Ericca, you sweet, amazing and lovely lady! Congratulations on your milestone! That is so fantastic and you really deserve it ❤️

You've always been so kind to me and such a good friend. I'm thankful I found you, the Beth to my Rip 😆❤️

You know I'm a fluffball, so of course I'd send an ask. I'm also indecisive, so... two prompts for our Billy boy? 😅🙈

“don’t listen to that voice inside your head, listen to mine.”

"Nothing makes me more happy than making you smile."

Your Billy will forever be my favorite ❤️

My sweet Sofie, thank you and thank you for sending these in, I’m sorry it’s taken me a little while to finally get to this one but I really hope you like it! I love you to pieces and I’ll always be the Beth to your Rip ❤️

What Makes You Beautiful

Photos are not mine. They are courtesy of Pinterest/Google

Pairing: Billy Russo x F! Reader

Warnings: couple of swear words, self doubt, reader feeling insecure about her body, fluff

Word Count: a little over 2K

Summary: Billy and reader are married and have a new baby. Reader is feeling insecure about her post baby body, he reassures her she is the only one for him.

A/N: This ask kinda got away from me, what was supposed to be around 1K words, turned into a little over 2K words so I figured I’d just make it a whole thing complete with moodboard. And thank you Sofie for helping me with the title, I was having a hell of a time. ❤️

Nothing was more picture perfect than the sight in front of you. The sight of your handsome husband asleep on the couch holding your precious baby daughter on his chest, also asleep, was something you were still getting used to.

Billy Russo was a marine, a CEO, a combat veteran, and now, a father. You never thought you would ever see the day where Billy would be content holding a baby. He was nervous at first when you told him he was going to be a father.

He had so many questions, one of them being “Do you think I’ll be a good dad, y/n?” The worried look on his face broke your heart, you could see he was scared, but did your best to put his worries to rest. “Well we’re going to find out, aren’t we. I’ll be right here with you, Billy. I’m scared too, but we can learn together.”

Billy never knew what real love was, he had never been shown, but he eventually learned sometimes the hard way but he did learn. He learned it so well in fact that when he asked you to marry him, it was a complete surprise.

You had never talked about it and weren’t sure if he would ever be ready to get married. Shock and awe are the only two words you could use to describe what you felt that day, tears were shed by both of you but there wasn’t any hesitation in your answer. Of course you would marry him.

That was three years ago, it hasn’t been all sunshine and rainbows but he was the love of your life and you would work hard at keeping what you fought so hard to attain—true love. And he would try his hardest to do the same.

And now the two of you were parents, to the sweet little angel asleep on her father’s chest. With each rise and fall of Billy’s chest, you watched her entire body move up and down, her tiny fist balled up next to her face, and her ink like hair that matched her father’s sticking straight up off of her little head. She was so beautiful, your little Ruby—Ruby Faye Russo.

Being new parents, it was difficult to find time to be with just one another but it was important that you and Billy still did things together just the two of you. It was getting easier to leave Ruby while you went out.

Your parents were always very eager to look after their granddaughter and the Castle family could not come over fast enough if Billy asked them if they could babysit for a few hours while the two of you went out to dinner.

It had been six months since Ruby was born, things were going as well as could be expected with two brand new parents. Ups and downs, good days, not so good days but you had settled into a routine and had managed to make time for you and Billy to go out on dates with each other twice a month.

But there was one thing that had been bothering you, especially for the past couple of months. You still couldn’t fit into your pre-baby clothes and even though Ruby was six months old now, your emotions continued to move in roller coaster fashion about it.

You were constantly questioning yourself. “Does he still find me attractive? What if I can’t lose the weight? Will he leave me for someone else?” Stupid hormones and they finally got the best of you while you were getting ready for a dinner date with Billy one night.

He said he was taking you somewhere nice, made arrangements for Maria, Frank, and the kids to come over to take care of Ruby, and Billy also took care of the baby so you could get ready for the evening.

Wanting to look your best, you went all out. You curled your hair, added a pretty red flower to the side, exaggerated your winged eyeliner, and put on red lipstick. But when it came time to put the dress on that you had picked out, that’s when it all fell apart. It still didn’t fit.

Billy walked into the bedroom after you put your dressing robe back on. “Look who finally fell asleep.” You smiled looking at Ruby asleep on her father’s shoulder. Billy placed a soft kiss on the top of the baby’s head and said “I’m gonna go put her down so I can get ready, I’ll be right back, beautiful.”

Beautiful. The way that term of endearment rolled off of his tongue, he loved you so much. But it was hard to get out of your own head sometimes, and before you knew what was happening, tears had welled up in your eyes about to spill over when he came back into the bedroom.

“Do you think I should wear the gray or the black su—? Hey, hey baby, what’s wrong?” Billy asked. Immediately pulling a tissue from the box on your vanity, he started to catch the fresh tears that fell from your eyes.

“It doesn’t fit.” You said with a hitch in your voice.

Billy’s dark eyes, like two pieces of onyx, gazed at you full of love and concern.

“What doesn’t fit, sweet girl?” He asked and glanced quickly at the dress on the bed. “The dress?”

You nodded. “I still don’t have a lot that fits me right now, Billy. And I keep thinking what if I can’t get back into those clothes?”

He caught a couple stray tears that ran down your cheek.

“Why are you sayin’ things like that? I need to you tell me what you’re feelin’, y/n.” He said.

Billy Russo was a lot of things and great communicator was not one of them but today you were the one that was having trouble getting your words out.

“I—I don’t feel very pretty right now, Billy. And I’m afraid if I can’t lose the baby weight that—that you won’t find me pretty anymore either.” You voice was strained, trying as hard as you could to keep from completely breaking down.

A slight smile crept across Billy’s face. “That’s what’s botherin’ you? Come with me, beautiful.” He took your hand and led you out of the bedroom into Ruby’s room.

When you found out you were having a baby girl, pink was not an option, that’s not what you envisioned. Black and white with accents of red decorated her room with her name painted in red above her crib.

You took a minimalist approach to decorating her nursery, but there was an obvious theme of red hearts and bows. You remembered how you cried after you finished painting her name above her crib because you just could not wait to meet her.

Billy ushered you over to Ruby’s crib, she was fast asleep on her back with her hands above her head, and the two of you staring down at the little angel you brought into the world.

“Look at her, y/n.” He whispered.

Shifting your eyes from his, you gazed down at Ruby sleeping so peacefully. Moments like this were so…perfect.

“Look at what you’ve given me. You gave me something I never thought I would ever have or even want. We’re a family and I love you endlessly. You are the most beautiful woman in the world to me because you make me laugh, you taught me how to love, you accept me for who I am and because you gave me my little girl down there. Not because you can fit into some stupid dress.”

You stood there in silence as he poured his heart out to you, still catching your tears in the tissue and trying to not smudge your makeup.

“I love you too, Billy. So much.” You said.

He cupped your face in both of his hands and smiled warmly at you. “Don’t listen to that voice inside your head, listen to mine. It’s always going to tell you that you’re beautiful, my love. Always.”

Billy leaned in to kiss you, his kisses peppered your forehead, to your cheeks and finally to your lips. He didn’t care that he had red lipstick on his lips now and you didn’t mind that he had smudged it, it could be fixed. His long arms wrapped tightly around you and he hugged you with such force that all of the air had escaped your lungs.

Little Ruby stirred in her crib but quickly fell back to sleep while you and Billy quietly slipped out of her room and back to your bedroom.

“So can I still take my wife out to dinner tonight? I’ll take you to get a new dress on the way if you want, just say the word, baby.” He said with that perfect smile splashed across his face.

Finally after the tears, you let out a little laugh. “Yes Billy, I’d love to go out to dinner with you. But you don’t have to buy me a new dress, I’m pretty sure I have something else I can wear.”

Of course he was finished getting ready before you, all he had to do was throw on his suit and he was ready so he went to wait for you in the living room while you finished. After fixing your makeup, you found the perfect outfit. A red pencil skirt and a slim fit black top, they both fit and more importantly, the outfit made you feel beautiful.

You were confident as you walked out to greet your husband.

“Hey there, handsome.” You said batting your eyelashes at him, playfully.

Billy looked up from scrolling on his phone. “Holy shit…baby, you look—you look perfect.”

The desire in his eyes as he jumped up to meet you as you walked towards him was all you needed to see to know how he felt about you.

He brushed your cheek with his knuckles as he looked down at you, wanting to kiss you but you stopped him. “Don’t mess up my lipstick again, Mr. Russo or we’re never going to get out of here.” You said.

His eyes roamed all over you from head to toe and then stopped right at your chest. “Actually Mrs. Russo, I was thinking about how great your tits look in this, my god.”

You weren’t expecting his comment so a burst of laughter came from deep down in your stomach but quickly stopped when you remembered Ruby was asleep in her room.

Playfully slapping him on the shoulder, you whisper yelled “Billy, you can’t make me laugh like that when the baby is sleeping!” You slapped his shoulder one more time.

He pulled you into an embrace and just held you for a brief moment. “Nothing makes me happier, than making you smile, sweet girl.” He kissed the top of your head. “I hope our little girl has your laugh, she already has your sass.”

You pulled away and narrowed your eyes at him. “She does not!”

Billy raised his eyebrows at you. “Oh did you forget that she pulled the nurses hair right after she was born?”

You shied away from him a little bit but also you bit back a smile because you did remember, how could you forget? As soon as she was born, the nurse took her from you and little Ruby grabbed hold of that nurse’s hair and would not let go. “She’s got my hair! She’s got my hair!” She yelled. It was a memory you and Billy would always remember and it would always put a smile on your face.

All of a sudden, there was a knock on your door and Frank’s voice boomed from the other side. “Open up Russo’s, we wanna hold that baby!!”

“Well, I think Uncle Frank is here.” You said sarcastically.

Billy looked in the direction of the door and back to you. “Sure sounds that way, you ready for dinner, my love?”

“I am ready, baby. I love you.” You said with a smile. “You better let Frank in before he breaks the door down.”

He smiled and winked back at you. “I love you too, beautiful.” Frank continued to knock, never letting up. “I’m gonna kill him.”

With a furrowed brow and lips pressed firmly together because of the incessant knocking, Billy turned and headed for the door.

“I’m coming, Frankie! Hold ON!”

Tag List: @mindidjarin @saintmurd0ck @wheresthesunshinesblog @rafaelakelley @idaoftheburningmind @snowkestrel @xdervyxccgh @mattmurdocksscars @fakehappy27 @music-indie-tv @fictional-hooman @kayhi808 @munsonownsmyass @gijos @celestialams

If you’d like to be added to (or removed from) my tag list for the ever so handsome Billy Russo, just let me know and thank you again for reading! 💕💕💕

I was thinking about my post from yesterday, and what is infinitely more interesting to me than Brandon calling Helia a pacifist (somewhat out of spite) is the fact that Helia definitely heard him, and chose not to refute it. Instead, he decided to prove him wrong by being the only one who could actually hold back the monster. When you think about it, literally every scene which has Helia playing a big role involves him having to prove himself. Like with the whole Shaab stone thing, when some of the others are critical of his leadership. The interesting thing here, although, is the fact that he NEVER defends himself when people doubt his abilities, but sort of quietly does his own thing and people eventually grow to respect his abilities.

We can even see this as late as Season 6. When Helia feels like he’s let Flora down, he channels this energy into taking down a bunch of werewolves, instead of maybe accepting the fact that it is alright to not be perfect at everything. This is one of the reasons we barely see what’s going on with him, since he never seems to calculate his self-worth on the basis of how other people see him, it’s entirely based on how useful he feels. 

What is fascinating and kind of hilarious about this is the fact that he technically could shut everyone up by going all out. This is why I love the idea of prodigy Helia, because this mentality is typical of highly gifted people, since you start to feel kind of dissociated from your own self and capacity, especially when people praise you. It’s uncomfortable, it’s like imposter syndrome but you’re both the imposter and the standard. In that episode in S6, when Icy freezes his heart, there’s something specific that Helia says that reveals a lot about the specific brand of darkness that bothers him. He picks a fight with Riven and says something along the lines of “it being time to put RIven in his place”. One could take that as a simple goading, but think about how quickly Helia beat Riven - at hand-to-hand combat, no less, something he has hardly engaged in throughout his time onscreen. Helia KNOWS he could easily beat any or at least most of the guys, but for the most part, he couldn’t be bothered to. I’ve not a whole lot of love for the later seasons of the show, but this episode was a great example of Helia’s relationship with heroics itself. He tells Riven to “get over” himself, really highlighting the fact that despite his fairly self-assured facade most of the time, he does harbour SOME frustration for the more showy aspects of the Specialists, since that is generally what leads to him getting overshadowed most of the time.

This isn’t to say that every decision he’s made is entirely rational, but it always seems to stem about of a need to prove to himself more than anyone else that what people say about him is wrong. THIS IS WHY HIS STRUGGLE IS UNIQUE. His insecurity is built on things that happen externally, but his focus when coping with it is completely internal. Similarly, when he makes mistakes that impact other people, he deals with it by punishing himself. This is so so fascinating because it’s somehow the exact opposite of Sky’s law-abiding heroism, and even Riven’s videogame-esque worldview. When he volunteered to save Sky, he was defo doubted. It makes sense, because even his self-assuredness seems to come from a somewhat unstable sense of self. Nobody knows what Helia’s deal is because he never really feels the need to prove himself unless it is absolutely required, and ofc it was required when Sky almost fell into oblivion. Same with the Shaab stone stuff. Helia the hero seems to have a different self-perception altogether from Helia the general dudeo. 

I would think that after years of dealing with him, his friends and Flora will have realised this about him, and generally stay out of his way when he feels the need to prove something to himself. But the S6 incident is surprising to them because he’s never felt the need to prove his comparative worth, that he’s BETTER than anyone else, especially on his team. Riven is always ready for a fight we know, but getting there-is-nothing-friendly-about-friendly-fights Helia to a duel must have been exactly what he’d been waiting for so long, since even after all those years, nobody was probably still sure of what Helia’s actual skillset was. Again, SUCH A GIFTED PERSON THING TO DO. It also checks out that he’s so supportive of everyone else’s improvement while being great at what he does but still unsure of himself.

