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pure-oddity · 4 months

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Illusion of choice

Serial killer!Simon Riley x reader

(Warnings: death mention and Simon's lack of care for said death. Implied drink tampering. Simon is a little intense. (Let me know if more are needed). Reader sees red flags and promptly ignores them.)

(This isn't like chapter one or anything it's just a snapshot of something that went down in this universe) not proofread, you know the drill

"You love that you gave Simon a chance and became his friend. He's become one of the most important people in your life. So when you ignore the bad feeling you get around him sometimes, you just hope it won't come back to bite you (it will. He will too)"

“Tony Swalts, you don't go near him. He haunts the alley next to the pub. Every Thursday, like clockwork. Always looks like he just came in from the rain.” Simon says, takes a sip of water, and continues eating.

You look up mid chew and eye the man across from you.

He's maskless, hardly ever wears it around you anymore. You watch as his scarred jaw moves, chewing into the meat - deer you think? You stopped asking what it was, he's never fed you less than the best so why bother worrying.(you feel bad for worrying, but sometimes, sometimes-)

His eyes, dark and empty, stare at his plate. He's a dispassionate eater save for the few hums of contentment you get on a particularly good meal. Nowadays, he lets you help make the meals - will even indulge you and try any new recipes you find online.

He's fine with you seasoning and marinating, less so when it comes to cutting and handling hot items. ‘leave the knife work to me lamb, best that way’ he says ‘no use burning yourself, give me the pot’ he urges. You think it's his nice way of calling you a hazard.

(You don't bother trying to correct him, he gives you that stupid look - his ‘lieutenant stare’ is what you call it. You crumble under it quickly, like you imagine any of his subordinates had.)

You nudge a bit of pea around your plate.

Open your mouth to speak.

Go back to the pea.

Roll your shoulders and feel your mouth form around the first syllable.

Back to the pea again.

You nudge too hard and it smears a baby barf green against the white ceramic of the plate.

“Wh-why? I. I mean I'm not looking to make any new friends or, anything. But…why?” You pick a new non smashed pea to toy with, eyes downcast.

Your leg twitches when you hear his fork gently clack against the wood of his table.

You feel the lieutenant stare, you ignore it - but you feel your face heat up under the weight of his gaze.

He doesn't get. Mad. At Least not at you. You know that, but you brace for it anyway. It's just what you're used to. He's mumbled about breaking you of that habit a few times, like you're some unruly puppy with an interest in chewing furniture.

“Don't. Think I should get into it. It'll do more harm than good. Smells like fish , if you really need a reason to avoid him.” His vague answer is what does more harm than good, now more curious and nervous than ever. But you will keep the fish thing in mind, your nose is sensitive.

“Well. Uhm. Thats not great to hear. I'm actually more worried than I was before I asked.” You accidentally smush another pea. “Shoulda just kept my mouth shut…” you mumble. You've eaten enough, more than enough you think - you're about to ask him for a Tupperware when he speaks again.

You're expecting this to be the end of the conversation. But he surprises you by elaborating, “Some birds have had….less than nice things to say about him. And he has done….less than nice things to them and anything he can Leer over.” he grabs a napkin, sets it near you, grabs another and wipes his face clean. “Don't want him thinking you're next.” he tacks on.

You mirror him gently, making sure to get your fingers too.

“Just. Keep away from him, yea? Not like it'll be hard. Fucker like him? He's bound to get what's coming to him.” He assures.

He rises with his plate, and you go to do the same but he presses you down by your shoulder.

“Few more bites, you skipped breakfast - you did, I know you did - hardly ate any of dinner, too busy playing with it. “

he squeezes your shoulder, gives a quick rub to your back, and then goes to place his dishes in the sink. You shovel a few quick spoonfuls of pea into your mouth, washing them down with a gulp of water. Your stomach turns but he is right about having skipped breakfast. You don't dwell on how he knows, just accept that he does.

You remember that Tony spoke to you once, just once. The conversation ended just as quick as it began when Simon slunk up behind you. You didn't look back as you were shepherded into the pub that night. Wonder if there was a wordless exchange that you would have caught if you did.

You wonder if Simon forgot that night. You don't think so. He's got a good memory when it comes to you (it doesn't unnerve you so much anymore, how he knows you. it doesn't bother you. It doesn't-)

“Right. You're lookin about as green as the peas, c'mere. I'll pack it away for later love.” He beckons with a hand and you dutifully follow, eager to be done having lost your appetite.

You watch as he roots through his cabinets and fishes out a container. The food is packed neatly inside and placed in the fridge, and he joins your dishes with his in the sink.

He stops your move at washing them by gesturing towards a stool nearby.

“You know the routine. I wash you dry, man your station.”

You snort, imagine him saying that in battle. Sounds silly to you, but you're sure in the moment you'd take it seriously - assuming you weren't trying to run off from the firefight.

Up the stool you hop, dry rag in hand, while Simon washes. The water is steaming, whisps of evaporated water curling around his reddening hands and wrists. Says it's better for sanitization- just not for the hands, you remind him. He's lucky you're invested in him, you keep a bottle of hand lotion in every room. He won't use it himself, but stays still while you rub it into cracked knuckles and callus ridden palms.

He's quick with the dishes, and to tease him a bit you make a show of inspecting for missed spots - you don't find any. He chuffs at you, the weird breath laugh that he does.

“Mean it though, lamb. Keep away from him.” He reminds, disregarding the pleasant mood you had painstakingly created.

You set the dish down with a touch more force than necessary and his brow twitches. You mutter a half assed “my bad” and avoid his eye.

“Lamb.”

It's not like you want to see this guy, really. You do plan on avoiding him but. But you can't just let Simon dictate these things. You're an adult capable of making your own choices, youre the one in control of your own life , you- hearing your name stops your train of thought.. He says your name in a way that snuffs out your rebellious spark. Hardly ever uses your name, only when he's serious.

There have been times when you responded to ‘lamb’ faster than you had your own name, it's so foreign to you.

“I. I won't. I won't go near him, okay? It's not like I want to talk to some sleazeball anyway.” You concede, fight leaving you.

He's behind you faster than you can process, boxing you in between the counter and his solid mass.

“....m'not actin like this for no reason. Keepin you safe, lamb. Always keeping you safe. It's my job now, not asking for permission and I wont. You're my one good thing, my lamb, my…friend”

He says friend like that sometimes. Not in a way that makes you think he views you as less than a friend. But makes you feel like he sees you as more.

You don't broach the subject. Neither does he. You don't like change and he knows that (you also feel like running from him would be easier if you're just a friend, not that you need to run - it's just a precaution).

“I know. I know, Simon. I just…I don't like when you decide things for me sometimes.” You admit, hesitantly.

A beat of silence goes by and you feel the need to backtrack rise through you. You have a few appeasing lies brewing when he hums thoughtfully.

“Mm….even when it's easier? Just letting me decide?” He asks, his voice deeper somehow- accent thickening somehow, as he draws closer. If you took a deep enough breath your back would touch his chest.

You keep your breathing controlled, shiver, and nod. “Even when it's easier…I- I should still be the one to choose. For the most part…unless I ask you.” (but oh isn't it tempting, the thought of just letting someone else take over and-)

He sighs. And from the corner of your eye you watch as he nods. Nods again. And then like writhing snakes his arms slither back and away, he takes a few audible steps back(audible for your comfort) and leans against the kitchen island, arms now crossed.

“Alright, lamb. What do you want to do about the Swalt situation?”

As pushy, and overbearing, and all encompassing Simon and his attention is, even when he makes you feel like you're drowning - the moments of consideration he shows you keep you hooked to his side.

“I…..I don't want to be near him. And I don't want him near me…Especially not with that smell.” You decide, resolute and feeling just that much better expressing some control over your life.

“Done and done, lamb. We'll keep you outta his sight and mind. Let his luck run out, I'm sure he'll get what's coming to him.”

The last part…feels like a promise. A thinly veiled threat. It makes your stomach curdle at the thought, and you focus on lightening the mood (undigested pea won't taste, feel, or look nice coming back up).

“So soldier boy, Intel says you haven't seen the hobbit series yet - that's a crime. I could have you arrested, you know?”

He snorts. “Yea? You gonna cuff me, officer?”

“Not officer.” Your correct him “judge, jury and executioner. And as such I sentence you to ‘watch the first movie with me’. While serving hard time you're also tasked with making popcorn.”

“Could I ask the oh so supreme authority to grab some throw blankets? I have evidence to suggest one of the parties involved gets cold real easy.”

You sniff indignantly. He's just a space heater, you're the normal one. But, “ a reasonable request, consider it granted.” he loves keeping his flat cold.

You watch the movie together, he doesn't mind that you make little jokes here and there - he even joins in a few times.

And he likes it! That's what he tells you at least. And you think you've gotten better at reading him, so you're pretty sure he means it.

He lets you prattle on about the movie. You let him curl you into his blanket, tucking you into his side. He makes a comment here and there. Offers praise in regards to certain scenes and questions others. You talk into the night, forget about swalt, forget about all the tension, forget that you're supposed to drive home.

It's late now. And you're far too tired to drive, he reminds you that this isn't the first time you've slept over.

even has a set of his clothes ready for you.

—--------

It takes two nights for people to realize Tony Swalts was missing. 3 more for his body to be found and the story to hit the news.

‘Another soul stolen by the infamous Reaper’ is what the news is headlined as.

“Told you so” he says, smug (almost…proud?) As the newscaster goes over the details. “His luck ran out, took a risky gamble and lost. Good riddance”

“Y-yeah, you called it…a guy like him was uh. Bound to end up like this, eventually” you murmur in nervous agreement. You're sat next to him on the couch while the segment airs. He's got his arm thrown against the back of the couch. His fingers gently play with pieces of your hair.

You don't listen to the broadcast, not concerned with the details. You know it's gruesome, know that he died screaming - terrified beyond belief and in pain.

You know that Simon really shouldn't be so happy at the news. Relieved maybe, but happy? You'd understand happiness from the perspective of anyone Swalts wronged but - you see Simon's shoulders shake as he quietly laughs- but you know this can't be a normal reaction.

You also know that you were with Simon around the time of death, shared a bed at his instance (co-sleeping helps keep him asleep longer, he says). Woke up next to him and everything. Know that you got up in the middle of the night for water, only to have him go get up and pour you a cup himself. He has an alibi. You are his alibi. There would be no way for him to have done something like that and hide it so well.

This internal battle never seems to stop. Torn between what is real and provable and what your intuition tells you is happening.

You've been in his house, you've seen every room, checked every crevice. Nothing. It's Simon. Your Simon. Your friend for fucks sake. Sure he's a bit rough around the edges but he's a good person. You know him, you think. You really truly think you do. Know what he likes, what he doesn't. Gotten better at knowing what he's feeling or thinking.

You know all these things. You know it's not him.

But you just don't know why he looks so…

satisfied.

You keep quiet ultimately. Remind yourself that he is your friend. And that he's been accused of being this horrible killer before, worked to show and prove his innocence in court- was even attacked by the real killer and just barely survived!

And as he plays with your hair and switches over to the movie he let you pick out you settle deeper into his side. He let you pick on his night, cause he ‘wanted you to pick something that made you happy’. Why would a monster be sweet? Considerate? Why would he feed and experience life with you? Laugh, and joke, and smile with you?

You don't know. Maybe you don't want to know. Maybe it's better that way.

#odd stories #simon ghost riley #butcher/slasher au #simon riley x reader #i was in the mood for internal emotional conflict

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writers-potion · 9 days

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Writing Mad Characters

Okay this is a bit awkward because I had this question copypasted into Google Docs I use to draft my answers, and I realized I've lost the question in my inbox (which is being flooded).

So...I'm so sorry for whoever asked this question. Sorry for the delay because I was struggling with life in general for the past month and definitely SORRY for losing your question (－‸ლ)

Q: I'm writing a story where a major character is slowly spiraling into madness where small details kinda hint into the downfall right before the bigger details appear and then it the floodgates open. Is there anything I should avoid? Anything that I should keep in mind? Anything that I should research?

Things to Avoid

“Mad” or “Insane” is too general. Writing a cliched ‘crazy’ character who randomly talks to imaginary people and lashes out at strangers, you’ll offend a whole bunch of people who've gone through/have mental illnesses. Read up on existing mental conditions (schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, post-traumatic disorder and borderline personality disorder, etc.) to see what your character might have.

Words like “mad” “crazy” or “insane” aren’t enough when you’re describing their status. As mentioned, these words hardly mean much when it comes to providing a clear description.

Contradicting yourself. Throwing random unhinged symptoms here and there wouldn’t work. In fact, you must have a clear arc on which they’re traveling and ensure that your “hints” are all getting at something.

Making the character overly destructive or harmful to others (when nothing really justifies it)

Justifying damaging behavior with this “madness”. Mad or not, your character will still have motives and goals that drive them forward.

Making them look incompetent just the fact that they have a mental condition that makes them appear “mad” to others shouldn’t prevent them from achieving success. In fact, they may be even more cool-hearted and logical when it comes to their obsessions/goals.

Research Tips

Narrow down the mental conditions your character experiences. Even if it’s a fictional condition, try basing it on existing ones and building on top of them.

Take some time to study characters and/or real clinical cases that resemble the kind of madness you’re going for.

- Anxiety Disorders: excessive fear and dread (ex. phobias) - Mood Disorders: persistent swings in mood or persistent feelings that interfere with daily life (ex. Depression, bipolar) - Psychotic Disorders: disordered thinking (ex. schizophrenia) - Eating Disorders: extreme emotional attitudes toward food (ex. Bulimia, anorexia) - Impulse Disorders: unable to resist urges (ex. Kleptomania, pyromania, gambling) - Personality Disorders: extreme inflexible personality traits (ex. Anti-social disorder, OCPD) - Past Traumatic Stress: persistent, frightening memories leading to emotional numbness

Does your character have empathy?

A sociopathic kind of madness is different.

General Writing Tips for Spiraling into Madness

Establish a Baseline

A lot of factors (stress, family history, innate personality, trauma, etc.) can contribute to madness, but it is not going to happen in a week. Define the existing mental and physical conditions your character has, and start from there.

If you’re aiming for suicidal tendencies at the end, you want to start with symptoms of depression (a condition that may lead to suicide) - growing apathetic, erratic sleeping patterns, irritability, etc.

This is also the stage where you want to plant some triggers that’ll go off later.

Trigger Events

A perfectly sound character suddenly spiraling down the madness route due to a single accident or traumatizing event isn’t convincing.

