Tumgik
#like dude i dont even think i'm all that funny
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one time my sister’s family was visiting and my brother in law asked what I do currently for a living and so I said online artisan sales and also streaming games on twitch
and he asked me that “oh are you really good at the game or just funny” and there is no recovering from getting clowned on a level of replying “.... I guess I’m funny”
like zero malice from the guy, holy shit it was something else
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hotvintagepoll · 1 month
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Propaganda
Greta Garbo (Camille, Anna Karenina, Queen Christina)—Enigmatic and alluring and made me bisexual. The perfect example of the eroticism in silent films that literally transcends text. Could literally not change anything about her expression but you knew by looking at her eyes what she was thinking. She’s so gorgeous.
Audrey Hepburn (My Fair Lady, Sabrina, Roman Holiday)—Growing up, Audrey Hepburn desperately wanting to be a professional ballerina, but she was starved during WWII and couldn't pursue her dream due to the effects of malnourishment. After she was cast in Roman Holiday, she skyrocketed to fame, and appeared in classics like My Fair Lady and Breakfast at Tiffany's. She's gorgeous, and mixes humor and class in all of her performances. After the majority of her acting career came to close, she became a UNICEF ambassador.
This is round 5 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.
[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]
Garbo:
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A cold-ass Swedish WLW Sphinx. Had plans to murder Hitler that she never got around to. "She will remain always a child of vikings, moved about by a snowy dream."
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First of all, she's on the money; that's how much of a treasure she is. She's beautiful in such a distinct way you need very few lines to draw her. (Drawing by Einar Nerman) She managed to be mesmerizing in both silent and sound films. She kissed a woman in Queen Christina (and probably several more in real life). She was super dry and really funny in Ninotchka. She got the hell out of Hollywood and stayed out, living for almost 50 years after her retirement.
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Garbo is one of the many reasons why I'm gay. If you haven't seen Queen Christina please do, She is so gender in that film. Also her accent makes it sound like she's always talking in cursive and it's so hypnotic (or at least I think so).
She's a gay introvert, like all of us here on Tumblr.
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Probably a lesbian, absolutely a mood when she retired
Mysterious and aloof, charismatic and enigmatic, with beautiful androgynous characteristics, Garbo is undoubtedly the most eccentric and unique Hollywood vintage star. Her aversion to fame and stardom makes her even more desirable to the audience, and her insane chemistry with the camera, an actress one of a kind! Her particularity and her oddity is what discerns her strongly from her hollywood co workers at the time, noone was like her and would never be like her. I think, to the utmost extent, that she deserves the title of the hottest vintage star, even though that would be an understatement of what she is!
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SO gorgeous, her thick Swedish accent makes will turn your brain into pudding
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Audrey Hepburn:
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"She may be a wispy, thin little thing, but when you see that girl, you know you're really in the presence of something. In that league there's only ever been Garbo, and the other Hepburn, and maybe Bergman. It's a rare quality, but boy, do you know when you've found it." - Billy Wilder
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Raised money for the resistance in nazi occupied Hungary. Became a humanitarian after retiring. Two very sexy things to do!
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where to begin......... i wont her so bad. i literally dont know what to say.
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My dude. The big doe eyes, the cheekbones, the voice. The flawless way she carried herself. She was never in a movie where she wasn't drop dead gorgeous. Oh, also the fact she raised funds against the Nazis doing BALLET and she won the Presidential Medal of Freedom for her humanitarian work.
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"It’s as if she dropped out of the sky into the ’50s, half wood-nymph, half princess, and then disappeared in her golden coach, wearing her glass slippers and leaving no footprints." - Molly Haskell
"All I want for Christmas is to make another movie with Audrey Hepburn." - Cary Grant
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I know people nowadays are probably sick of seeing her with all the beauty and fashion merch around that depicts her and/or Marilyn Monroe but she is considered a classic Hollywood beauty for a reason. Ironically in her day she was more of the alternative beauty when compared to many of her contemporaries. She always came off with such elegance and grace, and she was so charming. Apparently she was a delight to work with considering how many of her co-stars had wonderful things to say about her. Outside of her beauty and acting ability she was immensely kind. She helped raise funds for the Dutch resistance during WWII by putting on underground dance performances as well as volunteering at hospitals and other small things to help the resistance. During her Hollywood career and later years she worked with UNICEF a lot. Just an all around beautiful person both inside and out.
youtube
No one could wear clothes in this era like she could. She was every major designer's favorite star and as such her films are time capsules of high fashion at the time. But beyond that, she had such an elegance in her screen presence that belied a broad range of ability. From a naive princess, to a confused widow, to a loving and mischievous daughter, she could play it all.
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Look at that woman's neck. Don't you want to bite it?
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emphistic · 2 months
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"Buttface"
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Things Reader Should Acknowledge: I THINK IVE FINALLY GOTTEN THE HANG OF TUMBLR (hip hip hooray!), i plan on having yuuji being sukuna's baby brother, however, yuuji hasnt been born yet
Prologue: Ever since Sukuna moved in next door, you two have grown closer. Like, impossibly close. One might even call you two "friends;" albeit Sukuna would always shut that idea down. But one thing Sukuna wouldn't shut down? — is that he loves to see you smile. And he would do anything to hear your laugh, over and over again.
A/N: this is in the same universe as "I'm Lactose Intolerant", and while the ages of sukuna and reader dont really matter here, i wrote this with the idea of sukuna being 14 years old and reader is 13 years old (feel free to change that to whatever you desire), brownie points to whoever recognizes the movie that sukuna and reader are watching
Please REFRAIN from REPOSTING MY WORK (REBLOGS ARE EXEMPTED FROM THIS RULE)
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"This movie is stupid."
"You think everything is stupid, Stupid." You quip back, flicking Sukuna's forehead.
"Touché." He scoffs, and crosses his arms over his chest before leaning further back into the couch. You put your legs on his lap.
You grin to yourself, wondering if he really didn't notice that you called him by the name "Stupid". Then you think, he's probably just in a good mood, and go back to watching the comedy playing on the screen.
"I mean, how can it take you so long to figure out that someone who looks exactly like you is actually your long lost twin sister?" Sukuna moves his hand around to somehow make his point seem more valid.
"Besides, isn't this supposed to be a comedy? Where's the humor in this? This isn't funny, at all," Sukuna drones on — until you decide that you've finally had enough.
"This isn't funny? Well . . . it's not like you're funny, either." You stick your tongue out at Sukuna, in a teasing manner — to which he does the same.
"That's just what you think. I bet you didn't even know that all your friends come to me during break just to listen to me talk. In fact, most of the time, I'm not even trying to joke around, I'm just that naturally funny," Sukuna wore a smug look on his face.
"Sure, 'Kuna. They're just laughing because you have such a funny face. Sometimes I even get you mixed up with a chihuahua, you know."
"Oh really?" Sukuna glares at you, and gets closer to your face.
You copy him, "Yes — really."
At this point, the tips of your guys' noses were just centimeters away from touching. You could practically feel his warm breath on your face.
Woah.
Now you could hear your own breathing quicken.
Since when were Sukuna's eyes so red?
Your cheeks felt warm.
Why are his eyes so, so—?
"Buttface." Sukuna interrupts the silence.
You get pulled back to reality. "What did you just call me!?"
"What, you deaf now? I called you 'buttface,' Dumbass."
"Seriously, someone needs to control your vocabulary."
"Pft, I don't need any controlling."
You laughed, "Sure, Sukuna. Sure."
The movie ended, and the credits rolled. Sukuna grabbed the remote and turned the TV off, before getting off the couch.
"Want something to drink?" He peered over his shoulder at you, raising a brow.
"Ah, sure. Lemonade."
"Too bad, I ain't getting it for you," Sukuna stuffed his hands into the pockets of his sweats and walked off — to the kitchen, you assumed.
You grumbled, and threw a pillow at his back. It just bounced off, though, and you sighed.
He returned minutes later, with a glass of lemonade in his hand. Which was a clear sign he was trying to aggravate you, because he's expressed multiple times his strong detesting of the refreshing drink. (You completely disagree with him, by the way.)
"Dude, seriously?" You frowned.
"Totally serious. I mean, I couldn't resist. This glass of lemonade was just calling my name." He took a sip.
"It is so good."
Another sip.
"Shame you don't have a glass yourself."
And another sip.
You were practically ripping out your hair at this point. "C'mon, 'Kuna. If you won't get me a glass, can I just have a tiny sip of yours?" You entreated him with all your might.
Sukuna rubbed his chin with his thumb and index finger, pretending to think about his decision. Finally, he said, "What's with that name you keep calling me? And — what's the magic word?"
You huffed, "Please?"
He gestured for you to go on.
You clasped your hands together in a desperate, beggar-like manner. "Pretty please, Sukuna? Just a teensy weensy sip? For poor ol' me."
"Hmm, let me think. How about . . . no."
You gawked at the pink haired boy.
"WHAT."
"You heard me."
"Aghhh!" You jumped on Sukuna, trying to grab the glass of lemonade yourself. If he wasn't going to share, you just had to take matters into your own hands — literally.
Your attempts were fruitless, however; Sukuna just kept on raising the glass higher and higher above his head, to the point you couldn't even reach his wrist. Damn him and his stupid growth spurt.
His hand starts to shake as you try to climb him like a tree. Next thing you know, your wish is answered. You got your lemonade. Except, not in the way you had hoped. The lemonade was everywhere. On your clothes, Sukuna's clothes, the couch, everywhere.
"Oh shit." This time, you didn't correct Sukuna's obscene language.
The room became so silent that you would be able to hear a pin drop.
"Sukuna!" You whisper-shout. (You had no idea why you were whispering.)
"Don't look at me, this was your fault!" His hand still held the now empty glass.
"Me? This was all you," you retorted, jabbing a finger into the older boy's chest.
"Sureee, Y/N. Let's just forget about the fact that you were practically climbing my body."
You blushed.
"You could've just gotten your own cup of lemonade, but no, you just had to spill mine."
You scoffed, "Well, you could've shared, but you didn't — because your shellfish."
Sukuna looked at you funny, "Do you mean 'selfish'?"
"Same thing, you know I make mistakes with pronunciation."
He shrugged. Then, a great idea popped into your head.
"Your mess," you exclaim, before pushing off of Sukuna and darting away, only to be pulled back by your hood.
"Hey!" You shout, falling back onto Sukuna's chest.
"This is your mess. You caused this, remember?"
You groaned, turned around, and tackled Sukuna. You guys ended up rolling off the couch altogether. Pillows were thrown, and the lemonade spread onto the carpet.
"Let go of my foot, you big oaf!" You yelled, shoving at Sukuna's face.
"Not until you admit this was all your fault." He continued to wrestle with you on the ground.
"In. your. dreams."
You guys continued to fight, which made the mess even bigger. It felt like hours had passed. Hours where you still didn't get even a sip of lemonade. Then, you heard the sound of keys, and next thing you know; your parents walked in.
Your heartbeat hammered in your chest.
