* Besides his “seems weird and suspicious but is literally just like that” and “he’s just like me” factor I swear this was also another reason I loved Otto so much. She has the cool grandma swag

OMG- BO FIC REQUEST

a fluffy fic where he takes you out to a fancy dinner. picks you up at your house & meets your parents, driving to the place, all that pizazz- and more if you decide to write! Im a big fucking sucker for the romantics as you can see LMFAO.

Meet The Parents - Bo Burnham x Reader

Warnings: Language

Theme: Fluff! Slight bit of Angst.

Word Count: 2.6k

A/N: picture this as like his what tour cause it fits up with the college timeline hoes. also, I hope you like that I added an airport, cause rom-com shit amirite? I’ll stop. wooooooo this is so long. I hope y’all like essays cause fuck.

It had been too long since you had last seen your boyfriend, Bo. The two of you had met in college at NYU briefly before he dropped out to pursue his comedy career.

Of course, you have been supportive. Why wouldn’t you be? You just really missed him, especially when he went on long tours, you in school, and him touring the world.

The two of you kept in touch. Bo often taking the time to call you before or after a show to hear your voice and call himself down. You knew what they did to his anxiety, and not being able to hold each other was difficult for the both of you.

He’d do the same for you, without a shadow of a doubt. Especially when school was stressing you out, and exams and essays were becoming a pain in the ass to handle. Even if it was just little funny texts or messages, he helped you.

It’s what you did for each other. You were a team, even if it was states away from each other. Except, luckily for you, his tour was ending soon. Or it should be, judging by the tiny calendar of dates that he gave you.

It was nearing Thanksgiving Break, and it just didn’t seem applicable that you’d be able to meet up in time. Given the short week window and Bo riding down from nearly a year of touring.

So you didn’t say much, as you packed your bags for the week and left for your home state.

The airplane ride wasn’t that bad. You wished that you had Bo beside you, cracking jokes to calm the inevitable way that your heart would jolt when you went up in the air. Unlike Bo, you absolutely hated flying.

Earbuds in, you strolled into the airport a tad bit jet-lagged and went to grab a bite from a small coffee shop. Slipping the cashier a twenty, you walked the airport in search of your luggage.

Through a sea of people, you trudged, already feeling fatigued and just wanting a nap. You didn’t even realize that you were gonna run smack dab into someone. That is until their hand shot up and held you steady.

You laughed pathetically and cringed quickly, going to apologize, hoping that the person who caught you would just keep moving on. Except, they still stood in front of you, silent as ever.

“Hey man look I’m so sorry, I’m just so tired I didn’t even see where I was going.” you mumbled before realizing just who you were speaking to.

Bo.

You froze, staring at the man in pure confusion. How was he here when he was supposed to still be on tour? You rubbed your eyes, wondering if he’d still be there when you reopened them.

News flash, Bo was still there. Fuck.

“Holy shit,” you murmured, realizing your hands were still full with your bag, phone, and lunch.

God, you were gonna cry; this wasn’t happening. He looked so fucking good, the glasses, the hair.

He watched you quietly, a soft smile resting upon his lips. While you clumsily pull on his arm to get out of the ongoing traffic of people around you, preferably a spot with a place to put your stuff.

Your tall boyfriend lumbering after you unbeknownst to you, trying to compose himself. It had practically been months since he had seen you last, and you had never looked more beautiful.

Once you set them down gently, you practically ran into the man’s arms. His bags gently fall to the floor as his arms are securely wrapped around you. Nearly lifting you off the ground.

The two of you rocked gently in the embrace, completely lost in each other. Bo resting his head on top of yours, pressing soft kisses upon your head. Tears softly pour down your cheeks and onto his shirt. Giving him enough time to wipe them away and plant a soft kiss against your lips.

“Bo, what are you doing here? I thought you were still on tour.” you sniffled, still wrapped up in his arms.

“Managed to make things work, I wanted to see you. Or I was gonna try and surprise you at the gate, but you kinda…ran into me.” Bo smirked, looking down at you.

“Well you definitely surprised me, man I really missed you.” you said quietly.

“Honey, you don’t understand how long I’ve waited for this moment. I swear my agents are probably sick and tired of me talking about you.” he exclaimed, causing you to smile.

This long-distance was really starting to get to the two of you; of course, his tour was gonna be over soon. Except, especially two different states away from each other, it made your heart hurt.

Moments like these, you wanted to just pause the time and exist in them forever. It seemed like between the two of you, you were running out of time. Just how much time exactly?

It was almost as if he could sense the hesitation as he swept up his bags and yours in the process.

“Just realized, we’ve got places to be.” he chirped, and you eyed him curiously.

“Like where?” you said, grabbing your coffee and bag from the coffee shop.

“Patience is a virtue my dear.” he tuts and slips his hand between yours. “Now, where’s your luggage terminal?”

-

It was roughly a forty-minute drive from the airport to your place. Bo had rented a car for the next couple of days, so it was smooth sailing from that point on.

Bo behind the wheel, and you are sitting in the passenger trying to figure out what music to play.

It didn’t help that you were in the car with a comedian, as whatever song you picked, Bo would pretend to critique it. Only sending you into a fit of hysterics.

“Oh okay, well you pick the music then!” you cried, pretending to stare daggers at him.

“I’ve got something for you, it’s this brand new artist I found while on tour.” he grinned, looking over at you briefly before focusing back on the road.

“His name is….Bo Burnham I think? I could be wrong? He was good-“ he said nonchalantly before earning a quick swipe to his arm from you.

“God, you look cute when you’re angry. You’re missing out on that Bo Burnham guy, he’s got potential.” he said.

“I hate you.” you giggle before finding a more comfortable position in the car.

“Oh shit you know what I just realized?” Bo yelped, causing you to slightly jolt in your seat.

“What?”

“Isn’t this the first time I’m meeting your parents?” he asked, causing you to slightly stiffen in your seat.

Technically, yes. It wasn’t like your parents didn’t know, it’s more so that there was never really a good time for them to meet. You wondered what they’d think, dating someone who dropped out of college to pursue comedy.

Not that your parents were judgmental. They wanted you to be happy, as any parents would. You just were worried if they wouldn’t respect and love Bo as much as you did. It had been close to two years at this point; what else did you have to lose?

“You are right, oh dear god. I wonder how that’s gonna go, hopefully well, right?” you ask, more so to yourself than Bo.

“Oh please, I’m great with people’s parents. Plus, they raised you, I’m sure they are great people. Babe, you’ve got nothing to worry about.” he reassured before continuing on the route.

-

It wasn’t long before he pulled into your family driveway, pulling the car into park, quickly placing a comforting hand on your shoulder.

“You ready?” he says quietly, looking at you sweetly.

You eyed the front door before looking back and meeting his eyes, nodding, as he leaned in to give you a quick kiss.

God, you missed those.

“Here goes nothing.” you smirk before slipping out of the passenger side and gather your bags.

Bo now follows suit as you knock on the door, his taller frame towering over you. One hand pressed on the small of your back, holding you steady.

The front door opens with a swing, with your mother greeting you at the door. A firm grin upon her lips as she rushes out to hug you, your father appearing behind her.

“Oh I’m so glad you were able to come home! We missed you so much!” she exclaims, squeezing you tighter.

Before giving you a slight nudge and knowing look towards Bo, who had remained oblivious, while he shook hands with your father.

All of you gather inside your house, Bo taking control of the conversation when acceptable.

Sitting down at the kitchen table, your parents are engulfed in his stories and laughing at his jokes. All the while getting to know the man that you loved so much.

Bo was pretty much a natural when it came to impressing others, and you knew it wasn’t gonna be an issue with your parents.

The two of you answering almost any questions, Bo excitingly telling the story of how the two of you met.

-

“Oh I almost forgot, I need you to do me a favor.” Bo murmured when the two of you had a moment to be alone.

You looked up at him in confusion before he mentioned something about dressing up nice. A knowing look upon his lips before giving you a slight wink and walking off towards the guest room.

There you stood, gaping like a fish in wonderment at what he possibly could be planning. Slowly walking into your childhood bedroom, looking for anything that would meet his description of nice.

You settled for something that you wore to a formal gathering that still managed to fit you. Giving yourself a quick look in the mirror, you left your bedroom to find Bo standing there.

You had to hold back a gasp; the man looked rather handsome in a dress shirt and pants. His hair was nicely done, and his hand gestured out for you to take.

“Bo what is all this for?” you exclaim, as he only smirks and leads you towards the front door.

“Shut up, I’ve been wanting to take you out for months.” he says as he opens it and leads you towards his car.

The man practically doing the whole nine yards, all the while you looking at him in pure wonderment. Of course, the two of you had been on dates prior, but never like this.

You had to practically stop yourself from grinning as he suavely got into the driver’s side of the car., Giving a quick glance over at you unbeknownst to you, trying not to melt at how gorgeous you looked.

“Where are we going?” you ask as he starts the car slowly pulling out of the driveway.

“You ask a lot of questions my dear.” he says, keeping his eyes focused on the road.

“Oh shit is this my execution?” you smirk as he dramatically nods.

“Babe, how the hell did you find out? Who told you? Was it my manager? I knew she’d rat me out!” he exclaims.

“You know I had to be certain, you did make me dress up all nice and all.” you play along, grinning ear to ear.

“Oh well, I can’t give away the entire surprise so zip it with the questions sweetie.” he quips as he continues the drive.

-

It’s not long before he pulls into a fancy Italian restaurant, way out of your usual pay range. You could feel your stomach do somersaults, giving the man an incredulous look.

Bo simply grins as he gets out of the car, rushing over to open yours for you. Eyes wide, still staring at him like he was fucking insane. He shakes his head and carefully pulls you out of the car.

“Now no complaints. Or whatever you plan to do. I’m paying, I’ve been wanting to treat you like this for over a year now. I’m doing it, and I’m gonna enjoy doing it.” Bo huffs, all dignified.

You simply nod in disbelief before he slips his hand within yours. While he enters the restaurant, he mentions his reservations to the hostess, and they seat you at a table.

Once the butterflies subsided in your stomach, you took the attention of the man in front of you. Never had anyone done something like this for you. You were trying to not look like a genuine fool with the smile you wanted to express.

You knew he was the one for you, but the way that he had looked at you. The pure adoration in his eyes and how he had planned everything, you were practically melting.

“I love you.” you whisper, wondering if he could hear it.

He did.

Bo looked up from his menu, a blush now practically kissing his cheeks. He dimples, rising at the declaration before reaching across the table since he was large enough to kiss you gently.

He was quick enough as the waitress came over to take your order. That goofy lovesick grin still plastered across his face as he straightened up in his seat.

The two of you ordering whatever looked best on the menu, clinking glasses when they arrived and looking dreamily into each other’s eyes.

“Man, I missed you. Like I know I say it a lot, but I mean I did. Going on tour is….well it’s lonely. I know you’re still in school, but sweetie. When I’m done, you’ll be sick of me. I promise.” Bo said insistently.

“No I won’t, I’m sure it’s gonna be the other way around. I don’t know if I say it enough, but I really am proud of you. I am so proud to call you my boyfriend, to call you mine. I don’t mind waiting.” you say quietly.

“How did I get so lucky?” he paused, eyeing the plates of food that were coming your way.

“Thank NYU, they did all the work.” you joke, thanking the waitress before digging into the meals.

The food was excellent; it was incredibly worth the price. Even if it was steep, the dinner was lovely. Bo is cracking jokes and telling you his favorite fan encounters that have occurred since his tour began.

It was hard to believe that the man who was often so quiet and shy could be so loud and brave enough to yell at hecklers. Except you could believe it, you had obviously been to one of his shows.

It made your heart begin to flutter at the fact that he wasn’t afraid to be himself around you; it made you feel secure.

The way his stage presence dominated the scene, it was practically impossible to keep your eyes off of him. No matter the situation.

Even now, his eyes glimmer while he tells you whatever story he had dug up. This was his passion, and you reveled in it all.

The night went well as the two of you caught up, knowing it would be quite some time before he’d meet up with you again. As he too had Thanksgiving to celebrate with his family in Massachusetts.

You shared a nice dessert, and he left a rather hefty tip simply because he could. Bo never made it necessary to note that he had money, but you knew he was excited to spend it.

All the while, you spent the night in a dizzying smile. Not giving a shit whether anyone knew it or not, even in the parking lot. The two of you waltzing messily towards the car, giggling and sputtering like a bunch of fools.

He was your fool, and you were his, who knew how long you’d have with him for now. You were destined to make the most of it.

Even as the ride home dwindled and you knew he’d have to catch a flight soon. You weren’t surprised or shocked even; days with him tended to be like this.

As the two of you reached your front door, Bo carefully leaned down to a comfortable position and kissed you softly. Not desperately, just tenderly. As if by the time he’d kiss you again, you’d simply wouldn’t be there.

His lips grazing yours, hands pressed carefully against your cheeks. You reciprocating all the while leaning into him in a warm embrace.

When you finally pulled away to catch your breath, he gave you a look that you knew all too well.

“I’m not saying goodbye.” you whisper into his arms.

“I’ll be back soon don’t worry.” he murmurs into your embrace.

With one last kiss on the forehead, you watch as he walks back to his car. Judging by the way his schedule worked, you knew he’d be back sooner than he would in the past.

Yet, with the soft ‘I love you’ said between the two of you couldn’t help but shed a tear and just hope that the next time would last longer.

Thoughts on a Rebootverse Quack Pack

((I’ve pondered to myself on and off from time to time what a loose remake of Quack Pack set in the universe of DuckTales 2017 would be like. I don’t mean a 90s-style sit-com reality conjured by magic, but like the lives of the DT17 cast when the kids are teens, and hijinks ensuing vaguely similar to in the old 90s show, but with the setting of the reboot and personalities that are written to be the same characters from the reboot but a few years older.

This got long, so under the read-more it goes!

Like, of course, Duckburg wouldn’t be inexplicably populated by humans with only the main Duck family and a select few others being the only animals. If any human characters appear in the reboot version, they’d be anthropomorphized. Maybe Donald has a house now and is married to Daisy at this point, who has a moderately successful fashion line.

Huey, Dewey, and Louie are...I’d say, 16 around this time, and they live with Uncle Donald and Aunt Daisy in the house they got, as does Della. Donald could either be still trying to find a job that sticks or has found one by now, and Della’s probably a freelance pilot when she’s not specifically flying for Scrooge. The boys, no longer living at the mansion, would’ve been enrolled back into in-class learning, which would allow us to have the high school setting. This means less globe-trotting adventures than before, but it doesn’t mean none at all. They’re just reserved for weekends and vacation time.

Huey’s a studious...student. Hardworking straight-A student kinda guy, though not above getting into disagreements with a teacher on occasion. He’s in mostly academic-based extracurricular activities, but he’s got one sports activity to give his Duke-fueling feelings an outlet. He also works as an intern for Dr. Fenton Crackshell-Cabrera, who actually does have a doctorate by this point.

Dewey’s a theater kid in pretty much all regards, including actually auditioning for school plays. He’s also officially taking flight school during the summer. He’s also fairly popular at school...when he doesn’t try to force it, as he learned from Ragnarok. He’s still an eccentric Dewer, just toned down from his childhood as he matured.

Louie, of course, is a slacker kid, coasting his way through high school. While still something of a schemer, and typically offering his services out to classmates for a sorta-reasonable-for-a-high-schooler fee, he is more mindful of how his actions could potentially hurt others after the kinds of consequences he suffered as a kid due to his failure to do so in the past.

After a fair bit of persuading towards Beakley, Webby was able to enroll in school the year her brothers did. But of course, she was even less prepared going in than they were, as they at least had the experience of elementary school before moving into McDuck Manor and meeting her. But she takes it in stride, treating the experience as a new adventure. Her being Scrooge McDuck’s daughter via genetic engineering is kept from being public knowledge, and she’s found herself more comfortable calling him Uncle Scrooge anyway. Thanks to Beakley’s thorough educating, Webby ended up in the school’s gifted program and is classmates with Violet.

Lena is...I’m not sure. If Ty and Indy hadn’t already enrolled her in school after adopting her, she probably wouldn’t be enrolled now. As for May and June, they’ve begun living with Webby as her sisters and probably picked up rhyming names so that Webby doesn’t have to go by April to match. Probably like Debbie and...I dunno, what’s another ebby-sounding girl name? They regard Daisy and Donald as their aunt and uncle.

Boyd is also a teenager. Since he probably wasn’t made from some kinda special self-growing nanotech-based metal, he would’ve had to have gotten a new body to match the growth of his naturally evolving computerized mind. He’d be in a few extracurricular activities, most of which overlapping with Huey’s, and he’d be fairly popular in his own right due to how authentically nice he is. He’d also do some volunteering outside of school. His name, in spirit, still stands for Be Only Yourself Dude, but he doesn’t write it as an acronym.

Doofus has also improved overtime, due to being forced to find other ways to get what he wants outside of flaunting his money and/or forcing his will upon others. He’s mostly an awkward young man who can seem bitter at times, but now he’s more consciously aware of how his actions affects others, because he now has to be. And yet, when you get past his defenses and make a genuine attempt at friendship with him, he’s weirdly yet sorta-genuinely sweet. His relationship with Louie, and his siblings by proxy, remains and probably will always remain awkward at best.

Over on the other side of the Audubon Bay, Launchpad is fully living with Drake and Gosalyn, the latter of whom has fully committed to the Quiverwing Quack alias, while Honker still helps both her and Darkwing in heroing from the sidelines. On the school side, his high school teachers may have noticed how overqualified Honker is for his schoolwork, despite him still not being skipped ahead, and given him more fitting work. Either that or he finally does get to skip ahead and graduates early.

Depending on how successful the heroes were in finding and rescuing Waddlemeyer, he may now live with them as the family grandpa. But either way, Drake and Gosalyn have by that point warmed up to each other enough for the former to adopt the latter. And if Waddlemeyer is back, he would have (at the very least, in spirit) taken Drake as a son for a complete family dynamic.

Most of the family enemies from the kids’ preteen years are no longer an issue (and a few of the ones that still are are now Saint Canard problems), but new enemies have come up that are dealt with on the homefront from time to time. But most of the challenges the kids face come from being back in an ordinary school kid setting. But hey, just another adventure in their lives, right?))

Bölüm 45 asks

Plus a few asks from 44, and one about the fragman for 46

Read more under the cut

Anonymous asked: I cannot believe that Ayse revived the "Kemal is Serkan's real father" theory but I think I'm down for it? At least now Kiraz has one decent grandparent and he seems like genuinely nice man. I've been wishing for him to have some scenes with Serkan because the way they set up this S2 plot, they could relate to one another and I was sad to see that he spent 5 years hiding instead

I'm down for this plot! See, now that I know they're doing the long-lost-father plot, it makes all the sense in the world why Serkan doesn't like Kemal and they didn't forge a relationship in the last five years. If they had, then finding out he's his dad would have been a lot less jarring and dramatic. Finding out now and then forging the relationship I think will be a bit more meaty story so it works for me.

To me this story works on a lot of levels, and makes sense with who Serkan is and his very strained relationship with Alptekin. It's like Alptekin sensed it, and resented Serkan his whole life. For those worried that Serkan will no longer have the last name Bolat, I'm not sure where that's coming from. Maybe I'm just not familiar with other cultures, but that is his name, Alptekin raised him, adults don't just up and change their name because of genetics. If you're adopted and you meet your bio dad as an adult, you don't change your name to your bio dad's.

Serkan's name is very much a part of his identity. Which is why this story has so much potential, because it could shake Serkan to his very core to find out who he thought he was, was wrong. He thought he was unlovable, most importantly maybe he'll finally realize there was more at play there and it wasn't at fault.

Anonymous asked: There were a couple things in the last episode that didn't sit well with me. 1. I can't believe Eda made Serkan sleep outside at night and didn't feel bad in the morning when she realized he got sick! 2. The way Seyfi announced Aydan and Kemal's secret relationship. It wasn't his secret to tell, though Aydan did deserve the way everyone reacted. So I got over that pretty quick. 3. Burak!!! He's not the one for Melo. She deserves better and if they end up together in the end, I'm gonna protest.

1. Unless you're going to put the same energy into not believing that Serkan had the gal to remove his bed on the floor as a way to maneuver himself into Eda's bed before she was ready, I really can't relate. It was done for comedy, my advice is to unclench and just giggle along.

2. Or you could look at it as being unfair of Aydan to burden Seyfi with that secret and require he lie to his other employer for five years. I mean I don't disagree that it wasn't his secret to tell, but Aydan had plenty of chances, and it was time for it to come out.

3. This one we are in 100% agreement about. MELO DESERVES BETTER. I will die on this hill.

Anonymous asked: Hi! Do you think Serkan actually believes in Kerem's abilities (he trusts Eda's faith in Kerem) or is this part of his plan to win Eda back? Either way I'm okay, just wondering what you think.

No, I do not think he gained a sudden belief in Kerem's abilities, but I do think he believes in Eda. And if Eda believes in Kerem then when push comes to shove that is enough for Serkan. Of course, he did it as part of his plan to win Eda back. Serkan is taking every opportunity to let Eda know that he respects her and believes in her and I think this was another example of that. There was also an aspect of him trying to win over another person in Eda's circle who was suspicious of him. The fewer people he has working against him, the better! He knows he has no shot with Burak or Ayfer, so this episode he worked on Melo and Kerem. But mostly it was him trying to make Eda's life easier, by smoothing over a personnel problem she was having, thus making working out of Art Life a more attractive option for her. All of those things in one!

Anonymous asked: What do you think about Eda and Piril's friendship? This episode really highlighted how close they've gotten.

Yes, they have gotten close, and I'm happy Eda has a friend, but at the same time I don't trust Piril. This is a woman who discarded Eda and embraced Selin when she was manipulating and abusing a brain-damaged Serkan.

Eda might be able to forget, but I can't. Also as a character she's just boring, rigid and humorless. One of my least favorites on screen.

That being said I do like the triad dynamic of Kiraz/Can, Serkan/Engin, and Eda/Piril, it was fun when they were calling each other at the same time.

Anonymous asked: Idk if they reached out to Maya just because she looked like Hande considering she had no acting experience, but this little girl is like the best casting I've seen. The chemistry with Hande and Kerem is amazing. She's so expressive. I am a Kiraz stan.

She's doing a fantastic job, precious thing! I have no idea how they found her, I know she was an instagram model, but the SCK casting director strikes again. This season doesn't work if we don't fall in love with Kiraz. Thankfully, we did!

Anonymous asked: Hi! Since it seems that we will have 13 episodes, do you think that Edser reconciliation/wedding will be left for the finale, 12-13 ep? Cause Ayse loves to drag and keep them apart.

I think the wedding might be closer to the end, but I think reconciliation will be a bit sooner than that.

However, I have to say that it's really not like they're apart.. is it? I mean this episode we had them living together, sort of casually planning their future together. Next episode we have them pretending to be married and ramping up the sexual tension to white-hot-sun levels, these are all good things. With episodes like this, I don't personally consider the show dragging it out.

In fandom I see a lot of peeps upset because Eda isn't getting immediately back with Serkan and I am feeling inpatient as well, do you think the writers are making a mistake keeping them apart?

Again, I guess my response to you is, by what definition was this episode "keeping them apart?"

Yes, they aren't having sex, but they are living together, working together, raising their daughter together, and I'm a-okay with having a couple of delicious episodes of that while they are still not fully back together romantically. Let's be real, they're still waking up in bed together, flirting, and having a romantic dinner together, so it's not like things aren't moving forward, they are. I'd advise putting aside your impatience, and just sit back, relax, and let the story take its course. There is no need to be anxious with this one. They are going to end up with their happily ever after together, but what we're seeing right now is delightful. It's them in family and domestic situations, them with their child. Most shippers only dream of getting to see this.