For the OC meme! 15 and 27 for Yrsinne and H for YOU about them!

Aww thank you so much for giving me an opportunity to gush about my child <33

15: How do they speak? Is what they say usually thought of on the spot, or do they rehearse it in their mind first?

After century after century of being told what to say and having to watch every word on their home planet, Yrsinne really stopped giving a shit. After their very, very long time floating in the void of space without any stimuli, silence is one of the only things that terrify them and to combat this they talk. A lot. Hence their words aren't really calculated most of the time, and they have the tendency of being brutally honest with most, so you really can't anticipate the next word that will come out of their mouths (except for Joseph hehe). Yrsinne is the type to comment on moss or randomly bring up "I heard you humans had a tradition where a big ol' man breaks into yar houses every cold to bring ya presents. Yar shitting me right?"

Although, since they are of regal blood and pretty much led a galactic revolution, in the right context they can be very calculative. You will piss your pants.

27: What causes them to feel dread?

I've explored this theme a bit before, but let me wrap you up. For leading an uprising for centuries to overturn their government (which is their own parents but that's another story) and putting the empire to shits, they were captured after having their allies wiped out and sent in exile in space. On Phovivis, community is a pivotal element of life (although it has to be "perfect", just like everything else), so eternal exile is the greatest dishonor and worst punishment, as they pride themselves in being a civilised specie that does not do bodily harm. Hence Yrsinne was put in a small spacecraft and trapped there, levitating in a fixed point in a pitch black machine with no light, no sound, no touch. They were sent to a deep, deep corner of space thought to be empty to spend the rest of eternity in torture (or get sucked into a black hole and die). Fortunately their aircraft fell into a wormhole that lead somewhere to our solar system and they fell to Earth. All of this to say that they spent centuries, maybe millenia feeling nothing, and they are terrified of anything that might resemble that again. Obviously they suffer from severe ptsd from this horrible experience, and dread the dark, the silence and the lack of stimulation. Although there always is something going on on Earth, being in a dimly lit room will make them uneasy; and not being able to talk or hear life will make them panic. Hard. Refrain from mentionning space and cosmic eternity around them, they might become unresponsive for some time. For everyone's safety, please provide Yrsinne with a nightlight and background music at night. It is not easy to console a 7'2 ft and more than 300 lbs alien hunk. Beware of the claws.

Appart from these triggers, they are quite fearless and love a new sensation. You could stab them and they may thank you for making them discover man made weapons. The best of the team to send exploring weird and unsafe places.

H)What trait do you admire most?

Their huge muscles and dashing charm

Their curiosity and sheer power of will. Yrsinne wants to learn everything there is, explore every place, learn every name and eat every food. They experience new things with extasy and a kind of childish innocence, holding no prejudice and no doubt towards themselves. Yrsinne is very social and makes friends and connections easily. They are a resilient person, although their tough and confident experience hides deep insecurity and self loathing, they'll never give up on something they set their mind to. I love that for them and would like to be able to experience things as they do. We both may be socially inept but they're cool enough that no one cares. Teach me your ways alien child

He Makes You Feel Insecure ~ Sting

A/N: Final-fucking-ly. excuse my language. You have no idea how long I’ve been playing with this idea in my head and just not being able to write it out. It was horrible. I hope you like it! I’ll try to post some more stuff the upcoming week but I can’t promise anything since everything is a bit overwhelming lately. Thank you for all the love and support! Don’t hesitate to drop me a request as well or just come and say hi 🥰

Warnings: insecurities (he makes you feel like you’re overdramatic), swearing, wounds

Genre: angst to fluff

Other versions:

Gray ~ Laxus ~ Cobra/Erik ~ Bickslow ~ Gajeel ~ Natsu ~ Jellal ~ Freed ~ Rogue

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"Is that really all you got, Yukino" you taunted the girl as a smug look was plastered on your face. The celestial mage was panting heavily in front of you. She had come to you a couple of weeks ago to learn how to wield a sword since she felt useless in a battle when she didn't have her keys. You happily agreed to it, seeing it as an opportunity to train more.

She charged at you, holding the diamond sword you made earlier diagonally in front of her face, ready to strike but at the same ready to block any attack that comes her way, just like you taught her.

You swiftly moved away, spinning on your feet in the progress as you slowly formed diamond armour around your body. You wanted to practise closer combat without your sword, which is why you were so focused on your defence. You knew you wouldn't always be able to rely on your sword skills, so this was the perfect moment to practice. 

Nobody doubted for a second the fact that you were an excellent swordswoman,it was the exact reason why Yukino came to you in the first place. But you could get overconfident, resulting in you slacking your moves and getting careless, and that's exactly what happened

Your back was still facing the celestial mage as you took your time, presuming she wouldn't be able to recover that quickly after you swept her feet from underneath her. But you were wrong, resulting in Yukino getting a direct hit on you. Unbeknownst to her, she hit you in your blind spot which was right in between shoulder blades. It was the spot where your armour was the weakest.

You fell forward, immediately forming a dome made out of diamond around you in an attempt to shield you from any following attempts.

 Yukino gasped at your reaction, knowing you only made that move when you were hurt badly "(Y/N)! I am so sorry! I didn't mean to-"

You let the shield crumble down again, making you visible to your friend. Placing a knee on the ground and pushing yourself up, you winced at the burning sensation. "It's fine, I was careless. It's not your fault"

Your reassuring words didn't ease the worry that was swimming through Yukino's mind "I'll go get some stuff to clean it up"

"No, it's fine, I'll go get it myself in a bit." You stopped the girl from running away as you stood up straight in an attempt to show her you were fine "you are progressing really fast"

"It's all thanks to you. Are you sure you don't need me to check up on your wound?" She offered again.

"Yeah, I'll be okay. Maybe I'll try roping Sting into pampering me. That way he'd at least has done something useful today" you attempted to joke to make the younger mage feel better, and it was a success as a small chuckled left her lips. "Let's go back shall we"

Once back, the stinging sensation had still not died down. In fact, it only got worse.

"Sting" you whined as you leaned your head against your boyfriend's shoulder.

He chuckled at your childishness as he turned to look at you "yes, my love?"

"I got badly hurt during training with Yukino" you pouted "can you take a look at it?"

A chuckle left his lips once again "sure drama queen, where is it?"

"I'm not being a drama queen" you stepped away from him, the pout was still evident on your face but this time it was paired with your scrunched eyebrows.

"Of course you're not" sarcasm dripping from the words that just left his mouth.

"What do mean by that?" Your lips were now tightly pressed together, forming a straight line. You were now standing directly in front of him with your arms crossed in front of your chest.

"Remember that time you thought Rogue got kidnapped while he just overslept?" Sting explained, but you were quick to defend yourself "in my defence, Rogue had never once overslept."

"Fine, what about that time I twisted my ankle and thought I had broken it for sure" the crease between your eyebrows deepened as he kept listing situations "or that time you thought some guy was harassing Minerva while they were just out on a date?"

"I was just worried" you mumbled as you recalled more encounters where you were indeed overdramatic.

  "All I'm saying is, you tend to enlarge things. That's why I'm pretty sure that it's only a scratch, after all, Yukino just learned how to handle a sword. There's no way she could've hit you, the best swordswoman of our guild, that hard. But if you want I could still look at the wittle wound" he cooed at you, unknowingly worsening your mood.

"No. It's fine. I'm probably just being overdramatic again" the coldness that was latched to your words, send shivers down the guild master's spine, but before he could even muster an apology, you had turned on your heels and left to go home.

That night when Sting came home, he apologized and told you he didn't mean to make you feel that way. However, his words felt shallow, leaving nothing but an empty promise to be better.

The following days, the burning sensation only got worse, but you kept telling yourself that it was nothing. It was probably only a scratch just like Sting said.

Ignoring the pain, you kept going on about your days like normal. You kept making mental notes to not get swallowed by the worry for your guildmates and blow everything out of proportion. You absolutely did not want to be known as the girl who cried wolf.

Nobody seemed to notice, at least, so you thought. The boy in the shadows that liked observing more than talking to people noticed every small change from the moment Sting called you overdramatic.

It's why he wasn't surprised when Sting called him one morning, panic coated every word he spoke "Rogue! (Y/N) isn't waking up! I don't know what happened! Shit! Rogue! Help! What do I do?"

"Get her to the hospital as soon as possible, I'll meet you there" he replied in a much calmer voice. He knew he'd make matters only worse if he'd let his own worry shine through.

Sting had successfully brought you to the hospital in under ten minutes, Rogue shortly arrived after you two.

"I don't know what happened... She seemed fine yesterday…" Sting trailed off as the twin dragon slayers were seated next to your hospital bed.

"Did she really though?" Rogue sighed which earned him a questioning look from the blonde " (Y/N) hasn't been herself for almost a week"

"What do you mean? She seems perfectly normal to me?" Sting's gaze averted from his friend to you as he tried to recall any odd behaviour, but nothing came to mind.

A heavy sigh left the raven-haired mage again "ever since you called her overdramatic, she's been acting more distant, being less expressive. I think you hit a nerve when you said those words"

Sting was quick to defend himself "it can't be that. I apologized that night, and she told me it was nothing, that she didn't care"

"Whatever you say" he mumbled as he noticed your hand twitching.

Sting quickly grasped that same hand and waited patiently for you to open yours, while anticipation filled his. "I'll go get a doctor"

Rogue re-entered with a doctor sooner after, once you were fully awake " Ah, miss (L/N) good to see you awake"

You nodded your head awkwardly before she continued "you had a nasty looking cut between your shoulder blades, were you aware of that?"

"Yes," you mumbled as you fiddled with your finger, afraid to make eye contact with anyone.

The doctor sighed as she put the clipboard down "there was an infection spreading from that wound due to pieces of diamond stuck in it. Had you waited any longer, you would have died. Why didn't you come sooner"

You felt incredibly small as all eyes were looking at you, waiting for you to respond "I didn't think it was that bad. I didn't want to seem overdramatic"

As soon as the last word rolled off your tongue, Sting's eyes grew wide in realization. Rogue was right. "We'll give you a moment"

"(Y/N)" you refused to meet his eyes, even when he grabbed your hand to stop you from fiddling, so he tried again but with a more stern tone this time "(Y/N) look at me"

You did as he requested and wished you could sink into the darkness as Rogue could right there and then. The hurt and disappointment that were swimming in his eyes made your gut wrench as you never intended to upset him "why didn't you say anything?"

"You said that I was being a drama queen and that there was probably nothing to be worried about, so I assumed that it was just that, me being my overdramatic self" you explained, your eyes averting again to your fingers that were now intertwined with Sting.

"I thought I told you I didn't mean that" he frowned at the fact that you didn't even dare to look at him.

"But you were right!" You explained fed up as frustration tears started to form in the corner of your eyes "I am overdramatic. I blow everything out of proportion. I am just a burden that brings unnecessary stress into everyone's lives"

"Okay stop that. First of all, you are not a burden, nobody thinks that so stop it. Second of all, I am really really sorry that I made you doubt yourself. You're not overdramatic, well maybe a little, but it's not a bad thing. It shows how much you care about all of us. I'd rather have you blow things out of proportion than minimalize it and have bad things happen like this" he explained.

"You really think so?" You ask, your watery eyes finally meeting his.

"I know so. I am so sorry for making you feel so insecure about yourself. That was never my intention, please forgive me" he pleaded.

"I forgive you, I'm sorry for not saying anything sooner about the wound" you reply as you kissed his hand.

"It's alright. Now get some rest, my love. I'll be here when you wake up"

How To Fight Writers Block

hello, hello. hope everyone is doing well. as you can all tell, this post will be about how to fight writers block.

it’s really annoying to me when I hear people say “oh you don’t have writers block, you’re just lazy.”

first of all, yes, I am naturally lazy. second of all, how dare you. writing isn’t as easy as many think. granted, all you have to do is write down words on paper, but it’s not always easy to find the right words to express what you are feeling, or what you wish to say.

I have had terrible writer’s block for the last few days and it’s horrible! as a business owner or a small writing store, I have to be ready to write and fulfill my clients’ ideas and orders.

it’s not easy. It takes a heavy toll on my imagination, and digs me a deep pit of blockage, drowning in the lack of originality because of the constant writing and repetition or certain phrases and sentences in different projects.

i am making this post in the hopes to remind myself about over coming the dreaded and sometimes skeptically believed writer’s block.

What is writer’s block?

Yeah, I know. We all know what that is, but let me define it.

is the state of being unable to proceed with writing, and/or the inability to start writing something new

some people believe it to be a real problem, others believe it's “all in your head”

What Causes Writer’s Block?

in the 1970s, clinical psychologists Jerome Singer and Michael Barrios decided to find out

they concluded that there are four broad causes of writer's block:

Excessively harsh self-criticism

Fear of comparison to other writers

Lack of external motivation, like attention and praise

Lack of internal motivation, like the desire to tell one's story

How to overcome writer's block: 20 tips

1. Develop a writing routine:

Author and artist Twyla Tharp once wrote: “Creativity is a habit, and the best creativity is a result of good work habits.”

it might seem counterintuitive

if you only write when you “feel creative,” you're bound to get stuck in a tar pit of writer's block

The only way to push through is by disciplining yourself to write on a regular schedule. It might be every day, every other day, or just on weekends — but whatever it is, stick to it!

2. Use "imperfect" words:

A writer can spend hours looking for the perfect word or phrase to illustrate a concept

You can avoid this fruitless endeavor by putting, “In other words…” and simply writing what you’re thinking, whether it’s eloquent or not

You can then come back and refine it later by doing a CTRL+F search for “in other words.”

3. Do non-writing activities:

one of the best ways to climb out of a writing funk is to take yourself out of your own work and into someone else’s

Go to an exhibition, to the cinema, to a play, a gig, eat a delicious meal

immerse yourself in great STUFF and get your synapses crackling in a different way

Snippets of conversations, sounds, colors, sensations will creep into the space that once felt empty

4. Freewrite through it:

free-writing involves writing for a pre-set amount of time without pause — and without regard for grammar, spelling, or topic. You just write.

