#give me something that actually relates to me
Note
Hi congrats on the Milestone, for the event can i ask for prompts 15 and 16 (angsty ones) Ty! 💖💖
EAVESDROP [CLIMACTERIC]
/ˈiːvzdrɒp/
15. "You heard that?”
16. "I didn't mean it.”
WARNINGS: miscommunication (i hate and love miscommunication way too much), happy ending
spencer reid x gn!reader || fluff || 3.0k || event masterlist!!
a/n: when i said that these were going to be coming out slower i unfortunately meant it 😭 didn’t help that i had massive writer’s block with this one either rip—
main masterlist!!
You really didn’t mean to eavesdrop. You just happened to get to the office early that morning and figured it’d be an opportune time to make yourself some coffee.
But once you heard your name in the mix of the conversation that Spencer and Morgan were having you found yourself waiting around the corner until they finished what they had to say.
“—should just ask,”
“That’s awkward, besides, if I was going to then it’d have to be something more meaningful,” You can hear Spencer sigh in exasperation as he shuts down Morgan’s suggestion, and your imagination tells you he probably has his face furrowed almost in a pout like he usually does when he’s frustrated.
“Then plan something, you can’t just wait for something to happen, you have to take action man,” Morgan sounds determined in his beliefs, and it leaves you with a furrowed expression as you try and piece together what they’re talking about and how it relates back to you.
Spencer wants to ask you something. In a ‘meaningful’ way. Because he’s been sitting around waiting for something for too long.
What?
“I know that,” Spencer lets out another sigh, and you can hear the sound of his mug hitting the kitchenette counter. “I’m just afraid that they’re going to turn me down, okay? I really like them and I want this to go well,”
If their conversation was a tv show you would’ve rewound it to hear what Spencer just said again.
Spencer Reid. Dr Spencer Walter Reid just openly admitted to liking you.
There’s a major part of your brain that tells you that he just meant it platonically, that he just really valued your friendship and didn’t want to ruin it by asking you whatever he was going to.
And then there was another part of your brain telling you that that was complete bullshit, because what kind of question could possibly be so bad that it would mean you didn’t want to be friends with him anymore?
It had to be something inherently romantic, or Spencer’s concerns wouldn’t make any logical sense, which was a very off brand thing for him.
“It’ll never ‘go well’ if you don’t actually ask,”
The small flutter in your heart only proves to increase at Morgan’s reply, and if you were an actual part of the conversation you’d agree with him.
You wanted Spencer to ask you whatever was plaguing his mind, whether it be to take you on a date somewhere or even if it’s just to get lunch with him on your shared break. Any step forward was a step in the right direction, and you wanted that next step.
He doesn’t.
The whole day goes by without a single peep from Spencer in relation to his little pep talk with Morgan in the morning, and it was beginning to frustrate you just a little.
Of course you wouldn’t actually be frustrated if you hadn’t overheard the conversation they were having, but that wasn’t your fault. It was like the fates were trying to bring you together.
And you were letting them drag you in whatever direction they deemed fit.
“Hey Spencer!” You catch him right as he steps into the elevator, and he sticks out a hand over the motion sensor to keep the door open for you.
“Hey,” Spencer gives you a small, awkwardly endearing smile as you join him inside the elevator, retracting his hand to grip the strap of his messenger bag.
“Thanks,” You let out a stuttered exhale as you catch your breath from the mild jog you made to reach the door, pulling on the shoulders of your shirt to straighten it back out.
“No problem,” He gives you another small smile, and then the conversation falls silent, the sound of the doors opening as the two of you reach the ground level being the only thing to break the stillness of your joined company.
You couldn’t really tel whether the lack of conversation was awkward or not, but you did know that the longer you were in his sole company the more that you wanted to oust your knowledge of his earlier conversation with Morgan, to the point where you were rehearsing how to bring it up in your head.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Spencer gives you a small wave as the two of you step out of the elevator and into the covered parking lot, stuffing his hands into his pockets and turning around to walk away before you can reply.
You swear you catch the tiniest glimpse of him mouthing something to himself with a furrowed expression as he turns around, like he’s berating himself for something, and your brain decides that it’s the perfect time to just go for it, his name tumbling out of your mouth to no consciousness of your own.
“Spencer—”
He turns around at your call and your throat goes dry, your impulsiveness biting you right in the ass as you lose your confidence immediately under his gaze. “Yeah?”
“You… uh-” You watch as his eyebrows furrow slightly in confusion, and you clear your throat to throw your inhibitions out the window. You couldn’t just not tell him now. “I overheard the conversation you were having this morning with Morgan, the uh… the one about me?”
You can practically see the colour drain from his face at your admission, and it immediately makes you regret bringing it up. He wasn’t ready yet.
“You-” He lets out a sharp exhale through his mouth, tugging at the strap of his back awkwardly. “You heard that?”
You give him a small guilty nod with your lips pressed together, and he sucks in a breath like he’s forgotten how to breathe. “How much of it did you hear..?”
“About… three quarters of it,”
He shuts his eyes, head dropping until the hair framing his face catches against his eyelashes.
Of course you’d heard it all. Because him stumbling over himself over how to properly approach you to Morgan wasn’t humiliating enough.
No, you just had to be there to hear it.
There went any minuscule chance he had of actually managing to build something with you. You probably thought he was some weirdo who had some stalkerish fantasy of you.
“Spencer—”
“I didn’t mean it.” Your attempt at elaborating was very quickly short lived as he cuts you off.
“I- What?”
“I didn’t- I was just saying that to get Morgan off my back about not dating anyone,” Spencer knows he’s speaking straight out of his ass, but it’s the only thing that he can think of to say to possibly salvage a fraction of your friendship with him without making everything weird. “I didn’t actually mean any of it-”
There’s a small pause, silence flooding the space between you until you feel like you’re drowning in it.
“Oh,” There’s a split second where the astonishment shows across your face, and Spencer swears he catches a glimpse of disappointment in your irises before it’s covered up with something else. “Right- Yeah no that makes sense he can be quite annoying about that stuff can’t he?”
He gives a pathetic laugh at your response. “Yeah…”
“Well I’ll uh, see you tomorrow then…” There’s no mistaking the awkward tension between the two of you as you rifle in your pocket for your car keys.
“Yeah… See you tomorrow…”
—
“I messed up. I messed up really bad.” Morgan barely has time to leave the elevator before Spencer is practically dragging him into the conference room to speak to him privately, without any chance of their conversation being heard.
“Well good morning to you too boy genius,”
“I’m serious Morgan, this is really bad-” Spencer’s face conveys absolute desperation, almost bordering patheticness from just how rifled he seems.
“Okay okay damn,” Morgan raises his arms in surrender, a silent vow to take Spencer’s worries seriously.
“They overheard our conversation, the one about me being afraid to ask them out.” Spencer sighs in absolute indignation, taking a hand through his hair with an expression like his doctor just told him he wasn’t going to wake up tomorrow morning.
“Oh-” Morgan’s eyes widen slightly at Spencer’s confession, straightening up and furrowing his eyebrows. “And?”
“And I told them that I was just saying I wanted to ask them out to get you off my back about dating-”
Morgan’s shoulders drop, and he narrows his eyes slightly in a mix of confusion and absolute astoundment that he would fumble the bag that hard. “Why did you do that?”
“Because I didn’t want things to get awkward, but when they walked into the office this morning they didn’t even say good morning and we’ve been sat in a stalemate for almost ten minutes which suggests that they didn’t believe what I said and I did make it awkward and-”
“Reid-” Morgan holds up a hand to stop Spencer’s rambling mid-sentence. “Slow your roll a minute, what actually happened?”
“They caught me on the way out of the elevator to the parking lot yesterday and told me that they overheard our conversation,” Spencer drags his hand down his face in exasperation. “And I panicked and said that I didn’t mean it and that it was just to get you to stop asking me about my dating life, so that it wouldn’t make our friendship awkward…”
He exhales heavily, leaning his body weight against the conference table in defeat. “But I don’t think they believed me, and now they’re acting like I’m a stranger to them and I don’t know what to do,”
“Right… Okay,” Morgan takes a few seconds to take in the information through furrowed eyebrows. “And you’re sure it’s because they don’t believe you?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” It was Spencer’s turn to furrows his features at Morgan’s response. What else could it possibly be to do with?
“Look, I’m not going to say anything, but you need to come clean and talk to them, right now.”
“What—” Spencer barely gets the question out of his mouth before Morgan is leaving his side to open the door of the conference room and yelling your name across the bullpen to bring you over.
“What are you doing?” Spencer Whisper-yells through his teeth as he watches you approach from over Morgan’s shoulder, and he watches the way your curiosity turns to begrudgement as you realise that Morgan wasn’t the only one there.
You literally fizzled out after realising that Spencer was there, what else was he supposed to think?
“You two need to have a conversation,” Morgan points between the two of you before tugging you into the room by your forearm. “I am going to stand outside that door and you are not allowed to leave until you’ve spoken to each other properly, no bullshit. You hear me?”
It feels like you and Spencer are two five year olds as Morgan looks between you, but you both nod stuntedly either way, and true to his word, Morgan leaves the room and leans his weight against the closed door so you can’t push it open to leave.
“So…”
“So-”
The tension between the two of you is palpable as you both try to start the conversation at the same time, but the fact that you were so similar in your awkward attempts at breaking the silence makes you laugh a little, which in turn makes Spencer laugh as well.
It was a little silly, but you were both glad for the break in the stalemate you’d put yourselves in, even if just for that moment before you found yourselves surrounded by silence once more, albeit a slightly more comfortable one.
“Well… Uh…”
“I’m sorry I assumed you liked me, romantically I mean,” You cut off Spencer’s awkward attempt at breaking the silence with your own blurted excuse. “I didn’t mean to make things awkward between us I just thought—” You cut yourself short before you can finish to save yourself from your own embarrassment.
Spencer can only blink at your apology.
“I— What?”
“When I cornered you in the parking lot yesterday, I should’ve known it was just Morgan bothering you, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable,” You clasp your hands behind your back, nervously wringing your hands together.
So it wasn’t because you didn’t believe him. You did. And you looked… upset about it? Dejected maybe? Spencer couldn’t be quite sure, but whatever emotion you were displaying it wasn’t something objectively positive.
“I— You didn’t—” Spencer exhales heavily through his mouth, clenching his hands into fists as he internally fights with himself over whether to just spit it out and get it over with.
‘You need to come clean’.
Morgan sounded extremely assured in his statement when he directed Spencer earlier, like he knew what the outcome was going to be.
It wasn’t a case of ‘come clean because the truth is better than lying’, it was a ‘come clean because whatever happens afterwards isn’t going to be negative’.
“I lied to you,”
Spencer’s brain always worked faster than his body, but apparently he’d managed to override his own instincts and let his mouth make the decision for him before he could think through all of the possible consequences.
“…What?” The traces of disappointment in your eyes are diluted by a mix of surprise and confusion as you turn them up to his, and Spencer feels his throat dry out almost immediately.
“I wasn’t trying to get Morgan off my back, I…” Spencer lets out another small sigh. “I really was asking him for advice, I… I really like you, a lot, and I just didn’t know how to tell you without ruining our friendship so Morgan was trying to help,” He lets out a small laugh, his fingers raking through his hair animatedly as he laments his own patheticness. “It didn’t go very well, clearly,”
There’s a small pause after his confession, the silence settling in Spencer’s chest and making him feel nauseous as he waits for a sign of how you’re going to respond.
The blankness on your face isn’t very reassuring.
“You’re being serious?”
“…mhm…” Practically all of the conviction in Spencer’s tone disappears at your question, and he half-wishes that he could travel back in time so this conversation never happened.
“I like you too Spencer,”
“I underst—” Spencer lowers his head as he dejectedly accepts your rejection. Except it’s not a rejection. “What?”
“I like you too,” You repeat yourself with determination, your eyes practically boring holes into his, and he swears he can feel his knees trying to buckle underneath him.
“You uh… Really?” Spencer blinks at you like a deer in headlights, his genius brain seemingly unable to comprehend how the conversation, one Spencer was sure would end in your rejection and end with the two of you as practical strangers, somehow turned into this.
