#joji fluff
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It’s..you??
I had this thought last night so like :3 enjoy
When Joji left for New York from Osaka , you had one Polaroid to treasure that day by, the day you ran home collapsing into your mothers arms as you bawled your eyes out,, the boy you’d grown up with had gone away.
Fanning the Polaroid in the air as the plane took off, you smiled tears still running down your face, you felt angry and sad but still felt some happiness for the boy.
but here you where: 10 YEARS LATER; NEW YORK , BUCHANAN-APARTMENTS
slipping on a T-shirt that joji had given you in Osaka when you stayed at his house , because you’d spilt miso down yours the night prior.
You smiled contentedly, checking yourself out in the mirror before turning away and clipping the Danny pack around your waist.
Not forgetting the lanyard that proudly displayed MEET-AND-GREET ACCESS , SMITHEREENS.
giggling lightly as you stepped out of the apartment , you sighed softly and began the walk to the train line all the way to Madison square garden.
straightening out the shirt whilst tapping your foot on the not so pristine ground of the train line, a large dopey smile spread across your face, knowing you had the Polaroid of the last day you saw joji in your fanny pack you where content.
You did miss the boy, you’d watched him grow whilst filming the rest of filthy Frank, the conclusion and you even listened to the SoundCloud releases, thom etc
CONCERT START: 7:24 PM
watching as he ran onto the stage , the girl smiled , there he was, Joji miller, her childhood best friend and childhood crush, and hell those feelings had never ever left.
Her head began to bop as YUKON (INTERLUDE) began to play , smiling like an idiot as she watched the boy you’d grew up with finally happier than he had been when she’d last seen him.
She knew every lyric to every Smithereens and in tongues delux song , her hands tapped against the railings as the song faded into the city air.
“SHE SAID IM DUMB,, SURROUNDED BY STRANGERS WHEN I HEAR YOUR VOICE, IM TOO DEEP” she sung, almost passionately her voice blending in with the crowd.
the rings on her fingers clinked against the metal of the barrier as joji came closer to the edge of the stage crouching down his hand moving forward , as he moved along toward you , his eyes widened his head tilting, as BLAHBLAHBLAH drifted out just like YUKON had moments prior, the melody of dissolve flew into the surroundings.
She lifted a hand to wave at the boy as he grasped it smiling , butterflies flew through her stomach like they had when they hugged for the last time, as he planted a small kiss on the crown of her head.
“Do you feel complacent on the outside?” She harmonised as the other man on the stage smiled at her standing up he ran back to his place in the middle of the large stage.
The melody of die for you began to fade in as the tears began to fall down her face, this was the song that got her through so much when she missed the man now infront of her on a stage.
“Swear I couldn’t sleep a wink last night, no point in turning off the light.” They duetted their voices flowing together just like they had all those years ago before he left.
“Not the same without your head on my shoulders.” it was true, Joji felt it too, he missed the weight of the girls head in his shoulders.
“Growin pains but I don’ wanna get older” , once more the lyrics held true, she didn’t want to get older not without seeing him and feeling his skin against hers again.
“Almost like we left it all on read.” , their friendship felt like that after he left.
1AM FREESTYLE began to play again, the songs feeling like they meant more than just a harmless melody it was like a letter written but unsent.
“you know you can make it, but you can’t make it alone.” She breathed the tears now full force down her face as her hands gripped the barrier.
MEET AND GREET, 9:45PM
as she stood last in the line, the person in-front of her left , she could swear she saw the boy jump from his seat as he sped toward her.
“Holy shit, y/n.” He sputtered holding her shoulders
“Joji…” she sniffled wrapping her arms around his shoulders as he returned the action.
#joji#joji lyrics#joji fluff#joji x reader#concert#Joji concert#meet and greet#Long lost#smithereens#smithereens by joji#madison square garden#Spotify
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Glimpse Of Us | Spencer Reid x F! Reader
Summary: After a painful breakup, you and Spencer try and move on, but find yourselves seeking out each other in different people. Inspired by "Glimpse Of Us" by Joji.
Also cross-posted on Wattpad and AO3. Link to my masterlist for everything else I’ve posted
wc: 7.1k
content warnings: soul-crushing angst, emotional turmoil
His fingers find the velvet box in his pocket and he opens it. The ring inside is divine, he had it created just for you. The gemstone in the center reflects the warm light of his apartment beautifully as he admires it. He can't help but to imagine what it would look like on your finger, where it belongs.
As she exits the bedroom, he's quick to hide the box from her view. For the rest of the night he feels as if he's putting on a performance, one in which he half heartedly kisses her while he thinks of your lips, and he holds her with your body in mind.
-----
Closing the door behind him, Spencer is welcomed home after a long day with soft lighting and the smell of dinner. He shrugs his coat off and places it on the rack beside the door, thankful for the warm air after being in the cold most of the day.
As he takes his shoes off, he feels her arms wrap around him, her forehead resting on his back as she embraces him from behind. Spencer's eyes close in comfort, thankful for her loving ways. He turns around and hugs her back, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead.
"I ran you a warm bath and I'll have dinner waiting for you when you get out." Her voice is soft and warm, full of nothing but the most tender love. Spencer pushes a strand of hair behind her ear with a small smile on his face,
"Thank you." He presses a second kiss to her forehead before retreating to the bedroom so he can indulge in a warm bath.
The water relaxes his tense muscles and offers a much needed reprieve. The case the team had closed today was nothing short of miserable. The air was unforgivably cold, the wind was harsh, and of course they were searching for a body for most of the day. He had wanted nothing more than to come home since the first moment he stepped foot outside this morning.
After putting on the sweats she had laid out for him on the counter, he joins her at the dinner table where a plate and a glass of wine waits for him. They eat in silence, comfortable with just the presence of each other. There's never any pressure to make conversation, they both have a mutual understanding that sometimes silence is more appreciated, especially after particularly difficult days. But what she doesn't know is that when silence settles, his mind drifts to you.
Spencer is beyond thankful for her devotion despite the chaotic life he leads. If there's one thing he can count on, it's for her to brighten his days and take the weight of the world off his shoulders when it becomes too much for him to bear. She is nothing short of perfection, a genuine blessing that Spencer is glad to have.
And because she's so perfect, it makes Spencer feel all the more guilty when he finds himself wishing it was you waiting at home for him instead of her.
The guilt has been eating at Spencer for a while now. He knows it's unfair to her, to constantly be comparing her to you but he can't quite bring himself to break up with her. It wouldn't be such a big deal if he didn't see bits and pieces of you within her. With her, he's reminded of how you laughed, the way you hugged him, and so many more small details that he just can't let her go; for if he lets her go then he would lose all of those small reminders and memories. It's selfish, he knows, but the appeal of seeing flashes of you through her is more compelling than doing what is fair for her sake.
Once dinner has been finished and cleaned up, the two of them find themselves on the couch, cuddled under green and umber colored faux fur blankets while a movie plays. But Spencer isn't really paying attention to the movie, no, his focus is on how she holds him and how it isn't quite right. Her grasp is always too loose and her hands never find the right spots. While her embrace is comforting, it's nothing compared to how you used to hold him so tight, and it all felt so right.
During a particularly quiet scene, she looks up to Spencer with doe eyes, and he can tell she's studying him, like she has him figured out down to a science.
"What's wrong honey?" She asks him, running a comforting hand up his arm. Shaking the thoughts of you from his mind, he smiles down to her with guilt creeping up within him.
"Just had a bad day." Is all he tells her. For he can never tell her the truth, that he'll never love her the way he loved you. It wouldn't be right, and none of it is her fault. He doesn't see the need to tell her he's only passing time in her arms, the ones that will never hold him the way he needs.
With big, beautiful eyes she continues to look at him, appreciating the tiny details that makes Spencer so beautiful. And while he should be appreciating her with the same loving gaze, all he can bring himself to do is think about how you used to look at him the same way.
As he looks into her eyes that look eerily similar to yours, he's catapulted into a memory, a time where things were perfect.
- - - - -
"Well why not both?" You ask Spencer, who's holding up two blankets to choose from. It's the first winter that you two are sharing together in Spencer's apartment and you both found out the hard way that even Virginia can get quite cold.
"You want them both?" He asks you, eyes glancing between the dark green and the rich brown colored blankets in his hands, both made of warm, plush material. You nod your head and motion for him to put them both in the cart.
"Yes, both of them. The colors compliment each other and they'll look right at home on the couch." A smile finds its way to your face as he places both of the blankets into the cart.
Spencer didn't need much convincing and you both knew it. All you had to do was give him the puppy eyes and he would bend to your every will. He would do anything to keep a smile on your face, and if that meant getting two blankets instead of one, then it was a small compromise he was happy to make.
Later that night the two of you sit entangled on the couch, under one of the new blankets. Spencer sat with his back against the arm rest and he had pulled you between his legs, his arms wrapped securely around your waist. Your head rested back on his chest and your eyes closed as soft music played from the vintage record player Spencer had recently bought.
Spencer savors the way you warm him, the way your body feels soft under his touch, and he appreciates the smell of vanilla that you always seem to have. He watches with adoring eyes as your chest rises and falls evenly, letting him know that you've fallen asleep. The apartment is dimly lit from a lamp, and its warm glow illuminates your features perfectly. Spencer can never get enough of just looking at you, each time he finds something new to love.
His eyes trail from the slope of your nose to the curve of your lips before noticing the way your eyelashes softly lay against the top of your cheekbones, gentle like a feather floating through the breeze. He had never seen such effortless beauty, both inside and out, and his heart feels like it could explode from trying to fit all the love he has for you within.
Kissing the crown of your head, he gently wakes you up and leads you to bed, and he can't help but smile as you hold his hand the entire way there. Your small hand fit into his like they were made for each other.
Once the two of you had settled in bed, you reach your arms around Spencer and hold him close to you. While you enjoy being held by him, you like to return the favor. You want him to come to you for comfort and security, you want to provide a loving warmth to him, to show him how much you love him when your words fall short of expressing the truth depths of your adoration.
His skin is warm under your touch and you press a soft kiss in between his shoulder blades. You're not sure if he'll be here in the morning due to work, so you hold him tight and soak in every second you get with him.
As the two of you drift off, Spencer rests his hand atop yours that rests just below his chest, not able to get enough of you tonight. There was something in the air this evening that made Spencer realize that you are the love of his life, and he wants to spend every night with your arms around him.
- - - - -
Snapping out of his daydream, Spencer realizes that the movie had come to an end. His hand lingers on the blanket for just a moment longer than necessary before he heads to bed, where she is sure to join him soon. He gets underneath the covers, his hand resting on the empty space beside him. His chest aches and he bites the inside of his cheek to stop from getting emotional as she walks in, a sleepy smile on her face.
Spencer goes through the motions of bidding her a goodnight before he turns away from her. He doesn't know if he's disgusted with himself for thinking of you while she lays next to him, or if he's sad he let another woman take your spot. As her hand makes its way around his waist, he's unable to stop the single tear that drips down his cheek.
He waits for her to fall asleep before he slinks out of bed. He puts his shoes on and shrugs on his coat before leaving. The walls of his apartment seem to be closing in on him tonight, and perhaps he needs some fresh air. Snow flurries fall as he walks the empty streets, illuminated by street lamps and starlight.
Spencer wipes his eyes of the tears that form in his lash line and sniffles every few seconds. He has no destination in mind, but he know where his body will take him. It's the same place he goes every time, the spot where he met you.
The bench is covered in a light layer of snow along with everything else in the park. He's unable to tear his eyes away from the spot he first saw you at, as if you would suddenly appear out of thin air. Spencer remembers very vividly the day he met you. He was at the park playing chess, trying to get better so he could finally beat Gideon, when he saw you.
You had your nose buried in a mystery novel, your hair was partially pinned back so it wouldn't get in your way, and you had the prettiest sundress on that complimented your skin tone wonderfully. Spencer had never been one to believe in love at first sight until he saw you. He swears that day the sunlight was focused on you alone, as everything else became utterly dull.
And Spencer had never been one to go out of his way to talk to a woman, but something within him told him that if he didn't seize this opportunity then he would regret it. So he pushed himself out of his comfort zone and talked to you. You were the sweetest woman ever, and he's still surprised to this day that you had given him your number after he babbled and rambled trying to get to the point.
What he wouldn't give to be able to go back and do it all over again.
- - - - -
Three months after you had left Spencer he found himself once again being interrogated about his love life by his coworkers. They mean well, and he knows it, but he wishes they would stop bringing the topic up, because every time they do it's like reopening the wound. But he doesn't want to concern anyone with how poorly he's actually handling the separation, they all have their own issues just as he does.
"You sure you're ready for that date?" Derek asked him one Friday afternoon, asking about the blind date he had set up for Spencer.
"Of course I am, I think I'm finally moving on, and I'm sure she's lovely." Spencer smiles to Derek, but there's a bitter taste on his tongue.
There's no chance that this mystery woman could ever compare to you. But he tells everyone he's moved on from you so that they might stop bringing you up in conversation. Though he knows that you had made friends with his coworkers as well and he knows they probably miss you too. But for his own sanity, Spencer had to find a way to keep them from speaking about you; and what better way to do that than date someone new?
But while Spencer was busy acting like he had moved on, it seems that you actually had.
A year after you had left, against his better judgment, Spencer looked you up to see how you were doing. He had refrained from doing so up to this point, but he couldn't help himself. He had to know, he had to see you.
What he found devastated him. On your Instagram was a photo of you and a man, cheeks pressed against each other's with wide smiles. The first thing Spencer noticed was how your smile finally reached your eyes again, how you looked genuinely happy. A look he hadn't seen in a long time.
But he couldn't stop there, he had to know more. He had to make sure that this man wasn't some psychopath. And it turns out he seems to be the embodiment of the American dream. Spencer found that your new man works in wealth management, owns his own property with a fenced in yard, and appears to be head over heels in love with you.
The man's social media is cluttered with photos of you. You smile in each one as if you were seeing color for the first time. Spencer goes through his photos, looking at vacations you took to Europe, evenings spent on a boat, and every small detail in between that the man had posted about. Spencer had to put his phone away after he saw a picture of you in the man's lap, his hands on your waist as he kissed your cheek while you smiled at the camera.
Spencer thinks often about how the man treats you. He wonders if the new man appreciates your tender touch, your kind heart, if he cherishes you like he used to. Spencer can't help but to ponder if your new man gives you everything he couldn't; if he comes back home to you every night and if the two of you plan to have a family one day.
And when those thoughts get to be too painful, Spencer wonders if you ever think of him. He hopes that you search for pieces of him in your new man, even in just the most minuscule details. Sometimes with this hope comes along the thought of if you will ever come back to Spencer.
But that hope is usually crushed with the realization that you're living in a new chapter, one in which he will never have the privilege to read.
- - - - -
The sweet smell of blueberry pancakes wafts through the house and wakes you. You take a deep breath of the fruity scent and stretch, enjoying the way that today has started. There are definitely worse ways to wake up. Instead of getting up right away, you opt to stay snuggled under the warm covers, your eyes closed as you breathe in the sugary sweetness.
"Good morning honey." You hear your boyfriend open the door, his voice deep and raspy from the night. At the sound of his voice, you can't help but to open your eyes and smile at him.
"What's the occasion?" You stretch once more as he walks over to you, looking down at you with doting eyes.
"Oh I don't know, I think it might be someone's birthday. Yeah, I think I remember someone telling me that the most beautiful girl in the world has a birthday today." He leans down and presses a kiss to your lips, the taste of blueberries lingering between you.
"You didn't have to make me breakfast." You sit up, pushing the covers away so you can go enjoy the pancakes that were so lovingly made. Your boyfriend only smiles wider,
"Don't worry this is just the beginning. I've got a whole day planned for you, baby." You try to fight the smile, not wanting him to know just how excited you are.
The two of you eat pancakes together at the table, your heart swelling with love from his gesture. Both of you know he's not the best cook in the world, but to you these are the best pancakes you've ever had. In fact, they could be burnt to a crisp and you would love every bite because he took the time to try and do something nice for you, and it's the effort you appreciate above all.
Licking syrup off your lip, your eyes find themselves fixated on your boyfriend's face and you can't help but be mesmerized. His eyes are kind and gentle, his smile is wide and welcoming, and you just don't know if you will ever get enough of him.
Though a tiny voice makes itself known in the back of your mind and it reminds you of just why you find your boyfriend to be so beautiful.
But you try your best to ignore the voice that whispers to you from within your own mind. You don't want to hear how your boyfriend's hair is the same shade of brown or how his eyes hold the same hue of green that Spencer's did. The voice works diligently to remind you that your boyfriend's hands don't feel the same and that his lips aren't as soft, and you wish that it would just stop. Everything would be so much easier if you could just forget Spencer Reid even exists, but no matter how hard you try you can never silence the whispers.
You'd be lying to yourself if you said you didn't still think of Spencer sometimes. Especially during the early days of your new relationship. When you first got together with your new boyfriend you were constantly reminded of Spencer. Your new boyfriend shared many features with Spencer such as his height, build, and hair color and you know it's no coincidence. You know full well that you gravitated to your new boyfriend because of these similarities, you were desperate to hold onto any part of Spencer that you could.
But your new boyfriend is different from Spencer in a lot of ways as well. He's more headstrong, he doesn't think things through as well, and he can't read you quite like Spencer could. But despite these differences you found yourself loving him for who he is.
Your new boyfriend practically worships the ground you walk on. He's entirely devoted to you and he reminds you every day of how much he loves you. He comes home at the same time every night, he's here when you need him to be, and just recently has opened up to you about one day possibly starting a family. He's everything you've ever wanted.
It had taken some time to adjust to something new and unfamiliar but it was worth it. You had been hesitant to get into another relationship, worried that you wouldn't be able to love anyone as much as you loved Spencer. It would be entirely unfair to the other person, and so you had asked your current boyfriend for patience; and this man had no problems waiting. In fact, you were convinced he would wait until the end of times if you had asked him to.
He was never overbearing, never pressured you for an answer or to go on a date before you were ready. Instead, the two of you built a friendship first. You would go for coffee on Saturday mornings, walks in the park after work, and even played a few rounds of mini golf. It was in those small moments that you found yourself falling head over heels for the man and eventually you felt that you were ready.
After a few months of being together, he had insisted you join him on a business trip to Europe. At first you didn't really know, you were nervous about being somewhere unfamiliar, but you trusted him to take care of you. And you're glad you went, it was the best trip you had ever been on. Your boyfriend treated you to candlelit dinners, a gondola ride, and the most tender, pure love possible. For the first time in a long time, you felt happy and it was all because of him.
Your mind drifts from memories of Europe to the conversation about starting a family. You remember the conversation almost word for word and you find yourself reflecting on it more than what is probably normal. But you can't help yourself, that conversation had opened your eyes about your true desires and left you feeling conflicted about a lot of things you still don't have the answers to.
- - - - -
It was a bright Sunday afternoon and you strolled down the street with your boyfriend hand in hand, enjoying the warm weather and freshness of spring. The grass was finally coming back to life, the trees were blooming, and flowers were beginning to pop up again.
"I want to ask you something, but you don't have to answer if you don't want to." Your boyfriend uncharacteristically stumbles over his words as the two of you veer off to a less busy path.
"You can ask me anything." You truthfully tell him, wanting him to know that he can come to you about anything. After all, there's nothing he can throw at you that would catch you off guard after your years with Spencer and the stories he would come home with.
"Have you ever thought about having kids someday?" Your pace slows down as his words sink in. You weren't quite sure what you were expecting him to ask, but it certainly wasn't that.
Instead of answering right away, you stop walking completely and look at your boyfriend, seeing nothing but complete seriousness and curiosity written all over his face. Your eye catches his, and your heart sinks when you see a flash of Spencer's eyes in your mind. Blinking away the fleeting image, you sigh and think about how to answer his question.
"I think some day, with the right person, I would most definitely want kids." Your answer is the complete truth, and yet you find yourself feeling guilty for not immediately imagining yourself having kids with your boyfriend, but instead with Spencer.
"Some day." A smile finds its way onto your boyfriend's face and he squeezes your hand lovingly.
Pushing the guilt and all thoughts of Spencer aside, you focus on what you have right in front of you. You have a boyfriend who loves you unconditionally, who wants nothing but the best for you, who you can see yourself spending forever with.
Yet despite loving him back and wanting a future with him, there's still a piece of your soul that yearns for Spencer.
- - - - -
After a long day of birthday celebration, you find yourself laying in bed waiting for your boyfriend to join you. The day had been filled with family and friends and it was probably one of the best birthdays you've had in a long time. But ever since this morning, the voice in the back of your mind hasn't let up.
While you were opening gifts you couldn't help but wonder what Spencer would've picked out. When your boyfriend asked you what top he should wear to best match the rest of the outfit you found yourself wondering what Spencer would've picked. During the drive to your friend's house you considered which songs Spencer would've played on the trip over. You hadn't really thought of Spencer much over the past year, seeing as how happy you were with your boyfriend, but lately you find Spencer infiltrating your thoughts more and more.
Biting the inside of your cheek, you give into temptation and grab your phone. Quickly, you look Spencer up on what limited social media presence he has. Your heart races as his profile loads, unsure of what you're going to see and what you want to see. The photos load and you realize he still hasn't posted anything since the photo you posted for him years ago.
You tap on the tagged photos tab and can't help the heaviness in your chest as you see a photo he was tagged in three months ago. He's got his arms wrapped around a gorgeous woman, her lips pressed to the side of his cheek. Within an instant, your mind replaces the woman's face with your own and you feel your throat begin to close up with emotion. The caption is something cliche about love, and with the same quickness as you had clicked on the photo, you exit out of the app.
It seems Spencer has moved on from you, and you're happy for him. You hope she can handle his lifestyle better than you could, but you can't help but feel sad that he was able to replace you. A tinge of regret takes residence in you for giving him the opportunity to replace you.
- - - - -
Spencer looks in the mirror as he straightens his tie and runs his hand through his hair once more. The velvet box in his pocket makes his heart hammer but the sound of her voice knocks him out of an anxiety-ridden spiral.
"We're going to be late, come on." She says with a smile on her face. Spencer knows he should be just as excited but the nerves take precedence.
The two of them enter the dimly lit restaurant and take their seat. The tablecloth is white, there's a candle in the middle of the table. Spencer knows it's the perfect time to propose. After all, today is their second anniversary.
She talks openly about what she's going to order and how she knows the food is going to be delightful. Spencer does his best to smile and nod, trying to calm his trembling fingers. He had considered proposing for a few months now and decided tonight would be perfect.
After the waiter comes and takes their orders, Spencer reaches across the table and takes her hands within his. Her skin is soft and smooth, but as he rubs his thumb across the back of her hand he remembers how delicate your skin used to feel under his touch.
Guilt intermingles with the nerves, and he feels disgusted with himself that even as he's about to propose he thinks of you. And the guilt is reinforced when he remember who he bought the ring for in the first place, it most certainly wasn't her.
Delaying the question, Spencer keeps making small talk until the food arrives. He takes glances over to her, and she always smiles back. And Spencer tries his best to act normal, but he knows he's failing.
For every time he looks at her all he can see is you. Every time he looks into her eyes he sees yours, he remembers how you used to gaze at him for what seemed like hours. Each time she pushes her hair behind her shoulder he remembers how yours used to always look effortlessly perfect. Even the shade of her lipstick brings him back to a memory when you wore a similar shade.
She laughs at a poor joke he made, and the sound of her laughter is replaced with yours in Spencer's mind. He realizes then that he can't possibly ask her to marry him.
When the two of them arrive back at the apartment, she rushes off to change into something more comfortable and Spencer hangs back in the kitchen, taking a seat at the dining table.
His fingers find the velvet box in his pocket and he opens it. The ring inside is divine, he had it created just for you. The gemstone in the center reflects the warm light of his apartment beautifully as he admires it. He can't help but to imagine what it would look like on your finger, where it belongs.
