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arcadejohn127-9 · 3 years

Note

Okay so I have a personal head cannon that demon hunters are a thing in the Obey Me World. So I wondering if you could do the brother and undatables finding out that a bunch on demon hunters kidnapped MC while they were in human world because they found out of MCs packs. Your writing is so good, honestly this is one of my favorite Obry Me accounts.

Thank you! It gives me pride for being one your favourites!

I love expanding the world of obey me and idea of hunters is one that seems realistic in a world of demons and angels and just in general, really interesting. Before I joined writing on Tumblr I was actually a Wattpad author and one my books was about a monster hunter who got in a love square with Frankenstein's monster, Dr Jekyll and Mr hyde

Never finished it but it was fun concept so any type of supernatural hunter already just wins in my department

Do I have a thing for making the demons violent and showing off a more aggressive and bloody side to them? Yes, I really do

Warning: kidnapping, gore-ish, violence, religious themes, angst, guns, mentions of torture, long

Your breathing grew heavier as the crushing feeling on your chest continued to grow, your heart slamming against your ribcage. Begging to be released from its suffocating prison. If it weren't for the lump in your throat you were sure your heart would of leapt out of it.

your feet pounded against the street beneath you; you were running faster than you’ve ever ran before. How did it get to this situation? well, you didn't have time to reminisce but to make a long story short - a group of demon hunters revealed themselves to you and are now chasing you down as you refused to cooperate. they wanted to use you for your pact and you didn’t want to be involved, especially seeing as they were literal demon hunters! they were going to kill your friends!

but sadly, fate was not on your side. your ankle twisted to the side, pain shooting up from your ankle all the way to your knee. rope surrounded you, you thrashed against the net as your body slammed to the floor. The last thing you saw was the hunter tower above you, the butt of their gun coming down on your head.

when you finally woke up you already had a gun back in your face, you tried to escape but you were forced backwards. chains rattling behind you. you looked behind you to see you were chained to a cross, both your wrists and ankles were bound.

Your situation only grew worse when the hunter Infront of you snarled down at you. Demanding you used your pacts, spitting on your face. You thrusted forward, matching their snarl as you bared your teeth at them. Demon mannerisms have rubbed off on you but it wasn't doing you any good. The gun clicked, unlocking off safety mode.

Your heart sunk immediately.

"Use your pact or else."

You could only hear the blood rushing through your ears. Trembling as their finger slowly pressed on the trigger. You knew they were going to kill the brother's if you did but you were terrified that were going kill you. You shook your head, letting it hang low as fat tears rolled down your cheeks.

You kept refusing to use your pact and summon the seven demons. Every time you refused they'd hurt you; kicking you, slamming the guns butt down on your head, throwing your head back on the cross. You could barely hear what they said, they just kept screaming at you. Calling you filth and a traitor to mankind.

Despite all the pain you were grateful they weren't killing you. You just had to keep pushing your luck. You couldn't summon them no matter how scared you were. You refused. You couldn't do it.

But fortunately, Magic doesn't always act the way you want it to. Your soul - your entire being BEGGED to be saved. You wanted to save yourself, you desperately tried to spark at the chains and remember any spells but your mind was at a blur. nothing was processing.

You cried out when you saw the large magic circle appear on the floor. You tried desperately to close the summoning circle, cursing to yourself. You demanded your magic to listen to you but it wouldn't work. The brothers symbols appearing in each part and soon enough, they appeared in full demon form.

"FIRE-!"

Lucifer:

his wings blocked at the rapid bullets going their way

His whip quick to come out and wrap around a hunters wrists, he twisted his hand around it and pulled the poor hunter towards him

"This isn't very welcoming, now is it? How bold."

the hunter went flying, the brothers dodging in time

Mammon:

He smirked, a bullet between his teeth and more between his fingers

Steam was drifting off them but he just crushed the metal bullets with no other thought

"How nice of ya to give me a gift~! You really know how to make a demon happy."

He spat out the last bullet and it went flying, hitting a hunters eye

Levithan:

The ground shook beneath you, many hunters missing their shot at his brothers

A crab like beast bursted out of the ground, sewer sludge splattering on the floor

It swiped and grabbed at the hunters, screams filling the space, bodies snipped in half in seconds

"You're all worse than Normies! You took the wrong human from the wrong demons!"

he back hand slapped a hunter that approached him, growling

Satan:

He leapt off the crab, grabbing the nearest hunter to him by the head

Their neck snapped to an odd angle and they immediately dropped

"This isn't how I expected to spend my evening but you took my reading partner....you won't receive my mercy."

He shoved his clawed hands through their chests and spines, ripping out the first organ or bone he could grab

He didn't lie, he didn't show an ounce of mercy

Asmodeus:

His wings flapped behind him, he dragged his claws along the backs of the hunters he flew past

Giggling as they screamed in pain

"Aww I'm just flirting, was it really that bad?"

He pouted before swiping at their faces

Shoving another hunter towards his more violent brother

Whilst he had no issue letting himself get wild, he saw how scared you looked

He didn't want to get too dirty or else how could he comfort you?

Beezlebub:

Beel could be ruthless if TRUELY provoked

And hearing your whimpers when he arrived stirred furious anger within him

When he finally saw your beaten state it made him snap

Hungry for blood

Hunters head being crushing with ikr hand

"You don't even look appealing to eat, you're worst than Solomon's cooking."

He took a chunk out of one hunter when they aimed at one of his brother's

Refusing to let his family get hurt

Belphegor:

We all know he's cold blooded

So it was no surprise blood was gushing everywhere

His dream dust filling his area and nightmares surrounded the hunters

"They're mine....and yet you stole them and hurt them, you're disgusting."

hunters would disappear into the mist and not come back out alive

Bodies littering the floor as he swooped through

As soon as things got gory your eyes were sealed shut, trying to shut out the sound of flesh tearing and screams of agony. Whimpering as you thought about the brothers smiling faces, how gentle and soft they usually were. Chanting in your head that they were here to save you, you were safe, they're still them.

You screamed as your body was lifted off the platform you were on, the cross rising. You were now fully crucified; feet slipping as you struggled against the cross. The chains were barely supporting your weight so you just dangled, fear rising in you.

Mammon charged towards you, his brothers continuing to fight against the hunters. He ripped the chains out of the cross, you fell right into his arms, your heart thumping against your chest.

"look at what they did to you....I shouldn't of protected ya, I hope you'll learn to forgive me - they busted you up real bad."

He caressed your cheek; eyes glaring at your busted lip and the many bruises forming on your face. You winced when his hand touched the side of your head, he recoiled feeling something warm on his palm. It was blood. YOUR blood.

He almost broke down right there and then, looking at how hurt you were - he couldn't handle it.

"thanks...that makes me feel so much better." You let out a pained laugh, hoping to make him feel better.

He only frowned more, softly rubbing his thumb on your cheek. It was obvious he was struggling to keep himself calm. You held his hand, showing off your best smile.

"i don't blame any of you, the hunters did this, okay? You didn't do anything wrong."

Your sweet moment was ruined when the 6 brothers backed all bumped into the two of you. Forming a protective ring as the hunters surrounded them; it seemed like there was no end.

You raised your shaky hands, magic swirling around your wrists and to your fingertips. You barely had enough strength to put on a little light show but you weren't going to just let the demons defend you without even trying to help.

It your lucky day as suddenly, the hunters hideout doors bursted open. You could barely make out the outside but there was blood coating every wall, steam coming off dead bodies. Soon enough four figures emerged and your heart almost leapt out of your throat.

Lucifer growled as he strangled a hunter, turning his attention to the new comers.

"I'm surprised you came so late, espically with the company with you, my lord."

Diavolo laughed, his hands coming together as his magic flared brightly. Barbatos had his arms behind his back, smiling to all of you.

"Forgive our tardy timing, these hunters are determined."

"don't forget us, though I may of caused us to take our time, it's been so long since I've fought this many people."

Solomon adjusted his sleeves, his many pacts glowing against his skin. Simeon, unlike the others, looked completely untouched by the chaos. Smiling as he kept his hands together.

"I beg for your forgiveness (Y/N), It appears we've angered Lucifer more than the hunters have."

UNDATEABLES↓

Diavolo:

Time slowed down within the room, only the hunters going still

Their movements frustratingly slow

"I think it's best to clean up this situation whilst you take (Y/N) back, they've seen enough."

He looked at Lucifer, both men nodding

The prince moved freely through the frozen room, eyeing the amount of hunters

Barbatos:

He bowed to the brothers, offering you a comforting smile

"I must agree with my lord, things will get rather unpleasant."

He slowly slipped off his gloves

He approached you, gently handing you his gloves and patted your shaky hands

A silent request to keep them safe for him

Solomon:

The wizard blew the steam off his wand

Smirking as he pointed it towards the magic still present around your wrists

"Isn't it good I came along? You're going to fall sleep if you keep using your powers, little apprentice, let me open a portal for you."

Just as he finished talking he summoned a portal to the devildom

He gave you a small salute

Simeon:

He hastily rushed towards you all

Checking on each brother for any serious harm, thankful they were okay

He turned his attention to you, doing the same

"all is going to be okay, I promise, I'll bring over some desserts when we get back - tell Luke I won't be long, I know he's anxious about your safety."

He walked you to the portal, caressing your hands

You got a gentle push towards the portal

Once you were all through the portal, you completely shattered. Crumbling to the floor as you broke down sobbing. The brothers tried to approach you again but your nostrils flared, face scrunching up in disgust. They reeked of blood and guts.

Beels mouth was covered in blood, flesh between his fangs. Levithans hands trembling from adrenaline red and stained with blood. Belphegor was showered in the red liquid, a feral look still in his eye. Mammon was the most clean out of all of them but he had blood dripping down him. Asmodeus had flesh on his nails and blood on his cheek. Satan looked just as drenched as belphegor, his shoulders shaking with anger. And finally, Lucifer was the second cleanist but he still was no better than the others.

"i need time to- time to calm down....just.... please just wash."

They all accepted your wishes, hesitant but they understood your predicament.

You laid on the floor, chains still on your wrists and ankles. They felt so tight on your limbs, you whimpered as they scratched at your skin. It took one small burst of magic to make them drop; you were finally free.

You continued to just lay on the floor, shakily grabbing a nearby pillow. Inhaling the sweet comforting scent, letting it fill your scenes. Everytime you even smelled a faint swift of the gore-ish scene from before you just took in another deep inhale.

You laid there for what felt like hours. Silently crying as you hugged the pillow.

You grounding yourself. Reminding yourself you were safe and back in your room. The brothers were safe and they weren't mindless beasts.

You rolled on your side, something poking your hip. It was your phone. You pulled it out from your pocket and began to type, messaging Luke that Simeon was okay aswell as you, apologizing for not seeing him in person. You sent him a quick selfie of you smuggled into your pillow and tried to look somewhat happy. Hoping it'll comfort him.

It wasn't a moment later until you heard a knock at your door. You questioned who it was.

"we're all clean now, meet us in the living room if you want....I made your favourite drink~" Asmo's voice was soft, gentle on your ringing ears.

A small smile appeared on your face. Shuffling out of your room still hugging your pillow, trailing after the lustful demon. Soon enough, you were both entering the living room.

The room was dim, the fireplace being it's only lighting and warming the room up nicely. There must of been something with the wood as it smelled so comforting. The brothers all sat along the sofa, Some on the floor. Everyone had their own drink, blankets and pillows surrounding them.

You curled up in the middle of the sofa, letting yourself be engulfed in multiple hugs. Everyone touching you in some way and you all just sat there. In peaceful silence as you just hugged.

You really needed this....

"thank you for saving me."

"We'll always save you"

"you can always count on us-!"

"I won't let this happen to you again, I promise to protect you better."

"no one is allowed to touch you like that, I won't let them."

"You don't need to thank us, darling."

"I will always make sure you're safe, no Matter what."

"I won't fail you again."

you all hugged each other even tighter, embracing each others comfort and warmth. Tears falling and soothing words shared, each brother did their best to be strong. But even they couldn't stop themselves from shedding tears when the adrenaline died.

They almost lost you. You were kidnapped and hurt because of your connection to them. They were never going to let you get harmed again, no matter the cost.

#obey me #obey me shall we date #gamingclubpresident #aracadejohn217 9 #obey me mammon #obey me mc #obey me asmodeus #obey me satan #obey me belphegor #obey me beelzebub #obey me leviathan #obey me luficer #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me imagine #obey me headcanon #obey me x reader #angst

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iwaasfairy · 3 years

Note

was thinking about this and i know fairy's the biggest iwa fucker ✨

iwa nii having a sleepover with oikawa but you're so used to having him pound you at night, so you do the one thing he hates: you come into his room and give him a little blowie because you just can't stand not having his dick inside you, be it in his mouth or your little pussy

he wakes up by accident, seeing you struggling with your hands and mouth to take him whole, so he decides to help you out by forcing his entire cock inside you, face-fucking you while oikawa is asleep, because the both of you know oikawa is the heaviest sleeper! so iwa nii takes advantage of it and decides to just fuck you on his bed, next to his best friend ;)

i was thinking about this the entire day after i read this, so thank you so much. i love hajime nii giving into his little sister’s antics because he loves her even if he knows he shouldn’t, i love the greedy little sister trope. i love the idea of sucking off iwa so much, goihzdoz pls ♡(ｉДｉ)♡ thank you lovie

tw dubcon, incest, somno, hairpulling, unprotected sex

Maybe it’s a combination of the cold and the loneliness of not being wrapped up in his arms, but there’s no way you’d be able to sleep without it. Not anymore, not after years of getting used to it. The amount of sleep-overs Hajime went on slowly dwindled until the two of you were the only thing you’d think about during the nights, curled up in his arms with his kisses littering your face and his cock pressed deep inside you.

So it’s a little silly, sure, but you can’t help find yourself on your feet, patting down the hall to his room and quickly cracking it open. Most days Hajime nii would slip into yours, but you’ve gotten pretty good at sneaking around yourself.

You quickly shut the door, letting your eyes adjust to the light to watch the two sleeping figures in the middle of the room, both of them separated by enough space to fit a whole other mattress, no doubt your big brother’s doing. You glance down at Oikawa’s peaceful face when you tiptoe past him, before kneeling next to your big brother’s bed and swallowing. Dressed in only his shirt, it’s almost like you’re a conditioned animal at this point. Getting wet just at the idea of being rewarded with your brother’s fat cock inside, you always come so easily when he helps.

Frustratingly though, once he’s asleep there’s very little that’ll wake him. So you bend down to slip the blanket down until his waist and slip under it, watching as your brother shifts a little, eyebrows and pouty mouth relaxed still. “Niichan?” you try once, glancing over your shoulder at Oikawa who doesn’t even move. Good for you that he’s a deep sleeper too. You move his legs a bit wider to comfortably sit between them, before bending and running your hands up along his covered thighs, squeezing softly. You press kisses from his ribs down to his navel and even further, kissing him through his sweats a few times.

But you soon get too impatient to take it slow, and slide your fingers under his pants to shimmy them down his legs. His cock twitches when you place a few kisses on it, licking down to the head and wrapping your lips around it to suck. Haji nii shifts again, letting out a deeper breath, but you keep his legs open enough with your arms and drop some spit onto the growing cock to rub your palm over the head, wetting it more with open mouthed kisses.

He just always feels and tastes so good, you can’t help but want him this bad. No one’s cock could ever compare to your big brother anyway, they couldn’t care about you like he does. You wrap your fingers around him and gently stroke the hardening cock up and down as you moan softly, rubbing your tongue to the base and lower so you can take his balls into your warm mouth to suck. His taste on your tongue is so Hajime, your empty pussy clenching around nothing in anticipation. At this, the brunet rolls his face to the other side, eyebrows twitching.

And you move your hand faster, quickly collecting some of the spit from your mouth to bring it back up to his cock, letting the wet clicking sound fill the room alongside the calm breathing of the two sleeping men. It’s always a struggle to take his thick cock into your mouth entirely, but you’ll never go down without a fight. That’s something he taught you. Your other hand slips between your own legs to toy at your clit, only rubbing it a little as you take Haji nii’s hard cock into your mouth an inch or so further each time, aching for him so hard you almost go lightheaded.

You whimper a muffled version of his name around his cockhead and take him to the back of your mouth again, when he instinctively bucks his hips and makes you gag. But when you pull back his hand slowly moves to your face, trailing his fingers along your cheek, before his eyes slowly open. You pull back to let all the spit mixed with his precum run back down his cock, rhythmically stroking his big cock up and down with two hands now, grinding your thighs together for friction. “Niichan, want you,” you whisper, “so empty. Want your cock inside, please.”

“Ah, ‘mouto,” he groans, “wh—at?”

“Need your cum,” you say, sucking on the flushed head of his hot, glistening cock until he moans louder. He raises himself up on one elbow as he mumbles a few words you don’t catch, before he looks around and notices Oikawa. As if only now realizing the situation, he looks down at you with an expression of stunned shock, then back at Oikawa, then back at your glistening lips and moving hands and your eager licking. His hand suddenly grabs at your hair to pull you off of him.

“What are you doing?” he hisses, glancing back. “Are you stupid?”

“He won’t wake up if you’re quiet, Haji nii,” you sniffle, ignoring his grip on you to crawl into his lap, rubbing your dripping pussy against the underside of his cock. Your hands find his neck, gently sliding up to his ears and back down a few times as you watch him. “Just wanna make love to my niichan.” His eyes visibly soften at that, head tilting back a little when your wetness is rubbed over the head of his hard, thick cock and you lean in more to press a peck to his lips. “Taste you on me?”

Then you kiss him deeply, as he lets go of your hair to shift his hips against your soft cunny, his cock twitching needy and hard between your two bodies. When you pull back he groans, even more when your wet hole is dragged over the fat head of his cock and you push down a little. “You’re a nasty, little girl ever since I taught you how to do all this. So fucking needy all damn night,” he quickly says, looking over at a sleeping Tooru once more. “Fine, lay down then. I gotta make sure you’ll be quiet.”

“I will, Haji nii, promise!” you whisper back, eagerly dropping onto your back and lifting his shirt as you spread your legs for him, hooking them behind his knees when he crawls over you. “Wanna -hm- make you feel good.” He slaps the head of his cock against your clit a few times so you squeak, grabbing onto his arms. He grins a little when placing his fat cock up against you, before grunting when pushing in so slow it makes you whine more, and he has to press a hand over your mouth, middle and ring finger slipping inside to push down on your tongue.

“You’re such a bad liar. Try your best to be fucking quiet.” He presses a small kiss to your temple, as he slides his cock inside you with a stretch that has your eyes watering. When you desperately clench around him, he lifts your thigh towards you. “Shh. I swear it’s like you want Oikawa to find out what a slut you are for your niichan’s cock. Maybe him waking up will make you cum, hm? Should we test that?”

#🍯honey.pot #💫ch.iwaizumi #iwaizumi hajime x reader #tw.incest #tw.dubcon #tw.somno #this is so cute idk #want Hajime nii #🥧iwa.chan

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babyybitchhh · 3 years

Text

Luffy x Reader 18+

Rating: Explicit/R-18+

Words: 1,000

Warnings: I really don't know how else to say this but basically Luffy puts his Gum-Gum abilities to good use by tying his foreskin in a knot so he can keep raw dogging it and (predictably) things don't quite work out

A/N: This idea has been haunting me since I started writing these 1,000 word snippets.

♥♥♥♥

If Luffy were any more insatiable, he’d be humping you into the mattress right about now.

You know he doesn’t mean anything by it - nothing malicious, at any rate. He’s just excited. But you can’t quite shake the feeling of being pinned under a happy, slobbering mutt as you push at him, begging for a moment's pause so you can at least get yourself situated first.

“Luffy, wait - -“

He doesn’t listen, of course, simply far too eager to experience that intoxicating rush of endorphins again. His hands make easy work of spreading your thighs even when you try to keep them closed and you realize you need to get through to him somehow when he impatiently moves to settle between them, already lining himself up.

Impulsively, you fist your hand in the back of his hair and yank. His head comes up with a squawk, fingers scrabbling to latch onto your wrist while you breathe out a stilted sigh of relief. He doesn’t attempt to pry you off though, and you slowly sit up. Using your hold on his head to leverage him back and create more space between your bodies, you drop your gaze to regard the cock straining towards you. With the way it was already excitably leaking again you’d never guess he came just a few moments ago.

In retrospect it had likely been a mistake introducing Luffy to the concept of sex. He had so little self control to begin with, but it was clearly much too late for that now.

“Let go’a me!”

“No. You can’t be trusted down there.”

“Huh?” Heedless to the tug on his hair, he forces his chin down to look at you. “What do you mean?”

You narrow your eyes at him. “I mean you don’t know how to pull out! Last time you said you would but you didn’t.”

Frowning, he puts his head to one side. “What’s wrong with that?”

“Everything! If you keep cumming in me I’ll - -“ Cutting yourself off with a strangled gasp, you let go of him in favor of shyly covering your face. “No, no, that would be bad! We can’t!”

“Come oooonn.” With a pouty whine, Luffy leans into you and presses his puckered lips to the backs of your knuckles. As far as persuasion tactics go, it was frustratingly effective. Dammit.

Slowly, you lower your hands. “You have to pull out, okay?”

“Why?”

A sharp breath. “Because I just - -“

“As long as I don’t let it out inside then it should be fine, right?”

You hesitate at that. “Luffy, do you even - -“

“Sure! I gotta’ make sure you don’t get any in you. Easy.”

Very much doubting that, you watch him lean back and reach down to experimentally tug at his cock with sun kissed fingers. He seems to think about it before apparently having an ‘aha!’ moment, his attention zeroing in on the foreskin instead. You lift a dubious brow at this, but he either doesn’t notice or he doesn’t care. With an alarmingly smooth tug, the excess skin stretches well past the point of normalcy and he makes quick work of trying it into a tight little knot clearly meant to act as a barrier.

If you hadn’t seen it with your own eyes, you never would’ve believed it.

“Hold on a minute - -“

He’s on you in an instant, laughing triumphantly as he shoves you back down on the bed.

Your hands come up in a fluster but before you can protest he gets his hips centered and pushes inside with a quick snap. Eyes jolting in their sockets, you heave a stuttering groan and clutch him to the front of you instead of pushing away as you’d initially intended. True to nature, Luffy wastes no time on build up and he immediately goes in at a quick, breakneck pace that has you completely at the mercy of his plunging cock.

It’s no wonder he cums within minutes going at that speed.

But, to your dazed astonishment, you don’t feel any sticky warmth seeping into you this time. And that’s a good thing, because he barely stops long enough to enjoy the shuddering tremors that wrack through his body before picking right back up again.

Squealing in high pitched pleasure, you glance down at where his pelvis meets yours and a rush of relief floods your cotton stuffed head. No sign of creamy white cum, as far as you could tell. It was a hairbrained idea to use his gum-gum abilities like this but it seemed to be working and thank god for that.

A particularly sharp thrust knocks something inside you and you toss your head back, uninhibited, to groan up at the ceiling. Luffy is all but mindless on top of you, the sharp smack of skin meeting skin highlighting the sensitive grunts and groans that spill from his mouth. It’s so easy to get lost in him like this, all the more so when his relentless rutting eventually shoves you into a quaking orgasm of your own.

But still, he doesn’t stop.

He cums twice more before slowing to a more sedate pace that has you whimpering and whining underneath him. The burning drag of his cock with its fat, swollen tip seems to put just the right amount of pressure on your guts and you keen when he looks down at you, covered in sweat and grinning.

“You like it?”

“I luh - love it, Luffy! Please don’t stop!”

His brow drawn in a determined line, he angles his hips back and slams inside again. You knew he was just doing what he felt naturally inclined to do. The same action had elicited plenty of mewling noises out of you before.

But you feel the pop at the same time he does and you both stare at each other in wide eyed surprise as the combined load of three separate orgasms floods your pussy all at once, absolutely drowning your cervix in it.

He blinks. “Oops …”

#one piece #monkey d. luffy #luffy x reader #self insert bullshit #my writing

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femme-malewife · 3 years

Text

Breaking Down Sia’s Movie

Okay, so I watched Sia’s movie “Music”. And I bear witnessed how awful it truly is. So before I get into this, here’s some warnings:

1. This is going to be a long post

2. There will be mentions of restraint scenes and how they’re handled as well as images. View at your own discretion.

3. There are Spoilers so if for some godforsaken reason you WANT to see this movie...don’t click “keep reading”

Okay, so before I get into the actual contents of the movie let me say the characters all suck. Not a single character was likable and the plot was barely coherent. The main character, Kazu (or just “Zu”) is a recovering alcoholic and she’s just,,, all around not a good person. She’s very irresponsible.

