be nice to me or ill cry (the weight of the future)

the world underneath your skin — toji fic

MINORS DON'T INTERACT // 18+ ONLY!

pairing: toji fushiguro x fem!reader (uses she/her pronouns)

tags: romance x ANGST x like a SHIT TON OF ANGST x AU (no sorcerer stuff in this au) x action

warnings: alcoholism x self harm (Y/N self harms, i do NOT mean this in any way implying that the reader (you) do this. and that if you have struggled/or are struggling with self harm, this is a major trigger warning. as someone who personally has struggled with self harm, i know how sensitive the topic is) x death (only characters' death from manga is toji's wife and megumi)

summary: After spending most of his life as an underground hitman for desperate means to support himself financially — Toji Fushiguro gets recruited to work as an assassin for the government due to his his mastered skills. Through his new occupation, Toji struggles with muscle pains and is recommended to see a massage therapist. Toji meets Y/N, who becomes Toji’s massage therapist, and the two realize they both have toxic addictions they hide from daylight; Toji’s alcoholism and Y/N’s self-harm. Along the way, Toji and Y/N can’t seem to stay away from each other despite the darkness that threatens to keep them apart. 

Table of Contents taglist: @sakinotfound ;

DO NOT REPOST/COPY MY WORKS ANYWHERE ELSE. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED ©gojosoath

a/n: please, please read the warnings for this story because it does have a lot of sensitive topics like I mentioned. i'm gonna see what the reaction is to this fic because im not so confident in it?? i just don't know if people will enjoy it, what can i say, i need validation. i'll post this on my ao3 too and comment on this post if you wanna be on my taglist! also i know there's not confirmation regarding toji's height, like some have even said the dude's 5'4?? i get 6 ft vibes from him cuz he's a dilf so we're gonna go with that. anyways, enjoy :)

Part 1: Those Few Silent Seconds Are Everything (wc: 5k)

Toji’s shoulder ached as he finished shooting the target which was assigned for him tonight. The target fell to the ground after being shot on the side of the head. He fell to the ground like a doll, making Toji’s mind stop for a moment and think to himself; did he shoot a human being? 

There was no time to think, only move, and Toji moved swiftly and quietly. He exited out through the window of the target’s house. Toji hopped from the windowsill to the thick tree that was nearby, his hands gripping the branch where he landed on the ground, rolling and coming to a stop with his feet digging into the grass. Toji then jogged up to the gate, climbed over it, and landed on his feet where his co-worker, Shiu, was still waiting for him in the car. Toji got into the car and without a word, Shiu drove off yet again another completed task. 

Toji immediately reached for the pack of cigarettes he had sitting in the pocket of his black blazer. He took them out, sticking a cigarette into his lips where it dangled as he searched for his lighter. 

Shiu reached over and held out a lighter for Toji, “Thanks,” Toji mumbled, the light of red and orange illuminating Toji’s lips. The light went off and was followed by gray smoke to enclose around Toji’s face as he exhaled out through his nose. 

“Was he difficult?” Shiu asked as his thumb messed with the dials, switching between radio stations. 

Toji cracked open the passenger window where he flicked the ashes of his cigarette out of it, “Nah,” He said, “he was oblivious as fuck.” 

“Want me to drop you off back at your place?” 

“Drop me off at the usual,” Toji says to Shiu. Another sharp pain stabs Toji’s shoulder, his hand going over it and massaging it to the best ability he could.

Shiu notices, “That shoulder is still hurting you?” 

Toji shrugs it off and inhales his cigarette, “It’s fine.” 

Shiu settles on a radio station that’s playing what sounds like a commercial pop song, “I still think you should see that massage therapist I told you about. Her hands feel like they’re healing you. She might be a witch or something…” His voice trails off. 

Toji rolls his eyes at the window as he stares up at the night sky, the moon becoming veiled with his smoke. The radio pop station filled in the silence for them and even though Toji wasn’t crazy over the songs playing, he was happy that he didn’t need to make many conversations with Shiu. Toji found himself relaxing when Shiu drove up to the bar which Toji came to after every mission. Toji opened the passenger door, flicked the cigarette to the floor, and stepped on it. 

Before Toji closed the door, he leaned down with his hands in his pockets, “Tell the boss the mission was a success. Everything went smoothly.” Shiu nodded his head and gave Toji a small wave. Toji closed the door and Shiu drove off. Toji walked across the street opposite the bar and to where the river was. Toji took out the gun he had used to kill the designated shooter and threw it into the river. Toji stood there for a moment and overlooked the city view that the bar had, the city lights reflecting in the river. Toji stretched with his fingers clasped over his head and sticking out his chest. He felt like for the first time that day he could breathe. 

Toji went into the bar, and took his spot in his usual chair; the one closest to the front door. When he sat down, the bartender wordlessly set down his usual drink which Toji would get. Toji slid cash across the table which the bartender took and slipped into his pocket. The bar had a couple of people, pretty empty for a Monday night. After a few hours passed and Toji had several empty glasses by him, his blazer was off, resting beside him on the empty chair. He had the sleeves of his black button-up rolled to his elbows. He rested his chin on top of his arm while with his other hand holding the already empty glass. His cheek was flushed red, green eyes shining underneath the dim lighting of the bar. At this point, everyone in the bar was gone. He was always the last one to leave. 

“I had a wife…” Toji slurs at the bartender as he wipes at glasses, organizing them on the shelf. “And a kid,” Toji hiccups, “I loved my wife and kid…both good people.”

The bartender set another glass at Toji, but this one was water with ice in it. Toji continued to stare at his empty glass, “I was s’stupid, I was…” He recalled, “miss them s’much.” 

The bartender listened in silence as Toji continued to ramble about his past. Under the dim lights, tears slipped down Toji’s cheeks, tasting them as they made it to the corners of his mouth. Toji was thankful that alcohol was there for him to give him something that felt close to a hug. 

┅

3 hours earlier

As Y/N was getting ready to close up their clinic, the phone rang on the front desk. Y/N picked it up and said her professional greeting. Over the phone, Shiu’s voice came through;

“Hey, Miss L/N, it’s Shiu.”

“Oh!” Y/N exclaimed, “You calling to set up an appointment?”

“Yes,” Shiu said, “but not for me, it’s for one of my friends.”

“Sure,” Y/N moved the mouse and the desktop screen flashed to life where they pulled up the calendar. “What’s going to work best for them? Mornings? Afternoons?” 

“How late are you open until again?”

“On Monday’s and Friday’s, I’m open the latest, until eight in the night,” You told him.

“Let’s do Friday at seven for this week, do you have any availability then?” 

You pulled up Friday on your screen, “Yes, I do! Are you sure it’s okay that it’s tomorrow? Is it too soon for them?” You inquired. 

“Oh no! Not at all!” Shiu beamed through the phone. 

“What’s the patient’s name?”

“Toji Fushiguro. He needs a full-body massage session, I work with him a lot. He’s got a lot of pain all over.”

You typed out his name in the slot, along with a brief note about Shiu’s description regarding the patient’s issues. Shiu also gave you Toji’s number and you confirmed with Shiu that you had Toji scheduled for this Friday. After the phone call, you went and locked the front door of your clinic and went back to the front desk where you made sure everything was in its place for you to get ready to leave. 

You turned off the lights, bag, and car keys in your hand and drove to your apartment. You were greeted with your cat when you first stepped into your place, kneeling to scratch behind Willow’s ears. You poured Willow's food into her bowl and then headed into your bathroom where you began to wash your face. After finishing, you turned on the water to your shower to let the water run before heading in. You took off your clothes and stood there, arms over the sink, getting lost in all the scars you’ve imprinted over your skin for many years. Every time you looked at your scars, you only wanted to create more. It never seemed to end, there were never enough scars. 

Your hands had a mind of their own, you watched as your hands opened up the drawer that held those precious razors of yours. You could already feel yourself floating up somewhere to the bathroom ceiling, watching your body move. You watched your body operate, your hands opening up the pouch and taking out something that glinted underneath the bathroom lights. You felt yourself come back to life when you felt that first burning of the sharp end cutting into your skin. You were hunched over the bathroom sink, breathing heavily from just one cut. Everything muffled around you, all the pain, the worries, the memories just…gone. This feeling always only lasts for a few seconds, but those few seconds were everything to you. Those few seconds of complete silence were what kept you alive. 

After showering and brushing your teeth, you got into bed where Willow was already sitting next to the spot of your bed that was too big for you. You got settled underneath the covers and cuddled next to Willow where you confessed to her in a whisper;

“Sorry, Willow…I relapsed.” 

┅

Toji woke up on his kitchen floor, his cheek pressed against the cold tiles. When he first opened up his eyes, he thought the world was upside down. There’s something in one of his hands, it’s tangled up with his fingers. His entire body aches; head pounding, shoulder hurt, and back sore. He had to mentally prepare himself to do something as simple as sitting himself up. A moan got trapped in his throat as he used the strength in his arms to sit himself up. Now the world was spinning over, stars dancing in front of his vision mockingly. He finally managed to sit up, having to lean his weight onto the cabinet underneath his sink. He looked down at his hands and saw what was tainting his grasp; his keys. 

Suddenly, Toji’s body was injected with adrenaline, standing up in a heartbeat, and running to the door. His hand went to the doorknob and when he saw the door was locked, he heaved out a sigh of relief. He slid down the door, sitting down with a thump and head dropping down. So he had managed to somehow lock the door after stumbling back to his place after getting embarrassingly drunk. Not even alcohol could numb out his paranormal habits. 

From where Toji sat, he had a full view of the city across the room; his living room was adorned with ceiling to flooring windows. The sky was drooping with gray clouds, it looked like it would rain. Toji — being the big man he was, crawling across the floor, he had a bigger headache than when he first woke up. He crawled to where he had thrown his blazer by his couch. Once he got there, he searched his pockets, pulling out his pack of cigarettes and then his phone. 

Today was his day off, and Toji knew the way he would spend it. It was a Friday and Toji wanted to get drunk…again. He stuck a cigarette into the corner of his lips and unlocked his phone, seeing he had several text messages from Shiu;

Shiu: Hey! I scheduled you for an appointment with that great massage therapist I was telling you about! It’s on Friday at 7 PM! I’ll send you the link to the clinic address! 

Shiu: And no, you can’t cancel the appointment. You owe me one. 

Toji clenched his jaw, his hand gripping his phone until he felt his vision go blurry. The cigarette fell from his lips and into his lap. He didn’t want to go to some stupid massage therapist where they’d probably only make him feel worse. He didn’t want to waste one of his days off going to some stupid clinic that would probably overcharge him for some stupid, hipster healing shit. Toji almost felt like he would cry, a lump forming in his throat. He brought his knees up to his chest, dropping the phone to the floor and the heel of his hands digging into his eyes. He wanted to get drunk some more, he wanted to get drunk until any memories of his life he had experienced up until this point got completely erased from his brain. He wanted to get drunk until he didn’t recognize himself or until he would one night, stumble across the street and be hit by a car. He didn’t want to remember his wife or son anymore. He didn’t want to remember all the people he had killed in exchange for a paycheck. He didn’t want to remember that he was living every day he woke up. He didn’t want to remember… 

┅

Toji completely sobered up by the time it was in the afternoon, sitting on his couch across from his flat screen television that was hung up on the wall. He sat at the edge of the couch, legs spread with a bowl of cereal in his hands. The television was airing news about how the political leader he had shot last night was found dead early this morning. He couldn’t stand anymore hearing about it, so he switched the channel where a re-run of a spy-action movie was playing. 

If Toji wasn’t so pissed off at the moment, he would laugh at the lousy punch one of the guys threw at the protagonist. Toji munched on his cereal, thinking about how if someone told him he’d live in a luxurious apartment the way he does, he would never believe them. Thanks to his unusual occupation, he was given a salary he desperately wished for in his youth. 

Toji spent the rest of his day trying to keep himself occupied; he vacuumed, washed the dishes that had been sitting in his sink for a few days, and dusted his shelves. He even went through his products in the bathroom and threw out ones that he hadn’t used for a long time or simply didn’t want anymore. Toji took a nap, woke up, and made himself some dinner. Toji showered, and he shaved his stubble. By the time he got out of the shower, he saw that he needed to head out soon to get to this damned appointment. He wore a plain, long black-sleeved shirt along with black jeans and boots. 

As Toji heads out of his apartment, he makes sure to draw the curtains over his living room windows. He heads out, wanting to get this appointment over with as fast as possible so he can get to his night off. 

┅

You’re setting up the bed for your next patient that should be arriving anytime soon. You make sure that everything is prepared correctly; the air diffuser, oils, and extra sheets. You step out of the single room and to the small entrance area that has two chairs with a small coffee table between them. There are magazines stacked on the coffee table. You go behind your desk and clean up the papers spread across the desk. You kneel to sort out the papers underneath your desk. 

The bell above the clinic door rings as Toji steps inside. He is greeted with an empty desk and the air smelling like lavender. The aroma is a new sense for him; he’s so used to being around sharp smells like alcohol, tobacco, and…blood. It made Toji’s skin almost form goosebumps from being surrounded by such a tranquil atmosphere? Suddenly, you appeared from underneath the desk, making Toji slightly jump. You had been there all along? 

“Oh!” You exclaimed, “I didn’t even hear you! I’m so sorry — Toji Fushiguro, right?” 

Toji took in your appearance, he eyed you which came off that he was checking you out but this was simply a habit of Toji (thanks to his whole life consisting of his profession). You felt yourself getting uncomfortable by his intense stare. If intimidation had a body form, it would look exactly like him. You noticed immediately the tension in his body just from his posture alone. The black long sleeve shirt he wore hugged his muscles, you could already tell which places in his body needed to be massaged through the tightness. Shiu had mentioned to you about his friend that he was a bit…frigid. He was on the older side, you guessed possibly late thirties, early forties? He had black raven hair that fell over his face, flopping over his ears. 

You grabbed the clipboard with the paperwork along with a pen, “Here, you can sit down,” You gestured with your hand towards the room where the patient was taken for their session. 

Toji gave you a curt nod and followed your greeting by walking into the room. His hands were in his front pockets. When he passed by you, that’s when you noticed it; he had a scar. A scar that ran at the corner of his lips and over it. You felt goosebumps rise on your skin…was this guy safe? He kind of scared the shit out of you. You made a mental note that you’d leave the door open…just in case. 

Toji didn’t sit down, he awkwardly stood by the door that you almost ran into him when you stepped inside. You were quick to dodge it by stepping to the side. He was tall, really tall. You scanned him yourself with your eyes and made a guess; six feet. 

“Okay,” You handed him the clipboard with the paperwork and he grabbed it, giving it a speculating look. “I just need you to take a couple of minutes to fill out the paperwork. It’s just basic information, some background about your health, daily routines, habits.” 

It was then when you realized Toji hadn’t said a single word to you, there was a moment of awkward silence. You had patients in the past who were socially awkward but this guy just seemed straight up like he didn’t want to be here. He looked at you and you flashed him a smile, handing him the pen in your hands. 

“Let me know if you have any questions,” You tell him, “I’ll check back in on you in five minutes,” you’re already moving towards the lobby and you close the door on your way out. When you’re finally out of his presence, you let out a sigh of relief. 

What a weirdo…an intimidating weirdo, you think to yourself. You go over to the front desk and begin going through some emails you still need to respond to. After a couple of minutes, there’s knocking coming from the patient room. The door opens a second later and Toji stands there, clipboard in one hand.

He finally speaks to you for the first time, “All done,” He simply states. 

You go over to him, taking the clipboard from his hands, “Thank you,” You quickly scan the paperwork, walking over to your chair and Toji continues to stand there. You take a seat in your chair and say, “You can sit down, Mr. Fushiguro.” 

Toji listens and takes a seat, you observe the way he moves, even the way he sits. Everything about him is so…stiff. You can see why Shiu made an appointment for him. You begin going through what he had checked off in the form you gave to every new patient. 

“Okay…” Your voice trailed off, gathering your thoughts as you processed his feedback, “what is your main concern, Mr. Fushiguro?” 

Toji reaches up with his hand and sets it on his shoulder, “I’ve had pain here for a couple of months now. No matter what I seem to do…it’s always sore.” 

“Do you have a job where you are lifting a lot of heavy weight?”

“No, I work an office desk job,” He tells you.

You nod your head and scribble a quick note of that on his paper form, “Have you had any recent injuries?” 

Toji says, “No.” 

“Okay,” You set down the clipboard on the table next to you and stand up, “I’ll step out of the room so that you can take off your top and lay on the table.” You pick up one of the sheets that are folded on the table, holding it up, “You can set this over yourself,” You step out of the room and while you give him some time to take his top off, you go ahead and turn on your electric kettle to make yourself some tea. Once the water boiled, you poured yourself a cup and let it sit to cool down on the front desk — there wouldn’t be any more patients coming in for the day. 

Before you entered back into the patient room, you gave a few knocks, “Can I come in?” You heard Toji say it was good to come in and you did so. Once you walked in, Toji was laying down on the table face down, you noticed he hadn’t even bothered with the white sheet; his bare back was completely exposed to you. 

You stopped dead in your tracks when you noticed it; all the scars running down his back, his arms. They looked like old scars, deep scars, caused by sharp objects. Your hands started to shake, could it be…that he also…? Like you? 

