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#i hope i am to you a friend but also an idiot who likes reading some documents but not all of them <33
vvelegrin · 6 months
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okay i am going to clean and i am going to go to the phone place and talk to them about a new plan and new phone and then also pick up a few basic groceries.
and also work on my UUUUH logh exchange fic that my brain put a significant pause on my awareness of until yesterday. it's fine, i know the general trajectory of it, just glad it came back to me when it did.
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My Everyday
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Pairing: College Athlete!Bucky x Reader
Summary: Bucky Barnes was aggressive, annoying, and—worst of all—a hockey player. Not your type. At all. But, unfortunately, your roommate. 
Word count: 5.5k
Warnings: Minor injury, idiots in love <3, some angst, pining
a/n: My first fic in a century!! Thank you so much for reading if you’re still here. Depending on how this does I hope I’ll have motivation to write more! College athlete Bucky never fails to get me inspired :)
Masterlist
~~
“What’s this punks name again?” 
The breath you let out was long and excruciating. “I am not repeating myself.” 
“C’mon, y/n,” Bucky whined, knocking his head back on the couch. He watched you bustle around the kitchen from his inverted vantage point. “How the hell am I supposed to swoop in and save the day if I don’t even know the kid’s name?” 
“Okay, well, first of all—” the fridge door clicked shut with a swift motion of your hips “—he’s not a ‘kid’. I’m pretty sure he’s a few months older than you.” 
“Semantics.” 
“And second of all,” you stressed, pointing a butter knife in his direction. “There will be no ‘swooping in’. I’m going to have a nice date and you are going to go hang out with your puck rabbits or whatever they're called. There will be no thinking about me and no swooping in my vicinity.” 
Bucky rolled his eyes, kicking up from the couch and rounding the kitchen counter to pick at your sandwich. You knocked his hand away several times, but you both knew it was futile. In the months you’d been living with the hockey player—who was far too big for the small, shoebox of an apartment you leased—you’d learned that food was non-negotiable for Bucky Barnes. 
There were many other things you’d learned about him as well. He sang in the shower, but only when he thought you weren’t home. He had an annoying penchant for using your $30 lotion—again, when he thought you weren’t home. And he loved to throw his massive, smelly gear just about anywhere it would land right when he got home from every practice. 
He didn’t really care if you were home for that last one. 
Bucky was the last person you thought you would be rooming with when you posted that ad last summer. A small, quaint room previously occupied by your now engaged (and traitorous) best friend, you assumed someone like-minded to yourself would have taken you up on your offer. The price point wasn’t egregious and the building was relatively close to campus. 
But weeks ticked by, and you started getting desperate. Your landlord wasn’t a nice lady, something you were positive she took pride in, and she decided that a rent increase was the perfect way to ring in the new school year. You were on the verge of destitution, and as it so happened, the only other person as desperate as you was the starting center for your college’s hockey team. 
You hardly got along. It had taken weeks for your eye to stop twitching every time he tumbled through the front door at three in the morning, and even longer for you not to feel an infuriating aggravation at his random, nighttime smoothies. You supposed he probably felt the same about your cleanliness rules and your incessant reminders about trash days. Because Bucky was in charge of bringing the trash down those long, apartment steps. Not you. 
But you’d be lying if you said things hadn’t gotten easier as of late. Conversation flowed more smoothly, things that made you seethe before were only mildly annoying, and Bucky was being… considerate? You weren’t quite sure what to call the random cups of coffee he brought home on occasion. Or his sudden urge to warm up your car when he had a morning class before yours. 
There was also the case of that party last weekend. A frat party with far too many drunk men and not enough common sense, you had had the urge to leave the second you got there. But Wanda had dragged you along for the sole purpose of driving her home after she got hammered, so you were essentially stuck. 
It was fine at first. Hot and crowded and loud, but fine. You kept a general eye on Wanda and scrolled aimlessly on your phone in the armchair you claimed. And then it wasn’t fine, because a man twice your size was encroaching on your space and unrelenting. 
“What kinda girl comes to a party and doesn’t even wanna talk to anyone?” 
“You want to come up to my room and watch a movie or something?” 
“Hey, I’m talking to you, bitch.” 
You weren’t even aware that Bucky had been at that party. It wasn’t surprising—the line between fraternities and sports was blurred at your college—but the space he took up as he intercepted the man in front of you was.
~~
“There a problem here?” Bucky posed, crossing his arms over his chest, his presence looming above your seated position. His weight shifted to his toes.
The man didn’t miss a beat. “Yeah, you. Move.” 
“Wanna fucking tell me what to do again?” 
“Fuck you, man.” 
A harsh shove to Bucky’s chest was all it took for a right hook to echo in the living room of the frat house. There was chaos. Grunts and screams from the drunk people surrounding the unnecessary fight created a cacophony of unpleasant sounds that seemed to get the attention of someone in charge. The man—Brian, you had now learned based on screams—was pulled back from Bucky and getting chewed out by some president or manager of something. 
And Bucky was seething, chest rising and falling laboriously as he wiped at the new bruise forming on his face.
Fights were not uncommon. But this one had been about you. For you.
“Bucky?” you asked when the crowd calmed and Brian was no longer in the room. 
You watched his back release its tight coil. He turned. “Are you okay?” 
The words were almost lost in the noise of the crowd, but he was close enough that they created a tactile vibration across your skin. His pupils were dilated and he looked so disheveled it would have been charming if there wasn’t also a cut forming on his brow. 
“Y/n.” 
It took you a moment to realize that you hadn’t answered him. Your response fell out of you as if you’d been shoved. “I’m—I’m fine.” 
He grunted, but it was more of a puff of air. “The fuck was that guy?” 
“I don’t know,” you replied, realizing by the way you swayed that you had stood up at some point. “He just—” 
“We’re going home.” 
“What? I can’t, I’m here with Wanda. I’m driving her, Bucky, I can’t just leave.” 
He grabbed your wrist, the grip achingly soft compared to the blows he was landing minutes before. “She left with that British guy she’s been on and off with. Asked me to tell you.” 
That explained his random appearance. Your brows pinched as you took in the information, eyes cast down to the angry red marks marring Bucky’s knuckles. He’d been in fights before. So many fights. On the ice. 
This was different. 
“I haven’t been drinking—I can drive myself home. You don’t have to leave,” you shouted over the music now bumping in the room. 
He didn’t respond, not verbally. He pulled you to his front instead, leading you through the impossible crowd until cool night air began melting into your skin. His silence was strange. Bucky’s favorite activity was talking your ear off until you told him to shut up, but right now… nothing. Even his earlier words had been clipped. 
You felt responsible for easing the tension in the air as Bucky continued to guide you to your car. You hadn’t told him where you parked, but he seemed to know the exact location anyways.
“You really don’t have to leave with me,” you mumbled. “It wasn’t a big deal or anything.” 
“It was a big deal.” 
~~
The drive home had been silent. The walk to the door had been as well. Bucky spent a few minutes appraising you in the overhead light of the living room when you got inside, but after that there was nothing. He went to his room and you went to yours. 
There was no discussion about it the morning after, either. Bucky apparently wanted to pretend nothing ever happened, so you respected that. Even now, you ignored the fading cuts on his hands as he shoveled food into his mouth.
Bucky’s next words were muffled by a mouthful of bread. “Well where’s this dude taking you at least?”
“Ice skating.”
The cough and sudden exasperation was very expected out of the man next to you, Bucky’s next words hardly containing syllables. “Huh?” 
“We’re going ice skating,” you reiterated. You picked up your lunch and headed for the living room, ignoring the slightly heaviness in your chest. “It’s winter and ice skating is festive. The rink on campus has decorations.” 
“Without me? Y/n, you’re gonna let some guy who probably doesn’t even know how to skate—” 
“Bucky—” you attempted to interrupt. 
“—drag you around the rink like a rag doll?” he continued, holding his hand up to mute your incoming speech. “I’ve asked you to come by the rink, like, a ton of times. You’ve never shown any interest.” 
You rolled your eyes and shot him a cross look as he picked your feet up from where they rested on the couch and dropped them into his lap. He went on with his rant for a little while longer, knocking his head back against cushions and accusing you of being a bad roommate. You had a few rebuttals of your own, but there was a reason you had never accompanied him to the rink. 
A good reason. 
You didn’t date athletes. 
It was true that simply going to visit Bucky at a practice, or letting him be the one to drag you around the ice like a rag doll, wouldn’t mean you were in a relationship by any means. But it would be an extra step. And if you were being honest with yourself, it would only take a few of those extra steps for the irritation you felt towards Bucky to melt into something else. 
And you didn’t date athletes. 
You did not. 
You didn’t have the time, nor the patience, to put up with the cheating, the anger issues, or the crazy schedules. And there wasn’t a single athlete you’d met at your sport-centered university that was willing to compromise on any of those subjects. Especially the cheating. You’d learned that the hard way after dating a lacrosse player for approximately one month before receiving the dreaded DM from a girl you had never met. 
The man hadn’t even given you the courtesy of pretending he didn’t know what she was talking about. He just admitted to his wrong-doing and shrugged. Shrugged. 
So athletes were not exactly in your good graces when it came to dating. 
“Are you even listening to me?” Bucky cut through your thoughts, patting your shin in impatience. 
You blinked and reoriented yourself, focusing on the hairs that fanned across Bucky’s face. “Of course I am,” you lied. “But my answer is still the same. I’m going on my date and you are not going on my date.” 
He groaned, apparently giving up as he cradled your legs closer to him to lean over and grab the remote from the coffee table. He flipped the channel to ESPN—typical—and you ate your sandwich, silently cursing him. He had a TV in his room. 
“When is it?” he suddenly asked, breaking the silence that had knitted itself into a comfortable blanket over the room. 
“Tonight,” you answered plainly. 
The arms atop your legs tensed. 
~~
The dichotomy of the man sitting beside you was impressive. On one hand, he was so full of himself that he had missed almost all of your conversation starters due to being so transfixed by his reflection in the rink’s glass. He had yet to ask you a single question about yourself and had insisted that the four other girls skating tonight were in love with him. 
On the other hand, he was, quite possibly, the most uninteresting person you had ever met. You were usually very quick to laugh, but every word out of his mouth was almost painful. He wouldn’t stop talking about his ex-girlfriend, gave you one word answers about anything other than baseball, and was honestly really terribly at ice skating. You were no pro either, but you found yourself on your back every time he tried holding your hand.
The tumble five minutes ago had you seeking out the penalty box on the side of the rink. You needed a break, you had told him, hoping he would continue on making a fool of himself and give you a moment alone. But he followed you instead, and was now sitting beside you, talking about baseball.
You supposed that was better than making you fall while talking about baseball.
“I bet we could do that,” he remarked, pointing out onto the ice and catching your attention. A couple who clearly had more experience than you was twirling each other around. “We definitely could. I pick up good speed.” You cringed. “I really don’t think we should try, Sean. My tailbone is already pretty bruised.” 
“Oh, c’mon! I won’t try the throwing part, just the twisty stuff.” 
“We are literally on rental skates. You will kill me,” you deadpanned. You were tired at this point and seriously questioning why you thought ice skating was a good first date idea. 
Well, there actually was an answer for that. But you were not going to think about the hockey player that popped into your head when Sean asked you on a date in the dining hall last week. 
Definitely not. 
“I’m not going to let my date think I’m boring,” Sean groaned, yanking you up from your seat. 
You gave a few tugs and words of resistance but they were ultimately useless. You figured it would be just as useless to tell the guy you already thought he was boring. He probably wouldn’t even hear you. 
On unsteady skates, Sean guided you to a mostly cleared corner of the rink and gripped your forearms. He squinted as he surveyed the area, the corner of his mouth turning up in a way that made your stomach roll. This entire date had been a bad idea.
“Maybe we should just watch them do it,” you tried, words wavering. 
“No!” he grinned. “No, we got this. It’s gonna look so cool.” 
And then you were spinning. You’d never been spun against your will before, but it sucked. Your skates kept getting stuck in the divots in the ice and the grip on your forearms was close to bruising. You were starting to get dizzy and Sean showed no signs of caring. God, he really was dragging you around the rink like a rag doll. Bucky was going to get a kick out of this.
“Okay, ready?” Sean called, an unwarranted jubilation in his tone. 
“What?” you yelled. 
He didn’t answer you. Instead, he let go, and you went flying in another direction without a clear path. It only lasted a moment, but the sound of your head smacking onto the ice signified the end of that movement. You landed on your arm next, and then your back. Again. 
This time felt different though. Your head was spinning and there were muted pinpricks trailing up to your wrist. The ache there was dulled compared to the biting iciness in your back, but as soon as you tried leaning on it to get up, it became sharp.
“Oh shit!” came Sean’s laughter-filled gasp. “My bad. I really didn’t mean to let go.” 
You blinked a few times to clear the blurriness from your vision but it proved unhelpful. “I think… I think my arm’s broken.” 
“Wait, seriously?” he asked, wobbling down to a seat beside you. 
“Yeah, it’s—”
“Everything okay over here?” a voice interrupted. You tried blinking again to take in the man that towered over the two of you, but the lights overhead washed him out. 
You recognized him…maybe? You felt like you were going to throw up. 
Sean answered for you. “Yeah, man, we’re fine. She just fell.” 
“Y/n, are you okay?” the man asked, ignoring your date completely.
“Do I know you?” you slurred.
You thought you heard a curse. “What made you think throwing her around was a good idea?” 
“Dude, it wasn’t even that fast. Or my fault. She just couldn’t keep her feet under her.” 
“Well, dude, maybe you should go home.” 
Sean scoffed. “Right, and who’s going to take this one home?” 
Your head was starting to hurt with all of the back and forth. The man that just joined, the taller one, kneeled down beside you. His blonde hair cast a harsh glare that had you squinting again. 
“You want me to call Bucky?” he asked.
Bucky? How would he know Bucky? Blonde hair began morphing into a man in your memory, and you reached for the material of his shirt, looping it between your fingers.
“Steve Rogers?” you mumbled. 
The man, now identified as Steve, sighed. “I’m calling him. Go home, Sean. Her roommate is coming to get her.” 
There was more discussion, something about Steve having the authority to kick him out and Sean not understanding what all of the fuss was about. Steve warned him about something and Sean scoffed as if the situation was beneath him. And then he left. 
Steve was then in your line of sight again, brows pinched together and a bright orange vest covering his shoulders. His hands hovered in front of you as if you’d break if he touched you and you almost found it funny. Steve was a huge guy with a lot of authority on Bucky’s team, but right now he looked like a scared animal. 
“Why are you dressed like a construction worker?” you asked. 
A small smile graced his face. “I’m working at the rink today. Everyone on the team has to take shifts during the holidays.” 
“Hmm,” you hummed. “I think my arm is broken.” 
“I know. I’m pretty sure you have a concussion too. Let’s get you off the ice, yeah?” 
You tried to nod, but that hurt too much so you let Steve assist you in shakily standing up. He guided you to the seats by the rental skate counter with a soft but sure hand on your back, asking some guy named Antonio for an ice pack. Everything around you felt like a fever dream. 
Gentle touches rolled the sleeve of your sweater back to reveal a swollen wrist that Steve immediately covered with an ice pack. 
He cursed again. “Well he’s gonna be pissed.” 
“Who?” Your head swayed with the question. 
Steve looked up to meet your gaze, lips parting to answer, when he was replaced by a different face. Your brain was having trouble keeping up with everything, obviously, because Bucky was in front of you now. He was kneeling between your legs with his hands on your face and you had no idea where Steve went. 
“What the fuck?” you blurted out. 
“Hey, y/n.” Bucky spoke your name low and soothing, his fingers moving to your eyes where he pried them open one at a time and looked for something you couldn’t see. His next words were directed over his shoulder. “Maybe a concussion. Tell me what happened again?” 
“Sean Marcus was being an ass. Flung her all over the place,” Steve replied. 
“Why are you here?” you interjected, trying to focus on one thing at a time. “I told you not to come on my date.” 
Bucky moved his assessment to your arm next, shifting the ice pack. “Never really agreed to those terms.” 
He turned back to Steve after that, having another discussion that you barely understood. Bucky absentmindedly fiddled with the material of your jeans as he spoke, and you put all of your energy into not face planting on the ground. This past week had truly been a series of terrible events with terrible men. 
After some amount of time elapsed, you were walking to the parking lot with a jacket thrown over your shoulders and Bucky continuously jutting a hand out each time you took a step. He was very well versed in concussions, apparently. 
“Okay, in you go, killer,” Bucky prompted, opening the passenger door. 
You eyed the front seat, scrunching your face up. “My arm hurts.” 
The man in front of you seemed to soften, his shoulders dropping on a long exhale. “I know, sweetheart. But we gotta go to the hospital to fix that. I’ll make sure it doesn’t hurt anymore.”
“I should just call Wanda. Or Nat. You don’t have to be the one to take me.” 
“I can take you just fine.”
“Why do you want to you? Aren’t you busy?” 
Another long sigh, this one accompanied by hands on your shoulders, fingers at the base of your neck. “Get in the car.”
His eyes were boring into yours, searching for something, or maybe already finding it there. You still had your arm cradled to your chest and you titled your head to the side as you observed him. There was something else to his gaze that you couldn’t quite describe. It reminded you of his expression after he came home from a rough game. Angry. Discontent. 
“You’re being weird,” you commented, breaking the silence you had created. 
“You broke your arm and smacked your head on the ice,” he simply replied, as if the statement was an explanation. 
“Yeah, but—” 
“And then that douchebag did nothing about it,” Bucky interrupted. “So please, y/n, get in the car so I can help you before I find him and kick his ass. Because you know I’m not above fighting people.” 
You blinked, and then slid into the front seat. 
The drive was quiet. You’d never been in Bucky’s car before, but the spinning in your head didn’t give you much space to inspect it too closely. You caught hockey gear in the back, a keycard to the rink dangling off the rearview mirror, and a small collection of hair ties in one of the cupholders. One caught your attention.
“Hey, this one’s mine.” You picked up the purple band and rolled it between your fingers. “Thief.” 
Bucky snatched it back. “Mine now.” 
He made a sharp turn that had you sucking air between your teeth and repositioning your arm. Bucky sent you a quick, achingly apologetic look. 
“Sorry, almost there.” A long beat of silence and then a mumbled, “I should keep your hair tie. You won’t be able to do your hair alone with a broken arm anyway.” 
~~
Your wrist was fractured, not broken. You also only had a minor concussion. This was all great news to you, especially since they told you after administering a hefty amount pain reliever. To Bucky, this was apparently terrible, life-altering news. 
After practically body slamming into the front door of your apartment, he chucked his wallet and keys down on the kitchen counter and began grumbling to himself as he opened and closed kitchen cabinets. You watched from a distance, half amused, half concerned for the rusting hinges. He finally found what he was looking for—a cup—and continued to mutter to himself as he filled it with gatorade. 
“Are you… okay?” you asked tentatively. 
Bucky ripped the freezer open and manhandled three to four ice cubes. “I’m fine. You are not.” 
“I’m okay now,” you assured. Bucky stalked over to you anyways, pressing the sports drink into your hand that was not wrapped in a cast.
You looked down at the glass and sent him a baffled look. He nodded at it and raised his brows, a silent demand for you to drink. 
“Okay. And why do I need to drink gatorade?” Your words were slow. 
“You were just on the ice and haven’t had any water for at least three hours.” 
“Bucky,” you began. “I was ice skating recreationally for about thirty minutes. I don’t need to replenish my electrolytes.” 
“Will you just… will you just drink the damn drink?” he groaned, gesturing to it with a firm hand. “Jesus, I can’t take care of you when you go and get yourself hurt by idiots. So just let me do what I know I can do, alright?” 
“You don’t have to take care of me.” You were beginning to raise your voice, matching some of the frustration in the room. 
Bucky threw his hands in the air, tugging at his roots on the way down. He moved further into the kitchen and leaned against the counter with stiff, rod-like arms propping him up. And then he sighed, long and profound as if this was the hardest conversation he’d had all year. His head hung heavy between stiff shoulders and you felt the environment shift. 
You almost wanted to intervene on his thoughts again, to make some comment about the dishes in the dishwasher or pretend you were going to go take a nap. But he had something to say, something you needed to hear, and so you stayed. You blinked and clenched your fist in the uncomfortable silence, but you stayed. 
“Y/n, I want to take care of you,” Bucky breathed out, words still directed toward the floor, almost too low to make out. “I’ve been tryna get you to see that for weeks now, but you’ve either got no clue or you want absolutely nothing to do with me.” 
You stopped blinking, stopped fidgeting, stopped breathing altogether. You watched as Bucky drummed his fingers against the counter and still refused to look up. You swallowed hard because you weren’t clueless, but also because you wanted everything to do with Bucky Barnes. 
And nothing at the same time. 
“Bucky…” you began, with a tone of surprise you weren’t sure was believable.
“Don’t do it yet,” he stopped you. “Don’t…don’t tell me no yet. I’m still pissed as hell that you got hurt and you shouldn’t be alone with a concussion. I don’t need you avoiding me when you can’t even drive a car.” 
“You’re being presumptuous.” 
He snapped his head up, his eyes rushing back and forth between your own. The drumming on the counter ceased, instead replaced by balled up fists turning white under days old cuts and fading bruises. He didn’t say anything. You searched the empty air for a reply. 
“I wouldn’t avoid you. I don’t know if I could avoid you—not anymore. You’re sort of a big part of my life now.” A good start, you thought. Not a real answer, but not a rejection. 
Bucky bit the inside of his cheek and eyed the drink still perspiring in your hand. You set it down at his observance, moving closer to his slumped posture in the kitchen. 
But Bucky stood up straight at your movement, becoming guarded, stiff. “I shouldn’t have said anything. Bad timing, just forget it. You should try and get some sleep.” 
“I don’t want to forget it,” you softly spoke, shaking your head.
He clenched his jaw. “And I don’t want to hear that you don’t feel the same way about me that I feel about you. Not right now. I feel like I’m going insane, watching you go out on dates and having my best friend tell me that my girl—that’s not really my girl—is all banged up on the ice because of some asshole.” 
You opened your mouth to speak, but Bucky kept going, now pacing in the kitchen. “I mean, y/n, you’re my everyday. I wake up and you’re making coffee. You text me in class to ask what I need at the grocery store and then I call you after practice to make sure you got back to the apartment. I think about you so god damn much and I can’t believe there was a time in my life that I didn’t get to end my day in a home that has you. And you’re just my roommate. You want nothing to do with athletes, I get it—” he added, catching your eye in the middle of his rant, “—but, shit, I haven’t even looked at another girl since… well it doesn’t even matter.”
“Tell me,” you whispered. There were a million other things you could’ve said, a million explanations that would have made sense. But the two soft words stopped Bucky from tracking holes in the ground. They shoved him from his shallow breaths and made him look at you. 
And, god, did he look at you. You must have been worse for wear. A hospital visit mixed with one too many tumbles onto solid ice probably had your hair in disarray and your face pressed with exhaustion, but his gaze was revering. Candy-coated red with soft blues melting below brows that fluxed with the movement of his lips; Bucky was beautiful, and he was looking at you as if you matched.
His tone confirmed as much, light and saccharin as he said, “That dumb movie a few weeks ago, the one about the superheroes. Your friends wouldn’t watch it with you so you made me. You were so excited even though it was awful and you were out like a light within the first hour. You rolled over onto me and I wasn’t gonna wake you up so I sorta just held you.” 
He paused, trailing his eyes up to the light fixtures. “At the risk of sounding pathetic, it felt like I had you, you know? Like we were going through all our usual motions, but after I annoyed the hell out of you and you told me off, you were mine. I can’t… I can’t really picture that with another girl.” 
There were very few times you had considered yourself speechless. But with Bucky Barnes standing in front of you, red-faced and vulnerable and still wearing the stupid hospital nametag they made him put on in the waiting room, you had no words. There was none of the arrogance you usually associated with him, no short-temper or pestering taunts. It was just Bucky, and he was pouring his heart onto the kitchen floor. For you. 
“You get why you can’t tell me no just yet?” he asked, trying to get something out of you. Anything. “You can break my heart, but let me just make sure you’re okay first. And I can’t beat the shit out of Sean if we aren’t on speaking terms.” 
The laugh that left you was one of disbelief, but the breathiness and accompanying tears fit the heaviness of the room. Your glossy eyes met Bucky’s and something flashed on his face, but it was soon out of your line of sight because you were kissing him. You were kissing him hard and your bodies were too close for the cast between you but it didn’t matter. 
He didn’t respond at first, hand hovering at your back. But then he did and the cold linoleum of the kitchen floor was gone from your bare feet. He sat you on the counter, so gently, as if you were glass, and you let your hand brush against the cracks and divots of your home. The one that Bucky came back to every night to see you. 
The one that had housed so many nights of confusion and longing and denial.
The one that had Bucky kissing the life out of you on the kitchen counter. 
He pulled away first, forehead pressed to yours. “Didn’t think I’d ever get to do that.” 
“You can do it again.” 
“Oh, I will, baby.” 
Laughter met in the air between you—sweet, short, intertwined. There was so much you wanted to tell him, so many instances like the one he shared before where you were left questioning boundaries and feelings and lines. But, you figured, there would be so many opportunities to tell him. So much time together. 
“I texted Wanda that night,” you shared, interrupting the kisses he was pressing to your cheek. “After I woke up and you had taken me back to my room.” 
He smiled against your skin. “What’d you say?” 
“I told her I was an idiot—that I was falling for the enemy.” 
Bucky ran a soft hand along the back of your head, a smirk lighting up his face. He was slotted between your legs and kept his other hand firmly pressed onto the kitchen counter, caging you in, making sure your arm didn’t hit the cabinets. 
“And is that true?” 
“I don’t know,” you hummed, connecting your foreheads once again, wanting to stay impossibly close. “Try to cure my broken bone with gatorade again and we’ll see.”
7K notes · View notes
sixosix · 29 days
Note
m m m m maybe blanket plus yuuta plus hurt/comfort maybe. maybe 🤞
in which rika likes you because yuuta definitely, definitely does.
warnings wc 800, mention of injuries and descriptions of blood !! careful when u read <3 also i took hurt comfort literally BWHAHSAH hope i did your expectations justice nyx ily
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“Yuuta. Yuuuuta.”
Rika’s voice echoed in the quiet hall. Yuuta winced, wishing Rika would keep it down; it was 2 AM, and no one would appreciate being woken up around this hour. But he knew that if he said so, Rika would be sad, and he didn’t want to hurt Rika and cause a worse scene.
“I’m fine, Rika-chan, really,” Yuuta murmured.
Rika growled unhappily. Yuuta, too, knew that he was lying. Although his wounds weren't life-threatening, he still needed to get them treated before they got infected. But Yuuta had just come back to this room—he was so, so tired. Sleeping in wouldn’t hurt anyone but him, right?
“Yuuta!” Rika snapped. It reverberated and shook the walls.
“Shh, Rika-chan,” Yuuta whispered hastily. “Please, our friends are sleeping.”
“Yuuta?” 
Both Yuuta and Rika fell silent, alarmed. That voice certainly wasn’t Rika’s, and it most definitely came from the door.
“Yuuta?” you asked again, followed by a knock. “Are you okay in there?”
“I—I’m—I’m fine!” Yuuta yelped.
“Didn’t you just come back from a mission? Why are you here instead at Ieiri-sensei’s?” Your voice was muffled by the barrier that separated you both, but it was still enough of your voice to have Yuuta’s ears reddening.
“I was! I’m resting now!” Yuuta lied straight through his teeth, embarrassed beyond belief. In truth, he didn’t want to disturb her.
“Yuuta’s a liar!” Rika chose not to stay silent at the worst time. “Liar!”
The door swung open. Yuuta didn’t have enough time to hide a steadily growing red shirt or his pretty much the same face. The air thickened as you drew closer, and Yuuta struggled to tell if it was because of Rika or his reaction to you.
“Okkotsu Yuuta,” you said, deceptively calm. Yuuta felt the hair on the back of his arms rise in alarm. “Yuuta, don’t tell me that the stain on your shirt isn’t from ketchup.”
It was his blood, so Yuuta obediently stayed silent.
You sighed and spun around to leave the room. Yuuta’s chest ached as he watched you leave. His lip trembled, and he looked over to Rika, who seemed to be giving him that same stare of disappointment.
Yuuta shrunk in on himself. “I think I made Y/N mad…”
“Stupid Yuuta,” Rika trilled. “Yuuta is an idiot!”
“I know, I know,” Yuuta cried. “I get it now.”
As he was preparing to wallow, Footsteps emerged once again. You burst into the room with a first aid kit and a stern glare that made the protests die on Yuuta’s tongue. Strangely, Rika was silent.
“Let me see,” you demanded.
Yuuta’s face flamed with embarrassment, but he obliged and tugged on his shirt. Most of the injuries were cuts on his torso that would surely hurt once he showered, but again, it wasn’t anything worth all of this. He braced himself for the stinging pain once the cotton grazed his open wound, but instead, he found himself too flustered by your proximity to even notice you were already working on his wounds.
The room was dead silent, save for Yuuta’s labored breathing. Rika had disappeared; Yuuta chalked it up to him not being in danger anymore. 
“Yuuta, if this happens again, come to my room, okay?” you said softly. 
“I can’t—”
“Yes, you can. I’m asking you to.”
Yuuta deflated. “I can’t just disturb you.”
“I want you to disturb me.”
What a dangerous thing to say. Yuuta’s gaze went sharper. “You don’t mean that.”
“I do.” Your touch was too gentle. You faced Yuuta’s gaze head-on, fearless. “And you would do the same for me. Aren’t you the one being unfair?”
Yuuta sighed. He could never win when it came to you, anyway.
“Thought so,” you mused, carefully pulling his shirt down again. “You should learn how to ask, Yuuta.”
“I’m trying,” he muttered.
You tugged on the blanket folded neatly by his side and draped it over his shoulders. The heat of your touch remained in the blanket's warmth. When you stepped back to grin proudly at your work on a flustered and helplessly endeared Yuuta, you then frowned.
“Hey, where’d Rika go? I thought she wanted to share the blanket.”
“I think she wanted you to share it with me,” Yuuta said before he could think about it.
“Oh.” You blinked. “Is that so? Well, I guess that’s not a bad idea.”
Liar, he could hear Rika’s voice. Well, he never denied it.
Yuuta laid down carefully and lifted an arm from under the blanket. You crawled inside and settled beside him, launching into a ramble about how you were worried sick when Yuuta didn’t return early. He still struggled to ask for what he wanted, so he would settle for this.
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yandereend · 7 days
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Yandere Househusband
The wedding
P. 2/?
TW : normal yandere stuff, dubcon, reader is into it?, Tyler talks about children, both are like 18 or 19
Btw English is not my first language so please keep that in mind
🩵Also thanks to everyone who wrote nice comments under the first post🩵
You sometimes watched those trashy shows about the bridezillas who were obsessed with their weddings and made everyones live hell. Like many people you hopped to never be in a situation like this. But here you were sitting besides your fiancé while he discusses flower arrangements, acting like a giant brat.
Is it so hard to put together bouquets with ALL pink flowers?!
Sir we dont have enough pink lillies for all your decorations. You should reconsider some of your choices-
I‘m surrounded by idiots!! My spouse wanted pink lillies so i don’t care if you don’t have them stocked!! Just buy them!
That would be even more expen-
Just do it !!!
And with that Tyler took your hand and you both exited the flower shop. It was almost comical how such a small thing could affect a grown man so much, but hey it’s his day. Tyler had a big pout on his face so that called for your attention and pampering.
Tyler don’t be upset.
But its our day my darling, everything should be perfect! We spend so much time picking out your (suit/dress/whatever you want its your wedding) and my suit. The flowers have to match or everything was for nothing my dear!
Not everything has to be perfect.
Oh yes it does! Have you never been on pinterest ?
That was the whole wedding planning in a nutshell , just an avid pinterest user placing together the wedding of their dreams( yandere style). Sometimes it was cute seeing Tyler being so invested in the wedding, other times it was more than annoying to cater to his perfectionism.
You also often thought about how quickly things progressed. I mean you just graduated high school and are already engaged and working for your fiancés father. Tylers father, Eric, was a great boss, you often wondered why people were scared of him. It’s just your nice father in law! Always explaining everything to you and hyping you up as the next in line of the family business. I mean you’re almost a part of it.
And Tylers mother, Ramona, was the same, always acting like she’s your real mother and caring for you. Not to mention Tyler himself. You were not suprised when he didn’t went out to look for a job or university, he always promoted the idea of a traditional family with you as the breadwinner in the center. And hey, his parents gifted you a house as an engagement gift, so its safe to say that you wont suffer in the presence of those saints.
At least that’s what you thought of them, little did you know that they were the reason why most of your friends cut contact and your family hardly called after you moved out. But hey who needs them anyways.
So while all these thoughts ran through your mind here you were, walking down the aisle with your father and finally seeing the man of your dreams in his perfectly tailored suit and styled hair, with tears in his eyes witnessing your beauty.
Your wedding vow was rather short but still packed with the love you felt for your husband. And after he put himself together, because of his happy tears, he read the most beautiful wedding vow you ever heard touching your heart and everyone else’s in the chapel. So when you finally get to put the rings on each other’s fingers you both stand up there with tears in your eyes.
And when you both finally unite in a grand kiss your fate was finally sealed. Tyler had you finally completely in his grasp, even if you didn’t realize it. And he,as well as his family, will never let you go. So enjoy your wedding party with your family and friends, you won’t get to see them any longer my dear.
Till death do you apart.
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🩵Thanks a lot I hope you enjoyed it, I am planning on making this a series so please comment ideas for your life with your new husband 🩵
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mysterystarz · 2 months
Text
kiss me maybe:
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summary: finding a flier for the volleyball's kissing booth was surprising for two reasons. a) kuroo had created one of the worst fliers known to mankind and b) oikawa tooru, the school's resident pretty boy was capitalizing off the rumors surrounding him. still, you couldn't deny your attraction to the setter, and he couldn't hide that you were the only one he wanted to kiss
pairing: oikawa tooru x g!n reader
word count: 12.6k (please give this a chance)
genres + themes: college!au, sort of friends to lovers(?), fluff, angst, kuroo being an occasional menace, iwaizumi being the sexiest friend you can have, kiyoko being an icon, romanticized college experience, oikawa being an idiot but yours
warnings: cursing, a tad suggestive in some parts, absolutely not proofread
a/n: hi there i am back with a long fic. anyways this thing is my lovechild and probs the most fanfic thing ive written. its really just a fluff monster (lol) and i hope you give this a chance <3 also dedicated to @chimielie because her stuff gave me the inspo to write ily lia thank you for being so talented
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It was said that Oikawa Tooru’s kisses were mythical. 
Some claimed that one press of lips from the kingly setter was like a hit of a drug, sudden in a way that sent you reeling. 
To some, his kisses tasted like the finest candy, hand served on an ornate dish. 
Most magically, it was claimed that a kiss from Oikawa Tooru could heal even the most broken of hearts. Just one thread through sun bronzed hair could make you forget about the most painful memories. 
And of course, like any celebrity would, he knew about each and every rumor.
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Naturally, you reckoned you were bound to see the dreaded flier sooner or later. It sat there still, taped onto the tiny bulletin board outside of the Organic Chemistry I room. It was the worst godawful flier you’d ever seen in your life. In front of you was a myriad of colorful borders, and even more whimsical fonts atop of a cardstock page. It seemed to call out to you with its boldness, as if to say “kiss me” with its scrawling typography. 
Mystic Kissbooth, it read in an infuriatingly ornate font. Come and kiss your woes away (and kiss ours away too – a mutually beneficial fundraiser!) 
“I see you’ve seen our handiwork,” chuckled a voice. You didn’t have to turn around to recognize Kuroo, who simply leaned against the bulletin board in an attempt to catch your expression. 
Not that he would. You weren’t going to give him that luxury. 
“No wonder it’s such shit,” you laughed, gesturing to the list of names at the bottom, “I’m honestly ashamed to even know you.”
“Hey,” he frowned playfully, ruffling your hair as he began his signature large strides. Curse him and his stupidly long legs. “That was heavily inspired by your Canva templates…..you know….the bad ones.” 
You let out a long and dragged out sigh while you followed your best friend (unfortunately) to one of the secluded benches on campus. Beneath the hustle and bustle of students as they sprinted to class, it was almost peaceful to rest your legs for just a moment. 
Relaxing onto the bench, you placed your backpack at your side, creating a wedge between you and Kuroo, who’d taken the seat right next to you. He didn’t seem to mind, simply casting a grin in your direction. 
For starters, you weren’t sure how to feel about the Canva invasion. Yes, it was a design platform, and yes, you’d tried (and failed sometimes) to create infographics whenever Kuroo needed a helping hand. It was just a tad surprising to discover that Kuroo had drawn his inspiration from your least successful works. 
“What’s this whole thing about?” You decided on asking after a lengthy pause. Kuroo cast his gaze to meet your own, his grin almost glued into place. 
“Well, not that we’re in any trouble, but the volleyball club could use some funds. We’ve been trying to set up some pretty competitive matches and practice games, but we need the fuel to do it. Oikawa thought this was a great way to make use of all the attention we have.”
“No wonder. He’s probably the most popular one on the team….though Iwaizumi is honestly the one to be looking at.” 
“Rude,” Kuroo huffed, “There’s a lot of other people to be interested in, you know.”
“Hopefully you don’t mean yourself,” you chuckled, dodging a playful hit on the arm from Kuroo. “But in all seriousness, a kissing booth?” Kuroo paused for a moment, seemingly mulling over a proper response, when Iwaizumi entered your frame of vision. 
There were times you wondered why Iwaizumi Hajime didn’t consider a career in modeling. From where he stood, the sunlight almost seemed to caress his skin, tanned and sun bronzed from a summer spent playing volleyball on the beach. Upon seeing you and Kuroo on the bench, he extended a quick wave before jogging over, arms flexing as he got closer. 
“Stop ogling him,” Kuroo smirked, “You could stand to be a bit less obvious.” “Shut up,” you muttered just as Iwaizumi ended his jog to stand in front of you. 
“Nice to see you here,” he beamed, his eyes meeting your own, “I barely see you around these days. Did Kuroo scare you away from the club?” “No not at all,” you smiled, moving your backpack to make space for the handsome spiker. Some of the students on the nearby path stopped to turn at the three of you, and Iwaizumi, none-the-wiser, took a swig from his water bottle. 
He was never aware of the effect he had on people. That was exactly what contributed to his charm. 
“Y/N wanted to know a bit more about the booth,” Kuroo started. “I think you’d explain it better than I could.” 
Iwaizumi raised a brow, “It’s just a club fundraiser. I mean, it's the only decent idea that Oikawa’s had in a while.”
“So he really was involved, huh.” You said (more to yourself than anyone else). The two men looked at you confusedly, before Kuroo finally spoke. 
“You know, you always seem to get a bit fidgety whenever someone mentions Oikawa. And you always try to be away from him when you come to our practices…were the two of you involved or something? Because if you were, I am honestly offended you didn’t tell me.” 
You aggressively shook your head no, warranting a chuckle from Iwaizumi. “Well, if they were, I think it’s had an impact. You start to see him for who he really is.” 
The three of you laughed, choosing to enjoy the fresh breeze. 
However, even despite the simple beauty of this moment, you couldn’t stop yourself from thinking about the booth.
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Oikawa stood at the front of the lecture hall, spinning his pen while meeting the eyes of his teammates. At his side was Kuroo’s flier, whimsically colorful in all the ways a magical kissing booth (like this one) was supposed to be. Iwaizumi sat in the front, close enough for Oikawa to catch the teasingly judgy stares of his best friend while he waited for everyone to settle down. 
Finding a free lecture hall had been no problem. All he’d had to do is smile nicely at a few eager students, verify with a few professors, and send a frantic “MEET NOW” to the club group chat. 
The real problem was convincing the rest of the team of this idea in the first place. 
“Hey guys,” he beamed, putting the flier down on the desk closest to him, “Thanks for showing up on such short notice. You guys are the best.” 
“We didn’t come for you,” Makki snickered. “We’re just here to see what crazy justification you have for this.” “Well,” he began, “We’ve been in the spotlight for quite some time now. A lot of us have been featured in the campus newspaper, we’ve made it onto our university’s podcast, and have you even seen the instagram fanpages for us? They’re absolutely insane. So, what better time to take advantage of this?” 
“And this has nothing to do at all with the rumors?” A voice asked. Oikawa turned to meet the eyes of Semi Eita, who sat on the left corner closest to the door. 
The team laughed as Oikawa shook his head in faux denial. “Absolutely not. Why would I ever do such a thing?” 
“Because you're smart!” Oikawa was almost surprised to hear the remark from Bokuto, who sat near Kuroo with his own flier. “And it’s a lot of fun.” 
The team murmured their respective agreements before the room fell silent again. Oikawa, ever the opportunist, slid into the silence with an explanation. 