Ebo, her love interest, is also shitty. Not only is his character based on racism to make the white girl look heroic and brave, but he doesn’t actually know how to take care of Music, the autistic girl.

There was also this weird subplot with this fat Asian guy but we’ll get to that later.

And another thing to address there’s like about roughly 10 music videos sprinkled in throughout the movie??? And almost all except ONE of them were extremely bright and colorful and each time I had to keep looking away. Not only that but ALL of the transitions from “reality to music” was always very sudden and has sent me into sensory overload.

And one last thing before we dive into this- Music stims a lot. And yet in her music videos in her mind, she’s not stimming...like, at all. Considering Sia researched with AutismSpeaks, I’m sure she has the idea that stimming is a bad thing.

So the movie begins with Blackface and immediately we jump into extreme bright lights and music. Music wakes up, and we get a feel of her daily routine. Get up, eat eggs, have her hair braided, go on a walk, come home, watch tv, go to bed. (Or at least that’s the generalization of it) And I DO mention this schedule because it’s important later.

As we already know, Music (who is played by Maddie Ziegler, a neurotypical actress) has very exaggerated movements. She has this very weird way of walking and constantly looks like she’s doped up on medications and is high off her ass.

Everyone around her treats her like a toddler, being overly friendly and being all around accepting and caring of her.

Now I bring this up because that in itself is already problematic. It makes neurotypical people think “oh it must be great being autistic people will buy you things, give you free stuff and you’re so unaware!” when this is the furthest thing from reality. If people saw someone like Music out and about, they would be giving her dirty looks, they wouldn’t buy her free things, they’d move away from her.

Autistic people are not that accepted into society. You’re more likely to get cussed out than helped.

So Music returns home, and finds her grandmother, her previous caretaker, dead on the ground. She has no reaction, just smiling and giggling away and sits down.

One thing I noticed about Music is that she’s literally always stimming. Like, LITERALLY always. There is not a single moment on screen where she’s NOT stimming. And that’s not to say it’s bad but it feels way too forced and honestly? It felt and looked more like a mockery of autistic people who need to stim often.

So George, a man next door, came over to help fix something in the apartment. And it was only After he came in that Music got worried about her grandma. Or at least she was lowkey panicking. This is when Zu comes into the movie and gets a call and has to now come take care of Music.

Also apparently the fat Asian neighbor would??? Flash a flashlight in her room while she’s in bed and move it around as if she was some sort of cat??? I’m pretty sure that scene was just an excuse to launch into the second music video of the movie.

So Music wakes up and echoes “Make you eggs” to Zu, who makes her eggs. Remember the routine I mentioned? How Music gets her hair braided as she’s eating? Well, as Zu’s going back to bed, Music starts echoing “Braid your hair”. Zu doesn’t know how.

So Sia incorporated a meltdown scene of Music being stressed of the routine is being broken. Music starts hitting her head and thrashing around screaming “braid your hair” repeatedly. Zu not knowing what to do tries to pin her against the wall and was literally screaming at her to calm down.

And this is where we met Ebo, Zu’s love interest. He noticed Music having a meltdown and...well...

Zu questions if he’s hurting Music and...

And after that, everything is suddenly all perfectly fine because Music understands that Ebo doesn’t want her hurt and she needs to calm down. And it’s also wonderfully okay because he can braid her hair. She goes back to breakfast as if nothing happened.

Obviously this is extremely problematic. Restraining autistics during a meltdown is a very sure way to kill them. If a neurotypical is reading this and is doubtful, here is one instance of an autistic boy being restrained and killed.

After that, Zu and Ebo follow Music on her walk to get to know her route. After returning, Zu makes a comment about how she’s thinking about sending Music to a “people pound” and then adds “oh but I guess I can keep her”??? Honestly if you took this scene out of context I’d be wondering if they were actually talking about a fucking animal.

Zu later finds some of her old toys and talks to Music about them and mentions how someone “has seizures just like Music”.

Um...when did Music have seizures? This was NEVER brought up prior to this and it will never be mentioned throughout the movie. A meltdown! Is not! A seizure!!

The movie follows Zu around being irresponsible, borrowing money, and so forth.

And then we get to the park scene. Hey remember the first meltdown scene? Music had a meltdown about her routine being broken? Yeah that doesn’t happen. Zu flat out says that the change of route is good for her and Music just happily goes along with it with that dopey ass expression on her face.

Ebo explains that Music wears her headphones “because her hearing is so sensitive she can hear whispering from two rooms away”. First of all, we autistic people are NOT superhuman.

After he says that he says “she can understand everything we are saying” and yet they literally have to repeat themselves several times to get her to understand. They don’t treat her like she understands them. They treat her like a two year old who doesn’t know any better. That was literally the vibe I got throughout the entire movie, especially at some later scenes.

So Music sees some kids running around and that sends her into a meltdown. And Zu wants Ebo to restrain her like he did at the apartment and...um.

Ooooooookayyyyyy. Yeah, that’s your problem??? Okay make the tall white girl be a “hero” then.

Oh yeah just like that!

Also what the fuck is Music’s expression here??? This is a normal look for her throughout the movie and she’s having a Meltdown.

Oh and after Music “calms down” from the meltdown??? She’s back to being 100% PERFECTLY HAPPY.

AGAIN, NEUROTYPICALS, DO NOT THINK THIS IS OKAY!!!!! NONE OF US ARE LIKE THAT!!! IF YOU RESTRAIN AN AUTISTIC YOU WILL MAKE THEM PANIC MORE AND POSSIBLY KILL THEM!!!

So, we keep going on with the movie, following Zu continuing to be irresponsible and frustratingly impossible to care about.

And at one point, she has to bring Music with her to this place where she “works”. And on the way there she tells Music to “not do one of her freakouts and just get it out now”.

Um...so sorry that a meltdown is causing YOU trouble??? A MELTDOWN IS NOT A FUCKING TANTRUM!!!!!!!!!

Later, when walking, Music wanted a snowcone, so Zu got her one. While she was getting her one, Music, QUITE LITERALLY OUT OF NOWHERE, lays on the ground under the bench and starts to eat gum from it.

...Um. What??? Why??? To show us how “hard” it is being with an autistic girl??? Literally what was the point of this scene???

So, afterwards, Music gets stung by a bee, which she’s allergic to. Zu restrained her while she was screaming, though it was brief, it was still uncomfortable. She gets brought to the hospital and she’s gonna be okay because she had an EpiPen with her.

But the doctors say that Zu’s occupation is empty for the insurance.

And here’s where I got from pissed and annoyed to downright uncomfortable.

Zu realizes her bag is missing and for several minutes, she literally starts screaming in pure anger and frustration, at home she’s searching, throwing things, kicking things, screaming some more...

Like WHY isn’t ZU being restrained??? Why is it acceptable for her to do that but it’s bad for Music to have a meltdown??? Honestly when Zu started screaming and throwing things, I actually flinched.

Oh also during these scenes the fat Asian kid was taking Ebo’s boxing class and hugged his opponent during a match and I guess at his apartment his parents argued about that (they didn’t include subtitles on that bit as they were speaking another language....nice. Note the sarcasm.)

and the dad literally attacks his wife and throws his son aside...and the fat Asian kid dies.

So like...what was the point of the kid dude??? No, seriously, what was the point? To buy Music a watermelon pop at the start of the movie??? We didn’t get ANY information about him or ANYTHING. And he just up and dies. Like if you take all his scenes out of the movie, nothing would change.

While the kid’s dying, Zu’s so stressed that she gets drunk and tries to talk to Ebo, but she gets loud and emotional and a neighbor comes out and Zu drunkenly attacks him.

Oh, so even if Zu is drunk and attacking people, pushing them, etc, SHE doesn’t get restrained. She just gets told stop. Okay. Sure.

Zu goes to a bar, returns home after another annoying music number, and makes Music her breakfast before she goes on her walk.

Ebo visits, and he practically says “aight I’mma focus on my own health I’m out”.

Zu starts becoming actually clean after that, she and Music staying with George.

There was pretty much just a dumb montage of her life after that??? One bit was Music having ANOTHER meltdown (for unexplained reasons) and Zu grabbing her yelling to calm down.

After some time Zu decides to drop Music off at a mental health facility, and when they were there, Music suddenly starts saying “don’t go sis” and “sit down now”.

Hold up.

So this movie is telling me that Music is nonverbal, but she can say some phrases, and also she understands what’s going on and YET NO ONE IN THIS ENTIRE MOVIE HAS TREATED HER LIKE SHE’S A HUMAN BEING WHO KNOWS WHAT’S GOING ON...suddenly, out of nowhere, she knows what’s going on. She suddenly knows she’s about to be left alone and suddenly she can talk more than repeated phrases.

I...I don’t think that’s how that works there, chief!

Zu changes her mind and she and Music go to the wedding that Ebo is at. Ebo is a guest at his brother and ex-wife’s wedding. (Which he mentioned earlier in the film and said he’ll tell Zu the rest of his story later which he never does btw)

and while he’s on stage finishing his speech, which is about how he doesn’t know what love is, Zu and Music come running in and Zu goes up on stage and basically tells him she’s now clean and she’s learning to love. And suddenly Ebo’s in love with Zu and introduces her to his entire family at the wedding, share a kiss and then everyone started clapping.

...No, I’m not kidding. Everyone was applauding them. At his brother’s wedding.

They start to play a song, but then Music starts kinda quietly kinda brokenly singing, it was hard to hear but yeah.

And then it cuts to another bright music video and the movie THANKFULLY ENDS.

GOD. That was so frustrating to watch.

I hated the characters, I hated the plot, I hated how Sia chose to “represent” autistic people, it was all a one, big, irritating MESS.

And in the end, do we learn ANYTHING about autism??? NO.

In fact, if I was a neurotypical with NO knowledge of autism, I would assume autism makes you some stupid 2 year old that you need to restrain when they’re stressed.

I wish I was kidding.

Just because some autistics are incapable of fully taking care of themselves doesn’t mean they’re just “teehee brain empty everyone around me is in a super bright music video!” like what the fuck???

This movie was problemtic, offensive, and WHY is it titled “MUSIC” when literally Zu is the protagonist??? Zu is the protagonist, her main story is about her and Ebo falling in love, and her subplot was...taking care of Music.

And then the mini subplots of the movie too. I genuinely don’t understand the point of the Asian kid. And Once, Ebo mentioned needing medication but they never bring THAT up again either.

Even if you erased Music’s character entirely in this movie and it wasn’t about a recovering alcoholic taking care of her autistic sister, the movie would be trash, poorly made, poorly executed, poorly directed.

And, the site I used did NOT add any warnings about restraint NOR did it say “hey don’t restrain autistics in a meltdown” or anything. And considering this movie had 4 RESTRAINT SCENES (2 of them being fleshed out and the others being quicker)...that’s pretty bad.

All around, this movie was awful.

-50/10, I would sooner watch 2019′s Cats.

#actually autistic #neurodivergent #sia music #anti sia #sia movie #a full breakdown of the movie #autistic meltdown #mentions of restraint #images of restraint

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thoseofgreatambition · 4 years

Text

duet | {im}mature

description: you were supposed to be fred’s best friend. but you sure weren’t acting like it.

a/n: this broke my heart to write, but i think a bit from fred’s perspective would be wonderful. again this is the wonderful wonderful story i am writing with @ickle-ronniekins and you have to follow her, i honestly owe so much to her because this is something i’ve always wanted to do and haven’t had the chance yet.

DUET MASTERLIST

warnings: swearing, blood

wordcount: 5K

taglist: @highly-acidic @feffffffy @sweetpeastrigger @stuckindilemma @georgeweasleyx @seppys-return-to-madness @fopdoodledane @fredd-weasley @iprobablyshipit91 @darling-details @laneygthememequeen @lupinsx @keoghans @helloallthethingsilove @waschbiber @dreamer821 @feffffffy @the-hufflepuff-of-221b @62442-am @wtfweasleyy @obsessedwithrandomthings @sleep-i-ness @shadowsinger11 @harrysweasleys @shadychaoticcollection @haphazardhufflepuff @afriendlyneighborhoodhufflepuff @hood-and-horan @geeksareunique @insearchofnewdreams @notstandingstill-imlyinginwait @lumos-barnes @thatfuckingliardavidtennant @slytherinqween @xinyourdreamsx @skiving-snackboxess @wildfire-whizbangs @dwarfwizard-from-panem @diary-of-an-onliner @answer-the-sirens @woakiees @black-widow-fangirl @theheirofnightandday @summerstardust @whysoseriouspadfoot @chocok22 @myhopesareanchoredinyou @siriusblackisme @illusivedaydreamer @zeeneee @writingwitchly @wolfpotter12 @obsessedwithrandomthings @carolinesbookworld @shadowsinger11 @pit-and-the-pen @summer-writes @peachesandpinks @gweaslvy @alpinewinchester @letsfightsomeorcs @theweasleysredhair @purpleskiesstorm @hxfflxpxffs @wand3ringr0s3 @finecole @angelinathebook @highly-acidic @90shermione @zreads @susceptible-but-siriusexual

no smut taglist: @parker-potters

Fred adored you. Truly. You were his closest friend, aside from George. The little Hufflepuff with the ribbons who’d shouted him down after a prank only four short years ago. The one who truly would tell him what you thought of his pranks.

Perhaps that was a lie, but he liked your opinion more than most others.

He often didn’t want to hear it, but that's beside the point.

Now though? Now he wanted your opinion. His mother told him once long ago that the reason he got into such intense arguments was that he poked and prodded others until they told him what he thought was wrong, and then he would pounce.

What utter rubbish, Fred thought as he stared you down from across the D.A. Room. All he wanted to know was why you were so against his suggestion that you come with them when they leave Hogwarts.

Very simple.

Not to mention how annoying it was that you were paired with Longbottom. All he ever heard was George prattling on about how much he missed spending time with you. If Neville weren’t careful he would catch the bad end of a Nosebleed Nougat.

You for your part, seemed to be returning his gaze with an equal amount of fervor. In between longing glances at George.

If Fred weren’t such a firm believer in keeping promises, he would have locked the two of you in a cupboard long ago to shag it out.

Alas, he was frustratingly loyal.

What a terrible flaw to have.

It was towards the end of the meeting, when you looked near tears of frustration of being unable to figure out the expelliarmus charm, and George was fawning over you that he approached. Even Harry had left.

“Y/N.”

George shot Fred a warning look, a look that said ‘if you pick a fight I’ll knock you out’.

Fred hadn’t been knocked out by George yet.

It was like an itch he couldn’t help but scratch. Fred wouldn’t admit it, even if there was a wand pointed to his jugular, but he was every inch as self conscious as George. Perhaps even more. People who knew them always talked about how confident Fred was and how smart George was. How his twin had the more mature personality.

Perhaps it was true, but the thought that he was missing out on something that others might have noticed dug underneath his skin and clawed against his skull.

You took in a shaky breath.

Fat tears on your cheek. Fred let out a grunt. He could be emotionally mature. He could be the more mature one. More mature than George obviously-- he could state things in a clear way, and even wait to say them.

He could do it.

This was a time to wait. “You want to be a healer right? No one’s going to come at you as a healer. Let’s go get you to the kitchens then to your dorm.”

The little smile you gave eased his heart a bit.

He’d always been uncomfortable when you’d cried.

You were mad. He could tell. You were mad at George, Fred knew it like he knew Quidditch formations. You always got weird and pouty when you sat on the other side of the Great Hall. You could have asked to sit over with them. It was the weekend. Life was boring without a bit of risk. But you took your seat at the Hufflepuff table and kept looking back over at George.

Fred wasn’t able to hang out with you either. Every free moment you chased after his twin.

You were supposed to be his best friend too.

You were a prat sometimes. And you were too wrapped up in your ‘unrequited’ love to notice it.

With a huff, Fred followed you out of the hall as you tried to escape. Presumably to cry in your dorm room again instead of coming over to speak with them.

Madness! What was George going to do, push you away?

And even if George didn’t want to talk-- which he always did-- you could have been speaking to him.

What had happened to best friends?

“Oi!” his voice was loud in the corridor, with his large frame and fiery hair it was easy for you to locate the sound. “Why are you running out without talking to us?”

He meant ‘me’, but that was too messy.

You frowned up at Fred, lip wobbling, eyes wet. It was hard to be intimidated by someone who looked like they were about to cry. “You seemed plenty busy, Fred.” When you turned on your heel and tried to stomp off, Fred followed you.

Followed you through empty corridors, easily outpacing you.

“Why won’t you come with us? Why aren’t you spending time with us?”

“Why aren’t you two spending time with me then?” Your voice sounded like he’d brought sandpaper to an exposed nerve.

“No! Stop turning it around! I have to listen to George pouting every day--” Of course talk of him is what gets you to soften. “Will you fucking stop with that!? Acting like your world revolves around him? If it did you’d come with us--”

“I can’t come with you, I need to finish my schooling! Some of us are studying for a job that requires a complete education, Frederick! Not all of us can just run off without thinking--”

There it was.

“And our plan is bad because it doesn’t need us finishing up here?”

“Will you shut up Fred? You’re taking words out of my mouth!”

“Then say your bloody words!”

Later on, Fred would be thankful that you two were in a relatively private location.

“IT’S NOT MY JOB TO COME WITH YOU, ALRIGHT? I’M ALLOWED TO BE UPSET YOU TWO ARE LEAVING!”

“IF YOU WERE OUR FRIEND YOU’D BE HAPPY FOR US--”

“SOME OF US ARE EMOTIONALLY MATURE ENOUGH TO FEEL MORE THAN ONE THING AT ONCE, FREDERICK.”

Fred felt himself pale, and pressed on despite George making his way over.

“Nice enough of you to call me emotionally immature. At least I can say what’s on my mind.”

Now you look every bit as hurt as he was. Good. Though, he had to admit, you looked much more intimidating now that you were getting truly angry.

“Shut up Fred. The only reason you’re picking fights right now is because you’re scared about leaving!”

“I’M NOT SCARED!” Fred’s voice bellowed and echoed down the hall. He shrugged off George’s hand on his shoulder.

“You are! You’re scared and confused and nervous, you’re just too fucking proud to admit that you might actually care about the risk you’re taking!”

“Will you two fucking settle down?!” Like always, George was trying to be the voice of reason. The mature one.

What horseshit. And he couldn’t even go let off steam at practice.

“Why should I calm down-- he’s the one who came over picking a fight!”

“You’re the one pouting like a fucking five year old, aren’t you? Why don’t you tell George then why you won’t go with us? Been making him upset too but you’re too busy thinking about yourself--”

You looked like you might cry again, though more than that you looked like you might smack Fred. “I shouldn’t have to explain why I need to stay here to be a healer! If you had any fucking sense of empathy you’d understand--”

“Hey!” This time, George stepped between the two of you. Apparently, hearing George bellow was enough to stun you both enough to stop shouting for a bit. “Go walk it off, Y/N.”

You gave George a look that Fred knew would bring his brother near tears later. George seemed near tears more than usual these days.

It only made Fred want to argue with you more. You were so determined to deny that George obviously couldn’t love you, that you rejected the notion that he might be just as sensitive as you were about some of these things. You rationalized his tears and fears so far away from yourself that any guilt on your part seemed absolved.

Fred opened his mouth to get the last word in, but stopped when he felt a rather rough grip on his shirt from his brother. He used his forearm and pushed him away. “Don’t touch me mate. I’m allowed to get mad at her.” You were far enough away that he could speak at least part of his mind. “Just because you like her doesn’t mean I’m not allowed to get mad at her. She’s my friend too. She’s been a prat, and she hasn’t been supportive enough even though she was one of the first people you told!”

“She’s upset!”

“SO? We all are! She doesn’t support us. And I’m not going to spend the rest of the year watching her feel sorry for herself about it. I’m sick of watching you pine over someone who’s too stubborn to even try to talk to us in the hall.”

Fred shoved past his brother and bit down his tears. He was mature. He didn’t spill either of your secrets. That was mature. Keeping secrets even when you were mad at the other person was mature. He knew that.

Something hot and wet was falling down his face. It must have been raining, he thought, as he walked blindly outside into the autumn night. It rained often in Scotland. People were often so focused on the fact that he and George were twins that they forgot that Fred was exactly in the middle of the rest of the Weasley children.

George complained to him once about not feeling like an individual, and like a good big brother, like someone mature, he bit his tongue and listened to his twin’s feelings.

Of course he knew what it was like to play second fiddle. He got labeled as the ‘mean’ twin. The rude one. The hot headed one. There was truth in that, and Fred wouldn’t deny it, but it stung still. You’d been nice about it though. You’d called him bold. Knew him apart immediately. Sanded down his edges over the years.

You’d called him your best friend last year. Laughed when he’d asked about George. Said you were always too nervous to tell George what was exactly on your mind. It was always so easy to talk to him you’d said.

So why wouldn’t you talk to him anymore? If you were supposed to be his best friend, why weren’t you trying to spend time with him?

Fred coughed into his sleeve as he finally ran out of breath. Eyes swollen. You were supposed to be his best friend too. You were supposed to prioritize him too. He was angry too about being kicked off the team.

He wasn’t scared. This was going to be an adventure. Fred landed himself onto the grass, shoulders shaking. If he could shout, he would. But instead his teeth seemed to lock together.

Fred Weasley didn’t get scared. The late nights he spent working on things where his heart wouldn’t stop pounding against his chest wasn’t fear. It was excitement, obviously. He wasn’t scared. He wasn’t scared reading about more muggle attacks. He didn’t get scared remembering that you and so many other of his friends were muggleborns.

He certainly hadn’t panicked realizing what could happen to you and your family when you’d joined the D.A.

Fred Weasley didn’t get scared.

He didn’t cry either. His face was red as he rubbed his sleeve rather roughly against his eyes. The rain had gotten in them, clearly.

He would show you. He’d show you he wasn’t scared. He’d show you that he was mature. He’d show everyone that this was a great idea, and he’d been smart convincing George to do it.

Far off in the distance, a few first years were chatting amongst themselves, wondering why one of the Weasley twins was sitting alone in the grass, rubbing his eyes so harshly on such a perfectly clear night.

George was sad. Fred didn’t like it when his twin was sad. It crawled under his skin. It scratched at his bones.

Fred knew why his twin was sad, and it made him even more uncomfortable.

You were also upset. Something that shouldn’t have bothered Fred as much as it did, seeing as the two of you were arguing at the moment.

That didn’t matter though. Everything would be alright obviously-- he was the strong twin. He didn’t get sad like George did. He wasn’t going to be the type to lose his mind over someone not spending time with him, obviously.

He would never make George admit it, but the younger of the two of them had always leaned a bit towards anxious tendencies.

It was Fred’s job to keep himself strong so that George didn’t have to worry about things.

Thinking about you again made him rankled.

If you would just stop ignoring them, everything would get better. He couldn’t make you come with them-- and deep inside his gut Fred understood why you wouldn’t come, but if you would put everything aside everything would get better.

George was shaking his head when Fred asked if he was going to come to breakfast. “Don’t feel well?”

“It’s my stomach.”

Fred frowned at his brother. If he were the type to be honest with himself, he would admit that he was making things worse for his brother.

“Stay in bed then. Umbridge will only make things worse for you.”

Perhaps he could have been more comforting.

Perhaps he could have been better at explaining things.

Perhaps Fred shouldn’t have argued with George after his argument with you.

Perhaps Fred wanted someone to scrutinize his emotions like people scrutinized George’s.

Perhaps that was a silly thought. Fred Weasley didn’t get sad, after all.

When it was the three of you in detention it was easy to laugh it all off. Sure, writing in your own blood hurt, but you could all laugh it off imagining what may happen if you’d misspelled a word.

It was an awful experience, but it was easier to forget when it was the three of you.

Now though?

“Keep writing, Weasley.”

Fred wondered if he would be able to knock the lights out of Nott before anyone could stop him.

Being expelled wouldn’t be the worst thing--

Unless they snapped his wand.

For the moment though, Fred settled on a glare before staring back down at the parchment in front of him.

Just a little while longer.

I must act my age.

