#I like hulk cause it’s also a bruce but I like hawkeye more. guy is very comfort character | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

superfanficnatural · 3 years

Text

Out in the Open

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Male!Reader

Summary: You always loved to tease Steve Rogers, always messing around with him and just having fun. Little did you know, he was going to pay you back for all of the embarrassment in full.

A/N: Ok so I haven’t written in a little over two months so I am soooo nervous to be posting this. This is also my first fic for the Marvel fandom and for Steve Rogers, I really hope you guys don’t think I’ve gotten senile haha. This was written for @anaelsbrunette “YAS’S 20TH BIRTHDAY BASH.” As always, I hope you enjoy!

This story was beta’d by the lovely @crashdevlin huge shoutout to her for her help. You guys should really go check out her amazing works!! ❤️

Warnings: Smut, NSFW 18+, Daddy Kink, Dirty Talk, Spanking, Fingering, Rimming, Oral Receiving (Male), Rough Sex, Anal, Exhibitionism, Degradation? Praise? um... fluff? Once again, probably a few others that I’m missing.

Word Count: 4,692

If someone had told you that you were going to be working with the Avengers to fight evil a month ago, you would have laughed in their face.

Now, as you quite literally stand next to your fellow Avengers fighting one of the last remaining Hydra bases, you can’t help but smile at how you could think about that at this moment.

“Y/N! Get your head in the game! Hawkeye needs backup!” a voice rang out in your earpiece.

“I’m all in, Cap, maybe if you would stop staring at my ass you would have realized that you’re the distracted one here,” you responded with wit.

An eruption of laughter was echoing in your comm link, a disgruntled groan coming from Steve.

“On my way to you, Eagle,” you spoke up, wanting to get back on track for the mission.

After the breakout of the terrigen crystals, you were one of the first Inhumans to come into contact with it. You remember how you were taking something as innocent as fish oil when you started to feel like your skin was shedding. It was like a drug, booming throughout your system, making your internal compass go haywire as a black substance swirled around your body. Next thing you saw was darkness, a cocoon of it. You tried to move but you were incapable of such an action, frozen in place as you feared the worst. Eventually, you could feel your body begin to revive, as if new blood was coursing through your system, making you stronger. By the time the strange substance had broken into pieces off of your body, you didn’t know how long you were in there for, but it felt... right. It was as if a forgotten piece of yourself was finally found, you felt whole. Little did you know that your Inhuman DNA was then unlocked.

“I wasn’t looking at your... behind,” you heard Steve say, raising another laugh from both you and the others.

“Whatever makes you feel more like a gentleman,” you quipped.

Ever since you had joined the Avengers, hell, even before then, you always had the biggest crush on Steve. Seeing him on TV saving the world with that million dollar smile, you were swooning every time. Now that you’ve had the chance to fight alongside him, your attraction ran even deeper. Getting to know him, seeing him fight to protect humanity, who wouldn’t find that ridiculously attractive?

You glanced over at him on the battlefield, seeing him expertly take out four Hydra soldiers in six seconds flat. He was a bit ahead of you so you only managed to see his backside... no wonder they call that ‘America’s Ass’.

You decided that was enough looking and got back to the fight, giving Hawkeye an assist as you took out three of the soldiers that were attempting to flank him. Suddenly, Thor flashed past you at light speed and sent tingling electricity throughout your body, crashing straight into a pillbox and taking out a gunner.

“Damn it, Thor. Keep your electricity away from me!” you shouted into the earpiece, your legs feeling weak.

You could hear him chuckle even though he tried to hide it, “My apologies, Sir Y/N.”

You could have sworn he did it on purpose.

After going through terrigenesis, you had no idea what had happened to you. You knew you felt different, but other than that, you were mostly spooked. Instead of trying to find answers to what had happened to you, you had ignored it, not wanting to become a guinea pig at some military black site. But eventually, you couldn’t run from it any further. Whenever you had gotten anxious, or when any of your emotions were heightened, everything around you began to shake and vibrate. It was like you could hear everything around you, and when you focused on one sound, it would become elevated, so high that it began to violently shake. After you nearly caused an earthquake in your hometown, you knew you wouldn’t be safe any longer, you knew someone was going to come for you. So you went on the run, never staying in one place for too long, always on the move. You tried to learn how to control your powers over the few weeks that you were running, actually managing to damn near master it. You knew that you had the ability to tab into the vibrations of the objects around you. After some Google searches, you found out that everything vibrates on its own unique frequency, the plants, the trees, even your cell phone. And once you focused and tapped into those frequencies, you realized that you could control the amount of vibrational frequency coming off of it. It was like a cooler version of telekinesis, you practiced and practiced, being able to move objects around without even touching them. Then after about two weeks, you knew that you had more potential than you realized.

“Stark, get that shield down, now!” Steve belted into your comm, the sound of blasters firing and fighting all around him.

“Relax Cap, just keep staring at Y/N’s ass, I’ll take care of it,” Tony responded.

You couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped your lips, “Oh god, what did I start?”

“Something you’re going to regret,” Steve chimed in.

You heard a huge blast and looked up to see the shield surrounding the building had been disabled, or more... destroyed.

“Good work, Tony. Let’s clean it up,” Nat chirped.

Looking ahead, you saw about a dozen or so men with their backs against the trees in front of you. Chuckling to yourself, you thrusted out your arms and focused your power into them, building it up into a large shockwave that rippled throughout the forest in front of you, ripping the trees in half with the force behind them and taking out the remaining men.

“Damn, Y/N! You’ve been holding out on us, boy!” Tony remarked as he flew overhead.

You smirked, satisfied with your work as you turned towards Steve’s direction to see his reaction. The second your eyes found his, they were staring right at you, his body still and his breathing heavy, most likely exhaustion from the fight. Instead of finding shock on his face, it was more of pride, and something... darker.

Once you found out that you were able to tap into frequencies and vibrations, you realized that it could be applied to more than just other objects. Your body was also giving off vibrations, and if you focused on it, you could increase it and send it out in a form of a shockwave. And after finally learning that skill, the government had finally caught up to you. You had mastered your ability so you had no trouble fighting them off, being careful to not severely harm anyone in the process since you didn’t want to be a murderous criminal either. Once you dispatched them, your name was finally known by anyone with power, and eventually, Nick Fury had found you. He said that you had power that you could use for good, to help people. And once he offered you a spot on the Avengers, you were too starstruck to say no.

You couldn’t quite guess what was running through his mind for you had to help rush the base with the others.

“Smash!” you heard Hulk belt out as he jumped hundreds of feet into the air and crashed right into the side of the base.

“So much for finesse,” Hawkeye grumbled.

“It’s the Hulk, what else do you expect?” you smiled, running into the building yourself.

After about another twenty minutes, the entire building was cleared out and your mission was deemed a success.

“Alright, good work everyone, let’s get back to the quinjet,” Cap announced, everyone making their way back to the plane.

On the way there, you were ahead of Tony and Steve and you could hear Tony through your earpiece, “Is there any particular reason that we’re walking behind Y/N, Cap?”

Everyone once again broke out into a fit of laughter, Steve’s face turning bright red, “I’m not looking at Y/N’s ass alright?!”

His sudden outburst shocked us a bit but Tony was waiting for that, “Did-did you just... curse?” he feigned being shocked, his mouth agape with a hand over his heart.

“I never would have thought such profanities would ever come out of the Captain’s mouth,” Thor chuckled as he slapped Steve’s shoulder while walking by.

The god then walked up to you and threw his arm around your shoulder, “Although Y/N does have a mighty fine physique, I have to commend him on his power. Your performance was divine enough to be sung about in the taverns of Asgard.”

You blushed immensely, let alone his thick and huge arm was resting around your shoulders, he even complimented you, twice. Thor was always attractive to you, he’s a damn god for crying out loud! Although, as much as you wanted to see him naked and even go further than that, Steve had stolen your heart... along with another thing of yours. By now, both Steve and Tony caught up to you, Nat and Hawkeye walking with Bruce up ahead. The second you turned your head to look at them, they could see the bright red color on your face, and while Tony was trying to hide a grin, Steve looked absolutely infuriated. You were struck by the anger simmering in his eyes that you looked away, a little bit too fast, for you could still catch the hint of the smirk Thor had on his face.

“Yeah, what the hell was that, kid? I’ve never seen you do anything like that,” Tony questioned.

You blushed a bit more and chuckled nervously, “Just another trick up my sleeve, didn’t really have to use it before now.”

Steve still looked a bit pissed, but a bit of admiration was also found in his expression, warming your heart. To be able to receive praise from the man or woman of your dreams is something that everyone wants, and even though he never really verbally told you, you could tell he was proud. With a bit more banter and laughter from everyone, you got on the quinjet and headed back to the Avengers compound.

The flight wasn’t too long, maybe about an hour or so. The entire time, everyone couldn’t get enough of both Steve cursing and the joke that he was looking at your ass. You swore, he looked like he was about to throw everyone out of the airlock, his face red with embarrassment. Once you had gotten off of the quinjet, everyone headed back to their rooms to take their showers, everyone caked with either blood or mud. You glanced over at Steve before he turned the corner to his room, his handsome face bloodied and dirty, and couldn’t help the tightening in your pants. How the hell was he always so goddamn pretty?!

When you got to your room, you tossed your bag into the corner and began to undress. Your clothes were sticking to your body with all the sweat and grime and you felt incredibly uncomfortable. Turning on the water, you took a moment to let it get warm, looking at yourself in the mirror. You traced every bruise and scar that you had, counting all of them like the stars at night. You couldn’t help the grimace on your face as you looked at yourself. Compared to the other guys on the team, you were probably the least physically defined. Sure, you had muscle, but it wasn’t anything special, not watermelons for biceps like the others. It made you a bit self-conscious; would Steve really get with someone like me when there are so many better options? You shook those thoughts from your mind, getting into the warm shower with the steam rising around you. It felt amazing, the warm water was relaxing the tense muscles you had and was washing away the evidence of your previous battle. You sat under the spray for a while, letting yourself relax and just letting the warm water cascade over you.

Eventually, you decided that it was enough, pushing the electronic button in the shower, it turned off and you opened the door, drying yourself off and wrapping the towel around your waist. You turned on the blowdryer and dried your hair, styling it in the way you always do then walking out of the bathroom, the steam crawling across the floor into the bedroom. Walking over to your closet, you picked out your clothes, underwear, socks, a pair of comfortable joggers, and a loose short sleeve shirt. After getting dressed and applying your cologne, you opened the door to your room, planning to go to the kitchen to find something to eat, only to be met with Steve’s chest.

You staggered backwards a bit and looked up at him, “S-sorry, I didn’t see you there.”

He looked incredible, smelled amazing too. He was clean from his shower and his scent was intoxicating, making your muscles relax and your mind to go a bit hazy. He had no answer to your apology, simply looking into your eyes with a strained look on his face. You were about to ask what was wrong before his lip curled and he reached out and grabbed you with both of his hands, digging into your shirt.

“Steve, wha-” you were cut off by his lightning fast motion of turning around and thrusting you into the glass pane in the hallway.

“You think it’s funny to embarrass and tease me in front of everyone, hm?” he asked angrily, his face inches away from yours, his warm breath spreading across your cheeks.

Your heart was racing and your mind was moving a million miles an hour, “T-tease you? Steve w-what are you talking about?”

“You know damn well!” he shouted, thrusting you back against the wall again, this time his leg slipping in between your thighs.

Shit.

A small whine came from your lips.

He looked down to see your erection poking against him, his knee rubbing it frivolously when he had thrusted you against the wall.

He smirked, “Well look what we have here.”

He moved his leg dangerously slow, just barely so you would whine and break apart.

“Steve, p-please,” you whined.

“You want to embarrass me in front of everyone? How about I do the same to you?” he suddenly turned you around and pressed you into the wall.

You could now have a perfect view of the outside, people walking about a hundred feet below you, the sun in the sky, the clouds flying by.

“I wanna fuck you right against the glass so everyone can see how good you take it,” he growled into your ear, biting it. “Maybe then you’ll feel as embarrassed as I was.”

Liquid heat flooded your body, your cock pulsing heavily in your pants. His strong grip was keeping your hands locked together behind your back, his broad chest laying against your back as he spoke. Luckily for you, this was going to be far from embarrassing.

“Maybe I will be, guess we won’t know until you fuck me,” you retorted, a smirk forming on your lips.

He sneered, “I’m gonna wipe that smile right off your face.”

Since your clothing was so loose, he had no problem ripping your pants down your legs, the cool wind of the AC hitting your legs as your joggers were bunched around your feet.

“Look at this ass,” he groaned, slapping it through the fabric of your underwear.

You jerked a bit at the contact and bit your lip, “Shit.”

He pressed you against the wall again, “Shut up, you’re only gonna make noise when I say so. For now, shut your mouth and take Daddy’s punishment.”

When he pushed you once more, his cock that was way too big to be considered a cock, pressed against your ass. You felt faint, your legs would have given out by now if he wasn’t holding you against the wall like he was. You didn’t even want to think about what he had called himself or else you would have came right there on the spot, and you were just getting started.

He spanked you a few more times, your lip hurting from how hard you were biting down on it to keep from making noise.

“You know, I actually was staring at your ass on that mission,” he admitted, “how could I not with how nice and perfect it looks?” he let out a groan. “Now, let’s see your pretty little pussy,” he teased, slowly inching down your underwear.

You never thought that someone referring to that area of your body like that would have been so hot but the idea that he was straight and was still going to fuck you had you leaking precum. Once he caught a glimpse, he got impatient and ripped off your underwear... literally. He pulled with so much force that a gasp left you, your eyes following a few pieces of ripped fabric float to the ground.

“This hole is mine, boy. You understand?” he claimed, grabbing your hole and the area underneath your balls with his fingers to pick you up just a tad bit further.

You whined in the mixture of pleasure and pain, “Yes, Steve.”

He didn’t let up, in fact, he gripped you a bit harder, “What was that?”

“Yes, Daddy,” you admitted, sagging in relief when he let you go but also missing the feeling his thick and warm fingers brought you.

“Daddy is right, boy,” he smirked against your throat, nibbling on the flesh there, sending shivers down your spine.

You had no idea how your day ended up like this but you couldn’t find it in yourself to care, only being able to focus on the feeling of his thick finger pressing against your rim.

“Let’s see how tight you are baby,” he grumbled, shoving his finger into your mouth to suck on before returning it to your eager hole.

The second you felt his finger begin to push in a bit, your entire body tensed up, “Shhh, relax, let Daddy take care of you.”

You went lax at his comforting words, your hole opening up for him.

“Fuuuck,” you let out in a low moan, his finger stretching you perfectly.

He chuckled behind you, “Damn boy, this is a tight hole.”

He pushed in further, slowly, getting you used to it. You were a writhing mess, not sure if you wanted more or for him to stop altogether.

“Daddy, please,” you begged.

“Please, what?” he smiled, sucking a deep bruise into your neck.

“Please, fuck me,” all your reservations were thrown out of the window, nothing on your mind but this man and how badly you wanted his cock.

“Well, since you asked so nicely,” he teased.

Suddenly, you were left feeling empty, Steve pulling his finger out of you. However, you weren’t stuck feeling that way for long, Captain dropping to his knees behind you and spreading your cheeks with his hands. You knew what was coming and you couldn’t help the satisfaction from spreading across your face, your ass wiggling back into him before he even started.

“Someone’s eager,” he remarked.

You didn’t bother with a response, simply waiting for him to finally reach you. And when he did, it felt nothing short of incredible. His hot tongue pressed against the outer part of your hole, making your body relax more than it already was, your body nearly slinking to the ground. He spent his sweet time tasting you, teasing you, waiting until the last possible moment to enter you.

“God, you taste amazing,” he moaned, returning to his ministrations, pulling a moan to come spilling from your lips.

He was tongue fucking you with such skill you wondered if he had done this before. He was switching between entering and exiting you at a fast pace and keeping his tongue inside of you while wiggling it around, pressing dangerously close to your prostate.

“Ngh, St-Daddy please, just give me your cock. Make your boy scream on it for everyone to see,” you were begging and panting like a bitch in heat.

The added thrill of being caught if only one person below you glanced upwards for even a fraction of a second had you teetering on the edge.

“Such a good boy for me, taking his punishment so well,” he praised, getting back up. “But before I fill you up, you need to get my cock nice and wet.”

He pulled you back around to face him, placing a searing kiss on your lips that had caught you off guard. He filled it with so much passion and drive that your cock jerked, the sensitive head leaking constant precum. Right after he ended the kiss, you were left breathless and he had pushed you down to your knees. You barely had any time to catch your breath before he forced his cock into your mouth, the taste of his precum instantly hitting your tastebuds. God, he tasted incredible. Since his advances were so quick, you barely even had time to comprehend how huge he truly was. Now, with his ridiculously huge member in your mouth, feeling how it stretched your lips out, how heavy it felt on your tongue, you knew you had never had nor seen a cock as thick or long as his.

“Fuuuuck baby, just like that,” he moaned out, his chest vibrating.

The vibration gave you an idea you wanted to try so you focused your power as you were desperately attempting to keep from choking on his length. Once you felt you were ready, you used your power, vibrating his cock as you moved back and forth over it.

He instantly pulled away with an abhorrently loud groan, “What in the hell was that?” he asked, breathless.

You were a bit shocked, “I just used my power and vibrated you while I sucked you off?”

His eyes were wide and his mouth was slightly agape.

“Did I do something... wrong? Did it hurt?” you had gotten up and began to get concerned.

“No, no, nothing like that,” he let out a heavy breath, “it just felt so damn good.”

You smirked at that, proud of the effect that you had on him. Though, you wouldn’t lie and say the mood hadn’t been killed just a bit. To keep from the silence, you surged forward and claimed his lips as your own. Your mouths moving together, tongues entering each other's mouths, moving in a dance. The passion of the kiss reignited the fire in your stomach, pouring out to reach every part of your body, your slightly softened cock revitalizing. The both of you pulled away from the kiss and he looked sexier than you had ever seen him before, his pink lips swollen, his cheeks flushed, hair tousled, and his eyes dark from the expanding of his pupils.

“Enough, it’s time for me to fill that ass up.”

You turned to walk into the bedroom, thinking that you would have sex on the bed, but Steve had other plans. He grabbed your arm and turned you around, pushing you back up against the wall, your face digging into the glass.

“I told you, I’m gonna fuck you against the glass for everyone to see,” he smirked.

With haste, the thick head of his cock pushed against your hole, sliding in relatively easy from all of the preparation he made. Still, the feeling of his tongue and fingers didn’t come even close to the sheer girth of his size, it felt like you were being split in half. Though, you still couldn’t get enough, pushing your ass back into him, feeling the warmth and the pubic hairs at the base of his cock.

“Goddamn, this ass is squeezing my dick so good baby boy,” he growled, jutting his hips sharply, forcing an involuntary moan to rip from your throat.

He grabbed your traps as a way to stabilize both you and himself as he picked up his pace, the sound of his thunderous thighs slapping against the globe of your ass echoing throughout the room. Grunts and groans were filling the space around you two, animalistic groans that made your cock ache against the window pane. Being spread out, submitting to such an authoritative man, it was better than any dream.

“Fuck, Daddy, you’re so big,” you moaned, your hair flying over your face from the speed of his thrusting.

“Yeah? You like my big cock?” he wrapped his arm around your chest and brought you up to his, turning your face to kiss you as he continued thrusting.

Let alone everything that has happened and is currently happening, his dirty talk managed to ramp you up like no other. The way he makes you feel so insignificant yet so special, the way he pleasured you, it was driving you insane. It sounded like a clique, but he truly ruined you for any other man.

His thrusting kept picking up more and more speed and you began to wonder if he could possibly get any faster than he already was. It probably had to do with the super soldier serum... how else was his cock so huge? The window was rocking with the force of his thrusts and your moans were unabashedly resonating in the hallway, any care for someone hearing obliterated. Hell, everyone under you was probably watching as well but you didn’t care, it spurred you on. He was mashing your prostate deliciously, his pin-point accuracy both appreciated and feared.

“Fuck, I’m close,” you whined.

He went from rapid thrusting to a somewhat slower pace but with more force behind each thrust, making you cry out in ecstasy each time he reached that sweet spot.

“Cum, cum on my cock,” he commanded, his deep and gravelly voice sounding like music to your ears.

At his command, you let go, you cock spasming and shooting your load all over the window, coating it in white. The sudden increase in tightness from your walls had Steve releasing a choked moan, his hips staggering in their pace... he was close.

“Fuck yeah Daddy, fill my ass up with your cum, breed me,” you moaned seductively, trying to milk him of his orgasm.

“Oh yeah, Daddy’s gonna fill up this tight hole, get ready,” he warned, getting louder and louder until eventually he reached his climax.

You could feel his warm seed coat the insides of your walls, his member throbbing inside of you, threatening to send you right into another orgasm. He let out a guttural growl and kept pumping through his euphoria, shooting load after load into you, so much that when he had pulled out, a steady stream had followed closely behind. You sagged against the wall, utterly spent and satiated while he had leaned back on the other side of the hallway against the door of your room. There was comfortable silence for a few minutes, the both of you breathing heavily and coming down from your respective highs. Your back was still arched, showing off your abused hole that Steve couldn’t get his eyes off of.

Suddenly, the door had chimed and someone had walked into the hallway.

“Well by the gods!”

You recognized that voice.

You turned your bright red face slowly towards his direction, the rest of your body still. You could see Thor in shorts and a tight t-shirt, hugging his muscles in all of the right places. You then looked down to see the outline of what seemed like a cock about the same size as Steve’s bulging out of his shorts.

He reached down and stroked himself through his pants, “Do you have enough energy for another cock, Y/N?”

You knew you said that Steve had ruined you for any other man, but... Thor wasn’t a man.

You smirked, “Shouldn’t be a problem.”

Forevers Tag List: @magssteenkamp @shadowsinger11 @donnaintx @flamencodiva @impala-1979 @talesmaniac89 @malfoysqueen14

Male Reader Tag List: @brymalibu @myybebe @winchesterzforever @spnfanboy777

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fandom-imagination-ss · 3 years

Text

Imagine: your Father Bruce Manner comes visits you unexpectedly and catches a very Sweaty Bucky in your closet half naked

‘Okay Doll relax we got all night!”

Smiling weakly hearing the sweet pet name Bucky gave you, grunted it was probably Not that “special” too him since in his time “doll” was a common phase. But in the 21 century? Where everything is highly complicated and everything offends something. Like even the nick name “doll” your friends heard him call you that and you LOVE IT! But your friends jumped on his back saying you aren’t a object and you agreed you aren’t but you also agreed that Nothing sounds better then him calling you “Doll” or sweetheart. Bucky quickly apoglized as you had too tell him if he stopped calling you Doll you would be mad.

it’s been a Long two weeks. Steve, Bucky, Nat, Hawkeye, Wanda and the kid Peter were on mission in Russia. You knew that they would be safe. I mean four outta six have superpowers. And you know Nat can protect herself and she’s a badass and she scares everyone and then thier was Hawkeye he was a basically a god with a arrow so you weren’t worried. But two weeks without Bucky was tough!

the Only people who knew about your relationship with Bucky was your friends who are not involved in the “Avenger” life mainly cause they don’t even know who your dad is. It was two different worlds and with your friends and Bucky you can be a regular couple no one questions it.

But if the Avengers KNEW!

If they knew Everyone would have questions, Nat would be supportive, Wanda would want too talk about how it happened. Tony would. Ask completely inappropriate questions , Steve would be silent but supportive. Vision wouldn’t care, But Bruce!

the HULK! Bruce! Your father would Have definitely a few words for you. He hated that you were so involved in the Avengers in the first place . Your Dad Only wants you too have a safe , normal life something you didn’t have much growing up. Let Alone! Dating a guy who was frozen who is technologically older then him and has a lot of baggage’s! You dad wouldn’t be thrilled.

Bucky agreed also, If they knew about your relationship the rules at HeadQuarters would be different for starters, he wouldn’t be able too sneak too your room anymore, because everyone would be stalking the hallways too see if he was coming over, and Bruce would use his massive brain too sperapte you bothd also Bucky very scared about the Hulk coming out and killing him.

Missions are apart of the gig you get it, you were just annoyed it’s been two weeks. He messaged you whenever it was safe but it wasn’t the same you were always restless when he was gone. So when the door opened and you saw him standing their grinning brightly you bolted over too him planting a kiss on his lips as he held you tightly.

both of you were unaware of Bruce heading towards he’s daughter apartment he held some flowers a tradition he started when he visited you at home too give you flowers. He wasn’t around much while you were growing up but when he did visit he bought you some flowers. Now that you see your dad almost every day he hasn’t done it lately but he’s seen how out of it you been for the last few weeks and he was hoping some flowers and too spend the day going too the national museum would cheer you up. You always love correcting the wrong dates. Picking up some beauitful sunflowers your favourite. He walked up heading up too his little girls appartment.

Having Bucky stripped it was always heated with you both and neither of you wasted time when he arrived him. You were ALMOST there! When the door knocked. You jumped high stunned hearing the door as Bucky went too ingore it until they heard Bruce’s cheerful voice.

‘sweetheart it’s Daddy you home?”

“Shit!’ You whispered softly as Bucky shot up as you got up quickly getting dressed as Bucky looked around trying to oo find something. He’s shoes? They were at the front door. You got into your jeans and your crop top that was white as you had your black fannel overtop as you called out “HOLD ON DAD!”

You pointed too the closest as Bucky nodded his head bolting too the closest as you walked off too the front door. Quickly moving Bucky’s shoes. As you checked yourself in the mirror. Oh God1 your hair was a mess and your makeup was awful! Your lipstick smeared as you realized you quickly grabbed a napkin fixing it as you spoke, “Sorry Dad-“ opening the door you looked at your dad seeing him holding fmlwoers you smield as you spoke, ‘what’s that for?” He handed them too you as you smiled as you sniffed them walking too the kitchen, “what brings you over? We didn’t have plans today did we?”