As she exits the bedroom, he's quick to hide the box from her view. For the rest of the night he feels as if he's putting on a performance, one in which he half heartedly kisses her while he thinks of your lips, and he holds her with your body in mind.
- - - - -
"Where are you going?" Spencer steps in front of her, blocking her path. He had returned home only an hour earlier to find that she had packed all of her things and called her friend to pick her up. She looks back up at him, and he clearly sees the disdain in her eyes.
"I can't do this anymore Spencer. I don't know what happened or what I did wrong, but I can tell you don't love me, and you haven't for a while." Her words shock him, but he can't find it within himself to contradict what she's saying; she's right after all.
"You didn't do anything, I'm sorry." Is all he's able to offer her as he steps aside and lets her go. She shakes her head, tears gleaming in her eyes as she grabs the handle of her last bag and leaves without looking back.
Spencer is left alone in his apartment and he bites his cheek as he looks around. She had taken everything she owned, not a trace remains. While he should feel devastated that she left him, he only feels relieved. The guilt that's been eating him alive for years is finally gone and he knows that this was the best possible outcome for her; he hopes she can find someone who cherishes her the way she deserves.
His eyes fall on the blanket draped over the back of the couch and suddenly this situation feels all too familiar. Spencer is unable to tear his eyes away from the blanket as his mind reminds him in perfect detail the most painful day of his life.
- - - - -
"Spencer, move. Let me go." Your voice is firm but it wavers as you finish the sentence. You had your last bag in your hand and you had hoped to be out of here before Spencer got back home.
"No, please don't do this. Please don't go." Spencer begs you as tears fall down his cheeks. Pained by his sadness, a tear falls down your own. You so desperately wish you could stay, that things could work between the two of you.
"Maybe if things were different I could stay." You say, using your free hand to wipe you eyes.
Before you can be convinced to stay, you step around Spencer and head out the door, leaving behind the best and worst days. When you hear the door shut behind you, you're unable to stop the onslaught of tears that flow down your face as you go to your car parked alongside the curb. The last bag gets carelessly tossed in your car before you drive off.
Spencer watches from his window as you leave, your car disappearing into the night. He collapses against the wall and sobs. It doesn't feel real, he can't wrap his mind around the fact that you had actually left.
Hours later he finds the will the stand up and he sniffles the entire way to the bedroom where there's a crisp white paper laid on his pillow. Spencer turns on a light before he grabs the paper and before he reads a single word he notices how some of the ink is smudged, like tear drops had fallen before it had time to dry.
Soon enough, his tear drops fall onto the paper as well. Each word is like a dagger to his heart and yet he reads it over and over and over again.
Spencer,
By the time you read this, I won't be here. Please don't come looking for me. We both knew things weren't going well for a long time, and I didn't see any way we could compromise. It's not fair to you and it wasn't fair to me to stay, we would drive each other to endless misery at some point if something didn't give.
I wish things could have been different for us, but I just couldn't handle it anymore. We both want different things and that's okay. You love your job and it was unfair of me to try and persuade you to pursue something else for my sake, and for that I am sorry. It would've been nice to have you home every night, to know that you could be here for the big and small moments of life. But I understand that that way of life isn't something you're made for, and that's okay too. I'm sorry I'm not built for the life you lead, I tried my best for as long as I could.
You will always have a piece of my heart for as long as I shall live. I wish you nothing but the best. You've got a lot to offer the world, my beautiful Spencer Reid.
I love you, always.
His heart may as well have been ripped from his chest and shattered into a million irreparable pieces. As he reads and rereads your words he can't believe that you blamed yourself, that you felt the need to apologize for wanting a normal life.
He recalls the first time you had asked him about a career change. To him it came out of nowhere, but when he really starts to think about it, he should've seen it coming. There were times he would come home and your eyes would be just a little bloodshot and your cheeks would be unusually red. Of course you told him it was just allergies, but the pictures of you two scattered over the coffee table should've told him it was something else entirely.
The texts asking him if he would be home for your birthday were answered with a negative, along with the questions about Christmas, Valentines Day, and just about every other occasion. He wanted to be there with you, there's no place he would have rather been, but the job required him to be across the country more times than not. He should've realized that you had stopped asking those questions a year ago.
His memory allows him to see into the past, and as it's said, hindsight is 20/20. The last year of the relationship he often found himself coming home to you already in bed, when you used to stay up and wait for him. Perhaps you had been so accustomed to disappointment that you had assumed something would come up and that he wouldn't be home when he told you he would.
Within those memories he also notices how sad you seemed. Though he didn't see it at the time, he sees now how your smile stopped reaching your eyes and you stopped trying to plan things for the two of you to do on his days off. Instead of going out, you told him that you just wanted to spend time with him.
There's a particular memory that comes to the forefront of his mind, about a month before you left he remembers the two of you on the couch. You had snuggled into his side, head resting on his shoulder as the two of you watched a movie. He really hadn't been paying attention, he was focused on how warm you were, how he was happy he could finally be here with you. But if he had been following the movie, he would've seen that you turned it off just before the happy ending where the two characters lived out the rest of their days together. He should've noticed then how the tip of your nose turned red and how you wiped your eyes, claiming it was just from being tired.
His chest aches deeply as he understands the pain he's put you through. All you wanted was him, and he had let you slip right through his fingers without even realizing.
For days, weeks, and months after you left Spencer finds himself sleeping with the blanket you had picked out, for it's the last piece of yourself that you left him with. And after a while, your scent faded, but the memories remain.
And ever since, he found himself chasing anything that could give him even just the smallest reminder of you. He only hopes that one day your paths will cross again and that you will find your way back where you belong; back to him.
- - - - -
The room feels colder and darker than usual. There's no sweet smell of pancakes floating in the air, there's nobody next to you to keep you warm. No, all of those comforts had left a week ago. The moment in which everything crumbled replays constantly in your mind.
In front of you, your boyfriend dropped to one knee and held out a glistening ring. With tears in his eyes, he poured his heart out to you, speaking about how he's beyond in love with you and that he wants to grow old with you. That there's nobody else on this Earth he can imagine coming home to, holding close, and cherishing dearly.
You could almost hear his heart break as you told him that you couldn't marry him. And not two days later, he had moved out without speaking a single word to you. Everything you spent years building, gone in an instant. But what haunts you the most is the look in his eye, it's the same despair you saw in Spencer's when you had left him.
But you knew you had made the right decision not to marry your boyfriend. You loved him deeply, but after the conversation about starting a family you realized that you didn't want that future with anyone but Spencer. But that future isn't a possibility, you're keenly aware of that. So it seems you're destined to live out your days reminiscing about Spencer Reid.
With time you know you had forgotten some of the memories and it's when you try to remember them that you find yourself wishing you had Spencer's memory. By now you figure he's done his best to bury the memory of you while you try to dig yours back up.
There's one memory you cling to the most, and when sorrow begins swallowing you whole, you relive that memory, wanting to go back in time and live in that moment forever.
It was a chilly fall day, the leaves had just started to turn colors. Spencer and you had been together just shy of a week but it seemed like neither of you could get enough of one another. In every second of free time you two had, you were together. He explained that his job required him to travel a lot, but you didn't really mind, he was worth waiting for.
The two of you walked with intertwined hands through the park where you met, and take a seat on the bench. Spencer wanted to come by after the date he planned, a cozy coffee cafe with your favorite pastries. You had never experienced someone taking an interest in you, and your heart felt full knowing he went out of his way to learn what you liked.
With lovestruck eyes, you look over at him and brush his cheekbone with your free hand, wanting to memorize every detail of him. His skin is smooth, eyes the most brilliant shades of earthy tones, and of course his chocolate curls had you swooning.
You see his eyes dance between yours and your lips, and before you could comprehend what was happening, he pulled you close and kissed you. Your hands had found their way to his face, cradling his jaw as he held your waist.
And as you pulled away you couldn't help the smile that found its way to your face. You had never been one to believe in falling in love so soon after meeting someone, but something about Spencer felt different. It was like your souls were meant for each other, there was an undeniable chemistry from the start. And though you wouldn't say it for another few months, you knew in this moment that you were helplessly in love with Spencer Reid.
But instead of leading a fulfilling life with him by your side, you find yourself utterly alone.
Eventually you make your way into the living room, which now has half of the furniture it did a few days ago. But you don't care, you convinced yourself that it was for the best, and that your now-ex deserves someone better than yourself, someone who wasn't still in love with the person who came before.
You decide to get out of the house and take a walk with no particular destination. The fresh air will hopefully make you feel better. Your mind is anywhere but the present and you hadn't realized that you had made your way to the park. The same one that holds too many bittersweet memories.
But instead of walking somewhere else, you continue on. You hadn't come back here since you left Spencer but it feels right. Lately you've found yourself considering trying to find him again, but ultimately you decide against it, recalling the words you left for him and the fact that it looks like he's found someone new. You love him too much to disrupt what love and peace he may have found.
Taking the familiar path you find yourself walking to the bench where Spencer first introduced himself to you, the bench that had started everything.
As you round the bend you see an older couple sitting there in the very spot you had all those years ago. The woman has her arm linked with the man's and the two of them laugh about something. The sunlight glints off of their wedding bands and you look away as they lean in to kiss each other. Walking by them, you offer a polite smile despite the turmoil you feel inside. They meet your eye as you pass and return your smile with warmth and happiness.
This trip down memory lane leaves you feeling like you had just seen a bit of what your future with Spencer could have looked like, the two of you grey-haired but still head over heels for each other.
But you know that can never be a reality, and so you'll have to find a way to settle for the fleeting glimpse you caught.
-----
Part Two
#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fanfic#dr spencer reid#spencer reid#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid angst#joji#joji inspired#mgg#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#spencer reid fluff#hurt/no comfort#Spotify#heavy angst#emotional turmoil#mutual pining#lost love#spencer reid smut
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|| BRYON DATING HEADCANONS ||
ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ just fluff, reader is gn!! (I've been meaning to do him lol)
Let's be honest, if you were to become his significant other, you would need an awfully lot of patience.
That's because he's not much of a social person, he knows who are his people and that's enough for him.
Personally, I think the only way you'd be friends with him is if you knew someone close to him. Maybe Lorsan or Lyca being the one who introduces him to you.
He doesn't like loud people. No hate. He just finds it stressful as it overwhelms his senses easily.
That's why it comes easily that he prefers someone's who's gentle and kind. Call it cliché but he appreciates beauty when he sees it.
Once your friendship starts to blossom, you'll start to notice the little things he does for you.
How he'd always be there for you if you needed some company, how he would provide you the book you had told him just the other day and how he would listen intently to your opinions even when he doesn't agree with them.
It all made you fall for him just that easy.
However, you didn't expect him to return those feelings because well, you just felt that he was way out of your league. He was too good to be true you know? So when he confessed it turned your world upside down.
Scenario ↴
You'd find yourself seated on a hill, enjoying the sunset with your eyes closed as the cold breeze blew on your face. It was nice to catch a break after finishing a handful of tasks. Suddenly you heard sounds of footsteps approaching from behind, you looked over your shoulder to see it was no other than Bryon.
"I hope I haven't disturbed you, would you mind if I share this view with you?" He'd ask politely.
"Not at all, go ahead" With your approval, he sat himself beside you. The absent of his falcon caught your attention.
"Where's Elona?"
"She's getting her rest. The battles these days have been draining" He said and you nodded to his words before turning to stare at the orange sky.
Neither of you said anything but you both found comfort in each other's presence. Due to his acute hearing, you had a feeling that he enjoyed this peaceful moment just as much as you was right now.
"May I say something?" He said which caught your interest.
"Of course, you don't need to ask" You said and it had him at ease a bit.
Though the way his jaw clenched as if he was debating on what to speak made you wonder if it was something serious.
"(Y/N), I'm afraid I have fallen for you..." He said. You had almost forgotten how to breath properly when you heard him.
"I don't know when it began... it seems like the feeling was always there. But I don't mind it. I choose not to fight these thoughts... because I love that I'm in love with you" He smiled softly at you, the blush on your face making you look ever more adorable to him.
"I wouldn't mind being yours as there isn't anything I wouldn't do for you...ah... my apologies, I'm getting ahead of myself... I didn't give you the time to speak" He said by the time he noticed that your lips were parted in shock. You quickly gained back your composure once the attention was on you.
"I uh... wow... okay..." You rubbed your arm awkwardly. Eventually you were able to think straight after calming yourself down.
"I actually feel the same way Byron... I just didn't think you'd think of me like that" You looked at him, your eyes sparkling with joy.
"Oh (Y/N)... you're all that I think about..."
When the relationship was settled, everyone congratulated you two. Especially Lorsan, he was quick to wish you both endless happiness. You had to admit, from the village's reaction, it almost felt like you two just got married.
His companion, Elona would definitely see you as her owner after a few weeks into the relationship. If he trusts you, she trusts you as well.
In the relationship, Bryon is very loving and observant. The reason why I say observant is because he'll always be fast to know what are your likes and dislikes.
Oh someone offered you a fruit you don't like? He'll simply just take it for you. There's a sale going on at the market and they have one of your favourite things on display? Watch him be the first to be in line to get it.
He also knows when you're lying about something. He hates it however when you lie about not being sick or not being cold because taking care of you is LITERALLY his job!! Besides he doesn't mind babying you, he adores you!
That's why I think his kisses are delicate and soft, most of times he'd hum when kissing but he does it unconsciously because he's completely lost in the moment, if you placed your hands on his chest, you could feel the vibrations from his voice. In a way it's like he's purring.
He loves it the most when you run your hands all over his chest when kissing. It makes him fall even harder than he already has.
If we're talking about PDA, I think he's not that against it but he's also not that crazy about it. He's willing to hold your hand, having hugs and kisses but if you initiate anything that's crossing the line or could make anyone uncomfortable then he'll simply give you a soft smile and shut your thoughts out with a simple forehead kiss.
He enjoys cuddling by the way. He enjoys it the most when you both are like covered in layers of blanket. You once teased him for it, calling it his bird nest which ended becoming an inside joke.
Like you'd be having a conversation with Lorsan and he's trying to be as patient as possible waiting for you to finish but knowing his friend, he's most likely never gonna stop talking so he'd politely invite himself into the conversation.
"Darling... can we go back to the birds nest?" He'd say, meaning he's in desperate need of cuddles. You would smile at his cute request and nod.
"BIRD'S NEST!? (Y/N), is he holding you captive???"
Expectedly, his pet names would be more of the lovey dovey stuff. He'd call you things like darling, sweetheart, baby, and even pumpkin. He enjoys your reaction each time cause you never know which one he'll use.
"You're adorable when you pout darling... oh alright, I'll buy you the candy you want. Only if you promise me a kiss after"
He's a romantic. There's no denying it. This man's love language is 100% act of service.
He's the type to light up dozens of candles at the entrance of the door so that the first thing you are greeted when coming home would be a fancy candlelit dinner prepared just for you.
He also happens to run the shower for you just as you're about to arrive home, he even places flower petals to add some scent to the mood. Anything to help you relax.
He's more of a giver than a receiver but if you ever showered him in love. He's positive that he'll faint. Even a simple "I love you" can cause him to smile all cheerfully.
You also happen to be one of the few people to see his eyes. Obviously he doesn't wear the blindfold to sleep so that's how you were able to get the chance to see him without it.
His eyes are beautiful. A perfect shade of light green and yellow, almost resembling eyes of a bird. They were pearls that entrapped you in a daze that you couldn't help but stare into them each time you cuddled with him.
He didn't mind but rather find it cute how you were in awe from his irises.
Another thing I want to point out is he enjoys holding hands with you, whatever it is, he just finds your hands fascinating.
You two could be cuddled in bed and he'd just have your hand placed on his, his fingers gently trailing against the skin of your palm.
"I love the way your hand fits in mine... it's almost like destiny..." He'd utter.
Since it's canon he has a soothing voice, you can expect him to sing you lullabies or just any song to help you go to sleep if you ever had trouble sleeping.
If you did have a nightmare, trust him to be there to hold you in his arms as he hums you a melody.
Honestly? He's just like Prince Charming but better.
#CA CAW CA CAW#INSTRUCTIONS UNCLEAR DONT LISTEN TO JOJI WHEN YOURE HIGH ON MEDS#IM SICK ASF HELP ME#I SEE HIM IN THE CORNER OF MY ROOM#afk journey#afk journey x reader#afk journey fluff#x reader#fluff#afk journey headcanons#afk journey bryon#bryon afk journey#bryon x reader#afk journey bryon x reader
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memories
pairing : sparrow!ben hargreeves x fem!reader, past!umbrella!ben hargreeves x fem!reader
genre : angst, heartwarming, hurt-comfort
warning : prepare your tissue if you’re attached to umbrella!ben ig
summary : in which she found glimpse of them together through his eyes—the man that wore the face of the love of her life
wordcount : 3k
a/n : inspired by the song glimpse of us by joji. and i am aware that there are a lot of stories especially these days. If there are resemblance between this story with others then that is completely out of my control. great minds thinks alike after all. requested by @torchioethan i’ll try my best to interpreted the song to their relationship. the story is up to your interpretation by the way. on my remus lupin angst i wrote “some endings are meant to he interpreted differently.” also do you think this is ooc for sparrow!ben? cause this is what i think he’ll act like in this situation. also i put some addie larue reference in this iykyk
masterlist
Have you ever lost someone and then you just feel like you see that someone everywhere? Every place, every street, everyone, reminds you of the memories you hold dearly close to your heart no matter how hurt it is to remember for you refuse to ever forget about it. It hurts so much it does, but that’s the price you have to pay.
The first time she saw him again after going back from the 60s with the dysfunctional bunch of siblings, she thought she was dreaming. Perhaps, it’ll be easier if it were just a dream. Cause now she has to look at the face—at the body of someone who once had loved her and found nothing. A stranger with the face of the love of her life.
Same name. Same face. Different memories.
But does it all even matter now? The world is ending in hours. She could meet her Ben again, that only if he really does exist. She has never been the one to fully understand the concept of time and Five doesn’t speak in a language that she is capable of understanding.
She raised her glass of champagne in Luther’s direction as he danced with his newfound love before averting her gaze to take a look around the room. Diego and Lila being in each other's arms. Klaus being Klaus. Five who seem to be enjoying his time with the number of empty glasses on his table. And lastly, him. Sitting on the table far back from everybody else, drinking quietly as his eyes, too, roamed around the room. Even from a distance between the two, she could tell that he was judging all of them silently.
Slowly she rose and walked toward him with her glass wrapped around her fingers. Once she arrived at the spot, she gestured to the seat next to him. “May I?” Without hearing any response from him, she sat herself on the seat, putting her glass on the table. “The party is over there yet you distance yourself from the others, emo boy.”
He rolled his eyes at the nickname she gave him. “If anyone here is emo that would be your brother. All brooding, laying down alone in my room, wearing nothing but black.” He looked over at Viktor and she followed his line of gaze. “First, Viktor isn’t emo, and second, you just prove my point here.” She gestured to his situation right now. “You just described yourself.”
The look in his eyes was nothing like her Ben as he glared at her, glass tightly wrapped around his fingers. “Look, if you’re going here just to brag about your oh-so-perfect Ben. The others had took their chance every time they passed me so don’t even bother.” He leaned forwards to her—trying to somewhat looking intimidating as she looks at him, totally unfazed by it.
“No.” She leaned closer to him as he leaned back, clicking her glass with his. “That is a too sensitive topic for me to talk about. Actually, I was trying to give you some company.”
“Well, I don’t need your company.” He talked back.
She leaned her back on the seat. “Too bad. I’m already comfortable sitting here.”
“Then I’ll just go away from here.” He got up, looking at her irritatingly, clearly annoyed by her presence. Turning around he began to walked away from the girl that has been haunting his mind, but then she said something that made him stop. “You know you don’t want to, Ben. You wished to stay here. You want someone to tell you to stay. So here I am doing you a favor by saying this.”
Walking back towards her, he pointed his finger right in front of her face, a look of exasperation plastered on his face. “You stay out of my head. Don’t even try to use it on me.” He said. “You think you know me. You know nothing about me. Nothing. I don’t need your company and I most certainly don’t need your pity. I don’t need you.”
Her gaze softened at his words, his last words may hurt a part of her but it was nothing she hadn’t heard before. “I don’t need my powers to know what you’re thinking, Ben. Besides, it never works on you. Not on you. Not on any version of you, I suppose.” She looks back to her glass, avoiding his gaze before feeling him walking away from her.
***
Looking at Luther and Sloane, she offered them a large smile. “I’m happy for the both of you. Wish we could have more time to know each other, Sloane.” She said, eyes falling onto the girl that is wrapped around Luther’s arms before looking back at the sky that is torn apart every second that passed. “With the world ending, there’s nothing anyone wants more than spending time with their loved ones. I know I would do the same.” She could feel Luther’s eyes on her as she said that. “Cherish the time you have left together, okay?” That were the last words she uttered before she went back inside the building, leaving the newlywed to have their moments alone.
What she didn’t know was the fact that Ben was listening to her words as he finally succeed to get rid of Klaus’s presence. He was about to grab another drink when he heard her saying that. Spending time with their loved ones. What is left of his family are only Sloane and Reginald. One who is currently with the man of her life. The other one probably conspiring something against someone. Sloane, his sister, what left of his bunch of adoptive siblings, sure there’s a part of him that cares for her although he won’t admit it out loud. On the other side, Reginald doesn’t deserve any love from anyone in the building. An ounce of him may won’t stop trying to prove himself to the guy but he’s sure that there is no love that he holds for the old man.
Before the girl who just entered the building could fully walk passed him, he grabbed her wrist, stopping her in her tracks. She looked at him expectedly, a look of nostalgia flashed for a second. Perhaps it’s the alcohol talking, but the words come out of his mouth without permission at all. “Want a drink?”
She let her hand out of his grasp, raising one of her eyebrows. “Did Klaus really manage to talk some sense into you? Or is it the alcohol talking?” She paused before answering the real question. “The answer’s yes by the way. But not here. Let’s go somewhere else.”
***
“A windowsill?”
“A quite spacious one, yeah.” She put herself in a comfortable position before patting the space in front of her. “Come on. There’s still much room left here.” Rolling his eyes slightly, he sighed before sitting in front of her. Both of them facing each other, on the windowsill as the world out there is falling apart. Her gaze stayed on him as he sat there trying to search for a comfortable position. A nostalgic smile went onto her face. Happiness and sadness all become one as a glimpse of her Ben took over his position for some split second.
A memory from her past.
“Out of every place in this goddamn hotel, you-“ He began to complain.
“Hey, the world is falling apart. Be grateful for a few seconds.” She looked out the window. “Ben would’ve loved this.” She muttered loud enough for him to hear.
“I am Ben.”
“Well, not you. I mean Ben Ben.”
“The other Ben?”
“No. You’re the—Can you just drink it already and try to not be an asshole?” She almost forced the alcohol down his throat if it weren’t for him who already doing that as she spoke before. She looked at him before averting her attention to her glass, muttering under her breath. “Maybe this is a bad idea.”
“Not really. No.” His response caught her off guard as she wasn’t expecting him to even hear her. She pursed her lips, before taking a sip from her glass. “So you do need some company. Is this your attempt to not be alone at the end of the world? Was it because of the speech I gave earlier?” She put it down and then propped her chin on the top of her knee.
This time, he is the one that avoids her gaze, looking at the falling word around them from the window. “I thought you said it didn’t work on me.”
“Just because my powers don’t work on you. Doesn’t mean I’m an idiot who cannot connect the two dots together, emo boy.” She said.
He looks down for a few moments before looking back at her, an uncharacteristic look on his face. “Guess that—guess that makes me a special emo boy or what?” This time he didn’t complain about the nickname. Instead, he said the words that brings a smile to her face. She nodded slowly before leaning back to the window frame and with teary eyes she lets out a chuckle. “What?” He asked, raising one of his eyebrows.
