#and there’s a lot i have learned and could learn from it
Text
eyes wide open
pairing: theodore nott x f! reader
summary: you discover that there is so much more to theodore nott than you thought.
content: gryffindor! reader, semi-nsfw (characters are 18+)
word count: 5.46k
You have never spoken to Theodore Nott before. You’ve him around a lot, usually with Mattheo Riddle or Lorenzo Berkshire, and he is a regular on the quidditch team — a chaser — so you’d see him zoom by during matches. He’s also in a majority of your classes for this year, which lets you observe him from afar. But past that, you’ve never really had much to do with him beyond seeing him with Malfoy and witnessing how he stands quietly — with either a small smirk or a look of complete apathy on his face — while Malfoy and your friends argue back and forth.
Having class with Theodore Nott has let you learn three things about him: he’s quiet, whip-sharp, and unbelievably handsome. You didn’t need classes with him to know the last one is a well-known fact; he’s constantly noted as one of the most attractive of your classmates. “Shame he’s a Slytherin,” Lavender Brown once said to you, which had made you roll your eyes and retort, “And what’s wrong with that?” It had gotten you into a big fight and you don’t think she’s spoken to you since, not that you’ve really wanted her to.
“Are you sure you don’t want to come with us?” Ron asks you as he, Hermione, Harry, and Ginny stand at the entrance to the Gryffindor common room. “Mum would love to have you. She’s always banging on about what a lovely girl you are and how polite you were.”
“And I’m sure Fred would love to see you,” Ginny adds.
You snort, “I’m really sure. But please give my regards to your mother and Fred.”
“Will do,” Ginny says with a two-finger salute.
Your friends say their farewells as they leave through the portrait hall. You flop against the plush velvet of the couch, staring at the roaring fire. Your parents were on a months-long that brought them to see famous wizarding landmarks so you’re stuck at Hogwarts for the holiday. You’re a little disappointed that you won’t be with your family but another part of you is excited to be in the castle when it’s less populated. You’ll finally get to make your way through the massive pile of books you have at your bedside since you’re usually caught up in listening to and gossiping with your roommates.
You head up to your room, empty except for you and your owl hooting in his cage. You wiggle your fingers inside, Ramses rubbing his feathery head against them. You grab the first book from the top of your pile, turning the leather-bound edition over in your hand. Hermione gifted it to you for your last birthday: William Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. You shimmy into your gold and red striped sweater and tuck the book underneath your arm, walking down to the dining hall for dinner.
Students are scattered around the Great Hall, some chattering with their friends while others eat silently. The ceiling has shifted to depict a clear night sky, floating candles casting an orange glow. You spot Mattheo Riddle alone at the Slytherin tables but the way he keeps looking to the door makes you assume he’s waiting for a friend. You settle down on a bench all to yourself, piling your plate with the mouthwatering selections available to you.
You rest your chin on your fist, cracking open the play. You get only a few pages in when you hear a familiar low voice. “All alone, little lion?” His eyes examine you and you suddenly feel too exposed despite your layers.
You come face-to-face with Theodore Nott and his sea blue eyes. He regards you coolly and you ask, “Can I help you, Nott?”
He points at your copy of Romeo and Juliet. “Where’d you get that?”
You furrow your brow in confusion. Why in Godric’s name is Theodore Nott of all people interested in a Muggle book. You respond, “Hermione gave it to me. Why?”
“It’s hard to find Muggle books here,” he says. His eyes linger on the play. “Think I could borrow it when you’re finished?”
Your brain stalls, questions floating around your head. “Sure,” you finally answer. He nods and neither of you say anything more. The quiet that falls between you two makes you tense and you say, “Is that all, Nott?”
He considers and then says, “I think so.” He heads to the Slytherin tables without another word, sitting beside Mattheo, who’s been watching on keenly. You catch his stare and he smirks, raising a hand in a casual wave. Theodore smacks his shoulder and pulls Mattheo’s hand down.
You sigh, shake your head in disbelief, and go back to reading the play.
It’s been a few days since your encounter with Theodore, but the interaction sticks with you. Every time you open up the play, you’re reminded of it and your curiosity returns tenfold.
It’s odd being at school when it’s this empty. You’ve managed to occupy yourself by playing Wizard’s Chess with some fifth years, helping Professor Flitwick organize his classroom and the Frog Choir’s practice room, and working on knitting gifts to give you friends when they return.
You’re sitting in the Gryffindor common room, working on Harry’s scarf, when you spill a cup of tea one of the house elves had made for you. Cursing, you move your knitting out of the way and survey the damage to your sweatshirt. With a groan, you gather your things and bring them to your dorm, blotting out the growing stain with water and letting it dry over the edge of the bathtub.
You slip into a forest green sweater and throw a brown corduroy jacket over it. You grab your copy of Romeo and Juliet and head down to the Black Lake. The cold breezes nip at your cheek and carries the scent of pine trees, which you inhale gratefully. You plop yourself underneath a tree on the shore of the lake, reclining against the trunk and cracking open the book.
You’re not even a page in when you hear a familiar voice call your name. Your hold on your book tightens but you peer up, watching Theodore approach. He’s in a dark wool overcoat and similarly dark trousers, hands tucked into his coat pockets. His strides are leisurely and long, reaching you in only a handful of steps.
He stands tall in front of you, shadow cast long in the afternoon sun. His gaze roams over you and he says, “Isn’t wearing green considered treacherous for you?”
You’re confused for a second before you follow his line of sight and glance down at your own sweater. Right. You reply, “No more than it would be for you to wear red.”
The corner of his lip twitches up in a small, half-smile and he says, “High treason then.”
You echo your words from earlier in the week: “Can I help you, Nott?”
He ignores your question, instead choosing to tip his chin at your book. “What part are you at?”
“Mercutio’s died in his duel with Tybalt.”
He nods and recites, “‘A plague o’ both your houses. They have made worms’ meat of me: I have it, and soundly too: your houses.’”
You don’t bother to hide your surprise. “You’ve read it?”
“Haven’t most people?”
“Sure, most people know the story but they don’t usually read it.
“I’ve read it a couple of times,” he admits. He adds, “My mother’s favorite book.”
“I see. Is that why you want to borrow it from me?”
“Yeah.”
Silence falls between the pair of you. Distantly, there’s a cry of crows. Theodore is still standing above you, gazing down, and you squirm a little. He then says, “I always liked Benvolio.”
You’re reminded that Theodore’s half-Italian in the way he says ‘Benvolio,’ accent smooth and lilting. It suddenly feels a little too warm under your coat but you ignore it. You instead blurt out, “Of course you would. You’re kind of like him.”
Theodore raises one eyebrow and you feel your face heat even more, embarrassed, and you hope he doesn’t take it as a bad thing. He doesn’t seem offended though and asks, “Oh, how so?”
“I mean,” you say, “you are— well, you seem like the most reasonable of your friends. A mediator of some sort.”
“That sounds about right,” he says. “You remind me of Juliet.”
“Really? Why’s that?” You’re not sure if you should take it as a good thing or not.
“Well, she has a solid set of beliefs and stands up for them. She knows herself; she tells her parents that she doesn’t want to marry Paris, not just because she’s in love with Romeo but also because she knows she’ll be unhappy. What is it she says? ‘Now, by Saint Peter’s Church, and Peter too, he shall not make me there a joyful bride! I wonder at this haste, that I must wed ere he that should be husband comes to woo.’”
Theodore’s mouth lifts in a tiny, lopsided smile again and he says, “Plus, she’s the one most of the guys fawn over, right?”
You’re left to gape at him in shock and awe, processing what he just said as he turns and walks back to the castle along the shore, just outside the gentle lapping of the water. You watch his retreating figure, watch as he grows smaller and smaller and eventually disappears.
You don’t get much reading done, the book remaining open in your lap and your eyes fixed on the spot where Theodore once stood.
You sit there until the top curve of the sun is just peeking out over the horizon and you stand, still a tad dazed, and make your long walk back to Hogwarts.
It’s just past one in the morning and you can’t sleep, tossing and turning fitfully. Theodore Nott and his long shadow and his blue eyes keep appearing behind your eyelids, no matter how much you try to shove the thoughts out. You want to bang your head on one of the wooden poles holding up the canopy of your four-poster bed, but you opt for sliding on your slippers and going down to the kitchens to see if the house elves have any leftover brownies from dinner. Maybe they could warm up a mug of hot cocoa for you too.
You shuffle through the hallway, the chill of the castle waking you up. You rub your hands along your arms, wishing you had worn something over your pajamas. Since it’s break, restrictions about when and where students could go are essentially non-existent. You pass Filch, who scowls at you, clearly aggrieved that he can’t punish you for being out of bed, and Nearly-Headless Nick, who greets you cheerfully and questions you as to why you’re up at such a time. “Can’t sleep,” you explain. “I’m checking if the elves have any midnight snacks for me.”
He chuckles, “An excellent reason but don’t stay up too late, or you’ll wind up like me!” He laughs hard at his joke and you can’t help but giggle, bidding him a goodnight as you descend into the basement.
You nearly run right into Theodore as you approach the kitchens. You jump at least a foot, clasping your hands over your chest. “Merlin’s beard, you scared me!”
“Could say the same for you,” he says. “Nice pajamas.”
You forgot you were in a tank top and shorts. You cross your arms and say, “You seem awfully fixated on my clothes, Nott.” You try to look as threatening as you can but the slight tremble to your body takes away any effect.
Theodore rolls his eyes and slides the robe he donned over his striped pajamas off, holding it out to you. When you don’t take it, he just throws it over your shoulders, the weight comfortable and warm. You say, “You keep popping up out of nowhere. Are you stalking me or something?”
He snorts, “You would never know if I was. But no, Mattheo’s snoring kept me up. I figured I should take advantage of my insomnia and grab some brownies from dessert.”
“Great minds think alike then,” you say.
You and Theodore walk down the corridor towards the kitchen when he asks, “Have you finished the book?”
“No, didn’t get a lot of reading done after you left.”
“Did I distract you that much?” He looks smug, smirking, and it’s your turn to roll your eyes.
“In your dreams.”
“Yeah,” he says. “When do you think you’ll finish?”
“Bloody hell, you’re impatient,” you groan, rubbing your temples. You’re not sure what possesses you, if it’s your sleep-deprived brain or something else but you suggest, “How about this? You grab brownies and cocoa for us and I’ll get the damn book and we’ll meet in the Clock Tower and read it together.”
Theodore considers it for a moment before he says, “Alright. I’ll meet you there in fifteen.”
“Perfect.” You scurry back to the Gryffindor dorms. Nearly-Headless Nick queries as to where your snacks are but you don’t answer, moving swiftly. You enter your dorm room, only pausing for a moment to catch your breath. Your heart is pounding but you can’t tell if it’s from the journey or from the thought of sitting alone in the Clock Tower with Theodore Nott. You don’t let yourself dwell on it and you pick up Romeo and Juliet and climb the stairs to the Clock Tower.
Theodore has beaten you there, already sitting up against the glass of the clock. The frost on the glass obstructs some of the moonbeams streaming in but it’s just enough light to read. In the moonlight, Theodore’s hair looks lighter and more burnt golden than brown. He takes a sip of his cocoa and holds out a ceramic mug to you as you settle next to him. You accept it gratefully, plucking a brownie from the plate between you two.
You flip through the play to find where you left off, the page dog-earred. Theodore makes a sound at the back of his throat. “What?”
“Don’t you have a bookmark or something?”
“No. Leave my marking choices out of it.”
He snickers and leans over you to get a better look at the text. Your shoulders brush and you’re all too aware that he smells of chocolate and sandalwood. His smell is clean and distinct; his robe smells like that too.
As you two begin to read, Theodore tells you to turn back or move forward. You eventually figure out a rhythm, knowing exactly when to do so. You’re about ten minutes into reading when you feel Theodore’s gaze on you. You remain still, wondering if he’ll stop but when he doesn’t you mumble, “Stop doing that.”
“Doing what?”
“Staring.”
“Does it bother you?”
“It feels like you can see into my soul.”
“You didn’t answer my question. Does it bother you?”
You pause. “I don’t… I don’t know.” A beat. “Why are you?”
“Why am I what?”
“Staring at me.”
His voice drops, somehow deeper than you have ever heard it. “Because I like to.”
Your head whips to him but no words leave your mouth. He regards you carefully and asks again, “Does that bother you?”
You hesitate. Then, “No, it doesn’t.”
He hums and you think he’ll do… something but he just ducks his head back down to read and you let out of the breath you didn’t know you were holding, disappointment pooling in your stomach. You don’t know what you wanted him to do. You don’t know why you’re disappointed.
You two read until your eyes grow heavy. You struggle to keep your lids open, head jolting up when you realize you’re drifting off. Theodore taps your shoulder and says, “We can stop here. Pick up another time.”
“Yeah,” you murmur, standing and stretching. You stifle a yawn and remember you have his robe on. You begin to take it off but he says, “Keep it. You can give it back tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?”
“Yeah, tomorrow. Same time, same place?”
“Okay.”
It doesn’t take you long to finish the play with Theodore only two days later. You noticed that Theodore read slower than before, telling you multiple times per session to go back a couple of pages.
Your eyes follow the last line: For never was a story of more woe / Than this of Juliet and her Romeo, and you close the book with a dull thump. You sit in silence with Theodore, listening to the clock hand turn to the next minute. You stay like that for a while. You sip on the spiced hot chocolate the house elves prepared for you. You share sugar cookies with Theodore that are shaped like snowflakes.
“So,” you start, breaking the silence, “this is your mother’s favorite book?”
He nods. “I think she read it a lot when her parents arranged for her to marry my father.”
“Oh.” You don’t know what else to say, adding lamely, “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.”
Silence.
“Can I ask you something?” you ask.
“Yeah.”
“Why did you stay here over break?”
He stiffens, expression unreadable. He glances over at you and finally sighs. “My father’s trial is happening right around now. My family doesn’t want any of the kids around this so…” He motions to the Clock Tower, adding, “My siblings are either at their own schools or with my grandmother.”
Your heart aches at the frown on his face and you bite the inside of your cheek, unsure of how to proceed. You’re thankful when Theodore moves on. “What about you?”
“Oh, my parents are on a sight-seeing cruise so they’re not home. I got a postcard today, though, they’re in Japan now.”
“I’ve never been. How’s it look?”
“Pretty. They said their tour guide told them the best time to come is when the cherry blossoms bloom. I would like to go.”
“We’ll go together then.”
He says it with a finality that makes you shy. “When?” is all you can ask.
“Someday.”
You haven’t seen Theodore in a couple of days, an odd thing to try and get used to when you’ve just adjusted to him popping up wherever you are. You assume that he’s done with you now that you finished Romeo and Juliet.
It all makes your heart sink.
You’re alone in the common room, wrapping up your gifts for your friends. You stack Harry’s scarf on top of Hermione’s mittens, Ron’s socks, and Ginny’s hat, and you lean against the couch with a huff.
You think about the spare red yarn sitting in your room. You think there’s just enough to make another scarf.
Theodore’s face flashes in your mind’s eye and you run a hand down your face in frustration. Whatever weird thing you had with Theodore is over. He’s probably out with Mattheo at the Three Broomsticks or something. You’ve seen them there before along with Enzo, Blaise, Draco, and Pansy as well as just with each other, usually flirting with girls there.
You didn’t used to think much of it — just scoffed along with Ron and Hermione — but now the thought makes your stomach churn.
You think about the extra yarn in your room again and you almost can’t believe that, despite his disappearing act, you’ve decided you’ll knit a scarf for Theodore Nott.
Almost.
You’re greeted with a delicious Sunday roast for dinner on Christmas Eve: tender roasted beef, warm Yorkshire puddings, fluffy mashed potatoes, and a side of jus from the beef. You sit by yourself once again, the loneliness threatening to swallow you whole as you plate your dinner.
Theodore seats himself right across from you and places a parcel wrapped in brown paper in front of you. You look at it in confusion and he says, “Open it.”
“What is it?”
“Christmas present.”
You raise a brow. “You got me a present?”
“Yes, now open it.”
“Shouldn’t I wait until tom—” The sharp look he gives you makes you set your fork aside and tug on the string of the bow. There are two books inside. The first is a copy of Shakespeare’s Macbeth, similarly leather-bound like Romeo and Juliet, and the second one is an ornately-decorated collector’s edition of Romeo and Juliet.
Your jaw falls open and you whisper, “Theodore…”
He says, “Figured that we can read Macbeth together. It’s a personal favorite of mine.”
Your fingers trace the golden embossment of Romeo and Juliet, swooping down to follow the curve of the ‘J.’ “Where did you even get this?”
“Sent a lot of letters and had Mattheo help me pull strings at Flourish and Blotts.”
Your face is on fire but you grin at Theodore and say, “Thank you so much.”
“Happy Christmas,” he says and you catch the pink at the tips of his ears.
“I actually have something for you too,” you say and his eyebrows shoot up in surprise. “I’ll get it to you after dinner.”
“I’ll come with,” he says and you nod. You wonder if he’ll get up but he stays put, taking a plate and serving himself dinner.
You two talk quietly in between bites and something dawns on you halfway through. “Where’s Mattheo?” You look over your shoulder and can’t find the other Slytherin boy.
Theodore smirks. “Might’ve slipped him a couple of galleons to leave us alone.” Your cheeks heat pleasantly.
You two finish dinner after that and Theodore walks you to the Fat Lady’s portrait. She eyes him suspiciously, glaring at you. “You know students from other Houses aren’t permitted in the Gryffindor dorm.”
You disregard her and give her the password. Begrudgingly and with one last glower at you and Theodore, the portrait swings open and you step inside. Theodore peers around the common room and says, “Never been in here before.”
“Some Gryffindor girl hasn’t taken you back with her?” you ask but you instantly regret your teasing words. The thought of Theodore with someone else (Lavender Brown comes to mind and you scowl internally) makes you queasy.
“Can’t say that it’s happened,” he says, shooting you a cocky smirk. “You’d be the first.”
“I’m honored. Wait right here.”
Theodore flops on the couch and sighs in satisfaction. “So much more comfortable than Slytherin’s.”
“Yeah?” you ask as you retreat up the stairs. He shouts after you that Slytherin’s couches, while not wholly terrible, are stiff whereas your common room’s are plush and cushy.
Theodore’s scarf, knit in a red cashmere, lays innocuously on your bed. You’re abruptly self-conscious of it; Theodore got you two beautiful and likely expensive books and you knit him a measly scarf in colors that aren’t his House’s.
Merlin, you think, what if he hates it? Only one way to find out, you suppose. With a deep breath, you pick it up and hide it behind your back. You peek into the common room, where Theodore lounges on the couch, his figure long and relaxed. His shirt has ridden up a little and you spy a sliver of the toned muscle of his stomach.
“Close your eyes,” you say. You watch his eyes shut, unfairly long lashes brushing his cheekbone. You creep into the room, halting in front of him. The flames dancing in the fireplace are the only excuse you can come up with for why you’re so warm. “Hold out your hands.”
He sits up straight and does as he’s told. You say, “It’s not wrapped.”
“That’s alright.”
You inhale, exhale, and gingerly place the scarf in his hands. He opens his eyes and inspects the scarf, rubbing the knit yarn in between his fingers. You hold your breath.
His face breaks into the biggest grin you’ve ever seen on him. He looks—
He looks beautiful. He’s always handsome, yes, but he’s beautiful here.
“This is really nice. You make it yourself?”
You hum in affirmation and he loops it around his neck, standing and spinning around playfully. “How do I look?”
“I think red’s definitely your color,” you tell him, your own cheeks hurting from how widely you’re beaming.
Theodore takes a step closer, his shoes nearly knocking into yours. The glee in his expression morphs slowly into something different. It’s not anything bad, but it’s somehow more intense and softer than before. “Thank you,” he says.
“You’re welcome. Thank you again for the books.”
“You’re welcome.”
The fireplace crackles, embers spitting.
You’re not sure who moves first. Your mouths crash against each other like waves against a bluff, all lips and teeth and tongue. Your hands are everywhere, in his hair, clutching his shoulders, cupping his face. His hands are just as frantic, grabbing at your waist and hips, squeezing you tight against him.
You two come up for air but you don’t surface for long. Despite the way he’s worked up, he’s careful in unwinding the scarf from his neck and draping it over a nearby arm chair. Then, he’s on you again, pulling you flush against him.
He guides you to his lap as he sits back on the couch, lips never leaving yours. You straddle his thighs, tugging lighty at his curls. He moans into your mouth. Your hips move against his. His fingers, long and cold, creep under your shirt and send a shiver down your spine.
His mouth only leaves yours to latch onto your neck, sucking and licking and nipping. You whine and push yourself against him harder, your hands clumsily trying to undo the buttons of his shirt. He helps you, flinging it off his shoulders, and pulling your own off your torso.
“Fuck,” he groans, chest heaving as he takes in the view of you. He’s staring at you like you’re some sort of goddess. “Fuck, you’re beautiful, amorina.”
You melt under his gaze. His ocean blue eyes are a little glazed and his mouth is kiss-swollen and ajar. Godric, he’s one to talk. You lean in closer, tracing his jaw and letting your hand trail down his neck, his chest, down to his stomach. You graze the top of his trousers and lightly scrap your nails over the skin just above. He hisses, hips bucking, and before you can say anything to him, he’s yanking you down for a kiss.
It’s slower, no less passionate but less frenzied, and you only break apart to whisper, “Bedroom, Nott.”
He doesn’t say another word, springing from the couch, grabbing the scarf you made him, and dragging you up to your dorm. As soon as he’s inside, he sets the scarf on your bedside table and pushes you down onto the mattress, climbing on after you.
You squeal as he peppers kisses along your neck. “Theo,” he murmurs against the skin of your collarbone. “Call me Theo.”
“Okay,” you say, testing it out. “Theo.” His hips slot against yours once more and you cant your up. He slips a hand down your pants and when he presses his palm against you, you whine, “Theo!”
Another rumbling moan, “Amorina, you don’t know what you do to me.” Another long, hard kiss. Your hands move to unbutton his trousers.
You don’t care how sweaty and sticky you are as you lay panting against Theo’s chest, feeling the way it rises and falls in rapid succession. You listen to his racing heartbeat and he places a sweet kiss to the top of your head.
As you two catch your breath, Theo says, “I think Juliet should have gone with Benvolio.”
You look at him like he’s crazy. “That’s really what you’re thinking about?”
He winks at you. “Of course not. I’ve been thinking about it since we finished the book.”
You slap his chest playfully and ask the obvious question: “Why do you think so?”
“Well, you said I’m like Benvolio and I told you you remind me of Juliet.”
“Huh?” You think for a couple of seconds and then it clicks. “Oh!” You take in Theo’s half-lidded eyes staring at you. “Oh…”
He dips down to kiss you again.
Over the break, you’ve expanded on what you know about Theodore Nott. One, he’s quiet because he’s thoughtful, always observing, always analyzing, and storing away information for whatever purpose he’d like to use it for.
Two, he’s whip-sharp — you see it in the way he can quote Shakespeare plays like second-nature; in how he easily banters with you, always coming back with a swift reply and a cheeky smile.
Lastly, he’s unbelievably handsome. You knew this before but it’s different now. You admire the way he holds himself with an unflagging confidence, how he has these rare full-bellied laughs that make you crave the sound. But you think he’s most handsome when you sit together, cloistered away in the Clock Tower, reading Romeo and Juliet and now Macbeth together. You’re so close, you can smell the peppermint on his breath from the candy canes the house elves snuck you. You can see all the shades of blue in his eyes. You can count the beauty marks on his face.
This close, you can lean over and kiss him and delight in the way your heart thrums when he reciprocates, cradling your face and coaxing you into him.
You spend the majority of the rest of the break wrapped up in Theo’s arms. By the last day, you’re sure you have snuck each other into your dorms more times than either of you can count. You hang out a few times with Mattheo, who turns out to be not as bad as your friends make him out to be. He’s sharp and quick-witted like Theo with a tendency towards the dramatics that makes you laugh.
You’re sitting at the same spot underneath the tree at the Black Lake, Theo relaxing between your legs. He’s swaddled in the same black overcoat you saw him in before, only this time, the red scarf you knit is starkly bright against the coat. You card your fingers through his soft curls, ducking to peck his forehead. He tilts his head upwards and smiles boyishly at you and it makes you giggle, planting a kiss on his mouth. He brings your hand down to his lips, kissing each fingertip.
You relish the quiet with him, knowing that tomorrow will be a flurry of activity with students and faculty returning from winter holiday. It makes you sigh, the thought of leaving the little world you and Theo have created. Your relationship is only a couple of days old and you can’t deny that you’re anxious about your friends coming back.
As if sensing your nervousness, Theo sits up and spins around to face you. You attempt to plaster on a reassuring smile but it’s wobbly and uneasy. He cradles your face with one hand, thumb stroking your cheekbone. “What’s wrong, cara mia?”
“I don’t know,” you mumble. He tilts his head, raising an eyebrow with an expression that tells you he knows you’re lying. “What are we going to do when everyone comes back?”
“What do you mean?”
“Theo, our friends all despise each other.”
He replies, “So? Just because they don’t like each other doesn’t mean we can’t.” He kisses the back of your hand. “And I happen to like you very much.”
You smile weakly at him. “I know, and I like you very much as well. It’s just…” You can picture the dawning horror on Ron’s face and the grimaces on Hermione and Harry’s.
Theo’s mouth turns downward and he asks, “Why do you care what they think?”
“Don’t you care what your friends think?”
“No,” he says firmly, adding, “Plus, Mattheo likes you so who’s to say everyone else won’t?”
“Theo…”
He repeats, “Why do you care?”
“I just don’t want anything to ruin this, ruin us.”
“They can only ruin it if we let them and we won’t.”
“You don’t know that for sure! We’re still in the early stages of our relationship.”
“Do you not have faith that we’ll stay together?” he asks.
“I do! It’s—” You sigh in frustration, brow furrowed. “I just want to preserve what we have without outside influence. Please, can we just wait a little to tell everyone?”
You wish you didn’t see the way Theo’s expression falters, hurt passing across briefly before he wipes it away. He’s studying your face, eyes dark and unreadable but he nods. “Fine. But you have to promise me that it’s just for a little while.”
“I promise.”
“Alright. I’ll tell Mattheo not to open his big mouth.”
