#i want like 6 the car songs if possible. who does he think he is
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Alex Turner opens up about The Car, Arctic Monkeys' 20th anniversary album
The frontman of the British band that performs at Primavera Sound, in São Paulo, invests in more abstract lyrics in new album
Published October 16 2022, by Rodrigo Salem
Alex Turner is not satisfied with the lighting in the room chosen as the setting for our interview. It's a small, cozy hipster hotel in the Los Feliz neighborhood of Los Angeles, one of those above a cafe with tables occupied by young people at the computer, and no lines at cash registers that don't accept cash.
The frontman of Arctic Monkeys, the biggest rock band to come out of the UK in the last 20 years, flips the switches until he finds the perfect balance of light. "Is this okay for you?" he asks, but doesn't seem to care too much about the answer.
Turner likes to have complete control over his environment. "Where do you want to sit? This will be the best place, right?" he asks, coffee in hand, already standing in front of a small beige table below the lamp that insisted on not emanating the adequate light.
Shy to the point of never completing a full sentence, as if his mouth didn't keep up with his fast brain, Turner is acutely aware of his obsession with control and attention to detail, something that has only grown bigger in the last few years at the helm of the band. But the singer, guitarist and songwriter lived something different in the creation of The Car, the group's seventh album, which will be released worldwide this week.
After composing the piano demos alone for much of the pandemic, he was reunited with the rest of the band over the summer of last year, in a secluded house that was part of a 12th-century monastery in Suffolk, on the east coast of England.
"We hadn't done that since the first album. I had extra film rolls and I took my 16mm camera to film everything and keep myself busy during the recording. At first, I just wanted to record the memory, but it seemed to help in the work environment, because I stepped out of the process a bit and gave everyone more space," he says.
"James [Ford, record producer] was delighted, because I wasn't looking over his shoulder all the time and being a twat."
The musician's hobby as a filmmaker was not the only novelty in the three weeks of work in the makeshift studio, complete with a piano borrowed from a resident there and the technological arsenal brought in from London. The period was essential for Arctic Monkeys to remember that they are still a rock group formed by friends.
"We had a lot of laughs and watched the Euro Cup together. It was important to have that band energy again," says Turner, revealing that Body Paint, The Car's latest single, only took its final form because of this camaraderie. "The distorted guitar at the end just came about because I wanted to do that solo with them. It sounds obvious, but being together changes the dynamics of how I play."
Ironically, the album's main theme seems to circle around characters that don't seem to fit the environment they're in. In Body Paint itself, which wouldn't be out of place in one of George Martin's orchestrated productions for The Beatles, Turner sings that he's "keeping on [his] costume and calling it a writing tool."
Jet Skis On The Moat, played on a sultry guitar and with a broken rhythm reminiscent of U2's The Playboy Mansion, brings a Hollywood psychedelic mood—"jet skis on the moat / they filmed everything in CinemaScope, but this is the last time you will ride them, though".
"I was imagining this perception of us living like rock stars in a fantasy castle on a mountain, riding jet skis, disconnected from everything," says Turner.
In I Ain't Quite Where I Think I Am, he seems to describe a strange trip on a luxury yacht off the coast of France, a country where he usually goes with his girlfriend, French singer Louise Verneuil, since he moved back to England from Los Angeles. "I spend less time here, but I love this city. It's where I have my friends," he says.
Extremely protective of his privacy, Alex Turner does not confirm any theories that could refer to his life beyond music. However, he admits that feeling like a fish out of water is one of the themes of the record. "I've definitely written this time about someone who doesn't fit in," he says as he pulls out of his green jacket two folded sheets of paper filled with his lyrics and assorted notes.
I question the reason for keeping this material around and the singer lets his guard down. "I think that this way I can have these conversations more easily, and stay on the same level as other people. You've read the lyrics, listened to the record, and I thought I should do the same to meet you in the middle," he says, soon bringing back up his good-humored defenses. "And it also serves to intimidate people."
Not that he seems to want to intimidate anyone. Turner can barely look up, more concerned with focusing on some object and finding the right words for his answers. Keeping the lyrics in your pocket serves to rediscover the words of the songs.
One of the most brilliant songwriters of modern British rock and someone who has managed to portray the yearnings and feelings of an entire millennial generation, he says his lyrics come out of the space between the conscious and the unconscious.
In The Car, they seem even more abstract. "I love leaving space for lyrics not to be fully understood and to become more interesting as the years go by. I like to explore things that are difficult to talk about."
Does that mean that Alex Turner, who, two decades ago, rehearsed in a garage with Jamie Cook on guitar, Andy Nicholson on bass, later replaced by Nick O'Malley, and Matt Helders on drums, in Sheffield, is finally noticing the inevitable passage of time?
"Funny, it's hard to accept that it's been 20 years," he says. "But we're alive and active. That happens a lot when I'm singing the old songs now. I remember something, not necessarily the lyrics, but the environment, a person and the sensations of the past."
A rich past, we must add. Arctic Monkeys have gone through several phases in these two decades. It began with the confessional hip-hop-enamored rock of the first two albums, a formula that propelled the group into the stratosphere of fame. It gained weight with the stoner rock of Josh Homme of Queens of the Stone Age on 2009's Humbug and the stadium hard rock of 2013's AM. And it culminated in the journey away from Earth in 2018's jazzy Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino.
The Car continues the sonic exploration of their previous work, but brings guitars back to the songs and a Turner interested in using his voice as an instrument. "I don't know if Alex from 20 years ago would like this sound," he wonders. "Secretly, I wanted something along those lines then, but it wasn't within my reach at the time. On second thought, I think he would like it. But if he wouldn't like it, then fuck it," he jokes.
He admits that he changed his way of looking at music and even composing. On previous albums, he wrote the lyrics and then thought of the melody. The music now comes first.
"I made an effort to put the lyrics in sync with a melody that gives me permission to use certain words," says the musician. "I didn't focus on that in the past, I think it started on AM, when I started to change the lyrics as I was influenced by the sound in the studio."
Back on stage since a few weeks ago, Turner believes the pandemic has changed the relationship between band and audience. "The first time we performed was powerful," he says. "There's a new energy that encourages me. I'm trying not to behave the same way on stage. I think some of that comes from the younger crowd."
Brazil is going to feel this in a few days. Arctic Monkeys closes the first day of Primavera Sound, in São Paulo, on November 5th, already oiling the show with a new repertoire. "When we arrive in Brazil, I want to test two new songs and leave some old ones behind," says the singer, who already says that the next album may come out faster than expected after the long gestation of The Car.
Unable to play shows, the group spent a year polishing up the album in post-production. "We had more time to work on the record and I like to think that this had a positive influence on the final result, as we had more space to hone, think and fight for certain ideas", says Turner. "I love the idea of doing something different, like writing, recording and releasing in a week. Maybe it's a fun idea for the next project."
#translating this was a delight! i used to want to be a translator this brought me back wow#also the jet skis lyrics are not it okay i had to guess from portuguese i did the closest thing that seemed to rhyme#arctic monkeys#alex turner#the car#interview#*#i hope that he doesn't mean i ain't quite as one of the new ones#i want like 6 the car songs if possible. who does he think he is#also he'd kill himself if he had to work on a project for less than like 6 months lol#the bit about the lights is so vnjdnjfvnjncjd#also the thing about meeting the interviewers in the middle 🥺 i have a post from a couple year back saying how he refuses to do that.#i used those exact words. i.#he's growing and trying and proving me wrong im so
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Fic Finder
March 5th
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1. I’m pretty sure the fic im looking for is a one shot, but it’s been so long I can’t remember: LXC brings WWX (who he’s been teaching musical cultivation) to LQR and is like “he’s never learned this song, watch” and plays something. Then gestures to WWX who plays it perfectly from memory. LXC gestures to him while looking at LQR like “see?” and LQR is impressed
FOUND! multitude Chapter 13: good teacher lan qiren by bunny093 (bamf/genius wwx, the lans are better are sect-ing here, lightly based on a lilo&stitch scene, not yunmeng jiang friendly)
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2. Hello! Looking for a specific fic, at some point wwx transmigrates or reincarnates into the modern world where he is a ceo (?) and was trained by a teacher his whole life about sword fighting etc, and then he eventually gets his memories back and invents a way (i believe it was a device) to dimension/time travel to get back home. @vulpeculatee
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3. Hi, I'm looking for a Wangxian fanfic, where Wei Wuxian is in the Lan sect and he grows mushrooms. I just know that mushrooms were an important part of the fanfic, there was a scene where the other sects followed the Lan disciples to see where they bought the mushrooms. Thanks.
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4. hello! i just finished rereading "switched" (wwx switched with xz) but its ending was wwx finding out that he's pregnant. i remember that there's a part two of that where he gave birth in modern world, and they even cut their own hair but i cant find it. does anybody know where can i find it? or maybe im talking about two different story? im not really sure. thankyouuuuuu!
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5. good day! for the enxt fic finder, do u guys know tha time travel fic where wwx came back during the lectures then he let himself fall from the cliff where lwj was there and told him to let go? thank u in advance!
FOUND!🔒 Without end by barisan (M, 69k, WIP, WangXian, Time Travel, Suicide Attempt, Hurt/Comfort, Depressed WWX, Good Uncle LQR, Bad Parent YZY, Bad Parent JFM, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, PTSD, Panic Attacks, Yunmeng Jiang bashing, Sentient Resentful energy, Medical inaccuracies)
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6. Making a deep dive into my AO3 history is an Exhausting prospect right now, so I must turn to the hive mind. Three fics I'm looking for rn.
A) Meng Yao is running an errand and finds his car beset by a swarm of bees! 🐝🐝🐝 Cue LXC to the rescue.
B) Wei Ying is out on a first date and it's going poorly. Lan Zhan overhears. Tea facts are relevant. 🍵
C) Post-canon case fic, where the case is a mysterious energy that some people can see/sense and some cannot. Can't remember whether WWX just happened to bump into LWJ+ducklings or if they were already hanging out, but the two of them figure their shit out whilst investigating. I think there was a garden involved. And energy-induced kissing (possibly even sex?). @linderel
6A)
FOUND! save the bees (ride a beekeeper) by Ariaste (T, 4k, LXC/JGY, modern, Fluff and Humor, Meet-Cute, Bees, Flirting)
6B)
FOUND!🔒 Heaven, Wait by sunflowersfield (T, 2k, wangxian, Modern, Fluff, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Neurodiversity, Falling In Love, Getting Together, Happy Ending, First Dates, First Kiss, Hyperfixations, Strangers to Lovers, Meet-Cute, The bad date with the original character is brief and he never sees that guy again)
6C)
FOUND! Not What We May Be by brooklinegirl (E, 29k, WangXian, Post-Canon, Mutual Pining, Bedsharing, casefic, Hurt/Comfort, background Jingyi/Sizhui)
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7. Hi. Hope you are well.
I'm trying (and failing!) to find a WangXian fix I read years ago on Ao3.
From what I remember, Wei WuXian was a Captive of the Wen and kept in a high tower where is tortured and chained with a small window and Lan Zhan also gets captured and put in the same cell of Wei WuXian.
Lan Zhan is there when the Wen soldiers drag Wei WuXian away for torture and they bond. Later Lan Zhan finds out Wei WuXian is a Phoenix and the Wens want his tears. Wen Qing and Wen Ning are his only friends.
Wei WuXian helps Lan Zhan escape and Lan Zhan has to convince the cultivation world to save Wei WuXian but by the time they reach the Wens, they see that Wei WuXian lost control of the Phoenix and Lan Zhan calms him down amidst the fire.
I also remember the fic mentionimg that a Phoenix meant Goodluck.
Thsnk you in advance!
FOUND? a thousand hills, no birds in flight | 千山鳥飛絕 by defractum (nyargles) (E, 26k, WangXian, Mythology, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon adjacent setting, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort)
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8. thank u so much for all u do! i actually have two fics i’m searching for! i remember reading both in 2021 so i believe that narrows things down!
A) first one is canon divergence from qiongqi path, i remember that wwx almost dies but puts his consciousness into a paperman and his body is somewhat preserved by wen qing till they can find a way to heal him and then transfer his consciousness back but they pretend he died to the other sects (i remember they even go check his body) i remember the wen remnants go to lotus pier pretending to be related to ppl from yunmeg and jzx survives. the whole mess with mxy and the summoning array happens but it fucks it up a little since wwx isn’t actually dead and he becomes something like a spirit/ghost for a while and ends up meeting lwj by accident when he’s taming mxy back to lotus pier. they manage to heal his body and he transfers himself back in and they all live happily ever after.
B) the second one is a fic in a fic series of wangxian having more children and being very domestic that includes past lwj changing places with present lwj for a day and he basically spends the day with wwx, they go farming he helps with the kids, they see lsz for a time, unfortunately that’s all i can remember from it.
8A)
FOUND? 🔒 something like by silversshadow (T, 69k, wangxian, Major Character Death, Canon Divergence, Everyone Lives AU, Temporary Character Death)
8B)
FOUND? These Two Most Powerful by stiltonbasket (G, 4k, wangxian, LXC & LWJ, Married Life, Family Feels, Parenthood, Temporary Amnesia, Time Travel, it's amnesia but it feels like time travel to LWJ, wangxian have more babies, and they are the cutest buns, not your average amnesia fic? there's no drama here tbh, just soft husbands carrying on with fatherhood, And loving each other, Mild Angst, Happy Ending)
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9. Hello! I am looking for some help to find a fic. It's a story where Wei Wuxian becomes the ruler of afterlife essentially. All the characters who died before him are there but he has no memory of his past. The only way to get his memory was to go to earth and retrieve them(?). The last chapter I remember is MXY calling him, allowing him to return to the earthly realm.
Please and thank you 😊 @myblurryreality
Thank you for the suggestion but that is not it, unfortunately. The one I'm looking for starts out with Jiang Yanli and Jin Zixuan being in this after life city. They had to struggle for a bit because there death offerings(?) were delayed. Wen Qing was a doctor in the town and helped heal Jin Zixuan from an injury at one point. The reason everyone's offerings were delayed was because there was a new Ruler, who ended up being Wei Wuxian. He had absolutely no memory of anyone, but allowed Jiang Yanli to visit him. He would hear a song (Wangxian) played as a tribute(?) but didn't know who played it.
NOT FOUND!🔒 A Secret Never Shared by Vrishchika (T, 28k, wangxian, Canon Divergence, frankencanon, Pining, Soft LWJ, Deity WWX, BAMF WWX, Alternate Universe, LSZ is the best boy)
FOUND! A Celebration In White by Enigmatree (T, 20k, WIP, WangXian, XuanLi, Afterlife AU, Underworld, god AU, 13 years of Inquiry, Happy Ending)
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10. Help!
I lost a Twitter threadfic! I could have sworn I saved it, but either I accidentally deleted it or the author did. And they were about to update it too!
It was about WWX who, during the first Burial Mounds siege, was transformed into a rabbit, and now lives as an immortal bunny. Now it's modern times and he's been rescued by a reincarnated LWJ, who is about to leave for college (veterinary) and doesn't remember anything about his past life. WWX is wary of him at first (he thinks that LWJ was amongst those who led the siege), but he eventually warms up to him and manages to tell him the truth using a computer.
Please help me find this! @blueghost13
FOUND? Here's the link for the Twitter Thread And I just discovered that it got updated 2 days ago when I had expected no more, so thanks for making me check 🤗
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11. Hi! I've been searching this fic for so long and couldn't find it. As far as I can remember in this fic Wei Ying survives the siege and he goes away with Ayuan. He invents a silver core type of thing. some kind of mechanical/physical core. And later I think the jins capture him or something. Do you have any idea about this fic?
FOUND? 🔒❤️ kick at the darkness ‘til it bleeds daylight by AlfAlfAlfAlfAlf, tardigradeschool (T, 75k, WangXian, Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Eventual Happy Ending, Getting Together, Burial Mounds Settlement Days, Inspired by The Parent Trap (1998), Kid Fic, teen shenanigans, two a-yuans, Fluff and Angst)
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12. Hi. I love your Fic Finder and Recs and your suggestions have kept me busy reading for almost 2 years now 😍
I was hoping you could help me find a fic I've recently read the summary off. Something about WY accidentally domming LZ Z somehow and turning him into a sub without realizing? And I think WQ pointed it out to him? I believe it was a modern setting, and the summary sounded very light-hearted and entertaining.
I'm not sure if that's enough info to go on, but thanks for your help in advance 🥰 @papperlapapp1
FOUND! And They Were Roommates! or The Accidental Domming of Lan Wangji by DizziDreams (E, 21k, wangxian, Dom WWX, Sub LWJ, inexperienced BDSM practices, un-/under- negotiated kink, horny climbing, horny cohabitation, horny on main except by main I mean at a party surrounded by innocent bystanders, Praise Kink, Masturbation, Bondage, Lingerie, Orgasm Delay/Denial, omg they were roommates, Modern, BDSM, debatably a bit of dom drop, Public Masturbation, Edging, Getting Together, WQ has to come in and straighten this shit out)
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13. I was reading a great fic and then Tumblr updated and ripped out from me when I was only in chapter two! Devastated. Its world building at its finest, you are not folks directly what's happened or happening. WWX is the proprietor of Yiling Garden, a cafe that offers sanctuary. Mo Xuanyu arrives in the first chapter seeking sanctuary from the Inquisition. Lan Wangji arrives, saying he's sanctuary and there for Mo Xuanyu, but WWX assumed he was inquisition at first. They have not seen each other for years. Clearly something happened to separate WWX from everyone he loves except Wen Ning, who works for the shop too, and had been raised from the dead. For unknown reasons, Wen Qing is elsewhere and happy. Wen Yuan is mentioned, but WWX doesn't know what happened to him. There are phones so it's a modern au. And... That's it. Tumblr died right after Lan Wangji asks WWX out for dinner. Help! Thank you VERY much! @lurkdot
FOUND? transmuter by WithLoweredVoices (Not rated, 113k, wangxian, Modern with Magic, Magical Realism, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending)
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14. Hi 😃 I need help to find a fic because I only remember a tiny bit! LWJ isn't wearing his forehead ribbon and LQR/Lan elders are trying to get him to wear a new one, the bit I really remember goes like this:
LQR: gives LWJ a new forehead ribbon LWJ: it's not the same 🥺🥺🥺
FOUND? A Future Family In A Broken Past by Hauntcats (T, 121k, wangxian, WWX & Wen Remnants, Jiang Family & WWX, WQ/MM, JYL/NHS, LXC/NMJ, Not Jiāng Family Friendly, Not Cultivation World Friendly, WWX Needs a Hug, Family Dynamics, What is a good family?, Fear of emotions does not excuse abuse, Not Jiang Clan Friendly, Angst with a Happy Ending, Time Travel fix-it, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon Divergence, LXC needs a hug, Everyone Needs A Hug, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Not YZY Friendly)
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15. Hi! Hope you are well. I am desperately searching for a fic I read once but cannot find it anywhere. In this fic WWX survives the siege and leaves with A yuan. He and a yuan live in hiding. wwx also builds a golden core-more like a silver core as he invents a physical core that works the same as a golden core. I can't remember how it finishes but I think Jins capture him and A yuan seeks help of LWJ. Hopefully you can find this!!! Thank You!
FOUND? 🔒❤️ kick at the darkness ‘til it bleeds daylight by AlfAlfAlfAlfAlf, tardigradeschool (T, 75k, WangXian, Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Eventual Happy Ending, Getting Together, Burial Mounds Settlement Days, Inspired by The Parent Trap (1998), Kid Fic, teen shenanigans, two a-yuans, Fluff and Angst)
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16. Hi! This is for fic finder. Its cql post canon i think. WWX goes to some place near ocean and he resque a men who battling a ghost ship? I think he was a cultivator from a nearby sect. WWX then teach them a little bit before he continue his journey. He went to Jinlintai. In the road he met a woman who goes to the same destination as him to met her wife. They become a fast friend. Thats all i can remember. Thank you! @idontknowwhattowriteforusername
FOUND! Linger by the Door (I’ve Always Been Yours)by piecrust (T, 78k, wangxian, slow burn, canon compliant)
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17. Hi! I don't know if I'm doing this right bc I'm new to tumblr... I've seen your blog before though and it's so helpful! I have a fic finder request - I remember it was a harry potter au where wwx has been gone from lwj's life for 13 years. he came back (as an animagus?) as a black rabbit and lwj was a professor at hogwarts. lwj takes care of rabbit wwx and then jgy comes with aurors at the end of the fic to attack hogwarts and lwj fights him. When lwj is almost going to be killed, rabbit wwx turns back into a human and protects him. Thanks so much!
FOUND? an armful of warmth by Alaceron (G, 3k, wangxian, Harry Potter Setting) It has a sequel, too!
