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ms-demeanor · 2 days

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You posted about adhd and I was hoping to follow up to clarify something. I’ve explained to my partner a million times about how the borderline-hoarding mess of his space is very mentally draining to me, and he understands but we’ve both essentially accepted he won’t clean his mess because he can’t because of his adhd. You’re saying he’s actually being a shit head?

This isn't necessarily an issue of him being a shithead, but it also isn't a sustainable situation. It's not good for you and there's a level of clutter that's probably not good for him either.

Large bastard is a lot more clutter-y than I am. The solution we've come to is trying to keep our messes at least isolated from one another; he can have his messes and I can have mine, but he can have those messes in his spaces, not all over the place. Sometimes those messes migrate, and that's when it's important for him to make the effort to rein them in rather than trying and failing to make a daily effort to keep our entire shared space tidy.

I think when you say "we've both essentially accepted he won't clean his mess" what I'm hearing is resignation; you're not happy about this but you don't know what to do so you've thrown up your hands and he feels helpless and unsure of what to do to improve the situation. This is the kind of "it's fine" that isn't really fine.

I think it would be worthwhile for you to each separately think about the mess and talk about it together. Are there areas that YOU *need* to have not-messy? Both for utility and your mental health? Are there areas where you can tolerate more mess than otherwise? Are there areas that are going to be harder for him to keep the mess out of than others? Are there things he doesn't *know* about cleaning up the mess?

I'm obviously a big "communication communication communication" person so I'm going to recommend a lot of talking about stuff, which is probably going to mean a lot of thinking about and interrogating stuff. I'm going to say "talk to him about why the mess bothers you" which means you also have to really articulate to yourself why the mess bothers you (for instance I'm not actually *bothered* by a messy kitchen, but I know it's going to reflect badly on us - and me specifically b/c of presumed gender roles - if someone pops by and the kitchen is a disaster, AND a messy kitchen is going to be harder to use). Genuinely, sometimes knowing *why* something is a problem might make it easier for someone with ADHD to do something. And it's not that he doesn't care that it upsets you, it's just that "Oh if I don't wash my breakfast dishes Anon won't have clear counterspace to make lunch" might be stickier in his brain (and less hard to look at emotionally) than "this thing I forget to do upsets my partner so I should do it."

For the record, I think that people with ADHD should read up on Demand Avoidance and see if it might explain some of the issues that they have in their day-to-day life; I've seen some really unfortunate situations with friends where trying to do things that their partner needed became the subject of demand avoidance. *I* have experienced negative outcomes of demand avoidance. The solution to that, however, isn't to stop making attempts to do the thing OR to simply try harder to do as they're asked/told (which reinforces the demand), it's to work on setting up a situation where the partners' needs are not interpreted as a demand. This is fuck-off difficult and requires a lot of patience and care and many attempts to succeed and will be different for each person and relationship.

(Also for the record demand avoidance isn't *super* strongly linked to ADHD and it's not a definitive symptom; like Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, it is something that occurs in some number of people with ADHD and can be a useful lens through which to examine various behaviors; you don't need to have DA or RSD to have ADHD, and having DA or RSD also doesn't invalidate your diagnosis; they're symptoms. For me, DA often feels like "if I don't look at it, it can't get me" - If I ignore all the messages I've got they aren't real and don't have real consequences so I'll just ignore my texts. If I don't look at the vendor email about the order, the problem with the order isn't real and it won't get added to my task list. If I don't look at the requests in my inbox I can't let people down when I don't do them. It's a self-protective coping mechanism but it's *maladaptive* and I can't just ignore the vendor email or all my texts. I need to work on a way of doing the stuff that I'm avoiding in a way that makes it less stressful and doesn't hurt the people relying on me. That takes a lot of effort, personal insight, trial and error, and )

But before I dive into specifics I want to be really really clear about one thing: sometimes people are simply incompatible. Sometimes one person has such a low tolerance for "mess" and the other person has such a high threshold for "mess" that it can't be reconciled. It sucks that this can end up being a thing that people break up over, but it is MUCH better to acknowledge incompatibility as early as possible instead of spending years and years building resentment.

There used to be a great forum called MiL's Anonymous that I spent a lot of time on. It had a lot of people in a lot of difficult situations struggling to get by and hold their relationships together. The question that was used as a litmus test to approach each situation was simple: If you knew today that everything about living with this person would be the same in five years, would you stay?

Because you can't control your partner. You can't control the future. You can only control yourself and your proximity to situations that are harmful to you. If you knew, 100%, that things wouldn't get better in five years, would you be okay with staying in this relationship? If the answer is "no," then that's that. Don't worry about questions of whether or not your boyfriend is a shithead, start the process of ending the relationship because there's a good chance the situation is going to be exactly the same in five years.

If the answer is "yes," and you'd stay in the relationship regardless of whether or not things changed, then it's time to take actions to improve your life within the context of the relationship.

(No judgement on that yes or no, btw. If you would hate living like this for another five years, and you would feel like you'd wasted your time and hadn't done the things you wanted to with your life, get out. Bail. Go. It will be better for you and better for your partner if you split instead of spending half a decade building resentments and and problems that you'll have to spend another half a decade healing from.)

Also, a note: you describe your boyfriend's mess as borderline hoarding - is the issue *mess* or is the issue *clutter*? I have friends who are very tidy, but whose homes are very cluttered. They like things, they have many things, they keep many things around, but their houses are always clean and well-dusted and orderly, just with a tremendous amount of *stuff.* I am addressing all of this as though the issue is mess, not clutter. If your boyfriend's situation is clutter (the space is busy and packed with things but it is functional and clean) and your issue isn't with *mess* (things out of place, things not having a place, things that need to be cleaned up gathering in stacks, falling behind on regular chores like laundry and dishes and taking out the trash) then you definitely need to assess whether or not you are compatible.

For instance here's a room that is messy but not cluttered compared to a room that is cluttered but not messy:

That first room is a *mess* but it would be very easy to clean up in under an hour. The second room is fairly tidy, but would take significant effort to pare down and declutter. BOTH of these can be difficult to live with but the second one is not dangerous or threatening to anyone's health. (The second one is QUITE cluttered and if every room in a house looks like this it can be overwhelming to live with; this is actually harder to deal with in a relationship than the first one in a lot of ways. I don't have a lot of advice for what to do if your partner is a high degree of tidy-but-cluttered because I don't actually think it's a problem or wrong to have thousands of books or bins full of lego or a million kitchen appliances as long as you have the space and can keep it safe and well-maintained; this is a really significant compatibility issue)

Okay, all that out of the way, here's the hard work.

Talk about this shit

Talk to your partner and define "mess." Make sure you are on the same page about what you mean when you're talking about what a messy room looks like versus what a tidy room looks like. Gather reference pictures. DRAW reference pictures.

Explain not just that the mess upsets you, but *why* and *how* it upsets you. In this context don't think of it as your boyfriend's mess, think of it as an unpleasant roommate. Discuss this using "I-statements". "When I have to pick up laundry all over the apartment, I feel like a parent more than a partner." "When there are piles of miniatures all over the table, I feel like I don't have anywhere to do things I'm interested in." "When there are dishes in the sink, I feel frustrated because I have to clean before I can feed myself."

Discuss, frankly and openly, whether he knows how to clean. I'm not trying to make excuses for him here but a lot of people with ADHD have a lot of stress and avoidance around cleaning because they spent a lot of time getting yelled at for not knowing how to clean properly.

Discuss your needs, be firm about what you require but willing to compromise. You *need* some spaces to be clean, and some spaces may be harder for him to keep clean than others. It may be MUCH harder for him to keep a bedroom tidy than it is to keep a kitchen tidy; if you need a clean and empty bedroom with everything put away and he simply cannot do that, that is a compatibility issue. But perhaps you need *your* side of the bedroom to be very orderly and can tolerate a moderate level of mess and clutter on his side. Maybe you're really really bothered by a messy kitchen, but it doesn't bug you if the dining table is covered with projects and papers. Figure out something more workable than "his mess goes everywhere and i live with it because he's incapable of cleaning" because he probably is not incapable of cleaning and you deserve to have places in your home that are comfortable for you.

Reduce friction for cleaning

Sometimes the problem isn't cleaning, the problem is the many many steps before cleaning, or not knowing where something should go when you are done cleaning. One of the absolute best things I've done for myself for cleaning my space is getting a broom holder and mounting the broom to the wall. Sweeping is now essentially thoughtless. I don't have to find the broom or pull it out from a pile of fans or go scrounging around for a dustpan it's right there on the wall, frictionless. So here are some ways to reduce the barriers to cleaning:

Make sure you and your partner both know how to use your cleaning supplies and know where those supplies are. When I switched dishwasher soap I had to re-show Large Bastard where I was storing it and how it was used, because to him what happened was the dishwasher tabs just vanished one day and he didn't know what I was putting in the machine or the process I used. He sometimes puts tools away in places that I can't see (he's more than a foot taller than me) so sometimes I can't get started on a maintenance project until he shows me where he put the battery pack for the drill.

Consider making a how-to chart to or having him make a how-to chart to keep someplace accessible so he can reference it while cleaning. Goblin.Tools Magic ToDo is great for this. Basically a lot of the time people with ADHD have trouble knowing what to do from step to step even if they've done something before, so having a step by step guide can make it easier (I have notebooks full of step-by-step guides for everything from paying for my tuition to removing licenses for my customers to weeding my yard)

Remove obstacles; don't keep cleaning chemicals in the garage in a box that's behind a stack of parts, keep them in the room you'll be cleaning. Don't keep the cleaning supplies that you use to clean the bathroom in the kitchen. Sometimes this means buying two bottles of bleach solution and two scrubbers and two sets of cleaning gloves but having fewer steps (fetch the windex, fetch the paper towels, fetch the gloves) is often the key to getting things done (open under-sink cabinet and grab windex, gloves, and paper towels that are there instead of in the kitchen).

