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phantomram-b00 · 6 months

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To Hell with you

So, I was listening to songs. And then an epiphany hit me hit me harder than this fixation of the show; what if…the roles were reversed? Like what if Azirapahle first said no to the promotion yet Crowley said yes instead? I think I saw a fanfic that did this (I don’t remember) but I wanted to take a crack at this, and I feel like I want to cry myself so imma do a fanfic of it, hope you enjoy. And if you still haven’t seen good omens season too, this will contain that so uh spoiler warning ahead. Have fun!

Aziraphale was just done talking with Nina and Maggie just a while ago whilst Crowley walk away; while profusely apologizing for the whole ordeal both for last night and overall, they did give him advice on his love life. Something he never thought he could describe it given their status from their opposing side, but he’ve been in love with Crowley since 1941, so the label wasn’t exactly far off. But nothing official, and thanks to their advice, he though maybe they can? Why not? To hell with both parties that been trying to separate them for millennia now they’re on their own side.

“Right! Let me at least tidy this up before he comes” he spoke to himself while he put some books in their respective spots as well covered the symbol on the floor and make sure nothing was out of the ordinary. Oh ironic given their day to day life on earth. As he does so, he start preparing for the talk as he turn the sign on the front to “very closed”

“Okay, so Crowley!” He chuckled as he talks to himself yet again. “There something I must tell you about, I think it been long overdue for the past 6000 years at this point. And I know I’ve told you you go to fast but-“

He shook his head throwing away that thought like a piece of crumbled paper. That won’t do at all.

“Crowley! Wily serpent! I believe there are thing to be discussed about if that all the same to you…” he said as he put the Jane Austen book in order since Gabriel- err Jim decided to put them away separate by the first sentence they start it. Oh how problematic that organization was it nearly discorperated him the second time. “So we’ve known each other for quite a long time, at this point in time we can even guess each other sentences or predict other moves like Agnes Nutter.” He laughs. “W-well, what I’ve been meaning to say is, w-well, remember when I told you you go to fast? Well, I think I want to retract that statement since I think we can go fast, faster than a rollercoaster as Buddy Holly said-“

He again shook his head, and threw that idea away. But he blushes just thinking about Crowley, how he does want them to make it happen finally, been waiting since 1941 or maybe even longer; his mind begin to wonder around, become a habit for him at this point. He began to think about their life, all the time they’ve been together. Always a risk to be together but deep down, Aziraphale would take that risk all day to see Crowley, the one person that didn’t treat him like an annoyance or dare judge him but instead treated him like an equal, the one person that he would rather dine at the ritz and go on many restaurants with, the one person that he would maybe one day want to live with for all eternity. That feel more like heaven in his eyes than the actual place. In retrospect, he wished if it wasn’t for their side that maybe they could been more braver. Or at least he could’ve been. But he had a smile, maybe they can be now? And they can make up for lost time? And maybe one day, they can move into a cottage? Oh he can never be bored of living with him for all eternity. It make him more giddy just thinking about that possibility.

“Crowley!” He started again. “We need to talk, but I think maybe, this would be best suited if we go to St. James park? You’ve always love that place with the ducks. We can get frozen peas. And we can talk as we sit? Or if you prefer, we can dine at the ritz? I can feel an reservation was just open for two” he giggles while hugging the first edition Jane Erye by Charlotte Brontë. “Or maybe, we can talk here, and have drinks? I’ve got an expensive—“

Ding

Aziraphale look at the door and see Crowley back, couldn’t content his smile even if he tries.

“Crowley!” He said putting the book down and walking over to him.

“Angel” said giving him a smile back in return. He take off his glasses to reveal his Sunny eyes. “Listen angel, there something I need to talk to you about.”

“So do I!” He chuckled lovingly whilst look at his sun. “funny how two minds think alike, but I think first I would like to ask you if-“

“Hold that thought for just a moment angel,” Crowley said as aziraphale stopped his laughter. “Listen, Shax and I talked.”

“I’m quite aware, seen you guys had much to talk about despite what the stunt she pulled.” Aziraphale spoke. “Nearly started a war.”

“Right yeah, uh, so, during the talk, she granted me something. And, well, okay cutting to the chase here angel, she want me to be Duke of hell.”

“Oh.” He said taken aback. “Surely you said no didn’t you? I mean you always complained about how they’re the worst and not to mention that they even have a sign on not licking walls? Frankly you saying…”

He stop to look at Crowley face, reading it carefully like it was one of his books. Only this time he does not appreciate this sudden twist.

“Crowley please tell me…” he choked out. “Please..”

“Angel, maybe I can make this right. If I’m Duke of hell-“

“Oh Crowley” he look away running his finger through his white hair. He then lightly laugh. “Please tell me this is one of your devilish jokes you wily serpent!”

“Shax said…she said I can even bring you down to hell with me. We can make hell nicer, no, we can make hell a better. We can even maybe prevent whatever is happening—“

“Ohhhhhh! Crowley I thought you were better than this.” Aziraphale said choking back the tears. “You should be better than that Crowley!”

“Angel—“

“If I didn’t need heaven then it fairly certain that I don’t need hell neither!” He paced around trying to calm himself but avoiding his eyes. “You know Heaven told me to come back to them with a promotion to be supreme angel before this whole Gabriel and I said “no I will certainly not go back to you” and you shouldn’t neither.”

“Well of course you said no angel, heaven are a bunch of self-righteous arseholes and certainly no better than hell I’ll tell you that much.” Aziraphale face continues to be horrified. “But hell, I know hell isn’t the best neither but angel, if you’re by my side, we can make it better.”

“Crowley are you realizing that if hell ends life here on earth it be just as dead as if heaven ended it.” Azirapahle said this time he open the flood gates and tears are streaming down with his voice cracking. “Crowley… tell me you said no.”

Crowley tries his best to choke back his tears too. Seeing his angel distraught was the last thing to see. The last thing he ever wanted to do. He look away from aziraphale feeling his heart growing heavier the more this conversation prolongs.

“Crowley…?” Aziraphale said not even trying to wipe his golden tears away.

“Angel. Maybe I can make an actual difference. I can try to stop it.”

Aziraphale shook his head, he was too shocked yet to upset to form any form of a sentence. His glossy eyes was enough for Crowley to start his water works, he look away once more. Aziraphale turn around and let out a sigh.

“Right guess you got everything out then, it my turn to say my piece—“ despite this, Crowley waited patiently. “We’ve known one another for quite a long time. We’ve been on this planet more than the human that roam on earth. We can always rely on one another and we can or at least I had hoped we trusted each other. We’re on our own side as you said even four years ago at the ritz. To hear those words was more heavenly than what heaven could’ve ever offered to me.” He feel his heart growing heavier. “And I would love it if we—“ he stop again as he feel his tear roll down his cheeks once more. “Crowley, how is it that Beelzebub and Gabriel can go off to Alpha Centauri, the place you yourself have been dying to run off, then we could too right? Just the two of us.” Crowley wanted to smile, but he was too distraught himself to bring himself to do so. “You’ve always said, that we don’t need heaven or hell, they’re toxic Crowley! We can still run like you always said, we can even go to Alpha Centauri with them” Crowley shook his head repeatedly. “We can— what why are you saying what is it?” He said showing curiosity and concern.

“Angel then come with me. I can run it and you can be right by my side. We can make a different please.” Crowley said pleading now. He want to cup his hand on his face wiping away those golden tears, but even when he toke a step, aziraphale toke a step back shaking his head.

“You can’t leave—“ me. “You can’t leave this bookshop.”

Crowley would never want to leave him alone. He would do anything to stop time just to stay in this bookshop for all eternity with him, basking in their love they been so desperately trying to achieve. To listen to angel’s ramble of a book he know he read for the millionth time. To have quality time with him whether it just them drinking wine or even just them holding each other in their embrace while they listen to classical music to bebop as azirapahle would call his taste. But that not what he said did he?

“Oh Aziraphale..” Crowley said giving a sadden smile. “Nothing last forever.” He wanted to kick himself just for saying those fatal words. The words that finally push azirapahle over the edge as now he can’t hold back. He hold his hand in his face as he let it out, just for a moment. Even in that moment, Crowley want to hug him. But he stopped after a moment, as to try to revert back to his calm demeanor.

“No.” He said grabbing his glasses and giving it back to Crowley. “I suppose you’re right about that one.” Crowley look as he see the glasses. Trying to process what he was even doing. “I wish you the best of luck in your endeavors.”

He proceed to walk out of his own bookshop.

“Best of luck..” then it hits him. “Angel!” He doesn’t stop walking away. “Aziraphale come back!” Aziraphale turn around, he was completely drained. His angelic happiness is no where to be found in his hazel blue eyes. “Work with me.” He still pleads, even aziraphale let out a sigh as he continues. “To hell..we can be on our side even down there. Doing our own things down there.” Aziraphale wince from that sentence as he look away to avoid his eyes. “I-I need you aziraphale!” He finally said which prompted him to finally look at him. Both their watery eyes met. It felt like time stopped again. Maybe Crowley finally convinced him. Maybe they can be in their side even in hell. Maybe they could make things better. Him and Aziraphale against them—“you have to understand what I’m trying to offer here Angel..”

“Oh I think I know quiet well. Maybe even more than you can Crowley.” He said. But he realize it wasn’t his usual tone. He sounded apathetic. Is this really it? This shouldn’t be. Why does it feel…

“Well. If that the case, is there really anything else to say at this point?” Crowley said as he put on his glasses as his tears starts to appear yet again.

“Listen.” Aziraphale said pointing up. “Can you hear anything?”

“No. Angel what are you trying to…”

“That’s exactly my point. No nightingale.” He said, that was it for him. He feel he can’t hold it back any longer. “You stupid snake. We could have been us.” Aziraphale said emphasizing on the term us. Crowley looked away to let tears run, even closing his eyes to hope it be all over. But then he felt his lapel of his blazer being pull and the feeling of soft lips pressed again his own. His eyes shock open as he see aziraphale. Principality. Angel of the eastern gate. Kiss him. This wasn’t what he expected their first to be, not one where tears are mixing with each others. He wanted it to be more romantic, more on a happier note. One that both can enjoy. Not this. Not when his angel is obviously hurt. Oh Satan, what have he done. He lift his hands couple times but he was able to place his hand behind Aziraphale’s back and kiss back. He felt his head spin around like all the planets he created, can feel like he seeing stars he help create. And here he is, kissing the biggest star he’ve every laid his eyes on.

Soon they pull away from each other, Crowley having to catch his breath, not hiding his cries anymore. Aziraphale just stand there in hope, can this finally convince him? Crowley look at Azirapahle, many emotion can be battling each other, anger, lament, happiness, shocked? Maybe all above.

“I…I…” love you. Do it again. “TO HELL WITH YOU” he wanted to cover his mouth. Why did he let them escape. Where the soap when you need it. Aziraphale let out a silent gasp as golden tears escape him once more.

“I forgive you.” Aziraphale said walking out of the bookshop.

“Wait angel!”

He walks out of the bookshop, he almost push people down, forget for a moment that London can get busy. He look around to try to find him. “Aziraphale! Please, come back!”

No avail. He can’t find him anywhere, no white haired tartan wearing angel. He feel down to his knees.

“What have I done?” He said to himself. His scales emerged feeling intense emotions, he wanted to scream as he feel smoke coming out of him.

“Crowley?” He look up and see Shax. “Right, I take it he didn’t take it well.”

“What do you think?” Shax was gonna talk again before he stop her. He stands up “Right don’t answer that. Let just go.” He said drained. Feeling empty. Betrayed.

“Jolly good. Now I will say, I’ve heard word from upstairs.” Shax said as they walk, Crowley look at her but not in interest but he had to know.

“And what do the holier than thou angel say?”

“Well. Something about ahhh. The second coming as they like to call it. We got a role in this too, so best get a move on” Shax chuckled as she walked as she talked more about this role. Crowley stopped. He turn around just for a moment and see Aziraphale, he was far away about to turn the corner. But he can easily see that he left enough room for him to come with him to walk, the finale plead. He can’t make out what his expression was but it didn’t matter, he look at him one last time. Before he start walking backward and turning back to Shax. Completely disappearing from the crowd. “You know. Pity your boyfriend didn’t come. Me and Furfur were betting on it, guess no matter. We got work to do.” He stopped listen as she went on. He wanted more than anything to just run back to him. He wished he didn’t take this. But part of him felt that maybe he can still try. If not fro earth, for aziraphale. To keep him safe as he try to stop this plan. To stop armageddon from happening once more. Even if that meant he can’t see Aziraphale ever again.

Meanwhile Aziraphale just nodded. Understand this was it. It truly was over. He saw Maggie and Nina walk away holding hands as if God was rubbing salt in his wound. He then see Muriel waving at him in glee. He would’ve wave back in mutual respect but not now. Not today. He just walked away leaving them feeling concern. Aziraphale walked, unsure where exactly he walking to but his feet keep moving so he might as well walk wherever his shattered heart take him. He then heard a radio from one of the stores singing the song. That song meant for them.

Snap

Just like that the song stopped. He continues to walk. Walk as far as he can. As golden tears fall once more.

(Reference for the golden tears and Sunny eyes)

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yttsimp · 1 year

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heya would you be willing to do a ranger x gn reader dating hcs? its alright if not!

I'm not dead!!

Rio Ranger General Relationship Hcs

Flavor: Rio Ranger x gn!reader

Warnings: Ranger's a bit of a dick ngl

Headcanons under the cut v

Imma just say right off the bat, you've got your work cut out for you dating this asshole.

He is constantly testing your patience, teasing you and pulling pranks on you just to see your reaction.

He thrives on annoying the hell out of you. After all, he knows you're the only one who can put up with him.

At first, Ranger is gonna be very cold with you.

It frustrates him how he can't figure you out. Why do you want to be with him? He's insufferable and he knows it. So why are you getting so close with him?

He'll reject your advances and do things to piss you off, seeing how far he can go before you snap.

Eventually, you do.

After a particularly nasty insult from him, you finally break and tears start falling from your eyes.

And for some reason, he doesn't feel the accomplishment he thought he would.

Instead, he feels strangely...guilty?

He stares at you blankly for a moment as you break down, trying to process what he's feeling before he realizes.

Maybe he doesn't want to hurt you as much as he thinks he does.

Maybe he actually enjoys your company?

Finally accepting it, he sighs before kneeling down in front of you. Words get caught in his throat for a moment before he finally manages to speak.

"I...I'm sorry. I didn't think..."

Once again, words get caught in his throat. God, why did this have to be so damn difficult?

So instead of using his words, he simply opts to wrap his arms around you for the first time, pulling you close to him in a silent apology as you sob into his chest.

After that, he gets a lot sweeter on you. He still enjoys teasing and pranking you, don't get me wrong, but it's toned down quite a bit.

He doesn't want to make you cry like that ever again.

He's very awkward with physical affection. It's not that it flusters him; it confuses him more than anything.

He's unsure of what to do when you suddenly lace your fingers with his or hug him from behind as a greeting.

He acts as if nothing's wrong, but any time you show him affection he bluescreens in confusion.

Be patient with him, he's never been shown this kind of affection before so he's gonna be very confused.

Over time, he'll get used to it and finally put two and two together on how to react.

He'll start returning your hugs and squeezing your hand back, but not without a teasing remark being thrown in there.

His love language is quality time. He enjoys your time together, and tries to make it as fun as possible for the both of you.

Even if that means you're at the receiving end of his teasing and joking insults.

Yeah, he's gonna be a bit of a bully no matter what.

He has a hard time expressing his love, but he does occasionally manage to tell you. It's hardly ever through words, boy has such a hard time with them. Instead, he prefers to show his affection through gifts and physical touch.

Listen to me. I am speaking directly in your ear. His weakness? Call him pretty boy. Call him pretty boy and you'll send him straight to Jesus.

It's the only time you'll manage to fluster him. And no, he never gets used to it, so feel free to use it as your personal weapon.

When he's flustered, he finally shuts up for once and simply stares at you, heat rushing to his face. He gets stiff and nervous.

He'll remain like that for about a minute before he's brought back to earth and he throws some petty insult as a defense mechanism.

Another way to make him nervous (though not exactly flustered) is through kisses.

At first, he thought kissing was gross. Putting your lips against someone else's lips? Ew. To him, it was like asking for germs.

But once you kissed him for the first time, that all changed.

Kissing quickly becomes his favorite form of affection.

He'll never tell you that though, he would rather die than tell you. Instead, he'll opt to side eye you every few seconds, hoping you get the message and kiss him.

His second love language is gift giving. He'll never get too ambitious with his gifts, but he likes to give you little knick knacks and things he finds to show his affection.

As I've said before, he has a hard time with words, but gift giving is his way of circumventing that.

It takes him a long time, but eventually, something along these lines happens:

You two are on a date somewhere, probably at a park or a cafe. As usual, he's messing with you and throwing teasing remarks your way.

As the night grows, you'll find yourself heading home for the night.

As you approach the door and get your key out to unlock it, he stops you.

"Y/n, hey, wait a sec."

As you turn around to look at him, he shuffles nervously.

"Look, I don't know why, but...you've always been really kind to me. And I...appreciate that."

"I love you."

That's all he says as he looks away from your shocked gaze.

"W-Why are you looking at me like that, dumbass?? I'm just saying how I feel!"

Kiss this asshole and he'll shut up for once.

At first, he's a complete dick who seems to only want to cause you pain. But as your relationship continues, he comes to learn that maybe you aren't so bad. And maybe he loves you way more than he thought at first.

He just hopes he can find it in him to tell you more often.

#your turn to die x reader #yttd x reader #yttd rio ranger x reader #rio ranger x reader

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nyarlathotep-thecrawlingchaos · 5 months

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Honestly I red the WIP you reposted. And I wanna ask all those questions but imma settle for a wild card question instead.

What is your favorite smutty scene you wrote 😁😁😁😁

Wildcard answer for a wildcard question!! Not OPLA. Not really necessary to know what fandom it's for, just that the characters in question were separated for seven years because of a freak time travel accident, this is their first time seeing each other since the night they got engaged.

Not edited, so sorry in advance about any possible typos I didn't notice.

And their eyes met, so fully and suddenly that she couldn't breathe.

##########

He scoffed. "Feel free to go say hi." She pulled back from him sharply, opening her eyes to look at him in alarm. "He's...chained up, down..."

"Down in the dun..."

He seemed to be having no easier a time than her, speech failing him before he could finish. She had been right, he had definitely changed, his torso marred by an abundance of new scars; broader at his chest and shoulders, his once lean muscles expanded and far more pronounced, his lavender hair hanging down well past his powerful chest.

But it was still him. Still his devilishly handsome face going red around the cheeks as he looked at her with the same shock that froze her in place; still his full, enticing lips, parted, fighting to finish his forgotten sentence--still his deep crimson eyes, widened in astonishment as they came to rest on hers.

She wasn't sure which of them moved first, whether they had thawed from their mutual shock in the same instant, but their lips were together again, his hand tugging at her waist to turn her even as she was already scrambling to throw her arms around his neck. She wrapped her thighs around him, pressing herself against his bare chest, moaning as he pulled her forward by her hips, moving his hands quickly between them to tug impatiently at her leather corset again, at the straps over her shoulders, the lace across her chest, the hooks and fastens holding it shut over her stomach.

