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realcarreviews · 1 year

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2005 Honda Accord

This was my first car so its my first review.

Mine looked sorta like this one I guess. I dont really remember too well but it was the same sorta gray metallic color. I think the color of my car was called meteorite or some weird closeted-esque thing like that. Like you know just a little fruity but wears khakis and sketchers. These are really about as generic as you can get. This car has “love listening to music” in its tinder bio. Associates of Liberal arts ass car. 3.0 gpa no extracurriculars ass car. “I can only draw stick figures” ass car.

I got mine during my junior year of highschool from my dad. It was a 5 speed manual 4 cylinder making, according to wikipedia, “ 161 hp (120 kW) and 160 lb⋅ft (217 N⋅m)”. Nothing crazy, I remember it used to shake a lot when it got up to like 75-80 mph. That was probably cause I was a kid and didnt maintain it well but who knows. Its for sure one of the cars of all time. For a car, it can drive, reverse, go forward, and if you have a manual, you can shift gears as well.

I probably loved it at the time and I do have a lot of fond memories of it. It was perfect for highschool me, but I never had a whole lot of fun with it. Theres not really much to say about this car honestly. They’re about as mid as you can get for a car. I beat mine up using it for pizza delivery, it broke down on me a few times. Once the clutch broke while I was on the job. Another time it was 1 am and I was driving with my friend. I was taking a left turn when suddenly it slammed into the ground. My front right axle broke mid turn and sent my front wheel grinding into the street. I remember when I got out to see what happened I heard an evil witches laugh somewhere in the distance. I mean a real like witchlaugh.mp3 ass laugh. Fuckin halloween decoration ass laugh. So if you have one of these watch out for witches I guess. It seems to be a very cursable car. Mine eventually died becuase I didn’t put coolant in it and the head gasket blew. So you do need to maintain them which is weird for a Honda.

All this being said this is a fine car. If you need a car and can find one for cheap it’ll work. You wont stand out or win any races but who cares. It’ll get you there. Thats all that really matters. The manual transmissions for these are easy to work. Nice and rubbery, easy operation and fast enough to merge into traffic reliably.

Pros:

-Its a honda, cheap to maintain and repair.

-Its a car.

-Headlights????

-good turning radius actually

Cons:

-Witches will curse this one.

-You have to put coolant in it or it will break (abnormal)

-A girl who I dated one time said it was the best looking car in the senior lot and she was wrong about that. I took her to prom but we only ever kissed. Im more gay now thank god.

#honda #honda accord #car review #Real car reviews #liberal arts #normal ass car

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imwritesometimes · 1 month

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why is every album an artist releases these days 'their best one yet!' like I'm sorry this cannot be possible please reevaluate their discography and see me after class

#I PROMISE YOU this is not just about certain super mega popular pop stars who have released albums recently #however... these albums seem to have been released and are seeing... from what I can gather online... mixed results even from Fans #and my very own fave current day band just released an album of THEIR own earlier this month and the general reviews were 'best one ever!'#I listened to it... it's good. it's fine. it's a little bit of a departure from their usual style and that's fine. but it was by no means #their best album. even their LAST album was better and IT wasn't my fave either....#but I definitely felt like it was better than this new album. I was so 🤷‍♀️with their new album I haven't even put it on the thumb drive #for my car yet which.... says a lot. usually their stuff IMMEDIATELY goes on the car thumb drive. IMMEDIATELY. this one... ehh #I'm not losing out not hearing it in the car rn...#I just feel like there is no real critiquing of music anymore I guess IDK....#but I cannot stress enough this is NOT just about two popular popstars lol I don't even listen to their stuff I just see #things online and I'm like hmmmm.... every artist cannot possibly be releasing their BEST ALBUM YET every time #erin explains it all

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terrible-romance-reviews · 1 year

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I would also like to go off about how terrible the book Touch Of Darkness was like holy shit (spoilers ahead if you care dont read further)

So like we got, our hades x persephone romance right? Now make it modern day. Now make Hades a night club owner?? But also he is still doing, underworld duties the gods are still all gods. Now add, consistent reoccuring flower themes, BUT, nothing is done with them.

Ok we on the same page now? No we arent it gets worse. Persephone? A cunt for no reason. Also licherally being? Gaslit by Demeter? The entire time thats the fucking twist. All the characters are completely 2 dimensional, you are not getting past they like sex and secondary characteristic that is brought up.

Random human best friend, does fucking nothing, enables Persephone being a massive cunt for no reason.

The entire book is held up by how banger the sex scenes are, I am talking IMMACULATE the shit is so steamy like hot DAMN.

Plot sucks Persephone hates Hades for no reason meanwhile Hades is actively out here being Just A Guy and not even?? Being that fucking terrible? He isnt bad honestly, like, at all really. Not only is he not really that bad he ACTIVELY FUCKING LISTENS TO THIS BITCH AND?? BECOMES A BETTER PERSON?? he deserves so much better. I hate persephone in this book and she is the main character and i just found her so unbelievably annoying. Like. Half the 2 dimensional, not at all fleshed out remotely characters were more enjoyable for me to read. I loved Hermes but he also read as flat and likes sex and games and thats it really. I visualized him as a silly little twink though and that probably helped.

This book was just so attrocious it sets up plot that just doesnt even need to be a plot line and conflates it so out of proportion and then NOTHING AND NOTHING THEY DONT DO ANYTHING WITH IT!

10/10 if you are looking for a trashy novel i think it took my slow ass 3 days to finish reading and then i did nothing but complain to everyone that would listen and THEN i bought the rest in whAT IS A FUCKING TRILOGY?? AND THERE ARE BOOKS IN HADES PERSPECTIVE????

Oh oh oh would also like to establish, it didnt occur to me that this was an aggressively smutty romance book when I first bought it, I didnt notice the lack of publication house, I just thought it would be a cute Hades x Persephone book with some tragic conflict. I felt no romantic build up or sexual tension while reading and the first sex scene hit me like a fucking truck I was astonished.

Also the Hades book reads better but I also just?? Liked Hades as a character significantly more and I havent finished it yet but already it felt, like it had better plot construction, and real conflict, instead of this fake ass shit that Persephone was making a huge massive deal out of.

It also deals with some rape-y shit so if that triggers you definitely don't read, that is one of the conflict points but I hated it and felt it was addressed as a way to move plot rather than bring actual light to the issue of it. It let Hades swoop in after his girl got drugged and had like no other repercussions or trauma tied to the experience or anything really.

I have to go back and read it again to get all of my major bullet point issues, I would also like to highlight every time they bring up flowers and then never use it for forshadowing or meaningful symbolism because it happens a lot throughout the book to the point of me, a notoriously dense individual, actually noticing and getting annoyed by it.

All of the annoyance of the book just adds to the charm, but really, only read it if you don't know what an actual good romance book looks like and couldn't get a better suggestion, OR, if you are just a bad book aficionado like myself.

#terrible romance reviews #a touch of darkness #this book is bad and I have so many complaints #i will actually genuinely take my copy and annotate this shit with sticky notes and why i fucking hate it #it is so bad its good #like watching a massive 5 car accident in real time #you just cant stop watching #i have so many issues with this book #books and reading #trashy romance #adult romance

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solanaceae-piperita · 1 year

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I posted 8,251 times in 2022

That's 4,703 more posts than 2021!

