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riridontneedya · 3 years

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IMPERIUM✨

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x Any house Reader, Harry Potter x

Wordcount: 4,210

Warnings: SMUT, ANGST dom ,sub, daddy ,oral, teasing ,praise, spitting , chocking etc run of the mill smut.

A/N : Well the time has come I've finally given in.. I say finally didn't take much conviction lol. Anyway in this universe Dumbledore is still very much alive and no-one tried to kill one another so all is well. As always enjoy and let me know what you think xx

Summary: Draco and y/n battle it out for the new position as headmaster but what happens when they are made to work alongside one another

“Ladies and gentlemen, if I may have your attention please” spoke Dumbledore. He arose from his chair gently tapping his knife against his chalice in order to garner the crowds attention . Shortly everyones eyes were fixated on him. He cleared his throat and began. “I would like to thank each and everyone one of you for coming out tonight … as we all know its been a tough decision for me to step down, however! .I have no fear as I know the school will be in the safest of hands. I hand picked these two myself and in-fact trust them with my life. I know they have been working tirelessly day in and out to ensure not only my trust .. but all members of committee and most importantly our students. So with that being said when it is revealed in tomorrows assembly who the new headmaster and deputy are I want you both to know ,no matter the outcome I am so proud of you both, so let us raise a toast to our candidates . Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N and Draco Lucius Malfoy”. With that Dumbledore rose his chalice high in the air smiling warmly at the pair. Everybody followed suit and raised their glasses high in celebration.

Draco and Y/N graciously thanked everyone as they showered them with words of praise and encouragement . Just then Y/n went to speak however her words were abruptly cut short by Astoria. As if an eager child unable to contain her excitement she blurted out. “ Draco and I are so grateful for all the support, so as a thank you after this we will be having refreshments and canapés at the Malfoy manor to celebrate his new position as headmaster .. all are welcome to join”. ‘Headmaster .. oh my how incredibly presumptuous” Y/N chuckled into her drink. “Excuse me” squeaked Astoria, she spun around rapidly locking eyes with Y/n. Y/n folded her arms across her chest and began “I do believe you heard me Astoria .. you said headmaster and thats yet to be revealed so for you to address Draco as said headmaster is well.. presumptuous”. Astorias tongue prodded the inside of her cheek, you could tell by the hue of red in her face she was infuriated but trying to find the words without imploding.

“Well , I just know he will ok so yeah just know that”, spat Astoria in a feeble attempt to shake off Y/ns rightful observation’. ‘Oh I see” snapped y/n “why didn't you say it was you sooner, Sybil , Sybil Trelawney teacher of divination . What are you doing here under the guise of Polyjuice potion? I mean you could’ve just come with your crystal ball and tea leaves and said he was the winner that way instead of this elaborate scheme don’t you think?” The laughter of fellow by standers suddenly erupted around the women. Astoria who now sup parsed hues of red was the shade of a beetroot , completely enraged prepared to snap she was interrupted by Dumbledore. “ NOW now girls quell your fiery natures, this is to be a peaceful night of celebrations”. The woman smiled coyly at Dumbledore. ‘My apologies Dumbledore” y/n chimed up. “We speak no more of it ok” Dumbledore smiled and gently patted the crown of y/ns head and proceeded to make his way back to his chair. Y/N turned and smiled gloatingly at Astoria. In response Astoria screwed her face up mockingly and fled no doubt to chastise Draco for not swooping in and defending her.

“Pwoarh Nice one mate” chuckled Fred as he held out his fist waiting for Y/n to bump it. Hahah stop it you she giggled. ‘Here , should we go to the manor after this for a laugh” sniggered George appearing alongside them. “Ha, I'm sure she’s revoked my invitation effective immediately” said Y/n, as she peered over to Astoria , she could see her flailing her arms around whilst Draco made no attempt to conceal his look of boredom in the conversation. “You know what lets .. Ive been dying to get a peek of the manor anyway what harm can it do”. ‘Cracking’ the twins harmonised in unison. The trio linked arms and jollied along.

Once arrived at the manor they soon found it to be every bit luxurious as they envisioned. The floors were marble and reflected the light of the enormous crystal chandeliers suspended from the ceiling. Each stair of the grand staircase was illuminated by candle light creating an auburn strip propelling up the length of the stairs. Every inch of the manor oozed with decadence. “Wow , its rather impressive” mused y/n . “You can say that again” chimed Fred as he helped himself to a glass of champagne , handing one over to y/n. They began to mingle and drink with the rest of the party guests it was an overall pleasant evening that was until Astoria appeared before Y/n. “Glad to see you could make it y/n” said Astoria with a constipated smile. She had made little to no effort to conceal her sarcastic tone.

Y/n had no interest in rehashing todays mini confrontation. Instead she pulled a sickly sweet smile and said “ Wouldn’t miss it for the world, thank you for your generous hospitality Ms Green grass.” Astorias face dropped “green green .. she muttered, haha don’t be silly you must get use to calling me Mrs Malfoy”. Now despite y/ns fondness to antagonise Astoria at any given opportunity she couldn’t help but see she was visibly hurt. She immediately began to fumble her words in a bid to preserve her feelings “honestly , Astoria I'm sorry I didn't know the extent of your relationship .. I apologise”. Astoria still hadn’t reacted she stood stationary bottom lip protruding sad and helpless like a lost puppy. Y/n gently squeezed Astorias forearm and began to say “ look you mustn't pay it any mind, Draco wouldn’t dare indulge in any small talk with me about family life .. so don’t stress it congratulations by the way”. Astoria looked up at her with eyes softened . Relief washed over Y/n as she could tell she was receptive to her. Y/n couldn’t help but wonder to herself why he hadn’t mentioned news as big as that , they had worked so closely over these months . To be fair on a good day if you hadn’t known Draco you wouldn’t even know he had a girlfriend let alone fiancé .. or wife ?

Astoria went to talk but just then none other than Draco emerged behind her . His hand came down onto her shoulder. sharply. “ thats enough now sweetheart , I think Daphne was looking for you actually”. There was a weird exchange of eye contact Astoria weakly smiled and left. It was now just y/n and Draco stood before one another. Draco broke the silence by clearing his throat “ Y/L/N, may I interest you in a nightcap in my office ,there are things Id appreciate to discuss before we venture into our new working relationship”. Although slightly bewildered she agreed as after all they were to work alongside one another and she’d rather it be somewhat harmonious than turbulent.

Y/n followed Draco across the length of the great hall and into a pair of grand double doors. The room was vast , books littered the walls as far as the eye could see and in the corner a fireplace roared. Draco stood behind his desk and motioned for y/n to take a seat opposite him. She smoothed the back of her dress and proceeded to make herself comfortable. Draco started pouring whiskey from the crystal decanter into a couple of whiskey tumblers. The burn of the fire whisky ignited as it glided down her throat. The combination of whiskey and champagne left Y/N beginning to feel somewhat merry, she hadn’t really noticed during the quiet sobering conversation with Astoria. ‘So what is it you have in mind Draco?”. His stormy grey eyes peered over at her from behind his glass. ‘Very well” he remarked and manoeuvred himself to Y/NS side of the desk .He perched himself on the edge legs akimbo and both his large veiny hands clasped around his whiskey glass. Y/n inhaled sharply as she averted her gaze from his legs splayed before her. Continuing he said “ As you're aware I have my plans about how Hogwarts should be run , I have a detailed strategy and I plan to implement it as soon as possible .. so what I'm really asking is are you with me or against me because I have no intention of being held back”.

Y/n blinked rapidly .. she was unable to process what he was saying , how could he be so smug thinking he had headmaster place secured already. “ Fuck sake Draco, ok first that wasn’t really posed as an option now was it ?, also enough with belief that its your divine right to just be appointed as headmaster! What makes you think that if you somehow are the headmaster I will just bend at your will? Pathetic!” She scoffed into her drink. Draco began to stifle a laugh “ Ah you do amuse me y/n”, look I'm willing to let you have some creative control … only if you prove to me how badly you so desire it”. His suggestive smile sent shivers up y/n. “Fuck you Malfoy” she hissed and jolted from her seat, once she reached the door she rattled the doorknob but to no avail the door wouldn’t budge. “Open it now” she demanded . Draco slowly sauntered towards her and leant across the door “hmm I thought you liked a challenge .. guess I was wrong this will be no fun after all ” Draco was indeed correct Y/n did enjoy a challenge and he’d be gravely mistaken if he thought she would let him get away without putting up a fight”.

Something switched in Y/n she turned to face Draco who was only inches away. He towered over her with his svelte frame encased in an all black suit. ‘Is this what you want Draco hmm” she said in a sultry tone whilst hooking her finger into his belt loop pulling him closer. You want me to beg ..or would you rather me on my knees .. better yet I could be a good girl and just bend over that desk right now and let you have your way if thats what you want” . Draco's breathing was now laboured within seconds he had pulled y/n in by the waist flipped her round having her pressed against the door, his body weight up against her and his hand holding her arms in place on the door. Y/n could feel the stiffness of his impressive length against her derrière. With a shallow gasp he breathed dangerously close to her ear “ be careful what you wish for ms Y/L/N , I don’t take too kindly to false promises as I always get what I want” . With that he tossed her around to face him .Y/n was now panting her body was burning in desire she wanted nothing more than to drop to her knees there and then. No wonder Astoria was attached to his hip.. if this was anything to go off.

Y/n bit her lip she felt dizzy with emotions . Draco stood before her with a devious smile , his hands soon intertwining at her waist and face buried in her décolleté littering it with kisses making his way down to her ample bosom. Y/n couldn’t help but throw her head back in delight eliciting a small moan. That only became fuel for Draco as he hoisted her leg from the floor and wrapped it around him. It was then Y/n felt a vibration from the opposite side of the door., as if someone had knocked from the outside . It was then followed by a mousy ‘ Dray , are you in there’. Draco paused for a moment grip still tight on y/n. “What is it I'm having a business meeting , i'll be out shortly don’t hover ”. It was clear who it was… the pair unraveled themselves from one another quickly smoothing out clothing and rejigging themselves. ‘Ok let us” let me stop you Draco, Y/n interrupted pressing her finger against his lips to audibly shush him. “ As if you think id let this happen you think you get to fuck me then you do as you please and I a dutiful little lap dog . Pfffft what a joke like it or not I'm going to be your boss so the only way I'm fucking you is in the more figurative sense , now you better hurry up don’t want to keep your fiancé waiting or Is it wife hmmm”. With a quick flick from her wand she sent the door swinging open and promptly stormed out.

The day had finally arrived the great hall of Hogwarts was alive with the buzz of chatter. The sizeable table at the forefront of the hall hosted all the teachers and most importantly both Draco and y/n. Dumbledore made his way to the podium, he produced his wand and placed it at the base of his neck it acted as a megaphone propelling his voice across the hall. “Everybody if I may have your attention please.” The chatter soon died down and everyone eagerly cast their eyes on him. “ Right, I shan’t keep you in suspense anymore , it is time to announce your new headmaster & deputy ’. Both Draco and y/n fidgeted in their seats after all these months of rivalry it had boiled down to this. “ Ladies and gentlemen, introducing Ms y/n y/l/n your new headmaster !” Boomed Dumbledore. .Y/N shrieked she was giddy with excitement she couldn’t believe she had actually done it. Everyone around her broke out into wild applause there were whistles and jeers laughter overall excitement. She was being ushered by the surrounding teachers to get up to the podium to make a speech. As she was making her way she cast eyes on Draco, there he stood paler than usual and unresponsive he was there physically but not mentally his carcass stood stationary unable to ingest the news he had just been fed.

The days rolled into weeks weeks rolled into months and y/n had almost completed a whole term at Hogwarts. All was going swimmingly and albeit begrudgingly Draco was in-fact a great support on her journey. It was the last night of term and y/n sat a her desk pondering over a mountain of papers. Y/n sighed and cradled her head in her hands , she was exhausted she spent all her time dedicated to the role that she forgot to take time out for herself. There was a knock at the door “Come in” she yelled out. Draco's head emerged around the door. ‘

Oh hey you , come in come in” ushering him to the desk. ‘Oh dear , sucks to be you , regretting the position of power now?” Draco chuckled menacingly. “Ha ha very funny” she uttered dryly. “Anyway , some of the other teachers are going out for drinks but I can see you are busy” said Draco eyeballing the mountains of paper. “Yeah.. I afraid I am , but you enjoy yourself Draco have a drink for me and i'll see you next term” she smiled warmly at him. Draco locked eyes on her , hands stuffed in his pocket he began to fidget. “In all honesty I'm not the fondest of all the people going .. also Id much rather not be at home ..before you laugh or probe why just don’t because I won’t go into it but I can’t bare to spend another moment longer with …her .. so umm yeah , I can help you out here then say you make it up to me buying me a drink later?”

Y/n smirked “You’re quite then enigma aren’t you Draco ..? He raised his eyebrows at her in acknowledgement. “Fine , id appreciate that very much but I am rather tired so if it's not beneath you I can offer you a drink at mine ..”. His eyes flickered up to meet hers , stifling a smile . “Id like that ..”he said softly , ‘well then , let's get to work” y/n smiled. Draco and y/n worked through the night it was filled with chatter and laughter they felt at ease with one another. Once they finished up the momentum continued on at y/ns house. Copious amounts of fire whiskey later they found themselves delving into deeper topics having more in-depth conversations and discovering more about one another. Draco's whole demeanour was very relaxed and this was foreign to y/n. His shirt sleeves were rolled up and tie loosened. ‘You know .. you're an alright person not that much of a pain in my arse surprisingly” Draco chuckled swigging another mouthful of whiskey. “Well thats rich” laughed y/n.

“Right well I've really enjoyed this but its getting late , I can barley keep my eyes open … earlier you mentioned you didn't want to go back so .. you're more than welcome to stay …. Only if you want”. Rattled by the kind gesture he smiled affectionately. Stumbling over his words “umm yeah , thank you y/n you’ve exceeded your generosity let me at least grab us coffee for the morning then. “Sounds like a plan , hopefully you won’t find me a pain in the arse again come morning ”. With a cackle Y/n got up from the couch and showed Draco to the spare room. Once at the door she began to wish him a goodnight. As he went to hug y/n his lips grazed her cheek. Y/n suddenly recoiled , a silence loomed over them as they gazed at one another the emotions of that night in Draco's office flooding back. Y/n could feel the heat surging in her cheeks so she hastily wished him a good night and scurried to her room. Once in the shelter of her room she let out a sigh of relief. She knew it was the right thing to do but my how she craved him.

Draco burst through the door making a beeline for Y/N. He took her into his arms and kissed her with an insatiable hunger. Backing her into the wall he began to rid her of her clothing . Y/n hands clambered at his chest to do same however he abruptly stopped her “ Oh no you don’t , you think I forgot about that little stint in my office huh ? Well I didn't and I've been awaiting the day I get to fuck you senseless Ms y/n … you control me all day and now its y turn to control you .. you will do everything I say do you understand” . Enthralled by his dominance Y/n nodded enthusiastically. “Sorry I didn't hear you “ roared Draco grabbing her face towards his. “Yes who”. “Yes Draco” she moaned . “You can do better than that dear yes who, i'll only ask you one more time or i'll have bent over my knee.. so what will it be?” . “Yes … daddy “ she muttered bashfully. “Thats my girl” he bellowed. He grabbed her and thrust her onto the bed , he unfastened his tie and instructed her to lift her hands above her head. Y/n did as commanded. He bound her wrists up and hooped them over the bed post. “Now, I'm going to have my way with you and you don’t get to touch me understood!” ‘Yes daddy y/n whimpered” “ahh what a good girl you are, ugh the things I'm going to do to you”. Y/ns eyes winded in desire, Draco shimmied y/ns shirt up and instructed her to bite down using it as a makeshift gag. He suddenly began to kiss her lower abdomen slowly sliding off her trousers.

Y/n titled her hips aiding him in taking them off. Draco's eyes lit up upon the discovery of her not wearing any undergarments “oh so you were anticipating me you filthy slut” Draco chuckled darkly’. He teased and taunted kissing her inner thighs only grazing her sex, this drove y/n crazy her body craved him inside her. Draco finally delicately licked a strip against her folds causing her body to crumble at the slightest of his touch. His warm moist tongue began frantically massaging her causing her to rive in ecstasy . His tongue began to vibrate excitedly against her clitoris sending shock waves through her entire body , she bucked her hips in excitement unable to keep her composure as Draco's tongue fixated on lapping up the one spot that drove her insane. Y/n was close he was relentless with his tongue against her swollen bud , just as she was about to finish Draco withdrew. Y/ns face fell in disgust just as she was about complain he plunged his fingers deep inside her ..pumping rhythmically y/ns juices coated his fingers . His other hand sloped around her neck , eventually this caused her to release all over his hand. Draco's pupils now engulfed his eyes …he was enthralled in pleasure watching her crumble for him . “ Aren’t you a good girl , snarled Draco “squirting for daddy , whilst I love it I don’t recall giving you permission to” .y/n squirmed overcome with pleasure unable to respond.

He unhooked her and brought her to her knees. He ripped her shirt from her mouth and produced his veiny throbbing cock dripping with pre cum. Y/n gasped in astonishment and eagerly attempted to take him all in her mouth bobbing her head enthusiastically until her jaw ached and eyes began to stream. He hurled his head back in pleasure as her tongue gently caressed his pulsating tip. “Ugh yeah just like that baby “ he muttered .