This sort of overlaps with the next category, which is:

Create Dump Zones

One thing that I've found that seems very different between people with ADHD cleaning and neurotypical people cleaning is that neurotypical people are good at getting to a point where the cleaning is "done." They have checked off their tasks and they have finished and it is over. There are *SOME* chores that are like this (taking out the trash is a binary state, the trash has been taken out or it has not) and some chores are perpetual (horrid cursed dishes) but I think with people with ADHD, some chores that are binary for neurotypicals are actually perpetual chores. For instance "clean off the counter" is not a one and done for me. "Clean off the counter" may involve a three day reorganization project. "Clean off the counter" does not mean "wipe down the tile and put dishes away" it means assessing whether or not I need to make vegetable stock and bleaching three tea containers and reconsidering whether or not the sharps container should live somewhere else and going through the mail and figuring out what needs to be responded to and taking out the recycling and on and on and on.

We have had company at the house for the last two weeks, so I asked large bastard to clean off the dining room table, which is largely a project zone for him. Cleaning off the dining room table meant putting away his meds (and since he's a transplant patient that involves a 30 gallon rubbermade tote), throwing away some trash, and totally reorganizing his workshop. It also incidentally involved picking up a table from facebook marketplace and moving my plants, which has now involved moving my former plant rack outside (moving buckets, finding and organizing planters and gardening tools) and taking the former table to the thrift store (not done yet) and cleaning the rug that was under the former table. So "either the table is clean, or it isn't" isn't really true for us.

HOWEVER "hang on we can't eat until the table is clear so let's drive to Pico Rivera to get that console table right now" isn't a workable plan, so you create dumpzones as areas of holding between the start and the finish of the chore.

A dump zone can be a laundry basket. It can be a craft bin. It can be a back room or under your bed. It is a place to put things that you are going to deal with later because if you deal with them now it is going to derail the thing you are actually trying to do, which is set the table for dinner.

Dump zones are vital to cleaning with ADHD and I recommend them for day-to-day cleaning as well. The day-to-day dump zones might be more for you than for your boyfriend. For instance, Large Bastard works with bullets and he sheds bullets all over the house. I used to get stressed when I found bullets when I was cleaning because are these work bullets? Are these recreational bullets? Are they in testing? Do they need to be pulled? Do they go in the workshop or the office or the garage or does he need these today so they have to stay on the counter? And the answer now is "that's not my problem naughty bullets go in the jar." Which is perfectly sensible because he gets to say "mystery yarn goes in the bin" and "art supplies go in the bucket."

I feel helpless when cleaning a lot of the time. I'm frustrated and lost and I don't know where stuff goes and everything I pick up spins off into three projects in my head and every step feels like a wall to scale. Dump zones help me with that when there's pressure or a reason for cleaning beyond day to day home maintenance. People are coming over? The bedroom is a dump zone, I'll deal with that later. I'm just cleaning up because I need to? Okay I can find a permanent home for this new dish soap.

AS A VERY IMPORTANT COROLLARY TO THIS:

Active projects do not go in dump zones while you or your partner are cleaning. This may mean designating a project sanctuary area like a corner of the table or one particular chair in your main room where a project can be placed so as not to be disturbed. (if my current crochet project ends up in the yarn bin, that may mean that I don't pick the project up for another three months, it lives on the windowsill behind the couch because that's where it'll get worked on)

Do not put things away for your partner, put them in the dump zone for your partner. Your partner has to be the one to put their own stuff away in a way that works for them. I tend to find that this naturally puts a limit on the time stuff sits in the dump zone, because eventually you'll go "hey where's my thing?" and will put stuff away. If that doesn't happen, it's still generally better to have stuff in a dump zone than all over the home.

Do not decide you know what things go together from your partner's stuff and try to "put like things together." The neurotypical urge to put like things together is the mindkiller(j/k). You do not know which things are "similar" in your partner's organization schema and attempting to organize things on your own is going to end up with all of the things "organized" being functionally lost forever from your partner's perspective. Large Bastard's mom would do this and it was infuriating, she'd say "oh I put all the electronics stuff in one box" and she would mean soldering irons, transistors, ham radios, HDMI cables, and cellphone chargers. We are *still* going through boxes of stuff that she "tidied up" when he was hospitalized in 2020 and 2021.

To prevent the need for quite so many dump zones over time, you can work on setting up landing zones and "homes" for projects and tools.

Landing Zones

Landing zones are places where things go when you come inside from doing various things. Sometimes your landing zone only needs to be a tray for your wallet and keys, sometimes your landing zone needs to be a place to take off muddy boots and put a trowel and gloves down before you shower.

To make an effective landing zone, consider what behaviors you're trying to minimize and whether the people using it are ACTUALLY going to use it. For instance I was tired of the corner of my hearth getting cluttered with random junk so I hung up some hooks and put a shelf and a basket there and it became a really effective landing zone for my bag and keys and the mail, but it was VERY ineffective for Large Bastard because it's by a door that isn't the primary door he uses to enter the house. As a result I always know where my keys and bag are but he has trouble finding his keys and wallet. He tends to enter the house through our bedroom and has an overloaded valet next to the door and that's usually where his wallet ends up. Mounting a shelf to the wall above the valet and putting a basket and a hook on it will be a better place for his stuff to land. It's not that he's not using the first zone because he doesn't know that it's there, or because he doesn't care about lost time when I'm searching for my car keys after he borrows them, he's not using it because it's not by the door he uses. That's all.

I have a landing space for when I come in for gardening that's different than the one when I come in from grocery shopping. I have a landing space for when I walk into the dining room instead of the kitchen when I get home.

Landing spaces prevent stuff from piling up all over the place because they are a limited functional space that should be used frequently. Mail ONLY goes in the landing zone. If you have mystery mail or if you're not sure it's safe to toss, you put it in the landing zone. You can't let the mail get piled up too high or you won't have a space for your keys. You can't let the change in your wallet tray get too deep or your wallet is going to slide off, etc., but you also don't just put change on the coffee table or your nightstand because the landing zone is right there.

Homes for items are just what they sound like. They're the place the item goes. It lives there. My meds live on my nightstand. You would not believe how poorly I did with taking my meds on my vacation because they weren't on my nightstand. A while back large bastard lost one of his sets of sorted meds and we tore the house up looking for them because he couldn't find them in his nightstand, which is where they live. *I* found them in his nightstand because I emptied out the entire top drawer (he had only looked on the top layer) and found them underneath a radio and a hammock. Even though they were *hidden* they were in their home, so they were findable. I recently needed ink for an art class. Art supplies live in a dresser by my desk. Ink lives in the art bin or the top left drawer. The ink was not in either of these places (it was on a cabinet in the dining room behind a teacup) so it took me weeks to find it.

Sometimes the reason that ADHD spaces are so messy is because objects have been assigned homes in places that are visible and if they get moved they get lost. This is a genuinely difficult problem that requires a lot of effort to solve and can involve a lot of trial and error for creating a tidy living space. For some people, open shelving and visible storage might be a good solution. For some people, assigning a VERY clear home and inculcating that location by habit is the only way to clean up a space. For some people one very cluttered corner to at least isolate the chaos does the trick (for me and large bastard open shelving doesn't work because anything in one place for too long becomes invisible; that means that I rely on assigning things homes and large bastard relies on having contained chaos and a general idea of where to search but what that DOES NOT mean is that he is clean or tidy. His spaces look like an explosion. But he can mostly find his stuff and do what he needs to do and as long as that's limited to specific places in shared spaces I can live with it; the dining room table can be a disaster, the kitchen cannot).

People organize things differently. It often takes a while for neurotypical adults to settle into an organizational style that works for them and ADHD adults may need to settle into a new system every few months for it to continue working. The cleanup and declutter is most likely going to be a permanent project that is always going to demand some level of attention from everyone in a shared space, but "my ADHD means I can't do it" is not really going to fly. Maybe his ADHD means that he can't keep his space tidy, but it doesn't mean you can't move stuff from shared spaces into dump zones or that he can't do stuff around the house.

If he's insisting that his ADHD means that he can't clean it is possible that he's not being a shithead, he just feels helpless and doesn't know where to start and has adopted the belief that he's a useless piece of shit who can't even keep a tidy space like a grownup because he's internalized a lot of shitty attitudes (hello, my internal monologue about keeping a clean house). But it's also possible that he's just being a shithead.

It's something that's worthwhile to investigate with him. If he's unwilling to make an attempt, then he's being a shithead.

It is also not your responsibility to rehabilitate another person. If he wants to clean and it's something he feels bad about and needs some help and support with the way that someone might need help or support for learning to use a mobility aid, that is fine but you don't have to be the one who gives him that support if it's detrimental to your health, and you don't have to be the one to teach him that stuff if it's not something you're capable of. And if he is NOT interested in working on making your shared living space more accessible for you, that is not your suitcase to unpack and you just have to ask yourself the question from the start: would I stay with this person if I knew the situation was never going to change?

IDK, I'm sure a lot of this reads like "anon you must take on the emotional labor of training your partner to be an adult" but it's really meant to be more of a way of assessing yourself and your relationship. If you created landing zones do you think he'd use them? Would he get angry if you assigned a laundry basket as a dump zone for his stuff while you tidy the living room? Is living with him long-term going to be comfortable for you if nothing changes? Do you have enough of a shared definition of "mess" that you're at least in the ballpark for what counts as a clean house?

anyway good luck, and a reminder to folks that I'm compiling a bunch of adhd resources and other information on my personal website, ms-demeanor.com. It's coming along slowly but it will eventually include stuff like ADHD cleaning tips and how to tackle a hoard, so maybe keep your eye on that space.

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wenevergotusedtoegypt · 1 year

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I made a post about my anniversary on Facebook.