“You’re making it difficult for me to not cry. You see, you’re not supposed to say that. Not with that face.” She paused, taking a deep breath trying to not let the tears out just yet. “Gosh, you don’t just look like him or sound like him. Now, you talked like him. I suppose my prayers are granted in a way. I see you again now. Breathing and alive. Just not—just not the you that I need. It hurts looking into your eyes when all I see is him and yet there is no trace of him in this falling world.”
“What was he like?” His gaze stayed on her, less tense than usual. “Truly. What was he like?” He asked once more.
“What did the others say?” She asked back.
Hesitantly, he answered her question. “He was……kind. Selfless. A tiny dark cloud on a perfect sunny day. A know-it-all. A scold. Most of them-Most of them are bad qualities.” He furrowed his eyebrows together and seems to be frustrated not being able to decipher why the other Ben was so special compared to him. “I’m the Number One. Numero Uno. He wasn’t, was he? All of those praises about him, look how he ended up 6 feet under.”
Brushing over his last comment, she nodded her head. “Well all of them are true. He was a great guy, wasn’t he? One of the best that I ever knew.” Her eyes trailed over the window. “I first met them all when I was around the age of 8 or 9. He was hiding behind Klaus or Number 4 at that moment. He was never been the one to love the public attention but somehow tried to gain mine. I suppose that makes him sweet. After his death, none of us have been the same. All of us were drowning in a sense, well we all have been drowning for a long time. But since that happened, none of us could ever reach the shore.” Her chest got heavy just from thinking of that feeling.
“Where are you now?” He inched closer towards her.
She pursed her lips before letting out a deep breath. “Just floating around, I guess? Not drowning but not completely free either.” She thought about her last interaction with Ben. “Perhaps this is it. With the world ending, I’m getting closer to my final destination.”
Looking back at him, she continued her words. “Ben. He was-He was easier to love out of everyone in that room earlier, out of all the people I’ve known in my whole life. And mind you remember this, I love all of them greatly—well not all of them,” She referred to Reginald. “We all have a fair share of memories together, mostly in our youthful days that are full of trauma created by your daddy dearest—even I had some of mine too and I’m not even a Hargreeves.” Both of them chuckled at her words.
“Very much relatable that last bit. Klaus said a similar thing earlier. About how he was easier to love.” Ben inched closer once more, perhaps this is the alcohol talking, but seeing him open up his feelings to her like this makes her pay no mind to the fact that by tomorrow he’ll probably change into hard-shell Ben again. “That doesn’t seem fair. All of you love him like that yet none can do the same for me.”
Biting back a snarky remark, she decided to say something else instead. “One thing about him is that he makes love seem to be a casual thing to feel, I mean it is, truthfully it is but not many people have the opportunity to realize that.” She wiped a single tear away. “There are a lot of things to pay for when it comes to love. To any kind of love. Meeting you is one of those. The price I have to pay for this moment is not a kind one.”
He nodded quietly before looking back directly into her eyes. “I’m not him, you know?”
She chuckled at his words. “Of course, you’re not. I’ve said that already. If yes then I won’t be just sitting in front of you right now.” I would hold you and never let go like you had wished once before your last moments. The last part remained in her mind. Glimpses of them together flowed around the two, yet she was the only one to remember. “It is a lonely thing, isn’t it? To remember when the other person doesn’t.”
“What if……the other person does?” Her head snapped back towards him as he said so. Letting out a shuddered breath, she opened her mouth to ask what he means by that but she wasn’t able to find her voice at all. Then he continued his words. “You know what sucks, you have all of these memories with your Ben and I-” He took a glance at the sky before looking back at her. “And the only recollection I have about you is the one I had in my dreams. The one that I forgot the moment that I woke up. The one I wished to remember because there’s this feeling that I can’t understand every time I am in that dream.”
“You said all you see when you look into my eyes are him. Yet when I see into yours all I see is you. No other version you. Just you you cause you’re the same one from my dreams. The dreams that left only glimpses in my memory. But then even in those dreams, you were with him, I suppose. That happy feeling was his feelings, it was never mine, to begin with. All this time I was dreaming of someone else’s memories.” Tears stream down her face as she takes in the look in his eyes, the same look he used to give her.
This Ben would never be her Ben. He was already gone from her world. Leaving nothing but the memories that remain in her heart. Nothing but the feeling that she would always feel till the moment she passed. Meeting this Ben had brought heavy feelings to her heart. Makes her yearn to see a glimpse of him in his eyes. And when she found what she was looking for, hurt was all she found. “I’m sorry, Ben.”
He smiled bitterly. “Out of everyone, I thought you hated me the most.” He said. Recalling her avoiding him at all cost during their first interactions when the Umbrella first comes back to the timeline. The look in her eyes when she first laid her gaze on him was one that he will not forget.
She looked at him with sadness in her eyes. “That is an ability that I am not capable of. I cannot afford that. I don’t think I could even if I tried. You’re too much like him. Any version of you they all-well, I’ve only met two of you but you’re much more alike than I thought you do. Your feelings. The way both of you feel, I found it beautiful.”
A comfortable silence engulfed both of them as the two leaned back to the window frame simultaneously. The world is still falling around them. Slowly fading away from reality. Most people are already gone, reuniting with their loved ones on the other side.
“You were right.” His voice makes her look back at him. He offered the palm of his hand to her, so she made up a scissor using her point and middle finger. “I won.” She said with a large smile on her face.
Ben rolled his eyes. “You’re so childish. I couldn’t see why he loved you so much.” He said, clearly lying.
She crossed her arms. “Oh, the alcohol finally worn out? I was enjoying the non-asshole you.”
“Oh shut up.” He hushed her.
“What was I right about?” She waited for his response.
He met her eyes once more. She could tell that he was hesitant about it. “With the world ending, there’s nothing anyone wants more than spending time with their loved ones. Any kind of love.” Her eyes stayed locked with him as she reached for his palm once more, a warm smile on her face.
“Any kind of love.” She replied back.
click for an edit here
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new story concept
taglist! @glxssyhexrts @isimpforeveryone @pinkcherrytea @ray-of-sunrise @lodeddiperrodrick @ttaeh @birbtweettweet @gordona424 @wyrd01366 @pro-serpine @bryannabarradas @justaproudslytherpuff @tasmtrilogy @ac-book-nerd-13 @nao-cchi @jasmines-greentea @s1xthirty @corallyink @frxnchxfrxes @sunnsettee @avengersmarauders @glitter-and-gills @ladyofhellhounds @missbeverlyhills @nellie-mars @middle-child-syndrome701 @ttynatmyo @neotechclub @rogerslaufeysonn @divinekokomis @thebloodrobin @hiraeth-maximoff @maizieval @angel0signal @joyfullyswimmingface @kim-an-44 @morecthh @grievingghost @enviousofyoualways @iodinexo @bumbelbeeesblog @r0zu0 @iamyourgender @junsfilter @cherrychaeryoung @ajdahak @bebyyyyyy @sstellari @prissyimagines
#ben hargreeves#ben hargreeves x reader#the umbrella academy#the umbrella academy x reader#ben hargreeves angst#ben hargreeves fluff#the sparrow academy#sparrow ben hargreeves x reader#sparrow ben hargreeves#ben hargreeves imagine#the umbrella academy imagine#angst#heartwarming#song inspired#glimpse of us#tua#joji#sparrow ben x reader
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Toji was playing with his girlfriend’s hair as he listened to her ranting about her day. She was sitting on his lap her head on his chest, her hands moving with the things she was saying. She suddenly stop, looking up at him « Are you still listening ? » she asks. Toji doesn’t answer, his smile leaving his face as he look into her eyes. He hated himself whenever he was thinking of you. Why does her eyes, the way she look up at him or even how excited she is to tell him about her day reminds him so much of you. But he couldn't help it. He was missing you. And somehow when he got back into a new relationship he knew he shouldn't have because he hasn't moved on. How could he? Everything felt so easy with you. He was the one ending things though, but for some reasons he was all the time catching himself thinking of you. "Toji?" ask his girlfriend "Are you okay?" she was looking at him with the same you used to. He nod and smile as she start to ramble again. Oh how he missed your smile, your voice. All the moment he spent with you. He was feeling the same way he was when he was with as he look into her eyes. Because deep down he wish it was in your eyes he was looking, and your lips he was kissing
#mel 🌻#this is inspired by the song of joji yes#bc that song breaks my heart#toji x reader#toji x ex!reader#toji imagine#toji angst#toji fluff#toji fushiguro#jjk x reader#jjk imagine#jujutsu kaisen headcanons#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen angst#jujutsu kaisen imagines
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MY SONGS…YOUR VOICE — joji x reader
IN WHICH y/n is cooking and starts to hum Window and joji starts melt.
TW:: Japanese is spoke,, translations provided , fem reader.
˖⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ݁ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀˖
⠀𝖲𝗍𝗈𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗌⠀𝘄𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗵⠀𝖺⠀𝗍𝗁𝗈𝗎𝗌𝖺𝗇𝖽⠀𝒍𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕⠀𝒚𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒔 ,
⠀⠀🗝⠀𝗈𝗋⠀𝖺𝗍⠀𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝘁⠀𝖾𝗇𝗈𝗎𝗀𝗁⠀𝗍𝗈⠀𝗳𝗶𝗹𝗹⠀𝗍𝗁𝖾⠀𝒔𝒑𝒂𝒄𝒆 !⠀
˖⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ݁ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀˖
As y/n rolled the makisu,, the sushi began to take shape as the birds twittered outside she began to absentmindedly hum her husbands song.
“I see nothing out the window, window~” y/n mused under her breath as she began to slice the sushi with the sharp knife,, as it hit against the board eventually placing the sushi on the slate platters.
“Nothing out the window” y/n sung as she lay the chopsticks down on the table she knew joji wouldn’t use them , most likely.
As joji walked out of the bedroom he heard slight singing and muttering he quickly recognised the song as one of his own, window from the In tongues (delux) album a small rose tint spread across his neck as he smiled.
Walking into the kitchen joji wrapped his arms around y/n’s waist as she smiled moving her head back to meet her husbands eyes ,, the eye bags she loved so much the honey eyes she could loose herself in for hours.
“Hi, Ningyō (doll)” joji whispered planting a kiss on her forehead as his eyes scanned over his wife’s face her smile,, her soft lips the grapefruit chapstick made them evermore soft.
“Afternoon Dārin (darling)” y/n smiled as she gestured to the kitchen table jojis eyes darting to it as he noticed the plethora of home cooked food he smiled.
“Y/n miller what did I say about overworking yourself?” Joji remarked as he sat down at the table next to his girlfriend planting a firm hand on her thigh.
“Believe me, George, it didn’t take long to make I’ve been doing it for years it doesn’t feel like too much anymore” y/n answered as she played some of the tuna rolls.
“Whatever you say, Shin'ainaru-kun e (my dear)” George’s laughed lightly as he picked up some of the salmon sashimi.
“Anyway love, how are max and Ian?” You asked as george sighed eventually finishing the sashimi
“They were busy today but I plan to see them soon!” He laughed as smiled widely as y/n planted a hand on his shoulder as a knock rang through the apartment George perked his head to the side as y/n stood up
“Hold on I’ll get it hanii (honey)” y/n sped to the door watching as a very excited max and Ian waited at the door y/n planted a finger over her lips ushering them in
“Ian? Max?” Joji asked as he sprung from his seat speeding to the two men engulfing them in a group hug they both smiled.
“I thought you guys where busy??” Joji questioned as they all sat at the table tucking into the food below them.
“We where on the plane here you silly cunt” max chuckled as he swallowed the sushi.
#joji x reader#joji#joji imagine#joji miller#maxmoefoe#idubbbz#fluff#domestic fluff#Japanese#sushi#fem reader
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Catch what falls
Brienne Tarth x FEM!Reader
TW: Alcohol use, cussing, knives/sharp objects, the gays😱, scars, mention of battle/war, W rizz
(Hellur, I would like to say, that when I add songs to a story, don't play it right away! I'll add little notes that tell you when the song will best fit!)
You stood in front of the target, throwing your polished, black knives at the round board. Thoughts clouded your mind. Yesterday, at the break of dawn, you and other warriors in your camp were called to the bonfire to introduce a current traveler. It was a lone knight for Tarth. You never found interest in newcomers, considering your lack of social skills. You weren't awkward, just simply never got along with anyone.
But this one, with very little doubt, caught your eye. Obviously, in order to catch your eye, they had to be different in some sort of way. In this situation, unlike other knights, they were a woman. It was odd, considering you were the only female warrior in your camp.
"This is ser Brienne of Tarth, welcome this knight with utmost humble respect." The leader, Mijak, stated. You crossed your arms and huffed, earning a few disappointed glances. You looked the woman up and down, taking in her details. The short, messy, blonde hair. The piercing blue eyes and the scar on her top lip.
As you studied her form, you gazed upon her armor. It's dark, irony color, the way she looks uncomfortable in it, but tolerates it. Then your eyes wandered to her sheathed sword, you cringed, realizing that it probably had a cringe ass name like, "slayer" or "heart stabber". You never understood knights with how they named their sword cringe names. Why not keep it casual?
It became obvious that you were staring at her for a bit too long, as people began to retreat to their posts and activities. You probably seemed a bit threatening with your resting bitch face. You looked at her eyes, when you did, she stared right back at you.
You raised an eyebrow and grinned. Usually people avoid your eye contact, but she didn't. Her brows furrowed and you rolled your eyes, turning as you did. You went back to training, first gathering your already thrown knives from the wood. The knives came out roughly with how hard you throw them. As you turned to walk back to your stance placement, you noticed her in the little makeshift tavern with a mug of rum; watching you with visible interest.
You groaned, '𝑆ℎ𝑒 𝑏𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑏𝑒 𝑙𝑖𝑘𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑠𝑒 𝑛𝑜-𝑔𝑜𝑜𝑑 𝑚𝑎𝑙𝑒 𝑘𝑛𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡𝑠. 𝑇ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑟 𝑠𝑡𝑢𝑝𝑖𝑑 𝑓𝑢𝑐𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑒𝑔𝑜.' You muttered in your head and turned your back to her. She was obviously going to get on your nerves. While focusing on the target, you could feel her eyes on you. Pushing it out of your mind, you threw the black knife. It hit outside the bullseye. That's never happened before.
You stared at it with confusion and frustration. You snapped your head towards the blonde who had a smirk on her lips. You threw the knives down and stomped towards her. Your hands snatched the collar of her armor and pulled her towards you.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?!" A man yelled and you looked at him. "Mind your own business, Lou." You snapped back and then looked back at the blonde. You gazed into her eyes with a snarl on your lips. Her eyes flickered. "And you! Why the hell do you keep staring at me?! Keep your damned ego to yourself, I don't like it! You fucked up my aim with your horrendously blue eyes!" You growled and pushed her back as you let go of her collar.
You went to storm off but paused. You groaned and waved the bartender down to order a mug of rum. While taking the glass, you sat down on a rough stool, making sure to keep your distance from the blonde.
"Newcomer pissing you off, huh?" You sighed and looked at your partner, Miguel. Miguel and you became good friends a while back. You both met at a tavern in a ghost-like town. You've both been close friends ever since. "Yeah, we both know how I am with knights." You placed the glass to your lips and took a swig. Miguel chuckled and leaned on the wooden bar.
"She'll be gone soon, in about a week." You almost choked on your drink and beat your chest. "A week?! I won't fucking last!" You placed the mug on the bar harshly. He laughed again and patted your back. "Just try to talk to her, she's the only other female fighter you've ever met so far." He spoke in his rich but scratchy voice.
He was right though, she was the only other female warrior you've came in contact with. You sighed in defeat. "Fine. I'll try, but if shit goes south I blame you." He nodded and took a sip from his rum. "I expect nothing less, viper" he smiled and looked at his little group of people with a wink.
You glanced over at the blonde and sighed. While gulping down the last of your rum, she looked over at you and made eye contact with her. You placed down the glass and stood up from the stool.
Your feet carried you towards her until you were in front of her. You sighed again and bowed. "I'd like to apologize for my behavior earlier." She smiled and nodded. You leaned back up and smiled awkwardly. You weren't used to apologizing. "Would you... Like to walk? Maybe get to know each other?" You suggested.
She could see your hesitation, something about it made her feel odd. Her smile faded but quickly came back. "I would enjoy that" she spoke calmly. The blonde stood from the stool and looked at you as you looked straight ahead. She studied your face, like you had studied hers.
She noticed your little battle scars, the ones on your cheeks, nose, around your eyes, they looked beautifully imperfect. Your eyes and how they glowed in the bright sun. How your hair matched your personality. But she also noticed a little embarrassment on your cheeks, they were slightly rosey.
Meanwhile, you were instantly dying with how she looked at you. You tried to stay focused on the trail, but hopelessly failed. "The guy in the tavern, is he your partner? Romantically— I mean-" she asked and looked at the little trail with acorns and leaves, along with some twigs and pebbles.
You immediately cringed, silently gagging, but it being visual. She noticed and faught back a laugh. "Absolutely not! With how long I've been surrounded by men, I've found them to be disgusting." You paused in your words, then realized the stupidity. You both were warriors, basically did that of what a man does.
"What I mean is— with how surrounded I am with men, I've lost interest in them. I guess I go for the opposite of what I always see, I suppose." You internally groan, are you stupid or what? You just admitted to a stranger that you're into women.
She just admired you, you could feel it. You looked at her and smiled. Immediately you looked away. "Horrendously blue eyes, huh?" She chuckled, referring to what you said to her only minutes ago. You slapped your forehead and groaned. She found amusement in your actions.
"Yeah, sorry about what I said. I'm not used to having my attention being taken from my target practice. Seems like you interested me." Another internal slap to the head. You fucking idiot. What's up with you?
She smiled and took a glimpse at you again. Your face seemed to be getting redder by the second. "Interested you?" She questioned grazed over your features. The sound of the camp growing quieter as you both walked. "What I mean is— well— fucking hell, what I meant was that, you're the only woman warrior I've seen— or met, ever." You looked at her and caught her eyes. You smiled awkwardly again.
You made it to a little river and you took off your boots. "What are you doing?" She asked and tilted her head slightly. You placed your boots on a nice rock and walked skillfully along the rigidity stones. "I'm getting in the water. And please, you can call me Viper. It's just a nickname."
(Play the song! I repeat! Play the song! This is not a drill, people!)
She watched as you stepped into the water, you looked silly, but graceful. It was slightly cold at first, and the rocks were slick. But you managed. "How old are you, Viper?" She asked as she watched you with curiosity. You sit on a big stone and kept your feet in. "I'm twenty-nine," You answered and then looked at her, "How about you? How many loops have you gone around the sun?"
She furrowed her brows but smiled at how you phrased it. It didn't make her feel uncomfortable, it made her feel more proud. "Thirty-two" She looked over at you and her smile softened. You felt something in that moment.
Something took control of you, unable to maintain your vocal cords. "You're beautiful." Immediately her smile faded. She looked more hurt. "I didn't know the joke got around so fast..." She spoke quietly. '𝐽𝑜𝑘𝑒?' You silently questioned.
"Brienne, there is no joke. Not one that I'm aware of." You furrowed your eyebrows. A joke, by calling her beautiful? You wanted to know, but didn't want to hurt her more.
Her heart did a loop, she was confused, charmed, unsure, but also felt something she couldn't place her finger on. Surely you were joking, but she didn't think that. "Well... Thank you, Viper... You're beautiful as well." She smiled and watched as you went to take a step. Something in her told her to go to you, so she did.
She took two steps towards you and you slipped on a rock. The surprise earned a gasp from you and you tightly shut your eyes. You waited and braced yourself for the hard rocks beneath you, but you never came in contact with them. You peeked out and noticed Brienne looking down at you with worried eyes.
"Are you alright?" She asked. She earned no response, just a tranced you in her arms. She tilted her head closer and spoke again, just in case if you didn't hear her because of the surprise or the running water.
"Viper, are you alri—" she was cut off by your lips on hers. Your eyes closed, but hers remained wide. She wasn't expecting it. Nor has she ever experienced it. Slowly her eyes closed and she leaned into the kiss, but then paused for a little air. You smiled and so did she, looking into one another's eyes. "I suppose that's a yes...?" She chuckled and set you back on your feet. You, only now realizing what you did, blushed like crazy. What made it worse is that she kissed back, and enjoyed it.
"Yes— Thank you... For catching me." You smiled and rubbed the back of your neck. She leaned in and kissed you gently.
It felt right to you, and felt perfect for her.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
How did we feel about the first story? Was it too little, too much? Please give some feedback or suggestions to help out a bit!
☜♡☞
#fanfic#gwendoline christie#lady brienne#sword knight#lady knight#lesbians#gorgeous women#lady warrior#battle#war#brienne of tarth#house tarth#fluff#gwendolineuniverse#first fanfic#welcome to the internet#glimpse of us#joji music#Vexed Writer#enjoy xoxo#Spotify
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A glimpse of us by joji but it’s Draken and y/n; where he sees him and Emma and what they could’ve been but instead of this getting too angsty he decides to move on and actually BE with y/n.
A glimpse of us but it’s also Ken watching him and y/n’s teenage daughter go out with her delinquent boyfriend and Ken just looks at y/n saying “I never imagined seeing a glimpse of us in front of my eyes.”
~lmk if I should post more like this~
#breezy writes 📜#anime#ken ryuguji x reader#ryuuguji ken#tokyo revengers x reader#tokyo revengers angst#Tokyo revengers x reader fluff#self indulgent Drabble#joji music#joji lyrics
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angsty fight between miguel and wife!reader
and then they make up yayayayay
Give Me Reasons We Should Be Complete
✿ฺ Paring ➳❥ Miguel O’Hara x F!Reader
✿ฺ Summary ➳❥ Miguel has been pushing you away for some time now. After a talk with a friend, you and Miguel try to sort things out.
✿ฺ (A/n) ➳❥ Inspired by “DANCING IN THE DARK” by Joji. Writing this made me think back on past crushes/lovers. But thank you for your request! I am also holding back on writing smut because it keeps getting labeled and it takes me longer to write.
✿ฺ Word Count ➳❥ 1.4k
✿ฺ Content Warnings ➳❥ Female reader, angst-to-fluff, swearing, Miguel is kinda a dick head, mentions of sleep deprivation…
Want more Miguel content? Check out my MASTERLIST!
You stood in his cold and dark office. The best source of light was his laptop but his huge frame blocked most of the light. You managed around the crumbled paper and thrown desk objects with a plate in hand.
“Miguel?” You peer over his shoulder, “I made you dinner.”
He nods.
“You know you haven’t eaten since yesterday.”
He nods again.
“And you know that you’ve been here for a long time. I think it’s best for you to-”
“Take a break?” Miguel interrupts you, “I don’t have time for that.”
“Miguel, I’m sure whatever it is, it can wait a few minutes. All I’m asking is for you to eat something.” You try to set the plate down.
“I thought I made it clear that I do not want to be bothered. You’re distracting me. Leave.”
He didn’t mean it like that… He didn’t mean it like that. He didn’t mean it like that. He didn’t mean it like that…
“But Mig-”
“I said go.” He growls, his eyes turning its blood red from anger, “You’re becoming a nuisance.”
He didn’t mean it like that.
“Okay.” You tried not to let the crack in your voice show. You didn’t even bother to leave the plate behind because you knew it was going to be wasted.
“And don’t bother me again.” You heard him say as you left his office.
You took deep breaths, trying to calm yourself down before you burst into tears. But your hands shook, nearly dropping the plate.
You choked down your sobs and let your tears fall, the plate was left in the fridge, and you pushed yourself to your bedroom. It was basically yours now since Miguel was sleeping in his office.
The sheets no longer lingered on his cologne and any sign of his presence was gone, other than his clothing and a few photos. The room has become a mess of discarded clothing, old plates and cups, and candy wrappers.
