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#if you are trying to make some sort of joke it’s not working. now please excuse me I have to figure this out
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The Vees are Overlords but also a business, therefore they hold meeting and work with clients right and workers? Well what if a Business client or worker unknowingly said something about Retro!Reader in a meeting?
If its before Vox it come be commenting on Retro's cooking, as I see Retro would always ensure Vox had home made snacks for while hes working. Something like "That House Wife of yours is decent in the Kitchen, I see why you keep them there"
If its before Valentino I assume its after Retro brings him something between shoots, some fool would comment on Retro's looks or ask why Retro isn't one of Val's 'Stars' kinda a "Bod like that should be in those sheets"
Velvette would most likely be dealing with jealous models who don't know fully who Retro is but Retro gets to walk in, get the nice personal design treatment from Velvette and not have to talk the cat walk? Bitch fight would incoming.
Hope you don't mind my ramblings and if this sparks something Hooray!
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He would destroy the person in question if it’s an insult^
Vox is always boasting about Retros cooking, how skilled and talented they are. He literally never shuts up about it. Now, the demon who said ‘I can see why you keep them there’ might have meant it as a sort of joke or some shit, but Vox would not be pleased. He does not take kindly to people who insult or degrade their partners (ironic, considering Valentino), so someone who’s making that sort of implication about his wife? Death.
He’d sort of chuckle and go ‘excuse me?’, daring the demon to repeat themselves. It’s over for them either way. If the demon backtracks, Vox will very pointedly dedicate the rest of the meeting to bragging about all of Retros other skills, too. He’d try to start by mentioning it off hand, but he’d get so invested in proving a point to the low life that insulted his wife that he’d get carried away. He’d go on and on about how creative and thoughtful Retro is, how nice they are to everyone, including those who work at the company. He would not-so-politely remind everyone that Retro knits sweaters for people at the company picnics, how they always cook at least half the food at the company get together and parties, stuff like that. It’s a stupid move to insult Vox’s wife, but insulting the person who everyone loves just because of how nice and kind they are? That’s ten times dumber.
Valentino would shoot a bitch on sight if they made a comment about Retro in bed. Yes it’s hell, insults and comments like that are to be expected, but he has standards when it comes to Retro. Val is so unbelievably protective of them when they come by the studio, it’s startling. He knows what Vox would do if anything happened, and Val doesn’t want to see Retro in any sort of compromising situation to begin with. He’d do his best to keep everyone in line.
He’d shoot glares and insults at anyone who looks at them the wrong way, anyone who looks at them for too long. Keep in mind, Val is in a wonderful mood whenever Retro visits him at work. They help him with scripting, and he’s always admiring them and gushing over them. He draws little hearts in the margins of his papers and sometimes lets them on set. He’s always nervous about it, but it works out nicely. They usually only help adjust someone’s clothes (with how few they’re wearing, it’s very important), the perspective of cameras, sometimes the hair or makeup (only a little). They know exactly what Val is looking for, and how to get the scene how he wants it. They’re calm and polite and everyone is just so relieved about it. Retro even does their best to make sure the actors are comfortable, the clothes aren’t too tight, the clasps work correctly, things like that. So yeah, if someone makes a comment about them, they’d be lucky to only receive extra hours of work as a punishment.
Velvette? Okay, if Retro was the type to confront people, Vel would record the entire thing. Unfortunately, Retro usually pretends they don’t hear a thing. They’d rather ignore it and keep up the nice and polite house wife routine. They’re probably busy admiring their lovers, anyway. So, instead, Velvette would shoot a model a glare and walk right up to them, demanding they tell her what makes them think they can say such a thing.
Retro gets treated special because Velvette respects them, thinks they’re awesome and adorable and can’t do anything wrong. Mostly. So, the fact that one of her models (people she sees as frequent fuck ups) would try to put themselves on Retros level? The fact that someone would even think they’re anywhere near as good as them, anywhere near as deserving of Velvettes attention and affection as Retro? A ridiculous notion. The model is lucky not to be torn apart by Val. Velvette would go off on the model, listing every single mistake they’ve made in the past hour alone.
The workers at Vee Tower learn not to fuck around when it comes to Retro pretty quick.
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theneworchestra · 2 days
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The next move into the modern era is NOW! Here at the Kinito Leisure and Entertainment Company, we pride ourselves on always looking ahead into the future. And it couldn't be clearer to us: folks, the future IS digital desktop assistants on your personal computer! And that's why we, along with our top programmer Sammy Chamberlain, are excited to take this first step into the future with our new line of virtual desktop companions! Each one is tons of fun, and offers a variety of different functions!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Finally, at long last, the most awaited addition to the lineup is finally here! Your dear friend Kinito the Axolotl combines the best parts of his buddies' work, and then goes one step beyond! With his new-and-improved R.R.A. technology, there's no limit to the things this cuddly little creature can do! From entertaining the kids (and kids at heart), to managing your system and preventing dangers, and even engaging in realistic conversations, Kinito truly is the ultimate companion. So why wait? Download KinitoPET today, and make a new friend for LIFE!
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hey, so uh... yeah! This is a new thing I decided to do for the heck of it. I know I tagged it as an "AU", but I dunno if I'd call it an AU in the traditional sense... it's more like a "what-if" kinda scenario, ya know?
What if Kinito wasn't the only one to get a desktop assistant made?
Do those count as AUs? ...Eh, maybe.
Anyways, I hope you enjoy, nonetheless!
(Also, please try to ignore the specks you see. I've tried to clean my phone camera and it hasn't worked out, so just... yeah. Just bear with me on this one. Anyways... yeah. See ya.)
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shower-phantom-ideas · 8 months
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Danny as Fenton takes a hit that no human boy should survive while in a different city (im going crossover here) and just transforms into phantom and pretends to be all sad that he died. Just for a moment. He then proceeds to kick the baddies ass. Claims he got ghost powers and fucks off. Imagine if Captain America or Batman saw this while failing ti protect him, hell or any hero type. Danny doesn’t think much on it and just goes on with his week. Continues being Fenton of course but what if he runs into whatever hero, but out if costume, saw him do that.
“How are you here? And alive?”
Danny holding a smoothie:”uhhhh I made a miraculous recovery”
He just shrugs it off and goes about his day. It isn’t until he finally gets some sleep later that night that he wakes up in a cold sweat realising he now knows their secret identity. “Oh well it’s neat I guess” starts to go back to sleep only to bolt back up “oh god now they know my secret identity”
Meanwhile said hero is too busy trying to figure out how to help this random kid to even be worried about the fact that they outed themselves. Someone else probably points it out to them and has to explain it twice before it gets thru.
#danny phantom#crossovers#dp x mcu#dpxdc#dp x dc#I like to use batman a lot cause his need to protect these kids probably makes him a little stupid#like imagine him in the batcave looking into fenton now and nightwing comes in starts asking about it#only to have to find out that bruce basically told the kid hes batman#except bruce is tired and worried so he isnt getting it#no B I mean like how does bruce wayne know the kid died. only batman saw it#if you are trying to make some sort of joke it’s not working. now please excuse me I have to figure this out#a sigh and facepalm#B imagine what the kid is gonna think when bruce wayne asks him how he is alive but batman watched him die.#slowly bruce stops typing and leans back from the computer#he freezes#eyes widening#a soft but sharp intake#oh#yea oh B geeze you must be tired if it took this long for you to get ut#bruce with his head in his hands realising he just messed up big time#maybe he should get more sleep after all#as for the mcu I would like to think it was hawkeye or hulk#I like hulk cause it’s also a bruce but I like hawkeye more. guy is very comfort character#clint just kid I saw you die now why don’t you explain that#danny giving him nothing till clints like come on it’s kinda messed up letting me think I let a kid die isnt it.#oh poor me loosing so much sleep watching a young boy become a ghost. I could hardly go on#danny rolls his eyes laying it on a little thick arent we old man#gasp! I will have you know I am only (insert haskeyes age here)#geeze you are waaayyy okder than I thought
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predestinatos · 1 month
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you mean everything - MV1 ೀ⋆。🌷
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summary: max needed a wedding date and you were used to being his fake partner.
tags: max verstappen x fem!reader, fake dating, friends to lovers, max is so whipped, fluff, a bit angsty maybe?, mentions of alcohol
word count: 2k
notes: i've been writing (and thinking) so much about max... my period is coming please give me a break i'm sensitive. also would love to get some feedback if possible so i know if it's worth making a series out of this!!!!
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"If you want to make it believable at least hold my hand" you half-whispered to Max, who was buttoning his blazer while getting out of the car, you behind him.
"Sorry, I'm not used to this with you" he said chuckling. His sweaty palm held yours tightly, and the feeling of it was odd. Knowing Max for so long meant that these romantic gestures felt almost cringeworthy to you both, and you both had to put up award winning performances every time you played this game.
The game in question being fake-dating. It started as a funny joke where you both thought it would be great to test out the Get A Champagne Bottle For Free At This Restaurant If You Propose theory (which worked, by the way). From then onwards, you used each other as dates whenever asked by annoying family members, creepy coworkers, or just because you felt like lying.
The talking wasn't hard - you both felt comfortable in that part, lying with words coming off almost dangerously natural - but when it came to acting the part, both of you felt awkward, like kids who found relationships absolutely repulsive.
This time, though, the performance would last longer than usual: it was a wedding. Max's friend's wedding. Max could've just gone along, or bring a friend (even you as a friend). Yet he had told his friend, after one too many shots on his Bachelor's Party, and after being chosen as The Guy Who'll Take the Longest to Settle, that he had, in fact, a girlfriend. His friends didn't believe him, so he showed a picture of you two together - a selfie really, nothing much. And they still said they didn't believe it. So here you are.
You couldn't blame him, even if you wanted to. You agreed to use each other as a fake partner for as long as you could in as many situations as required, although when it all started none of you ever thought it would lead to wedding attendances.
So now there you were, Max's hand on yours, entering the small church. His eyes locked with the groom, who waved and called for you to sit near the altar.
"So you ARE real" he said, nervousness laced in his voice even as he tried to lighten the mood himself. You giggled at the irony of it, nodding as you said your congratulations.
"Just wait until the guys see this" he continued gesturing towards the bench where 3 other men around his age sat. Men you had seen before in some Instagram pictures, men you spent the previous night trying to memorize basic information about so you didn't sound suspicious.
Max's hand now fell on your waist almost instinctively - it wasn't instinctively, he told himself once he noticed its positioning. And if it was, it was only because he took this so seriously, almost as a sort of method acting. Sitting down next to his friends, he noticed how all of them seemed surprised at your presence, and something like pride filled his chest. He loved winning, loved being right even if he was lying; but most especially, he loved how jealous other men seemed to be over the fact that he was (at least in their minds) dating you.
He couldn't deny - though he tried, really - that you two looked good together. His rougher features mixed with your softer ones gave you both an aura of near unreachability, which yes, was pretentious of him to think but he thought nevertheless.
The ceremony was quick and endearing, a smile spread across everyone's faces at the shared loved between the bride and the groom. As the crowd clapped, Max leaned into you, "don't tell me you're crying". "I am, just to think that I'll have to keep pretending to date YOU for the next 10 hours" you replied, his mocking smile recognizing the joke.
The reception hall was beautifully decorated with shades of soft green and violet orchids. Max tried not to think about how much it matched the shade of your dress, how you looked like you had come to life from a classical novel. He tried to feel like anyone but Mr. Darcy as you felt so much like Elisabeth Bennett to him.
Sitting down next to him, you found this part easier - mingling and socializing was something you enjoyed more than he did - especially with alcohol in the mix. It's a wedding, you thought; this is what weddings are for.
So you drank the wine with the main course and sipper champagne to celebrate and ordered a few cocktails when it was time to dance and talk - and you felt it on your body almost as much as you felt Max's hand occasionally sitting on your thigh, but not even close to how strongly you felt his thumb caress your skin as he did so. Truth was, he too was drunk; his eyes looked smaller and his cheeks were flushed, and the amount of times he ran a hair through his dirty blonde hair had caused it to look messier. As you looked at him, you felt he never looks as attractive as when he is like this - loose and carefree, his shirt sleeves rolled up and a smile on his face when he notices people laugh at his joke.
"I have to admit I didn't think it was true" his friend said when Max left to go to the bathroom. He looked drunker than the two of you combined, his words hard to decypher, like a riddle. "He's been talking about you for months now and we never saw you for real so we thought you didn't exist" he laughed, and you laughed back before it registered.
"Months?" you asked him, eyebrows furrowed yet attempting to remain composed. You shouldn't have asked it - a supposedly month old girlfriend wouldn't be surprised but you were his fake month old girlfriend and you weren't understanding it anymore.
"Yeah. He talks about you so much all the time I think even we started to date you" he laughed again, yet this time you didn't find the joke so funny. You were frozen in your seat, merely blinking as if trying to put the confusing puzzle together, the pieces not quite fitting the way you thought they would.
A touch on your shoulder unfroze you, almost like magic, like a disney film come to life. You turned around to find the groom, somewhat sober, smiling at you while also looking somewhat concerned. "He's calling for you... And he's also absolutely wasted" he said, pointing to the door of the hall.
"Shit" you cursed, getting up from your seat at a speed you couldn't believe, worry filling your heart, making you forget the conversation you were just having.
Opening the door to the garden outside, you found Max sitting down against the wall, shirt partly unbuttoned and disheveled hair. When he saw you, he grinned, such genuine happiness laced with tipsiness.
"Lightweight" you mocked as you crouched in front of him, trying to balance yourself on your heels, somehow managing it despite your own drunkness.
"You're laughing at my mis- Shit- my misery" his throat bobbed up and down, exaggerating his own agony with a hand on his chest and another on his forehead like a Shakespeare character.
"I have to admit it's quite fun sometimes" you bit your lip as you fixed his hair as best as you could, hands brushing through its soft, blonde mess.
"You're so– you're so sweet" he said, his words dragged and messy. He brought a beer bottle to his lips but you stopped him before any liquid touched them.
"I think that's enough of that for tonight" you grabbed it and placed it behind you, sitting in front of him.
"See now... Now you're being mean" his hand grabbed a strand of your hair and played with it softly as he pouted.
"Okay big boy I'm gonna get you some water" you say, getting up once again, yet his hand stops you, grabbing your wrist tightly.
You looked at him, startled. His drunken state is visible, and it felt frustrating that you had to be the one sobering up for him. The music vibrated through the wall he leaned against, somehow tickling him, making him giggle.
"Stay," he managed to say, eyes half closed, "I'm so glad we're- Fuck things are spinning so much" his hands rushed to his eyes and his head hung low, "Ah fuck. I'm so glad we're datin- Fuck, no, oops-" he continued laughing despite how sick he felt, the whole situation sounding hilarious when filtered through alcohol.
You giggled along with him, mostly because you wanted to see if you could convince him to move, scared he might feel worse or pass out on the cold floor if he doesn't do so. "Fake dating. Fake dating, I know. I knowww" he continued, his words dragged and his finger pointing at you before poking your nose with such innocent sweetness you were taken aback.
"Max" you tried to sound more assertive but found it hard to do so, your own intoxicated state making the situation lighter than what it actually was. Your heart racing was a symptom of it, one you wouldn't feel if sobriety was an option, you thought. Max's eyes wouldn't seem to stare at you differently were he sober as well, and the way he scanned your features, his gaze staying on your lips for longer than expected, wouldn't affect you in the slightest had you not drank some alcohol.
"I like it when you say my name" he looked up at you innocently, pleading, almost.
"Want me to say it again?" you asked, smiling. You complied with these demands because you knew they were childish whims of an intoxicated man, his happiness a priority in times like these. Upon his nod, you started saying his name, half teasingly, half reassuringly, the leaves rustling in the garden behind you.
"Max... Max!! Max Max-"
He shouldn't. It would complicate things, and he liked when they were simple, clean and organized. He knew he shouldn't even when his whole vision spun and his brain convinced him that he should do things he would never do otherwise. But every time he refrained from saying something he would stumble across all his words and trip and fall and his head would only hurt more, and it seemed as if he could only focus if he kept listening to you and talking to you and looking at you.
The lights shone behind you in a way that made it feel as though he was dreaming, like you were a mirage, too good to be true. Maybe his friends were right - you weren't actually real. He wanted to be sure, in that moment. That you were real and that he wanted you as much as he thought. And though he shouldn't, though it was a terrible idea, he couldn't help but lean over to kiss you.
He tasted like champagne - bubbly and slightly sweet, his movements sloppy given his state, yet you couldn't help but drink it all in. Part of you - a big part - reciprocated the kiss, felt his fingers on the side of your neck, pulling you messily towards him, and tried to steady him, guiding him gently with your own lips.
It was odd, how this felt so right yet the fake hand holding didn't. As Max kissed you, that thought entered his clouded mind - did it feel wrong because it was fake and this was real? Your skin felt so soft, so much softer now he could touch it freely and unapologetically.
"Fuck-" he started, pulling away, his head resting against the wall once again as he stared at you, noticing how it hasn't hit you yet; what you just did, how it affected everything. "I fucking love you" he shrugged as you fixed your hair, pausing with arms raised for a few seconds before smiling softly.
"You're drunk" you replied, looking at his own grin, the gleam in his eyes making him appear both innocent and guilty of so many things.
"I'm drunk and I fucking love you"
"Max..." you started, and he said your name back to you with such tenderness you couldn't believe his lips tasted of alcohol earlier and not something sweet.
"We'll talk tomorrow, okay?" you continued, waiting for the silence to swallow you both.
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luveline · 10 months
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Miguel requests you say? 🤭 how about grumpy lovesick Miguel giving spider girl a hickey cause no one’s gonna notice right? only for someone to notice lol he’d be teased relentlessly.
thank you for your request!! —miguel gives spidergirl!reader a hickey. fem!reader, 1.5k
Miguel runs his entire life based on the assumption that there's not enough time. The multiverse is caving in on itself and he's probably the only one who can stop it —he doesn't have time to be kissing you in a dark hallway on the way to the control room. 
He doesn't have time and he shouldn't be doing this here, but you looked at him like he hung the moon for making some stupid joke, and you're always lovely, sweeping around him without worry to ask how he's feeling today, to touch his arm and really mean it. Did you get any sleep? 
He's not thinking as his hand closes down on your shoulder to pull you forward, not thinking as he chases you back into an alcove, not thinking as the seam of your lips parts under the pressure of his kissing, as you sigh into it, as your hands go limp where they're pressed to his neck. 
Miguel used to be better with words. He kisses you until you can't breathe, taking and taking and taking, your touch and especially your open-mouthed kisses a balm. And as you catch your breath, your hand rubbing affectionately at the back of his neck, he tilts your chin up with a no-nonsense thumb and noses at the column of your throat. He's trying to be quick and forgetting to be nice, nipping little welts like a line of longing from your jawline to your collar, hand hooked in your suit and holding it down for a better angle. 
He thinks, if he were to let the suit spring back into place, no one would see what he wants to do. 
"Can I?" he asks, hand full of your face, your head weighed heavily to one side. 
You're breathless. "I'd let you do anything you want to me," you say honestly. 
He attempts to ruin your right there in the hall. The hand that isn't holding your face squeezes at your waist unabashedly, pulling you as close as he can get as he works his teeth against the delicate skin of your neck. Open-mouthed, Miguel plasters damp crescents up to your pulse, where he stays, where he bites. You shudder at the feeling. Your happy sigh eggs him on. 
He's feeling pretty smug about the whole thing when he finally arrives ten minutes late to the command centre. The platform starts to rise under his feet, Lyla on his shoulder, Margo at the helm. You sit on the edge and swing your feet, hand drifting to your freshly bruised neck and prodding gently. He wonders if you've ever had a hickey before, and concludes you likely haven't; you've no room for subtlety. 