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18. I seem to have read a summary or a review of a wangxian fic and can't recall if it's from this blog so i am putting in a request for help in finding it so in that summary it was mentioned that wangxian had travelled to a village and met a lady on bank of the sea but she was actually a sea monster/creature don't exactly remember what and she consumes hearts of her victim and LWJ becomes her target but he distracts her by tell her his and WWX's story while WWX tries to save LWJ as the body of the victim comes to shore after a week or so don't remember much or more so I hope this suffices also it was most likely to be a multi chapter fic with less than 10 but more than 3 chapters and that it was probably on ao3 . Thank you so much for your work.
FOUND! The Eater of Hearts by ElDiablito_SF (T, 17k, WangXian, Post-Canon, Chinese Mythology & Folklore, LWJ is Scheherezade, WWX and LQR speak to each other agenda, Angst with a Happy Ending, WangXian are very in love and very disgusting, Case Fic, Gratuitous kissage)
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19. Hi!
For the next fic finder can you help me with this ao3 fic, Modern Au where wwx gets kicked out of the Jiang family house so he has to stay (I think) in a shed close to his school, and also he has to take extra food from the school cafeteria and that’s how (I think) LQR finds him stealing after class
There was missing food so they also checked the cameras but wwx dodged them also NMJ in this AU is a cop and close to LXC
When they find out about wwx situation he’s taken to the lan house, eventual wangxian
And I don’t remember more
Thank you a lot for the help!🙇♀️❤️
FOUND? Where is home? By SpicyRamen_10969 (M, 80k, WIP, WangXian Modern AU, High School, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Coming Out, Not Jiang Family Friendly, Supportive LQR, Good Sibling LXC, Fluff, Angst with a Happy Ending, JC Being an Asshole, Possible Smut?)
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20. There is this fanfic where Sizhuai(sp?) And Jingyi are night hunting with other Lan juniors. Nearly everyone dies, except him and Jingyi because out of desperation, Sizhuai uses demonic cultivation but he gets whipped a lot with the discipline whip because of it. Because of this Jingyi leaves the Lan sect. When he wakes up, Sizhuai is devastated. Cue angst, and Sizhuai eventually tracking Jingyi down and reconciliation. Unfortunately I can't remember this fanfic title and I would love to reread it. @andyousaidtruelovedidntexsist
FOUND? Give Me A Reason by useless_slytherclaw (M, 25k, ZhuiYi, LSZ & LWJ & WWX, Junior Quartet, Angst with a Happy Ending, Heavy Angst, Friends to Lovers, Post-Canon, Canon Compliant, Mutual Pining, Minor WangXian, Minor JL/OYZZ, Aged-Up Character(s), Grief/Mourning, PTSD, Dreams and Nightmares, Hurt/Comfort, Rogue Cultivator LJY, Family Feels, Demisexual LJY, Injury Recovery, Love Confessions)
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Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 ao3
Eddie finds Wayne outside, round the back of the hotel. He’s sat on a little bench next to a trellis doing another damn crossword, the newspaper folded across his knees; and it’s almost funny, how he so easily seems to find peace and solitude during the impossible. But then Eddie remembers unplanned nights at the trailer from years ago, seeking refuge from raised voices and smashed bottles—and figures that Wayne’s always been good at carving out quiet moments amongst chaos.
Wayne looks up when Eddie sits down on the bench, too, appraises him thoughtfully.
“You’re looking better.”
“Well, damn, Wayne,” Eddie says, “was I ugly before or something?”
Wayne raises his eyes to the heavens, but he can’t hide the tiny smile tugging at his lips—and, God, Eddie thinks, he’s never taking this for granted again. Lately they’d gotten too used to passing like ships in the night—they had a vague plan to order takeout, watch T.V on one of Wayne’s rare days off, but then Chrissy…
“Steve doing good?” Wayne asks shrewdly, and Eddie nods, says that he’s heading to his house to pick up some of his stuff.
Wayne reaches into his back pocket, brings out his car keys and tosses them to Eddie. He jerks his thumb to the hotel parking lot.
“I’m parked near the front, just bring it back whenever you’re done.” He eyes Eddie, a little grave. “You just take care, all right? Don’t stop for no-one.”
Eddie nods again. Pushes back a tight knot of anxiety. “I won’t. Hey, uh… how long do we, you know,” he glances at the hotel building, “have here?”
Wayne follows his gaze. “Well, they’ve not asked me for my credit card yet,” he says, entirely straight-faced, and when Eddie just huffs a small laugh, he adds, “Government’s stepping in to re-house folks. Heard some of the trailers aren’t too damaged, so…”
Eddie puts two and two together. “People are moving back?”
“Some of ‘em,” Wayne confirms mildly. “The park still needs more work, reckon it’ll be months, at least, before it starts looking like—”
“I don’t think I can do it,” Eddie blurts out. “Go—go back, I mean.”
It’s painful to admit, that he wants to run from the one place that used to make him feel safe. But he can’t hide from it, how the horror is pervasive: how he thinks of Chrissy in the living room, and Steve’s missing tape in his bedroom, and him sinking to the ground in the trailer park, despairing, a lifeless Steve in his arms.
“All right,” Wayne says, like it’s simple.
Eddie bites his lip. “But. Wayne. It’s… it’s your home, too.”
Wayne sighs but not unkindly. He ruffles Eddie’s hair. “We’ll figure it out, Eddie,” and it sounds like he’s saying, You know full well that’s not really where ‘home’ is.
Eddie smiles. Blinks and looks away to wipe his nose with the back of his hand. When he stands up, he takes a peek at the crossword, tuts and says, “Come on, old man, you’re getting slow.”
“You’re a damn menace, that’s what you are.”
“Six across, four letters,” Eddie continues, sing-song, “All you need, to the Beatles.”
“I hadn’t got round to—”
Eddie twirls the car keys round his finger, does a stupid little spin as he leaves, just because he can. “Love!” he exclaims, hand on his heart, and Wayne chuckles.
-
He goes the extra mile in being cautious, takes backroads that he knows will be quiet, makes himself as small as possible in the driver’s seat. The town still feels ghostly, and the very occasional people he does drive by on the sidewalk don’t appear to really notice him, and he doesn’t quite know how to feel about it.
When he pulls up into Steve’s driveway, he glances in the rear-view mirror and sees another car crawling past—like it’s surveying rather than stopping. Then he realises that it’s Nancy who’s driving.
He sounds his horn as quietly as he can, and she starts, waves at him with a significant delay. She gets out, meets him at the front door.
“It’s empty, Jonathan took them all on a grocery store run,” Nancy says. Her voice is too level, like she’s putting all her effort into keeping it like that. “The spare key’s here.” She lifts up the door mat and bends down to pick up the key.
There’s mud all over her boots. Eddie only needs one look to know that it’s from the trailer park.
He kind of wants to hug her, honestly, but he doesn’t know yet what she really needs.
He lifts up the bag he’d brought. “Thought I’d do some laundry,” he says lightly, just to break the silence.
Nancy regards the bag with something like relief, and she takes it from him. “I can start a load,” she says, and then she opens the door and stops, right there in the hallway.
Eddie doesn’t blame her. With the house empty, their footsteps seem overly loud. There’s nothing to distract him from remembering the last time he was here, watching Steve’s forced normality. The clinking of bottles, back to the kids. His voice echoing eerily off the ceiling. You guys trust me, right?
Eddie gives himself a shake, heads for the stairs. “I’m just gonna—Steve wanted some clothes picked up, so…”
He trails off in invitation, looking over his shoulder.
But Nancy stays right where she is. She looks up to the top of the stairs then rapidly pales, a hand reaching out to steady herself against the wall. There’s a faint thump as she drops the bag onto the floor.
“Woah, woah.” Eddie hurries back, grabs her by the elbow. “You okay? You wanna sit down?”
Nancy shakes her head, screws her eyes shut for a moment. “No, I’m—I’m fine.”
“You sure?” Eddie says, uncertain.
She grips Eddie’s arm, breathes. Lets go and raises her head. “Yeah, I’m… I just need.” She picks up the bag again, straightens. “Just need to not—not think for a bit.”
Eddie releases his hold on her slowly, steps back when she doesn’t sway again.
“Yeah, I get that,” he says softly.
She reaches for a door to the left, before the kitchen. “Laundry room’s in here,” she says. Then, matter-of-fact, adds, “See you once you’ve got his things?”
Eddie nods but stays put. “Shout if you need me?”
Nancy softens. “Sure.”
-
In the end, Eddie’s almost glad that he heads to Steve’s bedroom alone, because he ends up freezing in the doorway for almost a full minute.
There’s more ghost-like memories in here. One of Steve’s drawers has been pulled fully out, left on the floor, and it’s like Eddie can hear Erica and Lucas scrabbling, throwing things out in their search for the tape.
Then he thinks of Dustin, his voice cracking; hearing him in the midst of asking, incredulous, “—not even going to look at me?”
Dustin’s furious, watery eyes flash through his mind, as does I hate you, and Steve turning his back, hiding as one tear falls down his cheek—
Enough.
Eddie takes a deep breath. Once he finally crosses the threshold, it’s easier—he does his best not to stop. He focuses on finding clothes that are loose and soft, easier for Steve to put on over a cast. It’s endearing, to see wrinkled t-shirts in the closet, placed close to hand, clearly worn and familiar and comforting.
He has to reach for the drawer on the floor anyway, picks a couple of sweaters in case Steve gets cold. And maybe it’s silly, but his hand lingers on the wooden surface as he does so, touching the impression of where Steve’s hand had been; as if he can somehow reach into the past and keep him safe.
He skims the bookshelf with interest, prompted by Steve’s suggestion. The majority of it is made up of old children’s books—twee collections of Winnie The Pooh and Beatrix Potter which make him smile. Then there’s a volume of poetry that catches his eye, simply because it’s been left crooked on the shelf, like Steve had recently been reading it, before distractedly putting it back.
Eddie picks it up, puts it on top of his little bundle of clothes and takes it with him.
-
Nancy’s sitting on a beanbag in the laundry room, watching the washing machine whir, eyes unfocused. The beanbag is a garish red, at odds with the rest of the furniture in the house, marking it as a ‘Steve purchase.’
The washing machine beeps when it’s done; Eddie puts his clothes in the dryer, remembering Steve’s words and slamming the door shut. Nancy jumps in her seat.
“Sorry,” Eddie says.
She exhales. “It’s fine.”
It’s then that Eddie notices she’s taken her boots off; there’s dried blood on her socks. He recalls Wayne saying she looked like she’d been at the trailer park for hours; and he wonders just how far she has walked.
But before he can even tentatively ask, Nancy speaks first.
“I’m—it wasn’t you, I just. I can’t go in his room.” Her voice is thick. “You know, Barb… Barb’s parents, they kept her room ex-exactly like it…” She laughs sadly. “I couldn’t stop thinking that she’d just walk through the door.”
Eddie got an inkling that the disappearance of Barbara Holland was Upside Down related when Nancy came out of her Vecna trance, trembling in Steve’s arms. Before they’d scaled the rope, he’d overheard her whisper, tearful, “He showed me Barb.” Caught when Steve made a soft noise like he’d been punched: “Oh, Nance.”
Now Eddie watches Nancy glance upwards, blinking rapidly, and knows that Barb can never come home.
“I just couldn’t…” Nancy sucks in a sharp breath. “Couldn’t go in there, not when—when he’s not here, this place feels like a fucking museum.”
“He’s coming home,” Eddie says. “He’s gonna be okay.”
Nancy nods slowly. She curls further into the beanbag, wincing as she moves her feet.
They don’t speak for a short while, the dryer churning in the background. Eddie finds a handheld brush in a cupboard, picks up Nancy’s boots.
“Scooch,” he says gently, and they share the beanbag.
Little by little, Eddie scrubs the mud off Nancy’s boots. It’s dried and caked on in places, obviously fresh in others.
His uncle’s voice in his head again: I think she was waiting for something to happen, too.
“Hey, Wheeler?” Eddie says, almost a whisper. “You don’t need to, uh… keep checking, you know?”
Nancy doesn’t look at him.
He thinks of her freezing at the trailer park, clutching a coffee Wayne brought her, stuck waiting, and it breaks his heart.
“Don’t go back there,” he says.
She sighs like she can’t promise that.
Eddie gathers himself. “Fine, here’s the deal.” He waits until she turns to him, expectant. “If—if you need to… don’t go back there alone, okay?”
She blinks those eyes that have seen far too much. “How?”
“I’ll go with you,” Eddie vows.
She doesn’t say anything. But she leans into him, their shoulders pressed together, and that’s all the answer he needs.
-
“Why’d you bring so much?” Steve says with amusement when Eddie shows him the bundle of clothes.
“So you’ve got options! I don’t know how you style yourself, Harrington.”
“Whatever brings out my eyes,” Steve says, deadpan.
“I thought you said your hair was your ‘best feature.’”
“Thanks for the air quotes, man, appreciate it.” Steve actually bats his eyelids. Idiot, Eddie thinks fondly. “Why’re you limiting me to only one best feature?”
“Wow. Think all that hair just hides your big head.”
Steve flips him off—correctly this time. “Pot, meet kettle,” he echoes, and laughs when Eddie throws a sweater in his face.
-
Steve catches him reading the poetry book over dinner. “You can, like, doodle in it or whatever, if you want.” He shrugs. “I’m not precious with it.”
Eddie reaches for a pen, but only to add a tongue-in-cheek note for Steve to find on the title page, signs and dates it: When it was discovered by Eddie ‘The Freak’ Munson that Steve ‘The Hair’ Harrington had hidden depths.
It’s an anthology, so Eddie flips through it out of order, settling on random pages on a whim. Then several markings in pencil catch his eye.
He pauses. He vaguely recognises this poem from English. Steve has underlined the very end.
I was much too far out all my life
And not waving but drowning.
Eddie stays on that page for a long time—thinks of Chrissy, how he’d only ever remembered her as smiling before she sat in front of him in the woods, picking the skin around her fingers.
Pictures Steve, his inexplicably tender smile in the RV. This bit really isn’t so bad, Eddie.
Steve clicks his fingers, burnt lasagne mid-way to his mouth. “Hey, where’d you go?”
Eddie starts, turns the page. “Oh, nowhere.”
He shuts the book.
#steddie fic#steddie#the self sacrificial steve agenda#steve x eddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#nancy wheeler#eddie and nancy#wayne munson#eddie and wayne munson
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Visual Effects in Only Friends MV part 2
The second song on the Only Friends OST dropped today; So What? by the amazing Ford Arun. Much like the first MV for Only Friends, this one is also has visual frameworks that made me stop and stare.
youtube
Just like my first post on this subject, where I talked about the late 90s/early 00s aesthetic of the show as well as controlled voyeurism (aka we only see what they want us to see), these themes show up again here, but a little differently. Unlike the Let's Try MV and the BTS vids which use multiple different effects and transitions as well as framing a lot of the scenes to look like (possibly) 90s camcorder footage, So What? has two visual effects (I think technically three, and I'll point out why I say it this way in a minute).
The first one is the camcorder footage effect. Except that it's even different from the Let's Try MV. While the Let's Try MV has the "play" prompt onscreen and time stamps, it now, to me, feels more like CCTV video than camcorder video. The video effect on So What? is definitely camcorder footage because it is time and date stamped.
Now, the time and date stamp is February 1st, 2020 at 6:06pm for every screen it appears on, which to me cannot be an accurate date/time for any of the scenes. Several of these scenes were from episodes 4, 5, 6, or potentially yet to air. Chuem drops info about Covid in episode one and in February of 2020, we were so early into the pandemic during that time that I'm not sure she would have referred to it so casually, plus with no Covid precautions being taken onscreen it does feel the show is set currently (aka 2023).
Why this date? Why 6:06pm? WHAT IS JOJO TRYING TO SAY HERE? Is this a specific reference to something upcoming on the show? Is this date famous in Thailand for something? Did he just pull a date and time out of a hat?
Onto the second effect: the yellow text on the screen is back! It was heavily used as a visual effect in episode one, and after a discussion with @ignoranaxed I did add it to my Narrative Frameworks post where I'm tracking visual effects on the show. We discussed whether or not this was an homage or reference to SKAM Norway, an extremely popular coming of age teen drama that had an amazingly done queer season (Season three. If nothing else, stop what you're doing and go watch SKAM Norway season three. You can thank me later). The show was so popular it has been remade in Spain, Italy, France, Germany (named Druck), Belgium (named WtFock), the United States and has even been announced as a Korean (BL?) drama for next year.
Is this an actual homage? I came down on the side of maybe. I can't swear it is, but I can't say it isn't. That yellow text on the screen is iconic due to SKAM Norway, and it is used in every single remake of the show (if Korea doesn't use it, I will cry. Also, if Korea doesn't release/air it in the same way, I will cry). Leaving that aside, the yellow text is in Thai, and as yet, I have no idea what it says because my subs only translated the song lyrics, not the onscreen words. If anyone who knows Thai can help me with this, I would love you forever because there's one other thing that shows up in yellow on the screen, and it's this:
WHY AN ELLIPSES, JOJO? WHAT DID IT SAY BEFORE THIS? I NEED TO KNOW WHY IT'S TRAILING OFF. IS IT TO BE CONTINUED? THE NOT KNOWING WILL DRIVE ME INSANE.
Onto the third , but maybe not really an effect: Is Ford photoshopped in here?
I ask this because if he is (and I can't quite tell but I think maybe?) then does that mean this is future footage coming up on the show? Or, like Let's Try MV did with it's extra SandRay footage in the car, was this just shot for the MV? I'm curious to see what people think on this.
Now for the rest of the MV where I just melt down because WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS DRAMA BETWEEN YO AND PLUG, JOJO? YOU CAN'T DO THIS. Also, is this Sand hugging Yo?
You can't do this to my girl. This will hurt.
Do we think this is Boston and Nick potentially going ice skating or roller skating? Because if it's roller skating, JOJO I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER.
In summary, the visual frameworks are back in play once again and what they're choosing to show and how feel important.
Tagging the ephemerality squad: @waitmyturtles, @wen-kexing-apologist, @ranchthoughts, @chickenstrangers, @lurkingshan, @twig-tea, @clara-maybe-ontheroad, @distant-screaming
Apologies to anyone I missed. If you would liked to be tagged in my OF posts/meta, please let me know and I will add you.
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Run These Streets {6} || Street Racer!Bucky
Summary: The group has made it to Miami!
Warnings: 18+ only, NSFW
WC: 1.8k
Bucky Masterlist || Part One || Part Two || Part Three || Part Four || Part Five || Part Six || Part Seven ||
Miami, Florida
Music spilled out onto the streets from the bars and restaurants that lined Ocean Drive and neon lights of all colours glowed along the street to cast a rainbow into the night. It was energetic and chaotic and you loved it. You would certainly miss it when you left in a few days.
“Cars don’t win races, drivers do.” Bucky slapped his hand on the table top enthusiastically and you tuned back into the conversation that was quickly turning into an argument.
“You can’t tell me that that car,” Sam argued as he pointed to an older Toyota Corolla, “could beat my Evo.”
Sam was a racer Bucky had befriended when you arrived in Miami last week and he had offered to show off his city. Like most of the street racers in the city, he drove a suped up import and invested more into making the car look good than run perfect.
“Come on, babe, back me up,” Bucky said as he draped his arm over the back of your seat.
You stopped spinning the little umbrella that had come with your cocktail and your eyebrows pinched together as you looked at the car in question. “1985- maybe -86, 1.6 litre engine. It wouldn’t be pretty afterwards and you would have to add a poor man's turbo but, yeah, it could take on an Evo.”
“Poor man’s turbo?” Sam asked Bucky as if you hadn’t been speaking English.
“Adding a funnel to the air intake so it ups the pressure and boosts combustion,” Bucky explained.
“You Brooklyn folk are built differently,” Sam said with a shake of his head before roaring with laughter and slapping the table top. “If you hadn’t been whooping our asses all week I would say you are talking shit.”
The next round was on Bucky and he found Steve on the way to the bar after he had disappeared with Hannah a while ago. From the smile on his face it was easy to guess what the pair had gone to do and Steve tossed his arm over Bucky’s shoulders. “I fucking love it here!”
You waved to Hannah as she swaggered over on unsteady legs and dropped into her seat with a slight wince that made you chuckle.
“I haven’t seen you two race yet, or is it just your men who do the racing?” Sam asked between drinking his beer.
“Oh no, I can’t even drive a stick,” Hannah admitted with a laugh before jutting her thumb over to you, “but she does. She’s about the only person who could possibly beat Bucky, if they ever raced each other.”
Sam’s eyebrows shot up his forehead in disbelief and he almost choked on his beer. “Now that is something I have to see!”
Bucky chose that moment to reappear with a handful of drinks and cocky grin revealing the small dimple in his chin. “How ‘bout it, doll? Up for a little friendly competition?”
You took your drink as you rose to the challenge, “No such thing as a friendly competition, and I only race for a real prize.”
A chorus of oohs and aahs broke out around the table but you only had eyes for Bucky as he leaned in closer with a smirk. “Yeah? What prize should we race for then?”
