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whatsk-poppinhomies · 10 months

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Pairing : Hwang Hyunjin x F!Reader & Lee Felix x F!Reader TW : For Hyunjin : reader has a broken leg ; reader gets hit by a passenger van ; mentions of blood ; Hyunjin isn't really an asshole, he's just upset ; it's really fluffy at the end though ; For Felix : reader gets stabbed ; reader is in the hospital ; reader gets stitches ; Word Count : For Hyunjin : 2.9k For Felix : 5.8k (In total 8.7k) Request : @slayhyunjin wants the Hyunlix version of this and that is what they will get!! A/N : I hope you enjoy this and I'm sorry for making you wait so long for it : ' (( WENT ALL IN ON THE FELIX ONE! PLEASE ENJOY!!!

Hyunjin

He was on a mini tour, at least, that’s what you called it when he had to perform concerts closer to home. He was still gone, but he was in the country and it meant that he’d be home sooner which was always exciting. It was the one thing, the only thing you loved about when he went away… The moment he’d come back and it was like he had been gone for an eternity instead of just a couple months.

You loved surprising him when he came home too, saving up all the money you made at your work to buy him little things to add to his art room. New paint sets, a new canvas, new sketch pads and pencils. Anything that would make him happy, and he always got excited over the smallest things, but seeing the way his eyes would sparkle when he saw the new materials on his desk made the wait for him worth it.

This particular trip you had saved up enough money to buy him a brand new watercolor paint set, something that you knew he had his eyes on for a while. Luckily the art store was only a couple blocks away and you enjoyed the walk from the apartment to the shop, always stopping by the little cafe on your way there to get an iced americano, it made you feel closer to him when drinking his favorite drink and picking up his favorite things.

Spring time was your favorite time to walk, the scents of fresh flowers blooming and new leaves budding on the trees. It also meant the occasional rain that you were always prepared for, your umbrella hanging from your wrist as you walked along fairly busy sidewalks.

You had been in the store when it started raining, and you were planning on waiting it out close to the entrance like everyone else was, but this particular storm decided to last much longer than you had planned, so you ventured out. It’s not that the rain bothered you, it was more so that you didn’t want the set that you had bought to be potentially ruined.

It was crazy how things can go from being so perfect so fucked in a matter of seconds. First you’re walking across the street because the crosswalk light tells you it’s okay, and the next you’re being hit by a passenger van that didn’t even have the common decency to stop and make sure you were okay. At least they didn’t continue straight through and just completely run you over. They had simply gone over your leg which was still excruciatingly painful, but it definitely could have been worse.

Now, a lot of people might be wondering, why not call Hyunjin and let him know what happened?! And while it’s a very good question, you knew how he was. God, his heart was so big, his love for you was so strong, he’d try to get home to you so fast that he’d probably make the journey on foot if there wasn’t a flight that would get him to the nearest airport available right then and there. Not just that, but he’d stop at nothing to find whoever it was that hurt you, he’d track them down to the ends of the planet just to yell at them for hurting his love.

He was busy, you didn’t want to bother him with the silly little accident, and what was important was the fact that somehow, by some miracle, the watercolor set had survived. After going to the hospital and getting your leg casted up and making sure that nothing else was broken during the accident, you got to go back home and place the set in the center of his desk with the giant bow on it, anticipating the moment that he finally came home and saw it.

What you realized while trying to perfectly set up the watercolor set and make it look pretty was that it was a pain in the ass to try to walk on your cast, although the doctor had already strongly advised you not to do that… You thought that it was just a general thing he had to say to everyone. No wonder they were so hell bent on making sure you had someone at home to help you around the house the first couple of days. You couldn’t do shit.

A surprise visit home, that’s what he was planning. He had been talking to the guys about it for a solid week, and now it was the day. He stood at the front door, taking a deep breath before letting himself in, only to be met with the apartment in such a state of disarray that he had to do a double take to make sure he was heading into the right apartment.

Following the double take he saw you on the couch, that’s how he was 100% sure he was at the right place, but it didn’t make any sense. There were bowls of food and empty cups and take-out bags everywhere around you, and you were just laying on the couch all cozied up like you didn’t care. When he first met you, you were so organized, so clean, and not to the point of needing everything to be absolutely perfect but you surely weren’t like this. Maybe it was an act, and maybe the house looked like this every time he went on tour. The only reason it looked so clean when he came back all the other times was because he had told you he was coming.

“It’s… It’s such a mess…” He muttered to himself as he stepped deeper into the apartment, his heart sinking as he thought about how he almost left Kkami in your care. “There’s just… Mess everywhere…” He continued to talk to himself as he continued to look around. It looked like there hadn’t been any sort of cleaning done in weeks. This is the house that he lived in… He just couldn’t believe it.

You had been sleeping so soundly, but he tripped over one of your crutches, causing it to fall over and hit the floor, the sudden noise causing you to jolt awake. “Hyunjin! You’re home! You wouldn’t believe the week I had.” You said, your smile bright as you looked at him over the back of the couch. How could you still be so cheerful when surrounded by such filth? You must be used to it… But he wasn’t. He couldn’t live like this, and he surely couldn’t be with someone who regularly lived like this, who pretended to be someone they clearly weren’t when around him.

“I was just leaving.” He rushed the words out as he walked back towards the door. “I can’t be here… It’s just… Disgusting… I have to go.” He excused as he quickly walked out, accidentally slamming the door behind him. That was the irony of it though, the fact that your crutches had been the item that he tripped on, yet his mind had been so fogged by the filth that he didn’t even think to question what they were doing there. He didn’t even second guess their presence considering everything else looked so out of place.

Truthfully, he wasn’t even mad… He was just upset. The person that he saw today in his apartment was not the person that he had fallen in love with, and surely not the person that he imagined a future with. It’s not that he expected you to be his maid while he was working either, he knew that you worked, you were just as busy a person as he was, but he just thought that maybe you’d want the house to be kept a little clean… That’s the type of person you made it seem like you were… He was upset that he had been wrong.

Your blanket had somehow managed to get wrapped around you while you were napping on the couch, it made it impossible to kick it off in time for you to get up or for him to even see the cast around your leg. Of course, it would have been nice if he would have just let you explain, but you could understand his irritation.

As you looked around the house, you finally took in just how unsightly it was. It looked like there had been parties going on since he left and you hadn’t cleaned up after any of them. It was disgusting, you hated it, and you yourself would have been just as upset if you walked into your house and seen it looking like this.

“Shit…. Shit!” You hissed, unwrapping yourself from the blanket before trying to get up. It hurt, but nothing would hurt worse than Hyunjin leaving you, so you dealt with it, gritting your teeth to muffle your cries of pain as you started to clean up, trying your best to shift the weight off your bad leg, but it was almost impossible considering the mess that you had to avoid to get to the garbage can.

You weren’t even sure how so much shit had accumulated, but there were pizza boxes stacked up on the coffee table beside the carry–out bags, and there were the discarded plastic bags piling around you from when you’d get out the shower and just rip them off and place them to the side, promising yourself that you’d throw them away later.

Damp towels laid on the floor beside the dirty clothes hamper, towels from when you’d pull them from off your head, tossing them and hoping they’d make it in only for them to land everywhere but where you wanted. Again, you had promised to get to it, but you never had. It truly was disgusting, and even though your leg felt like it was on the verge of falling off right now just from walking on it, it shouldn’t be an excuse for how disgusting the house had gotten.

Aside from walking… Everything else was also a pain in the ass. You couldn’t bend over to grab things off the floor, although you were trying your best, but the gravitational pull of the earth had different ideas and you ended up falling face first to the floor, managing to bust your lip and bloody your nose in the process. It wasn’t bad enough that everything was a mess, but now you were just as bad off as the apartment.

What’s worse is that you couldn’t even get up. There was nothing close enough to give you the leverage that you needed, and your good leg was in just about as much pain as the broken one from you trying to catch your fall and landing right on your knee. Your phone was somewhere amongst the pile of garbage on the coffee table and you couldn’t even crawl over there to get it, you were left on the floor, and you felt that that’s where you belonged, alongside all the garbage that you had created.

Hyunjin was quick to realize that he had been wrong… Not about you, but about the situation. Not as quick as he wished he had been, but he was back at the dorms and he couldn’t stop beating himself up about the way he had left you. He hadn’t been rude, not exactly, not the way other people would have been… But he wasn’t exactly nice either.

He had gone back to the dorms, and the rest of the guys were still back at the hotel in the city they had just performed in. He felt more lonely than ever and he knew that he needed to talk to you to apologize for the way he had been acting, so he texted you. He would have gone back to the apartment, but he was so nervous about how you’d react to him suddenly showing back up that he felt it would be better if he just texted you first to ask if he could come back.

There was no response, and that made sense… Obviously you’d be mad at him for walking out the way he did… And now he was playing back those moments in his head, the moments that led up to him walking out… And he couldn’t stop thinking about the crutches that he had tripped over. Why were they even there? They hadn’t been there when he left… But if something had happened to you that would require you to need them… You would have told him about it… Right?

But what if you hadn’t told him about it… And something really bad happened… And that’s why you weren’t answering his texts. He hoped that wasn’t what was wrong… For the first time since being with you he was hoping that you were just mad at him and ignoring him. At least in that case you would still be okay. That didn’t stop him from panicking though. He called a cab and waited impatiently outside for them to pull up, not even waiting for the car to come to a complete stop before climbing in the back and giving the driver the address.

As soon as he got to the building he ran up the stairs, bursting through the front door and it felt like he was about to die, his heart breaking when he saw you laying in the middle of the floor. You looked absolutely lifeless, a puddle of blood on the floor next to your face, and the cast that wrapped from your foot up to your mid thigh explained everything. “Help… Please…” Your voice weakly called from the middle of the floor, and the only reason any sound of relief came from his lips is because you weren’t dead.

“I’m here…” He whimpered, already crying as he rushed over to you and helped you off the floor, his arms wrapped tightly around your waist to help support you as walked you back over to the couch. “I’m so sorry for leaving you, my love… I didn’t even wait to hear your reason… I just left…” He was full of shame and guilt as he looked at you, the blood that had trickled from your nose now dried on your upper lip and your bottom lip busted open from where it hit the floor. “One second… let me get something…”

He rushed off the couch and to the kitchen, grabbing a towel and soaking it in cold water before running back and lightly wiping away the blood. “I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have let it get this bad. I would have been the same way… It just hurt so bad to walk and… I hate the crutches, they hurt my arms and… I’m sorry.” You mumbled, and he quickly pulled you into a hug, lightly pushing against the back of your head to muffle your words against his shoulder.

“I don’t care about the apartment, love… I care about you.” He whispered, repeatedly kissing the top of your head as he said the words. “Now… Tell me what happened… Please.”

You were right… Hyunjin had gone from crying profusely when he heard about the accident, his head shaking as he apologized over and over for not being there for you, although you repeatedly told him that you were the one that didn’t tell him. As soon as the tears stopped flowing though, he was angry, angry at the driver who so carelessly injured and could have potentially stolen away his love. He was so angry in fact, that he planned on having management go to every store with a security camera and demand the footage from the day that it happened so they could track down the person who did it.

After he had calmed down as much as he could, he called the guys to let them all know he wouldn’t be able to come back for the rest of the concerts, explaining to them that you needed him more than they did, and no, you couldn’t get him to change his mind, and none of the guys tried to get him to change his mind either. You were now stuck with a slightly overbearing and overly apologetic Hyunjin who didn’t leave your side at all.

“Why were you walking around down that way though? Your work isn’t down there…” He mused one evening, still unable to get over what had happened and trying his best to piece it all together although you had explained everything to him. You sighed softly, suggesting for him to check the art room, and he gently moved your leg from off his lap as he ran to the room, his squeal of excitement loud enough for not only you, but probably the neighbors on all sides of you to hear as well. “You almost got killed to get me this?!” He called from the room, and you giggled lightly.

“It’s the one you wanted, right?” You called back, as he came out from around the corner of the door, tears in his eyes as he clutched the box against his chest, his head nodding fast in response to your question. “Then it was worth it… I’m glad you like it, babe.”

“I don’t deserve your love!” You cried out as he rushed back over to the couch where you were resting, leaning over the back to catch your lips in a deep kiss. “I’m gonna paint your cast and make it look so pretty… You’ll be my canvas until it gets taken off.”

Felix

“You really can’t go with me this time?” Felix asked as he stood just off to the side of the TSA line at the airport. He had been asking the question since he found out he and the guys were going to Australia for a couple tour dates. Sadly your work schedule wouldn’t allow it to be done, and as much as you asked and practically begged for even three days off, they just couldn’t do it. You shook your head before kissing his lips softly, then doing the same to each of his cheeks, a salty taste clinging to your own lips from the tears that he had shed on the way to the airport. “I’m gonna miss you, angel… Be safe, remember to lock the doors, and look both ways before crossing the street… And don’t talk to strangers and don’t walk down alleys at night and-”

“Lixie…” You whispered, cutting him off for the sole purpose of, you knew he was stalling. He hated leaving you, and you hated when he left, but neither of you really had a choice in the matter. “You’re gonna miss your flight…” You reminded him, and he looked down at his phone that was open to his boarding pass, his bottom lip jutted out.

“So what if I did? Then I’d get to stay with you… Is that so bad?” He retorted and you truly wished it was that easy, but the both of you knew that it wasn’t, and the way that he said wasn’t the way that it would play out.

“The company would be pissed at both of us… And they’d just send you out on the next flight…” You explained, although he already knew that that’s what would happen. It didn’t stop him from wishfully thinking though. “Go on… I’ll be right here waiting for you when you get back. I’ll even have a big sign with your name on it… If management lets me.”

He chuckled, although the sound was more sad than anything else and he pulled you into his arms, squeezing you tightly as he took a deep breath of you, holding it in his lungs as if he was going to carry it with him the whole time. “Always wait for me, okay? I’ll always wait for you… I love you… I already miss you… Fuck… I have to go… I love you so much… So so much…” He continued to profess his love as he walked backwards into the line, his eyes squeezing shut every couple of seconds as tears rolled down his cheeks once more.

Every night he’d call you before you went to work, the joys of working the evening shift, and most of the call would be him just telling you that he loves you and how much he misses you and how much he wishes you were there with him. You’d tell him that it was going to be okay, that you’d be together soon and that you loved him too. The calls usually left you both crying, and you’d have to tell him that you’d be late for work if the call continued. Then he’d call you every night after work, asking you how your day went and once again telling you that he loved you, how he wanted so badly to be laying next to you in his hotel bed, holding onto you and burying his face in your hair, the smell of your shampoo filling his nose and helping him sleep better. He needed you, and you needed him too, it was only two weeks until he came back… It would be okay.

“It’s getting dark out, are you sure you don’t want me to drive you home?” Your boss asked as she stood at the door, leaning against it to hold it open for you. “I don’t mind it, I don’t want you walking out here by yourself.”

You hummed softly, shaking your head as you walked past her, adjusting your purse on your shoulder as you paused just outside the door. “I’ll be okay, I walk home all the time. I’ll see you tomorrow, drive safely.” You said cheerfully, anticipating the call that would come from Felix as soon as you got home.

The walk was always pleasant, the summer breeze that came with the hidden sun always felt nice when he blew around you, taking a deep breath and letting the fresh air fill your lungs… Until it didn’t. The breath that you tried to take now burned, the pain in your side wasn’t too bad, not until you tried to breath again and you couldn’t, it felt like your lungs were on fire.

“You need to be more aware of your surroundings, angel. You could get hurt.” You remembered Felixs words from a time not too long ago when you had started to walk across the street before the traffic had even stopped, so happy just being with him that you didn’t even take the time to look around. The words rang true as you finally looked down, noticing the knife that was still plunged into your side.

It was crazy how it didn’t start really hurting until you looked at it, and then, as if the world had been on mute for a couple minutes, all of the sound came back and you could hear bystanders screaming as they rushed over to you. “It’s okay! We’ve called an ambulance and the police! It’s okay! Just hold on!” You didn’t know who this person was, he simply caught you before you collapsed onto the ground, gently lowering you down, using the sleeve of his shirt to wipe the blood from your mouth every time you opened it. The taste of copper was nauseating and you couldn’t help but retch when it would coat your tongue. “No no… Don’t do that… It’ll make it worse!”

The knife still hadn’t been pulled out yet, and you remembered reading somewhere that if it had been pulled out immediately that you would have bled to death… But god, the pain was worse than whatever death could possibly feel like. “The ambulance is on its way! Someone caught her! They’re waiting for the police!” You could faintly hear a woman scream, but the sound of your breathing, if you could even call it that, was much louder in your ears. The rattle of your lungs and the heavy wheezing was so annoying, but sadly you couldn’t mute that sound considering it was coming from you.

There wasn’t much that you could do, there wasn’t anything you could do really… Just laying there, listening to the rattle and the commotion and the distant sirens that you knew were coming for you. All you could do was dive into your own mind, try to think of something, anything to make this moment just a little more bearable. Felix. He was the only thing you could think of. The way his smile brightened even the darkest nights, the way he’d come back home after performing and you’d have the honor of wiping off his makeup, kissing along his cheeks as his perfect freckles reappeared from under the makeup. The way his hair would drip onto your face after a shower when he’d climb on top of you, his fingers tickling your sides as he smothered you with kisses. He was your happy place, he always would be, and even if you died right now, there was no heaven that would ever be better than the one you got to live on earth when you were with him.

“Woman in custody after random stabbing near Yangjae-daero. Eyewitnesses say that the woman was a crazed fan, screaming that the victim “didn’t deserve to be with him.” Although the “him” in question was never specified. The victim is currently in the hospital with no update on her condition just yet…”

Bangchan shook his head as he read over the report, tossing his phone to the side and running his hands over his face. “I never thought that people would go this far. It’s ridiculous, it’s scary. We need to keep our girls safe.” He said, and Felix nodded his head in agreement, having been the first one to read the news. He hated that it was so close to your place of work, and he tried his best to call you and text you, but he was sure that right now you were being questioned by police about what you saw and heard.

“She’s probably so scared…” Felix murmured, checking his phone once more, but there were still no texts from you. “I don’t want her walking home by herself anymore… God, what if it had been her?” And while he wasn’t even 100% sure it wasn’t you, he wanted to believe you were okay, so he did. He filled his mind with every single scenario other than the one where you were the victim.

“Try not to worry too much, we’ll be going home tomorrow morning and you’ll be with her.” Chan said, but Felix felt it was quite hypocritical since his girlfriend had been texting him the entire time while Felix was getting nothing but silence from you. “Just try to get some sleep, okay?”

And he tried, he tried his best, but he couldn’t get even a wink of sleep without hearing your voice before bed, so many nights spent just laying on the hotel pillow that brought him no comfort since it didn’t smell like you, but he’d hear your voice, his phone on speaker but the volume low so that if he closed his eyes it sounded like you were really right there. He needed that, he needed you to call him, he needed you.