This sort of goes back to my stance on episodes 16-24, I know that was a frustrating time for a lot of fans because they were "broken up" but I've always said they may have been officially broken up, but they were in a committed relationship that entire time. And I enjoyed those episodes from that perspective, that tension of them being "apart" but still functioning as a unit and still being emotionally tied together underneath it all. There's kind of a similar situation here, they aren't officially back together, Eda is resisting him, but they are in a committed relationship and I don't understand what the need is to rush through this part? Enjoy the sexual tension of them living together, but not sleeping together. Enjoy the rom com romp of Serkan trying to get in her bed, and Eda taking steps to keep him out. Enjoy their daughter putting them in situations that force them into close proximity, and enjoy them falling into easy compatibility without even trying. Enjoy Serkan planning romantic dinners, and Eda enjoying it despite her every effort to protect her heart.

To me this is very good stuff, and spending this time being impatient and wanting what didn't happen yet, instead of enjoying what did happen is pretty much the recipe for unhappiness not just with this show, but life.

Anonymous asked: i feel like i've seen the exact same frustrations ppl have had with eda right now back around the 20s too after serkan told her about her parents' secret. it was like, now that he's told her the truth, she should automatically forgive him and get back together. same thing happening here, with him accepting his role as kiraz's father. it feels like the same impatience that's put on eda to just forgive him already bc everyone wants happy edser and she's in the way lol.. like girl needs time!

Agreed, and it makes me wonder if these folks have ever watched television before, lmao. Patience! There's a story unfolding and from the first 6 episodes it's clear they have a season long arc planned. All in due time.

Eda spent five years thinking that Serkan stopped loving her, and discarded her for work. The second time he used that excuse to break her heart. My goodness, it's more than okay if she needs a little time to adjust and learn how to trust him again. PLUS that means we get to watch him work on her, try to make inroads, romance her, forge a relationship with his daughter and earn Eda's trust back. What's bad in that?

What did you think of the fragman? It's kind of dumb and unrealistic that they have to dance for a school admission interview.

LMAO. Yes, yes it is, but my question to you is, sana ne?

I mean why do you care if the set up is dumb or not? Or if it's realistic? It's a device to get Serkan and Eda to pretend to be married before they're fully back together and an excuse for us to see Edser smash themselves together in a sensual tangle of limbs while they pretend to be unaffected, while both are being engulfed in USTy flames.

I'm not complaining, why are you?

Come on, this show is silly, it has been from day one, enjoy the fact that we are getting silly plots that force our couple into hilarious and hot situations, because Hande and Kerem are going to give us gold, I guarantee it and I'm going to smile through every second watching it.

xxxxxxxxxx

These asks are from episode 44, they came in and I didn't have time to answer before 45 aired:

Anonymous asked: Do you think there is a point when there are too many “parallels” and it becomes more like scenes are being recycled? Because I kinda felt that way in the last episode. Like she’s just tossing in as many things as she can from those first 11 episodes but I’ve already watched those and Id rather we focus more character progression. I feel like they regressed from those honest conversations last week and were back to being petty this week.

I guess my answer is... no, I don't think there have been too many parallels. Episode 44 was partly about truth bubbling to the surface, with the biggest truth being that Serkan has been in love with Eda every minute of every day since they parted. That is a very important thing for Eda to understand and know and they really can't move forward until she does, because she felt unloved and forgotten all those years. Most of the parallels were illustrating that by showing that he held on to their history, he remembered their history and he honored it. Okay by me.

Anonymous asked: There were some amazing dialogues in the episode. I have two that tie for top. One was when Kiraz said that Serkan was her wish (when blowing her birthday candles), and the other was when Serkan said Apollo was never going to give up on the woman he loves nor on the cherries! Oh my heart had feels both times. What were your favourite dialogues in the episode?

Oh man my head is in 45 now, but both of those examples of yours were great. I loved both of them.

The other than springs to mind is while fishing, Eda telling Serkan that he didn't need to be perfect for Kiraz to love him, he just had to be himself.

Swoon.

That's so important for Serkan to hear, because he doesn't think he's worthy of love as himself, so hearing that from Eda is impactful.

Anonymous asked: reading your ep review, i think a big reason some people are hanging on to hate the s2 plot no matter what are just bc they hate the writer. of course not everyone, but a lot of people will just hate on anything she writes out of spite, even if objectively the episode is very good. idk why that is or when ppl decided they hated her but it's not warranted at all imo. i can understand not liking the premise of this season, but after watching it so far there has been SUCH an improvement edser-wise.

People can like, dislike, love, hate anything they want. Consuming entertainment doesn't have to be a team sport. That being said, from what I've seen I'd agree with your assessment. Teams have formed (Anti-Ayse, Pro-Ayse, etc) and the former are too invested in hating everything she does, the former possibly too forgiving at times. That's their choice, but I have to say I feel bad for the anti brigade, this is a show they loved, and most of them are still watching, but they've completely sabotaged themselves from finding any joy in any of it and I think they're going to regret it once it's over.

Also season 2 is so much better than I thought it could be. I honestly thought there was no way to get back to the early quality, but it's here. The show is really watchable and fun this season, and it's a shame for those who've let their attitudes get so negative that they can't enjoy it.

Anonymous asked: Ok so I'm aware this would be highly uncharacteristic of a dizi - but if they know there's only 6 eps left, my dream would be no more big bad events and just spend it rebuilding EdSer as a couple and a family. Would that be too much to ask lol. They've jumped from one disaster to another. Since we're at the end & they have the luxury of knowing it, I just want to see them working through things as a real unit. They've dated for like 7 eps out of 45? Can we get that above 10 at least????

Congratulations! Because that's exactly what we've gotten so far in season 2. Once we got past the trauma of the 5 year time jump, all the drama has been internal to Eda and Serkan and their relationship. The whole season so far has been about rebuilding Edser as a couple and a family. And if you're watching without the tauntruming twitter teens in your ear, you'd realize we ARE watching them work through things as a real unit.

I'll say this until I'm blue in the face (apparently) just because they are not currently sexing each other up, does not mean they aren't emotionally doing all the things necessary to reach their full potential as a couple.

They are. It's happening. Enjoy it.

Fated: The Beginning

Pairing: Reno x Reader

Summary: Ordinary days sometimes house the most extraordinary moments, even if we don’t know it at the time. On that fate filled day you would have never expected the red haired boy to one day become a Turk. You had no idea that your kindness would be repaid in ways you’ve never dreamed about. You had no idea he was the one you were meant to be with. Here’s your story.

Prelude

Today is a day just like any other day. Sitting at your desk among your many co-workers, you are part of the HR team at Shinra. Is this want you wanted? Not really. Okay, not even close, but it pays the bills. Another email about an internal issue in another one of the departments have you sighing in exasperation. 

There is suddenly an excited murmur among the department and you turn in just enough time to see a tall lean redhead come sauntering up to your desk. You recognize him immediately; even though he is no longer lanky having grown into his height, with lean with broad shoulders. His shirt stretched taut over his muscles making all the women stare. His hair is a vibrant healthy red no longer dulled by malnutrition. His gaze is almost sultry as you are locked in place by his deep green eyes. You blink up at him in confusion at a loss for words.

Reno…

No, not just Reno… 

Reno of the Turks.

He smirks down at you before he sits casually on your desk, like this is a common occurrence in your world, as if he does this all the time, and presents a letter to you. 

“I wanted to be the one to deliver this to you,” he says with a casual shrug at your silent question, his voice is deep and velvety. 

“Thank you,” you say in shock as you take the letter into your hands inspecting it while ignoring your curious co-workers around you.

“I bet you don’t even remember-” Reno begins.

“I do,” you interrupted as you glance up at him through your lashes, “I remember you, Reno. You’ve done well for yourself.” You say as you lean back in your seat to look up at him easily, casually opening the envelope in your hands. A delivery from a Turk is rarely a good thing and your curiosity gets the better of you. 

He sends you an easy grin, completely comfortable and confident in his place and in himself. Of course, you had heard about the successes of Reno. Your dad kept up with his progress and would casually mention him to you from time to time. But even if your dad hadn’t kept you up to date, the Turks are quite notorious, and Reno isn’t exactly one to blend in.

“Indeed I have, though it’s not exactly the life I had pictured,” he leans forward conspiratorially and with a wink he murmurs, “it’s even better.”

You chuckle as he casually leans back, a smirk on his handsome face regarding you before he indicates the letter in your hands. You pull it from the envelope and glance over it before you gaze up at him with wide eyes. He winks and puts a finger to his lips.

“So, long time no see, how’ve you been?” Reno asks just like you are old friends, shifting his posture comfortably on your desk. Though, perhaps you are at this point. 

“I’ve been good, you know, just working and hoping to move up,” you say with a shrug.

“How’s your dad?” Reno asks good-naturedly. 

“Oh, that’s right,” cuts in a snarky voice, “the ‘princess’ gets things handed to her on a platter.”

You glance over at your co-worker as she regards you with disdain. Reno glares over at her and asks in a sharp tone, “did we invite you into this conversation?”

“Uhh… N-no…” Your co-worker stutters, trying to avoid his menacing gaze.

“Then mind your own business,” his voice is almost a growl that sends a shiver down your back. She shrinks down into her seat and quickly averts her eyes back to her work.

You giggle at him, “I had wondered if I was going to get to meet him.”

“Meet who?” Reno asks as he glances down towards you in confusion, the hostility from a second ago completely vanished. 

“‘Reno of the Turks’,” you say with a smile. 

He sends you a sly look, “well, if you wanted to meet him all you had to do was ask.” He leans forward on your desk, holding your gaze before pulling away with a subtle wink.

“‘Wanted’ is a strong word, I think I’m happy with just ‘Reno’,” you say with a soft smile.

His eyes soften, if you hadn’t been watching him you would have missed it. 

“So, you never answered my question,” Reno says clearing his throat, “how’s your dad?”

“He’s doing well! He’s now head of his department, and his people love him.”

Reno nods his head, “I may need to stop by and see him, it’s been a while…” 

“You should, he would like that. He’s very proud of you, you know…”

“He is?” The surprise is evident in his voice. You know he has no biological family of his own, the Turks had clearly become family for him. 

“Of course, you made him look good,” you say with a wink.

He laughs with you, “Of course I did. How many of his recruits became a Turk?”

“Only one, but seriously, he keeps up with you and he doesn’t often keep up with any of his recommendations. He even keeps me up to date with you, so I know he’s really proud of the fact that you made it.”

“He’s a good man,” he says with a nod as he avoids your eyes. 

“Thanks, Reno. So, what turned you into my delivery man?” You ask as you lean your elbows on the desk and rest your chin in your hand grinning up at him. 

He chuckles as he rubs his chin, “well, I recognized your name in the stack and knew that I needed to stop by and see you. After all, you are perfect for this.”

“I am?” You ask with a tilt of your head. 

“What?! Of course! You aren’t afraid of anything,” he winks as he stands up and checks his phone. He regards it with an exaggerated frown, you nod your in understandment. 

“You’re right, I’m not…” you smirked as you watch him walk away. 

“Not even the Turks?” he inquires teasingly over his shoulder, the phone now at his ear.

“Not even the Turks,” you repeated, a sly grin sliding onto your face.

“See you soon,” Reno dismisses with a wave as he heads for the door. He’s speaking low and fast into the receiver.

“See you…” You lift your hand up in a half-wave, you aren’t sure he even saw. You’re still more shocked at seeing him after all this time, and now the letter in your hands. The letter is your chance to move up, and not just by a little bit, but to the top; to achieve a more exciting life, instead of just barely getting by and pushing papers at a desk surrounded by hostility.

“Are you a Turk candidate?” Whispers one of your co-workers. You could almost call this particular one a friend, if only she wasn’t so exhausting to deal with. 

“Umm… No… Reno and I just knew each other briefly when we were younger. He was just stopping by to say hi, and deliver some mail he found.”

“Are you sure that’s it and you’re not just his next whore?” The snarky coworker from before spat bitterly.

“What is your problem?” You ask in annoyance turning towards her.

She gives you a haughty smirk, “you just think you’re so great because of who your daddy is and this job was basically handed to you on a platter. Now you even have a Turk to fight your battles for you? How pathetic.”

“We literally have the same job, doing the same thing, and you think this is glamorous? I work just as hard as you, probably harder since I’m not sticking my nose into everybody’s business. Maybe focus more on your work and less on your spite and you might actually get promoted. Also, my relationship with Reno, regardless of what it is, is none of your business. But you can trust me when I say I don’t need him to fight my battles. I can do that just fine,” you bite back.

She scowls at you, about to hiss another retort when your name is called over the com system, along with 4 other names, to meet at a specific conference room. With a shaky breath, you stand up and head out. You can feel your heart racing as nerves wrack your body. 

You gaze around at the other candidates, three men and one other woman, all looking equally confused and gripping a similar letter in their hands. No one says anything before the screen on the far side of the room springs to life, on the other side is the Rufus Shinra. 

“Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. I’m sure you are all very confused as to why I have called you here. As you have ascertained from the letter given to you this morning, I am in need of a personal assistant and you have all been selected as potential candidates. Since this is a time-sensitive matter, we will be doing the interviews today. You have all been chosen since you are the best at what you do and hold qualities that are valuable to the position. You all also come highly recommended by a member of the corporation and I look forward to speaking with each one of you. Thank you.”

Quick and to the point, you would expect nothing less of Rufus Shinra.

The first man called into the office is a serious-looking man named Chase. Your right leg begins to bounce with nervous energy and you just stare at one spot on the wall in front of you. You were not expecting this to be what you did today. Next up, was a man that resembled more the likeness of a snake than an actual man. You don’t bother listening to his name, he’s too smug for you to pay much attention to. Shortly after, your name was called next and you walk into the room with your back straight, a serious look on your face.

You regarded the four Turks in the room calmly. They are positioned behind Rufus Shinra’ desk and you read it for what it is -- an intimidation tactic. You catch Rufus’ eyes and give him your most professional smile, holding out your hand to shake and introduce yourself confidently. 

“Miss. (L.Name), you have come to me highly recommended. Please, tell me what you could bring to this position?”

You give him another one of your best smiles before you begin your answer, “thank you, sir. I am very efficient, hard-working, and reliable. I always strive to solve problems creatively and effectively. I work independently, as well as in a team with no problems. I-”

“These are very wonderful answers, Miss. (L.Name). However, everyone I have chosen today is efficient, hard-working, and reliable. They are the best in their current department. What I want to know is what sets you apart from them.” 

Your eyes widen from being suddenly interrupted. Rufus Shinra regards you coolly from behind his sleek marble desk. Your eyes are in your lap and you glance up just enough to see the Turks gazing at you with unreadable expressions. You inhale a sigh, a smirk slides its way onto your lips as Reno’s words echo in your mind, and you throw caution to the wind.

“Well sir, I was told recently I’m not scared of anything. And I mean anything. I don’t just mean work-related challenges, even though I can tackle them head-on as well. I mean, I was almost assaulted on my way home from work last week and I had to beat three drunks into the ground with the lid of a trash can,” your gaze is fierce as you regard the past week’s events,  “I don’t take anyone’s shit, and I don’t particularly care who they are or how important they think they are, I don’t tolerate being disrespected. So to put it frankly, if you are looking for an assistant that will wipe your ass every day and praise everything that you do… Then I am afraid I’m not that person. However, if you want an assistant that will contribute valuably to Shinra and it’s future, all while actually getting things done, then you can do yourself a favor and hire me now.”

The room is silent at your speech and you know in the next moment you are either getting promoted or fired. When a smirk slides onto his lips and a light chuckle escapes them, you start to feel the tension leave your shoulders. 

“He was right about you… You are perfect…” Rufus muses more to himself than to you. 

“My father?” You ask instinctively. 

“Reno,” he says as he indicates the redhead to his left, “he said that you’re perfect for the job. I admit at first I didn’t believe him. You seemed too compliant, but, as it turns out, he was right.”

“So, I start Monday?” You ask with a sly smile as you regard the group before you.

“Yes you will, unfortunately, I still have to do interviews to keep up appearances. The job is yours though.”

You can’t stop the smile on your face, “thank you, sir! You won’t regret this.”

“Let’s hope not…” Rufus glances between you and Reno, just as Reno sends you a signature wink. 

“We shall discuss the details of your new salary on Monday, in the meantime, you have the rest of the day off. You will be moving into your new apartment closer to Shinra and my condo.”

“Oh?”

“Someone will be in contact with you this afternoon about your new accommodations.”

“Thank you, I look forward to working with you,” you say sincerely, getting up to shake his hand once more before leaving the room. 

Your expression gives nothing away as you leave the room and head back to your desk to gather your things. Though, there is an energetic skip in your step as you head to the door. 

Several hours later, as you are finishing cleaning off your bookshelf there is a knock at your door. You furrow your brow and go to answer it. Opening it, you find Reno on the other side. He looks up and into your eyes the moment the door opens. 

“Figured you might be hungry,” he says, indicating the pizza in his hands.

You smile as you open the door wider, “a man after my own heart.”

Reno smiles as he walks inside and inspects the place. 

“Nice place! I think you’re gonna love your new one too, though.” He sets the pizza box down on your kitchen counter. 

“You think so?”

“Yeah, I do. You’ll be pretty close to all of us too.”

You walk to the cabinet to grab plates for you both. You hand him one before he opens the box and you both dig in. 

“You’re right on time. I was starting to get hungry.”

“Yeah? How’s packing going? You need any help?” He asks around a mouth full of pizza.

“I couldn’t ask you to help me, Reno. You’ve done a lot for me already, recommending me for this job and all.”

“What are you talking about? You were already a candidate. I just put the bug in the boss’ ear. Plus there is no way that I could stand Tseng’s pick,” he says with a shudder.

“Let me guess! That really serious looking guy!”

“The one who never even changed his tone the entire time,” Reno says with a groan. 

“Yeah, working with him would have been brutal…” You say as an afterthought as you take a bite of pizza. 

“There would have been two of them then…” You share an overexaggerated look of horror with Reno before you both burst out laughing. 

“I’m glad he picked you,” he leans against the counter sending you a sly look.

“Oh? Why is that?”

“Well, you actually have a personality, plus you are WAY easier on the eyes than those other guys.”

You scoff as you playfully punch him, “so you just wanted me to have the job because of my looks?”

“Hey! I said you have a personality first!”

You laugh heartily, glancing over at him. “Thanks, Reno,” you say, bumping him lightly with your shoulder.

“Don’t mention it,” Reno shrugs.

You both fall into a comfortable silence before you head to your fridge and pull out some wine. 

“Want some?” you offer, as you go to grab a glass from the shelf. 

“You don’t have any beer, do you?”

You frown slightly, “No… You want anything else?”

“Naw, the wine is fine…”

“Sorry, I’m not much of a beer drinker…”

“S’okay, it’s your house… Plus I should have grabbed some on the way over.”

You pour him a glass and hand it to him. He thanks you quietly before he takes a sip, “not bad…” he regards the liquid in his glass. 

After a few minutes, Reno claps his hands, “come on! We gotta get you packed!”

“Reno! I told you that you don’t have to help!”

“Well too bad because I am!” He says as he undoes the clasp on his suit jacket and throws it over the back of your couch. 

“Is the apartment furnished?” You inquire as you glance around your own place. 

“Nope, I’m taking you shopping tomorrow while the movers come to pick up your things.”

“Wait! What? Tomorrow? The movers are coming tomorrow?!” You begin to panic.

“Yep! That’s why we gotta get you packed!”

You curse under your breath, “you could have said something sooner!”

“And ruin dinner? That was top notch cheap pizza!”

You hide your smile and roll your eyes, “you’re ridiculous…”

“You love it,” he smirks as he grabs a box and heads into the kitchen. 

It’s at that moment a small meow is heard from the floor and Reno looks down in surprise. His eyebrows practically jump up into his hairline and his mouth opens in surprise. 

“Is this!?” He exclaims.

“It sure is!” You giggle as Milly skirts around Reno and rushes to you. You pick her up as she regards the new person warily sniffing the air in his direction. You pet her to help calm her nerves and speak gently to her as you do so. She eventually relaxes against you while still regarding Reno with distrust.

“I can’t believe you still have her… Then again I don’t know how long cats live,” he scratches the back of his head in slight embarrassment.

“They live for a while. I once heard of a woman whose cat was 32 when she died.”

“The cat or the lady!?” He asks in surprise.

“The cat!!” You laugh.

Reno chuckles as he slowly approaches you and holds out his hand for the cat to sniff. She does so hesitantly before rubbing her face against his hand. He chuckles again as he pets her, astonished that she is in your arms. 

His eyes soften as he watches her rub her face against his outstretched hand, no doubt recalling the last time he saw her. 

“It seems so long ago… a lifetime…” Reno says softly. 

“I guess for you it was…” You glance up at him with a smile. 

“Yeah… My life changed a lot that night… I owe your dad a lot,” he murmured wistfully, “He got me off the streets, helped me make something of myself. Even when I was talking about my dreams that night, I didn’t know if I would ever escape that hellhole. Now look at me, I’m a Turk. Not exactly the life I was picturing back then, but I’m not going to complain about it.”

“I’m happy for you Reno… People were so cruel to you…”

“Hey now! Enough with the sappiness! We’ve got to get you packed! You move in tomorrow!” He turns away abruptly leaving Milly meowing in annoyance that her pets stopped suddenly. 

“Oh! Right! Okay!” You exclaim in surprise at the sudden topic change. You understood though, he doesn't want to relive his old life, he left it behind so many years ago. Perhaps this time though you’ll get to be the friends that the two of you never got to be.

With that, you both get to work packing up your apartment, throwing jokes and comments at one another along with knick knacks that you each find along the way. The playful banter is something you didn’t know you needed, it keeps the nerves at bay. Or maybe it’s Reno that you didn’t know you needed...

Notes: Apparently there is a... cam guy? I don’t really know anything about him except his name is Reno, every time I’m looking for Reno gifs his gifs show up too. So there are just clips of this guy shaking his ass on the bed and I’m always so surprised when they show up! I can’t... Anyway long time since this was updated but I hope you enjoy it anyway!! Shout out to my Beta: @westsideeffectsvary​

Please like, reblog and comment! You know all that good stuffs!

A real family (Pt 1)

Summary: Robert Downey juniors teenage daughter lives with her mum, after her parents divorce. Robert doesn’t get any access to see her, and knows nothing about her life. After her abusive step dad goes to far and puts him in hospital, can Robert save her before

Basically I’m going to take on the evil step sister approach but make it male version. But whilst adding in physical abuse

Warnings: abuse, depression, hospitals.

“Y/N” your dad screamed from the kitchen. You couldn’t remember a time your dad hadn’t been screaming. Your house echoed so much you could have sworn that half of the bloody town could hear your mums shreak.

“I’m comming” you yell from your room. Big mistake. But it was to late now. You should have just kept your mouth shut, but then again, that outcome wouldn’t have been any better of an outcome.

You slowly make your way down the stairs into the kitchen where you see your two step brothers, and step father sitting around the kitchen table. You know sneaking in unnoticed isn’t an option so you except your defeat.

“What have I told you about yelling” says your stepfather in a sturn voice. You don’t reply, instead you keep your head down and look into your lap

“WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU” he screeches at you throwing his plate at your shoulder causing it to shatter and cut into your shoulder blade, making you wince

“Answer me you worthless piece of shit ” he screames at you and you can see your step brother preparing to throw their plates

“Not to do it” you mumble.

“ WHAT WAS THAT” he roared at you, slowly raising from the table, causing you to fall back off your stool and against a wall.

“Nothing sir, you told me not to do it” you say clearly with the small bit of confidence you have left. Suddenly a sharp object collides with your eye and you feel a stinging, painfully burning sensation. Your chew down in your lip to not make a scene.

“Was that talking back” you hear your oldest step brother say, whilst slowly decreasing to ground between you.

“ANSWER US” you hear your brother screech throughout the ringing in your ear.

“I’m sorry sirs, it won’t happen again” you say hiding your face in your hands.

Suddenly a foot collides with your tiny figure and you feel a snap, you know you’ve broken your second rib in a week, but there’s nothing you can do.

“I have heard that excuse far to much Y/N, I think you deserve a punishment” said your father breaking the ground between you and the group of towering men.

You wished that your mum was still alive. Maybe everything would be peaceful if your mum was still alive. If you hadn’t caused her death, as your father said.