The smugness fades. You don't have a subtle bone in your body, actually, and he didn't ask you to hide it. He's not sure he wants to —you don't want to be his secret, and though it humanises him too much for his liking in the eyes of some of the other Spiders to have evident feelings for you, he doesn't want you to feel that way. You probably think the hickey is a 'freaky' badge of honour, the way you function. You'd sounded oh so happy to get it, and you'd kissed him when he pulled away like you were saying thank you. 
You definitely have some misconceptions Miguel needs to set straight, and he will. Just not in front of Lyla. He's only now started setting boundaries with the AI, like, try not to watch what I'm doing all the time, and, please don't pop into existence to make snarky commentary at my lame attempts at romance. It sort of kills the mood.
The day moves forward smoothly. Miguel might actually get away with it. You ease back fully onto the platform with your back to all of them, a book in your lap, humming at odd times until you forget to hum. Lyla runs calculations. Margo runs the teleportation room. Nobody notices anything unusual, not the mess of his hair from your squeezing fingers nor the rumpled neck of your suit. 
Legs crossed, you lay back and stretch your arms up toward him. He notices your movement from the corner of his eye and turns to give you a reassuring smile. He'd say he needs to find you a job, but there are enough spiders doing enough jobs. You have a training course tomorrow for strike force, but today, you're good to lounge about on the floor and send him lazy winks. 
Peter B. Parker arrives, and of course he brings trouble. 
"Hey, Spider," he calls, nodding at you, then Margo, and then Miguel. "Spider, Spider. Hi, Lyla." 
"What do you want?" Miguel asks tiredly. 
"Lyla asked me to come," he says. 
"For what?" Miguel asks Lyla. 
"Peter's useful. You need two team captains today in case the canon events on Earth-898 and 1264 converge at the same time and there are anomalies. I don't see why I have to tell you this." 
Miguel groans and he and his AI descend into an argument. You wave at Peter from the platform as it begins to descend toward him, fingers spread and swaying like sea grass. 
"Hi, Peter," you say, "where's Mayday? I'm owed a baby hold, you promised." 
"I did, I did promise!" Peter says. He squints at you. "I think I made one of the Spider-Girls that looks like you hold her, actually. That would explain why she was so confused. Woah, what happened?" 
Three heads turn at Peter's surprise. You stand up and hop the small distance from the platform to the floor as it stops moving, confused. "What?" 
"You have a bruise the size of Hawaii!" Peter's eyebrows jump his forehead. "I thought you were looking after her?" he asks Miguel. 
"He is," you say, less confused now. 
"What bruise?" Lyla asks. 
"It's not appropriate," Miguel says. "Margo's here." 
"Margo," Lyla says pleadingly. 
Margo sighs at the acute and abject unseriousness of her colleagues and logs out. As soon as she's gone, Lyla whizzes from Miguel's shoulder to yours, and while the hologram can't move aside your suit's high neck, she doesn't really need to. The dark colour of your hickey peeks out regardless. 
"Jesus, Miguel," Lyla says, "what's wrong with you?" 
Peter looks a funny mixture of embarrassed to have brought it up and pleased. "I mean, good for you guys." 
Miguel's surprised when you —tries to make him dance in public, lackadaisical, carefree you— pull the neck of your suit up and bat your hand. Lyla zips away from your fingers. 
"Please, stop," you say, laughing uncomfortably. 
Miguel hadn't considered how you might feel if you were discovered. He winces and steps off of the platform to get his arm around your shoulder. "Peter," he says, feeling wildly over protective, "you can do my tasks, since you're here. Lyla will help. It's my lunch break." 
"You don't have a lunch break." 
"I barely said anything!" Peter protests. 
Despite a batch of grumbling complaints, Peter climbs onto the platform, dragging a chair to Miguel's crop of orange screens. 
You let Miguel guide you to the hall, an apology on the tip of his tongue. You're a few steps deep when you drop the sad-sack act and spin out of his arm, turning to face him. A devious smile curls the corners of your lips up. "That was good, right?" 
"You're not upset?" he asks, eyebrows set into their usual frown.
"Nah. You wanted to get out of there, right? Your cheeks went pink." 
"They did not." 
"They did! Like when you kiss me, they went all pink, you can practically see how warm you were." You make a heart with your hands and press it to your chest. "Saved you, handsome." 
He looks up at the ceiling. Of course you know him well enough to know he wasn't keen on being teased. Of course you're not embarrassed at being marked up and discovered. You love his attention, you love all the boyfriend‐like stuff he does, kisses and hugs and hickeys, the whole job lot. He doesn't need to worry. 
"Thank you," he says. It's sweet of you to rescue him. You're a sweet woman. 
"You're welcome. Maybe next time, if you're going to get shy, you could give me one where people won't see." 
"Stop," he warns without heat. 
You laugh and twine your hand with his, yanking him down the hall. To the cafeteria, he guesses. He wouldn't know. He's never been there. Miguel really doesn't have a lunch break. 
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coucouatoi · 2 months
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don't want to be alone | h.s.
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Pairings: Harry Styles x Reader
Summary: Divorcing the biggest superstar on the planet is the hardest thing you've ever done. Almost as hard as marrying him was.
Warnings: Angst, couples therapy, a little bit of fluff, hopeful ending
A/N: I don't know why I'm feeling so full of angst... but, please enjoy!
Flashback are in italic and present day is normal text
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Boxes are littered around the house. Some full and taped shut others still being stuffed with your items. It's a slow and torturous process, having to choose what to take, what to throw out and what things are a conversation waiting to happen "That's a wedding gift from my aunt" or "When have you ever used that?" or even better "I know it was a gift, but I paid for it so i'll keep it". It's like he knows exactly which buttons to press to get the fights started. Granted you might be doing the same thing... But it doesn't make him entitled to all the belongings you've ever shared.
You've managed to find all the picture albums, the ones you decided to make for sentimental value. The ones you gifted him in tender moments. The ones filled with so much love, so much hope and promises for a future together. The ones you're now highly considering throwing into a paper shredder and tossing into the nearest incinerator. The ones you won't be able to get rid of. The anniversary album you gave him on your one year, the wedding album, the honeymoon album, the many travel albums and, of course, your daughter's first album.
Little Anya, barely 9 months old just starting to babble her first words. Chubby legs working so hard to keep her standing and exploring. She can barely take 3 steps one after the other but she's a fighter. Your little girl that is now a cause for argument, no, fights. Custody battles. The true war between yourself and your husband, Harry Styles. Neither of you want to lose or call for a tie, it's not how either of you operate in conflict. That, most likely, is the reason for the downfall of your relationship.
Frustrated you put the albums back where you found them and you head to the kitchen.
Most kitchen items have been packed up, Harry had never really invested in worthwhile cutlery or electronics of any sort. You take some orange juice from the fridge and pour a glass for yourself. The fridge itself is barren, with only the essentials left... neither of you has gone to the groceries in weeks. Today is not going to be a good day.
From the rediscovery of your love-filled albums to the boxes you've spent most of the day doing, you still have one horrible thing to do.
Couples therapy, your first-ever session. You thought, well still think, that this is too far gone to save in therapy. There won't be anything new shared that you haven't already screamed in each other's faces and self-help talks aren't exactly going to do the trick. Anne, Harry's mother, insisted that your marriage doesn't only include two people anymore. Anya makes it worth trying, she is worthy of a stable home as she grows up. No matter how unstable having a superstar parent may be, divorced parents might just add to that an unruly amount. So, you've both agreed to try. Try your very best to reassemble your love no matter how shattered it has become. Love. Love hasn't manifested itself once since about your seventh month of pregnancy. Love has vanished from your husband's once warm and inviting eyes, it no longer lingers on his fingertips and doesn't even creep into the more tender moments you must share with your baby. Love feels like a complete joke to you now.
-
The waiting room is empty of other clients which is a blessing in disguise. This is the absolute last place you'd want to run into Harries. Even if the media has already been dragging you in the mud for "breaking their dear superstar's heart" and has been making all sorts of claims about you and your marriage. In the very beginning, Harry had spoken up about these articles and had gotten his team to shut some people up but he's been losing care for... well, you.
"Harry and Y/N?" you look up meeting the eyes of who you can only assume is your therapist. Without sparring your husband a glance you get up and follow her into her office. It's cosy and smells like vanilla. There's a yellow glow to the room, it bounces off her multiple frames and decorations. Very nonthreatening, immediately putting you a little more at ease. She gestures for you to take a seat on her velvet green couch and you sit down squeezing yourself onto the left armrest. Harry does the same to the right.
"Good afternoon to you both, I am Trinity Finch. Can I get either of you something to drink before I sit down?" She smiles politely as her eyes shift between both of you. You only shake your head as an answer not trusting your stomach at the moment.
"Water if it's not too much trouble, please" Harry's voice is strained, he had been at the studio all morning probably preparing a new album you aren't aware of.
Trinity nods and quickly grabs a water bottle from a small fridge she's got right behind her desk. Harry mumbles a thank you as she hands it to him. You don't realise that his hands are shaking as you're back to looking around the room. He takes a few big gulps before your therapist gets to sit in her chair.
"Today I would just like to start with a history lesson on your relationship. How it started, all important moments, how parenthood has changed your shared life and just how you two are as a couple" She starts getting things ready around her, notebook, pens, highlighters, some sticky notes and you swear that you spotted some bright childish stickers. Her long manicured nails tap against the glass of her desk a few times as the silence stretches. Neither of you taking the first step in this session. When she looks up again she doesn't look annoyed or surprised by the lack of an answer.
"Harry, how did you meet your wife?" Trinity asks him gently.
Harry seems caught by surprise to have been asked a question directly. He looks at you briefly before turning his eyes back to her.
"Um, we meet on the plane. For some reason, my private plane for that day was not available and they booked me on a regular flight. Premium ended up being full and I got an economy seat. I had the aisle and she had the middle we ended up bonding over our shared movie choice. Then I asked her out and um here we are?" He ends with a question. As if unsure if "here" is a good thing, it's definitely not but meeting has, unfortunately, brought you both here.
"And when was this?" she asks.
"April 2018" he answers quickly. She nods presumably writing it down.
"How was your relationship before marriage Y/N?" she looks at you now with kind eyes. They are big and dark. Staring right into your soul. It makes you slightly uncomfortable but at the same time you don't want her to look away she's your lifeline right now.
"It was very easy. I work remotely as a translator and an editor, so I've always been able to tag along on his travels and tours. He, um, he always insisted that he rather have me with him even if we couldn't see each other every single day. Just knowing I was near helped him..." you sigh. You don't want to shed tears this early into your session. You don't want Harry to see you cry any more than he already has over your lost relationship.
"I really loved following him around the globe" you add, looking down at your lap willing your wet eyes to dry.
"Any fighting? How did you deal with that?" Trinity is still talking to you maybe even sensing that you're about to cry. Is that what she wants from this?
"Well, yeah. I mean all couples fight, right? We fought over the same things all the time really. I wanted more affection I guess pressuring him to take some time away from the spotlight or he wanted me all to himself whenever it worked with him without thinking of my work. Our jobs were the main reason for fighting between us" Besides you, Harry scoffs before taking another sip of water. Your head turns to him
so quickly that a sharp pain forms in the back of your neck. Your posture immediately tightens, muscles locking and your breath gets heavier.
"What? You don't agree?" you question him in a much harsher tone than you were previously using. He meets your gaze and shrugs.
"I do but that's not all we fought over" he shrugs again not looking away. Is he trying to pick a fight right now? Here of all places?
"Then what? What am I missing?" you prepare yourself for the worst. Ready to feel like absolute shit at anything he might say.
"Your constant jealousy was a contender for the most appearances in our fights" his entire expression is accusatory but he does this thing with his posture. Gets all soft and somewhat blazé making you feel inferior and so incredibly small.
You want to storm out. Call Anne to apologise that it couldn't work out and immediately sign the divorce papers that are permanently placed right on your dining table.
Not wanting to fuel this energy taking over him right now you shrug as well before facing Trinity again. She's watching both of you like a hawk, processing the way you react to conflict with each other. Making mental notes as well as some physical ones all while hostility happens between her clients.
"We'll move on from this for now. Harry, how was the wedding? How did married life change your bond?" this seemingly calms his overgrown ego. His face is neutral again but there's a softness to it now, recalling the happy days.
"We had an Italy wedding. We, I love Italy. I flew everyone out, our families and friends, and then we stayed there for a month more for our honeymoon. The wedding itself was... amazing. We kept it small. Intimate. With my life it's always been hard to have that so, it was important to us" he sounds blissful towards the last part. Probably back there now in his mind. Ah, the good old days as they say.
"I don't think married life changed us much. We were living together before that and we'd been planning it since we got together practically" he stops talking again to take another sip of water. You look at the lady in front of you again and as she begins to open her mouth to probably question him more Harry starts talking again.
"I guess tension started about a year in. The media wasn't kind to her. They made up cheating rumours on both sides and manipulated things to make them seem like something else. Someone even showed up at our old house while I was out" he took a deep breath, cracking some of his knuckles at the same time, "We were always on edge around each other. Throwing these rumours at one another just to I don't know, get a reaction? Plus, we were stuck at home because of Covid and my tour was postponed. It was a real shit show" he laughs bitterly and you nod along to what he was saying. That was just a terrible time. For everyone.
"Then I got to go on tour, Y/N didn't follow along for all of it but she was there most of the beginning. It wasn't the same as before. There was this distance that just never got better. And then she got pregnant" he almost sounds exhausted. Maybe he is, you're not sure how much he's slept lately.
-
Shit. Fuck. This can't be happening now. Shit! The word "Pregnant" seems to be mocking you as you look down at it. Mocking the fact that you and Harry have not seriously spoken in two days and that you're flying back home tomorrow. Mockingly reminding you that this can only make things worse right now.
"Y/N, come on the car is waiting downstairs" your husband's voice is weak through the thick hotel bathroom door. He's performing in Toronto tonight. The second day, the last day before he flies to New York and you go back to London.
You walk out of the bathroom, straight past Harry, not wanting him to read your face and figure out that something is terribly wrong. You slip into your shoes for the night and take a deep breath, no scratch that, a huge breath. Willing your facial expression to cooperate before you turn to him and smile.
"Let's go superstar!" he smiles back and walks over to you. Grabbing your hand and bringing it up to his mouth so he can plant a kiss on the back of it.
"We just might have to cancel tonight if you look this good" his free hand wraps around you tightly glueing you to his body. You know he doesn't mean it but you pretend to consider it nonetheless.
"Mh what about all your adoring fans? Won't they be so utterly crushed?" you tease against his lips. He smiles wickedly before slowly nodding.
"I do have quite the engagement this evening... how about I make it up to you after?" he presses soft kisses to the sides of your face. Framing it.
"That's a pretty good offer, I just might have to tak-"
"HARRY STYLES GET YOUR ASS OUT OF YOUR HOTEL ROOM!!" Jeff's voice is full of annoyance as it cuts you off. Rude.
You laugh before getting pulled out of the room by your husband. The small plastic stick forgotten on the washroom counter for now.
You get a harsh reminder tho when you're back at the hotel after yet another amazing concert. You're laying on the bed completely stretched out and now only dressed in your underwear. Harry's currently using the washroom to try and get some of the remaining glitter off his face when he finds the secret you've kept all evening.
"Y/N, what's this?" his voice is so shaky that you barely even understood what he asked you. However, when you look up your brain catches up. He's in his boxers, left hand in his hair and right hand holding the test like it's made of glass as he looks at it as if it's going to explode. Fuck.
"No chance that you suddenly lost the ability to read?" you try and lighten the suddenly very heavy mood in the room. It fails.
"You're pregnant. How, I mean no I know how. Fuck, you're pregnant" he looks up at you panicked.
"We don't have to keep it" is the first thing out of your mouth. Probably as a panic response to his reaction. Not wanting this to turn into another fight.
"What?! Why wouldn't we, you don't want, I um" he takes a second. He's just breathing heavily while looking at you desperately. "You don't want to keep it?" he breathes out.
"You do?" is all you answer. You stand slowly, finding the clothes you just took off to put them back on. Whatever mood you were in is gone you're now filled with anxiety and a deep fear.
"You leave tomorrow... We won't see each other for what 3 months? In Mexico?" he hasn't moved an inch. Feet seemingly glued to the floor and limbs were frozen.
-
Pregnancy. One of the worst and best times of your life. Your gorgeous baby girl came out of all the pain you suffered. She gave a new meaning to the way you live, made you forget about all the physical pain you endured and...
"Why do you say it in that way? Like you still dread what the pregnancy brought" Trinity's voice almost startles you. You'd been so lost in your thoughts that you'd almost forgotten where you were.
"I don't! I love Anya" his voice is stern.
"What about your wife? What happened during the pregnancy?" she's digging. Wants to find the right buttons to push.
Harry stammers, but no answer seems to satisfy him. His hands are squeezed under his things, his right leg bouncing and his eyes avoiding either of you.
"We didn't plan her, I was right in the middle of my tour. We, um, we weren't doing very good and she was about to go home" he looks at you suddenly surprising you when he meets your eyes. You can't read him, can't understand what he's feeling. You haven't been able to read him in months.
"She- You, Y/N, she got really sick in February the seven-month mark. I was in Australia and I couldn't be there. It really strained us, we fought all the time over the phone and in person. I guess that's really when we went downhill" his jaw tenses when he looks away from you. Looks like he's not happy to have to have shared this with the room.
"Okay, thank you, Harry. I think now's a great time to take a breather. I'll meet both of you individually when we come back. So, see you both here in 20 minutes?" Trinity smiles at both of you and keeps smiling until you both walk out.
-
Harry doesn't come back. You wait 45 minutes in Trinity's office looking like an idiot. She dismisses you with a look of pity on her face before scheduling another appointment 5 days later, lots of work to do you assume. You rush out of the building humiliation creeping into every inch of your body. How could he do this on the first day? It was going fairly well, well you think so anyway... did he give up on your relationship right then and there?
As you make your way to your car you see him. Harry is pacing back and forth in front of his car as he seemingly argues on the phone. His free hand waves erratically in front of him, gesturing like mad for someone who can't even see him. So this is what he's been doing? Arguing over the phone while you sat in a therapist's office waiting to try and work on your ever-crumbling marriage. You scoff before turning away from him and to your car. But nothing seems to be on your side today as your husband hears you and immediately calls out to you.
"Y/N! Why are you leaving?" you hear him walk towards you, the clacking of his shoes getting closer to you but you ignore him and walk away faster.
You're completely focused on your black Subaru, the "You're so Golden" sticker catching your eye and making you more pissed off. Something that was put there because you loved the song, because of how beautiful your husband's voice is in the song but now all you want to do is rip it right off. So, that's what you do.
Your nails claw at the edges of it desperately. You don't want any reminders of Harry on your car, you don't want to think of him while putting the groceries away, while walking around the car after putting Anya in her car seat and you don't want to see it in your rearview mirror anymore. The top corner lifts as you're pulling at it giving you the perfect leverage to rip it right off. You throw it to the ground right before turning around to stare daggers into Harry's eyes.
"45 minutes, Harry. I sat there 45 minutes with our therapist looking at me like a beaten dog!" you hiss at him. He is now only about 2 or 3 feet away from you. His eyes are wide, in shock you guess, as he looks at the sticker. "What could you have possibly been doing for more than an hour that made you forget what we were here for?" you're sure you sound desperate right now. Your head is all over the place and your heart feels like it might explode out of your chest.
"An hour? I, no, that couldn't have been more than-"
"You can go back up and ask her if you want because I really really don't want to be around you right now" and now you're crying. Fuck. Why are you crying now? You need to leave.
While rummaging in your bag for your keys Harry grabs your arm. Well maybe not grabs, he just places his hand on you, resting it there delicately. If you weren't so aware of every single inch of your body right now you wouldn't have noticed. No matter how delicate the touch is supposed to be you flinch out of it aggressively.
"I'm, I'm so sorry Y/N. That was my mother, she, fuck" he sighs and runs a hand in his hair gripping it tightly. "She wants us to go up... she's rented a lake house or something I guess" his voice is so soft, shy even.