You give him a firm nod. “I’d like to go out with you Spencer, on a date, anywhere you like,” Your confidence starkly contrasts his shattered composure as you give him your proposal like you’re presenting in a board meeting. Although he’s sure it’s almost entirely feigned, and the way you fiddle with your fingers is evidence enough of his theory. “Please?”
There’s a tinge of desperation in your tone as you add your small plea at the end, and it makes Spencer realise that he’s just blankly staring at you.
“I— Yes— Yes I’d love to go on a date with you Uh—” Spencer thoroughly stumbles over his words in his rush to wipe the traces of doubt in your features. “I’d really like that…”
“Good— Good,” You let out a short laugh of relief at his answer, and he echoes it with your own as you stand in a shared dome of fluster together.
“Do you want to get lunch? Uh, together?” The way Spencer phrases the question was like a middle schooler trying to ask out their crush rather than a grown man, but it only makes the sentiment more endearing.
“That sounds like a good idea,” Your answer is joined by a soft laugh that echoes from the back of your throat, and it makes Spencer’s heart flutter.
“Okay,” Spencer returns your chuckle with his own, gesturing curtiously towards the closed door like a true gentleman, and you have to suppress the urge to stamp a kiss against his pink cheeks as you pass him to push it open.
There’s less resistance than there should be as you push it open, with Morgan decidedly having left the two of you to your own devices to return to his desk without either of you realising.
He shoots the two of you a wink and a thumbs up as you walk down the stairs, and Spencer’s cheeks turn a slightly darker shade of red at the ‘unfortunate’ realisation that he’s due in for a whole load of jests and teases from him going forward.
#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#spencer reid fluff#criminal minds fluff#mgg#climacteric 🪶
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vacation in camazotz
@rgbyshipper101
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“... keeps going like this, he’s going to end up dropping the house into another dimension again.” Danny sighed heavily.
“Well, that’s not really fair,” said Sam.
“Huh? What do you mean?” asked Danny, blinking blankly at her. “That’s definitely a thing he did.”
“Yeah, but that wasn’t totally him.”
“He was pretty tangential, actually,” said Tucker. “Unless there’s something you aren’t telling us?”
“I… haven’t I told you about the time he sent the house into a parallel dimension?”
“You didn’t exactly need to. We were all there.”
“No,” said Danny. “What are you guys talking about?”
“Yes, we were. The whole town was there,” said Tucker.
“You know,” prompted Sam. “Vlad pawning the Ring of Rage off on Valerie, you pulling Fright Knight’s sword out of the ground, Pariah Dark.”
“Yeah, you’re more related to us winding up in the Ghost Zone than your dad is.”
“Ooohhhh, I get what’s going on. You’re thinking of a completely different time. The time I’m talking about is way back in sixth grade.”
Sam’s gamer cave (she did not call it that, but that’s what it was) went quiet enough that the faint hum of the computer screens could be heard.
“Your dad sent you guys to another dimension when you were in sixth grade,” said Sam, spinning her chair around and pointing a painted fingernail at Danny.
“Yeah,” said Danny.
“Three years before your whole…” She waved her hand at him. “Thing.”
“Before you got zapped, she means,” said Tucker.
“Yeah. So?”
“So,” said Sam, “why is that, even though you knew alternate dimensions were a thing and your dad could get you there, you didn’t believe in ghosts and were okay with walking into the portal?”
“Okay, but, look,” said Danny. He put his controller to one side. “That’s– That’s a false equivalency.”
“Spending time with Jazz, I see,” said Tucker. He was now the only one still playing the game.
“Shut up,” said Danny. “I know stuff without Jazz telling me about it. But just because one unbelievable thing is true, that doesn’t mean that all unbelievable things are true. Besides, the dimension we wound up in was way different from the Ghost Zone. Had nothing to do with ghosts at all. Definitely not something you look at and then go, ah, yes, ghosts exist.”
“But you knew that other dimensions existed. Even if there weren’t ghosts on the other side of the portal, you still could’ve realized that it could take you to another dimension.”
“But it didn’t do that. It just half killed me.”
“By opening a portal to another dimension in you.”
“And?”
Sam glared at him. “You’re just playing dumb at this point.”
“Neither of you are playing anything, and I think at this point we can just say that Danny’s dumb.” Tucker’s computer let out a little jingle as his character completed a quest.
“Hey! Most of their stuff doesn’t work,” said Danny, exasperated.
“But you were messing around with something that they had made work before. Didn’t you think that could be dangerous? Or have consequences? Drop you in yet a different dimension? Something?”
“They said it didn’t work. I believed them. And you guys kept hassling me about it.”
“Someone skipped out on the ‘don’t give in to peer pressure’ PSAs,” said Tucker, singsong.
“You are not innocent here, Tucker! We’ve all done dumb stuff. Can we drop it? I thought we were playing games today, not playing ‘gang up on Danny for stuff we all did.’”
“Fine,” said Sam. She picked her controller back up. Danny picked his up a second later.
They continued playing the game.
Then Sam dropped her controller again, this time in her lap. “Okay, actually, this is going to bother the heck out of me if I don’t know. How did your Dad drop the house in an alternate dimension?”
“And what was it like?” added Tucker. He, of course, kept his eyes on the game.
“What was it like…” said Danny, contemplative. He made his character run around in circles. “How to explain?”
“Start with how you got there,” said Sam. “Go from there.”
“Okay. Well. It started off– It was pretty normal. You know.”
“Uh, no,” said Tucker. “Sending your house to another dimension is not normal.”
“Normal for them. For my parents.”
“Define normal here. Like, describe it,” said Tucker.
“Working on the portal.”
Sam let out a slow, exasperated sigh. “Really, Danny?”
“Well, it was that or weapons. Do you think their weapons teleported us to another dimension?”
“They could’ve. The bazooka does,” said Tucker.
“Fair,” said Danny. “But, like, they were working on the portal, but then they were going over some of the math - it was wrong, obviously - and they saw that there was, like, there was a, um. There was an ‘interesting result.’ Supposedly, distance fell out of the equation if you had the right inputs. Something like that.”
“Which means… what?” asked Sam.
“They thought they could make a teleporter.”
“What!” Tucker finally whirled away from his monitor. “They have a teleporter? They made a teleporter?”
“No. That’s the whole point. No teleporter. They messed it up. But, like, they built what they thought was a teleporter. And, of course, as soon as they built it, they had to use it. Mom wanted to do small tests, sending an apple back and forth or something, but Dad decided to jump right into teleporting the entire house, because it was vacation time.”
“Yeah, okay, that sounds like your dad,” said Tucker.
“Doesn’t it? Which is why I’m worried now, because it’s the same thing all over again, he keeps getting too excited and then doesn’t slow down to make sure things work the way they’re supposed to.”
“You have no right to criticize that, Mr. Walks Into a Portal and Dies,” said Sam.
“I think I’m the only one who does have the right to criticize it.”
“And the dimension?” asked Tucker. “I want to know about the alternate dimension.”
“Right,” said Danny. “Well, when Dad ‘teleported’ us, we knew things were wrong pretty much right away. You guys have read a Wrinkle in Time, right?”
“Sure,” said Sam.
“Yeah,” said Tucker. “It was assigned last year, wasn’t it?”
“Right, so, you know the planet with the brain? It was– It was kind of like that.” His character died and he sighed. “I suck at multitasking. It wasn’t even just the stuff, it was, like, the air was flat. The texture of everything was wrong. Everything was… fake? Like a performance, except it was the whole world. Everyone just had these smiles on their faces but they were… empty.”
Sam propped her head up on her fist. “Your parents sent you to play outside and didn’t notice any of that, didn’t they?”
“They did. But they did notice stuff. Like, all the houses being the same, the creepy sky–”
“The sky was creepy?”
“Super creepy. It was like. Segmented. Triangles. Like we were inside a pyramid. And all the roofs were also pyramids, now that I think about it. Just, pyramids everywhere. Really pointy ones. Oh! And gravity was also a pyramid.”
“What?” asked Sam.
“Gravity was a pyramid.”
“What does that even mean?”
“It was a pyramid. Gravity.”
“Okay, okay, I think I’ve got this,” said Tucker. “What shape is gravity here?”
“It’s round,” said Danny, “duh.”
“It’s round, so there you go, Sam,” said Tucker.
“It is round,” said Danny. “Like, gravitational fields, they’re round. But they were pyramids there.”
“Wow,” said Sam. “I wouldn’t have expected that. Pyramids.”
“See? Ghost Zone is totally different.”
“Yep,” said Tucker. His computer let out another chime. “By the way, you guys owe me soda now.”“How did you do that?” complained Danny. “You weren’t even looking at the screen!”
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(Inspired by @wolfstarmicrofic 's Alternative Universes theme! A sort of combined Performer AU and College AU🙂)
1058 words
Sirius Black's emotional break-up songs are topping the charts all over the world. But hearing those songs everywhere he goes, Remus is about to reach his breaking point.
With His Song
Home is where the heart is,
But it's not the concrete, nor the stone,
Not the room you sit in,
But the smile that lights it up.
Not the bed you sleep in,
But the heartbeat besides your own.
Home is where the heart is,
But it's not necessarily a place,
Sometimes, it's tracing the scars on someone's hand,
Sometimes, it's counting the freckles on someone's face.
It's been so long,
Coming home to you,
And did you know,
I could easily move on?
But the truth is,
I just don't want to.
If home is where the heart is,
Then baby, could it be,
That your home is still with me?
Mary lets out a sigh that seems to be coming from somewhere deep inside of her. “My god, I'm going to listen to that song on repeat for the rest of the week,” and after a moment she adds “potentially the rest of my life.”
“Then you're gonna have to get some headphones,” Remus says. “Because I'm already getting sick of hearing it.”
Mary gasps and clutches her chest. “Blasphemy!”
Remus gives her an unimpressed look. “I don't think you're using that word right.”
“‘Irreverence toward something considered sacred or inviolable’,” Mary states unfazed. “So yes, the perfect description of you insulting Sirius Black's music.”
Emmeline nods emphatically.
Remus sighs. “I'm not saying it's a bad song,” he says. “Just that I'm getting tired of hearing it everywhere, all the time.”
Mary opens her mouth to retort, but Emmeline interjects.
“I do sort of relate. It has gotten a painful tinge to hear the song, now that I know I won't be seeing Sirius Black perform it live…”
“You didn't get tickets for his show?” Marlene asks.
“No,” Emmeline sighs miserably. “I'm on the waiting list. Number 329.”
“Not as bad as Hestia. She's number 1550 or something.”
Emmeline shrugs. “In the end, it makes no difference. 329 or 1550, neither one of us is going to the concert. I mean, 329 people will have to die, and I don't reckon I'd be that lucky…”
“Emmeline!” Lily scolds.
“Well, that's the only excuse for not going to a Sirius Black concert, literally being dead,” Mary says. “I'd actually skip my mum’s funeral if I could see him live.”
“Mary!”
“No, no, Lils,” Emmeline says. “You don't know Mary's mum. If Mary were to miss out on seeing Sirius Black for her funeral, she'd actually come back from the death to haunt her.”
Mary nods. “She's a huge fan. Not going to a Sirius Black concert would be disrespecting her memory.” She glances over at Remus. “She might have some things to say as well if she hears that my actual roommate has openly disrespected Sirius Black’s music.”
Remus sticks out his tongue. “Sue me.”
“As soon as they create a law that makes depreciating Sirius Black illegal, which they should, I will!”
“Anyhow,” Emmeline says. “I haven't heard Sirius Black's voice for almost five minutes and I'm getting withdrawal symptoms,” and she reaches out to put the record back on.
Remus gets up to his feet. “That's my cue to leave.”
“You don't have to, Remus,” Lily says quickly. “If you really don't want us to, we won't put on his music. We value your company more than listening to Sirius Black.”
“Says who? Ow!” Emmeline rubs her shin where Lily kicked her.
Remus smiles at Lily. “Thanks, Lils, but it's okay. I have a paper I need to work on anyway.”
The moment Remus closes the door to his bedroom, he lets out a sigh that seems to be coming from somewhere deep inside of him.
Then, almost without thinking, he takes out his phone and punches in the number by heart.