“Thank you, Theo,” you say. This time, you reach for his hand and peck his knuckles. His shoulders lose their tension and he bends towards you, mouth ghosting against your neck. You squeal and giggle and you feel him smile against your skin.
author's note: at long last, the theo nott fic i teased months ago... this fic was supposed to be a lot longer but i when i went back to college and hit a major writer's block, it just languished. i'm proud of what i've written, which is why i want to post it, but please excuse the kind of abrupt end. there is a potential continuation in the future <3
#theodore nott x reader#theo nott x reader#theodore nott#theo nott#theodore nott fic#theodore nott imagine#theodore nott scenarios#theo nott imagine#theodore nott x you#✶ nove writes
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Bodyswap With The Dormheads
I can't help but imagine the Prefect swapping bodies with the other dormheads...
Riddle, who is definitely struggling without his magic, and constantly trying to behead Grim. Meanwhile you'll definitely behead Ace at some point, maybe levy your power to try to make Crowley do his job for once.
Leona's suddenly stuck being poor and dependent on the headmage. Not a fun experience, to say the least. He'll come out of it with a newfound respect for you. And you'll get food! And Ruggie... Who's definitely gonna clock something's off.
Azul can't sigma male grind his way out of this one, I'm afraid. Back in that helpless position he was in before, only now it seems like he can't work his way out. It'll definitely be miserable, and he'll have quite a few spats with Grim. And you? Well, you'll get clocked by the Leech twins before you know it, I'm afraid.
Kalim flounders completely. He's kind, and wise in some ways, yes, but his circumstances mean he's never learned a lot of basic tasks. So having to take care of both himself and Grim in this unfamiliar place... well, it's pretty hard. He probably almost burned the dorm at some point. Meanwhile, you get more food, and Jamil's ire. There's a pretty good chance Jamil clocks you, but he also might just not care so long as nothing happens that he has to take the blame for. Afterwards, Kalim will definitely offer more in renovations, like he did after VDC.
Vil is appalled by the state of your dorm. He doesn't blame you, of course, you can't help the fact that the headmage is too incompetent to properly care for his students. Afterwards, expect him to try and help you with skincare and renovations more. He always wants to help people be their most beautiful, does he not? And you? Well... You'll quickly be met with the brunt of his self-imposed workload.
Idia's social battery is completely drained. He can't use his tablet anymore? And what's with all these normies? Why are they making fun of you for not having magic? And not to mention the terrible state of your dorm... Hey, at least he gets a cute kitty-cat to hang out with as consolation. And you, well, you appreciate the break from being bullied. Even if Ortho probably clocks you in an instant.
Malleus is rather shocked by your poor living conditions. How could you be treated so poorly? Are you not a student of this school? He really is rather confused. Your friends are rather fascinating though... Along with that little cat - no, monster of yours. And you get a powerful fae body, yay! But everyone fears you. Hey, is it really that much worse than dealing with mockery?
#twisted wonderland#Riddle Rosehearts#Leona Kingscholar#azul ashengrotto#Kalim al-asim#vil Schoenheit#Idia Shroud#Malleus Draconia#azul ashengrotto x reader#riddle rosehearts x reader#Leona Kingscholar x reader#Kalim al-asim x reader#Vil Schoenheit x reader#Idia Shroud x reader#Malleus Draconia x reader
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May I request BootHill and Argenti with a crush who’s reckless and accidentally confessed due to a particularly bad injury?
Crush doesn’t care for getting injured at all and always brushes off their concerns when they get injured but one day they just get rlly badly hurt and when they try to do the usual
“I’m okay”
It just kinda snaps in the boys?
(Sorry if this is too much)
Boothill
‘You fudging idiot!’ Boothill screamed when he saw the massive gash on your side. ‘You’ve gone and gotten yourself hurt again!’
‘I’m okay.’ You said as casually as you could while trying not to wince as Boothill began to put pressure on your wound to prevent it from bleeding out further. The gash fucking killed but you weren’t about to let him know how much it hurt, you refused to as you’ve dealt with far worse.
You haven’t, actually, that was a fucking lie to begin with.
‘I’m okay’ they say.’ Boothill scoffs, ‘yeah right, you’ve only gone and done it now! For fork’s sake would it kill you to actually act like you want to fudging live for once?!’
He knew you were a reckless spirit for the moment you first met, you were someone who didn’t care how many scars would litter your skin, only caring about finishing the mission no matter how debilitating the pain was. At first he didn’t care to know your name nor your reasoning as to why you act the way you did, but when he started to feel something for you, that’s when he began to worry himself sick over you.
Boothill genuinely wondered whether or not you cared that you lived after each and every suicide mission, you couldn’t be mended or rebuilt like he could, you weren’t invincible as you’d like to this you were and Boothill could only hope that today served as a reminder of that.
Boothill didn’t want to lose you, he couldn’t bare it as he’s already lost his friends, family and his darling Arabella who’s smile so wide you could see the her gap tooth on full display. Arabella was just learning to walk when she was taken from him along with everyone else who meant everything to him; Revenge was his only motive and loosing you would only make him surrender to it a hell of lot faster.
‘If all you’re going to do is shout about how stupid I am then you can fuck off and leave me here to die since I’m such a idiot in your eyes, mr spaghetti western.’ You barked, hating Boothill’s unnecessary comments and hating the worried look within his eyes even more, it made you feel useless and pathetic.
Boothill looked at you as though you’ve grown a second head, lost on how that was the conclusion you came to, you must be delirious from the blood loss. ‘Fork me do I have to spell it out for you- I like you fudging dummy!’ He exclaimed. ‘I’m mad not because I hate you but because you’re hurt and I’m scared of loosing you darling!’ He chuckled humourlessly as he presses his forehead against yours, the one time where he was glad that his face was the last places where he could feel your warmth seep into him. ‘Your recklessness has me on the edge of insanity more than once sweetheart. I mean do you know just how much it hurt to see you like this? I might as well have gone on a tirade and hunt down every son of a nice lady who played a part in your scars.’
You remained in stunned silence.
This confession wasn’t something you were expecting from someone like Boothill, it made you wonder whether you were imaging this for yourself, and the reality was that he wasn’t actually here with you and you were indeed dying alone with no one to provide you company other then dead corpses waiting for you to join them. So in hopes of proving yourself wrong, you lifted a hand to his cheek, watched as he melted against it, his warmth seeping into your skin.
He was here.
Boothill was here and this was real, all this was real.
‘I like you too your silly cowboy.’ You whispered before pressing a tender kiss to his plush lips. A battlefield wasn’t a great place for a confession nor for love to blossom but if that was the case then why did it feel so right for the both of you in that moment.
Later you were taken to medical and Boothill, your official partner, went back to talking your ear off about how reckless you were, but would press kisses to your forehead and hands to let you know that he’ll take care of you from now on.
Argenti hated it whenever you came back from missions injured and your carelessness towards the scrapes and bruises that littered your body didn’t exactly help either.
‘I’m fine.’ You said after spraining an ankle.
‘I’ll live.’ You waved him off dismissively after hurting your side during a mission.
It seemed as though you never held yourself in the same regard as he did, and Argenti couldn’t help but feel his heart break the more and more he witness you disregard other people’s concern, acting though you had a paper cut rather then a wound that wound take you out of action for a good couple of weeks.
So when he found you with your back pressed up against a wall and a deep gash on your leg that made it hard for you to stand never less walk.
‘My beloved rose!’ He cried as he rushed to your side, setting aside his weapon as he inspected the wound.
‘I’m okay, it’s only a small gash.’ You told him but Argenti wasn’t about to hear it, not this time. He wasn’t going to allow you the chance to dismiss him when you were severely injured. So when he levelled you with a stare, you began to wish you could take back your words as seeing such a stern expression on a man as beautiful as Argenti was actually downright terrifying. ‘This is vastly different than a small gash, this is a serious injury that could alter your life’s trajectory for good if we treat it with such disregard as you have done with previous injuries.’ He told you with a seriousness that had you listen to him.
‘And why do you care?’ You asked.
‘I’ve always cared.’ Argenti replied straightforward, ‘every injury I’ve cared. I worried for your health, your well-being, both physical and mental, but you don’t seem to do the same and that pains me because you are so-‘
‘-reckless?’ You cut in, having heard the same thing from pretty much everyone and believing Argenti would be no different from them.
‘-beautiful.’ Argenti said and your breath caught in your throat. ‘You are so beautiful to me, my rose. I have found myself grown quite fond of you in a short amount of time that any pain caused to you might as well be my own.’ He finished as he saw the conflicting emotions within your eyes and prays that you could find the truth within his words.
‘Why?’ You asked. ‘What would a knight of beauty want with a reckless idiot like me?’
Argenti smiled softly. ‘You may be reckless but you are far from an idiot my dear, I like you a lot and I merely say this in fear of a future where I may never get the chance to do so for multiple reasons. Whether or not you accept is solely up to you.’ Argenti felt as though he had finally gotten a heavy weight off of his chest, but felt a pinch of anxiety when you didn’t respond after a period of time, and began to wonder whether this was a smart move on his behalf.
‘I always dreamed of having a knight in shining armour.’ You admitted, raising a hand to cup the back of his head. ‘But I didn’t think that dream would come true until you came along and I knew in that moment I would give you my heart and so much more.’ Argenti breathes a sigh of relief as he rests his forehead against your own, nuzzling your noses together briefly. ‘I’d be more than honoured of being your knight, if you’ll let me.’
You chuckled as you looked at him fondly. ‘I’d be more than happy to my cherry haired beauty.’ You replied as Argenti was quick to scoop you in his arms and carried you to the medics, who told you that you’d be out of action for quite a while and Argenti was more then happy to be your caregiver during that time, you couldn’t be more happier at the opportunity of being with your knight in shining armour.
#honkai star rail x reader#hsr x reader#hsr imagines#hsr imagine#hsr boothill x reader#hsr argenti x reader#honkai star rail#honkai star rail imagines#honkai star rail imagine#boothill x reader#boothill x you#boothill imagine#boothill imagines#argenti x reader#argenti x you#Argenti imagines#Argenti imagine
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hiii!!<3 if you’re thinking abt writing for joost, can u pls write some thing abt an established relationship fic based off the song birds of a feather by billie eilish if u can! love ur writing!
Hi anon! thank you sm for the request <33 this song is so sweeeet omg!!! also... technically an established relationship, but i do recap how reader and joost met :-)
Birds of a Feather | Joost Klein
description: gn!reader reflects on all the special moments in your and Joost's relationship following an unexpected proposal.
content: so insanely cheesey! sorry! pure fluff! + lots of crying (mostly happy tears) literally the most tiny smallest sexual reference
word count: 2426 (this was supposed to be under 1k words but i got soooo carried away)
/I don't know what I'm crying for / I don't think I could love you more/
Shaky fingers fiddle with the cold metal looped around your ring finger. Your hand flexes outward, watching as the light from your window reflects onto the small stone. Something warm rolls down your cheek- a solitary teardrop, caressing the skin of your face. Your hand reaches up to wipe away the tear, but it's too late, you can feel more welling up near your waterline, any sudden movement now would send tears streaming down your face. You look up, your eyelids brink rapidly in an attempt to prevent the inevitable waterworks.
You hadn't seen an engagement coming- in all the years you'd been together, it still seemed like a milestone that had felt so far away. Until Yesterday.
You and Joost had been nearly inseparable since just about the moment you had met- A nervous 20-year-old studying abroad in the Netherlands for your second to last semester of university. You sat on the stairs outside of the apartment building that stood as your temporary housing for the semester, on the brink of tears, your randomly assigned roommate had been a real piece of work. You were on your third argument that week alone, and, saying you were fed up was an understatement. You contemplated at that moment packing your things and just going back home.
"Gaat het?" (Are you ok?) A voice calls out, a goofy-looking blonde standing at the bottom of the stairs. He looks vaguely familiar, you think you may have seen him in the elevator of your apartment once or twice.
You furrow your eyebrows at him, "Ik spreek niet veel Nederlands," Using one of the few Dutch phrases you knew to tell him you don't speak Dutch. You shake your head, kind of hoping he would get lost, not wanting to be bothered.
"Ah," He nods, "Do you speak English?"
You stare at him for a moment, unsure if you should lie, after all he was a stranger but something is telling you to tell him the truth.
"Yeah," You sniffle, attempting to remove any emotion from your face.
"Are you okay?" He asks again, this time you understand.
"I'm fine," You weren't exactly searching for a deep conversation about your current struggles in someone you didn't know.
"People who are fine don't usually sit outside their apartment building crying."
You bite your lip, contemplating engaging the kind stranger in what was ailing you at the moment. You sigh, having a feeling he would probably keep pestering you if you continued to insist you were feeling in a way you actually weren't.
"It's just my roommate-"
Two months after your first encounter with the blonde man at the bottom of the stairs, you were standing in front of a mirror, doing a final check of your outfit before going on your first date. You had learned his name was Joost, he was 21, and lived in an apartment two floors above you.
He was unimaginably kind, with a wit unparalleled by anyone you'd ever met before, and truthfully, he was very cute- so when he had initially asked you out, you couldn't get a "yes" out fast enough.
It seemed a little inconvenient, given that you only had one more month left in the Netherlands- but he knew this, and didn't necessarily seem like he had been looking for anything too serious. Besides, it would be nice for you to have a good connection with someone outside of the people you saw in your classes.
There's a knock at the door, and your feet are quick to start shuffling under you, you're practically running to go open it.
You stop for a moment as you get to the door, letting a deep breath fill your lungs to capacity, before letting it out, whipping the door open as you do so.
Joost is standing behind it, a smile plastered on his face, hands behind his back. He's dressed up, now that you thought about it, you never really saw him in anything other than a sweatshirt or t-shirt and some jeans. It was a pleasant change- a white button-up shirt and some dress pants even if both articles of clothing had been obviously wrinkled.
"Hey," He greets, removing his hands from where they rest behind him, revealing a bouquet of flowers in an outstretched arm, "These are for you- I didn't know what kind of flowers you liked so I sort of just guessed." He's unsure of himself, in an entirely endearing way. He was trying.
"For me?" You grin, "Aww, Joost!" You take the flowers from his hands, "Let me go find something to put these in."
A month later you're sitting on Joost's couch after what you assumed would be your last date together. Your study abroad program was ending in three days, and you'd be returning back home.
There is an air of sadness that surrounds you, one that you hadn't expected to feel- you'd only known the man for three months, yet somehow it felt like you were leaving someone you had known your whole life.
Gentle fingers grab onto your jaw, Joost is turning your head to force you to look at him.
"You know," He starts, "I've really been enjoying our time together."
"Me too," You agree, a small smile peaking onto your face, you try not to give way to the sadness you were feeling.
"And," He says, "Y/n, I really like you, and I think if I don't ask you now, I'm never going to get the chance to ever again."
"What?" You perk up, your heart suddenly beating much faster, your breathing quickens, unsure of what he's going to say next.
"Well- I- what I'm trying to say is, do you want to go out with me? Like- officially- like dating." His voice is trembling, you'd never seen him so anxious before.
"Joost I-" You sigh, the reality of your situation crashing into you harder than it had before, "I'm leaving soon- we'll be hours away, when am I going to see y-"
You're cut off by Joost's lips crashing into yours, your thoughts suddenly disappearing the second your lips connect. You're entirely overwhelmed with emotion, every wire in your brain is fried, this move was an utter surprise, up until this point your relationship had been entirely chaste; the furthest you'd gone was sharing a hug at the end of your dates. Still, you kiss him back, your hand finding its way to his shoulder, tugging at it, begging him to come closer to you.
It had been seven and a half months since you had last seen Joost, but the two of you had talked at length each and every day during that time. By now, you had finished your degree in University and were ready to really start your life.
You could remember the cheer of excitement on the other end of the phone when you told Joost after a month of job hunting you had secured a job in the Netherlands.
"Does that mean you're coming back here?"
"Yeah, the job starts at the end of next month ."
A month and a half didn't necessarily give you much time to plan things out to the extent you would have liked, but Joost was more than ready and willing to help you out.
He had posited moving into his apartment- but the suggestion while sweet- was quickly thrown out. It wouldn't have been an ideal commute to your new job.
So the two of you got on to looking elsewhere, he had been kind enough to take the time out of his days to go to apartment showings for you near where you'd be taking your job, keeping you on Facetime as he viewed the places.
Eventually, you had found one you absolutely fell in love with, in perfect distance from the job. The problem had been- it was quite a ways out of your budget. You were heartbroken, it had basically been your dream apartment.
Joost, always swift with solving problems, suggested that the two of you move into the apartment together, that way he could cover the rest of the rent that you couldn't afford. And while you were over the moon about his offer- you worried about what living together would do to your relationship, the two of you had known each other for less than a year- would living together be such a great idea?
But as you're standing in the doorway of your bedroom on the first night being in your new apartment, staring up at Joost, who's leaning against the door frame- you just know you made the right decision.
A careful hand glides across your cheek, resting at the back of your neck,
"Thank you for coming back," Joost muses, gently massaging the spot where his hand resides. You lean into his touch,
"There was no other option" There's an undeniable twinkle in your eyes, admiring the man who stood above you, tired and messy from a long day of moving.
"I've been waiting to tell you this in person," His grip on your neck suddenly becomes still, rigid, "And- even if you don't feel the same yet, I just wanted to say that I love you." He's talking fast, simpering after he finishes his short words before resuming the gentle massaging motion of his thumb against your neck.
The breath is almost entirely knocked out of you- he loves you.
The words just about run out of your mouth, "I love you too,"
"You do?" His pupils are blown wide, "You love me too?"
You nod fervently, never having meant a statement so immensely in your life.
Joost is leaning down now, his head tilted so his lips can perfectly interlock with yours. It is possibly the hungriest kiss the two of you had ever shared, with the obvious implication of love now behind it. If Joost hadn't snaked his free arm around your back, you probably would have fallen straight to the ground, your legs tingling with excitement.
He pulls away, looking into your mostly empty bedroom, a smirk appearing on his face,
"What do you say we christen that bed I spent all day putting together?"
Five years later you're still living in that same apartment, the once-empty space now fully decorated with beautiful memories.
And now, the most crystal-clear memory sparkled in your brain, almost as bright as the ring itself. You'd been crying in intervals since then- since it happened since - You replayed it in your head.
"Do you remember when we first met?" Joost's fingers interlock with yours as the two of you walk down a familiar street- You were unsure of why Joost had insisted on taking you here, to the town where you both had lived when you met.
"How could I ever forget?" You grin, "Feels like just yesterday I was crying to some strange Dutch boy about my roommate issues."
"And how you told me, you never wanted to see the Netherlands again?" His words are slow as he looks deeply into your eyes, glimmers of adoration shining from every feature on his face.
"God, I was so dramatic- wasn't I?" You look away from him, scoffing as you look down at the pavement, thinking about your old self, looking back on it- it was a stupid decision to let one person ruin almost two months of your life, but back then it seemed like the biggest deal in the world. "Funny" You shrug, "The decision I made to talk to you on the day I was most certain I was just going to pack up and leave forever led me to making the Netherlands my home." You shake your head, "I don't know what would have happened if I hadn't met you on that day, but I don't think there's a reality that exists where we aren't together."
"Don't make me cry," He chuckles.
"I mean- I don't mean to be all sappy, but it's true- if soulmates are real, I can guarantee you're mine."
He's grinning now, you'd been so lost in your thoughts you barely noticed where the two of you had ended up, back at your old apartment, right in front of those very steps the two of you had met on.
He's pulling you up the stairs, and needless to say you're confused about this trip down memory lane.
"I think it's only appropriate that I do this here," His voice is low, and he's blinking more rapidly than usual. His hand slips from yours, and falls into his pocket- you watch anxiously for his next move. There's something in his hand now, and he's slowly bending down onto one knee.
The tears start nearly immediately, before he says a single word, you're cupping your mouth with your hand
"Y/n," He looks up at you, through the lenses of his glasses you can see there are tears in his eyes too, "Wil je met me trouwen?" (will you marry me)
"Joost," You choke out a sob- "Yes, Yes!" Your whole body is full of a tingling sensation, and your heart feels like it occupies more space in your chest than it did before, swelling with an overwhelming amount of love.
Joost grabs your trembling hand, caressing it tenderly with his thumb before slipping on the ring. You let him hold your hand for a moment more before you're pulling it away, desperate to see. You outstretch your hand in front of you, looking at the glimmering stone that sits on your finger. A visual confirmation of what had just happened.
He's barely stood all the way up before you're reaching for him, knocking into him with an embrace so energetically that it nearly knocks him over. As he catches his balance he wraps his arms right back around you, pulling you into him.
If you were to have gotten any closer, the atoms that make up each of your bodies may have actually fused together. Though you wish you could, despite how you fully braced Joost's body it doesn't feel like enough you want him closer to you.
Still, you're so warm in his tight embrace, letting out choked tears of joy against his chest.
A gentle kiss falls on the top of your head, followed by your favorite words to hear out of Joost's mouth, "Ik hou van jou." (I love you)
You shut your eyes, basking in the moment, you could absolutely get used to hearing those words every day for the rest of your life.
/I'll love you 'til the day that I die / 'Til the light leaves my eyes/
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maintaining/creating a social life⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🧁
ok so i used to have HORRIBLE social anxiety and i think that the contrast between me with social anxiety and me now is INSANE. in a good way ofc. so im not going to talk about how i overcame social anxiety, instead im going to talk about how i created a social life ✨
MAKING FRIENDS ;
the science of making friends is simple and im about to explain it. so go to where there are ppl that u can relate to/want to relate to. example being school, clubs, etc.
next, observe who u want to befriend and make sure to start with a compliment. starting off by introducing urself just makes for an awkward conversation but starting with a compliment puts u and the other party at ease.
something thats rly important is ur CHARISMA and ur magnetic energy so be CHARMING ✨ if u find that the other party is not reciprocating its either they're uncomfy, uninterested, or just a weirdo. and in all cases, you should stop.
MAKING FRIENDS THRU FRIENDS ;
make friends with your friends friends -> make friends with their friends -> and so on and so forth. this is how you network and create a friendly status with lots of people.
if ur in a school setting like i am, make friends with people in ur own grade or in a higher up grade, i dont usually make friends with ppl in lower grades but ofc there are always exceptions.
making friends through friends is how u get invited to parties, have more opportunities be available to you, and ofc network for more connections. guys connections are literally EVERYTHING.
MAKE TIME FOR UR FRIENDS ;
make sure to learn who u call friends. when is their birthday? do they have specific preferences? what kind of music do they listen to? knowing ur friends makes them feel special and thats how u learn to be a good friend. i can make a whole POST about being a good friend cuz i've learned and grown so much with that.
THE POWER OF A COMPLIMENT ;
make it ur mission to give a compliment everyday cuz first off, being nice is HOT so pls be nice and second of all, if ur trying to talk to someone and u start with a compliment i promise that it'll go so much better.
if ur thinking "thats so awkward how will i do that" then the category dont be shy is one that u gotta read cuz girl 💀. if u need an example i'll provide one from my own experience so u can see the power of a compliment.
there was this girl in my spanish class and i always thought that she was so pretty and she seemed so nice. one day we bump into each other in the bathroom and i compliment her hair and makeup, she responds well. we continue to have friendly interactions throughout the rest of the school year and now we are good friends on and off campus.
DONT BE SHY ;
when u make friends please please PLEASE work on ur confidence first. you need to be SURE of yourself. if not, when ur being friendly it could come off as desperation and ppl will humiliate, make fun of and take advantage of u. and thats NOT hot.
be CONFIDENT, you literally have nothing to lose. when u shed ur shyness (thru things like exposure therapy etc) a whole new world is opened up for u bcuz sometimes the only thing holding u back is urself and ur limiting beliefs about urself.
MAKE UR PERSONALITY SHINE ;
make sure that know ur own personality and from knowing that u can find ways in which u can make it shine. no matter what ur personality is though, something that i cannot stress enough is BE NICE.
be friendly and amicable with everyone and stay out of drama and if drama comes to you then stay unbothered 😭. dont try and uproot ur own personality to copy someone else's.
#honeytonedhottie⭐️#becoming that girl#it girl#self care#self love#that girl#it girl energy#advice#girlhood#dream girl#dream girl tips#dream life#friendship#social life#social butterfly#princess#hyper femininity#hyper feminine#doll#self improvement#self growth#self development#being a good friend#be nice#self concept#confidence#confidence tips#self confidence
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how can i start writing more often?
That's going to depend what's stopping you from doing so. I'll tackle some of the common ones and see if that helps you out.
You're working or going to school full time or otherwise have a lot of responsibilities that fill your days
Writing doesn't have to be done in large chunks of time. You can write for ten minutes and still get something onto the page. You can also write by dictating a voice note into your phone and using speech-to-text to transcribe it. When you have a day off or a larger amount of downtime, try to block off some of it for writing or for editing those speech-to-text transcripts into a more polished story.
You don't have any ideas
Seek you writing prompt blogs. Make a post on your tumblr asking for requests. Expand the type of idea you're willing to write - not everything needs to be a 100K multichap, so think of a oneshot idea and write that instead.
Every time you think about posting a fic, you get so anxious you just stop writing
Write something that you're not planning to post. Write something by hand so that you can't post it without making the decision to transcribe it and post it later. Focus on the writing instead of the possible audience reactions to the writing.
You have an idea you love, but writing all of the backstory to get you to that point is so demotivating you can't even start
Make a bulleted list of all of the backstory components that need to be in place before you can get to the part of the story you want to write. Now write the part you're actually interested in. After you write that, check in with that bulleted list and see if any of those parts are more interesting now. If they are, write those too. If they're not, you're done and can move onto the next story. You can post those criteria as your summary or author's note or tags.
You have an idea you love, but all of the research you have to do first is so demotivating you can't even start
Do you actually need to do the research? Can you write the story in a way that hand-waves things (bring in some pseudo-science or a Fantasy Costco or something to get around what you're trying to figure out). Is there someone else who has done this research already? Do you know someone who loves researching that you could get to help you out? Is the research just an excuse for procrastination because the idea isn't fully baked yet?
You spend so much time researching that by the time you're ready to start writing you don't have any time left
Do you enjoy researching more than writing? Is there someone you can partner with to write the story based on your idea and research? Do you tend to research and write in the same block of time? In that case, separate those activities out. Research until you get to a good stopping point and then write until you run out of research and need to learn more.