He wasn’t even close to falling asleep, it had been 4 hours, and the vibration from under his pillow had him rolling over onto his stomach to look at the screen that was so blinding in the darkness. You finally texted him though, he felt like he could finally breathe, at least a little bit. “Sorry for worrying you. Don’t worry, I’m fine. These cops had more questions than I thought they would.”

“It’s okay, I just needed to be sure you’re okay. Did you get home? Make sure to lock the doors, and if you need to go to work or anywhere, text Chans or Changbins girlfriends, they’d be happy to help you.” He knew you wouldn’t though, even though you’d be much safer if you did, you hated burdening people and putting them out of the way even if it meant you’d be safe. “Try to get some rest, it’s so late. I’ll call you tomorrow. I love you.” He texted and your response came quickly, telling him that you loved him too, that you hoped he slept well and had sweet dreams, and now that he knew you were okay, he knew that he’d be okay.

It had completely slipped his mind to let you know he was coming home the next day, he had finally gotten to sleep at 4am and he had to wake up at 6am to get to the airport by 7. A 10 hour flight, and he hoped he’d be able to sleep a little bit on the plane before he got to you, he didn’t want to be exhausted when he finally saw you.

By the time he landed in the afternoon his stomach was full of butterflies, his smile unwavering as he thought about how it would feel to hold you in his arms again. Of course you weren’t going to be at the airport waiting for him, you didn’t know he was coming home early. Nobody knew, but after the report, all of the guys wanted to go home to be with their girlfriends, there had never been such panic felt by Felix as the guys raced through the airport to get to the cars to go to see their girls. Felix felt the same way though, and while he hated comparing his emotions to anyone else's, his panic was far greater considering you had been so close.

Now, Felix loved a clean house as much as the next person, but he didn’t like it to be so clean that it felt like a sin to even walk across the floors. He liked things clean, but he still wanted the house to feel like it was lived in, he wanted it to feel like a home, which is why when he walked through the front door and saw your hoodie balled up on the bench instead of hung in the closet he felt nothing but warmth in his heart. It was your favorite hoodie, it was his hoodie, and seeing it on the bench meant that he’d be seeing you soon.

At least, that’s what he thought, but when he walked further into the house he still didn’t find you, but he did find a mess. Dishes still sat in the sink, begging to be washed. Your lounge clothes were discarded carelessly on the floor in the bedroom, not even brought to the dirty clothes hamper beside the washing machine, and speaking of the washer, the clothes that were in there had gone sour from being left to sit dampened in the bin for so long. There was a very big difference between a house being lived in, and a house just being dirty, and right now, the house felt dirty.

“Look…” He started the text, trying his best to sound as understanding as possible while also getting his point across. “I know you’ve seen some shit, but that doesn’t mean you can just let the house fall apart. I mean… Leaving dirty dishes in the sink? Leaving wet clothes in the washer? That could cause vermin… It could cause mold to build up in the washer and in the clothes. I thought you knew better… I thought you were better than that. I love you, but I’m not gonna pretend I’m not annoyed right now. I’ll stay at the dorms right now… And I’ll come back home tomorrow to help you with some stuff but… I don’t want to come back home and see the house like this. It’s kind of upsetting.”

Why didn’t you tell Felix about being stabbed… He wouldn’t have texted you that if he knew… He would be sitting in the hospital with you right now and comforting you. Well, there were a lot of reasons actually… But the main one was that you knew he’d blame himself for what happened. You thought that you’d be out of the hospital and at least able to do a little bit before he got home, you never thought he’d come back home early, and the most shocking part was the fact that all of the guys did.

It was a miracle that you were still alive, a little bit higher and the damage would have been way worse… At least that’s what the doctor said. It was also a miracle that you were being let out of the hospital only two days after getting major lung surgery, props to the surgeons and the amazing medical equipment that’s out now. Still, it’s not like you could really do much, there was actually more that you couldn’t do rather than what you could do. You just needed to keep your activity levels at a low and then you’d be totally fine. It’s not like you were running a marathon, you were just gonna go home and clean the house so that Felix wouldn’t be disappointed in you. Perfectly fine.

You ubered home considering the fact that Felix was annoyed with you and the last thing you needed was an apologetic clingy boyfriend to spend the entire car ride home belittling himself for saying such things to you. It’s not like he knew what happened, and it was his honest reaction, and to be fair, he had a point. Nothing he said in the text was wrong, and it wasn’t like he was vicious, he just didn’t want mice or roaches to take over and he didn’t want to deal with mold. Nobody wanted that, you didn’t want that. His annoyance was valid, and you didn’t want him to feel guilty over something he had no idea about.

And to be quite honest, the uber driver's face was priceless when he had asked you why you were in the hospital and you nonchalantly told him you got stabbed and had to have lung surgery. If laughing wasn’t on the list of things to do, you would have cracked up, but truthfully, it was painful to laugh. Breathing in itself was still quite painful, and it was crazy how you had to retrain yourself on how to breathe so that you weren’t in as much pain.

Walking into your home was like a breath of fresh air, except you couldn’t take that deep breath and instead you had to do a little sniff and just walking up the front stairs had you winded and you had to take a five minute breather on the couch before actually starting any chores. Crazy enough, the dishes, although they were your least favorite chore to do, they had been the easiest. There was no heavy lifting involved, there was no bending over… You finally found a reason to love doing the dishes.

While you were working in the kitchen, you had restarted the load of laundry that had been sitting in the washer, and it was just about done thankfully. All you had to do was switch the clothes into the drier and then you’d be able to take a little break. It was supposed to be quick and easy, and for the most part it was… Until that one last fucking sock at the bottom of the basin caught your eye. Everything, every bone in your body, your mind, your heart, everything was telling you to just leave it… But you couldn’t, and you stretched over the side of the basin, and you felt the tear, but in the moment you didn’t care because you were victorious, you had got that sock and you threw it in the drier and now you could rest.

Except you… you couldn’t rest… Because the warm trickle that ran down your side finally caught your full attention, and when you looked down at your shirt you could see the dark red stain that completely soaked through the fabric. Maybe it wouldn’t have been so bad if you didn’t start instantly panicking… But who wouldn’t panic when their stitches from a surgery like yours busted open? And there was so much blood… So much… You started hyperventilating and that hurt even more and you ended up getting light headed and falling to the floor. You truly felt like you were dying, and you knew that you needed to get to the hospital and sure… You could have called an ambulance, you could have called Felix… But he was upset with you and now there was blood all over the floor and for some foolish reason you thought he’d be mad about that, so you called the only other person you could think of.

Chans girlfriend was like a sister to you, and you quickly called her, and luckily she thought the same way about you and immediately picked up. You could hear the other guys in the background, you could even hear Felix… But you were more focused on the sound of Chans girlfriends voice, finding in it some will to keep from fainting at the sight of all the blood on the floor and the warmth that continued to pour down your side. “Hey, what’s going on? Do you need to be picked up from work?” She sounded so cheerful, her and Chan truly were a perfect match.

“No… I need… Hospital… Can you take me?” You gasped out, and the silence coming from her end was deafening. If it weren’t for the sound of the other guys goofing off in the background you would have just assumed she had hung up. “Please… Bleeding… I’m bleeding… Really bad…”

“Y-Yeah… Do you want me to bring him?” You knew exactly who she was talking about, but she was smart, she knew that there was a reason that you hadn’t called him, and whatever that reason was, you most likely didn’t want her to say his name to catch his attention… But she still wanted to be sure.

“Just you… Please… Hurry…” You mumbled, and it felt like you had used the last bit of energy to say those four words. Your arm fell limp at your side and you didn’t even end the call, it felt like the room was fading in and out and this… this feeling… it was way worse than being stabbed initially. At least then the knife held everything in. Now it seemed like you were bleeding out and you couldn’t even breathe without getting lightheaded. It was the absolute worst.

Chans girlfriend had rushed out of the dorms so fast, even Chan had no idea what was going on, and he had texted her non stop questioning where she went and what was wrong, but she hadn’t answered. With everything that was going on, it made him uneasy, and now Felix was the one telling him it would be okay, that is, until she walked back into the dorms. She was a completely different person, her eyes almost shell shocked, she looked like she had seen a ghost.

“What happened?” Chan had immediately rushed over to her, and she only shook her head, and Felix could see the tears in her eyes as she looked at him and then back to Chan, motioning for him to follow her into one of the empty rooms. It’s not that Felix was nosy, but the way she had looked at him had him questioning what the hell she had seen, and why she hadn’t looked at the other guys the same way. “What?!” Everyone froze when they heard Chans scream, and then the rushed out shushes from his girlfriend. “Why didn’t she say anything?! He doesn’t know! Is she okay?! Oh fuck!” There was a panic in his voice, a certain fear that no one had ever heard from their leader before. It was concerning, but everyone was frozen in their seats, stunned into silence as they listened to the conversation, which was more like Chans screaming and his girlfriend's incomprehensible whispers. “Well I can’t just not tell him! You know how he is! For fucks sake, what if she dies?! How do you think he’d feel?! I’m telling him!”

Everyone else pretended to go back to whatever it was they were doing beforehand once Chan came out from the room, everyone but Felix who had his eyes glued to Chan and his girlfriend who walked out behind him. They were both looking directly at him too, and it only made him more confused when they stopped right in front of him and now he was being motioned to follow them into the empty room. Why was this so secretive?

“You should sit…” Chan started once he had gotten Felix into his room, and that only confused him more as he slowly lowered down onto Chans bed. “Do you know… Fuck… How am I even supposed to tell him this?!” He looked back to his girlfriend who was leaning against the door, sniffling so quietly that Felix hadn’t even been aware that she was crying until now.

“Tell me what? Just say it!” Felix demanded, growing impatient with the back and forth of it all, and the urgency in their tones had him on edge and his knee was bouncing so fast that it was shaking the entire frame of the mattress. Clearly it was something important and it was meant for him… “Just spit it out!”

“Y/N is in the hospital.” Chans girlfriend blurted out and that was the first shot, it was more like a gut punch, it was unexpected, and while it was definitely concerning… It didn’t explain what Chan had said earlier when he thought no one was listening. “She was bleeding a lot and… Her stitches from the lung surgery… They ripped and… She was trying to do the laundry I guess… There was blood everywhere and… She was unconscious when I got to the house and I called an ambulance and followed them there but they wouldn’t let me in…”

Lung surgery… There was nothing wrong with your lungs, at least there hadn’t been when he had left for Australia. “She… She didn’t say anything… About that…” Felix stammered, his heart going a mile a minute and his mind reeling as he thought about what to do… What he could do. He felt helpless, there truly was nothing he could do right now to help you. “Why…. Why would she need lung surgery…. What happened?”

Chans girlfriend sighed as her head fell forward, her eyes sticking to the ground now. “She was the one… From the news report…” It took a couple seconds for him to finally get it, but once it clicked, he felt like he couldn’t breathe. “She shouldn’t have been trying to do chores… Why would she do that? She’s crazy… That stuff could have waited until you got home to help her.”

It was his fault… Everything was his fault. His legs were shaking as he got up off the bed, and he almost fell forward, he would have fallen to the floor if Chan hadn’t been there to catch him. “Hey… Hey look… There’s nothing you can do right now… Just stay here, rest… I’m sure the hospital will call when they fix things… You’re not okay right now… Just lay down.” Chan urged, pushing him back onto the bed, and he couldn’t even get up, it felt like there was a thousand pounds against his chest, holding him against the mattress.

“It’s my fault… It’s all my fault… Mine…” Felix muttered to himself through tears, rolling over and curling up into a ball on Chans bed, violent sobs shaking his entire body. “I’m gonna lose her… I’m gonna… She’s gonna be gone… I can’t… I can’t live… Not without her… I can’t do anything… I need her, hyung… I really do…” He stammered, and the only thing Chan could do, the only thing anyone could do was try to console him, and they did their best, but he only got quiet when he cried himself to the point of exhaustion, his puffy eyes closing as his sobs turned to hiccups, then to shaky slumbered breaths.

“Damn… I’m back here again…” You muttered as your eyes opened to the familiar white walls of the hospital room. “Wanna go home… I’m ready to go home…” And you tried to move, but a familiar, yet strangely unfamiliar pain hit your side as you tried to get up, and when you looked down, you saw the long tube protruding from your side in the exact same spot that your stitches once were. “Now what the fuck is this?”

“Ma’am…” The doctor that had been standing in your room waiting for you to wake up finally walked over and sternly motioned for you to lay down. “Do you remember me?” Of course you did, it was the same doctor that had so happily discharged you before, and you quickly nodded your head before pointing questioningly to the lung that was poking out of your lung. “Well, you went against every single rule that was written for you to follow, and you tore your stitches, every single layer, and then during your panicked hyperventilation episode, you managed to inhale a lot of blood and now it needs to be drained.”

“I’m sensing sarcasm…” You mumbled, falling back against the bed since you had no other choice but to lay there. “So how long do I have to stay this time?” You asked, and the doctor rolled his eyes at your sassiness, tapping his pen against the clipboard that he was holding.

“Considering your lack of self regard and the fact that we have to make sure your lungs are properly drained and then we have to stitch you up again… It’ll probably be a good week before you’re out of here. Now… You said that you’d have someone there who knew what was going on when you got home… Why did the person who brought you in seem so confused? Did you lie just to get out of here?”

You sheepishly scratched the back of your head and then your face crinkled up as you nodded your head. “But, I was gonna tell my boyfriend! He just got home before me and the house was kind of a mess and I completely forgot about the laundry… You know… Getting stabbed kinda makes you forget about daily chores. I tried to do the laundry when I got home and then… Bam… Stitches popped. I blame the sock.”

“The sock? You blame the sock?” The doctor repeated, completely exasperated by your sense of disconcern for what was going on. “You could have just explained to your boyfriend that… you know… you got stabbed.” He mocked you, placing his clipboard under his arm as he shook his head. “I’m gonna assume your boyfriend is the dark haired freckled boy who has been loyally sitting on the floor by your door and crying his eyes out… Does that sound like him?” You pursed your lips, nodding your head slowly. “I’m gonna let him in now, okay?”

You barely recognized him when he walked in, his head hung low and his hair curtaining his face, but when the door shut behind him, he looked up at you, his eyes immediately focusing in on the tube in your side and then he was bawling once more. “Yah, why are you crying? I’m still alive and… painfully, still breathing!” You tried to laugh, but ended up hurting yourself in the process, wincing when the vibration of your chest caused the tube to shift.

“How are you still so happy?” Felix questioned, not even coming close to your hospital bed which was actually really upsetting considering the one thing that would probably heal you better than any surgery was one of his hugs and maybe one of his kisses. “Is it the morphine? Do you not feel anything?” He looked at the IV drip that was connected to your arm and then back at your face that was smiling so brightly, he’d think that you were in any normal bed just waking up from a nap…

“No, silly… It’s because you’re here.” You simply explained, holding your arms out to him. “Where’s my hug at? I’ve waited so long for one of your hugs, and you’re just gonna stand there and stare at me?” You pouted, looking down at the tube and letting out a quick sigh, it would have been longer and way more sassy if your lungs could have handled it, but they couldn’t, so a short bit of sass was all you could give right now. “I know I look like a lab experiment right now… but… A hug would be really nice.”

“You’re like this… because of me… And you still want a hug? You still want me close to you?” He quizzed, and your eyebrows lowered as you looked at him with such shock, your eyes looking around the room before landing back on him.

“Babe, I don’t know what you’re talking about right now, I just want a hug and maybe some kisses if you feel so inclined to give me them.” You motioned your arms out to him once more, a little more forcefully this time. “I’ll let you have a couple bites of my flavorless jello if you give me a hug… Please?”

He chuckled, although it sounded way more sad than usual as he finally walked over to you, carefully maneuvering his arms around the tube as he rested his forehead against yours. “You didn’t tell me…” He murmured, pressing a kiss to your nose before pulling back. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because I knew that you’d blame yourself…” You brushed his hair away from his face before lightly poking his freckles and smiling to yourself. “You’re still doing that right now though… Which is silly. I’m the one that decided to do the laundry even though the doctor told me not to. That’s not your fault.”

“You didn’t tell me you got stabbed, angel. I wouldn’t have gotten so worked up about the house if I knew that… And you could have told me to go fuck myself after I sent that text.” He scoffed softly as he finally, carefully, sat down on the edge of the bed. “We’re suing her… The whole company is… And we’re gonna make sure you and the other girls have body guards at all times. Nothing like this will ever happen again…” He took a deep breath, and then pursed his lips apologetically as he let it out slowly through his nose and you snorted softly.

“Don’t feel guilty for being able to breathe better than me, breathe deeply for me since I can’t right now…” You joked and he rolled his eyes, his head falling back as he groaned loudly, but you could hear his laughter although he was trying his best to hide it.

“God, you really are something else…” He murmured once he had calmed down, looking over at you with the softest eyes that held the whole universe in them, although you could only see your reflection in his pupils, but to him, you were his entire universe. “They tried to send my angel back home… I’ll never let that happen… I won’t let you go. If you go, I go… I love you too much to live without you here beside me.”

You sniffled softly, biting your bottom lip to try to hide the fact that you were on the verge of tears. “Damn…” You choked out before clearing your throat. “I love you too, Lixie… Don’t make me cry though… Makes it hard to breathe…” His eyes widened, and you knew he was on the brink of beginning to apologize again, and you knew that if he did he wouldn’t stop so you cut him off before he could begin. “You think we got time for like… a quickie before the doctor comes in to check on me?”

“WHAT?!” He shrieked, his cheeks burning a bright red as he glanced at the door and then back at you. “You’re crazy… God I love you so much…” He chuckled as he shook his head, leaning in to kiss you softly as he pet his hands over your hair. “Maybe at night though… I missed you a lot… You know…”

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f4riedimples · 4 months

Text

MY COLLECTION

pairings: pimp!sam carpenter x f!reader

warnings: mentions of drugs,underage drinking,sexual harassment ,provocation dancing, prostitution

wc: 1241

a/n: hi everyone, just wanted to finally come back since I’ve only been active on wattpad recently. Hope it’s not too bad!

Oh.

this has to be the worst mistake of your life.

like your whole fucking life. You knew this was a bad idea but you loved Sam so you did it anyways. It took some time convincing but you caved.

you don’t even know why she wanted to start doing this. You were only dancing but even that made you feel a certain type of way because of the way it went.

Sam would invite people over, get them tipsy, get you and the “client” in the room, you would dance, get paid, and that was that.

you didn’t complain since it would bring in a lot of income a week.

On the fourth day you made just 950 dollars in two hours. And it just kept increasing from there. But this didn’t seem worth it anymore.

it all started just a few nights ago. Sam told you who you would take to the room and dance for and that was supposed to be it.

afterwards though you saw the creepy state the guy was giving you. After he paid all his money he tried to grab you but your waist and sit you on the bed.

you immediately got up not feeling comfortable. “No touching, nothing further.” You replied calmly before trying to move past the man and check your earnings.