“Hello?” The voice on the other end of the line sounds surprised and, dare Remus think, hopeful?
“You have to stop doing this,” Remus hears himself say. “No,” he then corrects himself. “You don't have to do anything. I'm asking you. Please stop doing this.”
“Remus, what are you talking about?” He seems to be walking away from something– A promo event? A fancy dinner? An exclusive party?– as Remus can hear the voices in the background grow softer. Remus feels a brief hint of satisfaction; no matter how big the event he's at, how important the people he's with, when Remus calls, he gets up and walks away to talk to him, but Remus quickly corrects himself, because it's not like that anymore.
“It's killing me,” Remus admits, pressing a hand against his forehead. “I understand, but… God, it's killing me.”
“Rem,” Sirius, because of course it's Sirius, says gently. “You're still not making much sense. What are you trying to say? Why are you suddenly calling me? Why… Why now?”
“Your latest releases,” Remus says, as he starts pacing the room, though he can barely take two steps before he reaches the opposite wall. It's rather telling of the difference between them, he can't help but think. Sirius undoubtedly in some grand building surrounded by dozens of people who would fall over themselves to cater to his every whim, and Remus hiding out in his eight square meter bedroom cluttered with textbooks and scribbled notes. “I get why you do it. I'm probably terribly biased,” he lets out a brief laugh. “But I think the songs you wrote when we were together, and even after we just broke up, are your best songs, so I get that you would want to release them, to share them with the world and show everyone once again just how bloody talented you are. And you have every right. They're your works, your creations. But gods, Sirius, I can't pretend anymore.”
“Pretend,” Sirius repeats, his voice almost a whisper, and Remus lets it all out.
“I can't pretend anymore that hearing those songs everywhere I go all the damn time doesn't make me want to die! That it doesn't just break me, to hear your voice sing those words, knowing what they once meant, and knowing that they don't mean that anymore! That you don't mean that anymore.”
“Remus,” Sirius interrupts sharply, and Remus immediately stops talking as Sirius speaks. “Do you really think I could sing those words like that, if I didn't still feel that way?”
And Remus’ breath catches in his throat.
#famous sirius black#singer sirius black#post breakup#academic remus lupin#wolfstar#wolfstar fanfiction#wolfstar fic#marauders#marauders fanfiction#marauders fic#sirius black#remus lupin#remus x sirius
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Niffty Redesign! (3/7)
Holy shit was not expecting to finish in the same day much less in like… under 4 hours??? IDK IM HAPPY WITH HER THOUGH!!!!
My biggest inspiration this time was lovebugs and specifically this LPS lovebug
Yes im colour picking Niffty from a littlest pet shop. Who is gonna stop me? Hasbro? They don’t even own LPS anymore!
Im making Niffty a bit tanner because while I see it a lot in other fandoms, I don’t ever see tan asian people in the Hazbin fandom, tbh this place seems like its allergic to melanin in general. There’s also a lot of stigmatisation around POC women in Hazbin like I’ve mentioned before. I plan on having Niffty deal with a decent chunk of stuff later on, a lot of it relating to obessions and romance and learning how to manage feelings like that and keep relationships with other people.
I wanted her socks to be cute but also held up by a garter belt so you can gather she’s got something going on. People seem to stray away from the topic of Niffty and sex or romance because they see her as a child or have infantalised her in some way. Yes ik I talk about this all the time but like GOD it pisses me off.
Her maid dress is actually a much darker shade of hot pink to the point its not really hot pink anymore but it is I promise
Niffty’s main sins are lust, wrath, and envy, seeing as she is a lovebug and also her current backstory is killing a lover out of jealousy. The redder pink parts are supposed to be a mix of lust and wrath so I hope that comes across well?
The same thing can be said about her clothes and all that. With her dress and the reddish hearts it’s supposed to be like “in one sin there’s another” but idk how well I pulled it off. The stitched up heart is also supposed to represent her hopeful/eventually redemption. I’d like to give Niffty more character than just “crazy small lady” so I’ll be trying to balance being somewhat like that with also being a bit sensible. I think it definitely could be done but I have doubts Viv will do much with it.
It really sucks that the POC characters and especially women they just get reduced to one or two traits and then thats it. Viv already is terrible at writing women and I think writing Niffty for her is just boring because, again, she cannot write women. 90% of this rewrite is me saving the women/hj
There will be more indepth Niffty content from me eventually, as of now this is my backbone for her design and overall story. Btw I think her rubber gloves are cute but make really annoying squeaking sounds 24/7. No idea if I’ll pull off another fast design like this, but we shall see!🐐
#hazbin hotel#hazbin critical#hazbin hotel criticism#hazbin hotel critical#hazbin niffty#niffty hazbin hotel#niffty#hazbin nifty#nifty hazbin hotel#nifty#hazbin hotel rework#hazbin hotel rewrite#hazbin hotel redesign#hazbin rework#hazbin rewrite#hazbin redesign#my art#anti vivziepop#anti hazbin#anti hazbin hotel
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WHO AM I??
Hi baby
I’m going to talk a little bit about myself
I don’t wanna reveal too much
My face and everything else will remain anonymous for safety and privacy💕
Name:
My name is Honey(yes this is my birth name lol)
You can call me by my name or honeybee
Or even honeycomb
Do NOT call me beehive 😡
Unless it’s related to Beyoncè💕
Age: 23
Topics:
I discuss the void state, Law of assumption,Reality Shifting (I haven’t talked about this yet but will if you need more info)
And All kinds of Manifestation methods
How to talk to Honey!!!
Just dm me any questions I don’t take asks anymore so if you have any questions just feel free to dm me
Ethnicity/Nationality
My mom is Afro Peruvian, Indian,and Haitian
My dad is Jamaican
Sooo
I’m black hehe🤟🏾
I don’t do these I’m super private it’s soooo weird omg
What do I like??
Music food animals
Did I say music because
MUSIC!!!!!!
My favorite artists
I love all kinds of music
Even death metal occasionally
I like Harry Styles,Kid Cudi,Lady Gaga The Beatles,Ice Spice and many moreeeee
I also love movies
Literally almost any kind
But anyways
Let’s talk about something more interesting!!
Now that you know me(kind of)
I want you to know about this technique I discovered
It’s not new at all
In fact ppl on here have already talked about it I’m just late
As usual 😔
Anywayyyyyy
There’s a technique I want you all to try
It’s called the
“Wim hof breathing”
Method
No methods are needed But if you really want one
Then here you go pookie
(Found this on a website but it won’t let me copy the link😔)
WIM HOF BREATHING METHOD
Find a comfortable position.
Breathe in deeply through the nose or mouth and through the belly to the chest. Then let the breath go unforced.
Exhale through the mouth, then immediately breathe in again.
Take 30–40 such breaths in short bursts.
Take one final, deep inhalation then let the air out and stop inhaling. Hold the breath until you feel the urge to breathe again.
Inhale very deeply to full capacity and hold for 15 seconds, then let it go. This completes the first round.
Repeat the whole process, steps #2-6, 3-4 times.
After completion take time to meditate and enjoy the state of deep relaxation
After the very last step you should be a deep trance like state you should be really relaxed
I recommend that you let your next subliminal play
Which should be
Either a theta or epilson wave track or pink noise
Make sure your desired subliminal that plays after is Not a guided meditation you wanna still be in a trance
Start affirming in that point
And don’t stop
Just feel how relaxed you are feel that powerless body but powerful mind
Your body is at ease your soul and mind collide in such ways that allows you to breathe freely without any stress no harm
In the void state
Your main goal should be getting peace
Because if you’re entering just affirm
You’ll likely put it on a pedestal you’ll get frustrated and give up
It is not a wish granter bitch
It’s you
Baby you are powerful
Baby you are pretty
Baby you can tap in the void
And make the bring the 4D to your 3D and make it your home
Don’t use the void as a wish granter
Use it for peace
Don’t treat the 3D like the enemy
Treat it like a friend
After all it exists the way it does because of your assumptions
Whether you say this is hard or this is easy
Sugar, you’re right either way
Because if you assume something then that’s how it’ll be
If you think you’re pretty you’re pretty
But if you think you’re broke
Then you’re broke
If you think you’re rich
Then you’re rich baby
You could have wings
Superpowers
Be the biggest singer or rapper in the world
Star in the next Dune Movie
Be best friends with Ariana Grande
Be a Scientist
Be smarter than Albert Einstein(I mean was he actually super intelligent if he lacked common sense)
You could be get a bigger butt!!
I mean didn’t necessarily have a pancake ass
But I definitely didn’t have a Nicki Minaj
BUT I DO NOW!!!!
And bestie you can too!
Plastic surgery who???
Do we look like a Kardashian-Jenner?? I think the f not🙄
The void is our plastic surgeon
You wanna a smaller nose?
Got it
Tig ole biddies?
Got it
Nicki Minaj butt?
Got it
Floor length hair?
Got it?
Whatever you want to change about yourself
Got it!
And for the last time babies
You ALWAYS ENTER THE VOID EVERYTIME YOU SLEEP
Mentally just be
Physically sleep
In that moment baby
Forget the 3D and its fuck ass bob
Because the 3Ds not your enemy but its your puppet
You’re a ventriloquist CONTROL THAT MF
The 4D is you
The void is you
Quit saying what you can’t do babe
You CAN BECAUSE YOU ALREADY DID AND YOU STILL DO
“HoNEy I StiLL didNT gET inTO tHe vOiD”
YES YOU DID!!!!!!
You did it
You just didn’t know
Bro the void is just recognizing you’re asleep
And getting in contact with your mind
Which is where you already go when you go to sleep
So ha
Billie
There’s your answer
When we fall asleep
That’s where we go
The mf Void State
The only thing your cute ass has to do baby
Is just be aware
When Neville Goddard says just “BE”
Bitch just BE
That’s it
Be aware
Like that SpongeBob episode
“Be the crane”
Be the Void
It’s just you love
So why you stressing
Why complicate something YOU created?!
Baby girl make it make sense
Own your power bitch
I love you My darlings
Month is almost over
Bring me my success stories
Or I’ll be your sleep paralysis demon 😈
(Just kidding)
Or am I;)
NOW BITCH LOOK!!!!
YAYYYY
Imma keep pressuring you to listen to this(NOTE YOU DO NOT NEED SUBLIMINALS)
But I like this one🫠
Wrong emoji
I can’t find that cute one at the moment I’m rushing cuz I wanna eat my burger!
SLADE:
https://youtu.be/oKU8YIicYQg?feature=shared
THIS
because it’s soooo peaceful
Slade is the best
BYE BITCH GO GET THAT DREAM LIFE NOW!!!
I love you ⭐️💕
youtube
#law of assumption#law of attraction#void state#void#law of manifestation#manifesting#manifesation#subliminals#loassblog#loassumption#reality shift#desired reality#reality shifting#dream life#desired life#loablr#loa success#loa blog#loa tumblr#law of the universe#manifesting affirm and persist#robotically affirming#affirm and persist#affirmation#meditating#guided meditation#meditation#void success#Youtube
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第二章 | Moving and Meeting the Boss
warnings; age gap love(R: 23, S:39, T: 50), gxg, throuple, controversial age gaps, random German and Scottish pet names, topics of eating that aren't ED related, but might be triggering to some, DeepL translated languages. Untranslated Chinese, French, and other languages
note; okay! second chapter is now ready. I might start another series based on driver x reader x wag. I sort of rushed through this. I also changed a couple of things
She now contracted meningitis during her F2 days and that was the reason for her leaving, but she told people it was the lack of funds
There has something to do with eating, but it's not an ED
The eating thing is based off of a very adorable mukbang YouTuber named Tzuyang. I also never been to Monaco, so Idk how everything works
Realized she should have a last name since she's Felix's sister
note2; please give me requests for moodboards, blurbs, smaus, or anything else you want for this series. Or just request anything as long as you read my rules and how to request thing
fc; imleslie(Y/n), xavier serrano(Aaron Antognelli), blanca soler(Chiara Lorenzi)
Come Talk to Me | Driven by Destiny Masterlist
Autosports Masterlist | Main Masterlist | Toto Masterlist
I do not give anyone permission to change, copy, or put my work on any other platform. It will only be on top, so if you see it, please report it. Or let me know.