It was really nothing special or particularly detailed. Literally just a picture from our wedding and a 2-sentence caption saying how great my husband is in very general and pretty cliche terms (great husband, father, and human being, I’m so lucky).

A woman I never knew very well, who I have not seen in 5.5 years or spoken to in as long, and who has literally never reached out to me just to talk or anything, took the time to send me a MULTI-PARAGRAPH MESSAGE about how I should be more thoughtful towards other people and only tell my husband how great he is privately to his face. Why? Because she has had ups and downs in her own 5-year 4-child marriage, and this morning she had a fight with her husband, so when she saw my status it was extremely hurtful and she can’t stop sobbing and can’t focus or go about her day. She suggested I should only use Facebook for “kiruv and Torah” from now on.

Woman that is. That is so clearly a YOU problem I can’t even. If you can’t comprehend that a cheery post on one’s anniversary does not mean the person has never had a disagreement with their spouse, if you think no one is ever allowed to mark a special occasion where other people can see it because maybe you and your spouse argued today, that is a YOU problem and you should probably get off social media for your own health. It’s not like I’m constantly posting every single time my husband does something nice for me about the specific thing he did and reminding the Internet every other day about how awesome he is. I literally post about him like ONCE A YEAR. This year I’m gonna get really wild and make it twice to congratulate him on his white coat ceremony. If “I’ve been married X years and I like my husband” in public once a year is enough to send you into a day-long spiral, you should absolutely address that, but from YOUR side, not the person who you can just unfollow or even block on social media if their infrequent content is that triggering for you (especially considering you’ve never bothered to keep in touch otherwise, it’s not like you’d be missing anything!). Don’t blame me for your inability to understand that social media is just part of the picture of someone’s life or for your shalom bayis problems.

Why the f am I dealing with this at 4am (cuz I’m up nursing and when this girl messaged me for the first time in 5.5 years I was expecting something actually nice and not an essay on how I ruined her day by making a generic happy post, so I opened it)

#and yes she did for some reason feel the need to specify how many kids she has #which is SO ironic in context #like what if I wished I had more than 2 kids by now did you consider that #I don’t but it’s besides the point #you can’t be upset at someone for sharing good things about their life #and then share totally superfluous good things about your own #I could ALMOST see this if I wrote something like #‘he buys me flowers every single day and we have never had a fight ever and he makes 10 billion dollars and also does all the housework’#but even then just unfollow holy crap!#also my Facebook has never been for just ‘kiruv and Torah’ so idk why it took her this long to get upset about it #oh right because this isn’t actually about me it’s about her #also also do you really think the things I’d tell my husband about our relationship are that generic!#obviously we also had a personal conversation about our anniversary and it was a lot more detailed #I did not tell the world what was meant for his ears

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dumplingsjinson · 6 months

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List of random dialogue prompts (pt. 3)

“Truth be told? I miss the times — the me — before I fell in love with you.”

“You know, I can see myself in, on top of, or under you. What do you say?” “I can see you buried six feet under my very feet if you don’t stop joking about this shit with me.”

“Was there a point when you fell out of love with me?” “There was a point when I fell in love with you, but never out.”

“When did you fall out of love with me?” “That’s the thing: I never fell out of love with you. You’re the one who fell out of love with me.”

“Right person, wrong time… What if this is the right time? We’re just the wrong people for each other.”

“You have me wrapped around your fingers. Crazy part is, I don’t mind it.”

“Don’t forget this: I made you. I can easily break you if I wanted to.”

“I shared pieces of me, with so many people, and none of them kept those pieces safe, and I don’t know if I can risk that with you because it would devastate me if you turn out to be the same as them all. I would be completely destroyed.”

“Don’t give me that look.”

“You okay?” “No. I need hugs. From you. I need you to hug me.”

“I just wanna fucking get over you so I can be okay again.”

“Stop trying to remind me that you’re still in my life. I’m trying to not think about you, for God’s sake.”

“I wanna kiss you so badly right now but we’re in public and I know you hate public display of affection—“ “I’ll allow you to do it this time.” “Wait… Really?”

“I make shitty decisions and you’re a testament to that matter.”

“I have things to do, and most of them include me trying not to think about you.”

“I’ve never cried because of someone, you know? I didn’t have anyone to cry over. You’re the first, and you’ll also be the last, or so God help me through this embarrassment.”

“Breaking up with me does not mean you had to kick me off your Spotify playlist, you know? Because damn. As much as I’m upset, your list had some bangers.”

“You don’t get to do decide my feelings for you.”

“I’m not bitchless, you fucking dickhead. Take that back!”

“Every little thing reminds me of you, which sucks because you’re not in my life anymore.”

“It’s kinda weird not seeing your name on my phone when I wake up. It’s gonna take me some time to get used to this.”

“I think I knew this wasn’t going to last when I realised it’s not that I trust you. It’s that I don’t care what you do, and who you might be fucking around with.”

“One text from you has me happier than a child whose mother bought them their favourite candy. It’s not okay.”

“I don’t share my Spotify playlist with just anyone. It’s like a secret love language of mine, reserved for those I want to let in. You’re one of them, yet you’re here thinking I don’t feel the same way about you?”

“I dunno, I just… Kinda fell for you.”

“You’re the reason why I fell in love with you. You, as a whole.”

“There are some songs that I can’t listen to anymore, because they remind me of you; of all the times we’ve had together. And it sucks because some of them are great songs. And you fucking ruined them, you asshole.”

“I’m tired of acting like I don’t care, because I do. I fucking do, and that’s what makes this even worse.”

“One thing you should know about me is that I suck at letting go.”

“So you’re telling me I’m supposed to sit here and give a fuck? You couldn’t pay me enough to do that. I have places to be and things to do.”

“You need to stop being such a dramatic bitch.” “It’s the only way I can entertain myself, okay? Now piss off and leave me be.”

“Maybe I shouldn’t have let you go.”

“You deserve someone better than me—” “You don’t get to decide that for me.”

“You ever think about how good we could have been together?” “Yeah. I think about it all the time, and then I remember how badly you fumbled. So yeah, good job.”

“You’re blushing.” “I’m not.” “…Then I guess I’ll have to give you something to blush over.”

“I lost myself while trying to find the good in you.”

“I think it’s comforting that they’re somewhere out there… Even if we never speak again, you know? They were a part of my life, even if it was only for a little while. They made me feel good, even if it was only for a short amount of time.”

“Remember when you said you’d catch me when I fell? Well, you’re a fucking liar. Figuratively and literally. Now I’m hospitalised and also emotionally scarred. I hope you’re fucking happy about that.”

“If we break up, I’d look for you in other people and be reminded that they are not you, and that I’d never find someone like you again. And… I don’t think I can bear the thought of that.”

“I give you permission to break my heart.” “And I give you permission to end me if I ever do break your heart.”

“I have things to do—“ “And I’m one of them.”

“You’re only saying sorry because you want to make yourself feel better, so you can go shove that sweet apology up your ass because it doesn’t mean shit. I hope you continue to feel like shit over what you did, because I’m never forgiving you.”

“I had expectations for someone I knew couldn’t meet those expectations, so that’s my fault for expecting anything from you at all.”

“You? Breaking my heart? It’s funny how you think you even have that power over me.”

“You were like a routine that I loved and it felt… comfortable. But I guess that’s not the case anymore.”

“You fell in love with the idea of someone that wasn’t even real. You fell in love with your own projections. How are you so foolish to think that it would have worked out?”

“I’m fine. Of course I’m fine.” “Everything about this interaction is telling me you’re not fine — not even close.”

“The idea of us was perfect. Blame me for thinking it would turn out into something good and as fantastical as what I made it out to be in my head.”

“Because no matter what I do, I can’t stop thinking about you and it’s about to drive me to the very brink of insanity, so if you’ll excuse me for not wanting to be near you, that would great.”

“I would not be who I am today if not for you.”

(pt 1.) | (pt. 2)

#long post #dialogue prompts #otp prompts #angst prompts #smut prompts #prompts #romantic prompts #fluff prompts #writing prompts #suggestive prompts

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undercoverpena · 6 months

Text

anytime

javier peña x f!reader

summary: “Thank you for coming with me,” you whisper. Nodding, he feels you follow his path—dropping, scorching his face, tracing the place where the hair sits atop his lip. “Anytime, cariño.” “Anytime, really?”

wordcount: 3.1k. warnings: fluff. bestfriends to lovers. banter. reader wears a dress and has a gloss on lips. no physical description. javi calls reader solecito as a nickname only. likely warnings for spelling as i wrote this on my phone. an: huge thanks to @wildemaven for creating this moodboard (pls go show it some love), letting me make a banner from it, and then letting me write this for Javi instead of Frankie. bby, i hope you like this.

Javi had never been good at avoiding challenging situations.

For the longest time, he’s been finding himself in the centre of a whirlwind—whether in Bogotá, Cali or apparently even back home.

You, his friend, best friend—a well-kept secret, tucked away in his chest, not shared with a soul when he was away. You were a thing that he’d clutched close to his chest from the moment the two of you had first gotten close, through his failed engagement and even more so when he left for Colombia. You, in all your understanding, hugging him, telling him he’d be great, amazing, the very best.

Both of you were younger then, less worn down by life, its many obstacles and all the other things.

You best not become best friends with anyone over there, Peña. As if anyone could annoy me as much as you, solecito.

In the brief interim of his return, you hadn’t appeared all that different. You may have had a job, a house—drove a slightly better car than when the two of you were staying out at all hours—but you, at your core remained very much the fucking same.

Still just as understanding, as kind. A person who got him, without really needing to try.

For Javi, the best thing—outside of you being you and the monthly calls you made him promise to keep when he was drowning in murder, drugs and Escobar—is that you never ask him about it. Any of it.

