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#jeon jungkook x reader
l0mljeonjungkook · a day ago
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Reward (JJK X Reader)
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Summary - Loving Jungkook secretly is what you have been doing for years. Your best friend never left your side, and neither did you. You received the e-mail, you two were waiting for. Granted, you don't wanna leave his side, not now, not ever. So, concluding to give this heart-clenching news to Jungkook, you're here standing right outside his glass window, however, what's in front of your eyes isn't what you expected from him, not today at least.
Guess what worst could happen? When he finds you, drooling behind the glass window? Wrong timings, poor you. You were here to surprise him, except the reward he offers you isn't in the way you desired it to be, however, you can't deny it.
Warnings - explicit sexual content, dom!jk, hair pulling, choking, fingering, spanking, breast play, dirty talk, rough sex, without protection, aftercare, praise, clit spank (a lot of spanking actually) (I'm sorry)
Genre - best friends to lovers
Pairing - Jungkook / reader
Rating - 18+ NSFW ( MINORS DNI 🔞)
Word count - 10k+
Masterlist || Wattpad || ao3
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You're so heartwarmingly cheery to fill his not only ears with the news but lips with a bright beam that only lightens your day and soul, but the same news shrinks your heart at the same time, why??
Going to University, sure that's what you dreamt of for so long before your heart agreed that the affection you feel for your best friend is not just some care or friendship but - love, but forthwith your dream which you fed with your love, your sweat, your tears, your hard work, and your time is in your hand right now, on your mail.
You certainly want to share it with him, but you aren't sure about it, whether you should or not, surely he'll be the happiest and maybe more than you, and thats what shakes your soul, questioning you.
Are you really prepared for going to the new place where you won't even get a sight of him the way you get right now?
Every day?
The answer is a million times - No!
Are you ready for that? Certainly not!
Will you survive? Not even a heartbeat!
In your heart, you two are together in there living happily ever after with your best friend, who's living next to your apartment, except that there's a wall between your apartments. A bridge of stones between two souls, a dam between two hearts overflowing with love for one another, two friends who are wildly in love with each other yet oblivious.
You two are like one body and two souls, never alone. People know if they saw one of you at parties there's no shadow of a doubt that the second ain't there. Jealous filthy whores, burn on smolder of their burning hearts with envy, on seeing you with the sexiest yet kindest guy at your university, and you ain't less than a fucking bitch, clinging to Jungkook's arms around them made your blood tainted with serene reach to all the ends of your body.
You two, unhesitatingly and tirelessly stood by each other - through every thick and thin, shared every emotion, every little secret which was meant to be buried was ever buried between you two, defending each other not merely in front of douchebags but also, in front of your teachers, and parents too if all else fails.
This is what you treasured since kindergarten, you two had an unbreakable bond. Then why won't anyone be jealous of you two?
But this guy had an issue with you whenever you were in a relationship with someone, Jungkook never let you breathe in peace.
"You've changed",
"you're my best friend first then his girlfriend",
"I have all rights reserved on you, you were, are, and forever will be mine",
But your favorite to date - those words that still pool the heartwarming rush of warmth between your legs "leave him, we both are enough for one another" and whatnot.
Save for the fact, this guy won't let you stay here after knowing what this really means to you, but he doesn't know this about your mind, you left that dream, the day your drunk neighbor - your best friend confessed what your heart's been alarming you.
That - "I love you, since the day you came in my life y/n when we were friends, then you followed me", he took a sip of wine from his cup, " all the way from Busan to Seattle," he chuckles, "with-- your bags in one hand and the keys in another to the apartment next to mine, since then my-- my life--".
This is what he whisperingly confessed in your ear and all the drunkenness you wooed from boozing six cups of wine all that headed to the hills at those three words. Hereafter, your soul screams at those unsatisfactorily unfinished words and now you curse your bestie Yoongi every fucking night for bringing another cup of alcohol that led him to eat those words back again. You don't get it why is Jungkook has been treasuring those words? My life - what my life, you want to know what all he has in his heart. Those three words, I love you - seeped into your soul, have been living there with your love for him, since then.
But the heart-shattering truth - that asshole doesn't remember at all.
That sometimes soothes you but 99.999% time heats your soul, your skin, and your body to the nuclear level.
Jungkook, still waiting for the news of you being accepted to the University with receiving a full-tuition scholarship, was only making him quiz you every fucking day. This was not solely yours but now his dream too as if he wants you out of his sight or mayhaps... mayhaps is waiting for what you have been waiting and it's better to put an end to those questions.
And the reason why you decide to jump from your balcony to his is that's what you two always do. At any time of the day, whether day or night, though you don't intend to interfere in either's privacy you two haven't learned anything than being the irksome element in either's life. Not banging the doors to meet the other, you two jump from your balcony to the other and bang the windows of either room.
Whenever you peep inside through the window, you either find him eating or playing fucktons of games on his mobile. Presently, you were going to hammer the window to make him know who's here, but, today, it's different, you retreive your hand back as your mouth forms an O, and by different, this is not what you expected him to do.
A fever of epiphany laced with ardor cruised through your skin vibrating all your senses to the core as your eyes couldn't believe what they are beholding, they yearned to see for so long.
Jungkook lying on the bed, his eye shut, his breaths rushing at high speed, his teeth grinding, as you absorb the dark shadow of his jaw and the defined curves of his cheeks. Groans vibrate in his chest as moans claws out of his lips, the way you want to consume them inside you.
His bare chest makes you drool every time you eye him to no length, heaving breathlessly, and his hand... His hand is what your eyes are hungrily fixed at.
His - hand - on - his - groin, actively on a job you dream to do for him every day but beyond that, it's for you. "Oh, boy let me do that for you", you murmur under your hitched breath, choking on your spit.
And seeing him like that, only so much makes you imagine yourself getting wall-banged by your best friend. That look on his face is making you touch yourself as the heat between your legs is pooling your heartbeats that are floating, there's always a but and it is at present too, you're probably standing outside of his bedroom you have two choices either bang his door and ride it.
Or,
Turn around, and follow the path that leads you here, make your way to your room and do what you have been doing for years since you learned about your feelings for him.
Yes . Go . Back . And . Toss . Yourself . Off. Is what going on in your head!!!
Your hand ached to be where his hand was, touch it, put it in your mouth and suck it --- "JESUS, enough", you hiss, was that loud? Retrieving your hand which was between your thighs a second ago "I need to learn, whatever this is, it's from my side, probably he doesn't see me more than his friend."
You're not around him, but you can feel his proximity like an electric hum. Just seeing him masturbating, flares a firestorm inside you heating your reproductive organs, making them hungry for him touch, for his mouth.
Oh, that mouth, you saw gasping minutes ago, the same mouth that laughs with you, kisses you sometimes but makes you want to kiss them every time you're with him, his head dropped back and those unholy lips roar your name like no other person ever could, laced with honey syrup, but not right now, presently, not lacing your name with honey but the darkness in his voice, hearing your name from those lips sends a shiver through you. The potency of your name on his lips, his heavy breaths, and his moans rile you up, sending waves of heat down to your core. You feel the dampness between your legs.
Jungkook jacking off his meat, eyes shut, and his lips summoning your name in a countless filthily unholy way. . . decimating the pictures of his innocence from your mind and voices of him calling you awfully sweetly.
But what you just saw cools down the fire to zero and can't be misunderstood because that was the last thing you wanted to happen amongst every other stuff.
"Oh, fuck, did he just see me", taking a step back, you murmur, because face this, your JESUS, enough actually slipped through this glass window across the room to his ears. You wonder why didn't he react, waiting for an honest answer to that question, looking back at him you find him zipping up with one hand, and picking up his phone with another.
Your phone rings in your hand, and you glance at it, dread seeping through your wide alarmed eyes. You look at him, then your eyes fall back on your ringing phone and back at him again.
He's eyeing you, does this call means he knows I saw him jerking off? Holy shit. That heart-stopping grin on his face, tells you nothing more than a yes in return for what you asked.
You meet your eyes on the glass, reflecting the enormous expression of shock in them. The only glass creating a distance between you two, the only thing that kept him from your filthy drooling mouth minutes ago or might change those words to - the only glass that let you watch him like that.
You blink your eyes twice looking directly into his seductively dark eyes through a glass window, that unfamiliar darkness in those brown eyes, his furrowed brows, is alien to you, as you're friendly enough with his puppy eyes. The ringing phone in your hand channels you back. He's still watching your every moment biting his pierced lips, and motioning you over with his fore and middle fingers. God, I want them deep inside me. Shut the fuck up.
You open the door and force your shivering feet into his room, "hey", strengthening your usual way of meeting him like you both usually do, with a bang on his door, letting him know about the storm you are, is at his place to suck away his peace for the rest of the day. But you hate the quiver in your voice.
Today you're every other synonym of dumb, every other name for vulnerable, and every coy term for being terrified as you notice your shaky voice, yet you kept walking towards him, your damp thighs rubbing together transporting you right behind the glass window and your lustful eyes are to be blamed for what is going to happen next, you do want this but never like this, you didn't wish - for this - like this, never.
His eyes track your path to him watching your exposed thighs as you're wearing nothing but his shirt which you took without his permission, last week to be precise, "Ugh, I -- I--", you wave your hand holding the phone, unintentionally showing off the mail, displayed on your phone's screen, gripping it hard to dear life, this is the only moment to let him know why you were here in the first place, "this uh Jungkookie I got--".
"Call me, Jungkook", his voice is rough, as he stands in front of you, holding your unblinking gaze, but that seductiveness you saw earlier is picking up the pace.
Oh shit, is he angry. You don't want this. Speak up you bitch, spill spill spill, god dammit. Sweat trickles down your spine, and you can feel it running down the lane.
Is this his heat-raising gooseflesh on my skin, or his eyes that are poking holes into my soul, or his deep throaty voice to call him Jungkook? But why, he's your friend, it's up to you whatever you please to, you can.
"Jungkook, I can explain, I'm sorry I didn't mean to--"
He saw your phone and probably understood the reason why you were here in the first place, raising his hand between you both motioning you to place your phone in his hand.
I won't, moreover, I don't have to do this, he's probably going nuts, let him be. I'll do what pleases me.
You rather like this Jungkook, pissing him off is now your favorite thing to do every day. You cross your arms around your chest keeping your phone from his sight, you certainly dropped your brain at his doorstep before entering.
"I won't repeat." His voice is above par right now, "Your phone. Right now. On my hands."
"But you'll have to listen to me first Kook, don't assume fucking shit when you actually dont know the real--"
He motions himself closer to you, just an inch away, he leans his face close to your ears, "I said call me Jungkook, and assume? Really Y/N, you wanna know about my assumptions about what I saw, or let's talk about your sight?"
Closing the distance between you two, he moves closer to you, leans and his breathy words melt away all valor from your body turning it into sweat dripping from your forehead, gliding down to your cheeks. He rubs it away with a demonic grin on his pierced lips, "don't get nervous, and don't make me make you go all wet, from head to all the way down your spine, to your pretty toes, princess", he looks deep into your eyes, then his gaze falls on your lips, he grazes your lower lips with his thumb, "now, give your phone."
Without wasting another second you do what he expects. You hold your breath and avert your eyes, "I got selected Jungkookie I--", your voice shivers and you press your eyes shut, just to open them, "I mean Jungkook--"
"I know, and when did you get this?", lifting his eyes from your phone in his hand to your face, his face glowing in the heat of lust you haven't seen earlier - bedroom eyes, drowning in hunger and sin. This is the look I saw when he was in the throes of orgasms -- jerking off, luscious and wild.
"Can't recall", you try to calm your voice, "probably an hour or a few maybe", noticing a wicked glint liting his eyes makes your blood heat and your cheeks daubed in the pink flush and warmth oozing through his body.
Closing the distance between you two, he slowly ominously directed his footsteps towards you. Setting one foot before the other on the move. You abstractedly backpedal, whilst he didn't break the pace, he pursued you.
Touching the ground of your friendship, chasing you - whenever you get angry or trying to invest more of your time in your stupid exes. Since day one, he never let you stay off.
He possesses the power over you, habitually, the language of his eyes is only known to your eyes, he doesn't need to drop the words out of his luscious lips, your eyes are better at unriddling those unavowed words. The main cause of jealousy growing roots and venomous flowers into the sour heart of all the girls out there who are crushing on your best friend, your love, is seeing - the intimacy between your eyes, between you and Jungkook.
You kept backtracking, and he never ceased to advance, his features stern and somber, a heart-halting grin on his pierced lips and his tendons hiding his dark eyes hindering your sight, to eye those sinful gazes.
You swear to god, you saw an emotion you have never seen in his pristine and flawless features, ardor in his lustful gaze.
Bang, your back hit the door to the cage you break into, you gasp, and your hands obliviously uprise in defense. He seizes them and pins them right atop your head.
In an eyeblink, he spins you away. You wiggle with your back to him and your sweaty palms with the heat between you two are flat on the wooden door, "Jungkookie--", you only manage to utter his name before he shushes you.
You feel his chest vibrating against your back breathing roughly heatedly, his lips meet your right ear as a shiver runs down to the south. He blows out a breath lashing at your neck. When he speaks in his deep husky voice, "I said call me Jungkook. You lost dominance of calling me Jungkookie from", his free hand travels from the south of your body to the north - your lips, by tracing them with his thumb, "these precious little lips", you feel his rich baritone vibrating in his chest sipping out and ingress into yours through the seam tangling your body with his.
"I. . . I'm sorry Jungkook, listen to me on--"
He hushes you again, as he leans his face deep, "it's not the correct time to call me Jungkook, either", he commands in his gruffly sexy voice making you lock your legs to keep them from wobbling, "call me what pleases me."
"I. . . don't know, your girlfriend might be familiar with what pleases you, call her to fill yourself with all your needs, Jungkook."
His free hand swims back to your thighs gathering the hem of his plaid shirt around your thighs in his fist, heaving it up just above the waistband of your black thongs, bunching around your waist. "I know, but what if I'm bored with her, her presence, what if I want," he grabs your ass and pinches it, "this, right now", he rubs his lips against your ears, "what if I want every word from your lips."
His hands travel back between your plump thighs caressing your cotton-like skin, his gentle nuzzles are barely a caress, unleashing the beast you locked in you.
Drawing circles between your now damp thighs. Each seam of contact between your skin is nothing more than a hot melting wax on your skin, with just a mere touch it just not burns but bruises, a bruise you want to savor every second of your day, you want to earn from only him.
An unendurable yet satiating pressure pinching inside you, simmering, tingling, intimidating to burst. As you clench your thighs together, wriggling with urgency,"Kook, I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt y--"
"You should have thought this before covering this body with my shirt", he leans, as he whispers, "before watching me jerking off", he presses his body against your back, meaning to remind you of your deeds, "stop calling me that, I warn you for the last time", he grabs your ass, "I'm throwing off two options in front of you", he presses his body hard this time, harder for you to ignore, "either daddy or sir, whichever works for you." Words puff out of his mouth laced with a warmish breath that ruffles your hair brushing against your skin.
Your eyes widen at the mere word daddy because you love to call him daddy when you touch yourself. The word sends waves of heat across your ass.
His fingers curl around your waist, touching your skin like it's sacred for him to touch, hooking into the waistband of your thongs but this time you give him what you craved for so long as you yank your butt tight against his thick erection. Your body instantly reacts to his body even though his starched pants failed to separate you two. Heating, pulsing, thumping desperately waiting to explode. You arch your spine, pressing your hips against his cock.
His left hand on your wrist atop your head snakes down your arms, unhurriedly, rising chill bumps to wherever he touches as he grabs your hips. Your flat palm on the door, warm and sweaty, you tightly close your fist, fingernails biting into your palms. You yank open, as your fingernails burry into the wooden door making a shrieking sound.
His mouth goes back to your ear, tracing it with his tongue, sailing down to your neck, teasing and kissing sensitive skin, rousing you with the rush of his heated breath, "told you millions of times before, this is probably the last, feed this in your head - there's nothing between me and Hana."
Tilting your head for him to earn his kisses on every inch of your neck, "your room smells like her", your eyes shut, as you murmur, unable to conceal the ache in your voice, "Probably she'd be on her way."
"She's getting engaged to Minjun next month, don't bring her name right now," he continues kissing and licking your sensitive skin below your lobe, his groans filling his room.
"Mhm"
"So what did you decide," he whispers and the next thing makes you moan as he bites your lobe.
"Kook... Fuck." You breathe heavily as he presses a kiss on the blade of your shoulder, "did you... Did you just say something?"
"Daddy or sir?" His warm breaths tingle your skin.
"Da-- daddy"
"Good girl", his commanding voice vibrates the air around you two.
"Koo--, Dadd--", you submissively shut your eyes biting your lips, he hums resting his chin on your shoulder, briefing you to continue, "Daddy, I-- I'm nervous", you whisper.
"Oh," he bites onto your shoulder blade, "you should be, princess", he kisses you.
Standing right behind you, body-to-body, his chest to your back, his hard dick pressing against your ass and you wish nothing more but to feel - skin-to-skin for his shirt is the only barrier separating you two. He unbuttons his shirt on your skin, motioning from south to north, from the last button around your waist, then the second last, in an unrushed motion. "Y/N", he whispers into your ear.
And you hum, eyes still shut, you don't want this to fade away it looks like nothing but a dream to you.
"Do you wanna know what am gonna do with you", barely the first three buttons left for him to unbutton.
"Ye-- Yes", you choke on your breath.
He halts his motion of unfastening the buttons, sliding his veiny tattoed hand inside your shirt with a thought to unhook your bra, but your bare breast makes him flinch, very unexpectedly.
"I'm gonna tear your pussy in half," his voice raging with heat, lust, and sin.
You groan, trying to hide it you hold your breaths.
"Breathe, princess. Breathe", he whispers into your ear and you do as he says, you take a deep audible breath that makes him rub his dick against your ass.
The next thing is unexplainable, you didn't expect him to do this... Just minutes ago you felt he was doing nothing but playing with you, his usual touching, kissing you on every exposed part that's in front of him, but this... His huge veiny tattoed hand sank into your thongs, Jesus Christ his cold fingers... Fuck his cold fingers slide over your warm clit pressing into your folds, "yesss", you moan shutting your eyes. Your fingers curl harder, messing up for you to stand on your toes.
Coating his cold fingers with your warm wetness as he pulls out his hand, "fucking wet, because of me jerking off?", moving it beneath your shirt, he grabs your soft nipples, between his fore and mid-finger concealing your bud with the wetness he just daubed his fingers into, "Jungkook, fuckkk."
His other hand grabs your throat, yanking your head back to his shoulder, "say daddy". All the while his mouth continues nipping your skin, biting below your lobe, and licking the bruises to calm the delicately sensitive spot beneath your ear.
"Daddy", an unholy grin on your lips, as if calling him daddy satiates you above par.
He's jarring his unseen dark side to your senses, briefing you with all the dark concealed secrets of him, stored in a box and locked, kept deep inside his soul.
"Do you wanna know why?"
"Yes",
He presses his hard groin against your ass, "say, yes daddy," he hisses.
"Ye-- Yes, Daddy", you mirror his words submissively, very unlawful of you.
"You did a great job princess, got selected, and made me proud, so you need to be rewarded and your desires to be satiated. So this is your reward, princess. A reward, I was hungrily waiting to leave on your body, mark on your skin, bury inside your soul and bruise your skin for you to relive every time you feel them on your skin."
"But Jungkook, I don't want to leave this place, leave you here", you are awfully sad about the fact that you won't get a sight of him, after leaving this place, but right now the unworldly lust, thirst, and hunger for him has taken you over from all the other-worldly reasons of you not being with him, only making you focus what you're getting right at this moment.
He hushes you, "be with me right here, right now, I'm not leaving you anytime soon, Princess." He kisses your shoulder, his words akin to your heart, and this time you not only feel the care in his words but a promise, an unbreakable promise.
He flattens your spine against him, his hand leaving your swollen nipple and sinking his hand under your thong slowly teasing you, working his veiny hands and expert fingers on your pretty little swollen pussy, you soak up your damn thongs, as he plays with your slit and teases your opening.
"soaking up your panties, princess", he groans against your hair.
The palm on your throat now feels warm on your skin, keeping your head tucked against his shoulder.
Playing with your dousing clit, you squirm abstractedly as you're bumbling to stand on your toes, his body and the door are the foremost help for your body. Noticing your struggle, he makes it arduous for you to lean onto him as he pushes two stiff yet cold fingers inside you.
Jesus, Your heart halts, vision blurs, knees gave out, and your lungs - cave in.
You have never felt more alive. You wonder if this is a really real heaven.
He's invading you, assaulting you, crashing into you with his heat, stroking you with his touch, his digits sinking through flesh and his thirst consuming your whole being.
The next what he does makes your senses active as he shoves your thongs to your thighs as soon as the cool air around you two hits your warm pussy drenched with all the wetness, he fingers you making you whimper, flooding his pink neon-lit room with your moans and heavy breaths. You ache to look into his beautiful eyes, and you see nothing but the wooden door in front of your lewd eyes, "Jungkook, please", you moan for release this time.
But your please halts his every motion, his breath as you feel his heavy chest paused at your mere please as if waiting to release it, and you know, you know if weakness had another name it would be, please for him at least. Not just right now, but whenever you want something from this guy you just need to utter please as whisperingly as you can.
Then he uncovers your barely covered body heeding to your please, shivers, quivers, shakes, trembles, flutters, you felt everything every fucking thing you ever read in books that made you feel all of the same, right now, Jungkook your best friend gave you every shiver, every quiver, every shock, every flutter by just uncovering your body, a yes sounded more like a moan, escapes through your lips giving him all the thumbs up he wanted right now from you.
He sank his hand back between your legs, teasing you, provoking you for you don't know what. Collecting every drop around his fingers as if he isn't in the mood to waste a dripping drop.
Quivering and naked, in front of your best friend - Jungkook!!! You always had your kind side, helpful heart, and been a friend you never have been to someone else - for him, you never reckoned this, but to be honest, you sure yearned for his touch however, this will come so soon to you is in itself a huge shock.
Throbbing heart or pussy or call it your heart is in your pussy right now, thumping dangerously. You grip the doorknob, staring out of the glass window, allowing the street light to pass through it as the light fills up and mixes with pink neon in his room beside the door. The room in neon sounds wild and looks romantic.
"Fuck, Is this real?" You moan, rocking your hips, riding the thurst of his now warm fingers inside you.
"Looks like a dream to me," he presses his body to let you know everything between you two is for real, "don't wanna wake up from this beautiful dream", he whispers into your ear, "do you?"
"Never, but the most beautiful thing is, this isn't a dream kook," you press hard on the doorknob mirroring his motions inside your pussy. His breaths are heady and savory and spicy to your skin as they burn your skin wherever they touch.
He surrounds you. Arms, hands, lips, and his masculine need, his every touch channels your every sense warning you about him everywhere all at once. Your body reacting to him as though you're made for his touch, for him, for Jungkook, your childhood best friend.
Everything he is doing, every kiss, every caress, is a long exhausting ride in the game of torturing, teasing, and seduction. Meanwhilst, you're craving for him to throw you onto his bed that smells of her, you between his fluffy bed and his warm body, and fuck you in every fucking position right away.
You try to hurry him along, but he ain't allowing it. He pins your hands when you touch his hard dick. Instantly smacking your ass as you ground against him. You want to kiss his lips which are right beside your ears, but he isn't going to give them to you, yet. Man won't let you turn around.
Making you filthy little whore for him, desperate to surrender to his will. So standing still, with holding onto the doorknob with dear life, your feet spread apart, and spine arching back at his pull, licking you, kissing you and torturing every inch square of your naked body.
Dropping your head back on his chest, the support of his arms around your body. He cups and knead your breasts and your breath turns heavier with his every kneading, you always wanted him to touch you perhaps this is awfully better than your visions. He pinches your nipples, outlines your breastbone, and strokes the curve of your neck, "they fit perfectly in mine", his hands fuck yes they are! He says seductively into your skin as you feel his words sinking into your skin.
His steely jaw bruises your temples, while he's resting his fingers on your throat and outlining your lips with his thumb. Your head lay back on him, neck stretching back and exposing the valley between your delicate breast as your mouth opens adjusting heavy breaths.
Whatever he is doing, you're basking at this moment, and whatever he wants to do to you you're happily inviting him. He's gliding his feather-light fingers across your cheeks, into your hairline, and around your throat, and back into your hairline he pauses "tell me how much you want this".
"As much as you,"
He yanks you back with his tight grip on your head, "what did you just say?"
"As much as you," you grin knowing what he wants to listen to however, pisssing him off is your game right now.
"You want daddy to play this game hard on you, no?"
"Da-- daddy", you choke on your spit this time, "as much as you want, Daddy", tears escaping from the corner of your eyes.
"Love these tears on your pretty face," he kisses the corner of your eyes, drinking away your tears.
The collar of his hand around your neck, bruising your skin, the only mark of him declaring that you're his. They ain't hurt you but soothe your skin, sliding over your mouth and cheeks again, and suddenly he yanks you back, as you're now backpedaling, he throws you onto his bed, holy shit as his look at his face expression dark with passion.
Climbing onto the bed, his eyes never leave yours. His tongue pokes inside his cheeks. Thirst dripping through his dark brown eyes and you wonder were they really this dark earlier. The bed dips with his weight on it.
Does sensuality, lewdness, lust, and love shifts the color, or is it just you mayhaps you never looked deeper into his eyes earlier, however, you doubt yourself because even in dreams you know every curve, every outline of not only his eyes but his face and now his body and his every other part.
He straddles your thighs. His erection, oh good lord, his erection right between your thighs, you feel like it's poking a hole through his gray sweatpants, that are soaked up with his precum.
You grin, mouth dries up as if that's what you want to quench your thirst.
He mirrors your eyes, as he looks at his soaked pant, leaning closer to your face he grabs your jaw, "what's so funny about it?"
You're still grinning, "you're all soaked up... I'm thinking about your punishment", you arch an eyebrow, "What could it be? What about girlfriend finds out her boyfriend filling his best frie--"
His grip tightens on your jaw, cocking head, leans to your face, and bites your bottom lip, "shut your fucking mouth, don't make me force my cock into your filthy mouth, is that understood?"
You nod.
He doesn't free his leaking cock nor look at it, his eyes voyage from your exposed wet swollen pussy to your eyes then travels back to your bullet-like nipples and back to your lips. He's currently eye fucking you, and you doubt if he is the same Jungkook who was horny like minutes ago. A shiver runs across your exposed body as the air around you suddenly feels icier than before, and his gaze is desirably hot.
His lips separate with the force of his heavy breaths, eyes drifting over you like a vast ocean, heavy and deep, sinking you in lewdness.
"You can't imagine, how many times I've imagined this past few years, you on my bed naked and beautiful, every time I saw you in that yellow dress of yours, I only controlled myself from not ripping it off and grabbing these precious breasts right away," your hands clench hard by just envisioning what he disclosed on the sheets below your body, he leans forward his hand travels from your waist to your breast pinching your nipples a little hard this time, "I wondered what they would feel like, taste like, how would they look with all the hickeys I wanna give, how pretty they'll look all red and bruised up, or how will they look between my teeth", he leans down taking your right nipple between his lips sucking it for few seconds before biting it to the point, to leave a mark, his mark on your nipple.
"Daddyy", your eyes tear up, arousal between your legs torturing you.
He looks right into your eyes, grinning "I love those tears, on your face, for me, get used to it Princess", his chin just above your breast, he continues, "I was envious of your exes, they touched you when I should have", he places a feather-light kiss on your nipple, unknowingly you moan as your thighs clench beneath him he notices but doesn't flinch a bit. "You're mine, princess."
"I've imagined you, too daddy." You finally blurt out, expecting a reaction from him but he gave none. Lifting your hand to reach for his hard length straining his gray pants.
He catches your wrist and lunges forward, his breath hits your skin, his chest hovering on yours and his voice hoarse, "if you touch me, it's all over. I'm barely hanging on." You chuckle, looking at him switching from daddy to your kook within a heartbeat.
His shaky breaths, but cold hand, traces the outer edge of your breast. His other hand traps in your hair as he leans, his eyes on your lips and yours on his, then he tastes your lips.
Gliding his tongue inside your mouth, voyaging every corner of your mouth and you let him, mirroring the motions of his filthy tongue, but you get nothing, but the flavor of his tongue is familiar, you recall while kissing him as he hunts down your tongue catching it and tangling it with his. You follow him, hands on his head, moaning into his mouth licking your taste from his.
The bed frame creeks as he kisses you deeper this time, pulling you closer, seeking you with his fingers, tongue, teeth, and breaths like you are nothing more than his oxygen, silently demanding you take everything he's giving you like you two have been waiting.
"Dang, you actually know how to kiss", you say breathlessly between your kiss, as he pulls back, "now I'm envious of your exes, who tasted you as I should have already."
He chuckles, and just the sound of his chuckle vibrates your body, lighting your body with the rush of love hidden behind your heart all these years.
He leans back grabs your tits and places another kiss, a soft kiss on your lips.
"You taste like strawberries, daddy" your words invite an evil-like grin on his lips.
"Now I taste like you", his words swarm your stomach with thousands of bees.
He places kisses right below your ear, taking a lungful of your cologne, then on your neck deeply breathing in your scent on your skin, your moans fill up his room, and your hands gently roam on his back to his shoulder, achingly wanting to feel his bare back and the other on his head pressing him into your skin. And suddenly, his kisses turn into licking and then biting on your soft skin, unconsciously you dig your nails into his covered shoulder, and your other hand pulls his hair, "daddy, fuckkk, Jungkook", you whine, at the awfully rousing pain, he just gave you. Your arousal drips out of your cunt, warm.
"I need you, Daddy." Tears flood your eyes, as the words tumble out of your quivering lips breathy and unbidden.
"you have me, princess" he softly says into your skin as you feel his warm breath hitting your neck.
He lowers his head and bites your nipple, you yelp, devoured with pain, shaking against unseeable manacles and heading nowhere.
He chuckles and bites again, pulling on the bud with his unholy teeth until it stretches out of shape.
When he moves to the next one, you hold your breath and shake your head clueing him up to not repeat his demonic act. A grin conceals his kindness, as his lips graze your nipple, torturing and his eyes find your eyes with so much need floating in his dark brown eyes.
"Breathe, princess."
The minute you do as he says, he sinks his teeth. You shriek in ache and agony as you buck your hips. You feel his teeth tearing into your sensitive skin, sucking on it harder and boiling your already heated body to the nuclear level.
"Daddy, sto--, stopp Jungkookie. Fuck", your voice shrieker and breathes heavier than before.
Rolling his tongue, he licks the ungodly, unearthly, unholy burn, his voice rasps, "you really want me to stop, Princess."
You shake your head, because you know this, you wanted this for so long and can't deny the fact only from him.
Tears flood your eyes, body achingly shivers. He leans closer to your face and bares his teeth, "say it, and I'll stop."
You suck on your bottom lip and look down on his covered chest, wishing nothing but to tug his t-shirt out of his body.
God forbid, it feels like he sliced your nipples off, but they're right whole on their position, huge, motherfucking hard and rose red. With no drop of blood, he knows what he's doing.
"Where's my little bratty princess from just minutes ago?"
"You bit my poor boobs!" you whine still in incurable pain.
"You just increased your punishment," his thumb rubs on your cheeks softly, "so, take that upon yourself, if I decide on going hard on you, is that understood?"
Jungkook slides off your thighs, to lie beside you, facing you, and kisses you passionately. The heat between your thighs, makes you squirm and the pain in your bruised nipples transports you back to his sinful deed.
The hand on your hair clenches tighter, and his lips stay with yours, each bite of his teeth and roll of his tongue drops an electric shiver to your tongue traveling down to your heated core, making your hands run between your thighs, as you start circling your clit drenched with cum before you go any further he grabs your wrist harder this time and you know it's going to bruise black and blue.
He yanks your hand, with his placing between your swollen lips, you moan into his mouth, and your moan vibrates in his chest. Your fingers grasping at his shoulder.
The station of his thumb stuns you, and your clit throbs against the fiendish pressure he rubs against it. He sinks one, then two fingers inside you, and you squirm against his hand, "Jesus, Jungkook", he loves to remind you, what you need to call him, as he does by pulling out his forefinger, and pinching your clit between his thumb and forefinger, the second finger still inside your warmness.
"Fucking say my name again, say", his finger moving in and out.
"Daddy," you whisper but sounds like a whimper, your skin hot, sensitive, and bare beneath his sinister-like gaze.
"Good lord, you're so wet," he kisses your jawline, slowly placing butterfly kisses on your neck licking your skin softly to your breast as his lips graze above your nipples you jolt with shock noticing you shake, his heart-stopping grin laces his face beautifully, his fingers never rolling out your pussy.
Your hands slip down to reach for his tee. Daring to uncover him, and he didn't fight you this time. His fingers tickles, dancing over your skin, inching every corner of your skin. He leans closer to your lips sucking at your bottom lip, his breaths into your mouth, and you want him now, you want him more than you'd ever wanted anything in your life, more than every intake of oxygen.
He break away and you moan.
"Please, no daddy," your breath hitched, tears escaping your eyes and disappearing between your hairline, "please don't stop."
You fumble at the hem of his tee, clingingly desperate and wild to see him, but he calms your rushing fingers, taking your hand in his, he places a gentle kiss on your knuckles and guide your hand away. Your stomach turned upside down until you realize his grin.
He hushes you, "I'm going to make you mine."
"Make me yours", slipping your hands down to his erection, trying to stab a hole through his pants, "I want to see... You."
"Soon, princess", he says, kissing his way down to your belly, plucking away from your clingy grip, his fingers dancing around your skin.
Sucking your breath like the last drop of water as his fingers snake around your belly, unhurriedly slipping down your thighs, wittingly snubbing your swollen pussy, his mouth atop your wet pussy wilfully hitting his warm breaths on your hot skin, and your stomach twists with his wet kisses on your left thigh.
He leans closer to your pussy, watching the closeness of his mouth around your vagina your hands move into his hairline grabbing them, "I can smell you, princess. So wet." You moan, when his words slip out of his lips.
"Only for you, Daddy."
Your thighs are hot and clammy. You shake when his finger outlines the slit of your pussy, raising cold shivers across your body. Teasing your sweet pussy with nothing but his breaths, pressing his palms against your thighs, caressing and coaxing you wide for him to inhaling deep lungfuls of your wet.
"Swollen and all wet for me," he spreads you with his fingers. His hands caressing your skin, and yours nuzzling his hair.
Your tender pussy glistens with the pink neon lights and appears in all shades of pink.
Teasing you, like no one, running his thumb around your heated vagina, so gently, touching everywhere but your clit and your ragged breaths feeding him, boosting his lust.
"Daddy, please..." Your whisper.
"I always imagined your pussy, thought it was pretty but this in front of me is beautiful, princess."
"Jungko--... Daddy touch me."
He runs his tongue along your wetness giving your clit the faintest stroke. You shiver, and shock conceals your expression as your hands reach down and hold him to yourself.
And now he won't stop, he kisses you, sucking your wet dripping out as he's moving his tongue up and down, from side to side, in every direction every inch square of your swollen pink clit giving you jolts of currents that climbs your spine, and you arch. His tongue gives wet strokes until you're moving with him.
Jungkook's wet his finger and pushed one inside, but your tight pussy, clenches. You catch your breath. "Relax, princess", he whispers to soothe you. He looks up at you, your eyes are shut.
"Princess, look at me", you slowly open your eyes and met his breathtaking dark brown eyes. And you wish nothing but him to be yours.
"Just relax", he soothes you again, "enjoy this."
He works his fingers so slowly, teasing another inside, but you're so tight he couldn't push it in. He uses his mouth, tickling and sucking in a smooth rhythm until all the tension leaves you.
You begin to grind at his face, however, he continues at the same pace, keeping his moments steady enough for you to enjoy and for him to feel you taste your sweetest offering and the feel of your tender skin.
You crest without dramatics, your whispers, your gasps of breaths, your tensing muscles, and you could feel the tightness in your belly.
You twitch and arch your back, your feet curling and pressing against his back. He pauses and moves away.
Jungkook's hands are on his waistband, sliding his gray pants shaded with pre cum down his thighs.
Your eyes grow wide drowning in thirst to taste him, as you feel his huge cock against your skin. This is gonna be a painful ride.
"Are you on birth control?" He questions.
"No, why would I be?"
"But now you'll have to, princess."
"Yes, daddy," you teasingly innocently blink your eyes.
"Put your hands above your head, eyes on me."
You nod.
"Good girl",
You're nothing but a desperate little cunt for your best friend, wriggling, moaning, wobbling, squirming and aching for him.
A wild mess of hormones with pussy aching for his dick.
And it is heaven.
A demonic heaven, just yours and his.
You're his angel and he's your devil.
"Spread your legs. Daddy needs to fuck that pretty little cunt of yours, spread them," he slaps your thighs, opening your thighs wide for him you're bare to him, beautiful pussy glistening in wetness, you look into his eyes they sure are drowning in lust but there something more in those eyes.
"My submissive little princess, daddy needs to spank your drenching pussy with his hard dick, you have been nothing but an impious wilful brat",
You nod, his words make your eyes flood with tears.
"Take it like my princess."
Jungkook spanks your pussy with his hard dick, one two three and you lose count, as you can't recall the spanks you just received, shivers running across your skin, and breaths are just ragged with thirst.
His touches, his skin rubbing against your skin isn't new, feeling him deeper inside you is unusual.
And when your eyes are shut, he imperiously forces his cock inside your tight pussy. Your eyes are now wide open, "Fuck, daddy I can't take this", you shut your eyes at the pain, "kook,"
Jungkook takes his dick out, "eyes on me princess", he whispers, "calm down, relax princess. We can stop if you want me to, I can't see you like this." Without another word, he starts pulling out ever so slightly.
You look into his deep dark eyes, "No, I want you, I'm ready", you hold his wrist, stopping him before he pull out, you have hungrily waited for this.
"Are you sure? We have a lot of time for this I just need you to enjoy this moment, you get me?"
"Yes one hundred percent," you say with a nod.
He slowly, pushes his thick hard cock inside your hole, your dripping pussy clench around him, and you know your orgasm is near.
"Fuck, y/n relax, don't cum until I say, understood?"
You nod.
He pushes it at a slow pace, slowly in and slowly out. Reading your expression that is calmer than before. He increases his thrusts.
Jungkook presses himself against you, you feel him rub himself back and forth inside you teasing and pushing. It hurt for a moment, and you feel yourself open up. He leans to your neck, and his breath is quick and warm, "That's it, princess. You're taking it well."
You grab his shoulder, nails sinking into his skin.
He moves his hips and pushes against you again, and it hurt again, but then he stops.
You clench and wriggle around him, "Don't stop, Jungkook."
Tears won't stop escaping your eyes, "let me wipe away those precious tears off, for you to look into my eyes", he wipes away your tears and kisses your cheeks, "my princess."
Your pussy squeezes around him, with his words, "you are taking it so well, y/n", he groans, "I'm not finishing until you're red and puffy with pussy dripping out my cum."
You clench around him at the thought of his cum inside your pussy.
"You like the idea of your pussy filled up with my cum?" he murmurs with his breathy raspy voice.
His hips circle, small motions in and out, so gently, opening you up just to push deeper, and he stops again when you flinch.
"Fuck, Jungkook don't stop please, don't", you beg in your raspy voice.
You reach for him, pulling him close, letting him know how much you want him inside you.
"Take me," you breathe.
He kisses you on the lips and pushes. He pushes harder, and it hurts. He thrust again and again, deeper inside to feel you, it hurt but you want it so much, you don't want him to stop not now not ever, "YESSS".
"My princess..." you both are on the edge he can feel you clenching around him. You feel the warmth of his body against your bare skin, you are full of him, you feel him everywhere inside you.
You feel everything, clenching around him as he kisses your forehead. And it felt like heaven, your dream come true, Jungkook - on top of you was all you imagined every single night.
"Fuck," he hisses. "You feel so fucking amazing." He moves his hips and it feels whole inside, your heart filled with love, eyes flooded with his frame, your pussy with his hard dick, hard enough that you hold your breath, but you're so wet, you could hear it. You hear the noises as he slides in and out of your pussy.
You tightly wrap your legs around him and make yourself move, your sore body feeling incredibly weird and really intense but you're on cloud nine, euphoric.
Jungkook kisses your forehead sinking into you as you groan. You look up at him, his dark eyes burning with seductiveness. You gasp as he thrust in harder, but now you don't feel pain, his thick cock is adjusting inside your tight pussy, making your pussy his home, not painful enough like it had been, just him and you, heavy breaths and cock deeper inside you.
A beautifully slow rhythm that is making a home in your heart. He moves and you move with him. You feel him, feel him everywhere, and his everything - his breaths, his kisses, his heartbeats, his skin against yours, and his cock deeper in you.
You feel his breath on your lips, his eyes on yours, and the tension in his legs as he's pushing in and out of you. You feel so close to him, closer than you ever felt not even when you shared secrets that were meant to be buried inside your heart.
He kisses you like you're the only person, like his girlfriend, his lover, a real lover, like he wants you more than anyone else in this universe.
He tilts his hips and that's it. You suck in your breath and feel a flutter inside, and it aches a good pain until it didn't hurt at all.
He grunts and pushes hard, and the rhythm is faster than before. You hear his skin, slapping against yours, a delicious sound, and you can't stop squirming.
"I'm going to cum, princess", he whispers into your ears.
You nod, nod into his neck, pouring a wet kiss on his neck, letting him know that you're ready, his body shudders and jolts, slapping against yours. He hisses out his breath, shoving all the way in and you feel his heartbeat against your chest, and it's mirroring yours, faster.
One push and,
He shoots his come inside you.
You feel him, his warmth, his excitement. You feel the way he needs you, the way he loses control, the way he wants you, and everything between you two.
His breaths are heavy and his skin is hot and sweaty and the weight of his body pins you to bed. He is still inside you, feeling him makes you feel complete.
You are throbbing around him, and he too. You cum with him still inside you. The idea of him cum mixed with yours inside you, tingles you.
He kisses your lips and cheeks and your eyes - heavy with sleep.
He kisses all of you.
He slowly pulls out, carefully, covered with your cum mixed with his, dripping down his dick.
His hot cum starts to drip down your thighs mixed with yours and you're at the peak of vulnerability.
He picks up some wipes beside his bed, carefully wiping you off. You hold his wrist, "it's embarrassing kook, I can do this."
He hushes you, and he inches his body closer to you, tucking you and himself under the covers.
He keeps an arm around your belly as he lay beside you, kissing your shoulders and pulling you closer to him.
"I love you, with everything I am, Y/N", he hugs you and drifts into sleep.
"Kook we need to talk", exhaustion weighs heavily on your eyes.
"Not until tomorrow, right now you need to sleep, y/n,"
"But",
"No buts and ifs, you want daddy to spank you, mhmm", he whispers, a grin plastered on his lips.
"Yes", you mirror his expression.
"I really can, but looking at you seems you're breathing sleep. Sleep, princess."
"Mhmm", you nod.
He tugs you under the blanket.
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Waking up at the midnight, with his cold fingers on your bare skin, you look at the side of his bed only to find what time of the night you're suddenly awake. It's 3:30 in the morning, taking a deep breath that shakes your body a little, you try to go back into a deep sleep until you feel his thumb and forefinger drawing your attention to the motion on your abused nipple, pinching it between his tattoed fingers, turning your soft buds to sharp and hard bullets.
You both had an exhausting yet unquenchable night in the history of your life. Body - worn out, pussy - swollen, cock - squishy and limp. To satiate your hearts and soul, maybe this life isn't enough for you two your hunger, probably the next life and even the next of the next might not be enough to quench your thirst.
Your breath hitches, making him wobble, "Has he been doing this for hours." Even though he's in deep sleep, his fingers don't halt for a second. You wonder if you're going to be living with him, you'll have to get acquainted with this habit of his.
Sleep did wonders, and as of now, you're ready for another round with your daddy. You trace his tattoed fingers over your nipples and this time he pinches hard as you gasp for air. Heat oozing out of your pussy maybe summoning his name as you feel him hard against your ass.
Jungkook's warm and tingly breath touches your cold cheeks, giving you chill bumps while prickles run down your spine, reaching to your swollen yet abused pussy for taking him for hours is still thirsty for his unholy touch, for his biting mouth and venomous tongue and more of his filthy hard cock waiting for a quenchable fuck.
Sure you're still a bit drowsy but not enough to not invite another exhaustingly painful sex, with the man you have only loved for years. A roughly sleepy groan vibrates inside his chest, as his tattooed arm on your breast pulls you back against the warmth of his chest. He bites your ear, placing soft kisses down on your shoulder, "why are you still awake?" His hoarse voice sends chills across your skin.
"I just woke up, and now I can't sleep." You breathlessly answer him.
"Why?" He pulls you tight against him, taking a deep lungful scent from your hair, and making you feel every inch square of his body.
You turn around to face him, to look at his sleepy yet flawless face because what you're going to say next you need to drink him in, his cosmos of emotions, which he never lets out. "When you wake up tomorrow, I'll be already gone. So I was just savoring this moment of you being by my side, your warm breaths against my skin, your touch, your everything, Jungkook", you thumb caressing the scar on his cheek.
"How dare you think, that you'll stay there by yourself and breathe peacefully," he pulls you closer, pushing his leg between yours as he places a kiss on your forehead, "I won't let you breathe, princess. Like we always do." His words throw you back into the pool of love you both felt hours ago making your pussy clench at the mere image of being fucked by him for hours begging for release yet enjoying the denial.
"Are you coming with me?" You question his.
"I'll come but not before you come."
"Jungkook", you slap his arm softly, and a giggle slips out of your lips swollen with his hungry kisses.
"I love you, princess"
"I love you, daddy", paying heed to these unholy words from your lips makes him press his lips against your lips and this is only the beginning of another unquenchable round.
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© 𝐥𝟎𝐦𝐥𝐣𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐣𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐤𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟐 - 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲/ 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭/ 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞. All rights reserved.
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babystrcandy · 11 hours ago
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the lucky one (pt. 2) | jjk
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summary: Growing up you only had one goal: beat Jeon Jungkook. Sometimes you'd win, other times you'd lose. Sometimes he'd lose, other times he'd win. But you'd both walk away from the match thinking the other was the lucky one.
pairing: jungkook x fem!reader rating/genre: 18+ Minors DNI | sports au, e2l/r2l, angst, fluff, smut word count: 27.9K chapter summary: After three years of no contact, a career-changing injury, and one chance encounter of the two of you joining the same professional badminton team, Jeon Jungkook's suddenly your shadow again.  warnings/notes: typos probably, three year time skip, explicit language, casual drinking, excessive drinking, implied alcoholism, implied suicidal thoughts, jungkook and oc have bad coping habits, nail biting, anxiety, small mention of blood, fights...lots of them, eyebrow piercing jungkook, tattooed jungkook, jungkook means well but oc can’t see it, hoseok has all the secrets, dirty talk, needy!jungkook (kinda), jungkook thinks you’re deadly nightshade but can’t stop touching you, oc and jungkook’s stupid challenges, let’s not get into jk’s oral fixation, he rly (i mean rly) wants to fuck you, degradation kink, fingering, nipple play, oral sex (f. receiving), protected sex, squirting, brief finger sucking, eye contact (he can’t get enough of it), he likes his kisses :,)...and your tits, don’t ask why...he talks to your puthy, nothing (i mean basically nothing) is resolved or is it (?), this was a lot and took me a lot longer than intended, buttt i hope you enjoy, my loves <3
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chapter two: good night, belladonna ( ← previous | next → )
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IN RETROSPECT, YOU SHOULD’VE expected your life to erupt into the chaotic shit-show it had become in the past few years. Three years, to be exact. Three years since that day on the court; the day you lost sight of reality and landed in the hospital. Three years since your career came to a standstill all thanks to Jeon Jungkook.
You still remembered the feel of a new racket in your grasp; the warmth blooming in your chest when you’d win a match. You remembered it all, and it’d haunted you for three years now, serving as your motivator.
You’d do anything to get back on that court; to be the best once again.
And for three years, you’d been working toward that goal.
You would’ve liked to say it was an easy journey. It was anything but.
The first year was spent in recovery, trying to learn how to walk properly again. At times, it wasn’t clear if you’d make a full recovery. And during those times, you’d turn to overworking—running instead of walking. It never worked out in your favor.
Getting used to being . . . less; to being replaceable was indescribable. You had always been at the top; the best. You’d set the fastest speed for women’s college badminton many times, oftentimes even beating your own scores. You were set to be offered contracts from professional team after team, sending your career into an abundance of success.
But after that fall, it all went to shit.
In the blink of an eye, you were nothing more than lost potential.
Even after your injury had healed and you’d spent the next two years after that training, you were still so much less than you had been three years ago. No offers came your way; no interest; nothing.
The only team that offered you a spot was Yunis, a low-grade mixed doubles team who could only pay you nineteen million won due to your . . . skills (or lack thereof). Even then, you’d be joining the team halfway through the season, and you had a demeaning suspicion that the only reason they’d even accepted you had to do with the fact they were extremely low on members. (Which you thought was odd considering how late in the season it was, but you really weren’t complaining (not that you even had room to complain).)
So you were considered replaceable and perhaps even useless, but you had greed in your veins and drive pushing you forward. You’d be the best again; you had to be.
Badminton was your purpose. There was no without.
And now as you sat in some crowded bar near the outskirts of the city, surrounded by your new teammates, reality sunk in. Everything came back to you—the injury, the recovery, the hardships, everything. You saw your whole life in front of your eyes and it’d all led you here.
You’d be a liar if you held your head high and claimed you weren’t terrified out of your mind. Because you were. God, your heart hadn’t stopped pounding in your chest, threatening to break through your ribs since the moment you arrived at the training center that early morning. It only worsened throughout the day as you met with the coach, briefly touring the center before you were sent off to the dormitories.
From there, you were sure your heart was in your throat as you met with the girls already living in the dormitory, who later on took you over to the boys’ dormitory to introduce you to the rest of the team.
Luckily you weren’t the only new member. In fact, there had been two other new members—one girl and one guy, but you had been too inside your own head to learn their names (not that you really cared to either.) But . . . unluckily . . . as you shook each of their hands—new and old members—you were sure they could feel the amount of sweat you were perspiring, which made you deem that entire day as a shit-show.
Because, really, it was like: Hey, nice to meet you. New teammate here, clammy hands, subpar skills and all . . . please don’t turn me away.
So in other words—pathetic.
You’d never reached such a low before. Before the accident, people steered clear of you on your team. You were unapproachable and unwilling to help. You liked what you liked and you didn’t budge. But now, now no one knew who you were and it was almost as if you were starting life all over again, leaving your legacy behind for some other bright player to take advantage of. Now it was clammy hands and training at all hours just to catch up with everyone else.
Everything was new, and you hated it.
You especially hated how every time they’d bring up a new play they’d been working on during practice, they’d turn to you and attempt to explain it . . . as if you’d never touched a racket before.
(Downside of joining the team halfway through the season, you supposed. Or maybe they’d seen your application tape and deemed you an amateur.)
Whatever. Point blank: there was no explanation for the anger and frustration you felt, but you were sure you could think of one word—humilating.
But you didn’t feel like blowing your shot on this team too soon, so what seemed like the best decision was keeping your mouth clamped shut and smiling at their so-called helpful comments. But you couldn’t help but think just how disappointed you would’ve been in yourself had this happened to you three years ago.
Again . . . humiliating.
But there wasn’t much else for you to do. You were out of options; out of potential; out of purpose. Play by the rules, fit in, then you could get back to the top charts.
It would just take time.
One tricky problem though: you’d always been impatient.
So as the night began, you and your new apparent teammates were still seated around a large table in the center of the bar, conversing amongst yourselves. Only, you weren’t. No, you kept your mouth shut as promised, playing into whoever this new person you had become was. You pushed your impatience down, your anger, frustration, humiliation, all of it . . . you pushed it all down and trained your eyes on your hands that were folded in your lap.
You’d never been much of a nail-biter, but in recent years, your pent-up aggression could only be muted so much. Occasionally this anger would bottle up, choking you with anxiety and leaving you with no other choice but to sit there and bite on the skin around your nails while your mind spiraled out of control.
That very same night you felt the urge to lean your elbow on the table, bring your thumb to your mouth, and take out your frustration on the hangnail you’d caught sight of just seconds ago. It was a habit you couldn’t hide—a visible sign of the amount of rage bottled up inside of you.
Could you even call it rage anymore? It had turned into so much more than that.
You weren’t sure what to call this anymore.
Rage was the only thing you could fathom, everything else seemed too . . . weak, and you still weren’t used to being . . . less. Rage had been one of the many things you’d been good at in your youth. Rage had always been there, like a guiding hand on your shoulder, keeping you on the right track. Nothing else really visited you. It was always just rage and determination and drive. You were a machine with only one goal.
Now you were someone who bit their nails when everything became a little too . . . much.
Your eyes narrowed in on your thumb, taking note of the chewed skin. Even the dot of dried blood in the crease of your nail you caught sight of. You supposed you’d bit a little deeper than you intended, but it was nothing out of the ordinary. And right now, as you heard one of your teammates, Jung Hoseok (you thought was his name), change the topic to the new speaker he’d bought, all you could think was just how much you wanted to cave into the temptation and bring your thumb to your lips.
But you resisted, covering your thumb with your other hand as your eyes snapped shut. You inhaled deeply, then exhaled slowly just as your eyes opened, gaze lifting up toward reality.
And just as you had checked yourself back into the present, Hoseok (again, you could’ve gotten his name wrong, but whatever) briefly glanced around the table, then asked, "Should we wait for him?"
"Why should we?" came from a girl on the team (now . . . you were sure you hadn’t learned her name (you weren’t even sure if she’d even given it to you)). “He didn’t bother to show up to practice anyway. Nobody knows where he went off to now.”
Hoseok shrugged. "We're a team. Coach will bitch about it.”
The girl rolled her eyes. "Yeah, right. Besides . . . like Jeon even cares about that. He'll end up drinking himself to sleep at the bar anyway."
Your brows scrunched, and you almost laughed out of pure annoyance. Jeon. The name seemed to follow you everywhere. Correction, the reminder of the boy attached to the name seemed to follow you everywhere.
But . . .
. . . there was no real threat. You knew it wasn’t him. It couldn’t be.
The last time you saw Jeon Jungkook was on that damned court. You’d made sure to avoid him, and eventually, he’d gotten the hint. He even stopped coming to the family outings. His mother always claimed he was busy with the new league he’d joined, but you knew the truth—he was avoiding you as much as you were avoiding him.
He hated you, and you hated him. It was as simple as that. Time had only solidified this notion in your mind.
It wasn’t him. This Jeon was another person.
Jeon Jungkook was gone. He was probably signed to South Korea’s professional badminton team, on his way to the Olympics no doubt. But you had no real clue, because . . . truthfully . . . you didn’t have the heart to keep up with his career through news reports.
It hurt too much to see him live the life you were supposed to; the life he’d stolen from you. Letting yourself know where he’d ended up would only be torture. You’d stick to biting your nails. It seemed like the less harmful option.
Still, you couldn’t help but ask, "Who?"
All eyes turned to you. It was the first word you’d spoken in a while, and the rest of the team no doubt had probably forgotten you were even there (that would, at least, explain their wide eyes).
But no one called attention to this, instead, Hoseok replied with a muted smile, "Some washed-up loser. You'll meet him soon enough, rest assured.”
You only nodded.
And everything went back to the way it was.
The rest of the team had quickly all sent one person to go order the drinks. You hadn’t even noticed anyone had left, tuning out the multiple conversations as your gaze landed on your nails again. It wasn’t until a shot of soju was being placed down in front of you that you realized you had been drifting again. Still, you didn’t snap out of your mind all too quickly. Instead, you settled for quietly thanking the member for the shot, downing it, before your eyes drifted back to your nails once again.
You’d never been much for crowds. Hell, you much preferred to stay at home and watch old plays, trying to figure out the kinks in your form and execution. You liked the quiet, not this. (You supposed that was your first mistake—agreeing to come out with the rest of the team.)
The only time you’d ever truly felt comfortable in a crowded room was that night three years ago when Jungkook—
No.
You nearly shook your head at your thoughts.
No.
Closing your eyes once again, you brought your thumb to your lips, anxiously biting at the skin around your nail. You wouldn’t let yourself admit those thoughts. Never once had you found comfort in Jeon Jungkook. You were sure of that. You were so sure.
Hate. That was all you felt when you thought of the boy . . . man now, you supposed . . . wherever he had ended up. You only felt hate. Just hate.
With rage and hate clouding your mind, you hadn’t realized how much skin you had bitten off until a pinch of pain met your senses. A soft gasp escaped you as you glanced down, finding you’d bitten off more than you could chew as a dot of blood slowly bubbled just at the corner of your nail. Quickly, you nursed the wound, wiping away the blood and applying pressure with your other hand.
But the cut still bled.
And you resorted to lifting your thumb to your lips once again, sucking on the wound.
It continued to bleed, and you nearly groaned in annoyance. Fantastic—another consequence of your actions.
As you continued to fuss over your still bleeding thumb, you missed the door to the bar opening, another figure entering the scene. You hadn’t even noticed your teammates turn to see the person approach the group, standing at the head of the table . . . until you heard the sound of their voice.
"Started without me? I'm hurt, guys," the person asked, voice deep and mocking.
You stilled. No.
"Nurse the wound," Hoseok responded, annoyance evident in his tone. “Get a drink.”
No.
The person’s voice came again, smooth and deep and so dreadfully familiar as he hummed, "Gladly.”
No. You knew that voice.
"Jeon, these are the new members," Hoseok interrupted your thoughts again, gesturing to the three of you as your heart beat so fiercely in your chest.
No.
Only then did you glance up to confirm your suspicions. And much to your dismay, there stood Jeon Jungkook at the head of the table, looking almost the same as when you’d last seen him. It was almost as if he were a photo in one of your mother’s photo albums brought to life.
You swallowed, your throat suddenly dry. No, no, no.
"Ah, first day?" Jungkook asked the new male recruit, eyes solely on him but not meeting his gaze straight on, before flicking to the girl.
He hadn’t seen you yet. You were sure of that. His eyes were still trained on the male recruit, throwing back a few formalities with that damned grin on his face. God, no.
It was true, he hadn’t seen you yet, but you’d seen him. You almost couldn’t believe it as you stared at him, eyes slightly widened and lips parted while you took in his appearance. Not much to your surprise, his style hadn’t changed. He wore a baggy black tee paired with gray sweatpants that were adorned with your old college’s logo. His hair was still long and black just like how you remembered him, but it wasn’t nearly long enough to tie back into a small ponytail like he’d done in the past.
But perhaps the most jarring change about the Jungkook you’d grown up with had to be the fact that he now sported a whole sleeve of tattoos on one of his arms. Not to mention all the piercings from the multiple hoops in his ears to the one on his lip even to the one on his eyebrow.
He looked . . . older. Hell, if you were being generous, you’d go as far as to say he looked perhaps even a little more mature. And if you were being really generous, you’d let yourself shamelessly admit just how kindly the years had treated him. He’d grown into his nose a little more and it seemed like he didn’t mind smiling with his teeth as much as he had when you were both younger.
Because, no, that familiar small smirk he’d always wear on his face hadn’t touched his lips once in those few minutes. Instead, a wide charming grin was plastered there, his teeth on display. It was the type of smile he’d only give you moments before he shot a spitball your way or gave you an unfortunate wet-willy.
It was almost attractive.
You blinked in denial. No.
There was no way you could allow yourself to think those things. This was the same man who had set you up to fail on that court. He’d sabotaged your career, and he was there. He was there right now, standing before you, a charming grin on his face and he felt so very very familiar.
No, no, no. Fuck, no.
You had to get out of there. This . . . this you couldn’t deal with right now. You’d already been on edge the entire day and coming face-to-face with him was the complete opposite of what you needed. You had to get out of there. You had to.
You’d deal with the consequences tomorrow. Fuck today.
But it was too late.
Even if you stood and charged out the door, he’d still see you. He’d see you no matter what, and all you could think was just how unlucky you truly were. It appeared the world had some personal vendetta against you. That only angered you more.
And, then, as if this nightmare couldn’t have gotten any worse, Jungkook spoke again. "Well, I'm pleased to welcome you all to Hell," he began as his eyes flicked across the table. "It'll only get worse from here. Trust—"
His eyes found yours, a beat of strained silence followed.
Under his gaze, you realized he was taking you in just as you had done to him mere minutes ago. His eyes widened only slightly, not enough for anyone else to catch on but enough for you to notice, and there was something about the way the corner of his tips tipped up in a ghost of a smile as if he were actually pleased to see you, but that couldn’t be true.
No, there was hate in his eyes. There had to be. You convinced yourself there was because there was absolutely no way the same man who had ruined your chances at greatness was staring at you with a certain fondness in his eyes—the same eyes you once thought were warm and inviting.
Nothing about him had been fond in so long. Not since the two of you were eleven. And especially not now.
But then, he spoke.
"Hey . . . " he murmured, his voice soft unlike anything you’d ever heard.
Another beat of silence.
Then it hit you.
Hey. That was all he had said. Hey. A simple fucking hey.
For three years you had been recovering. For three years you’d avoided him, blamed him, hated him. For three years you were sure he knew all of this to be true. And yet . . . after three years the first thing he had decided to say was . . . ‘hey’.
It was a slap in the face; a hard one at that.
The simple word was enough to set a wildfire off inside of you. There was no doubt in your mind that this man despised you. In the past, it had been a passive-aggressive rivalry. But now? Now he’d shown you just exactly who he had become. No amount of tattoos or piercings could convince you otherwise. Jeon Jungkook was still the same person he had always been with only one goal: put you in your place.
But you wouldn’t sit still. You were not to be tamed, and you sure as hell wouldn’t let Jungkook have something over you ever again.
You wouldn’t let him win. Not again.
This was your second chance, not his to ruin. It already seemed like half the team was on the edge about him, and you’d be damned if you let him put you on that level with him. This was your team now; your chance to get to the top once again. He wouldn’t take that from you. Your plan was to (shamelessly) kiss-ass your way onto everyone’s good side, train and train and train until you could call yourself a decent player. Your plan did not include him.
So it came as no surprise to you when you raised a brow, challenging him. An odd sense of deja vu hit you then, all at once (but, of course, you ignored it).
Jungkook’s brows twitched, but he didn’t speak a word. Good, you thought.
But it was Hoseok who brought the two of you back to reality with a simple question, "Uh . . . do you guys know each other or something?"
"No," you spat almost all too quickly, trying to cover up the bitterness in your voice by clearing your throat.
Jungkook’s face fell then, but you paid it no mind. It wasn’t like he kept the expression on his face for too long anyway. The next second, he’d blinked, wet his lips, and exhaled a gravelly, "We don't.”
The next second moved slowly. It moved so slowly you weren’t sure if you’d been transported back in time or if you were really losing it, sleep deprivation and your nerves getting the better of you. But one moment your eyes were on Jungkook as he stood at the head of the table, then the next he was walking toward your end, approaching (unfortunately) the only open seat that just so happened to be directly in front of you.
At the realization, you stiffened, trying to back away from the table as much as you could without making it obvious. But Jungkook didn’t sit right away. No, just your luck, he still stood, only now he stood tall before you and he was . . . stretching out his hand toward you.
With no other options, you slowly glanced up, having to crane your neck slightly as your eyes met Jungkook’s soft gaze. He raised a brow, gesturing toward his hand, and you realized what he was asking of you.
“Jeon Jungkook,” he announced in a soft hum, tilting his hand ever so slightly as if he were trying to bait you or rather coax you into shaking it.
And while you were trying to play the part of this generous team player to get on everyone’s good side, you couldn’t bring yourself to lock hands with him. Instead, you found yourself clenching your hands into fists as you mumbled out in the sweetest tone that you could manage, “I don’t shake hands.”
Jungkook furrowed his brows, and you could’ve sworn you caught sight of the corners of his lips twitching upward. The asshole found this amusing.
You refrained from slapping his still outstretched hand. Fucker.
“Sanitary issue?” Jungkook went on, no doubt reveling in taunting you all the while he slowly lowered his hand to the chair, beginning to pull it out.
He was sitting in front of you the next second, chin resting on his clasped hands while his eyes flicked across your face, watching you carefully. It was almost as if he were trying to get you to drop the act; as if he were saying ‘Go on, I know who you really are’. And worst of all . . . you realized he did know who you really were, and that made you grow hot with rage for him all the more.
He was taunting you. He’d thought he had this in the bag; that he’d won.
Well . . . he wouldn’t.
With that thought raging inside your head, you plastered on your best fake smile and said, “Got me.”
Jungkook only tongued his inner cheek in an attempt to stifle his grin. And you bit your tongue, trying not to glare at him as you turned back to the group.
“So, when does Coach want us at the center again?” you asked, desperately trying to change the subject.
Sure, maybe the question would make you seem a little inadequate, but you couldn’t handle sitting there with Jungkook staring at you like that all the while your teammates were probably left to wonder if the two of you had been telling the truth. Because, truth be told, if you stayed silent any longer, you were sure anyone would be able to tell that you and Jungkook knew more about each other than you let on.
And it seemed your diversion had worked as Hosweok blinked, then immediately sprung into action. He not only told you the time training was to start, but went in depth about what exactly your coach would instruct the team to do during it.
He was dedicated, you noted. And you decided you didn’t mind him. Perhaps he reminded you a little of an old teammate from your college. Perhaps you saw a little of Kim Yurim in him, and that was why you found yourself wondering if you could really grow to like this team.
However, as usual, your fond, pleasant thoughts never lasted long.
You should’ve learned by now.
But . . .
As Hoseok went on, you were reminded of this notion. Hoseok was interrupted by none other than Jungkook as he reached across the table, wrapping his hand around your wrist. You nearly jumped out of your skin at the feeling of his touch, but you refrained trying to keep your cool as your gaze landed on him.
Your mouth opened, a question hanging from your tongue, but Jungkook was one step ahead of you.
“You a nail biter, new girl?” was all he asked as he gently (so gently you almost had to take a sharp inhale) angled your thumb (with now dried and fresh blood trapped between the crevices of your nail) toward him.
You swallowed, desperate to rip your hand from his grasp but careful to remind yourself that you had to behave in front of this new team. So, instead, you settled for a simple, “Guilty.”
His eyes snapped to yours, a grin tipping on one side of his mouth. It was a simple gesture, but you understood it all the same. He saw right through you. (You hated admitting that he always had.)
Half expecting him to continue mocking you, you attempted to release your hand from his grip, trying not to snap and make a fool of yourself in front of the rest of your team on the first day no less. But Jungkook only tightened his grip on your wrist before he pulled your hand closer toward him. His eyes never left the roughly crackled, chewed skin, his brows furrowed with a concentration look etched across his face.
Then, his eyes flicked to your face, his brows still furrowed as he generously took in your features from the downward curve of your lips to the tiny scar just on the cusp of your chin from an injury long ago. But his gaze didn't linger long before he fixed his sights on your hand once again. It was almost as if he were trying to figure out if this hand truly belonged to you; as if he couldn't wrap his head around the fact that you bit your nails until they bled; as if it were so unlike the girl he'd known growing up.
And . . . perhaps he was right.
"It's a bad habit," he finally mumbled, eyes still trained on your fingers.
Your brows twitched once in confusion. A second time in denial. And a third in acceptance.
It was a bad habit.
But . . . what did he know of bad habits? And why, why, why did it look as if he actually cared about this specific bad habit of yours? Your mind was a warzone, too many unanswered questions swarming around.
Then in the midst of your haze, he was suddenly gone, his warm touch leaving your skin as he leaned back into his chair, muscular arms crossed over his broad chest. And you were left speechless, glancing from him to the hand he'd been holding.
Still, your act was on the line. There was no way you’d let anyone know you and Jungkook knew more about each other than you let on. And if they hadn’t found out already from that odd . . . odd exchange, then they surely would if you kept gawking at him.
Instead, you acted quick, shaking your head and clearing your throat as you muttered out a simple, “I'm aware.”
Jungkook only nodded. Once.
And you forced yourself to look away.
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Later in the night, you allowed yourself to look again. A second glance. It was harmless. (Completely harmless.)
But . . .
. . . There he was—Jeon Jungkook. He sat opposite of you, occupying the only available seat left while the rest of your teammates conversed amongst each other. To say it was the most uncomfortable you’d ever felt would’ve been an understatement.
Jeon Jungkook had been something of a shadow the past few years. You’d avoided him like the plague, even going as far as to skip family gatherings and cookouts just so you wouldn’t have to run into him. 
No one knew what had happened between the two of you. No one knew you blamed him for what happened to you on that court. No one except the two of you knew.
He’d always been in the back of your mind like an afterthought. And you’d had a lot of time to think, letting his shadow drift back in every so often.
The thought of him always made rage boil in your bloodstream. But there were times when you’d be lying in your bed, leg propped up to ease the pain when your rage and your thoughts collided. And every single time you’d be haunted by his face that night; by the words he’d shared with you; the way he’d touched you.
Did I do something wrong? He’d asked that not once but twice, and sometimes you let yourself wonder if his intentions had been true; if he really hadn’t intended to screw you over. Because that night you’d really believed that there might have been more to Jeon Jungkook than you once thought. 
But believing in that would mean that you had been wrong; believing in that meant that the ruination of your career had all been done by your hand and your hand alone. 
And that couldn’t be. You couldn’t be the reason you’d ended up like this. You couldn’t handle that. It’d surely break you.
Jeon Jungkook was to blame. You were sure of that. Just him. Only him.