“I was thinking we set it up as sort of a de-stress day after midterms. We could get the other clubs to join in their own mini fundraisers…like a carnival of sorts. We’ll set up the booth with colorful signs and posters, and we kiss based on the cash. We can take shifts to make sure the two of us aren’t running the whole show. All proceeds are for our matches and practice games. Sounds good?” “A question. Are you going to make people line up to kiss you?” Matsukawa asked casually. 
“You mean us Mattsun. And yeah, a line works just fine.” Oikawa stopped for a moment to admire the unanimous cooperation of his team. “I’ll talk to the other club leaders and see if we can come up with a date. If that’s all the questions you’ve got, I’ll see you at practice tomorrow!” 
With this, his team filed out the door. He caught Kuroo animatedly discussing a design to attract customers to their booth with Bokuto, mentioning that he had a friend who’d know just what to do about it. In the midst of his rant, he’d mentioned a name. 
Yours. A name he hadn’t realized he missed hearing. 
A faint smile crept onto his face at the thought.
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Kuroo was a menace. From the minute he’d found you at the library, he’d been nagging you the entire day, practically begging for you to come to their practice. 
“Y/N please,” he whined, attempting his own version of a pout, “If you see us, you could help design the poster to attract customers.” “I don’t think you need help with that.” That much was true. Especially with Oikawa headlining the event. They were guaranteed strong profits. 
Somehow in the midst of all this pleading, you’d ended up right outside the gym. The sounds of volleyballs hitting the wooden floors resonated off the walls, the sound so clear that you could hear it from your spot near the door. 
“You planned this,” you glared, watching Kuroo’s smile twist into one of faux innocence. Bastard.  
“What can I say? I am the master of distraction.” He opened the door, swapping his shoes out at the front and walking into the gym to the greetings of his team. You followed closely behind him, carefully striding across the polished wood and shutting the door behind you. 
The gym had always been grand. Your university’s colors were plastered onto the bleachers, with a wide curtain separating the different sides of the gym. There was space – so much of it – and the team spread out to practice various skills. 
For a brief moment, you allowed yourself the childish awe of standing in a space so big. 
“I forgot how long it’s been since you’ve been here,” a voice greeted, “But it’s good to see you Y/N.” You knew that voice. You’d know that voice like the moon knew the stars. You’d know it anywhere. 
“Oikawa,” you said, turning to acknowledge the brown-haired setter. “Long time no see.”
As much as you didn’t want to, you drank him in. He seemed to be in high spirits this afternoon, hair artfully tousled in the way he always did, and lips so perfectly smooth that they seemed out of a Chapstick ad. 
“You don’t really come around anymore,” He said, taking to walking with you around the gym (much to your own surprise). “I was getting a bit worried actually.” 
“What do you mean?” You stared at a spot a bit beyond the setter, watching Bokuto’s cross court spike slam into the floor with dizzying speed. 
“Well….we talked a bunch. And you came here at the beginning of the year. You suddenly stopped though….so I wondered if something happened.” 
“You noticed?” You scoffed. “I’m surprised you paid attention.” 
“Why wouldn’t I pay attention?” Oikawa raised a brow in confusion before suddenly, the answer seemed to smack him in the face. “You’re petty about that?”
“You barely paid me any mind,” was all you said, meeting Oikawa’s warm gaze, “It was like we’d never met at all.”
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You’d met Oikawa Tooru on the flight to university. You’d waved your family goodbye at the gate, hugging them tight to your chest and memorizing the feel of them against you. 
You walked steadily, pulling your suitcase along as you made your way to the security check in. 
“Everything goes in a bag! Belts, shoes, phones! Take off your shoes and step aside. Laptops can stay in your bags! Move along!” 
You hauled your suitcase into the bin, placed your phone and wallet beside it and sent it over to the TSA associate, taking a minute to place your jacket and shoes into another bin and sending that over too. 
The gray bins were plain, old and rackety and classic, comparable to a washed out 1930’s movie. You trodded through the metal detector, feeling the cold floor through your socks. 
When you finally made it through check in, you were met with a TSA associate over your bag, looking straight at you as if you’d committed some heinous crime. 
“Excuse me,” the TSA officer asked, gesturing to your bags, “Are these your bags?” 
“Yes,” you affirmed, almost nervously. “Is there an issue?” 
“You seem to have some liquid above the restricted amount. I’m going to have to take a look.” 
For a moment, you were startled. What did you even bring? You’d diligently packed your belongings and made sure everything was secure….surely there had to be some mistake. 
Your breath wavered the minute the officer pulled out your favorite body wash. 
In the midst of your packing, you’d forgotten you’d slipped it into your carry on. 
“Oh.” Your voice shook as you meant the TSA officer’s eyes, “I’m sorry. That’s my favorite one.” 
“I’m sorry.” For a moment, it almost seemed like the man had sympathy for you, “But I’m going to have to ask you to pour half of it out. If you refuse that, you’re going to have to give it away.” 
Every step towards the outside garbage felt like a punch to the chest. While you kept composed on the outside, pouring away half of your prized wash felt miserable. 
A dying rose. A dying star. Something dying slowly and surely inside. 
Now you’d have to get another one. Brand new packaging lost to your honest mistake. 
This sucked ass. 
You meandered through the security area again, more ghost than person and collected the rest of your belongings. While your voice wavered, you didn’t shed a tear, and simply walked along. 
Somehow, in the midst of all your wandering,  you ended up in the departure lounge. In front of you were an array of connected seats with their generic cushioning and the customary TV screens telling you what flight was taking off when. 
The glass paneled windows to your right showcased the hangar, and from your spot, you could see planes parked out in front. The sun set down in the distance, leaving a watercolor blend of pinks and oranges in its wake. 
You could almost call it picturesque. 
You leaned your suitcase against a wall for a moment, scanning the lounge for an available corner. Unfortunately, your plane was packed. 
The chatter of students was overwhelming, and without a choice, you settled into a seat at the far corner of the lounge next to a pretty-boy who you were certain wouldn't speak to you. 
They normally never did. Why should it be any different now? And honestly, you didn’t want to talk. 
“This plane is probably fully booked.” A voice (the perfect blend of warm and deep) said. You turned to meet the eyes of said pretty boy, a surprisingly lovely shade of brown. Light and bright and inviting. Almost like a mocha. Or a latte. 
“Tell me about it,” you laughed, slightly amused by the novelty of the situation. It wasn’t common for pretty boys to talk to you. Even less common for you to entertain any conversation, especially when you felt the way you did.  “When I waved ‘goodbye’ to my family, I wasn’t expecting this much of a crowd to tell them about.” 
“Yeah?” Oikawa smiled, the corners of his mouth lifting upwards invitingly. “I was more surprised at the lack of seats.” 
“You’d think they’d anticipate a college student stampede.” 
Oikawa laughed, the amusement lighting up his whole face. It was a simple laugh — chiming and lovely in the way that all laughs were, but you were certain you’d do anything to hear that again. 
His presence had a way of putting you at ease. 
The two of you coincidentally had seats right next to each other on the flight. As the plane lifted off, you snapped a picture of the city lights, twinkling their tiny goodbyes as they faded from view.
The cabin’s lights were dimmed, yet even in the haziness, you could make out the features of the boy next to you. 
High cheekbones. A defined cupid’s bow. Lips that seemed even softer than the lather of that soap you loved so much. 
You’d mourn your soap later. Even if it was an object, your attachment to it simply showed a care for your belongings. 
What could be more human than that? 
Oikawa turned to you, gaze friendly as the plane began its mounting ascent. 
“You know, the TSA can be real dicks sometimes.” 
What the fuck. Who was he? A psychic?
“What did they do to you?”
“They made me pour out half my expensive hair gel. I insisted it fit the requirements but they refused to accommodate me. So mean.” 
You couldn’t help but laugh at the pout he wore. It seemed even someone as vivacious as Oikawa couldn’t charm himself out of aviation regulations. 
Somehow the whole thing made you feel a lot better. 
You and Oikawa (Tooru as he later insisted) shared many conversations throughout the flight. Some revolved around human existentialism (with him quoting the “we were infinite” from The Perks of Being a Wallflower). Some revolved around space. 
Some even revolved around clubs, with him sharing high school volleyball stories and pledging your university’s team to greatness. 
When fatigue finally claimed you, the comfort of his shoulder was unmatched by anything you’d ever felt. He’d extended an invite for you to come and see them practice anytime, and laid his own head atop of yours. 
Of course, when you showed up for said practice, so had a bunch of other fans. He’d barely spared you a glance, let alone spoke to you when you’d tried to seek him out. 
A grand gym and an even grander boy. 
You just avoided him after that.
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“Im really sorry about that,” Oikawa said. While his expressions were genuine, you weren’t sure how much you were going to trust it. Certainly, in all the time you’d spent apart, he must have changed at least a bit. 
To think he was the exact same boy who you met on the plane would be foolish.
“Yeah, water under the bridge.” 
“No, not really.” Oikawa paused to study your expression. Beneath all of your nonchalance was something fragile. Admiration? Loathing? He doubted it. “How long did you plan on avoiding me?”
“As long as I needed to.” You answered matter-of-factly. “Then again, that was when I thought you’d forgotten about me.” 
“How could I ever do that?” Oikawa’s expression morphed into a worried one, eyebrows knitted together and mouth downturned as if to say damn that’s an accusation. 
“Well-“
“Look I meant to seek you out after that day. I saw you there, wanted to come over, but at that point you’d gone off to continue chatting with Kuroo and met Iwa. And classes exist.”
“Okay. Water under the bridge for real.” 
His eyes lit up. “You mean it?” 
You nodded in approval, only to be dragged away by Kuroo, who’d suddenly appeared behind you. 
“What the fuck?” You yelled, not caring much for your use of profanities. Some of the nearby team members snickered as you were pulled to the corner of the gym, in front of an array of poster boards. 
“What?” Kuroo asked, “You and Oikawa seem to be fine now, so I thought I could ask you some questions about stuff that really matters. Namely posters.” 
You were met with various shapes and sizes of poster boards. Some were Elmers Tri-Folds. Some were the cheap foam boards you sometimes saw while grocery shopping. 
“If you want a design for your freaking booth,” you began, looking at Kuroo, “Give me some time.”
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Oikawa was in the podcast studio. The room was secluded, plastered with posters and heart decals of all shapes and colors. Right beside the door was a framed picture of the volleyball team, with their silly faces frozen in motion. 
Shimizu Kiyoko walked out from behind the desk, nonchalantly acknowledging Oikawa with a nod. “Oikawa, what can I do for you?” 
“Hey,” he winked, unaffected by her lack of reaction, “Have any idea where I can find your host. I’d like her to do me a favor.”
“Advertising.” Kiyoko said bluntly. “I don’t think your booth needs any more attention. Our socials have covered it already.” 
“We always love the extra coverage.” 
“Doesn’t your friend help with all the designs? I think they’d be the perfect candidate to help with all this.”
“Y/N?” He asked, almost dumbfounded by how obvious that answer was. 
“Yes,” Kiyoko smiled. “They’re very nice. I’ve seen you talk a few times, though it honestly seems like they don’t like you very much.” 
“Not true.” He huffed. 
“Well it makes sense. Especially if the rumors are true.” 
People saw Kiyoko’s beauty and shyness and mistook her for a soft and innocent podcast manager. 
Anyone who’d dealt with her enough knew she was actually a force to be reckoned with. 
“The rumors are whatever you make of them. I’m simply an opportunist.” 
Kiyoko chuckled and for a moment, Oikawa felt accomplished. “You don’t need to tell me this. I already know.” 
He leaned against the door, and stretched out his arms in front of him before resting them at his sides again. “Would you at least consider telling the main host to help us out?” 
Kiyoko shuffled the papers in her hands, before meeting his eyes. “I won’t give any guarantees, but something tells me that if you do set up a de-stress carnival, your club will be the central focus of our broadcast.” 
“Thank you!” He beamed, feeling like a weight had been lifted off his chest. “I could kiss you for that.”
“No thank you,” Kiyoko declined, “I’m not interested in confirming the rumors.” 
As Oikawa left the studio, Kiyoko walked into the recording room, a tiny smile on her lips.
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Your Canva page lay woefully blank before you.
You’d promised Kuroo a design if he gave you time and Kuroo, ever the considerate friend, actually stopped bothering you about the poster. He seemed to trust in Oikawa’s judgment, and it seemed that the rest of the volleyball club did too. 
As a token of thanks, you’d come to the library, your brain and Pinterest providing you at least a vague idea of what it was you wanted to do. However, when it came time to put pen to paper (or more fittingly, hand to mousepad), it seemed that your ideas had been wiped clean. 
Your disappointment felt like a leaky faucet. Despite the minuteness of the feeling, it seemed to pool the more you thought about the situation. While designing was never an obligation, you owed it to your friends. 
You sighed, placing your bag onto the hardwood library table and casting your eyes outside. A slowly setting sun was what greeted you, a medley of pinks and oranges appearing onto a slowly disappearing blue sky. 
How cliche. Considering one's disappointments next to a sunset. 
“Y/N?” A voice called, almost saccharine in the silence of your surroundings. 
And there he was. Draped in the setting sun like a painted figure, cloaked in a veil of sunlight that skimmed his skin like silk. Oikawa’s eyes were almost honey colored in that lighting, and beneath the darkened shelves, he was almost a mystical apparition. 
“Oikawa,” was all you said, cursing every possible force for him appearing now, looking like that, when you barely had anything to show for it. 
“Kuroo told me you’d offered to help us put together some signs for the de-stress carnival.” Oikawa walked over, stepping away from the sunlight and placing his bag down at your table, opting for a seat across from you. “Which, in case you were wondering, I got approval for. A lot of the other clubs are going to be there.” 
“That’s good.” You allowed yourself a glance at him. Your pettiness had all but dissipated, but you were still wary of looking at him for too long. He was like the sun, golden and lustrous and magnetic. You weren’t quite ready to be pulled into his orbit. 
“So,” Oikawa said, taking a glance at your computer screen, “Rough designing?” 
“Yeah. Inspiration has been hard to find and your club is counting on me.” 
“If it means anything to you, we wouldn’t have asked for you to do it if we didn’t believe in you.” You looked up to see Oikawa’s gaze set firmly on your own, as if tracking your expressions. Under his stare, you felt raw. Vulnerable. If you were a cake, and he was cutting you open. 
You weren’t sure what to say. 
A beat of silence permeated the space between you, and the two of you made no effort to stop it. It was somewhat comforting. Unsaid words of yours were understood by him.
“It feels like a lot of pressure,” you finally admitted, letting out a breath you didn’t even know you were holding. “I want it to be worth your while.” 
“Why wouldn’t it be?” Oikawa was closer. His breath was soft, fanning over the side of your cheek like a secret. 
“I’m not sure.” Your voice was nothing more than a whisper. 
Oikawa paused for a moment, as if contemplating something before decisively placing his hand on top of yours.
For a moment, you were startled by the warmth of his palm, grounding you in some way that didn’t quite make sense to you yet. Something about this was intimate in all the ways it shouldn’t be. Amidst a darkening sky and a slowly dimming library, you could almost consider this clandestine. 
You waited for the rustle of a book’s pages or the resounding footsteps of the librarian to break down the moment, but they never came.  
Oikawa looked at you, seemingly memorizing your features. He said nothing, but a slight smile appeared on his face the second he spotted a stray lock of hair by your ear. You could feel your face progressively heating with every moment spent in this proximity. 
Damn celebrity setters. Damn stupid stupid beautiful men who do this. Damn that Oikawa Tooru. 
Gently, as if touching something fragile, Oikawa smoothed down your hair, brushing the tip of your ear with his fingertips. He held your gaze fondly before suddenly, making an incredulous face. 
“What the-“ He said, looking at your hair again. “It’s back up again.” He looked at his hands in horror, as if their magic didn’t work. “Damn it, that’s not how that goes.” 
You couldn’t stop the laughter from erupting out of you at his antics, You swiftly flattened that pesky strand and looked back at him, feeling the amusement pool in your chest at his dismayed expression. 
“Sorry man,” you laughed, syllables coming out breathless, “Sometimes stuff doesn’t go to plan.” 
Oikawa seemed like he wanted to melt into the floor, and feeling the need for some fresh air, you dragged him out of the library. Upon leaving the double doors (and air conditioning), you were met by the lit sidewalk and found the wooden benches by the line of trees. 
You sat down, gesturing for him to join you. 
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen this one before,” Oikawa mentioned off-handedly, “I mean I’m here a lot, but I’m not sure when this was put here.” 
“It’s been here…?” 
Oikawa sighed, tilting his gaze to the now dark sky. “You do have an eye for good things.” 
You raised a brow. “What does that even mean?” 
“The stuff you make is adorable. And Kuroo’s always said that everywhere he brings us are all places you found.” 
“Really?” You leaned your upper body onto the bench. “I didn’t expect credit from him.” 
“He cares about you,” Oikawa said. “He gave a lot of shit when he realized that we’d talked on our plane and then not again. But I deserved that.” 
“I was petty. But it’s not like I can actually walk up to you.” 
“What?” Oikawa seemed puzzled, as if this was something impossible for him to fathom. “Why not? I don’t think I’m that bad.” 
“Iwaizumi says otherwise.” 
“Mean. But seriously, why?” 
You’d forgotten how refreshing Oikawa was. Even though you were sitting on a bench, you felt practically weightless. 
“Rumors,” was all you said, gesturing to him. 
Understanding seemed to flash into his eyes, and slowly, like connecting pieces of a puzzle, it all fell into place. He paused for a moment before meeting your eyes with a grin. 
“You know they’re just rumors right?” He smirked, “I went to a party a while back to kick off club season. There was this one girl who really wasn’t leaving me alone, so I ended up leaving. Turns out she’d told her friends that she and I made out at the party and gave me a whole lot more credit than I was expecting. Not that I mind making out, but I’m picky.” 
“Picky how?” You asked, words leaving your mouth before you even had the chance to think them over. 
“Picky as in there’s really only one person I’ve even wanted to kiss since I got here but haven’t got the chance to. I’m hoping they come to the booth. Just so I’ll get to know what that’s like.” 
You felt a subtle twist of something in your chest, though you weren’t sure what to make of it. Of course he had his eye on somebody. It was bound to happen eventually. 
“Why are you making a booth to do mass kissing then?” A valid follow up question. A guy like him could successfully pull whenever he wanted to. 
“Because I’m an opportunist,” he sighed, “And I’m not even sure if I can make a move properly. I don’t function like I normally do when they’re around.” 
“Of course you can. Anybody would say yes to you, Tooru.” 
With this, something in him seemed to snap and he immediately pulled you closer, your faces just an inch apart. His hands were firm around your waist, and the sensation was nearly searing. You could feel everything, from his hands to his breath to even the way his eyes seemed to scan your face. 
The way he looked at you now was like worship. 
“What are you doing?” You whispered shakily. With him all around you you could barely breathe, let alone think. 
“Making a move.” His eyes were on your lips. His hand gently left your waist to skim your arm before placing a hand on your cheek. “May I?” 
Your nod was nearly imperceptible before he captured your lips in yours. 
Soft, was your first thought as you felt his lips brush yours ever so lightly. You leaned into him, relishing the vaguely sweet taste of strawberry Chapstick on his lips as you swiped your tongue over his lips. 
Oikawa Tooru was a mystic. His fingers tangled in your hair and his lips searched for yours as if he was a lost man and you were his savior. He traced the curve of your waist and kissed you passionately, nibbling your lips when you pulled at his shirt. 
You could kiss him forever. You moved to nip at the tip of his ear, and his shaky breath had you considering if you should bite down harder. He pulled you back in and you melted into the feel of his lips and hands and the way his touch seemed to awaken something inside you. 
The way he held you was reverent. 
When you finally split for air, Oikawa held you close, his smile never wavering. He rubbed a thumb across your cheek, and placed a chaste kiss on your forehead. 
“That was magical,” you murmured into his shirt, and you couldn’t help but feel the slightest bit happy to hear the laugh you liked so much. 
You reckoned you’d be able to put together a solid design after tonight.
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Oikawa had a skip in his step the following morning. He’d aced every assessment, finished all his homework, and made major breakthroughs at practice. His sets to Bokuto were so flawless that Bokuto could hardly believe he’d made those shots. 
Everyone on the volleyball team was certain that something had happened, but Oikawa refused to let up. 
He didn’t kiss and tell after all. 
“What is up with you?” Iwaizumi asked good-naturedly, tipping back a water bottle. “You’ve been in a surprisingly good mood all morning.” 
“It’s been a good day,” Oikawa smiled, offering no other details while picking up a few stray balls on the court. The gym floor seemed exceptionally shiny today. He’d be sure to thank whoever waxed the floor for their services when he could. 
“Something definitely happened.” Kuroo chimed in, scrutinizing Oikawa like he was something under a microscope. “The question is what.” 
“Am I not allowed to have good days?” 
“No you are,” Kuroo smirked, “But a day this good only happens after a sudden surge in popularity which —last time I checked— didn’t happen, or……did you make some breakthrough?” 
“With my sets, yes.” 
“No,” Kuroo smiled knowingly. “I’m gonna curse them out for not telling me anything.” 
Oikawa hid his surprise with a flash of indifference, though internally he cursed the middle blocker. It seemed that he was just as good at reading people as he was at read blocking. 
Iwaizumi caught on almost immediately, casting his eyes to his longtime friend, who all of a sudden, was acting like a deer in headlights. He found it odd that the nature of your relationship with Oikawa had transformed seemingly overnight. 
It seemed that you never truly harbored any resentment against him. 
Still, he resolved to approach you about it as soon as he could. 
The minute that you walked through the gym’s double doors, the entire team thought that they’d summoned you with all the prying they were doing. You hauled something large through the door and placed it against the wall, proud of yourself for the herculean effort it took to bring it through. 
The minute he registered your presence, Oikawa’s face looked like a puff of cotton candy. His cheeks were rosy with all the teasing and the memories of last night, and when he saw what it was that you’d leaned against the wall, he thought he should run over and kiss you out of pride. 
“Good morning guys,” you beamed, a smile so radiant that Oikawa had suddenly lost all the focus he’d had all morning. 
“Morning Y/N,” Iwaizumi greeted, walking over to greet you with a hug and a slight gesture to the object that was now leaning against the wall. “Is this it?” 
You nodded excitedly. “I got the inspiration to put it together last night. I think it captures the magic of the booth.” 
Iwaizumi leaned to flip over the posterboard and decided that he’d never seen anything more fitting in his entire life. 
The sign was a pastel wonder, a pale blue at the bottom and moving to a light pink at the top. Across the poster were small and light volleyballs, somewhat transparent against the background as if the pattern was a part of it. The borders of the poster were filled with various lip prints (and even funnier, some hidden Chapsticks).
The font at the center was a far cry from the scrawling archaic font that Kuroo had used on their initial flyers. It was a simple block font, a shade of pink with a glow filter and a pattern that made it look like a light-up sign on the part that really mattered.
The Volleyball Club presents, the poster read, written in a smaller font. Right below that, the light up letters spelled out The Mystic Kissbooth. Help kiss us to greatness. 
The team crowded around the board, marveling at both its quality and its thoughtfulness. 
“Y/N….” Bokuto trailed off, his eyes nearly bursting with amazement, “This is crazy!” 
“Yeah,” Semi added, “This is ridiculously good. Kuroo, where the hell have you been keeping them.” 
Kuroo simply crossed his arms and smiled with pride. He’d always believed in you. 
Oikawa stood shell-shocked at your work, feeling all the days of preparation finally coming together. He looked at you and smiled a smile so genuine, you were glad you’d finally pulled through. 
You looked to the floor bashfully for a moment before meeting the team’s eyes with renewed confidence. “Thank you. I’m glad to help.” 
Iwaizumi stood at your side, smiling fondly at you before turning his gaze to Oikawa. “Hey. Oikawa. What is the deal with the de-stress carnival? When is it, where is it, and where are we setting up?” 
Oikawa, still elated, looked around the gym at the team. “If you want details, I think we should call another meeting.” 
”That is a great idea,” you chimed in. 
“Wanna join?” Oikawa asked (hopefully). 
”I’m sorry, I don’t think I can. I’ve got a date with Kiyoko.” 
The team went silent. “You have a what?!”
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The evening hues only made Kiyoko more beautiful. She was dressed casually, wearing classic blue jeans, a tank top, and a cardigan that only accentuated her figure. When she saw you approaching her, a smile appeared on her face instantaneously. 
“Y/N!” She greeted, “It’s good to see you.” 
You jogged up to her and pulled her into a friendly hug. “It’s good to see you too!”
You and Kiyoko fell into step naturally, opting to have dinner at one of your favorite places outside of campus. It was a quick walk from where you’d chosen to meet up, and in such good weather, it was a crime not to spend more time together. 
“I have a lot to tell you about,” Kiyoko began, “Starting with Oikawa Tooru. He showed up in my room and asked for the host. He’s got to know it’s me right?” 
“Yeah,” you nodded, “I know you use a modulator to stay under wraps so people take the podcast seriously, but he’s had a very good track record for being perceptive.” 
“That’s a pain” she sighed, “I hope he’s not going to spread it around.” 
“He won’t,” you assured her, “Oikawa can understand rumors better than anyone.” 
Kiyoko smiled relievedly, though she raised a brow at the mention of rumors. “Are those true?” 
You fought the heat that seemed to emerge onto your face the minute she mentioned that. You just hoped it would go unnoticed by her. 
Her blue eyes, unfortunately, were just as perceptive as they were pretty. 
She smirked, crossing her arms and stopping on the sidewalk path. “When did that happen?” 
“Don’t worry about it. Let’s keep walking.” You wish your voice had come out more strongly than a murmur. 
“When?” 
“Last night.” Damn Kiyoko for getting answers out of you. 
“And…?” She raised her brows expectantly. 
“Rumors are baseless but I confirm them. He is magical.” 
“I ought to say something about that,” she giggled, and you wanted to bury yourself into your hands to avoid her teasing. 
“Shush.” 
The two of you had a lovely dinner and opted to grab a quick drink from the speciality beverage store next door. Kiyoko grabbed a strawberry milkshake and you opted for a tropical fruit floater that they’d just created. Thanks to Kiyoko, both drinks were on the house. 
She nursed the straw between her lips and took a drag of her milkshake before meeting your eyes. “I have some information on the de-stress carnival.” 
You urged her to continue, and Kiyoko did. 
“Looks like Oikawa and the other members of clubs decided to officially name it the Cool Down Carnival. They’re just going to refer to it as Cool Down for ease. They’re planning to organize it the Saturday after midterms and they’ve been working on concessions like cotton candy, caramel apples, popcorn, and a whole boatload of stuff. Administration is also totally fine with this.” 
“Wow,” was all you could say as a response. You were honestly impressed with Oikawa. He put so much thought and care into a silly rumor that had transformed into one of the school’s biggest upcoming events. He was an alchemist of opportunities, taking a rumor of lead and transforming it to gold. 
“Yeah,” Kiyoko nodded, “I’ll get social media to cover it for me. So far, nobody doubts that I’m the manager of the ‘Cast, so it should be fairly reasonable for me to do.” 
“Out of curiosity, do you know anything about how they’re planning to do the shifts of the booth?” 
“All I know for certain is that Oikawa said he probably wasn’t gonna do a headlining shift…or a shift at all. A lot of the other members were perfectly fine with taking this on, but there has been some backlash.” 
He was planning on not headlining the booth?
Your heart was suddenly very warm and fuzzy in your chest. 
Kiyoko knowingly smiled at you before tipping at the front register and dragging you outside. The breeze was oddly pleasant, something a bit uncommon for this time of year. It was approaching colder weather, but it felt nearly spring-like. 
“The weather isn’t making sense,” you said, enjoying the feeling of freedom that came with nighttime out. 
“It hasn’t been making sense,” Kiyoko smiled, “We’re anticipating a fresh fair.” 
Springs and falls blended together. You found a beautiful leaf on the sidewalk and pressed it to your palm, preserving the feel and look in your memory. 
“I’m looking forward to it,” you’d finally tell Kiyoko as you parted ways, meaning each and every word.
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When Oikawa had showed up at your doorstep in the morning, your sleep-addled brain could barely fathom the reason as to why he would do such a thing. 
That was, until he walked into your room carrying breakfast in a brown bag. 
“Good morning Y/N.” He said, voice still slightly raspy from a good night of sleep. (You weren’t going to forget how that sounded forever). 
You greeted him with a morning greeting of your own and sat on your bed, stretching your limbs and analyzing the boy who—at this present moment—seemed like the happiest guy on earth. 
“Feel free to help yourself,” Oikawa grinned, grabbing a bagel and a pack of cream cheese from the bag. “I have some updates for you.” 
“Does it have to do with the Cool Down?” You walked over to the bag and grabbed something you liked from the inside. 
“Wow. How did you know about the name?” 
“I have my sources,” you winked. 
Oikawa simply laughed. “I know it’s Kiyoko dumbass. She’s one of the sneakiest podcast hosts of all time.” 
“So you do know.” 
“Obviously.” Oikawa lounged on the chair in your corner. “Nobody else is ever working in that office. She should get some people to join her.” 
You nodded and shifted to sit next to him on the couch. His warmth was a surprisingly pleasant addition into the morning, and you found yourself leaning into him. He didn’t make any move to stop it, opting to pull you in and place his arm over you. 
“We have classes soon,” you said groggily, “But I don’t want to move.” 
“We don’t have to right now.” 
“Thanks Tooru.” 
“Of course, Y/N.” He smiled. “Though we do have an afternoon meeting on how to divide the shifts. I’m not sure what we’re going to be doing about me.” 
You suddenly felt a lot more awake. You shifted your weight onto your unsupported arm and looked up at Oikawa. “Are you planning to take a shift?” 
Oikawa shifted nervously in his seat. “I’m not sure. I may have to for the sake of demand. Everyone is expecting me to live up to the expectation. I think we would be less successful without my involvement.” 
You felt a twist of something. Not jealously, but not comfort either. Something between the two. You rose away from Oikawa, walking over to the opposite side of the room where your bed was and met his eyes. 
“Do you really have to?” you asked, feeling partially unfair. There was nothing official between the two of you at the moment, but you’d thought after the kiss two nights ago…..you thought you had a chance. 
“I might,” he gulped, “But you know you’re the only one I’ve ever wanted to kiss.” 
You sighed exasperatedly. “I know that you came up with this as a business opportunity and because you thought we’d never…get anywhere, but a long shift is going to be a lot of people.” 
“I know,” he sighed, meeting your eyes with an expression in his own that looked a lot like sadness. “But the fundraiser might just have to come first for now— no that’s not what I—“ 
“Please leave,” you said, voice wavering a bit, “I don’t want to deal with the whole priorities thing right now. We can say we kissed once for fun. Headline it if you must. Later Oikawa.” 
You turned away from him and walked towards your closet to find appropriate clothes for the day. You couldn’t even stand to look at him right now. Things would become too complicated for you to handle. 
“Y/N, I’m really sorry.” Oikawa said from behind you, “That is genuinely not what I meant.” 
You turned to face him again, not even able to meet his eyes. “There’s got to be some semblance of truth in what you said earlier. You love your team Oikawa. They are important. I don’t expect you to throw away opportunities for me. We’re not even dating.” You laughed dryly. “I’d like a bit of space. We can talk a bit later.” 
Oikawa seemed like he had a lot more to say, but he wordlessly slipped out of the door, leaving your room noticeably empty. 
Once he’d left for certain, you collapsed onto the floor and let loose the dam of tears you’d held in for so long.
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When Iwaizumi found you in the library, he knew immediately that something was wrong. Your eyes were reddened ever so slightly, covered over by a splash of cold water to the face (most likely), and your usual cheerfulness when you greeted him was a lot less lively. 
He took the seat beside you, surprised by your lack of response. 
”Hajime,” you said softly, turning over to smile sadly at him, “Good to see you here.” 
Correction: something was horrifically wrong. 
“What happened?” He asked softly, wondering what was enough to dampen your normally resilient spirit.  
“Fucking Oikawa,” you laughed sarcastically, “Look at me saying I’d never get caught up in his web, and then doing exactly that.” 
Iwaizumi wrinkled his brow. That day on the bench, he’d known enough to discern that you and Oikawa had some sort of history. That much continued to be made obvious by Oikawa’s constant urge to see you and include you in everything that he and Kuroo didn’t think was important enough to invite you to. 
However, he wasn’t sure when you and Oikawa became more than a past set of acquaintances….and that stung a little. He understood your reasoning though. Especially if it was as complicated as you seemed to feel at the moment. 
“Were you guys dating?”
“No.” You turned to face him in full, and he was struck by the magnitude of just how magnetic you were. Iwaizumi was guilty of being stuck in your orbit. “Just a kiss. Because he sweet talked me into thinking he wanted something.”
“Knowing him, he probably did.” Iwaizumi said, “Oikawa has a tendency to be obsessive to get what he wants, but also be blinded by obligations. This was definitely about him headlining the booth, right?” 
You nodded, feeling a sudden tightness in your throat at the thought. You weren’t ready to confront the morning’s events quite yet. 
“That dumbass,” Iwaizumi groaned, “If he’d told us that he liked you and had actually managed to make a move we would’ve gladly taken his shift! Who gives a fuck about what the college body wants? Half of them thirst over everyone!” You laughed a bit at the truth of that statement. “Yeah, and Kiyoko told me she was also planning on making a little appearance.” 
At this Iwaizumi raised his brow. “Oh that’s about to be carnage.” 
“Absolutely,” you giggled, “Who knows? Maybe you’ll be the lucky person.” Iwaizumi laughed, a sound that was low and sweet and comforting. “I think I’ll leave it to some of the other boys. They deserve a chance after all.” 
The two of you grinned at the mental imagery of the team fighting for a chance to interact with your beautiful friend, and suddenly, Oikawa’s shittiness seemed like something far less relevant. 
Still, even with the humor of the situation came the very uncomfortable realization that you and Oikawa–-whatever you were–-were done if you didn’t come to some consensus. 
You shoved your hands into your face, wondering how the hell you’d managed to go from avoidant and unattached to too attached. Maybe the rumors had some merit. A kiss from Oikawa was all that it took to get so jumbled. 
Iwaizumi’s warm palm on your back was what brought you back to your senses. He rubbed his slow circles and sat there patiently until you emerged from your cover of shame. 
“What am I going to do?” you asked, voice raw and vulnerable and everything you’d rather it not have been. 
“Whatever you want to do.” Iwaizumi’s gaze was genuine, soft eyes studying you. “You’re entitled to your own decisions. Kuroo and I would never ditch you for Shitty you know.” 
“It’s for the team,” you whispered, feeling tears threatening to spill over your cheeks. Your vision was hazy, and you blinked slowly to clear the water from your eyes. “So then why do I feel like this?” 
“Because you care about him, Y/N.” Iwaizumi squeezed your shoulder affectionately, “You and him clearly bonded on some intergalactic level, so having that be suddenly shattered in favor of something seemingly less important is going to feel like shit. In fact, he is the real piece of crap here.” “The team matters.” “The team is all about relationships.” Iwaizumi said firmly. “I have a hunch there’s someone in this tournament that he needs to beat. That’s why he’s been obsessively orchestrating the perfect way to raise money to have a practice match beforehand. Still, I won’t deny it. Oikawa is an idiot for doing this to you. You have all the rights to move on with your life.” 
“I think I’m gonna take my space from him for a few days,” you eventually responded. “I think I’ll also not visit the booth. I’ll give Kuroo the sign in advance so he can help with setting up?” 
Iwaizumi nodded solemnly. “If that’s what you need to do, I’ll be your number one supporter. I’d still love it if you could stop by though. We love having you around.” 
You nodded at him. “I’ll be there for you and Kuroo. Always. And you guys can hang out with me at the Cool Down when you’re off shift.” 
“Of course,” Iwaizumi smiled, “For you? Anything.”
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“How do you say, ‘I’m angry’ in French?” The ping of the recording microphone tapped on as Oikawa paced quickly around his room. 
“Je suis fâché.” 
“How do you say, ‘I like to go out with my friends’ in French?” “J’aime sortir avec mes amis.” 
“How do you say, ‘I went to my friend’s house’ in French?” 
“Je ne veux pas continuer.” 
“Oui Monsieur. À Bientôt!” His phone’s recording feature switched off, leaving him in a silent room once again. 
He was regretful, so much so that he paced around in his room in the hopes that it would give him some sort of clarity. As much as he wanted to approach you, he knew you weren’t ready to talk to him right now. 
“Shittykawa,” he heard from his door, opening with a subtlety and closing with a bang. Classic Iwa move. 
He turned to face his best friend, who at this moment, seemed to be quite irritated with him. He could feel the lecture as certain as one could feel a thunderstorm in the air. 
Iwaizumi stood, arms crossed in Oikawa’s room, leaning against the wall and pinning him with a look so strong it might as well have been a thumbtack. Oikawa felt rooted in place, and all the words he initially planned on saying left his mouth. 
“So Ushijima Wakatoshi happens to be at a school just a bit over,” Iwa started, “I did my research. Why not play a practice match with them to start to see their setting style? Break down their setter, practice receiving from a left-handed person, and maybe we can beat him, right?” 
Oikawa sighed, feeling all the fight leave his body. He made his way over to his pale blue rug and sat down. “I know. It’s ridiculous.” 
“What’s ridiculous is what you did to Y/N.” Iwaizumi glared at him. “If you’d said something about liking them and actually successfully getting them to like you, then we would’ve been perfectly capable of handling the shifts. Hell, even Kiyoko is coming. That alone will give people incentive to come and kiss us.” 
“I made a mistake,” Oikawa cringed. He didn’t even want to think about the morning. What was intended to be a romantic gesture ended up being a horrible memory. His attempts to distract himself were futile, and he couldn’t help but wonder how Iwaizumi had found you. “But they probably don’t want to talk to me.” 
Iwaizumi looked at Oikawa sadly. “They’re planning on skipping the booth. They’ve already decided to give their poster to Kuroo so he can help us with set-up. So don’t plan on seeing them.” 
He grimaced. “Not coming? Really?” 
Iwaizumi nodded. “I was pretty unhappy about it, but we’ve got to give them space to process everything.” The minute you’d smiled at him in the airport, talking about “college stampedes,” Oikawa knew he wanted nothing more but to know you better. He’d thanked every lucky star for the seats you had next to each other and relished every moment spent with you. 
He wondered why you avoided him for the next months, always daydreaming about what he’d say to you when you finally reappeared at practices. He’d searched for you in your classes, but he always missed you. 
When you walked into the gym on that fateful day, he thought he had a genuine chance. You were perfect. Your thoughts were exquisite, your smile radiant, and everything about you felt right. When he kissed you, he could’ve screamed to the heavens that his heart was yours. 
Perhaps that was why his heart seemed to tear a bit at Iwaizumi’s declaration. You wanted to move on from this. 
“Oikawa…you can still fix this you know?” Iwaizumi pulled him up from the rug, noting the reignited spark in his eyes. “You should probably get the fair set up, find Y/N, and explain yourself. I’m certain they’ll understand.” 
“It’s the least I can do,” he said solemnly, “And if they still decide they want nothing to do with me, at least I did my part.”
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You found him at Kuroo’s place at night when you’d stepped through his door uninvited (like you did at times). In your hands was your laptop, a few pencils, and the sign you’d made for the booth. The last thing you’d expected was to see the person you’d been trying so desperately to avoid. 
Oikawa, for a moment, looked like he’d seen a ghost. He looked at the door, brown eyes concerned and scanning you as if you’d just walked in through the wall. 
Nobody said anything. You stood still, too shell-shocked to process the fact that a night before the Cool Down, Oikawa was spending time with Kuroo. In fact, you could barely believe Kuroo had ever allowed Oikawa into his place in the first place, especially when he knew that you were planning on popping in at some point. 
Kuroo’s eyes followed your gaze, finding it landing right on the floor next to Oikawa (as opposed to straight at him). 
“Well,” Kuroo began softly, “I didn’t warn either of you.” 
“You could have,” you said, looking back at Kuroo, “I would’ve liked to know before I got here.” “But then you would have never showed up.” Oikawa’s voice was clear, slicing through the silence of the room with a blade of decisiveness that you hadn’t heard from him. He looked you over, seemingly analyzing your health since the day he’d fucked up. 
“I wasn’t planning on running into you,” you admitted, finding the courage to meet his eyes. “In fact, I was literally just coming to drop off the sign for your booth, talk to my best friend, and then go to bed.” 
“Please let me explain myself.” Everything about Oikawa seemed pleading. His face harbored an expression of guilt so boundless that you weren’t sure how to react. 
You wordlessly sat down in the corner chair closest to Kuroo’s door, setting your stuff down on the surface closest to it. 
“I’m sure Iwaizumi must have told you what it was that we were raising money for.” 
You nodded.