"How the fuck--" His irritated growl as he tore his lips away brought a breathless laugh from her. "Shut it, shrimp--" he grunted, pulling the laces loose and grasping at it to force several of the hooks open at once. "Fucking corsets--"

"They were very fashionable in the sixth century," she giggled, curling a hand over her mouth.

"I'm buying you new clothes," he snapped over her laughter as he finally got it open and shoved it down her shoulders. "Little shit--" He pressed his lips to hers briefly to muffle her, biting down lightly on her bottom lip as he drew back. "You're gonna get it now."

"Is that a promise?" she asked breathlessly, grinning. She leaned back as he pulled her much looser blouse over her head and tossed it aside.

"Oh, you're so gonna fucking get it," he growled through his teeth, pushing her breasts up. He pulled a sharp cry from her as he wrapped his lips hungrily around one of her stiffening nipples, sucking it hard into his mouth and dragging his tongue across it, brushing his thumb across the other, sending such a sudden, intense shock of pleasure through her that she couldn't do anything to stifle the shameless moan that tore its way out of her chest. She laid her head back, leaning back as she wrapped her thighs around him, and he shoved his hand against the small of her back to pull her right back to him, to feel the hard, growing bulge pressing against her through his loose white pants.

He released her from the agonizing pleasure of his skillful mouth, briefly tilting his head to brush his lips across her other nipple as he pulled the ties at the front of her skirt loose.

"I'm--" She plunged her hands into his hair when he finally looked up at her and crushed her lips to his, muffling another moan in the brief, passionate kiss. He groaned sharply as he pulled his lips away, staring straight into her eyes as he shoved her skirt and her panties down her hips. "I'm gonna make you come so many fucking times," he went on in a low murmur, his suggestion alone swelling a moan in her chest.

She pulled herself back long enough to kick the flowy fabric away and tug her panties down to her ankle, and he pulled her back to him immediately with only one hand at her hip, pulling her to grind down against that hard bulge, pressing his lips to hers to dampen both of their breathless moans. He pushed a hand into her hair, holding her in place, giving her nowhere to look but into his lustful gaze, his devilish smirk sending her heart into a marathon. "Make you come until you pass out," he breathed, shoving his pants down his own hips and shifting to kick them away. She tilted her head in to kiss him again, but he tightened his grip on her hair to stop her, chuckling at her desperate moan. "And wake you back up for more," he went on, pulling her sharply against him by her ass, digging his fingers into the soft flesh and groaning as he rolled his hips up to grind against her overestimated vulva.

"Oh god--" she gasped, her eyes slipping shut as a flood of euphoria melted her against him. She believed it, every indecent claim, every last word leaving his lips, because if he kept teasing her she was going to come the second he was inside her--and gods, did she want him inside her.

But he wasn't done yet. He abruptly lowered his head and pulled one of her nipples into his mouth again, and she could feel the pressure building within her as he guided her to grind down on his throbbing shaft, over and over, answering her unrestrained moans, threatening to make it burst before he even entered her.

"Please--" she moaned, her hands slipping down to his shoulders, gripping at them, digging her short nails into the hard muscle. "I need you--need you inside me, please--!"

He released her nipple in a low moan, pressing his lips into the crook of her neck. "God, I fucking love it when you beg for it," he gasped, moving his other hand to her waist. He brushed his lips to her jaw as she laid her head back, her hips rolling automatically in her mounting pleasure. "Tell me how bad you want it." She bit her lip, whining as he raised his hand again, pulling her head back down, pulling her eyes back to his, murmuring against her lips, "Tell me how bad you wanna feel me throbbing inside you--"

His low moan answered her much sharper one as she pressed her lips to his, pressing her thighs around him, pressing herself against him, needing to feel him with every last inch of her body.

"I don't--" She whined in protest as he moved his hands to her hips, holding her still. "I don't want it, I need it," she moaned, reveling in the flicker in his confident smirk. He wasn't nearly as in control as he would have had her believe. She drew in a slow, deep breath, posing herself to take advantage of this enticing knowledge, to tear away the reigns and take what she wanted, what she desperately needed. She hooked an arm around his neck, laying her forehead against his, gazing hopefully into his eyes.

"Please," she said softly, brushing his fingertips down his cheek. It was more than just a flicker this time--brushing her lips to his, brushing that self-assured smirk right off of them as he breathed a slow, shaking sigh that dissolved into a quiet groan as she grinned slowly down the full length of his arousal. "Make love to me."

She had him, from the desperate desire burning to life in his eyes to the sharp breath he sucked in through his gritted teeth.

"Fuck--" He crushed his lips against hers, pulling her up sharply by her hips, reaching between them only long enough to position himself and tug her right back down--

And her orgasm lashed through her entire body like the crack of a whip as he finally, finally entered her. Her thighs tensed so they quivered around him, her hands trembling as they slipped down his neck, down his chest, her breath filling her lungs in a sharp gasp that left her as an even sharper cry of abandon, that agonizing pressure finally bursting into pure pleasure the likes of which she hadn't known for nearly a decade.

"Ahh--oh, goddamit--" His broken, breathless moan answered her as she tightened around him like a vice. He pushed his hand into her hair to guide her lips back down to his for a slow, deep kiss; guided the rolling of her hips with his other, moving deep within her as she slowly rode out that impossible pleasure, like the crashing waves of a high tide ebbing away toward a the warm, gentle current of morning.

As the tension of the agonizing ecstasy lifted she was left weak, half limp, nothing holding her up but his hands as they came to rest at her waist. She lifted a hand to his hair, combing her fingers back through it, struggling even to keep her lips from slipping away from his. He turned her then and laid her back on the bed so her hands fell to the soft down pillows, holding himself over her with an elbow and slipping his fingers through hers, tracing his lips down her neck and across her shoulder. He curled his arm beneath her arching back, still moving in her so slowly, tensing and gripping hard at her hand as he fought to keep himself under control, draw it out as long as he could stand to. She wouldn't complain if they went on until morning, until she left from the balcony at first light.

But she couldn't bear to think of that right now. Leaving him willfully would be the hardest thing she ever had to do.

She lowered her hand to slip it into his soft hair, turning her head and brushing her lips to his strong jaw. "I missed you so much," she breathed, resting her forehead at his temple and curling her arm around his neck. He lifted himself enough to press his lips to hers, drawing in a slow, deep breath amid the brief kiss. He rested his forehead with hers as his lips slipped only far enough away for him to speak in a quiet murmur, the adoration in his eyes setting her heart to flutter and filling her stomach with butterflies.

"I love you." She moaned softly as his brushed his lips to hers, wondering if he was determined to make her faint already. "I'm never letting you out of my sight again."

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jjhyn · 1 year

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life is still going on

pairing: na jaemin x reader

genre: heavy angst

plot: jaemin is trying to find a way to overcome your death, when clearing out your shared apartment to move back home with his parents, he finds a box of letters you wrote for your untimely death dedicated to him and making sure that he doesn’t give up because life is still goin on.

warning: major character death, reader passed away, major signs of grieving

notes: first time writing something pretty sad, please let me know your thoughts! the series of text that is all italicized and bold are just short excerpts of each letter

includes: mark as reader’s brother and mentions of jeno

words: 1486

a rainy day, suited for the setting that jaemin was in. standing in a powder room, hands gripping the sink as he stares at himself in the mirror. jaemin’s head was running wild, so many thoughts, so many worries, and such little effort to get it together. he’s brought out of his thoughts when there’s a knock on the door, “hey jaem.. they’re looking for you. the ceremony is about to start.” mark says through the door. jaemin shakes his head, trying to clear his brain before having to face the group of people mourning your death, knowing that he had to put on a strong and brave stature, not for them, but for you.

mark is about to knock on the door again when the door suddenly opens, unveiling a jaemin, a jaemin he hasn’t seen before. pale skin, red eyes, stuffy nose, and slumped shoulders. they look at one another momentarily before mark pulls the younger into an embrace. an embrace that jaemin doesn’t know he needed as when he comes into contact with mark, he breaks down. tears start to puddle on marks shoulder and jaemin begins mumbling a string of words, none of which mark can decipher but he knows its jaemin crying out for help. mark tells jaemin to go home, letting him know he’ll take care of the ceremony.

3 months later

jaemin had spent the last 3 months locked in your shared apartment. after leaving your funeral before it even began because he couldn’t handle the pressure of accepting your absence from his life, he hasn’t spoken to anyone except mark and jeno who would occasionally stop by to check in on him but are only met with a conversation through a closed door. he hasn’t eaten normally, he hasn’t felt the warm embrace of the sun, and he hasn’t felt the same since your death. it isn’t until he receives a phone call from his mom that he finally does something other than lay in bed in complete darkness. his parents offer to help him move back home but he refuses to let anyone in, afraid that if anyone were to come in, the memories and your presence there would disappear.

5 months later

he’s begun to clean out your shared apartment, but only mark was allowed to come in. mark has been someone he could rely on, an actual shoulder to cry on, and a pillar of support for him. “hey, imma head out and take this box of trash out with me. anything else you want me to take while i head out?” mark asks as he bends over to pick up a box of stuff jaemin carefully looked through, making sure he didn’t throw away anything that you cherished for he would feel eternally guilty. “no, you’re good…” jaemin responds. as mark is heading out the door jaemin says, “thank you, hyung. i know this is just as hard for you. so thank you for being strong for the both of us.” mark halts and looks at jaemin, “there’s no need to thank me jaem. you’re family to me, y/n loved you so i love you. you’re like a brother to me… but like not an actual brother because that would be weird because my sister dated you.” mark says, making the two of them chuckle at his silly comment. when mark leaves it was that moment that jaemin realizes that was the first time he’s laughed since you’ve been gone.

6 months later

your whole apartment has now been cleared out except for your shared bedroom. a room that jaemin is too afraid to clean because it would mean accepting that you were gone.

9 months later

“jaemin, i just got off the phone with your landlord. he’s terminating your lease early so you don’t have to pay for the full year, but that does mean you’re going to have to clear out the rest of your apartment soon. call me when you can, love you.” *beep* his mom’s voicemail ends.

jaemin sighs as he falls onto his bed, face into the comforter as he takes this moment to think. he shifts his head to the side, his view now the closet and something catches his eye. under a stack of blankets and bedsheets he sees a white string with gold hardware. he gets up and makes his way to your closet and pulls on the string, to which a drawstring bag shaped like a strawberry reveals itself. jaemin doesn’t even revolt at the idea of a strawberry because his curiosity is piqued. his phone begins to ring, not even checking who is calling he answers and says, “i’ll call you right back, i’m busy.” and drops his phone back on the bed.

he sits inside of your closet and begins to open the bag, dumping out it’s contents to find a bunch of handwritten letters, all of which are adorned with the letter “J” and a red heart sticker next to them. he’s never seen these before, when he flips the letters over he sees they have numbers on them, to which he assumes that’s the order they should be read. he opens the first envelope and pulls out the letter, he unfolds the paper and reads the first line, “Dear Jaemin, my love. I know it may be corny but if you’re reading this then that means I fought my battle against cancer and wasn’t strong enough to win…” After reading the first line his eyes start to pool with tears and his chest starts to feel tight and heavy.

thank you for taking care of me. your endless love is what helped me stay strong, i’m sorry i couldn’t be strong enough to grow old with you and love you eternally.

i hope you know that there wasn’t a moment during my chemo process that i wasn’t thinking about you. you are the reason i lived for so long, the reason why i never gave up, and the reason why i know how it feels to be loved.

your love truly meant so much to me. YOU meant so much to me, more than you could ever know. the way you made me feel loved outweighs any sickness and pain i felt, and i hope this pain never made it’s way to your heart that is so filled with love, joy, and everything i loved about you.

jaemin, i don’t know how you’re taking my passing but i hope it isn’t too hard on you, but i know it probably will be because you’re a crybaby… just kidding… not really but it’s okay because you’re my crybaby.

don’t forget to eat and shower please. if you don’t eat i will be mad at you! and please shower… you don’t want to be stinky!

jaemin has read these letters, changing from crying and laughing, but filled with love and joy as it feels like he’s just talking to you again. he’s on the last letter when he releases a big sigh. it’s as if he’s talking to you for the very last time and he just stares at the pink envelope. this one specifically has been sealed with a strawberry sticker, making him laugh as he knows you did this because he wasn’t very fond of strawberries. he opens the letter and realizes it’s somewhat shorter than the rest.

the final letter

okay, jaemin after so many letters this will be my final one. i wish i could write more but my fingers are feeling a little tired and the medicine is making me feel dizzy. i know i may have said it a million times, but a million times isn’t enough. i love you, i haven’t felt anything greater than the love you have shared with me.

your love is like the warm feeling i get when i wear your sweaters.

your love is like getting into bed after a long day.

your love is like the comfort of being embraced.

your love is learning how to love every part of myself the way you loved every part of me.

your love is like when i roll over in the bed in the morning and feel that you’re still there with me.

your love is when i’m stressed and seeing you immediately calms me down.

your love is like the endless journey of growing together.

please continue to spread your love. we may not be together but i feel your love endlessly and eternally. there is so much left in the world to love and i would be selfish to say i’m the only one that deserves your only. your love is everything i love about you, jaemin.

please continue to love. love every single part of your life, the parts before me, with me, and after me. life is still going on.

i love you endlessly.

eternally yours, y/n.

all writing here is fiction & not in any association with characters mentioned.

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raidenshogunmommy · 2 years

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"You thought this was real?"

Here it is!! The not awaited— my first fanfic on tumblr!!! I'm gonna actually use this blog omg.

Lmao Imma break hearts today

Tags: drabble, genshin impact, character×gn!reader

Genre: angst

Warnings: reader gets betrayed, mentions of s€lf h@rm in Scara's part, NOT PROOF READ!

Characters: Scaramouche, Yae Miko (seperate)

Sypnosis: they were just using you all along. Everything special you thought you had with them was all just a lie. Or was it?

Also, scara continuation here and a seperate pt2 with more characters.

Scaramouche

You stare at him in complete horror. Surely...surely, he was just playing some sort of cruel joke on you...right?

"Are you really that surprised? Did you actually expect me to fall in love?" He scoffs.

"I—" You begin but get cut off by him as tears well up in your eyes.

"I was fucking created by a psycho god! My existence is not even human if you think about it. Feelings? Love? Yeah right! You really are naive aren't you? I still can not believe I was made to put up with someone as pathetic as you. The Tsaritsa sure had her fun making me act the part of the loving boyfriend." He sighs in pure frustration.

You choke on the sob you were trying your hardest to control and your knees give out from under you. So, you were just a puppet in the fatui's masterplan, and he was just sent in to do his job. You didn't mean shit to him. And he told you as such. Deciding to remain silent as the stream of endless tears roll down your face, your gaze shifts as you watch him leave, he just gives you one last cold exprionless look and turns around leaving you crying on the floor, because he really couldn't care less now that his job was done.

That is what he wants himself and you to think, but he finds himself digging the knife that was meant to kill you into the the skin of his own arm after making sure you were out of sight. He couldn't finish his job in the end, after all he put you and himslelf through.

Yae Miko

She chuckles in amusement watching you make a fool of yourself, trying to reason with her after your entire world came crashing down when those words left her pretty lips– the ones you loved to kiss, the ones that always made you smile, the ones now causing your torment.

"Now that I'm finally done with you, I can rest easy. Being with you was like having to force myself to breathe." She flashes you a close eyed smile.

You wanted to be angry with her. You wanted to scream at her to explain herself– to ask her why you? If you were so insufferable why did she stay with you for so long? Why did she lead you on for a whole year? Was she really that good an actress?

You didn't want to believe her. But she was making it painfully hard to not, she was so convincing. It didn't seem as though she changed or she was lying but she didn't sound genuine either. But then again, that is how she always sounds. Even her smile was the same as ever, there really was no figuring her out.

A mess of emotions, you try to muster the courage to look at her without breaking, but as soon as her unchanged calm and mischivious violet hues meet your own gaze for the nth time, you start bawling like a fool. Blubbering out incomprehensible speech, you can't put up a show in front of her, even if that was all she ever did.

Her eyes turn cold at the sight of you crying. She refuses to explain herself. All you know is that you were used. All you knew is that she never loved you. All you know is that she was throwing you away.

"You always did look better weeping, it makes you appear the way you truly are. Utterly pitiful." Her tone was laced with bitterness as she watched you, her stare transfixed on your glistening cheeks.

"I-is..th-that...all you...needed t-to say?" You stutter out between sobs, trying to pull yourself together.

"Yes." She replies without hesitance. Already starting to make her exit.

In your mind you curse yourself for letting that be the last thing you chose to say, as all your memories together flash across.

And just like that it was all over.

Yae closes the door behind in a quick motion before covering her mouth hurriedly and running away. She can not be seen like this. Especially by you. Not anymore.

She apologizes to you in her head, but she can't stick around to be your girlfriend anymore.

I don't have any idea wtf that was supposed to be.

#yae miko #genshin drabbles #genshin impact #scaramouche x reader #yae miko x reader #scaramouche #genshin impact scenarios #angst #genshin fanfic #gn! reader #genshin x you #genshin impact x reader #fanfic

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be-with-me-so-happily · 2 years

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Summary: Y/N applies to be a styling intern for the One Direction crew during the Where We Are tour. As she gets better at her job and closer to the band and crew (especially Harry Styles), some of her dreams seem to be coming true, but so are some of her fears.

A/N: This one is a bit heavy. I got a little emotional writing it, to be honest, and have been nervous to post it. Please make sure to read the warnings before reading the chapter.

Warnings: Some language, alcohol consumption, short excerpt of sexual & physical assault, trip to a hospital

~~~~~

CHAPTER - 6

WE WILL FIND A WAY THROUGH THE DARK

Sept 13th, 2014 - Concert Day

It's the last day of the L.A. shows. You have decided to go after what you want. You want Harry. The problem is, you haven't seen or spoken to him since the day you left his house. Of course, you gave him space while he was in London, and figured he was busy with his family when he came back… but you kind of thought you'd see him here at the venue for the shows. There's three of them, for crying out loud.

You can't help wondering if he's avoiding you. You wouldn't really blame him. It hurts, you can't avoid that anymore, and you're feeling pretty defeated at this point.

[By trying not to mess up what you have, you've ruined the chance to get what you really want. And that's why you usually never try in the first place]

So, you put all your energy and focus into your work. It's what you've been best at, right?

As you check the dressing room to make sure everything is set up for this last L.A. show, Niall comes bounding into the room.

"Hey Superstar!" He smiles.

"What's up bud?" You say, giving the best smile you can manage.

"I haven't been able to catch up with ya!"

"I know, these past few days have been a bit wild." You acknowledge.

"Today has been pretty fun though!!" He exclaims.

It's his birthday, and you know that, but you like messing with him a bit.

"Eh, it's been fine I guess."

He pouts a little. You turn around to grab the pack of his favorite beer and some fun socks that you had been hiding, then swing back around to face him. You hold up his presents.

"Sorry it's not much bud, but happy birthday!!"

"You cheeky… thank you love. You know me. S'perfect!" He exclaims and hugs you tightly.

"Oh! I came in here to invite you to my party. It's short notice, and in Vegas, but I feel like you're one of my good friends and I want ya to come."

You freeze for a minute. You've wanted to see Harry this whole time, but now you're also slightly scared to confront him and confess your feelings.

"It's gonna be me, Liam, and Zayn. The band boys and their girls… a couple of other friends… Oh, and Natalie said she'd go if you do."

So, no Harry. As scared as you just were, you are slightly disappointed now, but maybe it's better that he isn't going. You can have a nice distraction from the emotional turmoil you've been having. You don't like feeling this way, so a trip could help you reset.

"Okay bud, I'll be there for you!"

"Wooo!" He says as he throws up his arms triumphantly.

"Imma try and get some flights together for ya for tomorrow, since it's so last minute."

"Tomorrow? For goodness sakes Niall!" You laugh.

"I'm twenty-one now!! Living it up baby!" He raises both his arms again, lets out one final "wooo" and heads out to see Lou for his hair.