"Us? You mean you and Anya?" god you hope so.
"I'm so sorry" is all he answers.
-
Anne Twist is a very difficult woman to say no to. Actually, it's impossible to say no to her. In the many years you've known her, she's always been able to find a way to make you say yes. Always in a good way. She loves you, she has told you that countless times, and you love her but now that you're... the way you are with her son you don't know where you stand. Yet, she has still found a way to get you to agree to something you would have much rather not have gone to. You're in a small townhouse almost 4 hours away from your home in London with your mother-in-law, your daughter and your soon-to-be ex-husband. What has your life come to?
Anya is sitting in her high chair passionately eating banana slices as you watch her. She's already gobbled up the strawberries and pita bread slices she also had for her snack. She's such a good eater always so ready to try new things and taste whatever the adults around her eat. Especially the sweet treats her dad sneaks her.
"Do you want to go take a dip after huh? We should enjoy the water my love" you coo at her as she takes her final bite of food. She smiles at you like she understood what you asked and you chuckle wiping her chubby cheeks and hands. She'll be able to float around in the water for a little bit with you before you put her down for a nap. The steps of your morning are perfectly planned so that you can have your solo Zoom session with Trinity.
There is a small river behind the house you're staying in. The water goes up to just above your breast and it's the perfect warmth at this time of day. You've made your way down to it and are now setting up Anya's towel for when she'll be too tired to entertain you and ready for her mid-day snooze. She's currently lying right by you looking up at the sky with such curiosity, probably trying to figure out what the hell clouds are.
"You're so curious my love!" you shake her gently as you smile widely. "What do you see up there?" as you look up to join her sky-gazing you spot Harry making his way to the river as well. He's only got very short grey swimming trunks on meaning his entire chest, thighs, calves, and arms are out for the whole world to see. Maybe that's an exaggerated statement as you're the only one looking right now. You want to scold yourself for staring, you really really do but he's just so... so captivating and very enjoyable to look at no matter how much you resent him at the moment.
"Mind if I join you ladies?" his voice is more cheerful than when you heard it last. Must be because he's actually speaking to and looking at Anya.
However, when you don't answer his question he looks up at you. Expression now closed off again, how it's always been for the past few months. You smile politely and nod before turning your back to both of them so you can take your robe off. Your swimsuit isn't anything special; simple black one-piece that's high on the hips and low on your back. You think it looks pretty good on you but now you feel very aware of the amount of skin you're showing. You decide to just get in the water hoping its dark colour hides you. Hides away the skin your husband might be looking at.
"Looks like mummy is in a hurry, we should join her. What do you think sweetheart?" Harry picks your baby up and makes his way into the water. He holds her tightly to his chest as he climbs in, just in case he slips on the stones he uses as stairs. Once your daughter's chubby limbs meet the water her mouth forms into an adorable "O" shape. It's the second time Anya's been in the water now so she must still be unsure about this feeling. Harry turns her so that her front faces you and her back is against him. She smiles when she spots you reaching her arms out quickly which splashes some water around. She looks at you with a shocked expression and does it again with a giggle now.
"You little troublemaker! Trying to splash me!" you tease her sending some water her way. She answers with a sweet giggle and shakes her arms around as fast as she possibly can.
"Mh, my jokester gene is strong in her" Harry's voice is laced with pride. You playfully roll your eyes at him and hum affirmatively.
"And her love for singing too" you add remembering so many moments where she hums to any song playing. Her favourite thing to do is to harmonise with her father. His deep voice always gets her attention, always gets her to mumble and hum along with her own lyrics.
"Oh yes, she's the next big thing this one" he affirms kissing the top of her small head affectionately.
It's in moments like these that you tend to forget how bad it is between you. How many horrible things you've shouted at each other not caring how deep your words could cut. The accusations, the insults, the taunts and even the lies still weigh heavy on both of you. You like these softer moments, where you're reminded of how much love you both had for each other. Have? Had? You don't know anything about your feelings anymore, they are much too complicated to understand...
All three of you stay in the river for about an hour more before Anya starts yawning and fussing. When you exit the water you're quick to slip your robe back on still overly aware. Harry wraps the fluffy towel you had gotten ready around your baby. Her head rests in the crook of his neck, her eyelids already heavy as she blinks slowly. You all walk back to the house together silently. Might it be to keep the sleepy baby calm or to keep the peaceful aura around you and your husband, you don't know.
Harry insists that he will put the sleepy girl to bed and that you should take a shower first. After all, you have the first private sessions with your therapist. The mention of her does make the air in the townhouse tense again but Anne appears immediately to kiss Anya before she naps. You use that moment to sneak into your shared room with Harry. Luckily, it has two single beds so you don't have to share with him.
Signing deeply you rid yourself of the now damp robe you had on. Another blessing in disguise, this room has an en suite bathroom so you'll be able to jump right into the shower. Before that you do want to set up your laptop for the video call, you want to be as ready as you possibly can be. You grab your device from your backpack and make your way to the small desk in the corner of the room. There's a bunch of papers scattered around it, one glance at them and you immediately know what they are.
Lyrics. Drafts of songs and melodies written by your rockstar husband. You don't mean to read any of the words you really don't but as soon as you spot your name at the top of one of the pages you're doomed. You put your laptop down on Harry's bed which is right next to the desk and reach for that exact paper.
The words you read are full of longing, pain, sadness and fear. They mourn love, they are mourning your love. You pick up another sheet of paper, this one has no title but there are so many lines written. This one is reeks of self-hatred, of shame and guilt... it shakes the weak barriers you've built around your heart. All of the lyrics you read on different papers revolve around the same emotions. These are all about your relationship. About the death of it. About his desire to turn around. You don't realise you're crying until a tear falls onto the paper you hold. The ink bleeds into itself where it's been wet blurring the words slightly. You quickly wipe your face and put the papers down. You shouldn't be looking at these, you're invading his privacy.
"Thought you were showering" Harry's voice startles you out of the chair. You meet the floor with a loud thud. Your tear-filled eyes meet his sharp ones. Scrambling up to your feet you grab your laptop ready to explain, ready to apologise over and over again.
"At least tell me what you think" he sighs walking into the bedroom and shutting the door behind himself. This shocks you. What does he mean? He, he's not mad? Isn't disappointed that you invaded his creative space? Your mouth opens and closes a few times unsure what you should answer.
"I'm sorry" is all you're able to get out. Your brain is blank in absolute fear but tears keep falling from your eyes.
"I should be apologising... you, you weren't supposed to see those" he walks in your direction slowly, testing the waters of how close you'll let him get. He's closer than arm's reach when you flinch backwards slightly and he stops immediately.
"I was going to ask you for your permission before making any of those full songs but you know music is how I cope" he whispers now that he's so close to you. Silence takes over the room again, stretching out for too long. Your eyes somehow keep producing tears as you try and speak. Hopelessly searching for words to say.
"Do you really miss us? You miss me?" is what you come up with, your voice is so shaky that you're on the verge of sobbing uncontrollably.
This shocks Harry in place, seemingly not prepared for that kind of questioning from you. His mouth gapes and his eyes grow wide. This time you do see his hands start shaking. You're not entirely sure what this emotion is.
"Of course I do. Did you not think so?" while still whispering he reaches out to hold you but stops himself hands falling at his sides.
"Yo- Harry, you asked for the divorce. How was I supposed to know you miss me?" your voice breaks. You don't understand, why is this happening now, why is he saying these things?
-
"We should just get a divorce" Harry snaps at you as he fights back tears. Your expression immediately closes up, your body reacting before your thoughts and words do. Protecting you from what he just said, building walls around you and your heart as quickly as possible.
"Fine" you spit out as you turn away from him and walk straight out of your bedroom. If that's what he wants then so be it. You won't beg for anything now that he's made his decision.
-
"I know, okay? I know that I asked for it and that it's the reason why you don't talk to me anymore. Well, you do but not really" he sighs and sits down on his bed, damn swim trunks wetting the bed "We talk about Anya and when we're not we are yelling at each other... so when was I supposed to tell you that I missed you? That I regretted asking for the divorce..." he looks at you with a guilty expression, all his emotions are coming up at once.
"Why did you ask for it?" you ask him sitting back on the desk chair with your laptop still in your hands.
"I got in my head. You were saying we should take some time for ourselves maybe live apart... with everything that kept being said about us, I got so scared" he takes your laptop out of your grip and puts it down next to him.
"I thought you were going to fight me on it..." he adds as he grabs your hands tenderly. Like he's afraid you'll break.
You shake your head in disbelief not sure what to say. Your thoughts are all over the place, what should you make of this?
"It broke my heart" When did his face get so close to yours? You should really move away. You can't fall back into him, you can't let yourself do that. So you pull away from him roughly, your hands tugging out of his hold, face moving to the side, a sob making its way out of you as your back meets the chair-back.
When you meet Harry's eyes you can see the pain, the hurt, in them. They are brimming with tears that are so close to spilling out.
"Are we... are we too broken?" his voice has dropped to a whisper. He sounds so sad and scared.
"I'm worried" You take in a few breaths before you speak again, "What if we just end up hurting each other again? What if we can't go back?" you choke out the last few words. Tears spill endlessly out of your eyes and sobs rack your entire body.
It feels like you're running out of air and the little bits you get in are painful. Your eyes burn as you cry and your hands are shaking like crazy.
Harry might be answering or trying to communicate but nothing is making its way past your meltdown. What does make it through is the feeling of his arms around you. Him pulling you against his chest tightly, immediately rubbing your back as soothingly as he can. Your hands are grabbing his still bare skin desperately, wanting to anchor yourself in any way you can. Your face rests on his peck, right above his heart, the frantic beating bouncing around your head.
"Breathe, you have to breathe love" he speaks delicately in your ear, breaking through the barrier your body has put up.
"I'm- I'm, I can't... Harry I can't" your clawing at him almost trying to get under his skin, someplace you might be able to understand everything that's going through his mind.
He wiggles around a little before laying you both down as he keeps reassuring and encouraging you. He drags you on top of him your face now pressed up against the juncture of his neck. Your left-hand makes its way into his hair, pulling at it as softly as you can manage. Harry's hands run up and down your back, your arms, and your neck and he even pets your hair delicately. He's always known how to best calm you down... how to bring you back down to earth and out of the panic attacks you sometimes get when you're overwhelmed.
"I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry" he repeats that over and over with a pained desperation. Harry's scared shitless too. He doesn't know how things will go with your relationship. He can't guarantee that you won't end up actually wanting a divorce one day... But he can love you. He has and will keep loving you. He hopes it'll be enough to save your marriage. He'll work incredibly hard every single day to prove his love for you... if you let him back in he won't ever let you go. He'll leave it all up to you. Your little family is all he needs, he'll spend the rest of his life proving that to you if that's what it takes.
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generalsmemories · 10 months
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The general's hair
✧ jing yuan x gn!reader
✧ based on the ask: "If requests are open, can I request Reader tugging Jing Yuan's hair to keep him from dozing or just wanted him to pay attention? You can choose the "severity" of the tug =DD" requested by anonymous
✧ content: established relationship, fluff, suggestive scenes (not nsfw, but you can tell it's hinting at it lmfao), humor, mentions of other characters
✧ a/n: dear lord we almost hit 500 jing yuan lovers. as he deserves, truly. thank you all for liking my two works so far!! here's another one while i still work on the lenghty angst fic of mine hehe. p.s please don't question my titles, i am very much terrible at them-
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One of Jing Yuan's striking features is his voluminous hair that adorns his head like a lion's mane. Tied into a high half ponytail while the rest of his locks flow freely down to his shoulders. It's eye catching for sure, with a red ribbon securing the ponytail in place, it's hard to not turn one's head when he takes a walk outside of the divine seat to escape his duties. 
You're well aware of how tempting his hair is to touch everyone. It's the one thing you always reach for whenever you're bored after all.
The first thing you always do whenever he's fresh out of a shower is brush it out while running your fingers through it, or make sure every drop of soap reaches every strand when you take a bath together. A pastime activity Jing Yuan adores doing with you, almost sounding like he's purring in delight whenever you take some extra time to massage his scalp while you wash his hair.
It's also the first thing you would always grab onto to ground yourself when Jing Yuan wants to show his love for you more intimately and passionately. Your primary instinct to pull his strands while trying to get him so much closer to you, a breathless plea for him leaving your lips every now and then. Your husband takes great pleasure from this, merely chuckling while leaning down to press his lips to your ears. Gently telling you to breathe while pressing himself closer to your own sweaty body. During these moments his hair cascades down the side of his face, making him seem a lot more ethereal than usual. And while you can hardly breathe from the sensory overload you always somehow manage to slide your fingers from his lips to thread through his hair with a wry smile, whispering how beautiful he is.
His hair has unfortunately for him recently become the thing you have pulled whenever you notice him start to doze around whether that be in meetings or in general. It was initially something you had done out of desperation since no matter how many times you told him to listen, your husband would already nod off a few minutes after promising you that he wouldn't. Whenever you had complained he has joked that your voice was too soothing to listen to regarding reports that he could fall asleep to it.
So you tried to let one of the cloud knights or Qingzu deliver the reports to thwart that, but then he would downright not pay any attention at all. Which would make some meetings run longer than normal.
God forbid if Fu Xuan even tried to attempt to deliver a report, lest she wanted to get poked fun at or have more people fall asleep other than the general.
So while you were trying yet again to give a report for the general, you were suddenly struck with the memory of one of the many nights you had spent together. The nights where the general would look so much more awake whenever you pulled at his hair from desperation.
… Hey if it worked there, it should have some sort of effect now too, right?
So without looking too suspicious, you went behind the seat. When you passed Jing Yuan's laid back form, your available hand that was not holding the papers reached out to the same high ponytail you had just tied a few hours before and pulled with enough strength that made his head jerk away from his resting hand.
A surprised moan suddenly rang out throughout the Divine Foresight.
And you thanked the Aeons that the only ones present at that moment were the same guards stationed at the very entrance and Qingzu, who only gave you a deadpanned look.
But when Jing Yuan turned to look at you, more awake than he had ever been in any morning and eyes filled with confusion, you were sure you had hit the jackpot to make every meeting go faster. 
Good news for you and everyone else, not so good news for Jing Yuan though.
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“The second matter of the day is the replacement of the newly appointed Cloud Knights who will be transferred to the Luofu from another fleet…”
“Ouch- Dear, pull my hair any harsher than that and I’m afraid you won’t have any strands to brush out in the near future,” Jing Yuan whines when your hand lets go of his high ponytail when he has successfully sobered up from his nth impromptu nap of the day.
You merely glance over at him with a raised eyebrow before walking away, “General, please be aware that you have a meeting with Lady Fu Xuan in a couple of minutes and these are just the briefings of what she will tell you personally,” you respond back, Jing Yuan letting out a huff as he leans back into his seat, rubbing the spot you had just pulled a few minutes ago with knitted eyebrows.
“... Let alone something to grab later tonight-”
“Jing Yuan.”
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oatsmeall · 3 months
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You and I?
Socially awkward!Jk! X f!reader | college AU
Warnings: Socially awkward jk, very awkward jk, suggestive themes, possible smut.
(人*´∀`)。*゚+(人*´∀`)。*゚+(人*´∀`)。*゚+(人*´∀`)
For as long as you've been coming to this course you've always seen this quiet guy, he always come in 5 minutes exactly before class starts, he brings the same black metal water bottle with one singular sticker, and he's always quiet but always raises his hand to answer questions. You didn't really pay much attention to him untill today specifically though, of course you noticed his usual quirks but today? Man, it's like he became a new man. You never thought the awkward nerdy guy would pull up to class late with new piercings. On his eyebrow and his lip. You were stunned to say the least, he's... Hot? This totally normal thing called being 'tardy' suddenly seamed like a sense of rebellion, especially for this guy, Jeon Jungkook. Wow, such a bad boy.
Throughout the week he'd show up less covered, usually he'd wear sweater vests with a neatly tucked shirt and black or brown slacks or occasionally jeans. Now he's been wearing oversized shirts and baggy sweats and jeans. And not to mention his entirely detailed sleeve on his arm, which has very much been in the works for quite the while you bet. Where was the cute nerdy boy you knew? This was a whole new man. Even the girls that never bat an eye started noticing. You weren't going to lie and say you weren't a little jealous. I mean come on? These girls were ignoring him just 2 weeks ago, now they're fawning over him and his new look.....
"STUDENT SETTLE DOWN PLEASE. today we'll be writing an essay about what we've learned this month. Please be sure to turn the essay in by Friday night." The professor was making y'all write an essay. This is so boring, you were just thinking about that comfortable bed of yours.
While digging in your backpack for your laptop and some paper, you couldn't find any sort of writing utensils. This was so annoying, how is it that Suddenly when you ACTUALLY need a pen or pencil you couldn't find one. Jesus Christ, what a unlucky way to start on homework.
"pssst, hey.. hey, ppsssst" you were trying to whisper call on Jungkook, he was not budging. "Jeon, hey" you were not getting anywhere. Suddenly he side eye looked at you. Okay?...
"what do you want, were supposed to get busy." He said monotoned, he really is still nerdy sounding.
"well I won't get anywhere near busy if you'd just hear me out for a bit. Do you have a pen or pencil I can borrow, please?" You're regretting asking. He's probably gonna decline and say 'you should've brought your own".
"hmm.. I do, but you have to give it back, I always keep 4 pencils exactly." Close to the response you thought.. kinda.
"ugh okay, thanks" ou! Fancy mechanical pencil! And it had a cool retractable eraser!
This essay was gonna kill you. come to think of it what did you even learn this month?....
You and Jungkook had became friends, this past month you slowly would talk to him or try to talk big conversations, you really found him interesting. He was like a new subject you were trying to learn about. You've learned he's quite....odd? He didn't get your jokes sometimes, he was unaware of social cues at times, and he was too straight up. You thought he didn't like you, he was so blunt. on a random day when you guys went to the library he commented on how messy your notes were, how your hair was messy and looked unprofessional for school, and even on how wearing Birkenstocks with socks was strange. He was nitpicking random things, things you wouldn't even pay attention to. This gave you a feeling of self awareness, you felt like he didn't like you, he was making you realize a lot of things you hadn't.
"Jungkook, I really like you but you've got to stop nitpicking things I don't even notice, I'm sure you can keep it to yourself? You don't hear me saying how the way you styled your hair today looks off from yesterday, or how you're wearing two different shades of black and I don't like that."
"why wouldn't you like it? I like it." He said confused and somewhat agitated.
You gave him a knowing look of "do you see now?"
He sat silently before asking
"do you really not like my two different shades of black?" There was a pause before you started giggling. He looked so confused, you couldn't help but giggle.
"alright. Wanna come by my dorm tonight? Study a little and maybe order takeout and watch a movie? Shrek perhaps?" You tried changing the conversation hoping he'd forget the little conflict.
This would be the first time you invite him to your dorm, you were too shy to ask, he was also shy though, more than you probably. You didn't want to make him uncomfortable.
"uhm..sure.. just send me you dorm number." He seemed shy just asking that, you were excited though. He was such a cute and smart guy, he was very helpful when studying. He taught you new things too, the other day he taught you about why pigeons don't know how to build nests.
Around 6:30 he texted you saying he's on his way to your dorm. You were SO nervous for no reason, you tried to tidy up around your room, and by tidy you mean deep cleaned. You've never seen such a clean room, you loved it though.
*Knock, knock, knock*
"Comiingggg" you walked to your door and opened it to Jungkook. In a black tee shirt and grey sweat pants.. you felt your hear beat faster. He looked so.. FINE.
"Hello Y/n, I didn't know what kind of drink you liked so I bought Gatorade, orange juice, and water. I hope you like.. these." He looked so genuine, you appreciate him for trying.