Your mom and dad took one good look at the two of you on the floor, and your mom said, "Knock it off, you two. And clean up the couch. I don't want my living room smelling like lemonade for the rest of the year." They walked into the kitchen.
You turned back to look at Sukuna, just to find him already staring at you. You guys continued to stare at each other before bursting out into laughter. Tears were basically streaming down the both of your guys' faces at this point.
Your mom yelled from the kitchen, "Ah, young love these days. So different from us — right, honey?" Your dad responded with a loud chuckle.
Looking down, you realized the position you were in. Sukuna lying on his back beneath you, while you were sitting on top of him. The expression on your face immediately soured.
You and Sukuna pulled away from each other in record timing, both of your expressions clearly, visibly flustered.
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drawlody · 2 months
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My list of Adam ships♡ n my opinion bout them (also fics rec :D)
Adam x Luicfer (Adamsapple/Duitarduck) 10/10
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Need i say more:)))??!?! started out as a "haha funny slip-up ship" to "hey they got really good angst potential". The friends/lovers to enemies to lovers is STRONG with this one n i am eating up everything i could found on ao3. Smth bout this macho-ass man finally getting to stay back n not take charge for once feel nice, also princess Adam supermacy wooooo. Whoever came up with the ship name i applaud u cause that's like a 3 layers name(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧
It's not an Adamsapple fic without Adam having at least 1 mental breakdown n Lucifer have his guilt eating him alive:)))
Very fucked up torture but i swear it worth the pain:D The dove is so dead it start to rot so plz read the tags properly (plz check out the AngeliaDark other works too they got good shit)
This one have a splits so check out both the fics (beware the author have a skrewed sense of what is considered wholesome:))))
I didnt think a smut scene could be this sad
Adam x Lute (Guitarspear/Guardrock) 10/10
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Litteraly my first Hazbin ship, assholes in love is an underrated dynamic we desperately need more off:))) That with a dash of evil dude x loyal subordinate (which i havent seen since the Deathglare days) n opposite attract (look they have one main thing in common is that their extreme bloodthirst, other than that she's stricter than ur mom n he's lazier than the Sloth ring itself but that the beauty of it no? He convince her to chill tf out n not to burst a blood vessel, she keep him on track n make sure Sera dont come on their asses)
They're just being silly enabling each other terrible behaviour n i love that for them (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ) Litteral besties i tell ya
Heavy non-con shit involving Val but Lute will revenge our boi i promised u that
Cool idea n they r just made for each other damn
First hazbin fic i read which is a really cool smut:D
Adam x Micheal (we need a ship name people ) (update: it's Songbird/Guitarhero) 10/10
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I like how we dont even got a proper comfirmation of Micheal design/personality yet the ship is here already ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ( im using the Nakariiale's design as a base here love their design)
Hit me with that rebound love x "u look like my ex so im using u as a replacement but ill fall for the real u eventually" x co-workers in heaven. I'm thinking smth along the line of "after Lucifer fucked off with Lilith, Micheal became Adam guardian angel n they just hang out" ya feel me here? (✿◕‿◕✿)
Shout out to Bloog_b for dragging me into this ship:DDD also im on the Adam x the archangels ship as a "gotcha" to Lucifer of sort. Like bitch u stole my wives imma steal your brotherS
Look it's Adamsapple endgame but trust me u will be feed well on this ( u know how good u gotta be for people to ditch the main ship?)
I'm giving yall 4 fics here cause i can only found 4 rn(._. )
this one is uhh non-con so beware
Micheal is indeed Adam guardian angel in this one:D
Adam x Eve (Flowertunes) 8/10
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I dont care what yall said they love each other throughout Eden n Earth , might have a falling out in heaven but that doesnt change the fact that they were once IN LOVE. Honestly why cant we just have a couple that have the same bright-eyed innocence like one another.I refuse to believe Eve like willingly cheat on Adam with malicious intent n all, simply she was indeed ''tricked'' or just not fully understand the sistuation, n Adam love her way too much to think that she would do that to him like Lilith. Hell the dude was heartbroken after L left , starting the abandonment issues, so he would have cling to Eve, doing everything so that he aint alone again, even if that mean leaving Eden
Honestly it pisses me off that the Adam/Eve tag on ao3 most of the time is just 1 dialouge between them back when Eve bit the apple n thats it no elaboration on the couple whatsoever >:(((
Lots of switcharoos
sinner eve woooo
look its hard trynna find a fic focusing on them ok?
Adam x St. Peter (Guitargreeter (bet ya didnt see that coming:))) 7/10
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Base on this fanfic alone Joe my dude u r on the path of becoming THE Adam crack-ship writer n i am here for this:)))) just so u wait this dude gonna whip out a AdamxNifty , AdamxHusk fic later on ( •̀ ω •́ )✧
From within the fic itself the ship its 2 bros in love with homophobia standing in the way >:( also when did we have a name?!?!?!?
I just like Adam x anyone in heaven alright:D like bro famous n he got that ancient rizz, u telling mr he cant bag a hottie or 2-100+ hmm?
Adam x Alastor (Angelicradio) 8/10
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I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT ABOUT THEM THAT I SHIP I JUST DO φ(゜▽゜*)♪ i blame YOU honestly rn this ship is either Adam found Al after the fight n they make a deal or they're in heaven n they chillin this ship is confusing:D
They're angels on heaven
Adam gone back into eden n do shit differently
This is both Adam/Eve n Adam/Alastor kinda
Adam x Alastor x Lucifer (Angelicradioapple/ Charlie's dads (only me call them that lol)) 9/10
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''Hey Charlie u know how u r sad that your mother left? Wellllllll i got you 2 new dads suprise:DDDD''
Look 3 miserable men who hate each other + hell's greatest dad + my love for Dadam = Messy ass old men yaoi :DDDD n it work perfectly with Alastor Asexuality too!!! Like Adam n Lucifer could fuck each other brains out before Al joining in for the cuddles lol
Chaos ensue
Not exactly a love triangle but a love corner but hey we barely got food here :D
I cant believe how hot this shit is lol
Adam x Eve x Lilith x Lucifer (Eden poly/ applecore?) 8/10
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They could have been all married to each other(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ But as much as i go "OooOooo Poly yay'' i just cant vibe with EvexLucifer, like the cheating vibes is wayyyyyyyyy too much i just cant man . I mean with the interpetation that Lucifer came to Eden to hang out with the humans they all know eachother, they're a throuple yes but BUT when Eve came into the picture it was only with Adam n him only so the other 2 is ehhhh. Im fine with EvexLilith cause im seeing it happening later, not hidden from Adam while LuciferxEve got that deception going on .So uhhh in this ship they're more like bestie than lovers to me¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Also AdamxLilith is an underrated pairing like everytime i saw this applecore thing going on these 2 r at most tolerate each other like cmonnnnn we already twist this to hell n back, why cant we make it so their arguement was a petty non-malicious one n they still cares for each other hmm???
They're one happy family
IDK what to tell u bittersweet reunion n loving family is the only typa fic u get with this ship
Not that im complaining i need this wholesomeness
Adam x Mammon (Adammon/Madam/Greedyguitar/ 1st chirstmas.... hasnt had an offical name yet) 10/10
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They r litteraly same person different font idk what to tell u. More insults thrown around than Guitarspear but they're pretty similar. Adam is just " sinners suck ass but this dude is the worst in the best way". Also they're both big bois (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧ , they love towering over others
I'm sorry but there r barely BARELY
any fics of them :(
The art side is more plentiful tho :D
Adam x Angel Dust (Holydust/guitardust) 5/10
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THEY ARE BESTIES YOUR HONOUR n that the exact reason why i cant see them be together as a couple 100%, like the shit-talking bff vibes r wayyyy too strong XD Angel finally got someone who have the same vulgar humour as him n if Adam got married in hell Angel would 100% be his best bitch of honour (≧∀≦)ゞq(≧▽≦q)
They're best friends who have casual no-string attached sex that is ACTUALLY no-string attached:)))
I came to ship them due to those "What if they're co-workers under Val' scenarios ive been seeing on Tumblr
I got like 1 fic on ao3 i mean if u r looking for just platonic friendship between them then rest asure most Adam's redemption fics have that
I got 1 fic on tumblr
Adam x Charlie (Charadam/Guitarprincess) 5/10
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U know this ship give me a pretty bad first impression since a good chunk of the fics r either heavy non-con shit or lean wayyyyy to much into the daddy kink, ya know how Charlie got suppose daddy issues n all that jazz?:))) yeah that... that
But after seeing the art side of this ship im chillin with them now, since the art r pretty wholesome, usually having them decked out in punk-rock clothings hanging out. It's a big "Fuck you" to Lucifer n i live for these mf argueing ╰(*°▽°*)╯
So uhhh stay away from the fics if ya want an actual functional couple instead of wtv messed up shit we got there:))) But here's a fic anyway, the only one where it feel bearable n actual trynna go into said messed up relationship i already warn you
We got cracks like Guitarmaid (AdamxNifty), Valadam (AdamxVal) which i dont have enough materials to decied, Classicalrock (AdamxSera) sound interesting but also havent found anything , Guitarhalo (AdamxEmily) is an unexpected find, find i deem them to be more familial than romantic so we'll see if there's a fic good enough to convince me
Edit:i forgot to add Blitzo like Mammon already there why did i forgot
Adam x Blitzo (i dont think anyone even ship this but me:)) 7/10
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I cant find a single fic where they has anything more than a 1 nightstand n 1 interaction where they hit it off , i live off imagination alone (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`) but like fr fr they would match so well, like their bloodlust n general jerkiness would make them the 3rd asshole x asshole ship on this list :DDDD
Tho as much as i wanna see them go further i feel like an on-n-off relationship/friends with benefits fit em more ya know ( *^-^)ρ(*╯^╰) If ya have any fic but the 2 here that have them interact lemme know cause a bitch need food :)
This is a lot of tag(._. )
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flashbangstars · 4 months
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How People Found out you two were dating
NCT Dream Edition
pink ~ y/n
Blue ~ dream
Green ~ secondary character/another dreamie
Mark
"so um Jeno found out about us dating"
"oh, I thought we were waiting until game night to tell them"
"well yeah uh funny story, I tried to put my sweatshirt on at Jeno's house and your hot pink thong fell out of the sleeve onto his carpet."
"I WAS WONDERING WHERE THAT WENT"
"Yeah I know me too, besides that. Jeno got mad and lectured me on not leading you on if I had other girls I was doing stuff with, so I uh.."
"you told Jeno the hot pink thong was mine"
"yeah basically"
"and I have to face him on friday knowing he's seen my panties"
"to be fair he did say they were cute"
"you know that actually didn't help at all"
Renjun
"hey babe can you help me really quickly, I need help moving my monitor, the cord is stuck somewhere behind my desk"
"Y/n can it wait like 10 minutes"
"No it literally can't I have a assignment due in thirty minutes and I will literally jump off a fucking cliff if I don't get full credit for this"
"Nice Hello Kitty Underwear"
"Renjun you're the one who bought me these, you've seen them and taken them off me numerous times"
"oh he has!! has he!"