190 posts created (2%)

8,061 posts reblogged (98%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@themadcapmathematician

@chubbytifa

@icefang111

@mischiefmanaged687

@polybius1201

I tagged 1,214 of my posts in 2022

#random thoughts - 225 posts

#for writing - 172 posts

#for art - 160 posts

#art reference - 150 posts

#writing reference - 142 posts

#dear future self - 137 posts

#food diary - 136 posts

#journal - 127 posts

#bucket list - 44 posts

#dcmk - 44 posts

Longest Tag: 130 characters

#i get alpaca in a random animal generator of what i'd be reborn as one (1) time and now tumblr keeps giving me posts about alpacas

My Top Posts in 2022:

I turned 5up 's Forgotten Lands SMP house into two giant leaflings :DD

5 notes - Posted March 25, 2022

TikTok - DDOI vid

5 notes - Posted November 15, 2022

do you like her smile? Ligaya likes yours :))

Twitter | Instagram

7 notes - Posted October 9, 2022

miraculous ladybug episodes are fanfics of the previously released episodes (no you can't change my mind)

38 notes - Posted March 22, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

[Image ID: meme template of two people in business suits shaking each other's hands. The text on the first arm says "Miraculous Ladybug" and the text on the second arm says "Detective Conan". The text on the grasping hands says "How the hell is this child driving a car". End ID.]

40 notes - Posted March 22, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #it's always the memes LMAOO #also I am an alpaca Real #I completely forgot about that mlb dcmk meme I made I'm sobbing #but it's so true #although it's both how and why are they driving a car and who let them anywhere near a steering wheel #coming from a person whose only driving experience is in the driveway in a DREAM and even then I crashed the damn car #it wasn't even my car #also I should post more art v-v #random thoughts

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wainswright · 4 months

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I say no because fairytale magic works with threshold type of definition: what defines a house is an owner’s conception of home, the divide between inside and outside, doorways.

A warrant is a sign the police can’t invade a house based off the protections a government tries to provide to the rights of an individual unless there is probable cause. An interesting part is that the places searched must be described “with particularity,” or the search is unlawful. so the government in its definition already does not decide what a home is but under what circumstances it may be lawfully unprotected.

#the real question is can a vampire come into a car without permission #prima facie review leads me to believe a vampire can enter a car or a hotel room or a train sleeping area #because fairytale magic defines home as where you accept as a place to return to. i guess. so a place #you spend time in and think of as home is home. like an rv or boat house.#im joking of course there are many ways the government decides what your place of residence is #but thats not the fairytale definition of home

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mrsonvsyoutube · 1 year

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Real Mechanic Reacts to Terrible Tiktok Car Advice

youtube

#msvy real mechanic stuff #msvy tips and tricks #msvy tips and tricks reviews #msvy reactions #msvy cars #msvy mechanics #msvy car mechanics #Youtube

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chaosandmarigolds · 1 month

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(slowly sets random sting ray plushie I got for my birthday down) Brain-rot. so I present Dad!Simon and Ollie at the aquarium

Simon! Who was currently two weeks deep into babysitting oliver and it being the middle of summer almost everywhere and everything had been exhausted

"Library time with Miss Rue?"

Ollie frowns from his ice cream,- which you would murder simon for if you found out which is why they were both sworn to secrecy, "MIss Rue is jus reeed-ing Peter Bunny again. No want."

"No want." Simon echoed slowly, leaning against the kitchen counter as he tried to think.

"Big mall?" "No..."

"The zipline park?" (A normal park with a little kid zipline)

"No."

"The animals?"

"Nope. Momma said we stinky after animal."

Simon nods again, the local farmer's markets would normally have a little petting zoo- so that had also become a staple. "She did- rightoo laddie. Okay...okay, let Mister Riley think for a minute."

Ollie nods to his babysitters words and takes another hefty bite of the ice cream, "We could....we could see fish? We see fish."

"Fish?"

"We go fish, in-in big pool."

Simon who spent ten finding which aquarium within a fifty mile radius had the best reviews because if he is...might as well make it memorable

Simon who made sure Ollie wore is water proof shoes because...well he just knew the kid was going to jump into the little kiddie water pad the aquarium had

Simon who packed a towel and change of clothes for that exact reason too

Simon who so has baby shark stuck in his head

Simon who once the tickets are purchased is already trying to trick the tyke down, basically playing marco polo

Simon who held up Ollie without a second thought to see the Jelly fish, telling him how he was once stung while he was down in Japan, smiling to the childs laughter

Simon who spends the extra fifteen dollars so Ollie could feed the stingrays, keeping an arm looped around him to keep him stable

Simon who of course notices the looks he's getting from the group of moms, he ignores them though

Simon who tried to politely turn down the one who came up to him, nice woman, seemed kind- yet...she wasn't...you

Simon who had to get more firm and did lie when she wouldn't get the message-

"Listen lady- I could kill ya without even blinking 'n you are really testin my patience so ho' bout you leave me 'n my son alone before i get annoyed?" Just how he assumed it would've gone down the woman became flustered and excused herself, meanwhile, Ollie was still being held in the air to look at the catfish.

Ollie looks to Simon as he then lets out a sigh and adjusts his grip on the boy, "Ister Riley?"

"Yeah, lad?"

"Mommy said killing people isn't nice."

Simon clears this throat, "Mum is real smart like that."

Simon who gets Ollie a plushie and teehsirt

Simon who feels really proud of himself when Ollie is fast asleep for the entire car ride home

(annnnyway thats it<333 any feedback and all that jazz means the world to me!!)

#simon riley imagine #simon riley fanfic #cod x you #simon riley x reader #cod fluff #simon ghost riley #simon ghost x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley x you #coco's chaos <3 #mw2 ghost #ghost mw2 #dad!ghost #dad simon riley #dad!simon riley #xfem!reader #x female reader #x fem!reader #coco’s pre k universe! <3

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reviewgeny · 2 years

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✅ Best GPS Tracker with Longest Battery Life 2022 | Top 5 Buying Guide

Product Description:

Number 1. Tracki Mini GPS Tracker Tracki is one of the most adaptable tracking gadgets available today. It's a little GPS tracker that you can easily transport and attach to anything. It may be used to track vehicles, drones, barbacks, traveling trolleys, and other objects. The best thing is that Tracki's cellular-based tracking technology is global. You'll never lose track of your valuable things with its real-time GPS monitoring and long-lasting battery backup.

Number 2. LandAirSea 54 GPS Tracker The LandAirSea 54 is one of the most affordable trackers we've seen from a reliable manufacturer. This waterproof device has a magnet built in, so you don't need to buy a separate case for it. You can sign up for a long-term prepaid plan for as little as $20 per month.

Number 3. Amcrest GL300W GPS Tracker The Amcrest GL300W GPS tracker is one of the smallest tracker you can have in the market. It weighs less than 4 ounces and can be used to track things in secret. If you can hide it, you can track it. Like most other GPS trackers on the market, the Amcrest GL300W GPS Tracker lets you set speed limits and geofences. You can also tell your loved ones and close friends where you are right now. Pressing the SOS button makes it easy to call for help in an emergency.