You had always let him pretend, escape, listen to you fill him in on gossip—things such as disagreements over the size of rhubarb and whether someone was having an affair. A thing you did even when he came back. Even more grateful for it then, when he grew tired of the questions, the compliments, the everything.

Its why he didn’t tell you when he would land back in Laredo for good. Just waiting, standing outside your place, leaning against your car as you walk down the street—eyes brushing over him, pausing, before he gets to see that smile. That signature fucking smile.

When he’d left the first time, he remembers how you’d lingered near your car, unwilling to climb into your bright yellow death trap—the entire reason he called you solecito to begin with—wearing the beginnings of that smile even then.

The difference is now he knows that there was something under it. Hidden, held back, kept from him.

It’s why it meant so much to him when he saw it in all its glory, all alight, blooming and somehow healing.

He can’t explain it, but it repairs strands inside of him. Your presence alone continuing to do so when he meets you for lunches, coffees, and late-night drinks. In exchange, he makes you laugh, your head thrown back as he tells you about whatever he did on the ranch—all of it comical, apparently. Because the idea of him, Javier Peña doing ranch work brought tears to your eyes.

“You’re just jealous.”

“Jealous?” you splutter, taking a mouthful of your beer as you narrow your eyes.

Nodding, he leans back into the booth, arm stretched out, picking and picking—the label crumbling from the sweating bottle. “Yeah. Bet you’re upset you don’t get to see me herd cattle and mend fences.”

“Oh, yeah. One-hundred-percent.”

Shrugging, he grins—an easy task with you. A thing that has always been that way, even when he turned up at your door when he couldn’t get married; even when the two of you sat under the stars when he told you about possibly going to Colombia. You still made him grin—even when things weren’t fucking easy at all.

“I’ll add it to my to-do list—visit Peña on the ranch—it’s currently sat under finding a dress, a boyfriend and the will to fucking live.”

Snorting, he traces his bottom lip with his thumb.

Your face scrutinises him, before rolling your eyes. And he just waits—because you always spill eventually.

One. Two. Th—

Fine, you huff, before it unravels from you. How the wedding of your work colleague is close, closer than I thought and you’re tired of attending these things alone, circled like a fucking fish by single sharks.

And he’s listening, taking it in. Trying to not wince at how high-pitched you’ve got as you’ve ranted.

Mainly, Javi finds there’s more questions rising than answers provided.

One singular one rising to the top. A thing he’s wanted to ask for the last few weeks. Not in a rude way, or in the way it burns inside his chest when he talks to you on the phone and he has to bury it. But, it’s there, bubbling, wishing to escape and know. It's even louder when the two of you are like this, crammed in a space, laughing, smiling, sharing, wondering—

Why are you even single? How are you?

You’ve mentioned people—names, here and there when the two of you had been on the phone. Them fluttering out before you can pull them back, but then they’re forgotten. Javi, I get one call a month—let me tell you about the cattle war going off. And, in a way, he didn’t want to hear, didn’t want to know, so he never asked.

Now, it’s all he wants to ask.

Because you’re… you. You’re brilliant, beautiful—funny, clever, witty. And yet—

“—so, now it’s a week out, and I need to find a dress, a date and drive there to watch another person I know get married.”

He knows he should busy his mouth with the bottle—wrap his odd idea in beer. But, that part of him—the one which wants to help, solve issues, and be useful—rises up in him like a phoenix left from the ashes of Colombia.

“I’ll go with you.”

He expects the pause, even braces for the look of shock.

He doesn’t expect the smirk. Doesn’t expect the way it spreads out, to hit your eyes. How under the low-bar light over the table, it makes your eyes glimmer and fucking shimmer.

“You want to go to a wedding with me?”

Shrugging, he picks off the last part of the label—the mess of it all circling around where the glass meets the wood.

Mirroring him, you shrug. “Alright.”

“Alright.”

He should take his eyes off you, but he finds he can’t.

Javi hasn’t been able to since you stepped out of your place, a handful of your dress as you locked up—stepping down your steps to his car, letting it flutter down to your ankles.

You look like a fucking dream.

A thought he knows he shouldn’t have—but has all the same. His heart staggered, half-halting in its hammering as his hands paused in their drumming on the steering wheel; his glasses slid down his nose, his skin suddenly warm all over, even if his jacket was already splayed out across the backseat.

Close your mouth, Peña.

I’m chewing gum, solecito.

Yeah, that’s why your mouth is open.

It hadn’t passed his notice that you were good-looking before today. He’s known you were, had always known it—he had eyes, after all. But, he’d always felt there was a line. A line the two of you never delved too close to step over. The sign above both of your heads already illuminated in bright bulbs and flashing lights:

JUST FRIENDS.

Until this, anyway. This thing that can only be described as the longest one-hour drive he’s ever been on. And he used to do recon with Murphy.

Because you’re teasing, taunting him. All in that usual way that you do. And it’s so easy to flirt back, to let line after line roll, but he has begun to spot you squirming.

Doing so while matching his suit in a deep brown shade—chosen by him, ‘pick a colour suit, Javi’. Adding a tinge to some of your comments—things that if said by someone that wasn’t you, he’d ask them (flirtingly) if they were coming on to him.

But with you, it’s something he can never be sure. Never something that can be completely understood, known, cracked or figured out. In the same way, he can’t understand how your perfume keeps following him. How it embeds itself into the cabin of his truck when he picks you up, sews itself into his clothing when the two of you meet—and right now, is attempting to bury itself in his skin, muscles, and bones.

“You’ve been abnormally quiet.”

Smirking, he snorts. Fingers smoothing out his hair as he swings into a spot—the tyres crunching over the gravel. “Have I? Or have you just not shut up.”

“Rude.”

Laughing, he cuts the engine—hands resting on the top of his thighs, not missing the way your eyes follow his movements before clearing your throat. It shifts something in him, makes a little part of him surge, like the smallest of fireworks suddenly erupting in his chest.

Something he forces himself to shut down the moment you shove open your door, slipping out, as he grabs his jacket.

“Do I need to be worried about you crying today, solecito?”

Rearranging your dress, and slipping the strap of your bag over your shoulder, you squint as you stand tall, hand covering your brow as you meet his gaze.

And fuck, with this backdrop, even squinting, you look beautiful, radiant, stunning all over again. Somehow his brain having forgotten when you were next to him, when you were acting as if this was the most normal fucking thing they’ve ever done.

It isn’t.

Something he’s becoming more aware of as his throat goes dry, and his thoughts slow to nothing—

“No, you’re good. Your mouth is open again.”

You say it with a smirk, all teasing—making heat lick up his spine all over again. And, if you were anyone else, he’d have already pulled you close, tilted your chin up, and likely smothered your mouth with his.

But, you’re his friend—his best friend. The one solid thing he’s had in his life since he became a name, a poster, a hero.

“C’mon,” you say, turning on your heel as you head in the direction of the entrance, him following, jacket slipping on as he mutters mouth isn’t fucking open under his breath.

Even if he knows it was. Even if he’s desperately trying to stop his eyes from descending down to your hips, eyes fixated on the way you walk with ease to the wooden sign which greets all the guests.

He knows, due to his absence from home, there haven’t been many weddings he’s attended. Least of all like this. But even he thinks this is over the top, suddenly understanding why you hadn’t wanted to come alone. Because grand doesn’t quite cover it—not after the last one he’d attended.

This one has flickering candles lit in the day, waiters all set to hand glasses of bubbles and offer little mouthfuls of flavour on silver trays. Then, there’s the backdrop—the enormity of the building, only for you to tell him that it’s an outside wedding.

It’s more of a comfort as to why his hand drops to the small of your back than anything else. A need to be rooted, to feel calmer as he nods at passing people he doesn’t know (and hopes don’t know him), feeling you curl into him subconsciously, your bag swinging between the two of you both—affording a gap, forcing it, in fact.

The ceremony will start soon.

He overhears it, as he assumes you do, because your fingers wrap around his wrist—taking it from your back, before your palm meets his, and then you’re guiding, leading. Dragging him. All willingly to the back of the building where he sees it—the makeshift aisle. A wooden arch, and lots of deep orange-brown chairs all line up on either side of an orange aisle.

“Glad we chose brown now,” he murmurs.

“Does it make you think, y’know—being at a wedding?”

He swallows. Because it’s a loaded question.

One he assumes has been sitting all politely on the tip of your tongue since you sat beside him in his vehicle. It’s why his eyes watch you carefully as you grab the two of them a flute each from a passing waiter. Handing it to him, adding nothing—not rescuing him. Just waiting instead, doing that thing you do, where your eyes widen as you wait, trying to look all innocent even though it’s you who has just dropped a live grenade into the centre of the conversation.

Shaking his head, he snorts. “No. Not really. Knew… I knew deep down it wasn’t right. Her… and me.”

“You got any idea what’s right?”

You take a sip this time when the question lands, it again sparkling in glittered innocence, the softest of smiles pressed against the glass.

You he thinks. But he swallows that away and says ‘Not a fucking clue’ instead.

Throughout the day, he’s been desperate for a reason to stop looking at you.

So far, he’s found none.

Bits and pieces of things Murphy used to say, the words he’d drop into conversation when talking about his wife: how he knew, why she was the one, all coming back to him in drips and drops.

It dawns on him, the same as it had done since before he went to Cali, that you might mean a little more than a friend. A lot of what Murphy used to say, so easily applied to how Javi felt about you.

You make him feel calmer, create a space where he can relax, really unwind. It’s easy, uncomplicated, when he’s with you—from the conversation to the things he thinks. Complex balled thoughts stretch out until they’re in easy-to-decipher lines, able to process, able to understand.

He even told you about the boats.

A secret he’d have been prepared to take to the grave, if not for the fact you pointed out he wasn’t sleeping. Your eyes watching, pleading, don’t lie to me. And fuck, he couldn’t—not even if he wanted to.