DO NOT ask me to update this story. I'll update when I can.
Anyway, only accepting 10 more people to be tagged
Buckle up! This is a long one!!!!!!!!
(My god, Susie is so fucking pretty that I might actually cry)
In the now packed-up house, Y/n gazed around. "Are you all packed up?" Her brother asked as he crossed his arms next to her. Chan sighed, "I'm going to miss coming over to your house and hanging out," he said, looking around the house. With a soft smile that showed off her sharp teeth, Y/n looked at her brother, "He'll miss popping by my house during random times when the homeless orphans don't have work to do and mooching off me until he needs to go home to Korea." Y/n teased, pinching his freckled cheeks.
Chan giggled at Felix's expression and looked away, clearing his throat when Felix's glare turned to him. The long-haired male slapped his sister's hand away gently and tried to keep his scowl before giving up and breaking out into smiles as laughs filled the room. "For real though, I am going to miss you." Felix said, opening his arms for Y/n to enter, "Aw, I'm going to miss you too, but you can come visit me anytime you want in Monaco." Y/n offered, pulling back.
"You too, Channie. You and the rest of the derelict unparented are free to come visit me in Monaco when you want." Y/n said, opening her arms up to the shorter male. "Why does this feel like I'm sending my little sister off?" Chan asked, gladly accepting the hug that was offered, "You are basically family, mate." Felix assured, wrapping his arms around both his sister and his best friend. The group continued to hug until there was a loud honk heard in front of the house, "Well, I guess we should get this stuff into the truck." Y/n said, letting go of the two singers to grab one of the nearest boxes.
Y/n lugged the box to the truck where a mover stood, ready to grab the box from her hands and put it in the truck, "I'll take that, sir." The worker offered. Y/n froze and stared at the mover, "Excuse me?" Y/n asked, "Oh? Did I say something wrong?" The worker questioned, looking at Y/n with a raised eyebrow, "I am not a man. Please don't assume because I have masculine features." Y/n said, steeling her nerves. Y/n wasn't a confrontational person, but over the years, resentment had built up enough for her to tell someone off when they called her a man.
Her boobs were prominent enough for people to know that she wasn't a man and she was wearing a sports bra with flannel, how the hell did the man assume she was one as well? "I'm sorry, I didn't know--" "I think you did know, but it's whatever. Don't do it again." Y/n huffed, turning around and walking away.
Y/n entered the home again and grabbed a box aggressively, huffing dramatically. Felix and Chan shared looks before putting the boxes they had in their possession down, "Hey, what's wrong?" Chan questioned.
Y/n shook her head, taking deep breaths to calm herself down. She sometimes felt like it was irrational of her to get so upset by someone assuming she was a man, but at the same time, anyone would get upset by being called the wrong gender.
Y/n squared her shoulders and picked up another box before turning to look at the two with a smile, "It's nothing, mate. Just a bit of an annoyance." Y/n then turned and walked out with the box in her hands.
The trio made their way back and forth until all the boxes were in the truck. Now, they stood on the lawn watching as the movers grabbed the furniture and loaded it onto the truck, "Y'know, we're actually going to miss you." Chan spoke up, continuing to watch the movers work. "I know. That's why I said you're free to visit me in Monaco. I'll also try to visit you and in Seoul whenever I can." Y/n assured, throwing her arms around each of the boy's shoulders and giving them an awkward side hug.
"We know. We'll try to visit when we can too." Felix said, laying his head on her arm with Changbin following suit, "We're done, ma'am. We'll be taking this to the sea freight now unless there is something else you need." The mover looked at the tall half-Asian with a pointed look, asking if there was anything she needed or if were they good.
"You're good to go. Thank you." Y/n said, nodding at the mover. The trio watched as the movers packed up and drove away, "What time do you leave?" Felix asked after a few moments of silence, "Three o'clock in the morning. Seeing as my insomnia is so bad that I can't fall asleep, I'll probably be up and out by two. Do you mind dropping my keys off at the realtor office safe drop box? I won't be able to do it since I leave at three." Y/n said.
"Yeah, we can do that. We'll be dropping you off anyway." Chan nodded, shoving his hands into his pockets.
⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙
"Yah, wake up. It's two." Felix hissed as if there were others in the house.
Y/n groaned and swatted Felix's hands away before turning onto her side and snuggling into the blankets, "Y/n, it's time to wake up." Chan said, joining Felix at the side of the hotel bed Y/n was sleeping in. The two put their hands on her and looked at each other, nodding before violently shaking Y/n back and forth.
"搞什么鬼?!" Y/n yelled in Chinese after being woken up so violently, turning to stare at her brothers with wide eyes, "Sorry, you wouldn't wake up, so we decided to shake you until you woke up." Chan snickered, signing as he spoke, looking away as Y/n glared at him and Felix.
Y/n sighed and threw the blankets off of her body, "Jesus, dude. You could've kept trying to wake me up gently." The dark-haired woman scowled, reaching over to grab the external part of her cochlear implant and the hearing aid for her other ear. Felix grabbed the hearing aid and helped her put it into her ear, "When are you getting your other cochlear?" Felix questioned, making sure the volume was on the level Y/n always kept it on.
"I get the second implant after I start my new job. I'll have to tell the boss about it as soon I do the interview. Especially since I forgot to tell her about my lack of hearing." Y/n mumbled, looking at Chan and Felix from the side since she knew that they would be giving her judgy looks.
Y/n turned to see that they were indeed giving her disappointed looks as if she wasn't taller than Chan, older than Felix, and more intimidating than the both of them combined. "Stop looking at me like that! I was trying to get the application in as fast as I could. I simply just...forgot to put it on my application." Y/n explained, looking down and scratching her cheek. When she looked back up, they were still looking at her with disappointment, "Stop looking at me like you're my parents and I just got caught smoking a fat one....or something cause I wouldn't know how they would look at me." Y/n quickly added the second part and gave the two boys a awkward smile.
Felix and Chan sighed in unison, "Okay, well, I guess we can't really be that upset with you since you'll be telling her face-to-face. Get up and get ready. Felix picked out some clothes for you to wear." Chan said, pointing to the end of the bed where some clothes were laid out for her, Y/n sighed, running a hand through her thick hair, "Okay, whatever. Please move out of the way."
Chan stepped back as Y/n swung her long legs over the side of the bed and planted her feet onto the floor, grabbing the clothes and studying them before going to the bathroom to get changed while Felix and Chan checked to make sure that everything was properly packed. Y/n exited the bathroom wearing a pair of high waisted brown trousers, a white collared button down with a brown, beige and white sweater vest one top.
Y/n sat down on the bed and picked up the socks that were sitting on the bed, putting them on while Felix and Chan continued to talk, "Y/n, do you want to get some McDonald's on the way or something?" Felix asked.
"I just want a coffee and a bagel honestly. We can get something from the bagel shop nearby. I heard they have some good bagels and coffee." Y/n suggested, putting on her boots and grabbing the glasses that were on the nightstand next to the bed. "I'm down." Chan said, looking to Felix, "I'm okay with that." The blonde shrugged, grabbing Y/n's suitcase and pulling it out into the hallway.
Y/n stood up and looked around, making sure that she had left nothing on the ground
⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙
Y/n turned and looked at her brother as she got ready to board the plane, "Okay, so you'll call when you've landed in Monaco, right?" Felix inquired, holding her wrists lightly. Y/n rolled her eyes and chuckled, "I promise that I'll call you as soon as I get to my new home in Monaco. Don't worry about me. Just make sure that you take care of yourself. All of you." Y/n gave a pointed look at Chan.
"What? Why'd you look at me like that?" Chan chuckled nervously, "I'm telling you to take care of yourself. You tend not to do that." Y/n joked, looking him in the side. Chan jumped away as if he was shocked and held his side, "No promises, but I'll try."
"Flight 35 A is now boarding."
Y/n looked over at where people were beginning to line up, "Alright, it seems I've got to go." The girl pointed behind her with a thumb. Felix pulled his sister into a hug and laid his head on her shoulder, "You better call me when you land. I'll fly to Monaco myself if you don't." He said voice muffled into her sweater vest.
"Okay, let go. I have to board." Y/n groaned, pushing the blonde away from her playfully, "See you, Y/n." Chan said, giving the girl a quick hug. Y/n grabbed her carry-on and boarded the plane, "Make sure the other Stray Animals are around when I call. I want to talk to all of you." Y/n spoke.
After a long flight, of which she slept through most, she hopped off the flight feeling groggy and completely disoriented. To be quite honest, she just wanted to go to sleep in a bed with thick blankets and the fan blasting on her face so she didn't overheat while sleeping. The thing was, she wouldn't be able to meet up with the person who sold her the house until the next day because the offices were closed and her stuff wouldn't arrive until the next day either, so she had to get a hotel for the night.
Y/n groaned as she rolled her neck, attempting to massage the stiffness out of her shoulder and neck as she entered the Uber, "Uh, Hôtel Fairmont Monte Carlo, s'il vous plaît." Y/n spoke in a tired and dull tone.
The driver nodded and pulled off. Y/n pulled out her phone and pressed on the contact of the one person she knew would be up. It was 9:41 PM in Monaco, which meant it was 4:41 AM in Seoul currently and there was one person she could guarantee would be up at that time.
Chan.
Y/n pulled out a pair of headphones with a large-diameter ear cup that completely encloses her ear and audio processor and put them on. Y/n looked out the window while the phone rang, "Hey! You're in Monaco, I'm guessing." Chan said as his face popped up on the screen. "Yeah, I'm in an Uber right now. I'm heading to the hotel." Y/n mumbled, mouth stretching into a little yawn.
"Oh, yeah. Your stuff isn't there yet, is it?" Chan asked, looking at something off to the side, "No, it'll be arriving tomorrow afternoon. I'll be contacting Mrs. Wolff tomorrow as well to schedule the interview. The jet lag was going to be a bitch." Y/n sighed, leaning against the window. "Yeah, it is. What time is it there?" Chan questioned, "It's, uh, 9:43 PM." Y/n answered, dragging her eyes away from the fogged-up window to the face on her phone.
"Have you eaten?" Chan questioned, "No, not yet. Have you?" Y/n raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, I ate some ramen earlier. I'm just snacking on some honey butter chips right now." Chan responded, lifting the yellow bag to the screen.
Y/n opened her mouth to say something, but she was interrupted by the driver, "Madame, nous sommes arrivés à votre destination."
Y/n looked out the window and saw they were indeed in front of the luxury hotel, "D'accord, merci, monsieur. Je vous souhaite une excellente soirée. Sorry, Chan. I have to go. Tell Lixie and the others to text me when they can." Y/n said, exiting the car.
"Okay, I will. Have a good night." Chan said, "Have a good day, mate." Y/n said before hanging up. Y/n pocketed her phone and grabbed her items from the trunk. She waved at the driver in thanks and made her way into the hotel. It was a random one that she picked out and it was probably way too luxurious for a one-night stay, but it was the closest to where her new home would be and she was way too tired to find an even cheaper hotel.
She checked in and paid for the room, trudging up the stairs in a slumped-over position. As soon as she found her room, she stood up and unlocked it as if she was being followed by someone and had to enter quickly. Y/n threw the door open and closed, dropping her bags where she stood before making her way to the bed and getting in
Y/n woke up the next day and immediately ordered an Uber. Her items would be arriving today and she already slept in pretty late. Y/n's dark brown eyes swept the room until they landed on the digital clock on the dresser. It was 2:52 PM. The truck with her stuff would be there around four and the realtor would be there around 3:00, so she had to get going pretty quickly. Luckily, her Uber was on its way and she would be at her new address in no time.
Honk!
Y/n's head snapped up once she had heard the honking of the horn. She could only assume that they were there for her and the chime from her phone telling her that her ride has arrived only confirmed her suspicion. Y/n quickly gathered her items and sped and walked out of the front of the building with her hand up in a wave to show that it was her who had ordered the Uber. Y/n pulled up the trunk after the driver had opened it from the inside of the car.