Malfoy sneered at him from across the room, no doubt excited to have some sort of revenge from the beat down he’d gotten just a few weeks prior. “Yes, come on then George. Or are you illiterate?”

Fred was about to open his mouth to make a crack, but you seemed to beat him to it. “That’s Fred.”

You’d never spoken in detention before. Malfoy strode over to your desk, and you met his stare with another one, “What was that?” Astonished, Fred watched you rise to your feet, eye to eye with Malfoy who seemed to flinch and step back. “I said that’s Fred. If we’re here for detention, perhaps you’re here for a remedial lesson then since you can’t seem to understand two word sentences. Don’t get cocky Malfoy.”

“You’re the one who’s being cocky if you can’t even duel.”

“Clearly I don’t need to duel you to send you off crying to the hospital wing.”

“Miss Y/L/N!” Umbridge’s voice was shrill from her desk. “Another week of detention for threatening another student.”

Instinctively, Fred grabbed his bag when the timer went off, ready to grab your sleeve and pull you out. Unfortunately it seemed Umbridge had another plan.

“Miss Y/L/N. You’ll be staying behind. I need another twenty lines from you.”

You shot Fred a look, as if you were reading his mind. Rarely could he read someone as well as he could read George.

This was simple though.

Get going.

Fred knew your footsteps. He’d memorized them over the years. When he heard you walk by the statue he was hiding behind, he stepped out just enough for you to see him. “You didn’t have to do that.”

You frowned at him, “I did. He called you illiterate.”

Ah yes. Hufflepuff loyalty.

Hufflepuff stubbornness.

You two continued to stare each other down before finally Fred spoke again. “Your hand is bleeding.”

“Stunning observation there.”

With a scowl, he gestured for you to follow him behind the statue and down one of the hidden passages. “Let me clean it up for you at least.”

You sat down on the cold stone floor once the two of you were far enough away to be heard, and continued to glower at him as he sat across from you.

Fred kept your gaze inch for inch.

“You’re being awful nice for someone who saw fit to yell at me for being shy.”

“If you think that’s why I’m upset you’re just as thick as I thought.”

Fred kept the edge in his voice, but he kept his touch gentle as he dabbed the blood off your hand.

“How am I supposed to spend time with you two when you’re constantly busy with other people--”

“You just come over!” Fred’s voice echoed throughout the passage, louder than he’d intended. However, he was on a roll. “You’ve been our friend for years, you already know our friends because they’re your friends too, you spent the fucking summer with us! You just come and sit down, but you’re too fucking set on George coming over to do that aren’t you? You’ve always got that love story stuck in your head. Can’t see past it far enough to think about your other friends.”

“What the hell’s that supposed to mean? I spend plenty of time with my friends!”

“Do you?”

The lack of comprehension on your face was frustratingly astounding. Biting back the urge to start screaming like he’d been doing into his pillow the past few nights, Fred allowed his voice to sound as bitter as he wanted as he rubbed a salve onto your hand. “We hardly ever see you! Just have to watch you stare at us from across the hall. Do you think I don’t notice? It’s obvious what you think, that you’re wishing someone will come over and tell you it’s alright. You’re not the only nervous one you know! You’re not the only one who gets scared or anxious-- have you thought about that? Getting so upset when I offered you to come with us-- you could have just said no!”

“I did say no!”

“You got so defensive-- like we were attacking you! You’re a muggleborn, I wanted you out of here before things got nasty! Making it sound like a terrible idea-- for every Malfoy that says those terrible words to your face, there’s a dozen others who are too cowardly to. But now Voldemort’s back! Can’t believe you want to stay here where it’s so dangerous. Your career isn't everything! Being a healer can wait!”

You were curiously silent, and if Fred were to snap out of his heated rant he would have noticed the odd expression on your face.

“That’s another thing, Y/N! You’re always so caught on George! He’s not the whole world you know-- do you know what it’s like to hardly see your closest friend, and when you do see them alone they just talk about their crush? It’s bloody annoying! Makes you feel like you’re not a priority! Or hearing that your idea to leave is a bad one when you’re just trying to be brave--” Fred’s voice felt thick, his vision became blurry with tears but he continued. “I am brave! And just because I’m not George doesn’t mean I don’t get scared or sad-- Everyone always prattles on about how he’s feeling, I don’t feel wonderful all the time either! But I have to keep pushing on, like nothing is bothering me! Because this was all my fucking plan, and if I don’t push on all this work will have been for nothing!”

Fred forgot sometimes, that you could read him better than you could read George. “I’ve made you feel looked over, haven’t I? Is that what it is Freddie?”

He wasn’t supposed to cry. So why was he crying? “You have! You said I was your best friend, and then you just start ignoring me--”

It was a strange hug that you wrapped him in. He had to crouch down on his knees to be properly held in your arms, but it didn’t stop him from crying into your shoulder as he continued to rant and rave. It wasn’t until his throat ached from speaking that he noticed you rubbing circles into his back or your hand in his hair.

He was brought back to many years before, how it felt to be wrapped in his mother’s arms after a long tantrum.

“I’m sorry Fred.”

He pulled away, sitting on his heels and watched you rub your own teary eyes. “I should have thought more about how you felt. You’re right.”

“Why won’t you just come over to be near us?”

“I was scared you two might not want me there. You always look like you’re having so much fun.”

His brow furrowed, what a silly reason. It hardly made any sense. “You’ve known us for years. You spent the summer with us. Why wouldn’t we want you there?”

You gave him a very halfhearted shrug, giving the impression of someone who didn’t quite understand themselves. “Don’t know. Since all of this has started… haven’t quite felt myself. I’ve been burying myself in studying. Trying not to think of much.” you looked as if you were willing yourself up to say something. “Was that why you invited me then? Because you were worried about me?”

“Someone’s got to-- you can’t even manage a simple disarming spell.”

Thankfully, you had the grace to laugh at that, even with tears in the corner of your eyes. “That’s mean!”

“It’s not mean if it’s true.”

“I want to be a healer. I’m not leaving early. I’m bad at fighting, but I’m good at healing. So I’ll be doing that during the war. I know you’ll do something silly and get your ear blasted off. Someone’s going to need to know how to patch it back on.”

“I’m the smart twin. That’ll be George who does something that stupid.”

You waved your hand as if it were all unimportant. “My point stands. I’m not afraid of Malfoy. I’m staying here and finishing up my education and I’m going to do well on my NEWTS so I can get into a good program.”

“I don’t want you to get hurt.”

Again, you shrugged. “Can’t just let you two try to beat up everyone for me.” With a half smile as you wiped away your tears with your sleeve, “And I reckon I made you feel bad about your choice?”

Fred hardly needed to nod as he shifted himself to sit beside you, arm squished against arm as you both leant back on the cold stone wall. “Didn’t make me feel good about convincing George to leave early.”

“Ah. I should have known it was your idea.” There was a silence, as you took his hand in yours and tapped your fingers against his palm. “I do support you, you know. And I know your ideas and marketing will do well.”

It was nice to hear you mention the marketing-- it’d been Fred drafting up the ideas for it. George tended to be the one to work out the specifics.

“I just get sad thinking about being apart from both of you. And I could have said that better.”

“We’ll miss you too, you know.”

“Even if I’ve made you sad?”

“Yeah. It’ll be hard for me to make you feel guilty about that if you’re all the way here in Hogwarts.”

When you pinched his hand, Fred let out a loud laugh.

“I could have said this all better. I’m sorry.” He chewed on the inside of his cheek. “It’s hard to talk about this stuff.”

“It’s difficult to open up when we’re scared.”

You read him too well.

You knew that he did get scared, every once in a while.

Even if he’d never admit it.

It was Fred who woke up first, shivering with an ache in his throat and his head with a rather harsh nudge to his thigh.

“Why are you two in here?”

He would have known that irritated voice anywhere.

“Morning Georgie.”

Fred sat up, and realized he’d fallen asleep using your forearm as a pillow.

“Answer my question.”

Fairly certain he had a fever, Fred looked up at his twin. “Clearly we had a passionate night of lovemaking, as evidenced by us both being fully clothed.” When George continued to scowl down at him, Fred let out a shrug and a cough, “Talked. Patched things up. Fell asleep.”

George used the back of his hand to test the temperature of Fred’s forehead. “You’ve got a fever.”

“Thank you Healer George.”

“Oh shut up. I was worried about you.”

“How’d you find us?”

“Borrowed the map from Harry.”

You finally began to stir, shivering just as much as Fred had been.

Sleeping in a cold tunnel towards the end of fall truly was a horrible idea.

“Why’s my arm asleep?” when you noticed George, you frowned a bit, “Why’re you here?”

“He came looking for us. He’s jealous I got to spend the night alone with you because of our torrid love affair, and that’s something he wants instead.”

Like always, the comment seemed to fly over your head. “We don’t have one of those.”

“Don’t hide our love, Y/N.”

George rolled his eyes, and offered his hand to help you stand. “You two are hopeless. Let’s get you to the hospital wing.”

“Not going to help up your brother?” Fred chuckled as he watched George put his coat over your shoulders before helping up Fred and wrapping his scarf around his brother’s neck. While he was sliding mittens onto his brother’s hands he shook his head.

“Just glad you two aren’t fighting anymore. Thought I was going to have a heart attack from the stress.”

“Sorry Georgie.” both you and Fred spoke at the same time, resulting in an amused smile from George.

“Hopeless. Just like I said.” with that, he slung an arm over Fred and wrapped his other around your waist. “C’mon. Now you both get to spend Saturday sick in bed. Terrible judgement, you two.”

Fred grinned as you let out a tired laugh.

Things felt a bit closer to normal.

#george weasley #george weasley oneshot #george weasley imagine #george weasley x reader #george weasley fanfiction #george weasley fanfic #fic: duet #my writing

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lettersnorth · 3 years

Text

Prompt #1: Foster

“Go again.”

The youth looked down at the paltry pile of pebbles on his side of the dusty cavern floor and furrowed his brow in consideration.

His opponent, also stuck straddling that awkward line between boy and man, held out something enclosed in the shell of his cupped hands and waited. And waited. This far beneath Ala Mhigo the tunnels were deathly silent. Deeper in there lay a trail of torches to light the way but here there was only the flickering lantern light between them. The shadows along the walls jumped every time the candle flame spit.

“Gods’ blood, Connor! Go!” Rundulf finally exploded. The sound of his exasperation bounced off the walls of the catacombs that ran like a rabbit’s warren beneath the city.

When the Garlean Empire had finally moved in over the tattered remnants of the beleaguered city-state, the Imperial army had sealed the tombs, the last resting place of Ala Mhigan dead. To keep out the ‘rabble rousers’. It might have worked if the Empire had found and sealed all the entrances. But they had failed to understand what a labyrinth they had on their hands. Miles of tunnels going back hundreds of years. It was all too easy for an intrepid Resistance to make camp within a few long forgotten spaces. A secure place for seditious talk.

“Don’t rush me.”

Or, an idle argument between two bored adolescents attempting to stay alert with nothing but stone and dust around them.

“Pick a bleedin’ number or I swear to Rhalgr I’ll --”

“Three high.”

Rundulf grunted and opened his hands, sending a cascade of flat stones clattering to the dirt. The boys leaned over the stones, peering in the dim lantern light to see which ones had landed with their white painted faces up, if any.

Alas, only two displayed their pale faces.

“Ha! That’s another for me!” Rundulf crowed, a fist punching up into the darkness.

Shaking his head, Connor flicked a pebble from his ever-dwindling pile towards Rundulf’s own. “Gods, I hate this game. Can’t we do somethin’ else?”

Just then, beyond the lantern’s reach came the soft sound of a throat being intentionally cleared. And the game was suddenly and hastily forgotten. With eyes wide with surprise, Connor grabbed the lantern and swung it in the direction of the noise as Rundulf surged to his feet, ready for a fight.

The swinging lantern light fell on one slight and slender girl and both boys visibly relaxed. Aislinn was nearly half their size, a spindly collection of knees and elbows destined to forever be the runt among them. The antithesis of a threat.

“What’re you doin’ down here, North?” Connor sighed, lowering the light.

“Lookin’ for da.” she said simply as she made to pass them, only to have Rundulf block the way.

“You know he’s with the others. Plannin’ out next steps. He’ll be up when they’re done.”

“I didn’t know that.”

Connor laughed as he knelt down and collected the stones again in preparation for another round. “Not sure you were supposed to either. Good job, Rundulf.”

The larger boy, realizing his mistake, merely folded his arms across his chest and grunted. The less he said, the better.

“Sit and play a few rounds, Aislinn. They should be heading up soon.” Connor said, clattering the stones in his hands.

She studied him for a long moment and then wordlessly shook her head. The catacombs were as dark and foreboding as she remembered. It was bad enough that she had ventured this far on her own. When they were children she had been forced to spend a night down in this place, sharing a sarcophagus with a moldering skeleton. A fact he should have remembered just as well as her. She had no intention of staying and ending up the subject of another cruel child’s prank.

“What’re they discussing?” she asked instead.

Rundulf sullenly shrugged and broke his silence. “Probably tryin’ to figure out a abetter way to get information out to the other cells. Last two runs didn’t go so well.”

Aislinn peered down the tunnel. “They aren’t choosin’ the right people.”

“Says you.” Connor snorted.

“I do.” she replied, turning that unerring gaze back on him. It was unsettling. The way she spoke so flat. She was too serious by half. It was too old an expression set in too young a face and it crawled under his skin. A part of him was almost certain she knew it too.

“Suppose you know who they should send.”

She jutted her chin up. “I could do it.”

Rundulf’s guffaw echoed off the stone. “Don’t think they’re that desperate yet.”

“I just caught you two unaware. And you’re supposed to be on watch. I coulda snuck right past and you’d have kept playin’ your game.” she countered.

Rundulf opened his mouth to reply but Connor held up a quelling hand. “We’re flattered, Aislinn but we ain’t exactly Imperial patrols now, are we? Those runs are serious. You need your wits about you the entire time.”

“Are you explainin’ a run to me like I haven’t been here just as long as you?” Aislinn asked, her question more of a barbed statement than anything.

Her tone must have gotten through, for in the lantern light she could see the tips of Connor’s ears go red with embarrassment.

“Clearly someone needs to. Your da is never goin’ to let you go. No matter how much you keep harpin’ on him. It’s gettin’ pathetic.”

Aislinn blinked at him. The only sign that his words had struck true. He regretted them the moment they were out of his mouth. He was forever doing the wrong thing when it came to her. Forever the arse.

Wordlessly, she turned and retreated out of reach of the lantern light, back the way she had come. He groaned under his breath and hung his head.

“Look, maybe it needed to be said.” Rundulf said, returning to his side of the makeshift playing field.

“Shut up.”

“Coulda let someone else do it though.”

“Shut up.”

“Fine. Go again.”

With an air of resignation Connor held the stones out over the floor when there came the sudden sound of swift steps hitting the dirt. Once again Connor and Rundulf sprung up but Aislinn was quicker. One stride, two, a dodge to the left, a duck under Rundulf’s swinging arm and she breezed past them, down the corridor towards the meeting of generals.

“Gods damn it!”

She heard them giving chase and almost laughed. In a world where it seemed everyone was bigger and stronger, Aislinn had learned to be faster. They would never win in a race against her. She sailed down the torchlit passage with an elated sort of satisfaction.

The three careened around the bend, Aislinn remaining just frustratingly out of reach until they burst into the large burial chamber at the end of the tunnel. The men and women gathered within turned in haste towards the interruption. The slithering sound of several swords leaving their scabbards drew Aislinn up short with Rundulf and Connor stumbling behind her in their effort not to bowl her over.

“Hold.”

“It’s just a couple of young ones.”

“Bloody hells, aren’t those th’ ones you put on watch, Jorund? Fat lot o’ good it did.”

Winded, her wide eyes took in the gathering amidst the flickering torchlight and for a sparse moment she regretted the impulse that had driven her here. No. A small voice inside refused to let her back down. She was tired of sitting on the side lines. Tired of watching the others do their part while hers seemed to always be to sit at home and anxiously wait for their return. Passed over time and again. She could do something. She could be useful. Why couldn’t anyone see that?

“I can do it.” she said, hating the way her voice sounded so small in the cavernous chamber. She shook her head and tried again. “I can do it. I can make the run.”

“Aislinn?” her father’s voice rumbled the way it always did but in this space it seemed to reverberate. He was a wall of a man and he didn’t so much push through the others as much as they parted for him. Thick arms folded across the barrel of his chest as he stared down at her. Looking into his storming eyes she knew there would be a talk about this later.

“You’re looking for people to make the run, aren’t you?” she pressed. “To pass information to the cells outside? I can do it.”

“No.” Jorund ground out.

“Yes, I can. I made it past those two. Probably could’ve snuck right by without them lifting their heads.” she waved an arm back towards Rundulf and Connor who stood catching their breath. They passed each other a dark look. “I’m quick. I’m nearly invisible. No one pays me any mind. And those patrols aren’t going to be looking for someone like me. They’re not going to suspect me of carrying Resistance intel.”

There was the briefest pause of silence and then, “She makes a good point, Jorund.” one of the other men spoke up.

“I said no.” Jorund snapped his head towards the man, glaring in his direction.

“We’ve been sending our boys who could fight if it came down to it but maybe that’s the problem. They look like they could fight. Empire ain’t gonna look twice at this wisp of a girl.” he continued on, undeterred.

“And if she runs into trouble?” a woman next to him countered.

“You heard her, she can run.”

“She can outrun two boys, not a imperial patrol, Bernier. I don’t know about you but I’m not comfortable sending a girl headlong into the waiting arms of Garleans.”

Behind her, Aislinn heard Connor make a low noise in the back of his throat that sounded distinctly like an ‘I told you so’ to her.

“Oh, but sending our boys is alright?”

“Don’t pull that shite. I know as well as anyone here what a patrol will do to the girl if they get their hands on her.”

“I’m tellin’ you, they ain’t gonna be looking twice.”

“Quiet.” Jorund’s voice, instead of rising to meet the others, had grown soft and still. It brought an immediate halt to any conversation. He stared down at Aislinn with a dark sort of anger but she saw something behind that. Something raw and broken. Something that told her he would forever see her as the child she had been, the little girl he had bounced on his knee. And any hope she had fostered of taking a meaningful part in this Resistance faded to nothing. She knew his answer before he even opened his mouth.

“She’ll get caught. And do you think she’ll hold up under questioning? Or do you think she’ll spill every little detail she knows and bring the Empire down on us? We’re the only ones feedin’ th’ others intel from the inside. We can’t let something like tha’ happen.” he growled and though he spoke to the others, he kept his flinty gaze trained on her, hammering the words home. Willing her to understand once and for all. “She’s too much of a risk. Send Connor.”

------

(The result of Connor’s run can be found here.)

#ffxiv writing #ffxivwrite2021 #Prompt 1 #Foster #Aislinn North #her da #always making the wrong decisions

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moonlit-jeno · 5 years

Text

jaemin + edging

"Do you know how fucking hard I’ve been this entire day?” Jaemin asks, lifting his mouth from your core. You’re still trembling, tears in your eyes as you feel your orgasm receding.

“No.” You shake your head, trying to push Jaemin’s face back to your core. He grabs your hands and pins them next to your body.

He scoffs. “Yes you do, don’t ask innocent. You knew what you were doing to me when you teased me. Come on baby, grinding against me when we were sitting there just trying to watch the movie. And earlier this morning, when you ‘ran out of time’ while blowing me? You just wanted me all riled up, hmm?”

Jaemin turns his head to kiss your inner thighs, nipping slightly at the flesh. “It’s okay baby, I’m not mad. I just want you to have a taste of your own medicine. Do you know how many orgasms you stole from me today?” You shake your head and he smirks, dark and exciting. “Well you’re about to.”

His mouth reattaches to your core, tongue fucking deep inside your hole. You jolt, hips bucking up until Jaemin has to throw an arm over your stomach to keep you in place. Lips wrap around your clit as two slender fingers enter you and you sob, feeling your orgasm rush at you full force. You don’t say anything, but Jaemin knows your body better than you do, pulling away at the last possible second. A few tears slip down your cheeks, frustration building.

Your boyfriend just smiles widely at you. “That’s for moaning all throughout lunch. I almost came in my pants from that, y/n.”

You laugh despite yourself, remembering how flustered he had been at lunch, with you slurping your milkshake down with pucker lips and hollowed cheeks. Haechan gave Jaemin the Heimlich because he coughed so hard when you palmed him over his pants.

“Think it’s funny, hmm? Are you still going to be laughing after I’ve fucked your slutty hole five times and you still haven’t come?” The words are so out of character for your gentle, loving boyfriend.

You shake your head. “I’m sorry.” “Not yet you aren’t.” With that, his face is burying itself back in your pussy, eating you out with the same vigor. And Jaemin’s a god at eating pussy, has gone down on your for hours before, but never without letting you come. The knot in your gut is tied so tight it almost hurts, your orgasm so close yet so far.

You’ve lost track of how many times he’s edged you, only know that you’re babbling incoherently, begging and pleading with him. Your head feels fuzzy, body tired. Oversensitivity has set in by this point, making you hyperaware of Jaemin’s touch. Even the slightest touch of his thumb to your clit has you gasping at this point.

He’s not even fingering you anymore, content to sit between your legs and ghost his finger over your clit, barely touching you. And yet, it’s enough to have your orgasm rushing to the surface, crashing back down when he stops. He taps at your clit rapidly, just a barely there pressure that has you losing your mind. “You’re beautiful.” He tells you, eyes roaming over your figure, from the rapid rise and fall of your chest to the sheen of sweat making you glow. “Do you wanna come?” You nod, pleas falling from your lips. He smiles.

“Too bad.” Jaemin shifts onto his back, stretching his arms over his head and shaking his wrist out. “My hands cramping, baby. Come suck me off for a bit.” You’re a little sluggish from having been on edge for the past who knows long. But it’s a nice break from the constant torture, even if you’re desperate and throbbing. Besides, Jaemin’s got a nice dick and you love sucking it.

He keeps one hand in your hair, using it to control the pace. To make sure that you aren’t going to tease him back. His cock is thick and heavy on your tongue and you want him in your pussy. You clench sadly around nothing.

“Ah, angel, being so good for me. If only you were this good earlier, then I wouldn’t have to do this to you.” You moan around him, making his sentence stutter off, head falling back. “Would be able to make you come until you pass out, treat you like the princess you are.” The hand in your hair yanks you up, pulling you to meet Jaemin’s lips in a kiss. He rolls you gently onto your stomach, pulling your hips up so that you’re face down, ass up. His hands squeeze your hips and pull you backwards, lining himself up with your entrance.

“Do you feel how hard I am for you?” He asks, pressing it to your hole but not letting it enter. “I’ve been like this the whole day.”

He holds you there until you’re sobbing, begging, pleading with him, trying so hard to fuck yourself back on him. Finally, finally, once you were certain he wasn’t going to fuck you, he slams into you.

His fat cock fills you up so nicely, stretches you out just right. “Fuck!” You cry out, finally getting what you’ve been needing.

Jaemin slaps your ass and rolls his hips into you, starting a pace that immediately reignites the fire in your gut. He pounds into you, turning your head so that you can’t even muffle your cries into your pillow. Years of sleeping with you has given him the expertise needed to avoid you sweet spot, his hips angle frustratingly away.

Teeth bite into your shoulder as Jaemin comes without you, his orgasm finally achieved while you twitch and writhe in the sheets, so close yet so far from release.

You’re kept in position, hips being pushed just a little higher and then there’s a mouth on your inner thigh, working up to your pussy. Jaemin eats licks his come out of you, tongue fucking deep into your hole and making you sob. The sheets are clenched tightly in your hands and you think you might accidentally rip them.

He finally makes it to your clit, sucking harshly while fucking you with two fingers, and you’re gone. You scream as you come, unable to register anything besides the intense pleasure coursing through your entire body. It lasts an insane amount of time, so intense and so much.

Jaemin rolls you onto your stomach when you’re done, pulling you into his side and carding his hands through your hair. You turn your head sluggishly, smiling at him.

“You okay?” He asks, pressing a kiss to your forehead. You nod, stretching your legs.

“Yeah. I think I blacked out for a minute though.” Jaemin hums, kissing you more firmly on the lips. “You’re shaking. Was it too much?” You shake your head. “It was a lot but it was good. I liked it.” Your boyfriend looks relieved. “Good. Do you need anything? Food, water, bath?” “Boba and a bath?” He kisses you again. “Okay baby. I’ll make Jeno go get it. C’mon, I’ll go fill up the tub.”

