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etfrin · 5 months

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⤷❝ The Quiet Gift | Coriolanus Snow❞ˎˊ-

⇢☾Warning: NSFW | squirting, Snow is his own warning, mentions of killing, possessiveness, fingering (f. receiving), bathroom sex, mirror sex, semi-public sex (there was a gala), pinv sex, creampie, unprotected sex (wrap it dumbfucks), dumbfication if you squint, dom sub undertones, degradation, ownership kink, breath play with a twist | lmk if I forgot anything!

⇢☾Pairing: young president Coriolanus Snow x fem! Reader

⇢☾Summary: continuation of the arranged marriage au, this is your one year anniversary with him with a gala held in place to celebrate, you get insecure because of some bitches and Coryo fucks you in the bathroom with sprinkles of your daily life with him.

⇢☾Request: this is a request (idk if i’m writing it in the write place im new to tumblr i usually use wattpad) young coriolanus snow bathroom mirror sex like him making u watch ur self come undone in the mirror

⇢☾A/N: enjoy everyone! And to one who requested, hope you like this! :) this might be my last post of this theme btw, i am getting sick of the blue :/

arranged marriage au: the study, mine to love

< masterlist > < bc: @cafekitsune > < tag list >

A year had passed of your marriage, a bond between two souls which wasn't much of a lie as before. Things with Coryo were better than you could ever expect. You thought he would isolate himself from you after your confession but so much had changed. He had gotten softer but more possessive. His edges are sharp yet he makes sure it's a shield for you, not something that would make you bleed.

Among his actions include changing your entire wardrobe (not without your opinion first), a library that connects to his office (his office is something you have access to at all times now), his room was now yours both (your favorite change), and last but not least a poison taster was included so that no attempts of assassination at the First Lady could be taken.

At first, you thought it to be extra, but knowing that it would put his paranoid mind at peace you allow it without much to say. He picked out your outfit every day, and sometimes you did the same for Coriolanus. He would frown as you decide what to wear or not for him for the day, knowing that some of the pieces don't match his style but when he sees your smile as you pick out the clothes. He smooths his frown and takes whatever horrible fashion statement you created for him and wears it with pride.

If anyone dared to speak up about it, he proudly said that his wife picked it out and everyone knew better than to speak a single ill word of the unspoken Queen of Panem.

Today was one of those days when you decided to pick his outfit. Today was something special after all. One year had passed since you had become Mrs. Snow, and a gala was to be held tonight to celebrate the union.

So yes, you were going to pick his outfit. You had even woken up early because of it. You giggled as you opened your eyes, your arm around Coryo whose hair looked impossibly messy, sticking out everywhere. It made him look years younger than he was. You chuckled at the sight, your heart clenching with the love you have for this man. You lean forward to press a kiss to his forehead and then his cheek. You whispered, not expecting him to wake up until his alarm rang, “Good morning, Coryo”

You quietly slipped away from the bed and tiptoeed to the closet. The closet you both shared now. One side carrying every single piece of your clothing and the other side his. You wanted to pick out something different for your husband once, sick of seeing him in his white shirts and black vest. That's how you picked out a black suit with a white vest and a red silk shirt. You could imagine unbuttoning this off of him tonight and the thought made your body heat up and a giggle escaped your lips.

“What are you laughing about, doll?” A voice, his deep sleepy voice startling you. “Nothing!” You quickly said, turning to look at Snow, your breath hitching as his eyes were half closed and his hair turned into a mess of curls. Sometimes you wonder if this was all a fever dream and if you truly have the privilege of seeing him like this. You placed the clothes into a corner and went to him.

You pulled him down, your hand on his nape and another on his cheek as you guided him to your lips. Morning breath be damned. His actions were reflexive with how his arms pulled you in closer as his lips pressed into yours. He smiles against your lips and soon both of your tongues tangle in an uncoordinated sleepy manner and you whimper into his mouth.

This was real. This was your reality and you would do everything to keep it as it is. You pulled back and he whispered, “What was that for, doll?”

“Just needed to make sure this was real,” you answered him. Your words make him crack a real smile, something even you saw rarely and it would only be possible in moments like this. Moments when you have shocked the man with your actions and words and made him fall harder for you.

“Well it is,” he grins. Before his expression clears up he focuses on the clothes you have set aside. “Outfit for today?” He asked. You nod and smile at him, gesturing at the clothes. “You would look handsome in them,” you said. “Don't I always look handsome?” He smirks, you laugh, “I am not falling for that trap, dear husband. I'll be in the shower, choose something for me.” You press a kiss on his cheek before leaving the closet.

After showering and wearing the red dress he had decided, both of you go on for your respective duties. The gala would start early in the day and there were a few hours left before it formally started as guests were already coming in.

The mansion was set up beautifully, no words could have possibly explained the amount of work and dedication to make this the event of the year, valued higher than the Hunger Games itself. In another universe, it may not have been possible, in this one however you somehow managed to crack into his heart and made yourself a higher priority.

You were doing finishing touches of your makeup when Corio came in, his hair slicked back but his body tense, his eyes unable to hide the shakiness in them. You don't say anything, letting the man have his moment of vulnerability. You knew you would mess him up even more if you pointed it out, so you continued your task.

You didn't pay him any attention despite the itch to turn to him. You force yourself to stare straight into the mirror, applying your lipstick for the night. That was until he came behind you, his arms around your waist and pulled you against his chest, his head propped on your shoulder as you felt him take deep breaths.

You don't ask if anything is wrong, accepting the rare form of intimacy he initiated. Usually, you're the ones for the hugs, the genuine ones anyway. You knew despite everything you were like a math equation to Snow. His mind figured out the formulas to keep you to him forever, you doubted if he saw anyone as his equal but you were perhaps the closest thing to it.

You had accepted it long before, but moments like this when Coriolanus allowed himself to be a human meant everything to you. You fell for every version of him, the one that is an untouchable deity who could kill you without guilt, and the human he was, obsession filling in veins making you the sole objective of his mind as he already achieved Panem.

You close your eyes, taking deep breaths with him. In the end, you were human too and you broke. “What's wrong?” You asked, as softly as possible yet breaking the bubble that had formed.

He smirks through the mirror, his eyes meeting yours, a sense of superiority in the blue hues. “Nothing’s wrong, my doll,” he whispered to you, pressing a ghost-like kiss to your bare shoulder. His arms cage you tighter, making a small gasp on your lips. “Okay,” you smile at him.

“Ready to start the gala then?” You asked, “Snows are born ready,” he replied, his tone smug.

One of his arms was kept wrapped around his waist while the other opened a drawer to take out a small box. “For you,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to your neck. You opened the box, and in it was a gold necklace with the initial ‘S’. You blush, and leave it to Corio to give you a necklace with his initials for an anniversary gift. “It’s beautiful,” you whispered, your head turning back and you gave him the brightest smile. “Help me wear it?” You mumbled as you handed him the box.

And so he did, and now a necklace was on your neck, the letter ‘S’ sitting perfectly on your skin. It scratched an innate itch for Snow to see you wear this. A part of him had expected you to fight, and be disgusted by this action, his mind thinking of several ways to make (force) you to wear the necklace. But as always you surprised him with your acceptance, as if you knew that wearing this would help him with his possessiveness. You were truly the right woman for him.

With his arm around your waist, you walk into the celebration. Countless people, the top elites of the Capitol were attending the gala. Everything had to be perfect.

Alas, fate is nothing but fickle.

The rumors didn't catch your ears at first before slowly the whispers caught up to you. Too busy with your life in the mansion and with Coriolanus, you rarely were social. You never had many friends from the capitols' elites. And those who knew were merely allies for the future. So the gossip never reached your ears.

Gossip you knew better to believe. Words change when they travel mouth to mouth. It can be easily manipulated too, your husband was a living proof of that. The snake tongue of all of Panem. But when the words seemed to get louder and louder, you couldn't help but feel maybe it's tinged with truth.

Snow was busy talking to diplomats while you were politely having a conversation with the ladies. That's when the questions began about some things they had heard about Snow. Each worse than the other but nothing you didn't already know. You make sure to change their perspective whenever something new comes up. Coriolanus was still new at this position, anything could snatch the power away if either of you weren't careful.

Feeling like you have finished the job, you begin to move away, only to stop when you hear, “...even wearing a pendant with his initial, she's nothing more than a whore who was pushed up to play the role of the First Lady. A woman of her standing would never deserve such a title.”

It was true, when Snow asked you to marry you, it was sudden and he gained nothing from it. Nothing, no money, power, and just a few connections you had but he had already impressed them all beforehand so there was no need for you. Your history in the academy wasn't all that great either, you were never the best but wholly average. A man like Snow deserved the best.

Insecurity claws at your heart and even so with recent events you knew their words were wrong. Tears burned your eyes. Your hand goes to the necklace you had on, your fingers twirling the pendant. Meanwhile, despite Coriolanus' focus being mainly on talking sweet to the guests and gathering sponsors, his eyes were on you, your every moment, and each person you spoke to. He notices you walking away from the gala and into the hallways. He followed you.

You were in one of the many bathrooms the manor had to offer. You stared at the mirror, the necklace you were wearing, and your hands traveled to the back ready to take it off. That's when Coriolanus enters the bathroom, his footsteps stopping midtrack as you freeze too.

“Coryo,” you begin to speak, your hand at your side now. “I was just-” “Why were you going to take it off?” He interrupted you, his face twisted in a glare you never thought would be directed at you. You shrugged, trying to play casual, “It doesn't feel appropriate.” “Why?” He questioned his tone icy calm, spreading chills down your spine. “Because-” because you didn't feel worthy of it. “Because you're ashamed of me,” he scoffs, walking closer to you. His eyes now fully glaring at you.

You frown, “What? Coryo, no-” He tilts your chin up, as he leans in, his expression twisted in fury, “Then what? There's no other appropriate reason for you to take it off then.” In truth, something was getting lost in translation, the women you were talking to earlier were going to be accused of treason in a few days. The cause? The rumors (some truth mixed in as well) they had spread about Snow. They were invited out of courtesy and after this, they had signed their death certificate.

“It's nothing like-” “Then what?” He hissed, “Did you finally come to your senses? Did they tell you how much of a horrible monster I am? And a horrible president?” You knew some sort of major miscommunication had happened but you had no idea how to deal with it. Not when Snow pressed a harsh, hard kiss to your lips, teeth clashing and his tongue seemingly fighting with yours for dominance that you easily gave over.

“You can't escape me, doll. No matter how horrible you realize I am. Think about running away and it's your dead body that will be leaving this mansion.” he whispered against your lips, his hands on your waist, your body flushed against his as your back hit the counter.

You chuckled at his words, knowing that would never be your end. His eyebrows furrow in confusion and it makes you giggle even further. “Dove, I am not joking,” he said, looking straight in your eyes. “I know,” you smile at him, “You…” you shake your head, smiling, you were surely crazier than him. You leaned up and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “Those women said something… mean and it made me realize I may not be worthy of this necklace…” you begin to explain, hoping the explanation would calm him down.

You thought wrong. “You don't think I can decide who deserves to be my property, pet. Whom I let to be my queen,” he said, his tone deeper than before. He whispered, “I decided it's you. It's been a year since that decision and I haven't regretted it once.”

He manovaroued you so you were facing the mirror. He was right behind you, his eyes hard. “The woman you're looking at right now is mine. My pet. My wife. How dare you try to take off a mark of my ownership, doll?” You opened your mouth to apologize, but a moan escaped instead as he bit into your shoulder. He begins to press you against the counter, your body bending over as he continues to press wet kisses on your nape.

“You need a reminder about whom you belong to,” he whispered, his lips brushing against your skin making you shiver, heat spreading to your body as his hands unzipped your dress from behind, letting the fabric fall on the floor. “I am yours,” you moan to him as his palms knead your breasts through the bra. “Then you should have known better, my stupid bird.”

“You look away from the mirror even once…,” he said, his hands squeezing your breasts roughly, his head propped up to your shoulder, his face set in a smirk, “and that group of women dies.” They were going to die either way but you didn't know that.

You gasp, “Snow- '' His hands squeeze your breasts harder, bordering on pain. “It’s Coryo for you, dove,” he said, slowly yet firmly as if talking to a child. His hands move downwards, one moves to your hip, and for the other, his fingers slip inside your panties. You whimper when his fingertip touches your clit. At any other time, he would have been slow, and gentle when he was rubbing the bud but now? His touch was fast and unconcerned, his sole goal was to inflict punishment with pleasure.

He rubbed at your clit relentlessly, making you soak your panties with your juices. His other hand squeezes your hips. You whine, your eyes closing and he pinches your clit making you moan louder than you should, your eyes opening immediately to meet his gaze.

“Only warning, pet,” he whispered, his finger now playing with the clit even more relentlessly. Back and forth, up and down with no mercy, making the bud swollen and your pussy clench around nothing. “Yes, Coryo,” you gasp.

“My dumb pet can learn after all,” he whispered to your ear and then his lips kissed the clasp of your necklace. His fingers abandon your clit to swipe at your folds to gather your wetness. He chuckles as he continues to tease you like this, his hard cock pressing against your ass.

“Coryo,” you whispered and your eyes connected with his and you knew his fingers could feel the flex of your cunt around nothing. “That's it. Look at me, doll.”

He slipped his fingers one by one into your slit, the stretch making you gasp. “It's too much,” you managed to get out, your voice shaky. “You can take it,” he tuts. His fingers begin to message your wall, hitting every crook and canny you never knew existed. He twisted his fingers thrusting right at your g-spot making you moan loudly, your body was now completely bent over in front of the mirror and your hands gripped the counter for life. Snow continues to playfully stretch you out, scissoring your pussy with his long fingers.

When he finally deemed you loose enough, he pulled his fingers out without a warning making you whimper. He pulls down your panties around your knees, and then his hand unzipped his pant to take his cock out. Something in you liked how he was composed and fully clothed while having you like this, primal and debauched. It showcased Coriolanus perfectly, no matter how prim and proper the man was outside in the end he was as much of a mess.

His impatient was clear with his clenched jaw, one of his hands traveling upwards your body to grip your breast like a handle as his free hand guides his leaking, hard cock into your entrance. “I was going to fuck you good tonight, on a bed properly like a wife deserves,” he begins to say as he pushed in with a single stroke. Your mouth lets out a small scream as your pussy adjusts to his dick. “Instead I have to treat you like a whore, bending your ass over a counter and fuck you while there are people all over the mansion.” He shakes his head disappointed, he meets your gaze, “I expected better, doll.”

“Then why keep a disappointment around,” you snapped at him, making him raise his eyebrows at your tone, his cock twitching inside your walls. “I wonder that myself too,” he grunts, his face buried in your shoulder, his tongue licking your salty skin. “You’re my everything,” he whispered, “Don't you forget that, dove.”

It was a confession that made you turn your back and made you catch his lips. He groans into your mouth as both of your tongues play with each other, expressing words the others cannot say. His free hand went to grip your necklace chain, making you gasp as he fisted the chain and pulled at it, knocking at your breath in one go.

His hips had begun to pound into you, short, hard thrusts that made his cockhead press against your g-spot while his remaining length messaged your walls perfectly. “You don't have to think, doll. I am here to think for you. You don't have to think about deserving me, or Panem. You don't have to think at all, just be my bird. My bird only,” he grunts.

Your eyes had begun to see spots from the lack of air, he hadn't seemed to care as your pussy keeps squeezing around him because of it. He lets go of the chain, making you gasp and you take the air you desperately need as his thrusts begin to get sloppier. Coryo was too impatient, too worked up, too mad at you to care about your pleasure. You were a pet getting used and you loved every second of it.

“I love you,” you whispered to him, and he groaned in response, as his thrusts got slower. He was edging himself to last longer, for this not to end. He bites your nape, not hard as he does usually to make sure the mark fades in a few seconds. His hips continue to rock into you, both of his hands now kneading at your clothed breast. He makes your round flesh spill from the bra and cups them with a groan escaping his lips.

“You’re mine,” he said as he pressed wet kisses all over your neck and shoulders, “Mine.” Your pussy clenched around him, making his pace get even slower, frustration begins to claw your mind as your body tethers to the edge. “Yours,” you agreed. “Fuck me faster,” you plead.

He lets out a laugh, “No. You'll take what I'll give.” “Coryo, my love please!” You begged. His hips stutter, making you feel confused, before realizing why he had stopped. You hadn't called him that since that night and you realized you had leverage on the man.

“My love, please! Fuck me harder,” you spill, “Baby, please!” He clenched his jaw trying so hard not to give in to the instinct of rutting into you like an animal. Knowing that he was near the edge, you continue, “Cum in me and make me walk around the gala with your cum inside, please. Please, mark me!”

That did the trick rather perfectly. His hand wraps around your throat, not choking you but staying there as a comforting presence that shouldn't have been comforting at all. “My dumb pet has ways with words. Gotta fuck that out of you, my dove,” he smirked.

His hips begin to roll into you again, making you gasp and squeeze his dick with your slick walls. The start of it was slow and cautious before Coriolanus decided to throw it all in the wind. He takes half of his length out before slamming it back to you. The sound of hips snapping echoed into the air along with his grunts and your moans. He kept fucking into you, with no care about anything.

Both of your sights were obscene in the mirror and it turned you not to end. Your body had begun to heat, your pussy aching to cum after being played with for so long. The tension in your body was close to snapping, and he knew it too. Knew it the way your cunt kept sucking his cock in so well. His head was on your shoulder, his mouth breathing out hot air onto your skin.

“Look at me,” you whispered, and his eyes snap at you and not even a second later he spills into your cunt, fucking his cum into you as he lets out a whine for the first time. You gasp, feeling your build-up fading without snapping but Snow was never to disappoint. He pulled his cock out, just to stuff you with his fingers. You whimper, your sensitive walls twitching around his fingers, so close to breaking.