“No- I thought i would take you out- you been so sad and off lately I- Is that bucky’s bag?”

Shit- you thought as you turned seeing Bucky’s Bag on the sofa. You spoke, “no?”

He walked over looking at it as he spoke, “this is Bucky’s bag I just saw him with it- why did it take you so long too answer th door?”

you blinked stunned. As you spoke, “I- Ugh... i was looking for my shoes.”

“your barefoot..-“ he walked too your bedroom seeing the bed was unmade and messy , you followed him as you spoke, ‘let’s go get ice cream- Dad.?”

He ingored you going too your bathroom as he opened the door seeing it was empty. As you cursed softly. Damn it..

“Dad-“ you went. Too confess it was better if you tell him vs Bucky Buck naked appeared from the closest.

Before you could confess Bucky opened the door too your surprise and your fathers as he was still shirtless and covered in sweat. “I- Bruce- Sir.. this isn’t... I love her.”

Bruce felt his blood boiling. HIM! He knew one day that one idiot would take he’s daughter heart that he wouldn’t be good enough. But he was HOPING! The person would be her own age- and Not older then him- and he wouldn’t be a former agent from hydra, Or that he wasn’t basically a walking mess. He was HOPING that the person wouldn’t be a Superhero! He wanted you too have a normal life. He felt his anger raising as you stepped over, “Daddy- it’s fine.. it’s- were all adults and-“

he looked at the bed as you noticed that look instantly backing up as you spoke “Bucky.... you should Runn..”

The Hulk appeared as you quickly called out too Friday. Tony set you up last christmas for safety, and because he thought it would be fun too send you more codes thru the lights. When he was bored. Piper mainly thought safety.. but Tony thought a torment tool. “Friday! Code green!”

the hulk screamed loudly as Bucky stumbled backwarrds before heading towards you too shield you. As you slapped he is protective arm as you screamed, “he wont get me! He’s after you! Get away from me!” You bolted as he screamed, “THANKS FOR THE PROTECTION!”

“LOVE YOU!”

The hulk bolted towards Bucky who jumped out of the window.- the hulk followed making a massive hole in your wall. As you saw Tony flying over as he noticed the scene as he laughed as thor appeared too assistant as they tried too calm down your dad.

Back at the headquarters you sat beside Bucky rubbing his head. It was a Hell of a fight, as you spoke, ‘how- you okay?”

“he has some anger issues.”

“Yea- that’s generic- you should see when i get angry.” He grinned weakly at your lame joke as he spoke, “he broke my ribs..”

“you’ll heal!”

He rolled his eyes as you rested your head on his shoulder, “it could of been worst.”

“HoW!” He gasped as you spoke, “he could of easily! Ripped your head off!”

He rolled his eyes as Bruce arrived he was fiddling with his glasses as he looked at his only joy in his life resting her head on Bucky. He sighed heavily as Tony was squeezing he’s shoulders, “So- I personally want too hear everything!”

Tony stated as Bruce, Bucky and you snapped shut up. As you looked at your dad. “We were going too tell you- but honestly.. we were afraid you would of reacted- like you did..”

Bruce looked at you as he spoke, “how long?”

“almost a year.”

“Well- 14 months and three days.” You turned too Bucky as you spoke “you asked me out in October! It’s July.”

“I was yours the moment I saw you.”

you said aw touching your heard as Bruce spoke up, “Okay! Okay! No lovely doves stuff! Y/N! I’m sorry i broke your boyfriend.”

“thank you.”

Bucky asked if he gets a apoglize as Bruce spoke, “No! I dont like this!”

he walked off as Tony spoke, “he’s protective, those great way kids telling the old man!”

“Shut up! TONY!” You both snapped as he chuckled going after Bruce.

#bruce banner #Bruce banner Imagine #bucky barns #bucky barns imagine #marvel #marvel imagine #tfatws #tfatws imagine #the felcon and the winter soilder imagine #the felcon and the winter soilder #thor #fandom imagine #imagine

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ficsandgiggles · 4 years

Text

A Special Guest

This has to be the fluffiest fic I have ever written. It features Tony, Nat, Clint, Thor, Bruce, Peter and the six year old reader. Enjoy! 💕

Y/N was the six year old niece of Tony Stark, who recently discovered he had a long lost sister who got given away by his parents when she was just a few months old. Since the two had reunited, Tony had become a lot happier, knowing he had an actual blood sister.

Being the billionaire he is, Tony happily brought a house for his sister, her husband and her adorable daughter, and had offered to look after Y/N whilst the grown ups moved into their new home closer to family.

After waving goodbye to his sister, Tony held Y/N’s hand and guided her into her new temporary home. He smiled fondly as she shyly hid in Tony’s leg, resulting him in picking her up and holding her on his hip.

Tony understood why she was so overwhelmed, his sister told him how they were living in a crummy one bedroom apartment. The mould, dampness and lack of heat caused Y/N to get asthma as a baby and they rarely left the apartment due to the dodgy neighbourhood they lived in, which constantly had police around. So no wonder she was overwhelmed by such a huge building.

Not long after Tony and his sister got talking, he couldn’t help but smile when he heard that Y/N greatly admired the Avengers, and how she would always play pretend games as them and draw pictures of her with them. Tony remembered the look on Y/N’s face when she saw him from the first time, instantly recognising him from that great announcement.

Today was the first time Y/N was going to meet the rest of the team, and she was clearly nervous, despite the constant reassurance Tony gave her that they had the kindest hearts and that they are going to absolutely adore her. Y/N had even drawn a picture of each of them that she wanted to give to them all.

Tony carried Y/N into the lounge, where Bruce, Thor, Nat, Clint, Peter and Steve were. Clint and Nat were sat facing each other cross legged on the sofa having a thumb war. Thor and Steve were just trying to get to grips with a TV show whilst Peter was laughing at them and Bruce was in his own little world on his laptop.

“Here is our special guest guys.” Tony announced, bouncing Y/N to try and get her to turn around and face everyone, but she shyly remained hidden in Tony’s shoulder. Gentle coos could be heard from around the room as Tony put Y/N down, causing her to whine a little as she grasped Tony’s hand and hid behind him.

“Look, everyone’s here to see you!” Tony grinned, kneeling foes and pointing at everyone one by one. “There’s Captain America, Hawkeye, the not so scary Hulk, Black Widow, Thor, and Spider-Man!” Tony smiled as Peter approached the two of them with a smile.

“Come on, Y/N/N you love Spider-Man! You’ve seen him swinging around Queens before.” Tony said, gently nudging his niece to Peter, who was already sat cross legged on the floor waiting to greet her. “Why don’t you show him your gift?” Tony asked as he went into Y/N’s overnight bag, taking out a folded up drawing and giving it to her.

Peter smiled gently and patted his lap, making Y/N look back at her uncle before hesitantly sitting down in Peter’s lap, handing him the drawing she made for him.

“Wow, you drew this all by yourself? Aren’t you an amazing little artist! Please may I keep it?” He asked, which almost made Y/N smile as she nodded, still staring at the floor.

“Oh thank you! I’m going to put it up in my room so I can see it every day... anyway, was that a smile I almost saw?” He asked, looking down to see if he could see her smile. Y/N shook her head in response, but him simply asking that almost made her smile again.

“Oh I think it waaaas~” Peter sang teasingly before gently tickling her belly, making tiny tickly noises as he did so, which obviously got Y/N giggling, she leant into Peter’s chest as he gently tickled her.

“Aw there’s that smile! As well as some adorable giggles!” He teased, gently lifting her arm and scribbling gently under it, causing Y/N to squeal and cover her armpit, her giggles getting louder and louder.

“You’re so ticklish, it’s precious!” Peter grinned before bursting into hysterical giggles himself. Y/N looked up to see Thor digging into his ribs. “The younger one may be ticklish, but I believe she needs to be aware that the man of spiders is also just as sensitive.” Thor replied with a causal smile before gently jellyfishing Y/N’s knee, making her kick out a little and giggle. “Remember that, young one.” He smiled before heading to the kitchen.

An hour later, Y/N’s confidence grew around the rest of the Avengers. She let Bruce show her around his lab, and Bruce even engaged in some pretend play where the lab was a doctors surgery. But Y/N was too ticklish to even let Bruce press down on her belly so it just resulting in the two of them messing around. She was now in the gym, watching Steve do some sparring with a punch bag.

She quietly approached him, pressing a few punches against another bag which soon caught Steve’s attention. He smiled and turned to give her his full attention.

“You seem like a little fighter, huh?” Steve smiled as Y/N attempted to look like she was the strongest kid around. “Go on then, attack me, I won’t hurt you.” Steve reassured, and was soon faced with a screaming Y/N, who ran towards him in an attempt to tackle him.

Of course, Steve played along and threw himself to the ground so he was laying on his back, resulting in Y/N sitting on his belly and playfully and gently punching his chest.

“POW! POW! POW! POW!” She yelled as she made each punch, which to Steve just felt like a poke, but he played along and grunted with each punch until he decided to suddenly lift her up, throwing and catching her a few times before laying her down and gently digging into her ribs.

“You may be incredibly strong, but no one can beat the tickle monster!” Steve grinned as he nuzzled his face into her belly, making nomming noises as he pretended to eat her, causing the six year old to squeal with laughter. “Nohohohoho, Cahahahap!” She laughed out, taking the nickname her uncle mentions when he’s talking about him.

“Who’s Cap? I’m the tickle monster!” He grinned, grabbing one of her kicking legs and gently tickling her foot, causing her to squeal with laughter and cave into the tickles. Steve smirked and then held her bridal style, shaking his head into her tummy and blowing raspberries into the sensitive skin which made Y/N shriek with laughter. Eventually, Steve let up, kissing her nose and standing her up.

A little while later, Y/N found Clint in the vents, which resulted in a game of hide and seek, Clint giggled as he heard Y/N hold back her giggles from his teasing ‘I’m coming to find yoooou!’ Teases. Eventually, Clint snuck up behind her and tickled her legs playfully, which made their housemates wonder what the heck was going on which the constant clanging sounds.

A few hours later after dinner Y/N was in her pyjamas getting ready for bed, she stayed in her room and played with her bear before hearing a knock on the door. It was Nat, the one person Y/N was most nervous to talk to. Mainly because of what she’s seen her do, and for some reason being the only girl on the team made her seem more intimidating.

“Hey you. Uncle Tony sent me up to braid your hair so it doesn’t get all knotty.” She smiled gently as she sat cross legged on Y/N’s bed, patting her lap as Y/N hesitantly climbed on, holding her bear close to her.

“Who’s this then?” Nat asked as she shook the bears paw, determined to make conversation with the little girl. There was a few moments of silence before Y/N mumbled out the bears name out.

“Natasha... I named her after you. Nattie for short.” She replied, not noticing Natasha’s face light up with a bright smile on her face. “You named your favourite bear after me?” She asked to double check that she heard right. When Y/N nodded, she was engulfed in a hug. Nat had swayed them both to and caused them both to fall on their side.

“And there was me thinking you were scared of me!” Nat grinned, still hugging her as she scribbled her nails into Y/N’s sides, making her squeal with giggles as she squirmed in Nat’s arms.

“But you know I’m actually a nice person who loves to tickle sweet kids like you!” She grinned, peppering kisses all over Y/N’s cheeks whilst fluttering her nails into the bare skin of Y/N’s belly which was showing from her pyjama top riding up, causing her to laugh louder.

Nat leaned up to watch Y/N with a fond smile as she continued to gently tickle her all over, just wanting to adopt her at that moment, but her thoughts soon slowed to a halt as Tony poked Nat’s side, causing her to jump and squeal.

“I appreciate you tickling my niece into exhaustion, but it’s my turn with her now.” Tony chuckled fondly as Nat rolled her eyes and kissed Y/N’s cheek.

“See you tomorrow, munchkin.” She smiled before leaving the two in peace. Y/N looked up at Tony with a huge grin on her face, opening her arms for a hug, which Tony happily obliged.

“Thank you for letting me meet the Avengers.” She whispered as she hugged Tony, causing him to kiss her cheek and tuck her into bed with Nattie the bear.

“You’re very welcome, kiddo, sleep tight.” Tony smiled, doing their usual nose nuzzle before leaving her to sleep, knowing that she had touched the hearts of every single person in the building.

#mcu tickle fic #mcu tickle #avengers tickle fic #avengers tickle #ticklish!reader #ticklish!peter #ler!peter #ler!tony #ler!steve #ler!thor #ler!clint #ler!nat #ler!bruce

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arrow-guy · 4 years

Text

Talk to Me

Original request from @scrawlingwithstyle: Here's a request I've been sitting on for a bit. ClintxReader; Clint is deaf and most people rely on his lipreading skills, but Reader knows some ASL from when her family thought her autistic younger sibling would never speak (they became vocal close to seven years old). They have secret conversations across the room, thinking no one else on the team understands. . . . They're wrong. Adjust however you like!

A/N: Okay, it’s taken probably close to a year to actually get around to this, but i kind of breezed through writing it? And it was a whole bunch of fun to finally put down in a document. I didn’t change much about your request, but I definitely added to it, and made it a little romantic? Idk if it’ll come off as romance, it’s kind of goofy (it’s Clint, there needs to be a goof somewhere.) I really hope you like it, though!!

Page dividers by @carryonmyswansong

Pairing: ClintxReader

Word Count: 5.5k

Warnings: None

“Are you sure about this, Bruce?” I ask. “Ross let me go as soon as you went AWOL. I haven’t worked with people like this in years.”

“Of course I’m sure! You were the best back in the day.”

“Back in the day,” I laugh. “You make it sound like we’re ancient.”

“We’re not as young as we used to be,” he says. “But that’s the point. You’ll bring some much needed experience to the table.”

“But I’m not a spy and I definitely don’t have any powers.”

“Trust me, (Y/N), superpowers are not all they’re cracked up to be, and both spies have long since ceased their spying activities.” I cock one eyebrow and he laughs. “For the most part.”

“Saying a spy stopped being a spy is like saying you misplaced the hulk.”

“Ah, very true.”

“I’ll do it, though.”

“You will?”

“Well I can’t very well leave you to fend for yourself, now can I? As it stands, I’m already a shitty friend, working together can’t hurt things.”

Bruce grins and grips my shoulder. “I’ll see you Monday, then.”

I roll my eyes, but can’t fight back my smile. “Do I need to pack a bag, or will I be allowed to go home at the end of the day?”

“Not sure yet. Might as well bring a change of clothes and a toothbrush just in case.”

“Alright, then. I’ll see you Monday.”

“I can’t believe you actually pulled it off, Banner,” Stark says. “You wrangled a counselor for the team?”

“What,” I say. “Like it was supposed to be hard?”

Bruce laughs and reaches out to place his hand on my shoulder. “I’ve known (Y/N) for just about as long as I can remember. I’m sure she’ll be a good fit.”

“As long as you can remember, huh?” I look past Captain Rogers and find a sandy haired man. He grins when I meet his eyes. “Just how long?”

I bob my head from side to side. “Somewhere between twenty years and most of our lives.”

He whistles. “Pretty long time, then.”

“Mhm.”

Bruce clears his throat. “I’m sure (Y/N) wants to see where she’ll be working, so I’ll just show her to her office.”

Everyone in the boardroom waves and Bruce leads me out of the room. As soon as we’re out in the hall I sigh and bow my head, finally able to let my shoulders relax.

“That was a lot.”

Bruce chuckles. “Trust me, it’ll either get worse or stay exactly the same as time goes on, depending on who you’re talking to.”

“The blond guy who spoke up, that’s Hawkeye, right?”

“Clint Barton, yeah.”

“Will I be seeing much of him?”

“I’m not sure. I don’t really know much about the guy. He seems pretty happy-go-lucky and stable most of the time, though.”

“Huh.” I shrug and hitch my bag a little higher on my shoulder. “You never know with some people.”

“True. I’m sure you’ll deal with him at least once more after this. He’s the curious type.”

“I guess I’ll have to look forward to that, then.”

Bruce hummed in agreement and leads me to the elevator bank and takes me down to what will eventually be my office. He gives me a basic rundown of the facilities and shows me which restroom is closest to my office. I ask for a baseline reading on everyone on the team and Bruce rattles off what he’s noticed about the main five.

“Steve will most likely drop by to make small talk, but it may take some time for him to open up in any way that counts. Tony will joke about therapy, but once he warms up to you it’ll be impossible to get him to leave.”

“Oof, that bad?”

“He’s long-winded.”

“Then I guess I’ll have to enforce appointments with him when he starts to take interest.”

“Probably wise.”

“And Natasha?”

“I doubt you’ll see much of her. She has her ways of working through her issues on her own.”

“Do they involve murder?”

“Don’t know, and I don’t care to.”

“Got it. None of our business. I’ll let her come to me if she needs anything.” I plop down behind my new desk. “What about Thor?”

“Who knows. He shows up when he wants and tends to be a pretty jovial guy.”

“Ah. Is there anyone else outside of the tower I can expect?”

“Wanda, Sam, and Rhodey will be around from time to time. If Steve has his way, Bucky will move in at some point, and Wanda is currently in the process of moving into the tower, so you may see her more after that. I’m not sure how often she’ll drop by. She’s fairly private due to her powers.”

“Energy manipulation, right?”

He nods. “That, and other mind tricks.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

“But that just leaves Clint, and we’ve already gone over what you can expect from him.”

“It doesn’t just leave Clint, Bruce.” I fold my hands on the desktop. “I expect to see you in here at least once a week. Ideally twice.”

Bruce scowls. “(Y/N), you know how I feel about that.”

“Yeah, well, I listen to your opinions on that stuff when I’m just your friend. Now I’m your therapist, and you’re going to listen to me because I know what works for you. So I expect you to get your pasty ass in here when you’re scheduled.”

“You’re making appointments for me now?”

“Until I’m sure you’ll come to me on your own, yes.”

He rolls his eyes. “Fine. Send me the schedule. I’ll see you at my appointed time.”

“Wonderful.” I relax my shoulders, letting my professional mask slip. “Thanks for this, Bruce. I mean it.”

“I know you do.” He cracks a smile. “You’re the only person I trust to get to the root of our issues.”

“I appreciate that. I’ll try not to let you down.”

“Believe me, (Y/N), if anyone’s gonna let me down, it’ll be the team.” I laugh and he heads for the door. “I’ll see you later. Good luck with your first day.”

“Thanks, Bruce. I’ll see you later!”

“So, (Y/N),” Tony says, spreading out on the couch across from my chair. “What’s your deal?”

“My deal?”

“Yeah, what makes you tick? What motivates you to try and heal the fragile minds of the Avengers?”

“I’d say a decent paycheck is a pretty good motivator, Mr. Stark.”

He seems disappointed with my answer. “Is that it?”

“Well, that, and I want to make sure Bruce is doing alright. He’s struggled with therapy in the past, and I want to make sure he’s getting the kind of help that he needs.”

“I see.” He presses his lips together and folds his arms. “You’re not even curious about the rest of the team?”

“Of course I’m curious, but nothing discussed in this tower will be shared with anyone outside. I take my patients privacy very seriously.”

“You sure you don’t just fear for your life?”

“Living in New York, I fear for my life constantly. That doesn’t mean that I’m worried about getting merced if I get a little loose lipped outside of work.” I sigh and lean back in my chair. “That being said, I won’t be sharing your confidential information with anyone you haven’t specifically given authorized access to your records.”

“Huh.”

“Yeah. It’s almost like I’m a professional, right?”

He smiles. “I’m really starting to like you, (Y/N).”

“Then I guess I have a lot more of this to look forward to, then, don’t I?”

I laughs and hauls himself up from the couch. “We’ll see.”

I make a note of his response in my open document. “Sounds like a tentative yes to me, Mr. Stark, and I’ll be here so long as you deem my services necessary.”

He nods and exits my office. He leaves the door open.

“How are you liking it here so far, (Y/N)?”

“It’s been quiet, Captain Rogers. It’s a bit like pulling teeth trying to get anyone to make use of their resources.”

“I guess it would be. We’re a relatively private bunch.” He pauses a moment. “And, please, call me Steve.”

“Right, Steve. Is there anything that I can do for you today?” I ask. “It’s entirely alright if you just want to make small talk.”

“Oh, well, uh…” He awkwardly clears his throat and shifts uncomfortably on the couch. “I guess I just wanted to get a lay of the land.”

“I understand.” I glance around my office. “I should probably bring in some art and plants. Make it a little less sterile in here.”

Steve laughs. “That might help.”

I smile. “Maybe an area rug?”

He shrugs. “Whatever you think would be best.”

“I appreciate the creative freedom.” I close my laptop, set it to the side, and settle back in my chair. “Is there something on your mind, Steve?”

“No,” he says quickly. He immediately looks conflicted. “I… well, kind of.”

“Feel free to speak. Nothing you say will leave this office.”

“You hardly know me.”

I shrug. “I know how stressful this environment can be. And, while your team is very good at what they do, they’re also the ones who are causing your stress.”

“I don’t know if I’d say that.” I watch him chew the inside of his cheek. “I guess I’m just concerned that things might not get better, even when Bucky’s moved in.”

“Why’s that?”

“I don’t know. I’m worried that it might not be a good fit for him, or that the team won’t accept him, or that he might not even want to be around me.”

“Those are all valid concerns. Have you mentioned any of this to him?”

“God no. I don’t want to stress him out more than I already have with all of this moving business.”

“I might suggest bringing it up. He might be having similar worries himself, and, as helpful as it is to work towards what’s troubling you with me, I won’t be able to settle your nerves.”

“Maybe you’re right…”

“If nothing else, it might open up a new line of communication between the two of you, which couldn’t hurt.”

Steve stays for another hour, just talking. When he leaves, he asks if I want the door open or closed. I don’t give him a definite answer and he leaves it open, just a crack. I laugh and start on his profile.

Someone knocks on my door and I glance up from my paperwork to see Clint standing in the doorway.

“Mr. Barton,” I say. “I was wondering when I might see you.”

He shrugs. “Here I am.”

“After two weeks, I was starting to think you were avoiding me.”

“If I was?”

“Then it’s none of my business.”

The corner of his mouth lifts in a smile. “I like that answer.”

I rise from my desk and gesture to the couch. He raises his eyebrows, but takes a seat anyway. I sit across from him and watch as he tries to decide just how he should sit. In the end, he leans heavily on his knees. Nothing about him is relaxed.

“I’m starting to think Bruce was wrong about you.”

“What’d the green bean tell you about me?”

“Nothing concrete,” I answer. “He just mentioned that you seem to have a positive outlook on things most of the time.”

He snorts. “Great.”

“Mmm, I see. It’s a facade, then?”

He frowns and presses a finger to his right ear. “Could you say that again?”

“I said, it’s a facade, then?”

“Sometimes.”

I nod. “Interesting.”

He barks out a laugh. “Yeah, interesting.”

I watch him look around the room, examining the art on the walls and the stacks of paper on my desk. When he turns his head to the left, I notice his purple earpiece and something suddenly clicks. He tilts his head to the side when he sees me staring.

“What?”

“Would it be easier if we signed?” I ask, signing along as I speak.

He looks surprised. “You sign?”

I laugh. “Yes. My little brother is on the Autism spectrum. When he was a kid, he was almost entirely nonverbal. Mom taught him sign, and the rest of the family learned along with him.”

“That must’ve been really nice for him.”

“It was nice to be able to communicate with him when he couldn’t vocalize what he wanted to say. He eventually started speaking when he was about seven, though.”

“And you still held onto the signing skills?”

“Of course! It’s not like he just, bam, started talking. It was a long process, and he still has nonverbal days sometimes.” Clint starts to actually smile and it warms my heart. “It’s come in handy in my particular line of work too. Deaf and hard of hearing folks need counsellors and therapists too.”

“Which brings the topic of conversation back to me.” He shakes his head and leans back against the couch and signs, “You’re a tricky one, (Y/N).”

“I’m not tricky!”

“Then what?”

“I’m accommodating.” I speak again, but continue to sign along. “You don’t have to tell me everything, or anything, really. But I’m here to help, if you need me.”

“Thank you.”

“Of course, Clint. Any time.”

“Seems like you and Clint are getting close,” Bruce says.

“I don’t know what you mean, man.”

“He’s in here all the time, (Y/N). There’s no way Barton needs therapy five times a week.”

“It’s not always about therapy, Bruce. I strive to make my office a safe space where everyone knows that they can speak freely. He knows that he can come here and chill out without worrying about the rest of the team.”

“Barton doesn’t really worry about anything, though.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure of that.”

Bruce stares at me, eyes narrowed, and snaps his fingers. "You like him."

I roll my eyes. "I do not like him, Bruce. And you're not even here to talk about Clint, you're here to work on yourself and managing your stress levels."

He rolls his eyes. "I'm sure there's something we could talk about aside from me."

I sigh and hold my head in my hands. "I've been here for two months. I haven't been around long enough to form anything more than tentative relationships with the rest of the team. I'm more concerned about whether or not they can open up to me than I am with my love life."

“Right,” Bruce clears his throat.

“Thank you.” He looks thoroughly ashamed and I have to laugh. “I appreciate the interest, but it’s just not something that you need to worry about.”

“No, I understand.” He smiles and shrugs. “I guess I just miss having that easy rapport with you.”

“I mean, we still have that, Bruce. It’s just not something that I want to talk about in the workplace. It’s one thing to shoot the shit over lunch on a Saturday, it’s another to discuss my patients with another patient, all of whom are my coworkers.”

“I didn’t think about it like that.”

I smile. “It’s fine. Did you want to pick up where we left off on Tuesday?”

“Yeah, sounds good.”

“(Y/N)?”

I’m startled by the woman in the doorway. “Ms. Romanoff?”

