some convincing from Steven, he allows himself a chance.

warnings: mild descriptions of injuries and implications of kidnapping in the beginning, otherwise, primarily fluff :) also set after the events of the moon knight show but there's very little spoilers.

word count: 3489

a/n: this took me way too long to write since it's been awhile since i've written anything frankly. and no problem, love!! i love the soulmate trope a lot too. 💕

when the other isn't fronting, they speak in italics.

n…urse (the touch of a soulmate can heal you from affliction and vice versa).

With hands that maimed and shed so much blood, Marc resigned himself to the fact that he'd never find peace. As long as he'd be Khonshu's avatar, he'd never escape the killings and despair it brought. And though it brought him some solace knowing those he was assigned to murder were only the worst of humanity, it didn't spare the fact that it was, in the end, murder.

Even now as he was on a mission, he knew the cold stares of the men bleeding out on the floor would be burned into his memory. Quite literally, as that room with all his victims had proved that more than anything. With a sigh, he put away his crescent blades, ready to go back home and let Steven front so he wouldn't have to ruminate on the fact.

Marc, did you hear that?

He paused, letting the hood and mask of his outfit fall away so that he could listen carefully.

Haggard breaths and stifled weeping.

Where on earth could that be coming from?

He followed the sound to the back of the van, unease already forming at the implications. Making sure the back was unlocked first, he went to open it which confirmed his suspicions.

The first thing he noticed were the bruises littered about your skin, and with the blindfold and restraints, you failed to recognize him beyond your captors as you went silent and near still save for your trembling. The sight did wonders to ease his guilt at least.

Bloody hell.. these were some awful people, Marc.

He grimaced in agreement, but as he’s about to call out to you, he hesitates. Steven might be better for this, he thinks. In the metal of the vehicle, he sees Steven shake his head.

Go on mate, the longer you take, the more she’ll fret now.

He sighs, “Hey.” You flinch, and he winces at the gruffness of his voice, so he tries again, gentler this time.

“I took care of the guys who hurt you. I’m gonna let you go now, okay?” Your breathing is still shallow, which concerns him, but he cuts away at your binds the moment you give him the go ahead.

His touch is light and way too gentle to be any way reminiscent of those who kidnapped you. You can’t help but laugh shakily, just relieved that it’s all over. He pauses at your reaction, and you can tell he’s confused.

“Sorry, I’m just- I’m so glad they’re finally gone now.” Your voice is hoarser than you expected, making you cringe. But you can’t bring yourself to focus on that when you find your wounds aren’t aching anymore. At last he takes off your blindfolds, it takes you a moment to adjust your eyes and you see him.

His brows are furrowed with careful concentration along with focused, piercing eyes that would’ve frightened you had you not know he was your savior. But with how intense his gaze was, he almost looked constipated. You stifle a laugh, which gains you more confusion from the man.

“S-Sorry! Sorry, it’s just that, you look so serious. Do I look that bad?” His expression relaxes a bit, and he lets out a soft huff. Yet when he glances at your bruises, he finds that they aren't as exacerbated as they were before. He wears that silly, serious expression again and you’re tempted to smooth out the wrinkle that forms in his brows.

Unfortunately, the impulse was immediately acted upon considering your lack of inhibitions from the whole ordeal. But you accomplish your goal when instead, his eyes widen and his expression relaxes under your hand.

He doesn’t get it. He doesn’t understand the fact that with a single brush of your fingertips against his face, he finds fullness in the silence, reprieve with every breath he takes, peace in the moment. He watches you move your hand away when you find yourself, and though you appear embarrassed, he finds himself more so when he realizes how much he misses the contact already.

“Sorry,” you utter again, “I wasn’t thinking and-” he grabs your hand again with urgency at first. Yet he remembers your condition, and his grasp becomes gentle. The action shocks the two of you, and while Marc is mortified he did that without thinking, he manages to recover from it quickly.

“You gotta stop apologizing, you know.” Enraptured, you find yourself just nodding along. But again you realize the utter lack of pain you should be feeling. Another glance, and you notice, your bruises are gone.