"go put some pants on please sweetheart"
"I'm so fucking terrified why were their two different voices just now"
"Hi y/n"
"I'm gonna start crying please tell me Jaemin didn't just see me in fucking hello kitty underwear"
"Y/n please go put some pants on"
"yeah....yeah I'll go do that...... Uh just so you know....im not letting him hit for free.....he did ask me out"
"congrats to the happy couple"
"fuck you"
Jeno
"so how did you all manage to fail the same test?"
"I cheated off of Haechan, and Haechan Cheated off of Jaemin, so its basically Jaemin's fault"
"hey I thought Jaemin knew what he was doing"
"Haechan, Jaemin never knows what he is doing"
"fair"
"oh fuck, I have to go babe I'm gonna miss the bus if I dont run, I will see you soon" *phatass smooch before leaving* *leaves*
5 minutes later....
"alright I'm back I missed the bus"
"DID YALL JUST FUCKING KISS?"
"....no"
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN NO I FUCKING WATCHED IT HAPPEN"
"oh thats so crazy I think I just heard the bus, I have to go omg byeeeeee"
"so you're leaving me to deal with this"
"yes, bye pookie, smooches I'll see you later tonight, bye Haechan!"
Haechan
"are we gonna talk about it... or should I just ignore it"
"ignore what"
"im not following"
"are you two being serious"
"dude what the fuck are you talking about??"
"Haechan."
"what"
"you've been sitting in y/n's lap the entire time we've been here"
"and...?"
"we are literally just close friends"
"dog you are literally hand feeding haechan french fries"
"im literally baby"
"even that was a lot for me"
"im sorry pookie"
"allllriight get off, I wont be this couple"
"pookie did you just make it official!"
"can you please be normal"
Jaemin
"Hypothetically what do you guys consider too much for a gift for your significant other"
"well how long would you two have been dating"
"like 6 months...?"
"umm anything ring related, thats kinda scary, too reminiscent of marriage"
"well fuck"
"what do you mean oh fuck? what the fuck did you buy"
"a ring"
"what"
"what...."
"for who??"
"y/n"
"WHAT"
"Y/N?"
"WHY?"
"YOU'VE BEEN DATING FOR 6 MONTHS?"
"STOP YELLING AT ME"
Chenle
"the guys know you and me are dating"
"what? how"
"I got in trouble"
"what did you do..."
"they all got kinda mad at me and said I was kinda mean to you and asked what my issue with you was"
"and what did you say"
"please don't be mad"
"chenle"
"I told them not to worry because you think it's hot when I'm kinda mean"
"chenle"
they didn't believe me at first... and I was feeling pressured!...they literally cornered me!"
"chenle"
"so I showed them a little bit of our texts when you said...itwassexy whenIwasmeantoyou"
"run"
"I WILL TELL THEM ABOUT THE MOMMY KINK IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER?"
"run. now"
"ok!"
Jisung
"hey guys, just wanted to let you know me and jisung are dating now officially"
*shriek* "WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT!"
"Jisung what..."
"I DONT EVEN KNOW WHO YOU ARE"
"jisung park"
"please ma'am stop spreading that!"
"ANDY"
"I'm so sorry guys I dont know whats gotten into her!"
"jisung...She's literally your lockscreen"
"I literally have no idea what you are talking about"
"jisung I WILL do a coochie ban"
"this is actually bae 4 lyfe, she my day one and I worship the ground she walk on fr"
"thats what I thought"
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Hi! here is a little something from the drafts that is basically finished, I hope you like it! I am fr just getting back into writing so excuse any errors. But i hope yall have a good night/day!
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k0droid · 2 months
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would they say the n-word / are they racist: twisted wonderland edition
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Inspired by twstowo's taxes headcanon post.
I meant to post this during february but i just didnt.
REMEMBER THAT IS ALL FOR SHITS N GIGGLES. IF YOU THINK YOUR POOKIE IS/IS NOT A RACIST, REBLOG OR LEAVE A COMMENT
4/2 edit: JESUS CHRIST DON'T TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY 😭😭 THESE AREN'T REAL HCS, JUST SOMETHING STUPID FOR BLACK TWST FANS TO ENJOY
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GRIM: Yess that's my baby boy my son my son yes I give him the pass
RIDDLE: Couldn't waterboard the n-word outta him. Uses 'Off With Your Head' to punish anyone who uses slurs
TREY: Wouldn't. Not a racist and has no interest in saying the word.
CATER: Researches what's offensive to certain groups so he can stay respectful, no n-word from him
ACE: ace is literally that one white friend who thinks his n-word 'jokes' are funny (they're not) and he walks around with Riddle's collar because of that. He def went to a middle school named after a Confederate, but he's not racist for the most part "I play basketball so-" or "I'm gonna say the n-word: ninja!!" - 🥸
DEUCE: No. He's a good guy. He would never and if he said something remotely offensive, he'd apologize with tears
LEONA: YESS BLACK KING 🗣🔥🔥‼‼‼‼
JACK: Could and he does, but only occasionally. Punches the shit outta Ace's shoulder if he says something distasteful
RUGGIE: YES he just light-skinnted 😕 Ace would make fun of him for eating all the stereotypical foods
AZUL: Slightly racist. Just slightly. Seems like the type to get a lil tense when a tanned, well-built dude walks into the Monstro Lounge. starts clutching his pearls n shit
JADE: No, I don't really see him being racist or saying the n-word
FLOYD: Probably the least likely to say the n-word and would get offended that you even assumed. Like his entire mood would change if you mention it "Ehh Shrimpy? You tryna get squeezed? What made you think I would say that??" *fucking kills you*
KALIM: No, no n-word from Al-Asim. I could see him as a racist though. i think of kalim as purposely ignorant so in my mind, he's INTENTIONAL with his microaggressions but no one really calls him out on it.
JAMIL: Yes but only cuz I give him the pass.
VIL: Doesn't say the n-word (he knows better) but probably screams it in his thoughts. idk guys vil just seems a bit racist.
ROOK: Who's in Paris. LOL but I don't think he'd say the n-word. Also probably one of the least racist here. But he'd bring up eugenics in a convo and ruin the mood completely.
EPEL: I genuinely don't know if he would or not. Like because he from some rural area (to my knowledge, i js started book 5), i feel like he wouldn't because he'd know better. but i also heard that epel is misogynistic and hating black people & hating women go hand in hand (misogynoir)
IDIA: No but it wouldn't be surprising. i can already imagine him in that cod lobby. probably gets his slurs from cater
ORTHO: No my sweet child would not say the n-word. would blast idia out of this world with a charged beam if he said anything offensive
MALLEUS: No.
LILIA: Probably has said it before and is the most educated when it comes to black culture in the diasomnia group other than sebek (my 4c king)
SEBEK: No, in fact i might give him the pass (#mixedking😍❤️)
SILVER: No but probably a little colorist. yk how some black men love to scream from the mountain tops that they love white women? well silver is that white woman. js saying
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this was fun to make. pls remember that its just a silly post, dont get mad because only hit dogs will holler.
"what abt the staff/yuus/extras-" send an ask :3
4/2 edit: its crazy cuz the only mad people are white🧍🏾‍♀️
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thefatedthoughtofyou · 11 months
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Saw this meme and iiiiii did a thing... a steddie thing... obviously
( Eddie has a small dick in this if you don't like it don't read it. We support small dick supremacy in this house thank you for your time. 😊 )
😅😅😅
I'm picturing them at a bar. I wanna say maybe Steve is the bar tender, and he's been seeing Eddie around. He comes in. Talks a little, he's kinda quiet. Like he's stuck in his head, like he comes there to think. He's always scribbling things on napkins. Steve thinks they might be song lyrics, the way Eddie hums and taps his fingers as he writes.
But Steve obviously sees him looking at him sometimes. It's a gay bar, it happens, but Eddie doesn't leer at him, or chat him up in that way. It's always just friendly conversation.
Steve kind of loves it. Loves being able to just chat and not worry about getting stalked out to his car by a creep. And then one day some drunk dude is hitting on Eddie HARD. Leaning into him and grabbing at his arm and just when Steve is about to say something the guy actually says the words,
"how big is that dick?" Like... in real life. Out loud. And grabs for Eddie's thigh, and Steve watches Eddie catch his wrist, easy, watches him shove the guys hand back at him, saying,
"small. Leave me alone." Without even looking at him. And Steve fucking barks a laugh because that was... fucking hilarious. But also... kinda hot. Like, he's known he likes Eddie for awhile but seeing someone come on to him had sealed the deal, jealousy crawling over his skin, but then seeing Eddie shut it down, in the funniest fucking way Steve had ever seen, had just slammed it into place.
The guy scowls, says something rude, and stalks off. But Eddie is looking at Steve cuz he's still chuckling. Doing that cough thing like he's trying to cover it up but the laugh is still extremely prominent through the coughing. And Eddie watches him with raised eyebrows cuz like... damn okay. Cute bar tender thinks he's funny. And Steve is like,
"Sorry man. That was just, fuckin hilarious. Not the guy grabbing you, obviously, just, how you delt with it. Like that was... the best thing I've seen in awhile. Just... just sayin." He shakes his head to stop himself rambling more, he needs more friends to hangout with besides Robin, she's rubbing off on him. So he just reaches into the cooler and grabs Eddie his usual beer, slides it over the bartop to him, tells him it's on the house.
"Thanks." Is all Eddie says, but he looks happy, small smile still on his face.
And when the bar's closing, and Eddie is still there, just idly talking to Steve all night. Steve takes a chance. Says some cheesey line about letting Eddie walk him home. And Eddie flushes red to his ears but nods, takes the last sip of his beer and helps Steve flip the chairs onto the tables so he can do a quick sweep. Steve's locking the door when he hears Eddie clear his throat awkwardly, like he wants to say something. Steve looks at him, waits.
"I uh... look I know you thought I was being funny... earlier." Eddie scratches his head, nods into the bar. Steve nods, lets him continue.
"But I uh- I was also being serious?" He grimaces, eyes on the ground.
"So if that's like... a deal breaker? That's- that's totally okay. I just uh... I dont know. Thought I should maybe warn you before- before anything...happens?" His eyes widen and he takes a step back.
"Not that anything was gonna happen! Like I wasn't expecting... THAT. I just... oh my god I don't know. People can be assholes about small dicks so I just wanted to be up-front about it in case you thought I was kidding when I told that guy that. Cuz I was being serious and I'm gonna stop talking. Jesus christ." He breathes the last part, shaking his head at himself, his face twisted in what looks like pain. Steve thinks he's fucking adorable.
He steps closer, puts his hands on Eddie's hips and pushes him gently against the brickwall of the bar. Rests his head against Eddie's as he laughs a little, Steve's fingers pressing into his hips tickling a bit.
"I don't care. Honestly I uh..." he pauses, pulls back to look at Eddie, his eyes are wide, his cheeks are a deep pink now.
"I was kinda hopin you weren't kidding." Steve tilts his head, smirks at Eddie, just a little. A light smirk. Not the full thing, doesn't wanna overwhelme him. Yet. Eddie sucks in air, blinks at him.