"oh wow! I like all. I wouldn't have minded your pick. Thanks though, come in. Make yourself comfortable." He came in and sat himself on your bed, he was looking around curiously. He was looking attentively, like he was gather information.
"sorry if you might not like the scent in my room, Im trying this mango air freshener out-"
"I like it. It's okay. So where are your notes and stuff, we can get started right now if you'd like, that way we can have more time to hangout..if you want."
This genuinely surprised you? He wanted to spend time with you? Your heart had a sudden rush.
"oh? O-okay, yeah. Uhm let me get my laptop." You hurriedly grabbed your bag, you bent down you're oblivious but your ass caught Jungkook's attention by accident. He stared.. he felt his blood rush down his pants.
"okay I've got my laptop!" You walked to your bed and plopped next to him.
His face was red. Visibly red actually.
"you okay?"
"y-yeah.." he looked away from you in embarrassment. Immediately onto his notes.
After a long hour and a half, you guys were done, you decided to order for delivery instead, Jungkook didn't want to go out anymore, you were tidying around your room, who new studying was messy.
"can't wait for that pasta, I'm hungry. Also hot, this hoodie is too warm" Jungkook look slightly, seeing you take your hoodie off made HIM hot.. his body tensed up. Your black halter top made your boobs look so good, he caught a glimpse of them before you turned to him.
"freeeee!" you said in a giggle.
He was respectful, of course.. but he still IS a man.... with male... tendencies.
"can I use your restroom, please? I need to wash my hands"
"why the restroom? I've got a small sink by the dresser." You pointed to the hidden sink.
"I have to use the restroom too." He said straight faced. He was trying to get away from you as fast as possible or else his print would be visible VERY quickly, maybe he shouldn't have worn grey sweats. Maybe two different shades of black wasn't bad after all like you said.
"okay, yea. It's that door right there." You're not sure why but you have a feeling you made Jungkook uncomfortable, what could you have possibly done.
*knock, knock, knock*
"ouuu pasta must be here. JUNGKOOK! PASTAS' HERE!" you got out of your bed and quickly answered the door. You're excited.
After some very awkward moments of eating and small talk you put on Shrek the movie, you guys were on your bed now. But you felt a sudden rush, you've been avoiding thinking about him but he's so fine. He's hot in this little ensemble he put together, the grey sweats made his print noticable. Your mouth felt dry all of the sudden. You felt and decided to lay down and drape your legs on his thighs. You felt his body tense up. This made you feel butterflies. It's almost like you had an ad advantage.
"uhm.. Y/n.. I- " you cut him off and looked up at him directly into his eyes. Oh those siren eyes of yours.. they're killing him. His eyes began to widen when he realized that you're now turned around facing his lap. More so his crotch.
"Kook.." you start innocently. "Have you ever been... Touched?" You said softly and quietly. You scared him. He can't comprehend how you'd gone from fun from "fun and nice, sweet and understandable" to "horny seduction demon" he's also never had physical Intimacy, only cute kisses and hugs. This was odd, he liked how he felt though. You gave him butterflies.
"N-no" you looked at him straight in his eyes again. This time you say up slightly and palmed his dick through his sweats. He let out an lewd quiet moan. Your pussy was pulsating from excitement.
"mm poor boy. Do you like when I touch you like this?" You say quietly. You began stroking the outline of his dick, then you pulled his sweats down following after, his boxers. His hard Dick sprung up. You were in awe at the largeness before your eyes. You didn't know what you expected.. but surely not this monster. The sayings are true. It's always the quiet and shy ones.
"auh.. fuck" he whispered lewdly. What a turn on.
"mhm? You like that kookie?"
Precum began to slowly ooze from out the tip. Red and sore from the friction being created from your hands. You started pacing faster, stokes becoming gradually faster.
"augh, f-fuck. I don't wanna c-"
You sunk you whole mouth on his cock. Filling your mouth with only half of his cock. You started deep thoating, harder and faster, the lewd noises becoming louder and messier. Chocking on his dick you took him like a champ.
"I'm not done with you babe." You say with saliva and cum dripping from your mouth. You're Cock drunk.
"Y-you're not?!" He seemed genuinely shocked.
You got up and sat on his lap, legs sitting on either side of his thighs. Your booty shorts rode more up your thighs.
You began to ride him. Fully clothed, you began riding, Jungkook instinctively grabbed your ass and pressed you down to create harder friction.
"mm- F-fuck. Oh my, Jungkook augh- you moaned loudly, your pussy was so wet and it was throbbing. Suddenly. Jungkook's switched. He became the lewd one. You never expected to hear something like this come out of his mouth..
"Yeah? You like that you fucking slut? You like seducing quite guys?" He said through his teeth in a hiss. Gripping your ass. Your so turned on at his sudden switch.
"mhm baby" you mewed.
"take the shorts off. Now" yes sir. Anything for Me. Jeon.
You got up off him and you did a little strip tease. It was better that what Jungkook visioned.
You slowly hopped back on him and you grabbed his cock and slowly sat on him. Man was he stretching you out. Nice and good.
"augh fuck Kook. You're so big" you said in a gasp. He just looked at you with a smirk. Man you loved every minute of this.
"that's right baby take me like a fucking champ" you sat on him completely but suddenly.. when you began riding, his speed increased, he began slamming into you.
"fuck, fuck, fuck, augh babe, you're hitting the spot" your moans were something straight out of a porn video.
"yeah? You like that? Look at me when I fuck you Y/n look at me." He said grabbing your face. Who is this man?! This isn't shy little Jungkook with the cute boba eyes?! This was Jeon Jungkook. The fucking man.
After what felt forever, you and Jungkook did some after care. He went and fetched you an after pill at the nearest pharmacy. Yes at 1 am.
You were beat. Inside and out. Literally. You felt numb, could hardly walk. Your pussy was sore. You can't count how many times he made you cum and squirt but he really overstimulated you. You're so ready for a part 2 of this.
The next day you went to class and sat with Jungkook. Suddenly he became shy again?! Two faced much?
Guys... Let me know if you want a part 2 lol, this is my first time writing a fanfic lol🥹
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strawbeerossi · 11 months
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This Is Me Trying
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Pairing: Spencer Reid x Ex-wife!Reader
Description: Spencer shows up at his ex wife’s door late in the night, riddled with guilt from years of their separation and needing to confide to her why he left her the first place.
Content Warning: Prison arc discussed but no spoilers, mention of PTSD, mentions of drug addiction/relapse, mention of violence, heart wrenching angst, crying, cunnilingus, fingering, unprotected sex, missionary, lovemaking, aftercare, happy ending.
Word count: 4.5K
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The last thing that she expected was to hear a firm knock against her apartment door. It was ten in the evening, who would need anything from her this late? Maybe it was Mrs. Martin, the sweet little old lady next door, wanting to drop off some freshly baked treat that she wanted her to try before she took it to one of her game nights. Which, Y/N had to admit, she loved when she’d come by with her signature chocolate chip brownies, she always made a heaping amount to share with her younger neighbor just because she expressed liking them one time.
She was approaching the front door. Using the peephole of the door, her heart sunk. Instead of seeing an older woman with a plate of treats in her hand, she was met with Spencer Reid.
It had been years since they talked last, the last time being a tearful Y/N begging her husband not to walk out the door, to stay and work out their marriage that she was afraid was starting to crumble into a thousand pieces. She could remember the bitterness, the hatred in his voice.
“Wait! Spencer, baby, please.” Y/N’s voice was hoarse from sobbing, her throat raw from having to yell over his loud voice just to get him to listen. “I know it’s hard but I need you to stay, we can work this out together. You know that. We always do.” Spencer was turning his head to face his wife, already packing his clothes away. “I don’t want to fucking stay. I don’t want your pity. Ever since I got home, you’re treating me like I’m some sort of child! I’m not!” His tone was laced with venom, enough to make the tears spring up in Y/N’s eyes again.
She knew prison would chip away at the Spencer she’d fallen in love with five years ago but she never expected things to go down like this. She’d done everything she could’ve thought of. She always made him some of his favorite dishes, she’d read to him, she’d hold him when he sobbed in her arms and relived the most traumatic experience he’d went through thus far. It was never enough.
He was different now. Irritable, temperamental, and he had a hard time composing his anger, not to mention that his once beautiful honey colored irises were dull, almost lifeless. He lost himself in prison, he wasn’t ever going to be the same. Instead of always greeting her with a hug and a smile after his days at the BAU or after cases, she was greeted to him starting to distance himself from her. It went from him coming home an hour late, to two hours, then three. She stopped making dinner, she stopped staying up to wait for him, she even stopped trying to reach out to him.
There was guilt, her brain rattled with so many what-ifs. If she left him alone more, would he have stayed with her? Would he have given her the same amount of love and dedication he’d once given her before? What could she have done to make him slowly begin to push her away, to serve her with fucking divorce papers?
Her tears stained the documents, her signature blurred out from how much she sobbed over the idea of losing the one real thing she’d ever known. No matter how much she wanted to hate him for his decision, she just couldn’t. Spencer had her heart, he took it with him out of the door when he left her, tucked away in his suitcase covered by the numerous suits and other necessities.
She was pulled out of her pain filled memories the moment she heard yet another knock. Was this a cruel joke? She was taking in a breath, collecting what little confidence she could manage to build up before she was unlocking the front door, her hand shaking from fear. As she was opening the door just enough to peak her head out, her lips were pursed in a fine line.
“Spencer.” Y/N spoke, her gaze firm on the man who had given up on her. “Hi, Y/N.” His voice was soft, a stark contrast to the tone of their last conversation. “Can I come in..?” He asked, though his hand was slowly resting against the front door as he pushed it open, Y/N taking a few steps back to grant him access. She should’ve slammed the door shut, she should’ve locked it and sent him on his way. Yet here she was, slowly closing the door as she invited him to make himself at home.
“What are you doing here?” It took a lot of courage for her to open her mouth, her arms slowly crossing over her chest. She wasn’t going to cry anymore, mainly because she was so tired of crying over him. She’d done it enough within the past few years, if anything, she should’ve been out of tears.
“I’m here to talk.”
“Talk about what?”
“Y/N. I haven’t been honest with you. Guilt has been eating away at me and I can’t help but feel shitty.”
You should.
She’d never say it out loud but judging by the face she made, Spencer already knew what went through her mind.
“I just want to apologize. You are owed that much. Whenever I got out of prison.. I was a different person entirely. I stopped putting much effort into any of my personal relationships..” He began, which before his ex wife could cut him off, he was looking up from his feet with glassy eyes. “It’s because I was getting comfort from.. Other influences. Dilaudid.”
Spencer’s last addictions never defined him throughout their entire relationship, in fact, she was proud of him. He’d been doing so good, the temptation coming up every now and then but she’d be there to push him, to give him so much love and support to try and curb the relapse that could occur.
“Drugs change the writing of neurotransmitters in your brain, which can lead to aggression or mood swings. That’s why I was always hostile towards you and why I didn’t want to be around you.” Spencer explained, eyes on the ground in shame while his hands were coming up to rest over his face. “I knew I had a problem, I did. There was one day when you were trying to get me to eat lunch and.. I wanted to hurt you.” His voice broke at the admission, unable to meet her gaze. “That made me realize that I had a problem. A problem that I couldn’t control. If I couldn’t control my emotions, I would get to the point where I couldn’t control my actions..”
Just the thought of that scared the hell out of him.
“I left because I didn’t want to hurt you. It would kill me if I ever did anything to you. I mean, I was already spiralling because of the vivid nightmares from prison. PTSD and drug use are a horrible combination, dangerous. I couldn’t risk hurting you.”
The explanation had hot Y/N like a ton of bricks. How could she not notice he had a relapse, she was supposed to be by his side and she couldn’t even fucking tell that he was struggling with impulse control as well as his emotions. “Why didn’t you tell me? Spencer, I could’ve helped you.” She whispered, stepping closer to her ex husband while slowly taking her hands in his.
“Because you didn’t deserve a damaged husband who would weigh you down. I can’t expect you to babysit me all day and night, it wouldn’t be fair to you. You have a career, you have friends, you have so much going for you. I wouldn’t have forgiven myself if you threw your life away to essentially take care of me.” His words were barely above a whisper, as if the two had a risk of anyone listening in on their conversation.
“You are not damaged.” Y/N scolded softly while she was squeezing his hands slowly. “Spencer, I love you so much, I’ll always be here for you. Wife or not.” She said softly while her hand was now coming to rest gently against his cheek, as if he were fragile and one wrong move would shatter him like a stained glass window.
Spencer was finally meeting the irises that he couldn’t ever get out of his mind, the way there was a shine in them. Eyes were the window to the soul and hers reflected a beautiful, colorful soul and a strong fighting spirit she always carried with her. Even when she was broken down, that shine was there.
Her love was radiating onto him at the smallest touch, the man’s eyes closing briefly as if to compose himself. “I love you so much, Y/N. I will never be able to forgive myself for the way I pushed you away, the way I ended our marriage. I should’ve confided in you sooner. I just.. I was worried about you.” His words were genuine, a gentle smile spreading across his face. “You have no idea how much I’ve missed you.” He whispered soon after.
If his pupils could be the shape of hearts, they would be. One thing about Y/N was that he adored her. He cherished her, took care of her. Even in the end when things went south, part of him still had that love that was locked away behind a crippling addiction that broke him down in the worst way possible. “When I wanted to just go back to using, I thought of you. How proud you’d be of me if I held off, how you’d tell me I did an amazing job getting back on track. You are my inspiration.” He whispered, his hands coming up to cup her cheeks, holding her face in his hands as his thumbs traced over her soft skin.
There was a soft smile gracing Y/N’s features. “I am so proud of you. It takes a lot to admit when you have a problem, it takes even more to better yourself. Even if I’m not fond of the way you went about it, I understand.” She was honest. She didn’t like how he had to divorce her and disappear from her life. Nobody in their right mind would be okay with that.
For the first time since he’d came inside, there was a content silence filling the living room. It was comfortable. For the first time, home felt like home. However as the both of them stayed within each other’s embrace, it wasn’t long before Spencer was leaning down to kiss her.
Their lips met in a bittersweet collision, as years of longing and unresolved emotions surged through their bodies. The kiss began tenderly, a delicate exploration of familiar territory, before gradually intensifying with the fiery passion that had once defined their relationship. In that moment, they momentarily forgot the pain that had driven them apart, reveling in the sheer magnetism that still bound them together. There was no more pain, no more wondering what had gone wrong.
Their tongues danced in a rhythm only they could understand, tasting the remnants of past love and the promise of a future reignited. As they reluctantly pulled away, their gaze locked, and they both knew that their love still burned strong, an everlasting flame that kept them bound together. After all they’d been through, the love and care was permanent.
While drawing in a breath, Y/N kept her gaze on Spencer before slowly running her hands up his chest. It wasn’t a suit tailored for him like she’d been so used to before, instead a casual cotton shirt. In a way, it was comforting. He thought about her at times where he wasn’t chasing evil men and women on cases, when instead he was home at.. Well, wherever he lived now.
“Do you want to stay tonight?” She asked after a moment, her words coming out slow and her tone delicate, as if she had to worry about scaring him off if she was anything but. “I always sleep so much better with you..” She added on soon after while playing with a loose thread on the shirt, almost as if she had to distract herself from the way her heart was nearly beating out of her chest.
It gave her flashbacks to when she and Spencer had first started dating, the both of them being soft with each other. The way that they’d both be nervous to ask the other to stay the night or when they’d be laying together and spoil each other in the wonders of intimate touch, their lips moving in sync.
That seemed so long ago now.
“Yes,” Spencer responded, not needing to spare a second thought. “I’d love to.” His own heart was racing, the feeling of being home slowly coming back to him. The comfort of Y/N being home, willing to hold him when he needed her. Tonight, he knew he needed her. In more ways than one.
Without a passing thought, the woman was being lifted into his arms while Spencer was reattaching their lips. There was love and need, yearning for the soft touch that they once shared. With the feeling of fingers tangling in his longer hair, he was almost running back to the bedroom that he’d remembered so well.
Without breaking the contact of their lips, Spencer was leaning down while carefully placing Y/N on her back, as if she was breakable. She needed to be handled with care, with appreciation. Not anyone would accept their ex husband despite his faults or listen to him when he’s explaining why he left. Most women would probably slam the door in his face. Not Y/N. Not the woman with a heart of gold. He didn’t deserve her love but she was willing to continue serving it to him.
Once she was on her back, Spencer was slowly pulling away. “I love you.” He whispered, the words just falling out of his mouth, reverting back to the ways that once were. The nights where they’d lay in the darkness, embracing one another during lazy post-coital conversations before falling asleep in those same positions.
“I love you so much.” He repeated as he felt like she needed to know his feelings never changed. His lips began to trail down her neck, his hands running down the silk nightgown. “I love you.” Y/N finally whispered in return, her head relaxing in her pillow while her eyes were fluttered shut, melting at each placed kiss.
Spencer let his teeth graze the now burning skin of her neck, eliciting a beautiful moan to fall from the woman’s lips.
This was heaven.
His lips were moving from her neck soon after that, his head lifting while the two were interlocking in a shared loving gaze. “You can keep going, you know.” She whispered, a little giggle leaving her lips at the way his eyes glistened in the soft lighting of the bedside lamp at her urging him to continue.
Spencer’s fingers were coming up to the flimsy straps of the nightgown, slowly pulling them from her arms while leaning down to trail kisses along her right shoulder. His hands were working to slowly tug the sleep garment off, almost as if he had to carefully unwrap a present to preserve the wrapping paper. He didn’t want to rush this. He wanted her to see how much he truly did love and miss her.
He’d take care of her tonight.
Once she lifted her hips to assist in discarding the nightgown, he was drinking in the sight of the near bare woman in front of him.
Spencer had eidetic memory, however, when it came to Y/N’s body, you’d think it was his first time seeing it. The way his cheeks would flush, the way he’d revert back to being the shy man who couldn’t help but stare as if she were a beautiful oil painting hanging in one of the highest esteemed art galleries in Paris, France.
He was now sitting between her open legs, eyes scanning over her body as his large hands were slowly running up her inner thighs. “I’ve missed you, so much.” He spoke, gaze now moving to the beautiful smile that was spreading across her face. “I’m glad you’re here.” She spoke softly, the two basking in the moment. There was no rush, no. Instead, they were enjoying the intimacy of soft touches, admiring bodies, sharing longing glances.
“May I?” He asked, fingers now getting dangerously close to the place where she needed him most.
“Of course.” Her head nodded, a blush on her face.
The panties she had on had a sizeable wet patch in the center of them, her body reacting so positively to his kisses, his touch, everything. His fingers were slowly running over her clothed cunt, electricity shooting through her body at the mere touch.
“My beautiful girl.” His voice was husky now, fingers looping in the waistband of her panties before he was tugging them down her thighs, a groan ripping from his throat once he could see her glistening pussy, sticky with arousal. “God, I love you.” He repeated for what felt like the millionth time in the night.
Spencer was getting up momentarily, pulling his shirt over his head before discarding his pants as well, leaving him in his boxers. As he’d gotten onto the bed, he was now laying between her thighs, hips pressed into the bed for when he ultimately needed relief of his own.
With one hand keeping her plush thighs apart, his tongue was now licking a stripe up her pussy, collecting just a taste of her arousal. Hearing her shaky breath from above him was enough to encourage his movements. After a few more long and teasing licks, his fingers were coming up to spread her puffy labia apart, his lips blowing cool air while the woman was mewling from pleasure, goosebumps spreading across her skin.
He ate like a man starved, his tongue lapping up all she had to offer to him, like eating one of the ripest fruits on the vine that was bursting with more flavor and sweetness after being freshly pulled from the tree branch. His chin was coated in her glistening juices, his nose brushing against her clit while his tongue was focused on swiping over her velvety walls.
With the sounds of pornographic moans filling the room along with the way her fingernails were digging in his scalp, it became to a point where Spencer was desperate for relief, his hips rocking against the mattress while he was focused on bringing the woman to her peak. As soon as he could feel her thighs begin to shake and her words were more incoherent, he knew what was to come next.
