#red room!reader
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There are Widows and There are Men - Part 3
A/N: This part will be darker, it will involve a sexual assault scene that borders on rape. The reader will be four years old in those scenes. Please do not read this if you are uncomfortable. The scene will be in bold, after that it will not describe it any further.
Series Title: There are Widows and There are Men
Chapter Title: Part Three - Memories are clawing at me
Song: The Exit - Conan Gray
Pairings: Billy Russo x Black Widow!Reader (Also autistic!reader and implied to be on the aromantic spectrum)
Word Count: 4304
Warnings: Rape, SA, Self Harm, Red Room, Dreykov, Canon Typical Violence, Age Gap
~
You had fallen asleep not long after Jessica and Trish had left. After a few hours of mind numbing conversation and revelling in being free, they left you to rest. It helped that Jessica had some less then legal activities to attend to, but that was life now wasn’t it? Your boss hated you and your closest friends were vigilantes. You thought about Billy, what would he do when he came back to you? Would he hate you for good or perhaps he’d put you out of your misery? The betrayal in his eyes had stung. The way he looked at you with disgust mixed with rage and horror. You were used to being treated like a monster. It was all your life had been. Blood, murder, kidnapping, torture and all these other crimes you were made to commit.
“You up?”
You looked to the source of the voice. Smooth hair that wasn’t styled to perfection, dark eyes that look black in this light, dried up lips and a messy green sweater. It was Billy but he looked almost unrecognisable like this. What had he been through?
“I’m up, you okay Mr Russo?”
His head hung low, his feet kicking the ground. The tension was thick and layered. If you cut it with a knife you’d be able to see it. Billy’s footsteps were quiet as he found his way to you. The hospital bed creaked as he sat down. You adjusted yourself to the weight change. Making sure you were comfortable for the inevitable awkward conversation.
“I’m sor-“
He cut you off by placing a hand to your lips. They lingered for a moment as he looked at you gently. You could tell Billy wanted the first word by the look in his eyes. As his hand pulled away from your face it fell into his lap. Toying with the fabric of his stained jeans.
“Look… I didn’t mean to yell. I… shit. I’m not good with this touchy feely crap. Frankie’s always been better at it. I care about you… a lot. You were just so different, so… pure and fresh. When I saw you covered in blood I freaked. I care about you… a lot. I was scared… really fucking scared”
Tears started to prickle in the corner of his eyes as he spoke. That work facade that he put on, the strong and confident former marine turned business mogul was falling apart in front of you.
“I grew up in the system. My mother… she uh left me in front of a fire station out in Albany. My childhood was group homes and the occasional foster parent until they’d kick me to the curb again. It’s why I joined the Marines… to feel like I belonged somewhere. You know, as a kid I used to play stickball a lot. Used to hit the ball nearly all the time, thought I was gonna be the next Joe DiMaggio or some stupid shit. I was a kid and yknow, kids dreamed big. There was this Samaritan, used to come by the group home… he told me I was pretty. When a grown man tells you you’re pretty you know nothing good is coming. He cornered me, tried to touch me… so I hit him with the stickball bat. Caught him good a few times too but it pissed him off. He tore my rotator cuff. Shit… memory still hurts. I got a buddy who works with vets, he runs a support group. When I told him, he said that’s why I have this sexual deviant persona as he called it. Cause it’s all I think I’m good for. That and the guns and shit”
He was playing with his hands as he spoke. Looking down at them so intently, he was scared of how'd you react. Your thoughts churned, he didn’t deserve this. You’d heard stories about the foster system from your higher ups. About how lucky you were to have been taken in by the Red Room and didn’t grow up in the system.
“Is he dead?”
His head lifted at your question. Eyes widened like a deer in headlights. Billy put his hand on your leg, fingers drumming lightly.
“No, but what does it matter now? No proof anyways, he’s served 15 years so the countries clearly okay with it”
Rage seeped in your veins. Billy sounded so defeated as he spoke and it resonated with you. In the Red Room one of your trainers had taken advantage of you.
“What’s his name?”
His hand tightened on your thigh. Billy’s breathing got heavier and you could hear it clear as day.
“No, no shut up. I can’t have you hurt anyone. You shouldn’t have to. You aren’t in that shit-hole anymore”
He threw himself up, standing heavily on his feet. One of his hands ran through his hair, pushing the messy locks back. Making his way to the window to look out at the overcrowded streets. You studied him intently.
“Billy you were a kid”
Your voice was quiet. You knew better than to pity Billy, pity in these situations always felt horrible.
“SO WERE YOU”
His fist came up and slammed down onto the windowsill. It garnered attention of nurses whom you had waved off. Giving them a sorry look. You looked back at Billy, sadness in your eyes.
“Billy… what happened in the Red Room isn’t the same as what happened to you. You were a kid who was meant to be protected in those organisations. I’m nothing more then a pawn. You’ve managed to change the world, you were meant to be protected and they all failed you”
Billy walked back over to you, towering over you. You reached a hand up to him, the cannula prominent on your hand. His own arm reached up, fingers wrapping around your wrist.
“Why are you so insistent on dehumanising yourself?”
~
“The little spider can’t fight back anymore?”
His voice made you shiver. You were only four years old but you knew enough to know this wasn’t going anywhere good. Your training has only just begun recently and your trainer was a cruel man. His name was Mikhael and he wasn’t toned like anyone else. He was round and balding, much older then the widows. You had assumed he’d been here as long as Dreykov. What he lacked in physical fighting skills he made up for in computer science and weapons. He taught most widows how to use a bow, teaching them how to aim.
“It’s okay. I can help you”
His hand reached out for you, groping your thighs. Pulling you toward him, Mikhael started yelling when you thrashed. His actions were violent and erratic. You couldn’t even blink before your body made contact with the floor. The cold, concrete floor. The same floor you’d seen so much blood fall from other widows as you were made to watch them fight. Necks snapping and bones breaking. It was a vicious sight but what you were about to feel scared you so much more.
“It’s okay моя дочь. I won’t hurt you too much, just let me touch this precious little body of yours”
His hands roamed up your thighs, they just about covered your entire body. He was huge compared to you. When once you were just a small child you were now his plaything. The man who made you call him “Papa” and called you his daughter. The widows had seen a lot and so had you, but this was not the violence you were used to. In your mind you were telling yourself that you were four years old and you didn’t deserve this. Although some twisted part of you couldn’t help but think you did. You’re being raised to be a weapon, so isn’t this penance for the sins you’ll soon commit?
He kept pawing at you, mutty hands and greasy fingers feeling at the space between your thighs. You tried to ignore the feeling, convinced yourself that one day this would be nothing but a bad dream. His other hand found your chest and held onto it. You wanted to vomit. Release it into his face and watch it curl up in disgust.
~
The memory played in your mind like a broken record. You’ve been nothing but a weapon and a sex toy since birth, why would Billy see you as any different? The two of you looked at one another in longing. You weren’t capable of love, puppets didn’t feel anything.
“There was this man… in the red room. He treated me like his daughter. For the first four years of my life I was his daughter. I was born and bred for the red room, stolen from my real family. Since I was an infant that man was all I knew. When I begun my training…”
You trailed off, climbing out of the bed and walking over to Billy. Your arms snaked around his neck, pulling him towards you. As you lowered your arms back down you slowly lifted the skirt of the hospital gown up. Revealing cotton underwear and your thighs decorated in scars. One hand holding the fabric up, your free one reached for Billy’s hand. Bringing it to cup the mound between your thighs. He tried to pull away, shaking his head.
“I was a little thing when I learnt what being touched here felt like Billy. I’m far from being human, I never have been. I’m a weapon, a doll for the Red Room to toss around and use to kill. I am nothing without the blood that has stained my skin and my mind for decades. No matter how hard I scrub, not matter what I do I cannot erase that. You chose to fight, you chose that life for a noble reason. I’m bred for it, they raised me like they raise the lambs to slaughter. You’re a Lieutenant, a decorated war hero who has clawed his way to the top of only for a moment while I am the Blood Widow. I have killed innocents because it’s what I was made for. I’m designed for this, they made me in a lab so I would be the perfect weapon. The Red Room’s greatest creation since Natalia and Taskmaster”
Billy didn’t meet your eyes and you couldn’t blame him. In such short time everything has changed and he’s seen you as the one thing you swore never to show him. His hand was still firm against your core, cupping it gently like you would break if he dared force himself onto you. Many people before Billy had put themselves onto you, taken you by force and brutally destroyed you. You still remember the blood seeping from your core while your assailant left you for dead in an alleyway. When you escaped the Red Room and made your way to New York you had made yourself a promise. If you ever saw anyone being attacked in that way you would make sure the streets ran red with the blood of the perpetrator. It doesn’t matter if they had a family, the victims need to be protected. If it got messy then so be it, no one protected you so you would do whatever it took.
His hand started to trail down, his eyes following as he looked at the scars decorating your legs. Bullet holes, stab wounds and your own creations stretched all over your skin like an abstract art piece. There was a time you were ashamed of the scars and some days your still are. It was one night with Trish that made you appreciate them. You, her and Jessica were all drunk. Sitting in the blondes high end apartment as you discussed her latest heart break. It was a warmer summer day and after so much time spent in the snow, warm seemed like you were standing right next to the sun itself. You sat on Trish’s couch in a torn sports bra and ragged gym shorts. The two women weren’t strangers to your scars, it was only a few years ago you were sent to kill Jessica, but now you were comfortable with them. Living in peaceful bliss for a few short moments. Trish was asking about the scars again and as you explained each one she made a comment about how beautiful they were. She spoke of how your skin was a story, living history of what you’ve survived. Those words still live with you and you can’t help but believe them even in your darkest times.
With a small thud Billy dropped to his knees, one hand on your hip and the other on your thigh. He started playing with the scars, tracing them like they were lines in a colouring book. You watched him curiously as he drew patterns with his finger against the tissue, a small smile gracing your face. Billy Russo was a ex-special forces Marine, a Lieutenant with nearly 150 confirmed kills, a foster kid who rose to the top and is now a CEO of one of New York’s most prestigious security services, but here right now he was just Billy. Not your boss or your superior, but your friend. It made you realise he didn’t hate you, he wasn’t mad at your for lying or for not coming to him with your troubles. He was mad at the people who did this to you, who hurt you in unimaginable ways that seemed like mere fiction to him. He had seen wars and battles, watched the men he called his brothers die and so had you. Very different experiences yet your lives were so similar that it made you wonder if that’s why you connected so well.
Without warning his lips pressed against one of the scars. His lips were warm and the feeling was welcome. He moved to the next one and repeated the action, pressing his attention to every scar he could find. His hands wrapped around your thighs and you felt small in his grasp. Once he had finished his ministrations he looked up at you, eyes pleading.
“Come to me, I don’t care what it is. I need you to let me help you. I don’t get attached, I can’t because everyone leaves. My mum left me at a first station, the Castle’s died and now Frankie’s gone again too. Please let me help you, I need you”
With parted lips you looked down at the man before you. On his knees practically worshipping you, begging for you. You went to respond but the door opening pulled you both out of your thoughts. Without thinking Billy had sprung to his feet, head snapping towards the door. A nurse walked in and for a moment you panicked. That was until you were met with Claire’s gentle eyes and warm smile. You let a breath you didn’t know you were holding and walked over to Claire, letting her take you in her arms.
“Normally we’d keep you under observation for a few more days, but because of your… history I think it’s better if we let you go. Do you have somewhere safe to stay? I know Luke and Danny have set up a few safe houses if you need”
As you pulled away from Claire you pondered the option. Not before you turned back to Billy, tear stained cheeks and messy hair. You hadn’t noticed he’d been crying. He looked so different from the man you knew, the put together guy who was strong and took no shit was now a mess all because of you. Turning back to Claire you smiled gently.
“It’ll be okay, I’ve got a place. Days like this I’m glad I work for a security company. Plus I think it’s best if I stay with Billy”
You gestured to the man behind you and Claire followed, looking at him. As she focused her attention back on you heard shuffling, looking over your shoulder you saw Billy turning around, staring out the window to try and give you a sense of privacy.
“That’s your boss? Wow, I know you said he was good looking but god. You sure know how to pick them huh Huntress?”
Huntress, the name the media had given you. While your face was known to the public your name wasn’t and you preferred it stay that way. The name wasn’t clever in any shape or form, but then again what New York vigilante had a smart moniker? Daredevil, Spider-Man, Moonknight, the other Spider-Man, Power Man and so on so forth. The papers or reporters were not clever with the titles they gave to the unofficial heroes that protected New York, you just wished you weren’t lumped in with them. With one last smile Claire walked out, allowing you to change before you got discharged.
“Shit…”
You turned round to Billy who was now sitting on the bed, watching you intently. You had looked through the bag Jessica brought you and they had forgotten a change of clothes. The only other outfit you had was the one that was bloodstained and had a rather noticeable tear in it from the bullet.
“What is it?”
You turned to face him, his eyes still red and puffy. It made your heart flutter, you know it shouldn’t but there was something so exciting in being cared for. Knowing that Billy cried because of you, because he cared? It made you giddy like a school girl asked to the prom.
“Jessica and Trish forgot to pack me some spare clothes”
Billy looked at you, not saying anything as if he were still in though. As he launched up he looked down at you a small smile creeping cross his face. He didn’t say anything as he left the room. You had no idea what he was up to but you hoped it wouldn’t be anything too long as you didn’t have it in you. Turns out after not getting shot at for 3 years it takes a lot out of you once you finally do get a bullet tearing through your flesh again. Sighing, you took a seat on the bed and laid down. As you splayed yourself out like a starfish you gazed at the ceiling. Imagining the plain white sky was replaced with the darkness and a million stars. It was one thing you despised about the city, air pollution causing the stars to be hidden. You missed them, astronomy was the only area of science you were good at. In a way you thought the stars were yours, the night sky was this special thing you loved back in the Red Room. It was your secret and the stars would sing songs for you.
Around five minutes had passed before Billy had come back up. In his hands he held a shirt and what looked to be gym shorts. He held them out to you and you took them, turning them over in your hands.