~~~~~

The guys flood the dressing room all together, making it a bit more chaotic than usual. Harry, however, got ready somewhere else. [Yep, definitely feels like he's avoiding you]

You're feeling the hurt bubble up again, so you head to catering and see if you can score a smoothie.

Drink in hand, you make your way to the common room. As jumbled as your brain feels, you still love watching the shows. You can't help but feel a sense of joy when you watch them. You still sing and dance to all the songs, it never gets old.

But as the encore begins and the boys start singing 'Right Now", your chest starts getting tight and tears start forming. This has never happened before. You look at Natalie, "I need to go, I don't feel good at all."

"Let's go back to the dressing room." She ushers you out and walks back with you. "What's going on?"

"I don't know. Once the song started, my chest started hurting. I must be sick" You decide.

Natalie chuckles, "or you might be feeling upset over the Harry thing?"

You shake your head. "That's pathetic."

Natalie lets out a mild chuckle and you give her a warning look. "No Y/N, that's called heartache."

"Pathetic." You roll your eyes.

[You usually don't let feelings control you… you can't let them control you]

You both fall silent and finish your clean-up/tear down duties. Sarah and Jade come in a few minutes later as the show has ended. Sarah's saying, "Best Song Ever was something else tonight" as they start to help you.

Jade adds, "I think that might be my favorite song!"

Sarah replies, "I think mine is… Little Black Dress!" Then she laughs. "Kind of fitting for a stylist intern right?" Everyone chuckles.

Natalie contributes to the conversation. "Mine has to be Alive, for sure." [That's fitting for her. She doesn't hold back and lives her life]

There's silence, and when you look up you realize they are staring at you, waiting for your answer.

"Oh, um… my favorite song?... 'Right Now'…" you sigh.

"That one makes me super emotional. Feels almost like a yearning for someone you don't have." Jade states.

"I guess." You clear your throat and instantly drop your eyes down towards the floor. [How ironic that it's your favorite song]

~~~~~

Sept 14th, 2014

Niall had managed to get the original flights for you and Natalie switched to ones for Vegas. Sarah and Jade are headed to Phoenix for the show in a few days. You'll meet them there later tomorrow. Sarah is definitely a little jealous that she wasn't invited, but you and Natalie are a lot closer to the guys than she is. That's just how it is.

You've packed and made sure that the house is clean, and head to the airport with Natalie.

You're determined to focus on the excitement of experiencing Vegas for the first time and celebrate Niall's (and Liam's) birthdays. It's about them, and you love them, so you'll be the best friend you can be. Natalie, and a margarita or two always helps with that.

~~~~~

"Okay… is this too much?" Natalie asks, turning around to model her full-sequined gold dress with a plunging neckline.

"It's Vegas honey! Nothing is too much here!"

"I'm just trying to match your hotness level…" she exclaims, giving you a once over and then winking.

You look in the mirror at yourself. You're in a dark striped multicolored bodycon 'bandage' dress where the pattern wraps around your body.at different angles. You've paired it with some strappy gold heels and thick gold hoops. You look sexy. You feel sexy.

"We are a pair of babes!"

You meet the guys at their suite. Niall was sweet enough to get you one too, something you'll try hard to repay, so their room was just down the hall.

Liam opens the door and gasps. "Hell! Boys!! We won't need security tonight, because these ladies will be drawing all the attention!"

You both laugh and roll your eyes. "Happy birthdays boys!" You yell as you enter the room.

You give them hugs and they offer you both a shot. "Oh no… this is going to be a very entertaining night."

"It's Vegas baby!" Yells Niall. And you all head down to the club.

~~~~~

You don't ever consider having "perks" of interning with One Direction, but you've gotta admit that it is definitely nice to be able to walk right into the club and be taken to a VIP area. It's not as crowded as the dance floor below. A waitress comes to take your drink order and you're free to start this party!

A few more margaritas have been consumed, but you don't care. You're not trying to conceal any feelings this time… in fact, you're trying to forget them altogether… and so there's a freedom over you to just let loose and have fun.

"Happy birthday boys!!!!" Someone shouts, and you all cheer!

You dance with Natalie and the other girls of the group to every song that plays. You sing along, and make up words when you don't know them. You're laughing, taking selfies, and joking around with the guys. It's one of the best nights- trying to top the rooftop party.

One of the girls leans over to you while you're all standing against the railing. "There's a guy down there who hasn't taken his eyes off of you since we got up here."

You look down and see a good-looking guy glance your way and raise his glass. He's tall, dark features, with a thin wide smile.

"He could be checking out Zayn for all we know," you burst out laughing.

"No, no. Any move you make, his eyes follow."

Not that you're looking for anything, but it's nice to feel desired at this moment.

At some point, Liam decides he wants to go down to the dance floor and attempt to break dance. The girls are eager to follow so they can document this potentially embarrassing display. They convince you to make your way down as well, and encourage you to talk to the guy at the bar. You're easily convinced given the amount of margaritas in you.

You start off by watching Liam, laughing at some of his moves, but impressed with some others. You're glad you're witnessing this in person. You grab Natalie for safety, and confidence, and head over to the bar. Not surprisingly, the guy quickly makes his way over to you.

"Hi there! Can I buy you ladies a drink?"

Natalie, not one to turn a free one down, immediately orders two more margaritas.

"Have you been having fun up there?" He points to the VIP section.

"Yeah, having a great time actually."

Natalie hands you the margarita, winks, and just stands next to you, not wanting to interrupt the conversation.

The guy starts to talk about his job and asks you about yours. You are enjoying the conversation, plus he is really handsome. Then he asks if you want to dance. You're trying to be bold so you agree. He takes your hand and leads the way. Natalie stays at the bar, giving you a thumbs up when you turn to look at her.

"I just have to say, that dress is amazing on you." He looks up and down and bites his lips a little.

For a split second, you wonder why you weren't blushing.

It's going well and you're enjoying yourself. He dances behind you with his hands on your hips, and you can feel him getting excited. It's not the most comfortable moment, so you turn to dance with him face to face. He pulls you in closer and rests his face in your neck, lightly pressing his lips on your skin. His hands are suddenly moving over your ass. You attempt to pull back slightly, thinking he's just a bit drunk and being a bit too forward, but he grabs you tighter and tries to crash his lips onto yours. You attempt to pull away again.

"Hey!" You try to yell over the music.

"Come on!" He says. "You're hot and I know you think I am!" Then he turns you back around and grinds on your ass.

You start to panic, searching desperately for Natalie. Thankfully she sees what's happening and is trying to push her way to you. She waves for the guys and gets their attention.

"Please. Please let me go!"

"You want this." He protests.

When you continue to squirm out of his grip, he pushes you. At that exact moment, Liam appears, grabs the guy, and pushes him away.

"What's wrong with you mate?" He looks at you. "Are you okay darling?" You're shaking and a bit in shock.

The guy lunges at Liam and they start to fight. Security rushes over. You instinctively try to get in the middle and break it up, but he is still swinging at Liam. You suddenly get knocked to the floor and your head hits the ground.

~~~~~

You wake up in a private room of a hospital. You turn to see Natalie sitting in the chair, typing away on her phone. She notices your movements and snaps her head up.

"Oh thank goodness Y/N!" She yelps.

"Why am I here? Is Liam okay?" You ask.

"He's alright, but he broke his arm. The doctor says you have a mild concussion."

You hold back tears and hang your head. "This is all my fault! I'm so fucking stupid!"

"Y/N! This is not your fault!! That asshole should have never put his hands on you!"

"I shouldn't have had that much to drink. I shouldn't have gone down to the bar. I shouldn't have agreed to dance with him." You gripe and add, "I shouldn't have gone to Vegas!"

You suddenly feel the throbbing pain on your head. "Oh god!" You bellow.

"You hit your head when you fell honey. You blacked out." Natalie explains.

Just then, Niall and Zayn. "Hey Superstar. I'm so glad you're alright."

"Shit, Niall..." you cry out, "I'm so sorry for ruining your party! I'm so sorry!"

"Don't do that." He shakes his head. "I'm sorry this happened."

Now you shake your head. "Is Liam okay?"

Zayn answers. "He'll be right. Don't worry. We just want you to be alright." He comes and holds your hand.

You're so grateful to have people who care about you so much.

A doctor walks in and explains that you'll be in some pain and you'll need to rest up for about a week or so.

[So not only did you ruin the celebration, but now you're inconveniencing Amelia and the styling team. This right here is why you don't make bold moves]

Zayn leaves to check on Liam. Natalie calls Amelia to give her the news. Amelia insists that you go back to L.A. and stay with friends to rest and to not come back until you are feeling one hundred percent better. "Not a moment sooner!" You hear her demand.

Niall looks over to Natalie. "Are you going back with Y/N tomorrow?"

"Of course I am! But… I'll probably need to help out at the show in Phoenix the next day." She looks at you. "I'm so sorry honey." She looks at Niall then back at you, speaking as vaguely as possible… "is there anywhere you can stay?"

Niall steps out to answer a call.

You shake your head. "No. My mom is dealing with enough, and Sam is in school. I don't want him distracted with worry. Please don't even tell them. I'll just stay at a hotel or something."

Niall walks back in. "Harry is on his way."

"What? Niall! No!" You yell.

"What? What's wrong?"

Your head starts throbbing even more. "Call him back, he doesn't need to come."

"Yeah that's not happening." He chuckles.

"This is getting so much worse." You complain.

[On top of everything, they're having Harry come to get you? As if he hasn't dealt with enough from you…]

You have to hold back tears, you don't want to break down. You debate telling Niall what happened. You look over at Natalie and she understands exactly what you want. She takes Niall outside of the room to fill in him on what's happened between the two of you. You can trust him.

Your body decides to shut down and you fall asleep.

~~~~~

Sept 15th, 2014

Whispers fill the room. You wake up but don't immediately open your eyes, curious about what's being said.

"She feels bad enough." You hear Natalie say.

"I honestly don't care. It's the best solution." A familiar voice responds. You can't make it out yet.

"She's gonna fight you on it." Natalie adds.

"Again, don't care. I'm doing this." The voice replies. You choose to open your eyes.

You see Natalie straight in front of your hospital bed, as expected. You shift your eyes to the second voice and feel as if you could pass out again. It's Harry.

[He shouldn't be here. There isn't any reason for him to be here]

Natalie notices you're awake. "Hey honey, feel any better?" All you can do is shrug.

You're just staring at Harry. You can't really tell if his expression is of concern or annoyance.

"Hey. I-" he starts, but you interrupt him.

"You didn't need to come. I'm fine."

He frowns. "You're not fine. I'm here now so…"

Natalie interrupts quickly, "the doctor said you'll be discharged soon. I'll go find him to let him know you're awake." She leaves the two of you alone in the room.

Harry moves to the chair and scoots it closer to the bed. "I can't believe that asshole grabbed you."

You don't know what to say. You are still shocked that he is there. Nia really shouldn't have called him.

"Glad Liam gave him what he deserved." He adds.

"Aren't you the one who tries to extend kindness to everyone?"

He clears his throat. "Umm… so when you can leave, we'll get to the airport and take the jet back to L.A."

You lower your head down as much as possible. You feel like you're inconveniencing so many people.

"And the car will be there to take us to my place."

Your head immediately snaps back up. "What? No no no. I can't let you do that. You definitely don't need to do that."

He frowns again. "You need someone to help you while you recover." His phone rings. "It's my mum, I'm gonna have them stay at a hotel so you can have some privacy."

Natalie walks back in with the doctor.

You pinch the bridge of your nose and try not to cry. "This is too much!"

"Does your head hurt?" She worries.

"Yeah." You sigh. "But not from the concussion."

~~~~~

Harry didn't let you argue. You got on the jet with him, and Natalie, and he was constantly making sure you were comfortable.

He offers you one of the biggest guest rooms and Natalie helps you to get settled.

"You know, this isn't the worst thing in the world…" she mentions.

"Oh yeah? How so?" You roll your eyes, not believing she had a good point.

"Maybe this is a chance for you to recover physically… and maybe even emotionally…"

"Natalie Vettle. Philosopher." You roll your eyes again and laugh.

"Sorry that I have to leave you." She gives you a hug. "I love you. I'll see you back there soon, m'kay?"

"Hopefully sooner rather than later." You smirk.

You unpack a few clothes and toiletries, and just sit with your eyes closes and back against the headboard when you hear a knock on the door. "Come in."

"I'm going to order dinner. Would you like some?" Harry asks.

"That would actually be great, thank you."

"Natalie told me your favorite comfort food is spaghetti with meat sauce, so I was thinking Italian." He says proudly with a small smile.

[Mental note- scorn her for that later]

"Perfect. Thank you."

~~~~~

Once dinner has arrived, you make your way to the kitchen where the food is set up.

"My mum and sister are at a hotel. So, feel free to get comfortable." He encourages.

"Thank you." That seems to be all you can say at the moment, and you sit on one of the stools.

There's silence while you eat. It's not comfortable like last time. How are you supposed to be comfortable in this situation? Last time you were here… the last time that you saw him… you had kissed so passionately and then completely rejected him. He doesn't deserve that. And you don't deserve the kindness he is showing.

You take the last small bites of the spaghetti.

"Please don't feel like you have to go out of your way for me, Harry."

"I don't. I want to help."

"Thank you." You say, once again.

"Anytime. Never a question." He responds, a small smirk appearing.

[He's too good. Way too good. Why did you walk away from having this good thing in your life?]

You don't mean to, but you let out a very audible sigh. You start to feel those pesky feelings bubble up again. If you stay on the stool much longer, you might cry. And the way he is looking at you with such care and concern is not helping you keep it together.

"I might go back to the room if that's okay. My head is killing me."

"Of course, whatever makes you comfortable here, Sun-" he quickly stops himself. "Let me know if you need anything else."

"I probably won't stop saying 'thank you' Harry." You sigh. "I'm sorry they made you do this."

"What?"

"I can't thank you enough, I'm really grateful."

"No… what was that about 'them' making me do this?"

"Well… Niall calling you to come get me and have me stay here."

He looks absolutely shocked."Y/N, nobody made me do this."

Now it's your turn to say, "what?"

"No one made me do this. Niall texted me telling me what happened. I called him and told him I was coming."

You feel a lump in your throat. You think there's some tears forming, betraying you. You can only manage a whisper. "Why?"

He furrows his brow. "You shouldn't be alone right now, and I couldn't stand the fact…" He pauses and clears his throat. "I just wanted to help out."

[Tears are coming, please not now. Not now]

There's silence for a minute or two. You are staring down at your feet.

He gets up and hesitantly walks over to you. You don't look up until his feet are almost touching yours.

"Would you be comfortable if I gave you a hug?" He gently asks. He's too good. He's too caring. You don't deserve this.

But you nod, and he wraps his arms around you, so tenderly. He's too good, and he's too caring. You really don't deserve this.

"Get some rest, m'kay?" He rests his chin on top of your head and you can feel his heart beating fast. You wonder if he can feel yours doing the same thing. "Please let me know if you need anything. I want to help."

[Little does he know how much this hug is doing that for you]

~~~~~

Sept 20th, 2014

It was really difficult to accept his help. You still felt so guilty- for how you treated him ipn the first place, and for how nice he is being despite that.

If he was ever out of the house, he would occasionally text you to check in or see if he could bring anything back for you. The most surprising, thoughtful, and guilt-inducing gesture was that he came back to L.A. for a couple of days after the guys had a show in Arizona. You almost burst into tears.

He was being so good to you. You had more awesome conversations at times, watched some movies, and ate a lot of spaghetti. You didn't deserve this, but you were thoroughly enjoying it, and happy that you didn't have to think about that night in Vegas.

[Stop, stop, stop. Hold it together. He's just being a nice guy, and maybe even just a good friend]

The guys had an event in Vegas tonight for iHeartRadio. You told Amelia you would be fine to go, which you really were, but you're still recovering, according to the doctor who is being annoyingly cautious. You suppose it's best, but you are anxious to get back on tour and doing your job. So, you had to do the next best thing and watch it on TV.

An hour after it ended, you get a text from Natalie.

:natalie: hey sweetie, missed you tonight. how are you feeling?

:you: i'm good, better. the show looked good tonight.

:natalie: it was fun. the guys miss you.

:you: tell them i miss them too

:natalie: harry has been on edge all day, please come back soon so he can get off my back about checking in :)

:you: sorry he's being too much, but the doctor said about another week :(

:natalie: i love him, but i might kill him

:you: don't do that, their entire fandom would bring you down

:natalie: fine. i love you.

:you: i love you too. tell the guys the same.

:natalie: especially harry? ;)

:you: i'm summoning the fans

~~~~~

Sept 30th, 2014 - Music Video

You get up early, for the first time since you got to Harry's house.

You are excited, because the doctor cleared you to go back to work, which is perfect timing, because everyone is back in L.A. to shoot a music video. Apparently it's going to be really elaborate and you can't wait to get back to work.

When you finally arrive, your brain is overwhelmed by the outrageous set.

There are so many people, but Natalie and the girls instantly spot you and run over. Amelia follows shortly after. "Hey lady! Welcome back!" She reminds you to take a break whenever you need it, especially since there will be so much going on. You assure her you are fine, but also assure her that you'll let her know if you do.

She suddenly looks slightly past you with a big smirk on her face. "Come to the trailer in about 10 minutes so we can go over things."

You feel a presence behind you and instantly turn around. Harry is standing there, bouncing in place, with a huge smile spread across his face.

"Yay. You're back!" He reaches half way for a hug, but waits until you give him permission with a nod, and wraps his arms around you.

He whispers, "feels better that you're here." As he pulls away, he coughs, grins, and adds, "I know you can pull something fun for me to wear."

"Feel better that I'm finally out of your house?" You joke. "Thank you, again."

The set is chaotic. So many things are happening. You help Harry pick out his outfit. You both like this cheetah print coat and he commented "it's warm, and I'm going to be wearing a coat, seems right." And you laugh, and he adds, "but I'm glad you're here to persuade me to be bolder."

~~~~~

It was a long, but spectacular day. The music video wraps up with a giant rain scene and everyone is drenched.

Amelia asks you to grab Harry's coat to pack up, so you head to his trailer, and knock on the door.

"Come in," so you enter, but immediately stop in your tracks. Harry is standing there shirtless, with his hair in a bun, and still dripping wet. You unintentionally gasp and he turns around.

He chuckles and shows off those damn, deep dimples.

You try to form words. "Umm… Amelia… I- I just need the coat." [Keep it professional damnit!]

