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saintlaurentisms · 4 months

Note

hi my love! been obsessed with the fictional club scene recently; was wondering if you could write me a quick smutty club bathroom/dancefloor blurb!!! have fun with it, i love ya <3 :3

fulfilling the fantasy.

A/N: i had so much fun writing this, holy shit. this is dedicated to all of the harry & ashton fans in the world (and on the internet!), i see you and i believe you have taste.

gif credit.

summary: in which, you and your boyfriend go out to celebrate a successful first tour gig and the adrenaline seriously heightens emotions. ~ featuring ashton irwin of 5 seconds of summer.

content warning: smut (semi-public p-in-v sex in front of a mirror, voyeurism, threesome (???), dirty talk (degradation + praise), oral sex (male receiving), some hair pulling, daddy kink.) this work is intended for those 18+ and should be read by mature audiences only.

word count: 2.7k+ words.

The post-concert adrenaline hadn’t wavered in Harry’s veins, that much was evident. When you looked at him, all you could see was the radiance of energy and purity of happiness; evergreen in his eyes, the rose color in his lips, the blackness of ink that shone underneath the arctic hues of blue and white in the nightclub you and Harry had ventured to in the darkness of the evening. It was risky going out, especially at a time where One Direction fans were probably having their own adventure, still riding the high of seeing their favorite band perform live, but you nor Harry seemed to care.

Tonight was all about him, all about celebrating a successful first show and the beginning of the On the Road Again tour. The rest of the boys had preoccupied themselves with their own forms of fun, leaving you and Harry by yourselves. Upon entering the venue, you beelined towards the bar, your hand in Harry’s with your heads bowed to try and keep your identities a bit of a secret. You’re in the middle of ordering a round of vodka shots for you both before you feel a gentle tap on your shoulder. You turn your head to get a glance at who could have tapped you, though you’re already suspecting it was a fan.

You were wrong.

“Holy shit, Ashton?” You exclaim, eyebrows furrowing at the man in front of you. Harry’s eyes widen a bit at your words, turning his body fully to face the drummer, abandoning the bartender and the prospect of alcohol. It had been a while since you’d interacted with Ashton in person, only really communicating via text or video chat since you last saw him a year ago. Of course, it had been far longer for Harry; One Direction had 5 Seconds of Summer on tour with them in 2013 and 2014 and they all grew quite close during that time, but their communication had fizzled out due to how busy both bands became.

“I knew it was you!” Ashton grins, hazel eyes glimmering with excitement as the pair of you take each other in. The buzz of chemistry between you and the Australian was palpable – palpable enough for anyone to notice it, including Harry.

Harry’s lips twitch up into a small smile at the interaction taking place in front of him, yet an ugly, gnawing feeling in his gut is slowly beginning to grow; he knew you were attracted to Ashton when you’d met back in 2013 and that Ashton reciprocated those feelings once you both had gotten to know one another. However, you and Harry had just begun dating and knew that nothing would come of your little crush on the drummer. Still, a deep-seated insecurity nestled its way into his bones and, apparently, hadn’t quite left.

Maybe it was the adrenaline coursing through his veins, but the unsettling amount of jealousy your boyfriend was beginning to feel made his evergreen eyes go emerald; hard, darkened. “We’re celebrating tour,” Harry cuts in, instinctively wrapping an arm around your shoulders, “the first show was earlier on.”

“Yeah, I heard through the grapevine,” Ashton replies playfully, “Niall. Niall’s the grapevine. He asked if the boys and I could catch the show, but we were busy. Will you be in Australia for a bit?”

“Yes! Yeah, we’ll be in Australia. 1D has shows in Brisbane and Melbourne.” The words tumble out of your mouth and it sounds as though you’re a walking advert for your boyfriend’s band. Clearly, Ashton finds it cute because he’s chuckling at your unfiltered enthusiasm the minute you stop rambling.

“Well, it was great to see you guys. I didn’t mean to intrude.” He smiles, though his words are a slight dig at your boyfriend; Ashton could tell Harry’s guard was up and the jealousy that he exuded was crystal clear. At least, it was to him.

You, on the other hand, were too wrapped up in excitement to truly take note.

The drummer leaves you and Harry at the bar, going back into the atmosphere of the club. You spot him joining a group of friends at a table. Part of you wishes he’d stay and chat more, but the evening wasn’t about socializing, it was about basking in the glory of your popstar beau.

Everything seems to return back to normal; you turn your attention back to the bar and order that round of vodka shots for yourself and Harry. The two of you are two shots deep before his gaze falls on you, “D’you want to fuck him?”

You choke on the alcohol, sputtering slightly with wide eyes at the incredibly unexpected question. “W-What? What the fuck are you- are you talking about?” You speak between breaths, trying to regain composure. Harry wasn’t usually so direct, this only happened whenever sex was involved, so why he was so upfront confused you a bit.

“Do you want to have sex with Ashton?”

“Harry,” You look at him incredulously, “don’t be ridiculous. No, I don’t want to sleep with Ashton.”

“Don’t lie, Y/N. You’ve always fancied him, we both know that.”

“So what? I’m with you, I love you. Want you, not him. It’s just a little celebrity crush, H. You know I’d-”

“Darling,” Harry interrupts with a chuckle, amused by your immediate instinct to reassure him that you’d never entertain infidelity. He knew how committed you were to him. “S’ not what I mean. I know you wouldn’t cheat on me. M’ askin’ if you’d ever thought about fucking him.”

You weren’t sure whether to be truthful or to set aside your feelings. On one hand, he was only asking you if you’d thought about it or had ever fantasized about it, yet on the other hand, a part of you was sure that if you answered with the truth, he’d get angry with you. However, Harry had never been the type to get angry over honesty. In fact, he preached being truthful.

“I’ve… thought about it, yeah. It isn’t really a fantasy about him fucking me, though. It’s more- well, it’s more about you and him.”

Your boyfriend blinks, “A threesome?”

“Kind of? I- I guess you could describe it that way. You, uhm.. You take turns.”

At this, the popstar is silent. His eyebrows knit together as he thinks for a brief moment.

“We share you.”

You cringe at Harry’s words. The lewdness of his sentence lingers and makes you feel queasy, “When you put it like that, I sound like a slut. I hate how that sounds.”

“Baby, there’s nothin’ wrong with wanting to explore having more than one sexual partner. ‘Spose it is a threesome you’re wanting. I…” He trails off, pearly teeth nibbling at his lower lip as he starts to think deeply once more, diving head first into the depths of his head.

“Yeah?” You coax, eyebrows raising slightly.

“I’ll be honest, m’ a bit jealous about it- the idea of another man takin’ you. But, if it’s just a one time thing, I think I could be okay with it.” Harry replies sincerely, green eyes meeting your own briefly. “One night only, the two of us makin’ you ours for an evening.”

Those words go straight to your core and your brain begins to conjure up filthy images of Ashton and Harry taking turns pleasing you. Your thighs squeeze together in order to quell the heat beginning to bloom in between them. “Please?” You ask quietly, gazing up at your boyfriend with faux innocence; a little look like this tends to send Harry into dominant overdrive.

He smirks, “Text him and tell him to meet us in the bathroom, love.”

Within eight minutes, Ashton is tapping on the club’s bathroom door before swiftly entering and locking it behind him. His hazel eyes glance over at Harry, then at you. “Are you sure about this?”

You’d texted the drummer about the situation when your boyfriend had told you to, not leaving any important details out of it. It was made clear: you, Harry and Ashton, fucking in the club’s bathroom. The only opportunity you’d ever get to have both of the men you deemed incredibly fit and had the most chemistry with.

You nod confidently, “I’m sure, I promise.”

Like a switch had flipped, Ashton’s gaze meets Harry’s again, but there’s a haze in it; his once bright hazel eyes are clouded with desire. Some silent conversation is had between their eyes, maybe it’s both men agreeing to the terms – whatever it is, they both exude an aura of dominance that has your heartbeat increasing. You’ve never wanted to be on your knees this badly before.

The feeling of Harry’s lips brushing against your ear brings you out of your reverie and a short gasp leaves your lips as they trail downward and press a deep kiss to your neck. Ashton walks forward, one of his hands cupping your cheek as he brings his lips to yours, sealing your fate.

The affair becomes a blur of quick movements and kisses shared as time progresses. The soft clink of belts being unbuckled and heavy breathing fills the room when you’re finally brought down to your knees, eyes feigning innocence as you look up at Ashton. His hand is wrapped around his cock, the tip of it right at your lips.

“Go on, baby. Show Ashton how much of a good little slut y’ are.” Harry encourages you, leaning against the sink with his hand tugging slowly at his length. Without much else, your lips wrap around the drummer’s dick, your head bobbing up and down in order to take more of it in.

“Fuck,” Ashton swears through gritted teeth, his free hand weaving itself into your hair, gently guiding your movements, “so good, doll. Keep goin’ just like that for me.”

You do, you allow him to guide your movements with each tug on your hair, furthering his cock into your mouth. It’s sloppy; tears are welling in your eyes whenever he hits the back of your throat, your saliva is coating his dick and your chin. “She’s such a slut for it, Styles. Damn, you got lucky.” Ashton groans low in his throat, which makes Harry smirk.

“Bet you’re absolutely dripping, aren’t you baby? Adore being used, don’t you?” Your boyfriend taunts you, evergreen eyes watching you suck off his friend. All you can do is look at him as validation for his statement.

Ashton’s fingers wrapping in the strands of your hair becomes slightly fiercer, pulling and pushing your lips up and down his length as he chases euphoria. “Fuck, I’m close.” He warns, hazel eyes shutting as he tries his damndest to hold on for just a bit longer.

Your eyes flit towards Harry, who’s still watching you give Ashton a blowjob, his hand tugging at his cock lazily. A devilish grin has throned itself upon his lips, “Cum for her, Ash.”

The drummer’s fingers twitch momentarily, then still. A guttural groan leaves his lips as his head tilts back and his cock throbs in between your lips, emptying himself into your mouth. Eagerly, you swallow what he gives you – and it’s a lot; thick streams of cum paint your tongue white.

Ashton pulls away from you once his cock starts to soften, tucking himself back into his trousers and gently helping you up from off your knees. “That was- shit, that was really fuckin’ good.”

“I- uh.. I’m glad you enjoyed it.” You reply a bit bashfully. “Now, do you mind if Harry and I…” You trail off, hoping he’d take the hint that you wanted to be alone with your significant other.

Thankfully, he does. Ashton turns to look at himself in the mirror above the sink, straightening himself out before saying goodbye to you and Harry, then asking your boyfriend to text him. He unlocks the door and disappears into the club.