A madness “snap” denies the reader the experience of watching the character’s journey into madness and how they feel about it.

Internal Conflict (antagonist in himself)

You must remember that madness is incurable. If someone could “cure” themselves by eating healthy, exercising and taking a few pills, it wouldn’t be much of a madness, would it? This means that the worst antagonist is going to be the character themselves, or the part of them that’s been taken away.

Show how they are frustrated with themselves, scared of themselves, angry at their “alternative self”. The experience of not knowing yourself is a whole journey of its own.

Physical Manifestations/Quirks

If your character has a routine, show how they break down.

They might develop habits that they otherwise would never allow themselves to have, perhaps as an effort to “keep this madness out”

Deteriorating Relationships

Depict how the character’s madness impacts his closed/loved ones. In the earlier stages, those close to him might be faster to notice and accept the signs of madness, even if the character denies it him/herself.

The first signs of madness might show when the character is trying to deal with difficult relationships - like losing patience and being unable to pick up subtle social clues.

Choosing Obsessions Over Primal Urges

For these characters, obsession can take over a person’s normal urge to eat, sleep or even live. This can lead to, more or less, suicide.

Example: In Black Swan, Nina’s obsession with becoming the perfect ballerina drive her to insanity, to the point where she doesn't mind dying on stage for the show.

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cupidlovesastro · 6 months

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𝑠𝑢𝑛 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑗𝑢𝑛𝑐𝑡 𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑛𝑒𝑡𝑠

sun ☌ moon- people with this placement are tuned with their emotions, and may often identify with their emotions. for example, when they are happy they might say they’re just a happy person. they are also lead by their heart and their personality could bring peace, happiness, and comfort to others. they could also be seen the parental figure of their group, and if they are a parent

sun ☌ mercury- people with this placement could be very good at describing their personality and could know exactly who they are, what they want, their beliefs, etc. these individuals could also have a voice that’s powerful and demands attention. they are also could be fast speakers and quick with comebacks. they may also be curious to find out more ways to express theirself or introspect

sun ☌ venus- these people are lovers at heart. when in a relationship they may identify with their lover often, or say that them and their partner are like one. these people also love dressing up and looking good. they could hate when they feel inner conflicts. their personality may also have many feminine qualities, and they could appear very confident and a ball of light to others. there’s also opportunities for this native to be popular and an artist of some sort

sun ☌ mars- people with this placement are a ball of energy. they could be highly active people and they could also have an intense presence. they may be intimidating to others as well. i could also see that someone with this placement feels strongly about their identity and personality. they could have a very masculine energy or personality traits. they are go getters, and don’t like wasting their time. they don’t struggle to make up their mind, they just know what they strive for

sun ☌ jupiter- these individuals have a big personality, and may be immature in their younger years but show lots of growth and improvement over time. they could also have a very healing personality and they’re the type of person who makes you want to change yourself for the better. this person could also have traits that are rare and considered lucky to have. they quite curious about the world and all that is out there for them to discover. their level of optimism keeps them and others in a positive and cheery mood, they are charmers

sun ☌ saturn- there could be some for of discipline on this individuals personality. they could take things seriously, and they may try not to show their true self to others. they could also often identify their self with being a very responsible person, and so could others. they have much drive, and are assertive and ambitious natives. they could seem aloof, cold, and distant to others, although they may not do this intentionally

sun ☌ uranus- their way about going about life could seem creative and unique than others. they also have a deep care for the world around them. their identity may also seem rebellious to societies norms and social standards. also change traits a lot , wether this be intentional or unintentional. they are also creators and idea people, in the sense that they have many ideas. they’re also good at showing that they care for others

sun ☌ neptune- these people are empathetic through and through. they are quite good at expressing that they care and have much compassion. they could also be mysterious, and not much is known about these individuals. they are highly intuitive people though, and may sense when others aren’t being truthful about their identity. their personality could be seen as ideal though, in the sense that they could be the type of people that others day dream/ dream of being

sun ☌ pluto- their personality could change quite a bit over time, so to internal transitions and transformations they experience. people with this aspect could also have karma surrounding their identity, or their karma could be brought to light due to this aspect. others could view these individuals as mysterious, secretive, intuitive, and spiritual

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hayatheauthor · 1 month

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Crafting Sad Scenes: Writing Tears and Emotional Depth

Creating authentic emotions is vital for immersive storytelling, which is why I decided to make this series on how to write different emotions. After exploring rage, it's now time to delve into sadness!

When it comes to portraying sadness, delving into various aspects of your character's behaviour and environment can deepen the emotional impact. Here's a guide on how to evoke sadness in your writing using different elements:

Facial Expressions

Downcast Eyes and Furrowed Brow: Describe how their eyes lower and brows crease, reflecting inner sorrow or distress.

Quivering Lips or Trembling Chin: Note the subtle quivers in their lips or chin, indicating emotional vulnerability or the effort to hold back tears.

Pained or Distant Gaze: Highlight a gaze that's distant, unfocused, or filled with inner turmoil, showing their emotional detachment or deep sadness.

Tear-Streaked or Reddened Eyes: Mention tear tracks or reddened eyes, portraying recent or suppressed crying, enhancing the visual impact of their sadness.

Hollow Cheeks and Sunken Eyes: Describe physical changes like hollow cheeks or sunken eyes, reflecting fatigue, despair, or prolonged emotional distress.

Body Language and Gestures

Slumped Shoulders and Hunched Posture: Show their dejected stance with slumped shoulders and a hunched posture, conveying a sense of heaviness or defeat.

Fidgeting or Clasping Hands: Detail how they fidget nervously or clasp their hands tightly, indicating inner turmoil or a need for comfort.

Absentminded Touching of Face or Hair: Mention absentminded gestures like touching their face or running fingers through their hair, reflecting introspection or sadness.

Slow or Listless Movements: Describe their movements as slow, lethargic, or lacking energy, mirroring their emotional state of sadness.

Avoiding Eye Contact or Retreating: Highlight how they avoid eye contact or retreat from interactions, seeking solitude or trying to mask their emotions.

Dialogue and Inner Monologue

Subdued or Monotone Speech: Show their dialogue as subdued, with a monotone delivery or pauses, conveying emotional restraint or inner pain.

Expressing Regret, Loss, or Longing: Use dialogue to express their regrets, sense of loss, or longing for something or someone, adding depth to their sadness.

Internal Conflicts and Self-Reflection: Delve into their inner monologue, revealing their conflicts, doubts, or self-reflection, showcasing the complexity of their emotional journey.

Using Metaphors or Symbolic Language: Incorporate metaphors or symbolic language in their dialogue or thoughts, enhancing the poetic or introspective nature of their sadness.

Environmental Cues and Setting

Bleak or Desolate Settings: Set scenes in bleak or desolate environments, such as abandoned places or dimly lit spaces, amplifying the sense of isolation or melancholy.

Rainy Weather or Gray Skies: Describe rainy weather, gray skies, or somber atmospheres, mirroring their emotional state and adding a reflective tone to the setting.

Diminished Colors or Lack of Vibrancy: Use descriptions of muted colors or a lack of vibrancy in the surroundings, reflecting the character's subdued mood and emotional depth.

Actions and Reactions

Withdrawing from Interactions: Show them withdrawing from social interactions, seeking solitude, or avoiding activities they once enjoyed, highlighting their emotional withdrawal.

Seeking Comfort Objects or Routines: Describe how they turn to comfort objects or routines, such as listening to music, writing, or engaging in familiar activities, as coping mechanisms.

Emotional Outbursts or Sudden Changes: Portray occasional emotional outbursts, sudden changes in behavior, or moments of vulnerability, revealing layers of their sadness.

Impact on Relationships and Interactions: Explore how their sadness affects their relationships and interactions with others, showcasing the dynamics of empathy, support, or misunderstanding.

Types of Tears and Emotional Triggers

Watery Eyes: These tears often accompany moments of deep emotional pain, such as hearing hurtful words, experiencing profound disappointment, or feeling overwhelmed by sadness. Characters may blink rapidly or struggle to maintain eye contact as tears well up, indicating their struggle to contain their emotions.

Quiet Tears: Quiet tears are silent and discreet, often shed in moments of solitude or introspection. They may occur when a character reflects on past memories, grapples with internal conflicts, or experiences a poignant realization. These tears are a subtle yet powerful expression of inner turmoil.

Full-On Sobs: Full-on sobs involve audible crying, heaving breaths, and visible emotional distress. They typically arise from intense grief, loss, physical pain, or overwhelming stress. Characters may find it challenging to speak coherently or control their emotions during such outbursts, revealing the depth of their emotional turmoil.

Tears of Joy: Tears of joy occur in moments of immense happiness, relief, or heartfelt connection. They often accompany scenes of reunions, achievements, or profound expressions of love and gratitude. These tears symbolize emotional release and the overwhelming experience of positive emotions.

Tears of Empathy: Characters may shed tears of empathy when witnessing others' suffering or hearing poignant stories. These tears reflect their compassion, sensitivity, and ability to deeply connect with the emotions of others, adding layers of empathy to their characterization.

Writing Prompts and Exercises

Write a scene where your character experiences a sudden wave of sadness in a public setting, struggling to conceal their emotions.

Craft a dialogue between two characters, one trying to comfort the other who is deeply saddened by a personal loss or disappointment.

Describe a setting that reflects the mood of sadness, using sensory details to evoke emotions and create atmosphere.

Explore a character's inner monologue as they reflect on past regrets or missed opportunities, expressing their profound sense of sadness.

Create a symbolic object or motif in your story that represents your character's journey through sadness, using it as a recurring theme for emotional depth.

Incorporating these elements can enrich your narrative and evoke powerful emotions in your readers, fostering a deeper connection to your characters and their emotional journeys.

Looking For More Writing Tips And Tricks?

Are you an author looking for writing tips and tricks to better your manuscript? Or do you want to learn about how to get a literary agent, get published and properly market your book? Consider checking out the rest of Haya’s book blog where I post writing and publishing tips for authors every Monday and Thursday! And don’t forget to head over to my TikTok and Instagram profiles @hayatheauthor to learn more about my WIP and writing journey!

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inkpot909 · 7 months

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Jealousy Headcanons: Duwang Gang

↳ Characters included are Josuke Higashikata, Okuyasu Nijimura, Koichi Hirose, and Rohan Kishibe. Gender neutral Reader with they/them pronouns. Hinted to take place after the death of Yoshikage Kira.

A/n: What a beautiful duwang! Real talk, I’ve been wanting to write a headcanon list for this group for a long time, now. Bless these boys, none of them (except for Koichi) know what they’re doing. I really hope y’all enjoy. <3

Warning(s): Canon-typical violence and swearing.

Josuke Higashikata

-> The Silent

The immediate feeling that washes over Josuke after realizing he’s become jealous is guilt.

If he has the luxury of being alone, he’ll pace around his bedroom while entertaining a lengthy argument with himself. It takes everything in him not to raise a hand up to his mouth and press a nail or two between clenched teeth. There’s a game of tug of war occurring inside his head and he’s nothing if not a slave to fully investing himself in the conflict.

If he isn’t alone, and especially if he’s with you, there is seemingly no dent made in his chill persona. Not a single person around him would be able to tell the internal conflict running through his mind. Not even you.

His usually relaxed thoughts are disrupted with an ocean of insecurity. “What if” questions plaguing him and internally souring his mood.

It’s a foreign feeling for him to experience. Especially considering you tend to bring out a very proud side of his personality. Ever since he started going out with you, everyday life has only gotten brighter.

And although he’d never be caught mentioning it out loud, there’s a part of him that’s mindful of the fact that usually he’s the one others grow jealous of.

He’s running in mental circles, a back and forth. Agonizing over just the idea of being jealous between taking the brunt of his emotions all at once.

All while he says absolutely nothing on the matter.

He may end up distancing himself for a day or two depending on just how lost in his own head he gets. He doesn’t seek out your company, and that’ll be the only telltale sign of how he’s truly feeling.

Even then, whenever you do see him, nothing appears to be wrong. He’ll smile at you all the same. His tone is cheerful as ever, and there’s no falter present in his laugh.

Because he can’t help but be ashamed for feeling this way, he’ll do anything in his power to make sure you don’t notice. He’ll continue to play the part of your never bothered, always cheery boyfriend.

He will only bring up his dilemma to Koichi.

Being involved in a relationship himself, Josuke figures he would best understand his point of view. He does his best to hear him out (he did go to him, after all), but Koichi telling him that it’s unhealthy to internalize how he’s feeling isn’t going to get Josuke to budge.

Josuke knows you’re loyal. He does trust you... so how could he possibly compromise that trust by mentioning something as silly as jealousy? Being open and honest is usually his go to. He tells you everything. But this...? There’s a little voice in his head telling him not to. And not even sound advice from a close friend can get him to stop listening.

If you’re observant enough to catch onto him avoiding you while simultaneously greeting you as if nothing’s wrong, bringing it up bluntly will finally force him to open his damn mouth.

He’s nervous; more nervous than he’s ever been around you in the past. It doesn’t take long before the word vomit starts pooling from his mouth, littered between a plethora of apologies. His eyes never meet yours until he’s done talking, hands continuously picking and pulling at one another.

Believe it or not, talking it through with you actually helps! Who knew? Certainly not Josuke.

After that first incident, dealing with his jealousy becomes a lot more manageable. Although it doesn’t happen often, it still does happen.

And he’s still not inclined to make a scene if he can help it.

Josuke’s opinion of guys who freak out on their partner or anyone who they feel threated by- even by the loosest stretch of the imagination -is very low. He will certainly talk to you about it, but in private and merely to express his emotions rather than to criticize you in any way.

The only real exception to this, is if someone’s actively hitting on you and repeatedly not taking the hint. How he approaches the situation largely depends on you.

If you’re not afraid of confrontation, he’s going to be at your side with a smug expression on his face the entire time. Your ability to stand up for yourself can make him melt on the spot. He lets you go at it, watching you with a smile brimming with puppy love. He just cannot help but fawn over how cool you are.

Once you’ve made your point, he’ll happily back you up lightheartedly. Even to the point of mocking the person who dared to ignore every “no” you threw their way. People like that deserve to get knocked down a peg, and Josuke’s eager to help.

If you’re more meek in approaching these situations, and tend to shoot Josuke glances pleading for his aid, he’s happy to help. It feeds into his ego a bit, honestly.

He’ll make a point to wrap an arm around you, throwing his best intimidating side-eye to the person daring to make you feel uncomfortable. Hell, he’ll even puff out his chest a little too.