The dance was quite short but he still paid around 300-400. “Take off your clothes.” He order as he looked you up and down.

you almost froze up in shock and disgust. You knew this would probably happen sooner or later. “That’s not my job.” You denied with a small bit of attitude.

“I’ll give you five dollars, just take your clothes off and fuck me!” He demanded impatiently assuming your it was part of your job or you should go further instead of just selling the fantasy.

“sir, like I said, that’s not my goddamn job.” You didn’t want to raise your voice since this wasn’t a regular. You never know what this man could pull out of do.

Things were getting too intense too fast and you just needed it to stop. As the man tried to get near you again you just wanted to grab the knife hidden in one of the drawers.

just as he was about to reach you, you heard a small bang on the door. “Open. Now.” It was Sam. It was Sam! You immediately ran to the door and unlocked it.

just so no one could sneak in and try to get a free dance with friends, it was a responsibility to lock the door.

Sam immediately came in and glared at the man. “What the hell happened?” She asked already seething. She had heard some of this from outside of the door.

“she won’t fuck me.” The man tried to stay confident even though he knew Sam would be pissed off.

“asshole, she’s a dancer, not sex worker.” Sam hissed before guiding you behind her. It made you feel a bit safer knowing Sam had did something and was here to help you now.

“get out.” Sam said and the man had no choice but to leave. After this Sam immediately stopped the party and everyone went home.

she sat you on the bed and lightly caressed your cheek with her thumb. “princesa, I’m so sorry. Did he hurt you?” Sam asked feeling guilty.

you shook your head only feeling a bit shook up. “No, he didn’t. Thanks for saving me.” You whispered a bit down by the experience.

“There’s no need to thank me. I’ll always protect you from weirdos like that.” She spoke softly before hugging you. You couldn’t help but tear up.

now however you were worried things would be different.

it had been around a month since the whole incident and you were Sam were out on a date. Sam had brought up the idea of bringing in another girl which made you feel a bit jealous.

you never knew if Sam could try to find interest in a new girl. Even though you knew she was joking you couldn’t shake off another feeling you had towards the idea. Fear. Or maybe guilt.

You knew Sam would probably bring in another really young girl desperate for money who wouldn’t know how dangerous this was until it was too late. You couldn’t imagine what could happen.

you couldn’t imagine someone else go through what you did or worse while you stand by participating.

that’s why you had to tell Sam what was on your mind. “Hey Sam? We need to talk about something serious.” you were gonna be open and hope for the better.

Sam immediately got serious and paid close attention. She stare at you still with her usual caring eyes as she waited for you to speak.

“I don’t think I wanna do this. Not anymore or ever again. This whole pimp and dancer thing is just not for me.” Even before you had agreed to do this you knew that even actual strippers or dancers can usually be followed home or harassed by creepy guys.

you knew that some men and other woman felt entitled to seeing more even if that wasn’t on the fine print.

Sam took a tense breath before shooting back. “Are you serious? Like- are you sure that you wanna do this?” Sam was cautious and hesitant not wanting to seem insensitive. She also knew this could lead to lots of troubles.

she tried to respect you and what you wanted. She tried not to be so blinded by the money. At the end of the day you were still her girlfriend.

“yes.” Your voice was soft and you almost felt bad. You didn’t want to disappoint Sam but you also wanted to put yourself first.

“then okay. That’s how it’ll go. I’m just surprised because you seemed to enjoy it especially when the nights were late.” Something about Sam’s last sentence caught you off guard.

on late nights you would decide to get a little extra tipsy to loosen up your nerves but not because you wanted to do more with these clients. “Excuse me?”

“you just seemed to really like it. You never complained.” Sam spoke a bit more quietly as if she was nervous to say. She started to realize maybe this wasn’t the best idea.

“you’re the one who asked me to do this. I could’ve said no but I didn’t because ends needed to be met and I loved you.” Sam was the one who had offered you this after seeing you give her a lap dance.

she realized how good you were naturally and decided that maybe she shouldn’t “let your talent go to waste”.

before this you never consider Sam would ever even have an idea like this. She would tell you how you would deserve the best but right now it didn’t feel the same.

You’ve been dating each other for around a year and known each other for way longer. how could this be your girlfriend.

“I know. And I’m sorry. I was selfish and was desperate to pay the rent and the bills and get more than cheap food.” You let out a soft breath as your nerves temporarily calmed down.

you reached out and held Sam’s hand. “And I forgive you.” You smiled sweetly before pressing a soft kiss against Sam’s lips.

but will things fall back in place?

#sam carpenter #sam carpenter x reader #scream x reader #scream vi #scream 5 #sidney prescott #kirby reed #amber freeman #melissa barrera x reader #samantha carpenter x reader #sam carpenter x female reader

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fillinforlater · 5 months

Text

Blonde: Chapter III

Female Reader x Kim Gaeul

Length: 2500 words

Tags: angst/fluff, another bad day, losing your dignity, illness, someone who cares, there is a fever dream, Gaeul's relationship, struggling with your identity, we got a twist at the end

Inspiration: "Why Am I Like This?" by Orla Gartland

(A/N: Finally, another chapter to this slowly developing plot. I jope you enjoy it. @firagaarmor for obvious reasons)

"Didn't you say 108,000?"

"No, sir, it's 180,500 won."

"Oh, I see."

The old, fragile fingers of this confused, bald man creep back into his purse, trying to find another bill in what is probably a maze of money and plastic cards for him. You wouldn’t mind it one bit, you get paid either way and on usual nights, traffic is so little that barely anyone else gets inconvenienced. However, tonight is rather unusual. Apparently everyone forgot something and is now in a haste to buy said something. There is a long line of impatient stressed moms, annoyed teenagers and everything in between or beyond showing or voicing their disapproval.

It’s not you, you’re not the cause for their stress and discomfort, yet the customer’s toxicity still flies to you like you’re some kind of magnet. It all comes back to stab you, with passive-aggressive remarks or the glances up and down your small frame. Doesn’t really help that you only had cold ramen noodles, sweets and a little bit of bread in the past five days and that the ice cold showers make your nose itch with an impending cold. God, you must look pathetically miserable, even for your standards.

After the man finally gets his cash together, the checkouts are fast, heartless, and your heart aches for her to be at the end of the line. Gaeul—with her bright hair and even brighter smile to greet you when she is out buying drinks again—she could really save this evening. You yearn for her encouragement and presence more than for the next hot meal. Maybe even more than for the next two hot meals.

But there is no blonde angel to save you tonight. With the last customer buying their groceries, the lights die one by one, leaving you in a mostly empty store, alone with thousands and thousands of tasty and not-so-tasty products you’d love to put into a pan and fry. The thuds of your sneakers on the floor almost drown out the grumble in your stomach or the sniffling of your nose as you walk into yet another cold night with nothing to look forward to.

I fucking hate this shit.

You want to vomit, throw yourself off your bed, tear every single strand of your dark hair out as you dial your mother's number again. You hope it’s over quickly, but one can never know with her, especially if she still stubbornly refuses to help you. Take deep breaths, try to keep your head straight though thinking has become more and more exhaustive with every calorie you’re missing.

“What is it?” your mother groans, though you find her tone to be a lot more amused than last time. Someone is cheering and laughing in the background, drowning out even the loud TV.

“The bills, mom. I still have no electricity, no hot water, no heater.”

“Oh right.”

A response colder than your room. You try to straighten your back to speak to her loud and clear, with at least some authority, but you feel yourself crumble when the clanking of bottles loudly booms through the speaker.

“Did… did your boss finally pay you?” you carefully ask, earning an immediate response.

“Yes, he did.”

“Then why didn’t you pay the bills?”

Silence, except for the crime drama running in the back, finding all the suspects and then the killer, as they always do. This case right here is totally clear, no one needs to investigate for more than five minutes to find out that she is at fault, yet it feels like you're on trial, awaiting your parole, which for some reason is still in the balance.

“You know, sweetheart,” your mother cheekily responds, her saliva loudly flopping around in her mouth, mixed with the disgusting flavor of cigarettes and beer. “I really worked hard for that money. It’s my money. In the end I can decide what happens with it.”

Oh God, don’t do that, please for the love of—and don’t call me sweetheart.

“You can’t be serious,” you barely chirp out, your heart throbbing, crumbling like your entire body as you can see your entire foundation, the fragile remains of your fake stability finally falter. You can never cover all of your expenses with this one job and you can’t quit school now, not after getting so close to finally finishing it. You need her money and she seems to finally use it against you.

“It’s just the truth,” she responds nonchalantly, her voice a lot lighter and higher in pitch than usual. You hear someone cackle in the background.

“Sweetheart.

Don’t call me that.

“How about you—

Don’t do this.

“—start begging for my money. C’mon! Get on your knees and beg for it! I’m tired of funding your lazy, incompetent lifestyle. You should be so grateful for my throwing money at you all these years.

“I didn’t hear you! Get your lazy ass out of your bed now, and on your damn knees.

“Beg for it.”

Laughter from behind her. It's not the TV.

A hot shower, warm noodles, a cozy bed—they never felt so wrong, so disgusting. Even as your life objectively improves, it feels horrible, like you had to sell yourself and your soul for it to happen.

Your knees are still drawn to the floor. You might sit in a chair, listen to teachers all day or sit at the checkout, pulling items over the scanner, your knees still feel like they should get on the floor and beg.

Please let me pass.

Please give me more money.

Please leave me alone.

Please ignore my embarrassing existence.

"Hey."

"Uhhh, good evening, ma'a—Gaeul?"

Gaeul's dainty fingers catch your shoulders as you slump forward, against the checkout counter and almost fold over. Your body, devoid of energy, loses all tension.

“Hey, hey,” Gaeul calls out to you, and like the caring mother you never had, the warm palm of her hand cups your forehead. “Oh lord, you’re so hot! You’re definitely sick, what are you doing here?”

“I-I have to work,” you respond, a wave of something hot and heavy pressing down on your brain. This lava burns itself into you and makes every thought process excruciatingly hard. You haven’t even noticed it until now. “I’m not sick, every-thing is fine.”

Your smile is weak, dozy and fake, it cannot fool Gaeul a bit. Her beautiful face falls into deep wrinkles of worry as you can barely lift yourself out of her supporting arms. There is an awkward pause between the two of you, only interrupted by another customer clearing their throat. You try to get back to scanning, but one of Gaeul’s cans slips through your fingers a couple of times.

“I don’t think you should do this,” Gaeul says quietly, softly. “You don’t need to prove your toughness, it’s okay to be sick for a few days. I think your boss will understand.”

“Really, Gaeul, I’m okay.” The final can, straight into the blonde’s bag. Through your blurry eyes you can barely make out the color of her jacket, or sweater, or whatever it is—either way, it definitely suits her. “Thanks for worrying though.”

Why did I push her away like this? Why didn’t I listen to her? Why am I always like this?

Everything is hot and everything is cold. You need another jacket or the cold will get worse, but it simultaneously feels like you could die from overheating if you don’t start throwing away layer after layer of clothes. The way your body feels is close to how the inner mechanisms in your brain work in this fever haze. There is nothing, no thought, no conclusion, nothing that matters—yet everything is suddenly relevant.

Objects and details you’ve never actively released before come into focus of your decreasing sight, that one tile in the corner, just as dirty and unspecial as the rest, the second package of gum, purple and pink, the spooky hum when the door opens that never appears when it closes. So you stumble out of the store, tripping over your feet until the fever finally strikes you down.

The concrete, its gray color, is darker the colder it gets. It’s also harder, torturous to lay upon, scorching hot skin on freezing tarmac. Suddenly, brand new sneakers, black and white, small feet, about as small as your own, though they could be—

“Oh my God!”

—a bit bigger, judging by the length of the stockings covered legs that—

“Here, I’ll help you”

—disappear in a plaid skirt, above a combo of thick winter jacket and—

“I knew this was bad. Taxi!”

—a girl, whose hair is both silver and golden, a blonde close to whiteness, nonetheless it looks like a crown adorning and framing her perfectly formed features.

Gaeul.

You’re lost in a dream. A school full of students, their ages varying drastically and you do not recognize a single face. The teachers seem a lot more familiar, though they float through the room carelessly, gravity not applying to them. In fact, gravity only applies to you, as the rest of the students fly around the room with their chairs and desks.

A frame of an angel, her hands brushing your cheek, scorching hot, so she puts a wet towel on your face. That’s so nice of her, you must be sick. Sick or not, you cannot miss the day you go to the zoo with the floating class.

The zoo is filled with people, nothing but people. People that look at odd people. Those that have to stand on one leg, those that can’t talk properly, those who like weird things. You can hear your whole class laugh hysterically at all of them, so weird, so wrong, nothing better than to laugh at sickos and be glad that you’re not one of them.

“Uhm, hi.” A voice in the far background, damp, behind a shut door. “Care to explain why you have another girl in your bed?”

You feel like you have to explain yourself, but words are nothing more than concepts in your head, also the zoo is calling, you have to watch the lively corpses float through the water tanks. Luckily, someone speaks for you. The angel.

“She’s a friend and she is sick. That’s all there is to it, Yujin.”

"Oh, really?" The other voice is skeptical, eyebrows raised and she looks for a clever response. “I guess she got sick while laying in your bed? Gaeul, don’t lie to me, okay? Just be straightforward with me.”

“I—” the angel stutters and falls silent. You however found a new enclosure in this zoo which stretches in all directions. This one is rather empty and the enclosure is also no enclosure, just a mirror with a writing above it: ‘Sicko girls that like other girls’.

The reflection is you, of course, in all your—

“What am I going to do with you, hm?” The other voice, now a tall woman of incredible beauty, twirls a couple of golden strands of the angel and tugs them behind her ear with a weak—dishonest, you feel—smile. “The long hair suited you better. I really liked that.”

“I know, Yujin.”

The reflection is you, in all your fault and imperfection, far from perfection and any heavenly being. You are no angel, just a sicko girl that likes girls—and the whole class is laughing.

You open your eyes, but the aching, hot pain in your temple and a heavy, wet towel on top of it make actually seeing, realizing anything a pain in the ass. Just the outline of a small face looking down on you, very familiar, very pretty—oh, what a relief to have Gaeul be the first thing you see.

“Wh-where am I?” you ask past dry lips.

“Oh, you’re awake.” Gaeul turns around and quickly reaches for a bottle of water. “Here, drink this, your body needs a lot of water now. You’re in my—my friend's apartment.”

“Damn, then it must have been real fucking bad—”

You cover your mouth, realizing your loud curse in a foreign room, foreign bed, where are your manners, they might have foreign customs. Gaeul’s eyes fall shut when she begins to lightly chuckle.

“Don’t worry, she’s not here right now,” Gaeul says. “You’re all good. B-but you can’t stay here forever. Just rest up and—you have somewhere to stay, right?”

You carefully remove the towel from your face, catching all the drops running down your forehead as you think about home, your home, finally warm because you threw away your dignity. You’d love to not go there, tear up the contract for rent and run away to something new—into independence.

“Yeah, yup, I—I have a place, don’t worry. Sorry for all the trouble, fuck, I don’t even remember what—I did it again.”

Now Gaeul is holding her stomach, laughing, hitting the blanket that covers your legs and you join her. Though you might sit upright, you feel like falling over, the dizziness, Gaeul’s laugh, they make you feel like you’re still in that dream with the angel. The angel, so ethereal, but made fragile by this voice. A woman.

Suddenly, yours and Gaeul’s face are almost touching, her arms are on your shoulders, yours on her side, her petite frame is in your palm. The laughs have faded, smiles remain but you feel your heart racing. The smile fades and you’re tense. Gaeul is right there and she is so, so pretty.

“You sure you’re alright?” Gaeul asks as she sees your blush. You blush even more and avert your eyes.

“Y-yeah, thank you. You helped a lot. But—

“—are you okay too, Gaeul?”

That’s a smile full of uncertainty, a hint of anger, a glow of hurt. Gaeul’s eyes sparkle and you’d love to blow some life into them. Even better, all the love you have for her, you want to pour it into her and give her power. But no, you have no idea nor any plan to do such a thing. So it’s Gaeul who helps you out of the bed and hands you one of her sweatshirts that isn’t drenched in sweat.

“You are the one with a fever, I’m as healthy as ever!” Gaeul is so bright and her smile shines like a star. In a different universe, she is already a celebrity with a perfect red carpet smile. Fake.

“I didn’t mean that.” In a surge of confidence and worry, you reach for Gaeul’s hand and everything's in slow motion. “I-I’m scared that you’re not happy, that something isn’t right, that—Gaeul, I heard you talk to your friend and she seemed—”

“Look, I—she isn’t my friend.”

Gaeul looks at you.

“She is my girlfriend.”

Gaeul still looks at you. Now it’s your turn to fake a smile and get it over with.

...

(A/N2: Thanks for reading! Stay tuned for more chapters, though it will take time until the next release)

#kpop fluff #gaeul fluff #ive fluff #female idol fluff #female reader #female reader fluff #kpop angst #gaeul angst #ive angst

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oleander-nin · 4 months

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Vampire ROTTMNT Headcanons

A/N, not important: You're probably thinking "Ollie, this is so short and wonky? What gives?" And to that, I say: I didn't know whether to make it old timey, how they became vamps, etc, so I'm going with this version for the normal rise, and a Victorian version for the Yan and I'll just bounce them around sometimes whenever I revisit this trope. I have how I want vampires to act, just not sure how/when I want the rise boys to be vamps. Feel free to ask questions if you need clarification or want a certain thing answered. Any criticism is welcome, constructive or not. This is supposed to be a gender neutral reader, so if I screwed up somewhere, please tell me.

-Ollie

CW: Blood drives, mention of needles, blood, being bitten, animal deaths mentioned, vampires

Words: 2127

Summary: My Basic Vampire ROTTMNT Headcanons

Tag list: @f1oricide

They all got infected/turned after being bit by a vampire bat mutant.

Mikey:

Mikey has the longest canines of his brothers, something that causes him to avoid feeding on living things as much as he can. He tried once and felt awful for the cries it made, so he usually goes out and tries to find newly deceased animals, or steals from a butcher. Will also kill animals if he has to. His longer canines also make it harder for him to hide his ‘condition’, but he’ll usually brush accusations off with comments of genetics or his mutation.

Constantly bites his lips while talking, the long fangs getting in his way. He basically has to relearn how to enunciate his words due to them. He gets easily frustrated by his inability to speak well, and gets irritated easier because he can’t explain why he’s feeling upset.

He’s able to adjust to most of the new abilities fairly easily, as all of them are already incredibly strong and fast due to their mutation. The night vision and sensitivity to light, however, excites him. He’s content to wear sunglasses during the day if they need to go out, and the ability to see better in the dark makes their night missions a lot easier. Plus, he’s now able to stay up all night painting without alerting his brothers to him being up so late.