You inhaled shakily and snapped out of it, making your way next to Toji. Your eyes scanned over his tanned back, it was adorned with scars. You brought your hands to the shoulder he had mentioned gave him pain. Your touch was delicate, your fingertips brushing against his shoulder pad, making him slightly flinch.

“Sorry, did that hurt?” You asked with alarm, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to — “

“No, it didn’t hurt,” Toji grumbled, “I’m fine.” 

“Let me know if anytime you’re uncomfortable,” You assure him, placing your hands back onto his shoulder, wanting to get a feel for it at first. His shoulder felt tight and strained against your touch, you applied slight pressure, “Is it mainly here?” 

“Yes,” Toji strained. 

You released the pressure, “Okay, I’m going to begin, are you okay with some oils?” 

“Sure,” Toji says. 

You lathered some oil onto your palms and began your work; you massaged upward with your palm while the other slightly squeezed at the muscles around his neck. You couldn’t stand the awkward silence for some reason, so you decided to do small talk;

“So, how long have you been working at your office job?” You could tell that his body was reacting by stiffening itself as your hands worked on his skin. You wanted to tell him to relax, to calm his senses. 

“Ten years,” Toji answers curtly. 

You nod your head, “I see. Do you like your job?”

Toji retorts with, “Do you like yours?”

“I love my job,” You remark, “I enjoy working with all my patients,” you feel Toji slightly relax underneath your massaging. You continue chatting, “Straight from high school I registered for a massage therapy program, and well, here I am.” You kneaded the tight spot on his shoulder, earning a satisfied but small groan from Toji.

“Right there,” He says, “hurts the most there.”

“I can feel it,” You comment, continuing to rub at it, “what do you like to do for fun, Mr. Fushiguro?” 

You hear Toji sigh a little, “Watch some television.”

“Oh really? Which show is your favorite?” 

“Well, it’s not a show but a movie,” You can hear the smile in his voice.

“What’s that?”

“Fifty Shades of Gray.”

You roll your eyes, “I can’t help but feel like you’re saying that to get a reaction out of me.” 

Not only does he feel more relaxed, but even his tone does as well, “I thought a lot of women liked that movie.” 

You snort, “I think you haven’t interacted with that many women then, Mr. Fushiguro.” 

“Is that so?” Toji plays along, “Well, my apologies.” 

“You don’t sound so sincere,” You deride, and then purposely press a little bit too hard on his shoulder, earning a hiss from him. “Sorry,” You say, “did that hurt?”

Toji grunts, “Yeah…” 

You apologize again and continue to knead at his skin, your palms getting a feel of his scars. Your hands move to other parts of his body, moving to his lower back. You explain to Toji as you work out what you’re focusing on, telling him how his muscles down by his lower back feel they need attention as well. Toji hums in return as you work at the tightness in his lower back. The scars are down there, too. His skin is rough overall, the more you work on his muscles, the more you confirm that Toji lied about his occupation. How could someone who works a desk job have such a body like this? He works out, despite his muscles being tight, they’re defined and toned. 

You don’t realize how long you’ve been working in silence until Toji disrupts you, “How old are you?” 

“Twenty-three,” You tell him, “and you?”

“Forty-three…you seem young to be owning a clinic at your age.”

“This clinic used to be my mom’s,” You tell him, “I took over once she…” your voice trails off and you instead say, “she became too old to handle the clinic.” 

You’re by Toji’s upper arms now, his biceps are huge. Despite his age, you can’t deny that he’s handsome. Both of your hands can’t even fully wrap around his biceps. You finish off the massage by rubbing circles with your thumbs starting from the bottom of his neck and down to his waist. 

“Okay,” You grab a cloth set on the table and wipe the oils off your hands, “I’ll give you a couple of moments to get dressed. I’ll be out in the front with your pricing.” You exit the room and calculate his session on the computer. Toji comes out with his long sleeve back on, coming to the opposite side of the desk, taking out his wallet. You told Toji the total and he took out his card, handing it to you. You grabbed the card with your eyes still on the computer screen and didn’t notice that your hand completely knocked into your cup of tea. The tea spilled over your arm, making you flinch from how hot it still was. 

“Shit!” You dropped the card. Toji’s reflexes were fast, avoiding the mug to fall completely over by catching it with his hand while his other hand grabbed your wrist. You panicked, retracting your arm to your chest, holding onto where it burned. 

“You should run that over cold water,” Toji looked alarmed as well, he was already moving around the table and to your side. “Do you have a sink here?”

“I-I do,” You stammer, “but it’s okay, I’ll wash it after I process the payment—”

“You just spilled hot tea over your arm, if you don’t rinse cold water over it now, it’ll leave a burn mark.” His green eyes are boring down at you, his entire figure towers over you, too. Your heart is hammering against your chest, this can’t be happening, no one can see your arms.

“Ms. L/N,” Toji refers to you, “where is the bathroom?” 

“I’ll do it,” You tell him weakly, “let me just process your payment…” 

Toji snatched the card off the table, “Let me rinse your arm and then you process the payment.” 

You stared at him with widened eyes, why does he care so much about you spilling tea over your arm?! Toji looked around, the office was so small, that it wasn’t hard to spot the bathroom. 

“It’s this one, right?” Toji is already walking towards the door towards the back of the lobby. He opens it, flickering on the lights, the bathroom. You’re frozen in your spot, losing a sense of your surroundings. If only you could cut right now. Your arm is burning, but then again, it’s what you desire to feel when harming yourself. You’d done it before, you had burned yourself before with matches, even a heated tea kettle, too. You’d be okay, you knew you would…

“Ms. L/N,” Toji’s voice startles you, not realizing he had made his way back to you. His eyes scan your face, he guides you to the bathroom and you follow, not occupied with trying to stay grounded. You and Toji stood in the bathroom in front of the sink, he turned on the faucet to cold water and he brought your arm underneath the running water, his hand pulling up your sleeve.

Your breath hitched in your throat, your body in paralysis mode as you waited for Toji to comment on your scarred arm. You avoided his gaze, just let your vision blur as you stared at the water running over your arm. 

“Where’s your first aid kit?” Toji asks instead.

“Under the desk,” You tell him wearily. When he steps out of the bathroom, your head hangs low, finally feeling like you can breathe. The cold water was starting to make your arm feel numb…

Toji came back into the bathroom, opened the first aid kit, and took out the supplies; ointment and bandage wrap. He turned off the water and dried your hands with the paper towels in the bathroom. He held the paper towels over your arm for a few moments, he still hadn’t addressed your self-harm scars. Silently, Toji applied ointment to your arm and wrapped up your arm. 

He then took out his card from his back pocket and set it into your palm, “I’ll be out in the front,” He stepped out and you stood there, blankly staring down at your bandaged arm and the card in your hand. 

After doing some breathing exercises that your therapist had taught you before, you went to the front, avoiding your gaze with Toji. He had one of his elbows leaned against the table. You could feel his gaze on you as your fingers stumbled across the keyboard, typing in the total price and then scanning his card. 

You handed the card to Toji and said in a weak tone, “Thank you, Mr. Fushiguro, it was a pleasure working with you.”

“I’ll call to set up another appointment for next week,” Toji’s fingers brush against yours as he takes the card from your hands, “Shiu was right, your hands are like magic.” 

You keep your head down, hiding your bandaged arm under the table. Toji leaves, and it’s then that you realize that Toji had also cleaned up the tea that had spilled on the front desk as well. 

ALSKDKDJF OKAYYY !!! I’m glad it’s not a bother !!! I overthink sometimes alskdkjf

urgh so I am having A WEEK :( I hope it’s okay I rant a bit … alslkskdj

helurf okay so after midterms last week, I’ve been trying to like relax and give myself time to rest but IVE HAD SO MANY ASSIGNMENTS :((( and I’m so tired and burnt out and stressed cause I need to start studying for finals and ahhhhhh alsksjjdjf :(

okay now for some more fun updates!! i had fun at uni yesterday!! we had a super fun soil science lab we got to go into soil pits on the farm our campus has and analyze soil (ph, diagnostic horizons, colour, structure, texture etc) !! It was a lot of fun I’m gonna miss the class and my prof :( (it was my last lab)

another fun thing is its art market week at my uni so time to drop a ton of money on prints, stickers and crocheted animals !!! :D

AND okay so I made it into a special like abroad research kinda program/course in like that’s usually only available to upper years students but somehow I made it in alskkskdjdj . Anyways, we get to go to South Africa from like May 14-June 9 to do research and stuff in the field!!! and like IM SO EXCITED??? So anyways, the 19 students that also made it in (it’s a highly competitive program to get into) we had our second group meet up plus our prof (who taught my favourite class by far last term) yesterday and it was a lot of fun and we got free dinner which was super super yum and I can’t believe I’m actually going ahhhhh

and then I went to a friends house for dinner (yes, dinner again) which was fun we like catch up at least once a month and yeah

Anyways sorry for the truck load of information about my life weh

HOW IS YOUR LIFE STAR!!! I WANNA HEAR ABOUT YOU!! (With whatever ur feeling comfy sharing 💗)

🌱

UGH I always forget how close together exam season is WHYYYY ARE UR FINALS ALREADY RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER….. 💔💔 I believe in you angel manifesting all the best for you frfr you’re smart I know you got this 🫶🫶🫶🫶

AHHHH UR UNI LAB SOUNDED SO FUN I love labs where you just get to go outside and do stuff in nature it’s fr so healing 👼 I took a geology course in college where we got to go to this creek near my school and like test the ph balance of the water and it was so much fun being outside instead of cooped up in the lecture hall fr one of the best labs we ever did. AND the art market this week???? RAHHH HAVE SO MUCH FUN we used to have something similar at my uni and I would drop SO much on stickers not even joking my laptop is covered in them still :’)

ALSO OH MY GOD??? TO THE STUDY ABROAD PROGRAM?????? STOP THAT SOUNDS SO FIXKIFNT FUNNNNN IM SO EXCITED FOR YOU WYAHWJDNRJ CONGRATS ON GETTING IN BB ‼️‼️ I didn’t have to do study abroad when I was in college bc covid hit but I can’t wait to hear all about yours and live vicariously thru ur updates AHHHH and it’s coming up so soon !! WOWOWOWOW HAVE THE BEST TIME ILY ILY THATS SO FUN

My day was honestly vvvvv boring but it was productive! I had work and then I had a shit ton of laundry to do but I was tired as fuck and I have cramps bc my period started today so I got coffee first to wake me up and then after cleaning the apartment I caught up on Ateez vlogs and now I’m simultaneously writing and watching Zelda gameplay 👼 I think my emotions are like ten times worse rn because of my period so I’m just taking it easy but I have a huge party to go to this weekend and a lot of my friends are gonna be there so I need to get my shit together and stop being sad bc I don’t want to bring the mood down ☹️ why do I always have a party in the same week I feel like shit LOL the last time I had one my situationship and I got into a huge fight and my sister had to be checking on me like every 5 minutes bc I was borderline crying the whole night it was so embarrassing 😭 (I am so tired of crying over this same girl oh my god)

ANYWAYS I LOVE U ANGEL IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU AND I CANT WAIT TO HEAR ALL ABOUT UR STUDY ABROAD TRIP RAHHH THATS SO EXCITING CONGRATS AGAIN ILY ILY 🩷💖💞💘💕💓👼

i was watching something on youtube last night and then on the side saw a song and i was like “i have no idea who this is but ima give it a listen cause i need new music” so i click it and at first at the beginning since it was a lil slow i was like “mmmm dont think this is gonna be up my alley” so i skim some forward and right when i heard her singing, my jaw dropped, and it stayed dropped the entire rest of the song

oh my god, Pandora by Suzuna Nagihara. This type of music is typically not up my alley (like i’ll find it cool but i wouldnt download it) BUT over the course of the song, the song just got more epic and epic and im like HOLY SHIT??? with every new section. Very JRPG, Nier-like, epic, full of choruses, and the banger part is the synth bEATS that are incorporated into it which i fuckin love. 

But that’s not what captivated me. What captivated me was her VOICE. Her singing. oh my god. idek where to start. It’s so airy, breathy, and LIGHT, yet she still manages hit the stronger notes at the same time when she needs to. But even her stronger notes sound light and open. Idk if it’s the help of the mixing of the song or not but omg, just, the way she sings this song fITS SO WELL FOR THIS TYPE OF SONG AND JUST WORKS SO WELL AND IT JUST MAKES THE SONG S TIER. and i love it so much. Voice aside though, the song is just kinda insane, i love the distortion/glitch at 0:44. i think it was a great way to introduce the faster speed of the song/transition into the actual (?) song. As if the part before 0:44 was just a prologue (as she sings in the lyric) ((Though I feel like the song actually starts at 1:40))

I obviously then checked out her other stuff and she does a ton of JP song covers, and of course they’re all very good, but there are definitely certain songs that works better for her voice, cause I don’t think she’s a big belter (though she can, of course). She tends to sing best with her head voice (?), which makes me think that her cover of Kaede’s Koikaze from Cinderella Girls was one of her better covers. Not saying her other covers were bad, but Koikaze and her original song Pandora are up up up up there. Singing in a head voice/falsetto is definitely her stronger suit and more to her. 

Her regular speaking voice is also very nice :)))))))))))))))))

Anyway go check the song out pls thank you, i never usually bother with writing this much about something that isn’t a sad post, SO THAT JUST SHOWS HOW POWERFULLY THIS SONG/HER VOICE HIT ME.

It’s also on the quieter side for some reason so u gotta boost ur volume, it might have been on purpose but that was a Bad choice to do that imhO. this song needs to be LOUD.

Also one last note: the part from 3:57-4:04 is so chilling cause of the way she sang it, that emotion sounded SO, SO RAW. whether she was acting or not (maybe most likely ?) it was so jaw dropping, i remember my jaw dropping more than it already dropped and breaking my floor when i got to that part for the first time.

TLDR: I love Suzuna’s Nagihara’s voice a lot, especially in her original song called Pandora, so give it a listen :)

First post! The world so far.

Hello Tumblr

This blog is gonna be about my Hardcore world, the things I do in it and the things surrounding it! This ranges from building farms in game to making the Youtube videos about them and everything else I do for this world.

From start to end

The beginning

Apologies for the clickbaity thumbnail, i dont like it either.

This is my 10th Hardcore world, hence S10. There was really only 1 other noteworthy world, S9, but its boring ahh hell compared to S10. The death of that world is what is referenced in the first clip of the vid

As usual the first thing i did was get to the End asap and beat the dragon. Lowkey speedrunning means if i die during the hardest part of the game, i lose pretty much no progress.

The video is literally just me beating the game relatively fast, and instantly getting like 3 elytras cus of sheer luck. Nothing super interesting compared to the kind of shit thats coming up.

"Early" game

Early game for me is probably not like the casual Minecraft, i pretty much start with an elytra and loot from the End cities.

Video speaks for itself mostly, i looted an Ancient city for Swift Sneak, made an xp farm, got more gear etc. all necessary to do basic stuff. Theres also a tutorial for an iron farm :DDD its very in depth and amazing! Oh and also a "stone farm" (stone generator), mob farm and yeah its still not that interesting.

The wither skeleton skull gathering compilation at the end is one of my favourite sequences ive made in a while now. Hades music is so perfect for them.

Time for farming

Hooooly shit i can barely even begin to tell you just how many farms are in this episode, its probaby best to just watch it and see for yourself.

Noteworthy is the ancient city i neutralize, you might think thats an impressive feat or that its brave. Thing is, im not brave, just fearless. Anyways like i say in the video pretty much all farms that i built are materials for a storage system somehow

Turning point

This is around the time shit hits the fan. I built a medium sized storage system that sorts out literally almost everything in the game. It features a whole bunch of sick storage tech from the storage tech discord, wired up together by myself. Right around this time, not mentioned in the video, i also switched to loading all of my farms into boxes automatically. Thats right, shulker boxes. Almost every farm i have and build load their stuff into boxes by now. This allows me to bring actual metric tons of items around without needing to load and unload everything out of shulker boxes first.

The Hole

The massive hole i made with the funny machine in the video is for a purely decorative build. The plan is to build the entire terrain from bedrock up to custom mountaintops. This is quite the task and overwhelms me constantly so i have barely worked on it.

The present

This is where the video series ends, but like you can probably tell, theres a whole lot of stuff i do for 1 video. The next video will be on its way, and it will contain 3 farms and some work on the massive building project in the hole.

If this image overwhelms you, dont worry, me too. The monster of concrete and redstone components on the left is a massive and overpowered dirt farm, that happens to also produce cobblestone, spruce logs, moss and azalea as byproducts. Designed by CUANS_FANG its more insane than i ever need it to be, which is what i strive for now. On the right side, the tower made out of moss, is a bonemeal farm, specifically Chromoss cubes by Hexatron (?). It produces enough bonemeal to keep up with the dirt farm and dumbs its overflow into shulker boxes in the storage.

The storage of this farm, shown in this image, sorts out every item. Theres a mass crafting station to turn clay balls into clay blocks, a super smelter to turn those clay blocks into terracotta and a small bone meal powered wheat farm directly fed by the bonemeal output.

Clay balls? you might ask, but the dirt farm doesnt produce those?

Thats where the clay/mud converter comes in. You can stand at the input, get fed dirt directly from the dirt farm output and place it into the converter, which pushes the dirt through the converter, turning it into mud and optionally converting it to clay. The output is send up via a water column to the central storage of the farm.