That should have been the first sign.

He guesses he should be thankful today has been stuffed with more of them. One after the other. From the way you made sure to make him a plate of only his favourite things, to the way you knew when he needed a bit of space from the thousand questions as to how you both knew one another, and what he does.

Now, Javi is on the sidelines, admiring you in a way that makes his heart double in size.

Your dress skims around your calves as you dance—your arms rising above your head, glee stitched itself from cheek to cheek. On occasion, time halts when your eyes land on his—stealing whatever thought he had, only resuming normality when you close your eyes, belting out the lyrics to the song.

Mainly, the thought he finds which keeps returning is: I wanna do this with you again. any place. any time.

A hollowness scratches out in his chest as he lets himself acknowledge it. A thickness growing in his throat, a sorrowness weighs down on his shoulders as he nurses his glass—hand in his trouser pocket, telling himself he should be content he got to be on your arm, got to have you against him during a slow dance over an hour ago. That he gets to see you smile, hear your laugh—even know you.

“Hey, Peña.”

“Hey solecito.”

You grin—a little breathless, the music having changed, becoming slower, softer—wrenching the glass from his hand as you drain it.

“Fuck me. Y’thirsty?”

“Very. You’d know if you had any rhythm.”

He pinches you, lightly—teasingly. Your grin shifts into a laugh, tucking yourself in against him, arm around his back. And fuck, the way you’re looking up at him, he wants to warn you.

If you look at me like that, I’m going to kiss you.

Javi wonders what you’d do if you did. Whether you’d pull away, hissing the two of you are friends. Or whether you’d kiss him back.

“Want to get some fresh air?” you ask, your words against his ear—lips so close to ghosting his skin.

“Sure.”

It’s cooler when the two of you step out from under the marquee, the music getting quieter when your fingers loop in his, guiding, easing him around plant pots and tall trees, until the two of you are descending marble stairs and past iron fencing, to take him to the perimeter, to the view looking out over the city.

He watches as you step forward, fingers around the iron fencing, leaning, staring out as you let out a heavy sigh. One laced with things he wants to ask for, tug it from you, let you unload whatever is weighing on you—because that’s what you both do for one another.

You make it easy.

Make it all bearable.

But, whether you mean to, or not, you shiver. A light one, barely noticeable by most—but he isn’t most. His fingers are already at the button, undoing it, sliding his jacket down his arms before he places it over your shoulders, watching your head turn, meeting his gaze.

“You look really pretty.”

Flicking your eyes down, you smile. Sweetly. Unreadably. “Well, you’ve always been pretty.”

“Pretty?”

Laughing, your fingers tug his jacket closer, burying yourself in it. “The prettiest, Javier.”

Leaning beside you, he feels the metal from the railings, you’re both resting on, cut into his palms. He wonders if you feel the same, your dress billowing in the gentle breeze as the two of you stare off into the distance, spotting the flickering lights of a city, of homes tucking in for the night.

Then he turns his head, finding you already watching him, studying him in a similar way as you were before.

And, he lets his eyes drop to your mouth. A sign. A signal. It’s not the first time, usually, he does so when you’re not looking, letting himself trace the curve of your lips. Now, he stares at the way your gloss has long since gone, left behind on glasses and straws.

“Thank you for coming with me,” you whisper.

Nodding, he feels you follow his path—dropping, scorching his face, tracing where the hair sits atop his lip.

“Anytime, cariño.”

“Anytime, really?”

Nodding, he swallows. A thousand things he’s thought, and felt, all rushing to the surface—unwilling to bury itself, to descend under the usual guilt and feelings of inadequacies when it comes to you.

“I’d do anything for you.”

Smirking, you tilt your head. “Anything?”

Biting your lip, he feels it—something thrumming in him, being plucked.

“Will you kiss me?”

“I could…”

Your brows rise, a louder cheer coming from inside, but it doesn’t do anything to tear your eyes away from the other.

The whole world could slowly vanish from around the two of you, and all he’d want is just to stare at you.

“But?” you ask, delicately.

Almost so softly, it makes his chest ache.

Dipping his head, he lets his gaze wash over the place again—the rolling land, the trees, the houses in the distance.

“If I kiss you, I don’t think I’ll ever stop.”

You slide closer, shoulder to shoulder, eyes scorching his jaw, his neck, the side profile he can feel you tracing with your gaze.

“Then don’t,” you say.

His neck almost cracks with the quickness of his movement, his eyes scanning, reading, a part of him wanting to step back, and protect you. Because he’s not sure about the parts of him you’d find easy to love—

“You don’t know what you’re—“

“Don’t care,” you interrupt, fingers twitching on the lapel of his jacket. “I know you—Javi, not Agent Peña. I know the boy who cloud-watched with me when my parents wouldn’t stop fighting; I know the man who told me to stop sending him postcards from the town shop—but also whispered that he liked them.”

Snorting, he smiles.

“So, if you want to, no pressure—but, I think you should kiss me.”

“Yeah?”

Nodding, you bite your cheek. “Think you’ve wasted a lot of time not kissing me already, honestly.”

Of course you do, he thinks. And then he kisses you, palms on your cheeks, slanting his mouth over yours.

And fuck, it’s the best fucking thing he’s ever done.

an: honestly, this made me so fucking happy to write.

#javier peña x reader #javier pena x reader #javi peña x reader #javi peña x you #javier peña x you #narcos x reader #javier pena x you #javi pena x reader #narcos javier x reader #narcos javier #pedro pascal x reader #narcos fanfiction #pedrostories #mm: late night texts #javier peña fanfiction #pedro pascal characters fanfiction #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fanfic

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suashii · 3 months

Text

— 𝓂𝒾𝓃𝑒, 𝒶𝓁𝓁 𝓂𝒾𝓃𝑒 ౨ৎ

okkotsu yuta x f!reader. 2.9k wc. ﾉ nsfw (mdni) ﾉ characters aged 21+ ﾉ step-brother!yuta ﾉ stepcest ﾉ college au ﾉ jealousy ﾉ possessiveness ﾉ yuta is insecure ﾉ marking (hickies & biting)

this is a continuation of my other stepbro!yuta fic, misplaced lust. that offers some background to this fic but this can also be read as a standalone!

a month has passed since you and yuta shared that fateful night in your living room, since you’ve started seeing him as someone other than your step brother—though, you still haven’t quite settled on what to call him. yuta would insist on “boyfriend” but the word feels heavy and sticky in your mouth, like you can’t really get it out any time you try. you suppose you’re still getting acquainted with the idea of yuta as a lover rather than a brother.

all you can say for sure is that things are different.

your standing as simply siblings is the image you keep up in public, much due to your persistence, though, behind closed doors, it’s a different story. gone are the days when yuta kept his urges buried. he touches you when he pleases—stealing the sweetness of your lips in morning kisses, holding you hostage in midday cuddles, exploring each and every curve of your body as you writhe and pant beneath him at night.

it’s taken some getting used to but you’ve fallen into some sort of strange routine with him. the life you’re living is far from ordinary, though, you’re pleased with it.

tuesdays—you have class on campus and, as much as you’ve told him that it isn’t necessary, yuta practically begged you to let him take on the task of taking you to and from your classes. you’re sure he’s parked in the lot across from your building now, but you’ll have to keep him waiting a while longer so that you can exchange contact information with your new project partner.

“just sent you a text,” the boy tucks his phone away in his pocket, “did you get it?”

as if he willed it himself, your phone dings with a message notification. it’s from an unknown number but you infer that the sweet “hi! :)” is from him. you wave your screen at him with a smile and a nod before quickly saving him to your contacts.

“i’ll text you when i get home, yeah?” you look to your partner, eyebrows raised in question.

“sounds good to me.”

“great.” you offer him a wave before setting off to the crowd of cars in search of yuta’s.

it doesn’t take you long to find it, or him for that matter. he’s standing outside the vehicle at the hood, arms crossed and eyebrows pulled together in confusion. the sight leaves you puzzled yourself as you approach him. he usually meets you with a smile. it’s strange to not see the corners of his lips pulling up.

“hey, what’s wrong?” you question. if you were in the privacy of either of your apartments, you’d reach out to smooth out the crease between his brows.

yuta reaches for you, large hands coming to rest on your hips before he pulls you closer. you frown and shake your head in a silent reminder that people are watching—people who shouldn’t see you in such a position. much to yuta’s dismay, you knock his arms away and take a step back. your action seems to upset him further. “who was that guy?”

you fight the urge to roll your eyes at his question. if you thought his investment in your relationships before you hooked up was concerning, then the tabs he keeps on you now border overbearing. you can’t talk to a guy within his line of sight without being questioned about it afterward.

“he’s just a classmate,” you reassure him with a sigh.

your disinterest in the conversation does nothing to ease yuta’s nerves. a piece of him knows that his jealousy may be unwarranted, but, to be fair, you’ve never gone as far as sharing contact information with another guy—and right in front of him, at that. “a classmate that needs your phone number?”

“yes,” you swear you see his frown deepen with your answer, “but only because we’re working on a project together.”

yuta trusts you, he does, but knowing that you’ll be working closely with a guy he’s unfamiliar with leaves a sour taste in his mouth. he’s well aware of how the minds of men work and who’s to say this one won’t make a move on you?

though, as he looks into the depths of your eyes, yuta reminds himself that it’s you. you wouldn’t let things escalate that far, you wouldn’t betray his trust—right?

large hands come up to cradle your face, thumbs brushing over each of your cheekbones. midnight eyes bore into yours as he asks, “you promise?”

your heart jumps in your chest—at the feel of his rough palms on your face or the unexpected question, you’re not sure. the intensity behind his lidded gaze almost makes you forget where you are, that he’s not supposed to be touching you like this here, where anyone can see. you take hold of his wrists, pulling his hands down from your face, opting to hold them between your bodies to keep them hidden.