You make quick work of locking it once more, then face your boyfriend. Harry gestures you over to him and the minute you’re standing in front of him, both of his hands grip your waist. He wastes no time in undressing your lower half and bending you over the sink, one of his hands reaching to pull at your hair so your eyes are focused on your reflections in the mirror. He’s being rough, but you hadn’t expected much else; whenever he got really aroused, his dominant side would peak significantly.

“Did you like having Ashton’s dick down your throat, darling? I know you did, I can feel just how wet you are.” He teases you, the head of his length pressing up against your entrance. “I think you enjoyed it a bit too much, Y/N. D’you need to be reminded of who you belong to, baby?”

You swallow thickly, eyes meeting his through the mirror, “Yes.”

“Sorry? Didn’t quite hear you, love.”

A shaky sigh leaves your lips, “Yes, Daddy.”

The feeling of Harry’s cock stretching you out overwhelms your senses, your nails claw at the sink as he bottoms out. “Have to be quick,” He grunts as his hips start to move, thrusting in and out of your dripping pussy at an unrelenting pace, “but I’ll make damn sure you know who you belong to once m’ finished.”

You can’t speak, your lips are parted as heavy breaths and choked moans roll off of your tongue as your boyfriend takes you. Harry’s right hand finds your clit, the pads of his fingers start toying with the sensitive pearl. “Look at you, takin’ my cock like the perfect slut that y’ are. Should fulfill more of your fantasies if this is how bloody good you’ll be.” He growls in your ear.

“Yes- yes, please!” You mewl, the prospect of exploring more of your desires with the man that you love makes you more aroused, your pussy clenches around his cock at the thought. “I- I love being your p-perfect little slut.”

“I know, angel. So fuckin’ perfect f’ Daddy.”

A whine leaves your lips, “God, Harry, I’m gonna cum.”

“Not before you tell me who you belong to, baby.”

Another whine leaves your lips; he’s playing a game with you and if you don’t obey the rules, you won’t get to orgasm. You need to orgasm.

“Yours, Harry. I- I’m all yours.”

He gives a particularly rough thrust and his teeth scrape at your ear, “Who’s pussy is this?”

You gasp, “Yours.”

“That’s right, angel. Now you can cum f’ me.”

Harry’s fingers on your clit continue to rub quick circles, his eyes fixated on your features twisting up in pure ecstasy as your orgasm hits you hard; jaw slack, eyes pinched shut, pussy throbbing around his cock.

The feeling of you squeezing around him like a vice triggers his own orgasm. He buries his face into the crook of your neck to muffle the loud groan that reverberates in his chest, his stomach clenching as he empties himself inside of you.

“Holy shit.” You chuckle breathlessly as your orgasms begin to dissipate. Harry’s hand falls away from your clit and he gingerly begins to pull out of you, eyebrows furrowing a bit at the feeling.

“Are you alright?” He asks, helping you steady yourself as you straighten up.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m alright. I do have a question for you,” You begin, just as you both start redressing, “were you being serious about fulfilling more of my fantasies? Or was that the testosterone talking?”

Harry grins, “Definitely not just the testosterone. We’ve never actually discussed what sexual fantasies you’ve had.”

“Do you have any?” You ask curiously, quietly wracking your brain for a possible answer he might give.

“Not very many, but I do have a few. Don’t think we should begin discussing them now, darling. We’ve been in here for a long time.” He replies, taking a quick glance at himself in the mirror, then wrapping an arm around your waist.

“Right,” You giggle, “we should go.”

Harry reaches to unlock the bathroom door and leads you back out into the club, the both of you exiting with smug expressions on your faces and one shared thought…

If this was only one of your fantasies, what else could you both explore?

244 notes · View notes

heartfullofleeches · 10 months

Note

Can we have more commissions with voice actor reader?

Maybe from some of your yans of choice?

Here's a list of requests I came up with off the top of my head:

Erin: "Victim gets revenge on his bully and makes him crossdress on film as they teach him a lesson."

V : "Sweet kitten gives their master under-the-desk support and promises he's the only one for them."

The Janitor: "Coworker tells listener everything is going to be okay and maybe gives them a kiss on the cheek idk I'm desperate."

C.C: "Crazy fan kidnaps a D.J and sits on his face holding him at knife point/Priest finds out nun's true identity as an incubus and fucks him in their study"

Miller: "sweetheart Interrupts their streamer spouse's stream ending in a cuddle session on live."

Kaimana: "Cute Sufer breeds seahorse male and holds him as they think about names for their future children."

Dea: "Listener dresses their grace spouse for a picnic and enjoy a peaceful day on the town. Their spouse compliments Listener's blue eyes and gifts them a sweater."

Alien: "Government Agent falls in love with the Alien they captured and the two destroys the government from in the inside out./Listener successfully storms Area 51, breaks out an incredibly sexy alien, and introduces them to chili's restaurants before blowing up the earth as they make out on the alien's ship."

Amyas: "Spouse gives their angel hubby a feather trimming and smothers him in kisses and affection."

Maddox: "Mario cart. Together."

Liu: "Listener and their spouse go on a hike in the woods and make dinner, cuddled together at a campsite."

Screamsicle: "Zombie spouse and their new love kill their ex and fuck on his grave/Cow summons demon and they crave pumpkins together."

Damsel Yan: "A hero saves a frightened princess from danger and is rewarded for their braver/Villian kidnaps a princess and accepts a trade of their body for their kingdom"

Mal: "Normal human doctor comes down with a cold and stays home taken care of by his love."

Spot/Clyde: "Rabbit takes care of his master after they've had a long day met with praise from his owner."

Melon: "Master holds hand with and maybe cuddles their sexbot maid as they describe the taste of sweets to them."

Pin: "Doll Owner makes a wish for their favorite doll to be a real person and falls in love once their wish comes true."

Gemi/Gemini: "Spouse cosplays an outfit from listener's fictions about them after finding their journal/Angel ties up and reads Devil lord's stories back to them as they punish them for every sinful thought/meet-cute at a comic story (Gemini) or bakery (Gemini)

#yandere oc #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere imagines #yandere scenarios #yandere insert #yandere headcanons #yandere #yandere blurb

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kirihotto · 2 months

Text

Forget.Him. PT.2{Jimin X Reader 18+}

→ Warnings: Sexual asst. topics suggested (Not aimed at Jimin),

→ Rating: 18+ Minors are prohibited from engaging and reading this content. It contains explicit content.

→ Genre: Mending relationship

→ Summary: You and Jimin just broke up. And by no means was it mutual. Honestly the reason why you dumped him was stupid. You were self conscious. Scared you weren't good enough for him compared to the many fans he has. The feelings are there. But you try to ignore them and Jimin's many texts and calls. But something get in the way of your plan.

→ Word Count: 3 010

Disclaimer: All members are face and name claims for the story. This is entirely a work of fiction and by no means is meant to be a projection, judgment or representation of real-life people. All works are purely for entertainment purposes.

Published: 03/28 / 24

Inspiration: (Strangers Kenya Grace) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgd5Bv7vefY

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“L-let me go.” I demanded. He smirked at me with not a word but tightened his grip. My eyes started burning once again filled with small fresh tears. Digging my nails into his hand I barely freed myself just as I was about to B line it to the door. Chang in close range. Someone stopped me.

“We are leaving.”

Everyone froze. I hadn't realized who it was at first. The person's arm that had been wrapped around me. Wearing a biker helmet with dark tinted lens a black leather jacket. Although I couldn't see through the helmet. I could tell by the voice and scent. Roses. It was Jimin. He had left the helmet on for his identity I'm sure.

“Ohh are you the EX boyfriend?” Chang mocked. Jimin gripped my shoulder after his comment. A wave of guilt rushed through me. Regretting every action I had made to lead me here. I looked up at Jimin, he let his arm off of me. Instead he grabbed my wrist and tugged me out the door. Chang quickly followed, shooting random insults at me I didn't hear past my thoughts.

The cold rain instantly stuck to my sweater. Jimin had led me quickly behind the diner into the staff parking near the garbage bins. Not much to my surprise there were bags of garbage, but among them not far away was a motorcycle. Jimin grabbed my attention away from the bike, removing his helmet. Saying not a word but brushing the slight runny makeup from my face. His hands were even cooler than the rain as they met my flushed cheeks. While his sharp eyes were tired and filled with concern. Locked on mine. We both stood in the cold rain as it poured down on us. He leaned closer and tucked a stray wet hair behind my ear. Our gaze not shifting. Until suddenly Jimin placed the helmet over my head.

“We’re gonna get wet. But this is the best I've got right now.” Jimin spoke as he grabbed another helmet from the bike's storage. Swinging his leg over the jet black bike. Starting the engine the lights came on with a rumble. Pushing back his silky black hair he pulled the helmet on. Then turned to me with a visible sigh in his shoulders.

Jimin patted the seat behind him, encouraging me to hop on. As I was left speechless. Making my way toward the bike, I hesitantly sat with my hands in my lap. Doing everything in my power not to sob like a baby again. Jimin’s head lowered in front of my view. His hand reached behind him in search of mine. Once again he pulled my wrist toward him, Although this time I knew what he had meant.

“I don't know what you're thinking right now. But you have to hold on to me to be safe. Make sure your bag is secure.” He warned me shouting slightly over the sound of the engine. I clung onto Jimin as soon as the words left his mouth. Tucking all my belongings in my purse I swung it flesh to my body and under my soaked sweater. As soon as we started to move I clung onto him even tighter.

Feeling his warmth against the fast cold chill from damp clothes. The warmth I had been longing for. I sobbed spouting my feelings out knowing he couldn't hear a word over the engine and traffic. Resting my head against his back slightly. I felt my warm tears running down my face as my hands shook from the grip on his waist. Either from the cold or my body exhausted from the constant tears. I'm sure he could feel me shaking, though his focus remained dead ahead.

We reached a red light and came to a stop. The wet pavement casting hues from the city lights. Catching my breath for a moment I felt Jimin’s hand rest on mine. We had sat at the red light in silence as he held onto my hand. I had wanted nothing more than him to never let go. The light flashed back to green and he let my hand go. Back to driving. Although I knew we weren't far away from his place.

Like clockwork we had pulled into his parking space. We both got off the bike without a word. I took off my helmet and gave it back to Jimin. He took it in one hand and instantly went for his door. Not as much as looking at me. The rain had eased up just as I made my way inside right behind him. I felt like a kid who had run away from home. Just to be dragged back by their mother.