Every time you start writing, someone interrupts you
If the interruptions come via social media or other online means, mute your notifications while you're writing. Change your status from online to do not disturb. If the interruptions are IRL, have a conversation with your family or roommates and work out an agreement where you can get blocks of time without interruptions or where you can put up a signal that you're writing and can't be disturbed. Get a whiteboard or sticky notes or something so that people can write down what they need from you and you can check it when you're done.
Every time you try to write, you get distracted by a bunch of other things and can't actually get much writing done
If you write on a device that connects to the internet, you can get really distracted by the internet. There are lots of tools out there to block out those kinds of distractions to help you right (example). You can also try writing by hand on paper so that the internet is further away from the task.
Writing is really intimidating. The blank page taunts you.
Start by writing out your idea at the top of the page. It doesn't have to be in-depth, it can just be something like "A and B are stuck in different locations for a long period of time and they discover they're in love with each other while writing letters back and forth." By doing this, the page is no longer blank so you can fool yourself into thinking you've already started writing and just need to continue.
When I sit down to write, I don't know where you start.
If you're in the process of writing a story, try not to end a writing session on the end of a scene. Either write the start of the next scene or stop writing before you hit the end of the current scene. Then the next time you write, you have a place to pick up from and don't need to make a choice of where to go next. If you're starting a new idea, start at the point where it's interesting. You can go back and write the boring part later if you decide you really want or need to.
There are lots more things that stop people from writing, but I'll let people in the notes add more examples. If you're a writer, how do you make time for writing?
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Yin & Yang (Steddie X You)
A/N: This post got me feeling some kind of way🫠 .
Warnings: Older Daddy Eddie (Late 30s)/ Older Dom Mr. Harrington (Late 30s) & Younger Fem Sub Y/N (mid 20s)
SMUT, LOTS of dirty talk, male masturbation, fingering, talks of sharing (duh), slight innocence kink (if you squint; she's new to the dynamic), ANGST, reader deals with a rude customer and Eddie saves the day. A fight between Eddie and Y/N are mentioned.
Word Count: 4838
Donate to my Ko-Fi <3
Everyone always said Edward Munson was a rude, pretentious asshole. News outlets, websites, social media; everyone who met him briefly or not at all expressed a particular distain for him that you always found amusing when the topic came up.
Visually, he did seem a bit aloof whenever the businessman did any kind of interview or was asked any kind of question. It was always a bit odd seeing a music producer get so much attention especially one who focused on the heavy metal scene but everyone who hated him also tended to agree that he was a genius at the craft.
The bands he signed and prompted always hit high numbers on their respective charts making him and them a ton of extra money in the process.
Anything you read or heard you skimmed past mostly because that wasn’t exactly your scene nor did you know anything when it came to what goes on the background of the music industry. Working at a coffee shop wasn’t extravagant or lucrative but it got you through till you could figure what actually was your scene and go from there.
That’s how you met him.
On a particularly rough shift, a man was screaming at you about an order that you supposedly got wrong as you tried to control the tears from spilling down your face.
“How stupid are you?! It’s coffee not a fucking math equation. You just put the right liquid in the right cup and fucking hand it to me! It’s not that hard! Fucking moron.”
“Excuse me.” The man turned just as the handsome gentleman who addressed him hung up his phone and shoved it into his coat pocket. “I understand you’re a bit stressed but I’m going to have to ask you to stop harassing the young lady. It’s not her fault and she’s doing her best.”
“Pfft. Fuck off, douchebag. This doesn’t concern you.”
“It actually does because you couldn’t handle this situation in a quiet calm manner. You’re ruining everyone’s morning including mine. Now…either take the coffee she’s giving you or wait for her to make a new one patiently.”
The man’s fist flew but the gentleman moved out of the way, grabbing his wrist, and twisting it as he forced the man to kneel before him.
“Ok. If this is the way you want to do this, that’s fine. Sweetheart…” When he addressed you, you immediately stood at attention ready to die for this man if he asked after what he had just done. “Can you hand me that cup there? Thank you.”, he praises, flashing you a small smile that makes you giddy. “Now, apologize to the young lady.”
“Ow, I’m sorry!”, the man cringes when his wrist is twisted a bit more.
“Good. Take this coffee and get the fuck out of my sight. If I see you here again I won’t be so nice.”
Disregarding the Styrofoam in the gentleman’s hand, the rude customer quickly gets to his feet before running out of the store. Sighing, your hero places the coffee in front of you.
“Thank you…for defending me… He was being such an asshole.”
“Yeah, he was. It’s not your fault he didn’t order the correct thing. I can be an asshole myself but I know when and where to use it.” When you giggled, his beautiful eyes scan you over as if trying to get a read on you with the little information in front of him.
“Are you, um, are you Edward?”, you ask as you slide him the coffee with the name scrawled across.
Again, he glances you over and later on you would learn he was looking for recognition. Everyone he interacted with knew his name and who he was. You were the first person in years who seemed to regard him as just another stranger which fascinated him.
“I am but you can call me Eddie. That’s what my friends call me.”
“Oh. Um, we’re friends?”
“For now, but I’d like to be more whenever you’re open to it.”
Another smile stretched across his face when he noticed your own turn bright red as you blushed.
“You don’t even know my name.”
Coyly, he leans his elbows on to your counter as his eyes stare at your chest. At first you feel self-conscious before you realize he’s looking at your name tag and you let out a tiny laugh to break the tension.
“I’m sorry, I just—”
“Do I make you nervous?”
“A little.”
“Honest. I like that. How about this. I can pick you up after your shift today and we can start with dinner and go from there.”
“I don’t have any clothes to change into.”
“That’s ok. I think you look perfect as is and I promise when I come get you I won’t be dressed as formal.”
“O-Ok, Eddie.”
“Good. Good girl. I’ll see you tonight.”
That evening, he showed up right as the shop was about to close and when you told him it would be a few more minutes, he nodded as he patiently waited by the front door. You occasionally snuck glances at him as he browsed his phone. True to his word, he wore jeans and sneakers with a nice white button up shirt that he had rolled up to his elbows. With how he looked this morning, you imagined for him this was dressed pretty down. While his hair was slicked back when you last saw him, now his waves seemed to have a mind of their own making him seem less intimidating and quite adorable.
Eddie asked you so many different questions about yourself, silently listening as you both ate at the restaurant he took you to. You learned fairly quickly, while he seemed like a man of few words, his body language spoke loudly. His chocolate eyes never left yours as he hung on each and every word you spoke. When you said something he found even remotely funny, his lips would flicker into a slight smirk before returning to their proper alignment. When your drink ran low, his finger would raise and a waiter would promptly run your way with a refill and as the night progressed you found his leg leaning against yours with a little sigh escaping his chest when you didn’t shy away.
“I feel kind of selfish. I’ve been talking about myself a lot but I feel like I don’t know anything about you.”
“Honestly, sweetheart, it’s a nice reprieve. Everyone I run into knows me and my perceived reputation so to finally meet someone who doesn’t know me is a breath of fresh air.”
“Reputation…”, you repeated the word apprehensively.
“Um, I’m kind of known as being a jerk.”
“You don’t seem like that to me.”
Eddie smiled so wide this time that his teeth came into view and you knew at that moment you’d do whatever it took to see him smile like that as much as possible.
“Thank you for that. I can be when I need to be. In my line of work people tend to take advantage pretty early on and I wanted this industry to know I’m not someone to fuck with.”
“Do you make movies or?”
“Music. I’m a music producer for some heavy metal bands.”
“Oh wow! That’s so amazing. I would love to know more! Did you use to play?”
When he finally began to open up, hours passed like minutes and you were so entranced that you didn’t even realize the restaurant was getting ready to close.
Eddie told you at one point he was in a band but hated the way they were cast aside for being “to generic” and “stuck in the past” so he took matters into his own hands. He bought a building and turned it into a label where he could help produce his friend’s music. He learned everything he could about production and managing, getting everything together, and essentially put Corroded Coffin on the map.
He found that he actually loved working behind the scenes and stuck with it from that point forward. Now he’s a well-respected name in his field earning triple what he would have made as a guitarist.
“What’s the name of the label you first opened?”
“Franklin Production; my mother’s maiden name. It seemed right because her money bought the building and she always loved music. She died when I was young.”
When his head hung, your heart broke.
“Oh my God, Eddie. I’m so sorry.”
His mood changed in the blink of an eye as he breathily chuckled and glanced at his watch.
“Shit, Y/N, it’s almost 1am. You have to be exhausted after your long shift today. Let me pay for our meal here and then I can take you home.”
“We’ve ordered so much food and drinks. Please let me help pay.” He paused at your comment then as his eyes met your now confused ones. “What?”
“I’ve only met one person who ever offered something like you just did and that man is my best friend.”
“I mean…it’s rude…isn’t it? It’s not fair for me to expect you to pay for everything.”
“Fuck me, baby.” Your eyelids visibly flutter at the term of endearment; coming out of his mouth with a sultry husk that made you swoon. “You’re really something special. I appreciate the offer but when you’re with me, honey, I can take care of you. It’s my pleasure quite honestly.”
You watched him pay the waiter and leave him way more than 15% before Eddie grabs your hand, leading you back to his car.
That night he dropped you off at your apartment continuing to be the perfect gentleman as he walked you to your door and kept his hands behind his back as you slowly turned your key. Before you entered, however, you paused and hastily turned to plant a small kiss on his lips. Without waiting for a retort, you want inside and shut your door with a little giggle, watching through the peephole to see what he’d do.
Eddie’s fingers softly brushed against his mouth as he grinned the way you enjoyed at the restaurant.
***
You had been together now for a few months and you loved him with every fiber of your being. Eddie was extremely protective over you insisting you quit your job and move in with him.
“Sweetheart, I don’t want you being somewhere where some fucker can belittle you and make you feel like trash. I can take care of you till you find a new job that makes you happy and people treat you with the respect you deserve.”
“Eddie, I can’t ask you to do that.”
“You’re not asking; I’m offering.”, he cooed as his hands cupped your cheeks. “You know how much Daddy loves looking after his pretty girl.”
The first time he called himself Daddy, you blushed and hid behind your hands making him smile as he chuckled low in his throat.
“Have you ever called a man Daddy before?” When you giggle and curl tighter into your body, he climbed into the bed beside you and pulled you to his side. “It’s ok, sweetheart. Nothing to be embarrassed about with me. Can I show you something?”
Eddie grins when you drop your palms and show him your beautiful face.
“Good girl.”, he praises as he takes ahold of your hand and kisses the back of it. With his eyes locked on yours, he gradually places it on the bulge in his slacks. “You feel that? Do you feel how hard I am just from being around you as is? You don’t have to do or say anything you don’t want to, princess. I’ll still be here and I’ll still want to fuck you till you can barely move.”
A smile twitched on his lips when your breathing stuttered.
“I-I-I’ve never called anyone Daddy before or done anything that’s not…”
“Vanilla?”, he helped when your sentence stalled. “Vanilla’s ok to. Definitely a delicious flavor that can’t be disregarded. Can I tell you a secret?”
“Of course.”
Eddie leans in till his mouth is just hovering over the shell of your ear.
“The fact that you’re so nervous and innocent to all this really fucking turns me on.”
When his cock strains a bit more against the fabric and pushes back against your hand, you can’t help but release a little whine as you push your thighs together.
“What’s wrong, baby? Got a bit of an ache between your legs?”
“Yes.”, you breath out heavily as his palm ghosts up your thigh and his lips tenderly peck along your neck.
“I can help with that if you want.”
“Y-Yes, Daddy, please.”
Now, you were more than comfortable especially since he was always so patient with you when it came to almost everything. Unlike your past relationships, you were genuinely surprised at how little the two of you fought if at all. Eddie was a force in his business but when you two were together he was always as accommodating as possible. The one time you ever saw his anger directed towards you was when you forgot your phone when you went on a girl’s night out with your friends.
When you came home at 2 in the morning, he was waiting in the living room and pacing with a glass of whiskey in his hand.
“It’s 2 in the morning, Y/N! I’ve been worried sick! You forgot your phone. What if something happened to you and you couldn’t reach me!?”
“Eddie, it’s ok! I just forgot it. I promise I’ll do better next time—”
“That’s not the point! What if there hadn’t been a next time!? I’m responsible for you!”
“I don’t know what you want me to say!! I’m sorry!!”
“You watch that fucking tone with me, little girl!”
“Oh yeah. Or what?!”
When the glass in his hand shattered into the wall behind you everything became abruptly silent. Tears stung your eyes as you grabbed the little trashcan nearby and scooted towards the mess, sinking to your knees as you collect the pieces.
“Y/N, baby. No. No, no. Let me clean this, please.”, Eddie begged, his tone much softer than before as he kneeled beside you.
When he tried to take the sharp items from your grasp, you angrily pulled away from him.
“I didn’t mean to forget my phone. It was an honest mistake and you had no right screaming at me like you just did!”
“I know. You’re right, sweetheart. You are absolutely right. I just… fuck… I’m so sorry, Y/N. I love you so much and the idea of something happening to you or you getting hurt just terrifies me. I shouldn’t have reacted this way.”
Blinking up at him, your hand reaches for his own.
“You love me?”
“Yeah, Y/N, of course. Since I met you behind that coffee counter.”
After tackling him excitedly, you beamed as you kissed his lips.
“I love you to.”
People on the outside didn’t seem to understand why you were with him but they didn’t know him the way you did. Eddie was sweet, funny, and incredibly kind despite his hardened outer exterior. According to the man himself, the only other person who understood him the same way you did was a man you had yet to meet.
#############
Steven Harrington was a name you knew solely due to his reputation in media.
He was always portrayed as just another trust fund baby who was utilizing daddy’s money to do whatever he wanted. He got in trouble constantly but brushed it off with a sexy smile and a calm demeanor that made even the biggest skeptic want to trust him.
The first time Eddie mentioned him by name was after you noticed him watching one of Steve’s interviews.
“Fucking idiot.”, he chuckled light-heartedly, turning the screen of his phone so you could watch to when you climbed into bed beside him. “This is the guy I was telling you about. Steve Harrington has been my best friend for years.”
“This is your best friend?”
When he nods, you focus on the interview in front of you.
“No, no. Trust me, that company would be crazy to sell right now in this economy. Once things bounce back it will be worth way more than it is now. Then again…if they sell I could buy it and turn it into a hotel or some s***. Go ahead than! Sell that f***er!”, he laughs making you giggle as well when his nose scrunches adorably.
“Steve is actually a very clever business guy. People constantly underestimate him because he acts like a playboy.”
“So…he’s the yin to your yang?”
Eddie smirks down at you before kissing your forehead.
“You could say that.”
The more your boyfriend told you about him the more you wanted to meet him. Eddie seemed to genuinely care about this person and as his girlfriend you wanted him to get to know him as well. The first time you spoke to him was after you moved in with Ed and he called to congratulate you both.
“Hey! Are you Y/N?”
“I am.”, you grin.
“Oh good. I don’t know what I would have done if you said no. ‘EDDIE! Some random pretty girl is in your place!’”, Steve laughed.
“Pft. How do you know I’m pretty?”
“Because a sexy voice like yours must be inside a beautiful woman. I’m kind of jealous.”
He said it so smoothly that if you weren’t already sitting you’re sure his words would have knocked you off your feet. Your eyes glanced towards Eddie who was watching you from his spot on the couch.
“Uh oh. Did I lose you, honey? Sorry. Sometimes I come on a bit too strong.”
“No, no. It’s ok. You just… you remind me of him.”, you exhale as you get up and walk towards your boyfriend.
“Of who? Of Eddie? I take that as a compliment. He’s a good man.”
“Yeah he is but that’s not exactly what I meant.”
“Oh? Well then use your words, pretty girl. Who do I remind you of? I’m DYING to know.”
Eddie softly smirks as he watches your breathing stagger the same way it does when you’re intimidated by something. His ring covered fingers gently trace down your arm making you shiver.
“Tell me.”
The two words that followed came out as a strong command that told you to obey. The contradiction of how he spoke now to how he had before made you dizzy and you desperately wanted more.
“Daddy.”
After tossing the phone next to Eddie, you covered your face with your palms and ran up the stairs. A few moments later, the man you loved climbed into bed beside you and collected you into his arms.
“Talk to me, baby. Remember, no matter what there’s nothing to be embaressed about, ok?” He smiled when he felt you nod against his chest. “I know Steve can be a bit much at first but he’s a good person who’s been through a lot of bullshit.”
As you sniffle, you tilt back so you could see his face.
“I feel bad.”
“About what, sweetheart?”
“I liked the way he spoke to me. It turned me on the same way you do.”
“Ok…why does that make you feel bad?”
You shrug. “I love you.”
That makes him genuinely smile.
“I love you to, Y/N, so much. That’s why I trust you, babe. I, um, I have a confession to make.” When you sit up to give him your full attention, he does the same. “I’ve known Steve for a long time and I trust that man with my life. I’ve told him things I’ve never told anyone and he’s done the same. You said, sweetheart, he’s the yin to my yang and you’re right. Fuck… how do I say this…”
“You want to share me?”
The innocent way you asked your question drove him insane but he pushed down the need to fuck you for the time being.
“Kind of, yes. I…I wanted to see how you two got along and if it worked out, maybe, we could fly to go meet him and… you’d still be mine but he’d—”
“Use me.”
“Fuck, baby, you have to stop saying things like that the way you are.”, Eddie panted excitedly as he adjusted the growing bulge in his pants.
“May I ask why? Why you would want to share me like that?”
“Of course, Y/N, you can always ask me anything. You hold the power here especially when it comes to this. I just… he’s my best friend and I want him to be happy to. In these past few months, you’ve changed my world and I just want to give him some of that. I, um, I also think…”
“Tell me, Daddy. Please.”, you beg in your tiny voice that has his eyes closing as he tries to control himself.
“Fuck… I think it would be incredibly hot to watch you fuck him.”
You had told him you were open but apprehensive because it was all new territory for you. Both men came up with an idea to help you get acclimated to the idea.
“Hey all. Wow, Jesus Christ Munson, you undersold your girlfriend’s beauty. Hot damn.”
You giggled as Eddie rolled his eyes at his friend who was laughing himself from his side of the computer screen. It looked like Steve had the device he was using for this facetime visit resting on his lower stomach as he leaned against the headboard of his bed looking incredibly sexy with his ruffled hair and tank top just barely covering the chest hair that littered his skin.
Eddie had you sitting in between his own legs as he rested his head against your shoulder and his arms hugged you to him.
“I hope I’m not making you uncomfortable. If I do at any point please just let me know and I’ll respect your boundaries.”
“You don’t make me uncomfortable but, uh, you kind of intimidate me a bit…more than Eddie did.”
“Is it because I start at 10 and go from there? Yeah, casualties of growing up in chaotic household and then starting a business where your biggest competitor is your father.”
“What DO you do? Ed said you’re an investor?”
“Kind of. I invested in a friend’s tech company many years ago and that paid off in a big way. They make medical supplies that are high quality for a cheaper price. I’m trying to expand so we can invest in more—Pfft! Listen to me talking about all that bullshit. Let’s talk about something else.”
“No, hey! That’s amazing that you do that. My father needed supplies like that but it was so hard for him to afford stuff. You’ve probably helped so many people. What supplies has your company helped make?”
Steve blinked, sitting up straighter.
“Huh.”
“I told you.”, Eddie sings as he places a delicate kiss along your skin.
“D-Did I do something wrong? Am I not allowed to ask him questions?”, you asked genuinely worried you crossed a line.
“Most people, let alone women, don’t care enough to ask us things like you just did.”
“Maybe you two are spending time around the wrong people.”
“Maybe… Damn, Eddie. She’s perfect. Where did you find her because obviously I’ve been looking in the wrong places.”
“Hm. I found her in a coffee shop being yelled at by some asshole. Fucker.”, he growled before you tilted back and kissed his cheek. “It’s not just her personality either. Her body fucking drives me crazy. Even just watching her walk from the bed to the bathroom makes me so fucking hard.”
“Yeah? Your Daddy says you have sexy body. Can you show it to me?”
“Only if you’re comfortable, princess.”, Eddie whispers in your ear.
“Can you help me, Daddy?”
Nodding, he removes each item of your clothing till you were naked for the man on the screen in front of you.
“Fuck me. I’m not just saying this, Y/N, but you’re so gorgeous.”
“Thank you.”, you groan as you lick your lips. “May I see you?”
“Well, since you asked so nicely.”, he smirks.
Your whole body tingled as you watched him undress until you sucked in a sharp intake of air when his cock sprang free from his cotton confinement.
“He’s so big.”, you murmur against Eddie’s cheek as his eyes remain downcast to focus on you. “How will it fit?”
“We’ll make fit, pretty girl. Steve and I can take care of you.”
“Everything alright?”
“Yeah. Little one is worried about your splitting her in half. “
“Don’t worry, honey, I’m a gentleman to. I’m not going to just shove my dick inside of you. Even if it takes hours, we can eat and finger your little pussy till she’s ready.”
“Fuck, Daddy, please.”
Aggressively, Eddie opens your legs wide putting you on display and making Steve groan.
“Wet already and no one’s even touched you yet.”, he responded mockingly before leaning over his cock to spit on his tip and stroke himself. “How tight is she, Munson?”
You moaned loudly as Eddie inserted two of his thick fingers into your cunt and your head leaned back against him.
“So fucking tight, Harrington, and greedy. Her pussy just sucks me in and chokes my dick when she cums. Add in her sexy little noises and the way her face scrunches…”
“Open your eyes, Y/N.” Steve smiles when you do what he asks. “Good girl. She listens to. Fuck, baby, don’t take those eyes off me. God, I’m—mmm—I’m dying to feel those pretty lips around my cock.”
“You’re really good at sucking cock, aren’t you, sweetheart?”
“Y-Yes, Daddy. I’m…M’close.”
“I know, pretty girl. I can feel it. Why don’t you tell Stevie how bad you want his cum.”
You mewl as Eddie moves at a faster pace with the sound of your slick echoing around the room.
“Please, Mr. Harrington, Sir. I-I-I want your cum so much. I want to feel you—ahhhh—feel your cock in my mouth till you spill down my throat.”
“Jesus Christ.”, he grunted and you both watched as his release hit his thigh.
“You did so good, sweetheart. Cum for Daddy now, baby.”, Eddie praised as your back pushed against his chest and you panted as you came. “That’s my girl. Good girl. Ride it out on my fingers till you come back to me. That’s it.”
“Fucking hell. That was amazing, honey.” Steve watch with fascination as you turned your body and wrapped an arm around Eddie’s chest as you curled into his warm chest. “Everything ok?”
“She’s fine. It’s something baby girl does when she cums hard like that. She’ll squeeze me like a fucking Teddy bear and fall asleep. Sometimes it’s for a few minutes or a few hours. At first I thought it was the headspace but I don’t know. Either way I love it.”
“Yeah, man. If she had a good time and is open to it I have that party coming up in a month. You two can fly down and we can hang out. Of course, nothing has to happen. I can always just show you guys around and get to know her more.”
“I’ll let you know when she wakes up and we talk about it.”
“No problem. No problem. Hey, maybe at most, you and I can fuck around.”, Steve replies as he coyly raises his eyebrows making his friend laugh.
“Ok, calm down over there.”
“Oh, come on. Not like it would be the first time—”
“Good night, asshole.”, Eddie teases as he cuts him off and closes the laptop.
#################
“Are you alright, sweetheart?”, Eddie asks as he watches you fidget with your hands as you stare at your reflection in the metal of the elevator.
“Yeah. I’m just a little nervous. This is your best friend and I know how much he means to you. I don’t want to…I don’t know…fuck anything up.”
“Fuck, I still think it’s hot when you get all jittery like this.”, he chuckles as he takes your palm in his. “You have absolutely nothing to worry about. I love you so I know for a fact he will. Just keep being your unique self, baby, and no matter what I’ll be here if you need anything.”
When he flashes you that big toothy grin, you can’t help but smile back as you lean up on your toes to kiss his lips. The doors abruptly swing open and your boyfriend’s demeanor instantly hardens at the sound of loud party guests in the room you both step into.
Your eyes swing around the area with no sign of the host himself.
Tugging on Eddie’s bicep, you lead him to the drink station where you desperately chug down some liquid courage as you pray that tonight goes as smoothly as possible.
#steddie#steddie x reader#steddie x you#steddie x y/n#eddie munson#daddy eddie#eddie munson smut#eddie munson angst#eddie munson fluff#steve harrington#steve harrington smut#steve harrington fluff#steve harrington angst#stranger things#joe keery#joseph quinn#fan fiction#stranger things fic#stranger things fanfiction#eddie fanfic#steve fanfic
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Williamson Holding
Hi guys!
Sooo this is a request from @holly-wallis and honestly it's massive. Like more than 14K words. It took me forever to do it, that's why I haven't post as much as before those last days/weeks.
I really hope that you will enjoy it. I proofread it two times but it's so big that I might have forgot some faults.
TW : Angst, Jealousy, Break up, One-side love, Game lost, mention of Covid. Reader is Leah Williamson's sister.
Gif credit for Caitlin’s one at @teenwolf-theoriginals
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You were an accident. Not really wanted at first, you were born 354 days after Leah, the 18 March 1998. Your parents weren’t ready to have a second child so early after the birth of their first daughter, but you never felt anything but love from them. People joke sometimes that they used the same recipe for Leah and for you. It’s true that you look a lot like her physically and for the character you have definitively some similar points too. You both are determined, loyal, funny, and very close of your family. But the person you are the closest is definitively Leah.
3 years after you, your brother Jacob is born. You like to joke about it and saying that they finally weren’t to traumatize by you more than that. Jacob is your brother, and you love him very much, but your relationship is different from the one with Leah. You like having time with him, but with him being away in Australia now, it’s a little bit harder.
Oh, and like Leah and your mother you’re an Arsenal fan, obviously.
You started football together, but you played the goalkeeper, letting Leah practicing striking and dribbling. You weren’t bad to be honest, but they was to many competition to be a goalkeeper and you decided during your teenager period to go for study instead of football.
You were great in it honestly; Leah sometimes asked you to do her homework when she came back too late from training. You’ll do it with pleasure, happy to help your big sister who paid you generously in candy. Or dried mango, your great passion.