How long has it been since Miguel showed affection? Or even looked at you?
This was normal behavior for Miguel, right? You should know, you’re married to him. You’re his wife. But he experienced loss, unlike you. You didn’t want to judge him for how he deals with his emotions, he’s emotionally distant. You knew that from the start.
And because of this, you felt like he deserved more than what you could give him. It’s what kept you going through the many times Miguel tore your heart, how it squeezed in pain at his actions and words. How you look the other way and ignore his hurtful words.
You couldn’t sleep. You left the still cold bed and dressed in something warm and headed up to the roof.
You sat on the edge, looking at Nueva York. How beautiful it looked during the night, which is one of the reasons why you liked sitting up here.
“Sitting all by yourself?” You tense up only to relax when you know that voice, “At this time? All alone?” Peter B. lands next to you, his daughter in his arms.
“I would ask my husband to join me but he’s too busy.” You respond truthfully.
“Again? He’s been at this all week.” He sits next to you.
“Yeah.” You huff.
“And… how are you holding up?”
“I’m fine.”
“Really? Because it doesn’t look like it.” He offers Mayday who reaches out to you.
You take her and set her down on your lap, “I just don’t know what to do, everything I do seems to bother Miguel. Checking up on him, bringing him food. It feels like he’s doing this on purpose.”
“Miguel’s always been difficult and from the time I spent with him… He’s different, not like the rest of us. He’s accepted his fate as Spider-Man and believes he’s destined for bad things 24/7. But good things do come along, like you. I think… I think he’s trying to come to terms that he can get it because he deserves it.”
Mayday coos, pulling at your hair, “And I think Miguel is scared. He puts on his tough act because he has to, yet he’s afraid to admit he’s scared. Normally, people would’ve given up on him. Why haven’t you?
“Till death do us part. I don’t want to lose him. I don’t give up on him because when you love someone, you love them every single day as who they are.”
“Talk about romantic.”
“Oh please.” You look down at Mayday, “Plus I think-”
“There you are.” You jump and this time, you remain tense, “I was looking for you.”
“Now you’re looking for me?” You respond, refusing to turn your head.
“It’s late, (Y/n). It’s dangerous.”
“I’m here, she’s alright.” Mayday jumps into her father’s arms.
“I’ve already had enough of you. Please, (Y/n).”
“It’s fine.” You tell him, following Miguel inside.
You head to the bedroom, “Where are you going?”
“Bed.”
“(Y/n)-”
“I’m tired and I do not want to be bothered. That includes you too, Miguel.”
“Excuse me?” He follows you into the bedroom.
“You heard me.”
“Please, (Y/n), talk to me.” Miguel begs.
“I’m sorry, did you just say talk? Like I have been trying to do for the past week?”
“(Y/n)-”
“You know what? No, no. You do not get to try to get me to talk after all of this. I have been trying, I have been all in. All I asked of you was to look after yourself.”
“I know.”
“You know? You KNOW?” You scoff rather loudly, “Did you know that Lyla has even talked to me about your behavior? I’m worried about you Miguel. All the damn time, even more when I see you not eating and staying up all night. All I ask is one minute, one bite of the damn food.”
“I’m… I’m so sorry.”
“Is sorry all you have to say? Not even a half assed excuse?” You see Miguel trying to form a sentence but nothing leaves his left and his head hangs low, “I need to be alone.”
You walk past him but he grabs your arm, “Please don’t leave.” He says, “Please don’t walk out that door.”
“I’m sleeping on the couch, you could have the bed.” You look up at him.
“I love you, (Y/n). I know I don’t say it as much but I fucking love you. He’s right, you know. I am scared. Scared of everything. Because at first, I didn’t think I could have that, have you. You let me hurt you and that is unforgivable.”
He’s crying. Looking right at you, letting himself be bare right in front of you. His grip on your arm loosens and his hands come up to your face, cupping your cheeks. You could hear his staggered breathing, trying to keep himself composed.
“But I wasn’t lying when I said I love you, I wasn’t lying when I said I wanted a family, and I wasn’t lying when I said that you make me believe in love.”
“I’m always here for you, Miguel. You don’t have to go through things alone, but when you want to, I’m here.” You take one of his hands into yours, pulling it away from your face but keeping a tight hold on it.
“It’s not that easy. I hurt you, I understand why you don’t want to.”
“I love you, Miguel. We’ll work on this. I promise you.” After a moment, Miguel practically tackles you, nearly falling to the ground. The hug is tight and warm, and you could feel your shirt become wet with Miguel’s tears.
“You’re okay, right?” His voice cracks as he speaks through his sobs, “Please tell me you’re okay.”
“I promise you, I am okay.” You whisper.
“I’ll make it up to you, I swear.”
“You can start by getting some rest. But you’ve got a lot of apologies O’Hara.”
You don’t know how long you and Miguel stayed like this, nor did you care. All you cared about was Miguel and he felt complete at last.
© 2023 Intoxicated-Chan, I do not allow my work to be copied, translated, modified, adapted, or put on any other platform with permission.
#x reader#x female reader#fluff#angst#miguel o'hara x reader#miguel o’hara x reader#miguel o'hara#miguel o’hara#spider man x reader#spiderman 2099 x reader#spiderman x you#spiderman 2099#spiderman x y/n#spider man across the spider verse#spider man 2099#spiderverse#spider man x y/n#spider man x you#spiderman x reader
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enhypen sleeping positions with s/o ₊˚⊹ᡣ𐭩
fluff , soft : idol au : clingy bf
rq for any kpop groups 🤍
masterlist
a/n: after the new en'oclock ep of them all sleeping made me giggle and get to work instead of starting my new series 😭 and this was made at 1am and continued at 8am so im so sorry if its poo poo
heeseung | 희승
the spooner
heeseung is the type to be the bigger spoon in the relationship but sometimes the smaller one for some occasions. he'll definitely have you curled up in-front of him and play with your hair until you drift off. sometimes sings to you softly if you're having a hard time going to sleep or just for comfort. probably snores a bit but the soft snores where its like breathing and not annoying obviously. during the night you guys probably end up in weird positions but still somehow touching each other in some way like; hands holding, legs intertwined, or even just on top of each other at this point. if you guys weren't spooning he'll have a leg possibly out of the covers or up.
"babe stop moving.." heeseung whispered trying to make you stop squirming around while trying to watch whatever you were watching before you guys would sleep. "im uncomfy hee the sheets are literally choking my throat" you barked back while marry my husband intro is playing in the background. "okay okay sorry just calm down and watch this episode alright?" he comforted while playing with bits of your hair in the spooning position. you quickly apologised while regaining your attention to the show which heeseung was also into. feeling his breathe down your bare neck gave you shivers while his jo malone cologne that hadnt washed off could be noticed. he kissed your neck as 'im going to sleep now' which made you quickly turn off your phone and throw it down beside the bed on a pillow. you snuggled back onto him and grab is hands to hug you for comfort which made him smile and dig his face into your messed up hair which smelt of vanilla shampoo.
READ MORE UNDER THE CUT !!
jay | 제이
sweetheart cradle
jay is the type of guy to hug you but HOLD YOUR HAND LIKE INTERTWINE YOUR HAND WITH HIS WHILE YOU SLEEP!!??! i think its more comforting to him because he knows you're there and that you wont leave him. he probably lets you sleep half on his bed and half off but i think most of the time he'll let you sleep fully on top of him but for the sake of this its half / half. i damn right know jay will probably wrap you up like a burrito with blankets so that you dont leave a cold spot for him to wake up to. i think your legs would be intertwined if you both were cold but most of the time its just a head on the chest and arms wrapped around with hands intertwined.
"are you satisfied with how we are positioned love?" jay called out in the middle of the dark with only the city lights shining through through the cracks of the curtains. you nodded and snuggled into his side and took a big deep breath before wrapping your legs with his. he kissed the top of your head while brushing your hair so you could fall asleep first before him. he only did this to know you were sleeping well and not awake staring at the roof. "give me reasons we should complete.... you should be with him, i cant compete" jay softly singed from the song 'slow dancing in the dark' by joji. slightly humming before noticing your out asleep softly breathing with little snores breaking through making him chuckle and closing his eyes to join you.
jake | 심재윤
head on chest
jake is the guy to have an arm behind his head and one around your waist like side hugging you. you on the other hand would be next to him with your head on his chest. he would definitely be caressing your open skin or under your shirt (GOOD INTENTIONS ONLY FLUFF RAHHHH) rubbing your hip with his thumb. sometimes he'll pull you on top of him to get more hugs when he needs them but more of the time you guys are just a head on the chest and thats all. I feel like jake would do a uno reverse and place his head in your boobs and really enjoy it. he'll be in heaven if you play with his hair and be situated in between your boobs.
"babbbyyyyy can i lay on your boobs please :(" jake hovered over your body on the bed pleading for mercy. "no im on my period my boobs are sensitive.. just wait one more day" you answered while looking at him and poking him on the hip, stomach, face. he pouted and looked like someone stole all his legos from him. he settled next to you while pretending to be upset while huffing and sighing a lot so you can get the memo which you did but just silently laughed at. "jake. stop huffing you can lay on them just dont do anything bad" when he heard the first few words he jumped and placed himself on top of you which caused you to wheeze. "thanks baby love you" he smiled while nestling and rubbing your skin causing you to softly find yourself going to sleep which jake did shortly after.
sunghoon | 박성훈
front to front / intertwined
I feel like sunghoon would be so used to having his head under the covers from being in a dorm with ni-ki and his little pranks. he’s the type to just squeeze softly bits of your skin while laying with him in bed. I think during throughout the night sunghoon would just causally move his arm behind your head while you hug him like a koala. both of you are very clingy while sleeping but it makes you both sleep well and have a good night. just like jay and heeseung he’ll probably sing to you so you can sleep. definitely a bit of a tease and annoying you before you sleep but it’s the memories that matter. he’s also the type of guys just to randomly get up in the middle of the night and grab something small to snack on and go back to bed so don’t be surprised if he disappears. you guys are better at sleeping during a move than just laying and staring at the ceiling so that’s why you both said to watch movies during the day.
“sunghoon!! stop tickling me” you laughed loudly and tried to swat away his hands from touching your ticklish spots. he just looks at you loving and smiles and proceeds to tickle the hell out of you. as the tickling continues for another good thirty seconds before stopping and sunghoon laying on his side facing you. softly moving a piece of your hair to the side tucking it behind your ear then proceeding to kiss your forehead. he smiles while hugging you while pecking your neck heaps then moving to your shoulder before finishing. He moves up and lays his head on yours and stroking your hair to make you fall asleep in his arms. “love you hoonie” you said while tangling your fingers with his free hand. he smiles and kiss the top of your head and closing his eyes. “love you too bubs” before drifting off to sleep.
sunoo | 선우
full body on body
sunoo is a guy who would NOT move during his sleep so your the only one moving around heaps. you'll be situated laying on top of him while he has a hand touching your butt (😱🫢) JKKJKJKJKJK he'll just have it resting wherever so it might land there sometimes 😉. you guys would defiently watch ghibli studio before going to sleep or even those tiktok part one to like part 49329 of a reddit story. but i have a feeling you both would just just pass out asleep as soon as you both lay down. you would play with the strands of his poor damaged hair but its okay because its soft either way 😍. theres really nothing else because i generally think you both would just sync sleep ...
"am i the asshole for not giving my baby to my sister?" could be heard off your phone while both of you are silently watching the 5th part of the reddit story. you both left out a gasp everytime something happened but it had finally come to an end which caused you to turn off your phone and snuggle into your boyfriend. you played with the strands of his hair whilst he played with the his shirt that your wearing that was a little too big for you. "sometimes i wonder if i could write up a shit story and get it placed by tiktok and be famous asf" you said out of the blue which made him halt and giggle at your words. "probably could if you wanted" he said while both of you thinking on what you would write about. "oooh i have one, what about 'my sister turned into a furry and tried to kill my kids'" sunoo just started giggling at your title for a reddit story. "well we can talk about this in the morning because i want to sleep >:(" sunoo said before pulling the covers up so it could reach your neck. you both snuggled and fell asleep to dream about eachother wink wonk
jungwon | 정원
body on body / head on shoulder
jungwon would be a sleeper who would just move heaps but you know was great! you both are so waking up would make you both giggle at. sometimes one of you would be off the bed or almost falling off while the other is a starfish. starting the sleep off you would be on top of jungwon while he's hugging you from below. but as the night unfolds its literally everything at once. you guys once mentioned to record from your ceiling to see whos pushing each other off the bed but ends up to be Maeum sleeping in the middle of you both having basically the whole middle of the bed. I also have a feeling that you guys sync sleep so it doesnt matter if one of you were awake later than the other you both are just so used to having each other in bed.
"wonnn make sure theres pillows next to the bed because if one of us fall off the bed we are gonna be in a grump" you stated while sitting on the bed with maeum petting the small petite dog. you laid back while the big bright lights were still on due to jungwon placing the softer pillows on your side while he said the harder ones and one of your teddies that maeum didnt end up half eating. jungwon was finally done and turned off the massive bright lights then settling into bed with both you and maeum. who eventually made his way to the bottom of the bed keeping guard. you laid on top of jungwon while he hugged you like a burrito. "i'll see you on the other side of the bed tomorrow". you stated while snuggling in between his neck and shoulders. "nighty night..!! love you" jungwon stated before falling into a deep sleep.
ni-ki | 니키
body on body / spooning / face to face
ni-ki was a menace and was definitely one before bed as well. he's teasing you but you have bisco to go basically attack ni-ki in the process. but while laying in bed bisco would go off to his little bed on your side of the bed which bisco moved whenever ni-ki placed it in the corner of the room. ni-ki would be the type to have you in different spots but mainly ontop of him so he gets to rub your back and let his hands roam on your back and your hair. sometimes spooning or face to face when you both can't be bothered moving. you guys would definitely send snap videos to the enhypen groupchat of each others 0.5's which you would occasionally get from everyone back. sometimes ni-ki and you would be cheeky and do weverse lives in your bed trying new international foods you would find. normally staff would have to force it off but they gave up and let it only happen every friday night. but either way you guys would sleep as well synced due to all the heavy schedules you have
"bisco go bite his leg" you whispered to the dog who was currently in your arms while you rest against the wall. bisco jumps up and runs to ni-ki to bite his leg and run back to you. ni-ki side eyes the dog before jumping into bed with only the galaxy projector as the only light in the room. while bisco and ni-ki have a side eye comp you brought out one snack which was from Australia which was the tim tam (GUYS AS A FELLOW AUSTRALIAN THESE THINGS ARE THE BOMB) ni-ki started the weverse live which you both enjoyed thirty minutes of trying them while jake was happy that you guys enjoyed them. after the weverse live you both snuggled into each other for warmth as the lights of the city glazed through and the projector up on the ceiling. you both softly fell into a deep slumber while bisco sleep near you instead of ni-ki due to their ongoing beef with each other.
#enhypen x reader#enhypen#masterlist#x reader#kpop#enhypen riki#niki x reader#riki nishimura x reader#kpop x reader#enhypen niki#lee heeseung enhypen#lee heeseung x reader#jay enhypen#jay x reader#sunghoon enhypen#sunghoon x reader#jake enhypen#jake sim x reader#jungwon enhypen#jungwon x reader#enhypen sunoo#sunoo x reader#₊˚⊹ᡣ𐭩 avas works
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JJH fic recs
been getting a little hard trying to find long fics to read these days but here are some that i complied in the last month or so :)
(🫀) -personal faves
all these years @domjaehyun
WC: 34.1k
fluff, smut, angst; childhood friends-to-lovers!au, college!au, neighbors!au
Just friends @lonelyharmonies
WC: 22k
Strangers-to-friends- to-lovers!au , college au
what happens when you wake up in someone else’s bed after getting drunk in a party?
(🫀) Only @ppangjae
WC: 21.6k
almost!lovers au
You like to believe crossing paths with Jaehyun after graduation is just pure coincidence. He always comes and goes. But what if he decides to stay? To stick around? To give what was an ‘almost’ a chance?
Romeo roulette @wincore
WC:21.1k
soulmate au, office au, fake dating
if finding your soulmate is the same as a damn game of Russian roulette, you are determined to not pull the trigger at all. except, you know who your soulmate is and he doesn’t—and given a choice to pretend, you find that jaehyun is the lesser of the two burdens to bear.
he fell first and he fell harder @taurusdaylight
WC: 18.7k
Basketball captain!jaehyun, childhood-friends-to-lovers
jeong jaehyun really loves basketball. but also, he’s terribly in love with his childhood best friend of seventeen years, you.
(🫀) all i wanted @yutaholic
WC: 17k
heartbreakers, smut
A year has passed since you last saw your best friend, Jaehyun, but the man who returns is not the boy you once knew and loved. Jaehyun will barely speak to you and you don’t know why, but you both may be exactly what the other needs to mend your broken hearts.
(🫀)The Apple of My Eye @sehunniepotwrites
WC: 17k
school! au , teacher!au , Kindergarten teacher!jaehyun
As a young and handsome kindergarten teacher of two years, Jeong Jaehyun was used to receiving presents during Teacher’s Appreciation Week. This, however, was the first year Jaehyun wanted to give a present of appreciation to someone else—his new and ever-so-lovable teacher’s assistant.
(🫀)song for a little sparrow @ppangjae
WC:13.7k
poet!jaehyun x painter!reader , strangers-to-lovers
As a burnt out painter, you packed one suitcase and flew a one-way trip to Paris in hopes of finding your passion again. In the city of love, the last thing you expected was to bump into a man who doesn’t believe in love. But you do, and you find yourself showing him the wonders of love and falling in love. Just don’t fall in love with him.
I like me better (when i’m with you) @tyonfs
WC:11.8k
friends to enemies to lovers, sports au , smut
there was no one else on the planet that made your blood boil like jeong jaehyun did. you never thought your feelings toward him were anything past pure hatred, but when you were lost in the feeling of his lips on yours and his hands on your body, you couldn’t help but think that maybe a part of you didn’t completely hate his guts.
Someone to Bring Home @rouiyan
WC: 10.2k
Med student!jaehyun, College au, Brothers best friend , home for thanksgiving
synopsis — “if you’ve been waiting for fallin’ in love, babe, you don’t have to wait on me.” (sanctuary - joji)
Boyfriend material @mochidoie
WC: 6.2k
fake dating au, strangers-to-lovers , slight angst
Although you and Jaehyun had never spoken a word to each other before this class project, he asks you to be in a fake relationship in order to prove to his longtime crush that he is boyfriend material.
Back up Valentine @tyonfs
WC: 2.9k
Spiderman!jaehyun
you don’t have any unrealistic expectations for valentine’s day considering your love life has never flourished, but the least your best friend could’ve done was not summon an intergalactic army of an alien species during your first blind date ever.
SERIES
S.C.S; ayakashi @starlightkun
WC:66.2k
heavily based off yet another otome game, ayakashi: romance reborn ; bc of this, all the lore used in here is inspired by/based on/taken from the lore of the game, not the actual lore of traditional ayakashi/yokai stories
#nct 127 jaehyun#jaehyun nct#jaehyun#jaehyun layouts#jaehyun imagines#nct jaehyun#jeong jaehyun#jaehyun smut#jaehyun au#jaehyun fluff#nct 127 au#nct fluff#nct au#nct imagines#nct u#nct smut#nct 127#nct#nct x reader#jung yoonoh#jung jaehyun
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golden boy
❝ c’mon, this is exactly like the bahamas if you close your eyes. ❞
PAIRING ▸ lee heeseung x fem!reader
GENRES ▸ fluff, crack, best friends to lovers, summer romance au, rich kid au
WARNINGS ▸ profanity, underage drinking, heeseung is the biggest simp ever, and he calls you princess, mc has a stepdad, she is also a little spoiled in the beginning, tooth rotting fluff (like might be the fluffiest thing i’ve written), mutual pining ofc because this is a jayflrt fic, friends being insufferable (mainly 02z)
SUMMARY ▸ in the summer between high school and college, lee heeseung is determined to make you fall in love with the city of los angeles after your vacation plans in the bahamas fall through. somewhere between the lines, though, you end up falling for your childhood best friend.
WORD COUNT ▸ 16,375 words
PLAYLIST ▸ youth by troye sivan • tongue tied by grouplove • ribs by lorde • sanctuary by joji • cruel summer by taylor swift • stars by duncan laurence
AUTHOR’S NOTE ▸ i have been waiting AGES to share this one so i hope u guys like it !! ♡ also pls play stars by duncan laurence during the observatory scene if you’d like :’)
IT WAS THE FIRST DAY OF SUMMER VACATION WHEN YOU RECEIVED THE GOD-AWFUL NEWS.
“Your father and I are finally gonna have our honeymoon this summer!” your mother exclaimed, grinning excitedly as if she was expecting you to reciprocate the same energy.
Okay, maybe it wasn’t god-awful, but this was the one summer where you didn’t have to shoulder the responsibilities of being a student. Having recently graduated from high school, you were basking in the glow of finally becoming an adult and an incoming college freshman. You were finally free from AP exams, college applications, and the pressure of balancing academics and a social life. So, given all that, you were rather upset that your parents were leaving you behind before you had to fall into the routine of being a student all over again.
You didn’t mind having this talk. In fact, you were glad your mother was telling you in advance instead of just jetting away to another country and leaving a note behind. However, you didn’t understand why she had to have this conversation in front of your best friend, Lee Heeseung.
It probably didn’t help that you two had been joined at the hip since you were wearing diapers, but your families had gotten far too comfortable with each other. Just last week, Heeseung’s mom was asking you if you both had finally “tied the knot,” to which you replied by explaining that you had just graduated high school.
You were happy for your mother and stepfather, really. Your mother had experienced her fair share of bad relationships after your father left, so you were glad that she finally met someone so kind and genuine. You weren’t ever one to judge the men your mother brought home, but your stepfather always got brownie points for playing Mario Kart with you whenever he came over. Not to mention, he bought you the Nintendo Switch to play it on. He seemed to be the only man who didn’t feel insecure about your mother’s success and lavish lifestyle, so you only had good things to say about him.
While you were genuinely glad with the outcome of your parents’ relationship, that unbecoming, spoiled side of you was slipping through the cracks. Even your brain was shouting at you for complaining about having to stay in Bel Air for the summer. Yet, you were just far too frustrated with the bleak vision of your own summer to care about your parent’s honeymoon. In two weeks, you should have been vacationing in the Bahamas with a piña colada in your hand, not waiting for your parents to come back from Rome.
“That sounds so fun,” you chirped with fake enthusiasm, although you supposed it was easily detected due to your gritted teeth, “and that’s not gonna interfere with our trip to the Bahamas, right?” When she didn’t respond, you asked again, “Right, Mom?”
Your mother wore an uneasy look on her face at the sight of your displeasure, so Heeseung cut in quickly, “I think you should probably forget about the Bahamas this year, Y/N.”
“Heeseung!” you whined, sending him a sharp glare. He did not just tell you to forget about the Bahamas. “You’re supposed to be on my side!”
“Not around your mom, dude,” he muttered.
“He’s right, Y/N.” Your mother smiled as she placed her hands on your shoulders. “I mean, it would be good for you to stay here with all of your friends for once; I don’t think you’ve ever not left the country for the summer.” When you sulked, your mother tried to encourage you by gently squeezing your shoulders. “Heeseung and your other friends are here, and you have a car now! Yeji’s family moved to Irvine now, didn’t they? You can drive down to see her.”
You nodded, a little more encouraged. You and Hwang Yeji had been close ever since you met at Choi Jisu’s birthday party in middle school. When Yeji’s parents decided to move to Irvine, finding that housing was much more expensive in Los Angeles County, you were absolutely crushed. Plus, it wasn’t like Orange County was any less expensive, so you felt even more bitter about their sudden move. It wasn’t like you could drive and see Yeji whenever you wanted, either; the one hour drive felt like three with all the Los Angeles traffic.