She shakes her head and steps into my office. “As long as you’re not a government official, it’s just Natasha.”

“Ah, right.” I sit a little straighter in my chair. “What can I do for you, Natasha?”

“Clint’s said you’ve helped him a lot.”

“I don’t know about that. We just talk. He does all the helping.”

“I figured you’d say that.” She moves quickly across the room and takes a seat on the couch. “I’d like to talk to you, if you have the time.”

“Oh.” I scramble up from my desk to sit across from her. “What about?”

“I need help working through a recent case.”

“Are you sure I’m qualified for that?”

“Well, you said Clint does all the helping. Maybe what I need is a sounding board.”

“Fair enough. Where are you caught up?”

Natasha rattles off the details of a recent mission. I do my best to follow her, but she loses me when she starts explaining the intricacies of a piece of Hydra technology they discovered. Eventually, she perks up, almost looking like she wants to jump up from her seat and run from the room.

“I think I’ve got it.”

“That’s great!”

She calmly gets to her feet and walks to the door. “Thank you, (Y/N).”

I shake my head. “It was my pleasure.”

“Even so, you helped me.” She flashes me an unexpected smile. “I appreciate that.”

“It’s not a problem, Natasha. I hope that we can speak again at some point.”

She nods and heads for the door. “I’ll see you around.”

In the hall I hear, “Oh, hey, Nat.” and Clint pokes his head in soon after.

I smile. “Hey.”

“Hey.” He leans in the doorway and folds his arms. “What’d Nat dump on you?”

“Doctor patient confidentiality, Barton,” I say. “I can’t tell you.”

His arms fall to his side and he dramatically slumps into the room. “I thought you trusted me!”

I laugh. “I do trust you, Clint. But it’s not my information to give.” He drapes himself across the couch and grins at the sight of me fighting back my smile. “If it were, Bruce would have full access to what we talk about in our sessions.”

“That’s private information, (Y/N)!” He laughs. “I see your point.”

“Good.”

“Did you want to grab lunch later? That weird little cafe down the street started serving some kind of coffee burger.”

“Ugh, and you want to eat that?”

“(Y/N), it’s a coffee burger.”

“With all the heinous shit you put in your body, it’s a wonder you’re still alive.”

“If you think I’m bad, you should meet my dog.”

“Is that an offer?”

“Maybe.” He shrugs. “Guess you’ll have to stick around long enough to find out.”

I roll my eyes. “It’s been four months, Clint. If I haven’t run for the hills yet, I’m pretty sure it’s not gonna happen for a while yet.”

Something twinkles in his eyes. “That’s good to hear. I was worried I might scare you off.”

“If anyone were to scare me off, it’d be Tony.” I shake my head. “That man is a handful.”

“What happened to patient confidentiality?”

“Since when is Tony being a handful a secret?” He laughs and I relax in my seat. “But, yeah, I’ll get lunch with you.”

“Really?”

“Someone has to make sure you don’t keel over from physically eating coffee.”

“Oh come on! It’s not like they solidified the coffee and stuck it on a bun!”

“How do you know they didn’t? Maybe they turned the coffee into jello, passed it through a meat grinder, and threw it on a griddle.”

His face scrunches up in disgust. “Ugh, that’d just be burnt coffee.”

“I’ve watched you drink an entire pot of burnt coffee.”

“Desperate times, (Y/N). They call for desperate measures.”

I sigh and shake my head. ”I guess it’s fine, so long as you’re not addicted to caffeine pills.”

“Those don’t do anything for me.”

“That’s terrifying.”

He laughs, hauls himself up from the couch, and offers me a hand. “Shall we?”

“Shall we what?”

“Head out for lunch.”

“Now? I thought you said later.”

“It’s been like five minutes. It’s later now.”

I laugh. “I can’t just go now. I have an appointment with Steve in twenty minutes. We can leave after that.”

He pouts. “Fine.”

“Don’t give me that look, Clint!”

He sighs and trudges towards the door. “I guess I’ll just have to make a reservation for one thirty.”

“That’d be great.”

He flashes a brilliant smile before disappearing out into the hall. I shake my head and move back to my desk.

“That man is gonna get me in trouble.”

“I thought you said you weren’t involved with Clint?”

“I’m not, Bruce.”

“Then what’s this?” He places his phone on my keyboard.

I pick up the phone and find an article titled “Hawkeye’s New Flame, or Just a Fling?” pulled up. A picture of Clint and I at lunch the other day sits just below a paragraph speculating who I could be. I snort and hand him his phone.

“Clint and I went to lunch. That’s all.” I sit back and fold my arms. “What’s the problem, Bruce?”

“I don’t want you getting dragged into some kind of media storm because you work with us.”

“It’s one article!”

“There’s at least four more like it that I’ve seen.”

“I’m not worried about it, Bruce. Clint just went out for lunch and some pap caught us talking. That’s it. There’s nothing more to it, but I can’t stop people from talking.”

“You shouldn’t have to deal with it.”

“No one should have to deal with anyone plastering their personal life all over the internet, but you know what? I’d rather get caught out in public with Clint than Tony.” I laugh. “Can you imagine the shitstorm that’d kick up if that happened?”

Bruce tries not to laugh. “I guess you’re right.”

“It was bound to get out that the Avengers brought in a counsellor at some point. It’s better that it’s like this instead of some media outlet picking up a rumor and deciding that you’re all unstable.”

“Well…”

“I’m not saying you’re the most sane bunch, but that’s no one’s business but yours. Regardless, don’t worry about this. It’ll be fine.”

“Alright.” He pockets his phone. “You’d tell me if something was wrong, right?”

“Of course I would, Bruce. If something comes up, I’ll let you know.”

I sit on the floor of the gym and lift the collar of my shirt to wipe the sweat from my face.

Clint plops down on the floor beside me and tips his head to the side.

“Definitely didn’t expect to find you in here,” he says.

“What, I can’t work out?” I groan and lay back. “Ugh.”

“You okay?”

“No. I knew I should’ve just stuck to the treadmill.”

“What’d you do to yourself?”

“Weights.”

He laughs. “Why did you do that?”

“I don’t know. Is wanting to be able to lift a very large dog a good reason?”

“I wouldn’t say it’s a bad reason.” He lays beside me and props himself up on his elbow. “I could help you, if you want.”

“I don’t know how I feel about being all sweaty gross around you.”

He pokes my stomach and I laugh and shift away. “I don’t know, (Y/N), sweaty’s the new sexy.”

“Aw, that’s sweet.” I laugh and scrunch my nose. “Also kind of gross.”

“Sweet and kind of gross, I think you’ve pretty much summed me up perfectly.” I laugh so hard that I snort and he grins. “So, do you want help working out?”

I press my fist to my mouth to quiet my giggling. “If you’re willing to, I really would appreciate it.”

“Then it’s a done deal.” I thank him and his smile softens. “Sorry about those articles last week, by the way.”

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it.”

“I should’ve warned you, at least. I’m used to it, but you didn’t sign up for pap shots and gossip columns when you took this job.”

I scowl. “Honestly, Clint. If you’re not gonna read my lips, read my hands. It’s totally fine. I don’t care. I had a nice time at lunch. A few dumb articles won’t change that.”

“You mean that?”

“Well, yeah. I like spending time with you outside of all of this,” I say, gesturing to the tower in general. “With, y’know, no expectations of maintaining all of the professional bullshit.”

“Pretty sure you’re the most professional one here.”

“Thanks, I’m glad that comes across in the day to day, but do you understand what I’m saying? Like I genuinely do not care about what a shitty news outlet says. At the end of the day, the only opinions that matter are ours.” I sigh and settle on the floor. “Sorry.”

“Sounds like we’re not the only ones who need therapy.”

I hum. “Maybe I do.”

“No shame in it.”

I smile at him. “I know.” I sit up and get to my feet. “It’s getting late, I should head out.”

“You’re in tomorrow, right?”

“Yeah, I’ll be around till noon. I’ve got a wedding later in the day.”

“Not yours, right?”

I laugh. “No, definitely not mine.”

“Cool,” He smiles up at me. “Then I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Since when do we have staff meetings?” Clint asks.

“Since we brought on a counselor,” Tony says.

I frown. “I’ve been here six months and I’ve never been to any kind of meeting.”

“I’m going to ignore the fact that you brought that up and just keep moving with the meeting.”

I snort and shoot Clint a look. He laughs and signs for me to stop. I wave him off and turn my attention back to the head of the table.

Tony rambles on for about half an hour before Steve cuts in and the two of them start going back and forth. They bicker for twenty minutes before Thor swans in, greeting everyone with his bright, booming voice. I was stuck in my office the last time he was on Earth, so our paths never had a chance to cross. Steve takes a moment to introduce the two of us and Thor vigorously shakes my hand, unintentionally jostling me around the whole time. He takes his seat on the other side of Bruce and the conversation picks up again.

I catch Clint’s eye twitching in my peripheral when Thor speaks a little too loudly. I gesture to get his attention and he raises his eyebrows when he meets my eyes.

“You good?” I sign.

He nods. “Can’t pay attention to save my life in these meetings.”

“I’ve never known anyone to compliment your attention span.”

He mouths, “Oh, ha ha,” and I laugh.

“You’re mean, (Y/N).”

“And here I thought you liked me.”

“Never said I didn’t.” He grins. “The way things are going, I’d say you’re probably just my type.”

I shake my head and hide my smile behind my hand. “Stop.”

“Aw, you're cute when you're embarrassed." I flip him off and he laughs. “That's a compliment!"

I snort. “Pay attention, Clint.”

We manage to make it through another hour and, by that time, someone has turned off the lights and started giving a presentation. I fold my arms on the table and rest my chin on top and beg myself to stay awake through this meeting. I’m sure it’ll only be a little while longer.

Clint’s hand creeps into my line of sight and he taps the table to get my attention. I shoot him a quizzical look and he lifts his eyebrows.

“You still with us?” he signs.

“No.”

“It’s going longer than I thought it would.”

“I’m honestly about to fall asleep.”

“Aw, (Y/N), no.”

“This is how I go out. Avenge me, Clint.”

“No!”

“It’s your job. You have to.”

“But who will help me through the trauma?”

I cover my mouth to muffle my laughter. “I’d be dead, that’s none of my concern.”

He shakes his head. “And you call yourself my friend.”

Natasha clears her throat, startling me away from the conversation. I try to pay attention to the presentation, but I just can't wrap my head around what they're talking about and Clint easily distracts me again.

"Quick question."

Surprised, I sign, "Shoot."

"Would you want to go out with me?"

My brain stops working for a second. "Wait, what?"

"I said, will you go out with me?"

My heart hammers in my chest. "Like as friends, or on a date?"

He sighs. "We've been hanging out as friends for months now. I'm asking you on a date, stupid."

My face heats and I sit back in my seat. “Oh.”

He laughs. “Did I break you?”

“A little.” I frown.

“Just say yes!”

Startled, I glance up the table, only to find Natasha glaring at Clint and I. Everyone is looking at us and I suddenly want to disappear.

“What’s the problem?” Steve asks.

“I’m sick of watching the two of them flirt with each other,” Natasha says. “You’ve been mooning over each other for months. Just say yes and be done with it.”

“Nat, they haven’t said a single thing since the beginning of the meeting.”

“They’ve been signing at each other the entire meeting.” She looks directly at me and signs, “I see everything.”

“Sorry.”

“Just say yes.” She looks very pointedly between Clint and I. “You’d be good together.”

“I thought you said you didn’t like him!” Bruce says.

“That was months ago, Bruce. Things change.”

“Don’t be hard on her,” Natasha says. “Clint’s an acquired taste.”

“I’m just gonna, um…” I gesture to the door. “I’m just gonna go.”

I see Tony and Steve nod and I shove my chair back from the table and make my escape. The door shuts behind me, and I’m free. I sigh, relieved to be free of the weight of everyone’s eyes on me, only for the embarrassment of having my crush exposed to my coworkers to settle deep in my stomach.

I press my fingertips to my temples and walk down the hallway. “I knew he was gonna get me in trouble.”

I make the decision to just go back to my office. Maybe I can at least get some work done or, at the very least calm down. I turn as the elevator doors close and catch a glimpse of the conference door opening at the end of the hall. I shift slightly so that it’s not in my line of sight.

The elevator ride feels like it’s too long and I immediately flop down on my couch as soon as I’m in my office. I can't get comfortable and shift around until I'm upside down with my legs over the back of the conch, staring at the ceiling. I press the heels of my hands over my eyes and groan out of frustration.

“I left without even answering him,” I mutter.

The door suddenly opens and I freeze, pulling my hands away from my face, waiting for whoever it is to announce themselves.

"(Y/N)?"

"Clint?" I try to sit up and smack my head on the edge of the coffee table. "Shit."

"Are you okay?" he asks.

I rub my forehead and sit up a little more carefully. "I'll live."

He takes a seat on the coffee table and watches intently as I sit upright on the couch and face him. He reaches out and gently touches my forehead, only to jerk his hand back when I wince.

"Sorry."

"Don't, it's fine."

"Okay." He sighs softly and shuffles awkwardly on the table. He stills when I touch his knee and takes my hand in his. "I'm sorry about the meeting. I shouldn't have put you on the spot like that."

"Honestly, Clint, you don't need to apologize," I murmur. "I got flustered and then embarrassed when everyone else got involved."

"I know. I probably like pushing your buttons a little too much."

"That's not it."

"But I do push your buttons."

"Yeah, but only 'cause I let you." He smiles and I squeeze his hand. "But I'm a deeply private person. To have Natasha butt in like that, no matter the good she meant by it, really set me on edge."

"I had no idea."

"I don't feel like I have to keep everything close to my chest when I’m with you. You tease me, but it’s never from a place of malice and you know me well enough that you never take it too far.”

“I mean, you give as good as you get.” He doesn’t meet my eyes as he runs his thumb over my knuckles. “But still. I should’ve just asked in private, but you know me.”

“Yeah. You’re sweet, but kind of stupid sometimes. More than a little impulsive. And way too fond of coffee.”

“Aw, I thought that was endearing!” He smiles when I laugh. “The invitation still stands, but you don’t have to say yes.”

“What’re you talking about?” He meets my eyes and I shake my head. “I’m not about to turn you down. You haven’t introduced me to your dog yet.”

“Oh, I get it, you only want me for Lucky.”

“Mhm.”

He shakes his head and kneels on the floor in front of me. “Shoulda known.”

“I know, I’m pure evil.” He grins and takes my face in his hands. “I should be fired, right?”

“Without a doubt.”

I hum softly and lean forward to bump my nose against his. After a moment’s hesitation, Clint closes the distance between us and gently kisses me. I place one hand on his forearm and tilt my head to the side to kiss him back. He smiles against my lips and pulls away, his eyes flitting over my face.

“So… about that dog.”

I have no idea what would happen to them after that, but I’d like to think they’re having a great time, petting dogs and continuing to mess with each other, all whilst falling in love.

I’d love to know what you guys thought of this little one shot. Did you love it, did you hate it? Did you breathe out through your nose a little bc you kind of laughed but also didn’t? Be sure to like, reblog, comment, or shoot me an ask and tell me all about it!

If you’d like to be tagged in future fics, please let me know!

Tag list:

@ghostlyhamlet, @claws-of-vibranium, @creaturefeatures101, @buckysendoftheline, @imagine-assembling-the-avengers, @ptprocrastination, @1950schick, @amayasymone23, @arfrona-and-marvel, @ek823, @fanaticfangirl001, @furrywerewolfcollector, @kissofvenom922, @dawn-phantomhive, @fangirlwithasweettooth, @mairhof1, @starryeyesbadguys, @trap-house-homiecide, @buckywhitewolfbarnes, @kaepm981, @howdoesoneadult, @pcdmesamidala, @thefandomplace, @sian22redux, @skeletoresinthebasement, @lady-thor-foster, @jazzcutie, @gaytonystark, @geeksareunique, @nyxveracity, @breezy1415, @feelmyroarrrr, @darling-loki, @lemonadeorange73, @princess-unicorn124, @hermionie-is-my-queen, @tofeartheunknown, @queenoftheunderdark, @avengerscompound

#clint bartonxreader #readerxclint barton #clint barton x reader #reader x clint barton #clintbartonxreader #readerxclintbarton #clint barton #hawkeye #reader insert marvel fic #my perfect birdie boy

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peppersonironi · 4 years

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Batfam/Avengers Crossover Chapter One: Arrival

Yo, this has been on Ao3 for a while and people seem to really love it, So I thought I’d post it here! Chapter below the cut.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Category: Gen Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types Relationships: Selina Kyle/Bruce Wayne, Natasha Romanov & Damian Wayne, Clint Barton & Cassandra Cain, Tim Drake & Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Tim Drake & Duke Thomas, Pamela Isley/Harleen Quinzel, Tim Drake/Kon-El | Conner Kent, Dick Grayson/Wally West, Roy Harper/Koriand'r/Jason Todd, Characters: Bruce Wayne, Selina Kyle, Jason Todd, Dick Grayson, Tim Drake, Damian Wayne, Cassandra Cain, Stephanie Brown, Barbara Gordon, Justice League (DCU), Alfred Pennyworth, Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanov (Marvel), Clint Barton, Thor (Marvel), Bruce Banner, Peter Parker, Alfred the Cat (DCU), Bat-Cow (DCU), Goliath (DCU), Selina Kyle's Cat Isis, Kate Kane (DCU), Duke Thomas, Additional Tags: Batbrothers (DCU), Avengers Meet The Batfam, MCU/Batfam crossover, Crossover, no beta we die like robins, rated T for Jason's language, I bleeped it out though. Just to be safe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, canon? What's canon?, Deaf Clint Barton,Deaf Character, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Happy Batfamily (DCU), Birdflash and joyfire are implied/referenced,

Summary:

The Avengers find themselves in an alternate universe where none of them exist. Instead, there is a different group of heroes: The Justice League. They decide to work together to get the Avengers home. But not not everything is instantaneous, so the Avengers need a place to stay. The only place available is Wayne Manor.

Que Batfamily shenanigans!

Multi-chapter fanfic, with some one shots that go along with the plot thrown in.

Notes:

This is my first time writing anything with the Avengers - especially a deaf!clint - and the Batfam, so I apologize if anything is doc. Constructive criticism is appreciated!

This is mainly comic DCU with Movie Avengers (Set after the first avengers movie, plus Spiderman, cause I can ;-)

Crack! Bang! There was a flash of blindingly bright light, followed by a huge explosion.

"Wha- where are we?"

Tony Stark looked over to Peter who had been the first to speak. Crap, the kid had come here too. But wherever here was, he did not know.

Tony, Steve, Hulk, Thor, Clint, Peter, and Natasha stood in a loose clump at the center of a smoking crater. The sky was cloudy and dark, and they appeared to be at least five miles outside of a big city, judging from the buildings in the distance. There was also a highway filled with streaming cars a couple of miles to Tony’s right.

“This isn’t right,” He muttered, opening his faceplate. Where were the sunny tropical trees that housed the compound of Anagnorisis - weird name, he knew - who was some D-list villain who thought some slightly advanced tech made them a world-conqueror. But Tony was beginning to think that those guns were a bit stranger and more advanced than he had previously believed.

“Tell me about it,” replied Steve. “Any idea where we are? Was it some sort of teleportation gun that was shot at us? This looks nothing like the Amazon.”

Before anyone could speak, Tony received a notification. Multiple incoming objects were approaching, fast . With the exception of the second fastest, they seemed to be airborne. “Multiple incomings, perhaps hostile. Most are flying. And they aren’t missiles. I think people ? But -”

“Who are you?”

Suddenly the first object arrived, and Stark was right. It was a black haired man in a blue skin tight suit with a red “S” on it and a flowing red cape. It would look ridiculous if he wasn’t glaring daggers at the group while flying .

He was joined almost immediately by another man, this time wearing an all red bodysuit with a lightning bolt on the chest and cowl. He was not flying though. He stopped in front of them swinging his arms as lightning dissipated. He had run there.

Next came a woman dressed in the colors of the american flag, with golden cuffs, tiara, and lasso by her side. She came with a man in a green, white, and black skin tight suit with some sort of symbol - perhaps a lantern? - on his chest. He also wore a green ring and black domino mask with white lenses on his face. They were both joined by another, a split second later. This was by far the strangest arrival. He was completely bald, with green skin and red eyes. He wore navy blue pants and cape, with only a red “X” over his chest. All three were floating.

“Who are you?” The blue and red man repeated.

Tony scoffed. Was this guy serious? “We’re the Avengers, obviously.”

The group shared a look. “Is that some new kind of villain group? I swear to all that is good and holy if I need to deal with another group who think they can rule the world, I. Will. Quit.” This time the man who spoke was the runner.

Steve replied, confusion clear on his face. “We’re not villains! We’re the Avengers; Earth’s mightiest heroes!”

Instead of coming to their senses, the strangely dressed newcomers laughed .

“You do realize you are speaking to members of the Justice League?” The woman spoke, her lips pursed.

“The who now?”

“Be quiet Kid, we don’t know what we’re dealing with.” Tony spoke to Peter. He was getting more worried by the second. Something was seriously wrong.

“Dealing with?” The green dressed man frowned, clearly suspicious of the Avengers. He started to fidget with his ring. “Well, since you don’t seem to know, let me enlighten you.” He gestured to each of his companions. “Superman, son of Krypton. Wonder Woman, Amazonian Princess. The Flash, fastest man alive. Martian Manhunter, well, a martian. And Me, Green Lantern. Member of the Green Lantern Core.”

Well, that explained everything. Not.

“We do not know you, strangers.” Thor spoke this time. “Perhaps you leave us be, our green friend over here gets frustrated easily.” He pointed to Hulk, who was breathing heavily.

The green man - martian, apparently - spoke for the first time. “Not until you tell us who you are and why you are in a smoking crater near His city.”

“His?” Clint clearly did not like the way the martian spoke of this character. To be honest, Stark didn’t either.

This got the most surprised reactions from the five. They looked at each other, and Tony could have sworn there was a hint of fear in their faces.

“Oh, He is so not going to like that.” Green Lantern said.

“Combined with the fact that we ditched Him.” The Flash cringed. Then looked worried again. “Yo, green grape, you okay.

The Hulk’s breathing was growing heavier, his face contorted into that of utter rage.

“Uh-oh,” Steve said.

“I . . . Not . . . GRAPE!” Hulk roared as he charged the The Flash who nimbly dodged. Superman went down to intercede, and just got punched by the Hulk. Though it did not seem to physically bother him, he was clearly angry.

Tony shut his face plate and moved forward, intending to stop the fight, but he only got attacked by the martian. Peter jumped forward to help, and soon everyone was fighting.

Thor was pitted against the Wonder Woman, and they seemed evenly matched. Black Widow was against The flash, and despite his incredible speed she seemed to be almost winning. Both Hawkeye and Captain America were battling Green Lantern.

No one seemed to have the upper hand, which worried Tony. These people were tough. If they couldn’t beat them . . . he didn’t know what would happen.

Peter didn’t seem to share his worry though. He instead seemed to be having fun. Tony could tell the kid was smiling beneath his mask, and his body language screamed hyper and happy. He seemed to get that way whenever they fought together, and a small part of Tony was filled with a sense of parental pride.

The fight seemed endless, no one gaining traction. Until something incredible happened. Thor threw Mjolnir directly at his opponent, and instead of being knocked down like everyone else, she caught the hammer. Every Avenger - even the Hulk - immediately froze, catching the attention of the newcomers.

“This is a very well crafted weapon, though a bit clunky,” Wonder Woman said as she tossed the hammer from one hand to the other. She paused, seeing their reactions.

“You are worthy.” Thor spoke with disbelief and a tint of resignation in his voice.

“Pardon?” Superman spoke, his frown apparent.

“Only those worthy can lift Mjolnir - my hammer. She clearly can, which means that you are trustworthy.”

*****

Five minutes of somewhat confused conversation later, they had reached an uneasy truce. Neither spoke much at first, but they soon began to compare notes. Apparently They both believed themselves to be the protectors of Earth, which brought on a bout of argument before Peter stepped in.

“Woah hold on, calm down. Something is clearly up, so there’s no need to argue!”

Wonder Woman looked contemplative. “How old are you boy, you seem young.”

Peter bristled. “I’m 15, and I’ve been a superhero for a while now, so I’m not inexperienced!”

Green Lantern laughed. “That’s not what she met, kid. We aren’t going to tell you how old you need to be to fight crime. The amount of we work with, and some even younger than you . . .” He shook his head and laughed. Then he realised how he had sounded. “I mean, we don’t force them, it's up to each individual to make that choice for themselves. Well, with the mentor’s approval of course.”

Natasha furrowed her brows. “How young are some of these kids?” Tony knew she had a thing against child soldiers, so he wasn’t surprised she was disapproving.

Green Lantern looks to the Flash. “How old is Robin at this point? 9?”

Flash laughed. “Naw, that little devil is 11. He was very adamant on that fact when he threatened me with his katana.” He shook his head.

Green Lantern laughed. “Yeah, most of the others are teenagers. Robin is the youngest, and I’d say most deadly, but Red Hood . . .”

“The Dark Knight really does have a problem,” Flash said.

His last comment made Green Lantern freeze. They both looked at each other then turned to Peter.

“Kid, stay away from The Dark Knight.” Green Lantern says.

“Yeah, if He sees you, there’s no way you’ll ever leave.”

“He’s the most dangerous man on earth,” Green Lantern adds.

“Guys, stop. You’re scaring him.” Superman looks disappointedly at the two heroes who Tony pegged as the trouble makers of the group. This idea was further cemented in Tony when they started laughing. Despite this, he decided to keep Peter as far away from this supposed Dark Knight as possible.

“Speak of the devil, he’s on his way.” Superman says this with a smile, then he cringes. “And we’re going to get an earful alright. Ten minutes ahead of him is a big deal apparently.”