On day after Leah turned 17, she made her big debut with Arsenal senior team. You were so proud of her, cheering her from the stand with all your family. It was very different of what it is now, but you already knew that she would make something amazing in football. And how much were you right.
It was at this period that Leah and you talked about a company that you could make together. Leah was studying accounting in case of her career wasn’t successful and you were very interested in marketing, publicity and human relations.
The Williamson Holding Corporation was founded in summer 2016, when you finished your tuition. You learned several languages (French, Spanish and Mandarin) during your free time and thanks to Leah and your parent’s financial help, you were able to start this adventure. Your company always were able to have a good profit every year. You were able to repay your parents already and Leah always refused, so you made her a founder, just like you.
Through the years, your company get a sponsorship with Arsenal and in particular Arsenal Women, obviously. Along the years, you managed to travel a lot to make your company known in other countries and find other financials, but you always managed to come back to see Leah play. You never missed one of her games, as crazy at it sound.
February 2020 – When you properly met Caitlin for the first time.
“Y/N! Sorry, can I borrow my sister for one second?”
Leah doesn’t wait for the answer to your interlocutor and takes your arm to drag you somewhere else. You let her though, secretly happy to have to finish this uninterested discussion with that weird man. You note mentally to be sure not to invite him to the next gala.
“Where’s the dead body?” you ask your sister who rolls her eyes.
“Don’t joke about it, we’ll get catch by Covid otherwise.”
You roll your eyes yourself, but don’t say anything. You just wait to your sister to stop at some time, for what she almost kidnapped you. You end up right in front of Caitlin Foord, the new signing for Arsenal. You already saw her to the games, you smirked when you caught her looking at you two time before realizing that you weren’t Leah, the first time she saw you. To her point, you were wearing Leah’s jersey.
“Cait, my sister. Sis, this is Caitlin.” Leah introduces you, before leaving you both to catch someone else.
“Uh, hello?” Caitlin mumbles with surprise, apparently not advertise that Leah were going to introduce you both.
“Hi” you giggle. “Nice to be properly introduced to you. Please excuse my sister, she isn’t the one who studied human relations.”
Your giggles and your joke help Caitlin to relax and you’re happy to see her smiling too.
“I can see that” Caitlin answers with her Australian accent.
You had a small talk with her about Australia, a country where you never been for now. You really looked to it though, and not only to have the opportunity to make your company bigger. Jacob and you always talked about going there for holidays. And after talking to Caitlin, you will definitively go to the east part of the country.
You were joined by Katie McCabe and the three of you started talking for a long time after that. Caitlin asked you several questions about your company and seems surprised to learn the amount of work you are putting in it.
“She’s a natural” Katie smirks “Everyone comes eat in her hand, she can make people do whatever she wants.”
You smirk back, raising an eyebrow while crossing your arms on your chest at the same time.
“Not everything with everyone.”
Katie doesn’t have the time to answer anyway, because Leah is back with her Williamson’s frown.
“No flirting with my teammates Y/N!”
“I wasn’t! I wouldn’t have any problem with Irish mafia.” you answer, thinking about Katie’s girlfriend.
You raise both of your hands to prove your innocence. Katie and you aren’t really flirting, it was more for fun and for joking with each other. Katie laughs while Leah hums for any answer and changed the subject just after that, training you, Katie and Caitlin in the discussion.
The night went great, and you are happy to be able to have some time with Leah’s teammates who are also your friends, especially the ones who are in the team since a long time. You get along pretty well with Caitlin too, who would accept really quickly to at least make a photoshoot and a sponsoring for your company. Unfortunately there is suddenly the lockdown and you weren’t able to do it before that.
October 2020 – The shooting
“Hi Y/N!”
You smile to the employee who greats you when you enter the building where the photoshoot for Caitlin was attending. Being at every single one is something you do every time, so your employees aren’t surprised to see you coming. You great them back, asking around if everything is fine with everyone. It seems to be, so you go to find Caitlin.
The Australian girl is just coming out of the room where she changed her clothes and find herself right in front of you.
“Oh hi! I didn’t know you will come.”
“I like to be here for this kind of things” you answer with a smile. “How are you?”
“I’m fine thank you” she smiles back.
“Y/N are you ok if we start?” the photographer asks.
“Of course. I’m going to sit here.”
You look at your phone on the way, answering a message from one of your managers before sitting on a chair some meters away from the different cameras. Caitlin doesn’t seem to be at ease at first, but soon she finds her way. You have a perfect and entirely trust in your team, but you have already red too much time how people can make other bad with their comportment, and you clearly don’t want that in your company. That’s why you don’t have a lot of employees too. That and the fact that you love have the control on everything.
After several shots, the photographer decides to make a break and you come over to see what the pictures look like. They are great to be honest.
“I really love this one” you smile, pointing one of the pictures.
Caitlin’s blue eyes are really showing in it. You haven’t realized how blue they are since now to be honest. You then raise your gaze on the girl, just to cross the same blue.
“I think this is my favorite too.”
You hum, before congratulating the photographer for her job. It’s the first time she does it for you, but you will certainly ask her to work for you again. She’s young, like you, and you like the idea to help young people to start in their life. Provided they deserve it, of course.
They take other pictures after that, and you choose five of them to post on the social media.
“Do you want to go to eat something?” you ask Caitlin when everything is finished.
You don’t always have the time to do it with everyone, but when you can, you do it. Like you said before, almost every girl in Arsenal is your friend. You know some of them more, like Jen Beattie, Katie McCabe, or Lia Wälti who are the closest to Leah to be honest. But you like all of them. You didn’t have the time to meet Steph Catley for now though. It probably will be coming soon.
Caitlin accepted your offer, and you take her to one of your favorite restaurants.
“I didn’t expect to eat at Nando’s to be honest” Caitlin smiles after you sat at your table.
“Oh” you answer, looking up from the menu you know by heart. “We can go somewhere else if you want, I thought – “
“No, it’s perfect here. I like it. I used to go there with my Mum and my sister a lot back in Australia.”
You smile softly, relaxing a little bit. People seems to forget sometimes that you are still a young woman who can enjoy eating burger or fries with her fingers.
“How are you settling in London?” you ask after the waiter came to take your command.
“Good, actually. The rain is something else, but the girls are great.”
“I heard you especially like the Swiss part” you smirk.
You laugh when Caitlin blushes. Leah told you about Lia and Caitlin relationship several weeks ago, when they start to date officially. You don’t have to tell Caitlin how you know it though; the girl understands it really quickly.
“Leah talks too much” she smiles nevertheless. “What about you? Are you seeing someone?”
“Not for now” you shake your head, adding when you see Caitlin’s questioning look. “I mean I had some dates slash fling with someone but it’s hard to be in a relationship while working so much. Girls seems to have a hard time understanding I will pass my family and my job before something else. I can understand though, so it’s better for me to be single for now.”
“I didn’t know you were into girls too. You really are Leah’s copy.”
“Maybe” you smile.
Your sister is your favorite person ever. You will never be upset to be compared to her. In your eyes, she’s the most amazing person in the world.
“I am lucky to be able to see her so much. I won’t be able to deal with it as good as you do.”
“It’s very hard sometimes. Because of the lockdown and all I wasn’t able to go back to Australia. I haven’t seen them for almost a year now…”
You wince at the sadness suddenly present in Caitlin’s eyes, regretting to have point this. You are interrupted by the waiter and your meal coming for you, but you excuse yourself anyway.
“I’m sorry to bring it up. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“I know, don’t worry” Caitlin smiles softly. “I will see them soon now.”
You look into Caitlin’s eyes for some more seconds to be sure that she’s saying the truth, before nodding slowly. She seems to be honest, and you are really relieved. Starting a friendship like this would have been the worst way. You finally smile back and report your attention on your plate just after Caitlin did.
The following of the conversation is a little easier, talking about Arsenal helps a lot. You talk to Caitlin about all the little things she maybe didn’t know for now and learn a lot of things about her and her past. She talked to you about her childhood and the financial difficulties her mother had, raising two children as a single mom. That makes you realize one more time how lucky you are to be where you are now. This kind of stories remember you about it and it’s never enough in your opinion.
October 2021 – The surprise
Unlike Caitlin was hopping, she wasn’t able to see her family as much as she wanted. She went in Switzerland with Lia though and told you that it was a very great time. You thought about her sometimes, remembering the trouble her eyes did to you, but you erased this kind of thoughts very quickly. Caitlin was in a happy relationship and there is no way you even look at a no-single lady.
You managed to build a friendship with her though and you sometimes went out with her, Lia, and Leah. You had a great time every time and you decided that it was perfect for you like this.
Caitlin opened herself to you about missing her family, but the tickets to come in London from Australia were expensive and you know that she doesn’t mean it like that, but you don’t think twice before contacting Caitlin’s sister and offering to them the tickets. They refuse at first, but you managed to find the good words. And, not for the situation being strange, you included Lia in the surprise.
After all, Caitlin was your friend and Lia was her girlfriend.
The Swiss woman went to the airport to take Jamie and her mother back to Caitlin home. Leah asked the team to put some interview or media things for Caitlin at the right time, to let you and her decorate Caitlin’s house with the most too much decoration ever. There is a banner writing “Surprise” on it, yellow and green balloons, an Australian flag, and you even managed to find a kangaroo balloon who is floating around the living room.
“That’s so kitsch. I love it” Leah smirks.
You giggle while looking around. You have to admit that you made a great job together. Two seconds after, Lia and the two Foord were coming inside the house. After some greetings and hugs, they looked at the decoration and approve it too.
“So, I guess this is our time to leave.” Leah says while looking at you.
You nod and prepare yourself to take your things to leave. It was without counting on Caitlin’s mother opinion.
“What do you mean you’re leaving?” Simone asks with her Australian accent. “You helped to do that; you’re definitively staying.”
“But – “ you start.
“No but.”
You see Jamie, Caitlin’s sister, rolling her eyes at her mother antics, but you don’t have time to say something else because Lia comes, running from the entrance where she was looking outside.
“She’s here! Hide!”
After a moment of panic, Jamie and Simone hide behind the couch while Leah and you went to the kitchen. Two seconds later, the door is open.
“Lia? You’re home?” Caitlin asks.
“In the living room, Love.”
You hear the characteristic sound of keys dropping on a wood furniture and Caitlin walking to the living room. You can’t help but peek in the room, Leah doing exactly the same thing a second after, her head above yours.
“Surprise!”
Caitlin probably had a heart attack, but you can’t help but smile seeing her face. Lia is doing the same thing while Jamie and Simone went to hug the shocked girl. You smirk seeing Leah getting emotional, what’s coast you a slap on the head. You send her the Williamson’s glare, but she doesn’t seem to be impress by at for a single second. Which probably make sense.
After some tears and explications, Leah proposed to serve the Champagne she choose to celebrate the reunion. Your sister and you try to escape one more time to let the Foord in family, but Simone doesn’t let you one more time.
It’s a little bit later that you find yourself alone with Caitlin, while you were looking for something alcohol free to drink.
“Lia told me what you did. I don’t have the words to thank you enough.”
Of course, Lia isn’t the kind of girl to take credits for something she hasn’t done. You smile and shrug at Caitlin.
“You don’t have to. I was happy to do that for you.”
Caitlin bites her lip and looks in your eyes.
“You know, when I mention that the tickets were expensive…”
“I know you weren’t saying it for me to do that, Cait. I wouldn’t have done it otherwise.”
“Ok.”
You smile again and were ready to go back to the living room, but Caitlin surprises you by giving you a hug. You weren’t expecting it to be honest, but it’s still pleasant. You hug her back, tightening her briefly against you.
“Thank you” she mumbles.
“You’re welcome.”
Spring 2022 – The Breakup
“Caitlin and Lia broke up”
“What?”
You stop your movement, your chopsticks between your mouth and your plate. You were having dinner with Leah in her house, like every Monday when you are in London. Leah snorts when the noodles fall back in your plate, making some sauce splash your shirt, but that’s not what you are concentrating on.
“What do you mean they broke up?”
Leah shrug et finish her chicken before answering you.
“It happened this weekend, Lia called me Sunday evening.”
“What happened?”
You were shocked. Lia and Caitlin seem to get along very well the last time you saw them.
“Nothing much. Lia said they just went apart and that her relationship was more comfortable than passionate now.”
“So, they’re ok?”
“I don’t really know for Caitlin. But Lia was still very upset about it. They are still friends and care for each other obviously, but they aren’t a couple anymore.”
You frown only, not really sure what to do about this information. Lia was a good friend of yours and you kind of have avoided Caitlin since you make her family come to England. You realized that day that you were too impacted with her happiness to be only a friend. In your mind, she was with Lia and this relationship would be like forever. It was to protect yourself too, falling for someone who isn’t single isn’t really your thing.
“Did you have news from Caitlin?”
“No” you answer, eating again. “I mean I saw her at the last games but that’s all.”
“Mh.”
“What?” you ask, raising an eyebrow.
“Nothing.”
“‘k.”
Several hours later, you were on your bed, your phone in your hand and the conversation with Caitlin opened. It wasn’t used since your birthday, Caitlin sent you a message to wish you happy birthday, but nothing since that.
Writing to her isn’t a good idea, even if she’s single now, she still in a middle of a breakup. But you still can be a good friend to her, right? You just have to put your feelings away.
From You
Hi Caitlin, I heard about your breakup by Leah. I just wanted to tell that if you need someone to talk or something, don’t hesitate to call or write me, ok? I hope you’re ok. Take care of you.
You feel stupid to send her something like that after reading it again. It’s kind of cliché and you hate it. But surprisingly, Caitlin answers you relatively quickly.
From Caitlin
Hello, thanks for your message. I will do and I hope you are ok too.
You bite your lips, not really happy about the answer. But in another way, what could you have expected? You didn’t really talk since last year and you were avoiding her like the plague. It’s only your fault.
After that day, you keep checking more frequently with Caitlin, asking her if she needs anything and how she is feeling. From what she answers, she was around a lot with Jordan and Katie. Your sister broke up some weeks ago with Jordan after longs years together, so that’s maybe the explanation of why Leah stays a little away of Caitlin.
You start to talk a lot and when Caitlin starts to be the first to write you can’t help but feel a strange something in your stomach. You also went to eat or drink something, your friendship slowly beginning to start again. You have to admit that you missed her. But she never said or show you anything to make you think that she missed you the way you do.
You think it’s better to have her in your life as a friend than not to have her, though.
Autumn 2022 – The New Season
You never missed a single match from Leah’s team since she plays for Arsenal, so there was no way that you will miss this one too. It’s the first game of the new season and you just came back from your holidays. You went some days with Leah in Ibiza before flying to Dubai with a friend.
You just have time to go home, take a shower and put your Arsenal jersey before coming to the stadium.
“Here she is!” Leah says happily when she sees you.
She hugs you like you haven’t seen each other in months and not ten days. But you hug her back, kissing her cheek before she releases you.
“Someone got a tan” she smirks, taking a step back to have a better look at you.
Unlike Leah, you have the ability to tan. Leah just gets red when she exposed herself without protection. You roll your eyes but don’t respond anything, your attention being catch by a certain Australian striker coming in your direction, five steps away from Leah now.
“And you’re not with your girlfriend?” Leah asks, a teasing smirk always on her face.
“Girlfriend?”
By now Caitlin is just next to Leah and was able to hear your sister. You roll your eyes at her antics before answering.
“She’s not my girlfriend, she’s a friend.”
You frown when Leah snorts and left saying something like “yeah sure”. You watch her leave several seconds before turning to Caitlin.
“She’s not my girlfriend” you say again.
You don’t know why you feel the need to assure that to Caitlin, she probably doesn’t give a single shit about it. In fact, she smiles at you and pass an arm around you to salute you. You didn’t talk a lot a lot during those ten days, the different timetables were insane.
“It’s good to see you” she says before letting you go.
“Good to see you too. How is the comeback from Australia?”
“Still a little jet lag, but I’m fine.”
You smile at her and take the time to really look at her. You don’t do it a lot, scared to fall for her again. I mean, harder. Because now that you have thought about it a little more, you remembered that Leah always told you not to even flirt with one of her teammate. Falling in love with one of them would be worse than everything. You know that she will react very badly to you in a relationship with one of them. You are scared to lose her; Leah will probably never forgive you if she learns that you are in love with Caitlin.
“You look good” you smile sincerely at her.
“Thanks”
You both hear someone calling her on the back, the drills are going to begin, and she has to go.
“Hey, are you still in London tomorrow?” she asks suddenly.
“Yes, why?”
“There is a new place near mine, and they are making brunch who look stunning. Do you want to come?”
“Sure” you smile. “Text me the address and the time.”
After a nod and a smile, she’s gone where she’s needed. The game went great, they got an easy win. And you try to stay impartial when Caitlin got carded.
Christmas 2022 – The New Delivery service
You were at your parent’s house with all your family, without counting Jacob who stayed in Australia this year. Your mother was sad but thanks to a long video call during the moment when you all opened your presents, she seems a little less sad about it. You eat way too much, drink maybe a little too much too. That’s why your mother more or less forbade you to take your car to go home.
Leah stayed too and you are both chilling in one of your parents’ couch with a hot tea. Some Christmas movie is on TV, but you are in a food coma and can’t really focus on it to be honest. You are cuddling against Leah who is playing with your hair.
“Have you heard from Caitlin those days?” your sister asks suddenly.
“We said Merry Christmas to each other this morning, but I guess she’s sleeping now given the time. Why you ask?”
The friendly relationship you have with Caitlin is known by a lot of your friends and family now. And despite all your efforts, you are now deeply in love with her. Seeing her at least both a week don’t help, but you can’t help yourself. When you’re not asking, Caitlin proposes you something and you can’t say no to her.
She told you during autumn that she doesn’t feel very well in her life sometimes, so you made the statement to keep an eye on her.
“She asks to have a mental break. I’m not sure when or if she will come back from Australia. She will miss the first trainings for sure.”
“She didn’t say anything to me” you frown.
She doesn’t have to, to be fair. You are just friends, you’re not her best friend or her sister. She doesn’t owe you anything. But you are still worried.
Later, in your room, you are thinking about a way to send her a message. You don’t want to accuse her of anything or make her feel more pressure. You don’t want to take a place you don’t have too, you sometimes wonder if she’s not having something with Jordan, which would be a little strange maybe. But once again, she doesn’t owe you anything.
From You
Hey, I’m sorry if you feel that it’s not my place to ask. But Leah told me that you needed a mental break, so I was wondering if you were ok?
You wait some minutes before thinking again and realizing the stupidity of your message.
From You
Forget my question, it was stupid. You asked for a mental break, of course you’re not ok
Can you forget those messages please?
You stop there not to look even more strange. You cringe when you throw your phone somewhere on your bed before deciding to go take a long and hot shower. You roll your eyes when your father menace you to make you pay their hot water bill but don’t say anything other than a “Sorry Dad”.
You smile when you hear Leah laughing from her room, before going back to your childhood bedroom. You have a double bed since you are eighteen so you can lay down crosswise it in your towel and look at the ceiling how you want. You soon start to think about how weird your messages to Caitlin were, so you take your phone again.
Just to see that you have two missed calls from Caitlin.
You call her back without waiting a single second, putting your headphone while you wait for her to answer. You realize that it was a FaceTime call only when she answers you with a black screen.
“Hello” she says in a sad voice.
You may be only imagining that because you learned about her need of a mental break only two hours ago.
“Hi. Sorry I missed your calls.”
“Don’t worry. Were you in the shower?”
“How do you know?” you frown.
“You literally are in a towel?”
You lower your eyes on your body and facepalm mentally. If you had one pound every time you humiliate yourself in front of her, you would have been way richer by now.
“Oh shit. Can you wait for a second?”
She hums and you put your phone on the bed to put a shirt and some panties, mentally insulting yourself. You take the time to take a big breath before going back in your bed and taking your phone in your hand.
“Are you still in bed?” you ask, curious about the black screen.
“No, I’m still in my room though. I just… I don’t know. It was stupid to me to call you in FaceTime.”
“Don’t worry. How are you feeling?”
“I’m tired. Like mentally tired. Being at home made me realize that I don’t have a lot keeping me at London right now.”
That hurt. But you don’t say anything, planting your nails deep into the skin of your palms.
“What are you talking about? You have friends here; the girls of the team love you. And the fans too.”
“The fans aren’t really happy of me right now, I’m not able to score a lot and making my job right. I keep disappointing everyone.”
“You have the right to feel a little uneasy, that doesn’t take away from you what you achieved those last months, you know.”
Caitlin doesn’t answer, but you hear her sight a little bit. You don’t know if it’s something to hide some tears and you feel your heart break a little imagining that. You let several seconds pass before talking again.
“What can make you feel better right now?”
“For real? One of the brunches we eat.”
You smile hearing that. The place next to her house became one of your favorite spots to eat together. You really love it too, maybe because you share a lot of secrets and laughs here.
“Really?”
“Yeah, why?”
“Nothing.”
You are lying. An idea had already pop in your head and you feel your brain running while you’re planning something in your head. Caitlin knows you enough to realize that you are up to something. You hear some shuffling, and you imagine that Caitlin just sits on her bed.
“What are you thinking?”
“Nothing” you answer, smiling.
“Y/N. Don’t you dare do something stupid.”
You did. The morning after the call, you went to the restaurant, took Caitlin usual command, and jump in the jet who belongs to your company. You don’t usually use it for long trip like this, but you wanted to be in Australia as soon as possible.
You feel a little bit stupid with your suitcase and the bag where Caitlin’s food is. You ask for it to be wrap carefully and explain that you want to take it on a trip, without mentioning it was a very long trip. Thanks to the fridge, you are sure that you won’t poison Caitlin.
You told to Leah that you have an urgent meeting somewhere in Australia with a possible investor that you can’t ignore. She’s a little bit gutted not to be able to pass New Year with you, but you promised to bring her some Lamington to eat with her tea. In fact, you’re not really lying, you do have someone who is interested by your company in Australia. You just aren’t really obliged to travel here to talk to him.
You swallow with difficulty when you are in front of Caitlin’s porch, hopping that you won’t have to face her mother or her sister. You didn’t mention to Caitlin that you were coming, so if she wants you to go away, you just will. You still have some things to do in Australia, you weren’t totally lying to Leah. You just hide the fact that your priority was to see Caitlin.
You take a big breath before knocking on the door. This is a bad idea. Maybe the worst idea you never had. Why are you so good in your job and so stupid when it concerns the girl you are in love with?
But you don’t have the possibility to stress even more, because soon the door is opening. Caitlin looks at you like you are a hallucination or something.
“Um. I have a delivery for miss Foord?”
You let your suitcase in the car you rent, so you just have the bag with the food in your hand. You lift it to show it to her and it doesn’t take her more than a second to recognize the logo.
“Y/N, what the hell?” she mumbles, taking it in her hand.
“I… Uh. Well, I have stuff to do in Australia for the company and I thought that because I’m on this part of the globe, it could be great to please you.”
You’re lying. And very bad. Caitlin is looking at you like you are crazy, and you can’t blame her, you made a 24 hours journey to take her some breakfast and see her. She’s not supposed to know the truth, but you feel like she has some suspicions. You feel yourself blush and offer her a small smile.
“I better go. Enjoy your food and see you later.”
Maybe you’ll go let yourself die in the middle of the Australian’s desert. With a little luck, some snake or scorpions are going to come to bite you and you will die in atrocious suffering.
“No, wait!”
She grabs your arm with her hand, and you turn in her direction. She’s looking at you with a strange gaze, that you don’t know from her.
“Do you want to drink something? We don’t have Earl Grey, but I still can make you a tea if you want to.”
“Ok” you smile softly.
Caitlin doesn’t let your arm go and took you inside. It’s very quiet and after several seconds you ask her if her mother or sister are here. She answers no, her sister is now leaving with her fiancé and her mother is working today. You nod, secretly relieved to know that you won’t have to face Simone for now. You’re pretty sure that she understood when you saw her the last time the real feelings you have for her daughter.
“Where are you staying?” Caitlin asks while you look at her making you a cup of tea.
“At Park Hyatt”
“In Sydney?”
You hum and she frowns while giving you the cup of tea. It’s fuming and because you are drinking a lot of tea, she knows that you like it with sugar and milk.
“And you wanted to go back in Sydney just after giving me the brunch?”
“Brunch that you aren’t eating, by the way.”
Realizing it, Caitlin takes the bag one more time before taking out the different packages. She still looking at you discreetly, but you busy yourself by drinking your tea.
New Year 2022-2023 – The New Beginning
Caitlin proposes to you to stay at her home and not to go to your hotel, but you refused. You don’t want to bother Caitlin or her mother. That doesn’t mean you don’t see Caitlin; in fact, you see her every day for several hours.
She even invited you to come to the party her friends are making for the New Year. You accepted, after asking her several times if she’s sure that you won’t be a burden. The third time you ask, she threatened to knock you out with her vegemite pot, so you stopped.
And when you’re not with Caitlin, you work. You don’t have the possibility to see your brother who is on the other side of Australia. You almost lost consciousness when you learned that it takes 41 hours by car to get to Perth. So, you promise Jacob that you will see him before going back to England. Still with your jet.
You call Leah and your mother every day, but you are still focused on your goal to make Caitlin comes back to London with you. She seems a little down to be honest, but she seems to be better day after day. It gives you hope.
“Would you like to stay her to sleep tonight?” Caitlin asks on the 31th December while you were sitting next to her on the couch.
“Oh… I don’t know, I still have my hotel room.”
“Come on, it’s like 2 hours from here. And if you drink, I would rather that you stay here. My Mother will sleep in one of her friend’s houses anyway.”
“Yeah, ok” you mumble. “Wouldn’t let you all alone I case you’ll be scared.”
You can see Caitlin’s smile from the corner of your eyes. You hate the pleasant feeling with the fact that she seems to care about you. One thing is sure, this trip doesn’t help you about how in love you are with this girl.
You never talked so much with Caitlin before now, and you never were so close of her. Like right now, you are watching TV and Caitlin’s legs are on yours. You put your hand on the knees of the Australian like it’s nothing, mechanically drawing shapes on it. Sometimes she put her head on your shoulder, and you have to concentrate yourself to stay cool about it.
You grab something to eat before going to take a shower and prepare for the party. You know that they would have been pictures of the night so you tell Leah that Caitlin invites you to pass the night with her and her friends, you know your sister would have been worried to learn that you are alone tonight. Or sad. And you don’t want any of it.