Without warning y/n sucked on the tip with vigour. Draco let out a ferocious moan whilst grabbing y/ns hair fashioning it into a ponytail attempting to make her glide her tongue down the rest of his shaft. He couldn’t have her do that for too long as he surely would finish in her mouth. “You filthy filthy girl “ he beamed as he pulled her off his cock . Rocking her head back spiting in her mouth. He brought yn to her feet and began kissing her deeply interlocking his tongue with hers , she yearned so badly to touch him to feel her skin against his. “ Get over here , I want you leant over this bed frame whilst I fuck you .. I'm going to cum on that pretty pussy then I'm going to put it back in understand!” Firmly instructed Draco . “Yes daddy” that’s my girl he cooed. Draco teasingly stroked his member against her entrance this sent shock waves through y/n causing her to gyrate in hopes he would slip in. Draco caught onto this and his hand came down harshly on her derrière .y/n let out a gasp. “Don’t be greedy now” he laughed tightening his makeshift restraints on her wrists. Relentless with his teasing it was a shock to y/n when Draco abruptly pushed into her. Y/n was in euphoria as was Draco as the warmth of her walls swaddled his manhood.

Draco slammed into y/n her body rattling with pleasure, just then Draco felt himself out to release .. so true to his word he instructed y/n to lay on her back so he could empty his contents onto her. He threw his head back in jubilation upon release. As he went to enter her again this time her was slower much more gentle taking y/n into his arms. “How do you want me to finish you off baby?,like this or I could use my fingers?” Y/n shuddered remembering the bliss she was in from his lengthy fingers so it would be a no brainer to opt for them “Fingers please daddy” she uttered softly.

He untangled himself from her stood up and offered his hand . Taking her across the room he sat down in-front of the floor length mirror instructing y/n to sit in between his legs. “If its fingers you was then its fingers you’ll get but your gonna have to watch me”. His large hand sloped up her neck tenderly chocking her whilst his other massaged at her slit . Y/n was still dripping from earlier so it was light work for him to imbed his fingers into her. Y/n couldn’t take it the combination of Draco's fierce unwavering gaze in the mirror and the sheer bliss she felt with her legs quaking she soon released decorating the mirror in-front her. “Ugh your amazing baby” he beamed kissing her forehead gracefully. “Here let's get you cleaned up and we can cuddle in bed”. “Oh my … I didn't peg you as a cuddling type Draco” y/n laughed gingerly attempting to get up her legs still trembling beneath her. “Shut up you” he scolded “when will you learn there’s a lot you still don’t know about me y/n”.

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ccaptain · 2 years

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💥💥💥💥 go wild, summer child

RABIDLY JUMPS U -- @pluvicor

i. kaeya being a top is the normality. if he has to be on top, he doesn't have to think about himself and he'll just focus on being either a mean dom or a sweet one with no emotions involved, it's easy for him to be on top. however....... good luck trying to have him bottom. kaeya being willing to lay under someone and be explored and all vulnerable is a VERY rare treat obtained only if he trusts the other person enough to lay himself bare. so far he's only a bottom with @11fatui and i plan on having it stay that way since kaeya requires a bastardly high amount of energy to have even a sliver of trust from him. it's emotionally exhausting and childe's the only one who has enough patience to deal with it. EXTREMELY vulnerable soft kaeya is priority of venus and their bitchass harbinger childe so they may make me cry with soft and angsty

ii. for the determinator verse: i THINK that celestia has to at least have a minimal, even the most jumbled and loophole-able amount of consent from a person to ''force'' them to ascend to celestia and become a god. otherwise they would have taken kaeya among them ages ago simply to stop him from advancing his plans to restore his homeland. kaeya is a dangerous chessmaster that thinks of everything even in the direst of situations. in this headcanon, i present you: in case celestia was to ever forcefully ascend him, kaeya has left behind MASSIVE domino-like situations that will oscillate between destroying celestia entirely and causing chaos among the gods and inconvenience it greatly. having these consequences ranging from being either the public reveal of the gods and their mortal disguises above with the intel he has/will keep gathering to have organized a full-scale attack to the floating city of the gods, with some strategy to make it fall and crash over fontaine, because if there's a sacrifice he's willing to make it's to crush a place where celestia has planted a puppet. i like kaeya being a genuinely dangerous man with his wits and brain power alone even if its a bit OP as a concept c: as a t(h)reat!

iii. another determinator verse hc: up until he was six, he was unsure if the stand against the gods was a good solution. he was a very diplomatic and calculative child since he was small, having be taught that way. baby kae thought that he would have struck a deal with the beings above them, that they were reasonable and that, one day, he would have made peace with such celestial creatures. it took his mom becoming violently ill because of the curse and not recognizing him in her delirious state to REALLY make the whole thing sink in. picture a crying, worried baby kae reaching for his mom in bed and her either attacking him in fear or asking his father who this child was. big fucking scarring moment for kaeya, who since that way vowed to take an ice mace in the face of every single god in his way :) violently! with a lot of blood in it. not even witnessing the whole calamity and destruction of khaenri'ah shook him that much!

iv. i told u this headcanon already but among the sad i give u goofy: kaeya using the fact that ONE DAY he will die of the curse as a funny guilt trip for EVERYTHING in order to cope with it. childe is about to eat the last bite of a plump fat donut? ''childe can i pls have that? i'm dying, i deserve it? pretty pretty please?'' he doesn't even want to EAT it its just to test his water boo. kaeya wants childes scarf for 0 reasons at all except to snuggle into it? ''childe can i pls have your scarf... i feel so cold... my final hours are approaching... keep me warm and toasty...'' with an OBVIOUSLY very fake sick voice fake whriting in pain. childe refuses him something not angsty? ''i can't BELIEVE you would DENY me THAT when i'm DYING'' VERY POUTY FACE AND VOICE. dramatic ass captain (that would stop if it was making childe feel guilty for real, mind u)

#Determinator at all costs -- (Abyss Soulmates V.)#pluvicor #THANK U. KISSES UR FOREHEAD AND EATS UR LUNCH

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lissalizzie · 3 years

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AS I PROMISED

CHISHIYA X READER - A SOFT ONE ( +18 because of some words I used)

It is really cute I promise, listen to the song while you read... It will give you the vibe

Sorry for any mistakes

You were so tired of waiting...

When you first felt your heart beating faster for Chishiya after one of your first games your never imagined it would be so hard to deal with being in love with him.

The problem was... That guy seemed not to care about a thing... He didnt have friends, he didnt talk about any person in the real world... It was like he was born alone and that scared you as hell cause that made the job of getting to his heart kinda impossible...

It was a little dumb and silly to be worrying about a love in a world like that one... In a reality like that one...But you just couldn't help that... Everytime you saw him it was like you wanted so much to be his... Like you wanted him to saw you too but he never did.

And the days passed, the months passed. You weren't a girl, you were a woman... You didn't like playing more than you were already pushed to...

At some point it started to make you cry to see him because you wanted him to notice, at least, which he didnt seemed to... But that time you were wrong.

The thing was Chishiya was feeling something for the first time in his life, and he wasn't even recognizing it because it was a first time experience.

Seeing you was like another kind of pleasure, a sweeter one, some kind one soft sensation. It wasn't like when he won a game or a card... It was peaceful... Being with you didn't make his body felt like all the adrenaline in the world was in his veins... Is was like... Home... Like he didn't want to run, or hide, or plan anything, or talk... He just wanted to listen to you and watch you... Because you were such a great view for him.

Chishiya was used to paying attention on everything around him, and of course that included you... But at some point your eyes started to be the focus... Because they were like a big, deep and beautiful ocean... And your lips...Do they supposed to shine like that while you talk? Chishiya always catched himself asking those questions.

He was confused, so he kept even quieter than he usually was...

But when he couldn't hide it anymore...He felt like something was exploding inside him. Maybe it was on your birthday when everyone tried so hard to make you happy but he just... didnt show up on that little party cause he was trying so hard to deny his feelings for you like a dumb guy would do... And then when he was coming back to his room late at night he heard you cry... And he knew it was you because he would recognize your voice even at hell after listening to you talking about everything for so long...

You were alone at your room, Kuina had left after talking to you for long hours trying to convince you that... You should only love people that are capable to value the intensity of that love... And she was so right and you were feeling so dumb.

When you saw his cold eyes in the room you almost felt like punching him in the face cause you were so angry. Not cause he didnt come to your birthday party, but because he was acting like a fucking teen and he was a man... How could he manage all those feelings about the games and could not deal with the fact that another person... Liked him? That made you feel like giving up so much, because what was the point of keeping a feeling for someone that made you cry more than made you happy ?

- You know... Looking at me like that wont help anything.

- Oh it will... It will help you to stay alive

Chishiya was smart, he was fast but one of the reasons he liked you back was... You was just as good as him... If not better.

- I didn't even know it was your birthday, y/n

- Don't you dare try playing dumb to me - You was so angry you felt like you were burning. You were so tired of suffering for someone else.

He breathed in and out as he was looking at the ground.

- Okay... I...

- No... This is not about you, there is nothing about you here, Chishiya. If you didn't want me you just had to say no and we would move on. You treated me like a child, you treated me like a girl that would follow you around like a psycho, you didnt respect me . ...because I can deal with anything but I will not accept a fucking man or anyone here looking down on me just because I'm in love... - You words were so heavy it was like anyone could actually touch them. It was clear it was not just because it was in love with him you were gonna give up on who you were or on your well being. - I fucking give up, okay? - You just threw your hands in the airs with sad eyes, you didnt want to but you also didn't see any hope on that cause he never really showed anything to you.

At that moment Chishiya felt that if he didnt make any move he would lost the one thing... He really felt that he wanted and it wasnt artificial and automatic...

We walked till your faces were really close and, for the first time, you saw an expression on his face... fear.

- I... Please, please dont leave, y/n

- Why? So you can still doing what you're doing? I'm not here for you to use me

- Can you just... Let me talk ? I... I'm afraid... Okay? I'm afraid, y/n. I never felt anything like that... I never was afraid to lose someone... I never... - He touched your hair, his eyes passing through the details of your face. - I never felt like my world was about anyone else other than me... And now it seems like it is... And I'm so afraid cause I feel vulnerable like I never did in my life... it's terrifying. - He confessed. - I'm not the kind of guy who talks... I'm not the kind of guy who knows how to... you know... expresses himself... This is me, y/n. But somehow I... Let's say... the thought of losing you on game is even more terrible as the one of... me dying on a game... And it's weird but when I think about something... You... - He closed his eyes... he wanted so much to talk but it was always so hard... like something was there trying to stop him.- Just dont leave... Because I am here waiting for you to come back everytime you leave... You matter to me... And I want to know how it is... To matter to someone else too... and to do it together. I'm sorry if I hurt you... I never meant to, and I'm sorry I acted like a jerk cause I really wasn't paying much attention on my behavior... You didn't deserve that... But please... If you could give me a chance... To show you I'm not about... what you saw

You were do shocked you couldn't even say a complete word. It didn't make any sense... Why was he being like that? It was so... dreamy it almost didn't feel like reality and that's what you were so afraid about.

- You know I'm not like those idiots you try to confuse, right ?

- Oh, for god's sake - He took your hands and you both sat down on the bed. - If I was trying to confuse you I would be using your weak points... Like the fact you didnt had sex in like a year and you're physicall as hell... Or... I would be using that perfume you told Kuina you liked so you would be considerably distracted cause you already have feelings for me... Yes you should be more careful who you tell your secrets to, by the way... - He laughed - I wouldn't be showing you all my weaknesses if I wanted to do something to you, y/n

Well... You knew him enough to sense a little bit of sincerity there... And you felt like you could trust him... As risky as it sounded... But falling for him was already risky.

- So why are you telling me this ?

- Cause I can't take this alone anymore... And I really feel something about you... And it is good I guess... so...

You just smiled and, softly, you kissed him. He touched your face and... You thought it would never gonna happened but it was and it was just right.

#alice in borderland #chishiya x reader #chishiya #Spotify

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capri-ramblings · 4 years

Text

Okay so, I'm sure it's been kinda obvious I've been down with writer's block due to the lack of actual content on my blog recently, but somehow while scrolling through Tumblr I came upon @tsuisute 's art of Lilia wearing a rather risque bat lingerie and somehow something in my self-doubting brain clicked and I came up with this short fic. It starts off pretty angsty and I'm not sure when part two is going to come out but basically it's Lilia coping with his young s/o going through a really low point in their lives but yeah, I'm sorry if this turned out kinda flat cause my writing gears are still pretty rustic but I couldn't get it out of my head until I started writing it down. So, hopefully it's good enough! 💖💖

Safe and Sound

Summary: A slight rise in detachment and tension has been visible in you lately and being the ever observant Fae he is,Lilia has a hunch it has to do with your work as a medical mage working in devastating war fractions. He tries to reach out to you, but you keep your distance. At the end of it all, will this cause a bigger gap in your relationship or will it bring the two of you closer?

Part One: To push away one's heart.

The door to the age old manor, closed heavily behind you. The after echo of your footsteps shuffling inside softly whispering into the ancestral walls.

It was odd to have come home to such a quiet place after staying a whole day at a warring border. You felt out of place,detached even. As if this house you grew up in felt horribly unfamiliar. Sometimes it scared you, and sometimes it made you sad. Either way, you tended to avoid anyone in the household from interacting with you after your working hours.

Well,you tried your best to avoid everyone at least. Lilia would always be an exception, and not because you didn't have the heart to ignore him but instead you couldn't ignore him. He'd flock right over to you the moment he'd know you were home and then anything you said to make him leave failed.

He'd always had a mind of his own after all. Things people said went through his head but it didn't necessarily mean he'd take them into consideration. It all came down to the fact that Lilia was always the one with wisdom and truth, he's lived long enough to write books on it, so maybe in a way him interrupting your Isolation was a good omen in disguise, but still, it had you gritting your teeth each time he came up to pull you in an embrace or pat your head.

Today seemed to be no different, as you made your way to the staircase and saw Lilia waiting at the top of it with his usual beaming grin.

You didn't want to meet his gaze then. Something inside of you churned and boiled at seeing someone be so comfortable and gleeful.

"Welcome back,little lantern!" Lilia greeted,his deep red eyes sharing the smile he wore on his lips.

You felt your brows furrowed, but answered him with a slight nod. "Where's Silver and Malleus?", you asked as your bristled pass him at the top stairs and headed for the hallways that lead to the rows of bedrooms. Lilia followed behind you.

"They've gone off, somewhere,well, Malleus went off somewhere then Silver went to go look for him"

"Sebek?", You glanced over your shoulder. Lilia lent a smile your way.

"Training, as always. He wanted to tag along with Silver, but he has a competition later this month, Silver told him to stay and practice"

You let out a small hum, your pace absent as you walked right pass your bedroom door and Lilia had to tell you you had missed it. And as he went to push open your door, your limbs felt forlorn and worn out. There was such a strong urge to simply just fall flat onto your bedroom floor and pass out, but Lilia kept his careful gaze on you and ushered you inside the room, with your bag already in his grip.

Years living with him, and you still couldn't fathom how he did certain things without being noticed.

"A whole day and you've already forgotten where you sleep. Tsk,tsk,tsk...my little lantern has lost their touch of home"

With your back to him as you took off your jacket, Lilia came and wrapped his arms around your waist,the sudden warmth of his body pressing up against you causing you to go stiff.

"Lilia–"

"You should stay home for the week". He murmured,soft and low it sounded almost as if he was pleading.

You placed your hands over his on your waist.

"I can't. They're already short handed over at the border, and even if I am just a medic, it'd be too chaotic to just leave them like that"

"You need your rest, lantern"

"Then leave me alone."

The words left you bitter and taut. A string of unsaid wounds lingering at the back of each enunciation you gritted your teeth on. Your hands clenched over his and the way your chest heaved gave the impression that you could hardly take in another breath.

Lilia released you, and you walked over to your desk and sat down. Your head hurt, and your heart didn't seem to know why it was aching.

"I just need to be alone is all. I don't need you to dote over me,Lilia,I just..."

What did you want? Peace maybe. After seeing all that bloodshed in a single land while its people dropped dead like flies, two years working as a medical mage felt like an eternity of attempting to save people who had half of their bodies blown off as they cried and begged and sputtered out blood.

You wished you'd gone blind, but then again the screaming would have haunted you all the same.

Warring fractions were just a few in the Fae Kingdom, mostly because the lands and people involved in it would've died out before help could even reach them, but still, those that remained became cursed and bloody. A sight you wished you could burn out from your very thoughts.

You never had talent like Silver or Sebek, let alone Malleus himself, but Lilia said you always had a knack for healing, always being the caretaker even amongst your peers. Thus, you dedicated yourself to the one thing you were good at and became an active medical mage. From in-house check ups to risking your neck at war borders, you did what you could and suffered from what you couldn't.

You wanted to save everyone on the field, dying or not,but too many times you saw that hope of yours crushed right before your eyes, and it took its toll on you. At night, you hear the warning sirens and in the morning when you wake up, you dreaded to see the smiling faces of your companions, because you've started to wonder if by horrible fate itself, they laid dying in front of you, could you actually help them?

Vehemently, you pushed back the cry burning in your throat and shut your eyes tight.

'Forget it' . You told yourself. 'You don't have to remember. Just forget.'