#nct #nct smut #nct dream smut #jaemin smut #na jaemin smut #this is so fucking long im sorry

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unfortunatelysirius · 5 years

Text

STUDY BUDDY // SIRIUS BLACK X READER

「 ❁ 」PROMPT 「 ❁ 」 You’re Sirius’s History of Magic tutor, but it occurs to you that maybe he doesn’t need the extra help.

「 ❁ 」WARNINGS 「 ❁ 」 Swearing, Fluff

「 ❁ 」WORD COUNT 「 ❁ 」

2426

“Y/N, I have to say this before I go mad,” said Lily Evans out of the blue one day, as you and your four dormmates lounged in the common-room. “You’re bloody oblivious.”

You looked up from your Transfiguration essay. Against your will, a beetroot flush spread across your cheeks. Why would Lily say something like that? What did I do wrong? “What do you mean?” you asked her.

Lily exchanged a glance with Marlene, who was absentmindedly throwing a wad of parchment up into the air. While Lily’s expression was unreadable, Marlene’s was very readable; layers of anger and irritation were flickering on the hollows of her jaw. The girl in question sat up, caution-less, and blurted out, “Are you really that thick?”

Silence. Marlene quickly covered her mouth, looking simultaneously unabashed and apologetic, while Lily bit her lip and sighed. Mary was twiddling her fingers, looking out-of-place in the conversation—and Alice, well, she was looking over at Frank Longbottom, who was sat with a few other members of the Gryffindor Quidditch team.

You sat down your quill. “Well, I don’t know what you’re talking about. At all. What is it?”

It was Alice, of all the girls, to say, “They’re talking about Sirius.”

“What about Sirius?” You wracked your brain for a logical explanation for why Sirius would have anything to do with this conversation—why he, of everything and anything that could be a part of this conversation, was what made you “thick” and “oblivious.” There was nothing. “He’s who I tutor in History of Magic. What’s he got to do with anything?”

Lily let out a groan, while the other girls shared frustrated glances. Was there something you were missing? It seemed so. Made especially apparent when Marlene huffed out a raspberry and said, with all the poise and subtlety of a bear, “He fancies you, you nitwit.”

No. No. Your expression grew befuddled, and your brow twitched. Did you raise an eyebrow, or furrow your forehead until your face was nothing but creases and squinty eyes? You couldn’t decide. “Sirius does not fancy me,” you said, ignoring the way your heart spluttered at the news. “He’s a womanizer. Womanizers don’t settle.”

“He would for you!” Marlene burst. The entire common room glanced over, and Alice sunk deep into the divan when Frank’s attention diverted to the girls. A look of apology was on Marlene’s face, but again—she didn’t look as sorry as she should have been. “Sorry. Anyway… We’ve been here for—what? Five years? And I’ve never seen Sirius like this with anyone. He doesn’t respect boundaries, and he flirts even when the girl’s not bloody interested. The only girl he’s ever shown respect for is Lily, and that’s because James has claimed her for himself.”

“Hey!” protested Lily, but she went ignored.

You shook your head. “I don’t believe that at all,” you said. Your mind was in an over-analytical uproar, going through past memories and picking apart scenes that supported and uncorroborated Marlene’s claim. What you concluded was that Sirius saw you as a sister. Why else was he so kind and respectful towards you? “I think he sees me as a sister.”

“Oh, Merlin.” Marlene face palmed. Alice broke into a giggle fit. Lily’s lips twitched, like she was half a second from joining Alice in uncontrollable laughter, and Mary… well, she just looked confused. She wasn’t there when Marlene, Alice, and Lily conspired about Sirius fancying you. “I think I’m going to cry. Y/N, you are frustratingly dim.”

You shook your head, chancing a glance around the common room to make sure no one of notable importance was around. You honestly probably would have fainted if you had to explain to any of the Marauders what this conversation was about, and where the idea of a crush was coming from. Any of them would laugh it off—except Sirius, who would hang this over your head until the day you died. And that was what reasoning you gave yourself when you pretended to roll up a sleeve and check an imaginary wristwatch, yanking down the cloth before any of your dormmates could notice the lie.

“Well, would you look at the time—I have a session with Sirius in a few minutes.” You started throwing your things into your satchel, barely sparing a wince when your Transfiguration essay was crumbled and carelessly shoved into the bag. Oh well, I’ll fix it later, you thought dismissively, only taking precaution when you had a bottle of ink in your hand.

The girls watched you suspiciously. “I thought you only had sessions on Tuesdays and Thursdays,” said Lily, her mouth twisting into a frown.

“We changed it, to fit with his Quidditch schedule and my prefect duties.”

“Halfway through the semester?” Marlene was catching on. So were the other three, though Mary didn’t verbalize her suspicions—something you were ever-so-thankful for.

You gave them a quick smile. “Yup. Bye!” You hightailed it out of the common room, barely dodging the Marauders as they were just entering from the Fat Lady portrait.

“Oh, hullo, Y/N!” said Sirius, flashing you a damnably charming smile. For a moment, you lost your wits and all you wanted to do was smile and say your own, albeit awkward, greeting—but then you remembered…

Marlene. Lily. Alice. Mary.

All undoubtedly watching this potential catastrophe, from the oblivious look on Sirius’s face to the dawning horror in yours.

“Hey, Sirius!” you said in reply. You made sure to ignore your dormmates, who were burning holes in your backside. “Ready to study?”

His warm, inviting features turned confused. “I thought we—” The bespectacled one, James, thumped him in the back—a weird gesture, but one you found yourself appreciating, nonetheless. Sirius’s face reddened. “Yeah, okay. I do have my book and some parchment on me… Might need to borrow a quill.” He sounded strangely nervous as he held up his bag, which seemed to overflow with materials. James and Remus were silently observing him, one with a shite-eating grin and the other with a subtle smile.

You nodded, in a rush to leave. So rushed, in fact, that your mind barely took time to observe Sirius’s red face and shy, embarrassed demeanor—something that you could have put into the support pile for Marlene’s claim. “Okay, let’s go.” Not realizing just what you were doing, you grabbed Sirius’s hand. And you dragged him behind you as you left the common room in a hurry.

“Wow, where’s the fire?” he joked, voice a bit too shaky to be coming from Sirius. But you ignored it. Desperate to get away from the vicinity, when you wouldn’t put it past Marlene and Lily to follow the two of you to the classroom. “Y/N—”

You realized what you were gripping, and quickly dropped it. His hand. Oh Merlin, you hoped your palm hadn’t been too sweaty. “Sorry. I just really needed to get away,” you said, knowing it was a lousy explanation. There was literally no reason for you to manhandle him like that, you tosser. You flinched outwardly, feeling a copious amount of guilt. “That’s no excuse, I know—”

“You don’t need excuses to hold my hand, Y/N,” said Sirius. When you stopped in your tracks and looked over at him, he was smiling. Humor danced in his eyes. Of course he’s joking, you thought, wanting to throttle yourself for thinking he meant anything by it. Of course. He wouldn’t like me like that. “I’m slacking in History of Magic, anyway.”

McGonagall said you’ve been doing exceptionally well in the class, though… You shook your head, trying not to dwell on suspicions. Unlike Marlene, you didn’t like to doubt people; Sirius wouldn’t lie. He wasn’t a very conniving person. “Alright. We’ll go to the Arithmancy classroom. I’ve got a key.”

“Why do you have a key?” Sirius looked intrigued. He probably thought you did something against the prefect code—like stealing. You felt slightly bad for disappointing his expectations.

“You’re not my only student, Sirius,” you told him, feeling shy. Sirius’s smile flattened completely, a look of bemusement flashing in his unusual grey eyes. “I tutor a fourth-year in Arithmancy, and another fifth year in Ancient Runes.”

“I thought I was your only student,” said Sirius, sounding and looking like a petulant child.

You loosed a sigh. Against your better judgment, you felt obligated to reassure him. “Sirius, they’re just blokes I help with homework,” you tried.

Sirius stopped in the middle of the hallway. He stared at you with this look of utter frustration, and before you knew it, he was throwing his hands into the air, one reaching to tug furiously at his curly, charcoal-black hair. “Yeah! And I bet they asked McGonagall for you specifically! They’re not slick; I know they heard me telling Prongs about it—”

“What?” you said abruptly. On a different occasion, you might have felt guilty for interrupting him, but the way he worded what he said… “Sirius, don’t tell me… you…”

Sirius’s face turned red. And he said nothing.

“Why?” Marlene’s assumptions whizzed through your head. They didn’t sound so implausible now. In fact, the rational voice in your head told you to firmly believe them.

“Weren’t we going to study?” Sirius wouldn’t look you in the eye. “Let’s just forget I said anything, and just—” He cut himself off. His gaze was anxious as he repeatedly glanced from you to the ground.

You shook your head, but otherwise said nothing. Making sure Sirius saw the suspicion in your gaze, you felt an overwhelming sense of satisfaction when his own gaze lowered, embarrassed. It was very un-Sirius-like. You wondered what his head looked like at that moment—if it was haywire or as calm as an abandoned poolside.

The two of you walked in anxious silence all the way to the Arithmancy classroom. Even when you got the door, you found yourself void of anything to say. The same could not be said for the bloke at your side. As you rummaged through your bag, searching for the key, Sirius cleared his throat.

“Are you angry?” he asked. When you looked over at him, classroom key in hand, you couldn’t help but to raise an eyebrow. He couldn’t be serious.

Sirius is my middle name, you imagined him saying, as cheeky as always, and you wondered where his humor had gone. He seemed far too nervous to be a Marauder, and that observation made you a tad-bit more irritated than you should have been.

Even if Marlene were right, a crush wouldn’t make someone so unlike their usual self.

“No, I’m not angry. Just irritated,” you told him as you unlocked the door. You pushed it open, gesturing for him to be the first one inside. He slowly went, after giving you a reluctant glance.

He silently went and sat at one of the tables. By the time you made your way over, he already had his book and parchment out. But he was looking at you sheepishly. Pursing your lips, you said, “What?”

“I need to borrow a quill,” he said.

You shook your head. “You won’t need a quill.”

Sirius looked confused. You couldn’t blame him. You hardly even knew what you were doing, let alone saying.

Be bold. You’re a Gryffindor! you thought. But looking at Sirius, as he sat there, staring, this look of apprehension on his face…

You flushed.

“What?” Sirius leaned forward in his seat, ignoring his parchment as a roll of it fell on the ground. “Are you alright, Y/N?”

“Do you fancy me?” you blurted out.

It was almost comical how quickly Sirius’s body retracted. How his eyes widened. How his jaw fell open.

How quick he was to stammer out, “W-Wha… w-where’d you get that idea? Ha-ha…”

His eyes weren’t looking anywhere near you, and his skin was flushed red. His behavior was almost identical to yours.

“Marlene said you fancy me,” you told him. You wanted to curse yourself for admitting who put the idea in your head, as Sirius would definitely say something to Marlene in the near future. What kind of friend were you? “I mean, I didn’t think she was right… I still don’t… but I just wanted to ask. Clear the air.”

Clear the air, my arse. You just want to see if he’d be a willing shagging participant. The lustful part of you stayed silent, in complete agreement.

Sirius let out a breath. “Okay, so… maybe, there is the slight chance… I do. Yeah, a slight. Itty-bitty.” He raised a hand, putting just a centimeter of distance between his thumb and pointer finger. “Very tiny! About as small as Snivellus’s brain.”

“Is that why you asked McGonagall to have me tutor you?” You crinkled your brow. When Sirius stayed silent, his eyes expressive of where his answer lied, you let out a laugh. You couldn’t help it; the womanizing Sirius, going to the lowest of heights just to spend time alone with you. With you, of all people. What were the odds?

“Yes, laugh at me!” Sirius looked a hundred more times embarrassed than he already did, his face cocked in the opposite direction of you. His face was so red, you could hardly tell what natural pigment his skin was. “Right before you reject me. What ways a bird has of afflicting a man’s ego… Merlin’s beard, Y/N, you are heartless.”

“I wouldn’t bring it up if I didn’t fancy you back,” you told him.

“Yeah, I bet—wait, what?” Sirius’s head snapped towards you. “Are you being serious?”

“There is only one Sirius in this room, and it isn’t me.” Your lip twitched, and you lowered your gaze. That previous Gryffindor confidence was wearing off, and you were back to your usual self—reserved and awkward. “But… yeah. I’m not lying.”

Sirius hopped up from where he was sitting, knocking the chair out from underneath himself. Before you knew it, your gaze was locking onto a pair of shoes just inches from your own, and when your eyes traveled up, they met a silver pair. “That’s… great news,” he breathed.

“Yeah,” you breathed back.

Moments passed, and the two of you continued to stare at one another.

“I really want to kiss you,” he suddenly said. His hangs hung limply to his sides.

Before you could tell yourself no, that this wasn’t the best place, you replied, “So kiss me.”

And so he did, History of Magic study-work be damned.

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mrs-i-have-too-many-biases · 5 years

Text

Bts’ reaction to them realising they are in love

Scenario: They realise they are in love with their s/o.

Genre: fluff

Pairing: Reader X BTS members

Jin:

You were cooking dinner for him and you as you two were having a night alone at his apartment. Jin was busy cleaning up the mess you made, after you had a food fight earlier with the popcorn you had. Jin walked into the room and saw you running up and down the kitchen to make sure everything was perfect.

Jin leaned against the door frame and stared at you for a while, thinking about how he'd want to spend the rest of his life with you. Waking up next to you, cooking together with you and just have you for him all for his own for the rest of his life. He wanted to love you forever. He walked up to you hugging your waist from behind.

"You know I love you right?" He whispered making you drop your spoon your were cooking with in surprise. "R-really?" You asked surprised.

"Yes, I love you so much. I just can't explain how much. That's how much I love you. And I promise you, one day I'll make you mine forever. That's a promise." He says kissing your forehead. "I love you too Jin." You replied whilst hugging him.

Yoongi:

Yoongi was having a rough time, he was pressured by his manager to compose 4 songs in 2 days. Which was very hard, because Yoongi usually makes songs when he's inspired. But he wasn't right now.

He had no idea for a song.

He did had some melodies but they didn't work out for him. You walked into the music room you made in your house, your boyfriend was sitting behind the large piano with papers surrounding him. "Yoongi?" You ask your boyfriend as you saw him with a exhausted expression on his face and frustratingly pushing the piano tiles. "Yoongi." You say to him once again.

He didn't listen to you and kept doing his thing, but now looking even more frustrated than he already did. You walked towards him and hugged him from behind, making him relax immediately. He stopped his actions and rested his head against your chest as your arms were still around him.

"Go to bed babe, you can finish this tomorrow." You whispered to him kissing his hair, he nodded his hair before he stood up, kissed your head, and went straight to your shared bedroom. "You're coming baby?" He yelled from the other room.

"I'm coming!" You yell as you looked through the paper with lyrics written all over them and unfinished melodies. You took a seat behind your piano and started to drabble away some lyrics with the unfinished melodies your boyfriend had created.

The next morning your boyfriend woke up a little later than he wanted to, it was 2PM and he didn't had a song. "Y/N! I HAVE A PROMBLEM! THIS IS SO BAD!" Your boyfriend yells as he paced down back and fort. "Y/N! THIS IS GOING TO BE THE END OF ME! THEY WOULD BE SO DISSPOINTED IN ME I-" He yells paniced.

"Yoongi?" "What?" He snaps, looking at you angered and lost. "Maybe this would help, I don't know?" You say unsure, giving him the papers.

"What's this?" He asks surprised and unsure. "Your song." "What?" "I finished your song, I knew you had a hard time composing it so, I drabbled some away yesterday. But it's probably bad so-" "No, no it's not at all." He says whilst looking at it. "I-it isn't?" "No! This is amazing! I love you so much my little saviour!" He mutters against your lips.

"You love me?"

"I do."

Hoseok:

You and your boyfriend are both professional dancers. You had your own dance studio in Gwangju, that's were you met. Hoseok would go to your studios to practice his dancing. Ever since you saw him there you knew he had talent, and also that he had something in his smile that could made you melt in any second.

And now that you were dating for over a year, and still going strong, your own dance company got very successful and you got your dance studios all around the country. And you, yourself were a great choreographer. Right now, you were helping your boyfriend with some choreography he and the rest of BTS have to learn for their newest song. It's some challenging choreography but you and Hoseok love a little bit of a challenge.

Well, until you get frustrated of it. Well, not you exactly, but your boyfriend.

He danced almost everything perfectly except that one part where the both of you struggled with.

"UGH! I CAN'T DO THIS! THIS IS USELESS!" Your boyfriend yells as he let himself fall onto the floor. "C'mon Hobie, you can do this. Don't give up this easily! Did you gave up on us when we had a fight? No. Did you gave up on me when I played hard to get? No. Did you gave up to be here where you are today? No! Now get your ass up and come dance with me. If we got through the rest together we can to this!" Hoseok has seemed to be cheered up by your pep talk because he jumped up and kissed you quickly cupping your cheeks in his hands.

"I love you." "I-I love you too." You whispered happily.

"Let's do this together?"

"Together."

Namjoon:

He was busy in the studios, practicing and rehearsing everything for their upcoming shows. You on the other hand was at home alone doing absolutely nothing. You were pretty bored so you decided to blast some music and enjoy yourself by dancing along to the songs. You were enjoying yourself so much that you didn't noticed your boyfriend had walked in. You were currently dancing and rapping along to Joonie's part in Ddaeng. He saw you dancing their choreography almost perfectly and he loved how much you loved their music. He knew how much you loved everyone of BTS.

That always has been a spot of you Namjoon had a weakness for. He loved how you would fangirl at them, he loved how you'd throw a pillow at him whenever you'd be bored. He loves how you would stay up late to wait for him to come home. He realized: he loves you, for everything you do. He ran up to you and pulled you into his arms as you still danced.

He danced along with you as soon as you relaxed from the scare your boyfriend gave you. "I love you so much you little weirdo." He mutters whilst he pressed soft little kisses all over your face.

Jimin:

Jimin had been acting odd lately. He has been eating less and he was gone more often. First you had the feeling he was cheating on you, but you quickly got that thought out of your head, knowing he wouldn't do that to you. There was something else, one day when you were cuddling and your arms were around his waist you noticed the sudden abs. "Since when do you have abs again." You asked him in surprise. "You like them?" He asks with a smirk.

"They're okay." You mumbled to him putting your head back on his shoulder.

What you didn't noticed that day is that he though there weren't good enough so he trained harder and harder to impress you. After some time, he started to starve himself.

"Jimin, you got to eat." You say to him worryingly. "But than you won't love me." He whispered, not thinking you'd have heard. "What?" "You won't love a fat pig like me." He said louder.

"Where the hell did that come from? And who told you that?"

"ARMY." He mutterd.

"No, no, no. Those aren't your fans those people are jealous. The real fans love you for who you are. Is this why you got these chocolate abs?" "Yes, they told me I wasn't good enough and that I was a pig and, and-" He started but he couldn't finish as he choked on his tears.

"You aren't fat. I love you for you. I fell in love with this idiot who loved to have eating contest with me and have midnight adventures. I love you for being there for me. And you know I'll be there for you whenever you need me. And this is one of those." Jimin looked at you in surprise as you told them. "I love you too." He kissed your hair lovingly taking you in his arms, blessed that he could call you his.

Taehyung:

BTS was having a reunion together and everyone of their families were invited too! You were Tae's girlfriend and you had never met his family, so this was a big step in your relationship. When they were right in front of you, you suddenly got very nervous and shy. You greeted them respectfully and they smiled at you. "Why are you so shy? We don't bite." His mother says friendly noticing you were nervous.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be." She gave you a hug before she went talking with her son, leaving you alone with his nephews. They asked you to play with them and you gladly accepted their offer. As you were gone to play with Tae's nephews, your boyfriend started to question where his girlfriend was.

"Dad? Has you seen y/n?" "She's there playing with the boys." His father says making Tae look at him surprised at his answer. He looked at you having a good time with the little ones, not caring that you didn't got your boyfriend's attention. You knew how much his family means to him, so you let him be. Tae couldn't keep his mind by the conversation his parents were having with him. He was staring at you how good you were with kids, he just couldn't wait to have his own with you. "Tae?"

"Yes?"

"Are you okay?"

"Yes, why?"

"Don't worry she's a keeper." His dad says smiling proudly at his son.

"Good, because I love her too much to let her go."

Jungkook:

Jungkook was with you and the rest of BTS at studios. You were a good friend of Yoongi and he introduced you to the rest. Ever since you and Jungkook has met, he has been feeling weird around you. He has gotten a feeling he has never felt around any girl.

You made him feel some kind of way, and he just couldn't figure out what it was. Hobie was recording his video's for 'Hope on the street' and he asked you to be in them. Of course you agreed, you loved dancing! You also loved singing and dancing, you also loved material art, something you also had in common with Jungkook.

When you and Hobie were dancing to Chris Brown's 'Fine by me', Jungkook was staring at you, every move you made, would his eyes follow you. He started at you constantly.

He was trying to figure out what you were doing to him. Because every time you'd walk by, he'd get nervous and shy, he even stuttered when you asked him how late it was! He thought he was going total nuts! At least that's what he though, but what he actually was is that he's in love with you.

He couldn't get you out of his head, you'd always be something he would question to the others.

'Where's y/n?' 'Is y/n coming?' 'I miss her.' And as he kept staring at you while you danced he tried to figure out, how to get you to be his girlfriend.

Gifs aren't mine.

#bts imagines #bts scenarios #bts #bts reactions #bangtan #min yoongi #kim namjoon #kim taehyung #kim seokjin #jeon jungkook #jung hoseok #park jimin #kpop fluff #kpop imagines #kpop reactions #kpop scenarios #bts fluff #bts oneshots

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dukeofriven · 5 years

Text

From An Old Internet Veteran: Go, and Sin No More

I wish I could explain to young people how wild the internet was as it went from the ‘weird niche thing for lame nerds’ irrelevancy of the early 90s and the “Boy This World Wide Web Thing Sure Is Nifty”-style painful optimism that describes 97% of Western Culture between 1994 and 2002 to the ‘Mad Max But Statistically Less Australian” culture that was the internet from 2002 to around 2010. I come neither to praise this era of internet nor condemn it. I merely want understanding. I cannot polish a lumpen pile of rape jokes, Chuck Norris glorification, “ironic” racism, and numa numa fat shaming and say that it’s misunderstood comedic genius. Trash is still trash even if it wins a bunch of Emmys. But at the same time I cannot take you with me back to the 90s and get you to feel, on a visceral level, what it was like to live in a place where Bart Simpson was both promoted as a real and present danger to the moral upbringing of the world’s children and was named by Time magazine as one of the most influential icons of the 20th century. And because I cannot do that I cannot get you to understand how freeing it felt to be on the internet in that Mad Max era. Ten years before a yellow boy shouting “Don’t have a cow” while doing a pathetic kick-flip on a chunky skateboard was considered the potential downfall of humanity’s children, but now you could make something so risqué that the old-guard stuffed-shirt in 1994 would have died on the spot, his brain unable to consider anything so outside his moral world view. I cannot easily make you understand a time when nobody just said whatever it was they wanted, not just because they had no platform to do so but because the rigidity of social convention was so strong. Nobody ever had hardcore lesbian sex on Northern Exposure on prime time television. Nobody on the X-Files ever died by having their head smashed in a car door repeatedly like a melon until viscera spilled all over the pavement. You could not have made Game of Thrones or Steven Universe in 1995. Forget the graphics, forget the budget, you simply couldn’t do or say any of that on television for either kids or adults. The Mad Max internet changed that - changed the very firmament of what was acceptable in media for every genre and for every demographic. Is this a good thing? Not particularly. Is this a bad thing? Not particularly. If this sound frustratingly ambivalent that’s because it is: were we to go back and do it all again, knowing all that we know now, would we do it the same way? No. But then, we would not know all that we know now had we not learned it by making the attempt in the first place.

This poor comfort for someone who dives into some 2006 webcomic with a reputation of a Legacy Touchstone and finds it full of ‘jokes’ about their gender, or sexual preference, or the liberal use of the r-slur, or a kind of hyper-suburban comedic racial ignorance. I am not here to argue that that had any value merely because it was transgressive. But the same space that opened-up to let such ugly things out also opened-up places for marginalized groups to made themselves known, groups who never before had such public voices.