“I never had the chance to tell you more about what I struggled with in high school," Oikawa said quietly. “I was surrounded by talented players. Some of them are so talented that I thought I never even stood a chance.  I realized at the end of my matches that I deserved to be on the court just as much as anyone else.” 
“You’re a damn good setter Oikawa,” Kuroo interjected, “And even Semi admires your sets. He’s from the same school as Ushijima too.”
“Thank you,” Oikawa laughed softly, but even the sound was sad. He turned to meet your eyes. “I was out of line trying to say the volleyball club mattered more to me than what we were getting to be. I was worried they’d be weird at me for flaking, but they’re my team. Iwa told me they’d always have my back. Happy setter happy tosses right?” 
You took a moment to process everything that he was saying, ultimately coming to one conclusion. He really did feel bad. 
“Why are you so obsessed with having a chance to beat someone you had a rivalry with in highschool?” 
Oikawa paused, contemplating your question. His brow was furrowed, and his hands clutched anxiously around nothing, seemingly finding the best words to phrase—whatever it was—that he was feeling. 
“It was to give myself the confidence to know I can still beat tough opponents,” he said quietly. “But it was never worth losing you.” 
You gently moved onto the floor, kneeling your way over to where Oikawa sat. When your fingertips skimmed his cheek, cool from the fall time air, he seemed fragile. 
You gently curved your fingers to tuck a lock of his hair behind his ear. “Are you sure you mean it?” 
“Every last word.” Oikawa whispers, and maybe against your better instincts, you pull him into an embrace.
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As far as Oikawa was concerned, you weren’t coming to the booth today. 
Cool Down’s set up began bright and early, and despite last night’s emotional clarity, Kuroo was still the one who showed up with the sign. 
The booth was placed in a central location, but deep enough into the carnival so that after a sweet kiss, everyone could go and support the other clubs. He hadn’t been able to spot Kiyoko quite yet, but he was certain they were bound to cross paths eventually. 
He walked across the grassy area where the carnival was being set up, watching the glorious “Cool Down” sign being placed at the front of the admit area. Many sports teams and board members of academic clubs were helping organize their own booths. 
“Hey Oikawa! I can put up the banner!” Bokuto shouted from across the field, jogging up to their area with a rolled up “Mystic Kissbooth” backdrop. 
“Be careful!” He yelled back, “We can’t have one of our best spikers getting hurt. I need those cross court and straight shots in perfect condition!” 
Bokuto grinned so widely that Oikawa couldn’t help but grin back. “You can count on me!” 
He took a moment to slouch against the now filled bouncy castle by their stand, clutching his clipboard to his chest. He could practically sense the excitement seeping into the space as the nearby club members set up their stands. 
He’d had the opportunity to survey the space beforehand, and was quite pleased with the nearby stations. 
The art club created a paint gun bullseye game to win handmade trinkets and jewelry. The president stood proudly at the set up side, excitedly loading up paint into the guns. He could already predict the boyfriends who’d attempt to win there.
To the other side of them was the statistics club’s probability stand. They’d set up numerous games: cards, a wheel, and even ring toss for the chance to win huge prizes. At the present moment, Kuroo was inquiring about the legitimacy of the airpods in one of the member’s hands (and yes—they were legit). 
“This is pretty amazing, huh?” 
Oikawa snapped out of his reverie, only to see Mattsun sporting his classic smirk. He looked around for Makki, but didn’t find him. 
“Yeah,” he admitted, “I’m honestly surprised our little flier accomplished this much.” 
“I’m not,” Mattsun chuckled, “You’ve been like this since high school Oikawa. Everyone here is really grateful for the rumors. Speaking of which…think the culprit is going to show up today?” 
Oikawa snorted, momentarily horrified at the sound 
that escaped him. “That’s ridiculous. I’m not planning on being a headliner. Iwa’s got that covered.” 
Makki walked into view just a few moments later, looking thoroughly confused. “Where’s the rest of the team?” 
Kuroo walked over at the exact moment, clapping Makki on the back. “We decided to give them a little break, considering they’re going to be doing all the kissing later.” 
The group gathered together, and Mattsun pointed to the castle. “Who’s running this thing?” 
“Oh it’s just a free fun thing the school is putting up.” Oikawa smacked it for good measure. 
“How did midterms even go for you guys?” Kuroo laughed, “I pulled what I wanted in all my classes. Somehow. Orgo was a fucking miracle though. I genuinely thought I failed.”
“I was mostly fine,” Mattsun chuckled, “Though we won’t talk about history. Freaking liberal arts.” 
Oikawa’s midterms had gone more or less to plan, but the added emotional stress had made it much more difficult to keep cool. 
Standing there in that grassy field, he felt more at peace than he did the rest of the week. 
Maybe today would be okay after all.
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You and Iwaizumi were in your room trying to devise a plan on how to attend the carnival. The cool wood of your desk hit your wrist as you spread out the makeshift blueprint of the event that Kiyoko had so graciously given you. 
Iwaizumi paced along the floor, inspecting outfits that you picked out while you devised a mental list of everywhere you wanted to go to maximize your enjoyment. Economic principles were literally designed off of utility, and you wanted to make sure all your contributions would have the best outcome for the clubs and yourself. 
Midterms had been stressful, and while last night’s talk had fixed most of what had contributed to that stress, you still wondered about Oikawa.  
Iwaizumi was the event’s new headliner, so what did that mean for Oikawa? 
You weren’t sure. 
The Saturday morning filled your room with sunshine that was comforting. From your window you were greeted with the multicolored leaves of campus, some floating down leisurely to hit the grass. 
Iwaizumi, it seemed, had finally picked your outfit. 
“Here,” he gestured, pointing to one of your favorites. “You rock this one.” 
“Why thank you,” you smiled, tossing him the blueprint. “I’ve finally figured out the order I’m going to tour the Cool Down.”
Iwaizumi caught the paper in one arm, muscles flexing ever so slightly as he did. You nodded appreciatively. He was going to generate a shit ton of money. 
He put a pen between his lips ever so slightly as he read the marks on the page. “Cotton candy. Art booth. Bouncy castle. Stats games. Chemistry lab. Apple dunk to win candy apples. Physics coaster.” He handed the page back. “That’s a pretty solid list. I think you’re missing something though.”
You pulled the pen out of Iwa’s mouth (surprised at your boldness) and smiled gently at him. “I’ll be sure to pop in at some point or be nearby to support you.” 
Iwaizumi nodded, “Of course. I just need to beat you at any and all games we visit after my shift.” 
You snickered. “Not a chance.” 
Iwaizumi simply smirked in response.
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“Hey, I need two tickets!” A student hollered to her assistant, who at the present moment, was working on acquiring more admit tickets from the roll they’d customized for the event. “We have quite the line here.” 
“I’m working on it!” The assistant hollered back, jogging over with the entire row. 
The line for the Cool Down was large, and you were thankful you’d had the foresight to arrive early enough to avoid a majority of the crowd. Being friends with Iwa had its perks too–the minute that the admitting team had spotted him, they’d immediately ushered you to the front so you were in a position to visit him later. 
Soon enough, you were at the front of the line. 
“Well hello there friend of Iwaizumi,” the girl at the front smiled, “How many tickets do you need?” “Just one,” you said, surprised at the lack of prompt to pay the entrance fee. “What about the entrance fee?” 
“Oh, Iwaizumi took care of that already,” the assistant grinned, handing you a beautifully designed cardstock ticket and tying a wristband around your wrist. “So you can walk straight in.” 
You smiled graciously at the duo. “Wow. I’ll go find him and pay him back. Thank you guys.”
Stepping around the ticket distribution center, you walked straight through the decorated entrance area and walked in. 
For a moment, you were awestruck. The usually empty grass fields were filled to the brim with activity. All around you were the booths of various clubs, all with lines to try them out. You could smell the sweet and tart scent of caramel apples in the distance, and saw a couple trying out the physics club’s make-shift coaster with a cotton candy in their hands. 
The late afternoon was brisk and fresh, and you felt the possibilities of the evening unfurl around you. As the sky darkened its hues, the fair would begin to light up from the fixtures that trimmed everyone’s areas. Everything, from the food areas, to even the Mystic Kissbooth would create a movie-like scene. 
You decided right there and then that the Cool Down was the best fair you’d ever attended. You’d never seen anything as well thought out as what you saw today. 
You made your way to the popcorn area, finding new booths that you hadn’t seen on the blueprint. In front of you was a simple dart-throw, with the guarantee of winning a special edition Cool Down shirt if you hit within a certain range. 
This was intriguing. 
“Hi there,” you said quietly, walking up to the booth. “Can I give this a whirl?” The booth’s president looked up at you shocked for a moment before nodding. 
“Of course!” He said excitedly, elbowing his shift mate. “Y/L/N Y/N, right? We are huge fans of your work. Kuroo has told us so so much about you!” 
“My work?” You asked curiously as they pressed a dart into your palm. “Like my fliers?” “Hell yeah,” the president grinned. “Pay if you win okay? I honestly want you to get our design out of it. We were inspired a bit by your Mystic Kissbooth sign.” 
In the spirit of good fun, you aimed the dart as best as you could, so surprised when you hit a spot very close to the bulls-eye. 
“Hey!” you shouted excitedly, “I actually got in range!” The president smiled excitedly. “Amazing! What’s your shirt size?” You told him your size, tucking a good amount of money into the jar. As soon as the soft shirt fabric hit your hands, you were immediately overcome with a sense of pride. The design was beautiful and simple, capturing the essence in the fair in just an image.
“You’re the design club?” You grinned, “This is amazing!” “Ah thank you,” the president said bashfully, “It’s an honor to get a compliment from you. You’re more than welcome to join us. Canva art is still art we love.” 
“I’ll be sure to consider it!” You waved goodbye to the design booth as you made your way deeper into the fair, a t-shirt in hand. 
“Hey there! Want a chance to win a cool plushie? Come right over!” You turned your head to be met with the sewing club with something that looked a lot like “Bop-It” set up with sheets of papers next to them. Out of sheer curiosity you made your way to the booth, finding a larger crowd than you anticipated. “Okay,” one of the members began, “Here is how this works. You and your competitor will receive a pre-programmed Bop-It machine. Follow the color scheme as closely as you can and note the last color in each sequence on your sheet. If you don’t mess up before your partner, you win ANY handmade plush of your choice!” In front of you, you spotted a couple tucking money into the jar and competing against one another. The round was quick, ending when someone clicked the wrong color. The handmade plushie of the winner was adorable. 
Somehow, all your observations had led you to the front of the line. 
“Hello,” a student smiled, “Do you have a competitor with you?” You were about to share a response when you heard a voice behind you. “Yeah, they do. I’d like to play please.” You were pleasantly surprised to find Kiyoko grinning as she tucked a hefty amount into the jar. The student at the front seemed enamored, and so did the entire line. 
“Shimizu Kiyoko is here…” they all whispered. 
“Hey Kiyoko,” you smiled, placing your own money in the jar. “Planning to beat me?” 
“Of course.” She grinned mischievously, “I ran a volleyball team. I am competitive enough to beat you.” 
The game began as soon as the students got a grip of themselves. You frantically hit the colors and noted them down, only to tie with Kiyoko. You’d both walked away with adorable plushies, though Kiyoko had forcibly had to ensure that they didn’t hand her an extra. 
“I’m glad to run into you,” you smiled, walking with her further into the grass. “I had no idea what time you were planning to get here.” 
“I’m glad I found you.” Her smile was infectious, and soon enough, you stood in front of a candy apple stand. 
“Are you planning to visit the booth?” You asked her, watching her pay for her apple. 
“Yeah,” she smiled, “Oikawa begged me to cover, so I was feeling nice. Though he’s been sulking lately.” You raised a brow. When you saw him last night, you could feel his fatigue. You felt the stress melt out of him when you pulled him in for a hug, but you hadn’t realized the extent of his distress. 
“He hasn’t kissed today at all,” she smiled knowingly, “I think he’s saving an appearance for a special someone.” “He’s….not headlining?” You were shocked. After everything, it seemed that he really meant what he said. 
“Nope,” Kiyoko wiped some caramel from her lips. “And the booth’s sales have been spectacular.” 
Standing there in the field, you were hit with the intense urge to see him. “Go,” Kiyoko smiled, “They’ve been waiting for you to show up.” “We’ll catch up.” You smiled as you took off in a jog towards the booth. The wind swept your cheeks as you ran, and you could see the evening sun dip into different colors. Beautiful, you thought, feeling the adrenaline pump through your veins. 
He really had meant everything. You needed to see him. 
When you arrived at the booth, you were shocked at the line. So many students lined up, money in hand as they waited for their chance to kiss a volleyball player. You were shocked to see the crowd, watching someone hand Semi a particularly large bill before leaning in for a kiss. 
You surveyed the booth for Oikawa, but you couldn’t find him anywhere. You couldn’t stop the thrum of your heart in your chest from overpowering your senses. Where was he? What if you were too late? At that particular moment, Oikawa walked out from behind the stand, putting some Chapstick onto his lips. And then, he saw you. 
You stood in line, a large bill in hand and an expression that seemed almost desperate. Oikawa has never seen anyone look more perfect than you did right now. You held a handmade plushie and a shirt, lips flushed from biting them. 
You met his eyes, feeling your heart shock at the sensation. There he was. 
Before you even had a chance to think about what you were doing, you ran out of line to him, shoving the bill into his hands. 
“Tooru,” you said breathlessly, looking at him with an expression he’d never seen before. “Kiyoko told me you weren’t headlining. I was afraid I wasn’t going to find you. I’m sorry for not trusting you.” Oikawa could hardly hide his shock as the words tumbled from your lips. He studied your cheeks, and smoothed out your wind mused hair with a soft smile. “Hey, it’s alright.” You exhaled, looking at him like he strung the stars. “I thought I wouldn’t make it in time.” Oikawa simply grinned before pulling you in for a passionate kiss. 
This was different from the last time you kissed. He cupped your face softly and wrapped his other arm around your waist, tracing a small heart into your back. You could feel the curve of his lips as he kissed you softly, pulling you deeper when you smiled back into it. Everything about this was soft, almost loving. It felt like a truce. It felt like a confession. 
It felt better than both of those things. When you finally split for air, his smile was nearly blinding. He looked at you like you were a poet and he was your poetry, a product of your purest affections. 
“Go out with me sometime?” He looked nervous, standing there like he hadn’t just kissed you like you were the most special person in the universe. 
“Of course,” you grinned, pulling him down for another kiss.
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©mysterystarz all rights reserved, please do not plagiarize, translate, or modify my fics in any way even if credited
if you got this far, thank you for reading <3!!
536 notes · View notes
i9messi · 11 months
Text
You belong with me — Charles Leclerc
You're Charles best friend and a famous singer. When he announces he is going to get married soon, people start to analyze your songs.
social media au
a/n: happy ending!! I got inspired by taylor's songs, I love her so much
charles' masterlist
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charles_leclerc
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she said yes 💍
liked by pierregasly, landonorris, arthur_leclerc and 693.183 others
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user1 no, I can't believe this. pls tell me isn't real
user2 you should marry y/n instead
user3 i'll cry myself to sleep
user4 our girl yourusername was meant to be your wife, not her
carlossainz55 congrats mate!
user5 you're team y/n and we all know it
yourusername I'm happy for you charless ❤️
user5 I'm so sad, i hope he regrets what he's doing
landonorris 😡😡 (comment deleted)
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yourusername
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new song will come out tomorrow, it's a little personal <3
liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc, yourbestfriend and 923.162 others
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user1 another song for charles??
user2 my girl need to express her feelings
user3 must be a sad song
user4 "it's a little personal" okay, that means this song will break my heart forever
landonorris I'm not ready for this
carlossainz55 either am I
charles_leclerc ❤️
user5 DON'T GET MARRIED
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NEWS! famous singer, Y/N, is in love with Charles Leclerc?
In her latest song You're losing me the singer and songwriter reveals some important details about her love-life.
read more...
You can also read!
Five songs of Y/N dedicated to Charles Leclerc.
landonorris
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do something, baby, say something tagged yourusername
liked by fernandoalo_oficial, yourusername, maxverstappen1 and 553.123 others
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user1 lando is us
user2 say something @/charlesleclerc
user3 three days and charles still haven't showed up. patience isn't my best quality
user4 @/charlesleclerc your best friend openly confessed in a song she's waiting for you to choose her
user5 I would marry her
landonorris me too
user6 Lando! I'm supposed to be team Charles
user5 user6 we can be team Lando too
carlossainz55 🧐🧐
maxverstappen1 I'll go and get some popcorn
pierresgasly this is good entertainment
NEWS! Leclerc and his fiancée ended their relationship?
Some sources confirmed what some fans were waiting for. Charles Leclerc is interested in his best friend, the famous singer?
Read the article.
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NEWS!
A month has passed and we’re all asking the same question, What happened between Leclerc and Y/L/N? Since the singer and songwriter has released her latest song, fans haven't stopped mentioning Charles Leclerc, her best friend. Leclerc has made no statement on the matter, nor of his future marriage (have they cancelled it?). Lando Norris and other Formula One drivers seem to be aware of the events, however the protagonist of our story has been inactive in his social media.
Some days ago, fans have met the Ferrari driver at Y/N concert. Does his presence mean they are still good friends or has he finally ended his relationship with his fiancée? Is Leclerc single now?
charles_leclerc
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I belong with you 🤍 tagged yourusername
liked by yourusername, landonorris, yourbestfriend and 2.983.123 others
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landonorris WAR IS OVER
carlossainz55 I KNEW IT
carlossainz55 IM NOT BLIND CHICOS
user1 THANK YOU CHARLES
user2 finally our boy realized who was there for him all the time
pierresgasly 🥹 I'm so proud of you
maxverstappen1 finally, what took you so long?
pierresgasly he was an idiot
fernandoalo_oficial I want free tickets for her show, please!
user3 the world healed
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sourbinnie · 11 months
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☆ regrets & replacements ☆ (2)
♡ genre ¿? ♡ -> angst with a hopeful ending ♡ pair ¿? ♡ -> hyung line!skz x gn!reader ♡ plot ¿? ♡ -> it's not about making up, it's about owning up to your mistakes. ♡ warnings ¿? ♡ -> swearing ♡ request ¿? ♡ -> yes!
a/n -> BEFORE YOU READ ; if you're expecting an angsty ending, this is not gonna please you but if you expected everything to be happy and good in the end, this isn't for you either. i really did try to write a part where they fully make up and i couldn't do it. i don't even if it's my angsty side kicking in or if it's just instinct where i just don't find it possible for that to happen. i also didn't feel like giving in and making it sad as hell because i got requested to do something happy and i'm sorry if i disappointed that person. i literally couldn't do it:( and i'm really sad with myself about this one, i would say this is a neutral ending and i'm gonna leave it at that.
first part -> hyung line
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chan ✉
waking up with no chan next to you was rare. your birthday was gone now but not your feelings and that sucked because that meant you would have to talk to chan about what happened. you didn't feel bad about not explaining it to him, you kinda hoped he already realized his mistake but even if he did it wouldn't change the course of things right now.
as you got up and walked to your living room, you saw the never ending pile of gifts. the flowers, the cake, the different things the boys got you and of course your boyfriend chan. he looked tired as hell, bags under his eyes and just overall the energy he usually had wasn't there. he looked at you and sighed when he saw the the reddish eyes from crying but he still had hope in him.
"you know getting me stuff won't make me forgive you that easily channie." you said and chan nodded as he heard your words. he wasn't doing this to earn your forgiveness, he knew he didn't deserve that in the end. but he still wanted you to have a birthday, even if the day had gone by, you deserved a celebration and he would leave if you asked him to because he just respected you that much.
"this isn't for you to forgive me even if i am so fucking sorry. this is because you deserved a good day yesterday and because your boyfriend's an idiot, he ruined that." he muttered and it was your time to nod as you listened to him. there was no easy way to forgive him really because what he did hurt you so deeply and this was beyond just forgetting.
"why did you do that chan? i mean i don't really expect you to always remember my birthday but i wasn't expecting to find out that you spend it with someone who deeply hates me." you explained and felt like you were going to cry again thinking about it. it wasn't fair to you and chan knew better than that, he didn't want to push it but he did want to fix things. losing you was not in his mind right now, he needed to make things right.
"when soohee called me yesterday i left without a comment because i truly was worried that something happened to her. it turned out she broke up with her boyfriend and whatever, begged me to stay with her and everything just went by so fucking fast. i didn't notice anything and i just-." he had to cut himself off because he knew he was rambling and he was desperate to make things okay but he was feeling so broken. thinking about you being all alone and waiting for him to come back was probably gonna haunt him and that made the tears build up in his eyes. "i know i don't deserve it (y/n) but please let me make it right."
you looked at him as you took in everything. you wanted to believe him because you knew chan and you knew how kind hearted he was when it came to his friends. you saw how he realized that soohee wasn't who he thought she was and it's hard losing a friend, you hated that this was all happening and felt absolutely betrayed but you were not heartless and chan crying always made you feel the worst way.
"channie, i don't know if i'm gonna be able to forgive you right now. but i would really like to spend the day with you because i missed you so much yesterday." you said and he could feel himself crying more but understanding. he was so scared that this was gonna be the end but he was given another chance. you got close to him and as soon as you were next to him, he wrapped his arms around you.
"i'll make it right, i promise." he mumbled through tears and you really hoped he would. drying the tears from his face with your thumb as you gave him a little kiss on the lips and he smiled again. it wasn't quite alright yet but the wound would heal eventually.
minho ✉
you knew it wasn't gonna be easy to go through the night all by yourself. of course you had your friends there but usually having minho by your side made things easier. jisung stayed by your side, disappointed in his friend and sad to witness the falling out but he was rooting for him to show up and make things right. the night was still young and he had been texting minho to come over even if you told him not to. jisung knew better though, he could read you and your eyes were always at the door.
when minho arrived at the place, he sighed deeply and prayed that he could fix this. the boys greeted him but jisung had a look on his face of "make this right" and it was scary. he wasn't the type to be afraid but if he did lose you today, that would be his biggest fear coming true and he didn't know what he would do without you.
he saw you looking as beautiful as ever out on the balcony. he had you all alone, he needed to talk and he needed to choose his words carefully before thinking of the worst.
"minho? i told you not to show up." you said but you didn't sound confident in your words. he could tell there was a mix of anger and sadness in your tone and it was all because of him, this wasn't going to be easy.
"i could not miss my partner's birthday even if i screwed up everything." he said and looked at you. you weren't even looking in his direction but he was captured by your beauty every time he glanced at you and it was beyond your outfit and how you did your hair. he got so lucky with you and knowing that this could be the last night he saw you would kill him slowly. "i can't lose you (y/n) and i know everything's beyond wrong right now but i just need you."
"i didn't feel bad that you forgot or even that you were with her of all people. but you lied to me and we've never had an instance where i felt like things were beyond repair but right now i just don't know what to say minho." you said and you didn't want to cry right now but it was all too much. he felt like crying himself as he saw those spill from your eyes because like you said, there wasn't a situation that you lived before where you guys wouldn't make up and he felt you slipping away from him.
"don't say that, i don't deserve you and i should've remembered in the first place. i choose someone who doesn't understand that i met the love of my life already and that i'm not gonna give up on them. i won't put you second ever again (y/n) and i know you probably won't believe me right now but i truly do mean it." he said confidently and you looked at him, meeting his honest eyes. "i lied i know and i thought i was making things better by keeping soohee away from everyone. i cut her off and i know i should've done it sooner."
you took his hand in yours as you looked down. he knew you did this when you were nervous, when you needed to hold or do something to distract you so he just let you. 
"i can't forgive you even if i want to because all i wanted was for you to show up and explain yourself." you said and it warmed his heart. even if he let you down, you always believed in him and will always wait for him. "minho i love you, would you give me time?"
"all the time you need, i'll be here waiting for you as long as it takes." he responded and even if it hurt that things went so wrong, there was a glimpse of hope in the end. "i love you more (y/n)." he then said and you kissed his cheek as you headed inside. 
changbin ✉
waking up to someone yelling over the phone wasn't really what you had in mind. you went to the living room where all the noise was coming from and you saw changbin looking as tired as he could be. you really didn't expect for him to stay in your apartment and for him to be mad was rare. 
"changbin what's going on?" you asked genuinely concerned because even if all the events from yesterday were on your mind, you cared too much about him to not be there if he needed you. on the other hand, changbin couldn't take that you still were looking at him with caring eyes, he deserved to be yelled at and deserved to be kicked out.
"i'm cutting someone out of my life and they didn't make it easy. as soon as they started insulting you, i had to say some things that were not quite nice but i don't regret it." he responded and you could imagine who he was talking about. it still surprised you that he did that because even if you hated her, you knew that changbin in the end cared about her but from how angry he was you could see there was no going back.
"you didn't have to do that changbin." you muttered and he was so sad to hear that, not because of soohee and cutting off their "friendship" but because you genuinely thought he shouldn't have defended you. "i mean it's not like you didn't go there yesterday and spent all day with her when she needed you."
"stop that right now. first of all, i know what i did and i'm always gonna be fucking sorry about not being here with you, celebrating your day and choosing someone who clearly wanted this to happen all along." changbin said and you were glad he was now finally realizing but you also felt like it was too late. "but i'm not gonna hear you say that you don't want me to defend you because i'm always gonna be choosing you even if you want me to go right now, you will always be the one for me. i'm genuinely serious (y/n), i don't want soohee and i'm never gonna want her because i am in love with you."
"and i'm always gonna be in love with you but it doesn't change the fact that you hurt me." you said and he nodded now getting what you meant and how you felt. there might no be going back from this one and he just wanted to disappear right then and there. 
"tell me what i can do to fix this. i'll do anything you want me to because i swear i can't live without you." he begged basically and you could hear his voice getting higher pitched. it wasn't common for him to cry and if you saw him cry, you would end up crying as well.
"binnie i don't know. this is not the end and i don't want you to leave, can we pretend for a while that yesterday didn't happen?" you said and he looks at you. his eyes filled with tears but he still finds the strength to hold on to you and give you a hug. you felt like you needed to be in his arms, maybe even more so yesterday than today but right now is all you have and your birthday is long gone.
"i will make it up to you, i swear i will." he whispered as he kissed your forehead. you let the tears go, staining his shirt but he didn't care as long as he had you in his arms where you belonged. 
hyunjin ✉
to your dismay and your surprise at the same time, he was knocking at your door an hour later. you knew it was him, he had been spamming your phone ever since you left the building but you couldn't even respond from how disappointed you were. even now you were doubting if you should open the door or leave him knocking all night but you couldn't do that without a neighbor complaining so you decided to head to the entrance and open the door.
"i told you not to come. go back to soohee or whatever you had in mind for today." you said and you wanted to close the door again but he stopped you before you could do it. you looked as he walked into your apartment and took in his appearance. he looked like he almost ripped his hair out and like he had been crying, so pretty much like you did right now.
"i don't even know where to start." he said pacing back and forth and as much as you wanted to hate him, you grabbed his hand and sat down with him before he kept spinning around your apartment. that action alone was enough to calm him down but the glare you were giving him was making him doubt himself all over again. "the only thing i have in mind right now is the fact that i don't want to lose you because i was so fucking stupid."
"you were and i truly don't know how you're gonna get out of this one jinnie. this is beyond it being my birthday just why? why didn't you pick up? why did you show up with her? why didn't you defend me? i feel so stupid." you expressed and the tears were rolling again but so were hyunjin's because he could not stand seeing you cry. you didn't have to feel stupid, he was the stupid one and the one that messed everything up on a special day.
"i didn't pick up because she kept telling me that it was an unknown number calling and hanged it up for me. i showed up with her because she told me she would help me pick up your present at the end of practice and i didn't defend you because i truly wasn't expecting her to say that. i thought she was my friend and i thought she cared about me but i had to kick her out as soon as i saw it all go down." he said in between tears and rambles. you didn't want him to justify himself or his actions but it was nice hearing his side even if you were still very much hurt by everything that happened. 
"hyunjin i always told you how i don't want to interfere in your friendships but she has always hated me and you put her first." you said and he nodded, he was already accepting defeat because he truly did fuck it up this time. you pushed the tears away because you didn't feel like crying anymore and yet they wouldn't stop. 
"i'll leave, you don't deserve to spend the rest of your birthday with someone who did you wrong." he said and even in all this pain, it still hurt when hyunjin didn't fight it anymore. there was a point in all the fights that you've had where he gave up because he could not take in your anger or your sadness, he just wanted to see you smile again. right now he felt like he was holding back what could be a good day for you because it was still your birthday after all and he didn't want to ruin it anymore.
"hyunjin, stay. i can't say that i'm past it yet but i just wanna be with you right now even after all that happened, i just don't see myself going out celebrating if it's not with you by my side." you said, giving him a little smile through all the tears. he got closer to you as he placed a kiss on your lips which you responded to, the most hurtful one you shared yet.
"i'll stay for as long as you want me to and i'll leave if you need me to." he whispered and you nodded because everything was hurting but his words would always find a way to your heart. his hand on your cheek as he caressed it slowly and you met for another kiss.
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breeyn · 7 months
Text
An essay rebutting the “bad writing” claims of s2 ofmd. Spoilers herein.
I’ll preface this with saying you’re obviously allowed to like and dislike whatever you want. I am in no way opposing that. And your reasons are your reasons. Have at. (Also - this is a collection of observations from the past few days, I’m not calling anyone out)
I AM going to rebut the idea that season two was poorly written and lost the spirit of what the show is about.
My favourite movie of all time is Empire Strikes Back. It’s been my favourite movie since I was four. I’m pretty sure it’s a fave of David Jenkins, too. He and Taika have made absolutely no attempt to hide their love of all things 80’s - Prince, the Princess Bride, Kate Bush, Star Wars, etc.
I have ancient video tapes (that I can’t play because who has a vcr) where Lucas is interviewed by Leonard Maltin? Malkin? I dunno. Who cares. Maltin asks him about the Star Wars (original trilogy) story arc. Lucas says “in act I, you introduce all the characters. In act II, you put them in a situation they can’t get out of, and in act III, they get out of it.”
That’s how it works. This is how stories and literary structures work.
Of course you’re not satisfied with season two. You’re not supposed to be.
The arguments I have read on why s2 loses the spirit of s1 is because no one heals. No one learns anything. No one moves forward properly. The person who makes the biggest move towards healing dies. The two main characters end the show doing the exact fucking thing they had promised themselves and each other they wouldn’t do. Our romantic lead still doesn’t understand his value or make any headway on addressing his tragic flaw. It makes no goddamn sense.
My gremlins in weird: it’s not supposed to. In Act 2, EVERYONE LOSES. This is how it goes.
I’ve read a lot of people saying “but this felt like a series finale, not a season finale.” We all know that outside politics play a part here, the strikes make everything precarious. I remember the last writers strike. It destroyed tv for fifteen years. Anyone remember Pushing Daisies? Some of y’all have never had your fave show cancelled with zero resolution for the characters and it shows.
Daddy J did us a kindness. He softened the blow of a tough season. After the brutal cliffhanger of s1, he gave us a little softness and hope. All those things you’re mad aren’t resolved? It’s because THE STORY ISN’T OVER.
No one on earth thinks “stuff all your trauma into a box and ignore it” is good advice. A way to actually live. This show did not have enough screen time to throw out dialogue for no reason. There was foreshadowing in s1 for s2, and there is foreshadowing for s3 in s2. This is a well-crafted story by very smart people who care very much for these characters. There is zero chance Frenchie explained the box in his head for no reason. The reason people have not resolved their trauma and growth is because they haven’t done it *yet*.
And friends - it’s not thinly veiled. They straight up fucking tell us what they’re doing.
Luke Skywalker spends the first two movies fucking up and desperately trying to prove himself and just generally being an idiot. Sound familiar? He ignores the lessons he is supposed to be learning to go off and do what he feels like doing, and loses fucking badly. At the end of Empire, Han is gone, Luke and Leia wave goodbye to the Falcon that has Lando and Chewy - the rest of their crew - aboard. Everyone has lost everything they care about. Vader is undefeated. Yoda is pissed. Nothing is resolved.
You see where I’m going?
If you think I’m stretching this too far, welp, when Ed tells Stede he loves him - the climax of the finale - Stede quotes Han fucking Solo. Like - *it’s right there*. The story structure. The reason everything is unresolved.
So yeah. They wave goodbye to their ship because they have wounds to heal (like Luke’s hand). The people aboard the ship have things to find. Ed and Stede have *not* learned their lesson about whims and how not to be like Anne and Mary. It’s not stupid that they’re doing the same thing, and it’s not pointless that we were shown Anne and Mary. It’s all relevant.
The resolution comes in Act 3. None of these people are done. The story is far, far from over. And just in case the studios want to be dicks about it, David Jenkins was lovely enough to not repeat my enduring heartbreak over Pushing Daisies.
Thank you, @davidjenks 🖤
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rogueddie · 5 months
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Disabled Steve / Eddie Fics
Important: READ THE TAGS! Also, leave a comment and kudos! These fics are amazing and I love them and I hope y'all do too 🦻
give me a sign
findmeinthewychelm
It was sweet torture the way Steve was pining over him. Robin was sick of listening to him talk about Eddie, but she also hadn’t stopped him yet.
Words : 4,235 Chapters : 1/1 Rating : General Audiences
AO3 : x
what would you trade the pain for (i'm not sure)
Library_of_Gage
Steve doesn't bother anyone with his chronic pain; it's something he'd rather keep to himself. And then it spikes in the Upside Down, in front of Eddie Munson, and Steve slowly starts to learn that, sometimes, sharing what hurts does help.
Words : 8,230 Chapters : 1/1 Rating : Teen and Up Audiences
AO3 : x
Our Love is Shown in the Letting Go
Xxbottlecapxx
Steve’s mother comes home and has to deal with the fact that she has no idea who her son is, and maybe never will.
Words : 10,189 Chapters : 1/1 Rating : Not Rated
AO3 : x
Who Am I to Say What Any of This Means?
IndigoFudge
Eddie’s eyebrows are raised. He’s speaking deliberately. “My first grade teacher set up a meeting with Wayne and told him she thought I had autism. So Wayne took me to the doctors and it turned out she was right.”
He is still looking at Steve. Oh. Steve’s been staring at him like an idiot for forty seconds instead of acknowledging this important, incredibly personal detail that he has just shared. Steve remembers eye contact––one, two, three––then answers. “That’s cool.”
“Steve,” Eddie says, carefully. “Have you ever been tested? Because I’ve been noticing… When I look at you, I kinda see some signs.”
Words : 7,371 Chapters : 1/1 Rating : Teen and Up Audiences
AO3 : x
she'll know me crazy, soothe me daily (better yet, she wouldn't care)
jewishrat420
Eddie doesn’t really cry about this anymore. He’s long since shed his own personal tears of pity, spent enough time mourning a different life. He’s accepted it, for the most part, doesn’t really give a shit about being normal or whatever. No one’s normal.
But this…Eddie’s not used to this. He’s never had someone hold his face in their hands, look him dead in the eyes and say, “Eddie Munson. For better or for worse, and fuck, I know this is worse, I want to know you.”
Words : 3,988 Chapters : 1/1 Rating : Teen and Up Audiences
AO3 : x
the beginning of a bad joke
alligator_writes
At the beginning of his rant, lecture, whatever, Hottie stares right at him. He has a really intense stare. Pretty brown eyes set in a prettier face with even prettier hair on top of his head. Eddie gets distracted by all that pretty and by trying to make his point.
And he doesn’t notice until halfway through that Hottie isn’t looking at him anymore. He’s looking at his friend.
Eddie looks at her, too. Looks at her confused and focused expression. Looks at her hands moving rapidly.
Oh. G-d.
Hottie’s deaf, isn’t he?
Words : 7,083 Chapters : 1/1 Rating : Teen and Up Audiences
AO3 : x
I Took The Good Times, I’ll Take The Bad Times (I Take You Just The Way You Are)
steddieeddie
In 1984, Eddie Munson told Steve he was going to marry him one day laying in the quiet confines of Steve’s room.
In 1985, they broke up. It wasn’t because they wanted to, but because Steve thought they had to. They spent almost an entire year apart, hurting, wondering about what could have been.
In 1986, Steve Harrington was almost fatally injured in the final attack against The Upside Down, against Vecna. He spent seventy six days comatose, and then almost an entire year in the hospital learning how to be a person again. He learns how to open and close his hands, hold things, and how to feed himself again. Steve learns how to stand, how to walk, going from walker to cane by the time he is allowed to go home.
In 1987, he did just that. He goes home.
It was a slow process. Way slower than Steve wanted it to be, but it was worth it.
Sure, his hands were never going to work the same, there was constant pain in his arms and left leg, and he would never walk without a cane, but at least he’s alive.
He made it.
That was what mattered.
Words : 30,101 Chapters : 1/1 Rating : Mature
AO3 : x
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bosbas · 5 months
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Chapter 11: if my wishes came true, it would've been you
series masterlist previous part || next part
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pairing: benedict bridgerton x best friend!fem!reader WC: 4.7k words
Warnings: period-typical gender roles, idiots in love being idiots in love, mutual pining
Summary: You and Benedict have been best friends since childhood, but things change dramatically once you come out in society. You’re struggling to find someone you’re as compatible with and who knows you as well as Benedict, all while trying to quell your ever-growing feelings for him. Shenanigans ensue.
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July 21, 1814 - In a rather interesting turn of events, Miss Y/N Beaumont was once more seen promenading on the arm of Anthony Bridgerton. It appeared that the two were quite happily chatting away, an increasingly common sight that comes after almost a month of barely any social appearances for our lady of the season. Was this just another friendly promenade, or could a romance be brewing between the two? Given the closeness of the two families, a union between them would be unsurprising. However, this author was most surprised that it was Anthony who decided to pursue Miss Beaumont rather than her long-time companion, Benedict.
"So you two are properly courting?" asked Hyacinth, shoving the latest Whisteldown column in both of your faces. You were sitting beside Anthony in the Bridgerton sitting room, your book set haphazardly on your lap after Hyacinth had barged in demanding answers.
"Something like that, yes," answered Anthony, grabbing the sheet of paper from her and skimming it over for where it mentioned you.
"What do you mean 'something like that'? You're either courting or you aren't, Anthony," came Hyacinth's exasperated response. You laughed softly at her impatience, understanding her frustration. You, at times, felt the same way. It was an unusual partnership, to be sure, but you were enjoying yourself thus far. You found you could attend social events again, not feeling any pressure to engage in conversation with slimy or uninteresting men.
"It means that I am attending balls again, Hyacinth. It also means that I can continue writing down detailed summaries of these balls and giving them to you the morning after," you said, hoping to distract her from asking any further questions about your courtship with Anthony.
And it seemed to have worked. Her face lit up, knowing you were the only person who currently attended balls that was kind enough, and attentive enough, to keep her informed about the goings on of the ton. She squealed and rushed to hug you, exclaiming "Thank you thank you thank you!!!" into your neck. You hugged her back, amused by her antics.
Suddenly, Hyacinth turned to Anthony, eyes narrowed. "You had better be a good suitor to Y/N. Will you be attending balls with her? And if so, will you be dancing with her? And will you be calling on her? Will you bring her flowers?" she interrogated. Hyacinth considered you to be one of the sweetest from the older bunch of Beaumont-Bridgertons. At least, you never made fun of her and you took her seriously enough that she could have grown-up conversations with you. So Hyacinth wanted to make sure that you were going to be properly courted by her brother. Truthfully, she had hoped you would end up with Benedict. She thought the two of you were in love, based on how he talked about you and how you looked at him, but she supposed she was too young to understand the more complicated aspects of romantic feelings, and perhaps she had misjudged whatever was going on between you and Ben. Nevertheless, she wanted at least one of her brothers to court you the way you deserved, especially after reading about the mostly unpleasant encounters you had with potential suitors thanks to your accounts of your evenings as a debutante.
Anthony patted Hyacinth on her head, laughing at her protectiveness. "Yes, I will be doing whatever Y/N would like me to do. Now run along, I've been attacked in my own home long enough." With a satisfied huff, Hyacinth ran out of the sitting room just as fast as she had come in, snatching Lady Whistledown's column out of Anthony's hand and taking it with her.
You smiled after her, shaking your head fondly. Anthony had let you take the lead on the speed and nature of your courtship, and you were more than grateful for the ability to choose the pace at which the two of you progressed. True to his word, he had not pressed you for an answer to his unusual proposal, and instead let you come to him once you were ready.
And sure enough, a week ago, you had made your way over to the Bridgerton household and asked to speak with Anthony privately. In the quiet of his study, you had accepted his proposal, finally laying to rest your dreams of spending the rest of your life with your best friend. It was a bittersweet moment for you. In a way, you felt relieved that you didn't have to pine after Benedict uselessly anymore, having a solid plan in place now and getting as close to what you wanted out of a marriage as possible, barring the possibility of romantic love. But a louder and more insistent part of you was feeling this loss to the bone. Loss of what you didn't know, since you and Ben had never been romantically involved, nor had you ever expected to marry him. Though you supposed a small part of you always held out some hope that Benedict might feel the same way about you as you did about him. That he also thought about you every night, laying in bed alone and wishing you could be in his arms. That the sketches of you and forehead kisses and endless pages of correspondence and hours spent talking together could mean more than just friendship. But in the end, you knew you had been foolish to think that two decades of friendship could be undone by a half-joking comment asking if he wanted to marry you.