Once again, he’s not above insulting them. His words are vicious and more than a little rude. He is a delinquent, after all.

Josuke isn’t a really fan of getting violent in these situations, though. The only reason he would get to that point is if the other person grows violent first and he needs to defend himself.

If they take it that far, they’re asking for it in his book. He doesn’t feel any need to use Crazy Diamond against something so trivial, more than a little confident in his own strength.

That said, if the flirtatious bastard is enough to make you really upset, he will use his stand to rearrange their appearance in an attempt to make you laugh. Yeah, it’s a bit twisted, but his youthful mischievousness is likely to earn him a smile from you.

That said, if someone flirts with you and tries to brush him off by dissing his hair- all cards are off the table. Openly flirting with you in front of him and dissing his hair? That person must have a death wish.

You may want to look away.

Okuyasu Nijimura

-> The Emotional

Unlike his best friend, Okuyasu wears his heart on his sleeve at all times.

Expressing emotions, even negative or embarassing ones, is not something he shies away from. No, not even in public.

When he first confessed his feelings to you, he was certainly more than a little shy. But when you gladly reciprocated, you’re positive the entirety of Morioh shook with his joyous response.

It’s because of this that Okuyasu experiencing jealousy is quite the roller-coaster of emotion. If he’s jealous, everyone and their mother will likely know.

His immediate response is confusion.

Not over how he’s feeling per se, but instead over what to do about it. Painfully aware of his own intellegence, he’ll agonize over how he should respond. Jealousy is rather complicated in his opinion, and his biggest concern is accidentally pushing you away via his reaction.

He is decisive, though, so it’s not something he’s going to mull it over for very long.

And if you’re right beside him, the likelihood of you diffusing his jealousy right in that very moment is quite high. So, although it’s not uncommon for him to be jealous, he’s quick to let it go.

In most cases, that’s where the story ends.

Sometimes, though, if the feeling is strong enough or if you’re not able to talk with him, it’ll go a bit further.

In those instances, the emotion that follows his confusion is anger. More accurately, it’s defensiveness masked with a display of frustration.

It’s written all over his face, eyebrows furrowing and eyes turning sharp. The delivery of his words are rather harsh and unfiltered (well, more than usual).

This anger won’t ever be directed at you, though. Okuyasu cares about you far too much.

If he can’t direct it at a specific individual that’s (according to him) the source of his jealousy, he’ll instead grow angry with himself. Mainly because his jealousy stems from an insecure belief that he’s not good enough for you.

If he gets this upset, it’s best to leave him to let out his frustrations before going to speak with him on the matter. Hell, Josuke is a better support for Okuyasu when he’s dealing with the bulk of his emotions.

Not much time is needed; no more than a day. And because he respects you greatly, if you give him that tiny- yet definitely needed -space, he’ll gladly hear you out with a fresher mindset.

Okuyasu is almost always going to be soothed by your affirmations.

Sweet words about how you’re with him because you want to be, and that nothing so small could form a wedge between the two of you, is very reassuring for him.

Jealousy is going to be more of a prevalent hurtle for the both of you to work on at the beginning of the relationship. He was still getting used to the idea that you really do like him as more than just a friend. It’s sweet, sure, but the insecurity is something the two of you work on together.

As time passes, and he digests the fact that you’re not going to leave him for the first person that flirtatiously glances your way, he cools off a lot. In fact, he starts having a hard time taking the people who hit on you seriously.

Namely, he’s going to laugh at any poor bastard trying to make a move on you. Because “Ha! Get a move on, loser! Can’t you see their taken?”

His mocking may not be as well-thought out as Josuke’s, but they can cut just as deep. And his delivery is almost always sure to bring a smile to your face. Okuyasu is always proud when he’s the cause of your glee.

That said, getting defensive is still a knee-jerk reaction at times. It only applies if someone doesn’t want to take “no” as an answer.

Doesn’t matter how capable you are in defending yourself, if someone pushes it, he’s quickly going to follow it up with threats. Partially out of affectionate protectiveness, and also in part because he likes to think of himself as your knight in shining armor.

He tries to be as suave as he can while threatening a stranger with a fist to the face. One second he’s throwing insults, the next he’s giving you a smile along with a cheeky wink.

As far as he’s concerned, someone messing with his boyfriend/girlfriend better be prepared for a pair of knuckles meeting harshly with their jaw.

Okuyasu’s like an angry dog barking loudly at anyone getting too close. Least you know no one will ever dare to mess with you for very long.

Koichi Hirose

-> The Logical

Out of everyone in the Duwang gang, Koichi is the least susceptible to jealousy. Actually, scratch that. He’s the least susceptible to jealousy in all of Morioh.

Especially after developing Echoes act 3, his thought process just doesn’t leave a lot of room for doubts in both you and himself.

If someone’s attempting to flirt with you, he’s more likely to grow annoyed rather than jealous.

He’ll throw them an unamused glance, eyebrow raised as if daring them to continue further. He’ll turn back to you, mentioning loudly enough for them to hear how obnoxious he finds their behavior to be. Returning the favor with a smile almost always does the trick, often prompting them to give up.

If they don’t, and press further, Koichi is prone to suggesting that the two of you go somewhere else. He never returns any animosity thrown towards him, not letting it get to him much. Yeah, they may be hurling low-hanging insults towards him, but he’s the one with you on his arm.

His casualness in those situations is so consistent to the point where Josuke and Okuyasu each comment on how they don’t understand it.

When a situation arises where they know they’d be jealous, the two just cannot wrap their head around how calm he is. Koichi merely laughs them off, almost finding their confusion to be amusing.

Koichi’s grown a lot, and he just can’t find it within himself to give into insecurities he considers unnecessary. All that, in his mind, should really be left in the past.

Adding to his confidence, is you yourself.

Koichi adores you, and would honestly trust you with his life. So why would he ever grow jealous of an old friend? What on earth could some random person at a party provide you in a short, two minute conversation that would warrant any defensiveness? Why would he feel threatened by a coworker? It’s not like he can tell you to avoid them.

In fact, he’s very aware of the fact that he can't tell you what to do in general. Or rather, he simply won’t. It’s not in his nature to be controlling or hover over you like that.

Not because you’ve brought it up or it's ever been an issue in the past. It’s simply because... that’s not a real relationship in his eyes. He’s not bossy or pushy- you started dating him because that was your decision at the end of the day. And that alone is enough proof to him that being jealous really isn’t worth it.

Now, if by some miracle he does grow jealous, it’s not going to last very long. Again, Koichi is just too levelheaded.

He is going to grow downcast, saddened by his own perspective of the situation. This is because he’ll only get to the point of jealousy if he believes you’ve returned someone’s advances- whether it was by word of mouth or something he saw with his own two eyes.

And because you care for him as earnestly as he does for you, his jealousy likely occurs due to an honest misunderstanding.

Koichi will approach you on the matter himself, and will do so calmly. Even if he saw something, he doesn’t want to become more upset before he hears what you have to say. After all, you’ve never disappointed him before.

Because of his strong trust in you, after he details his perspective on the matter, he asks that you explain your side of the situation to him.

Koichi’s demeanor is very controlled and polite, hiding a certain degree of genuine worry. He listens with baited breath, internally praying that he simply misread what happened.

And to his relief, that’s all it ever ends up being.

Just like that, the both of you are quickly back to normal. Worries evaporate from within his mind, and he’s back to his usual sweet self.

Genuinely the best boyfriend here, no contest.

Rohan Kishibe

-> The Denier

Oh, boy.

First thing’s first, it should be noted that The Great Rohan Kishibe does not grow jealous. It’s not even a question, and honestly, expecting him to explain such a thing is an insult. Men and women alike fawn over him; anyone would be lucky to have him. You’re lucky to have him.

And to his credit, Rohan really doesn’t grow jealous very often.

His confidence in himself may cross the line into narcissism, but it doesn’t lead him to give into jealousy very often.

Like Koichi, he knows that if you’re with him, it’s because you truly care. Even more so, considering Rohan knows (if only slightly) that he’s not the easiest person to be around.

Nope! He certainly doesn’t become jealous very often… not never, like he’s worked so hard to have you believe.

For Rohan to become jealous requires specific circumstances. Some random person approaching you at a party or bar isn’t going to pose much of a threat to his ego.

On the contrary, it feeds into his ego.

You’re a beautiful individual; it’s no question as to why others would try and approach you. But, of course, you always turn them away seeing as you’re already his.

In those instances, he’s as dismissive as Koichi, coupled with a tongue as sharp as Josuke’s. Rolling his eyes, wrapping an arm around you, straight up ignoring the person trying to talk to you, kissing you out of the blue- he’s got every weapon in his arsenal equipped to ensure you’re left alone.

If it gets to the point where you’re growing visibly nervous or uncomfortable, Rohan’s words are the nastiest you’ve ever seen. But the display isn’t necessarily out of jealousy, as it is out of shock and frustration that they’d persist. He’s not going to let anyone speak to you in such a way.

But when it pertains to an old friend, the one you were talking about meeting up with for a week straight... now that’s what makes his chest tighten.

Rohan’s going to be in a bad mood because of it, but it’s not too distinct from his usual behavior. No, he’s just a little more quiet than normal. And by the time you cheerfully tell him about seeing this friend of yours, he thinks he may go nuts.

Rohan’s immediate response is to completely shut himself out from everyone, while simultaneously denying any thought he has over being jealous in the first place.

The time he spends locked inside his office is insanely alarming.

At first, you question whether or not you should even say anything about it. Yes, you’re obviously concerned for his health, but Rohan falls into his exaggerated version of workaholic-mode from time to time. And you know him well enough to understand he requires a very careful approach to be pulled out of it.

No, what really warns you that something’s wrong, is that even Koichi asks you if Rohan is doing okay.

His concern takes you aback, and only makes your heart sink further when Josuke (of all people) speaks up about it as well. He’s a lot more reserved about showing any worry, but it’s enough to let you know that something is fundamentally off.

Prodding Rohan for an explanation is going to take a good while.

He’s so unused to feeling jealousy in any capacity that he outright refuses to even admit it to himself.

No, he just needs to work and not interact with anyone. Why? Because he has to; don’t question him. There’s so much he needs to do. You’re far too busy with your old friend in town to pay him any mind anyway.

And that’s exactly the sentiment you finally manage to pull from him.

He spits it out it with crossed arms, not once meeting your gaze. But it’s a mistake (in his mind), because it gets the cogs turning in your mind.

You end up realizing Rohan’s jealous before he does.

Affirmations that you love him is a must, and don’t even bring up the fact that he grew jealous- it would only continue to stir the pot. You know Rohan well, confident in how you choose your words when talking to him about it.

He refuses to give you any indication that he's listening, of course, but one brief glance your way cracks his hardened outer shell.

The look on your face... it initiates this weird sinking feeling deep inside his gut. Just thinking of could halt his movements.

Yes, realistically, he could just use his stand to check whether or not his concern is warranted.

But, for one thing, he’s already promised you he wouldn't do that to you. Setting boundaries is extremely important to Rohan, so he respects the ones you set in return. So much so that the thought of using Heaven’s Door on you doesn’t cross his mind once.

And that look on your face, soft and melancholy upon the realization that he’s been doubting you... he honestly doesn’t need to use his stand to know he's severely misread your relationship with your old friend.

His own ability to recognize how poorly he misunderstood the situation is something he figures he’ll have to unpack at a later time. In that moment, he was just relieved. He told you, rather stubbornly, that he supposes he was wrong. In own his weird, twisted way, that was how he apologized.

In short, being with you is a humbling experience for a person like Rohan and this instance of becoming jealous is certainly a part of that.

Weirdly enough, to his internal surprise, it’s ultimately a pleasurable development. Not like he’d ever tell you, though.

With the passage of time, he even lets you tease him over it. The two of you playfully go back and forth, bringing up times where you both got so jealous. It’s all in good fun, his confidence in your feelings for him stronger than ever.

In reality, him having a bit of humor about it is a clear sign that he’s growing into the relationship more and more. And him being able to be more transparent around you makes it easier for him to talk to you in the future if he gets that jealous again.

There’s still room for growth, but such things are almost always a gradual process for someone like Rohan.

That said, only you’re allowed to make any sort of teasing remarks about the whole ordeal. Anyone else isn’t worthy of doing so.

#johnny’s work #jjba #jojo’s bizarre adventure #josuke higashikata x reader #okuyasu nijimura x reader #koichi hirose x reader #rohan kishibe x reader #diamond is unbreakable #diu #manga #anime #headcanons #jealousy #gender neutral reader #fluff #sfw #part 4 jojo #writing #fanfiction

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hellaarknight · 27 days

Text

Nothing can change the way I see you

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊ ·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊ ·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙

Pairing: Chuuya x femreader Warnings: pet names, mental and physical struggles, being pregnant, a bit oc (a bit more actually) Genre: Fluf/Comfort

Chuuya never thought about seriously having children. Yeah, sure, he did find the idea entertaining, but he could not see himself as a father. Firstly because of his job and the dangers it entails, and secondly because he was afraid of being a shitty father. Probably many other reasons, but these two were enough to engrave in his mind that he would never be a father. And honestly, all was working out when he met you, his now wife, and a person who also did not want kids. So when you presented him with a pregnancy test he was conflicted. Scared. And so were you.

Despite these feelings, he hugged you and reassured you that you would figure it out together. He wiped away your tears when one day you confessed you were afraid his feelings would change with this pregnancy. „Doll... There is no way in hell that my feelings for you will ever change” „But...but... You say that now, but when I will have a belly and stretchmarks and I will be in pain, you will be repulsed by me” His hands cupped your face and he put his forehead onto yours. „Never. There is nothing in this world that could happen to make me lose my feelings. Nothi'g, pretty. You are my everything and despite you not wanting children, you chose to go forward with the pregnancy and gift me a kid. Baby doll, I'm staying by your side every step of this life.”