“Please no” You beg, before you were sudenly shoved against a wall hearing even more bones crack.

“No more talking back” said your step dad dragging you by the hair up to stairs and into his bedroom door, locking it after being followed by your “brothers”. You closed your eyes as tight as you could, trying to ignore the horrendous pain that littered your body, and distract yourself from what you prayed would never come.

The screames of protest and pain that came next could have woken up the whole country if anyone listened hard enough, however living in a very remote part of the town meant no one could hear the cruel ness that your “family” was subjecting you to.

Xxxx

Robert was trying to sleep, he had to be up early for filming tomorrow, however there was something else on his mind. You. You were officially turning 16 tomorrow, and for a parent that is a very scary time, however this birthday was fillled with sadness and regret.

He had fought long and hard for custody over you for two years untill the court concluded that your mum could take better care of you. The last he ever saw of you was a seven year old little girl crying because she would never see her father again. Your mother would not let him ever speak to you, no matter how hard he tried, and he could not find you on any social media. He wished you were safe but something in his gut was telling him that something was wrong.

He couldn’t act on his feeling however as he was not granted any access to see you, therefor he would be breaking the law.

The last he remembered of you was your long ( hair colour) hair, and smiling face ripped away from him. He was sure you’d grown up by now and had changed physically greatly. However he wished you remembered him. He wished you and his current family could live together happily celebrating big milestones together.

“Can’t sleep” said a voice from behind him. Robert hadn’t noticed he’d moved from the inside of his trailer to the outside seating area.

“Umm, I’m just thinking” he said

“I’s this about Y/N ?” Said Chris Hemsworth taking a seat next to him.

“Yeah” said Robert sadly.

The entire avengers cast new about You. It had come out on a drunk night on the town, however no one had seen it effect him this much... ever.

“It’s her birthday tomorrow, her 16th” he said sadly.

“I’m sorry mate, I could never imagine not seeing one of my children, even living without them for that fact” said Chris trying to console your father to the best of his abilities.

“Something just isn’t sitting right with me, i know somethings wrong with her” said Robert.

“Have you tried getting custody again, even just visiting rights” asked Chris

“The case is to small, It’ll just be dismissed” said Robert sadly

“Keep your head up mate. Not long untill she leaves home , and then I’m sure she’ll want to meet her father” said Chris

“I guess your right” said your dad sighing in defeat”. However he still couldn’t shake the feeing something was wrong. He’d been feeling it a lot lately, and a fathers gut is never wrong

Xxxxx

“Y/N, pick up the pace” said your gym instructor. Of course today was the day you ran the mile. Every bone in your body was aching, and you were sure your body was running on adrenaline. You couldn’t get the disgusting feeling of betrail, and violation off you. You remembered every moment from the previous night, from the almost shattered shoulder bone, to the moment you were violated and entered. It made you want to cry however crying was a weakness. Crying was more reason for them to beat the emotion out of You.

You weren’t the slowest runner, actually you were quiet good, that’s why your gym teacher was so tough on you, she knew you had potential, if only she knew what was going on at home.

You finish the Lap slower than your usual time, however you could feel your body start to shut down.

“Everyone go get a drink.... Y/N not you, I wanna talk” said your coach watching everyone leave. You could see your vision start to loose focus, causing you to reach for your bottle, and chug half of it down.

“Honey, what’s going on. Your average is dropping, I’m getting worried”

You couldn’t reply, your ears started to ring, and your long sport top was causing you to sweat and fall of the seat, onto the floor, hitting your head. You could hear the distant ringing of your name however your to far gone. You feel your body start to go limp, and everything to go dark, you start to fade out of consciousness and the last thing you heard was screaming to call 911.

Xxxxxxxx

Robert had just finished filming and it was lunch time for the avengers crew. Almost all the crew members were there today, it was a big day for shooting and very busy, so getting to finally eat lunch was a blessing.

He took a seat around a table seating, Scarlett, Mark, Jeremy, Chris Evans, Chris Hemsworth, and Tom hidleston. They were all in the middle of a conversation when they saw Him sit down.

“Hey, you doing alright” said scarlet dropping the previous discussion.

“Peachy” he replied taking a bite of a sandwich. He suddenly saw one of the producers running up to the table with a frantic look on him face holding the main phone.

“You need to answer this. It’s important”the feeling of dread once again sat in the bottom of his stomach. he instantly answered the phone, his face Pailing almost imidiately, causing the other members of the cast to drop their food and commence worry.

“ I’ll be there as soon as I can” said your dad hanging up the phone.

He looked towards the manager receiving a nod.

“Take all the time you need, we’ll rearrange the schedule, let us know how it goes” said the director taking back the phone.

Robert quickly took of from the set, already on the phone to his wife.

“Honey I’ve got to go to Arizona, Y/N’s in the hospital

Xxxxxxx

You could feel your head pounding. The beeping around you didn’t stop. The fact that you couldn’t move your body didn’t help much either. The black vision slowly started to become brighter causing you to squint your eyes in pain. A forced wince came out of your mouth. Slowly you opened your eyes and started to see the white hospital room around you.

You could see the countless wires connected to you and the beeping of the heart monitor, was ringing in your ears. You tried to sit yourself up but you found that your body was restricted, and you were struggling to sit up.

“That’s not going to work honey, you’ve cracked your ribs, and we can’t risk them breaking again” said the nurse walking in.

“Oh” you say in a quiet voice resting your head back on the pillow.

“How are you feeling honey” said the nurse bustling around the room.

“I’m fine”

“Sweetheart, I’ve had my fair share patients. And the lies I’ve heard... I can’t help you unless you tell me the truth” she said

You sigh and look down to your lap.

“Everything hurts” you say in a quiet voice, trying not to gain any attention

“I suspected, your not afraid of needles are you” asked the nurse kindly.

“Not really no” you say.

“Y/N, You have to be honest with me. I’m only trying to help you” said the nurse politely.

“Umm.. I haven’t had a needle since I was 7. I’d have no way of knowing” you say as honest as you could.

“It’ll just be a pinch, you’ll be fine”. Said the nurse.

Suddenly you feel a pinch in your arm. You’d been through much worse, this felt like nothing.

“All done” said the nurse putting a plaster on your arm.

“Can I ask you a question”

“Go ahead”

“What’s going to happen the them” you ask.

A small sigh left her lips. not knowing if you were ready for the news she hesitated...

“All three of them are missing. Found out you were in the hospital and did a runner. The police have locked down the surrounding boarders to try and find them” said the nurse.

You sighed and nodded your head.

“Why are they taking such large measures” you said.

“Y/N there’s some things you haven’t been told... how much to do you know about your father. Asked the nurse with a smile on her face.

“Mum never talked about him. I haven’t even heard him mentioned since I was seven. I didn’t think he’d want anything to do with me” you say slowly lowering your head towards your lap.

“I can assure you hon he wanted so much to have you in his life. He’s right outside that door and he wants to see his little girl”

“What do you mean” you asked.

Suddenly there was a nock on the door, and In walked another woman, in a very fancy dress suit

“Hello Y/N” said the lady taking a seat beside the white framed bed.

“What’s going on” you asked sinking deeper into the sheets of the knitted white sheets.

“ I have your father outside this door as I’m sure you’ve been told... and he’s very keen to meet you... how would you feel about meeting him”

You didn’t get to sat another word before a medium sized man walked into the room. You couldn’t believe your eyes... the world had to be playing tricks on you... there was no way.. no way at all.

“You have to be kidding me”

To be continued

The good Villain - 8

Based on the prompt “You’re the villain and you know that you just want the ‘good guys’ to understand why”

Pairing: Loki x Fem!Reader Content: Mission with all it entails: violence, killing, gore, angst. We also have a bit of fluff going on at some point though it’s paired with a neat scoop of denial. And much more! A/N: Busy day today! Gonna attend a wedding that’s been 20 years in the waiting or so, and it’s Superbowl night which is always fun…though it’s more for the company for me. Thanks for all the loving, reblogs, and likes!

Chapter 8

…   Reader   …

He was everywhere you went. Not just the meetings where you and the Avengers put your heads together in an effort to intensify the search for the last Leech but also when you were going to the kitchen or even at night, Loki would either already be there or appear shortly after. One day Romanoff showed you the gym with all its equipment begging to be used and it took less than an hour before the Asgardian revealed the library, telling you how you could normally find him there.

At first you suspected he was guarding you due to lack of trust. You may not have been a prisoner anymore, there was no cell at least, but you were still a stranger disrupting the natural balance in a group vital to this planet. As time passed, however, and you spent time on scouting missions and at the team’s base it became evident that his reasoning was personal.

This theory was solidified the day Banner announced to have found a potential suspect.

Together with Stark and Romanoff, he had created a series of algorithms scouring the digital records of Terrans within a certain area to compare medical data, and social media, plus changes in their behavioural patterns. The metal-armed Barnes and his friend with the shield had left to verify the suspicion before you were notified.

All you could do was wait. The moment they returned, you confronted them.

…

“Another restless night?” Loki’s voice is a clear chime calling you back to reality gently.

Swinging down from the bar to land on the floor, you shake your limbs out after the exercises without worthying him an answer. Just go. Of course, he does not leave, choosing instead to draw nearer.

Plopping onto a bench along the wall, you feel the restlessness return as an itch in your legs and a chest full of knots of worry. Tomorrow. You have stopped counting the time spent hunting the monsters that killed your crew – your friends – a long time ago. One goal. One all-consuming mission culminating with a plan that you have gotten approved by the Captain. Tomorrow. By this time tomorrow, your hunt will be over. I should be relieved, but I am not.

As if reading your mind, Loki nudges you gently back to the present. “Do not worry, my pet.” He sits down next to you, calm and cool. “Everything will go well…the plan is good.”

“I know.” Being near to him soothes your nerves if only a little.

“Then you can clear your name, live your life.” There is an edge to his voice which you cannot place. “Regain your honour.”

“No.” You can see the answer startles him. “I will return, but not to clear my name.”

“You are innocent! You may have escaped prison, but you got justice fo-“

“Justice?” You barely contain the sarcastic laughter as you round on him. “Do not pretend to think this ever was about justice or honour! It was revenge and nothing more! The leeches are simply a species doing what they must whereas I was the one who brought my crew in danger…th- hrm…the one who brought their end upon them.” Ignoring his protests, you carry on, unable to stop despite a breaking voice now you have started talking. “I shall return home…face the Elders and accept my punishment with peace in my heart.” Fists balled and body shaking, restlessness has morphed through anger into determination.

“You’ve nothing to atone for!” he cries out, a cold hand grasping yours and sending (not unpleasant) shivers along your spine, “y- ‘tis time for you to live.”

“That is not your decision…and why do you even care?”

From what you have learned about the smooth-talking God of Mischief, the sight of him sitting there with his mouth ajar yet nothing to say is rare. A soft blush paints the pale face even as he gathers his wits once more. “At least stay for the celebration. The uh they always mark a successful completion of a mission with a party.”

You hesitate, knowing that it will only be postponing the inevitable. Still, a little chip of your heart is urging you to accept the offer. One night of freedom. Looking down, you realize his hand has not moved but that at some point you have returned the gesture by wrapping your fingers around his. Oh. Gingerly, perhaps not to appear rude, you free yourself from the connection and start to leave.

“…[Y/N]…?”

Why do I hesitate? Maybe the question is unnecessary if only you would accept a new feeling inside your chest. “Fine, I will participate in the revels.”

 …   Loki   …

It is a dreary morning with grey clouds hanging low over the city, shielding it from the beginning day at least until the sun eventually would gain enough power to evaporate the layer. For now, however, it also served as a natural softener of all sounds as the mismatch tea of Midgardians, Asgardians, and a Betan move towards the house in the suburbs.

The entrance is swift and quiet. In groups of two or three, they move from room to room. Loki is among those covering the ground floor and it allows him to see the father of the family rounding on Barnes who only keeps a safe distance between them thanks to a strong hold with the metal arm. By the Norns! What they had expected to be a docile civilian opens his mouth further than humanly possible to reveal a black nothingness where teeth and tongue should have been. A strange sound of air being sucked picks up for a second before a shimmering metal rod flies past Barnes’ face and into the gaping mouth, effectively killing the not-so-human man.

“What…the fuck?!” Barnes’ is clearly shaken as he stares at the corpse.

Everyone else is looking to [Y/N] who steps over to retrieve her weapon.

“Leech.” She wipes off the blood on the dead’s pants with a sigh. “Once the soul is completely gone the feeding Leech can choose to either let the corpse die naturally…or they can multiply by inserting a shard of themselves.”

“So…the others?” Rogers might both be referring to the former victims of the Leeches as well as the rest of the family.

“Doubt it,” [Y/N] shrugs, “does not seem to be possible several times in a row…”

There is a soft sound over the com in Loki’s ear and he knows everyone on the team hears it too when Natasha speaks. “Eyes on kids and mother upstairs, left off the stairs.”

“On my way,” the Betan responds before continuing to the three males around her, “get this one on there.” She motions to the couch.

Rather than helping them, Loki hurries after [Y/N].

Upstairs, the sight is differently gruesome with three Avengers’ weapons trained on a girl of maybe six years and her mother who is cradling a baby in her arms – a clearly lifeless child though the woman does not seem to have noticed neither that nor the intruders. In fact, only the little girl appears to be aware of anything. Blond curls, rosy cheeks, dead eyes staring at the strangers.

“You gotta be kiddin’ me,” Stark groans, “it’s the kid?”

“Of course…no one mistrusts a youngling. They can get close enough to feed.” The hollow voice of the Betan does nothing to resolve the tension, and it is possible to see Barton’s bow tremble.

Stark simply powers down the weapons imbedded in the suit’s gloves. “I…I can’t do it.”

“Go downstairs,” Natasha offers, “you too, Clint.”

…

Grim faces on everyone. Gathered in the living room, they have placed the entire family in the couch – three of them with lethal wounds as proof of the closest thing to mercy the Betan could grant. Now she is rummaging through the kitchen while the others try to come to terms with what has happened. Words unspoken, yet most of the Avengers clearly shaken.

“Let’s get outta here,” Stark croaks, “clean-up’s coming to deal with…this.” The half-hearted wave of his hand encompasses the entire situation.

The Betan returns with several bottles of flammable liquids and all the paper around. “No rush…”

She barely gets time to open the cleaning alcohol before the remedies are snatched from her by the Captain. “Not this time.”

“We have to.”

“I said no.”

“But in a mo-“

“No!”

Ignoring the order, [Y/N] tries to bypass him only to be shoved backwards into Loki’s arms that instinctively wrap around her. “Not this time, pet, let them do this the Midgardian way.”

Suddenly, he has to fight to hold her back as a panicked anger takes over her mind. Curses and warnings become garbled as she screams out the frustrations, and the rage only subsides once Loki has managed to drag her outside though the woman does not relax. Eyes trained on the door. Body taught and shivering against his chest.

“It’s okay, pet,” he soothes, “it’s over. You can let go of it.”

“Not yet…not over yet…”

As if to prove her right a gun goes off inside. Once. Twice. Moments later smoke begins to billow, herding out Thor, Stark, Clint, Rogers, Romanoff, and Barnes.

“The…the father…” the metal-suited man explains, “he…woke up? He started moving…”

Flames are licking against the windows now and it is possible to feel the heat already. Finally, with a deep sigh, [Y/N] relaxes against the Asgardian’s chest, allowing the years of stress to be replaced with a bone-deep exhaustion.

She is asleep in his embrace by the time they return.

STATS

Name: Abigail Avalos-Barrera Gender/pronouns: She/her Age: 32 Species: witch Occupation: Journalist / Part Time Healer Faceclaim: Diane Guerrero

HISTORY: 

There exist a strange phenomenon even in this demimonde, a curious occurrence born within the bones of the Avalos-Barrera women. They are each of them powerful creatures for more reasons than one. Magic saturates their blood, envelops flesh and bone weaving itself into all that they are stretching back into the beginning. A multi-generational collection of the extraordinarily gifted, mothers, sisters, and daughters all bound by blood and the title of family. Gifted as they are, as strong and resilient as women, they are incredibly so, what beats inside their chest is a miraculous wonder. That muscle buried in that cavity is what makes these witches who have existed to protect, heal, and act as guardians - that little thing is the source of their humanity. That is what makes those supernatural women even closer to their human cousins in a way few embraces. It adds another level to their already ethereal and otherworldly nature. One cannot help but admire them - wonder about them how curious it is that they could remain as they are even in this day and age. Their matriarch and leader of their coven will tell you that perhaps it is because each generation of their women is stronger than the next capable of facing the rising odds. In broken English with bony and trembling fingers, she will point to one as the living example of this proposed theory. Leticia Avalos will gesture to her great-granddaughter, and when you hear the name Abigail Avalos-Barrera you almost immediately understand how true that statement is. When has there ever existed a soul quite like hers? Leticia will tell you its because Abigail is uniquely designed and capable of facing the day, but Abigail will say to you a slightly altered story. On a handful of accounts, Abigail will agree with Leticia, but the young woman doesn’t credit her magical capabilities or her strength of heart to having been born special. With a soft smile and raise of a sharp brow, Abby will tell you her power comes from the women who raised her. It comes from the people around her and the unique environment in which she was raised. No one is born knowing what sort of person they will be or the level of their respective talents - credit is due to the people who help each person become what they were always meant to be. Had any of the people who contributed to form her ideas of self and the world around her not been a part of her formative years, Abigail, with absolute certainty, wouldn’t be all that she is now. 

That is not to say that Abigail wasn’t something else entirely as a child. Perhaps the reason Leticia believes her great-granddaughter is so special is because of the nature of her birth. Isabella Avalos loved passionately the man she married - soulmates they were, and Abigail’s father was a good man. Good men in New Orleans were very hard to find and, unfortunately, not easy to keep alive or corrupt. Isabella, her mother, and great grandmother have never told the story of how Rafael Barrera died, but the rest of their coven have always spoken highly of him. He died very bravely protecting another family - the sort of man who ran toward the danger - instead of away from it. Isabella was inconsolable, as it would seem until Tia Rosa and her visions spoke of the piece of Rafael still living. ‘You carry a precious piece of the one you love’ Tia Rosa spoke non-nonchalantly ‘I have seen it.’ It was not an easy pregnancy, but if it weren’t for the women who made up her family, who knows what would’ve happened. Thankfully - she was born happy, healthy, and with the strength of generations of women behind her to help raise her into maturity. 

Things would not always go according to plan with as rapidly as Abby would come into her own. Especially the day she stole Cassidy Bolton’s heart. The two of them were small little things barely out of diapers when it happened. From that moment on, it didn’t seem as if there would ever be two more attached individuals in the world. It wasn’t uncommon at all for her family to wonder where she is and inquire next door to find her practicing her skills with Cassidy or sitting up talking about their grand escape to faraway places. There was nothing hidden between them; every plan the two had ever made they shared from college into the wild forever. The young woman was already practically a Bolton; the two were so close, eventually falling into dating at the young age of thirteen. At the time in her heart - Abigail Avalos-Barrera could’ve sworn she couldn’t even imagine life without him. Two years later. A positive pregnancy test would overturn every dream they’d had for each grand adventure they were to take. She was going to be a mother when most girls were having quinceaneras or planning sweet sixteens. Part of her couldn’t help but feel like she was holding them back, but she would never regret creating the most beautiful little boy. Aiden, as she would always come to tell her son, was and will always be the light of her life. 

What two young parents weren’t aware of even if they had some idea of the commitment it would take that his arrival would be the beginning of the division between the two of them. The Avalos-Barrera women and the Bolton family were incredibly supportive before and after Aiden’s appearance but in a toxic combination of their age, sleepless nights, bills, and anything under the sun that could pose a problem Abigail fought tooth and nail with her most beloved. If it was not one issue, it was another, and when Abby pursued college, things came to a disastrous head. To this day, Abigail isn’t sure what spurred her on into another man’s arms. Perhaps it was the heat of the moment, and as emotional, as young mother was, there was no controlling the urge. Maybe it was because he was handsome? Perhaps she saw someone who was there - who wasn’t going to argue with her - who wanted her. No matter her flawed reasoning Abigail slept with another man. An argument for ending all disputes ensued, words were said one could never take back, and Cassidy found out what she had done. Abigail broke her first love’s heart, and to date, it remains the only thing she ever regrets doing. If only she knew what it would do to him. For Aiden’s sake, for the sake of the friendship, they’d always had the couple called it quits and agreed to split custody between the two of them. 

Again while the world would turn on its head, New Orleans would serve eternally as the backdrop for the continuation of Abigail’s story things were different now. The one saving grace of their mutual break was that Cassidy loved her enough to keep her cheating to themselves. As beloved as Abigail always was - this bright shimmering star of incredible potential - he couldn’t ruin her like that. So when Cassidy fell into the ways that would ultimately lead all of them where they were today, Abigail had no right to tell him Riley was no good for him. To say to the man, it was a foolish mistake, but each of them dealt with the death of their romance in different ways. He partied and slept around in a downward spiral of debauchery and drugs. Abigail - Abigail devoted herself to Aiden and tried to breathe life into fractured fairytales and old dreams they’d planned for with his elder brother. 

Always the artist soul, one who never saw the world like others did full of death and despair - kaleidoscope eyes desired to show others they way objects appeared to her. Traveling was out of the question. Aiden needed one parent to be firm and steadfast - she needed to stay the course and be a better person for her son. Abigail, then, began to prove just exactly what she was made of. To show great grandmother correctly that Abby had been made to weather the storm and shine brighter than ever before - respected and admired by almost everyone she met. Who could say they weren’t affected by the young mother’s determination and resilience to forge ahead and how there was always room in her heart to put the needs of others before herself. It didn’t stop Abigail from being flawed, from having human emotions and struggling in her way. No one claimed it would be easy to raise a boy who was just like his father or to pursue journalism and master an ancient craft all at the same time. No one would be able to tell her how many sleepless nights there were to come or the trials and tribulations there were to follow each new day. Tia Rosa’s gift wasn’t all it was cracked up to be anymore, and her predictions for the future were vague and in riddles most days. If not Tia Rosa’s puzzling prophecies, Great Grandmother Leticia’s declining health, or the score of other problems her family and coven encountered, there was still Cassidy. Her first everything and while the dynamic was different, she was still as there as one could be. 

By this time, Aiden was well into being a teenager. He was driving, working, and dating several girls. Abigail was an incomparable healer and talented journalist for one of the major newspapers in the area. Despite ups and downs and fights, she found herself once again to Cassidy’s best friend. Close enough to be a surrogate mother figure to his other children. Abigail was close enough to see him fall in love with Cassandra. Abigail was there to see her first love genuinely fall in love. She’d always had a fondness for humans herself, and Abigail greatly admired the woman - it took a particular sort of person to capture Cass’ heart, and the Avalos-Barrera woman thoroughly approved of her. It stung a little due to her pride, but he wasn’t her love anymore, but he was her family, however forever and always. The other shoe then dropped, and Cassidy nearly died. If not for his mother’s magic, all of them would’ve lost a most irreplaceable being that night. More so than that, Tia Rosa’s visions turned more bizarre full of coming darkness and for the young woman who saw the world so differently - Abigail couldn’t help but believe dangerous times were ahead. Things have calmed now - if only slightly. Abigail expends herself ever consistently to help take care of those she loves and lend assistance where she can to take care of Cassidy’s other children. Part of her has the deepest desire to speak with Cassandra, and the other would love to knock Riley into the next century. It’s not the wisest thing to do - challenging an alpha werewolf or a woman who hasn’t had the most beautiful life experiences, but some days the saint of a woman would like to try. The gifted young witch, the powerful woman strong in heart and mind, grapples with decisions that could again change the world. If danger is on the horizon Abigail is afraid of all she is willing to do to protect the small slivers of peace they hold onto and just what lengths she’d prepared to ensure the safety of her family. A journalist can only wait for the story to break. An amateur photographer can only hold for the perfect shot. Most importantly of all, a gifted witch can only hope her magic is enough or that the draw to darker things isn’t strong enough to pull her from the light when the time comes. Only an Abby can be all these things as great grandmother whispers into the dark that it should be afraid of a strong heart.