Imagine an apocalypse. Imagine society rebuilding in the ashes. Imagine how many false starts and missteps there would be and you begin to understand just a little of what that period was like. It was embarrassing. It was cruel. It was childish and stupid. But in living through it we grew up. Or, at least, those of us capable of growing up grew up, and learned, and learned to be better - learned what better was. And then we built new places where other people could learn too - and spread the gospel of being better. One of the things that always irritates me when it comes to young people talking about the past is the unexamined privilege of knowledge being at your fingertips. It’s more than just everyone carrying a wireless-internet connected computer in their pocket at all times. It’s more than just a Wikipedia with hundreds of millions of articles and a reputation for fact sourcing. It’s more than just a Google that works. If you never experienced it you cannot imagine what using WebCrawler was like in 1995 against Ask Jeeves in 2005 against Google in 2015 - or even Google between 2005 and 2015. Most people don’t go around thinking about SEO and search engine algorithms but maybe we should because anyone who wants to go “this info’s been on the internet since day one so people have no excuse not to know it” disingenuously argues that information search and retrieval has been consistent across the decades. There was a time - not all that long ago - when to look something up on-line involved getting the tacit agreement of everyone in your household to lose the use of the sole telephone for as long as you were web browsing. There was a time - not all that long ago - when ‘looking something up’ was to burden everyone around you with inconveniences, and while you were doing your web searches there was no guarantee what you wanted could be found with the primitive technology of the day. Do you know how much I’ve learned since joining Tumblr in 2011? On a fundamental level, both about myself and the make-up of our species in terms of social conception? I recently went through a bunch of old posts, removing those with broken links and meaningless content, but also shit that just embarrasses me now - mostly opinions from a period where I hadn’t yet had a chance to learn because the spaces in which to learn it did not yet exist. It’s not just things like communities for [demographic X] - it’s things like “communities for [demographic X] with an ability to broadcast their voices and have platforms able to network their ideas and audience halls able to receive them and a search engine to guide people to that community and a basic understanding that the community even exists in the first place.” And this does not even begin to touch on internet access, something that even now is not a universal thing, and for which getting angry about people’s ignorance reflects a bias all its own. I say all this because I think that a core tenant of cringe culture is a myth of universal access to knowledge and universal awareness of one’s own ignorance. I look back on old posts of things I said and I cringe with self-hatred - cringe enough to rip them down and stuff them in the trash. “HOW DID I THINK THAT?” and “HOW DID I NOT KNOW?” But why should I have known - what, in my life, would ever have put better ideas across my desk? That I can meaningfully speak now about privilege and intersectionality and historiography is because between then and now I was put in a place to learn these things. I was exposed to ideas that I had never before been exposed to, and was given the grace to learn. I am tired of the expectation that every aspect of our past selves should be held to the same standard as the present. (Yes, to all the disingenuous bad-faith trolls out there, I obviously and of course am advocating for complete and total uncritical pardon for everything in the past ever. Were you a neo-Nazi ten years ago? Water under the bridge without question because that’s obviously, obviously, obviously the sort of extreme outlier case I am talking about good on you for being clever enough to notice.) But for the non-dipshits out there who understand how to read without injecting insincere hyperbole into every argument, I want us to be kinder to our past selves when we have learned to be better. It’s okay that you used to like Sherlock - there were genuinely fun things about it, and it’s okay that you didn’t possess an expert grasp of post-graduate feminist critical theory when you were 21. Or 31. Or 41. More concepts of academia have filtered into mainstream consciousness than ever before - and in saying that we should remember the corollary that ten, twenty, thirty years ago that was not the case. We knew less, had access to less, and were exposed to narrower viewpoints than we are today. It is unfortunate - but it was not our fault, and we cannot easily blame ourselves for it any longer. Nothing makes my blood boil more than seeing people taking umbrage that... oh, Farmer Joe McSmithHead of Buttnut, Alabama in 1963 was ignorant of internal Chinese politics and said some untrue things about Chinese Communism. But the only thing Farmer Joe had to tell him of the outside world was a radio that played country music, a TV with four channels and strict content guidelines to only show pleasant, moral, and god-fearing content, and the three books in the Buttnut library, two of which were the Bible. There have, and will always be, certain moral lines so obvious that people of any era should always be held accountable to them. But above that, in the more trivial space of media consumption, absorption, and critique, we have to learn to be more forgiving - to ourselves and to others, so long as in the present we have changed. Did you use the r-slur a lot because it was practically a form of punctuation on 4chan and that’s where you learned the ways of the internet? Did you learn the harmfulness of this practice and cease to do it? Then I do not condemn thee - go, and sin no more. Did you and your friends used to make jokes about how Mexicans smelled because you saw Seinfeld do that in his standup and the whole TV laughed as though it was funny? Did you realize one day ‘wait a minute that’s actually super gross’ and stop repeating it? Then I do not condemn thee - go, and sin no more. Have you gone back to a beloved childhood property and found it’s full of woman-beating and weird views on homosexuality? Did you find yourself able to critique this beloved thing and did not defensively double-down on shielding it from all harsh words? Then I do not condemn thee - go, and sin no more. I will not allow us to dismiss the cruelty and hurt of Mad Max Internet Culture with a flippant ‘well that’s just how it was back then” but nor will I allow anyone to condemn us all as being consciously unfeeling, willfully ignorant, purposefully hateful. Some of us were. But some of us did not know, could not have known, needed to learn - and we were lucky enough to live in a time before cringe culture and cancel culture where we were allowed to have that opportunity to learn and grow. We need that today, for all young people who think themselves as woke as can be and ten years from now will look back and blush with shame for things they said and did in total ignorance. The sin is choosing to never change, not failing to change sooner.

#cringe culture #cancel culture #4chan #mad max #internet culture #the simpsons #bart simpson #r-slur #x-files #game of thrones #steven universe #Northern Exposure #chuck norris #jerry seinfeld #Alabama #communism #long post

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langdvnshepherd · 5 years

Text

Headcanons: Duncan Shepherd as a dad (Duncan Shepherd x fem!reader)

Word Count: 2.1k

Warnings: none really it’s literally all tooth-rotting fluff I’m sorry lmao, mentions of smut

A/N: Someone requested more dad!Duncan and I, uh, had to do it. Definitely message me if you ever want to hc dad!Duncan because I can do this shit all day. I’d love some feedback as well as some suggestions on what to write next!

We’ve discussed how Duncan would act before his baby is born, but what about after?

First of all, he would not be able to keep his eyes off of them

He’s in awe at all times that someone as cold as him helped create the most precious thing he had ever seen in his life

Even when he’s exhausted from taking care of them all night and changing diaper after diaper, he would opt to just watch the way their little nose twitches and their fingers flex as they sleep

Every little coo or grunt that comes out of them is the cutest thing he’s ever heard

Their cute little toes are his favorite

Loses it every time he sees how tiny their clothes are

sorry idk how to make the cut work so this line has to be here lmao my b

Also really loves watching you breastfeed because those are his two favorite people and they get to bond in this very special way

Obsessed with how their eyes get droopy and they get all sleepy after their bellies are so full of milk

Going a little off topic— I picture that this is when he’d ask you to marry him

It would be super casual

You’re cuddled into his side while you’re feeding your little bub one morning and he’s contently watching the two of you and it just dawns on him that there’s literally no other way he could/would want to picture his life being like

He wants it to be you, him and the herd of babies the two of you create for as long as he lives

He says it plainly and matter-of-fact-ly that he wants you to marry him because this is it for him and he doesn’t want anything else

“I was gonna get you flowers and a giant ass ring and take you to a fancy dinner and be dramatic and with the whole shebang, but this just felt right. We can figure the rest out later.”

I would say he takes to fatherhood fairly well

Always offers to get up in the middle of the night and rock them back to sleep

Spit up and poop doesn’t gross him out

Thinks their little burps and farts are hilarious

“Heyyyyy, impressive! Just like your daddy.”

Cherishes skin-to-skin contact

At any and all times he can be found sitting on the couch or nursery rocking chair shirtless with his baby tucked into his chest

Also does the thing where if the baby falls asleep on him he refuses to move until they wake up regardless of what position he’s in

“My leg has been asleep for an hour, but there’s no way in hell I’m moving and waking up this sweet baby.”

You have an entire photo album on your phone of him and the baby asleep in the weirdest positions looking like identical versions of each other

Duncan’s arm tucked behind his head and slumped into the corner of the couch with your baby’s chubby cheeks smushed into his chest and legs tucked into their chest like a little football

When he has to take care of them alone for the first time he feels like he’s gonna puke

He’s convinced that something bad is going to happen even though you’re just going to work for half a day

If something happens it will be his fault and he won’t be able to live with himself

He calls you to before everything he does to make sure he’s not going to accidentally hurt them

“They have a rash on their butt, is the diaper cream the blue tube or the red tube?”

“Duncan, you know which one it is. You put it on them last week.”

“Yeah, I know. I just wanted to double check.”

He measures every breath they take until you get home because he doesn’t full trust himself alone with a child

You end up coming home to a quiet house and find Duncan and the baby knocked out on the floor with an old Mickey Mouse cartoon playing softly on the tv

He was going to be perfectly fine, you tried to tell him

The first time the baby gets sick he’s so heartbroken

Usually their cries can be softened with a boob in their mouth or some gentle rocking and pats on the booty but knowing he can’t do anything to help them this time makes him feel so sad

He just hold them as close as he can and tells them he’s sorry there’s nothing he can do until they finally drift off

Duncan also probably withdrawals himself from work gradually after the baby is born

Also chills out on the shady business because now he has a kid to consider and if he gets caught he isn’t the only one that will suffer the consequences

Taking on less of a work load to he can spend time with you two but also because having a kid has made him reflect a lot

He wants to be the parent he never really had

He wants to look back and say he was able to provide for his family, but was also still present for all of the little moments

Him and his baby are best buddies and I am a firm believer in that

You can calm them down and make them laugh and they love you so much but it’s nothing compared when they see Duncan walk into the room

They’re immediately in a better mood or having a giggle fit

They love it when Duncan tickles them with his beard when he gives them kisses or blow raspberries on their tummy and they love making grabby hands at it and scratching it

He talks to the baby like they’re grown and like their little babbles are actually words and it’s hilarious

“What’s that? You thought the State of the Union was pure shit? Well that makes two of us! I couldn’t believe the hot garbage coming out of his mouth either! What an idiot.”

It only encourages the baby to mumble and speak more gibberish because they’re thriving off of the attention they’re getting from their dad even though they have no idea what the fuck he’s saying

He fake wrestles with them by pretending to choke-slam them but he just softly flips them around and gently flops them down on the couch

Walks around the house with them hugging his leg or on his shoulders while they hold onto him by his hair

Duncan is always letting them do things you don’t want them to do like crawl around butt-naked or letting them suck a tiny bit of cake frosting off of his finger when you aren’t looking

“Duncan, you can’t keep doing that! All of that sugar’s going to upset their stomach.”

“But look at them, they LOVE it. You can’t look at that face and tell me that they don’t absolutely love it.”

Their first steps are towards Duncan one day when he’s home alone with them

He’s working on his laptop while the baby was messing around on the floor with their toy piano and chewing on the ear of their stuffed elephant

For whatever reason he diverts his attention from the screen to the baby and sees that they’re fully standing on two feet and rocking back and forth and concentrating super hard on staying upright

Duncan realizes what’s about to happen and eggs them on with the bowl of dry Cheerios they had been eating for breakfast

“Come on! Oh my god oh my god, come on you’re so close you can do it!!! Come here!!!”

They make it clear across the living room and stumble right before falling but Duncan scoops them up and tosses them straight up in the air out of excitement and the baby is a squealing mess from the kisses Duncan covers them in

Their first word is “mama” and he’s honestly a little salty because he thought he was special

“After all I do for you? All the times I get yelled at by your mom for feeding you sweets and cuddling you at night when you should be sleeping in your crib? You betray me like this? I see how it is.”

He definitely finds it extremely entertaining to make them say random words like “shit” or “fuck” and 100% gets yelled at for it after they made a habit of screaming it around the house

IMAGINE their first birthday

You know Duncan spends way too much money on unnecessary things that a one-year old will never remember

A giant cake that they’re inevitably going to smash to pieces with their tiny fists

He buys so many expensive baby toys and it doesn’t even matter in the end because all the baby wants to play with is Duncan’s cell phone and try to chew on his watch

Given that babies and toddlers are a handful to say the least, the relationship between the two of you definitely changes

Not in a bad way, just different

There’s not a lot of time when it’s just the two of you, so you have to make accommodations

Quickies in the shower or cuddle sex 20 minutes before the alarm goes off in the morning

Most of the time, you’re both too exhausted to do anything so it’s a lot different from when it was just the two of you and you were constantly trying to jump each other’s bones whenever possible

Random, domestic things that the other does start to turn you on

Watching Duncan in the kitchen in his glasses and boxers on a weekend morning teaching your kid how to peel an orange

Duncan watching you frustratingly change tops for the third time because you kept leaking through the fabric

Daddy kink takes on a new meaning

You fall more in love with each other after going through the adjustments of parenthood together

When they start going to daycare, Duncan is pretty sad

His baby isn’t really a baby anymore

But he lightens up when he sees how much fun they have when he picks them up everyday

They’re so excited to show him their new friends and where they put their mat for naptime and the finger-painting they made of your family (they insist that’s what it is but it’s really just a bunch of giant blobs but Duncan refuses to acknowledge that and congratulates them on being such a talented artist and puts it on the fridge it as soon as he gets home

They also love getting into the routine of getting ready with Duncan in the morning

Duncan let’s them stand on the counter and brush their teeth beside him and they make faces at each other in the mirror

Once, they tried to go for the razor because they saw Duncan do it once and Duncan’s life flashed before his eyes

They always give him a big, fat kiss and a tight hug with their tiny arms around his neck right before they run off into their classroom

He is the dilf of the daycare and we all know it

Everyone already thought your kid was the cutest in the class, but loses their shit when they see how hot their dad is

Comes in handy when he finds out another kid was mean to his one day and pulled their hair or called them a mean name and has to bitch to the people in the office about it

They started crying as soon as they got in the car from being picked up and Duncan’s heart hurts so bad

They’re so tiny and young and there’s no reason for anyone to be mean to them

He lays with them in their toddler bed and rubs their tummy and pets their hair until they fall asleep

Tells them that sometimes people are mean for no reason and they’re not whatever name they were called and they should never do those things because that’s not how you treat people

He’s obviously still upset about it when he gets into bed with you later that night

He didn’t think his kid would be subjected to the cruel world at such a young age and he hates that he wasn’t there to protect them

“There’s only so much you can do. You did everything you could, and that’s what matters to them. That you love them, and that you’ll always be there for them to talk to.”

Duncan nods but it’s clear that he’s still beating himself up over it

“Donut, if you don’t stop moping I’m gonna have to show you how good of a dad you are by making you another one.”

“.....is that a promise?”

Ok I’m done now I think please send in more hc’s if you think of them dad!Duncan is my lifeline that’s it thanks

Some of you asked to be tagged and idk if you meant just in the sugar daddy fic or in everything so lmk what you meant lmao

@sloppy-little-witch-bitch26 @langdons-rep @avesatanormalpeoplescareme @venusxxlangdon

#duncan shepherd #duncan shepherd x reader #michael langdon #michael langdon x reader #jim mason #jim mason x reader #ahs #hoc #my writing #mine

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alfredosauce50 · 5 years

Text

Who’s the bad guy? (2p + 1p America x reader) 11

Wordcount: 2,182 The reader is referred to as she/her

"Allen, get your ass up! We're gonna go shopping!" You shrilled, slapping your hands all over the big lump under the blanket. Ever since you woke up at around eight this morning, the energy coursing through your veins hadn't subsided. That was obviously because you were an early bird unlike Allen and you loved visiting department stores despite never getting the chance to go on a worthwhile shopping spree in them.

Low groans were muffled against the covers and the man resting under them only rolled around in it to tighten himself in a tighter burrito. "No... 5 more minutes, please..." He mumbled, rubbing his cheek against the pillow. After spending so much of your time with this man, you've come to learn that he loved to sleep in to nearly noon when he didn't have anything planned in the morning. The thought of this bad habit hit you and made you sigh frustratingly.

When his nest of fiery red hair peeked out and pooled around, you dug your hands in them and gave it a good ruffle. "Al, I'm gonna sit on you and squash you with my fat if you don't get up this instant." You threatened with a taunting smile tugging at your lips. He let out a soft chuckle and with that said, he did not bother to move a single muscle. "Go on, do it." He thought with mischief manifesting onto his features in the form of a smirk.

Narrowing your eyes with a scowl, you jumped on him and squeezed your limbs around the shape of his body under the blanket. He let out a grunt and feigned hurt. Those noises made in protest silenced when he rolled onto his back, however. As you enveloped yourself around him like a boa constrictor, he snaked two arms around your neck and pulled you close much to your surprise. Noses pressed together and eyes locked, he held you in this intimate position for a few moments forcing you to stare right into his lazy, half-lidded gaze. He turned his head and brushed his lips against your cheek before giving it a light peck. "I'm up, baby." He moved his warm lips against your skin as he spoke, sending chills to shake through every inch of your body from the feeling. You inhaled sharply and bashed him on the head repeatedly. "Let me go, idiot!" You hissed with a little bit of pink tinting your cheeks. He responded by tightening his arms. "Not till you gimme a morning kiss. You know how much I hate waking up early." He whispered with his brows knitted together. You grumbled something under your breath. Darting your eyes over to the clock standing on the bedside table, it read 9:32AM. You grabbed that while carefully avoiding the prickly potted cactus sitting next to it. Holding it in front of his line of vision for a good second, you then hit his head with it. "It's not early, Al. It's half past nine already." He rubbed his forehead. "And that's pretty early for me. It's all about perspective, dollface." He replied, cupping a hand behind your neck. "Now give Allen some sugar." You rolled your eyes at him and sighed in defeat. You couldn't really escape his iron grip and decided to go along with his whims to stop wasting time. You could be already out there shopping for a nice dress, but no, he was still curled up in bed. Leaning in to give his cheek a quick kiss, he released you and smiled contently. Stretching his arms, he screamed to wake himself up. "I'm up!" An hour later after breakfast was served for the late-riser, the two of you jumped into the backseat of Alfred's car to get to the shopping districts of New York. Even though visiting boutiques and shopping in them were new for Allen and you, you were far more enchanted by the products offered than he was. Of course, if you showed him a good place to have a smoke and beer, he would be all over you. That was not the case this time however, so he just found himself following along after you in a shop filled with glamorous and glimmering fancy dresses. Alfred figured that his cousin's suit could wait until last; it would not take as long. Everything inside was well-lit with the chandeliers dangling from the tall ceiling, brightening up the whole expanse of mannequins and gushing women with dancing arrays of light. The air was also laced with a sweet, feminine scent of perfume, filling you with delight at the pleasant smell. The host of the party let out obnoxious laughs as he watched you browse through the store like a child in a candy store. Under those lively explosive laughs hid a sinister smirk inside, something that manifested in his mind because he knew what he was doing was going to win you in his favour. "This party is gonna be a freakin' blast! Just pick whatever you like because you'll look great in anything!" Alfred exclaimed, patting you on the shoulder. You turned to him with a light blush but smiled brightly at him nevertheless. Your chest was swarmed with warmth once more when he flashed you another one of his toothy grins; those million dollar smiles always managed to make your heart flutter. "Thank you again, Alfred. I honestly cannot express how grateful I am." You gleamed. "Haha, no worries dudette! Just as long as we have fun, am I right?" He nudged you in the shoulder. The blonde bent over so that his mouth would be in level with your ear. The indifferent face of Allen's grew alarmed when he spied the movement from the corner of his eye, twisting over to you two with an enlarged vein on his neck. Gritting his teeth and seething through it, a hot fiery trail burned behind his footsteps as he neared his cousin. "I know you haven't experienced a lot of what we're doing together, but I'm happy to be your firsts for all these things." He whispered, his hot breath entering the shell of your ear to send shivers down your spine. Ripping yourself away from him, you slapped him on the shoulder. "What the hell, Alfred?! It sounds weird when you put it like that!" You hissed under burning cheeks, unaware of the third presence who just joined. The man you conversed with did know, however. Allen knitted his brows together and frowned deeply, unable to fathom the anguish boiling inside. He was already furious at what Alfred said to you, but the reaction you gave him tore at him even more. As you continued to slap Alfred around on the shoulders, he flickered his eyes at the onlooker and narrowed them slyly. The redhead just tore his gaze away and walked off, not wanting to stare any longer into those calculating pools of icy blue. He completely avoided Alfred from that moment on. He was unable to bear a second in his presence and instead just kept close to you. The only time he scraped together the will to utter anything to him was when he was purchasing a suit for the night, a quiet word of thanks before he disappeared into the fitting room to change into the formal attire. Slipping off his bomber jacket after giving himself a good look over, he let the rest of his clothes drop to the ground before he slipped on a crisp white dress shirt. He buttoned that up to feel as if he was being choked but kept everything on for the sake of looking good. After he fastened a belt around his pants, he tightened the dark blood red tie around his collar. Once that was done, he needed to stop himself before he reached for the jacket so he could take a good look at himself. Allen pursed his lips and nodded in approval at his hot reflection. "Oh shit." He mouthed. "I look like a hot businessman." Never mind a hot businessman. This man was a lady killer with the jacket on. He threw on the suit jacket to finish the look, but only slowly to savor a pivotal moment in his life where he would be wearing something formal for the first time. As if the whole vicinity was put on mute, his surroundings were plunged into a suspenseful silence as he shot his arms through the armholes. Pulling down on the ends to straighten it up, he brushed the non-existent dust off his shoulders and grimaced at his reflection. "Oh shit yeah, Allen. You lookin' like a fine snack." He gave himself finger guns. He continued to stare at his front profile for a good ten minutes before he started twisting and turning to get a good idea on how he looked from all angles. Every single degree out of 360 earned the Allen seal of approval. Snickering to himself as he enjoyed his little alone time of self-admiration, the playful smirk curling at his lips faded once his visage wandered back to his neglected bomber jacket splayed on a velvety black chair. His gaze fell down to the small mound of clothes at his feet this time, which consisted of his tank top, jeans, and dog tag. He then glanced back up at his reflection and frowned. Unlike before, he was glaring at the clean white shirt and invaluable suit jacket. It wasn't like he looked terrible in it, but he looked terrible in it. This was ridiculous. The infamous street rat wearing high-end fashion? This unprecedented event was thought to be impossible and the fact that it was taking place right here mocked him. He licked his lower lip and shook his head with a sigh, a dark shadow consuming his features the longer he stared at himself. "Fuck Alfred." He growled lowly. He was already suffering enough by living on his turf in a world of luxury, but now he had to wear this? No matter how much he complained, this was bound to happen. Why? It was your love and fascination for all things glamorous and his own tendency to stick to you like glue. Even so, he blamed his cousin for throwing these useless parties and spending his money without a care in the world. Rolling his eyes at the sound of his explosive, obnoxious laugh echoing in his mind, he clamped a hand over his face and rubbed it to relieve some of the emotions of anguish. It was something that he held pent up in his system for the past few weeks and it was driving him on a road to insanity. Clenching his hands over the frame of the mirror, he glowered at himself with a glint of death. "There better be alcohol." *** Allen was already intoxicated with melancholy when he stepped out of the limo that brought the group to the destination. Ignoring the blinding flashes of cameras from paparazzi on the sidelines, he trailed behind the couple that was you and Alfred with not a trace of emotion showing on his exterior. You clung onto the blonde with a dazzling smile at the cameras that tightened on you both. Albeit a little overwhelmed, you felt significant for once. It was a feeling you never experienced before but you came into good terms with it immediately. As Alfred dragged you off to meet all the faces of cooperations who had more money than God, a mountain of sparkling glasses came into Allen's sight. Inside the large hall that had ceilings stretching up to the sky, there sat his only a bit of salvation amidst hundreds of insignificant party-goers. His prayers were answered with alcohol, and a hell of a lot of it. Gallons upon gallons of champagne drew him to the long table of refreshments to where he gawked at with delight. Liquid gold it was in its finest form. He didn't hesitate to start chugging the supply of drinks offered to the guests and was slowly exhausting all beverages. In exchange for everything he consumed, his logic and coordination were swapped for impaired vision and judgment. Collapsing into a nearby chair with his face flushed bright pink, he was knocked out cold after consuming more than ten pints of it. He was given weird looks because of it, but the spotlight soon moved onto a small group of finely dressed men with their faces hidden under dark masquerade masks near the entrance. "Sirs, this is not a masquerade party. May I kindly ask you to take them off as a security precaution?" One of the burly guards asked. The shortest one of the group peeled his mask off to reveal piercing magenta eyes. Pulling a Beretta out of his pocket, he cocked it and trained it in between the man's eyes enlarged with shock. "How's this for a security precaution?" He growled, his finger pulling the trigger. Blood splattered onto the wall behind as an ear-splitting explosion echoed throughout the grand hall.