It wasn’t long though until he was pulling away, chuckling at the way she was desperately clenching around nothing as soon as he pulled away. “Hold on, pretty girl.” He purred, getting his fingers lubed up with his own spit before he was plunging them into the woman, a low moan leaving his lips as she was greedily clenching around his digits and pulling them in more.
“There we go.” He praised, the two fingers being thrusted inside of her needy core.
“I’m gonna— oh fuck, Spencer.” Y/N breathed out as her eyes were squeezing shut, her words encouraging him to fuck her faster with his fingers. She could feel the coil tightening in her stomach, her moans and whimpers of his name falling steadily from her lips.
All it took was him curling his fingers and pushing against her spongy sweet spot before she was cumming around his fingers, her hips rocking steadily against Spencer’s hand as she was doing her best to catch her breath, chest rising and falling rapidly.
As she’s ridden out the high, Spencer’s hair was being tugged in a gesture that was telling him move your ass, Reid.
So he was nearly stumbling to crawl up to hover over her again, the two attaching their lips in a much needed, more messy kiss than before. “Please,” She mumbled against his lips, making Spencer pull away. “Please what?” He asked, needing to hear her say it.
“I need you.”
Those words had his already hard cock aching in his boxers, making him stumble a bit just to get them down his legs before they were being tossed with the rest of the clothes in the bedroom.
“I don’t have a condom.” Spencer spoke, letting out a hiss of pleasure from the feeling of her hand wrapping around his cock to give it a few tugs. “We don’t need one. I don’t care right now.” Her voice came out in a desperate tone, making the man nod as he was letting her line up his tip with her leaking mound.
He was pushing into her slowly, sinking all the way to the hilt while the two let out a collective moan, Spencer’s head falling against Y/N’s shoulder as he let his eyes flutter shut, kisses being sponged to her shoulders as he gave her a minute. The way her hands were gripping onto him was a big indicator that just like himself, she’d probably not really gotten much action in a while.
“I’m ready.” She whispered, her arms wrapping around his shoulders as she was practically hugging him close. “I’ll go slow.” He spoke in return, now lifting his head to smear their lips against one another’s.
Spencer loved slow and intimate sex, the way they were pressed flush against one another, drinking each others moans while the world slowly stood still. His hips were thrusting at a steady pace, the feeling of her legs wrapping around his waist just to try and bury him impossibly deeper inside of her.
It was the ultimate form of love. Being able to savor one another, enjoy the closeness. There were times in the past where the two would talk and even giggle with one another while his cock was buried inside of her. It was comforting in its own odd way.
Tonight though, there wasn’t much talking. Instead there was soft, loving kisses, the mixture of moans and groans falling between the both of them, as well as the sound of the bed squeaking along with each thrust that the man made.
There was nothing but love in that bedroom, the two whispering sweet nothings to one another and making promises that would fully be fulfilled going forward. This was going to be the start of something beautiful, that was something the two were confident of.
“I’m close,” Spencer’s words were being muffled into Y/N’s mouth, the woman slowly pulling out of their shared kiss while she was bringing her hands up to cup his cheeks. “Me too, don’t stop.” Her words were soft, a moan leaving her lips as she was letting her eyes flutter shut, head falling back against the mattress as she could feel her stomach tightening again.
“I love you so much, Y/N. Fuck.” His words slurring together as he brought one hand between their bodies, his thumb swiping over her clit in order to have her cum first. He prided himself on pleasuring her first and foremost, himself being mostly an afterthought.
As the warmth of her orgasm was washing over her, Y/N was hugging him as close as she could get him while a soft cry of the male’s name slipped from her lips. Chasing her orgasm, it wasn’t long until Spencer was letting go, a few more thrusts doing the trick as his warm cum was filling her to the brim. The feeling had the woman shuddering in pleasure.
With a thin layer of sweat coating their skin and their bodies still intertwined, Spencer was turning his attention down to the woman who he felt an intense and burning love for. “I promise you that I am not going anywhere this time. I’m tired of fighting M on my own.” His words were soft, his breathing still uneven. “I love you and I never want to be away from you like that again..”
“I love you so much more. You know that I’m always here for you, right? No matter what you’re struggling with. We are supposed to always be by each other’s sides. I made that promise to you and I never intend on breaking it.” Y/N assured.
“How about we to get cleaned up?” The make suggested, forcing himself to move away from the warmth of her embrace briefly. Instead of letting her get up though, Spencer’s hand was wrapping around her ankle before he was playfully pulling her to the end of the bed, making the woman laugh as she was being lifted in his arms.
“You could’ve broke my leg!” She gasped, a teasing tone chasing the words as she was letting her arms wrap around his shoulders, lips pressing kisses across his face.
A she was carefully sitting her on the edge of the tub, Spencer was turning on the faucet. After he’d gotten the water warm enough for the both of them, he’d retrieved the plug for the drain. Approaching the bathroom cabinet, he was kneeling down and rummaging until he was grinning triumphantly as he was retrieving a bottle of bubble bath soap, holding it up. “I knew you’d never get rid of this. As dumb as it sounds, I was so pissed because I didn’t take this with me.”
After putting a generous amount of the soap in the tub and watching it foam up, he was waiting until the tub was filled to their liking until he was turning off the water. He was the first to step in, getting comfortable before holding his hand out to help Y/N get in, a smile on his face. Even if it was a little awkward considering he was a tall guy in a small tub, they managed to get comfortable together with her on his lap.
One of her hands was collecting a bit of bubbles from the water before she was moving to place them over his face, a little laugh leaving her lips as she’d given him a bit of a bubble beard. “How old are we?” Spencer asked teasingly as he was doing the same thing with her, the two unable to help the soft laugh filling the bathroom.
“So, I have a legitimate question,” Spencer began while leaning back against the tub, a smile on his face. “Does this mean we have to get married again?”
The question made Y/N pull a face as she was pondering over the question. He had a point. How did this work?
“I say yes. Only because I think you owe me a much bigger wedding this time.��� She joked, making the male laugh.
“My queen gets whatever she wants.”
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ghost-proofbaby · 11 months
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twenty four hours (modern!eddie munson x fem!reader)
HOUR EIGHTEEN
in which eddie shows you deftones, texts are missed and calls are answered, and lines are crossed once more for good measure.
→ tropes: enemies to lovers, forced proximity, slow burn
→ warnings: strong language, light dry humping?, upside down does not exist, minors dni
→ wc: 4k+
masterlist.
spotify playlist.
◁ previous part, next part▷
18:00 ─────────────ㅇ── 24:00
Steve-O: rise and shine, campers! time to get back at it with these wellness checks. gonna need some proof you two are still alive.
HOUR EIGHTEEN - 9:00 AM 
Eddie’s eyes narrow in concentration at your phone as his thumbs fly across the screen, navigating the Spotify app with ease to find the Deftones song he specifically wants. He doesn’t do as you had and go to their artist page – he searches with purpose, in no mood to scroll through albums to find the song he’s looking for. 
“I still don’t understand how you can type so fast,” you mumble, watching with fascination that you try to tamper down with faux boredom, “Even I can’t type that fast, and I own the damn thing.” 
He doesn’t even glance up as he scrolls along the screen, finding the song and clicking on it, “I’m just good with my fingers.” 
There it goes. The air from your lungs, once again vacating the premises as he freezes beside you. 
It isn’t fair. An internal whine that nearly works itself up your throat and out your mouth, making you want to stomp your feet like a child. You hadn’t even recovered from the casual drop of baby yet. And now he’s going to just say that? 
“Oh, God, I-” he’s looking up finally, eyes wide and stuttering with embarrassment, “Fuck, I swear to God, I did not mean that as an innuendo.” 
You open your mouth. You close it. You repeat the process. You’re fucking speechless and it’s a little bit embarrassing. 
“I’m serious!” he persists when you don’t reply, and only stare at him in continued shock, “Seriously! I- Fuck, I was referring to with my job. At the autoshop. I’m- Fuck,” he cuts his explanation off, dragging a hand over his face and falling back into the couch, “Kill me. Kill me now, please – and be sure to make it quick and painless, pretty please.” 
You finally laugh. It’s a bit choked, a bit strangled, but it instantly has Eddie lowering his hand. 
“I think if we were going to kill each other, Munson, it would have happened hours ago,” you try to tease him, but something about the sentiment comes out far softer than you intended. Like it’s not a joke. Like, in your own odd way, you’re trying to whisper a truth to him – everything has changed for me now. 
“Probably,” he sighs, relaxing a bit and leaning back beside you as he looks to the phone once more and clicks on a song, “Proba-fucking-ly.” 
For the first two songs, there is a distance to be kept between the two of you. You peek at the screen and catch the titles – Cherry Waves and Sextape – and make a mental categorization of which one you enjoy more. You nearly audibly snort at Sextape, but manage to keep your immature humor to yourself. You prefer Cherry Waves, anyways. 
  The songs that follow become a bit of a blur. Because for the first two, the distance existed. You can focus on the guitar and the vocals and the bass drum and everything except the man sitting beside you. But then song three comes on. 
Fucking song three. You don’t catch the name, but it might be your favorite yet. Or you might be biased. 
Because it’s during this third song that something changes. Eddie is no longer content in just leaning back beside you, in letting you consume the new music in a sort of solitude that was impressive to achieve when not actually alone. You first notice his restlessness in the bounce of his knee, shaking beside yours as he finally puts the phone down on the coffee table rather than balanced on his thigh. You don’t comment on it, you let it slide. You faux indifference. But then, the flexing of his hand starts.
It’s odd. Sure, plenty of people mess with their hands in relation to nerves, but you’ve never seen it happen like that before. The slow stretch of him pushing his fingers to their limits before retracting them, bending his knuckles as he tucks the tips in. The veins along the top of his hand popping exceptionally. 
“I’m just good with my fingers.”
I fucking bet he is. 
You curse yourself for the warmth that burns in the pit of your stomach. Focus. You should be focusing on the music, on taking in what he’s sharing with you. 
Not on his hands. Specifically his fingers, and how good they’d feel-
Fucking stop it. Cut it out. No. 
It takes an ungodly amount of willpower for you to look away, but you manage it. Unfortunately, what you don’t manage to do is ignore the bouncing of his leg. You don’t manage to extinguish that burning that he’s begun in you — a fire started from his kindle. 
Impulsive. Impulsive, and a little stupid, and endlessly daring. That’s what it is when you finally reach out a hand to land on his knee midsong. 
The shaking immediately ceases, and you take over the soothing motions as you let your thumb initially rub in arcs against the side of his thigh. With each strum of the guitar that rings out, you let your thumb complete its semicircle motion. With each pounding of drums, you give a gentle squeeze. He doesn’t say a word about it, and neither do you. Especially when he drops his hand over yours, wiggling his fingers between yours with the failure of a casual grace. You try not to smile as you flip your hand and let him properly intertwine them.
Flexing, but this time, it’s to squeeze your palm to his. You still think about those goddamn fingers.
“So, what do you think so far?” Eddie asks after he clears his throat.
“They’re good,” you nod, finding yourself shuffling subconsciously closer to him now that he’s gripping onto your hand, “Really good.” 
“I’m just good with my fingers.”
You know that he’s more than just good. Just like Deftones, you’d dare say he’s really good. 
The song switches, and both of you have scooted close enough to one another that your thighs press together. Shoulder to shoulder, sharing enough space to feel his breath on the side of your bare neck. 
His grip on your hand tightens.
You want the opposite. You suddenly want his hand to detach from yours and to find home on your cheeks, hands on either side of your face before he’s pulling you into him, throwing caution and formality to the wind. You two have already crossed that line; why was it so hard to take that leap once more? 
The song is still playing. You don’t recognize the tinny guitars that are on the loop of repeating the same notes, an echo effect of sorts layered over them. 
It’s just the guitar. And suddenly, the rasps of Eddie’s breaths are something your acutely aware of. Like he’s closer, like he’s letting his head tilt even closer to you. You feel that heat transferring between your biceps that are smashed together, not even thin layers of t-shirt or the sleeve of the crew neck able to stop it. 
It all happens suddenly.
The guitar pauses and Eddie’s hand loosens in yours. Your heart races, and you realize you’re preparing yourself for what he’s doing before he’s even sprung into action. 
Kiss me, the sigh you let out whispers.
It’s answered by the song, and by Eddie. A combination of the two that you can’t differentiate. 
The silence in the song is cut off by whimpers. One from the lead singer on the track, one from Eddie. Both breathy, both shakey, both whispering of the loss of control.
“Fuck it.”
Two words. He says those two words again as his warning before he lets go of your hand and is reaching up, shifting your two bodies impossibly quick as his hands do exactly as you had craved. One on each cheek, and then he does it.
He kisses you.
It is neither kind nor gentle, despite the allusion that it might have been from the way he cradles your cheeks. The callouses on his fingers scrape your cheeks, you can feel every crack in his bottom lip as it slots between your own. It’s easy and quick work, the way your mouths can mold together so effortlessly. Tongues that were once so sharp as they’d spit venomous words at once another now meet and pass over teeth, blurring the lines of where you end and he begins — of where hatred ended and this began. 
Whatever it is, whatever it will be for these last few hours, whatever it will be once the clock runs out, you’re grateful. You, your vinery, your civility — they all scream their prayers of thanks as his hands drop from your cheeks and find your hips. You don’t even process that he’s tugging you onto his lap or that you’re letting him until it’s happened. Your thighs bracket his own hips, and he gives you no time before he’s pressing your full weight into him, hands clawing at you, desperate to keep you close. 
You can’t even hear the song anymore over the roar of your own heart.
“Baby,” he murmurs against your mouth, and you realize now what the price is. 
The price is your sanity. The price is a loss of control, and letting him consume you whole. A small price in the grand scheme of it all.
“I-“ you start a sentence that you have no idea of what the ending would be, but he interrupts with his mouth. The teeth your tongue had once met bite down on your lip and you swear you taste blood, swear you see crimson as he sighs out again into your open mouth. 
His hands guide your hips against his. A steady rhythm, and with only a few passes, you can feel him harden against you. Your pace picks up of your own doing, the friction of your panties and his pajama pants nudging your clit and leaving you breathless. 
What the fuck are we doing?
You should stop it. You should mind the delicate balance you two have been trying to achieve since you first crossed this line. 
You only push down harder on him, only bite down on his lip as he had yours. This time, blood might have honestly been drawn — the hiss that escapes him says it all. 
“You’re going to be the fucking death of me,” he chastises you between kisses, “You want to know what was fucking wrong earlier? You. You are driving me insane, you are driving me straight into the fucking grave.” 
Oh.
Oh.
The way he had leapt up. His nervous energy. The way he had put as much space between the two of you as possible.
“I affect you that much?”
It is not a confident question — you completely pull away from him, leaning back as you breathe it out, hands finding home on his shoulders as you survey him.
He’s being honest. 
His pupils are wide but those brown, doe eyes have softened as they meet your gaze. His chest is heaving, his lips are already bruising pink as they fall apart so casually. 
He’s being honest. 
You affect him, you’re doing this to him — he’s caught up in flames, no sign of salt water in sight. 
“You always do,” he says, “Always have. Probably always will.” 
Your grip on his shoulders tighten. 
I could never hate you. 
How blind you had been. How absolutely, blissfully unaware you had been functioning all these months. 
A hand trails from its grip on his shoulders, fingers slipping over his bare collar bone, “What do you mea-“ 
You don’t get to finish the question or dig any deeper into the revelation. The music both of you had long since abandoned has been replaced by the ringing of your phone.
Eddie’s eyes immediately pinch shut, face twisting with irritation. You can’t tell if he’s more annoyed at the interruption due to whatever breakthrough you two were on the precipice of, or because he’s still painfully hard beneath you. But he quickly wraps one arm around your waist, tugging your torso flush to his as he leans forward quickly and reaches out to grab your phone. 
“Oh, what the fuck,” he huffs once his eyes are open again and he’s looking at your phone screen.
Your face has been pressed into the crook of his neck due to the current position and way he’s tightly holding you to him. You have no clue who it is, but you have five decent guesses to throw out. 
He answers for you. Sharply and bitterly, he snaps out a, “What do you want, Harrington?” 
Steve. One of the five guesses. Go figure.
“Yes, we’re fucking alive,” Eddie holds no patience for your friend, all the softness he’d held for you gone save for the stroke of his thumb against the bare small of your back, “We were-“ 
A pause. You wonder for a second if he is going to admit it. If right here, right now, he would confess to your friends what has happened. How he could never hate you, how you drive him insane, how by nothing changing that everything has changed.
“Sleeping.” 
An answer to your question. You hate your disappointment, and bite it down with vengeance. 
You can faintly hear Steve’s voice over the phone, not quite as trilling or pitched as Nancy’s or Robin’s. Eddie’s annoyance still rolls off of him in waves, and you imagine that you’d catch him rolling his eyes along with his little huffs of air if you were to finally lift your head from his neck. But you’re selfish, and his arm is still around you waist as it presses you tight to his chest, so you indulge yourself. You dig your nose deeper against the junction of his neck, you take in his lingering cologne and let the stray curls tickle your cheeks. 
You should have known he wouldn’t admit it.
“Okay, okay,” Eddie grumbles into the phone, barely getting out the repetitive word before his breath hitches as you pucker your lips against the skin you’ve been burrowing into. It’s only a chaste kiss, but it has its desired effect, “Okay, Harrington. We’ll send a fucking photo. You done?”
Then it hits you. A fun game, a distraction from your disappoint and a way to crawl under his skin all in one. You fight hard not to let a smile spread at the risk of him feeling it against his neck as you take a deep breath in through your nose, noticing the way his shoulder nearly reflexively lifts slightly as if it tickles, because you’re puckering your lips again.
The second chaste kiss is testing the waters. He doesn’t react. And so you go forth with your plan, mouth falling open, teeth grazing his jugular.
He reacts microscopically. His chest halts movement.
It’s not enough for you.
So you suck. Hard. Puckered lips and a vendetta to prove, you let your teeth bite at the skin that sucks into your mouth. 
That does the trick.
“O-Okay!” he yelps out in surprise, his hand bruising as he grips you harder. He tries to pull his neck back from you, but his hand only presses you down onto his lap and you feel his dick twitch beneath his thin pants, “Christ, Harrington. We fucking get it. We’ll send a photo. And we won’t sleep another wink, so bite me,“ he pants out as you move to the spot beneath his ear, finding where his jaw connects to his throat, repeating the process and doing exactly as he had told Steve. His hips buck up into you, “Okay, I’m hanging up now, Harrington. Bye.” 
You’re grinning wildly against his ear as he tosses your phone carelessly somewhere on the couch — or maybe the floor, you couldn’t tell at this point — before he’s flipping you down onto your back on the couch and hovering over you.
Your head falls back instinctually, leaving your neck open for him to begin an assault of kisses.
“Are-“ A kiss. “You-“ A bite. “Fucking-“ A soothing lathe of tongue over the bite. “Kidding-“ A harsh suck. “Me.”
You writhe beneath him, but he’s pressing his entire weight down onto you, hips slotted between yours and one hand  pinning both your wrists to the cushion above as the other stays glued to your waist. 
“Did you think that was funny?” he breathes out against you, letting the tip of his nose barely graze over the base of your throat, “Doing that shit while I was trying to talk Harrington down from that damn ledge?” 
“Why was he on the ledge to begin with?” you breathily question, trying to move your hands from his grasp, the urge to run your fingers through his curls growing. He only tightens his hold.
“Apparently,” he pauses and presses a quick kiss at the edge of the sweatshirt collar, looking up at you through his bangs and lashes, “He had texted, and we didn’t respond. Photos are back in demand.” 
“We’re quite the commodity,” you try to joke, avoiding his gaze. Trying to avoid the softness buried deep inside there, all soft and melted in shades of brown, “We should start charging them.” 