To be honest, you haven’t taken an outfit for the party, you thought that you would be alone in your hotel room. So, you have to shop in Sydney to find the right one. You were getting ready in Jamie’s old bedroom and were looking at yourself with skepticism when Caitlin comes to knock on the door.
“Can I come in?”
“Yep” you simply answer.
She enters the room, and you want to cry. You always had something for her with her hair down and with the outfit she chooses, she’s just breathtaking.
“You look stunning” you say, without thinking about the consequences.
You are surprised to see her blush and hide your smirk by finishing to style your hair.
“Can we take a picture for my sister?” you ask to the Australian woman.
She nods and you briefly hesitate between a selfie or a mirror picture. You choose the second one, posing with a smile and the V-form with your fingers while Caitlin is sticking out her tongue.
You send the picture to Leah with Caitlin looking above your shoulder. The proximity makes your heartbeat faster, but you try to keep it cool one again.
“Are you ready to go?”
You follow Caitlin outside and in the Uber you command to go to her friend’s house. Knowing you both will be drinking, it’s safer this way. You already met some of Caitlin’s friends during your stay and they all are very friendly. But tonight, they will be more of them. The house is pretty crowded already when you arrived, and you are relieved to feel Caitlin grabs your arm.
“Stay next to me, yeah?”
You thank the World for Caitlin being a little shy at first and making her able to understand that you might not feeling ok surrounded by a lot of stranger people. You take the excuse to cross the house to slip your hand in hers. Her hand is soft and warm, and you miss the feeling when you have to let her go.
Caitlin introduces you to some of her friend’s you haven’t met for now. And if you notice the interested and non-subtle look of one of them, you act like you don’t realize it at first. But then, she starts to talk to you so much that you almost don’t have the possibility to pass time with Caitlin.
At some point, you even lose sight of her. And you don’t like the idea, what if someone get close to her? In the way you dream of it? You don’t know if you would support it to be honest, not after being so close of her.
“Come on, let’s dance!” Julia tells you, taking you away of your thoughts.
She takes you on the part of the house being dedicated for the dancefloor and you follow her without saying anything. You look around to see if you can see Caitlin, but it seems like she’s not here. You distract yourself by dancing with Julia who is a pretty good dancer to be honest.
At some point, she comes closer to you to be able to be heard through the loud music. Her hand is on your hips and her mouth right next to your ear.
“It’s a shame that you live so far away. I really would like to know you better.”
You sigh internally, wondering how someone can flirt with you with such facilities when you can’t even make a hint for Caitlin to understand how much you care for her. You don’t have time to answer anything, because there is suddenly someone taking your arm and you recognize the softness of those hand before turning around.
“Mind if I take her back?” Caitlin asks.
Julia raises both of her hand in sign of surrender with a smile. She says something like “Talk to you later” but you don’t really listen to her, your eyes being plunged in Caitlin’s one.
She looks upset, but her voice is calm when she speaks to you.
“I’m going outside. Would you come with me?”
“Sure” you smile softly.
She hadn’t let go of your arm, but you pass your other around it to be sure not being separated from her during your journey to the door. You feel pathetic but you’ll do anything to be able to be close from her. Everyone seems to be here by now and the house is very crowded. With the music, the laughs, and the discussions, going outside is finally a good idea.
There is no one in the garden and the fresh air makes you shiver. But you prefer to be concentrated on Caitlin who has a wrinkle between her eyebrows from frowning. She sits on a low wall, and you follow her to stand next to her, looking at the moon to forget how much you want to touch her.
“Are you ok?” you ask after several minutes of silence.
“I am” she only answer, looking at the horizon.
It seems to you that she is not, but you don’t say anything else. You thought that she asked you to come with her to talk or something, but it seems like you were wrong. Caitlin doesn’t stay silence for long though, turning suddenly in your direction.
“No, in fact I’m not.”
“What’s up?”
“I’m trying to figure out things, and I can’t. And I really need to do it now because otherwise I think I’m really going to become crazy.”
She seems angry and desperate at the same time. She’s talking with her arms, a thing that she usually doesn’t. Hopping to help her to relax a little, you come near her, putting your hand on her knee.
“You can tell me everything, you know that right?”
She sighs, passing a hand on her face. You have the feeling to understand what she think, and that it’s the fact that she doesn’t know where to begin.
“I just… You came here from your appointment but you brought me food just because I mentioned the day before.”
“Yes” you confirm quietly.
It’s maybe better for you not to precise that you went to your appointment because you came here. This feels maybe a little creepy.
“And you told me that you start writing me and talking to me more because you heard by Leah that I was struggling after my breakup with Lia.”
“Yes” you say again.
“Why did we stop talking by the way? It looks like suddenly we grow apart?”
You shrug only, not knowing what to answer to her. You obviously take care not to cross her eyes when you answer.
“Why did you come back anyway? After my breakup?”
“Because I care for you” you answer, looking at her carefully.
“I think I need to know how much you care about me” she says slowly, and you are happy to be in the dark because your cheeks are bright red. “Please, Y/N. Because sometimes I feel like you like me as a friend and sometimes, I feel like there is more than that. But when I tell myself that, you kind of back off and everything is strange and blur again. Just like tonight, I thought that we would pass the night together, but you kept dancing with Julia and I understand because she’s fun and beautiful. But I hated to see you with her, and everything is… blur. And I really need to understand.”
It's your turn to stay silence, because where the hell could you start. You are not closed to answer to her questions, but you are scared because what you have seems so fragile to you.
“Are you interested in me more than a friend?” she finally asks.
Well, maybe you should have talk before because this question is very difficult to answer. Not because you don’t know the answer but because it can change anything. You swallow your saliva with difficulty before answering. You can’t lie to her.
“Yes. I am.” you mumble.
You hear Caitlin taking a big breath before expiring and you just can’t look at her. You hear the people inside getting excited and you wonder if it’s because it will soon be midnight.
“Why didn’t you say anything?” Caitlin asks quietly.
“Because I care about you! At first you were in a relationship, and you seemed so happy in it and why in the world would I be between someone and their happiness? Then you broke up with Lia and you seemed so sad and so lost, and I didn’t want to take advantage of you in any way.”
You were talking fast, and loud, the feelings of all of it taking over the rest. You were struggling too, so much, but it was easier anyway to keep all of those feelings inside.
“And now? Why didn’t you say anything?”
You sigh and shrug. You just admitted that you were basically in love with her since day one, what can be worse than that anyway?
“Because I prefer to have you in my life as a friend than to take the risk to lose you.”
There is a moment of silence and just before Caitlin start to talk again, you hear the other people starting to count the seconds before midnight and the New Year.
“You are an idiot.”
10… 9… 8…
You hear Caitlin talk and even if the words could have been harsh, you have the feeling that she is smiling. You just have to look at her to see that she actually is, not her big toothy smile, but the small one. Her smirk.
“What?” you ask.
“You’re an idiot, Y/N Williamson.”
7…6…5…
Caitlin jumps from the small wall she was sitting on to come closer to you. You are frozen, you just watch her move to be right in front of you. You can smell her perfume, see how much her eyes are blue. She looks at your eyes too, before that her eyes drop on your lips.
4…3…2…
She cups your jaw with her hand, so tenderly that you just want to melt only with that gesture. Your heart almost went out of your body when you realize that she’s leaning to you, still letting you the possibility to back off if you want to.
You don’t want to.
1…0
Just when your lips met, the firework of the city irrupts in the sky, being a pretty good metaphor of what you’re feeling inside right at this moment. You are finally kissing the girl you are in love with and she’s kissing you back. She even put her hand in your back to press you against her while her other hand left your jaw to be on your neck.
When the air became an issue, you press your forehead against hers, without being able to suppress the big smile on your face. When you open your eyes, you see that she’s looking at you, offering a shy smile.
“Do you want to go home? To talk about all of this?”
“Talking?” you smile softly.
“Well, maybe kissing too, a little bit.”
16 August 2023 – The World Cup
You shouldn’t feel that way. It’s the semi-finale of the Women World Cup in Australia and your national team, England just won it place for the finale against Spain. You distractedly prevent your sister from jumping from excitement, so as not to make her knee injury worse. You would probably have been happier about the results if Leah were on the pitch, to be honest.
You are looking at your girlfriend’s silhouette, sitting on the floor. You can’t express how much you would like to go on the pitch and hug her tightly. You know how much this game meant for Caitlin and the rest of her team. Seeing her away from you from only several meters when you weren’t able to see her from almost two months is hard too.
You chose to hide your relationship with Caitlin to anyone around you, except Caitlin’s mother who definitively can read way to easily into people. So, you weren’t able to explain to your sister why you felt so moody those past days, the distance between you and Caitlin being hard to deal with. You can’t explain how much you missed her. Even if you call each other every day, it wasn’t the same.
You were busy helping Leah with her injury though, taking her to every single of her appointment, letting Lia Wälti doing it when you weren’t able to. Since Caitlin left, you went to live to Leah’s. And when your big sister told you that she was coming to Australia to the match, you came too. You even were able to see your brother this time.
After the game, Leah took you to the locker room to meet her teammates and you hug the ones playing to Arsenal. And Alessia Russo, who is coming for the new season too. You were talking to Mary Earps when you feel your phone buzz in your pocket. Excusing yourself, you get out the locker room to answer when you see Caitlin’s ID on the screen.
“Hello?”
“Hi. Are you still in the stadium?”
“Yes. Where are you?”
“I just went back to my hotel room. Everyone is so sad, I can’t look at them right now.”
You pout, hearing that said sadness in Caitlin’s voice too. You can easily imagine her on her bed, still her Matilda’s jogging.
“I’m so sorry Babe” you whisper in your phone, looking around you to be sure that no one is around. “You played great and I’m so proud of you.”
“Thanks” she mumbles before adding “I miss you.”
“I miss you too, so so much. When are you going back to London?”
“Two days after the game against Sweden. They still want to make a celebration about all of it in Sydney. Are you still staying to watch the finale?”
“Yes, Leah got us tickets. I’m going back the day after though; would you like to go back with me instead?”
She hums only and you’re not sure that she really understands what you ask her. You are not angry or hurt anyway, you know that she has to deal with the lost and the sadness of it. You just want to make her feel better.
One hour later, you were waiting for her to answer to you in front of her door. You managed to sneak inside the hotel and left Leah with Keira and Georgia. You are not sure that she realized you were missing, so happy to be able to pass time with some of her closest friends.
You knock again when you realized that no one is answering, not too hard. You don’t want to attract anybody’s attention. You were tense, scared to be seen by someone. Thanks God, Caitlin finally opens her door and looks at you like she’s seeing a ghost.
“Are you alone?” you whisper.
“Yes, but…”
Just like her mother would say, no but. You entered the room and immediately pass your arms around her neck to kiss her. Caitlin needs several seconds to realize what is happening before kissing you back.
“What are you doing here?” she asks gently when you release each other.
“I missed you. And you are sad and being just dozens of meters away from you without being able to talk to you killed me.”
Caitlin smile sadly, taking your hand to make you sit on her bed. Unlike you were thinking, she changed her clothes and is wearing a short with a hoodie. It feels very soft when you take her against you to hug her. You close your eyes, letting yourself invade by her sent.
“I was looking at you every time I was able to. You are hot in a jersey, but yellow would have suits you better than white.”
She pulls gently on the white t-shirt you’re wearing, a number eight with Williamson on the back, of course. You smile softly, kissing her temple. She snuggles closer to you, passing on of her leg on your own.
“Have you eaten something?” you ask.
“Nah. I’m not really hungry for now.”
“What about a bath?”
“I already took a shower.”
“Ok, I’m asking the question again. What about a bath with me?” you ask after a sigh.
You feel her smirk against you, and she sit on the bed to be able to look at you.
“You mean I’ll have the possibility to get you away from this horrible jersey and having you naked against me by the same move? I’ll be crazy to say no.”
You roll your eyes and throw a cushion at her before getting up from the bed. You then go to the bathroom to start running the water, waiting patiently to find the right temperature. You check your phone just to be sure that Leah isn’t looking for you when the tube is getting filled, and then you go back to Caitlin in the room.
“It’s ready when you are Babe.”
You give her both hands to help her to get up from the bed, which she doesn’t hesitate to take. But, as she gets up from the bed, she’s not following you to the bathroom like you thought she would. She passes her arms around your shoulder, holding you tight against her.
Understanding what she needs, you hold her back, even firmer against you. You are higher from several centimeters from her, not so much though. But you like the way she can easily hide her face in your neck without taking strange position. You rock her softly, kissing her cheeks and her hair several times, only to release her when she’s ready.
“Thanks for coming here for me” she whispers against your skin.
“Every time” you smile sincerely, looking tenderly at her.
She smiles back and cup your chin with her hand, before following you to the bathroom this time. You try to make her go alone in the tub; you really just want her to relax. But you finish with her in it, massaging slowly her back.
You know her team has special masseurs and that they are definitively way more skillful that you are. But seeing how your girlfriend has her eyes closed and let you do whatever you want, it must not be unpleasant. Except that the moan and whispers she’s making are making you think about something else, and please everyone forgive you, but you don’t had sex for two months and your girlfriend is naked in front of you.
“Why d’you stop?” Caitlin mumble with a pout.
You are glad that she’s sitting in front of you and that she can’t see your face, because you are bright red once again. You don’t want to take advantage of her, she’s upset and tired. You kiss her shoulder though, getting her hair out of the way. You love her with her hair down. Have you already mentioned it?
“Isn’t it time for great footballer to go to bed?”
She groans and turn around to face you. You are trying hard to just look at her face and not being distracted by everything else. But then she sits on your lap, and you have to get out of the water right now.
“Why are you so tense?” she frowns. “You may be the one needing a massage.”
You laugh softly and decide to be honest with her since not talking about your feelings made you lost time before. And you are a very bad liar. You bite your bottom lip before answering.
“I haven’t seen you in like two whole months, which mean that I haven’t touch you from two months, Caitlin. And you are naked on me and I’m really trying to be a good and caring girlfriend without sinful ideas because I know how much disappointed you are, but you make it very hard. Plus, the water is getting cold.”
The realization appears on her face, before being erased by mischievous smile.
“We still can put hot water in it.”
In the end, you add hot water on the tub several times. When you emerge from the bath, you are as tired as Caitlin, and she doesn’t need many pleas to make you stay with her. You were planning to go back to your hotel room that night to be honest. But you don’t. You answer to Leah who wrote you to tell you that she’s sleeping with the team and asked you if you want to go with her before going under the cover next to your Aussie’s girlfriend.
You lie face to face with her and smile when she starts to stroke your face.
“You are so beautiful.”
You roll your eyes and smile.
“You need to sleep Foord; you are starting to get delirious.”
She frowns and hit your forehead before leaning to kiss you. You smile against her lips and when she turns around to let you cuddle her from behind, you don’t need more than several seconds to fall asleep.
Hours later, you are waking up of your peaceful sleep by a deep voice with an Australian accent.
“Caitlin Foord what the hell?!”
Caitlin jumps next to you and you groan, hiding under the cover. Before you understand what is really happening, your girlfriend took Mackenzie Arnold by the arm to take her with her in the bathroom.
“Why the hell is there Leah Williamson half naked in your bed?” Mackenzie whisper-shout from the bathroom.
You roll your eyes, rolling on your back to grab your phone. It’s more than 9 in the morning, you really should have put an alarm on your phone. Thanks god, there isn’t message from Leah for now.
“It’s not Leah” you hear Caitlin answer.
“I have bloody eyes you know?”
Now that you realize what is happening, your heart is pounding. Mackenzie isn’t a close friend of Leah, but you know that her girlfriend is a good friend of Alessia who is a good friend to Leah. And you. But more to Leah. And you obviously can’t let anyone near Leah know about your relationship.
“It’s not Leah! … It’s her sister.”
There is a moment of silence and then
“You are in so much trouble. Leah is going to kill you.”
“I know! That’s why you have to shut your mouth Macca, even with Kristy.”
Mackenzie snorts and even you can’t see it, you easily can imagine Caitlin’s imploring look. There is a sigh, and you sit on the bed.
“Alright, I’m not saying anything. But you really should have chosen someone else to get over the lost.”
“It’s not just… We are together, actually. Like in couple.”
“Oooh that’s why you are always glued to your phone?”
“It’s not really the time to talk about that right now” Caitlin points.
She’s right, but you can’t help but smile at this. You are happy to have a good abonnement though, otherwise you will probably be poor because of your phone’s bill. There is some more noise, and the door handle goes down before the gesture suddenly stops.
“Not a word to Alanna too, please.”
“Promise.”
After that they are both out of the bathroom and you smile awkwardly to Mackenzie before she waves at you and get out of the room.
“I’m so sorry.”
Caitlin looks so tense that you almost feel sorry for her, but you are really stressed too. You shouldn’t have stayed the night here. Sighing, you get up from the bed to look for your clothes.
“It’s not your fault.”
Caitlin hums and while you are getting ready, a question pops suddenly in your head. You look up at your girlfriend who is sitting on the windowsill, looking outward. She’s still in her pj’s with her bed hair.
“Cait?” you call her softly.
She just turns her head in your direction. To distract yourself a little bit, you braid your hair while asking the question bothering you.
“I shouldn’t be concerned about Mackenzie coming in your room at random hours of the day or night, right?”
Her face goes soft, and she breaks the few meters between you to stop right in front of you.
“You don’t have anything to be worried about” she answers, slipping a rebellious lock of hair behind your ear. “No one is in my mind apart from you. Plus Macca has her own girlfriend.”
“Ok.” you smile before hugging her.
You stay in her arms longer than usual. Saying her goodbye is hard even if you know you will see her again in several days now.
April 2024 – The Fight
It was several months after the World Cup that Caitlin mentions for the first time to talk to Leah about your relationship. You were still hiding at that time, just like you are still doing now. You refuse to do it, saying that it was too early and explaining to her again why you can’t do that for now.
She understood your place but then she talked about it again in January, when you had to wait for several days to have a date to celebrate your first anniversary. The date being the First of January, you were obviously passing the day with Leah and your family. You gave her the same answer, it’s too soon and you don’t want to fight with your sister when she’s about to come back on the pitches from her injury.
But now, Caitlin is talking about it again and you can feel how much she’s frustrated about it. You try to make everything to distract her from that idea. You took her on trip just the two of you, using once again your jet to gain time. You are sleeping at her house every time you can. In reality you would love to be open about your relationship, in front of your friends and family at least. But you can’t take the risk to lose or disappoint your sister.
“It’s been a year and three months, Y/N.” Caitlin is saying, frowning like never before. “Leah is back on the pitch; we won the finale against Chelsea and your last deal went well and there is nothing holding us now. Well, except you.”
You sigh, pitching the base of your nose. You don’t want to fight with her. It happens almost never to be fair, only when you are talking about this.
“I can’t do it now, Babe. I just… I don’t know how Leah would react and I can’t take any risks.”
“You can’t or you won’t?”
“I can’t, Caitlin.”
She snorts and cross her arms on her chest. She’s hurt, you can see it. You try to take a step to touch her, but she backs up from two steps where you took one. Your arm falls stupidly against your hip.
“Come on, you can’t ask me to choose between you and my sister. I told you since the beginning why we can’t talk about it to people.”
“Why are we even together then?” she asks coldly.
The question hurts but you decided to ignore the feeling to stay honest to your girlfriend and make her understand your statement.
“Well I don’t know, because I love you?” you answer, raising an eyebrow.
“I don’t feel like it’s really the case right now.”
“Don’t say that” you frown too. “You know that I love you.”
But Caitlin is shaking her head and starts collecting her things around your living room. She’s shaking and you try once again to make her stop. Your arguments have never been deeper.
“Baby, please…” you start but she cuts you.
“No. I can’t do that anymore. I can’t stay with you if that means we’ll never evolve in any way. I just can’t.”
You feel numb when you look at her putting her shoes and taking her vest. You follow her like a lost puppy in the entrance, trying once again to grab her arm. You are successful this time and she stops her movements.
“Where are you going?”
“Home. Let go of me now, please.”
You just obey, slowly releasing her arm. There is a lump in your throat when you talk again.
“Are you breaking up with me?”
Your voice is hardly even a whisper, but Caitlin doesn’t miss it. Her blue eyes cross yours when she looks up over her shoulder.
“Talk to you soon.”
And then, she’s gone. You try to call her of course, texted her too, but she never answered. It’s with puffy red eyes and tears on her face that Leah finds you under your covers in your bed several hours later. She got scared when she doesn’t receive any answer to her text and just come to your home.
She hugs you at first, helping you to calm down to be able to talk and explain what is happening. You hesitated at first, before telling her everything. Well, almost everything because you never mentioned Caitlin’s name or the fact that she knows Leah.
“Tell me her name and I will go on her to make you cry like this.”
Your big sister managed to take you out from your bed to go to the living room and made you drink water and eat something. There are still tears running on your face from time to time, but Leah takes the time to wipe them gently each time.
“She just broke up with me. It doesn’t matter anymore.”
Leah makes a grimace before taking you back against her for a new hug.
“If she can’t wait for you, it means that she didn’t deserve you, Love.”
“Can we stop talking about her? Please.”
“Yeah, sorry.”
Leah puts the TV on, starting a random show and you try to concentrate on it. You can’t really, but you are still so thankful for your sister. The way she listened to you talking, holding you while you cry like a crazy woman without pushing you to know anything else makes you think that maybe she wouldn’t have scream if you talked to your love for Caitlin. But it’s too late anyway. Caitlin doesn’t want you anymore.
********
Two days after, on Saturday, Leah took you to the game. She almost hasn’t left your side, only to go to training. You are still working though, losing yourself in work. Like you always did before Catilin.
“What’s happening to your sister?” Lia asks Leah during the training.
Your sister turns in your direction, watching you several seconds before sighing. She’s aware that Caitlin isn’t far away from them, but she doesn’t know where your problem comes from, so she answers anyway. Caitlin is supposed to be your friend after all.
“She’s navigating through her first breakup” Leah answers, still looking at you.
Your mother is sitting next to you, she has her hand on your shoulder. Leah explained to your parents what was happening to you and of course your mother is looking for you like you are dying. You are looking at the pitch, but Leah can tell that you aren’t really looking. Unless you’ve discovered in yourself a passion for corner posts.
“Oh? I didn’t know she had someone.”
“Me neither” your sister sighs. “She’s like this since Wednesday but she doesn’t want to tell me who she is.”
Next to your sister, Caitlin gulps nervously when she crosses Steph’s gaze. Caitlin is a mess since Wednesday too. She took the decision to leave, but that doesn’t mean that it’s easy for her. She almost called you a thousand times. She missed you and wasn’t able to hide her sadness with the people who know her the best. Steph Catley is one of them.
“What?” Caitlin snaps at her teammate.
“Nothing” Steph answers, still looking at her suspiciously.
Caitlin went back to the bench nervously to grab something to drink, looking discreetly in your direction. Now your mother is talking to you, and you are looking at her, but Caitlin knows you very well and realizes how destroyed you look. Of course, it made her sadder than ever, but she still has her point. She wants to move in with you, be able to talk about her girlfriend to everyone one, she wants to take you on date in London and not only seeing you in one of your apartments. She wants to be able to walk holding your hand where you both live, not in the other side of the world. She wants to be able to take a plane without needing to hide in the airport.
You were hopping that Caitlin will be benched today, but she’s starting just like Leah. Which means that you will have to look at her for 90 minutes, knowing that you lost her.
It’s a great game to be honest, and while your mother feed you with fries and chicken nuggets (it’s a family thing) you are able to distract yourself enough not to cry while watching your ex-girlfriend.
Leah is sub at the 78th minute and Caitlin is still playing. You would have preferred for her to go on the bench too, particularly when she got hurt five minutes after that. The tackle wasn’t clean at all and you know right away that Caitlin is hurt. Like really hurt. You don’t need to see the stretchers coming for her, you don’t need the concerned looks of her teammate or Katie shouting at the girl taking Caitlin down.
You are up of your seat instantly, trying to have a better look of what is happening. They take longs agonizing minutes to get Caitlin out of the pitch and you run in the locker room in hope to be able to see her. But you just run into Leah.
“I’m going to the hospital to be with her” your sister explains to you. “I’m not allowed to go with her to the ambulance so I’ll take my car.”
“Can I come with you?”
“Sure.”
You are relieved that she doesn’t question you, but once again Caitlin and you are supposed to be friends. Even close friends. You follow Leah to the parking, and she’s ignoring the fan calling her name for the first time. You are so nervous that you want to throw up and you are glad that your sister isn’t talking, otherwise you are not sure that you will be able to contain yourself.
One of the Arsenal’s medics is waiting for you when you arrive, and he takes you into a private waiting room. From now, you just have to wait. Sitting next to Leah, you put your head on her shoulder and are glad that her cuddle instinct is so high when she passes her arm around your waist to hug you. You really don’t deserve her love; you were lying to her from months now.
Leah was scrolling on her phone for what feels like hours when someone comes in the waiting room.
“Are you here for miss Foord?” the medic asks.
“We are” Leah answers while getting up. “How is she?”
“Right. So, her leg has a doble fracture, but those are sharps break so she normally doesn’t need any surgery. She’s in a lot of pain though, so we give her something to help her. She also has a big bruise on the knee, but it will resolve itself. Would you like to see her?”
“If it’s possible, yes” Leah nods.
“Only one person for now.”
Your sister turns to you and you shrug, trying your best to smile at her. You would kill to be able to see Caitlin right now, but she doesn’t know that you are here. And you’re not sure that she wants to see you. Probably not.
“Go. I’ll text or ring her mother.”
Leah nods once again and follow the male nurse to Caitlin’s room. There are strange machines in the room, but Caitlin is up.
“She’s under drugs. She might be a little out of it” the medic whispers to Leah before leaving the room.
The noise of the door makes Caitlin turns her head in Leah’s direction. The blonde gives her a smile and take a chair to sit next to her.
“Oh. Wrong Williamson.”
“What?” Leah laughs softly while sitting up.
Caitlin is speaking like she’s half-asleep but when she looks at Leah, your sister feels like she knows very well what she’s saying. At least that the words are real.
“I would rather see your sister.”
She shrugs and wince, the drugs making her head feels fuzzy.
“Well she’s here, I still can ask her to come if you want” Leah proposes kindly.
“She’s here?”