The two helmets sat halfheartedly on the black mat in front of the door. Once I got inside Jimin slammed the door, pinning me to the backside of it. I didn't dare do anything but look at the floor. My soaked vans. We stood in silence for a moment. The sound of the rain splattering off the doorstep. The glow of the soft yellow outdoor light, the only one on. I could feel my body temperature dropping from the wet attire. Jimin had backed away from me with another sigh.

“So. Why aren't you answering my calls? Ignoring me for that idiot?” He spat out in disgust. My gaze flew up to meet him in an instant.

“W-we broke.. Up.. so I just forgot to reply..” I sputtered out. A flood of fiery anxiety filled my words. So much so I could hear it. Although I knew this would be it. My last chance to push him away. I had to do everything in my power to do so. After accepting my fate I looked down to the floor again. Clutching onto the strap from my purse. My hands shaking. We stood in silence once again. The faint sound of water dripping off of us. Jimin had his arms crossed in front of me. I could feel his intense gaze on me.

“Hm. Am I really that forgetful? You can't seem to keep my name out of that mouth.” Jimin stated with a hint of rage. He must've known what I was up to. My gaze flew up to meet him in an instant yet again as I gasped for air.

“I-!" The fire traveled up to my throat scorning my tongue. I searched Jimin’s eyes for an answer. Even though I was the one who held them all.

“Well, Care to explain?" Jimin asked again. He took a step closer to me, his dark hair dripping in his face. Like a shadow looming over me. I'm sure he knew. Somewhere in his mind he knew I wasn't really over him. Not at all. I was doing everything in my power not to throw myself into his arms. Shaking like a leaf under his intense gaze, I don't dare look at. Jimin lowered his head, his hand sliding back his wet hair. “Don't move.”

He warned me. Jimin wandered down the hall for a brief moment. In that moment I could catch my breath and say what needed to be said. Not what I had desired. I heard something hit the floor and the slam of a door. Returning without his soaked leather jacket and had on a white chanel T shirt. It had been soaked through enough to see his tattoos. As well as he had a towel hung around his neck, another in hand. He came over to me again, stretching the towel in out both hands.

“Here, lean forward your shaking.” He stated ever so softly after nearly growling at me. I did as he said and leaned forward a little. My face was met with his neckline and a wave of his comforting scent washed over me. His movements were gentle and slow. A towel placed around my neck as well. Jimin was about to pull back from me again, I stopped him from meeting my tearful gaze once again. Embracing him. Upon doing so I felt him flinch slightly. I buried my face into his tense shoulder. I felt a warm hand around my back, the feeling I'd been longing for. I felt Jimin sigh.

“Seriously. Tell me. what's going on..”

After his words I flinched. Right I was supposed to be getting away from him.. But.. I grabbed onto his shirt tighter.

“I-.. I’m not good enough.” I mumbled into his shoulder.

“Hm? What did you say?” Jimin spoke softly as we held each other. I paused for a moment. I pushed him off of me and held onto his shoulders looking him dead in the eyes.

“I’M NOT GOOD ENOUGH! You have hundreds of thousands hell i'd say MILLIONS of fans! People dying to meet you! Even famous people dying to meet you! I’m not worthy of the title of YOUR lover! Are you kidding me?!.. What would your fans think of- of me? Look at me. I'm standing here crying on your patio after I dumped you. On top of that I dumped one of the most popular men in the world. I’m a low class nobody with no beauty or talent..” I shouted out all the thoughts that had been in my mind when I had dumped him. On a rainy day similar to this…

“This is why you dumped me?.. Cut me off..” Jimin spoke, his gaze starstruck as I released my hold on him. Looking for an answer. Those sweet tired eyes. He placed a hand on my cheek again. The small action filled with love. Our eyes locked on eachother again. “I don't think I've ever been this mad at someone I love.”

I flinched from his words. Eyes not meeting mine. Although his hand hasn't moved from my face.

“Why can't you see? Just how amazing you are.” Jimin smiled at me softly. He brushed the tears off my cheeks again. “I chose you. I don't want anyone else. I have fans. People who want to meet me of a ‘higher class.’ That I won't deny. I've wanted to share with the world how lucky I am to have someone like you in my life. Even more so as a lover. I had asked you before, don't you remember? I know you don't want to be seen as a sort of Idol or in the public view in this way. I haven't said a word.”

I nodded in response. This was all true. The weight of Millions of eyes on me. Was something I didn't want.

“So.. THAT’S WHY I'M SO MAD!! I HAVE NEVER BEEN MAD AT ARMY BUT I'M STARTING TO WONDER IF I SHOULD BE! If they make you worry this much. I don't want to lose the one I hold dearest because of something like that.” Jimin yelled letting out his frustrations too. Tucking my hair all out of my face. He used the towel around my neck to dry it. “But listen. ARMY means the world to me, yes. ARMY is my family. But you. You're my love. Where I belong. There is enough room for everyone in my heart. Especially if that someone is you.”

“I.. I’m sorry..” I replied, dropping my head down again. Only for it to be lifted back up by Jimin's soft hand.

“Don't be sorry. Just talk to me. I didn't know this was bugging you this much. You're more than enough. In my eyes you're perfect. Even though I know you haven't seen it yet. Don't ever talk down about yourself. We are all only human. Emotions in just one price we pay either for good or bad.” Jimin reassured me. I grabbed the towel from his hands and threw it to the floor. Catching him by surprise. I nearly jumped into his embrace. “Woah- ok. I guess this means you're done ignoring me? Then? Or are you still dumping me cause I was late to realize all this-”

“NO! I’m not letting you go anywhere! I love-!” Just as I was about to proclaim my love once again, He had made a move of his own. Kissing me lovingly. Slowly. He held my body close to his, as his arms wrapped around my back. Our clothes, still wet. Clinging to each other. I could feel his muscles through his cold wet clothes. Our body warmth. Slowly he leaned his face back from me. Our bodies entangled.

“I love you. Now please stop shedding those tears. I’m here for you.” Jimin's tired eyes had seemingly been filled with content. I was filled with a longing. Making up for ‘missed time’. I grabbed the collar of his shirt and kissed him again. He had almost melted into me. “You have no idea how close I was to kissing you even as you were crying.”

“W-wait-” I realized what a beast I had just unleashed. After he spoke he kissed me again. Repeatedly over and over. Tightening his grip on my waist. Between kisses he mumbled something under his breath. “Open your mouth.”

I did as he said slowly and almost awkwardly. Jimin had never been this.. Demanding before. As soon as he had an opening he slid his tongue between my quivering lips with a moan. Like he’s devouring me whole. Under his intense kisses I let out small whimpers of my own. My face flustered as I gave myself to him. His kiss, addictive like a drug. Sliding my hands back up his chest and over his shoulders I felt him flinch a little. Adding fuel to the fire I had started. Jimin broke off the kiss. Leaving us both panting.

“Ahh..Mmm you remember our safe word hm?” Jimin questioned suddenly through breaths. We had set boundaries like this the first time we had sex together. But we haven't brought it up or used the word ever. It was shocking to say the least. But I knew we weren't going anywhere. I nodded, not meeting his gaze again. “Don't look away from me..”

Feeling his chest rise and fall rhythmically so. He unzipped my sweater slowly as he inched his face closer to mine once again. The single sound of the zipper rang through the hall as it quickly hit the floor. As he kissed me again, sliding his tongue between my lips with a smirk I could only feel. Jimin’s cold hands wandered my back, letting a small whimper escape me between harsh kisses. The strap of my purse I had clung onto desperately in prior moments, slid off my shoulder and landed on the floor. I had missed him so much his touch was driving me insane. I had opened my eyes briefly to be met with a lustful gaze devouring me.

“Hmm?” Jimin growled a little leaving a peck on my lips. “Someone’s getting confident. Daring to take a glance at me like this.”

“I.. uhm.. Yeah..” All words escaped me as my lungs were clawing for air. We hadn't moved from the entrance since we had walked in. Now a small growing collection of items on the floor under our feet. Jimin and I stood embracing each other as our eyes were locked. His eyes, easy to read, holding the sharp glint of lust. He suddenly slid his cold hand under the back of my crop top. I moaned out from shock. “Ah-uh!”

“H-hey. Your hands are freezing.”

“I think you mean we're freezing. We're both standing here in the hallway dripping wet.” Jimin retorted, sliding his hands about under the back of my top. Tracing my shoulders. Suddenly he leaned down resting his head on my shoulder. His wet hair cold against my flushed skin. My hands resting on Jimin’s tense shoulders. “Hm.. I love you so much. Don't do that again.”

He growled, although it was more like sulking. He licked a trail up my neck, pulling the collar on my top down a little. Revealing more of my neck. Leaving feathered kisses around my neck as I felt myself turning flustered. Seriously this was too much. My head was already spinning from the whiplash of emotions from tonight. I felt his hand tense trying to bring me even closer to him. Suddenly he bit down on my neck.

“Ahh~!” A moan ripped through my throat by my own surprise. By reflex I went to cover my mouth. Jimin had caught my arm. His warm breath fanning over the mark I'm sure he had left.

“No... Don't cover your mouth. I want to hear you.” He mumbled into my neck leaving more soft kisses. I felt his lips curl into a smirk as he pulled away. We were untangled for only a moment. Jimin ripped his shirt off and slammed it onto the floor. His hair is still wet, dripping a little as he shakes it out of his eyes. His muscles and figure damp from the rain. As my eyes traveled I was met with a not so shocking discovery. A visible bulge in his tight black jeans. “See something you like?”

Jimin teased as he chuckled a little and shook his head. My face had turned bright red the moment I had made eye contact. Stepping back toward me, he took my hand and placed it on his bare chest. I felt his heartbeat. Beating nearly as fast as mine.

“Only you do this to me” Jimin gestured to his whole body. Flustered again by his sly words I looked away. Although I took my chance and slid my hand down his form, feeling his abs quiver under my touch. There was something satisfying about the feeling.

“Only you.. make me think about.. things like this.” I said my gaze meeting Jimin’s abdomen. Before I knew what was coming he was devouring me again. The thought in the back of my mind why he had asked me about the safe word. Like he had known what I was thinking he placed a hand on my hip the other on my face. Pulling our hips together. The feeling makes me flinch, my knees weak. He had taken me and switched places with me. His back now in front of the door, encouraging me to walk down the hall. Although I'm not entirely sure how easy it'd be with him still devouring me.