Anthony, for his part, had been delighted, giving you an encouraging smile and a firm squeeze on your shoulder once he heard your final answer. He hadn't expected anything from you, of course, but he was happy that he could provide a solution that would benefit both of you. However, his proposal and your subsequent acceptance created a new challenge. Though you did intend to marry him, this wasn't what was usually considered a 'real' courtship, and you were hesitant to widely announce this fact to the gossip-hungry members of the ton.
"Anthony," you began, taking a seat opposite him. "I think we should discuss how we'll present this to the ton. I don't relish the idea of scandal, and I imagine neither do you."
"Mmm the pesky Lady Whistledown continues her reign of terror," hummed Anthony amusedly, shifting in his seat. "In all honesty, I believe any rumors would more negatively affect you, given the nature of our respective positions in society. I also know this is probably a more delicate situation for you than it is for me, so I'd be happy to go along with whatever you would like," said Anthony, sending you a sympathetic smile at the unspoken mention of Benedict.
Clearing your throat and ignoring the tightness in your chest, you pushed through your hurt. "Well, I think the most obvious question is of who we should tell. About the terms of our partnership, that is," you said, putting your hand on your chin and dreading the headache this whole ordeal would be. "I fear my mother might slit your throat and mine were she to find out that I am purposefully giving up on the possibility of a love match, especially after she told me repeatedly there's no rush," you said, looking up at Anthony with an apology in your eyes.
But he shook his head in response, "That's no bother, it is to be expected. I'm slightly scared my mother would react the same." You let out a snort at the thought of Anthony, at thirty years old, still scared of his mother. He rolled his eyes at you, knowing exactly why you were laughing at him, and continued speaking. "Regardless, I don't think we should tell anyone. We can be vague about our intentions and the specifics of our courtship until I propose publicly."
You nodded, trying to plan out that far ahead and feeling your heart speed up when you thought of Anthony on one knee proposing in front of other people. A real proposal this time. "Perhaps a month will be enough time? For it to be believable that we fell in love. That seems like a reasonable timeline, right?" you asked him, trying to imagine how long it might take you to fall in love with someone. Thinking back on your friendship with Benedict, you could recognize that you had been in love with him for years now, even if you didn't know it at the time. But you didn't have twenty years to fall in love with someone else, so a month with Anthony would have to do.
"Considering we've known each other two decades, I'm sure the ton would believe we were in love if we married tomorrow. It's our families we have to convince," Anthony reminded you. Because we all know you and Benedict are in love, he thought.
You nodded, thinking through all of your family members and their possible reactions to finding out you were marrying Anthony Bridgerton, of all people. If anything, they would probably expect Benedict to be the one to propose, no matter how absurd and impossible the idea was to you now. But this only made it more crucial that your courtship with Anthony was believable.
"I don't think we'll be able to convince Alex after the night we had in your study," you said finally. "Besides, it might be beneficial to have someone else on our side helping convince our families."
Although he seemed unsure, Anthony eventually conceded, letting out a grunt. "I'm inclined to agree. I could tell him later tonight at White's," he suggested. "We were planning on going with Colin and the twins but I'm sure I'll get a moment alone with him. It will probably be best to tell him earlier rather than later if I don't want a black eye," he joked, winking at you.
"Thank you," you answered gratefully. You weren't quite sure how Alexander would react to the news, knowing that you had just had your heart broken by Benedict and were now jumping into a partnership with his older brother, so you were happy Anthony offered to tell him instead of facing him yourself.
"So, how should we start courting?" you asked. "Well, not actually courting, but you know what I mean," you quickly corrected yourself.
Anthony smiled softly at you, understanding your need to specify that this wasn't a real courtship. Unlike you, he wasn't deeply in love with his best friend, so it was much easier for him to start pursuing someone, however real or fake it might be. But he knew that, at some level, you felt like you were betraying Benedict. Or at least betraying the feelings you had for him. At that moment, Anthony truly wished that Benedict would stop being a complete idiot. If not for Ben's own sake then to stop the absolute torment he saw in your eyes every time you thought of a future without your best friend.
"Ah, yes, our incredibly cunning ruse," Anthony responded, trying to keep his tone light. "I think we could probably start with a promenade a few days from now if you are amenable. It might be good to start with something a bit more casual," he said carefully.
"That's a good idea," you agreed. "Perhaps two days from now? It will give Alex enough time to digest the idea and I can mention to my mother that you asked if I wanted to get back into the social scene after such a long hiatus. I'm sure she'll be ecstatic enough to ignore the minor details."
Anthony nodded, already planning his speech to your older brother. "I can also start making off-handed comments around my family to really sell it," he suggested.
"Oh, that's perfect! I think we might just pull it off," you said, smiling at Anthony and feeling a weight lifted off your shoulders.
But Anthony could not relax yet. He cleared his throat uncomfortably, knowing you needed to address the issue of Benedict but also understanding that it was a relatively painful topic at the moment. After shifting in his seat slightly and receiving a quizzical look from you, he finally spoke up. "How would you like to tell Benedict?" he asked delicately.
You winced at the mention of his name. You had no idea, to be honest. How were you going to tell your best friend that you were marrying his brother? Saying it in person and having to see Benedict's reaction in person would be incredibly painful, but saying it in a letter would be worse, you reasoned. Especially since you had avoided any mention of potential suitors in your correspondence thus far, and were planning on continuing to do so. The letters exchanged between you were too precious, too intimate, to be ruined by the mention of one of your suitors. You stared at Anthony, resigned. "It would probably be better coming from me, wouldn't it?"
Anthony gave you a sympathetic smile. "I'm not trying to get out of doing it, I know this will be one of the most difficult parts. But I believe it'll be better if he hears this from you. He would be crushed if he found out you were getting married from anyone other than you."
You sat back in your seat, overwhelmed by the magnitude of what was to come. If Ben reacted negatively to your relationship with Anthony, you might never see him again. You were desperate to make the blow as soft as possible and preserve as much of your friendship with Ben as you could. "I suppose you're right. I want to tell him in person, though," you said, nervously playing with your fingers. You felt thick tears in your eyes at the realization that if Benedict were here right now, he would be the one rubbing your hand with his thumb as he usually did when you were anxious.
Sensing your inner conflict, Anthony jumped to provide you with a solution. "If you want our courtship to last for a month, that aligns almost perfectly with our country house party in Kent. It would make sense for Benedict to come to Aubrey Hall for the party anyway, and you could have some time alone with him to tell him."
You nodded, quickly blinking the tears from your eyes. It was a perfect plan, indeed. Everything fit together perfectly, you realized with a sinking feeling. You were still half-hoping that there would be a reason you couldn't go through with this, or a massive oversight as to why the plan wouldn't work. But it seemed to be foolproof. Even the painful bits were accounted for and Anthony had made them to be as painless as possible.
And so began the biggest deceit of your life. All things considered, it was good fun. You and Anthony had decided to see each other four times per week, attending a minimum of two balls together and promenading once. Although it had only been a week, you found yourself enjoying the change of pace. You could now attend balls without having to interact with any desperate bachelors vying for your hefty dowry. What's more, Anthony had been bringing you a bouquet after every ball, which served to placate your mother above all else.
Even promenading with Anthony was enjoyable, seeing as the two of you understood each other quite well. It was nothing compared to how deeply Benedict understood you, or how engaging discussions were with him, but Anthony was miles ahead of anyone besides Ben. After only a week of courting, you found yourself better able to think about Benedict without dissolving into a puddle of tears, desperately wondering whether or not he was thinking of you while in the countryside. Your letters to him became less painful and more frequent, as you were able to push through your debilitating love for him and just enjoy speaking about art and literature.
As time went on, you were growing more and more confident that you had made the right decision, especially now that Lady Whistledown had written about your courtship, as Hyacinth had so kindly informed you. Whistledown's words were gospel to the people of polite society, so her mention of the two of you helped cement the validity of your budding relationship. Hopefully both your families would follow the rest of the ton and accept that Anthony, and not Benedict, was the one you were spending the majority of your time with now.
Although you had hoped Alex would help you in this endeavor, he had been unyieldingly silent on the matter. The day after Anthony explained your plan to him at White's, he came into your room and informed you that he knew what you and Anthony were doing. You had expected him to show at least some form of emotion, but he had simply said that he would not stand in your way and walked right out without any further discussion. Even now, a week later, he refused to talk about it with you, immediately changing the subject or just outright leaving the room when the matter of you and Anthony came up in conversation. You were disappointed, feeling like you were living a lie in and out of your home, but you supposed it was for the best. You could sacrifice talking to someone who knew the whole story for the assurance that none of your family would find out the truth. Especially not your mother.
---
As you looked out of your window to the beautiful grounds of Aubrey Hall, your mind couldn't help but drift to Benedict's latest letter. His reply had been short, which was to be expected given that you had asked him to return from the countryside to meet your future husband. Writing the letter had been almost physically painful, but you knew it was necessary. You could only hope that the tears on the paper were not too noticeable once they reached Ben.
After nearly a month of faking a courtship with Anthony, you were much more well-adjusted when it came to talking and thinking about Benedict. But a month was nowhere near long enough to quell the now all-encompassing love you had spent years growing. You didn't think you could ever stop loving Benedict, not entirely anyway. He was your Benedict, and he would be forever. You had grown up so intertwined in one another that he was as much a part of you as you were yourself. The love you felt for him was not a feeling, exactly, but more of a part of your identity. And it was all good and fun until you had to give that up to be with someone else. Though Anthony, bless him, was making it as easy for you as he could. He expected nothing more than what you were willing to give, and you couldn't thank him enough. It had been surprisingly easy to fall into a partnership with him, not feeling the undue stress of having to promptly get over Benedict that you had felt with all of your other suitors.
Your thoughts were interrupted as Theo and Bastian knocked on your door, barging in when you opened the door just a fraction. They ignored your exasperated sigh, opting instead to sit on your bed. Seeing Bastian's shoe-clad feet on your white bedding incited an anger in you that only your brothers knew how to elicit. But your murderous intentions were cut short by Theo's question.
"So, will Benedict be joining us?"
Your heart skipped a beat as you gazed from one twin to the other, trying to gauge the intention of their question. Seeing your anxious eyes, Theo rushed to explain. "We only wanted to check because... you know... yeah," he finished lamely.
"Because what?" you demanded, slightly put off by what they were implying. Thus far, your family had abstained from mentioning Benedict when speaking about your courtship with Anthony. Although they had been visibly shocked by the idea at first, they had now grown used to seeing you with Anthony instead of Benedict and it had become somewhat of the norm. Except perhaps for Cass, who was still young and a hopeful romantic. You knew she secretly still wished that Ben would return from the countryside in some kind of grand romantic gesture that would sweep you off your feet. Unfortunately, you simply couldn't afford to think that way for your sanity. Instead, you ignored her sad looks whenever Anthony sent you a particularly large bouquet of roses. So it came as a little bit of a shock that Theo and Bastian were being so forthright about the subject, showing little to no tact in handling what was a very painful situation for you.
You saw your brothers exchange a panicked look, clearly not expecting your bristling tone. "Because we haven't seen him in a while!" blurted out Bastian.
"Yes, exactly," said Theo, nodding aggressively. "It's just been some time since we last saw Benedict and we're wondering whether you knew if he'll be coming. So we can see him and all. Is he doing alright?"
You sniffed, crossing your arms stiffly and uttering a curt reply, "I see. Well, yes. He will be coming. He should be arriving in a few hours. And yes, he's alright. He's been faring quite well but I think he's coming back to town properly now."
Catching the wide-eyed look they exchanged, you rolled your eyes in annoyance. "And yes! He knows I've been courting someone, which I know was your next question. Though he doesn't know it's Anthony so don't you dare tell him. I will tell him myself once he arrives," you warned them.
"Wouldn't dream of it," assured Theo.
"Sorry about that. Let us know if you need anything," added Bastian.
You hummed. "Thank you very much. Now please get your dirty shoes off my bed or I'm afraid I will have to kill you. And we wouldn't want to make Mother sad over the death of two of her sons, would we?
They stood up off suddenly your bed and straightened up, clearly not having expected this to be such a hostile conversation. But they were glad you had at least cracked a joke, even if the comment threatened their untimely death. They laughed nervously and bid their goodbyes, exiting your room quickly.
A deep sigh escaped your lips as you closed the door after them, placing your forehead against the cool wood. You had most likely overreacted, but you would have to apologize another time. The sinking feeling of anxiety in your stomach took precedence over your brothers right now, as much as it was inconvenient for them.
The earlier flutters in your stomach had turned into giant somersaults, and you felt like you were going to be positively sick. You would have to tell Benedict that you were engaged to Anthony soon since you knew it would be unimaginably cruel to let Ben learn about your courtship to his brother as he was proposing to you.
The easiest thing would be to tell him during one of your nature walks. Whenever you were at Aubrey Hall, you and Benedict went on nature walks around the grounds, where you would often point out familiar flower and plant species, and he would remind you to take in the beautiful landscape. These walks could often last for hours, just the two of you wrapped up in each other's presence. And although it was usually Ben who suggested them, you had planned to ask him on a nature walk tomorrow morning to break the news that Anthony was the man you intended to marry. It would give him ample time and space to process the information, and some precious privacy to sort out any unresolved feelings on both sides.
Yet, the meticulously thought-out plan you had come up with did absolutely nothing to soothe your fears for the actual moment that you would tell him. In all honesty, you had no idea how Benedict would react. You weren't even sure how you wanted him to react. You supposed the best-case scenario would be if he calmly listened and said he understood your choice, and perhaps even thought it a good idea since you would be able to remain close to him. But you couldn't help a very tiny part of you that had previously been locked in the depths of your brain from hoping that Benedict wouldn't react calmly. That he would be impossibly angry. Angry with you, and with Anthony, and with himself. So angry that maybe he would realize that he did love you, after all, however unrealistic that might be.
With a determined exhale, you pushed yourself off the door and started getting ready to go downstairs to Anthony's study. The twins' unexpected inquiry had thrown you off balance, but you couldn't afford to let it linger in your thoughts. Anthony had asked you to stop by once you arrived at Aubrey Hall to iron out the details of his proposal. In less than a week, he would officially be your fiancé, and you had to start figuring out how it would actually happen.
---
As Benedict rode through the picturesque countryside toward Aubrey Hall, the weight of the impending conversation with you settled in his chest. The familiar scenes outside the carriage window, once a source of solace, now seemed to blur as his mind whirred with conflicting emotions. The letter you had sent him requesting his presence at Aubrey Hall so he could meet your future husband lay heavily in his pocket. Ben could barely breathe from the weight of the knowledge that you were so close to being out of his grasp forever.
Reading that letter for the first time had evoked a sharp pain in his chest that he couldn't shake even now, almost a week later. Benedict was beyond nervous to meet whoever you might be marrying, unsure if he would be able to successfully hide his overpowering love for you. However, he couldn't seem to forget the faint tear stains slightly smudging your handwriting of the letter in his pocket. A selfish part of him wished that you might be sad to be marrying this mystery man. That you had settled for someone less worthy and Ben could continue to be confident (if you could call what he was feeling right now confidence) in his decision to forgo a marriage with you. But this fleeting hope was immediately replaced with guilt. You deserved more than an unhappy marriage, even if it meant embracing a future that felt like a cruel twist of fate for Benedict's own heart. Despite the agonizing ache he was feeling, he knew would do this again ten times over if it guaranteed your happiness.
Arriving at Aubrey Hall, Ben dismissed the carriage with a nod of thanks to the driver. With his belongings in tow, he decided to stop by Anthony's study first. His older brother had surely already met your suitor and could perhaps offer some insight so Benedict wasn't entirely blindsided when you officially introduced him.
As Ben approached the door, he caught the sound of your voice, a sweet sound that made him smile wider than he had since he left you. He couldn't help but linger for a moment, enchanted by the familiarity of your tone and wishing he hadn't spent so long away from it.
But his attention sharpened as he overheard your conversation with Anthony. "I think it might be best if it's not a massive surprise to our families, especially Hyacinth. So, would you want to announce our engagement before everyone gets here? Sometime in the coming days? And then you can propose to me properly once all the guests arrive?" he heard you speak.
Benedict's world ground to a halt. The words hung in the air, a revelation that left him stunned. He went numb, pure anger coursing through his veins as he burst open the door and barged into his older brother's study. His eyes, aggressively narrowed into slits, fell on his best friend, sitting at his brother's desk as Anthony leaned against it. Time froze as you and Anthony turned towards him, expressions of shock clear on your faces.
"I beg your pardon?" he spoke, tone low and venomous as he breathed heavily. "What the bloody hell did you just say?"
A/N: just wanted to say thank you everyone so much for reading ahhhh I'm so happy to see all of your reactions after every part and I just LOVE YOU okay kisses bye
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femmad · 5 months
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English is not my language, if there are errors, excuse me. If you don't feel comfortable reading you can stop. It's also my first time writing something like this.
This story can also be found in its original version in Spanish on my Wattpad account. Only here and on my Wattpad account have I published them. If another account publishes them, please notify me and report it.
"What do you want to do?"
Warning: +18. Mature content below, I am not responsible for any discomfort, I already gave a warning. Unedited.
I quietly enter the room after saying goodbye to Eun-Yu and Chan Young, promising to meet again soon. I notice how calm and ethereal Hyun-soo looks lying on the stretcher with his eyes closed and the sun bathing his skin. I approach at a slow pace trying not to break his bubble when he slowly opens his eyes, but unlike his beautiful dark eyes I find bright blue eyes.
- Hyun-soo... - he interrupts me before I can say anything.
- You know, he was very sad without you - he says with a thick voice - We were hoping to find you when he was saving that girl - his eyes watching me deeply, analyzing every detail - Did you change us for that idiot who came with you - he asks in mocking tone.
- I could never change you, he is just a friend, he helped us after everything that happened - I lower my head feeling nervous under his deep gaze.
- A friend doesn't see you as if he wants to eat you - he smiles maliciously - That's how I see you.
After a few minutes in silence I raise my head when I hear him move. He approaches slowly, circling around me, I feel like I am enclosed in these four walls, as if I have fallen into his trap, his gaze makes a shiver run through me from head to toe, which makes him smile. I see that his eyes are a little darker, so he looks like a predator and I am the prey.
- What are you doing? - I ask nervously, raising my head to be able to see him when he approaches me with his big height. He leans down to be in front of my face with that smile that doesn't mean anything good.
- I don't know - he whispers looking at my lips - What should we do? - he asks mockingly - What do you want to do?
We stare at each other for a moment until he leans in, pressing his lips to mine. His soft lips quickly dominate mine, I feel his hands running over my hips until he lifts my shirt, placing his rough hands on my waist. I gasp when he bites my lip to insert his tongue. I slowly bring my hands to his face, brushing away his hair.
- We shouldn't do this - I whisper between kisses, pushing him a little - Bring Hyun-soo back.
He separates from me with a mocking smile - He's resting but don't worry, he and I are one - his hand goes up to caress my left cheek - We've been waiting for this moment since the last time we took you - he caresses my lips before introduce his thumb, which I unconsciously suck. He tilts his head to the side with his eyes fixed on my lips - You can't imagine the things he wanted to do to you from the moment he saw you after so long.
He takes my neck, bringing our lips together again, gently but firmly pushes my body until it hits the stretcher attached to the wall. His hand on my neck goes down to take one of my breasts in his hand, he squeezes it roughly making me squirm and gasp when he begins to caress my nipple covered only by the thin shirt I'm wearing. He takes advantage of that opportunity to introduce his tongue, invading my mouth.
I let myself be carried away by the feeling of being with Hyun-soo again. I remember one time we were together, the first time his monster made an appearance at a time like this. Hyun-soo always took me gently and timidly, but it changed from one moment to the next.
~
I gasp when Hyun-soo licks my nipple while one of his fingers plays with my clit. I get lost in the sensation and start to squirm feeling like I'm about to cum - Hyun-soo - I sob squeezing his shoulders. He raises his head looking at me with his innocent eyes, releasing my nipple with a soft pop - Faster please - I gasp with tears in my eyes, unable to help myself I move my hips against his.
He joins his lips to mine, obeying my request, he begins to push faster, leveling his attacks with the movements on my clitoris, I moan, feeling that I am coming, pressing against him, making me gasp between desperate attacks. He comes out of me quickly cumming all over my pussy. With heavy breathing, I smile satisfied when I feel him move next to me. He moves away from me and I adjust so we can hug together, when suddenly I feel his hands firmly holding my hips.
- I'm not done yet - he whispers hoarsely before turning me around, letting me support myself with my elbows and knees.
- Hyun-soo? - I asked dazed, still not coming down from my previous orgasm - Wait, I'm still sensitive... ah! - I scream when he buries himself in my pussy with one blow.
I sob as I feel my pussy spasming trying to adjust. I gasp, feeling a pleasure that causes goosebumps all over my body - What a good girl for us - he gasps as he begins to violently hit my pussy. I can't understand his words as I feel a new orgasm forming quickly. His hands squeeze my hips to ensure each thrust, it will undoubtedly leave marks.
- Hyun-soo please - I sob feeling tears falling down my face - It's very... - he interrupts me with a strong spank that makes me scream.
- Take it - his hoarse voice orders - Take it like a good whore.
~
He brings me out of my luxurious thoughts by inserting his right hand through my pants and panties.
- So wet from some kisses - he asks amused - Or is that little head of yours thinking about my cock - without giving me a chance to respond, he kisses me abruptly, finding my clitoris quickly, playing roughly with it, making me take his wrist to try to slow it down. Without wasting time he collects my juices and inserts one of his fingers making me gasp into his mouth - You are so tight - another of his fingers enters me with fluid movements, you can hear the splashing sound thanks to how wet my pussy is .
- Take me - I beg him, wanting his cock inside me - Please, I need you.
He smiles at me before lowering my pants while I help him take off my shoes and shirt. When I finish, he puts me on the stretcher and opens my legs. I try to cover myself, feeling very vulnerable since he was fully dressed. - Don't cover yourself - he says, removing my arms that cover my breasts. - Unless you want me to tie you up so that nothing gets in the way - I swallow, imagining myself tied up, leaving my body completely at his mercy.
Without waiting any longer he opens his pants and lowers them to the middle of his thigh, he takes my legs pulling my body until my bottom is on the edge, he pushes my panties aside and spits on my pussy making me jump, he rubs his cock wetting it before slowly entering me. I gasp from the heat of the stretch, wincing as I feel his big, heavy cock pulsing in my pussy. When it is completely buried, take my legs, bending them in half until they stick to my chest - Don't let go - he orders, placing my hands to support my legs. And then take my hips.
He begins to thrust sharply without warning, making a high-pitched moan come out of me - Hyun-soo - I beg, looking at him with big eyes as his hips increase in speed. His grunts make my pussy tighten.
- After separating from you we could only think about you - he pants while smiling devilishly - About how much of a whore you are for us, how well you take us - he pinches my nipples making me make a strange noise from the pleasure and pain together that feel so good , he always knows how to make me feel good - When we saw you with that soldier I was about to kill him - he takes my throat with his big hand while I fix my eyes on his eyes that have become darker - But he didn't want to, he was very distracted with how small and pretty you looked - he slows down with hard thrusts, he moves closer until our lips touch - he was just imagining how good you would look moaning taking this cock - he returns with his hard thrusts at an inhuman speed, I wrinkle my face unable to bear the pleasure.
- Go slower - I whisper tremblingly as my eyebrows are together and tears run down my cheeks - Hyun-soo please, slower... ah! - I moan as my hips shake against him, I feel my legs shake as he continues.
- Take it - he growls, squeezing my legs that slipped from my hands. I sob as I come, feeling spasms run through my body - That's it - he chuckles, interrupting himself with a moan when he feels my pussy suffocating him. I gasp feeling another orgasm coming over me.
- Hyun... it's too much, please stop - I feel my tongue numb as I drawl the words, contrary to what I say my pussy tightens without wanting to let it out - I-I... it feels... - I stop talking, my lips parted as I stare into nothingness.
- Have I fucked your brain yet, doll? - He lets out an evil laugh, one of his hands rubs my clit quickly while the other holds my leg up.
- Please - I beg without knowing what to ask him. My body writhes from tickling everywhere - It feels strange - I sob feeling my body being invaded by pleasure coming from everywhere.
He takes his wet hand out of my pussy to slap one of my tits, making me jump and throw my head back - Did you like that, pretty? How about this? - He slaps my pussy making a stream come out of me, wetting his shirt and pants. I scream, feeling like I'm dripping until I hear some liquids fall to the floor - What a dirty doll.
I feel like I'm fading from so much pleasure when he finally comes with a grunt filling me completely. I caress my boy's back and hair letting our breathing calm down, after a while I feel small kisses on my cheeks and lips - Good girl - I see his brown eyes again as he falls on top of me hugging me.
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flamingpudding · 7 months
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Fictober23 Prompt: 19 - "What if we're wrong?"
Fandom: DPxDC
Rating: T
Warnings: -
A/N: Sort of Danny's perspective and a different side to Prompt 4, probably not as creative as the awesome reblogs and comments but hope people will still like it. Also posting this early too because I am an impatient B and going to be busy with work tomorrow again.
Danny looked nervously up at his sister who was giving him an encouraging smile and had placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. His gaze wandered back to the paper in his hands, a face with a confident smile printed largely on it. A cutout from a business magazine Jazz had happened to read.
"It's not too late, we could still just turn around and go back to Amity." Danny muttered, the paper crumpling ever so slightly in his hands. His sister sighed, wishing that her brothers best friends could have come along with them.
"Danny, it will be fine." She told him her hand moved from his shoulder to rub comforting circles on her brother's back. "Let's settle into the hotel first. We have your entire semester vacation to figure out how to continue from there."
"But Jazz, what if we're wrong? Just because I was adopted as a baby and that Ancestry thing I did in middle school contacted us about someone matching up with the DNA I sent there in middle school, it doesn't mean that he is…"
"Danny." Jazz cut in, lightly pushing her brother forward so he would start moving. "You are starting to overthink again."
"But we could be wrong!" Danny insisted once more the paper now completely crumbled in his hands. "This sounds too good to be true! And you know that good things don't just easily happen to me! I know something is going to happen to mess it all up or maybe I will mess it all up and…"
Jazz turned on her brother to make him face her, they had barely managed to step out of the airport before her brother fell into another spiral, one of many he had ever since that Ancestry Agency had contacted them. She cradled her brother's face in her hands making him look at her.
"Danny. When you had that school project about Ancestry in middle school, Mom and Dad admitted to having you adopted as a baby but not your twin brother you already freaked out then. You did that whole DNA thing with the school project as cover in hopes that your brother might have done it too. When nothing came back from it, what did I tell you then?"
"That I was an idiot to do it behind your back?" Jazz pinched her little brother's cheeks with a fond smile.
"Not that, what else did I say?"
"That I will always be your brother no matter what?"
"And?"
"And… and that I shouldn't lose hope because you would help me if I really wanted to meet him."
Jazz changed her hold on her brother from cradling his face to hugging him tightly. "That's right idiot. So if you really want to go back to Amity Park we can easily do that, there is no need for you to panic." She felt her brother nodd into her shoulder. "So do you really want to go back?"
"I guess… I could at least see if all these magazines are telling the truth and if he really is living a good life." Jazz pulled away from her brother now holding him by his shoulders and beamed at him happily. Before leading her brother to the hotel she had booked for them.
Both did not notice that their little exchange had happened in perfect view of a surveillance camera and had gotten caught by someone who had gotten interested in their movements ever since a certain someone had a little freak out in regards to finding someone that shared his DNA.
Later at night on the same day, Danny found himself unable to sleep. Feeling restless he decided to take a look at the night sky's of Gotham in hopes to calm his growing nervousness ever since he arrived in this city. Jazz was sleeping peacefully in the room next to his, so to not disturb her, he changed forms, turned invisible and phased through several ceilings until he reached the roof.
Once there Danny dropped his invisibility as well as transformation and just sat on the roof, not on the edge mind you, but by the door that usually would have led up here doing his best to look as much as a normal civilian trying to enjoy the night sky as possible. He had heard about Batman not wanting any Metas in his city, Phantom probably wouldn't be very welcomed either then.
Danny sat there staring up at the cloudy skies, frowning how with the light pollution and clouds he was unable to see even a single star. He was contemplating the pros and cons about changing form and flying above the cloud level to see the stars when he heard a soft thud not too far from him. Too silent to be picked up by normal hearing but his ghost enchanted one picked it up.
"You are not from Gotham, are you?" Danny tensed at the voice that resounded over the roof. His head turned towards where the voice came from and noticed the figure shadowed by the clouds, glad in red and black colores. "Gothamites know not to be out on roofs at night."
Danny swallowed but didn't move as the figure stepped closer. "You are Red Robin."
"So you know of me?" Danny watched how the other twirled around a bo-staff, if he didn't know better he would have said that the vigilante appeared nervous.
"My best friend kind of told me about the vigilantes of Gotham when he learned that I was going to visit the city." He carefully admitted to Red Robin and Danny wasn't lying Tucker had prepared an entire list about Gotham's vigilantes as well as all the celebrities. Danny was very thankful that he had not mentioned to his best friend that Tim Drake-Wayne might be the twin he had been looking for for years now. That would have been a whole other ordeal he didn't want to deal with yet.
"Got a favorite yet?" The vigilante asked and did Danny imagine it or was his tone weirdly hopeful?
He shrugged as answer, noting how the vigilantes' shoulders appear to drop in disappointment. Though a moment later Red Robin walked a bit closer and crouched, while Danny had yet to move from his sitting position. "So… why are you out on the roof late at night?"
"I was hoping to see the stars."
"The stars?"
"Stargazing always helped me calm down." Danny admitted turning his gaze from the vigilante to the cloudy sky. He didn't take his eyes completely off the other, his shoulders were still tense but for some reasons his body wanted to relax in the other's presence.
"You went up on a roof late at night to calm down?" He eyed the vigilante, wondering why the other was so interested in Danny right now but also wondering if Danny was really going to dumb his whole emotional turmoil on a complete stranger. What would Jazz say if she knew about this? Probably psycho analyze this whole situation and reason that Danny just wanted someone not involved to just listen to him without the objectives Jazz wasn't able to provide.
He eyed the vigilante once more, noting how the other appeared to be just as tense as Danny was, before opening his mouth. "I am only in Gotham because the twin I have been looking for for years lives here."
The vigilante hummed, sounding interested, indicating for Danny to continue. "I don't even know if he knows about me or would even want to see me. For all I know he doesn't even know I exist. Mom and Dad adopted me from the orphanage as a baby but not my twin brother."
Danny started to ramble on not noticing the sharp intake of air Red Robin took. "He may have a perfectly good life! And here I am appearing out of nowhere and possibly destroying it! What if I mess up his whole family dynamic! I mean how crazy is that? A stranger just appears out of nowhere saying he is your twin with no proof other than the stupid mail from an Ancestry DNA Testing facility stating they found a DNA similar to your own? Ancients, this sounds even more stupid when I say it out loud!"
In his rant Danny hadn't noticed Red Robin having come closer and their hand carefully hovering over his shoulder. "Hey…"
He looked up sharply at the vigilante next to him that was now placed on his shoulder, radiating a warmth that felt grounding to Danny. "I am sure it is not as bad as you think it is. If those Ancestry people contacted you, they might have contacted your twin also and who knows he could possibly be very interested in learning more about your whole situation?"
Danny blinked at the vigilante that was apparently trying to give him a reassuring smile despite the upper half of his face being covered by a mask and he couldn't help but return the smile with a small grateful one of his own.
The vigilante looked like he wanted to say something else but Danny's phone suddenly started buzzing, he hurried to pull it out of his pockets noticing several texts from his sister arriving in a rapid fashion.
"My sister." He muttered, looks like Jazz had woken up and tried to check on him like he was still a little child, he smiled fondly at the phone.
Side eyeing the vigilante, both stood up. "I uh…"
"You better hurry back in. She will probably grow more worried the longer you stay up here."
Blinking at the vigilante, Danny nodded, moving towards the door that would lead back into the building while the vigilante started to move towards the edge of the building. Before Danny could try to see if the door was locked or open he turned over his shoulder wanting to voice his thanks to the other for listening to his ranting but found the vigilante gone.
Staring for a moment before shrugging Danny let his eyes wander over the roofs of the other buildings just in case before deciding to forgo his transformation and just phase through the floors invisible without it until he reached his room.
In the shadows on the roof of the building to the side Red Robin arched an eyebrow under his mask before turning to the coms. "Meta status is confirmed. Also Nightwing, think you can help me create the most natural and unsuspicious situation for me to meet him tomorrow? I already have a couple of ideas."
"I think we can work something out easily RR."
"Good."
"It sounded like there was a whole lot more to this twin situation than we originally thought."
"Yea..."
"Chin up Red! We will get to the bottom of this!"
"He likes stargazing..." Red Robin mutter to himself, not really listening to his siblings on the coms. "I will take him to the planetarium, first chance I got."
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writingmeraki · 8 months
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hazy eyes, clear thoughts I
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a roronoa zoro imagine !
synopsis : in which letting your drunken mouth spill your sober thoughts leads you to a very unexpected consequence. ( read: everyone saw it coming except you and **** )
pairing : opla!zoro x gn!reader, idiots to lovers!
genre : disgustingly fluffy fluff, five tablespoons of angst and probable romance.
warnings : cussing, mentions of alcohol and getting wasted, zoro kinda mean, probably terrible humour, shit ton of giggling, also very all over the place but kinda cute? not entirely proofread, also lmk if I forgot to add any other warning !
author's note : well oh well, look we have another totally not self indulgent zoro oneshot/drabble/imagine n e ways I hit a sort of weird point of the series, I'm stuck but i am like 87% done with ch 1?? i hope I'll be able to do it soon enough ^^ tysm for ur patience !! let me know what you think of this! also PART 2?!? ( I need to know if people wanna read this randomness further 😆😅🤣👍🏽)
word count : 4.8k
gif creds !
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 “Oh-kay! I think that’s enough!”
You frowned when Nami took the drink from your hand, whining in protest when she kept it further away which she knew your drunken self would be unable to reach.
“B-but it’s good, it’s making me happy!” You giggled as you pointed at yourself and then pouted, pulling your manipulative tactic, one you did a lot when you wanted something especially one you did when you were shit-face drunk. 
With large doey eyes, you pleaded at her, “You don’t want me to be sad right? I’ll be sad if you don’t give me- that.” You pointed in a direction you thought she placed the beer but of course, it was way off.
“See, you can’t even make out where I’ve placed the beer! I don’t care if it makes you upset and honestly, it was fun to see you make a fool out of yourself, but now it’s just…sad.” She sighed, a tone of sympathy as she finished her sentence,
“I know why you’re drinking and it’s not a good way to distract yourself from your feelings! Drinking worsens the problem!” She scolded you to which you now felt a small anger form within you.
“Well then, how else am I supposed to get rid of this dread and just stupidity huh? Being sober is a constant reminder!” 
“Your feelings aren’t stupid! You like him, I’d say even love! You can’t just assume your feelings are invalid not until you know how the other person feels!” Your best friend felt a rage you’d feel if you saw someone you care about demean their feelings, a sort of anger at them hidden with laces of sympathy.
“He doesn’t fucking care! He only cares about his promises and that’s…that’s his life, his own…way of living so it’s fine!”
“Feelings to him are just…distractions.” You gulped as you recalled the way he replied to Luffy when the Captain was teasing him about falling in love. 
[ a few moments ago ]
“Zoro, don’t you think you should consider finding a partner, don’t you also want to fall in love and experience all the magical things that come with it?” Luffy teased as you all sat around a barrel, deciding to just hang out after a busy day. 
Zoro had a beer in one hand as he took a sip and then rolled his eyes, you’d been seeing his reaction, undoubtedly your heart picking up its pace when you heard the question. 
“I don’t need love, or call it a partner if you will. I already have enough on my plate, all that so-called magical stuff is just a distraction.” He replied, with no hesitation which left no option but for the listeners to believe his words.
Just because he’d spoken his opinion, it didn’t mean it hurt less. You knew it though, from the start that Zoro was a determined individual. Despite having his own goals, he also cared about others like Luffy even though he didn't show it much, less that he said it verbally.
It was what made you like him in the first place. After all, what’s more, better than a man who knows what he wants, is determined to get what he wants, cares for those he considers his friends, and the bonus cherry on top being he was quite easy on the eyes too. 
A whole package indeed. 
And you didn’t even know when your supposed “I admire him as a person to look up to” turned into “Oh, I think I am in love with him.” 
But ah, that’s the beauty of love and all the magical stuff, isn’t it? You never know when you’ll be the one who finally falls into it.
That’s why, after hearing his words, you felt your heart sink just a little. Screw it, you think you felt it weigh a shit ton and sink to the very pit of your stomach. 
Nami, oh Nami, what a friend she was truly, because immediately her eyes darted to you after Zoro’s words and she saw your expression go down just as quickly as Zoro downed his bottle of beer. 
Luffy chuckled, of course, he would, the poor lad was just teasing in the first place anyway to irk Zoro and obviously, he didn’t know about poor old you’s feelings. 
I think I need to go. 
It sucked how you couldn’t refute against him. How you couldn’t yell that love is not just a “distraction”, love is something that makes one feel more…human. Love is a wonderful thing and how if someone were to experience it, it makes you feel….it makes you feel just happy at being in the presence of the one you, love. Just…love is not…it’s not-
“Uh guys,” You piped up after sensing the tense atmosphere, tense to you anyway since you felt like a seashell was clogged up your throat. 
“I’m gonna go…get some fresh air. Yeah uh- I’ll be behind if you need me.” You abruptly got up, smiling tightly at Luffy, purposefully avoiding Nami’s questioning yet pitiful look and harshly blatantly ignoring how Zoro’s attention turned towards you, about to question you too, his face showing the emotions he’d not show before 5 bottles of beer. 
Sighing quietly, you picked up the drink you’d been downing, still having an adequate portion in it and you thought about it, saying fuck it as you grabbed two more from the stack that was in the middle.
“Continue with…your shenanigans,” You turned around and let your emotions finally show on your face, words repeatedly swinging in your head as you tried to filter them out. 
It’s nothing but a distraction.
And now, a few bottles (2) and a whole lot of giggling later, you may have truly begun to take Zoro’s words seriously. 
“I feel sick, perhaps it’s my heart breaking, see it hurts here the most.” You groaned as you looked out into the sea, pointing to your chest, though inaccurate as you held your right side, the sun appearing as a blurry blight light due to your vision becoming hazier as you got more drunk.
Nami sighed at you, realizing you should probably just be made to go to bed, despite it being only a few hours away from actual nightfall.
“Come on, let’s go, you’ve thought enough,” She stood up, having been sitting beside you on a barrel while you’d been sitting on the same.
She pushed her hand outwards towards you, to which you giggled and you were pretty sure your cheeks ached now. 
“Namii~how do you have-” you pointed your finger out, counting the fingers “-ten fingers! On one hand?!” You continued staring at her hand in awe as she rolled her eyes, a small grin on her face, finding your drunken self a tiny bit cute. 
Suddenly you felt your world stumble as she grabbed you and pulled you upwards, you now decided you did not know how to walk and leaned your entire body weight on her. 
Now, Nami wasn’t a weak person but considering how you were more on the taller side than her while also being a bit more buff due to the immense training you did every day to practice your own skills, you did weigh more.
She quickly made you sit back down when she realized she couldn't possibly carry you, she needed help.
"Stay here 'kay? I'll be back." She told you to which you obediently nodded, which made a genuine grin form on her face.
Maybe she did prefer drunk you who'd follow her orders with no protests.
You looked back at the sea, the sun even lower than before, a type of golden shining on the blues that reminded you of a certain someone's earrings and oh, there it was.
Your thoughts slowly getting consumed by the moss head who despite drinking so much to forget was so embedded deep into your memory and probably heart at this point that even the slightest similarity you saw, be it colors or flowers, reminded you of him. 
Ah, that's love and all its magical stuff am I right? 
Sighing, she made her way back to where the rest of them were, the crew picking up on her presence,
"Where's Y/N? Weren't you bringing them?" 
"Well, for one they are SHIT face drunk, I don't think they are even conscious of where they are right now so I'll need to take them to bed but also, I can't carry them alone." 
She rolled her eyes at the stupidity of drowning yourself in your feelings, quite literally but she knew she wouldn't complain to the rest of them or more so she couldn't.