He smirks again. "M'kay love, gimme one second."

He puts in his cross necklace, and hands you the coat. As you reach for it, you accidentally grab his hand with it. You feel like you're not breathing at this point, so you just blurt out "neat" and run out.

Natalie sees you and laughs. "You good girlie?"

You shake your head, "must be the effects from the concussion… my heart is racing and I feel flushed."

Natalie laughs again. "Yeah, Y/N, probably not the concussion.

"I can't let my feelings do this. This can't happen again Natalie."

"I think it already is sweetie."

~~~~~

Series Masterlist || Chapter 5 || Chapter 7

Taglist: @watermelonsugacry @tw1nflamebruis3

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superfics-forone · 3 years

Text

Just Friends

SUMMARY: Sam asks the group who they think are the “hottest” members of the team. You don’t make the cute for Bucky’s top five.

Bucky x TALL!Reader

W/C: 5,800

WARNINGS: angst, swearing (like two f bombs), cannon level violence, Bucky being an idiot (it’s a warning), physical insecurities, fake science

A/N: I wrote this because the top 5 situation actually happened to me IRL and when you don’t make someone you like’s list, it sucks. Also, this is in no way meant as being against people who are smaller! I am just a tall/plus size woman and sometimes that really makes you feel like you’re unattractive to people because you don’t fit the gender norm. Let me know what you think! I’m pretty new at this so I’d appreciate the feedback!

Also, HUGE shout out to @princessmisery666 for being so patient and supportive! Thank you for being my beta! Your comments were so incredibly helpful!

The best part about working with Bucky was that you got to see him everyday. The worst part was that you were constantly reminded that he wasn’t attracted to you.

You knew you were a good looking woman, people would often tell you that. It usually happened when you weren’t necessarily feeling your prettiest. Somehow that made it worse. Others would compliment you but he never would. Even when you knew you looked good- like you had put in extra effort and actually tried that day- still he would give you nothing.

You sat across from him in the common room looking at all the other Avengers wondering why he didn’t feel the same when you finally got your answer.

“Alright man,” Sam called out to the group. “Top five, let’s go.”

“Top five?” asked Clint, not sure if he wanted to know the answer. “Top five what?”

Everyone looked back to Sam, - “Top five on who you think is lookin’ most fine”.

“You want us to rate each other?” You asked incredulously.

“Naw, man!” Sam replied. “I want to know who you think are the top five most attractive! Male and female!”

You slunk back into the sofa, both curious and terrified of the conversation to come.

You heard huffs from the others but no one objected. Vision went first and of course he could only answer with; “I believe all of you are inherently lovely. I couldn’t possibly pick a top five of those who I find to be most attractive.” As soon as he finished and the room was no longer focused on him though he leaned over to Wanda and said something in her ear that made her blush.

You brought your cup up to your lips to hide your smile. You loved how happy they were after having been through so much heartbreak.

Sam went next, “Imma say, Wanda, Nat, Gamora’s got it goin’ on…for an alien…Hill - don’t tell her I said that- and…Y/N,” he said throwing you a wink.

You smiled but shook your head with a roll of your eyes. You knew the only reason he said your name was because you were in the room. He was trying to be kind. Men didn’t seem to be actively lining up to be with you…it might have something to do with them being intimidated by you being an Avenger but who could possibly know

“Sam you would think anything with legs that gave you the time of day was hot,” Bucky shot.

The others laughed but Sam shot back, “alright, Tin Man, who’s on your list? Okoye?”

“Yeah for one! I would be dead before I could make a move but sure! She’s dangerous and stunning!” He took a swig of bourbon as if he was done.

“Alright then who else?” Wanda leaned forward winking at you.

You shot her a warning look. You had only told her how you felt about Bucky once on a drunken night after finding out he had gone on date with another recruit. Jealousy had reared its ugly head and she could feel your angst that night. You had asked Wanda how; “A tiny little thing that would barely hold her own in the ring,” could possibly catch his eye. It was as if the only thing he saw you as was an ear to listen to his problems and a soldier he could rely on in the field. You had seen them together multiple times since then and every time it pained you more.

She was everything you weren’t. Barely five foot, two inches tall with a skinny frame to match, and a nicely formed backside. In reality you couldn’t be mad at Bucky. He deserved to be happy. He was your friend and you wanted that for him. You just wanted that particular happiness too.

“Okay, okay!” Bucky’s hands came up in surrender as he finished his drink and leaned back to think, He sat so close to you his left bicep of his folded arms brushed yours with every breath he took.“Okoye? Sure…uh… in no particular order…Wanda, Nat, Darcy, and the little woman, Kris, from reception.”

“It seems, Mr. Barnes”, said Vision, “that you prefer mates who are significantly smaller than you. I do believe that of that group, Wanda is the tallest one.”

“Which isn’t really saying much because I’m only five, six”, she complained.

“The perfect height my dear.” Wanda smiled at that and kissed Vision’s cheek .

You took another long sip of your drink as you registered what had been said. Your stomach soured as you finished the glass. Not so much from the alcohol as from the realization that the man who you had secretly been pinning over didn’t even list you as attractive enough to make his top five.

You felt like you knew why. It was just too much. You weren’t small and dainty like those on his list. You had big bones and a can do attitude. You wouldn’t take crap from people. And because you were so tall you could come off as intimidating…or so some men had told you.

“I’m going to get another drink,” You whispered to no one in particular.

But Sam really couldn’t read a room and he called you out. “No, no! Who’s on your list Y/N?”

“Oh no!” You said dryly. “I’d have to be much drunker for that conversation. For now, I'll keep my opinions to myself.”

You spotted Bucky’s surprised face before you made your way over to the bar. The conversation carried on behind you as you refilled your glass. Thoughts of Bucky’s revelation clouding your mind. You were never going to be good enough for him because you were just too big. Too tall. Too much. He liked the smallest, most petite women in the compound. Feeling your emotions swelling,you decided to grab the bottle and made your way quietly out of the room while the ruckus continued.

Once on your floor you closed the door behind you with a forceful slam, “FRIDAY!! Lock the door and don’t open it for anyone!!”

“Yes, Miss Y/L/N.”

The rest of the night was spent on the floor in your sweats drinking from your bottle of whiskey and feeling sorry for yourself and all the things you couldn’t be because of biology.

You weren’t sure if it was a drunken stupor or your imagination but at one point you could have sworn you heard a knock only for it to go away just as quickly.

…

The next day you had an awful hangover and didn’t get out of bed. Bucky came to your door for your normal morning run.

“Tell him I’m not going, Friday.”

“He would like to know why, Miss.”

“Tell him it’s my time of the month.”

“Your time of the month was last week, Miss.”

“Who’s side are you on, Friday? Just tell him I’m sick.”

“Very well, Miss.”

It was silent for a few moments and you had thought that would be enough to get Bucky off your back for now.

“Mr. Barnes would like to know if you’d like to see Dr. Cho, Miss.”

“Uuuugggghhhh,” you rolled out of bed and marched over, irritated that the one person you didn’t want to see was at your door.Pulling it open with a huff you practically screamed. “What?!?”

“Woah!” Bucky jumped back startled at your disheveled appearance and puffy eyes. “I just want to make sure you’re alright, doll. You didn’t come back last night and you never answered the door when I came to check on you.”

So there was a knock last night.

You couldn’t look him in the eye as your eyes filled with tears again, this time with shame. “I’m fine, Bucky.” You started shutting the door quickly and he stuck his hand on it preventing you from closing it again.

“Y/N…what’s…”

“Bucky, I just need some rest okay?” You cut him off, “I’m fine. I promise I’ll be right as rain tomorrow.” You smiled weakly.

Bucky searched your face as if trying to find what you weren’t telling him in your eyes. But you were an Avenger and you knew how to school your features to show nothing.

Bucky sighed and shook his head, “alright, doll. I’m here if you want to talk about anything.”

“Yes, fine,” you said pushing him out the door. Your eyes had flooded with tears again. You didn’t look up to see Bucky’s hurt and concerned face as you closed the door again and put your back to it.

You held your breath listening for his footsteps to retreat before sinking to the floor and crying.

…

The next day was an all out avoid Bucky day. You weren’t sure you could take the questions and worried looks he was sure to give you. Instead, you decided that what you needed was time away from such temptation. And so, you went in to ask Steve for an overseas long assignment.

“You sure about this one, Y/N. It’s a 9 month solo mission. It’s going to be long and it’s going to be lonely.”

“Yes. I’m sure. I need some time to myself.”

Steve looked at you with understanding and pity. He could see how you felt about Bucky even if he couldn’t get his best friend to see it as well.

“Alright,” he said, “suit up. You leave in 2 hours.”

South Africa wasn’t the worst assignment. It wouldn’t take long for you to get the information you needed. And the separation from Bucky would be good for you.

You finished checking your last weapon and loaded it as well as a pair of throwing knives, a gift from Bucky, into your duffle before looking around your room one more time.

You headed to the door and almost made it out until the picture of you and Bucky on your dresser made you stop. Picking it up you smiled at the memory of the minor league baseball game you’d attended together. You had won tickets and no one else was available that night. When you’d offered the tickets to Bucky you couldn’t believe that he said yes! It was the true start of your friendship, talking about life and how much it had changed for him but also how little it had changed for you. He couldn’t believe it when you started singing all the words to “I’ll never smile again”.

“You think I don’t know music? I’m quite cultured, Mr. Barnes!” You had said with a laugh.

“I never said you weren’t, sweetheart!”

Coming back out of your revelry with a start you put the picture back down on the dresser and turned to the door. You were going to get over this infatuation, even if it killed you. Supposedly time heals all wounds. Well you weren’t sure if there was ever going to be enough time but you could get distance.

…

Hours later Bucky came in to tell you about the relationship problems he was having with the girl from reception. She just didn’t seem to understand him and kept picking fights. You had become his confidant and had saved his relationship once before so would most likely be able to do it again.

He was almost to your room when he noticed your door was ajar. Slowing he moved closer and pushed it in silently. The room was neat and quiet. Your bed folded nicely as though it was always that way.

Bucky knew that you never made your bed until you were right about to get in it. Or unless you were going on a trip.

Checking carefully he started to notice things missing. Your favorite slippers were gone. Your tooth brush and favorite stuffed animal turtle were also missing. All of the things that you felt you had to have with you were gone.

Then he saw the picture frame on the dresser. Picking it up he too smiled at the memory, then frowned. It was still here. You almost always took this with you. Why was it still here but everything else you held of value was gone.

“Friday, where is Y/N?”

“Miss Y/L/N has volunteered for a mission, sir.”

“Where?”

“That information is classified.”

“Okay, when will she be back?”

“That information is classified.”

“Alright, who else went on the mission,” he asked hoping whoever it was would have your back.

“All other Avengers are currently in the compound.”

“So she went by herself?” Bucky fumed.

“That information is classified.”

“Damn robots!”

Bucky stormed out and found Steve in the kitchen.

“Where did you send her, punk!

Steve didn’t even look up from his newspaper, knowing exactly what his best friend was talking about.

“She’ll be fine, Buck. She just needs some time to herself.”

“So send her to Fiji! Not a solo mission!!”

“This is her call Bucky. You’ve got to trust her.”

Bucky spun on his heel and headed to the computer lab. He knew he was being irrational but if no one else was going to look after your well-being then he was going to have to do it himself.

It took him all day but he finally unencrypted the files for your mission. You were to carry out a recon mission in Port Elizabeth on a supposed Hydra base. It was a far cry from Fiji but you wouldn’t be in immediate danger.

Still he came in everyday to check in on your reports and find out how the events in the country were progressing. He had even convinced Torres to help him set up notifications to his phone if something were to go wrong. He had, very nicely, threatened him with knives if he didn’t set up Stark’s satellite to keep an eye on you.

After three weeks he was really starting to miss your company. Every time he went out with Kris from reception he realized that she just wasn’t as interesting as you. They didn’t have the same camaraderie and chemistry as the two of you did.

So when his phone dinged at 2:30am he looked at the notification. It was a satellite image of you on your apartment porch drinking coffee. You seemed at ease and calm at your small table. Your hair down and wearing a long red dress. He went to the live feed of the satellite but when he did you weren’t there.

Bucky refreshed the page again thinking it may be just an error. But his rising heartbeat made him think differently. When the screen came back he noticed the upturned coffee mug and the newspapers on the ground.

Bucky flew from his bed and raced down the hall to the command room. Steve and Tony were already there, still in their pajamas.

“…it’s not as if she has a tracker in her, Stark!”

“Well maybe she should! Maybe we should make it a standard issue! Everyone gets a tracker! Friday! Make a note!”

“Yes sir.” replied the AI.

“Tony, we need to focus on the…”

“Where is she?!” Bucky growled.

Both men turned around in surprise. Steve recovered first, his eyes sympathetic for his friend’s worry. “We’re not sure, Buck. These images were only taken 4 hours ago.” He clicked to zoom in closer, “but we did get this.”

He zoomed all the way into the kitchen window behind where you’d sat drinking coffee, where a face reflected in the glass. Bucky looked on in rage, hands in tight fists, as the image became clearer and Zemo came into focus.

…

You awoke with a start, unaware of your surroundings. You sat on a bed in a bare room with a single one way mirror. A metal chair sat by the wall and you noticed no handle on the door. Trying to piece together what had happened you recalled your last memory.

A beautiful morning, the sun shining on the water, a freshly brewed cup of coffee. You sat in your apartment in Port Elizabeth, a pain in your neck…

“Zemo,” you whispered.

“Ah, you’re awake,” said the speaker above you. “I’m sorry about the dramatics but it was necessary. You’re a very important piece of the puzzle.”

“Let me guess,” you said as you rolled your eyes. “You don’t like the way the world is being saved by the Avengers and you think you could do better.”

“Actually I want something else, мой дорогой. I need you.”

“What?” you cried befuddled. “Why on earth would you need me?”

“Do you know what TX-39 is?”

“Yes, I have an entire codex of arbitrary numbers logged away in my brain,” you retorted.

Zemo didn’t pause at your sarcasm. “TX-39 is the compound used to create nucleotides that bond onto nerve endings. By doing so they suspend brain signals stopping all neuro function and rendering the subject immoble. Something you have experienced first hand. By combining a nanotech inhibitor with this nerve ending your subject’s direct motor function is now open to...suggestions.”

You sat astounded as you registered what he had told you. You looked down at your hands but you didn’t feel different. There was no way something like this could work.

“What better way to get rid of a super soldier than to create your own?” Zemo said. You felt a slight buzz in your spine as you stood up quickly trying to resist. Running to the mirror you pulled back your arm, ready to punch your way out, but an inch from the glass your arm stopped. “Ironic that the Soldat will come to save you, only to be the one who needs to be saved.” With that you felt the electricity in your spine disappear and your body was your own again.

Frustration built within you as you sat back on the bed for a moment processing his statement. Your face became more and more incredulous until finally you burst out laughing. You continued laughing harder and harder at the absurdity of Zemo’s reasoning.

“You think I’m the one he is going to come after,” you laughed. “You think you picked the right mouse for your trap? You’re going to wait a long time if you think he’s going to come and get me.”

During your first few weeks away you had missed Bucky fiercely. Leaving him behind so abruptly had felt like severing a part of yourself, but the last few weeks had been good for you. You had forgotten what it was like to rely on yourself. You had grown into yourself again and had realized how little Bucky had actually cared for you when he never came to find you. He hadn’t so much as picked up the phone after you had left. It was as if you had never existed in the first place.

“Bucky doesn’t care about me,” you said sardonically. “He never has. We are barely even friends.You picked the wrong mouse, Zemo. ”

“We’ll see, дорогой,” and with a click he was gone.

Your brain shifted in and out of the conversation with Zemo. Looking down at your hands, you prayed it wasn’t true. You knew that what had happened at the window was real but you didn’t want to believe it. You had been turned into a weapon to hurt your friends. To hurt Bucky.

Crossing your arms over your chest you laid down on the bed, rolled over to face the wall, and cried.

…

Avengers Compound

“There is a five mile radius around Agent Y/L/N last known location,” said Fury. “Two man teams will sweep the area in a grid formation while the drones scan for energy signatures. Any questions?”

All those around the table sat silent, but nodded confirmation of their understanding of the objective. Fury looked around the room, “This mother fucker took one of ours and I wanna know why. Let’s get going.”

Bucky stood up from the table and made his way out of the room to the Quinjet hangar. Steve pulled on his arm before entering the plane. “I know what’s going through your mind right now Buck, but we are going to get her back”.

Bucky looked at the ground before raising his eyes to his friend. “He knew how to get to me, Steve. He always knows where to hurt me. He couldn’t use you. You’re too difficult to overpower. So he had to pick her. I just,” Bucky wasn’t sure how to finish his thought. Words never came easily to him and he wasn’t sure he could really express what he was feeling. “I just want her safe.”

After you had left Bucky felt hollow inside. He hadn’t realized how much joy you brought to his day with your smiles and jokes. Always knowing what to say, or at least, what he needed to hear. Your departure made him realize he needed you. Boarding the jet Bucky knew that no matter what happened he was going to tell you how he felt.

…

The team had been sweeping through the city for what felt like hours and there still hadn’t been any developments. Walking through another alleyway Bucky scanned the cobblestone streets. He was beginning to lose hope at ever finding you at all when he saw an uneven line in between two buildings.

Pressing his comm link he called out, “Steve, I’ve got something. I’m going to check it out.”

“Bucky, wait for backup. We’ll come to you.”

Feeling along the wall Bucky felt a draft between the cracks. Unholstering the gun at his hip he pushed against the wall feeling it give way.

“I’m going in. Follow my location.”

“Bucky, wait!” Steve called.

Bucky ignored his calls and continued down the dimly lit hall. The walls opened up to a staircase leading down to a command room. The musky scent of decay and scotch filled Bucky’s nostrils.

“Privet, Soldat,” Zemo called from the darkness.

Bucky whirled around to find nothing.

“Have you come for your little mouse?”

Still searching, Bucky said nothing as the sound came from a different corner of the room.

“Have you realized how much you miss her?”

Bucky circled again, coming up to a window.

“I wonder what it is? Is it her sweetness that draws you? Or her willingness to see you for more than the killer you are?”

Bucky frowned. Zemo was playing with him.

“Or have you realized that her fire is what draws you to her? She does have a talented tongue. I’ve seen her put it to good use,” Zemo provoked. “I have enjoyed having her in my company, but it seems you really never appreciated her spirit, did you?”

Bucky continued searching the room as Zemo continued his monologue. Coming up to the computer he saw a paused video feed. It played as soon as he stepped forward.

Bucky saw you in a room, still in your red sundress. Your hair was matted and you had the look in your eye of anger and exasperation. When you spoke, Bucky felt the wind rush out of his lungs.

“Bucky doesn’t care about me,” you said sardonically. “He never has. We are barely even friends.”

“A pity she never saw you care, but I suppose it’s only fair that you tell her now.”

The door beside the window clicked open with a beep. You came out of the cell with a look of wary surprise on your face. “Bucky?”

“Now is your moment, Sergeant Barnes. Why not tell her how you feel before it's too late,” called Zemo.

Bucky holstered his gun and walked toward you. “Y/N? Are you okay? Come on, let's get out of here.”

He grabbed your hand and turned to go but you were rooted to the spot. Your breathing became heavy as you felt the tingling sensation in your spine again.

“Bucky, I need you to leave,” you cried, dread dripping from your voice.