Y/n put her suitcase and carry-on bag into the trunk and closed it, rushing to get to the backseat and get into the car. "Bonjour, Monsieur. Monaco, La Condamine, 98000 Monaco, s'il vous plaît." Y/n said breathily, pulling her phone out of the bag she had and opening the notes app. Seeing as she would have to move all of her stuff in, of course with the help of the moving pros, and there were some other things she needed to do through the day, she decided that it would be a good idea to make a to-do list.
To do for today and tomorrow
Move my stuff into the house
Rearrange everything to my liking
Unpack everything
Go grocery shopping
Call Mrs. Wolff back
Y/n reread the list over and over to see if anything else came to mind, but when nothing did, she pocketed her phone again and stared out the window. Monaco was a truly gorgeous place and she could see herself living out the rest of her life in this beautiful country.
She could definitely see herself finding a man or woman, who would most definitely be an F1 fan seeing as the country basically lived and breathed F1, finding a much better home, settling down, and having a family.
It wasn't something she wanted anytime soon since she was still pretty young, but it was something she could see happening when she was ready.
Actually, now that Y/n thought about it, and as the car passed by the water, she doesn't think any house, which was actually one of those apartments where you have a whole floor to yourself, would be better than the one she got. It cost an arm and a leg to get and she would be able to afford it after she finally started the PA position.
The flat included three bedrooms, one bathroom, two shower rooms, one separate toilet and a kitchen. In total, it has four rooms. Two underground parking spaces provide space for any vehicles and a balcony that overlooked the water. It that high street, city center, bus station, and shopping center all within 500 m, so it was well situated.
Y/n sighed and closed her eyes. This was the start of her new life. While she was is Monaco, she was going to be a different person then what she was in Australia. Gone is the shy, antisocial, introverted girl that lived in Sydney and in is the girl who is still the same thing, but trying to be more confident.
"Pardonnez-moi, madame. Nous sommes arrivés." The driver announced, "Hm? Oh, merci beaucoup." Y/n thanked as she exited the car. She waited until the driver popped the trunk and then grabbed her things, "Merci encore, madame. J'espère que vous passerez une excellente soirée."
The driver gave Y/n a smile, "C'est très gentil de votre part. J'espère que vous passerez également une excellente soirée." She responded before driving off, giving Y/n a wave as she drove off.
"Miss Lee?" A voice with a thick accent called out from behind her. Y/n whirled around to face a tall man with dark, curly hair, a chisled jaw, and broad shoulders. It was the realtor, "Ah, Mr. Tomatis. How are you doing today?" Y/n greeted, looking to the side so she didn't make eye contact. "I am well. Listen, I would love to stay and talk with you, but I have an important showing to do, so here's your keys. Enjoy your new home." Mr. Tomatis gently place the keys into her hands before walking off.
"Oh-kay. Guess it's time to check out the new place in person." Y/n took a deep breath, trilling as she exhaled. The girl made her way into the building until she reached her floor. Y/n put the key into the door and unlocked it, "Home sweet home, I guess. Once I step through this door, my new life officially starts." Y/n mumbled, resting her forehead against the cool wood. Y/n opened the door and wheeled her suitcase in behind her, "Woah, this is sick!" Y/n awed, looking around her home.
She left the suitcase and carry-on near the entrance and walked around, looking through each room and mentally mapping what went into each room and how she would lay everything out.
Once she was done with her mental mapping, her hands fell to her sides and she looked around with a flat face and eyes dulled due to boredom.
She didn't know what to do now.
The truck wouldn't be there until four and it was only... Y/n looked down at the screen of her phone, which displayed the time in a large blue font...3:12.
Suddenly, an idea popped into Y/n's head. She had to schedule the interview and was advised to do so once she was settled down enough, but since she had time to waste, why not do it now? Y/n opened her contacts and pressed on Susie's, making sure it was on speaker, "Hello?" The sweet Irish voice that Y/n had heard last time, answered the phone.
"Uh, yes. It's Y/n Lee. I'm calling to set up my interview for the PA position." Y/n stammered, "Oh, Ms. Lee! I've been expecting your call back. I assume that means you're in Monaco?" Susie asked, "Yeah, uh, yes...ma'am." Y/n confirmed, nodding as of the woman on the other line could see her.
"Great, I know that you're going to need some time to settle down completely, so the interview will not be taking place any time this week. How about the next week around 10:00 AM? What day works for you?" Susie questioned, "I can do next week. How about Wednesday?" Y/n pulled out a pen and pad of paper to write down the date and time. "Wednesday works perfectly. Alright, I will e you then." Susie said.
"See you then." Y/n confirmed before pressing the 'end call' button. Just as Y/n put her phone on the counter, she got another call but this time from the company that had her stuff, telling her that they had arrived early and were ready to move her stuff in.
Y/n ran out the front door and down the stairs to see that they had indeed arrived earlier than planned and were already beginning to unload the lighter stuff, "Hey, I didn't expect you to be so early. Please, follow me and I'll show you where my apartment is." Y/n said, grabbing a box and leading the way to her floor.
After showing the movers where she was, Y/n went back down to grab another, but before she could make it too far, someone stopped her. "Hey, I couldn't help but notice you're moving in. Do you want some help?" A tall slender man with dark hair and dark eyes. The man in front of her was the very definition of tall, dark, and handsome and Y/n was the definition of awkward around pretty people.
Y/n opened her mouth to decline, probably stutter through the sentence before falling too embarrassed to continue speaking, when another voice spoke up. "Babe, what are you doing? Who's this?" A woman who absolutely gorgeous saddeled herself next to the man, looking up at Y/n with a raised, perfectly sculpted, eyebrow. "I-uh..." Y/n's eyes darted around frantically, trying to find any way out of the situation.
She knew she said she was going to be a totally different person than she was in Australia, but she had the worst night of sleep where her body got too hot with the blankets, too cold with the fan, and still too hot with both. She also kept waking up randomly during the night, feeling dizzy and disoriented. She also may be up and doing things, but she was severely jet lagged and wanted to do nothing, but drop dead on the floor and sleep until she could physically no longer sleep.
Y/n was going to be quite honest, she could use the help and it would make things go a lot faster, but how was she, a socially awkward person, to talk to two very pretty people?
Answer; she didn't.
She walked past them with a quick 'excuse me' pretending like she didn't hear them. If they got upset with her, she'll just say her hearing aids weren't on or turned up enough for her to hear that they were speaking to her. "Wait! Ma'am, hold on." The man called out, following Y/n outside and grabbing her wrist gently, stopping her in her tracks. Y/n steeled herself and whirled around with a fake smile, "Oh, sorry. Can I, uh, can I help you?" Y/n asked, eyes darting between the man, who was giving her a smile, and the woman, who was scowling at her with her arms crossed.
"Yes, you can help us. My boyfriend asked you a question and you just walked past us as if you didn't hear. Are you deaf or something?" The girl sneered.
"Yes."
"Pa-pardon?" The girl asked, dropping her arms, Y/n turned her head to the side, showing the couple her cochlear and the the hearing aid, "I-I am in fact...deaf." Y/n muttered, turning to go get more boxes. Behind her she could hear the flustered man scolding his girlfriend while she stammered out flustered responses,
"How could you-?!"
"I..I didn't know, okay? Hop off my balls."
"Woman, what balls would I be hopping off of?"
"I... You... Just shut up! We should be helping anyway."
The two stopped their flustered play fighting as Y/n walked past. They both grabbed boxes and followed her, "Hey, we are so sorry." The man spoke up, speed walking so he was next to Y/n, "Especially me. I didn't know you were actually deaf and even if you weren't, I wasn't being the nicest. It's just, and this isn't an excuse, there have been some... how do I say this?" The girl asked, looking up.
"Issues." The man supplied, the woman snapped her fingers and pointed at her boyfriend before quickly putting her hand back under the box as it began to tip over in her hands, "Issues. We have had some issues with our last neighbours and it made me sort of defensive. Sorry about that. My name Chiara Lorenzi and this is my boyfriend..." Chiara trailed off so that he could speak for himself.
"Aaron Antognelli. And you are?" Aaron asked, depositing the box on the floor of Y/n's apartment, "Y/n Lee." Y/n answered. "It's nice to meet you, Y/n. I hope we get to become very good friends in the near future." Chiara said, nudging the taller girl as she and Aaron walked out to grab more boxes.
With the extra two sets of hands, Y/n and the movers were able to get everything inside quickly and it was a good thing too since the sky began to dark with thick rain clouds. "Um, thank you for your help." Y/n muttered, going into her house and beginning to close the door when a hand appeared between the door and the frame, keeping her from closing it fully, "Hold on there, kangaroo. Don't you want help unpacking?" Aaron asked.
"Oh, no. I couldn't ask for that. You have done quite a bit a-and I don't know you well enough." Y/n frantically shook her head. The couple shared a look before turning back to Y/n, "Please, we... I insist. We want to make up for the rocky way we greeted you. Of course, we won't force you to and if you don't want us to help you, we'll leave." Chiara said.
Y/n sighed and nodded, opening the door fully to let the couple in. She didn't know them or trust them, but she also needed all the help she could get. That, and she was shit at decorating, so it would be nice to enlist the help of someone else.
Chiara and Aaron looked around, "Why does your apartment look so much better than ours?" Aaron asked, "I thought they were all the same." Y/n said, looking at her spacious place. "Nah, yours has much more space, but it could be the fact that you're living alone that makes it seem that way." Aaron shrugged.
Chiara whirled around and clapped her hands together, "Alright, let's get this done."
With a yelp, Y/n fell out of her bed as the alarm she had set on her phone blared in her ear that contained the hearing aid. She had so much fun with Aaron and Chiara the previous night that she ended up going to be later than she usually liked to whenever she had something important to do the next day. After the day they helped her unpack, the two quickly became friends Y/n and they had been hanging out with each other ever since.
Y/n groaned and hobbled over to a cabinet near her bed where she kept her medicine, "Shit, getting drunk the day before my interview was not smart." Y/n grumbled, opening a bottle of pills and a bottle of water from her mini fridge.
Y/n gathered her clothing and put it on the end of the bed then went and took a scalding hot shower that helped her sober up. Y/n gave a quiet groan as she messaged her shoulders, "Man, my shoulders are stiff." She complained.
Stepping out of the shower, Y/n put on her outfit, which consisted of wool wide-leg pants, a skims t-shirt bodysuit, a nocturne cropped jacket, and a pair of heeled patchwork boots. Looking in the mirror, Y/n narrowed her eyes, "Hmm, wait." Y/n looked around to the clothes she had thrown everywhere when looking for a good outfit.
Her room was covered in an explosion of beige, brown, white, and black. There was not a lick of color in any of her wardrobe, save for her shoes, which were still not brightly colored, so they still fit her aesthetic. "I need to add some color to my wardrobe." Y/n muttered, before grabbing her things and making her way down to where the Uber was waiting for her.
She gave the driver the address of a café that Susie had suggested, Café de Paris, and off they went. Y/n's heart thudded so hard in her chest that she was pretty sure that the beat was coming from her stomach rather than her chest. Y/n ran a hand through her long, messy hair and tried to calm the nervous feeling in her stomach.
The driver looked at Y/n through the rear mirror and cleared his throat, "Nerveux? Vous avez un rendez-vous ou une raison de vous énerver?" He asked, causing Y/n to jump from the sudden addressing. "Euh, oui. J'ai un entretien très important. J'ai déjà obtenu le poste, mais je suis encore nerveux." Y/n answered shakily, wringing her hands together nervously.
The driver studied Y/n through the mirror before turning his eyes back to the road, "Eh, don't be nervous. It must be just a 'get to know you' interview." The driver said, switching to English and waving a hand to the side as if he was brushing Y/n's nervousness away.
"You're right. Merci, Monsieur." Y/n sighed, leaning back against the headrest. The rest of the car ride was spent in silence.
⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙
Susie sat at a table in Café de Paris, occasionally looking at her watch as she waited for Y/n to arrive. Admittedly, she had arrived a bit too early, but she was excited. She had been looking forward to finally starting the F1 academy and with Y/n working by her side, she'd make these girls into Formula One champions.
Susie continued looking out the window for Y/n, even though she has no idea what Y/n looked like at all. Y/n walked through the door and approached Susie from behind, "Mrs. Wolff?" Y/n spoke up, causing the blonde woman to jump up. As soon as they were face-to-face, both women froze.