Number 4. Optimus 2.0 GPS Tracker Whether you want to monitor teens or elderly parents, keeping a car GPS tracker hidden and protected from tampering or removal is essential. The Optimus 2.0 measures just 3 inches long, which is extraordinarily small. It may be quickly and easily mounted beneath a bumper or in a tire well thanks to the readily available magnetic mount.

Number 5. GeoZilla GPS Tracker –Best For Custom Alerts If you need a basic GPS tracker for personal use, Geozilla is the best solution for you . All of the cutting-edge features are available for a fair price. Trackers detect crashes and then send notifications to emergency contacts, allowing for immediate assistance.

#best gps tracker for car #gps tracker #car gps tracker #mini gps tracker #gps tracker reviews #best car gps tracker #best gps tracker for bike #best gps trackers #gps tracker for bike #gps trackers review #best gps trackers review #gps trackers #best gps trackers for vehicle #pet tracker review #best gps tracker #best gps real-time tracker #ReviewGeny #bike gps tracker

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mostlysignssomeportents · 3 months

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Lies, damned lies, and Uber

I'm on tour with my new, nationally bestselling novel The Bezzle! Catch me TONIGHT in PHOENIX (Changing Hands, Feb 29) then Tucson (Mar 10-11), San Francisco (Mar 13), and more!

Uber lies about everything, especially money. Oh, and labour. Especially labour. And geometry. Especially geometry! But especially especially money. They constantly lie about money.

Uber are virtuosos of mendacity, but in Toronto, the company has attained a heretofore unseen hat-trick: they told a single lie that is dramatically, materially untruthful about money, labour and geometry! It's an achievement for the ages.

Here's how they did it.

For several decades, Toronto has been clobbered by the misrule of a series of far-right, clownish mayors. This was the result of former Ontario Premier Mike Harris's great gerrymander of 1998, when the city of Toronto was amalgamated with its car-dependent suburbs. This set the tone for the next quarter-century, as these outlying regions – utterly dependent on Toronto for core economic activity and massive subsidies to pay the unsustainable utility and infrastructure bills for sprawling neighborhoods of single-family homes – proceeded to gut the city they relied on.

These "conservative" mayors – the philanderer, the crackhead, the sexual predator – turned the city into a corporate playground, swapping public housing and rent controls for out-of-control real-estate speculation and trading out some of the world's best transit for total car-dependency. As part of that decay, the city rolled out the red carpet for Uber, allowing the company to put as many unlicensed taxis as they wanted on the city's streets.

Now, it's hard to overstate the dire traffic situation in Toronto. Years of neglect and underinvestment in both the roads and the transit system have left both in a state of near collapse and it's not uncommon for multiple, consecutive main arteries to shut down without notice for weeks, months, or, in a few cases, years. The proliferation of Ubers on the road – driven by desperate people trying to survive the city's cost-of-living catastrophe – has only exacerbated this problem.

Uber, of course, would dispute this. The company insists – despite all common sense and peer-reviewed research – that adding more cars to the streets alleviates traffic. This is easily disproved: there just isn't any way to swap buses, streetcars, and subways for cars. The road space needed for all those single-occupancy cars pushes everything further apart, which means we need more cars, which means more roads, which means more distance between things, and so on.

It is an undeniable fact that geometry hates cars. But geometry loathes Uber. Because Ubers have all the problems of single-occupancy vehicles, and then they have the separate problem that they just end up circling idly around the city's streets, waiting for a rider. The more Ubers there are on the road, the longer each car ends up waiting for a passenger:

https://www.sfgate.com/technology/article/Uber-Lyft-San-Francisco-pros-cons-ride-hailing-13841277.php

Anything that can't go on forever eventually stops. After years of bumbling-to-sinister municipal rule, Toronto finally reclaimed its political power and voted in a new mayor, Olivia Chow, a progressive of long tenure and great standing (I used to ring doorbells for her when she was campaigning for her city council seat). Mayor Chow announced that she was going to reclaim the city's prerogative to limit the number of Ubers on the road, ending the period of Uber's "self-regulation."

Uber, naturally, lost its shit. The company claims to be more than a (geometrically impossible) provider of convenient transportation for Torontonians, but also a provider of good jobs for working people. And to prove it, the company has promised to pay its drivers "120% of minimum wage." As I write for Ricochet, that's a whopper, even by Uber's standards:

https://ricochet.media/en/4039/uber-is-lying-again-the-company-has-no-intention-of-paying-drivers-a-living-wage

Here's the thing: Uber is only proposing to pay 120% of the minimum wage while drivers have a passenger in the vehicle. And with the number of vehicles Uber wants on the road, most drivers will be earning nothing most of the time. Factor in that unpaid time, as well as expenses for vehicles, and the average Toronto Uber driver stands to make $2.50 per hour (Canadian):

https://ridefair.ca/wp-content/uploads/2024/02/Legislated-Poverty.pdf

Now, Uber's told a lot of lies over the years. Right from the start, the company implicitly lied about what it cost to provide an Uber. For its first 12 years, Uber lost $0.41 on every dollar it brought in, lighting tens of billions in investment capital provided by the Saudi royals on fire in an effort to bankrupt rival transportation firms and disinvestment in municipal transit.

Uber then lied to retail investors about the business-case for buying its stock so that the House of Saud and other early investors could unload their stock. Uber claimed that they were on the verge of producing a self-driving car that would allow them to get rid of drivers, zero out their wage bill, and finally turn a profit. The company spent $2.5b on this, making it the most expensive Big Store in the history of cons:

https://www.theinformation.com/articles/infighting-busywork-missed-warnings-how-uber-wasted-2-5-billion-on-self-driving-cars

After years, Uber produced a "self-driving car" that could travel one half of one American mile before experiencing a potentially lethal collision. Uber quietly paid another company $400m to take this disaster off its hands:

https://www.economist.com/business/2020/12/10/why-is-uber-selling-its-autonomous-vehicle-division

The self-driving car lie was tied up in another lie – that somehow, automation could triumph over geometry. Robocabs, we were told, would travel in formations so tight that they would finally end the Red Queen's Race of more cars – more roads – more distance – more cars. That lie wormed its way into the company's IPO prospectus, which promised retail investors that profitability lay in replacing every journey – by car, cab, bike, bus, tram or train – with an Uber ride:

https://www.reuters.com/article/idUSKCN1RN2SK/

The company has been bleeding out money ever since – though you wouldn't know it by looking at its investor disclosures. Every quarter, Uber trumpets that it has finally become profitable, and every quarter, Hubert Horan dissects its balance sheets to find the accounting trick the company thought of this time. There was one quarter where Uber declared profitability by marking up the value of stock it held in Uber-like companies in other countries.

How did it get this stock? Well, Uber tried to run a business in those countries and it was such a total disaster that they had to flee the country, selling their business to a failing domestic competitor in exchange for stock in its collapsing business. Naturally, there's no market for this stock, which, in Uber-land, means you can assign any value you want to it. So that one quarter, Uber just asserted that the stock had shot up in value and voila, profit!

https://www.nakedcapitalism.com/2022/02/hubert-horan-can-uber-ever-deliver-part-twenty-nine-despite-massive-price-increases-uber-losses-top-31-billion.html

But all of those lies are as nothing to the whopper that Uber is trying to sell to Torontonians by blanketing the city in ads: the lie that by paying drivers $2.50/hour to fill the streets with more single-occupancy cars, they will turn a profit, reduce the city's traffic, and provide good jobs. Uber says it can vanquish geometry, economics and working poverty with the awesome power of narrative.