The surprise on Caitlin’s tone is astonishing to Leah, who frowns a little while looking at her friend. She knows how much time you pass together, well for the brunch or this kind of things. Not really that you passed almost every night together when you are in London. Unless it’s a Monday and you are at Leah’s.
“Yeah?”
Caitlin stays quiet for several seconds, before sighing and looking at the window. The view isn’t amazing to be honest, just the parking lot of the hospital.
“She wouldn’t want to see me anyway. I fucking broke her heart.”
“What are you talking about?” Leah frowns deepens.
She doesn’t mean to take advantage of Caitlin under drugs, but it’s about you and you are the person who is the most important in her life. It’s not a one-side thing, you are Leah’s person as much as she’s yours.
“We had a fight Wednesday because I wanted to tell you about our relationship or at least that she really thinks about telling you. But like usual she had excuses, and I just couldn’t take it anymore. I love her so much it’s hurt. I just want to be able to hold my girl in public and tell the world how wonderful she is. Who travel the world to bring someone fucking pancake? We were amazing and now we are nothing and a fucking prick just broke my fucking leg and I just want to her to hug me. But she can’t because I fucking wasn’t patient enough with her.“
Leah is stunned. And not only because of Caitlin’s unusual use of swear words. She never though a single second that Caitlin and you were more than just friends. Or that the Australian was the reason of your tears for the last days.
“I know that she loved me, but she loves you even more Leah. She was so scared to lose you. But now I lost her. And I’m really tired.”
“You should sleep a little maybe” Leah mumbles.
Caitlin sighs and close her eyes.
“I’m going to see my sister, will you be ok alone a little bit?”
“Yeah” Caitlin breath before opening her eyes. “Will you tell her? That I love her?”
Leah hesitates some seconds before nodding and smiling softly.
“Yeah. I will.”
She watches the Australian woman closes her eyes and falling asleep as soon as her eyes are closed. Her mind is running, trying to understand what she just learned. She feels like she isn’t really here when she finds you still sitting on the waiting room. You immediately spot her concern look and get up from your chair.
“Is everything ok? I just wrote to Caitlin’s mother that she will be fine?”
“Yeah, she just fell asleep.”
You let a shaky breath pass your lips, really relieved. Your sister still looks pale, but maybe it’s because of those white walls?
“She has a message for you though, that she asked me to tell you.”
“What is it?”
You are curious to know and look at your sister who cross her arms on her chest while looking at you.
“She asks me to tell you that she loves you.”
Well now you might be whiter than Leah. Your big sister watches you become paler than ever, she watches your eyes widen too and how you open your mouth several times to talk without anything coming out.
“What were you thinking Y/N, really?”
You could cry right now. You passed months perfectly hiding your relationship to Leah, giving you probably the onset of an ulcer due to anxiety, and some drugs from a public hospital is going to break all the efforts you made?
“Leah, I’m so sorry” you began, begging while looking at her. “Please, I never wanted to hide something to you, I swear.”
You were panicking. You just lost your girlfriend and now you are about to lose your sister too. The two most important people in your world, sorry to your mom.
“I just don’t understand” Leah says, shaking her head.
You probably are going to have a panic attack.
“I…”
“I don’t understand” Leah cuts you “How you might have thought that I will be mad at you for being with someone who made you happy?”
You don’t understand and you probably don’t look very intelligent with the way you are looking at Leah. She’s still frowning, but you realize that she isn’t mad at you, she just seems lost.
“You said several times that I wasn’t allowed to flirt with one of your teammates, Le” you point, whispering.
“I said flirt because I didn’t want some of hormonal footballer taking advantage of you! Being in love is something else.”
“You are not mad at me?” you ask shyly.
“Of course not, you idiot. I love you more than anything, your happiness is what comes first.”
Leah rolls her eyes and reach out to you. You don’t hesitate to go in her arms, relieved by the unexpected turn of events. The nose in her hair, you whisper :
“I’m sorry for keeping things away from you.”
“It’s ok” Leah says softly, squeezing you a little harder. “I’m sorry you were in so much pain.”
She kisses your cheek and let you go, not without taking you by the shoulders to have a better look at you.
“We are going to make things better between you and Caitlin now, if it’s really what you want. Ok?”
“I’m not sure she’s still interested. She really is mad at me.” you shrug.
“Please. She told me I’m the wrong Williamson, if she doesn’t take you back, I’ll send her back to Sydney.”
********
When Caitlin wakes up almost three hours later, the sun was gone and the room is almost in the dark. There is a small light on the nightstand, and she needs some seconds to remember where she is and why her leg is hurting like hell. She groans and try to roll on her side, her back sore to have been in the same position for hours now. But her leg hurts more, and she opens her eyes, grimacing slightly.
Then she sees you and froze several seconds.
You were already looking at her, like you were doing since you entered the room. She doesn’t seem really peaceful while sleeping and your heart hurt to see her in pain.
“Hi” you whisper, in case her head is hurtful.
“Did I really told your sister than I’m in love with you or was I dreaming?”
You look at her several seconds, trying to see in her eyes if she’s stressed or anxious before answering.
“You ask her to tell me that you love me, but I guess it’s the same thing.”
“Shit. I’m sorry.”
“It’s ok” you say, coming closer to the bed. “It’s not what bother me now. How are you feeling?”
“Ok, I guess. Thanks god we are at the end of the season. The doctor said I will be ok to play for the Olympics.”
“That’s a good new”
Caitlin hums and you look at your hands, lost in your thoughts. It’s maybe a good think that she hasn’t ask you for now to get out of her room, but you chose not to push your luck too much.
“I uh, I’ll let you in peace now. I wrote to your mother and your sister to reassure them, but Beth came with your phone and other stuff like one hour ago” you explain while getting up. “You can write to them if you want to.”
“Oh… No wait, please. Can you stay? Just a little bit?”
You hesitate for several seconds, looking at Caitlin before answering anything. You want to stay, of course. You finally slowly sit down again on the chair.
“Thanks” she mumbles. “Look, about what I said to Leah…”
“It’s ok” you say again, shrugging. “She isn’t mad.”
“No?”
You shake your head, playing with your nails and fingers without looking at her. Caitlin knows how much Leah means for you so you’re pretty sure that she would have feel guilty if Leah was mad at you.
“Is she not mad because she knows that we are no longer together, or would she have been even if we were still together?”
“I think she would have been ok. If that was the case.”
You hear Caitlin takes a deep and big breath, making you look at her. You can’t read the feeling on her face, so you are happy to see her talking again. You don’t know what behavior you can have with her now, are you still able to ask her all the questions you want?
“I don’t know how to say that” Caitlin sighs. “But is there a chance that we maybe try to make things better between us?”
“Better like in being friends again?”
You see Caitlin rolling her eyes and you understand quickly that you haven’t guess right. You are surprised to see a small smile on her face despite the situation you are in.
“How can you be so clever when it’s about your company and so obvious when it concerns relationships?”
You roll your eyes too, used to being criticized about your lack of ease in human relations when they do not concern your job.
“Yes, because you are the most sociable and none-shy person in the world yourself.”
“Touché.”
There is a silence, during which you are looking at each other.
“Can you forgive me for running away the other day?” Caitlin asks softly.
“Only if you forgive me for believing during all this time that my sister wouldn’t accept our relationship and how I was wrong.”
She smiles again and you smile back at her. You get up when she asks you to sit next to her by patting the bed next to her. That place being the other side of her injured leg, you oblige.
“I don’t know how explain how sorry I am. I shouldn’t have left like this.”
“I get it. It wasn’t a pleasant situation. But it doesn’t mean that I don’t love you or anything.”
“I know. I’m sorry.”
“I am too” you whisper.
After one second of hesitation, you put your head on her shoulder, and you close your eyes when she put her chin on your head.
“So, what now that Leah knows?” Caitlin asks.
To be honest, you don’t really know. Today was a lot of feelings to deal with and you don’t even know where to start. Your girlfriend (?) seems to understand what is happening in your head, because she kisses tenderly your temple before talking.
“What about I get out from here first?”
“That sounds good” you smile softly. “And from here, you come right to mine so I can take care of you.”
“Perfect.”
You watch the Aussie laying down on the bed and you turn on your side to be able to look at her better. With your finger, you are tracing random patterns on her arm. You know that she’s falling asleep but you need to ask the question.
“Cait?”
“Mh?” she answers, without opening her eyes.
“Are we back together? Like, are you my girlfriend again?”
She snorts and snuggle closer from you, already half-asleep.
“Yes we are. Weirdo.”
#woso imagine#woso x reader#woso fanfics#woso one shot#caitlin foord imagine#caitlin foord x reader#caitlin foord#leah williamson#leah williamson imagine
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can you do a platonic yandere teacher? like maybe the teacher kidnaps the darling (his fav student) because he has always wanted a child and you just seem like the perfect child to have! and he kinda gets pissed off if you mention your old family. Reader can be High school or Middle school age i don’t care which.
teehee, i hope you don't mind but i combined it with another another ask which was similar, i went to keep both aspects of the ask so there'll be two yandere characters, they can be a couple or just two people who live together, whatever you want.
once again, no names :P
Reblogs and comments are appreciated
Yandere Teacher and Yandere headmaster who used to argue all the time despite the fact that they live under one roof. Yandere teacher hates what the headmaster deems as necessary for the students and teachers while the headmaster hates how the teacher never listens to anything he says.
All the staff hate whenever a meeting is called, not because their day was disrupted, no, but because they have to sit and listen to these two arguing over the most stupid things.
They couldn't seem to agree on anything until they met you. Yandere teacher had always kept an eye on you, the one student in his class who used to submit everything on time, complete every assignment to perfection nd rather well behaved.
He usually hates having to explain himself over and over again but if you ask him to repeat something, he will, even if he has already gone though the topic like 100 times.
If by chance you don't do well on a test, he'll give you another assignment to make up for it, or be less harsh with his grading on that certain paper.
He'll let you disturb his free time if you have any doubts or topic you don't understand.
You've always been his favorite student, so well behaved, never causing a scene in class and doing everything he assigned you to the best of your abilities.
With all this in mind, there was no surprise when you decided to run for the President of the student council, with your track record, you were bound to be selected by the teachers*.
That was until he found out one student from a more well off family was planning to run as your rival and for once he went to the headmaster to ask for help.
The headmaster has always kept an eye on you, someone who managed to impress the Teacher who was known for being nitpicky with everything his students did. Of course, that wasn't the only reason, always participating in events, getting awards, representing the school in inter school events, all made him quite interested in what you could achieve within your school years.
Naturally the moment the Teacher came in, asking for you to be selected as the next president he agreed without hesitation,bringing down the reputation of a spoiled child in the eyes of the teachers was no problem for him.
It didn't take long for both of them to agree it would be better if you were staying with them, after all, being the child of the headmaster of one of the most prominent schools was nothing to scoff, that too along with a teacher who had years of experience and a well known reputation in the eyes of various boards.
Of course, being the student council president meant that you had lots of duties to attend to, ones which included you staying late in the school while most of the staff and teachers left, as such, it was quite easy for them to bring you the unfortunate news that your family perished in an accident, when in reality, they made sure to use their influence to make sure they'd never be found.
Under the disguise of being concerned for you, they'd offer to let you stay in their houses. They'd use the first week to make you forget your old family under the guise of giving yourself closure and giving you time to yourself.
They wouldn't rush anything, in time they'd start acting as if you had no other family except them, both of them would step in the role of your parents.
They'd do anything to keep you happy, learning all your likes/ dislikes, cooking whatever dish you wanted, helping you with whatever and buying you everything you ask for.
The headmaster is not someone who cares if you mention your old family, they don't matter because they're gone and as long as he has you with him, he doesn't care while the Teacher on the other hand, tends to get irritated if you mention your old family, he'll bear it to a point before he snaps and goes on a long lecture of all he's doing for you and how clinging onto the past is not good for you.
At that point the headmaster steps in and drags him aside to have a few words with him and he'll come back and apologise to you over his behaviour. The next time he goes on such a rant, one look from the headmaster and He'll stop talking.
Being the headmaster's child comes with a lot of perks, teachers giving you much more respect, students also making sure they don't upset you. If even after all that a teacher or student manages to do something that makes you upset, the headmaster deals with them personally.
*In schools over here, the student council is always decided by the teachers after a few rounds of interviews and 'tests'
#octo answers#yandere x darling#yandere x reader#tw yandere#octo writes#yandere#yandere scenarios#yandere imagines#yandere headcanons#yandere headmaster#yandere teacher#platonic yandere x reader#yandere platonic#platonic yandere#yandere x you#yandere x y/n#yandere writing
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a story in which katsuki's bratty son tries to blackmail his mother! how terrible
— characters. katsuki, reader, katsuma (the son)
— contents. fluff, katsuma is a little shit
— word count. 600
— authors note. GJFCK MFGVFDXK GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDOMESTICTRASFJNRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGJBJFNVDSLM
Your son is alot like his father, in good ways mostly.
He stands up for himself at school, and is mostly independent. For the most part, Katsuma was a pretty easy kid.
However, he can also be the most major little shit on the planet, much like in the situation you're in now.
He's learned what blackmail is, and he loves it.
You were in the kitchen, baking cookies, when you heard Katsuma’s voice from the living room. "Ma! What's this?" he yelled.
You turned to see your five-year-old holding the pregnancy test you had thrown away earlier.
Oh no.
Your heart skipped a beat. "Katsuma, where did you find that?" you asked, trying to stay calm.
"In the trash," he said with a mischievous grin. "I'm gon' tell Dad unless you give me extra cookies- and I wan' that brand new hero figurine at the store...AND I wan' my own bb gun- AND!!! I wan' a brand new pair of boo-"
"Katsuma." you sighed. You've known your son to be a major handful all his life, but also know realizing he did indeed have you in a tight spot.
"Katsuma, this is important. I wanted to tell your dad in a special way."
Katsuma pouted, crossing his arms. "Fine, but I still want extra cookies...and the figure...an' can I still have the bb gun?"
You sighed once more.
"Alright, you can have two extra cookies- AND the figurine... but you have to promise to keep this a secret for now," you said, hoping to buy some time.
"Deal," he said, his eyes gleaming with pride.
As you handed him the cookies, you couldn't help but feel frustrated, yet a bit amused. Katsuma was a lot like his father—brash, stubborn, and always wanting to be in control. You watched as he stuffed the cookies into his mouth, crumbs falling everywhere, and shook your head with a small smile.
Just then, you heard the front door open. Katsuki walked in, looking as intense as ever. "What's going on in here, hm?" he asked, sensing the tension.
Katsuma jumped in before you could speak. "Mom's got a secret, but she won't tell me!"
You shot a look at Katsuma, then turned to Katsuki. "It's not like that! I just…I found out something today and wanted to surprise you..."
Katsuki raised an eyebrow. "Yeah? What's that?"
Taking a deep breath, you decided it was now or never. "Katsuki, I’m pregnant. We're having another baby."
For a moment, he just stared at you, processing the news. Then, a rare, genuine smile spread across his face. it was sadly short lived, and replaced with a smirk instead. "Oh really?".
Katsuma looked between the two of you, his earlier mischief forgotten. "So, does that mean I get a little brother or sister to boss around?"
"Katsuma, you will not be bossing your them around." you said, ruffling his hair. "You have to be a good big brother, okay?"
Katsuma's eyes widened. "I’ll be the best big brother ever! Can I teach them how to play hero games?"
You chuckled. "Sure, but you'll also need to help take care of them."
Katsuki walked over and pulled you into a gentle hug. "I'm really happy, you know," he said quietly. "This is good news."
You relaxed into his embrace, feeling a wave of relief. "I was so nervous about telling you."
He pulled back slightly, looking into your eyes. "Why? You know I’m always here for you, no matter what."
Katsuma tugged at Katsuki’s pant leg. "Dad, does this mean we need to buy more baby stuff?"
Katsuki laughed. "Yeah, it does. And you can help pick it out."
"Good! Yknow dad...when we go to the store,I wanted to see if you could buy me a new figurine..or a bb gun...or a brand new pair of boo-"
"No."
"Oh.. DAMNIT!"
The rest of the evening was filled with excited chatter about the new baby. Katsuma kept asking questions about what it would be like to have a sibling, while Katsuki suggested names and joked about teaching the new baby how to be tough like him.
Later, after dinner, you all sat together in the living room. Katsuma was snuggled between you and Katsuki, half-asleep from all the excitement.
Katsuki looked over at you, his expression softer than usual. "You know, I never imagined myself having a family like this," he admitted. "But I wouldn't trade it for anything."
You smiled, feeling a warmth spread through you. "Me neither. We’ve come a long way, haven’t we?"
He nodded, reaching over to squeeze your hand. "Yeah, we have. And it’s only going to get better from here."
#mha x reader#bnha x reader#katsuki bakugou x reader#katsuki bakugou#katsuki x reader#bakugou x reader#bakugo x reader#katsuki x you#bakugou x you#bakugo x you#mha x you#bnha smut#mha smut
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Poison For Some
(Daryl Dixon x Reader) Masterlist
Description: Your deathly allergic to nuts and dinner in the prison leaves you running for medicine. Your abrupt departure confuses everyone, until your partner Daryl remembers of your allergies. Now it was 24 hours and you were no where to be found.
5.9k words
This runs personally in my life and will be based on my own allergies. It’s different for everyone but, this is mine. [Angst and Fluff]
Carol had made dinner like she did most nights. Winter approached and Rick was trying to put off using the canned goods for as long as he could. So, Carol decided to try and fill in some protein with almonds. She put it in the rice mixing it to whatever meat scraps we last had. Daryl was off in the shower at your demand. He had been hunting a lot more often trying to gather as much meat before winter. Coming back to the prison somehow dirtier than the last, you wouldn’t be surprised if he had rolled around in dirt for how much it cover him.
You sat at the table as Carol handed out portions. Glenn and Maggie were talking about a run they should make for Judith. Little thing needed more appropriate winter clothing. You told them you would go with, so you were just listening to their planning. The steamy bowl placed in front of you sent you happily smiling and thanking Carol for the food. Carol jokingly jabbed at you, “Swear the only way I could ever get a smile like that from you is food.” You scoff digging your spoon into the bowl and shoving it into your mouth. You talk with a mouth full,
“It’s the best way to my heart!”
You chew feeling a unique piece in your mouth. Thinking maybe the rice clumped together. Carol brought you from your thoughts, “That’s why you got yourself a hunter I see.” You chuckle at that, eyes moving to your bowl. You pushed it around spotting what you felt in your mouth, it was something pale. You swallowed the growing saliva in your mouth. Realization hit you like a truck, you sprung up from your seat in a panic. Almond peal off, something in the past you had learned the hard way had nuts in it.
You had never had to use an epiPen before, Benadryl was always what you had to chug before a epiPen was ever thought of. A mental clock started ticking. You didn’t have much time before this nut you just ate starts killing you. You didn’t know you were moving before you were already out the door. Nabbing a set of keys before sprinting to the gate. Other were surprised at the clear shock and outburst you had. You had gone out the door before they even stood to follow. When they got out the door you left the gate to the courtyard open and they saw you sprinting to the exit gate. That brought them into gear yelling and chasing after you. You didn’t have much time. Pill or preferably liquid Benadryl would only work in the early stages of your reaction. You would guess 30 minutes before it was a lost cause.
Considerably to others with the allergy you were lucky. While it was deadly you had more time and didn’t have to pull out a shot of adrenaline every time to fix it. You pulled both gates open not even attempting to close them before getting into one of the run cars. You peeled off before anyone could question you. They all yelled and waved their arms. They couldn’t believe you. The sounds of the tires screeching was emphasis to your haste. They stood at the open gate seeing the car zoom down the road. A few walkers emerged from the woods causing them to try and close the gate as fast as they could.
You white knuckle the steering wheel attempting to take slow breaths. You resisted the urge to scratch at your skin knowing you must have hives by now. A ball seemed to form in your throat. You have been attempting to locate a EpiPen and Benadryl for a while now. You had some before the farm fell and lost it to the herd. You even asked Glenn to keep an eye out for Benadryl on runs. You felt tears prick at your eyes but forced it away knowing crying would only make it harder to breathe. You were scared but you had to think fast in a last ditch effort of survival. If any pharmacy or store you have checked didn’t have it maybe a household was your best bet. You knew you wouldn’t be able to look through many houses so it was a risky gamble. You know of a neighborhood your group has yet to explore. So with a race against time, that’s where you’re headed.
You had mentioned in passing at the beginning of the quarry of your allergy. Only ever talking about it again with Daryl. He hated peanut butter and you said while you’ve never had it because you’ll die, the smell was gross and over powering. Getting a grunt and “Ain’t missing much.” from him. He also may have teased you about how ‘something as simple as a nut could take you down.’ You were always good about your allergies, hence not ever needing an EpiPen. Something your mother was grateful for not wanting to stab you with a shot. It didn’t seem like a big deal at the time. While it could sneak up on you it was always solved somewhat quickly. Maybe you should have made a bigger deal about it.
Daryl POV
He had just gotten a shirt on when he heard rushing and calling for his name. He peaked down from his and your cell to see a worried Beth. As soon as she saw him she was nervous and stammered out, “Y/n! Something… we were just sitting then- she’s gone! She booked it out the prison randomly!” Daryl felt his heart drop and he quickly made his way downstairs to where everyone was now piling back in from outside. Rick ran a hand in his hair as Daryl slid into the room worriedly, “The hells happening?! Where is she?!” He watch as everyone turned to the other not knowing the answer. Hershel tried to calmly tell Daryl, “We’re not to sure but she seemed pretty spooked…”
Daryl looked around about to go into a panic. He spotted a bowl spilt across a table. Maggie followed his eyes and started to explain what happened, “She was sitting there. Joking with Carol and she was fine! Then all the sudden she sprung up and ran for it.” His mind raced, he had to go after you but he couldn’t if he didn’t know where or why you were going in the first place. He turned to Carol a strained expression on his face, “What were you talking about?” Carol just shook her head worriedly and shrugged, “Just food. She was giddy as ever to eat is all.” Daryl looked back to the food sprawled out on the table, “What did you make?” Carol put her hands on her hips, the chatter from the others in the room seemingly felt dense with worry and confusion.
“Just the little bits of squirrel we had left with some rice with almonds.”
He felt the nerves in him burn. His ears flood with blood causing the noisy room to muffle. Understanding why you ran made him light headed. Others around him noticed him pale, and the shocked and panicked look you had before washed over his. He felt frozen, you went off to try and save yourself. Not taking a moment before running off to find Benadryl. Something he knows you, Glenn, and himself struggled to find. He felt like he was going to crash to the floor. He had no clue where you could have gone, and if you would ever come back. The edge of his vision darkened but he felt someone behind him steady him. It was Carl, but his father was the one to drag Daryl’s attention, “What’s happening Daryl? You know why she ran, where is she going?” He turned to look toward Carol,
“She’s allergic to nuts.”
Some gasps rang through the room, some questions flying up in the air. Carol nervously shook, words shakingly coming out of her mouth, “Oh my god, I killed her.” She sunk down to a chair a wave of nausea painted on her face. Hand covering her face as tears broke out, “I didn’t know- I remember peanuts maybe. It’s all m-my fault-t.” Glenn leaned over the table as he looked down, “Is that what Benadryl is for?” He seemed almost sick with himself that he hadn’t tried harder to look for it. The room had slowly grown quiet. A pained expression filled their faces as the gravity of the situation weighed on them.
Rick spoke trying to do what he did best, lead. He needed to control the situation and make a plan. He stood straight with arms crossed, “We need to figure out where she ran off. Then try and find some medicine to save her.” He turned to Hershel, “You have everything if it goes south?” Hershel was mid thought thinking maybe a endotracheal tube they had could keep you breathing long enough for medication. Daryl grunted and shook his head, frustrated but heartbroken, “It’s no use, we been looking for anything for her since the farm. She would have never had a chance if she didn’t ran off like she did.” He was angry at the thought, he could do nothing but hope wherever you go you find anything.
Rick spoke calmly trying not to set him off, “Her best bet is with us-“ much to his attempt Daryl roared in anger, “By the time we even made it anywhere let alone getting it back to her she would have been dead!” He clenched his teeth, “We haven’t even the slightest clue where anything for this is.” He now huffed getting emotional, “She did what she had to, she made the right call.” He looked back to a sobbing Carol, “We just hope she comes back now…” He spun around back to the cell he came. His back turned to everyone, the stone lodged in his heart finally crushed him. Swiping the curtain to the cell he looked through blurred eyes at the place you both shared.
He sank to the bed. The lasts words exchanged between you and him running in his mind. ‘Go shower so I can kiss you.’ You pushed him away into the hall. He smuggled remarked a ‘Always can kiss me in the shower.’ Watching you become coy with him at the implication. Always easy to get blood rushed to your face. You had surprised him growing ever more comfortable around him in there growing relationship. Grabbing his dirty tan shirt and pulling him into a kiss. A smile plastered on your face at his surprised one, you whispered, ‘More for when you’re clean.’ He isn’t sure when the relationship happened.
It was slow to happen but there had been to many times your eyes caught on each other. Then you slept closer to him when you had yet to find the prison. You had kissed him on the cheek before a hunt giving him it for luck. When he came back with a deer good luck kisses happened more. An arm throw around you there and then. You holding onto him while on his bike. Wasn’t til the prison when you nervously suggested sharing the same bed that he caved. That first night on a bed he kissed you. More so devoured you but he would deny that. You had never cuddled before that night either, waking up tangled into each other on the small bed.
The small bed he now cried in over the all to real possibility he had lost you. He was laid back arm across his face. His teeth clenched together to stop any pained noise to release from him. Emotion circling in him, regret, anger, heartbreak, he hadn’t even the chance to tell you how much he loved you. The fear always stopped the word from tumbling from him. He could only wait.
Your POV
It had taken you 10 minutes to reach the neighborhood you sought after. Given that you were driving faster than you normally were ok with. You quickly jump out the car running into one of the near houses. Your hands shook while fumbling with the door. Adrenaline pumping in you mostly likely helping your survival. You pushed through making quick work of any spots you could think of. Kitchen cabinets, bathroom drawers, purses. The fabric of your clothes rubbed your irritated skin any time you moved. You abandon the house and moved to the next. Your quick pace making it harder to breathe. You cough and swallow trying to relieve some of the pressure in your closing throat.