He hated you. He always had; that was why he’d teased and prodded at you in your youth. 
It was his fault. Solely his. 
(You didn't and would never acknowledge the fact that, deep down, you blamed him because it was all you could fathom. Because it was easier.)
And you still blamed him now.
Rage boiled in your blood as you glared at him. Of course, out of all the teams you could’ve been accepted into . . . it just had to be the same one Jeon Jungkook had decided to join.
You should’ve expected this. The odds had never been on your side. You were never the lucky one. 
What was yours had always been Jeon Jungkook’s as well. It’d been like that since the day you were born; since the day he was, too.
Jeon Jungkook was your shadow just as much as you were his. There was no doubt in your mind that this very fact would loom over your shoulders until the day you were taken to the weeds (Jungkook most likely following in your lead three days and exactly four minutes later if cruel fate would have it).
At the thought, your eyes narrowed at him as you crossed your arms over your chest. Only, this didn't go unnoticed by Jungkook. No, instead, it seemed he'd caught sight of your aggression out of the corner of his eye. A corner of his mouth twitched upward before he turned his head, gaze quickly landing on you. And just like when the two of you were kids, you didn't back down, your eyes staying on his face as they narrowed and narrowed. His amusement only furthered . . . just like when the two of you were kids.
It was almost funny how time seemed to blend together then. He was giving you that same look that he would always send your way before saying something that would no doubt prompt you to roll your eyes. And he was giving it to you now.
So you waited.
You waited for him to say the stupid thing on his mind. It was decided then that you'd wait to see what he had to say, then you'd promptly roll your eyes like you had done multiple times in your youth. Only, no words tumbled from his tongue; he just kept staring, the small, amused smile tipped on one side of his face.
Oddly enough, it still sent you back in time--to the day of your graduation; the day you walked down your staircase, dressed in a ceremonial dress paired with your graduating cap and gown; the day you caught sight of Jeon Jungkook already waiting at the bottom of the stairs, wearing his father's hand-me-down suit while he gripped his cap and gown in his hand, no doubt refusing to put it on until the ceremony.
Both of your parents had already been downstairs with him, telling him to smile with his teeth (like he'd always hated) so they could capture picture after picture of him, all the while they waited on you to join them after you readied yourself to your liking. But your parents hadn't seen you first that day. No, it was Jungkook who--in the midst of groaning about how his cheeks were beginning to hurt from all the smiling--glanced up the staircase, impatience written across his features and in the way he tapped his fingers against the banister. 
Then he'd seen you. You remembered how those round brown eyes found yours, and you halted in the middle of the staircase, confusion striking you first. His normal response would've been to make fun of you for doing your hair and fixing make-up on your face; he was supposed to tease you about the dress you'd decided to wear. Up until that point, your normal attire consisted of badminton skirts and unflattering athletic tees. You wore sweat as your perfume and only cared about how to do better; how to be better. None of your concern ever went into your appearance because you hadn't cared (there was also the fact you hadn't found your style yet, but still).
Badminton was consuming back then (it still was).
You had always been a machine first, human second. But you remembered wanting to try that day. And you had. You'd even gone out of your way to buy something from a little boutique just in town--a long, flowy white dress that hugged you perfectly and complimented you well. You had wanted to feel like a teenage girl that day, not some heartless machine that only cared about winning.
Even now you remembered the exact moment you felt like you were normal that day. And it embarrassed you all the same.
The moment Jungkook looked up at you, his eyes wide, you first expected him to taunt him . . . only for him to smile instead. That was the exact moment. He'd smiled up at you (the same smile he was sending your way now, years later), his eyes taking in your appearance with a certain fondness etched across his features. It had made you feel like a person or rather a teenage girl who just wanted a boy to look her way and tell her she was pretty, instead of like she was some pawn in a game.
Nothing ever really happened that day. You supposed that was why it embarrassed you now--the fact that you had once gotten yourself so worked up over a simple look.
And now . . . years and years later . . . he was still giving you that look. (Most embarrassing of all? It still managed to make you feel like a teenage girl.)
But you weren't a teenage girl anymore, and you certainly didn't need some man to come around to make you feel pretty. You didn't need that. You didn't want that. Simple touches from men who didn't care past what you could do for them were not what you wanted or had ever wanted. Maybe Jungkook thought you were over what happened between the two of you or maybe he thought you'd sleep with him regardless of that very fact. You didn't care which one was the truth or if any of them were even true at all, you wouldn't stoop that low ever again. You weren't over any of it, and some look was certainly not going to change your mind.
So this time when you looked away, you didn't indulge yourself in another glance.
You lost yourself in your surroundings then, and you realized one thing: maybe you'd come to like this team. Hoseok seemed alright. The others . . . well . . . you'd learn their names eventually. Sure, Jungkook was a little bump in the road, but you could easily ignore him. You had been doing exactly that for the past three years so you didn't see the trouble in it.
Only . . . a little while later, you glanced down at your phone, finding the time quickly. No one had asked you a question in thirty-five minutes. And for some reason, your mind began to spin. You began to wonder if you even really fit in with them; if you could get to their level; if you could be better like you had always been taught to be. And unbeknownst to you, while locked inside your own head, you slowly brought your thumb to your lips again, beginning to anxiously chew at the already abused skin around your thumbnail.
However, before you could cause your thumb to bleed once again, you felt the toe of a shoe kick your shin. With a soft gasp of shock, you jolted in your seat, quickly bringing a hand down to massage your shin as your eyes flicked up only to meet Jungkook's gaze that was already fixed on you.
The asshole had kicked you. He actually kicked you. 
Your head tilted to the side, eyes narrowing as if you were asking him, What the fuck?
Jungkook only shrugged.
Oh, that--
Then, you watched as he looked away from you for the first time that night. And you felt a tinge of annoyance bubble in your chest, causing your jaw to clench. It felt as though no time had passed; like the two of you were still twenty-two years old trying to get under each other's skin while your parents drank wine with simple conversation. It felt as though no time had passed because you still felt the urge to kick him back like an immature teenager just to see if you could get under his skin as much as he had gotten under yours in the time he'd entered the bar.
Instead, you watched with careful eyes, narrowing your gaze at him as he reached across the table to pour himself another shot of soju. You knew his tolerance was high from your years spent together during high school and throughout college. But he’d been pouring and swigging shots back ever since he got there. (A little excessive if you had to comment.)
You furrowed your brows and shook your head ever so slightly. Whatever. Jeon Jungkook could damage his liver all he wanted. It wasn’t your concern.
Out of the corner of your eye, you watched as he grabbed a beer bottle from the middle of the table, popped it open and swigged back some of its contents. You tapped your fingers against the table, confusion ticking you one, two, three times as the seconds passed.
Jungkook liked to drink. You’d known that. But never this much. Never during the season. (You wouldn’t admit it to yourself, but you wondered just how much had changed about the boy you once knew and the man he was now.)
Had he—
But . . . your thoughts were cut off by the devil himself . . .
“Want a beer, new girl?”
At the sound of his voice, your eyes snapped up, meeting Jungkook's brown ones. They were still round and wide, almost innocent. But the second you blinked, eyes getting a second look at him, there was a certain darkness clouding over his gaze, as if the years had truly taken their toll on him just as they had done for you.
But that couldn't be.
Jungkook had always been different from anyone you'd ever met before. He hadn't cared about . . . well . . . anything. Life was life and if shit things happened then shit things happened. The only thing he ever really seemed to care about was himself. You couldn't fathom what exactly could've taken its toll on him. That, along with why he was on this D-list team, were the two questions roaming around in your head.
Why was he here? Why was he looking at you like that? Why?
The questions remained on your mind as you glanced between his face and his hand as he reached for another beer at the center of the table. Why was he acting this way? Did he want to get under your skin? See you slip up once again? Ruin you two times over?
You clenched your teeth together, eyes narrowing as they met his gaze for a third time. No, you decided. You wouldn't let him win. Whatever this was . . . you weren't having it, not after everything.
"I'm not a beer person," you interjected before he could place the beer bottle in front of you. And with that, you pushed out the chair, briefly cringing at the screech it made before you turned to head to the open bar (you, however, didn't turn fast enough before you caught sight of the taken-back look he sent your way).
The bar was sticky. Drunk men lounging on the stools while some sports game blared on the television above. But you didn’t care. You’d wait there all night if you had to; anything to get away from him.
A minute passed. You were sure of it. The bartender definitely had asked you what you wanted, but you hadn’t replied. You just wanted out. Maybe you could fake an illness before Jungkook got bored by the table and decided bothering you was his favorite thing once again.
And just as you had suspected, three minutes and four seconds later, a shadow appeared from behind you. From the scent of his cologne . . . you already knew who it was.
"I don't want to talk to you," you bit out, eyes on your chewed nails as you tried to distract yourself.
He blew air through his nose—an unusual laugh he only did sometimes. (Normally he was loud. Loud and hearty. Rarely ever quiet.) “Just did," he hummed, leaning on the bar counter.
"Shut up.”
"No can do.”
You turned to him then, eyes fierce and stern, glaring straight into those doe-brown eyes that feigned innocence. “What do you want?" the words felt bitter on your tongue.
Jungkook furrowed his brows, but you caught onto the slight smirk tugging at his lips. “What d'you mean? Just trying to be hospitable," he explained, shrugging.
"Jungkook—“
"Ah—“ he interrupted, snapping his fingers together— “so you do remember my name, yeah?”
You clenched your teeth. The years of jealousy and rage spilled back in, filling you to the brim. You thought maybe he had changed even just by a little. No. He was just the same as he had always been.
It seemed Jungkook had caught sight of your clenching fists and tight jaw as he tsked at you. “Careful," he warned, subtly pointing to the table where your teammates sat. “They're watching. Can't blow our cover."
You only narrowed your eyes. Asshole.
Jungkook remained amused. “How long has it been? Three years?" His eyes raked down your body, a grin sliding onto his face as he slowly set his gaze on your face once again. “You look well."
You raised a brow, crossing your arms over your chest. “I am.” Mirroring him, you looked him up and down but with disgust evident on your face, before you met his gaze once again and shot him a sickly sweet smile. “You look horrible."
That only earned you a grin, although it was small and didn't reach his eyes. "Always a pleasure with you," he remarked, the shit-eating grin still on his face, but you caught onto the tone in his voice.
His tone . . . It was odd, almost like you weren't actually talking to him. The Jungkook you remembered had a different tinge to his voice. He was always sporting the same grin that he was sending your way at that very moment . . . but . . . it had always reached his eyes. Why didn't it now?
There were a lot of questions that remained unanswered. A lot of them you knew you'd never find out. The look in his eyes being one of them. (You reminded yourself that you didn't care, anyways. You didn't care if his eyes were dull and there were stress lines where there hadn't been years ago. You didn't care. You didn't.) The only thing you cared about was finding out how he, of all people, ended up here on the same team as you.
A curse or cruel fate? Whatever. It didn't matter. What mattered was the fact that he stuck out like a sore thumb. He didn't belong here with these low-grade players. He'd always been at the top of the charts. It was one of the things you found most irritating about him--the fact that he wasn't an amateur.
So this . . . this didn't make any sense.
Being on this team was one step away from retirement, not on the path to the Olympics. Jungkook didn't belong here. He didn't belong in Busan, either. You knew this well because you used to be in the same boat . . . until he ruined that for you, too.
Still . . . he ended up here.
And so did you.
How?
Your brows furrowed at the question. How? Why? Why was Jungkook here? It didn't make any sense. And then you met his gaze once again, and the urge to ask consumed you, "Why are you here?"
Jungkook faltered, and you almost let your thoughts wander, but he masked his actions quickly, shrugging before you could dissect him more. He tilted his head to the side, weighing the question before he hummed out, "Mmm, Wooshik normally pays for the drinks, so--"
But you cut him off with a scoff. "No, I mean . . . why are you here," you reiterated, pointing to the ground between the two of you. A pause met your lips before you wet them and sucked in a heavy breath, then continued. "I thought you were on your way to the Olympics."
He'd known what you meant the first time. The both of you did. But now, now he couldn't make a joke of things to release himself from your harsh stare. And for a second you thought you'd beaten him. You thought he'd cave in and answer the questions raging on inside your head, But . . . you should've known better.
"Ah . . . right," the Jeon boy sighed, his voice still light. "Change of plans. Didn't want to go. This pays."
You nearly scoffed. Of course. A damn lie. "Unbelievable," you muttered under your breath.
"That was always your dream, not mine, remember?"
That ignited something within you, a muscle twitching in your jaw. "Well--" your eyes met his again, glare harsher now-- "now you've ruined that for the both of us."
"Guess so."
You tilted your chin higher. "What?" you paused, raising a brow in the form of a silent challenge. "No apology?"
Jungkook studied your face for a few seconds, doe eyes boring into yours almost as if he were challenging you back like the two of you used to do when you were kids. Catching onto this, you stood a little taller. But unlike all the times before, Jungkook breathed through his nose, the corners of his mouth twitching upward into an almost sad (?) smile. 
The next second, he turned away from you. "Hey, man--" he tapped two fingers on the bar counter, gaining the eyes of the bartender serving the customers beside you-- "one whiskey sour." His eyes flicked to you once again, but there was no challenge in his stare. "There's your apology."
Then, he was gone, leaving you alone at the bar. And you didn't watch him leave. No, you took a step back, eyes falling to the ground as confusion consumed you. Why didn't he put up a fight? Provoke you? Try to win? What was he playing at?
Then . . . it hit you . . . really hit you.
He'd backed down. 
You'd won.
So why'd it feel . . . wrong?
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It still felt wrong as you walked back to the dorms a few hours later, tipsy and alone. Everyone else (besides Jungkook, who was sitting at the bar the last you saw him) had taken off a little bit before you, but you didn't mind. The past few years of learning how to get on your own feet again, solitude had become something of a friend to you. If anything, you preferred the walk back alone. And (you wouldn't admit this to anyone) the weather was just the way you liked it--a little bit of snowfall and just cold enough to where you could shove on a light coat rather than a heavy one. 
So, you let yourself bask in the snowfall, as you plugged in your wired headphones that had a habit of hurting your ears if you wore them too often. You could feel your nose begin to sting the longer you walked down the streets, getting closer and closer to the dormitories. 
That was what led you there . . . 
. . . Just a little ways from the dormitories, there resided a bridge. It sat above (now) frozen-ish water; the small amount of snowfall turning the deadly landscape into something almost beautiful. And you . . . with your bad leg, had to conveniently rest (supposedly the metal screws keeping your bones in place froze up in the cold). Whatever. Point was, whether you wanted to admit it or not, you decided to stop and smell the roses, so to speak.
But no roses were smelt, just the dead of winter. Cold air filled your lungs, and for once in your life, you stepped toward the edge of the bridge, hands just barely touching the chilled railing. Then, you allowed yourself to close your eyes and breathed it in. All of it.
The world was quiet like this. Cold and bitter, but quiet. It was almost peaceful. Almost—
“Don’t do it. You’ve got so much to live for,” you heard a mocking voice from behind you, only vaguely startling you out of your daze. 
But you didn’t jump. There was no need to. Startled or not, there was no need to fear. You knew that voice, and it only ever filled you with dread, nothing else.
So instead of answering, you dropped your head, eyes on the freezing water below you as your hands tightened around the railing. 
Jungkook had found you. Somehow he always managed to make his way back to you, no matter how many times you pushed him away.
(It was annoying. Really.)
His footsteps grew closer. He was behind you now. Close, yet still so very distant.
Silence for only a beat more.
And then, he spoke.
“Is joining the team really that bad?” he questioned, his voice holding a certain mocking tone to it, but it wasn’t as slurred as you had expected. It barely even sounded like he was tipsy. Odd . . .
Still, you pushed those thoughts to the back of your mind and forced yourself to answer, “I’m not going to jump, Jungkook.”
“Could've fooled me.”
“Doesn’t take much to fool you.”
“Ha,” he dryly spat.
You felt a hint of a smile tug at your lips in triumph.
“Head to the dorms.”
You snorted, “Why would I listen to you? I’m older.”
“Hypothermia.”
“Like you care,” you huffed, stuffing your hands in your pockets for warmth. “Bet you’d like to see me as a human popsicle.”
“As amusing as that’d be . . . “ 
But . . . he never finished his sentence. 
In confusion, you glanced his way, finding his eyes weren’t trained on you. There was no devious wink sent your way or cheeky smirk. No, Jungkook stood in silence, brows pinched while his gaze was trained on the freezing water below. 
There was something . . . peculiar in his eyes. Familiarity? Recognition? An odd personification of deja vu? You didn’t know, but you knew that look and it didn’t feel like anything . . . good. It felt like three years of learning how to use your legs again. 
You swallowed hard. It felt like—
But the gentle sound of your name being called, brought you out of the past, and into the present where Jungkook now stood before you, those round (almost deceivingly innocent) brown eyes of his on you.
You raised your brows in question. But no words left your lips.
“Head to the dorms,” he said again, this time, his voice was stern . . . unlike the Jungkook you knew.
And this time . . . you didn’t put up a fight.
No, instead, you sent him a look (one even you couldn’t decipher) before you stepped away from the edge and carried on down the path toward the dormitories. But before you stepped off the bridge entirely, you felt your feet come to a halt just before you glanced over your shoulder, eyes searching for Jungkook.
And there you found him.
Jungkook stood right where you left him. But now . . . now his hands were placed on the railing as he kept his eyes trained on the water below him.
You felt yourself pause. Not just your movements, but you swore your heart flatlined only for a mere second. 
Because you recognized the look Jungkook wore now. 
You’d worn it many times before. 
It was a look without hope—a look you wore when you lost your purpose.
It was the look of nothingness.
But why did it plague the always so self-assured Jungkook?
Your mind only spun from there. It spun and spun and spun, trying to figure out the man who now stood before you. Only, you kept coming up short.
Still, you didn’t move. You came to realize you couldn’t . . . not until he did . . . not until you knew he wasn’t going to . . . not until he . . . until he . . .
And eventually, Jungkook did move.
He moved faster than you, too. Fast enough to catch sight of you still standing there, waiting for him against your will. 
And . . . he almost looked . . . shocked.
You, too, shocked yourself, but quickly recovered. Without another thought, you lowered your head and turned away from him, scurrying off toward the dormitories as you tried to create enough space between you and the boy you’d grown up with. 
But you could still hear him behind you, walking at the same pace even as the two of you made it inside the facility and up the stairs to the dorms. It wasn’t until you reached the girls’ dorm did you pause before the keypad, waiting to hear his footsteps stop before the boys’ dorm.
And only when you heard the first sign of him punching in the passcode, did your thoughts become too much, spilling from your lips. "We're on the same team. We have to be somewhat civil. I know that, but . . . " you trailed off, trying to find your voice. You just . . . you had to know. Nothing was adding up, and you meant nothing. “How could you not go? You were supposed to make it. You were one of the best. I mean you had it. You fucking had it. Why did you end up here instead?"
"I told you.”
Whipping around, you were met with the image of his back, but that didn’t stop you. Your mouth was opening before you could snap it shut. "Bullshit,” you bit out before he could spew out another excuse. "It's bullshit. All of this is."
A beat of silence followed your accusations. It rang in your ears as it wedged its way between the two of you.
Then, he slowly turned around, and it was almost as if this were the first time you’d actually seen him that night. And . . . well . . .
The Jungkook before you appeared to be a stranger. His eyes were droopy and hollowed, a certain eternal tiredness hidden behind his lashes. There was no playful smile. No wink. No smirk. No innuendos or remarks sent your way. There was nothing. 
He looked . . . exhausted.
And then he said the last words you would’ve expected him to ever say. "Because . . . it didn’t matter," he muttered, nearly scoffing as he shook his head. “It doesn’t matter.”
The world stilled. 
It doesn’t matter, rang in your ears. 
How could he think that? 
How could he?
It didn’t matter if the two of you had never gotten along . . . you knew he was talented. You both were. That was the whole fucking point. It was supposed to be you and him neck and neck for the rest of your lives. Then the accident happened and he ended up winning (by default) and now . . . now he stood before you claiming he gave it up because it didn’t matter. 
The world began to burn.
It doesn’t matter, you heard again, and you felt nuclear.
How could he think that? 
How could he?
You would’ve done anything to trade places with him. Anything. 
He was the lucky one, not you. And he’d wasted it all because . . . it didn’t fucking matter? 
How could he?
You squeezed your hands so tight you swore your nails had begun to pierce your skin. But you didn’t care. All you felt was the wildfire you’d become. "You're so selfish," you barked out. "I would give anything to have been you. You got the better end of the stick, Jungkook . . . and you wasted it. Why? Because you're lazy?" 
But Jungkook remained silent. 
Your anger only grew.
"You loved badminton,” you tried again, jaw clenched. “Why didn't you go?"
And finally . . . he met your gaze and shrugged (he fucking shrugged). "I told you. Just didn’t want to,” he breathed out.
Something wet trickled down your cheek then, and only when you went to swat it away did you realize you were crying. Fuck.
Fuck this. 
Fuck your leg. 
Fuck this team. 
Fuck Jungkook. 
Fuck all of it.
"No," you heard yourself say before you felt your lips move; your anger was far too fueled to tame. "I couldn't. I won't even be able to . . . I won’t ever be half the player I was. You . . . you ruined that for me. You ruined my life." You shook your head, still in disbelief. "But you . . . you could have gone."
Jungkook only nodded one, before he spoke, "Welcome aboard, new girl.”
Then . . . he was gone, typing in the passcode and slipping inside the boys’ dorm without another word. And you stood, alone in your solitude with tears of shame staining your cheeks.
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The next day, Jungkook was a no-show, and you had to stop yourself from letting your mind wander. (It didn't work . . . spoiler alert.) But it seemed you weren't the only one whose mind was on his whereabouts. Only, unlike you, everyone else seemed to have an idea where he had run off to . . . 
It happened during the first break of the practice. You had been the first to book it to the bleachers, trying not to show just how desperate you were to get your hands on your water bottle. But, it had been a while since you'd practiced this long. Still . . . you wished you could do better; be better.
But you didn't have time to dwell on your lack of skills when you heard one of the boys on the team whisper to another, "Out with a fever, I heard."
The other guy (who you had yet to learn the name of either) shook his head and scoffed. "Why does Coach believe that bullshit every time? Jeon's hungover and cheating all of us."
"You know why," the first one spoke, his voice bitter. "Special treatment. He's the reason we still have a team."
"It's rigged. That's what it is."
The two went on and on, but you tuned them out, digesting their words as you drank from your water. It just didn't make sense. A lot of things didn't make sense. Why was Jungkook here and not somewhere better, somewhere more competitive, somewhere more him? He'd always been destined for greatness, even you begrudgingly knew that. But he was here. It didn't make sense.
This pays, his voice revised you, but now with a clearer head, you were sure his reasoning was bullshit. On top of the useless, It doesn’t matter, bullshit he’d told you. And the look he'd given you . . . he was hiding something and for some reason, he didn't want you to know. And that . . . that bothered you more than anything.
But perhaps the main thing that stumped you was the fact that everyone was so sure Jungkook had called off due to a hangover . . . only . . . when you saw him last night . . . he didn't look drunk . . . not in the slightest. 
So then, there was one more question that plagued you: why did Jungkook not show?
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Jeon Jungkook had become something of a shadow in the past few weeks you’d been training under Yunis. He barely showed up to practice, and if he did, he was always fifteen minutes late. And when he did, he ended up standing behind you, watching from the bleachers while you were up for a match, or off-handedly passing you a water bottle during breaks. He was always there in the back of your mind like an afterthought. 
And you began to wonder if he was doing this out of pity or guilt.
Because, yeah, he fucked you over years ago, and because of that you ended up like this. But . . . to put it blatantly, you were the worst on the team.
Every hit you attempted was countered. Not once had you made a point on anyone. You could barely even serve. You were just . . . out of practice . . . and god, did it show.
So maybe . . . maybe this wasn’t guilt which plagued him, but pity. That only made your anger grow.
It didn’t help that competitions were coming up. That meant talk of picking a doubles partner was going around, consuming most of the small talk in the locker rooms. And, well, almost everyone had a partner except . . . you. (You weren’t even sure if anyone would want to offer to strike up a deal with you, given your expertise or lack thereof.)
And you were left with no other choice: force yourself to be better.
You had to. You’d never survive on the team if you didn’t.
If that meant staying later to practice by yourself in the dead of night into the early morning, then so be it. You used to be the best. You used to be worth something. There was only one way to regain your worth. 
Sure, you ran the risk of overworking yourself, but you didn’t care. You wanted this more than you wanted anything. 
So what if your leg hurt at the end of the night? You’d put some ice on it and call it a day. The worst had already happened. You couldn’t live in fear of it happening again, not when your career was on the line; when your purpose was right there.
Fortunately, some of your teammates were more generous than others. Hoseok, specifically, had seen you practicing late one evening and offered to help if you were willing. Which, of course, you were hesitant to, not because you didn’t need the help, but rather . . . you were embarrassed by the fact that you did need an extra hand.
Helplessness wasn’t something you were used to feeling. Granted, you’d become used to it over the years, but you’d never asked for help; never asked someone else to assist you in your recovery unless you were forced by your parents.
(So you accepted the deal only if he swore he’d keep it between the two of you. Classy . . . yeah, you knew you were being stubborn.)
Whatever . . . moving on.
The point was: Hoseok had arranged to meet outside the training center at three in the morning that very day. Now, waking up early had never been too perilous for you, so it was no surprise you were waiting outside the doors at exactly four minutes before three, before Hoseok even showed up. (Early bird catches the worm or . . . whatever.)
Only once it hit three, you began to grow impatient, fingers itching to wrap around your racket and hit something. And when it hit one minute past three, you decided heading in early to hit a few birdies while you waited for Hoseok to show up wouldn’t hurt. 
But . . . 
. . . as soon as you pushed open the doors, your eyes landed on the last person you expected to see, and out of shock, your sneakers squeaked on the court as you came to an abrupt halt. The doors slammed behind you a second later, echoing throughout the arena, and alerting him of your presence.
His eyes found yours a second later, brows twitching in confusion as he took in your sudden appearance. But no words left his lips, and you took the opportunity to straighten your posture, eyes narrowed in a glare while you took in his appearance. 
There Jeon Jungkook stood, almost like your shadow, mirroring your stance from across the room. Racket in hand, gripped so tight his knuckles had turned white. Beads of sweat trickled down his face and neck, making his hair appear darker (you didn’t even want to acknowledge how it made his bare abdomen look). He’d been practicing, too, it seemed . . . hence his bare chest on display (which you tried not to make eye contact with, attempting to keep your composure, but memories of what could’ve happened years ago kept seeping in).
But it wasn’t any of that which caught your attention (well not entirely). The glint in his eyes made you visibly falter. It was the same look you’d caught sight of that night at the bridge—hopelessness.
Why did he carry that look even now?
Then, you watched his lips move, but you couldn’t hear what he’d said. Your mind was still reeling, trying to figure out how the arrogant boy you’d grown up with had turned into a hopeless ghost of his old self. And then you started to wonder why it happened.
Only no answers were found . . . 
You just kept staring at him.
And he stared back at you.
Until the sound of your name falling from his lips snapped you out of your daze. Not because it was your name, but rather because of the way he’d said it—soft, gentle, and unlike you’d ever heard it before.
Blinking, you raised your brows and hummed in acknowledgment, gesturing for him to continue.
Jungkook’s brows twitched only for a moment. Once in confusion, another in solemnity. Then, he sighed, and lowered his head, his eyes trained on the floor. "You shouldn't be here," he finally murmured, his voice just loud enough for you to hear from where you stood.
The anger you felt before burned like a wildfire, consuming you whole. "What?” you couldn’t help but scoff. “You own the court now?"
Jungkook furrowed his brows, then shook his head. "No, I didn't mean—I just—" he cut himself off, slapping his hand against his thigh in defeat. "You shouldn't be here." He pointed to the banner of your team’s name.
Oh.
Oh.
You glanced to the side, averting your gaze from him. "And where should I be?" you questioned, trying to put up a front, trying to make your voice sound sturdy and gruff, but failing miserably. You only sounded . . . vulnerable . . . and you had a hard time not hating yourself for that very fact.
But no reply came your way . . . at least . . . not at first.
The silence greeted you first.
Until he finally spoke: “You deserved more than this D-list team.”
At that, your eyes snapped up, only to find he was still staring at the floor, that same damned look on his face. You sucked in a sharp breath, confusion taking hold over you once again as you tried to look beyond the barriers he clung onto and discover the truth. 
What had happened?
Why was he so . . . different?
Why . . . why was he here?
His words revisited you then. This pays. It doesn’t matter. But then you were reminded of the looks he'd given you each time he’d said those words. He was lying. But for what? What was he hiding?
So you tried once more. "Why—” you took a step forward, the squeaking of your sneakers breaking the tension between the two of you— “are you here, Jungkook?"
The silence revisited the two of you once again (it seemed it had taken its claim on you).
Then, he raised his head, that same hopeless look in his eyes, but this time it was paired with a small smirk. "The ambiance," he breathed out as he shrugged at his words.
And you . . . blinked, astonished. There was that look again. Another lie.
But you never had the chance to rebuke his lies as the next second, the doors to the arena creaked open, signaling someone else had entered. And you, in slight shock, glanced over your shoulder to discover Hoseok standing near the entrance, eyes wide with confusion as he took in you and Jungkook standing opposite of each other with the same look on your faces. He, however, didn’t utter a word. Neither did Jungkook, and you wouldn’t dare be the first to speak.
. . .
Jungkook moved first.
He quickly grabbed his shirt from the bleachers and slung it over his shoulder before he made an attempt to head for the doors. You didn’t bother glancing up to watch him, too inside your own head to bother with such things, however, once he passed by you, he paused briefly and you glanced up only just in time to catch his lips as he spoke.
"I didn't mean to ruin things for you,” he murmured, his voice low and quiet so Hoseok wouldn’t overhear. 
And then he was gone, walking out the door and heading off to god knows where. You didn’t mean to watch him leave. Honest, you didn’t, but you couldn’t stop yourself. Your eyes were glued to his back, even sticking to him as you watched his figure grow smaller and smaller. 
You watched until he was truly gone.
Then you blinked, suddenly realizing Hoseok was also in the room. And once your eyes landed on him, you realized your cover had been blown. Hoseok knew something was up between the two of you, and you could tell with one look at his face.
As if he’d heard your thoughts, the next second he remarked, "You're hiding something.”
"What?" you questioned, feigning innocence.
"You're hiding something," he reiterated. "You know Jungkook, don't you?"
You narrowed your eyes at him, trying to prove him wrong. 
But he just kept staring at you with this knowing look, and you knew there was no fooling him.
So . . . you ended up sighing, lowering your head in defeat. And then you admitted it all. "Our moms are friends," you murmured. "He fucked me over a few years ago. Not really something I want to acknowledge."
But what you didn’t expect was to hear Hoseok scoff in response. "So he's made it a habit?"
Now it was your turn for confusion to consume you as you narrowed your brows and tilted your head to the side in questioning. "Made what a habit?" you asked, weariness in your voice.
"You already know he's fucked up, right? So just, steer clear," was all Hoseok said in response.
That was just not enough, you decided as you took a step forward. You weren’t one to back down, and you certainly weren’t going to let this go without knowing the truth. Maybe it would explain his reasoning for being on the team, revealing the truth that he refused to admit to your face.
Hoseok saw this the moment you raised your brow. And he didn’t dare shy away from this.
Finally, he sighed in defeat. "He left his old team a couple months ago after screwing over some kid. When he joined Yunis . . . it caused a big divide within the team. A lot left, a lot stayed. That's why there have been so many new recruits,” he explained, solemnly, "He's a selfish dick. Just . . . I don't know . . . don't let him get under your skin."
Huh.
"What did he do?" you questioned, trying to dig a little deeper.
"Ruined the kid's career. He'll never play again,” Hoseok muttered with a shake of his head. Then . . . came a dark scoff, one with no pity or remorse. "Wanna know the worst part?"
"Mmm."
"They were friends.”
The world stilled, and your anger fizzled out into a flame. You should have been angry. You’d spent years hating him, but now . . . now you wanted to know the truth about what had happened to him in the three years you’d been apart. You wanted the truth more than you craved to let your anger spread, and this was just a taste.
There was something else you didn’t know.
Maybe more than a few things.
And the only way you knew how to discover the truth was to dig . . . deeper.
"What was his name?" you found yourself asking.
"Not sure," Hoseok hummed with a shrug. "Starts with a T I think, but he's basically been wiped out of the badminton world since it happened. You get the gist, right? Kid's a ghost now."
You only nodded, taking in his words.
"Look, just . . . it seems like the two of you aren't on the best of terms—” Hoseok began again— “so I'd hate to see the same thing happen to you."
You nodded once more. "Right. Thanks.”
But your mind was elsewhere.
This was only a bit of the truth. You were sure Jungkook was hiding more, and you craved to get to the bottom of it. Hoseok’s words might have explained why Jungkook ended up here, but none of it even touched on why he wore that familiar glint of hopelessness; why the ghost of nothingness haunted him as it did you.
That was what you were truly after.
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Here was the deal: it wasn’t that you necessarily hated people, but . . . well . . . you preferred to be alone. Solitude had been something of an acquaintance or dare you say, even a friend. It was comforting to wallow in the past, to be wrapped up in the familiarity of who you used to be and who you became after the accident. The pain was numbing. You supposed it’d become so constant, the familiarity of pain had turned into sick comfort. Maybe that was why you craved it even now.
But . . . your career didn’t allow you to lock yourself in your dorm room and hide away from your teammates all season long. You were coworkers in a sense. You worked together, got on the boards together, and ranked your team higher together. That was just the catch: being on a professional team like Yunis, meant dealing with people.
You had to play nice . . . which was something you had never excelled in.
Rough around the edges had always been what you were known for. You were avoided in school, and envied for your skills but never challenged or threatened. That was why Jungkook had always managed to crawl under your skin: because he didn’t care about any of that. He had always taken every chance to test you; to prove he was better. No one ever challenged you except for Jeon Jungkook.
So where was he now?
Something had happened. You were sure of that. He had never been like this. He had never backed down from a challenge. Ever. Now . . . it seemed all he ever did was hide in the shadows, trying to blend in with the dull scenery surrounding him.
If he wanted to be a ghost, then fine . . . but you were going to figure out why.
(Because you never knew how to mind your own business, not because of anything else.)
Maybe that was the only reason you ended up going to the small get-together the team decided to put on in the girls’ dormitory. It was a small thing, just for the team members. A few bottles of wine accompanied by food some of the team members made while one of the girls put on old plays to watch and analyze. It was utterly normal, everyone should have gone. You almost didn’t. But Jungkook . . . he hadn’t shown at all.
So when one of the guys (who you knew as Jungkook’s dorm mate) asked if someone could run back to the boys’ dormitory to grab his speaker for the TV, you uncharacteristically volunteered. You, of course, ignored the odd looks shot your way by Hoseok as you headed out the door. You didn’t care. You were dying for an excuse to leave from the moment they all congregated together. This was just the right opportunity. You know . . . kill two birds with one stone. And as soon as you left, you breathed a sigh of relief once there was a barrier between you and the loud noises coming from inside the girls’ dormitory.
Still slightly overstimulated from the half hour you’d spent around all of them, you leaned against the door a little longer, catching your breath. It wasn’t that you hated people . . . you just didn’t know how to be around them. Part of you supposed that came from you not really knowing how to be a person anymore.
You swallowed hard, eyes snapping to your beat up shoes. They were worn and a little ugly, but a gift from your mother, so you dealt with it. That didn’t trouble you. However, what did was the glimpse of your chewed fingernails you caught sight of out of the corner of your eye. The bitten nails were just more evidence of your dwindling humanity. It was a weakness . . . one you weren’t proud of.
But . . . whatever . . . fuck it all . . . you had a plan and you weren’t going to get sidetracked with your other side problems. None of that mattered right now. What mattered was finding out the truth.
With that thought on your mind, you pushed off the door, striding toward the boys’ dormitory. You wanted the truth and you were going to get it, you decided as you punched in the passcode that Wooshik had given you. You stepped through the threshold a second later, quietly closing the door behind you before you were off, eyes searching for the door number to his room. And when you found it, you faltered for only a second before you brought your fist up and pounded twice on the wooden door.
A beat of silence followed.
Then . . . footsteps.
And the door opened, revealing a disheveled Jungkook.
He appeared taken back, shocked by your sudden appearance (he hadn’t been expecting you, you supposed, and you couldn’t blame him for that). His dark hair sat messily atop his head, twisted and flattened from just waking up, you suspected (his eyes were slightly puffy with sleep). He wore only a baggy black shirt paired with matching black sweatpants . . . and bright yellow socks that looked a little too familiar although you couldn’t quite put your finger on where you’d seen them before.
. . . You’d be lying if you said you didn’t find him attractive, especially with the sleeve of tattoos and new piercing that you weren’t entirely used to yet. But . . . never mind . . . you were getting sidetracked.
You opened your mouth to speak, only he beat you to it. (Of course.)
“To what do I owe the pleasure?” he hummed, clearly amused as he leaned against the threshold of the door.
And you were left utterly confused. Lately, you had no idea if you were going to get this Jungkook or the other. He was just so hot and cold now, and it felt as though you barely knew him. (You weren’t sure why that bothered you so much.)
“I’m only here for Wooshik’s speaker,” you stated firmly, trying to rid yourself of your previous thoughts.
“Well, be my guest. . . “ he trailed off as he stepped aside to allow you inside . . . and you accepted his offer, crossing over the threshold.
The sound of the door shutting behind you only made your nerves skyrocket, not because you felt afraid to be alone with him, but rather you were afraid of what it meant to be alone with him. The last time the two of you were left alone, you almost slept with him. And sure it had been a long time since anyone had touched you properly. And yeah, yeah, he looked really fucking good but . . . well . . . no . . . you couldn’t get sidetracked. You hated the guy for fuck’s sake (even if the thought of his tattooed hand on your body made your heart beat a little faster).
Just because he was attractive didn’t mean you couldn’t hate him . . . OK . . . ?
You were here for one thing and one thing only, no mistakes allowed. So it was no surprise that you whipped around a second later, huffing out a quick, “Fine, I lied. Well . . . kind of.”
Jungkook tilted his head to the side. “You lied?”
You nodded. “I don’t give a fuck about the speaker. I want the truth.”
Straightforward, you remarked, great start. You were on the right track.
Jungkook took a step forward and crossed his muscular arms over his chest. “The truth?”
“Yes.”
“About . . . ?”
“Why you’re here.”
“I told—”
“Fuck off with that shit,” you immediately spat.
And Jungkook . . . cracked a . . . smile. 
“Are you laughing at me?”
“I mean . . . yeah,” he retorted with a shake of his head and a silent chuckle. He took another step forward until he was standing in front of you, towering over you, but the glint in his eyes was far from humorous. “Let me get this straight . . . you ignore me for years and then some, treat me like I’m stupid as soon as you get here, act like you’re in the fuckin’ right when you’re so damn wrong it’s almost laughable . . . and now . . . now you barge into my dorm, demanding I explain why I took a job and for what? So you can make me feel like shit about that too? So you can feel better about the shit life you were dealt?”
“The shit life you caused,” you retorted, knowing full well you were getting under his skin a little too well.
Jungkook’s eyes darkened. “I didn’t do shit to you,” he muttered, his voice stern. “Get off your high horse.”
“You’re the one who walks around this place like he owns it,” you quickly snapped back. “You barely show up to practice, and when you do it’s at, like, what? Three in the morning? Do you know what they say about you? What they think you are? What you’ve done? Hoseok—”
“Don’t listen to a thing Hoseok or any of them says,” he cut you off, shutting you down immediately. “None of them know shit. None of them. Got it?”
“How do you expect me to believe that?”
His brows twitched. “You know me.”
“Do I?” you questioned, swallowing what was left of your dignity. “You’ve . . . changed. You drink way too much, you don’t show up to anything, everybody hates you for some reason, you—you act normal one day, then the next you’re apologizing. And what about the other day? You stood at that bridge for a long time like . . . like you were going to jump or something. You’re . . . you’re obviously hiding something.”
“And you want to know what that is, I assume?”
“Yes.”
He scoffed. “Don’t tell me you care.”
You swallowed hard. Don’t tell me you care. You didn’t. You knew you didn’t. You despised him for what he’d done to you; for what he probably did to someone else; for the person he was and the person he’d become. You did not care about Jeon Jungkook at all. No, you hated him; you blamed him.
“I don’t,” you muttered, meekly.
That got him. “You do, don’t you?” he mused, chuckling under his breath.
You rolled your eyes, refusing to admit to a lie. “My hate for you is visceral, Jungkook. I just want the truth . . . about that night . . . about the party . . . about why you decided ruining my life was worth it only for you to turn up here . . . with me on this, let’s face it, shitty team.”
A beat of silence.
Then . . . 
“Fine.”
You raised a brow. “Fine?”
"You wanna know why I invited you to that party?"
You shrugged. "Already know. I just wanna know if it was worth it.”
Were you testing him or did anger still become you? Truth was: you had no real idea.
"No, no, you don't," Jungkook spat out, shaking his head. "You don't know."
You couldn’t stop the stunned look on your face from forming (you could only wipe it off the second it touched your features). "Fine, humor me then, Jungkook. Why did you invite me?" you questioned, pushing more and more and more. "More pity?"
"No.”
"Then why?” you challenged back, taking a step toward him. You were almost there. The truth was in your reach. “You keep beating around the bush, makes me wonder if—"
"Because I wanted to.”
And you weren’t sure if the world paused or if you’d held your breath for too long. Either way, his words replayed in your head, taking over you, because, well, how could that be the truth? He’d done it to one-up you as he’d done everything back then to be better than you. If this were the truth, then that would mean you had been wrong . . . and that couldn't be. This couldn’t be the truth . . . not after all this time.
So, in disbelief, you heard yourself scoff. "Really? That's the lie you decided to settle on?"
Jungkook shook his head once. Then twice. Then once more before he took a step toward you . . . only he didn’t stop. He kept walking toward you, and you kept backing away from him until you were nearly pressed up against the door. Only then did he stop with a few feet between the two of you. And then . . . then he tilted his head to the side, those brown eyes of his trailing down your body before snapping back up to your confused gaze.
"You know what your problem is?” he questioned, his voice more controlled now. “You don't know when to chill the fuck out. You're always stressed. You were stressed then too, and don't go blaming it on the stupid bet. I know you."
"Really? You know me?" you retorted as you tilted your chin, trying to assert your dominance. "Please, then, enlighten me. Tell me exactly why I was so stressed."
A shrug from Jungkook. "You play best when you're not thinking, you know?" he remarked, the anger that was once in his voice now entirely vanished. There was the Jungkook you knew. "Guess that's the appeal to it, right? It was fun." But the boy you knew dwindled right then. His eyes fell to the floor. "Well . . . used to be."
"What are you getting at?"
His eyes were back on you in an instant. "I've watched your plays," he admitted with no shame. "Recent and before the . . . accident. You do your best when you're not thinking. When you're stressed, when you're tense . . . that's when you mess up."
You let the silence answer for you.
Because . . . he was right. (And you didn’t want to believe him.)
"I invited you because you were stressed,” he reiterated when he realized no answer would come his way. "You don't play well when you're stressed."
But that would mean—
No, you couldn’t have that. He was lying. He had to be. He’d spent his entire life teasing you, trying to one-up you in everything. You’d spent yours trying to beat him, and prove to everyone your name was worth knowing as well. He’d wanted to win the bet back then just as much as you and you both would’ve done anything to get there . . . only he’d gone a little father.
That was it.
It had to be.
"You think I'd buy that bullshit?" you found yourself spitting out, voicing your disbelief. "You invited me because you wanted me to what? Relax? Really? How stupid do you think I am?"
But Jungkook didn’t falter, he only played into your words. "It would be an unfair advantage if you were off your game," he mused, a hint of an obnoxious smirk resting on his pink, plump lips. "Besides . . . I didn't need to sabotage you or whatever you think I did . . . to beat you. I would've won no matter what."
You only shot him a glare.
He shrugged in response. "So, yeah I invited you. So what?"
"Well—”
"And . . . “ he added before you could speak.
"And?"
Except . . . when you glanced into his eyes again, you didn’t find the usual cheeky glint you were accustomed to. No, instead, there was that look again. The look of hopelessness met your gaze.
"And . . . I thought we were friends,” he admitted, clearing his throat immediately afterward. "That's why I invited you."
"Friends?” you couldn’t help but scoff. “You hated me.”
His brows furrowed. "Hated you—where'd you get that from?"
Oh, fuck this. He was not playing stupid. He didn’t get to do that, not after all these years, not after all the time you’d spent trying to be better than him, not after he’d made it his mission to show off every chance he had. He didn’t get to stand there and act as if the feud the two of you had clutched onto growing up had actually all been in your head. Because that wasn’t true, and he didn’t get to feign innocence. Not him. Not now. Not ever.
The sound of your name being whispered brought you out of your own mind, but only made your anger grow. No. He didn’t get to do that either.
All of this was bullshit.
Fuck the speaker. Fuck this team. Fuck him.
You were done.
"Whatever, Jungkook—” you spat, hand reaching for the doorknob. You wanted out and you wanted out now— “I don't have time for this.”
But before you could even attempt to leave, Jungkook shot out his tattooed arm, his hand slamming down on the door, making it impossible for you to run. You expected him to grow angry, just as you had. His actions called for furrowed brows and narrowed eyes, but when you turned your head to meet his gaze, you were only met with a look similar to the one you’d seen him wear on the bridge. This was different, though. It was less hopeless, more . . . hurt. It stopped you in your tracks, nearly taking your breath away entirely.
Then, he spoke, his voice barely above a whisper, "You thought I hated you?"
Was he really going to play dumb? 
You weren’t going to stand there and take it. Not after all this time. Not when you’d lost so much. "You did everything you could to one-up me. If I did something you would be right there going off to do it better. People knew your name. They chanted it. I was always an afterthought . . . and you . . . you thrived off that," you muttered, venom in your voice. "So yeah, you hated me."
What appeared to be realization washed over his features. His hand on the door lifted, now barely touching, but he didn’t move away. No, he only stepped closer . . . so close you could smell his cologne and the mint from his mouthwash on his breath. And you . . . you straightened your back against the door, sticking your chin in the air, challenging him.
Jungkook seemed to catch onto this, eyes flicking down to your lips which were pulled into a frown, then back up to your eyes. Only then did the corners of his mouth twitch up into a cocky grin. "That's what you thought that was?" he asked, his voice silky and oh so deep. “Hmm?”
You could only shrug. "What else would it be?"
"Listen, Birthwort—"
"God—” you cut him off, groaning with the addition of a roll of your eyes— “not that fucking flower again."
He grinned wider at that. "I never hated you," he reiterated . . . and it almost seemed like his words could be true. "I wouldn't have invited you if I hated you." His brows twitched as he paused, something flashing across his features. "You were the only person I felt like was actually a friend. Everyone else was always trying to . . . get something from me."
"Bullshit—” you couldn’t help but scoff— “Taehyung and Jimin."
His grin faltered at your words. There! He was hiding something. He had to be. "Well . . . it's not like any of that means much anymore.”
Your brows twitched in confusion. You wanted the truth. It seemed Jungkook had caught onto this, quickly wiping the solemn expression from his face before he was staring at you fondly once again—a small, accomplished smirk still on his pink lips.
"I admit when I'm at fault," he went on with a shrug. "Winning and being right doesn't feel good when it's wrong." 
You just looked at him, mouth still downturned in a straight line.
"I don't lie—"
A snort from you.
"A lot," he corrected, amused by your input. He shook his head the next second, ridding himself of his previous thoughts. Then . . . he sighed and met your eyes. "Whatever, look, I never hated you, and I would have never done anything to ruin your chances. What happened that day . . . when I heard you scream . . . it was like I could feel my career being ripped away from me, too."
"But it didn't," you quickly bit out. "It was my career, not yours. You were lucky. I lost everything that day."
His brows twitched. "I lost a lot that day, too."
And you couldn’t help but roll your eyes. "Oh, fuck you," you scoffed with a shake of your head. "What'd you lose? A quickie in the back of your car? Bullshit, Jeon, I see right through this act. You're a liar and an asshole. You invited me to get me drunk so I'd be too fucked up to play, because whether you admit it or not, I also know you, and I know for a fact the only thing you care about is winning. Fuck everybody else, right?"
"You're wrong."
"You can't convince me you cared about anything else other than that," you muttered, clenching your hands into fists at your sides. "Not after all this time."
He swallowed, his Adam's apple visible to you. "Well . . . it wasn't like you gave me a chance to explain it to you.”
A shrug from you. "I didn't need you to. I'd been humiliated enough."
He nearly laughed then. "God, you are something else," he settled on saying instead.
You raised a brow. "Me?"
"Yeah, yeah, you," he quipped back. "I invited you to that party because I wanted to. No ulterior motives, no sabotaging, no nothing. I invited you because I wanted you there. Simple as that." He lowered his head, leveling his eyes with yours. "I'm so fucking sorry if the thought of me actually enjoying your company sounds so out there, but it's the truth."
"Then why try to fuck me?"
God, what were you even saying anymore? Truth was: you had no real idea. You were just looking for a fight, the years of bottled up anger becoming too much to bear. And it was true, Jungkook knew you too well. It was no wonder he didn’t seem fazed by any of the stunts you had pulled that night. (You’d be lying if you said it didn’t make your irritation grow more.)
"If I remember correctly it was you—” he tapped a finger to the middle of your forehead— “who came onto me.”
You swatted his hand away while glaring at him. "You were trying to get inside my head," you rationalized. "Right?"
He faltered only slightly, his hand falling to his side. "Is that really what you think of me?"
"It didn't seem that out there back then.”
"And now?"
Silence was your only answer.
It consumed the two of you for one . . . two . . . three seconds before he grew tired of it. Jungkook leveled his eyes with yours once again, nearly burning you with his gaze. And you watched out of the corner of your eye as his hand twitched almost as if he were thinking about touching you, only his hand never met your skin. He’d stopped himself. (And you weren’t sure if it was disappointment you felt or disgust.)
Still, he couldn’t stop his mouth from speaking for him. That much was evident as he confessed, "Trust me when I say badminton was the last thing on my mind when you pulled me into that bathroom.”
And for a mere second, you had begun to believe him.
The look in his eyes . . . the sound of his voice . . . the memories you both shared . . . well . . . it was enough to almost convince you. But accepting this truth, accepting his words meant admitting you were wrong. And if you had been wrong . . . then it would have been your fault solely. You’d ruined your life all on your own . . . and you weren’t sure if you could handle that. (Or if you ever could.)
So, when you spoke again, it was with clouded thoughts, "You're such a—"
"Liar?"
You remained silent. The world . . . no . . . your world was crumbling all around you and you had no idea how to pick up the pieces without getting hit in the process. 
Fear revisited you then. 
God, awful, awful fear. 
It was paralyzing.
"You felt it didn't you?" he questioned again after a moment’s silence.
You swallowed hard, trying to remain composed. "Felt what?"
He only raised his brow in response. Then . . . his eyes flicked down to his sweatpants for only a second, and you knew exactly what he meant.
You swallowed harder this time for an entirely . . . different . . . reason. "Yes.”
"How do you explain that then?"
"Viagra.”
Jungkook laughed, shaking his head at your response. "Is it really that hard to believe that I wanted to fuck you?"
"Yes.”
"Why?"
"Because we were pretending," you answered, your voice meek and unlike you. It held an ounce of vulnerability you weren’t used to. "It was fake. It wasn't real."
"OK, fine, I'll humor the idea," he hummed, no hesitance in his voice. "Believe what you want. But . . . do me a favor . . . answer me a few questions."
Fine. You’d play along.
"Spit it out quick, Jeon.”
He grinned in response. Challenge accepted, it seemed to say. "Is there anyone around?"
"No."
"Any reason to be your fake boyfriend as you called it?"
"No."
"So do I have any reason to lie?"
"Guess not.”
"Right, so then—” his face was mere inches from yours— “believe me when I say I've wanted to fuck you ever since I saw you again at the bar. And right now? All I want to do is fuck you against this wall."
Your breath hitched. "You hate me," was all you could say.
That only amused him more as he leaned in even closer (if that were possible), his breath fanning your burning cheeks. "I'm not sure that's the word, Ambrosia. Try again," he hummed, his voice deep and silky.
"It's the only word I feel," you forced yourself to bite out. 
"So that means I have to feel it as well?"
"It's mutual.”
Jungkook looked at you then. Really looked at you, then . . . there was that half-grin again. "Who knew you'd turn into such a liar," he remarked, softly (almost too soft . . . almost gentle). "I don't hate you. You know that. And I know you don't hate me either."
"Fine—” you huffed, stubbornly— “what word would you use?"
He only shrugged. "I haven't been able to find one.”
"Find one.”
"Feisty.”
You tutted. "Try again.”
His eyes found yours first. Then your lips. Then back to your eyes as if he were truly trying to memorize your features, before he released a heavy breath and gave you a tight-lipped smile. Then, he finally did lift his hand, but only to wrap a lock of your hair around his finger. It was a simple touch, one that didn’t even make skin contact—a touch without touching, if you will. And finally, his lips parted, his words meeting your ears, "Something in me . . . craves you.”
Something in me craves you, repeated in your head like a mantra. Why did this feel true? Why this? Why now? Why him?
His words . . . weakened you. (Something you would never admit to anyone.) But . . . for the first time in a long time, you felt truly desired . . . wanted. It made you feel . . . different.
The thing was: in the past, the people you’d hooked up with had never truly wanted you. Or at least, you’d never felt like they had. It’d always been quick . . . meaningless. You’d always left in the morning feeling used. You remembered feeling that way the morning after the almost hook up with Jungkook years ago, but . . . why did it feel different now? Why did it feel like he’d meant his words?
Did he truly want you? Or was he just lying like all the others before?
Not knowing what he was truly thinking made your mind unravel. You wanted the truth. You wanted to know his every thought. You were tired of being lied to, tired of being used, tired of not knowing. Maybe the truth you were looking for all along had nothing to do with the accident or why Jungkook had ended up here, but rather if he’d truly wanted you back then as you knew you’d wanted him. (Because that was what got to you the most: wanting someone more than they wanted you (and if you were being honest, you’d always been the one to want more).)
But you didn’t say these questions aloud. No, you knew yourself better than that. Admitting these thoughts meant admitting weakness. And you weren’t weak. You couldn’t have anyone see you like this . . . especially him.
It came as no surprise to you when you spat out, "I'm guessing that's your cock?" You always knew it’d go this way. "Dick for brains, Jeon?"
Jungkook only smiled a knowing smile. "Guess so," he hummed, pleasantly. Then, he was letting go of your hair, severing the tie between the two of you. "Have a good night, Belladonna. Don't let the bedbugs bite. They aren't as . . . generous as I am." And with a wink, he’d pushed off the door, leaving you there as he approached his desk. 
That was his goodbye. His way of telling you he surrendered. He wasn’t going to fight. Not anymore. And that bothered you in ways you had never felt before. You weren’t even sure why. It just . . . got under your skin.
You hated him for fuck’s sake. Why was this so hard? Why did you feel like you’d lost?
It wasn’t fair.
You were supposed to hate him. It was only natural . . . only . . . the longer he spent explaining himself, the longer you began to question if the past you remembered was actually the truth, the longer that funny feeling in your lower stomach began to blossom . . . the more you began to doubt yourself.
Did you truly hate him? You were sure a part of you did. It had been ingrained into you since you were young.
But . . . 
You could’ve ignored him. You could’ve not volunteered to grab the speaker. You could’ve quit and begged another team to take you. You could have done a lot of things.
Maybe a part of you did hate him . . . but maybe another part . . . a part that you had long buried . . . craved him, too. He was familiar. He reminded you of the past. He . . . was him.
Now . . . you had no idea what that meant, but . . . you didn’t bother leaving. No, you stayed even though you could’ve left. You stayed because . . . a part of you did, in fact, crave him . . . perhaps even . . . need him.
You didn’t know what that meant. You weren’t sure if you wanted to know.
The only thing you knew for certain was in that very moment . . . you craved him in a visceral way. Your lips, your body, you . . . you wanted him. You wanted to feel him. Touch him. Just once. Just so you could feel something one last time. You weren’t sure when the next time someone would want you like this would be . . . and you weren’t sure when the next time you’d want someone like this would be either.
So for the second time in your life, you said fuck it, and went after him. 
Without thinking, you pushed off the door, taking two strides before your hand wrapped around his bicep, nails digging into his skin as you attempted to turn him around. You wanted him. Craved him, and you knew this now even if you had no idea what it meant. 
Jungkook, taken off guard, faced you, wincing. "Ouch, your nails are sharp," he hissed, rubbing his bicep where your nails had punctured.
"Just shut up.”
"I mean I don't mind marks, but usually I prefer them on my back, sweetheart," he remarked, quickly, still rubbing his arm.
You rolled your eyes, growing fed up. "Shut up.”
"So easily angered," he chuckled to himself as he flicked your chin. "You know, you should really get that checked out."
That was the last straw. "I said shut up," you spat out before you slung an arm around his neck and pulled him into you, quickly connecting your lips. He stumbled into you, remaining frozen in shock as you kissed him once more, asking for him to kiss you back.
And that was all it took. Jungkook exhaled through his nose, sighing into your kiss as his body relaxed and he melded his body against yours. His hands came around you, securing around your waist as he walked the two of you toward his bed. And his kiss. His kiss was like lighting a fire deep inside you that had been put out years ago. 
He only deepened it from there, sucking your bottom lip into his mouth, asking you for permission first. And you willingly gave it to him, parting your lips just enough to allow him access, and relishing in the way he wasted no time. Only instead of slotting your tongues together like you expected, his desire ran deeper and more intense. He didn’t bother beating around the bush. No, instead, he wrapped his lips around your tongue, sucking the muscle like he couldn’t get enough of you. And if that wasn’t enough, once he’d gotten a taste of you, a soft, deep noise sounded from the back of his throat.
It was sloppy and carnal . . . just the way you craved it to be. You only spurred him on from there. You touched your hand to his, securing your fingers around his wrist as you brought his hand under your shirt, helping him push your bra down so he could gain access to your bare skin. He only grew more needy from there, quickly palming your breast before his thumb found your hardened nipple. He pinched and rolled, listening closely to your reactions in order to please you, while swallowing your each and every moan, responding occasionally with his own.
“You still taste sweet,” he remarked against your lips as he nibbled on your bottom lip before pressing a kiss against them. “And you wonder why I crave you? It’s just not fair, sweetheart.”
You didn’t respond. You only tangled your fingers in his dark hair and tugged him closer, pressing your lips against his once again. You didn’t want to talk. Talking meant thinking, and for once you didn’t want to think, you just wanted to feel.
It didn’t take long for Jungkook to take control again either. He reacted quickly to your actions, his hands securing tightening around you as his left drifted down to your ass, squeezing. He walked the two of you further toward his bed until the edge of the mattress met the backs of your knees. He wasted no time, helping you tear off your shoes and crawl onto the mattress before laying you down on your back, making sure your head was resting on one of the pillows while he loomed over you.
Then, with one final kiss, he pulled back, and you watched with careful eyes. His hands found the hem of his shirt, pulling it over his head and discarding it to the floor, revealing the rest of his tattoos to you. And you didn’t hold back, finally allowing yourself to trace the intricate details. Part of you wanted to ask how in the world they let him get all of these with the contracts you all had to sign, but another part of you just wanted to enjoy the warmth of his skin under your cold fingertips. 
Once you’d had your fill, you allowed yourself to meet his gaze, only to find him fondly looking down at you, a hint of smirk on his face. Normally you would’ve rolled your eyes, but this was different. This time . . . you were going into this knowing you were making a mistake, only you couldn’t bring yourself to care . . . not when he looked at you like that.
Instead, you did the only thing you could think of. You evened the score, taking off your shirt and discarding it on the floor. Then, with your eyes never leaving his, you unclipped your bra, slowly revealing your bare chest to him before you discarded it on the floor as well.
And Jungkook couldn’t help himself. His eyes drifted down to your chest, darkening at the sight of you, and then his hands were on you. But his touch wasn’t rushed. It was soft and slow as his fingertips glided across your skin, tracing your curves. 
You sucked in a sharp breath when his fingertips brushed over your nipples. He, of course, found this amusing, smirking slightly to himself, but he didn’t stop to tease you. No, he kept his touch moving, slowly making his way to your clavicle, tracing your collarbones, then the slope of your neck, and finally halting at the corner of your lips. There, he traced the outline of your now puffy lips, sighing in content.
And then . . . then, he murmured, "Deadly nightshade indeed.”
"What the fuck are you talking about, Jeon?" you muttered out, but there was amusement in your voice. (Amusement you hadn’t felt in a while.)
Jungkook only grinned wider. "You not know your flowers or somethin'?"
"No, I was talking about the indeed bit," you tutted with a raise of your brow. "What are you?"
"Well educated.”
"More like insufferable.”
"Don't think that's the right insult," he quipped back as he leaned forward, arms on either side of your head, caging you in. "I'd accept illiterate, but insufferable?” He dipped his head into the crook of your neck, leaving wet, open-mouthed kisses on your skin. “Baby, you've pained me."
Your hands wrapped around his biceps, running up and down his muscles, trying to feel as much of him as you could. But you wanted more, more, more. "Just fuck me before I come to my senses," you found yourself practically begging as you tilted your head to the side, allowing him more access to your neck while you left open-mouthed kisses on his bicep.
“Yes, ma’am,” he hummed against your neck, quickly leaning on one of his arms so he could reach down and latch onto your thigh, guiding you to wrap your legs around his waist. 
And you did as you were told, because you wanted him more than you wanted to win.
His lips brushed against the shell of your ear, and you nearly sighed at the way his breath tickled your skin. "In case you need another reminder—" he whispered, still squeezing your thigh. Then he did something you weren’t expecting. He rolled his hips into yours, and that was when you felt it: his hardened length dragging against your clothed center— "I really want to fuck you."
His torment didn’t stop there as he continued grinding against you and stimulating your aching clit while he softly moaned into your neck and left sloppy kisses on your skin. And you weren't sure if he could tell exactly what he was doing to you or rather just how much his simple touches were making your underwear stick to your core, but it didn't matter, you were already so lost in the taste, the feel, the touch of him. You wanted more, more, more. You wanted to feel him . . . everywhere.
So you did the one thing you knew would get to him. You tangled your hand in his hair, pulling hard while you whined, silently begging him to fuck you. And he did something you weren’t expecting. Instead of giving in to your demands, he tangled his hand into your hair and tugged, exposing your neck more to him before he leaned so close his lips were pressed up against your ear while his body caged you against him.
Then . . . then he practically growled out, "Don't challenge me right now.”
And you couldn't help it, your mind just kept repeating what he'd said, your body heating up even more. Your core throbbed with a visceral ache, and against your will, a soft, barely audible whimper sounded from the back of your throat. 
. . . 
You felt him grin against your ear. Cocky bastard.
"Thought you liked a challenge?" you ended up muttering, completely breathless as you tried to salvage your dignity.
"Not when it prevents me from getting what I really want.”
At his words, you twisted in his hold, and he allowed you to turn your head just so you could be face to face with him, your noses brushing. You watched carefully as his eyes trained on your before dipping to your lips. That was when you spoke, "And what's that?"
And his eyes stayed on your lips, watching the words tumble from your tongue. But he didn’t reply, and he didn’t need to. You both knew the answer.
Jungkook, however, kept surprising you. One second he was looking at you like he’d ravage you, then the next he was pressing a soft kiss to the corner of your lips before he made his descent down your body, leaving kisses on your skin.
"I remember you liking this," he mumbled against your skin, and before you could question what he meant, his thumb rolled against your hardened nipple. You jerked against him, the pleasure going straight to your core. “Still so sensitive.” He kept rubbing small, firm circles against your perked buds, and you kept softly moaning, shifting against him.
As if that wasn’t enough, you were losing yourself in the touch of his fingers, then the next, his tongue smoothed over the bud, and you couldn’t hold back the whimper which escaped you. He didn’t stop there either. He softly hummed against your skin as he kissed your nipple just moments before taking it into his mouth, swirling his tongue around the bud and sucking hard. And you couldn't help it, you jerked once more, but this time you threw your head back, a loud moan sounding from the back of your throat.
His hand was covering your mouth the next second before he released your abused nipple with a pop. “Quiet, baby, don’t want the others to start wondering where you are and hear you, do you?” he hummed against your skin, his thumb taking the place of his mouth as he pleasured you with one hand and muffled your moans with the other. He chuckled when you twitched against him and held onto his hand covering your mouth, trying to hold onto your sanity. “Unless you like being heard. Huh? You want everyone on this team to know you're my little slut?”
You shook your head, holding on to your stubborn attitude. Maybe you wanted to test him. Or maybe you wanted him to punish you.
“No? Hmm. Guess we’ll have to change that, huh?” he remarked, his cockiness showing all too well. 
But you couldn’t find it in yourself to care about anything other than him and his touch. It was especially hard when he whispered for you to keep quiet just before he sank lower down your body, his body now between your legs, and you felt your core clench at what this position entailed.
"This OK?" he questioned as his fingers curled under the hem of your sweatpants.
Holding your breath, you could only nod.
And Jungkook grinned right back at you.
That was all it took before Jungkook pulled your sweatpants down your legs, tugging your underwear down in the process and leaving you bare to his eyes. His eyes stayed trained on your dripping core even as he discarded the rest of your clothes on the ground. Only after he had nestled himself between your legs, hoisting your thighs onto his shoulders did he blow cold air across your aching cunt in an attempt to either soothe the ache or torture you (you were betting on the latter).
That was when you found your voice. "Thought you wanted to fuck me," you muttered out, hoarsely.
Jungkook only grinned wider before he gently bit your inner thigh, then soothed it with his tongue. "There's a lot of things I want to do to you," he admitted as he brushed his lips across your skin. "Fucking's at the end of the finish line."
And you couldn’t help it. You slapped your hands over your face, quietly laughing. "Don't make me laugh when I hate you," you groaned, still hiding your expression from his view.
You, however, weren’t kept hiding your expression for long as Jungkook breathed more cold air over your pulsing cunt once again. Then, you felt him move closer, so close you knew one more inch and he’d be buried between your legs. You swallowed hard, awaiting it all.
"Not sure if you deserve this," Jungkook murmured, teasing you. "What do you think?"
"No," you answered, honestly.
That earned you a soft laugh from him. "Good thing honesty trumps everything else.”
"In your books?"
"Of course.”
When you finally peeked out from the cover of your hands, you were met with his signature grin followed by a wink. That was the only warning you received before he shocked you once more that night. Instead of dipping his tongue into your center like you expected, he buried his face between your thighs, coaxing a gasp out of you. He kissed your center, his nose brushing your clit as you heard him audibly breathe in your scent, followed by a guttural groan. 
You’d never been with someone who enjoyed the scent of your arousal so much . . . and surprisingly, it made you crave him more. It made your cunt throb, your wetness beginning to leak out of you and spread to the sheet. But Jungkook didn’t seem to care. No, he seemed to get off on it as he tightened his grip around your thighs, pulling you closer into him as he breathed in your scent once again, moaning in euphoric pleasure.
“You smell so fucking good,” he nearly whined as he kissed your center once again.
Only then did you realize he had been palming himself through his sweatpants. God, was he really that turned on just by the smell of you? You swallowed hard, and couldn’t deny the way you pulsed at this lewd confession.
Then . . . his mouth was on your core in an instant. All thoughts vanished from your brain as you felt his hot tongue lick a strip up your slit, dipping into your warm heat briefly before his mouth closed around your clit, sucking the nub. You were left a panting mess, rolling your hips against his skilled tongue as he continued his punishing torment, lapping and sucking at the sensitive bundle of nerves, simultaneously making you forget every thought until all you could think was fuck, fuck, fuck.
"Oh, god," you whimpered, trying to keep your noises quiet, but you couldn’t under the relentless torment of his skilled tongue. All you could do was twitch underneath his touch, reaching out to tangle your fingers through his dark hair. And every time you’d twitch, you’d accidentally pull on those dark locks, which only spurred him on further as deep groans sounded from him the harder you pulled.
Losing yourself in the feeling, the rhythm of your hips snapping against his skilled tongue was enough to coax continuous soft moans from your puffy lips. And the longer he laid there, sucking and moaning against your throbbing core, the more impatient he grew. He wanted you to cum. He wanted to feel it, taste it . . . that much was evident. 
You knew you were close too, but as soon as he slipped two fingers into your heat, curling inside of you right where your sweet spot lay, you knew you were a goner. You cried out, core clenching around him as he sucked on your clit while his fingers pumped in and out of you at a punishing pace.
"I can feel you. Fuck, I can feel you squeezing me," he hummed, his voice controlled but holding a certain neediness. "I got you. I got you. Give it to me."
"Kookie, please," you whined, thrashing against him as you felt the coil in your lower stomach quickly build and build. Your release was right there. You could practically taste it.
"Give it to me," Jungkook all but begged, curling his fingers at just the right pace. "Please, god, please cum for me."
Cum for me, he'd pleaded, and you listened. His fingers stroked your sweet spot, his mouth sucking on your swollen clit as the coil snapped, causing you to cry out. Your muscles tightened, your core pulsing as your high broke through every part of your body, your head tilting back in ecstasy, your hips raising while low moans strung from your lips. He helped you ride out your high, too, gently sucking on your clit and softly moaning along with you. 