“Mm- where are- we- mm going?” I questioned between kisses. Jimin paused for a moment

“A place you're quite familiar with.” He smirked. I tapped him on the chest with my fist for a brief moment. Before he took said hand we arrived in his room. His scent was overwhelmingly strong, my body flustered at the thought. I sat down on the bed, my knees about to collapse beneath me. My body begging for me to call out to him. As he stood above me. Jimin undid his belt although did not toss it to the floor rather, he climbed on top of me. Smothering me in more kisses. As he tugged at the hem of my shirt he looked up at me as almost a confirmation. The wet shirt then whisked off my form as Jimin was now fully on top of me. Leaving one soft kiss on my cheek as he pulled away. ‘Now then, let’s see those hands.”

“W-wait! You're not serious.” I nearly sat up in shock. Although he pushed me back down, sliding his hand down my torso. The dots finally connecting in my head. Not that I had not trusted him. Rather I wanted nothing more than to feel every inch of him. It wasn't helping how he was looming over me wet and shirtless. He seemed to have other plans, tying my hands together with his black leather belt. “J-jimin hang on. Please I-”

“These feelings aren't going anywhere. And now. Neither are you.”

#bts fic #bts x reader #bts fanfic #fanfic #bts #jimin x reader #bts jimin #park jimin #bts jimin fanfic #jimin

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cynicalundead · 7 months

Text

CYNICAL UNDEAD SYSTEM

cyn/graves

null/nullself unless we say otherwise

trauma-based system with osddid

lgbt in every imaginable way

mentally and physically disabled 🔥

audhd + npd/bpd/avpd on top of the system stuff

anti discourse , pro do whatever you want

buncha sillies :3

I vent and trauma post on main occasionally and I don't tag it jsyk

[If I violate your DNI just block me (or send hate, don't care). I don't do it on purpose. I just don't click on every profile I rb from]

opinions, DNI, personal info and userboxes below cut!!

WHAT WE BELIEVE -

• all systems and plurals deserve respect. however, medicalization of osddid is important and so is proper information. my intense respect for all plurals and my vehement belief in the importance of traumagenic focused discussion coexist. anti endos as a community are needlessly hateful and centered on vitriolic outburst rather than healing. it's repulsive.

• all queers are queer however they say they're queer (this includes contradictory, """"offensive"""" or annoying labels such as mspec monos, xenogenders, aroaces, pansexuals, toothpaste flag mlms, and more)

• 90% of people under 20 on the internet need to log off and talk to real people exclusively for a few weeks. I swear to God y'all need some Twitter detox I can't take it. Not everything is about you or your stupid self centered sensitive ass discourse stances. and before you say it, I have and continue to do this myself whenever the Internet becomes too much for me. this is a recommendation from experience.

• anybody who thinks the existence of people different from them (men, mlm, mspec monos, xenogenders, kin, systems, ""tme"", wtvr it is you're mad about) somehow attacks, belittles or erases them are neo conservatives. end of story! if a person is innocently existing or discussing their personal experience and identity and that MAKES YOU MAD, you are just as bad as them. your bigotry is driven by ignorant fear. cope

• fandom discourse is dumb and dangerous. especially shipcourse. harassing and harming folks over fiction is unbearable, and watering down words like csem and pedophile in the context of petty fandom drama is INCREDIBLY DANGEROUS and actively hurts the people you're pretending to protect. just fucking leave people alone, all of you, goddamnit

• "basic DNI criteria" and other DNI list tropes (like "racists and homophobes DNI" or "DNI endogenic """systems""" and mspec """lesbians""") are performative and idiotic means to express your opinions and stances. just fucking say what you believe this is so goddamn stupid. "pedos dni"? do you actually fucking hear yourself

that being said..

OUR DNI -

WHO WE ARE -

The Body - Cyn

• bisexual nonbinary afab

• disabled mentally and physically

• extremely traumatized and cynical

• radically inclusive, or at the very least radically neutral

The Host - David/DARCI

• bisexual cismale

• subsystem of 1 ANP + 2 EPs

- DARCI : persecutor, symptom holder

- David : host, protector, anp

- Little One : little, traumaholder

• introjects of Amphibia's Darcy (AU)

• spotted hyena, orange tabby and zombie kin

The Co-host - Vivienne

• @v-is-for-vivienne sideblog

• NPD holder + physical protector

• SD-V fictive

• she/her cis lesbian

• crazy bitch /pos

The Co-host - Jesse

• currently doesn't have a sideblog

• she/her+ aromantic aceflux lesbian

• BPD holder + social persecutor

• Vriska fictive

• TMNT fan

Honorable Mentions - Frequent Fronters

• Latte , Sir Fluff fictive , caretaker

• Karkat , transmasc , traumaholder

• Error , BPD holder, OCtive

• Oculus , OCtive

• Vanny, FNAF introject, dissociator

• Catnap, caretaker/ISH, PPT fictive

• Kinito, symptom holder, agender & aroace

• Marcy, ex-host & traumaholder, middle

#intro

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transfemlogan · 1 year

Note

Think I could ask what you think of Logan’s character and where you think his character arc will go (or at least, where you’d like to see it go in the series)? Honestly I’m just interested in hearing you talk about him

I found this rlly far down my drafts. Somehow. Idk how it got there. But at least I don't have to rewrite the entire beginning 🧡

NOTE: I have Aphasia. It's a language disorder that affects my ability to understand and use language and it affects me both within writing and speaking. This is going to be a little incomprehensible and all over the place, but be nicies to me and feel free to ask for clarification.

This is more of a ramble, than a nice and neat analysis.

Everyone is allowed to add on :3c

ALSO SORRY TO ANYONE TAGGED</3 You're most likely tagged because I was quoting/linking a post by you.

OK. LET'S TALK ABT LOGAN (FT MY BAD SCREENSHOTS):

[ID: a screenshot of Logan Sanders from the Sanders Sides episode "My True Identity!" He is smiling at the camera and making finger guns. /end ID]

This might be incomprehensible I love logan sanders. So much. Its so hard to put into words i jsut love him OK. He is perfect in every day & also a little nerd. & Beautiful. & handsome. & my babygirl.

I feel like a lot of fans treat him as if he is... like any other glasses wearing character in fiction. Byakuya Togami is the first to pop into my mind, same with Kusuo Saiki from The Disasterous Life of Saiki K, Freddy Riley from Identity V, Charles Offdensen from Metalocalypse, Kyoya Ootori from Ouran Highschool Hostclub, ETC. THERE'S A LOT OF GLASSES GUYS. (Note: these characters do not completely fit each other, but you get the point.)

The trope of "smart, unemotionless, rude/blunt character wears glasses" is something fans will shove Logan into, but the thing is Logan's character takes this trope and completely snaps it in half and throws it in the trash.

Logan is smart. He is blunt and can be the biggest asshole at times. He is """unemotional""" (stated by him).

[ID: a screenshot of Logan Sanders from the Sanders Sides episode "Dealing With Intrusive Thoughts". The captions reas, "Everything is okay." /end ID]

But he's also compassionate. He is hopeful. He cares so much for the people around him and he holds so much love in his heart.

This post (link) by @intrulogical probably phrases it way better than I ever could + this post (link) by @nesushii

I think that's what makes Logan such a compelling character. He's not someone who needs to "learn how to feel" (which is an idea in fiction I dislike) (it can become a little ableist), he is someone who does feel and know he feels and feels so much all the time, but he can't express it well due to both the environment around him and how he shows his emotions.

A lot of Logan's asshole actions, I think, are less him actively trying to be rude and more him just struggling really bad.

In Moving On, he is "rude" but it's because he realises his actions were Wrong and he's trying to Fix It. He recognises Virgil's panic attack, how this room is affecting Thomas, and realises that he should have listened to Patton. But because of the affects of Patton's room and Logan's tone and phrasing, he comes off as Mean. He becomes defensive as everyone blows him off and it affects how he's trying to help everyone.

In LNTAO, Logan is confused about the entire situation. He doesn't understand why singing or puppets would help Thomas and, as Logic, it is terrifying to not Know when it's his entire job to know. His confusion turns into defensiveness, and because he already struggles to express his emotions in a way that the other sides like/understand, his confusion (& defensiveness) comes off as anger and purposeful ignorance. Which is why the sides and Thomas treat him the way they do— they're assuming he doesn't want to know. Which is entirely untrue!

I know I've talked so much already about how Logan is unintentionally autistic coded (I'm even writing an entire essay about it), but like... HE IS SO AUTISTIC CODED!!

This character that struggles with expressing himself. Who lives in an environment where he feels like he has to exist a certain way, or else he won't be accepted. Who doesn't understand tone or sarcasm or the "big picture". Who struggles with other people viewing him as some sort of unemotionless ""monster"", bexause they don't understand him. Who wants to be heard and understood.

In DWIT, he feels like he's finally doing something right. That he's on the right path. And then it immediately get snatched away in POF and then again in WTIT. And that's such an inherently autistic experience. You feel like you're masking right, you're fitting in, people are accepting and loving you— only to act "too autistic" and the false comfort you wanted is snatched away (a little more complex and nuanced than that, but you know).

He is... So Autistic and it HURTS. (He could also be viewed as neurodivergent in general— I can relate to him outside of autism, with my schizophrenia and speech impediment.)

I also relate to him heavily as a child abuse victim. I've brought it up a few times, but I haven't been able to express entirely what I mean by calling him "child abuse coded" (WHICH IS A PHRASE I KEEP GIGGLING AT).

Logan's entire situation with anger feels so... similar to my own anger issues and trauma. The way he will get so angry and explode only to calm down and realise his actions.

[ID: two screenshots of Logan Sanders from the Sanders Sides episode "Working Through Intrusive Thoughts". In image one, he is pointing at someone out of frame and looking down at the floor with a confused expression. In image two, he has a hand on his tie and looks upset. /end ID]

Hurting those around you because you're hurting is something I feel like most, if not all, abuse victims struggle with. And especially with child abuse victims, I personally always feel on edge. Like I have to defend my actions 24/7 and I need to express myself perfectly or else no one will understand and I will "get in trouble" and "punished".

It reminds me so much of Logan. After he gets angry and explodes (partially due to the Orange Side, based on how the series is being shown), he immediately is confused and shameful and scared.

Logan is scared and ashamed of his own actions and is trying so hard to fix himself and not be that, not be an angry aggressive person. But it's not as simple and apologising and moving on and it's definitely much harder when those around you will not let you / don't understand fully.

ANYWAY Logan's character means so much to me as an autistic, abused guy. //slaps Logan// this guy can hold SO much trauma!

This post (link) by @orbmanson7 I think puts some of my thoughts into better words about Logan's anger and boundaries and everything (which also helps us segway into talking about his arc)

The thing with Logan's arc is that it's a little more complex than just "Logan wants to be listened to". All of the sides want to be listened to, that's the entire point of them. They all want to help Thomas.