“We are charging them, technically,” he snorts, finally letting go of your wrists and leveling his face above yours.
Right. You keep forgetting the promise of a cash prize if you make it out of this alive. 
Alive, not unscathed. 
You’re already picturing that cash as blood money, some pathetic trophy that won’t even begin to cover the irreversible scars that will be left behind. All the hurt, all the fights, all the realizations — no amount of promised money can erase them.
You start to consider what could erase them, but you stop yourself when you realize that that admittance is too heavy. 
He’s here. The weight of him is pressing into you, the smell of him is encasing you, and the stare of his big brown eyes is locking you in. You have him. For a few more hours, you have him.
The wounds can wait. The time to heal and scar over will come later.
“I guess they are, huh?” you laugh when you realize you’ve gone too long without replying. 
The stare turns curious. Still melted chocolate, still deathly soft for you, but curious all the same. “Yeah. Yeah, they are.” 
You’re about to retreat into your own head and consider what he might do with his share of the cash, but that voice in your mind whispers once more.
He’s here. You have him. Just ask him.
“What are you doing with your money?” you blurt out. 
He chuckles and shakes his head, curls falling over his shoulders and creating a curtain as he continues to balance his weight on his forearms settled on each side of your head, still hovering over you.
You should probably comment on that. Make a snide remark about it. Shove him off.
You don’t.
“Is that really want you’d like to talk about right now?” 
Right, the weight of his hips as he rolls them gently into you reminds you of what the two of you had been doing before the phone call. The boundaries you’d hopped right over, all the lines you two had been in the process of crossing.
The affect you have on him.
Your stomach twists and suddenly your legs fall open wider to welcome him in, only to wrap them up around his waist. He lets you, lets you pull him right in until your chests are flush to each other. The only thing separating your skin from his is this damn sweatshirt. 
“I… Maybe,” you force out just before his lips capture yours. It’s not as urgent as when he’d pulled you in for a kiss to Deftones, but it’s still enough to shatter every bone in your body before melding them all back together into something new, something different.
Something changed. 
Eddie smiles, and it’s almost shyly. “Maybe?”
You hum, but it’s cut off, caught in your throat with another roll of Eddie’s hips. 
“Okay. Let’s talk about it then, sweetheart.” 
Another roll of his hips, and you lift your own to meet the thrust this time, trying to catch him against you in a way for reprieve. You can feel the wet patch gathering on your panties, your thighs clenching onto his hips harder. 
“What ever shall I do with my money?” he pretends to ponder, eyes shooting up to look away from you in faux contemplation. 
As he does it, one of his hands wander over your sternum, dancing above the fabric of the borrowed clothes. 
“Maybe I’ll buy a new bike,” he muses, the hand wandering lower, tracing a steady line down your abdomen, “Maybe I’ll get myself a new guitar.” 
His hand has reached the hem of the sweatshirt, slips beneath it and plays with the edge of your panties. 
Your mouth will be your damnation as you snipe back, “Or maybe you can buy yourself a whole collection of playboys, filled with plenty of models who definitely don’t look like someone you claim to hate.” 
His hand retracts immediately, and you can’t help but begin to giggle.
“Wait, wait, wait,” you start to gasp out when he lifts away from you, reaching out to grab onto him. 
He’s fast, but your hands are quicker. You wrap them around the back of his neck and tug him into you, only for him to continue to lift himself up and bring you with him as well this time. 
You resemble a koala, and can only imagine what the scene looks like to an outsider. 
“Eddie!” you practically squeal, and can feel the vibrations of his own laughter as he sits up on his knees, you still clinging to him.
His arms wrap around you and you lean back, catching that mischievous glint in his eyes. It breaks through the softness, burns brightly in your chest as your laughter fades into soft breaths that hit his freckled cheeks.
You stare at each other for a moment, a tangle of limbs and unspoken words. His earlier admission isn’t forgotten, the lines crossed all painted in red now.
He’s here. You have him, for now. 
You can only imagine the claw marks you will be leaving behind when the clock strikes twenty four hours, and you’re forced to leave him and this behind. 
“You, sweetheart,” he finally breaks the silence with gentle smirk, “are a certified boner killer.” 
You don’t miss a beat, reaching down between you two, hand cupping his still prominent erection, “You sure about that?” 
He only groans in response, and in your following cackles, your hold on him slips. 
He could have let you fall back roughly on the couch, especially given his distraction with fighting his ever growing smirk. He could have let you smack your head back on the cushion and let you deal with the dull ache that would have followed. He could have, he could have, he could have.
He doesn’t. 
He guides you back with his arms still tight around you. Makes sure that you land softly against the worn plush. Takes his time removing his grip on you before he’s standing up from the couch.
You lay back, so sincerely content as you let out a final breath of a laugh and watch him shake his head in amusement as he turns to leave. 
“Where are you going?” if it weren’t for the residual giddiness of the moment, you’d have been embarrassed by the clinginess that had threaded its way into your tone.
“The bathroom,” he answers without hesitation, back facing you as he starts down the short hall.
You call after him, “Okay. Don’t take too long this time!” 
Even as his laughter echoes faintly, you know you still have him. For now.
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freedomfireflies · 7 months
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Always*
Summary: The fifth and final part to 404*
The one with car crashes and closet sex.
Word Count: 4.3k
*Contains Mature and Explicit content! Please only consume what you feel comfortable with!💞You are so much more important!*
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Arrogant Twat: Playing hooky, that’s not like you
Arrogant Twat: You’re not that cool
Arrogant Twat: I can see you reading my messages you know
Arrogant Twat: So if you’re ignoring me, it’s not working
Arrogant Twat: …okay seriously this is really fucking childish, are you really not gonna come to work just because I won’t fuck you?
Arrogant Twat: It’s been three days, Princess, you can’t hide from me forever
You: You are so fucking annoying, I am not hiding from you, I’m SICK
You: This may come as a surprise, but my world does not revolve around you or your cock
You: So if you don’t mind, I need to go throw up
Tossing your phone down onto the bed, you rush into the bathroom to grasp onto the sink and brace yourself over the porcelain. Silently willing your body to comply, to keep the fluids down. You don’t want to be sick, but thinking about Harry always tends to make you.
You smirk to yourself at the joke before running your hands under the cold stream of water to gently rinse off your face. Needing to feel something cool against your feverish skin before you slink back to bed.
Truth be told, you don’t mind the break from work. And from Harry, specifically. Sure, you understand why he ended things. And you aren’t exactly upset about it, seeing as he wasn’t really that great of company to keep.
But he’s angry. You know he’s angry, and that’s why he claimed he wanted to stop. And you feel guilty over having pushed him there, you do. After all, you knew better. You two don’t talk about anything personal. You don’t ask questions, you don’t pry. You don’t show any sort of emotion or understanding. 
You broke the one rule. And truthfully, you aren’t quite sure how to face him now.
Overcome with fatigue, you slump back down onto your bed, and disappear beneath the covers. Pulling them up to your chin as a shiver rolls down your sweaty skin, all the way to your fuzzy sock-covered toes. 
You try to watch some television to get your mind off the pain and congestion but find yourself growing sleepier with each quippy remark from Chandler Bing.
And before you know it, you’re out like a light.
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The sharp chime of your cellphone is what wakes you. Pulling you from a rather odd dream as you groggily roll over and attempt to find the noise. 
It’s a text message, followed shortly after by another. And once you manage to sit up and rub the sandman from your eyes, you see who it’s from.
Arrogant Twat: Open your door
Arrogant Twat: And hurry up, it’s fucking freezing out here
Curious, and a tad startled, you glance toward your bedroom door, almost as if expecting to see him.
He can’t possibly be outside of your apartment building right now. He has no idea where you live, nor would he ever have any desire to be here. This has to be some sort of prank. He’ll get you to walk outside into the freezing night air only to realize he’s nowhere to be found.
That is the Harry you know.
Arrogant Twat: For the love of God, Tinkerbell, open the fucking door before I freeze my ass off
With a huff (and a cough), you fling your covers back and pad over to your window, glancing down into the street.
And there he is, a dark shadowy figure lurking on the steps to your building, angrily glaring at his cellphone.
You feel your heart start to pound, overcome with confusion and intrigue. You don’t understand why he might be here or what he could possibly want so late at night. You’re tempted to send him away, or pretend he has the wrong address.
But you can’t deny that you’re curious as to what he might want or what he’ll say. Especially after the way things ended. Perhaps he’s merely here to catch you up on what you’ve missed with the project. Or maybe he just wants to complain in person.
Either way, you slip on some pajama shorts and a large, oversized sweatshirt for comfort, and head for the door. 
With a deep breath, you buzz him in, and wait anxiously as the sound of steps echoes through the stairwell and between the halls. 
No matter what happens, you’ll stand your ground. You don’t have the energy to fight him today. If he’s coming into your home, he’ll play by your rules.
There’s a knock on the door. Sharp and precise as you exhale shakily and step closer. Fingers curling around the doorknob before you swing it back and come face to face with the troublemaker himself.
He stands in the doorframe, a dark hoodie pulled over his head, and glasses perched on the bridge of his nose. 
In his right hand, he holds a brown bag, allowing it to dangle casually at his side while his eyes rake up and down your figure.
“Shit, you look terrible,” he snorts, pressing his shoulder against the entryway. “Worse than usual, I mean.”
Your expression falls, a glare beginning to form. “Well, this was fun. Buh-bye now,” you huff, already beginning to shut the door in his face.
However, he’s quick to outstretch his hand and smack his palm against the wood, keeping it open. “Okay, all right. Geez, it was just a joke. D’ya lose your sense of humor or something?”
“No, that just wasn’t funny,” you retort, but allow the door to stay ajar. “What do you want?”
He lifts the bag into the air and shakes it once. “Brought you soup.”
You blink. “You…what? Why?”
He shrugs once. “Cause you’re sick,” he says, now brushing past you to make his way into your living room. “And I’m nice.”
“Uh…no,” you nearly scoff, turning around to watch him flop down onto your sofa. “You are anything but nice to me, and you know it.”
“Well, I’m being nice today.”
“Why?”
“Why?”
“Yeah, why? Is it poisoned or something?”
You catch his wry smile as he begins to unpack the items and set them onto your coffee table. “Guess there’s only one way to find out, yeah?”
Hesitantly, you shut the door, and follow after him. Cautious of his intentions but drawn to the smell of the delicious food.
He hands you a bowl and some cutlery – which you take rather tentatively – before he straightens up and stares at you. “Are you gonna sit down?”
“I don’t know,” you admit, eyeing the only spot available beside him on the couch. “Are you still gonna be an asshole?”
“Probably.”
You huff but catch yourself smirking. “Fine, but scoot over.”
With an amused exhale of his own, he does as instructed, moving toward the edge of the sofa to make room before sitting down as well.
 Your small apartment fills with a rather uncomfortable quiet as the two of you begin to dig into your food. The silence accompanied by faint slurps and sips that almost make you smile.
And it feels weird to be here with him like this. Relaxing on the couch, eating some soup like you don’t despise each other.
Perhaps you’d even enjoy his company under any other circumstance. 
Clearing your throat, you angle your body toward his, studying his profile as his eyebrow raises. “Why are you here? Really?”
He shifts in your direction as well, grinning deviously from behind his takeout container. “Told you, I’m being nice—”
“Wrong. You’re never nice. Besides, you just accused me of hiding from you, so I don’t exactly think we’re on the best of terms.”
This makes his amusement fade, a subtle frown beginning to form as he shrugs one shoulder up in a nonchalant manner. “I don’t know. I guess it’s an apology.”
“For what?”
“For saying that,” he admits, almost quietly. Avoiding your eye as he stares at his noodles. “And maybe I kind of thought you were lying and wanted to see for myself.”
“Would you like me to vomit for you? Will that prove I’m actually unwell?”
He smiles again. “Nah, I’m good—”
“Really, it’s no trouble. I’ll do it right now, all over your lap—”
“All right,” he groans, leaning back with a crinkled nose. “Ew. No. I believe you, Princess. Fuck’s sake.”
Satisfied, you nod once. “Great. Now, onto my next question. How the hell did you get my address?”
“How do you think?” His expression is mischievous. “Got it from your file.”
“What? Why do you have access to my file?”
“Cause Prescott’s security system is way too easy to hack,” he says simply. “And I knew you’d never tell me.”
“Right. Because we don’t do that.”
“We don’t,” he agrees. “But we’re not fucking anymore, so it’s fine.”
“Oh, is it?”
“Yeah.”
“And how exactly does that work?”
“Because,” he begins, setting his things down on the coffee table, “if we’re not fucking, that means there’s no chance of you getting all clingy and attached.”
Your eyes narrow. “Uh-huh.”
“Which means we can hang out without you falling for me,” he finishes, rather smugly. “So it’s fine.”
“Just because we aren’t fucking doesn’t mean we’re friends,” you argue. “I still hate you.”
“I know. I hate you, too.”
Yet for some reason, you both smile.
“Now what’s the real reason?” you urge, nodding your chin at him. “Honestly. Why are you really here?”
He takes a beat to mull this over, standing from the sofa to collect his trash and take it to your kitchen. “Told you,” he finally says before tossing away his things. “You’re sick, and I felt bad.”
“Is that all?”
Another long pause settles between you as he readjusts the hood over his curls and saunters over to your window seat. “I didn’t want you to be hiding from me,” he admits as he slumps down, eyes flicking out into the dark night. “So I wanted to make sure we were good.”
You study him silently, taking in the way his hands disappear into the large pocket on his abdomen. “Yeah, we’re good,” you quietly reply.
He nods once but keeps his attention on the city. “Good. Cause you don’t have to hide, you know. We’re fine.”
“Yeah, I know. I just said that.”
His body lifts and falls with a small chuckle before he props his legs up onto the cushions and tosses his arms over his knees. “Well, you seemed pissed.”
“Well, I wasn’t the one that threw a hissy fit and fled from the car,” you retort. “In fact, I’m the one that politely agreed and let you go.”
“Right, but you were pissy about it. I could tell.”
“You are so full of shit.”
He laughs again. “I just don’t want you to be mad at me.”
“Oh, I am. But not for that.”
He looks over. “Yeah?”
“Yeah. You’re annoying, and you’re rude, and you’re so fucking pretentious,” you list, fighting a grin. “But you have a right to keep things to yourself, and I shouldn’t have asked. So…I’m sorry.”
He nods once, as if acknowledging the apology before returning his gaze to the window. “S’fine.”
Another lull drifts into the conversation, minutes passing by before you notice his expression shift.
“It’s not you,” he murmurs, and your eyebrows lift.
“What?”
He shifts a bit before clearing his throat. “It’s not you, I just…I don’t talk about it. Or…her.”
Her. 
The first piece to the rather large puzzle sitting before you, and you feel your breath catch as you await the rest.
You notice the way he hesitates. The reflection of the night sky in his glasses. The nervous tapping of his fingers.
“Cause if I don’t talk about it, then I don’t have to think about it,” he whispers. “And if I don’t think about, then I don’t feel like putting my fucking fist through a wall, you know?”
“I know,” you answer quietly. “You don’t have to, it’s okay.”
He snorts to himself, leaning forward. “She never should have been in that fucking car. I was supposed to drive her. She was supposed to be with me.”
And even without much context, you feel your stomach wrench, already anticipating what might have happened.
“But she was late,” he says. And it’s angry, the way he speaks. Resentful. “She was out with her friends, and she was late to meet me, and I had shit to do. So I told her. I told her I couldn’t take her to the fucking party she wanted to go to. Because I didn’t want to be out all fucking night. I wanted to get my shit done and go to bed.”
You feel your throat run dry, tears beginning to form as you watch him recall the memory.
“I told her to get an Uber,” he continues, aggravated at first before it settles into something soft and somber. “I made her get into that car, and I watched her go. And I didn’t fucking care. Because I wanted to stay home, so I made her go by herself, and it fucking…and she didn’t…”
Your feet desperately want to carry you to him. To provide him some sort of comfort as he keeps his glare on the city horizon.
But you stay seated on the sofa, waiting for whatever he might offer next as he takes a deep breath.
“And she was just gone,” he murmurs, the air in the room shifting instantly. “She was fucking gone not even an hour later.”
The first drop slips down your cheek before you can wipe it away.
He exhales an amused laugh, the corner of his mouth twitching up. “And I always think how funny it is that the last thing she ever said to me was, ‘Sleep well, H.’ And I haven’t slept well since.”
Now, he looks to you. Studying you almost sadly as you sit in wait.
“And then there was you,” he says. “You, and your shitty ass jokes, and your cocky little grin. You were everywhere. Every day. Sitting across from me, asking if I wanted to split a fucking everything bagel.”
You’re almost tempted to smile, but the truth of what he’s saying cuts too deep.
“And I hated it,” he admits, eyes flicking between yours. “I fucking hated it because you made me forget. Whenever I would talk to you, I would forget. I would just stare at you as you rambled on and on about the algorithm and the fucking API, and I wouldn’t think about her, and I’d forget how fucking angry I was.”
He smiles almost wryly, making your insides twist.
“And I didn’t want to forget,” he tells you. “I wanted to be angry. I wanted to punish myself for what I’d done. Because I didn’t deserve to forget. I didn’t deserve to be happy. Especially with you.”
You sit up, wrestling with the temptation to argue, but he’s already looking back out the window.
“So, yeah, maybe hating you was easier. And maybe fucking you was selfish, but it felt like the only choice. Because sex is just sex. And if I kept you at a distance – at least in some ways – I wouldn’t have to lose you, too.”
 You stand and make your way for the window seat, settling in front of him as he turns to watch you. He looks like he wants to roll his eyes, perhaps in an attempt to avoid your pity, but you lean forward, nonetheless.
“You know it’s not your fault, right?” you whisper, ignoring his amused expression. “You don’t deserve to be punished for something you couldn’t control.”
He smirks, but you can see the hint of sadness written between the lines of his face. “Thanks, Dr. Phil. I’ll keep that in mind.”
But you don’t let him tease his way out of this, instead settling your hands atop his knees to recapture his attention. “I’m serious, Harry. I know she wouldn’t blame you. How can you blame yourself?”
His smug grin falters for half a second. “Because there’s no one else to blame.”
A lump lodges in your throat as you scoot a bit closer. “Exactly. It was an accident. Unfair and uncontrollable. But it was never your fault. It was never your burden to carry.”
He leans his head back against the wall, but his attention never leaves you. Almost as though he’s afraid to look away. 
“You can hate me,” you tell him. “I don’t mind that. Hating you is easier for me, too. But you can’t punish yourself for this. You can’t keep yourself from being happy. Not when you deserve it more than anybody I know.”
And maybe this is the first time you’ve ever really understood him. The first time you’ve felt truly connected to the man before you – even more so than when he was inside of you.
Because suddenly, things don’t feel so heavy. The world doesn’t seem so dark. And maybe, just maybe…he’s not so bad.
He drops his legs and sits up to reach for you. A large palm slipping around the back of your neck while you suck in a quiet breath and lean away.
“No,” you whisper, making his eyebrows raise. “I’m sick.”
He laughs, almost as though enchanted by your response. That charming dimple reemerging. “I don’t care.”
“Well you should,” you argue. “Seriously, it’s gross over here. There’s snot and I’ve been coughing all day—”
“Tink,” he murmurs, moving closer, attention dropping to your lips. “Stop talking.”
So…you do.
You let his mouth press to yours, settling into the feel of his touch. Something you weren’t sure you’d ever get to feel again. And despite everything else…you’re content.
He kisses your top lip. Your bottom lip. Steals a breath right from your lungs before nudging his nose with yours. “I still hate you.”
Your fingers tangle into the dark hoodie on his chest. “Yeah. I hate you, too.”
He smiles.
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You aren’t sure what to expect come Monday morning. After all, you’re never sure what to expect with Harry.