You bit your lip and looked up from under your lashes as you battered them his way. “I’m sure you can think of something you must want.”
His eyes trailed down the line of your cleavage, his pupils dilating with the thought of what lay underneath. “I already have everything I want.”
“Are they always like this?” Sam interrupted as he whispered loudly to Steve.
“Yup,” Steve said with an exasperated sigh. “Believe it or not it was worse before they got together.”
You hid your laugh in Bucky’s shoulder as the moment passed and a normal conversation resumed. You should have known Bucky wouldn’t let it go.
“Rise and shine, doll,” Bucky woke you with a sing-song trill. “One large coffee, just for you.”
It hurt to open your eyes with the curtains letting in the harsh sunlight that reflected off the Atlantic Ocean and an ungodly groan escaped your dry lips as you rolled away and pulled the covers back over you. “Go away.”
“That’s not what you were begging me last night,” he teased from the loveseat he was lounging upon, watching you with growing amusement. “Quite the opposite.”
“James,” you whined as you dragged yourself up against the headboard and tried to keep your eyes open long enough to pick up the coffee cup on the side table. “I’m not a morning person.”
“It’s four in the afternoon.” He jumped up from the couch with far too much energy and sauntered over to the bed. The sunlight hit his hair and illuminated the hint of red that almost always was hidden by the dark brown strands before he ran his fingers through the tresses. It was then that you noticed he was shirtless as his biceps bulged with the movement and the wariness of sleep evaporated.
“Do you remember last night?” he asked as he ran his thumb over your bottom lip, freeing it from the teeth you had caught it between.
You could feel the evidence of last night and the memory that came with it as heat began to spread across your skin. “We got a little wild.”
His dark chuckle had your toes curling beneath the sheets. “Yeah we did, but I’m not talking about when we got back here. Do you remember the challenge?”
You blinked once, then twice. The memory slowly rose to the surface and you realised he wasn’t talking about the new positions you had experimented with while intoxicated. With a groan, you placed the coffee cup back on the side and slapped your forehead. “Shit.”
“Drink up, babygirl.” He stole a kiss before laughing as he made his way to his duffle bag. “I have a race to win.”
The sun had already begun setting by the time you had showered, dressed and met up with Steve and Hannah for dinner. There was a tension in the air as they ate sedately and you looked to Bucky for an answer but he shrugged, just as confused as you were.
“Everything okay?” Bucky asked Steve after putting his knife and fork down.
Steve looked to Hannah and took her hand, the silence heavy. With a deep breath, Steve finally spoke, “We have decided to stay down here. Permanently.”
Bucky blinked at his best friend for almost a full minute before he could even attempt a response. Even then, all that came out was a choked sound from the back of his throat.
“Wow, that’s a big move!” you said when you recovered and elbowed Bucky who was still stunned. “We’re gonna miss you guys so much.”
Bucky tore his napkin into tiny pieces and avoided eye contact with everyone. “You’re really gonna leave Brooklyn?”
Steve gave his best friend a small smile and leant over the table to punch him in the shoulder. “It will always be my home, and we’ll visit so often you won’t even know I was gone.”
The waitress appeared to remove the empty dishes and you could see her eyes darting around the group, taking in the change in the atmosphere since she had last come around. No one said a thing as she stacked the plates onto her tray and made a quick exit out the back of the restaurant.
“There’s one thing I need before you head back home,” Steve murmured, Bucky’s head snapping to attention, “to see you two finally go head to head.”
The prospect of the race brought Bucky back from the morose mood he was slipping into and he draped his arm over the back of your chair. “Way ahead of you there, Sam’s already got a race organised.”
Steve’s face split with a wide grin and he rushed to grab his wallet and toss a handful of cash on top of the bill. “There’s no way a stranger is going to coordinate the race I have waited 10 years for. Let’s go.”
Your group had only been in Miami for eight days but it was enough to be recognised the moment Bucky pulled up in the blacked out Mustang he had won in Virginia Beach. Steve pulled into the underground car park a moment later an orange Firebird he won the night they sold the Ferrari.
Every race in Miami since had only been for cash and the boys were flush.
“How’s your girl meant to race with no car?” Sam said by way of greeting as he saw you standing with Bucky at the hood of his car.
“She can use mine,” Steve answered as he tossed the keys to you.
You caught the keys but they were swiped in an instant and Sam shook his head. “Do me the honour,” he said as he held out his keys instead. “It’s not the car that wins races right?”
“Right,” you agreed with a grin, taking the keys and scanning the busy car park for the dark blue Evo VIII. “It will only make his loss more humiliating when I spank him with an import.”
Bucky nipped your earlobe and made you jump before he whispered, “I’ll spank you.”
You turned in his arms and twirled your fingers in the longer strands of his hair at his nape. His blue eyes were practically glowing in the fluorescent lights along the ceiling and you could see the desire reflected on your face and you tiptoed to reach his lips.
“I might just enjoy it,” you purred. Unable to resist any longer, you caught his plump bottom lip between your teeth and he groaned as his hips pressed against yours.
A throat cleared loudly behind you and Sam shifted awkwardly as he scratched his neck. “I’m just gonna go, uh, check everything’s all set.”
You lightly slapped Bucky’s chest as you pulled away. “Stop being such a distraction.”
His laugh followed you as you went in search of the Evo and found it surrounded by admirers. They watched with a mixture of surprise and apprehension as you popped the hood and inspected the belts and hoses for any splits before plugging your laptop into the ECU and checking the readings. The car was running in optimum condition and gave you more insight into Sam than talking to him over the last week had. The man knew how to take care of his car.
“She good?” Sam asked as he stuck his head through the car window to see the graph of the running engine on your screen.
“Better than good,” you replied with a grin. “She’ll do just nicely.”
“Good,” he nodded as he reached through and clapped a hand on your shoulder with a squeeze of encouragement, “'cause it’s time.”
Click here for part seven.
Click here for part seven.
#run these streets#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes imagines#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes fanfiction#Bucky Barnes x you#Bucky Barnes x y/n#bucky fanfic#street racer au
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Honestly i love each and every AU you graced upon us
Let’s say 6 11 18 28 plus one you would like for the Monster AU 🫶🏻
This is so sweet of you to say, thank you ;o; <3
6. Do they go out often or prefer to stay indoors?
I think, realistically, since this is still the ESC-universe in a way, going out can be hard because they'll be recognized. But, I think when they're together, they do try to have at least one night out because they're both fairly sociable, but definitely ensure that they have at least one night in together. (And not just for the bedroom... though that's certainly involved.)
But it's trying to soak up what domesticity and privacy they can, cherishing those quiet moments together. Cementing their relationship in new, wonderful ways.
11. What’s a song that describes their relationship? Or, what’s the song that they’ve deemed “their” song?
So this is an AU with a playlist, but that playlist is just the most unhinged music possible. Despite that, there are bangers so I'll share a few different flavors of their relationship:
This one is self-explanatory:
so is this one:
and a sweet one:
Looking at these, I think what makes them so funny to write is the absolute emotional whiplash of insane balls-to-the-wall almost parody-level sex they have combined with the utterly sincere and earnest romance.
18. What does a date night out look like for them?
When they have a moment to visit one another, I like to think they either go to a cabin in Finland or Bojan takes Jere somewhere camping and scenic. They both love the outdoors, so that - combined with privacy - is an easy choice.
Lots of basking in the sun and stars and laying by the water.
24. What are their favorite places to kiss on their partner(s)? What are their favorite types of kisses?
Everywhere. There is nowhere Bojan won't put his mouth for better or worse. Man shoved his whole head into a chest cavity and kissed Jere's beating heart. If that's not romance, I don't know what is.
Jere kisses Bojan all over as well, but he's noticed he responds particularly well to his neck, the crook of his elbow, the inside of his thighs.
When they're not being saucy though, just little pecks on the cheek, on the lips. Always coming up behind the other one, leaning in with a silly shimmy, going 'smack!' with their lips, and then giggling and bouncing away.
28. What’s something that reminds them of their partner(s)? Do they have anything on them daily as a reminder (a photo, phone background, tattoo, clothing/accessory, etc)?
Due to the distance, and being in the ESC-adjacent monster universe, I think they'd have to keep things low key. So no phone backgrounds or something people could easily spot. But, deeeefinitely lots of stolen clothes, especially from Bojan's end.
He has a hoodie that he particularly loves and can't bring himself to wash.
Jere keeps a polaroid of Bojan from the Nordic Tour :) I like to think they had some yet-untold adventure during that tour in this AU :)
Also re-reading some of the fic now and cackling because I'm so happy you all enjoyed our sopping wet pathetic version of Bojan who had bangers such as:
And then Bojan careens the metaphorical car off a bridge because he keeps speaking.
“Whether that means being a 24/7 toy for monster cock or spending the rest of my life in complete abstinence with you, I’d take it all. Whatever you want.”
and
Jere answers quickly in the form of grabbing Bojan’s hand and slotting them together.
There’s a definitively wet sound to it that surprises him though, and Jere does a poor job of hiding his comically horrified expression.
“Sorry… I’m kind of nervous right now.” Bojan says.
Bojan’s hand is slick with sweat. A veritable slip-and-slide of nerves bodily represented. To think that this man — actor, songwriter — who’s been assigned a national heartthrob by the media gets nervous holding hands.
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[スタオケ] La Corda d'Oro Starlight Orchestra Main Story Chapter 2-6 Translation
*Starlight Orchestra Masterlist
*Spoiler free: Translations will remain under cut
*Main story tag will be #Main Starlight
Akira: Phew…
☆ ━━━━━━━ ∘◦♬◦∘ ━━━━━━━ ☆
⊳ Choice: That was brilliant!
Akira: Well, your Violin playing skills weren't bad either.
⊳ Choice: I was right to invite you two to join us!
Seiji: You think so? I'm glad to see that you're pleased.
Seiji: Well, I'll have to excuse myself here.
☆ ━━━━━━━ ∘◦♬◦∘ ━━━━━━━ ☆
Akira: Dunno. He's busy too, isn't he? Though, I wouldn't know much about it.
Akira: 'Sides, that song we just played went well, so it's not that much of a problem now that he's gone, is it?
Akira: He did play the Trumpet in the past too, for that matter.
☆ ━━━━━━━ ∘◦♬◦∘ ━━━━━━━ ☆
⊳ Choice: What about you, Kirigaya?
Akira: Me? Well, there was the Brass Band Club back when I was in elementary school.
Akira: Then there was the Brass Band Orchestra Club in middle school who was a pain in the ass, tellin' me to clean up and put myself together a lil' more.
⊳ Choice: What of the "Yaksha of Route 6"?
Akira: Huh, you're aware of that? Oh, I s'pose Yasu was the one who told you about it. He does like to run his mouth off.
⊳ Choice: Is your middle school nearby?
Akira: Yeah. It's 10 minutes away from Joyo on foot.
☆ ━━━━━━━ ∘◦♬◦∘ ━━━━━━━ ☆
Akira: This place is like my backyard, see? I've been loitering 'round these streets ever since I was a kid.
⊳ Choice: Was Osakabe in the same middle school?
Akira: Yeah, he was.
Akira: Wouldn't it be better to ask him about it if you wanted to know more about him?
Akira: What, you tryin' to get in his good graces or somethin'? Must be hard being in your position, Concetmistress.
Akira: Well, I s'pose that's part of your job and all, but I'm sure that even you know that this is not somethin' I can help you with, yeah?
Akira: After all, we're just a bunch of "bad students" who are shunned by the school.
Akira: The way he does things is pretty insidious, and there are loads of people on my side who hold a grudge against him.
Akira: Some of my guys would rather dance a dance of death with a snake than team up with Osakabe.
Akira: But each to his own, right?
Yasu: Kirigaya-san! Trouble! Big trouble!!
Akira: Hm? What happened?
Yasu: Those guys from Oba Commercial High School who came to our school came back. And this time, with their top dog, Busujima, in tow!
Akira: Oh? They're back? Things are finally getting interesting…
Yasu: Now's not the time to be amused by things like this!
Yasu: He's a monster notoriously known as "Mito's Armoured Car"! It doesn't matter how hard we retaliate; it doesn't work at all!
Yasu: He should have been abroad to play rugby or American football, but he messed up big-time over there, so now he's back.
Yasu: Our guys are so frightened that it feels like we're all attending a wake or somethin'!
Akira: There's no helpin' you guys. So? Where's the funfair at?
Yasu: Wha- Wait! Hey! Kirigaya-san!? You're just going to walk right up to him without taking any precautions!?
Yasu: W-WAIT UP!!
Hayate: …That looks bad; as bad as it comes. Looks like it won't be possible for him to compromise with Osakabe-san.
Hayate: What? I don't hate people like Kirigaya.
Hayate: He's chivalrous enough to protect his subordinates, and even takes the initiative needed to see it through. I can understand why people are willing to follow his lead.
Sakuya: Oh? That's unexpected. I thought you were more of the "That's against the rules. Let's crackdown on them" type.
Hayate: For students of our school, yes. First, I'll have him tuck his shirt tails, that's hanging out for the world to see, back in his pants.
Sakuya: …I'm glad Kirigaya isn't one of our school's students. Wouldn't you agree, (L/n)?
☆ ━━━━━━━ ∘◦♬Main Starlight♬◦∘ ━━━━━━━ ☆
Previous Part: (Chapter 2-5)
Next Part: (Chapter 2-7)
#金色のコルダ スターライトオーケストラ#スタオケ#Starlight Orchestra#Otome#Translations#Kiniro no Corda#La Corda d'Oro Starlight Orchestra#Main Starlight
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Pretty please, the black parade Opinions
several people have said they want to hear my opinions on this which is pleasantly surprising!! so, i love every song on this album to death, and due to procrastination on having to pick something for the lowest spot, i decided to start with the Best one. also this took rlly long because i ended up re-listening to the whole album, whoops
1: Mama
cmon. fucking cmon. does this genuinely need to be defended like at all. this entire song altered my brain for real. the circusy music vibes?? the fucked up lyrics?? the emotions??? you should have raised a baby girl i should have been a better son?? perfection. 10000/10. fight me
2: House of Wolves
there is just so much stuff in this song, and it's all immaculate. from start to end you've got the most sound per sound you can possibly get, in the best way. AND!!! fucking AND!! it's got villain song vibes. 11/10 what more could you want
3: Famous Last Words
*choking back unspeakable emotions* yeah it's fine i guess
(11/10)
4: Dead!
this is partly so high because it's also got that great concentration of most sound per sound, but also for the sheer upbeat energy of such a macabre premise. i'm a sucker for that!!! also, it is a Blorbo Song. i have assigned it to an OC who is very dear to me and that boosts it up. (Hey. i said this would be biased). also the unhinged energies near the end are just the best <3 10/10
5: Welcome To The Black Parade
it's the album's namesake. it changes your brainwaves forever. it's vibes are impossible to replicate. even my parents know every word. i couldn't not put it in the top 5. caaaaaarrrryyyyyyy oooonnn-- 10/10
6: Kill All Your Friends
ah. we've come to the one I can't play in the car because of how concerning the lyrics are to my mother. look,,, i am a basic bitch. i hear a song that's upbeat and tragic and i love it!!! it's also got that nice sound-per-sound quality again. black parade songs in general are good at that. 10/10
7: This Is How I Disappear
it's angsty. it's angry. it lets you scream "FUCK" really loudly. it lets the writer brain run wild. it sounds deeply, deeply haunted. there's 38 seconds of guitar before you get a single word. it's perfect. 10/10
8: The Sharpest Lives
10/10. theres a place in the dark where the animals go you can take off your skin in the cannibal glow juliet loves the beat and the lust it commands drop the dagger and lather the blood on your hands romeo
9: My Way Home Is Through You
we're back at soooo much sound per sound!!! this one is more raw and angry and i love it for that. it does something to my brain i dont even know what but it just does. it's Also a blorbo song too. 10/10
10: Heaven Help Us
i've probably actually listened to this one the least, but that's because it literally overwhelms me to listen to for more than a few times in the row. istg it's a religious experience. 9/10
11: Teenagers
i sing this one in the car with my dad very very loudly :D it's a funky funky tune, it doesn't really give quite the same vibes as the rest of the album but I really like it! 8/10
12: The End.
i think it's integral to the Dead! experience!!!! that's why it's higher than some of the others that i actually liked a bit better. if you haven't listened to these songs back to back (The End. coming first) then you have not lived. but on its own, i really mostly like the part from "when i grow up i want to be nothing at all" -> onwards. 7/10
13: Sleep
i have. zero thoughts. not a single coherent thought about this song. it is just,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, skjdfkdgjskda.sfdsdf. to be clear the lack of thoughts isnt "oh its fine i guess :/" it's "i am physically incapable of getting my emotions into a coherent order over this" lol. 8/10
14: Disenchanted
really good!!!!!!!!! but I'm not a huge fan of the really calm opening or the way he sings at the very very start. however it gets really, like.... hypnotizing? after that, and then really powerful, and i just. <3 <3 <3 absolute solid 8/10 song that i still VERY MUCH enjoy despite it being all the way at 15 on this list skhfksdkjf. (Tho... A Secret.... i had a bit of an enemies to lovers arc with this one. i used to dislike it.) 8/10
15: I Don't Love You
a good song but not one i'd listen to for hours on repeat like some of the others. I think it's got some REALLY banger moments but it could have been More bangery, you know?? still a solid 7/10 though
16: Blood
another funky one!!!!!! it's really fun and makes me laugh a bit, especially "i'm such an awful FUUUUUUUCK!!". however (and i know this is bc it's a hidden track but still) i can't stand the minute of silence at the start skjdfhksdjf, i like to loop my songs for constant Noises and i can't do it w/this one. 6.5/10 again
17: Cancer
objectively it's a good song but for subject matter reasons it tends to make me very very sad, so it's a lower one on the list. nothing against the song though it's so good but it genuinely makes me close to crying lmao. so i don't listen to it very much at all. 6/10
~
and that has been Black Parade Opinions with Nico!!! if anyone bothers me some more i will do the sweet revenge, conventional weapons & danger days opinions as well
(i,,,, have not listened to bullets. whoops)
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Truth Is Stranger Than Fiction
Criminal Minds AU, Reid/OC
After Meave's untimely death Spencer never thought he'd find another love, he didn't think it possible that he could love someone else as much as he did Meave. Yet here he was falling head over heels for a gorgeous stranger in red, who might very well be the unsub in the B.A.U's latest case.
Song for the chapter: Vampire by In The Dark
"Please, don't go out tonight, daddy!"
A little girl with yellow ribbons tied around the end of her brunette pigtails ran after her father, hands reaching out to grab something - anything. The edge of her father's coat, the meaty fingers of his hands as he stopped by the front door to snatch his car keys from the hook irritably.
He was a mountain of a man at 6 feet with broad, muscular shoulders and the hardened lines of an overworked beat cop who's seen more horrible things in his life than he'd have liked to. He heaved a sigh as his fingers curled around the tiny, metal key ring.
"Sweetie, daddy really needs this night off for himself tonight. Natalie is in the living room right now waiting on you to pick out a movie before bed."
Natalie, the pretty blonde babysitter he's had take care of his precious baby Delia since she was sixteen in high school. Trustworthy, loyal, has a massive crush on him.
But not his date, who he should have been on the way to pick up ten minutes ago while Delia was clinging to his leg.
"Natalie again! I don't like her, daddy. And I don't want you to go out either. You're trying to replace mommy and no one can replace mommy!"
Her father crouched down to her height and gave her a half smile, outstretching his hand to tussle Delia's hair playfully. "No one will ever replace your mommy, baby. And the woman I'm seeing tonight is really, really cool. Just like your mommy was. You can meet her another time once I've got to know her a little better and I think you'll end up liking her just as much as daddy does."
Delia pouted and swatted her father's hand away from her head, "But why do you have to go out? Why can't you just bring her here?!"
"Because daddy has to be careful who he brings around you. Because daddy is supposed to protect his baby girl and keep his little girl safe from crazy women who just want daddy, not the whole package."
Delia started to grin, "I'm part of that package. Ain't I, daddy? You won't forget me, right?"
"Never forget you, pumpkin! Daddy will be back before you wake up in the morning and he'll have you ready a whole stack of pancakes with chocolate syrup smiley-faces on them. I promise."
Delia jumped up and down excitedly, "Okay! I'm gonna go to sleep early so I can wake up early and be up when you get home to make pancakes."
Then she bolted for the living room while her father slipped out the front door, neither knowing it was the last time they would converse as father and daughter.
The last time they would interact together.
. o . O . o . O . o .
"What do we got here?"
"Male, early to mid-thirties, looks like he was going somewhere real nice. Wearing a suit, bouquet of flowers in the backseat. His throat was slashed from ear to ear, but it looks as if that was just to cover up the actual cause of death."
"Are those teeth marks on the victim's neck?"
"Could be, it's a little hard to tell in this light. What kind of freak would bite someone until they bled to death though? Seems like whoever did this was out their minds with delusion."
"What? You don't believe in vampires?"