It hurt for Lilia to watch you then. Something other than paternal grief overwhelming him. He'd known you've been dragging your own spirit down for a while now, but you were so adamant on avoiding the topic, he hesitated on confronting you about it. After all, it was your pain, your own sorrows, who was he to demand you to show him the scars and wounds you hid away?

He wanted to help you, to do anything he could to soothe your ache. But he couldn't do a single thing if you wouldn't let him.

"I'll leave you be then" Lilia said,soft and endearing, almost as if he was cooing to a child. "Rest well,my little lantern"

#twisted wonderland #twst #twst wonderland #twisted wonderland scenarios #twisted wonderland fanfic #twst wonderland angst #twst angst #lilia vanrouge #lilia vanrouge x reader #twst lilia vanrouge #twst lilia

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shra-vasti · 3 years

Text

MAKES ME WONDER [6/40] The Longing

→ Synopsis : Your dream to attend a Seventeen concert was finally coming true but you weren't prepared for the events that were going to follow after Joshua made eye contact with you and chose to make you his partner for the mini game and take you out on a date as a winning prize.

→ Genre : fluff, a little bit of angst

→ Type : Idol x fan au

→ Word count : 1.3k

→ Taglist : @mngyuheart @vannie24 @uglyratlmao @rjsmochii @dwcljh @noniesgirl @yuriewolfhard @jisungsdreamy (let me know if you want to be added to the taglist)

→ Pairing : idol!Joshua x fan!reader

→ Main Seventeen Masterlist

→ Makes Me Wonder Masterlist

Joshua kept on looking towards the retreating car till it was out of his sight, he sighed tiredly, why was he feeling so nostalgic and empty?

He shook his head, knowing all too well where his feelings were trying to lead him but he couldn't allow himself to go through them, you were just one of his fans, he wasn't allowed to be committed to anything other than his work.

He made his way towards the hotel room but before he could reach his room he felt someone tap his shoulder. He turned around gulping to see his manager with a not so pleasant look on his face.

"I want to have some talk with you."

"Yes, come in."

He opened his room door inviting his manager hyung with him and made himself comfortable in his bed whereas the manager sat in one of the chairs near it.

"You do realize that there can be numerous disadvantages of your irresponsible shenanigans right? I left you alone because I thought you were responsible enough."

"Im sorry Hyung."

The manager just looked at him knowing him all too well that he won't say anything and just listen to him blabbering till he quit and leave and he had known Joshua since their debut.

"Joshua, I didn't inform PDnim about this."

The confession made Joshua look up to his masher with a complete shock, he had been making up his mind and practicing his sorry speech to face PDnim only for him to realize that they didn't tell him.

"W-what?"

"Joshua, I know you since a long time ago and I know you are responsible enough to never put your group's image in danger and I know how much you've been dying to have a day where you could be you, you had the chance you took it, I'm not angry at you but just a little bit frustrated. I know you but not the fan, I wouldn't mind you running off alone but what if that fan posts something on social media or uses it against you?"

Joshua laughed feeling somewhat relieved that he was surrounded by people who understood him well.

"She didn't even ask me for my autograph let alone a selca together hyung, she even paid for this cap and neck scarf to help me disguise and she didn't take me to any of the crowded places, she just showed me some of the most beautiful places I've been and let me enjoy my peace alone."

The manager gave him a confused look.

"She didn't even ask for your selca? What in the world was she thinking while being with you the entire day?"

"I don't know, maybe her prime goal was to see me happy."

He smiled at the manager who gave him a suspicious look in return.

"You gave her your number or asked her hers?"

"Neither, she doesn't have any physical memory of being alone with me but a mental one aside from these things she bought for me of course."

He chuckled biding his manager goodbye immediately feeling the heaviness of his heart return, he didn't understand why he was missing you so much.

He was about to close the door when a hand stopped it and he looked up to see Seungcheol, Jihoon, Wonwoo and Jeonghan standing in front of his door with a pointed look.

"Come in."

He sighed as others pushed passed him and plopped upon his bed or the chair.

"What was going on inside that head on yours?"

Jeonghan flicked his forehead as soon as he laid down beside him and he winced in pain.

"Joshua, I didn't expect this from you, do you realize how worried the manager hyung was?"

"You were never so spontaneous Hyung."

Joshua sighed as the four just looked at him, wanting to hear a clarification. He laid back down on his back, arms and legs spread widely as he looked up at the ceiling with a faraway look.

"I don't even know what I was doing, I was just talking with her and then she suggested me the idea playfully when I told her I sometimes wish to live as a normal person just for a day and then I just led her on not having a single care, but I really enjoyed it, it was one of the best day of my life."

The four just exchanged a look before Jihoon continued.

"Hyung, she was the same girl you gave the flowers too right? I saw you giving her and then you chose her for the dance competition too and then you win and you got to have a date with her and then you ran away with her for a day, what's all of this?"

"I don't know, I seriously don't know what I am doing, she's just a fan and I would probably never see her but she made me take so many actions which I never thought would take and I surprisingly didn't feel bad I actually liked it."

There was a long pause after he said that, none of the boys said anything as Wonwoo's eyes suddenly widened in realization.

"Hyung…"

Everyone looked at him in anticipation by the look on his face and his dumbstruck smile.

"What?"

"You have a crush on that fan isn't it? You like her, I can see it in your face Hyung, I was the same before I realized I was in love with Mina too and I still have that look even when she's with me."

All of the eyes were now on Joshua but he just looked at Wonwoo with a blank expression not being able to digest the fact, did he really have a crush on a fan that he wasn't going to see anytime in the near future?

"Her name is Y/N right?'

Jeonghan asked as Joshua nodded his head slowly.

"Beware Joshua, I don't trust her, you never know she is doing all of this to get closer to you, she could be a really sly sasaeng fan for all we know."

Joshua looked at Seungcheol, he did have a point but Joshua was sure you weren't someone like that, he wasn't going to argue with his leader for a fan who he wouldn't probably see anyway.

▫️▫️▫️▫️▫️▫️▫️▫️▫️▫️▫️▫️▫️▫️▫️▫️

You reached your apartment and as soon as you did a really excited Miu tackled you in a mind crashing hug. You groan in pain pushing her off you, taking your coat and showing off you made your way towards the couch and sit on it feeling your body ache due to exhaustion.

"How was the date?"

Miu asked, handing you the water bottle which you gladly accepted.

"It was great, much better than I thought, I was nervous about it for a bit but I got the hang of it but I miss him already."

Your voice was low as you leaned sideways on the armrest of the sofa which gave Miu an access to see your face clearly.

"Did you cry?"

She grabbed your face with her hands to make you look up at her, she was worried about you.

"I miss him Miu, why is my heart feeling so heavy?"

You hugged her as you let out another sob.

"I'm just his fan, but why do I feel as if I've lost someone who was so dear to me."

Miu just stroked your hair as you let out your feelings, feeling bad for you. Of course you were going to feel sad about biding him goodbye, she understood because she would have felt the same if she was in your place.

"Everything will get back to normal, wanna have some food with me? I'm hungry."

You nodded your head slowly walking to your bedroom to get fresh as Miu prepared dinner.

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papergirllife · 4 years

Text

" Without you I feel dizzy and sad, I feel low. " + Lucas

" Stop drinking, Y/N. I bought you along to meet new men, not get your sorry ass drunk over your ex. "

" Shut up, Yeri. It's only been three days. "

" It has happened for like what? Over a hundred times. You should seriously move on to someone better, this on and off thing won't work out in the long run. "

" But I don't feel the same way towards anyone else. "

You said as you took another shot from the table, the alcohol making your throat burn.

Yeri was going to give you another lecture from the look of her eyes, but she was interrupted by a handsome man asking for a dance.

" Go. I'll be fine. Let me sort out my thoughts for a while. "

" Stay put okay? I'll be back. "

You were going to down another shot when you realised that you ran out. You walked towards the bar stumbling into people, as you could feel the alcohol fogging up your mind.

As you walked towards the bar, you bumped into someone.

" Sorry. "

" Y/N ? "

" Lucas? "

" Y/N. You're drunk. I'll take you home. "

" No! I don't ever want to see you again. "

You pushed him away and continued your journey to the bar.

You ordered six more shots and downed them on the spot, not bothering to carry them back to your table as you're drinking alone.

Unbeknownst to you, Lucas was standing not far away from you, his heart clenched in his chest as he sees the pain he has inflicted upon you, regretting the fight the both of you broke out the other day.

You sat on the bar stool, dejected at the fact that you can't get him out of your head, nor your sight.

You tried to move on, you really did. But the memories and hardships you and Lucas had shared was an arrow in your heart.

You tried dating other guys, but called it quits when all you felt from the relationships were unsatisfaction and a sense of emptiness.

Your tears started to fall as you could feel the pain seeping into your heart, it was like poison, slowly killing you.

You ordered a glass of whisky to numb the pain, glass after glass, you could feel yourself losing grasp of reality.

Before you blacked out, you could feel a pair of strong arms lifting you up, and a pair of worried eyes staring at you.

You were still tipsy when you regained consciousness. You could feel a pair of strong arms carrying you around, there's only one person with a decent amount strength that could do that.

" Lucas? "

" Y/N? You're awake? Hold on for a while, you changed your key code to your door so I took you to my place. "

You felt Lucas set you down on a bed. You opened your eyes to see your boyfriend, correction, ex, standing in front of you.

You bolted up in a sitting position on the bed, your drunken state forgetting of your lack of balance under the influence of alcohol.

You grabbed onto his hands and looked into his eyes.

" Why did you help me? We broke up. Why are you here for me when you left?! Why?! Do you know how shit my past few days were?! Do you have any idea what you keep putting me through?! I don't even know why I keep going back to you! Why did I fall for you?! Of all people?! I'm so tired of making the same mistakes over and over again! All for you! "

At this point your whole face was stained with tears, the ache in your heart was unbearable, you don't even understand how it hurts physically, but it just does.

Lucas had sat down next to you on the bed when you stopped speaking.

" I'm sorry. I know now, that it was extremely immature of me. I shouldn't have fought with you over the little things. I shouldn't have said you were nagging me when you were just being caring. I'm sorry, I'm sorry I caused you so much pain for all the times we fought. This is the first time I've seen you during one of our breaks, the way you were drinking to forget your heartache made me realise what a dick I am. I'm sorry. I love you, Y/N, I truly do. I don't deserve you and I'll respect your decision if you choose to end our relationship permanently. "

Lucas's last sentence ended in a whisper, it was one of the most painful things he had ever said in your relationship.

There was never once that he suggested to end things permanently with you, but seeing you in this immense amount of pain knew that this time is different from all the other times. It was like the drop of water that broke the dam, it'll take a long time to patch things up this time around.

But Lucas decided that if you let him, one last time, he would give everything up for it.

Looking back he knew it was dumb that the both of you fought, he was so stupid for staying out late with the boys for drinks, he knew it made you worried of him, but he still did it.

He would've kicked himself if he could go back in time. The events from the night you fought came back to him.

It was around 4am and he had came home, absolutely wasted and pissed off at something, waking you up and he said some mean things that made you leave. It was utterly dumb of him.

He looked at you, snapping out of his thoughts. He could see how tired you were, and skinny. He could tell you haven't ate much these past few days.

Your chest was heaving up and down as you tried your best to recollect your thoughts and swallow down your tears to speak properly.

" How could I leave you? Without you I feel dizzy and sad, I feel low. There's no way I'm going to survive without you. And to be honest, I don't know if that's a good thing or bad thing. "

Lucas pulled you close gently, trying to show you with actions that he is going to stay from here on.

When you made the effort to hug him back, your body let out another round of sobs.

" Don't leave me anymore. Please, my heart can't handle this sort of pain anymore, I feel like I'm dying from a heartache. "

" I'm sorry, love. I'll make it up to you, I promise. "

" Are you sober enough to stand up? "

You nodded.

Lucas stood up and took your hand into his, taking some clean clothes from his closet and leading you to the bathroom.

" Take a shower. "

After your shower, you tried your best to blow dry your hair in your semi intoxicated state but stopped and padded out to the living area when your head got too dizzy.

Lucas had already changed into his sleep clothes and was lying on the sofa, when he saw you he smiled, he always thought you looked best in his clothes.

" Take the bed. I'll sleep on the couch. "

You walked towards him and laid down on his welcoming chest.

" I'm not sleeping alone anymore. It feels lonely. Sleep with me. "

" Are you sure? "

" Yes. "

" You're going to regret this in the morning, but I'm too tired to argue with your drunk ass. "

Lucas once again carried you to the bed and laid you down, he slips into bed next to you, holding you close, as you fall into a peaceful sleep you haven't had in days.

When you woke up, you thought you were dreaming. But the feeling of Lucas's arms wrapped around you felt too real.

You closed your eyes and recountered what happened the night before.

' Fuck, I was supposed to be broken up with him. ' You thought to yourself.

You didn't know how to take in the situation you were in. You were promised yourself to stay away from him, but here you are again, back in his bed. But on the other hand, Lucas made a promise, to never hurt you that way ever again.

How are you going to make a choice?

When you felt movement next to you, you quickly shut your eyes.

You could feel Lucas's arms wrap around your torso tighter, as if he didn't want to let you go.

You could feel his neck nuzzling into your hair, as he inhales the sweet scent of your hair.

" Why do you like to smell my hair in the morning? "

" Because you smell like a combination of you and me, reminds me what a lucky man I am. "

You shudder at that thought. It made you realise how much you love this man, and that even though the both of you don't see eye to eye sometimes, there were also many happy moments.

Lucas must've felt your shudder, because he pulled the blankets higher, thinking you might've been cold.

' He cares for me like no one else. '

To your dismay, Lucas got up and wrapped the blankets around your body.

You could hear him opening and closing kitchen cabinets.

" Where the fuck did I put the Advils? "

You let out a tiny laugh, but quickly biting onto your tongue when you heard his footsteps nearing.

He set down a glass of water, as he takes a seat beside you on the bed.

" Y/N, wake up. You need to eat something, all that drinking from last night without any food intake is bad for your stomach. "

You opened your eyes to see Lucas smiling down at you as he holds the Advil and the glass of water for you.

After you swallowed the pill, Lucas looks at you nervously.

" Do you remember anything from last night? "

" Yeah, I remember the things we said here. Not much from the club. "

" I meant it, every word from last night. "

" No more fighting? "

" No more. " He said as he holds you close.

You nuzzle your face into Lucas's neck, loving the warmth it provides, something you always did whenever you woke up in his arms.

You start peppering kisses on his neck, slowly moving downwards.

Your hands itched to take off his shirt when he stops you.

" I want it to be about you baby, lay down. Let me make it up to you. "

Lucas trailed kisses all over you as he laid you down, removing the clothes he had given you from the night before.

He places a kiss on your covered womanhood, sending shivers up your spine.His fingers reach out to cup your vagina.

" You're already so wet for me, love. "

He hooks his thumbs beneath the waistband of your panties and pulls down.

The sight and the scent of your sex ignites a fire in him.

" I missed you, baby. " He says before he dives into your vagina.

He gives your pussy a fat lick as his fingers rubbed circles onto your clit.

" Fuck, Lucas... "

His fingers stop its ministrations as Lucas switched it to his lips, sucking and lightly biting on your abused clit, sending shocks straight to your already dripping core.

By now his sheets are ruined with your juices, you look up to see the sight of Lucas eating you out made you even wetter.

Lucas slipped in two fingers into your core as he sensed you getting closer to your high.

You thread your fingers into his smooth locks of hair, giving him encouragement.

He stops sucking at your clit and used his other hand to lightly flick and pinch your clit, he always knew you loved it this rough with him.

He scissors you open with his two fingers and fucked his tongue into you, the way his fingers move out as his tongue moves right back in made the coil on your stomach tighten.

" Fuck, Lucas. I'm going to cum. "

If he heard you he didn't say anything, but speeds up his actions, his patience running thin for a taste of your essence, you cum all over his face. But this time felt different, this orgasm felt stronger.

You sat yourself up to see that Lucas's whole face was wet.

" I am so going to make you squirt again."

Let's just say you guys aren't getting out of bed anytime soon, with hundreds of missed calls and texts from Yeri.

To request, follow the link below ❣️

https://papergirllife.tumblr.com/post/615715974898974720/300-followers-milestone-prompts-hi-guys-i-just

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well-shit-im-a-morosexual-now · 3 years

Note

Time to talk about Lillith :)

So her being MC's ancestor in the story was... A bad choice, in my opinion.

And I don't hate that she was the one who revived MC, quite the opposite, that was a fine move. I like to think that it was to show that MC had a connection to all the siblings, dead or alive, hate or love. It's just...

Why are they (technically) related? What was the purpose?

That could sound mean, but if some of your playbase could call incest and (possibly) have a leg to stand on, it's a bit... Much, let's say. But, either way, there is an alternative that I like. (And one I made up, but that's besides the point.)

I like the idea that Diavolo lied to the brothers to keep the peace. To me, it makes sense, because:

He needs to keep the peace between the three realms, and y'know, one of the humans dying kind of prevents that. So, why not lie to them to make sure this never happens again?

It would also get to a quick resolution for the brothers, since I'm pretty sure that Belph was about to kill MC... Again.

Sadly, I only have two reasons, but you're smart, you can probably expand upon this.

Anyway, this might be a bit sloppy, but I hope you can understand what I'm trying to say.