In a moment. Tony got an alert that something was approaching. Fast. Soon he saw a large black military type armoured car fly down the highway from the city and off the road. It zoomed toward them.

It was a sight indeed to see the menacing black car swerve and expertly stop a few yards from the group. The top opened and a dark form shot straight up before landing in a kneeling position in front of them. The figure rose, and Tony got the first good look at him. He was a tall man with a broad chest and shoulders, dresses in complete black. There was a bat-like symbol on his chest, also in black. He wore a cape that flowed around menacingly. His face was covered by a cowl with pointed ears, like that of an owl, or perhaps a bat. The only part of his costume that was not black was the dark gold utility belt at his waist. Altogether, he was utterly frightening.

Tony took a step forward, effectively blocking Peter, who scoffed.

“Batman,” Superman said, a smile on his face.

Batman fixed the most impressive and terrifying glare upon the man that Stark had ever seen. “You broke protocol by going ahead of me. You are in my territory Superman. And you know that I cannot fly or run at the speed of sound.” He fixed his glare on the rest of his group who all reacted with either flinches or sheepish shrugs.

Batman grunted before looking at the Avengers. He sized each of them up, staying longest on Stark. Tony felt as if his entire being was being stripped away under the scrutiny.

“Alternate Dimension jumpers, not by choice I’m assuming.”

He spoke so simply that it took a minute for Tony to react. Even then, the man was already on his way back to his car.

“We’re near Gotham, let’s regroup at the Cave.”

Tony didn’t know what this Cave was, but he wasn’t sure he liked it. “Are you the Dark Knight?” He asked, before he lost his nerve.

The man looked immediately at the Flash and Green Lantern, who looked both scared and amused. Their sheepish smirks and chuckles dissipated when Batman looked away and back to Tony.

“The Dark Knight, The World’s Greatest Detective, The Caped Crusader, The Batman. All are titles I have earned. See you at the cave.”

And with that he hopped in his car and sped off back toward the gloomy city beyond.

#Avengers Meet The Batfam #MCU/Batfam crossover #Batfam/Avengers Crossover #batfam #avengers #bruce wayne #tony stark #steve rogers #clint barton #natasha romanoff #bruce banner #thor odinson #peter parker #justice league #batman

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bulkyphrase · 3 years

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Everybody & the Avengers Team

I've got a new fic rec list for you!

The stories in the "X & the Avengers Team" tags focus on one person's relationship to the Avengers team as a whole. Courtesy of AO3's tag browse and Excel, here's a ranked list of the top 20 most popular pairings:

Tony Stark | 2470 total, 240 OTP

Peter Parker | 2255 total, 85 OTP

Steve Rogers | 602 total, 56 OTP

Loki | 387 total, 26 OTP

Natasha Romanov | 308 total, 35 OTP

Clint Barton | 268 total, 46 OTP

Bruce Banner | 244 total, 15 OTP

Thor | 209 total, 7 OTP

Avengers Team | 174 total, 24 OTP

James "Bucky" Barnes | 156 total, 7 OTP

Wanda Maximoff | 143 total, 4 OTP

Phil Coulson | 105 total, 9 OTP

Darcy Lewis | 91 total, 6 OTP

Matt Murdock | 60 total, 8 OTP

Sam Wilson | 53 total, 5 OTP

Nick Fury | 41 total, 5 OTP

Harry Potter | 40 total, 0 OTP

Pepper Potts | 31 total, 1 OTP

Vision | 29 total, 2 OTP

Stiles Stilinski | 25 total, 0 OTP

In chart form, if you like charts:

Notes:

The numbers after the names are the number of stories tagged with that ship. OTP means the number of stories where that is the only relationship tagged on the story. Numbers are accurate as of July 2021.

Story Recommendations

For your reading pleasure, included below is at least one fic rec for each pairing except the crossovers from non-Marvel fandoms (apologies to Mr. Potter & Mr. Stilinski). Most are gen fic, and even in the ones with a romantic pairing, romance is not the focus.

Tony Stark

As Subtle As Cognitive Recalibration by petroltogo (Teen, 8949) tumblr: @tonystarktogo

Standing inside his penthouse, listening to Rogers, Barton and Banner explain to Fury how they just happened to stumble over the Tesseract on a routine security check of Stark Tower’s roof and wouldn’t you know, they’ve managed to fight off the looming alien invasion before it could really start and secure the missing overpowered nightlight is one of the most surreal situations Tony has ever had the displeasure of experiencing.

Peter Parker

the worst field trip ever by shrill_fangirl_screaming (Teen, 3420) tumblr: @i-am-having-an-emotion

"We're on a field trip," Peter said. "To here. And Tony decided to be our tour guide and absolutely embarrass me, so can you please help get him under control?"

Which is how Peter Parker, architect of his own destruction, ended up with not one but two superhero pseudo-dads being annoying on his school field trip.

Steve Rogers

Do You Remember Being Happy? ('Cause I Sure Don't) by GalaxyThreads (Teen, 11022) tumblr: @galaxythreads

That seems about right. He doesn't know how he knows that, though. He does have vague memories of an annoyed fondness at finding peanut butter in some sort of jam. Thor's doing, because he doesn't see the point of using two knives when one works just as fine. He knows that. How does he know that? He knows all those little details, though, almost innately. How can he know these strangers so deeply?

Everyone else below the cut!

Loki

Proprietary by TheThirdMarauder (Teen, 7639)

No, Loki simply wants the Avengers conquered. The details of whom, how, and when matter not. Unless, of course, said details interfere with Loki's plans. Then, well, then none can fault him for protecting his own interests.

Loki has always been exceptionally good at lying to himself.

Natasha Romanov

What Girls Are Made Of by enigma731 (Teen, 4613) tumblr: @enigma731

She rolls her eyes but does as he’s indicated, using his shoulders to leverage herself up onto his back, her arms around his neck and her legs hugging his waist.

“You know,” he says blithely, “this isn’t really what I tend to picture when I think of a hot girl riding me.”

Natasha groans, deciding that if his sense of humor gets them arrested, she’ll kill him herself. “Just go.”

Clint Barton

Dear Clint Barton (circa age 7) by pollyrepeat (Teen, 4221)

With a normal person, this might count as blackmail material, but a) this is a case of mutually assured destruction if ever there was one, and b) Fury is immune to embarrassment. Not just in the regular, Tony Stark way, either, oh no. Things that could possibly end up being embarrassing to Fury get somehow warped and changed until they go from mortifying all the way over into useful and/or good for his image. It’s like a superpower.

Carrying Clint’s small child self around on his shoulders more than once has probably already hit the interagency rumour mill as an example of Fury’s innate awesomeness: good with rocket launchers and small children.

Also available as a podfic!

Bruce Banner

They're Not Wrong by Trumpeteer34 (Teen, 10163)

As Tony began to pace around the hole in the road to keep himself from shooting repulsors at the nearby buildings in a fit of rage, Thor began to study the nearby area. There was no sign of either the Hulk or Bruce Banner beyond the crater. The surrounding area, aside from the rubble of the fight, held no clue as to their friend’s location.

“Guys, he’s gone,” Tony growled into the communicator on their private line, drawing Thor out of his darkening thoughts. “Someone tranqed him and took him. He’s gone.”

Honorary mention goes to the Responsible Science series by @letteredlettered - the stories don’t have the "Avengers Team & Bruce Banner" tag, but they could, and they are amazing. The best Bruce Banner writing I've ever come across.

Thor

Fortunately, I Am Mighty by onward_came_the_meteors (General, 3062)

Steve was the first one to speak. “Are you okay?”

Thor nodded. Which was a bad idea, as it turned out, because now there were little gray lights flashing in front of his eyes. “I’m fine.” Absolutely everyone narrowed their eyes, and he added, “But, uh. Could we possibly not get back in the car just yet?”

Avengers Team

Civil Wasn't by onward_came_the_meteors (General, 7123)

"We're having an ideological conflict here," Tony stated with disbelief. "Are you telling me you still want to go out to dinner?"

"It's a standing engagement, Tony," Rhodey reminded him.

"Not you too—"

"We already had to reschedule from Friday when Natasha was..." Rhodey frowned. "What were you doing?"

The question was directed toward Natasha, who shrugged and said, "Spy stuff."

James "Bucky" Barnes

You Know How I Feel, aka, The Adventures of Bucky and Muffy the Dinosaur by ifeelbetter (Not Rated, 4511) tumblr: @ifeelbetterer

“As you may have heard, Bucky Barnes, a.k.a. The Winter Soldier, recently rescued a tiny part-robot dinosaur during the Avengers’ battle with Dr. Doom in Antarctica,” the other newscaster explained. “Pictures of Barnes and the dinosaur were posted on twitter by fellow Avenger, Clint Barton, a.k.a. Hawkeye, and immediately made Barnes’s new pet America’s sweetheart.”

“Her name’s Muffy,” said Steve."

Wanda Maximoff

and the woman was young again by Mira_Jade (General, 3669)

Tony Stark called them the Cap's Kooky Quintet, and sometimes the term amused her – causing her to lift a sardonic brow where someday a smile would truly smile. She enjoyed the presence of comrades – true comrades – and she enjoyed the way their minds wove and bound together about each other to fluctuate against her senses as one. There was something soothing about being in their midst, and even when their loud and brash ways – their painful Americaness - rubbed her raw and drained on her, it was ever the knitting of their minds that soothed those moments over, and made them inconsequential.

Phil Coulson

Coulson's First Day of School by storiesfortravellers (Teen, 3055)

Coulson looked up at him. “I like drawing pictures with Mr. Rogers. I like having tea parties with Ms. Potts. I like it when Dr. Banner reads me books, and I like it when Natasha teaches me things. And I like when you play with me. You do really good voices when we play action figures. And you’re the only one who lets me do stuff like jump off the high diving board at the pool or eat three cupcakes or play tackle with kids at the park.”

Clint didn’t realize that. He was pretty sure that meant that he was doing something wrong.

Darcy Lewis

Beginner Yoga for Dummies (Darcys) and Sad Hobos by chailover (Teen, 3434)

Darcy had a theory: crazy attracted crazy, working kind of like gravity. It was pretty much her explanation for her life after Thor. And if she had thought the type of crazy Thor attracted was bad, be it Loki or the Warrior Three and Sif, or the dark elves and the Convergence, it was still nothing against what the Avengers manage en masse.

Matt Murdock

Double Blind by smilebackwards (Teen, 2381) tumblr: @smilebackwards

Stark snaps his fingers. “You can’t see half of my inventions. This explains so much about you and why you’ve never been properly impressed by me.”

“Does it?” Matt says, ambiguously.

Sam Wilson

Bystander by scribblemetimbers (Teen, 52029)

“I just want you to know,” Sam says loudly, cautiously raising his hands, “That I’m very poor and very sleep-deprived and literally the only thing you can kill me for right now are my notes.” He pauses. Wait. On second thought: “Please don’t steal my notes.”

“I’m not—I’m not a mugger,” Not Mugger rasps out, and for all that he looks about to keel over and die, the man actually manages to sound offended.

Nick Fury

Bedtime Story by dixiehellcat (Teen, 2532) tumblr: @deehellcat

Fury snorted. “I have to check in with the duty officer. I’ll be back in, let’s say twenty minutes. I expect all of you to have whatever your pre-bedtime routines are completed, and be in here pajama’ed and ready to be read to.”

He tapped the book under his arm, then left with the usual dramatic swish of his long coat. Bruce scratched his head. “Did…he just say be ready to be read to?”

Pepper Potts

Pepper and the Avengers (Which She Knows Nothing About) by rebelmeg (General, 6696) tumblr: @rebelmeg

The Avengers, that mismatched group of hurt and heroism, was one of the most important things in Tony Stark’s life. So, naturally, Pepper had made them an important part of her life too.

Vision

039. Intoxicated by aimmyarrowshigh (Teen, 100) tumblr: @aimmyarrowshigh

It might be nice to fit in, just this once. To lose a bit of composure.

Vision floated over to the refrigerator and, with some timidity, pulled off a magnet. He stuck it to his forehead.

#marvel fic rec

6 notes · View notes

deniigi · 4 years

Text

Trope: Homeless Peter

Title: what is home if not a vehicle

Summary: Space-fish attack the Great State of New York, and in the mess, the Avengers lose the goddamn kid.

------------

His knees shook when he finally peeled back the helmet and it was a monumental task—the towering, marble kind—to lift one foot and then the other out of the footwell of the suit stand.

But Tony managed it.

You know, like a fuckin’ superhero.

He had this.

He maybe had a head injury and couldn’t see through all the blood dripping down his right eye—but you know what?

A fuckin’ superhero.

That’s me.

Ahahaha—

“TONY.”

Why hello, adoring fan. What a coincidence to meet you on the floor like this.

“What are you doing?”

Having a little lay down, my dear.

“GET UP.”

Wow, that’s a tone to take with a guy who volunteered to be the can in a state-wide Alien Kick-the-Can tournament. A little appreciation would be nice.

“Tony,” Pepper emphasized. “You need to get up.”

Why? Was there another alien? Tony was having a merry time here on the floor. Only more superheroing could move him, and even that was on thin ice given the whole knobbly-knee, shaky-hands situation.

“Peter’s gone.”

Tony’s head shot up.

“He’s not gone,” he said. “He’s with Falcon.”

Pepper’s eyes were very blue and ringed by white on every side.

“No,” she said. “He’s gone. Get. Up.”

Pepper’s hands came around and grabbed his face before he could get another good smash in for it on the desk in front of him.

May Parker was in tears. She had every right to be. Cap was consoling her, promising her that they would find Peter while she fanned her dripping mascara.

And Tony?

Tony was exhausted. And now he had that weird gut-gnawing, gurgling feeling in his stomach, which, combined with the head injury that he was turning slowly into an actual hole straight to his brain (if Pepper would let go, anyways), was paving the way for a future spent at the foot of the porcelain altar.

The kid. Had been. RIGHT. There.

Rhodey had confirmed this. He’d been RIGHT there. Tony had been keeping an eye on him and all that bouncy puppy energy. And when he could no longer do that (see: volunteering to be bait, also known as An Activity Not Appropriate for Minors to Witness), he’d handed him off to Sam.

He’d handed him off to Sam.

Sam was the second most level-headed person on the entire team. Rhodey was the first, and okay, he was mostly first because Tony was biased towards his best friend, but the point remained.

Sam had had the baby.

Sam said that he had had the baby, too. Until he couldn’t have the baby because A) the baby was very slippery and B) the baby apparently smelled like food to giant alien creatures with blue glowing tongues and drippy teeth, and so Sam had sent the baby far the fuck away from that action.

He’d told him to go give Bruce support in the north of the city.

Bruce had tears in his eyes when he said that he’d worked with Peter for a whole fifteen minutes before they’d gotten separated by a building collapsing nearly on top of them. The Hulk didn’t have time to babysit Spiders when that was happening. The Hulk just got angry and launched himself at the face of the fuckin’ space-kaiju that had caused it.

No one could fault him for this.

But that also meant that, two hours into a 48 hour melee, they’d lost the youngest team member.

May Parker was glued to her phone and the news, and Tony could hear the tinny voice of Peter’s voice message echoing out of her phone even from there, even through her hiccups and Steve’s soothing Captain America tones.

Steve said that Peter was a smart boy. He was a strong boy. He’d know that they were looking for him and he’d done way, way worse than two days of fighting before. He’d know when to find a safe place and stay put for long enough to regain his energy.

And more than that, he knew New York like the back of his hand. He’d come home, May.

He’d come home.

Tony was about to swear to this poor woman that he would personally deliver her child to her doorstep when the klaxons crashed through the building and sent Tony’s whole body into a state of temporary numbness with pain.

The room went red.

The room went red again

Everyone turned slowly towards the window and Tony barely saw Steve throwing up the shield and reaching for May Parker at the same time before he reacted.

Pepper went down under the desk.

The glass exploded.

And here we go again.

---

Just for the record—just for the fucking record—Tony wanted it known that he hated Albany.

It was flat.

Its skyline was boring as hell.

And Tony was 99.9% sure that there a mass illness among the people of this city.

Rhodey informed him that he was only thinking that because his interactions with humanity at street level came from New Yorkers and Los Angeles folks, neither of whom could find it in their souls to give a shit about what other people shouted at them.

Rhodey further explained patiently that the reaction of most people in the continental US to a known superhero telling them to get the fuck out of the way was not, in fact, being told ‘no YOU move, motherfucker.’

Tony didn’t get it.

Steve laughed so hard he sort of collapsed onto Sam’s shoulder and started making this sound that reminded Tony of a sob.

They all needed sleep. It had been four days.

But then, like a champion of all 8-year-olds, a little girl piped up from somewhere in the crowd that had gathered around their Avengers team huddle, “Hey! Where’s Spiderman?”

And all bodies went from sobbing to swearing.

The damn kid.

---

It had been a week. May Parker had filed Peter as missing. He still hadn’t come home and he wasn’t even close to getting home because Tony had just gotten a call from Wolver-fucking-ine himself asking if he knew Baby Webs.

“He downed a space-fish in Gloversville,” Wolverine said. “And Scott nearly swiped him up, but he ain’t moved fast enough, and Websy noticed him first. He went and hid in the sewer and kept hissing at us for hours. Tried to feed him, but he wants nothin’ to do with us.”

Peter.

Peter, no.

X-men are friends.

“Did you manage to grab him?” Tony asked, already resigned to the answer.

“He ran off.”

Fuck.

“Sorry about that.”

Fuck.

“He’s a bitty one, ain’t he?”

“He’s fifteen.”

“Jesus.”

“I know,” Tony said. “We’re trying to grab him. It’s been a week. His phone’s dead and his mom’s freaking out, and I swear, he’s never been that far out of a city.”

Wolverine made a contemplative sound.

“Alright, we’ll keep a better eye out,” he said. “He can’t have gone far. He ain’t swingin’ with that web shit.”

He must have run out of that, too.

Peter, honey. Just. Stand. Still.

Forget the space-fish. For like, two hours.

---

May asked Pepper to ask Tony what felt like ages later if the X-men had any more information on her kid. Pepper said that she sounded defeated.

Tony wished that he had more to give her besides a handful of blood from the torn skin on his hip and the words that Scott Summers had passed along just the day previous.

“The kid followed the last fish out,” Summers said. “I’m sorry, Stark. I tried to nab him, but that thing was taking down trees and we all got buried.”

---

Two weeks.

Two whole weeks the boy had been missing and only now were the space-fish starting to let up. Part of that had to do with the fact that Barton had figured out that if you went for the eyes, forsook any sense of self-preservation and decency, and climbed into the gaping hole you left there, you could smash the thing’s brain and take it down to earth like Cap nose-diving into the Atlantic.

Steve had passed through all the stages of grief into hysteria this last week.

No one could talk to him because he started laughing and then weeping in a span of 15 seconds.

Natasha and Sam were on it.

Barnes was out with Barton, laying waste to wading pool that was Rochester at the moment. And that finally gave Tony the time that he needed to go out and search for the kid.

Rhodey came with and they ended up in Horseheads of all places, asking people on the street if they’d seen a Spiderman approximately a half the size they expected him to be.

People in Horseheads said no, that was Buffalo that had had the Spiderchild flinging himself around in it.

So they headed for Buffalo, only to get a message halfway there from Barnes that he’d almost caught the little shit in Rochester. Barton was after him as they spoke.

On foot apparently.

“He looks like shit, Stark,” Barnes said, huffing while he ran. “Clint’s on his tail now though, but I think he thinks he’s in trouble, so he’s—WAIT NO. BARTON.”

And the line went off.

And Rhodey groaned for both of them.

----

Rochester contained a very wet, very frustrated Hawkeye and zero Bucky Barneses.

Hawkeye said that they’d nearly had Peter. But then.

He gestured furiously out to the harbor which was full of wreckage from the ensuing battle on shore.

Tony asked him if they had it handled or if they needed backup, to which Hawkeye said that only God knew shit at this point. He was just a human football, being punted back and forth across the state of New York in a way that his soul truly deserved.

Barton perhaps needed both a nap and a meal or two in him.

Peter probably needed days of both of those things.

“Yeah, no. I asked around and people have seen him bopping around the pigeons and gulls,” Barton said. “Some lady told us that she saw him coming out of a park bathroom. Another gal said she saw him tucked up on a roof and lured him down. She said she thought he was some homeless teenager and was worried ‘cause he was up there without a coat. She was surprised as hell when he was the real thing and asked her for a map. Said his phone was busted and he was trying to find the train station.”

Kiddo.

“He’s makin’ it, Stark,” Barton said. “Not sure how. But he’s makin’ it.”

That wasn’t comforting.

---

Chasing after Peter wasn’t working. He kept slipping through their fingers and getting startled by people chasing him.

He seemed a little paranoid. Although that was probably because folks had started to change tact and approach him out of their suits.

They’d skimmed right past the part where Peter didn’t really know most of them out of their suits. And then they’d skimmed right past the part where most of them, out of their suits, didn��t look anything like the pictures that the paps took of them.

JB’s hair was long as hell. Natasha wore little make up and didn’t both straightening her ginger mane. Sam’s fade was looking a little lopsided with the piece of glass that the docs had had to dig out of it, and so a hat was his primary mode of fashion at the moment. Steve’s out-of-suit fashion could be described as ‘Jock with Tats Wears Cardigan and Dock Martins. More at 11.’

They’d all gone too far into being people and Peter now thought that he was being pursued by undercover SHIELD agents.

And, like the genius child that he was, he’d realized that his reds were catching attention and, now that the space-fish were a less pressing issue, and now that he was up in colder climes, he’d swapped them for some street clothes. And now no one had seen Spiderman.

Including the other Avengers.

The fastest way to find him was through facial recognition software, but someone out there, infuriatingly, seemed to be teaching Peter how to live like this.

The features Tony put in everyone’s new chunky glasses only ever caught him just before he turned tail and started sprinting.

And goddamn, that kid was fast.

Tony himself had chased him through Nowheresville, Fuck This State, and even that seemed ineffective.

He didn’t understand.

Peter knew who he was. He knew his voice.

Right?

Why was he running? Why was he still running?

May thought that he must have gotten it into his head that everyone was furious with him. She said that Peter’s guilt complex was wide and deep and he often slunk home late and hid from her if he thought she was mad.

He wasn’t super great with confrontation outside of his red and blues.

But something was also going on with May. Tony wasn’t sure what it was until Barton came into his lab where Tony was bouncing between trying to find where Peter’s suit had last been and trying to pry the enormous scales off a space-fish head.

“Tony,” Barton said. “Mrs. Parker’s lost faith in us.”

Tony laid his head against the scaly mass in front of him and sighed.

“You know what? That’s fair,” he said.

If some of the world’s so-called finest couldn’t even catch a literal child after three weeks of trying, Tony would have said that they were a bunch of useless fucks, too.

“She came to me and asked me if I’d help her try something different,” Barton said. “So I’m gonna need you to trust me, man.”

Trust him?

Sure, why not?

At this point, nothing Tony or Rhodey or Natasha tried had worked. So why not Barton? He was the one who kept getting the closest to the kid.

He had his own little menace he was chasing around anyways. He knew this shit.

“Glad you think so,” Barton said. “But I need like, a written agreement that you ain’t gonna scream at me, okay?”

Written agreement. Pft. Okay.

---

“ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?”

Barton stared at Tony and pointed at Rhodey like a tattle-tell. Tony was exhausted.

“TONY.”

He was so tired, Rhodey.

“You cannot sanction this,” Rhodey said.

Tony wasn’t sanctioning anything. He was just letting the aunt take the reins.

“We are not sending the Punisher after a child,” Rhodey said.

“The jokes on you, bub,” Clint told him. “The Punisher is already keeping an eye out for the child and you know what? He’s got a bite.”

Silence flooded the meeting room. Sam Wilson turned around slowly in his chest and moved his icepack to the other hand.

“Say that again,” he said.

Barnes’s eyes went huge like a cat and Nat leaned her elbows onto his shoulders.

“I said,” Barton scoffed at them, “The Punisher’s still upstate. I sent him a text explaining shit. He’s got a soft spot for babies. You know, latent dad instincts and all that, and he’s been homeless for like, years now. So he said he’ll keep an eye out. He’s got an idea of a few places where kids around Peter’s age go when they’ve got nowhere else to.”

Tony stomped down on the urge to say that Peter wasn’t like those kids; he did have a place to go. He was just misunderstanding the situation. He was just fifteen and tired and not thinking logically. Translating people chasing him as anger instead of help.

Man, all those straight As really put that kid’s fear of abandonment into perspective now.

Tony didn’t even know how to approach him anymore.

He wasn’t a dad. No one on this team was a dad. They didn’t know how to talk to kids. Or if they did, not teenagers.

So you know what?

If the Punisher thought he could grab the kid, then he should.

----

And the Punisher did.

Tony had never spoken directly to the man. The whole team went silent when Barton answered the call and then said, “hold on, let me put you on speaker.”

The Punisher’s voice was husky and hoarse with his whisper.

“Got him,” he said softly.

Tony covered his eyes in relief.

“He’s sleepin’,” The Punisher said. “Real adaptable. You weren’t kiddin’, Barton.”

“Thank god,” Steve said.

“He hurt?” Barton asked.

“Yeah,” the Punisher said. “He ain’t let me look ‘im over, but he’s got scabs all over. Cute kid. Once we were on the same page, he came willingly enough.”

What did that mean?

“Means I had to find some vegetarian shit from McDonalds,” the Punisher said like Tony was an idiot. “Kid’s hungry. Cold. Needs a bath. Found him tucked up with some others. They ain’t wanna come like him. But they’re good kids with good folks; they told him that if he had someone waiting on him, he should go.”

They’d done what?

The Punisher snorted.

“Homeless folks aren’t stupid, moneybags,” he said. “They got problems, but they aren’t stupid. And they ain’t want my help, so that’s that. You give ‘em some money and let ‘em do what they need to.”