"Oh. Yeah?" He asks, his voice breathy, pitched higher than usual. Steve nods, sinks his teeth into his lip, and brushes his nose against Eddie's.
"Yeah. Still wanna walk me home?" Steve asks, staying close. Eddie nods, his hands moving to Steve's shoulders.
"Yeah. Yes absolutely. I'd love that. I'd love too." He rambles, swallowing hard.
And Steve can't help himself anymore, ducks forward and presses a soft kiss to his lips. Eddie makes a little sound in his throat and Steve fucking adores it. Already in so deep for this guy. But it's been months. Eddie's not a new thing in his life. Just, this part of it is new.
Eddie blinks at him when he pulls back, steps away from Eddie but holds out his hand. Eddie smiles, reaches out and takes it, lets Steve drag him away from the wall and down the sidewalk. Their fingers laced together, hands swaying between them as they walk through the dark.
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stinkfacestories · 4 months
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The day you found out you had won Jason Kelces Beard Challenge was the best day of your life. The challenge was simple: put together a snap or tiktok video of how to get a beard as good as Jason and the top winner would win a day with Jason. Your video was a long shot: you made a tiktok showing how if you mixed essence of dwarf, with a bit of neanderthal, and just a splash of viking inside Abraham Lincoln's hat and applied it to your face, you'd look as good as Jason. It did t get very many views but Jason loved it. The next thing you knew you were in Philadelphia meeting the man himself at the airport.
The tour of Philadelphia through Jason Kelces eyes was a lot of stops at places he loved to eat. Steak sandwich, sausage, pizza, ice cream. The man just loved to eat. As the day dragged on just as Afternoon turned to evening he took you to Lincoln Field, his home turf. There was no game and the place was locked down, but that was nothing a few signed balls couldn't handle.
He took you to the locker room, the place where he told you he feels most free to be himself. You both sat down on the bench in front of his locker. He took out a case of bud light and cracked one open. The man drank so much bud lite you swore he was sponsored by them.
He told you to be quiet. To just listen to the sound of the room. To drink it in and become one with the soul of real American football.
The only thing you heard was the bench breaking as Kelce leaned forward and let out a fart with a satisfied grunt.
"Oh, sorry," he said, not sounding very sorry.
"Really? " you said. You looked at him, almost appalled that he would do that with you right next to him.
Jason turned and gave you a wink. "Dont tell me you don't find farts funny. Your a guy. All guys love farts." 
You rolled your eyes. "Not really."
"What about this one," he said and let loose a loud bassy fart.
"God stop it, it's so gross," you said as you slid away, but suddenly found yourself pressed against the wall of the locker room. "Seriously dude. What the fuck?"
"C'mon," Jason said as he moved over towards you. “I warned you. Remember when I ate that large sausage with pickled garlic ave said ‘were in trouble later’? What do you think I meant.” and placed a hand on your chest, giving you a bit of a push. "Don't be a prude."
You were caught between a wall, and a wall of beef holding you in place. "Seriously, stop it".
"Can't stop. Won't stop," he said still pressing you in the wall. His eyes were the kind of dull that only cheap low quality beer can make the."You know I bet you never had an older brother. Between me, my dad and Travis we learned to appreciate farts. My dad told me that the best cure is exposure. So to get you up to speed I think I need to gas you more"
He  pressed into you and lifted up his keg and let loose with a fart so powerful it echied through the empty locker room.. You struggled to get away from the horrible stench, but couldn't escape.
"No, don't do this," you said as it overwhelmed you.
He turned around and pressed his huge soft center lineman ass in your face, the soft fabric of his shorts spreading across your face like warm dough. It was too much, and you were powerless to stop it. His asshole flexed and relaxed as it sent out a long drawn out series of wet sounding farts. You gagged as the air around you filled with the horrid odor.
"Fuck that was a good one," he said, not budging an inch. “Three point stance just rips these farts out of me.”
"I think I'm going to puke," you said, trying not to vomit.
"If your gonna puke, aim that way, I like these shorts." he said pointing. "Do you think it's funny yet?"
"No!" You coughed.
"Alright you asked for it" he presses his ass harder, wedging your nose on his cheeks. He let loose with a rapid fire volley of farts that left you breathless and coughing. He backed away, chuckling at you.
"God, fuck, that's rank!" You coughed. You tried to breathe fresh air but the locker room had been total polluted by Kelces ass.
"Come on. You don't have to love them, but you gotta at least admit they are funny and manly now. How can you like football and not think farts are funny." he let you stew and come up with an answer.
"Fuck...no," you say.
He shrugged. "Ok. Your loss," he said and pressed his ass in your face again.
"No! Please. God. No. Fuck!"
"What's it going to take? Do I need to pull my shorts down and give you a bare ass stinkface?" He said, pressing even harder.
"No! No more. Fine. They're fucking funny," you cried.
"What?" He said. "I couldn't hear you"
"They're funny!"
"Now are you just saying that to make me stop?"
"No, I mean it. They are funny and they are manly."
"Well, if it's funny you won't have a problem asking me to do it a few more times so you can properly laugh. Right?"
"Uh...fine. Sure. Just, please, no more, I can't take it."
He turned and farted once. "Laugh. Laugh hard and long and deep." He was getting frustrated that you weren't laughing. "Seriously come on guy. This is just as bad for me as it is for you. It's hard to hold this position and if I keep farting I'm going to have to take a dump soon"
"Oh god no!"
"Laugh dammit!" He yelled.
"No, no, I can't."
"Fine then," he said. He pulled you down and set you face up on the bench. He loomed over you. "Ok big fucking guns time" he pulled down his shorts and hovered his raw hairy bear ass over your face.
"Oh shit, dude please don't!" His as was a beast. This close you could make out the rough skin. His ass had taken a pounding over the years and looked like a hefty bag overfilled with cottage cheese. The hair on his crack was dense and black. 
"Do you think this is funny?"
"Yes, yes, fuck, yes!" You were sobbing, your body convulsing.
“Good. Then you'll find this hilarious.” he sat down. He sat down hard. He rocked back and forth, the wiry hair of his ass crack scouring your face. He dug deep like he has an itch he was trying to scratch.
"Laugh. C'mon. Laugh, laugh like a big boy." He said, simultaneously belching and farting.
"Ahahaha!" You started crying and laughing.
"Oh fuck. What a fucking cry baby. Laughing at farts is supposed to be funny. Not sad."
"I'm sorry," you sobbed.
"Just...fucking stop," he said, standing and pulling up his shorts as he got off you. "Baby can't handle a grown man's ass. Jesus fuck"
He sat down next to you. You were still shaking a little, tears coming from your eyes. "I'm sorry," you said.
"It's fine, it's not the first time I've gassed someone like that," he said. "your not the only one who cried either "
You sniffed, still wiping tears away. "It was just so...overwhelming. The smell, and the sound, and the pressure..."
"It was a lot. It was," he said.
He drained his bud light and crushed the can. "Ok second chance to get it right." He leaves forward and farted, then looked to you to see your reaction.
You laughed. A genuine laugh. "Fuck, dude."
He smiled and farted again. You kept laughing. "It's funny, isn't it?"
"Yeah. It is," you said, laughing some more.
"Now you" he said 
You panicked. You didn't have to fart. You were to nervous.
"What the hell. Do it"
"I don't know if I can," you said.
"Come on. Do it. Do it" he chanted.
"I can't."
"You trying to make me mad? You're a guy. You should always be ready to let rip"
"But I'm not drunk like you are. And I'm not a fucking monster with an ass like yours."
"Fine, then, let's fix that." He reached down and ripped a huge one. He reached for his phone and placed a call "Trav. Yeah we got an emergency. Yeah get that chili defrosted and get some real cheap beer. Ooooh and some gas station food. Yeah he's a wimp. Didn't laugh. No he did. Fuck no she can't come to.  Alright. Love you. No homo" he hung up the phone.
"Your brother's coming over?"
"Yup. And he's gonna be pissed if you don't laugh when he cuts one. He loves farts. And he's got an ass that could kill a guy."
"Wait..."
"We're going to our man cave. It's a cabin in the woods. Just guys. Strict no pants policy. You better hope Trav remembered his boxers. You are gonna learn to love being a man like us and become the third Kelce brother, or you ain't leaving that shack."
"What's it going to be like," you said, afraid, but also excited.
"Oh, you're gonna hate every minute, and you're gonna love every minute."
"Fuck. I'm going to get wrecked, aren't I?"
"Oh definitely. We will probably fuck up your head so much. You're going to end up with a fetish for this."
You laughed.
All you could do was laugh.
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zbase1 · 10 months
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zb1's reaction to someone catching them kissing their s/o
genre: fluff
warnings: smooching
author's note: i hope you like it anon! this was a good prompt idea 🙏🏻
jiwoong
— nonchalant and has virtually no reaction
— maybe because he's used to kissing other people in front of cameras with a whole crew team watching too
— he's just a bit annoyed at the person who interrupted you guys
— just wants to get back to kissing you
— "can i help you or something" 😐
zhang hao
— literally flinches and yelps
— he gets startled so easily lmao
— moves away from you so fast you didn't even process someone had walked in on you guys 🏃🏻‍♂️💨
— in denial from the beginning to the end
— "what are you talking about? i definitely wasn't kissing y/n!" 🙅🏻‍♂️
hanbin
— we all know how whenever hanbin is embarrassed, his ears turn red (he's so cute for that omfg)
— so when someone comes walking in on the two of you kissing, the tips of hanbin's ears would get all red and he would be SO flustered
— mentally prepares himself to suffer endless teasing from the other boys
— uses his leader authority to jokingly threaten the person who walked in 😀
— "you didn't see anything. if i hear you bring this up, you're sleeping outside for the night."
matthew
— gets all giggly and blushy 🤭
— "oh no, you caught us!!"
— as soon as the person leaves, matthew goes back to whatever he was doing before
— doesn't let it bother him too much
— because at the end of the day, matthew knows that he's the only one that gets to kiss you 😎
— he finds this whole situation hilarious and laughs about it
taerae
— sooooo shy and flustered he almost passes out 😳
— buries his face in your shoulder because he doesn't want you to see him blushing like crazy
— feels guilty for some reason??? acts like he committed some crime when he didn't 💀
— "i'm sorry......" (like dumbass what are you apologizing for 🤔)
— protect this boy at all costs
— taerae couldn't physically look you in the eyes for a few hours after that awkward incident
ricky
— feels mostly embarrassed, but honestly, also a bit irritated at the sudden intrusion
— tries to play it off cool to preserve his chic image, but is freaking out on the inside 🫣
— suddenly, the rings on his fingers become really really interesting
— distracts himself from the situation by fiddling with the rings
— you can't help but tease him for how cute he was being 😩
— "awww, are you feeling shy ricky?"