“What? No,sweetheart, come on! I’m not leaving you.”

“Bucky, I…” you started.

“Last chance to declare yourself, Soldat.”

Looking up in anger, Bucky yelled. “Shut up, Zemo. I’m not performing for you-” Bucky’s head turned in surprise as you punched him across the face. “What the hell, Y/N?”

“It wasn’t me!” you cried as you dropped and kicked his legs out from under him.

Bucky rolled over quickly to pick himself up as you followed him swinging punches at his head and kicks to his stomach. Your moves were both erratic and efficient as they landed multiple times. It was all Bucky could do to block your assault and move out of the way.

“This isn’t me!” you cried again between punches. “Zemo is controlling me with nanotech!”

Bucky threw up an arm to block your punch before flipping you around by your arm and pressing you to the wall. He didn’t want to hurt you but he was pretty sure that it wasn’t the most comfortable position.

“It’s okay, Y/N. We’re going to get you out of this.”

Your foot kicked his leg and you pushed yourself over and around his head and away from the wall. Grabbing the knife at his hip as you slipped out of his grip, you threw it into his thigh.

Bucky looked at you in surprise and annoyance. “Sorry!” you winced. Pulling the knife from his leg he tossed it to the floor.

“Look, Y/N. I’m not going anywhere, but try not to kill me, okay?”

“It’s not like I’m doing this on purpose Bucky!” you huffed as you charged at him.

“Well I’m just trying to get you out of the problem you put yourself in!” You had grabbed another knife and went to stab him. Bucky caught the knife and twisted your hand but the knife snagged your dress and tore the skirt as you fought to wrestle it away.

Your eyes flared with anger and the next punch you threw had a little extra heft in it.

“That I put myself in? How about you, Mr. Barge-into-a-room-with-no-back-up!”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I thought you liked being saved! Although you’re one to talk! You came on a mission without backup!” Bucky rolled across the computer console out of the way of your next kick, getting agitated at your attitude.

“Because I needed space!” you yelled as you followed him around the computer desk.

“Space? Space from what?” Bucky yelled back, actually throwing a punch that you easily evaded.

“You! You idiot!” it burst out of you as you came up swinging before pushing him to the ground.

Bucky looked up at you with his eyes wide. You had him straddled under your legs. Bucky brought his arms up to block your punches while he tried to talk to you.

“Why would you need space from me? I don’t understand. You left without warning, without saying goodbye! Your mission was classified so I had to hack F.R.I.D.A.Y to even find out where you were!”

Your body was starting to fatigue from the strain of the fight as you continued to land blow after blow. You were fit and well trained but because your body was not your own you were blowing through energy rapidly. Your breaths were coming in short gasps as your chest heaved at each punch. If you kept this up, you weren’t sure how much time you would have before your body gave out entirely.

“Y/N, you left a huge gap! You were my best friend and then you were gone! You wouldn’t even talk to me before you left! You didn’t tell me you were leaving. I couldn’t even call you because the mission was supposed to be classified!”

Maybe it was the fatigue, maybe the hopelessness you felt, but you gave him everything you had left as you pummeled into him. Frustration over your situation, frustration at him, frustration at yourself built up inside you.

“I WILL NOT BE YOUR STAND IN! I will not be second best. I can’t look on anymore as you find someone smaller, cuter, littler to fit perfectly into your life! I deserve to be wanted! I deserve to be desired!” you screamed at the man beneath you as tears streamed down your cheeks.

Bucky finally bucked his hips and flipped you under him, pinning your hands to the ground next to your head.

“Get off of me! Let me go!” you had finally had enough. The damn had broken and your emotions and insecurities raged inside you. Your body pulled and twisted to break free from his grip.

“You do deserve to be desired,” Bucky said calmly as he caged you beneath him. “You are nobody's stand in. You’re perfect just as you are.” He wanted to say more but it was all he could do to keep you pinned under him.

The team burst down into the control room to see you openly weeping and Bucky on top of you.

“Nat, I need you to put an electric burst in my arm.” Bucky said looking up.

“I’m sorry, you what?” asked Nat.

“Just do it!” he said as you fought harder against him.

With a nod from Steve, Nat waved her baton and zapped Bucky’s arm causing both of you to scream in pain. When your body finally stopped seizing, the lack of adrenaline and the pain and fatigue caught up to you and you passed out in Bucky’s arms.

“You want to explain why I just pushed fifty thousand volts through you two?”

“Zemo infected her with some kind of nano tech. She hasn’t been in control this entire time.”

Steve scanned around the room. “Alright team, fan out. See if you can find out where Zemo went. I want teams down here with sat links up in 30 minutes.”

Bucky circled the gears around in his arm to get it up and running again before scooping you carefully off the ground.

“Buck, get her on the next jet out. Dr. Cho and Banner will be waiting for you to get back.”

…

For the second time you woke up in an unfamiliar place, and struggled to get your bearings. You felt like you’d been run over by a pick up truck and tumbled through a dryer.

Feeling slowly returned to your hands as your eyes opened and your vision cleared. You were in one of the medical rooms at the compound you realized.

“Look who decided to wake up,” said a gruff voice.

Turning your head you saw Bucky sitting in the chair beside you. He looked fresh and his eyes twinkled at you.

“Bucky,” you croaked as you tried to sit up.

“Woah there. You just relax. Your body is still trying to catch up from Zemo’s nanites.”

You slumped back down in the bed as Bucky leaned forward to take your hand.

“You had me worried there for a minute, doll. You’ve been sleeping for days. Wasn’t sure when you were going to pull through.”

“You doubt me, Barnes?”

“Not for a second, sweetheart, but I sure as hell missed you.” Bucky smiled, then looked down for a moment as if trying to find the right words. “We need to talk about why you left, Y/N.”

“No, Bucky, I...it doesn’t matter.” You say looking away. “It’s not important.”

“I don’t know, I’d say you thinking you don’t matter to me is pretty important.” You turned to look at him sharply, mouth open in a small gasp. “And I’d also say that you thinking I don’t find you desirable is pretty important too.”

You sat in shock as he spoke, not wanting to break the way you had during your fight.

“Y/N, you are perfect. You knew me before I even knew myself. You light up the whole room just by being in it. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. You are strong, independent, kind, and gentle. You’re like a tall Asgardian goddess. Every inch of you is beautiful. I thought back to the last time we talked...before you left, and I realized why you did. I know why you thought I wasn’t attracted to you. That night, Sam’s list,” he paused as if pained at the memory, “I didn’t add you because...well, because I was so confused at how I was feeling. You were my friend. I didn’t realize till it was too late that I was already falling in love with you. And I most definitely didn’t want to give Sam anymore ammunition.”

You looked up at him sharply when he dropped the L word.

Bucky stood to reposition himself on the edge of your bed. Taking your face in his hands he leans forward until your foreheads barely touch. “I didn’t want to ruin things with you. You were my friend. You were perfect and I thought you deserved better so I ran to find something that was everything you weren’t. You are my perfect fit. You are just right. You are the only person I want. Please tell me you’re mine. Please tell me I haven’t lost you.”

You brought your hand up to rest over his as you let his words wash over you.

He wanted you. He thought you were beautiful. All of you. All of the parts people had told you were too much: your height, your attitude, your independence - he wanted it all.

You did something that you wanted to do for months, you brought your lips up to his softly and gave him a chaste kiss. “I was always yours Bucky,” You pulled his hands down and pushed him away to look into his eyes, “but I won’t be taken for granted anymore. I shouldn’t have to leave for you to want me. I shouldn’t have to be gone for you to realize what you had. I left for a reason. It was to find peace with myself. I realized that I didn’t need your approval. I didn’t need your desire to be whole. I won’t settle for someone who can’t see what’s right in front of them. I know my worth.”

Bucky looked at you sorrowfully as he held onto your fingers, memorizing their shape. “I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to make you feel like you weren’t enough.”

“I know, but it happened. I don’t need you to be happy, Bucky...” Bucky hung his head in dejection. “...But I do want you.”

Bucky looked up at you sharply to find your eyes full of love and warmth. You wanted him. Even after all that happened - how he forced you away, how he made you feel like you weren’t good enough, you were still willing to forgive him. You wanted him even with all his faults.

You brought him closer for another kiss and savored the way his lips fell across yours. Breaking away to look up at him you said what you had been holding in for months, “And I love you too.”

Tags: @princessmisery666 @dreamwritesimagines

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky fic #avenger reader #angst #tall girl problems

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maizumis · 3 years

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— THEY CAUGHT YOU WITH WITH A POSITIVE PREGNANCY TEST

ft. timeskip! bokuto koutaro, osamu miya, tsukkishima kei, iwaizumi hajime, kuroo tetsuro

note: reposting this cause Tumblr messed up, baby fever is hitting

•BOKUTO was opening the door and his heart was already telling him something wasn't okay, his feet carried him to the living room in hope to find you "babe! where are you?" he is home, you think before answering with little sobs "i-in the bathroom, bo" why were you crying? did something happened to you when he was out? "what's going on? you're okay bub? why didn't you call me— what's on your hand" he spotted it so fast, you knew he wouldn't leave you but it was still a scary moment "um bo, do you remember how we talked about our future kids in high school?" he smiles at the memory, of course, he wants all the babies you could give him "of course I remember! we talked about how morning would be, a little baby in my arms while you were making some pancakes and stuff like that!" a sigh you didn't knew you had inside came out of your body "well, I'm pregnant, you could expect that scenario in a few months" he starts laughing, smiling, happy tears already down his cheeks repeating 'thank you' and 'i love you' as a mantra "now, we are really going to be the best parents out there" he hides his face in your neck and you can feel his smile "of course we are, specially you, I love you"

•OSAMU found you in your shared bed, in a fetal position hugging your knees, he thought you were sleeping but you were actually think how you were going to tell him the news, kids was never a topic the two of you talked about "how's ma pretty baby? ya getting some sleep?" by the way you looked at him in the eyes, he knew you weren't trying to sleep, he went to your night table to fin that cost little pillow with seeds and lavender that you loved so much but he instead founded a pregnancy test, your pregnancy test "babe would ya care to explain? I'm not mad at ya and I'm not leaving ya, never" you sit up, your back now resting in the wall and looking directly at him "surprise?" he sits next to you and brings you up to him, both your legs straddling his lap, forehead touching each other's "a know we never talked about a family together but I assure ya, a can't wait to meet ma little baby, yer going to be a beautiful mama, a love ya" happiness flowed your body, big smile and giggles falling out of you "and you're going to be a beautiful papa osamu, I love you"

• IWAIZUMI thought you were in the bathroom throwing up again we he didn't wake up next to you, blaming himself for not waking up to help you in there, what he didn't expected was your back on the bathroom counter, hand over your mouth to muffle your sobs "no, no, no baby don't cry, how can I help you? please tell me, you are worrying me baby, please" looking at him with red puffy eyes, cheek tear stained you told him "please promise me you're not gonna leave me hajime, I love you, I couldn't afford a life with you" now he was really worried, he started looking everywhere for something and then I saw it, his bran making the click, his heart now full of love, finally he's going to start a family with you "I'm not leaving you nor my child, I live both of you, can't wait to see what life is going to be with a little you running around" giggling you wipe your tears of your face, now you were crying of happiness "I really hope they have your eye hajime", he picks you up and takes you back to bed, cuddling you from behind, hand rubbing your inexistent pregnancy belly "now go to sleep again, you better not push yourself with anything, if you need something you call me, anything, you pick the phone and I'm gonna be there" smiling, you start to fall asleep in his tight embrace "love you hajime, imma go sleep" you did notice the little kiss he landed on your neck and the 'i love you both' that came out from his lips

•TSUKKI opens the door of your shared appartment after a long day at the museum, a little smile on his face thanks to the curious kid that was in his excursion, to scared to ask you about that life, afraid that you might leave; he is greeted with your figure sitting in the dinner table, both your arms up there while you rest your chin ok your fingers, eyes full of surprise seeing something he couldn't tell what is it. his tall body made your ways towards you and there's where he saw it, his expresion the same as yours "oh" disappointed of himself, he is literally going to have a kid and all he can say to you is 'oh'? "no shit sherlock, say something else!!! I'm about to pass out kei!" he is now laughing, happy, making you stand up so he can hold you by your waist "are you happy? do you want this, baby?" you pull him closer by wrapping your arms around his body "I do want it, do you?" he smiles, excited for how things are going to turn out "I want it more than anything in this lifetime, I love you" replying with a 'i love you more' the two of you stay like that in silence, enjoying the little moment, thinking how in a few months the two of you could share a moment like this, with your child

•KUROO was home early than usual, quickly hiding the yes behind you, both of you talked about having kidding the future, so of course this wasn't planned "h-hi testsuro, you're home early" he looks at you, already knowing something is off "your hiding something, spill it" you scoff, your acting skills where that bad? "I'm not hiding anything, how could you think that of me" his big body now is on front of yours, kneeling s little so his face could be as the same level as yours "show me, now" you give up, thinking is now or never and gave him the test "what's this?" he says while grabbing it "I thought you were smarter, now my child is gonna be dumb" he scoffed, eyes tearing a little beacuse of happiness, this wasn't planned a all but he couldn't feel more proud, throwing the test to the floor he picks you up and start kissing all over your face, whit a last kiss on your lips, he tells you "now we are really in that milf and dilf game baby"

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reaction2whatever · 2 years

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Agents of SHIELD S4E05-S4E07 reaction

It's been a few days so I don't really remember much what was happening lol so I watched episode 4 again

Had to say regardless of everything, FitzSimmons looking to move in together is cute. Also that conversation between May and Aida is hilarious to watch

Agents of SHIELD S4E05

-It actually makes sense that Simmons would be mad at Fitz lol

-I feel like Fitz shouldn't have kept the Aida project hidden because it clearly will go wrong......

-just last episode FitzSimmons were moving in together and it was so sweet and now they are fighting again I feel sad

-Daisy's power is kinda inconsistent tbh. in season 2 she can create a whole avalanche and now she can be crippled for life by her own power which just... doesn't make a whole lot of sense

-I can hear May say "stop whining" a hundred times and I wouldn't be bored because that's very hot for some reason

-Have to admit the Ghost Rider is handsome when he was ghostbusting

-Ughh this anti-inhuman woman senator is sooo annoying I cannot

-The new director really is a representation of politicians lol the way he changes Simmons' words is so hilarious to watch. That's basically this show's way of throwing dirt at the politicians and I'm not even mad at the new director

-This fight in the prison cafeteria is so epic omg

-It's possibly my favorite fight after that fight where Skye went to save Lincoln in season 2

-Daisy is so hot omfg

-I didn't see this coming. This new director is inhuman?

-Did I hear that right, May saw Coulson after she's dead?? Is this the season where I finally get the May+Coulson romance because I'd buy it

-Man I love that May and Coulson are Daisy's mom and dad figure and they came back for her

-I love this talk between May and Daisy

-Finally, someone talked to her and idk tell her that Lincoln wouldn't want her to kill herself

-I still miss Lincoln

-My poor child is in so much pain imma cry

Agents of SHIELD S4E06

-I don't trust this new director and his new assignment for Jemma

-Waited for six episodes and Coulson is finally standing up against this new director

-FINALLY

-It's about time

-So Robbie inherited the Ghost rider? Can he pass it on to another person? the Ghost rider is another concious thingy living inside of him?

-I mean that's interesting setting and all but what is this show with "I'm dead" "I'm alive again" thing. It happened to Coulson and then May and now Robbie

-Does this director do anything other than being in the way??

-The way the Ghost rider breaks out of the containment module was super impressive

-I thought this new director was an inhuman? what's his power though? He seems kinda useless just getting beat up by Ghost rider

-At least Daisy put up a fight against him

-It's good to see Daisy hack again and finally rest her wounds

-Okay so I'm not that surprised or rather I don't care that much that Eli was the evil boss, but I am curious about what's about to happen next and why he can create matter because there has to be an explanation, right?

-Also what happened to Fitz and Coulson?

-And where is Jemma?

Agents of SHIELD S4E07

-Oh no I don't buy it at all, Coulson and Fitz can't be dead

-ahhhh I seee. Fitz and Coulson and Robbie are turned into ghosts

-It is handy though, that they managed to listen in on the director and Coulson get to listen in on May lol

-Nobody was allowed to read the Darkhold but somehow Radcliff was allowed to read it? Just because he is a scientist?

-I've missed seeing Daisy in a fight scene

-If Robbie dies, and Mack becomes the new Ghost Rider, then that will certainly make Mack a more interesting character lol

-Who is this dude Simmons is helping that's so secretive?

-Robbie basically built his car and Fitz basically built Aida. I guess that's why Robbie can influence the car and why Fitz can influence Aida

-yeahh...I've been wondering how Aida could go wrong because it so clearly was gonna go wrong. seems like letting her read the book is the thing that will make it go wrong

-Because even though Aida saved Coulson and Fitz I wonder what Aida will become after all this

- it feels like it's gonna be the cliche troop of "robots are the threat" I wonder where this is going

-The way Robbie puuled himself through the portal was pretty badass lol

-I feel like there is a genuine friendship between Robbie and Daisy and I'm here for it

-Not romance though, because Daisy just lost Lincoln and it's too soon.

#agents of shield #agents of s.h.i.e.l.d.#daisy johnson

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rebelwrites · 3 years

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Imma Take Care Of Your Body (NSFW)

Clay Spenser x Reader

A/N THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN REBEL IS IN A THIRSTY AS FUCK MOOD!!! Also this took me THE WHOLE FUCKING DAY to write please show it some love.

Warnings: PURE AND UTTER FILTH! Was gonna put warnings on this but there’s too much to list 😂

Join The Group Chat Here - If You Want Tagging Manually Let Me Know 🖤

Clay Spenser Masterlist

This Months Writing

Being one of the few females on deployment had its advantages, the main one being, you got a hooch to yourself. You didn’t have to bunk with the rest of Bravo. The one major downside was you couldn’t always fill that need on your own, and the rest of the team had no idea of your little arrangement with a certain blondie, well that’s what you thought anyway. You had a itch that was in desperate need of scratching but you had no idea when you and Clay could sneak off to have some fun of your own.

Walking out of your hooch, the warm breeze tickled your skin, it was the first night of deployment so everyone was chilling around the fire pit, beers on hand. Looking around you saw that every seat was taken, and you didn’t fancy sitting on the floor, the sand was a bitch to clean out.

“That’s it guys,” you laughed grabbing a beer from the cooler. “Take all the seats, it’s fine, I didn’t want to sit down anyway!”

“Why you always gotta be dramatic Y/L/N?” Sonny laughed.

“Urm because dramatic is my middle name, Sunshine.” You laughed, hitting round the back of his head. Before moving round the group, standing the stop between Clay and Trent.

“I got the perfect seat for you baby,” Clay said lowly so only you could hear, as he glanced down at his lap, his hand position perfectly, near his crotch. “You know this seat is always free for you.”

“Is that right Blondie?” You whispered as Clay pulled you down onto this lap, this wasn’t out of the ordinary for the two of you, so no one mentioned it.

It was like Clay knew what you were feeling, as he didn’t stop bouncing his leg, it also meant he was in a teasing mood.

“Quit wiggling would ya!” you laughed.