The goal of freewriting is to write without second-guessing yourself — free from doubt, apathy, or self-consciousness, all of which contribute to writer's block. Here’s how:

Find the right surroundings. Go somewhere you won't be disturbed.

Pick your writing utensils. Will you type at your computer, or write with pen and paper? (Tip: if you're prone to hitting the backspace button, you should freewrite the old-fashioned way!)

Settle on a time-limit. Your first time around, set your timer for just 10 minutes to get the feel for it. You can gradually increase this interval as you grow more comfortable with freewriting.

5. Relax on your first draft:

Many writers suffer form perfectionism, which is especially debilitating during a first draft

“Blocks often occur because writers put a lot of pressure on themselves to sound ‘right’ the first time. A good way to loosen up and have fun again in a draft is to give yourself permission to write imperfectly.” — editor Lauren Hughes

perfect is the enemy of good,” so don't agonize about getting it exactly right! You can always go back and edit, maybe even get a second pair of eyes on the manuscript

6. Don’t start at the beginning:

the most intimidating part of writing is the start, when you have a whole empty book to fill with coherent words

instead of starting with the chronological beginning of whatever it is you’re trying to write, dive into middle, or wherever you feel confident

7. Take a shower:

Have you ever noticed that the best ideas tend to arrive while in the shower, or while doing other “mindless” tasks?

research shows that when you’re doing something monotonous (such as showering, walking, or cleaning), your brain goes on autopilot, leaving your unconscious free to wander without logic-driven restrictions

showering is my favourite thing to do if I may add

8. Balance your inner critic:

successful writers have in common is the ability to hear their inner critic, respectfully acknowledge its points, and move forward

You don't need to completely ignore that critical voice, nor should you cower before it

you must establish a respectful, balanced relationship, so you can address what's necessary and skip over what's insecure and irrelevant

9. Switch up your tool:

a change of scenery can really help with writer's block. However, that scenery doesn't have to be your physical location — changing up your writing tool can be just as big a help!

if you’ve been typing on your word processor of choice, try switching to pen and paper. Or if you're just sick of Google Docs, consider using specialized novel writing software.

10. Change your POV:

great advice from editor Lauren Hughes: “When blocked, try to see your story from another perspective ‘in the room’ to help yourself move beyond the block. How might a minor character narrate the scene if they were witnessing it? A ‘fly on the wall’ or another inanimate object?

11. Exercise your creative muscles:

Any skill requires practice if you want to improve, and writing is no different! So if you’re feeling stuck, perhaps it’s time for a strengthening scribble-session to bolster your abilities

12. Map out your story:

If your story has stopped chugging along, help it pick up steam by taking a more structured approach — specifically, by writing an outline

13. Write something else:

Though it's important to try and push through writer's block with what you're actually working on, sometimes it's simply impossible

feel free to push your current piece to the side for now and write something new

14. Work on your characters:

It follows that if your characters are not clearly defined, you’re more likely to run into writer’s block

15. Stop writing for readers:

write for yourself, not your potential readers

this will help you reclaim the joy of being creative and get you back in touch with what matters: the story.

this is something I really need to do. because of my etsy business i don't write for fun anymore, but instead as a business and a deadline. i'm going to have to pull out my old crappy wattled fanfics or write some new ones.

16. Try a more visual process:

when words fail you, forget them and get visual. Create mind maps, drawings, Lego structures — ideally related to your story, but whatever unblocks your mind!

17. Look for the root of it:

writer’s block often comes from a problem deeper than simple “lack of inspiration.” So let's dig deep: why are you really blocked? Ask yourself the following questions:

Do I feel pressure to succeed and/or competition with other writers?

Have I lost sight of what my story is about, or interest in where it's going?

Do I lack confidence in my own abilities, even if I've written plenty before?

Have I not written for so long that I feel intimidated by the mere act?

Am I simply feeling tired and run-down?

once you identify what's wrong, it'll be so much easier to fix.

18. Quit the Internet:

If willpower isn’t your strong suit and your biggest challenge is staying focused, try a site blocker like Freedom or an app like Cold Turkey

19. Let the words find you:

meditate, go for a walk, take that shower

Word Palette is a great app that features a keyboard of random words, allowing you to simply click your way to your next masterpiece.

You can also try AI auto-completers like Talk to Transformer, where you can enter a phrase and let the app “guess what comes next.”

even though they often produce nonsense, it's a great way to help that writer's block.

20. Write like Hemingway:

And if your biggest block is your own self-doubt about your prose, Hemingway offers suggestions to improve your writing as you go

it's a pretty cool app if you ask me.

it highlights your sentences (if need be) and makes suggestions on how to improve them!

well, there you have it! a lengthy post on how to fight writer's block. now i just hope i can combat my own soon.

like, comment and reblog if you find this useful! feel free to reblog in instagram and tag me perpetualstories

Follow me on instagram and tumblr for more writing and grammar tips and more!

We Need You

Bucky x reader

Word count: 1901

Summary: Bucky comforts a reader with imposter syndrome (inability to believe that one’s success is deserved)

Warnings: imposter syndrome, low self worth/self esteem, feeling worthless, slight angst, mostly comfort

A/N: I have issues that present similarly to imposter syndrome, but I don’t experience it fully or severely. You belong and wherever you are, you fucking earned that. You worked hard to get where you are. I hope this fic can bring you some comfort, I apologize if I did not serve the topic justice. Sorry it took so long! As always, if anyone needs anything from me or just wants to talk and vent, I am ALWAYS here! <3

Tags: @buckys2thicc @buckfics @thatfangirl42 @mardema @barnesplums @bucks-bunny @stucky-on-spiderman @peggycarter-steverogers @freigeistundanderes

Add yourself to my taglist! Masterlist

------

You were calm, cool and collected. Smart, dedicated, and hard-working. You were an Avenger, one of the more valuable assets to the team with your training in hand to hand combat and knowledge of weaponry. 

At least, that’s how everyone saw you. Everyone except you. 

Every “job well done” translated to “I could’ve done better” for you. Compliments in a way felt like pity to you. Like it was all a lie or something. You could’ve been better, you didn’t think you were anything special. 

Anytime someone gave you praise you would wave it off with a small smile. Everyone saw it as you being modest, but internally you just couldn’t accept it. You couldn’t accept praise knowing you could’ve done better.

Settle for nothing less than perfection. But nobody’s perfect.

You were endlessly grateful for your team, your family, but you couldn’t help but feel like you didn’t deserve it. You had so much good in your life, but you felt like you had to keep proving yourself. 

You had everything you could ever want, but you still felt like you had to earn it. 

You thought you had done a good job at keeping it hidden. Imposter syndrome you had heard someone call it at one point. You had looked into it, realizing more and more of it resonated with you. You didn’t feel that you deserved your spot on the team, even though most of the team could agree that you were one of their best fighters. 

You were also one of the kindest people on the team, and everyone enjoyed being in your company. Again, you wrote it off as them feeling obligated to talk to you rather than them choosing to talk to you. 

Everything you thought about yourself, the degrading names you called yourself, and the way you waved off all of your achievements didn’t match up at all with the way anyone thought about you. 

It went unnoticed to most. You would put up a front, small smiles and thank you’s occasionally. There would be small side comments that you would make occasionally, but it was nothing that would cause red flags to arise. 

It’s nothing, really.

I didn’t do anything you wouldn’t have done.

It’s no big deal.

No worries

That’s why I’m here I guess

Compliments were deflected. Whenever you received criticism you would internalize it even though you knew it was nothing against you. Friendly advice to improve job performance. But for you, it reinforces the thought that your performance needed to be improved.

No matter what you did, you would never be good enough. You used to chase achievements, telling yourself that if you did well enough, if you did good things, that you would feel a sense of self worth. That maybe if you achieved things you would be filled with a sense of pride.

Instead you were left feeling as though you didn’t deserve any of the recognition you received. In a way, it made you feel even more insecure.

You thought that if you accepted the praise you would seem self indulgent or boastful that if you said what your achievements were you would seem prideful. So you accepted them with a small smile and thank you. At least until people moved onto the next topic and you drop the smile when it seemed safe. When no one was watching. 

When you thought no one was watching. 

Which is how Bucky had come to notice the discomfort you had.

When he had first joined the team, he was very quiet. He did a lot of listening and observing, not wanting to speak much himself. That was understandable to anyone. So when you had been introduced to him and your skillset had been mentioned and you waved it off saying no big deal, he had noticed how you shifted as if you were uncomfortable and your smile dropped as soon as the attention was on someone else. 

He didn’t think much of it. If anything it had to do with being uncomfortable around him. 

But as time passed he started relaxing around everyone too, especially you. He was still accepting what he had done and who he was now. He was still reserved but he wasn’t silent. The two of you had become good friends, being two of the quieter personalities on the team. 

Now you had someone to keep you company when you stayed at the outskirts of Tony’s parties.  

But as more time went on, he noticed small things that you did. Behaviors you had, things you said. Clutch phrases. The way you would seem embarrassed when people complimented you. The way you would say that there were no worries even if you were the only reason that a mission was successful. 

Sometimes when you thought you were alone or no one would hear, he would catch you mumbling things to yourself. Things like yeah right to compliments before giving a genuine response. The slight shakes of the head in protest. The nervous habits you had when you got a compliment. The little things that others were too distracted to notice, too small to 

Bucky was an observant man. 

Which is how one night, you hadn’t realized him come into your room to talk to you about something that Bucky completely forgot about once he saw you. You were sitting down at your desk, head in your hands and rubbing your eyes. 

Jesus why am I so stupid

What the fuck is wrong with me

They don’t mean what they say

How could they like you?

I’m worthless

Just like everyone else

I don’t belong here

You were so trapped by the marathon of degrading thoughts that you hadn’t heard Bucky come in. He stood beside you, concern etched on his face. 

“Y/n?” you jumped slightly and took your hands away from your face, blinking in surprise. You had been crying. Why was he here?

“Y/n what’s wrong?” he asked, coming over to you. 

You shook your head and shrugged, wiping a few loose tears from your face. “‘M fine Buck,” you whispered, struggling to keep your emotions out of your voice.

“Y/n,” Bucky said, crouching down in front of you. “You wouldn’t be crying if something wasn’t wrong. It’s okay to be upset, there’s nothing wrong with that. Just tell me why you’re upset.”

You shook your head again. “Really Buck, I’m fine.”

“Y/n, I may not be able to read minds like Wanda, but I know something’s bothering you.it’s okay.”

You sighed, taking a breath before looking at him. “Do you guys really mean it?” you suddenly asked meekly.

Bucky drew his eyebrows together in confusion. “Mean...what?” 

“After missions, when you say I did the right thing, that I did a good job, that you guys need me - do you mean it?”

Bucky looked more puzzled now. “Yeah, of course we do. Why else would we say things like that?”

“If you thought you were supposed to.” you said suddenly. “Or if, you know, you wanted to be polite, or you thought I wanted to hear it, or you didn’t really mean it I don’t really know I -”

“Y/n, hold on, slow it down...What?” Bucky said. “Why on Earth would you think that?”

You crossed your arms and shrugged. “I dunno, I just don’t really feel like I’m all that valuable to you guys here. I don’t do anything you guys couldn’t do without me. I make so many mistakes all the time and no matter how hard I try I just don’t feel like I belong here.”

Bucky took a minute to look at you. He had known you doubted yourself but this was beyond what he had thought. To think that you, y/n, weren’t valuable to this team was a crazy idea to him

To you it was the truth.

“Y/n, no, we need you. Why on Earth would you think you don’t belong?”

“Because I haven’t earned it. I’m on the team, I fight with you guys, but I still don’t feel like I should be. The mistakes I make all the time, the wrong calls, the selfish calls, bad judgements...I could go on. I just...no matter how much good I do it doesn’t make the mistakes go away.”

“Y/n, you are one of the best people we have, we -”

“No I’m not,” you said firmly, surprising Bucky. You shook your head. “You guys don’t need me. I don’t deserve to be on this team.”

“And I do?” Bucky asked.

You looked back at him. “What do you mean? Of course you do. Your the best fighter we have, Steve's best friend, we need you.”

“But I’ve made so many mistakes. You know all of the horrible things that I’ve done y/n. I was made into a weapon.” he said.”

“Bucky you know that wasn’t your fault. You didn’t choose that and you would've done anything to stop it. That’s different. You’re a great fighter and a good person, Bucky.”

“So are you.” he stated simply. “Do you believe that?”

You took a deep breath.  “I believe you believe that. But that doesn’t mean it’s true.”

Bucky put his hands on your shoulders. “You are a fighter. A hero. You’ve saved so many people doing things that some of us couldn’t or wouldn’t do. People out there remember how you saved them. How you protected them and gave yourself to them. That was you, no one else. You are a part of this team, you help make it what it is. We would be lost without you. You put your blood, sweat, and tears into this team. You give your heart and soul to this team. You’ve earned every goddamn bit of praise you get and more. You fought your place onto this team and you deserve to be here just as much as everyone else here. So when your head tells you that you don’t belong or that we don’t need you, tell it to fuck off. Because you’re one of the best people we have.”

By now you had tears in your eyes again, but not ones of shame. Ones of appreciation and relief. You had wanted to hear those words directly for so long and to be affirmed in that way was something you needed. “Thank you Bucky,” you said softly, giving him one of your first genuine smiles at a compliment.

He squeezed your shoulder reassuringly. “Anytime. Anytime you want a reminder, you let me know. I’ll tell you as many times as you need to hear it before you can start to believe it for yourself.”

turning thirteen

a birthday fic for the three birthday boys <3

Characters: Huey Duck, Dewey Duck, Louie Duck, minor mentions of other characters

Words: 2285

Summary: April 15, 2021: The day of Huey, Dewey and Louie's thirteenth birthday.

(text under read more)

Today, Huey is 13.

He didn't really feel different. Whenever his birthday rolled around, he was excited that he was getting older, but stopped anticipating a major difference between the day before his birthday and the day of.

Turning 13 made him reflect a lot: He was finally a teenager. He'd be around that age to move up to seventh grade in a public school, except he hasn't gone to public school in three years.