What.

“I know, it’s almost like their lives ain’t your business,” the Punisher huffed.

He was kind of a dick.

“You headed back this way?” Barton asked.

“That’s a negative,” the Punisher said.

Rhodey went stiff.

“But don’t worry, I got someone to leave him with when I get to where I’m goin’,” the Punisher said. “He’ll bring him down your way.”

Barton sighed.

“Thanks, Frank,” he said. “We owe you one.”

“I don’t want your debt,” the Punisher said. He said nothing.

“I owe you one,” Barton corrected.

“Damn right, you do, Sparky.”

“Collect when you’re ready,” Barton said.

“Copy that.”

Barton hung up and stared with crystal eyes into Tony soul.

“Someone tell the kid’s aunt,” he said.

---

The Punisher went up to Niagara Falls, whereupon he handed Peter off to Deadpool.

Tony almost had a stroke.

May Parker slapped a hand onto her chest and sighed in relief.

“Thank god,” she said.

Thank god?

More like, god have mercy, no?

“No, thank god,” May said.

May had Deadpool’s number in her goddamn phone. Tony was dumbfounded.

“Eyyyyyy,” Deadpool cheered when he answered May’s call. “Well, look who it is. Pete—heya babycakes, you—? Okay, no. Sorry, we had a big day at the falls. He’s tired.”

Deadpool cackled. May huffed out a chuckle and shook her head.

“Thank you, Wade,” she said tearfully. “Thank you so much.”

“Don’t sweat it,” Deadpool said cheerfully. “Little Scrappy’s just scrappier. He ain’t hurt bad. Just a little shaken. Got that good anxiety. Six kinds of paranoia, look at ‘im go. That’s healthy, that’s what that is.”

It was not, Mr. Pool.

“Who’s makin’ that racket in the background?” Deadpool asked.

May explained that she was in the company of the Avengers. She did not say that half of them were shocked stupid. She did not say that Rhodey was clawing his hands at the sky and lamenting a career in military service being useless compared to fuckin’ Deadpool’s sunny disposition.

“Ah,” Deadpool said. “Well, I’m just gonna not say shit to him about that.”

“That’s fine,” May said. “Tell him I love him and I’m not mad. I’ve just been worried. Where’s his phone?”

“Oh, honey. You should see it. Kid fished it out of the sea,” Deadpool said. “I found a fuckin’ barnacle in it. Pretty impressive how small them things get, you know what I mean?”

Somehow, May did. Even though Tony emphatically did not.

“How long?” she asked.

“Ehn. Well. I got a job . Then I’m meeting someone in Syracuse. But you know what’s good news?”

“What?” May asked.

“Red’s at a conference in Ithaca,” Deadpool said. “He said he can swipe Spiderkid up from the bus station.”

Red?

Who was Red?

“You serious right now, DP?” Barnes asked.

“Ohhhh, why hello there, Winter. Didn’t see you there,” Deadpool said. “I am indeed serious. I’ll put the kid on a bus to Cornell or where the fuck ever and our Hornheaded friend will grab him before he scurries off to the wind again. He’ll be fine. Car rides are lullabies to him.”

May seemed touched.

“I’ll wire you the money, Wade,” she said.

“Huh? Oh, no. Don’t worry about it. I’m puttin’ it in the favor box,” Deadpool said. “Barnesy, my boy. Red hates everything upstate and his boo-bear’s got family they’re gonna visit in Poughkeepsie. Can one of you darling blockheads meet him up there to take the kid, so he doesn’t ruin his one and only chance at marriage?”

What.

The fuck.

Was happening?

“Uuuuh, when? Tomorrow?” Barton asked.

“Two days from now,” Deadpool said. “If you can’t, don’t sweat it. I got a gal who’s willing to pick him up.”

“I can go as far as Paterson,” Barnes said out of nowhere. “If your gal can bring him down that far, that’d be good. I’ll bring the bike.”

“Oh, that’ll be fun,” Deadpool said. “Totally doable. I’ll give her a call and send you an address. Thanks a million, Winter.”

Barnes sniffed.

“It’s cool. Show him a picture of me so he ain’t bolt again,” he said.

“Copy that,” DP said. “I’ll let him know what you said, May. Bye for now.”

He hung up.

May Parker deflated into a puddle of relief.

Tony still didn’t know what was happening.

“Wilson’s gonna hand the kid off to Daredevil,” Barton explained. “And DD will take him with him to Poughkeepsie, where Wilson’s contact—the fuck is her name, Barnes?”

“Domino,” Barnes said.

“That’s the one,” Barton said. “She’ll pick him up, probably with Summers, and bring him down to Paterson and then Barnes’ll go grab him from there and bring him home.”

That—

Wh—

Why couldn’t they, the Avengers, have orchestrated this? This was not hard. This was advanced Connect Four.

“Sometimes, you can’t think like a hero,” Barton told him. “You gotta think like a vigilante.”

---

Peter came home. Barnes swept him up from the station in Paterson and tossed him over a shoulder. And Tony came into the medical bay as soon as he got word of their arrival to find him sprawled out there still, asking Barnes a thousand questions about fuckin’ heroin.

God, lord, Jesus.

Someone spare Tony’s soul.

Peter noticed him and reacted by slipping off Barnes’s shoulder and hiding behind him as though he expected Tony to start shouting at any moment.

And for a moment, Tony almost felt like he should have.

But he wasn’t Peter’s dad. And Peter hadn’t done that shit on purpose. He’d just been scared and when he got scared, he’d decided to turn towards people he knew he could trust.

The other street level guys. People like him.

Tony couldn’t be angry with him for that.

So he came over and collapsed into the chair next to Peter’s assigned bed and held out his arms.

“Hugs for an old man?” he asked.

Peter peeked out from behind Barnes and lit up.

His hug was crushing. His clothes were rank and his wrists looked skinny and he was as pale as Tony had ever seen him, but he was here.

And he was chillin’.

“Next time, just stay in the city, alright?” Tony said. “We got the state. You got the city. At least until you’re old enough to have your own credit card, yeah?”

“Kay,” Peter hummed.

“You scared the shit out of us, kiddo.”

Peter pulled away from him and hopped back up on the bed.

“Is my aunt coming?” he asked.

Tony sighed.

She was.

“Cool, I missed her. My phone broke and maps are hard. I got like four of them. Folks kept givin’ theirs to me, even though I needed like, money.”

Tony leaned forward and held his face in his hands.

“Yeah?” he finally managed to say.

“Yeah,” Peter hummed. “It’s really hard to get a bus with no money. And they don’t even have buses in a lot of places, you know? Like, Uber isn’t even a thing out there. You’ve just gotta have a car or know someone who does.”

Bless.

“Wade says that I’m a city boy.”

That’s ‘cause you are, child.

“But I slept in a tree, so that’s camping.”

It’s not.

“And there was a raccoon. So that’s camping.”

It’s really, really not.

“I saw Cyclops and he tried to laser-eyes me, but, get this, I Lizard-ed him. Went into the sewers like Connors. I mean, he’s a jerk, but he’s definitely right to stick to the sewers. It’s warm down there. Can you imagine if the X-men X-manned me, though? Wade says that they do that to people.”

Tony was melting.

“They definitely do that to people,” Barnes said.

Vigilantes, man. The lies they spread.

“I made some friends in Buffalo,” Peter carried on. “They’re nice. They used to live in Rochester. They saw me fighting a space-fish, and they said that was cool as hell. And so they were tellin’ me about garbage plates and then Chelsea’s mom told me I needed to go home because May probably wasn’t mad and it was getting too cold. And then she made me promise not to do drugs. And when Mr. Castle showed up, she waved him down—I like her a lot. I gave them my money so that they could sleep in the shelter and I think Mr. Castle gave her more money, but he gave me and Chelsea McDonalds. And it was like, so good, Mr. Stark. I forgot how much I like McDonalds.”

Fuckin’ garbage plates.

“I’m gonna make one,” Peter hummed.

Someone come take these kid home already.

----------------------------------

Problems I have with the Trope:

So I don’t know the homeless Peter trope very well, but I don’t love it because in order to write it, you have to remove May from the picture, pretty much entirely. Folks either tend to kill her or make her abusive and that’s fucked up to do to, not only Peter’s remaining family member, but to a civilian female character.

I also don’t love this trope because I don’t love Irondad and the homeless Peter trope is pretty much designed for him to be saved by Tony.

The third reason I don’t enjoy this trope is because I don’t think enough people do their research on, not only what it takes to become homeless (especially for a minor), but how broad definitions of homelessness are. People who are homeless don’t just live on the street; they live in cars, they couch surf, they work hard to be clean, they have jobs.

And the last reason (for now), that I find this trope difficult is Peter’s age. Age is the hardest shit. A homeless 14-15 yo is kind of difficult to work with because there are layers of safety nets and, if you don’t kill May or make her abusive, it is next to impossible to work through her responsible nature and stability to put her and Pete out on the street plausibly (and I refused to compromise on this, which is how I ended up with this accidental loss). It would be much easier to write a homeless Peter as a college student.

#fic #ficlet #trope subversion #Peter Parker #I'm still taking trope suggestions if you'd like to see one subverted/flipped

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stylesluxx · 4 years

Text

cold? chilling? freezing? (I) – s.rogers

[warnings: brief talk of violence]

summary: in which y/n is an assassin turned lover | part two

word count: 1,193

masterlist

"Agent Y/L/N, welcome to S.H.I.E.L.D."

The man that spoke to you wore a black eyepatch and was dressed in all black. He was a spy that didn't bother hiding he was a spy.

"Thank you for having me, Director," You nodded and shook the hand he held out.

You looked around the Helicarrier as he gave you a tour. You were impressed. You've never been a part of an organization that was so advanced.

"The other Avengers are in the lab. They might already be bumping heads, but try to ignore it. They should be happy they have another teammate," He attempted to warn you.

You just nodded and kept a straight face as you both walked into an area where the other recruits were mid-conversation.

"Meet Agent Y/N Y/L/N. She's a trained assassin and will prove to be a great asset to the team," Fury introduced you to the four people standing in front of you.

Robert Bruce Banner, also known as Bruce Banner or Hulk. He's a good-mannered (despite the big green guy) rational, analytical, shy genius. A guy you would've fallen in love with had you not been taught to be a cold and standoffish assassin.

Thor Odinson, initially a stubborn, irrational, and arrogant brute that was turned mature and level-headed.

Natasha Romanoff, also known as Natalia Alianovna Romanoff or Black Widow. She's charismatic and can easily adapt to any role she has to play. Typical assassin.

Finally, Steven Grant Rogers, described in the files as compassionate, patriotic, courageous, and sticks with his morals until the very end. It was respectable, not necessarily how you were "raised" though.

"Nice to meet you all. I've read the mission files and have already been caught up by Fury, so no need for introductions. What's Loki's play?" You spoke sharply and looked at Loki's brother, Thor, for an answer.

Fury gave the other four an amused look before walking off, letting the group work on their own.

Thor then started explaining what Loki wanted and who he was working with.

"He's got two people brainwashed, correct? And one of them is Agent Barton?" You clarified.

"Loki has them under some kind of spell," Natasha nodded.

"I want to know why Loki let us take him. He's not leading an army from here," Steve spoke up.

"He didn't let you take him easy because there's someone on this ship that he's going to use as a pawn. Not too hard to figure out," You said and sat in the chair furthest from the table but closest to Agent Maria Hill.

You ignored them as they went back to talking about Loki. Of course, they were going to brush that off, they didn't want to admit that someone here was easy to use as a piece in Loki's game.

Tony Stark walked in the room, captivating it with his genius, as he does.

Anthony Edward Stark, Iron Man, a self-proclaimed egotistical playboy, philanthropist, billionaire, and genius. You would agree but you knew that was a façade. You had one too. Everyone with the potential to be an emotional wreck but has something to prove has a façade.

"Am I the only one who did the reading? And speaking of which, there wasn't much of you in them. Who are you?" He asked you, catching your attention.

"Y/N Y/L/N. Former assassin," You responded shortly.

"Yeah, I got that but anything else?" He asked and continued to push. "You guys usually have names. For example, Natasha here is Black Widow. Clint is Hawkeye. What do they call you?"

"Seven."

"No special name? Just a number and they couldn't even call you 'One?' How helpful could you possibly be?" He questioned.

You quickly reached over and grabbed Hill's gun from her holster and shot six bullets, purposely missing each of their heads by a centimeter. You put it back and sat back in your seat, crossing your legs.

"And I know five different ways to gouge your eye out with a shoelace. Any more questions, comments, and/or concerns?"

They all looked at you in shock except Tony. He knew he succeeded at pushing your buttons just a little.

"Then shall we continue?" You asked when no one spoke up.

Once Tony and Bruce decided to go to the lab, you followed behind but went to where you'd be staying at instead.

It was a small and temporary room, nothing special or specialized for you. But that was okay, you didn't like staying anywhere for too long. Being comfortable allows vulnerability and the potential to be shocked or disappointed. And those two feelings might provoke you to act out irrational and you desired to be level-headed at all times.

You sat alone in the room for a while doing nothing (because you obviously weren't unpacking) until you heard a knock. You sat up from the twin-sized bed and went to unlock and open the door.

—

Third Person POV

Steve watched as Y/N quickly exited the meeting behind Banner and Stark. His other teammates were in the files so he felt like he had a pretty good understanding of them but Y/N had almost nothing in hers.

All he knew was her name, age (27), the seven different languages she could speak (English, Latin, Spanish, French, Arabic, Portuguese, and Afrikaans) and where she was from (but he only knew that because of the unmistakable French accent).

When Steve realized he couldn't pry out as much information as he would've liked about the mysterious woman, he left Fury behind and walked to the lab.

When he saw Tony sticking Bruce, he of course had to comment about protecting the lives of those on the ship. When he realized it'd be harder than he thought getting through to Tony, he changed the subject.

"Mister Stark, is there any way you know any more information about Agent Y/L/N that you might know?" Steve asked, hoping maybe Tony did some extra research on the girl.

"Why? Got a crush?" Tony teased, causing Steve to cross his arms and roll his eyes. "Well, I did try but she's pretty good at cleaning up after herself and staying low key. Which I kind of figured, she's very... what's the word?" He hummed and snapped his fingers.

"Cold? Chilling? Freezing? Arctic, if you will," Bruce huffed out, raising an eyebrow.

"I think she just needs one on one time," Steve suggested even though he agreed with the men about her standoffish demeanor.

"Well you do it then, Doctor Rogers," Tony playfully taunted and set his hands on the table next to Loki's scepter.

"We're scared of her... like... petrified," Bruce admitted before going back to his computer.

"I wouldn't say I'm scared of her, she just seems a little unpredictable," Tony corrected him.

"Seems like you two might get along then," Steve directed toward Tony before walking out the lab.

Steve knew what it felt like to be a fish out of water, he still was on the shore flopping around and choking on air if you thought about it.

Steve was a big empathizer and that's how he found himself knocking on your bedroom door.

[AN: so this is my first series and there’s eight parts total. I’m kinda nervous ngl but excited]

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theabominableblogger · 3 years

Text

My Reaction to “Avengers Endgame”

Yes- I still haven’t seen this movie. Yes I know exactly what happens in this movie. I mainly avoided it for a while due to overhype but with some convincing from my brother, Imma sit my butt down and try to watch this.

Pressing... play!

Right off the bat, I feel like I should warn you guys and say that I have... my opinions... about stuff. Plus I’m a dumbass about Marvel so just bear with me.

I like that Disney Plus has to warn us about product placement

Clint!

Are we gonna see little Nathaniel running around- THERE he is!

We are gonna see Clint’s entire family get freaking obliterated

Is all the rumbling from the sky or are those airplanes freaking crashing to Earth in the distance?

What if they pulled a reverse WandaVision and showed the people getting snapped out of existence in a future film or show? That would be freaking terrifying.

They’re [Tony and Nebula] playing paper football...

I wanna see more of THEIR interactions aboard the Milano. The shots of them just repairing the ship are great too.

“I’m fine. Totally fine.” Everyone ever.

I also like you see the visual difference between Tony and Nebula. While he’s growing gaunt and haggard from loss of oxygen, you can still see that Nebula looks absolutely fine because she’s like 75% android

So between 1995 and now, what the heck has Carol been up to?

“Thanos wiped out... 50% of all living creatures.” So like entire ecosystems are just demolished.

*anthropology major part of my brain scrambling for answers*

“We lost. And you [Steve] weren’t there.” HE WAS IN WAKANDA!

Wait so the arc reactor ISN’T in Tony’s chest anymore?

“Where the hell have you [Carol] been all this time?” Good question!

*silently bops to opening theme*

For some reason, I just really want the ship radio to randomly turn on so you just see everyone sitting awkwardly as “Piano Man” plays over the speakers

*Thanos slowly cooks his food* Faster, all together now! COOKING CAN BE FUN!

“I [Thanos] used the stones to destroy the stones.” ...what?

“I am...[Thanos] inevitable.” *starts humming “Inevitable” from TGWDLM*

“I [Thor] went for the head.” YES YOU DID

[FIVE YEARS LATER] All righty so we’re doing this

*gasps* Is... Steve running the therapy sit downs like Sam did in “The Winter Soldier”? That’s awesome. I really like this tidbit.

I’m also really liking Alan Silvestri’s score for this so far

I’m really trying not to nitpick but I feel like it would take more than 5 years for greenery to just completely overtake a suburban neighborhood

Also wow pre COVID life looks great you guys

“There’s a part of me that doesn’t even wanna find him.” Are they talking about... Clint? Is Clint just going the full vigilante route?

DOES HE KILL PEOPLE?!?

I really like Steve and Natasha’s friendship in these movies but for some reason I don’t feel like we get enough of Natasha for me to get behind her on an emotional standpoint

Are they gonna use the quantum realm to jumpstart the multiverse for Phase 4?

Also speaking of multiverse, I honestly really don’t want Spiderman: No Way Home or Wandavision to get too cluttered by that

I like Tony’s lake house. And he got a whole vegetable garden going too. Kudos!

The little kid who plays Morgan Stark is adorable

“Not if we strictly follow the rules of time travel.” Which we obviously won’t.

“We’re gonna need a really big brain.” So where the [expletive] is Banner?

“Stranger danger.” *snorts*

“Dab!” *rolls eyes*

So is the whole Professor Hulk thing permanent? I know he’s gonna be in the She-Hulk show but I’m wondering how they’re gonna tackle that. And they’re gonna have Tim Roth too!

*smiles when Tony takes Morgan to bed*

Steve Rogers here [when they do the first time travel tests] is a Look ™

Maybe don’t let the GIANT GREEN MAN keep pressing a bunch of tiny tiny important buttons on a dashboard

*laughs at Steve shaking his head in disbelief when they finally bring Scott back*

*Tony’s car races toward the Avengers base* NYOOOMMMM

*Tony rolls down his window* It’s Britney, bitch

“And maybe not die trying.” And you definitely will.

This whole bit where Scott keeps losing his dorito only to get another one from Bruce feels like a Doritos commercial.

*jams out to "Supersonic Rocket Ship by The Kinks*

Did they just keep reducing the green pigment for Hulk or what?

*sighs when they reveal Fat!Thor*

MIEK’S ALIVE!

Please tell me Noobmaster69 is Kid Loki, whom we meet in the Loki series

“Don’t... say that name.” “Yeah we actually don’t say that name here.” I like this. I like that Thor has so much resentment for killing Thanos at the wrong time and that he felt that could have done better cause he’s A GOD. So the fact that THANOS was on equal level and BEAT HIM-

Hawkeye’s killing people

This sword fight’s great [between the Yakuza person and Clint]

WHY DIDN’T THEY BUILD ON THIS [Clint and Natasha’s connection] ???

*laughs when Rhodey suggests killing baby Thanos*

These shots of Clint going through the Quantum Realm looks like something straight out of Andy Park’s concept art and that’s awesome

“Well I [Scott] haven’t [encountered an Infinity Stone] but I don’t even know what the hell you’re all talking about.” *snorts*

“The Aether, firstly, is not a stone.” Thank you!

The little glance Nebula gives after Thor mentions the Dark Elves just make me think that somewhere down the road, she has either A) encountered them or B) has encountered other Asgardians besides Thor

“Guys if you pick the right year, there are three stones in New York.” “Shut the front door.” *laughs*

Also underrated trio: Steve, Natasha, and Bruce. Gimme more.

Wait a minute, in 2012, Doctor Strange wasn’t active yet. So are they gonna go see- OOOOOOOHHHHHH

[NEW YORK 2012] Oh here we go

*cracks up when Bruce very half-assedly smashes stuff on the street*

“I’m looking for Doctor Strange.” “You’re about five years too early.” Wait a minute.

HOW DOES SHE [the Ancient One] KNOW?!?

*giggles at Thor and Rocket sneaking in the background with a bored Loki in focus*

“That’s my [Thor’s] mother. She dies today.” I love this scene already.

Also WHY IS THOR- or the Thor films in general- have like the most well written characters in the whole canon?

It’s those movies, Guardians 2, The Winter Soldier, Civil War, aaand.... I can’t think of any more of them.

Oh yeah and WANDAVISION cause THAT HIT ME LIKE A TRUCK-

Rocket just said he thinks of the Guardians as his family I’m gonna die...

What about their [Natasha and Rhodey’s] friendship?!? I want more of that!

“Ronan’s obsession... clouds his judgment.” ...HUH

*Thanos uses his sword to lift up Nebula’s chin* Aw heck no

“As far as I’m concerned, that’s America’s ass.” *has to take a second before nodding in agreement*

Wait is that Jasper Stillwell?

“Flick me.” That bit alone could be taken out of context

“We’re in route to Doctor List.” Who’s Doctor List? Is that a code name?

“Hail Hydra.” THE BASTARDS WENT AND DID IT

Please tell me this hand off scene is gonna be the opening for the Loki show. Please tell me this is gonna happen.

*Loki takes the Tesseract again* AND HE’S GOOONNNEE!!

LET’S GET TO FREAKING JUNE ALREADY!

*ends up quoting “Yeah, I know, I know” along with Steve*

I’m really glad Tilda Swinton actually came back for this cameo

*keeps slapping my laptop screen when people keep saying Doctor Strange made a mistake when it was an explicit point in Infinity War where he encountered 14 million other AUs to find the best result*

Are you telling me that this whole plan could derail because Nebula accidentally hacked into her own WiFI network? Are you seriously doing this?

*Thanos and Ebony Maw scan Nebula’s duplicate memory bank and track her down* Are you freaking kidding me?

...I have 96 minutes left?!?

“The future hasn’t been kind to you [Thor], has it?” Frigga is underrated

So for these shots with Jane, are they just reusing different shots from Thor 2 or just footage from deleted scenes?

Can we talk about how Frigga is absolutely the best parent Thor has? Meanwhile her husband ODIN is like “oh yeah by the way you have a secret sister totes magotes i’ll die now byeeee”

*sings along with “Come and Get Your Love” by Redbone*

*laughs when we cut to Quill just very badly singing along to his iPod in the distance*

I want a bonus short with just Rhodey and Nebula doing their thing

*Nebula gets her memory taken over by 2014 Thanos* Nooooooo...

Are the glasses that Tony wears here part of EDITH from “Far From Home” or are they like a prototype?

Also I haven’t seen “Far From Home” yet because Sony hates me

Doctor Zola?!?

*jams out to the music playing when we see Hank Pym’s lab*

“A little girl would be nice. Less of a chance that she’ll end up exactly like me [Howard Stark].” *gasps softly*

Oh my God, he’s [Steve] in Peggy’s office

Alan Silvestri is really killing it with this score

JARVIS!!

Wait and that’s the guy from “Agent Carter”!

Ohhh that shot’s [of Thanos’s ship coming out of the clouds] awesome...

*2014 Nebula hands Thanos the Pym particles* Oh are you kidding me...

The CGI for Red Skull is also awesome

*gasps when Natasha reveals that she never knew her dad’s name when Red Skull told it to her*

*is super bummed out when Natasha sacrifices herself*

Kevin Feige really went and said “so Phases 3 and 4 are gonna make everybody cry” and the writers went “YES”

Wait doesn’t Cap go and return the stones at the end of the movie? How’s he gonna handle meeting Red Skull on Vormir then?

“It’s like... I [Bruce] was made for this.” Please someone get Mark Ruffalo his own Hulk movie before he combusts from giving out more spoilers

So Thanos used the Pym particles to time travel then. Honestly that’s kinda genius

I just noticed that Scott shrank himself right as the explosion hit the windows

I really want someone to just drop one F-bomb somewhere in the MCU and I really hope it’s Clint because he would 100% say it

*starts singing “Hollaback Girl” when Thanos arrives*

Here’s my question; how did Thanos acquire Nebula then? With Gamora, it was with the genocide of her people.

“We [Gamora to Nebula] can stop him.” LET’S GO!

[Thor uses his storm powers to summon both Stormbreaker and Mjolnir] *softly* Ohhhhh that’s badass...

Now I’m just imagining the cast just in the green screen room just hitting Josh Brolin with a bunch of foam weapons and making all the sound effects while poor Josh is just struggling under the weight of the Thanos reference head on his mocap suit

Who does the voice for FRIDAY?

AN: Irish actress named Kerry Condon

*Steve deems himself worth to wield Mjolnir* OKKAAYY OKAAYY

Love how Thanos is like “yes, I’m gonna stab you with an AXE”

“In all my years of conquest...” Steve you suuuucckkk...

Are we getting the Chitauri again?

“On your left.” *laughs incredulously* O-ohhh my God...

*Everyone starts coming out of the portals* Oh my God I’m getting chills

I would have lost my mind in the theater

I HAVE ACTUAL GOOSEBUMPS RUNNING ALL OVER ME. This is how good this is

WAIT ARE THOSE THE RAVAGER SHIPS ABOVE THEM?!?