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psychospeak-blog · 6 years

Text

Won’t Go Slowly // 52

One // Two // Three // Four // Five // Six // Seven // Eight // Nine // Ten // Eleven // Twelve // Thirteen // Fourteen // Fifteen // Sixteen // Seventeen // Eighteen // Nineteen// Twenty // Twenty One // Twenty Two // Twenty Three // Twenty Four// Twenty Five // Twenty Six // Twenty Seven // Twenty Eight // Twenty Nine // Thirty // Thirty One // Thirty Two // Thirty Three // Thirty Four// Thirty Five // Thirty Six // Thirty Seven // Thirty Eight // Thirty Nine // Forty // Forty One // Forty Two // Forty Three // Forty Four // Forty Five // Forty Six // Forty Seven // Forty Eight // Forty Nine // Fifty // Fifty One

Even though it was only 9:30 and your morning had been hectic up until now, it was really, really peaceful now. Bentley was sleeping soundly in his swing, and you were cooking in the kitchen, the sun streaming through the windows, and you were humming along with the music the swing was playing. Maybe, once you'd finished this and put this in the fridge for later, you'd just make yourself and cup and coffee and curl up on the couch with a book.

It sounded like the ideal morning, you thought, humming to yourself as your phone chimed and you licked a bit of avocado off your finger, checking it.

Tyler: Can I come in?

You: ???

Tyler: I brought you coffee

You were still just trying to wrap your head around this, haphazardly fixing the bun atop your head your head as you hurried towards the front door, unlocking it and pulling it open. Sure enough, Tyler was standing there, looking frustratingly effortlessly put together, two Starbucks cups in his hands.

"You're home," you said dumbly, and he smiled, stepping inside, and setting the cups down on the table you had in your entryway.

"Well, I'm at your house, actually."

"I didn't know you were coming home," you said, and Tyler laughed as he pulled you into a hug, placing a kiss on your cheek, while you just kind of stood there limply, still not quite believing that it was his arms your felt around yours, or his beard brushing against your cheek.

"I told you I was packing, I told you when my flight was," he said.

"Yeah, but I thought you were going on a trip," you said.

"Yeah, I took a trip from Dallas to Toronto."

That wasn't what you meant, though. You meant a vacation, like he usually went on after the season ended, before he came home for the summer. "Are the dogs here?" you asked, and Tyler laughed again.

"They're at my house."

"In Toronto or Dallas?"

"Toronto," Tyler said, "I guess I should have just dropped them off here, then, if you'd rather just see them and not me."

"That's not what I meant," you laughed, and Tyler smiled, turning to shut the door behind him, and then looking back at you, smiling again. "What?" you asked.

"You look beautiful," he said simply, and you laughed.

"Come on, I've probably got huge bags under my eyes, and spit-up on my shirt."

"Yeah, but you look really happy," Tyler said, moving his hands into his pockets.

You smiled back at him. "Yeah. I am really happy."

"Good," he said, just looking back at you, and then he took a deep breath, "whatcha doing?"

"Making guacamole."

"In the morning?" Tyler asked, kicking his shoes off, following you into the house.

"Yeah, it's for tonight."

"What's tonight? Are you having a Mexican fiesta?"

"No," you laughed, rolling your eyes, because you hadn't even thought about dinner at all. Only your snacks. "It's just a healthy fat, so it's really good for me to eat when I'm nursing."

"Is it actually, or are you just using that as an excuse to just eat as much guacamole as you want?"

"Both," you said, shrugging, "I'm really hungry all the time, and I've just been craving it."

"I thought we were done with cravings," Tyler said, "Are you pregnant again, already? I thought you'd maybe wait a bit, but whatever."

"No, I'm not pregnant," you said, shaking your head when he laughed at his own joke. "It's worse than when I was pregnant, actually."

"It's worse?!" Tyler asked, looking rather alarmed by this fact. "Am I going to have to make you grilled cheeses again?"

You swallowed hard, shaking your head. "I don't think I can ever eat grilled cheese again."

"What? Really?"

"Yeah."

"Do you think Bentley will like it?" Tyler asked, "Or do you think he's sick of it, too?"

"He'll probably like it," you said, even though it seemed like a long time before he'd be able to eat a sandwich. "Most kids do."

"'K, well him and I will eat it and you're not gonna be invited."

"Yeah, well, like I said, kids like grilled cheese," you quipped, and Tyler shook his head, pushing you playfully, even though you'd only made that comment mostly because the thought of them eating grilled cheeses together made you feel instantly emotional, and you weren't in the mood for that right now.

"So, do you still start crying for stupid reasons when you actually just need to eat still?" Tyler said, "Because if I'm home for the summer, I really need to be prepared with snacks and stuff if you're gonna be like that."

"No," you said, "But I still do cry."

"What? Why?"

"I don't know, my hormones are still a mess, and I'm sleep deprived."

You didn't realize that Tyler had moved closer to you, until his arms were ghosting around you. "But you're still happy though, right?"

You eased into his open arms, your head resting against his chest as he pulled you close. "The happiest ever," you said, letting him cradle your head and you felt him smile as he pressed his lips to the top of your head. "It's just postpartum stuff, it's a big adjustment, and its tiring. But it's still the best thing ever."

"Yeah," Tyler said softly, "Yeah, I get that. I did bring you coffee though."

He pulled back, eyebrows raised and smiling as he handed you one of the paper cups he'd brought up to your kitchen table without you noticing, pressing it into your open hands. "I got you a caramel macchiato," he said, "I figured you want caffeine and sugar."

"Oh..." you said hesitantly, looking at him, who was expecting you to be grateful. And you were, because it was so nice of him to think of you and bring you coffee, but feeling bad because, if it was just you, you'd just drink it, but you looked hesitantly downstairs, not wanting to put your baby through that discomfort.

"It's with almond milk," he added.

"What? Really?"

"Yeah, I listen to what you say," he grinned.

"I know you do," you smiled back. But you weren't expecting him to remember, not when you had enough trouble remembering yourself.

Of course he would remember.

"Yeah, your friend Brooke was working today so I just told her I needed something without dairy for you, and she said you'd like this, she says hi, by the way."

"Aw, really? Bentley's wearing the onesie she got for him," You said, "It says 'Mama Needs Coffee'."

"Does Mama need coffee?"

"Yeah, Mama always needs coffee," you nodded, taking a grateful sip of your warm drink.

"Good?" Tyler asked.

"Mhmmm," you agreed, leaning back against the counter, looking at him curiously as he flipped his keys around his finger, and then turned behind him, sliding them onto the table to grab his own coffee.

"Did you lose your key to my house again?"

"Nope, it's right there," he said, sipping on his coffee.

"Why didn't you use it?"

"Because I wasn't sure if the baby was going to be waking, and I didn't want to wake him up by accident," Tyler said, "Well, more so I knew you'd get scared and scream and then you'd wake up the baby but blame me."

"Well, he is sleeping, so I guess that's a good thing."

"No, he's not," Tyler said, and you raised your eyebrows in question. "His eyes were open, he was looking at the thingies about his head."

"He is?" you asked, surprised he wasn't crying.

"Yeah, I waved at him when I came in, he didn't wave back though," Tyler said, "Didn't you see that? Or were you just too obsessed with me and you forgot all about your baby?"

"Stop," you laughed, turning away from him, and now trying to finish making your guacamole so you could put it in the fridge before you got distracted, since you weren't sure how long you'd have. Sure enough, you heard him start to do his whiny little cries, a warning sign that he was going to be very unhappy in a moment.

"I can grab him," Tyler said, when you turned to walk towards the living room.

"Yeah, okay," you smiled, "I'll finish what I'm doing here."

Yet, you really couldn't resist peeking through the doorway as you watched Tyler ever so gently undo the straps holding Bentley in his swing, as if the straps just touching his body would hurt him. When Bentley quietened, you went back to finish mixing your guacamole and stuck it in the fridge, but then you caught sight of Tyler who was just leaned over the swing and then he would stand up, and sort of move his arms, and lean back over again, and Bentley was just staring at him, and you bit back a laugh.

"Are you guys okay?" you asked.

"Mmmyeah," Tyler replied quickly, and then looked over his shoulder at you, looking rather sheepish, "I've just never picked a baby up before."

"What do you mean you've never picked a baby up before? You've held him lots."

"Yeah, but someone always handed him to me, I've never actually picked him up off something before."

"Do you want to?"

"Yes," he said, "it's just taking me a minute."

"Yeah, well he's fine, he's not crying."

"Yeah, because he's thinking 'what the hell is this guy doing?'"

"He's fine," you laughed, "It's just the same as taking him when someone hands him to you, just slide your hand under his head and then under his bum, and pick him up."

"I'm trying to, but it's hard when he's in this thing," Tyler said, leaning forward and wiggling Bentley's toe, "Mama will be so mad at me if I drop you or let your head fall off."

"His head's not going to fall off, Tyler," you laughed.

"I meant hurt his neck, or whatever."

"He's stronger now, he doesn't need as much support, just a little bit, you'll be fine," you said, walking back into the kitchen because you didn't want to hover over him and make him even more nervous, even though you did peak again, watching him lovingly pick the baby up, holding him out in from of him a only a little awkwardly, Bentley's legs resting up against Tyler's body, and he bounced him a little. You went to start tidying up the kitchen, hearing Tyler talking to the baby softly, and then saying to you, "He feels even smaller than last time."

"Yeah, well he's bigger," you said.

"I know, he's always on your boob," he said, walking into the kitchen now, "I just meant, I forgot how small he is. Do you need to feed him now?"

You looked at Bentley, who still looked happy, and then at the clock, "Probably not, he just ate like an hour ago. He's just awake."

"Oh, yeah, I'm not used to him being awake and not wanting to eat."

"Yeah, he's awake more often now," you said, cleaning up the kitchen, "Usually I put him under his play gym in the morning."

"Oh, did you wake up so you could show me your toys?" Tyler asked the baby, bending down to kiss his head, and then turning him a little in his arms, "What happened to his hair?"

"Oh, it started falling out," you said.

"What? He's going bald already?"

"It'll grow back."

"I'll buy you hair plugs if you want, don't worry, bud.'"

"You're ridiculous," you laughed.

"You're ridiculous," he responded, sticking out his tongue at you.

You smiled, taking another sip of your coffee now that you had wiped the counter down. "We can go hang out in the living room, if you want."

"'K, can you bring my coffee?"

"Yeah," you said, already grabbing it, and setting both down on the table, and then pulling Bentley's things out into the middle of the living room.

"Do you want him to go down there?"

"If you're done holding him."

"He wants to play," Tyler said, handing him over and you scooped him up, your hands coming under his legs, going to put him on his belly propped up on the pillow.

"Do you want to show Uncle Tyler how strong you are?"

"Umm...that's not my name," Tyler said, scooting behind you to get his coffee again, and you looked at him, recounting, but you were certain you'd said the right words. "Say the right one."

You sighed, pulling your drink closer to the end of the coffee table, kneeling down on the carpet. "I don't really like it, Tyler, " you said, as you stretched out on your side on the floor.

"Well, it doesn't matter whether you like it or not, it's my name."

"Well, he can call you that, but I don't really want to."

"Well, he's not gonna learn unless you call me that."

"Okay," you said offhandedly, because you were certain he was doing this only to annoy you, rubbing Bentley's back and putting some toys in front of him so he had something to look at. And then you looked up at Tyler, who was now groaning as he tried to get down on the floor. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm just getting too old to do this."

"You're not old," you quaffed, making faces at Bentley, as he tried to lift his head up.

"Yeah, just wait until you get to be my age."

"You're two months older than me," you said. Which was a little weird, not that you thought about it because, for some reason, you'd somehow forgotten, once you graduated high school, that you were the same age.

You always imagined yourself marrying a guy who was at least a few years older than you.

Then again, you'd always always imagined marriage first, then baby.

"Look at you, dude, you're doing so awesome," Tyler said, and you smiled as he kept just repeating all of Bentley's noises back to him which, you knew would get annoying after a certain point but, for now, it was cute. "Has he been with any other babies his age?" Tyler asked you.

"Has he been with other babies his age?"

"Yeah, like the babies from the moms in your yoga class."

"Oh, no, not yet, but we're gonna do the baby and mama yoga class once I'm allowed to start exercising."

"Oh," Tyler said, "I was just wondering if he can lift his head up higher than other babies his age."

You half-laughed and half-scoffed. "It's not a competition, Tyler," you said, "Babies all progress at different rates."

"Yeah, of course it's not a competition," he said, "I'd just bet that he's in the top three."

"Oh my god."

"What? You know it's true."

"He's getting strong, it doesn't matter what the other babies are doing," you said, Bentley just kind of giving up, his head flopping down over the pillow and he started crying. "Are you done?" you asked, moving him onto his back, and he pretty much immediately quieted. "He doesn't really like doing tummy time on the floor very much, but if I put him on my chest, he'll lift his head up to look at me."

"Well, yeah, of course he'd rather look at you."

You wanted to tell him to stop, because you didn't know quite how much longer you could handle it. But you caught the way he was looking at you, and you just couldn't say anything, not even when his face moved closer, like he was going to kiss you. And you wondered if this could just be your entire life now, lying on the floor with them in the mornings, just drinking your coffee.

And then Bentley's noises broke through, and you both turned back to him.

You were both smiling.

"What's up? Whatcha want to show me?" Tyler asked, sticking his head next to Bentley's and looking up at all the toys. "Oh yeah, this is cool.....oofff," Tyler said, squinting as Bentley's errant fist hit him in the head, "Okay, this is your tent, you don't want me in it, I got it," he said, scooting his head back again. "He actually does look bigger on his back like this, he's got a belly," Tyler said, settling his fingers over it, and Bentley cooed. "Is he smiling at me?" Tyler asked, looking over at you, his eyes looking watery like he was going to cry.

"Kinda, yeah," you said, "He hasn't really smiled yet, he can only see to do it on one side."

"Can he hold stuff?" Tyler asked, not even waiting for your answer before he picked up a toy off the floor, molding Bentley's hand around it. "Oooh, it makes noise, is that cool?"

You laughed though, as the soft toy fell, bouncing off of Bentley's forehead and he just blinked.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Tyler laughed, picking up the toy, which you thought was a raccoon or something, and setting it next to him. "I'll just put it here, so you can look at it if you want."

Tyler got up on his knees, taking about sip of coffee, and then you watched as he crawled towards the little basket you'd filled with some of Bentley's toys, but you hadn't really organized a play area for him quite yet. "What are you doing?" you laughed.

"Just seeing what he's got," he said, pulling a couple of things out of the basket.

"He's probably a bit too little for those yet, Tyler."

"Will they hurt him?" he asked, looking up at you.

"No, they won't hurt him, he just might not be interested in them quite yet."

Tyler mumbled a little affirmative noise, laying back down on his back and holding the soft little book thing above both of their faces. "This doesn't even have words."

"Yeah, there are little things they can open and stuff, and the book crinkles. I think the bear squeaks, too."

"Oooh," Tyler said, squeaking it and then watching Bentley for his reaction. "This bear's gonna eat the fish, 'k, watch?" He said, making little nibbling noises as he mimed like the bear was eating the fish teether. "Do you think he'll be able to play with this stuff this summer?"

"Oh yeah, he'll probably get into it in the next month," you said, looking at the baby, and then at Tyler, "Are you staying?"

"What do you mean, am I staying?" he asked, "I'll have to go home to the dogs to feed them in a bit, they were all sleepy this morning 'cause we got in really late last night."

"No, I mean are you staying here, in Toronto," you said, "Usually you go on a trip after the playoffs, or in the summer."

"Ah...I don't really have anything planned yet," he said, rolling onto his side to look at you. "I kind of feel like more of a quiet summer, honestly. I just want to get settled in. "

And you realized, just in that moment, you weren't just in love with him.

You wanted to raise a family with him.

"Rawr," Tyler said, and you watched him with the bear toy in hand, crawling it up Bentley's arm. But, the next thing you knew you were squealing as Tyler toppled you over.

"Oh no, the bear's getting Mama," he said, shoving the bear all over your face, and then he started making kissing noises, planting the bear on your cheeks and forehead. "Oh, it's a nice bear."

You laughed, partly out of surprise and partly because Bentley was just kind of staring at the direction of the ruckus. But Tyler must have taken it that you were laughing at him, because he kept doing the kissing thing with the bear, and then he kissed you himself, on the forehead, laughing as brushed the scraggly pieces of hair that had fallen out of your bun away from your face. And then, so quickly you couldn't be sure it even really happened, his lips brushed yours.

Except, you were pretty sure it had actually happened, because you could still feel where his lips were chapped on your own lips, and your body was following his as he jumped back away from you. "I should..uh...," he said, flipping his hat forwards and then backwards again, leaning back in quickly, "Watch your head," he mumbled, his hand cupping the back of your head, sitting up with you to avoid hitting your head on the coffee table.

"What were you saying?" You asked dreamily, as if you had actually hit your head.

"Oh, uh, just that I should probably head home to the dogs. Soon."

"Oh, yeah, right, of course," you said, occupying yourself with moving that bear toy back onto the play mat.

But he didn't leave, not when you had to change Bentley's diaper, or when you changed him into something warmer in the hopes he'd take a nap after he nursed, or even when you were feeding the baby, Tyler was just laying on the floor still, absently fiddling with the toys still. It wasn't until you stood up, rocking Bentley to sleep that Tyler stood up as well, grabbing the onesie you'd left abandoned on the floor.

"Can I take this?" Tyler asked, the garment looking extremely small in his hands.

"Can you take it?" you repeated, and he nodded. "There's clean ones in his room, I was going to put it in the wash."

"Yeah, I know, I meant for the dogs."

You frowned, looking down at it and then back up at Tyler's face. "It's not gonna fit any of the dogs, it's too small."

Now, he giggled, "I meant for them to sniff it," he said, and you realized your mommy brain was much worse than you thought. "I read it helps dogs, to get them used to a new baby."

You smiled now. "Yeah, you can take it," you said. "There's some blankets in my room, too, he was wrapped in if you want to take those, too."

"Yeah, okay," he said, looking down the hallway to your room and then back to you again, "I gave them the shirts I was wearing when I was holding him at the hospital and stuff when I got back to Dallas."

"Awe, you did?"

"Yeah, I meant to ask you for some of his blankets or something but I forgot. So I don't really know if they could even smell him, or if they just thought I was giving them my dirty laundry."

"I'm sure they could smell him," you said, smiling down at Bentley. "When do you want them to meet?"

"Doesn't matter, it's up to you."

"Today?" you asked, "If you're not doing anything?"

"You think that's enough time for them to get used to him?"

"Yeah, Charley met Bentley without doing the scent thing, and he was fine."

"Well, Charley's one dog, and he's not Gerry."

"He acts like Gerry."

"Yeah, because Gerry gets him all riled up."

"They'll be fine, Tyler, they're good dogs."

"You having been living with them for a few months, you haven't seen what they've been doing."

"Okay, but they don't attack people, they're not gonna attack him."

"No, not on purpose, but they've never really been around babies, I don't know how they're gonna react."

"They'll be okay, it's not like he has to lay on the floor or anything, we'll just see how they do."

"Yeah, okay," he said, "When do want me to bring them?"

"We can come to your house," you said, "I've been in my house a lot lately, it'd be nice to get out again."

"Will that be okay, for Bentley though?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't it be?"

"I just thought it'd be better if he was in his own house, so he feels secure," Tyler said, and you laughed.

"He's like four weeks old, I don't think he knows where he is, just whether I'm there or not."

"Yeah, okay," he said, "I'll take the dogs out for a walk to get some of their energy out, so just come over whenever you want and if we're not there, we'll be there soon."

"Okay," you said, watching him curiously when he just continued to stand there. "I thought you were going."

"I am," he said, "I'm just a little hesitant to take them for a walk, they're gonna drag me to to your house."

"They'll be fine," you laughed.

"They were looking for you last night, in my house," Tyler said seriously, smiling a little, "I don't think you have any idea how much they missed you."

"Awe, they did?"

"Yeah, of course. They're gonna be so stoked to see you and have our summer crew back together again," Tyler said, and then, "Okay, don't cry, you're gonna see each other soon."

"I know, I'm not crying, that's just sweet. You're sure they were looking for me?"

"Yeah, who else would they be looking for?" he laughed, "I'll see you guys in a bit, 'k?"

"Okay," you said, already thinking about how you were going to take a nice warm shower, now that Bentley was asleep.

So you did just that, even taking the time to blow dry your hair, before you got Bentley's things ready and the stroller all packed up. And then you got Bentley changed again which, was probably a little excessive, but you didn't know he was doing to be meeting the dogs today, and you needed him in one of his many bodysuits that had dogs on them.

You needed plenty of pictures of this.

"You want to go see some puppies, Bentley?" You asked, pressing your lips to the top of his head as you walked into Tyler's driveway, one hand on the stroller. "Mama's excited, are you sleeping now?"

You looked up as Tyler opened the front door. "Hey," he said, leaving it open as he walked over to you. "You could have called me if you wanted someone to drive you."

"I like to get out walking with him," you said, "And he hates his carseat, this is way more pleasant."

"That's silly," Tyler said, coming to your side, "it's supposed to keep you safe."

"Is he sleeping?"

"Uh, I think he just woke up, he looks sleepy," Tyler said, "Why'd you bring the stroller if you've got him all wrapped up in there?" He asked, nodded towards where you had Bentley held against you in the baby wrap.

"Because he was in the stroller, but he wasn't happy. And it's easier, with his diaper bag," you said, "plus, I've got the bassinet attachment on, so if he falls asleep and we want put him down somewhere, he can just go in here."

Tyler held up his hands, grinning, "Okay, I guess you got it all figured out. The dogs are in the back so you guys can come inside," he said, followed by a very apparent bark coming from the backyard. "I think you should probably go say hi to them by yourself first, then come inside by yourself so you're holding Bentley and I'll bring them in."

"Okay," you said, working Bentley out of the baby wrap, and into Tyler's outstretched arms.

"Hey, little man, how was your walk?"

You smiled, taking the carrier off yourself and setting it in the stroller, following Tyler as he walked through the house towards the back door.

"Jesus," Tyler said harshly and in a low voice, and for a moment you thought Bentley had spit up or something, even though it wasn't like he'd just ate or anything. But then you realized that Gerry was jumping up against the glass door, his tongue hanging wildly out of his mouth, while Cash's entire body seemed to be wagging, not just his tail, trying to navigate how he could get past Gerry to the door, while Marshall had his head tilted, his tail wagging, eyes connected with yours, waiting for you to open the door.

"Hi guys," you said, which only made Gerry's paws slam even harder against the glass.

"Gerry!" Tyler whispered harshly, giving him stern eyes through the door, their tails wagging quicker as you walked closer, and you looked back at them and then back at the dogs.

"Sit," you prompted, "Gerry, sit, and then I'll come out."

You opened the door slowly as you told them to stay, but it didn't really matter because they were way more interested in you then what was inside the house.

"Hi, hi," you said excitedly, embracing the happy bundle. "I missed you guys so much, did you miss me?"

You spat, as someone's tongue came to your lips, and then you were squealing once again, as you were pushing onto your back, and then Gerry proceeded to walk up your body.

"Oh my god, you're just like your dad," you said, trying to stop his nails from digging into you, while also giving Marshall attention, and then all of you looked up when you heard a knock on the window.

"Gerry, get off her," Tyler said, and you sat up when he jumped off.

"C'mere, Cash," you said, extending your arms towards the pup, who was just standing there with his tail wagging, watching the whole thing unfold, and you rubbed his ears, placing a kiss atop his forehead. "Oh, you sweet, sweet boy."