Snickers surrounded the officers on scene. It was always good to have a sense of humor when dealing with situations like this. A dead man found in a running car sitting at the curb of an all-night convenient store, drained completely of blood with no evidence of struggle. CSI was currently dusting for fingerprints while a crowd began to gather outside the yellow crime tape, all looking on in horror and shock and awe.
The captain sniffed in disdain, all gray hair and no nonsense. "No, detective, I don't believe in hokum and mumbo jumbo. I believe in what I can see and touch. I believe in fact and the fact is at this point we've had four unusual deaths within the past week, no leads, and I'm afraid if this continues we will have to issue a city wide curfew."
"What do you suggest we do then, captain?"
The detective was young, late twenties. Just got out of the academy.
"I think it's time we involve the F.B.I. Something about these murders strikes me as odd and it's not just the victim's being drained completely of blood that has me stumped."
. o . O . o . O . o .
Garcia shook her head, hot pink curls bouncing in her face as she did so. "I just can't wrap my head around how all these people, men and women, ended up like this. Completely drained of blood, throats slashed, and no evidence of our unsub at all. None! What is this guy? A ghost?"
"No, not a ghost and not a vampire either."
Hotch strolled into the office with a grim expression on his face, throwing down a stack of files on the table. "I don't believe in either and this unsub is neither. Just a sick individual who's imitating a fictional horror movie monster."
"Or think they're an actual vampire," chimed in Morgan, twirling a ballpoint pen in his fingertips. "What if we're dealing with a young woman? Teenager, maybe."
"Statistically vampire movies are favored by female youths between the ages of twelve and seventeen, as well as women and men immersed in the gothic culture. Vampires have been a staple of goth culture since Nosferatu and Bram Stoker's Dracula."
Morgan grinned briefly, "It's so good to have you and all of your nerdy facts back at the B.A.U. Reid. I was actually starting to miss them."
The doctor's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Don't you mean you missed me? I am where the nerdy facts come from."
JJ cleared her throat, "The case?"
"Right, sorry.."
Hotch nodded his head towards Garcia, "Our amazing tech analyst has already pulled all the information she could find on our four victim's. All different ages, non-gender specific targets, two of them had families but the other two were in different stages of homelessness. This unsub is cunning and knows how to blend in extremely well, making it seem as if they were a ghost."
"How do we explain the lack of physical evidence? This unsub must be highly germophobic to have not even left a single strand of hair."
Reid.
"The unsub we are currently tracking is definitely skilled in covering their tracks, which explains the need to mask cause of death. I feel like at this point we have more questions than answers, but we're not gonna let that stop us. I heard there was a witness. Who is she exactly?"
Garcia cleared her throat before speaking, "Her name is Alyce Dragomir. Age 24, no priors, no paper trail. She doesn't even have a credit score. It's as if she doesn't even exist in the system other than her birth records. Apparently this Alyce Dragomir hails from Romania, where Vlad the Impaler once ruled."
Morgan's eyebrows rose in surprise, "Are we sure she isn't the unsub we're looking for?"
"It's a possibility we can't rule out just yet. Has she come in for questioning?"
Hotch.
JJ spoke up in a meek voice, looking around nervously as if she were worried she could be heard through the walls by this mysterious Alyce. As if Alyce was, in fact, a vampire with super sensitive hearing.
"Actually, yes. We have her waiting on us now. She hasn't moved an inch since we sat her down in one of our interrogation rooms, nor asked for anything to drink. I had to basically pry one of our agents out of the interrogation room after me. All he did was stare at her the whole time, it was kind of creepy."
Hotch shook his head growing agitated, "Don't tell me you believe in vampires. They don't exist and we could quite possibly already be sitting right across from the unsub we're looking for so let's not get distracted by fairy tales."
"Technically vampires are myth, not fairy tales."
Reid.
"Right, which is exactly why I'm sending you into the interrogation room. You and Jareau are to go in there, while I go back to the crime scene with Morgan and Rossi."
Hotch.
JJ's eyes grew big looking over at Hotch, "What if she really is a vampire and you're sending us to our doom?"
"You have a gun. If you feel like you need extra protection though I'm sure you can break a table leg to make yourself a wooden stake."
Morgan.
"Ha ha, very funny. I don't think so," JJ scoffed. Although she was starting to feel on edge about going in to interrogate this strange woman who leaves no trace of her existence.
#criminal minds#au#alternate universe#spencer reid#derek morgan#penelope garcia#jennifer jareau#david rossi#aaron hotchner#oc
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114 of 2023
NSFW Asks (yeah again lol)
1:When did you lose your virginity?
At the age of 24.
2: Rough sex or soft sex?
No sex.
3: Do you have any unusual kinks/fetishes?
No. I’m a boring dude XD
4: Weirdest place you’ve had sex?
Our car.
5: Favourite sex position?
“Leave me alone so I can sleep”.
6: Do you like to be dominant or submissive?
Neither.
7: Have you ever had any one night stands?
No, and I don’t see the piont if I have no interest in sex whatsoever.
8: Sex on the bed, couch or the floor?
No sex, thanks. In bed if he really wants.
9: Have you ever had sex in a public place?
Does our car count?
10: Have you ever been caught masturbating?
Almost. I’m still ashamed.
11: What does your favourite sexy underwear look like?
I don’t wear anything like that.
12: How often do you have sex?
Once or twice a month, because my husband starts complaining if we don’t do it for too long.
13: Is there anybody right now you’d like to have sex with?
Nope. I’m not interested in partnered sexual activities.
14: Do you prefer giving or receiving oral sex?
I hate both.
15: Most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you during sex?
Farting, probably.
16: A song you’d listen to during hard/rough/kinky sex?
What, I dobn’t get the appeal.
17: A song you’d listen to during soft/slow/passionate sex?
See above.
18: Are you into dressing up for sex?
Not at all.
19: Would you prefer sex in the bath or sex in the shower?
Neither.
20: If you could have sex with anyone right now, who would it be?
Nobody.
21: Have you ever had a threesome? If not, would you?
No and no.
22: Do you/would you use sex toys?
No.
23: Have you ever sent someone a dirty text/picture?
Ew no. Not appealing at all.
24: Would you have sex with your best friend?
My husband is my best friend so yes, but only for pleasing him.
25: Is there anything you do after sex? (for example, smoke, eat, drink)
Snuggle.
26: Something that will never fail to get you horny?
Biology, I’m a man lol.
27: Early morning sex or late night sex?
No sex.
28: Favourite body part on the opposite sex?
I’m not attracted to the opposite sex.
29: Favourite body part on the same sex?
Eyes and arms.
30: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don’t want anyone to find:
Dead bodies.
31: Weirdest sexual act some has performed [or tried to perform] on/with you:
Nothing too extreme.
32: Have you ever tasted yourself? [If no, would you?] [If yes, what did you think?]
Lol no. I can’t bring myself to doing it. Bodily fluids are certainly not my thing.
33: Is it ever okay to not use a condom:
Well, maybe when heterosexual couple is trying to have a child.
34: A food that you would like to use during a sexual experience:
Wut.
35: Worst possible time to get horny:
Anything in public places.
36: Do you like it when your sexual partner moans?
I hate it. It’s so irritating.
37: How much fapping is too much fapping:
Doing it for days with no end? I don’t know, really. It’s a personal thing.
38: Best sexual complement you ever got:
I don’t care about sexual compliments.
39: Favorite foreplay activities:
Jeez, foreplay is boring. Such a waste of time, just get to the piont.
40: What do you wear to bed?
Nothing, actually.
41: When was the first time you masturbated:
I don’t know, at the age of 15?
42: Do you have any nude/masturbating pictures/video of yourself?
No, I’d be so embarrassed.
43: Have you ever/when was the last time you had sex outside?
No.
44: Have/would you ever have sex in public?
Nope.
45: Have/would you ever had a threesome?
God no.
46: What is one random object you’ve used to masturbate?
I don’t use random objects, just my hands.
47: Do you watch gay/lesbian porn? why/why not?
Couples having sex don’t turn me on. I’m more likely to get some excitement from watching one guy playing with himself.
48: Do you like oral sex? (why/why not)
No. Too overwhelming and too messy.
49: How do you feel about tattoos on someone you are interested in?
It’s cool if he has them, but it’s not a must.
50: How would you feel about taking someones virginity?
If they gave consent, then okay.
51: Is there any food you would NOT recommend using during a sexual encounter?
What do you even have in your head?
52: Would you rather be a pornstar or a prostitute?
No.
53: Do you watch porn?
Rarely, I find 99% of it boring.
54: Have you ever been called a freak? Why?
No, I haven’t.
55: Do you feel comfortable going “commando”?
No, I don’t.
56: Would you have a problem with going down on someone if they hadn’t shaved their pubic hair?
Hair doesn’t matter, I always have a problem with “going down on someone”.
57: If you could give yourself head, would you?
Ew, no.
58: Booty or Boobs?
I don’t see any reason why a gay dude would be interested in boobs.
59: Have you ever cheated on someone? (Why?)
No, I haven’t. If I find sex personally pointless, why would I be willing to do it with yet another person?
60: If you were the other sex for a day, what are five things you would do?
Crying, feeling disgusted with myself, hating myself, can’t think of more.
61: have you ever watched someone masturbate?
Only on videos.
62: has anyone ever watched you masturbate?
Hopefully not.
63. Have you ever had an erection and someone noticed?
I still hope he didn’t.
64. What is your method of masturbation? (ie. toys, clitorial, prostate)
Like the average guys do it, I don’t need anything more.
65. What is your bra/penis size?
You want to know too much. I’m not gonna say a meter because it’s ridiculous XD
66. What is the strangest thing you have ever put up your vagina/anus?
Nothing?
67. When was the last time you masturbated?
Three days ago or so.
68. When was the last time you had sex?
Also three days ago.
69. When was the last time you watched porn?
Long time ago, it’s boring.
70. Have you ever bought a sex toy? If so, which one did you buy last? First sex toy? If not, which one do you plan on buying when you do?
No, ny husband did, but I have no use in them.
71. Guys:Circumsized?
No, I’m not.
72. Which not-genital part of your body do you like being touched?
By others, none. By myself, thighs maybe.
73. Which genital part of your body do you like being touched?
Again, none if done by others.
74. Girls:Are you able to achieve orgasm just through breast stimulation?
N/A.
75. Have you anonymously sent a sexual ask to someone on tumblr?
Nope, I’m not interested in sex lives of other people.
76. When was the last time you have had a wet dream?
When I was a teenager probably.
77. Which wet dream was your favorite?
None. I’ve only had three and they were all ridiculous.
78. Is there a friend you would willingly have sex with?
No. Not even my husband.
79. Is there a celebrity/character you would willingly have sex with?
No. I find someone out there attractive, but in every possible meaning excep^t sexual.
80. Favorite sexual position?
Leave me alone.
81. Do you like being called a slut or whore in bed?
No, it would seriously annoy me.
82. Are you into any BDSM?
Not at all.
83. Have you ever wanted to have sex with someone but knew you couldnt for any reason? Why?
I’m kind of curious about one guy (not like I’d act on it anyway), but he’s 21, too young for me.
84. Do you like dirty talk?
I hate it.
85. Are you loud or quiet during sex? Masturbation?
Very quiet. I don’t make any sounds.
86. Have you ever been inturrepted during sex or masturbation? Who/what?
Lol, “inturrepted”. XD Yeah, my parents when I was a teenager.
87. What kind of porn do you like to watch?
Solo guys, and even that tends to be boring.
88. Have you ever confessed to someone that you got an erection over them? What about masturbated to them?
No, I’d die of shame probably XD he doesn’t need to know.
89. Have you ever masturbated because your sexual partner wasn’t there when you needed them?
No. I don’t need any sexual partner. Myself is more than enough.
90. Have you ever had a one night stand? Do you still keep in contact with them?
No, I haven’t.
91. Have you ever had a friends with benefits? Are they still beneficial?
I’m not interested in such things.
92. Ask whatever you want
No.
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NSFW Asks
1:When did you lose your virginity? 16
2: Rough sex or soft sex? With women, soft. With men, rougher.
3: Do you have any unusual kinks/fetishes? group sex, voyeurism, exhibitionism
4: Weirdest place you’ve had sex? Hood of a strangers car at girlfriend’s apartment complex
5: Favourite sex position? girl on top. With a guy, me getting doggied.
6: Do you like to be dominant or submissive? more submissive
7: Have you ever had any one night stands? a few with girls, many with guys
8: Sex on the bed, couch or the floor? bed or couch
9: Have you ever had sex in a public place? yes
10: Have you ever been caught masturbating? yes
11: What does your favourite sexy underwear look like? black leatherish jock
12: How often do you have sex? 2-3 times a month if lucky
13: Is there anybody right now you’d like to have sex with? not off hand
14: Do you prefer giving or receiving oral sex? love giving, like getting
15: Most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you during sex? While fucking girlfriend in passenger seat in car port, her sister comes out to tell her mom wants her to come in, my ass was up in the air.
16: A song you’d listen to during hard/rough/kinky sex? Fuck you like an animal
17: A song you’d listen to during soft/slow/passionate sex? Can’t think of one
18: Are you into dressing up for sex? no
19: Would you prefer sex in the bath or sex in the shower? Love shower sex
20: If you could have sex with anyone right now, who would it be? Monica Bellucci
21: Have you ever had a threesome? If not, would you? Yes
22: Do you/would you use sex toys? I do
23: Have you ever sent someone a dirty text/picture? Yes
24: Would you have sex with your best friend? No, none do it for me
25: Is there anything you do after sex? (for example, smoke, eat, drink) Sleep
26: Something that will never fail to get you horny? Touch or body contact
27: Early morning sex or late night sex? Late night
28: Favourite body part on the opposite sex? Boobs...gotta love ‘em
29: Favourite body part on the same sex? Cock
30: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don’t want anyone to find: butt plugs
31: Weirdest sexual act some has performed [or tried to perform] on/with you: urinated on guy laying in bathtub at sex party. I had to go, was drunk and sign on shower door said he wanted it.
32: Have you ever tasted yourself? [If no, would you?] [If yes, what did you think?] Yes. I liked it.
33: Is it ever okay to not use a condom: Yes
34: A food that you would like to use during a sexual experience: Cucumber
35: Worst possible time to get horny: At work. I have no privacy
36: Do you like it when your sexual partner moans? Love it
37: How much fapping is too much fapping: More than 10 times a week?
38: Best sexual complement you ever got: We need to do this more often
39: Favorite foreplay activities: Nuzzling a woman’s neck
40: What do you wear to bed? Gym shorts and tshirt
41: When was the first time you masturbated: Found dad’s playboy and it just happened. I think a friend had told me about jerking off and coming before that.
42: Do you have any nude/masturbating pictures/video of yourself? Pictures
43: Have you ever/when was the last time you had sex outside? Under a blanket on a busy beach while waiting for friends to show up for a night time beach party.
44: Have/would you ever have sex in public? Yes
45: Have/would you ever had a threesome? Yes
46: What is one random object you’ve used to masturbate? grapefruit
47: Do you watch gay/lesbian porn? why/why not? Yes because it makes me horny
48: Do you like oral sex? (why/why not) Yes, love to give pleasure. When receiving, I like the extra sensation rather than just a plain hole.
49: How do you feel about tattoos on someone you are interested in? Not into large tattoos. A small tasteful one on a woman can be sexy though.
50: How would you feel about taking someones virginity? I would do it, but hopefully they’d let me know that it was their first time so I be more gentle with them.
51: Is there any food you would NOT recommend using during a sexual encounter? broccoli?
52: Would you rather be a pornstar or a prostitute? Either
53: Do you watch porn? I’m male...of course
54: Have you ever been called a freak? Why? Nope
55: Do you feel comfortable going “commando”? No problem at all
56: Would you have a problem with going down on someone if they hadn’t shaved their pubic hair? Done it many times.
57: If you could give yourself head, would you? Absolutely
58: Booty or Boobs? Boobs but booty is close behind
59: Have you ever cheated on someone? (Why?) Yes, because I am a horny pig.
60: If you were the other sex for a day, what are five things you would do? Play with my tits all day, make a naughty phone call to a random person, put on sexy lingerie and go clubbing, tease men by flashing and/or touching naughtily, take some guys home and get spit roasted.
61: have you ever watched someone masturbate? Yes, love to watch
62: has anyone ever watched you masturbate? Yes, love to show off a little
63. Have you ever had an erection and someone noticed? First time I got a massage and had to roll over. Also, when 18 while being rolled into surgery. They had given me meds to relax and as they wheeled me down the hall, the air blowing up my gown gave me a hardon. Last thing I remember before going under was a nurse saying, Oh my!
64. What is your method of masturbation? (ie. toys, clitorial, prostate) Toys for prostate occasionally, but usually just regular jerking, sometimes with lube or vibrator on my taint.
65. What is your bra/penis size? 6.5″, medium thick, large balls
66. What is the strangest thing you have ever put up your vagina/anus? string of Ben Wa balls
67. When was the last time you masturbated? 4 days ago
68. When was the last time you had sex? 3 weeks ago
69. When was the last time you watched porn? Just before I started this questionaire
70. Have you ever bought a sex toy? If so, which one did you buy last? First sex toy? If not, which one do you plan on buying when you do? Bought first one at 18, was a vibrator to use on my girlfriend. Last one I bought was probably a cock ring.
71. Guys:Circumsized? Yes
72. Which not-genital part of your body do you like being touched? My butt
73. Which genital part of your body do you like being touched? My balls
74. Girls:Are you able to achieve orgasm just through breast stimulation? N/A
75. Have you anonymously sent a sexual ask to someone on tumblr? No
76. When was the last time you have had a wet dream? A couple years ago
77. Which wet dream was your favorite? A woman seduced me while my wife was sleeping nearby.
78. Is there a friend you would willingly have sex with? No
79. Is there a celebrity/character you would willingly have sex with? Monica Bellucci
80. Favorite sexual position? Woman on top. Leaves my hands free to play
81. Do you like being called a slut or whore in bed? Yup, talk dirty please
82. Are you into any BDSM? Light BDSM
83. Have you ever wanted to have sex with someone but knew you couldn’t for any reason? Why? Who hasn’t? Didn’t want to screw up friendship. One or both of us was married.
84. Do you like dirty talk? Yes, yes I do
85. Are you loud or quiet during sex? Masturbation? Noisy, and you be too, please
86. Have you ever been interupted during sex or masturbation? Who/what? Sister’s friend walked into my room unannounced. Also, girlfriend’s sister caught me in the saddle with her sister in parked car.
87. What kind of porn do you like to watch? Almost any amateur porn...REAL amateur porn, not most of the BS on Pornhub. I’m a voyeur at heart.
88. Have you ever confessed to someone that you got an erection over them? What about masturbated to them? Confessed to jerking off about them. It was a male. Haven’t confessed to any females.
89. Have you ever masturbated because your sexual partner wasn’t there when you needed them? 99% of the time.
90. Have you ever had a one night stand? Do you still keep in contact with them? Yes, it was recent, so still in contact with him.
91. Have you ever had a friends with benefits? Are they still beneficial? Not an ongoing FWB.
92. Ask whatever you want
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“Greater Things Than These”
John Sawyer
Bedford Presbyterian Church
6 / 5 / 22 – Pentecost Sunday
Acts 2:1-4
John 14:8-17
“Greater Things Than These”
(It’s In Your Hands, Now)
Our 1986 Oldsmobile Custom Cruiser Station Wagon was a large car. “The Wagon,” as we called it, had dark red paint on the roof and hood, with faux woody sides on the doors. It had a V8 engine, was built like a tank, and weighed a ton (and a half). And, when I turned fifteen and got my learner’s driving permit, The Wagon was the car that I learned how to drive.
I can remember getting behind the wheel of The Wagon, fastening my seatbelt, and looking over at my father – sitting in the passenger seat. I was a bit nervous and he looked nervous, too. And during my time learning how to drive, I remember how Daddy and I would see some obstacle, or some car pulling out, or a pedestrian, or some brake lights ahead. And, upon seeing this, I would gently take my foot off of the accelerator and move it over to gently ride the brake. Meanwhile, Daddy was sitting in the passenger seat, stomping on the floor, trying to slam on the brakes – some brakes, any brakes – even though there was no brake pedal there. Alas, The Wagon did not have a factory or after-market brake pedal installed on the passenger side of the car. It’s a miracle that Daddy didn’t kick a hole in the floorboard while I was learning to drive.
Anyway, the day finally came when I got my real driver’s license. And I got in the car and drove . . . all by myself. I don’t remember exactly where I went first – maybe to the grocery store, maybe to a friend’s house – but I do remember getting behind the wheel and thinking, “They’re actually are going to let me do this? All on my own? Woah!”
If it hasn’t happened already, there will come a moment in your life when you’re going to have to do something on your own. And, maybe you’ll be ready for it. Or, maybe not.