Now, Y/n was open about her sexuality and what she liked, but Susie wasn't. Susie had never been interested in women and she wasn't one who would ever fall in love when she already had a husband and a beautiful son, but Susie's heart raced looking at the younger woman and she couldn't understand why. Susie had no problem admitting when another woman is beautiful and the one in front of her? Well, she was drop dead gorgeous in Susie's eyes.
"Ah, Ms. Lee. You startled me." Susie chuckled, putting a hand on her chest to calm her racing heart. Whether it was racing because of Y/n's beauty or because she genuinely got startled, she didn't know. Either way, the woman in front of her made her heart race. "My apologies, Mrs. Wolff. I didn't mean to scare you." Y/n apologized, giving the older woman a shallow bow instinctively.
"Shall we sit and begin?" Susie asked, gesturing to the chair. Y/n nodded and sat down across from the older woman. "Okay, remember that you already have the job. This is just to get to know you a bit more. Do you want to order something or do you just want to start?" Susie questioned.
"I would like to order something." Y/n muttered, Susie gestured to someone and a waiter came over, "Are you ladies ready to order?" The waiter asked politely. "Yes, I would like a chocolate chaud and panna cotta parfumeé au citron." Susie told the waiter who wrote it down before turning to Y/n, "I would like Le Chou Profiterole and the Irish coffee. Please." Y/n said.
Once the waiter finished writing down their orders and left, Susie turned back to Y/n with a smile that made Y/n want to throw herself off a cliff. She was so pretty and Y/n didn't think Susie knew just how gorgeous she was.
"Okay, let's start while we're waiting for our orders. Can you tell me about yourself?" Susie questioned, "Oh okay, um... I'm Y/n Lee, I am half Chinese and Half Australian, I am 23 years old, I want to do modeling in my spare time, I like surfing and skiing, and I used to be a Formula Two driver before I contracted meningitis and had to stop." Y/n replied.
"You contracted meningitis?" Susie asked, "I did. I lost hearing in my right ear," Y/n turned her head and moved her hair, showing her cochlear, "I had to get a cochlear for my right ear and I have a hearing aid in my left because I'm losing my hearing in that ear. After I got my surgery, I just decided not to continue driving even though I would love to continue." Y/n shrugged.
Susie nodded, "If you had the chance, would you try and continue to drive in F2?" Susie questioned. Y/n sighed and looked around the café, "I honestly never thought about it. I wanted to but I didn't have enough money to continue, so I thought that my chances were over. If I had the chance to do it again, I don't know if I would take it. I'm turning 23 soon and I fell like I'm getting too old." Y/n said, looking up as the waiter arrived with their stuff.
"Thank you/Merci." Susie and Y/n said simultaneously. Y/n brought the glass mug up to her lips and took a sip of the drink. Y/n put the mug down and looked at Susie again, "What are your goals for the next five years?" Susie asked.
"Hmm, I think I still see myself working in the motorsports world or perhaps attempting to further my modeling career. Or both." Y/n answered, picking up one of the cream puff and taking a bite, refraining from making any sort of noise.
"Do you consider yourself a passionate person when it comes to this sport?" Susie inquired, Y/n nodded as she swallowed the pastry in her mouth, "I was..am...Before I got meningitis, I was obsessed with being a Formula One driver. I was about as passionate about it like most of the guys on the grid. It was my passion." Y/n explained.
Susie nodded and sat back in her chair, "That'll be all." She said, picking up her spoon and eating some of her panna cotta parfumeé au citron. Y/n paused halfway from the plate where she was reaching for another mini creampuff, "That's all?" She asked, "That's all." Susie reiterated
"Okay." Y/n nodded. She was honestly so unsure as to why she needed to do the interview when she was only going to be asked about four questions, "Now, let's get to know each other since we're going to be working closely together. My name is Suzanne Wolff, but you can call me Susie. I am Scottish, 39 years old, I have a wonderful husband who is the team principal of Mercedes-AMG PETRONAS Formula One team, and I have a gorgeous fiver-year-old son named Jack." Susie introduced herself.
The woman held out a hand for Y/n to shake, "It's wonderful to meet you, Mrs. Wolff. I look forward to working with you." Y/n said, grabbing the older woman's hand and shaking it firmly. Susie waved off her formalities, "Oh, please. Call me Susie. We'll be working close together, so we might as well drop the formalities." She chuckled.
The two women continued to talk about random topics, getting to know each other more and more. The two became quick friends and even made plans to hang outside of work sometime in the future and even talked about Y/n meeting her son and husband since she would have to meet them eventually.
By the time Y/n was in her Uber and on her way home, it was well into the afternoon and Y/n had a small permanent smile on her face as she thought about the older woman.
Y/n hated to admit it, but she tended to catch feelings for people quite easily. She didn't and never would believe in love at first sight, but she did believe that one can get to know someone well enough to gain some sort of feelings for someone.
And Y/n could tell that the bubbling feeling in her stomach was her feeling giddy and anxious. She was beginning to feel something for the older married woman, but she brushed it off. It was just a small puppy crush, and even if it wasn't, nothing would ever come of it. Susie was a heterosexual married woman with a family and if there was one thing Y/n could never be, it was a homewrecker.
Susie entered her home happily. Her husband and son greeting her at the entrance, "Hello, liebling. How was the interview? I can assume it went well since you're smiling from ear to ear." Toto said, kissing his wife on the forehead. "She's perfect, Toto. She is everything I wanted and more in a personal assistant. Not to mention she's absolutely gorgeous. If she were to go to a GP, people would assume she is some sort of supermodel WAG." Susie said absentmindedly.
Toto gave his wife an odd look as she bent down to greet their five-year-old. His wife was what some people would call a girl's girl and she definitely has complimented other women before, but the way she had talked about the woman she had met with made him feel curious. She had never sounded so infatuated with anyone other than him and Jack.
Of course, Toto knew that his wife was not going to cheat on him and especially not with another woman, but there was just a feeling in his gut that said there was something more than just a regular excitement to be getting the F1 Academy project off the ground.
"Yeah? Is that right?" Toto asked, "Yes. She used to be a F2 driver too, so she is the most perfect candidate for the job. I think you and Jackie would lover her." Susie said, kissing the top of Jack's head and carrying him into the kitchen.
Toto shook his head as he chuckled. He didn't know what the woman was like, but she must have been super amazing because she left such an impression on his wife that she was positively gushing about the new PA.
By the time Susie stopped talking about the new PA, Toto himself couldn't wait to meet her and he was now sharing the excitement that she was practically projecting off her in waves.
This was the start of something new and both Wolff's could tell.
↳ ❝ [Taglist] ¡!❞
@exotic-iris13 @alliwantisadonut @evie-119 @xoscar03 @cheyxfu @laur2608 @sunnylikesfrogs @goldenmoonbeam @victorharrington @only-nope
Unable to tag all of you
This one was over 6k words. I felt like I needed to give you guys this since I had been away for so long.
DO NOT ask me to update this story. I'll update when I can.
Anyway, only accepting 9 more people to be tagged
#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 x you#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#formula one fanfiction#formula one fanfic#formula 1 fics#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 x reader#formula one imagine#formula one imagines#formula one fic#formula one x reader#formula one x you#formula one x y/n#f1 one shot#f1 smut#f1 fluff#f1 x female reader#toto wolff fanfic#toto wolff x reader#toto wolff imagine#toto wolff smut#susie wolff x reader#toto x reader x susie#x female reader#f1 x y/n#f1 x poc!reader#driven by destiny series
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can i just word vomit for a min...
there was a point in late 2023 where i felt like i overstayed my welcome on simblr and i planned on just wrapping frozen pines up as quickly as possible and moving on. continuing to write when it's clear that the audience for it is dwindling felt so embarrassing that i almost didn't even want to put effort into it anymore, because i was afraid it just looked pathetic (obligatory disclaimer: no one made me feel this way, you're all so lovely, it's just the nature of seeing a community change over 7 years). writing already feels very personal to me and it's becoming increasingly harder for me to put my work out there (again, for reasons unrelated to simblr and entirely related to mental illness 🤙🏻). i know my story is so long that it deters new readers, and so sporadic that it makes old readers drop off with time. this has really been bothering me lately because i don't know what i can do to fix it. i don't think there IS anything i can do.
but. okay. don't make fun of me for saying this. dan and phil returning to youtube kinda changed my mindset? they may be pulling a fraction of the views they got in their peak, but they're happier than they've ever been and they're working on things they actually want to do, not things they think will be particularly popular. seeing that has made me realize that it is possible to keep finding joy in a community that has largely moved on without you. obviously my little blog is nowhere near the same scale, so this feels kind of silly, but i've been thinking about all the things i used to do on simblr that were never fun for me, i mainly did them because i knew they would get notes or because i felt like i had to do it. making cc, lookbooks, sim requests, reshade help (oh my god the reshade help), lot downloads, etc. they DID get notes, but i can't imagine spending my time doing any of that stuff ever again tbh.
on top of that, it makes me sad to scroll through my dash and realize that i don't recognize most of the people i see anymore. i still talk to some wonderful people here who i consider friends and that's invaluable to me (💖), but the broader community aspect is something i no longer feel a part of. and believe me, i know i'm at fault here because it's not like i'm going out of my way to talk to new people or participate in trends like i used to. i don't blame anyone except the passage of time!!
frozen pines, and simblr by extension, played such a gigantic part in my life when i needed it the most. and that's not to say that i don't still care about it, because i absolutely do, but it's a different kind of feeling. i've always promised that i would give frozen pines a satisfying conclusion rather than silently abandoning it someday, and though i do intend to keep that promise, i know it's possible that i might never get there. but i don't want to let my own insecurities get in the way of something i really enjoy doing. writing is an intrinsic piece of me that i'll never quit doing, but sharing my writing on tumblr is something that can't (and shouldn't) last forever. i know that. but i'm going to enjoy it to the fullest while we're all still here together 💞
to anyone who's still reading my silly story after all these years (especially those of you who still check in on my blog even though you're not on simblr anymore): thank you thank you thank you THANK YOUUU. you don't have to change a single thing about what you're doing. this is not me fishing for compliments or putting down an ultimatum, this is just me trying to make sense of my feelings.
but with all this being said, i've decided to quit simblr and start my own exclusive streaming service for $60 a year, i hope you'll all support me as i increase my production value 😌
(just kidding. ily. okay that's all)
#to be 100% clear this is not a goodbye - i'm literally halfway done with the next story post#just sort of an update on the state of my brain#👍🏻#btw...... sorry to Watcher fans lmaoo you guys really got the short end of the parasocial relationship stick..... </3#that's not relevant to anything i've said here i've just spent way too much time thinking about how youtube has changed in the past 20 year#because i'm a loser that got really into youtube when i was 11 and never looked back#and then the watcher thing happened. and i was like ohhh if dan and phil did that to me i would have to die about it.
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My husband finally put into words for me something that has been the main problem with this whole Anti Gwynriel because of Gwyn's past narrative.
According to Anti's, it's not ok to ship Gwyn with Az because she's not healed enough and hasn't shown that she's ready for a relationship.
According to Anti's, fanart of Gwynriel in provocative positions are not appropriate because it's disrespectful to Gwyn due to her SA, that she needs to first give verbal consent before we're allowed to imagine what a HEA for Gwynriel might look like.
And at first, it almost feels like a gotcha for them because you question whether you're disrespecting real survivors by saying, "she doesn't need to give consent for us to ship them since it's a book." This statement is true, I don't think readers should be forced to abide by real world morals when it comes to possible paths a characters arc might take, however it makes you pause for a moment to question whether what you're saying is disrespectful to those who have been victims.
But he actually flipped that entire thing on it's head when he said, "if the issue is about consent, then why is only being applied to a SA victim? Shouldn't consent be applied to everyone?"