“I had a spare change of clothes in my car from a training session I ran the other day. Better then nothing, they’ll be a little big but at least you won’t be in nothing”
You stood up from the bed, placing the clothes down before taking the time to untie the hospital gown. Billy hadn’t had time to process what was happening before you stood in front of him in nothing but cotton panties. His gaze immediately darted away. Hands covering his eyes as a string of apologies fell from his mouth. It clicked in your head that he probably wasn’t so used to casual nudity, most people in the city seeing it as taboo. In the Red Room it was common, experiments on naked girls, or your superiors watching you change. You had grown used to stripping in front of others, not caring about any insecurities you may have. As you pulled the shorts on and tied the lace as tight as you could, the shirt came next. It hung loose over your frame as Billy was both taller and bigger than you were. Stepping towards the marine, you pulled his hands away. Mumbling an apology for making him uncomfortable.
“No, none of that. I turned around because I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable. Not because I was uncomfortable, I was used to this shit happening in the marines. I just didn’t know how’d you feel given your history and all. Fuck… I just don’t want you to think I’m going to take what I want from you and then leave you behind. I know what it’s like for that shit to happen without your consent, to be the victim and be blamed. I don’t want to ruin our… friendship because you’re scared of me”
He hesitated before saying friendship and some part of you had wished he’d said relationship. You didn’t know why. While you couldn’t deny that you were certainly attracted to Billy visually, you didn’t know if you could ever see yourself with him romantically. You looked him up and down, staring gently at his big dark eyes. He looked like a wet cat and as you walked over to him, you wrapped your arms around his waist. Pulling him into you tightly. As he returned the favour you listened to his heart beat. Gentle and slow, yet it seemed to speed up a bit as he held onto you.
“Let’s go get you discharged and go back to my place. Get you out of here and make a plan or some shit. Sound good?”
You nodded and he held out his hand which you hesitantly took. When you did it felt normal, almost domestic. You smiled inwardly and walked alongside him. As you reached the desk, he filled out your discharge paper work for you. For the first time in a while you felt yourself fully trusting a man. Something you hadn’t ever been able to do. Even in a workplace full of men who were ex-military and always joking around with you, you couldn’t help but wait for the other shoe to drop and succumb to their violence. With Billy that had never been the case, he was respectful and he engaged in conversation with you that wasn’t just small talk or filler. It was nice and as he walked you to his car now you couldn’t help but wonder what he’d be like in a relationship.
As you approached his Wraith you couldn’t help but be stunned. You knew he was wealthy, ANVIL took on all sorts of big shot clients but this was something else. Billy opened the door for you and helped you get settled, buckling you in as if you were a child. While the gesture would feel demeaning form anyone else, with Billy it felt nice. You both knew that you were made of glass yet Billy treated you with utmost care. Even before discovering your childhood. He’d treat you like you were a pristine painting, to be looked at but not to touch. Like you were worth more money than anyone could ever imagine.
As he started to drive you looked over at him, his eyes were less red and the corner of his lips formed the beginning of a smile. It felt far to simple and as your thoughts started to consume you a hand was placed in your thigh. Billy looked at you, smiling as he continued to drive through the streets of New York. His thumb rubbing the skin of your leg and you couldn’t help but melt into his touch.
“Is this a good time to mention that English isn’t actually my first language?”
The worlds fell out of you before you could even realise what was happening. Billy snuck a look at you, eyebrows raised in questioning. A sigh escaped your mouth as you explained.
“I know we’ve covered the whole I’m actually a spy for the Red Room academy who poised me as a Bolshoi dancer. They trained me to be an assassin and I’ve killed like 5000 people or whatever but it feels important to note that English isn’t my first language. I guess I didn’t mention it cause it feels embarrassing, but working for ANVIL in such a high place and fumbling over my words would just be too much for me. Russian is my first language, then it goes French, Latin, Mandarin, Italian, Greek, Spanish, Afrikaans, Dutch, Irish, Japanese, Somali, Arabic, Punjabi, Portuguese and then English”
You finished speaking, a sliver of your Russian accent slipping through. In an attempt to calm yourself you took his hand in your own, playing with his fingers like a child. You had never really gotten the chance to be a kid so some of your behaviours were regressive in that sense. A small chuckle escaped Billy’s lips and you looked at him, eyes wide like a deer.
“Come to think of it I have noticed small errors when looking over some files you’ve given me. I always just assumed you were tired or it was because you’re autistic and you didn’t process it correctly. Look, native speaker or not, your english is damn good. For someone who speaks 16 languages it’s impressive that you can pass as a native”
He smiled at you, teeth on full display as it spread across his face. You always loved when he smiled like this. He wasn’t trying to be the suave CEO or the charming guy you’d hook up with in a bar, he was just himself. Free of the confines of his work persona and acting like he was free. You went to speak again but Billy had interrupted you.
“And for the record, you belong at ANVIL more then any other of my guys. You were one of the first people I hired after it really kicked off and the company wouldn’t survive without you. Now after learning all that shit I think you belong there more then I do. The things you survived to get where you are? Not everyone could come through that”
If only he realised how true his words were.
~
There are Widows and There are Men taglist:
@thefictionalgemini
@woowwwee
@celestialams
@noortsshift
Billy Russo Taglist:
@snowkestrel
#billy russo#billy russo imagine#billy russo x reader#billy russo angst#billy russo fluff#the punisher imagine#frank castle#ben barnes#the punisher#frank castle x reader#jessica jones#trish walker#red room#blackwidow!reader#nadia van dyne#red room!reader#tw: sa mention#tw: sa#there are widows and there are men#billy russo x black widow reader
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Never Again
Bucky Barnes x Female Reader
Summary: Despite an intense dislike for one another, you and Bucky begrudgingly get paired together for a mission. You’re forced to look past your differences when things so south.
Warnings: Canon level violence, asshole Bucky (at first), enemies to lovers vibes, other mcu characters make appearances. Word count: 6.1k
a/n: AHHHH my first fic in like 6 months! this is also the first time I've ever written for Bucky or written anything like this. It was a lot of fun and I hope I did him justice lol. Enjoy!
The loud hissing of the Keurig was a rude awakening to your 7am start to the day. Unfortunately, Steve had decided to hold a team conference meeting at 8. Why he chose to annoy you all like this, you weren’t sure.
“Are you fucking done yet?” You instantly recognized the deep, rough voice muttering under his breath behind you. Bucky had his arms folded and was impatiently waiting for you to finish up at the machine so he could make his own cup.
“Already have a stick up your ass today, huh Barnes?” You spit back at him before moving to let him use the Keurig.
“Well, I wouldn’t have one if you weren’t the first thing I saw when I came down the stairs.”
Damn. That stung. “Have you ever been nice for once in your life? Or is being a dick just a permanent part of your personality?”
At your words, Bucky looked up at you and feigned offense “Oh, I’m nice” He assured you in an almost sweet tone, before turning cold again “…to people that deserve it.”
You rolled your eyes at him, muttering a ‘whatever’, and left the kitchen to go take a seat in the conference room. Unfortunately, that wasn’t an atypical conversation for you to have with Bucky. Ever since you had joined the team almost a year ago - at Natasha Romanoff’s request - Bucky had been anything but welcoming. At first, you thought it was just friendly banter, him trying to sarcastically intimidate you, but it was clear by now that he genuinely had a deep distaste for you.
Soon enough, everyone else started to file in for the meeting. Nat smiled as she took the seat next to you, her regular spot, and quietly started asking you about your morning. Bucky was the last one to enter the room, and by that point the only seat left was the one on your other side.
He glared at you as he sat down.
“It’s not my fault you’re always late to these things” You quipped under your breath.
“Don’t push it, sweetheart” Bucky frustratingly muttered, and you quickly opened your mouth to reply before Natasha interrupted,
“Don’t bother with him, Y/N. He’s always a grump in the mornings”
‘No, he’s always a grump to me’ you thought to yourself, but kept your mouth shut.
“Good Morning, everyone” Steve finally got started with the meeting, a cheery grin on his face that was all too happy for 8am, in your opinion.
“As you all know, for months now we’ve been trying to track down where exactly Ian Haverford and his men have been setting up camp and operating their illegal activities” Most recently, the team had been working on taking down a group of rouge scientists. They had somehow been creating and using a serum that was similar to the super soldier serum. A antidote that made them have increased strength, speed and agility. They then used their new enhancements to rob and kill storeowners, evade the police, and then subsequently sell the drugs and weapons that they had stolen.
“We’ve finally located their compound, up in rural Virginia, we-“
“What he meant to say was I located their compound in Virginia” Tony cheekily butt in.
Steve sighed, having to stop his own eye roll, “Fine, yes, Tony located the compound. Anyway, as I was saying…We believe that that’s where they’re making the serum. The sooner we go in, the less time they have to continue using the serum and giving it to more people. Now, I didn’t necessarily think this was a task we all needed to partake in. It really only requires two people to take down Haverford and gather intel on what chemicals they’ve been using”
Steve took a big breath before revealing who he had assigned to the mission, knowing he’d have hell to pay, “Y/N and Bucky will be heading to Virginia tomorrow morning-“
“Are you serious Rogers?!” You immediately confronted Steve’s decision as you heard Bucky next you,
“You’ve got to be kidding me” He mumbled, clearly as annoyed as you were.
Steve put his hands up defensively, “I know the two of you don’t always get along, but I was hoping this assignment would allow you to work together and actually have to interact beyond your bickering”
You had never been on a mission with just Bucky before. Of course, the two of you had been on missions with the rest of the avengers together, but never just the two of you.
Steve continued, “Besides, we need someone who’s a super soldier to infiltrate the compound. Bucky has the strength and speed to match that of Haverford’s people. And Y/N, you also have enhancements, it makes sense to send the both of you in together.” He concluded by basically saying his decision was final, and that you and Buck would be leaving on a quinjet first thing tomorrow.
During your years in the red room, you had been injected with various substances and drugs that over time had enhanced your agility, flexibility, reflexes and even your sight. But you didn’t see how that made you a necessary aspect to this assignment. You were sure Steve was just using that as an excuse, he really just wanted you to get along better with Bucky.
Speaking of which, Buck stood up from his chair as you looked over at him, he glowered at you for a moment before scoffing, “Guess I’ll just have to grin and bear it” and with that he left the room.
You stayed, waiting for everyone else to file out so that you could speak with Steve privately. Natasha gave you a sympathetic look and squeezed your shoulder, as she was the last one to head out after talking to Steve for a while herself. You were always sort of jealous of their friendship. Of course, you had Nat. Who was your closest confidant in the group. But you also wanted to be close with the guys as well. You supposed Steve was your friend, but sometimes it felt like he looked at you as more of a younger sister.
Finally, it was just you and Steve alone in the room and you were still sitting in your same seat, Steve standing at the head of the table. He tilted his head towards you and quirked his eyebrows, waiting for you to say something.
“Why does he hate me?” You asked quietly. You had always wanted to go to Steve for advice on how to handle Bucky, but never wished to cause a rift in their friendship or make Steve feel like he was put in the middle of something.
His eyes went soft and he sighed, “Oh Y/N” He began gently “I know it may come off that way, but Buck doesn’t hate you. He just…” Steve looked to find the right words, “has a hard time handling his emotions and how he feels about people… especially people that bring up past trauma for him”
Steve’s little hint helped you clue in to what he was trying to imply. You knew that Bucky had a history with the red room, long before you ever did, but you never really knew the details of it or how he was involved. You were saved from Dreykov almost a year ago when Natasha returned to destroy him. You were one of Yelena’s closest friends and she had introduced you to Nat, who then saw how skilled you were and decided to invite you to join the avengers, since you really had no other home to go to. Yelena meanwhile, had wanted to enjoy her freedom a little more and chose to see the world a bit before deciding to join any sort of vigilante team. Though Natasha always held out hope that she would finally join one day when she felt ready.
“But Nat’s from the red room too!” You defended yourself, “And Bucky treats her perfectly fine! It’s not my fault that my past is what it is. I can’t help the fact that I was raised there, why does he have to hold that against me?” You started to get emotional and Steve could tell, so he began to try and explain his friends behavior.
“Well, he’s gotten to know Natasha for a few years now, so I think they’re on better terms. Plus he kinda owes her one for how she saved both our asses during the whole…sokovia accords thing” Steve said the last part quietly while sort of shamefully looking down. Despite the fact that it was worked out now, that whole incident with him, Tony and Bucky still deeply bothered Steve to even bring up.
He continued after a moment, “He doesn’t hold it against you Y/N, it’s not your fault. He just doesn’t like the memories you bring up for him, the things you remind him of. And he doesn’t know how to properly process and work through them, so instead he just takes out that pent up anger and self hatred on you. It’s not fair to you, but it’s also not your fault.”
“Get him to see a therapist then” you muttered.
Steve scoffed, “Believe me, I’ve tried.”
He then walked around the length of the table to where you were sitting and gave you a pleading look, “Just give him a chance. Hopefully this mission will be the thing that finally gets him to see you in a different light. I know it’s hard to believe, but he really does have a sweet, soft side under all that brooding, if you dig deep enough” And that was what Steve left you with as he walked out, leaving you alone to mull over what he had said.
———————
For the rest of that day, you and Bucky both avoided each other. You spent most of the afternoon locked up in your room or in the gym, perfecting a few moves with Nat’s help in preparation for your assignment. You didn’t see Bucky all day, you assumed he also was doing his best to not run into you.
Now, you were seated across from him on the quinjet, an awkward silence taking up the majority of the ride to a rural part of Virginia. He barely even looked at you for the entire 2 hour flight. Mostly staring down at his hands with airpods in, or having his head tilted back and eyes closed. As you neared the end of your trip, jet about to touch down, you noticed Bucky finally didn’t have headphones in, so you decided it would be a good time to set some things straight before you literally went into battle with him.
Cautiously, you spoke up, “Look, I know we don’t necessarily see eye to eye but we really need to-“
He cut you off sharply “Once we touch down I’ll take the northeast side of the compound and you can take the south side. They apparently keep their lab in a big room on the south side, so you head that way and ransack the lab while I take down Haverford, who’s quarters are up in the north end. Got it?” Not even listening to what you had tried to say, Bucky simply started barking out a game plan at you.
