#incorrectmcu
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Sam and Bucky during an Avengers karaoke competition when it’s their turn:
Sam: Buck, we’re up. Let’s go.
Bucky: Hell no! I’m not even that good of a singer anyway.
AJ, who is there with Cass and Sarah: That’s not true! We hear you singing in the shower all the time, Uncle Bucky!
Bucky: Boys, why are you peeping into the shower? You know it’s not a polite thing to do.
Cass: Oh, we don’t need to do that. Your voice carries and we can hear you in our room.
Bucky, facepalming and muttering: God dammit!
Sam, smirking in the corner: You heard the boys! Come on! Let’s go, buddy!
Bucky, muttering: I hate you.
Sam: Love you too, Buck!
Bucky flips him off.
Sam: There are children present! And I’m not just talking about AJ and Cass! *motions over towards Shuri, Peter, and the rest of the youngsters*
Bucky: Does it look like I care right now?
Shuri, from her spot at a table: I have taught him well! Your time in Wakanda has done you good, Sergeant!
Bucky: Thank you, Shuri! At least someone agrees with me!
Sam makes a face.
Yelena, from out of nowhere: Can you two please continue your gay love affair somewhere else? We want to hear singing and I don’t hear any!
#incorrect sam wilson#incorrect bucky barnes#sambucky#sam wilson#bucky barnes#incorrect marvel quotes#incorrectmcu#mcu#shuri#yelena belova#incorrect avengers
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Peter: So what if he wins again?
Steve: We suck it up, I guess.
Bucky, cleaning his favorite shotgun: Not my first president, won't be my last.
#marvel#mcu#spiderman#incorrectmcu#incorrect bucky barnes#incorrect peter parker#incorrect marvel#incorrect marvel quotes#incorrect steve rogers#wintersoldier#captain america#steve rogers#peterparker#peter parker#go vote#vote
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stony pt.1
natasha: so i took those secret pictures of steve’s ass that you asked for, do you want-
tony: sAY LESS
credits: me :)
#tonystark#tony#mcu#marvel incorrect quotes#incorrect stony#incorrect tony stark#incorrectmcu#marvel#incorrectmarvel#marvel cinematic universe#616 stony#ship: stony#stony#natasha#natasha romanoff
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Sam: You know what? You... you guys should date.
Sam: and then not tell me about it.
Bucky, whispering to Nat: I think he knows.
#avengers#au#funny#marvel#natasharomanoff#natalia romanova#buckybarnes#buckyxnat#buckynat#natbucky#samwilson#falcon#wintersoldier#blackwidow#incorrect#incorrectmarvel#incorrectmcu#incorrectbuckynat
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Harley: So... *nervous laugh*
Liz: *staring* um wot?
Harley: Yeah...?
Liz: *staring I’m utmost disbelief -srsly it was pouring out of her pores* You-
Harley: *nods*
Liz: *breathes in and out* You breaking up with for my freaking ex?!!?
Harley: ... ye?
Liz: Oh my god
Peter: it be like that sometimes Liz, it be like that sometimes
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Peter: Mr. Stark, I don’t feel so good.
Tony: *in panic and having horrible flashbacks* No, no kid talk to me what’s wrong what’s going on?!?
Peter: Well I can only breathe out of my left nostril so I’m kinda suffering right now.
#infinity war#avengers endgame#incorrect avengers#incorrect avengers quotes#incorrect peter parker#incorrect spiderman#spiderverse#spiderman#marvel mcu#incorrectmcu#avengers#incorrect marvel quotes#marvel#peter parker#iron man#incorrect ironman#incorrect irondad and spiderson#incorrect irondad quotes#irondad#irondad and spiderson
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Sam, eating noodles: *slurps*
Bucky: That is so annoying what the hell.
Sam: *slurping intensifies*
Bucky: I hate you.
#marvel #mcu #incorrectmcu #incorrectmarvel #falconandthewintersoldier #samwilson #buckybarnes #falcon #bucky #thewintersoldier
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tony (sadly): I don't have the financial stability to adopt all these rocks
rhodey: you're a literal billionaire????
pepper: ... it's a rock
#marvel#tony stark#pepper potts#james rhodes#mcu#incorrect quotes#incorrecttonystark#pepperony#tonyrhodey#ironhusbands#iron man#iron fam#team iron man#im#incorrectmarvel#incorrectmcu#marvel crack#based on a snapchat my sister sent me#she is occasionally funny#incorrect marvel quotes#my post
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Shopping for an Avengers party at HQ
Yelena: I’m telling you, Kate Bishop. There are dresses with pockets here in this store! How else are people supposed to carry everything they need?