Absolutely despises that he basically can’t cook anymore. He still makes food for his father, but he can’t even touch half the best ingredients without gagging anymore. Food smells rancid at best, and tastes thick and unsavory no matter how much he tries to fix it.

He’s always trying to snuggle up with you now, his skin constantly cold from the lack of circulation. He likes to latch onto you and bury his face into your stomach, trying to pretend he’s still alive and well.

He likes to bite the deltoid of your shoulder the most because he can hug you close while he does it, but still drape himself over you. You’re the only human blood he usually gets, but he only does it when you offer it first. He doesn’t want to accidentally pressure you into letting him feed off you if you’re not comfortable with it.

Hates to think that he won’t age with you. As he starts to grow faster than normal via the virus, he’s constantly having growing pains and this causes him to come to you for comfort more. He doesn’t like that he’s basically shooting into adulthood, and since none of them have experienced it before, they aren’t sure when it will stop. When it peaks when they seem to be in their mid twenties, Mikey just feels sad. You may not have aged a decade in a year, but your aging never stops. He’s terrified to watch your years pass by without him.

Donnie:

Donnie has the shortest canines, which causes him to look the most ‘normal’ to his original self. He prefers to have human blood, solely taste wise, but usually has SHELLDON get it for him rather than hunting himself because he hates drinking straight from the source. He transfers it into bottles or bags so he can save it and stock up. He avoids drinking from animals mainly because he doesn’t trust them to have parasites or rabies, and while he isn’t happy about drinking from random humans, he can at least hack into their medical records first. Donnie chooses his blood incredibly carefully.

You and April(if she lets him) are the only people he’ll feed on directly. If April lets him, he’ll usually do it like a blood drive and just take a small bit of her blood into a blood bag. For you, it depends. If you’re scared of needles, he’ll just do it the ‘normal’ way, but if not, he’ll let you choose to get it done via blood collection. Where he likes to bite depends on his mood. Sometimes the neck is easiest because you’re just right there and he hasn’t eaten in hours. Sometimes the lower shoulder or the wrist is better because you’re both just trying to get it over with.

He keeps a journal of all the changes that happen to him and his brothers, wanting to keep a list in case they come across someone else it happens to. Their entire mutation/transition is well documented so he doesn’t forget what it was like when it first happened.

It takes him a hot minute to get used to his new heightened senses. His least favorite is his sensitive smell, as anytime he goes near something pungent, he feels physically ill. It takes him a while to go back to the junkyard, the rust and oil making his head spin until he adjusts. He adds stronger noise dampeners to his goggle headset to block out unwanted noise when he needs silence.

He’s constantly complaining of his growing cramps, using you as a pillow more and more now that his hands are stiff from both working and from growing. His mood sours for a long time due to the countless changes he doesn’t want. The only good thing he seems to find from it is that being a vampire will improve his ‘bad boy image’. He completely negates this by curling into you after his legs cramp up and ends up cuddling you for hours.

As soon as he realizes that he will outlive you by a longshot, he tries to find a way to either elongate your life, or shorten his. He refuses to let you leave him. While he’s excited for many years to practice science, the thought of losing you terrifies him, especially since he thought he’d die with you, rather than live on for a millennia afterwards.

Raph:

Is already used to the fangs due to his snaggle tooth. While everyone else is accidentally biting their own lips and tripping over their tongue, he’s able to navigate the new longer teeth fairly easily. He still accidentally bites his tongue a couple of times, but less so than his brothers.

Hates to bite others, and usually feeds on animals. He doesn’t want to be seen as a monster any more than he knows he would already be considered. He avoids feeding for as long as he can, and even tried to continue eating ‘normal’ food for a while, until they all realized it gave them net zero nutrition so they couldn’t survive off it. He eventually gets more used to it and starts eating what he should, but for the first few months he feels incredibly guilty and tries to only eat enough to last a couple hours.

Raph tells you of his new ‘infection’ immediately. He doesn’t want you to figure out accidentally by catching him drinking blood or something.

While he hates biting you, his favorite place to is your shoulder. He likes to have you cuddle into him with your back against his chest so he can just bury his snout into the crook of your neck. The first time he bit you was an accident while he was asleep, and since he wasn’t eating as much as he was supposed to, he bit you while you both were cuddling. He woke up pretty quickly and pulled back, feeling awful about it. His kisses were solely light and soft weeks after that because he was worried he’d accidentally cut you again.

Raph’s more careful around you now, trying to adjust to the nearly doubled strength he now has. He’s clumsy and big, so even when he didn’t have vampire strength, he had to learn to watch out and not play rough with you like he would his brothers. It’s like he has his ninpo powered on all the time now, so it takes him a while to make the adjustment. You gain a few new bruises and countless apologies before he finally gets the hang of it.

His new growth doesn’t help with his clumsiness, especially since he’s shooting up nearly two feet in a year. He’s always sore, so he carries you around like a teddy bear to keep him company. He refuses to think of you growing old without him, refuses to remind himself that as your body starts to wear down, he stays frozen in time.

The one thing he likes about being a vampire is his heightened senses. He always knows where you are, and he doesn’t even have to turn on the light at night to make sure you’re safe. He can see you curled up on the couch or on his bed without disturbing you, and it shortly makes up for the other horrors he goes through in his transformation.

Leo:

Least caring about his new fangs. He thinks they’re cool, constantly teasing others and you by baring his fangs and bringing his hands up in mock claws while hissing. For a while, he goes full into the vampire getup, trying to talk in an accent, saying “bleh bleh bleh” after every sentence, just as much as he can to try and make his new condition unserious. He wants to pretend it’s something fun and not that he’s basically no longer alive

His favorite place to bite is your wrist. He thinks it’s hilarious to bow and grasp your hand as if he’s going to kiss your knuckles, only to flip your arm and sink his teeth into your upper forearm or wrist. Even when he’s not being goofy with it, he still chooses your wrist because he feels he can control it better. If something happens, it’s much easier for you to push him off when he’s holding onto your wrist then biting into your neck. He knows he won’t hurt you, but he’s afraid he might start to drain you, and doesn’t want that to happen.

Leo uses his new powers to show off, creeping up on you in the dark and making jumps he couldn’t make before. He knows he’s stuck like this now and just wants to make the best of it. Sure, he knows it sucks, but goofing around to make his brothers feel better too always makes it a little bit easier.

He tries to ignore the fact he’ll outlive you, passing it off with jokes about him being a trophy husband because he’ll always look young. He’ll hold you close if you ever start to get sad about it, quietly reminding you that you’re not going to die anytime soon, and he’ll be with you for your entire life.

Constantly whines about the growing pains and cramps, using it to bribe you into longer cuddles. He’ll teleport to your side so he doesn’t have to move and just collapse into you. He just wants you near while the aches settle into his bones.

Basic Vampire functions via Draxum mutation:

(sorry it's so jumbled. I hope it all makes sense, ask me if you have questions)

Heightened senses, including eyesight, strength, speed, hearing, and smell. The strengthened eyesight is more sensitive to light, which makes bright lights uncomfortable. They can still be in the sun, just can’t see well due to it which makes being out during the day unappealing to them. Can’t spread being a vampire via a bite(has to be from the original mutant or the string of mutagen). Can only consume blood, although it can be the blood of any organism. Their bite produces a numbing agent(much like a mosquito) so you can’t feel the initial prick or suck. Once the agent wears off, it’s much like the ache of a shot. They must be decapitated to be stopped. Cannot shapeshift nor fly. Common myths(ie: can’t enter a house w/out permission, garlic repulsed, no reflection, etc) don’t apply. They are put off by garlic, but mostly because of its strong, pungent smell, but can’t be stopped by it. They get the same reaction from onions and strong scented flowers. For them, eating normal food is the equivalent of us eating grass. It’ll fill you up, but you can’t digest it or take any nutritional value from it and you’ll probably get sick. The only problem is it both tastes and smells awful. Vampires are immune to any bloodborne diseases. Becoming a vampire starts to change your body into what would pretty much be your best years. Within a year, you would either advance or regress into the physical stature of a fit 25 year old on steroids. If you’re older and your back has started to give out and hunch, you’d regain your height and your muscle mass would be fixed. You’d be stuck as a young adult. Vampires have fast regeneration, and while they can’t regrow lost limbs, a major stab wound can heal in just hours.

Sources:

Used for biological explanations and for reminders of the different bodily changes in vampires

Used for basic history, descriptions, and a characteristics

Blood consumption after death

More history/characteristics

Vampire lore by region

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fictoculus · 9 months

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౨ৎ they're crying, but why?

send a request!┊masterlist┊taglist applications

FEAT... cyno, venti (w/ diluc), gorou

A/N... aaand the results are in! this is the result of the poll i posted yesterday, thank you to everyone who submitted their vote ♡ (sorry these got a bit long! i got a bit carried away...)

WARNINGS... death/injury (gorou), mentions of alcohol/drinking (venti)

✧ cyno.

when you really put some thought into it, you don't think you've ever actually seen cyno cry. he is quite a solitary person, after all, and tends to take matters into his own hands; hating when other people get involved in his problems, especially those most dear to him.

being general mahamatra comes with a lot of responsibilty, and it's only reasonable for things to become stressful from time to time, maybe even too much too handle. that's why when you come home to a seemingly empty house, the snack you left for him on the kitchen table remaining untouched, you begin to worry. cyno has plenty of unhealthy habits, one of which being avoiding food when mentally conflicted, convinced that it acts as a catalyst to his emotions.

your first thought is to check the bedroom, expecting your beloved to be lying in bed, hopefully asleep and not silently shedding tears. however, as you near the doorway, you soon notice that the door is open... cyno never leaves the door open.

"love? are you home?"

you call out, half expecting a response, yet one was not given. instead, you were met by an eerie silence...

"where in teyvat is he?!"

you searched high and low but to no avail, you're beloved was nowhere to be seen; it was like the two of you were running in circles. little did you know, he was searching for you too...

normally, cyno would seek a quiet, secluded place to be alone with his thoughts, desperately trying to come up with a solution but his mind often wanders off to you; how you would deal with the situation, how he would manage it if it were you feeling this way. sometimes it works, other times it's completely and utterly useless; he fails to picture someone as kind-hearted and loving as you committing such violent deeds. he imagines your warmth, how gentle you are with him, how soft yet meaningful your kisses are, and finally comes to the realisation: the last thing he wants is to be alone. it had all become too much for him to handle by himself, and as guilty a he'd feel dumping it all on you, it felt as if he had no other choice.

at this point, you're breaking into a sprint, the daunting realisation that the sun was beginning to set urging you to go onwards. the thought of cyno being alone in the desert at night sent chills down your spine, even though you knew he could probably handle himself.

you pass by villagers, adventurers, and even narrowly avoid a group of hermits, all but one of them fast asleep around a campfire. a flaming ache shoots down your legs, only causing you to become more desperate as you throw your head from side to side, scouring your surroundings for any signs of him. you stop in your tracks, frozen as a silohuette in the distance catches your eye. it has ears, just like cyno's, pointing up to the sky, and you're convinced it's him. you feel your heart pounding in your chest, whether it be from the running or from nervousness you didn't know but in tha-

[THUD!]

all of a sudden, you're sent toppling to the ground, a figure falling right ontop of you, but managing to catch themselves with their hands, placed on either side of your head.

"what the..."

they had ears, just like cyno's, pointing up to the sky... was it the silohuette from earlier? it can't be, they must've been a mile away.. then who on teyvat is it?!

"cyno?!"

relief washes over you as you pull him down ontop of you, wrapping him in a tight embrace. he squirms at first, puzzled as to why a stranger was holding onto him so tightly. only when he realises its you underneath him does he finally loosen up, letting your comforting warmth envelop him and save him from the harsh cold of the desert's night.

you kiss his forehead lovingly before slowly repositioning the two of you so that he's sat upright on your lap, your back pressed against the cold cliff face behind you. it felt... strange having him on top of you like this, it wasn't often you in control, and you'd never imagined cyno of all people being on your lap, or anyone's lap for that matter. his eyes lock with yours and he immediately breaks, his eyes welling up as he crashes onto you, wrapping his arms securely around your waist and hiding his face in the crook of your neck. he cries. he cries and cries and cries, but you remain patient with him; rubbing his back slowly and shushing him every so often.

"you're ok... shhh, you're alright. i love you, cyno, and i'll always be right by your side, no matter what"

"even when i hurt innocent people?"

you're taken aback by this statement. never in your life had anyone challenged cyno's judgment, and the last person you thought you'd hear it from was the man himself.

"you don't, love... those people deserved their punishment, don't doubt your judgement"

you feel him shift, pulling his away from your shoulder, his face mere inches from yours.

"i love you..."

he murmers, letting out a shakey breath, the warm air hitting your face and bringing a soft, rosey tint to your cheeks.

"i love you too"

you close the gap, kissing him tenderly, conveying everything you feel for him in that intimate moment, showing him how much you love him, how much you care...

✧ venti.

at first, you think venti is drunk, slumped over the bar in angel's share, seemingly groggy and, honestly, looking absolutely exhausted (but cute nontheless). you admire him from afar, taking in how his cape wraps around his figure perfectly.

"ah, [name], i was wondering when you'd turn up"

diluc, the owner of the tavern, has quite the tough exterior, though once you get to know him, his wall begins to crack, revealing his slightly softer interior.

you sigh; yes, you're used to picking venti up from the tavern by now, but you wished he could at least be a bit more responsible for things like his tab.

"don't worry, i'll pay"

approaching the two of them, you reach into your pocket, feeling around for your bag of mora, only to be interrupted by diluc's monotonous yet somehow expressive voice.

"he hasn't had anything"

even diluc seems surprised, causing you stop in your tracks; he hasn't been drinking? the feeling of disappointment quickly leaves you and is instantaneously replaced by a feeling of pure concern. your lover, still lying on the counter, is yet to even move since you walked in, and didn't respond when the redhead called his name. instinctively, you place your hand on his shoulder, gently shaking him, urging him to get up.

"love?"

he doesn't respond, you and diluc sharing a look; you can tell from his eyes that does, in fact, care for venti. your eyebrows furrow as you stop shaking him and rest your hand on his back, only to realise he is still trembling. as quietly as you can, you pull up a stool and take a seat next to him, diluc taking this as his hint to leave and wondering into the storage room.

all it takes is a few sniffles for you to realise exactly what was going on.

"darling... venti, look at me"

reaching out your hand to hold his, your realise how sweaty his palms are, pulling them away from his face to reveal his puffy, red eyes staring up at you, though he quickly diverts his gaze once the two of you make eye contact. in that exact moment, you can feel your heart breaking, each tear rolling down his cheek forming a new crack. without hesitation, you hug him. it's an awkward hug, his upper half still resting on the counter, your right arm reaching over his back and rubbing his shoulder, your left snaking around his waist and pulling him closer.

"this isn't very comfortable..."

you chuckle, even through sadness, venti's... strong personality never fails to show through. his breath hitches every so often as he tries to hold back his sobs, but, archons, was it good to hear his voice again, no matter how broken it may sound. you feel him shift under your arms and so you remove them from around him, allowing him the capacity to move into a more comfortable position; which happened to be lifting you up and pulling you onto his lap, the small of your back pressed against the edge of the counter.

"what's got you so down in the dumps, hm?"

you question, reaching up a hand to tilt his chin up while the other ruffles his hair. he doesn't respond, but instead pulls his face away from your touch and buries it in your chest, finding the rise and fall of your breathing comforting. you both just sit in silence, appreciating eachother's presence more than anything. still in venti's arms, you reach into your bag and grab a notepad and pen, scribbling down a note, thanking diluc for letting your partner stay and watching over him. venti simply watches, slightly confused when you leave a scrappy looking piece of paper on the stool next to you... that is until he reads "dear diluc", and everything seems to click.

venti never does explain what had upset him so much, but you trust him; you trust that when he needs you, he'll come find you, for you can hide from many things, but never the wind...

(unbeknownst to the two of you, diluc had been listening in to your conversation the entire time, a foreign sense of worry prevented him from leaving, curious to know what had gotten his most loyal patron friend in such a state...)

✧ gorou.

gorou doesn't know how long he's been stood at the front door, trembling as waves upon waves of guilt flood over him. an impossible challenge had approached him, one he could never have been prepared for.

it was an ambush.

manslaughter. hundreds of his men, brave warriors, slain. defeated. gone. the hope he had, the passion, dissapated within an instant, crashing to the ground just like him when he heard the news. he fell silent, but kokomi could tell by the way he slumped over that his heart shattered. she told him not to lose hope, that the resistance still has a chance of overpowering the vision hunt decree, but that isn't what got him on his knees. he wasn't there. he couldn't save them. it was his fault.

he wondered for hours, aimlessly following paths but straying off them once he neared the home of a fallen soldier. somehow, as if by miracle, he found himself at the front door of your shared home, hours after his usual return, leaving you worried sick. weakly, he lifted his hand and rested it on the door handle, but he couldn't bring himself to walk in... he was ashamed. hundreds of his men died on his watch, how could he possibly return home carrying that on his shoulders? it must've been 20 minutes after he arrived before you finally decided to go out looking for him, despite him making you promise that you'd never go searching for him if he didn't return home; how could you not knowing your beloved could be in danger?

"gorou? archons, i was worried sick! how long have you been standing out here its so- cold... love?"

you practically exploded on him, not giving him a chance to speak, which in some ways he is grateful for, the last thing he wanted was to have to confess. so instead he just stood there, motionless, his feet stiff on the ground, as if held in place by glue. he couldn't bare to look you in the eye, avoiding your gaze at all costs.

"sweetheart... please look at me? did something happen? are you hurt?"

scanning him over, you see no signs of external injury, but you notice how he's gently shaking, his hands fidgeting with the tip of his tail which seemed slightly damp. immediatey you knew; he'd been crying. what for, you don't know, but in that moment, you didn't need to.

you know gorou well enough to have memorised his habits, one of which being him cuddling his tail when he cries, especially when you're not there to hold and console him. how do you know this? you've walked in on him before; hidden under the covers and whimpering softly as he tried his best to muffle his cries.

seeing him upset is like a dagger to the heart, and you can't stand watching him fall apart right in front of you.

"let's get you inside, hm?"

he nods meekly, forcing a smile as he steps past you and into the warmth, instantly feeling a sense of comfort at the familiar smells and sensations of your home.

you have your back turned from him, purposefully taking longer than usual to lock the door, trying to come up with a way to cheer up your partner.

the very instant you turned back around to face him, solid plan in mid, he crashes into your arms, desperately clawing at the back of your shirt, searching for something to ground himself. you feel his face nuzzle into your chest, his tears wetting your shirt, but you didn't mind. infact, you opted to bring him even closer, your hand at the back of his head, tangling your fingers in his hair and gently scratching his scalp.