Your Anonymous Color Coder,

Lesson 42 Anon

(P.S. I have issues with Lesson 16, 17, and 18. I say this just in case I want to rant about it. :)

So initially I wasn't the biggest fan of them being related, though when they first started hinting at a connection between Lilith and MC I had a "OH GOD. OH DAMN. PLEASE DON'T BE LILITH'S REINCARNATION" moment so finding out MC was just a distant relative was a relief but not one I was necessarily happy with? Because of all the "Is this technically incest!?" feelings I had at the time.

But it did grow on me? I think all the human au's I had roaming free in my head helped me get over it? When writing or thinking up human Aus I try to make them as close to the Canon situation as possible so it'd be:

The brothers and Lilith all living in a foster home with only Lucifer and Satan being blood related, but they all see each other as a found family. MC would be a distant (and I mean distant enough it equals to the thousands of years that separate Canon MC and Lilith) cousin who they don't even find out is related to Lilith until much later (after Lilith either leaves and joins a more permanent family or....well dies I guess).

The way I see it, it'd be the same as a group of "we're so close we see each other as siblings" friends wanting to date the distant/estranged relative of one of the group members.

So yeah, now I see the whole Lilith, MC, brothers thing as "Incest if I'm willing to reach so far my arm tears straight outta my socket" so yeah.

Though obviously it's completely valid if people are still uncomfortable with it.

ANXUSJWMNZRATQVX8 Belphie would have totally murdered MC if they didn't bring up the whole Lilith thing! And I'm so upset they all just get over it? Like damn I love Belphie no lie, but are we just gonna gloss over the fact that he was 110% okay with the genocide of the entire human race???????

I also have this headcanon that MC has chronic pain that flares up on and off after Belphie murdered them, cause remember how the ghost of the fortune teller,Gisella (?), on the train said you never forget the feeling of dying and MC had a pretty violent death so.....

I also HC that there are days, specially when the pain is bad, where they can't stand to be near Belphie and that while he was initially upset by this and was persistent about still being with them by around mid S2 or S3 he's learnt to identify those days and understand why MC can't even look at him then and he makes himself scarce and sleeps away the day in an out of the way dark, corner probably with Beel around for emotional support because honestly those days would hurt him as much as MC.

I like that in the Canon storyline that none of the brothers were 100% okay with Belphie right after Lesson 16 and how they went out of their way, more so than usual, to make sure MC wasn't alone with him? I maybe reading into that too much but I liked it..

And I mean generally MC's a very calm, collected, headstrong and stubborn character so as frustrating as it is I understand why they would want to help Belphie get along with the others again. "I died for this shit, so I might as well see it through" kinda mentality

I didn't initially like the two timelines cause it made me really sad imagining the one MC left behind and to ease that angst I always imagined since MC changed the past their original timeline -the future timeline- got erased with a new future unfolding. but someone on tumblr posted a headcanon with evidence on why they thought Barbatos joined the two timelines together so that they live with the extra day of memories and experiences that came from the original timeline AND I JUMPED THE HELL ON THAT BOAT & actually recently wrote something about it. Here have the link and some shameless self promotion cause I'm an attention whore:

Deadlines

"When Mammon meets his soulmate he's going to punch them in the face. It doesn't matter if he'll only find out who exactly his soulmate is when one of them is on their deathbed. He's still going to punch them."

Um anyway that's all my thoughts on 16, 17 & 18 (I think. There might be more that I can't remember at the moment tbh) and since I rambled to you about it you are now contractually obligated to rant to me about yours. Sorry, those are the rules🤷🏽

About the thing you said about Diavolo and his reasons I honestly have nothing else to add, I mean the reasons you gave make total sense and I'm okay with just what the canon gave too so

It wasn't sloppy at all! My rambles are always too long and all over the place!

Edit: I forgot! As to why they were related, yeah I don't think it was completely necessary but still I can see reasons behind it?

1. As a way to make MC other. A devilgram and a little line in S3 makes it seem like MC is neither angel, demon OR human. I HC that Lilith died right as she was changing from angel to demon making her one of a kind and that pure "Fallen Angel" magic came with her when she was reincarnated and then was passed down to MC.

2. How lilith's known as the mother of monsters in some myths and how MC is related to them... I just think it's neat. Plus MC has an insane amount of raw power - truly a monster in their own right

3. It's closure for the brothers. They never got to see Lililth as a human, never got to see her grow up, fall in love, start her own family. The last they saw her she was in pain and dying. They don't get to see if she was happy. MC's the closest proof they have to that. That she found love and had a family and was happy

4. It's closure for lilith. Just the fact that her spirit passed down from descendent to descendent along with her magic till she could see her brothers again just to see if they were happy and to tell them she had lived a long happy life. I don't know I'm really happy she was able to do that

5. The brothers find similarities between Lilith and MC but they're rare and 6 of the 7 brothers already liked MC before they found out about MC being her descendent. And even Belohie starts to like them as their own person. Just I always worry that they like MC just because of the connection between them and Lilith and that they see MC as a replacement but then U remember their Canon interactions and it feels like the brothers actually forget about that connection. MC is Lilith's legacy, they're living proof that you can be born in one world but find your true home in another, but they're not defined by Lilith. They're their own person. Even their magic is their own considering Lilith used the last of hers when she helped them in Lesson 15/16

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me!#shall we date? obey me!#swd obey me #asks #answers #my headcanons #my theories #obey me lilith #obey me belphie #swd lilith #swd belphie #om! belphie #obey me belohegor #om! belphegor #swd belohegor

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mochikeiji · 4 years

Text

Sunshine

↠ Pairing: Bokuto Koutarou x Akaashi Keiji

↠ Warning: TimeSkip AU! Slight angst, fluff! Weathering with You AU

↬ Word Count: 1,851

↣ a/n: I just love Weathering with You. The prompt fits so perfectly I just had too ヽ( ´¬`)ノ even hearing the ost in my head while writing this.

Summary: Akaashi has lived his life raising the sun as he prays. But that came to a stop when Bokuto finds out the consequences. Afraid to lose him, afraid of him to disappear without having to feel what happiness is, he wants him to live his life to the fullest.

⇢ Day 8: Weather/Rain, Magic @bokuakaweek2020

✎﹏

Not many have fallen inlove with the gloomy skies that cried heavy down pours of rain. Not many appreciated the satisfying sight of the droplets patter from their window or hydrate the plants. People would see the rain as some sort of hindrance due to the natural disasters it has caused. Those such as flooding, cancelations of plans or the weird feeling of getting sad from it.

Japan at this year has been experiencing all of these emotions. The rain poured everyday endlessly. In some parts it has, but after a few minutes of hours it'll pour once more. The children were stuck inside their homes, whining sometimes for not being allowed to go out and play as they used to. Adults are always getting irritated when travelling to work. Not a day is completed without having one part of their body soaked from the rain when coming back home.

When has it been the last time they've experienced the warm sun and bright blue skies? When was the last time they have woken up to hear the birds chirping rathet than another round of padding droplets on their windows and rooftops?

If they'd predicted the weather to be in bad shape, people would've appreciated waking up a little early to show some love for the shining sun rather than wishing it hadn't risen.

For Bokuto, he didn't care about any of these calamities. He didn't pay attention to the murmurs and curses about the weather from the people he had passed by the streets, nor the fact that he sometimes gets soaked from the rain or even having his usual volleyball practice get cancelled.

All he cared about with all his heart was the man who had been destined to be his lover.

Also the man who was in full control of controlling the all powerful, bright sun and stopping the rain as he pleases whenever he would pray.

His sunshine boy.

"Keiji, I told you to stop looking over the request anymore."

Snapping his gaze away from the phone screen, Bokuto had snatched it away and places it on top of the coffee table. Taking a seat next to Akaashi and took a sip of the warm hot chocolate he had made for both of them.

"But they were getting mad for not granting their request, Kou.."

Bokuto sees the way his eyes looked down sadly behind his lens. His lips quivering as if he was afraid of something. Guilty of something.

He had no rights to be feeling guilty though. It wasn't his power to control the rain. It wasn't his fault Japan was in this situation for many years. He never asked to be the one speck of hope to bring back the sun even though it meant for a few hours.

It wasn't his or Bokuto's fault they wanted to be selfish.

Akaashi's gift had a risky price to pay. Due to people now knowing his gift, he was often called for so many request to bring the sun out. His request per day would reach 10-20. It was tiring, but this was the only job he had to provide himself. But sadly, to over working himself to the bone, his body began to get transparent. He had been so caught up with his job as the Sunshine Boy he had forgotten he was cursed to disappear to an unknown place if he overused his gift.

And Bokuto didn't want to lose him.

The day Akaashi had revealed his upper body to him, Bokuto's heart shattered. He was the one who had given him the idea of being in this position in the first place. He shouldered the blame on him, for almost unknowingly letting his lover slowly drift away and disappear from him.

But not anymore.

He begged Akaashi to never do it again. Never overuse his power. Allow himself to take a break and just find another job or let him handle all the finance since he was a successful player. But Akaashi didn't like depending all his life on someone, he wanted to be useful. Worthy. Even though Bokuto woukd remind him all the time that he has been more than enough to him, the people from their abandoned website would always call him out and spread hate for his sudden disappearance.

It was a good thing no one knew of his identity. Otherwise he would be hunt down and they'd have to move to places as if they were criminals.

"Keiji," placing his mug down at the table, he moves to his side closer to Akaashi, taking his hand away from his lap and holding it, "Would you be sad if I was the only person who loves you?"

Akaashi never had anyone that loved him so much other than his late mother. Like him, she was born with this gift. His father though, had left the both of them when he knew about their gifts. Angry of why they didn't do something of Japan's situation and cursing his mother for being a selfish woman, leaving her to fulfill her duty until her dying breath and disappearing without a sense of peace.

His words and the people's demands had gone through his head and haunted him. He believed that this was why he was born different. Why he was born with this so called, "gift". He was born to serve other's and grant their request to summon the sun. Nothing more, nothing less. Fulfill his duty to the bitter end.

And Bokuto had proved him othwise.

"From now on, live for yourself, Keiji. You can't give everyone what they want and not leave something for you."

Those were the words he remembered the day he had shown his transparent torso. The words that had made his eyes shed tears and his whole world change.

"I am beyond already happy and blessed to have you as my lover, Kou. And you loving me makes me question why I deserve someone like you," he places his palm on his cheek, stroking it lovingly as he stares back into his golden eyes, "Of course I am happy that the person I love so much loves me as well. Even if he is the only one."

"Then this," glancing at the phine from the table with Akaashi's eyes following his. Returning back to their locked gaze, "They don't matter. Nothing matters but that, Keiji."

His eyes spoke a lot about his deep sadness and guilt. Bokuto pushes his hand away gently and pulls him onto his chest, letting Akaashi sit in between his legs and place his chin on his shoulder.

"Keiji, I don't want to wake up one day and see you gone from my sight."

Listening intensely as he feels his hair being weaved by his fingers, he allows his body to relax on Bokuto's hold and let's him continue.

"Not because you can make the sun appear. I don't care about those, I only care about you. I don't want you to disappear just to have your entire life serving people for their wants and not living yours."

Suddenly, his shoulder began to form a wet patch from the owl haired male, "I don't want to wake up alone again, Keiji..I don't want to lose the only person I've ever loved and didn't have enough time with him."

Like Akaashi, Bokuto had struggled with his own past. Always getting left behind for pursuing too much ambition. His parents not being able to provide him with the love and support he has envied from so many people. He had sought out on his own trying to find a reason for his living. Why he manages to maintain being a famous volleyball player even though he had no one tovbe proud of not only his talent, but his entire being.

Bokuto's body trembles and Akaashi started to feel himself get emotional and squeezed his arms around his torso. Bokuto sniffles a little before pushing himself off of his shoulder to look him in the eye once more.

"Keiji, to me I believe you are a Sunshine Boy. Not because you can raise the sun, but because you brighten the skies from my gloomy life ever since I've met you."

Eyes widened a little from his words, Bokuto removes his mist filled glasses and leans his forehead to his. Sighing out the emotion that had bubbled up in his chest.

"I believe you had more purpose in life than being like this. Maybe," placing both of his warm palms on Akaashi's cold face, wanting him to open his tear filled eyes.

"Maybe you were meant to live the life your mother wished she had."

A life that didn't pulled him down because of his gift. The life that didn't involve the people's complaints and demands. The life that only his happiness mattered.

"We've made a promise together back then."

Akaashi looks down at his hand, his ring finger occupied with a shining ring that fit perfectly and made his hand look more beautiful than they ever were. The one Bokuto had given the night of his confession.

"That we'd be together forever. That nothing else mattered than for us to find our happiness together."

Akaashi lets his tears fall from his eyes, allowing Bokuto to wipe them away quickly. He gives his lips a lingering kiss. Pouring out the emotions more than the rain outside their apartment.

"The hell with everyone in this world. I want you more than any blue sky. You're the real sun that brightens up my world, Akaashi. I knew what I was getting into the moment I fell inlove with you, there's no way in hell I'm throwing all of this away."

Sobs can be heard from the room, but the strong sense of devotion and love was there. Akaashi lets himself grow vulnerable, murmuring "I love you's" and "Thank you's", squeezing Bokuto as if his life depended on it. Afraid of what his mind could've done if Bokuto hadn't said those words to him immediately.

They both know that this weather wouldn't stop. But they also knew that the people's complaints about everything would never stop.

The hell with everything, they thought.

If being selfish meant letting an innocent life as Akaashi live longer and having the weather stay as it is, then so be it. Nothing is more precious than another ones life.

Nothing mattered to the two lovers as long as they had each other.

The weather can stay crazy, but that's how the entire world is, right?

You needed one thing that is sane in all this madness.

And to Bokuto?

That was Akaashi.

"Koutarou."

"Hm?"

Pushing himself off of his chest, Akaashi wipes his nose with his sleeve before speaking, "Don't you want to see the sun?" his words lacing with worry with his mind racing with thoughts.

Bokuto only smiles at him. Knowing already what he was going to answer, pinching his cheek in the process and grinning,

"I already am seeing the sun, Keiji. And its worth keeping bright more than anything."

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sunagitsunee · 5 years

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Achilles Heel

Hurt / Comfort, Levi Ackerman x Hanji Zoe

POST 115 FIC

ALSO IN AO3

The patterns of the exposed beams of the ceiling were suddenly the most interesting thing in the room.

Levi had been past his major self-loathing stage, one that immediately kicked in after his stupor post the explosion. He’d been through despondency and helplessness after realizing the mishap took out parts of him that were necessary for battle. Denial was there, too, with the fact that he was a diminished version if himself after the accident—that he might not be the strongest one anymore.

What was eating him away was the guilt: survivor’s guilt. Or more so, having to bide his time until he could fully recover just so he could return to the battlefield.

Basically, he had to stay put, bathe in peace, while their allies were dying by the minute.

To him, it was an indirect murder by his hands, because he failed.

Once more he was unsuccessful in fulfilling his promise to his previous commander, just because he was being uncharacteristically reckless. And to make it worse, his current commander was stuck nursing him back to health instead of watching over the poor kids left to finish what they had started.

It was all fucked up.

No—scratch that. It was beyond fucked up.

Levi had already faced all kinds of defeat ever since his memory had afforded to remember. And he thought losing his mother, his dearest friends, his own squad, and even Erwin, were already the peak of the damnation of his existence. He was clearly mistaken.

Because this time, he had lost a little more than himself, and gained back one thing he had forsaken a long time ago.

Well, he had spent the last decade redeeming himself from the clutches of the underground. Humanity’s Strongest Soldier, that was what everyone called him. He walked and talked the reputation. He devoted himself to his host and to the cause of saving humanity that the supposed burden became his second skin, to the point that his emotions got in the way—so he got rid of it.

As they say, they had to become what they wanted to kill. And he, including several other members of the original Survey Corps, became monsters to eradicate other monsters. Living with the armor of ferociousness for so long made him forget what it was like to feel despair. People had died left and right and tears came out reservedly, away from a mere human being’s gaze. No big deal.

Before the accident that rendered him catatonic for days, he had the impression that he would outlive everyone, so he had no problems of thinking about who would die next. Normally, his soul would be crushed and be forced to move on the next second because everyone counted on him to carry on the will of the dead.

However, the brush with good old death had changed things drastically.

He can die, alone and powerless. The truth was cold and unforgiving. It hit him like a brick wall. And he hated it.

Years and years of bravado and confidence had led up to this point. And the biggest problem was, who will carry on his will and those who died before him once he is gone? Who was strong enough to bear all the weight he carried in his back? All the lives which were sacrificed, if he couldn’t let them live on through someone else, would they have been wasted all for naught?

Who would care to remember him if he was to suddenly disappear, and no one else was around?

That was not even the worst.

The most fucked up thing that ever happened in that incident was being in the brink of oblivion, almost fading out, but then meeting the gaze of someone else that was filled with terror and sadness over the fact that he was, in fact, perishing.

It stung so bad, that it made him cower at the thought of biting the dust just like that.

He had never thought about it before, to be honest. But back then during his last breaths, when he had the sliver of chances to look upon the face of the person who was calling him back to reality: he saw that expression. Anguished was not even enough to describe what he witnessed. Fear, confusion, resolve, despair, longing… hundred more waves broke through his savior’s—Hanji's—facade while they held him gently, while he clung to that warmth as if it was his lifeline.

Which was stupid. Because they aren’t normally like that. They’d laugh and shout but not once did they throw those sentiments at him without holding back. They were strong like him. They’d lost people too, but they stood up and fought on.

So why, why did the glimpse of their face in sorrow made his wounds ache a thousand times more than they should?