Unfortunately, no matter how much Chuuya was trying to convince you about his intentions, the story of your work colleagues and some friends did nothing but aggravate a feeling of dread for the pregnancy, birth experience, and whatever would happen afterward. Partners lose interest in their wives, not being attracted by them anymore, being repulsed because they saw the birth of their kids, and not wanting to engage in intimacy anymore, abandoning their spouse to all the chores of the house, minimizing the struggle of a new mom. And these were just some examples of what was told to you and what you read online. But Chuuya... Chuuya wouldn't do something like this, right? Chuuya was unaware of your internal struggles as he worked his but off in the Mafia so he could take more months off to be by your side in this process. It wasn't about the money, he had plenty, but about gaining more time from his life as an executive. Chuuya read a lot about pregnancy, side effects, and everything that had to do with the struggles of becoming a mom. He swore he would try to be as supportive as ever for you and the best dad he could ever be. When the hormones hit you like a brick, having you going from one emotional state to another, he wouldn't get angry once. Instead, he navigated through your mood changes the best he could. Was he going crazy? Yes, absolutely. But never once has he got mad at you. Not once has he raised his voice or made you feel bad about your own outburst, for your tears for your pitiful sight. „Baby, I'm not mad at you.” His voice soft, his hand holding yours while you tried to avoid his gaze. „Yes...hic... you are... I'm a terrible wife... I forgot, I'm sorry, I forgot to pack your lunch and now you're mad”. „No, baby, no, I am not mad, I ate plenty and you are not a terrible wife. You shouldn't even bother to think about doing things for me in this period, ok? You should rest as much as possible. Since the pregnancy is one with risks, you need to focus only on yourself, ok love?”

When you started having morning sickness and emptying your stomach almost every morning, he was there by your side if he was home, holding your hair up and rubbing your back. It pained him to see you vomiting so often, barely eating anything because everything made you nauseous. When in those moments you found yourself disgusting, he found you the most beautiful and amazing woman in the world. You kept pushing through. You kept drinking your prenatal vitamins to have a healthy baby and tried to have a variate diet, even tho you could barely tolerate food. In his eyes, you were shining, glowing, and wiping your mouth after one nauseous episode was the least he could do for you. „Chuu... I'm disgusting, how can you stay here?” Laying with your face near the toilet, tired, as you emptied your stomach for the fourth time today. „Stop talking like this about yourself, honey. It is something natural that happens and there is nothing to be disgusted of. C'me here, let me clean you up and I'll carry you to bed, you should sleep, you're barely getting around. And I'll have something else cooked when you wake up and you'll try again to eat, 'key baby?”

Chuuya was sure, there was nothing in this world, nothing that this pregnancy could bring that would make him look at you with less adoration. His feelings only grew bigger, if possible, he found you more and more charming every day, every day that belly grew and you faced another struggle in the process.

#chuuya x you #bsd chuuya #chuuya nakahara #bungou stray dogs #chuuya x reader #chuuya bsd #hellawrites #bsd men #bungou stray dogs chuuya #bungo stray dogs x reader #chuuya fanfic #pregnancy #nakahara chuuya #bungo stray dogs

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jennamoran · 3 months

Text

The Far Roofs

cover art by Isip Xin

Hi!

Today I'm going to talk a little bit more about my forthcoming RPG, the Far Roofs. I've previously talked about

general principles,

the rats,

and the campaign.

Today, I want to talk about the Mysteries.

Up on the distant roofs, you see, the rats hunt, and are hunted, by these ... things. These vast, impossible god-monsters.

The Mysteries.

These things that are as much experiences as beings.

I like to anchor them to real-world myths. That's mostly an authorial choice, rather than something intrinsic to their character---

I think if I named them all in some made-up language of my own, called them all things like, I dunno, Alolitha or Eidumir, then they'd come across as cooler ... but also harder to get a handle on.

You'd have to be immersed in the setting to really get what they're about.

So I give most of them a byname that's more accessible. Something like Harpy, Hoop Snake, Lennan-Shee---whatever---so that you can tap into your memories or impressions of real-world mythology and the work of fantasists and cultural tropes and monster manuals from other games and the stories of your childhood and all of that.

Even still, they are vast things.

You might be forgiven, if I just named them without that prelude, in thinking that they seem vast to the rats because the rats are small. Thinking, perhaps, that you could fight off a Mystery like Jackalope, say, or Hippocampus ... if you were lucky, or had a gun ... whereas a rat might have a harder time.

The thing is, to walk in the realm of myth is to lose your grounding in the world. On the Far Roofs you can't rely on your ability to frame a story or a conflict through a rationalistic lens. The Mysteries are not physical creatures of a certain size, but rather the animating spirits of dramatic, life-changing experiences. Like the starring monster of a horror movie, or divinity that visits you in dreams, it's loosely possible to pay them off, or punch them out, or argue with them about Naruto, or whatever, but you can't really extrapolate out from that to resolve whatever underlying problem they can be.

Jackalope isn't a thing you shoot, or whatever:

It's a thing you encounter on dark nights, sometimes, and can't ever really prove you've seen. Maybe you don't even encounter it, just ... find its tracks.

It's not a conflict you can easily rewrite.

As for something like Harpy ... she is dead, the rats have killed her ... and even dead and disembodied your fate is very likely in her hands.

This kind of thing is why the rats are valid protagonists in this world:

In the face of the Mysteries, there's not much difference between the standings of a human and a rat. We are all such small, imperiled things.

Each of the Mysteries is tied to some internal state. Some mood or emotion or whatever. It's not clear how much that's true, and how much that's a game convention, and how much that's how the rats, who you're going to be getting most of your basic information from, understand them.

... but it's at least a little bit "all three."

This is, fundamentally, an authorial choice. The Far Roofs is an expressionist game. It's a game about emotion bleeding out into reality, about moods and experiences taking on physical or quasi-physical form in the world or narrative around us. So that's part of why I made the Mysteries like this.

The other part is, if you want to make up your own Mysteries, it helps a lot that you can start with an internal state.

Deciding to make up "Centaur" as a Mystery is kind of boring. I think.

Deciding to make a Mystery named Centaur that is on some level "about" mind-body duality or immersion in the body, or wisdom, or the post-exercise endorphin mood, or having ADHD ("I'm stuck on a horse that's going where it wants"), or whatever ... that's a bit more interesting.

Starting with a mood you want to talk about, I think, like ... Sorrow ... and figuring out what mythical entity best matches that (I'd go with Banshee), and then figuring out how its stories work from there:

I think that's the most interesting option of them all.

I do give some of them fancy made-up names, to be clear. I'm not opposed to having an Alolitha or Eidumir or whatever around! But that's not the default or primary approach.

In theory, the game expects you to make up most of the Mysteries you encounter.

In practice, there's a built-in campaign that features a bunch of them, so there are enough worked examples in the book that you might never have to come up with one from scratch:

there's solid summaries of about three dozen, plus

in-depth writeups of Goblin, Harpy, Hoop Snake, Unicorn, and four other Mysteries that map a bit less precisely to established myths.

There's a lot in those in-depth writeups, but my favorite parts are the pages that are just questions the GM can ask the players when that Mystery is at hand.

(Questions, sometimes statements, sometimes actions or power uses, but ... it's the questions that I love.)

I have spent the better part of a decade working on power sets for spiritual, mystical, and divine entities, and you can find some cool rules toys for the more purely mechanically minded here. I like how their game-mechanical writeups all turned out.

... but in both practice and theory, none of that is as cool to me as the list of asides and questions the GM can crib from when the Mystery is involved. Simple stuff like "the wind is rising" or "speak to me of solitude." More nuanced stuff like GM-as-Death playing a spade suit card and saying, "tell me of a nasty accident, and how you avoided or survived it." In every case, a bunch of options.

As a reader, I love the detailed mechanics more. As a reader, I don't really care that much about the actual how of how the Mysteries do things but I love that there is a how. It tickles an important part of my brain, deep down.

... but when I'm actually GMing, I love the lists of phenomena and questions so very much.

I am admittedly usually in a constant state of panic when GMing, so perhaps I get more value out of both the cue card function and the ability to hand off responsibility to the player than others would.

Perhaps.

If you're curious about those examples:

The wind rises when you're dealing with Harpy because a lot of her story is the story about how being on the Far Roofs is like falling, like flying, like losing the stable influence of the ground. So naturally you feel the air. You feel the motion. It arises. Naturally you become isolated, or at least experience intermittent solitude, because the ground ultimately mediates almost every social connection and interaction.

Maybe not love or skydiving teams, I guess.

When Death's presence is weighty in your life ... well, it's in your life, so you're probably not dead yet, but stuff happens! You nearly died!

I like that you don't have to think through that theory when playing with this stuff, but it's still all right there, implicit, presented in a couple of different forms.

That's what I have to say tonight!

From the Cutting Room Floor for this Post:

... there is still a part of my brain that loves it when you write up the power that lets the Christian God be three species of hypostasis and a single ousia, or whatever, and loves it even more when you can use the same power to combine three mechs.

I have not written up that specific power, though, to be clear, as I rarely put either Christianity or mecha in my games (albeit, see Invisible Mecha) ...

#the far roofs #jenna moran #ttrpgs #invisible mecha

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valentine-writes · 10 months

Note

Spot nation is here humbly requesting again u-u One of your recent works breifly touched on The Spot getting protective over an upset reader. Would love to read your take on expanding that concept. :^] Make it as lighthearted or serious as you like! Maybe the reader has to tell him to chill out instead. Like, we love you queen but take it easy. No worries if this isn't smthn you want to do! Loving your writing in general! Take care :>

「 tws + notes: POSSIBLE FLASH WARNING FOR THE GIF BELOW THE CUT?? (jus to be safe!! idk if this is needed or not-), no tws, unedited, super silly moment from me im not in a slash srs mood 」

「 gn!reader, can be platonic or romantic <3 」

↳ ft. johnathan ohnn/the spot

author's note: AUWWHJWAB HELLO!!! u are so so polite omg thank u so much ! ^_^ i luv tha enthusiasm i've been seein from spot nation tbh!!! o((>ω< ))o i'd be happy to expand on that hc! im gon make it a little teeny tiny bit more lighthearted becuz i luv myself some silly hcs but here we go!! super duper soz if itz a bit short anon </3

▸ i think i like writing the spot as a silly lil dude who is jus tryin so so hard. but also he did work for Fucked Up Evil and Co. (alchemax is just brimming w/ all sorts of brilliant minds with horrifying ideas in the name of science. kingpin ran this shit and would not have it any other way) like he's not beyond being an absolute menace he just didn't have the means for it at the beginning of the movie. so we're gonna keep it lighthearted and silly but,,,

we're gonna keep this in mind too, yeah?

▸ you're incredibly dear to him. he's become a little more protective than he usually would be (can't have you being taken away from him! not after literally everyone else in life life ditched–) and it's just the littlest bit unhealthy.

he really does mean well! you just find yourself reminding him to dial it down a bit.

▸ especially after he's gotten a hang of using his powers?... he's got the means to keep you from harm. he may still be insecure about his appearance, but those thoughts can be (temporarily) satiated when he knows what he can do.

the power at the multiverse, in the palm of his hand

i mean. you can't expect him to not want to defend you with it.

▸ you remind him, time and time again that he really doesn't need to check up on you that frequently. in spite of this, he can't help peeking into a portal, just to check on you here and there.

"i swear to you, i'll be fine." you tell him, time and time again- and he trusts you, he really does. but it doesn't hurt to be absolutely, positively, 100% certain, right?

▸ on the days you're upset because of a particularly bad day (not specifically conflict with people, just little things or internal issues, etc, etc... the Horrors,,,,) he offers the support he knows that he'd want.

if you're a person who's obvious with their emotions, he's pretty okay with picking up the cues you're not doing fine. will start up a conversation and then awkwardly ask if you're doing okay.

it's a little more tricky if you're subtle. overtime, he learns what to look for- little signs that indicate you're not doing well- and ensures that he's straightforward in asking about how you're feeling.

and sometimes, he able to sense that something is off. there's a tension in the air neither of you want to talk about, a feeling in his bones that he can't quite shake. he dislikes this the most. mainly because it's easy to attribute this feeling to overthinking. he'll check up on how you're feeling anyways. even if it takes a while to muster the courage.

without fail, he feels his heart break a bit when you look up at him with the saddest expression he's seen on your face. your frown is almost painful to see :(

he's got a very formulaic strategy in his mind that he uses to help you deal with bad days

something like this mefinks,,,

[ step a: he starts by asking what's going on with you... ask how you're feeling and all that. if your mood is negative, he'll try to ask why and if you wanna talk about it ]

if you choose to take up the offer, go to step b. if you refuse, go to step c.

[ step b: listen! provide support, be attentive. he'll let you rant, scream about it (ok maybe not too loud though, but,, y'know. if it helps, it helps), cry- anything. if you do cry, go to step d ]

[ step c: distract!! distract, distract, distract. you got a favourite comfort show or movie? he tells you: hey, you haven't watched it in a while (even if you have), why don't we put it on? your favorite video game? he'll play with you! talk about your favorite things or talk about nothing while you grab a snack or drink. he knows avoiding stuff isn't gonna work for long term problems, but he's more than willing to cheer you up ]

[ step d: SILENTPANICSILENTPANIC... internally he's just kinda freaking out because it's hard to see you cry. he's not awful with comfort- just a little stiff, y'know? much better with distractions. but in the event of you crying: he'll rub your back, wrap his arms around you. or give you space (depending on what you need) probably goes "hey, no, no no- it's okay, it's okay-" while attempting to soothe you. gives you time to cry it out while he babbles reassurances under his breath. ]

he really does try his best (´꒳｀。)

▸ if you're beefing with someone and it's making you upset, he'll listen to you complain about them. out here nodding and agreeing with you like he was there to witness. again, he's got your back!!

(this part partially inspired by @//spdrslayr 's posts!!) in interest of cheering you up,,, you two make fun of the person.

if you're someone to openly bitch about someone and aren't afraid of getting a little mean behind someone's back,, he's making fun of them too.

of course, if you're like "noo,, but like,,, that's mean-" he's quick to remind you what they did. like they had the audacity, there's no need to be sorry.

if you're consumed by harrowing guilt anytime you're remotely rude (even behind someone's back) he'll tone the jokes down. just a little. he can be VERY a little out of pocket.

likes watching you try not to lose it, stifling laughter, as you share a moment over mutual hatred for said person

"hey– that wasn't.. that wasn't funny–" you're snicker, doing very little to hide the obvious smile on your face. he loves seeing your face brighten, the frown on it now replaced with a grin you just can't hold back

he's gonna crack jokes about them randomly too in your conversations. he's good at holding a grudge yeah,,, but at least in this case he's funny abt it. it's lowkey starting to sound like he was wronged instead of you.

▸ if someone hurts you? that's a whole other story. (hehe. whole- my bad.)

being inconsiderate, rude, and mean to you is one thing, but bringing physical harm to you?

he can't stand the idea that someone would want to harm you. it doesn't matter what happened in the events leading to it. he knows you didn't deserve it. he knows it. the minute he sees the tears stinging in your eyes,, the bruising on your body– the blood–

someone's going to have to answer for it.