You hung your head, dejected. “I guess so.” You turned your head to the side, noticing the snicker that Heeseung was holding back. After shooting him a dirty look, you looked back at your mother. “When are you leaving?”
“This weekend,” she responded, eyes fixed on her phone screen now. “I have to sort out my PTO with my boss today, though.” She kissed the top of your head and started heading for the door, heels clicking against the linoleum flooring with each step. “I’ll see you later tonight, Y/N! And make sure Heeseung actually goes home tonight!”
You shot a glance at your friend, who didn’t seem to have a care in the world in reaction to your mother’s words.
Heeseung tended to be scared of everything—everything except actually scary things, like biblically accurate angels or the wrath of his mother.
You gave your best friend a condescending half-grin, which he returned sheepishly. As of late, Heeseung had become notorious for staying out late with Jay Park, Jake Sim, and Park Sunghoon. (Yang Jungwon often joined them, but he was adamant about going home before midnight. Something about not wanting to miss out on his beauty sleep.) Everyone thought this was the beginning of Heeseung’s teenage rebellion (which was rather delayed), but then you discovered that all they did was play games in an internet café and occasionally use their fake IDs to get into VIP lounges at clubs.
When you heard the door shut, you circled around the couch to sit next to Heeseung.
“This sucks,” you said flatly. “Summer means an ungodly rise in temperature—hot enough to melt the skin off my bones, and I’d rather have that happen while I’m sunbathing in the Bahamas!”
“Do you realize how spoiled you sound right now?” Heeseung snorted, looking up from his phone where he was playing Cookie Run from the umpteenth time. You swore he was addicted to the game despite the numerous times he told you he was just playing it as a joke. Your best friend continued, “You should be happy for your mom instead of complaining about your summer being ruined.”
You sank back in your seat. You hated to admit it, but Heeseung was right; you were being uptight about this whole situation. You just couldn’t help but feel disappointed about the one thing you were looking forward to all year long.
Heeseung leaned closer so that you both were shoulder-to-shoulder, and he nudged you. You looked over and were met with his dazzling grin. Frankly, you were honored that you were graced with his attention in the middle of his Cookie Run gaming session.
“You can spend the summer with me instead,” he offered.
You snorted. “That was gonna happen, anyway. You spend all your free time at my place.”
“Why wouldn’t I?” Heeseung asked, brows knitting into a frown.
He looked at you so intensely that your breath caught in your throat for a moment. The proximity coupled with the shift in tone made you feel self-conscious, and you were scared that Heeseung was going to let some unspoken feeling slip.
However, his face broke into a mischievous grin. “You guys have a jacuzzi.”
You pressed your lips into a thin line and shoved him harder. This time, Heeseung was laughing as he fell against one of the cushions on his side. You grabbed one of the throw pillows and started pummeling him with it.
“You have your own jacuzzi, too, dumbass,” you retorted. “You’d know if you actually stayed at your own house for once! Also, you’ve lost your pool privileges here after you poured bubble bath in ours.”
“Come on. It wasn’t that bad.”
“You clogged our jets and we had to pay someone to get rid of the bubbles, Heeseung.”
“Jake was the one who poured the bubble bath in!”
“And who was the one who gave him the idea?”
Heeseung grimaced, and you were seconds away from reminding him how you took the fall for him when your parents asked what happened to the hot tub. Before you could, though, he spoke up.
“I was being serious, though,” he started, “do you wanna have a fun summer with me, or do you wanna stay bitter and do nothing?”
Something about Heeseung’s condescending tone was pissing you off. You stared at him before delivering one last blow with the throw pillow.
“Ow! What was that for?!” he exclaimed, rubbing his arm. You rolled your eyes at his dramatics; you didn’t even hit him that hard.
“I’ll see you later,” you told him, turning on your heel to head upstairs without seeing your friend out. “I have plans with Yizhuo now.”
You weren’t exactly sure how you became friends with Ning Yizhuo, but throughout high school, everyone knew the two of you came in a package deal. When you were in third period AP World History, everyone knew that Yizhuo would switch out of her second period section to be in your class; when you didn’t show up to calculus, it was no surprise that it was because you were ditching with Yizhuo; when Zhong Chenle asked Yizhuo out, he realized that commitment came with becoming your friend as well.
At first, you assumed that it was because your mothers were close, but that didn’t explain why you spent countless nights at her place and picked her up for school every single morning. Heeseung even once admitted that he was jealous of your friendship with her. He was drunk when he mentioned that, of course. He would never admit to that while he was sober.
When she got into a school on the west coast and you got into a school on the east coast, though, you thought your life was over. (When you figured out your meet-up plans were somewhat manageable, you felt a little better.)
On the bright side, you were stoked to attend Yale with your partner-in-crime, Heeseung.
“Wait! Let me drive you,” said partner-in-crime offered.
You turned to face him, wide-eyed. “It’s like a thirty minute drive, Heeseung. I’m going to her country club.”
Despite your protests, you knew that Heeseung would be more than willing to drive all the way over there. Hell, you could tell him you wanted to go to Las Vegas right now, and he’d somehow manage to arrange a trip for you two. You had never met anyone as spontaneous as him.
Now, though, you were trying to get away from him because you were a little bitter about his comment. On the other hand, you really didn’t want to drive alone, so you kept his proposition on the table.
“Oh, her country club? The one up north, right?” he inquired. “Can I bring Jake, too? We’ll just hang out at the mall while you do your thing.”
You mulled it over—not for long, though, because you found yourself caving easily. “Fine.”
You forgot that Heeseung bringing Jake meant that Jay and Sunghoon were coming along for the ride, too.
The three of them were squeezed in the back of Heeseung’s Tesla, with Jay incessantly complaining about how he had to take the middle seat. He even went as far as to compare heights, and Sunghoon used his one centimeter on Jay to his advantage. Jake remained silent for once.
You ran your finger along the smooth leather of your seat and snorted.
“Are you making fun of my car?” Heeseung asked with a chuckle.
“No, I’m making fun of how you dropped extra money for white seats.”
“And for the seven-seater.”
“What?!” Jay exclaimed, swiveling in his seat to look behind him. “And you still squeezed me in the middle seat?”
“Not my fault you didn’t look behind you, dude.”
Sunghoon and Jake proceeded to laugh at their friend, and you were about to do the same until you realized you had looked to see if Heeseung was laughing along with you. To your delight, he was. That, and the wind was blowing in his hair so perfectly. The golden sun shone across his face in a way that made his eyes crinkle up and his smile grow. You would always scold him for not having sunglasses on him, but, this time, you were a little distracted by how he glowed.
Heeseung then turned to you, one hand on the steering wheel and the other on his thigh. “What’s up?”
“N-nothing at all.” You coughed, tearing your gaze away to look ahead at the freeway. “Are we almost there?”
You just then registered how the backseat had gotten awfully silent, and when you turned to check on The Three Idiots (you deemed this title upon them back in high school, and it stuck), they all had Cheshire grins spread across their faces. It was a little scary, honestly. Their antics were nightmarish on their own, but what their eyes suggested was something that would haunt you. You fought down the heat creeping up your cheeks in an effort to appear indifferent, and you turned back to look at the GPS.
Ten minutes. You had to deal with them for ten more minutes. That was 600 seconds. Maybe you could tune out the testosterone if you counted down your arrival time.
To your relief, though, ten minutes passed by much faster because the four boys got into a heated argument over the superior boba shop in the Bay Area. You had to interject by reminding them that none of them were even from the Bay Area. Heeseung wound up going on a tangent about how he and Choi Yeonjun went on a day trip last weekend, which you would have remembered “if you were a better friend.”
You did remember, actually. Heeseung was texting you the entire time about Yeonjun forcing him to choose between him or a PS5. You presumed that Heeseung chose the PS5 because Yeonjun posted a black screen on his Snapchat story with the caption “dhmu” followed by a wilting rose and broken heart emoji.
(They wound up gaming all night afterward, anyway.)
The Three Idiots sensed tension from the back seat, so they started a new debate: the superior boba shop in Los Angeles.
You couldn’t believe that this was the depth of their conversations.
When you finally arrived at Yizhuo’s country club, you were being nagged by Sunghoon to get out of the car. He was eager to go to the mall and try out a new sushi place that everyone had been raving about. For someone who seemed to lack any seriousness, Sunghoon was extremely diligent about his frequent Yelp reviews; he even got promoted to the Yelp Elite Squad.
“Alright, alright, I’m going!” you complained, shooting Heeseung a withering look—a please save me from your friends, which he grinned at. “Bye, then.”
“Have fun, princess,” Heeseung called as you were closing the door, and you were grateful your back was turned so that he couldn’t see the look on your face.
(“Princess?” Jay questioned. “Did you just call her princess?”
“It’s an inside joke!” Heeseung rebuked.
“And were you just checking her out?” came Jake’s muffled voice from inside the car, and a bark of laughter followed immediately after from Sunghoon and Jay.)
You shook your head when Heeseung sped off as quickly as possible. You could picture it so vividly; he would be defending himself to his dying breath, cheeks bright red as his mouth ran. Although you found it funny, you knew that Heeseung was probably just glancing out the window to make sure you weren’t too close to the car before he drove away.
“Y/N!” Yizhuo called from the entrance. You turned to see her clad in a cotton shirt and tennis skirt, standing next to Zhong Chenle. “Did you think we were swimming or something?”
Yes, you most definitely did think you were going to be sunbathing by the poolside. With a sheer cover-up over your black one-piece, you were definitely not ready to play tennis with Yizhuo and her boyfriend. You even had your red heart-shaped sunglasses on your head.
You let out a petulant whine, taking your walk of shame over to the two. “I’m already in the racquet club, so why would I come here to play more tennis?”
Yizhuo shrugged, but the one thing you loved about her was that she was flexible with plans. “I’ll just change into my swimsuit, then. I’ve been wanting to sunbathe,” she said before handing Chenle her racquet. “Looks like doubles didn’t work out. Are you and Jisung good with playing singles?”
“I don’t mind as long as I win,” Chenle answered with a grin. “See you two later.”
He was clearly delighted because you were probably the only competition he had to worry about. You were sure Park Jisung would complain when he found out that you weren’t going to be his partner. Jisung was utterly hopeless when it came to tennis—or, rather, he was scared of anything flying in his direction.
Yizhuo grabbed her Prada leather tote bag, pulling out a white two-piece with a gold clip in the front after some digging. She excused herself to change quickly, and came back within five minutes. You were grateful she came prepared. For her, though, it was inevitable considering she drove thirty minutes most days to lounge around her country club with Chenle.
“They’re renovating the banquet room right now,” Yizhuo informed as she settled into the lounge chair next to yours. “I was going to invite you for the opening next week, but you’re gonna be in the Bahamas, as usual.”
“Yeah, about that,” you drawled, “vacation plans fell through, so I’m not going anymore.”
“What?” Yizhuo sat up, startling the server who brought over cocktails on a silver plate. “But you always go to the Bahamas!”
You gingerly took one of the cocktail glasses, mouthing your gratitude before turning your attention back to Yizhuo. “My parents wanna spend their honeymoon alone, and Heeseung thinks I’m acting spoiled.”
Yizhuo smirked against the rim of her glass. “How is it that Heeseung always manages to come up in our conversations?”
“He doesn’t!” you exclaimed. “He’s just always around, you know? Like a fruit fly.”
“Just like how Chenle’s always around?”
“Chenle’s your boyfriend; Heeseung’s just a gnat.”
“I’m telling you, Y/N, you and Heeseung are the dictionary definition of couple behavior. I swear, you two are meant for each other.”
You sighed. “Heeseung and I have been best friends since, like, forever. Our relationship is just… different from my other friendships.”
Yizhuo raised a brow, a coy smile still creeping across her face. “So how come you refer to everyone else as friendships, but with him it’s a relationship?”
“Psychoanalyze much?” You sent a mocking smile right back at her. “Can I not have a friend of the opposite gender anymore?”
“You can have one that doesn’t make heart eyes at you,” Yizhuo replied with a scoff. “I’m telling you, the guy’s head over heels.”
“Whatever.” You slipped your sunglasses down to rest on the bridge of your nose. You didn’t want to think about potential romantic feelings for your best friend that could threaten the stability of your life-long friendship. “Let’s circle back to what’s actually important: my summer.”
“Poor Heeseung.” Yizhuo tutted. “Bahamas over love.”
“Love can happen any time,” you said, “but the window of opportunity only opens once, and that golden period is the summer between high school and college. Think about it, Yizhuo! Every summer after this one is gonna be loaded with classes, internships, and work.”
“So, what’s your game plan?”
You pondered on her question. There were only so many options you had, and, clearly, going to the Bahamas was not one of them. Honestly, you hardly felt like a real Californian with the little knowledge you had about what you could even do around your area; all you could think about was the beach or Disneyland. Plus, with Yeji doing a summer program in Irvine and Yizhuo spending her days at her country club, you didn’t have much room for spontaneous activities with them.
Unless you wanted to spend every single day like you would on a regular weekend, you had to find someone who knew how to make things fun.
And, unfortunately, that narrowed it back down to Lee Heeseung.
You turned back to Yizhuo with a sheepish look on your face. “I think I have an idea.”
“Be my summer escort service.”
“Excuse me?” Heeseung nearly choked on the tea your mother made for him. You watched as he set the cup down as delicately as possible while his eyes welled up with tears. He hit his fist against his chest a few times before calming down. “I don’t think you know what an escort service entails, but I think I know what you’re getting at.” He grinned slowly. “You’re taking me up on my offer.”
You did a lot of thinking on the car ride back to Bel Air.
A lot of thinking during the time when Sunghoon wasn’t complaining about the quality of the sushi place they went to. You were almost inspired to write a negative review yourself because of how passionate he was.
“Well, it’s inevitable that I’m gonna be seeing you almost every day, anyway,” you said, “so we might as well make the most of it, right?”
“I knew you’d turn around.” Heeseung reached over and ruffled your hair. “I’ll make sure you have the best summer of your life, Y/N.”
Lee Heeseung excelled at virtually anything. You were sure he would surpass your expectations with these impromptu summer plans, too.
You deemed the nickname “Golden Boy” upon him for this very reason, and it had everything to do with the fact that Heeseung was absolutely perfect at everything he did.
For a while, you even coined a theory that he had been created in a laboratory, specially designed to be absolutely flawless in every way imaginable. Of course Heeseung was born rich, smart, and handsome. Some people were just born lucky into the world, and, when you were younger, it was harder to accept that. Heeseung grew up with the world at his disposal; he got everything and anything he wanted, but that didn’t necessarily mean he took his privilege for granted.
You had to admit that Heeseung was a hard worker when it came down to it. Although he was definitely affluent as a fourth generation trust fund baby, Heeseung made sure his parents were never disappointed with his results.
Throughout high school, he consistently ranked first every single year, always coming right above you after the semester ended. Not to mention, he had even been scouted by several Division 1 schools to join their soccer team. He was even published at the mere age of sixteen for the research he did with a college professor. And, with a face and personality like his, any reasonable mother would’ve loved for their daughter to bring Heeseung home for dinner.
Another thing he never failed to accomplish was making you absolutely flustered.
“Well…” You turned your cheek. “I always have fun when I hang out with you, so don’t let it get to your head.”
“Too late. It’s getting to my head.”
You groaned.
“Hey, we might as well have fun,” Heeseung tried. “It’s not like any of us are vicariously living through each other’s summer romances.”
“Whoa. You said ‘each other.’”
“Yeah?”
You shot him a questioning look. “You’re implying that you have a summer romance that I’m not allowed to live vicariously through.”
“What? No!” Heeseung frowned as he tried to do the mental gymnastics to piece together your reasoning. “I said—actually, you know what, it doesn’t matter what I said. Who cares about being cuffed? Let’s just enjoy the last moments of our youth.”
“You know what, you’re right,” you agreed, getting fired up just by his words. Maybe it was the realization that time was fleeting, but you were determined to have the best summer ever now. “This summer, I’m Percy and you’re Grover. No one’s getting in the way of our side quests.”
“Why do I have to be the half-barnyard animal sidekick?” Heeseung deadpanned. “Can’t I be Annabeth?”
“No, put some respect on a satyr’s title.”
Your best friend picked his cup of tea back up when it had cooled. He blew gently on the surface before taking a careful sip, and then confidently drank more afterward. He set his cup down again and held a finger up, signaling that he wanted a chance to speak again. You were half-expecting it to be about the damn Percy Jackson lore.
“Your parents leave soon, right?” he asked instead. You nodded in response, somewhat surprised about his inquiry, so Heeseung continued, “Do they need a ride to the airport? We could have a sleepover after.”
“I think—”
“We would love a ride to the airport, Heeseung,” your mother gushed from the staircase as she was lugging suitcases down, “but you’re going straight back to your house after taking my daughter home.”
Heeseung swallowed thickly. “O-of course, ma’am. Straight home.”
You pouted a little. “You’re not staying?”
He smirked a little at your reaction, and you were a little flustered and disappointed that you managed to inflate his ego even further.
“Nah, I’ll just—” Heeseung cut himself off quickly when he noticed your mother was suddenly towering behind where he was seated on your couch. “I’ll—I’ll go straight to my house, like I said.”
“Come on, let the kids spend some time together before college,” your stepfather chimed in, following suit with a suitcase of his own. “Y/N hardly ever gets to stay in LA for the summer.”
“We’re going to the same college, Dad,” you pointed out.
“Of course,” He walked over to ruffle your hair, and Heeseung stared up at him as if your stepfather was some respected higher power, “but you never know what could happen in college. People grow apart whether you like it or not, and the life of a college student gets busy, so you two might as well enjoy this summer.”
When all you could do was stare at your stepfather in horror, he added, “I’m not saying you’re gonna stop being friends! It’s just easier to spend time together now than it is in college.”
“That’s why I’m your daughter’s escort this summer,” Heeseung spoke up.
“Escort?” your stepfather pressed. “That’s… a little concerning. Keep it PG, you two.”
“It’s not like that!” you whined. “Anyway, Dad, don’t you have to get to the airport soon?”
He checked his watch quickly and nodded at your mother. “Y/N’s right. We should get going soon, honey. I’m gonna go make sure I didn’t forget to pack anything.”
With that, your stepfather jogged upstairs with Heeseung’s curious eyes following him suspiciously. When you nudged him, trying to figure out why he was mugging your dad for no reason, he grinned a little. He gestured for you to lean closer so that he could speak quietly.
You leaned in close so that your ear was by his lips, and Heeseung whispered, “He’s totally packing your mom’s honeymoon present.”
“How do you know?”
“Classic move. My brother did the same thing for his wife.”
You pulled away, covering your mouth with a shocked look on your face. You had to keep yourself from audibly gasping since your mother was only a room away. Your face broke into a little smile. Seeing someone care for your mother so deeply made you so happy, especially with how she was the one who usually put in the most effort in her past relationships.
All your life, you wanted a relationship that was the complete opposite of your mother’s; now, though, you aspired to find someone who loved you that much.
Speak of the devil. She was walking over as you and Heeseung exchanged mischievous grins.
“What’re you two smiling about?” she asked.
“Nothing!” You smiled and fixed her hair. “Have fun on your honeymoon, Mom. I’ll make sure Heeseung doesn’t get into trouble.”
“Hey!” Heeseung interjected. “I’m not even that bad! Honest-to-god, Jake’s worse than me—just ask Jay or Sunghoon. Actually, don’t ask Sunghoon because I think he has it out for me right now.” He paused before adding, “Now that I think about it, don’t ask Jay, either. Just trust me on this one.”
You scoffed. “Nice going, Hee.”
Your mother smiled, and you could tell that it was a little sad. “We’ll take you to the Bahamas next time, okay, Y/N?” She did a quick sweep of the room before leaning in a little and whispering, “By the way, your stepfather was really happy that you started calling him ‘dad’ the other day. I think he almost cried!”
You hated to admit it out loud, but you felt inexplicably happy at those words.
“I’m ready!” your stepfather called as he came down the stairs. “Do you have everything you need? Are we ready to go?”
“Ready as ever,” your mother answered and turned to your best friend. “Are you ready, Heeseung?”
“Yep.” He got up from the couch, spinning his car keys around his fingers. “Come on, Y/N. Time to say bye-bye to mommy and—ow! Don’t hit me!”
The car ride to the airport wasn’t too long, but you and Heeseung fell into an uncomfortable silence while your parents were gushing about their vacation plans to each other. They weren’t even sitting next to each other. Your mother sat next to you in the back seat and your stepfather sat in the passenger’s seat to accompany Heeseung, but they were still going back and forth. You nearly considered asking your stepfather to switch seats with you so that you wouldn’t be caught in the crossfire of their incessant flirting.
When Heeseung pulled up to the drop-off zone, however, your parents pulled themselves together in record time. You received two kisses on your head from each parent after they got out of the car.
“Heeseung, let’s walk together for a bit,” your stepfather called. When you exchanged a shocked look with your best friend, your dad clicked his tongue with a laugh. “Just until the gates over there. I need some help carrying my bags.”
Heeseung, floundering for words, wound up not saying anything and scrambled to get out of the car to help him out. The conversation seemed to be light and easygoing, but you were craning your neck out of the car window to get a glimpse of what the hell was going on.
“Mom,” you whispered harshly, “tell me Dad isn’t telling Heeseung something weird right now. He’s still traumatized from the time he was interrogated about being my Homecoming date last year.”
Since neither you nor Heeseung had actual dates for the Homecoming dance last year, he made you a poster and asked you to be his date at your doorstep. At the time, you two were binge watching Parks and Recreation together, so he used that as inspiration for your poster: Please don’t REC my plans and say KNOPE to Homecoming. You vividly recalled being impressed by how neat the handwriting was only to be told later that Yeji helped Heeseung make it.
“I’m sure it’s nothing.” Your mother waved it off. “You should be more worried about how Mrs. Lee calls us in the middle of the night and asks where her son is. That’s gonna traumatize your friend.”
Wow. Lee Heeseung was already a pain in the ass to begin with, and only now you realized how his mother had it a thousand times harder.
“Have a safe trip, okay?” you told your mother after you helped her bring the rest of her bags to the gate. “And—don’t worry—I know when the gardener's coming by, so I’ll be home to let him in.”
She smiled fondly and kissed your forehead. “I’ll text you when I land,” she said. “Have fun, sweetheart, but not too much fun.”
“Mom!” you complained, cringing at whatever she was implying.
Heeseung and your stepfather were already at the front doors, and your best friend’s eyes lit up at the sight of you. You wondered if he needed saving from your father, and you confirmed this when you noticed him cower a little after shaking your stepfather’s hand.
“Heeseung,” your mother started, “thanks for bringing us here. I made brownies in the afternoon, so make sure Y/N gives you some before you go home.”
“Brownies?” Heeseung turned to you with a grin and thanked your mother profusely. “I hope you guys have a fun trip.”
After you all exchanged goodbyes, you and Heeseung headed back to his car. You were able to watch your mother and stepfather disappear into the crowd, a strange feeling lingering in your chest. You weren’t sure what it was, but you supposed you felt a little lonely. This was the first summer you were spending without your parents, and you weren’t sure what to expect.
As if Heeseung could read your mind, he said, “Don’t worry. I’ll make sure you have a fun summer.”
“It better be the best summer of my life.”
Heeseung laughed and opened the passenger’s side door for you. “Then let’s start now.”
“Huh? Right now?”
“Let’s get bingsu,” he said. Come to think of it, you were craving shaved ice; you had mentioned it to Heeseung last week. “You said you were hungry, right? And then we can go home and dig into those brownies your mom made.”
“I never said anything about being hungry.”
“But you’re hungry, right?”
The corner of your mouth twitched before breaking into a little smile.
“Alright, let’s go.”