Pathetic. Levi had convinced himself over these past few days that it should be the last time that he’d let them go through that. He wouldn’t go out like that. He’d never want to see Hanji’s eyes, the most vibrant pair he’d ever met, be clouded again in his dying moments.

He would have to make do of what’s left of him to push through, no matter how lamentable the outlook seemed.

“Knock, knock.”

As if on cue, his rumination was disrupted with the voice that retrieved him from the underworld. The door revealed Hanji’s resigned frame, and light steps against the wood followed after as they approached his rigid figure in the tub.

Levi slowly turned his head towards them and took note of their sullenness behind the pretentious but affable smile.

“What? Don’t tell me you wanna take a bath with me?”

“Maybe. But I suck at doing it. You blasting me with water is still the best way to do it.”

Scoff. “It’ll be a different experience since I have less fingers to blast you with.”

He watched how they winced for a split second, probably a knee-jerk reaction after being reminded of his current setbacks. Hanji finally let out a sigh after holding their breath for several seconds before setting by the floor, absentmindedly playing with his bath water by dipping an entire arm.

“I talked with our hosts. The Azumabitos are displeased with how we are doing. Understandably so. But they are willing to hide us until you’re fully on your feet. Thanks to them, I’ve sent a coded message to Mikasa for our current status.”

“Yeah. And are they still all alive?”

“Presumably. Eren was dead for some time, but as expected of shifters, they can transfer consciousness and heal.”

“Fuck those shifters.” Good thing the kids were still kicking, but man, fuck Zeke and his existence. He spearheaded all this fuckery. And he’s still out there thanks to him.

“Our forces have withdrawn for the meantime… They have control over our new recruits, and most of our leaders have been transformed to…titans… I’ve instructed Jean to gather our remaining allies and rummage for whatever is salvageable. I'm—”

Hanji paused and bit their lip before punching the edge of the tub with their other hand, so hard that he felt the tremors from the impact. Levi knew them all too well, they were frustrated, more so with themselves rather than anything else.

“Damn… We’ve lost so much. I was never suited to be this. I’m such a fucking mess. Erwin would have pulled a miracle out of our asses by now. You know that. I’m sure you think the same way.”

NO! Obviously! Erwin was gone, right? And Levi chose it to be that way. He still doesn’t regret the choice of letting him rest, keeping him safe from this abhorrent world. Except that seeing Hanji at the end of their wits was every bit of torturous for him, too. But still…

“You said it before, Hanji. Outcomes aren’t determined by a single choice. Don’t take all the blame.”

Another fist hit the keg. “But I am at fault. I failed to draw a good gamble, and I got you injured by a flaw in the weapon that I made. I’m… I’m sorry, Levi. I’m not even sure if that amounts to anything anymore….”

Jeez.

Hanji was at it again. His guilt was already a thing, but theirs were like a second punch in the gut. They needed to be coherent as soon as possible for all their sakes, and Levi was one of the handful who could knock some sense into them.

“That’s the fiftieth goddamn apology you’ve managed to spew, and as far as I know, you aren’t supposed to be a deprecatory ass.” He spoke a little louder, making sure to emphasize every word. “Maybe if you stopped gambling and living in Erwin’s shadow and be precise like you used to be, those words would actually bear something.”

They went silent for a while, with only the drops from the faucet accentuating the stillness. Hanji was crouched away from his sight, probably pondering on their shortcomings, wallowing on the hurt from his statements, or perhaps repeating his harsh preaching like a mantra until they were consequential.

In the first place, they were the only person who could read between the lines no matter what foul words he spat out.

What he meant, anyway: Hanji had always been the better person, and if there was anyone who could get their stride back, it was them. They just had to get out of their slump, and they need to be back to their usual self. That he trusted them, and that he would do anything for them.

His speech seemed fruitful, much to his relief. When they straightened up, there were less shadows on their face, albeit the weeks of sleep deprivation and stress made the frown lines seem permanent.

Hanji tapped the surface of the water, purposefully splashing on his body, and some, hitting his face.

“Asshole,” they said. Levi kicked lightly and the ripples overflowed until they got into their clothes, too. He got a stifled gasp as a response.

“That’s the shitty glasses that I know.”

They chuckled but stopped abruptly to move closer until their faces were the same level. Their chin rested against the tub and their fingers hovered on the new scar that adorned his visage.

Caressing without touching, that is. For some reason it relaxed Levi; it was as if they were accepting his impairments instead of intruding upon him. It was their usual dynamic, one that went off-track when the war had started.

A thorn got dislodged from his heart knowing their thing was finally back.

“I’m sorry, Levi. Just this once, I say not as your commander. I truly am sorry.”

He shifted fully to his side so their good eyes could meet. There was something thick building up in his throat; he could have ignored it but decided against it. If he didn’t say it on the spot, he may never have the chance to do so.

“Thank you. And this is personal. You could’ve left me there. A dead man served no purpose to your goals, but you ended up putting your life on the line as well. You’re that dumb, but you saved me. I owe you. Everything.”

Hanji smiled and let their touch graze his jaw, right where the gash ended.

“I will admit, I was being selfish in that one. I could have let you rest, but I was scared. I… couldn’t let you go in the end.”

His chest drummed at their words and how they rolled off from their tongue.

“Scared, huh.“

He was, as well. Openly. For the first time. And if the situations were reversed, he’d risk his life to save them, too. Maybe the fear of losing them was a big part of his weakness now, but it’s a weakness he’d have to live with moving forward. "Maybe we are humans after all…”

“Yeah, you monster… I… just realized I needed you. Only humans do that kind of thing, I guess…?”

Needed. By the way the russet in their eye glinted, he knew they meant it in every sense of the word, and he too, felt the same way. More than they could both comprehend. More than the bonds of the dying breed that they share.

It was needing in a much, much, intimate level. And it took that recent trip to demise to bring those feelings bursting to the surface.

Levi’s hand met theirs, and he immediately appreciated the familiar warmth in contrast with the cold water. He held it down by his neck and rested against their palm. Hanji lightly squeezed on his skin.

“Hey… Don’t die alone, Levi. Don’t die before me. Get our freedom in my stead if I go. Promise me.”

He could feel their breath grazing in his face, and it nearly wanted him to breach the small distance that kept them apart and catch their lips. But no, this was not the time for it. It was unfair. War had no space for such ties.

He decided he would do it when they’re finally free, only then, since they deserved the whole of him. They’d start a new life together, that was his new resolve.

Instead, Levi smiled and brought his handicapped grip to nestle on their cheek.

“Don’t be stupid. If you go down, I go down. If you live, I live. So do your damned best to survive, and I would keep at it too. That’s what I can promise.”

Hanji turned their head to press their lips longingly to his palm before speaking.

“Of course… that seems fair to me.”

#levihan #levi #hanji zoe #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #snk #aot #levi ackerman #mine #i couldn't get this out of my head ugh #anyway

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judgement-free-sideblog · 4 years

Text

Dancing lessons

Barry Berkman x reader

Summary: Barry is finally cast in a feature, the problem? He said he could dance and now he can either disappoint Sally or found a way to learn some steps.

Warnings: Swearing, blood, violence, guns, cheating, drinking.

Part 1 ● Part 2 ● Part 3 ● Part 4 ● Part 5 ● Part 6 ● Part 7 ● Part 8 ● Epilogue

Part 6

The rumor of sheets moving and the muffled steps on the carpet didn't wake you up, the clock in your nightstand said 02:00 pm and you have been sleeping for about half an hour after your spontaneous marital responsibilities, and you were still tired for the sleepless night; it was the sudden loneliness in the bed that felt wrong enough to make you incorporate in the bed.

"I thought the main purpose of getting married was that the guy will no longer leave in a hurry barely putting on his clothes" you told him and he gave you an strange look that made you feel uncomfortable with your nudity and search for a robe to cover yourself.

"I'm sorry honey, there is already trouble with the merge of the new company" He said putting on his pants and searching for a clean shirt on the closet "I had to head for the office, but I'll be home by 9, and we can have dinner"

"I can cook if you want" you said approaching him and helping him with his tie "Your favorite maybe?" You gave him a sad smile knowing too well what by 9 meant.

"Oh no, you should rest, we can go out or order something" There it was, like always an empty promise to hide the fact that he would stay until 10 or 11 pm at the office, and avoiding trouble at home by not making you put on any effort.

"Sure, there is new place a couple blocks from here I want to try" You said now following the lie "Is an Italian place L'angolo delle delizie maybe you could make reservations" You followed him out of the room and gave him the suitcase he left on the ground.

"Sounds great" He said putting on his jacket, he smiled the way both of you knew it meant we are not doing that "Italian sounds great, specially since you eat a lot of Chinese last night" He add completely innocently, but it light all the alarms in your head and protectively grab your phone, even when he was not looking at it.

"I was just hungry" You lied and he gave you a kiss on the cheek before walking away, the steps down the stairs became distant and one final door closed downstairs and then silence.

And like a stupid little child you started to cry holding yourself, until your legs won't hold you anymore and you feel into the floor, tired and angry at yourself, still holding the phone, you opened to see a text from Barry, one hour after the one you sent.

Sorry, I was filming. Doctor said you can't drink, but I'll bring the money. Meet you at 5.

The fact that he was still concerned about your well being made you smile, and then you were angry for smiling so you throw the phone against the wall and screamed in pain.

It was wrong, you felt guilty without doing anything, and the reason was now completely clear, you wanted to, you wanted for him to make a move on you, since you were too much of a coward to do it yourself.

But he wouldn't, he had a beautiful girlfriend, you saw her face popping up in random tv shows and commercials now an then, and you knew the mere reason you have met was to make her happy. He loved his Sally, with a devotion that was longer lost from you and Alan.

You stand up and picked the phone, then you look at your wedding picture, Juntos para toda la vida Together for life, a nice thing Alan Spanish grandma said on your wedding day, and now it felt more like a sentence.

You repressed the urge to cry again and instead change your clothes for something you could dance with. At least exhausted and covered in sweat you could silence your conscience.

After three hours of miserably following the rythm and two close calls to hit the floor again you lie on the floor completely tired. But maybe a little more peaceful, then Macy's figure came inside and blocked the light before giving you a hand to stan up.

"The four year olds keep giving you a hard time?" She asked once you were on your feet.

"No, I actually cancel class today, I forgot to tell you" You said and pointed at your head "I suffered a minor accident last night"

"And why are you doing this then?" She pointed at your clothes and then the record player "The last time you did that was because you were stressed out about your grandma having her hysterectomy"

You let go a tired sigh and not quite sure why start telling her the whole story, about how things were bad with Alan, about the feelings you had for Barry about how you weren't sure if you were doing something wrong, and she sit there with you listen patiently, maybe because at some point you have done the same for her or maybe just to be a decent human being.

"Berkman huh?" She said finally and then smiled at you "I mean I get it, he can't dance to save his life but he is kinda cute. Remember that rich guy who always sent you flowers after class even when he saw Alan coming home every day? He was hot, you should have chosen him" She said and both of you laughed, somehow talking about it that naturally and without judgment does made you feel better.

"Yeah, I remember, but I was too busy with Alan being promoted and the business here growing I didn't have time to that kind of stuff" you said and she gave you a serious look.

"I don't think you have time now either, but that was 3 year ago and you were deeply in love with him, so no other men seem important, he was as forgetful and workaholic as he is now, you just didn't care, and now Barry Berkman is just a clumsy student who is being polite as midwesterners are" She said, and you appreciate her being direct, but it felt wrong to face the facts like that "And you act like he has shaken your marriage like an earthquake, but the truth is that he hasn't. You have to ask yourself, do you like him or do you simply don't love your husband anymore?"

"I love Alan" You said almost too quickly "But I know what you mean, and you are right maybe Barry is just and excuse to project the little stability my husband and I have, but what can I do?" You ask her and she pointed at the door.

"Thinking quickly because the devil is calling" She said since he was opening the door with a lost look on his eyes and holding another board game under his arm.

***

Y/N I have something to tell you Barry keep rehearsing how to bring up the sensitive information, and yet he was dying to avoid the conversation with her.

"Hey there!" Macy and give her the perfect excuse to not say anything, at least not at the moment.

It all started with Sally's invitation to eat after he finished filming for the day, he pretended Y/N text didn't exist to avoid thinking about her, but he finally give in and spend the rest of the session smiling like a child, thinking about how much he was waiting for 5:00 to meet her again, he even went to a toy store to bought a The office Clue special edition since she had said she love that show, obviously just as a get well present, he said to himself.

He drove to the restaurant, and inside there were already Sally and her friend Monique from the movie she was filming, and he asume her boyfriend, a handsome man in a suit and he looked vaguely familiar but he couldn't place from where.

"Babe you made it!" Sally said happy and gave him a quick kiss making room in the booth for him to sit. "We were about to order without you." She said and then pointed at her friend, "You remember Monique, and this is her boyfriend Alan, he is a commercial lawyer, and works for a big company" She said and the man extended his hand with a incredibly white smile.

And he could see briefly see a discolored line where a wedding band should be, and he remembered that same smile in a wedding picture he had been seeing with guilt that morning.

"Boyfriend? So you are not married?" He said without thinking and the man laughed nervously

"Barry!" Sally said and gave him a playfully look meaning shut up.

"Oh I'm sorry, but you have been talking so much about Monique and how great she is I assume she was already taken" He lied, but the woman felt delighted.

"Oh is too soon to talk about that, we have been dating for, how much sweety? A year? More or less?" She said and Barry smiled trying to pretend he was not hearing any of that.

"Yeah, like a year" He said politely "We should order, I'm starving"

"Oh yeah, honey, he was telling us how he just came back from Dallas, making a big merge with an oil company" Sally said completely unaware of how Barry's fists were clenched on his lap wanting to blow up the smile from that man's face.

The worst part was that he was charming and polite, and a total gentleman with the woman, making the idea of Y/N alone at home waiting for him the more infuriating, after the meal he and Monique left together so Barry had to drive Sally home.

"They were nice right?" She said once they were on the road "I mean she is amazing but they together are really nice people"

"Well..." He started not sure of what he should said "He is fine for her, I mean he was a bit pretentious"

"I mean yeah, but you know he is a very busy and important guy, anyway how was your day? When are you going to let me go with you to one of your classes?" She asked genuinely interested.

"Oh you don't really want to go, I'm still not ready, but it was a good day at the studio, we are almost done" He said and then unable to still silent he ask "Hey if you knew that someone is cheating someone close to you, would you tell them? Or would you prefer to never know?"

"OMG who is cheating?" She asked opening her eyes widely "Jermaine is cheating on Natalie? I knew they wouldn't last" She said putting both of her hands on her face "She is going to be crushed"

"What? No!! I mean I don't know, last time they were fine, is more like an hypothetical question" He said now concerned that maybe Jermaine was in fact cheating on Natalie.

"I don't know, I mean if this person doesn't tell me may be to protect me" She started, after a long pause "But if they are my friends and they didn't tell me I would feel betrayed for them letting me be a fool for so long while someone is making fun of me, on the other hand what if it's a just one time thing and we are having a happy relationship and this only ruined it? I would blame my friends, but how could we be happy if the guy is cheating?? No definitely I would rather know" She said and then gave him a concerned look at Barry "are you sure you are okay?"

"Yeah, totally fine, hey do you wanna go to the movies? I can skip class today" He said with a tight knot on his throat finding a way to avoid Y/N.

"Oh I will love to , but I have a lot of lines to read and prepare for tomorrow" She said and he simply drove her home to later return at the dance studio. Thinking about how will he deliver such terrible news to her friend and that they might not be friends at all after he did.

"Is that The Office special edition of clue?" She asked excited once he was close, getting him out of his thoughts

"Yeah, it is" Barry responded giving her the box "How is your head?"

"Better, I'm just concerned about the hair, are you ready to loose some money?" She smile at him, and he returned the smile, both ignoring Macy rolling her eyes.

"I wanna play too" She said "The more the merrier right? Let's go I wanna take your money"

Things work out better than he expected since Macy's presence was distracting enough so he forgot what he was supposed to tell her, but after a couple hours and a few beers she left, leaving the two of them in an awkward silence.

"How was your day?" She break the silence first picking up the games while he help her clean te table.

"It was fun, after I left I had to make a few errands" He lied "And I was late to shooting, so Andre scream at me, is weird since he is about 1 foot shorter than me, but the movie is going great"

"Maybe he feels threatened by a handsome actor who can dance, and what was the other thing? Speak fluent Italian?" She laughed and he had to stop his mind to fantasize about how this was the perfect domestic life he wanted with her.

"And French" he smirked "I should've put Russian, you could have taught me that two" He said and the smile she gave him completely trusting remind him that he had something else to say. But then a ring went off in the other room and she run to answer.

"No it's okay, yeah I get it, say hi to Tom and Claudia for me ok? We can celebrate tomorrow" She said on the phone and then she hung up violently.

"Everything okay?" He said approaching cautiously.

"Yeah, Alan is working late, and he is going to spend the night with a partner of his firm, apparently they have some issues that were not completely solved in Dallas" She said looking at the floor.

"So he is already in LA?" Barry asked and his curiosity took her by surprise.

"Yeah, he came back in the morning, but he had to leave in a rush in the afternoon" She said and then look at the clock "You know what? Let's go out, let's get drunk, I haven't left the house since last night and honestly I'm perfectly fine"

And before he could argue with her she was already in her room changing to a pair of jeans and a bright blouse, while he keep thinking about the right way to tell her, but apparently that would have to wait, since at the moment she was concerned in putting the most possible amount of alcohol in her system.