(but im not talking abt him tryin to rock someone's shit becuz that would be 10x longer blehhhh :p)

#possible flash warning #the spot atsv #across the spiderverse #atsv #atsv x reader #the spot #the spot x reader #the spot headcanons #johnathan ohnn #johnathan ohnn x reader #johnathon ohnn #johnathon ohnn x reader #again tagging for this guy. ueueueueueu.... soundsns of cryhing....

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bestanimatedmovie · 1 year

Text

Choose your favorite!

Vote in the other polls!

What fans say:

Inside Out:

Besides the fact of "being a Pixar movie", this movie is a masterpiece, and it has really impacted me. Its message about accepting that "bad" emotions such as sadness are part of life and have its positive side and that "good" emotions like joy can be negative and toxic is really important and one that I'm still trying to internalize 8 years since I first watched the movie.

Wolfwalkers:

The animation is absolutely gorgeous, with a unique style. The music is wonderful, the story is touching. What's not to love!!!!!!

It's beautiful! If I'd watched this as a young girl it would've done something to my brain, in a good way. It's about being stifled by England and those in power, in 1600s Ireland. It's about little girls becoming best friends. It's really sweet, and wonderful. I love the scene where Robyn gets to really have fun and play as a wolf.

Wolfwalkers has beautiful stylized animation. The story is about conflict between the oppressive English colonizers of an Irish town, and their old ways of living in harmony with the forest. When the main character Robyn is in the town, the style she and the backgrounds are drawn in have an angular style made up of flat shapes that don‘t turn in perspective, similar to a woodcut print, showing the limitedness of the town worldview. When Robyn is in the forest at first she is drawn in the town style, but as she is introduced to Mebh, the style shifts to a loose, pencil-lined style with soft shapes and forms that turn three-dimensionally. Later, at key points in the story, Robyn shifts between these styles to reflects whether she is conforming to or breaking away from the town‘s rigid system. It‘s a beautiful way to subtly tie animation to storytelling. I also of course love the story for its queer, environmentalist, and anticolonial themes. It‘s an excellent movie and everyone should see it.

It has some wonderful animation, especially in the wolf scenes, and tells a story that pulls from the history of the English colonisation of Ireland.

The art style is gorgeous and the story is lovely.

It is the most beautifully done 2d animation I've ever seen, beautifully drawn and with such interesting stylistic choices for the backgrounds and the character design, the best shapes. Perspective is really played around with in wide shots that show the town, giving it an even more boxy and closed-off feel to it! My favorite scene would have to be when the song Running With The Wolves by AURORA plays. It makes me cry like a baby they're so beautiful and playful and free and learning to have strength and courage.......

It tells a really beautiful story about identity and friendship and being brave enough to stand up to your oppressors

The animation is gorgeous and well-utilized to convey tone/mood and also little wolf girls are valid and the scenery is [chef’s kiss]

The animation is really stylized which I like. The art style is one-of-a-kind, changing slightly depending on what's happening in the story. Like, for example, Robyn, one of the main characters in the story, started being drawn using cleaner lines when she was still "civilized", in contrast to Mebh, a girl from a tribe that lives in the forest and can turn into a wolf. As Robyn started becoming "wilder", spending time w Mebh, the lineart becomes more sketchy. It's just a really really pretty film. The story is also really really good. The characters are complex and develop throughout the movie. You can understand why Robyn's dad acts the way he does, but still allows him to see the errors in his ways. Also Mebh and Robyn are just fuckin adorable. This movie made me cry so hard and I hardly ever do that Also the soundtrack? MYGOD. perfect. Favourite scene is definitely Mebh and Robyn's wolf scene where Robyn was learning how to be a wolfwalker. The music and animation in that is so good. Idk i really i really love this movie bc it feels so... ALIVE. It uses the animation medium really well, doesn't shy away from the 2Dness and stylizeness of it, which I wish more animated stuff would do.

The animation !!!! Is so gorgeous !!! The art style is so gorgeous, in some places super details and in some moments mimicking medieval styles with symbolic (rather than realistic) perspective, it's so so so beautiful. The music is also amazing, and the story is beautifully put together, it will make you weep.

#Inside Out #Wolfwalkers #best animated movie #round 2 #tournament poll #tumblr's favorite

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hephaestiions · 2 months

Note

Inspired by your Drarry fic recs and your amazing Flintwood fic, do you have any Flintwood recs or personal favorites?

ah! fantastic ask, anon! flintwood was, incidentally, my earliest hp ship & maintains a soft spot after all these years. their functions in canon (quidditch captains of rival houses, pinnacles of a certain kind of obsessive, single-minded, aggressive athletic masculinity) conduce some of the most raw and gritty characterisations— kind of like if tracing your tongue along the jagged, broken end of a tooth was a ship. flintwood encapsulates a very specific kind of mood— a foregrounded physicality, a delicious emotional dimension balancing both subtlety and brashness. this ship is especially delightful when you're in the mood for some deferred emotional payoff, a little out of reach and more satisfying for it.

(tw for some discussions of queerphobia & masculinity!)

flintwood also works with and subverts some common stereotypes & tropes associated with sports as a site of exalted & amplified masculinity. oliver and marcus are both, in fic, often representations of what a popular (largely homophobic & patriarchal) culture understands as 'masculine ideal stereotypes'— physically hulking, emotionally repressed, narrow-focused, a little dangerous. and flintwood, as a ship, is crucially also about these 'ideal men' making the choice to step away from the hallowed halls of homosociality towards explicit queer desire, dynamics and love.

i'm getting into this because a large selection of flintwood fics i've loved deal (overtly or covertly) with coming to terms with queer awakenings, reckoning with being queer men in sports and similar explorations. my flintwood fic (thank you for reading it, anon!), addictive tendencies (~4k, T, tw for internalised homophobia) also grapples with this fairly significantly. in fact, even when the central tension isn’t explicitly about a queer reckoning, and the worldbuilding has little/no queerphobia, many excellent flintwood fics have some of the themes, ideas and tropes you find in literature accounting for our society’s (often disparaging) attitude towards queerness: a desire both intense and grudging, a sense of “i can’t have this person” justified through rivalry and/or jealousy, poignant internal conflicts, etc.

anyway, enough talk, here's a selection of flintwood fics i've dearly enjoyed, hope you do too! mind the tags & notes & remember to send some love the authors' way :)

best kept secrets by slyther_ing (M, 1.8k)

Marcus Flint is leaning up by the metal chainlink fence - gum popping, grin flashing white, and Oliver has the urge to run away because everything in the taller boy’s stature screams trouble, trouble, trouble.

twenty gauge by provocative_envy (T, 3k)

It takes Marcus less than ninety seconds to determine that his four o'clock is an aggressively annoying piece of shit.

wake up, get up, shut up by provocative_envy (E, 4.2k)

Marcus is twenty-three and half-concussed when it finally occurs to him that he might actually kind of sort of be really into dudes.

rugby boys, they play 15s by thistlecat (M, 4.5k)

Fifteen significant moments in Oliver Wood’s collegiate rugby career that did not make his highlight tape.

no vacancy by provocative_envy (M, 10.1k)

The dreams are frightening, at first.

true but not nice by v (E, 10.2k)

Marcus found out about it from Warrington, who heard it from Montague, who heard it from Derrick, who heard it from Nott, who heard it from Zabini, who heard it from Malfoy, who they said heard from the Quidditch dressing room, which really just meant that Marcus was going to fucking kill him.

self preservation by al-the-remix (E, 17.8k)

Outside the night had grown dark, and at some point Oliver had moved to perch on the edge of Marcus' bed, thigh pressed against his and tray settled between them. As if they had some sort of understanding. As if they were friends.

#flintwood #marcus flint #oliver wood #oliver wood x marcus flint #geets recs #flintwood fic recs #flintwood rec list

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taffycandyqt · 2 months

Note

👉👈 can I get some head-cannons on how 1987 and 2003 Casey would act as dads to his and the readers kid…….i have to imagine ‘87 Casey would be an interesting parental figure……not a bad one just very…..very interesting

Very interesting indeed...

03' & 87' Casey Jones x reader

Warnings none:

Fluff

2003 Casey:

Will cal the child squirt, tiny, chump, and/or kiddo

It all just depends on his mood.

If the kid is a girl he'll definitely call her princess or little darling and if they're a boy he'll call him little man, or buff little man.

He will love the crap out of your kids, dude is honestly so happy to be a dad.

When he first married you he wanted kids but he was also pretty scared and wasn't sure he was ready.

When it finally happened though?

He was so happy.

Just picture this man laying in the bed with your new born in his hands while they moved their little hands around without any real reason.

He would have literal stars in his eyes.

Dude would probably start taking his baseball bat with him every time he left the house.

Ain't no way he's going out with his kids without proper protection in New York of all places.

He would have a blast teaching the kids about hockey and if they were genuinely interested hockey games would become their biggest bonding moments.

Bro is honestly just a really fun dad.

Any game the kids play with him he will be 100% into it.

Doesn't matter what role he's playing he will literally destroy your house if your kids say it's what his character would do.

In short you had to tell the kids (and your fully grown adult husband) that real weapons were not, infact, toys and to stop stabbing your furniture.

You almost blew a gasket when you walked in the room to see Casey rip one of your couch pillows in half.

Yeeeeeah...

He won't be doing that again.

Also, ice cream trips are a staple in your house.

the kids want iced cream?? Why not!

Honestly he wants ice cream just as much as them.

If you say no he will join in with the kids and either try to get you to say yes or just try and convince you with puppy dog eyes.

when you kids hit the rebellious teen phase he will wil feel so much internal conflict.

On the one hand what they are doing is extremely dangerous, irresponsible, and/or disrespectful and it's infuriating.

But on the other... He also did those things at their age.

...

BUT HE WASN'T AS BAD (this is true. He was worse)

He is still happy with their teenage stage though.

The proud dad moments will be golden.

I feel like your guys kids would gravitate towards certain turtle uncles.

They would just click more with one than the other and he's happy to see his kids still having a connection with his old friends.

Mikey will complain to him often though if none of your kids pick him as their favorite uncle.

Overall, Casey is a top tier dad.

1987 Casey:

This dude is an entire basket case.

Not to say he isn't a good dad! He is.

You just have to thoroughly explain child safety and proper emotional reactions.

Examples would be, "You can't let our kid beat up their teacher for giving them an unfair grade" or "you can't hand a toddler a golf club to swing around the house" or "Sticking a fork in an electrical outlet will electrocute them"

Once you show him how to legally and safely go about certain situations, there actually aren't many problems!

He is very strict on what he believes to be right and wrong.

While his methods may be a tad counterproductive he means well and he will do everything in his power to mold your kids into well mannered law abiding citizens.

And in case you were wondering, he sees the whole beating up the teacher thing as the teacher lying on an official government document sooooooo.

In any case he's doing his best.

Casey doesn't really spend much time around the turtles in this version so their less like uncles to your kids and more just, "People dad knows".

If your kids show an interest in the turtles though, he will make a point to hang around more often.

When it comes to his mask Casey likes to leave it on.

It makes him feel prepared for any potential danger and he honestly doesn't feel fully dressed without it.

9 times out of 10 though, if your kids ask him to take it off he will.

He just loves them so much, and as paranoid as he can be he still wants his kids to know their fathers real face.

When it comes to raising your kids he is usually the one dishing out punishments. Not because you don't, he's just quicker at it.

He understands your kids are learning the ins and outs of life and he wants to make sure they know the consequences of their actions so they're prepared when they go out into the real world.

That being said he is also very fair.

If your kid didn't know something was wrong he won't punish them.

He'll just tell them why it was wrong and not to do it again. If they do it after that? Then they get time-out.

Like 2003 Casey, he is also very playful and loves playing games with the kids.

He will run with them around the house, dress up in costumes, do weird voices and all that jazz.

It's so cute honestly. This big buff dude in a hockey mask who prides himself in his strength and ruthless attitude towards "evil doers" will also have the most legitimate tea party while your kids call him Mrs. Whittlebottom.

With the way you both go about raising your kids it seems unlikely, to me, that they would become rebellious teens.

However if that were to happen Casey would be at a complete loss.

Casey has never felt tied down by the rules or "the man" as long as they kept the peoples best interest at heart.

Don't steal things, don't break others property, don't sell harmful substances.

It all made perfect sense to him.

When people follow the rules they are happy and safe and peaceful.

People don't get hurt and they are able to do what they love.

So when your children express feeling trapped by the rules of the house or call the punishment they get by breaking them "unfair" he is straight up confused.

Like, what do you mean its unfair that your growned for seeking out?! You know it's against the rules and you could have gotten hurt! WTF???

This could potentially cause a lot of tension between Casey and your kids but at the end of the day they still love each other.

It just might take some time for them to properly understand the other.

For everyone's sake though, let's not bet on your kids hitting the rebellious phase.

Also, your kids may or may not pick up some of his weird mannerisms such as calling criminals "evil doers" or hunting down literally anyone in the name of justice.

Yeah, it really doesn't help he raises them on super hero shows.

All in all, very dedicated husband and father. Will literally die for his family.

#tmnt 87 #tmnt 1987 #teenage mutant ninja turtles #teenage mutant ninja turtle 1987 #1987 casey #2003 casey jones x reader #casey jones x reader #casey x reader #2003 casey jones #1987 Casey Jones #87 Casey x reader

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writingquestionsanswered · 1 year

Note

do you have any posts on writing emotional pain? thank you in advance!!!

Writing Emotional Pain

Conveying emotional pain is about more than what you write in the moment... it's about the foundation you've laid ahead of time, too. When you're watching a TV show or movie and a character experiences emotional pain, you feel that emotional pain because you've gotten to know and care about the character over time. You understand who they are, where they came from, what they want, what they need, and what's at stake if they don't get what they want and need. So when something causes them emotional pain, you understand why it caused them pain, which makes you feel that pain sympathetically.

Laying a Foundation

That said, the key to writing effective emotional pain is to make sure you lay that foundation ahead of time by doing the following:

-- create well-rounded, engaging characters -- flesh your characters out and help them grow -- give an idea of where they came from and... -- how their history affected who they became -- establish relevant internal/external conflict -- establish relevant internal/external goals -- establish what they think they need emotionally and... -- drop hints about what they actually need emotionally -- establish stakes (what's lost if they don't reach goals/change)

Doing the above will help your reader connect with the character so that they'll care about the emotional pain they experience when they experience it.