“Why, is it getting to you baby?” He hummed against your ear, his hot breath tickling your skin and you could feel his semi pressing right against the spot you needed him the most.

“Clay,” You said, meaning for it to come out at a warning but instead it came out breathless.

“What’s up babygirl?” He hummed, gently grazing his teeth against your skin.

“You know what, Spenser.” You said as you took a deep breath, trying not to show just how turned on you were right now, it was like a game to Clay. He always tried to tease you in front of everyone.

“Don’t know what you are on about, Princess.” He whispered as he moved his free hand to your thigh. “But you can’t hide how turned on you are , you know I know every inch of this body, and just how it reacts to my touch.”

You couldn’t help but bite your lip as his hand ran up and down your thigh.

“You know Imma take care of this body,” he whispered, “kiss every inch of this soft skin, teasing you, slowly running my fingers over your clit, before pushing my fingers inside of you.”

“Clay, please stop,” you breathed as you squeezed your thighs together.

“Princess, you know I never stop,” he laughed, as he slowly pressed his hard on against your core “I’m going to watch as you squirm in pleasure from just the feeling of my fingers, moaning my name, making you feel like no one else can.”

“Mmm,” you hummed, as you let your eyes flutter closed.

“I wanna feel your body pressed against mine, listen to you moan as I slowly push my hard cock in you, giving you what you really want.” He breathed.

“Oh god,” you mumbled, as he pressed up against you again.

“But you won’t get any of it baby, not until I hear you say it.” he whispered, gently biting your ear lobe.

“Fuck” you breathed. “I need you Clay, so fucking bad”

“That’s a good girl.” he smirked, kissing your forehead. “Who am I to deny you of what you need, let’s go”

You didn’t need to think twice, as you stood up without saying anything to anyone. You headed back to your hooch, with Clay following close behind you.

The moment you were behind closed doors, he pinned you against the wall, his lips crashing down on yours as he pressed his body against yours. You couldn’t lie you were addicted to him, the way he made you feel was like nothing you had ever felt before.

“Fuck, you don’t know how bad I want you right now” he breathed against your lips, as his fingers fumbled with the button on your trousers.

“I’m all yours to take,” you whimpered, leaning into his touch.

“You just know the right things to say to me,” he growled as he pushed your trousers down your legs, pulling your shirt over your head, leaving you standing there in just your underwear, his eyes roaming your body before pushing you down onto the bed. “Damn you are so fucking perfect” he hummed as he pulled his shirt over his head, tossing it on the floor.

“Clay, please,” you whimpered, making him smirk “I need you so bad”

“Patience babygirl,” he smirked as he dropped his jeans and boxers, making your mouth water at the sight that was in front of you. “I told you how things are going to go!”

“Yeah well, change of plan,” you giggled, as you crawled over to him, leaning back on your heels as you kissed his thick thighs, his breathing getting heavier as you got closer to his dick. “You always focus on me, it’s time I returned the favour” without any warning you ran your tongue along the underside of his shaft, feeling the veins against your tongue, slowly making your way to the head as his fingers knotted themselves into your hair, throwing his head back as you sucked slightly harder before taking him all on your mouth. It took a couple of attempts and some gagging, due to him being big and thick, but you weren’t giving up until you had all only him in your mouth.

“Fuck,” Clay grunted, as his grip on your hair tightened, “You and that pretty little mouth of yours will get you into so much trouble one day babygirl.”

Looking up at him through your lashes, as you continued to make him feel as good as he makes you feel, his heavy breathing and grunts, spurred you on, feeling his dick twitch in your mouth. Before he pulled your hair, pulling you off him.

“Playtime is over, Princess,” he growled, as he managed to unclasp your bra with one hand, before pushing you down on the bed. His lips connecting with your neck, gently sucking and nipping at your skin, sending sparks through your body, Clay knew your body like the back of hand, so he knew just what buttons to press.

He slowly and agonisingly, moved down your body, placing hot, open mouthed kisses across your skin, he was in this for the long game and you knew after you would be exhausted, but it was so worth it.

“Clay, please stop teasing.” You cried as he slowly ran his fingers through your wet folds, smirking when he realised just how much he was effecting you. Without warning he pushed two fingers inside of you, making you cry in pleasure, arching your back as he curled his fingers finding your g spot. “Oh god,” you moaned.

“God I love hearing you moan my name,” he hummed against your throbbing clit, the feeling of his breath adding to everything you were feeling, the moment his tongue found your clit made you scream out, tangling your fingers in his hair, your whole body felt like it was on fire and was about to explode any moment, Clay also knew this as you felt him smirk before stopping everything he was doing, making you whine in annoyance, you were so fucking close. “I’m in charge, Princess, you remember that. And you cum when I allow it.”

Feeling him slowly pull his fingers out, you whimpered from the loss of feeling of him, but it wasn’t long before his fingers were at your mouth, without thinking you took his fingers in your mouth, sucking them clean, tasting yourself on him only made you hornier. You didn’t know what it was but Clay always managed to bring the inner slut out of you, doing things you’d never do with anyone else.

“That’s my good girl,” Clay breathed, as you looked up at him through your lashes. “Now where is it? And don’t bother trying to tell me you didn’t bring it because I know you did,” he laughed as he looked around the room. “I know you just can’t live without my cock baby.”

“Backpack,” you breathed, as he took his fingers from your mouth. The anticipation of what was coming was driving you crazy, the item in question was originally meant as a gag gift but now it was something you couldn’t live without.

“Got ya.” Clay grinned as he pulled the black box out, pulling the vibrator out, but this wasn’t your standard vibrator, this was molded from his own cock. “See I knew this gift would be the best thing ever.”

“Baby please,” you moaned as he turned the vibrator onto the fastest setting, holding it against your clit, making your squirm. “I just need you,” you breathed “need you so fucking bad.”

“Patience Princess,” he laughed, watching your breathing get heavier, grasping at the sheets as he kept the toy pressed against you. “Tell me babygirl, how often to you fuck yourself with this, wishing it was the real thing?”

“All the goddamn time,” you cried, bucking your hips against the toy, trying to get some sort of release. “Please Clay,” you whimpered “please just fuck me.”

“Well seen as you asked so nicely,” he grinned as he positioned himself against you, reaching up grabbing a spare pillow to put under your ass, both of your moans filled the room as he finally pushed his solid cock in you.

“Oh fuck,” you cried as you clawed at his arms, the feeling of his hard thrusts and the toy still pressed against you clit sent your body into a frenzy, your legs were shaking and your eyes were rolling back in pleasure. “Oh god, Clay.”

“Fuck baby,” Clay grunted as his grip on your hips got tighter. “Don’t you dare cum yet Princess, not yet.”

“I’m so close,” you cried.

“Soon babygirl, soon,” he moaned as he felt you tighten around his cock. “Fuck you are so tight.”

“Fuck, please, shit,” you cried, the pleasure was just too much for you, the overstimulation and his long hard thrusts were too much, and you couldn’t hold back any longer. Digging your fingers into his arms, you cried out, you didn’t care that the walls were thin and the whole base could probably hear you screaming Clay’s name as the most intense orgasm washed over you, your whole body was shaking as Clay continued to thrust, his grip on your hips getting tighter, and would definitely leave marks but you didn’t care right now, all that mattered was the connection you had with Clay.

Opening your eyes, you bit your lip as you got lost in his blue eyes, your heart was pounding against your chest, your breathing was heavy and it felt like you were floating as you road out your high as Clay found his own climax, his face screwing up, as he took his final thrust, moaning your name as he came.

The toy had now been turned off and tossed to the side, as he collapsed on top of you, taking his weight on his arms, resting his forehead against yours.

“Fuck baby,” he groaned, trying to catch his breath.

“Tell me about it,” you breathed, resting one hand on his cheek and the other in the centre of his chest. “Think that’s the hardest you have made me cum.”

“Won’t be the last either,” he smirked, pausing in thought for a second, as he pulled out. “I want more Y/N.”

“Damn boy, let me recover first.” You giggled as he helped clean you up before laying next to you, pulling you into his arms, resting your head on his chest.

“No, I’m fucking spent right now.” He laughed “What I mean is I want more, don’t get me wrong the sex is mind blowing, but I don’t just want us to be each other’s booty calls. I want to be able to call you my girl.”

“Good job I want the same then.” You whispered running your fingers over his chest.

He didn’t say anything, he didn’t need to, his kiss said everything that needed to be said. Yes the lust was still there, but it was full of passion and love and once again left you breathless.

“I guess we better go rejoin the group,” he whispered against your lips.

“Mmm, ten more minutes,” you whispered, “I don’t wanna leave our bubble just yet and face the real world.”

“I mean if they didn’t know something was going on between us, they sure do now. You really don’t know how to be quiet, do you Princess? Might have to gag you next time.”

“Is that a promise, Spenser?”

@chibsytelford @mrsmarvelous1995 @supervalcsi @talicat713 @disasterfandoms @bravo-four-seal-team @jasonbabymama @jayhalsteadfan-2417 @lotsoflovefromlea @seik-o @ohitshanksgirlxo @velvetcardiganbucky @phoenixhalliwell @pancakeisreading @itsonautopilot @pinkrockstar19 @galaxysanduniversesinmymind @softi92 @abby-splace @withmyteeth

#Clay Spenser #clay spenser x reader #clay spenser imagine #clay spenser oneshot #seal team #seal team x reader #seal team imagine #seal team oneshot #rebel was in a mood today

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anystalker707 · 3 years

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Spicy horror

Pairing: Frank x [fem] Reader Word count: ~ 4 000 Genre: Smut / Fluff Summary: It's Halloween, and (y/n) and Frank finally confess their crushes to each other when binge watching horror movies on Frank's place. Kind of content: Praising / Protected / Oral

Requested by @thisisjustforrequestingfanfics (can't tag you, sorry hhh my T*mblr is acting weird)

a/n - I'm sorry that I coudn't proofread, I might do it soon; I was supposed to be asleep rn

"You're just annoying, old man," I tease with a grin. "But don't whine or else you'll ruin the makeup!" I continue spreading the white concealer over his face, careful to get it on the corners around his nose and around his eye, though not to irritate his eyes.

"No, fuck you," Frank groans, his face twitching to suppress any expression. "Why can't we watch it again tonight? They're the best movies! And stop calling me old man, it's just my birthday! I'm not decomposing or anything!" Despite his words, he smiles, opening his eyes once I pull away, leaning back against the chair of the desk – I roll my eyes.

"Yeah, I agree." I grab the eyeshadow palette from the desk and move closer to him again. "TCM is a great series and all, but can we not watch it for a single week? It's your birthday and we can watch literally any horror movie! And it can be special, like, not something we've watched a thousand times already to the point we already know most of the lines." I glare before motioning for him to close his eyes.

Frank sighs grumpily, leaning his head back. "What are you planning on, then? Alien? Jaws?" He lets out a weird cry when I slap the side of his head lightly, though he is soon chuckling.

"And then you complain when I say how annoying you are!" I spread the dark eyeshadow over his eyes, humming. "It's been a while since we've watched The Howling, Evil Dead, House of Wax. I mean, 'm not gonna complain if we decide on Alien and Jaws either." He hums, pouting. "Don't worry, you're still my favorite old man." I press a kiss to his head.

"I hate you," he laughs.

After a little bit of fake blood and retouching on my makeup, the two of us are leaving Frank's house to go to school, waving his mother goodbye. We don't look like what most of the kids will go dressed up as – not putting enough effort nor choosing the same themes as the jocks and popular people and not invisible enough just to throw on whatever in a black theme. Frank looks like a chill vampire with Bela Lugosi's Dracula references, though still looking like a punk, while I decided on one of my favorite characters. Nothing too extra, but still in the vibe.

"You look ridiculous with that hair slicked back." I kick one of the pebbles on the sidewalk. "I prefer the hedgehog or whatever it is in the normal state."

"I honestly feel like I could kill someone just from biting their jugular off." He grins, throwing his nose in the air – I can't help but to chuckle; he's adorable. "But not gonna be anyone from school, they're not worth it neither their blood would taste good." He twists his mouth. "I feel like most I'd get would be booze, botox and steroids."

"Damn," I snort, "awfully accurate. You're gonna starve, sorry."

Frank pouts, looking down, but a smirk soon tugs on his lips as he takes a step closer. "But you're not that bad, baby, you know?"

"Oh, fuck off!" I roll my eyes, clicking my tongue. "You just want to get in my jugular!"

Both of us burst out in chuckles and our conversation eventually dies down when we walk past the gates to inside the school, replaced by jokes at other people's costumes, sometimes needing to hold onto each other from laughter.

We walk into the first class, already a bit late, but all it does is to attract everyone's attention the moment we step in.

"Ridiculous, as always," some girl mutters under her breath. Funny.

Frank wraps a hand around the length of the coat to stupidly bring it to cover the lower part of his face, looking around with narrowed eyes then wide ones. "I smell not just a lot of blood here," he says in a low and raspy voice, "but also stupidity!" He points at the girl judgingly, making her twist her mouth disgusted.

"I hope Freddy Krueger visits you tonight," I say when walking past her, patting her shoulder. A scream comes from her when noticing the fake blood stain I leave behind on her white outfit, having Frank and I chuckling on our way to the back.

No one really pays attention to the classes – it's Halloween, we're even in stupid clothes and anxious for whatever is going to happen later in the day, so the teacher doesn't even bother scolding Frank and I for talking nonstop in the back of the classroom. To be honest, I think only the goody two shoes are actually doing something, sometimes turning around to glare at the others.

"Okay, okay, shut up for a minute!" I tell Frank, taking a look at the messy words over my notebook to check if I forgot to write something down. "We've got The Howling, Alien, Evil Dead, House of Wax, Dawn of the Dead, Funhouse, Pumpkinhead..."

"Fright Night," Frank continues, "Opera, Cannibal Holocaust, Texas Chainsaw–"

"I said no TCM! Fuck you," I curse, rushing to write everything down, crossing out TCM when I accidentaly write it down.

"Friday the 13th, Poltergeist, Near Dark and Elm Street," he finishes, glaring at me. He hits my shoulder, not enough to hurt. "I'll make you watch TCM with me until you have memorized every single frame of it!"

"Your TCM phase will have died down by then!" I twist my mouth bitterly. "Sorry to kill the hype, baby!" I throw my nose in the air with a chuckle at his sulky manners. He furrows his eyebrows, sucking in a breath for words he never really gets to say. "And we still got to watch all these goth movies and shows lying around! Do you think it was easy finding the 60s Addams family show on DVD? Or that one Frankenstein version on cassette." Okay, the last one was easy to find in a yard sale, but still, it was just luck.

"Okay, mommy, please just don't punish me," Frank says with a groan and a fake moan. I stare at him as he's not able to contain his laughter before starting to hit him with the notebook.

"Too bad you're not a good boy, hun."

For once, school ends up actually being nice and just because Frank and I were getting in the character sometimes and pissing people off. By lunch, he had pulled on some sunglasses and looked like the stupidest fucker while eating his sandwich and smudging more of the lipstick and fake blood around his lips. At some point, we had pretended to have a fight and pierce the other's chest with a pair of scissors just to squeeze a bag of fake blood at whoever walked by – mostly some of the jocks or plastics. So much fun.

The house is quiet when we arrive back at it, a couple hours after school ended, and we find out, later, a note from Frank's mom apologizing she can't be here during the rest of his birthday, though she's sure he'll have fun with me.

"Imma take a shower," I sigh, pointing upstairs.

"Sure," he hums, looking up from the note for a moment to smile at me.

Thankfully, I always leave some clothes at Frank's place because I'm here far too often and not always have the chance or disposition to go back home and grab some clothes. It doesn't prevent me from stealing his hoodie, however, and walking out of the bathroom without all of that sticky makeup or fake blood is the best thing ever. Later, Frank is the one to go take a shower while I take care of the food he had already started to prepare.

"Much better!" I raise my eyebrows at the sight of Frank with his hair back to normal and only a bit of black makeup smudges the underside of his eyes now.

"Y'know, I never said a single thing about how you looked," he mutters with his brow low, coming to lean against the counter, next to me, "still, you've been attacking me every chance you got!"

"Does it offend you?" I smile.

"No, but it still hurts!" He sniffles, a hand flat against his chest. "I know I'm too badass for you to handle, but you don't need to let it be that clear!"

I look at him from head to foot. "I hate you, y'know that?"

"Love you too, hun!" He grins and moves closer, cupping my face exaggeratedly to peck my cheek before we head upstairs with everything we need.

We turn the lights on to organize everything, soon sitting down against a pile of pillows and with food surrounding us, though most of it is on the bedside tables since Frank, mainly, gets extremely uncomfortable with it falling on the bed. It doesn't matter, though, since the food and half empty cans end up going forgotten halfway through the movie at the same time the chatter dies down and we watch The Evil Dead as if it was the first time.

Some funny part comes on – well, not exactly funny, but enough to make us chuckle quietly – and brings us back to reality, sighing and glancing at each other, adjusting our postures as we'd slid down the pillows.

Frank yawns.

"Already tired?" I tease, poking his shoulder.

"No." He pouts, crossing his arms over his chest. "Getting tired is for losers." He does glance at the clock on his bedside table, however, and the red glowing numbers say it's six something.

"You're my favorite loser, then." I smirk lightly, exhaling.

Frank's eyebrows knit together as he looks at me, but then rolls his eyes. "Well, duh, of course I am! Who else? I'm the best." He scoots closer until his head is leaning on my shoulder and I can't help but to smile.

"No, I am," I groan, arms wrapped around him.

"I am!" He glares and, at some point, we end up in a wrestling match, pushing each other around the mattress among laughter and curses, which comes to a stop when we start getting too tired and I just let Frank lie down on top of me, head on my chest, still watching the movie. "Do you like anyone, (y/n)?" he asks suddenly. "Like, got a crush?"

Random. Why does he want to know? I mean, I do have a crush, but telling him about it is difficult.

"Um, yeah, I guess, why?" I blink, startled when he suddenly brings himself up on his elbows to stare at me.

"I swear to God I'll hunt them down if you forget about me because of them, do you understand?" Frank presses his forehead to mine. "You're the only one I got, sometimes I'm so worried you'll even leave me for whatever reason."

"What?" I breathe a chuckle, though there's not exactly anything funny here. "Never in my right mind would I do that! And you can't hunt my crush down if my crush is actually you," I laugh in a sudden rush of confidence, which wears out awfully quickly, leaving me lying there and rethinking every life choice.

"Me?" Frank widens his eyes. At the lack of answer, he takes a hold of my collar, straddling my hips. "Did I hear it right? Please, (y/n), (n/n), soulmate? I'm your goddamn crush? For how long?"

I shake my head lightly, shrugging. "Months? A long time."

"And you just told me now?" He cries, forehead pressed to my shoulder. "Slow motherfucker."

"I didn't want you to leave me either, c'mon!" I sigh in defeat, running a hand through his hair. "I remember that time a girl confessed to you and you'd simply vanish whenever she showed up. What if that was with me? I'd not be able to live like this, y'know that."

"Y'know, yeah, seeing it from that point..." Frank shrugs, bringing himself up to face me again. "Still, I wouldn't avoid you like that! Dunno, but it doesn't matter now because you just relieved me of months of suffering. Looking at these pretty lips without being able to kiss it." He furrows his eyebrows, eyes on my lips. "Can I kiss you, tho? Now that we feel stupid for all these months. Damn. At least I feel."

I breathe a chuckle. "Of course! Do you think I wasn't dying to do it either?"

Next thing I know are Frank's lips pressed against mine softly, soon growing firm with confidence. His fingers run along my neck lightly, in a caring manner, dropping to trace my collarbones.

"Also," Frank breathes, pulling away; his face never moves farther than a couple of inches whilst he adjusts his position, lying down beside me on the mattress. "Maybe it's wrong to say and I've always tried to say it in a subtle manner, but–" his eyes meet mine, "–you've got the body of a goddess! Like, dunno, sometimes you comment about not having an 'ideal', skinny body, but you're just so perfect," he groans, wrapping his arms around me tightly.