You upturned and ran sacked the next house just as you did with the other. Throwing bottles of random medication behind you as you increasingly became more desperate. You left that house looking through every room but one with a walker in it. Your eyes scanned the line of houses. Your heart ached with fear thinking you were about to asphyxiate to death. You had one more house left in you to search. You picked one that had a small bike in the overgrown grass. You moved as fast as you could while heaving. You couldn’t break down the door with the strength you had so you went through a window. You paused momentarily for any movement, hearing a lack of any you started.
Cabinet, drawers, bathrooms, now you stumbled up the stairs. Tears streaming down your face with a sense of defeat. You looked in the master bedroom knocking things over again finding nothing. You slowly moved down the hall to a kids bedroom. Glow in the dark stars on the roof. Tubs of toys filled the walls. Stuff animals filled the bed. You had removed your shirt due to its unwanted friction on your skin. Looking to the pink painted chipped walls, you shakingly come to terms with defeat. Sinking down to the floor resting against the bed frame. You look to walls covered in kids drawings. Gasping for whatever air you could bring in was the only sound in the still house.
You thought of Daryl, not having been together for long but you felt in your heart he was your everything. You didn’t have much in the world but then you had him. He didn’t have much either and you tried to not lessen that anymore with losing you. You failed but you hope he knew you tried. He was a big factor to why you were fighting this so hard. You looked to the end of the bed spotting a backpack. The little girls room you’ve been in must belong to a 1st grader. Maybe you could find a pencil and paper to right a proper goodbye. You gasped air while fiddling with the zipper. You looked for paper and a pen while you thought of what to say. You were at least glad you had kissed him the last you saw him.
Struggling to look in the back you poured the contents out on the floor in front of you. You couldn’t believe your eyes. A zip lock bag with a bottle of red liquid you were all to familiar with. You rip the back open spotting an old epinephrine pen with it. The bottle was small but was filled all the way. You managed to get the cap off despite struggling with the child lock. The disgusting bronze liquid flowed into your mouth. You resisted the urge to cough it up, it slowly trickled its way down your closing throat. You had downed a good bit of the bottle. It felt as if it numb the pain in your throat. A sense of relief flowed over you. You sat there still stunned as you slowly regained some breath. You lean your head back to rest on the bed behind you. You took it in, you felt shame at almost dying so easily but you were ok.
You looked back to the EpiPen you held not feeling the need to use it. It’s intended users name plastered on it, ‘Penelope Thompson, allergen Bees.’ Your skin still burned to the touch but you managed to flop back onto the small bed. Stuff animals falling to the floor. You held still trying to fully regain air in your lungs. Waiting to see if you had stopped the reaction. You laid sprawled out staring at the ceiling. Resisting the urge to scratch everywhere. The growing itch in your scalp caused you to squeeze your eyes shut.
You don’t know how long you laid there before feeling like you could breathe easily. No lump felt like it blocked your throat. You had decided to get up before it got dark, knowing everyone at the prison was worried sick. When you got up right exhaustion hit you. Benadryl main side effect being drowsiness. Considering you had just consumed a large amount of it, it weighed on you. It wouldn’t be safe to travel if you fell asleep at the wheel. You didn’t need just surviving a near death experience and then crashing the car into another one. You were met on your almost dying quota for one night you think. Moving the door closed and shoving a bookcase slightly to it was the best you’d get. As soon as you lay back down it crashed back into you. Struggling to even keep your eyes open you fell asleep despite the itch of your skin.
Your eyes slowly open. You didn’t move an inch or dream in your sleep. Felt like you blinked and it was pitch black outside. You bounced up to remember what had happened. Your hives seemed to be at a minimum and you felt back to normal. Expect the grogginess. You slept like a rock in your bones and muscles protest at your movement. Even though it was dark you decided to make your way back to the prison. A few walkers could be seen in the darkness but getting back to the car you’d be fine. After getting in the driver seat you rubbed at your eyes. You felt like you had way too long of a nap. You had no clock in the car and you sighed leaning back in the seat.
“I wonder how long I slept?”
Daryl POV
Hour after hour went by. Tension was high in the prison. Darkness started to fall over the prison. Daryl sat in a watch tower looking off to the empty road. He chewed his lips til a copper taste slipped into his mouth. A few hours after no return from you felt like the end of the world. You could very well be dead by now. Maybe you had even turned and started walking aimlessly. He wallow in his bed for those first few hours. Deciding recently just stand watch. Waiting and waiting maybe wasn’t the best thing to do. All the terrible things he could think the only thing keeping him company. A few people attempted throughout the night to talk him down tell him to get some rest. Coming up with any excuses why you were not back yet.
When dawn broke everyone except Herschel, Beth and Judith, were grouped in an attempt to locate you. Looking into possible supermarkets or pharmacies you might have tried finding medication. Every empty building with no sight of you felt like a lost hope. While even in the building, they looked for possible Benadryl or an EpiPen. With no luck to even finding the smallest bit of that. The consensus of you being gone was weighing heavier than that you were still around. Likelihood of you surviving seem to crash. They hope that maybe if they went back to the prison, you would’ve found your way back. That also didn’t happen.
Daryl was in a world of anger and pain. Rick didn’t know how much he cared for you, but he did now. It was becoming dusk again as everybody stood in the courtyard. Another search party would be happening in the morning. Many stopping Daryl from doing anything in the dark. Their main point being that maybe he wouldn’t find something if it wasn’t in the daylight. He sulked in his cell. That's how Carol found him. Deep in thought but she spoke to him either way, “Daryl?” He slowly turned his attention to her. She swallowed her nerves and began again, “I’m so sorry… Her death is on me.” He felt anger rising in him. He knew Carol was remorseful but suggesting that you were already dead? That made him grit his teeth, “Not yer fault, shit happens and you didn’t mean to.” She felt relief until his voice grumbled in displeasure, “An she ain’t dead yet so watch it.” His eyes stare daggers into her, causing her to leave in shame.
He rested his eyes knowing he would sleep a few hour and then go back to the watch tower. Leaning into the side you normally took, he relished in the slightest smell of you in the sheets. He had doubts about having a relationship. Due to past experience and a lack of trust he held with people. When he started to care for you he found he was scared to, not wanting to lose you one day. But he couldn’t deny you after a while. You were to tempting and god did you not give him everything he ever wanted in a partner. He tried to stop his racing thoughts due to not wanting to work himself up.
He tried sleeping, more like sat there with his eyes closed but he got a few minutes in between just laying there. Eventually becoming too restless and going to the watch tower. He knew he should try sleeping more. He would need the energy for the next search but, he couldn’t bring himself to rest with you not beside him.
Your POV
You were driving at a moderate pace, not wanting a walker to step in the road and crash into it. However halfway back you felt it staling. When you saw the gas tank was running on empty you knew you would have to walk eventually. But privy to the luck you had with the medication it soon ran out. You saw a bunch of silhouettes farther into the road. Coming straight at you probably due to your headlights. Then the speed you had been maintaining stopped. You pulled the car over to the side as it sputtered to a stop. Locking the doors and turning the car off. Hopefully the herd you saw wasn’t to big and you could wait for it to pass. You moved to try and crawl into the back crashing to the floor.
You sat there trying to remain calm and quiet when the sound of hundreds of feet shuffled pass you. Some ran into the car making you jump. This horde was a big one but at least now it wasn’t on route to the prison. It felt like ages cramped down between the seats. Your stomach growling at you. What you would do to chug some water. You spaced out looking to the window seeing the occasional shadow pass by outside. Thoughts running through your mind. It suddenly felt like many you had slept a few more hours then you thought. You think it was maybe 3 but then you remembered Benadryl made you fall asleep for at least 12. So the question is, ‘Was I asleep a whole day?’
When the shuffling an smell of rotten meat had stopped. The silence is what brought you from thought. You would wait some more not wanting to run into strays or have the horde turn around because it heard you. You at least sat up in the back. Looking forward you could see a few slower walkers making their way with the crowd. Waiting and watching them until they were a fair distance you got out. Softly closing the door you walked the opposite to them back to the prison. You had wished the car had a working clock in it to tell you if it was close to dawn. But a hour into walking the sky changed the ever so slight difference of blue.
You were hungry and thirsty so the longer you walked the more exhausted you felt. You stepped into the trees close to the road. Electing to sit down and take a break. You watch the sunrise. The cold breeze seeming to warm a little. Maybe you should have found a coat before leaving that house. Granted you thought you’d be in the car. Staring out to the orange sky. Some emotions washed over you. Having a moment to stop and think finally put you back into having to think of what almost happened. This sunrise you sat watching you almost missed. Not only that but you thought about Daryl a little more. Your relationship was slow, almost like you both were afraid to miss step. You couldn’t care about any of that now. You sniffled standing back up. Deciding then and there.
You were going to just love him without restriction.
With such determination, you walked again. Only about 8 more miles left until you get there. The bottom of your feet hurt. You had a pinch in your side. It reminds you of all that ground you used to cover after the farm. Mostly it was driving but there were cases where it was back to walking. Like hunting with Daryl or finding gasoline. Stumbling along the sky was now just blue. Morning birds chirping in trees. You had only walked 3 out of the 8 miles so far. Taking notice that the herd must have cleared a good portion of the walkers because you had yet to see one. You sat down right on the road again. What you would do for some pasta right now. Thought of food making your stomach rumble. Sighing and getting back up again you walked a little slower than you first started. You had to keep going.
You look down to your feet as you walk. A hand pressing into the ache of your side. A distance rumble that wasn’t your stomach caught your ear. The closer it came you realize it was someone using the road! You spotted a car in the distance. The green jeep Glenn and Maggie often used. Sighing in relief, the thought of not having to walk another step was a blessing. You put your hands on your hips stopping in place waiting for them to get closer. But what caught your eye was Daryl’s bike behind them. A smile plastered on your face. You started laughing, it was a way to release some of the emotion bubbled into you. You give a small wave to the now closer jeep. You knew the moment they spotted you because the car seemed to jerk in surprise. The car rolled to a stop next to you. Daryl seemingly lost in thought only slowing seeing the jeep stopped.
By the time you saw him look up and lock eyes he didn’t even let his bike stop fully before jumping off and running to you. You were tired and disheveled looking but oddly so did Daryl. When he reached you he crashed into you lifting you off your feet into an embrace. The cold you had unknowingly gotten used to was replaced by Daryl’s warmth. He was breathing at a fast pace while you melted into him. Tears of relief were in your eyes about to fall when Daryl pulled back and kissed you with desperation. Never before have you been kissed in such a way. With so much… love. This was new to you both loving another like this. So you returned the kiss with just as much heart. Pulling back for air you both huffed staring at each other. The look in his eyes shock you. Never seeing him on the verge of tears made you actually break into your own. Sobbing and clinging to him in desperation with words flooded out of your mouth, “I love *hiccup* you- so much!” Your exhausted state delaying the flood of emotions. You were on survival mode and it wasn’t until feeling safe again that everything hit you.
You felt another hand on your back looking over Daryl’s shoulder to see Maggie with tears of her own with a smiling Glenn behind her. The shock and fear replaced by a laugh that unconditionally rolled out of you. Daryl had his head shoved into your neck, you could feel the dampness of his tears on your skin. You both still keeping a tight hold on the other. Glenn was the one to state in disbelief what mostly all of them had thought, “How the hell you manage to be alive right now is beyond me!” It is what made Daryl pull back to check you for injury’s. You watch as his face scans you. You pulled a hand away to grab the bottle and EpiPen you found with a smile. Looking down to the more then half gone bottle you gave a sheepish smile, “Luck or a refusal of death, I’m not to sure.”
A loud growl in your stomach pushed Daryl into gear, “We gotta get her back.” It’s the first words you’ve heard him say. He was obviously still in protector mode and will fall out of it when he knows you’re ok for real. But you couldn’t disagree with going back home, “How long have I been gone?” You were leaning into Daryl’s side, his arm around you while walking to his bike that had fallen over in his rush to see you. He looked down to you sadly moving away with a grunt to lift his bike up, “Almost two days…” He moved sitting on his bike and holding out his hand to help you on. Your eyes were wide with shock moving closer to him, “Well shit. So much for thinking it was about 12 hours.” You lifted yourself up behind him on the bike. You noticed he was confused at your words but that gave him even more reason to get you back and checked by Hershel.
You dozed off on the ride back. Clinging to Daryl you just couldn’t stop your eyes from wanting to close. You were unaware of how truly malnourished and dehydrated you were. Daryl’s hand would slide back and grab your thigh leading you to perk up from being slumped over him. When the prison came into view you sighed in relief leaning your head in between his shoulder blades. It was Carl who pulled open the gate. When Daryl pulled in you could hear Carl screaming your name as he rushed your way. Using Daryl’s shoulders to get off you waited for Carl to crash into you. He hadn’t show this much emotion since his mom died. You hugged him but eventually pulled back, knocking his hat back in place on his head.
A hand to your back was Daryl’s way of trying to pull you inside. Carl saying he needed to stay at the gate for the others. You didn’t realize everyone was out looking for you. Getting out of the bright light of outside made you realize just how bad of a headache you had, a sign of dehydration. First person you see is Herschel reading his Bible. His face immediately filling with a smile at the sight of you, you sheepishly returning it. His fusing over you getting the attention of Beth with Judith in arm to come rushing out of the cell block. More people fusing over you was becoming overwhelming. Your body seemingly running on whatever fumes it has left.
A bowl seemingly appearing in front of you snapping you back from space. You didn’t even realize you spaced out and you started catching up with Hershel speaking, “Yes, but after she eats she should sleep. She needs to eat again in 6 hours. With as many times we’ve struggled with food I’m worried for her internal organs.” You already started eating what was in front of you. It was filled with more meat than you’ve had since the farm! It was definitely hitting a spot but you struggled with eating it all. Apparently them looking for you always got them checking places that still hadn’t been picked through. You stood up and away from the bowl that was still half full. You grabbed the cup of water from the table and turning to Daryl who had a displeased face. You started walking to the cells,
“Come on grumpy I’m going to bed, if I eat anymore I’ll end up throwing it up.”
You could hear him quietly following you. It wasn’t until you rolled onto the bed with a sigh that you looked over at him. You were confused why you hadn’t felt the bed dip but his face had so much to say. The sheet that covered the door was pulled making the room a little darker. He just stood there seeming to not know what to do. “Daryl…” you were pressed up to the wall having your arms open trying to lure him to you. He lay on his side looking at you. He was tired you were sure. Sighing you scoot yourself closer to him. Running a hand up his arms got him to talk, “M’ sorry, just in my head.” He pulled an arm to wrap around your waist. He gulped looking at you with eyes that could stab a dagger through your heart.
His hand moving from your waist to your face and holding it there, “I didn’t know you were my everything.” You can only look at him with wide eyes and mouth slightly open in shock. Looking on to his glassy eyes while they roamed your being. Sleep was calling you yes… but he was basically screaming for you with his eyes. ‘Everything?’ You could only wonder how he felt thinking you were somewhere dead. His fingers move to bring the hair away from your face. Moving your hand to mirror his you looked him dead in the eyes, “I thought I was going to die, the only reason I didn’t was because of you.” His eyebrows furrowed so you continued,
“My last thoughts were of you. I was going to write you a letter and when I empty a school bag near me for something to write on the meds came falling out with it.”
You could feel him take in a big breath to try and steel himself but you inch closer with determination. ”The only reason I tried so hard was to come back to the one thing I had, you.” You give him a quick peck leaning back for him to come hold you closer to him in a tight grip. He mumbled out something while outstretched over you… “I love you so much it burns.” That's all it took to drift you into sleep with a smile.
When it comes to 'picking your poison.' Daryl will always go to choose you.
Feedback welcome and requests open! [Sorry for lack of posts schedule is back to every other day!]
#daryl dixon#daryl fanfiction#daryl dixon x reader#daryl x female reader#daryl x reader#daryl imagines#norman reedus#twd daryl#angst#fluff
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What's the go-to topic for the RO's if you want to get them talking for the next 4 hours straight? In other words, what kind of things are they most interested in/passionate about?
Hmm...
Vethna: Politics in Vygrand, the ethics of blood magic, the history of magic in general... they are very much an academic at heart and like trying to find the balance between a "perfect world" and reality. Plus they've never spoken about these things to someone who takes them seriously, so having a place to do just that would have Vethna blabbering for hours.
Nikke: Weapons, daggers, specifically. He collects them as he finds them which may be grim to other people (considering he usually takes them from the bodies of the people he kills), but hey... it's still a cool collection, okay? He also loves talking about all his adventures and sharing stupid stories about cool places he's visited. Also fighting techniques. He's genuinely super into that. Goes for Jost + Nikke that they both have A LOT to say about the Taipan gang in Vrithka as well. Like a lot a lot. (None of them are good things)
Jost: Jost is a listener, not a talker. But in the rare, rare occasion you have her going on about something, it's usually because she's upset and somehow, you became the one person she trusts enough to vent things to. It's not necessarily upset as in sad, per se, but she's in a place emotionally where needs someone to bounce ideas and thoughts off of. (However, passion-wise, she's super into the arts, so you could probably pull some words out from her re. arts from the Old Worlds, museums, that sort of thing).
Amilia: Amilia does not stop talking. Amilia will go for hours talking about a cute mushroom on the side of the road, no not underestimate her. And you know what? Yes, she's doing it to annoy who she's with, but part of her really is interested in that mushroom you know. On a more serious note, she's really into music and getting to know people. Amilia's one of those people that makes others open up pretty easily, and it's something she genuinely enjoys since she likes learning the "lore" of individuals. (... is that just gossip?)
Sabir: Astrology, the gods of the Old World, the Old World in general, really. Interestingly enough, Sabir does not enjoy talking about politics. Like you can rile him up if you try hard and enough, but he sincerely tries to avoid getting too far into it because it's such a glib subject. That, and he's already talking about politics all day given his position. Sabir isn't a ramble talker though-- he won't just chatter for hours on end about something. He's into the art of conversation, you see. The back-and-forth is what's fun for him, so he'd rather talk about nothing at all and fill the conversation with shallow banter than passionately talk about his map collection.
Syfyn: Just remind her of the time someone vaguely pissed her off one time and you got about an hour of entertainment off that incident alone. (One time a person cut her in line at the mess hall, one time she stubbed her toe because someone moved a box, one time--) Syfyn also likes talking about combat and training, but Nikke's more like "genuine excitement and tips and tricks" and Syfyn's more like "lmfao I kicked your ASS you're a loser" or "did you see how hard I punched that thing lemme remind you"
Freedom: Hmm... this only works if one is super-super close with Freedom, but they'll be very genuine and skip the word-games when it comes to talking about the Old World, the time when the other gods were alive, their past and people they've met/known. That's the one thing Freedom could speak about for hours and be upfront about AND be genuinely invested in the conversation. They enjoy sharing relics of history with people who are actually willing to listen, and the fact anyone might want to really know about them on an individual level would be very flattering.
#answered#vethna#nikke#amilia#jost#syfyn#sabir#freedom#rip Syfyn she's a blurbo at heart forced to be in her sad girl era#Syfyn + Nikke and Amilia + Freedom would be great convo pairs according to this#I've tried to post this like seven times and Tumblr immediately smote me with a bolt of lightning
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dear dead boy detective (especially paynland) enjoyers: have you yet heard of the biggest gift bestowed upon the fandom so far, aka jayden's charles playlist? the one he mentioned in interviews? well, he dropped it on twitter at 19th of may. and man, do i have stuff to say about it.
there's a lot of 80's bangers, for sure, great to get into the mood and character, but some of the choices...
i'm gonna focus on a few of my favourites, songs that made me go insane when i saw them.
honorable mentions:
- category 1 (so devoted the lines blur): ain't no mountain high enough by marvin gaye and tammi terrell, there is a light that never goes out by the smiths, inkpot gods by the amazing devil
- category 2 (family life): family line and summer child by conan gray, seventeen going under by sam fender, matilda by harry styles, father by the front bottoms
- category 3 (being queer in the 80s): smalltown boy by bronski beat, boys don't cry by the cure
- category 4 (there's no heterosexual explanation for this one): good luck, babe! by chappel roan, yellow by coldplay, fight or flight by conan gray (is this about monty? the cat king? i need answers!), the prophecy by taylor swift, arms tonite by mother mother, sweet by cigarettes after sex, head over heels by tears for fears
this list is by no means complete or comprehensive!
and now, the songs that made me go the craziest:
(they're predominantly in charles' pov as it's his playlist)
found heaven by conan gray
the only reason this song made it into the list and not the honorable mentions instead of smalltown boy is that it makes almost the same point, just so much more explicitly. i don't think i have to say much about it, it's a story of a young person griping with their queerness, being forced to leave home, a common theme of the playlist. "you're in love, you found heaven" when he chose edwin over his own afterlife, heavily implied to be heaven, and built his heaven with him on the mortal plane? ouch! (and we see this same notion repeated in another bop from the playlist, heaven is a place on earth by belinda carlisle).
2. like real people do by hozier
"i miss kissing" charles rowland, 202X
romantic meaning aside, the verses show a sort of a common understanding the boys have around the manner of their deaths and their lives before it. we already know from the show they don't really talk about it, with edwin not knowing about the severity of the abuse charles suffered. it feels like one of them saying "let the past be past, we're together now, yeah?". but also, jayden: can there ever be a platonic explanation for this? ghosts can't touch, can't feel, so they wish they could just kiss like "real" (alive?) people do?
3. flaws by bastille
not the most romantic song, but i absolutely love how well it fits their dynamic. despite his edwardian brand of repression, edwin truly is the one that's more open about his feelings (recognising of course that in this case, the bar is so low it's in hell. haha, get it). edwin has worn his flaws upon his sleeve, and charles has held them buried - eg. bottling up all of his anger and resentment towards his family and his own death. the song presents a very sweet outlook, in which their flaws are brought up to the surface (for example, charles' outburst against the night nurse in episode 4), but they learn to accept them as they are, an extension of themselves.
4. a pearl by mitski
you know it's gonna get intense if there's a mitski song in the mix.
the song is about a person who finds love in their partner, someone who treats them way better than they've ever been treated - and yet they cannot bring themselves to reciprocate the affection ("it's not that i don't want you, sorry i can't take your touch") despite reciprocating the feelings themselves because of the trauma. charles is known to bottle things up ("you're growing tired of me and all the things i don't talk about"). the person in the song recognises the love the other person holds for them ("you love me so hard and i still can't sleep"), which reminds me of charles' response to edwin's confession. not a "no", but a "maybe, as time passes".
5. fair by the amazing devil
this one made me genuinely gasp when i first delved into the lyrics. it's simply so sweet, such a genuine and domestic portrayal of love. at first i thought it was way too open about being a love song (normal text instead of the subtext i'd be used to) for jayden to choose it with edwin in mind, but... there's no one else it can really be about. it's far too domestic, too "established" to refer to crystal. refers to a relationship that's laster for a longer while.
the narrator in the first verse is a person deeply in love with the other person, someone who loves to make his lover laugh and simply drinks in their presence. the "he" in the song i believe is charles, while the "she" refers to edwin. edwin promises to fight off anyone - or any feelings pulling charles down (we can see this in the first episode: "you ever think... what if death did catch us? she'd force us to go to the afterlife and split up" "i will make sure this never happens."). charles feels left behind by the world (seeing as he clings to crystal at first, refering to her as "someone their age who's still alive") and believes edwin to be so much stronger than he's ever been. i'm not going to break down the song verse by verse, but if you read it yourself while subbing out "he" for charles and "she" for edwin you'll see just how sweet (and... strangely very in character?) the song is.
6. work song by hozier
if the previous song made me gasp when i saw the lyrics, this one made me go "NO WAY" out loud when i saw the title. the first one verse is just pure toothrotting sweetness, but the chorus is what i want to draw attention to:
when my time comes around
lay me gently in the cold, dark earth
no grave can hold my body down
i'll crawl home to her
HELLO? charles, who keeps escaping death and afterlife to be able to stay with edwin? charles, as he literally takes his last breath with edwin right there, choosing to be by his side rather than move on? charles, who keeps choosing him despite night nurse's promises and threats? charles, who literally crawled through hell for him?
verse 2, to me, can be interpreted as referring to when charles died. edwin found him at his worst, and he "woke" up with his presence comforting him. he was shivering due to hypothermia and his injuries. edwin didn't ask him about what happened or pushed him, he simply listened. the lines "i didn't care much how long i lived, but I swear, i thought i dreamed her" are pretty self explanatory.
in verse 3 we still see the same attitude of "damn the afterlife, at least we have each other" as charles portrays througout the series. they're free, and heaven and hell are simply words to him.
7. orpheus by vincent lima
i literally have no words for this one. it fits too well. if you want commentary for this one, just... i don't know, rewatch the staircase scene.
8. francesca by hozier
(cracks knuckles) this is the big one. the album francesca is from, unreal unearth, is based on dante alighieri's divine comedy, a fourteenth century poem about a man venturing into hell, purgatory and eventually heaven. the eponymous francesca is one francesca di rimini, a woman who was politically married off to a man older than her, called giovanni malatesta. francesca didn't love him, and eventually fell deep in love with giovanni's younger brother, paolo. the two carried on with the affair for years, before being murdered by giovanni upon his finding out. francesca and paolo are mentioned in canto v of the first book, inferno, as two souls damned in the second circle of hell, lust. their punishment is to be permanently locked in a hurricane, swept away by the winds the moment they manage to get close enough to touch one another.
as opposed to their portrayal in the poem, the song is from the perspective of paolo, explaining that no matter the punishment, he wouldn't change anything about his life because he got to know, and love, francesca.
the first verse brings to mind the scenes in hell, especially on the staircase ("do you think I'd give up? that this might've shook the love from me? or that I was on the brink? how could you think, darlin', i'd scare so easily?" as an echo of charles' "sorry. no version of this where i didn't come get you"). "my life was a storm since i was born, how could i fear any hurricane?" could relate to charles' tumultuous family life, an assurance that nothing he has to deal with while by edwin's side will faze him given the things he's lived through. no, despite everything he's suffered through, charles wouldn't do anything differently - because his (admittedly shitty) life led him to edwin ("i'd tell them, put me back in"). we already know charles would choose him over heaven, willingly sacrificing his own afterlife to stay with a boy he's known for hours, someone kind enough to keep him company as he drew his final breath. all of it - his father's abuse, his schoolmates' bigotry, the pain of his own death, as well as everything he's gone through since - he'd do it all again, for edwin.