Elevating Emotional Pain in the Moment

As long as you've laid a good foundation, there are things you can do in the moment to elevate that pain for the reader, but they won't work on their own. You have to lay that foundation first. After that, you can elevate the pain in the moment by doing the following:

-- effectively illustrating the situation (what caused the pain) -- using sensory description (see/hear/smell/taste/texture) -- using mood (atmosphere and ambience) to match emotion -- using external emotional cues (facial expressions/body language) -- using internal emotional cues ("heart, mind, and stomach") -- addressing character's thoughts and feelings on matter -- addressing other characters' thoughts and feelings when possible -- showing what matters through other characters when appropriate

I hope that helps!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I've been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I've learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

Learn more about WQA

Visit my Master List of Top Posts

Go to ko-fi.com/wqa to buy me coffee or see my commissions

#writing tips #writing help #writing advice #wqaadvice

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kallesque · 3 months

Text

the conflict of the mind — two.

cws // descriptions of gore, blood, surgery, implied/referenced self-harm, and self-destructive behaviour.

╰┈➤ dottore x reader: continuation of the previous chapter. FIC MASTERLIST HERE.

𖤐 You meet what you assume is his gaze, hoping none of your thoughts are showing through your expression. “Would you rather I stare, then?”

“Perhaps.” He smiles like a knife and the gleam of his teeth sets you on edge further, amplifying your distress. “Oh, don’t look so wretchedly terrified. Much as I enjoy that, it makes for boring company.”

Dinner is awkward and strained— at least on your part— the Harbinger makes no effort to break the layer of tension that freezes the air between you, though you suppose you should be relieved that he does nothing to worsen the anxiety simmering beneath your skin. Yet.

For the most of it, at least you keep your face blank and your voice relatively steady. He doesn’t seem like the sort to tolerate any display of emotional weakness— and far be it from you to exhibit something so personal, so vulnerable.

The cut on your cheek stings in the cold, dry air. You do your best to ignore it.

You watch him, noting how the mask remains firmly affixed to his visage even as he eats. Your own food is barely touched— it’s good, but your appetite is practically nonexistent as you chew slowly. You’ve noted that each Harbinger presides over a respective wing of the Palace, but you’re not aware of much else other than the understanding that your own residence lies on the outskirts of Dottore’s wing.

From what you’ve seen (or the lack of), the staff that work under the Second is scant, the hallways mostly deserted of organic life. Sometimes you hear voices from the direction of the research and scientific laboratories, where Dottore’s office lies.

It perplexes you because the timbre and cadence of the people speaking are always eerily similar, yet their moods and intonations are never quite the same. Discordant in the same way that you’ve heard in some contemporary music pieces, right yet wrong. You can’t quite put your finger on it, the distance distorting what little you could hear until you’d simply given up.

Safe to say, you’ve kept only to your rooms on the same corridor— you dare not venture further. But as Dottore led you through the hallways with nary a glance back to see if you were keeping up, you’d quickly realised that memorising the layout of this area would be in your best interests if you wanted to avoid future inconveniences.

Il Dottore’s voice cuts through the silence as sharp as the knife he holds, slicing his food up with frightening precision. “Refrain from practising tomorrow. I want you in my laboratory by noon.”

Your protest dies on your lips in resignation. Strictly speaking, it’s not an issue— you see the merit in moderating your practice sessions. The injuries from overtaxing yourself in your work are nasty to deal with and the process of recovery is a setback you’re unwilling to endure again. As your patron, he exercises the right to make such requests, even if it sounds more like an order. You know this, and the realisation of your own foolishness settles into you; you’ve spent your first month here driving yourself to exhaustion, forgetting to pay attention to your physical condition.

Your composition shouldn’t be hindered much away from your instruments and you can keep yourself occupied until noon… but it’s the latter part of his statement that causes your breath to quicken and your fingers to tense. “What will I be doing, Lord Harbinger?”

“You’ll find out.”

You try to busy yourself with choking down the food before you, fearful of appearing ungrateful. He said you would assist him earlier, but would he change his mind, veer off into more gruesome prospects for you?

The disappearance of a single musician wouldn’t be a cause for concern at all.

Quiet, you scold your internal monologue, trying to stifle the pessimism that infects your thoughts. Your lack of response calls the Doctor to drum his fingers on the table, breaking you out of your daze.

“It’s rude to avoid eye contact with the one speaking to you, Composer.”

You meet what you assume is his gaze, hoping none of your thoughts are showing through your expression. “Would you rather I stare, then?”

Though dread still thrums its constant tempo in accompaniment to your pulse, you feel a spike of exasperation at his neverending arrogance and you’re about to avert your gaze when he slides his elbow a fraction across the table, shifting closer to you.

“I’m not going to eat you alive.”

The oppressive feeling of being watched only intensifies. If this is how things are when his eyes are covered, you shudder to think of how much worse it would be should you ever face the misfortune of invoking his full attention, unmasked.

You swallow on nothing, throat bobbing as you do, and reply. “Somehow, I have trouble believing that.”

There’s that laugh again, the one that drags a blade down the length of your spine, threading discomfort through your vertebrae. “You’ll have to put some faith in me, Composer.” The words spill from his tongue like the utterance of a holy commandment, implication more than meets the eye. Faith is an art lost to both of you— he walks a path contradistinctive to that of the Gods, and you hold no devotion to anything other than your music. The irony is not lost on Dottore, as he watches you intently. You’re still far too cautious around him and not for poor reason, but he catches hints of your true temperament sometimes— the unconscious lift of a brow, the half-disbelieving sigh you suppress. The outburst you’d had merely an hour ago, all signs that you aren’t as subdued and unfeeling as you try to be.

Dottore wonders idly how far he can push you before he reminds himself that he is merely observing. The line drawn between performer and audience is intangible yet there all the same: you may look, but you may not touch.

Gloved fingers flex, imperceptible.

What a shame he’s always had a penchant for breaking boundaries.

Dinner finishes itself up with relative silence after that and you creep back to the music room to gather your scores and writing tools up, bringing them back to your room.

That night, you hear bloodcurdling screaming from down the hall, chilling you to the bone.

You practically mummify yourself in your blankets to block out the sound, staring at the ceiling until your eyes water uncomfortably for lack of moisture.

Sleep claims you uneasily.

The day repeats itself from the beginning and you’re pondering vaguely at how your life here has been playing on dull repetition— save for the wrench thrown into your daily plans last night by the Doctor. There’s no one around to personally ban you from stealing into the music room, but you will not cross a Harbinger so directly. You remember the feeling of being surveyed, studied, and it makes the knot in your throat tangle tighter.

Despite the awareness that you could and should engage yourself with other things— there’s your dissertation, for one, and a song you’d written with lyrics that don’t flow quite perfectly yet— your mind seems insistent on driving itself to the brink of exhaustion, so you find yourself wasting the morning hours in a haze, thoughts draped in a heavy daze you can't seem to lift.

Dottore’s presence is no less overwhelming when you enter his laboratory at noon and you have to suck in a sharp breath when you turn to see him right there, watching. The sleeves of his shirt are rolled above the elbow, the accessories that you’d seen him wear twice before stripped away save for the harness that encircles his neck and dips beneath his shirt. His hands are encased in surgical gloves rather than the usual leather ones.

“You,” he acknowledges, and you find yourself scrambling to keep up with for the second time as he leads you deeper into the heart of the laboratory. “Come.”

You exhale in relief when he finally looks away. The invisible weight of his gaze makes you more nervous than you’ve ever felt— you've performed for large crowds before, yet you'd prefer the multitudes of those eyes on you over his unreadable scrutiny.

All coherent thought stutters to a halt when you see the body strapped to the metal table, torso opened up in a blossom of bloodstained flesh. You can hardly believe it when Dottore beckons you forward, closer to the carnage— you swallow something that feels like nausea, bile creeping up the back of your throat. Do not look, do not look, do not look—

“What is this?” you ask, your voice filtering in from a distance, sounding completely foreign to you.

“A traitor from within the ranks.” Dottore’s voice is unemotional, completely pragmatic. You don’t understand how he can just… “He tried to sell confidential Fatui information for a profit. This is his reward.”

You can feel your nails digging into your palms, little crescent-moon gouges welling up with blood. Your wrists ache sharply at the strain you’re exerting and you try to relax, you truly do— but it all goes to hell when Dottore casts you a sideways glance and breezes right on without expecting an answer. “Pass me that, will you?”

Is this some sort of test?

Through the roaring of blood in your ears, you locate what he’s referring to from the nearby worktop, and comply on clockwork. You wish you could find some kind of justification in what he’s doing— but when he takes the scalpel from your hands and makes a deft incision that drags a scream to life in the still air, you realise that the man on the table is still breathing despite his state and the horror of it sticks to the fine hairs on your skin, a slow-acting poison that paralyses you into silence.

You squeeze your eyes shut, taking refuge in the blissful darkness behind your eyelids for a split second.

Dottore seems to tire of the man’s whimpering soon enough, a sound that rumbles like a growl and vibrates like a purr clawing at the cage of his ribs like a savage beast. The edge of the surgical blade is set against the weakly pulsing throat and you can’t even protest— can’t even intercede before the jugular is sliced open and blood sprays everywhere. Red stipples your cheek, staining your hands and your torso— there is so much of it, yet the Harbinger doesn’t even flinch.

Somehow, you get through the entire procedure without your knees giving out on you, obeying the Doctor’s direction with mechanical passivity. Although your mind continues to scream danger at you, you’re unable to process anything because all you can see is crimson, the harsh lights of the laboratory searing into your retinas, photoreceptors in your eyes projecting nothing but the garish colour on repeat. You’ve never considered yourself particularly squeamish around the sight of blood, but it’s something about the calculated ruthlessness of it all— the unflinching brutality as Dottore takes the body apart and rends sinew from tendon that sends the chill resonating deep beyond your bones down into the marrow. You’d handed him the knife, but you’re aware he’s perfectly capable of executing what he wanted himself. You weren’t a necessary variable there. An ornamentative note crushed into the melody, simply present for… what?

Dottore’s hands are gloved in gore all the way up to the elbows. The ringing in your ears tolls incessantly, harshly, and you suppress the childish hysteria that almost drives you to clasp your fingers over your ears. You might’ve succumbed anyway, were it not for the fact that someone else’s blood is still drying on your skin.

Oh, god, you really can’t breathe.

None of the rumours you’ve heard about his experiments can measure up to the true atrocity of it. The adrenaline that courses through your bloodstream is the only thing that keeps you standing upright, because the only other surface available is the dissection table and you’d rather die than take another step towards the corpse as much as you can help it.

Inhumane, that’s what this was.

But the cacophony of conflict that wages war within you doesn’t surge up— your tongue sets itself firmly between the rows of your teeth and Dottore doesn’t stop you when you slip away without a word.

Your knees hit the tiled floor of your bathroom and you are curling up, fingers tangled together, kneeling with no god to go to. The water is scalding but you pay it no caution, welcoming the burn. Red slides off your fingertips and you scrub at your skin with your nails desperately, the blood diluting and swirling onto the floor in sluggish spirals. The steam clouds your lungs, scorching and thick and suffocating, but all you can smell is the metallic tang of blood and your next intake of breath feels more like hyperventilation. You rake your nails down your arms again, the sting of it doing little to soothe you.

Your hands are scoured clean, skin chafed and red from your efforts by now, so why do you still feel this way?

The feeling of blood caked beneath your nails lingers. You stare at your hands for a moment more before you get up, clothing yourself in a stupor and moving to your desk outside.

You’ve always had a habit of clipping your nails too short, cutting and filing down to the quick and leaving your fingertips red and raw. It started as a matter of logic— at least to you, because the longer it took for your nails to grow out again, the more time you had before you faced the inconvenience once more. Over time, though, it had become something more like self-penance, imposed upon yourself when you fell short. A reminder that you had to do better, a reset of sorts. You’ve learnt to play through the pain, the sting a welcome one.

Yes, a reset. That’s what you need now.

When Dottore hears music filtering down the hallway, his brows draw together. He’d given you express instruction not to practice today— the way you’d performed yesterday and the quiver in your wrists clearly indicated signs of a developing injury, damage to the nerves inevitable should you continue to overwork yourself. An old one worsened again, he deduces. He feels as if you are aware of this, so what are you doing?

He’s cleaned up from the laboratory earlier, not a single speck of blood staining his clothes and his usual gloves back on. His cloak remains unused, discarded somewhere in his office, boots clicking as his feet carry him towards your corridor.

The laugh he barks out sounds more like a scoff at your sheer lack of self-preservation when he hears the low, rich tones of a cello. He hasn’t witnessed your technique with your secondary instrument until now, but it’s evident from the way the music flows that you’re well-versed in the nuances of the piece that spills from the intersection between the bow and the strings.

But there’s something off about it— he frowns, pausing right outside the door as he listens, ever the scholar as he tries to parse the root cause of it.

The piece you’re playing is an adaptation of a relatively well-known folk song, no doubt arranged for the cello in your own time. You’re executing all the notes flawlessly and it’s pleasing to the ear, yet there’s an undercurrent of something haunting, an element that doesn’t fully belong with the nature of the music. Tormented. Guilty.

In spite of that, rather than discompose and aggravate, you reshape the music as your own, breaking it from comfortably familiar confines into a new thing, uniquely conflicting. Fascinating. It shifts him the same way that horror might if he had the capacity to feel fear deep enough for such an emotion— as it is, all it does is spark interest in the cavity of his chest, riveting him as wholly as the vision of Irminsul’s destruction had.

You nearly drop the bow when he steps in without so much as a knock or an announcement of his presence. Dottore’s eyes fall to you, and you stop playing as the atmosphere between you grows palpably more strained.

Your fingers are bleeding on the cello’s strings, scarlet streaking down the fingerboard.

For the second time this week, you find your practice disrupted and your wrist snatched up tightly in the Second Harbinger’s grasp, and you wonder vaguely if this is going to be a routine occurrence.

Unfortunately, when his fingers dig into your skin, a flash of pain shoots white-hot through your wrist and your expression cracks, a low exhale of pain leaving your lips. “Lord Harbinger—”

“What is this,” he demands, holding your bloodied hand up, the crisscross indentations of steel strings sore and tender to the touch.

You can only stare back at him, wordless. The debilitating numbness from earlier remains settled over your senses like a heavy blanket, and you feel like you’re watching the scene play out from an outside perspective, spectating your own dilemma.

Dottore’s sigh is ragged with vexation as he lets go of you and he mutters something to himself that sounds like ‘perhaps I went too far’, but you’re still rooted to the spot, wondering distantly if he would simply break the patronage agreement now and throw you out. You’d already overworked yourself to the point of an affliction on your wrist’s nervous system. What other use was there for you, other than—

“Composer.”