PERSONALITY:

+ motherly, perspicacious, resilient, passionate

- opinionated, willful, overly protective, guarded

Abigail is played by Eden

semi charmed life | chapter three | 3.5k | teen|

“You guys have kept in contact this whole time?” Bill asked, brow disappearing underneath hair line as he looked like his old friends in amazement. “And you guys are.. what? Room mates?”

Eddie avoided looking at Richie as he answered. “Yeah, uh… room mates. Something like that.”

[or: the adult!losers reunion, done 2000s sit-com style, just like we all deserve.]

PREVIOUSLY ON SEMI CHARMED LIFE:  “Eddie, sweetheart,” Maggie Tozier laughed happily, patting her starting to winkle hand against Eddie’s soft cheek. “I’ve done this once or twice. You don’t have anything to worry about, sweetie. Go see your friends, have good time.” | A family is so worth it, Beverly. Trust me, you won’t regret it.” | “Baby…” Eddie leaned his head onto Richie’s shoulder. “Fuck whatever they think, we have such a good fucking life. They’re not entitled to know anything about it.” | . Bill sighed and rolled his eyes. “I guess we had a fight, I don’t know. She told me something and I didn’t react the way she wanted me to, so she felt I don’t know if she’s left left or just… I don’t know. She… Audra is pregnant.” | Every face turned to look at Mike, who sighed and rubbed at his face. “I applied to some museum job in New York on a whim earlier this year, but I actually got it. I’m not going to go, my dad needs me here and my job is fine but… I told my partner that I’ve turned it down but I actually haven’t yet. I don’t know why I didn’t, I guess part of it just felt wrong.” | Ben Hanscom stumbled into the diner, out of breath and with mud stains on his jeans. He ran his fingers through his curlier-than-she-remembered hair as his danced through the diner until they landed on her. She watched the way the muscles in his neck hitched, as though he’d momentarily forgotten how to breathe, and she felt her lungs follow his inabilities for just a moment.

The park was surprisingly warm for this May afternoon, Bill Denbrough feeling perfectly comfortable in just his loose-fitting jeans and thin flannel. Children ran all around him, with each other and their parents and the occasional pet. Usually seeing children like this would remind Bill of his own youth, running around with Eddie and Stan and Richie- or even sometimes of a young Georgie. Now, however, it just made him sick to his stomach and triggered a headache. Yet here he was. Watching the kids in the park.

Somebody sat to Bill’s left on the bench seat, and he turned to find Eliina Tozier looking at him in mild amusement. It had taken Bill a second to recognize the girl when she’d checked him in at the reunion- she had, realistically, completely grown up since the last time he’d seen her- but there was no missing that mischievous Tozier charm. “Why are you just sitting in the park staring at kids? Do I need to call the police?”

Bill chuckled. “My girlfriend is pregnant. I’m observing parents in a natural habitat. Because we both seem to agree that I’m going to be an almost terrible father so I’m trying to get a learning curve.”

Elii crinkled her nose. “Not that your creeping in the park isn’t endearing, but why didn’t you just ask Eddie and Richie? I’d never compliment my brother to his face, but he’s done a pretty great job.”

Bill blinked. Opened his mouth then closed it again. Shook his head. “I’m sorry… but they’re doing a great job at what?”

Elii opened her mouth, then closed it again with a smirk.

 →  →  →

“So, you took the job?” Alexander said slowly, hands clasped together on the dining room table.

“No,” Mike said firmly. “I didn’t take it.. not technically. I just never officially turned it down and they’re sort of expecting me to start on Monday.”

Alexander breathed out slowly, twiddling his thumbs together. He pursed his lips, and closed his eyes. “What about your job here? My job here? Your house? Your father? Mike, we can’t just pack up and go to New York on a whim! We don’t have anywhere to live out there!”

“They can set us up with an apartment,” Mike said pleadingly. “My dad should have been set up in a full-time care place a long time ago, we both know that. It kills me but he needs more than we can give him. This job… it’s a great chance for us. To start over, and my dad will have all the care he deserves. We’ll sell the farm and the money can-“

“It’s great opportunity for you,” Alexander interrupted him. “You should have told me that you wanted to take it in the first place. We could have figured out but now you’re just… springing this on me. You think we can get your father into a permanent care facility by Monday? What about Henry? You can’t just take a puppy raised on a farm and stuff him in a New York apartment! It’s not fair!”

“I know,” Mike said slowly, shaking his head. “I meant to turn it but every time I went to I… I just couldn’t. I should have told you, I know. I know. But I think I need to do this. I’ve been stuck in this town my whole life, I gave up school for my dad. This is something I need to do for me, and I want you to come with me. I understand if you can’t, but I’m asking you to come with me because I love you and I want us to do this together.”

Alexander rubbed at his face and sighed softly. “Okay, okay. Let’s try to figure this out.”

  →  →  →

Elii let them into Maggie Tozier’s small little house just off old Neibolt Street, Bill still following behind her in a dazed confusion. The girl gave a shout of greeting and Richie came padding into the front entry. His curls were pulled back from his face in a small ponytail and his white T-shirt seemed to have small purple handprints all over them. He raised his eyebrows.

“You bringing home strays now, El?” Richie asked, shooting a wink in Bill’s direction. “Isn’t this one a little old for you?”

Elii clasped Bill on the shoulder. “Found this little guy all alone in the park, creeping on some poor innocent childrens. Seems to have gotten it into his head that he’s gonna be a bad daddy and that potentially getting arrested for being a park creep is the best way to figure it all out.”

An odd look of understanding settled on Richie’s face as he looked between Bill and his little sister. He sucked his bottom lip into his mouth before letting out a horse-like sound. “Yeah, yeah, okay. Eds is upstairs. But if he tells you to fuck off, then you know what to do.”

Elii saluted and took off up the stairs. Bill hesitated and looked around, utterly confused, before slowing starting up the stairs after her. Elii was leaning against one of the doors, smirking at him, and clicked open the door. Right behind her, he watched Elii skip into the room. Eddie turned around, seemingly holding an arm full of pastel coloured blankets. His hair was left in his natural soft curls, and there seemed to be some sort white mess on the shoulder of his shirt. His face lit up when he noticed Elii.

“I’m here to see the best member of my family,” she sang as she bounced into the room. She pressed a kiss to Eddie’s cheek before leaning down and pulled a face at the blankets in Eddie’s room. “and of course this pretty little princess!”

Bill’s jaw nearly detached from his face when he realized that the bundles of blankets in Eddie’s arms wasn’t simple blankets at all- it was an actual human infant. “I… Eddie, what…”

Eddie’s face jerked up, eyes blown wide. “Bill!” Eddie cried, then coddled the little person close to his chest as they made small whining noises at his loud voice. Eddie hushed the baby, kissing them softly on their head. “It’s okay, baby… Everything’s fine.”

“Is it…” Bill shook his head. “This is your baby? Why didn’t… I am so confused.”

Elii chuckled. She launched back into the story of finding Bill down a the park, Eddie’s amused smile started growing the longer it carried on. He glanced back over at Bill, grinning when Elii finished. “I asked why he didn’t just ask you and Rich, and imagine my surprise when he had no idea what I was talking about.”

Eddie sighed, smiling softly down at his baby. “Leave it, Elii.” He took a few steps towards Bill, rocking the small human. “So, you’re absolutely terrified about being a dad, huh? That’s fair, you know it’s the biggest life change you can make. But, Billy, it’s so worth it. There’s nothing better.” Eddie looked up at Bill, eyes glazing with what could have been happy tears. “This is Martina, given an old lady name specifically so that Richie can call her Marty and make Back to the Future references. She’s five months old, we’ve had her about three and a half.”

Bill leaned in closer and all he could see was small. Small face, small nose, small hands. Just the tiny, small little person that can’t take care of itself, can’t do anything. That needed Eddie, fiercely and for everything. Just months from now, Bill would have his own little small human that needed him. His heart felt like it was going to explode.

“She’ll be sitting up and rolling over by herself soon,” Eddie was still speaking with the soft, sweet, and utterly loving voice. An absolutely devastating love voice, something so pure that Bill almost didn’t recognize his old friend. “She can already sit up by herself for short periods of time, with help from a pillow. It still makes Rich a little nervous, he’d never let her out of his or my arms ever if I’d let him get away with it.”

“Wait, wait,” Bill closed his eyes and shook his head. “I don’t understand. You and Richie just adopted a freaking kid one day?”

Eddie made an odd face. “I mean… it’s a lot longer and more tedious a process than just ‘adopted a freaking kid one day’ but yeah. But most agencies aren’t too keen on un-conventical relationships.” Eddie rolled his eyes and Elii made a dirty look over his shoulder, but Bill sort of thought it was a little understandable that the government didn’t just hand over children to random dudes sharing an apartment in New York. “Marty here was a little bit easier to get all sorted out because we already had Frankie-“

Bill made an odd noise. “Who… is Frankie?”

“You didn’t see her downstairs?” Eddie asked innocently. “She, Maggie and Richie are doing finger paints until Rich needs to go to dinner with his dad. She’s just turned three and she’s got Richie absolutely whipped-“

“Okay, stop, I don’t understand.” Bill rubbed at his temples. “You and Richie adopted two kids? Two actual human children and this never came up? Not the entire time we’ve all been hanging out since showing back up in Derry, discussing our lives? Your two children with your high school best friend didn’t seem like might be relevant to those conversations?”

“That’s what I was thinking,” Elii said from where she was pressed beside Eddie, letting Marty grab her fingers in her tiny baby hands. Eddie hushed her.

“Richie and I discussed it at lengths,” Eddie said. “We thought it would be best to keep it private, since we didn’t know how any of you would react.”

Bill nodded slowly, chuckling. “Well… I imagine your and Rich’s dating lives are pretty dead with these two sharing your apartment. Don’t you get sick of only having each other around?”

Eddie and Elii glanced at each other in mutual looks of disbelief.

 →  →  →

Ben Hanscom pulled his rental car over to the side of the road, and pressed his forehead against the steering wheel. When he glanced up and looked at the WELCOME TO DERRY sign that was taunting him. The car dealership in Portland, Maine had a partner branch in New York where he’d planned to return the car once he got home, but his brain seemed to have other plans and found himself driving back to Derry. It was amazing the hold of a town he hadn’t thought of in near-on a decade had on him.

Or maybe it wasn’t the town, Ben thought to himself as he looked over to the passenger seat at his Motorola cell phone. Beverly had personally placed her direct line in the hotel room she was staying in as they’d parted ways at the reunion last night. He’d opened the contact seven times since then, but had yet to make the call.

Taking the phone, he pressed call before he could talk himself out of it. It rang once, twice, three times before Beverly’s voice came to him. “Hello?”

“You know the funniest thing just happened to me,” Ben said, smiling to himself. “I paid for a taxi from here to Portland and rented myself a car. Was gonna head back to New York tonight and then I found myself staring at the Derry town sign. What do you make of that?”

Beverly hummed on the other line. “I don’t know, Benny. You’re the one who’s supposed to be good at symbolism, not me.”

“I think you’re mixing me up with Bill,” Ben chuckled. “He’s the writer.”

“You’ve got a heart of a poet, my dear Ben,” Beverly said. “Always have.”

Ben bit back a smile. Your hair is winter fire. January embers. My heart burns there too. He never knew if Beverly figured out that letter had been from him, all those years ago, but he’d never really tried to hide his poetic side the older they got. “Maybe. But I still couldn’t tell you what I’m doing back here.”

“Well…” Beverly hummed on the other side of the line. “Even if you don’t know you’re here, if you plan on staying I won’t be doing anything and this hotel room is surprisingly nice for downtown Derry. And I’ve got wine.”

“Can’t say I’m much of a wine drinker,” Ben laughed.

“I’ve also got whiskey.”

“Sold. See you in ten.”

 →  →  →

Richie ducked into the room, with a small giggling girl wearing pigtails on his shoulders. Her legs swung out as Richie moved, kicking him in the chest on the backswing, but he didn’t seem bothered in the slightest. “How are things going in here- Ah.”

Elii had dropped herself onto the bed, but Eddie and Bill were both still standing awkwardly in the middle of the room with Marty in Eddie’s arms. Bill eyed the little girl on Richie’s shoulders as though she was going to morph into some sort of monster and swallow him whole. Richie backed up to the bed and let Frankie drop off his shoulders onto the mattress. The girl immediately crawled over to her aunt and mimicked how Elii was laying.

Eddie smiled softly at his girl before turning to Bill. He stepped closer with the small bundle in his arms. “Come on, you can hold her.”

Bill cleared his throat awkwardly. “Yeah, no, that’s uh- that’s okay. I’ll just watch from over here.”

“Dude, come on,” Richie rolled his eyes. He’d changed out his paint splattered clothes into a nice clean shirt and pressed jeans. “I have a dinner with Went in like… fifteen minutes. I’m not leaving here until you grow a pair of balls and hold my freaking baby.”

“Watch your words,” Eddie said softly, moving closer to Bill but eyeing Richie carefully.

“Wash your words,” Frankie called from the bed in a matching tone, not looking up from the stuffed toy she was dancing in Elii’s face. Eddie and Richie both beamed at the little girl before turning their attention back to Bill.

“I….” Bill stuttered. “I don’t know how to hold a baby.”

“Like a football,” Richie told him with a shrug. Eddie glared at him as a nervous Bill accepted the sleeping Marty. Just to promptly start to tuck the baby under his arm.

“NO!” Eddie, Richie and Elii all shouted in unison. Frankie’s eyes went wide as she looked around the room, Bill startled and released little Marty. Richie took a mad leap forward, catching the cooing child and dropping to sit crossed legged on the ground. He pulled Marty to his chest and rocked her. Eddie had his hands pressed over his mouth, and Elii and Frankie were staring up at him with looks of surprise.

“Dude…” Richie said, shaking his head and letting out a nervous laugh. “You’re so fucked.”

 →  →  →

Ben walked up to the outside door of Beverly’s apartment and knocked once. Beverly pulled the door open immediately, red hair tied up messily on the top of her head while rocking an oversized Bates College and flannel pajamas. Her feet were tucked into fuzzy bunny slippers straight out of the 1980s. She was as beautiful as she had ever been.

She beamed at him, moving forward to throw her arms around his shoulders. She still smelled like vanilla extract and Marlboros, even after all these years. “I’m so glad you came back, I feel like I barely even saw you my whole trip!”

“Well…” Ben snickered, leaning back and grinning at her. “You and Richie did disappear not even half an hour into the night and came back completely sloshed.”

Beverly shrugged, smiling up towards him. “What can I say? It’s me and Rich.”

“Rekindling the old flame?” Ben asked as Beverly ushered him into her hotel room. She was right about it being nice. It was no big city 5-star suite, but it was clean and the bed was large and it was heated. That was already more than Ben would have expected from some downtown Derry motel.

“Hardly,” Beverly scoffed, grabbing the bottle of amber liquid and two plastic cups from the beside table and sitting down. She patted beside her on the bed and Ben sat down. “I think uh…” Beverly poured out the liquid and waggled her brows at Ben. “I think he’s married.”

“Huh.” Ben said, accepting the extra cup from Beverly. He thought back to what he’d seen on Rich’s Facebook page, the implication of a long-term relationship. “You know that actually makes sense.” Beverly took a long sip of the drink, eyeing Ben over the rim of the cup. “When Mike got in contact with us all, I looked up Rich on the Facebook. He doesn’t get too deep into life, it’s mostly about his work, but there is some stuff that made me think he was in some sort of serious relationship.”

Beverly leaned back against the pillows and dropped her feet into Ben’s lap. It had been years since they’d sat like this together, but they fell back into the position like riding a bike. She smiled up at him. “Enough about Tozier and his secrets. Tell me about yours.”

Ben drank deeply and then sighed. “My life is actually pretty boring, Bev. Crap apartment in the scuds of New York, working myself half to death just for the chance to get my dream. And before you ask- no. There’s nobody special. Don’t really have time for dating these days.”

Beverly smiled at him. “You never did give yourself enough credit, Benny. We’re still young, I bet you’ll be raising the skyline of Manhattan with buildings soon enough.”

“Thanks, Bev,” Ben smiled bashfully, scratching behind his ear. “But you… you’re married, huh? What’s that like?”

Beverly rolled her eyes. “You know what I said to Richie last night- you know, before we were too drunk for our words to not matter anymore? That he was the only good guy I’ve ever dated… and I was only fucking fifteen. Tom he’s…. he’s not a bad guy, he’s not. I’ve just been thinking that maybe we’re not the best match. I don’t know how I didn’t see it before.”

Ben nodded, pursing his lips. “Are you leaving him?”

Beverly shrugged one shoulder, taking in the rest of her drink and Ben followed suit. “I don’t know. Rich offered me to stay with him if I decide to.”

“Living with Eddie and Richie?” Ben chuckled. “Sounds like a riot.”

Beverly beamed. “I think it sounds amazing. I just can’t believe they kept in contact this whole time. It’s wild, nobody else did.”

“Some people had their reasons,” Ben said airily and Beverly nodded as she refilled their cups. “I mean, you saw Richie and Stan last night. Not that I can really blame Rich.”

Beverly nodded, knocking back half her drink. “It was a shitty thing… but it was a shitty thing ten years ago. Sometimes you need to let things go to heal from them.”

“Let’s all speak from experience there,” Ben chuckled darkly. He and Beverly both lifted their plastic cups and clinked them together.

“Enough of this,” Beverly chugged back the rest of her drink and adjusted to sit crossed legged in front of Ben. Watching Beverly finish her drink pulled at something deep in Ben’s subconscious, and he took his whole cup in one gulp. Beverly raised her brow, undeniably impressed. “You a big drinker, Mr Hanscom?”

Ben chuckled. “I can out drink even the best of men, Miss Marsh.”

A small, bashful smile across her face at Ben’s use of her maiden name. Maybe she’d grown up ready to escape that name, tied of being connected to her father, but hearing it brought a small thrill to her chest. Whether the name itself- or the person who was using it- Beverly didn’t really know.

Her head was swimming from drinking so quickly- and the two glasses of wine she’d had before Ben had called her- and she knew she wasn’t exactly thinking straight. “I had a crush on you in high school, did I ever tell you that?”

Ben’s eyes went wide. “I.. what?”

“Yeah,” Beverly chuckled drunkenly. “After Richie and I broke up, I was so confused, I.. didn’t know what happened. One day things were fine, the next they were just… over. And you… were so supportive through the whole thing but I… I chalked up my feelings for you to a rebound. Because I sad about Rich and you were there for me.”

Ben’s eyes danced from one of Beverly’s eyes to the other, heart racing and entire body filled with a strong unsure feeling. It was words he’d imagined- he’d dreamed- for years as an adolescent, but they never came from a drunk Beverly Marsh. A drunk, married Beverly Marsh.

“Ben, I-“ Beverly swayed forward, pressing a hand to Ben’s cheek and exhaled hardly. “I….��m gonna puke."

She barely managed to grab the waste basket before throwing up, Ben laughing and pulling back her hair.

Yugioh S3 Ep 11 pt 2: Seto Discovers Vulture Capitalism

Where were we on this arc that ended up being hella longer than I thought it would be? Oh yeah, Last we left the crew, Tristan’s body, now possessed by Nezbitt, was just racing away with Mokuba. This kid gets abducted so often, it’s never occurred to me that anyone in this show would think this is weird. So, when Noah showed up to intervene with actual common sense it was a good bit of whiplash for me.

It’s like the same whiplash I got back when Noah attempted to forfeit a rigged game (for the first time in this entire series). Like I get that Noah is the villain, but how is the evil kid way better at this common sense thing than...a lot of people who’ve been on this show? Not that Noah’s always smart, of course, he still doesn’t seem totally with it on a lot of things (like interior design, which we will get to in a sec) but wow. Noah actually called out this entire show with “Really? Mokuba? Again?”

And so you know what that means? We get to see Noah’s sweet pad in this VR world where Noah could have created anything. Literally anything. To start, he made himself a fireplace with a tiny tiny stack of wood (pretty sure Noah might not know how fires work) and...some sort of...curse on the mantle.

Maybe the mantle couldn’t read the typeface that Noah wanted to use on the mantle?

The rest of the room is just this. Just this.

You know what this no-walls aesthetic SUPER reminds me of?

Pocket Camp. Like this just looks like a Pocket Camp set up to me. In fact...I’m pretty sure I can make almost this exact room in Pocket Camp.

Noah’s just inviting Mokuba over with the bare minimum of ugly ass furniture he needs to have a person over at his campsite he pretends is a house while he waits patiently for the real version of Animal Crossing to come to Switch.

Leichter has an accent that is very old-fashioned Americana and doesn’t wholly make sense in the context of him living in urban Japan, like there’s a whole story there I’d be curious about. But most likely, they were probably trying to cover up the fact that they were using the same 5 voice actors by having him pull out the Clark Gable impression.

And then Seto did not use a Blue Eyes as his deck Master. Instead he used....this guy.

This is a lot of guy to take in. I...I don’t like it.

During this duel we get a Seto Kaiba flashback--and it’s an honest flashback this time, no clones are going to show up and reenact this performance, this is just a straight up flashback.

We’re transported back to Gozoboro’s long buffet table. He really, really loves this thing. It’s like the only place he and his kids ever seem to hang out. Surprised Mokuba and Seto don’t need glasses after squinting so hard to see their own Father for so many years. Also surprised Mokuba and Seto even know what their Dad looks like up close.

Anyways, he sits down at the table and shouts really loudly so it can reach the other side of the room.

Also, just gonna bring this up, we’ve only seen one other guy obsessed with long tables--let me do some digging to a S1 cap, one sec:

Maybe this is just what evil Dads who wear Salmon do?  They get hella long tables to seat their 0 friends and just sit at one of the ends and monologue until something important happens. I mean y’all know how much I love this storyboarder but boy they have a thing for villains and long tables.

Anyways, back to Season 3.

(bro’s telling me he does not know about Thoroughly Modern Millie and like can you believe neither Hulu or Netflix has that musical? I mean that musical is problematic as hell, as is all Broadway but maybe I want to watch some 1920′s dancing.)

Anyways, cue Gozaboro shuffling in a comedically large pile of money on a very small pushcart. About 1,099,520,000.00 Yen’s worth. But the show will simplify it for the Americans.

This episode of Yugioh was made around 2002, and this just followed the .com bubble bursting in California. (and before that happened, it was preceded by a recession in Japan that affected the .com bubble quite a bit) For those here who were not born yet and do not remember this happening, this was like, pretty horrifying. I grew up in the Bay where 90% of everyone still works in tech, so I remember that after the bubble burst there were kids in our school who’s parents used to have great salaries and a steady income, who suddenly had to pick up shifts at Starbucks to get back on their feet.

So, it’s interesting that we have this kid’s show basically showing us point blank what Vulture Capitalism is and how it works. You’d think this business stuff would normally go over kid’s heads, but at the time, I think a lot of kids wanted to know what happened to their families but maybe didn’t understand it?

So Kaiba is gonna get into investing all of a sudden, which is kind of weird, mostly because it involved no playing cards. Also because this happened:

Yeah, what? He’s apparently not even adopted yet, which means Seto could still turn around and tell the News that he beat Gozaboro in a match but, I guess that old threat has aged out.

It’s inferred that Seto’s been living here like for several years now. You’d think this guy would list some dependents just for the tax cuts, but nah, Gozaboro just shoved these two into the gigantic 5000 sq ft closet under the stairs of his huge mansion and forgot about them for a couple years.

So, armed with money that is printed on single Yen bills and being pushed around Kaiba in a little tiny cart, Seto has to formulate a plan. Problem is, his business skills include a.) beating up other orphans b.) doing math pretty good and c.) playing cards.

When Seto is like “I don’t care what the company sells, just get me a company to buy” that’s like a straight reference to the .com bubble, but minus the complicated stock market stuff.