Coriolanus doesn't waste a second to thrust into your sopping cunt, your folds covered in his cum, and fucking that into you with his fingers. He crooks his fingers perfectly, hitting your g-spot and making you black out for a second as his fingers keep assaulting your insides without a care.

You gasp, your body starting to give up. Snow has to wrap an arm around you to help you stay balanced. “That's it, doll. Cum on my fingers. I will make you cum on my cock later,” he promised to you. You cry out as his fingers continue their fast pace of thrusting. And finally, finally, your orgasm builds up again. A single graze from his fingertip onto your spongy spot has you not only cumming but squirting too.

Even Coriolanus eyes widen in surprise as you spill your juices onto the floor, ruining your dress and everything. You begin to feel ashamed of losing control in such a manner, but Coryo curses, “Fuck, doll. Fuck, that was…” He couldn't even finish the sentence.

You close your eyes, feeling yourself close to losing balance, only for Snow to swipe your legs from the floor and carry you to the bathtub.

“I’ll take care of you, doll,” he said, “I’ll bring in a new set of clothes, wait.” “What about the gala?” You asked. He kissed your temple before he replied, “I told everyone to leave the moment you walked away. Told everyone you were sick and as your husband, I shall be taking care of you.”

You let out a raspy chuckle, it was rather amazing how Coriolanus Snow always turned everything in his favor. Even this would help his image of being a president who took such good care of his wife and would surely take the country to great lengths.

“Snow lands on top,” you whispered to him with a smile.

Current tag list: @stelleduarte @nowitsmissing @lifeonawhim @le-lena @dollfacedalls @motley-baby @champomiel @slytherinholland @randomstuff2040 @justacaliforniandreamer @emmalinemalfoy @hyuk4s @theamuz @watercolorskyy

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mxmmyprentiss · 2 months

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I Miss You, I'm Sorry

Summary: Long story short, you survived without her. Her name had become a memory pushed and tucked away in the back of your mind. You locked it and threw away the key. You had stopped yourself from waiting for answers as to why she walked out on you or why she didn’t fight for you ages ago.

Well. Until now. Genre: Angst Pairing: Emily Prentiss x female reader Warnings: homophobia, parental abuse (?) Word count: 6.9k (I got carried away)

A/N: Hi, guys! I just made a new tumblr account and I'm new to Criminal Minds and I'm still actually just about to start season 4 lol but Emily Prentiss already got a chokehold on me and here I am. English is not my first language so any grammar/spelling/other writing mistakes, I apologize. I also have not written anything in a long, long time. Comments and criticisms are welcome.

(also emily's fbi timeline here might be a little confusing so idk lol)

AO3

Relationships don’t always work out. You have known that fact since you were seven years old as a result of your parents’ divorce. You still remember your mother saying, “Baby, sometimes love doesn’t last. Maybe it’s love for now but it won’t be love forever. Two people can grow apart even when they are together all the time. And that’s what happened with me and your dad. And honey, it’s not your fault, you understand?” And you still remember nodding as if you really understood what was happening.

But just like any other child who knew how it felt to be a product of a broken family, you still felt responsible about it. You could have done more, could have done something to prevent your family from falling apart, or at least could have done anything to stitch your family back together. But as you grow older, you learned that what if’s are only as good as heroin and cocaine combined together - it’s not. It’s lethal.

So even though your parents are still alive, you still considered them as the first ones you have lost. Accepting that has helped you cope with other things you have missed throughout your life..

Pen.

Hair ties.

Bus ticket.

Money.

Your first love.

The last one, unlike the others, was not forgotten, misplaced or stolen. The last one walked out of your life before you even had the chance to tell her you would move mountains and set the world on fire if she asked you to. What once were gentle, careful hands that held your heart are the same hands that crushed it into pieces and may have been impossible to glue it back together no matter how much you tried.

It’s fine though. It was a long time ago. You learned to live with it.

At least that’s what you told your therapist when she asked during one of your sessions.

“Come on, sugarplum.” Penelope Garcia, your roommate, tugged your arm. “It’s just drinks at the bar.”

“I’m already beat, Penny. I’ve had a long shift.”

“Exactly the reason why you need to get out and have fun, doctor. We were both so busy with work and never had fun anymore.”

“We have movie marathons sometimes.”

“Please,” Penelope scoffed. “You fall asleep in the first 30 minutes of every movie.”

You sighed. You didn’t defend yourself because it’s true. Lately, everything feels heavy. And you’re always exhausted to the point of passing out at any furniture you lay your head to.

“I’m sorry, Pen.”

Penelope cups your face and forces you to look at her. She has the most gentle, caring eyes when she wants it to be. Curious and determined, most of the time. “Hey, I’m not saying those aren’t fun, okay? I’m just saying maybe we need a change of environment. Get loose. Have a few drinks and maybe meet some people and dance. That’s all.”

“I don’t know these people,” you said defeatedly.

“And you don’t know your patients either but you’re forced to interact with them anyway.” Penelope squeezed your cheeks before letting go. “They’re my friends as much as you are mine, sweet cheeks. I’ll introduce you to them and who knows. You might end up liking them too.”

There’s no winning against your roommate. So you finally agreed and Penelope pranced to her room to change.

Since tonight seemed to be about changes, you decided to put on a skin tight knee-length blue dress that complimented your curves and skin along with a light denim blazer. You matched it with black printed flats and a purse Penelope gifted you last Christmas.

You and Penelope walked hand in hand to the bar. She told you briefly about everyone’s first names but you’re not sure if you will remember them all as you haven’t seen their faces just yet. Also, Penelope talks too fast when she’s excited and your brain just cannot process it as quickly knowing how tired you are.

You both stopped at the door, scanning the place and saw a booth on the far end of the bar. Penelope waved at the people on the table and everyone happily greeted Penelope. You felt a little at ease that they were all wearing casual clothes and looked a little less scary compared to what they actually do for a living.

“Everyone, this is my roommate, Y/N,” Penelope introduced you to the team. And pointing from left to right, she said, “This is Hotch, Derek, Reid and JJ.” They all waved at you. Reid stood up and shook your hand. He insisted you can call him Spencer and babbled something about an article he read the other day that he remembered because you’re wearing a blue dress. You stared at him, fascinated albeit confused. Derek chuckles and pulls Reid next to him.

“Hey, guys, here’s our dri-”

A pause.

A stare.

Your heart skipped a beat. Or two. Or maybe it stopped for God knows how long.

One of the glasses of beer almost fell out of the raven-haired woman’s hands. Luckily, JJ caught it, looking back and forth between the two of you.

“Emily, you are an angel.” Penelope snatched three glasses out of her friend’s hand. “Y/N, this is Emily.”

It took you a second - or ten - before you reached out your hand for a handshake and forced a smile. “Nice to meet you. I’m Y/N.” Your jaw started to hurt at how tight you’re clenching them but you can’t help it.

She’s here.

Emily took your hand and for a brief second, you felt her squeeze it harder than you would normally do for a handshake. “Emily,” was all she said and sat to Penelope’s right.

Everyone grabbed their drinks. The music at the bar grew loud and they talked even louder to understand each other. Derek and Reid debated about something work-related that you didn’t understand but Derek rolling his eyes at Reid whenever he stated facts amused you. Meanwhile, Penelope showed something to JJ and Emily on her phone and you just hope it’s not something embarrassing because you caught the glance JJ shoots at you and she giggled.

“What are you showing them, Pen?” you asked curiously.

“Nothing,” she grinned. “I’m just showing them how pretty my best friend is.”

You squint, not believing a word she just said. Your hands were quick to snatch the phone from her hand. “Penelope Garcia!” Even with the dim lighting, your blush was evident. It’s a photo of you sleeping in your kitchen, hugging a stainless pot and holding a wooden spatula. You don’t remember that happening. “When was this and why are you keeping this picture?”

Penelope laughed. “You don’t remember so I’m not going to remind you.”

You immediately deleted it off her phone. “Now it’s gone.”

She raised her eyebrows and let out a chuckle, “You forget I work in tech?”

You mumbled a curse and rolled your eyes, accepting defeat.

“Don’t worry, Y/N. It’s cute.” JJ teased and you could only force a smile in embarrassment.

Out of nowhere, Penelope gulped down her entire drink and stood. “Come on, let’s get dancing! Let’s go! Let’s go!”

Everyone followed her. Even Hotch who seems to not like the idea but Derek practically pushed him to the dance floor.

Everyone except Emily.

Her.

And you.

You two were left at the booth, sitting across from each other. Emily was gripping her glass. Hard. You believed she might break it if she didn't relax.

You averted your eyes from Emily. It’s ridiculous to not find anything to stare at other than Emily’s hands.

Emily’s beer.

Emily’s hair.

Emily’s clothes.

Emily’s necklace.

Why is this place full of her?

The place was full and crowded and the music was so loud but the silence between you two? That was louder. Deafening. Unsettling. Awkward.

“It’s nice to see you again,” Emily said, finally managing to look you in the eye again.

Your breath hitched once, twice, before answering, “You too.”

And you meant it. But you didn’t want to.

Oh, but you did.

She chugged her beer and grimaces the second she does. “I … I didn’t know you and Penelope are friends.”

“I didn’t know you and Penelope are co-workers either.” You shrugged. “How long have you been with the FBI?”

“Seven years,” she answered.

Penelope called your name from the dance floor where she was dancing with Morgan. You only gave her a thumbs up to let her know you’re fine and will be staying at the booth.

“You’re staring,” you said and Emily quickly diverted her eyes from you. She decided the floor was a better view instead. You licked your lips to keep yourself from smiling. “It’s okay, you know.”

“What?”

“I said it’s okay.”

“What’s okay?”

“If you want to pretend like we don’t know each other.” But the agonizing tug in your chest claimed otherwise. “I mean, they’re your friends and Pen is your friend as much as she’s mine. She doesn’t have to know. She just brought me here tonight so we could have fun and meet you guys.”

To your surprise, Emily moved to sit next to you. Not really next to you but just close enough to smell her perfume.

Velvety.

Delicious.

Familiar.

You inhaled deeply, composed yourself, and stole Penelope’s second beer.

“How have you been, Y/N?”

The shiver that ran down your spine shouldn’t be there when Emily said your name. It shouldn’t have affected you that much. Or at all. But it did. And you despised it.

“Since you left me? Great.” You laughed quietly, staring at the glass now half empty. “Really great. I … I’m well … a resident doctor …” You take a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I’m fine. I just …”

“You didn’t expect to see me, I get it.”

“Yeah.”

There’s the awkward silence again. If it doesn’t stop sooner, you think you might just bang your head against the table just to shift the mood.

“I tried to find you,” Emily spoke again. Her voice was low, you almost miss what she said. “I came back but you weren’t there anymore. Your mom said you already moved to LA with your dad and -”

“I don’t want to do this here, Emily. Please.” You just can’t. You might cause a scene if you keep this up. You’re still torn between crying hysterically or just downright screaming at her face.

But her face. Her stupid, fucking perfect face.

You looked away. You focused on the people dancing specifically at Penelope grinding against Reid who’s only swaying awkwardly. That’s better.

Emily scooted closer to you but not close enough to invade your personal space still. “Do you hate me?”

You wanted to be rude. Tell her what does it look like, bitch? But that’s just not you. You’re not a confrontational woman. You’re an honest woman. And to be honest, you’re feeling a lot.

Instead, you gulped a drink and stared at it for a while, leaving Emily staring at your hand, waiting for an answer that may never come.

It took a few minutes for you to gather the strength to look her in the eyes. Your eyes may have been teary, you’re not sure, but everything else looks blurry and you feel lightheaded. You’re not even drunk yet. You only had two beers, for fuck’s sake.

You missed those eyes. Emily’s kind, loving, gentle, ‘used to see right through you’ eyes.

“You left me,” was all that came out of your mouth.

Emily moved closer to your seat, dark eyes still locked on yours as if asking for permission. “I was scared. I was young, Y/N.”

You shook your head in disbelief. “And I wasn’t? Your mother literally hired a private investigator to threaten me so I would stay away from you! I was 17, Emily! 17!” You hissed. Emily tried to reach out for your hand but you got up quickly and ran to the dance floor, to your friend.

You whispered to Penelope’s ear that you needed to leave immediately to cover an emergency shift at the hospital. She knew better than to argue with you and your work so she let you go and told you not to worry about the tab. She offered to call you an uber but you insisted on walking since the hospital is only a few blocks away.

“Y/N, wait!”

“Emily, not now!” Your strides were getting bigger and you wished you could just fly home instead and get there faster. She grabbed your arm, pulling you to the side. And although it’s already dark outside, Emily can’t miss the way your eyes glisten with tears, staining your cheeks. “Please, Emily, just please.” You didn’t know what you’re actually asking - begging - her. You weakly placed a hand to her stomach and pushed to keep a little distance between the both of you.

Emily took your shivering hand and held it to her chest instead. Her hands were as soft as you remembered them to be. And you hated the fact that you still remember that after so many years. “Please, Y/N, let me just talk to you.”

“What’s there to talk about? We made it this far in life without each other.” You said bitterly.

“But we didn’t want to.” She sighed. “At least, not for me.”

You took a deep breath in. Emily wiped the tears with her thumbs. Then she cupped your face and you couldn’t help but to just feel her for a minute, face settling on her warm hands. You look at her, eyes pleading. “Em, please.”

Emily shuddered at the nickname. You were - are - the only one who could make it sound so soft and loved; make it sound like home. After all this time.

“Emily?” You both looked at the sound of Penelope’s voice. You quickly retracted your hand from Emily’s. “Y/N? You’re still here?”

“I, uh, Emily here just brought me my purse because I forgot.” You lied. Emily swallowed whatever she was about to say. You turned to Emily. “Thanks. I have to go now.”

“Oh, okay.”

You hailed a cab and got out as fast as you can, leaving Emily dumbfounded and Penelope confused as she was intrigued.

___

Emily rubbed her hands together and exhaled loudly. Penelope raised her eyebrow. “What did you do?” She asked.

“What? I didn’t do anything.”

“For an FBI agent, you’re a bad liar right now, honey.” She squinted and took a closer look at Emily’s eyes. Teary. “Were you two making out?”

Emily scoffed. “You’re drunk, Garcia.”

“And you’re hiding something, Prentiss.”

“I’m not!” Penelope continued to stare at her suspiciously, pressing the truth out of her. “Okay, I think you should talk to her first. I can’t be the one to tell you if she doesn’t want to.”

“Did you know Y/N before I brought her here? I saw that you two were surprised to see each other a while ago. There was something there. It doesn’t take a profiler to see it.”

Emily paced back and forth, biting her lip, arms crossed. She stopped herself from biting her nails, a habit she may have done when she’s anxious. Emily contemplated whether to tell Penelope everything or something or anything. “God, I think I need something stronger than the drinks in the bar.”

“I’m waiting here, pudding.”

“And I’m thinking here.” She kept her pace. Then stopped. Emily takes a deep breath. “Y/N is … well, she was … is … I think …” she rambled, hands in her pockets. Emily looked up to keep the tears pooling in her eyes from falling. “Garcia, she’s the love of my life.” She stated weakly.

Penelope gaped at Emily like a deer caught in headlights.

___

Penelope arrived home at around 2:30 in the morning. You heard the lock click and footsteps approaching your door. You quickly pulled the covers above your head and pretended to sleep soundly.

“Y/N?” It’s your roommate. She caressed your foot. “I just want to say I’m sorry for bringing you out there tonight. I … I didn’t know you and … her …” Penelope sighed sadly. “We can talk about it when you’re ready or whenever you want or not at all. It’s up to you really. I just want to say I’m sorry.” She gave a light pat to your leg. “Good night, sweetie.”

___

The next morning, you found Penelope sitting in the kitchen having coffee and talking to someone on her laptop. You didn’t interrupt her, suspecting she might be working from home.

You prepared coffee for yourself and sat on the opposite end of the table. You pretended to scroll on your phone … waiting …

“Morning, baby girl,” Penelope finally decided to break the silence.

“Morning, Pen.”

“So …” There it was. You have known her for a long time to know that nothing - not even the strongest of hangover - is stronger than her inquisitiveness. “Want to talk about the elephant in the room?”

You took a deep breath.

“I’m not forcing you, Y/N. I’m just asking if you’re ready because if you’re not, it’s fi -”

“And let you die of curiosity?” You hid your smirk behind your mug. Penelope smiled widely. “Did she tell you about me?”

“Emily?” You roll your eyes as if to say who else? “We haven’t had the chance to talk about our personal lives before but last night, she told me two things actually.”

“Oh?”

“One, that it might be better if I get the dirt from you. And two …” Penelope pauses, grinning. Is she actually pausing for dramatic effect?

“Spit it out, Penny.”

“I’m not sure if you want to know.”

“Just say it.”

“That you were -” Your friend shook her head. “ ARE. You are the love of her life.”

Oh.

There it was again. That tug in your chest. Are you dying? Maybe. You needed to get this checked out one of these days at the hospital, you thought. You might need an ECG or probably a 2D echo.

“Is it true?” Penelope pushed. “How did you two know each other?”

You walked to the living room with your coffee and sat on the couch. Penelope follows you.

“That love of her life part, I’m not sure.” You took a sip of your coffee. Black and bitter. “We met in high school. She was my girlfriend.”

Penelope scooted closer. “What happened?”

“Well, long story short -”

“No, I want the long complete detailed version, love bug.” You rolled your eyes at her and she smacked your arm. “You’ve been holding out on me!”

“Hey! I didn’t know my ex is working with you, okay?”

“Still! Everything really does happen for a reason.” She smiled to herself.

You raised an eyebrow. “And what’s the reason for this then?”

“We’ll see,” Penelope smirked. “Now, go on with the story, girlfriend.”

“We met in high school. She was a transferee. I was, well, an introvert with no friends. She was the new girl. I’m sure you know where I’m going with this.” You see Penelope with a shit-eating grin, nodding her head. “It took a week before I could say a word to her.”