Once the dogs had seemed to calm down a little, you slipped back inside, taking Bentley back from Tyler and then going to sit down on the couch in the living room.

"Give them treats, Tyler."

"I'm not giving them treats, then they'll associate the baby with food."

"Yeah, that's a good thing."

"No, it's not, then they might think the baby's food."

"No, they won't," you said, smiling at Bentley, who seemed to be taking in his new environment. "They're being patient, I told them to wait."

You heard Tyler sigh, but you also heard him rummaging in the treat bag, and then you heard him go back outside.

"You wanna meet your big brothers?" You asked Bentley, "you're gonna have so much playing with them someday, and they're going to have so much fun playing with you."

You sat back just a little when you heard the door open and Tyler telling them to wait, but then you started laughing when the dogs came into the room, their leashes extending back to Tyler's hand.

"I don't think you needed to put them on leashes," you said, but Tyler gave you a weary look, so you let it go. All the dogs were panting and pulling at their leashes, probably not entirely sure what was going on.

"Be really gentle," Tyler said, letting them a little closer, and Gerry jumped suddenly, his nails scraping your jeans, and then you think Marshall tried to get in his way, their leashes tangling. Tyler was scolding Gerry and trying to pull him back, so you reached down, unclipping Marshall's leash. "Babe .."

"He'll be fine," you said, petting Marshall's neck, and then you put both your arms back around the baby, turning sideways so they could investigate the little thing in your arms. "This is Baby Bentley."

Marshall looked at him a moment and then immediately laid down, his eyes locked on yours and his tail still wagging, and then Cash sniffed his leg a little bit and then walked away, turning around and sitting down.

"Good boys," you said, and then extending your arm out a bit. "Gerry, you want to see him?"

He came over to you eagerly, searching out your hand, but then Bentley made a noise as he stretched his arms out and Gerry seemed to realize that you weren't just holding an object, and immediately backed up.

"Gerry, what's this?" Tyler said, already having dropped Cash's leash, pointing to Bentley's foot. "Look, he's got puppies on his feet."

Gerry did sniff him a little bit, and then Bentley's foot moved, and he turned, walking around Tyler.

"Well, that was anticlimactic," Tyler said dryly.

"Well, they probably just don't want to hurt him, Tyler," you said, turning Bentley so he was laid out on your legs, and Gerry spun Tyler around, who was now giggling, trying to get as far away as possible with his leash on.

"I think Gerry's scared of him," he snickered, crouching down beside him.

"They'll get used to each other," you said, pulling your legs up as you turned sideways on the couch, and now Cash walked a little closer, only to lay down against the couch. "Good boy," you murmured, one foot dropping off the couch to rub him, resting Bentley on your chest now do you could rub Marshall's ears, who was still laying on the floor by the couch, up by your head now.

You snuggled up, watching the hockey Tyler had on T.V., the evening going by quicker than you'd realized, so now Tyler was in the kitchen, pulling something you'd left frozen in his freezer for dinner, because he hadn't gone shopping yet.

"Babe..." Tyler laughed, "are you serious?"

"Huh?"

"You alphabetized all the spices?"

"Oh, yeah," you said absentmindedly, and Tyler came back into the living room, leaning in.

"Yeah, so we got in last night and all I want to do is get changed and go to bed, and it's like the weirdest robber broke into my house and rearranged all my clothes," he said, "and it's weird, because my mom said she wasn't here, my dad definitely didn't do that, and the only person with a key is you."

"You said I could borrow your clothes while I was pregnant, and then I was just here, and I couldn't sleep so I just did it."

"Yeah, I said you could borrow my clothes or my freezer, not nest my whole house," he laughed, "and when am I getting my clothes back, by the way?"

"When I don't look pregnant anymore," you grinned, and Tyler looked rather defeated, and you laughed shifting a little when Bentley started to cry.

It was like clockwork.

You frowned, however, your head turning to the side, looking at Gerry, who was now howling from where he was sitting across the room, like you'd never heard before.

"Oh dear god," Tyler said, "what the fuck is he doing?"

You shrugged, shifting with Bentley a little.

"Shut up, Ger," Tyler said. And he did, for a moment, until Bentley started fussing a little louder.

"Do you think he's gonna do that every time he cries?"

"I have no idea."

"Because Bentley's cry isn't even annoying, like some baby's are, it's like, little," Tyler said, "but what Gerry's doing is insane."

"Yeah," you said, standing up and walking with the baby. Marshall barked, and for a second you thought all hell was going to break loose, but Gerry laid down.

"Suck up," Tyler mumbled, and then went back into the kitchen. You'd eaten dinner mostly one handed as Bentley still fussed but nobody seemed to mind, and Tyler had moved gerry's pillow so it was halfway closer, although he was still eyeing Bentley wearily.

Marshall just kept looking up at you, and Cash stayed in his spot until you started to feed Bentley, when he'd practically laid on top of Marshall to get to your feet. You'd invited Marshall up on the couch afterwards, when you'd started watching Grey's Anatomy, taking Bentley's hand and watching his expression as you ran it over Marshall's, who laid there just as still as possible as you did so. "That's a good boy," you said, running your knuckles across his snout.

Somehow, it had gotten much later than you'd realized, so you'd had to feed Bentley again, and then you'd changed him and swaddled him up, putting him in his stroller and rocking it back in and forth while Tyler got the dogs ready to go so they could walk you home.

The walk was fairly quiet, a side from Bentley crying and Gerry's fascination with the stroller, but he slept for the last half of the walk and, when you got home, you ever so carefully asked him out of the stroller, walking quickly to the rocker in your bedroom to try and get him back to sleep, while Tyler took care of the stroller, smiling when he came back in the room at Cash laying at your feet again.

"Is he gonna back you less stressed or more stressed if he stays?"

You smiled down at Cash, rubbing him with you foot again. "He can stay."

"'K, I'll see you guys tomorrow, " he said, leaning over to kiss you on the forehead. "C'mon, boys."

Cash didn't even attempt to move.

Not then or when you put Bentley in his bassinet.

It wasn't until you came out of the bathroom after having gotten ready for bed that he was laying at the base of the bassinet. You smiled, stepping over him and into your unmade bed.

"C'mhere, Cash," you said, patting the mattress until he jumped up. "You can keep an eye on him from up here."

You pushed the bassinet just far enough away from your bed that he couldn't climb it, just in case, and then curled your body around the dog, rubbing his side evenly.

It was the best sleep you'd had since Bentley was born.

#wont go slowly #Tyler Seguin #tyler seguin imagine #nhl imagine #nhl imagines #nhl fanfiction #hockey imagine #hockey imagines #hockey fanfiction

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dammitadolfnomorecake · 5 years