Kate: Where? I see none of them!
The two of them walk around the store. Yelena feels the sides of all the dresses until she finally finds a dark blue off the shoulder formal dress with pockets. She lights up in glee, grabbing it off the rack.
Kate: Ok. Looks like I spoke too soon.
Yelena: I will be starting a trend at this party. Mark my words, Kate Bishop!
Kate: *raises her hands up in surrender* If you say so.
#incorrectmcu#incorrect avengers#incorrect yelena belova#incorrect kate bishop#yelena belova#kate bishop#black widow#hawkeye#mcu#incorrect marvel quotes
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Jane is walking around Valhalla when she runs into Loki…
Jane: *slaps Loki again*
Loki, unsurprised: What did I do this time?
Jane: Nothing. Just wanted to do it for the hell of it.
Loki: Understood.
#incorrectmcu#incorrect loki laufeyson#incorrect jane foster#incorrect marvel quotes#jane foster#loki#thor love and thunder#mcu
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*Nebula gets some paper out*
Rocket: *turns around and groans* Oh God, not that damn paper football game again!
Mantis: What’s wrong with paper football? It’s a great game!
Rocket: No, it’s not! Quill and I don’t play because every time we do, she wins! Groot doesn’t understand it and Drax only plays so he can purposely miss and yell the word goal repeatedly, which annoys the hell out of me!
Drax: *raises his arms up from his seat* Goal! *receives eyeroll from Rocket and Nebula* Goal! *silence* What? You said to yell the word goal repeatedly!
Rocket, muttering: God, help me.
#incorrectmcu#incorrect guardians of the galaxy#rocket raccoon#mantis#drax the destroyer#nebula#guardians of the galaxy#mcu#incorrect marvel quotes
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2023, Pre-Battle of Earth
Sam, over the comms: Strange, I’ve got a request for you.
Dr. Strange: What is it, Wilson?
Sam: Can you make sure to open the Wakanda portal on Steve’s left?
Strange: Why?
Sam: It’s an inside joke the two of us have. It’ll all make sense when it happens.
Strange, after a minute of comprehension: You got it, Wilson.
#incorrectmcu#incorrect avengers#incorrect sam wilson#incorrect stephen strange#sam wilson#stephen strange#doctor strange#falcon#avengers endgame#mcu
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Tony: Why- why was the fucking house on FUCKING FIRE?
Peter: [Looks to the other side of the street]
Harley: [Pretends to be passed out]
Bucky, nonchalantly: There was a spider on the kitchen. Shit happens.
Tony, about to pass out: DID IT WORK?
Bucky, pointing at the bushes: It went over there so if you are that nice-
#marvel#mcu#spiderman#incorrect peter parker#peterparker#peter parker#incorrect bucky barnes#buckybarnes#bucky#harley keener#incorrectmcu#incorrect marvel#incorrect marvel quotes#incorrect tony stark#tonystark#tony stark#ironman#wintersoldier
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Bucky: Hey man, can I borrow your wings? I'm dressing up as you.
Sam, almost crying: Wait- you're really dressing up as Falcon?
Bucky: No I'm dressing up as a clown.
Sam: You fucking know what-
#marvel#mcu#incorrectmcu#incorrect bucky barnes#incorrect marvel#incorrect marvel quotes#incorrect sam wilson#samwilson#sam wilson#the falcon and the winter soldier#falcon#buckybarnes#bucky#wintersoldier
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Tony, putting on his mask: Why do I have to wear a mask every time I go out?
Peter: So you don't get other people sick.
Pepper: So you give a good image to the company.
Steve: Because it is mandatory.
Bucky, without looking up from his Lucky Charms: So no one gets to see your ugly ass face.
#incorrect bucky barnes#incorrect marvel#incorrectmcu#incorrect marvel quotes#incorrect tony stark#mcu#marvel#tony stark#steve rogers#pepper potts#bucky barnes#captain america#iron man#winter soldier
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Clint: They need me, these fuckers, they lost last time because I was away at fucking Missouri.
Tony: Uh, not really.
Steve: We were divided.
Natasha: Everyone fucked up.
Thor: And we didn't apologise properly.
Bruce: That's why we lost.
Clint, leaning over, whispering: They need me, they just won't admit it.
#marvel#mcu#incorrect marvel#incorrect tony stark#tonystark#tony stark#incorrect natasha romanoff#natasharomanoff#natasha romanoff#ironman#blackwidow#clint barton#incorrect clint barton#incorrectmcu#steve rogers#incorrect steve rogers#captain america#hawkeye#thor#bruce banner
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