In other words, it's taking Toronto for a bunch of suckers.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/29/geometry-hates-uber/#toronto-the-gullible

Image: Rob Sinclair (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Night_skyline_of_Toronto_May_2009.jpg

CC BY 2.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0/deed.en

#pluralistic #uber #hubert horan #fraud #toronto #geometry hates cars #urbanism #ontpoli #olivia chow #self-regulation #transport #urban planning #taxis #transit #urban theory #labor #algorithmic wage discrimination #veena dubal

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realcarreviews · 1 year

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1999 Porsche Carrera Coupe

This car can suck my dick and I mean it. What does it have that I dont?

#porsche #porsche carrera #fuck it #cars #car review #fuck you #real car reviews

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incorrectbatfam · 7 months

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Tim and stpeh’s top ten patrol fails

——— (10) ———

Tim and Steph: *chained together*

Two-Face: *monologues*

Tim: *picks the lock*

Steph, whispering: Free me first.

Tim: Why?

Steph: Just do it.

Tim: *frees her*

Steph: *sprints past Two-Face to the bathroom*

——— (9) ———

Steph: I'm closing in on the museum. Where are you?

Tim: ETA one minute.

Steph: Alright, I'm doing a quick perimeter check. Doesn't seem like there's much happening here.

Tim: Where are you? I don't see you. And this entire gallery looks deserted.

Steph: I've never heard anyone call a science museum a gallery.

Tim: Science? I'm at the modern art museum.

Steph: Red?

Tim: Yeah?

Steph: We're both at the wrong place, aren't we?

——— (8) ———

Tim and Steph: *tied to chairs*

Ivy: I gave the city ONE REASONABLE DEMAND and they—

Steph: *scoots her chair*

Ivy: —but all they cared about was—

Steph: *scoots her chair*

Ivy: So now I'm going to make them pay for—what are you doing?

Steph, biting an apple: ...

Tim: She gets snacky.

——— (7) ———

[on a stakeout]

Tim, stifling a yawn: What time is it?

Steph: Half past one. Still nothing on the drop site. If you need some shut eye you can tell me.

Tim: Nah, I'll just use my phone.

Steph: *peers over his shoulder*

Steph: You're reading an adopted by Batman AU?

Tim: ...I was hacked. Just right now.

——— (6) ———

Steph: I could use a little backup.

Tim, shooting his grapple: I'm on my way. How many are there?

Steph: Four, though I bet more are hiding.

Tim: In that case, we better get you out of there instead of wasting time.

Tim: *swings by*

Tim: Grab on.

Steph: *grabs his legs and pulls his pants down*

——— (5) ———

Tim: What should I call my next contingency plan?

Steph: Fuck if I know.

[later]

Barbara: Alright, Tim, let's review your plan for...

Barbara: *squints*

Barbara: Everybody leave. I want to talk to Tim alone.

——— (4) ———

Tim: I'm not so sure about my disguise.

Steph, dressed like the 1980s: It's an 80s-themed roller derby. No way you can mess that up.

Tim: *shows up dressed like the 1880s*

Steph: I stand corrected.

——— (3) ———

Steph: You need to put that computer down. Have a Batburger.

Tim: No. I've almost got it. And don't try to distract me 'cause I've seen everything.

Steph, whispering under her breath: You haven't seen Superboy.

Kon: You called?

Tim: Oh for crying out loud.

——— (2) ———

Tim: *driving the Batmobile*

Steph: Hey, what does this button do?

Tim: NO DON'T THAT—

Steph: *hits the button*

Tim: *gets ejected*

——— (1) ———

Steph: Another successful patrol, if I say so myself.

Tim: All in a night's work.

Bruce: Where's Damian?

Tim: Huh?

Bruce: You were supposed to watch him.

Steph: Pfft, we knew that. He's right... uh...

Tim: We're just gonna—

Tim and Steph: *hop in the car and speed away*

——— (Honorable mention) ———

Steph: No sign of Robin at the dog shelter either. Did you locate his tracker?

Tim: It's offline. Best case scenario he just disabled it, but...

Steph: Oh God, we are in so much trouble.

Tim: Any other ideas?

Steph: Nope. I'm gonna get a drink of water real quick.

Steph: *goes into a store*

Steph: *comes back out with Damian*

Steph: Guess who I found trying to buy a butterfly knife?

Tim: I'll update Batman.

Tim, on the phone: Hey B, guess what?

Damian: *snatches the phone*

Damian: They abandoned me in Crime Alley!

Bruce: Red Robin, Spoiler, you're cleaning the lockers when you get back.

Tim: No wait—

Damian: *hangs up*

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jokest3r · 2 years

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God they really shouldve delayed Saints Row cause man those glitches look horrible. Plus Epic Games Exclusive? Not it. I only hope when they put it up on Steam that most of the bugs get fixed by then

#Saints Row #i had real high hopes for this #really upset rn but in a disappointed way #i dont want to sea shanty yet #the only thing in the reviews i find funny are people saying the physics are broken when it comes to cars exploding in a SAINTS ROW game #let me reiterate #a saints row game

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shijiujun · 4 months

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A Summary: The Spirealm | 致命游戏 (Kaleidoscope of Death 死亡万花筒 Live Action) & Why You Should (Eventually) Watch It

Talk about the most short-lived drama release ever, not even totalling two hours if I recall. Creating this summary as I've seen a handful of confused friends, so here it goes!

It's going to be a long review because I sped through all 78 episodes and only properly watched the first two doors, but I got you. You'll get both the brief book rundown and the drama parts!

If you just wanna see the bromance (LOVE) parts please skip to section 4!!!!

1. Overview

Title: The Spirealm (kinda awful I'm sorry it's a mouthful) or 致命游戏 which means fatal game

Adapted From: Danmei (BL) Kaleidoscope of Death by Xi Zixu

Novel Prints: There are GORGEOUS Thai, Vietnamese, Simplified and Traditional Chinese versions printed, AND Singapore publisher Rosmei has signed the license for the ENGLISH version, probably going on sale this year (preview is here). You can still access fan translations by Taida on I think wordpress and someone else on Tumblr sorry bad memory (they did half and half each) if you'd like to read it for context. It is one of my FAVE danmeis EVER and I am a die-hard OG book fan, check out my full danmei review here.

Total Episodes: 78 (20 minutes each with the exception of last episode which 10 minutes, with several BTS not that I think we will get to see all of them yet)

Where to Watch (LOL): Erm considering that iQIYI China AND International took the episodes down, there is no legal way to watch this, BUT thanks to some cnetz with super fast and great wifi, we managed to get ripped HD versions without subs. iQIYI is very hard on copyright though, they've taken down several subbed and unsubbed versions already on YouTube, but you should type the titles of show into Twitter and the top tags will tell you where to access the raws and very little subbed episodes, that may also be taken down at any point. I have the Chinese raws but as it's hosted on a cloud, I had to pay to access it.