It was kind of a lightbulb moment for me because those Anti's never vocalize how it's wrong for people to ship Eris & Az, Mor & Emerie, Vassa & Lucien (SA victim), Lucien, Jurian & Vassa, the LoA & Helion (because at this point they are not a consenting pair), Nesta & Eris. There are a bunch of non canon, non consent ships in this series and nobody has an issue with those. Nobody takes up the crusade arguing that it's wrong for people in the fandom to imagine those pairings together or drawing fanart of them in NSFW positions. Most of the time they're celebrated but has Emerie consented to having a sexual relationship with Mor? All she did was call her beautiful and Feyre had done the same in ACOMAF. Why do they never call out fanart of that pairing? Or Neris after Nesta harshly rejected him? Where Eris is currently suffering torture at the hands of Beron and we've got no clue as to his sexual preference. Also, Elain only consented to a fully clothed kiss in the bonus (remember, she grew up with human morals which she still holds fast too, she didn't jump right into bed with Graysen), we have no evidence she wanted more yet there's plenty of NSFW E/riel artwork out there and I'm betting some existed before SF, before she even consented to a kiss.
The only time I've ever heard anyone argue for consent or argue against NSFW art is in relation to Az and Gwyn and the message they're sending is that only female characters who have been SA need to give consent before fans should be shipping them.
That's when the shipping agenda makes itself known because if no other non-canon / non-consenting pairing disturbs them to the point they need to create post after post surrounding how wrong people are for shipping them, then it's clear to see that it's only Gwyn being shipped with Az that they take issue with and when only E/riels make these arguments, it seems highly suspect.
Gwyn's SA is irrelevant in terms of consent because EVERYONE should have consent before engaging in physical acts with others no matter their past. However, Gwyn's SA should not be the weight dragging her character down, the scarlet letter on her chest that means the fandom isn't allowed to give her the same treatment that all other characters receive. Where we're free to imagine and create fanart / fanfiction / headcanons (even the NSFW variety) for any pairing that we desire, regardless of their past or preference, even those who have never expressed romantic interest towards one another, except for Gwyn.
Consent in the actual book will be important but consent having already been given in our imaginations so we can imagine possibilities beyond what is currently written is the right of any reader.
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"They should've made an emphasis on Sallie May being trans before" "There should be things that openly indicate she's trans aside from the horns" "The merch shouldn't show her with a bulge if she's trans, logically she should hide it"
My brother in Christ shut the fuck up
Aight, I get where most of you are coming from but let me just say that Sallie May is a big breath of fresh air from a lot of canon trans rep I've been seeing in the internet about big projects such as Helluva Boss, let's go point from point
This contains spoilers from Hell's Belles
Sallie May is a transgender Imp, this is not something that was decided just now for the short as her first appearance in the moon harvest festival already shows her with the thick line horns (Which are exclusively from AMAB (Assigned Male at Birth) Imps
If there's only one point these people made that I agree with is the fact that the horns thing should be something implied in the show, not specifically with the intention of outing a trans character but something simple that could give more context for those who do not check the wikis or the social medias that often
Other than that, I feel like they haven't actually meet a trans person irl because they believe that her being trans should be something that everyone should catch the first time they see her, that someone should inmeditaly point out she's trans, yet, they get upset at the fact that she's proudly showing a bulge on the merchandise
They want the show to scream verbally about her being trans but not casually
You have no idea how relieved I felt when, at no point in the episode, her being trans was mentioned or outed, none pointed out her horns or voice and instead the problem was her feeling left out of her sister's life, and, again, not because she's trans and feels like Millie doesn't view her the same or some bullshit, but because Millie doesn't go home as often and felt a bit mad when she had to do her work
In fact! Her not getting genitalia reconstructive surgery is also a thing that is cool about her, she got tits but didn't chop off the dick and is not insecure about it, most of times trans people are put between not getting surgery or getting ALL of the surgeries AND being extremely insecure about their genitalia, and yes, there's a lot of trans people that feel that way, but I think that aspect of her is really good representation for those that don't want to get surgery or only want to either reduce or enlarge their chest, not everyone gets dysphoria the same way and this doesn't make her less of a woman for that
Even if it's okay to have characters where one of the main issue of the comes from being trans (I have a few myself), It's also nice to see character that are trans but the main issue with their life comes from something completely different and not related
So for people upset about her passing so well you can't immediately tell she's trans
Surprise! That's a lot of us want, that's what a lot trans people irl try, to just be a person of the gender we really are, to be normal and not needing to always out of ourselves, to be treated the same no matter what
I make a lot of jokes about my lack of dick and my excess of tits, I only out myself as trans when formally presenting to someone and that is just because I'm not allowed to be trans so I don't pass as a boy at all and need to specify, but me being trans is something that most of my friend only bring into the conversation to make a friendly joke or when I bring it up
Sallie May is not only good representation, is one of the best I've seen in a while in the modern adult media, because she's subtle yet obvious
You may not like Viv (Me too girl /non gendered), but I got to give it to her, the lgbt+ representation she does is on point
Anyways now that I tackled down that issue is time to actually talks about this short as a whole see ya
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HI ! I saw your Sexy notes part 3 and i have an embarassing ask to ask . I have lilith in cancer but my breast are ugly couse they are small and my nipples are inverted ( yes, such thing exists ) I am super embarrased by them. I feel deformed and ugly and I am terriflyed to be seen naked even by a doctor let alone a lover . woman on porn AND on movies have pointy nipples - and that makes me feel even more as an ugly freak . So i want to ask is it becouse my lilith is in the 10 house? i dont know what this house deals with but is it couse of that that they are ugly? or is it becouse my chiron is in the 1 and that makes me have an ugly body ?(even tho i have read chiron in the 1 is about insecuritis related to the face or the whole body counts ?) i do have venus in the 8 but thats useless ! i just wonder couse one astrologer told me - with such placement (chiron 1) your lesson is to be kind to others and give them confidents and thats how you will heal... but i am confused ok i am kind to people , give compliments to others ,everyone tells me how amazing and kind i am , i am uplifting others BUT i still see myself as physically ugly- how the fuck me been kind to others is gonna make me feel sexy and pretty ?? like makes 0 sense ...sorry i dont wanna sound rude !!! - i just dont know what i am doing wrong? thank you for your notes tho , gives interesting information and its also you have a great unbias opinions and also you do all kinds of topics and that so fun and refreshing ! sorry for the terrible ask i will understand if you dont respond couse shit that is one weird ass ask (sorry again)
Hi! Ive seen a lot of Cancer Liliths be insecure about their breasts so I think its that placement making you extra insecure about that part. And then the Chiron 1st house makes you extra insecure. Chiron 1st house doesnt give an ugly body but it can make you insecure about your body. Venus 8th house is also one of the placement that makes you less likely to see your own beauty. Its actually scary how some placements can make someone see themselves different than how they really look. Ive seen so many people with the placements you just listed who felt insecure about themselves about certain features while others saw them as beautiful.
Lilith seems to have the same effect on the body part that rules the house it sits in. I have Lilith in the 8th house and I always felt insecure about my genitals even tho none of my partners commented something bad about them. My sister have Lilith in the 4th house and she had a boob job, my best friend had Lilith in the 9th house and she hated her legs.
And almost 90% of the women in the adult industry had their breasts and genitals done so dont ever compare yourself to them. But I know its hard not to😭💜
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So I need to know what animal they think is the batfamilies special interest.
Like we all know they are on the spectrum like look at Bruce. He's a 30 year old man that dresses as a bat and don't get me wrong there are several reasons he dresses as one but it always has something to do with the animal itself and I always think that's funny how it's even used as a joke in several comics, and animated movies/ shows.
So Bruce knows everything about bat's, shape color, species, what food they eat and how they live and even the different culture views on bat's. He could talk all day about it if asked and he always does it with the utmost care. Like he was giving a speech at a gala or speaking to the league.
I think we all know Dicks is obviously Robin's. Cause why else would he choose to be a brightly colored vigilante that's after a bird from the north? I feel like after moving in with Bruce he took a quiz on what bird he would be cause he was studying birds in school and got a Robin and took that to heart as a passion and not only learned everything about a Robin's but that had just become his identity for awhile and he loved it. Bruce when he heard it at first had thought it wouldn't work but after making him his own costume and even watching several videos on the birds he thought it fit his son nicely.
Jason didn't break away from the Robin role and embraces it actually. But he was always way more shy when it came to discussing his favorite. I think he would have a fascination with bugs and snakes and would absolutely be the kid with a spider or a beardy. He once convinced Bruce to get him a baby beardy and then it became an obsession. He had a sweatshirt that even had a cartoonish looking beardy printed on it and he proudly talks about it to any one who asked. Bruce would silently close his eyes and soak in all the information about them he could.
I totally think Tim loves frogs and even sea creatures. He has a tank with shrimp in it and his boyfriend makes fun of him and calls him a shrimp farmer but he also has a tank that has glass frogs in it. It's a huge tank that takes up over half his room and he loves just watching them sleep and even makes cute little tiktoks with them. He always is getting cute things for the habitat and going shopping. He also takes Damian on these trips. Because they both enjoy walking around and even stopping to pet or talk to the people who bring in their dogs. Bruce also enjoys walking into Tim's room and seeing the frogs and shrimp and even says hello to them before leaving again.
Damian is no stranger to having a soft spot for animals but I know he loves cats and dogs. He is definitely a cat person. Alfred the cat is his prized possession and he will proudly take pictures and then draw them. He loves using his animals as drawing references and has multiple books filled to the brim of just them. Sometimes if they are really good he goes to Bruce and asks them to be laminated so he can hang them up in his room because they deserve to be celebrated and respected. He also tells Bruce odd facts about his animals. How Alfred (the cat) specifically likes to sleep on his left side and enjoys being scratched behind his ears the most.
Bruce loves his weird sons because he is weird and for Christmas he always gets them something related to their animals because it's like a bonding experience for them. Some days they don't even talk about anything but their animals but I can imagine them all settling on a couch and out of pure bordem putting on documentaries and spending time just listening and learning. Of course this could also lead into some heated debates about who's animals is the best.
Jason: no you don't understand
Damian: *scoffs* actually Todd you never understood anything
Dick: ok well I set the whole thing for Robin soooo
Tim: oh please you were eight!!
Bruce: I think we are forgetting how bats-
Kids: *groan because they have been hearing about bat's for over half their lives and are tired*
Alfred just walks in and smiles as he sets a pitcher down.
Alfred: actually you are forgetting how important bee's are to the environment. Which is why I plant only the best pollinator friendly flowers
Cue to everyone rioting cause after all this time Alfred has never talked about the fact he is in fact a bee guy. Ever since he started working for the Wayne's they let him have full control of the gardens and he always loved that in the bleak of Gotham he had his own personal eden with the flowers. Bruce's parents also appreciated him for this and would let Alfred do as he pleased when he would passionately talk to them about the bees. Even when they passed away Bruce had always assumed Alfred just did it because he didn't trust anyone else.
Which was part way true but he loves watching them bumble around and bump into each other as he works.
If anyone knows what Duke, steph, and Cass would like please comment or feel free to debate!! Just please remember to be nice and save the bees 🐝
#batman#they are so silly#batfam#dc comics#damain wayne#jason todd#tim x conner#tim drake#bruce wayne#alfred pennyworth#dick grayson#i live for this#i love them#headcanon#animals#debatable#go ahead and try man#your honor they are autism and adhd coded#special interest#no objecting in the court of krypton#teach me how to dougie#once again the chat is tweakin#dc incorrect quotes#dc universe#incorrect dc quotes#dcu#justice league#dinosaurs#i love dinos at least#this is what i get for being a hippie
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me: posts a snippet of the fic i started
me: doesn't do anything else for like a month
anyway, hey, here's another snippet because me giving in to the urge to write fics for aftg (and probably also tsc once i read it) has made me borderline feral with the need to write, write, and keep writing
Neil doesn’t mention his mother very often, not even to Andrew. Even thinking about her leaves him feeling conflicted, and while he can logically tell himself that Andrew’s distaste towards Mary is based on violent truth, whenever someone else points it out it becomes difficult to swallow down his urge to get defensive. If he’s being honest with himself, he can’t decide how he feels about her anymore. There’s a concoction of emotions that always swirl together in his head in a way, leaving him dizzy and disoriented.