"You shouldn't do this" He tried to convince her one last time without success.

"Come on, there is a bar around the corner, I can come back home walking, you either come with me or I'll go alone, what do you say?" She had an special talent to make him say yes and he could only follow her.

"Fine, but just a couple drinks ok?" He said finally walking behind her.

"You wanna do shots?" She said after she have drink three glasses of wine while he was still on the first one.

"Not really" he said.

"Hey gorgeous, 4 shots of my friend Jose" She call the bartender who gave him a judging look at him before serving them. "Ok, let's do this" She said and he look down at the shot glass "No, no, you have to look at me or it doesn't count" she said taking his face on her hand, and that spontaneous touch and intimate look that she gave him was enough for him to loose his mind and drink the burning and delicious liquid without any hesitation.

Two became four and by the sixth round the bartender simply let the bottle and they were more than happy to finish it. He no longer care about what he knew about his moron rich husband, all he care was that she wanted to dance and now he finally feel like he knew how.

They walk together, back to the studio, not caring to walk straight, and with no respect for personal space since they were holding on each other shamelessly.

Once inside she put his rehearsing piece on the record player and before she finish taking of her shoes he took her by the waist, more personal and closer than ever, they move roughly at first but after a few minutes he was following the music perfectly l, with his eyes never leaving hers.

"Well that's the secret" she said once the song was about to end "We should get you drunk before your big scene" The son ended but he did let go of her nor she set his hand free.

"I think is more about the partner" He said pressing her more to his chest.

"Well sadly they want young and beautiful actresses, even they have terrible technique" she said quietly.

"You are young and beautiful" he lowered his face to be a few inches from her mouth.

"I'm also married Barry" She answered, without any will to walk away and move herself closer to him.

"I don't care"

Tag list:

@l0ve-0f-my-life

#barry hbo #barry berkman edit #barry fanfiction #barry berkman fanfiction #barry berkman x you #barry berkman x reader #barry block #barry berkman #bill hader fanfiction #bill hader kiss #bill hader #tango #romance #cheating #drinking #cheap tequila

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soft-foxxay · 5 years

Text

Neglectful • foxxay

Lately, Cordelia had been putting more effort on her position as supreme than anything else, including her relationship with Misty. And lately, Misty had been feeling way too lonely that she started to think that Cordelia is neglecting their relationship on purpose. They barely have little night conversations that usually don't happen because Cordelia is often too tired.

That night wasn't much different, Cordelia was out to manage some stuff leaving Misty alone to deal with her loneliness. Misty was trying to get herself busy with some plants at the greenhouse before she started suffocating with her own overthinking. The tears threatened her eyes and she felt her explosion approaching, so she let go of what she was doing and decided to go back inside and drown all the useless thoughts with sleep.

As she got in, she caught the sight of Zoe and Madison chattering in the hall, more like lowly arguing, with the fireplace dimly illuminating the white walls. She tried to make her steps unheard as she made her way upstairs, avoiding any kind of contact with the other witches.

She turned the light off as soon as she entered the room, letting the room drown into the darkness, as if she was afraid invisible creatures would see her tears if they fell. She buried herself beneath the covers and gave sleep a way into her, but sleep wasn't there to come.

This was even more torturing to her, to lay awake in bed, surrounded but the emptiness of the room and struggling with her demons that started to swallow her alive.

In that meantime, Cordelia shut the door behind her as she got into the big white mansion, her eyes scanning the place on hope to find Misty somewhere around, but instead all she could find was the two girls disagreeing with each other as usual.

"Where's Misty?" The supreme questioned, a serious tone of concern adoring her voice. Her voice made the two girls lift their heads up towards her.

"How am I supposed to know? My girlfriend or yours?" Madison hurried to answer, clearly showing her annoyance.

Cordelia let the sigh drift out of her lips at Madison's unhelpful answer, and decided to go look Misty by herself. Guilt was running in her veins and burning her up on the inside, she wished that she had spent more time with Misty, not only because she knew that Misty was probably upset now, but also because she missed her so much. She missed everything about her one true love.

She was met by the darkness of the room once she stepped in. Unlike every night, Misty wasn't waiting for her, which grew heartache in her at some point. She took off her shoes and every cloth that covered her body except her underwear and bra before she lied in bed with her arms wrapped around Misty's still waist.

"I don't wanna talk to ya." Misty uttered, which caused the other woman to let go of her much needed sleep and pour her attention on Misty.

"Why is that, love?" Cordelia let her voice fill the room as she planted a bunch of gentle kisses of Misty's bare shoulder.

"Ya know why." The swamp witch tried to suppress the tears within her eyes, but seemingly all her attempts fell off a cliff when her cheeks got damp with tears.

Cordelia did know, by rewinding everything that happened between them through the previous week she came to realize she was pretty neglectful, in a painful way. Her eyes were opened to the fact that she'd been treating Misty like any normal witch in her coven more than a girlfriend. And by that time she came to understand why Misty was upset, she had the right to be.

"I'm sorry I-" She tried to speak, but not even apologizing could wipe away the guilt she felt. How did she not realize before, how did she not see how hurt her lover was, because of her.

"Yeah sure." Misty immediately replied, cutting off Cordelia. The pain her voice added more onto Cordelia, crushing her heart into dust.

She pulled Misty even closer, nuzzling her head into her neck. She filled her senses with Misty's scent like a needed medicine. In one moment she felt like her tears were about to burst out of her eyes in a way she wouldn't resist, but she knew she had to stop herself.

"I'm so sorry, baby. Listen, I know I've been- a big great pain in the ass and I'm not saying I'm not the one to blame, I was wrong for being so damn neglectful. But hey, maybe we can make up now? I was already planning for something for us tonight but to find out that you've already went to bed ruined it, but we're good, okay?" The supreme spoke, in a gentle voice tone that was a little shaky, brushing away a hair lock that blocked the view of Misty's face.

"It doesn't matter, we make up tonight but as you wake, you're no different." Painfully, Misty replied, stabbing a thousand knives right into Cordelia's heart.

"At this point, you're wrong. I just don't want you ever think that all this neglect we've been going through is intended or anything, it's just a tough while we're going through and it will be washed away, from now." She gently whispered into Misty's ear ever so lowly as if she feared someone from outside the walls would hear. She pressed her lips softly on her lover's cheek in a soothing manner, tasting the slight taste of salt the tears left behind.

"We're good, aren't we?" In more like a worried voice Cordelia asked, her heart started beating with concern and her mind made images of what she feared most when she got nothing from Misty as a reply.

In that very moment, as if Misty could tell how concerned Cordelia was, she turned towards the supreme, face to face with her lover as she planned on exposing what was in her heart like an open book.

"I - I was just too scared you don't want me anymore, you don't want us. That thought got me losin' my shit. I - I don't wanna lose you, Delia." She bit on her inner cheek in hard attempts to gather the tears inside her eyes, to make her voice come out as strong as she desired, but before she could even tell, she broke down in tears and became a raging mess of sobs, like a fragile piece of glass shattering in between Cordelia's arms.

"Hell, no no no! This is not happening, erase this thought off your head!" Cordelia tightened her grip on Misty, as if she was trying to keep her together, to keep her from falling apart. She wiped as many tears as she could with the palm of her hand but Misty's tears couldn't seem to stop.

Cordelia tilted the swamp witch's head up a little so she could see the sparkles in her eyes with more of the clearance. Fireworks started lighting up her chest the moment she looked at Misty's eyes, realizing all over again how beautiful everything in her was, in the same time realizing how much of an asshole she was to not care much for such an angel.

She tangled their lower limps together in the form of a cuddle, and wrapped her arms tight around Misty's waist as if to keep her close forever. Only then, Misty's tears stopped flowing like a river out of her eyes, and there was finally an end limit to her sobs that seemed endless a moment ago.

"I want you to be with me forever, no force in the world could ever tear us apart, and that's the only thing I know for certain. I wanna spend every moment I have left with you because during this time I was distant I figured out how fucked I'd be if you ever wanted to let go of me." She smoothly said, more like a whisper, while running her fingers through Misty's wild mess of golden curls.

"You are more like the oxygen I breathe, maybe even more important, more like the light to my eyes. Your existence in my life is an actual necessity, quite simply. If I didn't have you I'd sure be lost, lacking love and maybe even life." She continued her business of brushing Misty's mess of a hair as she spoke.

"I - I love you, like so much." She heard Misty whisper back at her, her voice sounded faint and ever so fragile, lovely in all definitions. With this statement, she was finally feeling the peace of mind, knowing that everything will be just fine even before the sun of the morning shows itself.

"I love you, oh well I adore you. I need you, most of the time it just gets difficult to live knowing that you're not around. I want you, forever." As she spoke, she seemed to be drifting away in her own fantasies and wild imaginations.

Her index finger escaped her control and went under Misty's chin in order to tilt her head up enough for Cordelia to look at her straight in the eyes. Once Cordelia's eyes met Misty's she saw glimmers of hope and love adorning the ocean blue eyes, she saw an entire galaxy of stars roaming in her eyes, beautifully. A hint of a smile lit up the once sad face, giving it a whole different kind of perfect.

Every part of her disobeyed, every part of her ran away from her control, and this effect became significant on her when her lips hovered over Misty's, hesitant to make the move until an urge in her crashed her lips against the petal soft lips of Misty in a gentle kiss that worked absorbing all their discomfort, all troubles away, throwing all to the ocean as if it had never been.

The kiss grew more passionate, more heartfelt when they both needed such thing a long while ago to regain their vitality. Cordelia took Misty's lips in hers ever so gladly, letting her silently know that she'd go to the ends of the Earth to get this kiss if she had to,and on the other hand, Misty kissed back quite soulfully to complete their passionate action.

Seconds after, their lips parted, still leaving a sweet effect on each other. Misty's head rested comfortably on Cordelia's chest, with Cordelia's arms already wrapping around her and running her fingers through her hair. They went back to the state of peace they wished to return to, and finally, the quietness after the storm was theirs to claim.

"I will be with till my last dying breath, and that's my promise."

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bnha-hcs · 5 years

Note

*breathes* I've been haunted by the "wait for me" trope; may I ask for a scenario where Todoroki's crush accidentally slips that she loves him, but he doesn't catch it and she leaves it hoping he doesn't think too much about it. But he does. And he realizes. So he brings her to talk and feelings are exchanged; he admits he loves her back but he's got a lot going on but he doesn't want to lose her, so if she's willing, would she wait for him? I'm really sorry if that's a lot to ask!

Decided to do some requests bc I’m still waiting on my doctors to figure shit out and its,,, taking forever so I’m running out of things to do that don’t have me doing too much alsjdalkd. I know it’s late on a lot of these but better late than never yeah?

Also I finally caught up with the manga oh my gods it’s been 5000 years

- Tiki

You stand there in complete silence- thoroughly mortified about what you had just let slip in such casual conversation. There’s no telling what could happen at this point and you weren’t sure if you should try to apologize or just own up to the fact that you had just accidentally confessed your feelings to Todoroki. For a second you weren’t even sure if he even heard you, until you looked over and saw his blue and brown eyes searching your face for any semblance- any indication that you had been lying, or joking, or something.

Todoroki didn’t look like he was going to say anything anytime soon, leaving you to hurry up and pick a course of action. He looks… uncomfortable, and actually a little flustered. Specifically, he even looks like he’s lost a bit of his cool/aloof nature and you’re very afraid you’ve actually ruined any sort of friendship the two of you even had. Is he mad?? Is he upset with you?? You scramble to think of what to say, and before you can stop yourself, words are pouring out of your mouth in a mad dash to keep whatever dignity and friendship you had left.

“Um!! I mean don’t think anything of what I just said… In fact, just forget I said anything alright??” You manage out, stumbling over a few words here and there.

NO response.

Crap, you’ve definitely fucked up. Surely this is where everything goes out the window and now it’s time to make a hasty retreat. So you scramble to get your things and get going, making your move to leave. As soon as you bid your quick goodbye in the form of a quiet squeak you feel the hold of his hand on your wrist, and look to see a look of utter confusion on his face matched with pleading eyes. You’ve never seen such a look on Todoroki’s face before and you’re unsure of what to even make of it. Out of habit you freeze and wait for whatever he looks like he’s about to say.

“I’m sorry, what did you mean? I’m a little confused…” He says, his face scrunching up a little bit as he looks lost in thought. You physically deflate at his words.

Oh GOOD he doesn’t actually know what you said thank g o d s. You let out a large sigh and force a sheepish smile onto your face, freeing your wrist from his grasp and waving your hand a bit.

“It’s okay Shouto! Don’t worry about it.” You say quickly, taking a step away. “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

This time you don’t give him any room you stop you, and successfully make your retreat this time. You almost run back to the dorms, eager to find solace in the safety of your room and to wallow in your embarrassment by yourself, and rightfully so. You were still mortified with yourself, and are sure you wouldn’t be able to look Todoroki in the eyes the next few days. Gods... maybe if you were lucky he’d just forget about the whole thing altogether. But you’d never be that lucky. Todoroki was aloof but you were dead sure he wasn’t that aloof.

As soon as you were back to your dorm room you threw yourself on the bed and contemplated on whether you needed to fake your own death or not. Your over dramatic ass tried to list off friends who could possibly help you disappear, but figured you’d have a better chance just accepting what happened than trying to suddenly drop from the grid and become a hermit. Groaning into your pillow you roll over and set your alarms for tomorrow, deciding to sleep off your days events.

------

The alarms went off and you had to, unfortunately, get up and get ready to face the day. As soon as you brought your phone to your face and shut off the alarms to stop the assault on your poor eardrums, you found a text from Todoroki waiting for you, having been sent only a few minutes before you got up. As soon as you saw it waiting in your messages you could feel your soul leaving your body and the emergency systems in your brain start to malfunction. At some point you were sure someone could hear you screaming in your mind as you tapped on the message to read its contents.

‘Sorry it’s early, but could we talk before class?’

Quickly, you texted out a reply, making about 500 typos and then having to spend more time fixing them than actually typing it up. It didn’t help that you were hardly coherent from waking up about 2 minutes prior. Finally you had hit send and waited for a reply, biting your lip a little too hard.

‘Sure!! Same place as yesterday?’

…

‘That’s fine’

You practically shoot yourself out of bed to get dressed and make yourself look like you didn’t just sleep for about 15 hours because holy hell you were sure you looked like a disaster right now. I mean… you ARE a disaster, but you couldn’t let anyone actually k n o w, let alone Todoroki of all people good gods. So you shove on your uniform and haphazardly brush through your hair so you could quickly jump over to the bathroom and brush your teeth, put on deodorant, etc.

As you’re finishing up your flurry of things you realize you hadn’t asked when the hell you were supposed to be there, having just assumed that he meant as soon as possible. Well… if you went now you wouldn’t have to run the risk of running into anyone. So instead of confirming a time to be there, you decided to stick to your plan of getting there as soon as possible, not exactly caring if it was a little too early. Maybe you could find a vending machine somewhere and get a drink in case you had to wait…

You sighed and threw your bag over your shoulder, checking your phone as you exit your room and make your way down, and out of the dorms. Just as you had thought, not many people were up and you were lucky enough to slip past them and out the door without having to say a thing. Maybe they were also half asleep and just hadn’t the energy to talk yet. Either way you were grateful. With a quick pace you headed back to where you were yesterday- a small courtyard around the school grounds that you’d often study at if the weather permitted. After a while of being friends with Todoroki, the two of you had made it a habit to meet there and study together or just hang out between other things in your busy lives.

Rounding the corner you choked on your spit seeing Todoroki was already there, and you had to make peace with dying from choking as you avoided hacking up a lung and looking like a huge idiot. Just great… Your face was already red and your voice was going to sound stressed. And he must’ve heard your muffled choking noises because he turned around, his soft face catching the morning sun as he squinted to see you. So you hurried your way over for his sake, seeing as it would do neither of you any good if you just loafed around like a piece of wet lettuce.

“Um, hey!” You squeaked out, stopped just a bit in front of him. “So what did you want to talk about?”

There’s a pause, and you watch him shift his hands, like he isn’t sure what or where to put them. He settles for awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck, a blush dusting his cheeks as he struggles to look at you. You watch with much anxiety and anticipation, not used to… well… any of this.

“I realized what exactly you meant yesterday…” He starts, choosing his words carefully. “And I’m sorry I didn’t understand at first but…”

But??? But what?? Oh gods you knew it, you knew he was going to reject you- you knew you never stood a chance of ever being with someone like him. You knew… you’d start to cry sooner or later but as soon as you had the flood of thoughts scrambling for purchase through your head you could feel the tears pricking your eyes and the heaviness of rejection settling in your head.

“I’m not really good at… these kind of things.” He says simply, and part of you is relieved but you aren’t exactly sure that can stop steeling yourself for whatever he has to say. He looks up at you, eyes locking with yours, his gaze as heavy as your head felt and you find your breath catching in your throat. He sighs, looking away again before he begins to inch closer.

Todoroki reaches out and you resist the urge to shy away, knowing that if you did, you’d never be able to witness such tenderness from him again. So you move a bit closer on your own and meet him halfway. His right hand moves to cup the side of you face, thumb swiping over your cheek with a feeling that has you at a loss of words. You’re not even sure if you should speak right now, and wait for him to make his next move. Todoroki has a look of pure adoration of you in his eyes and you feel his hand waver a bit and a slight look of sadness flickers in his eyes for a quick second.