In today’s scripture reading, Jesus is sitting at the table after a meal with his friends, the disciples, and he tells them that he is going to be going away. They will be on their own. Just to be clear, he has been telling them for quite some time that he will be leaving them, but they either haven’t believed him or haven’t wanted to believe him. And, right before today’s reading, Jesus tells his friends that if they want to get close to God, then Jesus is the way (and the truth, and the life) to get close to God.[1]
Several of Jesus’ friends – Thomas and Philip – have some questions about all of this, and so Jesus tries to clear it up for them. Eugene Peterson translates it in this way:
Believe me: I am in my Father and my Father is in me. If you can’t believe that, believe what you see – these works. The person who trusts me will not only do what I’m doing but even greater things, because I, on my way to the Father, am giving you the same work to do that I’ve been doing.[2]
In other words, Jesus and God the Father are part of each other – which, as our Confirmation Class talked about, is a difficult thing to understand. But even if we cannot understand it fully, that’s okay. What matters is: Jesus has given us a job to do – serving God with all that we are – and in doing this job (on our own as followers of Jesus), God will do great things through us. “If you have a hard time believing or understanding this,” Jesus says, “look at your own lives – the lives that you live by faith in me. You’ll not only do what I’m doing in your daily lives, but you’ll do even greater things.”
Let’s stop here, for a moment, because what on earth does Jesus mean when he says this? Are you and I able to work the signs and wonders and works that Jesus did? Even if we were able to do such things, here is Jesus telling us that we will do even greater things. Greater things than Jesus? Is this even possible? Or is Jesus just plain crazy for putting more trust in us and our abilities than we have in ourselves? You know, there was a song from years ago called “Jesus, Take the Wheel,”[3] but here Jesus seems to be telling us, “No, you take the wheel.” What, exactly, is going on here?
If you were listening carefully a moment ago when the text was read, you may have noticed that Jesus doesn’t just say, “You’ll do even greater things than these things I have done,” and leave it there. Instead, he goes on to say two important things:
1. “I will do whatever you ask in my name. . .” (14:13) and,
2. “If you love me, you will keep my commandments (to love one another) and I will ask the Father to give you another Advocate (another Helper), to be with you forever. This is the Spirit of truth . . . who abides with you and will be in you.” (14:15-17)
In other words, the only way that we will do what Jesus has done and do even greater things than these is because we’ll never really do them completely on our own. Jesus will always be listening for and answering our prayers. And the Holy Spirit will always be with us – steadfastly remaining with us forever.
God is with us – not just tracking us from afar on a cell phone to see where we are – but with us, always. And, because God is at work in and through so many of us in this Body of Christ – also known as the church – we are able to do so much more. Now, will any one of us, on our own, turn water into wine, or feed the five thousand, or raise someone from the dead, or make a new heaven and earth? Probably not – especially not on our own. But with the Spirit’s help – the Spirit that came rushing onto the disciples on the day of Pentecost – you and I – together – might just be able to offer people exactly what they need in the moment, and feed far more than five thousand, and lift someone out of the pit of despair, and build God’s new heaven right here on earth.
Those of you who are joining the church today and those of you who joined long ago are so filled with the Holy Spirit that, together, we will be vessels of grace – carrying God’s love out into a world that is so desperate to be loved with a love that lasts. And Jesus, who is always listening when we cry out for help, has already given us all that we need to do this job with the gift and help of the Holy Spirit. We do not go on our own. We go, surrounded with and filled by the Holy Spirit – prepared, equipped, and sent to be God’s people.
So, how ready do you feel for all of this? Look. . . for the most part, it might not be something overwhelmingly big that we are called to do: be kind, offer our help, be willing to work and serve and love, all the while listening and looking for signs of the Holy Spirit. Because the Holy Spirit will be there whether we’re looking or not. There will be times when we forget that the Spirit is with us. There will be times when we fall short. There will be times when God taps on the Spiritual brakes to get our attention. There will be times when we will feel all alone. But there will also be times when the Spirit gives us courage, and helps us to pray, and offers us just what we need to do the good things, the greater things that need to be done in Jesus’ name.
Are you ready for a life like this – a new life lived in and through the Holy Spirit? This is the life and calling that has been given to you, and to me, and yes, you and I are capable, and gifted, and ready.
Friends, trust in God – the One who created you, the One who saved you and fills you with grace at this Table, the One who abides in and with you, always. Yes, God is going to let you do this – but you’ll never be fully alone in the doing.
You know, it’s taken him a few years but my daddy has calmed down a bit since those dangerous early days of riding with me behind the wheel – dodging brake lights and orange barrels on the highway. Two weeks ago, I was driving the car in Atlanta, Georgia traffic with Daddy riding in the passenger seat and he only slammed on his imaginary brake twice. He did this, not to try to save himself, but because he wanted to protect me. In so many ways, even though my daddy has sent me off into the world to be on my own, he’ll always be my daddy and is always with me in spirit, wanting the best for me and hoping the best of me.
So it is with the Holy Spirit, but so much more so.
Friends, may you live and move and serve and love in the Holy Spirit – trusting in the Spirit to abide with you always.
In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
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[1] See John 14:6.
[2] Eugene Peterson, The Message – Numbered Edition (Colorado Springs: NAV Press, 2002) 1480. John 14:11-12.
[3] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jesus,_Take_the_Wheel.
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Sherlock Holmes - Kiss Me, Mr Detective
A/N - Season 1!Sherlock, the cutie. And friends to lovers. Two of my favourite things. I do not own Sherlock Holmes, the character, the universe, the adaptations or anything: this is a work of fiction set on the BBC adaptation of Sherlock. Did I still write 8.2k words (exactly) for it? Yes. I also don’t own the song or the lyrics used within, and if you fancy it, listen to ‘Kiss Me’ by Ed Sheeran while reading.
Warnings - Bad language. Mentions of murder and drug usage. Mild angst. Smut, loss of virginity, masturbation, oral m receiving, penetration, unprotected sex, so 18+.
Summary - After a fight with John leaves Sherlock feeling particularly down, he calls on the one person who is always there to support him. Only tonight, it’s different. Feelings come to a head, exploration ensues, but is this just a one time thing? That depends on whether she stays the night...
TO SHERLOCK, it’s just another normal day, whereas to John? He’d rather not admit how regularly these awful days roll around. Sure, the case didn’t go as well as it could’ve, and Sherlock admittedly could’ve made much more of an effort to comfort John after the apparent ‘heartbreak’ he endured. He just could not understand it. Why the hell was John so emotionally responsive to a case they’d been on for less than twenty four hours which turned out to be a bust anyway?
“You are absolutely unbelievable!”
“People die every day, John. You’ve killed people, as have I. It isn’t that great a surprise.” Sherlock deadpans, picking up his teacup, raising it to his lips, drawing a long sip from the warm liquid.
“Oh, yeah, of course. The proud, the cold untroubled heart of stone, that never mused on sorrow but its own.” John mocks. “Do you not even care that people are still dead despite the fact you solved the case?”
“They’d be dead either way,” he reiterates, “at least we got to them before they completely decomposed. Will me caring about them stop them from being dead? No, Dr Watson, it will not.”
“Sherlock!”
“John!” He mimics.
John slams his hands down on the desk, shaking the wood and everything resting on it, surely sending the vibrations through the floor and notifying Mrs Hudson of their ‘domestic’ as she so likes to call them. The buffalo even begins to swing. John’s tea is long forgotten, but Sherlock’s is keeping him grounded, calm, as John waggles his fist in Sherlock’s passive, blank face.
“You-” he pauses, gulping down breath. “You are a fucking machine, I can’t even deal with you right now. How dare you be so cold hearted and untroubled by this. You’re a disgrace.”
As if he hasn’t heard that one before, Sherlock scoffs.
Placing his teacup back down with a clink, he stands, the darkness of the night, of the room, closing in on them both. Nights like these really are danger nights, any night John leaves him. That’s what's coming next, but there isn’t a thing he knows to say or do to prevent the inevitable. He’ll simply just text Her instead, she’ll keep him grounded.
“Why? Emotional context? Emotion, whether of ridicule, anger, or sorrow, whether raised at a puppet show, a funeral, or a battle, is your grandest of levellers. The man who would be always superior should be always apathetic.”
With a huff like a bull, John viciously turns on his heel, blaspheming under his breath, cursing Sherlock out. He reaches for his coat and snatches it off the stand, slamming the door open.
“MACHINE.” John screams before pulling the door shut with a great slam, seething, the coat stand still rocking in his wake.
John’s footsteps thunder down the stairs, but before he’s even gone, Sherlock’s phone is withdrawn, and he’s tapping out a message.
Can you come over? Please? SH
It wouldn’t usually bother him as much. The case didn’t phase him, at all, but John’s opinion did. It always does. But today was a particularly long day of being brutish and rude, cold and distant, his usual and true self, but John’s more and more impatient with him now.
Being called a ‘machine’ is, again, nothing unusual, but this time it stings a little more than usual, especially after his recent arrest, and a fallout with Molly. He only has one person left, right now, who doesn’t hate him. His longest friend, the one he keeps away from it all so as to not tarnish her life with his misdeeds; Y/N, the one he can always rely on.
He knows she’s arrived by the sound of his window crashing open. Crawling up the bricks, skimming the drainpipe, latching onto the ivy; it’s her usual manner of entry. She never uses the door.
Putting his cups and saucers into the sink, he makes his way through the house, opening his bedroom door to find her already sitting there on the bed, her coat hung up on the hook, her work clothes clinging to her body.
“Hey there Mr Detective, you okay?” she asks as jovially as she can muster.
The way he ambles across the room, his dressing gown floating behind him, and slumps down onto the bed, instantly tells her he’s not okay at all. She can’t help but to look upon him sympathetically, edging a smidge closer to him, until he’s prompted enough to wrap his arms around her torso, finding his rightful place tangled around her. She knows him well enough - his past, and his current life - to realise she’s the only person he’s ever felt comfortable enough around to do this with, and that brings her a certain swelling pride in her bosom, one that doesn’t go unnoticed by Sherlock as he feels her skin heat up against his cheek.
It doesn’t take long, either, for his head to follow suit, burying into her chest. He’s always, always had a thing for her boobs, ever since they were in uni together.
That’s something so special about the two of them, he doesn’t have to say anything for her to know he’s not okay the way he does with everyone else. And naturally, he can read everything about her in a split second.
“I’m here, bud.”
Above all else, he just needs to know someone is there for him in moments like these. The world is cruel to him, and Y/N wishes more than anything that it wasn’t. Upon instinct, her hands stray, one to his back, pressing against the silk of his dressing gown, the other cradling his long neck, fingers knotting in the dark curls there.
She isn’t sure how long she stays there, simply holding him, feeling every twitch of his muscles, every breath of his against her skin, but she likes it. Of course she does, every time she likes it. Sherlock brings her an inordinate amount of comfort at the best of times, today is no exception, especially with what the day has held. Even when she’s the one comforting him, he doesn’t realise how much he helps her too.
His flat is so familiar, his bed as comfortable as her own. She knows his sock index, she’s studied his periodic table over his shoulder more times than she’d care to admit, and she even has her own toothbrush in the bathroom in case she has to pop over for an emergency freshen up. Sherlock has, and always will be, her first port of call, and that she remembers as she shifts further onto the quilted bedspread, her phone on his oak bedside locker.
His head begins to stir against her chest, his curls tickling her collarbones, small hums escaping his lips as he pushes himself up, his elegant yet trembling hands still splayed on her waist.
“I could feel your heart beating weirdly, what’s wrong?” he asks, quirking his eyebrows.
“Just the usual.” she vaguely replies.
Sherlock isn’t having it, though, and scans her a little more. “You’re still in your work clothes.”
“Great deduction. I was hoping you’d go a little deeper, though.”
“You hate wearing work clothes longer than necessary, which means you had plans straight after work, considering you finished… five hours ago? That’s your usual time for today. Counting overtime, forty five minutes, walk to your car, another ten, but your umbrella wasn’t working, round that up to an hour, leaving at 6. You arrived home, no, not home, at your boyfriend’s house for dinner. However, you’re not comfortable enough with one another yet for you to use his shower, or perhaps you are, but you elected not to, and stay in damp clothes that only had seventeen minutes to dry with the heater on in your car for the journey there. You ate dinner, Mexican, had a glass and a half of five percent wine, realised you couldn’t drive, but you didn’t particularly want to stay. Nonetheless you sat and watched the telly with him for hours, football, I can see the dreariness in your eyes. I know how much you hate it, and frankly, same. You stayed for almost all of the match, seeing as you’re now sober, but something else happened.” She lulls her head to the side, prompting him, her smile not meeting her eyes. “As soon as the match ended, he tried to make a move on you, he pressed his mouth to yours, he tried to push his hand up your skirt;” his throat bobs with a vicious gulp; despising the thought of anyone else laying a finger on her, “you swatted him away, rightfully so.”
He pauses a minute, his harsh tone of voice and his sharp face softening. He can see the vulnerability in her eyes, her walls about to crumble. This woman he appreciates so much. “He doesn’t deserve you.”
Smiling melancholically up at him, she brings her hand back to his hair, her fingers carding through the soft curls. His face buries back into her chest just as her voice offers a broken whisper, “I broke it off. I was the one who couldn’t commit this time.”
And as she lays her head on top of his, her breathing more shallow, resounding in her chest, he dwells over those very words. The way she said them, not to mention the words themselves, hold a myriad of meaning. What could she possibly-
Oh.
The subtext, yes, impeccable. She’s always had a way with implications and subtext, always knowing that the likelihood of him actually picking up on it is little to none. But now, now he’s become trained to her, her way of life, her way of thinking, her way of speaking. This is too good an opportunity to miss. If she means what he thinks she means, ever hopeful, then this is completely unfamiliar territory.
Gathering all of his courage in one deep breath, he begins to pepper kisses on her skin. The faintest brush of his lips on the tops of her breasts, all that’s available to him with her shirt the way it is. He feels her heart flutter, her breathing stutter, but despite the chemical flush of her chest, he still isn’t quite sure she likes it. Not until he feels her grip on his hair increase, and he glances up to see her head thrown back. Her spine delicately arches against his hand, thrusting her chest further into his face.
His nimble fingers reach for her buttons, undoing the top two, giving him space enough to find the valley between her breasts. Lathering kisses there, licking the swells of her boobs, his tongue pulsates with the increased thrumming of her heart. The sensation is new, so unbridled, and he doesn’t quite know what to do with the stirring in his loins right about now. That unknowing is only further amplified by the sound that rips from her chest when he involuntarily bites down on the supple flesh. It couldn’t be… a moan?
Sure, he understands the chemistry of it, the reactions that occur in the synapses of the brain, the pheromones and hormones released when one is aroused, but this is all new to him. And, from his embarrassingly basic level of theory, surely that doesn’t start until some more stimulation on other parts of the body commence? Nipples, perhaps something lower down… then again, what does Sherlock know?
Of course it’s an intimate moment, the closest he’s been to a woman before, and maybe that’s why he freezes, stops, and she tugs his head up by his hair, her gentle, pleasured smile with her lips softly parted deepening the look of bewilderment painted onto his face. Her eyes are twinkling, alight with an excitement he hasn’t seen for far too long.
“What are you doing?” she whispers.
He shrugs his shoulders with a sudden force, his dressing gown falling off a little. “I don’t know. But now I feel like I read your pining words all wrong.”
She gasps, a wheezing sound, sucking the air from the room. She smacks his arm gently, muffled by his button-down and dressing gown. “I wasn’t pining! I was saying.”
“Hmm, same difference.”
Everyone must acquiesce when it comes to Sherlock Holmes. “But no, you didn’t read them wrong at all, but I know you don’t see me that way, you don’t feel things that way.”
He pauses, his beautiful plump lips pursed, fidgeting on the bed. Brushing her hair off her face reveals the pain she expressed. However, her eyes glued on his, sadness is betrayed in every line of his young, clean-shaven face. His entire bone structure is taking a nosedive.
“For you, I’ve been feeling everything from hate to love to lust, and I guess that’s how I know I want to hold you close.”
“Sherlock...” she whispers, her singular word an inflection of surprise.
Never tearing his eyes from her, his hand comes up to her cheek, rubbing his thumb over the slightly blushing skin, searching her face, with his big blue eyes, for a shred of reluctance. But, all he sees is her, so he elects to do what his heart is yelling at him to do for once, and kisses her breathless. His full lips holding hers, his one hand on her face, the other still wrapped around her back. Hers fly around his neck, clinging to him for dear life.
It doesn’t take long, their movements steadily heating, for their previously slow, intimate kiss to grow into something more, Y/N pulling herself up from the bed and making herself comfortable on Sherlock’s lap. His breath hitches in his throat, a cute little hiccupping sound escaping his lips in between embraces.
As much as he loves just this, soft caressing and gentle petting, he just knows she wants more. He does too, that much is evident from the length prodding at Y/N’s inner thigh as she moves gently on his lap. She won’t make a move, though, he’s too inexperienced, and she’s too much of a sweetheart to corrupt him, so she thinks. Ever since he first saw her, she’s been corrupting him slowly. He didn’t realise at first, but over the years, he began to understand, and now he’s in too deep.
For Y/N? It’s always been him. Every breakup she’s had, she’ll come to Sherlock’s flat, full well knowing the real reason she broke up with them, because she couldn’t commit, because she was too caught up on him.
Skimming his hands beneath her shirt, he savours the press of his hands on her bare skin, warmth seeping from her body into his, his fingers dancing along her spine. Electricity shocks her in bursts, unlike anything else, from his touch alone.
“May I take your shirt off?” he asks.
“Fuck, yes.” she groans. “May I do yours?”
“Be my guest.”
In a tangle of limbs, a few buttons pop off, and eventually, two shirts make it out the other side, tossed from the bed and into the laundry pile. Aka Sherlock’s floor. He’s like that: sock indexes, yet he won’t get a hamper. A walking contrast.
His thumbs press beneath the band of her bra, savouring the pressure of the flesh that falls into his hands, but that’s as far as he gets.
“Never undone a bra before?”
He shakes his head sheepishly. “I know the theory. Just… you always wear peculiar ones.”
“I wear relatively normal bras, and this one is certainly bog standard. Had I known you’d be undressing me Mr Detective, I’d have worn something nicer.”
“Just do it for me.” He requests, chuckling.
She unfastens her bra, and allows her breasts to spill from the cups, into Sherlock’s awaiting hands. The gasp that erupts from him sends Y/N’s brain into overdrive. He’s cupped her chest through her shirt before, buried his nose into her cleavage countless times, but never before have they had such skin on skin contact. Her lips press to his neck, shifting her closer to him. Sucking on his pressure point, she receives a similar gasp in response, only this one is more guttural, more a sound of pleasure than surprise. He’s wilting from a single kiss to his neck.
“Has no one ever given you a hickey?” She husks in his ear, her voice alone sending tremors down his spine.
“N- fuck, no.”
“I’ll make it worth it. All of this.”
“I know you will.”
She fuses her lips onto his again, savouring the faint hesitations as he grapples with his breath, eager to get some control on his mind with all that’s happening. Never did she ever think Sherlock would be here beneath her, his rough fingertips brushing over her peaked buds, and his palms dancing over her waist. Never did she think she’d hear him whisper his next words, either, not in a million years.
“More.” he pleads. “Can we do… more? Whatever that entails?”
“That depends what you want to do.”
“Get me out of these damn trousers. They're rather uncomfortable.”
She snorts lightly, a piggy like sound, the one they bonded over all those years ago. “I can feel why.”
“I imagine you want out of your work trousers, too.”
“God, yes; they’re ghastly.”
“I don’t think so.” he hums. “You look nice.”
Her cheeks begin to burn, blood rushing to colour them, betraying her true feelings, but as he tweaks her nose playfully, the little snort escapes again.
They were in the dining hall, second week of university, almost ten years ago, and Y/N was sitting with her friends, downing enough coffee to sink a ship, eating her hangover away, when her friends decided to make her laugh with tales of last night's drunken events. Unbeknownst to her, one of the greatest minds of the twenty-first century was sitting just a few seats down on the half-empty bench, watching her perceptively in his periphery. That’s when he first heard the sound. The cutest thing, and it startled him into action, beginning his deductions almost instantly. Admittedly, her student ID on the table aided him a little.
He shocked her from her haze, too, as soon as he spoke her name.
“Y/N, eighteen, jurisprudence first year, freshers week over with. You left a boyfriend back home, but you’re more sad about leaving your dog, as I would be. You don’t particularly care about law but know it’s a good undergraduate to receive anyway. Dyed hair, extrovert, killer hangover, and apparently there’s a little piggy living inside your nose. Sherlock Holmes, would you like some aspirin?”
“That’s weird; what are you, some kind of detective?” She asked, sans malice, a playful bounce to her words.
“Chemistry, going for a masters. But I do like the mystery, yes.”
“So you’re… bright. Nice to meet you, Sherlock, and it seems you know almost everything you need to know about me. But yes, I will take that aspirin, if you don’t mind. How was your weekend?”