The image of your body on the dissection table flashes before your eyes, and you flinch.

“Lay your instrument down.”

Stiffly, you do as instructed, setting your cello and bow back in the case. You take the time to wipe the blood off the polished wood and steel before you latch it shut, and Dottore wonders at your lack of alarm over the whole affair, if this has happened before or if your current state is one of delayed shock.

Does it matter less to you if it’s your blood being spilled, your life offered up as the sacrificial lamb?

His lips press into a thin line, and you’re still mentally flipping though morbid scenarios of what he’s going to do, neck craned up to look at him.

“Give me your hand.”

What?

His voice is impassive and it takes you a moment to process the leather-clad palm before you, fingers open expectantly. Tentatively, you obey.

He inspects your wrists for a moment, turning them over before he reaches to grab your other hand, doing the same. Dottore clicks his tongue, dissatisfied— you assume it’s at you, and shrink back as best as you can with both your wrists captured in his grasp. “This won’t do.”

You sound more dejected than you mean to when you reply, lowering your eyes. “I apologise, Lord Harbinger.”

“Not that.”

Confused, you lapse into silence.

He grins suddenly, manic as ever, and it makes you shiver; no doubt he can feel the tremor through your entire body from where he has you in his hold. “Take my gloves off.”

You’re truly not sure how much more of this you can handle.

Dottore tilts his head at you, waiting.

You try desperately to keep your hands steady as you slide your fingers beneath the cuff of one glove and pull it off, but you likely fail anyway if the widening of his grin is any indication. Clearly, he enjoys unnerving you. The other follows suit in a moment, the brush of your skin against his igniting something that settles deep within you; deducing it as fear, you hold both his gloves in your hands with some uncertainty for a beat, depositing them in your lap with no other option on hand at the moment.

Then Dottore’s fingers are encircling your wrist once more, the pads of his thumbs digging into a spot right over your arteries. The sudden action sends a sharp flare of pain scorching through your nerves and you can’t bite back the quiet whimper that chokes itself from your throat at that, instinctively attempting to yank your hand away.

His grip only tightens and your vision goes white-hot in agony for a moment. “Relax,” he purrs, voice authoritative. You instantly go still, then blink at your involuntary compliance.

Dottore continues to massage your wrist, fingers shifting from varying pressure points and locating live nerve endings that send jolts of agony through you, the searing discomfort gradually subsiding as he works. You have no idea what he’s doing, but you feel some of the strain in your wrists dissipating, the ache less sharp.

He catches your look of bewilderment when he finally pauses, and this time when you feel his gaze on you, it feels sufficiently less terrifying. “Spit it out.”

“…What did you do?”

“A simple technique called myofascial release,” he states, matter-of-fact. “It helps to relax tendons in the wrist and reduce pressure on the median nerve.”

Your brows furrow, and he’s mildly incredulous. “This clearly isn’t the first time you’ve had a similar injury. Have you not undergone this before?”

“…No,” you reply slowly. “I was made to wear a splint for months until my wrist recovered.”

Dottore reads your silent concern and waves it away at once. “No need for that. As long as you come to me each day for treatment, you’ll be fine in merely a few weeks…”

He leans closer and you’re suddenly petrified when you remember how his mask sliced into your face the last time you were in such proximity. At the same time, you grow acutely aware of how he’s still holding your wrist in his, his fingers firm but no longer painful on your skin.

“… And refrain from playing any of your instruments for now, Composer.”

The Harbinger waits for you to argue, but you simply nod. “Yes.”

You’re half-terrified of asking your other question when he continues on. “I will not have you assist me in… procedures such as the one from earlier anymore, but I will find use for you elsewhere.”

The relief that blossoms in your chest is hesitant, but there nonetheless. “Thank you,” you say before you can stop yourself, the words rushing from you in a breath.

Dottore finally allows you to pull your wrist from his grasp, staring at you for a moment more before he pulls back.

“Dinner will be sent to your room tonight,” is all he says before he turns and leaves without another word.

You rotate your wrist tentatively, relieved when the sharp pain truly proves itself to have reduced. Already, you can’t wait to sink into the embrace of your bed and sleep the day off.

find me on ao3 here!

#dottore #il dottore #dottore x reader #genshin impact x reader #il dottore x reader #TCOTM #♡. kal's kitchen

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midethefangirl · 4 months

Text

out of control

tags: bireena, the closest you will get to a love confession, jealousy, one-sided tomas/sareena, jealousy, bi han being a dickhead, actually bi han as a warning tag himself, internal conflict (on sareena's part), spy!sareena, lin kuei!sareena, bi han not knowing how to properly express his emotions, fem!cyrax (her name is bontle in this fic), morning after (more like weeks after), sexual tension (kinda)

summary: (inspired by @ladybug023's spy!sareena headcanons) bi han finds himself strung out after that night at the shack and seeks closure. sareena, on the other hand, has to deal with her feelings for a certain cryomancer and the internal conflict she faces.

part ii of "i'm weak so what is wrong with that". part i can be found here.

word count => 2.5k words

also cross posted on AO3.

Not that he was not always in a bad mood but leaving Zhāofēi’s study room had him in a particular state of mind where he might actually murder anyone who was unfortunate to cross his path.

That was unusual as while most of his morning discussions with his father were marked by their constant disagreement on him taking on the role of grandmaster, this particular one was intense, to say the least.

Ever since coming back from the Tengu, he had noticed how sour his temperament got and he could only pin it on one person and one person only.

How can one woman affect you so greatly?

A huff of annoyance escaped him as he walked down the thankfully empty hallway. It was as if the elder gods had chosen to keep any unsuspecting Lin Kuei initiate out of his way today.

A small unnoticeable smile fell on his face until it dropped once his ears picked up a voice from one of the rooms.

He was so quick to turn his head, in recognition of Tomas’ voice squealing at something like he was a teenage girl. That was soon accompanied by that lilt he had come to missed.

What was she doing with him? Of all people .

He had no time for questions as he followed in the direction. It seemed to be coming from Bontle’s room.

What are they doing in Cyrax’s room? Was the next question that dominated the cryomancer’s mind as that now-familiar emotion reared its ugly head.

Soon, he was close to the room, opting to stay hidden and away from where any of them could see him. He hated how pathetic he looked right now, eavesdropping on a conversation that probably had nothing to do with him.

“-woah, it’s cool, isn’t it?” That was Tomas, his voice tinged with child-like wonder. At that point, Bi Han decided he was going to also observe and there she was.

Sareena .

She had that look he had never seen before - like she was just discovering something she had never seen before.

“What magic is this?” She asked, her fingers going through the holographic image.

“Oh, this?” Bi Han’s head snapped towards the other direction and that was when he noticed Bontle, her elbows on the workbench as she watched the other two admire her new invention.

“Sektor and I have spent years building this prototype,” she continued. “It is not magic by the way.”

A heady chuckle escaped Sareena as she toyed with the control, causing the hologram to rotate.

“This looks like those things I see in those American movies of yours, Tomas.”

What the-? A frown was now etched on the cryomancer’s face. She watches those stupid movies with this fool?!

It was then his treacherous mind took him to a certain dark path. Was she also sleeping with him? Was that why she acted like that night at the shack did not exist?

“Those ones are CGI effects,” Bontle chipped in. “This one here is the real deal. Sektor and I are still working on this, it is just a beta for now.”

“Would Sareena and I be treated to seeing more of your inventions again?” Tomas asked, and it was at this point that Bi Han decided he was making his presence known as he stepped into the room.

It took a few seconds before the three would realize that they had an extra presence in the room with them. Bontle immediately stood up straight, a wide smile plastered on her face as she acknowledged him.

“Bi Han!” The dark-skinned assassin greeted. “We did not expect to have you here. We were just-.”

He seemed to be distracted as his eyes fell on Sareena who carefully placed the holographic projector on the workbench. It was as if she was doing everything within her power to avoid making eye contact with him but it was all a matter of minutes when her eyes finally met his.

His eyes did not miss the way Tomas’ hand was at her back and Bi Han could only clench his fists when his jealousy came slithering in again. He was starting to not appreciate the way the typhokinetic was getting handsy with Sareena. Or the fact that she goes into his room to participate in such foolish drivel .

“Is anything the matter, Bi Han?” The gray ninja just had to open his mouth and worsen his already sour mood.

But, for some reason, his gaze did not waver from Sareena’s, holding eyes contact for as long as possible. Their communication required no words as his eyes said all it needed to send across to her.

“The training grounds at 7.”

He watched as her eyes widened, it started with shock before finally taking the form of latent rage.

“Today was supposed to be my day-off!”

If she was any other Lin Kuei initiate, he would have put her in her place but her defiance sparked something dark within him and he would entertain that for as long as possible if he had to.

“You would defy my commands?” He questioned, his gravelly voice carrying a threatening undertone with it and his eyes watched as she seemed to battle whether to stand her ground or comply. They might have spent a night of passion together but she would not dare do that, right?

In his peripheral vision, Bontle and Tomas exchanged cautious looks between each other. Everything about their exchanged glances screamed worry for his protégée as they observed their interaction silently.

Time seemed to slowly move before Sareena finally made her decision, her shoulders now relaxed but that hardened stare did not leave her face.

“No, Shifu, I would not. I will be there.”

“Is there anything going on between you and Bi Han?” Tomas had asked once he was sure the cryomancer was out of earshot.

“I was about to ask the same,” Bontle had asked. “I could have cut through that tension with a knife.”

If only they knew…

She was not the one to kiss and tell, not in the Netherrealm and especially not here. She preferred to keep her escapades to herself, they were personal, after all.

However, she had not expected Bi Han to be the one who would want to talk about it. Why else had he asked her to be at their usual training room at a time where everyone was supposed to wind down at the common area?

Here she was, with Tomas by her side as they walked down the stony pavement to where the training grounds stood at. The 6’5 tall Czech had her arm linked to his, holding her and Sareena could not help but wonder how things would have gone if she reciprocated his feelings instead.

He was a genuine gentleman and had been among the first to welcome her into the Lin Kuei, even going as far as inviting her to sit with him and the rest of the group during her first week.

Even after telling him that she did not feel the same way about him, he remained her friend. And right now, she appreciated his presence - it kept her grounded for the time being as the thought of being alone with Bi Han had her feeling jittery.

It just had to be cliche that she found herself pining after the cryomancer. Like those classic American movies, the good girl pining after the bad boy .

Who was she kidding? Maybe she and Bi Han shared more similarities than she gave herself credit for. She was no good girl, considering the reason why she was in this clan in the first place.

How would they feel when the truth comes out? When they finally find out that I am a spy and a demon? That I lied to them?

Ever since that night at the shack, those thoughts grew more frequent. She had fallen in too deep and now she was scrambling her way to get out of this mess. She had to find a way to extend this lie for as long as possible, even if it meant groveling before Quan Chi-.

“Sareena.”

She felt herself snap out of her reverie, her eyes meeting the dark brown hardwood door. Tomas stood by her side, a reassuring smile on his face.

“I guess this is where I leave, right?” His hand reached to scratch lightly at the back of his neck. His eyes seemed to read that he was reluctant to leave her with Bi Han all alone and for good reasons.

Every interaction between the two assassins felt like walking around eggshells, one single misstep and things would go down to the Netherrealm.

“Yeah, thank you, Tomas,” she said softly, prompting him to leave, yet, he lingered. “I’ll be fine.”

“Are you sure?”

Letting out a sigh, she nodded in the affirmative.

“I will see you tomorrow at breakfast then,” he replied, his body turning in the opposite direction and she watched as his figure grew smaller in the distance.

Now facing the door, Sareena’s heart rate accelerated as her hand reached forward for the knob. She hesitated midway, eying the knob when the door opened suddenly and a hand reached out, pulling her into the room.

She yelped and winced the moment her back met the wall. She was definitely leaving this place with a terrible bruise on her back and she had only one person to blame for that.

This asshole-.

“Took you long enough.”

A low growl erupted from the back of her throat as she pushed against him, “What the fuck, Bi Han?!”

He did not budge, his body holding her against the wall and it had her wondering for a moment: how long had he been within these four walls waiting patiently for Tomas to leave her alone so that he could manhandle her?

The way he has been doing these past two-going-on-three years?

She hated his stealth and all that came with it and she could already sense a lecture from him on how she should always be on alert.

“Why was he here with you?”

The hell-?!

“I owe you no explanation, Bi Han,” she replied, her eyes blazing with fury. He had quite the audacity bringing her out here and tossing her like she was a little rag doll. This was one of the many times she cursed the limitations of her human disguise.

If she was in her demonic form, she would not be the only one leaving this room with a bruising back.

She could already see the moment the cryomancer’s features morphed into that familiar emotion which manifested each time he had his authority challenged.

His eyes darkened and his grip on her tightened, an obvious sign that he was doing everything in his power to restrain himself.

Yet, it was not enough to stop his next words which came spilling.

“Are you fucking him too?” His accusation revealing his jealousy. “Is that why you act as if that night never existed? You’re fucking Tomas?”

Her eyes widened in realization, it became more obvious why he called her here. He wanted closure.

The urge to laugh at the ridicule of this situation was almost overpowering. If only he knew…

But, watching the cryomancer lose control was the entertainment in itself and what were demons known for? Mischief and she could only indulge in her nature for the time being.

Her eyes held that mirth and she could see how it affected him, his brows furrowed as his eyes narrowed and his jaw clenched.

“Jealous, are we, Sub Zero?” her voice held a playful tone mixed with a tinge of the need to push as many buttons of his as possible.

He might be the future grandmaster of the Lin Kuei but she held all the control in her hands.

“What the fuck are you playing at, Sareena?” His voice was now a dangerous whisper and her heart raced at the way he said her name.

She was definitely playing with fire.

“I don’t know, Bi Han. You are the one who is almost losing it, so you tell me,” she shot back at him, holding his gaze. “We slept together for one night and you act like we’re suddenly exclusive.”

“What if I do not want that night to be a one-time thing? What if I want us to be exclusive?”

His admission had her heart skipping a beat, it had her momentarily stunned as her lips parted slightly, her mouth now dry.

It was his turn to look away, a faint blush adorning his cheeks, his eyes avoiding hers as he let go of her, stepping away, a frown now etched on his face.

Her fingers came to touch her arms where he had gripped her earlier, her eyes observing the man standing a few feet away from her.

Was that his way of telling her that he liked her?

“Bi Han-,” her voice was now soft but he turned away from her.