“I realized what you said and then I realized I…” He pauses his other hand going to cup the other side of your face, “I love you, too.”

The feeling is suffocating- his hands, his words, his face as it’s so close and so far from yours, and then the feeling in the pit of your stomach that has you thinking that it’s too good to be true. The warm blush that’s spread across your face has you feeling dizzy, like you can’t quite focus on anything but his touch, and the sound of his voice. You sigh prematurely and you watch him look away for a second.

“Shouto…” You breathe out.

“I love you so much, (Y/N), but I- we can’t be together right now.”

“Wh.. What?” You ask incredulously. “What do you mean?”

You can feel the tears pricking in your eyes again, and the sinking of your stomach as a pang grabs at the deepest depths of your chest. You could hardly keep your voice from wavering as you spoke. He can tell you’re upset, and surely this was just as hard for him to explain as it was for you to listen and accept it.

“Just, as I am now, I wouldn’t be able to be there for you. And we’re both still changing and growing so it wouldn’t be good for either of us.” He sighs, looking around like he’s anxious until he resumes, keeping his tender gaze with you and his hands still gently holding your face. “But I don’t want to lose you.”

It’s hard to keep the feelings buried in you so you let a sniffle out, and few tears roll down your face, which are quickly wiped away by the boy in front of you. You want so hard to hide your face- to bury it in your hands and hide the tears you’ve been trying so hard to keep back, but all you can do is reach up and grasp one the the hands Todoroki has cupping your face. You lean into his touch, nodding to his words as they slowly process in your mind.

“(Y/n),” He beckons your name so you’ll look up at him, giving you a small smile. “I know I’m asking a lot but, will you wait for me?”

It takes you a second to actually process any single word that he just said and you half blame the inebriated state that you’ve been in this whole time and the whirlwind of emotions that you’ve been through had you second guessing your comprehensive skills. And before he knew it, you had broken his hold on you and leapt into his arms, burying your face in whatever place you could put it. His arms circle around you and for a few moments the two of your stand there, completely content in each other’s presence. His face buries itself in your hair and he places a small kiss on the top of your head.

“Of course I’ll wait for you!” You gasp, pulling your head from his chest and making him lift his head. “I’ll wait as long as it takes.”

For a second he looks surprised as he looks down at you, like he didn’t expect you to say yes. And then a smile makes its way into his face, slowly, and he can’t help showing his delight. Without much warning he leans down and quickly presses his lips against yours. It’s quick, and in a way it’s very bitter sweet as you quickly go to reciprocate the affection, knowing full well it’ll be the last you’ll ever get in a while. You try to embed into your mind the feeling of his lips on yours, and you know very well that he is probably doing just the same. The tickling shiver that flutters up your spine is foreign, but definitely not unwelcome and part of you wonders when you’ll be able to indulge in something like this everyday. And just as you thought, the moment the two of you part, you feel a loss at the lack of contact.

You feel Todoroki’s breath fan across your face and resist the urge to lean back in for another kiss. And so the two of you part further, going back to standing together, and somehow acting like that didn’t just happen. You share a look with him and with a nod the two of you head off to class, Todoroki looking like he’s puffed up a little, probably due to the fact that he didn’t think you’d say yes. You found it endearing, to say the least.

There’s nothing much to say as you walk, a comfortable silence, and you find yourself still a little confused in your feelings. Sure you’re still muddled in sadness at the fact that were both rejected and not rejected at the same time. You weren’t quite sure where to place anything in your heart just yet. The only thing you knew is that you’d have to wait for him, for however long it takes. And you were just fine with that.

#bnha imagines #bnha #bnha scenarios #todoroki shouto #mha imagines #this took me too damn long to write #I literally had no time to finish it until just now #Anonymous

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purecamp · 5 years

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Hi, I have a question about your mamma mia au! Is Pat dead on Here I Go Again? Because I was thinking that if she passed away before higa, Sharon and Willam would attend the funeral right? Wouldn't Sharon bring Trixie too? Wouldn't Willam go talk to her and get suspicious about Trixie? Is this me subtly asking you to write an oneshot about it just because I'm not ready to let go of this universe and also wanting you to write more Shillam? 😂

ahaha anon this tickled me tbh. first of all thanks for the love (!!!), so i’ll try to answer in parts

-unfortunately she has passed before higa because she would be 113, which is possible but... unlikely ahaha -ive been debating this since waaaay before u asked me bc its something i thought about a lot, like would sharon bring trixie or not? would she even go? lots 2 think about, decisions decisions -i would write oneshots for you in a second. plz feel free to request them at any time omg

anyway, i guess i’m gonna give it a go here!

She was a good age, Sharon knew that. Spritely in nature right up until her last moments, Patricia Belli passed away in her retirement home at the age of ninety six.

Her letter had arrived in the post; a short and not-so-sweet note letting Sharon know that if she received this letter, then she had died, and the nursing home staff had actually honoured her request of them to send it to her. Somewhat of a doting grandma - owing to the fact that Sharon had no idea what Pat would be to Trixie if she even was related - she had attached some plastic-wrapped sweets and lollipops.

God, this was going to be difficult. On top of having to close the hotel, at least for a day whilst she attended the funeral, Sharon was going to have to explain the concept of dying to her three-year-old girl, who thought the world was nothing but sparkles and sunshine.

And that was without slotting in time for her own grief. In four years, Pat had transformed Sharon’s life, and she owed her everything.

Times like these were when Sharon wished she had a little bit of help. She needed to cry and sniff and weep into somebody, to wallow in the horrible feeling of finally being alone in the world with herself as the only adult to rely on. She needed to continue working in order to stay alive, and keep her home paid for and her daughter fed. She needed to sit down and explain to Trixie than Nana Pat was gone, and she wouldn’t be coming back. She needed someone else to bundle her up for once and tell her it was all going to be okay.

“You alright?” Maria broke her out of her thoughts, tapping her as she went past behind the bar to fetch a few more bottles of ale.

Sharon grabbed a rag and continued drying up the glasses - Maria had offered to extend the hotel into her bar, meaning Sharon now managed a hotel and taverna in one. “Yeah, just... Can’t believe she’s gone, you know? I always felt like Pat was gonna live forever.”

Maria nodded. “It will be strange, we miss her around here. She was regular for many years at this taverna. Party held here after the service, in her honour.”

“She’d like that. Everyone getting drunk for her.” She sighed, her eyes filling with tears. “I don’t want to have to tell Trix. She’s only young, after all.”

Shrugging, Maria offered a kindly smile. “Brave and strong, like her mother. Even if teeny tiny.”

Despite her heavy heart, Sharon laughed.

---

“Mama! You’re here!”

The same cheerful greeting that Sharon was met with every afternoon came at her once again, lifting her low mood a little. A flurry of pink shot towards her, Sharon noting a smudge of blue paint on her face and some scuffs on her shoes from a day of playing before she was tackled in a huge hug.

“I’m here, little pumpkin. Did you have a good day?”

“The best!” Trixie trilled. “We did painting, and running, and I played dolls with Kimmy and Pearl showed me how to draw hearts!”

Ever-suffering, her preschool teacher was stood by the door to the classroom, her gaze tired but still warm as her last student clung to her mom. It wasn’t too often that Sharon was last to pick up her little girl, but it happened enough that she knew to just sit Trixie down with some colouring and leave her to it. Today, the grief had slowed Sharon down, and she was behind on most of her maintenance.

“Sounds fun! Now, are we walking out of here or is mama carrying you all the way home?”

Trixie took a moment to think about it, before smushing her face into Sharon’s neck. “Mama carries me home.”

Sharon sighed, figuring that she needed to keep Trixie happy if she was going to deliver such bad news. “Okay, just this once. Say bye bye, now!”

“Bye bye, Miss Coulée!”

Just Sharon’s luck, the walk was roughly long enough for them to discuss the subject. She was careful not to let her own emotions influence Trixie’s too much, knowing that a sobbing little girl would be much harder to console when she herself wanted nothing more than to break down in someone’s arms. Curious and a little confused, she asked a few questions which Sharon tried her best to answer, all while avoiding the term “Heaven”. It felt like she’d done an okay job, all things considered, but the fact that she had to do it alone meant she was more than nervous. This wasn’t going to traumatise her into therapy as an adult... she hoped.

“Will she miss me?”

Fuck, this kid was tugging at every single one of Sharon’s heartstrings. It didn’t seem possible that she had been the one to give life to something so goddamn cute.

“Nana Pat? I’m sure she will miss you, baby. And we’ll miss her, too.” Sharon took a deep breath. “But she’s still with us, isn’t she? Because we remember her, and we always have our memories.”

Trixie nodded thoughtfully. She had begged and begged to sit on Sharon’s shoulders, so now she idly played with loose strands of her hair, the messy bun practically ruined from the day’s work anyway.

“But she won’t come back because she’s too old.”

The child-like ability to make the most innocent and heartbreaking of things funny was one that Sharon hoped Trixie held onto forever. Even with her own heavy sadness, she giggled slightly.

“That’s right, bubba.”

A pause. “Are you sad, mama?”

Sharon nodded infinitesimally, trying not to trigger her tears. “Lots of people will be sad. When we go to the funeral on Saturday, there will be lots of sad people wearing black who all love Nana Pat very much. Will you promise me to be a really good girl and just sit quietly with me? We don’t want to disturb anyone.”

Trixie leaned forwards, pressing her lips to the top of Sharon’s head in an awkward, well-meaning kiss. “I’ll be good.”

---

She was golden. Sharon had done all her crying in the morning, before Trixie scrambled into her bed, and she was relieved at how easily her toddler had gone along with everything. Getting herself dressed had been a breeze; she even tried brushing her own hair, which was unsuccessful but nevertheless touching. Trixie then scampered off to play whilst Sharon got ready, giving her a few more moments alone.

Smoothing down her skirt, she examined herself in the mirror. An uncomfortable possibility had dawned on her that night, as she tried to sleep, and it made her unbelievably nervous. After all, he was her great-nephew...

She didn’t look that different than the day they met, surely? But yet, staring at herself, Sharon started realizing how little she resembled that girl already. Only four years had passed, near enough, and at twenty one and a mom, there was almost nothing to anchor this version of herself to the similarly-burdened yet unrealistically carefree seventeen-year-old that Willam had known.

Her hips were wider now, one of the few permanent modifications that Trixie had given her, and for all her low income meant a reduced diet, there was still the remains of a post-baby pouch that stubbornly remained. Black dresses were slimming, Sharon reminded herself, not that the rest of her needed it, but she hoped it was enough that if Willam did see her, he wouldn’t notice anything different.

That being said, he was a man. The little things didn’t matter. The living, squirming three-year-old, however...

Sharon sighed and relaxed, not bothering to try and suck in her stomach like she had before. Willam definitely wouldn’t notice it, he’d be too busy staring at Trixie. The human that he might’ve helped her create. That she had opted not to tell him about. Even though she had an easy way to do so via his now deceased great-aunt.

Fuck.

They made their way up to the little old chapel on the island in good time. Pat knew and loved her home more than anything, so relatives had been flocking from around the world to a tiny chapel on a tiny island out in Greece. It was a difficult walk, and with every step Sharon had to face that she really was in this alone now.

Not wanting to intrude in spite of her invite, Sharon slipped into a pew at the back and bowed her head, clutching Trixie in her lap as more of a comfort than anything else. Thankfully, as more and more people filed in, Trixie seemed to sense that her mama was upset, and quietly played with her flamingo teddy.

He was one of the last to walk in, of course - he would have to make an entrance. Swaggering in, his expression mostly calm, and his sheer confidence was highly inappropriate for a funeral and god if Sharon didn’t sound like her fucking mother. He was young and hot and the swagger seemed to be a Belli thing, because no one paid him any attention. Somewhere, whether in heaven or in her coffin, Sharon knew Pat was cackling with laughter.

And, of course, he just had to speak too. Sharon lifted her head a tiny bit to watch him, trying to ensure his gaze didn’t flicker onto her.

“So many kind things have been said about my dear great aunt today, and whilst it has warmed my heart I’m here to undo it all.” Willam started, filling the room with soft laughter. “Rest in peace, Granny Pat. You were old as fuck, but we’ll miss your rottenness. She had an ego bigger than mine and a liver bigger than Dad’s, and she was the life of the party. We love you, Pat.”

Everything about him was so familiar. Sharon tried not to think about it, but her mind was flooded with him. He didn’t look different at all, but she supposed LA had treated him well. Tanned and charming as ever, he seemed to woo his family as easily as he had seduced her into bed with him... or at least, that was how Sharon chose to remember it.

This was going to be a long day.

---

In all honesty, Sharon didn’t go out much anymore. It came with the territory of being a full-time parent and hotel owner-manager-chef-bartender-maid, but she was tired almost all the time. When Raja and Jinkx came over she made exceptions, but on a day-to-day basis, once Trixie was in bed, Sharon was exhausted from exerting herself to make sure she could even be finished and home in time for Trixie’s bedtime story. So, being out in the taverna in the late evening?

Unbearable.

As soon as everyone came in, Maria offered to take Trixie and keep her entertained behind the bar - which probably wasn’t the most responsible choice Sharon had made as a mom, but she knew Maria would take good care of her as she always did, and insisted she needed to mingle.

Mingling was the last thing on her mind, but she reluctantly grabbed a drink and tried to remain casual in a room full of strangers. After all, none of them knew who she was. None of them knew what Pat meant to her, and everything the daft old woman had done for her. None of them knew that without Pat, it was likely that her beloved daughter would’ve been given up for adoption and Sharon would’ve had to return home to her mother with her tail between her legs. Pat had made it possible for her to live, and as rough as it was, it was nice to be self-sufficient at twenty one.

“Hey! I thought it was you! Hi blondie!”

Sharon clutched her glass a little tighter and turned around slowly. “Forgot my name already?”

There he was, right next to her, having made his way across the room with bright eyes and a shiny grin. LA really had treated him well.

“You’re unforgettable, Sharon, don’t play me like that.” Willam teased. “Good to see you again. I knew goodbye wouldn’t last forever.”

Sharon scowled, but it didn’t last. “Hence why I said we wouldn’t have one.”

“Good point.” He gestured to her glass. “Vodka?”

She shook her head. “Just coke.”

“Pffft. Boring. Pat would want you to have some vodka. Or gin. Or both.”

Rolling her eyes, Sharon took a sip from her decidedly non-alcoholic drink. “I have responsibilities to take care of, I can’t just get drunk.”

As she spoke, her gaze went searching through the throng of people, praying Trixie wasn’t about to run over and squeeze her legs in a damning cuddle. To her relief, she was that she was balanced on Maria’s hip, happily giggling away with her out of Willam’s eyeline.

“We’re twenty one, Shar, and you haven’t seen me forever. Live a little!” Willam encouraged. “Seriously though, it’s good to see you. I didn’t know if you would still be here or if you still saw Pat around. It’s nice to see a face that I know she’d be happy to see, too. She hated most of the people here.”

God, the past tense. Sharon tried not to well up.

“You’re the only face here I know.” She admitted, her voice thick. “I feel a bit lost, honestly. If I didn’t have work, I’d be doing shots to loosen up.”

Willam laughed at that. “Right! I’m glad you know my face, at least. Familiar face, familiar arms, familiar chest, familiar d-”

“Stop!” Sharon shrieked, giggling in spite of herself. “Your great aunt has just died and you’re talking about our teenage sex? You’re disgusting.”

He shrugged. “I’m a Belli, it runs in the family. All this nonsense about her living to a ripe old age... please. She wasn’t ripe, she was rotten. It’s why we love her so.”

Sharon chuckled appreciatively. “I’m gonna miss her.”

“Me too. She’d be glad to see us brought back together, though.”

“Yeah. Although I’m not gonna sleep with you again.”

Willam’s laugh was a little too loud, attracting some disgruntled murmurs from surrounding family members. “Welp, there goes my weekend plans.”

It was surprisingly nice, talking to Willam. As much as Sharon had been terrified that the first topic of conversation would be them, and it would inevitably lead to a confession, they fell into a fleeting friendship as easily as they had four years ago. Determined to keep things light, Sharon steered away from her work or home life as they talked, but it was still nice to catch up.

That being said, she also kinda never wanted to see him again. Nothing personal, just... for Trixie’s sake, she had closed that chapter of her life and under no circumstances would she be reopening it. Not now, not in twenty years, not ever.

“I assume you’re breaking into stardom in Hollywood, right? I’ll be seeing you on movie posters?”

He laughed. “A star is born, baby. Keep your eyes open. And you, are you taking to the stage now you’re away from your bitch of a mom?”

Sharon shook her head. “Nah. I don’t... I don’t have time anymore. And with the girls gone, too...”

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but you don’t need them. And we should sing together again sometime, too.”

At that, Sharon sighed. “There’s nothing keeping you here, Willam, not now she’s gone. We had fun, but... there’s no point holding onto that. I got over my exes, I have to keep living and so do you.”

Willam nodded. “A goodbye without a goodbye. I get it. It’s difficult, but we have to let go.”

Yeah, Sharon told herself. In more ways than one.

“It’s not a personal thing, you know I care about you as a friend-”

“I know.” Willam told her. “I care about you too. But I get it.”

He pulled her into a hug. “Needles, take care of yourself. You’re skinny, take advantage of the free food. Fall in love. Make music. Do things to make you happy. You deserve that.”