This took me like a month to put together and build, and ive used like, none of the things i got from it LMAO. But it will be useful in the future im sure (coping).

And the latest and greatest, the bamboo farm. Its ilmangos hopper minecart flying machine thing with box loader thing. Its uuh, a bit fast. Gives me the new bamboo wood really quickly tho! Dont ask me why this was the first thing i did for the new update, i havent gotten any cherry wood or armor trims LMAO, thats up next tho :).

The future

This is the latest thing that happened to the world. Next up is getting armor trims. Then ill probably be building another tree farm that lets me farm cherry and azalea as well! Will be posting stuff about it here :3

So What Is The Plan?

Mayara Khepar, Allaik Tentau | Moxie’s Smithing n’ Arms Google Doc Link | Previous Related Drabble

“Y’know, I don’t think I’ve actually been inside your new shop. Weird, huh?”

“Not really, given your uh, predicament, I guess? If anyone saw ya’ though, you’d be screwed. Don’t need more flies hoverin’ around this place.”

“Relax, doll. Y’ worry too much. But I did check already- we’re all good. May have a few eyes on this place, but not now. That’s why I chose this night.”

The explanation does little to assuage the concerns Maya has, but what else is she supposed to say? Silence fills the normally raucous workshop space the two are occupying. They seem to have a thing for creating such an awkward moment between each other. Fortunately, Mayara is the one who speaks up this time.

“Doll?” Mayara scoffs. “That’s a new one,” she says before promptly returning to finish the piece she was working on. 

It was almost done, and going towards a deal she made not too long ago. It was originally just supposed to be a standard project, but for some reason she started putting a lot more effort into it. Guess he’s getting a steal, comparatively, she thinks. Considerin’ I haven’t asked for anything yet.

“What’cha got there? Looks… old fashioned. Like one of those revolvers from a western.” Al peeks over at her worktop as she burns a design into the grip of said revolver.

“Nothin’ for you. Gimme a sec, and I’ll put this away. Just needed the momentum to finish up.”

“Don’t want it anyway. Still happy with the other one I got from ya’.” He waits somewhat impatiently as Maya puts her tools away. There’s important things they need to talk about and get set up. “So, I noticed y’ managed to get the uh, errands all ran.”

She looks over at him with a particularly neutral expression. “Guess so. The real question is, did it affect his business? Can’t really tell just from fucking shit up.”

“Oh, trust me. It did. Even overheard a conversation. ‘Take care of your little ghost problem, and maybe then we can work something out!’ Mar’s absolutely livid. Distributor wants nothin’ to do with ‘im.”

Now that puts a smile to Maya’s face. “Good, then I have his attention.” She motions him over to the center workbench, which had been cleared of tools and miscellaneous debris. Instead, laid on the table was a map with various locations marked and circled. “Part one, ruin his reputation and completely fuck his business partners over- done.”

“Heard that. Guess we’re movin’ on to the next part, eh?” Allaik points down at one of the marked locations.

“Part two. Sabotage. Chrome’s got two other small warehouses across the city. We destroy the supply, maybe take the whole building down with it. I already know what you’re gonna suggest, but for that you’re gonna need somethin’ that burns a lot hotter than gasoline.”

“Way ahead of ya’. Already got my eyes set on a sizable supply of flash powder. Or as I should call it, thermite. That stuff should do the trick, and we’ll just disable the fire suppressants while we’re there.”

Al looks almost… impressed. Maya’s not usually one to take initiative like that, or to plan things so far in advance. That’s one of the reasons he was here. “Okay, well ‘s soon as you get a hold of it, we can get that part set up. Don’t wanna do it too soon, otherwise it’s more likely that someone’ll find it-”

“-Yeah yeah, and that’s the last thing we want. I know. And you’re the one who said I worry too much, doll.” Her laugh is apparently contagious, as Al chuckles along with her.

“Fuck, when you say it, it just sounds weird. Don’t ever say that again.”

He sighs, catching his breath and returning to the matter at hand. “There’s no real time limit, but there is a night that most of the lackeys’ll be out. Probably our best night to make the point. You got ideas?”

She pauses for a moment, looking over to the corner where a small, four-legged robot was charging. “Yeah, kind of. I’ve got a ton of throwable and remote choke bombs for a decent cover. That’ll let ‘im know it’s me who’s there at least, as well as give me some room to work.”

“Fire won’t work with the choke bombs, though,” Allaik points out.

“Yeah, but we’re not burnin’ this one down, are we? It’d be fun, I admit. But there’s something in there that I want- something you can’t grab for me. That’s why you’re gonna plant these around instead.”

Mayara hands him a box- kind of small, but no shorter than his forearm. Upon peeking inside, Al sees it’s a box with small, flat disc-like devices. They’re snuggly fit into foam to avoid jostling, which means they’re somewhat delicate.

“Maya. What the fuck are these?”

“Controlled demolition explosives. Just plant those around on major supports, the whole building’ll crumble apart. Careful not to shake those around too much, don’t need my workshop blowing to pieces for a second time-”

“Second??-”

She makes a sharp noise to cut him off, and continues. “Not what you should be worryin’ about. You’re the one who wanted to burn all the hideouts down-”

“-Excuse you, arson was your brilliant idea-”

“Anyway,” she cuts off again, “that’s the best way to’ make sure what I want from there survives. Do not put a charge close to where my old shop was. ‘Kay?”

Allaik is just baffled by the request, along with the fact that these devices are supposed to be strong enough to bring the whole place down. However, he doesn’t say no. He tucks the box away into his modus, and shakes his head.

“I knew you were fucking crazy. What’s even there that you want so badly?”

“What.”

“What?”

Maya looks him dead in the eye. “...None of your business. I have my own secrets to keep, and you got yours. Just don’t need anyone seein’ it other than me- and don’t, go looking for it. That’s a threat.”

He returns The Look. “Fine. Whatever. Don’t know what’s so fucking important to you there, but I can appreciate you not diggin’ into my business well enough.” He mumbles under his breath. “Askin’ me to fuckin’ blow the place to bits. Okay,”

“Anything else you needed from me this wonderful evening, Allie?” Mayara smirks. She knows he hates that nickname.

“Fuck off, Khepar,” he chuckles. “Naw, I think that pretty much covers it, other than specifics. I’ll keep in touch though.”

“You better.”

Before he makes it out of the back door, Al turns around to face Maya again. “-And hey, try not to get yourself killed, yeah?” 

“Haven’t killed me yet, and I don’t plan on dyin’ anytime soon. Now get the fuck outta my shop before someone sees ya’.”

They Want To Get A Pet - Headcanons

Summary: Your S/O wants a pet and adorable antics ensue~ 

Characters: Hizashi Yamada, Taishiro Toyomitsu, Aizawa Shouta, Eijiro Kirishima, Tenya Iida, Hanta Sero, Takami Keigo

Contains: Gender neutral reader, lotsa fluff, Reader has arachnophobia in Sero’s part! Crackheadery in Aizawa’s part

Hizashi Yamada - Cockatoo

📣 You guys totally didn’t plan on getting a cockatoo, or any pet for that matter. Y’all just moved into your new place for christ’s sake! 

📣 But after a visit to a lil exotic pet store downtown, your plans changed. And now you’re stuck with a bird with the intelligence of a toddler

📣 According to Yama, the bird just ‘called to him’ and by that, he means the bird literally screamed at him

📣 They’ve got the most bougie cage ever like MTV cribs hit them up. 

📣But he doesn’t spend too much time in there as you guys let him roam around the house all day until it’s time for bed or if you leave for a while

📣 If they’re not attached to Yama’s shoulder, you often find them waddling around the house, picking things up off of the floor and throwing them, and squawking at you when they want attention

📣 Sounds like someone else you know huh…

📣 Yama and the bird dance together so much omg. They do the lil head bobs together, he’ll blast some music for them and they go to town he even chirps along to the lyrics omg-

📣 He doesn’t even have to teach them words, they just pick them up on their own… and then never stop saying them… ever 

📣 ‘YEAHHHHH’ then from the other side of your home you hear another ‘YEAAHHHHH’

📣 Make it stop

📣 You taught them cuss words for the shits and giggles though

📣 Yama finds it funny too though because he’s got that 8-year-old sense of humor… you all do to be honest 

📣 But when the bird chooses to sit on your shoulder you bet your ass Yamada’s gonna fawn over the two of you for the next hour :’) 

Taishiro Toyomitsu - Pyrenean Mastiff

🍢 Really wants a pet 

🍢 But also really scared of crushing them so…

🍢 You guys settle for a big ‘ol Pyrenean mastiff!

🍢 And when I say they’re big they are big like… I mean knock you over if you’re not careful big

🍢 They’re literally perfect for each other

🍢 They’re both massive units, insanely adorable, and they for sure share the same appetite

🍢 Speaking of food, he makes sure he’s feeding them the best of the best foods even if that means y’all are making it yourselves

🍢 Not as afraid to roughhouse with them as he thought he’d be

🍢 Lots of fetching, frisbee throwing, ‘wrestling’ even?? They’re so rowdy and for what? My heart, that’s what <3 

🍢 The dog definitely sleeps on top of him I don’t make the rules

🍢 Mf just hops on up, curls up and they’re ready to go like--- Is that- is that not y’know,,, HEAVY?? 

🍢 I mean,,, you sleep on top of him too so I honestly don’t think Tai cares too much

Aizawa Shota - Cat

💤 You guys already know…

💤 If he were to get any kind of pet it’d be a cat.

💤 They’re chill, independent, and sometimes want attention. Just how he likes it.

💤 Well… that’s how he thought that things should be but-

💤 BOY was he wrong

💤 After living together for quite a while, stalking animal shelter websites for the perfect cat, and finding the right one, you bring them home!

💤 When you met them at the shelter, they were a sweet lil baby with an aloof attitude that you both fell in love with

💤 But when you brought them home… They became an absolute crackhead.

💤 Forget having ANYTHING on the tables or countertops. It’s on the floor now thanks to them. Fuck your water glass, fuck those papers you were helping Aizawa grade, they’re gone! Shredded! Positively destroyed :)

💤 Forget having free hands, they’re literally attached to his side and won’t stop rubbing against his hands while he’s grading papers and such

💤 If you’re not watching his little dude/ette will try and eat food WHILE YOU’RE COOKING oh my fuckingf god

💤 Heaven forbid this dude tries to leave the room. They’ll ‘cry’ until he comes back.

💤 ‘Go to your other parent, they’ll give you attention.’ ‘mEEEOWWW’ ‘Oh my god fine come here.’

💤 Honestly though he really appreciates when they’re down to sleep. Their purrs and their cuddles are very appreciated

💤 And literally just imagine seeing them curled up on his chest while they sleep on the couch ;; im so somft

Eijiro Kirishima - Bearded Dragon

🏮 This man wants to get THE manliest pet of all,,, a bearded dragon

🏮 He probably saw one on a movie or something and immediately came to you like

🏮 ‘Okay but we neeeeed one just look at their lil beards!! And their tongues!!!’

🏮 You tell him to put it off for a bit, do some research, and see if he still wants one later

🏮 Homeboy is DEDICATED so he puts in the time and ofc he still wants one after the fact

🏮 After a good amount of time, he comes back with a books worth of reasons as to why you guys should get one and you’re honestly shocked

🏮 You just can’t say no to those eyes </33 so you oblige and go out and get one from an owner who’s surrendering it (Because we don’t support chain pet stores in this household)

🏮 You guys can’t pick a name for them so for the longest time they’re just called ‘the lizard’ or ‘little fella’ or whatever else you guys come up with

🏮 Anyways- he’s infatuated with them it’s so funny. He spends all of his freetime watching them get used to their new habitat like,,,, all of it. It’s 1am and he’s just watching it hang out and you’re like ‘Kiri if you love it so much then why don’t you sleep with it’ (not in that way ya nasty)

🏮 HE TAKES IT SERIOUSLY

🏮 Next thing you know he hops out of bed, brings them back and puts them between your pillows.

🏮 Lil homie’s just vibin there.

🏮 You’re done tbh but if Kiri’s happy then you’re happy <33

🏮 Absolutely lets it sit on his shoulders when he’s walking around the house

🏮 He has a leash for them and he takes them out during the warmer months

🏮 Dedicates a good portion of his day to clean out their habitat when need be

🏮 Their relationship is just so cute you can’t help but melt every time you see them together

Tenya Iida - Tropical Fish

🌟 After a particularly rough finals season, you figure that Iida needs to have some sort of hobby that can help him chill out, but also has some sort of brainwork in there because that’s your boyfriend for ya

🌟 You suggest getting some fish!

🌟 He rly said ‘I’ll think about it’ then proceeded to do a shit ton of research on it because he literally does that every time you express interest in something. King behavior!!

🌟 You guys settle on getting a few tropical fish and a super nice fish tank for ‘em

🌟 He lets you name all of them and of course you have to name one ‘Iida junior’ like how could you not-

🌟 But seriously though he finds it so endearing and sweet ;;

🌟 You can’t tell me he doesn’t buy all of the nicest shit he can for their tank too.

🌟 Fresh aquatic plants, huge rocks for them to swim through, a nice ass heater, the WORKS

🌟 He’s gotta treat yall’s babies right like what did you expect

🌟 Constantly checking their water to see if it’s alright for them

🌟 He’s usually the one to feed them so whenever he comes up to the tank, they all crowd up by the top like doggies when their owner comes home omg

🌟 He finds the noises from the tank to be really good background noise when he’s reading or studying

🌟 Iida’s honestly glad that you suggested to get fish ‘cause taking care of them is such a relaxing hobby and lord knows he needs some of those

Hanta Sero - Rose Haired Tarantula

🧵 So he wants a Rose Hair Tarantula...

🧵 ‘Absolutely not’ - You, 2021 (sorry if you actually like spiders lol, if a singular person wants hcs where y’all both like spiders please @ me)

🧵 Lots and lots of begging and promises

🧵 ‘You won’t even have to clean the cage, I’ll do it!!’ ‘We can keep them in the spare room’ ‘c’mooon pretty please???’

🧵 He had to bust out the puppy eyes for you to say yes

🧵 And with that, you’re now the proud parents of a demon rose hair tarantula!

🧵 ‘We can keep them in the spare room’ your ass. He lets it climb all over him while he’s walking around the house!!

🧵 Not you actively avoiding him when you see them coming down towards you

🧵 ‘But I wanna kiss!!’ ‘Kiss your tarantula smh’

🧵 After he realizes he’s not gonna get any with his lil buddy (yes, that’s what he calls them) he tries his best to help you familiarize with em

🧵 I’m sorry but he’s trying so hard not to laugh as you freak out when they crawl up your arm

🧵 He takes things more seriously after that though. He’ll give you lil words of encouragement, back pats and such

🧵 He’s so happy that you become… tolerable after a while of you guys just hangin’ out that you can’t help but feel proud too.

🧵 You still can’t stand spiders though.  

Keigo Tamaki - Bunnies

🐤 Just like Aizawa, he wants something that’s quiet and can be independent since his schedule is a bit busy but he still wants to have a lil buddy to love on

🐤 You’re actually the one to bring up the idea to get a bunny, it’s part of a long list of ideas you had come up with, but for whatever reason, the bunny idea just stuck with him

🐤 You two hop (im a comedic genius hi <33) on over to the nearest rescue you can find, and browse through the enclosures looking for the perfect bunny for you guys 

🐤 Ok so like- here’s the thing,,,

🐤 You totally didn’t plan on getting two bunnies… But you guys found a pair that were literally inseparable and y’all had to have them

🐤 He’s already calling them ‘Our children’ straight off the bat like- y’all JUST got home and he’s already giving you baby fever UGH

🐤 He bunny-proofs the FUCK out of the house so they can roam freely ‘cause he didn’t just get these babies to stick them in a cage smh

🐤 Will lay on the floor and just watch them romp around cus he finds it relaxing and funny 

🐤 Also please get on the floor and watch them with him. Prime cuddling hours

🐤 They burrow under his wings… I repeat- THEY BURROW UNDER HIS WINGS

🐤 They WILL flop together don’t @ me 

🐤 They (and by they I mean all three of them)  flop on you when they want attention can I jst--- *cries*

🐤 Have fun trying to get up, this is your life now. 

🐤 But are you really complaining? You shouldn’t be smh 

Avengers: College Edition

Steve: Criminal Justice and Studio Art double major. He doesn't want to torture himself with anything difficult and still wants to study what he loves. He is still an over achiever though. Highkey hates frat parties, saw someone twerking upside down and almost cried but stayed because hes the designated driver (responsible KING). prefers small get togethers with his friends. Roommates with sam and bucky!! Joins Criminal Justice club, jokingly rivals with Engineering (Tonys Club) Everyone on campus loves him including the professors, wins Homecoming king and is very happy. Sam jokingly asks to be his queen, Bucky butts in and says "NO, im his queen". Can be found in the library or art studio, usually with ink or pencil markings on his hands.