“Because you’re so gay and she’s a pretty girl?” Penelope grinned.

You glared at her. “Because I was an introvert.”

“Sure.”

“Anyway, she missed a class and asked if she wanted my notes and she said yes. We have been friends from then on.”

“Until…?”

“She was the first one to say ‘I love you’, you know?” Tears started pooling in your eyes. You immediately wiped it off with the end of your sweater before it even stained your cheeks. “We were in the locker room. Just the two of us after gym class. It was out of nowhere. We just finished showering -”

“Together?” Penelope gasped scandalously. You swatted her arm and she laughed. “I’m kidding.”

“Anyway, we just finished showering and she said she loved me. You have to understand that it was a time when you know … it’s not accepted nor tolerated to be … us.” Penelope took your hand and squeezed it. She could only sympathize, knowing how cruel and tough the world must be to not let people love who they love. “We hid it for a year, maybe two. I’m really not sure now, I think, but it was the longest time of my life. We were okay, great even. We had the most fun, enjoying each other’s company, sneaking around, going on dates. My mom met her. She liked her. Always asked about her when I get home.” You smile at the memory now but it quickly fades. “Until her mother found out about us.”

“Ambassador Prentiss? Oh, that evil -”

“Her mother sent a P.I. to threaten me so I would stay away from her daughter. I was 17 years old and scared, what else can I do?”

“Oh, honey,” Your friend pulled you into a hug. “I’m sorry the world has not been kind to you, sunshine.”

“Thanks, Penny.”

“You two broke up after that?”

You shook your head. “I was about to ask Emily what we should do. I was ready to run away, to hide, to go anywhere with her. I messaged her to meet me at the gym locker room after class the next day but she never showed up at the school at all.” Penelope noticed your trembling hands and gently caressed them. “I found out from the faculty that she moved overseas.”

“Thank you for sharing this with me. I know it’s hard for you, honey bun.”

“I just didn’t expect to see her last night … or ever. I stopped myself from looking for her again. Turns out, life has funny comebacks.” You chuckled bitterly. Penelope enveloped you in a tight hug until her phone rings. You giggle, “Work is calling you, badass computer nerd.”

___

When Penelope reached the BAU, Emily was the first one to spot her. She ran towards her, following Penelope to her office.

“Fabulous morning, person who hurt my roommate.” Penelope greeted without looking at Emily to which she replied with an eye roll. “Y/N told me everything.”

“Y/N told you everything about what?” Suddenly the two women stopped on their tracks and turned around. It’s JJ with take-out coffees in one hand and files on the other. “Come on, ladies. Share it with the team.”

“No!” They simultaneously yelled.

“Okay, chill.” JJ handed them each their coffees. “Share it with me. I’ll find out about it anyway.”

Penelope dragged the two women into her lair. Once locked inside, Penelope announced, “Y/N is your ex!”

“Garcia!” Emily hushed her.

JJ’s eyes were wide and almost spitted out her coffee. “I knew there was something!”

“What?” Emily looked genuinely confused.

“Emily, we’re profilers. We see everything.” JJ reminded her. “You were so awkward with her last night. I assume you guys haven’t seen each other in a while.”

“15 years.”

“And it’s still that awkward?” JJ scoffed unbelievably. “Must have been a bad break up.”

“Technically, they didn’t break up but Agent Prentiss here left my friend without saying goodbye.” Penelope squinted her eyes at Emily, arms folded and eyebrows raised.

Emily’s face was almost as red as her blouse now. “I didn’t … I didn’t want to.”

“Then why did you?”

“It’s com-”

A knock interrupted the ladies’ gossip session. “Ladies, Hotch wants us in the briefing room ASAP.” Morgan told them.

“Be right there!” JJ replied. “We’ll continue this later. Over drinks. Just the three of us. Ladies’ night.”

Emily saw no way out of this so she just nodded.

___

It was a terribly bad day at work. The ER was filled with too many people. Patients kept on coming without showing signs of slowing down. Every bed was occupied - some were already in the hallway in wheelchairs - and everyone had something to do. You have not had breakfast or lunch yet. Your cup of coffee left cold at the doctor’s quarters which you’re sure someone threw out already.

Sometimes you wonder why you chose this career instead of just pursuing your love for multimedia arts.

“Doc,” a senior nurse called you. “I have your patient’s labs and ECG right here.” She hands you the chart. “X-ray results are to follow. Let me know if you’ll be requesting more. Bed 5.”

“Okay.” You walked towards the bed, reviewing your patient's chart. Name … age …

Name?

Now the world was playing a prank on you.

“Emily Prentiss?” You call your patient’s name as soon as you draw the curtains. Emily looked up to you, lying on the bed, beaming too much for someone who’s injured. There’s a small stain of blood on her tank top. You felt something stuck in your throat as worry fills your thoughts yet you retain your poker face.

“Y/N?”

“Dr. Y/F/N, resident. I’m,” you cleared your throat. You put down the chart on the bedside table. “I’m here to examine you. Can you tell me what happened?”

Emily adjusted herself on the bed with a grimace. “I got shot. Almost. I was wearing a vest but I think it left a graze.” Emily lifted her top to show you. You don your gloves and inspect the wound closely, pressing softly at the area. You suspect she might have taken more than one close hit from the way the graze looked. Your eyes panned to her eyes staring at your hands.

“Did you get hit elsewhere, Agent?”

“No,” Emily shook her head. But your eyes found fresh bruises on both of her arms. “It’s fine, doesn’t hurt.”

“You’re always a tough cookie, agent?”

“I have to be.”

“Of course.” You assessed the rest of her body, especially her head for any bumps or cuts. Apart from the bullet graze on her chest and the bruises on her arms, you didn’t find anything else worthy of concern or emergency so far. “Do you feel anything else? Any pain?”

Emily had many answers to that but she bit her tongue. It’s not the time and place. She shook her head instead.

“Okay, I’ll get someone to clean and dress your wound. I’ll order an intravenous painkiller. It will take care of the first six hours, at least, but I’ll also prescribe you some oral painkillers and have your home care instructions ready. Do you have someone I can talk to?”

“I, uh, I think JJ is around somewhere. Or Reid.”

“Any relatives?”

“They’re all I have.” There was a small pause. “We take care of each other.”

“Yeah, of course. Part of the job.” You wrote your initial reports on her chart before leaving. “So, uh … I’ll call the nurse.” You turned around but Emily grabbed the end of your coat. “Anything else, Agent Prentiss?”

“Can you, if it’s not too much to ask, can you do the IV thing? I just …”

“You hate needles.” I know.

She nodded. “Please?”

Fuck. How can you say no when she’s looking at you with those eyes? Dark, pleading and consuming.

You can lie and tell her you have other patients to attend to but so far, no nurse had called you yet. You hear another resident had come in, too.

Emily’s eyes and hand were still on you.

“Okay,” you finally said. “I’ll be right back.”

Just your dumb, stupid luck.

___

Your shift ended at around 10pm but it’s almost midnight when you got out of the hospital. You already changed your top into a purple t-shirt. You carried your bags, coat hanging on your arm, as you walked to your car. You couldn’t wait to go home and wash off the busy day you had.

You stopped by to take out Chinese food for you and Penelope and a little extra to reheat tomorrow for breakfast.

You heard the TV as you approached the door. Penelope must still be awake and watching a show. You opened the door with your keys and to your surprise, one of your patients today was sitting on your couch. Your eyes met briefly.

“Hey, sweetie pie!” Penelope cornered you and grabbed hold of the take-outs. “Let me talk to you for a minute.” Penelope excused herself and you, dragging you to the kitchen. “I’m sorry Emily’s here but somebody’s got to take care of her and she lives alone. I figured since you’re here and you’re a doctor, this will be the safest choice. If that’s alright with you, of course.”

“Do I really have a choice?”

“No.” Your roommate grinned widely.

You let out an exasperated sigh. “Then it’s fine. I’m going to my room. I had a long day.”

“But aren’t you going to eat? You can watch TV with us.”

“I lost my appetite.” You mumbled. You walked to your room and Emily caught you on the way. She stopped in front of you. “What?”

“I’m sorry for staying. The team insisted and -”

“It’s fine, Agent Prentiss.”

Emily frowned. “You don’t have to be so formal.”

“I’m sorry but I’m really tired. I just want to go to bed.”

“Okay, sorry,” She stepped to the side and you walked past her. “Y/N?” You looked back at her. “Thank you for today.”

You flashed her a small smile.

___

You woke up the next morning to a loud scream. You quickly got up and ran to the living room. Your hair still disheveled and pajama pants hanging a little low.

“Is there a fire?” You asked, confused and half awake.

“Sorry for waking you, sunshine. But I cannot do this.” Penelope handed you a gauze, medical tape and scissors. “Help us, oh sweet lord of ER.”

You yawned then sat next to Emily. You disinfected your hands with alcohol and proceeded to clean her wound with povidone-iodine. She winces a little. “Hurts?”

“A little.”

“Well, it’s supposed to.”

“Wow, aren’t you grumpy in the morning.” Emily teased, earning a glare from you and a slightly painful poke. “Ow! Hey, be gentle please. I’m already hurt.” She pouted.

“You have a dangerous job. Couldn’t you be more careful?” You retorted, annoyed.

“Well, I’m sorry the UnSub has a gun and tried to kill me.”

You ignored her mumbling. “Do you have the day off?”

“Hotch gave me the week off.” Emily answered, clearly disappointed. “I can’t believe my doctor suggested a week's rest. It’s not even that bad, right?”

You bit the inside of your cheeks. “And you know better than your doctor?”

Emily smiled. “I guess not.”

You finished cleaning up her wound and changing the dressing. You picked up an ice pack from the fridge and handed it to her. “Ice your bruises. No more than 15 minutes at a time.”

“Yes, doc.”

“Don’t call me doc.”

“You’re a doctor.”

“We’re not in the hospital.”

Emily leaned forward, a little too close to your face. ��What should I call you then?”

Up close, you noticed her lower lip has a small cut while her upper lip … well, there’s nothing wrong with it.

You tried not to focus too much on her lips. Tried is the keyword.

Then, you suddenly felt like your ghost floated above you and gave the back of your head a cold hard slap. Your eyes quickly darted up to her own brown orbs, intently staring back at you.

“I’d rather you not call me anything at all.” You said firmly and got up. Emily watched you march back to your room. A small smirk formed on Emily’s face.

You lied on your bed. Heart pounding, head somewhat dizzy, cheeks flushed.

Fuck Emily Prentiss and her stupid, stupid, tempting lips.

___

The three of you ended up watching your second classic film one afternoon with Penelope sitting between you and Emily. You didn’t like the movie that much honestly. You walked to the kitchen to make yourself your favorite drink - soda with vanilla ice cream.

“You still like that huh?” Emily sneaked up behind you. “It’s diabetes in a glass.”

“Guilty.” You took a sip. “It’s my comfort drink.”

“It sure is.”

“What do you need? Ice?”

“You, actually.”

“Why? Something hurts?”

“Nothing you can heal.”

You rolled your eyes. “I’m serious.”

“So am I, Y/N.” Emily stepped closer to you. “I was wondering if we can finally have a talk.”

“We’re watching a movie.”

“Penelope’s just fine.” You both glanced at Penelope who turned her head back to the TV at breakneck speed.

“She put you up to this huh?” You took a seat and you gestured to Emily to do the same. There’s no use avoiding ‘the talk’ anyway as it looks like Emily might live here for the whole week whether you liked it or not. “What do you want to talk about?”

“Us.”

“Us?”

Emily ran her hands through her hair, not knowing where to start. “I didn’t want to leave.”

Fifteen years.

It’s been fifteen years since you last saw Emily. Both of you were still kids - young, innocent, carefree, hopeful. The day Emily left your life, you were a wreck. You did good at school, acing exams after exams, and eventually got to medical school on partial scholarship. Outside, you tried to be the perfect little golden daughter your parents and teachers expected you to be. Inside? You were empty. You felt as if you’re a shallow case of a person.

The first five years since Emily left, you graduated from high school. You got multiple part time jobs before applying to universities. In between those busy times, you tried to find her - called her up on her phone every single day for three years, wrote letters to her last known address every month for two years. Once, you even tried to sneak into their house but the security guard spotted you and almost caught you. You almost had a bald spot from the security grabbing your hair.

By the sixth year since Emily had gone, you stopped. You realized it’s not healthy anymore. You were holding on to a ghost. So you learned to live the next years of your life without her. After finishing your degree in biochemistry, you moved to LA with your father. You got yourself into UCLA and pursued medicine.

The med school journey wasn’t a smooth ride at all. Yes, you didn’t fail one subject during med school but the harder part came later - the actual practice. You struggled with a lot of things but mostly socializing with different people - strangers - whose life depended on you and your capabilities.

It was only five years ago that you finally started to feel somewhat confident with yourself. Not perfect but you weren’t getting yelled at as much by the attendings anymore. A senior resident even complimented your improvement which meant a lot to you.

Long story short, you survived without her.

Her name had become a memory pushed and tucked away in the back of your mind. You locked it and threw away the key. You had stopped yourself from waiting for answers as to why she walked out on you or why she didn’t fight for you ages ago.

Well.

Until now.

“Y/N,” Emily placed her hand on top of yours and you were quick to retract it. It was a reflex at this point. “Sorry.” She kept her hands under the table. “I know apologizing won’t erase anything that happened to us but I’m really sorry, love.”

“Don’t call me that.” You clenched your jaw. “Just tell me why.”

“She, my mother … she took me to the Middle East when she found out about us. I should have known, I should have seen, that we were being followed by her men every time we went out. She tossed the photos - our photos - to my face. She called me disgusting and immoral and a fucking disappointment all because I loved you.” The last part came out as a mumble but you caught it.

Your eyebrows relaxed, eyes softened. The waterworks in your eyes were threatening to fall again. Damn it.

How would a 17-year-old expect this from her own mother? How was she supposed to know?

“She had all your information and your family’s and I was so afraid that she would come for you.” Emily continued, now looking down at her hands, trembling in fear and probably embarrassment of being vulnerable and open. “I knew she would come for you. She told me so. I will set that girl straight if that’s what it takes, that’s what she said. And you have no idea how that sentence scarred me until now.” Emily takes a deep shuddering breath. “The thought of you being hurt because of me … us … I couldn’t bear that, Y/N. I had to protect you so I made her swear to leave you alone and in exchange I will follow whatever she wanted me to do, whatever she wanted me to be.” Emily glanced back up to you, eyes defenseless and face flushed. “I just want you alive and safe.”

“Emily …”

“You don’t have to forgive me now or ever if you don’t want to. Or if you can’t. That’s okay. I can live with that … I think.” Your ex-girlfriend sat up straight, faked a smile. “But I want you to know that when I got to the Bureau, I did look for you.”

Your eyes met. And from what Penelope was seeing from the living room, everything was evident: the longing, the pain, the memories.

“I found out you got into med school in LA. I was so happy for you, you know that. I knew you would make it. I remember you wanted to be a surgeon at first but then you said you liked kids so maybe pedia -”

“Why didn’t you call?”

“I couldn’t … I wanted to, Y/N. I have wanted so badly for years. But when I remember about what I put you through, what my mother put you -”

“Us,” you corrected. “What your mother put us through.”

Emily nodded. “I just couldn’t ruin your life like that again.”

“Do you still talk to her? Your mother.”

“Not anymore. We haven’t been in contact since the last case she brought to the FBI.”

“Do you miss her?”

“Can’t miss someone you don’t know.”

You gave her a sad smile. “You’re strong, Emily.”

“Sometimes I think it’s a curse.”

“It will take some time,” you mumbled. Emily stared at you, waiting for what you meant. “Forgiving you, I mean.”

“I know. You don’t have to.”

“But I understand, Emily. I understand now.”

You shared a friendly smile. You leaned forward to wipe the tear from Emily’s cheek.

Emily held your wrist, feeling your hand on her cheek. You two stayed like that for a few seconds. You were the first one to let go but before going, you left a tender kiss on her forehead to which Emily closed her eyes, feeling your lips against her skin for the first time in a long time.

The moment was almost ruined when you and Emily heard a shriek from the living room and saw Penelope stuffing her mouth with ice cream. Clearly, she saw everything.

You and Emily chuckled.

“Em,” you softly whispered. “I’m sorry too.”

“You have nothing to apologize for.”

“Sorry the world wasn’t kind. To you. To us.”

Emily frowned. “It’s not your fault.”

None of this was your fault or Emily’s as it turns out. Now that everything was out in the open, a blossoming hope grew in your heart as you looked at Emily. All the sadness, anger and pain you felt the first time you laid eyes on her at the bar, you felt that diffusing quickly.

Maybe it’s not such a bad idea.

To just kiss her. Just once. Again.

Or hug her.

You don’t know. All you know is that you missed her. And although she looked much older than you remembered her to be - so are you - you still remembered looking at her eyes all those years ago. At the locker room. During classes. At the carnival. At the mall. In your childhood room. The street two blocks away from her house.

Emily stood up, eye level with yours, as if she read your mind. She leaned forward. Your lips now close to hers that you can feel her take a breath. She waited for you to pull away or to ran to your room but you didn’t. The next thing you know was Emily closing the gap between both of your lips.

The kiss was soft. Like the first time when you were two young girls at the locker room the first time she told you that she loves you. Yet, it was also intoxicating, exciting. You felt a jolt of electricity running through your whole body.

The kiss was also quick. It was done before you know it.

Emily flashed a smile. “I’d like to do that again.”

“Me too,” You mentally kicked yourself at how quick you responded to that.

“Let me take you out on a date sometime.”

How can you say no to her?

The answer is you don’t.

“I’d like that, Em.”

“Friday? 10pm? I’ll pick you up?”

“It’s like you know my work schedule.”

“Lucky guess,” Emily smirked. “Let’s go before Penelope dies of excitement. She’s literally red and might combust.”