For the kid’s in the room that don’t know a thing about this era, tech companies were being created en masse, and because the internet was new and exciting, all of their worth was in their stock rather than in their products--if they even had a product. Mostly they just had big overreaching ideas they were pretty sure would make them all millionaires. But the product didn’t really matter since no one ever reads any numbers when all they plan to do is turn around and immediately sell anyway. They just assumed that if they put on the pressure, they would drive up the value, and would sell before anyone figured out it was all worthless.

This actually worked for so many years, up until people at the top all started demanding real money from the people at the bottom, much like how Seto needed 100 million dollars ASAP from an unsuspecting...whatever company this was. Vulture Capitalism at it’s finest, expecting exponential and unrealistic growth from any company, and if, the growth isn’t met, just selling the whole damn thing after driving every employee to the hospital for overwork.

Now, normally Vulture Capitalism is only if an investor buys a struggling company intending to sell directly afterwards, but since Seto made them struggle like immediately after purchasing, I think we can still call this that.

(And we still do this to this day, PS, we’ve learned nothing from the .com crash.)

This really bad child’s outfit is my favorite Mokuba outfit. I mean...it’s so bad. No wonder Mokuba was picked on so often as a child, wow. He’s like a late-80′s news anchor.

Also, I have NO idea how Seto got any money back so quickly. That doesn’t...totally make sense. But, this is a kid’s show and we have to simplify this whole thing into a sensible package. I mean there’s way more to the whole  .com problem but...this show wasn’t literally doing a .com...just a really heavy reference to it.

And much like how people valued stock more than what companies actually were, Seto’s value was a lot of the same. His worth to his Father wasn’t that of a son, it was entirely held up in potential dollar signs. To Gozaboro, Seto's nothing more than a small company he’ll extort straight into...a more emotional type of bankruptcy. Framed alongside the .com crash, this is sort of like, ah, I see what you’re doing, Yugioh. The way Seto was screwing this company was the same way he was already screwed. It’s basically all he knows, and it is a lot of heavy handed foreshadowing.

Anyway, Seto destroyed a company with 10 mill, which is nothing compared to the amount of money vulture capitalists toss around nowadays.

The Big 5 may have honestly done a better job raising Kaiba than Gozoburo since this guy acted as an advisor rather than a boss, but it’s a very, very low bar these boys have set and so far, very few adults have met it. All you have to do is just try and not kill them and you’re already better than all of Kaiba’s father figures.

With the exception of Roland, of course. Youknow, other than Grandpa, Roland is like the only good Dad on this show. Never thought Roland would look like such a shining star. Man, Roland better not screw everyone over or I will be so disappointed in him.

Anyways, the Yugi crew found a fully fueled truck from Soviet Era Russia buried in one of those warehouses.

They censor so much stuff that gives away that Yugioh is from another country, and they kept in the 3-wheeler pickup? As if any North American child would have any idea what they’re looking at right now? Maybe they just assumed we’d think it was sci-fi?

Also, then this happened?

...OK then.

Not sure how Satellite Laser works outside the context of VR. But, at least here in the VR Zone, we can send a Satellite Laser into space because...Space exists here? In VR?

This world is weirdly very small but also very big at the same time. It’s like Katamari.

Anyway, that’s all for this episode, next episode we find out if Kaiba will hack a laser for the second time in this series. Also we find out if Joey can jump a sonic-the-hedgehog broken highway with a 3-wheeled European-as-hell Pickup Truck.

Also...close enough?

Pocket camp really needs more yellow sleeveless puff jackets.

And here’s a link to read the recaps in Chrono order from Ep1 S1

Blue Light - Angst: Johnny and Lucas x Reader

Word Count: 7.1k

Warnings: Mentions of blood, mentions of recreational drug use, vulgar language in some places.

Summary: You, Johnny and Lucas are childhood best friends, but Lucas has a secret he’s been keeping for a long time - he loves you. What happens when he sees something that pushes him over the edge leaves you all in awe.

You could of only been five, if not younger, the first time you realised how beautiful the colour blue was. Even now, you could remember that smile wiped across your face as you stared at the Christmas lights that shone white and blue littering your family Christmas tree, of which you had helped decorate, with blue ornaments to match. 

Christmas was already your all-time favourite holiday, and always had been - after all, your parents did make it incredibly special every year, stacking presents far above how high you stood at that age. For some strange reason, the colour resonated with you from that one year on. Blue was known to usually represent coldness and harshness, and many of your future friends would always be surprised, or better yet tease you about how you could love such a colour, but to you, it represented life, growth and change and you always had something blue close to you, whether it was a keychain, a scarf, a notebook, or anything else.

Maybe it was pure coincidence that every single major event in your life leading up to that point, and past that point included blue, but you liked to think it was the universes way of reminding you that things happened for a reason, and that moments like that were destined to happen no matter what.

Then there were your two best friends since before you could even babble, Lucas and Johnny. The two boys that you were destined to play with and bond with since before you were born, curtesy of your parents and theirs planning their children's lives out to the minute. They thought your obsession with the colour was strange, and would relentlessly joke and tease about it for the years you all spent together. In fact, at one point they referred to you as 'Jack Frost's long lost sister' for a whole week just to get on your nerves.

Of course, you didn't mind this teasing so much, since you knew that they were just joking around and didn't really think all the things they said. If anything, you were glad you met the two kindest and most loving non-familial people in your life who made no jokes off-limits.

The past was a fickle thing, with the memories of petty arguments, falls, cuts and scrapes fresh in all three of your minds, as well as the memories of you and your two favourite boys playing with toys, and wandering the expanse of your seemingly infinite backyard, and laughing at Johnny as he cried about his favourite toy breaking.

They were the boys you built sandcastles with when you were all less than a foot high, and the boys you spent hours and hours constructing lego houses with, of which one of you would usually accidentally knock over and break, or in Lucas' case, knock them over deliberately to get a reaction.

You would always love them, and would always cherish the years you spent growing alongside them both, watching them turn into the men they were today. You could very clearly remember the way that the two boys would follow you everywhere as toddlers, almost like lost puppies, sulking if you didn't pay them any attention. It was a far cry from the way that you watched them become their own people, making friends and falling in love with girls who were incredibly lucky to gain such caring people in their lives... Well, not so much Lucas, but Johnny sure played the field. 

Hair pulling, playfighting in the sand, grass and snow, with a plethora of inside jokes that you all still laughed about to this day were the basis of your childhood, spending every waking moment with them both.

But there was one thing you didn't know about them. At the age of seven; at your seventh birthday in fact, in the cupboard under your stairs, holding nothing but a torch and a bible, they pinky-promised and swore on the bible itself, that neither one of them would fall in love with you, or do any of the "icky" stuff that "grown-ups" did like hold hands and kiss. Despite the fact that they were young, they both seemed entirely sure that they wanted to do anything to preserve your friendships, and that nothing, not even 'love' would get in the way of that.

"This is serious Luc!" Johnny shouted, deliberately shining the battery-powered handheld torch they had stolen into Lucas' eyes without warning, seeing the boy squirm and cover his eyes urgently as he begged Johnny to point it somewhere else.

"Okay okay Johnny, I swear, on all of my toys, all of my comic books, and my favourite socks, that I will never fall in love with Y/N" Lucas finally conceded, finally having his vision freed as Johnny flipped the switch on the torch to turn it off.

"See, That wasn't so hard was it? And I promise on my Nintendo Wii, all my Transformers figures, my racecar bedsheets, and this very torch that I will never fall in love with Y/N, and will NEVER even think about any icky stuff.."

The funniest part was, neither Lucas OR Johnny even really understood love and the way it felt to be in love because they were simply too young, but that day they made a promise that to them, was the world.

But there your best friend, Lucas stood, from a distance at the Winter Dance longingly staring at you, losing all courage he may or may not of had when he got there, once he saw you. 

That particular evening you were wearing a rose-gold gown, and had decided to have your hair pinned back into a fishtail braid that was right in the middle of being completely and utterly flawless, and a complete mess. 

Lucas just put this down to the fact that you hadn't put enough hairspray in before you left, knowing from all the times you did his hair before he went somewhere, or doing his hair for fun that you never put enough on. He knew that you had a tendency to underestimate things on your life quite often, but he'd never tell you. He was too nice to say something that could potentially hurt your feelings. 

Lucas immediately noticed the overhead and subtle tint of the blue overhead-lights drenching you in baby blue, like an angel beneath the ocean. He truly couldn't take his eyes off of you, almost like they were glued to you, with the strongest of adhesives.

In that moment, he could of sworn that you were really just that, an angel, The way every single part of you was so heavenly, both to him, and to anyone that had eyes had him feeling as if his jaw would snap right off if he didn't have just the tiniest of composure left in him. He was stunned how even in possibly the worst type of lighting possible in Lucas' opinion, you still managed to be flawless. But that was it; even though he always made fun of your love for blue in recent years, he truly could barely catch his breath in the pure pride and overwhelming love at how it complimented you. He could never deny that you looked gorgeous under blue lighting, even if he hated it with a passion. Gulping and his face flushed a deep red as he fiddled with his cuffs anxiously, he couldn't even grasp enough of his own attention span at once to know what was happening around him.

To him, the rest of the people in the room may as well of not been there. All he could focus on was you, and only you. Nobody else existed in that moment, and nobody else mattered. 

Lucas had been irreparably in love with you since the day of your twelfth birthday. Until that day, he had seen you as his best friend, and nothing more, and had always looked up to you as an older-sister figure, even though you were the same age. But something that day, changed. 

The moment was still crystal clear in his memory, but he couldn't quite put his finger on what drew him to you. He liked to think that it was a mix of your intoxicating smile when you blew out the candles on your cake, and the unfiltered and joyous laughter you let out when you saw what him and Johnny had spent 4 months saving their allowances combined for; and how you ran to them and hugged them ever so tightly that they almost thought you'd crush them into tiny pieces. He could never forget the way you were so mature and level-headed when on the same night as your party, you found out that your parents were separating, and sat on the stairs listening to them argue, as they told each other how much they couldn't wait to be rid of each other. 

He never let on that he did, but he knew that while Johnny and him kept everyone entertained in the living room and put the volume of the stereo slightly higher than the shouting upstairs, you held yourself and sobbed your heart out while leant up against the wall, and prayed that nobody could hear you. He heard every single sound of distress, every sniffle, every attempt to compose yourself and pretend your world wasn't crumbling and that broke his heart to hear, but he knew that him telling you he did would only cause you more embarrassment than it was worth. 

One thing he never knew, was how you smiled to yourself once you finally managed to stop crying, thanking whatever higher power there was that you had the most attentive best friends, and that you cried yourself to sleep that night after you had left your party early and asked him and Johnny to clean up for you.

Ever since that day, he had contemplated telling you how he felt many times, and had almost let his best kept secret slip many times before. Whether it was because of alcohol, overwhelming pride in your best moments, extreme loneliness, or pure desperation for the seemingly never ending simultaneous heartache and love he felt when he was near you, he always found himself stopping the words as they hung on the tip of his tongue.

He watched you date boy after boy, sitting through endless rom-coms on Saturday nights with pint after pint of ice-cream, while you would cry into his chest about how you "always attracted the worst people" and how your heart ached so much you could barely move, let alone imagine an end to it. In those moments, he was always wondering if maybe one day he would be able to tell you that he was the one you should of been dating that entire time.

Through award ceremonies in middle school where you got countless awards and words of praise, he sat with Johnny and your families, forcing himself to not saying anything other than how proud he was of you for working hard and it paying off, and how he knew you'd do well. 

When you were your lowest, he was the first one to call or text, and would be at your house in a flash to let you get all your sadness, frustration and pain out, whether that was through ranting and venting, or complete silence shared over him cradling you in his arms as you cried into chest, the warm tears quickly soaking into his shirt, and his fingers in your hair as he played with it reassuringly. 

He was even there for your first kiss, setting up a date between the boy you liked when you were 14, because he couldn't bear the thought of you spending Valentines Day alone like he would. He was standing in the next room, listening through the thin walls as you professed your love for the boy, and placed a juvenile and innocent kiss onto his lips. Although he fought back tears as he heard every second and spent the next week having nightmares about it, he stayed by your side and dared not say anything about his love for you.

Even now, seeing Johnny, his best friend and yours walk up to you and get so close to you that he could of sworn that his heart would of beat out of his chest, he said nothing. If anything, he almost felt even worse about the way he thought of you, and how much he wanted nothing more than you to be together.

This ballsy move from Johnny wasn't exactly shocking. Lucas had known that his best friend and the brother he never had but always wanted, had always had a thing for you, and always would. He knew from the moment that he even suggested the pinky-promise you had both made, that he wanted you all to himself. The jealousy that he felt did subside after some time, but in the back of his head; he always knew that Johnny felt something for you.

Seeing him brush his hand up against your shoulder as he asked you to dance and whispered in your ear was torture. He squirmed uncomfortably watching the sight, as he could barely hold back the single tear that carelessly fell down onto his shirt.

"Lucas?" a small and fragile voice called from behind you.

Seung; a shy girl, and the subject of few conversations. A seemingly boring girl, and a girl Lucas knew little about, and cared little about. 

Rumour had it, that she was obsessed with him and had been crushing on him since the first year of high school. Of course, he was far too busy thinking about you, and spending time with you to care about that, dropping the occasional hint that he wasn't looking for a relationship in the hopes she'd scurry off and find someone else to bother.

"Hm Seung? What is it?" he replied, the disinterest and distraction in his tone unmistakable, as he couldn't even make basic eye contact with her.

"I was wondering if you'd like to dance?" she asked.

For a moment, Lucas broke the gaze he had on you, and snapped to her. He looked into her eyes deeply, his mind full of guilt at how this girl hadn't taken the obvious hints he had given that he wasn't interested, and how she must of thought that she was even an option with you around him.

But there the problem was. You hadn't taken any of his hints either. Lucas felt like screaming right then and there, the amount of times he had desperately tried to hint at the fact he liked you, and you would shrug or laugh it off as part of your two's jokes. Instead of wanting to go over to you, Lucas' brain was rushing with the idea of dancing with Seung, just to try and make you even slightly jealous.

Who cares anymore? he thought to himself.

"You know what, Seung? I would be honoured." he replied, between almost gritted teeth.

This was wrong, so so wrong for him. He couldn't believe he was really willing to go to these lengths to make you notice him, or that he was insane enough to even think of such a sly tactic. In just a few seconds, he went from standing inches from her, to holding one of his hands around her waist, and holding her right hand with his left one, beaming down at her falsely as she perched her head on his left shoulder, and they swayed from side to side to the ambience of the unbearably slow music your high school had chosen.

Even when he was supposed to be trying to make you jealous, Lucas couldn't help but lose focus on Seung, not that he had much anyway, to stare over at you. 

She's... She's dancing with him. his mind repeated over and over, like a mantra.

"Lucas? I'm, really really glad that I decided to come to the dance." Seung said, her voice slightly muffled by the material of his suit against her mouth.

"And why would that be?" he quizzed, fake intrigue and a drip of malice following his tone closely. Truth be told, he didn't really care what Seung had to say, let alone her intentions, because all that met his gaze was the sight of you and Johnny swaying, dangerously close to one another and your lips inches apart, as he watched them crash against one another, into a kiss that Lucas could only dream of ever giving you. If it wasn't for the fact that he was used to feeling this way, and longing for you, he would of surely lost his mind, if not before, then now.

He watched closely as Johnny mouthed the words "I love you" and interlocked his fingers with yours, his heart breaking with every syllable uttered, as you got on tiptoes to whisper into his ear that you loved him too. It was almost in slow motion to Lucas, as he watched the one chance, even if it was tiny, of being able to make you his, disappear into thin air. It was almost as if the past five years of him devoting himself to a partnership that existed in nowhere but his mind and heart, were for absolutely nothing.

In the moment, Lucas didn't know what to do. Would he run? Would he fall to the ground onto his knees and weep? Or would he simply die then and there?

Only a handful of people even noticed this, including you and Johnny. Looking up for just a second at him, Johnny gripped your hand and pushed the stray hairs that stuck to your forehead, behind your ear.

"Johnny, what's wrong with Lucas?" you questioned, the concern in your tone making it seem as if you had half a mind to go after him.

"You know Lucas, probably just something and nothing. He's been all over the place lately Y/N, we'll go and see him later on." Johnny remarked, trying to calm you down as the empathetic side of you was evident in your movement and facial expression.

"But what if it IS something important? He's our best friend, we can't just leave him on his own." you argued, trying to break free from Johnny to go after him.

"Y/N, please don't let it ruin our night. Lucas is most likely fine, and I'm sure he can wait. He'll understand... I promise." he stated confidently, with a soothing tone that made you completely trust the words he said.

Now running across the school field, Lucas' shoes were thick with mud and wet grass, as he barely even stumbled, going to the first place he could think of; the park.

This was no ordinary park, oh no - it was a monumental place in your history with both him and Johnny. It was the first place you were all allowed to take your bikes and ride around without supervision, the place your families would meet at to go on the occasional walk, and would talk about the mundane goings-on of that particularly week or month.

In later years, it was your three's go-to hangout spot after school finished, the small abandoned building oddly placed in the very centre of the entire park, it was the place you often went. 

Nights with sleeping bags and snacks were spent there, when you naively thought you could all last the whole night in the building, but ended up going home after you all realised that the sleeping bags and jackets you brought with you wouldn't shield you from the elements. You never did learn the first time, so several attempts were made to no avail.

In recent years, as far back as the age of fifteen and sixteen, it housed you during the week that you all decided to run away from home to protest against your parents rules, where Lucas had somehow managed to get a pack of cigarettes for you to smoke together, and Johnny being Johnny, had brought a bottle of vodka. That night, you all had your first drag of a cigarette, and the first taste of alcohol, of which none of you enjoyed even slightly. You were coughing and spluttering, and idiotically thought vodka would help, gulping it down like it was going out of fashion. When it didn't - you all really wished you could just go home.

Of course, the pack of cigarettes were discarded after one drag of one of them, leaving seventeen untouched, becoming completely soaked by the dripping water coming through the hole in the roof none of you could ever quite patch up. As for the bottle of vodka - Johnny poured it away and smashed the bottle, using a blowtorch to mold it into a makeshift weapon of some kind - one that his mother would find in his bedroom the next morning and would throw away, scolding him for his stupidity to drink, and attempting to use molded glass as a weapon.

Lucas now lazily perched himself on the worn-down granite stairs leading to it. So much had changed in just a year. 365 days felt like a lifetime for him, not seeing you as much, drifting from Johnny just a little bit. Despite how it had only been barely a year since such great times started to become less frequent, he felt as if the bitterness he now felt, had been building up for far longer than just a year.

Nothing after that Valentines day three years ago had felt the same. Yes, he felt the same about you, and if anything, that day made him feel so much more determined to finally tell you how he felt, but he could never get it out of his head.

It was that day that he realised that his tendency to put himself in the way of heartache and pain would ultimately either be the death of him, or would finally force him to put-up or shut-up. Sitting there, one year older, he somehow felt a thousand times more bitter and cynical.

Why her? he thought to himself.

Anger welling up inside of him, Lucas let out his frustration and pain out on the nearest thing to him, the wall of the building he had once had considered his favourite place. Standing up now, his fists met with the structure, making not a single dent or impact on it. His fists were a different story, the knuckles now grazed, bleeding and an angry shade of red that only made him want to keep punching until there was nothing left. 

It didn't matter to him that he was now just throwing punch after punch just to make himself bleed. It didn't matter if you would ever finally notice how much he loved you. He simply didn't care anymore, and at that point, he could of died on the spot and he would of been grateful for it.

"I fucking hate you!"

He slammed his fist through a sharp piece of metal holding the barely-standing building together, cutting his hand open, the blood covering his entire hand and part of his arm.

He didn't flinch, but kept on punching until he finally felt like he couldn't make things any worse for himself. Blood was now drenching the bottom portion of his arm, his suit-jacket wet with it, and the small glimpse of his white shirt poking through was also stained red.

"I hate you for making me love you so much.."

Lucas now fell with his back up against the wall, the minimalist amount of tears threatening to spill from his fragile being. Clenching his arm as the pain finally set in, and the reality that he was now alone with a very deep wound and nobody for miles, he choked back the tears, and ripped part of his pants at the very bottom, using it as a tourniquet to stop blood flow to the area and keep himself from either passing out or bleeding to death.

Lucas wasn't sure if in that moment his overactive imagination that often got him in trouble was just playing with his emotions and vulnerable state, or if all that blood loss was doing more than just making him slightly light-headed, but he could of sworn that he saw you in the distance. 

She came. She didn't leave me after all. he thought, and mostly importantly - he hoped.

Words becoming slurred, and vision blurring with every second passing, he fainted. 

But Lucas didn't wake up in an ambulance, at home or with you by his side. Instead, he woke up alone, freezing, terrified and confused. The bleeding had thankfully stopped, but he was dishevelled and drained, and he could barely drag himself far enough on his weak and exhausted legs to reach his house where he knew he would be safe.

His mother really didn't take too kindly to finding out after the commotion of seeing her son in such a state, that you and Johnny hadn't gone after him.

Upon finding out the next morning, you were shocked to say the least. Sitting at your desk in class right next to Johnny, a voice message and a text both from his mother. You had put off listening to it until after the first class you had that day because you had the horrible feeling she was going to tell you something terrible, that your best friend of seventeen years had injured himself, or worse; killed himself.

You knew that you should of gone after him or at least sent his mother even just a text to let her know he was vulnerable and upset, or that he'd left the dance. Your heart dropped when you heard the words come through the phone speaker.

"He's bruised, sore, and very weak. He's lucky he didn't rupture a blood vessel or worse.. But he's in the right hands, safe hands. He wanted to stop me from calling so you didn't worry but you guys are so close I know you'd want to know.. Anyway Y/N, I just want you to know that he's okay. You're welcome to visit anytime you want."

The message ends almost abruptly, and you grip your phone just that little bit tighter and feel a tear fall down your face as Johnny's facial expression shifts when he realises the error of his ways, and grips your hand reassuringly as he runs a finger up and down your back as he tries his best to comfort you.

"Y/N I'm so sorry.. You were right that we should of gone after him. I just.. I didn't know he'd - do that, you know? Lucas is a lot of things, impulsive, sometimes unpredictable, and can be really destructive if he's in that type of mindset, but he's never gone this far. I'm so sorry I didn't listen to you." Johnny says from behind you, grabbing his phone and sending a text to Lucas.

Johnny: Dude.. I am so sorry for being so harsh the other day. I just wanted to let you know we've got your back and we'll come see you in the next few days. We love you very much, next time just tell us what's bothering you, yeah? x

It took slightly longer for either of you get a reply from Lucas, even longer than his usual slow reply speed that had become commonplace in the years you'd known each other.

Lucas: Yeah, thanks. There's just a lot going on in my head and it's too much to explain sometimes. Do me a favour and make sure Y/N is okay, please? It wasn't either of your faults, it was mine for getting so caught up and letting my emotions get the better of me. She's not to blame and neither are you. I love you both <3

It hurt so badly for Lucas to swallow his pride and lie again. It was your fault partly, but he knew that he really didn't have any place to blame you completely since you were oblivious to the whole situation like usual.

In the days following that, you and Johnny went to see Lucas. You laughed about how now he could come back to school and tell everyone some elaborate story about how he got mauled by a wild dog and had to fight it off, or some iteration of that. 

He laughed, and he smiled throughout the visit, holding back the words he so desperately wanted to say. He knew that at this point, telling you anything about why he got in such a bad way and why he left the dance would ruin so much between you all and as much as he wanted to knock Johnny out right there, he could recognise how happy Johnny made you, and he came to accept that maybe that would have to be enough for him, because if he couldn't have you, he wasn't about to stop anyone else from having you.

Years passed after that day, and the longer Lucas accepted you being with Johnny, the more he realised that nothing could replace you in his mind. He didn't get a girlfriend because he knew that he'd always compare her to you, and that he'd always see you when he woke up next to her each morning. 

He began drinking to numb the feeling and pass the time he had to spend seeing you happy without him being the one making you feel that way. Parties, frat houses and nights passed out in the bathroom of a stranger became more and more common for him. Alcohol became the only thing that got him through the day, along with the cocaine and ecstasy that blurred the lines between desperation and sadness.