"i- i'm sorry..."

his voice wavered, as if he forced the words out. he breaks down after his apology, knowing just how the hard the news was going to hit you.

"don't apologise, dear, i'm just glad you're back with me, safe and sound"

you squeeze him tighter, wanting to pull him in even more, but knowing he could only be so close until he literally couldn't breathe. once the trembling stops, and his sobs turn to sniffles, you pull away, moving your hands to cup his cheeks and tilt his head to face yours. smiling, you lean down ever so slightly and plant a soft kiss on the tip of his nose.

"now, let's get a warm cup of tea and you can tell me all about it, ok? i'll fix you up a little something to eat too"

hand in hand, the two of you relocate to the kitchen, gorou sat timidly at the table whilst you prepare him some tricolour dango. you both take deep breaths together before he slowly guides you through his day, attempting to explain what had happened. his nerves were spiking, knowing you'd be distraught at what had happened on the battlefield, scared that you'd become angry at him and tell him he's to blame.

to say you were heartbroken was an understatement, some of those who were lost were friends of yours, that was a fact that couldn't be dismissed, and so you did shed a few tears; but you would never blame any of it on gorou.

over the course of the next couple hours, you cried together, you laughed together, you ate together, only to cry once more, but you found comfort in doing it together. rising from your seat to get a glass of water, you catch sight of the time, letting gorou know and suggesting the pair of you head to bed. you tell him to go ahead and get comfortable while you stay and clean the dishes, giving him a few minutes to recollect his thoughts and calm himself down.

the two of you stay in bed from that point onwards, holding each other close, reminiscing on the memories you had shared with those who had unfortunately passed; you knew it was hard for him to talk about such things, and it was hard for you too, but if not now, when? there were moments where he'd begin to tear up again, but you'd be there to calm him, rubbing his back and whispering sweet nothings in his ear...

thanks for reading ♡ want to read more? my requests are OPEN, so please feel free to let me know what you'd like me to write next!

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swaps55 · 3 months

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Dark Star

Ao3

Unlike most of the soirees Garrus has been to lately, the food is actually good. The Citadel’s superior supply lines aside, maybe it’s a good sign that all the times he’s stuffed himself into dress robes to put on a show for diplomats and, as Shepard likes to describe it, ‘bludgeon his way through bureaucracy,’ is actually accomplishing something.

Some days, putting a galaxy back together feels a lot harder than saving it in the first place.

Tonight’s party, thrown by the volus as a welcome mat for what is sure to be three days of grueling negotiations over how to prioritize who gets the new – and extremely limited – soil reclamation technology developed by the salarians, is actually more tolerable than most, if only for the company. The humans tapped Shepard to be the figurehead of their delegation. When Garrus asked him about humanity’s position on who deserved the higher share of devices fine-tuned to isolate and neutralize contaminants left behind by reaper corpses, he’d just laughed.

“Did you even know what this whole conference was about?” Garrus asks, handing him a fresh whiskey and Alenko a beer. The key to these events is to hit the bar hard and fast while the stocks hold out, and right now there is a lot of turian brandy. He’s not getting enough credit for juggling three drinks through a crowd without an incident.

“I think Ambassador Cartwright was trying to explain it to me, but I wasn’t paying attention,” Shepard replies, taking a sip of his drink. The band is loud – most everything at these receptions are a little over the top, as if they can force the galaxy back together if they’re cheerful enough – but the elcor singing backup vocals is surprisingly good.

Alenko snorts, but before he can elaborate on his disdain, another uniformed human puts a hand on Shepard’s arm and asks to speak with him about the keynote address he’s supposed to give in the morning and probably plans to make up as he goes.

Shepard gives Alenko a save me look before allowing himself to be towed to a quieter corner of the Silver Coast Casino, which doesn’t really exist.

“He wasn’t listening because he was thinking about all the ways he could incapacitate the guy,” Alenko says, never one to let a good dig go, even if the recipient is no longer within ear shot.

“Of course he was,” Garrus replies, tugging on his sleeve. He’s not sold the yellow stripes were a good choice, here. “That’s why I’ve learned not to stand near windows around him.”

A puzzled look passes briefly across Alenko’s face before he laughs it off. “Yeah. Exactly.”

Garrus flicks a mandible. Jack had brought up Shepard’s one-size-fits-all tactic of booting uncooperative mercs out skyscraper windows every chance she got on the Normandy. It hadn’t exactly been funny at the time, but then again, nothing was, and when there’s nothing good to laugh at you stretch the boundaries of what’s funny until something qualifies. Dark, maybe, but it had been a running joke for so long it had just become part of Shepard’s zeitgeist. Sure Alenko hadn’t been there, but it’s hard to believe that no one had told him that particular story. Especially Shepard. They talked about everything. As Shepard liked to confess, repeatedly and insistently, when he was drunk.

Hm.

Read the rest on Ao3

#mass effect #mshenko #kaidan alenko #garrus vakarian #this conversation hit me in the face while i was driving home from work #i blinked and suddenly there was a 2k story #¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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ursawastricked · 1 year

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Distracting: Part 5

The Sun Chaser: An annual, 24 hour work day in the lab, used to catch up on any missed work time from the past year..and this is your first year joining Viktor and Jayce for it..armed with an ungodly amount of caffeine, excitement for time with his lab partners, and a crippling sense of shame for his newly found intimate thoughts of you, Viktor will try and make it through an entire day without thinking of you in that way again..at least not with you realizing..

Wordcount: 3,366

WARNINGS: Alcohol, mention of sexual acts, but mostly fluff and light flirting so have fun! part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4

After another long shower, the third one that night, washing, rewashing, trying to scrub away any of shame that still coated the extent of his being. It had soaked far below his skin however, and had settled somewhere in his stomach, somewhere he couldn't run over with a loofa. But he would be damned if he didn't try. He stood in the kitchen, towel wrapped around his shoulders as he poked at some over cooked eggs on his plate, making every attempt to eat them as fast as possible after they had made a particularly squishy sound, and only further added to his shame. Oh that awful noise,

“Viktor, are you crying over your eggs?” Jayce asked, leaning on the counter edge, successfully getting Viktors attention as he had been hunched over, head in his hands for about five minutes at this point.

“What? No..just thinking” Viktor replied..in all fairness it was not a lie. He wished it was, because honestly not thinking right about now would probably save what was left of his sanity. He glanced at Jayce, taking what he realized was a coffee being offered to him, an offering he eagerly consumed, hoping it would jolt his brain into working order.

“Are you getting excited?” “For what?” “The Sun Chaser..” Jayce spoke the words like it was a legend, and in a way, it was.

The Sun Chaser, an annual tradition in The Hextech Lab. It was one, twenty-four hour work day, no sleep, non-stop make-up day, to push themselves ahead just a little bit and catch up on any work time lost over the last year. It was a night filled with workshopping, junk food, drinks..an ungodly and probably severely unhealthy amount of caffeine. But it was one of the pair's favorite nights of the year. The mixture of constant work, and sleep deprivation always made for a good time, lots of bonding, not to mention many many hours of laughing at jokes that probably aren't actually very funny.

“The Sun Chaser? Is that tonight?”

“Tomorrow, we have to prep Vik” Jayce chuckled, patting his shoulder and shaking Viktor a bit. “So you should get dressed, we need to go shopping. Here I made the list for this year,” Viktor glanced at Jayce, who held out a small folded paper, which he promptly plucked from his hand. He hummed to himself as he unfolded the paper, glancing over it for a little sneak peak into tomorrow's events. “Energy drinks, instant coffee, pastries, sweet milk,” he sighed constantly, already excited for that last item. “Booze, lemon juice..salt..what is all this extra stuff Jayce? Why would we need booze, a-and lemon juice?” “Oh,” Jayce blinked, uttering your name under his breath. “Yes..what abo-” Viktors sentence stopped in his throat..of course. You will be there tomorrow too. Of course you would, how on earth did he forget, “And..they asked for this? Why?” “Why said something about how booze would be fun as it got later, lemon for a chaser, and salt for before.” “They want to do shots?” “Sounds like it..oooo maybe they want to try body shots-” Viktor was quick to stop that idea, with a swift hard kick to Jayces leg. “OW!” Jayce howled out, quickly following it with a loud laugh as he saw that Viktor was now covering his head, shielding his entire upper body against the counter top.

“Oh this is going to be the best year yet!” Jayce cheered, shaking Viktor hard by the shoulders with a loud huff of excitement.

The clock rang twelve o'clock, and with it Jayce banged an obnoxious fake gong with a loud howl into the empty lab, you followed suit with your own, egging Viktor join in as well before you all took one long sip from individual mugs of coffee. The usual starting ritual for this thing, with one extra person this time around. “Hell yeah! Let's do this!” You call, quickly rushing to your notes and starting immediately, Viktor laughed, watching as you scattered away and quickly began his own work. A very pleasant beginning to the Sun Chaser.

Five hours in,

“Viktor! Viktor, can you come help me with something?” You asked, holding together two wires, observing how they resulted in a small spark. You heard the familiar click of Viktors cane against the floor before you felt the warm sensation of his body leaned over your shoulder looking down at your work. “What is it?” He asked, glancing down at your current project. You turn to meet his gaze, finding him much closer than you already had expected. He met your gaze, about half an inch between yourselves. Your cheeks grow warm, your mind stalling a little in its tracks as you watch his face stare back, maybe a little more surprised than you. He cleared his throat, catching your attention away from where it had settled on his lips. You flicker your gaze back to the device you have noticed was now smoking just a little from the unstable wires touching. “Oh shit..” You mutter, ceasing the connection. From next to your ear you hear the familiar sound of Viktors chuckle, right before he reaches over into the device.

“I see..You need me to hold these while you weld them together?” He assumed, but you again were not paying any attention, your mind a bit foggy from the smell of Viktors collogne wafting off of him. “Yes..” You whisper, finding yourself out of breath. You try again, inhaling and rephrasing the reply “Yes, you need to hold them for me okay? D-don't get burnt alright?” You remind him. And again you fight away a shiver when you can feel his chest rumble with laughter behind you.

Needless to say it took about ten minutes to finish the melding of the wire, all the while Jayce sat back in his chair, watching you with a familiar smirk. “Cute..” He muttered to himself, writing down a note in a little black notebook.

Nine hours in

You were eating your dinner quietly, a moment of shared silence while you took a much needed break. Viktor had taken liberties with the word “break”, hence why he was currently jotting down a theory he had in an almost full book of notes. But then the slightest movement caught his eye. He turned his head to look toward you, catching the tail end of your shiver.

He watched as you brought your hands up to your bare arms, rubbing them for some needed friction, the slightest bit of warmth. And before he could think too much about it he walks over, coat in hand before tapping your shoulder,

“Are you cold, děcko?” he asked, putting a hand on the back of your chair. You barely lift your head from your food to give him a little groan, rubbing your arms a little more furiously. “It's cold..” You reply quietly, resulting in a soft smile from Viktor. He nudged you with his coat, offering it to you,

“Here, until the heat comes on '' he said quietly, handing you the coat which to your credit, you stole away faster than he expected. In nearly half a minute you stood in front of him, hugging the coat around your form. It fit around you rather well in all honesty..but god this was a mistake.

Your body was perfectly tucked within something of his..he could feel his stomach tightening. And with the length of the fabric, it almost looked like you were not wearing anything under it- he needed to walk away. And so without a word, he walked away, very fast, to the bathroom, leaving you to settle back into your chair with a new found sense of warmth. Meanwhile, Viktor took the next fifteen minutes to try and cool down in the locked bathroom. Fifteen hours in

“Okay, okay, best shitty pick up line go!” You were all sitting around, about two shots in each. Jayce pointed to you first, “Go go go!” he chanted, watching as you chased your shot with an energy drink.You coughed a bit, tapping your chin as you tried to pick one, “OOOh I have it ok..” You turn to face Viktor, giving him a lightly goofy smirk, one you couldn't hold without giggling, “hey Vik..are you a triangle? Because, you would be acute one,”“What?” Viktor chuckled, watching as you nearly lost your mind giggling, leaning back against the floor as he began to mirror your giggles, “That..truly was terrible.” He sighed, sipping his drink and leaning back against his hands and watching as you began to wildly gesture to Jayce,“Ok now you! You go!” Jayce jumped at the idea, and quickly grabbed Viktor by the shoulder to get his attention, “Viktoooor..” Vik lazily turned his face toward his lab partner, raising an eyebrow inquisitively. “Do you have a bandage?” “No..why Jayce?” “Because I scraped my knee..falling for you~” Jayce cooed, leaning closer and swiftly giving Vik a kiss on the forehead before he pulled away, the three of you all bursting into tired laughter. Viktor took a brief moment, watching as you held your aching stomach, your hair splayed out on the ground around you like a halo..he couldn't begin to think about how pretty you were before Jayce caught his attention again. “Ok, Viktor..your turn. Best, shitty pick up line..go” Viktor blinked, trying to filter through any he had heard, at this point his memory was a little foggy, and now with booze in his body, he was having a harder time thinking of any he would consider particularly"shitty ".He grabbed hold of your forearm, with a little effort, hoisting you back up into a sitting position. You snickered lightly, leaning closer as he kept a firm hold on your arm, gazing into your eyes with a passion that had your belly fluttering. “You look familiar..did we have class together?” He asked, his accent thick and breath smelling of the rum you had been sharing. You give one soft chuckle, tilting your head in prep for the rest of this surely crappy punny joke, “Because I swear..” He leaned a little closer, your nose scrunched..but you didn't pull away, “we had chemistry.” He hummed, drawing out the end of the word a little and leaning close enough that your noses brushed briefly, right before he pulled back. You felt your cheeks burn, and you stared forward at him as he took a leisure sip of his mostly empty drink. His gaze flickered off you, toward Jayce who groaned loudly, “BOOOOOOOO!” “What?” “BOO that was gold, I said shitty!” Jayce protested, sending you to his side of the argument, “Yeah that was so good! BOO!” Viktor laughed, putting his hands up to defend when you tossed an empty can toward him, weak enough that it just bounced off him. Jayce watched as you both continued your little scuffle, a few kitten bats here and there as you debated what exactly made a pick up line, a good one. He quietly jotted down another little note, smiling softly to himself when he caught You and Viktor leaned over, laughing toward each other, your hand using his shoulder to support yourself.

Twenty hours in

Viktor was so exhausted at this point. His mind was barely functioning at this point, so he was working on auto-pilot, which meant only his hands and eyes worked in full. That's probably why when you asked him if he had an extra screw, he didn't respond in english..not fully. It was a mix of his mother tongue and a few english words half slurred in there. “What?” you giggle, leaning closer. He lazily leaned sideways to hear you better, “Hm? jenom chvilku..I will..” He sputtered off after that. You chuckle slightly, stealing some of his empty cans of soda away so you could sit closer on the desk. “Jenom..” You try to repeat. Viktors brain gets the little spark it needs, one that brings a little more consciousness to him and he turns to look at you, still tucked in his sweater and leaning a few inches away from touching him. “What was that?” He asked, putting a hand on your head to keep it from laying on his shoulder..at this rate he knew it would completely turn his brain off if he could smell your hair. “I'm trying to speak your language. You sometimes mutter under your breath while you're working, and it always sounds really pretty.” “Well, your accent is atrocious..” He chuckles, resting his cheek against his hand as he watches you mirror his posture again..it was becoming one of his favorite of your habits. “You need to stop enunciating so harshly..Jenom. Chvilku” He purred, saying the words slowly for you to repeat. “Jenom chvilku,” you chuckle, trying to mimic his accent. “What does that mean? Does it mean something pretty?” Viktor shakes his head slowly, his smile plastered on his face as he watches you exhausted form slump over the desk, “It means ‘just a moment’,” he replied, “something pretty would be ‘něco hezkého’, if you meant that literally” “I didn’t, but that still sounded nice” you mutter, smiling toward him. At this point the sun had risen again, but Viktor in his ever nocturnal nature had drawn the curtains, allowing for the softest golden glow to invade the lab. The gold color played well of Viktors features, his chiseled cheekbones glowing lighty, and his eyes almost the color of the lighting..it was warm and soft, sending a buzzing feeling into your chest. One you were only partly aware of how mutual the feeling was. “Do you want me to keep talking?” He asked, bringing his hands back to his work. His gaze flicked between yours and and his project,“Yes please,,” You mutter, resting your head on your folded arms, watching as he fiddles with the machine, letting his voice filter through your brain and numbing it beautifully.

Twenty-four hours in

You were out. Your head was heavy against the desk, your chest rising and falling in a calming rhythm, one that Viktor had been observing for the past hour. A full day of working had passed, just about, and he had finished all he needed too, even fixing one or two of your projects up for you after you had fallen asleep. Jayce was sprawled out on the couch, watching the clock and trying to finish his calculations. Though he had made sure to keep check on you and vik as he worked. Viktor was slumped over the desk, watching you sleep lazily, a dumb smile on his face as he fiddled quietly with your relaxed hand still laid out on the desk. He was gentle..simply fluttering your fingertips under his, experimentally brushing them against your palm from time to time. Your skin was soft, and while your cheek was flushed with exhaustion, all he could do was focus on how lovely you looked. The sun had snuck its way into the lab, and dotted along the desk, warming your skin and highlighting the shine in your hair. It was bliss, the kind that had him humming a little song from his home, imagining that he was singing to keep you asleep. It was a brief moment, a perfect ending to the long day in his humble, love sick, opinion.“Watches her sleep..” Jayce muttered, scratching down the note in his book. Viktor raised his head, swiveling it toward his lab partner to see him jotting down something again.“What? What are you doing?” “Adding to my list,” Jayce replied simply, giving Viktor an innocent look..one Vik was able to see past instantly. “What list..” He muttered, standing and taking a firm hold on his cane as he limped closer. Jayce chuckled, hiding away the contents of the notebook like a teen girl hid her diary, “It's private! Kinda, if you still wanna play the clueless act” He laughed, leaning away as Viktor went in to snatch it from him eagerly. The boys played this game for a few minutes, one minute Jayce offering the book, before pulling it away again and adding to an ever more impatient Viktor, who was now too curious to let something like this go. “You have been writing in this thing for the whole day-” “I've been writing in it way longer than that,” “How long?” “I don't know, a few months?” Jayce shrugged, trying to do the math with what little was left in his tired brain, that is when Viktor was able to steal away the notes, snatching them and leaning away from a weak attempt to get them back. He flicked open the small book, reading the first few lines, “What could you possibly be taking note of? ‘Pointed out a bruise on their thigh’, ‘fixed his hair’, Jayce what is thi-” Viktor lost his words half way through, his tongue feeling heavy as his overworked head began to place memories together..notes..he was nothing interacts between you two? Why? How many things have been written down? His eyes widened, ‘spent the entire party staring at them, and then stole a champagne glass they used’. His cheeks flushed, a mix of rage and embarrassment filling his exhausted body almost enough to spill over and lash out if his weak body would allow it. “Y..you have been taking notes? Why?”