“Don’t worry, I’m here if she codes.” You share a laugh.

You couldn’t wait for Friday to come.

#emily prentiss x reader #emily prentiss x y/n #emily prentiss x you #emily prentiss angst #emily prentiss fic #emily prentiss #paget brewster x reader #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds fic #criminal minds angst #jaye writes #emily prentiss x female reader

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lu-dao-writes · 3 months

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— 𝐀 𝐁𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐎𝐟 𝐋𝐢𝐟𝐞 (𝘼𝙡𝙥𝙝𝙖!𝘾𝙝𝙤𝙨𝙤 𝙆𝙖𝙢𝙤)

꒰ྀི ᥫ᭡ 𝙎𝙮𝙣𝙤𝙥𝙨𝙞𝙨 Despite being semi aware of his and his siblings existence, that’s all he knows. Choso not only has to navigate being fully alive, but he has to understand his role as the older brother, and understand his role as an alpha.

𝙒𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜(𝙨) Omegaverse/ABO dynamics, SPOILERS, scenting, nesting, Kenjaku and him being a questionable dad, Mahito being… himself really, mentions of sex/ heats and ruts, mentions of porn watching, gn!reader, reader is Gojo’s sibling (you decide if biological or not), reader’s dynamic is not specified but hinted you’re either an alpha or omega, angst, bittersweet ending, vague threat alluding to sa not made by Choso but Kenjaku, grief.

𝘼/𝙉 It’s finally here (on my tumblr anyway lol)! This is more of a character study for Choso that I wanted to do, and because I also wanted to do an omegaverse piece. Reader and Choso interact later down the line, and the last bit is just the Reader’s perspective. Not too confident with the last bit but I’m ready to be done lol. Idk if I should have the minors dni warning cause there’s nothing super explicit here, but I’d say this is probably for a mature audience? I’ll be lenient but I’d rather not see a 13 year old like this🤣. But I hope y’all enjoy this! Also thank you for your patience!𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒ ꒱ྀི

꒰ྀི𝙒𝘾: 5,232 ꒱ྀི

꒰ྀི 𝙏𝙖𝙜(𝙨) 🏷️ ꒱ྀི @staygoldsquatchling02

THE first breath of life is usually a special, momentous moment.

Sometimes it’s the start of a miserable existence where a soul must struggle before finding the sweet taste of… Whatever it is.

But for Chōsō, it’s more disorienting than anything, and the main thing on his mind is his family.

Chōsō and the rest of his siblings have been aware of each other, almost as if they’re connected by a mind link, but there’s no words to be said nor heard. It’s just a faint thrumming, almost like the thin strands of a spider's web being plucked.

The death painting cared not for anything else outside of his siblings.

That is until he had to when he took his first official breath.

Chōsō awakens to two people in front of him; two men with various smiles plastered on their faces. One a mild smile with slight interest in his eyes with ink black hair cascaded down past his shoulders, a scar across his forehead and dressed in some traditional getup.

And the other has giddy, dual colored eyes seemingly bright with.. Something that makes him feel a bit uncomfortable. He’s got dull blue hair and stitches in various spots on his body.

After briefly studying their appearance, scents infiltrate his nose. A wave of multiple things and so overwhelmingly strong that it makes his skin itch and belly clench.

On one hand there’s a mix of spicy, and smoky with hints of sweetness, and on the other hand it’s sour and bittersweet.

Chōsō covers his nose before becoming slightly infatuated with his new appendage. Too pale skin with a few bulging veins. He wiggles his fingers before a voice finally speaks up.

“You’re finally awake, Chōsō,” the dark haired man speaks, his voice giving Chōsō the feeling like something creeps up his spine, but he’s not sure if it’s a pleasant feeling or something dreadful.

Chōsō blinks at him cluelessly, purple eyes mirroring each other as they look at one another, but eventually Chōsō can see a hint of delight in the others eyes, but his face remains composed.

The man with the stitches giggles, the sound being higher pitched compared to the ink haired man.

Chōsō looks at the other with a bit of confusion.

“Ignore him, but I’ll cut to the chase. Your name is Chōsō and you are the oldest of 9 siblings.”

Chōsō finds himself nodding, being aware of this knowledge, but he does not interrupt him.

“Behind you are Esō and Kechizu.”

Chōsō whips his head around, his heart swelling as he watches the vessels slowly morph until they’re at their final shape.

His beloved younger brothers…

The reasons for him to strive to be the best role model and pave the right path for them and them alone, no matter the mistakes he’s bound to make.

His responsibility…

“You are responsible for them and each other,” the man continued from behind him.

The man with dual colored eyes wanders closer, crouching down near Esō and Kechizu. He reaches out and pokes at them carelessly, the action infuriating Chōsō to a high degree. He acts before he could comprehend what he's doing, his hand smacking the other’s away and a rancorous snarl spilling from within his throat, startling himself. His eyes are wide and he touches his throat, the pad of his middle, ring, and index fingers pressing at his Adam’s apple.

The man that was prodding at his brothers only cackles. “Oh, he didn’t like that!”

“Mahito, I suggest not testing him too much. He’s an alpha that doesn’t know how to control himself, and I certainly won’t help if you get hurt because you couldn’t stop running your mouth,” the other man warns, not sounding concerned in the slightest.

The unserious man, Mahito, scoffs. “Oh please, Getō, I’m not scared of some untrained alpha mutt.”

Chōsō is left even more confused, but he’s not insulted, instead he focuses on hovering over his brothers, not wanting Mahito to touch them again.

Now that he’s more present, he can tell who’s smell is who. Mahito’s is the one that smells sour and bittersweet, while Getō is the smoky, sweet and spicy one. It’s still overwhelming to smell them both, the urge to snap at both of them was strong, but he was not going to break composure again unless necessary.

Esō and Kechizu’s scents were slowly coming to life, their scents not being bothersome to Chōsō.

Esō smells faintly of something soft, floral, and sweet, but underneath that it’s death.

And Kechizu’s scent is earthy, metallic, and also smells of death underneath it all, but his scent is not as strong as everyone else’s.

They’re perfect in his eyes.

Chōsō holds their hands as they wake up, his gaze almost blank but there’s a touch of softness there in those dark purple eyes of his.

“Hello younger brothers,” he greets, his voice dull while his hands hold theirs tenderly.

“You’re Esō,” he directs to his brother who looks like an unearthly human.

He then looks to his other brother who looks less human. “And you’re Kechizu.”

Esō and Kechizu smile at him and wrap their arms around him, their scents meshing together and onto each other’s skin like a semi permanent tattoo.

Seeing their smile, and feeling their warmth… Chōsō wants to make sure he keeps them safe and happy.

Mahito scoffs and Chōsō is alerted.

“Chōsō is the only one that looks good. How come the other two look so gross?”

Another cord of uncontrollable anger surges through him, but he restrains himself enough that only a small growl leaves his throat, purple eyes glaring pins and needles into Mahito who looks like he couldn’t care less.

Esō’s scent suddenly grows foul, permeating through the room and alerting everyone.

It further pisses Chōsō off but before he could lose the little amount of control he has, Getō cuts in calmly.

“Where are my manners? I’m Getō Suguru, and I’m sure you heard me address him as Mahito. Before we let the three settle in I have more to discuss with you.”

Chōsō noticed while Getō was talking that he had a way to command his attention even though Chōsō was far more focused on making sure his brothers were okay, especially Esō.

Getō goes on to talk about his plans for the world and wants them to join in his cause. Chōsō frankly does not care, as long as he and his siblings can live peacefully in this “new world”.

“We’ll join under one condition,” Chōsō declared once Getō was finished with his speech.

Said man’s smile grows an inch. “Go on and name your condition.”

Chōsō speaks firmly, never once wavering as he and Getō stare each other in the eyes. “As long as my brothers, as well as our other siblings, can live peacefully in the end of all of this, we’ll cooperate.”

Getō looks like he expected nothing less from the ill looking man. “I don’t see anything wrong with that.”

Seeming that it seems to be a deal, he nods before speaking again. “Now then, what is with you calling me an alpha?”

“Ah yes! I will give you books on your biologies and as well as get you and Esō the proper medications you’ll need.”

Mahito gags, toying with his hair. “Those pesky suppressants. Who even needs those when they end up becoming a problem later?”

Chōsō’s eyes fly open with alarm, his purple orbs darting over to Getō and narrowing slightly, silently demanding an explanation.

Getō waves off his gaze, still having that carefree expression of his. “That’s years and years down the line.” Then he suddenly pins Chōsō with a knowing stare, looking a little arrogant now. “Esō is an omega and without them he could get hurt. You wouldn’t want that now would you?”

Chōsō swallows and only gives him a stiff nod, the terms still lost on him, but if the medication can keep Esō stable for now, that’s all he needs to know. He’ll figure out another solution later when he’s more knowledgeable.

Getō then guides the three beings into a room and inside there’s a large bed, small wooden desks beside the bed, light fixtures, a tv, empty bookshelf, a standing mirror, and a fuzzy couch. On the bed there’s a pile of random articles of clothing and some shoes that the siblings wander over to.

“This will be your living space, when you’re able to go outside feel free to buy anything to liven the place up more,” Getō advises, remaining at the doorway. “I’ll let you three get dressed and I’ll be back shortly.”

The siblings don’t acknowledge him, focused on finding the right pieces of clothing for themselves.

And Chōsō finally runs into his first problem as an older brother. When Esō was trying his first set of clothes on, he was absolutely horrified when he saw what was on his back. His scent soured and stunk up the room, drowning Chōsō and Kechizu.

Esō moves away from the standing mirror, keeping his back away from his brothers, his eyes slightly welling up. “I look disgusting!” he gasps, a million thoughts and scenarios passing through his eyes and it makes Chōsō panic and clam up. He wants to help him immediately, but when he takes a step towards him, he’s lost on what to even say.

“Esō don’t be so harsh on yourself. Kechizu nor I even batted an eye on what’s on your back. You’re not disgusting,” Chōsō explains to him, his voice blunt but with a twinge of gentleness.

Esō's expression softens but he looks off to the side, his attention elsewhere again. He shakes his head and moves to the pile of clothes again. “Please.. Don’t look at my back.”

“But-.”

“I don’t want to talk about this anymore. Please, Ani…”

Chōsō wants to push, but hearing the pleading in Esō’s voice makes him reluctantly sigh and let it go. He only wants to make his brothers happy, and if Esō doesn’t want to talk about it, fine. He’ll have to trust that whenever Esō’s ready he’ll come talk to him.

“I don’t think I want to wear any of these,” Kechizu chimes in before the silence could swallow them. “It’s not like I’ll be able to walk out in public anyways,” he adds with a shrug and tossing the shirt in his hand, not having a care in the world about that fact.

Chōsō hopes that Kechizu keeps that attitude because he doesn’t even know how to help Esō with his current situation.

“That’s fine,” Chōsō murmurs, admiring some boots that were on the bed.

Once dressed to their liking, Esō’s smell had gradually turned back to normal, easing the other two.

“Are you both comfortable?” Chōsō checks in.

“We’re fine!” Esō replies while Kechizu nods with a smile. “Are you?”

Chōsō nods with a hum. “I want you both to have the bed. The couch will be fine with me.”

They tried to argue and insist that he could also take the bed with them, but Chōsō insisted that he already took a liking to the couch anyways. Since the younger siblings knew there was no way to change Chōsō’s mind, they give up, settling down onto the bed.

“What do you think of all of this?” Esō eventually asks.

“All I care about is my family,” Chōsō answers without hesitation. “We live for each other, and as your older brother I’ll do my best to keep you both happy and safe.”

‘I will set a good example for them like I’m meant to. Even if I stumble along the way..’

“And we’ll keep you safe and happy!” Kechizu declares with Esō nodding with his arms crossed.

“That won’t be necessary but I appreciate it,” he says softly, lips curling up slightly. “Your happiness makes me happy.”

Suddenly there’s a knock at the door before it opens, revealing Getō with books and a bag of medicine in hand like he promised. “Here you all go,” he says, handing them off to Chōsō.

Chōsō stares at the book that was on top: “Alpha Biology 101 For Dummies.”

“Whenever you three are ready the rest of us will be out here,” he says before gliding away once more.

As Chōsō learns to grasp what life is now for him and his brothers, he soon learns the meaning of what are alphas, betas, and omegas.

Kechizu is a beta. People with this dynamic don’t have to take suppressants like alphas and omega have to to regulate sexual urges. Their scent is not as overpowering, and… Well… In simple terms they’re basic.

Not his words.

Now onto omegas. Omegas were highly sought after, spoken of like they’re prized treasures. They have heats that occur and are said to be “submissive” and the “caregivers” of society. Lot of the texts in the books he was given speak of omegas being frail and are made to be infantilized. It was weird, and it made him feel dread in the pit of his gut as he thought of either of his brothers being treated that way.

Chōsō was conflicted about what was being told to him from the books, and his own analysis from being around his brothers, Mahito, and omegas outside the hideout.

Mahito and Esō were not submissive. While Esō is sensitive that does not mean that he’s submissive. He’s clever and likes to dominate the room and anyone that tries to walk over him. Just as long as no one speaks or gazes upon the face on his back he’s fine.

Mahito… He’s playful, sadistic, and dominates the room, especially those he considers inferior. He’s anything but fragile and doesn’t need protection. The world is his playground and he doesn’t care who gets hurt or what gets broken by him.

Chōsō knows there’s not a caring bone in his body.

If anything.. Kechizu, despite being a beta, had what the textbook would describe as “omegan behavior”…

Even while he people watched he could see that what was said in the textbook was so… Wrong. Outdated.

It all just seems to be one big insult to omegas while only slightly uplifting them.

But Chōsō takes the basics so that he’s got a foot to stand on when taking care of Esō's and his omegan needs. And of course he made mistakes along the way, and at first he’s hard on himself when it comes to forgiveness.

Esō likes to nest with minimalistic things, even though he’s somewhat forced too since the brothers don’t have much to begin with. Esō also isn’t a perfectionist when it comes to his nest. He just wants one or two items that belong to his brothers and somewhere comfortable. He’s not big on constant need of physical touch, something he snapped at Chōsō for when he tried to coddle him a little too much. He does however like to wear bracelets that have Chōsō and Kechizu’s scent on them. It’s something he never likes to take off unless they need to be rescented. Those bracelets keep him happy just as much as being in his brother’s presence.

But finally onto alphas…

Alphas seemingly have too much power. They’re viewed as dominant, aggressive, and almost as gods, and the superior beings of the world. Like omegas they have heats, but they’re called ruts.

But once again, Chōsō goes off what he sees amongst Getō, Jōgo, himself, and people outside.

Chōsō has yet to really lose his senses, unless it comes to his family. But he’s not possessive of anything, outwardly aggressive, and he doesn’t even look like a typical alpha, something Jōgo mumbled about once with Mahito also agreeing halfheartedly.

Chōsō also doesn’t bother to assert himself when it comes to Jōgo or Getō.

Jōgo every now and then tries it, but Getō asserts himself elegantly without doing much effort, and he mocks Jōgo when he fails.

There’s also a big aspect on sexual urges and he himself hasn’t crossed that path and neither has his brothers.

Even when he accidentally walked in on Mahito cackling about the porn he was watching- although the obscene noises startled him- it overall did nothing to him.

Briefly he does wonder if something is wrong with him, but in the end he doesn’t care enough. He appreciates that he doesn’t have to deal with it because it’ll just get in his way.

Chōsō believes he has a decent understanding of all the dynamics, but he has no interest in telling anyone how they should behave. It’s not his place and he sees no point in it.

People watching has helped, but soon it starts to take a toll on him. Looking at the humans… He has no hatred towards them, but looking at them constantly reminds him how his other siblings will not be welcomed. Only he can walk around without much problem, and that sucks.

So eventually he stops going out so much, keeping himself at the hideout and leaving only when necessary.

He just hopes that following Getō’s plans doesn't come to bite him in the ass later…

But unfortunately the universe isn’t so kind to him. While playing a silly little board game with the other residents, Chōsō feels like his heart was being gripped so tight while simultaneously being slowly torn apart and beating rapidly, his mind flashing with images. He ignores Mahito’s whining and barely even moved to respond to Getō when he asked if he was okay.

“Both… Both of my brothers just died,” he says, his voice heavy. His scent is sour and oozing from him, causing Mahito to complain more before he’s distracted by something Getō says.

Chōsō breaks through the static when he feels Getō’s hand on his shoulder, gazing at him with a slight look of sympathy. The game board was already cleared up and everyone else was gone, leaving them alone.

“Let’s go retrieve their bodies,” Getō orders lightly.

Chōsō blinks at him, a little stunned he’s willing to even do that for him. He just nods, his throat thick with saliva. Or maybe it’s bile.

As they walk together Getō never once walks ahead, just remains at Chōsō’s side. His scent wraps around him as if to comfort him, and he still doesn’t know what to make of it, but it does keep him grounded and… It feels nice.

But surely he’s not trying to act like a father to him. Getō’s not soft either.

Chōsō pushes it aside for now the moment he sees his dead brothers laid up next to one another. That’s when the tears suddenly came.

Tears continuously drip down his pale cheeks, never ceasing even as he tries to swipe them away. He falls to his knees and hugs their bloodied bodies into him, sobbing and begging for their forgiveness for not being there and saving them.

He felt their fear and it was sickening. He felt everything up until they took their last breaths.

Chōsō whimpers that he’ll avenge them. He’ll slaughter Yūji Itadori and Nobara Kugisaki for what they’ve done.

Getō watches with a soft expression, his lips quirked just slightly with wicked twinkle in his eyes. He reaches over to lightly ruffle Chōsō’s head, comforting him and letting him grieve.

After properly burying his brothers, Chōsō started caring less and less about the plain, the only thing truly fueling him being revenge.