“i promise,” you tell him, voice low so that only the two of you can hear.

the warmth of your hands and the softness of your voice relieve all the tension that’s built up in yuta since he was met with that unsavory sight. he squeezes your hand, lips pulling up into a soft smile.

he knew he could trust you.

life with yuta is as normal as it can be outside of your interactions with your poor classmate. the boy really hasn’t done anything wrong but he still unknowingly bears the brunt of yuta’s irritation and resentment. a simple text from him informing you that he added content to the document and would appreciate you looking it over earns a grimace from yuta if you take too long replying to him.

so, you suppose you shouldn’t be surprised when your phone vibrates with a notification—no, two notifications from yuta during your library meeting with your acquaintance. you hope it’s not rude to shift your attention to your phone for a moment. two messages one after the next implies urgency.

> where are you?

> you said you’d be back by 6

so much for urgent. you click the button on the side of the device to put your screen to sleep, not bothering to reply. you’re sure you’ll be wrapping things up here soon and the process will go even quicker if you don’t break to text him back. you make a mental reminder to respond to him as soon as you’re done, flipping the phone so the screen is facing down on the table.

you’re barely able to get another paragraph typed out before your phone is buzzing again, not with a notification but with a phone call. despite not being able to see the caller display, you have an idea of who it is.

“i’m sorry,” you apologize to the man across from you, grabbing your phone off the table. “you don’t mind if i take this, do you? i’ll make it quick.”

he waves his hands in a show of nonchalance. “no, no, go ahead.”

you offer him an apologetic smile before stepping out of the room you two reserved to dedicate some time to your project. when you hear the click of the door announce that it’s closed, you press the accept button on the call.

“hello?”

“where are you?” there’s mild panic laced in his voice as he continues. “you didn’t reply to my texts.”

you should have seen this coming. he isn’t always like this—so obsessive over your whereabouts, but you think you have an inkling of what’s got him so on edge and he’s sitting in the room you just left. “yuta, i’m still at the library. we’re almost done.”

hearing your voice is like an anchor for yuta, keeping him grounded from his unwelcome, wandering thoughts. he tried not to worry when the clock hit six and you weren’t walking through the door, briefly thinking that you got caught in traffic or some other minor inconvenience that kept you a few minutes.

though, as more time passed, the hypotheticals turned to something less innocent—ones that centered around you and him and the sorts of things you could get up to in a room with just the two of you. it made yuta’s head and heart hurt in a way he’s never experienced before but the pain is beginning to subside now that he’s heard from you.

he’s tempted to ask about what’s keeping you but for his own sanity, he buries the question, choosing instead to tell you, “i was just checking in.”

“everything’s fine.” you nod despite him not being able to see.

you hate when he gets like this, stressing himself out over nothing, letting nonexistent things eat away at his mind. but, in the same breath, you love being the one to bring him back to earth, the one he finds solace in. maybe that’s why your voice softens with your next words. “i’ll be home soon.”

there’s a shaky sigh of relief on the other line, one you’re almost sure wasn’t meant to be audible.

“good.”

the final straw comes a couple of weeks later when yuta’s outside your door, fishing around his pocket for the key you’d given him when you moved in. though, before he’s able to find it, the door swings open.

he expects to be met with the sight of you in your loungewear—shorts that ride up your thighs and a shirt that leaves a sliver of skin on your tummy exposed—but the person standing before him is the last person he wants to see, especially in your foyer.

it’s your project partner.

yuta’s eyebrow twitches as he looks at the man, silently wondering just what the hell he’s doing inside your apartment. he’s got a comfortable grin on his face that slowly falls as he turns away from you to find yuta standing in the hall. there’s confusion written over his features and if yuta wasn��t so annoyed, he’d laugh—he’s the one who should be confused.

“hey, man,” your classmate greets yuta cautiously before turning to you. “you know this guy?”

the question seems to be enough for you to finally recognize yuta’s presence. you don’t smile and hug him like you usually do when he shows up at your place. no, instead, your eyes widen like he’s the unwelcome one.

yuta’s skin warms with his boiling blood as his dark gaze flits over to meet that of your guest. “i’m her b-“

“brother!” you cut him off. with the look in his eyes, you couldn’t be sure he wasn’t going to say another word that started with the same letter. “he’s my step brother.”

“oh,” the man nods, “nice to meet you.”

yuta musters up as friendly of a smile as he can. if you didn’t know him as well as you do, it would have simply looked like he was caught off guard meeting a new face. and while that’s partially true, you can tell that the smile is forced—that his teeth are really clenched behind his lips and that the sentiment is not shared.

your classmate turns back to you, not taking notice—or, at least, choosing not to acknowledge—the thick awkwardness in the air. “well, i’m heading out. see you in class.”

you give him a wave as he slips out the door past yuta, whose sole attention is now on you.

it doesn’t take a genius to tell what’s on his mind.

“yuta…” your voice usually has a calming effect on the man but it doesn’t seem to work this time around as he slips into your apartment, fingers running through the messy strands of inky hair.

“what was he doing here?” there’s an edge to his tone as the question fills the air—one that’s a mixture of anxiety and possessiveness, something different than what you’ve heard over the past few weeks.

you close the door before facing yuta. the darkness in his eyes from earlier lingers but the anger has dissipated, replaced by uncertainty. the latter is just as chilling.

something tells you that your explanation, no matter how truthful, won’t get through to him—not when he’s so worked up. still, you try to make it clear that nothing was going on between the two of you. you reach out to take his hand in yours so that he stops tugging at his hair. “we were going over our presentation, that’s all.”

the stare he meets you with is heavy, almost intimidating. “you had to bring him home to do that?”

“i didn’t feel like driving to campus so i had him meet me here.” you can see yuta’s jaw clench at your justification. you drop his hand in favor of placing yours on his face. his skin is warm beneath your hands and your fingers graze over the curves of his cheekbones and jaw. he softens under your touch, though the insecurity sticks to his expression. you hope your next words are reassuring. “but nothing happened—i swear.”

there’s an honest glint sparkling in your eyes and a softness to your gaze that convinces yuta that you wouldn’t lie to him—not about this, not about anything. with a deep breath, yuta’s hands come to rest on either side of your waist and he nods—more to himself than anything.

he dips his head down, capturing your lips in a heated kiss. it’s eager and greedy, like if he doesn’t do it now, he won’t ever be able to. his tongue runs over your lips, swirls in a dance with yours as he breathes in your air and scent. it’s dizzying and your head is spinning even when he pulls away.

his nips at your lip, nose pressed against yours. “you’re mine, right?”

you nod, parted lips glistening with yuta’s spit.

“then show me.”

the journey to your room is clumsy, kisses interrupted by clothes being strewn about the hallway. though, when you do finally make it to your bedroom, your back meeting the mattress, yuta wastes no time letting his lips roam all over your body. he sucks and nips at your delicate skin, leaving dark marks of his love on your neck, your collarbone, your chest.

the simple sensation draws a melody of moans from you that reaches yuta’s ears, swelling his heart and his cock. he groans—the erection between his legs is almost painful and he finds relief in grinding the head up and down your folds, letting it bump against your clit. the contact elicits a sharp gasp from you and the sound only feeds yuta’s arousal.

he can’t hold himself back any longer.

sinking into you feels like the closest yuta will ever get to paradise. he fights his eyes from rolling back, stops himself from drooling, as he bottoms out in a practiced motion. he usually gives you a moment to adjust around him but he’s far too worked up to allow you the courtesy this time around, almost immediately setting a tempo with his thrusts.

the sound of skin slapping skin as his hips snap into you accompanied by the squelching of your wetness fills the still, thick air of your bedroom. yuta’s choked groans join them and he lets his head fall to rest at the crook of your neck.

his tongue pokes out to lick at your skin, lips latching on to leave yet another purpling spot behind—a sign of his love, a sign that you're his.

the thought causes yuta to bite down on the side of your neck, not hard enough to break the skin but enough to leave an indent of his teeth. he raises his head to meet your eye, labored breaths tickling your face as he hovers above you. he swallows before pressing his forehead to yours, hips still bucking into you.

“you’re mine,” he breathes out, nails digging into the sheets on either side of you.

you can’t tell whether it’s a question or a statement but you nod the best you can regardless of which it is.

his dark eyes bore into yours, a mixture of passion and possessiveness swimming in his gaze. “say it.”

it takes a moment for you to find your voice and even when you do, your declaration cracks. “i’m yours, yuta.”

“that’s right,” he dips his head down to kiss you, smiling against your lips before pulling away, “all mine.”

yuta’s hand finds its way between your bodies and to your clit, rubbing circles against the sensitive bud and drawing heavenly whimpers from you. he starts to lose the rhythmic pace he set as his climax creeps upon him, each thrust growing more and more erratic. a fire sparks to life in your abdomen with the added sensation and you can feel the heat seeping beneath your skin, penetrating your nerves. every part of you is on fire.

the stimulation is soon too much for you, pushing you over the edge and into the deep end of pleasure. the sharp breath you suck in is followed by shaky moans as you ride out your orgasm. with all the pretty noises you’re making and the way your cunt flutters around him, yuta follows not far behind you.

he pulls out before his seed can spill inside you, the warm white ropes of cum spurting on your belly instead. his own moans mingle with yours as he comes down from his high, chest rising and falling with each of his heavy breaths.

his eyes flit up to yours, hand reaching out to caress the side of your face. you lean into his touch instinctively which makes his lips curl up in a smile. you wouldn’t do this for anyone else, would you?

you really are his.

thanks you for reading! if you enjoyed, please reblog or leave a comment! ᡣ𐭩

#₊˚ପ⊹ signed: jujutsu kaisen #yuta x reader #yuuta x reader #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x you #jujutsu kaisen x you #yuta smut #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #jjk drabbles #jujutsu kaisen drabbles #cw stepcest #𐙚 after hours

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stvolanis · 3 months

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ok ive seen you do farleigh start being the sweetest bf ever, but now do farleigh being a BULLY

oh my gosh i feel like REALISTICALLY, if Farleigh was in a relationship w/ someone he’d be such a tease/asshole!!! But like in an annoying boyfriend kind of way💕

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who you’ve been in a relationship with for a little over a year.