He released your pussy from his mouth, leaning back to watch you clench and unclench around his fingers with his eyes fully blown out. Blowing air out through his nose, he slid his fingers out of your hole, watching carefully as a string of your arousal still connected his finger to your core. He spread this wetness around your puffy lower lips, soothing the pulsing aftershocks of your orgasm. And when you twitched from oversensitivity, that half-grin on his face appeared once again before he brought his arousal-coated fingers to his lips and slid them into his mouth, sucking all the wetness from his digits.
Through lidded eyes, you watched as he sucked his fingers clean, gaze still on your core before he finally glanced up to take in the state of your face. You were sure you looked like an utter mess, but he didn’t seem to mind as he offered a small, dazed smile before he leaned forward and pressed his lips firmly against yours.
It didn’t take long before he was nipping and sucking at your lower lip, asking you to open up to him. And you were putty in his hands, willingly parting your lips just enough for him to slot your tongues together. Even then, you couldn’t help it . . . you moaned at the carnal act.
He chuckled against your lips, shaking his head slightly. "Thanks for the new spank-bank material," he murmured before making his descent to your neck, leaving kisses along the column.
“I’m surprised you know where the clit is,” you remarked back, too spent to put any real bite in your words.
“Babe—” another kiss to your neck— “you doubt me too much.”
“What? You love pussy that much?”
“Mmm, yours,” he mused, smiling against your skin.
Which . . . you were lucky his face was buried into the crook of your neck as his response had managed to bring a small smile to your face. (You quickly wiped it off before it made you too nauseated.) Then, you mumbled out a pathetic little, “Fuck off.”
And Jungkook only laughed, continuing his torment on your neck. (Not that you were complaining.)
You swallowed hard. If he kept doing that you weren’t going to survive without begging him to either fuck you or eat you out like that again. No . . . you wanted him to have a little taste of his own medicine. So you asked the only thing you could really think of: “Can I suck you off?”
To which Jungkook clicked his tongue. “I don’t normally do this, but . . . if I don’t fuck you soon, I think I may die,” he admitted before your mind could form another reason for his hesitance. He kissed you just under your ear as if to tell you to stop thinking so much. “Rain check?”
Shaking yourself out of that mindset, you resorted to huffing out, "You that easy?"
Jungkook didn’t like that. He quickly had his hands on you again, now resting at your waist, his thumb drawing circles into your hip. “Need I remind you again?" he began, his voice deep, calm, and arousing. "I want to fuck you. Hard. Soft. Rough. Slow. Don't care. Just wanna be inside you. Wanna feel you cum around me." His hand inched down to squeeze your bare ass cheek. "You're just . . . so warm . . . soft. I'd take anything you give me."
"Slut.”
"Believe that's you, sweetheart.”
"Maybe," you hummed, feeling a little more bold, and wanting to put him in his place. He’d spent long enough making you surrender to him. It was time he surrendered to you. 
With that thought on your mind, you trailed your hand down his chest, relishing in how warm he was to the touch. Then, without warning, you snuck your hand into his sweatpants, finding he wasn’t wearing any boxers, and greedily wrapping your hand around his painfully hard cock. You felt him still under your touch, and you waited one, two, three seconds before he groaned into your neck, silently begging you to continue, before you began to explore.
Much like all those years ago, his cock was still just as warm and firm to the touch. And just like back then, it was still intimidating . . . daunting . . . mouthwatering, if you really had to admit it. Shamelessly? You wanted it all.
When your thumb brushed over the head of his cock, he softly moaned into your neck, and you couldn’t take it anymore. Your cunt throbbed with the desire to be filled. You wanted him. All of him. And you needed it now.
“Koo, I’m dying here,” you whined, as your hand tangled in his dark hair while your other worked against his straining cock.
Jungkook only chuckled against your neck before he slowly raised his head to meet your eyes. "Not sure if you're open enough yet," he mused while his hand drifted down your body until it dipped between your legs, his fingers now lazily pumping your pulsing core. 
"Don't care. I like the burn," you all but begged, withering against his hard chest. "Fuck me, Jungkook. Fuck me."
His nose brushed against yours. "You really are a slut.”
When his fingers curled against your already sensitive g-spot, you keened and gasped out, "Just for you.”
"Yeah?" he remarked, cockily. "You my slut?" But his voice fell upon deaf ears as you lost yourself in the feeling of his fingers. Only when you heard the crinkling of a condom wrapper being opened did you realize his warmth had gone and your hand had fallen from his length just long enough for him to grab protection.
"I won't beg," you reiterated as you watched him slide his fingers out of you so he could pull down his sweatpants and throw them across the room. "Fuck me."
His eyes met yours then, and he raised his brow, questioning you or maybe teasing. Either way, he kept his eyes on you as he gave his leaking cock a few pumps before he slid the condom on and sent a wink your way. "I'll get you to beg one day," he said, voice so self-assured, just moments before he crawled back over you, caging you in with his body. 
"Koo . . . “
“Right here with you,” he hummed as he leaned down to press a single kiss to the corner of your mouth. His eyes never left your face even as you felt the tip of his cock line up with your entrance. It seemed he wanted to watch you as he sunk into you inch by inch, and you had a hard time not clenching at the thought. 
And then . . . you felt him slowly enter you, inch by inch sinking into your cunt. Your eyes fluttered closed as your mouth parted and your head tilted back while you basked in the fullness which came along with his cock sliding snugly against your tight walls. Your breath hitched in your throat just as you felt him bottom out, your core taking him all the way until the hilt.
The next second, you were wrapping your legs around him, locking them together in an attempt to get him even deeper. Your eyes fluttered open next, meeting his gaze instantly as he stared down at you with his brows pinched in pleasure and those big, round eyes of his blown out in pure lust. He looked almost pretty like this. Maybe a little too pretty for you to handle.
It didn’t help when the following words out of his mouth were: "You're so fucking tight.”
Embarrassingly enough, you clenched at the lewd confession, making him only groan more. "Ever think maybe you're the problem?" you asked as you brought your hand up to tug on those dark locks of his. You watched in awe as his eyes fluttered closed ever so slightly followed by another soft, deep groan from the back of his throat . . . and . . . you could have sworn his cock twitched inside of you, but you couldn’t be certain.
He, however, recovered fast. "Nah, I know you are," he remarked, his eyes still closed. "You've been my problem for twenty-five years. Pain in my ass for most of my life, and now . . . now you're squeezing me so hard I think I might cum."
You swallowed hard. Fuck, why was that hot? "That would be embarrassing," you said instead of voicing your true thoughts . . . because you couldn’t have him knowing that.
However, you couldn’t stop the way your body reacted to his confession. And he felt it all, wincing under your hold.
His thumb was at your lips in an instant, sliding into your warm mouth and you swore you could taste the residue of your arousal on his skin. "Suck," he commanded, pressing his thumb against your tongue, and you obeyed.
He pulled his thumb out of your mouth with a pop before he placed it on your clit, beginning to rub firm, calculated circles against the abused bud. You couldn’t help but twitch under his touch, already suffering from overstimulation, now with the addition of his thick cock nestled inside of you, you weren’t sure how long you’d last.
“Kook.”
"Relax, baby," he shushed you, continuing to stimulate your clit as he began to slowly drag his cock against your tight, plush walls. "Relax."
You bit your bottom lip, turning your head to the side as your breathing became more uneven by the second. The pressure in your lower stomach was becoming too much as it bloomed and bloomed, twisting and turning in a pleasurable ache. Only then, when you felt as though you could barely swallow your own spit anymore, did you meet his gaze. You, of course, found him staring down at you, a hint of a smirk on his face with this . . . look in his eyes that you couldn’t quite place, but it managed to get under your skin nevertheless.
"Stop looking at me like that," you rasped out, trying to swallow your spit.
Jungkook raised a brow. "Like what?"
"Like I work at a brothel.”
He snorted, moving the hand that was on your clit up to your perky nipples, stimulating them now. "Can't help it," he mused as he pinched one of your nipples between his fingers. "Wish I could've gotten a picture of that face you made. I'm afraid my memory won't do it justice later."
You attempted to roll your eyes. "I don't have the energy to argue.”
"Good. I'm tired of arguing," he replied, pinching your nipple just a little bit harder. (Hard enough to coax a mangled gasp out of you, which no doubt was his plan.) "How do you feel?"
"Good,” you found your voice (ignoring how hoarse it was). “Better if you moved."
He only shook his head, but you caught on to the grin he wore. "Insatiable.”
You couldn’t help but grin back (and this time you hadn’t even realized you’d done it). "Guilty.”
And then he was kissing you again, taking you by utter surprise. You were used to quick fucks, not this. Nothing about sex had ever been . . . soft like this kiss. As if to make it worse, his hand brushed through your hair as he kissed you, tracing your hairline, your cheek, your jaw, then your neck as if he were trying to map out your features. Only then did you realize this was probably a one time thing. You wouldn’t let him get this close ever again. You just needed to get him out of your system and this was the only way how . . . you were sure of that. And . . . and he definitely thought the same.
So why was his kiss so soft?
There was no time for dwelling on your heavy thoughts as he pulled back a second later, asking you, "Ready?"
And all you could say was, "Yes.”
Then . . . the dance began. Jungkook pulled out so just the tip was sheathed inside you, and then he sunk in, groaning as you clenched around him. He started out slow, rolling his hips against yours, making sure to listen to your whimpers and gasps. Then, when he was sure you had become accustomed to his length, he pressed his thumb against your clit, rubbing firm circles against the sensitive bud, and you couldn’t stop the noises which fell from your lips.
Only then, when he had you clenching around him so tight you swore it was almost too tight for him to move, did he pick up his pace. And it wasn’t forgiving. No, he snapped his hips, plunging into you with such force, the tip of his cock nearly kissed your cervix. And he didn’t stop there, he continued pounding into you. Through uneven breaths, you clung onto him, your hands securing around his broad muscular back as his cock sunk deeper and deeper, hitting places you’d never even felt before.
If you were overthinking before, this was the cure. You felt as though your brain was melting after each and every plunge of his cock into your heat. The wet squelching sounds accompanied by his low grunts in your ear was enough to consume you, and you suddenly didn’t care if anyone heard the two of you as you bit into his shoulder, letting yourself become a whining mess.
“Wish I could die in this pussy,” Jungkook hissed as his mouth hung slightly open, rich moans sounding from the back of his throat.
“Yeah?”
“Fuck, yeah.”
You felt yourself unravel a little further. God, did he have an effect on you. Jungkook seemed to only thrive off your unraveling, keeping his ruthless pace as that skillful thumb tweaked against your clit. And that was when you felt it: the familiar coil building and building in your lower stomach. Only this time, it felt different—the pressure was deeper, more intense . . . like you couldn’t control it.
“Kookie.”
“Yeah, baby? You there?”
“Feels different,” you whined, twitching against him.
He only grinned. “Give it to me,” he hummed, dipping his head down to suck your nipple into his mouth. “It’s good different.” He groaned around your nipple. “Trust me. Give it to me.”
And you allowed yourself to trust him.
Everything pulsed as he kept his relentless pace, hitting your sweet spot over and over again as his thumb worked skillfully against your swollen clit while you chased the coil. It tightened and tightened, rings of pleasure hissing in your ears. His thumb quickened its pace, and then the coil snapped, your release sprinkling out of you as this deep pleasure consumed your being in waves. All you could do was surrender to it, tilting your head back into the pillow as your hips raised while your nails dragged down his back, surely drawing blood. All the while, Jungkook continued pounding into you, dragging out your orgasm for as long as he could.
As you slowly came down from your high, he was already on you again, moaning into your neck as his pace only quickened. "You're so fucking hot. Squirting like that for me. Fucking sexy," he spewed out nonsense. "Wanna fuck these fucking tits one day.” His hand squeezed one of your breasts, and you whimpered. “Goddamn."
You let yourself get wrapped up in him for a little longer, too. Your hands were on him again as you tangled your fingers in his hair and pulled. This time a loud, deep groan came from his lips, and you knew you had him. He gave another groan of submission when you tugged again, his thrusts barely cohesive now. He was close, and you reveled in this, wishing to bring him to ecstasy. With that thought on your mind, you devilishly reached over his muscular ass, fingers quickly finding his perineum and pressing into it, massaging the sensitive spot.
And he lost it.
Jungkook nearly collapsed on top of you with another low moan as his orgasm consumed him and he filled the condom with his cum. He gave a few smaller thrusts, still moaning silently before he licked his lips, swallowed, and slowly pulled out, causing the both of you to hiss in sensitivity.
Then . . . his heat was gone as he silently stood to toss away the soiled condom. Only then were you reminded what this was—just a hookup. He didn’t mean anything to you, and you didn’t mean anything to him. The two of you just needed to get this out of your system . . . and now you had, so you could have left.
You should have.
But you stayed glued to his bed, watching him tug his sweatpants back over his lower half, covering him. You took note of the scratch marks on his back, feeling a sense of pride wash over you. Perhaps, you, too, were one for claiming trophies for your accomplishments. Then, he was gone, taking a peek out into the hallway before he disappeared, leaving you with a sense of . . . well . . . you couldn’t quite place it. 
Shame? 
Guilt? 
Disappointment? 
You didn’t know, but you hated the way it made you feel.
But just as you were hastily trying to fasten your bra back on, the door to his dorm room opened, revealing none other than Jungkook holding a washcloth and ibuprofen. You could only stare at him in shock, and he stared back at you, taking in the fact that you were about to book it before he even returned.
You, however, didn’t race past him. You didn’t make a run for it. Not this time. No, this time you let him approach you. You dropped your bra and let him hand you the wet washcloth along with the pain medication while he mentioned something about having water bottles under his bed. Then you watched as he approached his dresser, grabbing one of his tees and boxers. He turned around and handed those to you, too, which you couldn’t wrap your head around.
Why was he being so . . . kind?
He turned around the next second, allowing you to use the washcloth to wipe your thighs from your wetness before you threw on the clothes he’d given you without a second thought. You should’ve left. You should’ve, but something told you to stay, and for once . . . you listened.
You cleared your throat when you were done, and he wasted no time, grabbing the washcloth from you and throwing it in the washing bin. Neither of you moved after that. You weren’t sure either of you could. You’d never done this with him before. 
This was new. 
This was uncharted territory. 
“So . . . “ you trailed off.
“You should probably wait for them to fall asleep. Just in case they, uh, see,” he explained, quickly. “I mean you can stay, too . . . “
“Right,” you muttered, clearing your throat as you shifted your weight from one foot to the other.
“I texted Wooshik I’d need the room tonight,” he went on.
You furrowed your brows.
“He doesn’t know. Don’t worry.” He cleared his throat a little louder. “He just . . . owes me.”
“Right.”
“Um . . . “ he trailed off, scratching the back of his head. “That was . . . fun?”
And you couldn’t help it, you snorted. “Oh, come off it, Kook. We had sex. You can say it.”
“Yeah,” he laughed under his breath.
“Good sex,” you corrected, awkwardly.
That only got him to smirk. “Yeah?”
“Don’t let it go to your head.”
“Course not.”
Silence for only a second.
Then, you spoke, “So how long until you think I can sneak past Wooshik without being caught?”
“Long,” he winced. “We could, uh, watch a movie on my phone? If you want . . . “
You nodded. “Movie sounds . . . normal.”
And that was that. The two of you awkwardly settled into his bed, crowding around his phone while you both argued which movie to put on. For a second, it felt as though the two of you were kids again, bickering over whose turn it was to pick out the movie while your parents had dinner. 
And for a second, it felt nice. 
You let it feel like that.
The feeling consumed you as the movie began. And it stayed like that. Hell, it even stayed silent while the movie played on. (Which was, totally, uncharacteristic of both of you.)
Until . . . 
“Hey, uh, Poppy . . . “ Jungkook abruptly mumbled, speaking a little over the movie.
“Mmm,” you hummed, eyes still trained on the small screen. 
“I’d do anything to trade places with you. You deserved it more than me,” he softly spoke, his voice clear and . . . almost truthful. “I mean that.”
You didn’t respond. You only nodded, and for a second, you had begun to believe him.
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It was still dark when your eyes fluttered open. For a few seconds, you couldn't wrap your head around where you had managed to end up. First, you had an odd sense of deja vu hit you, and suddenly you were in your childhood bedroom at your parents' house. But no, that couldn't be right. Your room always smelled like the vanilla you always burned in your wax melter, not like this, which was a combination of wintergreen and something else that you couldn't quite place your finger on. This wasn't home, but it wasn't entirely unnerving. No, you didn't spring up in fear. Instead, you felt yourself relax, your muscles loosening as the smell consumed you.
You brought a hand up to your eyes then, rubbing them to clear the sleep from the corners. Dropping your hand, you finally took the time to focus your eyesight, squinting in the dark as you observed your surroundings. And when it hit you that you were in a dorm room, you realized you were still at the badminton center . . . but . . . this didn't look like your room.
As your confusion only heightened, you attempted to reach over to grab your phone from your nightstand where it usually rested all night. But, when you went to reach, you realized something was prohibiting you from budging. Only then did you glance beside you, finding none other than Jungkook fast asleep with his cheek resting on your shoulder as he softly snored into your skin. Looking further, you realized his tattooed arm was draped over your stomach and slightly tucked under your back, keeping you in place against his firm chest.
Everything came back to you then. The fight. His confession. The kiss and everything afterward. You must have fallen asleep during the movie. Glimpses of the past muddled in with the present, reminding you you'd been here before. Only this time was so much worse. So so so much worse.
Except . . . in that very moment, you couldn't bring yourself to tear away from him. His hold felt secure and his skin was warm and for the first time, you didn't mind the sound of snoring all too much. No, it didn't scare you, because you knew the truth--you just missed being touched. It didn't matter if it were him or anyone else on the team, you would've stayed regardless.
That is what you told yourself over and over again as you continued staring at Jungkook's face. You'd hate yourself when the realization sunk in a little more, but for right now, you reveled in the feeling of being touched; of being held. Jungkook being the one to hold you didn't matter. It didn't. You kept telling yourself it really didn't, because it didn't.
You didn't acknowledge the fact that you couldn't tear your eyes from his face, not for one second. No, you stayed there, head tilted to the side as you took in the stress lines between his brows. You couldn't see much in the dark, but you could see how much older he looked from the last time you'd found yourself in bed with him. And yet, he still looked so peaceful.
(OK, don't read too much into it, but you didn't half mind Jungkook when he wasn't awake to bother you. But . . . that was it. Really . . . )
As you lay in silence, listening to the soft in and out of his breathing, his brows twitched, the stress lines deepening. But he didn't wake. He stayed fast asleep, and you remained still, trying your hardest not to wake him. And then, something odd happened--you could have sworn you heard a small pained whimper leave his lips as his hold on you tightened almost as if he were trying to keep you from running even in his sleep.
You began to wonder then. What was plaguing Jungkook even in his dreams? You'd noticed a difference ever since you'd joined the team. He'd been different, odd even. Every time the team would go to the bar, he'd end up drunk and someone would end up calling an Uber for him, too bothered to take him back themselves.
(And granted, you'd never stayed to help, but . . . well . . . you guessed you couldn't make any more excuses for yourself. You never stayed. But . . . (and you wouldn't admit it), but you'd stay in the main area of the girls' dorm, waiting until you heard the beeping of the boys' dorm's keypad before you let yourself head off to bed.)
Still . . . Jungkook was different. It made you wonder what had happened to him in those three years. Did those years haunt him while he slept?
Why did you even care?
You didn't.
You shouldn't.
You couldn't.
Oddly enough that didn't stop you from reaching out, your fingers hesitating above his brows. You itched to smooth out the crease between his brows; to take it away; to restore the peace you once found within his soft features. But you couldn't push yourself to touch him, almost as if the act would be too raw. Instead, you looked away, shifting against him as you reached over to grab your phone from his nightstand. The movement made him stir slightly, but it wasn't until you flashed the phone's flashlight in his face that he finally jolted awake with a groan.
Still, groaning, he buried his face into the pillow, trying to block the light. "Turn that shit off."
( . . . But his arm was still wrapped around your waist . . . )
"Get off me, then. I can't breathe," you huffed, pinching his forearm.
"Nah."
"Then I'm not turning it off."
"Off."
"No."
"What if I say please?"
"Still no."
"With a cherry on top?"
"I hate cherries."
A beat of silence.
Then Jungkook was moving . . . his hand shooting out . . . toward your phone. You, on the other hand, were still half asleep, rendering you useless as he grabbed your phone, turned off the flashlight, and shoved it under his pillow before you could even blink. And to top it all off, he sent you one of those shit-eating grins you hadn't seen in a while before he tsked out a mocking, "Too slow."
A scoff left your lips as you shoved his shoulder. "You're such an asshole," you grumbled, turning to stare at the ceiling.
But you could still feel Jungkook staring at you, most definitely with that stupid grin on his face. And to confirm your thoughts, not even a second later, his arm was around your waist again, but this time, when you went to push him away, a kiss to your neck made the words tangle around your tongue.
"Mmm, I'm an asshole, am I?" Jungkook hummed against your neck, his breath tickling your skin.
You, however, didn't reply. You couldn't, especially when his gentle kisses turned sloppy as he trailed down the column of your neck all the way to your shoulder. His touch only wandered from there, and you wondered how long it had been since you felt like this. For the past three years, everyone had been afraid to touch you as if you were made of fragile glass. But Jungkook touched you as if he couldn't stop, as if something in him truly did crave you just as he had said . . . and you reveled in it a little more than you would ever admit to yourself.
Perhaps the reason behind it all was the fact that something deep in you, too, craved him as much as he did you. Perhaps that was why every single kiss he placed upon your skin both burned and cooled you. 
You'd be lying if you said it didn't scare you.
But you'd also be lying if you said it didn't also excite you.
And only when he pulled up the hem of your shirt, his mouth meeting your hardened nipple before taking the peak into his warm mouth and sucking, did you allow yourself to express just how much he affected you. "Kook," you whined, eyes fluttering shut as your hand subconsciously tangled in his tousled hair.
Jungkook only hummed in response, popping off your nipple only to suck upon the swell of your breast, no doubt trying to mark you (because Jungkook had always had a habit of claiming trophies for every game he won).
And for once you let him.
"Your tits are so fucking pretty," he murmured a second later, licking over the mark he'd left before he moved back to your nipple, swirling his tongue over the peak. "God--" he groaned as he squeezed your other breast, thumb stimulating the sensitive bud-- "I love them."
It would be so easy to lose yourself in the touch of him; to let him fill the numbness; to let him make you feel a little more whole again. But you'd already fucked up once that night. Hooking up with Jungkook was one thing, but hooking up with him twice in one night was a whole other thing.
You couldn't let yourself fall under his spell again, not when your second chance was in the palm of your hands. Jungkook was just a boy, but badminton was your purpose. It was what you were supposed to do; what you were good at; what you were meant to do. You were nothing without the trophies or the headlines or even the applause from your parents. And . . . you were tired of being nothing. You'd been nothing for too long; three years too long.
You couldn't handle being nothing any longer. That meant no more distractions. None. Not even one.
And this mistake . . . well . . . you'd made it two too many times before. You wouldn't make it three.
"Jungkook, enough," you forced yourself to bite out, putting a hand on his shoulder to halt him, but you couldn't tear him from your body. (OK . . . fine, it wasn't that you couldn't, but rather that something in you; the part of you that craved him wouldn't let you.)
But Jungkook hadn't caught onto this internal battle you seemed to be constantly fighting, instead, his lips remained in a dopey grin as he pressed one last gentle (a little too gentle for your liking) kiss to your sternum. "Later, then?" he mused, resting his cheek on your shoulder as he drew shapes on the bare skin of your stomach.
You smiled (and . . . get this . . . you hadn't even realized you had). "You're an idiot."
He lifted his head, his nose scrunched with one eye closed as he sported a small grin. "Glad to see your opinion hasn't changed even after all these years."
All these years.
It really had been so long since you'd last been this close to him for this long.
That was the whole reason you didn't reply. Your eyes just stayed trained on his face, taking in his features as if this were the last time you'd ever see him this close; this familiar; this comforting. Everything would go back to how it was before when the daylight seeped back in through the windows. You'd never see his eyes this close again. Or catch sight of the faint acne scars dotting his cheeks (that, really, only made him that much more attractive). 
Even now, as you stared at him (while he had reached over you to grab his phone, swiping through it), you caught sight of a detail you hadn't seen before. 
The light from his phone illuminated his face, revealing a small scar across his cheek. That was new. That hadn't been there three years ago. And all the possibilities as to how he could have gotten it swarmed your mind.
You couldn't help but ask . . . "Hey, uh . . . "
Jungkook tore his gaze from his phone, doe eyes meeting yours. And when you didn't say anything, he raised his brows in question.
That managed to get the words out of you. "How'd you get the scar?" you heard yourself mutter before you knew it. You tapped a finger to your own cheek but didn't dare touch his. That would be too personal; too intimate; too raw.
But as soon as those words left your lips, his face slowly fell, and the questions plaguing you only doubled. The stress lines between his brows formed once again, and you wished to smooth out those lines, but you didn't dare allow yourself.
Too personal; too intimate; too raw, you reminded yourself.
The two of you didn't do that.
So . . . 
. . . instead, you let the silence back in. You watched as he closed his eyes, breathing out through his nose almost as if he were truly living through his past once again. And then . . . his warmth was gone. He turned away from you, laying on his back while he stared at the ceiling, and all you could do was watch.
You almost couldn't believe it.
This didn't seem like Jungkook. This person barely looked like him.
The Jungkook you knew didn't take anything seriously. The Jungkook you knew never took that shit-eating grin off his face. The Jungkook you knew wasn't like this.
It made you wonder . . . 
"You know--" Jungkook spoke, his groggy voice pulling you out of your premature thoughts-- "sometimes I think you got some things right about me.”
You blinked, unsure of what to say. So you said the worst possible thing you could have said, "I am always right." And you immediately regretted it.
Yet . . . Jungkook simply gave a weak smile. But he didn't say another word.
"Well, come on--" you rushed out, trying not to give too much thought to the fact that it was you asking the questions rather than him-- "don't leave me hanging."
A beat of silence.
Then, he glanced your way.
His eyes found yours first. Then your lips. Then back to your eyes as if he were truly trying to memorize your features, before he released a heavy breath and gave you a tight-lipped smile (one that said more things than you could put into words). Then . . . then he said the last thing you were expecting: "I don't think I'm a good person."
And you found yourself wanting to pry into his mind; to comfort him rather than crave him. It was a tricky feeling . . . one you didn't particularly want to feel; one you'd never admit (not even to yourself) you did. 
When you spoke again, your voice was uncharacteristically soft. "Jungkook . . . " you trailed off, pondering over the questions roaming around in your head . . . until you found the one you'd been searching for. "Why are you here?"
His eyes had yet to leave yours, and you didn't dare look away. Yet . . . this didn't feel like a competition. It felt different. Soft. Not hard like your glares. Just . . . soft.
It seemed Jungkook felt this, too, as one moment you were wondering if he was going to give you another one of his half-assed lies, then the next he shocked you another time that night.
"I had no other choice," he finally confessed.
At his words, you paused. No, you felt as if the whole world did.
I had no other choice.
It made you wonder . . .
. . . what had truly happened in the three years you'd gone your separate ways? That scar. The look of hopelessness you’d seen on him at the bridge. The warning Hoseok had sent your way. What had happened to the Jungkook you’d grown up with? If he’d changed . . . truly changed . . . then what had changed him?
Whatever it was . . . he didn’t want to tell you. I don’t think I’m a good person, he’d told you. What had he done? And why . . . why did it concern you? 
You blinked, eyes traveling across his features and for the first time in a long time, your heart sunk for him. He just looked so . . . lost. 
And he was looking right back at you as if you had all the answers. But you didn’t. You didn’t know anything. You barely knew yourself . . .
Worst of all . . . you hated how all of this made you feel. You hated how you itched to clasp your hand around his, because that lost look . . . that utterly hopeless look was the same one you’d been staring at every time you looked in the mirror for the past three years. You knew that look and you despised it. 
You almost couldn’t believe it.
The two of you had gone your separate ways. You’d both ended up at entirely different ends of your shared plans. He was supposed to be the lucky one; the one to get out and make it big. And yet . . . you both shared that same look, and you couldn’t wrap your head around any of it.
And with your head still turning, you wet your lips, sucking in a sharp breath of air. “Jung—“
But . . . "Anyways," Jungkook interrupted you, abruptly blowing a raspberry. "Wanna fuck?"
That, well, that was unexpected. Perhaps it was the last thing you would have expected him to blurt out. And yet, it was the thing that got you.
You couldn’t help it, you burst out laughing. Entirely forgetting who he was and who you were, you let yourself laugh, throwing your head back into the pillow as you clasped a hand around your mouth to muffle your laughter. It was just so out there, and yet, you should’ve predicted it because this was Jungkook. 
Still . . . it managed to make you laugh in a way you hadn’t in years.
Slowly coming down from your high, you felt warmth on your stomach. Only then did you realize Jungkook was absentmindedly running his fingers up and down your ribs as you laughed. And surprisingly, when you realized this, you didn’t push him away. No, instead, you pretended you didn’t see him; didn’t feel him, and turned to face him, a small smile still on your face. And he . . . he was staring down at you, his eyes crinkled with a lazy grin on his face. (Fuck, fine! His handsome face. That was really why you were lost in a daze when you turned back to meet his gaze.)
As if the look he was giving you wasn’t enough, he went a step further and murmured, "Wasn't sure if I'd ever hear that again.” 
(As if the two of you were still living in the past, his words brought you a sense of comfort plagued with dread. It was almost as if none of this had ever happened; as if the two of you were still kids eager to start your careers. You’d loved badminton back then. (You still did but . . . ) He had too. (You weren’t sure how much of that was still true.) But the future was limitless back then, and his words had taken you back three years. It was odd.)
And then . . .
. . . He smiled.
But . . . you remained silent.
He, however, didn't stop smiling. “Don't worry,” he hummed out before he averted his gaze while pulling up the edge of the covers draped over your body. “I'll take care of you—“ he raised his brows, gesturing toward your . . . pelvic . . . region— “later.”
That got you to smile (although you hadn’t realized you were even doing it). "Did you just?” you scoffed in disbelief as you slapped his arm. “You didn't.”
Jungkook only went on. "Oh—“ he cupped his hand around his ear— “you hear that?"
"Jungkook.”
"Shh, shh, listen," he hissed out as he squinted his eyes before he clicked his tongue and nodded in confirmation. "She's purring."
"God, ew!"
"Baby, it’s OK, pussy’s just—“
You pushed his shoulder. "Don't.”
“I’ve got catnip around here somewhere, you know,” he went on. “If she gets too—“
You glared at him, cutting him off. No words left your lips, and yet, Jungkook still found this all too amusing. The cheeky grin on his face grew until he couldn’t take it anymore and lowered his head, laughing into your neck. (You didn’t even try to push him off. Because it wasn’t worth it, not because you actually liked his touch . . . )
When you felt his soft laughter lessen and turn into gentle kisses trailing up and down your neck, you felt your eyes flutter closed. And he just kept touching you, kissing the past away with those addictive lips of his, and you let him. You felt yourself crave him more and more, and you wondered how bad it would be to have just one more taste of him. You just . . . wanted to remember (you’d forgotten enough already; sacrificed too much and yet not enough; you wanted more; you wanted someone who would touch you like you were made to be broken; you wanted him).
Would you let yourself have him? Just one more time? Just . . . once more?
You felt your morals crumble the more he pressed lazy open-mouthed kisses against your neck. He didn’t go farther than that, but you . . . you wanted more . . . so much more.
You didn’t care if you’d regret it in the morning. More more more was the only thing you could think. And it was the exact reason why you pressed a hand to his jaw, angling his face toward yours, just seconds before you pressed your lips against his, asking him to ruin you. And he accepted your offer . . . hesitating as he pulled back slightly and grazed your lips with his, while his hand ended up drawing circles across your pelvic region.
He didn't inch further, though. No, he kept his eyes on you, searching your face as his fingers caressed your lower stomach, gentle and calm. “Can you promise me something?" he asked after a second, eyes still on you.
"Mmm?"
The sound of him swallowing echoed in the air, and you tried to ignore how it made your stomach sink. But still, you listened, trying not to lose yourself entirely in his touch.
A beat of silence passed.
Then, he spoke.
 "Don't hate me in the morning.”
Your brows pinched together, and you knew how you looked—vulnerable. But you didn’t bother covering it up. Hell, you didn’t bother saying anything.
Don’t hate me in the morning, he’d asked you.
You swallowed hard.
“Please,” he added, his voice different . . . almost as vulnerable as you looked.
And you realized one thing: he wasn’t asking . . . he was begging.
Still, you couldn’t speak. You weren’t sure you could let yourself. However, you did act.
One second he was searching your eyes for an answer, then the next you were leaning forward to connect your lips together, hoping this would be enough to answer his pleas. And he accepted it, wrapping a muscular arm around your waist as he deepened the kiss, trying to taste all of you.
The world blurred. Time morphed together—the past and present consuming the two of you as you reached for his hand, pulling him between your legs. He graciously accepted your offer, slipping his hand under your underwear and pumping his fingers into your heat while he swallowed your soft moans. The world blurred into pleasure.
And only after he’d made you cum on his fingers did he reach for a condom, sliding it over his length moments before you both rid yourselves of your clothes. He entered your still pulsing core then, melding the two of you together. It was a carnal dance . . . one you refused to admit was just as vulnerable as the look you’d give him. But you didn’t care . . . not when he felt like this.
Something about this time was different though. He fucked you slow, never soft, but always deep. He was everywhere, consuming you moan by moan. 
And then:
Don’t hate me in the morning, you heard as he buried his face into your neck, groaning softly while he painted the condom white. Don’t hate me in the morning, you acknowledged as his skilled thumb brought you to another orgasm that night all the while he stayed sheathed inside of your warm heat. Please, you felt as he pulled out (lazily tying the condom off and flinging it into the trash) and flopped down beside you, but not before he pressed a lingering kiss to your forehead, whispering how good you had been for him.
He was asleep, snoring softly before you could process what you’d done. You’d slept with him again, and you weren’t sure if you hated him or yourself. But . . . you knew it wasn’t both.
Don’t hate me in the morning, you heard again as you closed your eyes for the final time that night. But in the morning, you left before he awoke, sneaking past Wooshik, who was passed out on the couch in the main living area. Because you decided this was just a hookup. You didn't care about him.
You didn't.
You shouldn't.
You wouldn't.
Not after all this time. Not after everything.
But you couldn’t deny the obvious . . .
. . . you’d kept your promise: when you awoke in the morning . . . you didn’t hate him.
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taglist: 
@hrts4kook , @taehyungs-chopsticks , @loomipee , @st3ft0n3s , @callmenada , @neg-l3ct , @dawn33 , @illegurlbangtan , @jeonsdetails , @rihabaxl , @yoongipost , @jjk1iscoming , @miumiugurl , @sadgirlroo​ , @lucwithbangtan , @iamsisuu , @shanelleeex , @beonim , @sherlynxx , @fairy1919
(tumblr hates me and won’t let me tag, but i swear i love you guys and appreciate you. tumblr is against me. <3)
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jvngkook97 · 2 months ago
Text
Sucker for Love
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synopsis; in which your best friend happens to be a vampire and the only time he’s able to be himself in the world is during Halloween night. OR you’ve been in love with your best friend for a long ass time and want him to bite you for a change and not a random person, which for some reason, he refuses to do. they say love hurts, and damn it all that you want it too.
pairing; vampire!jungkook x human!reader
genre; angst, fluff, humor, horror, smut, f2l, vampire au
warnings; cursing, jealousy, blood, violence (non explicit), death (non explicit), horror movie tropes, bad jokes, VAMPIRE KOO cause yes that’s a whole ass warning in itself CMON, a few familiar faces make an appearance, there’s no smut in this chapter but there will be in a future one so be sure to read the warnings carefully in order to avoid reading something you’re uncomfortable with pls and ty
rating; 21+ MINORS DNI
w/c; 7,101
a/n; y’all knew it was coming, it was only a matter of time. consider this both a ‘happy jungkook day’ and ‘Halloween’ story submission in one. SORRY IT’S LATE. decided to split this into two chapters cause I like the way this one left off. hopefully, that one will be out soon. like + reblog if you enjoyed. don’t be a silent reader! <3 feedback is always appreciated and helps keep this writer motivated.
networks; @ficscafe, @thebtswritersclub, @btshoneyhive, @kflixnet
01. 02. 03
“You are not going out dressed like that.”
“I—Excuse me? This is literally the only night I can go out like this!”
He tugs on the front of his white, nearly see-through, frilly long and loose blouse with a gusto. His face is morphed into one of disbelief as he stares into your dead panned expression.
“No. I see you in that outfit every single day. Are you not aware of the time difference?” Your arms are crossed, hip jutted out that makes the slit in the side of your costume widen even more. As much as he fights it, he can’t help but let his eyes flicker to the overly exposed skin as his tongue darts out for a split second to wet his lips and play nervously with his lip ring.
When his eyes meet yours he knows you’ve caught him in the act, if not for the elegant yet sultry way you walked towards his figure with a smirk adorning your red painted lips. The cape you were wearing framed you perfectly and only accentuated your beauty even more. As much as he hates to admit it, considering what your costume of choice pertains too. Them. His entire body cringes inwardly.
Your face rises to meet his, a feat that normally has you on your tip toes to complete the action, but not tonight. Tonight, your feet are clad in ruby red heels that give you the perfect amount of height and compliment your costume of choice for the evening — little red riding hood — knowing full well how much it would rile the centuries old vampire in front of you.
“And yet you have to choose a costume from a storybook that has to do with–,” his face scrunches, nose crinkling, and the corner of his lip rising into a small snarl that exposes one long, sharp, fang. “–wolves? I mean, really y/n?”
“What can I say? Hairy bodies are a turn on.”
A loud snort from him. Laughter bubbles in your throat. One coffin shaped, manicured hand lays over his chest. If he weren’t the undead, you have no doubt that it would be beating as erratically as yours currently is due to the close proximity, or maybe that’s just you and your ridiculous crush you’ve had on the vampire for a long time now.
Unbeknownst to you, the sound was like music to the vampire’s ears as he placed one massive tattooed covered hand over yours to squeeze it gently, it meant you had blood pumping through your veins, the vital organ still going strong.
You were still here.
You were still with him.
You were still alive.
Not like on the night where he first found your pale, nearly lifeless body all those years ago.
‿෴🦇෴‿
Then ~ Wednesday, October 31st, 2018 11:30PM
“Some friends they are.”
You crossed your arms tighter around your chest, attempting and failing to secure some semblance of body heat from the chilly, autumn night air. Leaves rustled in the biting wind, littering empty streets underneath the light of the full moon as you slowly and quite wobbly made your way back to your studio apartment. You regretted taking that extra shot before leaving the party, almost as much as you regretted entrusting your supposed friends with letting you know when they were leaving. Now here you were, all alone on Halloween night.
Your horror loving mind drifted to the many movies that started out on a night just like this, one’s where you previously scolded the character for making such a foolish life choice. Even going so far as saying that they deserved to be murdered brutally for their careless act. Look at you now, doing the same exact thing you once admonished with a mocking laugh at the tv screen right before the killer strikes and–
A twig snapping had your head whipping to the side, yet you saw nothing. The hairs on the back of your neck stood on end, however, as if there was someone or something out there watching you, tucked just out of sight behind the line of trees that led to the woods at the edge of town.
“Oh no.” You raised your voice to the dark woods around you with sarcasm. “I sure hope there aren’t any sexy vampires looking for prey out here or heaven forbid a captive!” Shaking your head at your own sense of humor, you snickered, opening your mouth to spew some more dark comedic gold that gets silenced by yet another twig snapping but this time it was closer.
Much closer.
Fuck.
Picking up your once slow pace, your heels clicking on the paved, stone walkway in a frenzied haste do you hear a more fear inducing sound from right behind you. A voice.
“When I let go, run for your life.”
It’s only when the disembodied voice breathlessly caresses the shell of your ear, do you notice how badly you’re shaking. Let alone the fact that there’s a a very pale, lanky, hand on your shoulder. True to their word, they let you go.
And you run for your fucking life.
Now you understood why those many characters would run straight into dark woods, rather than continue down the lit up street. In the woods, you could hide. On the streets, you were open and vulnerable. Wasn’t much of a tough decision when you’re the one being pursued.
Another thing you now understood, how it was so easy to–
The heel of your shoe embedded itself into the soft, wet soil and latched itself in between two branches sticking out of the ground with perfect precision and you tripped. Your arms flung themselves out haphazardly in a desperate attempt to catch your unprecedented fall. Hands, arms, legs and knees becoming scraped by various rocks and branches that poked out from beneath the ground.
Your hands immediately went to the strap of your heel and with shaky hands you barely managed to unbuckle the impromptu foot restraint, freeing yourself and pushing your exhausted body back up into a standing position. Coming to the conclusion you were better completely barefoot now, you freed your other foot from the speed hindering heel and chucked it angrily to the side. A heavy mist now clung to the woods, halting what little moonlight remained from passing through the already thick foliage of the cluster of trees around you.
Straining your eyes through the mist, you saw a shadow stood in the distance, completely still except for the wave of a hand. A whimper escaped your mouth, lips trembling and eyes watering. They had found you, but you won’t be giving up that easily.
Wiping your eyes in order to see clearly, you postured yourself in a position to run and bolted out of there, dodging branches and bushes along the way that only cut you up even more until you stumbled into an open area in the woods that housed an abandoned building.
A very creepy, dark, decrepit, seemingly haunted abandoned building.
Well, shit.
Checking the woods behind you, you see a blur making its way towards you and you realize that once again, you have no choice but to make the absolute worst choice possible.
You needed to go into the building.
Steeling your resolve into not dying, you thrust open the rusty door that was almost falling off its hinges at the years of decay and not being used. The screeching it emanated rivaled that of a nail on a chalkboard and your entire body cringed. Pushing your way into the darkness, you blindly felt for a wall to help maneuver your way through.
During your slow ascent into the building, does the door suddenly slam behind you, causing you to jump and let out a shrill shriek. Along with the deafening slam do you hear what sounds like a lock clicking into place.
What the actual fuck was going on here? Was this all actually real or a really elaborate prank set up by your shitty friends? Whatever it was, you weren’t having it anymore. Time to do what you do best when you’re scared – use your sense of humor.
“This is very funny.” You announce to the supposedly empty room around you. The door had locked itself, and you found yourself even moreso alone with little applicable skill to get yourself out of there. “I’m not the protagonist type, I’m more of the comedic best friend character. Now can someone please bust in here and save me?”
Silence. Nothing but eerie silence.
It was worth a shot.
Unlike the blur you saw in the woods, this time you saw more of a wispy white fog begin to appear on the opposite side of the room. It cast a faint glow, more than enough for you to utilize it and sprint down the hallway that made itself visible due to your ghostly accomplice.
Bare feet padded quickly along, and you tried your best not to look behind you just knowing that you wouldn’t like what you saw. So, instead, you plowed through the various hallways that now felt like an endless maze with how alike they appeared. The doors that lined the hallways were the same as well, solid except for a thinly shaped window that was planted in the middle within eyesight of what’s deemed ‘normal height’ for a human. You wondered what this place was used for, but thought best not to investigate and trouble yourself further with details.
The only thing you should be concerned about is getting out of this place alive.
The heavy fall of boots echoed across the halls that made you pause in your step to listen closer and decipher which direction it was coming from. Not having an inkling of the layout of this building, you realized trying to figure it out was futile and instead continued on. It wasn’t until you heard the footfalls sound in the hallway you just exited from did you begin searching for a door that was unlocked in order to hide.
Jiggling several handles, you found they were all locked. You just about gave up hope when you saw a door at the end of the hallway that was cracked open. Quietly running towards the door, the boots crept closer. Just as you slid your body through the crack of the door and shut it all but a sliver so you could peek through, did the mystery predator reveal themselves.
Your breath caught in your throat, eyes collecting pools of liquid that trailed down your face as you tried your damndest not to make a sound as they inched closer and closer to your hideout.
They were wearing all black clothing, the only pop of color coming from the hideous stark white mask that was littered with specks of something you couldn’t quite make out due to the distance, the mask that covered their face successfully hiding their true identity. As they came within a yard away from the door, did you come to the grim conclusion that this person had what looked to be dark, red splatters of an unknown substance all over their clothes and mask.
Something that was scarily akin to blood.
Closing your eyes, your hands covered your mouth in a fruitless attempt to stifle the whimpering that wanted to come out from the sheer terror that coursed through your veins. Every passing moment felt eternal. And you couldn’t tell if closing your eyes made it better or worse.
You didn’t know if hiding would be the ultimate factor in you getting out alive or not, but it was the only idea you had left. As you pushed yourself further into the corner of the room, your back slid down the wall in relief once the footsteps faded.
Taking a deep breath, your head fell on your knees. With a shaky exhale you let out a minuscule puff of laughter. You were tired, your body was tired. It wasn’t till you felt you had a moment of safety did your body wind down from its adrenaline rush and now all you felt was the crash that comes after it. You allowed this feeling for only a fleeting second, then hoisted your body up and out the door, but not before cautiously poking your head out to be sure the mystery figure was truly gone.
They were. For now.
You stepped out from your safe haven and attempted to make your way back down the hallway from whence you came, hoping you’ll get dumb luck down another corridor and find the exit. Your heart pounded this time, but not from fear. This time, it was pumping with liquid courage through your veins.
Despite your earlier declaration of being the secondary comedic relief, you decided with renewed vigor that you would be the final girl.
Oh, how wrong you were.
There was a sharp pain in the back of your head, your mouth opened in a silent scream that would never come as your body collapsed on the cold, tile floor and you were down for the count. Your body no longer having the energy to fight back, that liquid courage seemingly sucked up in a matter of seconds you just lay there – still. Your eyes struggled to stay open as you blinked them, trying to focus on the white mask that was within your line of sight as the figure knelt down and stroked your forehead, gently pushing the clump of hair that fell in your face away and tucking it behind your ear. The very same ear where you could feel a trickle of liquid slither down the side of your face and off your nose. The last thing you see being red before you closed your eyes for what you thought would be the last time.
Jungkook’s POV ~ The Same Night
He sniffed the air, smelling the faint metallic odor of ‘crimson crack’ as he liked to call it. Tilting his head back, he closed his eyes and honed in on it, letting it take over every one of his senses in order to conclude where the source is coming from. Opening his eyes, they flashed a deep red, before returning back to their usual brown state.
In a flash, he was gone.
When he reappeared, he was standing in front of an abandoned building. His head tilted in confusion, ears perking when they hear the tall tale sign of a human heartbeat. Faint, but there. And it seemed to be getting closer, even a hint louder in its desperate attempt to keep pumping blood, oxygen, life to its human shell.
Interesting.
His hand reached for the door handle, which he promptly brought back to his side and took a step back when he realized the handle was turning on its own and the door began to open. He clasped his hands together in front of his abdomen and waited for the grand reveal of his next meal.
With his centuries of life, he would’ve thought that he saw it all. Apparently, that wasn’t the case. This night, he would have another first.
Seeing you. Smelling you.
Your blood alone caused the saliva in his mouth to pool, the scent making him feel dizzy in a state of euphoria. Body vibrating with the need to get closer to you, to taste you. He nearly pounced, if not for the minor inconvenient detail of your limp body being carried over the shoulder by an all black clothed human male. The mask this male chose was displeasing to the eyes in a sense of it was so gaudy and fake.
The male stiffened upon seeing Jungkook, the hand that clenched the knife that he used to both knock you out and engrave his alias initials into the length of your neck gripped the handle, his knuckles becoming more pronounce as they strained against the leather material of black gloves he was wearing.
“Who the fuck are you?”
Jungkook could tell that the male had anger issues. His voice was devoid of emotion, cold. It made Jungkook chuckle with a deep laugh that had the masked assailant stepping forward in hopes of scaring Jungkook. It only spurred on the laughter more, and made the male even more angry.
“Shut the fuck up, you freak! You wanna die?”
“Do you?” The laughter ceased as if by a flip of a switch. The wind blew between the two males where only one couldn’t suppress the shiver that went down their spine. The masked male thoughtlessly threw your unconscious body onto the ground next to him, a loud ‘thump’ followed shortly after your weighted body hit the solid dirt of the woods. He then poised himself with the bloodied knife raised in front of him, ready to strike with the intent to kill.
Jungkook tsked sardonically.
“Give me the girl and I’ll let you go.”
He thought the deal was good. The masked man did not.
“Fuck you. She’s mine. Get your own, the night’s young.”
“True, it is. But I’m not. And I’m easily annoyed. So, I’ll give you one more chance, human. Give me the girl.”
The masked male blamed his obscured sight from the small holes that the mask granted him, the material only making it harder for him to see Jungkook clearly. Though, he swears he sees his eyes flash red, but it’s gone within the next blink of his eyes. His gut tells him to run, but his pride prevents him from doing so.
The masked male makes his move, and his knife impales into Jungkook’s chest — directly where his beating heart should’ve been. Except, it wasn’t.
“My turn.”
Jungkook grips the male by his arm and yanks his body until it’s pressed tightly against his, using his other arm to encase the squirming male and prevent him from escaping. The mask falls off to reveal a young face, barely hitting his mid 20s. The amount of fear that is on his face gives Jungkook a sick sense of satisfaction.
“What are you?”
The male whispers fearfully. Jungkook doesn’t answer, and instead grins widely. Both fangs twinkled in the faint moonlight as the male’s eyes widened in horror, only to close moments later as Jungkook sinks his fangs into the male’s neck and begins to drain him of every drop of blood in his body.
Y/N’s POV ~ Moment’s Later
When you come to, you find yourself laying on the dirty earth floor as your nails dig into the soil and it gets stuck underneath. Inhaling a breath – it’s crisp, cool, autumn air. You let out a broken whimper when you realize that you’re alive, but it hurts to move. Your head is at an awkward angle, but you can make out two blurry figures out of your peripheral. One looks limp, and the other looks as if they’re embracing the other in order to keep them standing.
In a way, you were right. Your eyes then dart to the fallen off mask that’s settled a few yards in front of you, and you wonder what exactly happened to your perpetrator for them to let you go. You don’t have time to dwell on it for too long, as the next thing you see is the back of your eyelids as you pass back out. It seems like your mind was awake, but your body still needed some recovering.
The next time you open your eyes you’re laying in a huge bed, in a huge room that looks like you’ve been transported into Dracula’s castle, but you were still in a modern home. The decor and looked ancient and worn, yet surprisingly still in good condition. As you sat up, your body no longer felt drained of energy, and in fact, you felt refreshed and reinvigorated.
Your bare feet hit the cool flooring as you stand up straight. A knock on the closed bedroom door has you flinching back to your previously scared state and you hold your breath as the door slowly opens.
In the threshold of the door stands a very attractive male, who looks like along with this castle, he’s from the world of Dracula. His skin is almost sickly pale, yet his eyes held a natural warmth to them. He just stands there, and doesn’t attempt to step inside once he notices your scared expression.
“I’m not going to hurt you.”
His voice is smooth and velvety. Despite not knowing this person and going through the ordeal you were just in, your gut tells you that you can trust them. So, either stupidly or —no, just stupidly — you do.
“I know.”
When he hears your voice for the first time, his stomach does flips. It was in that moment a kind of bond was formed, and you’ve been inseparable since.
‿෴🦇෴‿
Now ~ Monday, October 31st, 2022 7:50PM
His hand can’t help but trace the faint scarring of initials that still resides on your neck to this day. A constant reminder to him and you of the horrific, yet fateful, night you met.
Your eyes close reflexively upon contact and you let out a sigh of discontent, knowing where his mind just wandered to, as does yours.
“Koo, I’m still here. It’s okay.”
Your eyes open to meet his. There’s a pinch inbetween his brows that you just want to rub away with your finger, so you do. He chuckles, the vibration flowing through your own body in waves that has you giving him a warm smile.
“I was doing it again, wasn’t I?”
“You were.”
He clicks his tongue, shaking his head to rid of the intruding and unpleasant thoughts and regain focus on the mission for tonight – going out with you on Halloween night to a frat party you were invited to by a brainless jock that Jungkook already hates with a burning passion for catching your attention.
“Shall we go?”
Your eyes narrow into his and you pat his chest, before turning and walking away from him to reach into your bag and pull out an outfit you brought just for him. It wasn’t so much a costume as it was an outfit you just really wanted to see him in.
“Nice try, buddy. But I didn’t forget.” You make your way back over to him with the outfit held out in front of you. “Wear this. No objections.”
He groaned, but resigned to his fate and took the outfit from your outstretched hand. He waves his hand as a motion for you to turn around while he changes. You lift a lone brow at his sudden shyness.
“It’s not like I haven’t seen you nude before.”
He rolls his eyes, then narrows them at yours. You throw your hands up in defeat and make a show of slowly turning around until your back is to him. As you bring your hands back down, one subconsciously falls to the scarred initials on their own and just like Jungkook, some aspects of that night fog the forefront of your mind.
You let out a chortle that catches Jungkook’s attention, his eyes fall immediately to where your hand resides as he zips up the black pants you wanted him to wear, but he doesn’t say anything. He knows he doesn’t have too, you always tend to speak your mind.
“Remember when I thought for a second that you were actually going to hold me captive?”
He does. As does his body, even moreso as he flexes the muscles of his back to shrug on the crimson red bomber jacket that covers the plain, black shirt he’s wearing underneath. Tugging the cuffs of the sleeves down into a comfortable position.
“Yeah. I gave you the benefit of the doubt to just walk out the door, and as soon as I turn my back to you, you stab me.”
You throw your head back in laughter, and he can’t help the quirk of his lip that occurs at the sight and sound of it. There’s no blood pumping through his veins, no warmth to his skin, but still he felt a unique glow when it came to you that was within the depths of his soul. It was hard to describe, and he couldn’t say exactly how it was possible, but it happened. Only when it ever came to you. And for a moment, he felt a sliver of being human again.
“Can you blame me though?” He doesn’t. “Are you almost done?”
“Impatience will be the death of you.”
“I think knives will be the death of me, actually. Maybe some poison.”
He folds his arms across his chest.
“Funny.”
“I thought so.”
“You can turn around now.”
“I still don’t understand why you didn’t want me to wat–,” your words die in your throat as you turn around and take Jungkook in in all his glory. Jesus. You changed your mind. This outfit would be the death of you. Your thighs rub together without your knowing, it makes Jungkook’s nostrils flare for a second, and he stiffens, clearing his throat.
“That bad, huh?” He tries to break the tension that came out of nowhere as you continued to stare at him. It’s like your brain stopped computing he looked that good.
“Oh, shut up. Don’t pretend that you don’t know how sexy and amazing you are.”
The words flew out of your mouth unfiltered, unfaltering, and you weren’t even ashamed. It baffles him how a human could be so truthful. So unabashed.
“Let’s just go.” He’s still stiff as he brushes past you and you catch the whiff of the earthy and musky scent that is just naturally him, it only made the want for him that much more prominent and you trail behind him like a lost puppy.
‿෴🦇෴‿
Frat House ~ 8:24PM
Even though you two are early, the party is already in full swing. The music is loud, so damn loud, it makes Jungkook’s sensitivity to sound a hinderence in his opinion - but he does his best not to let it ruin the night. Before you even stepped inside, the porch was littered with bodies as a couple seemed to be making out not too far from the entrance of the house. Red solo cups, beer cans and bottles alike were thrown haphazardly in the bushes surrounding the porch.
How could humans be so careless? Jungkook thought with a grimace. Back in his day it was frowned upon, but now it was the new normal. How the times have changed.
His nose crinkled in disgust at the public display of affection that should be withheld for closed quarters, and you just walked by like it was second nature. The front door wasn’t even fully closed, so all you had to do was push it open to gain access. From what you heard, you thought it was going to be a ‘limited access’ party, apparently you heard wrong. It felt like the entirety of the school was present and upon the door shutting behind you two, the cluster of body heat was more than prominent, triggering your slight case of claustrophobia.
Jungkook could sense your distress, his open palm rested securely on your lower back as his thumb rubbed circles in hopes of easing your anxiety. He could feel you tense, then relax. Bending down so his head was next to yours he asked you a question.
“Want to head to the back?”
You nod your head in answer and he guides you both through the crowd. You do your best to smile and wave at those you know so as not to be rude, but in truth, you just wanted to get the hell out of there for now.
“Empty handed? Here!”
A random guy pops up next to you both as you almost make it to the back door from the kitchen, and shoved two red solo cups of an unknown liquid into your hands. He salutes with a dopey smile and saunters off. You presume he’s going to fill more cups for other random guests. He looked familiar now that you thought about it, and you think it has to do with his two different colored eyes, it always wowed you.
Before you know it, you’re both back outside in the night air and it’s easier to breathe. Jungkook swiftly grabs the cup from your hands and dumps it into a bush nearby. You give him a quizzical look as he dumps his as well.
When he focuses his attention back onto your puzzled one, does he explain his reasoning.
“Never drink from a cup that you didn’t pour yourself, you don’t know what could be in it.”
Your mouth forms an ‘O’ shape and you heart palpitates from the level of protectiveness he’s showing. It never fails to get your heart racing.
He smirks knowingly, and opens his mouth to make a flirtatious comment.
“I love how your heart races for–,”
He’s cut off by a letterman jacket and he wonders what the big deal with them are while the guy pulls you into a tight hug with a big grin.
“Y/N! You made it!” His enthusiasm seems genuine as he tightens his hold on you. Not seeming to care in the least bit that he has to bend over awkwardly to accommodate your obvious height difference. It causes a snarl to build within Jungkook’s chest that he fights to suppress so as not to bring unwanted attention to himself.
“Joonie! Thanks for the invite!” Your tone is light and airy, a soft puff a laughter escapes your lips at the death grip he has on you. You savor the hug, returning it in earnest before you mutually let each other go. His hands are on your shoulders as he takes in your costume of choice.
“Little red, hm?” His brow raises and he lets out a bellowing laugh that you can’t help but join in on. You forgot about the inside joke that was made back in your freshman year of college and he makes a playful jeer.
“Am I still the big bad wolf?” He waggles his eyebrows feigning being seductive, and you snort in embarrassment that causes the natural flush in your cheeks to make a show. It was a one time misjudgement when you decided to listen to the gossip of those around you, rather than form your own opinion. Everyone described Kim Namjoon as a heartless, hard headed, quick to temper and pessimistic jock. You would learn, in fact, he was very much the opposite and those who said otherwise just never had the courage to even try and befriend the tall, lovable, giant you now consider a good friend. Their loss.
Jungkook hates it. He hates all of it. What was this talk of being a wolf? He wasn’t one. He was normal. Jungkook would be able to tell otherwise. And why are you acting as if you completely erased his presence from your side like he wasn’t even there. Anger began to rise, and he closed his eyes in order to prevent the red from showing to the humans around him. He should’ve worn his contacts, but you encouraged him to just ‘be himself’ whatever that means.
Jealousy. A ridiculous human emotion that unfortunately can still occur with vampires.
He loathed it. Like he loathed this human boy.
He began to mimic the timing of breathing as a form of meditation, regaining his sanity and self back just in time for you to acknowledge him and introduce him to your male companion.
“Joon, I’d like you to meet my good friend Jungkook. Jungkook, this is Namjoon. He’s the host, and my science partner.”
Namjoon scoffs at your introduction of him.
“Just your science partner, huh? Is that all I am to you? A lab partner that makes sure you pass the class in order to graduate this year?”
You give a feigned moment of silence as if in thought, your finger resting on your bottom lip that slightly parts them in the process. Jungkook doesn’t miss the way Namjoon’s eyes flicker to them upon the innocent action, but you do. All you do is give an over exaggerated wink in reply. He places a hand over his heart and acts hurt.
Seems like this human boy has taken an interest in you. He wonders if you feel the same.
Again. He feels the jealousy build and stiffens, then relaxes though his fists stay clenched tightly behind him. He plasters a fake smile on and interrupts your little flirtatious banter.
“Pleasure.” His hand is outstretched, waiting.
Namjoon just sees it as a polite gesture and takes it with a soft, yet firm grip. He realizes that there’s even a slight height difference with the jock himself as he steps forward towards Jungkook, leaning into the handshake. It takes everything that Jungkook has not to crush every bone in his hand as he relays what is considered normal strength for a human during a handshake.
You watch the two with wary eyes, but inwardly sigh with relief when their hands part and nothing else happens. Maybe they could be friends after all, or so that’s what you hoped.
“Please, by all means. Feel free to take advantage of the beverages and food. Mi casa es su casa, and all that jazz!” Another female party goer slides into Namjoon’s side and places a hand on his chest. Jungkook is surprised when you greet the female with even more excitement. He assumed you would be upset, furious even.
“Natalie! I thought you said you weren’t going to be able to make it?” You gave the girl a mock glare, and she gave a twinkling laugh in return. Namjoon stared down at this ‘Natalie’ with love and adoration. Jungkook was confused.
“I was able to convince my family to postpone leaving until tomorrow so I could congratulate–,” Natalie pats his chest and looks up into Namjoon’s eyes with just as much love, if not more, before continuing. “this guy on his big scholarship!”
Namjoon’s face flushes from the admission. Your mouth drops open in bewilderment. You punch Namjoon hard in the shoulder and he winces.
“Geez! Ow!”
“You jerk! How could you not tell me?!”
“I was going to, tonight!”
You side-hug Namjoon and Natalie and make promises to catch up. Jungkook pretends not to hear when Natalie whispers in your ear about a ‘double date’ and instead acts like the sight of people gyrating against each other is more appealing. It’s not. But something does transcribe whilst he’s staring at the couples that actually know how to dance properly.
Nostalgia washes over Jungkook, like the gentle sway of a tide pulling his conscience to another time, another place. He felt the phantom stirrings of movement where his heart would’ve still been beating back then, the desire to grin and to dance, but could only place the grainiest of images to memory. He couldn’t quite remember what it was that brought him a feeling of such warmth and fondness, but he felt enchanted to stay within that feeling.
Natalie and Namjoon have long since departed, but Jungkook was still stuck in a time long passed. You cautiously place a hand on his cheek, caressing it while gently rubbing your thumb against his sharp jawbone.
“Jungkook? You still with me?”
The glaze in his eyes disperses upon your call of his name, and his eyes instantly lock with your concerned ones. He gives you a faint smile, sucking in a breath to release it and then answers you.
“I’m still here.”
This isn’t the first time this has happened. Jungkook getting lost in the past. He was never afraid to answer any questions you had for him back when he was human, or even when he was turned by a rogue vampire and left to learn the consequences and rewards of being a vampire and immortal all on his own. His life was hard, but it was still life. Something he didn’t treasure until he was no longer alive, and rather just living — existing.
He realizes that he never had a reason to feel alive, until now.
Until you.
He had tried to do what he could to keep you at arm’s length. Your smile was so disarming, you were so genuine, that he couldn’t help but get close to you. Even when knowing it was a bad idea. He didn’t want to fall in love with you. He kept ignoring the intruding bloom in his chest, telling himself that it would wither on its own.
It never did. It just grew.
It grew a forest of flowers within him, the colors so vibrant and the aroma so intoxicating that it was hard not to fall in love with you when it was you who consumed his entire being, his entire soul, or what was left of it.
And you didn’t even know.
‿෴🦇෴‿
You had been at the party for hours now. Talking, mingling, even dancing a little. Much to your amusement and Jungkook’s displeasure.
His hands rested politely on your waist, never once faltering into the danger zone. Your arms were wrapped loosely around his shoulders, hands dangling. A slow song was on, one you never listened to fully due to how slow it was, seeing as you usually only heard it when you were driving your car and as soon as it would come on you would change the station to a more upbeat option to keep you awake. But, you’ll admit, it was growing on you.
Much like the vampire in front of you has over the years of knowing him. His mannerisms, his personality, his way of talking, his way of dressing. You kept every minute detail locked away inside your head, and your unspoken feelings locked inside your heart. Though, as you both stared into each other’s eyes in a way that should’ve been saved for lover’s, you wonder briefly, albeit hopeless romantically – if he might, just might, feel the same way.
Your body is buzzing with all the alcohol you’ve consumed throughout the night, and as you sway to the song, do you realize how much it’s him who is actually holding you up discreetly and leading you. It’s only when he suddenly stops, does your wobbly figure collapse into his taught chest. Your ear lays against where his heart would be, yet you hear nothing. Another stark reminder of the difference between you two, as your heart raced at how close you two were.
He doesn’t say anything, standing still. When you look up from his chest, his gaze is no longer on you, but something in the distance behind you. Following his line of sight, your puzzled expression turns into one of forlorn.
It was another girl, dressed ironically as a female version of Dracula. You nearly scoffed at the coincidence, though you know it can’t be the costume that’s caught his attention, rather – it’s her blood.
“It’s that time of the night, hm?”
Your question lingers, his focus still caught. You can see the red tint begin to take hold, his grip on your waist tightening into a bruising one. Your heart jumps at the sudden sensation, and it’s only then that Jungkook regains his bearings and gives you a look of regret, his hands parting from your waist instantly as if being burned.
“I’m so sorry, y/n. I just need–,” his nostrils flare of their own accord, hands clenching and unclenching at his sides. He closes his eyes and when they reopen you know for sure the night is over.
They’re blood red. He needs to feed, or risk losing control and slaughtering literally everyone here, including you. And he won’t have that, he refuses to let that happen. He’d sooner throw himself into the sunlight’s blazing rays and turn into nothing but dust than be the reason you die.
For a split second, you almost gain enough courage to tell him to just use you, but you know he’ll say no. He’s never directly stated that you couldn’t be an option, moreso does he just announce when it’s time he needs to leave you to feed. He swears he never kills those he chooses to feed on, having enough control over his emotions and hunger enough to only drink what’s needed and then heal the bite wound with a solid lick of his tongue. After he’s done feeding, he makes sure to leave their body in a safe place until they come to, waking up from what they believe to be just a blacked out moment and they’re on their way back home.
He steps in the direction of the ‘lady of the night’, and your face twists into one of sadness as you say your parting words, doing your best not to slip up as you speak and let the lump in your throat win over.
“Be careful, okay? I guess I’ll—,”you awkwardly looked away and locked eyes with another classmate of yours — Jimin — giving him a tight smile and small wave, before turning back towards Jungkook to finish your statement and are meant with nothing but an empty space.
He was gone.
Surveying the area, do you catch a glimpse of his back, his hand that was once on the small of your back only a couple hours ago, are now on the mystery girl’s as he leads her around the corner and out the side gate, into the night.
“Y/N, hey! Are you by yourself? Want to hang out with me and Yoongi?”
Jimin’s smiling face appears in front of yours. If he notices the way your eyes are rimmed red with unshed tears, he doesn’t comment on it. Just throws a friendly arm around your shoulders to guide you towards his friends. His excited rambling tickles the shell of your ear as he tries to talk over the blaring music, it having changed to a catchy k-pop song that you love cause it reminded you of Jungkook.
The very person you currently wanted to forget, if only for the rest of the night. As you walk up, Yoongi gives you a silent nod in greeting and you reciprocate the action with a small smile.
They don’t leave your side for the rest of the party, and, dare you say, you actually had a good time. The next morning, you realize, maybe too much of a good time.
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blog-name-idk · a month ago
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(Right) Hook, Line, and Sinker
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*Banner by my love @persphonesorchid
Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Fem Reader
Genre: College!AU, Roommate!AU, Fluff, Humor, Smut
Summary: Your horrible friends trick you into going to a haunted corn maze, where you inadvertently punch a zombie. Jungkook is, of course, in love.
Word Count: 12,353
Warnings: Smut
AN: This is the penultimate installment of the Autumn Leaves Collab, which is hilariously the reason I even made a Tumblr. We have one cute autumn-themed fic for each of our beloved boys by some seriously fantastic writers, so please go and check them out! Hope you all enjoy :)
~~~~~
(Right) Hook
It was a beautiful autumn day. The leaves were a gorgeous blend of crimson and gold, the temperature was brisk but not freezing, and the sun was kissing the horizon, setting the entire sky aflame in a blaze of unadulterated glory.
You couldn't have asked for a better day to be backstabbed by your friends. In fact, you didn't have any friends. Just terrible people who promised you donuts and cider and then turned around and forced you into a haunted corn maze.
Your best friend had laughed herself to tears watching your expression change when you caught sight of the sign and realization dawned upon your stupid, trusting brain.
"You betrayed me!" you screeched. Mijin dug the knife in deeper by cackling like the evil witch she was.
"It's your own fault for not looking up the name of this place beforehand," she snickered, wiping her eyes dramatically. You huffed and crossed your arms, sinking into your seat with no intention of getting out. They could drag your cold dead body from the car if they wanted to go into the maze.
"I'll pay for your donuts."
"... Okay."
~~~~~
"FUUUUUUUUUCK THIS!" you screeched, sprinting away from the terrifying clown that had leapt out at your group. Your friends doubled over laughing as you sped off, eager to put distance between you and the most recent jump scare.
In fact, you had been a little too eager to escape, and after a couple twists and turns you realized you were lost. Alone. In a creepy corn maze. While the sun was going down and probably also laughing at your idiocy. Fuck.
For a few slow, spooky moments, you struggled between your pride and your sanity. Should you call Meej and ask her to find you, and deal with even worse teasing later? Or should you just woman up and get through this maze to keep the last remaining shreds of your dignity intact? Suddenly, your phone buzzed in your pocket.
Well, that decided that. You weren't gonna go crawling back to her now. They would find your cold, dead corpse in the morning and she would cry at your funeral and you would sneer at the asshole from your new home in hell. If this wasn't already it.