“Avengers... assemble.” Oh my God this is amazing!

M’BAKU!

Also “Endgame” really just said “We are KILLING FOOLS TODAY”

How are they gonna tackle Peter and Gamora’s relationship in Guardians 3?

[Horn plays La Cucaracha] LET’S GO

God I’m gonna turn feral

*has to pause to scream in excitement when Wanda touches down in front of Thanos to fight him*

*puts hands on head* OHH MY GOOOOODDDDD

They’re literally just playing Keep Away with a teenage boy. Marvel, everybody.

*Captain Marvel destroys Thanos’s ship* WELL IT TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH

OK I got mixed feelings about that [the girl power team up scene]

*Thanos unsuccessfully headbutts Carol* Oh shit!

*Doctor Strange holds up one finger* Oh my God this is it

Someone definitely tore off when Thanos pushed Tony off

It was in that moment he [Thanos] knew- he effed up

*All of Thanos’s army dissipates* Byeee...

Is it bad that I’m not crying at Tony’s death?

*gasps when Peter reunites with Ned at school*

Wait the whole time heist takes place within ONE DAY?

“I love you 3000.” I really hope we see Morgan again somewhere in one of the movies or shows. Actually a cool way to reincorporate her would be in the Ironheart series whenever they make it

Even Drax is wearing black!

It’s the “We should be getting therapy but we got a TV show instead” trio [Wanda, Bucky, and Sam]

Wait is that guy- was that guy- the little kid from Iron Man 3?

AN: Yes

So right after this funeral, Wanda’s gonna storm SWORD right?

AN: This was finished up on 2/26 so probably YES

*Thor crowns Valkyrie the new leader of New Asgard* I now cannot wait for “Thor Love and Thunder”

Wait Peter’s looking for Gamora!

Still cannot believe that the time travel suits are completely CGI

I know they had a body double for Chris Evans here but I do think it would have been cool if they used the body double’s voice for Old Steve instead of Chris trying to sound old

He [Steve] put the shield in an art portfolio bag...

*says “No, no I don’t think I will” along with Steve*

*silently jams out to “It’s Been a Long, Long Time” playing during the credits*

Wait and that was the song Fury was playing in “Winter Soldier”

Oh they even got the actual signatures! That’s awesome!

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lunanightingaleart · 3 years

Text

Quite The Unexpected Outcome

Synopsis: As arguments arise the fate of Loki sits in the hands of the Avengers, and Agent Abigail Lynn. While discussions are made the air is tense, and a final decision must be made today. Can Abigail convince the others of her plan?

Chapter 3: A Tense Decision

Start at Chapter 1

“And just where were you last night young lady?” Abigail snapped up from her momentary nap, her heart pounding out of her chest as she looked for the source of the voice. Relief hit her like a ton of bricks when she realized it was just Natasha joking with her.

“Whoa, easy there~ I was just kidding, you okay?” Abigail could feel her heart in her throat as she collected herself, nodding silently.

“Yeah, yeah sorry I was...having a nightmare.” She rubbed her temples as she attempted to calm her heart.

“What time is it?”

“Sometime around noon, we left you for a while but the meeting is starting so we thought we should wake you.” Abigail nodded and pulled herself up, looking around to see the other Avengers just casually standing outside of the break room.

“...I’m not carrying anything contagious.”

“No, but you could be a sleep puncher.”

“That’s fair, never suspect someone isn’t a sleep puncher.” Abigail smiled towards Tony before following them all towards the conference room.

“You mentioned you were having a nightmare?” She glanced up to Thor.

“Yeah, but it’s fine. There’s nothing I can really do about it anyway.”

“Well, what if there was a way to stop them?” A curious glance was sent towards him.

“I would honestly doubt it, but if you have a method I haven’t already heard of, I’m all ears.” Thor seemed to brighten up at the idea of showing off whatever this method was. Following him inside she listened as he explained himself.

“This is a spell of some sort from my mother. Whenever I or my brother had nightmares when we were young, she would gently set two fingers on our forehead, like this.” She watched him mirror the actions he instructed.

“And chant this little saying to us. Embrace your dreams through the night, Tomorrow comes with a whole new light.” She flinched for a moment when she felt a sudden zap at her forehead, like static shock hitting her skin. Pulling away she subconsciously rubbed her head, only to realize her head seemed...relaxed. As if the tense scenario had become less tense.

“Huh...that’s actually kind of cool.” She smiled, the others finding their seats and watching the scene.

“Alright kids, it’s adult conversation time. We can talk about nursery rhymes later.” Tony sat at the front of the table, opening up his computer and swiping through files.

“Alright so, the fate of Loki.” Abigail nervously began to fiddle with her thumbs underneath the table, listening to the group’s discussions of whether or not Loki should be sent back to Asgard, or kept here on earth.

“We managed to fiddle with the cuffs enough to make them much smaller in design, but also still do what they were meant to do. Along with some other fun features.”

“Well, sounds like someone had fun.” Natasha teased towards the two.

“I still don’t know how we managed but we were able to keep the integrity of the tech while separating the cuffs into practically security bracelets. If we do choose to keep Loki here, these cuffs will stay on him no matter what form he chooses to take.” Tony seemed to remind himself of something while Bruce continued to speak. Pulling out his phone he tapped the screen, and all the avengers gained a notification. Abigail noticed her own phone buzz and glanced at Tony.

“I don’t remember handing out my number.”

‘You didn’t have to, it doesn’t take much to find out.” She narrowed her eyes towards him as he playfully winked and went back to his presentation with Bruce.

“These babies are attached to all of our phones, the moment that Loki attempts to break the cuffs, leave the building, use his magic, or so much as attempt to use the internet without our permission, a notification goes to our phones. It keeps an eye on his pulse, his location at all times, and my favorite part for sure.” He holds up the cuffs towards Thor, who curiously takes them.

“Go ahead, try to crush them.” Thor did as instructed and began to squeeze them between his hands, a sudden jolt of electricity shot out and startled the God of Thunder.

“High voltage electric shock, stronger than any government made tasers, electric fences, even an actual lightning strike has some competition there. First it’ll give a warning, much like a dog’s shock collar. If he doesn’t listen well...we’ll be finding an unconscious god laying on the floor.” Tony and Bruce seemed pretty proud of themselves, setting the cuffs down on the table.

“While this is really cool and all guys, what happens if no one is near him? He could get shocked, get back up, and then go escape anyway. This doesn’t stop him completely if no one is home.”

“Well that’s why you would need someone to be there 24/7.” Abigail chimed in, crossing her arms.

“Like a caretaker?”

“Sort of like how we have guards now taking shifts watching him, I’d say an Avenger should take a shift to stay home.

“And if no one can stay home?”

“Well….an Agent should possibly become a regular watcher. Then when everyone leaves there’s still someone there.”

“And where do you think we would be holding him, Miss Abigail?” Hawkeye finally spoke up. Abigail leaned back and thought for a moment, looking around to everyone in the room.

“...Stark HQ.” Tony who had taken a moment to drink, spit it out immediately.

“Excuse me???”

“If Loki were to be kept in SHIELD, everyone would know where he is. No one in their right mind would believe that Fury would send a God that caused mass hysteria a few days ago to, no offense, a loose cannon drunkard that feeds his ego more than he strokes it.” She looked to Tony and nodded her head.

“Again no offence. If the World Organization was after the tesseract for its power, imagine why they’d want Loki. I would say safest option...Thor.” She looked towards him.

“Bring the tesseract back to Asgard, Earth shouldn’t have that power anyway. We keep Loki here, you come back and keep an eye on him. You get to spend time with that girl you like, it's a win win.”

“And pray tell what do you expect me to tell my father about Loki?”

“Tell him he’s currently been locked up, gaining punishment from...what do you call us? Midguardians? Well he’s gaining punishment from us and you’re going to stay on earth as a way to make sure he behaves himself. If he causes too much trouble and breaks out of his house arrest, then you can take him back to Asgard.”

“How long do you expect to keep a god??”

“Long enough to figure out everything.” The others began to stare towards Abigail.

“What is there to figure out?”

“A lot actually. The actual leader who sent Loki, whatever the hell that weird staff is. Does it only affect those who are touched by the staff or is it whoever wields it? Thor you mentioned prior that your brother was missing for an entire earth year before he appeared on earth from the tesseract. Where did he go for an entire year, somebody else must be a part of all this. The action of just, Thor taking Loki back to Asgard and none of us gaining any possible information on the creatures that sent him and that army...it just seems ridiculous. I can’t wrap my mind around it, and there’s a small possibility that he just doesn’t want to tell us.”

“That doesn’t mean he will tell us eventually.”

“Yes and no, I have a feeling he’s not going to speak to us if we interrogate him. The man only ever said a word to Natasha when he thought he had the upper hand, when Fury threatened him he said Nothing. I don’t think we’ll get anything from just keeping him in a cage. I think for once we have to take the softer option.” The room fell silent once more, eyes glancing in every direction and then back towards Abigail, who kept her gaze towards the table.

“....This doesn’t have to do with last night does it?”

“What?” Tony pointed at his screen that showed a paused shot of her and Loki taking and laughing. Everyone stared at it in surprise.

“Seems to me the agent has gotten pretty buddy buddy with the criminal.”

“I was having a conversation, is there something wrong with that?”

“There is when the other side of the conversation killed 80 in two days, took over Barton’s mind, caused the Hulk to come out and attack Romanoff, almost had an entire airship fall with all of us inside, and not only all of that, but threw me out of my own window expecting me to die! And you want me to keep this lunatic in My headquarters and be buddy buddy with him!?” Thor slams his hands on the table, startling Abigail at the sudden loud noise directly next to her.

“My brother is not a lunatic! Problematic yes, mischievous without a doubt, but a lunatic he is not.” The two began to argue on each side of Abigail, and the yelling slowly began to eat at her psyche. Without much control she placed both of her hands on each side of her head, fingers curling into her hair and gripping it tightly as a way to keep herself from crying. Keep it together Abigail keep it together. You are an agent don’t you DARE cry in front of them. Her heart was pounding in her head as she felt herself start to panic, her breath catching in her throat as everything felt like it was going faster and faster around her. Suddenly a loud whistle gained everyone’s attention, stopping the yelling and returning the room back to silence.

“Hey hey, stay with us Abigail.” She flinched as she felt a hand touch her shoulder, breath finally escaping as she glanced to see Natasha looking at her. She gave her a soft smile before turning towards the guys.

“Look, I get you guys are aggravated, but maybe don’t give her a mental breakdown alright?” She felt embarrassed as she was now the center of attention, shaking her head and rubbing her eyes quickly.

“No no I’m fine! Really, I’m an agent. I can take a little yelling.” She noticed her hair a mess now due to her pulling from the ponytail, and proceeded to pull it out and fix it.

“Look, I’m not conspiring to let Loki out or anything. I’m just not fond of constantly attacking people after they’ve already been defeated. I was meant to watch him and nothing else. Not to mention, the entire three or so days we had Loki in custody, today being the fourth, he wasn’t offered food or water, was he?” She looked around to everyone else who just glanced at each other.

“I gave him some water and half a sandwich, it was no big deal. Oh by the way Steve thanks for lunch yesterday. It was really good.” She looked to Tony and straightened up.

“Criminal or not meals are required by law even to those who break them. You can get mad at him and hold a grudge all you want, but they are still a person. A living breathing person. Starving and dehydrating him just because you’re mad makes you just as bad as him. So I gave him some food and we spoke. A little banter about his magic, about his injuries, nothing much. So maybe next time don’t jump on my back the first chance you get?” He grew silent, sighing and glancing down.

“...Let’s talk a little more about this. Abigail, can I get you to wait outside? It won’t take long.” Abigail nodded and got up, walking out of the room and sitting back down at the table where she had taken a nap. She sighed and looked at her hand, staring in thought. So much for no stress, maybe she should try that charm Thor just taught her? Would that even work if she did it? With hesitation, she slowly pressed her hand to her forehead, closing her eyes and taking in a slow deep breath.

“Embrace your dreams through the night, Tomorrow comes with a whole new light..” She felt a warmth slowly engulf her forehead, relaxation filling her subconscious as the phantom screams faded from her thoughts. She sighed relaxing in her seat. Huh, so that really did work. Even for her, even though she didn’t have any magic? The idea of having her own little charm that worked sent a jolt in her chest. It was almost like she could do magic herself. A small smile grew on her lips at the thought. She wondered if she showed Loki. Her mind suddenly froze as she realized what she thought. Nope, this is not happening. She sighed and rubbed her temples. She was not allowed to think like that. If her parents so much as imagined that she gave any care to him, she would be dead. She already had to hope that Fury didn’t update her parents on the situation. That fear in itself caused her mind to be nothing but worries for the next few minutes. Eventually, the doors opened and the Avengers exited. Standing, Abigail met them at the door and followed them out.

“Miss Abigail.” She slowed down when Thor called for her. They slowed down as the rest of the team walked off without another word.

“I’d like to thank you for showing compassion for my brother. The others are angry and rightfully so, but as you said before, my brother is still a person. He doesn’t deserve to rot away in a cell without food or water until he dies.” His face became somber.

“I already thought my brother dead once before, I couldn’t possibly watch him truly die in front of me.” She reached up and patted his shoulder.

“It’s no problem really. So, what did everyone decide?” His eyes began to light up.

“They actually have decided to try your plan, it seems! We’re going to Fury now to tell him the plan.”

“Oh that’s cool. I wonder which agent Fury will send to watch over Loki.” Abigail followed behind the group with Thor, listening to him speak of his girlfriend who lives in New York.

“It’s been a year since you left right? Have you gotten into contact with her?”

“Not quite yet, I’m not entirely sure how.”

“Well Selvig should be a pretty easy answer. You ask him for her number, you have a cell phone right?” He blinked at the term, and Abigail understood pretty quickly.

“That’s a no, okay. Well maybe just ask Selvig where she is. Then you can go and see her yourself.” They all entered Fury’s office and updated him on the plan.

“Well, so Agent Lynn’s plan is the way to go?”

“For now..” Tony grumbled with crossed arms.

“Alright...so who’s going to be the babysitter?”

“Any agents we can trust?” Abigail asked, but noticed everyone looking at her.

“...Wait, me??”

“Agent Lynn, you are the only one who has not only had multiple encounters with Loki, but you’re also the only one who has shown compassion, but also patience. From what we’ve seen in the footage of all your conversations you’ve never allowed yourself to become manipulated by him. If anything we’ve noticed signs of him showing comfort near you. Perhaps we can get information from him if its you taking care of him.”

“Sir I’m...I’m mostly a desk agent.”

“With experience in both martial arts and an extensive background of training since you were six. Not to mention, you’ll be living with the Avengers.” The words stuck with her more than they should have. Living with the Avengers. She wouldn’t have to live with her parents anymore?

“And if it makes you feel any better, you aren’t going to be on vacation during this. You’re just going to be on babysitting duty.”

“About that, considering it’ll be in my headquarters, I’m going to assume she’s going to get put on my business’s salary. You can put her on paid vacation or something, just email me her normal salary so I can pay the due amount for her job. It is going to take all of her time after all.”

“So do I get a say in this or…?”

“Look, this was your plan, so no not really. Besides, any other agent we send will most likely get killed rather instantly.”

“So you think we won’t kill me?”

“There’s a small chance he won’t. Don’t worry you won’t be unarmed.” Tony handed her a watch that seemed to be made of the same material of his suit, seemingly sturdy as she tapped it.

“A little project I’ve been working on with the big guy.” Tony patted Bruce on the back.

“It’s supposed to be powerful enough to take...well...the big guy down. Instead of bullets it’s plasma, more condensed and can shoot through tanks. Though just in case, it needs to be recharged after a few shots.”

“That and I have a kill switch backed up on my computer. So in case any of my stuff gets shot at I can take away your cool gun privileges.” Abigail looked down at the device with a hum.

“So, now all we have to do is get you your clothes. You can go home and-”

“No! No no, that’s fine. I’ll just...go later. I’m pretty tired honestly, so I’ll just um...wait.” They gave her a strange look, nodding and continuing to talk about the plan. She wasn’t going to take the chance of her parents being home. She couldn’t. She wondered just when they would find out about her new job. She hadn’t realized they were bringing her to Stark HQ until there was a car in front of her with the door held open for her.

“Oh we’re going now?”

“Well yeah, we’ll get you settled in your room and bring Loki in later. You sure you don’t need your clothes?”

“Well I...um…” She tried to think of a reason why she couldn’t go into her own house, but found herself blank for ideas. She began to chew her own lip, when a hand landed on her shoulder.

“How about we send a couple agents to get your stuff. Your current assignment is classified anyway, so you won’t have to worry about anyone finding out about it.” She turned and looked towards Clint with wide eyes.

“Oh uh...yeah, that...that works.” He nodded and patted her shoulder before glancing towards Natasha and heading back inside. Getting in the car she glanced towards the building out the window, watching it get further and further away as they drove towards Stark Tower.

“So, strict parents or something?” Natasha asked quietly, the question made Abigail flinch.

“Oh yeah, you know. When your entire family has been Agents since the beginning of SHIELD’s existence there’s...really no room for error.” She rubbed the back of her neck, looking at Natasha as she seemed to analyze her.

“Well don’t worry, a lot less expectations at Stark’s place. Just make sure Loki doesn’t go on another rampage.” She cracked a smile.

“You say it like he’s some sort of beast or something~”

“All men are~” She rolled her eyes and laughed a bit, looking out the window and watching the scenery roll by. Taking the opportunity to catch a few z’s, Abigail took a nap in the car ride there. Usually she wouldn’t let her guard down in such a situation, the entire situation was new to her and even she couldn’t quite explain what was happening. The one thing that she kept rethinking was She was away from her parents, and living away from them. That thought in itself gave her enough serenity to completely pass out, no dreams whatsoever for once.

“Hey Abi, wake up.”

“Mmhm..”

“We’re here, come on.” With a grumble the young agent pulled herself awake, glancing around and noticing they were in fact parked in a parking lot outside of the building.

“How long was I out?”

“Oh you know, just the entire ride. Come on.” She pulled herself out of the car and followed Natasha and Tony into the main entrance. She had to admit the place was impressive. She knew that from the outside, but even the inside it was quite impressive. She hummed in thought as they entered the elevator.

“So, big place…”

“Yup, mine and Pepper’s baby. Now granted there are a few...rooms currently under construction due to the Hulk’s playtime with Loki.”

“I think only you would call that playtime~” He smirked in response.

“Jarvis, what’s the current status of construction?”

“Reconstruction of the damaged rooms are 63% complete.”

“And the agents going to Abigail’s place?”

“Currently picking up all belongings and packing it into the vehicle, sir.”

“Wow, you guys weren’t kidding.”

“Well of course, you will be living here from now on. Can’t really have you running back and forth with your assignment.” She looked ahead, finding herself fiddling with her coat sleeve. She was really doing this? She was….out? The elevator opened, and the group entered the top floor where it seems they already fixed this top layer of damage.

“Your room is back down that hallway, second one on the right. Loki’s room is probably going to be just across from yours so you’ll have eyes on him at all times.” Abigail curiously went to the room he said was hers, and when opening the door her eyes widened. It was a fairly large room with a king sized bed and a closet large enough that she could walk into it.

“Whoa…” She touched the bed and her hand trembled.

“Yup, and wait til you see this.” He pulled out a remote and pressed a button, only for a television to come out of the dresser placed in front of the bed. She looked to Tony as he tossed her the remote. Catching it she looked between the two.

“...Okay this is awesome.” Tony smirked and shot a finger gun towards her.

“Welp, we need to go check on the prisoner of honor. You take the chance to familiarize yourself with the place. Bathroom is three doors down from your room, you saw the bar on your way in, and the kitchen is further down the hall into the main room. Get your rest while you can, I can imagine you won’t get much once he’s here.” The two left Abigail alone in her room, still finding herself speechless from everything. It was happening so fast, that she really didn’t realize it was real. Slowly sitting down on the bed, she set the remote down and looked at herself in the mirror.

“....I’m free…” Those words sent tears down her face, the realization hitting her like a ton of bricks. She curled in on herself, smiling behind her hand as she began to sob uncontrollably.

Finally, she was free.

#loki x y/n #mcu loki #loki of asgard #loki fanfic #loki x oc #chapter 3

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warrocketpodcast · 5 years

Note

Is the "professor x just made a bunch of child soldiers" argument as tired as the "If Batman donated all the money it took to become Batman he'd do more good" line?

.No, but I think there’s an interesting reason why it’s not, and it has a lot to do with textual intent.

In Batman comics, Batman IS the solution to the problems with Gotham City, which we know because WE ARE READING BATMAN COMICS AND THAT IS THE PREMISE, AND IF YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THAT YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND FICTION. Billionaires in the real world? Terrible, inherently immoral. Billionaires in the fictional universe that has shit like Green Lantern rings and x-ray eyes? Literally the only thing keeping a crocodile man from eating your face. Bruce Wayne is a philanthropist on the side, but, as I’ve written before, writing a check to the local school district or offering comprehensive health insurance to employees of Wayne Industries does not solve the problem of A Murder Clown Is Poisoning The Water Supply Right Now. I do not understand why people claim they want to see fucking Batman meet with his accountant and figure out if construction of the Thomas and Martha Wayne Memorial Humanities Building at Hudson University is a good tax write-off for 20 God damned pages every week, which I assure you they do not actually want, but that’s not the point, really. The point is disingenuous refusal to engage with the text. The actual text of Batman comics is that Batman is a good idea.

The actual text of X-Men comics is that Professor X gathered teenagers and, in the guise of a school, turned them into a secretive paramilitary strike force that went on missions where they were sometimes killed. The argument is whether that’s the best way to go about things, which is an argument that people have within those comics. The text tends to come down on the side that he was right to do so because the alternative is getting murdered by giant purple robots made of racism, but there’s still an exploration. It’s why Cyclops is an interesting character, because he’s The Most X-Man — the guy who found out at 15 that he had to learn how to be really good at aiming the uncontrollable laser beams concussive force blasts that shoot out of his eyes because the alternative was that he and everyone he cared about was going to die. Like, that’s something that’s gonna fuck you up pretty bad, but according to the past 50 years of X-Men comics, it’s also 100% true.

With Batman, the question is not “why doesn’t Batman provide real solutions to to the real-world root causes of crime” — because that’s an astoundingly stupid question to ask — it’s “how is Batman going to solve the problems that are presented to him in this fictional universe that is uniquely built around him?”

With the X-Men, the question is usually “how are the X-Men going to survive this experience?” The idea of questioning whether Professor X was wrong all this time is a core component of that.

The former is refusing to engage with the premise. The latter is asking the questions the premise invites. If you don’t like the premise, you don’t have to engage with the media. There’s a lot of stuff out there and if you don’t like Batman because that idea doesn’t make sense to you, I’m not going to hold it against you. I will, however, hold it against you if you try to break the premise to make it worse.

Here’s a huge tangent where I just know I’m gonna get lost in the woods:

I actually feel a similar way to opinions I’ve seen about the MCU, and how it’s built around a very militaristic idea of superheroes, which makes some people uncomfortable. And, you know, that’s fair! Those movies are built around that idea, because they were built on the foundation of a movie that was the absolute embodiment of transitioning from traditional action movies (ie, stories about loose cannon cops, spies, space marines, Kurt Thomas, and other heroes who usually have the backing of a larger organization) and superhero stories (which are almost always about heroes acting independently of, and occasionally in opposition to, those same larger forces). Those movies never really get away from the idea that Tony Stark, the guy who sets the tone for the entire roster of films to follow, is fundamentally a dude whose primary character trait and fatal flaw are that he always believes he can solve his problems by building a bigger gun. The militarized aspect of S.H.I.E.L.D. and the Avengers spins out of this as both a structural result of the action to superhero genre transition, and as a convenience to get Iron Man (former defense contractor), Captain America (literal soldier), Black Widow (spy), the Hulk (military scientist) and Hawkeye (for some reason a spy like in The Ultimates and not a redneck carny like he should’ve been). The odd man out is Thor, which, for all the problems with those first two Avengers movies, is why he first shows up as an antagonist in the first one and then completely bails on the whole thing to go deal with his own stuff on the second one. The military structure is literal plot structure.

So yeah, that gets kind of weird when it filters down to Spider-Man. A lot of that weirdness has to do with things that are beyond the control of the universe, in that Marvel’s most beloved character, the second big success the company ever had whose popularity has endured much stronger than the first one, the flagship superhero who was literally on their paychecks and has never not been popular, had to be a late addition to a universe that already had, like, the Vision in it.

But because they had to work within those constraints, they had to work within the premise they were already given. It makes perfect sense that in that universe, Peter Parker would look up to the world’s most famous superhero nerd, and it makes sense that Iron Man would see Peter as this blank slate that he could stop from making the mistakes that had defined his life. That, to me, is a really interesting dynamic, but it’s also one that requires Spider-Man to take a lot of cues from Iron Man, which is not a dynamic that those two characters ever had in the source material. It winds up giving them different consequences.

And like, if that’s not your thing, I get it. Spider-Man being recruited by the superhero military and having a high-tech suit that talks to him is a jarring shift, even if they do a good job of bringing in most of the core tenets of the character — something about responsibility and... I wanna say... muscles? Is it muscles? — which I think they did. But, if you don’t like that setup, which is a product of the larger universe, then you don’t have to buy into the premise. Like, yeah, it sucks that you’re fundamentally not going to dig this Spider-Man movie, but how do you think I feel? I’m a Batman guy and I literally have to see these movies with their endless terrible premises for my job.