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who goes out of his way to completely torment you. Putting things on higher shelves, just to laugh at you when you get onto the counter to reach it, but end up falling off. Of course, he’ll ask if you’re okay like a good boyfriend, but he’d still continue laughing while helping you back up.

“Stupid girl.” He’d Mutter with an eye roll. Yet, he secretly liked when you came to him when you were in distress.

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who moves your clothes out of the bathroom, including your towel while you’re showering just to be able to see you naked with water dripping down your pretty body. You complain to him about how your freezing, but all he does is stare at you.

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who isn’t abusive, at all, and is an amazing boyfriend—but does get a little rough when you pass by and he lays a heavy hand on your ass, making you wince. Or when you say something bratty and he’ll reach over and grab your throat, just to make sure you know who’s the one in control a little too tight.

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who loves to pick on you over your sensitivity. “Such a crybaby.” He’d mock as you sniffled against him, rubbing your watery eyes as you watch the most reasonable movie to cry to, “the notebook”.

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who sometimes doesn’t take your emotions about certain things seriously. For example, when he failed to remember the exact kind of dog you told him you wanted when you had randomly asked him if he remembered. He’d click his tongue in annoyance. “Okay, how am I supposed to remember that?” He’d defend, but get annoyed when you make a big deal out of it. (You’re kinda extra)

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who adores his little girlfriend, always so needy for him and his approval. You make him feel wanted and appreciated; his little sunshine. But, he would never say any of that outloud till he was on his deathbed. He liked that you chased for him, as toxic as it was.

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who will 100% bully you, but makes sure you know he loves you. But dear god, forbid someone says something to you he doesn’t like—have mercy on their soul (and I’m not even religious). He has a mouth on him he uses to talk shit, so best believe he has some hands on him too that he isn’t afraid to use. Only he can’t torment you.

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who fucks you like he hates you. Slapping, spitting, choking, biting, etc. He’ll whispers the most vile things to you while he pounds into your sopping cunt. “Such a fuckin’ slut, aren’t you? Always beggin’ f’my cock like a bitch in heat.” He’d coo at you mockingly, his breath fanning your neck.

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who uses you as a stress reliever when he’s mad. Say Oliver pissed him off by fooling Felix into doing some random shit, he’d come into your shared room absolutely fuming. “Knees. Now.” Is all he’d have to mutter before you’re on your knees between his delicious thighs, hair in a ponytail. He loved your obedience.

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who lowkey hates that you have a life outside of him cause like—what do you mean youre going out with Venetia? So he makes sure to remind you that he’s the only one who’ll treat you as good as he does before you leave by fucking you silly, cum dripping down your thighs.

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who’s your biggest bully, but also your biggest supporter. Yes, he’ll make fun of you for a lot of stuff, but he’ll always make sure you know he loves you by little gestures like giving you things that remind him of you, getting your favorite food when you’re upset, etc. and it warms your little heart.

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who goes a little too far one day with his taunting and mocking, to the point where you’re locked in the bathroom wiping your tears with your sleeves. “Baby, yknow im just messin’ around. Come out, Princess.” He’d say as he rattled the door handle. Never an apology leaving his mouth.

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who bribes you to come out by promising to take you on a little shopping spree to your favorite make-up store, and obviously you come out cause like, who would pass up an offer like that? Not you, that’s for sure.

Mean! Farleigh Start! Who fucks you softer that night. Instead of slurs in your ear, you’re met with a few praises and tender kisses against your sweaty skin. He holds you after and doesn’t apologize, but you know that he’s sorry. And thats enough for you.

Mean Farleigh Start! Whos considerably nicer to you than other people. With you, at least, he tries to have a filter. He doesn’t with other people. He’s an absolute menace to society, no one is safe when it comes to his harassment, except for you. He’s not always an asshole to you, he can be sweet sometimes.

don’t be shy, ask to be a part of the tag list and request things!!

TAG LIST: @elvisalltheway101 @epthedream69 @claire-elvisgirl @elvisrealgf @littlehoneyposts @ireallydontcareanymorebrooo @luxuriouslokistan-3 @foxevxid @salepso @parkbabyj

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nevernonline · 4 months

Text

✧.* must love dogs; csc one shot.

✧.* synopsis: after a breakup (three years ago) your friend finally attempts to get you back on the saddle by creating you a dating profile despite your protesting, hooking you up on dates with some of the eligible bachelors of their choice, none of which impressed you. until one day you met the boy with the dog.

part of my seventeen movie series.

paring: seungcheol x reader (y/n uses she/her pronouns.)

genre/s: fluff, strangers2lovers

warning/s: alcohol mentions, swearing, cigarette mentions, swearing, some pg-13 jokes.

word count: 3.7k

note: im notorious atp for not editing, pls. I hope you enjoy my lil must love dogs inspired fic, its one of my fav movies!! xo.

“So how was bachelor number five?”

With a roll of your eyes, you gazed at your friend Seungkwan resting his feet on top of your shared glass coffee table, ticking the tip of the city guide book and magazines rested on top.

“Boring. He was nice or whatever, good looking, but he wouldn’t shut up about league of legends and his job. Other than that he asked me no questions about myself or what I do. A failure as most would call it.”

“So I take it you wouldn’t want to go out with him again?”

“God, whatever gave you that impression? I thought you could tell we were headed for marriage?”

“Hey. I’m doing you a very nice thing, you don’t have to be so sarcastic about it.”

“Look, I know. But just because Jun is getting married and I still haven’t moved on doesn’t mean I need to be dating all of the sudden.”

The boy patted the seat next to him. Scooching over from his spot, making room for you on the couch.

“ It’s been nearly three years since you ended it with him. At least fuck someone before you dry up.”

“That’s fucking gross and what vibrators are for.”

A small scream left your friend's mouth as he covered his ears trying to remove what he had just heard coming out of your mouth.

“Y/n his wedding is in two months, we need to find someone to bring that’s not me. You don’t want to feel the embarrassment of his pity party and everyone feeling sorry for you.”

“Why can’t you just be my date?”

“Too obvious. Plus your whole family will be there, just do it or you know your parents will be in your case again. This ‘ secret man’ you’ve been seeing doesn’t exist and I think your Mom is starting to catch on.”

He was right. Your parents come from a high status, as do your ex boyfriends, they were the reason you both had met and became friends in the first place. But, when your relationship ended you lied to them, it was working well until you got a call from your very upset mother telling you Jun showed up to your house with his family and a girl on his arm that wasn’t you.

“Okay, then why can’t I choose my own date?”

“The men you chose to quote on quote date are literally disturbing, I’m sorry but it’s the truth. Like that one dude you brought here last time? Whatever the fuck his name was literally was wearing a necklace vial of his own blood and claimed drinking your own urine and reusing water is the only way we can save the planet.”

“Okay, but he was nice.”

“He literally didn’t flush the toilet because he only went number one. That’s fucked, no.”

“Can I at least, like at the very least have some approval over the men you match me with then?”

“Maybe.”

“ Kwanie, please. Come on, don’t make me use the what goes around card, it’s my turn”

“No, it's absolutely my turn.”

“Not true, you wasted it two months ago when I had to bail you out of that strange house party orgy thing by saying your dog died and coming in crying to a bunch of naked strangers. You owe me.”

“Valid.”

“How did you not realize what that party was anyway?”

“This is not currently about my life failures, but yours my beautiful friend.”

Laughing at Seungkwan's major mishap, you forgot to greet your dog, Lucky. She was waiting and crying at your feet, finally waking up from her sweet slumber to greet you.

“Hello my baby, do we have to go outside?”

“She went for a walk this afternoon, but after her dinner she crashed so she probably wants a walk. I can go if you want to change or shower.”

“No it’s alright, I can take her, you're already in your pj’s and after my date I need a distress, want anything from the mart?”

“Ice cream?”

With a small nod you jumped up, taking the small curly creature in your arms and grabbing her harness before heading back outside into the warm spring air.

Ten minutes into your evening stroll, you decided to sit on the green wooden bench overlooking the water, the same bench your grandmother always spoke about when you asked her the same story about how she and your grandfather got engaged. The gold plaque with their names rubbing off sitting behind your back.

Suddenly you heard a man yelling from behind you, running through the green grass lit up with fluorescent lights.

“Hey, Kkuma, no come back.”

A small white dog came up behind Lucky sniffing her and starting to play, you noticed her cute hairclip and ran your hands through her fur.

“God, I’m sorry. She normally doesn’t run off like that.”

“It’s okay my dog lov-“

As you turned around to look into the round eyes of the owner, you were stunned with how beautiful he was.

His dark hair pushed under a cap, a white t-shirt too big for his frame sitting beautifully in his toned shoulders, and his red sweatpants matching his shoes.

The unfamiliar man was bending down now petting your precious pet and his own at the same time talking to them in sweet baby voices.

“This is Kkuma by the way, and you are?”

“Y/N”

“Hi y/n, you’re so cute, you and kkuma can be best friends if your mom lets you.”

You let out a roaring laugh realizing he thought you had introduced your pet and not yourself.

“Oh sorry, did I say something wrong?”

“No, no. It’s just I’m y/n this is Lucky sorry my fault.”

“Oh god, cool. Sorry Lucky, I’m Seungcheol. You can call me Cheol and this is Kkuma.”

“Nice to meet you Cheol and Kkuma.”