It's not only that Logan wants to be listened to and isn't, it's also that Logan is actively listening to critiques and trying to fix and change. He is hearing and seeing that something he is doing is not helpful and is upsetting people. He wants to fix it and change and improve. But no matter what he does, nothing seems to "fix the issue"— Thomas still will not listen to him.

Logan has to unlearn this idea that he needs to constantly be improving himself, that he has to act a certain way, in order for someone to listen and understand him (AGAIN. WHY I RELATE TO HIM AS A ABUSE VICTIM). AND, the sides need to be actively changing how they are treating him. Because him unlearning this won't immediately fix the issue if the sides aren't working too.

The situation can't be fixed with a simple promise of "we will listen to you, Logan", because they've been doing that the entire series.

[ID: a screenshot of Logan Sanders from the Sanders Sides episode "Working Through Intrusive Thoughts". He is holding a notebook near his chest and looks dejected. The captions read, "Another day, Logan, I promise." /end ID]

ALSO, this doesn't fall completely on the other sides. Logan still needs to work on letting himself express things and learning how to cope with his strong, intense emotions like his anger. He's lashing out at the other sides and that's not okay. He can't hurt the people he cares about because he's angry and upset (see the ending of POF before Janus reveals his name).

Which... is one of the reasons I really do not want his anger to be "caused by" the orange side. I want this to be something he is experiencing and going through, because if it's "oooh a dark side is controlling him!!" then it won't be a "Logan issue", it'll be a "dark side issue". Which is not what he OR the viewers need.

Logan needs to overcome and cope with his issues without someone inserting themselves into his arc. The more people are thrown into the mix, the more the attention is drawn away from Logan, and I think his arc is something that desperately needs to be told and focused on.

And NO . I am not a fan of "Logan is the Orange Side" theories. There's a million reasons why that's not true if you actually watch and pay attention to the series (it's a very fun AU, but falls apart in context of the actual series). (Plus I don't want him to stop being indigo.......)

I also don't want Logan's arc to end up with him "turning into a dark side" for a MULTITUDE of reasons:

The "dark sides" aren't like... an actual, genuine thing...? It's not something you can ""become"", it's something you are forced into. It is a term created by Roman to describe sides that Thomas views as inherently bad or evil. The only way for Logan to ""become"" a "dark side" is if someone, in an episode, verbally, called Logan a "dark side".

Obviously, Logan can be treated like a "dark" side. In fact, how he is being treated in the series is very similar to how Virgil was treated in seasonn 1 or how Janus is being treated, ETC. BUT I don't want him to be called a "dark side", because I feel like that brings up an entirely new conflict? Now it's not focused on them ignoring Logan, it's focused on "Logic is evil?" "Thomas views Logic as bad?".

I'm struggling really hard to explain, but I feel like it just layers the conflict and I don't want that. I don't want Logan's arc to include the dark sides in any way. I want it to be focused on him.

(HOWEVER, I don't mind the connection between Logan and the dark sides through their similarities and finding comfort each other because of it. In fact, I love it. But I am not sure how to elaborate on that and how I want their relationships to be, so I skipped over it. If someone asks later, I can try to put it in words. In short, less of the "dark sides" affecting Logan, more Logan affecting the "dark sides"? I don't know if that makes sense.)

Also, I don't trust real-life Thomas to write it well! While he is very good at writing conflict, he sucks at resolving conflict (see: Virgil's reveal as a dark side at the end of DWIT and how it's handled in ATHD). Logan becoming a "dark side" already adds more to his already conflict-filled arc, I don't want to then see it be swept under the rug or handled really badly. Logan deserves a good arc. Don't bite off more than you can chew, or whatever, leave his arc alone. Stop it. Please.

I think that's all I wanted to say?

In short: Logan is full of hope and love and compassion and is so, so autistic coded and has so much trauma. I think his arc is more complex than "not being listened to" and he has to unlearn a lot. I don't want his arc to involve the orange side/him being the orange side, or any of the dark sides, because that brings the attention away from him.

#ask #sanders sides #logan sanders #blog tags ->#essays!#IT. COUNTS. OK. EVEN THOUGH ITS RAMBLY.#logan #revys essays!#sure whatever

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voxofthevoid · 11 months

Text

Tropes Game

Tagged by @cursedvibes. Thanks, man! This looks fun, and I loved reading your responses <3

Rules

How much do these tropes affect your decision to click on a fic?

-10 -> very dissuaded

0 -> don’t care either way

10 -> very enticed

nope -> if it’s a hard no and you’d never click on a fic with that tag or or you even have the tag blocked or you’d insta click out of the fic if it wasn’t tagged.

Bonus points for explaining the rating and whether it’s conditional.

Trope List

Age gap: 7/10

Age gap alone isn’t a selling point for me, especially since there’s a world of difference between, say, 30/40, 20/30, 15/25, 50/500, etc. But if I get into a ship that has an age gap, especially a le problematique one, I will lean into it full tilt, as you can currently see with goyuu. There’s a lot of fun, often fucked-up, things to be done with differing life experiences and maturity levels, and that’s usually interesting to explore. From the reading end, it depends on the individual ship and also how the specific fic approaches it.

Codependency 10/10

Hell to the fuck yeah! I prefer unhealthy relationships over healthy ones (...in fiction, Tumblr), and codependency tends to add a fun flavor. I’m picky about it when reading. I default to it when writing.

Enemies to lovers 10/10

Good stuff, and I’ll never say no to some violent hate sex. I don’t have many ships like this though; it’s mostly something I read. Or make AUs of.

Enemies with benefits 6/10

Fun concept, depends on the execution. I’d prefer that it become enemies to lovers in the end, however.

Fake dating/relationship -7/10

It’s not an instaquit, and I have read and enjoyed fics with this premise, but the trope itself is something that I’m not a fan of. Mostly because it tends to follow a certain romcom formula that I’m not a fan of.

Found family -5/10

I’ll read it, and as a theme, it’s fine, but for one, what I often see described as found family is...not. It’s friendship—and that’s my preference anyway. Friends who support and love each other, without the label of family attached. This is a heavily personal preference, obviously.

Friends to lovers 7/10

It’s good; it can be fun. The way friendship evolves into a romantic and/or sexual relationship can also be quite interesting and emotionally fulfilling.

Friends with benefits 7/10

As a central relationship, I’d prefer that it become friends to lovers eventually. The execution matters again because too romcomy, and I get turned off. Throw in some emotional fuckery, and I’m sold. It’s also one of my go-to flavors for minor/background/past relationships when writing. Friends who fuck without strings is a fun concept.

Hurt/comfort 8/10

A solid concept, and depending on the execution, it can range from pleasant to devastating (in a good way).

Love triangle -10/10

A “proper” love triangle is something I find about as compelling as stale vomit. It’s not an instant nope because I like the sort that evolves into poly—either triads or V-style poly (that is, A/B and C/B, with A and C as metamours). When reading, I prefer the former, and when writing, I prefer the latter.

Mistaken/hidden identity 10/10

Sign me the fuck up. Identity porn is almost as good as actual porn.

Monster fu… relationship 10/10 (100/10)

I have "Monsterfuckers Inc.” as a semi-frequently used fic tag on Ao3. I’ll let you guess just how into this I am. I’m into it for the freaky sex, but typical relationship development is always a plus.

Obsession, possessiveness, etc 10/10

Unhealthy relationships my beloved.

Opposites (like grumpy×sunshine, etc) 0/10

Fine in theory, but whether I’m into it depends on the execution. I don’t think I write it much.

Poly 7/10

JJK is the first time I’ve written (and planning to write more) poly relationships, but I’ve read and enjoyed quite a few in previous fandoms. Again, execution matters, but the concept is fun.

pregnancy nope/10

Major squick, and it seems to be becoming more and more of one these days. Ironically, I’m very into breeding kink and monster-style impregnation (eggpreg, insta-birth-type monster offspring etc.). It’s realistic pregnancy (and the mpreg equivalent of realistic pregnancy) that puts me off.

Second chance 0/10

Rated it neutral because this can be either 10/10 or -10/10 for me depending on how it’s handled. No middle ground lol.

Sex to feelings 10/10

Been there done that. Love the concept, can go rabid over it if done right. I certainly like writing it.

Slowburn 6/10

I’ve read and enjoyed plenty of slowburn fics, but it’s not a formula I’m a fan of. When I write it, it always tends to be the “sex to feelings” sort.

Soulmates 0/10

Another case of either 10/10 or -10/10. The easiest way to get me into it is to play into the horror/angst aspects. “People who fate decreed as belonging to each other” doesn’t appeal much to me.

Tagging (no pressure) @thelionshoarde @actualalligator @stilllostinthedaydream and @sorrythatwasamistake @joeys-piano and anyone else who wants to do it

#tag game #vox has opinions #been a while since I used that tag lol #i did not read this over; ignore the typos please

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notsocheezy · 2 months

Text

A Messy Attempt at a Writeblr Intro

This is way overdue, but as my one-hundred-and-first post on the hellsite, I'll go ahead and tell you a little about me. Too much, perhaps. No matter - that's what I always do.

I'm Cassandra Erica, local girlish-shaped thing carrying she/they pronouns under each arm (despite how much more difficult it makes grocery shopping). I'm traumatized and so are mostly all of my characters, and they deserved it just as much as I did (none) but that's the cards they're dealt. By me. I swear, I tried to stop writing about childhood trauma, it just didn't work.

"So," you're wondering, "what have you written so far? What are you working on? Are you going to keep up this weird reflexive second-person perspective?" To answer back-to-front: no, many things, and not quite as many things. Here are some lists!

~~~

RELEASED ON NOTSOCHEEZY.COM!

The Real Me (2022, Short Story)

There's something a bit off about businessman Mr. Shirley Jones. What's he hiding?

Three Takes on Death (2022, Short Story)

What might happen when we die?

Pink Bow (2022, Novella)

Who knew trying on one dress at the mall could change a person's entire life? Chris - or, uh, Kris - certainly didn't. Was it just a dress inside that box with the pink bow, or was it something more?

Plus some other things, don't worry about it.

~~~

BRAIN CURDS

Brain Curds are lightly edited flash fiction - practically first drafts - posted daily and sometimes written with the express intention of being terrible… but, you know, in an endearing way. Here are some of the greatest hits!