"Well I'm sure, one of us can help-"
"I'll help you carry them." Zoro interrupted your captain who was just about to suggest him. If there was one who could probably carry anything heavy too, it was him of course. 
Nami eyed him curiously, she did know he wasn't ready to do…kind deeds, not unless it helped him in some way. Though, she thinks, you may just be an exception.
He stood up and walked towards where you were, which was at the back, Nami followed suit to which he turned towards her.
"It's alright if you don't come, I'm pretty sure I'll be able to carry them myself." He said it and Nami narrowed her eyes, half out of suspicion and half out of spite after hearing the cocky undertone to his words. 
Proving that was one corner of his lips being turned upwards, forming an annoyingly handsome smirk that if you saw it, you'd probably be more on the brink of absolutely losing it.
"Take care of them and if they are hurt-" Zoro rolled his eyes at the over-exaggeration, and Nami knew that but as your best friend and a platonic soulmate at this point, she felt she had to say something. 
"I don't mean it that way, you know damn well what I mean." She told firmly, to which a slight confusion did flash in Zoro's eyes but he didn't make it obvious as he glared at her, ready to bicker.
"Nami!" Luckily, Luffy's timing seemed impeccable as he called her, to which she turned around, allowing no further talk.
Zoro just brushed off her words and moved to where you were.
Despite, Zoro admitting to never wanting a partner, it didn't mean though, that he didn't feel. 
He cared. He cared enough for Luffy to stick with him. He cared enough to fulfill a promise. 
And he cared for you too as he saw you sleeping soundly, laying your head on the ship, using your hands as a makeshift pillow. 
And yet, he somehow knew it was different. It was different from how he cared for others. 
He gulped as he moved closer, now being able to see your features being highlighted by the afterglow of the sun setting. 
It was as though you were the sun's favorite child at the moment, touching parts of your face softly, careful enough to not awaken you yet enough to rest on it to make it golden. 
The evening breeze couldn't have picked a better time to pass as strands of your hair messily moved, your face scrunching up in disturbance. 
He didn't even perceive how he'd reached you and was actually touching strands of your hair to push them back in place so as to not disturb your sleep. 
He wasn't even a gentle person, but he was using soft fingers with even softer touches to push them back. 
He figured he should in fact take you back to your bed, well shared bed with Nami. 
Deciding there was no need to wake you up, he moved beside you, putting one arm underneath your knees while the other looped just above your waist and below your chest. 
You blinked open your eyes when you felt yourself floating, it seemed like you were floating for a brief second, engulfed by warm clouds and a nice pillow that was-
You looked up and saw the side profile of someone. 
They seemed familiar. 
A glint of gold caught your eye as you put your left arm up and poked the earring, giggling as you saw it move.
"Wow, pretty," You think you'd seen it but your eyes being hazier than before after your mini nap seemed to only make your vision more blurry.
The sudden exhale and whisper down his neck almost made Zoro trip as he didn't really expect you to be up.
He was just near your shared room.
"Where are you taking me? Who are you?" You asked the important questions now, your mushed brain being able to form somewhat coherent thoughts. 
"You- you don't know who I am?" He asked you, confusion in his features and then remembering why you were lost. 
Right, practically wasted. And apparently memory loss due to being wasted.
He pushed the door open, as flimsy as it was, careful to not eventually break it down.
You looked around your surroundings, now even more lost as to where you actually were.
You squealed as he let you down, immediately realizing it was a terrible idea when you almost toppled over, unable to hold your own weight as he pushed his arm around your waist.
You held onto the man's shirt as you tried not to trip and fall.
"Here I'll just- I'll get you to bed." He guided you towards your bed, hand still wrapped around your waist as he looped yours over his neck. 
You plopped down with your eyes shut, your head began spinning when you almost tripped and you groaned in regret.
"Drinking too much was such a bad idea, like all my decisions lately." You put your hand on your forehead as you tried to rub the forming headache away. 
Hearing a walking sound, you peered your eyes open. Half-open anyways as you still couldn't make out well anything.
You could see the supposed stranger who'd help you till your bed was going to turn around and likely go but at that moment, you decided you didn't really want to be…alone.
Grabbing his hand before he moved away, you pulled him back with all your force. It didn't phase his movements much though other than him halting. 
Zoro turned back to you after deciding he should probably leave before he either said something he'd regret or worse, did something he'd regret. 
It wasn't his fault though with how…cute you looked as you plopped down, making him want to ki-
"Stay…please." You whispered to him, still holding onto his wrist as you blinked at him.
A familiar green color sat on top of his head but you figured it was a common color despite being sober you absolutely made fun of it when you could about how uncommon it was but also whined about how unfairly good it looked on him. 
The same him who looked at you in confusion and disbelief,
"You want me to stay, right now? With you?"
“Of course! I feel quite alone right now, maybe the company will make me feel better here.” You let go of his arm, the loss of your colder hand in contrast to his warm skin making him slightly frown. 
You pointed at your chest, surprisingly getting it right this time by pointing toward your left side.
He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, “Does your chest hurt or something?” 
There was a slight concern in his tone, one which made you giggle. 
“Not- not physically silly, it’s- it’s my heart, it feels like it’s been gutted- wait no too- too gruesome, it feels like someone just punched it and it broke.” As you blubbered about your heartbroken state, your words made him more curious and concerned.
He decided he should probably hear you out, after all despite not being a great talker, he’d consider himself a decent listener. 
Grabbing the barrel you used as a chair placed under your makeshift desk, he moved to sit beside your bed. 
“It’s ridiculous. I should have known there was no chance, but it isn’t like you get a choice sometimes on how you should feel about someone, it just…happens.” You spoke softly, as Zoro turned his attention toward you, wondering who was this person who’d caused you to feel so…sad. 
He didn’t realize it but he felt a slow anger build up, one he excused as frustration due to your mumbling but not one out of simply, probably, jealousy.
Yes, he was jealous of….this person because it sure as hell seemed as though you were deeply in love to have been feeling like this. 
Ironic.
“Why do I even like him?” Oh, he definitely did not want to hear you talk about him, he decided.
Screw being a good listener, he was already in a crisis when Luffy put him on the spot asking about whether he’d want a lover or not, and then him trying his best not to divert his gaze towards you, so instead he chose an option ( one he’d regret later on ) and gave a seemingly believable answer. 
Maybe a while ago, he’d have stuck to that answer, and actually no, he was sticking to it, quite well too.
That was until you stumbled onto the crew or more like in true Luffy fashion, were persuaded enough to stay. 
At first, he didn’t care enough. It was more so he didn’t particularly like you too. You were what he was not. Careless, overly enthusiastic at times, and way too optimistic for your own good. You looked to see the good in everyone, believing that there was always some sort of goodness in everyone.
Zoro found that stupid, knowing how reality was always different. Everyone is and will always be selfish for their own greed. He was too, he wanted to fulfill his promise and that was it. 
That was his goal and nothing else really mattered to him.
It’s what he thought would remain the same till he accomplished it but a sudden diversion came in the form of well…you.
He didn’t even realize it but the annoyance he’d get when he heard your lame jokes turned into him looking away from your silly smile to try and hide his own forming grin.
How he’d always automatically be looking for you if they’d stop at an island, choosing to follow you and dismissing Nami’s suspicious glances by saying you’d likely do something stupid that might put everyone in danger if left alone.
It was funny what this could make anyone feel. He didn’t ever feel like this, he didn’t even want to admit he was close to feeling but how long could a person remain in denial?
He was in love with you. 
He couldn’t simply excuse his heart racing at your presence as simply annoyance, he couldn’t excuse finding pretty flowers and them reminding him of you as well….yeah you get the point. 
That revelation honestly made him spiral into a sort of existential crisis. 
So he decided it was best to do one thing.
Ignore it. Ignore everything and simply wait until it all fades away. 
But silly him, he didn’t know one thing about love and he assumed it was something that fades away, yet there it was, in his gaze as it softened and in his heart as it sunk slowly like an anchor. 
Clogging his throat as if he couldn’t simply breathe when you admitted to being in love with someone, someone who wasn’t him.
Ah love and its magical stuff, yet why does he feel like it's more of a curse right now? 
He opened his mouth, and closed it again, resembling a fish and it felt like he wanted to say everything yet nothing.
They probably don’t deserve you. 
The thought resonated in his head, but really who was he to say so because did someone like you even deserve him?
Turning to face him completely, ducking your hand under your head, you blinked at him slowly, a grin forming on your face as you saw the stranger’s hair.
“You…you remind me of him, your hair, it’s that ugly color.” You softly giggled to which Zoro was left in yet a contradiction of emotions, whether or not he should feel offended or light over the sound of your soft giggles. 
Wait. 
“Come closer, I’ll tell you a secret.” He blinked at you, trying not to show any emotions and wondering if you’d ever even talk to him like this sober.
Deciding to follow what you said, something he’d never do if you were sober, he leaned in, putting one arm as support to hold him due to the slightly uncomfortable position. 
“I- don’t laugh at me first of all, it’s ridiculous, Nami says I’m being too much of a coward not saying it upfront.” You looked at him to which he nodded, in your mind you presumed it was reassurance and agreeing to not find you ridiculous.
Somehow, despite you not knowing who was in front of you, your heart was picking up in pace and you felt a slight nervousness, actually, you almost felt like throwing up.
As if you were just about to actually…
“I think, actually no, I am definitely in love with Zoro.”
…confess to Zoro. 
Good thing, Zoro had quick reflexes because he felt his arm slip and if it weren’t for those quick reflexes, he’d have fallen face-first into the ground. He sat up straighter as if what he heard had physically burned him. 
“It sounds ridiculous, falling in love with someone like him but he’s actually a very loveable person, at least once he begins to get more…more comfortable around you. He talks less, shows emotions or any reactions even less, always carrying around a bitch face- Nami says so- but-but he also cares through his actions like-like that one time he found Luffy’s straw hat when he thought he lost- he spent hours helping him look for it and trying to keep Luffy from crying and then, then this other time he stayed up all night when I got hurt and wasn’t able to sleep. And-and there’s sooo many other times he’s done, the small things, he cares for that.”
“You know. I think that was when I knew I loved him.  When he didn’t need to stay up, yet he did to make sure I didn’t die or something.” You finished with a soft giggle as memories of that day flashed in front of your closed eyes. 
Suddenly he felt way warmer than the room was. 
“I know, I know you’ll…you’ll call me stupid for loving someone who’s already in fact rejected me, not-not to my face of course but indirectly I suppose.”
Wait, what?
Rejected you?
How could he do that when- when he didn’t-
“I hate this! I hate the way I feel, it- it’s making me feel pathetic.” Your words slurred as you whined, using your makeshift pillow to groan into.
“Who said love is magical? It’s pathetic! It makes you stupid enough to have stupid hopes that only make you fly high until suddenly the actual reality crashes you down hard.” You spoke somberly, your words slowly fading out as you gave into the alcohol-induced sleep.
“Love is…pathetic. But- but I love him. So much. I love…you.” The last word came out as a hush as you exhaled, shutting your eyes and letting go of the pillow as you finally got knocked out. 
It pained him to see you call yourself pathetic…all while being the reason you felt that way. 
Zoro was conflicted. The contradiction of emotions making him all do,
Nothing. 
He was frozen. He couldn't say a word, couldn't raise his hand to rub your back to perhaps comfort you. 
His mind was in more chaos, your words replaying like a loop. 
And finally, he came to a conclusion.
I need a drink. Fuck, maybe even three. 
Perhaps if you were awake, it’d be a different reaction. Perhaps if you weren’t drunk, you’d have not said it. 
The idea of you then getting over him, probably because you’d think he rejected you indirectly due to his words. This left a more bitter aftertaste in his mouth and mind than the beer he just downed.
He left your side, deciding he needed a breather to process what he’d just been told. He made sure you’d be in a comfortable position, placing your arms to your sides and even draped a sad excuse of a blanket, one that you brought yourself of an old woman when you had stopped at an island and one you loved, sad excuse because it was very thin but apparently you couldn’t sleep without it. 
He had turned back to you, one more time, about to say something but he just sighed and turned around, walking away to where he was now. 
Now, almost halfway through the crate of beers, he still couldn’t get rid of the confusion. 
Did- did you mean it?
It was conflicting because for one you said it under the influence, maybe you’d even meant someone else and just said his name by mistake. He hated that, so he chose to focus on you saying it solely for him. 
“Why-just why are you trying to die of alcohol poisoning? What is up with you idiots drinking like maniacs today?” A voice said in both disgust and concern as she walked up beside him, facing the sea, and then looking at him, the concern being evident as she saw the conflict of emotions on his face.
She knew he wasn’t one to speak up, it was rather his body language and eyes that spoke what he felt. 
He just sighed, taking a smaller sip of the drink, placing both arms on the side of the ship, and observing the waves.
Nami truly wondered what could have happened until she realized. 
“Did something happen with Y/N?” She cooly asked, observing his expression and surely enough a change of emotion was seen with the way he suddenly stiffened up.
“Nothing remarkable–”
“Oh cut the crap Zoro, you look like someone stole your fucking swords and threw them into the sea.” 
Now he turned towards her, a slight look of horror while he narrowed his eyes at her,
“That’s oddly specific.”
“Won’t deny anything. But, don’t change the topic.”
“They told’ you something?” She figured she should just straight up ask it, put it out in the blue, out of the bad.
Zoro contemplated whether he should spill it, feeling like maybe it would be invading your privacy but even if he didn’t want to admit it, he needed some sort of advice. 
“They- uh told me they lo- well see-” He shifted his attention back to the sea, finding it hard to say it to her face without giving away much. 
Technically you confessed but also you didn’t? You ranted about being in love with Zoro and how you wished you didn’t, you did that thinking you were spilling it to a stranger but it was the man himself so is that a confession? 
“So they finally did it?” He turned towards her raising his eyebrows in question, “They confessed?” 
Now he was surprised but how accurate she was, “ They are too coward- no offense- to do it while sober so ‘figured from the way you look like” She pointed towards his face with her finger “They either kissed you, which doesn’t seem evident from your face not being smothered with lipgloss, they confessed.” 
He gulped from his active imagination flashing a picture of you kissing him and how-
“But why are you so freaked out then? Shouldn’t you be happy your silly little crush is mutual?”
“It wasn’t a confession. More like a rant, they thought I was someone else and they basically spewed it all, and wait what do you mean mutual- I don’t uh-”
“Oh don't give that bullshit now. I know- in fact, even a blind person could see how in love you are with them.” 
Zoro didn’t know whether to get offended or embarrassed if it were really that obvious. He exhaled heavily, clearly not satisfied with the situation still. 
“What if they don’t even remember? What if they begin to ignore me because they think I don’t like them?” 
“Well you did say you weren’t looking for a partner or so on, did you forget that idiot?” Nami shook her head as she rolled her eyes at him.
“I-well- It wasn’t intentional! I panicked!”
“And now this is your consequence. Though there’s a simple solution to this crisis which isn’t a crisis actually, it’s pretty straightforward.”
Now he was curious, a way to solve this whole catastrophe? 
“Since you think they’ll forget by morning, how about you confront them then?”
“In the morning, you clear out your feelings before you dumbasses end up avoiding each other to purposefully brush this aside and I swear! I swear if it gets awkward because you both won’t look past your egos, I’ll force you into the damn cabin and lock you there to talk.”
Nam smiled sweetly, yet a threat underlined beneath her final words and Zoro thought of the only thing he should do now.
“Fine then.”
“I’ll talk. I’ll…confess to everything.”
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bradshawsbitch · 2 years
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little wallflower | bradley bradshaw x hearing impaired!reader
disclaimer: hello all. i wrote this for all of my lovelies who have loss of hearing, or have any type of hearing impairment, or am hearing and want to read a cute little fic. i myself am hearing, and i took a bit of inspiration from me being bradley, seeing as i work with a wonderful person who's deaf, and they are SO helpful and encouraging in my journey to get better at signing. if there are any inaccuracies, i apologise profusely - i tried my best to research what i could. seeing as i'm not american, i am learning ssl, and hope that I got the american signs right. please tell me what you think?&lt;3
warnings: ignorance about hearing disabilities (nothing malicious at all, just good ol' norm thinking), bob being the mvp and a sweetheart, cursing. no use of y/n.
word count: 2.5K.
description: Bradley had seen you sitting on your own many times, and was bewildered as to why no one was talking to you.
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Bradley had noticed you a few times, often sitting by yourself nursing a beverage. Sometimes you were looking at your phone, and other times you were just observing the surroundings, smiling softly at the people who milled around. Bradley had never really seen you interact with anyone at all, except for ordering beverages from Penny, and then you always showed her your phone - something that puzzled Rooster a little. Perhaps you wanted to see if she had a particular drink that wasn’t too easy to get ahold of? Either way, he was enthralled by you. The way your soft smile lit up your face, and the way you seemed to be a little bit of a wallflower intrigued him. He also found himself wondering why you were always sitting alone. He’d only seen you once with another person, a friend who was gesticulating as you laughed - it was a very pretty sound, he decided, before he was ripped away by Payback to play pool.
Bradley always walked into the Hard Deck thinking that this would be the night he’d go over and talk to you - ask what you were drinking, where you were from, if you’d like to go out with him… but every time he chickened out, afraid that such a pretty person wouldn’t want a ruddy naval aviator who smelled of jet fuel and couldn’t stay in one place for too long. He kept his distance for a few weeks, stealing longing glances whenever he could.
One day, as he was sipping his beer slowly, Phoenix approached him with a roll of her eyes “When are you gonna make a move, Rooster? You’ve been staring for weeks,” she inquired, raising a brow at her friend.
“Make a move? Rooster?” Hangman smirked, letting his sentence hang in the air to rattle Rooster a little “who are we talking about?” Jake continued, his eyes scanning the filled bar. Natasha nodded her head towards you, and Hangman followed her gaze.
“Oh them? Don’t bother Rooster, they completely ignored me the other day. Wouldn’t even respond to my question,” this had Bob scoffing out an uncharacteristic laugh, that sounded somewhat like he was telling Jake that he was being an idiot. Hangman furrowed his brows, looking at Bobs’ smiling face “what’s with him?” He muttered as the WSO went up to get another bottle of water.
Rooster simply shrugged, watching you make your way over to the bar, near where Bob was stood.
“C’mon Roos, go talk to them!” Phoenix gave him a gentle push in your direction, and Bradley could feel butterflies thrash around his midsection as he cleared his throat before approaching you. You seemed to be deep in thought, waiting for Penny to help Bob with his order.
Standing next to you, Rooster looked down and smiled at you, before saying hi. You didn’t seem to notice at all, and Bradley suddenly wondered if perhaps Jake was right - you completely ignored him. Now, Rooster thought of himself as well raised - he didn’t want to touch you without your consent, but he also didn’t want to give up, even though being ignored was a pretty big sign you weren’t exactly interested.
He had to, though - he had to hear you say you weren’t interested before he gave up. So he reached out gingerly, only hesitating for a second before softly tapping your shoulder. You jumped as if you hadn’t noticed him standing there at all, and as you turned to look at him, your eyes had turned wide with surprise.
“Hi, I’m so sorry. I’m Rooster— I mean, my name’s Bradley, but uh I’m called Rooster by— uh… I was just wondering if I could buy you a drink?” He was rambling. Since when didn’t he know how to speak to a beautiful person? He could hear Bob barely containing his laughter behind him, and he had to fight the sudden urge to throw an elbow back to shut him up. You blinked, opening and closing your mouth a couple of times, with a pained expression. Damn. He’d blown it. He sighed and nodded slowly “I get it, sorry to have bothered you,” he felt dejected as he turned to leave, but stopped as he felt your hand on his wrist, and heard a sound that resembled “No”. It was soft, and little too quiet to actually make it audible in the loud, boisterous environment you were in.
He turned back, looking at you quizzically as you lifted a finger into the air - signalling him to wait as you tapped away on your phone. A frustrated noise left your throat as you scrambled to find the notes app you’d installed on your phone.
“They can’t hear you,” Bob spoke up from behind Rooster, coming to stand beside his pilot friend. Bradley looked at him, bewildered - what did that mean? Bob quickly waved a hand in front of your face, and Rooster slapped his arm - what the fuck was he doing? That was rude as hell. Bob only shook his head and laughed at Bradley’s exasperated look.
As you looked up, Bob smiled at you before signing with his hands swiftly. Rooster took in how your facial expression went from relieved to elated, smiling as you replied with your hands.
“Do you want me to translate what my idiot friend said?” Bob spoke softly as he signed, making that beautiful laugh fall from your lips again. Oh my god, Rooster thought, both he and Hangman were fucking idiots. You couldn’t hear them. He almost groaned at his ignorance.
He thought of himself as a man that was very ‘with it’. He considered himself a feminist, he thought everyone should be treated the same and that no person held any particular advantage over any other - he felt that people could believe in what they wanted and say what they wished as long as it didn’t hurt or put others at risk. But he had actually never really ransacked himself about his knowledge about hearing disabilities, which he felt slightly ashamed over now.
He watched you nod with a big grin, and he had to trust that Bob translated what he said (favourably, he hoped, perhaps Bob would take pity on him and wouldn’t translate into ASL how he’d fumbled it all). He watched you furrow your brow as Bob signed something that Bradley could only guess was “Rooster”, tapping his forehead twice with his thumb, his middle finger and pointer finger forming a V. He couldn’t be sure, but it made sense in his mind.
You locked eyes with him and his heart stuttered a bit as you smiled, repeated the sign Bob had made to his forehead and softly spoke “Rooster?” And then pointed right at him.
“They’re asking if you’re called Rooster” Bob smiled, he didn’t doubt that Bradley had surely understood, but Bob could tell that Rooster felt a little frozen under your gaze - and he figured he’d help kickstart this conversation by breaking Bradley’s little trance.
“Oh, yeah! I’m Rooster. Or Bradley.” He looked at you and then Bob before hesitantly trying to copy the sign they had made. You laughed and moved closer, adjusting his hand so it was at the correct angle before nodding at him with a big smile. Oh god, those butterflies came back with a vengeance having you standing so close to him.
“How do you sign ‘thanks’?” Rooster almost panicked, looking at Bob - was he being rude by asking Bob instead of you? Bob just smiled and put his fingertips, his palm open but not spread, to his chin before sliding it outwards ‘thank you’ he said softly. Rooster repeated the sign to your smiling face, and he felt as if he could stare at the way your eyes twinkled happily forever. It made his heart clench.
“I’m sorry that I assumed you could hear me,” Bradley said and watched as Bob made a fist, circling it in the middle of his chest before signing something else that was too fast for Bradley to differentiate. You just smiled at him and shook your head, Bradley took that to mean “don’t worry about it”, your facial expressions were so vivid and beautiful to him.
You signed rapidly to Bob for a few moments, holding your phone out briefly before you stopped. Bob smiled and turned to Rooster “They say they’re pretty good at reading lips, and that you two can use the notes app or texts if they can’t understand. You’re on your own now, pal” Bob smiled, patting Bradley’s shoulder.
“Bob, thank you so much. I had no idea you knew how to sign!” Bradley sighed, really feeling surges of gratitude to the WSO. Bob smiled before replying that his parents couldn’t hear, and he learned to sign and talk at the same time.
“That’s fascinating,” Rooster replied with a smile as you signed something to Bob that made him laugh. “What did they say?” Bradley asked eagerly, and Bob shook his head. “They said they appreciated me translating, but that they had a hard time with my accent” Bob smiled at Roosters bewildered face.
“I’ll educate you later. Have fun, man!” He simply said before retreating to the pool table. You took a hold of his hand gingerly, and Bradley felt his heartbeat pick up slightly at the feeling of your warm skin against his.
Making your way to the table you’d occupied earlier, he sat down opposite you. He felt a little out of his depth at first, talking whilst your eyes flickered between his lips and his eyes - but as he got more used to you taking a moment to write down a reply, or speaking shorter sentences in response, he felt as he would with any other person. He just wished he could sign as efficiently as Bob did, it would make everything so much easier for you. He wanted to learn how to sign so you wouldn’t have to concentrate so much on reading his lips. Why hadn’t he learned from the jump? It seemed silly now that not everyone was taught sign language in school.
You spent the night in that booth, laughing and getting to know each other, finding that you had quite a lot in common. Bradley thought you were just the sweetest, and he tried his best to not offend you or ask stupid questions - though sometimes they slipped out anyways. Like when he asked what type of music you listened to. He could kick himself. He actually apologized profusely before he saw you shake your head before typing on your phone.
“I hear a little bit. They call my impairment ‘severe’, but I can still hear some loud noises, and I love music that has a lot of bass in it - I love the thrum of the melody it gives” you smiled kindly at him, and he smiled back, grateful that you didn’t seem to mind explaining the most obvious things to him.
“It’s okay to ask about, you know? I don’t mind if there’s anything else you’re curious about,” you’d typed in after a beat, showing him the screen. He read the words quickly, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth, speaking slowly he asked how it was that you spoke - could you hear yourself? He felt stupid asking, but your voice was so sweet and soft, he was puzzled as to how one could form words without hearing them.
You smiled, typing away on your phone. You’d apparently lost your hearing after having learnt to talk, which made it easier to maintain the feeling of speaking certain sentences and words. You explained you preferred sign language, just because you couldn’t tell if your volume was too loud or too quiet, which explained why you’d spoken so softly, not wanting to seem like you were shouting.
Bradley smiled, mesmerized about your abilities, and he told you so as well. He could tell you were blushing at his compliment and that made him smile all the wider. Suddenly you took hold of his hand and held it to your throat before typing a quick “I can tell somewhat from how the vibrations feel in my throat when I speak - but it’s hard to tell what volume it’s at” and then you said “Rooster” out loud with that sweet voice Bradley had already come to love, even if it didn’t sound like everyone else. Perhaps that’s why he liked it so much. He could feel the vibrations that thrummed in your vocal chords, and he smiled. He’d never thought about any of these things.
You lifted your hand, raising a brow as if to ask a question, and he nodded - you placed your hand on his Adam’s apple. He laughed before saying that he thought you were beautiful. You smiled, looked down and blushed again before clearing your throat and slowly saying “You have a nice voice,”
Bradley beamed at the compliment “Yeah?” You nodded before typing “I can tell” with a little wink. God, he was a goner.
All too soon, Penny announced last round - and he made sure to swap numbers with you. You emptied your drink and typed out “I had a great time tonight. I’ll text you?” You smiled uncertainly, and he typed back “So did I. Please do text me so I know you’ve gotten home safe?” You grinned and nodded before wrapping your arms around his neck in a parting hug, waving goodbye sweetly before making your way out of the Hard Deck.
“Wow,” Rooster let out a breath as he made his way back to his friends who were slow to make it to the front door. Making eye contact with Hangman, Bradley groaned and said “Hangman, we’re fucking idiots,”
“I don’t even want to talk about it,” Hangman replied with a similar type of “fuck I’m dumb” groan. Bob was silently laughing behind them “That was absolutely golden,” he sniggered, throwing his arms around their shoulders and shaking them “Just two dumb pilots, huh?” He and Phoenix laughed.
“Jesus,” Rooster shook his head. “Bob. This was 'Rooster', right?” He signed and Bob nodded, laughing again “and 'thank you'” he repeated what Bob had showed him earlier. The WSO smiled and nodded at his friends eagerness.
“Can you help teach me sign language, Bob? I’d love to be able to talk to them better” Bradley sighed, wishing he could learn it all right this second. Bob smiled, he could tell this meant a lot to his friend, so therefore he said
“Of course, Brad. We’ll start with the alphabet tomorrow"
3K notes · View notes
starillusion13 · 8 months
Text
KEEP IT A SECRET
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Pairing: stepbrothers! Jeno and Jaemin x f!reader
W.C: 13k (I want them please)
Genre: SMUT, YANDERE, STEP-CEST
Warnings: possessive behavior, restraining hint, manhandling(?), pervert!nomin, dom!nomin, biting, tiny bit of blood, sucking, crying, a bit of pain during it, nipple play, clit and tit stimulation, oral( f. Rec), lot of lot of overstimulation( 😉), double penetration, praising and name calling, raw penetration( don’t do irl guyz💀)
Network: @k-vanity @cultofdionysusnet
Note: please I want to thanks to people for reading and reblogging. Reviews are always appreciated 😭. Applause to the ones who come up to me to interact and they know how friendly I am. Okay enough!
MINORS LETS BE INNOCENT AND NOT INTERACT! Okay?🔞
*under the cue*
Stepbrothers are same as brothers, Right? Just you need to maintain a step away from them from being too close to them if you somehow feel uncomfortable or unwanted, afterall they are not related to you by blood. Yes, that’s what you have lectured yourself before coming to this grand house where you are sitting with bored eyes staring at the screen. You don’t even remember why you have come to the living room and sat there in first place but now regretting as to why you remained in that place instead of going to your room to find something more useful than facing the idiots who just entered through the big wooden door.
Your step-brothers. Maintain that step.
Since the first day, you came here after your beloved mother married her childhood best friend, your life is literally pathetic. Your parents never had that lovely little family couple relation in between them and you somehow hoped them to get separate and when you were in highschool, they finally parted their ways much to your liking. Somewhere, in the corner of your mind, you still missed that fatherly love and your mother did notice it as she also felt alone when seeing others being happy with their partners. After two months, her best-friend started coming to your house more often to check on both of you and your mother gladly welcomed him each and every time. Once, you eavesdropped on their conversation when coming back from school and then realized their life story.
Basically, they are those childhood sweethearts and had so many dreams to spend their life together. Unfortunate events led them to move apart and during those times, you mother was being married to your father and her lover went overseas for future plannings and under family's peer pressure, he also got married there. They didn’t have contact with each other until they again met at a fancy restaurant with their own little families. Somehow, they talked about their situation and accepted their fate. They again back to being friends. He somehow noticed that your mother was not happy in her life but what could he do when he was the one who left her to her miseries. When you were in primary school, her friend left for the states with his wife again and then again, she was never able to meet him. You don’t remember much about them from your childhood memories but when you met with your mother’s friend after your father left you, the memories flashes across your mind.
Never in your high school life, you ever thought of them getting married. You could see how she used to share every detail of her life with her friend and you were glad that she could talk about her problems to someone with whom she feels safe and most comfortable. That time, you also noticed that how her friend was meeting all alone with your mother instead of bringing his wife along, you didn’t think about it much but gradually you came to know that his wife was no more due to mishap. That was the main reason for them to reunite again and could find comfort within each other’s warmth. You were literally so happy for them, if they were more verbal to their family about their relationship then they could have lived a more blessed life since long ago but its okay, everything happens for a reason and maybe this reason could lead them to a better life. Eventually, after your completion of school, they brought up the topic about their marriage and surprisingly, you agreed with it instantly. You were happy to get a father who actually showed the fatherly love towards you and also you were thankful to him to love your mother so much.        
But maybe for you, two devils escaped from the hell that day. Girl, you didn’t know that the man who was building a paradise for you and your mother can also bring two devils of hell into that paradise. After marriage, when you three shifted to a different country, you came to know that your two lovely step-brothers are also shifting there to settle down with your family. First, you thought about getting two little brothers because you didn’t know in the first hand that he had child rather two sons and you hoped to see them but the next when you came to know about their age and they are handling all the business schedules and meetings of their father’s company, your head hit hard. Well they are the heirs of all your step-father’s company but now you are also part of it and you didn’t know it yet but the first introduction with your step-brothers and getting to know about the inheritance was not like how you expected.
“So, you are the pretty heir and the third inheritor of this huge property?”
“I am?....I don’t know about this.”
“Really? But dad has prepared every document for you and you are unaware of it? This is strange. If you are not here for the property then what the hell are you doing in my house?”
“Excuse me but this is my house as well. I am your sister so I should be here.”
Don’t forget you are just a step-sister.
“Interesting.”
A great physique wearing a white t-shirt complimenting each bump of the muscles and an eyebrow slit making his dark look more intimidating. His gaze was burning on your exposed skin and the aura radiating from him was so daring as well. That day, you knew that it was best to ignore the older one in that household because you feel so weak in front of that powerful presence around you. Somehow, you hoped for the other one to be a bit handful and friendly but unfortunately, it didn’t go like that. One day when your parents were out and only Jeno was there, chilling in the wide living area, you noticed it and made your way back to the garden family zone which is your favorite spot but not likely today. You just wanted to relax yourself in your room after having long classes in the university but you didn’t want to face your so called brother all alone in that mansion so until your parents were coming back, you opted to kill time in the garden. It was pretty much okay unless the other devil appeared in front of you disturbing your peaceful time.
“What’s a pretty baby doing here?”
This boy and his name calling.
“That’s none of your concern.”
“It is my concern when you are doing every possible stuff to ignore my brother. It hurts my feelings when you are avoiding that handsome brother of mine who can get every girl around here or anywhere even you…”
“What the hell? Just go away and let me relax.”
“Uh ah…NO. I cant let my one and only dear sister to be here outside in the late evening. Its getting dark and anything can happen when the surrounding falls black and its only you and me making the white spot.”
You could feel him leaning towards you slowly with each word falling from his mouth while kneeling in front of you to match your level sitting on a low rock seat. You pushed him when he fell back and balanced himself on his two hands, laughing at your flustered face which you were trying your best to hide from him.
“What type of bullshit you are saying? Get the fuck away Jaemin.”
“And if I don’t?”
“I will shout and tell that….that you are…you….I..I was..”
“Is my dear sister lost? Are you lost babygirl?”
His smirk is wide enough to fuel your anger more and your fist tight on your lap, nails digging in your palm, making the skin reddish all around. He stared at you for a while and stood up, dusting his pants while he could still feel the glares from you to which he had no effect rather he chuckled on the fact.
“What are you upto?”
“Nothing. Just go inside and don’t stay out. Jeno is just a human like you and me so he wont be feeding on you in the dinner.”
You frowned on his words and he smiled to your confused face and walked away. Did he just call himself and me at a same level? No way. I mean we are human but we both can't be same. He is that shitty human like his brother and the way Jeno always have a dark expression, you doubt that he might feed on you. Does your mother trust your new brothers so much that she left you alone with them? Stomping your feet, you walked into the house to find both of your brothers sitting on the sofa and laughing at their phone screen, maybe again watching some weird stuffs. You glanced towards the stairs and ran towards it when the not so lovely of your brother spoke up.
“What were you doing outside?”
“Didn’t Jaemin tell you that I don’t want to face you? Yes. I was avoiding you.”
You didn’t dare to look back to them, you were just hoping to escape the place that moment and lock yourself inside the room until your parents come back.
“And why?”
You didn’t speak anything but could feel both of their stares boring onto your back so you took some slow steps.
“I asked you something. Without entertaining my questions, you are again going away. Does our baby need some punishments to behave well?”
Hearing the last sentence, you ran to your room without caring what would happen next but you just made your strong opinion on not unlocking the door unless one of your parents come upstairs.
You are always been called out with endearments by Jaemin. He is the biggest flirt in the household. He might be the one with soft, playful and flirty nature but his intentions are always transparent and your parents appreciate his clinginess towards you. ‘Jaemin loves his sister so much. I am so glad they are getting along so well with each other.’
Well, only you know how that tease actually shows his brotherly love to you. He always has that intimidating lustful eyes following your every movement around the house and whenever you catch him for it, he would just simply give you his teasing smile and winks at you before walking away with smug look.
Whereas his brother Jeno, well you just know about him that however possible you need to avoid that individual because you cant read him like Jaemin. He always has that dark expression with clenched jaws and piercing eyes. When Jaemin’s stare feels like tickles on your skin like a winter warmth, Jeno’s eyes burn on your skin like a blazing sun in summer. The cold replies to your every question and whenever your parents are in front, he would watch you as if every mishap in the world is caused by you. Every reason is you for his life problems. You still don’t know whether he is happy with your presence or not and moreover it is okay for him to introduce you as his sister to everyone. Jaemin happily shows everyone that you belong to his family and Jeno just agree with him by nodding his head slightly but they never mentioned the actual relationship that you are their ‘stepsister’.
It's always ‘she is one of us’ or ‘she is our family’ for them.
“How was your Gym workouts my sons?”
“it was good mom.” Jaemin brightly smiled to his step-mom.
“Yeah it was.”
“Why are you so down Jeno? Are you tired?”
“He is just sulky mom. He is mad because he is not getting the appreciation he needs from his favorite person, you know.”
“Gym crush?”
“No… it’s-“
“Jaemin. You are going to shut up right now.”
 If Jeno’s glare could burn Jaemin then he would have turned into ashes that instant but maybe his sweats saved him and his laugh echoed throughout the dinning room. Your attention got averted towards the noise coming from the presence of three lovely beings conversing among themselves.
“Y/n. come and eat with us, you will be late for the outing.”
Your mother has called you many times to have the lunch because later this evening, you will be going out with your friends but before that you need to complete some assignments and your mother wont let you do so without you having the lunch on time.
“mom, told you that I’m not hungry. I will be in my room and if you need me just call me downstairs.”
Standing on your feet, you collected your ipad and phone from the sofa and made your way towards the stairs. The brothers shared a knowing look before speaking up and halting your steps.
“You are not leaving now.”
“Why is it your concern jeno?”
“This is our concern Y/n. You are our sister and skipping meals is not good for your health. Eat now. I will help with your assignments later so come here.”
“Jaemin you don’t have to.”
“Look. Your brothers are always taking care of you and this is so nice that he will also be helping you with your works.”
“But mom-“
“Y/n, don’t be stubborn.”
“Fine.”
As it had to be. You had your lunch with them, having some conversations from here and there. Your mother happily listened to your every word like usual but surprisingly your brothers were also interested in the topics. Even, Jeno stated some opinions regarding some issues and this is the first time, you felt grateful about his presence. He is not the type to have family time and moreover having conversations with any one of you other than his brother, Jaemin. Well, this other one is always a nosy one in everyone’s business so it’s natural to have him in the dining family times. During the whole lunch, you could feel two burning stares on your skin, your brothers stealing glances of you and your mother is always unaware of all these.
When going back to your room, you could feel someone is following you upstairs and you are well aware of the person, who it might be. Well, as he has promised earlier, he would definitely help you in your assignments. You didn’t mind him following but something about his stares, making you uncomfortable in your place.
Entering your room, you quickly head towards the table to gather all your required stuffs for the work while he made himself comfortable on the edge of your bed. His hands caressing the bedsheet and humming to himself with closed eyes.
“Where are you going anyways?”
You didn’t pick up his question as you are busy typing some texts in your group chat when you feel someone snatches your phone away from your grip and held it higher.
“What the hell? Give it back to me Jaemin. You are here to help me not to irritate me.”
“I was asking you a question but you just ignored me and was busy on this useless thing.”
“I was texting someone and I’m sorry that I didn’t hear you.”
He glanced to the phone in his hand, which was still raised above and squinting his eyes, he is trying to read the messages. You could see his raised eyebrows and tongue poking his cheeks.
“You are going out with all boys?”
“That’s not your issue.”
“Did mom allow you?”
“Oh gosh. Why are you asking so many questions? Are you going to help me now or not? If not then get the fuck out of my room.”
“What help do you need exactly?”
“huh?”
You are standing on your toes to match his level to get back your phone but your feet touched the floor on hearing his words. You should not feel like this but his tone is different than before and it’s a bit more seductive and you could feel him closing the distance between you both. You step back with every proceeding of his step towards you. You bumped on the chair in front of the desk and your hands grabbed the top of it tightly in the back, you are totally trapped. He leans forward and caged you, hands gripping the desk behind.
  “Wha…what..do you need?”
He leans to your ears and his hot breath fanning over it when he whispered.
“That’s really up to you. How do you need me?”
“I need…help…in my assignment.”
“yeah and?”
He stares at your eyes in a way as if he is trying to hipnotize you.
“and?”
“Answer the rest of the questions I have asked you. Be a good girl. Will you?”
He repeated his questions while caressing your cheeks and somehow you were leaning to his touch even when you know whatever you both are doing is wrong. This is not how a brother and sister treat each other.
“I am going out with my old friends who are in this town and they want to meet with me so I will be back late at night.”
He stares at you for a few moments as if he is processing your words. Suddenly, he comes near to your face to match your eye level, staring so deeply as if he could read your past life and can possess your soul anytime. You can feel his lips just a breath away from yours and this is the first time, you are so much close to your brother, well just a reminder step-brother. Tugging your hairs slowly behind your ears, his fingers sliding over your cheeks to feel every little detail of the texture, you closed your eyes on the impact. Your heart beat increasing with every passing second and you can feel him smiling at your current state. You are hoping to end this situation quickly like you can push him or just like any other time, you can just reply him back savagely but somehow your body not reacting to do any of this rather accepting him and letting him to have his ways with you. Your thoughts got interrupted when you could feel something warm on your lips. His lips. He kissed you. It was a quick kiss as if a dream which flickered in the daylight. He steps back and brushes his hair with a smug look as if he has achieved his thing which he desired for so long.
The room is quiet. Really quiet or maybe you are suddenly deaf to your surroundings. Your bedroom is quite big but still its suffocating you at the moment as if the walls are closing in and the daylight fading out, making you a completely abandoned soul in this lively household.