Back when Far From Home came out, I remember seeing someone talk about how the MCU Peter Parker was fundamentally flawed because he didn’t have Uncle Ben, and I don’t think that’s correct. For one thing, Spidey pretty clearly has an Uncle Ben in that movie, it’s just that the reference to him in Civil War is a little less explicit than it usually is, presumably because we’ve seen Uncle Ben die on screen like five times since 2002. Second, it actually makes it make more sense that he’d latch onto the next influential father figure who walked through his front door. Third, even if we got way more Uncle Ben in those movies, it wouldn’t change the fact that the Peter/Tony Stark relationship and the way it played out was a function of the larger universe and the way those two characters had to interact within it. I don’t want to generalize too much or claim to know what people are thinking better than they do, but I’d suspect that if you don’t like that stuff in Spider-Man, the thing you really don’t like is the larger structure of this take on the characters. And that’s fair!

That’s not to say that a premise can’t be bad, or that a twist on a character that posits a new premise is always good by nature of including some of the stuff that works. Again, I’m a Batman guy, and the last three movies to feature Batman are bad partly because the premise is fundamentally broken (the other parts are literally everything else about those movies because they are irredeemably terrible on virtually every level). But, you know, none of them have Batman writing a check instead of fighting crime, so that’s something.

--Chris

#Anonymous

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thebibliomancer · 4 years

Text

Essential Avengers: Avengers #221: ... New Blood!

July, 1982

A semi-famous somewhat imitated cover!

Can you guess ahead of time which two will be joining the Avengers?

No cheating.

Actually, what’s funny is that I can imagine a Young Bendis looking at this cover, seeing Luke Cage, Spider-Man, and Wolverine all in a row like that and whispering to himself ‘one day... one day...’

Spider-Woman is even on this! This is almost the roster meme that Bendis would have selected his team out of.

Just as soon as he cleared the way by killing off Ant-Man and Hawkeye.

Anyway, I like the cute touch that there’s just a completely blank square for Sue Storm. And is she really still going by Invisible Girl at this point?

-google- Ah, Invisible Woman is still a few years off.

And at risk of spoiling, I like the cover pretending that Rom (Space Knight) could feasibly join the Avengers. Although that would have made a hilarious mess when the rights lapsed. A whole swathe of Avengers comics unavailable.

So, where are we at?

Last times on Avengers: Captain America decided that the Avengers had become too unwieldy. They’d settled into a filler rut and Cap wanted them to be lean and mean.

So the old order changeith’d! And Moondragon meddled, causing half of the old team to quit. But Cap got his lean team of himself, Thor, Iron Man, Wasp, Yellowjacket, and Tigra.

And then Yellowjacket Hank Pym had an ‘attempted murder out of insecurity’ breakdown and tried to murder his friends and was a very bad husband to Wasp as well.

So Yellowjacket was out and Wasp took some personal time.

It was just Cap, Thor, Iron Man, and Tigra. And then Tigra quit.

Wasp rejoined but the trim team of six had become anemic at four and after some space mishaps, its finally time to try to do something about that.

As Iron Man declares in title-of-the-issue font they need some ... NEW BLOOD!

And Wasp declares ‘yes we all know that already we’ve just been putting it off.’

(And they finally got the big meeting table back from the cleaners or wherever its been. Thank goodness)

But the question that Chairperson Wasp poses the team is should they re-induct some ex-members or go looking for some truly new blood?

Thor is brooding on the recent events, where Moondragon manipulated the Avengers previous roster shakeup and later when Moondragon took over a planet and got Thor to fight his friends.

So Thor’s point, by way of dwelling, is that they should be careful with who they choose.

Thor: “Thus can no action, no thought made by any of us in the last weeks be truly, absolutely claimed as our own. Not even... mine.”

There we go. There’s that good Moondragon induced paranoia I was hoping for.

And character wise, I do like that there’s fallout from the Ba-Bani misadventure. Whether being forced to fight his friends or being made to fall in love with Moondragon or being convinced to side with her plan to bring mandatory peace to the universe. Thor has been affected by what happened.

Cap suggests that they clear the slate and just judge potential members on their current qualifications.

So what qualifications should potential Avengers have?

Captain America: “Compatibility. Someone who can work in a team.”

Iron Man: “And technical expertise. Perhaps someone good with weaponry.”

Thor: “We’ve enough strength, methinks. But courage is important. Aye, and a noble heart.”

Wasp: “Well, I know exactly what this group needs. More girls!”

Good suggestions. All good suggestions. But very good suggestion from Wasp.

I know that two women on one team is the low bar that Avengers tends to reach but you know what’s worse? One women on one team. And you know what’s better? Three.

Think about it.

The meeting gets cut short because Jan has to go do Jan things like show off fashion at the Tavern on the Green but she tells the others to figure out who they’d like as new Avengers and then they’ll all decide at their meeting next week.

As the Avengers all head off, Captain America mentions to Iron Man that hey remember how Hawkeye used to be an Avenger all the time? Weren’t those good times? He worked well on the team, was real into being an Avenger.

Iron Man agrees that sure is a Thought but flies off thinking more about Jan’s suggestion to have more women on the team, albeit probably for less than pure reasons.

Thor meanwhile doesn’t have anywhere to be so sits down in the sitting room and reads a Time magazine.

Jarvis brings Thor some mead and Thor asks who Jarvis would enlist for the Avengers if Jarvis was given the choice.

Jarvis is surprised to be asked but does his best to speak off the cuff.

Jarvis: “Why, I - I really hadn’t given it much thought! But since you ask, I feel that some of the best Avengers have started as the most unlikely candidates. For example, those with strongly individual, independent natures seem to have worked out surprisingly well.”

You’re a good guy, Jarvis.

And you’ve got a good point. Since the Avengers were pretty much everyone who wasn’t on a team jammed onto a team together, the Avengers kind of have as foundation strongly individual independent superheroes managing to do a teamwork anyway.

And Thor just so happens to be reading the Time magazine that has a picture of Spider-Man on the front (along with “Friend or Menace?”) and thinks huh individual and independent??

Oh boy!

Spider-Man going to be offered a spot on the Avengers? Is it 2005 already?

Goofs aside, this is an interesting callback maybe.

All the way back in Amazing Spider-Man Annual #3 (November, 1966) which I didn’t cover but probably should have if this was a more comprehensive Avengers blog but then I may have died under the enormity of the task.

Uh, that sentence got away from me.

Anyway, in that Spider-Man Annual, the Avengers debate whether to recruit Spider-Man for their team. Thor is the one there to find Spider-Man and bring him to the mansion. The Avengers decide to test him and (after Spider-Man tries to beat up the entire team because that’s what Spider-Man thinks proving himself is) they send him to bring the Hulk back with him.

He finds the Hulk and fights the Hulk but Hulk turns back to Bruce Banner and Spider-Man feels bad for Bruce and doesn’t want to turn him over to the Avengers (not knowing that they want to help Hulk). So he comes back and says welp couldn’t find him guess I’m not Avengers material byyyyyye.

The other Avengers go huh I guess he wasn’t Avengers material but Thor seemed to suspect what had really happened.

So my rambling point is that its appropriate that Thor again thinks to recruit Spider-Man for the Avengers because of that previous story.

Later in the day, Iron Man calls Captain America.

Although as Cap points out they know each other’s civilian name now so why be formal?

Iron Man: “Captain America? This is Iron Man.”

Captain America: “Hey, Tony, let’s make it ‘Steve,’ okay? I’m off duty.”

So Tony “Iron Man” Stark has managed to stop thinking about more woman on the Avengers and has actually started to think about having Hawkeye back on the Avengers and has to admit, it sounds good to him!

So Captain Steve says they should go together tomorrow and see what Hawkeye thinks.

This is a nice sequence.

Its nice to see how the two learning each other’s identity plays out like this. Tony trying to stick to how they’ve known each other and Steve making a not subtle overture for them to become more familiar.

This is probably good shipping fodder, I realize!

But it is also good friendshipping fodder. It can be both.

Elsewhere and meanwhile, at the Van Dyne residence, Janet puts her own recruitment drive into... drive?

She’s invited every super-heroine in the country she can think of to brunch but she has no idea how to get a hold of She-Hulk.

Not even her state of the art computer system can find her! Granted, the state of the art computer system is for analyzing fashion forecasts and not news reports about She-Hulk sightings.

So Jan decides that if you want a She-Hulk you’ve got to spend a little green.

She has her assistant take out a bunch of full-page ads in all of the major west coast newspapers. And heck, buy a bunch of commercial time too!

Jan is going to do some I Want You (to Join the Avengers) ads!

She is ludicrously wealthy.

I went and checked and her original inheritance was ‘only’ three million dollars but the way that she throws around money I’m pretty sure she has managed to get some lucrative investments. That or she’s just super good at being a fashionista.

Granted, blowing a bunch of money for a chance to have brunch with She-Hulk is a pretty good reason to blow a bunch of money.

Later, as twilight comes, Thor is flying around Central Park because he has no idea how to find Spider-Man but hears that he’s often around “the meadow-lands called Central Park” and happens upon three goofuses who just robbed a pawnshop.

These goofuses are such goofuses that one of them is wearing groucho glasses as a disguise. Another one is wearing a clown mask.

Which, like a moth to fire, aggros Spider-Man just to mock the guy.

I’m pretty sure rather than flying around aimlessly, the best way to find Spider-Man is to create the perfect quip opportunity.

A clown: “I’m gonna kiss every dime o’ my share -- just as soon as we get to the hideout so’s I can take off this stupid mask!”

Spider-Man, suddenly: “Aw, c’mon, Bunky, leave it on! I’ve always wanted to bust a bozo who looks like a bozo!”

Groucho: “S-s-spider-Man!”

S-s-spider-Man: “But enough of this clowning! Wanna give up?”

Dangit, Peter. Good wordplay.

But before can catch these thieves just like flies, down came the rain and washed the spider out.

A sudden, inexplicable (cough cough Thor) localized storm tosses around the thieves until they surrender.

After the police lead away the goofus thieves, Spider-Man comes dripping wet and with a bone to pick.

Spider-Man: “Do you have any idea what it’s like running around in wet tights?”

Thor is like sorry bro but I’ve come to talk so Spider-Man agrees but they’ll need to go off somewhere private because the press is honing in on him to ask him bonkers questions about whether he came in a flying saucer.

I think they’re thinking of a certain emissary of hell.

That darn press!

Spider-Man and Thor relocate to a high rooftop for their talk.

Spider-Man: “Now, Goldilocks, what’s your beef?”

Thor: “Thy protective demeanor is unneeded, my friend. I have no ‘beef’ -- only a proposal. The Avengers are seeking new members, and I wouldst offer thee such position.”

Spider-Man: “You... Thor... want me as an Avenger?

Spider-Man is still not sure if it would work out (reflecting on Spider-Man Annual #3) but he’s also really flattered by the offer. And presumably how the offer wasn’t accompanied by “BUT FIRST YOU MUST PASS OUR TEST!”

So he can’t just accept the offer off-hand but he’s definitely going to think about it.

Even if you don’t join the team, even just being considered is an honor.

The twilight turns into night turns into day, and Cap and Iron Man show up in Hawkeye’s place of business to bug him.

Don’t know if you remember but Hawkeye has a cushy job as head of security for Cross Technological Enterprises. And he actually does take the job seriously which is why he’s a little concerned, at least for his professional pride, that Cap and Iron Man got past his guards.

Cap: “Avengers priority -- never leave home without it. In fact, we’ve come to offer it to you.”

Smooth. Smooth, Cap.

Although I do like that they can just march up to the guards of this company and go ‘hey let us in we’re avengers’ and its not even a ‘ok i’ll clear it with head of security hawkeye’ its ‘yeah sure go right in and do you want any paperclips?’

Anyway, Hawkeye has his pride so he tells Cap not to expect him to come crawling back after the Avengers booted him out (actually Gyrich because Gyrich wanted the Avengers to have some ding dang diversity. Its weirdly the least assholeish thing he’s ever done although he approached it very much in an asshole way).

Point being, they kicked Hawkeye out and he has a new super cool job now.

Iron Man takes this show of wounded pride in wounded stride, just asking that Hawkeye consider it and let them know when he makes a decision.

But Hawkeye doubts he’ll decide to come back to the Avengers because he’s got a good thing in this steady, respectable paying job which comes with job security and respect!

And then, suddenly struck by the realization that he, Hawkeye, is turning down a drama implosion like the Avengers to do the adult thing?? Hawkeye doesn’t like what he’s become.

And he stares in horror at the trappings of power and respectability. The sex and the drugs.

Or a Playboy magazine and a personalized coffee cup, at least.

And he decides to give Iron Man his answer right then and there.

Which, of course, involves shooting arrows. This is Hawkeye we’re talking about.

What’s amazing is that we’ll learn later this issue that he’s going to keep his security job and do Avengers on top of that (and in fairness most of the Avengers don’t have Avengers as their only thing). But he just shot an arrow through a glass door in his place of employment.

But you don’t hire Hawkeye if you don’t expect that kind of thing so I can see why it wouldn’t impact his job.

So that’s Hawkeye as a YES and Spider-Man as a ‘I’ll get back to you.’ And as the weekend arrives, it’s time for Janet van Dyne’s superheroine brunch.

And on the hill above the van Dyne house, its our old pal Fabian Stankowicz.

Remember? The Mechano-Marauder? Built a robot suit to beat up the Avengers, none of them took him that seriously? Iron Man beat him up solo without trying very hard and then got angry about Hank Pym?

Anyway, he’s back, somehow, and he’s salty about the less than dignified experience he had in issue 217. But this time, he has a new plan!

Fabian Stankowicz: “They laughed at me! Mocked me! But I’ll show the Avengers that the Mechano-Marauder is not to be toyed with! I’ll attack their weakest member when the others aren’t around! She’ll be helpless! *Heh-heh-heh*”

Well. Good luck with that, my dude.

Sue Storm-Richards, the Invisible Girl, arrives and Jan introduces her to the other prospective Avengers: Dazzler, Spider-Woman, and Black Widow.

All good candidates, really.

Especially Dazzler.

Well, Beast left and Tigra left so somebody needs to be the new funny person.

Apparently, Spider-Woman doesn’t like puns because she immediately starts getting catty with Dazzler.

Spider-Woman: “Nice going, Blaire! You’re showing all the polish and poise of a real pro!”

Dazzler: “Oh? And I suppose crawling on walls like some yucky insect is ‘professional’?”

Spider-Woman: “I sting, too”

I guess, they have some history in Dazzler’s own book that didn’t go over well. Black Widow has to lean over and tell them to cut the shit out for Jan’s sake.

But then the last invited guest shows up.

ITS A SHE-HULK!

She saw the ads and she’s come for the free food!

Relatable.

Outside, Jan’s chauffeur Mr. Carrothers sits on the limo taking a smoke break and reflecting how good he has it working for the Wasp. Good pay, casual hours. The most he can complain about is that it gets a little boring sometimes.

That’s probably tempting fate because the All-New All-Different Mechano-Marauder stomps up to the house. Remember how Fabian threw the limo last time? Mr. Carrothers remembers.

He panics and runs into the house and tries to warn the assembled heroes.

And yet.

They didn’t really leap to action, huh? I mean, I get it. Brunch.

Even after the robot fist has punched through Wasp’s frankly ludicrous window and kidnapped Dazzler, Wasp is more annoyed than anything.

Wasp: “Fabian Stankowicz, you get that thing out of my living room!”

And then has to explain to her guests that Fabian is some chump that Iron Man beat up and that he wants to make a name for himself by defeating the Avengers. And Sue is like ah yes I understand completely.

But chump or not, Black Widow decides that they should rescue Dazzler.

Dazzler: “I don’t think I need saving, folks! This guy’s just holding, not squeezing!”

And so much for the brunch bunch taking this any amount of serious.

Sue just puts up a quick invisible dome to keep Fabian from getting to the rest of them which the Mechano-Marauder instantly bonks into and bangs on impotently demanding that they let him in.

Careful, Fabian.

You’re memeing yourself.

Dazzler saves herself when she gets tired of being carried around. She does her Dazzler thing with the bright pulse of light, blinding Fabian.

He drops Dazzler but she’s caught by She-Hulk.

The blinded Mechano-Marauder drives around blindly, thinking “These women aren’t even Avengers! They can’t beat me!”

Alas, Dazzler decides the same decision she decided in #211, that she’s a singer, not a fighter.

And Sue also decides to head off, saying that she’s too busy with the Fantastic Four anyway.

Shame.

But can we talk about the sheer audacity that Jan had of trying to poach Sue from the Fantastic Four to the Avengers? The nerve! The verve!

So that’s two of her candidates declining but that still leaves Spider-Woman, Black Widow, and She-Hulk.

And unfortunately for Mechano-Marauder, the first two are the two that have decided to kick his ass a little for entertainment reasons.

Spider-Woman’s venom blast damages one of the giant robot fists and Black Widow swings around Hoth-style and trips the Mechano-Marauder into the ornamental pond.

Alas, after literally dunking a giant robot into a pond, both Spider-Woman and Black Widow turn down the offer to join the Avengers.

Black Widow has private business that are keeping her busy. And Spider-Woman doesn’t even offer an excuse.

In fairness, she has her own solo book over in California and that’s a heck of a commute. I’m actually impressed that she came all this way for brunch.

Fabian is fed up with being treated as an after-thought in his own fight scene and bursts out of the pond, yelling how he’s going to destroy them all!

All.... uh, two that’s left at this point. Yup, he sure is going to destroy all two of them.

She-Hulk has been fairly low-key this whole story, especially for She-Hulk. I’m pretty sure she came to the brunch just for the food and she hasn’t reacted much to Fabian, even when the others were. She caught Dazzler but she hasn’t had much to say since arriving. She’s mostly been standing with her hands on her hips, watching things play out.

But I guess she’s gotten tired of Fabian. Or maybe it falls to her as the last guest.

She tells him to shut up and breaks his robot suit with one punch.

Fabian has one last trick up his Mechano-Marauder sleeve but its a dumb one.

His ejector seat is actually a backup robot suit. Annnd, its so heavy that it sinks into the ground. Trapping him.

Good job, Fabian.

She-Hulk goes to give him one more punch but Wasp stops her. Because she wants a shot at him.

And wow! What a shot!

At full not small size she crosses the streams to focus her bio-power stings into one concentrated beam and blows a hole in Fabian’s escape suit.

I’ve talked before about how Wasp’s pew pew stings have seemingly gotten souped up under Shooter and I think this is another good example. I mean, she’s not blowing up a house but combining the blasts to do precision boring is another cool application we haven’t seen before.

Anyway, now Wasp goes teeny and flies into the hole she made and up into the helmet to blast Fabian in the face. So hard his helmet flies off.

Wasp: “That’ll teach ‘im for ruining my party!”

And that’s that for brunch.

Days later, Jarvis calls the State Department to request official clearance for two new members.

And we see part of the process of that. Interesting if you’re interested in the logistics of an officially recognized superhero team.

I guess what’s interesting is that Henry Peter Gyrich is still part of the process.

You’d think he’d have been replaced or something after the Avengers very publicly embarrassed him and got emancipated from him. I guess he keeps doing the necessary liaison stuff without ever talking to them.

The requests for the two new members cross Gyrich’s desk and he takes it to the White House where the request gets signed by Ronald Reagan.

(The two new members are Hawkeye and She-Hulk by the by. We see it on the paperwork. Guess Spider-Man is still thinking it over.)

Anyway, I guess its interesting that new Avengers are a matter that goes all the way up to the president.

God, I’m glad that for the modern team, Cap told the US government to fuck off because I don’t want to even think about that still being a thing.

The next day after the paperwork is signed, Hawkeye is on his way to Avengers Mansion in a cab. He’s reading a Time magazine about the change in the Avengers’ roster and reflecting that it’ll be hard to hold down two jobs but worth it because he’s missed the adventure.

Check out the Time magazine though.

The cover of this comic book issue is in-universe the cover of Time magazine! That’s neat.

But Hawkeye’s cab is suddenly cut off by a pink Cadillac.

And Hawkeye being Hawkeye doesn’t just grumble and go about his day. He commits assault. Because this is Hawkeye.

The guy that Cap and Iron Man wanted back for being a good team-player.

So he gets out of the cab and shoots the pink Cadillac with an EMP arrow that fries the car’s electrical system.

Really abusing that Avengers Priority Status already, huh, Hawkeye?

The one mistake he made is that the pink Cadillac belongs to She-Hulk. She in fact earned it by doing a car commercial for Wacky Willie’s Wheels-And-Deals so you might imagine she’s fond of it.

So she picks up the cab with Hawkeye in it and leans it against a lightpole.

And then she picks up the Cadillac on her shoulder and walks off with it.

She-Hulk knows how to make a lasting impression, I’ll say that.

But soon after he gets down from the taxi and stops in at an ER to make sure he’s not concussed, Hawkeye arrives at Avengers Mansion to rejoin the team.

Hawkeye: “Okay, folks, life can go on -- Hawkeye’s here!”

Iron Man: “And it’s about time! We were starting to get worried. What happened?”

Hawkeye: “Oh, nothin’ much -- not ‘til some freaky Amazon tried to play dominoes with my taxi!”

She-Hulk, lurking silhouetted by the window: “‘Amazon’, eh? I don’t suppose it could have been -- a green Amazon?”

That is a powerful energy you have there, She-Hulk. Powerful energy and a power move in a power suit.

And that’s how Hawkeye’s day was ruined. Also how the two new additions to the team start with bad blood.

Conflict! We gotta have it!

Wasp: “Hawkeye, She-Hulk. I’d like to officially welcome you both. From now on -- you’re one of us. We’re one of you. And we’re all -- THE AVENGERS!”

Jan’s trying a new thing where she kisses every new member. And they both have to bend down a little for her.

Also, another new Wasp costume! Wasp gonna Wasp!

This is another good, light-hearted decompression issue. The Moondragon two-parter had some yuks but also mind-control sex and Drax’s brain melting. So this time Wasp throws a brunch and Cap and Iron Man help Hawkeye escape the drudgery of an adult job.

There’s a lot of what could have been with Wasp’s guest list. What if she could convince Sue Storm to take a break from the Fantastic Four to try being on the Avengers.

She’ll join later, in the Worst Roster but she’ll join with Reed. I’m thinking more of a thing where Sue gets some time away from the family. I don’t think it could last long and it would need the Avengers and FF writer to be on the same page but I think it could be interesting - Sue getting to be on a team where she doesn’t have to be the adult in the room and doesn’t have to work alongside the family.

It’s a similar reason to why I’d like to see adult Cyclops join the Avengers. He’s so tied in with X-stuff and being the leader of X-stuff that I want to take him out of that context and see a new side of him.

Spider-Woman and Black Widow also could have been interesting. They’ll both become Avengers later. I don’t know that Dazzler ever did and she presents interesting opportunities.

The Avengers have had Wonder Man who was also trying to break into acting while being an Avenger. So Dazzler trying to pursue her singing career might just be a retread of that but what if she were more successful and was a celebrity on the team.

The Avengers kind of are celebrities but I think it’d be a different feel if they had a famous (disco) singer on the team.

Interesting stuff (for me) to think about, anyway.

Something else to talk about is the creative credits. Jim Shooter is credited for plotting but Dave Michelinie as writer. And looking ahead, Shooter is not going to be the solo writer again in the near future.

I think we’re getting to the point where Shooter’s going to be too busy with EIC duties to keep up writing the Avengers. He’s going to get plotting credits for a few more issues, probably loose threads he’s handing to other writers.

So the second Shooter run is going to end soon. Shame. Very much a shame. It wasn’t a very long run but he put a lot of energy and humor into the book.

Next time: Egghead’s back and he’s bringing a new Masters of Evil. Wow, it’s been a while since we’ve had them and they’re supposed to be the Avengers’ evil opposite team.

And Egghead is the not very impressive criminal mastermind who couldn’t beat Hank Pym so instead framed him for crime. Hopefully the new Masters rise above that level of menace.

Follow @essential-avengers because I’m bringing you the She-Hulk content you crave. I assume. I took a poll and one out of one person said ‘this is the She-Hulk content I crave’ and I extrapolated from that. Also you should like and reblog because She-Hulk would want you to.

#Avengers #Mechano Marauder #Iron Man #Captain America #Thor #the Wasp #Spider Man #Hawkeye #Invisible Girl #Dazzler #Spider Woman #she hulk #Black Widow #essential avengers #ten issues since the last one that had a bunch of guest stars #its a bunch of guest stars and a roster change!#essential marvel liveblogging

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pendragonfics · 4 years

Text

Bird Brain

Paring: Clint Barton/Reader

Tags: female reader, doctor reader, domestic avengers, avengers tower, age difference -- older man/younger woman, domestic fluff, humor, deaf Clint Barton, Clint Barton needs a hug, fluff

Summary: She's a doctor and patches up the Hawkeye almost every day. He's an Avenger, and somehow, hasn't realised that she's been into him for ages.

Word Count: 2386

Current Date: 2020-02-15

They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, but whoever said that never had to deal with Clint Barton every forty-eight hours. It wasn’t that you didn’t like the man - what wasn’t there to like? No, it was the fact that the man was constantly getting hurt. Shooting himself in the foot (literally). Falling over, losing his hearing aid, being stabbed by bad guys, needing an emergency tetanus shot when he got cut by a rusted nail and was very due for his shots.

It didn’t hurt that he was quite a looker, under all the bandages. Nice smile, kind eyes, and when he was actually taking care of himself and eating right, he had a rockin’ bod. If anyone caught you favouring him to the other Avengers who came by your station in the Tower, you’d say it was purely professional (when in actual fact, if he’d ever ask, you’d say yes to drinks in an instant).

The hardest part, though, was that every one of the team knew that you liked Clinton F. Barton, except him.