"Frank!" I tap on his back lightly. It's not that I don't like what he said – no, damn, it sends my heart fluttering, this warmth taking over my chest –, but is it really the truth? I didn't think it was possible for anyone to tell me this.

"No, I'm telling the truth!" Frank grins. "Like, your thighs and all. I just want to squeeze and bite you! Not in a bad way, I mean." I must give him a funny look because of how flustered he grows, tongue playing with his lip ring as he looks away. "There's a lot to unpack, fuck, I thought it was obvious how I always sit there gazing at you and shit, but..."

"Likewise." I glare playfully, making him chuckle.

"Y'know–" Frank smiles lazily, "–this is the best birthday I've ever had, by far." He brushes his lips against mine softly, watching me through half lidded eyes. "Never knew you'd actually like me back. Never believed it was possible, to be honest."

"I never cogitated you like me," I breathe.

"Well, okay," he says, "we've already gotten through this. I think we should focus on now."

"I'm not the one who keeps bringing back past thoughts!" I chuckle at how he pouts, scowling funnily.

"Shut up, shut up, I get it!" Frank rolls his eyes and presses his lips to mine before I can say anything, having me smiling against the kiss until returning it, wrapping my arms around his neck to pull him closer. Now that we've finally kissed, keeping our lips off each others' feels almost impossible – letting go of each other feels almost impossible. "God fucking damnit," he groans under his breathe, moving to press kisses down my jaw, soon reaching my neck.

A sigh escapes my lips at the kisses, though it turns into quiet pleased sounds at the feeling of his teeth pulling at my skin and sometimes closing around it, sucking on it whilst all I can bring myself to do is tugging onto his hair. Suddenly, however, feeling his hands traveling down to my hips and squeezing them makes me gasp, probably reacting a bit more than I intended.

"What?" Frank pulls away at the same moment, eyes wide. "Did I do something wrong? Please– Damn, I'm so sorry!"

"N-No, no," I finally bring myself into speaking up, feeling my cheeks burn bright red. "I, um, I actually... liked it. A lot. Sorry if I scared you, I just wasn't expecting it. I don't mind, really," I insist as he continues looking at me with furrowed eyebrows.

"You sure?"

"Yeah!" I smile, bringing him for a quick kiss before he's trailing down my neck again.

Frank's hands go down my body, experimentally at first and then squeezing my hips again, receiving another reaction this time, including just a soft gasp as I push my hips up – a shiver runs down my spine with it, a nice one. Fuck.

"Damn..." Frank breathes, hands running down to my thighs then up again to slide under my shirt. "It's a bit early, maybe–" he shrugs, looking at me, "–but... is it okay if..."

Holy hell. "Of course," I say without thinking much – he continues to stare, so I nod.

"Fuck yeah," he mutters, lips against mine for a few seconds before he's pulling my shirt over my head and the expression on his face carries such admiration that I can't help but to feel embarrassed for a moment. He never lets me cover myself, nonetheless, hands flying to my waist to hold firmly onto it as he's pressing kisses from my stomach to my hip. "No, seriously–" he sits up again, "–how can someone be so perfect?" He seems to be talking mostly to himself, getting rid of his shirt.

"Dunno." I grin. "How does it feel to be so perfect, baby?"

Frank exhales shakily. "You'll be the death of me and I ain't even joking." He presses a kiss to my collarbone, starting to nibble down at the skin again, trailing down to my chest, lips sometimes lingering over my breasts – sure as hell he leaves a few marks behind, considering how invested he gets.

Something tells me he doesn't know what to focus on. His hands never stay in the same place for too long, going down my thighs then trailing up to my waistband, up my torso, and then he repeats it.

"C'mon," I mutter, placing his hands on my waistband. He's a bit hesitant, but quickly undoes the buttons and starts pulling it down – I help him, kicking the pants away in the end.

A string of curses slip past Frank's lips as he quickly gets rid of his jeans too and, when coming back, he kneels down between my legs this time, spreading them apart. Our lips are yet again locked in a kiss, different from the others, more heated up and urgent this time as we hold onto each other. I play with the hair on the back of his neck and tug onto it instead at the feeling of his hands around my ass, groping.

"Frank, damn," I breathe quietly for a second we pull apart and, opposite to earlier, he gets the hint and does it again, humming against my lips. Once he stops groping, his hands just run along my skin, up and down my body, sometimes lingering. The most lovesick look decorates his face when he pulls away. My heart.

I place my hands on Frank's shoulders as I sit up, changing our positions. He observes me with wide eyes and I smile at him before pressing kisses to his neck, leaving behind a hickey before I can go lower and lower until my fingers are around the waistband of his boxers and I pause, looking up at him, and continue after he nods.

Frank's already half hard, a breath hitching in his throat as, after discarding his boxers, I assume my previous position.

Even if it's not the first time I've done that, this nervousness still lies under my skin as I wrap a hand around him, pumping him lightly before wrapping my lips around the head experimentally. He breathes sharply.

Only halfway through it that I allow myself to look up at Frank, pausing for a moment after finding out he's been watching, propped up on his elbows, eyes focused on me and jaw slack, but I don't look away, hollowing my cheeks instead and watching him break under my gaze, letting go of all the tension for a second.

I repeat the motions a few times and pull away, licking up along the underside, around the tip, and he's suddenly pulling me away – eyes wide and face flushed this time.

Frank mumbles something I can't quite understand, but it doesn't really matter. He moves closer, both of us soon assuming the position we were in minutes ago, pressed against each other. Now, he removes my underwear and his hand slips between us, however.

Pleasure is sent ringing up my spine at the feeling of Frank's fingers slipping past my lips, quickly finding my clit and wasting no time on working his thumb on it while a couple of fingers tease my entrance. Moans just escape my throat easily after he breaks the kiss, mouthing his way until the inside of one of my thighs – he bites and sucks on the skin there. His tongue is suddenly there, then, against my clit, working around it before being replaced by his lips and my vision goes fucking blank when I can feel him sucking on it.

"Fuck," Frank curses once pulling away, moving to frantically rummage through the nightstand's drawer; I groan at the loss of touch, pushing my hips up into nothing.

Hearing the sound of foil being torn makes me understand what's happening, and I watch him rush to slip the condom on, giving us a moment to catch our breath before he's positioning himself, a hand on my hip whilst another holds himself up.

"Tell me if there's something wrong, okay?" he asks slowly, "I'll stop right away. Don't be afraid."

"Same to you," I say softly, cupping his face to pull him for a soft, quick kiss.

Frank smiles with a nod and looks down before I can feel him against my entrance, pushing in slowly. I wrap my arms around his shoulders tightly, feeling his chest vibrate against mine with the low moan coming from him, replaced by a sigh once he sinks in completely. He starts moving right away, hips jerking experimentally before attaining a heavy and slow pace which doesn't last long due to how needy we are already.

I gasp at how he thrusts in harder, wrapping my arms around his shoulders to hold him close and having my legs around his hips, instinctively.

Curses and praises are breathed into my ear among moans, somehow making the pleasure pool down in my lower stomach even more intensely, summed up to feeling his hands groping on my ass again, fingers sinking into the skin.

"You're just so perfect, (y/n)," he babbles, "and even better that now you're all mine."

Suppressing a louder moan turns out to be impossible at the feeling of Frank's hips reaching a certain angle and, soon, the answer I had in my slips away from my grasp and all there's left is just how good he feels. I travel a hand up to his hair, remembering how he reacted to it earlier, and tug on it in a form of response, though also wanting to hear how pathetically he moans at it.

"'M gonna cum," I manage to say before being cut off by a moan, arching my back.

"Me too, babe," he groans, "almost there."

Frank pauses, adjusting himself so a hand is under my thigh and another on the mattress for major support and his thrusts are suddenly harsher. I throw my head back at the same time, holding onto him tightly, and it doesn't take long for all the pleasure that had been building up so far to unravel at once – it apparently triggers the same on him, considering how tight his grasp gets whilst a higher pitched moan comes from him.

Coming down from the high, I feel almost numb, in a good way. Frank pulls away and I'm only aware of him when he's lying down next to me, both of us breathing heavily and unable to do anything aside from staring at the ceiling for a long moment.

"Damn, I love you so much, so much," he mumbles again.

I breathe a chuckle, feeling him cuddling up to me, arms wrapped around me. "And I love you, dumbass." I press a kiss to his head.

"My girlfriend now, right?" he asks. "Nevermind, you don't get to choose." He chuckles, though it quickly dies down. "Just kidding, okay? Tell me to and I'll fuck off."

I laugh, still breathless. "Of course I am. I didn't confess for nothing."

#frank iero x reader #frank iero imagine #frank iero #mcr #mcr fanfic #mcr x reader #fanfic #fanfiction #x reader #female reader #n*fw #my post #my chemical romance #fluff #smut #imagine #oneshot #requested

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aphrodite-would-be-proud · 3 years

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I dont know if your accepting requests right now, but I love your kiddo headcannons. Could you do the Kiddo's reacting to Reiner asking you to marry him? I just really want to know who's going to get excited for the wedding, if any of the kids are going to be upset...your headcannons are just the best!!

Hey! Yes my requests are open, it's written in my bio tho i get it might be confusing. Imma make sure to also write it on the navigation post.

And by the name of persephone this the cutest most wholesome kiddo scenario! How did i not think of that? Just what realm of heaven are you living on Anon? Whatever it is thank you for blessing us with this thought💛

You're with Reiner, he wants to propose but his cousins overhear him.

{ Reiner x reader | tw:marriage tw:proposing tw:parental-neglect tw:heavy-angst | cartoony?, fluff, angst with comfort | modern }

{ The Lanterns, circa 1910 by Charles Courtney Curran 1861-1942 }

"And no opening the door to anyone no matter how sorry you feel for them, okay?" Colt said while adjusting the tie around his neck, making sure it's even as he takes one final look at himself in the mirror before putting on his coat.

"Okay" Falco replied, watching as his brother was getting frustrated with the too many buttons on his coat. "Do you need help?"

Nodding his head, Colt let Falco do his buttons while he reached for the cup of coffee he left on the table, quickly finishing it all. "And make sure to get to bed on time, no staying up reading comic books, you have school tomorrow."

"Don't worry I won't" Falco looked in concern at the empty coffee cup, "isn't this your third one today? I don't think you should be drinking this much..."

"You worry too much Falco, just take care of yourself okay?" Colt rubbed his brother's hair, before patting his head. "I'll text you to check on how you're doing so make sure to charge your phone."

And just like that, Colt wrapped a scarf around his neck, grabbed his keys, and left through the door. Leaving Falco standing there at the entrance, alone in the house.

Looking around the quiet room, Falco picked up the empty cup before washing it in the sink. Just as he was putting it away, the door bell rang.

'Did he forget something?' He thought, wondering if it's his the keys again. But looking at the table, he could see nothing was there.

Wait...Colt did take his keys before leaving, why would he be ringing the doorbell.

The ringing got more frequent, followed by aggressive knocking. Falco took a step back into the kitchen, thinking if he could dash upstairs to get his phone in time.

But he didn't want to trouble his brother...Think Falco think! What would captain america do in this scenario? But Reiner always told him he should think for himself...

And so he grabbed a knife, slowly inching towards the door but then he heard it, that fimilar sound.

"Falco? You in there? It's freezing open the door!"

"Gabi?!" Dropping the knife, Falco rushed to the door. Quickly unlocking it as a very cold looking Gabi stepped inside.

"What took you so long? I can't feel my fingers!" Rubbing her hands together to attempt to warm them up, Gabi glared at Falco.

"Sorry I thought you were a-" he looked away at the knife "uh..anyway let me get you a blanket" before he could rush up the stairs, Gabi pulled him back.

"No there's no time! We have to leave now." Holding his hand, Gabi dragged a very confused Falco out the door and they began making their way to the next destination.

Soon enough, the pair found themselves standing outside Udo's house, directly under his window.

"You still haven't told me why we're here." Falco watched as Gabi was looking for something on the ground, he stiffened when she smiled after picking up a small rock.

"I will tell you once Udo and Zofia are here, it's very important." She handed him the rock. "Now let's focus on getting Udo here, make sure to aim for his window because his mom is a really light sleeper."

"Wait if that's the case then why didn't we go to Zofia's house first? She lives right opposite of mine!" Falco whisper-shouted.

"Because! Neither of us can deal with a sleeping Zofia and you know that, only Udo knows how to wake her up." Gabi explained, crossing her arms while getting impatient. "So hurry up and throw the rock!"

Flaco looked at Udo's window, then at the rock. He looked at Gabi one last time before closing his eyes and throwing it, it made a sound as it hit the window....nothing happened

"Why am I the one throwing the rocks?" He looked anxiously at Udo's dark window, moving his weight from one leg to the other.

"I'm stronger. If i throw it, I'll break the window." Gabi was looking for another rock, having found one slightly bigger than the last. "Here try this one"

Having reunited again, the four of them were walking down the street to Reiner's house late at night. Gabi leading the group, Falco following her reluctantly, Udo keeping a still sleepy Zofia from walking into a wall while in her pajamas.

"This better be good Gabi, otherwise you can forget about copying my math homework for a month." The thought of just turning around and going back home to bed was still in the back of Zofia's mind.

Having almost reached Reiner's house, the four of them could see multiple cars parked outside of it, some of them they recognise.

"See! I told you all it'd be worth it. They're having a secret party without us! I heard Reiner talking about it on the phone with Zeke this morning when I was pretending to be asleep so I don't have to walk home." Gabi said as they sneaked to the side of the house.

"That's mister Zeke's car, miss Annie's and...even Porco's too.." Udo said as they climbed the house fence.

"They invited Porco but not us?" With that information, Zofia was fully awake.

"That's exactly what I've been telling you guys about! Here look!" Standing on her toes, Gabi looked through the window, between the curtains. Three heads joining her soon.

Looking inside, they could see the living room they were so fimilar with, looking really different. For once it wasn't a mess of pillows and candy wrappers! It was actually clean with various candles adding to the atmosphere.

Zeke and Pieck could be seen siting next to each other on the couch, drinking some wine while Colt is in the arm chair next to them with Porco pushing a drink in his hands.

Annie and Bertolt are leaning against the wall, she's holding a plate of donuts while he's talking about something.

Finally, you and Reiner are sitting on the couch opposite to Zeke and Pieck. His hand is around your shoulder and he keeps taking glances behind him at bertolt, while Zeke stares at him from the front.

If you focus, you can hear the muffled sound of music playing in the background.

The four kids watched as Reiner whispered something in your ear, before you noded, got up and headed towards the kitchen. The second you left, all of them crowded at the couch next to Reiner, Talking in hushed tones.

"What...are they doing?" Udo watched as Reiner took out a small red box from his pocket, hands shaking while the people around him leaned in to see what's inside as he opened it.

Quiet gasps and awws followed after as the ring inside came into view, glittering in the dark by the candlelight. Although that only seemed to fluster Reiner even more.

The four of them looked at each other with wide eyes, then back at the ring as Reiner reached out to hold it delicately in his hand for a few seconds as if he's offering it up to the air in front of him, the room got quiet, everyone holding their breaths.

"Oh " Falco said, "i...think i know what's going on." Both Udo and Zofia noded.

"What?" Gabi knitted her eyebrows, tilting her head, "what's going on?"

Before any of them could answer, Zofia told them to keep quiet when she noticed you walking back in the room, the ring back in the box inside Reiner's pocket.

Everyone was now standing, smiles on their faces, even Annie showing one of her rare ones. You were holding a new plate of donuts when you noticed them, with Reiner in the middle, nervous eyes staring right at yours.

Stepping towards you, Annie took the plate before going back to her spot. A few chuckles from Zeke, Bertolt and Pieck followed while Reiner shock his head.

Still outside, the kids saw Reiner start talking about something. Whatever it is, it must have been emotional because everyone in the room was listening with anticipation.

"I can't hear anything" unlocking the window, Gabi opened it just slighly. The muffled sound of music becoming clear as Reiner was finishing his speech.

"And you'd make me the happiest man in the world" he got on one knee, hand taking something out of his pocket. "If we could spend the rest of our lives together and I'll cherish every single moment you're by my side."

He opened the red box, holding the ring in front of you, eyes pleading. "Will you please marry me?"

The second you said yes, Reiner pulled you in the tightest most loving hug in your life, muttering "thank you"s under his breath. You could taste saltiness of his tears when he kissed your lips, still not letting go.

"He's crying" Udo said, feeling his own glasses getting a bit blurred.

"They're kissing." Falco's face was as red as a tomato, covering his blushing face with his hand but looking through his fingers.

"Annie finished all the donuts" was Zofia's comment with a pout.

Gabi's hold on the window got tighter, her lips quivering. "We have to stop them. They can't get married!" And like that, she slammed the window open before climbing inside.

"Gabi! Wait!" Falco tried grabbing her sleeve but was too slow, so he climbed after her into the room.

As expected from two children suddenly breaking in the room through the window, everyone's eyes were on them with surprised expressions.

Looking straight at Reiner, Gabi pulled you away from him before snatching the ring box from his hand. "NO! no one is marrying anyone" with all her might, she threw the box to Falco before telling him to run away.

Having been dragged into the middle of this, Falco looked at Colt's concerned expression, Reiner's confused face and Pieck's amused one. Stepping near Colt, he was about to give him the ring when he saw Gabi's face, making his stop midway.

"Run Falco! Just go!" She yelled, tears streaming down her face, legs shaking. "They can't leave us! Not like our parents did..."

Falco felt his chest tightening, recalling how empty the house feels with just him and Colt being away for work most of the time. How cold it is, unlike the warmth he feels whenever they stay over at your house.

He began tearing up too, holding the box so tightly to his chest.

It was Reiner who made the first move, while everyone was stunned looking at the two crying children. Pulling the both of them to his chest as they sobbed, he wrapped his arm safely around them. He looked at you and you followed in his steps.

After some time and explaining, Colt was comforting Falco while on the couch with Pieck doing the same on his other side. You had Zofia on your lap while she ate some Donuts you stashed away from Annie. Gabi was still clutching to Reiner with Udo on his other side doing the same.

Gabi would take a bite out of a donut, cry a bit then take another bite. Sometimes glancing at the red box on the table.

With time, reassuring words and Zeke making the kids laugh, things slowly got better. Reiner and you completely reassured them that you're never leaving, you love them more than anything in this world. That getting marriage is going to get you even more closer together than anything.

Hearing those words calmed Gabi down, each of them made you make a pinky promise to not replace them ever, same thing to Reiner.

That's when Bertolt brought up the fact you still haven't worn the ring, and it might make them feel better if they were the one to place it on your hand. And that seemed to grab their attention as they began arguing between themselves which one of them should do the honour.

{ The Lanterns, circa 1910 by Charles Courtney Curran 1861-1942 }

Headcanons

Strap in because boi are we in for a ride. These kids went through a lot even in a modern non-war world

They all have an altered negative view on marriage, especially Gabi and Falco.

Both of Falco's parents are deceased, he lives alone with Colt who's trying his hardest to work and take care of both of them, of course Zeke and Pieck help a lot too and try to be his stand in parents.

He knows about love and how good it is, he just thinks marriage would mean you and Reiner might also go away.

Gabi's parents are alive and well, they're just rarely in her life. She's an alone child with no siblings, so far Reiner has been her only relative that she counts as family.