Three. Two. One. (#31)

The Characters V The Author (#28)

The Frank Program #1 (#13)

Passable. #1 (#30)

Government Man #1 (#4)

The Heart Wants What It Wants (#39)

~~~

WIP!

Anthill Theory (Short Film) Post-Production

An exploration of free will through a time loop that the protagonist doesn't know he's in.

Mercy's Ocean (Short Story) Awaiting Feedback

Alternate opening chapter for a Novel written by my high school English teacher.

Blue Rabbit (Short Story) Pre-Final

Sequel to A Covenant of Rust (see below). I keep telling myself I'm going to finally finish this one.

One Late Night Easter Morning (Short Story) First Draft

A chance encounter at a bar leads to late-night musings about humanity.

The Order of the Degenerati (Novel) Outlining

A secret society was formed after the tragedy of the holocaust to make sure it never happened again. Unfortunately, nowadays the most they can do is make YouTube videos go viral.

It Goes Up (Never Never NEVER NEVER NEVER) Complete

You will never read it.

Memories Retained (Novella?) Outlining

Ever had a dream where you were back in high school, before it all went to shit, and you decided to do something differently? Ever woke up and found out it really happened?

Seeing Other People (Novel?) Pre-Brainstorming

A story of love, polyamory, Dissociative Identity Disorder, and heartbreak. Gee, I wonder why I feel compelled to write this one?

Dominic of the Darkness (Series?) Brainstorming/Partially Written

The antichrist is about to celebrate his sweet 666th birthday by breaking hell - that is, going to live on Earth for a week. Fan favorite for those in the know.

And MORE! THERE IS ALWAYS MORE!

~~~

MY BOOK!(?)

Publishers don't seem super interested in collections of short stories, and I'm afraid a collection of short stories and novellas may make a literary agent's head explode, so expect to see Tales from Starved Childhoods as a self-published debut! It includes a fully rewritten new version of Everyone Has Their Price (2017); newly revised versions of Next Day Delivery (2017), The Real Me (2022), Three Takes on Death (2022) and Pink Bow (2022); and all-new stories such as:

A Covenant of Rust (2023, Novella)

A newlywed couple moves into a 1950s prefab home in early 2020, but finds more hidden beneath the surface than the floor plan could reveal. Will forgotten secrets and isolation bring them together, or tear them apart?

AND SOME OF THOSE WIPs UP THERE! THEY'RE WHY THIS ISN'T OUT YET!