Main Characters: Lin Qiushi & Ruan Nanzhu/Ruan Baijie (in the novel) and Ling Jiushi & Ruan Nanzhu/Ruan Baijie (in the drama)

Produced By: iQIYI so for SURE they won't film it fully BL even if the original is, but I've seen enough bromance cuts

Main Actors: Xia Zhiguang (Ruan Nanzhu/Ruan Baijie) + Huang Junjie (Ling Jiushi)

2. Summary

Book (drama follows closely if not removing the supernatural premises): Lin Qiushi, a designer, opens the door to his home one day from inside and sees 12 iron doors outside. Confused, he opens one of them and arrives at a snow covered village in the mid of winter, and meets Ruan Baijie, who's a pretty, unusually tall and whiny/timid woman. They realise that they're in a horrifying door game, and they'll have to find a door and a key to get out, while battling a long-haired, human-eating deity. They, along with a few others, have to survive day after day until they get out, and on the first night, two people have died in gory ways. Ruan Baijie and Lin Qiushi partner each other, and despite seemingly timid and crying all the time, she saves Lin Qiushi a few times mysteriously, and Lin Qiushi finds himself trusting in Ruan Baijie.

They get through the door together and when they leave successfully, Lin Qiushi realizes that the people who died in the door will die in real life by some freak accident too - car accidents, forced suicides, a robbery gone wrong, a lift trapped in the air and going ablaze, and more. That night, Lin Qiushi wakes up to see a super handsome and tall Ruan Nanzhu at his bedside and this man feels familiar to him, but he can't put a finger on it. All he can think of when Ruan Nanzhu says his name is Ruan Baijie (ahem he would later find out who it is of course). Ruan Nanzhu takes him to his mansion in the suburbs where he meets a group of other people just like them, who're forced to go through the doors for survival. Ruan Nanzhu then invites him to join Obsidian, his organization.

Through various doors, Lin Qiushi grows and supports a super intelligent and powerful Ruan Nanzhu, falls in love with him, gets through many many scary doors with him and some of their other team members, makes friends, loses them to the cruelty of the doors as they ponder over what the door means, and what being alive/dying means.

And at the end of it, at the end of of it all, when they're all good and living their life, Lin Qiushi also finds out what Ruan Nanzhu's secret is, and the lengths to which Ruan Nanzhu went to, just to be with him.

Drama: Ling Jiushi is a VR game designer who gets pulled into a game, and he meets Ruan Baijie (in his male form) right off the bat (SO NOT CROSSDRESSING I AM SAD). All the parts are actually the same as the novel, albeit with the game setting and Ling Jiushi and Ruan Nanzhu's identity adjustments to suit the game premise. Most of the other doors and their lines are the same, just that the ending is a bit more confusing than it could be. There's a big bad as well and they actually show the opposing organizations when in the novel, these other organizations aside from Obsidian didn't even actually have a face or goal to them.

3. Characters

^ Them in the book (based on manhua that never got to go live LOL) (RNZ/RBJ left, LQS right)

^ Them in the show (LJS left, RNZ right)

Ruan Nanzhu/Ruan Baijie: MY HANDSOME CROSSDRESSING INTELLIGENT ALOOF BUT WHINY (WHEN IT COMES TO LIN QIUSHI) SASSY BOSS!!!! He's super mysterious and super thick-skinned too, and all he wants is Lin Qiushi's attention the moment he meets him. He's intrigued by Lin Qiushi's calm and his brains and the way he handles things, and has a lot of trust for him right from the get-go. This is also shown in the drama itself. As the leader of Obsidian, he cares a lot for his team members and his friends even if he doesn't show it most of the time, and the last thing he wants to do is lose Lin Qiushi, and he would do ANYTHING for Lin Qiushi, ANYTHING!!! Just look at him whining:

Ling Jiushi (Lin Qiushi): In the novel he's super calm, has quite a lot of brains, a little bit of a blur in the beginning but he's super smart as well. Worries a lot for Ruan Nanzhu and is also a loyal friend to some of his only friends, and feels a lot when he loses them. Falls gradually in love with Ruan Nanzhu in the novel, like they just belong together. In this drama, Ling Jiushi holds that same trust for Ruan Nanzhu, but in demeanour he seems a bit more like a klutz and and not as cool as he was in the novel, but I guess it's acceptable. Literally like the only thing he loves more than RNZ (maybe) is his cat Chestnut LOL and RNZ is NOT really happy about that but Chestnut LOVES RNZ

Yixie and Qianli: CUTEST TWINS ;-; WHO TREAT RNZ and LQS as their big brothers LOOK AT THEM BOWING AND RNZ/LJS like parents LMAO

A handful of other characters who will keep turning up and get your hearts ;-;

4. ALL FAVE BROMANCE MOMENTS + TROPES

THEY TOUCH EACH OTHER A LOT LIKE HOLDING HANDS AND TOUCHING FACES, PIGGY BACKING?!?! DID I MENTION FACE TOUCHING

WHUMP WHUMP WHUMP WHUMP THEY HELP EACH OTHER WHEN HURT OR GET HURT FOR EACH OTHER

AND WHEN THEY WAKE UP IN BED THE OTHER IS AT THEIR BEDSIDE

AND DID I MENTION HE FEEDS HIM IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE

AND THAT THEY DATED UNDER THE FIREWORKS LIKE THE NOVEL DOES NOT EVEN HAVE THIS SHIT

AND THE KABEDONS

AND FINALLY RUAN NANZHU RIZZ OMG

5. Settings

They REALLY OUTDID THEMSELVES. THIS JUST FROM DOORS 1-6:

THEY LOOK EXACTLY LIKE THE NOVEL DESCRIBED!!!!

6. Overall Thoughts

PROS: This was NOT a cheap production, I'm telling you, they followed the cases very well and there're a lot of super recognisable lines, if not ALL of them, even if they changed the cases a little. I think they did it because in the novel originally, the author DOES leave a lot of details hanging like someone dies and you know he had a background and there are some shady things happening but the author NEVER actually goes into detail. So the drama did their best to cover these loopholes, even if it felt a little awkward at times. Money went into settings and attires and every damn thing, this looks EXPENSIVE. And if you've ever imagined each door and the bosses inside in your head, you might have felt chills go down your spine because damn did they really colour the book's settings for me (despite its differences). DID I MENTION that Xia Zhiguang really got the damn memo and he was a passable Ruan Nanzhu/Ruan Baijie who knew how to turn on his BL eyes. PLUS they really did some of the character deaths really well - they're technically some of the biggest parts of this story so ;-; (not two main of course)

CONS (maybe): They did away with the supernatural/horror premise and replaced it with a GAME premise, which means that there's a scientific element to it and the try to explain away stuff with the game, including the ending. I don't 100% get the ending, but the feel/vibe is about the same. Might not be for hardcore reader fans tho! They skipped out on a couple of doors, some of which were my faves, but it's fine, it's long enough LOL. They give away/explain some of the clues and surprises super early which means you don't get that added boom at the back as well. Despite that, I have to say they tried to round up the loopholes from the book as much as they could and give it an explanation while tying elements/conspiracies across doors (probably also to save cast fees LOL). And as always it's not a solid ending, it's an open confusing one, and even more confusing than the book itself because THERE IS NO CERTAIN HAPPILY EVER AFTER WITH HUBBY for it (there is in the book tho, they live together happily every after). Secondl,y, I'd say HJJ's acting is a bit stiff and OOC compared to the novel, but Xia Zhiguang really made up for it.

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HOPE THIS HELPS YOU GUYS!!! But I guess if you need subs it's going to be a long LONGGGG ride, considering that iQIYI doesn't seem to be going to be able to put it up anytime soon CRIES.