But your mind is screaming that YOUR STEPBROTHER HAS JUST KISSED YOU.
“Earth to Y/N.”
You were so distracted that you didn’t notice how your fingers are touching your lips as if you are judging whether those are real or fake or if it yours in the first place. Looking over to the person, you can see him already has arranged everything for your work and smirking at you, sitting on the bed. As if nothing happened just few seconds back.
“….Jaemin…why….”
“Don’t you need my help anymore? You know I can help you in every possible way but till then lets focus on this. Come here.”
How can you just go near him again after what happened earlier? But him pretending like this as if he didn’t kiss his sister few minutes earlier and now like a big brother offering his help for homework for his little sister. With slow steps, you went near the side of the bed to which he pats the space beside him and hesitantly, you sit there.
One and a half hour has passed with you being stuck with him in your room doing your assignment. Every moment was torturing you as if every minute was passing like an hour with him. His every lingering touch was igniting a spike inside you like while him showing you how to solve a math problem and while peeking into the laptop, his palm resting over your exposed leg, your mind was focusing on everything except your work. You were trying your best to divert your mind from all the unholy thoughts that were going across your mind every second, but nothing was helping when his presence was so close to you.
“I know what you are thinking right now but only if you didn’t have to go out with your friends then we could have done something you know.”
“What?”
“You know what I meant?”
You just want to punch off that smirk from his face but you don’t want to create more memories of spending time with him for so long for the first time in your room so you just have to patiently handle the situation right now.
“Jaemin, the thing for which you were here is done so now you can go out because I have to get ready. Its not like you can help me in that.”
“I can.”
“Very funny.”
His smug look changes into a dark expression and you swear, him in this contrast look is something which scares you off the most even scarier than Jeno. That one has always that grumpy and intense look so you are used to it but when this flirt becomes like him, a shiver runs down your spine. His soft expressions always hide those bulky muscled body with veins on display on hands and necks. You never had a proper look of their abs but you hope to see the effects of the gym though. Like whenever, they swipe their hairs after having fun in the swimming pool, you would always stare at their muscles and face but you just divert your eyes whenever the abs come in display to you. Your fault to miss the free shows.
“Nothing is funny here baby. As I said I would help you means I will definitely. Now show me what you got baby.”
“Jaemin-“
He walks over to your closet and before you could protest, he slides open the door standing there with raised eyebrows and smiling face.
“You have quite a good collection of……everything.”
You hurriedly go in front of him and shut it close on his smirking face, eyes scanning your body to which you just glared him back. But well Jaemin didn’t budge to it, he goes to the next door and now it revealed the actual dress section not your lingerie and undies.
You observed his actions keenly to understand his motives. You can see him having his whole focus into your closet and you walk over to the bed to sit on it and watch him. Is it because of the kiss or for spending so much time with him that suddenly you are finding his whole existence as a blessing in your life?
His pretty eyelash making his eyes more attractive when they are focused on anything. His smooth skin with attractive nose and lips with that pretty smile. Did I just mention his smile pretty? Well not gonna lie however that smile irritates you but you find it really cute, a healing one. Your university friends have mentioned about your stepbrothers being so hot and handsome and they even pointed out that if they were in your place, they might have ended up dating them instead of maintaining the brother and sister image. But you are sure that those things are never going to happen between you and your stepbrothers maybe because you might find them attractive but its not like that’s the same from their end. Right?
“Take this. Give me a show and let me see in which one you will look the prettiest.”
“Are you serious right now?”
“100 percent.”
He is standing in front of you with few clothes in his hands and as far as you can see those are some skirt, shirt, tees, one denim jeans and two dresses. The way he is grinning at you as if he is an elementary school boy who got his long-awaited present. Wait. He got his present. What the hell I am thinking?
“There is no need of this. I can choose myself.”
Putting the clothes beside you, he holds your hand to pull you up on your feet and pats your cheek with both the hands, still having that smile on his face.
“Be a good girl or you wont be going out today. Alright?”
“You cant be serious.”
“Till the time I’m being nice to you just go with it or you have to regret it.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well I will not look while you are changing so after you have dressed yourself in one, ask me to turn around.”
“But-“
“What did I just say?”
“…okay…”
He went over to your desk and sat on the chair with one hand leaning over the desk and other hand handling the phone, keeping himself busy. You kept standing near the other side of the bed still staring at the clothes lying over your bed. Am I really going to do this? What did he mean by being nice and you have to regret? Shaking off your thoughts, you cautiously dressed yourself in the skirt and a matching shirt he has selected with it. His every little movement was making you freeze in your spot. Changing your dress in presence of your step-brother in closed room is really challenging even more when he kissed you earlier. You look over to the mirror and damn, he has a good sense in fashion. You smiled to your outfit and then remember that you have to ask him to turn around.
Gulping, you call out his name, “jae-Jaemin…I’m ready.”
He quickly swivels on the chair to face you and eyes directly made a strong contact with yours before scanning your outfit. His furrowed eyebrows and thoughtful expression making you to adjust your dress properly.
“No. Change it. Keep the shirt on but wear the jeans.”
Before turning around, he winks at you. Your glare was digging hole in the back of his head but it was useless as he would not budge with that little thing.
“Stop glaring at me and change. Do it fast. I’m sure, you don’t want to be late or like miss out today’s outing.”
He is still turning his back to you but you could feel his smug look mocking at you. Kicking your feet, you quickly changed your skirt with the pant. The previous look was giving off a sexy and cute look altogether but this one is suggesting tumblr fashion. Calling out his name again, he stands up and comes near to you. Your heart starts racing with the thought what happened when last time he came to you like this.
“stop there.”
But he didn’t.
“I said stop. Don’t come near to me.”
He again ignored and when he is just a feet away. His hand goes to the button of your pant. Your eyes go wide and hands reacting fast enough to hold his but he was faster than you. Swatting your hands away, he pulls the zipper up.
“What? Did you think I am going to do something to you? Aha not like this. Or maybe you thought…..” He leans to your ears, “ I will kiss you again.”
He steps back and precisely takes a look of your form. Nodding to himself, he pats your head and your confused expression made a chuckle out of him.
“That’s looking good on you. You are going out with all boys and I cant trust them. Maybe they can be your old friends but without having contacts with them for so long and you don’t know how would they behave later so better be like this.”
“It’s not like for them I need to dress up accordingly.”
“of course not. You can wear anything when either me and Jeno is there with you but not when you will be all alone.”
“Why is it okay with both of you?”
“I can fight with others for you. Jeno will do the same.”
Going over to the dressing table, you pulled out all the make up kit while talking with him and him admiring your every features as if you are his treasured person. Maybe you are.
“Jeno would rather sell me to them rather than fighting for me.’
“You are wrong there baby. Absolutely wrong. He would burn the world for you but never let any harm on you.”
“Anyways I will leave you here. Do your makeup and have fun tonight but not too much. Remember about what I have told you.”
You keep on staring at your reflection on the mirror with shiny edges after he shuts the door behind, leaving your room. His words clouding all over your mind and his actions playing repeatedly making you groan in frustration. All these types of situations are not usual between the relationship between a brother and a sister and whatever is going to happen later, you must face it with your confidence and true feelings. Patting your cheeks to get yourself off these overthinking and resume your makeup. It took almost one hour when you finished your makeup, its not like you were doing any heavy look but the problem was you were continuously getting distracted when the thought of Jaemin playing across your mind. Glancing at the clock, its almost six in the evening and you should probably leave right now to be there on time. Collecting all the necessary stuffs, you made your way downstairs. Adjusting your smart watch, a message popped up that few have arrived on the location and you need to be there soon.
“Are you ready? Let’s go.”
“Hm….wait!...you? Where are you going?”
“To the place you are going.”
“Why?”
Rolling his eyes, he slides his jacket and fishes his phone inside the pocket of his jeans. Frowning you, still staring at him as if why he is tagging along with you to the place. Before exiting the house, he finds you still standing at the same spot and staring back at him, he rolls his eyes before stepping towards you. Your panic arises watching him coming towards you, you tried to think some possible attempts to escape it but before you could do anything, he catches your wrist and drags you towards the door.
“Jeno…What are you doing?”
“Stop being dramatic. I’m just taking you to your friends.”
“I can go on my own. You… you don’t have to…take me there.”
Reaching near the garage, he takes you to his car. The person whose presence, you try to avoid with every possibility and now you will be riding a car with him. Jaemin has given you ride to and from college a lot of times and that’s how some thought that he was your boyfriend and even Jaemin always has that smug expression on hearing those comments. But you never went anywhere alone with Jeno and if your heart could burst today, it should by now because of the events unfolding after the lunch. Jeno is texting on his phone and your eyes following how his clenched jaws moving with veins popping at the side profile, on his neck disappearing behind the collar of the jackets. He caught you staring at him and that smirk made an appearance on his attractive and sharp face. But. Wait, he is really attractive, a lot more handsome than you have thought of him before. Any girl should drool over this man if he ever proposes them. Maybe you too if he was not your brother, well step-brother.
With slow steps as if he is the predator cornering his prey. Why suddenly they are like this today? I should probably stay at my friend’s house tonight. You try to open the door of the car but to your dismay, it got stuck, you shake it aggressively but it didn’t budge.
“It will break like this. It’s locked sweetheart.”
“Oh…”
You have not turned around but could feel his presence just behind you. Your back flushed against his front. His hands resting against the car, caging you in between, lips near your ears, hot breath tickling your lobe, goosebumps spreading all over your skin.
“Why you always ignoring me?”
You remained quiet. Fingers tangling with the strap of the sling bag in nervousness and his strong smell of cologne hitting your nose clouding your every attempt to push him and run away as you are going to be late.
His one hand grabs your jaw to turn your face to meet your eyes. His eyes blinks to your lips before raising up to meet yours which is covered with glittery makeup.
“I asked you something. You should answer it right?”
You nod to his raised eyebrows.
“Words sweetheart.”
His husky voice and him so close to your body is enough to make you weak in your knees.
“I am not ignoring you.”
“Don’t lie. I don’t like when you lie. Its very obvious how you always leave the scene whenever I come near you but still you are okay with Jaemin.”
“Jeno…I…I’m late…I need to go.”
“Dammit. Look, you are trying to avoid me again. You always have these excuses to avoid me. Why? Am I worse than jaemin?”
He turns you around, pushing you against the car, still caging you between his arms. Eyes daringly staring at you, veins more visible on his forehead and around his throat and neck. You got the chance to have a look of this handsome face so closely for the first time and you are already getting attracted to it even when your consciousness is screaming ‘he is your stepbrother.’
“He might be always sweet to you and shows his flirty side to you but mark my words, he is worse than me. You don’t know what he can do if he ever gets a chance to get you alone and fuck you. His mischievous innocent smile hides all his nasty thoughts and his devil side from you.”
“What are you saying jeno?”
“Don’t pretend that you don’t know how you always tease us when roaming around the house like a little slut you are. It’s good that Jaemin has decided your outfit otherwise who knows what you have worn to meet all those shitheads.”
“Excuse me, they are my friends.”
He steps back and pulls you towards him making you bump into his front. The sound from the car, indicating the unlock of your ride made a surprised squeal from you. Pulling the door open, he offers you to enter his car.
“Have a seat princess. We have a little way to go.”
Without wasting any time, you hurriedly go inside it and shut the door to which he chuckles on your little attempt. He strikingly walks towards the other side to enter the driver seat and as soon as he enters, he brushes his hair, looking in the rear mirror. Gulping, you cast a glance to him and well you find it really attractive whenever one of your brothers do this. Afterall both of them are just walking models.
As soon as you both make an eye contact in the mirror, he smirks and you look out of the window to avoid his gaze.
“How much you try, You are stuck with me inside this little space.”
Leaning towards you, supporting his hand on your seat and the other on the steering wheel.
“You have nowhere to go except appreciating my presence.”
“Jeno…what are you doing?”
He pulls the seat belt before you protest to his further attempts to do anything, fixing it properly, he sighs and smirks at you. As he goes back to do the same for him, you release a heavy breath to the thought that nothing happened like Jaemin.
You remained quiet the whole ride and did your best to keep yourself busy on the phone to avoid any conversation with him. But Jeno is not the one to keep it this way as finally he got the chance with you and that’s also all alone in his car. He kept you asking few questions and when you denied to reply him back, everytime he slides his hands up and down your thighs.
“Don’t be a bad girl, princess.”
The ride to your destination was quick as you all were going to meet in the nearest mall to hangout and have fun with catching up all the gossips you are missing out. He didn’t park the car because he has to go to the office to meet his dad after dropping you off at your place.
“Thanks…thanks for the ride…Jeno.”
Your hands reach over to the handle to push the door open but before the impact, he grips your wrist and pinned you down to your seat. Your eyes go wide when he is almost hovering on top of you, his eyes reading all your little changes in the expression.
“I can’t lose to Jaemin here.”
And with that, he crashes his lips onto yours. The afternoon kiss with the other one was a quick and soft but this one is rough but like he has the whole time of the universe for himself and slowly he is sucking your whole soul. You didn’t kiss back but you push him. Taking heavy breathes, you take a look yourself in the mirror but he grips your jaw and turns to face him. His other hand placing your hairs properly and then wipes the smudged lipstick stain from your face and rubbing it on his lips
“Now it’s perfect.”
He gives you his eye smile. Cute.
As soon as he turns around to open his door, you quickly got out of the car before he could speak up anything more.
The whole evening went with having a lot of delicious foods and having fun at karaoke and arcades. Well, you caught up on lots of funny rumors of your old classmates, many dating scandals and other spicy gossips. It was really great to catch up with your old friends. You were distracted from the thought of your brothers most of the time but everytime a scene comes across your mind, suddenly you would become quiet.
“Y/N, are you okay?”
“Of course.”
You all cant understand because it’s not like you are getting kissed by your brothers everyday. Also, by both of them on the same day.
And you just know, you have to keep all these as secrets from the parents because if they find out about it, you don’t know what would happen after and again you don’t want to ruin your mother’s happy life.
When it was already late at night, you texted your mother that you would be home soon and one of your friends might drop you off to your house and she agreed with it. Your father also texted you to be safe on your way. But two people were not happy with you being out for so long. You had numerous calls from your brothers but you just kept it in silent. It’s not like you haven’t received once. You had answered few of their calls and explained about your ride back home but they were stuck with one sentence.
“We will pick you up. Just tell us when we need to pick you up.”
But you dared to ignore their protest and still asked one of friends to drop you off at home.
Everyone waved off their goodbyes and it’s you and Jongho while going towards the parking area.
“it was really nice to see you after so many months.”
“Same here. I didn’t know that nerdy gummy bear is now a great man.”
“Well I am now and I can protect you as well.”
“Thank you.” You both giggled on his words.
“There wont be a need for you to protect her.”
Why? Cant atleast the night end peacefully? You both turned around to the voice and Jongho frown to see two unfamiliar faces glaring back at him.
“Who are you? Y/N, do you know them?”
“She is not likely to be answerable to your every question when we are here you know.”
And that sassy voice made his appearance out from the dark space of the parking lot. Hands folded in front and eyes sending daggers to your friend.
“Hello there mister. Myself Jaemin. A lot more handsome and sexy person than you.”
Before Jongho could protest anything, Jaemin grip your wrist and start dragging you towards the car where you could already see someone sitting in the driver’s space. He has not come alone. That means Jeno is also there. Turning your face, you send a reassuring smile that you are fine and you waved him goodbye and told him to have a safe ride back home. Unlike you.
“Jaemin, leave my hand. I can walk.”
He ignores your every word and proceeds to walk towards the car. He harshly opens the passenger seat door and pushes you inside. Without any complaint, you swiftly go inside and he shuts the door. He goes in the backseat when your focus falls on Jeno’s hand gripping the steering wheel tightly, knuckles turning white and veins popping attractively on his arms, he is not wearing the jacket from previously and shirt sleeves are folded.
“Why didn’t you pick up the calls?”
“I told you before that I could have gone back with Jongho.”
Jaemin interjects.
“so? Haven’t I told you before that I don’t trust your friends?”
“That’s your problem. I trust my friends.”
“You-“
Jeno darkly chuckles. “Jaemin, let it go. She doesn’t know that we know how to tame brats like her.”
“What?”
“Ah sure Jeno.”
That’s how you were bombarded with lot of questions during the ride back home about your whole day.
The following next week, you were doing your best to avoid being near to them. But they have the total opposite thing on their mind. Their motive was to follow you like the lost puppy the whole day. The worst thing was that they would make some worst excuses sometimes and not let you to leave for any kind of parties and meet ups. It was okay to go out for any day-out fun but not night. Surprisingly, your parents were also agreeing with them and appreciating the fact that how they were showing their concern for their only sister.
If only they knew, how they actually treat you.
With the passing of days, you can feel their eyes are more lingering on your body. Their intense pervert gaze to which you glare them back but one either blinks at you or the other smirks at you confidently. You were nothing less as you would also check them out whenever they are unaware of your presence and not to lie, you are getting attracted to them more with every passing time, you are getting more proper close up look of their bare face with raw and groggy voice each morning and sometimes when you come across with each other during midnight.
And then this day when suddenly, your parents have to leave for a vacation business trip for a couple of months and that means. THAT MEANS YOU WILL BE ALONE WITH YOUR BROTHERS THE WHOLE DAY. EVERY DAY. You begged your mother to take you with her but she waved you off telling how childish and stupid you sound like. You almost spilled out the actual reason but regained your composure to keep the secret.
So you made a plan to spend few days at your friends house and maybe you should plan out some more hangouts so you don’t have to face your brothers. And that’s how, you are making your way out of the house to meet your dearest friend but maybe that’s not how smooth your life is meant to be.
“Where do you think you are going?”
Only one more step and you would have been out of the house but not today. Gulping, you clutched the door handle tightly in your fist and turned around to face the owner of the voice. It’s not like the person is anyhow unfamiliar to you or someone you are scared of. Well, yeah the person who you want to avoid rather you should unless you want to be in a big trouble. Turning around on your heel, you kept your gaze on the floor, suddenly finding it the most beautiful and appreciable thing in your life. You could feel the approaching footsteps but not daring to look up because why will you when you are damn aware of the person before you. Your panic state didn’t go unnoticed by the approaching person. Now, you could smell the cologne of the man and the close proximity between you two was making your mind scream loudly inside. Two fingers brushing your cheeks sliding down to your chin and grabbed it, forcing you to look up. Due to the sudden impact, you closed your eyes, still could hear the chuckle left from his lips. Even when your eyes are closed, you could still feel the well built muscular body towering over you. Another hand brushed your hairs and tugged them behind your eyes. Your heart racing and mind screaming but you just wanted to run away from the current situation.
“Open your eyes baby.”
No. Please let me go out. You were mentally begging him to let you go but nothing was coming out of your throat and so you just gulped the lump. Not reacting to his words, he gripped your jaw tightly and you could feel his breath fanning over your lips. You tried to bend backwards but his other hand placed on your lower back pulled you closer towards him.
“Didn’t you hear what I said? Open your eyes. Let me see the pretty eyes of my baby.”
His voice was a lot more dominative than before and you didn’t want to make him mad so you slowly parted your eyelids. Eyes couldn’t focus on his face due to the fact that you were closing them so tightly previously and also this man being so close to you that lights couldn’t make up the image properly for your eyes. Flattering your eyelashes, you were then staring to those attractively seductive eyes as it could hipnotiza you. Anyone could have felt weak for these eyes and him in such situation including you but not when he being your brother. Well, correctly stepbrother. You were damn aware of the treatment that a step brother should have for his little sister but in your case, nothing was near to that fact check. You were literally living with two damn tease who constantly stir up every situation to flirting and teasing.
“Did you ask us before leaving?”
“I- I was just going to tell you.”
“Really? It doesn’t look like that. It was as if you were going somewhere else to avoid us tonight. Is there any reason?”
You were trying to voice out some words but the way his fingers were brushing over your lower lips. Oh gosh! It’s not helping your condition.
“Answer him.”
Okay! Time to leave now. The only thing I have to do is to push the man in front of me and quickly run out of the door before the other one can descend the stairs. Eyes dancing on their forms, mentally you counted to three and you pushed him. He got startled due to your sudden action but was quick to catch your hands.
“Step one more. You will regret it later so much.”
“Someone is being a stubborn today, you know.”
“Where was she going Jaemin?”
You could see him smirking on his brother’s question before replying to him, he winked at you with lips sending a flying kiss to you. The biggest tease in the household. You glared at him and when you looked at the other one, he was already glaring at you darkly with clenched jaw. But you were getting distracted how his biceps were well reflected under the bright lights because of his black sleeveless tee.
“I was asking her that before you made your entry on our private time. Jeno got no jam.”
“Shut up Jaemin. You are literally standing at the entrance in a massive hall and saying private time.”
“But there is no one around.”
“I am here. Well, getting back to her. It’s past curfew time and where is she going even all dolled up.”
Both of them expecting an answer from you, waiting for your reply but you chose to remain quiet. You tried to wiggle your hand out of his grip but he held it tighter and Jeno was satisfied with his brother’s act. You stared at the older one who had already seated himself comfortably on the sofa and staring back at you both, gesturing his brother to pull you towards him.
“I was just going somewhere.”
“Where?” Jeno asked with a lot more husky voice.
“T-to to meet someone.”
“Now?” Jaemin with a frown on his face turned towards you.
“Yeah….”
“Who?”
You looked towards Jeno before thinking twice as it would be safe to tell them or not but you chose death.
“My boyfriend.”
“Since when do you have one?”
“We are just going to meet today to get along with each other so he invited me to his house for a sleepover. He is my old friend.”
“And you thought without telling us, it would be fine for you to just sneak out of the house and have fun.”
“No Jeno look I-“
You didn’t notice when Jaemin went behind and wrapped his arms around you to hold you flushed to him. His nose snuggling into your wavy locks on your shoulder and neck.
Whispering ‘baby’ ‘pretty’ ‘princess’ in your ears, breathe tingling over. But the next thing he whispered made your eyes went wide.
“Tell him you can’t make it today.”
Jeno read your actions precisely and noticing how you pressed your legs together, his brother’s every little action was getting a reaction out from you. Honestly, he was enjoying the view more than he could describe but the moment your eyes went wide, the corner of his lips rose on knowing what was the possible reason behind that. Moreover, he found everything cute.
“Do it. Whatever he is telling you, work it.”
“No no I can’t.” Jaemin’s grip was strong and the way both of them hit the Gym, you were well aware that you couldn’t stand any chance in front of them.
“You can do this but you can’t go out.”
“Please.”
“Call him yourself or I’m going to do it. What do you want?”
Snatching your purse from the hand, he hurriedly rummages into it to find your phone. Found it, unlocking the phone, he went through all your contacts and text messages until he found out your precious friend. How come he knows my password?
Dialing the number, he kept the phone in front of you with speaker on. You could see your reflection with your stepbrother on that tiny screen. Suddenly the screen turned on, and someone spoke from the other side.
“Hello?”
“Hey! Jongho….”
Even when you were talking with your friend, you made a straight eye contact with those daring eyes of jeno in front of you holding your phone. Jaemin was still in his world, inhaling your body scent as if you were a drug that he was missing out all these days. Your voice cracked when you felt him leaving kisses over your exposed shoulder.
“When are you coming Y/N?”
Before you could reply, jeno mouthed you to say what they wanted to hear from you. He raised his eyebrows when you remained quiet.
“Sorry but I don’t think ......I can go today.”
“What happened? Is everything alright? Do I need to come over for help?”
“No no it’s just mild headache. You don’t have to worry much.”
Jeno came closer to you and tracing his fingers through your face before pressing them on your lips. You averted your eyes away.
Jaemin whispered in between biting your earlobe, “eyes on him baby.”
You somehow managed to do so until the third voice interrupted.
“Please take care and let me know if you need something.”
You replied with a low ‘hmm’ before he cut the line and tossing the phone on the sofa.
“Now leave me. Let me go.”
“Now where are you planning to go? Didn’t Jeno said earlier it’s already past curfew time?”
“Both of you have already ruined my night. Now Atleast let me go to my room. So, move!”
Both of them chuckled on your reply and you creased your eyebrows in confusion, wiggling under their hold and gaze. Finding your actions cute, they started laughing.
“Why are you laughing?”
“You said you can’t make it tonight so let us make that excuse valid. Right Jaemin?”
“Of course, Jeno.”
“What do you mean?”
“I can do this all night baby, Make a wish.” Jaemin licked and whispered in your ears, biting the earlobe before retreating his mouth.
Jeno leaned down to match your eye level.
“Let’s keep it a secret before you can unfold what’s coming in your way.”
“no. look. Jeno…Jaemin…I- I…”
“What?”
“baby…just follow us and you will love it for sure.”
You know whatever is going to happen is something that should not been like this but the way your body is already turned on is basically denying your thoughts to stop everything right on the spot. You followed them to their game room, that’s the only common room they share whenever they have game nights with their friends. You haven’t entered this room anytime before and exploring everything new today is really exciting you. Exploring their new self will be lot more exciting to you.
As soon as you and Jaemin entered the room, Jeno shut the door behind and that’s how you know, you have to block every other thoughts which screaming to you to back off but yet here you are challenging their offer. Well not offer but you want to see how far they can go. Are you so irresistible to them?
Jaemin took you to the middle of the room, throwing your purse away and cupping your face and neck with both of his hands and pulls you closer. Eyes scanning every detail of your face, admiring your beauty even when he sees you everyday but not like this when turned on and your body radiating heat on his bare palm. With few blinks of his eyes, he closes the distance between your lips. Well, that soft human is nowhere to be found but a hungry demon feasting on his last meal as the way his teeth sucking your lips. Teeth clashing with each other, hands gripping tightly on your neck leaving marks but you are not protesting against rather you accept the doing and kissing him back. You can feel a different set of handles fondling with your dress back zipper and within few seconds, the zip goes down, the dress still hanging on your body but hands snaking from behind around your waist.
You part your lips from Jaemin to take breath when jeno speak from behind you, face snuggling into your shoulders and collar bone, inhaling your scent.
“Can I?”
You don’t even know what he’s asking with the groan lacing with the question, yet you nod in compliance. Jaemin averts your attention towards him by turning your face in his hands, nose nudging against yours before he kisses you. His lips are soft and warm, and you’re genuinely enjoying  how excellent he is at kissing. You again got lost in him devouring you, hands around his neck as to bring him closer.
You’re not sure how long you’ve been kissing for, only until Jeno tugs on your hair and pulls you out of your trance. You whimper when you’re parted from Jaemin, who smirks at the noise, hands entangled with yours.
“Don’t be a jerk right now, Jaemin” Jeno growls, pulling your back to his front as he moves to your neck. You moan when his tongue licks a juicy stripe up your neck, hands roaming around your body, the heated body coming in contact with the cold air of the room making your whole body shiver under their warm touch. Jeno tugging your dress upwards, leaving your thighs bare and exposed to Jaemin whose eyes following every movement the dress is revealing more inch of your skin from underneath.
Jeno kisses you hungrily like a beast. Jaemin’s kiss was intense but this kiss is everything but soft. His grip on you and kiss, both are rough. He is holding you as if a slight loose in the grip will make you fade away and the same goes for the kiss. He doesn’t bite you rough but little gently, yet making you bleed slightly. Your whine and moans to his actions are like musics to his ears.
“Ah, you’re so fucking perfect,” Jeno hisses, fingers inching closer to your core. “Make you whimper under me all night and can listen to your moans all night.”
“I know we have all night and I can see her like this for the rest,” you hear Jaemin with his sassy voice. “But I want to have my donut with the jam in the middle.”
You were so distracted with Jeno attached to your neck and one hand playing with your clothed breasts that you didn’t notice his other hand slides your panty enough to get a proper access to your core and dips a finger inside which let out a loud moan from inside your throat. Both of them smirk in satisfaction.
Before he can slides a second finger in, Jaemin bent down to lace his mouth with your other left out breast. He pulls the dress down to free it from the cover and quickly takes the nipple between his teeth, sucking and pulling it softly but enough to make you whimper to the effect. You know you should not enjoy this whole thing but yet here you are feeling yourself floating in cloud 9.
“She feels good, her soft skin, her seductive scent is driving me crazy” Jeno speak in a low tone still audible to the whole room, lips trailing kisses all over your neck, shoulders and collarbone, biting in between, ripping soft screams and sobs out of you. “What do you think we should do, Jaemin ?”
“Everything,” he chuckles, tongue flicking over your nipple and other nipple being rolled around between the fingers of Jeno, tugging it slightly. “I want to have her in every way I have dreamed and thought every second whenever she walks around the house in tees without any bra.”
You fail to register his words as Jeno increase his pace inside you, fingers pumping in and out of your pussy along with the tortures going on to your nipples.
“Get her on the bed,” Jeno says. “I want her to see breaking down under me and let’s see how she will escape me like other days.”
Jaemin pulls you away from Jeno just to push you against the bed. You whine on losing contact in your heated mound. Your messed up body hits the well knitted soft bedsheet, surrounded by all the neon lights to create a gaming environment but today’s game is whole lot different from other days. It’s the game you have wanted to play with them. Always.
You feel a tap on your cheek and you glance up to see Jaemin sitting beside you, smiling with eyes filled with lust. His fingers brush your lips, “no matter how long I kiss you, I won’t get enough of you.”
You are distracted with the angel sitting beside you whose deeds are totally of a devil, your eyes following how he pecks your nose before attaching his mouth to your nipples and to the effect, you close your eyes tightly, feeling the moment intently.
You feel someone slide your panty down your legs but still keeping your heels on and dress fondled over your stomach. You feel harsh slap against your pussy and then when you look down to see Jeno eyeing your core hungrily and his look is enough to make you wet more, he eyes your arousal leaking out of you, groaning with the scene. Your attempt to close your legs got stuck when he holds tightly the thighs apart and darkly looks at you.
“Be a good girl for me, princess.”
You nod and grips the bedsheet and other hand in Jaemin’s hair , tugging them extracting groans of pain but him not stopping you from doing it.
“Shit!” Jeno curses when he licks a long stripe of your arousal and your back arches, pushing the chest to Jaemin’s mouth. He has that smug look on his face to have you like this and knows well how his brother is making you feel good. “you taste so heavenly, baby.”
Before you can register the words, Jeno again attaches his mouth to your heat and sucks it harshly, fingers digging into your skin leaving marks making it too obvious for others to know how you got those bruises. The abuse on your tits and mound is taking to your climax slowly. You can feel the coil tightening inside your stomach and Jaemin could feel it with your body movements
“My baby, you are mine,” Jaemin praising you continuously but the way he is constantly biting uour nipples and leaving marks all over the chest and throat is really contrasting his sweet voice. “Doing so good for us.”
‘How can that mouth do two opposite things together.”
You see white when Jeno wraps his mouth around your clit, sucking harshly at the nub. You hit the climax immediately as soon as he presses his palm above the stomach and Jaemin pulls your both the nipples. Jeno licks every last drop of your cum but didn’t intend to end the abuse.
“Stop it…jeno…”
Even when you cum, he didn’t stop but keep on licking the clit, overstimulating you and to which your back arches and the view is heavenly for Jaemin.
“Fuck, you’re so hot.”Jaemin hisses, admiring your chest going up and down with heavy breathings and pained expression due to overstimulation. While keeping his eyes on you, he slowly unbuckles his belt, pushing the pants and boxers down to expose his hard and thick cock. He smiles at your glazed eyes, pumping himself a few times and you know that this smile is hiding all the possible monstrous activities.
Jeno pushes two of his fingers and you nearly scream out his name with the feeling of his tongue still fucking you and in addition of his two fingers scissoring inside you.
Jaemin moves down his hand to your clit and starts to rub the bud. This is too much for you. His actions are going parallel with one hand rubbing the clit and other one rubbing the nipple in the same pace. The second orgasm with two of them abusing you came too fast and your whole body is covered with sweats and exhaustion but this is the only beginning.
Jaemin pushes Jeno aside while the latter laughed to see his brother’s impatience and well he would have been the same if it was otherwise.
“I want to taste you too but let me first fuck you and feel this tiny hole around my cock.”
“Are you going to wear a condom?” You ask in a weak tone.
Jaemin laughs. “We don’t need one, baby.”
“What?”
You both moan together when he pushes himself inside, stretching your cunt with his cock. You cry out at the brief feeling of pain before you feel Jeno placing his lips over yours. Jaemin’s deep voice is making you clench around his cock. Feeling it, he grabs your ass tightly, leaving red fingerprints.
“Doing so well for us, princess,” he murmurs against your mouth. “Such a pretty angel for me.”
“Not only yours but….but mine too.”
“Did I complain when you called her your baby so just shut up and fuck her.”
Pain shifts into pleasure as Jaemin presses his palm above your clit, fingers circling around the nub. You can feel his cock is driving up into your stomach and hitting it with the force of his thrusts. He continues to maintain his pace till he hits the desired spot to make you scream out his name.
“JAEMIN!”
“That’s it,” he chuckles, slapping your pussy and cock hitting into that spot over and over.
You feel Jeno’s breath ghosting over your ear. Jeno licking your ears and groaning while playing with your nipples letting the familiar neediness building inside you all over again and the coil might explode before reaching the climax. The licking sound into your ears and the wet sounds coming from the down where Jaemin hitting your g-spot is enough to make you feel like the most special and enchanted person to them. Well it’s not only your thought but you are like a dreamy angel to them while all spread out like this on the bed, everything exposed and on display only for them to devour on it.
You approach your third orgasm of the day when Jaemin hits the spot with a deep thrust , your body is overwhelmed as both of them giving all of their attention to you as you are like a goddess spread in front of them to whom they got access after so many attempts.Jaemin groans loudly when you clench around him, he soon reached his high and bends down to peck your lips still buried inside you. You nearly got pass out by the intensity of your orgasm and the feeling of him emptying his seeds inside of you. You’ve never had sex before with someone and your stepbrothers being your first is something so different to imagine. Jaemin feeling you up and without any protection is clouding your mind with different feelings but got interrupted by him.
“Shit,” Jaemin curses before smiling up at you and looking towards his brother . “Her pussy is so fucking good. I want to have her again.”
Your blissed out expression while whimpering his name and shaking uncontrollably under him when he was fucking you is still replaying in his mind. Your bouncing tits when he was pushing inside you with his faster pace and the pleasure filled face when you approached your high when he hit your sweet spot was enough for him.It is driving him crazy and not letting you go away from him and wanting to fuck you to the brim until you pass out like this.
“Let me have my turn now, Jaemin,” Jeno with annoyance in his voice reminds his brother, but he’s immediately shoved away by Jaemin.
“No please let me have one more round.”
“You had your fun. It’s my turn now. Move before I just lock you out of the room.”
“Fine,” Jaemin rolls his eyes before pulling himself out and getting off the bed to change the position with Jeno and you find Jeno again between your legs.
“I’ll take her ass later and you can’t deny it then.”
“Fine.”
“W-What?” You stammer. Later? What do they mean?
“Don’t worry, baby,” Jeno assures you. “It’ll feel good, you just have to trust us. You can be a good girl for us tonight right?”
“How can I trust?”
“Why?”
“I don’t know but my brothers fucking me already breaking the trust of us being siblings-“
“Shut up. We are not siblings. Only me and Jaemin are legal brothers and you are our step sister not our own blood. But ours. You are ours.”
“Yes Jeno is right. No one can take you away from us. Even if people point out us being step siblings, I will fucking cut their hands down.”
Jeno smirks, “maybe burn them alive.”
They leave you no room to protest as Jeno turns you around, face hitting the pillow and his strong grip pulling your ass up, aligning with the tip of his cock. When he freed himself from the boxers, you could feel the pain spread all over your body as you have never seen such big cock, it’s thicker than Jaemin’s and you don’t think it can fit inside you, letting aside in your ass where you never had slid a single finger and rest alone this cock.
“I-I don’t think I’m r-ready for this-“
“You are,” Jeno soothes. “Don’t worry.”
“No no please. I’m already tired and this is…I don’t think I can…stop it Jeno.”
You barely get a chance to stop him as Jaemin pinned your hand to your back which were trying to reach jeno to make him stop. Jaemin kisses your head to soothe you and ease the tensed body.
“Relax. Relax your muscles. You are perfectly made for us and by now we know what your body can take and upto how much.”
“Jaemin, first make her feel at ease or it will hurt her in a worst way.”
Jaemin hums softly in your ear. “You’re going to feel so good, my baby.”
You nod with eyes tight closed and Jaemin smiles while parting your head. Jeno spread and covered the hole with lube before sliding himself into you. As soon as Jeno entered to your back, you could feel a tear slide down your face when Jaemin wipes it off with a finger.
“You’re so fucking tight,”Jeno groans and his groggy voice letting out a moan from you. “Her ass is clenching around me and also sucking me in slowly..”
Your moans getting lost into the pillow and muffled noises could be heard when he is pounding inside you. Jaemin let go off tour hands when he feels you would no longer protest and the hands fell on both of your sides weakly. Jeno noticed it and a proud smile with a self satisfaction blooms inside him. They have totally wreck you under them inside their closed room. Your exhaustion visible on your face and seeing that Jeno increase his pace,
“Hang on for a little more, baby. I promise it’ll feel good.”
You gasp when Jeno’s cock hitting every inch of the hole and making your body squirm under him boosting his self esteem at your reactions. He gathers some of Jaemin’s cum leaking out of your entrance and rubs your clit.
“Such a pretty princess. You’re gonna feel good, baby, the way am loving to see tears straining and messing up with your make up ” he soothes you again and the way his pace is uneven you know he is near to his climax.
The stretch is so painful and tears continuously falling down your face at the feeling.
“So good, you’re doing so good.” Jeno praises.
Jaemin who’s presence was absent for a while spoke up.
“If I was not there to catch you while sneaking out of the house then you would have miss all these fun.”
Jeno’s hand sliding up and down your bare back to soothe your tensed muscles and also messaging the ass. With few thrusts, you both come undone.
Still buried deep inside, he leans down to leave feathery kisses on all over your back and praising in between. You feel someone removing your hairs from the face while patting your cheeks gently. You hum in response.
“Are you with us Y/N?”
“No more…please…I can’t.”
Jeno pulls himself out and Jaemin make you sit up and quickly changing your place from the bed on his lap. They rip away all the loosely hanging clothing from your body along with your heels.
“This one is last baby.”
“N-No,” you protest, body feeling completely exhausted. “I can’t. Please, I can’t.”
Jeno sits in front of you, cupping your face and pecking your forehead, nose and lips, “I told you to trust us. You will feel good and you are still being a good girl for us. It’ll be quick.”
While Jeno was distracting you, Jaemin’s lubed finger enters your hole to prepare and it’s still tight after being stretched out from Jeno. With a satisfied stretch, he signals Jeno to hold you down while he enters you and as soon as he slides himself inside, you scream out but Jeno shushes you with the kiss. This kiss is a gentle kiss unlike before and it is really distracting you from the pain which is slowly shifting into pleasure. Jaemin’s hand finds your pussy and dips a finger inside to collect your leaking cum. With few thrust when he has milked his fingers enough, he brings them to his lips to taste them and groans in pleasure.
“You were right Jeno. She is delicious.”
Not letting you to keep up with their conversation when Jeno slides himself to your entrance and you nearly sob due to them both filling you up at the same time. You have felt so full even when you have eaten food more than you can digest. This foreign feeling is not much painful but rather exciting you to know how does it feel when they start moving.
Them nodding to each other, starts moving. A burning sensation spread all over your body and slowly slowly shifting to tingling pleasures. Toes curling, fingers digging into the skin. Jaemin biting down your shoulders and Jeno nearly choking you with hands around your throat gently but not to make you uncomfortable.
They increase their pace with praises flowing like a waterfall from their lips to make you float at the top of this world. Your mouth hangs open and Jeno takes this chance to slide his thumb inside and press on your tongue. You invitingly suck his digit.
“Shit I can feel you, jeno.”
“Me too.” He reads your body and facial expressions before calling out to Jaemin, “I don’t think she will last enough. Do it fast.”
With some few more thrust, you come undone and rest yourself against the front of Jeno and Jaemin sliding his hands against your back. You whine due to overstimulation but soon they come and ride out their high.
Pulling out from you, you are totally exhausted and anytime, you would pass out. But still trying your best not to fall in slumber. Jaemin makes some space to lay you down properly in the middle of the bed and you hug his torso before he covers both of you with the blanket Jeno brings over to him.
Jaemin brushes away the hair from your face, gently turning your body so that all your tensed and constricted muscles feel at ease.
“My pretty baby,” he whispers and you smile in response. “Get some sleep. We will clean you and take care of everything.”
“What are we now?” You ask with hooded eyes and murmuring sound.
Jeno chuckles at you, finding your every action cute when you are sleepy. “Isn’t it obvious. You are ours now. You belong to us. only us. You can’t ignore us now.” He slides himself inside the blanket to your other side mimicking his brother’s pose. Both of their attention on the sleepy figure between them, admiring how you still manage to look the prettiest even in such a state of exhaustion.