So during the fight with Gojō Satoru in the Shibuya subway he hardly put much effort into it, letting Jōgo and Hanami take the lead and do the heavy lifting.

From Getō, Chōsō has been made aware just how strong he is, and Chōsō has no wish to die by his hands. His quarrel is not with him and he doesn’t want Gojō to be in his way.

Especially not when he’s so close to his brothers’ killers.

Just when Chōsō can find himself falling asleep due to sheer boredom and from his legitimate lack of sleep, a sudden scent wafts in the air and punches him straight in the lungs, his pupils slowly widening. There’s a sudden electricity running through his veins and he’s become alert, head swiveling around.

It’s a scent so alluring and it floats around the subway, slowly becoming stronger, and standing out amongst the gore and sour rot. It comes closer until his head is snapped to the side, a foot quite literally snapping him out of it.

Chōsō grunts as he crashes to the ground, and when he looks at his attacker he’s once again stupefied.

“This right here is Gojō Satoru’s sibling. A special grade just like him. Do be careful if you happen to cross paths,” Getō warns before slipping the photo back into his pocket.

Chōsō only grunts, his disinterested eyes moving off to the side.

The air around them is almost electric and soon enough the light overhead bursts, but neither flinch.

Chōsō assumes it’s the youngest Gojō’s technique, but he’s not certain, nor does he dwell on it for long, his brain becoming inebriated from the scent.

Neither move and the once fierce expression on the other’s face slowly morphs into one of trepidation, scent souring and causing him such great discomfort that he lets out a timorous whine he couldn’t withhold.

Chōsō’s skin suddenly becomes hot, tingling all throughout his limbs, and something stirs to life deep within himself.

Those pretty eyes still have him locked in place before they’re gone within a blink of an eye.

“Satoru!”

The ever thinning bit of control he has is snapping thread by thread, and he’s down to the last few strings.

“Y/N, for once just listen to me and get the hell out of here! Go warn the others, I’ll be fine!”

Dark purple eyes watch as Gojō Y/N struggles for a moment before unwillingly turning tail to leave the scene, effortlessly blasting away any trouble that stood in the way. Chōsō was surprised that Getō even allowed it to happen.

But that’s beside the point. The moment the younger Gojō disappeared, Chōsō felt like everything was going to collapse around him, his mind struggling to stay coherent and rational, his scent unknowingly stinking up the room.

Find Gojō Y/N and cage the sorcerer in his arms.

‘Follow the scent, take Gojō Y/N, keep safe. Don’t let Y/N die like I let my brothers die.’

Despite wanting to give chase, the small, single strand of sanity left in him told him not to do such a thing. He’d be what he’d criticized other Alphas for. He may be half curse but he’s no insatiable animal.

“Woah,” he heard Mahito remark. “Looks like we’ve got a problem. Chōsō seems to have finally hit his rut! Talk about bad timing!”

‘Rut? This is what a rut feels like..?’

“Is that so?” Getō croons, with a wicked look of delight. He studies Chōsō’s panting figure before taking a peek back at a shaken Satoru.

“Pfft, it was all because of Gojō Y/N! That’s hilarious! Are you a masochist, Chōsō since you’re getting all excited from a kick to the face? Priceless!” Mahito giggles.

Chōsō can see Satoru begin to struggle even more despite it being futile, he’s bound up so tight and soon going to be swallowed into the prison realm. He’s snarling furiously and his feet even manage to crack a few tiles underneath him, but Chōsō can tell from his panting there’s a bit of panic.

For a moment Chōsō can get him. His family is possibly in danger and he can do nothing but struggle.

He’s mildly offended though since the last thing he wants to do is hurt the ones he’s drawn to. But he understands so he doesn’t take it to heart.

Chōsō’s attention soon goes back to Getō who throws his head back, laughter spilling his lips. “Oh, this is unexpected!”

The laughter only pisses Satoru off and excites Mahito. And meanwhile Chōsō is left with anticipation along with the others.

After his fit of laughter Getō hums with amusement and turns to look at Chōsō, smiling oh so sweetly with an evil twinkle in his eyes. “Well, go on then, Chōsō.”

Chōsō blinks, hearing his own ragged breathing and the permission granted from Getō.

“Go on and hunt Y/N down if you wish. It’s a shame I couldn’t capture them both, but this can work just as well if you capture—.”

“Don’t you fucking dare!” Satoru practically howls, nearly foaming at the mouth.

But Getō ignores him, still staring daggers into Chōsō’s eyes. “Go, Chōsō. Take what’s yours.”

Chōsō feels disgust bubbling in his gut at his words, feeling that the ravenette meant something more sinister when he told him that. But he takes this chance and runs, wanting to find the person that triggered his rut and hope the ache goes away. He also hopes he can keep himself together.

You sprint like you never have before, the wind smacking your face and your lungs beginning to burn. Your heartbeat is like thunderous drums and the air doesn’t seem breathable to you.

That scent.

The scent of elderberries, a pinch of spice, and a touch of blood…

It’s imprinted in your mind no matter how much you try to forget it.

There’s just no way that he’s your fated one.

The universe truly likes to play wicked games…

What’s worse is that it seems like your meeting has brought upon his rut. You just hope to god that your cycle won’t come about from this.

You always take your medication, never missing a beat, but when alphas and omegas typically meet their fated pair or pairs it sometimes doesn’t matter, a cycle may or may not occur.

The best case for you obviously is that if you do hit your cycle, it comes after the battle. If you’re still alive anyways..

So you keep your fingers crossed and push it aside, trying to find the nearest group around.

And thankfully it’s Nanami’s you run into.

Just as you’re about to break the news you’re swiftly cut off by Yūji bellowing out that your brother has been sealed from atop a building.

It makes your chest ache at the news.

“Yeah… S’what I wanted to say,” you pant.

“There’s still hope since we have you here,” Nanami soothes while striding up to you, keeping calm and collected as he typically did.

“There’s just one more problem..”

“And that is?”

“I… I ran into an alpha who’s in a rut,” you explain, leaving out the crucial detail so as to not embarrass yourself. “And he may or may not be coming after me. I didn’t stop to check because Satoru really wanted me out of there,” you continue before gasping, a familiar face appearing in your mind.

“Oh shit! Kento, I just remembered! Suguru— no .. Someone wearing his face is the one behind this.”

Nanami’s eyes widen just a tad and a heavy sigh leaves him. Ino and Megumi both also become alarmed in various degrees.

“That truly is a problem for us all… Here.” The blond alpha rubs his wrist glands against the ones at your neck, dousing you in his comforting scent and slowly muting out yours.

Megumi even comes over and rubs his and your wrists together, not saying a word and not meeting your appreciative stare.

Meanwhile, Yūji is still yodeling.

“Thanks, Gumi. Go ahead and get Yuji,” you tell him softly, ruffling the young alpha’s spiky hair.

The teenager only nods before heading off to get to his friend.

Ino comes over and slings an arm around you for support and to subtly put his own scent on you while Nanami’s nose twitches a few times.

“Your scent should be muted enough, and I’m sure blood and sweat will cover it even more so you should be okay.”

“Thanks, you guys didn’t have to,” you murmur with a weak smile, anxiety still nipping at your heels.

“What did he look like,” asks the blond as you three head up to meet Yuji.

“Dude looks like he’s on death’s doorstep. Like sickly pale looking, dark bags under his eyes, cute spiky space buns, and he’s wearing mostly white and got a purple vest.”

He hums. “Noted. Try to stay with someone if you can.”

You nod. Simple enough but not completely possible.

And as expected you were practically everywhere in Shibuya as the battle ensued, curses swarming the city and people that’s still within the veil being in danger.

You do your best to keep everyone safe, especially the kids, but when the ground underneath you suddenly gets sliced along with a street sign, you throw yourself down the subway where Yūji went not too long ago, slaughtering curses that stood in your way

The underground transit is in complete disarray. Broken glass, walls dented and crumblings, electrical wiring exposed and popping, and blood splattered almost everywhere like it was some art project and the blood is red paint.

Suddenly a wall that connected from the bathroom crumbles away slightly, revealing a bit of pink hair peeking from the other side.

Your feet are already moving, Yūji’s name nearly falling from your lips as dread grips you tight and unforgivingly.

And there’s that smell again, only this time it’s ten times stronger…

Right as you get inside you see the man from before standing over Yūji’s body seemingly about to deliver the killing blow.

Fated person or not, no one was going to hurt the people you care about.

So with your technique you manipulate the water spurting out from the pipes and use it to lock onto the man’s throat, and with an aggravated cry you swing him around and throw him through the wall he made Yuji hit, feeling an immense amount of satisfaction from the pained cry he made.

With him being spat out on the other side seemingly laid out for now and away from Yūji, you rush to cradle the young omega’s bloodied body, fretting over him and trying to figure out how to deal with his shoulder.

You don’t have much to help him and you snap at Sukana to do something, but the bastard for once doesn’t have anything smart to say, the boy still unconscious and bleeding. You pick him up and rush out of the bathroom when a voice stops you in your tracks.

“W-Wait… Please don’t… Don’t go…”

A mixture of anger, stress, and touch of guilt form a cocktail in your gut at his wheezing, panic filled voice.

You hear him dragging his body desperately amongst the rubble to try and get to you.

“You must got a few loose screws in that head of yours,” you spit, turning to look at him.

“N-No, please I—! I had no idea he’s my brother!” he coughs, his pale lips stained with blood.

Your stiffen, your grip on the wounded boy tightening slightly. Either he’s really lost it , or… No, he’s definitely lost it.

“Please I—.”

“ I can’t help you ,” you force out. “Especially when you’re currently the enemy .” And with that, you force your feet to move, leaving him behind.

And Chōsō only watches you with a helpless expression, tears stinging his eyes and a pained noise leaving him as he gives up…

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halfdeadfullgay · 6 months

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Here’s that Danny Phantom fic that I started like two months ago. It’s mainly a crack fic treated seriously that I lost motivation to continue writing. I might come back to it later idk. Anyways ignore this hot mess of a fic as it just bounces around with no real plot lol

ignore any inaccuracies with dc comics or out of character writing this really is just a crack fic, definitely not beta read or proof read

404 - Title Not Found

Part 2 - Tumblr Part 3 - Tumblr

Ao3

Where to start with the Ghost King’s story? Most ghosts already knew at least a bit from hunting him down in his earlier years, way before he was able to clam the crown but now Clock Work was telling Danny that he could either make a mythos version or have the actual story of how a halfa became Ghost King, The Ruler of The Infinite Realms be told for as long as he ruled.

Out of all things that came with being Ghost King, he didn’t expect to be told to that he could mostly make up the story of how he even got to the crown.

Danny with the help of his sister and friends; made his story. It was mostly truth. How he defeated Phriah Dark, the many fights with ghosts and then calming the crown when he turned 18. There were parts that were completely fake. Mainly how he became a halfa. He didn’t want to have the portal accident be connected to him more than it was. He had accepted the way the accident would follow him around. Not just being the whole reason he was Phantom but the pain that still lingered.

When human, he would get shaky, phantom (no pun intended) pains all ever, along with some effects that were easier to manage. At first he didn’t understand the phantom pain, he still had all his limbs but after talking to Vald, who had surprisingly chilled out and stopped messing with Danny(for the most part), it had to due with the fact that he was dead. His whole body thought that one part was dead every other hour almost, sometimes the whole thing.

He had gotten used to it, well as much as he could. Obviously he had the mental side affects to deal with too. Sometimes he would nightmares of some of the more tougher fights. His friends and CW thought that the nightmares were because of Phara Dark and the portal accident. Of course some were but there others too. Mainly Spectra’s mosquito epidemic including the “hospital” and Nocturn.

Being stuck in what should be your desired reality along with everyone’s and seeing all your classmates including your own sister slowly become sick with some kind of ghost virus is the kind of shit that sticks with you. He tried to avoid most nightmares by staying in ghost form but just like when he would be forced to his human half from exughst in a fight; the same would happen with the more sleep he missed.

Sam once asked him if he blamed her for the accident. Of course, he didn’t. No one knew what could’ve happened. While he held no blame for Sam, he blamed himself sometimes when things got bad.

Today was like any other, do some basic royal stuff and then visit other realms/places in the human world to see how the ghosts that resided there were treated. He had gotten use to all the moving over the last few years. He typically loved going to other realms. It was a break for the most part. A break from being King, a break from being Phantom and a Fenton.

Though today was different. He was to visit Gotham, the city said to be alive itself. He lived there when he wasn’t in Amity or the ghost world but hadn’t been back in a while due to problems in Amity.

Living in gotham was an easy way to watch a lot of the dead that roamed there. Particularly a specific living dead who had came back a few years ago. Danny was supposed to see how the pit rage progressed and if it was still affecting years later. Danny had ask CW if he had to since the lazura pit had been around for quite awhile, didn’t they already know and because of the fact that it was creepy to basically stalk someone. He was just told that everything changes and it’s best to always double check.

Now he was invisible and moving through the shadows of Crime Alley. He watched the tops of buildings and alleys. He had chosen Crime Alley as a place to live when human. He knew that the living dead he was supposed to watch had claim over Crime Alley so it was easy to watch. He was careful to not interfere with any part of Crime Alley.

He would stop something if he saw it but knew not to mess with someone else’s haunt too much. Although Danny thought it was creepy, Red Hood was an interesting one to watch. Danny picked up on the fact that Red Hood liked Night Wing but disliked the Batman. Sure Danny could just figure out his identity but that a. be more creepy and b. that would ruin the fun.

But he had messed up when returning home after watching The Red Hood. He was in his human form when heading back to his apartment. He didn’t worry about how dangerous Crime Alley was. Of course he was a bit paranoid sometimes but not really.

One minute he was walking the next he was cornered in the alley next to the apartment complex. Apparently that got the attention of The Red Hood as when Danny started pushing the muggers away and was getting ready to fight; he appeared behind the them and scared the rest off.

Danny kinda just looked at him before saying thanks and quickly heading up the fire escape to his apartment. He wasn’t supposed to interact with the dead that he was meant to watch but now he could feel Red Hood’s eyes on him as he went through his window.

Jason usually knew who was following him but for some reason he couldn’t figure it out this time. He felt like he was being followed, he knew that he was. He had oracle check the cameras in Crime Alley but still nothing.

It annoyed him that he couldn’t figure it out. There was no rumors about any out of towners. It wasn’t till one night when he noticed someone fighting against some muggers in the alleyway of next to the apartment complex he lived in. He was about to stop his patrol for the night so why not end with scaring off muggers.

When all was said and done, he watched the man thank him and leave. Jason watched a bit too long as he saw him go into his apartment. He couldn’t shake the feeling of familiarity with that man. Red hood left to the top of the apartment building. Yes he had multiple safe houses but he liked living in crime alley, more or less to stay away from the Bat.

#dc x dp #dpxdc #dp x dc #dead on main #not finished #fanfic #dp fanfic #jason todd #red hood #danny fenton #danny phantom #cross posted on ao3 #crack fic #not serious #hot mess fic #ghost king danny #au #dp x dc crossover #404 - Title Not Found

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rintarousgirl · 8 months

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kiss me better, baby - an atsumu miya two-shot

PART TWO - MASTERLIST

a/n: so, i randomly got inspired to write a thing like this, and i recognized that i haven't really written for 'tsumu before, so here i go! i tried doing all lower-case for this just to see how it is, because i feel like people nowadays enjoy a story on tumblr more like that, but on ao3 it needs caps?? idk, you tell me.

synopsis -

you and atsumu had been living together happily after your marriage, but after conflicting work schedules and bottled-up feelings, the two of you break into a heated argument. now, it's up to the two of you to mend it, maybe with a kiss? | tags: lack of communication, angst, making up, hurt/comfort, toxic relationship.

you married atsumu knowing, he was frustrating. you knew there would be up's and downs, and fights, and the regular. that's how marriage worked, and quite honestly, how your husband worked.

you knew by the end of the day, you'd be able to smile at him, embrace him, and give him a soft squeeze and a muffled apology as you dragged him in bed to watch a movie with you after work. everything would be alright, that's how things worked.

the two of you never got too worked up over apologies. you recognized that you did something wrong and made up for it with touch rather than words. that was what worked for you and him, and it saved atsumu the embarrassment of a wounded pride.

your friends had always told you that communication was key, and you knew that was true. you knew stating boundaries and expressing your emotions was right in a relationship and the best direction for a healthy bond between two people but...atsumu and you were different. you both had big prides and egos, and even if you were pissed off at day all of that seemed to melt away by the time night fell.

up until recently that is.

atsumu was obsessed with volleyball, you knew that much. it was his life, his career. everyone in his family had played it at some point, but they'd known when to give it up and pursue a career that lasted or one they were more passionate about. personally, you viewed as some passed down tradition, and you knew osamu broke out of it as soon as possible.

and just as reasonably you knew your own child would probably play volleyball to some extent. but that was exactly it. eventually, everyone got older, and their bodies couldn't keep up anymore, or they lost their passion with the sport that they held when they were young. atsumu wasn't like that. every game you still found that competitive spark in his eye, the same spark you fell in love with all those years ago.

but now you could only sigh, watching from the sidelines, phone dangling from your fingertips and your wedding band burning against your skin. was this the life you wanted to live? demoted to some trophy-spouse? no, it wasn't. you wanted your husband back.

atsumu began to stay later at practices, and left earlier in the morning too. when did come back, he'd drop his bag in the foyer, take a quick shower, and collapse in bed. you knew he was tired, and that he worked hard, but he was asleep before you could even say goodnight.

often times, you kind of had to chase him to bed. it would be around nine when he got back, dinner sizzling on the table from where you'd kindly reheated it for him. he presses a quick kiss to your lips, at least acknowledging your existence, and then run for the bathroom.

it was horrible, almost humiliating, even. by the time you had everything cleaned up, his dinner wrapped in plastic and placed in the fridge for him to pick at the next day, he was half-asleep in bed. you'd give his shoulder a comforting squeeze, brush the blonde hair from his eyes, and whisper a soft goodnight before leaving for the living room to watch your nightly television.

and even when he wasn't at practice, he was always doing something. whether it be an interview, or helping out at osamu's shop, or mentoring or watching other teams practices. sometimes, he'd hole himself up in the garage where you'd set up a homemade gym. this had nothing to mention the fact you had work to, a simple quiet office job where you filed papers, typed in numbers, and picked up calls.

it wasn't much, but it paid good money.

so, in the lucky times when you were both home, contact was limited to breakfast and lunch which even then your mouths were full and there wasn't much for you to talk about. the only thing that came out of his mouth were, "volleyball", "see you later," and an occasional, "love you!" without the "I".

somewhere along the line, you came to the conclusion of, well if i barely see him anyway what's the harm in picking up some extra shift for some more money? it wasn't like the two of you weren't comfortable. honestly, you both could live smoothly off atsumu's salary alone, but you were never the stay-at-home type.

atsumu had spared a small comment at that. late at night, as you crawled into bed next to him, he circled his arms around your waist and muttered, "you worked later today," into the soft flesh of your shoulder. you gave a small hum, feeling something bubble in your throat contracting your words.

you didn't have to work, but it was kind of satisfying nonetheless to have him hold onto you because you cut off an extra hour of time you had together. revenge was petty, you knew that, but you were tired of being on the receiving end of missed calls and empty sheets in bed.

his thumb had rubbed small circles on top of your hipbone, and you could feel his mouth twist into a frown. "you don't have to...did the cut your check or something?"