A groan of frustration escaped him, “I cannot stop thinking about that night, Sareena. I have done everything to forget about it and yet-.”

His confession was left hanging in the air and her heart was racing in her chest. The tension in the room had shifted to something else, the air was electric and her breathing became labored.

What was this?

Bi Han snorted again as he paced before turning back to her. His cold hands cupped her cheeks and Sareena felt herself shiver slightly.

“What enchantment have you used on me?” His voice was a rough whisper and she could only shake her head.

How could she answer that question when she had no idea?

The next thing she felt were his lips on hers, gentle and tentative. It took a moment before he pulled away, his forehead now against hers.

“I- I do not know why I feel this way yet I would give everything up if it meant being with you.”

At that, Sareena’s eyes flew open to gaze at Bi Han and it was no joke at all. Knowing the kind of man he was, this was probably the closest to a love confession he would make and it unsettled her.

She was going to break his heart once he found out the truth. Quan Chi might not have shown up yet but she knew it was a matter of time.

She shook her head, pulling away from his embrace.

“Don’t- don’t do that because of me, Bi Han. I- I am not worth all that,” she tried to tell him, her eyes avoiding his.

"That is not going to change my mind,” he said with an air of finality.

Sareena could only let out a humorless laugh, she was not going to change his mind at this rate. She nodded.

Maybe she could keep up with this for as long as she could. She could try to buy more time and confess the truth to Bi Han. In this moment, she could not let him know the truth. No matter how badly she wanted him to. Maybe another time.

I am not really satisfied with how the ending came to be but I hope it is good to your liking. also, Bi Han may be a bit ooc but hear me out, he would not be the type to outrightly express his feelings and shit like that. and yeah, I added a one-sided Tomas/Sareena bit cause why not? that being said, constructive criticism is always welcome.

tagging: @livingdeadgirly

#sareena #bi han #bireena #bi han x sareena #don't like don't read #that tag was specifically for antis who would happen to stumble across this #anyway here is the promised second part

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thecomfywriter · 2 years

Text

Writing Tension

Hey! It’s your girl— @thecomfywriter— back with another post. Apparently, an anticipated post :) Fr though, before we start, I want to thank you all for the warm welcome and kind comments since coming back to this account. It makes me really happy to see these posts help people, and hopefully I can continue to be a resource for you guys, or even share my own works too! I started doing writing prompts on my instagram, so that’s always an option.

Anyways, today’s post is about writing tension. Perhaps one of the greatest devices you can use as a writer, as it allows you to utilize the narrative to grip your reader, immerse them into your story, and have them truly feel for your characters and the events. Because of its power, it's also not the easiest thing to navigate. Thus, this post is here to help, as rather a launching point or hopefully a guide on how to implement and work tension into your story.

Before we get started, here are all my socials. Do pop on, give it a visit, spread the love. And if you find my posts particularly helpful and you want to show your appreciation, you can tip this post &/or buy me a coffee using the link down below.

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Tension is a subdevice of foreshadowing, in which readers are made to anticipate the worst occurring and/or face a conflict. Tension adds mood, depth, atmosphere, and engagement with your story. It is a tactic employed to cause emotional distress to your readers and characters alike. There are multiple different facets to developing tension successfully, each with its own purpose in crafting your perfect narrative. Not every story is going to need all of these to build tension but every good story with proper tension that leaves your readers unable to put the book down because, “what’s going to happen next” will have at least more than one.

Conflict:

The foundational aspect of tension is conflict. Your character is experiencing a tense chapter, or the narrative has an increased sense of tension in it because there has been an introduction of conflict, whether that be through internal or external forces. Internal conflict may result in emotional distress and the reader's anticipation of when those bottled up, unresolved emotions will come to fruition and make a muck of character relations (as an example). Or, it can cause the retrograde degeneration of a character’s arc. Meanwhile, external conflict gives your characters a focus, an opposition to combat. Conflict is a natural breeding ground for tension because it festers resistance and opposition. Depending on the type of conflict within your story, the effect and consequences will be different. However, some things to bear in mind for each are such:

Internal conflict:

Internal conflict is the idea of “man vs. self,” in which your character is their own antagonist. When dealing with internal conflict, understanding the character’s motivations (or lack thereof), their personality, their morality/values, and their perspective is key to understanding their reaction and thus the outcome of this conflict. Personally, I love using internal conflict for building tension, because it creates a sense of dichotomy and indecision that puts the reader in a sense of discomfort. It’s powerful because it's uncomfortable, and it's uncomfortable because it's confrontational. It requires the characters to face the most undesirable, the worst, deepest, darkest, most heinous parts of themselves and question how it aligns or rejects against their self-perception. When writing internal conflict, the tension should arise predominantly from the character’s emotions and their struggle, putting them at a crossroads within themselves. Here’s a brief outline of each of the types of internal conflict:

Religion/faith: your character is questioning their spiritual stance

Desires: these can be regular old desires or sexual ones, but your character is left repressing or struggling to accept/control their untamed/scandalous/unacceptable desires

Morality: your character is questioning/forced to confront their sense of morality (or lack thereof), usually inspired by an external conflict

Identity: your character is attempting &/or struggling to form an image of themselves OR they are struggling to accept their self-image, typically in contrast to the image/identity they desire or have been prescribed to

I want to do another post on identity because my sister made this brilliant presentation on the types of identity for her global health class and I think it can really be helpful in understanding how to forge your character’s identity in respect to the rest of the story/society

Love/guilt: these are two of the most powerful emotions a character can feel, specifically emotions that drive action, which is why I grouped them together. Also because they’re often connected, whether it be the internal conflict of rejecting love, repressing it, being in denial, trying to force or reject it, or feeling the guilt of lost love, unrequited love, unethical love, or hurting a lover. Or, of course, the entire ballpark of dealing with guilt itself. Guilt is the needle for a person’s moral compass; remember that when exploring the dynamics of a character's internal struggle when it comes to guilt, regret and shame.

Existential: the character must face themselves and come to a decision about their purpose/the meaning of life. This type of conflict typically involves an internal struggle against what the character knows or is prescribed to believe versus what they themselves truly find meaning in.

Interpersonal: kind of like identity and existential, interpersonal conflict is a struggle in which your character opposes their role or their identity and its place within a larger context. For example, your character grappling with their sense of identity versus the societal norms and expectations is considered interpersonal because it goes beyond their own self-image, but instead of how their identity contributes to a larger scale.

External Conflict:

This type of conflict is your classic, “man vs other,” in which your character is opposing a force beyond themselves. When dealing with external conflict, setting up a basis for motivation for each party and allowing your readers to understand why these motivations clash is key in developing character intentions, which keeps your story consistent and is also a helpful reference tool for areas where you want to add tension. There are also a plethora of external conflict types, which I will outline here:

Antagonist: this is a character who doesn’t necessarily have to be a villain, but they do have to be in opposition to your character. For example, your character’s antagonist can be the tyrant who conquers and enslaves tribes and cities of these ancient lands, or they can be the crush of your character’s love interest. The crush didn’t do anything wrong. They’re not a bad person. They’re just in the way of the protagonist’s goals in the story, which in this story, would be to woo and romance their love interest.

Nature: natural disasters. The world is ending. Radiation. Alternate planets with weird, mystical, and dangerous wildlife. Surviving the outdoors.

Society: character is combating against society, whether it be norms, authority, or the community itself.

Technology: character against technology that has gone too far. Typically in sci-fi, futuristic settings. Think AI, robots, nuclear bombs/weapons/warfare… the list goes on. You can be so creative with this one, I love it. Technically, Mary Shelley’s “Frankenstein” was character vs. technology.

Fate: character is trying to prevent, oppose, or deter a certain inevitability or destiny they’ve been prescribed to. Think of oracles or prophecies, maybe even soulmates for romance books. I always like to think of Oedipus as the classic example.

For example, character X has lost their father in a lynching after his father spoke up against the corrupt government that was leaching off their already struggling and vulnerable village. Thus, X has a strong vehemence towards the corruption, the government, and specifically the authority + everyone involved in the lynching. His motivation lies in his grief (which, in it of itself is an internal conflict, as he struggles to process the traumatic incident and cope with the violent and public murder of his parent) and thus may motivate his desire to dismantle the government and abdicate the leader that ordered the lynching to begin with. In this example, there are 2 external conflicts. Conflict 1 is the authority who ordered the lynching (antagonist) and conflict 2 is the society that endorsed the corruption that his father was rebelling against to begin with. Your character’s motivation may be to honour his father’s memory by dismantling both corrupt regimes, and his antagonist's motivation may be to silence any acts of rebellion in order to maintain governorship, power, and retain authority. These motivations, when outlined, are in direct opposition to each other, and being able to recognize that can help you as the writer facilitate scenarios in which those motivations and oppositions are exacerbated. By forcing your characters to make a difficult decision that reveals their intentions or puts their intentions on blast, you create tension in the story (i.e. if X had to choose between telling the authorities of a near-broken dam that would flood their village to save the innocents at the cost of increasing their hold on the population by embellishing their reputation, or allow the dam to break, killing the innocents and forcing the authority to go under higher investigation that would rule them out of power. What does your character value more?)

Building the atmosphere:

Okay, lemme explain what I mean about this because I feel like this is a common trope in horror that always has me shitting BRICKS. Basically, there are elements of horror (that's the next point I’ll be explaining, fret not), in which one of them is the overdescription of a scene. Essentially, I like to think of it as, say your character is in the middle of a super tense scene. They’re alone in the house late at night. They live in a cabin wood area, no neighbours for a couple of kilometers. Their phone—blasted! They forgot to put it on charging. The hairs on their spine are rising. An odd sense of urgency has replaced their relaxing movie night when multiple creaking floorboards sound from upstairs. Your character slithers into the kitchen, grabbing the first knife they see, trying to make as little noise as possible as they slowly trek up the stairs. One hand is on the railing, the other raised with their knife ready to stab. Their eyes are darting. Their senses are heightened. Shadows from outside cast onto each step in non-symmetrical patterns, making each step more difficult to see than the last. The top of the stairs is a void. The wooden banister is the only thing illuminated by the shreds of moonlight, and it reflects as though polished. What is that? On the railing? Why does it seem wet?

Your character checks their hand, realizing it too has been trailing over a sticky fluid. Sticky and viscous. They can’t see in the shadows. They don’t want to look down, even for the second it would take to check their hand. Do they look? Do they keep going forward?

A creak sound behind them. They spin around, slicing the knife into the air. The whoosh of it cutting empty space rattles their bones. It was only their own foot behind them. Though, when they look back up towards the banister, they notice the railing isn’t reflecting as much as it used to. Whatever liquid had stained it had matted to dullness.

This is stupid. I should be leaving. Your character pivots swiftly, rushing down the stairs, when suddenly, a firm hand covers their mouth and yanks them back.

In that uncalled for example, the environment is built through perceiving the entire scene in the character’s frantic and limited vision. We are following their frantic eyes, processing all the information and observations they make, whether they make conclusions with the observations, or set them aside for later use. I dunno what it is about this device, but it gives me the heebie jeebies everytime because DAMN stop describing the shadows in the corner of the room and the chills up your arms at the brisk wind that shouldn’t be indoors considering you locked all the windows. I dunno, that kind of writing puts me on edge, and that’s exactly the point.

Elements of Horror:

Briefly, I will outline some of the elements of horror and perhaps make a more detailed post on it separately, if y'all would like that.

Overdescription

Being vague with crucial details (limiting the characters and readers POV)

Loss of senses

Overstimulation (creates a sense of anxiety)

Emphasis on a character’s reaction to the events around them // bodily fear (the pit in her stomach clawed into her chest, lodging itself in her throat. A sick acidity overcame her in waves as the sharpness of his fingernails traced along her collarbones. His hot breath feathered the cold skin of her neck, rendering her paralyzed within his clutches)

Varied sentence structure:

The actual construction of your sentences influences the tone and fluidity of your writing // the scene. General rule of thumb: if you want to draw out a scene, use longer, connected sentences to build anticipation, anxiety, and atmosphere. On the contrary, if you want to blast your readers with a quicker, faster pace, short sentences can jar your readers and give the “loss of sensation” effect to help stun them.

Personalization:

This is the idea of creating stakes for your characters by making whatever event is occurring to them personal. When thinking of personalization, the key questions to ask yourselves are:

What does (character) have to lose?

Why is losing (thing being lost) significant to (character)/the narrative?

How will (character) change as a person/the narrative change its course if (thing being lost) was lost?

Why is (insert character goal) worth the risk of losing Y?

What other risks is (character) willing to take for (insert character goal)? How do these risks interact with each other?

What are the consequences of these risks/decisions/actions? Consider emotional and narrative consequences.

By personalizing each risk to your characters, you are upping the stakes of their goals, thus increasing the tension because there is more of a gamble to it now. NOTE: in order for this to work, your readers must truly believe that real consequences exist in your story. Not half-assed. Real, proper, committed consequences. Don’t give your character this deadly illness only to immediately present them with a cure. Don’t give them this life altering injury and have them heal within a week. Do NOT give them the easy way out. If you want to increase your stakes, show your readers you are willing to make your characters hurt. Show them that real consequences exist. Your characters, no matter how darling they are to you, should not be immune to the laws of your world. When in doubt, always remember the genius case of Ned Stark— he was the classic hero protagonist who everyone loved and rooted for. And then he died, and he stayed dead, because the story had consequences and he took unforgivable risks. An added weight, a sense of gravity was added to every character’s decision and the reader's perception of safety after that, because if Ned wasn’t safe, no one was.

Readers on edge:

Taking away your reader's sense of certainty is one surefire way to build a source of tension and anxiety, as it removes the sense of security that allows them to otherwise remain comfortable in the narrative. By decreasing the sense of security, you increase the tension within the narrative, allowing it to drive the plot forward and increase reader engagement. It also forces the reader to question everything. Will they make it out alive? How did she escape? Who was on the stairs? What was the mysterious reflecting liquid? What happens next?

If you are able to keep your reader asking these kinds of questions, you are able to maintain their apprehension, which seeks to lock them in and truly sell your story as immersive.

How do you pull this off? When building tense scenes, consider yourself in the character's shoes. What in that situation would make you feel secure? What would make you feel like you were aware of what was going on? That you could rely on your wit and foresight to help you in your quest? What would give you confidence?

Now take that away.

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Anyways y’all, I’m spent. Hope this helps! Feel free to suggest more posts through my asks and inbox. Until then, I’ll be working on some super in-depth posts for my buymeacoffee page.

Happy Writing! :)

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