Bucky and Sam had a bet going on between the team of how long it was going to take Clint; so far, the stakes were high, and almost everyone was in on it. It had gone on for years, and only once had Clint almost walked in on a group of them talking about it, but he brushed it off. It seemed that you had chosen one of the densest Avenger as your heartthrob. Early on, Tony Stark had given you shit for being so young (to which Thor smacked him on the underside of his head for). Then, when he got over the age-gap, it was all, if you’re into older men why are you all heart-eyed over the Hawkeye when I’m literally here? Gradually over time, he let it go and moved on to other fish to fry.

After losing his hearing aid again on a mission, Clint is seated before you, looking at his hands. You can’t imagine the pressure he would be under as a man without powers in the Avengers and living with a disability, but he’s never spoken about it. You look up from where you’re running diagnostics, hoping that Tony’s bottomless credit card can purchase some tech for Clint that won’t fall out (his words) next time.

Once you have his attention, you sign, ‘You can tell me if you lost them on purpose.’

There’s a pause, and his face cracks that custom-made Clint Barton grin. He’s running on full-strength coffee or adrenaline these days, and it kills you to see him beating himself up all the time. He’s only human.

‘Blame gravity, not me.’ He frowns, and adds, ‘You believe me?’

‘Sure, and JFK is alive.’ You reply, laughing. He scrunches his nose up at that, trying to not show a smile, but you can see in his eyes, those tired eyes that lived off coffee and adrenaline, that there was some part of him that thought your quip was humorous.

Right then, Agent Romanoff walked in. If anyone had ever the self-esteem feel good about themselves in a room with her in it, they were lying. Her red hair was in a yoga bun, and she wore that black catsuit tied half-down around her waist. The only thing un-sexy about her was the fact there was a growing red stain beneath the button-down shirt. Clint seemed to get the message and signed his goodbyes to both of you as Natasha took his place on your examination table.

“Did I just ruin a moment?” she asked, unbuttoning her shirt unprompted.

There was a bullet in her lower abdomen, luckily the other side of her heart, and judging from the wound, was still inside. You move your hands toward the wound, and quickly assess before you pull on fresh gloves. She watches you, and lies down, administering herself the pain relief that you hand to her. Hopefully, her wound won’t need surgery.

“You say that like you’re sorry for coming in,” you reply, cleaning around the area.

Luckily, she doesn’t laugh, because that would hurt her wound. “But was it?” she pokes.

“Give me a break, I’m in love, not hopeless.” You retort, trying to stay professional. “…I mean, who even shot you, anyway? Didn’t your last mission end yesterday?”

“That’s classified. I’m a bad bitch like that,” she smirks, and unintentionally, you touch a tender area and she winces at the pain. Unfortunately for the Black Widow, she will need surgery. Before you move to page another medic, she places a hand on yours, and you look at her for a moment silently until she speaks. “…I know you’re not hopeless, ________, but it’s been three years, and if he can’t see you,” she gestures toward you like you’re the Mona Lisa or someone worth her time, “he doesn’t deserve you.”

---

Game Night Fridays were a thing, apparently. Something that you hadn’t been a part of until Doctor Banner roped you into being his partner for a table tennis tournament. The only rule was that you had to wear a stripy shirt, use no abilities to win the match, and have fun! (according to a retired Captain America, who you, after all, this time can’t believe survived coming out of the ice). Doctor Banner’s usual partner, the android Vision, was taking a long weekend with Wanda, his new fiancée to Miami.

That’s why you were stood in front of the table tennis table beside the sometimes-Hulk, sometimes-professor, all-times awkward walking Dad Joke Doctor Banner, wearing a striped shirt. On the other side of the table, Thor cracks his knuckles, and Clint flips the paddle in his hand and catches it like a cocky sportsman.

“Remember, to play fair!” Steve calls out, refereeing. He’s exempt of the mandatory ugly striped shirt, and holds a whistle in his teeth, about to blow. He’s very sports coach chic, looking very much an all-American hero.

“Or not,” Sam sasses, before the whistle blows, “and make it a match to remember!” He whoops.

Though the pair of them were Captain America, they had a different taste of how to serve their patriotic justice. The whistle is shrill, piercing, and Clint serves the orange ball.

Bruce hits it back, and Thor returns, and Bruce hits once more. You dive after it when Clint serves it back, and onward it goes. After a while, you take note of everyone’s style. Clint goes for tricky shots, and Thor uses the power behind the paddle to make fast ones. Bruce is reserved and stays on his side of the table, and with everything going on, you’re having to pick up the slack. You have a feeling that if Vision was here, he’d be a formidable player. Your reflexes are nothing on actual Avengers.

When Bruce misses the shot from Thor, you can see your teammate get tense, a tinge of green growing from beneath his collar.

“DoctorBanner, I think you should take a time out,” you tell him, but he shakes it off.

The next hit is quickly lost, and then it’s your turn to hit it. Clint’s making a funny face, and it throws you off momentarily, and you hit air instead of the ball. Thor roars with thunderous laughter. Doctor Banner looks more and more lime-green than his usual olive-tone. When Thor serves, it’s too fast, and it hits Bruce in the cheek, leaving a mark on his face.

The room gets quiet.

You place a hand on his shoulder, looking at the man. “Let’s get some air.”

You lead him away from the main room, out to the balcony adjacent to the main floor of the Avengers Tower communal area. Behind you, the Avengers resume their casual conversation, and the volume of the room goes from sterile to friendly. But just as you walk Bruce to the night air, Tony takes your place. He’s also not in a stripy shirt, and he wordlessly trades places with you, going in your stead to comfort the green doctor.

It’s easy enough to excuse yourself after that. Unlike the Avengers, you don’t get any time off, and the weekends are spent shadowing Doctor Cho at her clinic, and that starts early tomorrow morning. You say a quick goodbye to Sam and Bucky, who half-acknowledge you over their game of checkers (Bucky is playing red, and losing badly), and descend via the stairs. But halfway down, you hear someone behind and turning, you see Clint Barton.

His new hearing aid glows dimly in the hallway, and so goes his goofy smile. But there’s a different look in his eyes than usual, and you don’t know if right now you’re about to feel everything that you’ve been waiting for from him, or not.

He sticks his hand out to you, to shake. “Good game,” he says.

You smile. “Yeah, uh, it was a good game.”

“…it’s a shame you don’t come every Friday, ‘cause that was fun.” He adds, walking past you, continuing down the stairs. You take the cue and follow him the same way you were headed, down to the street. Most people take the elevator, in the once-Stark tower, but the stairs are oddly relaxing. “Maybe we can rush Viz and Wanda into a shotgun wedding, and we can play again some time.”

“I don’t really -,” you sigh, looking down. Clint frowns, and you don’t repeat yourself. You forget sometimes when he’s verbal and wearing the aid that he can’t hear everything. “Yeah. Maybe.”

---

For some reason, Clint Barton does not get hurt for three weeks. For three weeks, he keeps his hearing aids in one piece. He doesn’t get shot, stabbed or become unstable on a rooftop. He’s nowhere to be seen near your end of the woods. You spend your time catching up on paperwork, working on the medical profiles of the Avengers…and missing him.

It’s hard, because every time you give up on him, he comes back. And yet…there’s no sign of him.

Until there is. The Quinjet acts as a medivac, and arrives loudly, landing on the roof. S.H.I.E.L.D. agents escort a stretcher out, and you’re hastily called to action alongside the other medical professionals that have been called in. It’s barely five o’clock in the afternoon, one hour until you’re allowed to go home to binge-watch America’s Funniest Home Videos, but when you see who’s nigh comatose in the stretcher, your heart almost stops.

“How the hell -,” you cry out, starting to worry.

“Language!” says everyone, except Steve Rogers.

“-There was an ambush, Doctor ________. He was shot at by a sniper, but he managed to remove himself from 75 per cent of the ranged weapons range. He has three wounds of varying degrees of severity and is currently on a high dosage of pain medication to get him here.” Vision reports, helping the agents move the bed toward the elevator, to your set up.

“Thank you,” you tell him, and look at Clint. He looks so peaceful and would appear to be sleeping well if not for the two shots by his collar bone. “Okay, I need everyone scrubbed up, I need a dose of morphine prepped for when this wears off, call a surgeon in and - Doctor Cho, ready your cradle.” You speak hastily and remember afterwards that you’re not the head doctor on staff. “…sorry. Just, um, get him better.”

“________...” Clint says, woozily.

You look down to see him. His eyes are partly open, and slowly, his mouth opens to bare his teeth in a loose grin. His hands are soft, and reach for you blindly, but can’t seem to coordinate himself. He’s high off his face on the medicine, and you take his hand in yours, holding it tight.

“Yeah, I’m here.” You reach for his face, pushing his dirty blonde hair back. “It’s me.”

“You’re like, the best.” He says.

From across the room, you hear a nurse snicker quietly.

“You’re so…good at your job,” he slurs. “…and I’m like, Hawkbutt.”

“Hawkeye,” you correct.

“That’s the same thiiing,” he drawls. “…I’m a butt. I am. A. Butt. Heh. Butt.” He prattles.

“You’re not a butt, Clint. You’re a hero.” You tell him.

Doctor Cho comes behind you and places a hand on your shoulder. “I think it’s best if you sit out on this. You’re too close to the patient to take care of him.” She pauses. “It’s for the best.”

“I heard that! My hearing - aid - I heard that” Clint adds. “You’re right, Doctor Cho, she shouldn’t. Because,” he takes a deep breath in, as the other medical professionals swarm around him, readying the assessment before taking care of him, “Be-because I want to marry that lady. She’s the best.”

The room gets uncomfortably quiet, with just the EKG in the background.

His hand slackens off yours, moving over to his chest. That smile of his widens, albeit unfocused. He yawns, and looking your way, says with his hands just as he’s administered another round of drugs, his motions sloppy, but forgivable,

‘I love you,’ he signs.

You feel tears prick in your eyes. “Clint,” you reply, reaching for his arm. His pulse is weakening, the medically induced coma coming on, and he looks to you with his fading consciousness. You sign, just for him to see, ‘I love you too.’

---

It’s another six months until Clint Barton is cleared to go back to fieldwork, but that day comes and goes, and he’s still hanging around the Avengers Tower, this time in your surgery not for health reasons. The archery Avenger follows you around like a lost puppy in love, and to be perfectly honest, you wouldn’t have it any other way. Tony Stark went back to his teasing and kept the security tape of that day, archived in F.R.I.D.A.Y. under ‘Birdbrain & the Doc’ - a file he won’t change the name of. But it’s okay.

Even though he’s older, and you’re younger, he’s a combatant, and you’re a medic, he’s a coffee drinker and you prefer tea, you swear up and down that you’re as fond as ever for the dense archery master Clint, and you wouldn’t have it any other way.

#clint barton #clint #clint barton x reader #hawkeye x reader #hawkeye #hawkeye/reader #Avengers #avengers x reader #marvel fanfic #marvel x reader #choatic--lovely #pendragonfics #Female reader

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just-random-obsessions · 4 years

Text

Funny Moments In Avengers 1 (this time with gifs!)

Find Thor 1 here

Find Thor 2 here

In hindsight, I probably shoulda done this either before or right after Thor 1 but I’m horrible at planning so. This post is going to be listing the humor in Avengers 1 and then giving some thoughts afterwards. Post starts underneath the tag list. If you want to be added/removed from the tag list, let me know.

Tag List: @fyrecrafted @lokijiro @nikkoliferous @miskiett @icyxmischief @iamanartichoke @juliabohemian @Official-and-unstable-satan @darthxerik @melodylnoelle @just-another-human-2019 @fandomsfanfictions @mentallydatingahotcelebrity @cateyes315 @burningarbiterheart @imnotacreepijustlikeyou @usedtobegoodfriend96 @alexakeyloveloki

Also, side note but I find it kinda interesting how the humor doesn’t start till several minutes after the film starts when the arms dealer guy is interrogating Natasha.

~ Arms dealer: “you listen carefully” Coulson: *bitch you listen carefully*

~ “I’m working! This idiot is giving me everything” “I don’t give her everything”

~ “Let me put you on hold” *Coulson waiting very quietly as he listens to Natasha’s hold music which consists of bones breaking*

~ “Oh I’ve got Stark. You get the big guy” *Natasha DEFINITELY saying “fuck” in a different language*

~ “Should’ve got paid up front Banner”

~ “Doctor we’re facing a potential global catastrophe” “oh no those I try to actively avoid”

~ “What does Fury want me to do [with the Tesseract]? Swallow it?”

~ “Is there anything you can tell us about the Tesseract? “You should’ve left it in the ocean

~ “Ten bucks says you’re wrong [about being surprised by new things]” *Steve later giving Fury $10*

~ “How does it look?” “Like Christmas but with more me”

~ “Give yourself some credit please. Give yourself 12% of the credit.” “12%?! Of my baby?!” “An argument could be made for 15”

~ “You have reached the life model decoy of Tony Stark. Please leave a message”

~ “Phil! Come in!” “Um his first name is Agent”

~ *I know nothing about the Avengers initiative but I do know that my boyfriend is a dick sometimes*

~ *Pepper saying something racy in Tony’s ear*

~ *Both of the men’s faces*

~ “The guy’s like a Stephen Hawking.” *?????* “He’s like a smart person”

~ “I watched you while you were sleeping” *wow I should’ve stayed in the ice cause this convo went sideways real quick*

~ *Loki straight up sassing the asshole who tortured him like the Queen he is*

~ “Did he ask you to sign his captain America trading cards yet?” Trading cards?” “They’re vintage. He’s very proud”

~ “Really? They want me in a submerged pressurized metal container”

~ “Oh no this is much worse”

~ “I mean, if it’s not too much trouble” “no no it’s fine”

~ *Loki bitch-slapping the guard in the face with the scepter*

~ *cap punches Loki and Loki’s bitch really face”

~ “Kneel!” “Not today!”

~ “Make a move Reindeer Games”

~ “Rock of Ages giving up so easy?”

~ “What’s the matter? Scared of a little lightning?” “I’m not overly fond of what follows?” *?????*

~ “Now there’s that guy”

~ “We need a plan of attack!” “I have a plan. Attack”

~ “You think yourself above them?” “Well yes dumbass”

~ “You listen well brother” “I’m listening”

~ “Doth mother know, you weareth her drapes?”

~ *Loki calmly watching them fight*

~ “Power at 400% capacity” “How bout that?”

~ “Let me know if ‘real power’ wants a magazine or something”

~ “He really grows on you doesn’t he?”

~ “An army. From outer space” *should’ve stayed in the ice cube*

~ “He killed 80 people in 2 days” “He’s adopted”

~ “No hard feelings Point Breaks, you got a mean swing”

~ “That man is playing Galaga! Thought we wouldn’t notice but we did!” *they later show the guy playing Galaga*

~ “How does Fury see these?” “He turns.” “Sounds exhausting”

~ “When did you become an expert in thermonuclear astrophysics?” “Last night”

~ *Tony and Bruce geeking out over science*

~ “Are you nuts?” “Jury’s out”

~ “Is everything a joke to you?” “Funny thing”

~ *Tony supporting Bruce by offering blueberries*

~ “The Stark tower? That big ugly-” *Tony’s face* “building in the sky?”

~ “Followings not really my style?” “And you’re all about style?” “Of the people in this room who is 1) wear a spangly outfit and 2) not of use?”

~ *Ancient powerful deity trying to describe what a Bilgesnipe is to a mortal*

~ “How is this now about me?” “I’m sorry isn’t everything”

~ “Big man in a suit of armor. Take that off and what are you?” “Genius billionaire playboy philanthropist”

~ *Tony and Steve arguing* “Put on the suit” “I’m not afraid to hit an old man”

~ *SHIELD gets attacked* “Put on the suit” “Yep”

~ “Is the sun coming up? Then put it on the left dumbass”

~ “It seems to work on some form of electricity” *I should’ve stayed in the ice*

~ *Tony speaking Science TM* “Speak English!”

~ “Target angry! TARGET ANGRY!!!!!!”

~ “Are you ever not going to fall for that?”

~ *After blasting Loki* “So that’s what it does”

~ *Master assassins who bite each other*

~ *Thor vs Windows episode 2*

~ “Cap hit the lever” “I need a minute here!” “LEVER!!! NOW!!!”

~ “Uh oh I’m fucked”

~ “Are you an alien?” “No” “Well then son, you’ve got a condition”

~ “Hey you guys aren’t authorized to be in he-” “Son, just don’t”

~ “Please tell me you’re going to appeal to my humanity” “Actually I’m planning on threatening”

~ *Tony very calmly “threatening” Loki*

~ “I have an army” “We have a Hulk”

~ “This usually works” “Well performance issues. It’s not uncommon 1 out of 5-” YEET

~ “And there one other person you pissed off. His name is Phil”

~ “Right. Army”

~ *Steve trying to stay safe in the jet as it falls to the ground* *I SHOULD’VE STAYED IN THE FUCKING ICE*

~ “Stark are you seeing this?” “Seeing. Still working on believing”

~ “You think you can hold them off?” “Captain, it would be my genuine pleasure”

~ “Just like Budapest all over again” “You and I remember Budapest very differently”

~ “Why the hell should I take orders from you?” *Cause I’m a fucking badass that why*

~ “Welp. We got his attention. What the hell is step 2?”

~ “So. This all seems horrible”

~ “I’m bringing the party to you” “I don’t see how that’s a party”

~ “That’s my secret cap. I’m always angry” *honestly tho Mood TM*

~ “Better clench up Legolas”

~ “And Hulk. Smash”

~ *Hawkeye not looking where he’s shooting and still hitting his mark*

~ “Well Thor’s taking down a squadron on 6th” “And he didn’t invite me”

~ *Hulk punching Thor out of the frame*

~ *Steve hiding his whole body behind his shield*

~ “I recognize that the council has made a decision but given that it’s a stupid ass decision I have elected to ignore it”

~ “Nat what the fuck are you doing?”

~ *Loki catches the arrow like a Badass TM but it still blows up in his face anyways cause Hawkeye is also a Badass TM*

~ “I am a god you dull creature and I will not be bullied by a-“ *gets smacked around like a rag doll*

~ “Puny god”

~ *Moans* (NOT LIKE THAT GET Y’ALL’S HEADS OUTTA THE GUTTER!!)

~ “Jarvis. You ever hear the tale of Jonah?” “I wouldn’t consider him a role model”

~ *ITS SHWARMA!!!! In the back ground!*

~ “You ready for another bout?” “What you gettin sleepy?”

~ *Hulk roaring to wake up Tony* “What the hell?”

~ “What just happened? Please tell me nobody kissed me!”

~ “Lets just not come in tomorrow. Let’s just take a day. You ever tried shwarma? There’s a shwarma place three blocks away. I don’t know what it is but I wanna try it.”

~ “If it’s all the same to you, I’ll have that drink now” *Tony smirking*

~ “Superhero’s in New York? Give me a break!”

~ *The Shwarma scene*

~ *Tony realizing he was scared back to life by the man on his left*

~ *Steve nodding off like the senior citizen he is*

~ *Thor eating literally everything on his plate*

~ *Clint and Natasha taking up each others personal space*

Alright some side thoughts. First of all, there’s no humor in the opening scene when Loki is stealing the Tesseract. I find this interesting as I see no reason for there not to be humor. Not complaining, just wondering.

Also, just like with Thor 1 & 2, there’s little to no humor when Thor and Loki are arguing. Whether it’s wen Thor breaks Loki out fo the jet after Stuttgart or when Thor and Loki are fighting on the Stark Tower, there’s barely any humor, if there’s even any humor at all.

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mrsrhys23 · 4 years

Text

Avengers prompt list

I’m bored so I made this...

Steve Rogers (Captain America)

Language!

“I’m not looking for forgiveness, and I’m way past asking for permission.”

“So your body’s changing. Believe me, I know how that feels.”

“That is America’s ass.”

“Is this a test?”

“I can do this all day.”

“I am (name)

“I don’t want to kill anyone. I don’t like bullies; I don’t care where they’re from.”

“On your left.”

“Before we get started, does anyone want to get out?”

“‘Cause I’m with you ’til the end of the line.”

Bucky Barnes (The winter soldier)

“I Thought You Were Smaller."

"I'm With You 'Til The End Of The Line, Pal."

"You're My Mission."

"That Little Guy From (place) Who Was Too Dumb To Run Away From A Fight, I'm Following Him."

Natasha Romanoff (black widow)

"I only ACT like I know everything."

"I'm multitasking."

"Let me put you on hold."

"The person who developed this is slightly smarter than me. Slightly."

"I'm sorry. Did I step on your moment?"

"I blew all my covers. I gotta go figure out a new one."

"Nothing lasts forever."

"He's also a huge dork. Chicks dig that!"

"Bye bye, bikinis"

Thor Odison

“THIS DRINK, I LIKE IT! ANOTHER!”

“You people are so petty. And tiny.”

“I choose to run toward my problems and not away from them..” I

“Do I look to be in a gaming mood?

“HE’S A FRIEND FROM WORK!”

“I notice you’ve copied my beard.”

Peter quill (Star-lord)

I Look Around And You Know What I See? Losers!

Don’t Call Us Plucky. We Don’t Know What It Means

Sometimes The Thing You're Searching For Your Whole Life Is Right There By Your Side All Along

What Should We Do Next? Something Good, Something Bad? Bit Of Both?

I Don't Learn. It's One Of My Issues

It's Showtime A-Holes!

Okay, I'm Gonna Get A Bowflex. I'm Gonna Commit. I'm Gonna Get Some Dumbbells

Let's Talk About This Plan Of Yours. I Think It's Good, Except It Sucks

Drax the destroyer

I've mastered the ability of standing so incredibly still, that I become invisible to the eye. Watch.

You just need to find a woman who is pathetic, like you.

He is not a dude. You're a dude. This is a man. A handsome, muscular man.

Well I wasn't listening then, I was thinking of something else...

She just told everyone your deepest, darkest secret!

No one talks to my friends like that.

Vision

Yes. But a thing isn't beautiful because it lasts. It's a privilege to be among them.

Well... I was born yesterday.

I suppose we are both disappointments.

It's terribly well balanced.

I wish to understand it. The more I do, the less it controls me. One day, who knows? I may even control it.

It's as I said. Catastrophe.

That's true. He hates you the most.

It's alright. I love you.

Tony stark (Iron man)

"Sometimes you gotta run before you walk."

“Is it better to be feared or respected? I say, is it too much to ask for both?"

"Let's face it, this is not the worst thing you've caught me doing."

"Give me a scotch. I'm starving."

“…Just like that.”

"Doth mother know you weareth her drapes?"

"Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist."

. "Well, performance issues, it's not uncommon. One out of five..."

"Have you ever tried shawarma? There’s a shawarma joint about two blocks from here. I don’t know what it is but i wanna try it.”

. "No. You're in a relationship with me. Everything will never be okay."

"Don't do anything I would do, and definitely don't do anything I wouldn't do..."

Morgan Stark

I love you, 3000.”

Pepper pots

I don't think you could tie your shoes without me.

I do anything and everything (name) requires. Including occasionally taking out the trash. Will that be all?

You're all I have too, you know.

Oh, no, I always forget to wear deodorant and dance with my boss in a room full of people I work with in a dress with no back.

Tears of joy. I hate job hunting.

I am trying to do the job that you were meant to do.

Oh my god... that was really violent...

Don't ever, ever, ever, ask me to do anything like that, ever again!

Stephen Strange (Doctor Strange)

Pain's an old friend.

We're in the endgame now.

(name), there was no other way.

Unlike everyone else in your life, I don't work for you.

Study and practice. Years of it.

It's what made me a great doctor.

Nick Fury

I recognise the council has made a decision, but given that it's a stupid-ass decision, I've elected to ignore it.

I still believe in heroes.

You got gifts, (name) , but we have a job to do. Are you going to step up or not?

Clint Barton (Hawkeye)

"You And I Remember Budapest Very Differently."

I've Done The Whole Mind Control Thing. Not A Fan.

"We've Come A Long Way Since Budapest."

Loki

“If it's all the same to you, I'll have that drink now."

“There are no men like me.”

"I am the monster parents tell their children about at night."

Wanda Maximoff (Scarlet witch)

Everybody’s afraid of something.

I've caused enough problems.

“You took everything from me.” “ I don't even know who you are.” “You will.”

Sometimes it's hard, but sooner or later every man shows himself.

You guys know I can move things with my mind, right?

Bruce Banner (Hulk)

That's my secret, (name) : I'm always angry.

You know, sometimes exactly what I want to hear isn't exactly what I want to hear.

What? I see this as an absolute win.

Sorry kids. You don't get to see my party trick after all.

I’ve got a compelling reason not to lose my cool.

Broke up? Like a band? Like the Beatles?

I don't think we should be focusing on (name). That guy's brain is a bag full of cats. You can smell crazy on him.

Thanos

The hardest choices require the strongest wills.

Perfectly balanced, as all things should be

I do. You're not the only one cursed with knowledge.

You should have gone for the head.

You should choose your words more carefully.

The end is near.

I am Inevitable!

Rocket Raccoon

No, seriously, I need it! (snickering) It's important to me...

You just wanna suck the joy out of everything.

Who hasn't been to space? You better not throw up on my ship.

See, this is exactly why none of you have any friends!

Can you believe they call us criminals when he's assaulting us with that haircut?

You're! Making! Me! Beat! Up! Grass!

Quit smiling, ya idiot, you're supposed to be professional.

Peter Parker (Spider-man)

This is nice.

Yes sir. I'm sorry. I understand. I just wanted to be like you

What? No, no, no, I don't wanna kill anybody!

It's not a onesie.

Hey guys, you ever see that really old movie, Empire Strikes Back?

Look, when you can do the things that I can, but you don't, and then the bad things happen, they happen because of you.

That's uh, that's all on YouTube though, right? I mean that's where you found it. 'Cause you know that's all fake. It's all done on a computer.

This is my chance to prove myself.

#marvel prompts #tony stark #steve rogers #natasha romanoff #bruce banner #thor odison #clint barton #stephen strange #bucky barnes #peter parker

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