You left things…friendly but undecided. As far as you know, nothing has changed. Harry is still the arrogant twat you’re forced to tolerate, and maybe that’s all he’ll ever be.
But maybe…you’re okay with that.
If you never fuck him again, perhaps that’s not the worst thing. Becoming his frenemy is decidedly less exhausting than being anything else. And you suppose you don’t want much more than that. At least not right now. You’re happy to hate him for as long as he’ll let you.
But you aren’t sure how he’ll feel about his admission in the light of day. Maybe he’ll regret sharing something so personal. Maybe he’ll resent you for knowing it. Maybe he’ll request the two of you never speak again.
Lucas does his best to engage in small talk with you as you anxiously await Harry’s arrival. Politely ignoring the way you continue to check your watch and glance toward his desk. 
In fact, you eventually become so engrossed in the conversation with the friendly newcomer that you miss that aforementioned ball of thunder striding through the lab.
Nothing seems out of the ordinary. He throws his things down and slouches into his chair to begin working. Not bothering with a greeting or even a look of acknowledgement. 
Truth be told, you aren’t sure whether to be relieved or disappointed.
And then the lunch hour begins. You assume he’ll disappear to the cafeteria as usual to grab a sandwich before returning to hide himself away in the lab.
Yet today is different. Today he stands up, turns around, and steps up to where you’re sitting.
Before you can even turn around, he dips down, and whispers, “Supply closet. Five minutes.”
With that, he’s gone. Slipping between the computers and desks before disappearing into the hallway as a smile stretches across your face.
After anxiously counting the seconds, you begin to follow. Double checking to make sure no one pays you any mind. 
Once you’re satisfied, you make your way to the closet, and knock twice.
The door swings open, and you barely get the chance to offer a greeting before he’s tugging you inside, flinging the door shut, and pushing you up against it.
 His lips find yours and it’s anxious. His kisses are desperate and rushed but so fucking addictive. 
His hands are on your waist while yours disappear into his hair. His glasses are nudged out of place but neither of you care to stop and fix them. Instead groaning eagerly as he sucks on your tongue.
His hips press to yours, the subtle but familiar bulge hard against your thigh as you drop your head back and whimper. Anxiously pleading with him through a pointed look.
The flick of the button on your jeans is fast and practiced. The material pooling around your ankles while he works to tug his own pants down. 
Two fingers hook onto the crotch of your panties to pull them aside before he slides the long digits through. Feeling just how frantic you really are. 
He kisses you again as he slides them inside, curling and pumping just so. Smirking when he hears your arousal echo between the walls.
Nipping at your bottom lip, he whispers, “This doesn’t change anything. I still hate you.”
Sighing contently at the way his thumb massages your clit, you say, “Good. I hate you, too.”
He snorts. “Sure, Princess. Is that why you’re so fucking wet?”
To accentuate his point, he thrusts to the knuckle, stroking a particular spot that makes your toes curl and your eyes roll back.
“S’fucking pathetic,” he murmurs, glancing down, “how easy it is to play with you. Don’t have to do anything, do I? Just have to tease you a little and you’ll soak my fucking hand.”
Your fingers curl into his shirt, either as an act of defiance or out of need for stability. You aren’t sure.
“Cause you like it, don’t you?” he continues, moving his kisses to your neck. “Gets you off to be insulated. Degraded. Get all wet and squirmy at the thought of me putting you in your place, yeah?”
You don’t want to agree with him, but you both know he’s right. Even now, the cold cadence in which he speaks makes your legs shake. 
“Yeah,” he answers for you in a soft but smug hum. “Know you do. Know you just wanna be put on your knees. Where you belong.”
With this thought, he pulls his fingers from your pussy, leaving you to wilt while he tugs his cock out.
There’s not much care as he swiftly and almost angrily tugs your leg up and throws it around his hip. He offers no words of reassurance or looks of encouragement while the tip drags through your folds before slowly disappearing into your cunt.
He ignores your strangled inhale, forehead finding yours as he grits, “Maybe I should do that next. Wrap your pretty ponytail around my fist while I fuck your throat.”
Your lashes flutter shut, nails scraping down his arms. 
“Bet you’d like that, wouldn’t you, Tink?” He pauses for only a moment to let you adjust. “Like it when I make tears run down your face, yeah?”
However, you can’t offer him any reply. Instead focusing on the familiar ache that accompanies the stretch of his large size. 
He pushes in a bit more, wary of your reaction, but overcome with pleasure at the way you take him. “You do,” he decides, that smile returning. “Can feel your little pussy clenching around me. Is that what you want, Princess? Want me to be mean to you?”
Truth be told, you suppose it is. Anything else wouldn’t feel right.
His hand raises to your throat, fingers curling around the delicate and soft skin of your neck before he squeezes once. Keeping your head pressed against the door.
“Take me,” he murmurs harshly before burying himself all the way. Ignoring your gasps and whines. “Fucking take me, Tink. Just like that. S’a good fucking girl. Always behave so well for me, hm? Just for me. Nobody else.”
He sets a slow but hard pace. Looking down at where his cock disappears into your pussy with a dazed look in his eye.
“Do you think about him, Princess?” he asks you next, giving your throat another squeeze. “D’ya think about your precious fucking Lucas when I fuck you? Or do you think about him when you’re all alone? Trying to get yourself off?”
Your mouth opens, ready to reply, but all that follows his remark is a desolate and strained whimper. 
“Or do you think about me?” His lips ghost along the tender skin below your ear. Breathing softly before kissing the spot sweetly. A stark contrast to the vile way he speaks. “Think about how good I am to you…how I take care of you. Picture my hands, my voice, my fucking cock.”
And he’s right. In every fantasy, you see his face, first and foremost. Whisper his name into the air of your room as your fingers curl into your cunt. 
It’s always him.
“Say it,” he murmurs now, offering another gentle kiss to your neck. “Tell me I’m the only one. Fucking tell me I’m the only one you cum for.”
Your fingernails move to scrape down his scalp, tangling in his soft curls as you subtly keep him in your arms. 
You’re not too surprised by this request. Even if the two of you might never be anything more than friends, you imagine he needs to know. He needs to hear that even after everything, you still choose him.
You’re tempted to taunt him with a quippy retort. Egg him on, tell him he’s nothing compared to your vibrator. 
Yet you find yourself whispering, “Only you, Har. Only ever you.”
For a moment, he stills. As if overcome by the words, the admission.
You pull him further into your embrace. “Always you.”
With a smirk, he leans back just far enough to meet your eye. 
And you both smile.
“That’s my fucking girl.”
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🥹 I can't believe we've made it to the end of the main series!!! No they're not technically together right now, BUT!!! There will be extras and who knows what they might get up to later ALSFJEFD
Thank you so much to everyone for reading and being so kind, I appreciate you all more than you know!!! You have my entire heart to heaven and back!!!! AND TINK, HARRY, AND I WILL SEE YOU AGAIN VERY SOON!! Specifically for the Halloween extra HAHAHA 😭♥️♥️
Next Part:
~ A-Mazing* (Halloween Extra)
Previous Part:
~ Jealous* (Pt. 4)
~ Full 404 Masterlist
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Taglist: @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @keepdrivingkisses @swiftmendeshoran @tiredinwinter @straightontilmornin @justlemmeadoreyou @harrysdaydreams @tiaamberxx @peterparker1sgf @myfavfanficsever @littlenatilda @vamprry @fdl305 @tchalametishot @ssaama @indierockgirrl @likeapplejuicenpeach @vane28282 @lukesaprince @closureesny @lc-fics @0nlythrowharrybeaux @daphnesutton @love-letters-to-uranus @kirstiea05 @lovrave @princessprongs @nuggetdean @storyschanging
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welldonebeca · 3 months
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Glitter and Goo (I)
Summary: When you have to go on a mission to a different planet together, Bucky is hit by a mating ritual flower, and some feelings you two have been hiding come up. AKA: It’s a sex pollen fic with a side of breeding kink. WC: 1k words Warnings: Tension. Romantic tension.
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Masterlist
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You watched the door of the ship nervously as Bucky ran up, keeping your distance as he practically barked at you in the COM system to do.
"Are you sure you're alright?" you insisted as he walked past you, sniffing, a little irritated on the nose.
What was that smell?
"I'm fine," he grunted. "I just need to clean up."
You hesitated a bit. The two of you were alone in that mission, to find some special element on a different planet.
"Did you get it?" you asked him, crossing your arms.
Bucky walked into the isolated decontamination shower.
"I did," he called from inside. "It's in my pocket."
You walked near the door, trying not to look inside.
"Get me a ziplock bag," he commanded.
"Are you sure you are alright?" you insisted. "Bucky, if it sprayed on you-"
He didn't even let you finish.
"I'll be fine," he snapped. "Just get me the ziplock bag!"
You stood stiffly, surprised by the harsh words.
Now, that wasn't like Bucky.
He sighed on the other side.
"Sorry," he spoke quickly. "I'm just... I want to wash this off of me."
You walked to the side, taking some of the ziplock bags you had.
"What happened?" you asked him, showing the empty ziplock to him.
The door opened slightly, and he pulled it from your hand quickly, closing the door again.
"Fucking flower exploded in front of me when I was kneeling," Bucky explained. "There's powder and goo everywhere. But I'm alright, really. Just... let me shower."
You pressed your lips together, but kept quiet, not wanting to fight with him and have a long, awkward trip back home. It was just the two of you for two fucking days.
"Do you want me to get you a change of clothes?" you offered.
This wasn't your shared bathroom, it was a fucking decontamination shower.
Bucky sighed.
"Yeah," he decided. "Please."
You did, placing it down in the exit and putting your protection equipment before taking his clothes and the element.
His jacket was covered in some pink shimmery dust, as he had just gotten in the way of a glitter bomb.
You took some of it too, putting it in your database, along with some of the goo, though most of it seemed to have dried already. The best-case scenario was that nothing would happen, but it was best to be safe.
"Friday?" you called. "Can you send a copy of these to HQ too? Maybe someone knows what they are."
"Yes, ma'am," the system answered back.
By the time you were done and back, Bucky had left the decontamination shower, and looked very grumpy.
"Hey," you stopped in front of him, still a little hesitant. "Doing alright?"
He glanced up at you, eyes lingering on your chest before moving to your face, scrubbing his metal arm.
"I'll have to get someone to look into my arm," he told you. "I don't know if something got between the plates."
You tilted your head, surprised.
"I thought it was self-cleaning," you noted. "Like... a fancy self-cleaning oven, of sorts."
His lips curled in a tiny smile at your joke.
"Most of the time," he confirmed. "But I never had alien pollen and goo on it before."
You shrugged, amused.
"Well, good luck," you wished him. "I sent that stuff to the database, just to be sure."
He hummed a bit in confirmation, and you left him alone, going to the food supply to fix dinner for you two.
"Bucky?" you called. "Why didn't you tell me they packed us lemons?"
Bucky had been the one to deal with the food on the way up, more used to making food in a ship than you'd ever been.
You looked back at the lack of answer and walked back to where you'd left him, finding him resting back on the wall, looking a little loopy.
"Bucky?" you called.
He jumped, surprised, though his eyes were still heavy.
"Hi," he gasped back. "Sorry, what?"
"Lemons," you told him. "You didn't tell me we had them. I can make lemonade."
Bucky took his hand to his nose, pinching in.
"I'm not hungry," he told you. "Maybe just... I don't know. Squeeze one for yourself?"
You shifted on your feet.
"Are you alright?"
Bucky rubbed his eye.
"Yeah," he waved you a dismissive hand.
"Maybe you should have a nap?" you suggested. "Did you sleep since we left?"
He moved slowly, shaking his head.
"Gotta make sure you're safe," he mumbled. "We're in space."
You shook your head.
Bucky was so protective, and it was cute, but it worried you a bit. You were a scientist, not an agent or an Avenger, like him, but it didn't mean you couldn't protect yourself. You worked for SHIELD! Being able to protect yourself was probably the most important thing after being good at your job.
"Well, we can't be more alone," you assured him. "And the ship is very good at protecting anyone who is inside."
He scoffed, but you reached for him anyway, pulling him.
"Come on," you told him. "Bedtime for you."
He grunted but followed you quietly as you guided him down to your shared dorm, sitting him on his bed - the bigger one, large enough to fit his massive body.
"Don't want to leave you alone," he fell back, hand holding yours closely.
You squeezed his hand and he took it closer to his face, nosing your skin.
"I'll be alright," you assured him. "Don't worry."
But Bucky didn't let you go, holding you with such firmness you couldn't help but focus a little too much on it.
His lips brushed against the back of your hand as his eyes closed, mumbling something so low you couldn't quite understand the words.
He dozed, and when you tried to move, he just held you in place.
You sighed, and reached for your bed, taking your pillow and sneaking it to his side. It was weird, maybe, but when you put it near his face, he sought it with his nose, sniffing it and moving closer and grabbing it, finally letting you go.
Bucky nuzzled your pillow happily, holding it in a tight grip as he turned to his side, and it awakened something in you, imagining how it would feel to be the one he was squeezing so closely like that.
Still, you stood up, shaking some wisdom into yourself and walking out, closing the door.
He needed to rest.
“Glitter and Goo” was first posted on my Patreon on April 2023. To read it now, subscribe to my page, it’s just $2 a month and I post 6x a week.
. . .
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Glitter and Goo: @art2emily
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jymwahuwu · 18 days
Note
Hello. God has spoken to me personally, and he commanded me to spread the word of promoted Aventurine and humiliated reader going on a business trip to Pentacony and Sunday offers you a new job.
God wants everyone to really think about the possibilities. Your treatment is bad enough in the office, what will Aventurine do to you when he knows there's no witnesses? Your day to day life is now completely in his hands. What embarrassing thing were you forced to do that made Sunday find out about your situation in the first place? How does Aventurine react to Sunday requesting to speak to you in private? Imagine trying to come up with excuses when Aventurine hounds you for information the moment he gets his hands on you again. How does he react to you turning in your two weeks notice, and how painful are those two weeks? What sort of job does Sunday want you to do for him? God nearly came just thinking about all the potential for insane sex.
Anyways, God said you're an excellent writer and remember to take care of yourself because you deserve it <3
-HST
Thank you <3!! I'll have a good rest, watching new videos today, inspiration struck me… He will make your resignation a joke 😽🙈 You think you can get rid of him like this?
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(This is about the reader who framed Aventurine and was demoted now!! If you don’t like to read content that humiliates arrogant reader, please skip it!!)
cw: yandere, non-con, abuse of power, humiliation, forced breeding
Aventurine has a spacious office, including glass for gazing at the Milky Way and nebulae, a holographic projector, and advanced computers. In addition to this, to satisfy some fashion needs, he added trinkets such as small fountains and bonsai, as well as jellyfish lamps.
Aventurine takes your humiliation to the next level by sitting on his lap and warming his cock for hours when no one else is around (and inevitably creampies in the end). Takes all your clothes and hides you under his desk when some clients come to visit. When their rudeness attacks the senior manager, the polite smile becomes subtle, and the hands push your head lower, and the cock is pressed against your throat. Your lips were stretched open by that, but you had to hold back that sound, otherwise a longer humiliation would be waiting for you.
Shutter sound!! You glare at the camera in annoyance. If your gaze could burn things, you would have burned a hole in that phone, but your hands are spread out on the ground, like some well-behaved pet. Well, you know the lesson, don't you? There is a penalty for taking your hands off the ground. You growled and scolded him, like "I will make you regret it", "despicable", "I will be promoted again and trample you under my feet…" The cream on your face and the messy hair betrayed you. You're just bluffing. Spanking should teach you a better attitude. Pull you up and spank you. After 10 minutes you learn to shut up from the slaps. It should be you who regrets it, after all. Your current situation could have been avoided if you had not taken pleasure in setting him up and humiliating him before.
Hmm, Aventurine got the notice to go on a business trip to Pentacony. You are now just the lowest level P13. As his current assistant (pet), you must follow him to this planet. You mumbled as you followed him and took care of the boring tasks of serving drinks. Unexpectedly, the leader of the Oak Family asks to speak to you in private. Aventurine glanced at you before pulling away and giving you some space.
According to intelligence, it seems that you are now working for this…Mr. Aventurine? I know he can't offer you any promotion right now. Why not consider joining The Family? We are in need of a senior staff to coordinate our activities.
After Sunday left, Aventurine asked you about the content of the conversation. Your thinking is interrupted. You can accept the offer and leave this humiliating work environment! What company would send you to work for coworkers who hate you after your business plan fails? You smiled proudly and said that you would inform him that you were resigning.
Boom. This is not surprising. He pretends to be annoyed and frustrated, and watches your face become increasingly smug. Oops, same as before, but now you look cute. According to IPC's contract, you still have two weeks to work for him.
You didn't realize at the time how…intense these two weeks would be. Wipe that arrogance off your face again. Your ass is swollen from the paddle spank, bouncing on his cock, glistening with water and cum. You held back the whimper in your teeth ("You…you're so horrible…"). Carry three vibrators with you everywhere, those three straps tied to your thighs. Aventurine adjusts the vibration level freely in the pocket. In front of the passengers, you tremble and clench your legs, trying to stay normal or find a chair to sit down. Pour some fragrant wine down your throat during the kiss. You untie his tie and service his cock with bleary eyes. And creampie. creampie. creampie.
But the belief in resignation sustains you. You know you can overcome and one day regain your dominance!
On the last day, you were humming happily and walking briskly…until Aventurine showed you a warning, proof that you had maliciously damaged company property many times during your work, and you needed to repay this debt. You can't believe that number…it's so exaggerated…you won't be able to pay it back even if you go bankrupt. what is that? Why did he frame you like this?
"I learned something from you." Aventurine declared, holding your shoulders and comforting you softly…you who finally…sobbed loudly. "I guess you will have to work for a long time to pay off this debt. Don't worry, we will face it together."
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tragedybunny · 7 months
Note
Well since you are asking for asks, here's one! How about a Astarion one (shocking I know) where they are on their way to baulders gate to confront Cazador but Astarion is plagued by nightmares that he will lose Tav/reader to his former master and goes to them to ensure they are still there and its angsty with fluff. Please? Thank you!
My usual apologies for my work rate Anon. I hope you enjoy.
What Haunts His Nights - Astarion x F!Reader
Astarion is plagued by nightmares on the road to Baldur's Gate.
Astarion didn't really sleep, Elvish meditation was usually enough, unless the vampire ended up injured or exhausted, then he'd fall into healing sleep like the rest of his kind. So how he managed to have nightmares any time he tried to rest seemed like some sort of immense joke of the universe. Which would fit with the rest of his existence. Ever since you'd ended things at Moonrise Towers and your path to the city was clear, the same subject haunted him. 
Cazador. Only this time it wasn't just him who suffered at those accursed hands. It was you, Cazador had somehow learned of your relationship and would use it to make you both suffer. Sometimes he killed you outright, other times he'd kidnap you and torture you until Astarion willingly returned to him. Worst of all were the visions of you made into another spawn, forced to serve the Vampire Lord.
For the most, he tried to hide it, much as he loved you, it wasn't in his nature to trust you with every fear and flaw. But they were getting worse, more haunting, even as his attachment to you grew. The more he loved you, the more afraid he became. Tonight though brought that fear to dizzying new heights, his siblings had found you, here at Wyrm's Crossing, meaning Cazador could find you all as well.  
Instincts had firstly led him to secure their cooperation in the ritual. It hadn't been a lie when he'd said it was to protect you too. Losing you would be the same as losing himself. But now, laying here next to you in the tent you'd been sharing, other thoughts had crept in, the reality crushing down on him, Cazador could take you if he wanted to. This was no home he had to be invited into, there was no protection here. 
Trying to push it from his mind, Astarion let himself fall into meditation, no deep sleep needed tonight. As soon as his mind quieted though, there was Cazador. "A willing substitute, a lamb to the slaughter." You knelt before him, bare from the waist up, the dagger in his hand carving the same Infernal words into your skin that Astarion himself bore. 