Meej
LMAO DID YOU SERIOUSLY JUST PANIC LOSE YOURSELF
YOU MORON
LOLOLOL
The wind picked up and you jumped as the leaves of the corn stalks rustled tauntingly around you. Every little echo and noise sounded like another monster sent to get you, and a falling leaf made you jump and put your fists up for a fight. The shadows looked as if they were reaching for you with inky fingers, and you couldn't tell if your shivers were from the bite of the air or the chill in your chest.
In your head, you knew that it was all fake, that anyone coming at you was just a paid actor in makeup and costume. Unfortunately, your cowardly reflexes and adrenaline convinced your body otherwise and you crept through the maze like a very tense, jumpy mouse. You were so intent on the possible danger ahead, however, that you didn't notice someone creeping up behind you.
"Boo." You felt the barest whisper of hot breath on your ear and you froze. Then your body went on autopilot.
"NOOOOO!" you screamed as you automatically whirled to face your attacker. You weren't entirely sure what had happened, but suddenly the knuckles of your right hand were on fire and there was a collapsed zombie in front of you cradling his nose.
"Oh my fucking god," you gasped as you realized what you had done. You crouched next to the poor dude probably earning minimum wage, and rummaged around in your bag. Did you not have any tissues or napkins or anything?
"I am so sorry, are you okay? Wait that's a stupid question, your nose is bleeding, uh, fuck, shit, can I help? Oh god."
Your victim's shoulders began to shake and you panicked more - you didn't mean to make anyone cry for fuck's sake. Shit, who was the real monster here? Then you realized that he was laughing.
"Uh… zombie guy?" you asked stupidly, wondering just how hard you had hit him. He smiled widely at you. Unfortunately, combined with the costume makeup and the blood flowing from his nose, the gesture was not as reassuring as he intended it to be. You appreciated the attempt, though.
"Jungkook."
"Sorry?"
"I'm Jungkook. What's your name?"
You stared at the boy, wondering just what was going on in that head of his and just how hard you had hit him. Because you were raised to be a polite young lady and some of society's training stuck despite your attempts to fuck the patriarchy, you ended up responding automatically.
"I'm [Y/n]."
Why had you said that? Was your first name and appearance enough for him to figure out your full name and sue you? Was that why he had asked? Well too bad zombie conman, joke was on him because you were broke as shit. The safest thing would probably be for you to peace out and make yourself scarce, but you were still worried about the blood dripping from his nose.
"Um, I didn't break it, did I?" you asked timidly as Jungkook got to his feet. He offered you a hand up, which you took despite feeling like you should be the one helping him. His skin was warm despite the fact that he must have been in the maze for at least an hour already.
"I don't think so," he replied, dabbing at his nose with his sleeve and adding real blood to what was (hopefully) just fake decoration. "That was a mean right hook."
"I'm so sorry!" you blurted again, guilt filling you at his words. Wait, you weren't supposed to admit fault out loud if you were getting sued, right? You had watched that in a show somewhere.
"Nah, it was hot."
You blinked at him. Surely you hadn't heard correctly. By the way he was grinning at you - and it was not cute, considering you were now staring at a grimacing zombie covered in blood - you in fact had. This guy was not right in the head, and you began backing away slowly.
"Okay that's great!" you babbled. "I'll-see-you-around-bye!"
With that, you turned and sprinted away despite your protesting legs. You really had to start going back to the gym sometime. If you did, maybe your rusty skills would be brushed up enough for you to defend yourself from this weirdo.
~~~~~
Line
Jungkook stared after you as the moonlight illuminated your fleeing form. Your feet barely made any noise as they pounded through the dirt and leaves, and he found himself even more enamored. You hadn't even given him enough time to tell you you were heading deeper into the maze instead of towards the exit. Well actually, that was probably a good thing. He had to be out here for a bit longer and this meant that you might still be around when he got off.
"Dude, what happened?"
He turned to see Taehyung who was dressed as a creepy clown and, in his opinion, looked way scarier than any undead creature could. Because clowns were real. And they could be anywhere.
"I think I'm in love," Jungkook sighed, unable to keep himself from poking his nose despite the way it made him wince. It was sort of like wiggling a loose tooth, except in this case it was a reminder of the beautiful moment he met his future wife. He was rewarded by his friend's very unimpressed expression, only mildly obscured by the giant red nose on his face.
"With someone who physically assaulted you?" asked Taehyung, crossing his arms and somehow going from creepy clown to bitchy clown. It was amazing what his friend could do with one tilt of his hips.
"I mean I got closer than I was supposed to because she was cute. And then she punched me."
Jungkook touched his nose again with a dreamy sigh as he gazed in the direction you had run off to. What were you doing now? Were you thinking about him as much as he was thinking about you?
"My head rang like a bell. Like wedding bells. Our wedding bells."
Taehyung closed his eyes in resignation, knowing his friend was a goner and probably already picturing your babies sparring with each other. If he was talking about the same girl he scared away from her group earlier, she definitely was pretty enough for any of them to get a little closer than strictly necessary for scaring. He opened them again and scanned his friend just to make sure he was really fine.
"Wait, do you have a boner?"
"She had perfect form, okay?!"
~~~~~
"I fucking hate you," you groaned as you sank down onto the picnic table bench next to Mijin. After what had to have been at least half an hour (the corn maze couldn't even possibly have been that big) of what felt like constant scary clowns and zombies and evil butchers popping out at you, you had finally found the exit. And of course your friends had already escaped and were sitting and eating donuts and drinking hot cider like the assholes they were.
"Yo, what took you?" she asked unsympathetically with a mouth full of cinnamon, powdered sugar, and deep fried dough. "After that clown, no one else showed up. We got done like twenty minutes ago."
"What the hell?" you whined, unceremoniously grabbing your friend's cider and downing it, wishing it had something stronger so you could forget this evening had ever happened. It definitely wasn't because you needed the warmth - you were sweating like a pig from fear and more physical exertion than you had performed in the last month combined. Were you just cursed? Wait no, you did not want your thoughts to go there right after that horrible experience.
And because it just wouldn't quit, Mijin poked your shoulder and pointed to where a familiar looking zombie was strolling towards you in a decidedly un-shambly fashion.
"[Y/n]!" chirped the zombie - Jungkook, was it? - as he waved cheerfully in your direction. Meej raised her eyebrows as you looked behind you and then pointed to yourself in confusion, as if he could have been referring to anyone else. Suspicion began to bloom in your mind.
"Jungkook," you greeted as he came closer, ignoring the curious eyes of your friends. "Do you happen to know the reason I was constantly assaulted by horrifying creatures while my friends here made it through untouched?"
The boy grinned at you, and now that you weren't overcome with hysteria and guilt, you realized that even under his make up his eyes were large and mesmerizing. Wait no, he was a weirdo, why were you noticing how pretty his eyes were?
"Yep," he said unashamedly, his smile widening at your inadvertent pout. "I asked my friends to help."
"I said I was sorry!" you cried indignantly, crossing your arms and scowling at the reason your lifespan had been shortened by ten years. "You didn't have to torture me!"
His eyes widened in surprise, making them impossibly bigger and - dare you say it - cute.
"It wasn't for that!" he protested. "It was so I could catch you after my shift!"
"I - what?" you asked stupidly, now completely bewildered. Jungkook suddenly looked down at his feet, and his voice took on a more hesitant tone.
"I was gonna get a late dinner now, um, will you come?"
Mijin's eyes were now burning a hole into the side of your head as you resolutely pretended neither she nor the rest of your friends existed. What the fuck was going on with your life today? First you got tricked into a haunted maze and now the fucking zombie you punched was asking you on a date?
"Um, it's past midnight," you mumbled, unable to come up with any other response as your brain continued to buffer. The hopeful gleam in those large, innocent eyes did nothing to help. Neither did his adorably bashful expression.
"Okay, early breakfast. On me. Please?" he asked, voice taking on a begging quality. His lip began to jut out in a pout and even under the horrible zombie make up you noticed it was full and plump. "It's the least you can do after you punched me in the face."
At that your friends began to snicker and Meej outright snorted. You felt your own face begin to burn despite the nip in the air. And then your so-called best friend decided to punish you for ignoring her.
"Yeah, she's free," she offered, making you swivel and gape at her second betrayal of the evening. Never one to do anything by halves, she then proceeded to hammer the final nails into the coffin of your friendship. "And she has no plans tomorrow that would make her have to go home early."
"Great!" said Jungkook happily as he and Mijin ignored your indignant splutters. "Just let me get cleaned up and I'll be back here in fifteen."
He jogged away with annoyingly bouncy steps and you whirled on your Brutus.
"What the fuck?" you hissed, ire rising at the smirk on her lips. You opened your mouth to screech at her and she shoved a donut hole into it.
"He's cute," she said conversationally as you chewed hard, determined to give her a piece of your mind. You swallowed, took a deep breath to prepare for your rant, and she stuffed another one past your lips.
"There, there," she said, patting your head as you glared at her, cheeks full of delicious pastry.
"He seems like a nice guy, but keep your location sharing on and if you don't text me every half hour I'll come find you okay?" she said soothingly, patting your bulging cheek. "If it really was something nefarious he'd probably pick a girl who couldn't fight back."
You pouted and slouched in your seat as your other frienemies snickered. Fuck those NPCs. You didn't know them. They weren't even important enough to have names in this universe.
You sulked while you waited for your mysterious zombie boy. Why were you being forced on a sketchy late night date with a total stranger who liked getting punched? Meej continued to feed you donut holes, petting your head and back as if you were a baby. Unfortunately, it was actually working to chill you out because you were an easy bitch.
"Ready?"
You glanced up at the familiar voice, gasped, and immediately began choking on the powdered sugar that flew into your windpipe. Jungkook had removed the zombie make up and clothes, and while he had seemed cute, you hadn't been expecting him to be a total fucking smoke show even with a swollen nose. Fuck location sharing, you would let this guy dismember you and thank him for it. From the way Meej chortled as she handed you more cider, she knew exactly where your mind was at.
"I-uh-yeah," you said suavely, getting up and tripping over the bench as you tried to get out. He moved easily to grab you before you could land on your ass and you felt yourself pressed against a very firm, muscular body.
"You okay?"
Oh no, he was even cuter up close. You gulped and nodded, unable to tear your gaze away from his large, sparkling eyes or his wide smile. His two front teeth were ever-so-slightly larger than normal, making him look like an adorably handsome bunny. Who happened to be ripped beyond belief.
A flash went off and the two of you turned to see Mijin, who was pointing her phone at the two of you. You quickly stepped away from him, wondering if your face was as red as it felt.
"Don't mind me," she said innocently, tucking it back into her bag. "Just getting a picture so if [y/n] goes missing I can give the police a lead. Jungkook, right?"
You glared at her, knowing that while it was kind of true, she probably also wanted to memorialize the stupidly dazed expression on your face. The upside was that the muscle bunny wasn't offended, which gave him points toward not being a Gen-Z Ted Bundy.
"Jeon Jungkook," he told your friend with a grin and a nod. "If that helps."
"Good boy," Meej said approvingly. "Have fun, kids."
She gave your butt a goading slap as you turned to follow Jungkook away, and when you turned to yell at her she somehow managed to throw another donut hole right into your mouth. Maybe she really was a witch.
~~~~~
As you walked towards the parking lot, it hit you that you were about to get into the car of a complete stranger. Granted he was a very attractive, nice-seeming stranger who looked to be about your age and whose full name you now knew, but still. This was what all those old stranger danger videos warned you about. The darkness of the night and the rustling of the leaves did nothing to lessen the creepiness of the atmosphere. As if coming to the same realization, Jungkook turned to you with an uncertain expression on his face.
"There's a Denny's about five minutes away from here, it's the only place still open for food," he explained, pointing his finger somewhere to the east. "You can tell your friend that's where we'll be."
"Denny's," you mused, shooting off a quick text to Meej. "You're a real romantic, Jeon Jungkook."
That bunny-like smile appeared back on his face and you felt your heart give a hop in response as the two of you began walking again. You couldn't tell if it was just because of him or also because you had eaten too many donuts.
"I also make some mean ramyun, but hopefully I'll get to show you another time."
"Hm, that's very presumptuous of you considering you're taking me to a Denny's after midnight," you teased. "Are you just that charming?"
"I hope so," he told you earnestly, the blush that rose on his cheeks doing more to endear him to you than anything else so far. You reached his car, and he gallantly - and cutely - scrambled to open the passenger door for you. When you smiled at him in thanks, he froze and stood at the door, gaping at you like a deer in the headlights.
"Uh… is everything okay?" you asked uncertainly, grin slipping off your face. Jungkook turned bright red and swallowed, shaking his head.
"Y-you're just even prettier when you smile," he stammered, before closing the door and hurrying to the driver's side. You barely heard the slam over the way your blood began to pound in your ears, and a small voice inside of you screamed that this was all way too good to be true and you were about to get murked. Another voice, one that sounded suspiciously like Meej, told it to shut the fuck up. Mijin had the unfortunate (or fortunate) habit of always being right, so you decided to listen to that one instead.
Jungkook still seemed flustered as he got into the drivers' side, which was absolutely fucking precious. It relaxed you further despite the awkward silence that descended as the two of you tried to figure out what to talk about.
"So… was that clown also your friend?" you finally asked, remembering the recurring horror that had kept you lost in the maze for so long. Jungkook grinned and nodded, though he quickly turned his eyes back to the road.
"Yep, that's Taehyung. Honestly I think his costume is the scariest," he confirmed, and you shuddered in acknowledgement.
"Yeah, zombies and werewolves and stuff aren't real. But clowns are, that makes it worse."
"EXACTLY! See, you get it!"
The awkwardness between you dissipated as you began to banter back and forth more comfortably, and you found yourself laughing outright more often than not. As it turned out, not only was this zombie boy a confusing mixture of sexy and adorable, but he was also funny and kind. You had a feeling you weren't going to come out of this night alive, but for entirely different reasons than you had initially expected.
The easy conversation continued through your late dinner/early breakfast, and you found yourself enjoying talking to him even more than the greasy eggs and bacon on your plate. He was just so sweet and cute, it was impossible not to like him.
As the food dwindled, you found that you didn't actually want this night to end. You realized you were growing increasingly enamored with this strange boy, but you weren't sure if he felt similarly after actually having a conversation with you.
Well, you were a strong(ish), independent(ish), woman who knew what she wanted, right? You were a twenty-first century girl! All you had to do was be brave and be the one to ask for his number!
You took one look at Jungkook's handsome face and sparkling eyes and decided no, you were not a brave, strong, independent woman. He was way too attractive for you to be able to grab life by the proverbial ovaries and just straight up ask him out. You let out an internal sigh at your own cowardice, then eyed the table where his right hand was idly drumming the edge of the forgotten menu. Do it, bitch, whispered the Mijin-voice in your brain.
Steeling yourself, you set your own hand on the table and crept it forward until it brushed against his own. He stopped talking mid-sentence and froze, then pulled his hand back as if he'd been scalded. His eyes were so wide it would have been comical if your heart wasn't currently sinking in your chest.
"Uh, I have to pee," he stammered, before bolting upright and almost running to the bathroom. You sat there, stunned and humiliated. That had actually been worse than just hearing no. What should you do now? Stay here and be awkward? Call Mijin and have her come get you?
Before you could fully make a decision, a beautiful guy who was decidedly not Jungkook plopped down into his seat. Another equally gorgeous boy sat in the empty space next to you, giving you a bright smile that squished his eyes into adorable crescents.
"Hi! I'm Jimin!"
~~~~~
"Why are we doing this again?" complained Jimin from the passengers' seat as Taehyung followed the car in front of them. "I'm tired, I want to go home."
"Because," said his best friend, "we all put enough effort into Kookie getting this date and he better not fuck it up."
"Wait, with that girl you told me to scare away from the exits?" he asked, suddenly interested. He sat up a little straighter in his seat. "She was super cute."
"Yep, and now I'm invested and I want to see how it goes."
They both sighed a little when they followed Jungkook's car into the Denny's parking lot. It made sense, it wasn't like there was anything else open or around, but still. Denny's? Taehyung parked far enough away that it was unlikely they'd be noticed, but when Jimin went to follow you and Jungkook inside, he tugged him over to the windows instead.
"Seriously?" he asked incredulously, staring at his friend in disbelief. "This is literally the creepiest thing we could be doing, and that's saying a lot considering where we work."
"I'm not hungry," Taehyung replied with a shrug, crouching behind a bush to hide his form from the parking lot. Jimin rolled his eyes but followed suit. When Tae got like this, it was usually better to just humor him.
"Man, she's really pretty," said Jimin, trying not to think about the fact that he was currently admiring a girl through the window of a Denny's while hiding in a bush. Surprisingly, the date actually seemed to be going well - you were laughing, Kookie was laughing, and you were smiling more often than not.
Honestly it was beginning to get boring and Jimin was feeling more and more like a stalker. And watching the two of you eat an absurd amount of eggs and bacon was starting to make his stomach grumble. He was cold, tired, hungry, and it didn't seem like things were going to get interesting any time soon.
"Can we go yet? I think he's doing fine."
As if on cue they watched as you tried to touch his hand and, in true Jungkookie fashion, their friend panicked and ran away. Taehyung gave him a pointed 'I-told-you-so' look, which Jimin ignored as he got up and dusted himself off before heading towards the restaurant doors. If Jungkook was too scared to properly flirt with a pretty girl, then his hyungs would just have to show him how it was done.
~~~~~
"Hi! I'm Jimin!"
"Uh, I'm [y/n]," you replied automatically, before cursing yourself for giving your name to a stranger for the second time that night. Should you be worried? Weird things definitely tended to happen when you sat alone at a Denny's after midnight, but they usually involved alcoholics or tweakers, not beautiful mystery men. Well, maybe they were alcoholics or druggies and it just hadn't destroyed their systems yet.
Seeing the trepidation on your face, the other boy gave you a reassuring grin that simultaneously relaxed you and made your face warm.
"I'm Taehyung. We work at the maze too. We - er - we came here to get some food, and recognized you."
A lightbulb went off in your head when he said his name and you gaped in shock. What the fuck? The creepy murder-clown was secretly also a hot guy? Was everyone that worked at that maze secretly a supermodel? They both laughed and you realized you had said the last bit aloud.
"That's really sweet of you," said Jimin, scooting a little closer to you with a twinkle in his eye. Despite the fact that he had probably been outside scaring people all night, he still smelled quite nice. "I'm not aware of that being a prerequisite, but if it is you'd definitely be a shoo-in."
You felt your face flush bright red at the compliment, but luckily you didn't need to respond because Jungkook chose that moment to return. He looked incredibly pissed, which was honestly pretty hot. And confusing. If he wasn't interested anymore, shouldn't he be relieved to have a distraction?
"What are you guys doing here?" he asked flatly, crossing his arms as he eyed the way Jimin was crowding your space. You were clearly flustered, and the way Jimin was looking at you made his jaw clench in irritation.
"We just wanted to get some food," said Jimin innocently. He smiled at you again and inched even closer, pressing his muscular thigh against yours. "But now that I'm here, I think I'm more in the mood for dessert."
Suddenly his warmth was gone and you realized that Jungkook had picked his friend up by his armpits like a dog. The effortless way he lifted him had you eyeing the stretch of his jacket across his biceps, and you recalled just how firm his body had been earlier. He deposited Jimin next to Taehyung with an uncaring thwump and sat next to you, right where his friend had been. His thigh was just as firm as Jimin's, and you felt your chest go fluttery at his proximity.
"Can I get you guys anything else?"
The tired looking waitress sighed when she saw the two new additions to the table, and while they ordered, Jungkook turned to you with that bright smile.
"Did you want anything?" he asked softly, leaning in closer so you could hear him. You were incredibly confused. First just a brush of your hand was enough to send him fleeing, but now he was sitting in your space and looking at you like you were the only person in the room. Maybe he really did have to pee that badly and you had bad timing? Either way, you wanted to prolong this time with him.
"Um, I could go for a milkshake," you replied, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear and trying not to stare at how close his lips were to your own. "I don't know if I can drink a whole one though."
"We can split one!"
Jimin's voice broke through the small bubble that had enveloped you and Jungkook, and you looked across the table to see a cherubic smile on his face. You didn't know him well enough to know that this was actually his shit-eating grin, and you also didn't see the knives Jungkook was currently hurling out of his eyes.
"No way, she's gonna share one with me," he protested with an annoyed huff, before turning to you again and looking uncertain. "I mean, only if you want to."
Fuck, this boy was way too cute. You were getting an enjoyable whiplash from the way he switched between being possessive and shy. You nodded, unable (and unwilling) to resist the hope glimmering in his eyes. You gave your order to the waitress, who had started tapping her foot impatiently - not that you could blame her - and brought your attention back to the table.
"So you really punched our Jungkookie in the nose?" Taehyung asked, leaning forward to rest his elbows on the table. The full force of his attention amplified your embarrassment and you covered your face with your hands.
"Wait, what?" chortled Jimin, reaching across the table to tousle Jungkook's hair. The former zombie scowled and flicked his friend in the forehead, and the two began to stage an odd over-the-table battle. You slumped further in your seat.
"Your hand looks bruised, let me see."
Warm, gentle fingers pried your own off your face as Taehyung pulled your hand closer to inspect your knuckles. You fought down the urge to shiver as he brushed his thumb across your skin, and the small smile he gave you - more of a smirk, really - made your cheeks heat up.
"He's hard-headed for sure, but it doesn't look too bad," he said with an unfairly attractive arch of his brows. The hint of a smolder in his dark eyes made the gesture seem more suggestive than it should have, and you swallowed hard, unable to look away. "Want me to kiss it better?"
All of a sudden, your hand was back at your side, but now enclosed in another warm grip. You looked at Jungkook in surprise, though you couldn't say you weren't pleased at his attention. He laced his fingers through yours, and you marveled at how perfectly your hand fit into his.
"Leave her alone, hyung," the boy said with a glare, rolling his tongue against the inside of his cheek. You hadn't prepared for how hot that looked, or what it did to your insides, and your cavewoman brain short-circuited at the action.
"Are you going to kiss it better then?"
Oh fuck, you had said that out loud. You watched the glare evaporate off his face as he whipped his head to stare at you, then your joined hands. You could almost see steam coming out of his ears as his brain buffered, and your insecurity began to re-establish itself. Until he pulled your hand up to his face and brushed his full, soft lips against your skin, making you shiver.
Your own lips parted slightly in surprise as you stared at him, fully aware that your heart was pounding and your skin was tingling. His own dark eyes looked back at you, and the intensity in his gaze made you wonder if perhaps he wasn't so innocent after all.
"Is that better?" he murmured against your skin. You nodded, momentarily mute, and his happy smile took your breath away. In a burst of courage, you leaned forward and planted a soft peck on his nose.
"Just returning the favor," you said with a shy grin, ignoring the "ohhhhhhh nice one" from Taehyung. The dazed look on Jungkook's face was definitely worth it.
"You know, I think I cut myself shaving this - "
"Shut the fuck up hyung, you grow like five hairs."
Jimin's offended expression made you laugh, and some of the embarrassment you felt at the two other boys witnessing your awkward fumbles with Jungkook dissipated. His grip on your hand tightened as if taking ownership, which set your silly, weak heart aflutter. You relaxed a little further once Jimin's food arrived and he focused his attention more on eating than on sending you flirtatious glances. Until the waitress brought your milkshake.
"What flavor did you get?" asked Taehyung interestedly, eyeing the tall glass with poorly concealed mischief.
"Um… cookies and cream…?" you ventured with a frown, considering the coloring made it pretty obvious. Taehyung's cheshire grin widened, and from the corner of your eye you saw Jungkook's ears turn pink.
"Oh, do you like cookies?" asked Jimin, having been lured away from his pancakes by the promise of being able to tease his friend. You glanced between the duo, feeling like you were missing something.
"Uh… doesn't everyone?" you asked. Jimin chortled in glee at your response and you spared a peek at Jungkook, who looked resigned and annoyed.
"Well our Jungkookie here is the sweetest of all, wouldn't you say?" said Taehyung with a shit-eating grin. "And his cream-"
He was cut off by a stream of milkshake hitting him in the face. Jungkook glared at him from beside you, straw to his lips and pointed straight at his friend. You and Jimin burst out laughing at the shocked expression on Taehyung's face, and you couldn't help but want to rib him back for how much he had been teasing Jungkook all night.
"Well tell me," you drawled, "how does his cream taste?"
Jungkook choked from beside you, and Jimin laughed so hard he fell sideways into his friend's lap. Taehyung just grinned and wiped some with his index finger, then held it out to you.
"Why don't you see for yourself?" he countered, recovering from his surprise impressively quickly. Your jaw dropped in surprise, and as if he took it as an invitation, he brought his finger closer.
Only for Jungkook to lean forward and lick it clean instead. Which was not hot. Definitely not.
"Thanks, hyung," the boy said with zero expression on his face while Jimin gasped for air. You were actually starting to get concerned for his lungs. "The ice cream was good, tasted like there was some bullshit mixed with it though."
"Maybe Taehyung should take his head out of his ass," you said without thinking, then blushed when you realized you had acted as if you were with Meej and the rest of your friends. They were just so goofy that you had gotten too comfortable, too fast. You needn't have worried though, because Jimin had fallen to the questionably clean floor under the table and Jungkook was staring at you with an even dopier grin than when you had punched him.
"You're amazing," he breathed, making you blush even harder. To avoid having to respond, you took a large slurp of your milkshake, then sighed in contentment.
"Kookie, you invited her to the Halloween party already, right?" asked Taehyung, eyes amused. He clearly wasn't offended by your remark, and that helped you relax again. Especially because Jungkook took that sparkling gaze off of you to scowl at his hyung. His attention was making you feel too many things.
"I was going to, before you showed up," he complained, and you fought down the smile tugging at the corners of your mouth at how cute he sounded.
"Oh please, you ditched a pretty girl alone at a Denny's after midnight before we showed up," retorted Jimin, who had finally recovered and was running his hand through his hair to fix it. You couldn't help but giggle at the way Jungkook's plump lower lip began to jut out in a pout, and you squeezed his hand in reassurance.
"So what's this about a party?" you asked him, chest tingling at the way he immediately perked up and turned back to you. His eyes were so large and bright that you were left momentarily breathless.
"My roommate and I are having a Halloween party this weekend," he explained, looking adorably hopeful. "Um, if you're free, would you want to come? You're welcome to bring some friends if you want."
"If you give me your number, I can - OW!"
You suppressed another giggle as Jimin glared at Jungkook, who had not-so-subtly kicked him under the table.
"I'd love to," you replied, ignoring the two older boys. Jungkook's face lit up brighter than the moon outside, and you unlocked your phone and handed it over to him so he could enter his contact information.
He pouted a little when you did deign to get Jimin's and Taehyung's numbers as well, though he snickered when he saw that you named them TweedleJim and Taedledum. They did tone down their aggressive flirting - slightly - but by the time everyone had finished eating and paying, you wondered how purple the older boys' shins were going to be tomorrow. There had been a lot of kicking from your irritated date, and he had decidedly muscular thighs and calves.
"It was great meeting you," said Jimin as the four of you left the restaurant. The mischievous cast had returned to his face, and he pulled you into a hug that lasted far longer than necessary and only ended when Jungkook shoved him away. Taehyung didn't hug you, but instead took your hand and pressed his lips on your knuckles right where Jungkook had.
"Can't wait to see you this weekend," he said with a wink and throaty chuckle as the youngest ripped your hand away. He stomped towards his car, towing you behind him, and you gave a half-hearted wave to the two monkeys sporting identical grins behind you. You had to half-jog to keep from falling over, but the way Jungkook's cheeks were puffed out ever so slightly was too cute to be annoyed with.
Despite his irritation, he still opened your door for you, and your insides melted further. When he entered the driver's side, you took a moment to admire his pouting profile as he started the car. Then you grabbed his right hand, tracing the skin of his knuckles with your thumb.
"Jungkook, you know I think I like you a lot, right?" you asked, smiling at him. It was a little embarrassing to say aloud, but he seemed like he needed the reassurance after being teased by his shameless friends all night. His large eyes widened in surprise and a slow smile began to consume his face.
"Yeah?" he breathed, eyes shining as he looked at you. You noticed he had a cute mole under his lower lip.
"Yeah," you confirmed softly, gazing back at him and feeling your cheeks warm. You weren't sure who moved first, but then his soft lips were pressed against your own. The kiss was sweet, sweeter than the vanilla still lingering on his lips, and you sighed in contentment as you tangled your fingers in his baggy shirt to bring him closer. He complied, letting his own hands cradle your cheeks gently.
Then twin thuds sounded from either side of you, and you broke away to see Jimin and Taehyung grinning from opposite windows. You screamed in horror and clung to Jungkook before realizing who the fucking idiots staring at you were, and Jungkook swore under his breath.
"I'm going to murder them," he hissed as you laughed weakly and pressed a hand to your pounding chest. It had gone from butterflies to straight up heart attack far too quickly for your preference, and you whole-heartedly supported his statement.
"I'll help," you offered with a scowl as the two idiots gave you cheeky waves and scampered off to a different car. "Do you have an extra shovel?"
"Oh, I couldn't let you do physical labor like that on our first date," Jungkook replied innocently and you smiled in spite of yourself.
"But Denny's and getting harassed by your friends is fine?" you countered, though you placed a chaste peck on his cheek to show you weren't actually bothered. Despite the fact that you had literally just kissed, his cheeks flushed.
"We'll do something better next time," he promised, and your heart fluttered at the casual way he said it. Still, you couldn't help but give him a little shit.
"What makes you think there'll be a next time?" He whirled to look at you, eyes wide, and you began to giggle.
"That wasn't nice," he complained, that adorable pout making its way onto his face again.
"I'm sorry, what can I do to make up for it?" you teased, eyes flicking back down to his lips. He grinned and leaned forward, but a loud honk from what was presumably Taehyung's car startled both of you again.
"Let's get you home," he groaned, leaning back in his car. You laughed and took his hand, twining your fingers with his as he drove out of the parking lot.
"I mean, I doubt they'd follow us all the way to my place…" you said, brushing his hand with your thumb. Jungkook drove a little faster.
~~~~~
Sinker
"You think I should've put a shirt on under this?" you fretted as the Uber driver pulled into the parking lot of a decently sized apartment complex. Mijin rolled her eyes as she adjusted the halo atop her cow onesie, which was the exact opposite of yours in terms of being revealing.
"You're the one trying to seduce a guy who's clearly already gone for you," she deadpanned, making you flush.
"We just met a week ago! How would you know?" you protested, checking the tape keeping your robe semi-decently over your chest for the hundredth time since you'd entered the car.
"I've read your texts, they're disgusting," she said fondly. "He texts you good morning and good night every single day with hearts and everything, it's pathetic."
"I think it's cute," you said defensively, making her laugh and ruffle your hair.
"That's because you're just as whipped as he is."
"Be nice to me," you warned. "Or else we can go back and you won't get to meet any of his hot friends."
"Bitch I'm the one who agreed to come in case this is secretly an enclave of hot serial killers."
"Er, not to interrupt, but is this the right apartment?"
You both looked at the Uber driver, who you had completely forgotten about, then at the building outside.
"Yep, thanks! Sorry about that," you confirmed, opening the door and hopping outside. You shivered in the cold and mentally cursed yourself for going the hot girl route instead of the sensible funny costume route. Then again, you had goals for tonight that hopefully involved a cute ex-zombie between your legs.
As soon as Meej got out of the car, you nodded to the Uber and scurried up the stairs to the proper apartment. Even without knowing the apartment number you could've guessed which unit was the right one from the music pulsing in the air.
You opened the door cautiously, not really knowing what to expect, and a wave of warm air and bass blasted out at you. There was a decent amount of people in the room, and you stepped inside with Meej in tow.
"So where's your man?" she asked, trying to scan over the sea of heads. You shrugged, also looking around to see if you could find him.
"You made it!"
You turned to see twin gorgeous boys wearing togas and wreaths, and smiled despite knowing they were probably up to something already. Mijin outright ogled, and you couldn't really blame her.
Jimin was a vision in white, with a golden belt bearing a sun motif and a laurel crown. Combined with his smooth, pale skin, he nearly glowed. Taehyung wore a green toga, with silver moon adornments and a small toy bow-and-arrow. It played wonderfully with his tanned complexion, and you stared for a moment despite being preoccupied looking for Jungkook. They were already gorgeous before, but in their costumes they truly personified the Greek gods they were dressed as.
"Hey guys," you greeted, but before you could introduce them to Meej they grabbed both of you and all but dragged you further into the house. You sighed internally. It appeared that their antics were already in motion.
~~~~~
"Where is she?" Jungkook complained from his seat on the couch as he pouted into his plastic cup. He had been daydreaming about seeing you again since pretty much the second he had dropped you off that fateful night. The two of you had made out for an inordinately long amount of time in your parking lot, and he had driven away with a happy heart and a raging boner.
Between that right hook, first date, and the constant texts you'd been exchanging throughout the week, it was safe to say he was completely enamored. Not only were you scrappy, but you were gorgeous, funny, and nice, and talking to you just felt right. And amazingly, you seemed to feel the same way. So where were you? You said you couldn't wait to see him, so why weren't you here yet?
Jimin chortled at his younger friend's expression, patting his head like a child. Which he definitely looked like considering he was sagging in his seat in a cookie monster onesie.
"She'll be here," Taehyung assured him with a grin. "If not for you, then for me."
Before Jungkook could respond to his obnoxious friend, a slightly slurred, high-pitched voice came from his side and he winced.
"Jungkookieeee!"
"Uh, hi Dina," he said with a polite smile at the girl dressed as a slutty cookie. So this was why she had pestered him to know what his costume tonight would be. He looked around for help, but of course his two friends had oh-so-mysteriously disappeared in his time of need.
The sound of the door opening drove Dina out of his mind, and his gaze shot hopefully towards the entryway. It was hard to see, but there you were with that friend who had forced you to go out with him that night. He needed to remember to thank her for that. She would probably be the maid of honor at the wedding.
Even from halfway across the room, obscured by other partygoers, you were so pretty he wanted to die. Had you somehow gotten cuter since he had last seen you? He shot up immediately, not even noticing that Dina had been trying to sit on his knee, and she was sent toppling to the floor.
"Owww," she whined despite not looking like she had hit anything. Jungkook sighed in frustration. He really did not want to deal with her right now, not when you were right there, but he wasn't an asshole.
By the time he had helped her up, made sure she was fine, and pried her clinging acrylic talons off his arm, you were nowhere to be found. With an annoyed scowl, he realized that neither were Jimin or Taehyung. His eyes narrowed. They wouldn't.
He found you in the kitchen, sipping a drink and being caged against the counter by Taehyung. Jimin was engaging your friend, who looked more amused than charmed. Your expression was decidedly patient, which soothed Jungkook's ruffled feathers somewhat despite the way his hyung was staring at you like the hunter he was dressed as. Then he got a full view of your actual costume.
He had thought he couldn't be any more attracted to you, but you had proven him wrong. You were wearing a silky boxing robe tied tightly over some criminally short shorts that revealed a very appealing amount of leg. Your knuckles were wrapped in athletic tape, and his nose and his dick twinged at the same time. You were perfect.
Jungkook would have taken more time to admire you, but Taehyung was way too close, and currently playing with the hem of your robe. Something in his brain growled mine.
Then the older boy tugged you towards him by the tie of your robe and Jungkook went on autopilot, striding forward and ripping you away from his hyung. He opened his mouth to yell at Taehyung, until he realized he was holding you and his hand was touching warm, bare skin. He looked down and you stared back, mouth open and face pink. He looked further down and realized your tie had gotten undone. Your breasts were somehow still covered, but it was completely obvious you were wearing nothing underneath. His brain short-circuited.
Jungkook stood there, frozen and gaping, for an embarrassingly long amount of time. Then your friend surreptitiously stomped on his foot, and he came back to his senses. He was not about to let his hyungs see you like this.
You gave a squeak as he scooped you into his arms, clinging to the front of his onesie in a way that he quite enjoyed as he strode wordlessly out of the kitchen. He didn't even see Dina, who he almost trampled into crumbs in his haste to get you away. He quickly made his way to his room and shut the door behind him with his foot.
"Um, Jungkook?" you asked timidly, looking up at him with wide, confused eyes. He froze again when he realized what he had done, and that your robe was still untied and revealing a tantalizing amount of skin.
"S-sorry," he stammered, trying and failing to not ogle at the expanse of skin revealed by the cascading fabric. "I just… didn't want them to see…"
Your lips began to twitch up into a smile, and you brought your arms around his neck.
"Oh?" You asked softly, voice almost a purr. The look in your eyes made his heart stutter and his dick twitch. You brought your lips to his ear, and your hot breath sent a pleasant shiver down his spine. "And why's that?"
You licked the shell of his ear, tongue warm and wet, and something in him snapped. Jungkook tossed you into his bed, and crawled over to trap you between his arms. The flash of worry that he was going too far vanished when you grabbed the front of his onesie to pull him down and crush his lips against yours.
"Because," he said as he pulled back, slightly breathless. You were a vision below him, splayed out and licking your lips as you stared up at him with hooded eyes. "You're mine."
He saw your mouth begin to curve into a smile before he was on you again, hot and hungry and demanding. Your lips slotted against his perfectly, and the whimper you gave when he sucked your lower lip between his teeth added more fuel to the heat blooming in his abdomen. You evidently felt the same, because you wrapped your legs around his waist to bring his hips against yours, making you both gasp as his erection rubbed against your clothed core. Despite the tickle of his costume, it sent arousal flooding through you.
"O-oh, Kookie," you moaned as he turned his attention to the line of your jaw, planting soft kisses and nips until he reached the juncture of your neck and shoulder. Then he began to suckle harshly, making you gasp and tangle your fingers in his hair encouragingly. If his hyungs couldn't keep their hands to themselves, he'd just have to show them who you belonged to.
His hands skated across your bare stomach, making you shiver, until they came to rest at your covered breasts. Then he sat back, looking perplexed.
"Why isn't this moving?" He complained, tugging lightly at your robe. You burst into giggles at the confusion on his face.
"It's boob tape," you explained, and laughed harder at his uncomprehending expression. "It's basically double-sided tape for clothes. Did you never wonder how girls wear drapey stuff without nip slip?"
"I just thought it was some weird boob magic," Jungkook responded sheepishly, and you dissolved into giggles again.
"You're cute," you said between chuckles, then gasped when he ground his hips down hard against you.
"Cute?" he asked darkly, making your mouth go dry. He proceeded to peel the robe off your chest - luckily the tape stayed on the fabric and not your skin - and his gaze went molten. He stared long enough for you to begin to squirm beneath him, and you brought your arms up to cover yourself. His own shot out to grab your wrists and pin them on either side of your head.
"No, let me see you," he demanded, and the pure want in his voice went straight between your legs. His eyes raked over you like hot coals, the heat in them bringing a pretty flush to your cheeks.
"God you're so beautiful," Jungkook whispered reverently before descending again to devour you. You moaned into his mouth, wrists straining half-heartedly against his grip, and he took the opportunity to part your soft lips with his tongue. He licked into your mouth in hot strokes, and your thighs tightened around his hips in an effort to bring him closer. The whine you let out as his cock rubbed you through your shorts made him even harder, and he broke away from your mouth to trail wet kisses down your jaw and your neck. This time, he went past your collarbone to suck bruises that bloomed red and purple on the skin of your chest.
"Jungkook," you moaned breathily, trying to control yourself despite how good he was making you feel. The way he was pinning you down so easily despite how shy he had acted at the beginning was doing a number on you.
He paused to give you a boyish grin at complete odds with the way he was making your pussy clench, before dipping his head to roll your pert nipple around his tongue. Then he sucked hard and you keened, arching into the warm wetness of his mouth.
"Fuck, touch me please," you begged, desperate to feel his hands on you. His eyes darkened further and that innocent grin turned wicked.
"Anything for you, baby," he promised, and the pet name turned you on even more. He released your hands to explore your soft curves, and yours immediately went to the buttons of his adorable but currently unappreciated cookie monster onesie.
You were able to make quick work of them despite the distracting way he was nipping your neck and pinching your nipples, and you forced him backwards so you could shove the upper part of his costume off his frame.
"Oh, fuck you," you groaned when you got a full blast of his glorious body. Jungkook smirked as you ogled his abs, no trace of that stumbling boy left in his dark eyes.
"I mean, if that's what you want," he teased, preening under your gaze. You wanted to roll your eyes, but they were still glued to the hard ridges of muscle on prominent display.
"Shut up and take this off," you grumbled, shoving his onesie further down his waist. "It's tickling me."
Jungkook grinned impishly at you before obeying, and when he kicked his costume to some random corner of his room you sighed in a mixture of arousal and despair at the way his muscular thighs flexed. He was just so perfect, and by the size of the bulge straining against his boxer briefs he was going to be just as perfect there too.
You grabbed him by the shoulders and yanked him back down to smash his lips against yours again, not particularly caring that this kiss was much sloppier than prior. By the way Jungkook groaned against your mouth when your tongue skimmed his, neither did he.
It was even headier now, with his toned chest pressed flush against your breasts. You ground your hips against his with a breathy whine, raking your nails lightly down his back. When you squeezed his ass - yes, it was just as firm as you'd hoped - he bucked forward, driving his cock harder against you. You briefly wondered if you were soaking him through your shorts, then decided you didn't care.
When you began to wiggle out of your shorts, shy Jungkook made his appearance again. He pulled back, eyes wide, though he couldn't stop himself from licking his lips.
"A-are you sure? I was just… kidding," he said, as if you couldn't see his dick leaking through his boxers and you weren't half naked on his bed and begging for his touch. It was cute, but this sweet Jungkook wasn't what you wanted right now. So you pouted and began to push yourself off the bed.
"Fine, then I'll go see if Taehy-oof!"
Your gamble was rewarded as you were immediately forced back onto the bed, Jungkook's hard eyes blazing above you.
"I said you're mine," he growled, giving your nipple a hard pinch. You yelped at the mixture of pain and pleasure, and felt yourself grow impossibly wetter at the edge in his tone. You threaded your hands in his hair to bring him down for a kiss, but he paused, lips hovering over yours. "You're mine, right?"
Despite the aggressiveness of his actions, there was a hint of pleading in his tone, and you couldn't help but smile as your heart fluttered.
"Only if you're mine too," you replied, making his eyes light up. Jungkook had been yours since you had delivered that knock out punch to his nose heart. He closed the distance eagerly, and you lost yourself again in the heat of his lips and tongue. When one of his hands found its way between your legs, he groaned at how damp you were even through layers of cloth.
"Yours," you murmured, rubbing against his hand shamelessly. His eyes flashed and before you could process what was happening, your shorts and underwear were ripped off and you were bare beneath him aside from the robe halfway off your shoulders. His hand went back and you moaned as his fingers dragged along your wet folds before changing course to start rubbing light circles on your clit.
"You're so sexy," Jungkook groaned against your mouth as you bucked your hips forward, chasing the friction. He pressed his middle finger into you, and the sound that you made was almost enough to make him explode then and there. You were so hot and wet and tight around him already, and if you felt this good around a finger he couldn't wait to feel you around his dick.
You licked sloppily into his mouth, rutting against his hand as he pumped his finger in and out of you and swallowed your whimpers. When he added a second finger your breath caught in your throat, nails digging into the skin of his back.
"J-Jungkook," you gasped when he began grinding the heel of his palm against your clit while rubbing his fingers against your walls. He was working you up embarrassingly quickly, and when your orgasm hit it almost took you by surprise. Your body went rigid as waves of pleasure shuddered through you, and Jungkook hissed and pressed wet kisses all over your neck, working you through your high as your walls spasmed around his fingers.
"Wow," was all you managed when you came back to reality. It was partially due to the orgasm, but mostly caused by the beauty of Jungkook's flushed face and disheveled hair hovering above you as his hungry eyes drank you in. You tugged him towards you by his hair and kissed him hard for a moment before pushing him back a little and giving him your best seductress eyes.
"Fuck me now, please," you said sweetly, in a husky voice you were surprised came from you. Jungkook's eyes somehow went even darker and he almost dove to the side of his bed to open his nightstand, retrieving a condom he ripped open in record time. You giggled a little at his eagerness. Until he kicked his boxers off. Dicks were always objectively funny looking even at the best of times. So why did his make your mouth water?
"Is there anything about you that isn't sexy?" you said in a half grumble, making him laugh as he rolled the latex over his tantalizing length. He hovered over you, one hand by your head and another on his cock as he lined himself up, and you reached up to thread your fingers through his silky hair. He smiled down at you, eyes bright. Then he rubbed his tip against your folds and you moaned, tightening your grip.
"If it makes you feel better, everything about you is sexy too," he breathed, eyes filled with a mixture of adoration and lust as his lips fell to capture yours. All you could do was gasp against his mouth as he began to press his cock past your aching folds. Despite how wet you were, it was still a slow, excruciatingly delicious stretch, and he cursed, hips stuttering against yours.
"Fuck, you feel so good," he groaned, thrusting lightly in and out to coat himself further in your wetness. The feeling was definitely mutual, and you wrapped your legs around his waist to encourage him to go deeper. When he bottomed out, you both stilled for a moment to get your bearings, though he wasn't sure how much good it did him with you quivering beneath him and your walls hugging him so tightly.
"Please move," you finally whimpered when you couldn't take it anymore, giving a little buck of your hips that had Jungkook hissing. His lips crushed yours again as he began giving slow, measured, pumps that had you arching your chest against his hard pecs. He was glad he'd made you cum once because he didn't really think he was going to be able to last very long. Though that didn't mean he wasn't going to try again.
So when he angled his hips a certain way and you cried out and clenched around him, he maintained that position despite the way his thighs protested. He kept one hand on your waist, locking you in place, and brought his other to rub his thumb lightly against your clit.
"Oh fuuuuck," you groaned, head falling backwards Jungkook worked his magic on you. You were usually content if you could get on top and rub one out with a guy during sex, but this boy seemed determined to ruin you for anyone else and the worst part was that you wanted him to. He was hitting all the right spots and doing all the right things as if you'd been having sex for years, and between the thick drag of his cock and the attention he was giving your clit, you were hurtling towards the edge a second time.
"God, do that again," Jungkook groaned, and you hazily wondered what he was talking about, unable to think past the delicious way he was pounding into you. You didn't realize you were pulling his hair, and when the coil inside you snapped again you gave another hard tug with a desperate whine.
He fucked you through your second high, shuddering at the way your already snug walls squeezed him like a vice. The sounds he was forcing out of your throat were too much, and he felt himself starting to lose it.
"Fuck, [y/n], I'm gonna cum," he cursed, pace growing uneven even as his thrusts became harder and deeper. To his shock, panic, and disappointment, you pushed him off of you and onto his back. Then you ripped off the condom and engulfed him in the confines of your greedy mouth and he gasped, hips stuttering against you.
"Fuckfuckfuck," he choked, spilling himself down your perfect throat as you swallowed around him. Even after he was done, you kept swirling your tongue around his length as he moaned and let his head fall back against his sheets. You gave a little suck that had him whine and thrust against you despite the oversensitivity before you pulled back, looking way too innocent and cheerful for what you had just done.
"Taehyung was right, your cream's pretty good," you said with a wink, and he felt his entire neck and face go red.
"Oh my god," he complained, tackling you back down onto the bed and holding you against his chest as you giggled and wrapped your arms around him. The two of you lay there, snuggling and enjoying the post-coital haze.
"Jungkook?"
"Hm?" he asked a little sleepily, opening his eyes and blushing at the cute way you were looking up at him.
"Did you mean it?" You looked sheepish, and he woke up a little more.
"Mean what?" he asked in confusion, and you flushed, looking uncertain. He brought his hand up to stroke your cheek, trying to reassure you even if he wasn't exactly sure what he was reassuring you about.
"Um… about me being yours. And you being mine," you mumbled shyly, avoiding his eyes. He felt his heart swell at the pink rising on your face, and he couldn't keep the stupid lovestruck smile off his face.
"Of course I did," he replied, holding you tighter and smushing your face into his chest. "You're my girlfriend now, you can't escape." Your muffled laugh was music to his ears, and you hugged him back just as hard until you finally pulled away, complaining you couldn't breathe.
"Okay, boyfriend," you said, eyes sparkling happily. He was elated that he had been the one to put that expression on your face. He was less elated when you began to clamber out of bed after kissing him on the nose.
"Nooo, stay here," he pouted, then tried to pose on the bed in an enticing manner.
"I want to, I really do," you told him ruefully as you blatantly eyed his abs. "But I can't just straight up ditch Mijin when I begged her to come with me."
"Oh yes, the maid of honor," Jungkook said with a nod, mollified by how disappointed you actually sounded. You looked confused for a moment before your attention was drawn by your robe.
"Ah shit, the tape isn't sticky anymore," you grumbled as you futilely slapped the fabric against your chest. Jungkook was momentarily mesmerized by the way it made your breasts jiggle before shaking himself out of his daze.
"I'll wear it, and you can wear mine," he suggested eagerly. It wasn't quite the same as seeing you in his clothes or anything, but it was close. You shrugged in agreement, slipping off the robe - which should not have been as arousing as it was when you were already basically naked - and tossing it towards him as you padded around the room to grab your shorts and the onesie. Jungkook stared at your ass for several enjoyable seconds before going to his dresser to grab some basketball shorts.
"This is… kinda big."
He turned around and felt himself torn between laughing and melting into the floor. You had put on the cookie monster onesie, which was sized for him, and were almost drowning in it. You had rolled up both the sleeves and the legs multiple times and yet it still looked hilariously large on your smaller frame.
"You look perfect," Jungkook promised, making your face flush that pretty pink again. Though you frowned when you looked at Jungkook, who was now wearing basketball shorts and your boxing robe. "What's wrong?"
"I… don't know if I want people seeing how hot you are…" you grumbled, eyes glued to his six-pack. Jungkook's heart fluttered when he realized you were jealous, and he grinned at your adorable pout. He strode up to you, enjoying the way you licked your lips when he cupped your face.
"How do you think I felt seeing Taehyung all over you?" he demanded, making your eyes widen before he bent down to capture your lips. Feeling you melt against him was enough to rile him up all over again, but when his hands began to wander you pushed him back a little.
"Fair enough," you replied breathlessly, sounding incredibly reluctant but firm. "Let's go."
You resolutely marched to his door and pulled it open, only to run into a very irate, very drunk cookie.
"Uh…" you began awkwardly, not exactly sure what this chick was doing here.
"Jungkookie, who is she?" the cookie wailed, pointing at you with a venomous glare. You would've felt more worried had Jungkook not looked so done with his life. He came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist, resting his chin on your shoulder.
"This is my girlfriend, [y/n]," he said, shooting her point blank with the truth. By the way she reeled backwards, it might as well have been a real bullet. Jungkook took the opportunity to usher you past her, lock his door, then take your hand and tug you to the living. You were impressed at the speed in which he had done everything, and wondered just how many quick escapes he had to make from that girl.
"Nice costume."
You turned to see Mijin, Taehyung, and Jimin smirking at the two of you. A fourth extremely beautiful man had wandered somewhere near the vicinity and brightened when he saw you. Despite the pig nose and the blanket he was wrapped up in, he was still impossibly tall and handsome and broad. This had to be the last super hot guy in Jungkook's friend group, right? It was just impossible for there to be more.
"Oh! Are you Jungkook's mystery punching girl?" he asked cheerfully, seeing you with Jungkook. You blushed at the descriptor, and Mijin chimed in before you could.
"I'm Mijin," said your friend as she shook his hand, utterly unfazed by his weirdness. Well, he was a fucking dime so you supposed you couldn't blame her. The man beamed, making his eyes sparkle.
"Yep. It was love at first fight," she said with a grin, and you rolled your eyes at the terrible pun. To your surprise, the new guy's jaw dropped and he stared at your friend in wonder. Then he elbowed Jimin away from her and held out his hand with a charming smile.
"Then it's meant to be, because me Jin!" he said proudly, pointing at his wide chest and ignoring the way Taehyung facepalmed beside him. Meej chortled, giving his costume a very obvious once-over as Jin snickered at his questionable wit.
"Are you a pig in a blanket?" she asked, clearly vibing with her very handsome, very lame suitor.
"Holy cow! You got it!" Jin said cornily, and you heard Jungkook groan at the guy's terrible joke - considering Mijin's costume was exactly that. A cow with a halo. Unlike the rest of you - including a now pouting Jimin - your friend smiled widely.
"Yeah, can you believe [y/n] told me my costume was lame?" she asked indignantly, making Jin gasp in affront.
"They tried to say the same thing about mine!" he complained in commiseration, and the two of them cast peevish looks at the rest of you. You and Jungkook made eye contact and despite the short time in which you had known each other, you knew exactly what he was thinking. What the fuck is happening?
"Uh… we're gonna get drinks…" said Jungkook slowly, backing away from the two farmyard animals. He took your hand again and the two of you fled the scene, once again almost trampling a bawling Dina.
"That's just the way the cookie crumbles," you heard Mijin remark from behind you. All you heard after that was a weird squeaking, as if someone needed to replace their windshield wipers.
"Jungkook, is it weird to say that those two together scared me more than that maze?" you whispered loudly as he handed you a beer. He shook his head and stared behind him, shuddering.
"To never being that fucking corny," he pledged, holding his own bottle out. You nodded and clinked yours against his and took a much needed gulp. Then, unable to resist, you leaned in to kiss him. It ended up lasting much longer than you had intended, and when you pulled away he had a dreamy smile on his face. "I guess it'll be nice if the best man and the maid of honor are together though."
"What?"
"Nevermind."
Jungkook distracted you with another mind-melting kiss, and by the time he released your lips, your legs were jelly. He noticed the way you were clinging to him and grinned that sweet smile at you before easily picking you up and setting your butt on the counter.
"Better?" he asked, nestling himself between his legs and tilting his head up to look at you upside-down. You giggled and leaned down to give him a peck, then stroked through his hair with your free hand. The two of you watched the party from the relatively quiet confines of the kitchen, where Meej and Jin where getting increasingly close and Jimin was now attempting to avoid the advances of a sad cookie while Taehyung laughed his ass off on the sidelines. It was odd how easily things had come together when you were the last person who would ever willingly enter a haunted corn maze.
Jungkook snuggled his head under your chin and you smiled, wrapping your arms around him and letting your hands rest on his bare sides. Who would have thought getting lured out of the house by the promise of donuts would lead to so much more? You knew Mijin would use this as an excuse to drag you out to more activities, but when Jungkook nuzzled your shoulder you found yourself more excited than chagrined. Fall might be ending, but your time with him was just beginning.
~~~~~
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katebacks · 3 months ago
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All Mine - JJK (M)
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→ pairing | Jeon Jungkook x Reader
→ genre | smut, angst, ceo!jungkook
→ word count | 6,431
→ summary | CEO of one of the biggest companies in the country,
Jungkook didn't have much time for love. You were in love with him,
but he didn't feel the same way about you, at least that's what you thought.
→ warnings |sex, Adult content, alcoholic beverages, low slang words.
→ A/N| I've been away for a long time, but I'm slowly coming back now. I haven't come off hiatus yet, but it's a start. Please, if you like it, reblog and comment, I'm always open to suggestions.
You knew it was wrong, but it was something you couldn't avoid. From the day you laid your eyes on Jungkook, you had fallen madly in love, but always knew he didn't feel the same way and probably never would. He was cold, impatient and sometimes mean. Well, maybe most of the time he was mean, that was his nature and he made that very clear when you went on a date for the first time.
Despite being a gentleman, he wasn't romantic at all, he wasn't a man of flowers or romanticism.  He could open doors for you, he could pull out your chair for you to sit in, he could buy you gifts and expensive things, but he would never say those three words that most human beings expect to hear. And at first you were fine with that, but after a year in a relationship that was seemingly without commitments and feelings on his part, you were feeling tired. Tired of wanting him to spend the night at your apartment , tired of receiving diamond necklaces the mornings after sex as compensation for him not staying. You were tired of being treated as just an object, as something to satisfy his sexual desires, and mostly tired of him trying to control your life completely.
Jungkook was the president of a pharmaceutical company, the most successful in the country, which was on its way to winning the Academy Award for Global Entrepreneurship. So he was almost always busy, signing contracts, leading new research, traveling on business, so you only saw each other 6 times a month.  Sometimes he decided at the last minute that he would take you with him on a trip, forcing you to undo your commitments and ignore your duties for weeks, and even though you didn't have a job, since your life seemed to revolve only around him, with him paying all your expenses, including putting an apartment in your name, you attended business administration college, and you had exams and assignments that you did with your friends. That's why you always ended up getting on bad terms with your friends for missing your college dates, but you never got a bad image to the university itself, because since he started dating you, Jungkook started donating millions of dollars to your college.
But about the trips, you never complained about it. You visited Paris, Italy, Switzerland, Dubai and several other countries. During the day, you went out and got to know the city you were in, you went to the tourist spots, met new people, ate the native foods, but you always did it yourself, all alone,  because he was always busy with his business meetings, and only saw you at night, in his room.
You also had nothing to complain about the sex. It was always full of lust and madness, goosebumps and sweat. His hands went against the sensitive points of your body and your hands gripped his muscular arms. When you had your chest against the mattress, and he was on top of you, hitting you hard from behind, you would squeeze the sheet between your fingers, and he would caress your arms, bringing his hands to yours, intertwining your fingers. When you were on top, riding, the sweat pouring down your neck, strolling between your breasts, until it dripped onto Jungkook's defined abdomen, you held onto the headboard, using all your strength to do it faster and faster. As he held your waist, pressing his fingers against your skin, his eyes glued to your wet body, the moans echoing through the room, the bed creaking, he cursed as he felt himself coming, gripping your body, sitting on the bed, using the strength of his arms to keep you still on his lap, while you felt his hot liquid spurt into you, the pleasure taking over your body, and you were delirious, coming on his dick.
Then you fell down on the mattress, he pulled you into a hug until he felt that your breathing had normalized, and that your body had stopped spasming. He would get up, get his clothes and not even shower, just kiss you good night and walk out the door of your apartment, leaving you too tired to even try to stop him. And then it would take him days to respond to your messages or call you for yet another overwhelming night.
You were just tired of this bullshit.
You had enough money in the bank to support yourself for months, even years if you lowered your life quality  a little bit and stopped buying so many expensive things. And if you needed to, you had real diamond necklaces, earrings and rings that you could sell for a good price, as well as exclusive brand clothes, shoes and bags. You worked before you met him and your old boss assured you that if you wanted your job back, you would have it. There was nothing that could stop you from getting your freedom back, and meeting other people, having a loving relationship with someone else, other than the fact that you were totally heads over heels in love with Jungkook.
"So, are you coming to celebrate Minho's birthday with us tonight?" Rosé asked as you walked across campus. She was your age and in your class, she was also your best friend and shared everything with you, just like you did with her. She had a body to be envied, buttery brown, caramelized, as she liked to say. Her light pink hair shone as she walked and drew stares, compliments and sighs. She wasn't exactly the easiest person to deal with, she had the strong spirit, the strongest personality and that's why you admired her so much. As long as you had known each other, you had never seen her cry for any man, quite the contrary, it was men who cried for her. And she was the only one of your friends who knew about Jungkook.
"Yeah, I can't even remember the last time I had something with alcohol. I need to drink and go wild."
"Your Sugar Daddy won't let you drink.” She laugh.  “I highly doubt he'll let you hang out with us, anyway. Doesn't he hate you going out without him? So bossy, gosh."
"He's not my Sugar Daddy." You protested.
"Oh no? So what do we call a rich old man who pays everything for a young girl? Philanthropist? Good old man?"
"He's thirty-two. He's only fiveyears older than I am, he’s not that old.” 
Rose rolled her eyes.
"Well, he's not your boyfriend, so..."
"Anyway, we're not hanging out anymore." You shrugged. "The last time I saw him was almost two weeks ago. Since then he hasn't called or texted, and I haven't tried to get in touch either."
"Have you finally come to your senses and realized he wants nothing more than sex with you? And that he will never want to get married or have children?" She asked stopping in her tracks and grabbing your arm, causing you to stop as well. You just shook your head and nodded, a tear starting to run down your cheek, even though you fought so hard to hold it back. Rosé hugged you and stroked your back.
"I just wanted to understand why he can't love me. Am I that bad? Am I so stupid that he didn't even want to spend time with me to get to know me? Am I only good for sex?"
"Don't say those things, this guy is just another asshole in the world and he doesn't deserve you to spend your expensive foundation on him. Not even if he paid for it."
That comment made you laugh through your tears and be grateful for having Rosé by your side.
"Come on, let's pick out our clothes for tonight. Let's dress as slutty as possible, and oh, Minho has a crush on you. Maybe tonight you should use him to forget about Jungkook."
...
You were just getting dressed, wearing  a short, low-cut black satin dress, and high heels of the same color. You chose to pull your hair into a high bun, leaving your shoulders exposed.
You were just putting on your earrings when the doorbell rang. And you shivered all over. Usually, the doorman called to let you know that there was someone in the building who was asking permission to go up to your apartment, and the neighbors almost never stayed home as they were always traveling for work, so there was only one option of who was at your door.
You held yourself still, hoping that if you didn't make a noise, he would leave, but a few seconds later you heard the electronic lock being unlocked and the door opening. It was Jungkook. He always rang the doorbell first before entering the apartment so he wouldn't scare you. But still, you were scared as fuck. He never came to visit you without telling you first. Something was wrong, and you could sense it.
"Princess, are you home?" You could hear his voice coming from the living room, as you heard his footsteps in the hallway, probably heading towards your room. That was it. There was nothing to do. You simply went back to looking at yourself in the mirror, finishing putting on your earrings, remaining calm. When he entered the room, he stopped pacing suddenly, frowning at your, not expecting to find your like this.
God, how wonderful he was. He was all in black, wearing casual clothes, with his suede shoe. His brown hair tossed back, and his scent invading the room. He carried a bottle of wine, a Romanée Conti Grand Cru in one hand while his cell phone and apartment access card were in the other. You looked at him in the mirror, waiting for him to say something, but he continued to stare, relentlessly. You turned to him, his eyes falling on your shoulders and cleavage, for a few seconds he remained there, just looking at you, until he finally seemed to come to his senses and raised his gaze to yours, still frowning.
"Why are you dressed like that?" He asked in a serious tone, the kind he used when he didn't like something. You looked at yourself for a few seconds before turning your attention to him.
"Why? Isn't it good?"
"You look absolutely gorgeous." He exclaimed without hesitation, bringing a stupid smile to your face."Did we have anything scheduled today?" Jungkook looked at his rolex, trying to remember if he had forgotten any appointments he had made with you that night.
"Hmm, no." You said, still unsure what to say. Jungkook raised his head, again looking towards you with a frown. You bit your lip and turned back to the dressing table behind you, opening your jewelry drawer and looking for a necklace. "I'm going out with some friends today." And so you chose one that had only one cut diamond pendant in the shape of a heart. Jungkook had given it to you for your birthday, two months after you started hanging out.
“What friends?” You didn't even have the courage to look at his reflection in your mirror as you heard his voice getting angrier. But you couldn't understand why. He'd said himself that there was nothing between you, so why did he seem so upset?
“Some college friends. It's one of our classmates' birthday today and Rosé invited me to go with them to a pub downtown.” And that was it, you were ready to leave.
"Okay." he almost whispered. "And why didn't you tell me?" He asked putting the wine bottle on top of the dresser that was next to the door, and shoved his hands in his pants pockets. You shrugged and turned to him, who still had that confused, troubled expression on his face.
"You didn't call or text, you just... disappeared for almost two weeks, I thought you'd finally found a new sex toy and had forgotten about me. I was just moving on."
And so you walked past him, heading to the closet and looking for something. Jungkook blinked a few times until he finally understood what was happening and turned towards you, who was wearing your jacket.
"Is there something you want to tell me, (y/n)?" He never calls you by your name, only when you were in a fight or about to get into one. And you didn't feel like fighting at all, because you knew that every time, you ended up in bed, and he ended up leaving, as usual. You just sighed, fighting the urge to start cursing and jumping into his arms, and just grabbed your keys and your cell phone off the nightstand next to your bed. When you turned to him again, he remained motionless.
"I don't have anything to talk to you about, Jungkook. Like you said, we're just two adults having no-strings-attached sex, I don't owe you any explanations.” You didn't even know where you got so much strength to say that. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going out with my friends. If you want to stay, make yourself at home, if not, don't forget to lock the door when you leave."
When you walked out the apartment door, you felt like you could finally breathe again. You weren't afraid of Jungkook's reaction, you knew he would never do anything violent or dangerous to you, but you knew he was quite possessive of his stuff, and you knew he thought you was his. And to be honest, you knew you were his, you felt like his, but that had to change, you had to get over it. You wanted a family, children someday, and you knew he didn't want something like that. He wasn't the right man for you.
It didn't take long for your taxi to arrive, and by the time you boarded, Jungkook still hadn't left the building. Maybe he would stay there a little longer, maybe he would wait for you to come back. But you would try not to worry about it.
When you arrived at the pub, Rosé was outside, waiting for you to arrive. You had already been to that place once, Jungkook was the one who took you and there you’d stayed in the VIP area. It was quite an experience counting that you had sex in one of the bathrooms.
“Ready to forget that asshole?”
No, you weren’t
“Yeah, I am.”
But you could pretend it.
...
The night was moving really slowly, you had like three or four drinks, and had a bunch of strangers hitting on you like they know you. The songs were good and you even danced some with Rosé, but it was weird to be in a place like this without Jungkook shielding you from the others. You always felt safe when he was close to you, but even with your male college friends hanging around, you couldn't let go, for fear that one of those weird guys that was hitting on you might decide to do something. Being a woman wasn't easy, but being a woman in the middle of a pub full of drunk men and possible predators was even harder. And you hated it. You hated misogyny in society, you hated feeling like a targed, and you hated feeling so dependent on Jungkook.
"Is everything alright?" Minho's voice sounded close to your ear, making you look over your shoulder and see him standing right next to you. He was a tall, handsome man with black hair and an athlete's physique, he was polite and kind, and he loved children. He would be your perfect match if there wasn't an asshole on your mind.
“Yeah, I’m just tired.”  You smiled. “So? Having fun?”
"Oh, I don't know. Sometimes I think I've lost the ability to have fun at parties that start after 8 pm." He said scratching the back of his neck. "I guess I'm too old for these things."
"Don't say that, you must be tired of studying and working so hard." You said taking a sip of your drink.
"But what about you? You don't seem to be enjoying yourself either." He sat on the bench next to you, turning to face you, his arm resting on the counter, very, very close to you, so close that his hand almost touched yours that that covered the glass on the counter, preventing anyone from trying to put something in your drink.
"No, I'm having fun." You lied. "I'm just really tired, it's been a long week."
"Well, yeah, Rosé said you've been pretty busy with some personal projects. And to be honest, I've always been really curious about what those projects were, or if you were actually just dating someone and didn't want anyone to know." He gave a wan smile. "But she assured me that you didn't have a boyfriend and that you were actually looking for one."
You laughed humorlessly. Rosé, i’ll kill you. You thought.
"It's like her to say something like that."
"Look, I'll be really straight, I know we're not that close, we are both always busy and we hardly see each other at university, but you know, I kind of have a crush on you, and by crush I mean I'm dying to be more than your friend." You felt your cheeks burn, but couldn't stop staring into his eyes, which gave him enough confidence to go on. "And if you give me a chance, I think I could make a great boyfriend. Not that I'm saying we're going to start dating right on the first date." He chuckled sheepishly, and you thought that was so cute that you couldn't contain a shy laugh either. "I'm really bad at these things, sorry, I'm not very good at hitting on a girl." He cleared his throat, glancing around. "Anyway, I think we should dance, to see if this embarrassing moment can be broken."
"That would be a good idea, but I kind of don't like dancing around all these people, there are a lot of men here and I don't like the idea of a strange man trying to rub himself against me.”
"They are not going to touch you." He said smiling, reaching out to you. "I won’t let them." You bit your lip, thinking for a second. You needed to take a chance on whatever it was, only then would you be able to forget Jungkook. Or at least begin to try.
You smiled and nodded, reaching your hand towards him, but before you could even bring your fingers into Minho's palm, a huge male hand wrapped around yours, making you turn around to see who it was, your eyes widening when you saw Jungkook looking down to you. And what surprised you the most at that moment was not the fact that he was there, but the soft look he had.
"Forgive my tardiness, princess." He said smiling, bringing his face closer to yours and giving you a kiss on the forehead, leaving you even more in shock. "Kyle and I got stuck in a huge traffic jam." Kyle, the man almost as tall as Jungkook, dark-haired, dressed in a suit, who was standing two steps behind him, was his private security, his bodyguard. There was nowhere Jungkook went that Kyle wasn't together, except of course, your apartment. You didn't talk much, usually he was very quiet, and polite, he greeted you and that was it, he was silent for the rest of the time.
“You must be the birthday boy, I suppose. I hope I got here before you blew out the candles.” He turned to Minho who had a confused look and still had his hand extended towards you. If it had been on other occasions, you would have caught the sarcasm in Jungkook's words, but at that moment, you were still trying to process that he was still holding your hand.
On the other hand, Minho seems to have understood very well what he meant.
“(y/n), there you are... Oh my god what is the steel giant doing here?” Rosé came out of the crowd that was occupying the dance floor, and just like you, she widened her eyes when she saw him.
"I'm sorry, but who are you?" Minho asked, putting his hand down. A smile appeared on Jungkook's face as the sparkle in Minho's eyes faded.