"no," you said into the quiet, "i just felt like it, that's all."

he sighed and buried his head into your neck. you felt yourself smiling despite it all, and he held you a little bit tighter the next few nights.

though, eventually, everything blew up in both of your faces. that night, when atsumu came home you hadn't bothered to reheat his dinner or make dinner at all actually. as you heard the front door shut and then lock, your stomach rumbled, having skipped it as well.

despite it all, you didn't have an appetite. not when you felt nauseous with your anger. you were tired of only seeing glimpses of your husband. hell, shoyo saw him more than you did in a week, maybe even a month.

you couldn't keep living like this. alone, and secluded, the barest hints of comfort coming from his touch. you knew he loved his job, and you wouldn't tell him not to. you just...wished he loved you as much as he loved the stupid game.

you missed your husband, your atsumu. those boyish grins he would give you and chaste morning kisses before he ran out the door. you missed when he would come home right in time for dinner and the two of you could sit down and talk and laugh about your days.

this time though, you didn't hear the sound of the water but instead his soft voice calling out into the silence of the house. usually you had the television on, or music playing when he came home to fill your head with something other than your own thoughts. now though? it was only the sound of his footsteps and your heavy breathing.

the door creaked open, his shadow spilling into the room. you hugged your knees to your chest, looking to the window beside the bed. atsumu walked in, sweat clinging to his skin and his lip caught between his teeth. "baby?" he asks, stepping further into the room, "are you alright?" he reaches forward, pressing the back of his hand to your head to check your temperature.

you gently swat away his hand, huffing as you refused to look at him. beside you the bed dips, and he places a hand on your knee. "what's wrong with ya? i'm all ears, y'know. i kinda promised...in sickness and in health and all that."

a lump rose in your throat, and you struggle to swallow around it as your eyes dart to the silver wedding band on his finger. it glints under the lamp light. you didn't have the heart to reach over and grab your own ring out of its box on the bedside table. atsumu hadn't noticed, but it's been there for the past three days.

"you're tired," you end up saying, "you should go to bed...I'm gonna go," you rush to get up, but you only make it so far before his hand jumps out and grabs your wrist and pulls you back.

he stands with you, pulling you close, still holding onto your wrist. "c'mon now, tell me what's wrong. you're worrying me, y/n," he admits softly, and you half-heartedly tug your hand out of his grip.

"it's nothing," you hiss, glaring at him, "of course you care now."

his shoulders go stiff, and his expression sours a bit. "what are you insinuating?" he mutters, lip curling, "of course i care for you, are ya out of your mind?"

"maybe i am," you grumble, "i'm sure you wouldn't notice then either since you don't seem to give a damn!"

his hands reach up to tug at his hair, before running through it and resting on the back of his head for a second. "i don't get what you're so worked up about. and i won't get it until you tell me!" he shouts, temper rising and patience thinning. well, you could play two at that game.

"oh, get over yourself!" you yell back, "you spend day and night at the stupid gym and i get to sit here all day and rot and wait for you to get back. and guess what? when you do get back it's like i'm talking to a fucking wall!"

he laughs, a little hysterical. "is that what you're upset about? you're upset that i care about my job?" it's so condesencing, and infurating and you just can't anymore. he was a grade-a asshole, and you were done putting up with it.

atsumu was sweet before, he would hold your hand and sway you around to sweet love songs that came on the radio in the kitchen. he's kiss you and laugh at all your jokes, and enjoy your food, and give you all his time. you missed that atsumu. you didn't like this version of him.

"get out," you whisper, hands curling into fists.

"what?" he stammers, a little bit of that anger fleeting from his eyes.

"i said get out!" you scream, shoving him a little. it wasn't enough to knock him off balance, you weren't strong enough for that, but it should've been enough to get your point across.

"you can't be serious," he says with a little huff, a hint of a confident smirk pulling at his lips.

"deadly," you growl, and point to the door, "now out! i don't want to see you tonight, or tomorrow preferably. actually, don't bother coming back from work either!"

you give him another shove, and that gets him to move an inch. you're fortunate that the door is close enough to the bed that after a bit of effort you can get him past the doorframe. he turns around, licking his lips, all that confident aura from earlier gone.

"so you're gonna kick me out? just like that, huh? over something so stupid--"

"honestly, atsumu, if you think this is stupid than you're more of an idiot than i thought. not in a million years had i thought this was the guy i was going to marry, but here we are now."

he stammers to say something, but you're slamming the door, locking it just as quickly. you turn on your heel, but your knees seem to buckle from beneath you.

crumbling down onto the ground, you press up against the back of the door and watch as your world disintegrates around you. your shoulders begin to shake, your lip trembling and eyes spilling over with tears.

the sobs don't begin until you hear the sound of doors slamming as atsumu no doubt packs a bag, and you can hear the metallic clang of the laundry machine door.

your breaths are shaky and wet, and you're choking on them. you don't know how long he's slamming around for, but eventually you can hear the running shower water, and the hallway light flickers off.

the atsumu you knew didn't give up that easily...the atsumu you knew didn't neglect you. the atsumu you knew would've sat on the other side of that door and pleaded to be let in.

and you can't help but wonder what happened? what did you do wrong? what is he hiding from you? an affair? a demotion? something more than that? you didn't know, you weren't sure you wanted to know.

so, for the night, you sat there. shoulders shaking, fat tears rolling down your cheeks, choking on your own spit and sobs. sooner or later, you fell asleep like that, curled up against the door, shirt soaked with your tears and a depression hanging over you like a shield.

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restinslices · 4 months

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MK1 x Winter Soldier Reader Intros

Me not writing only about the Lin Kuei Bros? Who would've thought. Idk why I thought of this but here we are. For those not into Marvel the simplest way to explain TWS is he was in the Army in the 50s then he was injected with the super soldier serum and forced to become an assassin with over two dozen assassinations in the last 50 years. You're not a white guy named James “Bucky” Barnes, you just hold the title. Also you got a metal arm, it’ll make sense later-

Kung Lao: You’re a Winter Soldier?

Y/N: I am The Winter Soldier

Kung Lao: Ugh, more training?

Y/N: Do you expect to get better through sheer luck?

Kung Lao: I take it Liu Kang doesn’t allow assassins to be Earthrealm’s champion?

Y/N: Assassins and failures, such as yourself

Kung Lao: How do I become a Winter Soldier?

Y/N: You don’t

Raiden: It is an honor to be trained by you

Y/N: As is to train Earthrealm’s champion

Raiden: I can’t imagine going through what you have

Y/N: Good. You’ll save yourself nightmares

Y/N: Sometimes I worry I’m not a good person

Raiden: You are a good person through and through

Y/N: I wish I had lightning powers

Raiden: I wish I had your metal arm

(These rabid dogs behind him-)

Liu Kang: I hoped your life would be better this time

Y/N: Why hope when you had the power to change it and didn’t?

Y/N: You let my life go down this path?

Liu Kang: I cannot control everything

Y/N: You let me be a part of Earthrealm’s defenses, why? Pity?

Liu Kang: Because you are a capable warrior who deserves more in life

Liu Kang: Do you doubt my care for you?

Y/N: You expect me to still believe our friendship is real?

Y/N: I am not playing an assassin in your movie

Johnny: Aw, but you have tons of experience

Johnny: How much for the arm?

Y/N: Not for sale

(That debt kicking his ass)

Johnny: Your life could make an amazing movie

Y/N: You’ll become a real victim if I see it

Johnny: Over two dozen assassinations but a date with me would ruin you?

Y/N: If I had to pick between being a mindless assassin and dating you, I’d put my mask back on

Kenshi: Wanna trade predicaments?

Y/N: A blindfold looks much better on you

Kenshi: Have you ever fought a blind swordsman?

Y/N: Not sure it’d be fair to count it as a fight

Y/N: I too understand the need for a new life

Kenshi: Perhaps that is why we are such good friends

Kenshi: Planning on giving me a hand?

Y/N: I don’t think you’d see it coming

Y/N: And they call me The Winter Soldier

Bi-Han: Jokes will not help you win this fight

Bi-Han: You have not a shred of hope against the Lin Kuei’s Grandmaster

Y/N: Your ego is what’ll knock you down in the end

Bi-Han: You won’t have the element of surprise with me

Y/N: Oh Bi-Han, I’ll be the last thing you see before you die

Bi-Han: You alone won’t take the Lin Kuei down

Y/N: I’ve taken a whole country down in one night. Excuse me for not being scared

Kuai Liang: I am glad to have your support

Y/N: You always will

Y/N: Are you willing to kill Bi-Han if he does not back down?

Kuai Liang: I am not sure

Y/N: Liu Kang could’ve made all our lives better and chose not to

Kuai Liang: You have to believe in his judgment

Kuai Liang: Liu Kang is not your enemy

Y/N: He is certainly not our friend

Y/N: I’ve heard you’re a great fighter

Tomas: I’ve heard the same about you

Tomas: You look great for 106 years old

Y/N: God, you gotta stop hanging around Johnny

Tomas: Why still defend Earthrealm if you’re so angry?

Y/N: The same reason you do; the need to protect is bigger than anger

Tomas: Why’d I have to hit Madam Bo and not you?

Y/N: I’m left/right handed and that’s the metal one soooo…

"I'm gonna write angst soon" *proceeds to write dumb Marvel x Mortal Kombat shit* I could've looked for gifs when they clash but my tumblr is actually so glitchy, if I did that I'd Kate Marsh. Also disclaimer. I should be writing Liar pt 3 and I have some of it written but I'm fr not having fun with it. For whatever reason it's just not making me happy like Mortal Kombat is. And as a bitch who has bad depression and that shit gets alarmingly bad during this time of year, uhhh I don't wanna do something that's not making me happy. I'm not tryna go to another hospital so Imma put off writing it until I'm having fun. Who knows, maybe that'll be next week. But yeah, that's for the Shadow and Bone fans here. Also also a fanfic, oneshot, drabble, whatever the fuck about being with Liu Kang (or being friends) and thinking your relationship is fake because as your creator he must've forced it to happen (he didn't but ya know). Am I cooking 'cause I feel like I am.

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fiercynn · 9 months

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bad buddy fandom getting-to-know-you meme!

since there are both recent newcomers to bbs fandom and people like me who are new to bbs tumblr, i thought i'd create a getting-to-know-you meme for people to introduce themselves if they want! all questions are optional

note: i consider "fanworks" to pretty much everything people create related to a fandom, including but not limited to meta/analysis/discussion, gifs, fanvids/edits/fancams, filk, fanart, fanfic, fan food, fan crafts, etc. please include this note with the meme unless you have a different definition!

name and whatever you want to share about yourself

hi i'm deepa! i'm indian-american, in my 30s, queer, and agender – please use my name (either deepa or fiercynn is fine) instead of pronouns when referring to me!

when did you watch bad buddy/join the fandom?

i watched the whole show in the course of about 36 hours just about two weeks after the finale had aired, in february 2022! i joined bbs fandom on twitter soon after and have been there ever since, but i’ve only really been interacting on tumblr in the last few months

favorite ship(s)

patpran and inkpa…i'm a traditionalist ig lol

favorite character(s)

it’s so hard to choose but i think it has to be pran! i love his pining and his cockiness and his anxiety and his kindness and his grumpy faces. really channeling pat right now aren’t i

favorite episode(s)

episode 5 for obvious reasons; my second-favorite is a tie between episode 3 and episode 8 i think

favorite scene(s)

rooftop kiss, episode 3 bus stop scene, episode 8 backstage apology scene, and episode 9 picnic bench hand-holding scene

one thing you would change about the show if you could

LET INKPA KISS GDI

what are your some of your favorite fanworks made by other people?

ughhhhhh SO HARD TO CHOOSE and i think i'll do a longer rec list sometime but here are some of the earliest fanworks i engaged with that really set the stage for how i think about bbs

dynamic (fic, patpran) by riddles2 on ao3: one of the first fics i read in the fandom, it’s pat’s pov through episode 5 and it’s absolutely seminal imo

international love song (fanart/animation, patpran) by @architectxengineer: science is one of those incredibly multitalented people who writes, makes fanart, and animates?? among other things??? and this animation is sooooooo gorgeous and makes my heart absolutely melt

same page (vid, patpran) by dkyth73 on youtube: such a good fanvid of the show that p’aof himself tweeted about it!!!!

(if you create fanworks) what are your favorite fanworks that you’ve made?

traffic was slow for the crash years (fic, patpran): gotta plug my baby, right? this is my patpran fake dating au which is 80k words and was so fun to create!

we both know you’re my only dream (fic, patpran): on the other end of the length spectrum, this 1k fic is one of my favorite things i've written ever

just being friendly (vid, patpran) co-vidded with @scribescribe: yes i know this is an msp song but we made the vid before msp aired!! i think it’s very cute hehe

a song that makes you think of bbs (the ones in the show don’t count lol)

since “just being friendly” is already obvious from me and scribe making a vid to it lol, i'm going to say “keeping tabs” by niki, which is extremely pran-coded. like. look at the lyrics. doesn't it seem like it was written to be about pran’s feelings at boarding school, where he misses pat desperately and hopes pat’s thinking of him but is also trying to convince himself that pat’s forgotten him and that everything pran wanted from him was just a delusion on his part. PRAN 😭 😭 😭

idk anything else you want us to know?

i have opinions about pran’s sweaters

okay i'm literally going to tag all of my tumblr mutuals that i think are still in the fandom (if i missed anyone sorry!!), but also if you want to do the meme consider yourself tagged! please don’t let this flop lol 🤞🏽

@citystoryscapes @nicolasechs @architectxengineer @mahuhumaling @manogirl @galauvant @miscellar @monamay @dancing-out-in-space @melto @incandescentflower @loveongsa @dimplesandfierceeyes @geonbaeeee @faillen @cinnamonseadragon @inkpaa @yourunwiththewolves @prany @pranpats @teesemomma @iathefurrr @inventedfangirling @sharingfandoms @lamonnaie @maychild @thegayneurodivergentagenda @mistergreaves @dudeyuri @nyttvera @thecriers @threezoz @wontbotherrn @not0nmain

#bad buddy #bbs #bad buddy the series #bad buddy fandom #bbs fandom #bad buddy fanworks recs #knowing meme knowing you #patpran #inkpa #bad buddy getting to know you meme #original

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uaremyjae · 4 months

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My thoughts on my One Piece journey and How it’s affected me 🩷

This is going to be long ass post lol

I think this is the platform that I never knew that I will ever comeback to but you know because of one piece and deprived of Sanji, Nami & Law content, ✨ here I am 😁✨ *shamelessly comeback after abandoned tumblr for good 11 years lmao*.

Anyway, I just want to let out my thoughts on my one piece journey and how it affected me. So bear with me. This is only place I can talk about One Piece because other platforms I had is related to kpop * Yes I’m a kpop fan. HEAVY ON NCT. Neo Got My Back.*

I know about one piece way back when I’m teenager. It’s just I don’t start to watch it/ read it somehow?? Idk why 🤷‍♀️ I’m also confused to as why because I did grew up watch anime like FMAB, Naruto, Bleach, Black Butler, K-On, Fairy Tail on tv. HECK I EVEN WATCH THE LONG ASS DETECTIVE CONAN TOO 😭

I think it’s because back in the day ( 2010 - 2017 ), I had lack of access to internet and not exposed to the series at all. Besides the local TV station here, only aired Naruto ,Bleach and those anime I mentioned . *I’m just 24 years old btw*

So around September 2023, I came across to One Piece content on TikTok and funny enough it’s Brook edit! I was so intrigued with this character and little did I know I watch a bunch of One Piece clip here and there on TikTok. To be fair, I am basically spoiled myself that time 😬 but I’m the type dgaf if I got spoiled because I won’t remember at all later on. 🤷‍♀️

So I decide to start watch it. First few episodes, my reaction was like “ Okay Luffy is an interesting guy🧐his body stretches and always smiled! He got damn hands tho ngl”. Zoro, my reaction was like “ahaaa SO THIS IS ZORO THAT EVERYONE KEEP TALKING ABOUT. Quite a Stud.”

Nami, interesting female character that I can relate because I like money 🤑 and her backstory is so sad. Ussop is also another character I gradually love over the time!