“Sure, but I was saying that we-“
Bucky sighed dramatically, “Look Y/N, we just need to do our damn jobs and get this over with. Alright?”
“But Steve said-“
“I don’t care what Steve said.” He snapped, “I’m not here to make nice.”
And with that, you sat in silence again for the last few minutes of the flight. The quinjet landed in an open forrest area, roughly a 10 minute walk away from where Haverford’s compound was supposed to be. Of course, you couldn’t land right next to it without risking them hearing and giving yourselves away. So, you and Bucky began the short trek to the complex, once again in complete silence the whole way there.
Finally, you arrived upon a large monster of a building. It took up almost the entirety of the empty field that it occupied, with no windows around it whatsoever. To anyone else, it looked like from the outside to be just an eery abandoned building. You and Buck snuck around to the backside where a hatch door was used to get into the lower level of the building.
“When we’re done,” Bucky finally spoke for the first time in over 15 minutes “How about we meet up back here at this door, so that we can leave asap and not waste time trying to find each other in this fucking maze. Good?”
You swallowed, remembering the “plan” Bucky had laid out earlier on the jet. You really didn’t feel right about splitting up with him. The compound was massive and neither of you had ever navigated it before. Sure, Steve had shown you a basic floor plan of it and talked about where he believed they were making the serum, but that was it. You didn’t know your way around this territory, and you didn’t know what Haverford’s men were like. And on this mission, it was just you and Buck. You didn’t have the other avengers around to look out for you, or be your eyes and ears over the comms.
“Bucky, I don’t know if we should separate. This place is big.” You finally admitted.
“It’s nothing you can’t handle” He grumbled out, which should have sounded like a compliment but came out as more of something to shut you up and get on with it.
“But what if one of us gets injured or can’t find our way back to the door?” You asked, embarrassed to be admitting your nerves to him. Bucky could see for a moment that you were genuinely anxious about this.
“We have the comms in our ears,” He began in a slightly softer tone than he had ever spoken to you before, “If you need help, just talk to me. I’ll be in your ear the whole time”
You nodded, still a little worried but trying not to show it.
“Splitting up is the fastest way to do this. And the faster we get this done, the less time we have to spend together.” Ah, there was the Bucky you knew. Back to making jabs at you. That was the last you spoke before he broke the door open and you were in.
—————————
As discreetly as possible, you made your way through the compound, quietly trying to get to the south wing without being heard or seen. Steve said that they most likely were keeping their lab in the largest room in the building, which supposedly should be through the last door on the south side. As long as you could find it, get the records and evidence that you needed, and get back to the exit in time to meet Bucky, you’d be fine.
You could hear Bucky through the comms, sounds of grunting and punching obviously coming from him fighting Ian Haverford’s men that he had come into contact with.
“Looking for something princess?” You immediately stopped in your tracks at the sound of a deep sinister voice snarling at you. Whipping around, you saw one of Ian’s goonies standing just a few feet from you.
Instantly he charged at you, but it was nothing you hadn’t ever dealt with. Before he could grab you, you took hold of his arm and twisted it behind his back, affectively turning his entire body away from you. Then, using the Widow’s Bite armor that were around your wrists, you tased him in the neck, causing him to fall completely unconscious.
It was then that you realized you had made it to the end of the hallway, and thus the last door which was supposed to be their lab. Prepared for men to potentially be in there, you unholstered one of your firearms, and promptly kicked down the door.
To your shock, the room had no occupants. You quickly reached over to find a light switch, and what you saw next was infuriating. It indeed was Ian Haverford’s lab. Full of tables and stations that held different mixed drugs and chemicals that he was using to create his own super soldier serum, one that he then used on himself and his accomplices. You also saw a station that was entirely made up of a large desktop connected to multiple computers.
You started to make your way towards the computers so that you could plug in your hard-drive and collect the data that would supply the team with how Haverford had been making the serums. But before you could get there, a white, powdery substance started to sprits down from what looked like emergency sprinklers that were on the ceiling. The substance reeked like chemicals, similar to that of bleach but not as strong. You began to cough a little, trying to wipe the shit out of your face and eyes. You had no idea what the fuck it was or what it might possibly do to you.
“Bucky” you half coughed half called his name into the comms, “Bucky something happened”
“What?” He grunted out, clearly still in the middle of fighting someone.
“I just got sprayed with some kind of white powder stuff. I don’t know what it was. It must have been part of some kind of booby-trap that they had on the lab, since I kicked their door in, it went off.”
“Are you okay?” Bucky immediately asked, seeming genuinely worried.
“Yeah I mean, nothings happened yet, I’m still fine. But-“
“I’m a little busy Y/N, if you’re fine for now, just get the data from the lab and head out fast. I don’t have time to keep talking” he quickly rattled off to you, and you heard a loud scream coming from a guy that Bucky obviously just injured.
You swallowed, still very nervous about whatever the hell just happened to you, but you didn’t want to distract Bucky any further and potentially get him hurt, “Alright. On it.”
Plugging the hard-drive into the main desktop, you waited patiently as thousands of files started to download from Haverford’s database. As you stood there and waited, an annoying, high pitched ringing began to go off in your ears. At the same time, your vision slowly started to blur slightly, as if you were wearing the wrong prescription glasses. A lump formed in your throat and your heart practically dropped into your stomach, you hated to admit it, but this was deeply scaring you. You’d never been poisoned before.
You rubbed your eyes, hoping maybe it would help, but nothing happened, the blurriness just got worse. On top of that, your head started to pound, most likely due to the loud obnoxious ringing. It was the powder, you knew it had to be. What else would just suddenly start causing all this?
“Y/N? You still good?” You heard Bucky ask through the comms, clearly still preoccupied with something else but wanting to check on you.
You debated telling him about your symptoms. You were teammates, he should know. But on the other hand, It was just a few mostly mild symptoms, and the files were almost finished downloading anyway. You’d grab the hard-drive, run out of the compound and meet him in just a few minutes. You could make it until then. Plus, you didn’t wish to further annoy or distract him from fighting.
“Yeah. Still good!” You tried to sound as enthusiastic and convincing as possible. It must have worked, because he didn’t question you further.
Standing over the counter, still waiting for the files to be done, you leaned over the table a bit and made the idiotic decision to close your eyes for just a second, trying to relieve the headache.
A moment later, you felt a sharp, intense fiery pain in your abdomen as someone reached from behind you choking your neck and thrusting a knife into your stomach. You were paralyzed for just a second with fear, not even able to cry out. The ringing in your ears was so bad, you must not have heard anyone come in.
Trying to ignore the pain, you instinctively kicked your right leg back hard, hitting the man in the groin and causing him to fall to the ground. However, on his way down, he didn’t miss the chance to slash you in the calve with the knife he had been holding. The stab was so quick you could only gasp in pain. A gasp Bucky must not have heard as he was fighting his own battles.
Turning around, you fumbled for your firearm for a moment before finally getting it out and being able to pull the trigger, sending a bullet right through his chest. Stumbling backwards a bit, you started to feel lightheaded and you were reminded of the red hot pain in your stomach. You placed a hand over the side the feeling was coming from, and immediately felt a sticky hot liquid coat your fingers.
You didn’t have time however to investigate the stab wound, because as you glanced up, you could see through your blurry vision that 3 more men were walking in through the kicked down door.
Lazily raising your gun again, gripping the table to keep from toppling over, you aimed as best you could, with ringing ears, blurred vision and now two stab wounds. Thankfully, your training in the red room had taught you how to aim with even a blindfold on, and with a few quick shots, the men were taken down, now lying limply on the ground in front of you.
Bucky heard the gunshots through the comm, but since you never called his name or made a noise that would indicate you needed help, he assumed you had it under control.
You let the gun fall from your hand, now that you were alone and for now, out of danger, you were finally able to feel the extent of your injuries as the adrenaline wore off. Ever so slowly, you peered down at your stomach and saw that the hand you’d been holding there was almost entirely now coated in blood. Without meaning to, you fell to your knees, which then painfully reminded you of the other deep wound in your calve. However, you were so tired, and the loss of blood was making it hard to do anything other than focus on breathing.
You knew you needed to alert Bucky. You couldn’t just lie here and wait, you didn’t have that kind of time.
“Bu-Buck” you whimpered, trying to be loud enough that the comm would pick it up. But even just trying to talk was proving to be exhausting. You knew you were losing what was probably a lot of blood. Wet hot tears started to roll down your face, you were dangerously close to just giving in to the blood loss induced exhaustion and closing your eyes.
——————
Bucky, meanwhile, had finished taking down the men on the other half of the facility and was waiting for you outside at the spot you’d both agreed you would meet. He spoke over the comms, “I took down Haverford and his men. I’m out here now. Hurry up.” Short and to the point. How he always was with you.
Immediately, more tears welled in your eyes at hearing his voice. You were desperate, in pain, and exhausted. Despite having a deep distaste for Bucky, you knew you needed him. You needed him to come and find you. You didn’t have enough strength to speak, but luckily the sound of his voice finally brought your own voice back and you mustered up a deep, pathetic and painful whine from the back of your throat…and it was enough to be caught over your ear piece.
He stood there for a few minutes, getting antsy. Especially since he didn’t hear fighting noises over comms, he assumed you were just taking your sweet time making it back to him.
After a bit of waiting he sighed, grumbling “C’mon Y/N, what the fuck could you possibly-“
His complaining ceased as soon as he heard your one singular cry through the comm. Bucky’s eyes went wide, heart dropping into his stomach. He’d never heard a sound like that come out of you before.
“Y/N?” He called your name in an almost scared tone, “Are you okay?”
No response.
Bucky swore under his breath, “I’m coming, just hang on” he made that promise to you like it was an oath, and raced back inside the building.
Sprinting to the side of the compound that you were tasked with handling, Bucky searched frantically through the hallways, popping his head into every room trying to find you….until he did.
You laid there, blood seeping across your shirt and a pool of it surrounding your one injured leg. The men that you had disarmed and killed were sprawled out around you.
After his initial shock wore off, Bucky ran to you, kicking one of the dead arms dealers out of the way to get to you. He dropped to his knees, eyes scanning your wounds.
“Oh, Y/N” He whispered with guilt and sorrow dripping from his tone. A million emotions flashed across his face. Including anger at the men who had attacked you, but mostly at himself for allowing this to happen.
You looked up at him, meeting his eyes, and the tears finally flowed freely now. Aside from the pain, you were relieved. Despite you’re not getting along, in this moment you wanted nothing more than for Bucky to hold you, and tell you everything was going to be just fine.
“Okay” he whispered in a stunned tone, trying to calm both you and himself down. His hands hovered over your body as he took in your wounds and decided what he needed to do.
“Okay, alright.” That time, it came out more sure, “It’s alright, doll. Just keep breathing for me.” He tried to comfort you as he whipped out his phone and let Tony and the team know they needed medical there immediately.
Bucky then swallowed, giving you a remorseful look for what he was about to do.
“Okay sweetheart,” he began tenderly, as he took off the black jacket he had on, and then promptly ripped the sleeve of it off with his metal arm.
“I’m gonna have to tie this around your leg to stop the bleeding. It might hurt a bit, but I gotta do it” He gently explained what he needed to do, waiting to see a sign in your eyes that at least you understood. You gave him a very weak nod, and that was all he needed to then wrap the sleeve tightly around your upper calf.
He was right, it did hurt. But it wasn’t anything you hadn’t expected or weren’t prepared for. However, you believe Bucky only told you about having to wrap your leg, in order to half distract you from what he did next.
A blinding, nauseating pain quickly overcame you as he took the rest of the jacket he had, and with his metal arm and half his body weight, pressed it over your abdominal wound.
You immediately cried out and instinctively reached for Bucky’s arm, trying to push him away.
“Shhh, I know, I know baby” Bucky, who almost sounded pain-stricken himself with guilt, began to hush you, “I know it hurts, but I have to, I have to” He grabbed your hand that had tried to push him away, and let you squeeze the life out of his own as he continued applying pressure. His thumb softly grazed your knuckles, trying to soothe you.
While continuing to comfort you, Bucky began to look around as if he expected someone else to also come to your aid. It was then that he realized he’d need to get you out of the building in order to get you onto the quinjet. There was no way the medical team would be able to find their way around in here to get to you in time. And he could see that you’d already lost a lot of blood, and even with the tourniquet and pressure he applied, you were still losing some.
He took a breath, staring into your eyes with a serious yet remorseful look on his face, “Ok doll, I’m gonna have to pick you up and carry you out, but we can’t let up pressure on your wound” he explained, “So, I’m gonna need your help.”
Bucky then took the hand of yours that he was holding and gently guided it over to your abdomen. Lifting the jacket, he placed your hand over your own wound, you whimpered a little at the contact. Bucky swallowed, “I know doll, but I need you to put pressure on it like I was, okay? Can you do that for me?” He looked at you pleadingly, praying that you understood what he was saying.
Having to bite your own lip to keep from crying out again, you started to press down on your stomach with the little strength you still had. Bucky could tell you were trying by your obvious change in facial expression, “That’s it. Just like that, that’s my girl” he praised, quickly swiping one of your tears away. It wasn’t a lot of pressure, but it would do.
Ever so gently, trying to avoid hurting your injured leg, Bucky gracefully slipped his arms underneath you and scooped you up, holding you close to his chest. You moaned a little at the shift in movement, “Shhh, I got you doll. I got you” he whispered into your hair as you shoved your face in the crook of his neck.
He quickly made his way back out of the compound with you in his arms, thanking god when he saw the medevac quinjet was already out there waiting for you guys. Bucky tenderly laid you down on the stretcher, taking hold of your hand again as soon as he was able.
“She was poisoned with something and then stabbed in her lower left calve and left quadrant of her abdomen” He immediately started rambling off what had happened to the medical team and Dr. Cho.
“Poisoned with what?” Someone asked, he didn’t see who it was cause he wasn’t taking his eyes off of you.
“I- I don’t know.” Bucky admitted, “I think she said it was white and powdery, I can’t remember.” Internally, he was kicking himself so hard for not having immediately ran to you when you told him about the poison. He shouldn’t have just written you off and told you to deal with it. He shouldn’t have done a lot of things.