— "no most definitely not" (it was a lie)
gyuvin
— he panics and shoves you away, then starts laughing really loudly 💀
— "HAHAHAHA THIS IS SO FUNNY?? I CANT BELIEVE THAT JUST HAPPENED AHAHAHA"
— tries to pretend it didn't happen, but of course the others are going to bring it up, especially ricky
— "hey dude remember that one time-"
— "NO RICKY I DONT REMEMBER"
— blud think he's safe from teasing ⁉️
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Sword gays showdown, round 2 of bracket one
Propaganda:
For Zoro:
Literally training to be the greatest swordsman in the world. Has a special three swords technique (one blade in each hand plus one with the handle held in his teeth). I haven't read the manga or watched the anime but the live action adaptation gives me extremely gay vibes and based on the fandom things I've seen I'm not the only one
bro uses three swords. has one in his mouth. dont ask how the HELL he manages that. one day he will be the worlds greatest swordsman....after he beats the current greatest for both the titles of greatest swordsman and fruitiest swordsman. he's dramatic as FUUUCK like bro what the hell. has homoerotic fights with the local twink like everyday. directionally challenged, can and will get lost in a paper bag, doesnt know left from right...he probably cant read, too. hes too silly ngl
First of all, im in like episode 250 and so far he hasnt been shown attracted to any woman at all during the whole show so far, not even when one changed clothes in the same room as him and this is anime so you know there were other characters with bloody noses and shit. With that out of the way he wields three swords at once [two in his hands, one is his goddamn mouth dude. Its cool af trust me.] When he was little he made a promise to his best friend that he'd be the best swordsman in the world. Later she died in a tragic accident and left her sword which he still uses today. He also carries a cursed sword but he overpowers the curse with a combination of skill and sheer luck. He got stuck in a chimney. While his crewmates sail their ship he takes naps. He learned how to cut through metal by fighting a guy who could turn his body into metal blades. That's metal. He refuses to fight this liberal marine officer because she looks like his childhood best friend and its just understandably really awkward for him. He's autistic. He's a he/him bisexual lesbian. He's a gay man. He's ace/aro. He's whatever you want him to be babey!!
he has 3 swords, wields one in his mouth sometimes, his dream is to be the greatest swordsman in the world
three swords and big aroace-spec gay vibes
He not only has a sword he has *three* swords. He's absolutely gay there's no way to see this man as straight. Also one time he licked his sword for no reason and that was really funny to me so I had to mention it
Look, this man thinks about three things: Swords, His Captain, and Booze. He’s on a quest to be the worlds greatest swordsman. The Live action has a scene where he declares his undying, unwavering loyalty to his captain WHILE reaffirming his promise to be the worlds greatest swordsman. At this point His dream and his Captain are so intertwined it’s crazy. Man is so sword-y he’s got three of them. When one of his swords broke he carried its empty scabbard until he was able to give it a SWORD FUNERAL. He hears a sword is cursed and takes that as a challenge. He will literally tell his swords off for “bad behavior” when they “act up” due to being straight up cursed. He tests one by throwing it in the air and sticking his arm out to see if it is so blood thirsty and ill tempered that it will cut him. Even though he’s literally the first mate if you ask him what his role is he’s going to answer Swordsman.
He's dedicated his life to two things: becoming the greatest swordsman in the world and his captain, Luffy. 
He mastered the three sword style. Its his style. It would've been more swords but he could only fit one sword in each hand and one in his mouth. He wants to be the world's greatest swordsman, a deal he made with his childhood best frenemy (before she died falling down the stairs). He thought he was All That at the start and was almost completely decimated by the actual Worlds Greatest Swordsman. Now, after two years forced training with that guy, he's probably in the top tier no-doubt, and honestly could already be the best but we just don't know for sure yet. Also, did I mention: he's got the whole demon/devil imagery going on at times. And he has absolutely no sense of direction! plus is a total softie when it comes to Chopper and all the children who somehow gravitate towards him. And he loves naps!
One of the guy's main goals in life is to be the best sword fighter and he fights with three swords which I think is telling enough of his skill.
For Sayaka Miki:
my favourite scene is the one where Sayaka turns off all her pain receptors to battle the shadow witch, uncaring of the damage dealt to her body, because what is a body but a decaying vessel you must eventually abandon anyway? that was very depression of her <3 Also there’s that one time (in the rebellion movie) where Sayaka stabs herself on her own sword to release the witch that dwells within her. and then she immediately gets up to fight back to back with her girlfriend. that moment lives rent free in my head. Sayaka is so depression and I love her for it:)
SHES SO GAY ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY SHE FLIRTS W THE MAIN CHARACTER HER NARRATIVE FOIL IS ANOTHER GIRL W TBE OPPOSITE COLOR SCHEME THEYRE RED BLUE LESBIAN MOMENT YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT ELSE ??? SHE COMES TO THIS FALSE REALITY LITERALLY JUST TO SEE HER GIRLFRIEND ALIVE THEY LIVE TOGETHER AND THERES A WHOLE OUTRO SEQUENCE JUST W THE TWO OF THEM SHE STUDIED THE GAY BLADE I STG also she uses a sword 🗡️ love u sayaka
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Clanblr dashboard simulator is back babye (part 1)
#yes i just finished part 1 #yes im already doing another one #this is really fun to me #hey btw when the follow button is "missing" it isnt missing. #that's your mutuals
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🪺 robbbinpaw Follow
I miss leaf-bareeeeee... my long-haired ass CANNOT with this weather
#shorthairs please dont reblog with "actually i think the warm weather is nice" #then this post isn't for you #robbbinposts
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🔁 🐍xviper-the-fagx reblogged
🐍 xviper-the-fagx
I'm trnasgender
🐍 xviper-the-fagx
Happy 6 moon anniversary to the time I butchered what was supposed to be my cool, unexpected coming-out with a spelling error
🔥 b-b-b-blaaazr Follow
At least the typo wasnt in your url dude
Also. The coming out wasnt unexpected. At all. We all knew.
#fuck you blaze #"we all knew" yeah maybe because i posted about how i wished i was a tom 10 times a day #whacking uou on the head with my manly paws
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🔁 🦁 lionsight-x3 Follow reblogged
🌻 l1llyst3m Follow
Happy bday to @lionsight-x3, my beloved mutual! Cant imagine life without you
🦁 lionsight-x3 Follow
AGHJHHHH THANK YOUUU ILY SO MUCH LILY <3
#Was honestly having a TERRIBLE birthday until I saw this. #Love you so much Lilystem.
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🦋 lalala-bluegaze Follow
Am I the only one who didnt know that @ex-thunderclan-kipper is a kittypet??
🛤 carnation-stem-02 Follow
His whole blog, including his url, is based around the fact that he's ex-clan... how are you just now finding this out...
🦋 lalala-bluegaze Follow
I just followed for the wood-scratching art..
#didnt realize he was a kittypet #:/
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🦢 gentlesong-momof17 Follow
Kits are having their apprentice ceremony tomorrow... can't believe they're all grown up. At least my next litter is due in a moon!!
#momlife #queen #leaving the nursery #mom life #nursery queen #perm queen #perm queen life #permanent queen #permanent queen life
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🔁 🪺 robbbinpaw Follow reblogged
🫎 mo0sedude Follow
Im actually gonna die
🫎 mo0sedude Follow
Sorry guys forgot to specify. My assessment is tomorrow. So like. My mentor is gonna decide if I get to become a warrior or not. Im freaking out
🪺 robbbinpaw Follow
Wait. Youre an apprentice still??
🫎 mo0sedude Follow
Ya? My bio says 11 moons- how old did you think I was?
🪺 robbbinpaw Follow
WHAT????
I thought you were 21 moons old! Last time I read your bio was 2 days ago and I swear I thought it said 21!??
#moose ive been thinking you were 21 this whole time #cant believe youre only a moon older than me #this is surreal #robbblogs
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🌠 nightshade-tast3s-yummy Follow
Im on transblr and I keep mixing @l1llyst3m up with @carnation-stem-02... they look nothing alike and post about completely different things I think it's just the (flower)stem names
🛤 carnation-stem-02 Follow
This is extra funny to me considering Lily and I actually became mutuals due to a similar mix-up (someone tagged her where they meant to tag me) but I for the life of me cannot understand how nobody takes one look at our blogs and never makes that mistake again.
🛤 carnation-stem-02 Follow
To the cats in the notes saying "but you're both trans, it's confusing" guys. We arent even the same flavor of gender...
#shes transfemme #im agender #why is this even a source of confusion #we dont even go by the same pronouns..
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🌱 dirtdigger-23 Follow
Uh... hello?? I think Im on the wrong site... what in the name of StarClan is... Tumblr...
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soothinglee · 4 months
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now it’s different; i am the one inlove...
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jeongin x reader | 3.3k✔︎ | mainly his point of view.
my notes⎯ whew. this is the longest fic i've ever posted and i can't lie and say it wasn't a pain. originally i got this idea from listening to "morning dew" like 100 times and thought it would be perfect to write something for i.n.
warnings⎯ somewhat angsty, poor writing, some cursing, doubts, and humorous dialogue (so sorry if you dont find me funny).
genre⎯ eventual friends to lover, angst.
songs⎯ morning dew; xavier wulf | a new kind of love; frou frou
⎯catalog for skz✰ | requests r open
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12.03.23 | 4:04 p.m;
it had been ten minutes since you left jeongins’ side to aid seungmin in teasing changbin. the frigid weather turning your breaths to smoky clouds as you laugh at one another.
jeongin rests in his spot on the park bench, if you ask, he’ll simply say he cannot join in on the fun due to the stiffness in his joints, and not the fact that an unwavering feeling of jealousy is creeping through his bones like wildfire.
he can’t help but narrow his eyes at the skinship you give felix, reaching up to brush the snowflakes out of his bangs, threading your fingers in his when you spot a squirrel resting in a tree; dragging him towards the spot before the rodent runs off.
jeongin hates physical touch with a burning passion. there would never not be a time where he didn’t push one of his hyungs off of him. he didn’t like when bangchan would suprise back hug him, or when hyunjin would randomly sit in his lap and pester him.
yet when he looks at the way you interact with the other members, he cant help but wonder what it would feel like with his hands in yours. running around the white colored park, throwing snow at eachothers faces, trying not to slip on the ice while playing tag with everyone else.
you weren't shy to affection, jeongin knew that for a fact. so there wasn't any real reason for him to be scared to go up to you and initiate a hug or a hand hold. but the overwhelming feeling he's been trying to hide for the last two years is holding him back.
yang jeongin has the biggest crush on you. he just wont admit it.
all the other members can see it clear as day, they don't hesitate to tease him about it when you aren't around; sometimes they do it infront of you but they are somewhat discreet about it.
"you're staring again." a muffle voice comments beside him. jeongin flinches at the sudden sound, he had been sitting by himself silently for a little longer than he had expected. "keep it up and she'll think you're a creep."
jeongin raises up his fist towards hyunjins face to which the man backs away quickly, "shut it." he threatens, he turns his attention back towards you, watching you get a piggyback ride through the snow by bangchan. he holds back a scoff.
hyunjin shrugs, readjusting his scarf around his face. the tip of his nose peeks through the fabric, it's color matches his ears; dusted a cherry red, "i'm not lying. even just watching you watch her is making me uncomfortable," he shivers to further his point, jeongin lightly shoves him. "i don't know why you wont just tell her."
jeongin feels his blood run cold contrast to the heat in his cheeks. he gives a quick glance towards hyunjin who watches him expectantly. "i don't know what you're talking about." he mumbles, adjusting his body on the wooden bench. he's been sitting for so long that his butt is growing numb.