"for all that was said of where we'd end up at the end of it" could be taken as an allusion to the fate the boys would meet at "at the end of it", when they're finally caught by death and separated, or as more of a general "if you sin, you will go to hell when you die" (up to you to decide what the sin itself would be - an interpretation that would work with other songs on the playlist is that one such sin would be same sex attraction). then their hearts ceased, they never knew "peace", nor did they want to find it in death. their deaths were too soon, them being ripped away from life, but even though it would break his heart: charles would ask to do it all again.
the outro, i think, beautifully pulls it all together: heaven is not fit to house a love like theirs.
to wrap it all up:
jayden, what were you cooking in there? what do you know??
#please interact w me please please please i need dbd moots <3#dbda#dead boy detectives#dead boy detective agency#paynland#payneland#painland#paineland#chedwin#charles rowland#edwin paine#edwin payne#dead boy detectives agency#dead boy detectives analysis#aough jayden your mind#my art#<- my umbrella trashcan tag
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Pervy Neighbor Jisung Pt.2 ✨
Content/tags/warnings: smut / jisungxfem reader / perv!jisung / reader is a little bit of a perv too / masturbation(m,f) / “noona” / mentions of other members / drug use / panty stealing / cum eating / switch!jisung / switch!reader / mutual pining
Word Count: 4.2k
a/n: Since a lot of people seemed to enjoy my first one-shot, I decided to continue the story in multiple parts! Constructive criticism as well as requests are welcome! Next part will include the house-warming party 👀
Not proofread, all characters are only used for the purpose of face-claims and do not reflect real-life actions and behaviors of people involved
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It’s been almost a month since you moved in, and Jisung has, quite frankly, run out of material. As much as he adored that picture he snapped through your window of your delectable ass presenting itself to him, there were only so many scenarios he could logistically work with- his favorite being one of the first he conjured up, with you inviting him over during a yoga session on your balcony. He was especially fond of that one.
In fact, he had already run through them all several times, and as a man with a creative inclination, he needed new imaginary canvases to paint even more indecent imagery with. He really didn’t know how he ended up in this situation. Sure, he was always a man who thought more with the head between his legs than the one atop his shoulders, but he was never one to actively display such depraved behavior- that was, until you invaded his mind. You were akin to a captivating siren luring him out to the vast depths of the sea that was his lust for you, and he wasn’t quite sure that he wanted to resist your entrancing melody.
There were a few minor complications preventing him from reaching his goals, though. The first being how the hell he would successfully obtain fresh aids for his newfound private pastime. In order to give himself more inspiration to work with, he needed to get closer to you. Normally, he would not see this as an issue at all, as he was rather confident in his physical appearance and charisma. The second- and most debilitating issue, however, lies in your surely abhorrent first impression of him. A visceral chill creeps up his spine at the mere thought of what your current opinion of him must be.
After he fucked his frustrations into his fist every night to thoughts of you, he stared at his ceiling making mental diagrams of different approaches he could take for you to nudge him over to your good side. He may have doomed himself from the first day with his thoughtless and downright rude behavior, but he was determined to rectify the misunderstanding he had perpetuated.
Luckily for Jisung, his ever-reliable mate, Felix, had already taken the first steps for him- by adding you on various social media outlets. He had been mindlessly scrolling when you stood out in the crowd of faces in his suggested friends page. It may not seem like much, but the best possible starting point had practically fallen right into his lap. He now had access to your name, interests, dislikes, music taste, and friends list- conveniently right at his fingertips to educate himself with whenever he desired. Not to mention, one mouth-watering, jaw-dropping, boner-popping display of your gorgeously-proportioned body, clad in a slutty little powder blue string bikini- just for him. It was certainly claiming it’s spot at the top the spank bank for later. He’ll have to send Felix something as a token of his appreciation for that one.
Through his frequent investigations of your treasure trove of publicly accessible information, he learned that you are, in fact, one year older than him- that was going to do wonders for his little “noona” kink. His suspicions of you being an artist were correct, much to his delight, as he’s naturally attracted to creative minds. Your taste in music also aligns surprisingly well with his own. You have more tattoos than he originally thought- which he finds incredibly hot. In your bikini pic, he spotted a dazzling silver gem nestled above your belly button- also sexy. It made him wonder if you have more piercings in places hidden under the skimpy garment- he really hoped you did. One crucial piece of information he couldn’t deduce from his research, though, was your relationship status. If you were in a relationship, it couldn’t be a happy one. There was no indication of you having a partner on any of your platforms, so he decided it was unlikely.
Now that he learned as much as he possibly could about you without direct contact, he needed to find a way to repair your skewed perception of him. He could go with his original plan of just knocking on your door, introducing himself, and apologizing, but that seemed a tad bit more risky than he was comfortable with. Since you were apparently acquainted with Felix, maybe he could convince him to act as his wingman? No, he didn’t want to come across as desperate- even if he absolutely was. Maybe Miroh? The two of you were already friends on the game thanks to him assisting you with your S-Class Dungeon victory. He could help you through the slightly more daunting Levanter or Circus stages next. And then what? Just send “hey, by the way, I’m your new neighbor.”? You would wonder how he knew who you were, and instantly be creeped out- rightfully so. He’ll still help you through more dungeons anonymously though. The intense adrenaline rush he gets from it, along with the blood that rushes straight to his junk when you cutely beg him for help- is addictive.
Your bikini pic sufficed to tide Jisung over for another week and a half, shamelessly painting your image on his phone screen white at least once, sometimes twice, or even three times a day. During this time, he strolled the market he had discovered you frequented and gained some helpful intel- you were a bit closer to Felix than he originally thought, even stopping by the various stands he often helped out with to chat or drop off food for him. A few times, Jisung thought about coming up to him while you were there to introduce himself. Ultimately, he decided it would be best for you to naturally stumble upon them hanging out together. So, he cleverly plotted to join his friend with his market volunteering for the next month or so. The first week was a bust, since you seemed to be avoiding Felix with him in the picture now. Regardless, he didn’t let it discourage him, and attentively remained loyal to his plan.
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When you told Felix about how you didn’t host a house-warming party, as you didn’t really know anyone in the area yet, he offered to throw you one to introduce you to his friends. As he got to know you better, he knew you would fit right in with his friend group. When you agreed, he gave you descriptions of his seven closest friends. You were already briefly introduced to Minho, Changbin, Hyunjin, and Seungmin, but he threw in a few more names you didn’t recognize. Among the unrecognizable names, you tried to pick out the one that could belong to your neighbor, the boy you had spotted curled up on the couch in Minho’s study. Based on his descriptions, it couldn’t have been Jeongin- the youngest of the group, or Jisung- the affectionately-dubbed “babygirl” in Felix’s words. That left you with Chris, his fellow Australian mate, and the eldest. However, his description didn’t match your neighbor either.
When you set out for the market a few days later to deliver Felix some extra sugar cookies you had baked that morning, you saw him again. He was engaged in a conversation with your friend as they appeared to be working one of the fresh fruits and vegetable stalls together. You weren’t close enough to make out what was being discussed between the two, but your attention was drawn to the brunette’s body language. You observed the two friends for a few minutes, as your neighbor cycled through a series of cutesy expressions, excited little jumps, and exaggerated hand movements directed toward Felix. You were dumbfounded by how he candidly resembled a completely different person to the one you had briefly encountered over a month ago. This guy seemed to have an energetic and charismatic personality- an immensely stark contrast to the insolent and crude introduction you were given. You decided to return home with the cookies still in hand, not quite ready to approach yet.
Later that night, you were still hung up on thoughts about your neighbor. You originally thought he really was just an asshole, but the glimpse of him you saw at Minho’s place, as well as the market, had you reconsidering. You wanted to find out more about him. If he did behave differently to you specifically, why was he so callous? You were sure his outburst was the first time you saw him, so it’s not like you did anything to personally upset him. Frustrated, you navigated towards Felix’s social media in the hopes of finding his profile to learn more about him.
To say the man had a lot of followers would be an understatement. He was clearly very popular, and you began to lose hope of finding your neighbor amongst them. You couldn’t spot him in any of the group selfies on Felix’s page either. An imaginary lightbulb illuminated itself in your head as you realized you could just text Felix, asking him to send you all of his friend’s profiles. It wouldn’t be weird, since you’d be meeting them all soon at your house-warming party anyway. While waiting for him to reply, you opened the jar perched on your nightstand, containing a handful of special gummies, popped one in your mouth, and walked to the nearby convenience store to replenish your snack supply.
On your way back home, your phone lit up with the notification of Felix’s reply as you started to feel the effects of the gummy take hold. Immediately after closing your door and kicking your shoes off, you reclined yourself on the sofa, your bag of snacks within arm’s reach, and opened your chat with Felix. Sure enough, he sent you links to seven profiles with each of their names attached. Chris was first, with his feed mostly consisting of himself on late-night walks around town, pictures of his dog, and gym selfies. You immediately noticed how fit he was, with a killer face to match, and began to wonder if all of Felix’s friends were as absurdly attractive as he was. The next profile, Minho’s, caught you off guard to say the least. There were barely any pictures of him, and the ones that were posted usually distorted his face with the most outlandish filters you could imagine. The rest of his feed was overflowing with pictures of his three adorable cats, as well as several unappetizing close-ups of what appeared to be food. You were definitely intrigued, and were looking forward to getting to know him better. The next link directed you to Changbin’s page. While you did briefly meet him in person already, you were too overwhelmed by the utter chaos unfolding in Minho’s apartment to really take in his physique. He was a total gym rat- his feed plastered with pictures showcasing his enormous muscles to prove it. What really surprised you, though, was the sheer amount of dance covers he posted featuring popular k-pop girl group songs. The man knew how to shake it, and you were pleasantly surprised by the way he didn’t lock himself into his masculine side, despite his appearance. Moving on to Hyunjin, you probably spent around an hour admiring the captivating artwork he posted. As an artist yourself, you were enamored by his abstract and romantic style. Equally as captivating, were his features. He was a fashion model, and clearly had the looks for it. You couldn’t spot a single flaw on his perfectly sculpted face.
When you returned to Felix’s links and opened the next one- Jisung’s, you immediately recognized the doe-eyed brunette in the profile picture as your neighbor. Felix had described him to you as the mood-maker of the group, with his hilarious personality and exaggeratedly cute behavior impossible to resist. You had thought Jisung was one of the least likely to be the person in question, so this discovery was very jarring. Even more so, however, was the duality he displayed with his selfies. The most recent upload featuring a cute pose- big, round eyes, puffy cheeks, and pouty lips. As you scrolled down to the next, you were met with a completely different vibe. His head was tilted back, as if he was looking down at you, with sultry siren eyes, his chain necklace dangling from perfect teeth, and the neckline of a loose-fitting white t-shirt exposing his gorgeously-tanned neck and collarbones. You scrolled back and forth between the two pictures, in absolute awe at the fact that they both displayed the same person.
As you continued scrolling, his occupation as a music producer and songwriter was revealed. He uploaded several aesthetic pictures with his own work serving as background music, and you had to admit- he definitely had talent. Each instrumental perfectly encapsulated the vibe of the picture it was paired with, and he definitely knew what he was doing from a production standpoint. The real shock came when you stumbled upon his singing and rapping videos, though. He really could do it all. He perfectly rode every beat with his flow, topping it off with impeccable enunciation. The most impressive (and admittedly attractive) aspect was his ability to effortlessly switch the tone of his voice, going from an insanely high register to a low, raspy one instantaneously. This skill clearly also carried over to his singing- his higher vocals incredibly stable, and his raspy, low tone shamefully had you feeling some type of way. You decided to blame that on the effects of the gummy.
You lingered on Jisung’s profile for longer than you would have liked to admit, especially the pictures displaying his surprisingly flirty and cocky persona. There was one picture in particular, that had your imagination running wild. His eyes were shrouded in black eyeliner, looking straight into the camera, with his lips slightly parted and his tongue protruding toward the corner of his mouth. His thumb nestled just below his bottom lip- complete with black nail polish. It gave off the vibe of him looking up at you from between your thighs, after mercilessly coaxing multiple orgasms out of you with his seemingly skilled tongue, and lazily wiping the remnants of your release off his chin.
To be honest, you’ve been attempting to ignore the persistent throbbing in your core since you first started exploring his feed, but that last picture completely abolished all resolve you were desperately clinging to. Your right hand had been absentmindedly tracing light circles up and down your thigh for the last ten minutes, slowly drawing increasingly closer to your aching heat. Your own hand became Jisung’s in your imagination when you scrolled to a photo of his, wrapped around the neck of an electric guitar. The caption read “Guitar isn’t the only thing my hands are skilled with, ladies… ;)” The little shit knew exactly what he was doing, which, was oddly attractive to you. Your hand slipped under the waistband of your shorts. With your middle finger nestled between your folds, you gasped at the contact.
Your heightened senses due to the gummy amplified the intensity of every touch, the pleasure increasing tenfold. To say you were soaked would be an understatement. The back of your hand was immediately coated with your arousal, as it sandwiched itself between your needy cunt and completely drenched panties. The lewd sounds caused by your wetness, along with the humiliation that washed over you as you realized you were still on the couch in your living room, only served to turn you on even more. As your middle finger breached your entrance, soon followed by your ring finger, you pictured Jisung’s pretty fingers slowly pumping you instead. Black fingernails becoming a clouded shade as your juices coat them, dripping over his silver rings. You wondered if you would be able to feel them as his fingers pushed in and out, or when they bumped up against your swollen clit as he curled his fingers upwards, relentlessly pounding your sweet spot. When you added his tongue into the picture- sloppily lapping anywhere his hand didn’t obstruct, occasionally dragging along your inner thighs and hungrily licking your arousal that had reached there, you let go. You couldn’t control the spasming of your legs, as well as the obscenely load moan that escaped past your lips, as you lost yourself in the most intense orgasm you have felt in ages. After a few minutes of regaining your composure, you washed up and crawled into bed. You were looking forward to getting to know Jisung better.
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The next week Jisung helped Felix at the market, you finally made your appearance. He had his back turned to the bustling foot traffic, tediously deboning a massive chunk of raw tuna when his ears (and dick) involuntarily perked up at the sound of your sweet voice. “Hey Felix! How’s it going today?” You cheerfully approached, prompting the brunette to wonder how his name would sound as it rolled off your lips. “Hey yourself! Its a little slow today, but should pick up around lunch. This is my friend Jisung I was telling you about!” The blond returned, gesturing towards him. Felix told you about him? He wondered what you had heard, and how it made you feel, but quickly shook his thoughts away before he could get lost in them. This was finally his chance to reintroduce himself, and he was not gonna fuck it up this time. He swiped his hands across the front of his apron as he turned towards you, offering what he hoped was a charming smile.
“I would give you a handshake, but I’m pretty sure you don’t want fish smell on your hands. Sorry we kinda got off on the wrong foot there, it’s great to meet you!” He mustered up his best approach as he shot you an apologetic look, nervously cradling the back of his neck with his right hand.
“Oh, no worries! Felix told me you were really nice, so I figured you were just having a bad day. It’s nice to meet you too!” you replied. It took everything in his power to not grab his friend’s stupidly-lovable face and plant a big, fat kiss on his freckle-covered cheek right then and there. The man was, quite literally, doing all of the hard work for him.
After exchanging your greetings, you moved onto the next stall on your list. Meanwhile, Jisung attempted to burn your approximate waist-to-hip ratio into his memory- for a more realistic point of view of him taking you from behind, of course. His mesmerized focus was abruptly interrupted by his friend landing a friendly smack to his ass, signaling for him to get back to work.
Later that night, he was working on a new song when his phone exploded with notifications from his group chat with his friends. Felix had sent a text notifying everyone about a house-warming party he was hosting for a friend. When his eyes swept across your name, he immediately felt himself tighten in his joggers. He had basically pavloved himself into suffering automatic erections at the slightest thought of you with the recent frequency of his jerking off. To say he was ecstatic would be an understatement as he skimmed through the rest of the messages. He was invited to your place. Of course, his friends would be there too, but actually seeing the inside of your living space, as well as being so physically close to you- would add a whole new level of realism to his sinful fantasies. His usual view of you was from the distance of his own apartment, obstructed by two windows when you weren’t on your balcony. Your appearance at the market today was the closest he’s gotten so far.
Maybe if he played his cards right, he could sneak off into your bathroom, find out what shampoo and body wash you used, and purchase the same. Adding the element of your scent to his late-night sessions could be fun. The more he thought about it, the more depravity overtook him. What if he didn’t stop there? What if he snuck into your bedroom? Found a pair of panties to shove in his pocket and later shove into his face as he climaxes, or found your toys you use to get yourself off when you should be using him.
Still seated in front of his computer, he slightly reclined the chair back as he pulled down his waistband and teased his leaking tip slowly, his mind brewing up his latest creation. He was at your party with his friends. You were distracted by replenishing snacks, Changbin and Seungmin were engaged in a heated debate while the others focused on playing a game on your TV. He took advantage of the distractions and made his move, heading towards your bathroom. He passed the door as he embarked on his real mission- to find your bedroom. After one unsuccessful attempt opening the door to reveal a storage closet, he finally found it.
Once he shut the door behind him, he allowed himself a few seconds to take in his surroundings. When his eyes locked onto the door to your closet slightly ajar, he crossed the room and opened it further. Your laundry basket sat on the floor, powder blue lace thong placed neatly on top. He picked up the garment, intending to relocate it to his pocket, but his hand moved faster than his brain, bringing it up to his face instead. Once he inhaled deeply, taking in your scent, there was no hope for him. He shifted to the edge of your bed, uncrumpling your panties and flattening them out neatly on your mattress. He quickly released his greedy cock, laying it on top of your thong as he used the pad of his thumb to apply light pressure. His hips slowly thrusted, grinding his greedy dick between the dainty lace and his calloused thumb, the contrast of textures driving him crazy. As he increased his pace, he wrapped the lace around his whole circumference and replaced the tip of his thumb with his entire hand, amplifying the pressure. The sight of his tan cock peeking through the blue lace, along with the filthiness of his actions, had him biting his bottom lip for dear life to contain his moans threatening to escape.
He did the same in real life. As his thighs started quivering, he threw his head back against the headrest of his seat. His efforts to bite back his noises failed, however, as he couldn’t contain the loud moan that forced its way through his clenched teeth when his hand grazed over a particularly sensitive spot. Feeling his orgasm approaching, he released his grip completely, twitching at the sudden loss of contact. He wasn’t going to cum yet, not when the highlight of his fantasy had yet to play out. He collected himself for a moment before engrossing himself in his scene again.
He began to panic as his hips started twitching. Soft, needy moans and incoherent mumbling rolling off of his drool-covered lips. He needed to cum, but had nothing to release into. He was so lost in his pleasure that he couldn’t stop as the sound of your door creaking open penetrated through his panting and the wet sounds of his spit and precum-coated cock. He locked eyes with your shocked expression as he blew his hot load all over your panties and bed.
“N-Noona.. I-“ you cut him off with a strong slap to his left cheek. His weak legs not able to support him as his knees buckled collapsed to the floor, the side of his face landing dangerously close to the wet spot he had created on your bed. You stood behind him, forcefully grabbing him by his hair and shoving his face directly into the mess.
“I don’t want to hear another word from you. If you’re going to be a filthy pervert, the least you can do is clean up after yourself.” You spat, further rubbing his face into his own cum. He stuck his tongue out, catching his release on it as your grip on his hair controlled him. When you heard his muffled moans you kneeled down, your face now level with his when you tugged his head upwards. “Are you seriously getting off on this you sick fuck?” You pushed him with his back now flush against the side of your bed. “Oh my god, you’re fucking hard again!” Another slap to his cheek, this time the left. You both looked down as the pain from your slap caused his length to jerk violently, a pathetic bead of precum seeping from the tip and rolling down his shaft. You caught it with your finger, bringing your digit to his mouth and shoving it in. He hungrily sucked it off, a deep moan bellowing from his chest. Withdrawing your hand from his mouth and reaching behind his head, you clutched onto the cum-soaked panties, tilted his head upwards, and shoved them in his mouth.
Jisung groaned as he twitched in his hand, shooting his release all over himself and his keyboard, dripping down between the keys. He had been putting off cleaning the damned thing for weeks, and sighed as he slumped further down in the chair. Thanks to you, he wouldn’t be able to procrastinate any longer.
#skz hard hours#skz x reader#skz han#han jisung smut#han jisung#skz smut#skz imagines#han jisung imagines#han x reader#han jisung x reader#non idol au#kpop#kpop smut#stray kids han#stray kids smut#stray kids
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Badeshi: Only three people speak this 'extinct' language
By Zafar Syed, February 2018
Would you like to learn a few words of a language only three people in the world speak?
Badeshi used to be spoken widely in a remote snow-clad valley, deep in the mountains of northern Pakistan.
But it is now considered extinct.
Ethnologue, which lists all of the world's languages, says it has had no known speakers for three or more generations.
But in the Bishigram Valley, we found three old men who can still speak in Badeshi (you can hear them in the video at the link).
"A generation ago, Badeshi was spoken in the entire village", says Rahim Gul. He doesn't know how old he is, but looks over 70.
"But then we brought women from other villages [for marriage] who spoke Torwali language. Their children spoke in their mother tongue, so our language started dying out."
Torwali is the dominant language in the area, which is itself under pressure from Pashto, but has pushed Badeshi to the brink in this valley.
"Now our children and their children speak Torwali," said Said Gul, Rahim Gul's first cousin. "So who should we speak our own language with?"
Said Gul also doesn't know his own age. When he said he was 40, somebody corrected him. "It's more like 80!" Said Gul quickly shot back, "No, may be 50, but not 80!"
There are no job opportunities in the area, so these men have spent a lot of time in touristy Swat District, where they have picked up the Pashto language, and that is mainly how they communicate.
Because of a lack of opportunities to use Badeshi, over the decades even these three men have started forgetting the language.
While they were talking in Badeshi, Rahim Gul and Said Gul regularly forgot a word or two, and could only remember after prodding from the others.
Rahim Gul has a son, who has five children of his own, but all of them speak Torwali.
"My mother was a Torwali speaker, so my parents didn't speak any Badeshi in the house. I didn't get a chance to pick it up in childhood. I know a few words, but don't know the language. All my children speak Torwali.
"I do regret it, but now that I'm 32 there is no chance I can learn Badeshi. I'm very sad at the prospect that this language will die out with my father."
Sagar Zaman is a linguist affiliated with the Forum for Language Initiative, a non-governmental organisation dedicated to the promotion and preservation of endangered languages of Pakistan.
"I travelled to this valley three times, but the inhabitants were reluctant to speak this language in front of me," he says.
"Other linguists and I were able to collect a hundred or so words which suggested that this language belongs to Indo-Aryan sub family of languages."
Zaman Sagar says Torwali and Pashto speakers look down upon Badeshi, so there is a stigma attached to speaking it.
Perhaps it's too late to save Badeshi, but at the very least, you can learn a few words to keep the memory of the language alive:
Meen naao Rahim Gul thi - My name is Rahim Gul
Meen Badeshi jibe aasa - I speak Badeshi
Theen haal khale thi? - How do you do?
May grot khekti - I have eaten
Ishu kaale heem kam ikthi - There is not much snowfall this year
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Sorry if this was asked/addressed before, but do you consider the Twisted Wonderland Novels to be canon compliant, canon divergent, or maybe a little bit of both? Thank you so much!
Hello hello! ^^ Thank you for this question!
The Twst novels are fascinating, and seem to be accomplishing a multitude of things at once: we get insight into things that are barely hinted at in the game, like the scorn Riddle suffers post-overblot, the respect he holds for Leona and how he wants to learn from Malleus.
・Riddle and the consequences of overblot
・Riddle's confession
・Riddle on Malleus
We also get complete changes to things established in the game, such as the retconning of our introductions to Leona, Vil and Azul.
・Meeting Leona
・Meeting Pomefiore (pt1))
・Meeting Azul (pt1)
And, most interesting of all, we get a lot more detail into things that also might be happening in the game, but we were just not told about it due to the limitations of the visual novel medium:
・Yuuya's First Class
The prefect is not exactly welcomed by the students of NRC, with no one but Ace and Deuce willing to acknowledge them.
・Yuuya Fails
After being supported by Ace, the prefect fails to support him in return
・The Classroom
Tensions between Savanaclaw and Diasomnia students
・Riddle and Unique Magics
Information on how unique magics manifest.
・The Overblot Battle
Ruggie and Jack work together to defeat Leona
・Post-Overblot Leona (the flashback monologue)
Leona's fear of giving up.
・Trusting Riddle
Ace and Deuce's relationship to Riddle.
Due to how some things are being completely changed I think it is safer to consider the novels as a different canon unto themselves, but they are also a great frame of reference to apply to the game!
→ What language is being spoken in Twst?
It is never specified in the game, but we know the language at novel-NRC is not Japanese!
→ What is the roommate situation at NRC?
While we have a few hints in the game, the novel has explicitly explained the rooming situations!
→ How many students are there at NRC?
Again we have a few hints here and there in the game, but the novel has given us a solid number :>
While things like the above three points might not apply to the game at all they are a useful reference for fanfic purposes, for example, until such a time that they are confirmed or denied by game canon.
And there might be times when the novels are even making corrections to in-game oversights 👀
In Book 1, for example, Ace is unable to repeat Chenya's full name after hearing it for the first time.
The problem: Ace is well known for being talented at mimicry, imitating tongue-click sounds he learns from Rook on his first try in order to communicate with hedgehogs.
The solution: Both the novel and the manga corrected this scene by having Deuce, not Ace, be the one who struggles to repeat Chenya's name.
Did they realize at some point that Ace not being able to mimic Chenya goes against an important character point, which they then corrected in the other two mediums? 👀
As the novels are coming out after the game, this could mean that there is a possibility that they are actually more accurate to the characters in some ways, as the creators have had a chance to review previously established points and make adjustments accordingly ^^
(The author for the novels, Hioki Jun, is both one of the original writers of the game's events and vignettes along with Yana, and a member of Yana's personal studio, D-6th!)
While maybe not canon to each other, both the novels and the game are most enjoyable, and I highly recommend them both!
English-language translation of the first novel coming out this August! 🥳
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