#the spirealm #致命游戏 #zhi ming you xi #kaleidoscope of death #kod #kod la #danmei #dangai #bl drama #asianlgbtqdramas #死亡万花筒 #lin qiushi #ling jiushi #ruan nanzhu #xia zhiguang #huang junjie

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navybrat817 · 9 months

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Ladies and Gentlemen

Pairing: Tattoo Artist!Bucky Barnes x Baker!Female Reader Summary: Bucky reflects on you and your date the morning after. Word Count: Over 1.9k Warnings: Tension, flirting, brief moments of insecurity, implied sexy times, slight feels (it's me), Bucky Barnes (he's a warning, okay?). Graphics talent and thanks: Banner by @sgt-seabass. Divider by @firefly-graphics. Bucky edit by Nix. Moodboard by yours truly. Previous Part of AU: Technically Innocent and Sinful, but posted part is Sundresses and Leather A/N: A bit more Hottie and Sugar from our Sin on Skin AU and you voted to go to his place! ❤️ I realize that I've skipped over Innocent and Sinful for now, but I really wanted to showcase Bucky and his feelings regarding the date and you. Beta read by the lovely @whisperlullaby (thank you for spitballing), but any and all mistakes are my own. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

Bucky hummed to himself as he made breakfast, doing his best to move quietly around the kitchen. He normally only hummed along to the radio in his car, which you discovered during your date the night before, but he couldn’t help himself today. He was happy. He had a spring in his step he hadn’t realized was missing.

Turns out, the thing he was missing was you.

“So. My place or yours?”

Tiptoeing back to his bedroom, Bucky saw you asleep peacefully in his bed. It was a sight he could get used to. Your gentle breathing and serene expression brought a small smile to his face as he leaned against the doorframe. When he woke up earlier with you in his arms he feared for a moment that he was dreaming again, like he had in his shop. But when he placed a kiss on your forehead and received a sleepy moan in response, he knew it was real.

So was the night before.

Bucky held back a groan as some of the images of the two of you together replayed in his mind, his eyes closing and only serving to enhance what he was already thinking about. He wanted to be a gentleman to you. He tried. After your last prick of a boyfriend, you sure as hell deserved that. Which was one of the reasons he was making you breakfast, as tempted as he was to climb back in bed and wake you.

Told you I’d take care of you, Sugar.

You opened up to and for him so beautifully. You were nothing short of an angel. His angel. His Sugar. It was crazy to think like that after one date, but there was something there and that was before he took you out. And you already planned what the next two dates would be, which he was looking forward to.

Even if our first date didn’t go as planned.

It turned out for the best. Even better than he could’ve imagined. He refrained from leaving a negative review online at that restaurant for mixing up his reservation, which was a blessing in disguise. The place was far from his style, but he saw it as a chance to impress you when his other plans fell through. He should’ve known better and gone with his instinct to take you to a place like Antonia’s from the start.

The smile slipped from his face as he remembered you talking about your mom, his fists lightly clenching. If he ever had the chance to meet her, he’d have a hard time staying silent about how she treated you. As if you sensed the sudden tension rise within him, you shifted closer to his side of the bed and rubbed the spot with your hand. The sight soothed him. For you to tell him something so vulnerable, to trust him, gave him a glimpse of how strong you truly were. Because it took strength to open up and stay kind when others tried to knock you down.

I’ll catch you.

Silently dashing back to the kitchen so he didn’t burn anything on the stove, he pushed the thought of your mom out of his mind as he finished up. He wasn’t going to focus on the negatives today. Not when he had you at his place. Maybe he could convince you to stick around for a bit after breakfast if you didn’t have plans.

Before he had a chance to wake you, someone knocked three times on the front door.

Steve.

He wondered if the noise woke you as he glanced down the hall, but he didn’t hear any movement as he headed toward the door and yanked it open before Steve could knock again. Sure enough, his best friend had his fist closed and ready. “Not dressed?” he asked as he lowered his arm.

With a shrug, Bucky glanced down at himself. “I’m wearing sweatpants,” he said, which he only put on to cook for you. “What are you doing here? It’s my day off.”

“Is that how you greet your best friend, jerk? After I came all the way over here?” He asked, looking back and forth as he pushed his way inside. “You weren’t answering your phone and you usually don’t sleep this late.”

“Come on in, punk. And don’t act like you drove across town to see me. We live in the same building,” Bucky said sarcastically as he shut the door. “So because I didn’t answer my phone on my day off, you decided to come over? Really? You’re spying, which you’re terrible at because you’re a terrible liar.”

The blonde pushed his hair back as his gaze swept the apartment. “I’m not spying, but come on. You have to tell me something. Jake and Hal won’t shut up in the group chat. Even Andy asked about your date and you’ve ignored everyone,” he argued, following Bucky to the kitchen.

Bucky couldn’t find it in himself to feel annoyed at Steve showing up or at the rest of the guys for wanting to know how the night went. They looked out for and supported each other. The fact that they all liked you made them root for the two of you more. “I wasn’t trying to ignore you guys,” he said, not saying he didn’t answer anyone since he was preoccupied with you.

“So, how did it go?” Steve asked, a hopeful look in his eyes.

Perfect because it was with Sugar.

“Minus getting rained on and the restaurant screwing up the reservation, just fine,” he said, giving a quick rundown of some of the details. He left out the heart-to-heart conversation in your bakery. Steve was his best friend, but that wasn’t any of his business.

“It didn’t go the way you wanted to, but it was ‘just fine’? Judging by that smile on your face, I take it the date went well,” Steve said.

Very well.

Bucky managed not to smirk as he set out two coffee mugs. “A gentleman never tells. Now do me a favor and get the hell out of my apartment. My breakfast is getting cold.”

“I know you have an appetite, but this much food?” Steve said, nodding to the two plates. “Considering I showed up unannounced and you already had two plates out, I’m guessing you weren’t planning on feeding me.”

“Mmm. Something smells delicious. Oh! Hi, Steve.”

Bucky sucked in a breath when he turned his head and drank in the sight of you. You had a sleepy expression on your face, which was adorable, but it was the fact that you were wearing one of his shirts that made his heart stop in his chest. You toyed with the hem as you smiled, your gaze on him and not on Steve. He wondered if it would be too much to ask you to wear one of his shirts while you worked in the bakery.

I can have a dress made out of one of my shirts, right?

“Good to see you.” Steve smirked before he looked at his friend. “A gentleman never tells, huh?”

Bucky allowed himself to smirk this time. “I didn’t say a word.”

“Oh, he’s very much a gentleman,” you said as you joined Bucky and slid an arm around his waist. His arm instinctively went around your back, his fingers gently touching you through the fabric. “He’s also a sorcerer. Or maybe a magician. I’m not sure which.”

Steve’s brows furrowed as he glanced at Bucky. “You’re a what?”

“Well,” you said slowly, biting your lip before you looked at Bucky. “There’s this magical thing he does with his tongue where-”

The blonde held a hand up to stop you. “And that’s my cue to leave.”

Yeah, because my cue of telling you to leave wasn’t enough, Punk. Now go so I can do that thing with my tongue again.

“Told you a gentleman never tells,” Bucky stated, pulling you closer by the waist. It amazed him how perfectly you two fit together. “I never said anything about my girl speaking.”