“Keep it a secret from our parents.”
“We will see about that.”
“No but-“
“Shh,” Jaemin coos. “Get some rest.”
Will it be a secret forever? Can they really keep it a secret? What if everyone comes to know about you?
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Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @vvshere @anyamaris @yeoobin @icchyi @jwnghyuns @piratequeen-queenofgames @dinonuguaegi @oreharuuu @eriny123 @jaehunnyy @jaeminnanaaa17 @stolasisyourparent @bockhyun @b-a-nshee-blog @kundann
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serendipitous-seven · 3 months
Text
i can't wait to tell you, "i told ya'." | jungkook x f!reader
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summary: Jeon Jungkook is a successful realtor with a big house, a nice car, colorful dating life, and a spunky 7-year-old daughter to boot…he’s also your best friend who you used to be in love with. Of course, he was never made aware because you swear it’s all in the past…until it isn’t. But going on a cruise with Jungkook and his daughter whom you adore should be harmless. Absolutely nothing can go wrong…Right?
pairing: jeon jungkook x f!reader genre: fluff, angst, crack, idiots [i say that with luv for my characters] word count: 17.2k  tags/warnings: a child [Mai] is present throughout the entire story, implication of absent birth mother, serial dater JK, so much pining, pg language, conversation about sleeping around/risking pregnancy, legal-aged drinking & getting drunk, hurtful words/heated argument, isolation, blurb about reader struggling to eat, Mai experiences anxiety [I promise she is okay], plethora of cheesy occurrences, much fluff & angst all because sowoozoo-muster-JK wrecked me
series mlist
this is a repost from my old blog, moon-write.
Thank you to the realest one, @hyungieyoongi, for not only wanting to beta-read this insanity for me when I initially enlisted her for help, but also for hyping me up while doing it. Her editing gave this story clarity ;; 
disclaimer: the portrayal of Jungkook in this story is purely fictional & does not reflect who he is in real life nor do I claim to believe it does. lastly, this story is not a part of my dad!bts series, a serendipitous life - singledad!jungkook is in its own universe.
a/n: GUYS. this story was purely created because I was under the influence of sowoozoo/muster JK back in 2021. I am so beyond excited to bring this back and share this cracked out fic again, I truly hope you all enjoy it and just have fun reading it.
“Mai, don’t be so dramatic,” you take the little girl’s hands into yours, dusting off the chalk from her palms, “look-see, it comes off!”
She beams up at you with a know-it-all smile before taking yellow chalk from the bucket and continuing her doodle on the concrete. You watch her as she makes a big circle, stopping to make sure it’s just right before looking at you once more.
“Can you make the lines?” She inquires with big eyes, you run your hand through her long hair and happily oblige; Mai stands and watches you, pressing her hand onto your shoulder; “daddy will like it!”
You chuckle, nodding, “your dad will love it.”
She kneels, taking blue chalk this time to draw clouds, a mixture of pastel colors in the shape of her handprint now adorning the sleeve of your shirt.
Adding butterflies to the chalk creation per Mai’s request, you hear the back gate open, and following is the sound of Mai’s jovial squeals. Quick to abandon the chalk, she runs into the doting arms of her father, Jungkook. Uncaring to her chalky hands, Jungkook sweeps Mai into a hug with no intention of letting go.
“Kiss,” he mutters to her as you walk over, dusting your hands off on your jeans. Mai presses her smaller palms onto his cheeks, squishing them in the process of giving him a quick peck.
“Oops,” she giggles, noticing the chalk she’s left on his cheeks.
“We made you a drawing,” Mai soon forgets, wiggling to move Jungkook forward. He smiles at you, following his daughter’s direction to the drawing. Mai, her eyes an exact mirror of her father’s, watches him as he takes it all in. 
Jungkook marvels at his little girl’s work; “thank you, babe,” he says, kissing Mai’s cheek who nods with pride, bunny teeth sticking out. She looks over at you, singing your praises for bringing the bucket of chalk as a surprise.
“I told you I’d bring a surprise if you got A’s and B’s, right?” You smile, winking at Mai.
Jungkook thanks you before telling Mai to run inside and wash up for dinner. You follow him to the patio table and take a seat, noting the exhaustion of another long day falling over him. He runs his hand over his face, closing his eyes for a moment before remembering his best friend is still there.
You offer him a pitiful smile, drawing him to roll his eyes and laugh, “what?”
You shake your head, “nothing.”
He straightens his gaze but even then, a hint of his sweet smile remains noticeable, “it’s never nothing.”
“But it really is this time. Besides,” you laugh, “am I never not worried about you and Mai?”
He just nods.
“You’re doing a great job Jungkook,” you pat his tattooed arm, “you are the light of her life.”
Jungkook looks back at the chalk drawing Mai doodled on the concrete, giggling to himself. Caught in his stupor and the innocence of his daughter, he comes to, looking at you; “these last seven years would have gone a lot differently if we didn’t have you though.”
-Seven years ago-
“It’s okay,” you try to soothe a newborn Mai but her shrill cries drown out your voice. You burn a trail around the living room as you pace, stealing glances at Jungkook who’s sat at the edge of his sofa. With clumps of his hair gathered between fisted palms, he’s never looked so defeated.
“Let’s try feeding her again,” you stand in front of him, hand reaching for the bottle next to him. Too caught in the frantic cry of his baby, he doesn’t hear you.
“Jungkook,” your tone is stern and you nudge his foot with yours, “come on, you can’t give up now, get it together.” A moment of hurt sweeps over his eyes when he looks up at you, but keeping your feet on firm ground, you push away the guilt that rushes you. 
You clear your throat, “her bottle Jungkook, please.”
He does as you say, his eyes wide as he looks at his daughter for the first time since you arrived. You press the rubber tip to Mai’s lips, allowing a drop of the warm formula to touch her lips, “I promise you’ll love it, Mai.” You try to joke though there is a hint of begging in your tone. 
Her cry breaks for a moment as the milk drips onto her tongue; “there you go,” laughter coats the nervous tremble in your voice this time.
You allow a couple more drops to fall onto her tongue until Mai’s cries ease into small whimpers. Her breathing staggers as she takes to the bottle, “see?” You can’t help but giggle. Looking at Jungkook, his eyes brimming with tears of frustration, he watches in shock while Mai drinks from the bottle as small puffs of air escape her nose.
“Use the rag on my shoulder to wipe her face, will you?” You ask him and he does just so, dabbing at Mai’s red cheeks, ridding her of her tears.
“I tried everything the last hour to get her to stop,” he whispers. You can see the disappointment in his eyes though he continues to marvel at the innocence wrapped in your arms. You watch as your best friend takes Mai’s foot in his hand, thoughtfully squeezing her toes before he moves his hand back to her head, rubbing her barely-there hair as far back as he can.
“Here,” you gesture for Jungkook to take his daughter and he steps back in fright. You chuckle, “you have to get used to holding her Kook, I won’t be here all the time.”
“Why?” He looks at you with all sincerity.
You shake your head, “she’ll be safe with you.”
He places the rag over his shoulder this time and holds his arms out. Mai fusses during the exchange and Jungkook shushes her in a gentle prive as he holds her against his chest; “just hold the bottle upright - yeah,” you say as you help to adjust her in his arms. 
He cradles his large hand behind her head while her tiny body rests along his arm. He stands straight as a pin, fear taking up most of his expression as he looks down on his feeding daughter.
“Is this the first time you’re holding her?” You ask.
He gives you a look that can only mean yes, “my mom has been staying with us, she left right before you came,” he shakes his head, embarrassed to admit, “I was too scared.”
A soft laugh escapes you, “well, how’s it feel now?”
“Still scary,” he says seriously, “but I never want to put her down again.”
You stand back, watching him take all of her in. A month ago your best friend had his life made - living a bachelor lifestyle his friends envied, had a stellar career as the most sought realtor, owner of a newly built home. He was a free man who could do whatever, whenever.
That was until one drunken decision in the past came back nine months later in the form of a newborn baby.
Swaying back and forth with a slight strain in his movement, Jungkook watches Mai’s drooping lids; “can I do this?” He asks in a dream-like state leaving you to wonder if he really wanted an answer. That is until he moves his eyes to look at you. 
You shrug with a pitied smile, “you love her, right?”
He frowns for a second, nodding without hesitation.
“Then you can do it, Jungkook.”
“I’d offer for you to stay for dinner but you probably have another date with what’s-his-name,” Jungkook closes the sliding glass door behind you two, sweeping Mai into his arms. The three of you make your way into the kitchen where he sets his daughter on the counter, inspecting her hands to make sure she’s cleaned them properly.
He playfully sniffs them before kissing her palms.
“For the thousandth time, his name is Mark, and no actually,” you laugh watching the two tease each other back and forth, Jungkook’s attention split between the two of you, “I don’t think that’s happening anymore.”
He stands upright, covering Mai’s ears which only sends her into a fit to hear the adult talk, too grown for her age. She fights to move her dad’s hands but to no avail.
“Bad kisser? I knew it,” he shakes his head while moving Mai’s from side to side. Belly laughs erupt from her small body as she begs for her dad to stop.
“Shut up,” you laugh, rolling your eyes. He chuckles, removing his hands from Mai and kissing her forehead.
You sit at the end of the long dining table next to Mai, Jungkook at the head of the table as usual. He finishes reading Mai’s fortune before they look at you.
“Your turn!” Mai shouts, holding a single noodle between her trainer chopsticks.
The cookie crumbles between your fingers as you unroll the small strip of paper, clearing your throat; “an old love will come back to you.”
Jungkook dramatically ooh’s and Mai follows, her small lips shaped into a perfect circle. Victim to Mai’s purity you squeeze her nose, “who could that be?” You tease her.
“Not me,” she giggles, “maybe daddy, he’s old!”
You fall back into your chair, eyes brimming with tears as you hold onto your belly full of Chinese food, laughing at the expense of your best friend.
“Funny,” he tries not to laugh, stuffing the remains of his fortune cookie into his mouth.
Chirping crickets and a black sky surround Jungkook’s home. You listen to the sound echo up into the vaulted ceilings, looking out of the opened windows. Taken by the quiet that surrounds his place, you shut your eyes and bask in it until the sound of Jungkook’s feet shuffles down the hallway.
“I don’t know whose good side I am on,” he sighs with relief, grabbing his glass of wine on the way to the sofa, “but she falls asleep like that.” He snaps his fingers.
You smile, peeling your attention away from the window.
Now dressed in baggy clothes that swallow up his svelte build, Jungkook takes a generous sip from his glass before patting the space next to him, “so, what’s wrong with this guy?”
You stop on your way to the sofa, eyebrows raised with sarcasm, “let’s cut the attitude, yeah?”
He can’t help but laugh, moving his leg when you finally sit down, “joking,” he reassures you, “but I mean, this is the third guy you’ve rejected and I didn’t even get to meet him.”
You shrug, “like you really wanted to?” Quirking an eyebrow at him, Jungkook can’t seem to look at you, laughing into his wine glass; “who’s worse here? You’ve always had at least one thing to complain about every guy I’ve brought around.”
“The bean and I have a preliminary process when it comes to guys you date,” he shrugs, licking a stray drop of wine before it can drip onto his sweatpants.
“Yes because a seven year old has a lot to say about adults and dating,” you chuckle, pushing Jungkook’s shoulder, “anyway, you aren’t missing out on anything Kook - and besides, I don’t want to introduce people into your guys’ life until I’m sure about them this time.”
Jungkook’s playfulness dies off, the wine in his glass not as interesting as the sullen look forming on your face. He watches you, the way you bend forward, one side of your hair tucked behind your ear while you anxiously pick at your cuticles.
He nudges your knee with his so you can look at him, a reassuring smile awaiting you, “that last guy fooled us all, okay?���
You sigh as a way to say, ‘it’s forgotten…no big deal…whatever…’ but Jungkook knows it’s a stain you’ve struggled to rid of for a while; “he’s been out of my life for a long time and that’s all that matters,” you stiffen your upper lip.
“Mm, cheers to that,” he clicks his glass against your water bottle, “but seriously, can I ask you something?”
You brace yourself, nodding.
“Except for that trash bag, you always seem to find a flaw in every guy you date,” Jungkook stalls for a second, reading your temperament before continuing, “why?”
Your eyes crinkle, suddenly underneath a spotlight, “do I?”
Jungkook resorts to his scrunch-nosed laugh, “are you kidding?”
“Well, okay Mr. Dating-expert,” you cross one leg over the other taking on a new defense, “you don’t find enough flaws in the women lined up outside of your house every day - why?”
He nearly spat out his wine, setting the glass down with hands surrendered to the air, “false accusation, you know I don’t bring women back here because of Mai-”
“Okay okay, you’re right, I’m sorry,” you sit back.
He laughs, “but fair enough, I guess we both don’t have the best track record when it comes to dating.”
You stand up, pulling your bag over your shoulder, “I hate to agree since it concerns me too.”
Jungkook walks you to the front door, “I’m curious to find out who this ‘old love’ is,” you turn just as he wiggles his eyebrows at you. 
You force a smile with squinted eyes, “do you know me at all, Jeon? I don’t believe in fortunes, remember?”
He gives you a quick hug, watching you walk the path to your car; “I can’t wait to prove you wrong,” he says from the door.
You wave him off, “yeah-yeah save the love spiel for another time, goodnight!”
On your drive home, absent in mind, you rake your fingers through your hair. The bright glow of the red traffic light casts over you when you come to a full stop. ‘An old love will come back to you.’ You snort at the thought; they are simply typed words on a piece of paper. It means nothing.
“You don’t believe in stupid fortunes,’” you sing into the void of your car.
But it still makes your stomach queasy. Heart palpitating in your chest while your palm becomes sweaty as you ring it around the steering wheel.
“Let’s not go back there…”
“Hello? What do you mean no big deal?” Nic’s voice is a clear call into the late night, earning herself a stern look from you. “Whisper please,” you hiss through your teeth, “Mai never sleeps well when Jungkook is away, it was hell getting her down tonight.”
Nic looks at you with wily eyes, spinning every which way you turn before she gets dizzy; “oh my god, stop for sec!”
In a huff to clean up Mai’s after-dinner doodle session - crayons strewn across the table and several drawings she made as gifts for her dad’s return from a work trip, you look at your friend with exasperation painted on your face, “it’s literally what I mean Nic.”
She blinks in rapid-fire, sitting down on the ottoman while you work around the dining room. “So I’m crazy, okay yeah. Because telling me that you’re in love with your best friend of a million years is totally normal.”
You shudder at how easily those words come out of Nic’s mouth while Jungkook’s daughter sleeps in your bed. Too young to understand anyway, you can’t help but want to protect Mai from this very sensitive information about her dad.
Nic rolls her eyes, “oh relax, she’s asleep now. I’m spiraling over here, okay?”
“Just, come on,” you hit the side of your leg with the cleaning rag, desperate to get your point across, “discretion, please? This is not information I want to be tossed around.”
“How long have you felt this way?” She watches you in your haste, cleaning every speck left on the table in an attempt to avoid the conversation. You’re steeped in regret for even mentioning it to Nic. It was a confession locked in the depths of Pandora's box. 
It just came out.
“I don’t know,” you groan, disappearing into the kitchen before returning with washed hands and deadpan eyes.
Nic twists around the ottoman to face you when you come around, plopping yourself on the sofa.
“That’s a lie,” she states the obvious.
The popcorn texture of your ceiling suddenly becomes interesting when you toss your head back. I need to get my ceilings smoothed. You think to yourself while Nic waits. She won’t back down.
“I remember the exact moment I fell in love with him,” you sigh, tossing your hands up only to bring them back down on the cushions. You sit upright and look at Nic, “but it’s futile to even detail that because it’s never going to happen.”
“Do you want it to? I mean really want it to? Because he has a kid…”
Eyebrows knit together, you both have to laugh at that.
“I mean, you know, getting with Jungkook means taking on a child - although worthy to mention, a kid who absolutely adores you-”
“Please, don’t make me hurt more,” you press the pads of your fingers over your shut eyes, “I can’t even fathom how much it would confuse her - and I won’t entertain this past today. I can’t.”
“You’ve obviously been holding onto this for a long time-”
“And it ends today. Jungkook is my best friend, I vowed to be here for him and Mai as his friend, that’s it.”
“Okay, and when he finds a suitable woman and falls in love with her, then what?”
You can’t help the sadness that overwhelms your entire chest, eyes piercing through Nic, “ouch.”
“I’m sorry,” she takes on a new look of pity, leaning forward, “but that’s the reality, isn’t it? If you aren’t willing to-”
“Willing to what Nic? Confess to Jungkook and ruin our friendship? Ruin my relationship with Mai?” You retort, smiling because this is just too ridiculous to even consider.
“How can you assume he doesn’t feel the same?” Nic rebuttals.
You shake your head, “it’s not happening.”
That was 2 years ago. A night you remember all too clearly but push away along with the feelings steaming inside of you - chewed up and swallowed only to return from time to time like a bad case of acid reflux.
You scoff at the fortune bouncing around in your head, “not happening.”
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“What are we shopping for exactly?” Nic comes up next to you, raking through the neutral-toned tops with not much of a care about what she is seeing.
“Um,” you pick out two tank tops and hold them up against you waiting for her approval, “that cruise I’m going on next month - didn’t we talk about it?”
“Oh yeah, wait-who are you going with and why was I not invited?” She queries, noting the way you move swiftly toward the dressing rooms.
You chuckle, “I didn’t plan this trip, I was invited,” you shut the door to the changing room before Nic can follow you in. She leans against it, quirking an eyebrow, “cheeky,” she laughs, “who invited you?”
She listens to you mull over your choices, hearing your feet shuffle on the carpeted floor; “uh, Jungkook did.”
You are immediately met with silence, peeking at the bottom of the mirror where Nic’s feet reflect as she turns to face the door. “Come again? You failed to mention this romantic getaway would be with your best friend-” 
Opening the door, Nic nearly falls in when you catch her. You roll your eyes; “have you always been this dramatic?”
She shrugs, “one of us has to be-back to my question.”
“Not a romantic getaway, Mai is coming and-”
“Wh-like a family vacation-”
“Nic!” Your jaw sets and she shuts it quickly, “his parents are also going, okay?”
Your friend blinks in disbelief and you give her a look that wills away any sarcastic comment she has at the ready. 
You have to hand it to her, she’s a witty one; “besides it’s kind of a company cruise for him, all the employees are allowed to bring guests, okay?”
“Noted,” she purses her lips. 
The silence between purchasing your items and the walk to the car is thick with Nic’s wandering mind.
“Can you just answer one thing for me?” You’re already sighing before she can ask her question once at the car. Tossing your bags in the back before getting into the driver’s seat with Nic buckled up and raring to go; “have you worked through all of that - you know, your feelings?”
You nod, “for the most part.” Nic drops her forehead into her hands, kneading away at her temples and you have to laugh, “okay, yes I have, is that better Nicola?”
“If you weren’t such a bad liar, yeah it would be!” Nic tentatively shoves your shoulder, laughing with you, “how do you manage it because I sure as hell could not.”
You relax for a moment coming to a red light, “Mai is number one here, how she feels matters first-”
“That is very noble of you, but hello, you’re human and your feelings matter too,” Nic adds with pointed inflect, “and I can’t believe I’m saying this but Jungkook should know better, inviting you to family functions like the three of you are a family before he runs off with some random-”
“Nic,” you send a wavering look her way, “I don’t mind watching Mai when I have the time, I love her-she’s like-” you startle yourself, “I just love her, alright? I don’t mind it.”
Nic shakes her head when you turn away, your eyes set back on the road. An uneasy feeling settles inside of her, wondering how you’d managed to lie into believing all of that; “Look, you know I care about you. I know he does too I just think he’s a little blind and I’m just worried it’s hurting you-”
“I’m fine,” you practically sing.
“Okay, so you are now but it will hurt you eventually if you keep pretending like this,” Nic flattens her tone.
“I said I am fine,” you say with emphasis, “anyway, it’s Sunday which means dinner at their house-” you look at her knowing she has a smirk waiting for you. You both look at each other on instinct, eyes squinted at one another, “so I am inviting you to come with, okay?”
You both laugh; “yeah whatever, I’ll join your weird not-family-tradition for tonight.”
Sunday dinner with the Jeons proceeds as usual given the extra guest. Nic prides herself on where she can observe the oddities of your friendship with Jungkook and his daughter. Even she, sworn to never birth children herself, can’t help the fluttering of her ovaries as she watches the camaraderie built between you and Jungkook’s daughter. Mai teasingly stiffens her upper lip, shoving her face near yours while a goofy voice bellows out of her. You roll your eyes at her, laughing before attacking her sides with tickling fingers.
It’s a smile on Jungkook’s face that Nic hasn’t seen before. Spending many a night out with the two of you and friends, she’s used to the suave Jungkook she’s seen at clubs. The way he talks to women, motions for them, how he sticks his tongue out just enough for flirtatious emphasis when he’s curled up with one. His ego is seen clearly across the dance floor; Nic is sure her face is turning green at the very thought of it.
“Alright kiddo,” Jungkook stretches, “it’s late-”
“Dad,” Mai whines, clinging on to you. You hide your laugh, noting the way she tries to fight her sleepiness in front of him.
He shakes his head, “it’s a school night Mai- bathroom - brush your teeth, now.”
You can’t help but feel sorry for her, catching her pitiful stare that has so fittingly fallen on you, you chuckle, “come on, I’ll tuck you in afterward.”
With that little bit of incentive, Mai jumps off the couch, quick to slouch when she passes by her dad, meekly waving goodbye to Nic before she disappears down the hallway; “be right back,” you call to them, following Mai’s very sad trail into the darkness.
Nic sighs, eyes quick to find Jungkook, “so-” her smile flattens when he finally looks at her.
“So?” He adds, his eyes slit in wonder. Nic has always been the wild card with a fiery tongue.
She widens her grin, “I hear you and your family are going on a cruise.”
He just nods, smiling into his glass before taking a drink, “she’s coming too.”
“I mean that was implied-” Nic snorts, “that’s sweet.”
Jungkook chuckles, catching the sarcastic look in Nic’s eyes, “what are you on about?”
“Jeon Jungkook you are clue-”
“She was falling asleep while brushing her teeth,” you come out with a hushed laugh, “practically had to carry her into bed.”
Jungkook tears his eyes away from Nic, both friends staring at you before they force a laugh. You shrug it off, grabbing your things along with Nic’s who meets you at the door. Jungkook follows, his hands shoved inside of his pockets.
“Thanks for letting me tag along,” Nic exaggerates her tone, accepting Jungkook’s hug before getting into the car.
You turn back to him with eyebrows raised and he shrugs.
“Okay, well I’m going to be pretty busy with work the next few weeks, they want overtime - god-” 
Jungkook laughs while you struggle to get your arm in the sleeve of your jacket; “the sleeve is twisted-here,’ he says, pulling it out and holding it straight for you.
“Thanks.”
“I guess we’ll see you at the ship then,” he says, playfully pushing you toward your car.
You gently kick his ankle, “night, Jeon.”
He smiles at you, bending forward to wave at Nic who offers him a short smile; “text me when you get home.”
As always, you wave to him without a second look.
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“Did dad receive the confirmation for your parking spot,” Jungkook asks while swinging his keys around his pointer finger, leaving a house he just showed, “it has the information on where you’ll park your car at the port.” 
“He did and what about you, will you be doing the same?” Mrs. Jeon then asks about you, “how will she get there?”
He can’t help but giggle, his ever-curious mother always wondering about you, worrying that a small task may be a little too inconvenient for you, “you should pick her up really.”
Jungkook settles into his car, a playful eye roll following his mother’s assumptions, “already taken care of mom.”
“Good,” a sigh of relief can be heard on his end, “how is she anyway, we haven’t seen her since Mai’s little school performance.”
“Slow down, yeah?” Jungkook chuckles, “she’s busy too but good, I think anyway. She came over Sunday for dinner-”
“As usual,” Mrs. Jeon snickers to herself, “why don’t you bring her over here for dinner once in a while? I would like to see her too.”
“You really want that?” He arches an eyebrow.
Mrs. Jeon clicks her tongue, “yah, my son, you say that as if she hasn’t been an important part of my grandchild’s life. Of course, we want to see her but you say she’s always busy.”
“Oh,” he pouts, thinking it over, “well we have a whole week to catch up so you can make up for lost time then.”
“Mhm,” he could hear the smirk on his mom’s face, “she deserves a break Jungkook-ah, you know?”
Jungkook nods as if his mom could see him, “of course she does.”
“Between her work and then watching the baby, you keep her busy.”
Jungkook frowns, “yah mom, this is why Mai acts like a baby sometimes, she’s not a baby anymore, she’s turning eight-”
Mrs. Jeon clicks her tongue in protest again, “she’ll always be my grand-baby, and you - you’re forever my baby…”
He can’t help but smile this time, “yeah, I know. Anyway, you make it sound like I employ her or something, she comes in on her free time- whenever she pleases.”
“Ok ok,” his mother’s gentle laugh he can remember so clearly from childhood eases out of her, “I just worry she’ll think otherwise.”
“I’m sure she doesn’t mom,” Jungkook sighs.
“Anyway, that’s what dad and I will be there for, yeah? To spend time with Mai and give you two some free time to do whatever-”
“And some family time with all of us, but I appreciate it, I’m sure we can squeeze in a childless night.”
Mrs. Jeon chuckles before ending the call, but not before one more reminder about inviting you over to dinner sometime soon.
Jungkook laughs to himself as he pulls into his driveway. Like clockwork, Mai’s school bus arrives at the corner. He steps out and waves to the bus driver when they drive off before Mai comes running down the sidewalk and into his arms.
“Hey, dad!” She wraps her arms around his neck, kissing the cheek he purposefully puffed out for her.
“You’re getting big, bean,” he groans, faking a backache after setting her down. He rests his hand atop her head, hanging her backpack for her before they trail into the kitchen.
“Your muscles aren’t so strong anymore then,” Mai quips, tossing a quick shoulder shrug her dad’s way when he turns back from the refrigerator to glare at her.
“Smart-alec,” he mutters, tossing a small tangerine at her. She dodges it and sticks her tongue out at him, screeching when he makes a run for her. With several feet of height on his daughter, Jungkook snatches her in no time, throwing her over his shoulder, tattooed fingers tickling her sides.
Jovial screams and giggles leap out of the little girl until he tosses her on the sofa, her dark hair a wild mess and cheeks red, “not fair dad, you’re still bigger,” she pouts suddenly. Jungkook leans over the couch, laughing while swiping Mai’s hair out of her face, pinching her cheek in the process, “what do you want to eat for dinner, kid? Ordering in tonight.”
Mai jumps up in excitement, shouting your name.
He laughs, pulling his phone out to peruse a menu to order from, “not tonight- I have a work dinner, so you’ll be-”
“Not a babysitter-dad!” Mai whines, stomping her feet toward him, “I don’t want a babysitter, they aren’t fun.”
He shrugs, taking her chin in his hand and squeezing it, “sorry babe, she’s busy tonight.”
“Fine, whatever,” Mai turns in one swift motion and disappears into the den, homework in hand. 
Jungkook groans with a slight curl to his lip, “yah, whatever…” he says to himself, wondering when his 7-year-old became a teenager.
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With aching feet and a dull throbbing in your head, you sit at the breakfast nook in silence, swallowed up in the pleasant darkness of your apartment.
“Is it time to retire yet?” You want to cry like a baby, be coddled like one, rocked to sleep. 
Just then a ding from your phone pulls you from your minute misery; a text message.
[Mark]: Okay, I’m going to level with you, should I stop trying? This is the third time in the last two weeks you’ve canceled our date…
You purse your lips, re-reading Mark’s message while the conversation you had with Jungkook weeks ago looms in the back of your mind.
‘Always something wrong with every guy you date…’
You shake your head; that’s not true. Mark is a very sweet guy. He is kind of introverted in a big group but alone, he’s all about you. He treats you well and as much as Jungkook wants to tease you about it - Mark is not a bad kisser.
But…
You sigh as you tap away at the keyboard.
[You]: I’m sorry Mark…as you can see, I’m not great at being forthcoming…or communicating.
[Mark]: no, what??
Haha come on I’m an adult, I can handle rejection :’)
You smile, warmed by Mark’s playful attitude.
[You]: Is it worse if I say that you are a great friend? Because you really are.
[Mark]: Oo yeah, that hurts a little but you’re good, I’ll find some way to get over you..
[You]: Don’t make it worse >< seriously Mark, you’ve been good to me these last few months, it’s nothing personal.
[Mark]: you deserve it and I’m sure the guy knows it already
Your eyes widen.
[You]: Sorry.. what are you talking about?
[Mark]: Come on I’m not stupid either haha every time we were together and that kid called or her dad, you dropped everything to talk to them. Rubbing salt in my wound here, but didn’t you leave our date once to be with her?
Oh, that guy.
[You]: Right…He’s my best friend…and his daughter I mean yeah, I would do anything for her. So I can’t apologize for that, but this is even more proof that you are a great guy!
[Mark]: hahaha, ok I got it, I have to say this is the least demoralizing way any woman has rejected me before
[You]: You’re welcome? Haha. Good night (:
It couldn’t have gone any better, the guilt over Mark that settled in your stomach was now gone, but you couldn’t figure out why it didn’t make you feel better.
Mark is smart but he was wrong. Well…maybe answering Mai’s phone call that one night, while you and Mark were making out on his couch, was a bit excessive? You cringe at the thought…
Peeling yourself from those memories and the barstool proves easier when your incentive is to no longer question what everyone around you seems to have common knowledge of. Pouring water into a steel pot, you set it on the stove to boil for some ramen.
Not long after your meal is done your phone rings with the Jeons’ home number flashing across the screen; “Bean?” You answer, knowing it’s Mai since Jungkook only calls you from his cell phone.
You are greeted with an exasperated huff before she whispers harshly into the phone, “why didn’t you come watch me tonight?”
Choosing to eat straight from the pot because it was one of those days, you bring it into the living room, a grimace on your face, “my sincerest apologies kid. I told your dad I’d be busy with work since we’re all going on vacation soon.”
“Oh, well, I don’t like this babysitter, she treats me like a little kid,” you almost choke on your first bite of noodles, stifling a laugh at Mai’s dispense.
“Okay one - you are a kid and two - be nice, three - where is your dad?”
Mai scoffs with gusto into the phone, “work dinner,” she exasperates, “dad thinks I’m a dummy, I know he’s on a date.”
Your heart drops and with it goes your appetite, setting the half-eaten food down on your coffee table. You move the phone away for a moment, allowing yourself a second to let out a long breath before continuing, “how do you know that, you know your dad is a busy guy, he goes on plenty of work dinners.”
“Hm- again I’m smart, dad says he is going on company dinners when it’s actually with work people,” Mai’s tone is flippant, “but when it’s a date? He calls them ‘work dinners.’”
“Oh right,” you curse yourself for having this adult conversation with a child, “duh.”
Mai laughs, “dad has been going on a lot of work dinners-”
You clam your eyes shut, “y-you know what bean, I’m sorry but I’m exhausted- are you in any immediate danger that requires me to come over there?
“No,” Mai sighs with obvious disappointment, “I guess not.”
Even with the unsettling of your heart, Mai always manages to melt you to your core, “you sure?”
“Dad would be mad if I made you come here, I’m okay, I just miss you I guess,” her voice suddenly drops, and the little kid is back. The innocence you love so much about her pulls you in.
“I miss you too,” you say, “but hey- the cruise is coming up soon, okay? You’ll have your grandparents, your dad-”
“And you, duh,” she adds.
You shake your head, chuckling, “and me.”
After talking her through her irritation and simply missing the two people that are her entire world, Mai hangs up a little more satisfied.
You? You call it an early night, ignoring the dreaded feeling hanging from your heartstrings.
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You aren’t sure how to feel once you wake up on the first day of vacation. Having lost sleep over the last week while bitterly packing for the cruise, you thought up several ways you could have canceled before getting to this day. Picking up your phone on several occasions to text Jungkook only to picture Mai’s disappointment. She likely would have shed a tear or two at your expense.
Finally the night before, you swallowed back your pride and zipped up your packed suitcase which was now sitting in the back of Jungkook’s trunk with the rest of their things. He and Mai sang along to a song while you tapped your hand against your leg, unable to keep the smile away from your face for long.
Mrs. Jeon greets you eagerly after smothering Mai in kisses, taking the three of you ahead as you enter the ship.
“Home for the next week,” Jungkook comes up from behind and puts his arm around you, pressing his palm into Mai’s hair and messing with it while she tries to fight him off. You move away from him and walk towards the elevators, “shall we settle in our rooms?”
Mai is the first to react, running toward you and grabbing your hand in the process before the rest follow.
Once in the rooms with Jungkook’s parents only a few doors down from your suite, Mai pops in and out of the door connecting your room to theirs, “we can have sleepovers every night!” She cheers.
You shake your head, laughing at her excitement while still taking it all in yourself. Jungkook comes in from your balcony, pressing two fingers against Mai’s forehead when she goes throttling toward him, “relax monster,” he chuckles, “and not every night, okay?”
“Okay, but at least when you go on work dinners,” Mai peers passed Jungkook’s hip at you making a face too devilish for a child, “I can sleep in her room?”
You’re glad the bed is there to catch you when you sit back. Jungkook gently pushes her head back, laughing, “we’ll see.”
You have to swallow back that all too familiar sickness, “come on Kook, it’s vacation.” Mai leaps forward with a toothy smile, “yeah dad, vacation!” She shouts, wrapping her arms around Jungkook’s legs. 
You watch the two of them dance around your room, Mai standing on top of Jungkook’s feet while they tease each other; “duck feet,” Mai says, proceeding to quack at her father.
“Do you uh- you have to work while we’re here?” You ask Jungkook. He sticks his bottom lip out and shakes his head, “nope, just one brunch with a few colleagues but that’s it.”
You despise the relief that immediately washes over you.
Switching into vacation mode proves a lot easier than you anticipated, given the new information Mai shared with you during that one phone call. You hate to admit it to yourself, but seeing Jungkook stick around for the first couple of days provides relief for you that he is in fact, not going on any work dinners this trip.
Shut up shut up shut UP…
Your thoughts eat away at your brain while you sit poolside, taking a break from carrying Mai around on your shoulders like a mermaid - per her request. You were her throne and she, the mermaid princess of an undersea world, Jungkook the villainous merman out to seek her crown. After a victorious battle against said merman, you urge Mai to continue playing with her dad because being the throne is a weighty job.
Watching them is almost better.
Like a shooting star, a smile beams across your face, sitting back to hold yourself together, barking with laughter when Jungkook throws Mai into the air. A shriek of excitement falls out of her until she lands safely in a big splash.
Jungkook raptures you as you look over to find his head tossed back, perfect teeth showing as he laughs with every part of his being - eyes closed, the only visible part of his face is the utter joy he is feeling.
Your heart beats faster, cheeks grow hotter but not from the sun. Like the kind of gasp that escapes you during a jump scare in a horror movie, a memory locked so deep floods your head. You lower the brim of your hat to hide the immediate tears that flood your eyes, relieved to see Jungkook and Mai continue to chase each other around the pool, making waves while splashing one another.
It was a long day, Jungkook enlisted your help with a colicky baby Mai in need. You read up on as many articles as you could before heading over to their place, finding him in a panic though he was trying to repress it for the time being.
With much effort on both ends, Mai was finally asleep after hours of fussing. Jungkook, desperate for his daughter’s relief to the point of tears, you decided to leave them alone in his bedroom while you claimed a spot on the couch. 
Waking up hours later, the sun is long gone. You head to his bedroom to say goodbye.
The door is still open and you find Jungkook lying on his side with his back to you, instead of sleeping like you initially assumed, he is humming. One hand rests under his head while the other moves in an up-and-down motion. You stand on your tiptoes and see Mai is still asleep, laid out on her back with her limbs sticking out, you cover your mouth to stifle a chuckle.
She looks angelic - long eyelashes tickling the tops of her chubby cheeks, you can even hear her heavy breathing beyond Jungkook’s soft hum.
“Is it possible to be this in love?” His voice captures your ears but it’s a welcomed sound. You can’t see his face but you’re sure he’s near to tears for the second time that day. Pushing off of the wall, you walk to the edge of the bed. Jungkook’s eyes dart to you, dropping his head, silently laughing at himself.
You pat his ankle, a chummy smile covering your face only to tease him, “I’m heading home, will you two be okay?”
He looks back at Mai before nodding, “thank you,” he sighs before moving out of bed but you try to stop him, assuring him that you can make it to the door in one piece.
“When do I ever let you walk out alone?” He whispers, kissing Mai’s cheek before carefully moving off the bed. He follows you to the front door. When you turn to wish him and Mai a full night’s rest, he swallows you in a hug. You stand stiff for a moment, unable to recall if this was something that had ever occurred before. You weren’t the bear-hugging type of friend.
Even more, you can feel your heart thrum against Jungkook’s and suddenly it becomes natural as you melt into his hold. You wrap your arms around his middle to which he pulls you closer and tighter.
Eyes closed, the feeling of being in his arms is overwhelming and cheesy as it all feels, you have to will the tears away as a rush of feelings come flooding over you. Every over-thought you’d wondered up to this moment is answered.
‘Am I falling for him? No…wait.
Do I love my best friend?’
“We love you,” Jungkook says close to your ear, shaking you from your thoughts, but with them are the crackings of your heart, “I don’t say that enough,” he adds. He finally releases you and you have to pull yourself together in a second.
“Jungkook, I told you I’d be here for you and Mai- no question.” You manage to say, clearing your throat.
Walking away from his house that night, you know for you, it’s all changed.
A shrill cry of your name jolts you awake, cold water splashing your midriff. Your eyes focus back and on Mai who is now sitting on Jungkook’s shoulders, “let’s race,” she says. Without hesitance you jump in after them, pulling a giggling Mai into the pool with you who begs for mercy.
After a warm shower, sleep proves victor over the book Mai begged hands and knees for you to read, but by the time you washed up and changed into fresh pajamas, Mai’s face was planted into Jungkook’s pillow, hair splayed across the white pillowcase.
Jungkook hears you chuckle from his place on the balcony. Turning to look over his shoulder just as you kiss Mai’s head, a gentle flutter in his chest mimics the rocking of the ship.
“She’s going to need an entire week to recuperate after this trip,” you come out and sit on the bench with him, drawing your legs up and holding them to your chest. Jungkook’s silence makes you curious, but when you look over, the look on his face tells you why.
Brows are set straight with his arms crossed in front of his chest, you can see every thought that's running through his mind. Instead of pegging him with a question, you tap his leg with your foot. He takes a sharp breath in, laughing at himself when he looks at you.
“I was just thinking,” he groans, moving forward to rest his face in his hands. Your heart crawls out of your chest in search of a way to soothe your best friend, yet all the same, you just want to hold him.
“I was just thinking…” he sighs with a shrug, “back when I was twenty-one, convinced I was this big hotshot with a realtor’s license and brand new BMW,” he laughs in shame, “ah- then all of a sudden there’s a helpless baby who I had no time to prepare for.”
You remember that time with him; recalling the day Jungkook called you to his then apartment, voice too shaken to explain why he needed you there as he returned a missed call from the local hospital. Of course, your mind assumed he was diagnosed with some kind of illness. 
But with the call on speaker, you watched the color drain from his face as child protective services spoke to him on the other end. Words are thrown around like fireballs- ‘your name was put on the birth certificate by her birth mother Mr. Jeon…a DNA test has been ordered so we will need you to come down to the clinic to complete it. For now, the infant will be placed with our services upon release from the hospital.’
‘No,’ he was quick to respond, ‘no-don’t do that please, I’ll bring her home. Can-can I bring her home?’
“You didn’t need that test to prove what you already knew,” you add, watching the way your best friend runs his hands back and forth through his hair. 
He took the test anyway and it was of course confirmed that Mai was his; “when you called me over, I couldn’t imagine what they would say and that was definitely the farthest thing from my mind.”
“Wouldn’t change it for the world now that I know I’m a capable dad but-” his confidence drops and you sit forward, bending your head until you can see his face.
“But what?” You ask.
“Any chance at falling in love is out the window-” you can hear the guilt in his voice when he says that. He sits back and you follow, keeping your eyes on him. He chuckles with a crooked grin, “what?”
“Why do you do that? It doesn’t hurt you?”
He sighs, looking back at the water, “it’s easier, isn’t it? Sleeping around rather than risking a broken heart?”
“Jungkook, Mai’s mother-she was foolish for leaving you and even more for leaving Mai-I mean let’s not forget she, herself never even told you about your child in the first place-”
“Yeah but I’m still an idiot for even going there with her, I knew all she wanted was something casual and I gave it to her just so I could feel something.” He shakes his head.