Tales from Starved Childhoods is set to be the physical manifestation of my early career as a writer, so stay tuned and look for it someplace books are sold!

~~~

If you'd like to be one of my readers or vice versa, don't hesitate to reach out! I'm always happy to have more eyes on what I'm making and I'm always happy to read something new. It helps with the burnout. I'm open to most any genre - I don't really think much about labels when coming up with ideas.

If you work for a publisher and you see something you like, send an email to [email protected] with the subject line, "Business Factory."

#writeblr #women writers #female writers #writing #nsc original #writing community #writerscommunity #writers on tumblr #author #writers #creative writing #intro #writeblr intro #writer things #writeblr community #writeblr stuff

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overmore · 4 months

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Joscarl fic recommendation list

same as last time, all the fics I really love for this ship! Though, I have decided to not include all the special fics mostly since I know most would not be interested in them. I will make a seperate list for those later.

Reversed by Hitoshi__Shinso

5.7k words, finished. Loved this one a lot, Joseph is real creepy in it a bit.

The damned and the lonely by YosanoOrihara

4.3k words, finished. Has necrophilia al keep that in mind. Probably one of the best uses of that concept for this ship that I've seen so far.

Wonder by PipPip

1.6k words, finished. Love the macro/micro trope, works well here cause tiny fairy Aesop.

sex with a ghost by orphan_account

2.1k words, finished. Again necrophilia but still not too bad. I adore a bit more mean Joseph no matter the situation.

Another means by Komilk

6.3k words, finished. Hunger games au. Absolutely adored it. Will never get tired of fics with the D.M. skin. Not even familiar with the hunger games books and I loved this.

Cherry on Top by orphan_account

6.3k words, finished. Loved this one too, not enough modern au in this fandom sometimes.

Literally anything by purplefox

Just. Read all of bit. They were the joscarl writer, if it wasn't for mean people in the fandom maybe we'd still have more fics from them.

The Blood We Spill… by ManiacalTeddy

6.9k words, finished. Exorcist x Bloody Sword. All I can say is vampires man. Love them and their blood drinking so much.

Good enough to eat by Komilk

14.3k words, finished. Man. I love royalty themed stuff. And man, the food play? chiefs kiss.

And just like last time a bonus in a form of my own fic, that still follows the rule I set:

Don't feel quite right

4.3k words, finished. Truth & Inference au, D.M./Gatto. Important warning for eating disorder. This is a series of one shots, though updates are fairly slow. Can still be enjoyed on their own though.

#joscarl #identity v #idv #fan fiction #fanfiction #idv fanfic #fanfic #idv photographer #idv embalmer #joseph x aesop #fanfic rec

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wrongpublishing · 1 year

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You Should Diversify Your Horror Rec List (Rec List Enclosed)

by Rae Maybee.

If you’re a Western reader, hopelessly in love with horror as hard as I am, you might have found you’ve gotten bored of the common tropes involving demons, poltergeists, vampires, and zombies. While it might be part of the fun for genre elements to provide reliable elements to a book that you’ll know you’ll enjoy, a predictable ending might conversely not be as hard-hitting and well… scary.

Psychologist D. Zillmann proposes that enjoyment is the result of suspense and specifically, the anticipation of a resolution.* For this sense of suspense to be at its most acute, a reader must not know exactly how the plot is going to resolve—for better or for worse—because the resolution itself is technically less important than one’s anticipation of it. Dr. Neil Martin, summarizing multiple studies of horror film viewers, also proposes that enjoyment is associated with destruction, excitement, and unpredictability.** In other words, fans enjoy horror because they find it new, interesting, and stimulating; entertainment comes from the exposure to new ideas. (Usually, horror does this well by shocking and appalling.)

Dr. Matias Clasen’s 2012 biocultural approach to horror, furthermore, examines monsters specifically as an adoptive storytelling form designed to help readers encounter and deal with innate fears.*** Most interestingly, he argues that there is a depth to horror that taps into our upbringing and the instincts we’ve evolved to survive—that is, environmental factors brought on by our culture and other surroundings.

While it is true that many cultures share fears and conceptualize similar ideas revolving around those fears, it is also true that there is a wealth of unfamiliar concepts waiting to be explored outside the boundaries of intra-national fiction. Using Dr. Clasen’s model, one could surmise that writers of different cultures will have grown up with varying fears, based on their unique geographies and socio-political climates. A writer from one continent might write a monster inspired by an animal that another continent doesn’t encounter, to give one broad example. And horror consumers will attest that religious and mythological elements play a big part in many subsets of the genre (those tend to be known for inspiring fear.)

To give an example from my own experience, when a reader who has consumed nothing but American horror is exposed to say, a demon possession in a book they’re reading, they may be able to predict its strengths and weaknesses (ergo, an exorcism). However, that same reader picking up a book from, say, Bolivia, might find themselves introduced to a threatening Pishtaco and especially worried about the powers it might yield.

Of course, if you’re reading this and you’re already well-acquainted with the monsters of the Andes region of South America, fear not. I’m excited about a few other recommendations for books that will pique your curiosity.

Violet Kupersmith’s Build Your House Around My Body is a good example of a novel that winds around itself and consistently keeps the reader guessing. The story revolves around a young Vietnamese-American woman who has traveled to Saigon to teach English—and, hopefully, reconnect with her heritage. She gets far more than she bargained for, though, as her story intersects with almost fifty years of Vietnamese history coming back to (quite literally) haunt.

Stephen Graham Jones’s The Only Good Indians is a novel about four Blackfeet Native American men struggling with tradition, identity, and the wrath of a spirit hard-bent on vengeance. Readers are kept on their feet by the intense imagery and shifting points-of-view which never let the tension slack for a moment.

The Queen of the Cicadas, by V. Castro, follows a woman who’s returned to Texas for her best friend’s wedding. Once there, she comes face to face with a local legend, la Reina de las Chicarras, who was born from the unsolved murder of a Mexican farmhand. Part detective story, part tale of revenge, this book introduces readers to a number of goddesses and ghosts—and all the worse, the very harsh realities faced by migrant workers.

Whether it’s with the books above or beyond, I highly recommend seeking out and supporting authors from cultures and nations different to your own. Fear is such a universal emotion, and not only will more international interest boost chances of further translated works (we always need more), their perspectives simply demand to be heard. After all, it’s a big, diverse, and terrifying world out there. You already love it; why not wander further into the darkness?

Rae Maybee is a graduate student from Emerson College’s Publishing and Professional Writing program, and she’s published the following pieces online: “Momentary Imbalance” in The Bluffton University Literary Journal and “Challenging the Best to be Better” in Moreover.

*D. Zillmann (1996). “The psychology of suspense in dramatic exposition” in Suspense: Conceptualizations, theoretical analyses, and empirical explorations eds. P. Vorderer, H. J. Wulff, and M. Friedrichsen (New York: Routledge, 1996).

**Neil Martin, “(Why) Do You Like Scary Movies? A Review of the Empirical Research on Psychological Responses to Horror Films” Frontiers in Psychology 10 (2019). 10.3389/fpsyg.2019.02298

***Mathias Clasen, “Monsters Evolve: A Biocultural Approach to Horror Stories” Review of General Psycology 16, no. 2 (2012): 222-229. https://www.ucentral.edu.co/sites/default/files/inline-files/monsters-evolve-cineclub-julio-2020.pdf

#review #gothic fiction #gothic literature #book review #horror books #fiction review #horror fiction #horror literature #tbrbooks #horror tbr #essay #lit essay #horror industry #literary criticism #horror novels #gothic lit #horror lit

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doomed-jester · 1 year

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Okay so you guys know I'm a huge Venom fan, and probably that I adore Carnage too. They're two of my favorite fictional characters of all time. But the current situation for Carnage is... Really convoluted.

The new Carnage run seems to be working to rectify this but honestly this description alone exemplifies part of the problem.

There are too many Carnages right now. So here's a quick rundown of the Carnage situation and how I would fix it. Keep in mind these are just my takes.

So, to clarify, I will be considering it a separate incarnation or Carnage only if they've demonstrated an independent will (otherwise they're an offshoot like the Carnage doppelgangers in Absolute Carnage) and have not used a new identity (Scorn isn't Carnage because she's used a different name and clearly sees herself as a different entity)

So, caveats out of the way, the list:

> Carnage IV (Grendel): this is the Carnage that's been focused on for the duration of the current run. It has inherited the memories of the original Carnage from its time with Cletus, along with the abilities granted to Carnage II by the Darkhold, so you could make a strong argument that this is Carnage Prime now, though it's also the same Grendel symbiote that appeared on Earth in ancient times, battled Thor and later became the foundation of the Sym-Soldier program.

> Extrembiote/Carnage V (Cletus Kasady): after fusing with Carnage IV during the events of Extreme Carnage, Tony Stark's 'Extrembiote' became the primary host for Cletus Kasady's codex. While official material suggests that the Extrembiote is NOT operating under the Carnage identity, it's definitely operating as Cletus. Given that Carnage II, III and IV all existed as different symbiotes before bonding to Cletus, it's fairly safe to call the Extrembiote 'Carnage V.' This version considers itself the original Cletus and operates out of the ruins of St Estes, the orphanage Cletus grew up in. Also a strong contender for Carnage Prime.

> Carnage... IV and a half... ("Cletus"): while technically an offshoot of Grendel/Carnage IV, this symbiote is bonded to detective Jon Shayde, protagonist of the ongoing Carnage series. It's evident from its behavior that it's an independent offshoot, and has adopted the persona and mannerisms of Cletus Kasady.

> Hybrid Carnage (Renesmee): the newest iteration, but one I don't see sticking around. This Carnage was created by recently introduced villain The Harrower at the beginning of the current Deadpool run. It was created through her biofusion/biofission abilities from the remains of a Carnage doppelganger, making it a Grendel offshoot. Renesmee was then forcibly bonded with Deadpool, as his regenerative powers gave it the best chance of maturing before killing its host. Hybrid Carnage is definitely the most parasitic incarnation so far, entirely consuming its host. Due to its recent introduction, there's not much else to say about this iteration.

So, how do we fix this fucking MESS? Well, the first thing I'd do is have Carnage IV drop the name and return to the Grendel identity, or a new name entirely. It's clearly working towards some kind of transcendental goal, a rebranding could work for that.

Carnage V/The Extrembiote should fully take over the Carnage identity again. Cletus IS Carnage, I think that's what makes him the logical Carnage Prime.

Shayde's offshoot should just die or get forcibly reabsorbed by Grendel, or The Extrembiote since it seems to consider itself to be Cletus.

There's actually some serious potential for Renesmee/The Hybrid Carnage. I would have it take on a new name and become a side character in Deadpool's series. It just doesn't make sense for it to use the Carnage name.

Or hey, maybe everything I've said is way out of line and you have better ideas. Idk, I'm not the writers, nothing I say actually matters.

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padfootastic · 1 year

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Unpopular opinion time! I'm queer and super here for queer rep always, but the newest/youngest wave of MWPP fans needs to understand that there just wouldn't have been 5-15 openly queer/trans/gnc students running around Hogwarts in the 1970s. Even if one or all of them had the wherewithal to understand that about their identity in the first place, it wouldn't have been safe to be openly out in that context. Hell, it was illegal to be gay in Scotland until 1981.

So this unpopular opinion is a 2-parter, which is also that fic is way more interesting when it depicts queerness as understanding its context. Sure it can be there, it always has been, but this is a conservative boarding school in 1970s Scotland and is so much more interesting when that's acknowledged.

oooooh okay, so. we’re really getting into it, huh?

i think i’m gonna go with…neutral on this. not because i don’t have opinions, but bc i have too many of them.

so, for one, funnily enough im not big on realism in fiction (esp set in other universes like hp’s wizarding world) and that translates into a lot of freedom to move around in terms of identity hcs. one of my favs, for eg, is that homosexual relationships aren’t a big deal bc say, fertility potions & pregnancy spells, yeah? another longstanding hc i have that i staunchly believe in is complete gender equality/lack of sexism in the WW. so, if u hc it as being open to all sexual/gender orientations bc, magic, then u completely (and happily) sidestep the whole ‘queerness in 19th ce britain’ yeah? the whole illegal thing is also a bit iffy too bc i personally consider the WW to be a v distinct society with its own everything but that’s a personal hc tbf.

having said that—i get so annoyed by some representation lol

i mean, people write what they want as they should but sometimes it comes off so fkn hollow. like they’re doing it because they should, not bc it’s their wish. and there’s all sorts of sociological reasons behind it and why i’m so annoyed by that but the baseline is this: queer rep becomes more virtue signalling that robs itself of all its virtue and i don’t…vibe with that.

Send me unpopular opinions!

#i loved this one!!#i usually run the other when it comes to representation talk #bc my opinions r…very. how do i put this.#not what the majority says #and i know that’s bc it’s a very individualised thing based off my own experiences #so i try not to generalise it. which means not rly speaking about it #but yeah #dude i almost deleted this by accident #literally about started crying #anyway. i’ve not quite conceptualised what exactly i would vibe with #but i know what i don’t with #so. yah. that is where i’m at rn #somewhere in the middle bc i *get* it but i don’t like it #re: nuance of sexuality. well fandom would be better if people acknowledged nuance in general #so much becomes shallow and meaningless #pen’s asks

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aspectabundgaze · 6 months

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Activism : The Play, Scene II

Activism has always been around for such a long, long time. However, not a lot of people are aware of how people back in the days used to use their voices or influence in the acts of activism. Which brings up to the question I have in mind, "What was activism like in the days of Ancient Greece?" "Now I know they have protests too, but did they incorporated it into their entertainment? Entertainment has always been a tool to advocate for changes. Right?"

I've always been a huge fan of ancient Greek history, mainly mythology but sometimes, I do dabble into their philosophical and political sides. To answer my own question, I've decided to do a slight dive on Aristophanes.

First thing's first, what is activism? Nolas, S.M., Varvantakis, C. and Aruldoss, V., 2017 defines activism as an act that could be driven by the intentions to challenge social norms, practices that holds back and oppresses, suppresses identities that does not conform to the values of a society. Now activism can happen anywhere and any time, from a playground where both genders can play together without being judged for being a girl or a boy, a dinner table where discussions from studies, work, world issues can happen. Nolas, Varvantakis and Aruldoss, 2017 have also stated in their papers activism can also be a response to changes and events within the society, such as the rise of new social movements and the need to do a dive in onto political participation in the face of unexpected political outcomes. So how does this relate to Aristophanes?