Your eyes lit up at the small endearment, making his heart race. “Should I tell him about your massive-”

“Text me later!” Steve said, giving you a small smile before he quickly showed himself out.

Bucky chuckled when the door shut. “Don’t let his modest act fool you. He’s far from innocent,” he joked. Steve respected women though.

“I think he was trying to act like a gentleman for my sake,” you teased. “And if Tess knew where you lived, she probably would’ve shown up, too.”

With a chuckle, he nodded in agreement. “How’d you sleep? I would’ve stayed in bed with you, but I wanted to make you breakfast.”

Are you sore? Do I need to take care of you?

“I slept very well, thank you. And breakfast in bed sounds like the perfect way to start the day,” you said, touching his cheek. He could stay wrapped up in bed with you all day if you'd let him. “Did you sleep okay?”

“Best night of sleep I’ve had since I can remember,” he answered honestly, his eyes soft as a full blown smile spread across your face.

You leaned in to brush your lips against his before you stopped yourself, some of the light fading from your eyes. “Sorry. I haven’t brushed my teeth and my breath probably stinks-”

Bucky closed the gap to kiss your lips. He didn’t care if you brushed your teeth or not. “Taste sweet to me, Sugar,” he whispered, taking possession of your mouth again to leave you breathless. He wanted to taste every part of you and sweep away any insecurities or doubts that tried to take over.

You pulled away to take a breath. “Keep kissing me like that and I won’t eat this breakfast you worked so hard on.”

“Did you purposely say ‘hard on’?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at you. “And I don’t mind feeding you my-”

You covered his mouth with your hand, giggling. “Don’t you dare say what I think you’re going to say.”

He licked his lips when you moved your hand away. “I was going to say I don’t mind feeding you my food,” he told you with a blank expression since he couldn’t feign innocence. “You’re a dirty girl for jumping to conclusions.”

“I’m not a dirty girl. I’m a lady,” you protested, inhaling sharply as he began to back you up against the counter.

“You look good in my shirt. Really good,” he said, his voice gravelly and low as he flexed his fingers on your hips. “Tell me to stop, Sugar. I already wore you out once and you need to eat so you have your strength.”

Because I want to ruin you all over again.

“So I have my strength? You sure I didn’t wear you out, Hottie?” You questioned.

He found himself laughing as you tilted your chin up. Not at you. Never at you. No, it was that happiness creeping back in at how the two of you fell in sync. The banter, the ease. He wished you could see yourself through his eyes and feel what he did.

He’d continue to find ways to show you how special you were.

“How about we agree that we wore each other out? I think that’s what happened.”

You gave him a single nod. “Looking forward to us wearing each other out again.”

Me, too, Sugar. Me, too.

He's a dream, isn't he? Love and thanks for reading! 💙

Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

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mangocustard16 · 2 months

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FIRST DATE (VERNON'S VERSION)

genre: fluff, headcanon warnings: first date nerves, kiss(cheek) wc: 400 a/n: thank you anon! please reblog if you enjoyed, feedback is always appreciated

first of all, he was nervous about asking you out. it was probably months of pining over you, planning things out, and just waiting for the perfect opportunity to ask

when he finally did, it was more like, "Hey...would...date...with...me"

picks you up from your house, with flowers, and opens the door for you so politely that you almost get the impression that he's acting strange

the two of you would probably go and see a movie for your first date and grab some popcorn before the movie starts

after finishing your popcorn before the movie even starts, you'll have to run back to buy some more

vernon doesn't pay you much attention he is way too absorbed in the movie for his own good

if you go to the bathroom during the interval, he buys you more snacks, so you can't argue or try to split the bill.

has a lot of thoughts about the movie so far so, tells you everything he's come up with

you've come to the conclusion, that this guy is a complete nerd and writes half of his reviews during intervals so he doesn't miss anything

his ears turn so red when your hands brush against his while reaching for the popcorn

suggests grabbing a bite to eat at a nearby diner

he excitedly discusses the movie's themes, character development, and any easter eggs he noticed

is very interested in your thoughts about the movie

is so flustered when you compliment him that he accidentally spills your drink, apologizing profusely and offering to pay for a replacement

the conversations with him are really deep

he prefers to really get to know you, the real you, and answers all your questions very seriously

the conversations flow so effortlessly that you don’t even realize how much time has passed until the sun starts to set

internally takes notes of everything

what you're wearing, what he's wearing, the way you almost fall out of your seat laughing

'accidentally' links his pinky with you while walking back to the car

mhmm sounds right

he's driving you back home, almost pops out a ring when you play his favorite underground artist

tells you that he had so much fun and is down for another date

doesn't expect any kisses or anything

but if you kiss him on the cheek while leaving

oh boy, he’s going to think about it all night

@kflixnet @k-films@k-labels taglist-˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅: @bangchansbae @haecien @aaniag @aaasia111 @weird-bookworm @gigification @bewoyewo if you want to be added just send me an ask ♡⸝⸝

pls reblog if you liked !!

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certifiedbueckethead · 1 month

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horror film 🎞️ ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

paige bueckers x horror movie fan!reader

warnings: public sex, fingering

word count: 2.1k

a/n: hey <3 this was a request, I hope I wrote this to your liking :) please let me know if you have any other requests <3

readers pov:

For months you’ve seen trailers and you’ve gotten super excited for the release of the film, "Smile". You knew Paige can barely sit through Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, so even asking her to see an actual horror film wasn’t something you were planning on doing.

After straightening your long dark hair and putting on a simple, comfy outfit consisting of one of short, black cropped tank top and a pair of sweatpants you walk out of your room to your living room of your shared dorm. You shared it with Paige and a few of her teammates, so when you walk into the room it’s filled with voices and laughter. Paige, who is sitting on the couch glances up from her phone and gives you a warm smile. She gets up and walks over to you and brings your hips closer to you. “Hi there, pretty.”, she says, grinning widely. “Hi there Paigey”, you reply, pecking her lips. She places a soft kiss on your forehead before pulling you closer to her in her arms. “What's up my sweet girl, you going out? Your hair is so nice.”, she says, reaching up to play with it.

You debate telling her where you’re going because you’re afraid that she’ll want to come along and you didn’t want her to get scared. But, you couldn’t lie to save your life. “Just going to see a movie.”, you say, hugging her back. “Oh which one, let me get changed and we can go together, no need to go alone.”, she says, pulling away from you to go get changed. “P, it’s a horror film, it’s okay you don’t have to come, I just really wanted to see it, I don’t mind going alone.”, you say, in a reassuring tone. Paige turns around to face you and blinks a few times, you can tell she is trying to decide if she wants to come in her head. “Uhm, maybe we could see something else that’s not too scary you know, horror films have bad acting and it’s just really lame.”, she says, clearly wanting to spend the evening with you.

KK shouts out from the couch, “AWE IS PAIGE AFRAID??”, giggling, very much trying to rile her up. Azzi joins in and decides to tease her as well, “It’s okay Paige if you’re scared, we can put some cocomelon on until Y/n get’s back.”, she jokes. Paige, competitive as she is, refuted back, “No I know the film is scary, I don’t want her getting scared you know.”, she says, crossing her arms. You laugh to yourself, you know her well enough but you decide to see how far she’ll go.