Then COMES MY HUSBANDO, SANJI. Man I have a thing for a man who can cook and looks good in suits. Sanji really makes me having my first anime crush ever! I DONT HAVE A CRUSH ON ANYONE IN NARUTO & Detective Conan but One Piece made me have one 🤧 *The upgrade from loving a guy that exist but doesn’t know you exist ( haechan,jaehyun & jaemin bb i luv you guys but Sanji 😮‍💨) to loving a guy who are not exist on this plane of earth 👀*

Little did I know I start to binge watch it. First day of watching, 30 episodes in 6 hours. 10 days later I already watch 325 episodes . but the show is so good! The story telling that oda created really hit home to me and the foreshadowing & lore he created makes me hooked unlike other story that I have read & watched.

Here’s the thing, to me every anime that I watch, I never like finish it . Sometimes I would just watch last ep and called it the day. This is not only apply on anime, it’s apply to western shows, my own local shows & k-dramas. So One Piece truly like solidified their place on my heart. I finally can understand why one piece are so loved for decades!

Also during those times, I hit rock bottom too. I quit my job because I was falsely accused for stealing shit at my work place and being discriminated by my ex-boss due to being the youngest one for my entire work.( everyone else was in their 40’s ). That time I was desperate as I need some money to achieve my bucket-list and want to lessen the burden of my family. Lord heavens knows what I’m going through, got death threats by that mf. Twisted the truth that causing my whole family cut ties with her severely. From there, I felt so stress and worried.

So One Piece is my way of escapism and it’s been a beautiful and exciting journey. Compared to last time, I took a 7 months breaks from works due to burn out & anxiety, this time it doesnt took long for me to overcome those situations and my “year-end blues” that I called is not as bad as before. I also has been actively try to get a job asap so I can buy an Ipad as I want to start learning digital drawing again after watching one piece.

One piece teach me it’s never late to start a new journey towards your dream! I used to dream to be a graphic designer or animators but my family don’t want me to be that. They want me to have that conservative jobs like working in government, an accountant etc. so essentially I gave up those dreams so I can make them proud of me. It’s been bothering me for so long as I felt like I should have go for what I want not what people want. At the end, I abandoned my accountancy knowledge and worked as an admin & a baker which I found a lot more less stressful that being an accountant. I guess what people describe after knows me personally being a confident, free-spirited & rebellious is just the way I am. AND oddly enough One Piece is just perfect manga & anime for me!

At this point, I already caught up with anime. I’m a weekly basis anime watchers now. I also has caught up with manga too. It’s been a huge revealing & fresh experience of One Piece for me. I felt like I being myself again! It’s weird but it’s the truth! I never felt so at ease and being seen. I just want to do what I want. It’s just fitting fate for me to be a One Piece fan!

That’s all what I want to say… if you really read this till the end. Thank you!

#one piece #I’m lucky to found one piece #monkey d. luffy #roronoa zoro #nami #ussop #sanji #tony tony chopper #PEOPLE SHOULD START WATCH ONE PIECE FOR BETTER LIFE! I’m being real here!#soul king brook #franky #jimbei #nico robin

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door-insurance · 4 months

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Revisiting life is strange and its fandom is really bittersweet

I don’t think the fandom is completely dead, it’s not what it used to be and I accept that but it’s bittersweet

also I don’t wanna gatekeep anyone from discovering LiS late, I don’t believe in “true fans”- I’m glad we’re still getting fandom babies hehh, thankfully there is a lot of fan materials to be discovered

I just wanna be a sentimental fool about the life is strange fandom, I was there when the first episode came out I was as old as the characters and it was an event, a moment that can never be replicated- the barbenheimer for tumblr lesbians

We never had a game like this before, it felt tailor made for us and we went crazy

It was fun, you’d just log on tumblr and find new fanart of your favorite character or ship- inside jokes and shitposts were rampant, a couple of fan writers and artists came together and made a fan game- “Love is Strange” where Max gets to romance Chloe, Kate, Victoria, Amber (tell me I’m not the only who remembers shrektoria and Rachel eating a salad while laughing meme)

I made fanart and memes and they blew up but I lost that account

They’d call us sjw trash on YouTube and make fun of the game, we didn’t give a shit

But I think it was around before the storm where i started to lose interest and was burnt out, also I just didn’t like the direction they went with for the game I thought it was an unnecessary edition to the main story (Rachel didn’t need a complicated backstory, Elliot, too much conflict for 3 episodes) and I don’t think I was the only one cause this is where the fan art and fic updates started to slow down

Then I moved on to other things, other fandoms- shit happens.

Life is strange was just another part of my cringey teenage self who the hell cares I was cringe

But now I’m an adult, I have responsibilities and anxieties that I never knew I’d have to deal with- i went through a lot in the last 8 years sometimes I wish I was still that cringey ass teenager. This year was particularly bad, lost someone I loved

I stumbled upon old fan art on Pinterest and it reignited my love for the first game, I felt happy that I had something to take my mind off and goddamn revisiting the fandom years later is so bittersweet. I miss my old fandom mutuals, the blogs that used to update everyday were last active 5 years ago and most of the og fan artists had either rebranded or had left, one of them got hacked

Tumblr doesn’t make it easy for you to look up older posts, you have to rely on old blogs, Google or Pinterest (kinda made it my mission to archive what I can find)

There are new artists doing their own thing and I love that for them! Also people still write fanfics and update them, when I have the time I sketch out my fave characters and ships- it seems like there is a vocal community on tiktok but idk i don’t wanna go there

But it’s not what it was and I accept that, shit happens I’m glad I got to experience it during its peak and that I was left with good memories and content I can still enjoy

I’ve definitely seen shittier and deader fandoms

Before LiS and Steven universe there weren’t a lot of spaces that let you enjoy wlw ships, they were either upstaged by yaoi stuff or fetishized (deviantart) this game and its fan base helped me accept my identity as a lesbian, told me it’s not a fetish when two girls hold hands

#life is strange #lis #life is strange fandom

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henneseyhoe · 1 year

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NEW RULES

Killmonger X BLACK!FEM!Reader.

WARNINGS:death, nothing else yet. Sadly lmfao.

SUMMARY: The reader and her country find themselves in some trouble that only a king can stop.

(Ps.pls forgive any errors and holes in the plot, I can barely see with this tumblr update. Also idk if imma continue this, it’s cute tho lol.)

—

Withering away like sand in the wind, Y/N’s country continued to have loss after loss. Their cattle were getting sick, soldiers were dying off left and right, women around regions struggled to bear children and carry out through their birthing processes without any emergencies, sometimes situations were too heavy for local hospitals to deal with. It was bad. Centuries ago, when her country, Zoru, was cursed with misfortune by an unknown sorcerer. possibly someone who was shunned for various reasons, the empire still refused to crumble, resisting against the energies formed against it. Zoru thrived and continued to many years later, but that luck was wearing thin by the days.

with Y/N’s father, Zoru’s last king, now dead after fighting battle after battle with their countries own tribes, and losing his last fight, he left her to rule over their country. she had no choice but to scramble and scrape to find resources from the next country over to stop the massacre of her own people. When that curse was placed upon her country, her father made sure to meet up with many leaders across the continent, only one agreeing to go hand and hand with Zoru to stay afloat when the curse caught up. Apparently that time was now.

When Y/N heard about the agreement that was made, she was ecstatic. She could barely hold in sobs of happiness. That until she was told she would have to merge countries, marry the king and birth his children. She bit her tongue as her mother explained this to her, her head hanging lowly as her body began to lose it’s confident posture on the throne. She was devastated. Devastated that she would have to not only leave her own country and share her fortune, but forcefully leave a lover she was already fond of for another she barely knew. She thought she would have time to grieve her losses before she was picked up and taken to Wakanda, but she was wrong.

After meetings with elders and constant pep talks from her mother, she was swept up by Wakanda’s own plane-like vehicle. It was a little more advanced than her Countries aircrafts. She kissed her family goodbye, taking extra time at her fathers alter before she was off to handle business that would change her lifestyle forever. Little did Y/N know, she was in for many, many more surprises. Not only did she not know that Wakanda was no longer under T’Challa’s ruling, and that he was pronounced dead, but it was under a man that was much more cruel than the man that she knew.

Upon her arrival to Wakanda, she noticed things looked a bit different since the last time she had been there, but she brushed it off as just too much time passing by on her part. Though she brushed off that curiosity from earlier, she couldn’t seem to shake the feeling of displeasure as she arrived at the citadel, her guards joining other royal guards to lead her to the room where T’Challa’s throne sat beautifully, but whoever was sitting it it was definitely not T’Challa.

Y/N’s eyes squinted as she looked around in confusion, wondering why this man was wearing T’Challa’s clothes and sitting on his throne. Her guards also seemed to have been put into shock, their bodies stilling as they debated on wether to pull out their weapons for safety or keep their composure. They chose the second option for good measure, but their hands stayed ready at all times.

After a good stare down with the man, an intrigued expression on his face as his eyes graced her body, she decided to speak first. “Where is T’Challa?…Who are you?” The man smiled, standing from the seat.

“I’m your king”

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lilrobinbird · 2 months

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Long Ass Tag Game

Cause I wanna get to know you guys better

Thanks for the tag @edas-boytoy <33 Putting this under cut

I accidently wrote looong answer for one question shdhs

How many tumblr accounts have you had before this one?

It's my first one actually haha, I've made like two/three more after this but now they're abandoned forever

Also for this blog I have two sideblogs, I don't really use them now either

How long have you been in fandom?

Like the current one? By the end of July 2023 I posted my first Kyoshi novels fanart and maybe one month earlier I started rebloging and commenting on posts from others, this was after I read the novels and I jumped into their fandom and then in the procces I've also got into tlok and atla (I enjoyed them way earlier but I just didn't participate in their fandoms)

Your favorite trope in fiction?

HMMMmmm Grumpy serious stoick ish x chaotic more fun (and other antonyms that matches first character idk) (whatever heituat has going on))), expressive women with strong personalities, girlfailures<3, severe stern ruthless etcetc women but caring deep down inside (optional), morally gray characters, and I'm just a little obssesed with mother daughter relationships in fiction if that counts as a trope

Your favorite random fact?

That might be well known idk, but sometimes for a video game character they'll hire one person as only just face model, and then differnt person as voice and acting/motion capture

Must feel weird and funny when you basically see yourself in video game doing stuff you didn't do speaking with a different voice

Your favorite game or kind of game?

Now I don't really play video games myself but since I've watched Until Dawn gameplay yeaaaars ago I still like to watch playthroughts of those choice based horror games (the quarry, devil in me, resident evil etc), and later I watch other playthroughts for different choices outcomes scenes etcetccc, The games can be kinda stupid but fun, alsooo playthroughts of adventure games(???), I usually watch them when I eat something

Also CHECK OUT "STRAY"!! I only watched playthrought too but it looks so cool, you basically play as a cat (they did good job with motion capture, feels like real cat moves and it looks so fun to play) and you're in a world when humans no longer exist and there are cool looking robots, you can stratch walls and make robots pet you but I promise it's not just that lolol it has an actual plot and wordbuilding

Aside video games I like chess but I suck big time, but for my defence I mostly played with my friend who sucks even more aHA, we downlanded one chess app for two players and played during some classes

I think I'm just interested in 3d models and graphics hehhh I like 3d modeling

There's also a game called Hades, and this one I actually started playing myself, not the kind of games I'm usually into (roguelike),but friend got me it and! The character designs are very cool

HA nerd long anwser

A place you'd like to visit? (If carbon emissions, logistics and money weren't in question)

Honestly idk, somewhere warm, Greece? Spain would be nice too mmm mm architecture

Or someplace with cool mountains

An animal you're irrationally afraid of?

Ladybugs. No further explenations. But I do appreciate their beauty on photos and from big distance, I'm serious they are very pretty

What's your favorite season?

HMmmm currenlty maybe spring

A smell that brings you nice memories?

I still remember taking a breath of fresh spring air in a specific room last year and getting hit with memories lol, is that even a smell? felt like a smell

(If you're ok talking about food. If not, delete this part)

What's your favorite food from where you were born? And what's your favorite food from some place else?

Pierogi, krokiety and bigos from our stupid potatoland, from other places hmmm, most kinds of pasta maybe, I love pasta, pasta!! which is a little boring but mmmmm mm mmmm pastaaaaa

What's your favorite drink (if you drink alcohol, alcoholic and non-alcoholic)?

I do drink but not too often and I don't really care what, I like flavoured beer, which is alcohol for babies as my friend would say and she might be right but I like it

Do you give your pets random table scraps?

Not too often but sometimes yeah and depends what is it

no pressure tag @korrasamibottles

#tag game

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writingwife-83 · 7 months

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Am I starting another multi chapter? No… probably not… honestly idk. 😆 All I know for sure is that while I was listening to Taylor Swift’s “‘tis the damn season” today this scene legit just popped into my head. I had to get it out lol. Thanks to @thisisartbylexie for pushing me to just do it! I don’t usually share the whole fic on here anymore, but I think tumblr did something that made AI scraping less likely, right? Anyway, hope you enjoy this little modern au one shot. Will I ever do more with it? Who can say? Again, I just had to get it written. ❤️

Hometown

The floorboards creaked loudly when she stepped up into the attic, sounding as angry and bitter as the late owner of this old house had been.

Rey walked around the boxes and tools and junk, silently cursing her grandfather for leaving all this for her to deal with. Not a word of love or care in all these years since she’d left. Nothing but a cluttered old house, left to her out of legal necessity.

Her eyes soon narrowed in on a box in the corner with “Rey” scribbled on the top. Crouching down, she ripped the tape off the box’s seam, opening the top to reveal the contents. She found herself instantly transported back to another time. Another life.

Rey pulled out a little doll, tattered and worn after all the years she’d clutched it close in the nights she’d cried herself to sleep. She swallowed a jagged lump, setting the little thing aside and continuing to pull items out. There were books and clothes and shoes, and little scraps she’d collected as a child. It might have warmed her heart to see that these things were kept, but she knew it was only for lack of care that these random items were all swept into a box and placed in the attic, her grandfather as content to forget her as she was him.

When she reached the very last item at the bottom of the box though, she instantly froze, sitting back against her heels, almost afraid to touch it. Hesitant fingers finally reached out, grasping the weathered red flannel, pulling it out and allowing herself to hold it close for the first time in so many years. Rey’s eyes clamped shut… she could smell his soap. Maybe the cling of the subtly spicy and woodsy aroma was long gone from the fabric and this was just a memory. It didn't really matter. Because either way, just like that, it filled her senses all over again. He filled her senses.

The slow walks in the woods, the long country drives going nowhere, the late night laughter over nothing at all, the almost daily light hearted arguments because neither were good at admitting when they were wrong.

And the way his arms wrapped around her body had taught her what it was to want something more than friendship from a boy.

Before Rey knew it, she was slipping her own arms into the flannel and pulling it up over her shoulders, allowing herself to get as close to those memories as she could. She was swimming in the thing, just as she was the night Ben put it on her as he walked her home, grumbling about how she was always cold and never remembering her own jacket. But he didn’t mind, not really. She could tell. He looked almost pleased at the sight of her in it, but his lips twisted away the smile that threatened for just a moment. So quick, you could almost miss it. But she didn’t, and it warmed her almost as much as the flannel that still carried the literal warmth of his body.

God, if she could only go back to that moment, and a hundred more just like it. If she could only have stayed in this town a little longer, to see where those moments would have led. To see if one night his arms might have stayed around her a little longer and held her a little tighter.

But they never got that chance. Ben seemed almost as eager for her to leave town as she was, to get away from her grandfather and to make something more of her life after high school. He was excited for her. Sometimes she wondered what she might have done if instead Ben had begged her to stay.

But he didn’t.

Rey hugged the flannel a little tighter around her body, realizing that her eyes had started to cloud. She had to sniffle genuine tears away, even though she wasn’t sorry for the loss of any other part of her life in this town. The loss of him was more than enough.

Shaking her emotions off and standing up, that old shirt hanging almost to her fingertips, she looked around at the seemingly endless work it would take to unload this house. She wondered how long she’d have to stay here and be away from the city. This wasn’t exactly the vacation she’d been wishing for, but it had to be done regardless. And maybe something good would come from all of it.

Not that she could hope to see Ben Solo again, she thought to herself with a little laugh, hands absentmindedly smoothing up and down the comforting fabric against her arms. What were the chances he’d still be here in this town?

Right here where she’d left him seven years ago.

Read on AO3

#reylo #modern au #fic: hometown #song fic #sort of #inspired by taylor swift #tis the damn season

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e77y · 5 days

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Long but relatively unserious vent/rant below the cut (sorry I added this in bc I realized how long this post is oops)

Being at the center of some kind of internet witchhunt (which ik is kind of buzzwordy but) is literally my biggest fear ohhh my god. Even a small scale one… I think I would Die. Maybe it’s because I had a similar thing happen with my friend group in high school where one of them convinced the others I was like evil and spread all these rumors about me… 😭 He was splitting on me but still. That’s an explanation, not an excuse. And it basically confirmed all of my intrusive thoughts about myself, and my personality completely self-destructed and changed, and I haven’t interacted with any of those people the same way since. I isolated from them for MONTHS and just loathed myself. Bleh

The reason it’s on my mind is bc I’ve seen this happen to friends and mutuals and even just people I’ve followed in small fandoms, where the whole fandom hates them bc of this little drama and like. I KNOW that fandom drama is not the end of the world, but truly I think that would destroy me for months. And I would never be able to set foot in those spaces again :’) Getting a handful of rude comments about a fucking transfem hc I had at like 14 made me stop writing fanfic for YEARS 😭😭😭 sigh. Just bc they said it was ‘out of character for him to want to be a girl’ 🙄 (<- character who canonically felt confident when dressed as a woman btw. initially for a disguise but then she grew to love it. BUT I DIGRESS KNSHFJW)

All this to say I think that’s why I tiptoe around everything I say online… I am SO scared of ruffling feathers, but I know that fandoms are places for like! Having fun! And it’s not a big deal! And it doesn’t affect my real life! But like idk.. I just hate the idea of being hated by anyone. I’m sure that I ANNOY some people, and that’s whatever; I talk a lot and make overly personal posts sometimes (like this lol) but I don’t wanna be HATED yk? And idek if it’s better to be hated and ostracized publicly or resented in secret by people who still interact with you… :( Agh. If you ever have an issue with me, please DM me instead of letting it build up into something worse!