Her parents often leave her at her aunt's house whenever they go on a trip away, or as she started getting older, alone in the house. It gave her a lot of freedom but also a misguided and neglectful life.

Reiner has been trying to fill both roles of her parents for her, and when you came along it was like a dream coming true, she suddenly has someone who truly cares for her being and loves her unconditionally.

So when she heard you were getting married, something in her snapped and fears about you both leaving her too just like her parents clouded her mind.

Udo and Zofia both have their moms only, they bond over it. In Udo's case it was after his father passed away in an accident that his mother became really overprotective and Borderline overbearing.

She's worried about everything, he feels like it's his fault somehow and can't help but copy her anxiety and paranoia.

When he heard about you getting married, he felt a sting of pain and guilt, like he's getting in the way and it never was his real family to begin with.

Zofia's mom is another case, her dad left them when she was younger without a word. Her mother lost trust in anyone after that and was emotionally unavailable.

She saw how hurt her mother was over her dad, she wanted to be strong for her mom and never have to depend on anyone.

So when she heard you were getting married, a sense of dread filled her at realising one of you will hurt the other somehow and she will have to be strong on her own again.

The four of them looked up to you both, were loved and cherished by you both like they've longed for so long.

They fear losing you, they fear losing the warmth, love and care you showed them.

So take it slow with them please, they've been hurt a lot. They don't mean to be ungrateful or rude they're just kids who are terrfied.

Be paitent and slowly introduce them to marriage in a new light, let them grief over their own parents in a healthy way while comforting them. Make them feel included in the planning and wedding and everything and I promise you they'll be fighting for the flower girl spot at the wedding if you just take it slow and gentle.

Yes even Falco and Udo want to be the flower girl.

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thewritingginger · 3 years

Text

Daddy au - Jean Kirstein

Imma say it, I love Daddy AUs and I'm not afraid to admit it!

So it’s 2am and I couldn’t help but write some and I’m really into AoT rn so I chose one of the boys that’s I believe would live to be a dad.

Please mind any possible mistakes :)

Fandom: Attack on Titan Warnings: Fluff, Modern au, Mentions of pregnancy

Enjoy ~

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Wants to be a Papa!

Biological, adopted = no difference

Loves the idea of watching his partner grow with his children

When you told him he honestly didn’t know how to respond - Excited! Scared! About to pass out!

“Really? Oh my god, I love you so much!”

“Whatever you need I got it!”

Just hugged and attacked you with kisses and cuddles

Will for sure 1000000% be talking to your belly, especially when you’re sleeping (gets a little embarrassed when you’re watching him)

Constantly touchin the bump!

Are you cooking dinner? He’s hugging you from behind cuppin the babe

Chilling on the couch? He is either wrapped around you w/ one arm on the back of the couch and the other holding your belly OR Laying on your lap in which he will pet, kiss and talk to your little one

For the nine months this child is cookin he will, more than usual, treat you like a goddess on earth bending to all your needs

Got a craving at 3am? Will gladly take his ass to the store for you.

“If you think of anything else you need while I’m out just give me a call, baby.”

“While I was there I also got those snacks you really like.”

Always goes to your appointments and listens very closely to what the doctor says

Can be a little bit of a worry wart at times

“Let me carry that, Baby! You are already carrying precious cargo.”

“You should sit down, we did a lot of walking today.”

“Do you need a pillow for your feet?”

Started crying the first time y’all heard the heartbeat, he just sat there looking glossy eyed at the ultrasound giving you kisses

When it came to the nursery he helped with the heavy lifting, painting and building of things but he let you decorate it to your liking

“Whatever color you choose will be perfect.”

“If you’re the one making it there is no way our child won't love it.”

Very involved with picking a name though

Okey come with me on this… if they had a boy - Jean Junior and they call him JJ 🥺

Sometimes the whole crew gets involved

“Eren, can you stop calling my unborn child ‘Horse-face Junior’!” “Yeah, you’re right! Good thing the kid has Y/n. If they’re lucky they’ll take after her.”

But honestly they are so excited

“I can’t believe one of us is going to be a parent.”

“Welp it was nice knowing you Jean-boy.” “He’s getting a kid not losing his life, Connie.”

Countless nights are spent talking about who they’ll be and what they’ll look like

You can even rope him into trying out old wives tales of guessing the gender

Doesn’t care what they come out as, as long as they are healthy

The night it was happening you reassured him that the contractions you were feeling were probably just more Braxton Hicks contractions and there is no need to worry before there is anything to worry about

But that didn’t stop him for being ready to strike at any moment

Tried to remain calm and collected for you, even though you were just chillin and taking each thing as it came

While timing them you noticed that they were in fact getting closer together and you may want to head to the hospital at some point in the night if it kept progressing

No matter how gently you inform him of this he snaps

Grabbing the hospital bag - that he made sure was packed months before and insisted on you checking you have everything again every few weeks - and throwing it in the car

Just grab him and throw him in a chair to relax for a beat as you get yourself ready to leave

On the way to the hospital he held your hand when you were contracting, trying to remember what he was taught in the birthing classes

At the hospital he would refuse to go to sleep, even when you and the nurse advised him to

“If you’re awake, I’m awake.”

Holding your hand and rubbing your back through contractions - babe really hates seeing you in pain

Constant stream line of praises and encouragement

“Just breathe, Sweetheart. Just like we learned.”

“I’m here, squeeze my hand if you have to.”

“This one should be over soon, hang in there.”

When it’s finally showtime he is ready

Mentally he is still a bit frazzled but his babies need him!

“You’re doing so good, Baby! Keep going!”

He watched that kid come out and he the minute he heard their cries he started tearing up as well

Once cleaned up the the nurse handed you your Baby Girl and Jean about died when he saw her

“You did so beautifully, Y/N. She’s perfect!”

TBH even though he was happy to welcome either a boy or girl he’d be lying if he said he wanted a boy cause it terrified him to have a little girl

Protective Daddy Mode Activated!

A few hours later while you’re resting in bed Jean would pick up his baby girl for the first time by himself

He could sit for hours just looking at her, taking in every little feature

“My life is yours. I will be sure to protect you from anything that comes your way!”

“I promise to be the best Papa in the world.”

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Ok I will stopped there before I keep going. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did writing it

If you want more let me know :3

💛 ~

#aot #attack on titan #aot jean #jean kirstein #jean kirschstein #jean kirsten x reader #jean kirschtein x reader #daddy jean #daddy AU #aot fluff #fluff

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thekillingjoke-haha · 3 years

Text

Love And Marriage

Spnquotebingo @spnquotebingo

Quote: You don't save a marriage by sleeping with other people.–Lucifer

Mostly Memory: slant/bold. Quote:small/bold

"What the hell, Anthony!" She yelled scaring both brunettes in the bed she shared with him. The women who looked half her age scrambled off the bed in a rush and ran out of the room getting dressed as she ran out the tower. This time she was throwing objects at the genius screaming and swearing every word under the sun. And yes this wasn't the first time, but its sure as hell will be the last. "How could you do this to me!? Time and time again I forgive and you do it again!!" She tried taking control of her emotions, but they over took her and laid everything out on the table.

Tony slipped on his clothes yelling back and forth with his wife. It was a screaming match that all of New York could hear. "Maybe if you weren't such a controlling bitch I wouldn't need to rush into the arms of a women that would get off my back!" He yelled back and she was stunned into silence. Tony continued talking. "Ever since we been together you've been trying to change who I am and I got sick of it, but you were America's golden girl I couldn't dump you. You just couldn't take the hint ,sweetheart." He finished his intoxicated words got the better of him, but drunk words were sober thoughts and maybe this is exactly how he felt after all these years.

"I want a divorce." She said her voice shaking not wanting to cry in front of the man she loved and she thought loved her back. "What?!" He turned on his heels and stared at her the shouting didn't sober him up, but those four words did. "What did you say?" He asked as if he didn't hear her. "I'm through, Tony. I'm tired of this back and forth. You said it yourself your not willing to change your partying playboy ways so I'm through." She said as she went to get her phone to call her brother. "I want a divorce." Those were the final words uttered to him before she stopped talking to him all together taking off the ring made from the metal of his original reactor the diamond glowing the same blue that lulled her to sleep. Y/n twirled the ring in-between her fingers a nervous habit after the years.

Steve got to the tower from his apartment along with Bucky and Sam. His two friends walked into her bedroom to hear Tony shouting and pleading for her to listen to him. Steve went to his sister as his friends pulled the thrashing man out of the room and to a different part of the building so he could cool off. Tony in the end didn't calm down and was getting violent to the point they had to knock him out and by then Y/n was getting packed with the help of Steve

The suitcase was harshly zipped up as she rushed closing it. Tears flowed freely down her face as she packed all her things well all the things she bought herself. She wasn't running, running was for cowards she was escaping before she drowned herself in whatever kind of love she once had with her husband. Y/n breathed in through her nose as her body convulsed with another fit of silent sobs. Trying to calm down she wanted to get think clear. Did she really want to leave? No, but he didn't give her much of a choice. The light tan line on her finger just further proved she wasn't turning back...not this time. Not even for him. Y/n needed time to think without the threat of the end of the world and out from under her now ex's crushing ego.

She was shacking with anger and in grief it happened again and she was done with it all. Tony fucking Stark her husband, lover, best friend cheated on her again for the third time that she knew of. Y/n saw it she was always there at the wrong time almost like he wanted her to see how pleased he was with another. Steve came out of the bathroom with more hygiene products. "How are you feeling? Are you okay?" He asked for what feels like the hundredth time. Steve knew Y/n wasn't okay he could see it and the sight made him want to rip Stark a new one. With a deep inhale she looked up at him with s slight smile as real as she could make it. "I'm okay I just need to get out of here. Fresh air. New scenery if possible." She said as she looked longingly at a picture on the nightstand not noticing that her brother left with her bags while she stared off. The picture was of her fifth date with Tony after being together as boyfriend and girlfriend for two years, a light festival their first openly public date for cameras to capture them together making it official. America's Sweetheart with a Playboy billionaire...that headline alone should have been the first of many red flags.

The memory played vividly in her mind. Her eyes shined like stars as she dragged him behind her. It was still light outside and the small park was crowded. "Come on, Tones!" She said excitedly as she dragged him along. Many people looked at them and whispered, but they didn't care. They spent the night talking about any and everything it felt so natural. Y/n stared into the sky on their picnic blanket having already painted her lantern with a good amount of wet paint still on her hands. "We've been on what feels like a million dates and this seems like the perfect one to ask you. Will you marry me?" Tony said holding a black velvet box with a f/c diamond ring. "I thought you'll never ask!" She pulled him into a kiss paint covering his cheeks as lanterns where released. He kissed back hands resting on her hips. "Let's go home Mrs.Stark-Rogers." Tony said with a smile. "Well come on then Mr.Rogers-Stark." He was once again dragged away. "No no no my name first Steve will not hold that over me!" Y/n giggled as the memory faded into a much older one.

The twelve year old girl was getting her hair brushed by her mother. "Mama what's love like. I know you love daddy so what's it like?" She asked it's been two years since her father died ,but her mother always said she stilled loves him. "Love is a amazing feeling that doesn't happen often and sometimes it can hurt." The blonde women said to her daughter she couldn't tell her wanting love cost more then giving it. "Why will it hurt?" The young h/c girl asked turning around. "You're to young to know right now, but at some point you will." By the time Y/n turned fifteen she learned that loving someone can hurt after she stood next to her brother and best friend looking at the slab of stone that marked their mother's grave.

The first time it happened she was pissed, but not at the right person at the time. The second red flag.. Screams are what filled the house as Y/n threw clothes at the tramp that was in bed with her drunk husband. She was so anger, but that just hid the pain she was feeling three years for him to cheat. After shutting the half clothes harlot out on the front porch of the Malibu home she stormed back to Tony. He stayed in his boxers on the bed looking dazed he was drunk. "Why?" Is all she could ask as tears fell down her cheeks. The billionaire stood up and walked toward her he wiped her tears. "I'll change. I promise." He kissed her head. She believed him she had faith that he couldn't change for them. After all Y/n did the same she gave up being a hero along side her brother because he told her he already worries about getting home to her as Ironman no need to add the stress of not knowing if she'll get home. So she hung up her red, white, and blue catsuit for him.

After a year Y/n sat in her art studio wear she sold her and other rising artist artwork after Tony said she shouldn't paint in the tower,she painted with her brother laughing messing with colors. She was thankful she put down plastic tarp beforehand a giggle rang out when Natasha walked through the door. Without saying anything she drops a magazine on the table of brushes next to Y/n. On the cover was Tony kissing some red head though a window tears welled in her eyes as she wiped her hands he eyes not leaving the cover till it was picked up off the table. Natasha comforted her as Steve took the magazine and paced. " Am I stupid for trusting him? Thinking he would change?" She asked as the waterworks flowed. "No ,if anyone is stupid its him. Ever since he came out as Ironman he thought he was untouchable. God imma kill him!" The red head said while Steve was flexing his hand not wanting to hit any of the stored art pieces. The third red flag for all to see.

The bus rocked back and forth as she looked over at her brother sleeping next to her. They were heading to the airport and he was going to see her off before possibly killing Tony. Speaking of she looked down at her phone and saw dozens of missed calls and hundreds of unread text. She felt that the world was so much bigger after leaving, after getting away from the place that no longer felt like a home. Turning back to the window a memory came to surface as a teenage girl sat on the bus watching old Brooklyn go by. She thought life was so slow she wanted to grow up faster and experience life. Y/n wanted to find love like her parents had. "What are you thinking about doll?" She turned and in Steve's place was Bucky her adoptive big brother. "Nothing important, James." She said with a sigh as the old modeled cares turned back to modern vehicles and yellow taxi's.

Tony woke up and ran around the tower while calling and texting his wife. "Friday track Y/n' s phone. He said as he went to the lab to get in his suit. "She's as NYC airline." The irish voice answered as he stepped into the suit letting it close around him. Before the hatch could open completely he was flying out of the tower to the airport. "Any idea which flight?" He asked wanting to get there before it's to late. "No boss, but the next flight leaving is heading for U.K and boarding in fifteen minutes." Time was running out he needed ever second he could spare. "We'll make it in ten." That night Ironman flew to save whatever he had left.

Y/n held her ticket in her shaking hands her breath uneven. Steve left after the bus dropped her off they said their goodbyes not making the separation hurt any less. Her thoughts came back to Tony all the good times made her smile, but the dark clouds took them over soon after. It felt so right to be in his arms thinking about the future they had with each other within seconds that became a distant memory. What's sad is she wants to go back wondering if she held on to those moments longer they'll last forever. The ring she slipped back on her finger weighed a ton. Y/n didn't have the strength to take it off not for good at least and this made her feel weak. Pain was heavy in her heart from the constant ache, but the little voice kept saying maybe if we tried harder he would have loved us the way we love him, maybe rushing into a relationship wasn't the best idea, maybe he's happier without us ,maybe not telling him about the positive test was the best option ,maybe...maybe.

A hand resting on her stomach she wanted to laugh, but that would have brought on a fresh wave of tears. She started off the day without Tony in bed and sicker then she's been since her pre-serum years. Y/n went to the doctor completely covered form any prying eyes and the test were clear she couldn't believe it she took about ten test in her studio bathroom before heading back to the tower. Howard warned her and Steve that the serum might sterilize them, but at the time both of them were to small and sickly and she knew getting pregnant might kill her anyways so they both agreed to it. Y/n wished she could hug the man today he made her better and let her have a gift she never thought was possible. A baby was growing inside her. Tony never really talked about kids and neither did she since that wasn't a possibility before, but the moment she held five of the clearer test she wanted to rush into his arms and have him be the first to know. That quickly fell apart that evening and now she's here.

The suit landed out side the airport and Tony immediately ran out of it into the building looking through his tented shades he followed the path Friday set for him rushing through security. "Now boarding flight A145 to United Kingdom. Ahora aborda—" The intercom rang out. He was running out of time. There he saw h/c hair one of a couple dozen in line due to the oddly timed flight. "Y/N!!" Many heads turned at the shout while so gasped and whispers started. She looked at him and froze. His eyes looked bloodshot and he wore baggy sweats and a AC/DC shirt. Turning back around she tried to get on the plane quicker, but a hand grabbed her arm. "Please listen to me. I'm so so sorry! I'm a fucking moron okay? I know I just keep screwing up between us and I know you're tired of me saying I'll change, but if it means I keep you in my life I'll do damn near anything." Tony's voice shook as his eyes welled with tears people crowed to see the Starks some seemed to clued in on the subject while others were lost. "You can't fix this Tony. There's nothing to fix between us you said your piece and actions speak louder then words there is no saving this." Y/n whimpered holding her hand in her own.

"I can save us, N/n! Please just give me a chance too. You and me against the world right?" She shook her head no as she looked into his brown eyes with her glassy e/c ones. "Wrong. You just don't get it do you? You don't save a marriage by sleeping with other people. And I gave you more then enough chances to change because God I changed so much for you!! I gave up saving people, gave up painting in the tower, stopped helping Pepper with business, stopped going to briefings, and so much more. All for you and you couldn't do one thing for me." With quivering hands she gently brushed the tears from his cheeks letting her hands go from his shoulders to his hands. "I loved you, Anthony. I always will have a special place in my heart for you, but clearly the same doesn't go for you." Y/n now held one of his hands bringing his knuckles to her lips giving them a chaste kiss.

She let go of his hand as she stepped back from him many of the passengers having already boarded the plane. "Don't say goodbye." He said voice small and weak. "...don't think of this as a goodbye. We just met at the wrong time in the wrong place. Maybe I'll come back to you and just maybe we can start again from the beginning, but until then this is a see you later." She turned and went on board as he stood their feet glued the the floor. Looking down at the hand she held the ring sat in his palm she left him with a piece of his heart while she took the rest with her. What is a marriage without love

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A/n this is the second to last one before the full masterlist is posted. Fyi I wrote a happy ending and if it's really wanted I'll make a short one-shot of it but angst ending for now.

Next quote is a free space and I'm going ham!!!!

#spnquotebingo #tony stark #tony stark x reader #cheating #quote bingo #pregnant!reader #divorce #angst #no happy ending #steve rogers #Rogers!reader #bucky barnes #natasha romanoff #heart break

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