These past three years, his entire perception of his family, his core beliefs, his own self, had completely flipped.

His entire life, he grew up only knowing his brothers and his Uncle Donald as his family, and he knew that Uncle Scrooge existed, but never pieced the connection until the day they met. But now, it seemed like everyday, he was finding out about a new family member and Webby's elaborate family tree was enough to give him a headache.

Ever since he joined the Junior Woodchucks back when he was seven, he seemed almost physically incapable of functioning without a Junior Woodchuck Guidebook at his disposal. He personally didn't see an issue with it as it gave him the knowledge he needed to maneuver through everyday life, especially living with a constantly adventuring and danger facing family, but he also knew that he started to become co-dependent on it even though he had more than enough knowledge now to function on his own two feet. It wasn't easy, and the book is still a huge source of comfort to him, but now he's able to distance himself from his book in times where he needs to think on his feet rather than waste time flipping through the pages of the book, waiting for an answer.

Not to mention, his final encounter kind of tainted his view of the Junior Woodchucks: He knew that Isabella Finch and the Junior Woodchucks by extension had little to nothing to do with Bradford's plans, but her insistance on bringing him to adventure is the trigger that put him and all of his loved ones in danger in the first place. The Junior Woodchucks always had a special place in his heart, and he was eagerly awaiting the day for him to give a second attempt at becoming a fellow Senior Woodchuck with Violet, but he also found himself becoming less and less excited with all of the Junior Woodchuck activities he participated in following that day. It pained him, really.

Then, his anger: This was something he never thought he would've addressed again following that one day, just mere weeks before they met Uncle Scrooge for the first time.

Uncle Donald and his brothers were always aware of his anger, but they never knew the full extent of it until that day. Whenever Huey even got the slightest bit angry, he felt himself losing his grip of control on any situation, and there was nothing scarier to him than not being in control and being able to work his way out of something with a clear mind: So he chose to hide it. He chose to bottle it up inside, no matter how much it physically drained him or how overwhelming it became, it was the only alternative in his mind.

But then he spent that day in Swanstantine with Lena, trying to concoct ways to combat Steelbeak, and he had to come to terms that tapping into his anger was the only way to get a favorable resolution on their side. So he did that: He became one with the alter ego he created in his mind to shove his anger to the further depths of his brain, one that was dubbed "The Duke of Making a Mess" thanks to Dewey trying to make light of that one time he blew up in front of his brothers and Uncle Donald, and he.... controlled it. He didn't let the unhinged nature of this anger consume him, and he was actually able to create an equilibrium between the personality he was okay with people seeing, and the personality he was more insecure about than anything. And he'd be forever grateful to Lena for that.

He grew one inch in height, not that it held any significance considering Dewey grew two inches. As long as he was still taller than Louie, who didn't seem to have grown through any significant change of height, he'd come to terms with Dewey being the tallest.

Today, Huey turned 13, and the more he thought about it, he definitely wasn't the same person he was around this time last year. Physically, he didn't feel any different, but mentally, he definitely grew from the person he was the day Uncle Donald dropped him and his brothers off at Uncle Scrooge's doorstep. And maybe that was a good enough reason to celebrate.

--

Today, Dewey is 13.

Dewey counted down the days until he would turn 13 ever since he learned how to count past ten. It was a huge milestone to him, as he was finally a teenager. But now that the day was here, it felt a bit underwhelming. Maybe he expected too much for the first day, but he didn't feel any different than how he felt the night before when he was still twelve.

He remembered he left an envelope stashed in his pillowcase, one that was designated to be opened only on his thirteenth birthday that he had written when he was nine. He scrambled through his pillowcase, praying that it hadn't slipped out and gotten lost, until his hand made contact with a piece of paper. Dewey didn't have the best memory, so he honestly had not idea what to expect when opening this letter.

He unfolded the top part of the letter, revealing the title "Dewey's To-Dew List By 13".

He fully opened the letter, and found himself tearing up when he read the first, and only thing on the checklist:

1.) Find my mom!

Growing up, his brothers were often under the impression that Della had passed away and Uncle Donald just didn't like talking about it, but Dewey always had a feeling that it wasn't the full truth. He came up with plenty of crazy conspiracies, such as her getting kidnapped by the government and kept under protection in Area 51, but all of them were somewhat comforting to him: It was better than believing that the mother you always wanted to know, was long gone.

But then his mom came back, and all of these years of having doubts and questions were subsided. He loved having his mom around, especially with how they seemed to click with each other almost instantly, and if it weren't for her influence, he never would've discovered that he enjoyed piloting as much as he did.

When the mom he spents years wondering about, and a year searching for came back, he should've felt satisfied then and there: Except he didn't.

Uncle Donald always made it blatantly clear that he loved all three of the boys the same, and would stand by them no matter what, but sometimes that reassurance wasn't enough for Dewey. He wasn't Huey, who had so many accolades under his name only by the age of ten, and he wasn't Louie, who had a personality that could charm an entire crowd of people. He was Dewey, and it took a long time for him to come to terms with that.

It took a while, but Dewey had realized that he was special, in a way that was unique to his brothers. When it came to adventures, sometimes Huey would get too caught up in trying to calculate the perfect plan, and Louie would get caught up in his anxiety, but Dewey always liked to face things head on. Maybe it wasn't the best tactic, but it was one that earned him the title of "tougher than the toughies" for a reason. His overflowing confidence in nearly all ways of life, was something that both of his brothers lacked in different ways, and that's what helped him stand out rather than blend in as "the third one".

Dewey held the letter close to his heart, reminiscing on the kid he used to be. His confidence never faded away no matter how he aged, it was a staple of his personality for as long as he remembered, and one that he cherished the most.

Today, Dewey turned 13, and he knew he was the same person: his stubborn mind and determined heart remained the same. Yet, something felt different. When he was nine years old, he never could've imagined this life for himself, especially in regards to his mom. But now, even though he'd never admit it, he could actually rest with some peace at mind: That he was good enough, that he shined in his own way, and that he had a support system that truly loved him.

---

Today, Louie is 13.

Out of his brothers, Louie would argue that he cared about this day the least. It was just another day in his mind. Sure, it was fun celebrating his birthday with his family, especially with Webby and Launchpad around who always made sure that the triplets had the funnest day possible, even if that day ended up a bit hectic.

Louie didn't see the hype with getting older: Sure, now he was less than three years away from being able to get a license, and then five years away from being a legal adult, but those were still years: Not days, not weeks, not months, years.

If you told Louie that this was what his life would be like when he turned ten, he'd straight up laugh in your face. In these past three years, he went from being a casual supporter of the Richest Duck in the World, to one of the nephews of the Richest Duck in the World. He went from only ever having Huey and Dewey as brothers, to having Webby, who was more like a sister than a cousin, and May and June by extension. He went from only ever having one parental figure, which was Uncle Donald, to having his mother who he was sure was dead, come back into his life and play an active role in it. Louie wouldn't admit it outloud, but the way his life shifted from a boring one living at the Marina with his brothers and his Uncle, to living in a Mansion with an extended family where all they do is get themselves in and out of trouble, was really exciting to him. It's something he never would've thougnt he'd have.

Especially when his mom came back. They started off on a terrible footing, with Louie being hesitant to become comfortable around her to the fallout they had over Louie and the tub time machine, which as time went on he started to realize more and more where he went wrong, and because of that, there was always an awkward tension between them. Even after all of the hugs, kisses and apologies, Louie could always tell Della felt like she had to be cautious around him. So for the first time since they first became introduced to each other, Louie took the initiative when it came to bonding with his mother: He figured they wouldn't bond over hobbies despite them being the sharpest minds in the family minus Scrooge, so he pushed for them to bond through just talking with each other, which proved to work through time.

Sure, sometimes the conversations would get dark, with Della hinting at the trauma she's obviously dealing with even now that she's been home for two years, and Louie countering her with talking about the toll adventuring has taken on him for a while. It was very rare that those conversations would actually end in tears, but they were conversations that helped Louie unload his emotional baggage of three years that sometimes he felt he couldn't even go to Huey or Dewey about: and it felt nice.

Louie would be lying if he said he didn't learn a lot about himself, because he did.

Money never came easy for Uncle Donald and the nephews.

Louie wouldn't admit this outloud, but he often admired how much Uncle Donald often put on the line just to make sure the triplets had a bed to sleep on at night. Sometimes, when Louie was younger he would sneak out to the kitchen, and get a peak on Uncle Donald panicking about whatever new bill was due that he inevitably couldn't afford at the time.

It was an image Louie could never forget.

When he came here, he was an emotionally reserved ten year old whose only sight of future, was becoming rich after only ever knowing a life of poverty and having to move almost every other month because of eviction notices. But even that sight of becoming rich became skewed due to his original lack of work ethic, seeing as it led him to end up being on watch lists in 49 different states.

But now, he was 13 years old, shadowing Scrooge on his business ventures, studying up on law, being an active participant in adventures, and letting the family he often pushed away, come in to his bubble. He was sure that the ten year old Louie that stood at Scrooge's doorstep that day, would be disgusted by the hardwork he put into everything he did now, but also proud that he was able to make it this far.

"Happy birthday, guys." Louie murmured as he slid out from the bottom bunk, getting ready for the day inevitably crazy day that was ahead.

Why Are We So In Love With Cats

Cats and also their human followers are a misunderstood lot. This I discovered when I composed "Why cats never ever became male's buddy" discussing how the recently mapped cat genome reveals that, compared with canines, residence cats are only partially tamed. The reaction on Quartz's Facebook page was legendary. The article obtained almost 1,700 remarks more than any other post on Quartz's Facebook page, ever. What triggered this outpouring? I referenced the feline stereotype frequently traded among dog people that cats are passive-aggressive and also psychologically unavailable.

On the face of it, pet people appear to be less touchy. Our short article in 2014 on pets' genetic wildness (" Quit coddling your pet dog he's 99.9% wolf") was widely read, but it sparked minimal feedback from pet dog people in any way as well as certainly no outrage.

So why do pet cat individuals come off as so darned delicate? Possibly since they are. Research studies weightgal.com do without a doubt show feline individuals often tending towards higher nervousness as well as moodiness than the pro-canine team. Current research likewise recommends animal owners with even more aberrant characteristics are additionally inclined to feel more anxiety regarding their animals' sensations towards them. Whether consciously or otherwise, both media as well as society appear to love to massage this insecurity in.

Yet many in the pro-cat camp suggest that the bond they show to their felines transcends to what pet dog individuals experience with their pets:

Sounds quite bitter, possibly. But on this point, at the very least, the pet cat people are not as crazy as the stereotype maintains. Their animal of selection has actually greatly stood up to the human meddling that has actually in some way hewn chihuahuas as well as whippets from the genetics of wolves indicating: cats simply aren't programmed to please individuals the way pets are. And also this might explain why feline people seem to have an extremely deep bond with their animals.

Meowing martyrs

This disliking on felines thing it isn't all that original. The pomposity's real leader was Pope Gregory IX, who declared in 1233 that during Satanic masses, the Devil took the form of a black pet cat.

Throughout Europe edumattress.com , the Catholic Church tortured as well as carried out pet cat proprietors for witchery. Considering that having pet cats could obtain you burned at the stake, individuals started slaughtering residential felines a fad worsened by the false impression that pet cats triggered the Black Fatality

, which started ruining the continent in the mid-1300s. Europe's entire domestic feline population was really nearly erased, and also lots of 10s of countless "witches" were burned at the stake over the following 400 years.

It wasn't simply Catholics who had it in for felines, though; Queen Elizabeth I's crowning celebrations consisted of melting a cat active (so joyful!). To today, cats withstand torture as well as persecution that just doesn't seem to take place to dogs. For instance, individuals could claim this concerning certain pet dog types pit bulls or poodles, state yet not about pets as a whole:

Canines, the people-pleasers

Against that backdrop, it's not actually all that surprising that cat individuals may be tired of combating the dominating knowledge that pet dogs are a lot more charitable of spirit than felines. And also, scientifically speaking, this bias is unfair. Recall that canine genetics have been shuffled around for centuries to suit human requirements. While people throughout the ages were melting and also brutalizing cats, pet dogs were by their sides bring ducks, going after foxes, and also eliminating Attila the Hun's enemies, among others of the abilities they were reproduced for.

This brings us back to the development issue. Once again, house felines are mainly an item of all-natural, as well as not man-made, choice they trained themselves, you could say.

Dogs, not so much. Starting between 11,000 and also 16,000 years earlier, when pet dogs were first trained from old wolves, they have actually been bred to please individuals. The convenience with which people can reproduce them likewise suggests that human beings have selected for genes that make pet dogs extra appealing to them as well as not just for skills, however likewise for aesthetics as well as individuality avantsuccess.com .

That lack of enigma might have something to do with why Hollywood, the media as well as the basic population is extra likely to relate to dogs than pet cats, notes Mikel Delgado, a researcher at the University of California, Berkeley as well as an expert cat actions specialist.

" I assume part of the [media prejudice] is because pet cats are less transparent to us they show up to have less facial expression," she states. Canines, comparative, are thought to act on their whims as well as conveniently mirror what appear to human beings to be familiar feelings. Yet pets have probably been reproduced for these traits, states Delgado. "They were fed since they can wrinkle their eyebrows, and also we bred them additionally to mirror our own expressions," she states.

The feline aura

Extra intriguing, however, is what turned up in the comments section at the end of Delgado and also Reevy's survey, in which pet dog owners of both types might mention on their pet of selection. Cat people rhapsodized regarding their cat's uniqueness, composing points like "my feline is the smartest." Canine proprietors, on the other hand, often tended either to celebrate their animal's obedience or make general statements concerning all pet dogs (e.g. "I love pets" or "pets are sweet!"), states Delgado.

The Facebook remark string lends even more proof to the pet cat part of that phenomenon. Dolly, Boris, Buddi, Cuddles, Snowy, Salem, Isis, George Hubert, and Noodle are amongst hundreds of other felines applauded in occasionally TMI-levels of information.