“Research..thought you would wanna keep track of each little detail for later” “Jayce this is improper! Taking notes on my interactions?” “Theirs too,” Jayce corrected, watching as Viktor gave him a confused look, he pointed to the index on the first page, “Red is interactions you initiated, blue is when they initiated”

Vik looked at the pages, flicking through them quickly and indeed..seeing a mix of red and blue scrawled across the pages expances.He took a brief moment to read over some, ‘Stared at Viktor while he tested the Hexclaw’, ‘Asked if Viktor liked milk in his tea’ His cheeks flushed lightly, flicking through a few more pages before the pair heard you stirring at the desk.

Your head felt heavy, like it was full of rocks. Not only that, but your ears rung, as your eyes watered in protest of your current consciousness. It was not a good idea to be awake right now, however you had found that a desk was not a comfortable place to rest, despite how cozy Viktor seemed to make it look.

“Guys..? Is it over? Did we do it?” you ask, turning your head to look at your lab partners. You for a brief moment can't make out what is happening, seeing only a blur as Jayce struggles to his feet, and Viktor hurries to put his hand in his pocket. When your vision clears, you see them looking at you, a little too surprised for your liking. “What..?”

“Uh..nothing! Nothing! Just..packing up” Viktor barks out, rushing to grab the things still left on his desk. Jayce follows suit, packing his bag at a speed that leaves you trying to catch up,

“OH!” Jayce suddenly pipes up, interrupting as you try to wrestle your notebook into your bag, “You're still sleeping over at our place today right?” He asked. Viktor froze..his hands stalling over the zipper on his satchel as his mind tried to double check what he was hearing. ‘Sleeping over…at our place’..

Fuck.

You were.

Two days ago, while planning for The Sun Chaser with you, Jayce had offered for you to crash at their shared apartment the day after, seeing that your apartment was much further from the lab, it would be best to sleep in their apartment and not risk passing out on the way home.

“Yeah! I got my pajamas packed and ready in my bag!” You reply, smiling as you start to make your way to the door, following close behind an exhausted Jayce, and behind you..a much more awake Viktor.

A very awake, and very screwed Viktor.

TEEHEE HEE thank you for reading part 5 HEHEHEHEHEHEHHE, oooo shits going down next time gang, bro cant find his shit anymore @zaunitearchives @astralkiss @mackbethart @theseuscloud @g4l4xy-qu33n @ears-queers-gears-n-fears @thymesoup @cheeriecherrymain @saumspam

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forgodsgoddamnsake · 2 months

Text

Belly Dancer - 6

Warning: angst, smut oral f\receiving, domestic violence, drinking, language.

If you are triggered you can skip the last part, please, your mental health is important.

You were getting ready to get out of the club as you finished your performances. Taking off your makeup was something you hated so much, so you decided to leave your makeup on till you get home. You changed into knee-level shorts and a pump black jacket when you heard a knock on the door.

Angela answered the door, the same figure that stood there a month back. You both were busy; you had a lot of performances to keep up with while Harry was trying to convince Ray to give him the deal or at least find a plan B. So, you hadn’t seen each other since the day he was at your apartment, only called and texted to check on each other, that made you uncomfortable a little. You thought he didn’t like you anymore or he just was not interested so you kept to yourself until he appeared again in his full glory at your door.

“Look, Angela, the prodigal son has returned!” You commented as he stepped in rising his middle finger and Angela giggled at the both of you.

“I’m not here for you, love.” He wiggled his eyebrows and you raised yours. “I’m here for Angela.” He looked at Angela and you followed his eyes.

Angela looked taken aback and muttered, “M-me? Why?”

He held the door knob and opened the door completely, “Outside the club you’ll see a black Rolls Royce, get in and the driver will take you home.”

She looked at you and you nodded, “Go, Angela, if he kidnaps you, I’ll bite his dick off.”

“Fair enough.” She giggled and got out of the room and Harry happily closed it behind her.

“You do not treat little Harry very nicely, love.” He smirked walking towards you and pulling you into him.

“Oh my god, you call your dick little Harry? No wonder you were single.” You chuckled and kissed him.

“Mhm, I was saving myself for you.” He commented and kissed you again and deepened the kiss, but you had to stop him, pulling away.

“Why did you make her leave? Are you taking me out?”

“Yes, I’m taking you to this bar that has Karaoke. Figured you may want to sing a little.” He smirked and gave you a little spank which you returned sticking out your tongue at him.

“Fine, but we need to grab a bite first, I’m starving.” You said, grabbing your purse.

“Whatever you ask for, princess.” He said as he walked you out the room.

The nicknames he gave you were not the same all the time. He thought that they all fit you, so why wouldn’t he call you every nickname he knew?

You passed him your car keys and slid into the passenger seat; you were not in the mood for driving. He drove you to a fast-food restaurant and you ordered by the drive-thru. He pulled over somewhere quiet so you could eat. You connected your phone with the car to turn on some music.

“Can’t we eat peacefully?” He whined, taking out your burger to hand it to you.

‘Me Enamore’ by Shakira blasted and you started singing along swaying your belly, taking the burger from him.

“No, we can’t. Now shut up!”

“You don’t even speak Spanish, y/n!” He chuckled sipping cola from his cup.

“It sounds so much like Italian- Me enamore!” You sang loudly with the sandwich in your hand untouched.

“Fuck, you’re so sexy when you speak languages I don’t understand.” He chuckled again, vibing with you to the song he didn’t understand.

“I can do it all the time, baby, I speak two other languages.” You said, biting your burger.

“Say something in Italian then.” He dared, biting his sandwich.

“Amore mio, sei un fastidioso.” You said, looking at him as if you said I love you.

“Oh god, that’s sexy.” He smirked. “What does that mean?”

“My love, you’re annoying.” You translated, laughing as he gave you an angry look. “You should see your face!”

“Okay then, say something nice in Arabic.”

You said something in Arabic, made eye contact. He did not understand a word you had said, but he felt like you actually said something nice that time. To him, it felt like you were telling him that he was the only person on earth.

“Wow, I’ll fall in love now. Translate, go on.” He smiled, leaning his head back on his seat.

“Many people must have told you that you have beautiful eyes, but I look at them and lose all words though I speak 3 languages.” You smiled softly.

“God,” His smile widened. He leaned forward to peck on your lips. “That is the nicest thing someone ever said to me.”

“I’m good with words, you know.” You chuckled.

“Oh, you’re good in a lot of things, princess.”

“Really, what else am I good at?” You asked covering your full mouth with your hand.

“You’re good at dancing, reading, writing, languages, um, and you gave me a good head.”

“Shut up, I overstimulated you with that tip thing!” You giggled.

“It’s fine, it’s your first time so that’s okay.”

“Who said it was my first time?”

“What? Who?”

“You don’t want me to talk about my sex experience, H.”

“I know it’s none of my business-“

“No, it’s just weird, Harry. Generally, I did not have full sex, but just little foreplay and it sucked.”

“Why’s that?” He actually enjoyed the idea of him being the best for you but he wouldn’t admit it even to himself.

“I don’t know, ugh, maybe they sucked, maybe I was just uncomfortable. I never came not even for once” You explained and his smirk widened. “What, smirky?”

“I made you cum twice.”

“Because you’re such a good boy.” You winked and he bit his lip.

“And you’re such a bad, bad girl.” He whispered, leaning in to kiss you deeply.

He nibbed on your bottom lip, and you slipped your tongue into his mouth. The kiss was deep like a deep hole you both did not want to get out of.

“Backseat.” He ordered and you obliged.

You rested on your back in the backseat and he came onto you, kissing you again. You grabbed him deeper onto you by the neck. He unzipped your jacket to see you in a black lace bra, one nipple almost skipped.

“Such a naughty nipple.” He smirked and kissed you again, squeezing your breasts from under the bra without taking it off. He twisted your nipples slightly and got a loud moan out of you.

“Shh, got to keep quiet, princess.” He mumbled on your lips, sliding another hand under your shorts, feeling your wetness through the fabric of your panties.

“Oh, looks like someone’s wet.” He teased you, rubbing two fingers on your clit.

“Yes, please, Harry.” You moaned as quietly as you could.

“Please what, princess?” He whispered as he began kissing your earlobe.

“Please, touch me.” He smirked on your skin and took off your shorts and panties half-way.

He raised your closed legs up so he could lick you in such a small space. And he did not waist a second of it, as one of his hands were holding your legs up, the other one was opening you up a little so his tongue could reach all the right places.

He drew circles on your clit with his tongue, giving you a few full licks, nibbing at your pussy lips. And with all that happening, you could not stop your loud moans.

“Fuck, Harry!” You moaned.

“Quiet, princess, I don’t have a third arm to shut you up with.” He said before continuing his job.

He sucked onto your little clit between his lips and with that you were shaking under him as you put your hands on your mouth to muffle your moans. Your back arched all the way and your eyes were closed shut as you came. Harry gave you a few little licks and you flinched as you were too sensitive.

He adjusted your shorts and panties again and leaned to kiss you deeply, and you could taste yourself on his lips.

The bar was cool, not too many lights that could blind a blind man. Music was nice, and there were people that were doing karaoke while being drunk. You both sat on one table and asked for your drinks, you got yourself tequila and he ordered martini.

“Wuss.” You glanced at him as you poured down your tequila.

“Martini makes me wuss?”

“Yes, vanilla.” You smirked and wiggled your eyebrows.

“You keep teasing me with this vanilla shit just because I’m being nice with you only because you’re a virgin.”

“What if I weren’t?”

“I’d fuck you till you couldn’t walk for weeks.” He whispered in your ear and you felt yourself getting wet again.

“Hmm, I’ll think about it.” You put a strand of hair behind your ear and he brushed his fingers on your hair.

“You smell like musk and roses.” He smiled, looking into your eyes. You blushed a little.

“Tell me about yourself, H.”

“What do you want to know?”

“Whatever you want.”

“Well,” He took a sip from his drink, “I’m from the UK, obviously.”

“That’s too obvious, Harry. Sometimes I have trouble understanding you, speak English, dude.”

“You’re mean, you have an accent, too!”

“Because my first language isn’t English. What’s your excuse, smirky?” You chuckled resting your head on his shoulder for a second.

“It’s not that bad.” He smiled.

“It’s nott thattt bad.” You imitated and he burst into laughing and you followed. “How can I keep up with such accent!” You laughed as he kissed your temple.

“Okay, okay, you’re right.” He chuckled. “My mother and sister are in England. My mother’s name is Anne, sister’s Gemma. I visit from time to time.”

“Is she younger or older?”

“She’s older. I shouldn’t be talking about my work here, but we can catch that some other time. I, ugh, I loved colorful clothes, I loved painting, but all of that was gone when I got into what I do now.”

“I have an idea; we can take some time off. You paint and I draw. Artistic buddies, eh?”

“I don’t know if I’ll have the time.” He shook his head, a little sad.

“You have time to see me, we can merge both.” You tried convincing him with your wide puppy eyes. He smiled at you, kissed your temple.

“Whatever you want, baby.”

You had more drinks and you started losing it, not even realizing it. He didn’t talk much about himself at that time and you didn’t insist, instead you kept teasing each other and laughing about it.

Until you decided it was your time to sing, you stood up and tried to walk straight to choose a song. Once you did, you sang as he sat on the table, arms crossed, watching you as you were singing. Loving every moment of it, he chuckled as you used your long hair to dance, you kept shaking your head or holding it all in one hand to sway it in the air. He cupped his face and kept watching you like he could see something nobody else was seeing. He was happy.

Io sono lunatico e pratico dove cazzo mi pare

Io non sono nero Io non sono bianco Io non sono attivo Io non sono stanco Io non provengo da nazione alcuna Ma io, sì, ti porto sulla luna

Io vengo dalla luna.

You were having fun, but Harry had to stop you as you were trying to unzip your jacket which provided you with chanting from the audience. You. Were. Wasted. He grabbed you by the arm and zipped your jacket all the way back up.

“You’re no fun, H!” You smacked his arm as he was practically dragging you out.

“You were undressing, y/n. Let’s get you home.” He opened the door of the passenger seat for you but you refused to go in and started kissing his jawline.

“Darling, let’s get you home, you’re not okay now.” He said softly which you nodded to. He tried getting you again in your seat as he protected your head with his hand as you went in so you wouldn’t smack your head. He buckled your car seat and gave you a kiss on the cheek.

He got into his seat and started the engine, but you wouldn’t stop singing the whole ride.

“MA IO, SI, TI PORTO SULLA! IO VENGO DALLA LUNA!” You sang, dancing in your place.

“Io veno dala luna.” He chuckled as he tried singing along.

“Oh, amore mio, it’s ‘Vengo dalla luna’. I come from the moon.” You said loudly, almost like you didn’t hear yourself.

“Io vengo dalla luna.” He sang again.

“Amore mio, your voice is soft as a cloud.” You said reaching over to kiss his face as he was driving.

“Y/N, we’re going to have an accident, we’re almost there, baby. Stop.” He tried stopping you gently.

“No, I just wanna eat you but I need to sleep first.” You almost whispered, and fell asleep on him all of a sudden. He chuckled to himself kissing your temple.

He adjusted you so your head would rest on his shoulder, gave a call to Jack to open the front door. He drove safely and pulled over at his mansion. After opening the door of the passenger seat, he unbuckled your seat belt and called for you but you were dreaming by then.

He reached over to get your purse and put it on your lap before carrying you bridal style. He walked inside as Jack was keeping the door open for you both. Once he reached his floor he got you on the bed gently, brushed your hair off of your face and smiled to himself, then took off your shoes. And when he was trying to get out of the room to get you a glass of water he felt a phone vibrate. He grabbed his phone and there was nothing. He reached for your purse and opened it to find your phone vibrating with the name of ‘Jess the bitch’ on the screen.

“Hello.” He answered.

“Who’s this? Where’s y/n?” She asked hysterically.

“Calm down, it’s Harry. We went out and she had too much to drink, had to get her back at my place. She’s sleeping now, don’t worry.”

“Okay, tell her to call me that little bitch.”

“Okay, will do.”

“If you hurt her, I swear to fu-“

“She’s fine, I swear! She’ll call you tomorrow and tell you that I’m a good boy.”

“Good my ass! Bye.”

“Bye.”

He went to bring you a glass of water and went into the room to find you speaking in your sleep. He furrowed his eyes as he placed the glass on the nightstand, he sat on the edge of the bed next to your sleeping body which was clearly fighting something that wasn’t seen.

You were speaking in a foreign language, he tried calling for you, rubbing your back gently.

“Stop! Stop hitting her! I did nothing wrong, Papa.” You sleep-talked.

“Baby, y/n, wake up, it’s just a dream.” He said, clearly worried.

Your voice became louder more like yelling, you were speaking in more than one language but he only caught the English part.

“Mama, I don’t wanna go back.” you said before muttering something in Italian. “I’m gonna fucking kill you, I’m gonna kill you, I’m gonna kill you!” You repeated, fighting the air.

“Y/N, it’s just a nightmare, baby wake up, please! Please, baby, wake up for me!” He started shaking you to wake you up.

You never stopped repeating ‘I’m gonna kill you’ and Harry was trying to grab your hands that were fighting.

“It’s gonna be okay, y/n! It’s just a nightmare, baby. Baby, wake up for god’s sake, please.” He was trying to shake you more to wake you up and with that your eyes snapped open only for him to see pure fear. Harry pulled you into his arms as you were muttering, “He’s here, Harry, he’s here. He’ll kill me, I have to kill him. I have to kill him, Harry.”

“Shh, baby, nobody’s trying to hurt you. I’m with you, it was just a nightmare, y/n. You’re safe.” He assured as he kept rubbing your back gently till you calmed down. “Come on, drink some water.” He said and took the glass to help you drink.

You drank the whole glass and closed your eyes again to sleep. He placed you again on the bed gently and brushed a strand of hair out of your sweaty face. With the glass in his hand, Harry looked through the window in front of him and sighed.

He did not know what was going on, but he felt responsible to keep you safe. How could he protect you from nightmares of things he didn’t know? At that time, everything to him was grey. He was attracted to you, liked you, but protecting you from things like that, it was another story. He needed to know the story behind the girl sleeping on his bed.

To him, as much as you were an open book, there were a lot of mysteries.

A sun ray slipped through the window and onto your face only to wake you up. Headache was killing you, the major pain made you close your eyes to the light. You looked around and you were alone on the bed, and you were wearing your underwear and bra underneath a big white shirt. Pictures of the night before were popping in your head, you smiled to them till your smile was wiped off by the memory you had of your sleep. It happened again; your worst fears only became true when you’d go to sleep just to freak you out. It had been years and nothing seemed better.

You sat on the bed, looking through the window you didn’t know Harry was looking through the night before. Flashbacks of your old life were streaming in your head and nothing could stop them. Your tears were about to drop down when Harry opened the door of the room, but you didn’t look in his way.

Yet, he looked at you with the tray that contained food and a glass of juice in his hands. He sighed and gave a smile, “Good morning, sleeping beauty.”

“What did I say yesterday, Harry?” You asked with no expression, not taking your eyes off the sun ray.

He walked to the bed and placed the tray on a nightstand, took a seat next to you.

“You remember?” He asked gently.

“No, I just remember the nightmare I had.”

“Did it happen before?”

“Yes. Every couple of days I get a nightmare and wake up to Jessica trying to calm me down.” Your voice was low, raspy, and sad.

“If you don’t want to tell, that’s fine, but I’m really worried about you.”

You sighed; headache was only getting worse.

“When I was seven, I watched my father slap my mom because she disagreed on something. When I got older, the violence only got worse. I was hit many times, saw my mom get hit, watched my father strip my brother to his boxers and tie him down as he hit him. Oh my god, I can’t no more, I can’t.” You sobbed and Harry only brought you into him, brushing your hair and rubbing your back.

Your cries only got louder as all the memories hit you all at once. You pulled away from Harry, your hands in his, “He-He slapped me and I didn’t do anything to deserve it, Harry. I didn’t deserve to be hit! H-he’d throw stuff at me and call me a nothing, that a pair of flip-flops were better than I was.” You sniffed and closed your eyes.

“He’s not here, baby, he’s not anymore.” He cupped your cheeks to make you look at him. “Look at me, y/n, open your eyes and look at me.” You opened your eyes at his words and he continued, “No one’s going to hurt you anymore, baby. I’ll kill anyone that comes near you, darling. You’re a big girl now, you’re independent, beautiful, successful, and you are better than everybody. Don’t cry, baby, I’m here. I swear nobody’s going to lay a finger on you.”

He held you closer and brought your head on his chest, kissed your temple.

Harry had decided, that protecting you was his responsibility from anyone, anything.

So, what do you think should happen next?