"i.n-ah!"
"what?" he says, "i don't have any feelings for her, i'm only just looking. it's not illegal or did the laws suddenly change?"
jeongin swivels his head exasperatedly to look at hyunjin only to find him staring back with a wide grin. jeongin raises an eyebrow.
after a moment of staring, hyunjin lightly murmurs, "i never said anything about having a crush on her." his grin widens.
in that moment panic flushes through jeongins body and he's quick to clamp a hand over hyunjins mouth. "shut up. shut up dude."
"YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON Y/N." hyunjins voice comes out muffled underneath jeongins glove but he can still hear it very clearly. he just hopes no one else (more specifically you) hears it aswell.
"you liar, i do not! hyung, please stop screaming, i swear-!"
"you guys alright?" a third voice pipes up. both of them turn and see you standing a couple inches away, bare hands shoved in pockets looking like a swaddled marshmallow. you were covered head to toe in snow, proof of the snowball fight you had with felix lingered on your clothing. the apples of your cheeks moved with every sniff you took and jeongin couldn't help but mentally compare you to a bunny.
he immediately released hyunjin, who stayed in his backed up postion grinning at him. "yeah." he cringes at the way his voice cracked out of nerves, or the way his palms started to sweat despite the cold.
"are you sure?" you question, looking at hyunjin then back at him, "i thought i heard a scream."
"no-"
"-you did." hyunjin interjects, slapping a hand on jeongins back. his body jostles forward at the contact. "but it was nothing, right i.n? just some light teasing."
jeongin grunts through his teeth, "yeah. harmless."
you nod, unsure that it's the whole truth, "okay..." you point behind you, gesturing over towards the disfigured snow man whose bottom half lay smaller than its top, it's eyes on opposite sides of its face. "well if you're sure...i'll just go back."
before you can fully turn around, two heavy hands place itself on your shoulders to halt your movements, "no, you should stay and take a break. you've been moving around a lot. i'll finish your snowman with changbin."
you look at hyunjin, eyebrows scrunched together, "are you sure? you don't need to do that, we're almost finished anyway-."
hyunjin looks towards the figure and back towards you, "-no the hell you aren't. don't worry," he reassures, taking a deep breath. you can almost see the captains hat form on his head. "leave it to the artist."
he gives you a light push towards the empty spot next to jeongin, his butt print out lined in the snow on the seat. he turns around and calls out to changbin, "yah! it looks like shit! let me take over!"
"eh? you don't know jack about making a snowman!"
"i know more than you do, genius!" his voice fades away as his stumbles down the hill and towards a grumpy changbin.
you can't help but let out a giggle at the twos bickering. "something is wrong with them."
jeongin tries to nod in agreement but finds himself frozen.
at the lack of a response you turn towards him and see him tense in his spot, "are you okay?" concern drips from your voice as you lean towards him.
he hums quietly, giving you a brief glance and then returning his attention to hyunjin kicking over the snowman. "'m good."
you only nod and face forward.
a couple minutes go by as nothing else is exchanged. your hands begin to freeze due to the lack of heat to your fingers. you pull them out to send a few frosty puffs of air to at least try to heat them up but it doesn't work; you can practically see the icicles grow from your nails.
"it's so cold." you comment, rubbing your hands together.
jeongin perks up at your voice instantly, looking over at the way your shoulders shiver and the weak attempt at warming yourself up. before he even realizes it, he's pulling off his own mittens. "where are your gloves?" he questions, no hints of mockery in his croaky voice.
"gave them to han." you comment, smiling softly, "lee know took his when they were fighting and he wouldn't stop whining about how he was going to have to get his fingers amputated, so i gave him mines."
jeongin can't help the smile making its way to his face at your selflessness. you were always like that, worrying about others before yourself. it was admirable but he wishes you didn't do it as much.
"what about your hands?" he questions, holding out his own pair to you. you kindly reject his offer, pushing away his hands as he tries to force them onto yours.
"what about them?" you retort, "i was keeping them busy, with all the movement it gave me enough warmth."
he can't help but roll his eyes. he gives one last attempt at taking your hands and lets out a little cheer when you relent and give them up. jeongin feels his eyes widen as he looks at the purple color nipping at your fingers, sure you'll get frostbite later. he quickly slides on the wool gloves (much faster than he would've liked- it would've been nice to hold your hands a little longer) and watches satisfied when you lean back on the bench with a relaxed sigh.
with your eyes closed, basking in the new warmth, the feeling of the snowflakes hit the bridge of your nose tickles as you try to brush them off. you can't help the childish giggles that escape you as you scrunch your nose in retaliation.
and jeongin can't help but watch.
all he wanted to do was deny, deny, deny his feelings for you.
he didn't want to complicate the relationship you had built up since you joined the group. he was the first person you talked to, he saw how anxious you were and did everything he could to make you feel comfortable, despite the fact that he was relatively new too and couldn't do much.
sure you were close with all the other members, but you and jeongin had a connection. something deep down that made your tummy hum and your head feel cloudy. every time he was near you he felt- cheesy enough- complete.
jeongin doesn't like you like that.
he couldn't.
"just friends." he thinks, watching as you turn to him with a smile that makes his heart hurt. "just friends."
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12.05.23 | 8:23 p.m;
it had been a couple days since you all went to the park and you can already feel the sickness creeping up your throat.
most of the tea in the house was gone due to the other 8 contracting colds left and right. so when you go into the cabinet to make you another fix it wasn’t surprise to see that the options were limited.
what was surprising was that your chamomile tea, which you bought for yourself only (and jeongin) was sat empty on the shelf.
“son of a-.” you start, turning back towards the rooms lined the hallway, “which one of you bitches drank my tea?”
“me, sorry,” a voice echoes down the hall, “i ran out of mine and yours was the only one that looked good.”
jisung.
“i lend you my gloves and this is how you repay me?” you shout back, opting for some black tea instead, turning on the stove. “just for that you have to do my chores for the next week!”
it’s silent for a concerning second, and then a loud, throaty cough, “girl, fuck you!”
before you could spit out a long winded response, full of curse words you didn’t even know could be strung together, a gentle hand was placed on your back.
“you need to relax, you’ll raise your blood pressure, grandma.”
you turn around and see jeongin standing there with a mask around his face. he’s clad in a matching tracksuit, it was a size too big so it hung off his shoulders, allowing you to see the tank strap he had on underneath.
good lord.
“i’m legit only a couple months older than you.” you retort, pointing a wooden spoon at his face, “not too much on me.”
he laughs and raises his hands in defense, “i apologize.” he does you a favor and starts to put water in the kettle, “if it’s really that serious, i could just go out and get more for you. you don’t have to kill han over it.”
you watch as he places the kettle on the stove and ignites the burner, “i would be doing lee know a favor.”
he laughs again and allows you to take over. “plus you’re sick too.” you add, watching steam slowly blow out of the hole, “i don’t want you to go out and take care of me when you’re in the same state. that ain’t right.”
jeongin says nothing for a moment, trying to find the right words to say. he doesn’t want to lay out all his cards on the table, his confession riddle with coughs and pit stops to wipe his nose. but he wants to say that he doesn’t care that’s he’s sick. that he’ll go back to a few days ago and give you the coat off his back if you asked.
to be honest, just like the gloves, you wouldn’t have to.
he’ll willingly give you anything. even the world if you truly wanted it.
ugh, cheesy.
he pulls out his phone and leans against the counter next to you, "if you wont let me get it, i'll just doordash it."
you perk up, "you can doordash tea?"
jeongin nods and grins, facing the app towards you were the jewel-osco section is pulled up, "uh-yeah? you didn't know that?"
you scoff, "no? i'm not a online food delivery freak like the rest of you."
"you say that until you're asking me to order you some take out at like one in the morning."
you roll your eyes and push him out the way jokingly. the kettle begin to whistle like felix trying to hit a high note and you pour the hot water into the mug. "watch it." you pull down another cup from the cabinet, "and please don't spend your money on me. save it for something better."
jeongin raises an eyebrow, "like what? more clothes?" he jokes, clicking place order. "it's fine. i like buying things for you. even if its something small." small was definitely not the right word after he just spent 10 dollars on a tiny box of packets.
you can't help the heat that rises to your cheeks and turn your back to him, finding sudden interest in the tea in front of you. "i'll pay you back later."
"no need." he says, voice coming out softer than he intended, "like i said, i like buying stuff for you." he watches as your hands pause putting the sachets in the mugs and takes over, "i got it."
you have to force the thank you out of your throat as you stare up at him. maybe its because you're sick, but the lightheaded feeling becomes intense and you have to grip the sides of the counter to stabilize yourself. you watch as his hands move with ease, adding the sugar, then the honey to each respective mug.
he says nothing more, but he doesn't need to really say anything. the intense look on his face voices his thoughts a lot more than he wanted to let on, just like a few days ago. something was on his mind, he just wasn't saying what.
"are you okay?" you ask gently, laying a hesitant hand on his mid-back. you can feel him tense underneath your touch for a spilt second and then his body relaxes. he looks towards you quickly, giving a stiff smile. he pushes the finished tea towards you, your hands incase the hot cup before the liquid can spill over.
"mhm." his fingers dance over the rim of his drink, "why wouldn't i be?"
"i dunno." you reply, "you just look...overwhelmed."
"well, i am sick." he smirks, pulling down his mask to his chin, "everything is a little overwhelmed right now."
you shove him lightly, careful of the cup in his hands, "you know that's not what i mean!" he laughs, "but...you do know you can talk to me right? like, you know i wont judge, right?"
he knows that, in a million years, that you were never critical to his feelings. for as long as he could remember the two of you were going to each other for problems that you couldn't solve alone. but this was a different feeling. and if he were to tell you, he could be ruining a relationship that took a long time to build up. why ruin that rapport for something like a silly crush?
but he couldn't help but wonder if you felt the same? there had been many times where some of the other boys said that you felt the same, even though it wasn't there business to get involved (they do not care). but jeongin knew how they could be. spreading misinterpreted lies to egg on something that most likely isn't true in the first place. they had a tendency to mix up words so why would now be any different?
he's spent all of this time convincing himself that what he felt for you wasn't crush like behaviors. just a good friend looking out for another.
but friends dont get jealous when the other holds another's hand. friends dont get jealous when the other gives another more attention. friends dont have the urge to take them on dates, or have their contact be more than platonic, or to kiss the other.
maybe hyunjin has a point, maybe he does like you.
jeongin feels that if his heart continues on like this, it could stop at any moment. "death by seemingly unrequited love." would look hella embarrassing on his tombstone.
out of all the situation he has been alone with you, why did his heart and mind choose now to tell you? maybe it's the sickness making him vulnerable but he feels a rush of confidence surge through his veins.