ANYWAY LIKE.. with fandom stuff. Idk. I want to have fun! I want to write and post things on Tumblr and AO3 etc but I am just very scared of peoples’ opinions, especially now that I have a decently popular/well-liked longfic in DnDads. For some reason I have convinced myself that writing bad or self-indulgent NSFW will make everyone hate me lmao. Like girl the POINT of fanfic is to be self-indulgent……….. sigh I need to get out more

^ light-hearted… but also kinda true haha. I stay at home a lot just bc I don’t have many reasons to go out atm and only a handful of close friends to go out with. Hopefully that will change when I move next semester lol. And whenever I get interests, they’re VERY strong and long-lasting, and fanfic writing is one of my main hobbies, so I get REALLY into online communities. And rn that is kind of my little niche fandom Tumblr bubble… which is embarrassing and probably unhealthy but whatever. I just inevitably get a lot of anxiety about things that are important/fun to me (bc OCD), especially bc I’ve never really had mutuals/‘friends’ in a fandom before this, excluding my irls

Anyway this got longer and more vent-y than I intended so I will tag accordingly, and sorry to whoever is reading this lol; I just wanted to get my thoughts written down in a public forum bc idk… Makes me feel less insane when ik other people can see it, too. Helps me not take it too seriously and spiral lol.

#vent #cw vent #rant #delete later #<- like tomorrow morning I’m shre #usually I delete stuff like this immediately but I’ll try to keep it up #was talking to my mom earlier about OCD and intrusive thoughts and whatnot….#she definitely has it too. like undoubtedly #her intrusive thoughts and compulsions sounded exactly like mine #which sucks for me bc my dad ALSO definitely has OCD (in a more outwardly recognizable way) so! wahoo! double whammy #just feeling kinda defeated about mental health stuff #I feel like it’s never gonna get better #I need to go to therapy or a psychiatrist or SOMETHING #it’s been like 4 years now since I was originally supposed to go lol #and I keep putting it off out of fear (I think)#my friends (irls) have all been getting diagnoses and prescriptions lately #which is exciting for them but :( idk. I feel like there’s no way to medicate whatever I’ve got going on except SSRIs????#and I don’t really want that #mostly though I’m just scared of going back to therapy or to a psychiatrist bc I think they’ll think I’m lying or crazy or whatever #which sounds stupid when I write it out but idk #I should probably keep a journal but when I’m only writing for my own eyes I just kinda wallow in it and write concerning poetry lol #I like journaling in a way other people can see (even if y’all DON’T like seeing it lmaoooo) bc it makes it feel more real?#and out of my head.. concrete etc.#wackyposting #<- seriously need to change that tag still lol

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youmarin · 1 year

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Carved Into Our Hearts | Minho x Reader!

A/N: Is The Maze Runner fandom dead? Turns out not as much as I thought it was (as I go through the Minho tag. There are posts from last yr so let's see if I'm not wrong). I watched the movies again after so long (I’m still traumatized by Newt’s death so that keeps me from watching them often) this weekend and as a result my obsession with this story returned. Whatever this is that I just finished writing down popped into my head today and I had to get it out. It is set before the maze so I made a bunch of shit up (I haven’t read the prequels so if we have more details of stuff before the maze they’re unknown to me). Also I don’t know how it never occurred to me to write for TMR during my strong phase as a fan. It’s my first time writing for it since I know about fanfics, Wattpad, Tumblr, AO3 and all that - and I know about this since looong ago xd-. But here you have it. Surprises even me that I started the year by bringing this to my blog. And we’re starting with none other than Minho! Pls forgive me if this ain’t that good *covers her eyes*. Seriously, the toughest part was naming this T-T.

Word count: +3.1K

Summary: After spending most of your childhood on a WICKED facility, you start to question your place in there once you reach your teens. This only increases when people start disappearing. Things turn even worse when you and your closest friend (and the boy you like) try to look for answers and come too close to uncover their objectives.

Genre: sci-fi, mystery, thriller. A dash of romance sprinkled there. It's angsty.

tw (Do I really need to put these if you know what the story is about? But just in case): Mental and physical abuse, drowning (?), death mention, cursing. idk if left smthn.

You stared at the little boy across from you as you both sat in the small waiting room. Dressed in white, just like you, his black hair nicely trimmed covering his forehead. His arms crossed in front of his chest, he looked around, seemingly unhappy to be there. He noticed you looking, then looked towards the men in uniform that stood near every door and back at you.

“Hey.” He whispered.

“Hey.”

“What’s your name?” he asked you.

“Y/N. What’s yours?” your big, curious eyes looked over at him expectantly.

“I’m Minho.”

“Nice to meet you.” Your dad had taught you that was what you said when you met someone. That, and to shake hands, but you didn’t dare to stand and walk over to him in case that would make the guards mad. You exchanged a smile instead.

Then, the door to the lab opened and a woman came for you, taking you into the room. You looked over your shoulder as she nudged you inside and waved back at Minho.

After that, he met with you in the equally white common room. He called you over to the table he sat on with other boys at the time of your meals and presented them to you. When he didn’t feel like sharing the attention of his new friend he’ll tell you to sit somewhere else and both of you would go to a separate table. One of the boys, the blonde boy, would stick out his tongue at you when Minho did that, making you giggle and as a result he’d grin before turning to his other dark haired friend and leaving you two alone. He’ll sneak into the girls section to get to your room sometimes, and you’ll talk and make up games. Before the guards made their rounds, he’ll hurry to sneak back to his room but not before wishing you a good night.

As you grew, your relationship with Minho did too. You two were rarely away from each other, apart from when you slept, when they called you to the lab to run some tests or while you completed your assigned tasks - and even then, you’d glance at each other through the holographic screens and share a knowing smile.

The thing was, Minho had always been quite the problematic kid to the people who ran the place. It wasn’t a surprise when he reached his teens and got more rebellious, non-compliant and impulsive. You understood him, for each time things started to turn more and more suspicious.

One day, you watched as he was pulled in by a guard into the common room. His eyes immediately searched for you, and when he did he smiled yet seeing the worried look in your eyes he hurried over to you.

“What’s wrong?”

Another one of your friends was missing. You had asked one of the guards about it, but they just said they had to take him somewhere else.

“It’s obvious they want something from us. The tests, the stupid stuff they make us do everyday. I’m getting tired of people pricking and prodding at my skin and all the beeps from machines.” He said, and honestly, you were too.

“But what can we do?” No one would tell you anything besides the same words: what you were doing there will someday help the entirety of humanity. But what the hell were you doing? What was going on outside? And where the hell were they taking the others? Would you end up there too?

First, you tried entering into the information systems during the time you were supposed to work on your daily assignment. You eyed the guards subtly and Minho kept watch for the woman who supervised you. You thought some of the others were staring at you while you worked but told yourself maybe you were being paranoid.

“I couldn’t find anything. There’s no access from our stations.” You told him later that night when he snuck into your room.

He muttered a curse, looking down as he thought of something else. Then the idea popped up in his head.There was a room where you saw the men and women dressed in white gowns disappear into every day. It was labelled with bold, white letters as ACCESS TO PERSONNEL ONLY. You will sneak inside. But you needed a key.

Before he could tell you, the heavy door opened and a guard was pulling Minho to stand up from your bed.

“What the hell are you doing here, kid?”

Minho shook away from the guard’s hold harshly. “Get your hands off me.” Then he pushed him.

The guard didn’t like that, and smacked Minho with his baton. That was the first time you saw a guard actually hit one of you, “Minho!” you rushed to his side as the boy stumbled. “What is wrong with you?” you sneered to the guard as you noticed the small cut on Minho’s temple. But the guard pulled him away from your grasp and out of your room.

Ever since that day, the guards grew more aware of you two, surveilling your every move and doing everything to keep you apart. But Minho noticed how fatigued you looked each day when they brought you to the common room from the labs. He frowned, worried and frustrated to not be able to reach you. You weren’t even looking at him anymore. They had done something to you.

Finally, one night he snuck inside your room again. Since they had taken away your “privilege” of having the doors unlocked, he had to look for another option: the vents.

Startled by the sound of the lid of the vents hitting the ground and sliding on the floor from under your bed, you looked down from your position, your head upside down and your hair touching the floor.

“Minho!” you exclaimed surprised and almost smiled before your expression denoted your concern, then it appeared to go blank, “You can’t be here.” you warned him as he slid out from under your bed.

“Are you okay?” He ignored you, grabbing your face in his hands.

“You can’t be here.” he followed your worried gaze to the door.

“It’s alright. Hey, hey, what have they done to you?” He kept inspecting you. You had dark circles under your eyes, and a far look on your face. When your gaze focused again on him, tears were threatening to fall from your eyes.

“I thought they’d hurt you, but then I saw you back in the common room and you were alright.”

“What? What are you talking about?”

“I couldn’t make out what was real and what wasn’t. I tried to protect you.” He didn’t understand what you meant.

“I’m right here.” He tried reassuring you. “Don’t worry about me, okay? I’m right with you. I’m okay.”

You brought your hands up to his face much like he had done earlier. It was real, he was okay. You noticed the small cut on his temple and brushed your thumb gently over it. Looking at him in the eye you smiled and he gave your forehead a kiss.

“Listen. We’re going to find out what’s happening here, okay? ” He explained to you his plan. “And we’ll get out of here. We’ll get our friends, everyone out.”

The next couple of days, Minho behaved himself, which got the guards and everyone pleased and as promised, he reached you again when he had succeeded in getting his hands on a key.

You snuck into the vents and the corridors during the night, ducking to avoid the motion-activated lights placed every few meters on the walls. When you reached the end of the hall, you looked around to find the door you were looking for. Minho was about to lean to look when you extended your arm to prevent him from doing so. You placed your index to your mouth telling him to keep it quiet. Someone had come out of the room, the door locking after them. Thankfully, they went down another hall. Next you were both dashing towards it. Minho grabbed the key and slid it on the door lock. When it gave you access, you pushed it open carefully.

The room was dim litted, glowing a pale blue. There was more strange equipment inside, more holographic screens with pictures of people with records and stats at their sides, an entire wall of what looked like small safes, all of them locked. There were a couple of tables. You walked towards them as Minho glanced at the screens.

The table you loomed over was a smart table, displaying what seemed like the blueprints of a large building. More like a maze. You frowned, then heard Minho speak up, stealing your attention, “These are some of the guys that are gone.” He turned to look at you, confused over the discovery.

“Are they okay?” You asked and went over to his side. Inspecting the screens, you were relieved to see most of them were, until you reached the last one and saw written in bold red font: DECEASED. You looked at each other, horrified.

“Where do you think they took them?” He asked you and you turned to look at the smart table. He followed your gaze, “What-What the hell is that?”

But as he started to make his way over it, you heard the boom from the door unlocking. Quickly, you grabbed his arm and pulled him with you to hide, cornered between the wall and the control panel under the screens.

Minho crawled until he reached the other corner of the control panel, seeing a bigger screen appear at the end of the room, holograming a woman dressed in all white just like them, who spoke to the person that had walked in, another woman.

“How is the transfer process?” the woman asked.

“We’ve reached halfway and have sent a considerable group already.” She tried to make it sound as if everything was going perfect. But the other woman, who seemed to be the one in charge, knew better.

“I’ve heard there’s been a couple of setbacks.”

“Oh. yes. One-one of the subjects died this morning in an accident. Nothing to worry about. He wasn’t one of the brightest nor of the immune ones.”

“What about y/n and the Minho boy?” You both grew even more wary, if possible, at the mention of your names.

“We’ve dealt with it. In fact the situation turned out to be beneficial. The tests we’ve run on her have come with promising results. Once she’s transferred I’ve no doubt the odds on her will increase. The boy is brilliant too, although he keeps growing more suspicious and uncontrollable ever since we avoid letting them be together. They influence each other too much.” She paused, thinking, before suggesting, “Should we send him next?”

She considered it, “Not yet as long as he doesn’t create more trouble.”

“We’ve been more cautious these past weeks in order to prevent any more incidents, but I assure you we’ll gradually resume to operate as usual.”

Your eyes met, terrified.

Managing to sneak out without getting caught, you started to panic once you reached your room safely. Transfer? The image of the building you saw on the smart table was brought back to your head. Minho. They would send Minho away.

“Y/n?” He called for you for like the fifth time, shaking you a little, and you finally snapped back.

You choked out. “They can’t send you away.” Closing your eyes tightly and shaking your head refusing the sole idea, that’s when you noticed you had started to cry. What if you never see him again? What if he ended… You didn’t dare finish that thought.

“Calm down. If they’re taking me anywhere, we’re both going. I’m never leaving you.” This time, he didn’t exactly believe the words coming out of his mouth. Judging by what they’d heard, they would send him to whatever that place was sooner or later anyway. Just thinking of being separated from you was killing him. Ever since that day when you were little kids and you had greeted each other, you’ve turned to be his entire world, the most important person after being separated from his family. He loved the friends he’d made here though, but it wasn’t the same type of love he felt for you. Minho realized as those thoughts flooded his mind, that you were more than a friend to him. He was in love with you. And this just terrified him more for what your futures would be like. A tear had managed to escape him. Seeing as you weren’t consoled by his false reassurance - he knew you were smarter than that- , he tried something else. He cupped your face as you sniffled, and you slowly looked up from the floor to his also teary eyes. He looked down at your lips. You noticed and nodded at him, giving him consent. Your eyes shut as your lips met in a tender kiss, as if he was scared you’ll both break, or that you would disappear when he opened his eyes.

“I love you.” you said breathily once you pulled back and rested your forehead on his.

“I love you.” Minho said back, “I love you.”

“Promise me,” you started, “That if we get separated we’ll find each other again.”

“They won’t separate us.” He tried again, stubbornly.

You pulled back and when he opened his eyes he found you already looking at him, serious. “Promise me.”

“Of course I promise.”

“You won’t forget me.”

“I’ll never forget you.” He kissed your forehead.

The guards had stopped escorting you both away from each other a couple of days ago, but you still acted like you didn’t acknowledge each other. Minho had told you he would tell the others what you’ve seen and what you had heard. You needed as much help as possible if you planned to get out of that place.

But one day all hell broke loose. You and Minho had noticed that it took them longer between each of the guys they took away. That’s what the woman was saying back in the room you sneaked in.

They had started again. Today, Newt was missing.

As Minho entered the room, you saw him throw a subtle glance over at you before getting to his table. “Where’s Newt?” He looked around, stranged. None of the boys could answer that for him. He scowled, standing up and so did you. No. no. no.

“Where’s Newt?” He hurried over to one of the guards and stood up to him.

“I don’t know who you’re talking about, kid.”

“Oh, you don’t know?” he let out a dry chuckle. “You know, a blondie, about this tall.”

“I said I don’t know. Return to your seat.”

“I don’t want to. I want you to answer my fucking question.” Another guard came and tried to pull Minho away and back to his table. “Don’t touch me!” He punched the guard.

“Minho!” you ran over to him as one of the guards punched him on his stomach making him double over. “Don’t you fucking touch him!” You threw yourself at the guard that was about to hit him again. Another one pulled you away at the same time the other two grabbed Minho by his arms.

“Let her go!” He struggled in their hold. They began to drag you out of the room going separate directions. You weren’t headed to your bedrooms. You knew what this meant.

“Minho!” you screamed in a panic. You heard more struggle and grunts. Then he was punching the guard holding you. It was no use. More of them came.

He was just able to grab your hands, frantic, before one of them hit you in the head and dragged you away, as he screamed and pushed and punched everyone in his path before he felt something sting him. The fight started to leave him, as his vision became spotted. Then his consciousness left him.

You didn’t see him or any of the others the following day, nor the next, and the next, and the one after. They kept you in your room, bringing you meals you hardly touched, escorting you out to the showers, to the labs. They didn’t even give you tasks to do. Clearly they were assessing how bad the situation was. They sent a man to ask you some questions, wanting to know if you knew anything about their schemes. You gave them nothing and in return, they gave you hell. Only one thing came out of your mouth: What had they done to Minho.

You saw him once as you got out of the labs, as they guided him out of one room to another, and you shrugged off the guard’s hold on you, sprinting and yelling his name. Drowsily, he raised his head and when finally your voice and the sight of you registered in his brain, he struggled to break free from the guards, yelling your name back. But they got to you before you could reach a section of the building you’ve never been to.

You both had been put through so much, yet the worst part until then was soon to come. Given your uncooperative behaviour, they came up with the idea of giving things a twist, something they’ll exploit to their benefit. That night when they fetched you from your room, you didn’t know what was happening, what they were going to do to you now.

They took you to a room with small compartments in which a person could fit, its doors made of glass. And there you saw him inside one of them, “Minho? Minho!” they had let you go, and you ran towards it. He couldn’t see you, nor hear you as he banged his fist on the door. It was a one way mirror. “What are you doing to him?!” You shrieked and then you both looked down, water coming up from orifices on the floor. Minho started screaming louder as dread took over him, and you helplessly watched and banged at the damn door, shouting for them to stop whatever they were doing. They were going to kill him. This wasn’t one of those illusions they made you go through before. They were going to kill him out viciously and you could only witness, unaware of why these horrible people were torturing you, why they were using all of you. They started to drag you away as the water reached his chin. You thrashed, screamed and cried for them to stop. And that was your last memory of him, and of you, before all of it vanished, ended, only to start again differently.

Part 1? (Edited 1/16/2023: Part 2 is out).

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