In all honesty, you didn’t expect anything special from Heeseung. That was why you had your own plans laid out for the coming week, and first on your agenda was going shopping with Yizhuo in Beverly Hills. Since your best friend was so adamant on spending the summer with you, though, you let him tag along.
“I hate you,” he muttered through gritted teeth as you handed him yet another shopping bag—Armani, this time. Heeseung was carrying at least six of them, letting them dangle off of his arms. “I said I’d show you how to have fun, not be your butler.”
“You said you would be my summer escort service.”
“Not like this!”
“Y/N, I swear,” Yizhuo started in a low voice, only loud enough to hear (although you wished you didn’t), “he’s like your boyfriend.”
You sped up to walk ahead of Heeseung, and Yizhuo matched your pace. Your poor best friend was lagging in the back, trying to keep up with the weight of your spending spree in his hands. Even though you told him virtually everything, this was a conversation that you couldn’t let him hear.
“He’s just my escort this summer!” you defended.
“His dad’s the senior vice president at Apple. You really think Lee Heeseung would just agree to be anyone’s manservant?”
“Well, I’m not anyone; I’m Y/N, and Heeseung and I have been best friends since forever, so it shouldn’t be surprising that he wants to spend time with me.”
“I’m just saying, it’s a little strange.”
“Yeah, yeah.” You waved off her concerns and pulled out your phone. “By the way, is the group hanging out tomorrow or something?”
“I kept seeing it in the groupchat, but I wasn’t sure whose house it was at,” Yizhuo replied. She turned and called, “Heeseung! Do you know whose house we’re all going to?”
“Tomorrow?” he asked.
“Yeah.”
“Mine.”
“Yours?” you chimed in. “I thought Jake said it would be at his place.”
“He backed out ‘cause his cousins are visiting this week,” he clarified, “so I offered mine. My parents are going out of town, anyway, so why not?”
You were surprised that Heeseung was willing to host. Most of the time his house was the absolute last resort because he hated cleaning up after everyone. For this reason, it was normally at Jake’s house because he was the only one who would tidy up himself without nagging everyone else (read: Jay Park).
You always went to Heeseung’s place on your own. There were never times where the entire group hung out there together, so it felt like everyone was encroaching on your space with Heeseung.
Even though it was his house, technically.
“You’re coming,” Heeseung added, pointing straight at you with narrowed eyes.
You frowned. “You can’t decide that for me!”
“You agreed to let me be your summer escort service, so it’s within my power,” he argued.
You made a frustrated sound. “Fine. It better be fun, though. I’m sacrificing my Pretty Little Liars marathon for you.”
Heeseung rolled his eyes. “We can just watch it together.”
“Lovebirds!” Yizhuo interjected. “I would’ve called Chenle if I knew I was gonna be a third wheel.” Both of you turned to her with wide eyes, watching the blonde’s lips curl up in a small smirk. “What?”
“That’s not what any of this is,” your best friend grumbled.
“Oh yeah? Then why are you blushing?”
Heeseung shook his head, completely turning his face away from you. You managed to catch the tips of his ears flaming bright red. It was rather easy to make Heeseung flustered, so this wasn’t something out of the ordinary, but, for some reason, you felt butterflies in the pit of your stomach.
He walked ahead, saying something along the lines of, “Let’s just keep shopping!”
You and Yizhuo exchanged a look before hooking arms and bursting into a fit of giggles.
Yizhuo called after him, “We’re going to Miu Miu next!”
Slumber parties with your friend group sounded cute and tame, in theory. Add six men into the mix, and they became slightly terrifying.
“This is why we need to make plans in our group chat without the men,” Shen Xiaoting muttered to you with her eyes fixed on Heeseung’s flat screen TV. “This is not the girls night I was envisioning.”
Your friend group of eleven (excluding Yeji, who was away for the summer) was currently playing their ninth round of Mario Kart 8. You were all taking turns, though, since the game only catered to co-oping with four people. Frankly, you were starting to get tired of the game after about five rounds. You were hellbent on beating Jay, who was talking smack about how terrible you were at gaming, but it turned out that he was no better. You ended up beating him in the first race itself, and now you were just waiting for them to wrap it up.
“Fuck,” Jake hissed once Choi Beomgyu used his blue shell on him. Jake had been consistently winning every game he played despite everyone trying to get him in last place; in the last round, Kim Minjeong made a valiant effort to use most of her Crazy 8 items on him.
You were surprised that Jake showed up in the first place. Everyone suspected that he would be stuck at home because of his cousins visiting, but he somehow managed to get his way out of it. Although he was late, he showed up at Heeseung’s door with a pillow and a handle of cheap vodka. It probably tasted rancid, but there was no room for anyone to complain.
“Get the item box, get the item box!” Chenle yelled. “But you’re kind of screwed if you don’t get a super horn or a super star.”
“So, when are we wrapping up Mario Kart?” Nakamura Kazuha asked, sighing in frustration after being hit with a shell for the umpteeth time.
“Uh, after this game,” Heeseung replied.
“And how many more rounds is that?”
“Three.”
“Jesus Christ.”
The only girl in your group who enjoyed gaming was Yizhuo, but even she was tired of the seemingly endless rounds. Since the boys were going along with the girls’ plans later on, though, you had to be patient. Appease them with Mario Kart, and then the rest of the night was yours.
Somehow, you managed to grit your teeth and sit through the next three rounds (won by Jake, Yizhuo, and Beomgyu, respectively). Afterward, Jake got up to grab the case of Mike’s Harder on the kitchen island. He proceeded to open it up and hand each person a can.
Xiaoting cracked open her can and asked, “How’d you even buy these? Didn’t your dad confiscate your fake or something?”
Around a few months ago, Jake’s dad had caught him wasted at one of their charity galas. Apparently, the Sims didn’t care too much about their son drinking, but they were furious about Jake acting disorderly in front of their guests. Naturally, Jake was grounded for a month and got all four of his fake IDs confiscated. He deeply missed the one from Connecticut where his name was printed as Nathan Fielder, even though Jake looked nothing like Nathan Fielder.
“I got Vernon to buy them for me,” Jake said, “and please don’t remind me about the fakes. It still wounds me to this day.”
You remembered you used to have a little crush on Vernon Chwe, who was a senior when you were a freshman. When he graduated, you almost cried actual tears, but you stayed strong when you went to congratulate him after the ceremony. You figured he would have been a little freaked out if you started breaking down out of nowhere.
Jay, who was inspecting the handle of SKYY Vodka, let out a scoff. “Vernon? Then you could’ve at least asked for good vodka.”
“We can just make mixed drinks,” you spoke up, scrunching up your nose at the memory of blacking out because of alcohol during your prom afterparties. “Plus, it’s not like we’re actually trying to get drunk tonight.”
“Yeah.” Heeseung stood up and rested his arm on your shoulder. “Y/N and I can make the drinks. The rest of you can help put snacks out. Someone can put a movie on, too.”
Since everyone was impressed with Heeseung taking the lead for once, the plan was set into motion. While Kazuha and Sunghoon bickered over which movie to play, the rest of your friends brought out different snacks for the movie. Arguably, you and Heeseung had the hardest job, but you didn’t need any extra hands for drinks. By the time it took you two to finish eleven mixed drinks, they probably would have settled on a movie.
You looked back to see Heeseung eyeballing a shot into a glass cup, and then he proceeded to down its contents. You cringed when you saw him drinking. The last time he got drunk resulted in you trying to calm him down after he went on a long rant about how he just ate sushi, and the alcohol in his system would cause the raw fish to start swimming. You had to convince him that no, vodka would not bring an already dead and sliced-up fish to life.
Heeseung’s face soured and he pushed the handle aside. “Y’know what, let’s just take something from my parents’ liquor cabinet. This shit is vile.”
“You got triple sec and decent vodka?” you asked. “We could make Lemon Drops.”
“You read my mind.”
“You weren’t even thinking about that, were you?”
“Not at all.”
While you and Heeseung were making the drinks, though, you noticed some giggles coming from the living room. You raised your head to see about five of your friends look away as fast as they could. It hit you before you had time to process what was going on; they were making fun of you and Heeseung together.
You had no clue why. Sure, Heeseung and you had some strange moments here and there. But you two were just making drinks, for crying out loud. Nothing about the situation warranted this reaction from them.
You side-eyed Heeseung to see if he noticed. Thankfully, he was just focused on pouring the right amount of vodka so he didn’t accidentally kill anyone. You, on the other hand, were fighting down the heat rising in your chest.
After a brief war between you and Yizhuo, consisting of you glaring at her and her smirking at you, you ended up setting down a glass and sighing.
“Heeseung,” you said, “go crazy with the vodka in the rest of their drinks.”
“Huh?” he asked, genuinely contemplating whether or not to do it.
“Pour as much as your heart desires,” you muttered and set down six of the Lemon Drops on a tray with a little too much force. Without sparing him a glance, you picked up the tray and went to the living room to hand everyone their glasses. While you handed Yizhuo hers, though, you whispered, “I despise you.”
She grinned. “What? Still denying you like him?”
“I don’t like—”
“You like someone?” Heeseung called from the island, completely frozen in place.
You turned and stared at him, mouth agape.
Chenle spoke up, “No, she likes y—”
You kicked Chenle’s shin with enough force to shut him up, and he grunted before he could continue his sentence. Satisfied, you turned back to Heeseung and shook your head quickly.
“They’re just being idiots,” you explained. “Hurry up with the drinks. We’re watching My Best Friend’s Wedding.” You did a double take and turned back to Yizhuo, harshly whispering, “Why the fuck are we watching My Best Friend’s Wedding?!”
Yizhuo removed Chenle’s hand from her knee and stood up to loop your arm with hers. “Come.”
“Where are we going?” you asked, but she was already dragging you away from the living room. “Is that movie supposed to be some sort of sick message?”
“Oh, good. So you’re aware.”
After making some excuse about needing your assistance to get something from her bag, Yizhuo walked with you to the foyer until she turned on you. You nearly tripped backward over one of the boys’ shoes, so you used the wall to regain your balance.
“Tell me what’s going on between you two,” she ordered.
You let out a sound of exasperation. “Yizhuo, for the last time, Heeseung and I are just friends. That’s all there is to it.”
“I’m just saying, the two of you are going to college together and all, but you have to sort out your feelings before you end up figuring them out after Heeseung finds someone else,” she said. “I mean, what’re you gonna do when Heeseung starts dating someone else? He looks decent enough to pull, so there’s no telling what’s gonna happen when he’s cut loose in Yale.”
You snorted. “He’s already cut loose. I highly doubt Yale’s gonna change anything.”
“You never know. I just don’t want you to realize your feelings too late—you know, when things get messy.”
You both were silent for a few seconds before Beomgyu called, “Y/N, Yizhuo, we’re gonna start the movie!”
“Coming!” you responded.
You chose not to respond to your best friend because you truly had no idea what to think, but it did leave seeds of doubt in your head. It almost distracted you from the fact that Heeseung grabbed your arm and pulled you to sit down next to him. This was bad; you were quickly becoming overly self-conscious of every little thing he did, and that would not bode well for your friendship.
Whatever, you told yourself. Push it down.
“Are there any more pillows?” you asked, scanning the room to see that everyone seemed to have one except you. You looked back at Heeseung and narrowed your eyes at his throw pillow. “Give me yours.”
“What? No way.”
“I wanna lay down,” you whined. He was really the only person you could act a little spoiled around. “Give me your pillow before I—”
Before you could finish, Heeseung threw his arm around you and pushed your head down so that you were laying on his lap. You were startled with the sudden gesture, but you didn’t complain. He was comfortable, after all, and you two usually watched movies like this in your house. So, you adjusted your position a little and continued watching the movie, making a mental note to scold Heeseung later for being all touchy in front of the friend group.
What you weren’t used to, though, was the way he started threaded his fingers through your hair.
You did the only thing you knew how to do in order to deflect; you showed Heeseung a TikTok of a baby otter. Your volume was all the way down, but you still bookmarked the video.
“Look,” you whispered, holding up your phone. His gentle fingers did not stop running through your hair, but at least you could hold onto his friendly hum of acknowledgement. It was the only thing that made any of this feel remotely platonic. “It’s a little guy.”
“Oh, it’s so cute,” Heeseung mused. “Kind of reminds me of you.”
Screw platonic.
He just grabbed platonic and drop kicked it to the next dimension.
That was it. You were going to put your phone away and ignore Heeseung for the rest of the movie. The rest of the movie would be watched in complete silence. In fact, you weren’t going to spare Heeseung any attention for the rest of the sleepover.
That didn’t end up happening, though. Ten minutes later, you cracked and started commenting about the movie to Heeseung. Unbeknownst to the others, you two ended up texting each other messages that threatened to make you burst into laughter. Even though you were sitting right next to each other, you felt like this made your conversation feel like a little secret, like even Heeseung wanted to keep what you two had to himself.
When the movie ended, you two were surprisingly still awake, although there were several moments where you were tempted to doze off on Heeseung’s shoulder. Minjeong, Beomgyu, and Jay were still up, and they were taking pictures of Chenle and Yizhuo to send to the group chat. You immediately separated from Heeseung, feeling a little terrified that you two would be the victims next. However, the others were so preoccupied with Chenle’s arms wrapped around his sleeping girlfriend and their foreheads pressed together.
“Should we wake them up?” Kazuha asked.
“Nah, let them sleep,” Heeseung answered and stood up. “I’m gonna brush my teeth. You guys can use the other bathrooms—just not the one in my parents’ room.”
Minjeong stretched as she let out a yawn. “Alright, I’m gonna wash up, then. I’m exhausted.”
After Minjeong, Beomgyu, and Kazuha left the room to get their bags and wash up, you stared at Heeseung. Your best friend looked confused until you pointed toward his glass.
“Chug it,” you said with mischief dancing in your eyes.
“You’re kidding. It’s bedtime.”
You mocked a pout. “You’re gonna waste the drink I made just for you?”
“Oh, come on—we made it for everyone!”
“But I definitely made this one.” You took the glass and held it out to him, which he ended up taking reluctantly. “I wanna see you finish it.”
After a wince, Heeseung tilted the cup back and downed the contents. Although his face scrunched up, he relaxed once he had finished swallowing it down.
“That was actually pretty good,” he said.
“See? When have I ever let you down?”
“Honestly? Many times.”
You elbowed him in the side. “Hey!”
“Kidding!” Heeseung held his arms up in surrender before wrapping them around your waist. Another gesture you weren’t quite used to, but you went along with it. There was something funny about Heeseung; nothing he did ever made you feel the slightest bit uncomfortable, but sometimes you weren’t sure if it was meant to be friendly. “Let’s go brush our teeth.”
“I can just use the bathroom on the second floor.”
“Huh? Just use the one in my room,” he said. “Come on.”
You hesitated before following your best friend upstairs. First of all, you were feeling overly-conscious about going into Heeseung’s room with him. Secondly, you weren’t too enthusiastic about the fact that you had to use a man’s bathroom.
To Heeseung’s credit, he kept his room and bathroom mostly spotless. Sure, there were a few sweaters piled over the head of his chair and some books left scattered across his desk, but it was definitely cleaner than Jake’s mess of a room. You remembered Yeji stepping across his piles of dirty clothes left on the floor, as if they were hazardous to her health.
As soon as you stepped into the grand bathroom, you realized that you had forgotten your toothbrush. It wasn’t the first time this happened, so you knew to just take one of the unopened toothbrushes from the drawer. However, Heeseung told you they moved some things around, so you wound up searching for the spare toothbrushes for around five minutes.
It was almost ridiculous how Heeseung needed a bathroom bigger than a living room.
You two brushed your teeth side-by-side. Heeseung occasionally cracked jokes that made you giggle and tilt your head back so that your toothpaste wouldn’t dribble down your chin. When that happened, he reached over and wiped your lower lip with his thumb, despite your complaints about how gross that was.
But, to you, it wasn’t really all that gross.
If only Heeseung knew how his actions made your cheeks burn hot under your skin.
The next week was interesting, to say the least.
Heeseung wouldn’t let you rest for a second. You were going out with him every single day, having to see his face from sunrise to sunset. Even when it was nightfall, he would just invite himself over to your place and crash on your couch.
You pointed out that you had a perfectly tidy guest room for him to use, but he insisted that he preferred your couch. You didn’t mind him sprawled out across the cushions because you could take as many pictures of him sleeping as you pleased. You would show him your collection later when he woke up, and Heeseung would get embarrassed to the point of tickling you until you were in hysterics and gasping out that you would delete the pictures from your camera roll.
At this point, it was almost like you two were living together. Even though his parents were out of town, you felt slightly anxious about one of the adults in your parents’ circle discovering what you and Heeseung were up to. Not that it was anything scandalous.
But, you had to admit, you were having fun.
On Monday, Heeseung took you to the beach. You complained incessantly about waking up at six in the morning for cold water and sand all over your clothes, but you managed to drag yourself out of bed. Still, Heeseung had to put up with your grumbles and groans until you were energized enough to stop complaining. All it took was Heeseung feeding you a granola bar and making you coffee while you did your hair.
“C’mon,” he told you, the wind sweeping his hair to the side as the first rays of sunlight shone bright against his glowing skin, “this is exactly like the Bahamas if you close your eyes.”
“Uh-huh.”
You rolled your eyes at him, but you spent the entire day at the beach with Heeseung, anyway. You finally warmed up to going into the water with him, letting him take your hands and guide you deeper until the water was up to your waist. At one point, a particularly heavy wave pushed him closer to you until you both were chest-to-chest. You had to hold onto his bicep to keep yourself from floating away. And you swore you caught Heeseung checking you out in your bikini later on, but he turned away with pink-tinged ears immediately after.
Later, when the sun was starting to set and you retreated from the water to curl up in your towel, you sat on your large beach towel and waited for Heeseung to bring over food from the food trucks. The tide was getting higher, so you had to move yours and Heeseung’s belongings further up the sand.
Heeseung returned with two takeout boxes of tacos, taking a seat next to you with a relieved sigh. Since you two hadn’t eaten a proper lunch, you had been waiting for this meal all day. You were properly tuckered out from all the swimming and beach volleyball, so you dug in immediately.
“Good?” Heeseung asked, watching you eat with a small smile on his face. He must have been impressed that you practically inhaled your first taco in under five seconds.
“Good,” you confirmed, voice muffled.
With the back of your hand shielding your eyes, you looked off into the horizon to watch the sunlight ripple across the water’s surface.
And, yeah, maybe it was a little like the Bahamas.
Just a little.
You didn’t expect Heeseung to wake you up on Tuesday morning and drag you to an empty field. Although he told you that he had a surprise for you, you didn’t think it warranted being woken up at 5:30 a.m. without a clue of where you were going.
“Alright, close your eyes, okay? It’s a surprise,” Heeseung said, gesturing for you to cover your gaze. You found it adorable that he was fumbling so much, so you closed your eyes with a grin. “Keep them closed—hold on.”
“Heeseung, how much longer?” you whined.
“And,” he drawled, stretching out the syllable, “open!”
When you opened your eyes, towering over you was a 60-foot tall hot air balloon, its brightly-patterned nylon reflecting the bright sunlight. You boggled at its impressive size—absolutely massive. The pilot got down from the basket, walking over so that he could greet you two and provide a rundown of safety measures and procedures.
An hour later, you were in the sky, eyes sweeping over the expanse of Los Angeles. You were never that great with heights, but, somehow, you weren’t too afraid as you peered down. Heeseung stood beside you, keeping one hand on the small of your back as he pointed out different landmarks he recognized.
“I’ve never seen LA like this!” you yelled over the wind, cupping your hand around your mouth so that Heeseung could hear you.
He grinned. “Isn’t it beautiful? Makes the city actually feel peaceful for once.”
You wouldn’t dare admit it but, all the way up in the sky, thousands of feet above ground level, what made you feel like you were soaring was Heeseung’s arm slipping around your waist.
On Wednesday, Heeseung took you fishing. You absolutely hated the idea, but once you had the fishing rod in your hands, you were determined to catch the biggest fish. Heeseung ended up catching more than you, but the two fish you caught were stars in your eyes. By the end of the day, you were laughing hysterically as Heeseung’s hat got stuck in your hook and was flung into the water.
On Thursday, Heeseung took you to play mini-golf. You had gone golfing before with company executives and their kids, but this was different. You didn’t have to show off or try to be the best one there; you just had fun and laughed whenever your best friend missed the ball. You two ended the day by going to an arcade and playing almost every game inside.
By Friday morning, you were exhausted. Your limbs were aching when you woke up the next morning, but Heeseung promised to actually let you rest over the weekend. Tonight was Yizhuo’s country club’s party to celebrate the opening of their new banquet hall, so Heeseung only planned one thing for the morning so that you would have time to get ready for the party later.
Pushing your red Jacquemus sunglasses onto your head, you fixed your best friend with a puzzled stare. He was acting weird all morning, from nearly snapping at you for trying to open the trunk of his car, to staying silent when you asked where he was taking you.
For a moment, you wondered if this was the climax of a horror movie where the killer drove you to a quiet place to get rid of you. Your suspicion raised more when Heeseung parked by a marina with a hiking trail nearby.
This is where your body’s being dumped, you concluded grimly.
But, then again, this was Lee Heeseung. He cried when he was eleven because there was a spider on his backpack; he didn’t have the heart to hurt anyone, especially not you. In fact, you recalled when he nearly passed out in middle school because he thought he caused you extreme pain once. (It turned out to be your period cramps.)
“Are you gonna tell me where you’re taking me?” you asked, exasperated. “If we’re swimming, I’m gonna tell you right now that there’s no way I’m getting my hair wet before the party.”
Heeseung chuckled. “Don’t worry your pretty little head, princess. We’re just going for a spin on the lake.” He nodded his head in the direction of the yachts lined up by the shoreline. “Jog your memory?”
When your gaze landed on the gorgeous white yacht gleaming under the sun, you couldn’t help but gasp at its glorious sight. Heeseung had gotten the yacht for his birthday last year, but he never had the time to actually use it. One reason was because he didn’t trust his friends to not trash it, and the other being that he wanted his first ride on it to be special.
Your face burned. His first ride was going to be with you.
“Shut up.” You were gaping at the sight before turning to your best friend, who looked smug while he parked his car. “Shut up. You’re actually letting me go on your yacht?”
“Yeah, why not?” He tried to brush it off as something casual, but your heart was still doing cartwheels and flips. “It’s about time I went out on it.”
You two walked down to the harbor together, your hands sometimes shyly brushing and pulling away swiftly. There had been moments of thick, unspoken tension throughout the week, but you didn’t have the courage to bring it up.
Once you two reached Heeseung’s yacht, he firmly slapped his hand against the smooth, brilliant white surface. “Carver c52 Command Bridge,” he gloated. “Isn’t she beautiful?”
You snorted. “You talk about boats the same way old white men do.”
You allowed him to help you into the yacht, gripping his hand tight as you stepped onto the deck. You hadn’t questioned it before, but as soon as Heeseung let go of you, he set down the picnic basket so that he could spread out the blanket.
You helped him with the corners of the blanket. “What’s this?”
“Well, I thought we could sail out a little and then have breakfast on the deck,” he replied coolly, as if the sincerity of his words wouldn’t make your heart twist painfully in your chest. You really didn’t deserve such effort from him, and it almost made you feel guilty that you had acted so spoiled before. “I’ll go start the engine. You can just enjoy the view.”
However, you followed him to the cockpit. Heeseung raised a brow at you, but you giggled as you took a seat behind him, watching as he stood at the helm, fiddling with some controls you knew nothing about.
“You actually know how to operate this thing?” you asked.
“My dad taught me,” he explained. “I’m not licensed, though, so I don’t think this is exactly legal.”
“Not like that’s stopped you before.”
Heeseung grinned to himself. He started up the yacht’s engine by pressing a button on the dashboard. You watched his hands fly across the levers and controls before he started turning the wheel to steer out of the marina.