Tony: Obvi an engineering KING has physics as a minor. procrastinates to the max "No Bruce I have everything under control" *crams for 46 hours straight on a constant IV drip of Redbull and coffee* Super smart and helps draw the blueprint for the new engineering building. Roomies with Bruce! Tony was in a frat for a bit his freshmen year but hated it and wanted real friends (Throws better parties anyway) met Bruce and all the other avengers during a 1301 intro class. Pulls women like no tomorrow. On the presidents list every semester and tutors math for free on the side. He is basically the Dad in STEM. Tries hitting on Natasha but she is just like :/ nah, when her and bruce start dating tony is surprised because bruce is his "quiet little cinnamon roll." Tony constantly teases bruce and is like "yall fuckin (;" Steve butts in "tONY PLZ I JUST WANT TO WATCH THIS MOVIE" Bruce is thankful for steves intervention. You know how he rivals Steves Criminal Justice club? He butts heads with Business Clubs leader (Pepper) until everyone catches them together at a party. Has a caffeine addiction. Works out with Thor and Bucky one day in the rec and almost dies.

Bruce: Physics and Engineering double major (Hardworking KING) In math club with Vision and Wanda. He loves being roomies with Tony because it helps him out of his shell. Likes to draw with Steve sometimes and enjoys the quiet. Doesn't procrastinate and gets things done in a timely manor. 4.0 icon we all strive to be. Him and Nat already know each other, but bond and get a lot closer while studying in the library and they eventually start dating. He takes her coffee when she works across campus and is always almost late to class because of that (He doesn't care though bc thats his BABY) "Um.. Bruce your class is in 5 minutes" "Okay and?.....Wait I have an ex-" *Sprints to his building* Takes boxing at night with Thor, Bucky, Sam and Steve!!! Loves sparring with Thor and can surprisingly take the big buy on pretty well. Gets his butt kicked by Natasha in a MMA class though.

Natasha: Majors in Criminal Justice and Minors in Psychology. Ballet club AND MOCK TRIAL!! Has a Job at the Criminal Justice Deans office and takes MMA classes on the side. She is on Mock Trial with Loki and they actually get along quiet well once they stop butting heads about the case. Introduces Sam and Wanda to dance and they have so much fun. Coffee dates with Bruce!! Her and Steve become RAs in the following years and are the coolest RAs you know. Prefers night classes, Bruce walks her to all of them. Psychology classes are her favorite and really wants to help children one day. Volunteers at a daycare during breaks. Sis can really out drink Tony and Thor. Puts Wanda under her wing and helps her with fafsa and what not. Her and Bucky get the Russian language credit by simply testing out. Has her sh!t together and while she has a lot on her plate she can take it. She is really the Mom of the group. Can be found dancing or with Bruce. Her and Clint are icons in psychology classes.

Clint: Deaf Studies with education minor! (we stan deaf clint in the comics) In the Archery club and wins nationals for the Uni. Loves to draw with Steve. Helps Bruce ask Natasha out! PRANK ICON! loves to do prank wars with tony, bucky, loki and sam. Was in the same frat with Tony but hated it as well. While he seems to have a more reserved demeanor he is still the life of the party. (Like he knows people at the clubs ya know?) Can get in anywhere and helps everyone rent out a club for the night in celebration of midterms being over. Loves reading in the library and loves morning classes and being productive early in the day. Cracks Tonys netflix and hulu passwords (no tony... tonyr0cks69 is not good enough) Wants to teach at a school for the Deaf. Bruce sets him up with a girl from engineering and that is his future wife.

Thor: Physical Education major and Communications minor! Here on a football scholarship and is in a frat (not the asshole one tony was in) and is a partying ICON. Tries to get Loki to party but Loki just wants to drink wine with the cat he snuck into his dorm. Learns Sign from Clint to prepare for his career in education. Loves working out with Bucky, Sam and Steve. Takes up boxing during football off season and spars with Bruce. Despite being everyones fav himbo he gets really good grades and is a very good writer. Loki dorms across the hall from him. Thor actually rooms with Peter. Peter is the freshman baby and Thor takes peter under his wing and introduces him to everyone and helps him with college stuff in general. Also hooks him up with MJ and brings him to the occasional boxing session. Has a loud booming laughter you can hear in all floors of the library when he sees a funny meme. One time he actually makes a very good point and notices a flaw in one of Tony and Bruces projects leaves everyone stunned. Picks on Loki in big brother fashion. Unironically calls weed the devils lettuce.

Loki: Pre-Law and Criminal Justice. LOVES to argue. (Devils advocate ass) In Mock Trial and Criminal Justice Club. Tony jokingly calls him steves sexy secretary in CJ club. Loves Mock Trial and is the president with Nat as his right hand woman. Sneaks a cat he found at the shelter into his dorm and names it muffin. Stays in the Library writing or going over cases. The one time he was taking Natasha a copy of the Mock Trial case packet and caught her and bruce smooching. (He screeched) "Haha funny joke yall heres the case packet BYE." He automatically texts the group chat "i think nAT AND BRUCE HAVE SOME TEA FOR US HMM". Lets Peter and Bruce come over to his dorm because he knows their roommates can get a little too much sometimes. Loki also becomes an avid twitter user and thats how he gains popularity on campus. (He called the uni out for their awful and expensive parking) Was able to convince the Dean with tony and steve to create a new parking lot. Caffeine addict!!! Him and Tony always bump into each other at the coffee shop. Brings baked goods to meet ups with the gang. Loves to play pranks (especially on Tony) Him and Bucky come up with a genius prank on him and even get pepper involved. Best dressed on campus and is in the fashion club. He is the embodiment of dark academia.

Sam: Criminal Justice Major with Aerospace Engineering minor. Gets introduced to Bucky and Steve during move in and they literally become brothers. Is both in Criminal Justice Club and Engineering Club. In the Historically Black Frat on campus and takes huge pride in that. Parties with tony and thor BIG TIME. Procrastinates by throwing paper airplanes at Bucky until Bucky is like "Um...dude your paper is due in like two hours." At that moment Sam got into work faster than he ever had. Loves gossip sessions with Loki and Wanda. Works out a lot with Bucky, Steve and Thor to get rid of stress. When he and Bucky finish a final they go to loki's dorm and ask "Hey can we see your cat." Helps prep food for friends-giving and decorates the dorm for holidays. HATES 8ams so so so much. Steve promises him pancakes if he gets up and goes. Binge watches shows during weekends and screams when Destiel is finally canon. Loves running and gets a Track Scholarship when Thor gets him to join a sport. Gets Peter to join track.

Bucky: criminal justice major and psychology minor. Buck is also in ballet club with Nat, it really helps him relax and gives him a free space to think (also he runs that shit like no ones business) Criminal justice club as well and LOVES to work out and box. One time Sam accompanies him to ballet and Bucky pushes Sam into a split... the scream was heard for miles. "Sam ballet is good for athletes it helps w-" "Yeah but its not good for my balls" Doesn't willingly procrastinate but once in awhile he will forget an assignment, you best believe his eyes will snap open from his nap and get to work asap. For one of his psyche labs he had to question Steve as if he were Steve's therapist to which Steve responds "Hey bro you dont have to hit a nerve that deep" He also likes to do dance with peter since it helps him get away from Thor for a bit. Not a big partier but once the weight of finals are off his chest you best believe he will go all out. Picks on Nat and says hes gonna steal her man, to which tony interjects and says "Not if I do first" Bucky also has a very comfy dorm, comfy lighting and tons of pillows, the man loves his sleep... and so does everyone else. Sometimes he finds peter, sam, THOR, tONY EVERYONE just napping in his bed before their study time. Overall, bucky is a smart boy and his time in college is kind to him.

Wanda: English Major and Education Minor. After being an orphan Wanda knows what it feels like to not have a parental figure there and she wants to change that for other kids by becoming an english teacher. She volunteers at an orphanage, specifically the one her and pietro were in for a brief moment when they came to the states. She loves to draw as well and takes plenty of art classes with steve. She paints a portrait of the entire gang and gives it to tony as a graduation present (he cried). She loves to do volunteer work for children and also spend a lot of time in the library, She helped Nat calm down before Bruce asked her out. Her and Loki are in constant competition for best dressed. "Loki ill let you win best dressed but you have to let me see your cat" "ugh fine... btw your shirt doesnt match your boots" "hEY" Her and Peter take alot of intro classes together and are constantly running around craft stores trying to get the right stuff for projects. Visits Vision at his Job on Campus and he visits her where she volunteers and eventually they start dating. She is constantly getting visited by pietro at 4am asking "Um do you have milk" "Pietro its 4am what do you ne-" "my OREOS"

Pietro: Track star business major, frat ICON with Thor. poor boy is STRESSED he hates college and is here on a track scholarship, constantly late and running around getting shit done. Queen of late assignments but still gets them graded because he is in Track. Yeah he has alot on his plate but he still parties with thor for hours. When he is drowning in assignments Clint is always there to help him, Bruce also helps him with biology and the more science-y classes. Likes to mess around and race sam at track practice. Not into coffee but will run on all the monster energy drinks you could possibly buy. Seriously is tired of 8 a.m courses, he just wants to nap after practice. Walks into the study room that everyone was in and actually looks more sleep deprived than tony. He gets a lot of tips from steve on how to have an easier time in college and it really helps him.

Vision: Grad student working on a civil engineering masters and a TA. Meets Wanda in the library and she asks him where the biographies are. He mistakenly says they are on the 2nd floor "Uh theyre actually on the third" "Then why did you ask?" "Cause I wanted to talk to you :)" He swooned. Through Wanda he met Tony and Bruce and became their best friend, He helped out a lot with engineering club and got them far. He spends a lot of time doing research for his masters degree, he loves relaxing with the group on weekends and picks on pietro as if he is already apart of the family. Him and Loki bond over intellectual conversations from time to time. Bruce and Nat go on double dates with him and Wanda. Went to a bar once with tony and bruce and had to stop tony from singing Queens entire discography, he had the best night that night. Helps everyone with getting into jobs and into grad school in general while everyone helps him let loose and have some fun.

Peter: Peter is a Physics major and eventually works his way up to biochemistry. (hardworking icon) He is the freshman baby of the group and is introduced to them through Thor. He dances with Buck and Nat sometimes as well. Tony obviously takes peter under his wing and helps him with assignments. One time everyone was in the same study room and him and pietro have a redbull shot gunning challenge. When Peter wins Thor picks him up and almost yeets the poor boy into the ceiling. "VERY WELL DONE YOUNG PARKER YOU SHOULD BE DOING THAT WITH BEER IN NO TIME." "Thor plz" Tony and Thor help him ask MJ out and even spy on them during a dinner date. (Imagine thor with sunglasses and a scarf around his head pretending to be tonys date) He feels so accepted in college because of the gang and gets all his work done on time. Goes out of his way to get everyone christmas presents and is so excited for friendsgiving. Becomes a little stressball during finals and midterms and stays in the library till it closes. He spots loki alot in there and helps loki with science classes while loki helps him with political science classes. He meets MJ through wanda and is obviously blushing the whole time while being introduced. Gets embarrassed when the guys flirt with aunt may. "guys plz stop" This is when Sam earns his "milf hunter" nickname. "Pete hows your aunt?" "She doesnt want you sam i-" its not like that... actually it is like that"

Coulson: Alumni Icon. Is the gangs Intro professor and is the reason why everyone meets eachother. (the class was chaotic indeed) Coulson loved that class so much and he still gets visited by everyone from time to time. He is obviously close with Nick. They were there that night when Tony was signing Queen at the bar and couldnt help but laugh.

Nick Fury: Dean for criminal justice and is heavily involved with criminal justice club and mock trial. He is tired of everyones shit as always. Makes a tiktok account for the criminal justice club and has no idea how to manage social media so gets Loki to help. Has to delete it when Loki commented "hah losers" on the engineering tiktoks page. He looks intimidating but in his office he has a picture with the club and has all the gifts he gets on display. (He even framed lokis comment because it was hilarious afterall)

ariana birthday hcs !! —

it’s september 1st in south korea & japan rn,,,, so you know what that means

26th birthday hcs 👁👁

(this post is long as hell so brace urselves lmao)

on the morning of her birthday, ariana is woken up by either twitter and message notifications or her husband

her fans are blowing up her mentions with birthday wishes and her family & friends are doing the same, so bet that she has about a million notifs

since byakuya gets ready for work before ariana, he usually comes back to wake her up (even if she’s already up lol)

he hands her coffee (a caramel macchiato with a shit ton of cream and three sugars), tells her “good morning” and “happy birthday, love,” and kisses her on the forehead

(SOBBINFGMNBKJHBMK)

they usually have a short lil conversation about whatever (what they’re going to do that day, ariana’s birthday, other random topics) before byakuya tells ariana to go to work lol

but before she does, she usually opens twitter and scrolls down her birthday hashtags (which are already trending with about 100,000 or so tweets lmao), and responds to her text messages

three hashtags i came up with are “#AutumnFairyAri,” “#26WishesForAriana,” and “#아름이하트27개” (#27HeartsForAhreum) 🥺

(the last one is because ariana is 27 in korea lol)

guaranteed that she’s smiling like an idiot at those tweets lol

if her fans are lucky, ariana might like their post. if they’re extra lucky, she might even respond-

(cue the combustion of her fanbase)

then she posts a lil morning selfie, thanks her fans for all the birthday wishes, complains about how she has to go to work on her birthday, and then she finally gets ready for work lol

as ariana does, her fanbase is literally in flames lmao they’re screaming at her new selfie (“LOOK AT HER HAIR OMG MNJSHFJFMNGJ” - one of ariana’s fans, most likely), flooding her comment section, and taking over the trending page

ari and byakuya usually leave together, and ariana gets dropped off first, so when she does, they usually say goodbye to each other & byakuya gives her another kiss on the head

ofc they say “i love you” to each other, and if anyone around them has sumn to say about it, then byakuya can just make their jobs disappear !! 😗✌🏽

once ariana gets to work, she’s immediately greeted by another round of birthday wishes and the occasional gift (because oh my GOD she gets so many from her staff)

the best gift comes from her manager of 22 years, yoo miyeon. that woman is literally like ariana’s second mother it’s so cute-

miyeon usually says something along the lines of “remember when you were shorter than me ???” (it is now the other way around lmao)

near the end of her day, ariana sits in her company’s conference room, goes live on vlive, and opens the shit ton of gifts, cards, letters, and bouquets that were sent to her by her fans (and god damn doesn’t she get a lot-)

(ariana loves the bouquets,,, she literally squeals every time she sees that she got another one :(( she’ll be making flower arrangements with all of them later on lol and she’ll probably go live again 👁👁)

her birthday lives are one of the things ariana loves the most. she gets to speak to her fans, speak to her staff all casually, and her fans get to see her again. it’s a win-win :))

(bet, byakuya is watching that live when he has the time and has sent a message to ariana. when she spots his message, knows it’s him, and gets incredibly happy is one of the best moments of the live)

she also speaks to her family (they’re all in korea and america while she’s in japan 😕) during the live !! near the end, ari blows out the candles of the cakes that were bought for her by her staff and her family, and she answers questions from her fans

(lol remember back in 2011 when ari’s fans thought she was gonna finish high school & come back to korea, but instead she met this tall blond mf, fell in love with him, moved in with him, and then ended up marrying him 10 years later so now she’s really not coming back ??? lmao good times 🤣🤣🤣)

it’s a v nice moment & if you miss it, that’s such a loss lol ariana rarely goes live since she’s always so busy

after well over 12 hours, ari’s work day is finally over. on those types of days, she gets home before byakuya at around 7 or 8pm

after work, both of them go to dinner !! :))

while byakuya is coming home, ariana just gets ready. there’s a dress from byakuya that was hung by his staff in ariana’s closet (it’s black and designer, ofc 🙄✋🏽), and all ari has to do is shower, do her hair and makeup, pick out her shoes, and pick out a bag from the literal hundreds that she has

say it with me, y’all !! bag hag

ariana goes live on instagram while she does that as some kind of “get ready with with me” thing. she gets to talk to her fans again (especially her stan twitter ones lol), ask how she should style her hair & do her makeup, and ask what accessories she should choose

she also plays music in the background (especially britney spears, christina aguilera, the pussycat dolls, rihanna, nelly furtado, gwen stefani, lee hyori, or hyuna because they make her feel hotter than she already is lmao) !!

and ari sings to whatever’s playing and she gets haruka-

(am i allowed to put her here ??? i’ll just put here here lol 🤪)

-to say hi & help with her hair and makeup, so ariana’s lives are just a gold mine worth of content lmao

byakuya comes home just a lil while before ariana’s finished, and ofc, she forces asks him to say hi to her fans

lmao all that man does is silently wave with the world’s straightest face, and the chat is just yelling about how fine he is (“GO OFF RICH BOY” - one off ariana’s fans, probably). like HE’S NOT DOING ANYTHINGFGDHMBK

but as they should 😩☝🏽

ariana asks her fans if she should leave or stay on the live for a while longer, and ofc, they usually say that she should stay,,,, but that woman rarely listens tbh ASMNKHJFMNJK

she might stay for like,,, 5 minutes, but usually, she just leaves lmao

a lil while before she and byakuya leave, they talk to each other and to haruka for a while, and haruka probably most definitely takes polaroid pictures of ari and byakuya before they leave lol

(ariana def posts those on twitter later and all byakuya does is retweet them)

(but ofc he’ll tweet out a post wishing his wife a happy birthday,,, okay byakuya, look at you making progress !!)

the restaurant ariana and byakuya go to is of course very fancy and luxurious (it probably serves french cuisine too lmao). ari insists that they get a table on the rooftop, and since it’s her birthday (and since he loves her sm), byakuya complies :))

they talk the entire night, and if she can, ariana reaches over to hold byakuya’s hand most of the time :((

(taking a bit from rae’s hcs on how byakuya would celebrate his s/o’s birthday,,,,, like i’ve kinda been doing the whole time 🚶🏽‍♀️)

after dinner, the two of them will take a walk through tokyo. ariana would love it (well, not really, because she’s wearing literal heels lmao), especially since she and byakuya rarely get to do things like that. she’ll be taking pictures of things she finds interesting and would 100% ask byakuya to take pictures of her (and vice versa)

(she’s posting those on twitter too,,, ariana nation is getting fed well lol)

and then they can finally go back home and stay home, and ariana can finally open the rest of her gifts !!

they’re gifts from her family, her close friends, and of course, from byakuya and haruka !! ari’s literally smiling the whole time as she opens her presents (especially the ones from her family,,, hayley’s homemade birthday cards are always so cute 🥺), and haruka has that polaroid camera out again

(ariana: does anything)

(haru: you’re doing great sweetie !! 😀📸)

idk exactly what ariana would want for her birthday (tmw you don’t even know the preferences of your own character 🧍🏽‍♀️), but most likely, it’s either something homemade or a designer item lmao (mainly another purse-)

fun fact: her aunt josephine spoils the shit out of her lol like ariana could see a bunch of bags from chanel, louis vuitton, and yves saint laurent and automatically think “yeah, that’s my aunt lol”

ariana facetimes her family again, as well !! they get to speak to byakuya and haruka, they sing “happy birthday” to her in korean, they ask her if she liked their gifts, and it’s just a very cute family moment :))

it’s like,,, 11pm by the time ari finishes opening her presents, so she really has to go to bed

before that though, she spams her followers with the pictures that were taken, and posts one last “thank you” tweet before her birthday inevitably ends 😕

(well not really since it’s gonna be september 1st in other parts of the world lmao)

“everyone! thank u sooo much for all the birthday wishes u gave me today! it wouldn’t have been such a great one without y’all, my family, my best friends, my husband (@ByakuyaTogami), and my no. 1 fan, my sister-in-law lmao (@harukaonice). i love each and every single one of y’all with my entire heart, and i’m so glad u love me just as much 🥺 i saw as many of ur posts as i could, and i just wanna thank y’all for reaching over a million tweets! can’t believe y’all think that i’m that important lol (i mean, ofc i am 🙄✋🏻) anyways, once again, thank y’all smmmm! love y’all lots!! <3 ari <3” - ariana’s tweet 🥺 (that she posts in four different languages lol; english, korean, japanese, and french !!)