Bucky sat on the little bench in the quinjet right next you, still holding your hand, while the team got to work on your injuries. Technically, he should have been sitting at the front of the jet, out of their way, but no one was going to tell an upset Bucky Barnes what to do.
As they began working your leg, removing the tourniquet and getting a shot of lidocaine ready to numb the area, you saw them preparing the syringe out of the corner of your eye. You begin to hyperventilate, letting out a small whimper of fear. You hated all things medical, which stemmed from a deep rooted fear that dated back to your red room days. After years of being practically experimented on and shot up with god knows what, you didn’t particularly love the sight of needles. Even if you knew you were in a safe environment.
Bucky, who was still diligently sitting right beside you, immediately recognized your anxious reaction. He too knew that fear all too well. While he didn’t like to admit it, his time as the winter solider and being left at the hands of hydra often caused him to have visceral reactions to medical paraphernalia.
“Hey, hey” he softly called to you as he gently held your chin and brought your face to meet his, “It’s alright doll, you don’t have to look down there. Just look at me. Right at me.” He held your eyes, squeezing your hand a little tighter to let you know he was there. “That’s it. Just keep looking at me, Y/N. I’m right here” And that’s how you eventually went unconscious, staring into Bucky’s eyes as he quietly shushed you and ran his hand through your hair.
——————
The harsh lights of the medical wing practically blinded you as you tried to let your eyes slowly adjust to your surroundings.
“Hey hon” you heard a soft voice coming from your right side, whom you instantly recognized as Natasha.
“Well there she is” another voice, coming from your left who you thought was Steve, spoke up, sounding relieved at the fact you were awake. Your suspicions were proven correct when Steve leaned over slightly into your line of view.
“Welcome back, Y/N” he smiled, clearly exhausted but delighted by your opened eyes.
Your voice came out raspy and weak as you spoke for the first time, “H-how long have I been out?”
Natasha grabbed a cup from off your bedside table and offered you some water as Steve answered you,
“About three days. They had to get the bleeding under control and repair a portion of your stomach that was perforated. They also gave you some antibiotics to combat whatever the hell it was you were poisoned with,” he explained, “they seem to be working though. Doc says as soon as you’re strong enough, you can finish recuperating in your own room” He ended his spiel with a smile, but there was still one question he hadn’t answered that you were desperate for.
“W-Where’s Bucky?” You wondered why he wasn’t here, as you didn’t see him next to Steve or Nat.
“He’s right here, Y/N” Steve motioned to the back of the room where you couldn’t see, but Bucky was standing in the corner, eyes red and sunken in like he’d been crying. He immediately picked his head up when he heard you mention him.
“He hasn’t left this room in three days” Steve whispered to you in a hushed tone, hoping Bucky couldn’t hear him.
Nat cleared her throat, “We’re just gonna go get some coffee” she looked at Steve and jerked her head towards the door, beckoning him to follow her. They both left, leaving you and Bucky to yourselves.
Slowly, Buck made his way over to your bed, taking the seat that Steve was just in.
He was almost fearful of what to say, surprised that you had even asked for him in the first place. He blamed himself entirely for what happened, and was positive that when you woke up, you’d want nothing to do with him. And he wouldn’t blame you.
“Hey doll” he croaked out, voice sounding strained, “How’re you feeling?”
You swallowed, “My stomach hurts, and I have a headache” you admitted, still in a bit of pain from your wound healing.
Bucky nodded, “Do you want me to get the doctor? They might be able to give you more pain meds.” He asked, wanting to make sure you were as comfortable as possible. You didn’t know, but for the past three days Bucky had remained diligently at your bedside, alerting medical staff of any slight change in vital signs or if he thought you were cold and needed more blankets. He’d only left a few brief times when Steve had to force him to go eat or use the bathroom.
You shook your head, “no, no I’m okay. Promise” You offered him a slight smile.
Bucky stared down at his hands for a moment before he spoke up again, “Y/N, I am so so so sorry. This never would’ve happened if I had just listened to you and not had us split up.” He spoke with such guilt and shame you almost felt bad for him, “I was so focused on my own agenda and being a dick to you, that I completely ignored when you needed help. I can’t even-“
“Buck,” you interrupted him, reaching over and grabbing his hand with the little strength you had, “this isn’t your fault. It’s the fault of the men who stabbed me. That’s it. No one else’s” As much as you knew he fucked up with the way he treated you, you certainly didn’t think he should have to take responsibility for you getting hurt.
“But if I had come as soon as you said you were poisoned, if I had just listened to you instead of choosing to be an asshole, you probably wouldn’t be in this hospital bed” he insisted, eyes getting watery.
“Well, you were an asshole, I’ll give you that.” You smirked at him, trying to get him to relax, “but you also saved my life.” Bucky looked up at you, “You tied the tourniquet which kept me from losing more blood, and then made sure I didn’t have a panic attack on the quinjet. You might have fucked up a little Bucky, but you certainly made up for it” you gave his hand a little squeeze.
For the first time since you went under surgery, Bucky smiled, “All the same, I’m never separating from you during missions ever again.”
You playfully rolled your eyes, “that sounds a little suffocating, don’t you think?”
He shook his head, “Nope. Not to me. Nothings ever happening to you while you’re under my watch again”
“Well if that’s the case,” you scooted over a little in the bed, “will you keep me warm before I freeze to death in here?” You were genuinely very cold and were hoping for someone to bring you another blanket, but you supposed having Bucky there would do.
He chuckled softly, “you got it.” Lowering the hospital bed rail, Bucky climbed in and laid down next you, pulling you up close to him with his arm around your shoulders.
He placed a brief kiss along your hairline, “get some rest, doll. I’ll be right here.”
————-
Taglist: @patzammit @dpaccione @fdl305 @gh0stgurl
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky x reader#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barns x y/n#bucky barnes#bucky barnes enemies to lovers#bucky barnes angst#bucky barnes fluff#Bucky Barnes x red room reader#bucky barnes x avenger!reader
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for the red rooms in devildom, imagine lucifer finally deciding to give red rooms a shot when he realizes mc will soon leave devildom and/or keeps rejecting his affection
Lucifer being the avatar of pride means he can’t exactly handle rejection. Maybe a few times at first, seeing it as a way to chase and have fun and to prove himself to you and sweep you off of your feet, but after a while it really gets under his skin.
Why? Why are you denying him? Sure he can understand being scared of him, he’s one of the most powerful demons after all, and sadly you were more than once on the wrong end of that ire and anger when you first arrived. He won’t deny that your emotions with those incidents are possibly why you wouldn’t want to be with him, but surely now you see hes trying to make amends? That he’d kiss the ground you walk on and make sure to keep you safe?
It seems you were serious about denying and rejecting his affections. You tell everyone at dinner what a wonderful time you’ve had, and how in three days time you’re expected to leave, back to the human world, leaving them to wallow in your absence.
Well, you won’t get away with that. He won’t let you make this mistake. He just gives a soft smile, a gentle hug, and tells you that he’ll miss you, but as you head up to bed and listen to Mammon and Levi’s blabbering and sobbing, Lucifer decides to make a rather last resort call.
The Red Rooms. The last place he ever wanted to bring you. While they care for the darling's experience, he doesn’t want to have to force this, but you’re really leaving him no choice!
He’ll make sure the rooms are to your tastes. Stuffed animals to cry into when overwhelmed, softer gags to be easier on your jaw, padded cuffs to make sure your delicate human skin isn’t bruised unless he decides to bruise it himself.
The demon chuckles on the other end of the line but once they hear who’s making the call, they shut up and show respect.
“Nothing rough. This is to prove my devotion and how I’m better than my brothers. I want only the best, the softest, the cleanest and the safest. I won’t hesitate to kill you and wring your blood into my food to devour. Do we have an understanding?”
He goes through the list, his mind getting even more perverted than Asmo as he pictures how he’ll make you moan and whimper for him. “Oh? Well I must admit that golden hellfire newt syrup would be a nice touch but I'm as ready as ill need to be. Yes, I'm aware it's a potent aphrodisiac but I assure you, my love and lust know no bounds when it comes to my sweet little minx”
The call goes on a little longer, Lucifer giving some final details on safety measures, only giving Diavolo's emergency number in case he completely loses himself, and so on. Who woulda thought the demons in the seediest parts of the underworld would be so caring? Then again it’s rumored Barbatos and Diavolo run the palace in disguise so…
When asked how they are to bring you in, Lucifer just smiles and tries not to break the phone in an angered crush. To think they’d touch you, it just sent a pang of anger through his core. But he knows they’re simply doing their job, so he can’t exactly kill them just yet.
“I’ll use the spells you have on hand, or ill bring them in myself under a guise of a last dinner together. You’ll know it's me by what I'm wearing. None of this better go wrong, or I assure you, you wont live to warn the others of my wrath”.
-Mommabean (HI! I hope you likes this bean!!)
#yandere imagines#yandere scenarios#mommabean#yandere obey me#yandere lucifer#yandere demons#yandere red rooms au#yandere red rooms#yandere male#yandere x reader#pride bean#bean asks#bean confessions
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Batfamily headcanons with batsis that used to be a Black Widow please?
Note: Thank you for requesting, I hope this is okay as I don't tend to write headcanons a lot, but I had fun with this and I thought that the idea was so cool!
The first time they met you, you had taken them by surprise, which was unusual for them as being vigilantes meant that they were always on high alert.
⛤ They were on patrol and you had snuck past them, taking out the criminals before they even had time to blink and then pinning them down from behind.
⛤ Although they were skeptical at first, it hadn't taken long for the four boys to develop a liking for you, especially Damian who was in complete awe of the way fought and slunk around the streets, although you would be lying if you said that he wasn't the teeniest bit jealous.
⛤ They saw you a few times after that. Your training made you hard to track down, but they were skilled to and with some digging, Tim had managed to find you.
⛤ You all became thick as thieves after that, often going out on patrol with each other.
⛤ And soon Bruce invited you to stay.
⛤ At first, you were hesitant. Your time in the Red Room had lead you to develop some trust issues but you took a leap and boy were you glad you did.
⛤ There is always something to do with the vigilantes; training, reading, watching movies. and you quickly became a part of their weekly routines.
⛤They love having you around too, often asking you to help them with their stealth and training.
⛤ You had to work around the assassinations with Bruce because they broke his 'no killing rule.', but after discussing with him and Jason, the three of you came to a suitable compromise and you become a huge part of protecting Gotham and of their lives.
⛤ You would do anything to protect them as they would for you.
#Batfamily x reader#dc x reader#batfamily headcanons#marvel x dc#batfam x reader#batfam x sister reader#black widow#red room#writing#head cannons
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when he loves you
characters: red-haired shanks, gn!reader
warnings: fluff
a/n:
- i'll take requests for more of this "series"!!! i kinda wanna do sanji and ace hehe
- HOLY SHIT HE'S SO FINE!!!! LIKE DAMN- OMG SHANKS??? SHANKS?!?!?!
- feedback is appreciated!
part one (shanks) // part two (ace) // part three (buggy)
when shanks loves you, there is no doubt about it. it's so painfully obvious when he's in love, heart fluttering as if he's an old school boy and butterflies in his stomach erupting whenever you're around him. the blush on his cheeks rivals the shade of red his infamous hair and his tongue turns to lead around you.
"benn, shut up!" shanks whisper-shouts, pressing his hand over his face and trying to cover up as much of his blushing face as possible. his voice is muffled yet anyone could hear the whine in his voice. "y/n can hear you!"
his black-haired first mate simply sighs heavily, resigned to his fate as shanks' cupid. "that's the whole point, captain!"
shanks points at him, cheeks flushed.
"not another word!"
benn only rolls his eyes but shanks could see the glimmer of amusement in them.
when shanks loves you, you learn to love his way of expressing affection - physical affection. whether it is him holding you by the waist in a death grip whenever a storm hits whilst he's steering the wheel or at the quiet moments in the middle of the night and he's the little spoon embraced by you, you learn to love the amount of warmth he emits and the little featherlight kisses he presses on instinct.
"mhmm," shanks sighs and scoots closer to you. he buries himself in your arms, smiling widely. "this feels...nice...."
you pet his hair, and the grin expands. he loves the way your fingers gently ran through his messy red hair, careful to not pull any knots, and the soothing action almost makes him fall asleep.
"you like this?" you tease and even with his eyes closed, shanks could imagine the way your eyes would twinkle.
"yeah," shanks presses a kiss to the underside of your jaw before nuzzling into you. taking a deep breath of your scent, he mumbles something one last time before falling asleep.
"i love it."
when shanks loves you, there is nothing in the world holding him back from showing just how much he loves you. he's an emperor, what's the point of coveting so much berry when he can spend it all on you? there's no greater joy than seeing the look on your face when he comes back, gifts in tow. even though you chide him for spending so much berry on you, you're grinning nonetheless and his heart stops. it's a routine on every island he and his crew stop at, one that he intends to do until he can't anymore.
"shanks!" you run down the plank and tackle him in a hug. his arm cradles the back of your head, pushing it closer to him as if he's trying to mold you together with him. "you're back!"
"always, love," he gives you a light kiss before picking up the almost-forgotten bags. he shakes them, smiling. "got you something."
you sigh playfully but took it in hand. gosh- the way your eyes glittered and the way you kept biting your lip to prevent the big smile from erupting on your face...shanks would do anything to keep it there.
"you can't keep buying me more stuff! spend the berry on your crew!"
although you say this, shanks knows, without a doubt, that you're going to squeal over each item he bought and keep them pristine in your cupboard. including the cheesy (you called it cringe) mug that red '#1 lover!!' and the matching ('cliche' you called it) pair of silly duck shoes., you'll treasure them all.
when shanks loves you, he loves you. heart, soul, mind, body, you can have it all, as long as he can have you in return.
"i like you," shanks says, cheeks blushing as he confesses to you first.
"love ya," he presses a kiss to your head as you wake up, a giant grin on his face as always.