“You wanna head out to the deck?” he called out over his shoulder, but you just took the empty seat next to him. “Don’t you wanna sunbathe? Or you could check out the stateroom.”
“Nope,” you said, resting your chin on the palm of your hand as you watched him. “I’d rather wait for you.”
Sometimes, you’d almost catch Heeseung getting flustered. He’d always laugh and rub his nose, looking away shyly before anyone caught onto his awkwardness. The same reaction was unfolding before you right now, and you couldn’t help but smile like an idiot yourself.
You wondered if he ever felt butterflies in his stomach, too.
Once Heeseung had driven the yacht out far enough—far out enough in the water where the water was still and no one was there to disturb you two. You both headed out to the deck again. He took a seat to lay out what he packed in his picnic basket, and you removed your sundress so that you could tan a little in your bikini.
“Champagne?” he offered, holding up a bottle of Dom Pérignon that he most definitely stole from his family’s wine cellar.
You pulled out the two wine glasses in the basket and held them out for Heeseung to pour your drinks, smiling wide as he tipped the bottle. “Yes, please.”
“See, you wouldn’t be able to experience this if you were in the Bahamas right now.” He pushed his sunglasses up onto his head. “We didn’t get to hang out like this any of the past summers.”
“As if we don’t hang out almost every day.”
“But this is different!” he argued. “It’s summer. It’s not like we’re making impromptu plans to New York and flying back home a day later to study for an exam. We have all the time in the world right now.”
He was right, in a sense. You and Heeseung were always together, but you two never really got to spend long days together like this. You two got to make plans without involving anyone else in the friend group for once, and it was a lot more fun than you had expected.
“Do you think we’d be this close if we weren’t rich?” you asked after a while. Heeseung raised a brow at your question, so you clarified, “I’m serious! We wouldn’t be able to do stuff like this—flying in hot air balloons, driving yachts, going to country club parties—if we didn’t have rich parents.”
Heeseung crossed his arms behind his head and pondered, looking up at the sky with a wistful expression. He hummed before answering, “I’d like to think that we’d make it work the same way everyone else does.”
“Really?”
“Yep.”
“What if… you were rich and I wasn’t? Or vice-versa?”
“Yeah, I mean…” he trailed off for a moment, eyes cast down as if he was trying to find the words on his tongue. Then, he continued, “I think I’d be happy doing anything with you, even if all we could do together was sit at home and watch TV.”
Whatever response you had prepared at the back of your throat had died on your tongue. All you could do was look at him helplessly, wondering why his words were making your heart beat faster than when you were thousands of feet up in the sky days ago. You wondered why such gentle words from your best friend had roused a violent storm in your heart.
The wind picked up, sending your hair flying every which way. Heeseung reached out to brush a loose strand of hair away from your face, fingers lingering on your cheek as he pulled back. You went completely still, chest frozen mid-breath as he pulled away.
“You had something in your hair,” he mumbled, quickly scrambling to offer you a caprese skewer. If you looked closely enough, you would’ve noticed that his ears were bright red. “Eat quickly before the food gets stale.”
“I don’t think food normally goes stale that fast.”
“Shut up.”
There was one thing about formal gatherings that all trust fund babies could agree on: only get drunk behind your parents’ backs.
They definitely knew what was going on, but they paid no attention as long as their children were staying safe and not embarrassing themselves. When you were much younger, you would always catch sight of the older kids sneaking away to get drunk in the bathroom, but you never understood the excitement they felt until you became a freshman in high schooler, being dragged away by Yeji to drink with the older kids.
Back then, you were doe-eyed and curious as Vernon would pour shots for you in moderation. Now, you were nearly gagging when Yizhuo handed you a shooter of Pink Whitney.
You two had locked yourselves in the bathroom with Xiaoting, Kazuha, and Minjeong as Yizhuo pulled out various shooters from her purse. It was fine for you to drink wine with the other adults, but you were all certain that the adults would frown upon you drinking hard liquor in front of the other guests. So, the five of you snuck away to get drunk secretly.
For the past fifteen minutes, as you all were downing shooter after shooter, the girls had been pressing you about something going on between you and Heeseung. After he posted you on his Instagram story, showing off his boat in the process, you were bombarded with texts that you were only able to ignore until you got to the party.
A loud knock at the door nearly scared you out of your wits, causing Minjeong to bark out a laugh at the sight of you flinching.
“Occupied!” you yelled, although the syllables slurred together strangely.
“It’s us!” came Jake’s voice. “We’re going drunk golfing.”
You frowned and stepped aside to let Yizhuo open the door for Jake. He scanned his surroundings nervously before shoving his fists into his pockets and stepping into the girls’ bathroom.
“Jake,” Xiaoting started. Although her face and neck were completely red, she focused her eyes on him to keep a serious tone. “We need you to tell us if Heeseung’s into Y/N or not.”
“Xiaoting!” you complained.
“You know what, I’d like to know, too,” Jake replied with shocking enthusiasm. He leaned against the crystal sink, folding his arms across his chest. “Screw drunk golf; this is way more fun. Y/N, do you have feelings for Heeseung? ‘Cause everyone wants to know if—”
“Jake, we didn’t bring you in here for girl talk,” Minjeong cut him off with a wave of her hand. “We brought you in here for answers.”
He let out a childish whine. “But I wanna be here for girl talk.”
“Wait, but answer his question.” Yizhuo turned to you with a wide grin on her face, handing you yet another shooter—probably to make you more honest. You seriously wished you could call Chenle over to put a leash on your friend. “Do you have feelings for Heeseung?”
Did you? You had never been so confused about where you and Heeseung stood until this week. You two had always been close—always did everything together—so why were you feeling conscious about everything now?
But, despite all of your confusion, the one thing that was clear to you was that you felt something for Lee Heeseung with every beat of your heart.
Everything he did, everything he said—you weren’t sure what it was that had you so intoxicated on his attention, but you knew you would’ve felt sick to your stomach if he did the things he did with you with any other girl.
You felt it whenever you saw him lounging around your house, digging into the brownies your mother made as if he lived there. You felt it whenever someone told a joke and the two of you made eye contact with each other first, hoping to see if the other person found it funny, too. You felt it whenever he touched your hand and called you princess, unaware that your heart was fluttering pathetically in your chest.
His smile, his laugh, his happiness—you wanted to be the cause of it all.
You caved with a defeated sigh. “Yeah, I think I might actually have feelings for him.”
A collective cheer erupted in the bathroom, the sound echoing for a few seconds after. Jake stood up just to high-five Yizhuo so hard that the impact left their palms stinging, and then Yizhuo proceeded to scold Jake for putting his full force into the high-five. You pinched the bridge of your nose with embarrassment flooding your chest.
Jake decided to abandon the boys’ plans to go drunk golfing and spent the next ten minutes discussing strategies to get you and Heeseung alone. He had integrated himself into your circle so well that he almost seemed like one of the girls. You slowly backed up into one of the stalls during their conversation, starting to feel horribly nauseous and lightheaded. You were pretty sure that Yizhuo handing you shooter after shooter was starting to have adverse effects on your body.
“How about we tell him that Y/N’s puking in the bathroom and he needs to—” Minjeong cut herself off as soon as she heard you retching by the toilet. “Oh, wow, she’s actually puking in the bathroom.” She turned to Jake after opening the door for him. “Go get Heeseung.”
“If you let me join girl talk next time,” Jake bargained.
“Are you seriously negotiating with me in this situation?”
“Yes.”
Minjeong groaned. “Okay, fine, Jake, we’ll invite you the next time we have girl talk. Now go fetch Heeseung.”
“On it!” he agreed quickly. “Don’t die, Y/N.”
“I’ll try not to” you croaked out weakly, your head hanging between your knees as you willed yourself to not barf out your guts.
“Are you okay?” Kazuha pouted as she rubbed your back in soothing circles. “This is all because you kept making her drink, Yizhuo.”
“I didn’t make her,” she retorted. “Y/N, do you need water or anything? I can ask someone in the kitchen for liquid IV, too.”
You shook your head. “No, just bring Heeseung here.”
They shared a secretive giggle, but you didn’t care. You felt way too sick to mind the girls teasing you. You even tried to distract yourself on your phone, but the bright screen just made you feel worse. You closed your eyes and leaned your head back against the wall, groaning miserably.
It had really gotten to the point where you didn’t care that you were sitting on the country club’s public bathroom floor. It was all fancy and sanitary, of course, but you would normally feel icky about this sort of scenario playing out.
You weren’t sure how long it had been, but eventually, you heard the door opening and the rest of the girls rushed to make sure it wasn’t someone outside the group. You heard them ushering Heeseung inside, explaining what had happened to you before they left the bathroom.
Heeseung knocked on your stall as a formality but let himself inside, anyway. The crooked grin on his face upon seeing you only made you turn your head away and sigh in exasperation.
You turned your head back to face him when you heard his shutter go off.
A scowl was plastered across your face. “Did you just take a picture of me?”
Heeseung snickered. “Yeah, I’m posting it on my story. Right after the one of you looking all pretty on my boat.”
“You’re supposed to be here to help me.”
“That’s why I brought soda,” he replied, holding up an entire bottle of Sprite. You were confident he snagged it from the kitchen, which you were pretty sure would result in Yizhuo scolding him for treating the country club like his house. “Anyway, why’d you drink so much? Just because I’m driving you home doesn’t mean you’re allowed to give yourself alcohol poisoning.”
You settled back into your previous position with your head between your knees. This way, Heeseung wouldn’t be able to see how stupid in love you were. There was absolutely no way you could tell him that you were mindlessly drinking while you were spilling your feelings for him.
“Where’d the girls go?” you asked instead.
“I told them to go drunk golfing while I took care of you.”
“Don’t you wanna go play, too?”
Heeseung shrugged. He took a seat on the floor next to you, not minding the indecency even though he was sober. You felt like your heart was going to explode if he kept doting on you like this.
“I can always go play another time,” he said. “Plus, I’d have more fun if you were there.”
You both went quiet for a moment. The weight of Heeseung’s words only made your heart feel heavier, and you weren’t sure how much longer you could go pretending that you only cared for him as a friend.
Then, your stomach started churning and twisting with the need to puke out your guts again, and the silence was filled with your retching. Heeseung rubbed your back sympathetically and held your hair back while you hunched over the toilet seat again.
This was definitely going down as one of your most unflattering moments.
“Want some soda?” Heeseung tried.
You shook your head.
“Drink some water, then—here,” he said, handing you a red solo cup that was filled to the brim. “I stole it from Hoon.”
Reluctantly, you lifted your head to accept the cup from him. When you took a sip, though, you just ended up hawking and spitting out the contents into the toilet.
Trying your best not to gag, you got out, “Not water—vodka.”
“Oh, my bad.” Heeseung frowned, inspecting the cup. “Why’d Hoon pour this much? No wonder he drove the golf cart into the lake.”
After throwing up basically everything in your stomach, you started to feel dizzy all over again, stumbling and wobbling all over the bathroom until Heeseung had to hold you upright. He had already gotten Yizhuo’s approval to drive you home for the night, but there was no way you were making it to his Tesla in your heels. Heeseung had you hang tight while he ran to his car to get your Dolce & Gabbana rubber slides, knowing there was no possible way for him to carry you out to the car without the adults getting suspicious.
You felt much more comfortable in your slides, so you walked out hand-in-hand with Heeseung while he held onto your heels. Although you felt bad about leaving Yizhuo’s grand opening party early, you figured that it would be more shameful for her parents to see you in this state.
You had greatly underestimated the power of alcohol.
After you had walked up to about three different cars that weren’t Heeseung’s (including Jay’s Mercedes Benz, which started going off once you pulled on the handle), he had finally grabbed you by the shoulders and manually directed you to his Tesla. You giggled as you got into the passenger’s seat, allowing him to buckle you in and watch over you as he called Jay to turn his car alarm off.
Heeseung shot you a glance as he drove out of the country club’s gated entrance. “You’re going straight to bed when we get home.”
“Don’t wanna.”
He surprisingly gave up fast on trying to convince you. “What do you wanna do, then?”
“I dunno.” You shrugged. “Anything. Wanna bake cookies? Or watch a show?”
“Down for a show. Don’t know if I trust you around kitchen appliances right now,” he answered. After letting out a giggle, you caught Heeseung’s smile illuminated by the moonlight. “See? Aren’t you having more fun than you would’ve had in the Bahamas?”
“I wouldn’t ask this question after I nearly got alcohol poisoning.”
“The important thing is that you didn’t.”
You snorted, but something fond unraveled in your chest. You rolled the window down and looked outside, watching the bright lights of the city twinkle and shine under the inky black sky. You remembered all the skies you watched with Heeseung this week—the hazy gray in the morning, the bright blues of the afternoon, and the faint peony glow at sunset. And, yeah, you would’ve given up the Bahamas any day for this.
“Yeah,” you answered him, though you weren’t quite sure if he could hear you over the wind, “I’m having a lot of fun, Hee.”
Two weeks flew by far too quickly.
You were dumbfounded when you realized your parents were coming back the next day. You had spent two entire weeks solely with Heeseung, and you were having so much fun that you totally lost track of time. You were so caught up in your adventures that it had completely slipped your mind that summer would eventually come to an end.
Heeseung suggested that you two spent your last night doing something special. You had no idea what that meant, but you went along with whatever he had planned.
Apparently, he had been wanting to take you to see the stars, but you didn’t realize that he meant the observatory until you were in his car, parking on the steep slope of a hillside.
“It’s so far,” you complained.
He tutted. “It’s a five minute walk, princess, and it’s worth it. Trust me.”
You hesitated before grouching again, “It’s cold.”
Without another word, Heeseung took off his sweater. You tried to peel your eyes away from his white shirt that kept hiking up as he did. He passed it to you, and you couldn’t do anything but accept it because he was already getting out of the car. You wanted to hand it back to him because you knew he would be cold (made evident by the goosebumps that pricked his arms), but he profusely refused. He seemed perfectly content at the mere sight of you joining him.
He waited as you slipped on his sweater, the biggest grin stretching across his face. You were a little blindsided by how blinding Heeseung’s smile was, especially under the glow of the moon. Your cheeks heated up a little when you smelled faint traces of his Blackberry & Bay cologne in the fabric.
“You’re microscopic in my clothes,” he teased. You started walking a little faster to catch up with your friend, but his comment made you punch his shoulder.
“Oh, shut up.” You waved off the comment, but part of you liked how the sleeves of his sweater fell past your wrists. “We used to be the same height in, like, middle school.”
Heeseung barked out a laugh. “That was so long ago! Look at our height difference now.” Before you could anticipate his actions, he stepped in front of you and compared both of your heights.
You looked up at your best friend, raising a brow at his comment. Of course you were aware. Maybe at one point you denied it, but that was when you both were in elementary school and Heeseung would tug on your hair because he sat behind you.
Being this close to him made you a little nervous. After realizing that you had feelings for him, it was becoming difficult to keep them at bay. It was very clear that Heeseung had become much more masculine over the years with his buffer chest, muscular arms, and deeper voice.
And he looked extremely attractive.
“Yeah, I know you’re tall,” you replied flatly. It was normal for Heeseung to tease you, but whenever he did so in public, you always felt your heart squeeze in your chest. Then, he’d brush it off, and the feeling would fade out like bubbles floating to the ground. “You know, giving me your sweater and messing around like this probably gives people the wrong idea, right?”
“Oh… does it?” Heeseung mumbled, voice an octave higher than usual, and he turned his face away before you could detect the dust of pink across his cheeks. “By the way, have you been to a planetarium before?”
“Nope.”
You had always heard of the large domes that showcased the night sky. People sat underneath as a narrator droned on about stories from the past and the history of the universe. However, you hadn’t ever actually been to one, although you almost would’ve if you hadn’t gotten grounded before a class trip, resulting in all of your friends going to a planetarium show without you. You remembered Yizhuo was texting you throughout the entire trip, complaining about virtually everything that was going on and telling you how much she missed you.
“You’re kidding,” Heeseung’s eyes went round. “No way! You’ve never been to a planetarium?”
“Well—”
“Oh my god,” he continued, absolutely astounded. “Have you even lived?”
“I’ve just never had the chance!” you argued. “It’s not like anyone’s ever asked me to go to one. Plus, if there’s anyone I’d go with, I’d rather just go with you.”
Silence.
You and Heeseung had been settling into a lot of awkward pauses lately. It always followed some odd comment or action between you two, like when he got extremely close to you on the yacht. You still had no idea what exactly his intentions were during that whole ordeal, but your heart had never raced so fast.
Eventually, your silence was broken by an employee ushering you and Heeseung to walk past the velvet ropes and into the observatory building. You both were still silent upon walking in, but when you saw the signs pointing to the planetarium, you nudged your best friend’s side.
“It says the next showing starts in five minutes,” you pointed out.
“Fuck.” He slapped the pockets of his jeans, feeling for something solid in them. “I have my tickets—somewhere. Give me a second.”
Thankfully, he managed to figure out that he saved his tickets to his Apple Wallet. The sign stating that the shows were sold out nearly made your heart drop, but, of course, Heeseung had planned this out well in advance.
As always.
“Where should we sit?” you asked when you walked into the room, looking up at the dome-shaped ceiling in awe.
“Anywhere.” Heeseung grinned at you. “All we have to do is lay back and stare at the sky, so wherever you wanna sit.”
You both settled with two seats in the middle. It was smack dab in the center of the dome, right where the screen curved. Heeseung made a comment about how this was the ideal spot because it felt like you were getting sucked in by the stars.
When the show started, you gazed up at the screen in complete awe. Swirling nebulas and galaxies were painted across the night sky, blinking down at you. The narrator’s soothing voice made you feel absolutely immersed, and you had to grab the arm rest whenever the animation started speeding through the universe.
Heeseung booed when they showed Earth, throwing up a thumbs-down and then quickly shoving his hand back into his pocket, as if the planet would take offense.
And you realized you were in love with him.
You didn’t know why it hit you right then and there—a person droning on about space overhead, glancing over at your best friend to see him gawking at the solar system—but you were certain you would never feel this way with anyone else again. The feeling stampeded through your body, making your blood rush and your bones feel light. You were engulfed in a fire that burned only for Heeseung.
It felt so simple, yet all the more complicated. You were in love with your childhood best friend—the person who had been with you through everything.
It wasn’t like fireworks. Not a splash of ice cold water or like you had been kicked in the chest. It was more like slowly sinking in quicksand, not even realizing how deep you were until you were completely submerged.
You had been in love with Golden Boy for a long time now.
Later, after the show was over, he took you outside to overlook the city. Apparently, it was quite the sight to behold from this high up. You were still gushing on and on about the planetarium show, but as soon as you took a glance over the railing, you forgot all about the wonders of space.
Now, looking over all the bright lights really made it feel like the City of Angels. You were completely captivated by the sight. It was different from how it looked from the hot air balloon; everything was so miniscule from that height, but you could see how far the city stretched from here. The lights blinked past the horizon, and you were certain this was your first time seeing stars down below instead up in the sky.
Heeseung folded his arms onto the railing and tucked his head in them. “You can’t get this view anywhere else.”
“It’s beautiful,” you said, hardly audible.
“Yeah,” he replied. You wondered if he was talking about the stars above or the city below, so you turned your head to catch where he was looking. There was an alarming spike in your heartbeat when you realized he was looking at you, but Heeseung didn’t look away this time. “It really is.”
You never fully appreciated how gorgeous Los Angeles—never really looked past all the traffic and smog and crowd. The bustling city was tiring to keep up with at times. You saw it more as the city of burnouts than the city of stars.
But here, where the stars weren’t in the sky but down below, you realized that the brightest star of them all was the one right next to you.
It was Heeseung.
“You don’t still wish you were in the Bahamas, do you?” he asked suddenly, which spurred you to start laughing.
You stared up at him with incredulity in your eyes. “Hee, I never once wished I was in the Bahamas when I was with you.” You nodded to yourself. “I’d say you made this a successful summer.”
Your heart flipped in your chest when you saw those gleaming eyes and bright smile of his. It almost lit up the sky brighter than the city of Los Angeles itself. The way he was looking at you made you forget everything you were saying.
“Actually,” he started shyly, “there's something else that could make this summer perfect.”
“What’s that?”
“Will you go out with me?”
The question knocked you off orbit, electrifying every nerve in your body like it was cut wire. You weren’t sure what expression you wore on your face, but the shy look on Heeseung’s face was plunging you deeper in that inescapable quicksand. Of course, your friends had suspected this all along, but hearing it yourself was entirely different. You felt like you were glowing brighter than Polaris.
“I’ve liked you since we were kids,” he started to explain after gauging that you still needed time to process his words. “It’s not like I just felt this way overnight. I was just trying to make the right choices so that I could stay by your side for as long as I could. I mean, I’ll always be your best friend, Y/N, but I also wanna be something more than that to you.”
“And it’s okay if you don’t feel the same way,” he continued. “I knew that this could possibly ruin our friendship, but I also knew that if I didn’t tell you how I felt, then I would’ve been lying to you through college, too.” He sucked in a shuddering breath. “It’s only ever been you.”
Change was hard. You’d been at war with your mind for a while now over starting something new with Heeseung. Although it was unfamiliar and new, and although you were scared of things potentially not working out, you still wanted to try for him.
“You don’t have to worry about ruining our friendship.” The words were on your tongue like a pearl. Your soul leaked out of your body, straight into the Earth, then seeped back into you with newfound bravery. You blinked back tears that dared to spill and sounded so stupidly breathless when you confessed, “I’m in love with you, too, Hee.”
His eyes were as wide as saucers, unblinking. “You are?”
His voice was soft, imploring, almost desperate, so you stepped closer and cupped his cold cheeks with your warm hands. Heeseung’s gaze seemed faraway, but he placed his hands over yours, as if he was trying to make sure you were real.
“I don’t think there’s anyone else out there who would rent an entire hot air balloon just to make sure I wouldn’t miss the Bahamas.” You laughed, a moonstruck grin on your face. “And, for the record, I’d choose you over a stupid vacation any day.”
You had been waiting to see his face break into that dazzling smile of his where his eyes crinkled at the corners. Instead, Heeseung just gazed at you longingly before he placed a hand on your cheek and bent down to kiss you.
His mouth moved with yours carefully, almost like he was too scared to go any further. You moved your hands to loop around his neck, drawing him closer so that you could slowly deepen the kiss. You were grateful that Heeseung waited to match your pace, and soon he was dropping his hands to grab at your waist and pull you closer to him, too. It sent butterflies straight to the pit of your stomach whenever he smiled between kisses, mumbling something about how pretty you were or how he had been waiting to do this forever.
Sometimes, you realized, feelings didn’t need to be expressed through words. You didn’t need the confirmation because with Heeseung’s lips pressed to yours, you felt like you were glowing brighter than the stars above.
You supposed you could say your parents were a little shocked to come back home and discover a major change in your relationship status.
You had to give them the rundown of what happened, of course. It wasn’t very hard to do, considering you had reiterated the same story to Yizhuo about a hundred times until she was satisfied. Thankfully, your other friends just needed to hear it once to fully grasp that Heeseung was now your boyfriend. For Yeji, you had to bring out a whiteboard just to draw everything out to her over FaceTime.
As you broke down what happened while your parents were in Rome, you noticed the silver necklace on your mother’s neck that glimmered whenever the light caught it. You smiled to yourself when you realized it was probably your stepfather’s honeymoon present, and you were grateful that your mother was able to experience such a wonderful love herself.
“See?” There was an excited gleam in your mother’s eyes as she bit into one of the chocolate chip cookies you and Heeseung made for them last night. She pointed the cookie in your stepfather’s direction. “I told you they’d get together!”
“I thought so, too!” he agreed. “That’s why I had that little talk with Heeseung when you two dropped us off at the airport.”
“That’s what you guys were talking about?!” you exclaimed, jumping up to your feet and then sinking back down in your seat with your hands covering your face. “I knew it was gonna be something embarrassing.”