"actually," he starts, a nervous shake rattles his vocal cords. he refuses to make eye contact with you, finding interest in his scorching hot cup, "there is something i need to tell you."
you posture immediately straightens and you place down your mug, giving him your undivided attention. usually he loves it, now its burdensome, "oh? what is it?"
the tea shakes under his hold and he mentally curses it for exposing his fear. he wants to do it so bad, it'll be okay, he tries to convince himself. just let it out.
"i've been trying to convince myself for a while that what i feel isn't true but i think i should tell you now."
you nod, urging him to go on.
he takes a deep breath, he isn't trying to stall but the way his insides buckle is making it hard to find the words.
he started it, now he just has to finish.
"y/n, I...," he pauses, "y/n I lik-" before he can get it out there's a big crash coming from down the hall. heavy footsteps stop at the kitchens entrance and lee know stands there covered in bubbles.
"what the hell happened?" you comment, rushing over to him while holding back a laugh. he looks like the pillsbury dough boy standing there eagle spread.
lee know coughs and you swear you see several suds fly from his mouth. "seungmin. i'll kill him, i swear i will."
you let out a laugh and brush the soap from his shoulders. it takes you a second to remember but when you do you turn back around to look at jeongin, "i'm so sorry what were you saying?" you start to say only to find the tea he was drinking abandoned on the counter.
"jeongin?"
jeongin barely hears you call out his name as he rushes down the hall and towards his room. he can't help the tears that brim in his eyes and he starts to feel pathetic wiping them away.
what the hell was he thinking? admitting he liked you was hard enough on himself, so why did he think admitting it to you was a good idea?
as he sits on his bed, he can't help but feel a piece of him gone. you most likely didn't know where he was getting at, you didn't know that he was confessing to you in that moment. but the embarrassment of him understanding his words were worse. there was no way he could face you after that. for his own dignity.
as he cries he can't help but think;
it's always different, i am the one in love.
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part 2?
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lazybutsmexy · 1 year
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I don't really have an idea in my mind rn. But i do want to request ( if you dont mind ) protective König or jealousy König either of them are interesting for me
And just wanted to say that all of ur works are amazing !! *chef kiss*
( ignore my grammar, I'm quite bad at english TT )
Hello love!! I'm so happy you liked my writings hehe and don't worry about your English, it's completely fine 🫶♥️
Jealous König drabble
•~•~•~•
Jealous König is a rarity. In fact, it's a "blink and you miss it" sort of reaction. That is because he doesn't show off how it bothers him when you laugh at other men's jokes or don't immediately shrug someone off when they lay a hand on your shoulder. Unless he notices that you're uncomfortable - which he never misses, by the way - he won't act on it.
In his mind, he has no control over who you think is funny or who you let touch your body. He trusts you, with his whole body, mind and heart, and respects your integrity as a person, a strong individual, a partner. It doesn't mean he can't feel jealous, but it slowly simmers in his body as he tries not to let it show.
He knows that jealousy comes from a place of insecurity, of seeing himself as not enough to fill your needs. Another source of insecurity is that nasty bug in the back of his head telling him how you would replace him at the drop of a hat for someone more capable of filling those needs.
Jealousy to König means insecurity, anger, greed. He always wants to be a better man for you, and that means getting ahold of his emotions and keep them down, lest he does something that - God forbids - hurts you.
He is quiet in general, as a default setting, especially in large gatherings. And his eyes always search for and find your figure no matter the situation. So you don't instantly notice that his blood is slowly boiling in the inside at the mere thought of another man shooting his shot with you. For the past ten minutes, König has been looking for any clue in your body language that indicated that this private was making you uncomfortable, just so he could stomp over to you and scare the shit out of him away.
You feel his stare, so you turn to him and smile sweetly before you notice that his eyes don't crinkle at the edges like he usually does as a response. The man next to you - you already forgot his name, that's how unimportant he is to you - continues talking about some of his accomplishments back in highschool, but you tune out his voice in order to study König a little more.
His posture is rigid, his arms crossed over his chest and his breathing slow. Even from across the bar where the party is happening, you can feel a threatening aura emanating from him, as if you're watching a hungry tiger ready to pounce.
Usually, your blood fills with endorphins when you notice König staring at you, as that tends to be an indicator that he wants you. But this is a different stare, and fills your blood with ice. König emanates anger.
After being so intimate with König for a few months, you have learned to pick apart the clues in his behaviour. And right now, you want to kick yourself in the face for not noticing sooner. The man next to you - who you considered no more than background noise at this point - could end up bedridden for who knows how long if you didn't do something quick.
You look again at him and interrupt him with a smile, making sure that König could read your lips from where he was: "nice to meet you, uh," you quickly glance at his tag, "private Lang, but I'm going to join my boyfriend now." The private just stared owlishly at you as you got up and left some bills on the counter, before turning and walking towards König of all people.
Konig himself felt a mixture of different emotions: pride that you called him your boyfriend, relief because you preferred him over that dude, annoyance that it took you so long to leave that guy behind, and utter giddiness over being called your boyfriend in such a public setting. (He would swallow the last one down and leave it for a talk later).
He also got up and opened the door for you, indicating that he was more than ready to finally have you all to himself, and you took a deep breath, mentally preparing yourself for the long night of atonement you had in front of you.
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pineappleciders · 1 year
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heyy first of all its me the fucked up dream anon (now going by dream anon how original) second of all ive decided im going to learn about south park purely through your work so can i get some tweek (ive latched onto that boy) and whoever else you want (probably the main boys) with a reader (all platonic ofc) who's got that #anxiety? thanks even if you dont do it <33
🌌🌟/dream anon
main 4 + tweek with a reader who has anxiety; platonic headcanons
A/N: haii :3 i apologize if this like, distorts your vision of the characters or something. i am so glad you are being converted to the religion of tweek!!!!!!
TRIGGER WARNING: anxiety disorders, light mental health topics, paranoia, panic/anxiety attacks, death mention on kennys part
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stan marsh
i think stan has a normal amount of anxiety. like he's so regular. he's your average joe
like he gets anxious over tests, and giving speeches, and over wendy. other than that he doesn't experience it to the extent of a disorder
so it might be a little difficult for him to imagine getting anxious over simple things like ordering food and stuff like that
he'll try his best to listen though, although he'll probably try to kinda reason with you, esp if you're feeling paranoid or something
"dude, i checked twice, it's locked. relax, man."
he'll try to distract you, by playing games and watching stuff, and just generally kinda trying to be funny to take your mind off of things
if you're having a panic/anxiety attack, he kinda panics too at first, before quickly pulling you away and asking what's wrong. he is sweating very hard
if you're unresponsive, he tries to stay calm but is honestly considering calling an ambulance. like he thinks you're having a stroke
"shit, a panic attack? uh, okay, errr.... take deep breaths, okay? in.. and out. in.. and out. okay, that's good.."
he looks up grounding techniques on his phone and relays them to you until you calm down and catch your breath. he like sends you images off of google of the 5 senses technique randomly and says he figured you'd need it someday
he tries to keep your anxiety in mind, and might slip up sometimes, but for the most part he tries to be careful with his words and actions as to not worry you. he shows his care in subtle ways!!
kyle broflovski
he tries to kinda. logic it out a bit. like if you're feeling insecure he tells you how unrealistic it is for someone to think about one random passerby's appearance forever
he does feel bad though. he doesn't completely understand, but whenever he's feeling insecure he tends to get really anxious about people at school
he usually gets anxious whenever he's doing something wrong or sneaking out. like he's actually sweating and shitting his pants thinking about what his mom will do to him if she finds out
he'll encourage you to order food for yourself, to get yourself out there more, and if you succeed he'll pat your shoulder and smile a lil
if you don't want to, he might dramatically sigh but he'll do it anyways. cuz he knows how hard it is
i do think he'd get a little anxious about asking workers for help and stuff, but he'll be the bigger person... he supposes... smh my head...
when you have an panic attack for the first time, he's like really confused and gets super concerned that you're having a heart attack, and pulls his phone out to dial your parents or 911
"i'm here for you dude! listen- hey, listen to me. it's okay. can- can you-"
he tries to talk to you to de-escalate it, but he gives up and has his hand on your back, while looking up what the fuck to do
'friend havign panjc atgack what to do'
if you're okay with it, he probably talks to your parents about it. he doesn't really trust himself to be able to always calm you down, so he encourages getting outside/professional help
he does try though, and he'll always be there for you in different ways!! like when you need help with something or just need company to distract you, he's at ur door with his xbox 360
eric cartman
you can tell that eric gets a little uncomfortable if you're freaking out or feeling anxious. whether it's because he actually feels bad or just doesn't know how to handle your emotions, you'll never know
but either way, he'll probably just like. sit next to you like "dude, what's up with you?" or in other cases he'll sneakily slip out of the room unseen
he does try to be kinda logical about it, but that's solely because he physically can't speak words of comfort.
"i mean, dude, be seriously. nobody cares about you that much to notice." you speak such kind words eric!!
he doesn't really like it when things get serious, so he'll generally try to transition the situation into something more casual. like he'll try to ease your (his) mood by getting snacks and playing games together, or even begging his mom to take you both to KFC
if you have a panic attack, all of his alarms are blaring and his brain is screaming flight!!!!! flight!!!! run the fuck away!!!!
and he probably tries to, but when you notice him and call his name he physically deflates
he awkwardly turns around and slowly strolls over. "Y/N... heeeeeeey... what's up... duuude..." you can hear the strain in his voice
if it gets to be too much, as in you won't stop hyperventilating or can't breathe, he'll probably alert an adult or take you to the nurse or something. he tells himself it's because he doesn't want to be a suspect of your death
if ur having trouble ordering food he'll gladly take ur place and make a scene to get all eyes on him. "erm excuthe me they athed for no pickleth🤓"
other than when you're voicing your anxiety, he probably treats you the same. i don't really think he'd take advantage of your anxiety unless you were like. butters or heidi or something and he was really trying to get you to do something for him or just trying to. stick himself in your mind. because he's a narcissist and he loves that!!
kenny mccormick
he doesn't relate necessarily, but he definitely understands.
he lives a lot of his life in fear of his next death, and is constantly praying it be quick and painless
kenny is more of a reserved fella, but not really shy or anxious. so if you're having trouble speaking up or ordering something he'll step up and do it gladly!!
i think he'd be pretty decent at comforting. like he'll pat his hand on your back and speak assuring, muffled words
"mm, mmph mmph mmmph! mmph mph mph mmmfmf mmf mph mph mmph!" (aww, it'll be okay. i'll walk you every step of the way, buddy!)