“But one really good thing came out of that, right?” You push, taking your fingers and nudging his chin to force a smile on his face. 
He doesn’t argue, thinking of the little girl that is sound asleep inside.
A quiet hum settles inside of your chest drawing Jungkook to look at you. Your eyes set on the moonlight reflecting against the water; “I love your kid Jungkook.”
Just looking at your smile when you turn to face him, it’s a sight that nestles deep inside of his chest; “I already did before you even brought her home but I swear, my heart almost can’t take how much I love Mai.”
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The gentle rock of the boat begins to lull you into sleep; chilly ocean air creates goosebumps over your skin as you fight your eyes rolling back, your breathing slows as a content hum comes out of you. Jungkook watches you for a moment, noticing the slight chatter in your teeth that pulls a giggle from him, “come here.”
Your heavy eyelids open to look at him, blinking inquisitively as he brings you closer to him. “I’m trying to warm you up,” he chuckles with another tug of your hand. He scoots down to rest his head along the sofa so you can lay your head comfortably on his shoulder; Jungkook’s body heat is all you need to fully accept his invitation.
“Just so you know,” he clears his throat, “because I know how my kid is,” Jungkook’s voice sounds like a subtle purr, “she loves you too.”
Caught in a haze of exhaustion and more emotion than your heart can handle, you nuzzle against Jungkook’s shoulder, willing yourself to fall asleep with those sentiments in mind. 
On the cusp of a deep sleep, you swear you feel Jungkook press his lips to the top of your head as he carries you off into the room.
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When you wake up in the morning, you’re immediately aware this is not your bed though it isn’t entirely unfamiliar. Your heart launches in your throat as you sit up on your elbows, eyes pressed shut.
Okay now!
They pop open, your initial concern to find Jungkook lying there settles when you see Mai at your side. Her long raven hair strung across her face. 
A snore causes you to jump; awakened by his snore, Jungkook looks at you with one eye open, his body contorted to the size of the narrow cot meant for Mai. His feet dangling off the edge.
“You could have slept in my bed,” you snort.
He sits up, the sheet falling off to reveal his rippled chest and abs. You’ve seen his muscles several times, but the setting is far too intimate this time. You have to look away, pulling Mai’s hair off of her face. Jungkook stands and stretches, “it was nice falling asleep to you guys’ breathing- peaceful,” he says before disappearing into the bathroom.
The days go by too fast. Each one was filled with various activities tailored to Mai as she enjoyed the time with her grandparents. On several occasions, she couldn’t help but announce how happy she was to have her favorite people with her all at the same time.
Although, on the second to last night, you fail to ignore when Jungkook doesn’t return from that brunch as soon as he assured Mai he would, showing up early in the evening sans tie and a fresh mark on the side of his neck.
He comes lazily into your room after a shower, greeted by Mai with open arms, “where were you?” She asks, pressing her face into his side.
“I’m sorry.” His answer is short and hardly an answer. You turn away to hide your disappointment, closing the coloring book Mai was using and putting away her crayons; “your parents said you had unexpected business come up after brunch?” You ask.
He looks at you and nods.
Liar.
“But look bean,” he picks Mai up, conveniently placing her where she can’t point out the hickey, “you’re going to dinner alone with grandma and grandpa tonight, okay?” Mai throws her head back, “you’re abandoning me again?”
You can’t help but laugh, curiosity pushing away the heaviness in your chest, “wait, why?”
Jungkook looks at Mai, “cover your ears.”
“But-”
He curls an eyebrow at her and with a loud scoff, she does as he says.
“They want us to have a night out. We can go to the club downstairs - dancing and drinks?” He wiggles his eyebrows at you.
You shake your head, laughing while your resolve not to give in slips away, “I have a dress that deserves to be seen, might as well.”
While Jungkook spends the last few hours of daylight with Mai, you don’t waste any time and get ready. It isn’t often you can pamper yourself like this; hair laid sleek against your back, taking time on your makeup to ensure its lasting quality because you plan to dance away the troubles of your heart.
Just as you buckle the other strap to your heel, there’s a knock at the main door of your room. You peer into Jungkook and Mai’s room through the connecting door which has remained open the majority of the trip, remembering he left just a few minutes before to drop Mai off at his parents’ room.
You open it without much thought, stumbling back when you come face to face with your best friend. He catches you by the wrist, chuckling.
His hair is combed with an effortless side part, thick bangs swept on either side of his forehead. His patterned buttoned-down stands out though the short sleeves allow his tattoos to be on display. White slacks and a new pair of shoes adorn his lower half while a touch of gold jewelry ties it all together. Pushing your figurative tongue back into your mouth, you offer a simple compliment before stepping out.
Going unnoticed is the way Jungkook’s eyes slink over your figure, selfishly detailing in his memory how your dress fits you in all the right places.
“Hurry up slowpoke,” you call to him, already halfway down the hallway. He looks at you, wondering if you’ve caught him staring. You choose to turn away before he can see the smirk on your face.
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Music booms around you while a colorful group of people aged from 21 to 90 fills the space for a final night of hoorah as you settle at the bar. Your feet are already aching after Jungkook pulled you straight onto the dance floor when you initially arrived. Having clubbed with him on many occasions, you aren’t surprised by his rhythm and ease in gyrating his hips to the music. Perhaps a little closer to you than you are used to, but you’ll allow a pass tonight. And really, are you complaining?
No. But you choose to ignore that voice in your head.
Jungkook is looking around until he finds your eyes. You blink, clearing your throat, “I have a confession.” He scoots in closer so he can hear you better, eyes dropping to meet yours. Stirring in his seat, you wonder if he’s fidgeting out of discomfort.
Liquid courage pushes you to continue, “I broke into my minibar and had a little pre-game before you came,” you admit. Jungkook drops his head and laughs at you again. His eyes squint beneath a beaming smile, you practically choke at how beautiful he looks, “y-you might have to carry me back to my room later.” Your tongue suddenly feels numb as you stumble over your words.
He nods, “you deserve to let loose,” his expression takes on more sincerity, “you do so much for me and Mai.”
If not for the mood lighting flashing in various colors, you swear Jungkook’s face is flushed. His blinks are slow and you wonder when he’ll stop looking at you like that-
“Here you are.” The bartender barrages in with your drinks. You jump slightly while Jungkook thanks the man, a straight line forming his lips.
After two shots and another finished drink, Jungkook is ready to dance into the wee hours of the morning. Head caught in a constant loop after those shots, you insist he goes on his own. Just then a woman’s voice appears close to your ear, causing you to jump back. Jungkook looks to where you are with some sort of a smile appearing on his face but you can hardly make it out through a hazy gaze.
He’s saying your name and you make every effort to concentrate, “this is my colleague, Rosie.”
Rosie smiles at you but you notice more the way her hands are wrapped around Jungkook’s bicep and then the way she moves her hand to smooth across his shoulders, tucking her fingers beneath his collar.
Rosie from brunch. You smile, “nice to meet you.” You can’t help when your eyes ghost over the mark on Jungkook’s neck once more, the one you’ve had to pretend wasn’t there the entire night.
“Likewise,” she hardly spares you a second look before her eyes are glued to Jungkook’s, “let’s go dance.”
Jungkook sets his attention on you when you stand, making it a point to plant your feet firmly on the ground, “go, I need to use the restroom.”
Rosie wastes no time and pulls Jungkook away.
You groan, staring at yourself in the mirror, eyes weighed down with one too many drinks though you’re still able to stand on your own. That deserves a pat on the back along with your determination to not allow this night to go sour as you make your way out to the dance floor once more.
But it all comes to a screeching halt when you spot Rosie and Jungkook, even more, the way his lips hover dangerously close over the skin of her neck, his hand smoothing over her waist. Their bodies are pressed together as they dance with not an inch of breathing space to spare between the two.
You can’t help the fire that rages through you though tears sting your eyes. Before he can see, given he even looks up for one minute, you make a desperate escape towards the exit.
Stupid..so stupid. Stupid on a monumental level. What did you think was going to happen-he’d magically fall in love with you on this trip? Yes…NO.
You sniffle as you rub the heels of your feet, skin red from the pain inflicted by your choice of footwear. Even after a long shower, scrubbing the black makeup off your eyes that melted onto the bags that are now present - you can’t shake the aching in your chest.
“Ugh,” you groan, tossing yourself back onto your bed. Hair still sopping wet from your shower and dressed in your comfiest pajamas, nothing could soothe you at this point. Mind still swimming in a drunken state, you wish you could just black out already.
Click.
The door to Jungkook and Mai’s room closes. You shoot up into a sitting position once more, immediately regretting that. Jungkook peers in through that middle door, chuckling at you and a little less drunk than you. He always held his liquor better than you did.
That fire flickers in you once more, so slight but it causes you to twitch. You can’t un-notice it, even when you look away for a moment while he moves over to you. His hair is a mess, shirt hastily buttoned, and the collar is tinted pink, not to mention the faded lipstick marks around his jaw. He steps any closer to you and you could name the brand of perfume she was wearing.
“Club closed like two hours ago,” your words are still a bit slurred. Jungkook just chuckles, “yeah, I’m beat.” You shake your head while he moves back in the direction of his room.
“Old habits die hard,” you mutter venomously.
Jungkook cocks his head, taken aback, “what?”
You straighten your shoulders when he looks at you, “are you really going to risk putting yourself in this same situation again? Just for a one-night stand? Have you forgotten how Mai came into the picture?” The deep frown on your face is hardly enough to hide how you swallow back the gasp following your accusation. The dagger you’ve pierced him with digs into his back while a crushing pain swallows him whole, you can see the crumbling beneath your best friend’s eyes.
His cheeks grow red when he turns back towards the door, “go to sleep,” he mumbles in a tone that has the ground shaking, tossing his room key to the side, “you’re drunk.”
You flinch when he slams the door shut.
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The swaying of the boat doesn’t help the unsettling waves in your stomach and throbbing head. Even with the new presence of another person on the balcony, your head remains cradled in your hands.
“Here,” Jungkook says in a low tone but it still makes your head throb. He reaches out to you with a water bottle in hand, “and take these.”
You peer up, the torturous rays of the sun hurt your eyes. You shake your head. Jungkook smacks his tongue in disapproval, taking up the bottom space of the lounging chair you're sitting on. He opens the bottle for you and brings it up to your lips, “stubbornness won’t make you feel better, drink.”
“Oh god, please don’t say that word,” you retch, taking a sip. Another second later Jungkook pops the two aspirin into your mouth, assisting you with another swig of water.
The rushing waves settle around you but the awkward silence can be cut with the dagger Jungkook was still holding onto. He sighs, looking away from the wooden deck of the balcony.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so drunk before,” he says. The strained laughter that follows makes your chest grow hot along with the heaviness in his tone.
You feel his gaze fall over you and you finally look up at him, removing your sunglasses. He doesn’t tear his attention away from you, waiting to see if you’ll do anything, say anything.
“Do you remember-”
You’re nodding before he can finish his sentence, “I remember what I said.” You wish you didn’t, probably even more than Jungkook wishes he never heard it.
Jungkook sits there a little bit stunned, straightening his back and you can see the frown grow on his brow, “not that I owe you any explanation - I didn’t sleep with her, we just - I don’t know I just couldn’t-”
You question him with your eyes, “you’re right Jungkook, you don’t need to explain anything to me, we’re both adults.” You cut him off before it can hurt anymore, irritation lining your tone which Jungkook picks up on the latter. Somehow he still misses the longing behind your eyes.
“How about some leniency? I’m trying to be nice even though you insulted me last night-”
“You don’t have to be nice to me, I was out of line so let’s just drop it. I’m sorry for ever saying anything-”
“Will you let me care about you?” He snaps back. It catches you off guard, even when he’s been angry in the past, he’s never snapped at anybody. But the shock isn’t enough to stop you from feeling angry too.
“What are you talking-if this is you caring about me then please, spare me. I mean y-you came back to the room like nothing-” you groan out of frustration, swinging your legs over the lounge chair to stand up. The uneven weight nearly sends Jungkook to the ground but he manages to catch himself.
“Like nothing-what?” Jungkook follows you into your room.
“Nothing Jungkook, nothing happened, that’s what I mean. And you know what, nothing is ever going to happen,” you mutter, tossing clothes into your opened suitcase.
He grasps for the words falling from your mouth, managing to hear every last one, “what do you mean?”
You shake your head, “look let’s just give each other space, yeah? We only have today left so let me just do what you brought me here to do - let me do what I do best apparently.”
The riddled expression on his face only makes you grow more impatient for him to leave you alone; “that’s why I’m here right Jungkook - to take care of Mai while you rendezvous? I’m just a babysitter for Mai - that’s all I’ve ever been to you since she was born, right?”
His eyes grow cold while your words only chip away at him more and more, “you’re my best friend, I invited you to come because you’re like family-”
“Oh, just stop!” You twist pieces of your clothing between angry fists, “stop doing this to me-stop saying those things to me, stop cuddling with me like we’re-we-” you’re sputtering on the edge of stone-cold tears, “you just-you have no idea what you’re doing to me.”
“Then tell me,” he urges you, “for God’s sake talk to me instead of pushing me away-”
“Jungkook, I love you,” you cry desperately, your body sinking, “I-I love you, and I can’t do it anymore.” You collapse onto the edge of your bed, praying the tears will go away so you can get a coherent thought out, shaking your head.
“I can’t do this anymore, Jungkook.” You weep quietly.
All he can do is whisper your name to break the deafening silence.
“Just leave,” you look at him with red, tear-filled eyes, “please.”
“But we should talk-”
“I won’t do this anymore…I just can’t,” you can’t stop crying, “please leave.”
There isn’t anything more heart-breaking than when the door shuts behind your best friend, you are left alone to steep in the figurative mess left around you. A storm rages your mind while tear after tear continues to fall, even when you occupy yourself with stuffing everything into your suitcase. Some hours pass when you’re still in your room, suitcase packed. You can hear Mai enter their room, voice muffled behind the closed door she was so used to being open.
Follows is a stern call of her name from Jungkook just before the doorknob turns but abruptly stops along with your heart. You can hear her asking him why before you assume he pulls her away from the door.
You force your eyes shut, pressing your tear-stained face into your pillow and praying the last day on this god-awful ship will magically be over when you open your eyes again. Body exhausted from the emotional day, you feel yourself sink into darkness until all subconscious thought disappears.
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It was a fight to get Mai to understand why you weren’t going home with them the next morning. You never lied to her. Not once in all of these years. Not until today when you told her it had to do with work, that was why. She slumped into her grandma’s hug before going over to the car per Jungkook’s request who was standing near you.
“Jungkook, I just want to go home and I already called an Uber so-”
He just nods but you can see the hurt in his eyes, “will you text me-us? Text us when you get home?”
You look down at your phone, “I-um- I need to go over to the waiting area where I’ll be picked up, thanks for inviting me.” With that, you’re turning away before he can even breathe a second time. Jungkook can’t tear his eyes away from you, watching you walk away, wanting to watch you until you're a speck in the distance.
“Mai is buckled in Jungkook-ah.” His dad calls him away before he can do any of that.
His thoughts spiral on the drive back home.
‘I can’t do this anymore…I won’t do this.’ Your words play like a broken movie reel in his mind. A sick feeling settles in Jungkook’s stomach; a strong taste of bile rises in his throat as he wonders if you mean it.
The days following begin to fuse into the next before you realize two weeks have gone by. Two weeks of missed phone calls from Jungkook but even more painful are the missed calls from their house phone.
Mai.
You have to hold your stomach every time you think of Mai. The innocent one caught between two adults she thinks the world of, the only two who are her entire world. It’s enough to make you want to lose all contents of your stomach which hasn’t been much lately. Getting by on a couple of sips from your morning tea and a bite or two of unbuttered sourdough bread before heading off to work.
Everything has lost its taste, life as you know it has lost flavor.
You always enjoyed work, as stressful as it could be at times. But it was becoming your mute therapist because you couldn’t talk about the things warring your mind. They just bottled inside of you, one after the other; when would it finally implode?  
Three knocks sound at your front door and you jump away from the counter, a small plate with a sad sandwich placed on top of it. You abandon it, you’re sure the bread is starting to mold anyway. Poking your head around the corner, your eyes are wide as they stare down the narrow hallway. The runner in the center of the floor is left askew, shoes tossed under the hallway table cluttered with your keys and three days of mail; everything is left unopened.
The doorbell screeches like a hungry crow; you yelp a curse before clamping your hand over your mouth. There’s no way he has the gull to show up at your house…
A muffled call of your name sounds on the other side of the door followed by rapid presses of the doorbell.
It’s Nic.
You sigh, moving down the hallway as quickly as you can before tearing the door open. Nic stands there with her arm up, her hand fisted ready to knock on the door, “well, hello stranger!” Her voice is laced with sarcasm and a toothy smile to boot. She’s already setting her things down on the small breakfast nook that separates the kitchen from the living room, she follows your every move until you’re standing on the opposite side of the counter, a waiting expression sits on her face.
“Wine?” She asks. You’re impressed when she pulls a long bottle out of her purse, something like Mary Poppins would do if she wasn’t so cheerful.
You shake your head, pushing the bottle back into her bag, “I’m cutting myself off forever.”
“Ah,” she nods knowingly and it’s confirmation enough that she is aware of the revelation that occurred on the cruise. You know he called her and asked her to check on you.
You lean onto the counter and Nic does the same after propping herself up on a barstool, “he sent you,” you state rather than ask. You know your best friends through and through. And beneath your broken pride and splitting heart, you can admit that they know you just the same.
Instead of a joke, she just purses her lips and offers you an apologetic smile, “he did.”
You shrug, resting your hand under your chin. The two of you continue in a stare-off that holds a thousand words between your shaking eyes and Nic’s patient ones. She doesn’t press you like you’re used to, but perhaps that’s because she can see the sheen across your eyes or the way you keep swallowing back the lump in your throat.
Nic, opinionated in all her ways and always managing to impose them on the ones she holds near and dear, bites her bottom lip when you close your eyes only for a few tears to fall shortly after.
She clears her throat, pressing a tissue into your hand while your head hangs low; “you should talk to him, babe.”
You’re shaking your head and Nic sighs, biting back her words until you pick your head up to look at her. 
She’s careful but direct; “So that’s it, you just cut him off? For how long are you planning on doing that - for forever?” Nic knows how ridiculous that sounds. Even more than when you swore you would take your once secret love for Jungkook to the grave.
“That’s the plan,” you croak, pressing the tissue over your eyes so it can soak up your tears.
“And Mai?” Nic retorts.
Your hands drop onto the counter along with your stomach; there’s no answer for that.
“Custody isn’t necessarily a thing between friends-”
“Nic,” you give her a stern look and she apologizes.
“Look, you don’t need me to say this because I know you, and I know how much you love Mai,” Nic’s tone sounds desperate for you to hear her, “but I’m going to say it anyway - I get seeing him and talking to him sounds incredibly painful, but are you really willing to lose that little girl’s trust? I mean anyone can see that she worships the ground you walk on,” Nic can’t help but chuckle but her seriousness never fades, “if you decide never to talk to them again, that-” Nic pushes her pointer finger onto the countertop, “that will be excruciating for her…” The second to pause allows you to feel the final crushing of your heart before Nic finishes.
“You can’t make this choice for her and not be in her life all of a sudden just because you want to run away from reality - Mai is just as much in this painful reality with you and Jungkook.”
You hate how right she is. You hate that Nic has taken every single word out of your mouth and made sense of it.
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The sun is setting over the city as Jungkook continues to stare out the window of his office. It’s the end of a long workday. He’s tired after showing several houses from one end of the boulevard to the other. His feet hurt, his neck is aching, and he’s sick of wearing this stupid suit.
But he can’t think of anything else. He can’t think of anyone else. All he can think about is you. Sick with worry about his daughter who has no understanding of what’s happened. She’s asked to sleep with him every night for the past two weeks, it was the only thing that could soothe her anxiety. He wanted to be mad at you for cutting Mai off. Himself, he could understand, but Mai? Then again, he wondered how much he was to blame too. Did he unintentionally put his daughter in this spot? Going out with a different woman at least a few nights a week, asking you to babysit Mai every time? If he had just been honest from the beginning, maybe none of this would have happened.
He scoffs at himself, ripping his tie from around his neck and tossing it onto his desk. Of course, idiot, if you just confessed years ago, this wouldn’t be happening. Mai wouldn’t be experiencing her first heartbreak at seven years old. Selfishly, he wouldn’t have had to see the hurt that split you right down the middle when he waltzed in that night covered in another woman’s touch.
All the times you saw him that way.
Idiot. He has to laugh. Idiot doesn’t even begin to cover it.
“Hi baby,” Jungkook sweeps Mai into his arms when he finally arrives home, relieving the babysitter. Mai rests her head on his shoulder, pressing the moles she can see on his face with her finger. He’s not used to her being so quiet. 
It’s late; way past her bedtime.
“I couldn’t sleep,” Mai sighs into his shoulder.
“I know,” he rubs her back, walking into her bedroom. Maybe she could manage it tonight. Mai doesn’t fight it, climbing under her comforter when Jungkook pulls it back for her. He sits on the floor next to her bed, knees curled up to his chest, he looks back at Mai whose eyes glisten under the glow of the starry night light, “guess we need to talk, huh?” She asks.
Jungkook chuckles, pinching her cheek, “shoot.”
Mai’s eyelashes flutter when she looks away, “she always has dinner with us on Sundays,” she starts, “is she mad at me?”
Jungkook is quick to settle her disquieting thoughts, “never in a million years bud, she could never be upset with you.”
“Then why isn’t she coming over to see me?” Mai isn’t crying, but her eyes look back at Jungkook and he can feel a tear in his heart when she does.
He sighs, holding Mai’s hand inside of his; “I hurt her feelings, so I think seeing you makes it hard for her because I’m always with you, right?”
Mai nods, “So say you’re sorry dad.”
He muffles a laugh, “it’s not that easy for adults sometimes.”
“Why? Don’t you miss her too?”
“I do,” he admits, “and I care a lot about her too.” Jungkook says, eying Mai, searching for the right words before he continues, “do you know what that means, bean?” He rests his chin on top of his hand, stroking her hair away from her face with the other. Mai observes her dad, hands pressed underneath her cheek.
“Grandma says when you care about people, it means you love them, so-” she twitches her nose inquisitively and Jungkook can’t help but giggle, leaning in to pinch it, “ask me questions,” he says, helping her out.
Mai yawns, not too far from sleep. But Jungkook can’t resist this time before bed, when his daughter is on the precipice of sweet slumber and they are alone, talking about whatever. Most of the time they are teasing each other, but if Mai has spent the day with you, Jungkook especially wanted to hear about it.
“I guess, does it mean you love her like you love me?” Mai asks.
The corner of his lips quirk into a smile, “I love you more than you can ever know-” he stops to catch the twinkle in his daughter’s eye, “but this love is a little bit different.”
Mai nods and follows with a big yawn. Jungkook leans in once more to kiss her forehead, “sleep tight.”
“I won’t let the bedbugs bite,” May yawns again.
Before Jungkook steps out of her room, Mai squeaks, “dad?”
“Yeah?” He turns in a heartbeat.
“I love her too, and well you know how the other kids at school-well most kids have their moms you know?”
He can feel the final shattering inside of him when he goes to rub his chest. Jungkook moves in, sitting next to Mai when she sits up, “I feel like I love her how a kid is supposed to love their mom-like she is the very best friend I will ever get to have, dad,” Mai looks up at him, “if she is mad at you, please make it better because I think we need her for forever.”
Tears brim the outside of Jungkook’s eyes, his smile trembling when he stares down at his literal heart in the shape of his child; “I love you so much,” he pulls her into his lap where Mai finds solace hiding her face in his shoulder.
“But my friend at school can never know that, it would hurt her feelings,” Mai muffles against him. Jungkook manages a gentle laugh, pressing a long kiss to the top of Mai’s head, his tears going unnoticed by his daughter.
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The last time you received a call from Mai’s school was a year ago, she pushed a boy who tried to put a dead lizard on top of her head. He fell back and scraped his elbow. Mai was not about to let the school call her dad.
‘He won’t be as mad if you’re with me!’ She insisted, holding her hand in yours as the two of you crossed the street, a detention slip in her other hand.
Listed as the third emergency contact under her grandma, your stomach churns, wondering why they would be calling you. There is no question whether you would answer or not.
“Hello?” You breathe slowly into the phone.
The woman on the other end informs you she’s the principal; “Mai’s father and grandma haven’t returned our calls; the kids had an early release today but it appears they have forgotten to pick her up, and the buses have all gone.”
You frown, they never forget to pick Mai up from school. And if either one couldn’t, you were the next in line if she wasn’t going to take the bus; “oh-uh okay, I-um-I can be there in-” you look at the clock above your desk, ignoring the incomplete work before you, “I can be there in fifteen minutes.”
You rush around the room to gather your things, darting for the door with your keys in hand.
By the time you’re walking up to the school Mai is running through the main doors, the principal right behind her smiling as Mai meets you halfway. She clings around your waist and it instantly causes your eyes to water, “hi bean.”
“I missed you,” she says, pulling herself off of you only to grab your hand. She pulls you with fervor to your car, barely giving you time to look back and wave at the principal.
Once settled in the car you turn towards the backseat and look at her with raised brows, “did they know you were getting out early?”
Mai purses her lips, eyes widening when she shrugs in response, quick to open a book to read when you start the car.
“Hm,” you turn around without much afterthought, making the drive back to their house. It’s been three weeks now, three weeks since that morning which you’ve tried desperately to forget, and three weeks since talking to Jungkook and Mai.
You aren’t sure what classifies as tension between an adult and a child, but the Mai who is usually speaking faster than she can keep up with has taken to staring out the window, staring at the buildings whizzing by and trees blending into the other. You look into the rearview mirror every so often, pretending you don’t know why she looks so indifferent.
Hugging you was a good sign, but now she seems awkward, dashing out of your car and beating you to the front door. You eye each other when you make it there. She gives you a sarcastic look, looking at your keys for a moment before you get the hint. You always had a set of keys to their house. It felt weird using them now.
Mai pushes the door open impatiently, the keys still in the lock with your hand attached to it, “hey-geez, slow down will you-no running-” you smack your tongue, setting your things down when Mai runs down the hallway to her bedroom.
Your chest fills with air as you take a glance around their home, singing praises that Jungkook’s car is not in the driveway meaning he must have been too busy to eat lunch at home.
“Mai,” your voice echoes down the hallway, “Mai you know shouldn’t be running in the house.”
She’s sitting at the small table her grandpa made for her, her homework already laid out and a pencil in hand. You watch her for a moment, waiting for any sign of acknowledgment of what you’ve said. But she just sits there, chin resting in her hand while she reads over the assignment.
You sigh, moving to sit on the floor next to her, looking over her paper to read the words but all you can see is the blank expression on Mai’s face. You poke her hand, “anybody in there?”
She moves her hand into her lap and starts writing.
You know why she’s doing this and you can’t be upset, but it does sting a little. Usually, it’s a fight to get her to do her homework when you’re around; “so you’re just going to ignore me? I thought you missed me.”
It’s only then that her eyes dart to meet yours, her eyes a mirrored reflection of her father’s. It’s always amazed you how they twinkle like stardust is floating around in them. You attempt a smile but it just falls when you notice how her eyes are glistening with tears.
“I missed you too bean-”
“Na-uh, I’m a kid but you don’t need to lie to me, I’m a tough kid.” She defends herself.
“Mai,” you sigh.
“If you missed me then you would have come to see me, but you didn’t for three whole weeks, so you’re just a liar,” Mai abandons her pencil and drops her face onto the table, creating a barrier around her head with her arms.
That cuts you deep.
A liar.
You sit there and listen to her sniffle before working up the courage to touch her arm, she flinches and you wait for her to pull away but it’s more surprising when she doesn’t.
“Bean, will you look at me please?” Your tone is soft as you rub her arm. She shakes her head.
“Please," is all you can say. You watch her chest heave when she complies a minute later, cheeks wet from her tears, she can hardly keep her eyes on you. You reach over and wipe her face with the back of your hand, squeezing her chin in the process. She bites back a smile.
“You lost a tooth!” You gasp, holding onto her chin and moving it down to reveal the new gap in her bottom teeth. She can’t help but perk up at you noticing, “it fell out when I bit into an apple,” she giggles. You laugh with her, watching her round cheeks glow pink; “Mai, I really have missed you.”
She moves her lips in a thinking manner, finally, you can breathe a little bit easier when her eyes find you, “I told dad you are my best friend. And usually best friends like to see each other, so,” she hums, scrounging around for her thoughts, “so you didn’t come over and I thought you just didn’t want me to be your friend anymore.”
You’re shaking your head, cursing at yourself, “that would never happen, not in a million lifetimes kid because you’re my best friend too.”
She understands but you can still see the questioning in her expression as she tries to piece it all together so it can make sense. You pull Mai closer to you until she is sitting right in front of you, her legs tucked underneath herself; “I am so sorry bean, for not talking to you and for not coming around-” you start but you wonder how to continue, looking around the room as if there is some viable answer written on the walls, “I was…angry about something and it hurt me really bad. So I thought being alone would make me feel better.”
Mai plays with your hands, perhaps not even noticing she is doing it, “did it?”
You have to chuckle at her, if only you had a measure of Mai’s honesty, you and Jungkook would not be in this current situation, “no, because I just ended up hurting the one person who means so much to me, the only one who has never hurt me back.”
Mai looks at you hopefully, “me?”
A smile beams across your face and you pull Mai into you until she is giggling, “yes you, silly.”
After a moment of light-heartedness, Mai settles back down, drawing circles into the shag rug, “dad said he hurt your feelings, so I guess this is all his fault.”
You hum, rubbing your hand over her hair, “well - no, I can’t put all the blame-”
“MAI?” The desperate yell for her name causes both of you to jump. Mai clamors to her feet, darting into her bathroom and slamming the door shut.
“What-Mai?” You’re launched into a panic, one over the fact that Mai’s face drained of any color at the sound of her dad’s gruff voice and second, it’s Jungkook’s voice.
Her name falls off of his tongue like rapid fire. Before you can say anything he tears into Mai’s bedroom and comes to a screeching halt at the sight of you. He’s breathless, staring at you. All you can manage is to gesture at the bathroom door, “she ran in there.” Just then Mrs. Jeon comes in behind her son, worried eyes finding relief upon seeing you, “oh thank God, please tell me Mai is here,” she sighs.
You nod, confused as ever, “her principal called me because it was an early day and nobody was there to pick her up…” You stop, realizing there was a major miscommunication and Mai was the culprit.
Jungkook’s eyes are fierce, eyebrows in a straight line when he moves in front of the bathroom door, hand rattling the doorknob which is now locked. He makes a fist ready to pound on it when his mom stops him, “you’ll just make it worse,” she speaks calmly, looking back at you. Her hands are trembling when she reaches out to you, you move forward and grab them.
You fumble with words, “She must’ve-”
“We’ve been looking everywhere for the last hour - since when did my kid start scheming - open this door Mai!” Jungkook starts again, his worry fuming out of him.
“Jungkook-ah, please,” Mrs. Jeon pleaded, pushing herself between the door and her son, “the important part is that she is safe…why don’t you go to the kitchen, get some water and just relax for a moment.”
“Mom-”
She shakes her head, “I will talk to her, now go.”
Hesitantly he drags his feet and leaves the room. Your stomach does flips when Mrs. Jeon settles her attention on you, hand resting on the doorknob of Mai’s bathroom.
Please, don’t say it. Don’t say it. Don’t-
“Will you keep an eye on him, please? I don’t know why but he’s been so worked up lately-” Mrs. Jeon shrugs, unsure of what else to say. You take a deep breath in, nodding as you march out of the room at a snail’s pace.
He’s bent at the waist, face pressed into his palms before he runs them back through his hair- it’s shorter now. He takes a deep breath that is promptly cut off when he sees you standing there, your hands resting on top of the granite countertop. Your fingers twitch with anxiety, palms feeling clammy as your heartbeat picks up again.
He finishes a glass of water, turning around to set it down in the sink. He doesn’t look back at you, resting his hands at the edge of the counter, “thanks for being there,” his voice is barely audible, “you-uh, you don’t have to stay-”
“I’m sorry.”
His shoulders tense, another breath is trapped in his throat at the sound of your voice. It rasps and shakes at the threat of new tears but you hold them back for as long as you can. You aren’t sure how long that will last.
“Jungkook?” You aren’t confident saying his name, unsure if he is seething because of Mai or if it’s really because of you.
He nods before turning around, looking at the top of your head before his gaze shakes over your eyes until he gives up, looking down at the floor.
“I don’t know-” you stop when you hear Mrs. Jeon come down the hallway, she stands next to you and rubs your back, a more relaxed smile on her face.
“She failed to let us know that it was an early day, says she forgot,” Mrs. Jeon shrugs. You and Jungkook look at each other knowing full well that Mai is the mastermind behind this very moment; “but she understands the severity of what she caused and is ready to apologize to you,” his mom looks from her son to you, “and you.”
Jungkook thanks her and walks her to the front door after she hugs you; “oh,” she calls to you gently, “come over for dinner soon? It’s like pulling teeth to get this boy to bring you over, we miss you.”
You just nod, smiling at her before Jungkook closes the door behind her. He rubs the back of his neck, reclaiming his spot across from you. The island provides a safe space between the two of you as you lean your weight against it.
“I’m sorry,” his tone is unsure but you can feel the guilt radiate from him, “I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to say that,” he sighs, “and so many other things.” He mutters the last part but you manage to hear it.
“I was hurt,” you swallow so hard that even he can hear it, “I’ve had so much pent up - for years…I just lost it.”
“We always talk about everything. I mean, d-don’t you think I would have wanted to know about something that important?” His words are desperate to be heard, steeped in weeks of constant questioning.
“You make it sound like confessing is so easy,” you can’t help the frown that appears, “the risk involved? Because telling you just so I can be rejected doesn’t mean just losing you,” your voice struggles, “I’ll lose Mai too and god, I can’t stomach that.”
He’s looking at you now, directly at you, blinking away what you can only assume are tears.
“I-I didn’t want to risk that so I held it in, I pushed it away until I believed that I didn’t love you anymore but,” you shake your head, “I realized it wasn’t going to go away even after every date you came home from. How I’ve had to ignore the sick feeling in my stomach when you traipse in after you’ve been with another woman, a woman that could never be me - will never be me. I was so mad that I couldn’t be jealous enough or hurt enough by that to stop loving you. I want to stop, but I can’t figure out how-” your words taper off when you notice a trace of a smile spreads across his lips. 
“Are you sm-smiling?” Your hands tremble and you’re ready to storm out of there.
He is smiling, it’s barely there but you can see it. 
“Can I say something?” His eyebrows lift as he looks at you with hopeful eyes.
You aren’t sure if you should be offended by the crooked smile on his face, the same one that melts your insides and makes your palms sweat. You just nod, ready to take on another offense.
“I love you too.” His voice is shaking. 
Everything stops. Your heart launches into your throat and you aren’t sure if you’re breathing anymore. You can feel your mouth fall open, you have to tell yourself to close it. Jungkook just waits.
The confident, suave Jungkook you know all too well is replaced by the loving human you have known even more. The man who masks his worth with fleeting escapades that never last past one night or a weekend at most.  
“What? What do you mean,” you stutter, your lungs feel like they are collapsing, “why are you telling me this now?”
Jungkook closes his eyes for a second and shakes his head, “I’m scared too.” He says, opening his eyes to look at you. 
He takes you in, the intensity of his stare enough to make you fall back, you can only hope there’s enough strength left in your legs to hold yourself up. Your stomach flips when he makes a step forward to which you take one back.
“You didn’t give me a chance to say anything when it all happened,” his feet move toward you again in one small step, “I wanted to tell you then but rightfully so, you were so upset. Then you were telling me to leave-”
“I didn’t-I-”
“You didn’t want me to reject you?” Jungkook fills in the blanks for you. You nod sheepishly, wringing your hand around your wrist.
The air stills when Jungkook’s fingertips graze your hand, “have I ever rejected you since we’ve known each other?”
Your mind races. Intentionally, no he hasn’t. As much as you dropped everything to be with Mai, Jungkook would do the same. When your car broke down on the freeway late one night? Jungkook was there before the tow truck, a sleeping Mai in the back seat of their car. When you didn’t get the promotion you worked tirelessly to earn? He was at your apartment to pick up the pieces, later that night you and Mai baked cookies together and ended that awful day with a movie - the three of you cuddled up on your couch.
Jungkook has always been there.
“God, all I’ve ever wanted is you,” Jungkook can’t stop himself long enough to allow you to stay in your thoughts. He can practically see your heart thumping out of your chest, he can feel your warm breath stagger out of your mouth. It isn’t until he decides to reach up and touch your neck with a ghostly touch does your breathing still. His touch is so slight it leaves goosebumps all over your skin. You swallow the lump in your throat when his hand grazes your jaw before he cups it around the side of your face. His fingers rub the shell of your ear.
“Do you still want me?” He fills the gap between you with careful steps; you can see the longing in his eyes and you wonder for how long you’ve missed that. With the little space left, it’s almost too difficult to look up at him; “Jungkook I-”
His breath stops at the sound of your voice like he’s ready for the ultimate rejection. His beating heart prepares for more pain.
“Yes,” You’re breathless. You only catch a second of the smile spreading his cheeks before he pulls you in. Muscular arms wrapping tightly around you but he’s careful to leave breathing room. All too naturally, your face nuzzles in his shoulder, breathing in his scent as your arms fold around his waist.
His nose presses into your hair, cheek warm against your temple.
“Wait,” you push your hands against his chest to create space. He grabs your hands to keep you close, “are you serious?”
He chuckles, nodding, his warm breath casts over your face, putting you deeper under his spell.
“After all of that happened, I didn’t think I had a chance. I didn’t think it could even be a possibility before,” his eyes look uncertain now, “you know too much about me,” he runs his fingers back through your hair, “but you are everything to me…you’ve loved Mai without me even asking you to,” he sighs, his expressions always more serious than most but it’s the Jungkook you know. Innocent eyes staring down at you, “watching you with Mai these last seven years has been the highlight of my life, but it was torturous too-”
You press your face into his chest, chuckling while tears overcome you, “torturous?”
Jungkook picks your chin up and kisses your tears away; “you were always in arm's reach but I couldn’t bring myself to say anything, I just settled to silently love you.”
You shake your head, allowing Jungkook to wipe each tear away with his thumb.
“I was afraid it would confuse Mai. She’s my world too, you know?” You whisper.
“She’s too wise for her age,” he brushes his nose against yours, wearing the smile that exposes his bunny teeth, “trust me, she knows enough that we should be a family.” 
His eyes search for an answer in yours, you don’t have to ask for the question running through his mind when his gaze sweeps over your lips. The only thing that forces him to stop is when he chuckles low.
“What?” You smile, head floating in ecstasy, you think you could pass out.
“I guess that stupid fortune was true.”
You shake your head with a small smile. He fidgets, “I love you-” he manages to get out before your lips press against his. They are slightly chapped but so soft as they mold to yours. You can feel your skin growing hot when his tongue rubs against your bottom lip. It takes everything in you not to burst right then and there, fallen victim to his tender kiss.
“I love you,” you stop to say. His slight pout at the break in your kiss makes you chuckle.
Jungkook lets his chin rest against your shoulder when he pulls you in, the two of you staying that way for a little bit. If not for the quiet pad of Mai’s bare feet tapping down the hallway, he thinks he could have stayed that way with you all night.
His eyes brighten when he sees Mai stoke around the corner, saucer-sized eyes spying on the two of you.
“Come here bean,” Jungkook’s voice surprises you, and you pull away as Mai runs into the kitchen. Before you can say anything to her, she wraps her arms around your middle, nose pressed into your hip. She muffles something.
You sniffle, “I can’t understand you,” you giggle, grabbing her chin in a tender grip so she can look up at you. Her eyes are wet again, resting her chin against your stomach, “I said, I love you.” Mai whispers like her dad can’t hear her. Her cheeks grow red and she immediately shies away.
Jungkook rubs her back with a loving stroke when he hears your breath catch in your throat. You kneel and take Mai’s face in your hands, “I love you so much, bean.”
“Enough to stick around forever?” She laughs nervously, swallowing back a soft cry, “because it was horrible without you, dad doesn’t know how to build forts like you do.” Jungkook laughs, nudging Mai’s back with his knee.
There’s a gentle mending in your heart when she says that, you stroke her hair and laugh with glistening eyes, “I promise I’ll build forts with you until we’re both too big to fit in them, and even then kid, you can’t ever get rid of me.” You are struggling to hold back the ugliest of sobs.
Mai doesn’t answer, she only falls forward into your arms, nuzzling her face into your hair. Jungkook joins you, resting on his knees to wrap the two of you into his hold. 
You pull your face away enough so you can look at him. He kisses you before mouthing the words you’ve so yearned to hear him say; “I love you.”
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