He smiled at her, the first true smile he’d given in a long time. “It was nice, thank you.”
And thus a friendship was born, all because he heard her little piggy snort.
Her slender fingers work wonders with the fastener and zip of his suit trousers, and even manage hers too, all within the space of a few seconds, but Sherlock is reluctant to let her go, even just to get her trousers off.
“I need to sit up, just for a minute.”
“No.” Sherlock commands, insistent. “We can make this work.”
“Sure we can, but it won’t be very comfortable. Come on.”
She’s barely peeled away from him and wrestled hers off before he’s drawing her back in for a kiss, his trousers settled just above his knees.
“Sherlock,” she protests, mumbling against his lips, her hands on his heavenly, broad, muscular shoulders. “Sher!”
Her squeal at his sudden tug on her panties disappears, captured by his eager mouth. And in fact, her panties seem to disappear along with it, thanks to Sherlock’s swift movements and nimble hands. Maybe he’s had some experience to be so good at this…
“You sure you wanna go this far?”
“More sure than I’ve ever been. I need you.”
He takes a deep inhale, dropping his forehead against hers, his breathing coming out in bursts as he tries to get a grasp on the situation. “Kiss me.”
She doesn’t need to be told twice, instantly getting to work on the waistband of his boxers as his tongue lavishes her own. His hips rise briefly, just long enough for her to tug the elasticated material from around him, slipping past her, and then he kicks it into their growing pile of clothes. His length falls into her awaiting palm, and-
“Wow.” She exhales in amazement. “If I’d known you were packing this much, I’d have jumped you long ago.”
“No you wouldn’t.”
“Absolutely not, until tonight I thought you’d just laugh at me.”
He pecks her lips affectionately, “Never. You’re bloody beautiful, I’ll let you do anything to me.”
“Hmm, anything, you say?”
Stifling a chuckle against her neck, he recommences, “Maybe not anything.”
Yeah, that's definitely the right call. Still, she finds herself all but clawing at him, her breath hovering teasingly just over his lips, their noses touching, her hands clamped to his cheeks, feeling the building heat there. She must be making such a mess of his bed right about now, but for one night? It can’t matter.
This is a one time thing, it has to be. Sherlock just needs to release some tension, she just so happens to be there. Still, she can’t prevent the little glimmer of hope shining through at the possibility of this being a more-than-one-time thing. The moral compunctions of their friendship after this don’t matter anymore, because he’s leaving a fire in his wake, his delicious fingertips digging bruisingly into her bum before trailing lightly up her spine, skimming her shoulder, brushing her neck - arched for him to reach where he wants, able to mark her as his own - and finally slipping over her lips, taken obediently by her awaiting mouth. Christ, if there’s one thing she hopes for tonight, it’s that his actions never relent.
Whether it’s what he intends to happen or not, his fingers in her mouth give her an idea, one she prays he goes along with at least a little, so she pulls away. The dirty, telling smile on her face hints at what she’s about to do, lending Sherlock to shift a little more up the bed, his eyes following her every move. Hands splayed on his thighs, her small fingers gripping onto the fine hairs there, she begins to take his tip into her mouth, never once breaking eye contact with him. Yeah, this is what’ll drive him insane.
Inch by inch, she takes him into the welcoming heat of her mouth, pulling off slowly, only to go down again. She adds her tongue into the mix at some point, too, and her hand, on what she can’t reach, tickling his balls, but further than that, his mind is blank. Hot white, washed with pleasure. The sounds he emits are other worldly, so much that he has to muffle himself with his own hand; what would Mrs Hudson say? He’s always had such control over his mind and body, but this… he’s slowly losing all semblance of control, and he’s not even mad about it. What he does know is that there’s a building heat in his abdomen, a coil about to spring, and his cock is beginning to twitch. If she keeps going this incredible way, her teeth grazing him ever so gently, adding another new sensation into the mix, he’s inexorably going to finish before he can help it.
“As much as I adore your torturous ministrations, I think I need to be inside you…” He husks, his voice deep.
A smirk gracing her lips, she looks up at him through half-lidded eyes, mischief glinting in her pretty little mesmerising eyes for a second, before she hollows her cheeks and takes him wholly, allowing his length to slip partially down her throat. Her moan reverberates around him, and Sherlock begins to thrash above her, scrunching the duvet in his hands, not caring if it creases. If there’s one thing Sherlock hates, it’s creases. And being called a machine by his best friend. Right now, though, it seems as though every misstep in his day has led him here, into the welcoming heat of Y/N’s mouth, taking him so eagerly, her tongue lapping at the vein on the underside of his dick, a string of saliva remaining as she pulls away.
“I think you’ve got a couple of rounds in you, Mr Detective. Can you do that for me?”
“Y-yes.” He stammers, his head tossed back in pure ecstasy a moment later as she begins to work on the head with kitten licks. “But… can I s- fuck me, say something?”
“I plan on it.” she chuckles, “anything.”
She goes back to peppering kisses all over his member, tip to base, brushing his balls, working her way back up.
“Touch yourself f- for me.”
“What? Why?”
Her tone is more inquisitive than anything else, but upon that playfully rueful look in his lust-darkened baby blue eyes, she knows he’s going to get her back for this little display, and he’s just worked out how. It works both ways, she can prepare herself for what’s to come next while pleasuring him. And he gets to watch. It’s a win-win for him. Maybe he likes this sex thing a little more than he’s letting on.
“Are you sure you want me to? I’ll just make a mess on your sheets, Sher.”
She swallows him again, bobbing her head up and down on his length a few times while he grapples with literal reality. He’s teetering on the edge. One more move, and he’s a goner. His head is already against the wall, lolled there.
“I don’t care about the sheets, darling, I need you ready for me.”
She gulps, nods, and reaches one hand around her, skimming over her stomach, until it nestles between her thighs. She rubs her thumb over his tip, collecting the pre-come beading there, while she rubs over her throbbing pearl, pressing softly. Then, as she inches down on his cock, taking him in her mouth, she also collects the slick from between her thighs, and uses it as a lube to push a finger inside herself. Of all the times she’s touched herself, she never imagined, even in her wild Sherlock fantasies, that she’d be doing it with his dick down her throat. With every bob of her head, she scissors herself more, sinking back onto her fingers.
“I think I’m-” Sherlock begins to say, his words cut off by an utterly obscene moan splitting the air.
She hastily abandons her one post, and wraps both of her hands around his girth, working on what she can’t fit into her mouth with her increased speed, licking and suckling his head as he begins to fall apart, coming, with a scream, down her throat, his one hand clamped over his mouth, biting down harshly to silence his cries; the other buried in her hair.
His whole body falls lax, completely spent, meanwhile, Y/N savours every drop she’s been able to draw from him. He softens in her mouth, allowing her change to slip away from him, grasping a tissue from the bedside to wipe away any excess. That’s certainly something she never thought would happen…
He’s calm, though, smiling lazily through hooded eyes, his breathing regulated once more, making beckoning motions to her with his big hands. He’s placated, though, and sliding her hands into his, she’s allowed time enough to get into place, smiling softly at him, raking her fingers over his scalp in a comforting way. Even as she sits herself on his lap, she can feel him hardening beneath her ass, slowly but surely. She was right about him, he’s definitely got another round in him.
“Do you have a condom?” he asks.
“No, sweetheart, they’re in my other bag. I didn’t plan on getting any for a while… do you?”
“Not in here, that I’m aware of. John may have stashed some in my less favoured dressing gowns or socks, and he definitely has some upstairs, but I’m unawares.”
“I’m gonna sound crazy here, but do we need one?” She says hesitantly. His eyes widen, he cocks his head to the side. “I was tested after my last partner, I’m clean, and on birth control. You’re a virgin. There’s no point, is there?”
“You have a considerably good point.”
With that, energy rejuvenated a little, he wraps an arm around her body, flipping them over so he’s on top, shadowing her, looming over her, gazing down at every inch of her naked beauty.
“Take your time. I’ll be your safety.”
“I know.” he whispers, a tearful smile making its way onto her face. “Thank you.”
He needn’t say more, because she already knows why she’s being thanked. For her kindness, for making him so comfortable, for accepting the fact he’s still a virgin in his late twenties and, if he’s being honest, has no damn clue what the practicality and reality of sex is. Sure, he’s seen porn. He’s also looked at John’s laptop. But that doesn’t prepare one for when the moment comes. It’s like all of that goes out the window, and he simply remembers the first time he opened a biology textbook at secondary school, pictures of flushed organs staring back at him, desperately waiting to be relieved. That’s what his own coock is like right now, already hard again, virtually pulsating with hunger in his palm. He strokes himself a couple of times, glancing down at Y/N’s wide eyes.
“Are you okay? Can I…”
“Yes, Sherlock,” she chuckles, “whenever you’re ready.”
Now, he thinks. He rubs two digits through her folds, gathering her wetness, enamoured with the way it glistens on his fingertips. Tentatively, he brings his fingers up to his mouth, swirling his tongue around them to get a taste. Eyes rolling into the back of his head, he moans. She’s better than any cup of tea he’s ever had.
His cock slaps against his lower stomach pleadingly, so he grasps it in his hand, and begins to enter her, pushing gently, feeling every flutter of her walls. Her arms fly out, hands grasping his shoulders, nails leaving crescent moons in their wake at the delicious stretch. It’s nothing like they’ve ever felt before.
“Can I move?” He asks, balls deep inside her, their pelvises flush against one another.
“Please.” She all but begs.
Before doing anything else, Sherlock hooks one strong arm around her body, malleable in his hands, and holds her chest against his. Her breasts push into his skin, her nipples gaining friction from the dusting of hair there. Her one hand cups his slender neck, the other, his sharp cheek. Their eyes meet in a fierce gaze of burning intensity, and he begins to move. Slow, calculated, sharp thrusts punctuate her core. With every heavenly stroke, he can feel the ridges in her velvet walls, squeezing around him unwittingly.
“Jesus,” she cries, her clutch increasing.
“Hmm, not quite.”
The smirk in his words is quite literally audible. He’s so cocky, so full of himself, and fuck if she can’t feel another gush of arousal coursing through her, drenching his cock. How does he manage to be so attractive when he’s so dishevelled?
“Is that good?” He asks, unsure.
“So good.”
She brings her legs up, skimming the clenched backs of his thighs, until they wrap around him, drawing his hips into her at a new and improved angle. Heels digging into the base of his spine, he begins to move with a new purpose, his thrusts more passionate as his breath is drained from him by her kisses, his eyes alight with a new flame.
“Oh my God, Sherlock.” She pants, pulling him in for a kiss he greedily returns.
He drives his hips deeper, squeezing his fingertips into her supple waist bruisingly. It’ll be a mark that she belonged to him once, even just for one night. That’s when he reaches that special spongy spot that makes her entire body buckle. She all but screams, pressing into him wholly.
The coil is building, ready to break. He seems to be nearing the edge, too, his member twitching inside her when he buries himself particularly deep. She’s oh so fucking close… She licks into his mouth filthily, desperately clashing her teeth with his, eager for his kisses to tide her over. Silence her. Shifting his supporting hand, he trails one dextrous finger around to circle her clit, adding the faintest pressure for a moment. She mewls as he groans into her hot skin, clawing at him, entirely at his whim. Now he knows where to press, he settled his grip back around her, and draws her in close. This time around, he bends his knees a little more to measure his movements more carefully, ensuring that he ruts up and brushes her sensitive bud with his pelvis, helped by the extra friction of his neatly trimmed pubic hair on every thrust within her, his tip just scraping her g-spot.
“I- Sherlock, please tell me you’re- oh sweet mercy- close.”
He grunts softly in her ear. “So close.”
Their lips meet tenderly, passionately, in what they acknowledge to be a final kiss, moans mixing between them, savoured by the other.
His thighs clench, her legs tighten around his waist, and finally, her sweet walls flutter, squeezing him as she reaches her climax, his not following long after, spilling inside her, painting her soft walls white, marking her.
“Y/N,” he cries in ecstasy as his orgasm reaches him.
“Sher…” she repeats, her saving grace as pleasure washes over her entirely.
Their whole bodies wind up pressed together, bound together as one, skin on skin completely, becoming one another.
He lets her down gently, unravelling his grip, unsurprised when their sweaty skin sticks together. Her long legs unfurl, splaying in a butterfly. Sherlock tumbles ungracefully away, somehow landing with a certain gangly elegance on the space of mattress beside her, his arm instinctively flying over to place on her stomach, the skin hot and flushed red. Her chest moves hastily up and down with the thrumming of her heart, while his barely shifts despite his shallow breaths, his white skin glistening in the moonlight.
“Are you okay?” He huffs, turning on his side. “You look pretty fucked out.”
His baby blue eyes train instantly on her nipples, hard in the open air. This is the first notifier, the first inkling she has to feel self conscious, so she draws the sheet up around her as best as she can. Sherlock’s not having any of it, taking a stronghold on her arms, and pulling her until she’s lying on him, naught to separate them.
“I’ve never been this close to anyone physically and y'know.” He hums tiredly. She’s never heard him sound tired before…
She smiles up at him as best she can, “Are you glad?”
He begins to hold her ever closer, squeezing her tighter, feeling every ridge of her body.
“I’m so glad that you were my first, in so many ways.”
Praise from Sherlock is a rarity, and she’ll take it as and when she can, savouring every moment, this time by holding him like a koala, her grip not wavering.
“I’m glad too, Mr Detective.”
He brushes a kiss to her cheek, “As much as I like this, we need to get you cleaned up.”
A supporting arm beneath her bum, he picks her up, and unsteadily ambles into the bathroom.
“I don’t know much about this, but I know you should probably use the toilet, should you want to avoid a UTI, so if you’d like me to leave…”
He sets her down on the loo seat, cupping his hands over his nether regions, and he hurries to grasp for things, until she puts her hand on his arm, squeezing in a conciliatory manner.
“You do remember the camping trip, don’t you? You really don’t have to leave just because I have to pee, you never did before. In fact, you frequently annoyed me with it if you had a particular point to make, steadfastly refusing to leave the bathroom after following me in there when I went to pee. Why does this change anything?”
He shrugs, dropping whatever was in his arms, “It just doesn’t feel the same now, though.”
“Ooo, and now Mr Detective feels things.” She jokes, poking at his ribs.
He recoils, chuckling with her, “Only for you.”
As Y/N washes her hand, Sherlock begins to wrangle with a floorboard, clattering about until he eventually pulls out a small lock box, from which he withdraws a packet of brand new marks-and-spencer's ladies briefs.
“Why the fuck do you have these? Anything you wanna tell me?” she asks, eyes wide.
“John’s idea. He has plenty of girls over here who frequently stay the night, simply a precautionary error.” He takes a beat, gargling with some mouthwash, “they’re clean, new, I just don’t like the idea of you in dirty underwear, and I know how reluctant you are to go without them whenever you’re not in your own bed. I stayed with you enough nights in university to know that.”
Those nights were awfully painful. She’d take the floor, he’d take the bed, and every time she’d have to wash the sheets. He’d sweat and vomit, shake and cry, plead for the pain to be over. He wouldn’t go to hospital, he wouldn’t call his brother, he’d just turn up on her doorstep, high as a kite, almost in tears, knowing he’d gone a little too far. And each time, it was a little farther.
“Thank you, Sherlock.”
She takes them from him, and begins to shimmy them up her legs, only prevented by Sherlock moving to grab a handful of her arse.
“Hmm, I like this. Fancy another round?” He smirks.
“I’m too tired, babe. Give me a bit.”
He can see the lazy smile on her face, the tiredness in her pretty eyes, so he wets a flannel, and begins to clean her up with gentle movements between tender kisses.
“How do you know how to do all of this?” She asks, inquisitive more than anything.
“Instinct, I suppose. I never read or learned about it, seeing as I never thought it would happen.”
She snaps the waistband before moving her hands to his waist, leaning up onto her toes to reach him, kissing her softly.
“Look at you now.”
After brushing their teeth in an amicable silence, their pinky fingers overlapping on the porcelain of the sink, he aids her back to the bedroom, settling her on the bed. She has things here: deodorant, toothbrush, moisturiser, and yet somehow she doesn’t have underwear, even after all these years. Perhaps that's one too many things to explain…
With superfluous extravagance, he throws her his shirt, offering her a wry wink. She finds a blush clawing its way onto her cheeks, dumbfounded. It smells like him, just like a forest glade if it was rained on by tea and cigarettes. Maybe he’ll let her keep it as a memory.
In such a short amount of time, she’s learnt that he has a very sensitive neck. Very. A single kiss there has him biting back a moan. A low one at that, considering his deep voice also drops almost an octave when he’s aroused. His nipples are almost as sensitive as his neck, and he rather likes it when she tugs on them unwittingly.
His first orgasm comes quickly, but his refractory period is astonishing, and it takes longer to achieve a second high, long enough to make her come more than once, she assumes, though her first orgasm was mind blowing enough for two. Perhaps that’s just because it’s his first time, but it’s impressive nonetheless.
What’s the point in learning all of this if, once he comes around from his post-orgasmic haze, he’ll pretend like it never happened, in typical Sherlock style?
The shirt, though a small gesture, means a lot, and her vision begins to cloud as she looks down at the black cotton.
“You mean you want me to stay?” She croaks.
Sherlock turns to her from his set of drawers, his face full of apparent obviousness, brows furrowed in that cute bewildered way.
“Of course I want you to stay.” He states, like it’s the plainest thing in the world, like it’s stupid for her to even ask. But she’s silent, and when she says nothing in response, he launches into a long winded explanation: don’t show sentiment. “I- I just mean, i-it’s midnight, I’m not having you out in London alone. You stay with me. Only if you want to as well...”
She nods eagerly, “Yes. Yeah, course I want to stay.”
He all but leaps access the room, jumping onto the bed, before planting a proper smooch on her lips, grinning down at her. He slips into his usual side of the bed, and she takes hers, rolling to look at him.
“Don’t get cold.” He warns, tucking the duvet up around her shoulders. She giggles like a child, that small snort sounding again, prompting Sherlock to press his thumb to her nose like a button. “How are you… feeling?”
“I’m fine bub, really. That bloke doesn’t matter to me at all. Bit of a scumbag if I’m honest. You’re the one I’m with, the one I wanna talk about. How are you feeling? Must’ve been a pretty big blow up with John for you to call me and be so... teary.”
He sighs, crestfallen, “He called me a machine.”
Her gasp pierces the air, her hand flying to his hair, stroking in consolation, cooing senseless reassurances to him. She’s done this innumerable times, but now it feels different, like there’s no barrier.
“He’s done it so many times that it needn’t bother me anymore, but the way he looked at me, like I was this abhorrent monster, especially after the day and the disappointing case we had, it got to me. I hate having feelings.”
“You don’t have to hide them with me, though.”
He hums gently, burying into her chest. “I know. That’s why I treasure you so dearly.”
“That means you also have to trust me, and you’re not going to like what I have to say.” His chest heaves, shifting her whole body. That’s his way of giving in. “Please just talk to John. You know that whenever he leaves, he’ll come back, and try to pretend it never happened. He needs to know you’re human and that he upset you, but also that the case upset you as well. No one’s superhuman, and once you let John in on the fact that you’re not a machine, things between you will be so much easier, because you might agree for once.”
“I suppose you’re right.” He grumbles.
He pulls her into his warmth, hooking her leg around his as he snakes his arms around her back, breathing deeply from the crook of her shoulder. She begins to pepper kisses on his salty skin, savouring the taste with every small swipe of her tongue.
“Your heart’s against my chest, your lips pressed to my neck,” he breaks off with a faint whimper when she sucks a little harder, “I’m falling for your eyes, but they don’t know me yet.”
“Of course they do,” she whispers brokenly, hoarsely, “they’ve always known you.” She swallows thickly, “Does that mean it’s a feeling you’ll forget?”
“No, I don’t think I ever can.”
The silent words that pass between them both are so special, too special to be spoken aloud. ‘Think I’m in love now.’
“Kiss me like you wanna be loved.” He begs.
And really, who is Y/N to deny him? They just stay that way a little while, revelling in their lazy kisses, until she begins to fall asleep. It isn’t the first time she’s fallen asleep in his bed, not by any means, but it’s the first time she’s fallen asleep in his arms. She isn’t mad about it.
“Settle down with me, cover me up, cuddle me in. You were made to keep my body warm.” She smiles into her words, and embeds herself into him, entirely covered by the duvet, spattered in his kisses, safe in his arms. Sherlock feels safe with her legs around him, her fingers in his curls, holding himself against her. Amicable silence is how they drift off, Peaceful.