(SHE’S SUCH A SWEETHEART IM LITERALLY CRINGHMNHJDJGKM)

then ariana and byakuya finally go to sleep (it’s like 1am now jesus christ-), and ariana’s twitter notifications are still blowing tf up lmao

n e ways, that ends this behemoth of a post !! happy birthday to my baby, ariana park and even though she doesn’t exist (😕), i hope she enjoys it to the fullest !!

bonus !!

if she has a public appearance scheduled before or on her birthday, if fans are allowed to attend, they sing “happy birthday” to her whenever they see her !!

like, she could be entering a building and they would sing it, and then she could exit a few hours later & they’ll sing it again lol

ariana’s just like, “babes, you already sang this to me earlier !!”

when it comes to her “more important” birthdays (although her birthdays are always important)—such as her 18th, 20th, or 21st birthdays—ariana will throw quite a big party. like there would be a bunch of celebrities and popular society figures on the list,,, it would be a whole spectacle that the average person could only dream of getting into lmao (like me, ofc 🚶🏽‍♀️)

when ari was a child, her parents would throw a birthday party for her nearly every year lol,,, and while they were living in korea together, they would have dinner with nearly their entire family, too

(she always got two cakes, too,,, like it’s just kinda tradition for the park family at this point lol)

since ariana and jungkook (from bts) share the same birthday, either one of them message each other to wish each other a happy birthday !! ari also sends him a gift, while jungkook posts said gift on twitter and probably fanboys,,, i have a feeling that he would be a fan of her and her dramas,,, as well as the rest of bts

(they have each other’s numbers because ariana is a korean celebrity and they’ve attended events together on multiple occasions,,, ofc she and bts know each other lmao)

and i forgot to mention, but haruka would totally watch ariana’s birthday vlive if she didn’t have practice or something,,, probably sending as many messages as she can & aggressively hearting the live lmao,,, that girl really is ariana’s biggest fan SKJMNNFJMK

i also forgot to mention that JH entertainment (ariana’s agency) releases photos from a birthday photo shoot that they did with her !! they have different themes every year and they’re always so cute :((

they’re also taken prior to ariana’s actually birthday, especially since she’s always in japan now lol (but like,,, how do people not notice her going back and forth between korea & japan sometimes-)

(also, big verified accounts and celebrities on twitter & instagram wishing ariana a happy birthday >>>>>)

(celebrity tingz 🤪)

n e ways, now i’m done !! happy birthday, ari ilysm <3

(the character of haruka togami belongs to @raes-ramblings, btw !!)

im definitely not ripping off my friend by making a list of au ideas i have no siree //gonna slap this under a readmore cause i. well i say a lot. all of the time. i tried so hard to format this Good but tumblr fucked me up i am so sorry

so first-off i know i already have one WIP AU (Auckland) on ao3 so i wont talk about That one cause like. spoilers. i actualyl have it like 80% created so its likely gonna truly get finished for once and i dont wanna ruin shit

the other one ive posted about is something me and ben (catgirlrepublic) have worked on together its not at all close to done or anything but it's. a fun little crossover. Between jdate and my fuckinuhm. Original characters story “Untitled Villains Project”. the sketches of the comic version ive started is actually my pinned post 👉👈 its like the first chunk of the story, i think half of part 1? yea.

Tldr john fucking Somehow is able t oget into contact with a certain curious scientist from another reality who’d just love to study the Soy Sauce, most certainly not for her own nefarious purposes

John and Dave meet up with the scientist, her name is Boss, and her lab assistant, Toxic, and after a bit of a preliminary Vibe Check where john determines her trustworthy (which Dave doesnt agree with,) the two agree to be taken to the world UVP is set in. from there they stay in Boss’s lab (big old fucking abandoned military lab). John and Toxic are fast friends due to mutual love-of-chaos. John n Dave get to fuckin, camp out on an air mattress.

The day after they arrive, the two get split up, not exactly intentionally; big plot points of UVP are liek. Fueled by Boss sending Toxic to go fetch her “research materials,” which are usually important artifacts

Fuckin side note i guess i have to explain my dumb bullshit: Boss’s, uh, field of expertise so to speak is actually fckin, basically the scientific study of magic and superpowers n shit like that. This shit’s all real in that world. Toxic’s got fuckin superpowers, so do 4 other main characters, whatever. It’s got a bit to do with spirituality, iss Boss’s hypothesis. So she has Toxic fetch important artifacts that might have “energies” to them. The thing is actually way more fuckin complictated than that, this is just Boss’s initial hypothesis.

Motherfucking anyways. So Boss gives Toxic a job to do, and John get excited about how Cool that sounds, and ends up going with Toxic, leaving Boss and Dave alone. Neither is thrilled about this. But Dave and Boss get to have a bit of conversation (while Toxic and John are off bonding and having a good time) and come to a… mutual grudging understanding of some kind. They still dont like each other though lmao

Theres gonna be deeper shit going on but we havent sorted it out yet/tbh havent like Written For It in a while but i still like thinking about it a lot lol

Also pretty sure our endgame is john and dave steal toxic and bring them back with em lmao boss is kind of not nice and toxic would most certainly be better off in Undisclosed. Actually theyd fucking love it. Theyd become a local cryptid im sure. Undisclosed’s mothman is a teleporting spike baby.

I have. Another crossover AU that i might. Post something about for halloween? Maybe? If i have it finished?

Crosses over into, you guessed it, another one of my original-character projects. God, am i vain or something?

I promise this is just because i think blue and dave should get to team up to beat up some monsters

Quick briefing on my fuckinuh. Original character story, this one doesnt have a name (yet? Idk lol my work never actually goes anywhere sso who gives a shit). It centers around two grim reapers, Red (26, bi woman) and Blue (22, aroace agender asshole). In this reality or whatever, grim reapers function kind of like low-level office workers. They get told who’s going to die + when by some middle-management types, and upper management only involve themselves when punishment needs to be doled out. These Higher-Ups can be seen as analogous to Korrok; they’re decidedly not human, never were, and fucking terrifyingly powerful. Additionally, grim reapers are sort of .. designed to be “background noise” people. In reality theyre supernatural beings and, uh, look Real Fuckin Weird (the whole deal has a neon aesthetic im terrible at drawing uwu) but most humans just perceive them like extras in a movie. A body’s there but the camera’s not focused on it.

To the narrative: the shit starts when Red n Blue get relocated to Undisclosed. Relocation is something that just happens every now and then to reapers; they usually work in teams, but they get split up into different cities to avoid any strong bonds forming (a counter-union strategy from the Higher-Ups).

Red, Blue, John and Dave end up running into each other for the first time in a McDonalds where John n Dave are getting some 4am “hey, we just survived another horrific monster fight” celebration burgers. John and Dave are the only two people who can see how… strange Red and Blue are. Nobody else notices.

John unintentionally pisses Blue off, leading to Blue whacking him upside the head with a dildo bat. They all four get kicked out of McDonald’s. Dave and Red both are less than thrilled

Blue and John end up resolving their differences, somehow. Red and Dave briefly bond over their dumbass best friends being, well, dumbasses. They all part ways amicably.

somehow-or-other (idk yet) they end up running into each other a few more times, and eventually john invites them over to his place, and the four (plus Amy now!) get to know each other a little better

while there, Blue gets a text about some guy who's gonna die and John offers to drive them to where that's gonna go down. they take him up on the offer and get to have a bit of one-on-one conversation

after that ordeal though Blue has had Enough of people and bails, leaving John to head home alone

theres a sort of mirror-development going on with the five of em. Red, John, and Amy would all like everyone to get along, though theyre a bit tentative about it (John moreso than the other two, actually, jsut cause. well Red n Blue could still be Sauce Monsters). Dave and Blue on the other hand do Not like people enough for this shit, and Dave's not unconvinced theyre Sauce Monsters. he will not trust them until proven he should

the story's kinda nebulous but i got an idea for some Shit going down that involves both Sauce Monsters and also the Higher-Ups to have some fuckin absolute chaos go down.

Oops! All Trans

Everybody is transgender. Everyone

Ive actually workshopped this one both with ben (catgirlrepublic) and ghost (ghost-wannabe) lmao its a fun lil concept ive had from the get-go cause i mean. What’s an internet tran gonna do other than hit all their favourite media with the Everyone’s Trans beam

Dave transitioned post-high school and faked his death for it. People go missing in Undisclosed all the damned time, after all. He moved to the next city over, transitioned fully, then came back as a completely new man. Yes i know this doesnt exactly fit with the “everyone knows David from high school” thing alright, hush.

Anytime anyone brings up John’s old best friend (pre-transition Dave) John throws an entire fit like an overdramatic grieving widow. Full-on sobbing “why would you bring her up?! I miss her so much—” to the point that people just stop bringing up because Jesus Christ That Sure Is Uncomfortable KJHGFDS.

This is a scheme he and Dave came up with prior to Dave leaving, though Dave hadnt exactly anticipated John putting on this much of a performance about it— but it’s stopped Dave from ever having tto hear his deadname again, so hey.

Amy transitioned sometime in middle school/early high school. Her family was super supportive and loved her a ton and most people just know her as Amy. she was super shy her whole life really so. Yeah. people just dont think to bring it up lmao also i Feel Like big jim would absolutely wallop anyone who gave her trouble of any kind

John’s nonbinary (genderfluid specifically) and not exactly Interested in transitioning ? like hes fine with how he is. mostly.

he came out to Dave in high school but hes not out to anyone else exactly. Maybe his bandmates. Probably any other trans person in Undisclosed knows, too, cause theyre safe to tell lmao. Johns mostly a “he/him out of convenience” kinda nb who’s cool with any pronouns but does prefer they/them most. Dave and Amy use they/them when the trio are alone

Also this is a totally self-indulgent caveat that i think would be great, Dave’s actually agender but because he's transmasc and transitioned when he thought there were really only two options, and being Boy at least felt less weird than being Girl, he just kind of assumed he was a dude. It’s only through a lot of (like fucking years and years hes probably in his 30s/40s when he puts 2 and 2 together on this one) talks about gender with John that he realizes he actually feels like No Gender. Masc aesthetic with none gender.

I Just Think It’d Be Neat Is All Okay

Also Amy came out to Dave about being trans early on in them seeing each other and his response was to get very nervous before blurting out “me too” and then just being too embarrassed to talk about it for the rest of the day. Hes got a lot of hangups on talking about it actually it takes years for him to get comfortable in that

by contrast when Amy comes out to John about it his response is to yell “EYYY ME TOO” and give her a big ol hug lmao

I think itd be neatt if Amy ran a like. Transfem help/advice blog on tumblr. Kind of helped-with by John who can give her transfem nb insight for certain asks. I also just think that would be neat.

Cowboy AU - i put this one last cause its got drawings to it actually. Theyll be at the bottom

Basically just. Hey you ever watched a western. I think they look neat

This is another one me n ben have come up with lol

The soy sauce and all that shit still exist, im not sure where korrok fits in yet but ill figure it out

Theres no real like solid narrative yet ? but heres the barebones of everybody’s arcs.

John

Johns an absolute troublemaker, Of Course. Hes wanted in several towns for absolutely stupid shit. Hes a loner who shows up, causes chaos, gets drunk, does some drugs, runs away if people get too mad at him

He definitely had the same kind of deal with the soy sauce as in canon— he was at some kind of party, somebody offered it, he took it cause why the fuck wouldnt he, now he can see monsters and shit

Hes kind of a mooch also. Like. dont let him stay in your barn man he’ll never fucking leave and drink all your booze.

He runs into Dave when they happen to just, cross paths in the same town. the bullshit John stirs up ends up involving Dave in a way that makes it seem like it's his fault too, and they both get run out of town

after that he just tags along after Dave. hes decided this guy's Cool he wants to stick around. Dave is pissed at first, but not enough to shoot him or anything, and eventually, John grows on him

Dave

Dave also is a loner but unlike John hes simply so fucking awkward and bad with people. He doesnt feel like he belongs anywhere so he just travels

He’s the stereotypical Lone Ranger tbh. He wanders from town to town, solving their problems, though hed deny its out of any moral obligation (it kinda is, a little bit, tbh. He does like feeling useful). He shows up, fixes things, leaves. He's kind of a legend but most people think he's hiding something dark. other people jsut know him as that guy who farted real loud in the middle of the saloon and promptly skipped town out of sheer embarrassment. you know how it goes with Dave

He ends up involved with the Soy Sauce when a snake (not Actually a snake,) bites him. The snake’s more like the wig-monsters, really. Anyway, it injects him with the soy sauce, he fucking trips balls in the middle of the desert, he can see monsters now

He runs into John and shit goes tits-up, as said, but they become traveling buddies after that. he'd never say so, but he's glad for the company, actually. it's nice. hes not used to companionship but he feels a strange kind of easiness hanging out with John....

not sure how the Monster Dave concept will like fit in to this reality but like. trust me i want it in here. I'll Figure It Out.

Amy

Amy’s been living in a town John and Dave end up passing through and she is very curious about these two new Handsome Strangers who claim to fight monsters and just kinda. Persistently tags along til they let her join for real

Her family’s all dead, unfortunately, just like in canon, and she’s been living alone for a few years before meeting John n Dave. she had nothing left in that town to stay for, she'd been fantasizing about escaping on wild adventures for a long time and this felt a little like a dream come true. (Dave still gives her a spiel about how Difficult it is, but really, her fantasies were pretty grounded-in-reality already. i jsut think thats how she is, yknow?)

Shes the first person to react to the whole “we see monsters” shit with a kind of “oh, okay. neat” kind of response lmao

John and Dave fix whatever the fuck is up with her town (maybe that’s where the Korrok shit can fit, who knows) and Amy ends up being integral to that. After, she insists they take her with them because “they need her now” and Dave just cant really say no. John too is very much "the more the merrier!" and hes actually glad to have another person along he loves people lmao

At the start she has long hair but after she joins them she chops it short with a knife for convenience

also she still is an amputee. justt. idk. it was a wagon/stagecoach accident rather than a car accident lmao. just to clarify since i hadnt mentioned it, i wouldnt rob her of her ghost hand or yknow. all of the significance to her character that Missing A Hand has. although also now im going to have to research what was used as painkillers way-back-when, but im betting shes still got, like, her pain pills, they probably had those, maybe i wouldnt have to try too hard there. old timey medicine could be WACK though,

Shitload

Yeah hes in tthis shit mostly cause i liked designing his cowboy self lmao

Hes a kid (like 16, 17, technically i think in those days that was more Young Man than Kid but whatever. Hes Young i mean.) who got possessed by the Worms out in the desert and, by his family’s perception, just went missing!

Hes also a wanderer, but he ended up at the same town john and dave met in, at that same time, and starts following them after, already aware of who/what they are.