“Oh, honey, don’t say that. Have a cookie.”
“Thanks, Mom,” Heeseung, who had been silent the whole conversation, spoke up. He reached over and took the cookie from your mother, but you smacked his hand lightly while he was bringing it to his mouth. “Hey! You almost made me drop my cookie!”
You huffed. “She was talking to me, idiot.”
You were honestly over-the-moon that dating Heeseung was this easy. You worried about having a boyfriend and having to go through the hassle of introducing him to your parents and waiting for them to warm up to him. With Heeseung, though, he was already like family in your household, so nothing felt too different.
Except that your parents could outwardly tease you both now.
Since you were in his parents’ good graces, too, everything seemed to click for you two. Both of your parents were planning to go out for dinner sometime this week to celebrate your new relationship, which you felt was a little over-the-top. You suspected that Mrs. Lee was hoping you would be her future daughter-in-law.
They were even planning on renting a Airbnb together for yours and Heeseung’s move-in at Yale. It was almost terrifying how everyone in your life seemed to be fully on-board for this relationship.
Not that you were complaining, though.
“Are you guys going somewhere now?” your mother asked, eyeing Heeseung’s white button-up that you were wearing over your swimsuit. “Make sure you wear sunscreen. It’s supposed to be the hottest day of the year.”
You checked your bag to make sure your sunscreen was, in fact, there. Heeseung took his baseball cap off to put it on your head, which made you crack a smile.
“Yeah, we’re going to the beach,” you said. “Yizhuo and Chenle wanted to spend the day at Santa Monica, and then we were gonna head over to Jungwon’s house.”
“Well, have fun.” Your mother moved to the kitchen to grab Tupperware to package the cookies. Your stepfather followed her in to help her out. “I’m sorry we couldn’t go to the Bahamas this year, but the beach has to be the next best thing, right?”
You shared a grin with Heeseung, and his eyes crinkled beautifully at the corners. “Yeah, it’s exactly like the Bahamas if I close my eyes.”
AUTHOR’S NOTE ▸ thank you for reading all the way to the end if you made it this far !! :’) i have always wanted to write pure fluff without any room for misunderstandings or angst LOL and heeseung is just the perfect embodiment of bff2l ♡ i hope you enjoyed reading this as much as i enjoyed writing this !!
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#enhypen imagines#heeseung imagines#heeseung fluff#enhypen fluff#heeseung x reader#enhypen oneshots#heeseung oneshots#lee heeseung#enhypen
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Glimpse Of Us | Spencer Reid x F! Reader
(Full oneshot posted here. Link to my masterlist for everything else I’ve posted!)
- - - - -
"What's wrong honey?" She asks him, running a comforting hand up his arm. Shaking the thoughts of you from his mind, Spencer smiles down to her with guilt creeping up within him.
"Just had a bad day." Is all he tells her. For he can never tell her the truth, that he'll never love her the way he loved you. It wouldn't be right, and none of it is her fault.
He doesn't see the need to tell her he's only passing time in her arms, the ones that will never hold him the way he needs.
- - - - -
His fingers find the velvet box in his pocket and he opens it. The ring inside is divine, he had it created just for you. The gemstone in the center reflects the warm light of his apartment beautifully as he admires it.
He can't help but to imagine what it would look like on your finger, where it belongs.
#spencer reid fluff#spencer x reader#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid oneshot#spencer reid angst#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fanfic#dr spencer reid#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds fanfic#criminal minds#joji inspired#joji#mgg#spencer reid x you#spencer reid
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GENSHIN MEN & SHOWING YOU THEIR LOVE !
characters. xiao zhongli kaeya diluc childe neuvillette wriothesley x reader
genre. romantic fluff!!
an. i made a part 1 a looong time ago but it's time for another round of how deep is your love how deep is yooour loooove | please reblog!! im getting back into writing and reblogs with tags and comments will make me want to write more :D
xiao
xiao, who shows his love to you by silently leaving items that you mentioned that you like on your bedside stand, so that you have something to be happy about once you wake up. some days it's a bundle of qingxins or silk flowers, and other days, a bag of salty snacks from chef mao's kitchen. thank him by wrapping your arms around him, and whisper in joyful gratitude.
zhongli
zhongli, who shows his love to you by subtly acknowledging your presence in his life whenever he's talking to someone. a quiet nod in your direction whenever someone asks about any of his achievements is a common reoccurence, with a soft smile on his face as well. it's a sweet thing, almost like a shared little secret between the both of you.
diluc
diluc, who shows his love to you by making sure that he's on time when picking you up from work. he always gets there five to ten minutes earlier, so that he can pick up your favourite pastry from the cafe next door. it's a sweet thing, diluc's love – hold it close and treasure it, because he will never give this love that he gives you to anyone else.
kaeya
kaeya, who shows his love to you by continuously texting you throughout the day. the sweet reminder that you're always on his mind makes you smile with each notification lighting up your phone screen. a groan escapes your lips as he sends you a sweet message that reads, "reminded me of you, xoxo! miss you!". sweet, isn't it? attached to it is a picture of his work bathroom.
childe
childe, who shows his love to you by listening to your shared playlist with him throughout the day. laufey, beadadoobee, adam melchor, joji, and more are beats constantly pumping him through the day. he sends you screenshotted and annotated lyrics of your favourite songs, highlighting the word "love" over and over again.
neuvillette
neuvillette, who shows his love to you by remembering the little things that you like. it might be that small bakery in the north of fontaine, or that spot with the bunch of pretty flowers that you took him to once. if you love something, he remembers – it's an unforgettable kind of love, and it's the kind of love that makes you fall in love with neuvillette over and over again.
wriothesley
wriothesley, who shows his love to you by choosing to come home every single day after a long day of work at the fortress. he's weary and he shuffles his feet back to the door of your – but he doesn't care, because he's home. seeing your face light up once you see him reminds him of why he chooses to commute an hour just to get to the fortress and home, instead of staying at the fortress.
taglist: @tiredsleep @loptido @raincxtter @chichikoi @ladyadii @soulsanta @sheiiths @genshinparty @eowinthetraveler @moonbyunniee @legitnoi @lemontum @manager-of-the-pudding-bank @starz222 @ilyuu @cherry-colored-petals @mondaymelon @tartaglia-apologist @soleillunne @m1shapanda @aimynx @smokipoki @adeptuscharm @diorlumx @vennnnn-diagram @ryuryuryuyurboat @yuminako @st0pthatsgay @aqualesha @sixtynintharchon @supernova25 @kunikuda-simp @starglitterz @rin-nyrasti-writes @mxyarylla (send ask/comment to be added to taglist)
reblogs w/ tags & comments help me lots !!! if you liked this, consider dropping me a follow as well :-)
#astronetwrk#[📝 stewardess' notepad!]#genshin x reader#genshin impact x reader#xiao x reader#diluc x reader#childe x reader#kaeya x reader#kaeya fluff#diluc fluff#childe fluff#genshin x gn reader#genshin impact x gn reader#genshin fluff#domestic fluff#xiao x gn reader#kaeya x gn reader#diluc x gn reader#childe x gn reader#zhongli x reader#zhongli x gn reader#zhongli fluff#neuvillette x reader#neuvillette x gn reader#neuvillette fluff#wriothesley x reader#wriothesley x gn reader#wriothesley fluff
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Hi hi! Could you possibly write more angst? (Any member) Like the mini ones (?) Like fights/arguments and whatnot :)) w fluff at the end (or ending of your choice :P) thank you!!! Love your writing!! <3
fights with seventeen | OT13
I'm SO sorry about being so late with this, but I've been really busy with my exams and I didn't have that much time to write. But now that my vacation began, I'm going to catch up with my requests. Still, I hope you enjoy this one <3
☾₊ ⊹ currently playing: a glimpse of us by joji
𓆩♡𓆪 CHOI SEUNGCHEOL
Of course you’d fight over small things, like in every relationship, but big fights are a very rare occurrence in your relationship. Seungcheol hates seeing you upset, so often those arguments will be over before they even begin.
But if you got into a big fight, it would get loud and messy. Seungcheol is competitive and stubborn, so if he gets fixated on one thing it can be hard to change his mind about it.
If you ever leave the house after a fight, he’ll become a worried mess. He'll call everyone he knows that you might have gone to and if none of them knows where you are he’ll be panicking massively. Don’t ever do that to him, no matter how angry you are at each other at that moment, he can’t stand the thought that you might get hurt and he will not be able to help you.
Would never allow you to sleep on the couch after a fight and even if you’d do that, he’d carry you back to the bedroom.
He’d blame himself for days if you ever cry during a fight, no matter whose fault it was, he’d always blame himself for making you cry.
𓆩♡𓆪 YOON JEONGHAN
Some fights would get you raising your voices at each other, but those types of arguments would be VERY rare and only happen if either of you were very tired or drained from any type of work or schedules.
Normally, neither him nor you would be able to raise your voices at each other, the fight in itself was painful enough, you didn’t need any screaming or yelling.
Both of you would try to explain your point of views, what you think the other did wrong or how they could improve themselves. You’d both be very respectful of each other’s opinions and never make fun or tease in situations like those.
Even during the argument, he’d want to hold your hand or at least be near you. He’d still want to feel connected to you and not put extra space between you. After the fight he’d also stay near you, hug you a lot and never let go of your hand.
𓆩♡𓆪 HONG JOSHUA
Your fights would be very mature and calm. Surely, you would get frustrated and annoyed at each other, but never truly angry or furious. He would never even let you.
You would resolve any of your arguments as quickly as you could, not even once thinking about giving each other the silent treatment. Even if he was away on tour, he’d try to talk to you as soon as possible or even text you, to let you know that he’d want to figure stuff out.
Sometimes, especially if it was more of a small argument, he’d be petty and annoying with you, knowing how to push your buttons, to make you more frustrated. But he would never take it too far, he’d just simply want to tease you a bit.
Knowing that you need some kind of reassurance after a fight, he’d always hug you tightly, kissing the side of your head, where there would be no place for any teasing. He would be very gentle with you then.
𓆩♡𓆪 WEN JUNHUI
In the beginning of your relationship he’d have a bit of trouble talking things out, as he never knew whether you wanted space or not. He was always too scared to ask, since he didn’t want to make things even worse between you.
With time though, you’d learn how to properly talk with each other about those kinds of stuff and your communication skills would only get better and better.
Still, any fights that you’d have would be very calm and neither of you would raise your voices at each other. If, for some reason, you’d get so angry that you’d want to say some hurtful things, you’d just take a break and spend some time apart, trying to collect your thoughts and think about how to solve the fight without hurting the other one.
The aftermath of any fight would be full of love and reassurance - warm hugs and sweet kisses.
𓆩♡𓆪 KWON SOONYOUNG
He’d get so emotional the second he figured you were actually having a fight. Especially during those big fights, that happened once in a blue moon, but still. He would be so torn, because on one hand he’s angry with you, but on the second IT’S YOU, how can he be angry with YOU?
He would probably say whatever came to his mind, not really paying attention to what was coming out of his mouth, which sometimes would do more harm than good. He would apologise right after he released what he’d said, and I'm sure he'd keep on apologising for the next few days, feeling extremely guilty.
After the argument, he would want you to hug him and keep him close to you, letting him know that you’re not upset with him anymore and that you still love him. He would also be clinging to you even more, trying to find comfort in your arms.
𓆩♡𓆪 JEON WONWOO
He is usually quite silent during your fights and you’d be the one who does most of the talking. He’d just simply nod to everything you say and share his view when you’re done.
Never raises his voice at you, no matter how angry or frustrated he is with you. Even after a tiring day, he’d listen to all of your complaints and try to work things out before going to bed. He can’t imagine sleeping without holding you in some way, and he knows that if you two don’t talk it out, you’d probably want to be left alone.
It’s hard for him to actually apologise, but you’d know he’s sorry from his acts of service. The next day, after your fight, he’d be extra attentive to you, never leaving your side and constantly asking you if you need anything.
If you’d ask him for space he, of course, would give it to you, but would feel so lonely without you by his side. He would even try to make your favourite dish to make you feel a little bit better and even though he’d fail massively, it would still make you all warm and fuzzy inside.
𓆩♡𓆪 LEE JIHOON
Very calm, but you're not always capable of telling how he actually feels. He could be fuming inside, but you wouldn’t have known. A lot like Wonwoo, he would be mostly quiet, trying to figure out how he wants to express his emotions.
Because he’s not great with dealing with his own emotions, he would have a bit of a hard time explaining his point of view on whatever you were fighting about. Still, he would be grateful that you were so understanding, even in such a situation.
If you’d want to take the couch, he’d let you. But, sometime during the night, he would come out of your bedroom with an extra blanket to tuck you in and make sure that you’re comfortable.
The next day he would be very attentive to you, but in a silent way. He’d try to make you breakfast, do the most important chores for you, help you out in any way that he could.
𓆩♡𓆪 XU MINGHAO
Any fights or arguments with him are very calm. Even though he sometimes wants to scream out in frustration, he never does that. He knows that screaming at each other won’t help out in any way.
His top one priority is to talk it out as soon as you both are ready, without getting more upset with each other. He just wants to get it over with and get back to normal.
I can see him holding your hand while you talk it out. He wants to stay connected to you and give you a kind of reassurance, that even though you're upset with each other, he’s still there for you and loves you no matter what.
The night after a fight is kind of silent. But not uncomfortable. You’re just very soft and careful around each other, not saying much, but still being in each other’s presence. You cuddle closely that night and exchange some comforting kisses as apologies.
𓆩♡𓆪 KIM MINGYU
Will either behave like a diva and drama queen or like a pouty child. It all depends on the situation, on whose fault it is and how emotionally he’s feeling. If he’s drained and tired, he won’t have the energy to fight with you and would want to resolve it as quickly as possible.
But, when he’s feeling like the usual him, the fights tend to get a bit bigger and emotional. He is stubborn, to the point where he’ll keep fighting with you even when he knows he’s wrong. Will constantly side eye you and sigh time and time again.
If he ever sees that you're getting really upset about the fight he will stop, though. There is nothing worse for him than seeing you so drained and sad and he’ll even apologise first, even when it’s your fault. He just doesn’t want to let such petty and little things come in the way of your happiness.
Even when you fall asleep still a bit angry with him, he’ll still cuddle you (or he would be touching you in some way, he just has to).
𓆩♡𓆪 LEE SEOKMIN
I’m sorry, but there is no way you could have a big fight with this man. The second he sees you getting upset or angry over something he has done, he’ll talk to you immediately.
Can get a bit emotional during fighting sometimes, but he never does that to manipulate you in some way. He just can’t stand the fact that you’re actually upset with each other.
Never raises his voice at you, never gets petty with you, NO silent treatments whatsoever. He doesn’t understand how someone can ignore their partner when they're upset with them. Why not simply talk things out and get back to normal? Every second spent on fighting, means less time to spend it on how you’re actually meant to spend it - happy and having fun!
Will always gives you a lot of hugs and cuddles after a fight, maybe not necessarily to cheer you up, but to reassure himself that you’re not going anywhere and to let you know how much he appreciates you.
𓆩♡𓆪 BOO SEUNGKWAN
So dramatic. So petty. So over the top.
He would be rambling non stop, not letting you speak. He would let out all of his frustrations and annoyances in no time, it would leave him almost breathless. After that, he’d listen to you and do his best to understand your point of view.
Big fights wouldn’t really happen in your relationship, as both of you would get too emotional and start crying and apologising upon seeing each other's sad faces. Still, you’d talk it out and never leave an argument unresolved.
He’d need reassurance after any kind of fight, big or small. It would make him worry that you might want to take a break from him or even break up and that’s when you’d have to tell him that you’d never leave him because of a silly fight.
After one of those silly small fights, you’d laugh about it afterwards, realising how stupid you both were to fight over something so insignificant.
𓆩♡𓆪 CHWE VERNON
He’d be very logical and reasonable during any of your fights, though I can’t really imagine any big fights happening between the two of you. You’d try to avoid any conflicts and always talk things out before they escalate.
If, for any reason, you’d want to sleep on the couch, he’d tell you to sleep in your bed and that he’d take the couch instead. You’d probably wake up sometime during the night and walk out to the living room wrapped in a blanket, laying down next to him.
There are no silent treatments with this dude, he’ll never let you ignore him when you’re angry. As passive as he usually is, he just can’t stand you ignoring him, especially when he doesn;t know what he has done to upset you.
Usually, you watch a movie after a fight to calm yourselves a bit and give each other some time to think, but still be in each other's presence.
𓆩♡𓆪 LEE CHAN
Please don’t fight with him. He’s always so soft spoken with you and it doesn’t change even when you fight. He absolutely hates fighting with you - hates the fact that he can’t hug you, hates that you’re angry and upset. He’ll do everything to make it right again.
There is a big chance that he’ll even cry during a big fight, especially when you both say things that you don’t really mean. He’s already mentally tired from all his schedules and he can’t stand the fact that he can’t find comfort in the person that he loves the most.
Similarly to Seungcheol, he will never let you take the couch and will never let you leave the house. He’s simply too scared that you might leave him or that something might happen to you and he wouldn’t be able to cope with that.
Even when you fall asleep still angry with each other, during the night, you’ll find your way back to him, cuddling into him.
#seventeen#seventeen imagines#seventeen reactions#seventeen x you#seventeen x reader#svt reactions#seventeen fluff#seventeen headcanons#svt headcanons#svt seungcheol#seungcheol x reader#seungcheol fluff#seventeen seungcheol#yoon jeonghan#jeonghan x reader#jeonghan#jeonghan x you#svt jeonghan#jeonghan fluff#jeonghan headcanons#svt joshua#joshua fluff#joshua x you#joshua x reader#jun fluff#mingyu fluff#minghao imagines#dino fluff#woozi imagines#seventeen angst
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HARRY POTTER MASTERLIST ் ༘
[ ↷ m. masterlist ]
[ ❏ legend , ]
✿ fluff ! ☁︎ angst ! ★ smut !
♥︎ personal favorite ! ✓ complete !
ᝰ currently writing !
marauders era ──
❛ james potter ❜
𓄼 oneshots 𓄹
ᝰ | tell me that i'm all you want:
( afterglow, taylor swift )
☁︎✿
IN WHICH lily's sudden attraction to james has him thrown for a loop, and you're not sure if you have his heart any longer
ᝰ | been about three years since i dated you:
( broken clocks, sza )
☁︎✿
IN WHICH your breakup with james was already beginning to hit its three year mark when he shows up at your doorstep
𓄼 mini-fics 𓄹
tba
❛ sirius black ❜
𓄼 oneshots 𓄹
✓ | i can't lose when i'm with you:
( snooze, sza )
✿
IN WHICH sirius is so desperately in love with you, and the rest of the marauders help him execute his extravagant plan to ask you out
ᝰ | i'm so proud i got to love you once:
( sugarplum elegy, niki )
☁︎
IN WHICH it's the first wizarding war and you're visiting your ex, sirius, in his apartment
𓄼 mini-fics 𓄹
tba
❛ remus lupin ❜
𓄼 oneshots 𓄹
ᝰ | i can't stop thinkin' 'bout you:
( thinkin bout you, katie )
✿
IN WHICH your little hallway crush on one of the infamous marauders, remus lupin, turns into something more
ᝰ | do you feel the love?:
( double take, dhruv )
☁︎✿
IN WHICH remus is as oblivious as they come, and you're tired of dropping all those hints that never get picked up
𓄼 mini-fics 𓄹
tba
❛ regulus black ❜
𓄼 oneshots 𓄹
✓ | she's all i wanna be so bad:
↳ ✓ | how could i ever compete with that?
( she's all i wanna be, tate mcrae )
☁︎
IN WHICH being best friends with regulus black isn't all that great, especially when your feelings get thrown away for some new transfer student from beauxbatons
ᝰ | i've spent the night crying on the floor of my bathroom:
( good 4 u, olivia rodrigo )
✿
IN WHICH your breakup with your best friend's brother leaves you sobbing in the bathroom, and you're not as quiet as you think you are when regulus bursts in
𓄼 mini-fics 𓄹
tba
lightning era ──
❛ harry potter ❜
𓄼 oneshots 𓄹
ᝰ | i'll keep it a secret:
( secret, stemo & rich kim )
✿
IN WHICH you tell harry about a little crush you have
ᝰ | why you gotta be like that?:
( y u gotta b like that, audrey mika )
☁︎
IN WHICH it's nearing the yule ball, and harry completely disregards your existence . . . like he always does
𓄼 mini-fics 𓄹
tba
❛ fred weasley ❜
𓄼 oneshots 𓄹
ᝰ | i'll disconnect and keep the heart safe:
( love is (not) easy, chase atlantic )
☁︎
IN WHICH fred, as always, flirts with you, his best friend, and you can't take it anymore
ᝰ | don't be dishonest:
( don't, bryson tiller )
☁︎✿
IN WHICH you've barely just picked up the pieces of your heart and pieced them back together, and when word gets out that you like fred, it all falls apart once again
𓄼 mini-fics 𓄹
tba
❛ george weasley ❜
𓄼 oneshots 𓄹
ᝰ | burning photos:
( die for you, joji )
☁︎
IN WHICH george broke up with you for angelina after fred's death, and you're finally beginning to let go of him
ᝰ | i need love and affection:
( loveeeeeee song, rihanna & future )
✿
IN WHICH george has been a bit distant recently, with preparations for his joke shop with fred, and you ask for just a bit more attention
𓄼 mini-fics 𓄹
ᝰ | you ain't my boyfriend:
( boyfriend, ariana grande & social house )
☁︎✿
IN WHICH both you and george need a little help getting your crushes jealous, so you turn to each other for assistance
❛ draco malfoy ❜
𓄼 oneshots 𓄹
ᝰ | i can give you love for free:
( escort, chase atlantic )
✿
IN WHICH draco's incessant teasing has an underlying motive
ᝰ | so long as we keep this lowkey:
( lowkey, niki )
☁︎✿
IN WHICH draco asks you to keep your newly established relationship under wraps from his parents and friends, and you're fine with it until it finally clicks
𓄼 mini-fics 𓄹
tba
❛ mattheo riddle ❜
𓄼 oneshots 𓄹
ᝰ | tell me that you love me and prove it:
( 7pm, lizzy mcalpine & lilacs. )
☁︎✿
IN WHICH you begin to toss and turn at mattheo's newfound fondness of toxicity towards you and your relationship, and the sight of him with another girl is the final straw
ᝰ | maybe this is just lies:
( love affair, umi )
☁︎
IN WHICH your dynamic with mattheo is built off of what you believe is trust, but what he knows as lies
𓄼 mini-fics 𓄹
tba
❛ theodore nott ❜
𓄼 oneshots 𓄹
ᝰ | she said "don't get too attached":
( heaven sent, tevomxntana )
☁︎
IN WHICH theodore begins to fall for you and your witty and sarcastic personality, but when you told him to not get attached, you meant it
ᝰ | chase two girls, lose the one:
( cardigan, taylor swift )
☁︎✿
IN WHICH you're one of the two girls that theodore can't keep his eyes, hands, nor mind off of, but as they say, "chase two girls, lose the one"
𓄼 mini-fics 𓄹
tba
❛ others ❜
𓄼 oneshots 𓄹
tba
𓄼 mini-fics 𓄹
tba
#harry potter#hogwarts#gryffindor#hufflepuff#ravenclaw#slytherin#harry potter x reader#draco malfoy#draco malfoy x reader#fred weasley#fred weasley x reader#george weasley#george weasley x reader#mattheo riddle#mattheo riddle x reader#james potter#james potter x reader#sirius black#sirius black x reader#remus lupin#remus lupin x reader#regulus black#regulus black x reader#theodore nott#theodore nott x reader#james potter x y/n#remus lupin x y/n#sirius black x y/n#regulus black x y/n#harry potter x y/n
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