"i love you," shanks cradles your face in his, hand shaking as he realizes that he could have lost you. he would do anything to bring you back if that happened; hell hath no fury like a pirate scorned when he found your murderer. he realizes that the moment the sword descended on you and almost pierced through skin that perhaps...perhaps you were the 'one' that rayleigh mentioned all the time. "i love you, y/n. don't ever leave me...please."
#one piece#one piece x reader#red haired shanks#shanks#akagami no shanks#shanks one piece#shanks x reader#red-haired shanks x reader#akagami no shanks x reader#his crew be like: urgh get a room#shanks: I'M TRYING TO!!!#he's so hot#LITERALLY HUSBAND MATERIAL???#HEADCANON HIM BEING WORLD NUMBER ONE BEST HUSBAND#LIKE HE'S SO GREEN FLAG CODED
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All assassins need a cat
masterlist
summary: since your rescue from the Red Room you had been living in the tower, and it didn’t take you long to realise that ex-assassins simply need a cat
pairing: Winterwidow x widow teen reader, Natasha x widow teen reader, Bucky x widow teen reader
warnings: cats
genre: fluff
words: 1602
a/n: I really want a cat, so I figured I'd write something short about it :)
You do not have my permission to repost, copy or translate my work
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Living in the Avengers tower had been nothing short of amazing. The people were kind, the food was even better. After living in the Red Room for so long you were overwhelmed with the freedom you were given, and the choices you could make.
You had been in the tower for two months now, and although you liked almost everyone that lived in the tower, you preferred Natasha and Bucky the most.
They were kind, and because of your shared life experience it was easy to get along with them. They understood you, and there was no pressure in talking to them. You knew that whatever you told them, they would understand. It was comforting.
However, it didn't take very long before you realised that both Natasha and Bucky owned a cat.
It happened during a movie night. Natasha and Bucky had sworn to catch you up on all the great movies you missed. While watching the entirety of the Indiana Jones movies, a small, black cat jumped up on the bed, snuggling against Natasha.
After you asked who the cat was, Natasha explained that she got her after living in the tower for a while. She said it helped her feel better about herself, and her past.
‘Liho,’ as Natasha told you she was called, took a liking to you rather quickly. It didn't take many movie nights before Liho wasn’t only snuggling on Natasha's lap, but also climbing on yours.
During breakfast with Natasha and Bucky later that week, you spotted a white cat joining you in the kitchen. It walked up to Bucky and started yelling at him for food. Bucky picked the cat up, snuggling with it for a few seconds before grabbing some food, feeding it.
“That's Alpine,” Bucky had explained, telling you how he had gotten a cat not long after Natasha did.
Bucky and Natasha didn't share a floor when they had gotten their cats, but when they moved in together it didn't take long before the cats became friendly with each other. Natasha had told you how you could often find them snuggled up together.
After meeting both cats, you could often be found cuddling with them.
When you were sitting in your room, you would leave your door open, allowing the cats to enter whenever they pleased. Often, they would wander into your room, either jumping on your bed or jumping on your lap while you entertained yourself.
They started following you around the house soon after, always begging for cuddles and kisses. You cheerfully obliged, and it didn't go unmissed by either Bucky or Natasha.
Natasha had brought up the idea one night, after you had fallen asleep in their room.
She shared her thoughts with Bucky, discussing how it might be good for you to get a cat of your own. You loved the cats that were already living in the house, and both Natasha and Bucky thought it would be great for you to raise a cat of your own.
At breakfast a week later Natasha brought it up again.
“How would you feel about getting another cat…?” Natasha asked carefully, bringing up the question casually so as to not make you suspicious.
“You want another cat?” You asked cheerfully, petting Liho behind her ears as she settled on your lap.
Natasha nodded. “It might be fun for Liho and Alpine to get another play buddy.”
Bucky nodded along, settling in the seat next to you.
“Besides, we were thinking, you might like one of your own…” Bucky explained carefully, but your gasp of excitement washed all their worries away.
“I could get a cat?!” You asked excitedly, watching as Natasha chuckled before nodding.
“If that’s something that you want,” she explained, sitting into the seat across from you. “I still have the contact information from the same people I bought Liho from. They have another nest and are looking for homes for the kittens,” Natasha told you, biting into her toast.
“We could go have a look if you want,” she finished.
Another gasp of excitement left your lips. “I could get a kitten? We can go look at kittens?!” you exclaimed happily.
Natasha and Bucky both nodded, chuckling a bit.
“We can visit today,” Bucky explained.
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After finishing your breakfast quickly, you had gotten into the car, heading over to the address that had the kittens. On the way, Natasha told you that the kittens were already old enough to leave the nest, so if there were a kitten that you had a connection with, you would be able to take it home the same day.
You happily stared out the window, humming along to the song on the radio as your excitement grew.
Once inside the house, you were practically jumping from excitement, sighing a little when Natasha, Bucky, you, and the other two people sat down at the table to greet each other and catch up.
Natasha noticed your impatience, grabbing your hand under the table and rubbing soothing circles on it, assuring you that you would get to meet the kittens soon.
After a tedious half hour, the woman finally got up, leading you towards a different room where all the kittens were.
Once you were finally inside, you gasped in excitement when all the kittens ran towards your legs, playing with your shoelaces.
You went to sit on the ground, smiling as all the kittens started exploring around you, inspecting you. Natasha moved to sit next to you, lifting a kitten into her lap and cuddling with it.
After playing with the kittens for a little while, you found out that the mother cat was actually one of Liho's siblings, so you would be adopting a cat of Liho’s family.
You were in the kitten room for about two hours, and you had grown especially close to one little kitten. It was the smallest one, and she was sleepy and shy when you first came in. After about half an hour, she did come over to you, sniffing you for a bit before deciding that you were the perfect place to take a nap. She climbed on your leg and started sleeping.
“Can we have this one?” you asked Natasha as you carefully petted the young cat's body, allowing her to rest.
“She does really like you,” the woman said, cuddling with the mother cat.
Bucky stood in the corner, observing you and his girlfriend as you had a bonding moment. He loved Natasha more than anything, and you were slowly becoming just as important to him. He loved both of you, and he wanted to give you this moment together. He knew how much it meant to Natasha to be a mother, and he was certain it meant a lot to you as well.
Natasha nodded excitedly, giving the kitten on your lap a little snuggle.
“I wish we were able to take them all. They are all so cute,” Natasha said as she lifted another kitten from the ground, holding it close to her and giving it some kisses.
The woman stood up, walking over to Bucky.
“If you could come with me, I will get you all the medical papers and get everything sorted out.”
Bucky nodded and followed the woman out of the room, leaving you and Natasha to snuggle with the kittens a little longer.
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After getting everything sorted you had taken the sleeping kitten into your lap, snuggling with it while you sat on the backseat.
You were more than happy with your new best friend, and both Natasha and Bucky were more than happy because of the fact you were so happy. You cuddled with the cat a little more before you as well fell asleep.
When you woke up again you were back in the Avengers tower, sleeping on Natasha’s and Bucky's bed while Natasha read a book.
“Good afternoon my little Malyshka,” she said when she noticed you were awake. She closed her book, setting it aside and brushing some of your hair out of your face. You groaned and blinked a few times before sitting up, noticing the weight that pressed on your legs. Your little kitten was still fast asleep.
You smiled and reached down to pet her, enjoying the purring she made as she snuggled closer into your hand.
“Thank you, Natasha,” you said as you looked at her, smiling when she gave you a kiss on your forehead.
“Anything for you, my little Malyshka,” Natasha said as she cupped your cheeks, giving you another kiss on your nose.
“Leave some snuggles for me,” you heard Bucky say from the door opening, watching as he walked inside and crawled into the bed, on the other side of you.
You smiled and leaned forward, giving him a little kiss on your cheek.
Bucky smiled as well. “Thank you little miss,” he said jokingly as he leaned forwards as well, giving you a little kiss on your forehead.
Your kitten started making some noises, waking up and taking in its surroundings. Once her eyes landed on you, she crawled higher up your legs, settling onto your chest as you leaned against Natasha. It didn't take long before the kitten fell asleep again, enjoying your gentle pets and kisses.
“Another movie?” Natasha questioned as she observed your state, realising she would not be getting out of the bed for a while.
You nodded happily, snuggling close into her side as she started the movie, stroking your hair.
“Thank you,” you sighed contently before falling asleep as well, safe in the arms of your found family.
Permanent tags: @marvelnatasha12346 @lesbionion @nova-kyle @darkstar225 @saraaahsstuff @marvelwomenarehot0 @screechcat @iheartjohansson @tia-thesimp @swaqcenix @karmasgxrl @marvel-lous3000 @n0txn3vee @lorsstar1st
#black widow#marvel#natasha x reader#mcu#avengers#natasha romanoff#marvel reader insert#natasha x daughter#natasha x reader platonic#winterwidow x daughter#winterwidow x reader#winterwidow#the winter soldier#bucky barnes x reader#buckynat#bucky#bucky x reader#james bucky buchanan barnes#natasha romanov#black widow x reader#reader insert#x reader#black widow reader#widow reader#red room reader
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You are you. - natasha romanoff
Summary: Natasha doesn’t believe she’s her own person, so Y/n reminds her she is.
Warnings: Angst?? i guess, sad Natasha, mentions of the Red Room.
a/n: i apologise if this is short and bad 😭 i wrote it on a walk like 20 minutes ago lmfao
You and Natasha where currently in the lounge of the avengers compound, it was very late. Neither of you knew why you were still up, but it seemed to be a common occurrence.
You waddled into the room with two glasses of water placed firmly in your hands, but as you glanced over at Natasha you felt something was off. She was staring off into the distance, and the glow that was in her eyes when you left the room had gone. You frowned.
“What’s wrong, natty?” You asked as you put the water down on the coffee table and sat down next to her.
She came out of her trance and her once glassy eyes met yours with a blank expression, and when she smiled, it didn’t reach them.
“Nothing.” She hummed, you raised an eyebrow at her. “Nat.” She looked away from you, avoiding your gaze.
“I just..” She paused, seeming unable to get the words out. You reached forward and took her hand, holding it reassuringly.
She let out a deep breath. “I’m not me. I’ll never be me. I’ll always be a product of the red room, i’ll never be a genuine person. Everything i am, came from there.”
You frowned, you knew that wasn’t true, everyone that knew Natasha knew that was not true. “That’s not true.” You said, but you knew she didn’t believe you.
“It is. Everything i am, an assassin, my ‘best’ features; bravery, willingness to fight, lack of fear. It comes from there.” She said as she looked away from you. You brought a soft hand to her cheek, gently moving her face so she was looking at you.
“That is not true.” You said, it was genuine. “You know what i think?” You asked as your thumb ran up and down on her cheek, she shook her head gently.
“I think all of that came from your mother, your bravery, your passion, your love. Every plus and every flaw. You’re a strong woman, Natasha. You’re still here, which is something not a lot of people in your situation would be able to achieve. You didn’t get the way you love from the red room, nor the way you stand up to every challenge. You are not the red room, Natasha. You are you.”
You said, you meant every word.
Her eyes became glassy again, expect this time it was from tears. She took a shaky breath in before speaking. “You really think so?” Her voice was quiet; weak. You nodded, “I really do.”
She moved forward, leaning into you. You held her as she cuddled up to you, her knees moving up to her chest.
“I love you, Natasha. All of you.” You hummed against her hair, kissing atop of it. All you got back was a weak sob, but that’s all you needed.
#natasha romanoff#natasha romanoff angst#natasharomanofffluff#natasharomanoffredroom#red room#marvel#angst#black widow#black widow angst#soft#foryou#natasha romanoff x reader#natasha x reader#natasha romanov#natalia alianovna romanova#natasha romanoff x fem reader#natasha x y/n#scarlett johansson
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pls write forever-
um just thinking about how pussy drunk jason is, like he loves eating you out and making you come over and over again- like he wants his face between your thighs, or you sitting on his face riding his tounge like a bitch in heat, and he would be so teasing, oh my god-
TYSM!!!!!
Jason Todd is addicted to pussy!!! He starts off smug. He takes off your underwear and when he sees how wet you are, he says, “looks like someone wants me. don’t you, baby? all ready for me. perfect, aren’t you?” He laughs when you dig your nails into his scalp. Don’t worry though, he has to worship your thighs first. He’ll take his sweet time teasing you.
Once Jason starts actually eating you out though, all of his coherent thoughts are out the window. The only time he stops is when he says “sit on my face, please. please, baby. want you to sit on my face. wanna feel you. wanna taste you. please-”
Once you’re situated, he grabs your thighs and pulls down. His hands squeeze your thighs, he loves them. He’s putting his all into eating you out. If he had to choose between getting a blow job or eating you out, he’d eat you out every single time.
He grabs your hips and starts fucking your cunt on his mouth. You can feel him moaning in your core and it’s sending you over the edge and Jason clearly doesn’t plan on stopping-
#my roommates have to think I’m insane. squealing to myself in my room.#jason todd#jason todd x reader#red hood#red hood x reader#jason todd smut#jason todd x reader smut#red hood smut#red hood x reader smut#smut#saph’s love letters#saph’s thots#anon#jason todd imagine#jason todd x you#jason todd x fem!reader#jason todd x afab!reader
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His Saviour | Part 1
Steve Rogers x Reader
Summary: You disobey one of Steve's orders in a mission but you don't think about the consequences...
Warnings: (TRIGGER WARNING!) mentions of self harm and suicide, mentions of killing and torturing, pure Angst no happy ending, mentions of injures, dark!Steve Rogers, swearing, minor spoilers of Black Widow, Steve being an asshole in general
Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader
Featuring: The original 6
Disclaimer: please don't read this if you're not comfortable with any of the topics below or/and if they trigger you. This is just a fiction and it's never ok to act like this. I'm not romanticizing any of these topics and this behaviour!