“Who are you?” You almost start to think this is some sort of dream. But the weight and warmth of his hand, even the details of the callouses upon his fingertips is just too real to ignore.

“Marc. Spector.” He clears his throat, “Marc Spector.” He says altogether. A smile forms on your face as you tell him your name in return.

“Marc..”

Steven, I’m not gonna hear it.

“But Marc-”

No, I already told you that this was how it’s gonna go.

They both knew you were something special. After Marc made sure you got home safely that night, the two of you shared contact information because there was a mutual understanding that there was something about the other neither of you could ignore.

But no matter how much Marc longed to see you again, he was afraid of what you could mean to them. He was resigned to denying himself this chance, so already it took a lot of convincing from Steven to allow even the alter to meet you.

“Alright, but you’re being a bit of a knob, you know that right?” He watched his reflection roll his eyes, so he frowned right on back as he adjusted the collar of his shirt. “I just don’t understand why you do this to yourself. It’s not like you’re the only one interested, not to mention, they seemed rather fancied too.” He mutters, trying to fix the stray curl that always managed to find its way back onto his forehead.

He didn’t miss the hesitation Marc had at that statement, but both parties were distracted by the knocking at the door.

To be honest, Steven was also quite taken to you after seeing you last. And opening the door to you dressed comfortably and looking at ease in your own skin already has him feeling something more. When you light up at the sight of him, he swears his heart flutters like nothing else before.

“Steven, right?” The sound of his name from your lips easily brings a smile to his face, and you can easily feel the difference between the two of them.

“Yes! Come on in, love. Apologies for such a late notice, I hope it didn’t trouble you much.” Though the endearment causes you to blush, you shake your head as you enter.

“No, not at all. I thought it as a good opportunity to meet you also.” You say as if it’s the most natural thing to do, getting acquainted with the other person of the same body. You were so understanding over the phone when he, or rather, Marc, broke the news to you about his disorder. Rather than respond with apprehension or even any sort of displeasure at the revelation, you were curious, excited even to get to know Steven as much as Marc. The thought comforts him really, and he can’t help but get his hopes up.

“Well, I’m quite fond of getting to know you too.” He pauses, before giving a cheeky little grin. “You know, Marc has spoken quite well of you since then.”

Steven…

But the man is pleased the mere statement has you flustered and tugging at your sleeves in a nervous habit. “Really? I wasn’t sure I made much of an impression.”

Even if he had met you on the street, he’s sure he wouldn’t have forgotten you. He has a feeling Marc shares the same sentiment.

“It’s not often someone can be as lighthearted after what you’ve been through. I only wish we could’ve met you in better circumstances.” He tuts, shaking his head, “But let’s not focus on that, I had a whole bit planned for us today if you’re up for it.” The thoughtfulness pulls a smile onto your face.

“I’d love to.”

. .

Steven was softer spoken, but that didn’t mean he didn’t talk any less. Honestly, you didn’t mind, considering how excited he’d get about his topics of interest. That paired alongside his cute, little accent basically had you hanging on his every word. It also helped that he took you to the museum, his discounted tickets made it all the more ideal to go to.

And he was such a darling about it too, always checking in on you to make sure you were enjoying yourself and overly fretting that maybe he was talking your ear off since he has a habit of speaking too much before he realizes it. You quickly shut down the thought by responding you were glad to have your very own, personal tour guide. To add on top of your statement, you made sure to ask a few extra questions just to encourage him to talk.

Marc was quiet throughout the whole endeavor. After everything that happened in Egypt, he knew it’d be difficult to fall back into their normal routine again. Yet watching Steven talk to you so carefree and at ease, he couldn’t help but be relieved for a moment. But nonetheless, this was more of a date than he’d like it to be. He only acquiesced because he warned Steven to keep the distance, but right off the bat the man did and said what he wished. Damn Steven for getting so confident after everything, no matter how much it made him proud. Even so, he didn’t force his way to fronting either because he didn’t know if he had the courage to deny you. So he was left to watch, more jealous than he’d ever admit.

“You mind if I ask a weird question?"” He blinked, not expecting it but quickly nodded to not allow you to shy away.