he tries to take your emotions into consideration more, and grabs your hand and squeezes it sometimes if you need a boost of confidence. sometimes he forgets your anxiety and says something rude and feels really bad about it
when you're having a panic attack, he's honestly really scared and expects you to start foaming at the mouth or something
he'll hesitate, but he'll pat your back and try to help you with grounding techniques. the 5-4-3-2-1 in particular is his favorite, and he'll tell you how to do it in like a rlly sweet and calming voice
he's still spooked though, and gets you a water bottle and like a washcloth. he's incredibly thankful you aren't dying or anything
kenny is very good at comforting! sometimes all it takes is a simple moment of eye contact and seeing his eyes crinkle that gives you a surge of calmness you didn't know you needed
tweek tweak
tweek is no outsider to anxiety and stress. he's literally a living beehive with all that damn vibrating
to anyone else, it would seem like tweek had a severe anxiety disorder, or even ADHD. but it turns out it's just a result of his crippling meth addiction and caffiene overdoses
he tries to think about what craigs taught him, about grounding techniques and how to handle a panic attack, and tries to apply those for you
he's shakily take your hand and wrap you in a blanket, making you hot cocoa and helping you slowly come back to your senses
"okay, okay, what are 5 things you can touch? or- no- AGH! was it 5 things you see- hear? no, ACK! i can't remember!"
most of the time if you're feeling on-edge about something, his main goal will be to just listen to you talk and validate your feelings. he doesn't really make it a point to give you advice or try to be logical, unless you directly ask for it
he's great at listening!!! he also doesn't trust his own advice enough to say it to someone else.
he really tries to think hard about what comforts him when he's anxious, and so he tries to use the tactics for you. for instance, he tries to help you get into a hobby like painting to have a bit more control over yourself
hc that tweek loves to draw with crayons so he'll make little drawings of you and him as stick figures being all happy and give them to you. as a treat
overall he is very attentive, and cares a lot. he tries his very best to be there for you, and a lot of the time that results in you two just hanging out or gaming together, so you can both get your mind off of things for a while. it makes him happy to be able to be there for someone else like craig was for him
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mspaintbrush · 1 month
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Mauga thoughts
He is a biter
He WILL bite you if you hold him down
The only one who can really keep Mauga under control after Baptiste left Talon is Doomfist
Doomfist uses violence for that (of course) (he has been bit while holding him down) (uses his gauntlet hand around Maugas head now)
Mauga refuses to let Moira experiment on him (even though she'd love to), my boy has had enough of unpermitted alterations to his body, even though he liked the changes the first time
He really doesnt get along with Reaper
Reaper is very bitter/serious/stern about the fights and Talon's mission, completely opposite of Mauga who sees it as a game and a fun way to spend his time
Reaper tells Mauga regularily that this isnt a game and that he should stop playing with dying men
Mauga is not impressed by any of reapers threats, he finds them amusing at best
#1 reaper bully, walks through him on purpose on a daily basis just cause he likes the feeling of the smoke on his skin
Sombra sympathizer
There are not many other fun people to spend time with at Talon anyways
Sombra is weary of him and pretty quickly saw through his happy and laid-back mask when she watched him in battle
But she also doesnt have many optional conversation partners at the base, so they hang out and bully Reaper together
Sombra is fascinated with how he gets his hair so nice and fluffy (the secret is the blood of your enemies)
Pranks him sometimes by putting sticky notes on his back that he cant reach because he is too buff
He can play Ukulele or at least owns one (canon)
It used to belong to Baptiste
Mauga took it from his things after he left Talon, its his only reminder of their time together
Sometimes Mauga just holds it and plays a few notes when he is reminiscing
Together with his guns one of the only things he hates people touching
Could work really well with Lucio if he wanted to
Maybe I'm writing Lucio a bit very naive here but I feel like he could be fooled by Mauga's personality (and Mauga would take full advantage of that)
Like he would bring this dude to the base á la "hey guys meet my new friend he plays ukulele and is really fun" with Mauga just grinning as everyone stares in horror
Baptiste used Mauga as a couch during their Talon times (illegal murder operations dont really provide comfortable resting places, so you make due)
Both miss it, both have no one close enough to replicate the feeling (which doesnt mean they dont try)
Mauga leans his guns on his side or the ukulele on his chest, but since everyone has enough common sense to not go anywhere near him thats all he can do
I think it would be funny if during a mission brief a very tired Sigma leans onto him (he doesnt have this famous common sense to really notice the danger radiating off Mauga) and everyone holds their breath as it happens. Against all odds Mauga doesnt say anything as he quietly enjoys it. Its not a common occurence, much to Mauga's disappointment.
Baptiste sits on the side of the couch, owns a very big pillow and the tendency to lean onto people if he gets very tired (since most people arent a 6 foot mountain of muscle  though, they dont really have the necessary strength to hold him)
Some eventually catch on and subliminally try to persuade Reinhardt to sit next to Baptiste more often. Maybe Reinhardt notices it too, but definitely not as the first lets be honest. (Reinhardt is the general couch for everyone in Overwatch who wants to, i dont make the rules)
Mauga's body needs a LOT of nutrients and protein to keep up its shape, more so with him working out on the side, so this man is constantly eating
This guy is a foodie, gets really gnarly when he's hungry and even more ruthless and unpredictable
Fish is a main food in Samoa, but since Mauga has a strong connection to the ocean and the ecosystem behind it I dont think he would eat any fish he didnt catch himself. And he doesnt trust Talon enough to verify where the fish came from. So no fish for him right now.
Is a sweettooth, there a lot of sweet samoan dishes featuring coconut milk and fresh fruit from the island
He probably often complains about the cheap quality of the fruits Talon have to offer him. They get picked too early before truly ripe or just dont seem to have the same intense flavor as an island grown fruit would have.
Can and will crack a coconut easily by hand. Or rather by teeth.
(I wonder if that is humanly possible)
(I looked it up. You need around 610N to crack open a coconut. Humans can bite with about 1000-1400N. So its possible. Crazy.)
Being used to warm and tropical weather he struggles with any mission too far up north. He has to wear more clothing during those, limiting his mobility and effectiveness.
Probably has a hard time finding fitting clothes in general, Talon has a special seamstress just for this case. (And for Doom and Sigma too probably, they are huge)
Is a very well educated man and still keeps up with recent studies and research, especially revolving around marine biology.
He doesnt show this side of him in public, only reading when he is alone in his room.
Sigma is able to gain access to whatever books and publications he wants, nobody really double checks because they dont care or wouldnt understand anyway. So Mauga puts his desired books on Sigma's list and takes them from his lab once they arrive.
Sombra picks up on this eventually, since she spends a lot of time with Sigma. What will she do with this information? Who knows.
Sigma isnt aware of this but does wonder why there are books about non-physics topics around. Sometimes he looks at the colourful reef pictures.
Scuba Sigma - the origin story
favourite animal: shork
He knows how vital they are for marine life and relates to them.
They look and are told to be extremely aggressive, but arent. They still are incredibly powerful and efficient killing machines though. There is a nice metaphor compared to himself here. Somewhere.
Corrects anyone badmouthing sharks and doesnt care if that feels "out of character" to bystanders
Always wanted to learn how to surf but is lacking balance and a normal body size. And since being in Talon, time. And water. Everything really, but he thinks about it sometimes.
Good swimmer, his body shape is not super helpful but he makes up for it with great strength and form
Loves to dive, not necessarily in whole gear, but he can hold his breath longer than average
Generally just enjoys being in water
Knows how to catch fish (of course)
Usually you'd catch fish with a traditional net or maybe hook and rod, but Mauga knows how to spearfish and sometimes does it to show off
If there are no current missions he helps out carrying cargo and other equipment around Talon quarters. Its something of a practical workout for him.
Not a drinker. One or two bottles of beer at most. He wants to be in full control and aware of his sorroundings at all times.
He does pretend to be more intoxicated to provoke bystanders to let their guard down.
If he truly gets wasted he is the silent type. The "stares at you uncomfortably from a corner"-type. His extroverted and noisy facade disappears, revealing the cunning and sadistic spirit inside.
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thewertsearch · 1 year
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See, these three make perfect sense for Dave. We've got the funny meme troll, the funny meme troll, and the funny meme troll who's flirting with him.
TC: ArE YoU ReAdY TC: To gEt tHe hOrNs yOu dOnT HaVe TC: CoNfIsCaTeD AlL LiKe tHe mOtHeRfUcKiN HoNkTrAbAnD ThEy aRe TC: BeInG AlL IlLiCiT As tHe vAsT JoKe iTsElF
Aradia just mentioned the 'Vast Joke', and now Gamzee is using it as part of his trolling efforts. I guess it's a part of Sburb's lore that the kids haven't yet encountered.
I doubt Gamzee will be enlightening us, though. He probably just thinks it's a juggalo thing.
TC: YoU GeTtInG YoUr hOrNs aLl hAnDeD To yOu, If yOu pEePs aNaToMiCaLlY WeRe sUcH To bE LiKe tHaT TC: DoInG ThAt's tO MeAn lIkE YoU GoT MoThErFuCkIn sAsSeD OuT TC: As iN TrOlLeD
It honestly takes a minute of painstakingly parsing his text to even realize that he's trolling - which means he's already succeeded.
TG: oh god thats right TG: you were the best troll
See, Dave gets it!
TG: it was months ago for me TG: you did your bizarrely oblivious juggalo thing TG: then bitched and moaned at me for ruining your religion or some horseshit TG: like i guess a weird crisis in faith i dunno TG: and then TG: you kinda got over that i guess
We haven't seen this conversation, but I could pretty much write it myself:
Gamzee raps at Dave.
Dave memes on Gamzee for being a juggalo.
Gamzee learns that he's worshipping a band from Earth, and realizes how bizarre his situation is.
Then he immediately gets over it. Because, y'know, he's stoned out of his mind.
TC: My mInD'S NoT ThAt sHaRp nOw tHoUgH, iT'S BeEn aGeS SiNcE I HaD A GoOd pIe
Or not - maybe he'll sober up soon.
It'd be funny if a straightedge, post-juggalo Gamzee ended up being one of the more competent trolls - although that would mean more conversations iN HiS qUiRk, which I wouldn't exactly relish.
TC: I WaSn't tHe dUdE Of tImE TC: I WaS ThE TC: ThE MoThErFuCkIn TC: BaRd oF TC: FuCk
Oh, he's a bard! Hell yeah!
Bards are my favorite D&D class. They're charismatic generalists, with a fun, musical flavor to their abilities. It's a good fit for Gamzee, too - bard isn't far from jester, which isn't far from clown.
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In Sburb, I imagine that it's an oddball class for Players who don't dance to anyone's tune but their own.
Gamzee barely qualifies as a Player, and is hardly aware of the game going on around him - but I'm sure he'll have his moment to shine. It's worth noting that, if built correctly, a Bard can also be one of the most powerful classes in D&D.
TG: do you remember if you watched any videos TG: from earth [...] TG: youve got to check this out TG: trust me itll lift your spirits shit will all make sense to you finally TG: youll finally figure out who you are and why you worship all this ridiculous clown bullshit [...] TG: http://tinyurl.com/MoThErFuCkInMiRaClEs
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Dave has decided he may as well kickstart Gamzee's crisis of faith...
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...and accidentally kickstarts a kimessitude that will be written in the stars.
Eat your heart out, Karkat.
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