He keeps his face covered 24/7. actually he covers a Majority of his self for reasons. kinda want him to be a slightly more horrifying Worm Entity rather than human idk,

I kinda dont have much for this boy yet sorry Shitload

images !

with some editing notes for me cause im doing a very specific aesthetic with this lmao. i might change some lil details/colours though ...... idk

im also kinda 🤔 about shitload's colour palette. i want things assoicated w the sauce to be black'n'red predominantly but i think his palette might mirror dave's too closely. also im working on a korrok design i jsut am too busy to draw it now

hi im currently dying because of my period so i just wanna know how the main 6 act when mc gets their period and specifically cramps cause id really like for someone to help me feel less awful right now, anyways thank you!

Aghhhn I know I said I was gonna wait to write more tomorrow, and I still haven’t wrote the upright ending one, but this one feels like and emergency, because honestly I know how you feel (my cramps were once so bad I passed out In class, so I know how you’re feeling 100% and if you ever want to talk or need anything my dms and asks are always open!) I hope this makes you feel better!

Main six when Mc gets their period

Asra

Exotic chocolate . That’s it that’s the headcanon. Also chocolate has stuff in it that’s supposed to leesen your cramps (I forget what but I know it’s in there) so he sticks up on a ton of it just for moments like these.

Will massage you whoever it hurts if you need him too, and he gives the best massages (next to Muriel) plus his hands can heat up from his ✨Magick✨ which makes it ten times better. Speaking of his hands heating up, he’ll warm up his hands and place it where it hurts, but if you don’t like being touched then He’ll heat up a rag instead (he also has the vesuvian equivalent of this)

Won’t let you leave the bed, faust watches over you just too be sure, he can run the shop, do the chores, cook clean, hell, he even starts to call himself you’re house wife, because he’s doing everything! But don’t worry, he says it nuzzling his head in your neck, pampering you with kisses, he doesn’t mind.

(Also you and Afab asra are synced up, and neither of you get shit done that whole week)

Nadia

Dude, she got the whole palace staff doating on you in a matter of minutes, you’re not going to have to lift a finger for the next week. She also makes sure you have all the goods, expensive wine, expensive chocolate, expensive comfy pajamas, what ever else you need.

If your cramps start to get too bad, she’ll call in a doctor (probably Julian) to check in on you, she’s had her fair share of bad cramps, she just wants to make sure there’s not any underlying problems, just in case.

She’ll run you as many warm baths as you need, taking her time washing you, massaging where it hurts, and feeding you chocolate, she just wants you to feel better, it hurts her seeing you like this. She’ll also hire a masseuse if you’d like one, and she keeps warm rags on where it hurts all day.

Julian

Now, mans is a doctor, he knows a thing or two, but uh,,,,,,,oh god are they supposed to be that painful? He’s the type of dude who doesn’t understand why dudes complain about having it worst when not only woman have birth which is extremely painful, but they also get their period once a month, which they can’t even control plus, it’s just as painful. That being said if will fight some one if they start saying shit like that, just saying.

If it’s bad bad, then he’ll stay home from work and look after you, just too make sure you’re okay, he can’t take a week off of work every month though, so choose carefully, but he will try to come home as early as he can. And he is the most doating out of the main six, so if you want it baby you got it,

He’s also the most down for period sex because orgasms help relevie stress and because, let’s be honest, he’s done worst. (Stolen from @lisa-frank-cave who’s written two(?) headcanons about periods, and a modern au one(which was really good)was posted very recently so it shouldn’t take long to find!)

Portia

Oof she’s been there, she’s already getting the ice cream, and is about to leave to pick up some soup from mazelinka which helps with the cramps, you’re not aloud to move until she gets back, and if you do there will be consequences.

Pepi is like the heating pad you didn’t know you needed, she’s perfect, she’s nice warm, soft, and she’ll just lay where ever you put her. Plus if you need to do something with your hands to keep your mind off the pain, you can just pet her, and tell her how cute she is. (You can also do the same thing with Portia)

Portia will also try to take your mind off of it, but pay telling you funny stories, or making out, or teaching you how too knit or sew, or giving you the strap, or braiding your hair,, ya know cute couple things. :)

Muriel

Muriel sure as hell isnt cluless, he knows what a period is, but he didn’t know they hurt this much,,, and it makes him sad,,, so when I tell you he’s going to do anything In his power to make you feel better, I mean it baby, he’s got you covered.

He’s warm like all the time, he just runs hot, (which makes sense because he is hot) so he’ll just place his hands where your cramps are and hold you, or even give you a little massage if you need one, and covers you in furs, anything to make you feel better.

He👏will👏sing👏too👏you👏 is it good? I mean it’s not too bad, but it’s cute because he’s trying! He sings in like a super soft voice and runs his free hand through you hair while his other arm is wrapped around your waist and his hand is resting where it hurts while you drink magick tea that’s supposed to make your cramps get better and it’s just 😤😤😤 so perfect.

Lucio

Like Muriel, he’s not clueless, nor is grossed out, he’s not ashamed of it at all actually, and if you bleed through his sheets he does everything in his power to make you smile again and tries to reassure you that their just sheets and they can be replaced, but you can’t

He has doctors and servants doating on you 24/7, and promises you he’s hurting too. A wise man once said “its uterUS babe” and lucio lives by that rule. He also lives by the rule of “ if babes on her period, then I’m on my period.” Like the whole palace hates him when your on your period because he’s more obnoxious than usual!

He’ll drown you in cool gadgets that are supposed to make you feel better, and press pressure into where the pain is, all while holding a warm rag to the spot to make you feel better, and safe. He’ll also give you lots of kisses to make you feel better, sure it doesn’t help, but don’t tell lucio that.

Ahhhh, I tried to write this as fast as I can, so I could get it too you as quick as possible because dude I know your hurting and I’m so sorry. I hope this makes you feel better. Also again: @lisa-frank-cave has some really good period content on their page (we’ll content in general but you might like their period content in this hard time) I hope you feel better soon! (Also again if you ever need everything my dms and asks are always open! And I’m always willing to write something short if you just specify! ❤️)

Fluffy clingy!Sir Pentious x reader headcanons? he’s,,,babey

Skfjskfjsj you know Im a major slut for Sir Pent being baby

Gender Neutral uwu

He always wants ATTENTION

ATTENTION ON HIM AT ALL TIMES

ESPECIALLY FROM YOU

He will literally be so extra and use his evil supervillain voice indoors just so you’ll pay attention to him.

Like you’ll just be sitting on the couch in your living quarters and he’ll be announcing things to you and you’ll just be like *clap clap clap* fuck yeahhhh!! Amen!!!! You’re gonna be the best overlord ever babe!!!!

Once he’s fully content with that he’ll expect you to shower him with compliments

Which of COURSE you enjoy doing, because he tries to act all smug and then he just ends up getting flustered

“You’re so great, you’re amazing, you’re such a great boyfriend and I’m so proud of you, you’re gonna do great things and I can’t wait to watch you do them- you’re so handsome-“

“SKFJSKJFKSFBKSJDKS *SIR PENTIOUS NOISES*”

Tries to act like a dom, is a sub

Such a sub

He can’t help his subbiness

Not in a sexual way but like pffft he’s so sub

Speaking of sexual, he’s really self conscious of his,,,, snake anatomy down there

His tail? He’s proud of that! His snake coochie? Not so much

But you constantly tell him you love it

We love snake coochie!!!111

He likes to pretend that he’s not that big on cuddling but oh yeah

He’s at his weakest when he’s emotional or tired.

He’s just lost a battle? Time to curl up in your lap

Sleepy? Time to lay on you and wrap his entire lower body around your legs

Also, he sucks on the tip of his tail like a baby it’s really cute

Don’t call him cute though

Hes m a n l y

Sometimes if you’ve got him appeased enough he’ll suck on YOUR thumb

You’re the only one who’s allowed to wear his hat

His hat loves you btw, full of smiles whenever you approach it

The eggbois also love you and crowd around you whenever you get home- they always wanna be picked up like a bunch of kids

Pent really fucking loves curry

So much that you learned a ton of recipes for him

Cause you don’t trust him in the kitchen

Once he accidentally closed the oven on his entire lower body, and all you heard was a scream from the kitchen

Yeah, tending to those wounds wasn’t fun

To be honest, it’s only on rare occasions that he actually gives you obvious love back. By obvious I mean like, he doesn’t shower you with compliments or tells you that he appreciates you

But he scatters little rare compliments here and there, and only at certain times. You know they mean a lot.

He’s just kinda bad at voicing his feelings, his actions mean so much more

But you know it’s mutual. After all, he doesn’t abuse you like the eggbois and he doesn’t treat you any less than an equal

He’ll do anything to protect you tbh, if it came to it, he’d value your life over his

He’s saved your life a few times

He’s so clingy omg he’ll call you up on his little walkie talkie from the other room- cause you both of course have walkie talkies

He’ll try not to make it obvious that he just wants your company

“Hullo my dear- over”

“Hey Pent, whats up? Over”

“Come to the garage- over”

You’ll come in and he’ll be working on some big metal project, and you’ll just wrap your arms around his waist from behind and part his hair to kiss his neck. Cause you know that’s EXACTLY what he wants.

He’s not very big on starting things, like he won’t kiss you first. But you can always tell he wants to. You have to initiate everything

If he ever does intitiate anything first, big if, he’ll try to be really dom but he just fuckin subs out after a few seconds

You can read him like a book tbh

Anywho

Sometimes when he’s overwhelmed, especially after a failed battle, he pushes out the bed away from the wall, curls up in a big mess of snake coils between the wall and the bed, and just lays there unmoving for a bit, his entire upper body and head hidden under his lower body like a ball python

You and the eggbois have a planned protocol for this occasion, because it happens a lot (Pent’s kind of a failure lol don’t tell him that tho)

It goes Tea ➡️ Cuddles ➡️ Encouragement

After a good ten minutes of him being curled up alone, enough to have him calm down a bit, you’ll bring him some herbal tea and gently offer it to him before petting his hair and giving him a shit ton of encouragement, meanwhile the egg bois crowd around and also babble about how great he did and how he’ll get Cherri Bomb next time for good

There’s a lot of angry crying and venting

Though that usually does the trick and he’s back to being himself

Anyways

He loves kissing

A lot

I also Headcanon that he has a little snoot-

His snoot is cute and it squishes when you boop him

And so is his little tongue, especially when he runs it against your bottom lip

He’ll never admit it but he loves being taken care of

Just,,,, hold this snake man tight

Especially around the waist, he loves it when your hands are on his waist

Or on his hips

God he’s so thick

Why did Viv fucking make the snake so goddamn slim thICK

When he’s flustered he giggles a lot

Like if you pull him close to you by the waist he’ll giggle uncontrollably and say “oh my~“ or whatever Victorian people fucking say idfk

You constantly tease him about his snake lisp and that makes him a little angry, but it’s kinda funny when he gets angry about it cause the lisp gets worSE

“SSSSSSHUT THUP”

“Okay Sir Poridge”

“I-“

You always call him by the wrong name just to cheese him

Anywho

He may be smart but he’s a big dumb bitch

Bunch of big dumb bitches under the same roof

Two big dumb significant others, a hat with teeth, and some eggs. That sounds like a perfect little family

Shut Up And Kiss Me [11/?]

Pairing: Tom Hiddleston x reader

Style: Multichapter

WC: 2k

Warnings: mention of blackout, exstreme awkwardness, 

Summary: You and Professor Hiddleston have been colleagues for many years now, and through those years the hatred for each other has only grown. Now, as a new school year starts, you’re being told that you have to share a classroom or a class. Neither are happy about the outcome, but knowing you’ll never come to an agreement, you let the class choose for you. Team-teaching is rare in 2019, but it is a lot harder to do when you can’t stand the person you’re doing it with. 

A/N: aaaa, i have been so absent, I know. This has taken forever, but now I can promise you I’m gonna be back. Not only will this, hopefully be updated more often (I have inspiration), but I also got like a ton of writing mojo (wrote 4k words yesterday) and a Loki!Piarate au is soon done and i have other shits, my requests are becoming easier though turns out they’re getting long. Anyways, I hope this can please you and I hope to be able to post more in the coming time. I love you all so much ^_^ P.S. it’s close to christmas and a christmas party... ;)

Previous | Seires Masterlist | Part Twelve

You can’t place the feeling. Not really. All you know is that something feels… off. Wrong. 

It’s Sunday, three days since halloween and you met Emma’s friends. Even though that was fun and all, the night could have been better had you stuck with the people you know. Not only would you be able to continue to get Tom being nice (which had your heart race a mile a minute), but you could also, maybe, have more fun seeing as you wouldn’t panic everytime you said something. 

However, three days later, something feels off. You’re not even sure if it has anything to do with Halloween (if it has anything to do with Tom lending you his coat because you were barely dressed in your costume),  or if it has something to do with the fact that you have no recollection of what you did last night. 

All you know is that something is not as it should be. 

You try to shake off the feeling and reach for your phone, where it lies on your nightstand. The clock on it reads 07.39 AM and you curse your annoying drunk self for always making sure you wake up early―it’s not that you go to bed early, no rather late actually (like you gotta stay up ‘til at least 3 AM), but more that whenever you do get drunk, you actually fall asleep right away and you actually sleep. Maybe that’s the cure. 

Despite wanting to continue your slumber, you decide to get up. Maybe you can figure out what’s giving you this feeling of something being amiss. 

One slightly wrong, though not that surprising, thing lies on your couch. Y/BFF/N has their face half planted in one of your pillows, though the angle works for them to breathe. One arm hangs loosely off the couch and their legs have tangled themselves in a blanket, where one is thrown over the back of the couch. You have no idea how that can be comfortable, and you bet they’ll tell you how much they regret it when they wake up. 

Yet, you know that’s not the feeling that haunts you. Seeing your best friend crashing on your couch is not a rare sight, though it is becoming rarer as time passes. 

Nothing is amiss in your apartment. Everything where you left it when you went out last night, even the now half-full bottle of wine you opened before leaving that sits on your countertop. 

The mystery continues, but the answers are not in your apartment. One thing’s for sure, you’re not about to go out and find out. 

Before you decide to check any messages or notifications, you find a glass, fill it with water and down it in seconds. Pulling your head back you become aware of the ache in it, and with the water helping you clear your mind a little, the pounding slowly creeps into a loud drum. 

Okay, so you’re not getting away from being hungover. Good to know. 

Not being able to focus with the drums really taking off in your head, you rush to the bathroom and find aspirin. You take two and swallow them with another glass of water. It’s gonna take a little while before they help so you slide down the bathroom wall and sit there to let yourself ease into the beating that keeps interrupting your thoughts. 

It feels like it takes forever, but when you check the clock, the pounding starts to wind down a little after more or less fifteen minutes. You don’t have the energy to get up from the warmth of the bathroom floor, so you continue to sit as you open your phone. 

You have three snaps, five messenger texts, two texts and eleven missed phone calls. The phonecalls belong to three people; three from Tom (your heart skips a beat at the thought that he thinks of you), six from Benedict, and surprisingly, two from Chris. 

The two texts are one message of having voicemails (three), and one message from Tom; I heard from Benedict. He’s worried, are you okay? - Tom. You ignore it, making a note to reply and listen to the voicemails after checking messenger and snap. 

It takes three seconds to regret checking snap. Two of the snaps are from people you have no idea who are, but who you probably added last night. The last one is a video of you from Y/BFF/N embarrassing yourself to the nth degree on the dance floor. You know they saved it, and you know there is no point in asking to delete it―no matter what, you know they won’t post it anywhere. 

In a state of shock, checking messenger becomes more automated that anything else. You read the messages; one with a similar name to one of the snap usernames that you ignore and delete the friend request seeing as the message itself is not one you want; one that’s from a groupchat with you, Y/BFF/N and another mutual friend that you don’t see that often as they live abroad, but whom you trust fully and therefore has replied to your drunk texts about wanting to fuck a certain person whose name shall not be mentioned; three texts from Chris asking what’s going on, if you’re okay and if there’s anything he can do to help. You only reply to Chris’s by asking why he wonders, saying yes and asking him if he knows anything about what happened last night―you do not admit to having no memory of the evening. 

Waiting for a reply you listen to the voicemails. All three are from Benedict; one he sounds mad in, one he sounds worried in, and one he threatens to call the police and tell them that you’re missing and that you might be in danger―it feels a little weird not knowing if that actually happened. 

You sigh, blowing your hair so it falls in your face. Well, well, gotta keep searching. 

In the living room, Y/BFF/N lies in the same position as before. You ignore them, instead focusing on the low rumble from your stomach. 

Hopefully, some food will help clear the mystery. 

The food itself doesn’t help. However, the replies from Chris does. 

Chris: asking because you seemed very drunk and i wanted to know you’re okay, good that you are, and no, i don’t know since you never really gave me anything to go on

You: okay, well, there are no other messages between us, anything I did to alert you??

Chris: uhh, no, actually it was Tom that called me

You: Tom?? Hiddleston?? The dude who I teach with?? 

Chris: yeah… i was surprised too, maybe talk to him?

You: yeah, im gonna 

Of course, that’s what you tell Chris. You know, with every ounce of your body, that you will not pick up the phone and either text or call him because you know that that would be the death of you. 

You will wait, as long as you can, to ask Tom why he called Chris. The thought of it alone just has that feeling of wrongness expand. You shake it off, put away your phone and return your attention to your food. 

 --

Going into work on Monday is not on your list of fun activities, but it is something you have to do. You suppose it would have been on your list of fun if not for the looming conversation you need to have with a certain professor. 