Speechless, Sharon could only nod as he held her. “I can tell you’re ready to leave, so I’ll say goodbye now. You’re a one of a kind, okay? Keep going, angel thighs.”

Pfft. The old parody nickname - trust Willam to remember that.

“Thank you, Willam.”

---

Trixie was fast asleep in Sharon’s arms. Her warm weight had settled comfortably into her as she walked home, and Sharon relished in the way her sweet daughter could fill her aching heart so perfectly. Her blonde curls were messy, just like her own were as a child, and she was completely tuckered out.

Her adorable girl had little outfits, a bedroom of her own and a roof over her head all thanks to the love and kindness of one foul-mouthed, gin-loving lady. As the sun started setting, Sharon realized she owed another Belli a lifetime of gratitude.

“Thank you, Pat.”

#uh maybe this got too long oops #higa #asks #shillam #this shouldve had a read more but they dont work #i tried

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mystery-salad · 5 years

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7, 13, 20 and 22 from the angst questions for all of your characters (cause i'm selfish uwu and want to know /all/ lmao i am so sorry)

Oh my god HOLY SHIT i have THIRTY EIGHT character slots,,,,,,you will get all the ones that are intended to be permanent characters which is 34 of them I hope you’re ready for a long-ass post man cause that’s 136 answers

7. If your character was allowed to murder one person without any consequences, who would it be and why?

Taomesin: They already have killed those they want to, the people they’re meant to fight! Big enemies. They don’t really go killing randomly and wouldn’t see a point.

Nixxte: High-ranking inquest, someone who’s death would completely destabilise the inquest system for a while.

Tirs: Envert. The two have some history.

Mint: No one! They’re perfectly happy and know that Azin will protect them from anyone and anything! Azin is all they need and they would never dream of killing anyone! They already cause enough trouble with all their ptsd.

Bodacc: If she could, whoever is the reason she was abandoned as a baby. She doesn’t know who it was, if her parents are alive or dead. She loves the warband that raised her but she truly regrets not getting to immerse herself in asuran society growing up.

Mango: No one in particular, though probably a childhood rival or two.

Imekaari: Braith. But Cue did that, so anyone else from Lace’s past that hurt them.

Tojoll: Rytlock

Elaphurus: No one! Baby angel is so sweet they just want to help and protect!!!

Aqun: Maric, he’s more than earned it in her eyes.

Tvelle: She’d like to have killed Scarlet herself.

Whomstdve: No one she’s chill

Laighe: Illiadde, the two have some very antagonistic history between them.

Ennreck: He’d certainly like Kralk to Cut That Shit Out

Aezlin: He already gets to do this! If someone bugs him he can just tell Oriphio who will take care of them~

Vellask: She doesn’t have anyone in particular she’d kill. The spores would like to kill everyone if they could though.

Terizzi: They’ve killed those they needed to, now they just want to live alone in peace. They’d run from or kill anyone who’d approach them now if that counts.

Strair: They would go after Faolain, or whoever leads the court now. The court has just caused too many inconveniences to them tbh.

Kvold: He’d kill Affa, Lace’s employee that first ‘rescued’ him from the court. That dude rubs him the wrong way for several reasons.

Embrant: She would’ve killed Kvold after he broke Wrelia for a while.

Rieft: Whoever’s hurt Veirett. She loves her old mentor and wants her to truly be happy.

Illiadde: She already does kill everyone my dude

Cue: He’s already killed the man he hates most, Braith!

Odollumn: She doesn’t care enough about anyone to genuinely want anyone dead of her own motivations.

Regniette: They would take out the idiots who are still trying to follow Joko even though he’s dead.

Nimue: He doesn’t wish death upon anyone

Ezra: An employer or two. She’s hoping one day she’ll get contracts put on them that she can act on too!

Fhariem: Faolain and whoever her successor is, for taking the Court in such a pitiful direction over time.

Envert: Those idiot cowards who kicked her out of the Grove just for being curious about some more interesting experiment ideas. Come on, some bloodshed is necessary for the really good questions!!!

Cherie: He will befriend everyone instead!!!!

Fuilliome: A fellow mercenary who’s taken his jobs and targets a little too personally. It’s just a job man, and you’re inconveniencing him now with your unprofessionalism.

Renee: Half the nobles on earth. If you’ve met one you’ve met them all and they rarely actually aid in saving the world instead of just whining dramatically about it.

Tenor: She already kills those she wants to, though she’d love to get ahold of Lace herself. If only she could get Cue out of the way so she wouldn’t have to worry about dying…

Jioro: Queen Jenna, she has it coming for using sketchy technology to make guards that can be hacked TWICE!!!

13. What does it take to make your character cry?

Taomesin: They have never cried in their life!!! They’re emotionally numb!!!!!!!

Nixxte: Just average stuff, extremely sad moments, losing a loved one, etc…

Tirs: Memories of Envert

Mint: Memories of when they were captured by pirates, the thought that they will never be welcome in the Grove again, the thought that most people would hurt them, Whenever they hurt or disappoint Azin, ptsd flashbacks or relapses.

Bodacc: Whenever she tries to interact with other asuras and usually gets rebuffed for being so unusual

Mango: Average things, sad moments and deaths of loved ones

Imekaari: Friends in pain, that time he was tortured by Lace when they were mordrem, average sad things, he happy cries too if he’s overly happy c:

Tojoll: She will angry cry if something has gone wrong enough, and will be absolutely inconsolable for a while if a loved one dies.

Elaphurus: They cry when scared, which happened a lot when they first awoke in the Maguuma jungle.

Aqun: It takes a Lot, she’s very very emotionally level and good at keeping things in perspective. If anything were to happen to Roanna, Jioro, or Veirett though she would cry.

Tvelle: Sad sappy stories, really really really cute things all make her cry

Whomstdve: Average sad shit sometimes, she doesn’t really cry much

Laighe: She really tries not to cry in front of people, but she’s woken up from nightmares often crying or dry sobbing. She cries over deaths of those she cares about.

Ennreck: If one of her pets dies or has to be put down, it’s a sad day on the ranch…

Aezlin: Are you kidding? Of course he doesn’t cry it’s not a pretty look darling~

Vellask: If the spores infect or kill someone she didn’t intend, she gets incredibly sad and very apologetic to that as-good-as-dead person.

Terizzi: They have a lot of panic attacks that lead to tears. Also if they are somehow isolated from their creatures they’d sob in a panic.

Strair: Illiadde dying or Lace dying would make them cry. Good luck getting them to admit it though!

Kvold: So much makes him cry, he’s a very sweet very emotional boy. Such a sweetheart, especially since recovering from his Court conditioning.

Embrant: Wrelia being hurt makes her cry, and also when anything happens to harm the Grove. Death makes her cry a lot.

Rieft: Not much! She’s not one to react to things by crying, so much as by acting accordingly as necessary. She handles sadness through cheering up with friends and honoring whoever has died.

Illiadde: She doesn’t cry.

Cue: Lace being in danger, Lace being distressed, Lace being badly hurt!

Odollumn: She doesn’t know what emotions are, she came out of the pod a biiiiit faulty.

Regniette: A very Asuran asura in terms of temperament, they don’t really cry over much, just think about how to logically get an advantage back after.

Nimue: Death or loss of vitality in anything makes him cry quietly.

Ezra: She’s not one for sad emotions or caring about people, so she doesn’t really cry!

Fhariem: When she hears about the few other Courtiers she likes dying or falling to the more violent Court ways.

Envert: She doesn’t cry, just laughs manically!

Cherie: If someone doesn’t want to be his friend, meaning he actually has to fight them instead of working things out nicely :c

Fuilliome: He cries over friends being hurt, he knows he has made enemies and feels pretty guilty if it bounces back on anyone he knows. He’s made a habit of only befriending people who can really handle each other.

Renee: She used to cry over catastrophes and big disasters, but now it’s more if you’ve seen one you’ve seen em all. Truly overly happy moments will make her cry though.

Tenor: Friends dying makes her sad, she might cry a little performatively. Ans she will cry to save face or garner pity from others, she’s just a sweet perfect noble girl after all!

Jioro: Aqun or Roanna or Laranthir facing any pain would make her cry, but she’s pretty overall tough and ornery emotionally.

20. What was something they struggled with greatly and how did they overcome it?

Taomesin: They struggled with the difficulties brought up by asking for help and being ignored or punished for it, they overcame this by learning to never ask for help or voice concerns ever again! c:

Nixxte: They struggled with the complete vicious removal of their lower jaw, but over time they’ve recovered and learned sign language and have both a work and casual set of artificial jaws made!

Tirs: She struggled with the betrayal of her first girlfriend, Envert. But she’s been able to move forward, learned none of it was her fault, and has made some very supportive friends who’ve helped her regain her old vitality and enthusiasm!

Mint: They have struggled with Most Of Their Life, fraught with torture and rape trigger warnings that they think they’re finally recovering from but are actually still thoroughly buried in thanks to a very manipulative boyfriend who’s fantastic at gasslighting and confusing Mint.

Bodacc: She’s struggled with integrating into asuran society, having been raised through Charr society. She’s still trying to overcome either her charr-like habits, or her need to be accepted by other asuras.

Mango: She’s chill! Hasn’t really struggled yet.

Imekaari: He’s struggled with how closed off Lace is, and the fact that he’s not naturally a confrontational person so isn’t good at trying to get Lace to understand they need help. But he’s been getting better with this, having actively gotten Lace to open up to him at least and now he’s also been able to full-on enforce bedrest and recovery for them! One day he’ll even get them to finally seek out actual therapeutic help.

Tojoll: tbh she hasn’t had much difficulties! She’s my happy commander, no one has died everything has been a victory! This Kralkatorrik situation is the most difficult situation for her so far tbh because the fucker just won’t die.

Elaphurus: They struggled with a lot, primarily the fact that when Mordremoth died their memory was wiped completely! They awoke afraid and confused and have slowly been learning the world and about themself with the help of very nice new friends.

Aqun: Earlier on in life she struggled with being taken seriously as a soldier, being visibly a rich girl who’s been handed everything in life. But she has worked hard and proven herself to be someone who’s very self reliant, responsible, and worthy of a title.

Tvelle: She struggled as a kid fitting into asuran society. She was a lot more hotheaded and started a lot of fights in school. She eventually ran away shortly before joining a college, and joined the Vigil. Over the years she’s mellowed out quite a bit, but has found people who respect her choices and lack of discipline and has worked on passing on that support to others she meets who need a helping hand!

Whomstdve: Nothing yet! She’s chill

Laighe: She’s struggled with SO MUCH and hasn’t truly overcome any of it yet. She’s a walking mess, it’s a wonder she’s still holding herself together honestly.

Ennreck: He’s not your average charr, not very confrontational and a fan of alone time. Early on he left the Citadel and moved far away, eventually stumbling onto olmakhan territory, spending some time with them, collecting supplies, and building his own ranch in the desert nearby!

Aezlin: He has no difficulties, he gets whatever he wants! If something is wrong Oriphio will fix it~

Vellask: She struggled greatly with being infected by a parasitic fungus that latched onto her brain! It was nearly fatal but she was actually able to somehow manage to communicate with it, the two have worked out a mutually beneficial compromise in which she lets it spread as she travels and it doesn’t kill her so she can be a mobile distributor for it.

Terizzi: They went through a few things in a row, first falling to Mordremoth and then being captured by inquest for studies and experimentation. It was extremely traumatic and terrifying, and they still haven’t truly recovered. They cope by not trusting ANYONE now and living an incredibly isolated life with their pets.

Strair: The one thing in their life they struggled with truly was the one time they failed an undercover mission and were caught by the White Mantle. They have permanent physical alterations, and would have died in there if Lace hadn’t convinced Illiadde to come save them. They made a solid recovery though! They really have nothing emotionally to recover from.

Kvold: Spent years and years being extremely emotionally abused and manipulated, eventually he was forcibly rescued from the Court and began rehabilitation in Lace’s house! He’s still very cautious about emotionally investing in people now, since it ruined most of his life and mentality, but he is healing. He’s reconciled with Wrelia, helped Liaur also escape the Court, and has rebuilt a lot of friendships!

Embrant: Her biggest difficulty was when Wrelia had completely broken down. She spent a lot of time gently helping her girlfriend recover emotionally, and was incredibly loving and patient. Now, the two are happily married~

Rieft: No large difficulties! Just a good ol adrenalin junkie having one hell of a time!

Illiadde: Her entire life is a struggle and she will never recover.

Cue: He basically lost his life from before HoT when he crashed with the Pact and fell to Mordremoth. He came out of the ordeal with severe anger issues and some mordrem features that left most people very not chill with him. He had a hard time finding work to survive on and was really just getting by until Lace hired him to build them a new house. Since then, the two got to know each other and the rest is history! They’re both helping each other grow from a lot of shit.

Odollumn: She never struggles, she doesn’t much care about difficult situations.

Regniette: They have died several times and have multiple deals with multiple entities to keep their body going! It’s a very bad coping mechanism for avoiding death and they intend to keep it up for as long as it’ll still work.

Nimue: He’s lived an actually very peaceful nomadic life, avoiding any stressful areas or people!

Ezra: She copes with everything by killing the source of stress, it’s never gotten to a point of serious emotional struggle for her before she’s taken the source out.

Fhariem: She struggled with seeing the Court change from using Nightmare to separate from the dream, to enforcing nightmare upon others as if they were no better than the Pale Tree. She tried for a while to change things from inside the Court until leaving it to go join the Priory to preserve the more ‘honorable’ history of the Court.

Envert: She struggled with getting kicked out of the Grove, though she really changed nothing about herself and is now incredibly bitter that they’d kick her out over some meager experiments. She’s since gained her own very very shady lab in the middle of nowhere.

Cherie: Has not struggled, is a good and pure happy boi!

Fuilliome: Hasn’t truly suffered, loves his job, is good at his job, has had some sad or difficult moments but is well adjusted overall!

Renee: The first big catastrophe she saw end a civilisation was tragic for her, she was broken for years. But as she lived through lifetimes and seeing cities rise and fall, she has reconciled with the fact that no matter how much ruin strikes, life will always find a way to rebuild. Things will always move on.

Tenor: She’s spoiled and makes sure she gets exactly everything she wants! No big struggles for this horrible woman!

Jioro: Major social anxiety has actually been a huge struggle for her, though with those she counts in her loved ones she can make it through events now without leaving early. Though she still hates social events overall.

22. If they could change just one thing about themselves, what would it be?

Taomesin: They’d be more durable, they find their loss of limbs to be a hindrance and it means at least a couple days getting used to prosthetic limbs when they could instead be working on saving the world.

Nixxte: They’d like their lower jaw back pls

Tirs: She’d like to be a little less jumpy in serious relationships, Envert left quite an impression.

Mint: They’d like to be cured from their PTSD, they want to be okay again…

Bodacc: She’d make herself smarter, trying to fit more into typical asuran standards.

Mango: She’s actually quite happy as is!

Imekaari: He’d like to be comfortable being a bit more assertive when necessary.

Tojoll: She’s Flawless and very content with herself

Elaphurus: They’d like to look less intimidating to people, they just want to make friends and learn about the world

Aqun: She’d like to not have died once and tied herself to Glint to come back. She finds Glint weak and spineless and undeserving of boing sort of back in the world after she put the weight of the world on a child.

Tvelle: She’d like to be a little less intense emotionally, she can come on a bit strong to new people which makes some people uneasy at first.

Whomstdve: She’s Cursed And Perfect

Laighe: She’d like to be more confident in herself and not so unsure about what she’s doing. So much has happened and she’s feeling so lost but like she can’t stop…

Ennreck: Sometimes he wishes he was a bit more of a typical charr, but overall he’s generally content with how his life has panned out. He’s living a tough but happy life.

Aezlin: He’s FLAWLESS he’ll never need to change at all~

Vellask: She’d honestly love to not have a parasitic fungus hitchhiking in her head any more.

Terizzi: They’d like to not be Damaged, to not have gone through the jungle or the experiments.

Strair: A little more flexibility could be nice~

Kvold: He’d like to have been born to the dream instead of to nightmare. He’s never truly gotten to be a dreamer or feel that connection.

Embrant: She is actually quite happy as she is! After all, the love of her life thinks she’s perfect as is~

Rieft: She’d like to have a little more bulk to her, and is working on that!

Illiadde: She’d like to be dead.

Cue: He’d like to lose his mordrem features and his short temper fuse

Odollumn: She doesn’t even consider changing herself.

Regniette: They’d like for their body to be more durable for easier upkeep between deaths.

Nimue: He’s quite content as is!

Ezra: She’d like to be even faster and stronger, play with her prey longer than she already does.

Fhariem: She’s content as is, it’s the Court that she thinks needs to change.

Envert: She wishes she seemed less suspicious to people, it’d make it easier to pull in new test subjects!

Cherie: He’d like to be a little less naive, though honestly he’s not doing much to change that and he really is just so trusting and friendly and hopes the best of everyone.

Fuilliome: He’s happy the way he is!

Renee: She’s actually quite content, she’s immortal so if she ever has or does want to change anything she has all the time in the world to make it happen.

Tenor: She’s so happy in her current life. No changes necessary~

Jioro: She’d like to severely lower her social anxiety so she can function in society better.

#kid-oddity #this is EVERYONE #I had to take breaks in answering this there's so much to think about with it holy shit #enjoy this endless response #holy shit #characters

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