“I don’t mind at all, it’s just been me speaking this whole lot anyways.” He gives a quick laugh. “What is it, love?”

“How exactly do you talk to Marc? I mean, you are sharing the same body and everything.” That surprised him, and he glanced at the reflective plaque as if expecting Marc to respond. The man only shrugged, pretending not to care. “Sorry, was that too much of me?” He shook his head immediately.

“Of course not, you could never be.” He blurted, becoming embarrassed. “Er, what I mean is that it’s a perfectly reasonable question.” He scratched the back of his head, “It’s a little strange to admit, but he’s sorta my reflection.” He watches you look around to try finding the nearest reflective surface and he can’t help but laugh at how cute that is.

“Hey.” You mock frown, but you’re secretly pleased to see the twinkle of delight in his eyes as he looks at you. You wouldn’t mind if he looked at you like that everyday. “Can you see him now?”

Don’t tell her, Steven.

He nods, although curious, “Why do you ask?”

“I have something I want to tell him.” You reply without hesitation, still trying to keep an eye out for anywhere with reflections. You do notice a particularly shiny pillar, but you think it’s rather far to hold a conversation with. But then that makes you wonder, do they have to talk aloud to communicate? “I mean, that is, if he can hear me.”

“Yeah he can. You know he’s been off and grumpy in this plaque here for quite a while now. Think the lad’s jealous is what it is.” He taps on the piece of metal to further point it out.

Steven! What the hell do you think you’re doing? I told you that you weren’t supposed to mention me at-

“Hey Marc?” You’re looking straight at the plaque, and for a moment, Marc swears you can actually see him then and there. “Thank you. I don’t think I ever got the chance to tell you that night, but I’m really glad I got to meet you and Steven.” And then you smile, and though it should be impossible since he’s not fronting, the sight takes his breath away.

When you turn back to Steven, you see the fondest expression on his face that makes your face warm. He’s amazed by you is why he’s having such a goofy smile— the kind that stretches his lips and forms a little wrinkle on the edges of his cheeks. He remembers how you didn’t even question it when he told you Marc wasn’t going to see you today, only understanding that the man had his reasons.

Tell her I just did my job that night.

His eyes widen and he looks at the reflection. You looked curious, “Did he say something?” Even Marc is looking back at him with surprise as well.

I.. forget I said anything.

“Yes, actually.” He sees Marc’s lips downturn to a frown. “He’s glad to have met you as well. I am the same.” Your blush starts to become quite visible, pleasing him as it seems to cause Marc to be at a loss for words.

A sudden growl stuns the both of you, and he gets all bashful then. “Ah, that ruined the moment didn’t it? What a shame.” He laughs, lightly patting his stomach. “It seems I’m a bit peckish now, hm? Are you alright in finding some takeaway and ending the date at my flat?” He blinks when you look at him with a stunned look on your face. “S-Sorry! That was too forward of me wasn’t it?” Taking a deep breath, you feel emboldened to act up as well.

Reaching out, you carefully take his hand into yours, and give him a cheeky little grin. “Only if you’re alright with me doing the same.” Both his eyes and mouth are wide with shock, and he flounders for words which brings you to laugh. “Ah! I don’t mean to laugh, you just look so cute right now.”

It feels as if time slows down then. This man who you’ve barely known for a day and some already makes you feel such affection for him. With the way he looks at you, he makes it perfectly clear that he feels the same way. The deep browns of his eyes have you mesmerized, and you catch him glancing down to your lips for a split second. He slowly starts leaning in, and you’re just about to reach up to cup his face when something in his gaze flickers and he pauses.

“Let’s go get dinner then.” That American accent.

Marc ends up leading you out of the museum, but you make sure to take note that while he did pull back, he never did let go of your hand on the way out.

. . .

He didn’t say much after getting the food or even getting settled down in the flat. He did reply to any inquiries you made with soft noises of acknowledgement, but hardly went beyond a ‘yes’. It astonished you truly how different the two men were. As you watched him walk about his kitchen, the way he carried himself was more confident, with straighter posture while he shuffled about silently. You helped him set up the food, and he didn’t even question it beyond a curious glance as he handed you utensils and napkins. The whole scene felt too domestic, and you could barely hold back a smile at the thought.