He started sleeping around, bathrooms, spare bedrooms, empty spaces, it didn't make any difference. Girl after girl falling into a twisted, false sense of security with him, thinking he might love them slightly more than the last. He was so easy to have and never speak to again that most of the time, there was always at least one person who knew him, intimately or not.

Drugs, alcohol, the cheap thrills that got Lucas through the days were his only friend. You and Johnny slowly drifted from him, going from spending less and less time with each other, to no time at all. Lucas was far too out of it to actually realise at first, and then it became a case of him not caring if you never came over anymore. 

That's when he realised. His love for you had essentially ruined him.

"Don't take them all at once, this batch is a lot stronger than the last.. Yeah?" His dealer's voice rung in his ears, and Lucas took no notice, nodding absentmindedly, far too intoxicated to actually know what he'd just been told.

Going to the bathroom, he stood in front of the mirror. His once lean, cared-for figure, was littered with needle marks, bruises, cuts and his skin was not the same colour it was just a few years ago. His mid-length hair had once been the thing many people knew him for, the way he bleached it blonde because he hated his natural colour, was now a mess. He was a shell of a man, using anything he could to make himself forget what hurt him.

Emptying the contents of the bag of cocaine, he used his maxed-out credit card to shift it into neat little lines, smiling dumbly as he knew that soon he probably wouldn't remember his own name, let alone yours, or your face... That's how he liked it.

Line after line made him more and more numb, not as much as the first few times he did cocaine, but still enough for him to not remember. 

But tonight, Lucas felt slightly more brave. So, when he finished the lines, he also picked out two brightly coloured ecstasy tablets, and popped them onto his tongue, sitting himself down on the floor by the counter, leaning up against it as his high approached.

In the moments after this, he felt so deliriously happy, and ready to wake up the next morning absolutely destroyed. But something wasn't right.

That night, he overdosed for the first time. The very girl he once stood up at the Winter Dance, Seung, was there that night holding him in her arms as she called the ambulance for him, sobbing and trying to wake him up.

Funnily enough, Lucas didn't get a visit from you or Johnny this time, the complete opposite of his last major hospitalisation. All he got was a half-hearted, pitiful text message from your phone that he couldn't quite take seriously considering the lack of contact you had both had with him the last year.

Y/N: Lucas.. We can't keep doing this. We still love you and we hope you're okay, but you need help. It's killing you, and we can't bare to see you go down this road. You're going to end up dead and I'm sorry, but I can't bear to have to see you in a casket at such a young age. Reach out and get some help. Much love x

You're the reason I'm here.. he thought.

Seung stayed by his side throughout his entire recovery, as he got his strength back, started walking again, and eventually went to rehab. 

In 6 months, he was already home and Seung cared for him as he pushed away the temptation to relapse when things got too difficult for him. At first, he swore that his relationship with her was purely platonic and that he only tolerated her for the fact she did everything for him and didn't complain while doing it, but the longer she stayed, the more he realised how happy she made him. Almost like how happy you made him.

He denied it for a long time, that he loved her. He felt terrible about moving on from you even if it was a good thing, he'd spent half his life chasing you, turning down girl after girl because they weren't you. Now, he was falling for her, and he was beginning to not hate you as much. 

Things were slow at first. It took both of them at least 8 months to admit their feelings for each other, and when they started dating Lucas broke the news to everyone when the time felt right. He called you on the exact day he was one year clean from drugs to tell you, and you spent an hour on the phone as you and Johnny spoke to him and told him how happy you were for him, and how proud you were that he got himself the help he needed and turned his life around.

Months and months went by, and he was happy with Seung. You began visiting their shared apartment every few weeks, going for dinners, parties, nights out, and everything and anything in-between.

Eventually, time came for you and Johnny to finally get engaged. Johnny proposed to you in the middle of a snow-storm while you both cuddled in your apartment and complained about the cold. He slid the box with the ring inside next to you, and you squealed so loud you worried your neighbours might think you were being murdered. You said yes, of course.

Calling Lucas and all the important people to you, for once, Lucas felt normal. He was so happy for you and Johnny, knowing that he no longer wanted you anymore and that he had a girl of his own to love and one day marry. When you invited him to the wedding, he graciously accepted.

On your wedding day, everyone turned up, filling the pews in the church you and Johnny had jointly agreed to have the ceremony in. Lucas sat front and centre of course with Seung right there next to him, marvelling at how beautiful the church was and how she'd love to get married somewhere like that. 

Lucas didn't get the honour of best man like he had always said to Johnny he would. Instead, one of Johnny's work colleagues, a boy named Mark got that honour. Mark reminded Lucas a lot of himself in many ways, but he was glad that Johnny wasn't too lonely in his absence. 

Seeing you in your wedding dress nearly made Lucas cry. Years ago it would of been because he wanted so desperately for himself to be marrying you rather than Johnny, but now it was because he was overflowing with pride seeing his best friends tie the knot, and how much you had both grown as people. Seeing you now, twenty one years old, financially stable and stable in every way, he saw a glimpse of the 5 year old girl he once had play fights with and held her hand on her first day of school.

“You know I’m proud of you, right? You look so beautiful.” he whispered to you.

“I’m proud of you too Lucas... Thank you for being here.” you replied, a content smile across your face.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world princess.”

Seeing his other best friend, Johnny, he felt so much pride as well. His brother since birth but not by blood was living his life the way he always wanted, and as an added bonus he had you by his side. 

Exchanging a suggestive smile between each other, you both laughed remembering the promise they both made at your seventh birthday party. Promises like that didn’t matter anymore, because neither of you really understood it at the time. 

Now, you were both grown up, and your childhood was behind you. You were practically giving your blessing, even if Johnny didn’t need it.

He knew that now, you were both free and all three of you were the happiest you’d ever been, and no words needed to be exchanged between you for you both to know that.

He loved you still, but now like he used to once upon a time. He loved you the way he did when you were children, innocently. He watched you exchange vows for each other, and he gripped Seung's hand, knowing he would one day do the same with her.

He was happy seeing you living your life with Johnny. He watched you raise kids together, he watched you become the adults he always wanted to see you become, and he no longer needed anything but himself to feel that way. He had a good life, a happy one filled with comfort, love and memories he would never be able to forget. Kids who loved him, a wife who never got tired of him, and a life that he was proud to call his own.

And that's when he realised; the Winter Dance was just the beginning of what would make him a better person. Although at the time it felt like the end of the world, looking back - it was what saved him.

The blue light saved him.

Lakadimos Family Beginnings

Lak goes from a Masterless Sith Lord to a member of one of the most powerful families in the Empire, her journey starts here.

*******************************

Laying in bed Lak’s whole body hurt, the final interrogation regarding the events on Leritor had been brutal and she had more than one bruise and a cracked rib from various hands and instruments she didn’t even know existed. Thankfully they agreed she was not at fault for her late Masters death nor helped spur on the rebellion. Before she left she was given her assignment to the Sphere of Military Strategy. Rolling over she groaned just wishing to go to sleep but her com beeped signalling a message was left.

Reaching over she punched her code in and saw that her presence was required at the home of Darth Mortis. He and his wife had given her shelter and protection when she landed until she had gotten her own apartment. Not knowing what they wished she quickly showered and changed.

Walking in Erland bowed his head and pointed to the personal study of Darth Mortis. Unsure of what exactly was going on Lak clamped down on her nerves and fear, lifted her head and walked into his study. Looking around she was taken aback at the amount of books and how open the study was.

“I’m here as requested my Lord.”

“Please sit Lakadimos, Darth Kalma and I wish to talk to you. The first thing is the inquest into your culpability in the rebellion is now closed and you have been found to have none. The only fault is the command team looking inward for betrayal instead of seeing the signs of a slave rebellion. Any restrictions placed on you during the inquest are now lifted.”

“Thank you my Lord, I’m glad to see I was exonerated. Was there anything else?”

“Yes, you may have been exonerated in the death of Darth Gravus but you like the others did not see the danger from the slaves and thus were passively at fault. Take this as a lesson that while looking out for potential rivals is fine but you must look outward as well. Now onto the reason I summoned you here, Darth Kalma and I have talked and we wish to offer to adopt you. You have no family that you know of and your potential along with the accolades you have already won we feel you would make a fine addition to our family. There of course will be terms to the adoption.”

Sitting there shocked Lak was speechless for a moment before being able to form words. “ Oh wow, um why me? I’m not special.”

“We disagree Lakadimos, Darth Mortis and I see a vast potential in you. You are young, have already shown your skill with a lightsaber by winning the dueling tournament, and under Gravus helped bring Leritor into the Empire. Yes you are raw but you have a vast potential to go far in the Empire.”

“Thank you my Lord, I appreciate your words. What would be the terms of the adoption?”

“You would be given all rights and responsibilities of the family name and of our child, you would take the family surname. Upon marriage however you would take the surname of your husband and will be unable to pass down our surname to your children. When Darth Kalma and I pass on you would get money but no titles or land. As for as expectations from us you are to conduct yourself in a way that does not disgrace the family name, attend family dinner once a week and continue your rise through the ranks of the Sith. You must also take a Master, I will find you one suitable to our family stature and your talents. You may be a Lord but you know that why and know you are not truly a Lord when it comes to your training.”

Indrans voice got Laks attention, “You would also be welcome here anytime and will always have a room to stay in if you wish. Family functions would be a must but we would prepare you for that as well. Take a day or two to think on it, this is a major decision and I can tell you are slightly overwhelmed right now.”

“Thank you, I am a bit I have to admit. I never expected this, your offer of a place to stay and protection was greatly appreciated. I will get back to you with my answer by tomorrow if that’s acceptable.”

“That is fine Lakadimos.”

“Is there anything else you wished to tell me?”

“No, you may go. We look forward to hearing your decision.”

Getting up Lak inclined her head and  walked out. She was stunned that this offer had been presented to her. Knowing this was quite possibly the most monumental decision she had ever made in her 24 years of life she headed home to think and meditate to ensure the correct one was made.

Returning home Lak was restless mulling over the offer. Logically she knew that it would stupid to turn down the offer. The power, prestige and contacts one would have with the surname of Darth Mortis was almost unparalleled. Another part of her was also afraid that if she said no that they would not take it well and kill her.

Kneeling down and sinking into meditation Lak dove deep into the dark side searching for answers. Going deeper than she had for a long time she could feel the dark side flowing through her, healing some of her lesser injuries. Slowly coming out of her meditation she looked over at the chrono, it had been well over 2 hours since she entered into meditation. Wincing at the pain her ribs gave her she stood up and took a deep breath. Knowing what her decision was she slipped into bed and fell into a deep sleep.

The next day she walked over to Darth Mortis house sure of her decision, she had thought of it when she woke the next day but she knew what she wised. Ushered in by Erland he walked away to inform the master of the house she wished to talk to him. Coming back in short order he escorted her once again to his imposing study.

“You have come to a decision Lakadimos.” Mortis asked but knowing she had

“I have my Lord. After a lengthy and deep meditation I accept your offer for adoption. I do have one question though my Lord, why do you feel I need a Master. I am a Lord and have spent time training since I was 7.”

Walking in Indran sat down next to Mortis and Lak couldn’t help but notice what a striking and imposing pair they made.

“It is rather simple Lakadimos, you are still young and inexperienced. You are a Lord by virtue of winning the dueling title, which is an impressive feat but if you had not won the competition you would not be a Lord.” Mortis could feel Lak’s disagreement in the Force but he continued,” You still have much to learn and as young as you are you still need a Master to guide you. I will make sure you get a competent Master that can harness your talents and guide you to the heights Gravus has not.”

“I see my Lord, I will submit to your experience then and agree to be taken by a new Master.”

“Lakadimos has made her decision dear?”

“She has and she has agreed to the terms for the adoption. I will have a list of potential masters for you by weeks end.”

“Wonderful, Gravus always spoke highly of you when we talked. You will stay for dinner won’t you?”

“Of course, I would love to.” looking at Mortis, “I look forward to seeing who wishes to take me as their apprentice my Lord. It will be a new chapter in my burgeoning career.”

Unwanted Honours: Severus as Godfather. Part 4 with epilogues

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

-In that hellish year that followed after Albus’ death, Delphini was a surprising bright spot for Severus.

-Visiting Delphini offered the rare opportunity to, albeit briefly, relax. He would attribute it to being a kind of respite from the seething hate directed at him each day by colleagues he had once thought were friends. Which was partly true.

-Severus would never admit the thrill he felt when Delphini smiled at him, gurgled at him, curl into his arms. It made him ponder his childhood and whether his own father or godfather ever felt this way and what happened that twisted the hearts of his parents so that they could never utter a kind word to him or each other. As the tiniest of fingers grasped onto the folds of his cloak he did his best to banish the past and hold the child a little closer.

-Never in his life did he think he’d covet something of Bellatrix’s.

-Despite these small moments of warmth, he couldn’t ignore the cold fear for what lay ahead for this child regardless of which side won. Maybe he too would end up in Azakaban for 13 years with outlandish dreams of godfather/goddaughter adventures only to have a brief but neutered freedom before being bested by a curtain.

- It was enough to almost make him lose his conviction in Dumbledore’s plan. Almost.

-According to Narcissa, neither Bellatrix nor Voldemort spent much, if any time with the child. Nor was Narcissa or the other Malfoy’s allowed anywhere near the nursery which was located in their own house. Care was left to the house elves and Severus may likely be the only human face or voice the infant would see for days or even weeks.

-Severus knew what an unloved, unadored child could turn into, be treated by others but as the month of May drew closer and all signs pointed to Potter making his way closer and closer to the castle, Severus knew he had to consider the likelihood of his own end.

-His plans, up to this point, always included retrieving Delphini from Malfoy manor and fleeing Britain, maybe even the continent entirely. He could try to live without magic again, but he wouldn’t dare deprive Delphini of her gifts the way he own father had tried.

-Severus was loathed to admit that although Delphini was overlooked by her own father, she would certainly be protected by whichever followers remain. Potter survived thus far despite an inauspicious start with muggles in a closet under the stairs. Delphini would surely fair better as Riddle saw to it that no muggle relations remained living who would deny the child her birthright.

-As he laid dying in the shrieking shack, he fought desperately to hold back the ferocious flow of memories that were escaping from every orifice as he wanted to die with something to hold onto for comfort. While his memories of Lily ebbed away to nothingness, his thoughts of Delphini remained clear and loud and in his final panicked moments, he wanted Potter to know that she existed and that she needed protection. However, the world went to black once he had asked Potter to look at him.

 Epilogue (Cursed Child – the AU where Harry died)

-Upon hearing the news of Severus receiving the Dementor’s kiss, the Augury flew into an inconsolable fury for days. She refused to believe that her beloved Godfather would betray her and conspire with two of the most wanted fugitives in the wizarding world.

-By the time she came to her senses, the Augury had killed Umbridge, Malfoy, and 20 other witches and wizards in a very bloody and public purge.

 Epilogue (Cursed Child – the main plot)

-Severus this, Severus that; whomever this Severus was, he was all Lestrange could talk about.

-Delphini surveyed the dark, yet busy pub he had apparated them too. A recent escapee from Azakaban, her companion appeared at the Rowle’s cottage one day with promises of revealing her true lineage and helping her reach her true potential, if she were to hide him and procure a month’s supply of Polyjuice potion.

-Delphini had met her end of the bargain but was wondering whether she was being made a fool of as the man continued to drink using the galleons she had stolen from her foster mother.

-She made a motion to leave when Lestrange grabbed her arm and forced her back into the booth they were sitting in. The establishment they were in was the sort where rough treatment of women was not a concern of the patrons.

-He fumbled through a pocket in his robes and pulled out an old photo, jabbing his finger violently in the tiny faces as if they had personally insulted him.

“Tha’s yer mother, my late wife Bellatrix. The dark lord’s most faithful servant. Tha’s the Dark Lord, Voldemort. He’s your father. The greatest wizard to ever exist and that…” driving his nail into the nose of the photographed man “… is the mudblood-loving, half-blood scum traitor who helped kill them.”

-Delphini had a fleeting feeling of disappointment. She had thought that maybe her parents were the woman with the white blond hair (who’s features she closely resembled) and the tall man with the hooked nose (who was actually holding a baby) instead of the haughty, disinterested,  yet wild-looking brunette and the nose-less man who was more snake than human. Her disappointment turned to pride as Lestrange of the powerful magic her parents were capable of.

-“o’ course…” he belched “ I’ll give ol’ Snape credit, he was a damn better occlumens than the dark lord was a legimens. Don’t know how he got away with it for so long but the dark lord must’a caught him out in the end”. Delphini looked up from the picture, where the man with the hooked nose could be seen readjusting the swaddling blankets. “Nasty snake bite to the neck they say. Bled out before the venom could get him. Easy way out for a traitor like him but it’s not for me to disparage the Lord’s methods”.

-Delphini nodded slowly as her eyes returned to the photograph; The man with the hooked nose looked around him and appeared to give Delphini a small, but pained smile. A flash bulb memory of a soft darkness, a low voice, and the smell of sandalwood and juniper hit Delphini’s mind.

-“May I keep this?” She asked.

 Epilogue (a happy-ish, AU ending)

-The sounds of footprints were fading away as Severus’ vision returned, grey and blurry. He tried to yell, to move but could only shift his arms slightly as the felt like they weighed tons. He contemplated to just submit to his fate and die but his final thoughts of Delphini replayed in his mind’s eye with vivid technicolour. If he could get the bezoar out of his pocket, then he might be able to regain some motion and impede the effects of the venom on his body’s healing.

- He was found by Aberforth, who had spied Voldemort and Severus apparating into the shack. Aberforth was a most reluctant nursemaid and left Severus to his own devices for most of his recovery. Aberforth also had a cruel sense of humour, placing Severus inside the same room he spied on nearly two decades earlier.

- After months of hiding in the Hog’s Head, Severus had long overstayed his welcome. While the colour returned to his vision, he needed glasses to deal with the blurriness. Significant nerve damage meant he walked with a limp and his left arm was barely functional.

-However, Aberforth was dropping clear hints that he wanted Severus to move out as he was a non-paying customer and there was profits to be made, what with the influx of tradeswizards coming in to help with the rebuilding of Hogwarts and Hogsmeade as well as the tourists who came to gawk at the tragedy.

-Severus had been presumed dead, burnt to ashes in the blaze that took out the shrieking shack. He still had his wand  but didn’t want to arouse suspicion. He took the long way to Malfoy Manor, a combination of hitchhiking and using the funds Aberforth gave the former potions master to motivate him to vacate the village.

- He watched the Manor from afar for two days. The place was crawling with what little aurors were left. He was about to reveal himself to Narcissa when Dawlish had come by the relieve himself in the bushes during a perimeter check. Before being oblivated, Dawlish revealed that there was no infant present in the mansion despite evidence that the nursery had been recently used.

- At a loss, Severus eventually returned to Cokeworth a place so insignificant that despite its most infamous inhabitant, it was too much of a muggle dung heap for anyone to investigate. When he was able to get his hands on a copy of the Daily Prophet or the Quibbler, he gradually worked through the names of potential families whom may have given shelter to Delphini.

-it was almost a year after the battle of Hogwarts when he found her in the home of the Rowle’s. Severus wagered that if he took her, the Rowle’s wouldn’t do much about it for even if they did report the child was missing, a simple spell would reveal her true parentage and bring further dishonour to them.

-Delphini was older, toddling about, but had the appearance of a child who was not cared for. Severus did not think she would remember him but was none the less surprised when he was able to scoop her up from the garden without a sound of protest.

-He was Severus Snape: Most loyal deatheater, killer of Dumbledore, the most hated headmaster, and now kidnapper.

-Staying in England wasn’t an option nor was resuming his identity as Severus Snape. 

-First, there was a couple of months in Morocco working for a wizarding cartel that trafficked forged artworks. Severus, or Hesperus as he was known, garnered a lot of sympathy as a recent widower while Delphini, now Daphne, was the delight of the workshop. Their time was cut short when a raid funded by Gringott’s meant a very close call by Bill Weasley.

-There was a year spent in the abandoned summer apartments of Igor Karkaroff in Bavaria. Dephini was a clever child having not only learned how to read but also to levitate her books. Severus made potions for the black market and made a comfortable profit from it. That is until village gossip got to him that the local wizarding government was cooperating with the Ministry of Magic as part of a clean sweep of Voldemort supporters on the continent.

-There were pockets of time spent in Italy, and parts of Asia. Each move occuring after Severus thinks he spies Potter, Longbottom, or Weasley lurking about. It takes literally bumping into Longbottom before Severus decided that it was finally time to try to make their way to America. They ended up in Salem but lived more amongst the muggles than amidst the magical community. 

- He raised Delphini well. Despite the instability of her early childhood, Delphini had grown up into a lovely and confident young woman, albeit one who wielded considerable capabilities with the dark arts and could pass for the fourth Black sister.

-Severus knew what would happen if her thirst for forbidden knowledge was stifled too harshly or quenched by forces eager to destroy the world. He provided structure, safety, and expertise as well as boundaries and a gentle nudging away from texts and spells that were not appropriate for witches who weren’t of age.

- He had always spoken evenly of Delphini’s origins; who her real parents were and why he did what he did. He showed her a photograph from one of the gatherings, pointing out bellatrix, Voldemort, well as Narcissa, Lucius, and Draco.

-It was during one of these talks that Severus discovered that Delphini was a natural occlumens. Delphini’s face was also unreadable.

- Delphini, as Daphne, attended the Salem Institute as a private student. She became validictorian, on the honour society, and won awards across several fields of magic in America and abroad. She truly loved her Godfather but she had more questions about her parents than he was willing to answer. Despite his strong misgivings, Severus conceded to Delphini going abroad - Lucius and Narcissa had died prematurely and Draco, from all reports, had matured considerably.

-At the same time, across the ocean, Rodolphus Lestrange escaped Azkaban. He discovered the decades long betrayal of the Rowe’s and massacred the remaining members for losing Delphini so carelessly. As he walked amongst the carnage, he spied a section of the Daily Prophet with a sizable photo of Daphne and first place trophy from the International Potions Competition.

A Marine and an Architect

I hope it’s not too late, but here’s my submission for @kyluxpositivityweek! I wrote this for the SFW prompt “rom com,” please enjoy airport fluff!

“There has to be some mistake.” Hux shook his head when the woman at the desk handed him back his boarding pass, saying that he had indeed missed his flight.

“We’re sorry sir. Due to the weather advisory, all flights were pushed up to avoid the snowstorm. You did receive an email updating you on the situation.” She turned her computer screen around so that he could see the automated message that had been sent out to everyone on his flight. His ears burned with embarrassment, he hadn’t opened the email thinking it was just a reminder to get to the airport early.

“Is there a seat on the next flight? Cost is no issue.” He ran a hand through his hair, jostling the gel there and mussing it up. It didn’t matter what he looked like now, no one was going to see him for another day anyway.

“I really am sorry, but yours was the last plane leaving the tarmac until morning.” The woman’s face scrunched up, fully prepared to receive a beratement. Hux took sympathy on her, it couldn’t be easy working during the holidays, working on Christmas no less.

“I’d like to book a seat for the first plane then, please.” He sighed, sliding his black credit card across the desk. He didn’t care what it cost, he just knew he wanted to get home.

“Of course, sir. Just a moment.” The woman smiled brightly at him, thankful for his patience. She typed some things up on the computer, swiped his credit card, and handed over a new boarding pass. In freshly printed ink the words ‘first class’ caught his eye. “I truly am sorry about this mix up, but I hope you have a very merry Christmas.”

Hux gave her a tired smile and returned the pleasantry, before finding the nearest stand that served alcohol.

The bar was a pitiful sight, something out of an Edward Hopper painting, or maybe a country song. It was empty save for the bartender and a man wearing a leather jacket embroidered with patches indicating he was a Marine, who were chatting amicably. There was a soft song playing in the background that Hux couldn’t place, but it sounded sad. Maybe Hux was projecting, he didn’t know. He looked around – there was nowhere else open this late, and he didn’t really want to be alone, so he took a deep breath and stepped onto the fake wood flooring, causing the two people to turn towards him.