Weeping silently, you endure, until the foul work is finished. Then it is as though Cazador finally notices him. "If you would have just come home boy, she wouldn't have to suffer. But look what she does for love of you." 
A scream nearly tears itself from his throat, and the meditation breaks. Rolling on his side, he chokes and gasps, an impressive feat for someone who doesn't need to breathe. Squinching his eyes shut, he finds himself unable to turn and look at the place you were sleeping, knowing it would tear him apart to find you gone. "Just a nightmare, " he whispers, trying to convince himself. Gods, how unfair was this, he'd barely learned how to love, and now he had to worry he could lose it at any moment. 
You had to be there though, safe and undisturbed, he couldn't even fathom anything else. He rolled, dead heart aching, to find you where he'd left you, sweetly asleep in the little nest of blankets the two of you had made. Almost immediately his eyes began to sting and he swallowed a cry. Cazador didn't have you, and when Astarion ascended in his place, he could make sure nothing ever threatened the two of you again.
Arms enfold you as he snuggles tight against your back, calming as he concentrates on the rhythmic sound of your heartbeat, the motion of your chest as you breathe, the warmth of your skin, all the signs you're real and here with him. He must be holding you tighter then he thought because you stir. "Love, you alright," you murmur, half awake. 
There's a bit of guilt in waking you, but hearing your voice is a soothing balm he hadn't realised he needed. "Nothing to worry about my Sweet," he tries but his voice is shaky. 
"Another nightmare?" Now you're alert and he feels terrible. Even worse, he hasn’t been able to hide this all from you. 
"... Yes," he confesses, "Cazador." The name spills from his mouth like a curse. 
"Do you want to talk about it?" Fingers lace with his where they rest over your stomach and squeeze. 
"Not really, I'm sorry." You're so kind to want to listen but he just wants to try to forget. The thoughts of Cazador have left him reeling and he worries he'll anger you by not talking, even if he can't remember a time you were actually angry at him. 
"Don't apologise, I'm here if you need me, but you don't have to tell me anything." Then miraculously, you take his hand, bring it to your lips, kiss it delicately, before cradling it with both of yours. "Love you," you whisper sweetly. 
In a completely undignified moment, he whimpers softly and holds you even tighter, kissing the back of your neck. "Love you too." He can't lose you, and soon he'll be strong enough to make sure that never happens. 
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wekiamo · 1 year
Text
still love you
first request!! hope you guys enjoy it (ik the title is so cliche im sorryy 😭)
part 2 here
warnings: spoilers for Scream VI, swearing, angst, fluff, mentions of getting stabbed and murdered, and i think thats all!
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no, this can’t be happening. ethan landry? your fucking boyfriend? no, this had to be some sort of joke.
at least, that’s what you thought. but you knew well it wasn’t true, and you were just trying to convince yourself none of this was real. well, it didn’t work. you were still there, standing in front of all these killers you’ve been running away from.
you were still trying to process everything that was happening, when quinn steps forward your direction with her knife in her hand, and your brain just stops working correctly. you could be killed right there and right now. you certainly didn’t want to die, you still had so much to live - you wanted to travel the world, learn new languages, meet new people and even have an own family. and you wanted to experience it all with ethan. the guy you just found out to be a psycho killer, who was just trying to kill you this entire time. all of your moments together were fake? you felt the need to cry even harder than you were already. ethan, the guy who you loved the most in this world and you thought loved you back, did not want you or your love
he wanted your blood. he wanted to see you dead.
“oh poor [name], you’re not even what we want. there’s no need to be so scared of us this soon.” quinn said as she turned to sam and tara “it’s you two bitches we want”
“why? why are you all doing this? did we ever do something to you-” tara was cut off by quinn’s voice “yes you little whores you KILLED OUR BROTHER” she said, yelling at the two sisters.
“we don’t know who you guys are talking about, seriously!” tara said with a desperate voice and look in her eyes, while sam looked like she was processing their words slowly.
“is… richie… your brother?” sam asked, between pauses.
“yes, and it was you, sam. you were the one to kill him you fucking slut” quinn said kind of quiet, but loud enough for everyone to hear.
“now, we all know both of you girls love [name] like she’s your sister too. wouldn’t it be such a despairing thing to watch her be stabbed and killed right in front of you?” bailey asked, making ethan smirk “i don’t think we should do it right in front of them, dad. they shouldn’t even get to see it, only listen to her screaming miserably while she’s dying” the tall boy said, gaining everyone’s looks at him.
“nice one, ethan. wanna do the honours?” bailey asked the boy, who was smirking once again.”
“you better not fucking TOUCH her, you asshole” sam yelled. “you don’t get to yell at us, bitch” quinn, that was next to her and tara, threatened sam with the knife in front of her throat
“come over here” bailey ordered, and you not obeying him. “no, no i’m not going to.” you said crying, trying not to fall on your knees from the mental weakness you were experiencing.
“NOW.” ethan yelled in a rough tone. you stepped forward slowly scared for your life as you could perfectly listen to tara’s whines. “stupid slow whore” quinn said behind you as she pushed you hardly, making you stand in front of bailey and ethan.
were these your last moments?
you finally managed to say something: “ethan, i- how could you do this to me?”
“yeah, and how could you be so dumb?“ ethan laughed as bailey and quinn did too, you looking at each of them, with fear and disbelief in your face.
“well now i guess it’s time to say goodbye to your little friends” the boy said, grabbing you roughly by your wrist and pushing you in front of him, taking both of your hands and putting them together on your back as he grabbed your shoulders, guiding you somewhere.
“tara, sam, please, i don’t wanna die.”
you were now somewhere darker. you couldn’t really see what was happening inside the place, but you knew something: these were probably your last moments.
he took his hands off your shoulders and stopped guiding you, as you stopped walking too. he was now standing right in front of you.
“i loved you deeply, ethan. do you know how much i trusted you? or how many times i argued with my friends for defending you and your unexistent fucking innocence? of how many times i cried just by feeling guilty of being suspicious of you? i loved you and trusted you with my heart, ethan.”
“listen [name], i need you to scream” the boy said gently, making your brows furrow in confusion.
“what?”
“scream like you’re getting stabbed or something.”
“wait, you’re not going to kill me..?”
“don’t ask too many questions. just do it, quick before they come and check what we’re doing.”
you smiled and hugged him tight. you knew this could be some sort of trap but you still felt relieved that there was a chance of you getting out of here, and see all of your friends alive and happy again.
“okay i’m ready. 1, 2, 3-”
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sunvmars · 8 months
Text
bitter sweet | s.r.
pairing: steve rogers x fem/afab reader
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next ↠
word count: 2.8k
warnings: obv swearing, pregnancy/pregnant reader, some angst that's mainly reader trying to cover up hidden emotions
summary: you've grown to resent steve after a breakup and give him the cold shoulder for weeks. you soon discover you're pregnant and show back up on his doorstep to tell him the news.
a/n: definitely turning this into a series if it gains enough traction!
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It was a warm summer evening like any other when Steve had asked you to come straight home after work, insisting he had something important to talk about. You had entered your shared apartment with expectations of a nice dinner or a movie night. Considering Steve was always one for suspension, surprise plans and at-home date nights weren't unusual.
You set your purse down on the table by the front door before sinking into your favorite recliner. The setting sun cast a glow amongst the living room that you greatly appreciated, although it was a glow that was far too beautiful to be wasted on that night.
"Steve! I'm home!"
Only a few seconds after you'd called out had he come, practically, running. He came to sit on the couch, only a few feet away, his expression conflicted.
"I missed you today," you said.
You beamed at your fiancé, simply happy to see him after another shitty work day. While you were an Avenger, you stuck to mainly office work when you had no missions.
After what felt like an eternity, he finally spoke, his voice barely above a whisper, "Y/n, honey, I think we need to talk."
Your heart sank, and a lump formed in your throat. You knew Steve like the back of your hand, and every time he has said the words "we need to talk," it's never been good.
"Is Buck sneaking over to eat all of our sweets again? I thought you talked to him about that," you joked in an attempt to lighten the tension.
"Funnily enough, no, he hasn't done that in a few days."
"Well, don't jinx it."
He chuckled briefly. His hands ran over his face as he sighed, and his broad shoulders relaxed.
"I've been thinking- a lot," he began, avoiding your gaze. "Baby, you know I love you, right?"
You hummed, giving him a nod that allowed him to continue.
"I love you, but..."
As soon as you had heard the "but," you tuned out. Whether it was by choice, or whether your mind and heart already knew what he was going to say and were just saving you the extra heartbreak, you weren't sure. You did, however, catch the last part of it. And luckily, the last part was all you needed to hear from him.
"I can't allow this to continue. I'm no good for you, y/n. I can't be the man you need or deserve right now. It's not fair to keep you waiting while I'm still trying to figure out what I want."
Your brows furrowed as your body started becoming tense. "What...?" you muttered.
It was less of a question and more of you thinking aloud, vocalizing your confusion. Unless you were a completely oblivious idiot, things between the two of you were fine yesterday, and every day before that for the last two years. He sighed, finally meeting your gaze. His eyes were filled with regret that you somehow missed.
"I... I can't take the risk anymore. I need to focus on my responsibilities and protecting the world. It's just... I can't let my personal life get in the way of my promise to the world."
Tears welled up in your eyes, but you quickly wiped them away before they could fall. You had the same job, so how could the man who had proposed only a few months ago just now, after two years, decide he couldn't make this work because of his job? Either way, that man didn't deserve your tears, so you wouldn't waste them on him. You stood quickly, not bothering to look back at him as you made your way towards the door.
"Y/n? Where are you going? Please say something, baby-"
"Don't! You don't get to call me that anymore," you snapped, finally allowing yourself to show some sort of emotion. "Just...stop. There's nothing else to say."
His eyes widened a little at your sudden outburst. You picked up your purse and keys hastily. Your fingers fidgeted with the keys for a moment, then you started sliding your house key off your keychain. It was then that you decided to speak again before he got the chance to, not caring to hear another word from him.
"I'll have someone come get my stuff tomorrow; do whatever you want with the apartment, as long as you don't have to contact me to do it."
"Y/n," he spoke with softened, glossy eyes, "please, just stay until you find somewhere else to go. This is your home too, I-"
"There's too much of you, well, what used to be us, here," you stated plainly as you placed your key on the table. "Where I go isn't your problem anymore anyway."
A sigh escaped your lips as you slung your purse over your shoulder. You turned to face him one last time as you stood in the doorway.
"Oh, and one more thing," you say, "You are a fucking coward, Steven Grant Rogers."
The door slammed behind you. And what you'd left behind was a deeply regretful, and utterly stupid, Steve sitting alone on the couch in the apartment you once shared.
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That was almost two months ago, and your heart had not allowed you to heal at all. As if seeing Steve in passing at work wasn't painful enough, now you had an important mission coming up tomorrow, and being chosen to go with him was inevitable. Or at least you thought it was inevitable. It had all started earlier in the morning with a rotten egg- an actual rotten egg, that is.
You were baking cookies for Bucky, fully aware of how much he'd miss your baked goods for the next week or two you would be gone. Over the time that you and Steve had dated and been engaged, you'd gotten pretty close with the brunette. He was equally supportive of both of you during the breakup. Though he did lay into Steve for leaving you. Bucky knew there was more to it than his job; both of you had the same job for Christ's sake, but he didn't push his friend for answers—at least not yet.
With one gentle motion, you cracked the egg on the side of your metal bowl. However, this egg had a smell to it. You brought it closer to your face to observe and smell it. What a horrible mistake, though, because as soon as you inhaled the sickening, sulfur-like scent, it made your stomach turn. But instead of going back to normal, you gagged. The scent was lingering longer than any other scent you'd ever smelled, almost as if you were permanently damned to having the smell stuck in your nostrils.
Then the hot stomach acid started coming up, and it was coming fast, signaling you needed a trashcan now. You bolted towards the nearest bathroom, preferring to take a chance on making a mess in a hallway rather than the kitchen. You passed Steve and Bucky on your way there, both men stopping dead in their tracks to watch as you ran into the bathroom only a few feet behind them.
"Huh," Steve mumbled, his heart throbbing at the sight of you.
"Sometimes I get sick when I look at you too, punk."
Bucky chuckled at his own joke, earning a glare from Steve.
"Go check on her for me, please."
"Always. But I won't keep giving you updates on her, y'know? It's not fair to her, Steve," Bucky sighed.
Steve only nodded in understanding, a smile only staying on his lips for a few seconds. He patted Bucky's back before turning on his heels and continuing on his path.
Your stomach clenched harder, and the vomit raced up your throat faster than ever. You barely got to the toilet before retching and gagging again, feeling instant relief when the bile finally came up. But then came a sudden second wave of nausea that seemed to be worse than the first. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the torture finally ended.
You stood up slowly and made your way to the sink. After tearing off a piece of paper towel, you dampened it under warm water. You wiped your mouth off with the damp napkin and threw it away before opening the door to leave.
"You okay?"
You jumped back slightly, looking over to meet piercing blue eyes. There was Bucky leaning up against the wall next to the bathroom door with his arms crossed.
"Jesus, Buck. You stalking me?"
"Stalking you? Definitely not. If I wanted to stalk someone, I'd find someone more interesting who doesn't eat half pints of vanilla bean ice cream and watch Pride and Prejudice or The Notebook every night," he jokes.
"Hey! It's how I cope and get over things; it's soothing."
"Yet you still pine over him, so how's that working out for ya?"
"...not great. Maybe I do need a new method, huh?"
The two of you exchange a laugh, and you start making your way back to the kitchen with Bucky right on your heels.
"So, are you okay?" he questions again.
"Just felt a little sick, that's all. And, hey, here's a tip: don't ever smell a rotten egg, it's not a pleasant experience," you say with a soft sigh.
He chuckles at your joke and replies, "Thank you for that. I'll remember that."
When you make it to the kitchen, he plants himself on a bar stool only a few feet away from you. You decide to continue making your cookies, holding your breath as you clean up the old egg.
"Wow, I can smell that from here. You weren't lying. That is bad."
His nose turns up and his face scrunches, earning a giggle from you. You two chat as you make the dough, and soon enough, you're finished baking. As you put the last cookies on the tray, Bucky stands up to get a closer look.
"God. Per usual, those smell amazing," he groans, reaching for one of the hot sweets.
You swat his hand away with a laugh. "Not until they're cooled down!"
He fakes a frown that makes you laugh again. You shake your head, making a 'tsk' noise at him.
"You're a menace, Buck," you joke.
He only shrugs his shoulders with a lopsided grin, then he pulls you into a hug. "Somebody has to get on your nerves. It keeps you distracted and on your feet," he teases.
"Thank you for being here for me."
Your body relaxes in his arms. You wrap your arms around his upper waist to return the sentiment. You take a deep breath and then pull away from the hug.
"How are you feeling, by the way?"
"It's almost like it never happened," you smirk.
"That's a lie, and you know it."
You're about to speak again, but close your mouth as soon as it opens. The nausea pools in your stomach again, forcing a huff out of you.
"I think I'm gonna be sick again."
"You're still feeling that bad over it?"
"No, I genuinely think I'm gonna throw up again, Buck," you say hurriedly, pushing by him to get back to the bathroom. "Put those cookies in a bag, Barnes! They're all yours!"
He chuckles and holds his thumb up in the air, even though you can't see it. "And you get yourself to the doctor, l/n."
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And going to the doctor is exactly what you chose to do.
Well, almost.
You instead chose to go to the lab with Tony and Bruce, and you only decided to go after about the fourth wave of nausea that came around five hours after the first. Which is how you ended up in the lab with grippy socks on and a cold Sprite in hand as you await blood and urine test results.
"So, how are you holding up, kid?" Tony asks, his eyes glued to his computer.
"Been better, had better days."
He looks away from his computer for a moment, making eye contact with you. "I could just kill him for hurting you, and I hope you know that," he states, his voice carrying nothing but genuine honesty.
"Aw, Tony, you're just like the dad I never dreamed of having—violently overprotective and overdramatic."
Bruce chuckles, but Tony just rolls his eyes, focusing back on his computer.
"That's what I get for trying to be nice to you," Tony scoffs, trying his best to hide the smile that wants to creep onto his face.
"I'm going to take a walk, Tony. I'll be back in a few minutes," Bruce announces as he rises from his chair. "If the computer beeps, it's her results coming back."
"Got it," Tony responds plainly, entirely too distracted by something on his screen.
The computer beeps only a few minutes after Bruce walks out, indicating an update to your information. Tony swivels his chair over to the big screen and pulls up your test results. He studies them carefully, not saying a word.
"So...what's wrong with me?"
He's still silent when he turns to face you. At first, he looks shocked, but then his brows furrow and his eyes narrow ever so slightly. If you hadn't known him for as long as you have, you'd think he was judging you based on his facial expression, but you knew he wasn't. He looked conflicted and confused, almost hesitant.
"What is it, Tone? You're freaking me out here. Is it the flu? A stomach bug? Food poisoning?"
"How about a baby?"
Your jaw drops, literally. The words pool in your mind, and your brain starts feeling like it's going to explode from all the different emotions and thoughts. You start to feel sick to your stomach again but manage to push the feeling down.
"I..." you start, unable to find the words to finish.
"I'm sorry, y/n. I won't tell anyone, okay? Not even Bruce. We need to set you up with a doctor. I have an amazing one I can call to come here and-"
"I appreciate that, Tony, but I need time to think first. We'll, uhm, talk tomorrow if that's okay."
"Of course," he empathizes, a sympathetic smile tugging at his lips. "Come here, kid."
You shuffle your way into his open arms, not having the energy to return the hug. He pulls away after a few seconds and allows you to step back.
"I think I'm gonna go...or something... I don't know," you mumble, making your way towards the door.
"Hey, y/n?"
"Yeah?"
"If this is something you want, don't let him ruin it for you."
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As soon as you leave the lab, it's like you're on autopilot.
Your feet took you to the downstairs office, then outside, and then to your car. When you get into your car, you tell yourself you're going to the store to grab some more ice cream. But your heart has other ideas; ideas such as Steve.
So, you drive yourself all the way to Steve's apartment, just wanting to be comforted by the familiarity for a moment. Then, somehow, you end up outside the front door of what used to be your shared space.
Your soft knock pulls Steve from the closest to sleep he's been in weeks. He curses under his breath, loathing whoever is at the door for ruining his chance at a few minutes to hours of peace.
However, that hate replaces itself with regret and adoration as soon as he opens the door to reveal your slouched-over form. Steve recognizes that look on your face, along with your body language, and it's evident that something is wrong.
As if you showing up at his door isn't surprising enough, you look up at him before letting yourself fall into his arms. He stands in shock as you lay your head on his warm and familiarly sculpted chest. Then sobs wrack through you, shaking your whole body, and that's all it takes for him to give into instinct and wrap his arms around you. The heat of his body and the feeling of his embrace provide a warming comfort as you cry into his shirt, only coaxing you further to let it all go.
One of his hands rubs your back gently while he holds you. "Y/n? What's wrong, honey? Talk to me," he coos.
You feel a tightness in your chest, a feeling that you can't put into words right now even if you tried your hardest to. In fact, all you can do is cry more as you hold tightly onto the sides of his shirt. You practically crumble into his chest, melting in his arms, and Steve understands. That's what made you fall for him in the first place, honestly - he always understands.
So, with no more words spoken, he holds you in the same doorway you walked out of only a couple of weeks ago. He holds you in that doorway until your tears slow and your breathing returns to normal. At some point, his thick fingers begin combing through your hair soothingly, the same way they used to every night at bedtime.
"I don't know what your stance on kids before marriage and after a breakup is, but you should figure it out soon," you mutter into his chest.
His body freezes, and his mind scrambles to catch up with your words. He looks down at your head, his eyebrows furrowing as he tries to make sense of the situation.
Are you truly saying what he thinks you are? You couldn't be...
"I'm pregnant, Steve."
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