"I'm Jeon Jungkook, (y/n)'s boyfriend." He simply said. The two girls looked at each other, still wide-eyed, mouths agape, while hissing ‘oh my god’ without making a single sound.
"Wow, you really do have a boyfriend." Minho laughed dryly. "I don't... I thought... Rosé told me you didn't have anyone... I didn't want to... You should have told me." 
You just wanted to curl up and hide from all that embarrassment. You didn't even know you had a boyfriend, how could you tell others that you had one?
“No, no, no, she doesn’t have a boyfriend, he’s lying.” Rosé intervened, making everyone look at her. Even Jungkook frowned at her. "If she had a boyfriend, she would have said it, wouldn't you (y/n)?" 
You wanted to say something, but you didn't know what. Luckily, Jungkook always had an answer for everything and saved you the shame of making up a blatant lie.
“We kept our relationship a secret for some time, I didn't want her to be disturbed by onlookers or reporters. I didn't want our personal lives to end up on the cover of a magazine.”
“What, you’re like famous or something?” Rosé questioned, crossing her arms in a very arrogant and petulant way.
"I'm just Hanmi's CEO."
"You mean the Hanmi Enterprise?" Minho asked totally shocked. Jungkook nodded. "Like, the biggest pharmaceutical company in the country?"
“Yes.”
"Oh my god sir, I swear I didn't know (y/n) was your girlfriend, I would never do anything...” And he started freaking out. “My god, the Hanmi Enterprise is every business administration student's dream in this country, the internship project that you have is just amazing."
Rosé rolled her eyes and grabbed your hand.
"While you guys sit there sucking each other's balls, (y/n) and I are going to the bathroom."
And she started pulling you towards the bathrooms. The moment you were inside, she turned towards you and slapped your arm.
“Ouch. Why did you do that?”
“Why did i...What the hell were you thinking of calling the Iceman, Olaff's creator, to come here?”
“How many drinks did you have? Elza is the creator of Olaff, not the... Ouch, stop hitting me.” 
"If you didn't invite him, then how the hell did he... Oh my lord. " And she covered her mouth, her eyes widening. "Do you think he implanted a mini tracker in you while you slept?"
“He didn’t do that, Rosé.”
"So he's tracking your phone, what a freak."
"He doesn't..." You took a deep breath. "Rosé, he's a partner at this nightclub. I've come here other times with him, one of his friends must have called and said I was here."
"Why didn't you tell me that when we arrived? I could have chosen another place."
"I didn't know he would come after me, at least not after the short conversation we had before I came here."
"What conversation?" She asked stopping to go around in circles. "I thought you guys weren't talking."
"And we weren't, but today he showed up at my apartment by surprise, all…perfect, holding a very expensive bottle of wine. I said I was going out with some friends, he asked why I didn't tell him, I said I didn't owe him an explanation, and I left."
"Oh, so I know exactly what's going on here, he's trying to show that he's the alpha male, and that you can even say you don't owe him an explanation, but still, you belong to him."
"Well maybe I do."
"I can't believe you're saying this." She said, in disbelief. "Have you forgotten how he's been treating you all this time?"
"Look Rosé, he never promised me roses and hearts, I always knew he didn't want a serious relationship, but you saw what he just did, he declared in front of other people that he's my boyfriend. That has to be worth something." You said throwing your hands up. "I think perhaps I should give him one more chance."
The girl was thoughtful for a few seconds, until a smile that you knew well appeared on her lips.
“I know this face, what are you up to?”
“I thought of a great way to test your Sugar Daddy.” And so she walked towards the door, while you rolled your eyes and followed.
"He's not my sugar daddy." And when they opened the door, they both came face to face with Kyle, the bodyguard, who was standing in front of them. “Kyle, what are you doing here?”
"What do you think? The old man told him to come after you. So controlling.” Rosé complained.
“Mr Jeon asked to let you know that he and your friends are in the VIP area, and that he is waiting for you there.” Kyle said simply. Rosé just sighed and headed in a direction opposite to the VIP area. “Is your friend all right, Miss (y/l/n)? Need something?"
"No, she's fine, you get used to it with time."
After climbing the stairs that led to the VIP area, (y/n) noticed that the two sofas were almost full, there was only one vacant seat, on a loveseat sofa and was right next to Jungkook. He was engaged in conversation with the other guys, and they were probably talking about politics and his company. Deciding you should drink some more, to process everything that was going on, you headed to the drinks counter and sat there, ordering a margherita for the waiter.
It didn't take long before a hand went to your waist and Jungkook sat down beside you.
"So... Steel giant, huh?"
(y/n) looked at him for a few seconds before taking a sip of her drink.
"Don't think about it too much, Rosé is 5.25ft tall, anyone is a giant for her."
"She doesn't seem to like me very much, you must have spoken very badly about me." He said nodding to the bartender that already knew what his drink would be.
“I only told the truth. It's not my fault if you're the bad guy.”
"I'm not the bad guy, only when you ask me to be." He whispered the last part. At other times it would turn you on, but at that moment, you weren't in the mood for it. Then you swiveled around on the bench, facing him.
“Look, why are you here anyway?” You asked. “Why did you come to tell my friends that you're my boyfriend when you really aren't? Have you come to show that you own me?”
“To be honest, it made me jealous to death that you could be getting hooked up with other men, and that possibly at one time or another, you would fall for one of them.” He said staring at Minho while he was talking to his friends. “And I could have sworn you were falling for that guy.”
“And what do you have to do with it, Jungkook? It was you who said that..."
"I know what I said, princess, and I was wrong."
And he made you gawk.
“Were you?”
"Yeah." He nodded. "Look, I'm not good at this, and I'm trying to change my behavior with you because you deserve so much more than a guy like me and I want to be someone who deserves you." He sighed. “Today I received the best news I could receive in the business world. And the first thing I thought of was you, I thought how much I wanted to share this news with you and how important you are to me. So I went to your apartment with that wine. I thought it was about time I had a conversation with you about my feelings, about why I was so…cold.”
"Well, you can tell me now." You said still not believing what you had heard.
“No, it's a conversation we should have alone. And I don't want to stop you from having fun with your friends. In fact, I just want you to know that I don't think of you as a toy, I know my actions so far just said that, but I swear that's not how I feel about you." He said getting up and approaching you, hovering over you, holding your face. "I just wanted you to know that..."
"(y/n)!" Rosé's voice caught your attention, and you turned to the side, seeing your friend running towards you. “Come with me, now!” And so she grabbed your arm, taking it from Jungkook's hands, who just sighed and sat down again, watching you walk down the stairs until you lost sight of you.
"What's it?" you asked, your voice not loud enough to override the loud music in the room. You were being pulled into the crowd, on the dance floor in the common part of the Pub.
“You will dance with me. Our special Have Mercy choreography.”
"What? What are you...”
“I'm going to prove to you that Jungkook doesn't deserve a second chance, that he's controlling and that the moment he sees you dancing sensually among this bunch of guys, he's going to drag you out of here. Because that's what shit men do, they fuck women up, he takes away your freedom and ends your life. Trust me."
"Rosé, he's not like that."
"Oh no? Then dance with me and prove me wrong."
When CHLOE's voice invaded the place, Rosé started dancing the 'special choreography' they had created in their freshman year of college, when they met and became best friends. It was something sensual and provocative, and one that would surely attract the attention of both sexes there. Praying that no strangers would try to grope you, you started dancing with your friend.  
You weren't the best dancer in the world, but you always liked to dance, it made you elastic and it was a great exercise for people who, like you, didn't like working out. Rosé had a lot more waddle, she could wiggle her hips a lot better, and she created all the choreography. And if she didn't like what she studied in college so much, she'd probably be a dancer.
And the highlight of the choreography, in your opinion, was when you wiggled your ass, keeping your legs straight and lowered your torso, touching your fingertips to the floor, and then you went up at once, throwing your hair back, and lowered yourselves. at once, as if you were actually going to sit down.
“(y/n) and Rosé are killing it.” One of the friends from the university who was in the VIP area said, making the others look over the railing, to the dance floor below, seeing the two swaying among the other people, attracting several looks.Jungkook approached the protection bar, holding a glass of whiskey and watched you, who tossed your hair, went down and up, made provocative movements and was attracting a lot of attention.
He looked at Kyle who got the message and just waved his hand, calling out to the other security guards who followed the boss to the common area dance floor.
Jungkook looked around, seeing the amount of men who were watching you too.
“Bunch of pervs. Kyle" He called, not taking his eyes off his girl.
“Sir?”
"Don't let any man touch her."
"Yes sir." And so Kyle led the security guards who, one by one, barred any man from approaching the two girls in the middle of the dance floor who with your dance, now infected other girls who danced sensually around them. Jungkook started walking in circles, slowly, around the girls, eyes glued to you. In his mind, several scenarios were happening, several memories were reproduced and the fire that burned in his chest, only seemed to burn with even more intensity.
When herealize that a man managed to avoid the security guards and enter the circle, and that he had his eyes and even his hands raised towards you, Jungkook quickened his pace, slipping between you and the boy, looking him up and down, his gaze cold and intimidating, not needing anything else for the boy to back off.
At the end of the song, you and Rosé celebrated and only then looked around, seeing that the security guards had made a kind of barrier, leaving the men out and the women in. You both looked towards Jungkook who was beside Kyle, looking at you with a smug smile on his face as he shoved his hands into his pants pockets. You can't help but smile.
"I told you." You turned to your friend who looked nothing less than impressed.
"He literally pushed every man in this pub away from you, just to let you dance." She laughed. "Yeah, that's pretty cool."
You walked towards him and let him hug you by the waist.
"Do I need to do anything else to prove how important you and your happiness are to me?" You looked around, biting your lip, trying to think of something. The whole situation, the dancing, the display of power, made you aroused and you could feel that you were wet, so when you saw what you wanted, you turned to him and leaned on his shoulders, bringing your lips to his ear.
"I want you to fuck me on those tables over there." You said pointing to the darkest corner of the pub, where literally no one was sitting, as they were more interested in dancing and getting high than sitting. Jeon let out a groan and tightened his hands on your waist, starting to push you towards the tables, he never backed down on a challenge and was always willing to fuck anywhere you were comfortable with.
Minutes later, you were at one of those tables both in the dark. You were kneeling on the floor under the table. He had his pants open and his cock was in your hand. You moved your soft hand over him as your mouth sucked on the top, making Jungkook grunt and grab your hair, moving your head according to the pleasure he was feeling. And with every movement you made with your tongue, he pushed your head harder until you swallowed his whole dick, being able to feel the bottom of your throat, moving his hips against your mouth, fucking your throat until you are out of breath and patting his thigh, making him let go, watching the saliva run from your mouth to the middle of your breasts, making him even harder with that sight.
He cursed - his words were not heard because of the loud music. He reached into his pocket, pulling out a condom. He ripped the package open with his teeth as you stood up and had your back to him. As soon as he put a condom on his cock, he grabbed your waist and pulled you onto his lap,pulled your panties to the side and let him position his cock at the entrance to your dripping pussy. You slowly sat up until you were full of him, your walls getting used to the size he was. You spread your hands across the table, slowly moving your hips back and forth. Jungkook threw his head back, hitting the club wall, cursing as you slowly rolled on his lap, lust taking over his body, totally at your mercy. He used to be the dominator in bed, but he would never lie about the fact that if you asked, he'd drop to his knees for you, his princess. He got so weak when you moved like that.  He cupped your waist, pressing his fingers into your skin, in an almost silent request for you to move faster, and you did, riding his cock with ease.
And between moans and curses your chest was against the table, Jungkook was standing behind you, one hand resting on your back while the other held your waist, hitting hard from behind. His grunts and groans of pleasure were totally masked by the electronic music that was now blaring from the speakers. No one there had noticed the madness they were committing, and if they did, no one cared. His cock hitting the right place, making you roll your eyes and grab the edge of the table while you bit your own lips, feeling your pussy tighten around him, your core so hot and so tight, it hurt.
"Fuck." You grunted as you felt orgasm reaching your body, as he increased the force of the blows, now pulling your arms, making you stand, your ass lifted against his hip, one of his arms hugging your waist, while with the other hand he grabbed your throat. He bit down on your shoulder, sucking on your skin as he slammed his cock against your pussy. “Fucking hell, fuck.” He hissed as he came. His cum filling the condom and he in the midst of his delirium of pleasure, he wished he was filling your pussy with his cum, imagining how pleasurable it would be to see his cum running down your legs after he filled you.
He collapsed sitting on the seat, taking the condom off his dick and zipping his pants while you adjusted the dress and hair. He pulled you onto his lap, sitting you sideways on his thighs and hugging you, letting you lay your head on his shoulder, closing your eyes and resting.
"We should go home." He whispered to you, who just nodded, too tired to speak. He then got up with you on his lap, carrying you out of the club, and to the car, where Kyle took them to your apartment.
And for the first time, Jungkook slept with you in your bed.
all rights reserved © katebacks | 2018/2022 — no reposting and/or modifying of any form on any medium is allowed. no translations allowed.
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kooksbunnnn · 3 months ago
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Birthday Bumps - Jungkook
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My masterlist
Summary: it's his birthday and you decide to make it special. Giving him the gift that he asked you months ago.
Warnings: Basically edging. Consent is sexy. Unprotected sex (don't do it people). Dom Jungkook. Sub oc. Crying in pleasure? A little bit of dirty talk. Orgasm control. Squirting. Fluff in the end:)
Words: 4.2k 
Rating: 18+
Notes: my first fic hehe. Please show some love:)
The need to see you or touch you or kiss you was making jungkook go crazy. He hasn't seen much of you since he kissed you in the morning, but now, thinking of the things he might or can do to you is making his dick ache.
Opening the door, the dim lights coming from the bedroom catches his eye instantly since the whole apartment was blacked out. It must be the new lamp you bought on your study table to work late at night without disturbing his sleep.
Although he had no problems with you working in full lighting but you insisted because 'you work so hard all day, its not your fault I get ideas for the projects at night baby'.
That's what you said while scribbling what seemed like a diamond choker sketch. You were good at what you did but he believed you should take breaks too. He has noticed the symptoms of bags under your eyes which you try to hide from him. It's not that he feels you might look unattractive or something but he is worried.
The chain of thoughts he is having is broken by soft pads of foot coming towards him, he notices a shadow in the light on the wall against the door, but his eyes flicker automatically to you when you appear in-
Fuck.
You're wearing a short, silk, maroon-colored robe, long enough to hide his favorite place to shove his face in but short enough to make him salivate.
He takes a step forward making you take a step back, keeping eye contact he closes the door behind him, making you gulp. He notices you biting your inner lip, a nervous trait you have.
The pain his dick felt when he entered the apartment is nothing to what he feels now. He needs to control himself because if he gives in you might not be able to sit without wincing every second the next day.
"Hi baby." the low rasp makes you feel a shiver and you flinch when you realize the room has ended and you are trapped between him and the closet door.
"Hey" you breathe shakily when his shoe-clad feet touch your bare ones, realizing how less the distance is between you two.
Its been three years since your marriage and he never fails to make you nervous when up close. His musky plus vanilla like scent, the boyish yet so mature facial features, his big eyes that look too dangerous as of now, the big muscles on his shoulders and back that you always dig your nails in while he pounds you into any possible surface.
And when you feel how hard he is, a whimper leaves your lips and you get shivers at the thought of what you might be getting into by what you're going to gift him.  
"Is this my birthday present, princess?" he asks in a whisper next to your ear and you clutch the material of the shirt he is wearing to compose yourself but then he licks the skin behind your ear, and your knees buckle.
You shake your head and he pulls his head back to meet your eyes, he tilts his head in a questionable way that says 'then?'
You take put your hand on his jawline, carresing it and smiling when he kisses your wrist. "I want you to edge me, kook." you whisper.
At this he visibly pauses then slowly meets your eyes, jaw clenched and you could actually see his eyes darken. Your breath hitches when his hand grazes the robe over your left thigh shifting it to the side, tracing soft circles on the flesh.
"Don't mess with me, Y/N." he says leaning in.
"I'm not." You barely whisper before he squeezes the flesh of your ass making you moan with your eyes shut. He curses at the lack of the usual silk under your robe and drops his forehead on your shoulder, sighing.
"Fuck." He chuckles breathily with no visible humor, sending shivers down your spine. The way he breathes heavily makes your breathing uneven too and you could almost hear your heartbeat in your ears.
His other free hand comes up to your face, grazing your cheek, while both of your hands are still clutching his shirt.
You try to rub your thighs together very subtly to relieve some kind of tension but him being very observant, puts his knee in between your legs rubbing the place you wanted the most.
"Kook-" you let out a breathy moan which turns into a bit louder one when he flexes his thigh muscle. "Did you really think I'll even let you do as much as rub yourself?" Chuckling, he grabs you by your jaw and turns it towards his face.
"Only I can make you come baby." you didn't realize when you started rubbing yourself on his thigh but when he pulled back you whined like a kid whose candy fell down.
His grip on your face becomes lighter and he takes a step back looking at your disheveled form. You can swear you saw a tiny smirk but it suddenly turns into a serious expression.
"Baby, do you really want this? I mean I don't want you to do it for my sake, you know I wouldn't want you hurt."
Your eyes soften when you realize he stepped back to give you an open space to think this decision out. You offer him your hand and he looks at it narrowing his eyes with a pout.
Chuckling at his sudden baby behaviour you step forward and grab his hand to put it on the cheek. His eyes never leaving yours, he smiles but doesn't say anything waiting for you.
"Yes baby, I want this. I've wanted this for awhile and I've been researching and people say it feels awesome." You raise an eyebrow at him and point an assuring finger at him.
He watches you but is still hesitant so you continue. "I've been wanting to ask about this for quite some time but I thought why not your birthday? Actually, in a way, it's my selfish desire but we can name it as a gift." You wink at him and he laughs.
When he comes down from his laughter, you smile at him and there's a silence, a comfortable one.
You step up to him and put a hand on his neck while he watches you, you stand on your toes to reach him and before you kiss him he snakes a hand in your hair and asks in a whisper, "Are you sure you trust me with this?"
"Yes, I trust you kook"
And that was all he needed to let go, he kissed you so deliciously that you felt yourself melting. Standing on your toes didn't help you with the sticky feeling in between your thighs that came back as soon as his tongue slipped in.
You let out a moan when he nibbles on your lip, at the sound of your whimper he tightens his grasp on your hair and you gasp. Picking you up with his hands on the back of your thighs, he leads the both of you towards the bed and places you on it, lips never parting, he lays you down slowly as if he has all the time in the world meanwhile you can say you might die of anticipation and excitement.
Pulling back he smirks when he sees how you followed his lips as if not wanting him to stop kissing you. Your legs dangling from the bed, and him in between them, hovering above you, he feels and seem so huge and intimidating, you feel yourself release a gush of arousal at the way he eyes you.
He bends a little putting one knee on the bed between your thighs, and parting your legs for better access. You breathe heavily and feel heat cover your skin when he traces your thigh with his thumb and forefinger, so delicately, and you clench around nothing.
"So pretty." He exhales as he pulls the knot of your robe open, the material falling apart to reveal you, a very bare you. And you feel heat reach your ears making you shiver. As if in a trance, he traces his hand all over your body purposely missing the parts you want him to touch.
He lifts his eyes to make eye contact and at the same time squeezes the flesh on your waist making you gasp.
"Simple rules baby, don't come until I say so and tell me if you want to pause. Use the safe word if you feel you can't continue. Red yellow green, remember? "
You nod, panting hard, and the way he squeezes you in different places makes you feel the warmth in his hand. A moan is ripped out of you when he slaps your inner thigh soothing it later by rubbing the spot gently.
"Words." He grits the statement through his teeth while his hand travels up to your breasts and flick your nipple making you arch your back. You feel like you would crumble at the kind of persona he has right now.
Its not like he has never been rough with you, he has. But the way he looks at you right now, while only he knows what he is planning to do to you, makes you shiver because the fire in his eyes and the way he licks his lips now and then,  tells you that you might get destroyed, not that you wont like it.
"Y-Yes. I remember."
You see him smirk at your obedience, muttering a 'good girl' before he places an open mouthed kiss to both your nipples getting up. He takes your hand in his and places it over your pussy making you confused but still complying with whatever he tells you to do.
"Rub yourself baby, I need you to practise some discipline before I get my hands on you. Short and slow circles. And don't come." He says as he holds your wrist with one hand and takes his other hand to demonstrate the instructions. He parts your folds tracing your clit and you feel your body jump when he starts tracing circles, short and slow, and it feels so feathery you whine in frustration.
"Like this baby, okay?" you nod at his command and start complying by his instructions as soon as he gets up. He walks to your shared closet nonchalantly while you whine and twitch on the bed with your hands rubbing you just where you want but not with the pressure you need.
You try to resist but the urge to come is so much that you dont realise when your finger slipped in and you let out a high pitched moan. Not noticing that your husband came back while you kept fucking yourself with your finger.
You sense a burning stare on your skin and when you open your eyes you see him, hooded eyes, dark but disappointed.
Sensing him there you stop your fingers, involuntarily letting out a whine. He crouches down where his eyes are on the level to your cunt. "Why'd you stop baby? Keep going."
You dont do anything cause you know he doesnt like you disobeying him. He might be edging you for the first time but you know full well how pissed off he gets when you disobey him in bed.
"Here let me help." at this you panic because why is he-
Your thoughts are cut off when he inserts two of his fingers with your middle finger still inside you, stretching your pussy with a delicious burn that makes you mewl.
"Thats it. Thats it. You're so warm." he says in a breathy tone making you clench around him.
When he curls his fingers, he reaches your spot perfectly and your eyes roll back with a loud moan. You feel your orgasm reaching the threshold and you clench around his fingers, making him smirk.
'Gonna come princess?' Chuckling he bends down to lick at your clit in figure eights making your legs shake at the overstimulation. "Fuck- kook. D-Don't stop, pleasee. Fuc-"
He pulls his fingers out at the exact moment you knew you would combust with two or more thrusts of his fingers. Your body curls and falls downs the bed due to aftermath of the denial.
"Why? No please-" you cry out feeling a tear slip out of your eye. He hovers over you and grips your jaw tightly making you face him with big teary eyes. "Couldn't follow simple instructions, huh? Are you that dumb baby?" He coos mockingly, making shivers travel down your spine.
"I- I'm sorry" you shake in his hold due to the cut off and feel the heat of your climax simmer down.
"Oh are you?" He mocks you when you nod your head, leaning in he turns your head sideways to lick down the skin of your neck and you let out a groan.
"You're about to be sorry, you brat." He whispers in your ear and bites your earlobe making you groan and shiver.
He pulls back suddenly and flips you over. Knowing the drill you arch your back presenting yourself with your ass in the air and head down on the pillows. He smirks at the obedience you're showing palming your ass cheek with one hand and his bulge with the other.
You gulp at the possibility of him spanking you, nervousness and anxiety making you wetter, his fingers tap you twice on your thigh and you part your legs giving him better access.
You feel the bed dip behind you and when you turn back to see him, you groan shamelessly at the sight of his naked torso. The sharply carved abs makes your hole clench which he notices and chuckles darkly.
"I got an impatient little slut, don't I?"
Knowing better than to not respond you let out a little 'yes' and he scoffs. Bending down completely to face your exposed cunt, he separates your knees further until your folds can almost rub against the bed sheets. Suddenly you feel a puff of hot air on your pussy and you know you're done for.
He doesn't give any warnings and straight away dives in licking at your entrance.
You gasp in the pillow and fist the bed sheets to calm yourself but he plunges his tongue inside you making you sob. You try to get up in order to breathe but he gets up before you and shoves your face back down, keeping in mind that its on its side, not making you choke.
While he makes sure you keep your face down, he keeps rubbing your slit and  gathers some of your wetness, parting your folds and pressing his middle finger on your clit. Hard.
Keeping the pressure he starts rubbing it sideways and due to your earlier cutoff, you feel the heat trying to explode faster.
"Kook- I'm gonna cum please"
"No you're not, hold it in baby" he says through gritted teeth and keeps going.
"Fuck. I cant-"
"Hold it in"
"Jungkook! Please." You scream in fear of coming when he rubs you faster and you don't know how you would handle it if he cuts you off at this point. Just when you thought he might let you come, he pulls his hand away and you thrash around stomping your feet like a child making him coo.
"My poor baby" he pouts mockingly and you turn your head glaring at him with teary eyes. He smiles and wipes your tears with his thumb, "Just a little longer baby, I promise I will make you come so hard, you will feel it for days."
His promise makes you whine and a series of 'please and fuck me' tumbles out of your mouth. He flips your body to completely on your back to hover above you, kissing you with his one hand grabbing your waist and the other near your head not making him lose balance, your grab his hair almost too harshly when you hear him groan.
Now that you focus, he is also panting and probably going crazy with his dick trapped inside. You decide to selfishly use that against him.
"Please lemme taste you, please." Jungkook looks at you and sees how your innocent eyes peer up at him but he knows the intention behind them. He scoffs at your poor attempt at hiding your true motive but when he denies you with a shake of his head, you let your eyes fill with frustration once again and a small 'fuck you' comes out.
He laughs at this mocking you and you feel so hot you think you might explode. Humiliation makes you wet and turned on but when he has denied you for almost- you dont even have a count but it doesnt help when you cant come.
"Fine. Tell me what you want baby" he looks you in the eye with a smile and you feel your eyes water. "Please, fuck me?" you whisper as he wipes your tears with his thumb, gives you a peck on your cheek, smiles, and nods.
Getting up he pulls his cock out with a deep groan making you clench your walls. Red. Angry. Veiny and leaking. You stare at it while he strokes it letting out sticky sounds and precum that you wanna lick so bad.
"Like what you see baby?"
"Yes," you whisper which turns into a moan when he uses the same hand stroking his cock to plunge two fingers in and gather your slick. He watches you throw your head back on the pillow, smirking. Pulling his hand out he uses your slick to lube up his cock and you watch intently, when he hovers again. You shiver when his tip touches your entrance, shutting your eyes you exhale a breath.
"Open your eyes," he says holding your jaw tightly and you obey like a pet.
"Watch how I fuck you."
Saying this he enters you slowly and your eyes roll back in your skull. You both groan making eye contact while you hold onto his shoulders for dear life.
He stills inside you to let you adjust but you clench around him, making him moan. You plead with tears in your eyes, "Please move, pleasepleasepleas-"
Your statement gets cut off by a scream you let out when he pulls back and plunges his cock inside you. Your mouth opens up in a silent scream and your eyebrows furrow with pleasure. A sweaty and growling Jungkook hovers above you, his hair all wet and glowy skin, pulling back a little he kneels with his cock still buried in you. Fingers holding onto your waist leaving marks.
You feel yourself getting dizzy and your ears start ringing. He holds your ankle on the left side of his waist and pulls your leg up his shoulder making him go deeper. And when he hits The Spot, you know you're done.
"Fuck please baby please, make me come, let me come please" you cry
"Hold it in baby. You asked me to fuck you, not let you come. I am just giving you what you wanted. fuck!" He growls and your eyes widen at his words, you start crying out of desperation.
"No plea-"
"You're getting so tight, fuck yes! Wanna come around me? Wanna make a mess?" he grits it out and you nod sobbing as you feel your body tightening.
"Not yet"
"Jungkook I cant please."
"Fuck you're so warm, gonna make me come." He growls thrusting in you while you cry trying to hold in the heat threatening to explode. You grab at the sheets trying to control yourself.
"Go on come for me. Come on." He finally says when he sees you shaking and twitching uncontrollably. You let go of the control when he brings his thumb to your mouth and you let it in sucking at it mindlessly, gagging on it when he pushes it deeper.
"Such a slut for me" he smirks pulling the thumb out and brings it to your clit, his cock still drilling your cunt. You scream and lift your hips chasing your high. But he slams you down unhooking your leg and putting it around his waist.
He bends down to get close to you. You're twitching and crying and holding onto the pillows under your head, knuckles white. He pauses and you feel the fear of denial crawl on your face again.
You open your eyes in panic and you see him looking at you with so much love your heart clenches but you cry out shaking your head at the lack of movement, "please Jungkook let me come I cant-"
He shushes you putting a finger on your lip, you watch with wide glossy eyes.
"Come"
Saying this he hammers into you making you scream and clench so much he feels himself melting into you. You dig your nails into his back and he growls in the crook of your neck.
"Fuck baby! That's it that's it that's it, comingcoming ah-" you let out a scream when you feel the heat pass through you. You thrash in his arms digging your feet into the mattress trying to lift your hips but his weight over makes you feel like a shaking leaf under a rock.
He is still fucking you through your high making you whine. You hear his growls in your ears as you shake with overstimulation.
"K-kook" you let out a strangled moan when you feel too sensitive and he mumbles "one more" in your ear.
You shake you head, "I cant. Too sensitive."
"You can. You will. Come on." He pulls up and starts to rub your clit. You thrash around feeling a very intense amount of pressure down there and before you know it you squirt around him. Pushing him out. You scream and thrash while he pushes two of his fingers inside.
"Fuck. You're so hot." He watches you absentmindedly shake and he lets you calm down a bit before entering you again.
He knows he wont last longer, warmth and tightness pulling him into the climax while you whine in his hold. "Close. I am very close baby" he whispers in your ear and when he bites your earlobe,  you clench around him making him lose it.
"Oh shit. Fuckfuckfuck-" He slams his hand on the pillow under you to squeeze it growling out curses. You moan when you feel him spurt inside you, three big thrusts. So warm and delicious. You bite his shoulder due to the amount of emotions you feel right now.
There's silence in the room, with only your heavy breathing audible. After a while, when you feel the mixture of his body weight and the wetness beneath you becoming a little bit uncomfortable, you tickle his sides tiredly making him giggle and pull up a little. "You're so heavy" you say chuckling.
"You're so pretty," he says making eye contact with you and your cheeks heat up. You divert your gaze towards the lamp that has been shedding its light on you since the start of the 'workout'.
He giggles at how shy you get even after years of marriage. "Really? Getting shy when I call you pretty? Baby, you were literally begging me to fuck you like minutes ago. 'Pleasepleaseplease' you're so cute-"
You smack his chest pouting, making him laugh and you watch him in awe. His laugh is so pretty you fall deeper in love every time he laughs. You don't realise when you started to cry but when he looks at you, you sniff and before he could say something, you pull him down into a kiss.
It's not a tongue-and-teeth-clashing-urgent-kiss. It's just you and him kissing out of so many feelings at the same time that you couldn't describe it in words. You cry in his arms due to the overwhelming post-sex emotions. And he pats your head cuddling you and calming you down.
"I love you angel" he says in your hair
"I love you too" you sniff in his chest. You never realized when you changed your positions but you were crying in his chest resting your body over his huge sweaty one with his caressing you.
Afterwards, you try and stumble towards the washroom when he gets off to clean up a bit, but your muscled husband runs up to your side and carried you while he scolds you for not asking him to help.
He helps you get cleaned up after you peed. Wiping your thighs and your folds with extra care knowing you were sensitive, peppering kisses on your face, arms, and thighs in the meantime.
Helping you get up he tucks you under the duvet, in fresh clothing after making sure you're hydrated, switching off the lights, he sees you making grabby hands so he  promises to cuddle you after throwing the dirty sheets in the laundry bag.
He kisses your temple and gathers the sheets. Coming back he makes sure no light is switched on so that you don't accidentally wake up due to it, you're deep in sleep when he gets in bed beside you. Tucking your hair behind your ears he kisses your forehead and smiles at the tiny snores your tired body let out, cuddling you he makes sure you don't get uncomfortable with his weight but also stays near for body warmth.
Smiling he drifts off to sleep with you in his arms. This is his world. You are his world.
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jjkeverlast · 3 months ago
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hurts so good | jjk
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-> pairing best friend!jk x reader
-> genre crack and filthy smut
-> summary having jungkook as a best friend had it's cons, for one he complains, a lot. surprisingly he shows up at your door at two in the morning to complain about something incredibly different.
-> word count 4.3k
-> warnings sub!koo, switch!reader, change of perspectives, swearing (a lot of it), handjob, oral (m. receiving), dry humping, grinding, cervix sex, size kink (it’s big dick!jk), reader has a pain kink! no protection (y'all know the drill tho!)
-> authors note! ah... my baby is finally here. i should mention that this will be my last upload while i'm on summer vacation before i return back to school for my last year of studies. so i'll be less active, but fear not! my upcoming projects will arrive sooner or later... just with a longer time gap in between. <3
[btw, i'll edit this later... it's literally 4am so if there's any mistakes i'll take care of it when i wake up!]
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‘’Jungkook? It’s 2 in the morning.’’ You’re shocked to see Jungkook in nothing but a black sweats attire and a pissed off face. 
‘’I need to vent.’’ He reasons. 
‘’At 2 in the fucking morning?’’ Now you’re pissed. The sleepy eyes long forgotten and the 8 hour sleep you were looking forward to all day. You let out a huff, moving aside for Jungkook to enter. He better have a good fucking reason for this shit, you internally think as he comfortably sits on your couch as if it’s his own home. Sure, he carries the best friend title but he really had a thing for being way too comfortable in that department. Which explains him snacking on your unfinished snacks after your movie night — yes, with yourself. 
‘’Hey! Seriously?’’ You snatch the bag of chips, as his mouth is full paired with his doe eyes looking at you in shock. 
‘’I was hungry!’’ It’s muffled, small crumbs of chips flying out of his mouth. Disgusting. 
‘’Just tell me why you’re here so I can go to bed as quickly as possible.’’ You settle the bag of chips beside you as you sit next to him on your living room couch. Jungkook swallows the chips, his annoyed face returning quickly — as if he forgot why he was irritated in the first place. 
‘’Okay, well, Victoria is out of the picture.’’ Victoria as in the woman who’s been involved with Jungkook the last month. They met through one of your friends and quickly they agreed to see each other. You’d heard zero complaints about their relationship, up until now. 
‘’I’m sorry Koo. What happened?’’ Now he’s being really quiet, too quiet for your liking. 
‘’Jeon Jungkook.’’ Your voice is stern and he knows he’s gonna have to speak up now or you’ll kick him out. 
‘’You won’t believe me.’’ 
‘’Try me.’’ His brows raise, noticing you’re quickly losing your patience with him. 
‘’It was because of… of the sex.’’ Sex. A very broad subject in your opinion, having a million reasons why sex can be bad and shakingly good. So for Jungkook to reason sex, your mind immediately thinks that it has something to do with the fact that Victoria didn’t finish while they fucked. Which could be true? You wouldn’t know. Yes, so Jungkook and you were best friends and overshared a tad bit much at times, although sex? Sex was never really on the table of ‘subjects to talk about’. 
‘’Fuck this is gonna sound so wrong.’’ Jungkook grunts, tilting his head back and your thoughts are left on the shelf for now. 
‘’It can’t be that bad.’’ Jungkook makes a noise, stating he’s disagreeing with your comment.You roll your eyes at his childish act. 
‘’Jungkook, if it’s about you not making her finish I will kick you out.’’ You’re serious. If he came to your apartment to complain about not making someone cum at 2 in the morning, he’s gonna join the wolves and god knows whatever lurks in the streets at night. 
‘’It was hurting her. Y/N I fucking hurt her.’’ You’re puzzled, trying to figure out how exactly Jeon Jungkook could be hurting anyone. 
‘’Wha–’’ 
‘’With my fucking dick.’’ It’s silent. The air con noise grows louder in your apartment as you both stare at each other in fright. Did he just say–
‘’Y-your dick?’’ You tilt your head, eyes wide open not having a chance at being closed. He’s nodding slowly and you wheeze — thinking this is some sick joke that he wanted to pull on you. Classic Jeon Jungkook. 
‘’Y/N I’m serious.’’ Your laughter continues on, you almost tearing up as it becomes uncontrollable. As your mind slowly processes the awkward silence from Jungkook's side, you quiet your laughter and listen to what he has to say. 
“It’s because of my- my length.” 
“Length? As in you're big enough to reach her cervix?” You joke playfully, hitting him on the arm as you’d guessed he’d laugh at it but instead?
“Yeah.” You’re speechless.
Your laugh being completely swallowed, taken back by the agreement to your joke. Was he serious? He couldn’t possibly, then that would mean he probably has a big di–
‘’You don’t believe me.’’ You really don’t. 
‘’It’s just hard to believe… that’s all.’’ Jungkook couldn’t possibly. It’s weird for you to even think about. 
“How can I make you believe me? Cause I am seriously struggling with women and this isn’t helping.” He gives you a stern look with a glimpse of urge for help. He’s desperate. 
“Prove it to me.” There’s no words to describe the expression that is currently resting on Jungkook's face. A mix of every expression a person can carry.
“I’m not showing you my dick.” He gives you the obvious tone of ‘you can’t be serious right now’ and crosses his arms as you’re no help to his little situation.
“Then I’m not believing you.” 
“Fine!”
“Fine.” You’re both staring into the black TV screen, arms crossed as the silence returns. It’s awkward for once. You were obviously joking about Jungkook showing you his dick — not yourself wanting to see what’s behind his black sweats. As if the thought ever occurred to you of what it looks like…
Okay, so maybe you have. Once. It wasn’t your fault when Victoria had been drunkenly babbling over how big Jungkook was. You didn’t think of it as much, seeing she was in a drunken state. But when Jungkook admits it, you immediately try to shut down the idea that he might be telling the truth. You didn’t want to even begin to imagine how Jungkook is in bed. Is he needy and whiny? Or controlling and grunting? No, seriously Y/N stop. You grunt in annoyance and that catches Jungkook’s attention, watching you bite your lip. He would never admit that you, leaning your head back, your lip tucked in between your teeth is hot. Like really fucking hot. No. You’re his best friend, for seven years to be exact. He can’t possibly find that hot. 
Maybe it was because of the fact that he sought your help after Victoria threw a tantrum at him for having a big dick. It has never occured him to be attracted to you, you had been friends for so long that sex or just anything regarding a sexual situation between you never crossed his mind. When he looks over once again, your eyes now closed, swallowing the silence that's filling the room between you as the tension grows. Maybe it’s only from Jungkook’s side, or maybe yours as well, although he can’t tell what you’re thinking. 
‘’Let’s just forget this okay?’’ You finally speak, with a regretful tone which Jungkook catches too quickly for his liking. He should’ve never found you hot for a split second. It’s wrong. So fucking wrong of him. 
‘’Yeah, okay. I’ll leave.’’ Jungkook rubs his palms against his sweats, trying to calm himself from the ungodly thoughts of you crossing his mind slowly. 
‘’Or–’’ You start off, catching his attention as he turns to meet your eyes, you look tired. ‘’You could– you could stay.’’ He never expected for you to invite him to stay. Sleepovers between the two of you were never involved in your seven year long friendship. Jungkook wanted to stay, and because you proposed made him hopeful. Hopeful in a sense that maybe, just maybe you’ve thought of it too. 
‘’Sure, okay, I’ll stay.’’ He’s hesitant. Are you both going to share a bed? 
‘’You can just sleep on the couch. I’ll get you a duvet.’’ You smile awkwardly, leaving the living room and entering your bedroom while Jungkook feels incredibly stupid. Of course you don’t want him, you’ve never wanted him. He wants to slap his face for letting himself be attracted to you. 
‘’Here.’’ You’re already back, holding the duvet close to you, as you place it on the couch you wish him goodnight and return back to your room. 
As your door closes, Jungkook sighs loudly, falling back against the couch. He’s fucked. It’s fine, he just has to sleep his attraction towards you away. He discards his sweats attire, leaving him in his black Calvin Clein boxers, a personal favorite of his. 
When he finally settles in, covered in your duvet, he catches the smell of you enveloping the fabric. It doesn't help his mind which already has you covering most of it. He tries to shake out of it, turning and at last closing his eyes. 
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After what feels like an hour of tossing and turning, Jungkook comes to the conclusion that he can’t sleep. He wants you, more than he thought he would. He’ll probably hurt you, which is one of the few reasons holding him back from knocking on your door. Also the fact that you are very clear on the best friend scale. 
There’s a lot of risks that would be taken if he stood up and walked towards you, admitting how much he wants you, how desperate he is to let you touch him. All thoughts vanish from him when he comes to conclusion that he’s saying fuck it. He’ll just leave if you don’t feel the same way and burrow himself deep in his bed and never leave until his attraction disappears completely. 
He gets up, throwing the duvet off himself and being met with your white wooden door. His heartbeat is increasing as he urges himself to pull his arm up and form his hand to a knuckle to leave a knock. 
As he’s about to knock, the door flies open and you’re standing in front of him, in nothing but a loose transparent white tee. Your nipples are on display for his eyes and he’s gulping over seeing more of you than he expected. Wait– why are you awake? 
‘’Y/N?’’ 
‘’I– I couldn’t sleep.’’ You’re looking down, stealing a quick glance at his bulge which he notices. Do you, do you want him? God the buildup is absolutely killing him. But he tries to control himself, holding himself back from asking you if he can kiss you. 
He clears his throat, ‘’why?’’ You were probably thirsty or maybe the thought of him being here caused you to sleep badly. He felt bad. 
‘’I can’t stop thinking about it.’’ Your posture changes, a dominant demeanor overlapping itself on your shoulders. You’re stern, firm and just plainly honest. Could you be any hotter? 
‘’Thinking about what?’’ You’re smiling, your gaze landing on his silver chain hanging around his neck. With a swift movement you’re hooking a finger around it and pulling him to your lips. Jungkook freezes, his lips feeling warm as they’re covered by yours. He can’t process the fact that you’re kissing him. It feels so right, your chest pressed firmly against his, as he’s able to feel your hardened nipples through the fabric. 
Before your fingers can grab onto his hair, he stops. ‘’Are you sure?’’ You’ve crossed the friendship line, the kiss breaking the scale completely. 
‘’Yes. Let me feel you Koo.’’ Your pleading eyes, and the firm grip your finger has on his chain leaves him dizzy. He lets you, lets you take full control of him. 
‘’Touch me.’’ He catches your smile at his request before you pull him further in the bedroom and guide him to lay down. His heartbeat is going crazy fast, his mind barely being able to comprehend that you’re about to straddle his lap. 
As you position yourself on top of him, a low grunt leaves his lips as the contact between your core and his visible bulge closes. He’s already so hard and you’ve barely touched him. 
Your fingers grab his hair, tenderly running your fingers through the undercut. ‘’I love your hair like this.’’ You compliment as you go back to kiss him, missing the warmth of his mouth already. 
Jungkook is careful with you, wanting to touch you everywhere, run his hand down your spine and feel the warmth of your skin under his palm but he holds himself back. His mind is back to thinking of you hurting, and feeling hurt because of his length. This is a bad idea.
‘’Wait.’’ He holds your shoulders, your hands laid flatly on his chest with a worried expression. 
‘’What’s wrong?’’ You look like someone who’s scared you’ve gone too far and Jungkook feels a tinge of guilt. 
‘’I don’t want to hurt you.’’ He whispers, being careful with his choice of words. 
‘’What if I want it to hurt?’’ You trace your fingers on his chest, drawing them in small circles as his eyes move to your half hidden smirk. 
‘’I–’’ 
‘’Just, trust me.’’ Your head falls down on his chest, leaving kisses on his chest and letting your tongue run freely on his exposed skin as he whimpers beneath you. Your tongue feels amazing on him and he gives in, letting you control the situation. 
‘’Okay.’’ Jungkook softly says, your head moving lower towards his abdomen, peppering his skin with kisses and biting gently down to give him a small taste of what awaits him. 
He can sense that you’re being patient, savoring up the moment of having him like this. His body is a canvas for you, to mark, bite and let your mouth run freely on. He wants you to take control, to show him how well you’ll be able to please him as he later on will give you his cock to fill you up. 
‘’This– this feels really good.’’ He mumbles, barely forming a full sentence, too captivated by the feeling of you above him. 
You hum against his skin, seeming more than pleased in hearing his compliment regarding your mouth. You’ve moved longer down, your legs now settled between his as your breath lands hot on his clear hard on. 
Jungkook looks up to see you gawking at him and he grows embarrassed. 
‘’Y/N, stop looking.’’ 
‘’Sorry, you just weren’t kidding.’’ Somehow the answer resolves in you and Jungkook laughing like idiots and him throwing a ‘I told you so’ into the middle of your shared laugh. The laughter soon dies down and the irresistible tension returns to the dark bedroom, the only light coming from the outside lights covering the streets. It’s the only light which helps the both of you in seeing a glimpse of one another. 
‘’Can I?’’ You ask, holding one hand firmly on his hip as your thumb traces on the top of Jungkook’s Calvin Clein boxers. He gulps, nodding as he allows you to take things further. 
You take your time in taking his boxers off, Jungkook can’t help but have his hips shake – reasons being he’s nervous yet thrilled for this to happen. Having his cock on full display for your eyes is nerve wracking, he’d never see this day coming. 
‘’Hey, I’ll be gentle.’’ With that you use your thumb, smearing his leaking pre-cum as he bucks his hips wanting more. Jungkook is infatuated by your touch, becoming more needy for you.
‘’Fuck– your hand feels so soft.’’ He throws in a compliment and surprisingly you go at a faster pace, a sudden moan escaping his lips. Fuck, how are you so good at this? The sensational feeling from your hand has Jungkook closing his eyes, also because he’s nervous to look at you while your hand is wrapped firmly around him. He’s too confused and captivated by you and the pleasure you’re giving him that he still really hasn’t processed what is happening right at this moment. It feels surreal. 
Your thumb traces itself on his tip once again, Jungkook running his hand through his hair as his breathing speeds up, a familiar feeling of release washing over him. Fuck, you haven’t even touched him for long and he’s already thinking of cumming. You, his best friend since he had his awful hair fazes that just never really complimented his features. His best friend since high school, as you both lamely made fun of the PDA couples, who never knew what the word ‘privacy’ meant. He’s too deep in thought, until you suddenly stop. Jungkook hesitantly opens his eyes, using his elbows for support as he now looks at you.
‘’Can I taste you?’’ Jungkook almost chokes at your question. His already fucked out of it state isn’t even hesitant. Fuck he’d love your lips wrapped around him. Your lips look even softer than your hand. The outline of your lips visible for his eyes as the moonlight discreetly shines over them. God, you make him so weak. 
Truth be told, Jungkook doesn’t remember the last time he’s ever been this willing, this open to just anything. But if it includes you? He’s all for it. 
‘’Y-yeah.’’ Fuck, he just stuttered. You probably think he’s being hesitant and–
You gently lick his tip, swirling it around to allow the taste of him to linger itself in your mouth, your hand starts to move again and Jungkook’s mouth falls apart, his eyes watching you. If only you could see how pretty you were as you open wider, inviting more of him. Your mouth feels so warm, so welcoming. He wonders if it’s possible to get addicted to a certain body part, because he’ll for sure mention your mouth if asked. 
‘’God, your mouth.’’ He wants to caress your cheeks softly, as his thumb can feel how well he’s filling your mouth up. Maybe it’s too much… too sentimental. Seeing you’re literally stuffing your face with his cock, your hand stroking what you aren’t able to take. 
Although, he forms a sort of courage and asks you gently, ‘’can I touch you?’’ You let go of his cock with a pop, brows furrowed as if you’re uncertain of where exactly he wants to touch you. 
‘’Please?’’ 
‘’Okay.’’ Jungkook leans closer to you, his hand cupping your cheek as his thumb grazes the top of it. You lean in his touch before you go back down, taking him in your mouth once again. He won’t survive this. No. He won’t survive you. 
He’s almost about to break when his palm feels the bump caused by his cock in your mouth as you bop your head faster, all while Jungkook whines freely — not knowing he’s making you extremely wet by moaning so carelessly. 
It’s not until you use your hand, focusing solely on sucking his tip that he’s almost about to finish. You retrieve before he’s able to, a string of saliva connecting you to his tip as you smile so innocently. Yeah, he’s definitely not surviving you. 
“What are you doing to me?” It isn’t a question, rather a statement towards everything he feels for you in this instant moment. 
You guide yourself back up, lips molding against his. He can taste himself on your tongue and it drives him crazy. He’s almost willing himself to take control — he’s never done or wanted that before, but there’s just something about you which drives him in a completely different direction. 
Should he touch you? Touch you in ways he’s always found appealing but never for him? He’s willing, for you he is. Slowly but surely, he tenderly peppers your neck with kisses, slipping his tongue to run along. He’s startled when you moan so effortlessly. He wants to hear more of you and those heavenly sounds you’re so willing to offer him. 
You begin to move, grinding your clothed core over his bare cock and a rush is sent through him. It’s almost as if he’s gotten you needy now, so needy you couldn’t contain yourself from grinding on top of him — still fully clothed. It feels new, although Jungkook loves it, cause fuck he can feel how wet you are. Did you get this wet by only touching him? 
‘’You’re already so wet.’’ A grunt leaves his lips when you only hum in response, continuing your grinding, almost as if you’re losing yourself completely at the touch of him. 
‘’Fuck, fill me up. I can’t wait anymore.’’ You push him down, hurrying yourself to take your shirt off. Since when did you go from being patient to impatient so fast? He can’t help but feel extremely proud of himself, patting himself mentally on the back. 
But then he’s in tact of what’s happening, you’re about to sit yourself down on his cock and he’s afraid — even though you made it clear you want it to hurt — he just… cares too much about you and the thought of you being in pain because of him doesn’t sit well with him.  
‘’Hey, are you sure? I really don’t want to hurt you.’’ You’re just about to position yourself, freezing in your movement. You’ve probably caught on how afraid he is. 
‘’Koo, I want this. It’s okay.’’ You peck his lips softly, his hold on you loosening to inform you that he trusts you. 
His tip is barely inside of you and a whimper lets itself out of him. Scratch that about your mouth being his favorite body part of yours, your pussy definitely steps on the podium for number one. 
You continue, Jungkook catching the sight of his cock disappearing within you and his breathing starts to quicken. He probably won’t last long, not when you wrap yourself so nicely around him the further you go down. 
‘’Shit—’’ You let out, fully sunk down on him. There’s a tinge of discomfort covering your face but Jungkook forces himself not to worry, you want this, you want him. It’s soon replaced by a smile, as you start bucking your hips, letting yourself settle on him. 
He really takes the time to notice how beautiful your breasts are, looking so delicate. God, he wants to touch them, touch every inch of you. 
He’s reminding himself of the sounds you let out as he placed his lips on your neck, would you react the same way if he latched his lips on your exposed breasts as well? There’s really only one way to find out. Yet he wants to be good for you, letting you use him to make yourself finish. 
You surprise him once again, guiding his hands towards your breasts — as if you knew he was having a tantrum with himself over if he should touch them or not — he was right, they’re incredibly soft. Your nipples perked and good enough to suck but then again, he holds himself back. 
‘’You feel so good.’’ Your words are mostly slurred, too focused on the pleasure — your eyes closed as you run your fingers through Jungkook’s hair — his hair that you like. 
He makes you feel good, you keep reminding him when you mutter it once more as your hips buck at a faster pace. Shit, you really know how to ride him well. 
It’s as if something clicks for Jungkook when you go down to bite his earlobe followed by an angelic whimper. He loses all control of himself. ‘’Fuck–’’ He’s taking control, flipping you around so you’re beneath him, hair sprawled on your pillow and eyes about to pop out of their socket. 
‘’What are you–’’ Jungkook latches his mouth on your hardened nipples, nibbling his tongue softly on them and it was so worth it. They feel so soft against his tongue. Although not as soft as your pussy wrapping itself perfectly around him.
Jungkook feels dizzy, drowning in the feeling of how he’s swallowed by your warmth. Fuck he’d keep himself burried in you forever if he could. 
He starts thrusting, profanities break out from you when the pace quickens. He’s reckless at this point, showing you how much you affect him. 
As the time passes, skin grows hotter, small beads of sweat covering Jungkook’s forehead. You’re both close. He can sense it as you convulse around him which almost leaves him breathless. 
‘’Fuck— it hurts, it hurts so good.’’ With that your body loses its composure beneath him as you come undone. 
It’s something about you making him good about himself, not only him as a person but him in whole. You’ve always been so accepting of whatever bullshit he’s brought upon you. He feels safe around you, your arms wrapped around his form as you run your fingers through his hair. You feel like home. You are his home. 
With a low muttered fuck, Jungkook feels his cock twitch as his hips stutter for one last thrust, filling you up with everything he has. 
His hair covers most of his sight, both of you panting in sync as you try to calm yourselves. When his cock begins to soften, he takes it as a sign to let himself plop down next to you. 
‘’I’ve– I’ve never…’’ Jungkook doesn’t know where to begin. He can’t recognize the person he was right before. 
‘’Taken control?’’ You steal his unspoken words and he turns to see you smiling softly. The moonlight has turned to a chrome yellow, indicating that a sunrise was indeed nearing. Your features have become more prominent for Jungkook’s eyes and your beauty captivates him by an invisible hook. 
‘’Yeah, taken control.’’ 
‘’You should do it more often.’’ It’s an encouragement and it seems to work because the idea of being in control doesn’t faze Jungkook. He loved it. 
It’s been around an hour after Jungkook surprisingly fucked you. You’re both situated in your kitchen. The sunrise covering most of the apartment with it’s golden rays that strike inside the windows from the living room.  
‘’What are you thinking?’’ Jungkook caught onto your frown, indicating you’re thinking about something. 
‘’I’m thinking that… I liked this, what just happened, I really liked it. It felt–’’
‘’Right?’’ He answers for you and you nod. 
‘’I don't want this to be the last time.’’ 
‘’It won’t be.’’ Carefully, Jungkook cups your face, his nose brushing against yours. He really wants to kiss you again. 
‘’Kiss me.’’ You seem impatient, and Jungkook gladly does as you request. 
Maybe, maybe this was always supposed to happen between you. 
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© jjkeverlast 2022 [do not copy, translate or repost any of my works.]
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venusjeon · 3 months ago
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rock god
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you've got one year left to either finish your novitiate and become a nun like your parents always wanted, or leave the order and live a secular life like you've always wanted. but the fact that a sister's flirty nephew is staying in the convent for the summer provides a perfect distraction to such headache.
♔ PAIRING: rockstar!jungkook x novice!reader
♔ GENRE: 80s au, angst, smut, humour, fluff, s2f2l
♔ WORD COUNT: 16.3k another long one i'm sorry
♔ WARNINGS: minor characters death, religious themes, catholic guilt, smoking weed, swearing, sacrilege and exhibitionism: fingering in a church, profanity, blasphemy, quiet sex & loss of virginity (you're probably thinking girl AGAIN?), protected sex, betrayal, one mention of rape
♔ AUTHOR'S NOTE: for an atheist i do seem to write a lot about religion lol. the first song jk writes & performs for reader + the inspiration for the title is rock god by selena gomez, and the second one church by chase atlantic. i recommend you listen to them in advance☺️ also, we'll pretend jk is blond in the banner okay?
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1986
The day was going incredibly slow, as all of last month’s had.
Most people would attribute that to the fact that you were a novice, but their idea of what that entailed was far from the reality. Contrary to popular belief and even if some sisters wished it was the case, cloistered nuns didn’t spend all day just praying. There were many other things to keep busy with in a convent, such as attending to one’s studies, doing household chores, or working to bring money in and keep the place going. Free time had never been the part of the day you looked the most forward to, though, until recently. Not that it got any better then.
Contradictory as though it was, you were kept from the present by the same plaguing thoughts you didn’t want to be left alone with… And sometimes, such as now, you didn’t have any choice but to force yourself back into reality, running late as you were.
The novice mistress Sister Daeun—that is, the one responsible for the training of the novices—had assigned you to fix the torn seams on your classmates’ habits that morning. Hey, someone had to do it. So off you ran through the cloister not to melt under the same sun others didn’t seem to mind.
Others being Jungkook and the group of girls who gathered around to listen to him play the guitar.
The presence of men wasn’t rare in your abbey, built some centuries back. It was sort of shut off from the rest of the world, hidden up in a mountain, but lost hikers always wandered into it and the abbot was more than happy to let them spend a night or two as guests, regardless of their gender.
Jungkook was a guest too.
He was in a rock band, or so you’d heard, and that career choice was why his parents had kicked him out, something you’d pity him for if he wasn’t always in a cheery mood whenever you chanced to see him around. Of course, what guy wouldn’t, surrounded by girls?
It didn’t bother you that some of your less spiritual sisters succumbed to his tattoos, long dyed blond hair, charming voice, and piercings. Their parents would doubtlessly tell them to stay away from someone who looked like a delinquent—your conscience did too—but then again, they were the ones who’d forcefully made them join the order, so you understood where the girls’ disobedience came from. On a personal level, in fact.
Though not because of the same reason, you weren’t there willingly either.
Unlike theirs, your behaviour wasn’t scandalous in any way and there was no need for you to be schooled in rectitude, no. This was just the path your parents had wanted you to take since you were little and you’d resigned to comply, however unhappy it made you. It wasn’t that you wouldn’t make a good nun, devout as you’d been raised and actually enjoyed being, but it wasn’t your calling.
Leaving the lively cloister behind and trying to do the same with your affliction, you rushed to your destination.
About three hours later, you were still sat in front of the sewing machine in the otherwise empty laundry room, humming on a loop the part of the song Jungkook had been playing earlier. You couldn’t deny it was catchy... Besides, you needed a tune to distract you from the machine’s repetitive noise and the summer heat, or else you’d go crazy. Maybe you had already, given you’d failed to notice someone opening the creaky door and walking in.
“Hello?”
Startled, you raised your head to meet the eyes of the rockstar himself, filled with something akin to interest. “Oh, hi...”
Jungkook chuckled. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to sneak up on you.” Before you could kindly tell him not to worry, that it was your fault for spacing out, he grabbed the hem of his shirt to show you the hole in it that until then you hadn’t caught sight of. “I was told to come here to get this fixed?” He then glanced at the dozen habits lying on the table you still had to work on, and changed his mind not to burden you, “But I can come another time– Or not at all! I mean, ripped clothes are trendy, aren’t they?”
For the first time in a while, you laughed genuinely and not out of courtesy, “I wouldn’t know, there’s not much variety in a novice’s wardrobe.” Since Jungkook’s t-shirt would just take a moment to mend and you didn’t mind helping him, you decided to neglect your current task without a second thought, holding out your hand with a smile. “It’s alright, really!”
“You’re an angel.” He smiled back as he took off his t-shirt, exposing a toned body you weren’t prepared for. Bet he says that to all the girls, intruded a thought in your mind as though to make go away the uplift of his compliment, but you brushed it off before he reached the table. “By the way, was that my song you were just humming?”
“Oh? I heard you sing it earlier, but I didn’t know it was yours,” you said while getting to work. Meanwhile, Jungkook leaned against the door’s frame. “I don’t really listen to music much.”
“What?!” He was utterly shocked, eyes wide like he’d seen a ghost. “That’s the greatest sin of all! I’ll have a serious conversation with the abbot, they’re not teaching you girls the important stuff here.” Father Jimin would certainly be amused at such a request. “But I did see you running earlier in the cloister, now that I think about it. It is hot, Y/N, but I don’t believe the floor is in flames.”
He knows my name? What a stupid question. Whoever had told him to come to the laundry room must have seen you entering it and mentioned you’d be there.
“Yeah, I was late, had overslept. It probably looked like someone was chasing me… Nun on the run!” you rhymed out of nowhere. “There’s a title for your next single.”
“If naming my songs will get you to listen to them, I’m down.” You looked up from the task at hand to ask him if that meant he’d credit ‘Sister Y/N’ as a songwriter, but the sight of someone walking down the hallway towards the laundry room scared the words away. “You know, you’re too pretty to be a nun.”
Sister Daeun, now right behind Jungkook, smacked the back of his head and asked, “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Jungkook’s smile turned into a pout as he rubbed the spot. “Nothing, aunty. Ouch…”
Yes, he was her nephew, which was the main reason why Father Jimin had allowed him to stay not just for a few days, but the whole summer. Sister Daeun had promised on his behalf that as a thanks, he would help around to earn his bed and under no circumstances put in peril anyone’s vow of chastity. If he weren’t so good-looking, you imagined she wouldn’t have needed to make that promise.
“Y/N…” she sighed when she saw the pile of habits you had yet to fix the seams of. Despite the disappointment in her voice, she made sure to say tactfully, “It’s almost midday, I asked you to have all of them done before ten.”
Jungkook was the only one in the room who had no clue as to why you’d been working so slowly, but he didn’t hesitate to step forward when your head lowered in shame. “My bad, I’ve been distracting her for hours. And on top of it, I gave her more work…”
He approached the sewing machine, got his t-shirt, and put it on, all while you stared at him at a loss for words. Why would he take the blame? Sister Daeun started telling you to finish some other time and get ready for lunch, but you stopped listening, attention fixed on Jungkook as he discreetly winked at you before leaving.
That wasn’t the last time you met that day. Well, incorrect, because it was past midnight.
Like many nights before, guilt stirred a restlessness that kept you from falling asleep, the only solution you could think of being walking around the empty abbey in the hope of tiring your body and with it, your brain. It wasn’t that easy, though, often hours how long you’d wander about, always ending up at the cloister. Sitting on the stone base between the columns and gazing up at the stars brought some peace to you. More than praying, it appeared.
That night, such peace was disrupted when barely after ten minutes of it, the sound of a lighter being flicked made your head whip around.
“So you do have hair,” Jungkook joked as he sat against a column, bending one knee so he could rest his elbow on it. Although a bit embarrassed you were in your pyjamas and thus wearing no white veil that covered your head in front of a guy you didn’t know, you did the same on the next column to be able to face him. “Can’t sleep either?”
“Lately, not.”
He puffed at his joint before offering it to you, and a short laugh broke through your lips. Was he seriously tempting a novice to burn one with him? To be fair, he did mean to help you sleep, but it was still a bit… much for you. “I’ll pass, thank you.”
“Yeah, probably not a good idea,” Jungkook nodded at his own words before taking another puff, blowing the smoke to a side so it wouldn’t reach you. “I don’t want your parents to make a complaint because there’s a bloke loose in the convent corrupting the nuns. Can’t afford to be kicked out of here, too,” he whispered the last bit, as though talking to himself.
“Don’t worry, that’s not happening.”
“Why not? Are you girls not allowed visits or something?”
“No, we are, it’s just… they died last month. Car crash.”
“Shit, I’m so sorry.” You could see in Jungkook’s wide eyes how much he regretted bringing them up. “That explains why you were out of sorts this morning... Agh, I can’t believe they’re still making you do work, what a bunch of heartless pricks! Not to mention class, I mean, isn’t it summer?”
His indignation for your sake came as a surprise. Ignorantly, you’d allowed prejudices to decide what kind of person Jungkook was before he got the chance to show you himself. The familiar guilt well-deservedly returned to grip your heart.
“Father Jimin actually had me switch jobs with some sisters so that I’d get to do less demanding stuff,” you came to the poor abbot’s defence. “It makes no difference, but he’s not to blame nothing can.”
"Doesn’t praying help?” He took another puff, lips curling into a smirk at the thought that next crossed his mind. “I thought nuns had a direct line with God.”
The truth was your relationship with the Lord had strained. As someone whose thoughts and desires couldn’t help but fall into sin over and over, you didn’t feel worthy of His comfort, or dared ask for guidance. His or anybody’s.
“I have to go through the telephonist angels first, I’m not an official nun yet.” The muscles of your face relaxed, gaze falling to your lap. “To be honest, I don’t think I want to be.”
Jungkook’s head cocked to a side. “Really? So, what are you doing here? You don’t strike me as the type forced by her p– uh, family.”
“I do like this place and what they’re teaching us, but I’m here because my parents wanted a saintly daughter who could put in a good word for them up there. I tried telling them once that I have dreams of my own, but it ended in an argument they had the last word in. Now that they’re dead, it’s like the topic is permanently sealed, I can never talk them out of it. And I mean, I love them, so how can I disappoint them? What would it say about me if I waited until my parents were dead to disobey them?”
Only after you finished venting did it dawn on you that perhaps you’d said too much. After all, what did Jungkook care? What did anyone?
“What’s your dream?”
The question took you aback, but you still answered, “I’d like to go to university, get married someday, have kids... Not be trapped inside these four walls for the rest of my life, you know?”
“I know exactly what you mean, trust me,” Jungkook said quietly before puffing at his joint again. “You’re free to leave, though, right? I don’t need to master-plan an escape?”
You hummed a laugh, mindful not to be loud enough to wake anyone up, given neither of you should be out of bed. There may or may not have been a curfew you were breaking, as well as a tradition called the Great Silence in which everyone kept quiet from the final liturgical prayer of the day until the earliest one the next morning. It was a rule often broken, especially by you, but that didn’t mean the abbey wasn’t dead silent.
“Anytime I want, yes, only next year I’m supposed to take my solemn vows.” Jungkook nodded but a slight frown gave away he didn’t know what that meant. “Poverty, chastity, and obedience? It’s like a wedding with Jesus. I can always divorce him, but that doesn’t mean marriage is a light affair.”
Most orders didn’t work like that. There were various stages one had to go through before becoming a professed nun: an optional aspirancy, then a postulancy, a novitiate, and finally, a juniorate. Since you’d gone to Catholic school all your life, you’d skipped the first, done no more than a few months of the second, were about to start the final year of the third, and would not be doing the fourth since your convent didn’t teach it. Instead of six more years of formation before taking your perpetual vows, then, you had only one.
“Damn, and here I thought I had the most fucked up horoscope of the year. Maybe we were born on the same month.”
“What do you mean?”
“Doesn’t everyone know my parents kicked me out because I want to be a rockstar?”
“Yeah...”
Once again, you’d assumed wrongly about him. That because of his profession and looks, he was a rebellious kid who hated his parents and was glad to be rid of them. You hadn’t even considered their shunning might be putting him through a hard time.
“Look, disappointing your parents beats living a miserable life just to please them, even if it sucks. One day we’ll be old, and I personally want to look back and not regret my youth, feel like I wasted it. I’m not gonna tell you what to do but if you want my opinion, getting out of here and chasing your dreams says no more than you’re in charge of your own life.”
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You had no idea why after that, Jungkook had taken it as his mission to stick with you.
It was common knowledge that you’d barely uttered ten words since your parents’ accident, so all eyes were drawn like magnets when you engaged in conversation with him of all people for hours on end. Since you came from vastly different worlds, it surprised you too that even though his company didn’t lessen your guilt, it was the best way to distract you from it. And precisely, that was his intention.
He would sit next to you at meals, trying to convince the sisters around the table in all seriousness that because they were cloistered, they weren’t aware Earth had been invaded by aliens last year.
“Do you think we’re stupid?” a postulant asked, giggles escaping you at how ridiculous the conversation you were having was. “Some of us do go out sometimes, I think we would’ve noticed.”
“They want you to think everything’s normal because only an army of nuns can defeat them!”
“How do we know you’re not one of them, huh?” you played along, narrowing your eyes in suspicion while Jungkook placed a hand on his chest, feigning shock.
“Aunty will vouch for me but even if not, I can’t believe you’d doubt me. We’ve known each other for like, what, a week? That’s enough for me to follow you into battle.”
“Sorry but can’t be too careful during an alien invasion.”
“That I warned you about! Why would I say anything in the first place?”
“I’ve been here for many years,” an older nun chimed in from the other side of the table, making everyone turn their attention to her. She addressed Jungkook, “You’ve just reminded me why I joined the order.”
He blinked, dumbfounded. “Why, sister?”
“Men talk so much nonsense it makes my head hurt.”
To see Jungkook argue playfully about aliens and men with a seventy-year-old nun who was having none of his shit was an experience, but it wouldn’t be just that.
Like you’d told him, Father Jimin had allowed you to switch jobs. Your old one consisted of embellishing clothes with elaborate religious embroideries—hence why Sister Daeun had asked for your help with the torn habits—that would later be sold on a street market stall in town beside other products manufactured by your sisters, whereas your new one required almost no effort.
There was an old married couple nearby who ran a goat farm, and a small group of nuns from your convent helped them in exchange of a portion of the food they made, instead of a salary. Father Jimin was clearly trying his best to raise your spirits when he’d assigned you to tend to the cutest new-born goats, but it wasn’t until Jungkook tagged along and you saw him struggle with the baby bottles, spilling milk all over his clothes and cursing at the tiny animals, that the abbot’s goal was achieved.
“No, no, no, come back, you little shit!” He chased a hoppy kid around the barn, unable to contain that lovely high-pitched laugh.
“How are you making a mess out of literally the easiest thing in the world?” you teased from the bag of pine shavings you were sat on, another kid resting otherwise peacefully on your lap.
“That’s easy for you to say, I’ve got Psycho making me do cardio over here!”
“Try this one,” you giggled, motioning to the empty spot beside you with your head so Jungkook would sit down. When he did, you lay the kid on his lap carefully and brought the baby bottle to its mouth, both of you watching as it fed without any problem. “See?”
It didn’t take long for the milk to run out, after which you and Jungkook stroked the kid to sleep while the other one still hopped around, sharing a smile when your fingers accidentally brushed.
Because he’d tag along, you agreed to helping out in the kitchen on another day, as time was somehow bearable if he was there. But you were still going through the motions, your parents’ absence ever-present.
“What do you think?” Jungkook stirred you awake from your trance. “Bitchin’, right? The best thing you’ve ever heard?”
The song that got stuck in your head the day you met was playing on a boombox he’d brought from his van and put on the worktop while the two of you and three other sisters cooked lunch.
The girl you’d just heard, he had explained, was the band’s lead singer Amber, whom he sometimes joined apart from playing the guitar. There were also a Hoseok on the drums and a Taehyung on the bass. Bangtan, their name was. You’d never heard of them.
“I’m not sure about the lyrics,” meaning all the cursing and allusions to sex, which got your sisters flustered in the background, “but I like the tune.”