This makes good sense. Pet cats' freedom, absence of openness, and also self-sufficiency implies when individuals ultimately reach harmony with their kitty, they have actually overcome massive all-natural obstacles to develop a bond of mutual respect.

Why do we enjoy cats so much?

We're all cat lovers. That's why we're right here. But have you ever quit to wonder why we locate felines so amazing loveable?

With Valentine's Day just nearby, it seemed the perfect time to explore our attraction with our self-domesticated feline pals.

A few of that innate love could be instinct, based upon felines' one-of-a-kind facial functions manjacompany.com .

Konrad Loren z, that likewise uncovered the concept of inscribing, thought that human beings are drawn to baby-like features, such as large eyes. Because cats have reasonably big eyes symmetrical to their faces, also when grown, we feel an instinctual protectiveness over them.

The response can also depend on just how felines domesticated themselves. Unlike pets, that were bred from wild wolves to be searching tools as well as family members friends, pet cats most likely complied with human beings because that's where the victim was. Throughout background, any place people went, vermin followed, providing an enough food resource. Fast forward hundreds of years and cats have identified that humans will certainly provide sanctuary, safety and security, and food, without all the initiative.

That's one of the reasons it's so vital to have fun with your cat. He has strong hunting reactions that require exercising. Even if he seems material to sleep throughout the day, he actually needs an opportunity to show off his skill at pouncing, chasing, and scratching. Even simply a few mins a day with a wand plaything, like our Wiggly Stick can maintain kitty feeling frisky and also engaged.

There's likewise proof felines see us as part of their "litter," utilizing vocative sounds like mews and also chittering to attract our interest a habits that's just utilized between mommy pet cats as well as their kitties in the wild. Recognizing your cat sees you as an equal is certainly reason to dole out the love.

One more piece of the problem might lie in a pet cat's unique purrs, which they make use of to calm themselves when they're worried or to share satisfaction. Proof even reveals that a cat's purr can heal both pet cats and also humans alike. As well as there's absolutely nothing like a pleased purring cat in your lap.

It's likewise likely that several of us find pet cats to be a challenge, and that's why we discover them so appealing. Unlike pets, pet cats typically just reveal affection on their terms. So when they do finally show how much they like and depend upon us, it seems that a lot more satisfying.

If you're a meme lover, you could adore cats due to the fact that they are "made of liquid" or since "if I fits, I sits" seems to be their concept. Felines can fit in almost any container. In tight spaces, whiskers help them figure out if the area allows sufficient for their body. Yet likewise, pet cats love a basic cardboard box or a play tunnel like our very own Hide and also Sneak.

In all honesty, though, it's most likely the toe beans. Have you seen the tiny cute pads on the bottoms of their feet? Exactly how can you not enjoy an animal with such lovable toes?

TW: GUNS, VIOLENCE

CONTEXT: so this is from a mafia AU created by Cal in a haikyuu discord server we’re in. it’s copied word for word from my messages a few weeks ago, so apologies for chaotic grammar and such; it had kinda possessed me and i had to write it immediately at like 1 in the morning (´∀｀；)

HI I'D LIKE TO EXPLAIN WHY IN MAFIA AU IT MAKES PERFECT SENSE THAT KAGEYAMA WOULD BE MOST SUITABLE TO WORK PRIMARILY WITH GUNS IN COMBAT AND THE OTHERS WOULD HAVE TO WORK 100x HARDER TO GET ANYWHERE NEAR THE SAME CONSISTENT LEVEL IN COMBAT

ALSO THIS IS COMING FROM SOMEONE WITH A COMBAT VET FATHER AND SOMEONE WHO SHOOTS RECREATIONALLY AND IS BASIC-TRAINED FOR SELF DEFENSE IN IT

OKAY SO

I work with 12 round clips for a handgun and 6 rounds for my revolver. I can shoot 2 different kinds ammo efficiently and one kind for the time span of one clip with little accuracy because of my own issues. So, I'm basing everything on what Kageyama would likely use in combat from that personal working knowledge, knowledge on other kinds of ammo, gun builds, etc, and how he canonically operates as a person and on the court

(can u tell this is gonna be a novel yet?)

Let's walk through why all of them could shoot just fine recreationally or very occasional combat shall we?

To shoot recreationally, you have time to think, aim, prepare for kickback and sound, re-aim (in some cases like Tsukki and Hinata) and then shoot. All of this in a safe environment with no threat present

The big points there are safe environment and time

As for very occasionally in combat, they would have to work off of pure adrenaline and their recreational experience.

Hinata is likely to miss because there's too much danger on too many sides and he's not one to look behind himself before attacking. He focuses straight ahead. this is a problem when it comes to an enemy/ally causing a collision/unexpected interruption and Hinata isn't ready to fire at his target yet without risk to others. 

He could only use it in the combat scenario of a one on one with the element of surprise in his favor

Yamaguchi is known for his anxiety. He's also known for slight impulsivity (following Tsukki despite the guy basically insulting both the bullies and yams, and also being known for being a dick even that young; snapping at Tsukki multiple times in scenarios that's it not appropriate for despite it's effectiveness, and it's clear at the Fukurodani camp he hadn't meant to be so abrupt). He's the type to misfire out of panic, and also not practice proper procedure because he wasn't raised/didn't practice enough specific procedure to have it drilled in that you don't have your finger touching the trigger until you're ready to shoot. He's also the type to miss from shaking, and get hurt by the kick. 

He can only use a .22 caliber revolver in a situation he's prepared to use it in with weeks of consistent advanced practice.

(revolvers only have 6 rounds, for those who don't know! so less chances if he messes up!)

Tsukishima has the opposite problem of Yamaguchi. He's anxious and insecure in his abilities, leading him to get stuck in his head. Which is NOT SOMETHING YOU WANT. He's the type to not want unnecessary casualty of avoidable because he believes it reflects on his performance overall. He would also want to get the perfect shot the first try, and go over every single thing he's doing in the moment with his body in an attempt to do so. This distractedness leads to being an easy target for a quick draw or someone to come up behind. He's also not going to like the bang (he canonically complains about team volume several times, and is seen wearing his headphones after a few of those moments which implies it bothers him enough to block it out entirely), so he'll be too busy bracing for it to actually make sure he's re-aimed when he inevitably drifted from the target. 

He can only use a .22 caliber handgun in a spur of the moment situation where he is not given the ability to think through his behavior and is forced to shoot on sight, with the help of muscle memory built from rec practice and contests against the others.

Now, what makes Kageyama so perfect? Isn't he considered impulsive and over-analytical like the others?

Well, yes and no.

And here's why

Kageyama's behavior during a game vs. practice/every day life are similar, but fundamentally different when looking at it for this situation.

Kags in a game isn't going to be stuck in his head constantly focusing on everyone and everything like Tsukishima is, and he isn't going to be doubting himself the way Tsukishima and Yamaguchi do when put in the spotlight. And he doesn't have to heavily rely on anyone to begin his process, unlike like the attackers, like Hinata. He's the one setting up the attack; he's the one majorly accountable for the end product of the set+attack. And it's been that way forever as far as we've seen. And as a setter, he has to take note of everyone and everything around him to make an informed decision in seconds while still knowing and being able to rely on the others to uphold their part and back him up if necessary. 

Kageyama is used to being the center of attention for his capabilities, and is confident and assured in them; all while still being mindful of how he independently operates compared and in tandem to those around him.

So why does this make him perfect in a specific combat way in a little more clear detail?

When you're in a fight involving guns, those with guns are going to be the center of attention, 9/10 times. No matter how many people are holding a gun in any given situation, Kageyama will always be a piece of center attention. And he's prepared to do so from years of conditioning through his own history pre-Karasuno (likely growing up, instilling a sense of instincts and natural prowess from being taught so young the rules to guns, the operations, when and when not to draw it, etc.). As well being used as a very key combat piece in missions; he's going to be the main one of the 4 to go out on close combat missions (not necessarily hand to hand, any kind of close range is up for grabs) and still in top 3-5 for sniper/long distance missions beneath Noya. He doesn't need the time to think anymore like Tsukishima has a habit of doing. He doesn't need to second guess because he's been taught from day one that, that is what will you get killed. Hesitation in gun combat is lethal, always and forever. He doesn't need to rush because he's able to adapt (with some personal work on team building skills) and he doesn't have that panic when he's been doing this kind of thing for so long. 

Kageyama was born and raised with lessons on this stuff, and he was immersed in recreational and self defense training since he was basically a toddler. With time and some effort, those skills have naturally evolved in his favor, and can flourish and bloom with the proper exercise and new skill-building.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk

𝕄𝕒𝕥𝕔𝕙 𝕌𝕡♡

Hi! Can I have a male KNB matchup? She/Her. I have a small body and even smaller chest which I used to be fine with but now frustrates me. My butt makes up for it though. I also have wide hips so even though I’m skinny I still have some shape which could pass off as slim-sexy.

I’m introverted and reserved. I prefer to spend time by myself just reading. To most, I’m unassuming, shy, and incapable of carrying myself out there or doing assigned task. That’s because I’m easily flustered and embarrassed. It’s not like I can’t talk to guys at all, but I’m very conscious of them particularly if it’s someone I like. I’m not a pushover though. I’m actually very unlike what outsiders think of me as (kind & sweet). Although I’m those things too, I’m really a strong-headed person and very opinionated. I’m not one to take shit from anybody. I try to hold my feelings in for the sake of others, but I’m not a patient person by any means. So I say what’s on my mind, not often guilty that it makes me seem like a warfreak or disrespectful. I don’t give chances easily. I don’t trust someone again who committed a serious mistake knowing that once that person has done it once, he could do it again.

I’m a harsh critique on a variety of things like fictions, arts, movies. I don’t like wasting time by lingering on badly written/drawn ones. I’m also a harsh judge of people. Maybe because I have inferiority complex that’s why sometimes I can’t help but bring people down. I’m a selfish and spiteful person. Sometimes I’m incorrigible to the point that I toy around with people if they pissed me off enough. Maybe it’s because I’ve always felt like I don’t matter as much simply because I’m younger than everybody which makes me act out. You could say I’m the black sheep of the family. I feel like I’m not good enough and I’m so bothered that I haven’t accomplished anything at all in life. I’m jealous of other people when they’re better than I am. I think of myself as a dark person due to my personality and my thoughts. I have lots of insecurities and could really get in a slump for weeks. I can’t talk to anybody about these things which is why I get depressed and lonely sometimes.

I’m lazy and sloppy and disorganized, but when I put my mind to it I’m actually a harder worker than anybody which makes me happy when I get acknowledgement for it. I’m quite ambitious. On good days, I’m quite normal and actually amenable and pleasant. My dad and I are often not on good terms, but I’m happy when I get to spend some time with my other family members since those moments are rare. I get happy when I get to buy a good book, or a notebook because I keep a diary and also write a few things. I like survival games. I can be an airhead most of the time.

When it comes to my sexuality, I’m into guys but I admit I’ve admired a woman’s body and have fantasized about women too. But it’s all physical attraction since I’ve never liked a female romantically. I crush on guys easily. I’m drawn to bad boys (both the street-smart a**holes and the calculating, manipulative ones), but I also like cold and brooding tsundere guys. Romance is good too but I’m a closet pervert and quite adventurous with these things that’s why I prefer someone who’s dominating, a little arrogant (as long as they have something to be arrogant for) and can make me feel desirable.

I hope that’s okay and thank you!

»»————-　♡　————-««

Hello sweetie~! Thanks so much for requesting with us and I hope you’re doing okay~! I can most definitely do this match-up for you~! I hope you enjoy who I’ve paired you with~!

» » Admin Ko

𝕀 𝕊𝕙𝕚𝕡 𝕐𝕆𝕌 𝕨𝕚𝕥𝕙…

ʜɪᴍᴜʀᴏ ᴛᴀᴛꜱᴜʏᴀ

Quiet and reserved, Himuro mixes well with your introverted self. He has a decent understanding of how you think and feel when it comes to crowds of people, and enjoys the simple times with one’s self. Despite the assumptions of being shy with a lack of spark in initial meetings, Himuro has a knack for picking out individuals who aren’t exactly who they may seem to be from first glance.

He finds it endearing how you can be flustered and easily embarrassed when talking to someone of interest. Though of course he won’t admit it, but he does tend to get a tad jealous when your attention is anywhere but on him. As stated previously, Himuro has a knack for having a keen sense for the unexpected attitudes from people, and isn’t all too surprised to see the strong and opinionated person that comes forth from you. If anything, he’s able to combat that in his own calm and factual self. Though make no mistake, he can be wound up tightly in his own emotions as well.

With opinions and ideals, he’ll listen to what you have to say with respect, even if he happens to not agree with them, but there may be times where ideals and opinions clash and collide. Though of course a proper sit down and calm talk with one another will usually alleviate the situation. When it comes to mistakes, or wrong doings, Himuro-- in a sense-- is similar to you. Mainly in aspects of having a hard time trusting others, but being a touch more lenient on giving a second chance.

After all, he knows that individuals can gradually change and learn from their mistakes through time. Especially after witnessing the GoM being brought back to reality. As for critiquing works, Himuro is very much similar to you in those aspects. He won’t waste time on anything that doesn’t have a good or well developed plot with nicely written characters, but tends to hold back on judging others. Mainly because he understands that not all can achieve perfection on the first try.

With that, he tries to help ease and work with your inferiority complex. With his manipulative and cunning tactics, he’ll most definitely weave emotions into his facts that he gives you in hopes of helping you understand that there’s no point in bringing others down, when so many can help bring you up. He personally dislikes the toying of other people; mainly because it reminds him of his own past and others that he’s met while playing basketball, and doesn’t want you to be painted as a villain in others’ eyes. 

It’s without a doubt that Himuro will constantly be complimenting you or giving you genuine compliments in hopes of helping your self hate. The destruction and pain of that path being familiar to him, and he doesn’t want you to fall even further into it.

As for affection, he can be a bit of a taunting asshole. He most definitely enjoys seeing you riled up, and doesn’t mind indulging in giving you the affection you desire. Though a majority of the time, he can be a touch aloof and nonchalant when you try to gain his attention. Though trust he won’t really let you out of his sight. He’s more than clever enough to keep a game of cat and mouse going for as long as he’d like. 