John re-enters 221B at a respectable hour. He got a fair amount of sleep on Greg’s sofa, having no girlfriend in the picture right now, but not enough to deal with Sherlock just yet. Not before his coffee. He expects to see Sherlock sitting in the exact same spot as when he left, perhaps just with a refill of tea, his fingers still steepled beneath his chin, eyes closed yet wide awake. Instead, he arrives at a seemingly empty, considerably clean flat, with no Sherlock in sight. Perhaps the unsleeping man must actually be asleep, he thinks, so he quietens down, and toes off his shoes before wandering farther into the flat. Even if the man does piss him off extraordinary amounts, perhaps he should just check he’s okay…
He gives the bedroom door a quiet rap, listening in momentarily before pushing it open. Frankly, he’d rather have found Sherlock with a cigarette in hand and the whole flat torn to shreds for the level of surprise he gets upon reaching the bed. His first idea is to scream bloody murder, but that might annoy Mrs Hudson, and upon stepping closer, even in the sliver of daylight through the curtains, he sees the duvet riding down a little. The last thing in the world he ever thought he’d see: Sherlock in naught but boxers pressed against a half naked woman, his palm splayed on her bare thigh. Sherlock? Spooning? It seems so, his entire body pressed to this woman. John feels himself go rigid, his feet glued to the floor, his gaze unmoving from shock.
It takes his phone to buzz in his pocket to get him moving, and when he does, all he tries to do is balance precariously on his tip toes in a wry attempt to get a birds-eye view of the whole thing. He’s not disappointed, or disturbed, once he does, though, his army agility proving useful. Sherlock’s hand is holding her, fingers entwined, just next to her chest. He wonders how comfortable it is, but if they’re staying this way, it can’t be too bad. Maybe all Sherlock needed to loosen up was a good shag.
She’s wearing his shirt, too; Sherlock’s black dress shirt from the previous day. And Sherlock? He never seeps in anything less than a full set of pyjamas, he’s weird like that .
This girl begins to stir, her lips parting gently, small hums escaping. Next, her eyelids flutter, and her hair shifts on the pillow. He didn’t make any noise, did he? John was specifically careful not to, just in case. He doesn’t fancy Sherlock’s wrath just yet.
One eye opens, and she whispers, almost incoherently, “Hi John.”
How she knows his name and who he is, he’s not at all sure, because he doesn’t think he’s ever seen this face in his life. The hair is familiar, and maybe, if she were more awake, he’d recognise her smile, but he’s never seen a woman in Sherlock’s company beside Molly Hooper. Speaking of…
Before he can even say anything, though, before he can ask who she is or if she wants tea or if she date-raped his roommate, she’s mumbling, and detaching her hand from Sherlock’s, rolling over. Dumbfounded, John just stands there and watches her cuddle into Sherlock’s chest, her arms wrapping around his torso like second nature. Even in his sleep, not consciously thinking about his actions, he grips her back - one hand resting just above her bum, and buries his nose into her neck.
John can’t help but smile to himself. Maybe their fight was for the best if Sherlock now has a girlfriend, someone he turned to for solace. So, he grasps for the top of the duvet and pulls it up over both of their figures, reaching their shoulders, and leaves, staring wistfully for a brief moment at the seemingly happy couple.
The weight of the duvet of what startles Sherlock, though, stirring him a little, inviting him to him against Y/N’s skin, smiling with eyes barely open. This is really nice, he thinks to himself, not waking up alone.
She smiles back blearily, and in her morning voice, whispers to him, “Kiss me Mr Detective.”
#sherlock#sherlock holmes#bbc sherlock#johnlock#sherlolly#mystrade#sherlock smut#sherlock fanfic#sherlock imagine#sherlock holmes imagine#sherlock holmes smut#william sherlock scott holmes#mycroft holmes#molly hooper#dr john watson#sherlock bbc#john watson#sherlock x oc#sherlock x reader#sherlock fluff#sherlock angst#sherlock fic
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49%
Title: 49%
Summary: If there’s one thing that Spencer hates more than rejection, it’s spontaneity. But sometimes the things (and people) we love outweigh the things that we hate. AKA a series of events leading up to a weekend wedding between the BAU’s finest Dr. Spencer Reid and his partner in crime, Y/N.
Word Count: 1365
Warnings: none
Author’s Note: I hope that you enjoy reading this! I really appreciate all of the support and kind words :)
49%
Spencer Reid is terrified. Nothing could compare for the pure fear that courses through his veins in this moment. Not even the times he’d run into hostage situations without wearing a Kevlar vest or even in the most lonely parts of his life. He figures that he’s terrified because he has so much to lose. Never in his life did he have someone that loves him as much as Y/N does. And that terrifies him. Somehow, when Spencer is with Y/N he’s simultaneously a man numb with love and a little boy shaking with fear. He knows that he should have gotten over this fear of rejection years ago. He knows that Y/N would never intentionally hurt him. He knows that she loves him more than anything.
So why? Why is he so terrified to ask her to marry him? Logically, there’s no reason for her to say no. They’ve been together for 3 years, which is long enough at their age to enter into an engagement. It’s not like she doesn’t want to get married; he’s seen her Pinterest wedding moodboard. She talks about their children, almost like they're already here. She wants to get married and she wants to have kids, but the question that bounces around in Spencer’s mind is does she want that with him?
“Next!” the barista calls Spencer forward to the counter to order.
“Hi, I’ll have an extra large black coffee with 6 Splendas, and uh, a large iced green tea with honey,” Spencer orders, pulling out his credit card to pay for the drinks. Coffee is probably not the wisest choice, but what can Spencer say the heart wants what the heart wants.
Spencer awkwardly waits for his drinks, trying to ignore the small box that burns a whole in his pocket. He’d bought the ring a couple of months ago, right after a case that both of them almost didn’t come home, or worse almost came home in a casket.
“Two drinks for Spencer!” a barista from behind the counter calls, telling him that his drinks are ready. Spencer takes a sip of his coffee, the sweet liquid burning his tongue. Taking a look at the time on his watch, Spencer decides that it’s time to head to the park.
It’s a short walk to the park, but it seems like it’s the longest walk of his life. Maybe if he wasn’t so nervous or terrified, he'd be able to enjoy how beautiful was. Spencer might be a complete ball of nerves, but he’s a romantic at heart. He wants this to be a perfect start to their perfect life. He finds the park bench that he told Y/N to meet him at. He sits there, waiting for her to show up and waiting for their life to start.
Spencer’s leg bounces up and down. He should have worn a different pair of shoes. These Converse are so old and ratty, he thinks. He thinks he looks ridiculous in his cardigan and corduroy pants, what was he thinking? He can’t actually expect that she’s going to yes to him.
While his thoughts are occupied by the constant inner commentary of rejection and ridicule, he fails to her the leaves crunch behind him. His vision goes black when his eyes are covered by a pair of familiar feeling hands. Y/N’s laugh gives it away instantly, but Spencer’s constant vigilance does cause him to yelp in a high pitched squeal.
“Spencer! It’s me honey,” Y/N says, wrapping her arms around his neck and peppering his cheek with quick kisses. It’s the kind of kisses that say “I’m happy to see you” and “You’re the only one I want to see”. It’s at times like these that he doubts his doubts; maybe he can have faith and hope and lean into the romantic side of himself. The side of himself that sees them walking in the park with a baby stroller, playing on the playset with their children, teaching their kids how to drive in the parking lot and sitting on this bench when their backs hurt all the time and their faces have a few more wrinkles.
“I’d know that laugh anywhere, Y/N” Spencer says, watching her move to sit next to him on the bench.
“Ohh, thanks for the iced tea!” She says, taking a sip of the cold drink. Even though it’s barely winter, Spencer still can’t believe that she can drink iced beverages in any kind of weather below 50 degrees. He nods and kisses her on her cheek, which causes a small giggle to emerge. Spencer is still kind of surprised that his affections can elicit such happy responses from her.
“So,” Y/N starts. “Why did you leave our house at 7:00 AM and text me to meet you here?”
“Umm,” Spencer says, the nerves bubbling to the surface. You can do this, Spencer, he thinks. You can do this, she’s not going to say no. She can’t say no. At this moment, Spencer is really wishing he had his passport with him and a getaway car to jump in, just in case Y/N says no.
“Did you know that only 3% of weddings happen in a courthouse?” Y/N asks at a completely stunned Spencer.
“Yeah,” Spencer says timidly, not entirely sure where this is panning out, but grateful to listen to his girlfriend. It beats the alternative, him saying something stupid and her laughing at him; him fleeing the state and ending up a magician in a Las Vegas casino.
“Yes, courthouse weddings are a great alternative, they’re affordable and efficient for couples who just want to get married without all that fuss,” Y/N adds, looking at Spencer.
She’s profiling you, Spencer thinks. Don’t make eye contact. He knows (and she knows) that the moment he looks into her eyes, he’s done for. Las Vegas here he comes….
“And 51% of marriages end in divorce,” Spencer tells her, before he can even think about what he’s saying. Great he thinks, the day that he’s supposed to propose to her, he’s talking about divorce statistics.
“You know that I failed statistics in college, Spence?” Y/N asks him.
“I think I remember you mentioning that,” Spencer says, now thoroughly confused as to where this is going.
“I have an evil plan to seek revenge against statistics, so I think that it’s my life mission to prove them wrong,” Y/N finishes, pulling something out from her bag.
Spencer can feel his heart beating in his chest. He’s even more terrified than he was before. Suddenly all those songs that Y/N made him dance to late in the middle of the night make complete sense.
“But, I also think that it’s my life mission to spend the rest of my life with you, Spence. So, I know that it’s not alway the case for the girl to propose marriage, but I think that you deserve someone to propose to you,” Y/N says, very quickly.
Spencer sits there on the bench with Y/N sitting right next to him, utterly speechless. Did she just….
“You want to marry me?” Spencer says, dumbly.
“Of course I do, Spencer! Give me your hand, I got you an engagement ring and-”
Spencer, suddenly fearless, cups her face in his hands, effectively making her quiet. He works on the surge of confidence, leaning in and kisses Y/N on the lips. It’s like he’s kissing her for the first time in his life. It’s like his first kiss ever, but it’s the first kiss of all the kisses of the rest of their life.
“So I’ll take that as a yes,” Y/N says, breaking apart from Spencer.
Spencer lets out a laugh, completely forgetting why on Earth he was so scared to propose.
“So you’re not the only one who had this idea, Y/N” Spencer tells her, reaching into his cardigan pocket. He hands her the velvet box and reveals the vintage ring that he picked out from the second hand jewelry store.
“Spencer? Is this why you told me to come here? Oh God, I ruined your proposal!” Y/N says, embarrassed that she messed with Spencer’s plans, knowing how nervous he can get.
“On the contrary Y/N, I’m sure that this is the best possible proposal,” Spencer tells her, as she lays her head against his shoulder.
“Spencer,” Y/N says, suddenly serious.
“Yes, fiance?” Spencer teases.
“How would you like to be in the 3% of marriages? Like as soon as possible. Like tomorrow? I don’t think I can wait another second not being married to you,” she confesses.
“As long as we’re in the 49%, I’ll do anything you want.”
#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x reader fluff#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid#dr spencer reid#spencer reid x you#spencer reid fic#criminal minds fic#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid deserved a happy ending#spencer reid fluff#criminal minds self insert#criminal minds#spencer reid x y/n fluff#spencer reid gets a happy ending#mgg
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Hii 👋 😁 okay so I'd like to request a valentines date with the brothers and newdatebales but while they are on the date MCs ex who is a complete jerk interrupts their nice time and MCs date makes the ex pay for being so rude. Happy Valentines Day! 💝
Happy valentine's! Ugh exes really can be a pain! I'd fist fight my ex for a stick of gum, no hesitation
Sorry this took so long, I've been asleep for most of the day
Pt.2 = undateables (minus Luke)
Context: you decided to go to the human world for your date
Lucifer:
Restaurant! Always - it's a classic
It was fairly lavish, Everyone was in suits or dresses, the place seemed to glitter from how polished it all was
A small classical band in the back
"I'm having a lovely time, I hope it's all to your liking."
"definitely is, though if you were the one playing the piano I'd make it even better."
"I'll keep that in mind for later."
He smirked, taking a sip of his wine whilst you just beamed
You two have been waiting month's for this renovation and you glad you were able to get it in on Valentines
"Oh! (Y/N) been ages- didn't expect you to be here, who's your friend?"
Your stomach dropped
Your ex just smiled at you two, leaning on your seat
"boyfriend."
"no! No way! You're dating?! I heard you were so broken after our breakup, so glad you were finally able to move on, must of been hard."
"Will you leave? I'm trying to enjoy myself-"
Lucifer glared at them, shifting in his seat incase he had to settle this - he had faith in your strength but knew he wouldn't stay silent for long
"Why so hostile?! I haven't done anything wrong it's not like I've gone and told him how clingy you were or the fact you just LOVED arguing."
"fuck off will you?! I wasn't clingy, you were just distant and barely treated me like a partner and we got into arguements because YOU kept going behind my back."
He finally stepped in, noticing you were getting EXTREMELY worked up and had tears lining your eyes
He pulled your ex around, gripping their face and flashed them his true forms face
They screamed as they shoved themselves away from him, darting away to their table
This made everyone look at them, Lucifer fixing his hair and wiped his gloves with a scented wipe
"how unpleasant, Let's get the check, we can finish this back at the house."
He called over a waiter, quickly paying and collecting the now packaged food
"Just tap me and I'll step in sooner, I know you can handle yourself but I didn't want to give them the satisfaction of seeing you cry."
Mammon:
A drive in movie - wants to show off his hot wheels and attractive partner~
He was pulled all sorts of cheesy moves, the yawn and stretch is one but many
He smiled having you leaned against him with his arm around your shoulder
You told him you were going to get more snacks and he tried to follow you but you said it'll be alright
Though when you came back you saw your ex leaning on mammons car, flirting with him
"Babe! I told them to back off but they kept pushing-"
"I didn't expect to see you here, are you with him?"
"I'm very much with him, he's taken."
You roughly handed mammon the snacks
He knew to keep his mouth shut, that look on your face wasn't something to mess with
"what a shame, I'm glad you finally got over me though, I heard from your friends you disappeared for 6 months."
"yeah, I was busy with living my life not crying over you."
Your exes mouth twitched whilst you just jumped back into your side of the car
"Right, right - so are you two serious or just a fling? I know it's difficult for you to keep a partner - why not keep me company? You're too handsome to be with them, don't you think? There's no way you actually like them-"
They trailed a hand up mammons arm, sending him a wink
He smacked their hand away from him, growing tired of their behaviour
"you listen here I'm in love with them more than your tiny little human brain will ever understand, back away from my car or watch us go on with our date."
When your ex didn't move he grabbed your shirt, pulling you in into a heated kiss
Whilst you two made out your cradled his head, flipping off your ex, mammon didn't have to even look to know what you were doing
He joined in on flipping them off, you both stayed like that until you heard them scoff and leave
"just say the word and I'll do whatever you ask, I won't let them get away with talking to you like that."
When the movie was done you spotted your exes car with the window down, mammon happily through your Popcorn into their window
But it wasn't over, when his car got close enough he took a pocket knife, slashing their car and immediately drove off at high speed
Levithan:
Arcade; was there really anything else?
He was determined to get you all the arcade prizes, using all his skills to make the machine do as he wished
Has used his tail to grab a prize from a rigged claw machine
"what else should we do? I saw a two player shooter finally open up."
"maybe dance dance Revolution? It'll be fun~"
He groaned, not wanting to do physical exercise but smiled when you weren't looking
He knew every dance song and pattern! He was going to impress you so much!
Of course there was a line, two kids hogging it and people recording them
Though things took a turn when your ex showed their face
"i should of known you'd come here, can't seem to stop visiting our old dating spots, huh?"
You rolled your eyes, clutching levithan's hand
If you were going to be honest, you completely forgot this was one of your old date places
You just remembered it was close by and you've been there when you were younger
"get over yourself, I'm on a date with my boyfriend."
"him? Really? I knew I hurt you but I didn't expect you to downgrade this much."
Levi looked down ashamed, anger boiling inside of him at how they spoke to you
He suddenly moved Infront of you, gripping your exes shirt as he pinned them to the photo-booth
"I don't care what you say to me but I know that you're just a cheating liar who gets off making others feel shitty, stay away from us or I will rip you to shreds limb by limb!"
He didn't even know his voice raised, punching the booth beside their head
Your normally timid boyfriend only got like this when you tried to be a better TSL fan than him or he lose his patience with mammon
Your ex cowered under his gaze, darting off as soon as they could
"i- I hope I didn't speak over you! I know you could of easily dealt with them but I just couldn't stand it!"
Satan:
Meausum, very interesting with different moments in history and discoveries all for the public to see - a date for nerds
Good thing you're both nerds (tbh I'd love a date like this)
"I was actually alive when this happened, It was pretty remarkable."
Oh yeah, expect him to be giving you all the classified details of moments in history
You just wished you had him whilst you were doing your history exams, you could of gotten so much extra credit!
"were you ever in any pictures? It would be pretty fun if we spotted you in the back of one of these."
He just laughed, grinning as you slowly began to realize that was an actual possibility
But before you could press on your mouth flew shut
Your ex was here
You elected to ignore them but they didn't have the same idea for you
"I never expected to see you around again, I thought you disappeared completely when no one heard from you in months."
"now that you're talking to me I wish I had, is there a reason you're interrupting my date?"
"your date? Is this him? I didn't think you'd move on so quickly~ shows what value you have on relationships."
Satan was pleased; he's heard all about your ex and was mad they were even breathing the same air as you
You were more annoying than any of his brother's and he hasn't even said anything to them yet
"I got over you quickly which might I add 10 months isn't a short time span - because you mean nothing me, you're a bitch."
"Back off or you'll end up with a bloody nose."
"gonna hit? Some man you are! Quick to violence-"
He grabbed their head, quickly jerking their head as if he was going to smash it into the display
His fingers dug into their scalp and tugged at their hair
"You have 5 seconds, I'm feeling nice today because it's valentine's - run now or I will put a dent in your skull."
He let go and he began to count, your ex looked at you both with fear before running
Just grazing the 5 second limit
"what was we discussing? Ah yes, I'll point out where I am, I think the picture is just up ahead."
Asmodeus:
Bath store date!!!
If it's with asmo - anything can be exciting
Even if it is you two walking around snorting bath bombs and poking the bath jello
Asmo handed you a bar
"smell it~ it's got herbs and flowers in it, doesn't the smell remind you of the kitchen back home?"
You gave it a small sniff but almost got abit of herb stuck in your nose when you saw your ex looking straight at you
He caught onto your surprise, slightly turning to see someone approach you two
"Careful there, don't want it to get stuck up your nose."
Your ex laughed, you just frowned
The demon looking between you, noticing how unhappy you were
"Do you want something? We're busy."
"I spotted you and thought to see hi! It's been so long since we've talked! Are you feeling abit better now after your break? I know the breakup was hard."
They gave you a pity filled look, patting your shoulder
"No, the breakup was easy to get through but why does it matter to you? We're not friends and you dumped me and that was that."
"come on it couldn't be just that, don't be shy Infront of- who are you exactly?"
Asmo quickly wrapped an arm around you, hugging you close as he gave your ex a tight smile
"Their boyfriend~! And I'm not happy about you talking to my sweetheart, leave."
"boyfriend? You look like that and you wanna try to be tough, you're as scary as a cloud- this is what you moved on with? I should of expected it."
"cute, look me in the eyes whilst you say that, won't you?"
Your ex foolishly did, Getting ready to insult but felt themself be fully charmed
"Won't you be a dear and spin around for me? Perhaps start clucking like a chicken, I think there's some feed over there." He cooed.
You bursted out laughing watching your ex do exactly as they were asked
Your boyfriend just smiled, picking up another soap and sniffing it before handing it to you
"ooo it's really fragrance, let's get this one."
You ignored your charmed ex, leaving the store with your stuff, hearing them yell out in humiliation as soon as you stepped out the store
Beezlebub:
Picnic, Should of been expected
You watched him do his stretches; you knew he had to keep himself occupied with draining tasks to keep better control over his constant hunger
He already scarfed down most of what was in basket before his fitness watch went off
You just sat back and observed
"I know this isn't romantic but once I'm tired we can continue, I'm sorry."
"Beel, I'd rather watch you flex your muscles than feel starved."
"I'll do my best."
He leaned down and you met him half way, Sharing a quick kiss before he went jogging
Everytime he passed your spot you gave him a cheer
But what you didn't expect was your ex to whistle, watching Beel with you
"do you mind? That's my boyfriend."
"I can see, how'd you get a guy like him? He's shredded, I didn't think big guys were your type."
"It's none of your business what my type is, our relationship is over and I told you I never wanted to see you again."
Your ex scoffed, glaring down at you
"is that why you disappeared for months? You really think I'd be desperate enough to message you again?"
"is it it of your system yet? Can you leave?"
"What's the issue..? You don't look pleased."
He was looking directly at you, concern on his face
You sighed In annoyance
"oh~ and he has a nice voice aswell, aren't you a package, wanna go somewhere more private?"
It was your turn to scoff, beel frowned at your ex
He knew how unpleasant your ex was and immediately stepped towards them
He grabbed their head and easily lifted them off the ground and put them to his eye level
"Apologize and Leave."