You are sitting in the Quinjet, observing everyone who is injured in different ways. Natasha has been stabbed in her right thigh, Clint’s left ankle has been twisted, and Bruce, although not injured, appears exhausted due to a significant code green call, during which Nat almost lost him trying to retrieve him. Thor has a few scratches on his face. Everyone’s faces show bruising in different areas, and their bodies are still aching. But you, you have been injured the most. Your right wrist is broken, and you have been shot in your left leg, though the bullet wasn’t deep and didn't cause major damage; otherwise, you probably would have passed out by now. You still have trouble breathing, and your voice is sore because one of the HYDRA agents almost choked you to death. Your face is bruised, you can only open your right eye halfway, and your lips are swollen. The numbness has made it so you can barely feel any pain. When everyone saw you upon returning to the jet, they were extremely worried. You didn’t possess inhuman powers and weren't a super soldier, but you used to be a well-trained assassin and spy in the Red Room, closely partnered with Natasha Romanoff before joining S.H.I.E.L.D. So, it was surprising for the team to see you so battered, though they understood the mission was challenging.
Everyone needed a break upon returning to the tower. Initially, everyone thought it was a straightforward mission: infiltrate a high-security HYDRA base, get two flash drives containing vital and dangerous information, and exit. What no one knew was that it was a trap, with far more agents present than expected. Eventually, you managed to escape, but only securing one of the flash drives.
As everyone settled back in the jet, Bruce finished removing the bullet from your leg and bandaging Nat’s thigh. Thor bragged to Tony about his usual lack of injuries on missions, joking that he could have taken down all the HYDRA agents that day if he hadn’t been 'unlucky', which elicited laughter from Tony. Clint checked on Nat while she recounted a memory from Budapest. Meanwhile, you contemplated going home for a long shower until you noticed Steve, whose eyes were fixed on you with intensity. Confused, you assumed he was lost in thought, but you were wrong.
“How could you be so reckless?!" Steve's voice boomed through the jet as he stood up from his seat, his gaze piercing into yours. Everyone stopped what they were doing, surprised by his uncharacteristically loud tone, given his usually calm demeanor, even when upset. You looked at him, uncertain of what to say. You understood why he was angry; you had disobeyed an order. However, if not for your 'disobedience,' you wouldn't have acquired half the information you have now. To you, this seemed like Steve Rogers throwing a typical Captain America tantrum.
“Well, are you going to answer, or are you too stupid to respond to a simple question?" he growled, advancing toward your seat.
“I wasn't being-" you began to mutter, only to be interrupted by Steve.
“Speak up," he demanded, his voice cutting you off. You met his gaze, puzzled by his demeanor.
“I wasn't being reckless; I was being thoughtful. The-" you tried to explain, but Steve interrupted again.
"Thoughtful?! You call that thoughtful?! Really, Y/n? It's clear you don't understand the difference between stupidity and thoughtfulness.” he retorted.
“Will you stop interrupting me?" you interjected, your voice growing louder as you rose from your seat. You locked eyes with Steve, standing almost chest to chest in front of each other.
“I wouldn't have interrupted you if I knew any useful words were going to come out of your mouth," he countered, finally yelling, causing everyone but you to flinch.
“You have no right to yell at me like this, Steve.” you asserted, standing up for yourself.
"I have EVERY right to yell at you, you-" he began, but you cut him off this time.
"Why are you making it seem like I committed a crime? Yes, I agree it was wrong for me to enter that room alone, but I retrieved the flash drive we needed, didn't I?" you challenged.
“That is not the point right now. The point is, I'm your captain, and I gave a strict, direct order not to enter that room, and you disobeyed me.” he stated firmly.
That was all true. When you disobeyed his order, you knew he would be angry, but not to this extent.
You sprinted down the hallway, incapacitating every HYDRA agent in your path. You tried not to use your gun too often, knowing there would likely be guards in the room.
"Steve, I found the room," you said through your earpiece. You subdued the agent guarding the room where the flash drives were, and as the door swung open, more than twenty HYDRA agents stood before you, blocking your view of the drives on the computer table.
“Y/n, what did you just say? Get out of there now! Do you even know how many agents are in there?" Steve's urgent voice echoed in your ear.
“I do now," you replied, still facing the agents, who were also eyeing you cautiously.
"Y/n, this is an order. Get. Out. Of. There. Now.” Steve commanded, his tone almost a shout.
“Sorry, Steve, but people's lives depend on this.” you declared, charging toward the agents, disregarding Steve's pleas for you to retreat.
“Steve, I really don't understand what the big deal is. I got one of the drives, and yes, I went alone, but at least I obtained something that will help us.” you reasoned, taking a seat.
“Alright, y/n, I'm definitely sure now that you are deaf. You entered a room with so many HYDRA agents-" he began, only to be cut off by you.
“They were like 10 and they were really weak-" you defended.
“They were 27 trained assassins!” he corrected, making you widen your eyes.
"And do I need to remind you that your leg has been shot, and you can barely keep your eyes open, not to mention the rest of your injuries." he added mockingly.
“Okay, Steve, I get it, and I'm sorry for being reckless. Can we let this go now?" you pleaded, sitting down.
“Let this go?!" he started laughing, though his laugh lacked any humor. Everyone looked at Steve, unable to believe his behavior. They never expected him to speak to you this way, especially in front of the whole team.
You and Steve had been friends since meeting during the Battle of New York. You had a lot in common and quickly connected. A few months later, at one of Tony's parties, he kissed you, and the following day, he asked you out. It had been six months since then, and Steve treated you like a princess. He called you his savior because you helped him adjust to life after being thawed from the ice. He adored you. You had a few minor disagreements, but they were hardly fights, more like disagreements. You could never stay mad at each other, and now you couldn't believe the man who was laughing at you and humiliating you was the same person.
"Steve, I think that's enough," Nat finally intervened, her voice calm yet firm.
"Is it really? I think baby y/n hasn't learned her lesson yet.” Steve retorted sarcastically.
“Fuck you, Steve. You can't speak to me like that. I'm not a kid. If it wasn't for me, we wouldn't even have that one drive, and god knows how many people could have died. But you can't even realize that because I disobeyed ‘Captain America's orders,' and no one is allowed to disobey America's 'hero.' The only kid between us is you!” you shot back, your voice rising, though not as loud as Steve's had been.
“I'm a kid, y/n? Really? And what are you, a hero? Do you expect me to thank you now? Do you expect all of us to be on our knees thanking you?!" Steve challenged.
“That is not what I said!" you finally snapped.
The tension in the room escalated, and the team grew more uncomfortable by the second.
Steve smirked at your angered state.
“What's the matter, y/n? You seem a little bit defensive. I thought you liked being a hero. You know, because of the guilt, since you started killing and torturing people at the age of 8.”he said, still wearing the hurtful smirk on his face.
The whole team gasped, especially Natasha, whose story paralleled yours. You looked at Steve, unable to believe what he had just said.
“You seem shocked, Agent y/l/n. Oh, and Natasha, don't take this the wrong way. We all make mistakes in our life, but at least after we realize our mistakes, we try to make them up as soon as we can and not run away like a coward.” Steve continued, ignoring your reaction. You and Natasha widened your eyes, understanding what Steve was referring to."Steve..." Nat began, but Steve cut her off.
“I'm not done yet. Some of y'all look confused, well, let me explain it for you," Steve said, addressing the rest of the team.
"Steve, don't." you murmured, your voice weak now. You weren't even sure if anyone heard you, and you were right. No one heard you, but Steve who chose to ignore you.
“Our dear y/n y/l/n was a well-trained assassin back in the years with Natasha Romanoff in a place called the Red Room, which I'm sure you've heard about. Before even Natasha was out of there, Agent y/l/n found a way to leave the Red Room, a way to save every girl, from children to adults, who were mind-controlled into killing, and even worse. But do you know what she did instead?" he turned around the room, looking at everyone as if it was a show. No one said anything; they just kept looking between you and Steve. It was getting harder for you to focus on your breathing.
“Well, in case you haven't guessed yet, she just left everyone who could've been saved, even her best friend who is sitting right here with us.” he said, pointing at Nat.
“And even though she could've killed Dreykov, who was the leader by the way, with her genius plan, she didn't because she was a coward.” he said, emphasizing the word coward.
You've never felt so small and betrayed. You couldn’t believe he was using your awful past against you. When you confided in him, he comforted you, assuring you it wasn't your fault. That you’ve been through a lot and you took the only chance you had to save yourself. And now… now he was a different person.
“Cap that’s enough, it’s not our business what she did in the past. We all did something in some point that we aren’t proud of. She made up for that mistake many times now, since the battle of New York until today’s mission. I’m sure she still feels guilty and you’re just making it worse.” Tony looked at your trembling sight, standing up from his seat and walked towards Steve. The rest of the team nodding along, glad that Tony stood up for you because they were frozen themselves.
“Oh yeah Tony, you’re right I’m sure she feels guilty, don’t you y/l/n?” He looked at you as if you were a kid
Everything about him was hurting you right now. His voice tone that humiliated you in every way, his eyes that sent daggers to your way, his body that was intimidatingly towering yours, his smile which always made you happy and now it was only mocking you. Your throat is dry, your eyes are wet and you feel like your heart is going to come out of your chest in any second. You were hurt and unwell, and everyone could see that, everyone but Steve.
“Agent y/I/n do you feel guilty about your past?" He repeated his sarcastic question.
"I wouldn't worry about that too much since you have a good way to cope with your guilt right?" He continued.
You looked up at him frighteningly, understanding where he was going.
“Steve don't you dare." you whispered, finally being able to say something.
Everyone was confused since they had no idea what you both were talking about.
“you seem scared agent." Steve smirked at you sending shivers down your spine. It hurts so much more that he wasn't even using your name anymore, he felt like a stranger to you.
“SHUT UP!" you had never yelled so loud in your life, the whole jet shook. Everyone flinched but Steve. It seemed like he was waiting for this.
“Come on y/n are you that afraid of everyone knowing how you used to deal with your problems, or do you still do it?"
Everyone was quite once again, something in them wanted to know what Steve was talking about but they also didn't because of the way you reacted.
You looked at him not saying anything but your eyes were begging him to stop. You've never been in such a vulnerable position, especially considering everything you’ve been through.
“oh don't tell me you're gonna cut your wrists open again because you feel guilty you didn't get the second driver."
Everyone froze and widened their eyes, silence filling the jet. No one knew that you used to harm yourself until you started dating Steve, he was the first person to ever know. You felt so comfortable around him that you didn't want to have any untold secrets.
You thought about what if you guys break up but you convinced yourself that even if you guys separate your ways from each other at some point, you're definitely going to stay friends and he's never going to tell your secret to anyone because you believed he was a good man. You trusted him more than yourself and now he proved you all wrong.
You didn't cut anymore, because you found a way to save people. If it wasn't for Nick Fury, making you join the team you'd be long gone by now. But you didn't have a reason anymore, you were happy you had a new family and a new job, everything was perfect for you. Now you felt alone all over again and you didn't even blame Steve, you blamed yourself. You failed.
You started trembling more and started to see black spots. The team walked towards you to see if you were okay. Thor pushed Steve away, "Stay away from her," he warned, before walking to you. You heard Tony and Natasha yelling at Steve, Clint trying to calm them down but looking angry himself, Bruce and Thor asking you if you were alright, but you couldn’t hear anything anymore. It was so loud, but you only heard annoying mumbles. You let out a sob before passing out in the strong arms of the god, the last thing you saw being Steve's worried eyes…
A/N: This was my first (published) fan fiction. I apologise for any writing and/or grammar mistakes considering that English isn’t my first language. Feel free to correct me! If you enjoyed this, please let me know and let me know if you want to be tagged in the upcoming posts! (This fic will make a twist;))
#steve x reader#steve rogers x reader#dark steve rogers#dark steve rogers x reader#steve rogers x you#the avengers#avengers x reader#steve rogers x y/n#tony stark#bruce banner#natasha romanoff#thor#clint barton#black widow#steve rogers angst#captain america#mcu#marvel#marvel mcu#red room#dark!steve rogers#dark!steve x reader#steve rogers and reader#angst#steve Rogers x Reader Angst#x reader#reader insert#marvel steve rogers#mcu steve rogers#steve rogers fanfiction
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Why No Love for Red Hood: The Hill?
I think it's all in the marketing and about what's being delivered versus what readers expected.
So I almost made this post on a reblog, but I didn't want to overwhelm that thread. Plus, I'm not sure if people get mad when someone does a long reblog on their short OG post? Anyway, the point of that post was that Issue 3 of 'Red Hood: The Hill' came out and no one's really talking about it, especially Jason/Red Hood fans.
I think the biggest problem (IMO) with this series is that someone wanted to write a story about The Hill and some new characters (which is fine), but like the 'Batman: The Hill' comic (which I think this series is sort of a sequel to), it's banking off a known character, Red Hood, to be it's selling point. "Come for the Red Hood, but stay for these other characters and their story." All fine and good, but a little deceptive when the marketing leans more toward it being a Red Hood (and new 'Outlaw' friends) story rather than one where Jason is a random guest star.
Series description:
In Gotham City’s early days, The Hill was one of Gotham City’s most dangerous neighborhoods, one that required the residents to band together to keep themselves safe when the police – and sometimes even Batman – wouldn’t.
Now, as the Hill finds itself gentrifying, old habits die hard as the vigilante known only as Strike works with her team to keep the town safe—but she’s not alone. Jason Todd, one of the Hill’s newest residents, is more than happy to don the visage of Red Hood to help Strike keep his new home safe. But a new villain is emerging from the shadows. Will Red Hood, Strike and the Hill’s small militia of vigilantes be able to keep their home safe?
And this brings me back to the marketing and advertising of this series, especially versus the Batman: The Hill comic.
Obviously we can see the artistic parallels between these two covers (above). Overall, good job and nice throwback, but... there's a major difference. These two are not similar.
The first cover has "THE HILL" in bold, prominent text and Batman is in the background. This says that Batman is part of the story, but he seems secondary to whatever's going on in the foreground, which is mostly true to the story.
The second cover has "RED HOOD" prominent in the title with "The Hill" as secondary and smaller. Jason is also front and center with Batman looming behind him (who only just showed up at the end of issue 3. There's only two more issues left). The character of Strike, our new protagonist and The Hill's main hero, is down at the bottom and barely in-frame, further suggesting it's more about Jason (and maybe Batman) than The Hill or other characters. Again, clever marketing and nice design nod to the original cover, but deceptive when it comes to the series content. I don't necessarily blame the cover artist here as they might've been given a different brief on what the story was about and I get the fun throwback to the old Hill cover, but these covers are almost reversed in terms of Bat-character prominence.