Paige gets ready and you both head out, you driving in case the movie really shakes her up. You’ve seen reviews on the film since it came out a few days ago and you know it’s pretty terrifying. You stop at the nearest bulk barn, running in for a minute while leaving Paige in the car - as much as she tries to convince you to let her go in, you know she’ll take her sweet time. You get a few of her favorite snacks and put them in your bag so you can sneak it into the movie theater. Let’s be real, movie theater food is overpriced, and as a college student you weren’t willing to drop $100 knowing that you and Paige love your snacks.

You drive over to the theater and Paige gets a blanket that she had put in the backseat to bring in and a plushie. She’s absolutely adorable, and you both know she is scared but you don’t mention it. It was clear enough she didn’t want to damage her ego in front of her teammates over a simple movie. She reaches for your hand as you walk towards the building, and you squeeze her hand to reassure her. “Paigey, I got some snacks for us and I got the tickets while I waited for you to change so all we have to do is scan.”, you tell her and she hums in response, probably nervous.

The movie starts and you both sit in the back corner, away from most of everyone else. It’s semi packed, which isn’t surprising because it’s a bit later in the evening on a weekday, people have work or school in the morning so you were glad it wasn’t too packed.

The usual movie advertisements start to play and you pass Paige her snacks, seeing her wrapped in the blanket she brought, shoes off and had taken advantage of the fact that the armrest could move up and she had her feet on your lap. She’s scrolling through her phone, still nervous and you decide to say something. “Paigey, come on you don’t have to sit through this, you won’t be able to sleep through the night.”, you tell her, concerned. She shakes her head, not taking her eyes off her phone. You feel your phone buzz a few times, and she’s going through your highlights on instagram and reliking all the photos in them. How cute.

The movie begins and Paige is okay, until it starts to pick up. She had moved her feet off of you and was curled into a ball, hiding her face under the blanket. You set a hand on her knee, to give her a bit of comfort. A few jump scares later, she is hiding her head in your shoulder and you feel her body shaking a bit. You laugh, she chose this for herself but let her confidence overtake her. You rub her back gently, and the movie is about halfway finished when she looks genuinely terrified.

“Paige, okay come here.”, you stand up and grab her shoes, leaving the rest of your stuff on the seats. To your dismay, those damn theater chairs flip up when you get up, suffocating all of your stuff. Paige, finding this funny giggles a bit, and you are glad that she took her mind off the film for a moment. You take her hand and lead her out of the screening room and to the bathroom. Once you both find an empty stall you go into it together and you pull her into your arms. “Paige.”, is all you say as she clings to you, and you rock side to side. It was a wholesome moment for the both of you, you usually don’t see her like this - but the fact that people are flushing the toilets around you slightly ruined it.

You peck both of her cheeks, her nose, her forehead and then her lips and you can tell she is already feeling a bit better. “We don’t have to finish the film lovely, I can grab our stuff and we can go, would you like that?”, you suggest and Paige returns with a nod, staring at the floor. “No honey, it’s okay don’t be upset okay? I swear, I can see this film another time.”, you tell her, looking her in her pretty eyes to make sure she understands. She clears her throat, “Can I.”, she pauses and looks up to you. “Can I make it up to you perhaps, I don’t know it doesn’t sit right that you had to miss your movie so at least let me make it up to you.”, she tells you and you cup her cheeks. “No sweetheart, you don’t have to worry about anything okay?”, you tell her, not knowing what she was even referring to. Before you know it, she's getting down on her knees and playing with the strings on your sweatpants. Looking up at you for your approval, you pause. “Paige really, it’s alright.”, you try to reason with her, you didn’t want to force her to do something especially when she was just having a rough time. “It’ll take my mind off the movie mamas, I like seeing my pretty girl get weak under my touch and I like tasting you. It’s so much more sweet than the candy.”, she says, whispering.

Considering that you were talking pretty normally beforehand in the washroom , you are surprised she decided to speak quieter, but it would be pretty embarrassing to get caught like this. You agree with her, and let her do her thing.

Paige pulls down your sweatpants, letting them pool at your feet. She gently grabs your hips, pushing your back against the stall. She begins to run her hands against your now naked thighs, and you shiver. How is it April and the air conditioning is on like it is mid-July? Paige lifts your tank top up just over your belly button and places warm kisses against you. Suddenly, all that you need is her touch. She makes her way to your underwear, plays with the pastel pink lace and lovingly runs her tongue against your clothed clit. You feel yourself shiver a bit and she reaches for your hand, holding it softly. She uses her other hand to slide down your lace underwear, pooling at your feet along with your sweatpants now. She takes this as an opportunity to slide a finger between your folds, feeling the pool of wetness that occurred to all of her gentle advances. Her lips meet your clit, and you feel yourself buck your hips due to the lack of touch. You and Paige haven’t fucked in a while, it’s been hard since all of your roommates are in the off season and all enjoy rotting in the house. Every time you tried something, you were always interrupted. So this, this is what you need.

Paige begins to suck slowly on your clit, and you use the hand that isn’t holding her’s to cover your mouth to quiet yourself. You are starting to feel glad that she didn’t listen to you earlier when you had told her she didn’t have to do this. You let yourself unravel under her touch, you let her do her work as she makes you closer and closer to finishing, dipping her tongue into you whilst looking up at you, in your eyes. You could barely take it, she was doing so well. You loved being talked through it, but this was different. The fact that anyone could catch on and figure out what the two of you was driving you over the edge. Paige has switched from using her tongue in you, to curling 3 fingers into your dripping wet cunt. You start to panic and the wet noises become too loud, but you couldn’t control it - it was all of her doing. Paige, no longer looking distressed like she did earlier, looked so hot. Cheeks flushed pink, hair in a messy ponytail so it didn’t get in her way and her lips glistening with your wetness. The two of you couldn’t help smiling at each other as you were reaching your high.

You feel yourself getting closer and you finally get that familiar feeling in your stomach as Paige is slowly fucking you with her long fingers. Her nails are fairly short, but since it has been a while they’ve grown out a bit more than usual and you could feel them inside you and it felt absolutely heavenly. You needed to cum, you had to, it's been too long since the last time you had the chance to. You grip her hand and try to move it away, you were going to be loud no matter how hard you tried. Paige, looking back at you, took out her fingers, and finished you off with her tongue. Before you knew it, you had finished on her face and gasp left your lips. Paige had the most goofy grin on her face, knowing that she was able to do this for you.

You finally calmed down and reached down for some toilet paper, and cleaned her face for her and she helped you pull up your bottoms, and when she finally stood she kissed you. It was so loving, not as needy as she had made you earlier. “Paigey, you did so well.”, you tell her, rubbing her nose against her’s. You feel her smile against your lips when you kiss her again, and she holds your hand as you leave the stall to retrieve your stuff.

You both end up giggling, seeing everyone leaving the screening room, knowing the movie was over. Paige calls out from behind you, as you are walking up the steps to get your stuff, ‘Please ma, don’t tell the team I got scared, it’ll make me look weak.”. You continue to giggle and pick up your stuff. “Sure P, whatever you say.”, you tell her, while passing her the blanket. “Maybe you should take Azzi and KK next time to see a horror film, because if I tag along, I will be expecting us to do this again mamas”, Paige says, poking your waist. You playfully push her and shake your head, “You know, that may not be a bad idea P.”

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