Your ex whimpered, wincing in pain, beel moved them like a ragdoll and made them face you
"I'M SORRY FOR EVERYTHING!"
They were let go and scampered off
You turned to beel, cupping his face, his mood immediately improving
"you did amazing, baby, are you tired or do you need to keep exercising?"
"I think I'll be able to be fine now, I'm glad they left so quickly, I was going to eat them."
Belphegor:
He wanted sky diving but you decided to go to the mattress store
Odd date choice but it made perfect sense to your boyfriend, they were having double bed special offers
He sunk into the mattress, sighing feeling how soft and bouncy it was
"We Should get this one."
"you said that with the last mattress, I'm sure you could find one hard as a rock and still want it."
"the top of the sofa is a comfy spot but I like my mattresses soft."
You just hummed, looking at the prices
"Tore up the old one with one of your tantrums? What a shame."
"excuse me??! I had a death In my family and that was an accident-! Why are you even here?!"
You can't believe it! Your ex had to be here of all places!
"I did want to say hi but now you're just getting all worked up over abit of teasing, you're still so sensative."
"Wow, forever the gaslighting cunt, I'm really not surprised you haven't changed but you got real balls to be so public about how much of a shitty person you are."
Beel was propped up on the mattress, happily watching you verbally destroy your ex
"you're just a bitch as always-"
"hold on, I'm just teasing - no need to get all angry about it."
He snickered whilst you smirked, coping the same tone your ex used
"Ah~ I know you, they told me about you, you're the ex that slipped and fell into the pool full of sick, I've been laughing about that for months."
"you-! I can't believe you'd talk about me so much, have you really moved on?"
"they told him one story, calm down, is this what you do now that you're single? terrorise couples in mattress store?"
They tried to bark back but he cut them off
"You know...I know plenty of ways to suffocate a human and I wouldn't even have to put a single finger on you, unless you want to see what I can do to your mind, I'd turn around and bother someone else."
They stared at him in horror, seeing you both just look down at them, enjoying their struggle for words
"you're both little shits, I hope you're miserable."
"and I hope you get the hell out of my face before I decide to stop being nice."
His eyes glowed as mist formed at his fingers, unnoticeable to anyone else around you
Your ex winced, a choked noise escaping them
They surprised you by being smart for once, turning around and storming away
"Are you miserable, belphie?"
"only when you're not around."
#obey me#obey me shall we date#obey me mammon#gamingclubpresident#aracadejohn217 9#obey me mc#obey me asmodeus#obey me satan#obey me beezlebub#obey me levithan#obey me luficer#obey me belphegor#obey me discourse#obey me x you#obey me x mc#obey me x reader#obey me imagine#valentine's day
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Princess of Asgard
Pairing: Bucky x reader
Warnings: dead parents, forced marriage, smut, breeding kink, kinda AU, pregnancy
Words: 3968
“None of you will be able to lift my hammer.” Thor said, smugly.
“Oh, we will see.” Tony challenged him.
One by one the gathered Avengers tried to lift Mjolnir but of course to no avail.
“Come on Y/N. Now you have to try too.” they tried to convince you.
“No, thanks. Why should I be able to if you can’t? I’d rather not get disappointed.” you sipped on your drink.
“Oh, boohoo. What a party pooper.” Nat yelled at you.
“Okay fine.” you got up from your seat on the couch, swaying a little as you went. Taking off your sweater you gripped the handle with both hands and pulled. You didn’t expect it to move but somehow it did.
Astonished, you stood in front of your friends wielding Thor’s hammer. Everyone’s jaws dropped to the ground.
“That is impossible.” Thor mumbled.
Creeped out by all of this and hoping, if you put it down nothing had ever happened, you let the weapon fall back onto the glass table, which made the fragile material burst.
“Oh, shit! I’m sorry.” you jumped backwards in surprised shock.
And then the questions came rushing out of everyone.
“How is that possible?” “Why you?” “Is it heavy?” “Do you feel different?” yadda yadda yadda.
Completely overwhelmed by all of that you just turned around and ran to your room. Hoping they would leave you alone and drop the topic.
“You fell forward onto your bed and buried your face in the cushions. You needed time to think. The questions the others had asked you were on your mind as well and you tried your best to answer them but that seemed pointless.
Sometime later you heard a knock on your door but you didn’t want to see anyone so you stayed silent, hoping they would go away.
“Y/N. I know you are in there. Please open. I need to have a talk with you.” So it was Thor. You still didn’t wanna see him.
“Friday, please open Y/N door. That would be very kind of you.” you heard your door lock click and rolled your eyes. Well, when he decided to be so rude you decided not to turn around.
You wriggled further into your sheets and didn’t notice your shirt had ridden up on your back. When Thor stepped closer he did notice.
“Y/N, what is this?” he asked but you couldn’t see because he was behind you so you turned to face him. “What is what?” you asked back, confused.
“The birthmark on your back.”
“Oh, that. Well, it’s a birthmark. Nothing more nothing less. Why are you behaving so strangely?” Now he scared you a bit.
“What is it Thor? Tell me.” you demanded.
Instead of talking he started to take off his dress shirt.
“Ehm, Thor what are you doing?” you wanted to know hesitantly.
When it was off you shortly admired his devine physique before he turned his back to you and you gasped. On his back right in the middle over his butt was the same birthmark you had located.
“How is that possible?” you gasped.
“I don’t know but I have a feeling who does. You have to come with me to Asgard. You need to meet my mother.” he stated.
“Ehm, okay. Can I put on some other clothes before though?”
“Of course. I will wait outside.”
You put on some jeans and a sweater because you didn’t know what weather to expect. You laced your shoes and grabbed your purse before heading out onto the hallway.
Waiting there for you were Thor and Loki, to your surprise.
“Eh, hi. Are you coming with us?”
“Of course. I want to know what this is all about.” Loki answered.
You had never used the bifrost before so you were excited and scared at once.
Thor raised Mjolnir and the bifrost opened, swallowing you all, while you clung to the blonde's side.
You arrived by falling out of some kind of portal. Heimdall was already waiting.
“The King and Queen are awaiting your presence in the throne room.” he said monotonously in that booming voice of his.
“Hold on tight.” Thor ordered you and you did just that before he flew you both to the castle. Leaving Loki behind to get there by foot.
“Mother! Father!” Thor greeted his parents when walking into the impressive throne room. You cowered behind him.
“I need you to meet someone and maybe you can shine light on the situation.” he continued.
“Son, it is good to have you back in Asgard. You have spent way too much time on Midgard recently. I missed you dearly. And where is your brother Loki?” Frigga asked.
“I’m here, mother. I cannot fly as you probably remember.” he remarked from the doorway.
“There you are. Very good. So what is this all about?”
“Well, this is Y/N. She is a friend from Midgard.” he explained then he turned to you. “Y/N, would you show our mother your birthmark?”
“Yes, okay.” you turned around and pulled your sweater up. A gasp went through the big hall and then silence followed. It was deafening.
You felt very exposed so you pulled the shirt back down and turned around again to face the King and Queen of Asgard.
No one was speaking. Everyone seemed lost in thought. But you couldn’t take it anymore.
“Okay, can someone please tell me what the bloody hell is going on here?” you screamed, regretting it almost instantly because you remembered who you were standing in front of.
“I’m sorry, just this silence is killing me. Why does Thor have the same mark as me? What does all of this mean?” you apologized.
Frigga got up from her throne and cae down to you. “Oh, my child. I will explain everything to you. Let’s take a walk through the gardens shall we?” how could you have said no to that proposal?
Outside she took your arm and hooked it into hers. You felt instantly comfortable with her.
“So this is a long story but you deserve to hear it.” she began. “Thor is not an only child. You know that Loki was adopted?” you nodded. “Good. Well Thor was actually a twin. And you are his sister.” That was a shock. Like how the hell..? You gawked at her.
“his sister was taken from Asgard when she was only 3 weeks old. We searched for her. Odin set heaven and earth in motion but we couldn't find her.. well you. But we never forgot you.'' She pulled an amulet out of her dress and opened it. Inside was a painting of a little baby. “That’s me?” you asked.
“Yes. I have never taken it off. Not in over 1000 years.” she had tears in her eyes.
“Wait, but how come I have been alive for that long but cannot remember it? I was adopted when I was approximately 6 weeks old and lived with that family until they died in a car crash 6 years ago.” you explained.
“You memories must have been altered by someone very powerful. Unfortunately I have no idea who could have done that and we will probably never know.” for her the situation was finished so you let it rest for now.
“So to sum this up: I am the long lost princess of Asgard? Thor’s twin sister? I have actually lived for over 1000 years? That’s what you want to tell me?”
“That is exactly true. But we will have time to answer all your questions later. Let’s get back inside and plan a feast in your honor.” she suggested, cheerfully.
“A feast? Like a party?” your eyes lit up. “Can I invite my friends from earth? I’m sure they would love to see Asgard.”
“Of course my dear. Anything for you.”
3 days later the festivities were planned, everything was decorated, guests were slowly arriving and the food was smelling delicious.
You were absolutely ready to meet everyone. Clad in finest Asgardian clothes and makeup done to perfection.
“You look marvelous my dear sister.” Thor complimented when you walked down the hallway.
“Thank you, brother. Man, it’s still crazy to say that out loud.” you smiled and took the arm he offered. You two entered the great hall together. All eyes were on you. The long lost princess of Asgard. Everyone wanted to take a look at you.
“They are all staring at me.” you whispered to Thor. “Of course they are. It’s pure admiration. They will love you no matter what.” he whispered back.
You breathed in deeply and smiled in the crowd.
Still nervous as hell you suddenly spotted Steve and Bucky at the bar.
“I’ll be back.” you murmured to Thor over the noise of the music and loosened your arm from his.
“Hey, guys. Thank you for coming. You look very nice.” you smiled at them.
“Thank you for inviting us, doll. It is overwhelming to finally see Asgard first hand. And you look amazing.” Bucky complimented you and kissed you on the cheek.
“I can only agree with Buck. The dress suits you very well. Would you like to dance?” Steve added.
“I would love to dance.” you took the invitation.
He led you to the dance floor, put his left hand on your hip and his right in your left. Your right hand found his shoulder. The music started anew and he began twirling you around. If you admired something, especially in Steve Rogers, was it his talent on the dance floor. You felt like you were floating. He had observed the Asgardians for a while and was now confident enough to follow the steps of their dances.
“You know Bucky likes you? Like really likes you?” he came directly to the point.
“Ehm, I don’t know. Does he? I mean he’s been flirty with me, sure. But other than that.. he never asked me out or anything.” you responded.
“Would you want to go out with him?”
“Yes. Of course. He’s great and I could really imagine something with him. But why are you talking with me about this?”
“Well, I think he is too scared of rejection to ask you out so you might have to ask him,” he clarified.
“Okay. Thanks for telling me, Steve. You’re a really good friend.” you smiled at him and kissed him on the cheek. When the song ended you bowed in front of Steve just like you had seen the other women do.
You decided to immediately go through with your plan and strolled over to Bucky.
But before you could reach him Frigga called for you.
“Sweetheart? Could you come over here for a second? I would like to introduce you to someone.” You sighed and walked over to her.
“Ah there you are my dear. Y/N this is my sister.”
“It’s an honor to meet you.” you responded as politely as you could.
“The pleasure is mine.” she bowed “I’m very sure you would like to be somewhere else right now.” she winked at you and you smiled shyly.
“Let the girl mingle Frigga. She is so new to all of this.” She talked to her sister.
“Oh sure. Off you go my dear Y/N. I will see you later.”
“Thank you, mother.” you nodded in thanks and turned back to go to Bucky.
Just when you were about to reach him Odin called everyone's attention.
“Good evening, everyone. We have gathered here tonight to officially welcome my daughter into her rightful home. Y/N come up here.” he demanded and of course you complied.
“She has finally come home so raise your glasses to the rightful princess of Asgard.”
Everyone toasted to you which made you blush profusely. You hated the attention. So many eyes on you. Hoping it would be quickly over you raised a glass which a nearby waiter had handed you.
The crowd seemed to expect a speech from you so you reluctantly opened your mouth to speak.
“Yes. Thank you father and I thank all of you for coming. The last few days have overwhelmed me greatly. A week ago I was an orphan on earth and now I am an Asgardian princess. I am so grateful for everyone who has supported me through every up and down in my life. And now I hope that you all have a wonderful night. Eat, drink and dance. Have fun. Cheers!” you raised your glass again and the people did the same. Then, fortunately for you, the attention shifted back to what they had been doing before.
You left the stage and pushed through the crowd in the direction you had last seen the brunette super soldier.
But he was not where you expected him to be.
“Na, have you seen Bucky?” you asked the redhead.
“I think he went outside for a walk, said it was getting too crowded in here.” she answered and kept dancing with whomever she could find.
The thanks you ushered her went unnoticed and you hushed past her.
The garden behind the palace was huge and like a labyrinth. You hiked up your dress and ran through the flower beets and bushes until you spotted him, sitting on the bench which had also become your favorite.
“There you are hiding.” startled he almost fell off the bench.
“Oh my,” he grabbed his heart to mock a heart attack.
“I thought you had super soldier hearing.” you mocked him.
“Well, yes. But not when I am in thought.”
“What were you so lost in that you didn’t hear me from a mile away?”
“Ehm, I was thinking about you, actually.” he blushed. You had never seen Bucky Barnes blush before.
“Really. Only good things I hope.” you winked at him. “Can I sit?”
he motioned for you to take your place next to him.
“Bucky? I have thought a lot about you recently, too. Do you wanna go on a date with me when we are back on earth?” it just bubbled out of you.
“You are coming back to earth? I thought you were gonna stay here? This being your new home and all.” he looked down to his feet.
“Oh hell no. I mean it’s nice here and all and I would love to visit once in a while but earth and New York is my home. I will never feel fully settled here in Asgard. Plus you are in New York and that is all the home I need.” you leaned over and snuggled into his side. He put his left arm around you and you had never felt so safe before.
“Then back to your question: of course I am taking you on a date back on earth or any other planet you wanna go from here. I will follow you to the ends of the universe.” you felt extremely loved in that moment.
So you leaned up and kissed him on his full lips.
6 months later and you had found a rhythm together as the perfect couple. You were still as much in love as you had been the day back on Asgard.
But that was about to change.
“Y/N. Mother wishes to talk to you. Now.” Thor emphasized.
“Now? I am busy. If she wants something from me she can come down here.” you talked back.
“Oh, trust me sister, you don’t want that. You better do as she wants or there will be consequences.” he looked actually scared.
“Fine! Let's go!” you groaned.
“Mother. What is so important that you needed to see me so urgently?” you asked while strolling into the throne room.
“My dear Y/N. Come closer and sit.” she ordered.
You sat on a chair in front of her and she immediately got to the point.
“Your father and I have found a suitable husband for you. This union will bless Asgard with a strong ally.” She looked pleased with herself.
“Excuse me? What? A husband? I am old enough to find one for myself and I am sure I already have.” you retorted.
“There is no discussion princess. This is not a question of whether you want this or not. It is already settled. Your father is in Vanaheim right now securing the deal. Next summer you will marry the eldest prince.”
“UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES AM I MARRYING SOMEONE I DON’T KNOW OR DON’T CARE ABOUT!!!!! FORGET IT!!! BASTA! I’m leaving now before I do something I will regret.” you yelled at her and stormed off. Through the bifrost and back home.
When you stormed through your and Bucky’s shared apartment doors he knew that something was up.
“Y/N, doll, what’s wrong?” he asked and put a hand reassuringly on your shoulder.
“They want to marry me off to some prince!! Like I am some piece of meat!! Who do they think they are??” you were still so angry.
“They what?? They can’t do that. Did you tell him you had a boyfriend on earth?”
“Duh, of course I did. They don’t care! I feel like I am living in the middle ages right now!”
“This is fucked up! And if we get married right now?”
“Was that a proposal, Sergeant Barnes?”
“Ehm, maybe? Depends on your answer.”
“Of course I would marry you right on the spot but I think that an earth marriage doesn’t count in Asgard.” you said disappointed.
After some minutes in silence he broke it by asking “Then I only see one way out of this. What is a thing that a man can rarely accept when marrying a woman?”
“I don’t know. Do enlighten me.”
“Well, when she is pregnant by someone else.”
Your jaw dropped to the ground. But then you thought it over and you had wanted a family with Bucky anyways so why not now?
“That sounds actually reasonable. You wanna start trying right now?” you winked at him seductively and started opening the buttons on his shirt.
“Who am I to say no to that?” he lunged over and kissed you desperately.
It didn’t take long for you to be rolling naked on the bed. Never breaking the kiss he groped for your breasts because he knew how much that got you running. One hand warm, one cold. The contrast was exhilarating when they wandered down your naked body, over your hips and to your pussy. Spreading your lower lips. “Fuck I know how you I get you wet, don’t I?” he asked rhetorically. You just moaned and spread your legs wider for him.
“Good girl. I would love to eat you out until you can’t take it anymore.” you shuddered at his confession because you knew how good he was with his tongue. “But we have a goal here and I want to keep you as full as possible for as long as possible. You want that, baby? Me keeping you full of cum for days?” his dirty talk turned you on to no end.
“Hmm, fuck yes.” he took that as a go and plunged his dick inside your tight channel.
His movements were slow but precise. He knew how to hit your special spots and make you see stars.
Higher and higher you flew, throwing your head back in pleasure and moaning his name. “Fuck Bucky, harder!” you begged him and he complied. His hip bones left marks on yours and the bed creaked dangerously.
A few thrusts later and you were coming hard, spasming around his throbbing length. “Fuck baby squeezing me so tight. Gonna come!” he groaned, pushed really deep and let go. You shuddered when you felt his release coat your walls for the first time. You had only done it with a condom before so this was new but not bad at all.
“Shit. I thought our sex had been good before but now… wow amazing. I won’t let you out of this bed until you are pregnant. That is for sure.” he laughed.
Well 2 months later and you had succeeded. You were pregnant. No one knew yet but you were about to tell Thor so he could tell your parents.
“Thor, wait up. Could you bring Mother and Father a message from me?”
“Why don’t you come with me and tell them yourself?” he asked.
“Because I don’t know what travelling through the bifrost will do to my baby.” you let out.
“Your baby?” his eyes went wide. “You are pregnant?” he smiled. “I’m gonna be an uncle?” he hugged you tightly and then he realized what that meant. “Oh, Mother and Father won’t be pleased to hear that. You won’t be able to marry the prince now.”
“That was the intention behind it.” you smirked.
“Oh, makes sense. I understand. And although I really don’t want to be the one to bring the news I will because I love you, sister. I’ll be on my way then.”
“Thank you Thor. I love you too.” You stepped back and he summoned the bifrost.
For 4 days you didn’t hear anything from them. Nor did you see Thor. You were seriously scared that they had murdered the messenger.
Then something incredible happened. Your Mother suddenly stood in front of you.
“Hello, my dear.” She greeted you.
“Hello, Mother. You have come down to earth.
“Of course. I want to meet that man of yours. If he is important enough for you to neglect your duties as princess of Asgard, he must be otherworldly.”
“Ehm, okay. Sure. He is the love of my life and I wouldn’t exchange him for the world. Follow me. I will try to find him.” you walked into the compound.
“Friday. Where is Bucky right now?” you asked the AI.
“He is in the garden by the trees.” she informed you.
“Thank you, Friday.”
“What was that? Is that magic?” Frigga asked.
You laughed “No, not magic. Just technology.” You walked out into the garden and toward the treeline.
“Bucky? My mother is here to meet you.” you yelled. It sounded like happy information but it was more of a warning. If he wasn’t ready he could vanish or hide.
But he came around a tree. “Hello love. Oh, your majesty. Nice to meet you.” he bowed down.
“Oh no need for that formality. I am just here to see who stole my daughter's heart. And I can already see why you hold hers.``Then she turned to you “He’s a handsome one, isn’t he? I like him. He suits you.”
She addressed both of you again: “I honestly hope you two will be happy together for the rest of your lifes. Your father and I have talked and we give you our blessing. It was rude of us to assume that we were allowed to intervene in the life of a daughter we have not raised in our beliefs and spirit. We love you too much to lose you again so soon after a stupid argument. We will find a way to come to terms with Vanaheim differently.” she opened her arms and you hugged her closely.
“Thank you mother. You don’t know how much that means to me… to us.” you almost cried in relief.
“But we do have one condition.” your stomach dropped in fear.
“When the little prince or princess is born you come and visit us regularly.”
A weight was lifted off your shoulders and you agreed to her terms.
You were so relieved that everything went this way and you didn’t have to force your way out of this. In the end everything went the way you had hoped it would.
#mcu fic#mcu#bucky x reader#smut#angst#fluff#buckybarnes#multi fandom#au#pregnancy#almostforcedmarriage#marvel#fanfic#buckyxreader#Thor#odin#frigga#loki#asgard#princessofasgard
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