It takes little time after your first class to meet him. Usually, your schedules don’t coincide but you guess the universe isn’t on your side today. 

“Hi.” Tom purses his lips and puts his hands in his pockets. 

You nod. “Hi.”

“How was your weekend?” he asks. 

“It was good,” you say and nod. “You know what, I can’t really talk right now. Catch you later?” You shoot him a pained smile and hurry away before Tom can answer. There is no way you’ve ever been in a more awkward situation (and the worst part is that you don’t even know what it is that made it awkward―what the fuck did you say?!). 

You try not to think too hard about it as you make your way back to your office. With two hours of office time, you can get back to focusing on your research project and get your mind off Saturday night and your possibly very embarrassing utterance to Tom. 

God, what the fuck did you say?

It takes a solid five minutes for your mind to rush back to what’s been circling around the last twenty-four hours. 

“Okay, you know what?” you say out loud to the silence of your office. It does not reply back. However, in the need to say it out loud, you act as if it did. “I have to just ask. I’m gonna go to wherever he currently is and I’m gonna ask what I said and I’m gonna cut right to the chase and it’s gonna be alright. It’s gonna be okay. It’s probably not as bad as I think it is.” 

However, you don’t get up. It’s like you’re glued to your chair and no matter how much the nerves in your brain tells your legs to get up, they don’t move. 

For two hours, you just sit there. Almost so you’re late to class even. 

 --

“We’re doing a what?” 

Both you and Tom frown at Dean McHallan who, though with a slight roll of his eyes, nods. “You’re going to a conference in Scotland. I know it’s sudden and it seems weird, but they specifically asked for you two to speak.”

You raise a brow. “They asked for us to speak about what exactly? Do I have to prepare some kind of presentation or something now because, honestly, I’m not ready for that.” 

“They asked for you both to speak on team-teaching creative writing. They wanted input from your students as well so during the week now, ask them some questions that you can quote them on. And they wanted you, Y/N, to speak on your research project as they find it interesting and they weirdly enough hadn’t thought about it before. They would love to hear how you’re going about it.” 

Your mind races as you nod along to his words. What are you supposed to do? Say no, nope, you can’t do that. You literally have no choice because he’s already said you’re going and McHallan makes the final decisions and he also knows neither of you really have anything that important going on currently. 

“Okay, I guess we’re going to Scotland next week.” You’ve always wanted to go so maybe it’s an opportunity you should take anyway. 

“It’s settled then. Tom?”

The literature professor nods. “I can’t argue with your reasoning so I guess we’re going. I have some inquiries. Accomodations? Travel? Food? And when?”

McHallan hands each of you a piece of paper. “You will be in the same hotel, though different rooms. I think they’ll be just across from each other or something. You’ll fly there on wednesday morning, together, and have all wednesday evening to settle in and make the last preparations and so on. Food will be accounted for unless you eat above budget. There are breakfast and dinner included at the hotel, and lunch is served with the conference. If you eat anything outside of that it will be out of your own pocket. The schedule for the conference is on the back of that paper and the information you need about your flights just under there.”

You nod, going over the paper as McHallan talks and making different mental notes. Some of those make no sense, and one of them is ‘get trapped somewhere so you have to ask Tom what you did on Saturday’, though you’re afraid that one might be the hardest one to see through with.

It’s Vegas, Baby - Chapter II

Summary: Nesta goes out to the store and so does Cassian. Classic Nesta, she thinks he’s stalking her. Trust me it’s more interesting than it sounds lol(I hope)

Word Count: 2k

A/N: I'm back on my grind yall *sunglasses emoji*

Nicknames:

Feyby- Feyre(its supposed to be like feyre and baby put together cause shes the baby of the family)

Nestella- Nesta(its supposed to be nesta and nutella. u will learn more later;)

Tiny Ancient One- Amren(kinda self explanatory)

Mor Boobiez Plz- Mor(idk i just thought it was funny lol)

"I'm home!" Nesta calls out to Feyre. She can smell pizza and instantly strides towards the kitchen, where she finds Feyre with a large cheese pizza still in the box, half-eaten.

"Finally! I was beginning to wonder if you and Cassian finally acknowledged the sexual tension between yourselves and fucked."

"Feyre! That is not appropriate to say at all! Cassian and I are barely colleagues, we will never be anything so stop with your meddling!" Nesta replied, trying to will down a bright red blush. Feyre and her boyfriend, Rhys, had this insane idea that she and Cassian were made for each other, it didn't help that Cassian was constantly flirting with her either.

"We're back!" Mor and Amren had just gotten home from some party, with Mor holding Duchess, their shared Chinese Crested Dog. When the four of them bought a penthouse together Feyre and Mor wanted a dog, and Nesta and Amren didn't. After begging and pleading with her sister and friend to please give him away after they adopted him they finally decided to just lock her, Amren, and Duchess in a room together. They all became friends, and they found out that Duchess was, in fact, a boy. They had been calling him Duchess for too long, though, so when they called him Duke he wouldn't reply so the name just stuck. When the rest of their inner circle found out-"the rest" being Cassian, Azriel, and Rhys- they didn't stop teasing them for days. In their defense, he had a very small you-know-what and he was a very ladylike boy.

"Bring my baby boy to me! Oh I wove you so much you wittle cutie pie!" Feyre was letting Duchess lick her face, making Nesta gag. Sure she loved the dog, but seriously, he licks his butt.

"Ugh, Mor, your cousin is working me to the bone! And he won't stop trying to push me and Cassian together! He thinks he can push us together just cause we “have hella sexual tension”! Also, I was thinking about this last night, Rhys is dating Feyre and if I'm Feyres sister and he's Cassians brother, that's literally incest!"

"You know they aren't actually brothers, right? They're just best friends." Mor replied, trying not to laugh at Nesta's flustered expression. She put down Duchess and reached for a slice of pizza. Everyone knew that it was just a matter of time before Nesta and Cassian got together. Nesta and Mor were the only single people in the house, not including Duchess. And Mor was just recently dumped so she was in a big love life meddling mood. Amren was dating some guy named Varian, and Feyre... Well, let's just say that it's a miracle that she's here right now and not out getting nailed by Rhys.

"I know that, but still. They refer to themselves as brothers."  

"So you're saying that if they didn't call themselves brothers you would have sex with Cassian! I knew it!"

"No, Feyre, I am not saying that! Besides, he flirts with everyone so even if I was into him- which I am not - we probably wouldn't become a thing."

"Keyword being probably." Mor says with a smirk.

"Enough of all this bickering, I'm hungry and bored so someone turn on the T.V. while I make some popcorn." Amren quickly breaks them up before Nesta tears off someone's head.

~~~~~

Cassian pulled up at the townhouse he shared with his brothers. All the lights were turned off which meant that Az was sleeping, or not home. The former was more likely because Az usually got pizza on his rest nights and there were three cold slices of meat lovers pizza left. Cassian was so hungry, he ended up eating them cold. He fought back a moan at how delicious the pizza was. He would never understand how Nesta was able to be a vegetarian. Shit. He had been such a dick to Nesta earlier. She was genuinely concerned about him and he had just pushed her away.

Cassian pulled out his phone and checked instagram. Mor had posted a photo of her and Amren with their dog, Duchess, at a party. He didn’t know if he should laugh or cry at the fact that a misgendered dog had a better social life than he did.

~~~~~

“Ugh, Feyre, Tomas and his little gang showed up at work last night.” Nesta and Feyre were chilling in the kitchen, the latter making a breakfast spread that would put Disney Channel moms to shame. Amren and Mor were nursing killer hangovers, so Feyre made sure to bang around a ton in the kitchen.

“Again? A-fucking-gain? Nuthin new, nuthin changed? Same old shit. Same old fuckin shit.” Feyre replied, forgetting that Nesta had no idea what that reference meant.

“I told them to leave and that I almost had the money to pay them back, but Tomas just slapped my ass and said ‘sEe YoU oN yOuR nExT sHiFt’ then he got up and left.”

“You do realize that we could end all of this by just telling Rhys? I know you have this whole thing about your pride and shit, but we could tell Rhys and he could pay off all your debts to him.”

“Feyre, I appreciate it, but I need to fight my own battles. I got myself into this mess, so I sure as hell can get myself out of it. Plus, I don’t like the idea of feeling like I owe my current employer money.”

“Nesta, sweetie, I love you… BUT YOU NEED TO PUT YOUR DAMN PRIDE TO THE SIDE FOR LIKE, TWO SECONDS AND ACCEPT HELP!”

“FEYRE-”

“Okay, can we yell about Nesta's issues at some time other than 6am? Also, is that bacon I smell?” Mor walked in holding her head and wearing one of Nesta's sweatshirts with some leggings.

“Yes, fattie. And it’s like, 10:30.” Feyre slapped Mor's hand away from a stack of pancakes cooling on the countertop.

“And I do not have any issues, Mor. I’m not the one that went partying with a dog last night.”

“Nesta, that is exactly the reason why you have issues. If you went partying with Duchess, maybe you would loosen up a bit. God knows you need it.”

“Brat.” Nesta threw a piece of toast at Mor's head.

“Thanks! Hey, Feyre, pass the butter.” Feyre slid the butter across the counter and cursed loudly when it just slid on the floor at Mor's feet. Facedown.

“Really, Feyre?” Nesta said in an exasperated tone.

“I’m sorry! I thought she would catch it!”

“That was our last stick of butter, you absolute dingbat!” Nesta sighed and picked up the keys to her car.

“Where are you going?” Mor asked, ever the worried friend thinking she had caused a family feud.

“To the store. We need more milk and eggs anyways. Tell me if you guys are gonna go out while I’m gone.” Nesta walked out the door of their spacious apartment and made her way over to the elevator, pressing the ground level button. She stormed over to her car, got in, and slammed the door shut. On her way to the store, she noticed that one of the local book stores was having a sale. She tried to ignore the voice in her head telling her that she had piles of unread books in her room, and all over the other communal areas of the apartment. She would just pop in after picking up the groceries. No big deal. She could restrain herself. Maybe.

~~~~    

Cassian woke up and made his way down the stairs towards the kitchen at 10am.

Hey sorry don’t be mad but here’s the shopping list. I had to go out.

~Azriel

“Unbelievable.” Cassian sighed and picked up the piece of paper attached to Azriel's little note and crumpled it up. Then he uncrumpled it because he remembered he needed to see what it said. Cassian walked up to his room and threw on a sweatshirt, some slip-on vans, and grabbed his keys. He couldn’t remember why they decided to share groceries. He wanted to in the beginning, but now that he woke up without any food in the house because his brothers had eaten all of it he was thinking or re-evaluating that decision. Cassian slid into his car and made his way to the store.

~~~~

When Nesta pulled up at the store she checked her phone and saw that Feyre had sent her a text while she was driving.

Feyby*: heyyyyyyyyy nes can you pleeeeeeeeeease get me some chocolate while you’re out :)?

Nestella*: k. anything else? im walking in now by the way

Feyby: nope! thank you love you! :)

Nestella: love you too

Nesta made her way towards the dairy aisle and picked up some 2% milk, a pack of four sticks of butter, and eggs. She quickly walked over to the candy aisle and began studying all her options, she took candy selecting very seriously.

“Nes?”

~~~~

Cassian walked into the store and quickly picked up all the stuff on the list. Once he got to the last few items written he realized he wanted ice-cream for a movie night with the boys. He walked over to the dairy aisle and picked up a tub of cookies n’ cream right when Nesta Archeron stormed past him towards the candy aisle. He followed her because, well, he wanted to talk to her. But he needed to act like he wasn't stalking her cause she might yell at him.

“Nes?”

“Mother Above, Cassian! You scared the shit out of me don’t you dare do that ever again!”

Oh well.

“How did you not hear me coming? Are you really that focused on chocolate?”

“I’m selecting some chocolate for Feyre, and she is very picky so I was focused on reading what the ingredients were in each bar.” She seemed to have recovered from the scare because she just grabbed a random chocolate bar and stormed past him.

“Obviously you don’t care that much if you’re willing to just grab a random bar and walk away!” Cassian yelled at Nesta. Some other shoppers began to stare at him so he quickly said “Don’t worry, we work together. I know her, I’m not some random creep haha.” That just got him more strange looks though so he just made his way towards self-checkout and paid for the items and skirted outta there.

~~~~

Nesta was so embarrassed while walking away from Cassian. People were staring at her! Ugh, Cassian needs to learn to not yell in public places. She walked over to her car after checking out and loaded her groceries into the boot. She needed a black iced coffee stat. Nesta began the quick drive to one of the local coffee shops and once she arrived she quickly sent the girls a text letting them know where she was.

Nestella: hey bitches im getting coffee you hoes want anything

Feyby: i want a mocha frappe pleeease              

Tiny Ancient One*: just get me a black americano girl

Mor Boobiez Plz*: i wanna iced coffee with whipped cream and caramel

Nestella: okay for everyone except Mor cause wtf that's not even an item on the menu

Mor Boobiez Plz: it is i swear! just ask them for it they did it when i asked!

Nestella: fine

“What can I get for you?” The guy working the register asked in a very monotone voice.

“One black iced coffee, one black americano, one mocha frappe, and one iced coffee with whipped cream and caramel sauce.”

“We don’t do that last one-” Nesta gave him a withering glare and he immediately changed his mind on what he was about to say.

“Those will be ready soon ma’am. Can I get a name for the order?”

“Nesta. Thank you.” Nesta walked over to the opposite side of the counter to wait while their coffee was being prepared.

“That was quite impressive the way you scared him into doing what you wanted him to, Sweetheart.”

“Cassian! Are you stalking me? Go away.”

“I’m not stalking you, I’m just here to get some coffee.” He smirked at her and picked up a latte that was set down beside him. He took a sip and looked Nesta up and down before smirking and saying “Hot.” he winked at her and left before she could yell at him. If he was being honest the coffee was actually the perfect temperature, but he just loved getting under Nesta Archerons skin.    

The scarlatinas are a big family with aunts and cousins visiting a lot right? Have you got an idea of how their house looks? (also could you release the Scarlatina family descriptions you gave me to the public?)

well, really the scarlatina family isn’t big in the, uh, family tree sense; it’s not like Velvet has 100+ cousins and that sort of stuff, but they’re big in the sense that they all live together, hjdshkjfsd. so it’s a big household! sixteen people! it’s nothing to sniff at! so the aunts and cousins dont visit, really, because they literally live next door, lmao.

the scarlatina homestead is split into two houses that keep getting added to every once in a while. the bigger one (aka the first) has georgette, rajah, taffeta, ash, chiffon, velvet, satin and hickory live there, whilst the second (rapidly growing) house has cotton, tenné, hawthorn (+ hawthorn’s wife, saffron, and their kid, fir), ramie (+ her wife, auburn) and birch. that said, the houses pretty much act as one, and people tend to drift in and out of either of em at will.

the houses are similar in terms of their footprint, since they sorta both evolved abt the same time for the same needs (oh shit a kid oh shit a marriage oh shit ANOTHER kid), and save for two smaller second storeys for storage/spare room needs, almost the entire thing is on the ground floor (heat rises, baby). they share a big old shed/workshop which ash lingers in CONSTANTLY, as well as two little gardens where they grow their own produce. they also have some solar panels and a huge windmill out front, both of which usually power their houses since they don’t typically draw a TON of energy, though they do have a generator that runs on fuel as a backup.

okay if we’re describing the whole family im gonna shunt this under a cut this goes on for a while dsfjhgjhskfgd

GEORGETTE SCARLATINA: the matriarch of the family! well, sorta; she’s let her own daughters sort of have run of the place in her stead, because she’s “retired” now and that means she mostly sits back and enjoys not Working all the time. back in her heyday the woman was an absolutely powerhouse, 24/7 on the grind, but even now she’s very… well, she’s still a force to be reckoned with, really, and whilst she isn’t uuuuuuuh Strict, per se, she’s very disciplined, and no matter what her kids and grandkids choose to do, she expects them to really throw themselves into it. weiss is both terrified of her and desperately wants her approval, which isn’t hard to get, but weiss is, how they say, dumbass. georgette is also the reason why taffeta and cotton are… Like That. like what? stubborn loud fuzzy taking zero shit, etc,

RAJAH SCARLATINA: scarlatina women seem to always land themselves timid men and nobody is sure how, or why, but georgette wasnt the first to start this trend and shes def not the one to end it. rajah is pretty mild-mannered, but like georgette, never rested when people needed help. he and ash (and tenné) get on real well because they’re happy enough to mind their own Fuckin Business whilst their wives barrel around with all the grace of rampaging bulls. still, rajah’s also very much a product of his time as an early settler to menagerie; he’s never really… happy with everything, because they lost so much leaving for this shithole, so he’s always kinda… mildly sad about stuff, but the same can be said of any faunus his age tbh.

COTTON SCARLATINA: the older of the two Scarlatina Daughters, cotton is… manic. full of energy, always looking to burn it off. she’s an optimist at heart since she and taffeta came to menagerie when they were ten and therefore are more accustomed to the island, and her primary objective is making a good home and a good start for the family. she’s not too interested in politics or revolution, mainly because she’s the type of woman who plans by meals and mouths to feed, if u get me. she’s also pretty smug because her side of the family are rly growing up (TWO wives. a GRANDKID. its ALL COMING UP COTTON) and it means she gets to spend more time doing stuff she’s passionate abt!!!!!!! nice!!!!!!!!