Now according to an article published by Columbia College, Aristophanes was an ancient Greek playwright and comedian who lived in Athens, he was born somewhere around 446 BCE and died around 386 BCE. He was best known for his comedic plays, wrote roughly around 40 plays, where only 11 of his works survived to this very day. The reason why I found that his work is related to activism, particularly political activism is because his plays were known for its satirical and political nature. He incorporated humour, an exaggeration towards contemporary issues, philosophy and social trends into his work, making him known as one of the first people to be a public relations activist. Using political satire was one of the Ancient Greek's way to perform activism and public relations. (Bisbe, M., Molner, E. and Jimenez, M., 2019).

An example that can be taken from Aristophanes' play called "Lysistrata" written in 411 BCE that depicts the Peloponnesian war between the Athens and the Spartans. As known with his knack for satire and comedy, he wrote this as a portrayal of a fictional attempt by women from Ancient Greek to end the war by withholding sexual privileges with their husbands in order to stop the war until a treaty was signed. Albeit the play talking about a woman's needs with her spouses, the dialogue. talked about how men who focused on the war has been nothing but wasteful of the tax payer's money that women and the society contributed to, going back to Aristophanes' way of addressing the the financial effects of war, showing the frivolous nature of war and also the effects of wat on families.

Another example would be one of his well known plays "The Clouds". The Clouds was written as a political and philosophical satire on Socrates and his institution, which is also known as "The Clouds" Aristophanes used humour and exaggerated language to caricature Socrates' methods of inquiry and the perceived consequences of philosophical education. For example, here is a small dialogue from the play I read.

SOCRATES

Well now! what are you doing? are you reflecting?

STREPSIADES

Yes, by Posidon!

SOCRATES

What about?

STREPSIADES

Whether the bugs will entirely devour me.

SOCRATES

May death seize you, accursed man!

He turns aside again.

The play suggests that the pursuit of abstract knowledge and intellectualism can lead to moral and societal corruption, as The Cloud is about a man named Strepsiades who enrolled himself to Socrates' institution in order to avoid getting caught for his financial debts instead of trying his best to work things out and ethically clear out his debts. And in my opinion, activism doesn't always have to be something we do as a form of protest (physically done with marching), or an online post, or a drawing or photos but it could also be done in a form of writing. A script, a play, a book or a poem.

Refences

Nolas, S.M., Varvantakis, C. and Aruldoss, V., 2017. Political activism across the life course. Contemporary Social Science, 12(1-2), pp.1-12, viewed 22 November 2023.

Bisbe, M., Molner, E. and Jimenez, M., 2019. Public intellectuals, political satire and the birth of activist public relations: The case of Attic Comedy. Public Relations Review, 45(5), p.101790, viewed 23 November 2023

Foley, H.P., 1982. The" female intruder" reconsidered: Women in Aristophanes' Lysistrata and Ecclesiazusae. Classical Philology, 77(1), pp.1-21, viewed 19 November 2023

The Internet Classics Archive: The Clouds by aristophanes’, The Internet Classics Archive | The Clouds by Aristophanes, viewed 24 November, 2023, <http://classics.mit.edu/Aristophanes/clouds.html>

#mda20009 #social media #blogging #digital communities #week6 #activism #aristophanes #ancient history #ancient greece #ancient greek literature #ancient greek culture #ancient greek

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hammity-hammer · 8 months

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Trope rating game

rules: How much do these tropes affect your decision to click on a fic?

-10 -> very dissuaded 0 -> don’t care either way +10 -> very enticed nope -> if it’s a hard no and you’d never click on a fic with that tag or you even have the tag blocked or you’d insta click out of the fic if it wasn’t tagged. Bonus points for explaining the rating and whether it’s conditional.

tysm @thesolarangel for tagging me<33

see my answers under the cut:

Age gap: 0

i wouldn't like,,, not click it? but this does nothing for me & honestly i would rather not read them (but it's not going to stop me from reading a fic)

Codependency: +5

i cannot help but be a codependent bitch & i do love when they're obsessed w eachother-- but codependence is not good irl so i keep it to fics<3

Obsession/possessiveness/jealous: +10

AGAIN-- bad irl but i do love a good bit of possessiveness/obsession <33 as long as the person writing it knows that it's fucked up & if this shit happened irl it should be a hard no-- it's fiction & i eat it UP!

Opposites (grumpy/sunshine, etc.): 0

i feel indifferent! it's cute, but it's not like a deciding factor in whether or not i read something yk? i'd rather have them just be like close to their character & if that happens to be opposites then cool !!

Enemies to lovers/enemies with benefits: +3

this one is v cool & if i'm in a horny mood i eat it UP-- so it's usually a plus if i see it cjskckekc

Friends with benefits: +10

I LOVE <3 sometimes you just gotta fuck your friends yk???

Sex to feelings: +10

see above^ but also i just think it's nice sometimes hehehee

Fake dating/relationship: +100000

i am obsessed w the fake dating aus oh my god they are so good & just-- chef's kiss !

Friends to lovers: +10

i absolutely eat this shit up-- especially when there's some like not realizing there are romantic feelings?? yum!

Found family: +10

i love my found family shit<33 i'm a big believer that you choose your family & i absolutely fucking love it when my boys choose eachother over & over again<3

Hurt/comfort: +1000

i am a sadist AND a masochist so-- hurt/comfort is my favorite<3 bonus if it's actually hurt/no comfort bc i am fucked up!

Love triangle: -5

i'm not a fan of love triangles-- they're usually just dumb imo & like,, i'd rather everybody just get together yk?

Polyam/open relationship: +5

very cool!!! i love polyamory and getting to see people love openly & have conversations about it so<3

Mistaken/hidden identity: +10

okay these ones just hit different-- when someone doesn't realize who they're with??? yum!

Monsterfucking: +100000

i don't feel that i need to expand on this one-- it's a given

Pregnancy: 0

i feel neutral ab this-- if it happens it happens, but if there's sex AND pregnancy (like sex while pregnant) i'm usually going to click off

Second chance: +2

i'll read these bc of hurt/comfort-- but it really depends on WHY the second chance is being given yk?

Slowburn: +10

I LOVE SLOWBURNS! gimme like 20 chapters before they even kiss (do not i will cry make them kiss sooner pls)

Soulmates: +10000

i love soulmates<3 every soulmate au is one i will read bc i am obsessed w them and i just,,, i love them!

tagging (with no pressure!<3): @someforeignband @riality-check @dykesteddie @unclewaynemunson @singledadharrington @fagsculinity @a-little-unsteddie & anyone else who wants to do it!<3

#get to know ham #tag game!

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jmdbjk · 2 years

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Boy in Luv to boys in love?

Part Two.

(go back to pt. 1 here)

(nothing more manly man than standing at the urinal checkin’ out each other’s equipment, am I right?)

So now I am going to talk about something a little more meaty...Being homosexual in a heterosexual culture.

In these first years, we see how manly masculine males they were all trying to be. Tough men. Boy in Luv men. Stop-playing-with-me-if-you-lose-me-its-your-loss men (lets roll our eyes together 1-2-3 go). Hip hop and rap culture was (and still is) a heterosexual/misogynistic culture. Yet we know Namjoon was already a LGBTQ supporter when he helped a BigHit girl group write a pro-LGBTQ song before BTS’ debut. How to reconcile that with this music genre? Interesting to say the least. So here are our manly men in this manly man k-pop hip hop genre. And here we have Jungkookie and Jiminie who don’t know they will become our muscle bunny and chimchim. Boy in Luv MV released February 11 2014.

As far as BTS music and performances, they knew how to appeal to their fans. They obviously followed the k-pop idol formula in the beginning. Heterosexuality was a given. They put out a lot of songs appealing directly to “Miss Right.” The songs/lyrics and performances very noticeably targeted young female audiences. Example: War of Hormone...the lyrics... omg...cringe... and very heterosexual of them (reading the lyrics again...cringe again...sort of a blessing I didn’t look up the English translation the first time I heard it, right?). That being said, it is still one of my favorite MV’s, what can I say? Sorry? hahahaha! I love them in all their unabashed “bad” boyishness acting in this video. War of Hormone MV released October 2014.

This live performance of WoH is adorable, cheesy, and Jimin’s tongue again.

Setting aside the lyrics and intent of the song, I LOVE THE CHOREOGRAPHY! STOP JUDGING ME!

But that is them performing. That is their idol persona. That is their work. It’s called acting. It is not necessarily their real life personality. Some people have difficulty separating fact from fiction (looking at you antis, mantis, trolls, haters and cult people...)

When not working, which was hardly ever, they are seven, healthy, very fit, good looking, rowdy young men who pursued their various interests. They were surrounded by the idol industry with more physically fit and good looking humans. Even the security dudes are good looking. The whole industry is a conundrum with its sexually charged visuals yet the wholesome way idols are expected to live or at least be perceived to live. Korean societal norms are much more conservative, polite and reserved than us here in the U.S....(incidentally, BTS seemed to shuck off some of this idol identity but then they backtracked a little in some ways, ah another blog post...maybe someday.)

So as it happens, during off hours...you can only play so many video games right?... read so many books... be so pure... (haha they are not pure little innocents) ... young men being young men (a few of them teenagers and fresh out of puberty), hormones exist and do their thing on your body and your mind and I suspect they did what you do to relieve that. Masturbation happens. And stuff...

In 2015, they began doing V Lives and the precursor to Run BTS. Their V Lives were very short, sometimes only a minute long, done very quickly while waiting at the airport or waiting their turn in the makeup chair before a concert. Even during these we get a brief glimpse at the relationship dynamics.

April 2015: We are still sorta in the manly men mode Officer Kuk and Office Worker Jimin during the Dope MV.

July 2015: behind clip for NOW3, a photobook, that was shot in Chicago:

The stylists depart from the dark hip hop style and go for cotton candy colors. The eye make up was amazing, especially Jimin’s. I promise you, the regular people on the street in 2015 Chicago thought “look at those cute gay boys taking photos...”

August 2015:

Just wrapping up Brazil and on to Chile, South America, Jungkook says to Jimin: “Chile sounds like you want to hit me in Korean...” and Jimin ducking his head shyly and giggling? um, ok? V Live from August 1, 2015:

Tae and Hobi: “Jungkook, Jimin needs a birthday spanking”...things escalated quickly and the V Live was ended abruptly, um, excuse me? again, what was that? HAHAHAHAH! V Live from October 18, 2015:

(pause a sec...these little hints at a fetish go wayyyyy back....and is a whole blog post in and of itself...again, maybe someday)

Do I think it was possible that they ever “dated” female staff? Mmmm probably not? Jungkook was too young and too shy, even if he did have thoughts of wanting to date a girl. I know Jungkook has said he had a “girlfriend” but broke it off when they didn’t speak for a long time. Can we really consider that a real relationship when he was what? 14 or 15 years old or younger? No. Those were all words from a very young person who possibly believed it counted as a relationship as well as thinking that was what he was supposed to say.

But honestly, I don’t think there was much going on with any attempts of either of them dating other people back then because of how ambitious and committed to their work they were. Flirt maybe, but date? Nah. How the fuck are you supposed to “date” when you are working from the time you wake up to the time you go to sleep, if you even get to sleep? From what I understand, even the staff are worked to the bone. And possibly non-disclosure stuff, I don’t know what the labor laws are in Korea, if there are non-disclosure agreements then that would prohibit dilly dallying with staff. Yeah, naw, staff mingling wasn’t a thing.

In 2016 they were working on the Wings album. Between jacket photoshoots and MV shoots they are still touring. The first Bon Voyage series airs the summer of 2016 (filmed months prior).

July 2016 we get the Osaka V Lives. I watched Tae’s V Live the day before Jimin’s and I understand what everyone is theorizing but there really is no concrete evidence that Jimin was hiding in the bathroom of JK’s room...except that Jimin seemed perturbed at Tae the next day during his V Live. Here they are if you would like to watch them:

Tae’s V Live on July 12, 2016.

And Jimin’s V Live on July 13, 2016.

They win a major award for their Wings album in November and it’s obvious that they are very overwhelmed by it.

By the end of 2016 we get this chaotic December 15, 2016, V Live with the selfie Jungkook threatens to post to Twitter:

We start off 2017 with this February 7 V Live amongst other things right around Jungkook’s high school graduation:

And this cute V Live Twister game on February 13, 2017:

And then we get this February 28, 2017 Run BTS ep. 12...I know it was “acting” in a skit but y’all...the rough play and then JK slinging Jimin over his shoulder and the butt slap... the heavy flirting that was supposedly “ad libbed” was just...beyond words... it was just all too easy for them. Jimin and Jungkook’s segment begins at 8:41. This is what I mean by “chemistry.” They have it:

Their entire segment of that Run episode had me laughing so hard.

I’ve said before, I am pretty sure they crossed that line with each other at some point. Exactly when? We’ll never know but why wouldn’t they go with the flow and take that leap? Because they aren’t gay? Yeah, right.

Doesn’t matter if you are straight, gay, bi, or any other color/flavor of the rainbow... we know about sexual urges and libido and how the human body (and mind) works when one is horny. When and where though is really none of our business. We don’t know that. Regardless, I believe Something happened with a capital Sex with each other. Alcohol may have been in the mix. I am not gonna venture much farther than that because I am talking about real people but when in the moment, you can get carried away even if you didn’t intend to. I think it’s possible this happened even if they are straight up straight. Which I don’t think they are. But sex is sex and it happened in some form.

And in THAT process, they acted upon/confirmed things they either already knew about themselves or revelations occurred. I think in Jimin’s case it could have been more of a revelation. He’s stated some things that make me think he wasn’t really being true to himself at first. Maybe there was a lot of conflict and rejection before there was acceptance....he has said things that make me think this. This phase of self-discovery started and eventually Jimin blossomed into the Jimin we know. Thank God and Jesus and Dionysus.

Disclaimer #1: I am not gay. Surprise, surprise. Though I do appreciate the naked human body of any gender but I suppose that could be my artist’s eye I see the world with. Does looking at a naked female body turn me on? Perhaps. What does that make me? It makes me a horndog just like these guys. I have no idea and I do not know what it’s like to be a young person who might be confused about their sexuality. I can only speculate. Anyway, this isn’t about me...I digress...but see my point?

Back to the topic at hand. That’s the beauty of me sitting here pondering after watching 35,320 hours of BTS content. Something happened, that’s all I know!

So here we are, late 2017. These two Busan boys debut together and are now doing stuff several years later that they probably never thought in a million years they would be doing. Things were snowballing from 2016 through 2017... gaining momentum, not just their careers but whatever it was happening between these two.

go to Part Three...

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#jikook #minkook #kookmin #things ramped up quite a bit in 2017...#we are beginning to feel like we need to rewind and watch that again #just to make sure we saw what we saw...

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