CAPRICORN: You’re allowed to get your hopes up for this upcoming year. I know that you’ve done this before, have looked to the future with rose colored glasses and said “it’s going to be better, I’m going to be better” only to become bogged down by reality, but you have to keep trying. You have to keep wishing. You have to keep embracing the world and all it has to offer you, or else you’ll find yourself alone at the end of the day, praying for a redo that’s impossible to attain. And if things don’t go as planned, that’s okay too. There’s always another day to wake up for. AQUARIUS: Stop shoving all of your needs onto the bottom of your priority list to be picked through at a later date. It’s only natural to have desires, both necessary and not, and 2018 should be the year where you stop punishing yourself for that. There are good things on the rise for you, and you shouldn’t let anything or anyone stand in your way: especially if the obstruction in question is self imposed. Make a playlist of songs that make you happy and dance until your heart feels ready to jump out of your chest. Unleash all of the joy you’ve been stockpiling inside of you. PISCES: You don’t have to be the best at everything you do in order for it to be meaningful. It’s easier to judge your accomplishments based upon those that came before you, or those that have had more experience, than it is to ignore them. Instead of comparing yourself to people like that, compare yourself to who you were last year, or who you were last month. “Am I better than I used to be?” is the only question that you should be asking yourself when tackling new projects, and new frames of thinking. This should be a year of focusing on yourself, and your growth. ARIES: Allow yourself to make mistakes without beating yourself up over them for years to come. There isn’t a person alive that exists without regret of any kind, and you should remember that fact whenever you look around and think that everyone is doing so much better than you are. It’s okay to step into the light, where others can see you, and admit to the nightmares you refuse to name. Nobody is expecting you to be brave or invincible all of the time. Let this year be the one where you refuse to feel guilty for your emotions. TAURUS: It’s time that you stop giving so much of yourself to people that don’t or can’t reciprocate. There’s no reason to settle for relationships that make you feel anything other than warm, and safe. I know that sometimes it feels like this is all you’re ever going to get, that stale friendships and discarded lovers are what’s available to you and all you have to choose from, but that isn’t true. Make this the year the one where you come to terms with your self worth, and realize that you deserve better. GEMINI: Change, for you, is a lot like swallowing cough syrup. You’ll do it if you have to, and you’ll put it off as long as possible, but it’s never something that you put in your coffee mug and look forward to drinking. But at the end of the day change, if handled correctly, is a good thing. You aren’t any happier than you used to be because everything’s remained stagnant, and while that isn’t completely your fault you have the means to make it somewhat better, and easier. Instead of asking yourself why the world has been so unkind to you, ask yourself what you can learn from it. CANCER: It’s human nature to want comfort in the form of another’s presence, but that shouldn’t be your primary focus for this upcoming year. I know that you love love, and you’re always searching for more of it in friends and family and the things you create, and that’s okay. It’s a beautiful part of your personality. But self love is just as important as love that extends outwards, and pushing it aside does more harm than good in the long run. You aren’t going to be alone forever, but if you’re alone for right now you don’t need to be scared of it. Don’t run away, this time. LEO: Keep feeding your momentum as this year progresses. You have a tendency to start out strong when pursuing something new, and then peter into casual disinterest once the smallest roadblock appears in your path. Find a direction, and a compass, and don’t let yourself lose focus of where you want to be. There’s a future out there in which you’re happy… a future where you don’t go to bed crying over the people that don’t know how to love you, and it’s attainable as long as you still want it. And you do want it, don’t you? VIRGO: Let go of your heavy heart as you enter this new year. A lot of anniversaries are coming up, some good and some bad, and it’ll be easier to push through them if you’re unburdened by the things you’re unable to change. Get rid of the ghosts and the insecurities, this month. Forget those that forgot about you. Begin asking yourself the questions you’ve been setting aside for a later date. Close the book, if it’s all said and done. You have so much to give people, and to bring to the world: don’t let your self doubt detract from that. LIBRA: Sometimes a metaphorical blank slate is just the thing you need in order to throw yourself back into living. While you’ve never been one for holidays, organizing and reevaluating is something that’s part of your wheelhouse. Make a list of goals to accomplish, not necessarily resolutions, and try your best to stick to them. It’s easy to forget how much of a relief it is to follow through with something when you haven’t in a while. So remind yourself. Push when you can. You’re much more flexible than you let yourself believe you are. SCORPIO: You’re very good at hiding underneath your skin, pretending that you don’t pick at old wounds and that you don’t want to smash every mirror in your home to pieces. But this year I want you to ask yourself why. Why are you concealing yourself from those that love you? Why aren’t you asking for the help that you need? Why do you feel as though you have to be perfect in order to be good? There’s nothing wrong with needing something to change and not knowing how to put it into action. You’re only human. Treat yourself as such. SAGITTARIUS: There’s still a voice in your head that likes to tell you that you’ll never amount to anything, and while most of the time you’re able to tune it out, sometimes you think it’s right -- that you’ll always wear your past like a coat, and you won’t ever be able to settle down. You can’t listen to that. Positive thinking has never been something you’ve thought necessary to combat this, but there’s nothing wrong with giving it a try. As silly as it may sound, make a list of reminders for yourself. “I am worthy. I am brave. I am trying my best.” Don’t let the tiny voice win, this year.

JANUARY HOROSCOPES // written by Caitlin Conlon

1-40 + all of the ones after.

(Yo, I’m actually gonna murder you…but thank you.)

1. Do you have a good relationship with your parents?- Uh, well I’ve never really looked up to my dad… he’s always been rough, if you will. I love my mom though! She’s the most important woman in my life.

2. Why did you last say “I love you to”?- I say it at least 100 times a day to many people! Bakugou maybe? 

3. Do you regret anything?- Many actually! Mostly things from my childhood, wishing I did things when I didn’t.

4. Are you insecure?- All my life I have been. But I promise that I’m really working hard to overcome my self doubt, and other insecurities!

5. What is your relationship status?- Uh… I’m not sure how Bakugou labels it, but yeah! I guess I’m taken.

6. How do you want to die? (jesus lmao)- I guess I haven’t put too much thought into it… It’s kind of scary to think about it! Hmm… I wanna die protecting those in need. As a hero! 

7. What did you last eat?- Chicken nuggets and clementines with Denki and Sero.

8. Played any sports?- I grew up playing baseball and soccer, but I always got kicked off the teams actually…

9. Do you bite your nails?- Honestly my nails get so jacked up just by training/practicing, that there aren’t any to bite!

10. When was your last physical fight?- Yesterday? Aizawa-Sensei always has us sparring with each other.

11. Do you like someone?- Angry Blond Pomeranian.

12. Have you ever stayed up for 48+ hours?- I have, and it killed me. I felt so sluggish! I really enjoy my sleep.

13. Do you hate anyone at the moment?- HELL NO! I try my best to be kind to everyone, I know what it’s like to be shunned away, and I don’t want others to feel like that ever.

14. Do you miss someone?- My mom. Been away at the dorms for quite some time now!

15. Have any pets? - At home we have a dog! He’s a rottweiler/pitbull mix, and I love him. I used to have a turtle, too.

16. How exactly are you feeling at the moment?- I guess kinda of neutral? Not overly happy, not necessarily sad either! Content.

17. Ever made out in the bathroom?- No I have not!

18. Are you scared of spiders?- I’m actually not! I think they’re kind of cute… Though Denki is terrified of them! So sometimes I’ll show him, and he screams so loud.

19. Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?- I would. I’d love to be able to tell my younger self a few choice words, and give him a hug.

20. Where was the last place you kissed someone?- In my dorm room.

21. What are your plans for this weekend?- I’m trying to get the squad to watch some movies, or maybe even go to the mall! Though, we’ll probably just play Smash Bros like we have been.

22. Do you want to have kids? How many?- Uh, yikes. I don’t know, really! I don’t think I’d be a great dad. Maybe one or two, but I’m happy with just dogs too!

23. Do you have piercings? How many?- Everyone in the squad actually has a couple of matching earrings! I’d love to get some more though.

24. What’s my best subject?- I’m pretty good at science! That and lunch.

25. Do you miss anyone from your past?- My dad.

26. What are you craving right now?- Bro some chocolate pie….

27. Have you ever broken someone’s heart?- I really hope not!

28. Have you ever been cheated on?- Not that I know of… I hope not, at least.

29. Have you ever made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?- Happy tears, love. Happy tears.

30. What’s irritating you right now?- My English grade.

31. Does somebody love you?- I’d like to think many people do! I give out a lot of love, and I surely feel loved in return.

32. What is your favorite color?- Hmm I don’t know, take a guess!

33. Do you have trust issues?- Not really I think. I’m pretty trusting, which I know can get me hurt, and has before! But, the people around me, I trust them all with my life.

34. Who/What was your last dream about?- It was a nightmare… I uh, I don’t know, just some bad things happened and I remember it really scaring me.

35. Who was the last person you cried in front of?- Bakugou.

36. Do you give out second chances too easily?- Maybe. I want everyone to get the chance to be their best.

37. Is it easier to forgive or forget?- I think it’s easier to forgive, but not forget what happened. 

38. Is this year the best year of your life?- Though many shitty/scary things happened this year, it by FAR has been the best year of my life! I’ve gained so many new friends, who I love so much. I’ve also gotten A LOT stronger, as well as everyone else.

39. How old were you when you had your first kiss?- 14!

40. Have you ever walked outside completely naked?- Listen… It was a DARE! I can’t back down from dares! That’s not manly. (I made Denki and Sero do it too).

FOR SOME REASON THESE ASKS CUT OUT NUMBERS 41-50?!

51: Favorite food?- Meat me bro. Always meat. Beef. Chicken. YAW!

52. Do you believe everything happens for a reason?- Yes I do. Everything turns out okay, eventually. It’s just a matter of when.

53. What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?- Kissed my boyfriend and said “Good night”.

54. Is cheating ever okay?- In a relationship? HELL NO! On some quizzes/tests/homework…. maybe a little… BUT STILL YOU SHOULDN’T!

55. Are you mean?- I don’t think so… I really try not to be, like I’ve said!

56. How many people have you fist fought?- Well, with my quirk, I’m close combat. So the answer is MANY. A lot! 

57. Do you believe in true love? _ I do, yes. There’s somebody perfect out there for everyone, I believe that.

58. Favorite weather?- Not too hot, not too cold… Fall? Early fall.

59. Do you like the snow?- BRO DO I EVER! It’s so pretty! Sledding, snowball fights, it’s a great time. 

60. Do you wanna get married?- I would love to someday! I want to be able to love that one person for my entire life.

61. Is it cute when a boy/girl call you baby?- As a term of endearment, I don’t mind it I guess… But if it’s an insult, no. 

62. What makes you happy?- My classmates. I truly treasure them all so much, I never want to lose any of them. They bring me up, and motivate me.

63. Would you change your name?- No, I really like my name! Kirishima, it’s my mom’s maiden name. I love it.

64. Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? (I’m sorry what?)- I mean, sometimes my pointy teeth get in the way… if that’s what you’re asking?

65. Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?- Well Mina digs chicks, so…. That’s cool!

66. Do you have a best friend of the opposite sex who you can completely be yourself around? - M I N A !!! A S H I D O !!! ALIEN QUEEN!

67. Who was the last person of the opposite sex that you talked to?- Uraraka! We talked this morning while eating breakfast together. It was a nice chat.

68. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?- Bakugou. Sometimes when I get a little down on myself, he notices, and we’ll have a chat. I value those conversations, a lot. 

69. (haha). Do you believe in soulmates?- Just like true love, I also believe in soulmates. There’s somebody crafted perfectly just for you.

70! (FUCKIN HALLELUJAH!) Is there anyone you would die for?- I, EIJIROU KIRISHIMA WOULD GLADLY DIE FOR ALL OF MY FRIENDS, TEACHERS, SUPERIORS, MOTHER, CITIZENS, ETC! If it meant they were happy, alive, and healthy. 

Androids {Lab Rats Elite Force-Chase Davenport}

Requested by Anon: Hi, I just started watching lab rats elite force and noticed there is an episode about chase building some robotic girls and kaz taking them away so my question is, could you write an imagine about you liking chase and being part of that particular episode?

Pairing: Chase Davenport X Reader

Gender: Female

Warnings: Like two swears, and a bit of insecurity and self-doubt, is that a warning?

Words: 1.8K

A/N: Really hope you like it Anon!

You exited the Hyperlift in the penthouse, stepping into mission command to see Chase messing around with an android. You came down here to practice bit since you weren't bionic or a superhero you needed to stay in tip-top condition. You were a weapons expert and excellent in hand-to-hand combat and because of this you were recruited by Davenport. Actually, funny story about how you came to be with the Elite Force.

Before saving the world, or at least Centium City for now, you used to be the "bad guy", sneaking into places and stealing things for others. And once you snuck into one of Davenport's facilities and he caught you. He was pretty impressed with your skills that he gave you an ultimatum, he could turn you over to the authorities or join his team and become a hero. And since you didn’t want to go to jail, you chose to the other option and so he introduced you to the Elite Force.

When the others first met you, Kaz and Oliver were the first to accept you, Skylar and Bree followed soon after when they saw what you could do. Chase took a while to warm up to you, admitting that he didn't think you had what it took to be a part of their team. But when you saved his ass and proved him wrong, he officially saw you as one of their own. And as time passed, you kind of developed a massive crush on Chase but of course you'd never have the guts to tell him.

You left Chase alone, not even making your presence known as you went into another room to practice. You practice for a couple hours before coming out of the room, once again finding Chase messing with the android. Except now it was fully done and resembled a human girl you almost thought it was an actual girl.

"What're you doing?" You asked.

Chase jumped at the sound of your voice having been to concentrated in his female robot. "God, don't sneak up on me like that. Anyway, this is Christina my new girlfriend."

You gave him a confused look with a flash of hurt running through your eyes. It upset you that he resorted to creating a girlfriend especially since he could get any girl. Of course he wouldn't want you as his girlfriend but he could still get any girl. Not wanting to deal with what he was doing you decided to leave instead, and just as you were going up Kaz was coming down.