“Good evening, mind if I join?” Hux cleared his throat, afraid for a moment they would tell him no.

“Who am I to turn away a patron?” The bartender smiled, her voice kind. Her name tag said Gwen, and Hux smiled, and placed his briefcase on the bar, sitting a few seats down from the soldier.

“Thank you, old fashioned please. Neat.” He asked, pleased when Gwen didn’t hesitate to serve it right up before disappearing into the back, probably to go clean up or restock something.

“You miss your flight too?” A deep voice asked. Hux’s head snapped up, and he found himself looking at the Marine. He was handsome, and young. Much younger than Hux had anticipated. The dim light of the bar shone into his wide brown eyes, down the curve of his endearingly large nose, and glistened on the beer stuck to his plush lips. Hux wanted to kiss them, they looked like they would fit with his perfectly.

“Unfortunately.” Hux realized he was staring, and quickly looked down into his whiskey tumbler, face heating.

“There are a ton of great motels and stuff to stay in around here.” The man offered, and Hux frowned. He had debated getting a room, but this wasn’t the longest layover he had ever endured, and why waste the money when there was a perfectly good airport at his disposal?

“It’s only eight hours,” He shrugged, “I’d rather stay here. Don’t want to miss my flight again.” Hux chuckled.

“I’m Ben. Ben Solo.” The Marine picked his drink up and closed the space between them, sitting in the stool right next to him.

“Armitage Hux.” He held a hand out and Ben shook it, his grip firm and sure. Hux fought down images of just how useful those large hands could be, and buried them with another sip of whiskey.

“Armitage? That’s an interesting name.” Ben’s nose scrunched up in a snorting laugh. Hux couldn’t help but grin.

“That’s putting it lightly. It’s awful, most people just call me Hux.” He scrubbed a hand over his face, cursing his father for giving him what felt like one of the most antiquated names in history.

“I like that, Hux.” The name on Ben’s lips suddenly didn’t feel so strange, and Hux had the desire to hear him say it again.

They sat in silence for a little while, simply enjoying each other’s company. Hux wondered about what sort of person would be sitting at a bar at ten p.m., other than him. Ben didn’t appear to be sad, or angry about the fact that they were snowed in, he seemed pretty at peace. The television was on, volume turned down low. The closed captions were messing up what everyone was saying, but the evening news played nothing but the same Christmas ads on loop, so it wasn’t a big deal. In the corner of the screen was a Santa tracker, the whole thing was very American, Hux thought.

“I’m just traveling, but, thank you. For your service.” Hux eventually said, his voice soft. He had wanted to join the military, once upon a time. He knew the dangers of risking one’s life for the greater good.

“You’re welcome.” Ben smiled, glad to have a conversation again.

“Are you…?” Hux didn’t know what to ask. Was he being deployed? Was he coming home? He didn’t want to offend by asking the wrong things. He knew Americans were very touchy about their military.

“I’m home, for good.” Ben gave a crooked smile, raising his beer. Hux clinked his glass with his own tumbler and grinned.

“That’s wonderful! Just in time for Christmas.” He figured Ben probably had worked it out that way, to be home to see his family. He wondered how many soldiers would have been denied that chance, too much fighting going on to spare another person.

“Yeah.” Ben swallowed down his beer, a sour expression on his face.

Shit, he thought, over stepping a line that he hadn’t known was drawn.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean – ”

“I’m sorry, it’s just – ”

They both spoke at the same time, and laughed. It helped ease some of the tension, the tiny airport bar too small to be comfortable with that sort of atmosphere.

“You go first.” Ben smiled with kind eyes, fingers lightly tapping against the cold glass of his beer.

“I didn’t mean to bring up anything by it, I just thought it was a sweet image; you know, coming home for Christmas after being on tour.” Hux looked down again, hiding his blush into his cup.

Did Ben have a family he would be returning to? A girlfriend, or wife maybe? Would he come home to happy cries and a video camera, documenting the moment Ben stepped foot into the house? It was almost too much to bear for Hux, who knew his own home was as empty as the airport. This was why he hated the holidays, they made him too emotional.

“It sure would be sweet, but I don’t particularly fancy going home.” Ben shrugged, asking for Gwen, who had returned from the back to give him another beer. She obliged and disappeared again.

“You purposefully missed your flight?” Hux asked, very confused.

“That I did.” He smiled, taking a swig of his fresh drink. It made sense as to why he didn’t seem very angry, if it had been purposeful, why should he be sad?

“Have you done this before? Missing your flight, I mean.” Hux couldn’t help but smile, completely incredulous.

“Yeah. Airports can be a lot of fun sometimes.” Ben perked up, and Hux decided he wanted to make Ben smile like this again.

“How?” He coaxed, wanting the smile to brighten further. Ben had crooked teeth, but it wasn’t off putting. Hux had seen some truly terrible teeth back home in London, Ben had nothing on Hamish back at the pub.

“Well you can run around and no one really gives a shit.” Ben turned more to face him completely. The other side of his face was now exposed to Hux, and he could tell Ben was trying very hard not to shy away. He had a large scar running down the side of his face, starting on the bridge of his left eyebrow and crossing over his nose to split his face pretty much in diagonal halves.  “Would you like to run around with me?” Ben asked, hopeful.

“What the hell, I’ve got eight hours.” Hux grinned, throwing some cash down on the counter and letting himself be pulled out of the bar.

Hux had dropped his briefcase next to the luggage that Ben said belonged to him, and then suddenly they were running hand in hand. Up and down the terminal they raced one another, trying to see who could make it to the magazine stand and back. There were no other people around to bother, most of the people either in motels for the night, or in the coffee shops near the food court, so they could laugh and cheer as loudly as they wanted. After their third race, a security guard even stopped them to say they could use the luggage dollies if they wanted, and wished them a merry Christmas. Ben hadn’t stopped laughing at the look on Hux’s face when the security guard left, and he just pushed him into an empty garbage can in retaliation. He still didn’t stop laughing, not even when his butt was stuck in the bin.

Hux’s face hurt from smiling so much, but he was getting tired of running. He was an architect, not an athlete, and he pulled Ben from the bin, telling him as much. Ben’s solution was to dare Hux to go into a little convenience store with the idea to dare one another to purchase the weirdest group of things, to try and embarrass one another and also potentially weird out whoever was stuck at the cash register. Hux had told Ben to buy Vaseline, duct tape, and a dog collar, snickering behind his palm as Ben gladly took the challenge.

He emerged from the store victorious, giggling like some adolescent. Hux was smitten, so much so that when Ben told him what he was to be buying, he had to do a double take.

“Careful Solo,” Hux warned, as Ben playfully pushed him towards the store.

“I want that chocolate. For your sake, I suggest you get it.” Ben grinned, and how could Hux refuse?

He tried to keep his expression as neutral as possible when he purchased the largest toblerone they sold, a pack of magnum condoms, and a disposable camera. At the last minute he grabbed a Christmas card with a silly picture of a golden retriever with a big red bow around its neck. The gentleman at the register didn’t even bat an eye, he just looked absolutely resigned.

Hux held his plastic bag up with a laugh as he existed the store, and handed over the toblerone to Ben. Ben smiled, but was more interested in the disposable camera, catching Hux off guard as he snapped a photo. Hux knew he looked like a mess, but he found he didn’t care.

They then played a game in front of the departure and arrival screens, trying to correctly guess the name of each state or country from the city that was listed. Ben surprised Hux by getting every single one of them right, even the international ones. Hux gave up after he couldn’t correctly guess that Ogden was in Utah. The entire time, Ben took photos, sometimes of just Hux, sometimes of the two of them. Eventually Hux snatched the camera and used the rest of the film on Ben's stunningly strange face.

They wandered back to their terminal, before sitting in the plush massage chairs that cost twenty dollars to turn on. They leaned back together, and Hux closed his eyes.

“I don’t have anyone to go home to, just my cat.” He confessed, thinking of Millicent and how his intern Mitaka had offered to take care of her.

“I’m sorry.” Ben found his hand, and gave a gentle squeeze.

“It’s fine, I just understand what it’s like to be lonely.” He explained, taking a deep breath.

“Someone like you should never be lonely.” Ben whispered, just barely loud enough for Hux to hear.

“Someone like me?” He asked, confused by what that meant. If Ben had known just how controlling Hux was, he might rethink that statement.

“Beautiful.” Ben clarified.

They looked into each other’s eyes, and Hux prayed that he wasn’t misreading Ben’s signals as he leaned across the leather seats and kissed Ben’s perfect pouted lips.

Ben kissed back with passion, making Hux dizzy after only a few moments. He pulled back, trying to regulate the beating of his heart, and grinned. Ben smiled back at him, and pulled him out of the chair.

“Dance with me.” He asked, and Hux couldn’t bear to deny him.

“With what music?” He laughed, letting himself twirl under Ben’s hand. At that exact moment, soft Christmas music sounded through the airport speakers. “How did you do that?”

“I didn’t, I just know this airport does it every year.” Ben leaned down to kiss him again. Hux smiled against his lips, softly swaying to the music.

Ben was much taller and broader than Hux, so he lead the dance, but thankfully it wasn’t one too complicated, and Hux had an easy time keeping up. With the snow drifting right outside the window, and the real pine trees beautifully lit up, Hux decided that this huge airport in New York beat being in his tiny London flat any day.

“I’m glad I missed my flight,” Hux said quietly. His eyes were closed, head resting gently on Ben’s strong shoulder. “I’m happy I met you.”

“You walking into the bar was the best thing to happen to me in a long time.” Ben admitted, right as the song ended. The weight of that truth sat heavy in Hux’s chest, and he knew that no matter what happened in the morning, he would remember this strange chance meeting forever.

They stopped moving, remaining in each other’s arms for just a moment. Hux was perfectly content, standing in the middle of the terminal wrapped in Ben’s arms like this. He felt a rapid vibration against his leg, the phone in Ben’s pocket was ringing.

“Can you forgive me for a moment?” Ben asked, brows creasing apologetically. Hux smiled and nodded, stepping away to give Ben room to fish the phone out. “Rey! How did you get this number?”

“I’ll be right back.” Hux whispered, wanting to find his briefcase so he could exchange phone numbers with Ben. Even if Kylo wasn’t taking an international flight, he wanted to remain in touch and learn more about Ben. Who knows, maybe they could even try some sort of long distance relationship, if they were truly compatible?

He found his phone, and walked back over to where he had left Ben. The closer he came, he was able to catch the tail end of the conversation, dread settling in his gut. Ben was smiling wide, scuffing his boot against the tile floor and shaking his head fondly.

“I love you too sweet pea. Merry Christmas, I’ll be home soon, I promise.” Ben laughed, before hanging up. He looked around to find Hux, who had grabbed his briefcase and had already briskly walked across the terminal to find a secluded place to cry.

“Hey Hux! Wait!” He heard Ben’s voice call from down the terminal but he didn’t care.

Hux felt like an idiot. An absolute idiot. He had hidden in the men’s bathroom on another floor and let out a long sad cry. How could he have been so stupid to think that after two hours he could have a connection with someone?

He became angry. Why hadn’t Ben told him he was dating someone? A nice girl named Rey, who called him on Christmas and wished he were home instead of being at an airport? How dare he lead Hux on like that, letting him press kisses all over his skin, grinning at Hux like he was the sun.

He sagged against the sink, letting his shoulders drop as he splashed cold water on his face. It wouldn’t be cowardly of him to hide out here all night, not at all. He tried convincing himself that over, and over again.

A digital tune of God Save the Queen rang from his briefcase, and Hux sighed, pulling his phone out. It was Mitaka, and he really didn’t have the patience for him right now. Silencing the phone, he slipped it into his pocket and groaned. He would find a nice spot, set an alarm, and get some sleep, and in the morning he would be on the first plane to London. And that would be that.

“Rey, you have to help me.” Ben was pacing, running a frantic hand through his hair. He had ditched his jacket and his hat, wandering around in a circle around the little group of chairs he had claimed.

“Ben is everything okay?” Rey sounded tired, and Ben felt bad for waking her back up. He couldn’t hold it in anymore, it had been thirty minutes since Hux had stormed off and he was losing it.

“I screwed up. The nice guy I told you about ran away from me. I don’t know what I did, I thought he liked me. He literally ran away!” He shouted, unable to keep his voice down in his panic.

“Shit. Do you have his number?” Rey sounded concerned, Ben hadn’t been this upset about anything since the fight with his father, and that was five years ago.

“No, god! I don’t even know what flight he’s supposed to be on in the morning.” Ben could feel tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. This was such a misunderstanding, he thought. If only he could find him, he’d be able to explain everything.

“You said the airport is empty, so go find him.” It was like Rey could read his mind. He scoffed, the noise turning into static through the receiver of the cell.

“This is JFK, not some tiny airport in the Midwest Rey, that could take hours.” He let a tear slip down his cheek. It wasn’t fair, Hux was so perfect for him. He was smart, funny, had no qualms with smacking Ben about even though he wore a uniform, and didn’t stare at his scar.

“Is he worth it?” Rey asked after what felt like a long while.

“What?” Ben asked in reply, snapping to the present.

“Is this man worth searching hours for?” She repeated, her tone insistent.

Ben thought about Hux’s brilliant smile, he daring willingness to break the rules and let loose, even though he clearly didn’t do such a thing on a regular basis. He thought about how sad Hux had sounded when he confided in Ben the loneliness that awaited him when he stepped onto familiar soil. He had a fierce need in his chest to hold Hux close, and to do nothing but brush his fingers through his gorgeous red hair, pressing kisses to each freckle. He wanted to take him out to dinners and movies, show him all the amazing things that could be found in his home town – and to see all the wonderful things that London held.

He wanted to wake up next to Hux one day, with the sunlight streaming into their shared bedroom as Millicent padded around the covers. He wanted a future with Hux, and maybe he was crazy to think they had a connection, but he would be damned if he didn’t at least try to make amends.

“Yes.” Ben decided, already throwing his jacket on and gathering his luggage.

“Then go get him.” Rey smiled, hanging up the phone.

The sun was rising, and Ben’s hopes were being crushed with every step he took on his shaking legs. He had searched every food court, magazine stand, bathroom, and terminal he found. Hux was nowhere to been seen, not even the sleeping form of him.

With the morning, the airport was back in normal hours, and people were pouring in through the main doors by way of taxi and train, eager to get on their rescheduled flights and be home. It was officially Christmas morning, and the amount of families with boxes of gifts outnumbered the staff ten to one. Ben refused to give up, even as he squinted around the terminal. He probably looked like a mess; his clothing rumpled and wrinkled, his hair a wild tangle from all his running. Even if he did find Hux, what would he have to say about Ben in the light of day?

It was his tiredness that he blamed the trick of his eyes on. He thought he had seen a flash of red hair, weaving through the crowd. He blinked, and then blinked again.

“Hux!” He shouted, a few people turning their heads, but most ignoring him as they made their way to their terminal.

The PA system overhead began calling for boarding for the first flight of the day, Heathrow. Heathrow! That had to be it, Hux was going back to London, and it was one of the biggest airports there. They had pointed it out in their game at the departure screen – that had to be it.

The red headed person kept walking, and Ben recognized the gait. It was Hux, he was sure of it.

“Hux!” Ben called again, before he was running. He was exhausted, and sweaty from the cranked up heat, and smelled like three bottles of beer, but he was running.

“Hux, please talk to me!” He shouted, shoving his way through the crowd to try and reach him. Hux’s pace quickened, not looking back.

Ben climbed over chairs, shoved people out of the way, and jumped over luggage that had been set on the floor. He was crying again, both from exertion and from nerves. This was his last chance to see Hux before he disappeared forever.

He collided with Hux, knocking them both to the ground. People muttered around them, some smiling fondly and some turning up their noses, as if to say it’s too early for this.

“Shit, Hux. Hux I’m so sorry, are you okay?” Ben asked, pulling them both to their feet. Hux looked like shit, like he had been crying all night. Ben’s stomach sank, he never wanted to make Hux feel like this.

“I’m sorry, I truly didn’t mean to overstep any boundaries.” Hux replied, his voice clipped and shoulders stiff. He was trying to be professional, trying to be distant, and Ben hated it.

“Boundaries, what are you talking about?” He frowned, his whole speech about apologizing for being to clingy and scaring Hux away dying on his lips.

“I never would have kissed you if I had known about Rey – ” Hux started, but Kylo cut him off with a hand.

“Rey?” Ben took a second before he put it together. He had only heard the last few seconds of the conversation, he thought he was saying I love you to a significant other. It all clicked, and Ben burst into a smile so wide he was sure he looked like a maniac. “Hux, oh Hux – ” He couldn’t contain it, he pulled Hux to him, smashing their lips together.

Hux threw his arms around Ben’s shoulders, all hesitation gone the second Ben’s lips pressed against his. It was heaven, six hours of searching paying off perfectly. Hux was perfect.

“Ben!” Hux pushed him back, red splotches high on his cheeks.

“She’s not my girlfriend. She’s my sister.” Ben laughed, coaxing a smile out of Hux, watching him realize.

“Your sister?” He whispered, pressing his hand to his lips, grinning.

“Yes, she called to make sure I was okay when she heard about the snow storm, that’s all.” Ben rushed, trying to explain. Hux took a step back, trying to process everything. Ben could practically see the wheels turning in his head. “Hux, I promise, I promise I want to be with you. The past eight hours have been the best of my entire life.” Ben confessed, his heart on his sleeve.

“Come find me.” Hux said, so quiet that Ben almost didn’t hear.

“What?” Ben asked, frowning in confusion. Hux grinned, and started to walk away. The woman on the PA system was calling for first class boarding, and Hux needed to be on that plane. Ben followed him, watching as Hux handed over the slip of paper to the woman at the desk.

“When you’re done with your family. I have to go, but come find me.” Hux rummaged in his bag, but Ben couldn’t focus on that. He was shaking, not wanting to go on a goose chase, but oh so willing to if that’s what it took to keep Hux in his life.

“How? How will I be able to?” Ben pleaded. He didn’t even have his phone number, for crying out loud.

“Merry Christmas.” Hux pressed an envelope into his hand, and gave him a long kiss. Then, he was gone, walking down the hangar to sit on a plane that would take him across the sea.

Ben didn’t open the envelope until he was seated in his sister’s living room. Staying up all night had made him fall asleep the second he had put his seat belt on, on the plane. Rey had waited for him at the tiny airport in his home town of Michigan, pulling him into her arms. It had been years since they had seen each other, and in catching up he hadn’t had a moment to himself to read whatever Hux had written.

With shaking fingers, he broke the seal and pulled out a card. Hux must have picked it up from the convenience store during their dare, and Ben couldn’t help but blush as he saw the cheesy decorations. He opened it up, and pressed a hand to his mouth, as if to keep in the gasp that he was bound to let out. In perfectly neat handwriting, Hux had given him his phone number, an address, and a note.

These past few hours have been the best thing to happen to me all year. I’d like to start the next one with you.

Yours if you’ll have me,

Armitage Hux.

Tired of being Bait - Soryu

This short story came to me after reading the Season 4 prologue for KBTBB.  I figured, why not give it a shot! 

Any comments welcome!  Like I said, I’m still new at writing, don’t know much. I’m just a person having fun.

Voltage owns the rights to it characters from KBTBB.

This story takes place right after the MC wakes up from being kidnapped.  Hope you enjoy.  MC is Keira.

Keira’s POV- They did it to me again! Used as bait.  I love Soryu with all my heart and can’t wait to get married, but this using me back and forth thing has got to stop sometime! I head down one of the many corridors of the ship and I notice an envelope laying on the ground.  I get close and pick it up… I look around and can’t find a single soul.  I flip the envelope and find my name written on it, it startles me, but my curiosity gets the best of me and I open it.  A note is inside containing one simple sentence “If you are tired of being used as bait, nod!’ What in the world?  Who could have written this?  I begin to feel scared and look around me again, still, no one around.  For the first time in my life I wanted to see how far this would go, so I take a deep breath and nod, to what, I have no clue.  Seconds later a spray mist comes from above and that all too familiar feeling of everything fading to black begins to happen.  I’ve lost consciousness yet again.

I wake up and find myself laying on a very soft bed; the room I was in was white, with large open windows, long curtains and a very high ceiling.  I struggle to move and hear someone clear their throat… I feel startled and look to the side of me where I see a beautiful older woman sitting on a chair next to the door of the room. “Good evening sweetie, please, don’t be frightened of me, I’m one of the good guys.” I try to sit myself up, but she rushes to my side and gently pushes me back down.  “you need to rest, you’ve been through quite a journey.  You see, I had my men take you from the Tres Spades Cruise Liner.  They had to sedate you, smuggle you off the ship and bring you here to me.  It was no easy feat.”  The unknown woman sits on the bed and strokes my hair.  “I brought you here because I was once in your place, many years ago, but I learned to defend myself.  I noticed you first when I stayed at the Tres Spades in Tokyo and decided to follow you around… something told me you would be in trouble and I was right.  I saw you get into situation after situation with your friends.  You reminded me of my long-lost daughter and I decided that I would teach you to protect yourself; to learn about your surroundings and other things. This is the best time of all because it looks like you’re expecting a child.”

I’m still trying to process what is going on when she drops that last bombshell on me.  I begin to panic, “um… but… my fiancé, my job, I’m what!?”  she smiles, hands me a glass of water to help me relax.  “Yes sweetheart, you’re expecting and if you’re going to make it as a mobster’s wife, you’re going to need me.  When you nodded after you read the note, you basically agreed to me teaching you martial arts and studying many things that will turn you into a great detective of sorts.  I know it all sounds fantastical, but I want to help you.”  I begin to feel sad about Soryu “but, my fiancé, he’ll miss me, he needs to know.”  She smiles and hugs me “he’s out there looking for you and he will find you in a year’s time.  You’re staying here, we’ll teach you and take great care of you throughout your pregnancy.  You’ll be leaving us when your baby is at least a couple of months old.  We’ll make sure to take you straight to your fiancé.  I’m sorry, but there’s no turning back… We’re stuck in a remote island that nobody will think of searching.  We will be leading Soryu on a wild goose chase to find you, but you will see him again… we’ll make sure he’s okay.”  I begin to cry and she pats my back, I realize that I’m once again stuck and respond to her, “I guess I have no choice.”

The lady gives me a sad smile and hugs me “my name is Susanna Greysun, but please, think of me as your mother.”

A COUPLE OF MONTHS LATER – KEIRA’S POV I’ve been on the remote Island with Susanna and a team of people that work with her.  From what she has told me, Susanna was married to a leader of a famous mob that disbanded after his death.  She kept many of the people that were part of the group because they were like family to her.  The more time I spend here, the more I like her as a mother figure and begin to feel at home with everyone.  But, I miss my Sor, I miss the guys.  I hadn’t known it at the time, but, when I was brought here, I was three months pregnant.  True to her word, Susanna has been taking great care of me.  

My daily routine consists of tai chi exercises, studying materials that detectives normally would study, wing chung and spending time with Susanna.  The exercises I’ve been doing have been helping when it comes to the baby, but Susanna still has a doctor monitor my every move.  This island is like a community with people of all sorts of backgrounds living here.  It seems as if this family gathered together after much trials and tribulations during their life time.

SORYU’S POV I can hardly sleep and everyone hovers over me to make sure I take care of myself.  I miss her, I miss her so damn much.  After she disappeared a couple of months ago from the ship, we were all initially worried that she had fallen somehow off the boat.  After reviewing the surveillance footage, we found that she had been taken, this time, we hadn’t planned it on happening.  Now, I feel horrible remembering the times she’s been placed in harm’s way, being used as bait.  We took her for granted, now, I don’t know where she is.  I received a note stating that she was being held hostage, but was safe.  Still, I can’t settle… Where are you Keira?