“The tune…”
“I’m just more used to church songs, is all.” Jungkook’s eyes lit up. “No.” You knew he was thinking exactly of blasting his rock songs in the middle of Mass.
“Why not?” he asked as a joke while trying to steal a couple of french fries from a dish. You slapped his hand before he could.
“Because Father Jimin will exile you, duh.”
“And don’t you think I’ll give up yet. I’ll be found outside your cell’s window playing music on my boombox until you agree to go out with me.” You should’ve cast away the heat before it reached your cheeks, as his flirting was obviously just for fun. Something he did with all girls and which meant nothing. “Better yet, I’ll write you a song.”
“I don’t think a novice is the perfect muse for a rock song, especially if it’s about…”
Jungkook shook his head. “I’ll keep it PG-13 for you, I promise.” He then grinned, rubbing his hands together. “I’ll start working on it tonight.”
You weren’t together at all times, though. No, you had class, he had work, sometimes you didn’t see him for whole days. Such was the case one cloudy afternoon around three weeks after first meeting, when Father Jimin approached you in the cloister. It had been a while since your last visit to his confessional box, so you feared a scolding.
“I wanted to talk to you, actually,” he said with that distinctive, soothing voice of his as you walked together, “about Jungkook.”
Your heart missed a beat for a reason that escaped your knowledge. It felt, somehow, as though you’d been caught doing something you shouldn’t. “What about him, Father?”
“I hadn’t seen you smile for a while and now it’s all you do when he’s by your side. I know the past month has been very difficult, so it makes me happy to see you get through the loss of your parents, Y/N.” Did it really look like things were fine? Well, better that than having everyone worry about you until things got fixed, if that ever happened. “However,” Father Jimin continued, “as your Spiritual Director, it’s my duty to advise you not to rely too much on someone other than God for solace. There’s a reason for enclosure, so that the outside world doesn’t distract us from religion. Unless… you’ve reconsidered your life as a nun? There’d be nothing wrong with that.”
What Jungkook had told you that first night, you’d been chewing on ever since, but God and your parents had long won the war. ‘Honour thy father and thy mother’ was one of the Ten Commandments, after all.
“I have no doubts. I belong here.”
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The last time you’d stepped in town had been for the funeral, but Bangtan was doing a gig at what Jungkook claimed was the coolest venue he’d ever been in and he’d managed to persuade the other members to perform Rock God, the song he’d pulled an all-nighter to write. You didn’t know what a title like that had to do with someone like you but apparently, the lyrics were from your point of view.
“You have to come,” he’d begged for the millionth time across the table the previous day, interrupting your Bible reading in the library. Luckily, nobody else was there, or had been before his arrival.
‘Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.’
Did that mean He would forgive you for the sin of going against your parents’ wishes? That you could hang the white veil and live how you dreamed of? The next passages from the Book of Isaiah answered those questions.
‘If ye be willing and obedient, ye shall eat the good of the land: But if ye refuse and rebel, ye shall be devoured with the sword: for the mouth of the Lord hath spoken it.’
In other words, you were fucked. There was no way out.
“I’d have to ask Father Jimin for permission, and I don’t think he’d let me go to a rock concert.”
You’d laughed to yourself at the idea but Jungkook had been serious, insisted, “Tell him you want to go buy groceries or something, he won’t say no to you.”
“You mean, ‘lie to him because he’ll take pity on you.’”
“Please.” He’d sank his elbows on the table, leaning so close you almost had to back away. You would have, had he not bewitched you with the most angelic of smiles. “Do it for me? I’ll tell Saint Peter I made you do it so he lets you in Heaven.”
That’s how you ended up in the queue for his concert, holding a plastic bag full of stationary you’d told Father Jimin you needed for class.
Jungkook had given you no ticket, said telling the security guy your name would suffice, and surely enough ‘Sister Y/N’ got you in. The habit had wisely been left at home, but the man still frowned at your modest outfit before putting a wristband on you that was a different colour than everyone else’s. You assumed it meant you were VIP.
There was a secluded area with round tables near the stage you were indeed taken to, where only a handful of other people were hanging out, waiting for the show to begin. You wouldn’t have thought of approaching them, as there was likely nothing you had in common, with them or anyone in the whole poorly lit venue. If you were there, out of your comfort zone, it was for Jungkook only.
The lights at some point changed colours and finally, the concert began. Bangtan got on the stage and performed song after song, giving their all to an audience that cheered loudly. You cheered too, captivated by a Jungkook who made you feel things with every look he gave you.
His blond hair was wet, whether with water, product, or sweat you didn’t know, but it dripped down his curls to his ripped clothes which allowed a glimpse of the inked skin of his torso. When had he got new tattoos? They weren’t there the day he’d got his t-shirt off for you to sew. You had never paid much attention to those that covered his veiny right arm and hand, but now you found yourself tickled by the fact, and wanting to see them up close. Definitely the tattoos, not his bare body… But most tantalising of all was the passionate way he played his electric guitar, moving around the stage with a confidence that made it clear he belonged there.
With that confidence, though, came a cockiness that had him eye-fucking every pretty girl in the crowd. Who’s to say he didn’t write songs for them too? Not to mention Amber, to whom he sometimes got so close you feared they were going to kiss—as did their fans, judging by their screams of excitement.
The last song of the night was Rock God, which he made sure to announce by enthusiastically mouthing you ‘This is it!’. You braced yourself for the lyrics.
Preacher man walked into the club, and he said He said, "Hey girl, can't you walk and not stray?" Father, I'm torn and I'm selling my soul to the Rhythm, the beat and the bass 'Cause I can't confess my rock and roll ways (Ooh) 'Cause I'm so possessed with the music The music he plays
Was the preacher man supposed to be Father Jimin? He wasn’t likely to walk in the venue right then, but the idea of him attending a rock concert was so absurd it made you smile. You guessed the tone of the song before Amber had even got to the chorus.
I can't stop my feet from dancing to the sound of his drum (Oh no) I fell in love with my rock god I can't keep my hips from swaying to his sweet melody You see, I fell in love with my rock, rock god
Oh, so not only did you like his music in this narrative, but you were also in love with him? You raised an eyebrow at that, to which he failed to bite down a smile. There must be thrill in succeeding to seduce a novice.
The next verse was similar to the first one. Then came the chorus again, twice, but it was the bridge that struck you, putting an end to the fun you were having. Jungkook watched your reaction closely, as he had during the whole song.
No, I wouldn't change a thing even if I could 'Cause I chose a path and I'm not looking back And I'm sorry if I left the angels crying over me
The chorus was sung twice more but the music muffled into the back of your mind, the bridge’s words lingering in the foreground. Would you be able to choose a path that resulted in your angels weeping? How could you? And how could Jungkook portray you as remorseless over it, when the matter was eating away at you inside?
The show was over before you knew it, and the audience slowly exited the venue while the band got out of their rockstars outfits and makeup backstage. About fifteen minutes later, they came into the area you were sat in and Jungkook bumped fists with the friends who’d come to see him in a rush, so as to not keep you waiting any longer.
Checking out your collared shirt and ankle-length skirt while approaching, he whistled. “Gee, Y/N, I can’t handle myself when you dress so sexy.”
“Because a novice’s habit is so much better.”
“There’s an appeal to it. Makes a man want to tempt you.” Earning a smile from him, you rolled your eyes. “Thoughts on the song. Shoot.”
You pouted. “Full of blasphemies. Are you supposed to be the rock god?”
“Who else?” Jungkook asked surprised. How did that escape you?
“Then why do I say ‘sound of his drum’? You’re a guitar player. Are you trying to set me up with your bandmate?”
“‘Guitar’ doesn’t rhyme with ‘god’,” he said matter-of-factly, it hitting him in the pause that followed. You laughed. “Well, yeah, neither does ‘drum’… but it does a bit more, right?”
“A bit more, yes. So, are you and Amber dating?”
Jungkook smirked. “Jealous much?”
“If you are,” you ignored his question, “she might not be too happy her boyfriend’s writing songs to other girls.”
“She has a boyfriend,” he cleared up, lifting a weight off your chest. “We’re just friends, what we do onstage is part of the show. Don’t worry, you don’t have to fight anyone to keep me.”
“What a relief,” you joked, taking a deep breath before continuing. “Listen, I’m gonna get going, it’s late and you said you were getting some drinks with Bangtan, so I’ll leave you to it. I had fun tonight, you did great.”
“I can drive you to the convent,” he offered, but you shook your head, picking the plastic bag up from the table.
“It’s alright, Sisters Joan and Theresa are still at their stall in the street market. I’ll go back with them.”
“Swell…” he said under his breath, hoping you couldn’t tell he’d wanted to say ‘bummer’ instead.
You didn’t see each other until the next night, when you broke the curfew yet again to hang out in the kitchen. Sat on the table, the two of you discussed your dilemma while sipping at the awful tea Jungkook had made. There weren’t many ways to fuck up tea, but he’d still managed it, holding the old kettle responsible.
All had begun with him pointing out you’d paled towards the end of Rock God and you telling him the lyrics had moved you because you’d chosen to finish your novitiate. There was no way, therefore, you could sell your soul to the rhythm, the beat, and the bass.
“I know I said I wouldn’t tell you what to do, but–”
“You did.”
“But hear me out. Now that we’re friends, I can’t just watch you make a decision I know you already regret.”
“I’d regret leaving too, at least this is the selfless choice.”
“Well, aren’t you a good person!” Jungkook’s mocking made you sigh and sip on your tea like it were alcohol. It did taste as bad. “Y/N, you need to live for yourself, not for two fuddy-duddies who couldn’t put their daughter’s happiness before theirs.”
“Don’t be mean to them.”
Jungkook only bit his tongue because of your pleading tone. “Sorry… Even if you loved your parents, you can’t deny they put you in a tough spot. I’m sure wherever they are, they’ve realised they were wrong and want you to be happy however you choose.”
“The thing is, they were convinced I’d be happy as a nun, that I just wanted to switch to secular on a whim. That’s why they ordered me to stay, they were looking out for me.” Jungkook almost grimaced at the word ‘ordered’, fought against commenting how messed up was the fact that you were using it in this context. Staring at the almost empty mug on your lap, you wondered whether it was insensitive of you to speak your mind. “It’s also what’s happened to you that I couldn’t bear happening to me, even if my parents are gone. I don’t want to do anything that would make them spurn me. I don’t want them not to love me,” your voice broke despite your best efforts.
Jungkook immediately stole the mug from your fingers and put it next to his on the table, so he could hold your hands. “Listen to me, my parents are assholes. Like, genuine bad people who shouldn’t’ve been allowed to have a kid. I won’t tell you the things they’ve said and done to me because you’d cry, but they are a different breed. Normal parents love their children no matter what. Why do you think yours would spurn you if they were still alive, instead of realising that they were making you unhappy?”
Good point, actually. If only it wasn’t far more complicated than that…
The second Jungkook withdrew his hands, you missed their warmth, even though it was a hot summer night. He sipped at his tea, and you suspected he only mmm-ed with delight to make you laugh, given he bloody well knew its taste was disgusting. Idiot.
“Just promise me one thing,” he added, a smirk tugging at his lips. “If you quit being a novice, go out on a date with me.”
Now, that made you laugh. “A date?”
Jungkook nodded, anchoring his foot to one of the legs of your chair so he could drag it close to his and rest his arm on its top rail, the proximity such that you could feel his breathing against your cheek. Heart racing, you crossed your arms and tried your hardest to appear unbothered. “I’ll pick you up at five and we’ll go roller-skating until we can’t feel our legs, then we’ll have dinner in my van while we watch a drive-in movie– A scary one, so you cling onto me for safety. Then I’ll drive you home, walk you to your door, and you’ll go ‘Oh! It’s too late, why don’t you stay over?’. So we’ll have some drinks, and you’ll take my hand to lead me into your bedroom, and then…”
“And then we’ll say our prayers and go to sleep.”
“To sleep, yes,” Jungkook chuckled, “afterwards.”
“I don’t know what makes you think I wouldn’t live almost like a nun if I left here. I am, in fact, a Catholic.”
“A relaxed one, I dare say. Oh, come on. You’ve never thought about breaking your faith’s rules? Not even to have fun?” He raised his eyebrows, waiting for a confession, but you shook your head.
“I can have fun without breaking the rules, I always have.”
Jungkook nibbled at his lip for a while, mentally debating with himself. Whichever of the voices in his head won, it made him say, “What if I showed you my ways? Would you be up for that?”
“Up for what, exactly?”
“You’ll see.”
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Due to the series of communal prayers scattered throughout the day called Liturgy of Hours, it was as early as five that the whole convent got up. You’d usually go straight back to bed after the first one and get what more rest you could until it was time for class or work, but today, despite it being Sunday, a few sisters had volunteered to go to the farm and help around, you and Jungkook joining them to nanny the goats.
You didn’t mind getting your habit dirty there, but it was being an awfully hot July, which was the reason why you were wearing lighter clothes that morning when walking into the chapel alongside Jungkook to attend Mass. He was an atheist whom you supposed only went to these things to spend more time with you, and that warmed your heart.
Ever since you’d started hanging out, the same less devout sisters who’d previously flocked around him had gone back to the handsome abbot’s orbit, so the nearer pews to the altar had quickly been taken. Together, you sat alone at the back, the pew all to yourselves. Three quite tall sisters were sat in the one in front of you and acted as a barrier Father Jimin hid behind of, but as long as you heard him, it didn’t matter.
Your mind went elsewhere no more than a couple of minutes into the service anyway. Tuning out seemed to be easy as of late.
It was just so unfair, all of it. You could be learning in university, meeting new people, living a normal life where you wouldn’t need to ask an abbot for permission to go out if you fancied taking a fucking walk! It didn’t have to mean you’d stop practising your religion or let yourself fall into sin at all, nothing had to change in that regard. You took a deep breath charged with frustration. If only your parents hadn’t decided to take the car in the middle of a storm and you’d had more time to make them see reason… Why did they have to die? Why did God have to take them and leave you alone?
Right in the middle of your brooding was when Jungkook put his hand on your bare knee and asked in a whisper, “Hey, are you okay?”
You forced a smile that he didn’t seem convinced by, so his hand remained on the same spot after he’d gone back to paying attention to Mass. His touch didn’t make you uncomfortable, you welcomed it and the comfort it provided, but your jaw did drop when it slowly travelled down your inner thigh, towards your intimate area.
“What are you doing?” you mouthed, petrified at the possibility of anyone noticing. Luckily, the only person facing the pews was Father Jimin, who couldn’t see a thing from the altar thanks to your barrier-sisters.
“Showing you my idea of fun,” Jungkook leaned in to whisper, lips brushing against your earlobe. It wasn’t that what made you gulp, though, but the fact that he reached your clit and rubbed it softly over your linen shorts, up and down, side to side… The unexpected pleasure made your breath hitch in your throat, gaze flying around the chapel at the speed of light. “No one’s watching,” Jungkook reassured you. “Live a little, Y/N.” Feeling his middle finger now press your clit firmly and at an increasing pace, you looked at him, shocked there was no sign of shame on his features, eyes half-lidded with arousal as they studied your worried ones. “Tell me to stop and I will.”
Stop? You were still registering something had started there, in a sacred place, during Mass! What you were letting Jungkook do to you was all kinds of sinful, but… it felt so good you couldn’t bring yourself to say anything. Sobering up, he ceased his actions at that lack of consent, and was going to withdraw his hand and apologise had you not grabbed it and kept it in place down there, much to the surprise of both.
Relief showed on Jungkook in the form of an exhale. He wasted no time, then, sliding his hand inside your shorts and underwear, making you bite down on your lip when he found your clit once more and rubbed it in circles. He lingered there just enough to make your core pulsate with ache when he abandoned it to move on to your wet slit, something you had to slouch for him to do. He eased two fingers inside you that he began pumping in and out with a mastery that got you squirming in your seat, hand glued to your mouth to hold back the moans that threatened to escape it and gaze locked on the tattooed sleeve that disappeared inside your shorts.
That was when everyone started singing a hymn. Jungkook took the chance to quicken his movements, the sounds of your irregular breathing and his fingers sliding into your juices eclipsed by the song. He licked his lips, coating them with saliva before leaving chaste kisses on your neck, knowing if his tongue met it he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from fucking you right there and then. When he pulled back, he noticed you’d closed your eyes to get lost in the pleasure, and that they opened only when you felt his breath near your parted lips, to stare down at his. So close, yet he restrained the urge to kiss you, intent on watching you come.
He didn’t have to wait long, your walls now clenching around his fingers every time he rubbed that magical spot, thighs shaking as a result. All the tension built up inside of you suddenly released, and you dissolved into a daze just in time for the ending of the hymn. Not to overstimulate you, Jungkook gently removed his fingers and slipped out of the chapel. He returned a minute later with his hand washed and dry, and although you readily intertwined fingers with his when he reached out, you dared not meet his eyes after what had just happened.
That night you lay awake tossing and turning forever, unable to forget the feel of his touch.
Inexplicably, you weren’t ashamed of all the sins you’d added to the collection that day: falling into the temptation of lust, doing pre-marital sexual acts that didn’t lead to procreation, breaching your vow of chastity, desecrating a holy place, taking the sacrament while in mortal sin… Somehow, you just weren’t. You were, right after, but now it was as though you’d managed to sweep all the guilt related to it under the rug. As for the one related to your parents, well, Jungkook had been the sweetest distraction from it.
A distraction you craved again.
You must have been held sway by a demon when you got up from bed to go find Jungkook, but you were in no hurry to free yourself from its grasp.
Except for the first night, he tended to be the sleepless one who wandered about the abbey until you eventually joined him, so you knew he’d be awake. Indeed, he was on the phone in the community room, getting tangled up in the cord as he paced around, nervous. He couldn’t see you lurking in the hallway’s shadows, so you decided to let curiosity get the better of you and eavesdrop the conversation he was having.
“No, you’re not following,” he whispered into the phone. “My cousin’s friend’s brother is into this hot religious girl, and I– he! sort of fingered her in public… In a church… No, there were people present, it was in the middle of Mass… Nobody, that I’m– that he’s aware… No, Hoseok, it’s not dope! He’s going up and down the walls like a fucking yoyo... He isn’t so sure it was a good idea, fears he might’ve crossed a line… Well, he hasn’t seen her since, I think she’s been avoiding him– Agh, he thinks!... Fuck yeah, she did, and he loved it too… The problem is that I don’t want her to regret it and feel bad about it just because it wasn’t the time or place, or to never want to have sex because I got her into it the wrong way… What? He, I said he… You’re right,” he sighed, putting an end to his pacing. “I’ll tell him. Thank you, bro... ‘Night.”
Arms crossed, you couldn’t help but smile fondly. He was that worried about it? You should’ve known, you were friends after all. That was all he probably wanted to be, at least. Friends. With benefits, but friends. Who would want to be more than that not only with a novice, but with one as troubled as you?
A noise made you look up. It was Jungkook, now by the window, flicking his lighter over and over to pass the time. Your eyes inspected his fingers under the moonlight, the same ones he’d buried inside you that morning, and the longing that had got you out of bed returned to move your feet in his direction. You must’ve been abrupt while approaching him, though, as he jolted with a gasp at the sight of you.
“Sorry.”
“Y/N…” he said as he caught his breath from the startle. He had hoped you’d show up, but not so suddenly. Payback, he thought, for the way we met. “Listen, about earlier–”
You cut his sentence short with a kiss. It was soft at first, as timid as you felt, but Jungkook soon got over the shock that had frozen him and took charge of the matter, pulling you in a tight embrace. His tongue entered your mouth and swirled around yours like it was always meant to, or at least that’s what you wanted to believe. How else could it feel so good, and Jungkook so addictive?
It was a challenge, but you found the strength to step back and whisper so lowly that he almost didn’t hear, “I want you.”
“Are you sure?” Jungkook cupped your face with both hands, forcing you to look into his eyes. No need for that, they already had you enthralled, dark with the desire you’d infected him with.  
“Yes,” you exhaled, taking his hands in yours to lead him upstairs. “With you, yes.”
Once in your cell, you lost your pyjamas in a matter of seconds, both too impatient to feel each other.
Being naked and seeing Jungkook so was initially nerve-racking but once you were under the sheets, under his toned body, your bashfulness flew out the window. Especially when you saw his dick, already hard from just making out—you figured he’d been charged up since the morning. Yet his priority wasn’t his own pleasure, but yours, not an inch of your skin left untouched by his lips as he slowly travelled downwards. Until you started giggling out of nowhere, and Jungkook raised his head from in between your boobs to look at you in confusion.
“Your Barbie hair is tickling me,” you teased him as you tucked behind his ears the blond cascade that covered his face and grazed over your chest whenever he moved.
“Barbie, huh?” Jungkook whispered next to your ear only to lay a warm kiss right under it, all while he positioned himself in between your legs. “Do you want me to tickle you somewhere else?”
“Actually, I…” How did one say such a thing? “I want to tickle you, but I don’t know what to do.”
He chuckled, “My pleasure to instruct you.”
You did as he said and reclined next to him, upside down so he could touch you—he’d insisted—while you sucked him off. It did feel strange to take him in your mouth and run your tongue along the length of his shaft, at least until you heard his breathing speed up, resisting to buck his hips into your face as he was. Your cunt throbbed, and you wished Jungkook’s cock was inside it instead of your mouth. He seemed to sense that, so his hand soon crept between your thighs to remedy your ails, a whine escaping you then.
“You’re just as tight as earlier, fuck,” he groaned from the pillow as his fingers struggled to curl and uncurl inside of you, given you couldn’t keep still. It made you all the more eager to pleasure him, taking him as deep as you could so he saw the same stars you were beginning to see yourself. “You’re doing so well… That’s it, suck it harder, darling, ah… Wait, stop, stop!”
Immediately, you backed off. “Did I do something wrong?”
Jungkook sat up and used his thumb to wipe the drooling trail of saliva on your chin. “You were doing too well, miss.” Ogling your body, he licked his thumb. “Why don’t you come over here?” You nodded, would’ve agreed to do anything he asked in that moment.
He lay down again while holding your hands to guide you over to his lap, over his erection, but your sudden nerves made you shy away. Nevertheless, Jungkook pulled you closer with a smirk. “Where are you running off to?”
“I’m sorry, just… Will it hurt?”
He sat up to peck your lips cutely, “Oh, it will be excruciatingly painful,” and you pushed his chest with an eye-roll, so he returned to his previous position. He grabbed the condom he’d stopped by his cell to get before following you to yours and put it on.
A deep breath later, you grabbed his cock and placed its tip in your wet entrance, looking down at it to make sure you were doing it right. Hands between his head and the pillow, Jungkook watched patiently, turned on by your inexperience and the fact that he and he alone got to be the one to pop your cherry, make you break your vow of chastity. He thought it’d take you a while to get used to the size of his dick, but you surprised him by rolling your hips almost aggressively the second you sat on it, chasing pleasure as though it would escape from your grasp otherwise.
“Shit, yes, like that.” All flushed under you and with his eyes barely open, feeling the way you moved with all his senses, Jungkook ignited a lust in you that even an angel would be willing to fall from grace for.
“Oh my God, it feels so good…”
“I know, baby.” He wanted to dig his nails into your hips and move them back and forth himself but found that for a virgin, you were already doing a superb job, laughed instead. “Look at you, fuck. What a dirty bitch, you’re loving it.”
“I am…” you panted, his name-calling sending you over the edge. “Jesus, I am.”
It wasn’t long until Jungkook felt your walls clench tight around him, something he didn’t blame you for as he himself was close too. His cock had been burning in his pants ever since Mass, even after he’d jerked himself off in his cell when the service had finished and you’d vanished. Grabbing your wrist, he pulled you close to his mouth and kissed you hungrily, but even then, you refused to stop moving, felt too good. “Gonna come already? You like me that bad?”
I like you a lot. You were having a tough time not moaning, especially when he talked. His deep voice did all manner of things to you. “I’m so close, ah...”
“Why don’t I help you out with that, hm?”
He didn’t wait for an answer before bending his knees and repeatedly thrusting into you with such force that it had you gasping for air. If you’d known he could fuck you like that, you’d have asked him to be on top at the beginning. Eyes squeezed shut, you buried your head in the crook of his neck to moan against it as you came, finally letting go. Jungkook bit into your shoulder, not to hurt you, just hard enough to keep himself from grunting loudly as he found his own release after a few more thrusts, but your bodies remained locked until your heartbeats slowed down.
It didn’t hit you how loud your panting had been until your breath toned down and there was silence in the room. You prayed it hadn’t woken anybody up.
At some point, you got off Jungkook for him to remove his condom and go throw it in the bin next to your desk. You covered your naked body with the sheets, expecting to next see him get dressed, but he lay back on the bed. You didn’t understand.
“Aren’t you leaving?”
He scoffed. “Kicking me out, ouch. Why would I leave?”
“I thought… that’s what guys do.” At least, that was what your non-virgin sisters had told you. That men lost interest in a woman as soon as they’d had their way with her.
Jungkook shook his head as he said softly, “I’m not going anywhere.” Having sex surely messed with one’s head, there was no other explanation as to why you blushed like a teenager. The two of you got on your side, facing each other, and Jungkook started caressing your arm with the back of his fingers, the simple action so soothing you thought you’d fall asleep. “Is this nice?”
“Very,” you replied, eyes closing against your will.
“Did I go too far earlier?”
You were taken aback by the sudden question. “Maybe, but I liked it. You were right about breaking the rules. Looking back… I think it was what you said about living a little that got to me. Here at the convent, I don’t really feel alive, but I do when we’re this close.”
“See?” Jungkook asked gently, trying to make you see his point. “What’s stopping you from quitting, then? Nothing should cost you feeling alive.”
“Apart from my parents?” you sighed. “Look around. As a novice, I couldn’t receive their inheritance. Vow of poverty, remember? What you see in this cell is everything I own.” Jungkook had already noticed on his way in your lack of personal belongings. A cross hung over the bed, a small pile of religious books on the desk, a framed photo of you with your family, and little more. It was so empty and cold that anyone would’ve thought you’d just moved in. “I can’t afford to go to university, much less live on my own.”
“Well… I’ve been saving up for a while and I’m moving in an apartment with Hoseok and Tae when summer’s over. Why don’t you come stay with us? I’m sure they won’t mind!” he said enthusiastically, eyes sparkling like he’d come up with the solution to all your problems. “I’ll help you find a job and you’ll be able to afford uni, easy-peasy.”
You were too sleepy to chuckle, but a faint smile did tug at your lips because of how determined he was to fix things. Things that were too broken to be fixed. “Let’s not talk about this right now, please?”
Even though Jungkook wasn’t pleased with your response, he forced a smile. “Why, did I tire you out?” Leaning in, he kissed your lips lightly. “You’re right, let’s not ruin the moment. Come here.”
He had you rest your head on his chest, and held lovingly, you fell asleep.
Understandably, he’d left by the time you woke up. If anyone saw him coming out of your cell, they might work out what he’d been up to there and the two of you would be kicked out of the convent. His scent lingered in your sheets, but it didn’t make any less disappointing waking up without him by your side. What’s more, as you put on your habit after having a quick shower, you were assailed by the most heart-breaking questions.
What if Jungkook had pretended to be your friend only to get in your pants? What if, now he’d got what he wanted, he blew you off? What if you’d risked everything for a guy who felt nothing for you?
To your immense relief, when you walked into the refectory for breakfast, he waved at you with a smile and gestured you to sit next to him. You were going to before Father Jimin suddenly appeared before you.
“Good morning, Y/N,” he greeted warmly, as ever.
“Oh, good morning, Father!”
“I wanted to make sure everything’s okay.”
You blinked. “It is, why?”
Shit. He knows?
“You left the chapel in a hurry after Mass yesterday,” he said, “and you didn’t show up to the remaining services. Were you unwell?”
“Oh... Yes, I was.” If you had locked yourself up in your cell, it was for no other reason than to avoid Jungkook and digest the fact that he’d fingered you in public. You lied, “I was sick all day, but I’m fine now.”
“I’m glad,” Jimin said with a smile you returned, then grabbed your hand to surround it with both of his, like old people will. “I know this comes out of nowhere, but I’m really proud of you, Y/N. For pulling through these challenging times. Many, including myself, can only learn from your strength. I know you’ll make a great nun.”
He gave your hand a soft squeeze and left you there, frozen in your spot. It was as though your sins finally dawned on you, all of them at once. You’d really believed leaving the convent didn’t have to mean you’d betray your faith and here you were, sleeping with a guy you’d met barely a month ago without shame because that made you feel alive.
What had you done? What were you turning into?
No longer hungry, you left to go back to your cell, tears already streaming down your cheeks before you made it out of the empty hallways. Or were they empty?
“Y/N!” You ignored Jungkook’s voice and quickened your pace, too ashamed to face him. “Hey, wait up!” He sprinted to reach you, concern shaping his features when he blocked your way and realised you were crying and trying to hide it from him. One thing was telling him your troubles, another to break down like a pathetic, helpless little girl. In the most caring tone, he asked, “Hey, what’s wrong?”
You explained, told him how you felt.
“I’m letting Father Jimin down,” you sobbed. “Him, my parents, God, and everyone.”
“You’re not,” Jungkook kept repeating. “You’re in a period of discernment, right? So who says you can’t reach a conclusion by trial and error? That’s what other nuns have done too. Before they got here, yes, but it was doing things they later regretted that convinced them to become nuns.”
“I don’t regret last night,” you said in all honesty, “but I do hate that I don’t regret sinning... You just can’t understand, you’re not religious.”
Jungkook looked down. “Maybe I can’t, but if I know something it’s that if what we did made you happy, it shouldn’t be a sin.” He looked around to make sure no one else was there before cupping your wet cheeks and kissing you, every muscle in your body relaxing under his touch as he knew they would. “Now come with me and eat something.”
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He didn’t fully convince you, but your will wasn’t strong enough to resist his tempting.
For the next three weeks, you continued sleeping together at night, pretending you were no more than close friends at day. Whatever the time, Jungkook made sure to spend as much of it as possible with you, although not for a moment did you ever let yourself believe he had any feelings for you other than sexual. You weren’t even sure you wanted him to develop them, truth be told, as this thing you had was a fling. Come the end of summer less than a month from now, he’d move out and you’d start the second and final year of your novitiate, so whatever it was between you had no future.
Still, he kept writing you songs.
Some he’d sing quietly in bed so you’d fall asleep listening to his angelic voice, but the latest one, Church, he’d also asked you to come see him perform in a concert. And so, you’d lied to Father Jimin again, claiming the ancient kettle in the kitchen was broken and a new one needed to be bought. What’s a sin more to secure your one-way ticket to Hell?
Jungkook had warned you this song was not PG-13. He’d be the one singing it, not Amber, and he’d begged and begged you to wear one of his huge t-shirts to the concert with nothing underneath, refusing to tell you why. Leaving the abbey dressed as modestly as was expected of a novice, you changed outfits in the venue’s toilets. You didn’t know why you’d agreed to it but the first line of Church explained his request.
You're wearing nothing but my t-shirt Call me shallow but I'm only getting deeper, yeah Stay on the ground until your knees hurt No more praying, baby, I'ma be your preacher
He half whispered the whole verse into the microphone, all while his eyes pierced yours from the stage. You couldn’t look away either, entranced by his voice and presence. So far from where you were sat, how could he make you feel as though the air had run out in the whole venue?
And I'll keep leading you on If you keep leading me into your room The drinks are all gone But that's fine, baby, so am I
You remembered the date Jungkook had talked about taking you out on and how… standard it now sounded to you as he turned his attention to the girls who cheered for him in the audience. Was it scripted? Something he said to all of them to lead them on? The more you thought about it, the more you realised he’d never actually take you skating. No, you were just for keeping his nights busy.
His gaze found you again.
I'm about to take you back to church (back to church) Well, tell me your confessions, baby, what's the worst? Yeah Baptise in your thighs 'til it hurts (you know it hurts) 'Cause I'm about to take you back to church (oh yeah)
I'll keep you up until the sunset Speaking in tongues, yeah, we ain't done yet (yeah) Don't take my verses out of context I know it's weighing on your conscience
Those last two lines… Further confirmation your relationship was just sex and that you shouldn’t read too much into anything he said, or feel guilty for sinning by having a friend-with-benefits. It was self-contradictory of you to feel down about him not reciprocating your feelings, but you did. Don’t they say love is irrational?
Despite how sad you’d got, the night didn’t end with the concert, but with Jungkook fucking you without restrain. When he was inside you, nothing else mattered.
You were in the back of his van, parked somewhere near the abbey yet not enough for anyone to hear the loud moans that each of his thrusts caused, even with the windows open not to melt in there.
“Fuck, keep moaning for me,” he grunted, gripping your waist to keep you in place.
“Keep fucking me, then…” Jungkook scoffed, would’ve commented on how dirty he’d turned you had he not been so close. You’d come already yourself, but were more than glad to let him go on until he did too.
“Since you’ve got such a big mouth,” he said, panting, “why don’t you put it to good use?”
It took him most of his willpower to pull out and remove his condom. You sat up and opened your mouth for him to shove his hard cock in, swirling your tongue around the tip before closing your lips tight around it and starting to bob your head to take all of him. A bit more experienced now and having learned to love sucking Jungkook, you knew exactly how he liked it done. You could feel it, his cock twitching against your tongue as you savoured it, letting you know he was going to come.
He pulled back again to jerk himself, and you began rubbing your clit, aroused again by the sight between your spread legs. “I thought you were done?”
“Yes, but you’re so hot…” you moaned, and he huffed out a laugh. Biting his lip harshly as he ogled your naked body and the way you touched yourself, it wasn’t long until he came all over your thighs, your own release following.
Jungkook smirked when he was no longer out of breath. “Dreams do come true.” He was staring at your thighs dripping with his cum and your own juices, and you realised he was talking about Church’s ‘baptise in your thighs’. You were about to smile when the rest of the song came to mind, and suddenly you didn’t feel like it anymore… Once Jungkook had cleaned you up with a cloth, he lay down next to you. “Come here.”
You always hoped he’d say that, even though he never failed to. So resting your back on his chest, he held you from behind, caressing your hands in a comfortable silence. It was then that you noticed the blank spot between the tattoos in Jungkook’s wrist. It was tiny, but seemed intentional.
“Are you not inking this bit?”
“I’m saving it for a small symbol, maybe a letter.” He kissed your temple. “Your name’s initial, what do you say?”
Your lips committed to it before your brain did. “Do you get tattoos of the others?”
Jungkook frowned. You couldn’t see him, but you knew he did. “What others?”
“The other girls you sleep with.” There was no jealousy in your casual tone, but it was still petty. Jungkook shifted so he could face you. He was indeed frowning, both perplexed and offended.
“There are no others,” he promised, serious as you’d ever seen him. “You trust me that little?”
“I didn’t think I had to trust you. Aren’t we just hooking up?”
Jungkook rubbed his eyes as if the confusion was giving him a headache. “You thought I was sleeping with other girls and said nothing?”
By what right could you ask him to be faithful in a relationship you planned to end soon? Besides, what if in doing so, you annoyed him enough to stop wanting to be friends? If sharing him with others was the only way to have him, it hurt, but you’d do it. You looked down as you whispered, kind of embarrassed, “I guess I do like you that much…”
Jungkook raised your chin with his curled index finger, made you look at him. He despised the sadness he saw in the depths of your eyes, the one you were trying to repress. “You’re much more than sex to me. I worship you and if I could, I’d spend every waking moment next to you.”
In a small pause, you tried to rack your brain. “Is that from a song?”
“No, but it should be. I’ll write it down later.” Jungkook nodded, agreeing the rhyme had potential. Still, he wasn’t going to let you change the subject. “Y/N, I’m in love with you.”
He is?  That did take you off guard.
“You shouldn’t be, I’m a novice,” you said anyway at your most hypocritical.
Jungkook sighed, “What’s so wrong about it? Don’t you love me?”
You didn’t want to lie to him. A smile made your lips stretch before you answered, “I do,” and softly, Jungkook kissed them. Every time he pulled back from a kiss, it felt like it had been too short, no matter how long it lasted. Like you needed more because you could never be sated of him. “Does this mean… we’re dating?”
“I mean, you’re technically engaged to Jesus, and I’m not a guy who likes sharing,” Jungkook joked before giving you a peck and returning to his previous position under you. “If you don’t wanna be just lovers, you’ll have to break up with him first.”
You answered nothing. Should you listen to him, though?
Around two weeks of bliss sprang from your love confessions, where it became hard to pretend you weren’t mad for each other in public, such as when he’d whisper in your ear how provocative you looked in your habit and you giggled like a schoolgirl in love—which, technically, you were. Your parents barely made it into your thoughts, as they were filled to the brim with Jungkook.
From the moment they were over, it all went downhill. Worse, it fell into an abyss.
You had just come out of class with other novices when your hand was grabbed by someone who dragged you through the hallway to head upstairs. “Sorry to steal her, sisters, it’s urgent!”
“Jungkook, what are you doing?” you asked as he led you into your cell in a rush, closing the door for privacy. “You can’t be in here during the day–”
“I’ve found a way.” Only then did you notice how excited he was, a grin across his face. “A way to pay for your university.”
His aunt had been the one to tell him, at the beginning of the summer, that he must plan ahead as an adult now that his parents had turned their back on him, but it wasn’t until he fell for you that he actually started doing that. He was sure he wanted you to be by his side on whatever path he took, for his future to merge with yours somehow.
You, however, knew this conversation would not end well. “Enlighten me.”
“Bangtan is going on a nationwide tour next year.”
“Oh my God, that’s great!” You held his hands and grinned with him. “I’m so happy for you.”
“Y/N, this means I’ll earn a lot of money.” Then, you looked away. “With what I’ve got saved up plus that, you can afford to go to uni, even a private one, and we don’t have to live with the boys, we can have a place of our own! On the road we won’t even have to sweat about that, our company will pay for everyth–”
You freed your hands from his grasp, said with a nervous laugh, “You’re going a bit fast, Jungkook…”
His grin faded. “What do you mean? Isn’t money what you need to get out of here?”
“I’m grateful you want to take care of me but I can’t leave, you know why.”
“Are you serious right now?” Jungkook couldn’t believe it. “Y/N, your parents are gone. I know it’s hard but you have to move on, I don’t want you to wither in this place when you have a chance at happiness.”
“Just because you chose to let your parents down doesn’t mean the rest of us want to.” You regretted those words as soon as they left your mouth, the sound of Jungkook’s heart breaking reaching your ears. Or was it your own?
It took him some long seconds to process you’d said that, then answer, “I told you how they were to me, forgive me for not giving a shit about them.”
“Well, mine are a different story. I do care about them.”
“And not about us? We can’t be together anymore after I leave the convent. Have you not thought about that, or were you going to end things like they meant nothing? Because for weeks, I’ve been trying to find a way to have a future with you.”
“I never asked you to,” you sighed, welling up. You might not have, but a part of you had wanted to. Wanted to go with him too. “There’s no way we can have a future together.”
Jungkook teared up as well, and you hated yourself for it. He was being met with unjust meanness from the person he genuinely loved. You sucked so bad.
“What am I to you, then? What have I been these past months?”
“A distraction.”
It wasn’t a lie, and that’s what hurt the most. You loved Jungkook, and yet, you’d used him to set aside the pain of your parents’ loss and the guilt that was consuming you for being a sinner. You were always going to dispose of him like a toy outgrown, regardless of everything he’d done for you.
He stared for a while, but you couldn’t meet his eyes out of shame. “That’s good to know,” he muttered before storming out, leaving you in a puddle of tears you deserved to be drowned in.
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You trudged your way to class after a grey morning in the library. There was still no passage from any religious book that excused your countless sins and promised the salvation of your blighted soul, but that didn’t worry you so much right now. What did, was Jungkook.
He was likely avoiding you—for which you couldn’t blame him—though you doubted meeting and apologising for the ugly things you’d said would be a remedy to the damage done. Not that you didn’t mean them, but they could’ve been said with tact. Jungkook’s wicked crime was loving you, after all.
So busy were you missing something as random as his cologne that you didn’t notice until the end of the class that everyone kept stealing glances at you, whispering to each other afterwards. Even if a tired demeanour wasn’t deserving of such a disproportionate reaction, you still blamed the barely two hours of sleep you’d got for your sisters’ scandalised looks, but another novice approached you in the hallway out of pity to let you know you’d actually made the convent’s news.
You froze in your spot when she said it was because Jungkook had spread the rumour that you’d been sleeping with him.
No, please... Tell me he hasn’t.
Leaving your sister where she stood and running off to find him with the disapproving gaze of every other person you passed burning into your skin, you prayed you were inside a nightmare harder with each stride.
Jungkook couldn’t have betrayed you. Someone must have seen or heard you and put two and two together, right?
Such theory turned into dust when you saw him sat in the cloister surrounded by girls like the day you’d met, playing a melody in the guitar for their attentive ears. Somehow, you knew he’d done it then, and on purpose. You started to feel sick as you approached them, whether because of the summer heat or the knife stabbed and twisted in your back, you didn’t know.
“We need to talk.”
Jungkook didn’t bother to look up as he said, “If we were still dating, I’d totally be shaking at that sentence, Y/N.”
Some of your sisters giggled, others bit their lip not to. You went red, begged, “Please.”
Albeit reluctantly, he stood up and followed you to an empty hallway. You didn’t know whether you were more upset, scared, surprised, or disappointed, but the smell of the cologne you were missing earlier managed to calm you down a little, as Jungkook’s company tended to do. Your stupid body seemed to not have caught up on the fact that he was the cause of your hurting.
“What do you want?” he asked curtly.
“What do I want? To know how you could tell everyone about us, Jungkook, how you could do this to me. I’ll be expelled! And I don’t have parents or a family that will take me back if I go apologise to them, I have nowhere to go. Is that what you want? For me to be with you because I have no other choice?”
“Of course not, we’re done,” Jungkook assured you that wasn’t his plan, which you believed. He hated your guts, his dark eyes told you. “But now you’re not tied to a place you don’t really want to be in.”
“Oh, don’t pretend you didn’t do this out of revenge.”
“So what if I did?”
You stared at him for a while, speechless like he had the time you’d last met. “And here I thought you’d proved me wrong.”
“In what,” Jungkook asked in a scoff, “becoming a nun now that you’ve been dicked down?”
The coldness of his tone stung your heart. In disbelief, you shook your head. “No, in that there was more to you than what first meets the eye.”
A grain of shock broke through the mask of indifference Jungkook was wearing, probably because your words weren’t visibly said against your better judgement this time, but while seeing him through the same lenses as his parents did. You looked at him just like them the night they’d kicked him out, in a way he had hoped you never would.
And how could you not? You’d thought you knew him, yet he’d gone ahead and ruined your life. Maybe you never did know the real Jungkook at all, who was now too taken aback to come up with an answer before another novice approached.
“Father Jimin wants to see you, sister,” she said, after which you took a deep breath, nodded, and followed her without so much as giving Jungkook one last glance.
In his office, sat on his desk, Father Jimin was quiet. Had been so since you’d come in and sat down.
One of his elbows rested on his chair’s arm and two fingers pressed on his closed lips as he thought of what to say. You already had an idea of what it would be, and it made you no more ready, fists clutching the skirt of your lap.
“I don’t know what to say,” he finally confessed in a sigh. It struck you how it was the first time in the few years you’d known Father Jimin that you didn’t see a smile on his face, or at least friendliness. He was the kind of person who always saw the best in people but right now, there was nothing good left in you. “I’m truly at a loss for words. I never thought you’d do something like this, or that I’d find out from other mouths.”
Tears blurred your sight at the memory of him telling you he was proud of you. “I know I have no right to ask for forgiveness, but I’m begging you, Father. It was the mistake of my life–”
“You broke your vows, Y/N. Defiled a holy place.” Oh… Jungkook had admitted to that as well? Chin trembling, you pressed your lips together not to cry. “Lied to me about it and God knows what else… This behaviour cannot be tolerated. You can stay in the abbey until you find a job and a place to live, but you are dismissed from this community, if not excommunicated.”
You sobbed, unable to hold it in anymore, “Father, please. I can’t let my parents down, their last wish was that I become a nun–”
“Isn’t it your wish? Were you lying about that too?” Your head lowered in shame and Father Jimin leaned back into his chair with a loud sigh. “You should have thought about your parents before getting involved with Jungkook. Be grateful they aren’t here to see you stray this bad.” He waited for you to say something, but shame kept you from it, as he was right. “You may leave now.”
Everything had happened so fast that a week later, you were still assimilating it.
Except when necessary, you barely left your cell. Dreaded both the judgemental looks of your sisters and the non-existent ones from Father Jimin, who ignored your presence whenever he had to suffer it in the chapel or the refectory. Not to mention running into Jungkook. To your knowledge, he’d been kicked out too, was sometimes seen moving boxes from his cell to his van. There wasn’t much for him to pack, so you guessed he was dragging the process. What for, you tried not to care.
That was the main reason why, helped by the yellow pages, you’d been job-hunting through the telephone. Not that it was better or worse than going in person, because nobody wanted to employ an ex-novice anyway. They literally hung up when you mentioned you’d been expelled from the convent—as expected, to be honest—but lying again was not an option. You’d learned your lesson the hard way.
Eventually, you did manage to land an interview for a job. Given it didn’t pay that well, it’d be a while until you could afford to move out of the abbey and even longer until you’d step in a university as a student, which was frustrating, but at least you didn’t need anyone’s permission to leave. Since you weren’t a novice anymore, nobody batted an eyelid at you heading outside the afternoon of your scheduled interview.
You were near the main door when, out of nowhere, Sister Daeun stopped you to talk.
“My nephew’s told me everything. I can’t say I approve of your relationship, but it does make me feel better that there was love involved. A lot, apparently,” your gaze averted to the ground, “which makes your decision to break up with him out of respect for your parents all the more admirable. It was wrong of Jungkook to make it public, he knows that, and he would like to apologise and give you the money he made this summer.”
“I couldn’t take it, sister,” you opposed. “It’s his. He needs it to pay rent, he’s moving in with Hoseok and Taehyung.”
Wait, was that why he hadn’t left yet? Because he wanted to wait until September so he didn’t have to pay for August?
“He’ll make much more when he’s on tour,” Sister Daeun insisted. “This is the least he can do for you. That I can do for you, too. You’ll always be my novice, Y/N, no matter what.” Without a second’s thought, you hugged her tightly. It was solacing to know there was at least one person who saw past your sins. “Jungkook’s gone to get the money but he won’t be here until late, Bangtan is opening for another one of those rock bands in a concert tonight. He’ll give it to you tomorrow.”
“I was just going into town, so if you tell me the name of the venue, I’ll stop by. He must be there doing a stage rehearsal.” You remembered the light in his eyes when he’d explained to you everything about the vocation he was so passionate about, how sweet his smile was… No. No. You shouldn’t feel anything after what he’d done. “I want to get this over and done with as soon as possible.”
That turned out to be yet another bad decision.
Once your interview was over, you rushed to the same venue you’d seen Jungkook perform Rock God and Church.
Paying no mind to the fans at the entrance who looked askance at you for jumping the line, the security guy let you in when he recognised you. Memories of the two nights you’d previously been there stormed you while getting backstage, especially how fast your heart had beat because of the racy lyrics of the songs and the way Jungkook had looked at you from the stage.
Now, it died inside your chest as you watched him make out with Amber at the end of the otherwise empty hallway.
He had her pinned against the wall, hands gripping her ass to press their bodies together and lips devouring hers as though he couldn’t get enough. Amber’s hands were wrapped around his neck, and she now grabbed a fistful of his hair to pull his head back and start kissing his neck. You saw how Jungkook smirked at the action, turned on by her dominance.
Both in their rockstar outfits, they looked like a perfect match, so you couldn’t help but wonder if they’d been dating all along. If that boyfriend of hers Jungkook had told you about was none other than himself.
Forcing yourself out of your shock, you exited the venue through the back as quickly as you could, saving the cascade of tears that was already building up in your eyes until you were alone.
It wasn’t that you were going to forgive him and expected his apology to come with an offer to date him again, but even after everything he had done to you, you still loved him. You hated yourself for it, but you couldn't help it. You were so stupid that you wished he'd find you there, sat on the cold concrete, and just held you in his arms until you stopped crying.
The next day you slept through breakfast, and would’ve stayed in your cell until lunch had Father Jimin not summoned you to his office again.
Curiously, this time around he looked… sorry?
“I’ve been made aware of some information this morning,” he said from across his desk with a nod.
“About me?” You shifted uncomfortably in your seat. Oh, God, what now?
“I can’t answer that because it has to do with a confession, but it’s made me realise I was wrong.” He leaned in, gaze moving around as he tried to think of a way not to reveal anything disclosed in the confessional box. “I should’ve been more cautious instead of welcoming just anyone into our home. Sometimes, I fail to see beyond the surface, and it results in the harm of others. A harm I pray it’s possible to heal from.”
“I don’t understand…”
“What I mean is that you don’t have to be afraid anymore. You can go back to being a novice, or take as long as you need to resolve any doubts you might have. Whatever you choose, I’ll support you.”
“But, why, Father? The things I did– You forgive me?”
“I’ve seen you regret them even if they weren’t your fault, so yes, I do.” You frowned. “I just hope you can forgive me too.”
On your way back to your cell, you walked slowly, using all your energy to figure out what Father Jimin had been talking about. When the answer popped up in your mind, you turned around and ran through the abbey. If Jungkook had done what you thought he had… Fortunately, it didn’t take long to find him, as you almost crashed together when turning to the next hallway. Had it not been because he’d grabbed your waist in time, you would’ve fallen.
When he realised it was you, he let go and stepped back. “Y/N, I wanted to talk to y–”
“Did you tell Father Jimin you raped me?”
The question took him by surprise. “He talked to you first… Wait, I thought confessional secrecy was unbreakable?”
“He didn’t tell me, I deduced it on my own.” You crossed your arms, disappointed you were right. “Why would you do that? I can’t make sense of it.”
“It was the only way to get the abbot to take you back. It’s not like he can report me to the police, and I’m leaving anyway… I told him I made you do things and that you were scared to tell anyone.” Jungkook looked everywhere but your eyes. “I’m really sorry for outing you. It was fucking childish of me and you didn’t deserve it. I was just so mad at what you said… but I know that’s no excuse.”
A part of you wanted to apologise for that and even ask him if it was too late to start over, but another reminded you of what you saw last night and stopped you, along with the one that should hold the most weight—your parents. It was a miracle you’d been given back the chance to honour their wishes, so you couldn’t ruin it again.
“I also wanted to give you this.” Jungkook handed you an old school bag. “My aunt told you what’s inside, right? She mentioned earlier you were going to come pick it up yesterday at the venue.”
“Yes, I forgot…” you lied. “I was at a job interview and got out quite late.”
“That’s okay. Did it go well?” He shouldn’t have asked, it was none of his business anymore. The interest in you had just rolled out of his mouth before he could stop it.
“It did, actually.” Both of you knew that if you went back to being a novice, you couldn’t take the job, but neither addressed it.
“Swell.” Jungkook put his hands inside his pockets, looked at you like he wanted to say much more. “I hope you have a happy life, Y/N. I really do.”
“Wait, are you saying goodbye? You’re leaving now?”
So soon?
“Yeah, poor Father Jimin thinks I’m… Well, you know. I wouldn’t want someone like me around you girls either. Plus, it’s September today, summer’s over,” he said with a forced smile. “Hoseok and Tae are waiting for me in the van. I shouldn’t keep them waiting.”
Before he could leave, you walked closer and gave him a hug. It didn’t feel right even when he wrapped his arms tight around you and buried his face in the crook of your neck, what with everything left unsaid, but you needed to feel his warmth one last time.
“Goodbye, Jungkook. And happy birthday.”
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Two years later
“You’ll like Bangtan, they’re wicked hot,” Chloe said for the third time, rather trying to convince herself than you, as she knew rock wasn’t your type of music. “Especially Taehyung, he’s my favourite!”
The concert was supposed to start soon, so hugging yourself and rubbing your arms, you stood on your tiptoes to check if the long queue ahead was moving any faster. “Well, I’m glad they’re hot, ‘cause I’m freezing.”
She, Chloe, was a friend you’d made on the first day of university. Lots had changed.
“It won’t be long now, get the tickets ready,” she gave you something to do, to forget about the February cold.
As she’d promised, it took less than five minutes for the two of you to enter the biggest venue in town. Such was the fame of Bangtan now. You were only glad the security guy from the other times wasn’t there to recognise you, since Chloe was unaware of your past as a groupie. It wasn’t that you were keeping it from her… You just didn’t feel like talking about him.
“Come on,” she grinned while grabbing your hand, all excited, “let’s get close to the stage!”
The concert lasted what felt like an eternity.
Not only did you have to endure Rock God and Church again, which opened the wound of a relationship you still hadn’t healed from, but you also had to keep your head down so as to not be spotted by the band members.
It was going alright, though, until you made the mistake of glancing up, and saw him. And he saw you.
Minus the fact that he wasn’t a blond anymore, Jungkook looked the same as always. Not that that was a bad thing. Whether in his rockstar outfit or covered in goat milk, he took your breath away. He skipped a few notes due to the shock of seeing you in the crowd but as the professional he was, he managed to make his faltering almost unnoticeable and keep playing the guitar like nothing had happened. But he wouldn’t lose you out of sight.
You wanted to look away, leave, even, but found you couldn’t, like Jungkook had put a spell on you. A spell that only broke once Bangtan thanked their fans for coming and left the stage.
Chloe, who’d been cheering throughout the whole show, now went on about how amazing it had been, how hot Taehyung had looked. Not really listening, you automatically nodded to everything until you heard, “Let’s go to the toilets before a line forms, I really need to pee.”
“Sure.”
You held her purse while you waited outside, recalling how Father Jimin had warned you seeing Jungkook again would only make your wound sting—to which you’d agreed! The only reason you were there was because you’d promised Chloe. Chloe, who was taking so long.
With a sigh, your eyes neglected that random spot on the floor they’d been fixed on and flew around to end up on those of Jungkook, who was walking towards you. The few people in the line to use the toilets gasped and watched their idol, but he didn’t care, walked past them like they didn’t exist. You, weren’t sure what to feel when he was finally in front of you.
“Hi,” he said with a faint smile that you returned rather awkwardly, given the fact everyone was looking at you. “Can we talk… in private?”
Every cell of your body told you to decline, that Jungkook was a book you shouldn’t pick up again even to leaf through, but your head nodded on its own accord. Hope you don’t mind, Chloe.
It was upstairs to the now deserted first floor he led you, and the balcony of which you stood next by, where you could see the few people left heading out. They didn’t hold your attention for longer than a second, though.
“I didn’t think you’d come,” Jungkook spoke almost shyly, yet his eyes didn’t leave your face until he forced them to, not to weird you out. How long had he been staring like that? But you looked so pretty...
“I’m here with a friend from uni, she’s a fan.”
He didn’t understand. “Wait, you ended up leaving the convent?”
“I did finish my novitiate but I never took the vows. They let me live there, though.”
It wasn’t a decision you made overnight, obviously, and one Father Jimin and Sister Daeun worked hard for many months to make you see it wouldn’t have upset your parents as much as you believed, much less get them to stop loving you. In fact, you were still coming to terms with it, not entirely free of guilt, but a mix of secular and spiritual life was proving to be exactly what you needed.
The university and the abbey, parties and Mass, your new friends and your family… You could have both and save your soul from damnation. Now, could you save your heart from breaking all over again? It felt like it already was, physically so close to Jungkook yet so far that an uncomfortable silence had fallen between you.
“Are you seeing anyone?”
You looked at him. Cut to the chase, alright… “I’m not. A-Are you?”
Was that a sigh of relief he let out through his parted lips, or did you just want it to be? “No.”
“I thought you’d be dating Amber.” Jungkook frowned slightly, so you went on and confessed, “I saw you together the night before you left. I came to pick up the money and… Well, none of that matters now.”
Horror painted Jungkook’s face. That was how you’d remembered him? Getting off with Amber?
“She’d just broken up with her boyfriend,” he wasted no time in saying. “Neither of us was thinking clearly. It was a one-time thing, an adrenaline rush after a concert.”
You hugged yourself, lips pressing together at the details you didn’t want to hear. “You don’t need to explain, we weren’t dating anymore…”
“Fuck, I’m sorry that you’ve thought all this time that I was with her,” Jungkook apologised anyway, gaze falling to the floor in shame. “Actually, I know that it doesn’t count for anything, but I’m sorry about a lot of things.”
“Yeah, I wish it did. Count… Or better yet, I wish I’d gone with you,” you laughed, at the fact that you meant it.
“What?” Jungkook took a step closer, as though he’d misheard and wanted to make sure he got it this time. Suddenly, you realised what an idiot you were being.
“Nothing, forget it.” You turned around to leave before the lump in your throat summoned any tears, but Jungkook took your hand to stop you. He couldn’t let you go, even if he’d been the one to leave last time.
“I’m glad you didn’t come with me, Y/N, and that you got to do what you wanted. But I do wish I hadn’t ruined everything and hurt you. If I could go back, I'd punch me in the face.”
It didn’t mean you’d forgotten, but the truth was that you’d forgiven what he did a while ago. After all, “I was also a dick to you.”
“If you’re a dick, then I like dick.”
Actually, you hated him.
You hated even more that that made you laugh but it was because of Jungkook’s clownery that you first fell for him. And you’d never stopped loving him. He smiled fondly, caressing your hand. Neither had he, it seemed.
“Does this mean you want us to…?”
His eyes opened wide, feigning scandal. “What, here? I’d sooner do it in a chapel.” You rolled your eyes, but couldn’t keep from smiling. “How about we start with a date? Say... Friday at 5pm? I know a good roller-skating rink.”
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jinkookspencil · a month ago
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take off your glasses | jjk
your eyeglasses gave you sight and comfort, but jungkook looked too sexy wearing his....
description/tw/tags: ~2.1k words / jungkook just finished recording his birthday message for jimin.... and he looked too good in glasses / SMUT (minors DNI) / established relationship / y/n is a little insecure
author's note: inspired by two things: jungkook's birthday message to jimin which was so unnecessarily sexy, AND namjoon jokingly told jk "take off your glasses" in an episode of run and something switched inside me at those words... >.< this is so smutty that idk if i feel comfortable enough sharing to the point where i'm actually considering just doing a jk style complete delete of it with time.... we'll see. as always, any feedback is welcome! <3
“Ah, Jiminie will laugh at that,” Jungkook boasts as he put away his phone. “I guess I have to start recording video messages for all my hyungs now.”
“That’s nice of you,” you utter, sat across from him at the desk, head buried in the book you were reading.
“Baby…” It’s Jungkook’s voice only louder and the air around you had shifted, you realize. Looking up from your book, you found Jungkook standing right behind you.
You had been so immersed in your book you never took in Jungkook’s presence that night - and judging by the way he called you and started rubbing your shoulders, he seemed to be getting needy... But as you look up at him, you realize you also never took in how he looked tonight, the weight of it all hitting you all at once. Towering over you, Jungkook’s long hair - which you had always adored - was ruffled as though he played with it, sleeves rolled up to reveal the tattoos on his arm while his chest peeked through a couple of undone buttons, and the thing that got you the most…. he was wearing his glasses…
It shocked you when you found out earlier on in your relationship that Jungkook had poor vision too, since he seemed so perfect. But it also helped you feel more at ease for some weird, unknown reason - like you were glad bad eyesight was yet another thing he understood you on, added to the endless list of shared problems, mindsets, beliefs, and interests that always made your relationship feel safe. Yet, unlike you, he always preferred contacts and only wore glasses rarely around the house. The sight of it - and him - took you by surprise.
“Hey,” you say, taking in the sight of him, your shoulders hunched together.
“Hey,” he laughs at your sudden reaction, as if you hadn’t been in the same room for over an hour after he came home from working late at the studio. “Good book, huh?”
“Glasses,” you point out, tilting your head and ignoring his question. “I like it. You should wear them more often.”
“Thanks, but….eh,” he shrugs. “You know I prefer contacts, but I think I need to give my eyes a break from them...”
“Still, you look…really…good. At least wear them more often around the house, for me?”, you stare up at him through your lashes and flash him a smile, rubbing his arm, unaware of the entire effect that’d have on him.
Jungkook rolls his eyes and pokes the inside of his cheek with his tongue. “Sure, baby,” he says, kissing the top of your head. “But this is a two-way deal, you have to try contacts for me too.”
All you can do is sigh. While Jungkook preferred contacts, you preferred glasses - and for many reasons, as you have made clear to him all the other times he asked you to take them off. Firstly, you were clumsy and the idea of poking at your eyeball regularly felt like a disaster waiting to happen, not to mention it freaked you out, especially the horror stories of people forgetting to take out their contacts. Secondly, someone mentioned once that there were different types and it just seemed like a hassle. And, the biggest reason: glasses helped hide your face. You just never liked the way your face looked. Plus, it didn’t help that your ex once shrieked when you took off your glasses in front of him and told you to keep them on… 
Jungkook’s entirely different. He knew you could be insecure, but instead of feeding your insecurities he never passed an opportunity to tell you that you were beautiful and hype you up, whether you were wearing your glasses or not.... the not being while you got ready every day or during sex and really intense make-out sessions when they just kept getting away.
“Jungkook, you know I -“
“I know, but baby, you’re so beautiful,” he resigns. “I wish you knew that. If only you could see yourself the way I see you. Do you at least see the face I make when you take them off while we kiss?!”
“.....I thought it was just because we're in the heat of the moment.”
“Baby…”, he shakes his head, taking yours in his hands. “It’s like that scene in Business Proposal - it’s funny that I get why girls love that scene more than you do. It’s sexy. YOU are sexy.”
You raise your eyebrows at him, looking down in denial and at your outfit, wondering if you wore anything different that drove Jungkook crazy, but it was just one of his t-shirts and your short shorts that he liked.... but it was nothing special.
“Look at me,” he says, a commanding tone in his voice that you couldn’t ignore. “Take off your glasses.”
“If I take off my glasses I can’t look at you, Jungkook,” you say with a sarcastic tone, but Jungkook doesn’t take any of it, bending down until he was a breath away from your face.
“You can now.”
Your hand reaches up to the frames that sat on your face, and the second you take them off Jungkook’s lips meets yours in a kiss.
“Fuck…,” he sighs into your mouth before meeting it again. His arms wrap around you in an embrace, pulling you up and between his legs as he leaned on the desk. His hands squeeze your butt before toying with the hem of the t-shirt you were wearing, taking it off of you the moment you lifted your hands from his shoulders in permission. You wrap your arms over Jungkook’s toned shoulders and around his neck as he felt your back and kissed you - on your lips, your neck, and all over your face. Just as you had gotten lost in his kisses, anticipating where he’d kiss next, his large arms swerve you around until you leaned against the desk and faced him standing between your legs instead. 
A smirk appeared on his face at the sound you let out, and in a flash, Jungkook absentmindedly takes off his glasses and pulls you in for a deeper kiss… Yet you’re too stunned to kiss him back well, grab onto him, or even feel him up.
“…Fuck, okay,” you whisper against his lips. “I get it now - that was… so fucking hot, Jungkook.” 
“Wh- oh.... I didn’t even realize I did that," you feel him smile against your lips, unknowing if he was sincere or if he planned the entire kiss to get you to understand him.
The image of Jungkook replayed itself in your mind, and with the feeling of his lips and bunny teeth brushing against your lips…. you were about to go insane. You wrap your arms around his neck once again, your hands running through his long hair as you pull him into a kiss and he toys with the hooks of your bra.
When they snap open, he wastes no time reaching for the bra between your bodies and chucking it across the room, unbuttoning and stripping off his own shirt before bending down to kiss your chest. You stare down at him, and when his gaze meets yours, you feel your entire body come alive. 
He looked unbelievable and already showed you so much love… You wanted - no, needed, to do the same to him. Reach for Jungkook’s length, you stroke it through his boxers, and, reaching inside them, he grunts as you feel him hard in your hands, only for him to shove your wrist away at the elastic of his underwear.
“Jungkook… let me feel you,” you moan against his face, his forehead brushing against yours as he shakes his head. 
“Lean back,” he commands, and all you can do is obey, already moving backward to lay on the desk the moment his hands find your shoulders. Jungkook hooked his fingers to your underwear, and after raising your hips for him to swiftly pull them off of you, you lift your legs to wrap them around his body…. but he separates them.
“No….,” he says “You won’t be able to see me, but I’ll make sure you feel me.”
His face disappears from view, leaving you nothing but a blurry sight of the ceiling as Jungkook wraps his arms around your thighs. “Fuck, baby.” 
The feeling of Jungkook’s tongue clouds every other sensation a human being is capable of, you were unable to register or control even the incredibly loud noises you were both making. He got hungrier as you ruffled his long hair, and when you begin feeling Jungkook’s nose rubbing against your heat, you were unable to hold yourself any longer, letting go of him and yourself. Jungkook continued to lick and taste you, before standing up and leaning over you, removing your hand from your face.
“I missed this face. Did you feel me?,” he whispers against your neck. 
“Fuck, did I feel you….,” you reply, catching your breath as Jungkook continued kissing all over your chest as it rose and fell. “But I missed your face too….”
Jungkook snapped at those six words and met you in a kiss, his face remaining millimeters away from yours, even long after he says, “I’m right here, baby,” while you catch your breath.
You try to avert his gaze as he stares into your eyes, but he never lets you, a hand caressing your cheek while the other roamed your body, grazing and scratching at your arms, shoulders, and torso, pinning your arms against the mattress when you tried hiding your face.
“Look at me, baby…..”
When his fingertips took over and his touches got lighter, you were reminded that Jungkook hadn’t had enough… and you didn’t either.
“Ready?”, he hummed against your lips before you nod.
Jungkook kissed you on the cheek before he got up and on top of you, his gaze never breaking even as he aligned himself with your entrance. You only caught glimpses of Jungkook’s focused, aroused face, his necklace dangling over you and blocking your sight, at which your hand leaves his shoulder and grabs his neck, holding both Jungkook and his necklace in place.
“Ffuck,” he moans.
The sight of him in a flustered rush did the same to you, and Jungkook closed his eyes as he picked up his pace, bending down to kiss your body. Topped with Jungkook’s murmurs of “Beautiful”, “My beautiful girl”, “Baby”, and countless other curses and moans, the sensations were overwhelming, and all you could do was cover your face with your arm as you neared your high, but a firm grip attaches itself to your wrist and pins your arm above your head.
“No, baby,” Jungkook heaves. “I - want to see you.”
Almost in obedience, your body responds with just what he wants as you come undone, doing the same at the sight of you. Jungkook catches his breath and returns to normal before you do, kissing your chest as it slowed its movements while you caught up to him.
“My beautiful, baby,” he murmurs against your tummy, moaning when you run your fingers through his hair before he stood up and pulled you up. He brushes away any hair from your face and tucks loose strands behind your ear, his fingers finally resting on your temple and your chin. “This is my favorite face.”
Jungkook nears, tilting your head downwards and kissing your forehead, just above your eyebrows, before kissing your eyelids, nose, and lips one final time.
“I'll get you cleaned up, baby, then let’s move to the bed and stare at each other all night,” he smiles, holding your face in his hands.
You can’t help but giggle. “Sounds like a plan. Can you do it all night though? We both know you pass out so easily.”
“Yeah…. I always sleep after you, you know?”
“What?!”
“I don’t sleep that early! I watch you sleep a little,” he strokes your shoulder. “Then, when I feel you asleep and relaxed against me… when I see your face, so bare and peaceful, so close to me…. It relaxes me and I go to sleep.”
“You watch me like that scene in Twilight?!”
“I do,” he laughs. “Can you blame me? I’m fucking in love with you, beautiful.”
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deepdarkdelights · 3 months ago
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The Reaper | Jungkook x Reader
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Pairing: Yandere Mercenary Jungkook x  Reader 
Word Count: 14.6k
Warnings: 18+, Yandere, Obsession, Fear, Non-Consensual Touching, Symptoms of Panic/Anxiety, Stalking, Murder, Lots of Blood, Attempted Sexual Assault (Not By Jungkook), Mild Smut, Dub-Con, Cunnilingus, Decapitation, Throats are Slit, Wolf Attacks 
I do not condone the acts displayed in this story nor do I believe any members of BTS would actually engage in this type of behavior. This is simply written for entertainment purposes and should not be taken as a reflection of my own values, opinions, or morals. 
Preview: “With your skirts drawn up over your thighs, the skin raised with goosebumps from the cool spring air, his hand retreated only to return with what looked like a stamp but where the rubber should have been, there were instead tiny needles all coated with bright red ink. Before you could begin to squirm again he quickly pressed it against the side of your thigh pulling a pained cry from your throat.
When he removed the faux stamp beads of blood rose to the surface of your skin, blending with the red ink that has been left behind. But the image imprinted on your skin was clear as day, a symbol your town had come to associate with fear: a skull pierced by a sword and ensnared by a snake. It was the mark of the reaper. 
You had been marked for death.” 
A/N: Here I am at almost three in the morning again lol. This is super UNEDITED but I will edit it tomorrow so please bear with me when it comes to any grammatical errors. I HUSTLED to get this done before classes start Monday so hopefully the quality did not suffer. This also ended up being 4-6k longer than intended. Very on brand. Anyways, I hope you enjoy and I can’t wait to see you in my inbox and the comments, love you 💜💜💜
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It was supposed to be the happiest day of your life, but your stomach was twisted in knots. 
You were one of the lucky ones, at least that was what your father had told you when he excitedly grabbed hold of your hands with a winning smile. 