“I had fun today.” He grunts with a nod. When he had first done so, you had taken it a little apprehensively, especially due to the sudden contrast from Steven. But with the crinkle in his brow that formed from concern, you knew that wasn’t his intention. You figured that he didn’t know how to respond, yet didn’t want to make you think he wasn’t listening. It was his way of showing he was indeed hearing you, and you found that sweet. You slowly open your box, blowing at the steam that puffed out. “I’m glad that I also get the chance to spend some time with you too.” You added on quietly as an afterthought.

He froze which was made pointedly clear as he fumbled with his own box that tapped against the table. Nervous, you realized. That’s why he was so quiet. He slowly nodded, and not to embarrass him further with the silence, you thanked him for the food and quickly dug in.

Which was a mistake because it was piping hot.

The table jolted as you flinched. Your tongue burned, and you barely were able to swallow down the bite much to your discomfort. Marc shot up in alarm, and made his way next to you in a couple of strides, and his hands rose to hover over you worriedly.

“Are you okay? What happened?” His voice was low, but it hardly hid how concerned he was. His eyes were scanning the food carefully as if it were an active threat, and you waved your hand to hopefully ward off his fears.

“H-Hot.” You scrunch your face at the pain that rushes through your mouth from speaking. He kneels to get closer to you, a hand reaching up to your face to cradle it and assess the damage. When you open your eyes, he’s barely inches away.

The crease in his brow was deepened, pressing down and shadowing his eyes and he was too preoccupied to notice the proximity. With his hand so close, you could feel the heat of him radiate off of it. You felt just as mesmerized when you first met him, and you couldn’t help but lean into his touch. It was only then that he noticed the position and felt his breath stutter.

But your own brows furrowed when you realized your tongue didn’t hurt at all. You gasped, immediately reactivating his protective mode, but you reached up to rest your hand on top of his. “It doesn’t hurt anymore.” He blinks. “My tongue.” Further confusion and you laughed. “Sorry- er, I mean- Well, it’s not just that. I forgot to mention also that night, you made my bruises go away too.” There’s a spark of recognition and he nods. “How’d you do that?”

“I don’t know.” His gaze glances to where your bruises were, his gaze darkening from the memory. “It’s not something I can do.” Yet when you lightly brush your thumb over his knuckles, the tension is relieved from his face and he feels himself go still under your touch. “You affect me somehow too.” He says before he can think which makes him cringe. “I didn’t mean it like-” he sighs, “I don’t know how to explain it.”

“As if I could trust you with my whole life despite barely knowing you.” He stares at you, a little too long that makes you think you’ve said something wrong for a moment until he leans in closer.

“I didn’t mean to front today.” He pauses, looking away as he tries to find his words. “To be honest, I wanted to avoid you, but after seeing you talk with Steven, I..” he trails off, sighing as his eyes eventually find their way back to yours.

For a moment he looks small. Eyes filled with uncertainty, but even so, you manage to see a glimmer of hope. His voice gets somehow quieter as he barely murmurs, “Can I?” And you know he’s referring back to your statement. Your hand falls from his, causing his heart to start sinking. But then you lean in, touching your forehead against his as your hand ends up resting on his shoulder.

“I would trust you.” Your breath fans over his lips from the proximity, and his eyelids flutter to lay half-lidded.

Since he left the museum, Steven had been talking at him almost nonstop from the takeout to the flat, even as he got ready to eat with you. He wasn’t responding as he should, he wasn’t honest with himself, he stole you away from your lovely time with Steven. And Marc knew that, but you didn’t make a single complaint. You smiled at him. And every sweet word that fell from your lips, he knew in his heart you meant it. You were happy to be with him just as much as Steven.

The alter in question went completely silent as his lips made contact with yours. And while envious to some extent, he was also relieved. Marc had finally allowed himself some good; he had found his peace with you.

masterlist

#shnargo writes #bweep #steven grant x reader #marc spector x reader #steven grant/reader #marc spector/reader #mcu reader insert #steven grant fanfic #marc spector fanfic #moon knight x reader #tw kidnapping

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