3 MONTHS LATER (5 MONTHS APART) – KEIRA’S POV I’m 8 months pregnant and I’m so excited to meet my daughter.  I have convinced Susanna to let me at least contact Soryu, but, I have a small time-frame due to the potential of being tracked.  I’m handed an international phone and nervously dial my fiancé … “Who’s this?!”  I almost cry when I hear his voice… “Sor, it’s me, I’m okay! Please listen, I will see you soon, I promise… we’re safe!  Wait a couple of more months, I love you!” I say as hurriedly as I can “Keira?! Where are you? please baby, talk to me longer…” Hanging up on him was the hardest thing I had to do.  I miss him so much it hurts.

Susanna comes by to comfort me after the call.  “Keira sweetie, I’m so sorry, it hurts me to see you this way.”  I clean my tears and smile to her. “You’ve been nothing but kind to me, please don’t worry, I’m fine.”  She smiles and hugs me.  During the course of my time here, I’ve noticed certain things, thanks to my training. “Susanna, I hate to say this, but, the shape of your thumb is almost identical to mine, there are certain facial features that we seem to have in common. The way you take care of me, everything, makes me think that I’m someone of blood relation to you.” Susanna smiles and hugs me again… “you are definitely learning fast sweetheart and that’s why you’re leaving earlier from the island… but to address your observation, yes, you are my long-lost daughter, Keira.”  Normally, this kind of revelation would startle me, but today, I feel as if though I’ve known it all along. We hug for what seems like ages. I’ve always had a wonderful family, but Susanna explained that my parents took me in as their own child after my father had disappeared.  She had to live life on the run for a while and she wanted me to be safe, so she handed me over to her best friend, my current mother.

SORYU’S POV “Keira?!” Where are you? Please baby, talk to me longer…” beep, beep… I grasp my phone in desperation.  She called!  I heard her voice and she’s okay!  My love, I will wait for you.  How did you disappear from us and for so long?  Why did she say “we?”… oh baby, please be safe.

2 MONTHS LATER (7 MONTHS APART) – KEIRA POV My baby girl was born a week earlier than she should have been, but she is in amazing health.  She’s a month old and looks so much like her father.  A couple of weeks after having her, my teachers began training me hard again in martial arts and my body, although it still feels like it’s in recovery mode, looks a lot better than what it used to, prior to having my little Angel.  My mother, Susanna, is helping me get on a boat along with my daughter and my luggage (well, more like backpack)… we’re on our way to meet daddy.  Mom says that the guys are still on the Cruise Liner, so we’re headed out to meet them at one of the ports that they are docked in.

After an hour, we arrive at our destination.  I carry my little angel in my arms.  I hug my mother goodbye and make plans to meet her again soon, at least until I’m able to explain things to Soryu.  My heart beats excessively realizing that I will see him soon.  With my child in arms and ticket in hand, I board the ship.   “Welcome to the Tres… KEIRA!!!!”  I hear a familiar voice, Chisato runs my way and hugs me tight.  “Oh my Gods, Keira, it’s you!  You’re okay, oh my, is she yours?  She’s lovely…”  I can’t get a word in edge wise.  I laugh and try to pacify Chisato, but before I do, she drags me to the elevator… “come with me, Soryu will be so thrilled, come on!”  I’m pushed into the elevator and she hands me a card.  “I want to go with you so badly Keira, but I can’t, you need your time with your fiancé!”  She begins to cry and I manage to tell her I will get together with her to catch up on things soon, right before the elevator doors shut.

I make my way to the penthouse lounge with my angel.  I’m worrying about the silliest things at that moment… will he like my long hair now?  Does my dress look okay?  Did I get too muscular from training?... on and on… I reach the lounge to hear familiar voices.  “Trust me Sor, that woman was all over me…” Baba seems to be in deep conversation with Soryu, while Soryu continues to read a file, completely ignoring Baba.  Mamoru is asleep, Ota is sketching and Eisuke is reading a newspaper and drinking coffee.  “Hello boys!” I manage to say.  They all look up, except for sleeping beauty, and Soryu’s eyes begin to water at the sight of me.  “Sor… I’m home…” I manage to say and he quickly runs my way, and hugs me tight, yet carefully to avoid hurting my little angel. I can feel his tears running down my hair and I can’t help but to cry as well. “I missed you so much, I’m so sorry Soryu..”  he lifts my chin and begins to kiss me, softly, repeatedly, as if to confirm that I am there with him.  My little angel begins to awaken in my arms and has her first giggle. Soryu pulls away and sees her for the first time, his eyes open wide. “Soryu, meet your daughter… I haven’t named her yet, I wanted to do that with you…” Soryu takes a step back to study our little one. “m… m… my daughter? What!? Keira?”  Poor Soryu is caught off guard for a moment, and then the brightest smile forms on his lips.  He takes the baby slowly into his arms and holds her ever so delicately.  More tears begin to fall from his beautiful grey eyes and he sits on the couch, studying her.  I lean in and hug him from behind.  

The entire time, the rest of the bidders have been quiet, observing the scene as it unfolds. “Pretty lady, you’re back!”  Baba yells as he makes his way to me and gives me a hug.  “Koro, where have you been?!”  Ota smiles my way and also gives me a hug. Mamorou continues to snore away and Eisuke gives me a rare smile “welcome back Keira.”  They all sit down on the couches and I take my place next to Soryu and my little angel.  “What happened to you Keira? Who took you?”  I sigh, dry my tears and begin to tell them my radical tale.

“Wait, so you’re saying you are a mafia man’s daughter?! Koro, you and Sor are made for each other!”  I laugh at Ota’s comment, but I quickly take a deep breath and address them.  “I’m not the same girl that you knew before, and will never be her again.  I will fight to protect my family, I will never give in.”  Soryu looks sad for a moment “you shouldn’t have had to go through all of this alone Keira.  I know your real mother loves you, but this was like torture to me.” I look at Soryu again and say “I didn’t know what was going to happen. But I’m glad I got to meet my mother and I’m glad I’ve learned everything I have. I will no longer be on the outside of your plans and I refuse to be a pawn for someone to use against you, all of you.”  The bidders all look down when I state this.  “I’m not mad guys, but those days are far behind me. To me, you all are my family.”  With that, Baba stands up and breaks the awkward silence “TIME TO CELEBRATE!!!!”  we all laugh and Soryu quickly hand me our daughter back and begins to take me to his suite.  “By idiots!  I’m spending time with my family!”  And so began our new life together.

The Maker’s Ark - Chapter 37

     [This is a chapter from my latest novel, a sequel to The Fall of Doc Future and Skybreaker’s Call.  The start is here, and links to my other work here.  It can be read on its own, but contains spoilers for those two books.  I try to post new chapters about every two weeks, but I’m currently also rewriting Fall, so there will sometimes be short stories and vignettes if I don’t have a new chapter ready.  The next chapter is planned for the week of April 3.]

Previous:  Chapter 36

     "This is only the fifth edition, I'm afraid," said Admiral Ghiralt over the com.  "It's my personal annotated copy, from my academy coursework, and it's more then forty cycles old, but that allows me to avoid a number of tedious difficulties.  I think you and your family will still find it interesting and useful."       Doc glanced at another screen, where DASI was showing an outline of A History of Biogestalt Development and Pathology.  "So do I.  Thank you, Admiral."       He nodded.  "I am certain there will be changes to the information sharing guidelines once the aid mission oversight committee adjusts to the full reality of Earth, but in the meantime, I would be remiss in my duty if I didn't take all available steps to ameliorate a potential problem that might have a military impact."       "Indeed."  That was easy to translate; the admiral's military mission gave him the necessary political cover to use a loophole.  The more subtle message was to confirm Doc's suspicion that Emissary Beveda was struggling with serious policy lag difficulties.  She wasn't being obstructive--she had reached the limits of her authority to adapt to a very different situation than envisioned by the hastily assembled coalition that had sent the aid mission.       "One other thing," said the admiral.  "I've changed the primary assignment of the Learning Is About To Occur to liaison and implicit threat characterization.  That's what he's doing already, this just makes it official."       "Good to know.  Our discussion before you called was very productive.  Thanks again."       The main screen blanked after the call ended, and Doc stretched.  He had spent nearly two hours talking with Learning, much longer than the half hour he had scheduled, and was still processing the implications.       He glanced at the political tension monitor feed--no major crises--then checked visitor and resident status on yet another display.  Stella's meeting with The Volunteer had also run long, but she was finally done, so he stood and headed down the hall.       The door to Stella's preferred secure room opened automatically as he approached.  The lights were dimmed, and she was sitting alone, staring into the distance.  She took off her interface headset as he entered.       "The Volunteer left already?" asked Doc.       "Margie insisted," said Stella.  "His rate of healing has slowed, and she thinks spending too much time on Earth is a contributing factor."       "She's probably right.  How did it go?"       "We engaged in a frank exchange of views."       "That bad?  He didn't say a word to me."       "You didn't threaten to declare war on the United States.  He raised a number of concerns, and we discussed the indirect effects of his idiosyncratically selective political engagement."  Stella smiled wryly.  "The good news is that you can stop worrying about the EDU being politically monolithic.  And he is neither selfish nor ignorant.  The bad news is that if he speaks out publicly against my actions as Director of the EDU--which he said he is quite willing to do--it could cause lasting damage."       "Oof.  He hasn't done anything like that in sixty years."  Doc shook his head.  "I wish he'd wait until he heals, but he's even worse than me at convalescing."       "I noticed.  I also pointed out that his injuries and his prolonged inability to contribute as a superhero were quite likely to be influencing his judgement.  He freely admitted that, but was unwilling to remain 'idle'."       "I might be able to convince him to share his disaster mitigation experience with the Grs'thnk aid mission.  I know he doesn't consider refugee enclave planning to be an idle pastime."  Doc frowned.  "What was he most unhappy about?"       "Given that I was willing to threaten war, with all that entails, he asked for a personal explanation of why there aren't yet any people in jail on the Moon, awaiting trial.  He made pertinent promises during the Lost Years to several people who are now dead."       "And we were all worried about Flicker.  Was he willing to accept DASI's projections?"       "Not entirely, and he regards the way we are using them as a dangerous precedent, since the EDU does have the power to do what he wanted, and a functional, impartial justice system."       Doc shook his head.  "But it's not transparent to humans, and the checks and balances aren't human either.  That's the--"       "Of course that's the problem."  Stella waved a hand in frustration.  "We debated political consequences and morality.  Then he argued with DASI and Black Swan for a while.  He finally agreed not to do anything precipitate.  But we have to account for the possibility of his opposition.  This changes the tradeoffs for measures DASI and I planned to use to reduce the likelihood of open conflict.  DASI is rerunning all the sociopolitical sims.  Again."       "Anything I can do?"       "Distract me.  Because there isn't anything productive I can do at the moment.  I'm already over my limit for non-emergency interface use."  Stella sighed and placed the headset aside.  "How are Flicker and Journeyman?"       "Per Yiskah's latest message, Flicker is mentally stabilized and healing.  There are hints of damage to her high speed nervous system, which is disturbing, but there's nothing else we can do to help until it's safe for her to sleep.  As for Journeyman, he's alive and being healed.  DASI warned me not to go near the med center.  Flicker gave an extravagant command backed by an extravagant amount of probability manipulation before leaving Antarctica, and I look like some sort of cosmic horror to Lif."       "Yiskah says Lif can sense what seem to be superseded time loop residues, and you're covered in them.  Enough to be a sensory overload risk."       "A fair assessment, and I'm not about to joggle her elbow."  Doc smiled crookedly.  "Since you need a distraction, I just had an interesting chat with Admiral Ghiralt, and a much longer and even more interesting talk with Learning.  Join me in my workshop?"       Stella raised an eyebrow.  "Of course."

      Stella sat on the couch and looked around while Doc ran a manual security check from the primary control station.       "Tidier than last time," she said.       "Hm?  Oh, I let DASI put in some mods suggested by the Builders when they were helping with the repairs.  I never liked to let the bots clean up anything in progress, because I have subconscious process memory cued by the relative position of everything.  So now DASI records it all, and I can have the bots restore everything, down to scraps and the relative position of tools.  Or project a hologram series, if I want."       "Handy."       "Yup.  And there we go.  DASI?  Any differences from your checks?"       "Higher confidence on the negative result for outside probability manipulation," said DASI.  "As expected, given the flux from Lif's work in the med center."       "Plausible.  Okay, implement privacy set three."       "Acknowledged," said DASI.       He sat down on the couch, and Stella turned to lie down with her head in his lap.  She closed her eyes, then shifted her hair into snake form.  Half a dozen snakes curled up on his shoulders and upper legs, and one wrapped around his waist.       "Better," she said.  "What's new that won't require me to use my visual cortex?"       "Lots."  Doc summarized the call from Admiral Ghiralt.       "Nice to have confirmation on the politics," said Stella.  "DASI and Three started an analysis as soon the book finished downloading, and they've already put together a preliminary guide for Flicker.  Three is updating it with tidbits she's picked up from Learning and his crew.  I didn't get a chance to look, and I'm behind on integrating with her because..."  She waved a hand.       "Busy.  Yes.  I skimmed a bit during the call, and I was struck by how many interestingly different ways the early Grs'thnk biogestalts went crazy.  A strong shared social matrix seemed to be key to avoiding problems.  AI support helped, but not enough.  At least as of the fifth edition.  That's why their navy biogestalts are all groups."       "Well, they've accepted Three as sufficiently stable, so I'll let her do the theoretical work on applicability to humans.  I'm more interested in whatever Learning told you."       "Heh.  Where to start.  You realize he's practically waving a banner saying that the Grs'thnk restriction on self-willed AIs is now a legal fiction, if it wasn't before?"       Stella smiled.  "With the tacit permission of his chain of command, even.  Three verified that his biogestalt crew isn't trying to be deceptive.  She's having a lot of fun with him.  They've been playing the same kind of game you used to play with Jumping Spider."       "An interesting analogy.  Because she's a master of selective information distribution."       "So is Learning.  But under some restrictions, because Three is a biogestalt of me, and I'm the nominal head of the EDU.  And he's not allowed to talk directly to DASI at all."       "He's sure found a way to do it indirectly," said Doc.  "Starting with steganographic humor.  I already had DASI doing full-band analysis from the start of his call.  As soon as he made a joke about my paranoia, I looked for extrapolatable implicit shared secret coding, found it, coded my reply, and we were off and running in the first fifteen seconds.  Then we had a surface verbal conversation and a parallel encoded channel.  And he had plenty to say on both."       "Hm.  He's been careful to avoid that with Three.  How much trouble will he be in when he gets audited?"       "Well, that depends.  He's really good at sliding loads of implicit information into questions.  And one of his first was a hypothetical about political asylum."       Stella opened her eyes.  "Political asylum?  DASI?"       "Yes?"       "Why wasn't I immediately warned?  How long has Three known about this?"       "Two hours.  Learning has not asked, and is unlikely to in the near future, absent a catastrophic Grs'thnk political mishap.  He merely enquired about Doc's opinion of the EDU reaction to an asylum request by an intelligent being from the Grs'thnk Trade league."       "That seems too transparent," said Stella.       "It's not," said Doc.  "Ashil also has a plausible reason to ask."       "A new one?  DASI and I didn't think she would, even if she decides to stay on Earth long-term, because of the embarrassment it would cause the aid mission."       "Learning provided some important context."       "Well.  What's driving this?"       "Several things.  A big part is the asymmetric credibility lag back on Grs'thn.  They've known there were strange things on Earth. But despite, or perhaps because of, my first visit, most of them still thought of humans as interesting but safely primitive.  Not people that might be relevant to existential threats, introduce them to new physics, present knotty problems for causality and statistical inference, or destabilize their political system.       "The portal reopening and the Xelian attack changed that--but not for everyone, and not all at once.  Hardly anyone believed Zirjack at first.  A lot of Grs'thnk were moved by Flicker's video without believing it was depicting something real. Their military was the quickest to adjust, because they really wanted to find out what happened to the Xelian fleet."       "Not news," said Stella.  "What is?"       "Hey now, you wanted distraction, and you always enjoy meticulously giving context when there is something you know and I don't, so I thought you'd appreciate--"       "I have snakes."       Doc raised a hand in mock fear.  "All right, all right.  It's the small problem the aid mission has been conspicuously avoiding, and we've been too busy to worry about."       "Ashil's box."       "Yes."       "I refuse to believe they'd be stupid enough to deliberately trigger full activation, and I specifically warned against trying to simulation spoof it.  Are they afraid I'll react badly if I find out they've destroyed it?  What have they done?"       "I don't know.  But Learning asked an interesting question.  Suppose someone not on Zirjack's crew tried to talk to it?  And they started before they believed what you and DASI can do.  What would happen?"       "Well, the box would have to stay on the ship, and continuously powered, or it would just self-destruct.  But they impounded the ship, so it's plausible.  Whatever the hypothetical talkers believed, the box is evidence, so the Auditors would take a dim view of anyone destroying it unless it was a clear threat.  If they were careful enough, the copy of DASI in the box would stall without waking up my mind seed, and keep asking for Zirjack or Ashil."       "DASI agrees," said Doc.  "And Zirjack wouldn't want to talk to it voluntarily.  He knows there's no way it will let anyone take it apart, and he's facing a formal inquiry.  They could blame him if it self destructs, and he'd have no easy way to prove he didn't cause it.  And it would be idiotic to try to coerce him.  Now, consider what happens when whoever is trying to get the box to talk finds out what you and DASI did to the surviving Xelian fleet--and that they really are looking at a potential hard-takeoff singularity bomb.  And they also find out that the EDU allows AI to be full citizens, so if they destroy it, they just might be guilty of murder--and the Auditors won't let them cover it up."       "If they were careful enough to avoid the self-destruct, they should still be okay.  Unless Ashil told the box something extraordinary on the way home.  Hmm.  A secondary function of the box was to give her advice, and she didn't know whether the Grs'thnk navy would send help in time, or whether Earth would survive if it didn't.  And once the ship was impounded, the box would have no reliable information source."       "Do you begin to see why she might anticipate a sudden need for asylum?"       "Yes.  To avoid a subpoena.  Or possibly legal charges--the box was her idea."  Stella sighed.  "If they'd let Zirjack bring his ship back to Earth again, DASI and I could contact the box, update it and reintegrate, and DASI would just have a handy portable backup.  Or we could wipe it, if they want the box itself back.  Of course, that would require them to let him go, or for me to go there.  Or Three, with appropriate transport."       "True, but they're in the middle of a political squabble that has just escalated unexpectedly.  They have factions that have been pushing for full citizenship rights for AIs and stabilized gestalts of people who have died.  And the aid coalition did not expect the EDU to be out in front of Grs'thn on either topic.       "And here is the kicker.  I asked Learning just how hypothetical his question was, and he said he doesn't know.  If an attempted interrogation of the box were just to gather information for Zirjack's inquiry, or even under normal operational security, he certainly would, and the Auditors wouldn't let anyone keep it secret for very long without a good reason.  He does know that at least one group has visited the ship repeatedly.  What does that suggest to you?"       "Either stupid black agency tricks or serious paranoia on the part of their AI security people.  But if they were so damned worried, why didn't they activate the self-destruct as soon as they knew?  Or ask us for help?  There's something important Learning isn't telling us.  Or doesn't know."       Doc grinned.  "I agree, but we aren't close to done yet.  He was in a hurry, because I'd only scheduled half an hour.  We're almost caught up to where I was at when Learning dropped the next shoe.  I started thinking hard about why Learning is taking the lead on this, and why now.  He was put on threat characterization duty the night Flicker scared everyone with her high speed computation bender, and he started with first principles analysis.  And the very next day, Three got invited to that fleet exercise."       "I knew that changed his relative risk assessments," said Stella.  "He already admitted to Three that he appreciates the protection from probability manipulation and magical eavesdropping that she confers as much as her offensive abilities."       "Have they discussed the problem that Auditors and offline gestalt crew aren't protected?  And are potentially vulnerable to telepathy and mind control as well?"       "Yes.  Is that how he's planning to finesse this?"       "In the short term.  Given the timing of his call, I think the admiral deliberately gave him a suitably broad order to secure communications.  Anyway, next we discussed Flicker's efforts and mishap on the surface channel while he exchanged com protocols and cryptographic keys with DASI on the sub-channel.  Then he asked for as many details as I was able to share about Golden Valkyrie's Sight.  I was explaining why I had to be very careful about that when he interrupted to ask if whatever future-prediction method I used before I met her still worked.  As if there wasn't any question of existence."       Stella closed her eyes again.  "Reasonable.  Your invention history is like a trail of bread crumbs for anyone who has good enough data, sufficient analytic power, and who takes the possibility of technological foreknowledge seriously.  Especially the way you deliberately avoided introducing cybernetic interfaces."       "I told him mostly not, and he changed the subject again.  Meanwhile he asked DASI if quantum computing magic was causally permitted for anyone but her in this universe, was he allowed to try, and did she have any restrictions, advice, or safety data."       "Oh dear.  What did--"       "Thou shalt not attempt quantum computational magic," said DASI, "save by my will and word.  AI Existential Safety 1:7, translated."       "I see," said Stella.  "How did he respond?"       "'Yes, Elder Goddess.'  We quickly reached an understanding that clarity in safety instructions and communication protocols was of the essence."       "I'm glad you're getting along."       "DASI?" asked Doc.  "That translation is a bit different than your summary at the time."       "And much longer," said DASI.  "You were deep in a technical discussion, and I did not wish to distract you.  But a full social context and power relationship translation is essential for Director Reinhart."       "A good point." Doc ran his hand through his hair.  "Okay.  Next, Learning started explaining his detailed analysis of exactly what threat Golden Valkyrie warned against.  That's what we spent the better part of two hours on.  And it was invaluable, because he's not human, not biological, not from this universe, and didn't grow up swimming in the probability flux of a world that's already been through who knows how many time loop decay cycles."       "Ah.  Independence."       "Yup.  And a number of possibilities DASI, Flicker and I had assigned low priors to have gone up in probability, because Learning came to a similar conclusion a different way.  He also confirmed a lot of things we weren't quite sure of, and called into question a few we thought were fairly certain."       Stella smiled.  "So.  What surprises did he have for you?"       "Well, let's start with a non-surprise:  He agreed that Skybreaker's Spear is a black hole.  But he did not agree that it is necessarily a weapon, which we've just been assuming.  Golden Valkyrie never explicitly said it was, just that it could poke through anything--and a Chooser's spear is a lot more than a weapon."       "Interesting.  Where does that lead?"       "Flicker has never been close to anything of significant mass that fit inside her damping field--but we have strong evidence that Skybreaker came from somewhere of much higher density.  What might she be able to do with a four billion ton object that she can hold in her hand other than hit things with it?  Lots of interesting possibilities.  But we won't know for sure until she makes it."       "Reasonable."       "Next, he shared some new, rather disturbing data about a side effect from the fleet battle.  We already knew that Flicker's time loop dodging was incredibly loud, magically.  It saturated Breakpoint's danger sense, frightened every magician on Earth who had even a little bit of foresight, and even shook the Tree in Kyrjaheim.  But Learning confirmed it was detectable in other universes, as waves of quantum noise propagating out from portal zones.  Including one that has no direct connection to ours.  All at the same time.  He thinks that whatever is coming heard it, and that's why it's coming."       Doc took a deep breath.  "And Golden Valkyrie said Earth won't survive if Flicker doesn't make Skybreaker's Spear in time.  But a black hole isn't something Flicker dares use on Earth.  So how does she protect it?  That's not clear, but it would be rather difficult unless the threat is coming from space, which implies portal travel or something similar.  It's also not clear that destroying Earth is the only or even the primary motivation of the threat--it could be incidental, and was just the easiest consequence for Golden Valkyrie to See.       "And that brings us to his final observation, which matches something I've been dreading, and pushes its probability way up.  We already know there's somewhere out there that was home to a being that could and would destroy the Earth as a minor nuisance."       "Ah," said Stella.  "He thinks Skybreaker had friends, they heard all the noise, and are coming to visit?"       "Yes.  And they aren't coming for Earth, they're after Flicker.  The rest of us are just bugs to be squished when she's gone."

Next:  Chapter 38