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👑🏰⚔️🐲🗡 DMODT 82 full

Days slipped by before Eren realised, on the rare day he even managed to escape princely duties in their entirety, but for the most part, he was just as married to his paperwork as when it'd all been first delivered. The letters and correspondence from Europe was still frustratingly irregular. He'd given up asking for anything, and now had a plan of his own. He wasn't going to let a stomach bug or people across the world get in his way any longer. Heading up to the sunroom, Levi was on Armin duty. Mikasa's squad was on extended wilderness training with new recruits, leaving the alpha to play bodyguard for the blond beta who'd thought a lack of Mikasa would mean a lack of duties. Levi was almost merciless, threatening to bill Armin for his wasted time. Letting himself into the room, Armin was grumbling as he jotted down something that seemed to be whatever Levi was saying. Creeping across to his mate, Armin ruined the surprise "Eren! Help me, he's making me work harder than Mikasa does" Looking back over his shoulder, Levi's face lit up. Viren on his shoulder, beginning to babble at the sight of him. Swooping in, Eren swept Viren out of Levi's arms, pressing kisses to his son's tiny hand "Hello, my baby. Has daddy been working Uncle Armin hard?" Viren babbled on, squealing as Eren blew a raspberry against his cheek "I have not" "Eren, he was literally boring me to death. I don't know why we have to have a ball. I don't want to have a ball. He keeps telling me about aristocrats. I know them all! And he mentions the same ones..." "I do not" Turning back to Armin, Levi crossed his arms. Eren hadn't mentioned Levi's memory problems to anyone else, and now it seemed like it had struck again "You..." Eren held his finger to his lip, telling Armin to be quite as he tried to express the same thing with his expression. If Levi knew, he'd worry "Never mind. It must be the ball stressing me out. Did you need something, Eren?" "I wanted to borrow Levi for a moment, if that's ok?" "Yes! I mean, yes. Please. No more papers" Correcting his enthusiasm, Armin's eyes shone with relief. Reaching his hand out, Levi turned to take it "Not that isn't a pleasant surprise, but it's too early for lunch" "We're not going to lunch. It won't take very long, then you'll be back to telling him all about that royal protocol of yours" Scrunching his face up, Armin covered his ears "If you two are having a quickie, I don't need to know. Keep him as long as you need" Laughing Armin off, Eren pulled Levi along with him. The alpha happy to follow despite not knowing what was happening. Realising they were near the royal library, Levi pulled him to a stop. The alpha gently pushing him up against the wall. Both hands travelling to Eren's waist as Levi nipped at his neck, carefully minding Viren as he did "If you wanted my help, why didn't you just say so?" "Because maybe I wanted to drag you off and have my way with you?" "Not in front of the baby" Said baby grabbed for his daddy's hair, pulling firmly towards his mouth "That's daddy. You can't eat daddy" Extracting Levi's hair for him, Levi eyed the wet locks with a sigh "He's lucky he's adorable" "He looks just like you" Viren's hair was just as black as Levi's, the green in his green-grey eyes now faded. Not quite Levi's shade, but more Levi's than Eren's. his lips though, they were all Eren's "Poor kid" "Hey, I like the way you look. Anyway, this shouldn't take long" "Then how about that quickie?" "Maybe. It depends how you're feeling" Raising an eyebrow, Eren shook his head "You have to wait and see" Nicollo looked unimpressed. Apparently he and Levi were late, while Moblit was overly enthusiastic as the pair met them just inside the library doors. Passing Viren over to Moblit, Eren squatted down to kiss Luca on the forehead. His son having the most important role in what was coming. Levi was plain confused as to what was going "Eren, care to explain?" "Oh. Yeah, about that. We're getting married right now" "Yeah. Right. What's going on here?" Rolling his eyes, Eren stood, speaking slowly for Levi once he was facing him "We are getting married. Nicollo and Moblit are our witnesses. Europe hasn't signed off by I'm sick to death of waiting on them all the time. I want to marry you, so here we are" Blinking at him, Levi still seemed doubtful "It's true. Eren came and brought us here without an explanation, said we had to wait for you to arrive because he needed witnesses and someone to let the minister in. He couldn't simply ask his friends like a normal person" "We're getting married? Here? Like this?" "Yep. It's fine. The papers are all drawn up" "I thought. What? You wanted a big wedding... what is... what?" Wrapping his arms around Levi, Eren smiled down at his poor confused mate "I want to marry you. Do you want to marry me?" "I do. But what about the chapel? And all the people you wanted to invite, and you're not... there's no flowers. You're not even wearing a robe. I'm not dressed..." Eren couldn't stand the castle chapel. That had been a big fat nope when he'd talked to the minister about all of this. It wasn't the same man who'd presided over his wedding to Zeke, but he'd heard the castle rumours of how his wedding night had gone with the man, and was sympathetic over the fact he wasn't actually supposed to marry. Given Eren wasn't making a huge deal over it all, he'd signed off on it. After that, he'd enlisted outside help to have rings made for him and Levi, now tied around Luca's neck by a red ribbon. His son having been forced to listen to his rambling plans to marry, and thankfully Luca could keep a secret "Levi, we can have another wedding at a later time. I want to marry you. I'm sick to death of waiting for permission. We're practically married anyway" "We don't have rings" "We have rings and witnesses. Europe was probably leaving me hanging as a jab after speaking my mind, and I'm sick of them" "So we're getting married. Are you sure?" "I'm completely and totally sure" "You picked a time when Mikasa wasn't here on purpose, didn't you?" "That's just an added bonus" Mikasa would attempt to mother him. She'd want everything perfect and make a fuss out everything. She'd probably turn into some kind of scary monster who'd yell over even the slightest thing going wrong, or tell him that he had his whole life to think of "You won't regret this?" "Levi, I could never love another alpha like I love you. You're my mate. You're the most amazing father to our boys. And you're the one I want to sort all my shit out with. I want my shit to be your shit, and your shit to be mine, and I want to work all this shit out with my husband by my side. Plus, the sex is great" Levi snorted at him, his smile wide as he realised that Eren was completely serious over all of this "The sex is pretty great" "I know right. I want to wake up with you. I want to fight and make up with you. I want to spend every damn day loving you, even if we're fighting and I secretly want to turn you into a frog. I want to lay on the grass and draw stupid flying eyebrows with you. Make you laugh and hold you when you're upset. Build a home and family with you, then grow fat, old, and lazy and know you're legally stuck with me. I want it all" "You're too fucking much. I want it to. I want everything you'll give me. So give me all of you? Let me be your husband, and I promise I'll be there for you. When you cry. When you're driving me insane. When you get so excited that you talk way too fast and I can barely understand you. When you get fat. When we're up all night with the kids. I'll be with you for all of it" "You guys do realised the minister is supposed to lead this ceremony, don't you? Idiots" Laughing at Nicollo's bad mood, Eren nodded at his mate "We have a lot to still sort out, but yes. Yes. I do. I, Eren Yeager, take you to by my lawfully wedded husband. Through whatever happens. Always and forever" "And I, Levi Ackerman, take you to be my lawfully wedded husband. Through whatever happens. Always and forever, brat. I do" Leaning up to kiss him, Levi's lips were soft against his. The kiss long and languid, turning Eren weak at the knees. Sharing the kiss for several long moments, the moment was ruined by the minister clearing his throat "He is right. I am supposed to proceed over the ceremony, but I suppose all the important things have been said. I pronounce you "Husband and Husband", you may resume kissing your husband as your witnesses sign the marriage certificate" Nicollo muttered something about "finally", while Luca trilled at him. His son standing up with his feet on Eren's hip in order to headbutt his arm "Fuck. The rings. Thank you, baby boy" Releasing Levi, Eren untied the ribbon around Luca neck. High on happiness, he started giggling as he slipped the two bands into his hand "You're such a good boy. Your mother forgot the most important bit" "The minister forgot them too" Defending himself, the man sounded slightly ruffled "It's not exactly a conventional wedding" "It's fine. Thank you. Levi, stick your hand out for me" "So romantic" "I am" Holding his hand out, Eren slid the golden band onto Levi's ring finger. Both bands were a thin gold dragon in the form of an ouroboros with its tail in its mouth. He'd thought about something more complicated, but given he wanted to live a simple and normal life, he chose something simple and something that the jewellers could pull off in a relatively short time. Taking the second ring, Levi slid it into Eren's ring finger, before taking his hand and raising it to his lips "Always..." Kissing Eren's hand, Eren finished the sentence, his hand husband was taking his breath away all over again with the love radiating across his face "and forever. I love you" "I love you. God. I have no words for how much I love you" "If you two are done, you need to sign this. I refuse to bare witness to the consummation of your marriage" "Thank you, Nicollo" Waving him off, Nicollo strode from the library to leave Moblit standing on his own looking awkward "Don't worry, Moblit. I'll take Viren back once the paper is signed. I'm sure we don't need to have the marriage consummation witnessed" "I... thank god. No offence" Playfully growling, Levi hefted Luca off Eren so he was sitting in front of them "You've already seen him naked. Are you trying to say something is wrong with my omega? That he isn't attractive enough for you?" Poor Moblit turned beet red, stuttering as he waved his free hand "No! No. No. I've seen more than I needed to. I also don't want to die right now" "Levi won't kill you. He's joking. Seriously, thank you for this. I knew I could count on you" A smile tugged on Moblit's lips, snuffed out a moment later when Levi growled again "Who says I won't kill him?" "Me. Who's gonna look after Hanji if Moblit's gone?" "Good point. You've dodged a bullet for now" "Levi, stop picking on him. I'm sorry Moblit. He goes a bit silly when he's happy" Moving towards where the minister was standing with the marriage certificate, Moblit moved with him. He wanted to smile. Eren knew he wanted to smile, but Levi could be scary and alpha's pheromones had taken on an air of warning "R-right" "Who says I go silly?" "I do. Now sign the paper" Having signed the certificate, the minister promised to file it away where it would be "found" in a few months time. Once Eren's 6 months of hell had passed. There were 3 months left. 3 months too many. Taking Viren off his shoulder, Moblit finally relaxed "Congratulations. To both of you. I'm really happy for you" "Thank you. And thanks for everything Moblit. Thank you for being here, and for... just everything. I wouldn't have Viren if you hadn't helped Levi. I wouldn't have survived those bandits if not for you. You're a really good guy. I hope you and Hanji are next to be wed" Flushing red again, Moblit was quick to awkwardly flee the room, the minister following and leaving the four of them alone "So... we're married now" "We are. You have to put up me for life" Slipping his hands around him, Levi ground up against him "You make it sound like a bad thing. I can't believe you hid all of this from me" "I wanted to make sure everything was organised before my heat. I didn't want to get your hopes up, then have to cancel it all" "I think you deserve some kind of punishment for your deception" "Mmm... that sounds amazing, buuuut the kids are watching" Levi was more than in the mood, and all Eren could think of was being bent over and fucked into oblivion by his husband "Think Armin will babysit?" "I think Armin will babysit if it means getting out of paperwork for the spring ball" Luca whined at the pair of them, Eren giggling as he looked down at him "I'm sorry baby. Your father is a romantic idiot and your mother is just as bad. Do you want to come see Uncle Armin? I bet he misses you" Luca seemed to frown at him "You don't want to see Uncle Armin? Then what do you want baby? Do you want to play with your brother? Or do you want something to eat?" Nodding at the last option, Eren supposed he should have figured as much. Luca was basically a bottomless pit "Ok, baby boy. Why don't we have lunch, then we can see Uncle Armin. I bet he'll be up for playing" Nodding again, Luca "lu'd" at Levi "He wants you to cuddle him. You haven't told him he did a good boy" Levi released him, though his fingers lingered for an extra moment before lifting Luca up, cradling their son so he could rest his head on his shoulder "He did so good. I'm so proud to be your father" Nuzzling into Levi's neck, Levi kissed Luca's temple. The dragon was longer than the alpha was tall now, not that that stopped Luca from loving cuddles "We'll see Uncle Armin, then I need to borrow mummy for a bit" "Only a bit?" "You'll be bit" Bumping Levi with his hip, Eren walked off in front of him "I'll believe it when I see it" "We've only been married for minutes and you're already impossible" Giving a non-committal hum. Eren wanted to scream it from the rooftops, instead he'd have to just settle for screaming Levi's name when they finally fell between the sheets. * Having a secret husband was nice. Levi hadn't forgotten the wedding a fortnight ago, so that was nice, and their friends thought they'd simply picked their rings up in Europe. On the other side of things, the happiness of having a secret husband was affected by Viren cutting his first tooth. Feverish and pained, his son was miserable. Eren was miserable from being unable to help him. Cutting a tooth was natural, his magic didn't seem to think it worth healing the space. Or it couldn't heal the space until the tooth was actually through. Holding his boy, Eren hushed him as he cried. The ball was tonight, leaving him looking after the children so Levi was available to help with the final preparations. Isabel and Farlan had already arrived, stopping by to surprise them, then taking Levi, and Luca, off his hands so Eren could focus on Viren. He'd tried herbal relief for his son, but what Viren had thrown it back up it'd turned his own stomach so hard that Eren had thrown up too. Levi ordering him straight to bed where he'd had to wait until Viren was cleaned up again for extra cuddles. Thinking at first his sickness was stress related. Eren realised he was an idiot. Viren was six months and his heat hadn't come. Viren was six months, his heat hadn't come, and he was throwing up over certain things and certain smells. Viren was six months old, his heat hadn't come, but his libido was sky high. Sometimes for no damn reason at all. Oh look, Levi breathed, better pop a boner right there. Between that and not being sick all the time... it was enough for him to be worried when he did the maths. Add an increased libido, small swell, and a two and bit week late heat... he knew. He didn't know how exactly to explain what he felt, but he knew. The heat he'd hadn't thought a heat at the loss or Obsydin had been a real heat. He'd also fashioned himself a pregnancy test in the bathroom, based on the same principles as the compatibility test as he'd figured if he was carrying Levi's pup again than there should be some of their pup's blood in his own. It took a bit of him and a bit of Levi to make a baby after all. After placing the few drops of his blood in the bowl, he'd been too chicken shit to look. He probably could have just gone to the castle healers for confirmation, yet... he wasn't sure if he wanted to know. Feeling the slightest of fevers lingering in his pup, Eren glanced at the bathroom door. He was supposed to be shower, but the test was in there... God. He couldn't avoid it. If Levi checked the bathroom when he returned, he'd want to know what was going on. He had to face what was waiting. The results of the test were confusing. A big drop then lines radiating off it. Pouring the mess down the sink, Eren didn't know what to think. He was fairly sure he was... the keyword being fairly, but with the ball preparations taking up everyone else's time, he didn't want to call Levi away to discuss the matter. His mate hadn't even noticed they'd missed his heat, which stung. Sure, they'd been through a whole shit storm and a half, but this was his heat. His "first" heat since giving birth. He'd been nervous as hell over falling pregnant during it, stocking up on his contraceptive herb mix, only for Levi not to notice when it passed by. Not that he wanted Mikasa and Armin keeping track of his heat, but they'd failed to do to the math too, his omega's nose put out of joint that none of them seemed to care Viren was now 6 months. Catching Viren's hand as he grabbed from the taps, Eren pressed a kiss to his soft black hair "That's mummy's mess. You Mister, you're having a shower with mummy before daddy and Luca come back. Heaven only knows what I'm going to tell your father about all of this" Starting to cry again, Eren sighed to himself, kissing Viren's cheek then remembering it was the sore side when his boy let out a wail. The joys of parenthood. Still in the shower when Levi returned, the alpha wandered into the bathroom with a smile on his lips. Not quite what Eren had expected given Levi was busy brushing up on his own days of being a prince with Armin and Mikasa. Leaning back against the bathroom counter, his alpha waved at Viren "Hello, baby. How is my handsome man doing?" Bouncing Viren against him, the boy had his hand in his mouth as he drooled "He's not happy. Mummy was an idiot and kissed his sore cheek" "Aw, my poor man. Herbs still not helping?" "I don't want to risk overdosing him. He likes the shower, so he's quietened down a bit since we got in" Pressing kisses to Viren's hair, Eren didn't want to ever let him go "The ballroom is decorated. We're sitting next to Armin at dinner, the advisors keep insisted you need to be announced as Prince Eren" "They can stick their "insestions" where the sun doesn't shine" "I'm pretty sure that's not a word" "I don't care. I'm not a prince" "And yet, here we are. Do you want me to take him?" "Not really. Mummy is enjoying his cuddles" Levi grabbed a towel off the counter "Mummy needs to finish getting ready, or daddy might have to do something about this" "Ha. Ha. Ha. No. I don't mind holding Viren a little longer" "It's fine. I'll get him ready while you focus on you. Those damn robes have far too many ties" Eren frowned at his mate. His outfit had been sitting over the back of the same dining chair for days now. Not a robe in sight. He was sick of robes. He was wearing pants and Armin could such his dick if he thought otherwise. Well, not really suck his dick. That was Levi's job, and only Levi's job "I'm not wearing my robes" "Armin seemed to think you were" Fucking Armin. If he wants robes, he could wear them him damn self. Reaching out, Levi took Viren from his hold. Bundling the boy up, Levi looked smitten by their drooly son "You really should get dressed soon. You smell good enough to eat" "You've been telling I smell good since we got home" "You do... I haven't been able to keep my hands off you" Months... Well... fuck. Levi's nose had picked the changes in his scent before he did. So much for his dragon senses... "Eren?" "Sorry, thinking about tonight. I'll wash my hair and be right out" "Ok, Sweet Boy. Luca is with Armin, Armin insisted. Though I think that was to distract Mikasa" "And I thought you'd be with Isabel and Farlan..." "They're with Armin too. Armin needs to be measured up for his new fur cloaks" Then Mikasa should have nothing to worry about. Their wilderness training was cut short by Connie rolling his ankle. They'd returned a few days after the wedding with Connie on fashioned crutches, a few of the new recruits suffering blisters and bruising from their armour. Mikasa insisted they didn't need to take a healer... she really should have known better. The female alpha quick to pass the recruits onto someone else, with the word "hopeless" thrown around more than once. Running his hands down his body, they came to rest on his stomach. If he pushed lightly he could feel a small firm mass, hidden visibly by the tiny amount of stomach left from carrying Viren. At first it upset him, but with the way Levi would lavish attention on the spot during sex, he'd gradually come to accept it to, maybe even be a little proud because Levi was right. It was proof of carrying their pup. Their Viren. The precious son he never thought he'd get to birth, and the pup that Luca absolutely adored "Everything alright?" He'd forgotten Levi was there. He definitely hadn't moved to wash his hair like he'd said "Yeah. I was thinking of how much I love Viren, now go get him dressed. It takes effort to look this beautiful all the time" "Liar. Alright, I'll see you in our room" Padding out into their room, Viren was laying on their bed naked, both of them hated having in nappies too long, but he'd thought Levi was going to dress him. Sitting at the dining table, Levi was wiping down his old sword. Having been left alone with his own thoughts for too long, his fears had started to go get to him in the shower. There were going to be far too many people in the ballroom. People watching and whispering... they always did, but with emotions a mess over being pregnant, he wasn't sure he could deal with everyone. What if someone noticed? What if they noticed he wasn't drinking? He couldn't drink as he was breastfeeding anyway... but what if some knew. Levi kept mentioning his scent, and in a room full of all sorts of dynamics, someone could easily pick up the changes in his scent. Or maybe even by making a joke over his heat, Levi might figure it out for himself in front of everyone. Wiping at his eyes, he stumbled over to Levi, his alpha barely pushing his chair back to greet him before Eren was in his lap "L-Levi" Pulling him close, Eren buried his face against Levi's neck, trying to inhale as much of Levi's scent as he could. His alpha worried over whatever this was "Hey, what's wrong?" "I love you... I love you so much" "I love you too. What's with the tears?" "I... think I'm pregnant" Sliding his hands up, Levi took his face in his hands. His thumbs rubbing at Eren's scales as Eren worried his lip and searched Levi's eyes for any kind of answer "You're pregnant? Are you sure? That's... that's... wow" "I think so... I'm sorry" "No! No... no. Wow... another pup" Breaking down to sobs, he sank forward in Levi's hands. Crying hard enough for his body to shake, Eren waited for Levi's words of comfort "Shhhh. You're ok. Whatever it is, you can tell me" Eren let out a miserable sob, verging on a wail. Levi had forgotten. He'd sounded happy... ish? And then he'd forgotten... he needed to remember "I'm pregnant. I think" "Y-you are?" Surging up, Levi sat him on the dining table, tugging the towel around his waist down. Placing both hands on Eren's stomach, the alpha smiled "You're getting fat" Snorting out a less than sexy snot bubbly, Eren pouted "I'm not fat" "No. Not yet. In a year or two we'll have another pup..." Leaning forward Levi kissed his inner thighs "You smell so amazing... sprawled out like this... god" Gone were the hands on his stomach, sliding across to grip his hips. Eren starting to slick under his mate's lusty stare "It's going to be hard not knocking you up, when your heat comes. You're so fucking perfect for me" And there went Eren's heart again. Twice in a row Levi had forgotten. His hands literally on the small swell. Whimpering, he covered his face "What's wrong?" Shaking his head, he wasn't up to repeating the words again. Levi releasing his hips in favour of taking his face again "Are you worried over tonight?" Worried was an understatement. Worried about the pregnancy. Worried about everyone around them. Worried tonight would go horrible wrong like his birthday, but above all, worried Levi forgot such big news twice. He felt like he was going to vomit. Holding his hand over his mouth, he shook his head. Swallowing what he'd thrown up into his mouth tasted revolted, his throat burning, but it all went unnoticed "It'll be ok. Armin had Nicollo make a huge cake to celebrate Luca's birthday, even though it's passed and there's some gifts. It was supposed to be a surprise for us both" Luca's birthday. God. He'd been trying so hard to spend as much time with him as possible, yet it'd never make up for not having a real and proper celebration on the day "Ok... I'm sorry. My nerves... are all over the place" "I can see that. But I'm here, you're not going through all of this alone" He'd forgotten twice in a row Eren had told him he thought he was pregnant, and now Levi was telling him he wasn't going through this alone... it should have been comforting and felt true... now he felt hollow. All he wanted to do was climb into bed with Viren, and cuddle away all his son's pain... but if there was some kind of celebration for Luca, there was no way he was going to miss that. Dressed in a tunic and pants rather than a robe, Eren had Viren on his shoulder and Levi's holding his free hand as they entered the dining room. Announced as Prince Eren of Marley, his royal consort Levi, and their first born Viren, Eren mentally cursed the advisor. Everyone there knew exactly who he was, they didn't need to tear at open wounds. The moment the dining room door opened it was a smack in the face. The scent of the food laid out in as worse than the smell of everyone in the room, Eren nearly throwing up on his feet as he led Levi into the room. When he thought about his symptoms they'd been right in front of his face. Starting with the day he'd thrown up thinking it was from dehydration and stress. He'd thrown up three times during the last week alone, evidently not because his son was suffering. With a smile plastered on his face, Eren played the perfect prince as nodded like he was supposed to during dinner, offering witty comments like the weight of the world wasn't on his shoulders. Seeing Luca the highlight of the night, his son "dressed" in a soft, fur lined vest that Isabel had to be responsible, and on his very best behaviour. With a careful claw he picked neatly at his dinner, then laid his head in Eren's lap while everyone talked. Each time Viren started to grizzle, the dragon would nuzzle into the boy's stomach, ignoring the tiny hand gripping his horn nub. How was he supposed to juggle three children, when Viren still needed him so much? Barely surviving dinner without a breakdown, Levi took Viren into his arms to proudly show their son off. The alpha knew something was wrong, whispering at him to take a break if he felt he needed to. Left without his safety shield, Eren knelt down to gather Luca up, only for Luca to shake his head at him. His son holding himself proudly as he stared up at his mother, loving all the attention he was receiving. Armin was already doing the rounds with Mikasa by his side, stumbling through politely trying to reject the man now shoving his daughter at him. The whole night would pass in such a manner. Rubbing the top of Luca's head he told his son to behave and to be careful, before picking himself back up. Play the prince until they cut Luca's grand looking cake on the far side of the ballroom, then he could retreat to their quarters. And above all, don't throw up and repeat the announcement of his first pregnancy. Casting a gaze across the room, his heart started to beat harder, for a moment his mind muddling the castle with Marley. That night... the awful feeling of not being able to breathe. Zeke sweeping him off his feet to rush him out to a carriage and safety. Not caring about his public image as he and Yelena removed the awful corset and dress enough for him to breathe. He... simply couldn't do this. He needed air. There were too smells. Too many people. Air. As gracefully as he could be under the circumstances, Eren turned to escape, only to crash right into Jean with a plateful of food. The smashing of the plate silenced the room. Squatting down, Eren rushed to try and clean the mess up, tears forming in his eyes as Jean complained about the mess, he too moving to clean. As his hand brushed over Eren's, it was like a jolt of wrongness. Eren jerking his hand back as he met Jean's eyes. It was shameful to show the alpha such a sad expression. Blurting out he was sorry, Eren strode from the room as the party resumed. His skin still felt it was tingling from Jean's touch. Making his way to the first bathroom he found, Eren shut himself in. Running the water a tad too hot, he scrubbed at where Jean had touched him by accident. He'd fucked all of it up. Levi was going to want to know what was wrong, provided he hadn't been arrested for murdering Jean over the accident. Everyone saw was a freak he was. And his nerves... Fuck... Trying to stop himself from vomiting into the shallow sink, he threw up through his nose. Fucking carrot. "Eren? Its Armin, are you in there?" Knocking lightly on the bathroom door, Armin had to know full well he was in there. Having sunk to sit with his back to the door, his scent was more than likely leaking out under the gap "No?" "Open up" "Try again later" "I'll get Levi and Mikasa if you don't open up" The blond wanker would too. Pushing himself up the door, he opened it enough to let Armin in. His friend immediately gathering him into a firm hug "What happened? Did Jean say something?" "No... I panicked. At all the people. I panicked and needed a moment" "You needed more than moment. You're shaking" "It's cold" "Eren, what's going on with you? I know we've both been busy, but we're still best friends aren't we?" "Yeah... Armin, I don't know what to do anymore" Crying on Armin's shoulder hadn't been in his plans, Armin taking the full brunt of his weight as he did "Should I get Levi?" "No... let him enjoy this night" "Alright. Ok. I won't get Levi, but what's going on?" He needed this. Someone he could confine in. His stupid mouth seemed to need the attention even more "Viren's 6 months old..." "You're crying because he's growing up?" For a smart person, Armin was stupid "Armin... Viren is 6 months old" "You said that" "He's 6 months old and my heat never came" "Oh! Oh... didn't you... you know, have a heat in Europe?" Eren sniffled, embarrassed to be talking about his bodily functions "It was barely a real heat. It... I hate having heats, but Levi makes them bareable. Heats with him... they're amazing. He takes such good care of me. It wasn't like that" "Have you confirmed it?" "I tried... but the test didn't work properly" "Have you told Levi?" Sinking down towards the floor, Armin guided him down so they were kneeling "He didn't take the news well?" "He... forgot! I told him twice and he forgot!" Wailing in his friend's ear, Armin hushed him "I... I noticed he seems to, um, forget things. Did you know?" "Yes. He's been forgetting more and more. I don't think he knows, and he didn't forget getting married, but how could he... twice" "Married?! You got married!? When was this?" "A few weeks ago. Europe never gave me an answer... I suppose they thought Levi would go after the crown. I don't know... I just wanted to marry him before my heat came... and it never came. I don't know what to do. We were going to wait. We... were going to wait" "Should I ask a healer? We can get it confirmed? Or should I go get Levi? I don't know what to do. Does he know he's forgetting things?" "I don't think so... I'm scared Armin. What if he forgets we're married? What if he forgets who I am? Who Viren and Luca are? Obsydin was helping with the damage to his mind, and now he'd gone and Levi keeps forgetting things. I don't know what to do..." Gagging, Armin pulled him up and over to the sink, Eren throwing up as his friend rubbed at his back "I'm sorry. What do I do?" "St-stay? Just for a little while? I panicked... I... it was like when I was back in Marley. That night, when..." "When Zeke brought you home and you found out you were pregnant?" Nodding, Eren vomited miserably "I thought your nerves had been getting better now we were back. I didn't notice anything different. I should have noticed you weren't ok" "No. No... I've been better. With Viren teething, it went out of my mind. Then... I'm so stupid" "You aren't stupid" "I feel pretty stupid" "I should have known when your heat was. I'm your best friend... you're my brother" Rinsing his mouth, Eren then nuzzled into Armin's shoulder "You're the best brother I could have. God. I'm exhausted" "Do you want to go back to your quarters?" "No. I want to be there for Luca's cake" "And now we can announce you're married to" "We can't... Europe didn't say yes... people weren't supposed to know. I don't want them to know" "You could have told me" "I didn't want to make a big deal about it... you know what Mikasa would have been like" Armin groaned "She would have been worse than you. I can see it. But how did I not know? You told me it wasn't what I thought when it was exactly what I thought" "Nicollo and Moblit were our witnesses... and the minister hid the paperwork. We did intend to have a big wedding, but only once this whole prince thing was over" "Levi told me you want to move out near where the orphanage is. He got this dreamy look in his eyes and everything" At least his alpha remembered that... "Yeah... I can use my magic to help with the crops, and Levi can train the kids to ride horses... I'm tired of waiting, Armin. I love you guys, and it's not personal, but I want space. I want to start my life with Levi and..." "You don't need to explain to me. Mikasa on the other hand..." "She keeps acting like my mother. I love her but she's smothering me. How am I supposed to grow up?" "I think you're plenty grown up... you're married, you've got a mate and two kids... and now another on the way. I don't know what else classes you as a grown up" "Thanks, Armin... Fuck... we should go back to the party. Mikasa's going to be coming to find us" "Let her. I'll take her on" Snorting, Eren couldn't even picture that happen "As kind as that is, I don't want a fuss" "You don't think I could take her?" "Do you?" Armin laughed, giving him a tight squeeze before releasing him "No. Not in the slightest. Here, stay by me when we go back in" "Alright. You won't tell anyone, will you?" "No. Maybe... after you tell Levi" "Armin!" "I can't help it! You got married and you're pregnant! I'm getting a new niece or nephew! I'm allowed to be excited!" "Well try to keep it in. I don't want Levi to know anythings wrong. Not tonight" "Fiiiiine. But I expect to be the favourite uncle" "You're already the favourite uncle. Luca adores you" "Viren cried when I held him" "He's getting his teeth. My magic isn't any help. I don't want to give him too many herbs in case I accidentally drug him. He's not happy" "Stupid teeth" "Pretty much. With Luca, he was born with his teeth. So we didn't have these problems" "If he had his teeth from the beginning, how do baby dragons feed? His teeth are like needles" "They grow sharper as they get older. Dragons can also tolerate cows milk, unlike human babies" "See, I always wondered that but never remembered to ask" "Now you know" Returning to the party, Levi was by his side in moments. Passing Viren to Armin, Armin tried to protest as Levi pulled Eren from his side. Leading him a short distance away from everyone "What's wrong?" "Nothing" "Your eyes are red and I can feel your pain. Did something happen with that horseface? Did he hurt you?" "Wha- no. Jean simply bumped into me" "Than what's wrong?" "Nerves. Anxieties. We don't have a great track record with public events" "You're hiding something from me" He was hiding a lot of things from his husband... reaching up, Levi brushed his sweaty bangs back from his forehead "You also threw up. I can smell it on your breath" "I... panicked. There... it reminded me of a night in Marley and then... my stupid mind decided we were there for a moment. I'm ok. Armin came after me and we talked a little" "We sure did. You're both in the shit" Levi growled at Armin, but Armin brushed it off by passing Viren to Eren. Quick to take his boy, things felt better with Viren's solid weight in his hold "Armin knows we got married. He's not going to tell anyone about it" "Do I want to know how he worked that out?" "I told him. I ended up blurting everything out to him... are you mad?" "No. As long as he didn't bully you into telling him" "He didn't. But maybe we could talk later?" "Later or now? You look exhausted" "I'll be alright. Armin helped me through things, and we're going to do Luca's cake soon" "We are?! I mean, yes, we are. Now I need to borrow Eren to protect me" "He's my mate" "He's my best friend. Us royalty people need to stick together" "Armin..." "Sorry! Sorry, but it's just sooo cool. You. Me. Historia..." Armin was hopeless. Utterly hopeless. Eren feared for his friends intelligence "Let's finish doing the rounds before the cake" "Fine, I'm staying with you both" "You don't need to. Isabel and Farlan..." "Don't look as if they're about to burst into tears at the slightest incident" "I'm fine. You worry too much" Levi scowled at him, Eren feeling as if is stomach was in the bottom of his boots "We're talking about this when we get back to our quarters" There was no wiggling out of that one "Fine" Hovering by his side, Levi insisted on doing everything for him. Retrieving drinks, a plate of food, holding his hand and taking Viren when tripped ever so slightly over his own feet. It was barely a trip. Luca had done the rounds on his own, proud of himself for stealing food then hiding under the cake table to eat his hoard. It was sorely tempting to climb under there and join his boy, yet, as it was, Eren had to coax him out so that Luca's three teared cake could be cut by Nicollo. A tuff bribe with all the goodies Luca had amassed down there over the night. Finally resorting to pulling him out by the front two legs, his boy perked up when informed the cake was in his honour. Eren careful not to say "it was all for him" else no one would get a slice. Nicollo had outdone himself with each layer patterned around the edges with white dragons dusted on, Luca's name printed neatly on the middle layer with edible flowers beneath it. Trilling over all the attention, Luca stood on his back feet to supervise as the first piece was cut for him. His eyes widened as people sung and congratulated him. It was the kind of celebration his oh had deserved all along. Settling him down to sit on Armin's throne, Eren helped his son break the cake into bite sized pieces, proud as all hell that the little dragon was his son. Trilling his happiness as he ate, Eren stroked the top of his head, praising his boy for being so good. Whatever happened under the tablecloth stayed under the tablecloth until the maids had to clean in the morning, but other than that small blip, Luca had done so well. Carrying Viren and a plate with two slices of cake over to the pair of them, Levi smiled. Armin having temporarily abandoned him in favour for his own cake "How are my two boys?" "Luca's happy and I'm happy that he's happy" "Nicollo did well with the cake" "He did. Luca loves it" "I know I said I'd wait, but what happened? Did I do something?" Sitting himself down on the arm of the throne, Levi balanced the plate on his knee "It's complicated" "I feel like I've done something wrong and don't know what it is" "It wasn't on purpose. I'll get over it" "I don't like the idea of hurting you. From your pain, it must have been something much larger than what you're letting on" "I'll be fine. Now isn't the time to discuss it" "You'll talk to me, won't you?" "Of course I will..." He'd already tried to, so that had to count... right? "That's all I ask. That and I was wondering if you'd like to dance?" Eren gaped. He didn't mean to... but dancing wasn't Levi's forte "Don't give me that look. We never had our first dance after our marriage. Unless you count the horizontal tango in the sheets" Groaning at him, Eren shook his head "I'm surprised that's all. And if you dance like you fuck, it's going to be messy" Running his fingers through his hair, Eren was sure Levi knew what it was doing his groin "You're supposed to say "it's going to be good"" "There's that too. I'd like too" "Luca, will you watch your little brother so I can dance with your mother?" Luca was sniffing at the extra slices of cake, his neck craning as he tried to make his enthusiasm look more casual "You've already had a slice. These are ours" "I'll split a slice with him. It's a celebration for him. Let him enjoy himself" "Remember that when he vomits on your side of the bed" "Why does it have to be my side?" "Because you're the one giving him sugar" "But I'm his mother, aren't I my handsome man. Look at his little vest. He looks so grown up" "They're both growing up too fast" "You're still upset that Viren's first word was "ma"" Levi had been holding Viren for his first babbled word of "ma", "da" not following until a few days of Levi persisting with "da" "I'm holding out for his first real word" "I see. I wouldn't be surprised if its some variation of Luca. He adores him" "There's a lot to adore" Three small bites of cake was enough to churn his stomach. Luca happy to finish the slice, Armin taking up Levi's hovering duties as Levi finished his piece of cake. Mikasa hovering on his otherside, scolding him for not finishing his piece, which was made awkward when Armin started to tell her that "Eren was pregnant", then took a left turn to "Eren is sick". Taking Levi's hand before the alpha went into worry mode, Eren led his husband to the dance floor, concentrating on his mate rather than the crowd "Do you know how to waltz?" "Do you?" Erwin had forced him to listen and learn when he was simply Levi's lover. Or rather, made him watch from the sidelines during lessons. It really couldn't be that hard "Follow my lead" "Your lead? I'm the prince" Stepping back as Levi stepped forward, the alpha's eyes softened "You've got your smile back" "I didn't lose it" "You temporarily misplaced it" "That's what happens... and that was my foot" "I didn't step on your toes" "You did too" "I would know if I stepped on your toes" "Would you?" "What does that mean?" "Never mind" "No, what do you mean?" "Let's just enjoy this dance" "Eren" "Levi" "What do you mean?" "It means you've stepped on my toes twice now" "You're distracting me" "You're distracting" "You're beautiful. I can't keep my eyes off of you" Eren blushed, looking away "Don't look away from me" "Where am I supposed to look?" "At your husband" "You said I was beautiful. Doesn't that mean distracting" "A beautiful distraction, here, come up here" The song is wasn't a slow song, Levi not caring as he moved his hands to Eren's hips, Eren slinging his over his mate's shoulders "How's this?" "My toes thank you" "I didn't step on your toes" "You did too" "Is our first dance everything you wanted?" "Smooth transition there. And more than everything I wanted. I never thought you'd ask" "Mmm, dancing with my beautiful husband..." "I don't feel very beautiful" "You are. Even exhausted" "Oh, are you trying to say I don't look well" "I wasn't trying to say anything. I am worried, I feel like I've forgotten something important" "Because you have" The words slipped out before he could stop them. His omega was such a drama queen "I have? What? I must... say, I feel like... never mind. It can wait" "No. What is it?" "I'll tell you later. I believe you're the one with something on your mind" "I'm... worried" "That's nothing new" "Levi, Viren is six months now" "It's hard to believe" We're all the people he knew stupid? Or simply incapable of maths "Levi, Viren is 6 months. He's over 6 months technically" "I know. He's my boy" "God. You're dense. No. I can't decide if your sense or forgetful" "I've forgotten something haven't I? I... didn't want to admit it..." "Levi, my heat hasn't come" Levi's memory issues... his alpha had realised. The worry bleeding through his tone "Your heat?" "Is late" "How late?" "Two, nearly three, weeks late" "Oh... are you sure?" "Viren is over 6 months now. And... I think... I think I'm pregnant again" Levi stopped midsway "You what?" Burying his face against Levi's neck, Eren's tears rushed back "I think I'm pregnant. I'm sorry. I... I told you twice and you forgot. You... forgot" "Shit. Shit. Shhh, I'm sorry" "You forgot, Levi. I've been... I've been trying to keep an eye on your memory. I've been trying to... but even Armin knows" "You told me?" "This afternoon" "When you were crying. I'm so sorry. Shhh, this is on me" "I didn't mean to... I didn't..." "Hey, no. A pup is great news. A little sooner than we thought, but great news" "I didn't think that heat was real heat" "We were both out of our minds with the loss of our mate. I'm sorry I missed it. You're my mate. I should know these things" "We've been distracted with Viren" "That's no excuse. Is that, what upset you before?" "I was thinking of the night in Marley when I found out I was pregnant with Viren. Zeke, Yelena and I were at some socialite party. I ended up throwing up everywhere. Zeke went into panic mode, Yelena cut my corset and dress off... it was a spectacular mess. When I saw all the people..." "You panicked" "I nearly threw up on Armin" "I think that's allowed" "A pup... it's a lot" "We'll get through it. Have you had it confirmed?" "No. There's... symptoms. I tried to throw together a test, but the reading was weird" "You and something weird, that's the normal isn't it?" "Rude. God. This is a mess" "A mess we'll get through together. Only few more months and we'll be out of here" "Armin said you told him" "He can't keep his mouth closed, can he?" "No... I'm sorry I told him" "You tried to tell me first, it's not your fault" "I keep thinking that if..." "Whatever it is, no. You're not to blame. It takes two to make a baby" "I still feel responsible" "I know. It's because you care far too much" "You're my world. You, Luca, Viren and now this... little one... oh god... what if it's a clutch..." "Then we'll love them all" "Levi. The boys don't get enough of my time as it is. Viren is teething. This is just the start of it" "I had look in his mouth, he's got a second tooth coming through" "He does? I didn't notice" "Pixis dabbed it with some scotch. He said he did it with all his children, and nothing ever went wrong" "Great. The day has come where we are taking parenting advice from Pixis" "It seemed to help" "I don't want to use alcohol. I don't want to even use herbs in case something goes wrong..." "Eren, you have more knowledge on herbs than anyone else in the whole castle. You know your stuff" "I suck at healing magic. It's not my thing... but what's the point of having magic if I can't help him" "You're not some all knowing, all powerful god. You don't need to be. Parents get through teething all the time without the help of magic" "I hate seeing him cry" "I hate seeing you cry" Dipping him suddenly, Eren giggled, before clamping a hand on his mouth as Levi straightened him back up, Eren's hand moving to rest on Levi's shoulder as they continued to dance "Too much?" He'd silenced himself because he'd giggled, not because he needed to vomit "No. No. But can we go to bed?" "Bed?" "I'm drained, and want to curl up with my husband" "If you weren't pregnant, I'd throw you over my shoulder and whisk you away" "We have kids you idiot. We need to put the boys to bed" "Minor detail" "Major detail. There's going to be another one" "Armin could watch them" "Unless Armin has developed breasts and milk, that isn't going to work" "Minor details" "I'm going to smack you" "Spousal abuse" "I'm your husband. You agreed when we wed" "I don't remember that in our vows" "You're impossible" "You're impossible"

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