He knows that Bee is aware of Mary because he knows that Andrew and Aaron have talked about Mary during their joint sessions. He knows this because Andrew had asked if he could bring her up, making it very clear that he wouldn’t give any details that Neil wasn’t okay with, but also making it clear that Aaron would likely lose some of his continuous animosity towards Neil if he knew something that he could relate to. “And what better for you to bond over,” Andrew had drawled with falsified disinterest, “than abusive mothers who died in cars.” Neil hadn’t flinched back at those words, but Andrew was looking at him intently like he was expecting it anyway. When Neil gave him blanket permission, he cocked a bro but didn’t bring it up again.
A few weeks later Aaron approached Neil between classes, looking disgruntled and reluctant and kind of annoyed, but he huffed a sigh and crossed his arms over his chest defensively and leveled Neil with a look that wasn’t completely scathing. “Your mom,” he said, then stopped, grimacing to himself as Neil looked at him curiously, making himself stay quiet and patient, something he often isn’t. Eventually Aaron managed to string his words together, though it was obvious that he was gritting his teeth as he spoke. “She wasn’t good to you,” he said. “But you loved her, right? And maybe you still do, but you feel like you shouldn’t?”
Neil had faltered at those words. “She kept me alive,” he said slowly.
“But maybe that wasn’t good enough,” Aaron replied.
The topic wasn’t funny, but Neil huffed out a laugh anyway. “Maybe,” he agreed.
Aaron had looked at him a moment longer, brows pinched together. Then, without another word, Aaron spun around on his heel and walked away. Neither of them have broached the topic again, and Neil has no plans to do so anytime soon, but Aaron has been a little bit less hostile towards him ever since.
fic is currently at 14k words (but this snippet is from the first 3k). i will probably post more snippets as i write it and eventually, at some point, actually finish it and then post the fucking thing o7
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my gf is rly into dirty talk (me to her) but I have such a hard time with it, I get embarrassed and my mind goes blank I can't think of what to say! Any tips?
oh my god this is actually so relatable because i used to get SO embarrassed and nervous that it would come out weird or wrong if i said something
honestly the only advice i can really give is practice makes perfect? maybe start by asking your gf things you could say that she finds hot/that turn her on and get comfortable with those until you can switch them up a little bit and come up with things on your own. i promise it gets so much easier when you try and work through the embarrassment.
examples:
COMPLIMENTS COMPLIMENTS COMPLIMENTS are so key
"you look so cute/hot doing _____" or "you're so wet for me" can be added onto or changed to be "you're such a good girl/slut taking my fingers/the strap so well" etc etc
if you're bottoming i find that as someone who usually tops small things like "please *title/name* it feels so good" or "fuck you feel so good inside of me" are huge turn ons
#wlw ns/fw#lesbian ns/fw#lesbian nsft#sapphic nsft#wlw nsft#wlw#wlw smut#lesbian#lesbian daddy#advice?
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Weekly Update - Apr 27, 2024
Hello, Nigel Profite voters! Profitists? I’m here after a pretty big week of writing. Unfortunately, this week has been a crazy combination of good and bad news for me, luckily allowing me to concentrate a lot on High School Revenge.
Let’s start off with the important bit. I’ve written 12k words this week. Yes, you’ve heard that right. I’ve completely finished the homecoming party event, which was huge, bizarre, and full of choices. Though my writing pace has been amazing, it only happened because some bad stuff happened irl. I just lost my job, so I had a lot of time between applying for jobs and staring at the ceiling to work on this. What I’m trying to say is that you shouldn’t expect this speed under normal circumstances, since I think the 4k a week from before was more realistic. So, please don’t pray for my continued unemployment just so I could finish the book faster haha.
An interesting thing I’ve worked on this week is setting up special separate screens in the Stats menu for all of the targets, where I give a brief physical description and remind you of their role in the Tragedy. I think this will help if you ever wonder what someone like Vivian or Connor did back then. Since I’ve also made Burt spy on them all, you’ll also gain access to some special info, where you see some of their presumed traits, likes, dislikes, and related skills (i.e music or baseball). I will also add here in the future the clues you get that will help in your upcoming revenge.
As I’ve already said, I’ve also finished the homecoming party event that happens in the first week of school. It’s around 20k words, which is just slightly longer than the whole 2nd chapter. I think I’ve made it a fun experience with all of our weird targets and I hope you will have fun with it once it’s released!
In terms of what I’ve got left for the chapter, I’ve only got to write random events now, some initial relationship and hobby events, and the actual homecoming event. If things go well, in around 1 month everything should be done. Unless I start writing really long separate paths for each RO for homecoming. If I do that, it might take like 1 month and a half or something.
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Hello! If you don't mind, this is half a vent and half an ask both to you and to your followers who have had some experience?
I feel like I want certain aspects of a romantic relationship, the idea of having someone "special" is very appealing. Especially since I find myself falling in the trap of romance tropes, and I really do feel that I want to find that one person who I'd feel safe being physically close with, and not just because I turn my brain off to suffer through it but to actually enjoy it.
I know that I'm rather attracted to men, in theory at least, but whenever there's even remotely a thought in my brain that a polite conversation may turn into something more I get nervous, kinda in a bad way. I feel like I want to put a barrier in and I'm afraid they'll be reading into my behaviour too much. It makes me feel as if I like to play pretend in my head but I'm too much of a coward when real life gets involved.
I've been identifying as ace for years now, and I just turned 24. No experience in the dating department, I've been slowly making my way to accepting being at least arospec as well, possibly just aro, but for some reason it's been so much harder for me. Asexuality just clicked. This I think I may be fighting because the idea of a relationship seems too nice to give up and I've already had a bad experience with an extremely undernegotiated QPR (ended quickly but left a bitter taste nevertheless).
I just wish I could not think about it? But I also feel like the societal expectations of romantic attraction are much more pressing than sexual one. I don't want to lead anyone on, and I don't want to feel this little bit of dread whenever I have a conversation with a guy who I know doesn't have a girlfriend. That's another sign of being aro, right? Being able to be comfortable only when the possibility of the other party wanting you romantically is non-existent.
Sorry for this being so long. Thank you for listening, either way.
Romance definitely has a hard to explain quality to it, and I think that can make it questioning if you're aro especially tricky. It is possible that anxiety you're feeling when a situation could turn romantic is a form of repulsion. It's not uncommon for romance repulsion to feel more like anxiety or nervousness, and for people feel like wanting to go and hide. Alloromantic people can be nervous too sometimes, but it usually comes with a feeling of anticipation and still being drawn to the other person. Or they will usually have either trouble with anxiety in other areas, or issues with romance (romance related trauma for example). Sometimes it can be tricky to know exactly what it is, but if the stuff below doesn't sound like you at all, than repulsion is a likely explanation.
The other thing I would point is that fully alloromantic people often have people in real life they are experience a romantic pull towards, who they really want to be in a romantic relationship with. And if you're not experiencing that, that could also be a strong sign of being aromantic.
Being aromantic, and even romance repulsed, if you are, does not mean you can't have a very important person in your life. I know you mentioned a QPR that didn't go well, and it's up to you if that's something you ever want to try again, but even if you don't. remember that deep bonds can come in all forms of relationships. All types of relationships, including friendships, familial relationships, etc. have the potential to be very special of very deep if you end up connecting to someone in the right way. So whatever path you choose to take, don't feel like this isn't possible.
I'll throw this out followers too if anyone wants to share their own thoughts or advice.
All the best, Anon! Good luck!
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"Discomfort in a Married State" What does this mean?
In Discord, I jokingly said I'd do the Webster's Dictionary trope to start a post.
youtube
But... was I joking?
Webster's Dictionary defines marriage as "an intimate or close union," or closely, marry as "to unite in close and usually permanent relation." Taking about marriage is not just about a literal spousal union, and it is not just about romance. You have aspects and ideas in your life that you are married to even though you don't put the word to it. "Marriage of flavors", "married to your job", "marry academic disciplines,"... I had a teacher who said "I'm not married to this idea" when writing something in scratch work as a possibility.
The title "Discomfort in a Married State" is pulled from a quote from the real Stede Bonnet at his trial, and it's repurposed in the show, used at the start of Fictional Stede's pirate journey rather than the end. To me, I do not feel like the adjective is used in the episode as actually being about a spousal union. Stede is not a good fit with Mary, no, and the episode opens with both Stede and Mary both being pushed into the marriage by their parents because of societal expectations and goes on to show that their marriage doesn't work. However, Mary's not alone in Stede's horror dream, and it doesn't just feature his failures in their marriage: the "married state" title drop slides directly to his father mocking Stede's aversion to violence (and weakness, in his, the father's, eyes) and Smoke Blackbeard and Alma serving as a callback to his naive pirate dreams becoming more starkly real when he was stabbed. Mary wasn't what Stede left; unfortunate as it is, as a man, he had other less extreme options to make an unhappy marriage more comfortable for him. The "marriage" Stede has is the life that his father and role at birth pushed him into, and initially, Stede planned to take Mary with him in leaving it. Stede pushed out into what he viewed as a more idealized lifestyle, even though he's finding out its not the final destination in his journey.
On Ed's side, his parallel is not his relationship with Izzy. In his first big conversation with Stede (the one in the library), he says plainly what his "discomfort" is:
Ed: You ever feel trapped, like you're just treading water, waiting to drown?
Stede: Yes, I very much have felt that way.
Ed: Blackbeard always wins, that's the thing. He can't fail. It's not even a challenge anymore. People just see the flag, and they freak out, Blackbeard!, and they basically just give up, they surrender. What's the point? I don't even need to be on the boat. I'm a ghost. There's no chaos, there's no drama, there's no fucking life!
Stede: Look, I can't believe I'm saying this, but have you ever considered retirement?
Ed's "marriage" is with the Blackbeard persona and the pirate life. He's not happy, and he is also looking for a way out. He's idly mentioning death as an alternative (e.g., the "I haven't died yet, have I?" outburst with Izzy, and "I'm thinking about packing it all in". It can be a bit of a grind"" to Stede before Stede introduces Ed to retirement). He then pivots to the brief identity theft escape, then the China plan with Stede. There is a parallel of the marriage -> finding escape pipeline. Ed and Stede were both intrinsically bound to lives they do not want, and they had to take dramatic steps to leave them.
Izzy narratively differs from Mary in that Mary isn't an antagonist (bless you, DJenks). This is a storytelling medium without monologuing voice overs or Shakespearean soliloquies, and something needs to be in story to represent that conflict. Izzy is the representation of the external antagonistic force that adds fuel to Ed's internal conflict, analogous to the function that the Badmintons (instead of Mary) have for Stede. This is what we mean when we say Izzy is a plot device for Ed's (and to a lesser extent, Stede's) story: most of his scenes (all in S1?) revolve around keeping Ed in a life he doesn't want while also functionally servicing as a conventional reaction to Stede's brand of captaincy (characters like Lucius or Frenchie have their own independent quirks, so that's why they don't get this same comparison). Izzy is in story as the obstacle that keeps pulling Ed into that life, into that marriage with that persona. The story is not literally saying Ed is married to Izzy or that they were former lovers, but as the representation in story, Izzy is going to act like a jilted spouse. (And Ed's not into him and views him as a father figure, so... not a literal spousal marriage.)
In the end, the "married state" is not literally about Mary or Izzy. Stede would still be unhappy with a different wife or as a bachelor in the same stagnating lifestyle. Ed would still be unhappy with a different first mate but still living as Blackbeard. Ed reacting strongly in 2x7 when he thought there would be a conflict of a possible deal breaking choice of staying with Stede and leaving piracy show that it isn't just about the right person but making sure that the two perfect people who found each other are both in a position to live a life that makes them both happy outside of their relationship. This is also a romcom very pointedly leading toward a climatic wedding of Ed and Stede, and the message is not that Stede and Ed don't like being married at all: they need to work together to reach a "married state" that satisfies all facets of their lives. They're so close!
We're joined to one another. Intertwined. We wrote our names on each other in permanent ink.
They're working together on their relationship ("the inn" at the end of 2x8 isn't literally about the inn), and they're finding the path to go on that takes them both to a place to where they want to be.
Also, "Comfort in a Married State", calling it as an episode title after WBD collapses and OFMD gets a pick up 🥰
#our flag means death#ofmd#stede bonnet#ed teach#mary bonnet#izzy hands#discomfort in a married state#i can't wait for wbd to collapse#don't stream on max#Youtube
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