You came up to find Skylar and Bree talking, Skylar holding was looked to be some sort of cheese grater.

"Hey guys, what're you doing?" You asked.

"Hey {Name}, Skylar is about to go do something gross and you and I are going out," Bree said.

You shrugged your shoulders and agreed to it, Bree linking her with yours and guiding you out of the penthouse. It was a good distraction from what happened earlier and a great opportunity to get some new clothes or whatever.

When you got back home, the two of you discovered that Skylar returned to her planet through Oliver. She had left a video message telling all of you goodbye but it just didn’t seem right. Skylar hadn't mentioned anything about wanting to return, why would she leave now? And you were right, she didn't leave, she was kidnapped by Scarlett. So the three of you made your way to Caldera to save Skylar and bring her home.

Those plans didn’t go according, after arriving you ran into Scarlett who told you where she was keeping Skylar. And then Bree took her out before the three of you left to get Skylar, it all seemed like an easy win. Of course it was not, that's just what Scarlett wanted you to think because soon after finding Skylar you were knocked out. And when you came to, you three were locked in the cage Skylar was in. You were all really in trouble now.

Skylar was given an ultimatum, she could save you, Bree, and Oliver but she'd have to join the opposition or she could watch you three die. Obviously she wouldn’t never let anything happen to the three of you, no matter how much you'd hate it, so she chose to join Scarlett and the opposition.

And after Scarlett was letting you guys go home, the three of you took the opportunity to fight her instead. Which ended up with the four of you in a cage hanging over a pit of lava, great death by lava. And the worst part is that you never got to tell Chase that you like him, although you probably wouldn't have told him anyway. But it was still nice to know that you had time to do so, if you ever built the courage.

"Wait Bree, can’t you use one of your bionic abilities?" Oliver asked.

"I have super speed, vocal manipulation, and an invisibility app, which one of these do you think is going to help us," She said.

"I bet that bionic attitude might help," He retorted, matching the attitude she used. "What about you {Name}, did you bring anything that could pick a lock."

"I specialize in human technology not alien," You said, eyeing the lock on the cage.

"Again, that attitude might help," He replied.

You rolled your eyes at him but he was right, arguing wasn't the best option right now. However, you didn’t have to worry for long as Kaz and Chase showed up shortly after, just in time to stop Scarlett from lowering the cage. Kaz dealt with Scarlett while Chase worked on getting you put of the cage. Bree ended up knocking Scarlett out again, surprising Chase and Kaz that she had superpowers.

Scarlett ended up being taken by girls which you figured were all androids when you spotted Christina amongst them. Perfect Christina, created by Chase to be his girlfriend because who knows why. Were you jealous of an android? Most definitely!

Scarlett ended up creating her own demise because of her hatred towards mankind, she ended up falling into the lava pit. And like always you all ended up home safe and sound. Kaz left with the androids, said he was going to video chat his mom. You, on the other hand, decided you needed some alone time and went out onto the terrace. Not long after, Chase joined you outside, sitting across from you.

"You okay?" He asked.

"Yeah..." You lied or at least tried to. "No, I'm not actually."

"What's up?" He asked once more, his attention fully on you.

"You, you’re what's up! Why would you need seven android girlfriends? Why would you even need one android girlfriend!?" You exclaimed, letting all your pent-up rage out. "God, can’t you see how much I like you!"

You slapped a hand over your mouth after realizing what you said, your eyes widening in utter shock and humiliation. You watched Chase's reaction, his eyes widened and his lips parted in surprise. Oh boy, did you mess up here, god, you probably just ruined your friendship with him. You tried getting up to leave, your plan was to now avoid Chase at all cost, but he stopped you. Oh god, he was probably about to let you down gently, telling you all your great qualities and then saying he was the two of you as nothing more than friends. But you interrupted him before he could even start talking, saying the words for him.

"I-I-I'm so sorry, god you so hate me right now don’t you. A-And I know what you're going to say, we're nothing more than friends. I'm sorry, I just can't believe I actually said that, this is so mortifying. Oh god, I'm just-I'm just going to leave now," You were practically on the brink of tears and wanted nothing more than to just leave.

As you got up, you failed to hear Chase calling after you, trying to stop you. What he was going to say was the complete opposite of that but you stopped him before he could. But before you could go back inside Chase stopped you, grabbing your wrist and spinning you into him. Though without meaning to, his lips landed on yours, shocking the both of you but neither pulling away. Your arms wrapped themselves around his neck and his around your waist. Instead he actually brought you closer, letting the kiss tell you everything he wanted to say before.

It seemed like forever before the two of you pulled away for air, the kiss had left you feeling a little hazy.

"What I was going to say is that I actually like you too. And I made an android girlfriend in hopes to get you to notice or to lessen my feelings for you. I wished you would have told me earlier," He said.

"I...I didn’t actually think you'd like me back," You whispered looking down.

"Well you were wrong, seriously why wouldn’t you think I liked you?" He asked.

"Because, it took you like three weeks to accept as part of the team, why would you see me as anything more than a teammate?" You replied.

"I would because you're amazing, funny, and you can kick some serious ass. I mean seriously, you took Roman and Riker down faster than any of us could. And not to mention, you're incredibly smart, I mean not as smart as me of course. But you are an amazing person," He said, using one of the hands around your waist to lift your chin up so you were looking straight at him.

You couldn't help but smile at his words, he had a way with words. You pulled him closer and laid your head on his chest, taking his words in and enjoying the moment.

Word Ministration

¶ Topic: "Why does God allow people to susuffer and die if He's a God of love and mercy"?

By. Pastor. Calvin Nii Bannerman

🔥

One day, war broke out in heaven, combat erupted in paradise . Armies of Angels lined up for a dramatic showdown . What happened during that heavenly battle would change the course of human history . It shows us what God is all about - and what life is all about.

The book of Revelation describes this battle it tells about it in clear terms , it tells us something that is impossible to believe . It tells us War Broke out in heaven. Someone will say how but the bible records it did happen in Revelation 12: 7-12

During this period you and I will examine the facts (bible ) and reveal the answers that will prove to you that God does EXIST and He's truly an ALMIGHTY Being and He's a God of untold Mercy and He truly love and care about every person on this earth.

Revelation 12:7-9 And there was war in heaven: Michael and his angels fought against the dragon; and the dragon fought and his angels, And prevailed not; neither was their place found any more in heaven.

And the great dragon was cast out, that old serpent, called the Devil, and Satan, which deceiveth the whole world: he was cast out into the earth, and his angels were cast out with him.

The dragon is another name for Satan , Satan and his angels have to be thrown out of Heaven . This brings up another perplexing question . Why was there war in heaven and what was the dragon doing in heaven in the first place? Where did he come from?

We find the first clue in the book of Ezekiel , this prophet was communicated a message from God about the king of Tyre but in the prophecy we see that God is also talking about another person "the exalted king " a different angelic creature.

Let's look at Ezekiel 28:12, 14-15 Son of man, take up a lamentation upon the king of Tyrus, and say unto him, Thus saith the Lord GOD; Thou sealest up the sum, full of wisdom, and perfect in beauty.

Thou art the anointed cherub that covereth; and I have set thee so: thou wast upon the holy mountain of God; thou hast walked up and down in the midst of the stones of fire.

Thou wast perfect in thy ways from the day that thou wast created, till iniquity was found in thee.

Here you have it, a being who's described as the anointed cherub, this was an angel anointed with a special task , in the Jewish temple , the covering cherub stood over the mercy seat which represented the Throne of God , this angel had a special place according to the Bible.

He was the seal of perfection , full of wisdom , perfect in beauty ,the picture of him walking to and fro from the fiery stones suggest someone who existed near the glory of God but something happened to this brilliant angel.

What happened to this brilliant angel was that INIQUITY was found in him, he allowed sin to enter into his life. How? What kind of sin could be in paradise? We found out in verse 17 of the book of Ezekiel 28 Thine heart was lifted up because of thy beauty, thou hast corrupted thy wisdom by reason of thy brightness: I will cast thee to the ground, I will lay thee before kings, that they may behold thee.

What happened to this brilliant angel was that INIQUITY was found in him, he allowed sin to enter into his life. How? What kind of sin could be in paradise? We found out in verse 17 of the book of Ezekiel 28 Thine heart was lifted up because of thy beauty, thou hast corrupted thy wisdom by reason of thy brightness: This angel started to wrapped up because of his own brightness, he became mesmerized by his own beauty ,now let's ponder over that for a minute , there's nothing wrong with appreciating your own talents, abilities and self-esteem , so how did this angel crossed the line?

We get this clue in the book of Isaiah 14:12-14 How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! how art thou cut down to the ground, which didst weaken the nations!

For thou hast said in thine heart, I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God: I will sit also upon the mount of the congregation, in the sides of the north: I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will be like the most High.

In his perfection, Lucifer was like the most High but now he wanted to be like the most High in another sense ,he wanted to be as powerful as the most High ,he wanted to have the authority of the most High . THAT WAS WHAT STARTED IT ALL. That's how this angel began his tragic fall . A fall that would pull alot of angels down with him , Lucifer was cherished , self-esteem twisted into pride . He had a glorious position , he should have been content.

Contentment however twisted into greed , how does this happened? What compels people to want more? Only one thing A REJECTION OF LOVE. Do you know what PRIDE is? Is a subtitude of LOVE .Pride is the awkward garment we throw over our insecurity . Do you know what GREED is? A subtitude for love too . The compulsion too get more and more is a desperate attempt to deal with INSECURITY.

Proud Lucifer was an insecure angel in heaven , John tells us that God is LOVE , love was all around Lucifer, it surrounded him but Lucifer turned away from that love ,he got so wrapped up in his own glory that he took in less and less of the love of God ,What started the vicious cycle? it was started by his own conscious choice . The love Lucifer experienced and took in the more he needed to exalt himself and the more he exalted himself and the less love he felt and the more pride he developed.

Finally, Lucifer began to see God as a rival his twisted mind began to see God as the enemy , Ezekiel tells us that this angel thought he was as wise as a God , "why should God have all the power and authority "? Lucifer thought he could just do as good as running the universe as God was doing. Imagine a place where jealousy and slander have never existed , it had never occurred to anyone to question the wisdom and love of God.

Suddenly, Lucifer, this cherub so close to the throne of God starts making remarks. He wondered why God should have all the glory he wonders why every creature or created being has to obey God? Maybe there's a better alternative, Lucifer questions God's fairness, he cuts himself from love but on the outside he remains a brilliant angel of light and evidently Lucifer persuaded other angels to join in his rebellion, they were enough to go into battle over who had the right to run the universe.

Now this is God's response, a lot of us may wish God had to destroy Lucifer why? Because if this was the origin of evil , if Lucifer was the first to cut himself from God's love, why not destroy him for good before he causes so much suffering in the world? Back to the question why God allow people to suffer.

The answer to that question speaks volumes about God, is speaks volumes about what we are doing on the planet earth , the answer is God is LOVE and God draws us to Himself with cords of Kindness and love does not coerce , remember Lucifer was the first to challenge God's fairness , he claimed there was a better way what if God had just killed him? Would that have settled the question? Would that have put other angels mind at ease?

Love does something different , love does people to decide and choose for themselves , God wants us to love Him back for who He is and that could only happen if we have FREE CHOICE, remember Lucifer had turned into Satan and was cast out of Heaven into earth and here on earth he began to tempt human beings into following him.

When Lucifer challenged God, God told him in effect Okay, set up your own SYSTEM and let the whole universe and let every creature see what will happen in a world cut off LOVE .Now and back then except God knew a disaster Lucifer alternative would be ,now I knew how suffering and misery it would create ,because that is the only way God could solve the problem of evil once and for all, that was the only way he could ensure evil will not be on the universe again.

God wants every question to be answered every doubt to be settled . He wants what happens on this planet to forever stand as a proof of the rightness of Love , God's government is based on Love ,that is the conflict between good and evil all around us , it's God's way of Love vs Satan's way of coercion and manipulation.

Love, Believe it or not is what lies behind the war in heaven , why did God's angels have to battle Satan's angels? Because God sets boundaries around Satan , God allowed Satan to attempt his alternative system but He didn't permit him to recavate the whole universe , Satan was excluded from heaven, God sets limits on what Satan could do and that's part of love too.

Love doesn't coerce or manipulate but love does confront when necessary , Satan was banished from God's throne and God's glory but he didn't leave heaven willingly , he tried to defile God's boundaries and that's why there was war in heaven, Satan and his angels were cast out of Heaven. That's what happened when pride and greed took the bright and brilliant in heaven.

Thank you God bless you all

Ephemeral (Part 2/4)

Pairings: Tony Stark X Reader

Words: 1410

Summary: Could you do something where the Reader is Steve’s fiance and right before the wedding they find out he’s not really in love with them, he’s in love with Sharon? Whether that be he tells them or she finds them together some way. And she goes to Tony for support and after a lil bit (the night of or a few months from then) they get together? Sorry if this is confusing…

Warnings: Some swears,insecure Y/N,and lots of angst. 

Requested By: @wannabe-weasley

Permanent Tag List:@sybil-howlett @palaiasaurus64 @sherlockholmesisbae @redroomproperty  @alwaysoutoftheordinary

Tag List:@laughsandlivi-blog  @madisonjaimie @jdjsjjdis @far-off-dream @ashleygeza@ empathiccally  @vivalaenjolras  @harleyquinnandscarletwitch @cajunlizard@redroomproperty @purplekitten30 @polarixd @incoherent-smiles @lovely-geek  @ crystallimythium @my-current-fandom-is @wordacadabra

Author’s Note:Shall I end it here? Comment below! 

MASTERLIST

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EPHEMERAL MASTERLIST

The door shut behind you with a slam. You pressed your hands against the back of it,as you threw you head back,not having any care in the world how it hard it hit the wood. You sucked in a breath and then you let it all out in one breath,you screamed out of frustration. You slid down with the support of the door,your back against it,and bent your knees,caging them in your arms.