“A diamond in the rough,” He had whispered in awe, “How lucky I am to have had such a beautiful daughter born out of this village.” 
It is true that none of us have a say as to what family we are born into, and that couldn’t be any more true for you. You were born into a poor family in a dilapidated village in the woods, you had been destined to live a destitute life like everyone else who had come before you. But you were happy. You enjoyed your spring days running barefoot through the Brooke, the lingering heat of summer nights beneath the stars, the crunch of autumn leaves underfoot, and the bite of cold winter wind against your cheeks. You adored the simplicity of the only life you had ever known and you never wanted for more. 
But oftentimes, parents desired more for their children, more than they ever had. And that was why your father had jumped at the chance to marry you off to a visiting lord. 
Had you not entered the forest that day to forage, maybe you would not have ended up in this situation. But you had so there was no point in dwelling on the alternate possibilities of what could have come to pass rather than what actually had. 
~~~~~~~
You had always been warned about the danger of the woods growing up, but those warnings had been about wolves, bears, and mountain lions. There had been one dangerous animal you had ignored, one you walked amongst every day: men. 
You had been sitting down in the soft grass, your legs folded beneath you at the knee as you carefully plucked berries from the bush, your cupped palms pouring them into the basket beside you when he had approached. At first, you considered that you had been so focused you had not heard him follow you, but you soon came to understand that he had been perfectly silent - his body so trained to move in stealth that even the woods would not give him away. 
A firm arm wrapping around your waist and the cool glide of metal against your throat startled a shriek from you as your body flinched back only causing you to corral yourself into his arms, your back pressed against his solid chest as the knife posed at your neck barred you from moving. 
You panted in fright, your eyes clenching shut as you felt his lips brush over the shell of your ear while he hushed you and cooed like you were a little injured animal. 
“Stay still, little lamb, I don’t want to hurt you.” He muttered, his voice low and rhythmic as he spoke a language you had no way of understanding. 
“I don’t understand,” You said after an uncomfortable swallow, your neck tense beneath the blade of the knife. 
“There are many things you can’t understand, not yet, the hunt hasn’t begun.” He said with an amused chuckle. 
The humor was lost on you, his words nothing more than a jumbled mess of sounds strung together that you were unable to decipher. His actions though, were readable. You jerked in surprise as his knifeless hand slid down your body, tugging your layers of skirts up over your knees and not stopping there. 
“Stop! Leave me alone!” You cried, your legs kicking frantically as you grabbed his forearm and tried to still it. 
You were quick to learn that he was incredibly strong as your grasp did nothing to dissuade him. Another laugh vibrated through his chest and against your back, he was clearly amused by your thrashing which only served to send chills down your spine. He pressed the blade harder against your skin, the metal just barely piercing the soft, vulnerable flesh causing your body to go rigid in fear that he would slit your throat. 
“Good girl,” He hummed, the tip of his nose grazing over your cheekbone in what felt like an almost affectionate gesture. “Be still,”
With your skirts drawn up over your thighs, the skin raised with goosebumps from the cool spring air, his hand retreated only to return with what looked like a stamp but where the rubber should have been, there were instead tiny needles all coated with bright red ink. Before you could begin to squirm again he quickly pressed it against the side of your thigh pulling a pained cry from your throat. 
When he removed the faux stamp beads of blood rose to the surface of your skin, blending with the red ink that has been left behind. But the image imprinted on your skin was clear as day, a symbol your town had come to associate with fear: a skull pierced by a sword and ensnared by a snake. It was the mark of the reaper. 
You had been marked for death. 
A pained cry of devastation filled the forest, a sound that had unwillingly left you that was not unlike the call of a wounded animal. Out of everyone in your village, why had you been chosen to die? Who would have paid the hefty price to target a quiet village girl? 
You knew what came next, you were going to be hunted down. That was what they did - they marred the flesh of their victim so that they could find them if by some miracle they had found a way to run away. And that meant the runner would have an entire band of reapers on their tail, chasing them until they grew too tired to continue running and were unwillingly dispatched - their soul severed from the body in one fell swoop of a blade. 
You weren’t going to survive this, no one ever did. And why would you be the exception? 
The reaper behind you hummed in what he attempted to make a soothing manner as he lowered his knife from your throat, the hand that once held the horrific stamp was now freely caressing your arm in short smooth strokes. 
“Did it hurt that badly, little lamb?” He whispered in what you now knew to be the coded language of the reapers. 
There was no way you would ever be able to understand what he was saying and he knew that so why did he bother speaking to you in his language at all? Why didn’t he speak the villages’ language? At least then you could understand what he was planning to do to you, and your wild imagination was only frightening you more than what he had done so far. 
His fingers brushed your tears away, they were long, nimble, and calloused, the perfect tools to wield an arsenal of weaponry but were instead attempting to soothe you. You were utterly confused. 
“Don’t cry, this is a happy day, you’ll see that soon I promise you.” He spoke softly, his hands gently cupping your face and allowing you to face him as his thumbs continued to swipe the tears away. 
Your vision was blurry making it difficult to identify him, your body still shaking with frightened hiccups. You could make out the honey hue of his smooth skin and the dark strokes of coal around his eyes as well as the black leather and linen that covered his body. You could tell that he was young and most definitely strong, his linens straining against the cords of muscle that built his shoulders. Even with your limited vision, you were able to tell that he was perfectly sculpted to be a reaper, a hired killer to whoever offered the highest price. 
His fingers lightly traced down the length of your jaw before freezing, his entire body stiffening like he had heard something you were not able to hear. And you were exactly right, he had heard the incoming party of hunters. 
You heard him unsheathe his sword before you had seen it, the sound of metal slicing through the air as he wrapped a strong arm around your shoulders, tugging you into his side. 
It took a moment before you heard it, but the sound of hooves was unmistakable. And, a few short seconds later, the first horse broke through the trees before being followed by a band of its fellows. Seated astride the first horse was a man that was near your father’s age, his clothing refined and expensive along with the gold and jeweled rings that covered his fingers. And the sigil he bore on his horse was enough to confirm your suspicions - he was the lord of the land. 
Your body sagged in relief and, as a result, relaxed against the strong chest of your captor whose grip only tightened further. You were going to be saved. 
“Release the girl, or suffer the consequences.” The Lord spoke, his voice still and commanding. 
The man behind you was motionless, his breathing steady and calm despite the massive hunting party that was armed to the teeth staring him down. 
“I won’t tell you again,” The lord called, and with that, his men raised their bows and notched their arrows - all waiting for the command to fire. 
The reaper leaned forward, his warm breath beside your ear as he whispered the only words he has been permitted to say, “When the time comes, I will find you.”
And with that, he threw a small pouch with lightning speed, the fabric unraveling as it met the ground and releasing a massive and unrelenting stream of dark plumes of smoke blinding everyone in its vicinity - giving him the perfect cover to slip away. 
Your eyes teared up as the smoke cleared, whatever powder had ignited had greatly irritated your eyes and filled your lungs with smoke causing the hunting party and yourself to violently cough away the burning sensation in your throats and chests. 
You dug the heels of your palms into your eyes as you recovered from the unexpected attack. You were shocked that you were alive more than anything else. It had been a twist of fate and a shot of luck that a highborn had traveled this far into the land and because of that, you were alive. But for how much longer, you were unaware. The mark on your thigh still stung, demanding its presence be known. With that mark, you were as good as dead. No, you were a walking corpse - it was only a matter of time before the reapers came for you. 
The sudden appearance of a hand before your face startled you back to reality causing you to fall back onto your rear in an embarrassing display of clumsiness. 
It was him, Lord Ilseong. 
“Are you unharmed?” He asked, concern heavy in his eyes. 
You gratefully took his hand and allowed him to help you to your feet before bowing your head to him and bending at the knee in a show of respect, your eyes trained to the ground. 
“Thank you,” Your voice wavered, heavy with emotion, “You saved my life, I don’t know how I can ever repay you.” 
Lord Ilseong hummed in appreciation at the sight of your submission, “How unusual, someone of your status who understands etiquette.” 
Your blood warmed in irritation from his remark, despite the heroic actions he was like every other highborn of the land. They saw the people of your village as uncouth, dirty, and uneducated. You were surprised he hadn’t wiped his hand after helping you up. 
You flinched in surprise as your chin was held still once more today by his hand. The creases around his eyes deepened as he smiled, turning your head from side to side to appraise you. 
“Why you don’t look like the common peasantry at all,” He said with an amused grin and lecherous eyes, “In fact, you are quite the beauty.” 
“Thank you, my lord,” You forced the words out from a strained smile. You knew better than to disrespect a high born, lest your head would be swiftly removed and your family slaughtered from your careless wrath. 
One of the firmest lessons you had learned had been how to control your anger. Village people were expendable and you were not special. 
“Well trained,” He mused before releasing you from his hold, “I think I know just how you can repay me, my dear.” 
You were suddenly struck by the thought that you had escaped one dangerous trap only to wander into another. 
Lord Ilseong and his men had escorted you back home. The entire process was quite the spectacle, especially for the village people as you returned astride the horse of the lord of the land. He had helped you up and sat you directly in front of him, his one hand holding the reigns and the other settled on your waist. It had put you in an uncomfortable position, you couldn’t pull away from his wandering touch or you would tumble off of the horse. You had nearly collapsed in relief upon returning to your shack, your body slipping down the side of the horse and making for the front door in record time. 
Your stomach turned when he followed you inside. He had greeted your father enthusiastically who in turn fell to his knees in a deep bow. You rushed to his side and slid your arms beneath his, helping him rise back up to his feet. 
It was then that the horrible deal was made. 
“I have saved your daughter’s life and in turn, I expect to be repaid.” He said after he recounted the tale of your rescue to your father. 
“Repaid, my lord?” Your father asked, his voice wavering in fright, “I am afraid there isn’t much we lowly peasants could offer you.” 
“It is not money I require, nor land, nor tax,” 
“Then…what more could you request?”
“Your daughter’s hand, assuming she is untouched of course.”
Your heart dropped into your stomach as soon as his words met your ears. Lord Ilseong was not much younger than your father, in fact, you were certain that had your father not been subjected to decades of hard labor he would not look as aged as he did now, his stature would resemble that of his lords’. 
The sickness that brewed in your stomach was only made worse by the elation present on your father’s face. You could tell what he was thinking, being the father of the lady of the land would ensure the end of his days of work. He could find comfort and peace until the end of his days. 
“But of course,” Your father nodded excitedly, “Forgive my questioning, but what could you want with a peasant girl?”
“The previous lady was unable to birth me a son before her untimely passing. Your daughter is young and not nearly as uncouth as the rest of this village and her upbringing while unfit for that of a lady has no doubt made her strong. She will surely give me many children, and with training, we shall break her into the life of a lady.” 
You stood there, floored by the conversation that transpired before you. Your maidenhood and your liveliness were being haggled as if you had no say as if you weren’t even there. He spoke of breaking you like a mare and reducing you to nothing more than a child bearer. 
“She has certainly passed marrying age, I am doing you an immense favor by marrying her, really.” 
“An immense favor, indeed,” Your father mused, his hand cupping his chin as he pretended to be deep in thought despite already having made his decision, “Consider it done.” 
You felt as if you were on the verge of fainting. 
“Excellent, I shall send for my new bride in a week's time, until then I shall make preparations for the ceremony,” He said with a triumphant grin that told you that he was all too accustomed to getting what he wanted. “Until then, my dear.” 
In a matter of moments, your life had been irrevocably changed. And at that moment, you desperately hoped that the reaper would find you first and dispatch you before Lord Ilseong would ever have the chance of taking you. 
You shivered in disgust as the lord left a parting kiss on your hand before shutting the door after him. You frantically wiped your knuckles against your patched skirts before running to your room. You could hear your father calling after you, demanding you to stop but you did not listen. 
The yelling only continued when your mother returned home. You could hear your parents fighting the entire night, your father raising his voice over your mothers as he explained what this marriage could do for your family. Your mother understood your plight, she too was against the idea of your being wed to a man twice, almost thrice your age. 
But at the end of the day, your father’s decision reigned supreme. There was a hierarchy to all things, to society, to work, and of course to families. You were to be wed, regardless of your and your mother’s protests. 
Your fingers traced over the red-inked mark on your thigh, the imprint of the reaper still there with nowhere else to go. You relayed your thoughts as you traced the mark, a mantra barely parting your lips as you begged for the reaper to find you first.
Your index finger traced the lower curve of the circle that surrounded the symbol, and just there you could feel the raised bumps of a word, of a name. 
Jungkook. 
~~~~~~~
That was what had landed you where you were now, seated in a carriage sent by Lord Ilseong and dressed in pristine, elaborate robes. 
It was your wedding day, it was supposed to be the happiest day of your life but you could not help but entertain the thought of throwing yourself from the carriage and allowing your body to be crushed beneath its wheels. While that seemed dramatic, you knew that the only way you could escape that old man was by death. He was a Lord, he took what he wanted and didn’t stop until he obtained it, and that included yourself. 
Your stomach churned with nausea, not only from the ceaseless swaying of the transportation but from the ever-present anxiety you had felt all week which had come to a climax on this very day. 
Perhaps, if you were lucky, he would take many mistresses and would be satisfied with them after you birthed him a son and he would leave you alone for the rest of your days. And maybe if you were even luckier he would die within ten years' time - stricken by disease or the halt of his heart. But you could only dream, dreaming would get you through this inevitable endless nightmare. 
The reaper had not come to save your soul. 
That was what you had reasoned, your untimely death would save your soul from being tainted by his lordship. You would much rather die young than be bound to that man for the remainder of his days. You would much rather be impaled by the cool steel of a blade than ever allow him to touch you again. 
You allowed your body to go limp against the side of the carriage, the cool spring breeze soothing over your face like a gentle caress. You were in the thick of the woods now, the winding branches of the trees casting twisted shadows over everything below them. They looked like snares just waiting for the right prey to wander into them. 
After that thought entered your mind, everything changed. In the blink of an eye, an array of arrows were let loose, flying into the wheels of the carriage and sending it careening off to its side. 
You shrieked in surprise and fright as the carriage was easily tipped over, your body following immediately causing you to slam down all of your weight against your right shoulder and the other carriage door which now lay against the ground. 
You cried out in pain as your body thrummed in shock from the fall, your head ringing from the collision against the door. You could feel a stickiness in your hair causing you to raise your hand to touch your scalp, and when your fingers retreated they were coated with thick, red, blood. 
A gurgled scream had you snapping back to awareness. That had to have been the driver, you could just faintly make out his form, from the small slatted windows toward the front of the carriage, which was steadily slumping forward as all life was rapidly draining from him. 
“What?” You gasped as you struggled to sit up, all of your weight resting on your bent forearms as your vision blurred. You had hit your head well. 
The carriage shook with a loud thump, your throat tightening in fright as you heard several more steady thumps follow. Someone had landed on top of it, they were coming for you. 
You hissed as you were blinded by a sudden burst of light, the other carriage door that was now above you had been wrenched open. As you blinked away the stinging sensation in your eyes you realized that you were no longer alone. 
There was a man standing above you, straddling the entrance to the door. He was clothed from head to toe in black cloth and leather, his left arm bare and exposed, and a mask covering his mouth and nose. All that you could make of his face was the glinting metal pierced through his eyebrow, both of which were furrowed in what was concern but came across as intimidating. 
“Stay away from me!” You yelled, your head throbbing in response to your shouts. 
The man shook his head silently before settling into a squat and gripping the door of the carriage in one hand before leaning inside and grabbing the sleeve of your robes. Now that he was nearer you were able to make out the stitched symbol on his shoulder that you hadn’t been able to see before - a red skull, sword, and snake. 
He was a reaper. 
You didn’t know whether to struggle or flee due to the fact that your whispered wishes in the night had suddenly come true. The reaper had come for you first, Lord Ilseong would not have you. Due to your plight your body had frozen, your mind overloaded by your sudden realization. 
The reaper - Jungkook, took the opportunity to swiftly pull you out of the carriage and gently set you down on the soft grass. You stared at him dumbly as he dropped into a squat in front of you, his hands taking hold of your face and maneuvering it so he could assess your head wound. He tisked to himself in displeasure, his fingers lightly prodding the area around the wound forcing a wince and a groan out of you. 
“Poor little lamb,” He hummed, his fingers retreating only to lightly trace down the curve of your jaw.
“Please, if you’re going to kill me do it quickly, and don’t make me suffer. Let me die with dignity.” You said, boldly grabbing his hand and pulling it away from your face.
You had heard tales in your village, tales of what some of the reapers had done to some poor unfortunate girls - stealing their innocence and leaving them behind to deal with the burdens that have been relinquished to them whether they had been marked or not. The marked girls were luckier than most - their pain ended along with their life.
Jungkook cocked his head to the side in curiosity. He was not stupid, he knew what you were asking. But what truly puzzled him, was why you would think he would do something like that. If he had wanted to kill you he would have done it that very day he had met you. 
“Mea Lunatta,” He replied despite knowing you could not understand him, “My wife.” 
With that, he scooped you up into his strong arms and began to walk deeper into the trees. Your body went limp, you knew very well there was no way you could fight a born killer, it would be futile. Instead, you stared ahead, the light disappearing as he walked, his grip firm and strong. Although the woods were quiet you could not shake the chill that curled around your spine, you could feel that you were being watched. And you were not wrong, all it took was a little concentration and your eyes adjusting to the dim light before you saw it. 
There were eyes in the trees. 
~~~~~~~
Jungkook had finally come of age. At the age of twenty-five, he was finally permitted to partake in the hunt. 
The hunt was an annual occurrence, it happened like clockwork every spring. The reapers lived far from the villages, deep in the woods in their homes they had built all in a clustered community. And because of this reclusiveness, they often operated much like the predators of the woods. And that contributed to the start of the hunts. Every spring, like animals in rut, they hunted for partners - for wives. 
On the first of spring they dispersed, all the men that were twenty-five or older, and searched for their prospective partner. 
Jungkook had found you that first morning, on a cold spring day. He had heard you humming to yourself in the early hours of the morning. The small piles of melting snow glittered with the golden light of the steadily rising sun. You were hanging up white sheets on a clothesline, the fabric fluttering around you from the cool breeze. You looked absolutely breathtaking, like an angel shrouded in white with golden rays. 
From that moment on, he knew he had to have you. And as protocol instructed, he followed you around for the next several weeks. He grew attached. You radiated a warmth he had never felt before with your gentle smile and kind words. It was a warmth he wanted to steal for himself, a warmth that he could not bear the thought of sharing with anyone else. 
He found it endearing, how shy you were. But you were oh so tempting. He liked to think that you were inviting him into your room when you left your window unlatched, you were just too bashful to say anything. So he took the opportunity to sneak inside whenever you “allowed” him to. He wasn’t embarrassed to admit that he had rummaged through your things while you slept mere inches away. It had become a habit of his ever since he had trained to become a reaper, to learn all he could about a person. 
He learned that you were a bookworm from the hidden stories he found tucked behind your dresser, the pages creased and torn with love from the continuous thumbing through them. 
He learned you loved flowers from the blossoms he found pressed between those pages, bright blooms of daffodils, violets, and buttercups greeting him. 
He learned you often went hungry from the lack of food in your family's pantry. 
So began the second stage of the hunt, the courting. You seemed puzzled but unconcerned from the sudden discoveries of presents left on your window sill. By all means, you were delighted by the short stories, the bundles of wildflowers, and the occasional carefully wrapped veal and loaves of bread. Your excited smiles were enough to make his heart thump in his chest.
And so the courting continued until the week before the ceremony. That was where he was finally permitted to touch you, to mark you. 
The marking always occurred one week before the new moon, the date on which the official hunt would take place. The mark of the reaper meant different things depending on where it was placed on a person’s body, something which outsiders were typically unaware of. 
A mark on the wrist meant the mark of death.
A mark on the chest signified that you were a reaper. 
And a mark on the thigh was reserved only for potential spouses - for a wife in Jungkook’s case. 
Jungkook hadn’t anticipated that a lord would be in the area that day, nonetheless, Hell’s Hollow as the reapers referred to it. And he certainly could not have anticipated that said lord would come to your aid. Jungkook would have fled, taking you with him had he been permitted to do so. But there were rules he had to follow. 
The first rule was that he was not permitted to speak to outsiders. Although you were marked, you weren’t considered to be one of them and you were not allowed to have any knowledge of what was to come. 
The second rule was that after the marking, he was not permitted to see his potential spouse until the night of the hunt. 
The third rule was that the official hunt always took place on the new moon. The lack of moonlight gave the potential spouses an advantage - the darkness created a new challenge for the reaper that was seeking them. 
And the fourth rule was the most important of them all: if the runner made it outside of the reaper’s territory they would be given their freedom - no strings attached. 
That was a rule that made his heart clench uncomfortably. It was a rule engrained in tradition, if you were to best him, prove yourself capable, he would have to let you go. Despite what most of the villagers believed, reapers were bound by their honor and if they were to break those rules they would be dishonoring their brethren, and they would be exiled.
But the thought of that didn’t frighten him nearly as much as the thought of you successfully evading him. He knew he had an advantage, he had been tracking marks his entire life, he was confident that he would be able to capture you before you broke the boundaries of their territory. He couldn’t afford to doubt himself, doubt leads to mistakes and mistakes led to failure. 
He would not fail. 
You were surprisingly still in his hold as he trekked through the forest. He had expected you to put up more of a fight, to try and flee. But he had forgotten that you were indeed smart, you most likely knew you would not be able to escape him like this, especially now. Pride swelled within him at the thought of how clever you were, but at the same time worry quelled in his mind, your cleverness might take you away from him. 
He glanced down at you several times as he continued your journey, he would be lying if he were to say you were not distracting. You smelled fresh and clean with a lingering scent of oils that had been rubbed into your skin which was practically glowing, especially with the added intricacy of the garments you wore. They were familiar to him, the style, the embroidery, it was from someone he knew. Someone he wished he didn’t know. And that greatly confused him, but not as much as the sight of you inside that carriage that they had planned to attack. They had thought the lord himself would be inside, departing the village with collected taxes. But instead, you were there, his chosen. 
He could feel the eyes of his comrades in the trees, burning into his back. This was something he had been trying to avoid. 
Jungkook was strong and he was promising, it was well known knowledge that once the leader of their troupe stepped down he would be in the running for the position, a position that was highly sought after. And while Jungkook had many friends, brothers, amongst the reapers, he had just as many enemies. So what better way to scorn him than by stealing his chosen?
They all knew now, and he was certain that they would be hunting you alongside him tonight. 
That was a part of the hunt, after all, to challenge themselves. Reapers that were of age that did not bring a chosen partner would hunt from the pool if they wished to. And if they died in the process, the reaper that killed them would go unpunished. Jungkook was certain he would have to kill for you tonight, and that thought did not bother him. 
Your body suddenly tensed in his arms and in turn he stopped, immediately going on the defensive. He could feel you shrinking back into his chest in utter fear, harsh pants of breath parting your lips in pure fright. 
“Wolves.” You gasped, your hand involuntarily squeezing his bicep. 
A loud snap severed the silence of the forest and from the bushes emerged a wolf. It had the brightest blue eyes and pitch black fur, standing as tall as a horse. 
“Direwolf,” He said, a word that was the same in your language. 
You shrieked as he began to walk forward, your body wriggling for the first time since he had grabbed you. He hushed you, patting your back as he neared the wolf. The wolf did not appear to be aggressive, in fact, it seemed quite relaxed, even happy at the sight of Jungkook. Its massive tail swung slowly in excitement as it walked beside Jungkook, consciously slowing its pace so it did not overtake him. 
“My wolf,” He explained. He knew very well that you could not understand, but he could not remain silent, he wished to speak to you. 
The Direwolves had become their companions, they respected one another's borders and in turn, had formed a close relationship with select reapers. The Direwolves guarded their campgrounds, and in turn, the reapers ensured they would be fed in the barren days of winter. The Direwolves were the reason why no one ever tried to ambush them, they’re massive bodies, fanged teeth, and tough skin made them an impossible adversary. 
They were incredibly good at keeping people inside as well. 
His wolf made a good guide, leading the way into the campgrounds. The sun was nearly set, the forest growing impenetrably dark on these short spring days. It would not be long before the hunt started and he still needed to prepare you. 
The campgrounds were fairly empty, not many reapers or families milling about. They all knew what tonight marked and they were all preparing in their own ways. The wolf followed behind closely, coming to stop and sitting by his cabin, his bright blue eyes steady and alert. 
You began to struggle again as he crossed the threshold, the missing presence of the wolf instilling your instincts to fight once more. 
“Put me down!” You yelled through gritted teeth, your irritation from being carried around like a rag doll boiling to the surface. 
You could see his jaw clench beneath the cover of his mask, you were making him angry. 
He slammed the door shut behind him before setting you down, leaning against the only exit to make sure you wouldn’t try to leave before it was time. 
“I won’t let you touch me,” You said with a shake of your head, “And I won’t go down without a fight.”
You were impressed by the steadiness in your voice in spite of the deep-rooted fear you felt inside. You were not necessarily lying to him, you would make it as hard as possible for him despite knowing just how easily he could restrain you. You were terribly frightened. 
His body shook with laughter, his eyes crinkling in amusement which only served to unsettle you as well as frustrate you. He too knew that your threats were useless, in fact, he found them to be adorable. But, he did not have any plans that were like what you were insinuating. He would not be able to do that until after he caught you, fair and square. Not until you were his wife. 
He crossed his strong arms over his chest, leaning back in a relaxed manner against the door before nodding his head in the direction of the table where a white garment was folded on top. 
“Change.” He instructed. 
You looked between him and the table before shaking your head, “No.”
He cocked his head to the side, his pierced eyebrow raising in questioning at your defiance. He pulled down his mask and let it rest around his neck before he spoke again. 
“Change,” He smirked before sliding a knife out of his leg sheath, “Or I will do it for you.”
You didn’t have to speak his language in order to understand what he was insinuating. He would have no problems slashing your clothes into ribbons so you would have no other choice but to wear what he was giving you. 
You could feel your eyes burning with unshed tears that were threatening to pool over. Whenever you became overwhelmed with emotion you cried, especially when you were angry and you hated that so much. You sniffled pitifully and rubbed at the skin beneath your eyes, the playful smirk immediately dropping off of Jungkook’s face as he took a step in your direction. 
“Look away,” You snapped, stepping backward and grabbing the plain fabric from the table. 
Jungkook seemed distressed, his lips pressing together in worry as he watched you. But, after a few moments, he nodded and faced the door to give you your privacy. That was at least one kindness that could be afforded. 
You were woefully embarrassed to not only be changing in the same room as a man, but also by the attire he had provided you with. It was a dress that was thin and breathable with loose angel sleeves as well as a skirt that ended mid calf, it was made to offer mobility and comfort. You felt horribly exposed, the dress far too scandalous to be anything but sleep wear. You felt naked, in your village this would be just as bad as being naked. 
But it was either this, or nothing at all. 
“What are you going to do to me?” You asked, and despite your attempts, worry penetrated your words. 
He looked over his shoulder before slowly turning to face you, his dark eyes roaming over your body from head to toe in what could only be described as appreciation. He didn’t answer you, and from what you understood that was in his character. Instead he approached you and in turn you took several steps back until you were halted by the table behind you. He advanced and did not stop until there was barely an inch of space left in between you two. 
Your harsh swallow was cacophonous in the quiet cabin, your gaze was turned downward in an attempt to avoid his eyes. 
He softly lifted your head up with his thumb and forefinger on your chin, forcing you to look at him. Your hands gripped the table behind you in response, your eyes flickering off to the side in anxiety.
“I’m going to love you,” he whispered with a soothing tone as he retrieved a small silver jar from behind you filled with red pigment, “I’m going to protect you, and if anyone tries to take you from me I’ll slaughter them without hesitation.”
He gently smoothed your eyelids shut and proceeded to paint the red pigment over your eyes, over the crests of your cheekbones, and dragged down the hollows beneath your eyes. Even without seeing it, you could recognize the pattern as the same one he wore on his face in coal dust. 
“You are mine, and I am yours,” He said while cupping your cheeks tenderly and pressing his forehead against yours.
After Jungkook had finished preparing you, he grabbed you be the hand and lead you out of the house. The Direwolf was still there and it continued to follow the two of you around like, well like an overgrown puppy. 
Jungkook’s grip was firm but not painful, it was meant to keep you by his side. It was dark out, the dirt paths just barely lit by a line of torches leading toward the center of the ground where a massive until bonfire was constructed. And surrounding the unlit fire was a massive crowd of reapers as well as women dressed almost identically to yourself.
Your heart clenched in your chest, what was coming next? Were you going to be sacrificed? Roasted and cannibalized? Whatever is was, it wasn’t going to be good for you. 
You dug your heels into the ground, surprisingly, startling Jungkook. He turned to face you, the light of the torches glinting off of his piercing and the red hue of his lips. You hated to admit it, but he was painfully beautiful. With a strong jaw, prominent brows, dark eyes, and pouty lips, he was the most attractive man you had ever seen. He looked as if he belonged among nobility, not here, in the middle of the woods with a bunch of wild men. 
“Please,” You whispered, stepping closer so he could hear, “I need to know what’s going to happen to me.”
His jaw clenched, his lips pressed firmly together in thought. There was a beat of silence before he warily looked around and flipped your palm over so it was facing the sky. And then, he began to trace patterns, no, letters over the surface of your palm. 
You focused, memorizing the letters and stringing them together in your mind until they formed coherent words. Words that sent a violent chill throughout your entire body. 
“Run, don’t hide.”
~~~~~~~
The bonfire roared to life behind you as you sprinted through the forest, an eerie red glow casting long shadows all around you. The women that hadn’t figured out what was happening right away were far behind you, you had been granted a head start. But you knew that time was precious, eventually the reapers would descend and if they didn’t manage to catch you, you didn’t want to imagine was the Direwolves would do to you. 
You could only imagine that this was how they entertained themselves. Perhaps someone had not hired Jungkook to kill you, but instead like an apex predator he desired to hunt you. This had to be a game for them, whoever slaughtered the most people won. 
But then why did he tell you to keep running and not to hide? To lengthen the game? Or, if you hid, would the others find you? Did he want to claim your life instead?
Your legs and arms burned with exertion as you ran, the cool earth soggy and soft beneath your shoes that were most definitely not made for running. They were a size too small and pinched you in all of the worst places sending searing pain throughout the bottoms of your feet. You debated kicking them off but thought better of that, the nights were still freezing and if you managed to make it out of this alive you would prefer to keep all ten of your toes. 
Despite your head start you could still hear everything that happened behind you. You could hear the other women screaming and fighting for their lives and that only served as motivation, forcing you to push yourself past your limits and sprint faster than you ever had before. 
A scream parted your lips as a large black mass shot out of the trees and just barely brushed against you. You stumbled but did not fall and continued running but you couldn’t stop yourself from looking over your shoulder. Black fur and piercing blue eyes, it was Jungkook’s wolf who was pinning a reaper down to the ground. You watched as he snarled and lunged for the man’s neck and crushed it with one snap of it’s jaws before slowly dragging the corpse back into the trees and ripping his throat open. His blood rolled down his neck and practically sizzled from the cold air. 
Your stomach turned and your throat tightened, you were definitely running slower now from your nausea and the muscle fatigue. How had you not noticed the wolf tracking you? Or the reaper? They both had been perfectly silent, one with the forest, and you had not even realized that man had been less than a foot behind you. 
You were out of your depth, you were going to die. 
Your body had been rife with adrenaline at the beginning of this horrible race, and that still was present especially after what you had just experienced. But your mind was contesting your body and you were horribly frightened and confused. 
In your panicked state and the deep darkness of the night, you had failed to see it. A wire had been strung up and the minute you ran through it your ankles were caught, you tripped and fell and the wire wrapped smoothly around you ankles: binding them together. 
Someone had set traps before the start of the hunt, they had done something that felt an awful lot like cheating.
“No!” You cried, smacking your palm over your mouth from the volume, “No, no, no, please no,” You whispered.
You flipped yourself onto your back and sat upright, your hands instantly pulling at the wire and attempting to unravel it from your ankles. You hissed in pain, a stray tear falling from your eye as the wire slashed at the delicate skin of your palms - crimson blood beading up and slipping from the wound. 
You clenched your jaw tight to muffle your sounds of discomfort and got to work, whimpering at each slice as you pried the wire open and unwound it painstakingly slow. You grunted under your breath as you pulled it free, a clear indent left in the flesh of your ankles that was bloody and fresh. You let out a soft breath of relief before turning over onto your hands and knees, attempting to stand back up so that you could continue your escape. 
Before you could move any farther a boot connected with your back, forcing your down to the ground like a helpless bug. A sharp wheeze left your lungs as pain radiated through your back, your fingers curling into the dirt beneath you as you tried to drag yourself out from underneath whoever was pinning you down.
“There you are,” The man said with a pleased tone in the language you spoke. 
You cried out as he wove his gloved fingers into your hair and sharply yanked your head up by causing shocks of pain to blossom over your scalp. He turned your head to face him, his other hand tightly grasping your cheeks.
“Oh yeah, you’re Jungkook’s bitch,” He laughed, “You’re pretty too, that’ll make this hurt even more.” 
“Please, please let me go! I swear you’ll never see me again, I just want to go home!” You cried, emotion swelling up in your chest to the point where you couldn’t stop yourself from crying. 
You hated crying, you wanted to be strong but fuck, you were so scared. You knew that you were moments from dying, this had to be it and you weren’t ready. 
“And that’s exactly what I can’t have, what better way to piss that asshole off than to steal his woman from him? To make him see you everyday knowing I rightfully won you and he can’t do anything about it? Hell, I could even fuck you against the side of his house if I wanted to and he wouldn’t be able to do a fucking thing about it.” 
His woman? His woman?
You suddenly came to realize a horrific thought. They weren’t hunting for sport, they were hunting for wives.
“You’re a little older than I would have liked, but I’ll make do,” He sneered, flipping you over onto your back and straddling your waist. 
“Stop, let go of me!” You screamed, wriggling underneath him and hitting whatever part of his body you could reach. You caught him by surprise, your nails catching on his skin and dragging down over his face drawing blood beneath them.
“You fucking bitch!” He yelled, wiping the blood from his face before grasping your wrists and pinning them down to the ground and above your head. 
“I was going to be nice to you, ya know? But now, now I’m going to make you suffer,” He spat, the veins in his neck bulging with rage. 
You screamed, panicked sobs filling the air as he gripped your hands with one of his own, the other going for the waist of his pants. You knew what was coming next, you had heard the stories of what they did and all you could do was cry and struggle beneath him, he had you pinned well. 
You clenched your eyes shut, your lashes clumping together from the amount of tears you had shed. You didn’t want to look, didn’t want to see what was about to happen. 
In a last ditch effort, a small ember of hope, you screamed once more, “Jungkook!”
And it was all over in a flash. A warm, thick, wetness sprayed over your face  - a coppery taste misting over your lips as a gurgled, choked cry sounded from above you before the weight of the man fell off of you. 
You kept your eyes closed, still too afraid to move, your body was completely frozen against your own desire to flee. You jolted at the feeling of fingers ghosting over your cheek, fingers that were rough and coated with something that felt tacky. 
Warily, you opened your eyes. It was Jungkook. His mask was pulled down around his neck again, his expression was one of panic and rage. You swallowed harshly as he wiped away your tears and whatever was coating your face. You allowed yourself to take in the sight of him from head to toe and you were met with the startling realization that he was covered in blood. His forearms, his palms, his chest, and his boots, and not to mention the light smattering over his sharp jawline. 
He had killed many people tonight. 
Your eyes wandered behind him and on the ground a lifeless corpse was splayed out. It was the man that had captured you, his throat was savagely slashed so deeply you thought you could see bone. 
You frantically began to rub at your face, the white sleeves of your dress stained with dirt and blood rubbing roughly against your skin. You were certain your face would be raw by the time you were done. 
You hadn’t even realized you were panicking, frantically mumbling sentences that didn’t make sense as you attacked your own face, until he spoke. 
“Sh, sh, sh,” He hushed you, pulling your hands from your face, “It’s over, you’re safe now.” 
Your body froze, it took you a few moments to realize that you could understand him, this was the first time he had spoken your language. 
“Please, I want to go home now,” You whispered, your hands limp beneath his as your shoulders shook. 
“I’ll take you home,” He nodded, standing up and helping you to your feet. Your knees were still weak, your ankles protesting as they continued to bleed. You were sure they were going to get infected at this rate. 
“You’re hurt?” He asked, his voice much softer than you had anticipated. You merely nodded in response. 
He recognized those marks, they were from a specific snare that only reapers used. And, on the night of the hunt, they were banned. His jaw clenched in anger, he was trying his best not to explode, not to scare you. His rage would be wasted, after all he had already killed that bastard and his little band of low-lives. Just as he had suspected, they were all after you that night.
He stepped forward, opening his arms to pick you up. You jerked away, your body still trying to protect you - not sensing that the danger had passed. Or was it right? Jungkook was one of them, he had marked you, brought you here, he was just as dangerous. 
“I won’t hurt you,” He said, trying to keep his voice calm and soothing, “You need my help.”
As reluctant as you were to admit it, he was right, you wouldn’t be able to walk all the way back with him, you were in far too much pain. You nodded slowly before inching towards him and allowing him to gently cradle you to his chest. 
Jungkook paused once he adjusted you in his hold. Your face was still stained just as badly as the rest of him despite your frantic attempts to clean yourself. The makeup that has once been on your face was smudged and dissolved by your tears. But, you had made it. He knew he chose you for a reason, you had ran the farthest, you had outrun so many men and the ones you couldn’t he and his wolf dispatched. 
His heart thumped in anxiety as he looked over his shoulder where the bloody snare laid. You had been so close.
Another two feet, and you would have broken their borders and had been free to go.
~~~~~~~
The bonfire was still burning just as strongly as it had been at the start of the hunt. That led you to believe that it had not lasted as long as you thought it would. The reapers were proficient hunters and killers just like the Direwolves that protected their lands. It was foolish to believe that anything about this would have been challenging for them. 
Upon your arrival you were met with the sight of a substantial crowd. All of your fellow runners were there each in a different state of despair and disbelief. But besides them, there were many newcomers that you had not seen before. There were families, large families. Mother’s occupied with their babies, young children giggling as they chased one another, and the glowing eyes of the Direwolves surveying, their massive bodies folded into themselves as they laid on the ground by the tree line. 
They were on guard, not from outside threats, but guarding the way out. It would be suicide for anyone who tried to leave. You had seen what those wolves could do, you would not dare try to leave with them here. 
“What is this?” You asked Jungkook who had set you down on a soft cushion a fair distance from the fire. 
“A celebration,” He explained “For good fortune and prosperous futures.” 
Prosperous futures? What future could anyone have after this? That was of course, if he was lying to you. If he didn’t know that you knew what all of this was really about. 
“So it has nothing to do with the fact that you chose me to be your wife?”
Jungkook flinched, his doe eyes widening in surprise before a small smile crept onto his lips, “You figured it out then? I knew you were smart, that was one of the reasons I chose you. I could see the cleverness in those eyes from a mile away.” 
You shifted uncomfortably underneath his stare before straightening your spine, attempting to appear far more confident than you felt.
“I’m not yours, I never will be.”
His lips twitched into a frown, “You were mine the second I laid eyes on you. You accepted my gifts, my proposal, and I caught you fairly. This may not be conventional in your village but it is tradition in mine. You bare my mark, you followed me here willingly, and we completed the ceremony. You are mine and I am yours in a way that is far more binding than any church could declare. Do you understand me?” 
He was thoroughly angered, you could practically feel the heat simmering off of him, stronger than the fire that was not too far away. You watched as he stood, dragging one of several large barrels filled to the brim with water over to you. He grabbed a spare cloth and dunked it into the water before dropping down to his knees and beginning to clean your hands and feet, removing the dirt and blood from beneath your nails and the wounds on your ankles. 
You watched him work for a moment, his brows furrowed in irritation as well as focus. Behind him several reapers watched on in astonishment, several looks of surprise as well as disapproval coloring their features.��
“Why are they staring at us?” You whispered, curling into yourself from the attention. 
“It is tradition for the spouse to cleanse the reaper after the ceremony, not the other way around,” He mumbled, grabbing a new cloth for your face. 
His intense, dark eyes bore into your own as he cleaned the blood from your cheeks, “I am willing to break tradition for you, rules for you, does that not prove that I am yours as much as you are mine?” 
Your heart thumped against your will. Adoring words like those should not leave the mouth of a killer so easily. 
“I can’t be yours.”
“And why is that?”
“I,” You swallowed harshly, the words burning your tongue before your could even form them, “I am promised to Lord Ilseong.”
Fire blossomed in his eyes, those dark coals igniting in an instant. You had never seen hatred grow so quickly in a man or woman’s eyes before and it genuinely frightened you. 
“Lord Ilseong?” He hissed, his strong shoulders squared and tensed. 
“Y-yes,” You stuttered, unnerved by the sudden shift in demeanor, “He will come for me, you must know that. I am his betrothed.”
Jungkook said nothing, instead he quickly rose to his feet and grabbed you firmly by the wrist, pulling you in the direction of his cabin where his wolf still laid in waiting. You struggled to keep up with his pace, stumbling over your own feet as you were nearly dragged by him into his home. 
“What are you doing?! You said you would take me home!”
“And I did not lie to you, this is home, our home now.”
“Lord Ilseong-”
“Say his name one more time,” He warned as he fixed you with an intense glare, “One more time, and I’ll make sure mine is the only one you’ll be able to remember.” 
You froze, your body refusing to move as you were pinned in place by his intimidating glare. You had been tossed from one fire into another. From one lecherous old man to a wild young one. You had yet to decide which was worse. 
“Why do you hate him so?” You asked, surprised you were able to voice such a question when he was clearly on edge. 
He laughed, a bitter and cruel sound. You could see his shoulders shaking in barely contained rage. He did not hate him, he loathed his entire existence. 
“Why do I hate him?” He echoed, his jaw clenched tightly, “Lord Ilseong is my father.”
You couldn’t stop your jaw from dropping, he had taken you completely by surprise. Jungkook looked nothing like Lord Ilseong, Jungkook was far too beautiful. But, if you looked hard enough, the faintest traces of him were there, in his jaw and brow, but for the most part you could conclude that Jungkook was blessed with his mother’s features.
“That…that’s not possible! The lady was never able to conceive a child. Lord Ilseong has no children.”
“None that were legitimate. No, I am his bastard. And I had quite a few siblings to show for his unfaithfulness. He sought out any pretty face he could and took them with or without their regard. That is something that all reapers have in common, we are the rejected children of nobility and we have come to reap what they have sown.”
You could see it now. Many of the reapers you had seen at the fire were painfully attractive, the offspring of beautiful people who had been abused and taken advantage of. And in turn they were rejected by those who had given them life. But just like the nobility they had been born from, they too were tainted with corruption, that much was evidenced by your capture and what had almost transpired before Jungkook had slain that man in the forest. 
“That is why he wishes to marry me, to finally have a legitimate child to continue his legacy.” You confirmed. You had thought before he was a perverted old man, and that much was true, but he had much bigger plans. 
“He what?!” Jungkook was seething. 
“That was what he told my father, he wished for me to give him many children.”
As soon as you were finished speaking, you could see him snap. He grabbed you by the wrist and dragged you to the back of the house where his bedroom was. He slammed the door shut and pushed you firmly in the chest causing you to stumble back onto his bed. 
“He has taken everything from me, but this I will finally take from him.” He said, tugging your skirt up just as he had done the week before spurring a squeal from your lips. 
The red mark was still there on your thigh. No amount of scrubbing from you or your mother has managed to remove it from you skin. You gasped as he dropped to his knees and leaned over you, pressing a fervent kiss to the mark while his hand gripped your other thigh.  
“This means that you are mine, I found you first, I chose you first. You have a purpose here, you are important here. Make no mistake I am not giving you a choice, you will not return to him. But if you try to run know this, a life with him will be one of misery and suffering. Here, I am offering you my love, my soul, whatever it is you desire. But in return I desire the same. And if you were to offer those to anyone else I would kill them without hesitation.”
You sat there in shock. Never had a man ever knelt before you in such a position, in submission. No man had ever declared such a violent love for you. 
You knew, despite Jungkook’s vehement denial, that you did have choices and there were three. 
The first was to return with Lord Ilseong when he inevitably came for you. And what would come of that. A life of misery, Jungkook had said. You would be doomed to marry a man nearly thrice your age, endure a horrific wedding night and several more like it until you missed your cycle, and then give birth. And that would continue over and over again until he died, an endless cycle to ensure he would have a pool of children to choose from in the event that his first born perished or, worse in his eyes, was a girl. And the thought of him, his wrinkled hands, touching your body had your stomach churning. You would rather fight the Direwolves.
The second was to run, to go back home. But that posed several problems. For one, your father would never take you back. You would become his greatest disappointment just as quickly as you had become his pride. He would send for Lord Ilseong and your fate would be sealed. Or, more likely, Jungkook would find you first. And you knew then that your family would no longer be safe.
The third option, the final option, was just as difficult as the first. And that was to stay with Jungkook and his reapers. To be his wife.  You would be trapped with the man who had captured you, who had stolen you from your home. You would stand by for years on end, watching the cycle continue as people were either slaughtered for money, or were captured to be wed. But, you would still have some freedom. You wouldn’t be “broken like a mare” as his lordship has said. You would still be where you thrived, in nature. And your “husband” would not be an old decrepit man. As unwilling as you were to admit it, the thought of Jungkook touching you was not entirely repulsive. Had he been another village boy, had he been sweet, innocent, and kind, you would have jumped at the chance to be betrothed to him. 
Jungkook was the lesser of evils. 
“Let me have you,” He said, his hands stroking slowly up and down the expanse of your thighs which had pressed themselves together tightly out of not only anxiety but something else all together. It was a horrible, addicting blend. 
And you couldn’t help but think to yourself, what better way to spite that old man than to lose your innocence to his bastard. You knew that Lord Ilseong would come, without a doubt he would not let you be free. But when he came with his army and slaughtered the reapers you would be free. Jungkook would be dead and the Lord would not take you, you who were no longer a virgin and tainted by his illegitimate son. Jungkook was right, you were clever. 
You finally met his gaze, his head still craned up to look at you. There was something enticing about having a powerful man on his knees. You had never had power, you were always the pawn. 
And so, when his hands moved higher, fiddling with the hem of your undergarments, you did not stop him. As nervous as you were, frightened as you were, this was a part of your plan and you would see through it. You would do it if it meant you could have your freedom. 
And anyone else was better than Ilseong.  Especially the attractive man that knelt before you like a devout worshiper at his altar. If you were lucky, he would not make it hurt. 
A desperate sigh left his lips as he rolled your skirt up over your hips and hastily removed your undergarments before pulling you to the edge of his bed and forcing your legs over his shoulders as his head disappeared in between your thighs.
You shrieked in surprise as you felt his lips meet the skin of your inner thigh. His hands were holding your hips tightly, preventing you from moving as he left long, lingering kisses there. His lips were surprisingly soft, wet, and warm, creating an unfamiliar ache at the apex of your thighs. Your hips twitched without your permission, writhing in an attempt to get him to do something your body understood better than your mind. His soft laugh vibrated against your thigh, his dark eyes shooting up to look at you in a way that could only be described as mischievous before he ducked his head down and his lips met a place you had not dared to touch. 
A cry of shock broke free from your lips, your head falling back and your chest heaving in pleasure. 
“W-what? Jungkook wait-” You stuttered in confusion, your words easily silenced by the strokes of his tongue. 
The entire inner workings of what happened between a husband and wife on their wedding night was a mystery to you. And that was not your fault. Mothers and fathers often kept that from their daughters, too afraid to tell them too much lest they learn how to rid themselves of their virginity before they marry. Your mother had told you enough the day you were to be sent to Lord Ilseong, but this, this was a far cry from what she had told you. 
Despite your pleas he did not slow down, in fact he only became that much more enthusiastic. Your arms turned to jello, collapsing out from underneath you sending your back down to the mattress as your legs shook around his head. You could feel him groaning against you sending vibrations all throughout your core, it was like he was the one receiving immense pleasure and not you.
It felt like he wanted to devour you.  
He broke away once to catch his breath, his shoulders heaving as he panted. 
“So pretty for me,” He mumbled, his voice much lower than before and riddled with lust. 
You jolted with a strangled moan as he pressed a long, lingering kiss to that place once more before his fingers firmly stroked up and down the length of your sex, just barely sinking in to your entrance in a teasing manner that had your hips bucking pitifully against his iron grip. He would to decided to give you what you needed when he wanted to. The chase had been great fun, but the capture was the true reward and he planned to thoroughly enjoy it. 
“So sensitive,” He laughed, pushing your hips down, “Have you never been touched before?”
Your eyes were clenched shut, your mouth twisted into a frown as he continued his touches that still left behind a pleasant thrum but also an intense ache as he deliberately avoided every part that would provide you pleasure. 
As soon as he realized you weren’t paying attention his withdrew his fingers  and you could only whine from the lack of his touch.
“I asked you a question,” He said, very clearly waiting for your response. 
“No,” You admitted despite your embarrassment. 
His face was set with determination and glee, he was happy to know that he would have you first in every aspect. 
You wriggled away from him as he stood up, joining you on the bed and attempting to remove your dress. You had never been exposed to someone else before and while you felt desire burning inside you the thought of him seeing you bare was frightening. But he smiled at your bashful actions and he knew that he would have to rid you of your clothes quickly. 
You froze as he removed a very familiar knife from the strap on his leg, your heart beating louder than thunder. Maybe he had been planning to kill you all along, maybe he was finally going to do it. 
But instead of killing you like you thought he would, he pulled your dress taut and with one impressive slash slit it open from the bottom to the top. Your chest heaved against the cool metal of the blade that now rested at your breasts - the feeling just as exhilarating as it was frightening. 
“Easy, little lamb,” He cooed, setting the knife aside, “What use would I have for a lovely, dead, wife?”
You watched in awe as he stripped down, revealing every inch of honey skin and toned muscle. But, more surprisingly, and arm full of tattoos. He had always kept one arm bare and the other covered. The covered one hiding the collection of inked markings on his arm as well as the reaper’s mark on his chest, the mark that you shared with him on your thigh. He quickly noticed where your attention strayed to. 
“Each one signifies something different. Some of them are milestones, ranks, and others represent kills,” He explained, grabbing your hand and resting it on his bicep, encouraging you to touch him. 
Your fingers smoothed over the scarred skin, enraptured by the sight. You had never seen so many markings on one person. You could only assume Jungkook had killed many, many people. 
He sighed at the feeling of your touch, eagerly wrapping his arms around your body and pulling you onto his lap, pressing your chest against his firmly so that there was no space left in between you two. Your body was rapidly heating up, the feeling of his strong thighs and hardened manhood beneath you only making the fire in your veins burn hotter. 
He gently cradled your jaw with one hand, the other spread over your ribcage just beneath the swell of your breast. And, with a surprising tenderness, he pressed his lips against yours in a soft, slow, sweet kiss. But it did not remain soft for long, his hold grew firmer, his kisses more intense and hard like he could not get enough of you, like he needed you more than air itself. 
And, with a flood of heat, you realized that he had kissed you in-between your legs before stealing your first kiss from your lips.
“Don’t be afraid of me,” He whispered against your mouth, misreading your trembling body, “I’ll never hurt you, I only want to pleasure you.” 
And he followed through on his promise. You had never thought that hands that could bring death could also bring pleasure, but you had been mistaken. In the veil of darkness, under the absence of the moon, the two of you indulged in a night of debauchery. 
You had been told that this night would be painful, that you would cry and wish it had never happened. But instead you had found immense satisfaction and a desire for more. While your life had been riddled with misfortune you had been granted one ounce of relief - Jungkook was a gifted lover. So gifted in fact that you found yourself unwilling to part from him, your hold on his body almost as strong as his grasp on you. Your nails had found themselves embedded in his back, raking down the once smooth skin and leaving marks of your own on him. You were certain that your inner thighs would be bruised from just how tightly you encircled his waist. You had allowed a part of yourself to escape that you did not recognize. 
“My good little wife, taking me so well,” He had moaned into your ear, his hips desperately rutting against yours. “Absolutely perfect for me.”
And he continued on like that, whispering praises into your ear and bringing you to the edge over and over and over again, his stamina prevailing even as you weakly mewled and attempted to draw away from him, every inch of your body screaming in oversensitivity but even then that pain felt horribly good. 
“You can take another, for me, I know you can handle it,” He growled out from behind gritted teeth, at this point he had become more animalistic than man.
“I can’t -”
“You can, and you will.”
That was something you had come to learn about Jungkook. He always followed through on his promises as well as his threats. 
When he had finished for the second and final time he held you close to his chest, the scent of sweat and intimacy still fresh in the air as you unwillingly began to doze off, all of your energy completely drained from your body after not only the intense coupling but all of the energy you had expended prior running for your life. 
But as you drifted off you were reminded of exactly why you had done this in the first place. You still were meant to leave, you still craved your freedom. 
All it took was one sentence from Jungkook to remind you of your plan. As long as you stayed complacent you would never be free. 
“I can’t wait to see what you’ll like, round with my children.”
This was what he had meant by “prosperous futures.”
~~~~~~~
The next morning you were abruptly awoken by the scent of smoke thick in the air and the sound of harsh pounding on the front door. 
The space beside you was empty and faintly warm, Jungkook had been up for a little while. You could hear his voice now as well as another reaper’s. 
“What is it?” Jungkook’s voice.
“We’ve spotted a decent band of soldiers a few miles out, they definitely belong to a nobleman from the crests they carry. They’ve set fire to the forests, they’re trying to burn everything down in sight - they’re either looking for us, someone else, or both.”
“How much time do we have?”
“Not much, the scouts we sent ahead have returned so I imagine that the soldiers can’t be that far behind. We’ve been ordered to to go ahead and assume our positions, the rest will evacuate.”
“Is that necessary?” 
“For now, yes. For everyone else’s sake, they’ll only get in the way. Once we clean this mess up everyone will be escorted back. But we need you too, we can’t do it without you.” 
“I understand,” Jungkook reluctantly said, “Thank you, Hoseok.”
You sat up in bed, the blanket tightly wrapped around your body as Jungkook came in. He looked distressed not because of the impending fight, that he was familiar with, but because you would be leaving.  And while he wished he could trust you after what happened the night before, he knew that he couldn’t. When given the opportunity to flee, he was certain his little lamb would run for safer pastures. 
He dressed you quickly, helping you pull on a long-sleeved shirt and a pair of pants, men’s clothing. You had never worn men’s clothing before. 
“Easier to run in, if they come for you, you have to be ready to run.” He explained, bending down to help you lace up the boots on your feet.  
“Don’t be afraid, Fang will protect you while I’m gone.”
“Fang?” You asked. 
“My wolf.”
So, that was its name. How uncreative. 
Jungkook paused, his brows pinched in stress as he looked at you. This was happening too quickly. He thought he had some time before Ilseong and his men would come, time that would get you to trust him. 
He stepped forward, cradling your face before pressing his lips to yours again. You had found that each kiss with Jungkook was different and new. This one was desperate, this one felt like a promise, a promise to see you again. 
“I love you,” He said, his dark eyes wide and glistening, “Come back to me.”
You could only stare back at him, you refused to make a promise you could not keep. You were going to try to leave if you could and you would not lie to him. 
Fang was waiting outside, pacing impatiently and whining in the back of his throat. The Direwolf was agitated, you would be too if your home was burning. 
“Follow him, he will take you somewhere safe. I will see you again, that is a promise.” Jungkook said before giving you one more final parting kiss and melting into the tree line. 
Jungkook always followed through on his promises and his threats. 
A few moments later you heard the cries of wounded men from the forest. The soldiers had arrived and they had not anticipated the reapers armed with bows and arrows high in the trees. It was foolish to try and ambush trained killers, that was something you had forgotten. The chances were that Jungkook would not die today, no, that army would. You had to move, now. 
Fang moved swiftly beside you and, to your surprise, split off from the evacuating party. He was taking you somewhere else, perhaps a safe place the Jungkook had in case something like this were to happen. A place where he could find you again. 
You were caught in a rock and a hard place. You had seen Fang tear into that reaper the night before, you had watched him consume him with no regret. He and Jungkook were bonded, but you were not. You did not want to test him and see if he would deliver upon you the same fate. It was another waiting game. 
Your only other plan would be to follow him to the safe point and try and make your break from there. But, even then, you were certain that Direwolves had impeccable senses. And, like the reapers, Fang would have no problem hunting you. 
The massive wolves' steps were hard to keep up with, you were practically jogging in an attempt to stay by his side. He was tense, his ears flicking now and then as he listened for a threat, his piercing blue eyes scanning the trees. Direwolves seemed far more human than regular wolves, especially with their intelligence. 
 Fang froze, sniffing the air rapidly before his hackles raised and a deep growl left him that was so loud it shook the ground beneath you. He backed up, his large body shielding your own as he waited for the threat to emerge. 
And it was quite a threat. Lord Ilseong had not only sent one army but two. One surveying and burning one side of the forest, and another scouting the other side. And they too were armed, smaller than the other force, but still armed. 
Fang lunged instantly, his jaw snapping down on three men at once and wildly shaking them around like they weighed nothing while blood and their screams filled the air.  
And then you were off. 
Once more, you had found yourself running for your life in the woods. Although this time you were much more efficient. The clothes Jungkook had given you were, in fact, much easier to run in. And now that the sun was out the forest was perfectly illuminated allowing you to see every fallen tree, root, and stump in your path. 
You were going to run until you couldn’t anymore. This time, this time for sure you would make it out, you would be able to be free again. 
At least, that was what you had thought, that was what you had hoped for. You had been wrong. 
The trees were beginning to thin out, and what you had thought to be the clearing to a village turned out to be the small resting place of the noble army that had been abandoned save for guardsmen and of course, Lord Ilseong himself. 
“My bride, there you are!” He called excitedly causing you to stumble backward, ready to begin running in the opposite direction but you were quickly stopped by his guards behind you. 
“I have been looking all over for my pretty little bride, when my men found your carriage overturned we had assumed the worst.” He explained, coming to stand right in front of you leaving you with no exit to run to. 
“What is this that you’re wearing?” He sneered, “What happened to the robes I sent you?”
He was more worried about the damn clothes than you, not that you cared at all what he felt for you but if he claimed to want you as his Lady you would think he would show an ounce of worry for your state of being. 
“They were stolen from me, forgive me.” You said, your hands clenched into fists. 
Lord Ilseong did not care, his beady eyes were still trained on the shirt and pants that donned your body.
“These are a man’s clothes!” He yelled, grasping the collar of the shirt and jerking it so strongly that it tore, the fabric falling to expose the column of your neck, your collarbones, and your left shoulder. 
“Infidelity!” He screamed, rage burning red under his skin as he saw the marks that Jungkook had left the night before. A good portion of your body was littered with bruises but that spot was by far the worst, deep dark marks were clustered together along with a clear bite mark. 
“It-it’s not what you think your grace!” You cried in an attempt to save yourself. Your eyes were burning and your heart was pounding, you knew what was going to come next. 
“Do you know what the price of unfaithfulness is?” He hissed, his men forcing you down to your knees before him. 
You whimpered as you heard the familiar sound of a sword being unsheathed, the metal glinting in the sun as it was passed to Ilseong. 
“The penalty is death.” 
You squeezed your eyes shut as warm tears attempted to fall. You refused to cry this time, you were done crying. And now, as you faced your certain death you refused to show this man your tears. This man was punishing you for a crime you did not commit against a relationship you did not have. A relationship you never wanted. 
“What a shame, I had such high hopes for you, but you were just another common whore.” He seethed as he raised the sword above his head.
A sharp whistle shot by your ears and then another, the sound of something cutting through the air quickly. And almost immediately after two loud thuds sounded. 
You cracked open your eyes to see the two guards laying limp on the forest floor, an arrow embedded in each of their throats. You peered over your shoulder and there, blending into the shadows of the trees sat a reaper high up in its branches. He was the man from this morning, Hoseok. 
And if Hoseok was here, that meant - 
Two more arrows sliced through the air, one piercing Ilseong’s left hand causing him to drop the sword and scream in pain only for another arrow to pierce his right hand. Both of his arms were spread out, each hand pinned to a tree and unable to move. He was defenseless. 
Jungkook emerged from the shadows and behind him, Fang followed closely. Blood was matted into his fur, some was his own but the majority of it was not. 
And Jungkook, he was trembling in rage. 
“All you do is take. You took my mother from me, her life, my sibling's lives, and then you steal my wife from me not once but twice. Your judgment had been long awaited by not only myself but everyone under your rule.”
For the first time, Ilseong looked frightened like he was staring death in the face. Not unlike how you had been moments before.
“I promise you that I will take everything from you. Your riches, your land, and your life. That, that is the penalty for trying to murder another man’s wife.”
“J-Jungkook, I’m your father, have mercy, please!”
“Did you show my sisters mercy when you slaughtered them in their sleep? Or my brothers when you had your men shoot them down in the fields? Or my mother when you strangled her to death?!” He said, his voice growing louder and louder as his rage rolled off of him in waves. 
“Please, I’ll give you whatever you want, anything!” Ilseong begged, his eyes wide in fright and panic.
“I want your life,” Jungkook said before picking up the sword from the ground and began hacking away without hesitation, once, twice, and three times until Ilseong’s head came lose from his neck and fell away his body going completely limp - only being held up by the arrows that still kept his decapitated body upright. 
You couldn’t stop the raw scream that ripped freely from your throat. You had never seen a sight so horrific before, so violent and unforgiving. That image would forever be burned in your mind, haunting you each time to tried to sleep. 
You watched in horror as Fang approached, grabbing what remained of Ilseong in his strong jaws and ripping his corpse free from the tree, dragging it back into the forest where he would no doubt be consumed.
“You shall reap what you sow.” Jungkook and Hoseok spoke in unison like it was a ritual. 
Jungkook’s shoulders finally relaxed, the sword dropping from his hand as he turned to look at you. Blood was heavy on his face, covering the left side of it almost entirely. But he still smiled at you, the blood on his face making his teeth seem unbearably white only making your stomach turn ten times worse. 
You whimpered in fright as he approached you, settling down in a crouch in front of you before tugging you into his arms. The scent of blood was ever stronger now as his hands smoothed up and down your back. 
“Remember what I told you little lamb?” He grinned, “Without hesitation.” 
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l0mljeonjungkook · 2 days ago
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REWARD (JJK x Reader) POSTED
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PREVIEW || REWARD (read here) || Masterlist (oneshot)
You're so heartwarmingly cheery to fill his not only ears with the news but lips with a bright beam that only lightens your day and soul, but the same news shrinks your heart at the same time, why??
Going to University, sure that's what you dreamt of for so long before your heart agreed that the affection you feel for your best friend is not just some care or friendship but - love, forthwith your dream which you fed with your love, your sweat, your tears, your hard work, and your time is in your hand right now, on your mail.
You certainly want to share it with him, but you aren't sure about it, whether you should or not, surely he'll be the happiest and maybe more than you, and thats what shakes your soul, questioning you.
Are you really prepared for going to the new place where you won't even get a sight of him the way you get right now?
Every day?
The answer is a million times - No!
Are you ready for that? Certainly not!
Will you survive? Not even a heartbeat!
In your heart, you two are together in there living happily ever after with your best friend, who's living next to your apartment, except that there's a wall between your apartments. A bridge of stones between two souls, a dam between two hearts overflowing with love for one another, two friends who are wildly in love with each other yet oblivious.
You two are like one body and two souls, never alone. People know if they saw one of you at parties there's no shadow of a doubt that the second ain't there. Jealous filthy whores, burn on smolder of their burning hearts with envy, on seeing you with the sexiest yet kindest guy at your university, and you ain't less than a fucking bitch, clinging to Jungkook's arms around them made your blood tainted with serene reach to all the ends of your body.
You two, unhesitatingly and tirelessly stood by each other - through every thick and thin, shared every emotion, every little secret which was meant to be buried was ever buried between you two, defending each other not merely in front of douchebags but also, in front of your teachers, and parents too if all else fails. This is what you treasured since kindergarten, you two had an unbreakable bond. Then why won't anyone be jealous of you two?
But this guy had an issue with you whenever you were in a relationship with someone, Jungkook never let you breathe in peace. "You've changed", "you're my best friend first then his girlfriend", "I have all rights reserved on you, you were, are, and forever will be mine", but your favorite to date - those words that still pool the heartwarming rush of warmth between your legs "leave him, we both are enough for one another" and whatnot.
Save for the fact, this guy won't let you stay here after knowing what this really means to you, but he doesn't know this about your mind, you left that dream, the day your drunk neighbor confessed what your heart's been alarming you.
That - "I love you, since the day you came in my life y/n when we were friends, then you followed me", he took a sip of wine from his cup, " all the way from Busan to Seattle with-- your bags in one hand and the keys in another to the apartment next to mine, since then my-- my life--".
This is what he whisperingly confessed in your ear and all the drunkenness you wooed by drinking six cups of wine all that headed to the hills at those three words. But your soul screams at those unsatisfactorily unfinished words and now you curse your bestie Yoongi every fucking night for bringing another cup of alcohol that led him eat those words back again. You don't get it why is he treasuring those words? My life - what my life, you want to know what all he has in his heart. Those three words, I love you - seeped into your soul, have been living there with your love for him, since then.
But the heart-shattering truth - that asshole doesn't remember at all.
That sometimes soothes you but 99.999% time heats your soul, your skin, and your body to the nuclear level.
Jungkook, still waiting for the news of you being accepted to the University with receiving a full-tuition scholarship, was only making him quiz you every fucking day. This was not solely yours but now his dream too as if he wants you out of his sight or maybe... maybe is waiting for what you have been waiting and it's better to put an end to those questions.
And the reason why you decide to jump from your balcony to his is that's what you two always do. At any time of the day, whether day or night, though you don't intend to interfere in either's privacy you two haven't learned anything than being the irksome element in either's life. Not banging the doors to meet the other, you two jump from your balcony to the other and bang the windows of either room.
Whenever you peep inside through the window, you either find him eating or playing fucktons of games on his mobile. You were going to hammer the window to make him know who's here, but, today, it's different, you retreive your hand back as your mouth forms an O, and by different, this is not what you expected him to do.
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whatifyoulivelikethat · a month ago
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aftermath, m | jjk
pairing(s): jungkook x reader
summary: The aftermath of the break-up between you and Jeon Jungkook, navigating the various stages and finding out that easy isn't living.
warnings: rated M (18+) for language; it's what you think it is but also not; mentions of alcohol consumption; anger turning into angst; slow burn; yes, there are a few Taylor Swift references; smut (fem reader, heavy making out, breathplay, hair pulling, slight D/s dynamic, handjob, nipple play, edging, penetrative sex); non-idol!AU - ex!JK x ex!reader, switches between Jungkook’s POV and yours, ft mystery man (less mysterious if you Google his name lol), yes, he was chosen for story reasons
--
“Stop staring at her.”
Maybe if he stared long enough, he would burn holes into the back of your skull and you would finally fuckin’ notice he was right here.
Maybe.
“Dude. You’re being creepy.”
You were smiling at your phone screen. Why the fuck were you smiling? What was there to be smiling about? Furthermore, what did you need to look so good for? Oversized black bomber jacket with balloon sleeves and an overpowering ruffle at the shoulders. Short slinky dress with red-orange flames screen-printed all over. Black thigh-high heeled boots. Fuck, who the hell were you trying to impress? The person texting you, hah? Why did your hair look so effortlessly in place and why was your makeup so sultry with that red stain on your lips and smoked-out liner? Hm?!
Jeon Jungkook chewed on the left side of his lip and watched you walk up to the service counter, ordering a…
“Lemon cake and hot green tea. No sugar in the tea.”
“Bro, just get up and talk to her.”
Jungkook felt knuckles whack the back of his head and turned around to the annoyed face of Park Jimin, who was nursing an iced coffee and glaring at him. Oh. Right. He was supposed to be catching up at with his friend, not going all National Geographic at his ex-girlfriend.
But what were you so happy for?
“Didn’t you break up with her? What’s your problem?” Jimin questioned, confused.
His teeth involuntarily slid back and ground bone-to-bone, eyes narrowing at the questions. Jungkook wanted to tell Jimin to shut up, but then your voice came back to him, if you want to react less emotionally, you have to take the time to sort through your initial reaction and the other options. So, instead, he picked up his lukewarm coffee and tapped the bottom edge against the table, thinking aout the other, less emotional responses he could have.
“Yeah.”
Mmm.
Eloquent.
Came out a little gruffier than he wanted, but too late now.
Jimin frowned. “You never said why. I thought you were head over heels for her.”
He clicked his tongue and restrained himself from looking back. You would pick a table further away from the counter. Perhaps near the window. But why were you here? You used to come here with him. Conversations and dates. Who were you meeting? But if you were meeting someone, you wouldn’t have ordered before they arrived. Hm. Then there was the whole situation with the way you were smiling at your phone.
Like you were amused.
Playful.
Fuck.
“Hello? Earth to Jungkook, do you copy?”
He blinked hard and bit on his straw, not sulking but sulking. “S’nothing.” Great, he was mumbling now. Surefire sign you’re upset, you always reminded him. Everyone can tell. Just say it. “Actually, that why I wanted to talk to you.”
Those bright eyes and full lips turned into little circles. “Huh?”