In the original, Batman was more intertwined in that comic's story than Jason is in his series, which further adds to the audience letdown. If anything, this series needed to go with the coffee shop musician strategy: play a bunch of cover songs to win over the crowd and then slip in your original music (OCs) here and there. Once you have your audience hooked, go all out with your original stuff and then throw in 'Wonderwall' just for kicks and to keep them invested.
Ultimately, I think the biggest problem of this series is pacing and balance. The series needs more Jason to allow readers time to invest in the new characters, but as those new characters develop through their interactions with him THEN Jason can fade back as a partner character or just random character who comes in to help out. As it is, he's a guest star in series called, 'RED HOOD: the hill' with most of Jason's actions being 'day-in-the-life' stuff or a random action panel or two.
If anything, I think Red Hood #51 and #52 did a better job of establishing Jason as a main player, but also working alongside a new hero (Strike) and citizens of The Hill in solving a case. The covers above also display a more balanced composition and preview of what you're getting. Yes, you're reading a Red Hood comic, but there will be some other significant characters playing in this sandbox that you should care about and watch out for.
Sadly, I think the untrue message DC will take away from this series if it doesn't do well is that: (1) Jason is NOT an instant seller so let's shelf him because he couldn't carry this series (that he's barely in), and (2) readers don't like these new characters (most of which are BIPOC and/or LGBTQ), so let's ditch them and do more Batman stuff. 🤦♂️
And that's unfortunate because I think there's potential here had this series been executed in a better way. I see where the writer wanted to go with these new characters and they actually seem like an interesting and cozy bunch, but I feel like I'm stepping into an already established found family/friend group, but I don't really know them and I'm the outsider. So eventually I'll find a random distracted moment to quietly say bye to my friend Jason and slip out before anyone notices... like the socially awkward introvert that I am.
#jason todd#red hood#dc comics#batman#red hood the hill#dg outlaw rants#I want to like this series and I'll probably finish it just to see what happens#but I think there's a lot going on and it needed more time and room to breathe so readers could invest in these new characters#Yet if someone is loving it so far and Strike and the others inspire new fics-art-or-cosplay I'm all for it
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Guilt-Tripped Pt.2
TW: Canon-typical violence
Part 1 part 3
Pairing: Ghostxreader(ish)
Summary: The mission does not go according to plan
Wc: 1758
A/N: The fights scenes are fast-paced/rushed intentionally, I was trying to give off the feel of combat, if it did not work please let me know and I'll fix it :)
You were off your game, that much was clear. Not only was this mission located in your mother country, but the base you were clearing was one you had been “trained” in. You were anxious, and you knew Ghost could tell. But, true to form, he did not pry. That was one of the reasons you liked him. Everyone else would have asked questions but Ghost didn’t. He respected your privacy, understood that not everything is meant to be shared.
“Ghost, how copy?”
“Solid. Moving in.”
“Copy.” You unsling your gun from your shoulder, following Ghost into the abandoned building. You cover his six as you clear the building, finger hovering over the trigger of your gun. The ghosts contained in the walls were dogging your footsteps, begging for you to turn and listen to them.
“Again”
“You’ll break them.”
“Only the weak.”
“No, please!”
“Do it again!”
“Do not defy me.”
“Again.”
“Y/N.” You snap back to attention, “Buildn’s clear.”
“Ay. Let’s look for the intel then.”
“It’ll go fas’er if we split up.”
“Ah…I guess.”
“Stay frosty.” With that Ghost heads up the stairs, leaving you to pray he doesn't find anything he’s not supposed to. You take a deep breath and turn away, searching the rooms more intently this time, on the lookout for files and a USB drive instead of hostiles.
The first room has nothing, just some rotting pieces of wood that used to be furniture. Still, something about it leaves you feeling deeply unsettled. You step out and head to the room across the hall, your hairs standing on end. The second room is basically the same, as are the third and fourth. And fifth. And sixth. After the final room reveals nothing, you head upstairs to help Ghost.
The stairs creak under the weight of you and your gear, the sound adding to the already eerie atmosphere. You grit your teeth, forcing yourself to walk through the hallways that haunt your nightmares.
Ghost is in the first room you come to, his face lit up by a computer that somehow is still working. Alarm bells ring in the back of your brain, but you ignore them, instead focusing on the video that is playing.
“Again.”
The video is grainy, but you know the scene well. 3 girls stand side by side, guns in hand.
“Again.”
They drop to the ground, legs swinging around before standing.
“Again.”
They fire simultaneously, one loud gunshot echoing through the room.
“Again.”
“Again.”
“Again.”
“Again.”
“Aga-
The video cuts out, but you still see what happened next.
“-in.” You are faster this time, the girls next to you running out of stamina. You had been at this for hours, a constant stream of crouch, stand, fire, reload. You drop into a crouch, sweep your legs around, and come up, you and the girl to your left firing at the same time. You don’t even flinch as the girl to your right is dragged away.
“Again.”
Crouch, stand, fire, reload.
“Again”
Crouch, stand, fire, reload.
“Again.”
Crouch, stand, fire, reload.
“Again.”
Crouch, stand, fire, reload. And once again, you are faster. The girl to your left is dragged away, leaving only you. Your palms are blistered and your knees are torn open, but you won.
“Y/n.” You stare at the target in front of you, breathing hard.
“Y/n!” You raise your head, searching for the woman in charge of your training. Except the voice calling for you is male, and…British?
“Y/n!” A hand touches your shoulder and you don’t think, just react. Your gun is buried between the persons ribs before your vision even clears.
“Fuck. Ghost I…fuck. I’m s-fuck.” You stagger back, blinking hard as you holster the weapon. Ghost has his own weapon trained on you, though his finger is not on the trigger.
“What in th’ bloody hell was that?” He hisses. You inhale, exhale, and shove your emotion down where they won’t bother you.
“I am sorry.” You say softly, “I zoned out and you…scared me.” He doesn’t say anything in response, just grunts and shakes his head, holstering his gun. You hold your breath as he stares at you with an indiscernible look in his eyes.
“We'll talk when we get t’ base.” He says finally. You nod, fingers trembling as you follow him into the next room. You hadn’t noticed when you were clearing it before but the rooms up here are much more preserved. This room is empty, save for a barre attached to the wall, the one way mirror above it shattered into a million pieces.
The girls dance in unison, repeating the moves over and over and over again. Your tutu makes your skin itch, and your toes are bleeding from the hours of non-stop practice. Still, you don’t complain. Even at seven years old, you know better than to voice your sorrows.
“Good y/n. Again.” Legs burning, feet aching, skin itching, you begin the routine again. You bring your leg up but your ankle rolls, your form wobbling.
“Oh y/n. I had such high hopes for you.” Your body is thrown across the room, stars dancing across your vision as the acrid smell of smoke fills your senses. Wait…smoke?
“Y/n!” You inhale sharply, looking up at Ghost. But he’s not there. In his place is an aging man with a road face and short beard.
“Dreykov.” He’s older, much older, but you would recognize him anywhere. You look around the room, trying to find any sign of Ghost. The simple movement sends waves of pain through your skull, makes your vision blurry. But you've operated in much worse condition before.
“Where’s Ghost?” Your voice sounds oh so far away.
“Hello to you too darling.” You shiver almost imperceptibly at his voice, “Why don’t you use that pretty little head of yours and tell me?” You can barely hear him over the high-pitched whine bouncing around your skull. Oh, right, your ears are ringing. Ringing, why are your ears ringing? You blink hard, taking in your surroundings. The room is filled with smoke, the remnants of the outer wall scattered across the room, the result of an explosion. Something sticky trickles down your face, dripping into your eyes as you put two-and-two together.
You and Ghost had walked into the room, you’d been violently thrown into a flashback, and while you were off in la-la land, Dreykov must have blown through the wall. But that still didn’t explain where Ghost was. You inhale slowly, trying to focus your vision. And-there! You spot a hole in the floor, and the only thing you can think is that Ghost fell through.
Later you’ll blame it your disoriented state for forgetting he was there, but really you just didn’t want to face Dreykov alone. You leave him in the room, leave him to escape with the intel you'd come to collect, and sprint down to the first level to find Ghost. You jump over fallen bits of ceiling, dodging debris as the building slowly falls apart around you.
Ghost is prone on the ground, a Widow prowling around his body. They always did like to play with their food.
Without thinking you launch into the fray, tackling the Widow over his back. It is a short but intense fight, serving as a distraction as Ghost forces himself up. It ends when she throws a sloppy punch towards your face. You grab her wrists, yanking her forward and sweeping her legs out from underneath her. She hits the ground at the same moment you unload your weapon into her chest.
“You always did think you were better than us.” You spin around as you reload, swaying slightly as your vision blurs again. Another widow, one you failed to notice, stands behind Ghost, a gun pressed at his head.
“I did not.” Your voice is calm and even, not betraying your inner distress as your eyes dart around the room as you try to find a way to get her away from him.
“Yes you did.” The widow snarls. She draws another weapon, slamming the butt of it into Ghost's skull with startling force, leaving him to collapse like a ragdoll.
“We were always second best, always the ones punished, always the ones in trouble. Nothing compared to you.” You begin to circle each other, your eyes trained on the gun she has aimed at you. The motion makes you sick, and you can’t hear anything over your focus on staying awake.
You blink, and suddenly the widow is in front of you. Just as she wraps her finger around the trigger Ghost, who'd be faking his apparent unconsciousness, tackles her. You can see how the scene will play out, and it doesn't end pretty.
You throw yourself at the Widow Just as she plants her gun in Ghosts chest, sending both of you flying across the room. She ends up on top you so you buck your hips, sending her flying forward. You're moving on pure instinct at this point, to dizzy to think.
You wrap you arm around hers and swing your leg over her side, using the momentum to flip positions so that you're on top. You draw your firearm, but are a millisecond too slow.
She flings you off, your skull bouncing of the pavement as you fall to the side. You manage to keep a grip on your weapon but God's does your head hurt.
You blink yourself back into awareness, coming too just in time to watch Ghost grapples with the Widow for he gun. Ghost may be good, but the Widow is great.
You are too dizzy too see straight, but that's no problem. The Institute had made sure you could shoot a target blindfolded, so you close your had around your 9 mil, raise it front of you, and fire.
You are awarded with a female cry of pain, a thud, and silence.
"You...solid?" You wheeze, gun still held tight in your hand.
"Aye. Y'...y' no' lookin' t' gud there." You can barely hear him, swaying slightly where you stand. Gods your head hurts.
You step forward, practically collapsing into Ghost. You can feel his heart beating rapidly, and you think he's talking to you, but you can’t hear him. Though blurry, your eyes are drawn to the Widow laying in a pool of blood, her brown hair pillowing her head.
It makes you sad, almost, to see someone who didn't get saved. Survivors guilt is what your court-therapist had called it. You thinks it was a load of bullshit but it's not like...is she moving?
You flip around Ghost without thinking, unloading your weapon on the Widow just as her bullet pierces your flesh.
tbc
Tell me what you think!!
@greatkittencloud
#cod fanfic#simon ghost riley#cod#ghost fanfiction#ghost x reader#cod x reader#angst#no beta we die like men#call of duty#simon riley x reader#simon riley#simon ghost riley x reader#red room reader#black widow reader#badass reader#closed off reader#captain john price#john price#john soap mactavish#soap
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"Levi?"
"Hm?"
"I think you're cute."
"Shut up." He mumbled as he looked away, a blush spreading all the way his neck.
"What? I just said you're pretty."
"Stop. Don't do that."
#HE WILL BLUSH BLUSH#IM TALKING BORDERLINE RED#AND HE CANNOT LOOK AT YOU IN THE EYES FOR THE REST OF THE DAY#Man will malfunction#levi.exe stopped working.#he will walk out the room lmfao#and pretend you don't exist#aot#levi ackerman#levi#captain levi#levi heichou#snk#levi x reader#aot fanfiction#levi thoughts#levi fluff#captain levi x reader#levi x you
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Redson with a partner who loves to just sit in the workshop and watch him work (or just in general vibe in there maybe doing their own thing. Just, in silence existing in the same room together.) but due to autism (or anything else that could lead to noise sensitivity) can't handle some of the particularly loud machinery or tools (drilling for example) so Redson gets them noise cancelling headphones just so they can continue to keep him company while he works.
#selfship#lmk red son x reader#lmk selfship#redson x reader#lmk redson#lmk redson x reader#red son x reader#red son#red son monkie kid#selfship imagines#i frequently think about being able to just exist in the same room as him while he does his work#but only now have i taken into consideration that#oh wait loud machine noises my autistic ears simply would not handle#so... solution
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Promises | n romanoff
Summary: Natasha and Anastasia didn’t know love… not until they found it in each other. But the Red Room was cold, in more ways than one
Warnings: Red Room, death, blood, shooting
Pairings: young!natasha x young!OC
wc: 2.6k
Notes: this one hurts but I’m proud of it. Another oldie again
- ⧗ -
30 pairs of pointe shoes became 20.
20 filled beds because 10.
10 black leotards became 5.
30 terrified girls became 5 ruthless ones, eyes trained... emotionless killers.
Their dainty arms capable of a swifter death than a gun. Slim fingers able to twirl a knife like someone would spin a pen.
Sleep not filled with dreams of puppies and ponies, but the haunting features of their victims. The screams, the looks of pain and anguish on their faces that each girl took in only moments before each life was ended.
Each life less important than the last.
The air was cold. No signs of love. No comfort. Just stone cold harsh reality that they had grown accustomed to. Freezing their young hearts to not feel pain.
Teaching them to crave the feeling. The satisfaction of a clean kill. A bullet straight through the heart. A silent knife slice to the throat, lodged in the stomach of an unsuspecting victim.
Somehow, the inside of the ice covered building was colder than the outside. The only sounds were barking orders and screams of pain. Each gut wrenching noise not affecting the 5 girls who remained.
Their faces were cold, no expressions as they fought through the day. No words of conversation passed between roommates, no cheers of congratulations as sparring matches were won.