You felt so cold,you felt like a warm blanket had been stolen from a homeless person on Christmas morning. Your whole world was falling apart and you didn’t know what to do to hold it together anymore. Steve was your family,the love of your life. You never expected this sort of betrayal for him. You trusted him with your everything. Your past,your present,your future,your secret,but most of all your emotions. Two years of your life you dedicated to pleasing him. But he,he used you like a tissue and then threw you away. He didn’t even bother telling you. He cheated on you with Sharon of all women. For fucks,sake you didn’t even know how long this,this relation between them had been going on? Maybe he was playing you all along. You scoffed in between the scoffs. Maybe. Perhaps you were worth just that,you thought to yourself.

So you cried. You cried there were no more tears. You cried till there was no energy for you to choke back sobs. And even then you heaved.

“Y/N! Y/N! Open the door!” Tony knocked heavily onto the door from the other side.

You ignored him,sniffling.

“Y/N! It’s not what it looks like.” HIS voice came from the other side. A voice you though you knew oh so well,but not anymore.

“It’s not what it looks like?” Tony sneered. “Are you out of your mind Rogers? You were kissing another woman,while your fucking fiance was preparing for YOUR wedding,which is in three weeks,may I remind you.”

“Tony,please. This is none of your concern. Don’t make it more complicated than it already is. Y/N sweetie please open the door. I beg you. Give me a chance to explain.”

“You made it complicated,when you cheated on her. Now get out of here,before I have to use unnecessary force.”

“Please,I don’t want to talk to anyone right n-"You hiccuped. ”-ow. Leave me alone.“

"You heard her Rogers.” Tony turned to him,to see him already standing up and walking away.

Seriously?! He thought himself. He is not going to insist or anything. He is acting like it Y/N’s fault instead of his. He rolled his eyes,promising himself to acknowledge him later on.

“Y/N honey,let me in.” Tony spoke softly.

“Leave me alone Ton."Your frail voice was heard in the hallway.

"Y/N,listen to me. I know it feels like your world is falling apart. I know it feels like someone just cut open your heart,and stepped on it with frickin combat boots. But trust me it is going to get better. That heart is gonna be glued back,stiched together better than ever.” Tony spoke calmly with an emotion in his voice,that sounded an awful lot like sadness and speaking from experience.

“How would you know?” You whispered from the other side. FRIDAY,though,being the  AI she was playing what you were saying,to Tony on the other side in a louder volume.

He took a deep breath. “Let’s just say Pepper didn’t leave because of Iron Man.”

As realization took over your still broken self,you shuffled up to the wall on the left,clearing way for the door. As soon as you moved FRIDAY immediately snapped open the locks,enabling Tony to enter. For a second,when he entered his brown eyes searched the room for you till they landed on your curled up body. Copying your previous actions,he soft closed the door behind him and took a seat beside you on the floor.

“Hey,"He greeted only to hear silence in return,as you stared into your hands.

"Y/N hon,it’s gonna be okay.” He comforted you,as he held one of your hands,pulling them onto his lap. He traced comforting circles onto your palm,trying to calm down.

“How? Why? Why would it even be ok?”

“Because if it is not ok,then it is not the end.” He softly said.

“Who said that?” Your lip curled up in a small smile.

“A famous person once said that,and now I am saying it,so basically two well-known guys have said this. You should probably believe me.”

“Does it ever get better Tony?"You questioned.

"Does what get better?"He asked,confused.

"The pain,the pain in my chest.”

“Yes, it does.Especially if you have someone who cares for you,close to you.That did it for me.It still hurts,when I think about all our memories together,although now it feels like a slight pinch.After all, I do have someone else to think about now”

“Who?”

“Hmm…I might tell you someday.”

You two sat together in a comfortable silence for a few moments. You stared down into your lap as you contemplated what had just happened,and he stared at you. He looked at how your thick eyelashes created a perfect shadow on your cheeks. He stared at your parted,chapped lips due to all the crying.

“Maybe it was me.” You broke the silence.

“Huh?” Tony looked at you,alarmed.

“Maybe it was me. Maybe I was not beautiful enough. Perhaps my personality was not good enough. I wasn’t serious enough,you know my tendencies to make jokes in every god damn situation. Maybe it was because I wasn’t worthy enough.Or,or.."You breathed heavily,but he let you continue knowing this was the only way you were going to let it out.

"Maybe it’s because I am not a righteous Avenger. I have killed people Tony. Maybe that’s why. Maybe it’s because I am normal human unlike him who is a,a super soldier. Maybe it’s because he prefers stay at home women. I-I could quit,you know. Change myself into the person he wants me to be. I can stay at home,cook for him and do all the household chores….and and."You hiccupped again.

"Don’t you ever,ever in our lifetimes say that again.” He looked at you with bafflement.

“Say what?”

“That you are not worthy enough. You are absolutely worthy and much more than that. Never call yourself not beautiful becasue you are much more than that. Y/N L/N you are a goddess in you own right. You are the most passionate,most worthy most kind person I have ever met in my whole life. Someone of Steve’s caliber doesn’t deserve you. You deserve the world and much more you deserve a man who is going to love you and cherish you like you are supposed to be all your life. You deserve the nine realms, and beyond. So don’t you ever let me hear you say that you are not worthy,not loved. Because you. You are worthy and you are loved by all of us and more around the world. And don’t doubt that again!”

He lectured you with so much emotion that your eyes watered up again. You threw yourself onto him,and  freed the emotions. You unlocked the stress,the broken heartedness not just for today,but for the past months,every since he had started ignoring you. And now you knew. So you cried,you cried till you could cry no longer,and even then you didn’t let him go. In that moment’ and onwards he was your anchor,he kept you grounded.

“Shh."He whispered into your hair,as he pressed a kiss upon the crown of you head."It’s going to be okay.”

Those were the last words you heard as you passed out in the arms of the man that loved you like no other.

TAGLIST IS OPEN.

(both permanent and for Ephemeral.Please send an ask/message as it makes it easier for me to add you. But if you can’t simply reply,or mention it in the reblog by tagging me.)

Love Yourself

WARNING - self doubt , assholes degrading the reader . 

Request - Thank you so much @melconnor2007 for the request . I hope you like it . 

Hi I was wondering if you could do a one shot requests on Bucky, something along the lines the reader and Bucky have been dating for ages, but she's struggling with being happy about the way she looks, when she over hears some other agents or people talking about how good looking Bucky is and how muscles he is, then they start saying how the reader isn't pretty enough to be dating Bucky, and she gets upset locking herself in her room, and Bucky breaks in and is reassuring telling her how pretty she is and how much he loves her and it's really fluffy if that makes any sense please 

A/N- This wasn’t easy to write . For the first time , I started with a blank page thrice . Tbh , there was a time I felt like this but I no more do . I don’t give shit about people think about the way I look . I like myself and that is all that matters . I don’t like people who choose to like or not like me over superficial things like appearances . So I am open to anyone who wants to speak with me . I want you to make yourself feel better . And one day I hope you realise that you are  beautiful . I LOVE YOU 

“Do you  have the time ......”, I sang as I got ready for Bucky’s return .He was off on a mission and I hadn’t seen him for almost 2 weeks . I missed him more than I could describe .It wasn’t the first  time he was away from me for so long but this time it was different . A day before he had left I had a breakdown . When I joined the avengers it wasn’t easy to get along with everyone . I was great at hand to hand combat and rifling and that is why I was chosen to go on missions .

But I could never truly believe that anyone would like me.  Anyone would call me pretty or beautiful . I always felt I wasn’t pretty enough in front of Nat and Wanda. Self-consciousness ate me up. But I decided that as long as I am an avenger I will be strong. I will never let anyone see me weak , only so they could laugh at me Every time anyone new agent who didn’t know my position would make a comment behind my back about how I look , I could feel my blood boiling . But more so my tears brimming , and begging to fall .

 But I couldn’t . I bottled them all up . I tried my best to look immune to it all . But everything came crashing down , one  night . I just couldn’t hold back the tears , I couldn’t keep my body from shaking , my stomach shaking with every sob . As tears rolled down my face , wetting the pillow covers , I could feel Bucky’s arm wrap around me , pulling me closer to his chest .

 He whispered sweet things into my ears all night , wiping the tears off my face and kissing me all over . It started with soft kisses on my cheeks , shoulders , forehead. The kisses turned more passionate and the touches more needy . He spent all night worshiping every inch of my body , making sweet love to me . It wasn’t the first time I broke down while being with Bucky . He understood me , and I was grateful .

Today , I decided I was going to pay him back for that . I wanted to be more comfortable in my skin , in the way I look . Wear a dress and feel pretty for once , instead of beating myself up for not looking like the other girls . I wore a black dress , with a lace back , that came up to my lower knee . 

It had been a while since I dressed up for anything . I usually stayed back when Tony arranged parties  , giving some shitty excuse . I didn’t want to look back into the mirror , fearing it’ll make me not do any of this .

I put on my sandals and made my way to the roof to greet Bucky as soon as he gets down the quinjet . I had a smile on my face , at the thought of Bucky hugging the shit out of me and attacking me with kisses . I wanted to feel his lips and hands on my skin, his light stubble tickling me  .

As I reached the roof I found a few other agents gathered there . They were new recruits who had come for training 2 months back . Instead of going in front of them and creating some tension , I decided to stand behind them .

  “Oh god , has it been two weeks?”, one of the agent asked the other . Bree, I thought to myself remembering her name .

“Almost . God , I missed him so much.”, said Kris , the other agent .

Were they talking about Bucky? They missed Bucky ? Why?

“Yeah , me too . Remember the gym time . He looked so hot in those black shorts , stretching his body , lifting weights .”

“I know . And his muscles . Uhhhh , they fucking killed me .” “OH ,and his metal arm . That  makes him even more hotter.”

Now I realised , obviously they were  talking about Bucky . Yes , he was hot and the muscles could kill me any day , but I couldn’t help the pang of jealousy that hit me . I was never insecure before about Bucky leaving me because he never gave me a reason to be . My train of thoughts was broken when they started speaking again . “Do you think I could ask him out?”, WHAT?? Did they not know that Bucky was with me? That he was dating me?

“I don’t know . I heard someone saying that he  has been in a relationship for the past 2 years .” “Woah , who is it?” “Jonah was telling me  it was Y/N . Jake saw them kissing in the kitchen so..” “Y/N?? But she’s so....”, she said giving a confused look to the other agent . I could already feel where this was going . I buried such thoughts in the deepest corners of my mind . When I started dating Bucky , these questions plagued my mind all night . But when I realised he genuinely like me , I decided to give myself a chance at love .

“Yeah . I think Bucky deserves better . I mean , look at him . He is so fucking hot .I mean we would make such a hot couple .  ”

“Yeah . Y/N also seems kinda like a loner . I don’t know she doesn’t seem Bucky’s type . And how come we never really knew about them . He doesn’t seem to be going out much with her ......”

I could feel my eyes burning , tears threatening to spill . I turned around and made my way back to the room without even waiting for Bucky .

I closed the door as I fell against it . But why would Bucky want to be with someone like me when he could have anyone else he wanted . Any girl would happily want to be with him . I am not sexy or hot like the other girls .I am not as pretty as Wanda . Why would I even try to wear dresses like these . 

Why do I even bother? I will never be like the tall , thin beautiful girls like those agents . Does Bucky feel that way too . Is that why he never took you out on dates and rather just stayed home to watch Tv with some pizza . Maybe he would be better off with those girls .

I cried hard . I didn’t care if anyone heard or not . I felt disgusted with myself . I just wanted to run away from here . Far from everyone . And Bucky . I couldn’t face Bucky .I wasn’t even sure if he loved me . Why would he?

“Y/N?”, I hear Bucky knocking the door calling out my name . At the  sound of his voice , the tears spill even more , my whole body shaking violently , my head aching like shit , my whole face tear-ridden.

“Y/N? Open up the door .”, he says sternly this time .

“Go away Bucky.”, I say choking on your tears .

I get up and rip the dress of my body and fall on to the bed .

I  bury my  face into the pillow to muffle my sobbing .

“Y/N ,  if you don’t open up I’ll have to break the door . Please open up doll.”, he sounded so desperate .

I got off the bed and opened the door and immediately turned my face away from him and laid on the corner of the bed , in a foetus position .

I heard him drop his nag onto the floor , and felt the dip in the bed when he got on it .

He turned me around by my shoulders and wrapped his arms around my body .

I sobbed harder in his embrace .

“Shhhh , it’s okay .”, he said rubbing my back gently trying to calm me down .

“Do you love me Bucky?”, I ask between sobs.

“I do Y/N . Of course . I love you so much .”, he said placing a kiss on my hair and cupping my face so that he could see me .

“What happened doll?”he asked looking into my eyes , brushing away the wet hair from my face .

“Why?” “What why?” “Why do you love me Bucky ?”, you voice breaking in the end . Breaking Bucky’s heart .

“Because you make me happy . You make me feel comfortable around you . You help me , You have accepted me for who I am with no judgement . But most importantly even after all the ugly things I have done in my life , you still think I am beautiful . You make me see the good part in me that I never thought existed . You gave me a reason to live . You gave me a reason to want to wake up everyday . Everyday I get up and see you sleeping so peacefully next to brings calmness into my body .It makes me feel like the luckiest man in the world .” “Bucky.....But ... I am not pretty like the other girls , I am not as beautiful as the . I just.... You are so perfect and then I am....”

“What? You are what Y/N? You are the most beautiful person I have ever met . You only hope for others happiness . You see the good in people , and help them remove the bad . You are an inspiration to may young kids out there who also want to save the kids like you . But most importantly you are the most loving person I have ever met .

 And it breaks my heart to see that you don’t love yourself . I wish I could make you see yourself the way I do . You are beautiful . And you don’t need to be like the others . I love you for who you are . And if others don’t think that , then they don’t deserve you .” I wrap my arms around his huge torso and hug him tight .

He massages my scalp and rubs my back . The steady  rise and fall of his chest calms me .

“I love you Bucky . So much.”, I whisper as I fall asleep in his arms.

“I love you too Y/N . And one day I hope you’ll love yourself the way I love you .”  

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