Jungkook cleared his throat and glanced at Jimin under his hair. Furrowed brows and balancing his long, tattooed fingers on the lid of his ice coffee, not wanting to ask but asking anyway, because his ex-girlfriend seemed to be fucking fine visiting the places they used to visit and smiling like she was cool with not being with him anymore and that sucked, but it was easier to be mad than sad. He didn’t want to be sad in front of people.
Especially in front of people he was close to.
Especially in front of you.
So, Jungkook stayed mad.
“Did you hook-up with my ex or not?”
Jimin blinked at him.
“Hah?”
Shit.
-
You cut into the lemon cake, chewing thoughtfully.
A quick look at your nails and, shit, you should really repaint them before they started looking too rough. Two weeks was about as long as you could go before the nail growth was somewhat unbearable. This was about halfway through week three. Good preparation and high-quality polish could only get you so far before life eventually wore the manicure down.
Sigh.
Today was the first day you had decided to walk out and do something by yourself that wasn’t work, grocery shopping, or… wait, that was it. You had no other reason to go outside. Ack. You had another bite of cake. Been a while since you had this taste.
Your phone hummed on the table.
With your left ring finger, you checked your messages. And then you paused, because instead of reading a text, you were looking at a soundwave.
Voice message.
You reached over to your cup of hot tea, taking a sip and letting it scald you.
Breathed in and breathed out in a calm hiss, thinking.
Chewed on cake.
Ugh. You didn’t want to be that girl. But what were you gonna do? Almost eight billion people in this world and you were going to be hung up over one? One? And, anyway… In terms of too fast or too slow, you never knew what could happen, right? You hadn’t known with him, and you wouldn’t know with this one unless you started actually talking to him instead of skirting around with surface level shit. You hated that, so you shouldn’t do it. Your brain prodded you annoyingly with thoughts. Don’t be a hypocrite. Stop fucking around. Argh, okay. Okay. Fine.
You reached over to your phone and let it hover over the play button.
Wait.
Maybe you should listen to it in the car.
Yeah.
You put your phone back down and resumed eating and drinking.
You weren’t avoiding it. Okay, kinda. There was no point in dancing around the issue when you were by yourself. Get to the point. You came here specifically because it used to be your favorite café and it still was. It had nice memories attached to it, but then you stopped visiting it after… him. And for what? Did you combust from reminiscing? No. You were eating cake and having tea like you always did. The snack was just as tasty alone as it was with a partner. You were talking with another guy and you could bring him here eventually if you felt like it.
Maybe you should have been mad or sad about the whole Jeon Jungkook thing, but at this point it was just wasted energy and you were tired.
Tired of not feeling like yourself, tired if feeling like you couldn’t do things because you were reminded of him. So what? Everyone had good and bad. He wasn’t that bad of a guy. Faults were faults, and you had to decide if you could live with them or not.
Or he could decide, and start a dumbass argument.
Honestly, that was what you were most salty about. Yes, it was your nature to fight fire with fire, but you shouldn’t have. At least not so explosively. You were glad Jungkook hadn’t met your teenage self, that was for sure. Still, you had that habit of not mentioning when you were experiencing a bad day. Of course, they happened and without reason, same shit, different day. Those sorts of negative thoughts came in waves, after all. Mostly you didn’t want Jungkook to hover over you and try to make you feel better, because he would do so, and, if what he tried didn’t work, then he would be depressed and then it would begin, the endless cycle of you feeling like crap, him feeling like crap, so on and so forth until you felt better so he could feel better. Same shit, different day. Tiring. So, sometimes you didn’t mention bad days, but if he caught you on a bad day and acted emotionally, which did happen, it ended…
Poorly.
Jungkook was a passionate guy.
He thought a lot too.
Some things could be fixed, but some things got burnt to a crisp and then there was nothing to salvage.
Ugh.
You should have kept your temper more in check. Ah, well. You knew that now, but now was too late and you had no cake left, just a bit of hot tea and a voice message from a guy who wanted to know you.
You know what.
You actually wanted to know him too.
He had a cute smirk.
You neatly cleaned up and tossed the packaging, walking out with the paper cup, going back to your car to listen to that voice message that contained an alarmingly deep voice that surprised you with its sexiness. Well. Well, then.
Time to burn it up, maybe.
-
Shit.
Shit, shit, shit.
Okay. Okay, he had two choices. Let sleeping dogs lie or poke them, which may or may not result in the positive outcome he wanted. It probably wouldn’t, because you were fire and burned everything in your path, and while that could be a good thing, fuck, a very good thing, but this…
This wouldn’t end well for him.
Mostly because Jungkook now realized, after finally speaking to Jimin, that he was wrong in thinking that you were sneaking around and trying to sleep with his best friend, when in actuality you were contacting Jimin repeatedly and being secretive because you were planning a grand event that included all his friends and a big party for your boyfriend’s birthday, but then he beat you to the punch and broke up with you before anything could come to fruition.
So, yeah.
You were probably really pissed at him.
Jungkook wouldn’t be surprised if you wanted to set him on fire.
Ugggggggh, me, you stupid dummy!
He was sitting on his couch and slowly sinking to the floor, mentally berating himself for his pride and his overthinking, because of course Jungkook wouldn’t have thought like this if, as Jimin pointed out, he had some insecurity about her leaving him for someone else – and, unfortunately and infuriatingly, Jimin is damn right, because Jimin was kind and sweet and not nearly half as brash or annoying as Jungkook was.
Or thought he was.
And you could get anyone.
Anyone. With that body, that gaze, that confidence? No one would stand a chance. He hadn’t and he was fine with that, until he went and fucked it up, and now he knew you could go out and do whatever and whoever if you wanted, you just had to want to. And, obviously, you went out and visited your favorite café. Without him. To top it all off, you had smiled at your phone, clearly texting someone.
Shit.
Jungkook slapped his hands to his face and groaned, his ass at the edge of the couch and two centimeters away from collapsing to his abstract black-and-white living room rug that you had picked out when he moved in after he nagged you saying that he was bad at interior design and needed help, but secretly he only wanted to annoy you into making decisions for him.
He should… say something.
It wasn’t going to end well.
Fuck!
He hoped the person you were talking to was not cute. You liked cute more than handsome, he knew. You liked cute faces, deep voices, and diligent, hardworking people who knew who they were and weren’t easily swayed in their beliefs.
Which he was everything he was.
He just had the wrong belief and went way too far into the deep end without putting his pride aside and straight-up asking, thus leading to him being single and, now, angry at himself. For someone who thinks so much, you act too fast, you used to tell him with a laugh, mostly referring to his aggressiveness when playing video games.
Jungkook sadly plopped onto the floor for a good while, thinking about what he had done.
-
You were horny.
But, also, you were trying to change, so you weren’t about to coerce this guy that you were barely getting to know to drop his pants. Although he probably would. You were pretty convincing when you wanted to be and there were some telltale signs signaling that you two had some shared… interests. Yeah. However! You were trying not to go that route for once in your life.
It was pretty difficult.
He had sent you more voice messages. He even sent one he considered embarrassing, where he was singing, which would have been cringe as hell except it turned out to be the complete opposite. The stark contrast of his sweet, angelic singing voice and his deep, sultry speaking voice was shocking. Unreal. Was it possible to fall in love from just that knowledge? No. Was it possible to find your heart racing and imagining indecent things?
Possible?
Yes.
Did that make you a degenerate?
Maybe.
Hence why you simply made a comment about his talent and how impressive it was. You did not, in fact, mention the sudden intense desire to march over to wherever this guy was, rip off his shirt, and run your tongue all over his chest so you could hear the varying tones of the delicious noises that he would surely make as you teased his skin and who-knows-what-else. Mostly what was stopping you was that you hadn’t asked to see him in person yet.
Anyway.
Now you were stuck with the age-old question – jack off or distract yourself?
Or keep talking to the new guy?
No. You couldn’t do that. You were trying to change, and that meant not basing the foundation of a relationship on sex and good conversation. The latter, fine. The former? Apparently got you in trouble, apparently made you a problem, apparently was not good, and you didn’t used to care about that stuff until you lost him.
Stupid love.
You sighed and plopped down on your bed, frowning.
Your phone was laying on your pillow, having a nice nap.
You knew you should probably talk to someone about it. Anyone. But you avoided it, because you didn’t want to put Jeon Jungkook in a bad light to anyone, ex-boyfriend or not. You simply avoided everyone’s questions until they all died out and left you alone. Then you spent countless nights, much like this one, analyzing why you felt the way you felt about that thing that seemed to invade way too much of your life.
Jungkook accusing you of cheating on him.
You used to think, ah, I don’t overthink things, but even if you didn’t actively think about it, you found yourself holding back, not doing things that you would normally do, all because what if someone misinterpreted your intentions? What is there was just something about you that implied such a thought? It would have been easy to brush off if it was some random, but the person that you had thought you would spend the rest of your life with had accused you of lying.
The one thing you hated most, lying.
Which you had been doing at the time, but not about what he thought it was.
Which made it a harder pill to swallow, which made you stubborn, which made you not say anything or bother correcting him with receipts, because fuck him, fuck Jeon Jungkook for accusing you of cheating, fuck him and his, I’m breaking up with you, and you bluntly accepting it and leaving.
Ghosted him.
Didn’t even bother asking for an explanation or reconciliation.
Be the bigger person, yeah, that was what all the self-help books and podcasts said, but honestly you didn’t give a fuck. How the hell were you going to go on, living with the knowledge of Jeon Jungkook accusing you of lying, the one thing you hated most in this world? Who cared what his reason was? Who cared what it all meant? Not you on a bad day.
You winced.
Nothing you could do about that now.
The only way to make things different was to act differently in the same situation. If you were going to see someone new, you couldn’t just seduce them and drive them to the brink of insanity so that they were begging to fuck on the first meeting. You already did that.
With Jungkook.
And we know how that one ended.
So, you were doing the whole meet-a-guy-on-a-dating-app thing, switch to texting – probably too quickly but whatever – and slowly build up to a first meeting.
Slowly.
It had been a week and he was sending voice memos of him singing and maybe you were already shamelessly flirting.
Okay, you were trying and that was the point. Also, he was making it too easy and being too cute with his reactions. Being able to hear the sheepishness in that deep voice, mmm. And he simply couldn’t refuse you when you prompted him to switch to speaking directly instead of text. He did whatever you asked, not questioning it.
Maybe you should call him.
Hm.
Your hand found its way to the pillow where your phone was having a serene siesta.
You wanted to, but there was something that was holding you back. It would be easy to be blind about it, but you had to be honest with yourself before getting to the serious playing around. You didn’t need to bring up a picture of new guy. You knew exactly what he looked like – and that was the problem.
Born in the same year.
Muscular with a cute face.
The same height.
Seriously sexy when absorbed in their interests and adorable as fuck when flustered.
Able to be flustered easily by you, the intoxicating fire.
New guy didn’t have tattoos though. Not any that you could see in his photos, anyway. Mhm, you can sit here and pretend all you want but there are too many similarities to him and Jeon Jungkook, missy. Your brain had a point. Maybe this was what having-a-type meant. Or maybe this screamed rebound, which is exactly what you didn’t want it to be, so you were holding back.
But new guy was so.
Fucking.
Cute.
Pairing the combination of his loveable demeanor with the contrast of how built he was and that was the lethal combination right there. Plus, it was obvious he liked you. It would only take a little push. You flicked your wrist and unlocked your phone with your fingerprint, immediately bringing up the last thing you were doing. His latest text, saying he was off to shower, but promising he would be back after. Your phone normally vibrated to notify you, but this time it didn’t have to.
In real time, the voice memo popped up.
You played it.
That distinct deliciously deep voice shyly murmuring, “I’m back.”
He was only sending it because he knew you liked it. You could tell by his tone. Hear the hope in it. Well, shit, you could have all these dumbass overthinking reasons to not do something risky, or you could answer the hint of anticipation in that bated breath.
Don’t, your brain said.
You ticked your head. The call button was right next to his name.
You pressed it.
“Surprised?” was your greeting.
-
Maybe you weren’t making headway. Maybe it wasn’t that serious. Maybe you were in for-fun mode, out to break hearts to protect yours. Not that Jungkook would know, because he was standing in your favorite place in the world, and you weren’t here to answer his maybes.
He jumped as the intercom buzzed and scratchily announced that the leftover bread from the bakery was being put on flash sale. Most likely because it was going to expire today.
Yes, Jeon Jungkook was standing in the savory snack aisle of your local grocery store. A lot of people preferred the sweeter snacks – that was him, he was a lot of people – but you wanted the salty ones, which meant you and him never had to fight for snacks. He would eat all the candy and you would be chomping on seaweed. Harmony.
Until he fucked it up.
Yes, we get it. You’re an idiot. Move on, me.
But Jungkook couldn’t move on, because he was moping and picking up the last bag of shrimp chips like it was the goddamn Holy Grail and hoping your communications with mystery man were not going well. Well, he didn’t know if it was a man but it would hurt more if it was and his mind was conjuring worst case scenario to terrorize him. Or guilt him. Or both.
He clutched the shrimp chips like they were his lifeline and shuffled out of the aisle.
He didn’t even really like them. Well, he did. He would eat any snack. They just tasted better when they were with you because you loved them and used to talk about how you ate them a lot as a kid. Jungkook used to tease you for not liking candy enough. Were you even a kid? And then you’d put him in a chokehold. A real one, not a metaphorical one – although you had him there too.
He shouldn’t have taught you that. Was a bad idea.
Well, he couldn’t even be regretful about that anymore.
Sigh.
-
Where the fuck were the shrimp chips?
You were staring at the label that indicated they were discounted. Right there, in glaring red ink. They were clearly sold here. You reached back, feeling around for that familiar packaging. You would recognize the ridge of the shrimp chips right away. Nothing but the turtle chips. Fuck! Who the hell bought the shrimp chips? You squinted at the cart of the old lady at the far end of the aisle.
Was it you, lady? Hmm?!
Before you could harass said old lady, she leisurely rolled off to the next aisle.
Fuck.
Not that you would fight the elderly for shrimp chips, but maybe you had put people into a headlock for less.
Not maybe, you had.
Anyway.
Perhaps you shouldn’t have come after dinner. Damnnit. You marched out of the aisle and searched the endcaps, hoping that perhaps there was a spare bag left behind or possibly another display. Nope. Sad times. What else were you craving? You came all the way over to your local grocery store to get a familiar nostalgic snack, only for them to not have it, therefore you must purchase something random so the cashiers didn’t think you’re a weirdo for leaving empty-handed.
Not that they would notice.
Or care.
Hm.
You were about to collect what was left of your shattered expectations and get out of there before you stopped, seeing a colorful display with a poster of a joyful marshmallow standing under a starry sky, beside a tent and a campfire. The stacked boxes under the brightly saturated sign indicated the product contents of chocolate, graham crackers, and marshmallows – a s’mores kit.
Was…
Was the marshmallow going to roast himself as sacrifice?
Or… was the marshmallow going to eat these s’mores?
Before you could debate the ethics of the vaguely cannibalistic nature of this marketing tactic, you remembered Jeon Jungkook’s favorite dessert was s’mores. In fact, he nearly caused a fire on your gas stove in his desire for said sweet treat. There was a lot of yelling and smoke and throwing open the window to your next-door neighbor staring wide-eyed at you as the smoke alarm blared.
You recalled gasping that you burnt the rice and scurrying away.
What? You weren’t going to throw your boyfriend under the bus.
Er.
Ex-boyfriend, now.
You reached out to the box. A fun activity for the family, it said. You didn’t have a family. Just you and some what-ifs. You held the box, feeling the weight. It was substantial, but not that heavy. Get it together. What were you going to do? Freak out every time you thought about Jungkook? Come on. He doesn’t deserve that. The best thing you could do was have a good opinion of him, despite him being a little shit.
Hey.
You meant that in an endearing way.
… Yeah.
You sighed and tucked the s’mores kit under your arm. This was how life was. People were too complicated to fit in neat little boxes and situations were too convoluted to have a correct or right resolution. You would probably feel even shittier if you tried to act on emotions and get into his face about it. You had to take the L. Eat the damn s’mores and maybe think about finally meeting the new guy. The conversation had been nice and fluid once you got him talking about himself, something he had been reluctant to do because he didn’t want to seem arrogant.
You had asked him if he was.
He had replied with, “Maybe a little?” The self-doubt in his response had made you laugh, as if he wasn’t so sure himself. But the whole point becoming someone’s potential one and only was bragging about yourself, so might as well lay out everything you got, right?
You didn’t even like sweets.
Maybe the new guy did, though. Maybe you should try to like them a little more.
You bought the box of s’mores and went home.
-
Normally, people cried into wine or chocolate, but Jungkook was crying into a bag of shrimp chips.
Okay.
Not actually crying, because then he would ruin the shrimp chips, but pretty damn close to sobbing into the crispy snack while watching the latest popular drama and wondering what you were doing. Hopefully you were happy, doing stuff you loved. Cute stuff, like watching cat videos or those home renovation shows you seemed to have great interest in. You told him you wanted to learn about houses so that you would have knowledge when buying one with him. Smart. So smart. Oh, man, why were you so smart and why was he a dum-dum? That’s not fair, Jungkook. You’ll handle all the interior design stuff because you’re artsy, oh, wait, I’ll have to narrow down the options so you don’t buy seven different diffusers. He chomped away at the shrimp chips, sniffling at the memory.
He was being lame.
Also, a little self-centered, because this was not all about him. You had been in the relationship too and technically you were the one who was hurt. He should not be the sad one sitting here on the floor in front of his television and stuffing his face with shrimp chips as he watched the male lead and the female lead go through some misunderstandings. He should be thinking about how he could be a better person.
Jungkook frowned.
Were shrimp chips gluten-free?
He checked the label.
Yes. Whew. His doctor had warned him he shouldn’t have gluten late at night, as it would upset his stomach. Step one into being a better person, take care of one’s personal health. At least he was doing that right.
Right-ish.
Back to chomping away.
Maybe you were happier without him. That would suck, but at least you would be doing well. What more could he ask for? Besides rewinding time and boinking some sense into his own head. Something to ask Doctor Strange once they would inevitably meet. It would be awkward to ask for a favor right away, but what’s the worst that could happen? Utter chaos of the timeline and disruption of subsequent timelines connecting the various multiverses?
… On second thought.
Jungkook wondered if the female lead would just tell the male lead that she already liked him. You wouldn’t have a problem saying something like that right away. It was very cool of you, always being the first to admit how you felt. Never hiding anything.
It was at that moment that Jungkook choked on a shrimp chip and starting hacking up his lungs.
He had to punch his chest to gain some semblance of breath back. There was a lot of wheezing and scrambling for the water bottle on his coffee table. Ugh. His throat felt all fucked up.
Hmmmm.
Did you throat feel like this when he rammed his dick into it? He never asked. He had been too busy feeling good and ascending to the heavens to ask questions. He should have been more thoughtful on that front. Maybe if he had been more considerate…
You had a vibe going on here, me, and you just ruined it by thinking about sex.
Oops.
Anyway.
Back to watching drama and crying over shrimp chips despite one of them trying to end his life.
-
You opened the box of the s’mores kit and the graham crackers were all crushed.
“Fuck.”
You could roast marshmallows and top it with melted chocolate and graham cracker powder?
You struggled and made do, realizing with a quick taste test that, yes, this was too sweet, but you had tea and resilience, and your never-say-die attitude reminded you that you could do anything, including making a very messy but possibly innovative dessert. If you added some yogurt, would it become a s’mores parfait? Hey. That could be a thing… somewhere.
Well, it was a thing here in your kitchen right now.
At least you didn’t start a fire.
-
“Maybe you should do something.”
He stared off into space and answered hollowly.
“Like what?”
“I don’t know,” Park Jimin dragged out exaggeratedly. “Talk to her? Maybe your ship has sailed, but at least you could get some closure. For my sake.” He muttered the last bit under his breath.
Jungkook did not want to hear that his ship has sailed. He wanted to hear that the ship was right here, docking to the port. Or… something like that. Whatever. Anyway, Jimin was doing a shit job of helping him figure out how to repair the gaping wound in his chest. Talk to her, yeah, like that was gonna solve anything.
Psh.
Jungkook pushed the food around on his plate. A surefire sign he was feeling like shit. He always ate. Few things could stop him from eating.
“Are you dying? Why are you disrespecting your dak-galbi like that?”
On second thought, Jungkook shoveled it into his mouth. Food comas were a thing, right? Maybe he could eat himself into a stupor. Maybe he could induce an actual coma if he consumed enough alcohol and food.
Only one way to find out.
“Oi, don’t eat that fast, are you trying to give yourself a stomachache? Oi. Jungkook!”
-
You woke up.
Heart racing, world swirling, touching your face, and there they were, tears, uninhibited by logic anymore, blurry faces and that kind of anger that was more sad than angry, but fury won, because you didn’t want to show that you were sad, burying it deep inside until your dreams broke through your subconscious and replayed it for you, the yelling, the throwing of cushions, the snatching of the keys and the furious tossing of your shoes on and then running, running, you shouldn’t have ran but you did, you ran and ran and ran and cried into the wind just like how you cried into your pillow right now and for what, for nothing, for something that was over and dead, over and dead.
It was fading.
Fading.
The memory, and now your tears, curling into your pillow, suffocating yourself in cloth, trying to close it out, breathing nothing and seeing black, in, out, in, out, until your lungs felt like they were burning.
You threw your head up, gasping.
Face dry.
Not a chance that someone would catch you crying over Jeon Jungkook.
Not that anyone was here except you.
You were still someone though.
Breathe in.
Breathe out.
How could he think I was lying when I hate lying most in this world?
And no one could see you cry, no one could see you fall apart, no one could think that they had any power over you, because you weren’t weak, you couldn’t be made a fool of, you would rather tear it apart yourself then let someone else think that they could get to you.
You ruined everything, me.
And maybe you did.
Maybe you did and now what? Nothing. Nothing but bad dreams and an empty bed and shuddering breaths as you wiped your eyes with the duvet and pretended your nose wasn’t stuffy, sliding back down to the silence, breathing quietly, he used to be right here and now there was no one but you, but you were someone and not a chance that someone would see you crying over Jeon Jungkook.
You were someone.
And there was nothing anyone could do about this aftermath, nothing to do about you yelling irreversible things and him yelling irreversible things, both of you tearing apart what you built together like it was nothing, over what?
Pride.
Fear.
The usual suspects.
There was no point in asking why no one fought for anyone because everyone was wearing masks of mad and secretly sad. Yeah, you could die on this sacred ground. You could. That would be real fuckin’ easy. But easy wasn’t living. You didn’t pick easy when you picked Jungkook, and you didn’t pick easy when you walked away either.
This limbo wasn’t you.
You sighed.
Breathed out.
Held your breath for thirty seconds.
Easy isn’t living, me. Just go on a damn date.
-
You are a dumbass, me.
He was too full and too drunk and a blob on his own bed. Jimin tried to convince him that he needed someone to take care of him, but Jungkook just pushed his hyung out the door and bade him good night. Jimin kept urging him to talk about it, but Jungkook was, he was talking to his head every second of every day and it wasn’t doing anything but giving him a headache, and now he had a fat headache and a bursting-at-the-seams tummy.
Oof.
So now he was a blob.
Hopefully he wouldn’t throw up.
He felt around and found the water bottle by his bed. Okay. At least he had water. There was a packet of hangover meds in his nightstand drawer. For emergencies like this. Jimin had reminded him that he couldn’t keep doing this to himself, but joke’s on Jimin, Jungkook knew he could. Had been and quite frankly was thinking about sulking to his heart’s content, maybe even until the end of time, because everyone was telling him he couldn’t, so stubbornly he continued.
Out of principle.
Something like that.
Okay, maybe Jungkook was secretly seriously considering gathering his courage to speak to you face-to-face. Maybe. It was all his fault, after all. For not believing, for making up a narrative that tore you and him apart, all his fault for burning that bridge you two built together, and for what, for nothing but pride and fear and wasn’t he getting a little old for that?
Jungkook sighed, feeling far too sober and reasonable.
Should have drunk more.
Maybe you didn’t need the closure, but he wouldn’t know unless he asked, and he was done assuming, done thinking he knew what was what. It was clear that he didn’t. He didn’t even know if he needed closure, but the aftermath still stung even now, scorched by the everlasting fire, and maybe he was stupid for thinking some silly little words could do anything for this situation, but it was something, right, and something was better than this nothing, nothing but a bad signal flickering weakly, couldn’t connect because there were too many walls separating you and him.
Jungkook knew exactly where your apartment was, and could confirm that there were probably many walls separating you and him right now.
If you were in your apartment, that is.
You had to be. It was the middle of the night.
He should be asleep.
Jungkook resumed his blob form and waited for his dreams to take him.
Or nightmares.
That was not a choice he could make, unfortunately.
-
First dates were difficult because you had to chose the one outfit that would represent you. In the off chance that you only ended up meeting this person once, you felt that your clothes had to give off a distinct impression of who you were. Similar to that age-old question of, if you were a ghost and stuck with one outfit forever, what would you want to wear?
Morbid, but effective.
Something you could live by.
Oh, yeah, me, also perhaps you should try to impress the new guy.
You didn’t want to admit it but the truth was the truth – this was less about him and more about you and taking responsibility for whatever came, good or bad. Because, yes, maybe it wouldn’t turn out well, maybe nothing was meant to be, maybe you were driving in the metaphorical fast lane and accelerating way too recklessly, but it wasn’t like you to let up on the gas, and the only way to found out if there was any chance at all was to put on some damn clothes and just do the damn thing.
That how you were before…
No. You were someone before him and you’re someone now.
It wasn’t fair.
But life wasn’t fair, life was complicated and maybe even a little immoral sometimes, and that was how it was so you got dressed. White cropped t-shirt. You look so good in those, even if they’re simple. Big black hoodie with a cheeky-looking ghost in the back, peeking up with a mischievous little smile. I love oversized stuff on you. It makes you look so small and cute. Short black skirt, pleated, with a chain hanging off the hip. You hooked on a little keychain of a tuxedo cat to the top of the chain, something for you to know and maybe for others to find out if you took off your hoodie. I’m glad you like wearing short skirts. You have great legs and I love looking at them. Thick thigh-high black socks to block out the cold. Aw, man, sucks that it’s getting cold now but you have to protect those precious legs. You would wear your heeled boots with the big silver buckles shaped like moons. Thick soled and heavy, ah, like mine.
You looked at yourself in the mirror.
Your fashion is nice because you always match me.
You could hear Jungkook’s voice even though he wasn’t there and you just had to stand there and accept that life wasn’t fair and that you would hear it for a while until you forgot the sound of his voice and it wasn’t fair that you still couldn’t decide if you actually wanted to forget it or not.
But nothing changed if you only stood still, so you walked over to your front door and put your shoes on. Checked your black bag with a frowning smiley face icon printed on the front and slung it over your shoulder, safely tucking it by your hip.
Paused.
Glanced at the hooks by your door and picked up the thick maroon-colored scarf, lopping it around your neck as you opened the door and walked out, holding your keys in your hand.
-
Who the fuck is that?
Now.
Now, Jungkook was fully and completely aware what he was doing was wrong, even if his original intent was perfectly sensible. Completely normal. Nothing wrong with what he had initially meant to do but shit got sidetracked the second he spotted familiar legs and a black hoodie, with a cheeky ghost printed onto the back, that’s the one, and was that a man walking next to you, dark-haired and handsome, kind of close, turning his head and laughing at something you said, something Jungkook couldn’t hear because he was a block away, staring wide-eyed with his legs moving of their own accord.
Wondering what this guy had that Jungkook didn’t have.
That white sweater didn’t do much to hide the broad shoulders and muscular frame. Clean blue jeans and a very nice smile, eyes that crinkled up when he laughed, covering his mouth. It wasn’t fake. Jungkook had hoped it was a fake laugh but it looked genuine as fuck and now Jungkook was stalking his ex-girlfriend on his way to her apartment to have that talk that Jimin kept telling him to have, the talk to get out all these pent-up feelings, but now he should just turn around and try another day.
But life wasn’t fair.
He wanted to say he was simply too dumbstruck to stop himself, but Jungkook was pretty sure it was sinful jealousy that was giving his legs the strength to follow at a block’s distance.
He wanted to tell himself something comforting, like she has terrible taste but the guy was pretty good-looking actually, or he doesn’t seem that interesting but you seemed very invested in what he had to say at the intersection, so interested that you two missed the crossing signal, or he can’t make you laugh but you did, you laughed and he laughed at the missed signal and it looked like a scene of out a movie, two adults holding insulated cups of some warm drink and shyly smiling over light sips in between conversation.
And the creepy ex-boyfriend squinting at the scene from a block away.
Yup, that’s me. You’re probably wondering how I got here.
You started crossing and Jungkook jogged to catch the light just before it changed.
This was really stupid all around, but he didn’t care. He wanted to know if this new guy knew your affinity for green tea and lemon cake yet. He wanted to know if new guy liked your oversized hoodie and skirt, because it was one of his favorite outfit combinations on you. He wanted to know how you felt about new guy, because new guy looked like he had an impressive personal best at the bench press, and Jungkook wanted to know if it was better than his, not that it mattered.
But it mattered.
Jungkook avoided the streetlamps that suddenly turned on, trying to stay out of the light. He didn’t know how recognizable he was in his massive black parka and black jeans with rips at the knees, but he wasn’t chancing you suddenly turning around and recognizing his knees.
He made sure his face mask was on securely before pulling the hood over his head.
New guy put his hand on your head and Jungkook almost skidded to a stop as a different hand fluffed your hair.
You playfully swiped at new guy’s hand and now Jungkook was close enough to hear that deep laugh at your reaction.
You used to take Jungkook’s hand and put it on your head and when he asked what you were doing, you simply told him that you liked the reassuring weight.
How did I not get it?
Jungkook watched as both you and new guy stopped, realizing you were holding his wrist.
In slow motion, you reluctantly let go and dipped your head, apologizing.
New guy waved his hand, apologizing himself, bowing even.
Night was falling, falling.
You beckoned, indicating that the walk should continue.
Jungkook followed and watched you talk to this man in front of your apartment complex. He tried to sort out the feeling, because there was a part of him that hadn’t given up yet, and another part that saw that life wasn’t fair, and the last part him thought maybe this right in front of him was meant to be and maybe his part of your fairytale was over.
The man leaned over and deliberately kissed you on the cheek, politely not going for the lip kiss.
He waved and stepped back, back in the opposite direction, but Jungkook was on the other side of the street now, circling, coming from the other way as he watched new guy wave to you and you wave back, yelling at him to be careful and watch where he was going.
“Kim Gunhak! You’ll trip if you don’t turn around!”
And this Kim Gunhak almost did, catching himself and looking sheepish, giving you one last smile before turning around.
You waited until he was too far away to make out and then headed into your apartment complex.
Jungkook fought with himself, unsure what to do now, wondering what was right.
-
You had only just taken off your shoes when your doorbell buzzed.
The intercom was in the hallway, but you were right next to the door, so, instead of checking it, you opened it, expecting a confused delivery person who was looking for your next-door neighbor around the corner or a neighbor inquiring about a lost dog or maybe even some drunkard who had the wrong apartment, literally anyone but the person who was standing at the entrance of your front door.
Jeon Jungkook.
He looked very sober.
His cheeks were pink from the cool night.
You thought you would have something to say, something vengeful and witty and spirited with fire, but your eyes connected with those big brown ones and suddenly you were staring at him and he was staring at you, frozen, couldn’t speak, afraid to jinx it, feeling like something otherworldly was happening right now, impossible that Jeon Jungkook was right there, someone you had known so well not that long ago, but now his eyes were flying saucers from another planet.
Unrecognizable, the feeling in those eyes.
You remembered crying and that hurt.
But easy wasn’t living.
Sometimes living meant you got hurt.
You remembered every detail on his face, from his dark eyebrows to his black hair, longer now, to those expressive dark brown orbs, to the shape of his pink lips accented with a silver ring, to the mole underneath them. Little details that you loved about him. You remembered you should be mad at him. You felt like maybe you should be.
But, like ashes, there was nothing but smokey remnants after enough time passed.
Jungkook spoke first.
“I’m… sorry.”
It was cold and you should close the door, but you were stuck, transfixed by his words.
“I know you hate those words, because actions mean more than I’m sorry but…” He sucked in a shaky breath and helplessness looked right at you. “I thought of a thousand actions and none of them can take back what I thought was true, because in that moment I betrayed you, the moment when I left myself believe in something that I made up in my mind more than I believed in you.”
He looked like he was going to cry and you hated it when Jungkook cried because then you felt like crying, like you had made him cry even if it wasn’t directly about you, but this was about you.
“When I realized I could be wrong, I didn’t want to admit it.”
Pride.
“By then I said some shitty things and you were already out the door.”
Fear.
“You said I was too stubborn and headstrong for anybody, even you,” you breathed, every memory scored pain, burned into your brain.
Jungkook shook his head. He didn’t try to come closer even though you could tell he wanted to. He didn’t cry even though you could tell he wanted to. He didn’t stop his lip from trembling because he wanted you to see that he was honest, that he didn’t want to hide even though past him would want to.
“I’m sorry. You always told me to be aware of my initial reaction so I could sort through the other options and react less emotionally, but I failed you, and I failed us, and I know I shouldn’t say this, but I wish I could take it all back, the first thought about you and Jimin, and everything after, because if I just said that very first thought out loud instead of holding it in, I wouldn’t be watching you live life without me.”
Your thoughts whispered to you, cruel and unfaithful poison seeping.
It's my fault.
Maybe it was. Maybe it wasn’t. Maybe Jungkook was being unfair to apply what you said to this situation and maybe he wasn’t. It was hard to tell and hard to know the answer. The funny thing about life was that there was usually no answer. There was only shit that happened and acting on too little information too much of the time. Maybe it would be apt to feel anger now, because Jungkook gave you the obscure hint that he had seen Kim Gunhak walk you home, perhaps just the kiss on the cheek goodbye part but it was spying all the same, and yet, instead of anger, you felt something else.
Relieved.
“You saw my date drop me off?” you asked quietly.
Jungkook looked away, ashamed.
“Yeah.”
Now.
Now you saw it was pointless.
Your fault. His fault. Who cared whose fault was it? You could spend all day and all night and all the time thereafter trying to decide whose fault it was, but at the end of the day the earth beneath you and him was scorched by an imperfect love, and it was fine to walk away. It was fine to tell him that he could walk away too, fine to walk away from the ashes of this fairytale.
You can walk away from our fairytale, Jungkook, me.
He raised his head, making eye contact with you again, taking a deep breath.
You gazed back.
Saw flecks of what could have been, lights still alive in those big brown eyes.
Pride.
Fear.
Not a chance that someone would catch you crying over Jeon Jungkook.
“I…”
The usual suspects holding you back.
“I… told myself I could do anything,” you said, not breaking eye contact and you saw he believed that you could; he always did. “I only had to put the effort in. Meet people and open up a little. Even if it was fake it ‘til I make it, and I almost made it.”
The world was blurry and cold, all around.
“Almost.”
Not a chance.
“I almost did, Jeon Jungkook, but then you had to go and apologize.”
The tears came down, and Jungkook instinctively reached out to wipe them away, but then he stopped, suddenly afraid. You stepped back and wiped your cheeks yourself, surprised at that suddenness. Was this what getting older and growing up meant? Allowing yourself to be in touch with your emotions?
Mortifying.
You stared at him, almost accusingly, and it was all falling apart.
“I’m tired of trying to figure out who was wrong.”
Everything was all wrong.
“I’m tired of trying to rethink every little thing, all thanks to you.”
Painstakingly re-wiring every thought so all those little things didn’t remind you of Jungkook, giving in sometimes to the memories and feeling aghast that both of you had dropped the lit match onto the bridge you built together, burning it, burning it all down.
“I’m tired of missing you.”
You didn’t want to be that one, but you grabbed him by the front of his parka and shook him hard, out of frustration and that thought that no one should catch you crying over a boy, of all things, a silly boy who had made you laugh and loved sweets and your fashion and had always eagerly listened to you talk about whatever with stars in his eyes like you his everything, and so you refused to cry in front of him so you could always look cool and tough and not affected, but now you shoved your head into his chest and cried, cried about how you couldn’t be the person he thought you were, a person worthy of his love, because the truth was deep down you were weak, deep down you were made a fool of, and deep down Jungkook did have power over you since some part of you stupidly hadn’t given up yet. If you had been worthy, why would he have any reason to question your faithfulness? You must have done something wrong. The unknown had eaten away at you all this time, prevented you from crying and prevented you from trying to reconcile, and here Jungkook was beating you to it, so the least you could do was be honest and cry.
It was the worst, letting yourself cry.
He wrapped his arms around your shoulders, holding you to him.
You pushed him away, glaring, fiercely rubbing at your eyes with the bottom of your sleeves.
“Don’t lie to me.”
Shook your head, stumbling back into your apartment, swinging at the door and missing, your red scarf falling from your neck, falling, falling, warmth slipping away.
“Don’t try to make me feel better when all you came here to do was to heal yourself.”
“I didn’t come here to heal myself.”
Jungkook bit his lip, looking guilty, following you inside, but only a step.
“I came here to try and get you back. I was going to fight that guy with my bare hands.”
Your tears paused, blinking hard to clear your vision.
“What?”
His eyes shifted and he sucked on the inside of his cheek, frowning slightly. “Well, if this was a movie, I would fight him, but it’s not, because it’s unlikely you would take me back after I beat up some poor guy.”
“I would kick your ass,” you snapped, annoyance clearing the sadness. “Not to mention Gunhak is a workout maniac, as much or more than you. He wouldn’t be beaten by you so easily.”
Jungkook pouted.
You froze.
The moment hung in the air, a stillness with too much meaning.
“Well, I would already lose anyway,” he mumbled, glancing at you. “You were always my weakness.”
Those big brown eyes and you noticed his ears were red, his cheeks were flushed and even his fingers were scarlet. This moment was a choice, a moment to stop and consider the options, but all you did was follow your instinct, reaching forward and grabbing his wrist, pulling him to you, ignoring his wide eyes and confused squeak, pulling and closing the door, cutting off the cold, and now it was just you and him, you holding his cold hands and rubbing, closing your fingers around them, not knowing if this was a bad decision or not, probably, but what made a decision good or bad?
No answers.
“I hate you,” you muttered. “You watch too much drama and memorized all the good lines.”
Your gaze flickered to him and Jungkook pulled a face, looking remorseful again, except this time he seemed less sure of his guilt.
“Sorry?”
You bit your lip.
“You’re stubborn and headstrong too, Jungkook.”
He nodded, not denying it.
“But you’re my good influence,” he chirped lightly.
Then he winced.
“Were. Were my good influence.”
Corrected himself, tone pained.
Heart racing, looking at your world, holding onto Jungkook’s hands, and he stepped closer tentatively, warmth and memories, and the line of having a possibly uncomfortable conversation tomorrow was not crossed yet, not yet, and you squeezed his hands, those big brown eyes asking you if the impossible was possible, and you didn’t dare open your mouth, because the real answer was that you didn’t know, he didn’t know, no one knew, nothing was meant to be, everything was impossible until someone made it possible, and maybe that those someones could be you and him.
You tilted your head.
Familiar breath.
“You can tell me if you like him more than me,” Jungkook whispered shakily. “I’ll probably cry, but I’ll understand eventually.”
The tips of his hair touched your forehead.
“Can you shut up, Jungkook?” you hissed back. “Just shut up and close your eyes if you want me to kiss you.”
Flecks of what could have been, lights still alive in those flying saucers, and his lashes lowered, casting darkness over the stars in those big brown eyes, closing them.
What are you doing, me?
You kissed him.
-
He should have accepted what was, was, but Jungkook couldn’t and now you kissed him and his brain reminded him that you could be the one to break his heart this time, but Jungkook told his brain, I don’t care, and kissed back, trying not to cry all over your face. If this was your revenge arc, Jungkook would gladly be part of it. He had kinda been a shithead. He could understand the audience perspective.
Also, you were kinda hot in your revenge arc.
What?
Jungkook had told you many times before that he loved your legs.
You let go of his hands and placed your palms on his cheeks, exhaling into his mouth, and he never said it before, but he loved that shit, it got him inappropriately hard inappropriately fast, something about the heat and the calmness of your sweet breath that drove him crazy.
He did love sweets, after all.
“You’re so cold.”
Your kiss on his cheeks, his gasping mouth, grazing his lip ring. Soft, plush, perfect lips murmuring against his skin, familiar and sensual and comforting, and he was seconds away from crying, so instead he drew in a shuddering breath, falling into the more R-rated thoughts because if he didn’t let arousal take over, he was seconds away from becoming a motionless, emotional puddle on your hardwood floor and that wasn’t how he wanted this to end.
Yes, Jungkook was relying on sex to keep himself mentally stable.
Sorry, you’re too sexy and I want you too much.
“It’s cold outside,” and his reply came out a little more childish than he intended, too breathy and shivery, it was just so nice, so fucking nice that you were kissing him again, tracing his ears with your fingertips, loving caress, pulling him closer.
Your smile against his lip ring from his silly response.
“I’m warm. Touch me,” you breathed against his chin, hot and heavy.
Okay, maybe Jungkook knew all nice lines in dramas, but you knew all the lines to the porn videos.
Not that he was complaining.
His hands finding your waist and your teeth sinking his lower lip and he whined, the sting of pain coursing through him, a sharp detail of reality proving that this was no dream. His fingers curling into the thick fabric of your hoodie, grasping for your body, warm and getting warmer, yanking you closer. Your tongue tracing his skin, your hands framing the sides of his neck, stripped honesty vibrating in the millimeters of air between your faces.
“I always liked the sounds you make,” you purred, wisps of breath from your formation of words dancing between his trembling lips. “Like you’re desperate for me.”
“I am,” he found himself admitting. “I always am, please, breathe in my mouth, please.”
A ripple of surprise, but you wasted no time, covering his lips with yours and sighing into his throat, making his eyelids flutter and his whole body shiver, and if this was the last time then Jungkook was just going to leave it all on the table, all the things that made him feel good, he wanted them, all the things he remembered you liked, he would do them, like letting go of your hoodie and sliding his hands into your hair, turning your head to kiss your ear and suck on the space right under it, tongue and lips and teeth, your hitched breath at his touch, he missed it, the soft scent of your hair products filling his nose, he missed it, he missed the taste of your skin and the way you impatiently yanked his clothes off, cleanly unzipping his parka and pushing it off his shoulders, forcing him to let go up your head and just dump it on the ground, kicking off his shoes to a different directions, persistently keeping his lips on your neck and letting the fervor take over, insistently pushing you deeper inside your apartment.
He missed it, the way you enjoyed him.
“Can you–”
But you didn’t complete your irritated request, abruptly shoving him into the wall and making him gasp, and then the next thing he knew he was pressing his head to the wall and moaning as you bit down above his collarbone, running your tongue along that sensitive skin, your nails dragging down the sides of his neck, leaving lines of wanton fire.
“Too many layers,” you growled, tugging at the collar of his long-sleeved gray shirt even though it was the only layer separating you and him, but you were right, he agreed that it was too many layers, and Jungkook hastily yanked it up and over his head, tossing it to the side and then you bent down, your hands splayed over his right shoulder and the left side of his hip.
Pink tongue sliding out.
Licking up his chest.
Watching him as you did it, causing blood and pleasure to rush to all the right places.
He moaned, loud and pornographic.
You cocked an eyebrow.
He reached out and pulled at your hoodie and you made it crumple to the floor, then body to body again, face to face, kiss to hungry kiss, his hands going up your white crop top and under your bra, whining deep in his chest as you exhaled into his mouth again, thrusting your tongue into his lips when his fingertips brushed your nipples.
You backed off a little, taking your tongue away.
“D-Don’t stop.”
You paused, searching his eyes.
He hadn’t really confessed it before.
“It’s hot,” Jungkook panted. “When you do stuff like t-that.”
He squeezed your breasts to help get his point access but also for comfort as you scrutinized him, uncertain if he was sincere or not. Fair enough.
“Like what?” you asked, prompting him to clarify.
Heart racing, hot all over, adrenaline and fear fueling his pleasure, because there was something wonderfully dangerous about this territory. He had some inkling, but before he didn’t really bother to ask too much. You always did what you wanted to and naturally it leant to a certain power dynamic, but you never asked to take it further than sporadic, fleeting moments. And, well, Jungkook had never thought about how it would feel to admit out loud that that part of you it turned him on.
It would feel embarrassing, and yet he was enticed by that rush.
Aroused by it.
“When you treat me like you own me.”
Your eyes on his, not breaking the gaze.
Reaching up, running your fingers though his hair, sending tingles down his spine.
“Do you want me to own you a little?” you murmured.
He reached up and closed your fingers around a fistful of his hair.
“Maybe a little more than a little.”
You tugged.
The sting of pain, moan tumbling from his mouth, his hand falling, circling your waist.
Closer.
“I can take more,” he whispered to your lips.
You pulled and closed your hand over his erection fighting his jeans and Jungkook felt his whole body electrify, bucking his hips to your fingers and seeking your lips, but there was no kiss, only a controlled stream of breath to swallow, and the groan bubbled up in his ribcage. Alive. Raw pleasure. Intoxicated, driven by ferocious need, his fumbling hands undoing the button of his jeans, forcing down the zipper, everything being pushed down, and then it was your hand to his hot, taut skin, flicking your wrist by his head to deliver a shot of pain and a stroke of pleasure from the other, torn between the two sensations and the lightheaded feeling of your forceful breath pushing the air out of his lungs, forgetting that he could breathe from his nose, didn’t want to anyway, living was only living when it was on this hazy thin oxygen from your exhale.
Yes, Jungkook was pants down, shirtless, letting you jack him off and pull on his hair as you breathed into his mouth.
That was not how he thought this conversation would end but he was not taking any second of it for granted, rubbing your nipples, kneading your breasts, making sure you felt pleasure too, but the thing that seemed to make you smile most was the sounds he made, so Jungkook upped the desperation level in his tone and tucked his hips back slightly, changing the angle of your stroke.
“Fuck, yes, lower, closer to the head, fuuuuck, right there, a-ah…”
And you knew it all, the right pressure, the steady build up from slow to fast, until you had to focus and simply clutched his head, digging your nails into his scalp, panting against his shaking lips, fast and intense pressure consuming him, chasing the glorious high, closer and closer and closer.
He pinched your hard nipples and rubbed the tips, moaning unashamedly and probably too loud, keeping his lower body rigid so you could control the pace, your name tumbling out of his mouth, deep, needy, looking down to watch your hand firmly wrapped around his stiff cock, the head dark red and pleasure throbbing up his torso, you’re so good, fuck, you’re so fucking good, your breasts in his hands, perfect, groan pitching to helpless whine, almost…
You stopped.
“Fuck!”
His entire body jerked as you squeezed and simply froze at the very last second, at literally the singular point of almost no return and you stopped, and he was too far gone to be ashamed of the pathetic whimpering he was doing now, gripping your hand around his twitching length and nonsensically begging you to continue, but the moment was gone and, by the look of your devious smirk, it was all on purpose.
Fuck!
In his horny-induced haze, Jungkook attempted his best puppy eyes.
Your hand slid down his head and traced his jaw.
“I’m not gonna let you cum on the floor,” you teased.
He pulled a pout. “Come on… It’s not like floors can’t be cleaned.”
Your grip pulsed around his cock so hard he nearly gasped in pain.
“You’re not going to last if you cum once before pussy.”
Okay.
You were right, but the truth didn’t make Jungkook happy.
Not until he was balls deep into you, condom wrapper falling from his hand, you taking the moment to stretch your legs over his torso casually, adjusting your hips under him, and then he was deeper, surrounded on all sides by silky wet warmth that pulsated around him, so good his head involuntarily tipped back, his hair trickling his shoulders as he slid out a little and then back in.
Oh.
God.
He was very happy now.
“F-Fuck… I hate this position… you f-feel too fucking g-good…”
“It’s just missionary.”
He jerked his head down to see you smirking at him. Looking smug fully naked, juicy thighs flush to his abs and your body was essentially folded in half as he leaned down, sucking in a breath as your pussy clamped around his length, slow and controlled and every centimeter gripped tight like his dick owned money.
“You have the most control in this position,” he puffed.
“You wanted it,” you hummed.
Jungkook squinted in mock suspicion. Then he gave up on the act rather quickly.
“Yeah, I want you.”
Slid out and back in, shuddering.
“I don’t want anyone else but you.” Pleasure snaking through him with every thrust, breathless, slow and deep at first, but gradually adding power, harder and rougher, smacking hips to crotch, erotic electricity all over, his hair falling over his eyes, looking down, staring into yours. “I know I’m balls deep right now, but you have to believe me.”
You reached up.
And.
Patted him on the cheek.
“Jungkook, we can have the deep talk after the two minutes it takes for you to finish. I promise,” you assured cheerfully with a smile.
Hey!
He scrunched up his face and glared at you. “Excuse me, I last longer than two minutes–”
You planted your hands onto the mattress and thrust up into him. He choked at the sudden slingshot of ecstasy that pierced through him and his entire tirade about how he was going to last way longer because you technically edged him which was very mean by the way, yeah, all that was instantly forgotten as you tightened your jaw and all around him, creating an insane pace that his body immediately followed, too much carnal instinct and not enough sanity, the sound between you and him suddenly louder, wetter, rhythmic smacks and panting gasps, your mouth opening and your pink tongue licking the air, hint of a smirk at the periphery of your lips, and Jungkook felt like he should be mad about that, but it was turning him on more, fuck, he felt his cock twitch as he watched that agile tongue writhe, teasing sin, he was doomed, he was one of those freaky people that was into this stuff now.
That was what he got for admitting the truth.
Your hand shot up and you tangled your fingers in his long hair, gripping his head to get the leverage to fully fuck him from below plus add the aching pain of your nails digging into the scalp to the torrent of sensations ransacking him right now.
He groaned and his eyes rolled back, the orgasm slamming into him.
All over him, shooting out all over his nerves, potent pleasure so powerful that his hips bucked and shivered, only pure will allowing him to continue thrusting, but it appeared you had been holding back, oh fuck, skyrocketing his shivering orgasm to uncontrollable crashing waves from every throb of your walls, the slickness between your bodies painting onto his inner thighs and crotch, your name torn from his throat, low and hoarse and raw, drowning in the most concentrated bliss he knew, drenched in sex and sweat, wishing it was forever.
It always ended too soon.
Fuck.
-
“Um.”
You sat in front of him, wrapped in blankets as he was wrapped in his own cocoon of blankets, watching his lips twist and shift, looking uneasy.
“I’m super serious,” Jungkook finally settled. “About starting over. I mean, I know we just…”
“Fucked like a bad porn storyline?” you offered.
He winced, shifting his eyes. "Er. Yeah."
You dropped the jokes. “I’m serious too. Let’s start again. I learned my lesson. No more surprises.” You sharply poked his knee through the blanket. “But you have to talk to me. Whatever it is. Even if you think I don’t wanna know. Uncomfortable or not, better sooner than later. And I will do the same.” You nodded, more yourself than him, promising to hold yourself to it. Kept your gaze on him so he knew you were serious about doing so. You took it all in, messy black hair, big brown eyes, dreams of what could be. You and him could make the impossible, possible.
You and him only had to put the effort in.
“I wanna know everything about you, Jungkook.”
There was real worry reflected back at you. “What if it’s not good?”
You shrugged. “I already knew you weren’t good. I went on one date with one guy and you were already stalking me.”
His brows furrowed in indignation. “Hey, I happened to stumble onto your date by chance!”
“Oh, yeah, and by chance you followed us all the way to my apartment?” you countered.
His jaw flapped. “W… W-Well…”
You raised your eyebrows. Both of them.
Very high.
He puffed one cheek and looked away. “I just… hadn’t decided what to do…” he mumbled. “Or how serious you were, because if you were super serious, I wasn’t going to talk to you…”
You blinked in fake disbelief.
Jungkook muttered something like, I meant I wasn’t gonna try to sleep with you or anything if you were dating another guy... Mmm. You poked him. He shifted his eyes. Then ticked his chin at you.
“What about you, huh? You did it too.”
You shrugged. “Yeah, I did. I didn’t start dating you only because you’re cute, you know.”
He blinked in confusion.
You shrugged. “Fucking is important to me in a relationship. You always wanna fuck me. That’s what I want. Especially now that you admitted that you want me to own your ass in bed, making you even more appealing. Mmm. We have to explore that more.” You nodded sagely, greatly satisfied with your decision. “Therefore, I will talk to Gunhak in the morning.”
Jungkook sputtered, cocooning himself further into the thick blankets, slowly turning red. “That’s… W-Well… I wouldn’t date you unless I thought that you were the hottest woman that’s ever existed...”
You cupped your hand around your ear. “Pardon? Jeon Jungkook, are you saying that you’re shallow?”
“I’m not shallow, don’t twist my words!”
“I can twist something else–”
“Stop, t-that’s scary, don’t come under here! Hey!”
--
masterpost
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aajjks · 2 months ago
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Crush (JJK)
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synopsis. He hated you, crushingly.
pairing: secret soft yandere simp!jungkook x barista!reader. ft. jaehyun loml
warnings: degrading words, softer yandere, simp behaviour 101, yandere, obsessive thoughts, HES such a diva imo, content warning yandere.
note. idk what the fuck I just wrote 😭 he’s such a simp I just nshshshhsbsb. I’m in love with jungkook it’s pathetic. thanks for reading! :dd ps my bday is in two days wohooo
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Jungkook despised your guts.
You made his skin crawl, his blood pressure rise as soon as he sees your figure walking in the campus, he hates how his heart is racing like some teenager idiot.
He can’t bring himself to tear his eyes away from you.
You are so infuriating every single time he sees you, it makes his brain shut down, his heartbeat becomes abnormally fast and his body itches with longing.
Fucking bitch, he chews on his lower lip, barely paying attention to whatever Jaehyun is talking about, rocking his feet back n forth to calm himself.
He wants you so bad. Jungkook realised that a long time ago, he wants you.
He doesn’t want to, he hates you.
But, “bro, stop gawking at her.” He blinks twice at Jaehyun’s tone, finally looking away from your figure.
Jungkook turns his body to the side, now looking at his best friend who gives him a look of disappointment.
“Do you see her laughing with that dumb blonde bitch? What’s so damn funny!” Jungkook gritted his teeth, “what a whore.” He inhaled a breath.
God, he was desperate.
Jaehyun cocked a brow at Jungkook’s cruel remarks about you, “aw look at you and your words… the look in your eyes doesn’t really suit your words”
Jungkook knows.
Jaehyun sighs, “Jungkook, you are in love with Y/N.”
The tattooed man gasped. “What the fuck, hell no!”
Jungkook was not in love with you, he just obsessively hated you, “she’s a loser, fuckin loser.” He hissed, in his defence while his friend only clicked his tongue.
“I HATE HER.”
“Sure.”
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Jungkook was not a stalker.
He was just…. Making sure of a few things,
He fixed his cap and tilted his body so you couldn’t see him, but he could see you,
All clearly.
“Umm Jungkook? Is that you?”
Fuck.
He quickly averted his gaze down to the floor, your footsteps approaching him, Jungkook wanted to run.
“Oh my gosh! Hi!” Your voice filled his ears, his body wasn’t reacting, how could be so dumb. “H-Hi loser.”
He gulped and finally made eye contact with you.
oh, you and your stupid pretty face.
Those eyes of yours annoyed him the most, so damn attractive it made his mind dizzy. “I didn’t know you liked the coffee here?” You laughed at his nickname for you.
He felt his cheeks get hot.
“So? What can I get you?” You looked at him with your eyes, he was getting nervous.
Damn your eyes.
“Ummm…. Whatever you like.”
Before Jungkook could stop his mouth, the words already came out.
“You mean, from my preferences?”
“S-Sure!”
He watched as you nodded with a cute expression on your face. He could feel his heart melt into a poodle.
ew.
“And…. WAIT Y/N…” he stood up before you could leave.
“Yeah?”
“Bring two. And have it with me. Keep me company…. Y-Your shift is almost over, isn’t it?”
“I-I need to tell you something…” he continued, wanting to look at you longer, his heartbeat rising.
I love you.
“Okay, give me a few minutes then.”
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laysalespoir · a month ago
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ONLY YOU - JEON JUNGKOOK [M]
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Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Reader (fem)
A/N: I don't have anything to say more than this is pure smut, with a tiny little bit of plot. Veeeeeeeery little lol😆 JK is a mafia boss, you should know that tho. 
Warnings: +18, SMUT, barely a plot, mafia!Jungkook au, dom/sub kink, dd/lg kink, size kink, rough sex, hair pulling, possessive actions, light degradation, praising there is a bit of fluff if you squint like really hard lol
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Jungkook smiles as he pulls you over him and wraps his arms tightly around you. You cuddle into his chest, face hiding in his neck comfortably and contentedly. His hands started to trace patterns over your skin under your oversize t-shirt that clearly belonged to him.
While he hates going on travels and leaving you behind for long periods of time due to his job, he loves the reunion, coming back to you. Especially the paradise that lays between your legs that always receives him with such eagerness.
"Mmm, such a good girl," he whispers, lifting your head up by the chin with one finger, gently, as he leans in to kiss you.
You smile against his lips happily. Feeling your smile, causes him to push his tongue past your lips and deepen the kiss, his hands tenderly roaming with caresses over your sides and hips.
You kiss him back, tongues playing softly, trying to show him how much you have missed him, as you wiggle your hips over his.
"Mmm…" he groans into the kiss and finds himself desperately grinding up into you, as his cock starts to bulge and harden against the soft exquisite feel of your flesh.
You whine against his lips, putting your legs on each side of his hips over the bed so you can grind more firmly against him.
"That's it, baby," he praises, making you whine in need again, "Tell me what you want," he firmly smacks and grabs your ass, leveraging it to rock more roughly against your pussylips as he gazes lustfully into your eyes.
"I... I want you, please…" You gasp, hips moving with the guidance of his hands as yours caress his face.
There was a new scar on his right cheek, under his eye –thanks, of course, to his job– which you caress with extra careness and gently. It does not go unnoticed by him, he looks deep into your eyes with a fire only you can and know how to control. Only you.
"Where do you want me, baby? Inside you?" His voice drops a few tones, his hand unstoppable caressing your ass cheeks.
"Yes, please…" You whimper, feeling your head already over the moon, and he hasn't touched you completely yet.
"Yeah, babygirl?" He cooes, almost like a mock, before pulling your panties to the side and recklessly crushes his cock through the depths of your cunt and holds you down all the way on his length. You cry in a whimper loudly for the sudden thrust, hand going to your mouth to prevent any louder sound to escape your mouth. "You want Daddy to fuck you and fill that tight pussy with his cum?"
You nod in answer, unable to find your voice, enjoying and loving the feeling of his cock deep inside you.
"Mmh… And if daddy pins you down… chokes you out… and fucks you like the good fucktoy you are, are you going to clench that pussy tight around his cock and beg for more?" He grunts between his railing thrusts, holding and slamming you down by the hips as he fucks your depths with desperate need to ruin you, to own you.
You whine in pleasure, your insides clenching thanks to his thrusts and words and how full he makes you feel. Fuck, you have missed him so much…
"Y-yes, daddy…"
"Then beg, baby, like the good lil' slut you are," a thrust followed by a slap over your ass and a hard groping of your right ass cheek, "and tell Daddy all the filthy and terrible things you want done to you."
"Please, daddy... Fuck me… Deep and hard, so the only thing I can think of is daddy's cock."
He pants and smirks in delight as he throws you around, face down over the couch and ass up; the way he manhandles you making you even more wet and ready; his cock thrusting back inside mercilessly, fucking you like a ragdoll, intent on beating and tearing you open for him, his cock so deep that make your insides feel it, feel him and only him, as he fucks your cunt with all his strength.
You can only whimper, groan and whine in pain and pleasure, accepting and enjoying everything Jungkook gives you.
"Squeeze daddy's cock, baby. Take it," he growls in your ear from behind, before kneeling and giving slow but deep thrusts that make your whole body tremble. "Make it yours…"
You moan, smiling at his words, turning your head a bit to be able to look at him from behind. "It is already mine, daddy…"
Your pussy clenches when he grabs your hair and pulls you til your back presses against his chest. His big, calloused hand slides from your hair to grab you by your neck, your head resting in the middle of his chest, tilted back a bit so you can look up at him. You feel so small against him, it makes Jungkook go feral.
"I-I'm gonna cum," you moan, your hands holding his forearm tight.
"That's what I want, babygirl. Give it to me," his eyebrows frown, and you know he won't last longer.
"Cum with me, daddy…"
His hand on your neck grips a tiny bit tighter, cock beginning to flex and spasm as your words lead him over the edge and he cums deep inside you, the heavy intakes of breath from his nose over your forehead fills you with his warmth.
You scratch lightly his forearm as you cum with him, thighs trembling and wetness sliding down through your pussylips down your legs, even with him still inside you.
After some minutes you both try to catch your breaths, he gathers you against his chest, big and strong arms surrounding your body, one of his hands caressing your face, tilting your head to a side so he can kiss your temple, whispering tender reassurances and praises into your ear as he rocks you gently.
"You're mine, Princess," he states, his cock twitching a bit inside you, making you smile.
"I love you too, Jungkook," you half whimper half laugh, hands caressing any part of him you could reach, still in that position, enjoying and accepting everything he is and gives to you.
Because at the end, you are his, and he is yours.
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2K notes · View notes
seokgism · a month ago
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october 4 ; phone sex with jeon jeongguk.
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pairing. jeon jeongguk x fem!reader | warnings. phone sex, heavy dirty talk, light daddy kink (literally one mention), mutual masturbation, brothers best friend trope, forbidden relationship, jeongguk’s lowkey a pervert, ocs lydia and lorenzo. | word count. 1.8k | kinktober masterlist.
summary. you accidentally send a nude to your brothers best friend, turns out he enjoys it more than you think.
you: can u do me a favor :)
lyds: depends…
you: i just need you to look at this pic i took and see if it’s sexy enough to send to this guy i’m talking to
lyds: yeah no
you: LYDIA PLS
lyds: i’m kidding!
lyds: send
As you went to press the camera icon, you got a text. The notification popped up from the top. You didn’t see who it was before you ignored it, sliding it up to the top (or so you thought you did), telling yourself you’d check it later. So you opened the camera icon, sending the picture.
You saw your friend had read the message, but she wasn’t saying anything. You thought nothing bad of it, assuming she had just opened the message while she was doing something and she’d respond after. So you exited the messages app and scrolled through your phone.
lyds: so you gonna send it or not?
Her message pops up. You furrow your eyebrows, confused. You sent it to her, right? RIGHT?
you: i did?
lyds: no you didn’t?
You scrolled up, through your messages — nothing. You swore you sent the picture to her. You literally saw “Read 11:25 PM!”
you: DUDE I THINK I SENT IT TO SOMEONE ELSE FUCK
lyds: OHMYGOD?
lyds: CHECK UR OTHER MESSAGES.
So you clicked out of your messages. Under her contact was Jeongguk’s which said, “Attachment: 1 Image.”
Fuck. You hoped, you prayed, that it was something else. You opened the messages and there it was. The picture of your naked breasts with your finger in between your lips under his message that said, “hey.”
While sliding his message to the top, you had accidentally pressed on it instead of clearing it. Idiot.
Quickly, you pressed the typing bar, immediately going to tell him it was an accident and that the picture wasn’t for him. But he beat you to it, sending you a picture in response.
His hard, long cock was standing up straight. Clear precum was dripping from his pink tip, down to his veiny shaft and his long, pale fingers were wrapped around his base.
Your eyes bulged out of their sockets. Your hand slapped over your mouth. You were baffled that he’d even send anything back, let alone a picture of his dick! You, his best friends little sister.
Another photo popped up. This time he used his front camera. His hand still wrapped around his cock and you got a full view of his abs. The camera was below his nose but you could see him biting his bottom lip, piercing in the corner. And his sexy tattoo sleeve. God, what you would do to have him choke you with that arm.
jeongguk: i sent two, your turn ;)
You were shocked. Way too shocked to say anything. You couldn’t do this. You had to tell him it was a complete accident. Oh, but you didn’t want him to feel like a dumbass! You couldn’t embarrass him like that.
jeongguk: taking that picture for me?
jeongguk: or are both your hands busy rn? ;)
How do you put a stop to this without making a fool of him? You wouldn’t say you didn’t like this, but he was your brothers best friend. You knew Jeongguk since your junior year of high school, braces and glasses and all. You were twenty-three now, having grown out of your ugliness. Jeongguk however, had always been sexy to you. You always had a small crush on him, but you forced yourself not to because you weren’t allowed to. You knew if your brother found out you and Jeongguk ever did anything, he’d kick Jeongguk’s ass.
The loud ping of a text message snapped you out of your thoughts.
Attachment: 1 Video
Hesitantly, you clicked on it, unlocking your phone, and pressing play.
“Fuck!” He moaned in the video. His hand was pumping up and down his long cock at a rapid pace. The clear precum dripping from his tip to his shaft shone from his phone flashlight. “So fucking sexy, Y/N! Wanna fuck your tits with my cock, fuck you got me so hard!”
Your thighs clenched. His cock was so pretty and long.
jeongguk: please say something
jeongguk: need you to talk to me baby i’m so close
you: pls stop
jeongguk: stop? you sent me that picture first
you: i’m sorry
jeongguk: don’t be, i loved it ;)
you: no i mean i sent that on accident
jeongguk: so? i didn’t
you: but what about enzo
You wanted this. So badly. You had a crush on the man since high school for fucks sake! But your brother, Lorenzo, truly wouldn’t approve.
jeongguk: fuck enzo
jeongguk: you’re a big girl
jeongguk: you make your own decisions
He was right. You guys were all adults now, maybe Lorenzo wouldn’t mind anymore. Right?
jeongguk: now play with me :(
jeongguk: i had to stop stroking my dick to text you smh
He sends another photo once again. His thumb is pressed on his tip, fingers around his base.
jeongguk: why don’t you come over and sit on my cock
you: don’t tempt me
jeongguk: atta girl
you: fuck you
jeongguk: i’d let you
You slide your hands into your panties, fingertips touching your clit. You feel your cunt slick with your essence.
you: you got me so wet
you: wanna sit on your cock so bad
you: you’re so big
You slid your fingers into your aching hole so easily, lubricated with your arousal. You let out a moan, watching as a text from Jeongguk popped up.
jeongguk: yeah? you touching yourself for me?
Fuck, how did he know you so well?
you: mhm
jeongguk: how many fingers?
you: two
jeongguk: put in one more
You obey even though he can’t even fucking see you. So whipped for him, you do anything he says.
you: three now
you: feels so good touching myself thinking about you
you: but i’m sure your thick cock would feel so much better
jeongguk: this thick cock wants your tight pussy so much baby
you: wanna cum on it so bad
jeongguk: i wanna cum all over you
jeongguk: inside your pussy
jeongguk: on your ass
jeongguk: in your mouth
jeongguk: on your face
jeongguk: on those big tits of yours
you: jeongguk i want you so bad
Your phone vibrates in your hand, shaking you from your pleasure. Jeongguk is calling you. Fuck. You slide the answer button.
“You still touching yourself?” He asks from the other side.
“Yes,” You moan.
“Oh, your moans are so sexy baby,” He whispers. “Wish I was there so I could fuck you.”
“Mmm, want you to fuck me so hard right now!”
“Yeah,” He chuckles. “You want it rough?”
“Yes, fuck! Want it so rough until I cry, until it hurts!”
Jeongguk made you so wet that when you shoved your fingers in and out of yourself so rapidly, you could hear the squelching sounds.
“If I had known Enzo’s little sister was so freaky, I would’ve fucked you already, baby.”
“Don’t talk about him while I’m touching myself please.”
He ignores you, “Who were you sending that picture to, huh?”
“N- no one!” You say through moans. Just listening to Jeongguk’s husky voice turned you on.
“Yeah? Fucking liar. I should go to your apartment and punish you.”
“Want you to punish me.”
Jeongguk strokes his cock lazily as he talks to you. He thinks your voice is pretty. And your moans. Your sweet pretty moans. Though he doesn’t chase his orgasm. He just strokes his cock, waiting for his orgasm to come itself.
“Yeah? Want Daddy to spank you till your ass is all red.”
You never really liked that word. But the way it slips off of Jeongguk’s tongue makes it so sexy.
“Yes, fuck!”
“Wanna fuck you so hard for being a bad girl.”
“Yeah? How hard?” You tease.
“So hard until you can't walk. Wanna tie your hands together and pound into your tight pussy until you squirt all over my cock. Please, baby just wanna fuck your pussy so bad.” He moans breathily into the phone.
“Maybe I should be a bad girl more often, hm?”
“Definitely,” He chuckles. “Oh baby, I’m close.”
“Me too,” You moan.
“Fuck, Y/N! The next time I see you I’m ripping off your fucking clothes and fucking you against the first piece of furniture I see! Even if it’s in front of your stupid brother!”
Though you would’ve scolded him for bringing up your brother at a time like this, you’re too caught up in your pleasure to even argue. “I- I’m gonna cum,”
“Cum for me, baby!”
The burning feeling in your stomach explodes and you’re shaking in pleasure. You moan loudly into the phone. On the other end, Jeongguk grunts. His thick white ropes of cum shoot out of his tip onto his stomach.
“Fuck! That was the hardest I came in so long.” He laughs. You smile even though he can’t see it. “Thank you.”
“Likewise.” You say.
“Listen this is fun. You and me. And I’d like for it to happen again.”
If your sixteen year old self was listening to this, she’d be jumping off of walls. Your childhood crush wanted to hook up with you. Of all people, you.
“Yeah, I’d like that.”
Like that? You’d love it.