#harry styles #harry styles smut #harry #harry x reader #smut #love #harry styles smuts #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry edward styles #smuts

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anklesoraus · 6 months

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Hello, hope you are having a good day/night

I was wondering if I could request a BAU Team x Male reader

Where they get a strange case involving around an abandoned asylum as is someone is experimenting on the victims that have shown up dead.

What if unsub captures reader and does similar experiments on him only this time the unsub is taunting the BAU with fact he has one of the team by sending pic/videos of what he's doing.

(I was kinda thinking the Unsub is experimenting with old school psychiatric methods?)

The missing agent

A/n: Mmm my first request well actually second but the first one went poof and I hope this is to your liking at least? Sorry it took so long for me to reply to this, I’ve been busy getting ready for an upcoming exam and college has been punching me in the gut. Also I’m trying out new things with tumblr so my layouts will change a lot to see which I would like but besides that I hope you like this half assed story I wrote with little sleep and like 3 monsters, love ya and happy early thanksgiving <3

Warnings: BAU x male reader, mentions of kidnapping, not proofread, half assed

The Behavioral Analysis Unit (BAU) of the FBI was called to investigate a series of murders that had taken place in an abandoned asylum. The victims had shown up dead, and the killer had left no clues behind. The BAU was stumped, and they couldn't figure out who the killer was or what his motive was.

“Why did they give us this sicko to find” Penelope mumbled under her breath while trying to do some research.

As they were investigating the case, one of their own, Y/n, was kidnapped by the unsub. The unsub then was going to do similar experiments on Y/n as he had done on his previous victims.

“Let me go you sick bastard!” Y/n yelled, moving around as he was tied up to the bed and his eyes covered with a blindfold.

In the distance he heard a laugh. A sinister laugh it was low and grogy but it sounded so loud like he was everywhere, in every corner.

Y/n didn’t want to show weakness, no he’s too old for that. But for the first time in years he is feeling fear. He’s been in the BAU for around 6 years, all the ups and downs yet he’s never felt fear until now, when it’s him as the victim.

“What do you want from me?!” He shouted, with all the fear trying not to show.

The unsub could only laugh more, “you’re scared..I like that.” He had said in his groggy voice.

Y/n grimaced in disgust from the comment, so this man is a sadist he thought to himself. Clearly it makes since with all the crimes he’s done that’s involved causing people pain. All Y/n could do was lay there, thinking if his team will be able to save him.

Four weeks. Y/n has been gone for four weeks. The BAU is scared for him and hopes he’s fine. The once joy and laughter that filled the office from Y/n’s jokes is now gone. All that is there is a gloomy and sad aura in the air. They wont give up, Y/n is family he will be saved and they wont give up.

The unsub liked to experiment with old school psychiatric methods, and he was using them on Y/n. The BAU was horrified when they received pictures and videos of the things that the unsub was doing to Y/n.

“He’s sick!” Yelled out Spencer. The BAU was angry at the unsub but glad to know Y/n is still alive.

The BAU knew that they had to act fast if they wanted to save Y/n’s life. They worked tirelessly to track down the unsub and rescue Y/n. They wouldn’t rest until they saved their friend, their member, their family.

Y/n is still tied on that god awful bed. He lost count of the experiments but he hated them. He didn’t know what was put in him or what it would do but he is scared. Today was the day he lost it.

“Hello Darling, I have something new for you and all you have to do is drink it.” The unsub said, walking towards Y/n as he heard the footsteps coming closer.

“No..please stop this.” Y/n said in a weak voice, it was almost like he was someone else. His color now all pale, his lips dry, and his body aching to where he wish he was shot instead.

The unsub can only laugh as he grabbed a hold of Y/n to force his mouth opened as he poured in the orange green liquid. Y/n squirmed as tears finally fell from his eyes behind the blindfold.

Burning. The liquid felt like it was burning his insides and like his head was close to exploding. Once all the liquid was finally gone the unsub released Y/n from his grasp and stepped back a bit to see the results.

The feeling made Y/n scream so loud and cry so hard that he just wanted to end it. All this pain he feels is on a whole different level and he hates it. He hates the feeling of being a lab rat, knowing he could die anytime now.

After a long and grueling investigation, the BAU finally caught the unsub. Y/n heard gunshots as he jolts from a sleep he fell into. He wanted to speak or scream for help but his body was too weak for him to do anything. He just sat there feeling weak and useless for once in his life.

He hears the door being kicked opened and heard a voice that he can’t believe he would say he missed but he did.

“I found him agent Reid” he heard Derek say as the footsteps got closer. Y/n doesn’t know why but he tried to break out, scared that they would hurt him.

“He really fucked him up..” Derek muttered under his breath as he went to take off the blindfold and the rope that was holding Y/n.

Y/n kept his eyes closed scared, he was shaking trying to process everything. Y/n the once fearless and brave agent is scared and has fear bottled up. He couldn’t do nothing but tightly grab onto Derek and cry. He cried and cried with the strength he had left until he felt his eyes grow heavy.

The case was one of the most challenging that the BAU had ever faced, but they were able to overcome it with their expertise and determination. They were glad to finally have Y/n back but they hope he can go back to being his happy and funny self. One can only hope.

#criminal minds #x male reader #experiments #anklesoraus #idk how tags work #tags are hard

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miss0atae · 3 months

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It's my random thoughts about Pit Babe the series ep 12:

What can I say? I still have so much fun watching this series. I know there are some loose ends and plot holes, but frankly I don't really care.

▪️ Way saved Pete from Kenta who fled the scene as soon as possible. It was really the episode where Way finally stopped spending all his time drinking and drowning his sorrow. He finally decided to properly apologize to Babe (even if he knew he would not be forgiven) and help everyone take Tony down. He used his power to help get some documents and tried his best to show remorse. I'm still not his best fan but it was a nice change from previous episodes where he was just crying and feeling hopeless. We can thank Pete who helped him a lot.

▪️ Speaking about Pete, this guy really see everyone good side even if they don't show it. He believes Way, still think that Kenta is a good person deep down (which I agree) and do his best to save all children taken by Tony. I still think their plan to do it isn't exactly the best but it works for the series so what should I say?

▪️ Babe really wants to put an end to Tony's actions and he does everything to get it. He didn't want to forgive Way, but to have his end goal happen, he accepted him in the team. When Way asked him if one day they could go back to how their relationship was, he wasn't entirely against it. He simply told him, it wouldn't happen soon but they might get there. Even if he is still really sad over Charlie supposed-death, he is poised and ready to fight no matter what. Babe is impressive.

▪️ Jeff was captured by Kenta to be sold to the new auction, since every special child Tony had, disappeared or is fighting against him. What is the point of seeing the future, if you can't save yourself from being kidnapped?! I know they told us, he can't really control his power but it's very unfortunate he couldn't this time. I was impressed about how calm he was.

▪️ Alan was trying is best to find him and was helped by his "family" (Can we say that Pit Babe is a BL type version of Fast & Furious ?). North and Sonic have always been helping him but I'm glad we saw Kim. Even if I get two minutes of him, I'm happy. I'm attached to this character. By the end of the episode, Alan saved Jeff. The power of love... always here when you need it. I only have one question: Why did they leave the children behind? Is there a good reason?

▪️ Finally, I'll talk about Kenta... It's been several episode where Kenta was abused by Tony and this one was no exception. I feel so sad for this man. He truly believed Tony was his father but unfortunately Tony never saw him as his child because he is not "special". It broke my heart to see Kenta kneeling and begging Tony. I wish he would understand how he could be loved and treated well if he just stopped helping him and leave! I hope in the next episode he will be free from Tony. He must be saved like the other children taken by Tony.

▪️ Oh and of course, we all knew the man who helped Charlie and Jeff is Babe's father. Anyone was surprised?!

▪️ Charlie also saved Babe in the last two minutes of this episode. and we'll get the reunion we were hoping between them, in the next one. It's a happy ending guaranteed. I just feel like 13 episodes is too light to tight up everything. Why didn't they make 14? Is there a good reason for this choice?

Anyway, Friday will feel empty when this series will end.

#my thoughts #thai series #thai bl #bl drama #bl series #random thoughts #pit babe the series #pit babe #Kim it's always nice to see you!#They need to save Kenta #It's unbearable to see him always being mistreated by Tony #I didn't talk about Winner but he is so annoying #Can't wait to see Babe's reaction about Charlie's resurrection and when he will see his father again #spoilers #episode 12 #the power of love

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tomystars · 9 months

Text

raysand/sandray theories + analysis

(because im insane)

This is a little post where I'll be focusing on what's to come for raysand mostly based on the trailer (original trailer too) and what we already know from the episodes that have aired already. I'll be using pictures so the text doesn't feel too eavy.

Also want to mention I didn't think about all of this myself, it's mostly a compilation of me and my friend throwing ideas and thoughts at one another and I decided to make a post on this now because me and her predicted something that happened on yesterdays episode...

Before I begin, considering it's based on our thoughts, ideas and what we know of the trailer (which is often edited in a way where sometimes certain dialogue doesn't end up being the same one we see on the episodes) please take everything with a grain of salt. If you want to share your opinions, feel free to do so my inbox is open!

Let's begin!

Although this is mostly a theories focused posted, I do want to first talk a little bit about how Ray & Sand's relationship is at the moment.

We all know things are going to escalate more but for now both Ray and Sand consider each other as friends. I've mentioned this in another post before (that has recently been deleted because it wasn't very well written) but one of Sand's best qualities and what makes him, in my eyes, the best character in this series, is that out of everyone else he's KIND.

First episode we have him meeting Ray for the first time and the only reason he got mean was because Ray was being an asshole first. Yet, after all of that, he still understood Ray was drunk and he gave him a ride to his own home, let him puke on his toilet, gave him a place to sleep on... All of this to a complete stranger by the way! You can't with certainty tell me everyone would do something like this. In return, Ray acted like an asshole once again which lead him to being kicked out of Sand's place (later on I'll talk about why I think Ray reacted that way), and eventually Ray did end up apologising which I think was something Sand didn't expect.

Another thing that made it more easy for Sand to forgive Ray was when Ray said "Thanks for saving my life." which was a very honest thing to say and Sand realised that, he kind of got a little bit of an insight of what Ray truly is like. I often see people commenting about Ray being dramatic by saying that when he was not. He meant what he said and frankly Sand DID save his life. Had Sand left him alone, Ray would've driven while drunk which could've very well ended in an accident.

Fast forward, Ray keeps seeking him out (another thing that will come into play later on), hires him to be his drinking buddy, convinces him to leave a girl Sand was trying to take home to drive to drive him instead, they have a talk, seem to be on the same page, hook up and everything is fine. For now.

This is the first fight they have in the trailer. I think, at this point, they have already started to hang out more and being more close together, so Sand is starting to expect more from Ray, specially the way Ray acts around him, always being flirty, always saying certain things ("I care about your feelings. That's why I'm here." previews are always a bit deceitful so maybe Ray isn't even saying this to him but we move), always going after him, always wanting Sand to spend time with him, but at the same time saying they can never be more than what they already are, which will most likely give Sand a lot of mixed feelings.

Just like we saw on yesterday's episode, Ray will most likely keep leaving Sand for Mew, which I don't really mind considering that Ray is a girls girl and he will always put his friends above himself, but at a certain point I get why Sand would get upset considering they are friends too and it's just very horrible being the one left behind specially when you keep get mixed messages from this guy you're starting to like. He'll probably realise there's something between Mew and Ray too.

In this fight scene, Ray is probably once again leaving Sand for Mew which is why Sand says "Focus on me for once will you?". In return Ray says this:

"What are we to each other?" is a very key sentence in their relationship. The way I see it Ray will too start questioning their relationship, thinking "What are we?" because they'll both be floating around each other but no one will ever say anything. I'll get a little bit more into Ray's personality later on but Ray might be just as confused as Sand, he probably never had a relationship quite like what they both have and it's scary. At the same time, he could also just be saying that to be mean (I'm not trying to paint him as a villain, I love him and this all ties in with what I'll be saying later about his personality."

The second fight scene we see in the trailer. I don't know if any of you remember but in the original trailer there's a scene where they're both in the car and Sand says "I don't want to be in anyone's choices." (there's also a scene where Ray gets arrested but we won't talk about that), which could mean Sand doesn't want to be a choice, someone in a "competition" with someone else, but the one Ray would want to be with no matter what.

This scene we're seeing is most likely the equivalent of that scene in the old trailer. I think at this time in their relationship Sand has already confessed that he wants more from Ray, that he doesn't want to keep being a "choice" and that he wants them to be in a relationship which leads to them having a fight, and eventually to Ray saying this.

Now, I can finally get into Ray's personality and the reason why he acts defensively in both of these scenes with Sand. Ray is scared. I do think Ray has a crush in Mew but I don't think it has ever been more than a crush, Ray just hasn't let it go because it's safe and easy. He likes Mew, Mew doesn't like him back and that's it, he doesn't have to worry about complicated feelings. But then Sand comes along and he is unbelievable KIND and he treats Ray like a normal person, he's honest, he doesn't push back and even apologise for being nosy about Ray's mother, he worries about him when he's drunk, he talks back and he's FUN to be around, he never wanted anything from Ray even after taking him home when he was drunk, he refused to accept money from them hooking up, he gave up one of his nights to sing at Yo's bar just so he could sing at Ray's party...

I mean, since episode 1 we've been getting a look into Ray's self worth. He thinks he's worthless and a burden, probably because he's an alcoholic, and I'm sorry to say but his friends don't really help him when it comes to that. He doesn't want to keep burdening his friends with this so he turns towards Sand, hires him as his drinking buddy, to just listen to music with, have fun and relax, he even says "I just don't want to be alone." and even later on Sand sayshe can be his friend without having to hire him he even says "If you're my friend, you have to look after me in every way." and Sand does just that!

Ray is confused and he probably has never had someone to be this way towards him in his life, someone that wants to help him (with his alcoholism as well I'm fairly sure), someone that cares this much about him, but most importantly, confused as to why he's feeling this way thinking "Don't I like Mew? Why do I feel this way towards Sand?", so of course he's scared about what he's feeling and he's scared of being vulnerable and ending up being hurt, so he pushes Sand away by being mean. It's all too much for him.

What's worse is that Sand has been the only one setting up rules like the not sleeping with each other more than once, saying he'd never date someone like Ray and other less significant situations but Ray always convinces him to break those same rules (wonder why that is...) which Sand is at fault too like, my guy you need to be confident and just say no. Sand most likely set those same rules precisely because of an old relationship that started this way and ended up horribly so he's trying to not commit that same mistake again. This time I think Sand will fight back instead of just letting go like his old relationship, probably because he can tell Ray feels the same way as him.

Then we have this scene, It's a bit ambiguous because it's impossible to know exactly in what part of the timeline of this relationship this fits in but I personally like to think it's after all the fights Ray finally takes some time to think and get his feelings in order and realise what exactly Sand means to him and this is the scene where Ray goes and finds Sand to apologise and I guess 'confess'. It also fits really well with the last scene I'll talk about which is the bathtub scene.

In this scene we can clearly see Ray breaking down crying in a bathtub while Mew is hugging him from behind (in the old trailer Mew had clothes on so this doesn't really make me think much). Personally, this is probably a scene where Ray feels horrible for hurting Sand and might also be the moment he realises how he truly feels for him which of course has him feeling like this. Gut wrenching heartbreak. My friend thinks it might be a time where Sand has decided to stop talking to him, refusing to see him which could also make everything worse.

To end all of this I think it's very important to note that by no means do I think either of them are in love already but no one can deny they're clearly attracted to each other and that they have a connection, but most importantly they ARE friends and they consider themselves as such no matter what, they would do a lot of things for each other, Ray even as far as defending Sand's band to Top (it's Top we're talking about whom he hates, but nevertheless) so that's something to keep in mind.

#only friends the series #raysand #sandray #nyx speaks #really woke up and decided to type all of this out wow....

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magicaldreamfox1 · 1 year

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Do you have any vegaspete fanfic recs for someone getting into the ship?

hi! i'm so glad u asked!! i famously love having opinions and have great taste so absolutely i would love to recommend some fics!

so i don't know exactly what u're looking for and since u mentioned getting into the ship i tried to give u a wide variety of recs to choose from!

let's get started!

Plain & Pleasure (Series) by @onstoryladders

fantastic tattoo parlor au. just trust me on this it's really good

Black Velvet (Series) by @kerrikins

black velvet is a canon divergence from the ep 7 torture scene until the end of the series and it is one of the most famous works of the fandom i think. like it is to me. u can read the first two chapters of black velvet the work as a standalone but why would u am i right. don't be intimidated by the length it's amazing!

i fill you up, drink from my cup by @petes-vegas

mmmmmmm pwp? pwp. post-canon vegaspete attend an event both pissed at each other and they start trying to make each other jealous. this might have u thinking uhmmm this is getting worrying they're really doing the most is this gonna go into cheating territory? and fear not the answer is no.

in your eyes, in your arms (series) by @pressignore

great post-canon series about vegaspetemacau bonding in the hospital. very cute very fluffy 10/10 would recommend.

Blood & Lust (Series) by @kerrikins

taking a dark turn after the last one this is a series abt. horny torture. honestly all u need to know. #justvegaspetethings and so on and so forth. might be ur cup of tea might not be. only one way to find out

Visiting Home by @raelle-writing

another fluffier turn. u gotta keep up here i move fast. so this is post-canon vegaspetemacau visiting pete's grandma. everyone is experiencing feelings. look me in the eyes. do u see the tears. it's fantastic. i especially love the buildup we get thru the whole fic and it pays off so beautifully in the end and it's just. an amazing fic i loved it very much

If You Had Something To Lose by @raelle-writing

now pay attention! this is an ONGOING fic. but it makes the list bc man. MAN. so it's an au. the theerapanyakuls are in the mafia, peteporschechay are not. one evening pete finds beaten up vegas in a back alley and saves his life. love at first sight? no u misheard. horny at first sight. shenanigans ensue. raelle plays with my feelings. now disclaimer i haven't read the most recent like. 4 chapters bc i'm depressed scared of sad cliffhangers i just can't deal with it 😭😭😭. but really this fic is fantastic it had me hooked from the very beginning and it just keeps going on amazingly and i have no doubts it will continue being great until the end.

discothéque rouge by @lu-sn

now i read this one recently and yeah YEAH. classic vp shenanigans it's such a good time. post-canon mafia shenanigans starring vp.

the weight of it's like hands around my neck by @wegathpete

now listen! i'm not a member of the peteporsche ride or die besties agenda but i know a lot of people like it and this fic is just so good. i hope op knows the babygirl paragraph lives in my head rent free. it's a post-canon introspection of vegaspete which also includes porn. aren't we lucky ❤️

Silly Secrets by @raelle-writing

have u ever wondered what vegas would do if he walked in on pete's preferred exercising.... routine. well u don't have to wonder any longer! it's exactly what it says on the tin! post-canon vegas discovers pete's silly secret! whatever will he do abt it!! only one way to find out 😌😌😌

Your Secrets And Lies by @kerrikins

another banger by kerri. post-canon vegaspete in the hospital. pete thinks vegas is holding back and decides to do smthg abt it. very simple very fun!

we've now arrived at the shameless self promo part of this post!

so i happen to write as well and i happened to have written some vegaspete fics!

best stranger by me

so this is more like. vegaspete adjacent but it still counts in my humble opinion. gotta promote myself! it's set post-canon in the hospital. arm visits to check up on pete. my armpete besties agenda ❤️

after the dust has settled we must pick up the pieces by me

my most recent series i've started! it's also set post-canon and contains oneshots of moments in their lives. they can all be read as standalones but in my mind they take place in the same universe (it's not an au this is just how my mind works. they're connected but they're not connected. u know?) it's not a finished series i will be uploading new fics so feel free to subscribe to it if u would like!

i hope this helped! if u liked one fic/series specifically and want more of that kind or would like more recommendations in general feel free to ask!