TENNÉ SCARLATINA: i put an accent on his name and i regret it every day of my life. anyway. tenné isn’t entirely sure how he ended up with just The Most scarlatina, but he did and, well, there’s no backing out now. tenné‘s a deer faunus and was around cotton’s age when he and his family moved with the scarlatinas to menagerie, so he and cotton have always been close. he’s very patient and doesn’t always have a lot to say, but he and cotton are a great team when it comes to managing the entire homestead together. again, he’s not a political type, and just wants to keep his corner of things safe in uncertain times. he always pretty rarely leaves the homestead for anything, so he’s also kinda reclusive, but so is cotton! it all works out!

HAWTHORN SCARLATINA: i won’t go into the partners lest i Die but hawthorne is the eldest child of cotton and tenné. got antlers like his da, and he’s a pretty big fellow by scarlatina standards (that is to say, not thin enough to fly away in a stiff breeze). hawthorn is… well, long and short, he’s a himbo, but he’s also a pretty devoted homesteader (this is a trend! watch this space). his wife, saffron, was from desert sands and they’d been dating for a While before they got married, and they’re the first to have kids of all the first-gen* scarlatinas. he’s got cotton’s love of the family and tenné’s sort of quiet offset nature, though he was pretty rowdy as a kid (he grew out of that once velvet broke his nose tho).

RAMIE AND BIRCH SCARLATINA: twins! twins! oh my god! twins!!! fraternal twins!!!

ramie is the older of the two (my friends who were w/ me when we played the RWBY ttrpg will Remember Her) and she’s. well she’s surprisingly enough like taffeta that cotton jokes that clearly she’s gone and had the wrong kid. she’s very Firm abt things and has a way of naturally corralling people to follow after her, if only because this bitch has enough common sense for herself and, like, five people. she was also voted Best Lesbian Cousin five years in a row, and she and auburn get on like a house on fire. they’re also very into PDA, don’t mind them.

birch is the younger of the two and ramie always calls them the emo one. they’re not really so much into people as they are into their crafts and their plants (their bedroom looks like a greenhouse dont mind them) and they have tenné’s nature and georgette’s focus on working all the goddamn time. they’re good company is you strike up convo in the areas they have interest in, but sometimes it’s like talking to a brick wall. ramie is very fluent in their noncommittal grunts of disinterest, though.

FIR SCARLATINA: he’s one year old. he’s a baby. idk shit.

TAFFETA SCARLATINA: here’s the bitch we’ve all been waiting for

taffeta is like georgette if georgette was somehow more like herself. whereas the other half of the family are more core to the values of the clan, taffeta’s a tribe woman, and when she wakes up in the morning her focus is always on the wider community. taffeta’s very much just a machine of intent; she farms, she builds, she repairs, she trades, she gives, she travels, she does SO much and she’s very much the face of the family at present (which is why ppl hear the name ‘scarlatina and go ‘oh god’ w/o realising the other half wont bother u even slightly djsfggjsdfh). she’s STURDY she’s FLUFFY and she has zero qualms abt putting u in a headlock if u deserve one. dont test her. that said, taffeta’s a very reasonable woman; i’ll eventually go more into that at some nebulous point in the future hdjsgfjghksfd

ASH SCARLATINA: it’s everyone’s favourite da! i’ll TRY and keep this short. ash (MUCH LIKE THE MEN SO FAR) is just. so chilled out. can everyone PLEASE be quiet. well, he didn’t used to be – ash lived in kuo kuana before meeting taffeta and had such severe anxiety abt crowds that the boy could barely put a sentence together, let alone much else, not in the scarlatina household, he’s very calm and hard to ruffle. ash really just likes to do his thing, which is everything taffeta doesn’t do; he cooks, he watches the kids, he fixes stuff in the workshop, and he’s big into photography of the family, which is where velvet gets it from! ash is basically taffeta’s counterbalance, but being with her means he’s also become pretty well known about the town (if not for. entirely the reasons you think,)

CHIFFON SCARLATINA: the eldest of ash and taffeta’s kids! chiffon is a weird one; she takes a lot after ash in that she’s pretty reserved and doesn’t let a lot bother her, and when stuff does bother her, she expresses it pretty quietly. also, unlike her cousins who are all homebodies, chiffon was the first kid to actually leave the homestead for kuo kuana to work on the docks during a biiiig overhaul and extension of the boardwalk. she wanted to get out and see the world, but human tourists really out her off the idea, so after about a year and a bit she ended up returning home where she’s stayed ever since. after taffeta retires, she’ll probably be the next face people know and relate to the name scarlatina, tbh.

VELVET SCARLATINA: do i. do i have to say anything about her. you KNOW this bitch. anyway. velvet’s got taffeta’s stubborn sense and ash’s compassion, wants to travel like chiffon, has enough determination to just keep going when it gets her down. extremely stupid. herbo energy. trans jock. has fists will punch. fluffy. fuzzy. hot. dumbass. seriously, do i have to say anything else?

SATIN SCARLATINA: it’s a baby! just kidding, she’s 11. satin is pretty young but she’s at that age where she’s tryna figure out the world for herself. she’s already shaping up to be a lot like taffeta – bold and brash and determined – and much like her older siblings, politics is already playing into her interests. satin really wants to see vale and her tribelands, but after what happened to velvet at uni, taffeta’s trying to… well, not talk her out of it, but encourage her, gently, to reconsider. it’s not working. she and chiffon get on spectacularly well, and she and velvet get on ever better.

HICKORY SCARLATINA: okay, NOW baby. well………. okay, yeah, he’s 7. hickory is a little dreamer, never really in the present. he’s super into making stuff and helping out the adults around the homestead, and he’s not really noticed enough to be infuriated like satin, so he’s got that youthful, uh, innocence, let’s say, that means right now? life is GREAT! eventually he’ll find out that no, it’s not all that great, tbh, but right now he’s a champ at feeding the rabbits, pulling up veggies, and finishing his plate. good job hickory!

AND THAT’S THE FAM (save for the inlaws). theyre great and i think abt em all the time. could u tell? could u tell, sharkie,

*so i looked up the whole ‘generations’ thing to check if i was right and it turns out both first-gen and second-gen have incompatible definitions (thanks america) but for the sake of not going nuts, all of cotton’s and taffeta’s kids r first gen and fir is second-gen. u could also argue cotton and taff are first-gen on account of being pretty young when they came to menag but honestly it’s too complicated. lets just leave it at that sdfjhgksdf

Hathor & Sekhmet

Hathor: About to slap myself so you'll feel it Hathor: wherever you are ain't where you should be Sekhmet: what im sleep Sekhmet: 😴😴😴 Hathor: wake up 👊🏽 Hathor: you asked me to meet you, remember? Sekhmet: I think that's tomorrow Sekhmet: I said Wednesday, right Hathor: That's today Hathor: you blackout past Tuesday? Sekhmet: You're joking Sekhmet: well then, that means I've got a deadline I gotta meet and not a whole lot of time for brunch dates Hathor: you're joking Hathor: I cancelled on a fine boy for you Sekhmet: it's so early you got time to hit it back Sekhmet: I know I didn't tell you I'd meet you at the crack of dawn Hathor: you didn't and you're late af still Sekhmet: chill sis, I'll make it up to you Hathor: yeah Hathor: anyone else'd be offended you don't ever want to have a sober conversation Hathor: but I'll see you in the club Sekhmet: girl, chill 😂 Sekhmet: how fine was he that you're all kinds of vexed with me Sekhmet: don't even care how I'm gonna make it up to you, oh my days 🥴🍆🧠 for real Hathor: he's got prospects, I'm not saying any more than that if you're not coming out 👅 Hathor: I'll care how you're gonna make it up when you next show up for real Sekhmet: ugh! living up to your name 🐮 Sekhmet: bitch I'm busy 😏 the juggle is real Hathor: you know I don't say that shit lightly except once in a blue moon, however fine a lad be looking Hathor: but if you don't wanna hear it Sekhmet: is he 🧑🏾🧑🏿 Hathor: 🥛 Hathor: nobody is more surprised than me Sekhmet: 👏🙌 yay Sekhmet: I told you, white boys are the best Sekhmet: they treat us like 👸 Hathor: It's his Irish accent tricking me Hathor: I gotta take a trip back and cure myself Sekhmet: awh, you're homesick, precious Sekhmet: now it makes sense why you wanna tie me down Hathor: can barely understand him he's from so far north, more likely that Sekhmet: throwback 📟 📠 📺 📻 Hathor: get the psych dept to pull their shrink shit on me about it Sekhmet: You wanna be just like Vee, sorted Sekhmet: take my PhD now 💁 Hathor: be more disrespectful! first you stand me up and then put that out there Sekhmet: 🤭 you've got a ways to go, even if you're rolling mad extra today Hathor: I didn't ask 👼🏽💘 to 🎯 me up in the 🍑 Hathor: got my own things I'm busy with Sekhmet: love is magic 💖 Sekhmet: don't be complaining in my inbox when I'm tragically single Hathor: I've been serving and swerving him for long enough I thought I'd succeeded, there's the complaint Sekhmet: 🙄 you can't ❌ feelings bitch Hathor: white boys are a different animal, I ❌ the fear of Sekhmet: 😍😍😍 Hathor: I'm not here to be treated like a 👸🏽 if that's one step away from being called 'exotic' Hathor: there's nothing sexy about a power imbalance Sekhmet: most girls would disagree, babe Sekhmet: why do you wanna be run of the mill every day when we been #blessed with this 🔥 Sekhmet: all black guys wanna chat about is my light-skin privilege and their black man struggles, I can't 🥱 Hathor: fetishization like that ain't foreplay I'm interested in Hathor: 👑 me for other reasons than my melanin Sekhmet: insecurities SNAPPED, I'm sure he likes you for more than your skin, you crazy Hathor: he likes me for how I pour measures rn Sekhmet: racial Sekhmet: that's why everyone likes you 💃💃💃 Hathor: on account of being a poor student not Northern Irish, don't be biting the hand that feeds your blackouts Sekhmet: my white boys always pay Hathor: #blessed innit Sekhmet: 👸😇 tings Hathor: which white boy you with ignoring your deadline then? Sekhmet: whoever it is they've gone to work Sekhmet: but they left a 💳 with their cute note so I know I'm in a good postcode still 🙏 Hathor: so come meet me and spare mine, that's the right thing to do Sekhmet: just 'cos it's good doesn't mean I'm not lost still, damn Sekhmet: hold on and let me get dressed and get my bearings Hathor: if your phone ain't drained I can use it to get your bearings while you serve a look Sekhmet: who doesn't have a charger in their hoe 👜 PLEASE Hathor: you didn't know what day it was, can't blame me for 👶🏽ing Sekhmet: where would I be without you 😘 Sekhmet: mum hasn't phoned me in ages actually, it's so rude Sekhmet: I missed the last few but still Hathor: I hit her with your highlights, creatively Hathor: like how I won't mention a white boy making me feel like a baby 🐮 that can't walk Sekhmet: 😶😶 Sekhmet: dad would 😥 Hathor: and she'll 🙌🏽 harder than you've done Sekhmet: facts are facts Sekhmet: look at her dad, Vee's... Hathor: cliches are tired and stereotypes are damaging Sekhmet: @ your white boy with the 👋 then booboo Sekhmet: I think dad's in town working today, you wanna come for dinner with us? 🥂 Hathor: he's not mine to command in or out 👅 Hathor: yeah 🍾 will help Sekhmet: I'll teach you Hathor: those twin stereotypes are damaging too, like Sekhmet: oh hush, I only tried to 💋 you ONE time and we were like babies and that boy was the first great love of my life Sekhmet: anyway, you're like hot but not my types type these days, you know Hathor: that boy was trash Hathor: you levelled up fast though Sekhmet: awh, don't be rude, I have fond memories Hathor: I have loads of him trying to ask me out at the same time Sekhmet: oh yeah Sekhmet: I forgot that happened Sekhmet: his hair was gorgeous though Hathor: it was Sekhmet: good times Sekhmet: my new guy, not this one, the actual one, looks like old school Leo, I SWEAR Hathor: Yeah? Sekhmet: like Leo and a bit of River and Ryan Philippe in Cruel Intentions Sekhmet: 🥰🥰🥰 Hathor: love of your life material Sekhmet: definitely Sekhmet: he's a trader in the city and his apartment is 😱😱😱 Hathor: what's the age range this time? Sekhmet: he's only 26, it's mad how successful he is already Hathor: he sounds like the full 🎟 Hathor: any catch? Sekhmet: only technically Hathor: technically he's a 🤖? Sekhmet: ha, he totally has the stamina of one Sekhmet: he can keep up with me, almost 😉 Hathor: 👌🏽 he's perfect Hathor: fucking hell Sekhmet: no need to be jealous when you're 🥰 yourself Sekhmet: what does he look like? Hathor: Tall enough Hathor: more like a 🥊 than a 👼🏻 Sekhmet: you really do wanna do great grandpa Sekhmet: jk, he sounds so you Hathor: he does work for the main brewery that supplies us, maybe I do Hathor: Jesus Christ Sekhmet: 😂😬 processing that Sekhmet: not really though, every boy I've ever dated has been like dad, it's unavoidable tbh 💁 Hathor: in our postcode nobody's trying very hard to be anything else Hathor: 💰💳💎🍾 Sekhmet: why would they? Hathor: they wouldn't and they aren't, it'd be terrifying for any of those boys to step out Sekhmet: 🙄 you aren't going to throw yourself down a ladder when you're at the top, babe Hathor: wouldn't kill them to give other people a hand up though, they just act like it Sekhmet: 🥱 when's your deadline? Hathor: my work's done Sekhmet: then button it, loser Sekhmet: you wanna eat out on this nice rich boy's 💳 Hathor: ETA of 15 on getting to you Hathor: you best 🚿 Sekhmet: way ahead of you 🛀 Sekhmet: door's unlocked, our breakfast will hopefully be on the table when you get here Sekhmet: love ubereats Hathor: 🙌🏽 Sekhmet: you can bring it through, the view in this bathroom is immense Sekhmet: thought getting the driver to bring it to the tub was unlikely Hathor: he probably would but it's unlikely I'd recover from walking in on it Sekhmet: 😘 Sekhmet: do fuck with an asian boy Hathor: you don't know he will be Hathor: might not even be a lad Hathor: but if it is, guarantee they'll send the most unexpected one Sekhmet: it usually is, your stereotypes be damned Hathor: what are you gonna bet? Sekhmet: the Belgian 🧇s Hathor: you're on Sekhmet: sometimes you shock me with how green you are, Hath Hathor: back to putting disrespect on me, what a nice truce while it lasted, like Sekhmet: I mean, you know I can see the driver on my app, babe Sekhmet: no points for guessing where Hassan is from Sekhmet: you can have the 🧇s anyway Hathor: you know I can read your thoughts, the playing field is level Hathor: and anyway I like green, that's my boy's eye colour Sekhmet: been gazing into them longingly across the bar have we🤭 Hathor: maybe Sekhmet: so cute Sekhmet: hope this one doesn't have a fiancee Sekhmet: or a maid who thinks we've broken in Hathor: if he does he better break that eye contact with me Sekhmet: I meant Mr Black Card, don't worry Sekhmet: he's a student, yeah? he won't be Hathor: he's only got a year on us, I don't predict an engagement Sekhmet: yeah, doubt it Hathor: outside of our family people aren't usually that extra Sekhmet: some of the asian internationals are but they usually cheat if their intended ain't here yet so Hathor: Yeah Sekhmet: what even does an engagement mean anyway Sekhmet: not much, right Hathor: a flash 💍 Hathor: what's my course teaching me if I don't know the statistics on how often a wedding follows? Hathor: shows how outdated it is Sekhmet: he gives me that anyway Hathor: I'd take a phone number and be happy with it for now Hathor: but it's probably the party and that whole flex too, right? Sekhmet: the dress Sekhmet: but it's irrelevant if it doesn't happen, like you said Hathor: 🎁🎁 even if it doesn't if people bring them for the engagement as well, but you're not going short of any Sekhmet: right Sekhmet: 😥 if you need a wedding for attention Hathor: Jay's birth mum QUAKING Sekhmet: omg I bet that's EXACTLY what his fiancee is like Hathor: does he ever speak about her? Sekhmet: obviously not Sekhmet: but she must never come up from wherever they're from because I'm like ALWAYS over so Hathor: maybe she doesn't know about this place Hathor: old school Sekhmet: Who knows Sekhmet: can't be my problem Hathor: Yours is the day you've missed, like Hathor: what's the assignment? Sekhmet: design some sportswear line Sekhmet: got to get the sketches in by 5, but all I ordered for me was a shit ton of coffee, it'll be fine Hathor: more productive if I stay or go? Sekhmet: you've already missed your date, you may as well stay Hathor: okay Hathor: am the sportier one Sekhmet: how are you 😂 Hathor: ⚽⛹🏽🚴🏽🥊 Hathor: why dad loves me more than you Sekhmet: now I know you're talking nonsense 😏 Hathor: True, he loves Vee and she never gets off her chaise Sekhmet: and she doesn't even love him back Hathor: poor dad Sekhmet: yeah Hathor: what time's dinner with him? Sekhmet: I'll ask him when he wants to go Hathor: about to come up, so whatever you were planning for Hassan, this is me Sekhmet: regrettably noted