These girls weren't friends. They were competitors. And losing to someone else meant death.
But there was an anomaly within. A flicker of light in the endless pool of darkness. A spark.
Hope.
Natasha Romanoff. The girl most likely to succeed. She was the top girl. Loved by all the trainers, she was the favourite. Her ruthlessness, her seductive ways were well beyond her years. So much strength in a tiny 15 year old body.
Yet she risked throwing it all away. For a girl.
Anastasia Vladimenkova.
The dark haired girl who was an incredibly skilled dancer and knife thrower. Her accuracy was unbeatable, but her sparring was not up to the same standard.
Somehow, the tiny piece of Natasha's heart that still remained took pity on her and trained her secretly at night, so she wouldn't be killed off in the next ceremony.
The girls formed an odd friendship, if you want to call it that. They didn't know love, but somehow found it in each other. And suppressed feeling spiralled quickly, so the friends turned into lovers quickly.
They would sneak out at night for stolen kisses and private moments, hands just roaming each other's bodies, trying to hold on to the last moments they got with each other. No one knew when their last day would be.
But the ceremony was looming over their shoulder, knowing their group of 5 would become 4 by tomorrow evening.
It was 2am and Natasha had taken Anastasia to the shower room, as the barred window let the moonlight shine down onto the cracked tiled floor, lighting their faces slightly.
Their bodies were pushed into the corner, Natasha's back against the cold stone as Anastasia laid her head on her chest. The atmosphere was different, they could both feel it.
"I don't want tomorrow to come." the brunette whispered, breathing in Nat's scent as she spoke.
"I know. I don't either. Especially not if it means I lose you."
Anastasia swivelled round and sat opposite Nat, her hand on her cheek. "You're not gonna lose me. You know they don't put us against each other. We're too valuable to them."
Natasha sighed, the moonlight in the small bathroom window catching her eyes. The moon and stars looked so free, something the redhead craved more than ever. "I don't want to be an object anymore. I want to run away. With you." She turned her head back to Stasia and pulled her closer, their faces inches away from each other.
Green eyes stared into chocolate brown ones, fear dancing across their pupils. They could be as hopeful as a child on christmas, but it wouldn't stop the brutal ceremony from tearing them apart tomorrow. No one could predict the outcome, and it was something Natasha hated.
"I don't want to lose you. I cant lose you." The redhead whispered, her eyes glinting as tears filled up to her waterline.
"You have me right now. And I love you."
That was enough for the teenagers to gently press their lips together, eyes closed in the blissful moment. It wasn't passionate or lust filled like it should have been, because the girls had never been exposed to that. The kiss was light and sweet, their lips moving together but nothing more.
"Natty." Stasia mumbled against her lover's lips. "We can escape. Tomorrow night. All we need to do is get through the ceremony. And then we go." The brunette pulled away and sat back on Nat's thighs, her legs hooked around the redhead's waist. "We can do it. We can make it work."
Nat shook her head. "How Stas? You know the guards; they're everywhere. We're small, but not that small. We can't slip past them without being seen."
"We can Nat. Please, we need to try."
Anastasia’s voice had raised slightly, which wouldn't have been an issue if everyone in their dorm room was asleep. But one blonde girl in the bed closest to the bathroom was laying awake, the sound of muffled voices sparking her curiosity.
Saskia crept out of her bed, her stealth skills coming in handy as she padded across the stone floor. Sticking to the shadows, she tiptoed across the room, hiding by the doorframe as she finally got a look at the girls who were hiding.
The red hair was an instant giveaway, and the girl she was lip locked with on her lap wasn't difficult to make out either. Natasha and Anastasia. The top girls in the class. The Madame's favourite girls.
As they spoke, Nat suddenly shushed Stasia, feeling a presence in the room. Saskia pressed herself closer to the wall, holding her breath. But Anastasia just giggled and pulled Nat's face back to her, joking about her being paranoid, which Nat accepted with a kiss.
Saskia smirked to herself, knowing how she instantly had an advantage the day before the fighting ceremony. She hovered for 10 more minutes, her smile growing wider as Anastasia’s excited voice muttered over their escape plan. It layer out perfectly in the blonde's palm and she scurried back to bed, finally able to sleep peacefully.
- ⧗ -
5 teenagers sat on the head table, tactical suits on their bodies, hair braided and pulled back out of their faces. Porridge filled their bowls, but none of them wanted to eat, the fear filling their empty stomachs, taking the space of any food that would give them energy to fight.
Saskia wandered in late, a smug expression on her stark features. She glanced at Stasia and Natasha, who were sat on the other end of the table, her eyebrow quirking up. Her plan was working.
As the girls lined up at the edge of the sparring mats, Nat reached out and linked her pinky finger with Stasia’s, their little promise ritual they performed before every fight. It was small and subtle, but it gave them a small promise and it had worked in every single fight they had done. Their promise to be there for each other. To not leave, to not betray and to not die.
Madam walked into the sparring area, her hands clasped as tightly behind her back as her hair was pulled up in a bun. She scanned the teenagers in front of her, eyes lingering on the redhead and brunette for a split second longer.
"As you all aware, today is your final sparring ceremony. The girls who survive will go on to become the greatest assassins the world has ever known. The KGB will be grateful for your services."
Anastasia gulped, her heart rate picking up. She always hated sparring; it wasn't where her skill set lay. If this was a knife throwing competition she would win by a mile. Her accuracy was unmatched.
"Natasha Romanoff." Madam's heavily accented voice called out, her eagle eyed gaze locking firmly on the redhead. Nat walked forward, wanting nothing more than to hug Stasia, but knowing it would get her killed.
"And your opponent will be... Anastasia Vladimenkova."
The girls' hearts dropped to their stomachs. No. This couldn't be happening. This wasn't part of the plan. Not at all.
With shaking hands clenched tightly into fists, Anastasia walked onto the mats, her head held high. She couldn't show her emotions right now, as much as she wanted to burst into tears. She was supposed to be made of marble, they both were, and so couldn't show weakness when put against each other. They were nothing more than sparring partners, fighting for their life.
They waited for the signal before starting to circle, fists raised in defence in front of their faces, eyes locked on each other. Natasha wished she had telepathic abilities so she could talk to Stasia, trying to form a plan in her head.
They were pulling their brunches as they fought, not wanting to cause serious injury, but causing the odd bruise here and there so it didn't look too suspicious.
But after 15 minutes, Madam called out for them to stop. She called 2 guards over and they grabbed Nat by the arms, causing the redhead to instinctively lash out, kicking and punching at her attackers.
"Nat!" Anastasia cried, running forwards before she too was dragged back. She didn't care that Madam was watching her. She didn't know where they were gonna take Natasha and terror flooded her body.
But she stopped fighting as Nat was forced into a chair, her face still as stone like and straight as ever. Not a single emotion flashed behind her eyes. Not when her wrists were tired. Not when Madam grabbed her face. Not when Anastasia had a gun forced into her hands, guards aiming their own guns at the back of the brunette's head.
"Love is for children. Are you a child Natasha?" Madam spat, her russian accent thick.
"No Ma'am."
She turned to Anastasia. "Are you a child Anastasia?"
The brunette's hands shook around the gun that was clasped between her fingers, aimed at Natasha who was sat straight on the chair. "No Ma'am."
"Weakness." She growled, her ice cold palm slapping Natasha across the face. "You are to be made of marble. Not wasting your time making faces at things like that!" Her bony finger pointed in Anastasia’s direction, seeing the weaker girl flinch under her gaze. All of Stasia’s training had gone out of the window, pure panic flooding her veins as she saw Natasha sat before her.
"Yes Ma'am." Nat's voice was emotionless, the sparkle Stasia was used to seeing completely distinguished.
"Natasha Romanoff you would have been the top student. I had high expectations for you, and you've thrown it all away. Thank you Saskia, for showing me that you're not truly cut out to take your place in the world."
"I have no place in the world." Natasha mumbled, her eyeline dropping to the floor.
"You're right. You don't." Madam turned back to Anastasia, who had dropped the gun to her side. "Anastasia. Shoot her."
"I- what?" Stasia’s eyes went wide, but there was no hint of a joke in her instructor's eyes.
"You heard my words Vladimenkova. Kill her. You will not have any weaknesses."
Anastasia gulped but raised the gun, eyes locked with Natasha. Sweat trickled down her brow and she gulped, feeling a tear slip down her cheek.
"Nat." She whispered, trying to get a reaction from her.
"It's okay Stas. Do it. I'm with you baby. I'm always with you." Nat pushed down all of her fear. The sight of the gun brought relief, which was twisted. She was 15 years old, a gun should spark fear. Not be a source of comfort to end her pain. In her mind, if she couldn't have Stasia then she didn't want to live. And the Academy wouldn't allow her to have both.
"Nat no. I can't." She dropped the gun.
Big mistake.
The moment the metal clanged against the tiled floor, Natasha knew it was over. The guards' reflexes were fast. Too fast. The girl's pale fingers dropped the weapon and a shot was fired into her skull at the same second.
Nat had wiggled her way out of the rope, so the moment Anastasia’s body dropped to the floor, she leaped out of her chair and raced across the floor, screaming out as blood stained the old tiles. Anastasia’s body was limp as Nat got there, her eyes dull as she stared up at the ceiling.
"No!" The redhead yelled out, startling the giles standing on the opposite side of the room. She looked up at them, scanning and analysing each and every one of them. They were all scared, showing the same expression.
Except one.
Saskia had an guilty essence about her and Nat saw it straight away. She saw red and glared at her, breathing heavily through her nose. The snake. The reason her love was sprawled on the floor, a bullet hole in her skull.
Natasha's fingers curled around Stasia’s, their pinkies locking together like they'd done less than an hour before. Her tears dropped onto the brunette’ chest and she cried out before anger took over again.
Still clutching Stasia, she lifted her head again and locked eyes with Saskia, her bottom lip trembling. "YOU!"
But her rage was never taken out as 2 guards surged forwards, grabbing her arms and pulling her away. Nat's stone cold facade had dropped away and she screamed out for Anastasia, her gaze fixed on her best friend, her lover, the light in her dark life, her body laying abandoned on the floor like she was garbage.
"Stasia!! Stas no!" She kicked and screamed, fighting with all her might to get away from the guards. But her tiny 15 year old, malnourished body was no match for the 6 foot guards built of pure muscle. Not in her hysterical state. Assassin Natasha could take these guys out with 2 moves, but her body and mind weren't working as one.
She screamed and cried the whole way down the corridors, not even taking in her surroundings. She didn't know where she was until she was thrown into a cell, hearing the barred doors clang shut. But she didn't move. Her body landed in a heap on the stone floor and she stayed and wept, clawing at her chest and arms in pain as she wailed. She passed out hours later, her hands clasped together...
Her pinkies linked together.
Like the ghost of Anastasia was with her, watching over her and looking out for her, like they had always promised.
#fanfic#marvel#natasha romanoff#natasha romanoff x reader#red room#natalia romanova#black widow#oc#natasha romanoff oneshot#natasha romanoff angst#wlw
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I read your blackwidow!reader headcanons and was wondering if you could do headcanons on the bat family finding out about/reacting to what happened the them in the redroom?
Thank you for requesting.
This is a continuation of this post here :)
⛤ BATFAM MASTERLIST ⛤
⛤ You never wanted to tell them what happened when you were in the Red Room. You tried to block all memory of it from your mind so you could move on with your life, but an experience like that is not something that is easily forgotten.
⛤ Being in the Red Room meant that you were constantly watching and waiting for something to happen, and that made you jumpy if they somehow managed to catch you off guard.
⛤ Although you never spoke openly about your experience for the first few months you were with them, they knew you had been put through hell, so when they found out the extent of what really happened, they were shocked.
⛤ After learning about your brutal training, inhumane treatment and brutal killings they were shaken but they wouldn't discriminate against you for it, because they knew it was out of your control. And besides, Cass and Damian had been put through a similar thing, hell even Tim had when he was brainwashed by the Joker.
⛤It would be safe to say that Jason would be angry, and try would want to seek some sort of vengeance for his sister, but would reluctantly back down. Damian would also be angry, though to a lesser extent. Tim and Dick would try to comfort you, reassuring you that none of what happened was your fault.
⛤ They wouldn't treat you much different after finding out however. To them, you were still their sister, no matter what you had been through. But they made sure that you knew that you could go to them no matter what and that they would always help you.
#batfam x reader#writing#batfam headcanons#batfam x sister reader#DC x reader#red room#Black Widdow#Dick Grayson#Dick Grayson x reader#Dick Grayson x sister reader#Nightwing#Nightwing x reader#Jason Todd#jason todd x sister reader#red hood#red hood x reader#Tim Drake#tim drake x reader#tim drake x sister reader#Red Robin#Red robin x reader#Damian Wayne#Damian wayne x reader#damian wayne x sister reader#Robin#Robin x reader#marvel x reader#marvel x dc#marvel x dc headcannons#marvel x dc crossover
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Hi! I remember reading a yandere!husband x reader fic on your blog abt a yan!husband who secretly tortures people in his basement as he livestreams on the dark web and one day, the reader finds out so he locks her up in there and makes her watch. I think there was also a pt 2 where reader tries to escape so the husband forces her to wear a mask and SAs her on his live to “hurt her mentally but not physically”. I’ve tried to find those fics again for ages but have had NO luck. Idk if it was a fever dream atp. Please let me know if you did write it. Also, can I be 🦋 anon?
I know the EXACT fic you're talking about but I literally can't find it 😭😭 I didn't write that one but honestly it def inspired me with the kinda 'red room' yandere idea (something I hope to write someday💀) maybe if you go down the 'dark web yandere' search on tumblr you'll be able to find it? Sorry I can't be more help anon! if anyone ends up finding it plz write the author in the comments or something so it will not be lost forever <333
#sucks because I remember reading that one so vividly#it was such a while ago though I feel your pain anon#love red room yandere but for the love of everything holy I have no idea how to write it without reader being brutally tortured#or watching someone being tortured#kn1ves rants#knives rants#writing#yandere#dark web yandere#red room yandere
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