#i think i gave u reading material for the next few weeks algkskfs sorry i just couldn't decide i just like them all so much!#sorry for tagging everyone but ily thank u for writing great fics 🫶#i worked on this all night i'm going to sleep good night i hope this is helpful!#vegaspete #kinnporsche #bl shows #kp fics

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meshlasolus · 2 years

Text

House Of Memories (23/?)

Obi-Wan Kenobi x Padawan!reader

Warnings: oof, drinking, pining, angst, the beginning of literal depression idk

Summary: Yours and Anakin's mission goes haywire, and you choose to deal with it, among your other problems, but going to a bar accompanied by him and his darling wife, the senator.

A/n: this is so much longer than it needs to be but you guys i saw some awesome pictures my brother took when we went to the cantina in galaxy's edge the other day and my inspiration skyrocketed so fast- also i highly recommend getting a reservation there if you can the scenery alone is worth it

Words: 4k

It had been weeks since the escapade with Satine, who you'd tried as hard as you could to push to the back of your mind. Really, you'd been trying to push her out of it, but with the murmurs of what happened with her and the Death Watch cult, she kept circulating in your thoughts from time to time.

You and Anakin had been assigned on a mission together while Ahsoka was sent to train cadets on Mandalore, and Obi-Wan was off world temporarily with Quinlan Vos. It was an easy mission, for the most part. Get in, steal information from the database, and get out. The problem with that was a man named Count Dooku, quite literally the person you despised most in the galaxy. He always acted like he was still compelled by the light side of the force, trying to regain relationships with people he once called friends. The reality of it was his need for endless power drove him to the darkness.

He had been waiting for you both upon arrival, taunting and tantalizing you both with his fancy speech, which had beat around the bush several times until he practically admitted he was prepared for your attack since the mission was set in motion. Needless to say, you failed, and both you and Anakin were taking it pretty hard. You lost a lot of clones that day, and had come home with half as many as you left with.

"It was my fault," he said, ducking his head into his hands. You scooted closer and rubbed his back in soothing circles.

"It's not. Neither of us could have possibly known that it would be a set up."

He shook his head, raising it slightly only to show you he'd been in a deep state of distress. You wrapped him up in a hug, letting his head fall on your shoulder as you kept affirming him.

He was a Jedi knight, now. A great general of the republic. He felt responsible because he had to. He hated when those feelings came over him, but every so often, something went wrong, and he couldn't help it.

"I will speak to the council when we return, if anyone gets reprimanded for this, I can take it. I've gotten sort of used to it by now," you chuckled a little, but it did little to lighten the mood. The ship was completely silent save for your conversation, and the steady whir of the engines.

"I am too, believe me. We'll go together, whatever they have to say can be said to both of us."

You silently agreed, resting a hand on his shoulder and keeping it steady for the remainder of the flight.

Well that went horrible. Absolutely horrible. Right off the bat, you mentioned that you had to crash a speeder to divert the attention of other clones getting away. Normally that would be considered a good thing, getting your men to safety and destroying enemy property while you were at it. The thing was, it was in the middle of a city, so no, it was not enemy property. You crashed a private mode of transportation. They revoked you of your piloting certification for the time being.

You were completely appalled by their decision and yelled about it to their faces. You regretted it instantly when you were done, but of course, with being a hot head, there were even more consequences. You were suspended from any and all missions until Obi-Wan returned. You stormed out of the room before they were finished and met Anakin in the hallway when he was done.

He didn't look so happy either; when he told you the reason why, you felt bad for him.

"You didn't need to stand up for me. It's clear they hate us both, and when we gang up on them, they despise us entirely," you threw your head back against the wall, the sting of the cold metal was distracting, for a few short seconds. You needed something to take your mind off this whole thing, and your usual solution was off world, probably not to return until tomorrow at the earliest. You doubted leaning on Obi-Wan's shoulder while he read in the library was going to help you with this much stress anyway.

You weren't sure where the urge came from, but you wanted to go out and get drunk, something Jedi were never supposed to do. You were to be alert and sober at all times, being the perfect symbol of a protector should anyone need you... but you'd been suspended temporarily, and Anakin was to take a short break from missions as well.

"Is Padme in the city?" you asked, wondering if maybe she could get you both into one of the more high-end clubs on this side of Coruscant.

"She is, but only until tomorrow. She has business to attend to back on Naboo. I'll probably be escorting her," he said, leaning against the same wall that you were, and you began to smirk with your eyes closed.

"Perfect."

"Oh no, what are you thinking?"

Oh no was a bit of a stretch, because once you'd explained to him your intentions, he was very keen to oblige you. It seemed impossible to not have fun when you had your favorite people with you, in an environment that was made for losing control and having the best time you can possibly have.

You'd never drunk anything really heavy before, although some of the older Padawans in the temple had taken you and Anakin out before to do some secret drinking, you weren't sure how much you could handle. You were almost positive that based on the strength and endurance of your right mind alone, you wouldn't be a light weight. You just hoped you'd be able to walk into your apartment again tonight without stumbling into someone. All you needed was to get drunk and crash into Mace Windu upon entering the place. You'd be expelled for sure... or at least until Obi-Wan got back, protesting until you were reinstated.

You hated hiding behind him all the time, because you wanted to prove to others that you were strong and capable enough to handle your own battles, but at the same time, you knew battling the council was a losing game, and that the only hope you had of defeating them was to let Obi-Wan save you. He didn't mind saving you all the time, which you appreciated, but often wondered about. It could not possibly be energizing to argue over the sake of another human being, and yet, he did. It must be exhausting to defend you on the daily. You'd have to find a way to thank him some time for it.

"Here, try this," Anakin slid you something in a tall glass, bright yellow in color and glowing against the steal countertop.

You raised an eyebrow before taking it in your hands to inspect it first. You sniffed it once, deeming it very acidic, before scrunching up your face and letting out a breath, downing it anyway.

Anakin looked surprised, his eyes wide and his jaw slack as he watched your reaction to that much alcohol at once. You cringed, the sting of it going down your throat was not pleasant, and not something you were used to, but in a few seconds, you already began to feel the tingling effects of it in your bloodstream. The energy, the cloudiness, the intoxication.

"Well, you weren't supposed to have the whole thing at once," he commented, but it was already far too late for that. Padme came up behind him, her shimmering evening dress was very beautiful under the lights. She watched on with concern for you, knowing you weren't like this usually, and if you were willing to do something Obi-Wan didn't want you doing, your mind must have really needed an escape.

"I think that's enough to drink for you," she took the glass from your hand and shoved it in the direction on the bar tender, who grabbed it and flipped it up onto the rack with ease. He was putting on some sort of a show to impress the patrons, throwing drink mixers, washing glasses, and serving guests, all while paying close attention to the Jedi visitors who had never been in here before.

"No, I need more. I can still think straight," you joked, your laughter carrying over a little too long for you to be considered sober. You weren't a lightweight per say, but perhaps just easily tipsy.

"That's the point. We don't want you in any more trouble with the council, and what about Obi-Wan? You know he wouldn't approve of you doing this," Padme was trying to be the voice of reason but was having a very hard time doing so when a half-drunk Anakin started pressing soft kisses into the crook of her neck.

"If he were here, I wouldn't be," you scoffed, turning to the tender and ordering another drink. Something small, but strong. "And besides, you might wanna get him home before he gets too handsy in public. I'll take the tram back to the temple when I'm done, I promise."

Your word of being responsible didn't quite ease her mind, but she almost considered it, seeing as Anakin was getting a little bit too intoxicated to function. She shook her head, standing her ground and breaking away from Anakin as she came right beside you. She knew that some of the patrons here were more often than not disrespectful to women, and even though you had a lightsaber strapped to your hip, it wasn't always enough when you were alone, much less drunk.

"Stay here, don't drink anything else until I get back," she said with a pointed finger. You put your arms up in fake surrender before watching her leave to a corner of the club, taking her holo-transmitter in hand.

You took the drink that the bar tender slid to you, nodding in thanks before tipping it to your mouth.

"I'm not a snitch, but you really shouldn't drink anything until she's back. She has a way of knowing things. She'll get very angry very fast when she finds out."

"If," you corrected him, "if she finds out. And besides, I have a way of knowing things, too."

"Yes, I believe that's called the force. She doesn't need it, she just knows."

You slammed back the green liquid, feeling a burn that not only hit your throat, but made your eyes water slightly. It was pain, but it was different pain. The type of pain you inflict on yourself just because it feels good.

"Well, that could be because you're married to her," you joked, feeling the buzz circulate your head more. You weren't able to quite get to a place of drunkenness, and you were upset about it. Anakin didn't ever seem like he was able to, either. You supposed beings with higher M counts were less susceptible to the aftereffects of being intoxicated. It made sense. The force was the base of all existing life, and you both were practically super-powered by it. It probably gave you a bit more immunity in order to protect your mind.

"Or because I've seen her in the senate, I'm telling you... she just knows."

"Alright then, let's have another drink together, see if she knows about it when she gets back," you said, haling over the bar tender to top both you and Anakin off yet again. He did so quickly and efficiently, and in no time, you were clinking glasses, downing the liquid as fast as you could. You were done first, and you chalked that up to Anakin being slow at ingesting literally anything. You remembered how long it would take him just to finish a glass of Bantha milk when you both were kids.

You were about to set your glasses back down on the counter when you both felt a hard smack come across the back of your heads.

Ow..

"I told you not to drink anymore," she said, her voice becoming a bit louder than it usually was. She was by no means a quiet person, as a senator she was loud and well spoken, but now she was just loud. "And you, need I remind you that she is your responsibility till Obi-Wan gets here?"

"I'm not anyone's responsibility but my own, besides, Anakin should honestly-" you paused mid-sentence, cutting yourself off to rethink about her last words. "I'm sorry, did you say here? As in he's coming to this bar?"

"I just got off a transmission with him. He's back on Coruscant early."

You dropped your jaw, looking at her like she'd done something unbearable. You raised your hands up and pretended to crush something in them, your face doing a good enough job of conveying to her your emotions without words, although you still had quite some words to say.

"I can't believe you called him," you stressed, being overly dramatic in your hand motions as you continued. "I'm going to be punished for the rest of my life! I'll never become a knight! I'll probably never see the light of tomorrow!"

"Oh, calm down, he wasn't mad," she explained her face was as dull as could be, and Anakin was watching from behind her in pure amusement. He knew he shouldn't be laughing, but the scene you were causing on this side of the bar was definitely cheering him up from the events of today.

"You don't know what Obi-Wan looks like when he's mad," you told her, but she was right. When she called him, he had shown no signs of hostility, or even anger at your situation.

"Maybe not, but I know what he looks like when he's concerned."

You shut up for a moment, some of the alcohol beginning to take effect, not so much in slurring your speech, or slowing your reaction time, but in making your thoughts spin around in your head like a blender.

"He'll be here any minute, and I don't think you want to be here when he shows," she turned to Anakin, handing her the ignition pod for the speeder you all took here. "Go out and wait for me, and don't even think about flying."

He dropped his shoulders, realizing the fun of the evening was coming to an end. He understood she was being wise in making sure you were delivered into the hands of Obi-Wan safely, but he didn't understand why he had to leave. Oh, yes, he did. Obi-Wan wouldn't yell at you in public, but he'd never had to twice about giving Anakin an earful when he did something stupid.

Now that he knew of Obi-Wan's feelings for you, he knew that it would enrage his old master to know that Anakin took you out drinking, even though it was your idea.

"Would you like to enlighten me on the real reason Anakin suggested we come here?" she had a mothering tone, almost. It was funny, your lack of mother figure caused you to see it in even your closest of friends, heck, even Ahsoka, who stood several years younger than you could remind you of a mom sometimes.

"I would not," you said, your head becoming a little lighter as your eyes began to see the lights in the room a little differently. You mind was becoming fuzzy, but not blurred. You weren't drunk, but you were still quite far from sober.

"Are you doing this out of spite?" She was guessing now, seeing if she could get anything out of you. For her sake of sleeping tonight, she wanted to know this wasn't an actual issue. "Look, I know how you feel about him, but this isn't going to get his attention in a good way."

"That's not why I'm doing it," you said, finally turning to look at her and give her the real reason why you were here, why she was here, and why Anakin had been here. "I need him to see that I'm old enough to make my own decisions. I want him to trust me to make them myself and not hover over my shoulder to keep watch."

"He does trust you to make you own decisions, but it disappoints him when you make bad ones."

You understood what she was saying but didn't want to take it into consideration. You knew Obi-Wan was probably going to give you a lecture this evening on the dangers of your behavior, it was inevitable.

"This is a bad decision then, hmm?" you weren't mad at her, but your intoxicated mind was not able to filter the tone in which the words were spoken. It came out harsher than you had intended.

"It was a decision you made without thinking, which is another reason why he's disappointed. He loves you more than you know, and he only wants what's best for you."

You scoffed, beginning to sip the water that Padme had set in front of you, trying to help sober your mind a bit more. Not that you were all too affected to begin with.

"He doesn't love me, he can't," you knew what she meant, but the lines of love in your mind had been running an awful close stretch lately, and you wanted to bring it up just so you could tell her how much you hated yourself for it. "He can never be with me the way I want him to be."

"If I've learned anything from Obi-Wan, it's that only a Sith deals in absolutes. Just look at Anakin and I... How can you be so sure he'll never consider it?" She made a valiant point there, but you had something she did not yet know about.

"Why don't you ask your dear friend Satine Kryze?" You looked back ahead of you, clenching your jaw after that name left your lips. They tasted bad, the words that were her name. You didn't like letting them loose from your mouth.

"The duchess?" She asked confused. She furrowed her brows, shaking her head as if what you said was crazy. Maybe you were really drunk.

"Mhm, from what I understand, she and my Master have some complicated history."

Oh, she thought. You were jealous and having learned about the man your affections lied with having perhaps a past relationship with a woman who has since made her way back into his life, you weren't handling it well.

"Were they-?"

"Yep." you said shortly, the word cutting off any chances of her finishing that sentence. You hated that it was reality. You wished she didn't exist. You wished Satine Kryze had never been born, or better yet, you wished that her assassination attempts had been successful. You wished you hadn't helped Obi-Wan save her.... but you always helped him, no matter the cost.

"I'm sorry," she said, finally understanding what this whole entire escapade was about. The jealousy, the need for independence, the craving of something to intoxicate your mind. It all made sense, now. She was regretting calling Obi-Wan, but perhaps the best thing for you would be to talk it out.

"Yeah, me too."

It was then, you sensed a familiar presence enter the doorway, and upon seeing you look over, Padme mimicked your actions and her eyeline met with Obi-Wan, who indeed, was not angry. He wore a look of concern and fear on his face and making eye contact with you seemed to dull that if only a little.

The ride back to the temple was completely silent, as you sensed he thought you were drunk, and not coherent enough to listen to his words deeply enough if he spoke to you. You could have easily mended that, asking him about his mission, but you were far too focused on avoiding getting reprimanded.

He didn't say anything to you until he got you home, into the main room of your apartment. He stripped you of your cloak, hanging it by the doorway and watching you take a seat on the couch. It was only then he realized you were sober enough to understand what you'd done, and you were readying yourself to speak with him about it.

He didn't even know how to start; how should he start? In all the years he'd trained you, you'd never done anything truly bad or disobedient to the rules. You and Anakin were plenty mischievous, but you weren't bad. You were his beam of light, that could do no wrong. The one who made him feel like maybe hope was more existent in what seemed like an endless war. You were the optimist, the encourager, and as he always said, you were the light incarnate.

"Little one," he sat down across from you and sensed your guilt. It was only now that he felt it in rippling waves, and he figured it was because only now, when you were home and, in his presence, that you really thought about your actions. "I know that you're not one to act so impulsively like this. Something is bothering you, and I can't help you unless you tell me what it is."

"You can't help me with this, master."

His heart cracked a little at hearing the formal term you'd used with him. You were shutting up all your walls, making it impossible for him to even find a trace of evidence as to what could possibly be driving you towards these actions.

He moved from his seat to kneel in front of you, lifting your head so that your eyes were visible. They were filled with unshed tears, but you would not let them fall. You'd cried in front of him countless times before, but now you held them back, trying to avoid any signs of weakness. He'd already seen many, though. He didn't care; he wanted to help you, to make all your problems go away. You loved him for it. For many reasons among that, of which you were too tired to name.

"Let me try," he was looking at you with something you hadn't seen in his eyes before. He seemed to be concerned, but more than that, he seemed angry. Not at you, but at whatever was making you feel this way. "Please."

And then the tears were coming, pouring out in droves that you could not control even if you wished you could. It hurt so badly to think the man before you were the reason for these tears, because he had done nothing but be kind and good to you for all the days of your life. It was only because of your stupid feelings that he made you cry. If only he knew.

"Hold me," you whispered, closing your eyes and waiting for a response. He instantly came to your side and clung to you, whatever you needed. He pulled you into his chest, and tightly tucked you in his embrace. He wouldn't be letting go anytime soon, and he was just fine with it. "I'm sorry."

He wanted to say not to apologize, that it was okay, and you were going to be alright, but he wasn't actually sure of any of those things. He couldn't be. You were going through something horrible, and refused to tell him what it was, so how could everything be, okay?

"I know it seems like you have to go through this alone, but you don't. Whatever it is, tell me, I promise you I will do my best to fix it."

You didn't want him to keep fixing things for you. He did it because he loved you, but you didn't know that. You thought he did it because he didn't trust you to do it yourself. The thing in question, though, of which needed fixing, he couldn't truly fix if he wanted to. You had no idea why he did the things he did. You didn't know it was because he would move mountains and earth to make you happy. You only knew that your master cared for you far beyond what anyone else in the galaxy possibly could.

"I can't be fixed," you told him through your tears.

Love me, that's all I ask for. Then everything will be fixed. Then everything will be okay.

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