“You too. Look I know I just met you and all, but I’m new to the area. I was wondering if you’d want to get coffee and let the girls hangout sometime?”

“Oh. Yeah, of course. Let me give you my number.”

Seungcheol handed you his cell phone with a new contact page pulled up giving you full reign to type your name and number into his list.

Handing the device back to him your fingers touched, creating an electric shock, to not like you to believe in signs, but for some reason it felt like the universe trying to tell you something.

“Thank you, I’ve actually got to get going, but if you're free tomorrow would you want to grab coffee and hangout at the dog park?”

“Yeah, totally. Just text me a time, we can just meet here. What kind of coffee do you drink? There’s a good spot by my apartment. I can just pick it up for us.”

“Wow, that’s so nice of you. Just a black americano is cool or a cold brew whichever.”

“No fun I see.”

“How would you know that? Just because I don’t like sugary drinks doesn’t mean I can’t have fun.”

“I don’t know, we will see.”

“We will. I’ll catch you tomorrow girls.”

“Nice to meet you.”

“You too!”

Seungcheol left the same way he came running through the grass with Kkuma on his heels, following him all the way back to their home.

Strolling back down the pathway back to your apartment, you could help but feel butterflies in your stomach, you knew nothing about the man you just met other than his name and his cute dog, but there was a lot of unknown.

Smiling like a Cheshire Cat, you unlocked the front door and watched Lucky sprint back into Seungkwan lounging on the couch, eating for the ice cream you had forgotten.

“Where’s the snacks? Also why are you smiling like an idiot you’re freaking me out.”

“We met a guy with his dog, a very cute guy might I add, who actually asked for my number and wants to get coffee tomorrow.”

“ What the fuck, it’s late tell me he doesn’t live in the park?”

“No he said he just moved to the area, he was clearly not a park dweller he had keys, and smelt amazing actually.”

“Smelling strangers? A new low even for you”

“Oh my god, fuck off.”

Seungkwan pulled his phone out and opened various social media apps preparing himself for best friend stalking duties.

“What’s his name?”

“Seungcheol, not sure about his last name, but he goes by Cheol and his dog was Kkuma.”

“Great.. okay, found him I assume?”

“What the fuck, how? Let me see.”

“Eager aren’t we?”

“Fuck off?”

Grabbing Seungkwan's phone from his grip, you scroll quickly through the new faces' social media.

“Yeah, it’s him.”

“Okay, let me see. Wait, he's actually hot AND seems to have his own business?”

“Oh my god.”

“Here, look”

After the next few hours, you and your friend stumble on into your separate rooms preparing yourself for slumber, which never seems to reach you and before you know it dawn is creeping its way through your curtains, and your backup preparing yourself for a day with you and Lucky's new friends.

Something about your energy was excitable and nearing frantic, you could wait to step outside into the fresh air with your pocket sized princess at your side, but it was still early.

You had decided on pampering yourself for this morning, finding the need to make yourself up, you spread on your skin care with glee, drew perfect lines of eyeliner and strained your hair, pulling it up into a nice tight ponytail the hair tie matching the taupe tone of your sweat suit perfectly. Before you knew it it was 9:45 a perfect time for you and Lucky to step outside the door.

Placing her in her tote bag, you stepped inside of your favorite coffee shop, the light pink walls covered in photos and paintings, the smell of the espresso seemed sweeter.

“Morning, y/n you look beautiful today. Would you like the usual?”

“Thank you, for me, yes. But can I also get a large americano, just black and he didn’t tell me iced or hot, so iced is good I think? Or maybe hot with a cup of ice on the side? If that’s okay?”

“He? Did you finally start dating someone?”

“Oh no, just a friend of mine. Seungkwan told you shit about me didn’t he?”

“Yes. Sorry.”

“No worries, can I actually get two of the plain croissants and two of the flower dog cookies too?”

“No problem, it’ll be right out.”

“Thank you.”

Taking a seat next to the pick up counter you scrolled through the instagram of the boy you’re meant to be meeting, telling yourself it’s just to remember his face, but really it was to get a peek into what else he’s into or if he was single.

“Y/N”

“Oh shit, sorry. Thank you guys, see you tomorrow.”

Picking up the paper coffee carrier and pastry bag, you waved goodbye to the baristas and briskly walked back to the bench you were at yesterday, your bench, spotting the back of Seungcheol’s head watching the water with his dog.

“Hey. Sorry I’m late.”

“Oh, no problem. I just got here.”

Placing your items down on the bench, you freed her bag and greeted Kkuma alongside her before taking your seat.

“Here’s your coffee, I wasn’t sure if you wanted hot or iced so I got you a cup of ice too just in case, a croissant, and a little treat for your girl too.”

“Wow thank you so much, hot is fine actually. How are you?”

“Good, nervous. I mean it’s not every day you meet a stranger for coffee.”

Seungcheol laughed, tipping his head back slightly before taking a bite of his pastry.

“Sorry. I know it’s weird, you just seemed like someone I wanted to get to know, and Kkuma liked you so I figured you’re good people.”

“Well, thank you. You too. Lucky generally does not like men other than my friend Seungkwan, my dad, and my ex-boyfriend so consider yourself special.”

“I do.”

“So what brought you to this neighborhood? Work, a relationship?”

“No relationship, but actually my business partner is from here. We decided to open our warehouse and stuff here because it’s much better than doing it in the city. We have a spirit company and we’re planning on opening a brewery and bar, so that’s why I’ve been working late nights. I guess it served me well, I made a friend on my first day.”

“You’ve only been here for a full day? What the hell? You already know the best spot in town. What kind of stuff do you guys make?”

“Beer and soju mainly, we’ve been working on it for five years now and are finally at a spot to open up and start selling it to people, which is cool. But what about you? What do you do?”

“I’m a medical student actually, my parents are both doctors, I used to really want to be one too, but I don’t know, I don’t really have the same passion for it as I used to.”

“Well what would you do if you had the choice?”

“I always wanted to design stuff for dogs, start a rescue, anything like that. I got so happy seeing Kkuma as an accessory girl.”

“Yeah, she’s very stylish. I think you should go for it, you know? Why waste time becoming something for someone else and risk being unhappy just for their sake?”

“Honestly I wouldn’t even know how to start a business on my own, let alone tell my parents.”

“Hey, I didn’t either and look where it’s gotten me.”

You turned back to the water, staring into the calm blue waters, trying not to go into your own head.

“You’re oddly inspiring, I’ll give you that much.”

“Thank you, y/n. You’re oddly sassy, I’ll give you that.”

“Shut up, I’m not.”

“You already tried to clock me by saying I’m no fun because I drink black coffee and you said oddly inspiring like a back handed compliment. You definitely are, but I like it.

“Good.”

You had continued your twice weekly hangouts with Kkuma and her dad for two weeks now, getting excited whenever the days roll around to see the two of them again, but you haven’t hung out once without them around, which made you wonder if your friendship or crush rather on this boy was only due to your dogs being friends themselves.

Seungkwan tried setting you up on more and more dates with more and more duds, he was starting to lose hope himself, knowing that the one person he could set you up with was Seungcheol but he didn’t want to overstep.

Strolling home from another failed connection, you decide to stop and have a beer before going home to give the dirty details to Seungkwan about who you had just met.

Pulling open the tab of one of your drinks from your six pack, you took a deep breath and sat down, feeling your eyes welling up with tears.

Another can opened as you went to take the first sip. A hand comes on your shoulders, whispering a boo in your ears.

“What the fuck!”

Jumping up from your seat the hand on your shoulder belonged to Seungcheol, the look in his eyes went from happy to concerned as he saw the small streaks of tears on your cheeks, you top now dribbled with spots of beer.

“I’m so sorry, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m good. Want a beer?”

“Sure, thanks. I’m sorry I scared you, I thought you heard me behind you.”

“It’s alright, I was in my own world anyway. You look nice, where are you headed?”

“Soft opening for my bar actually, I texted you, but I figured you didn’t respond because you were busy.”

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I would’ve loved to come. I was a bit preoccupied on an awful fucking date.”

“That bad, huh?”

“Worse.”

“Well the good news is you technically didn’t miss it, it doesn’t start for another twenty minutes and you’re dressed very nice. It worked out.

“Fuck I wish I paid more attention, I could’ve got you some flowers or something.”

“Next time. Will your roommate be alright taking care of Lucky?”

“Yeah of course, he knew I would be out tonight. I’ll text him just to be sure.”

“Cheers to hanging out without our kids?”

“Definitely.”

With that suddenly your awful night and doubts about your relationship with the raven haired boy went out the window.

“Shall we?”

“We shall.”

Seungcheol lent his arm out for you to wrap your own around, and you both stayed out that way for a few moments, before discarding your cans and walking the way to his new venture.

“Here it is, you ready?”

“When you told me you were opening this up I thought you hadn’t even started? But it looks like it’s fully ready.”

“Ah, well we had planned to wait a bit, but we’re getting too antsy, so here we are.”

“It’s beautiful, holy shit.”

“Thanks, sit here, I’ll be right back.”

You took a seat on the green leather booth, looking around and taking in the ambiance of the custom lighting and ribbon like wallpaper, when a blonde gentleman walked over sitting down across from you.

“Y/n? Right?”

“Yeah, nice to meet you…”

“Jeonghan, I’m Cheol’s business partner.”

“Jeonghan, right. Nice to finally meet you, I’ve heard a lot.”

“Likewise, you’re so much prettier than Cheol let on actually.”

“Oh?”

Without a chance to interrogate the new face further Seungcheol walked back over to your table, setting down a few bottles of various spirits for you to try, including a couple of cocktails.

“He didn’t scare you too much did he?”

“Not at all, he was just telling me actually how much prettier I am than you alluded to.”

“Jeonghan, don’t do that to her, come on. You know very well I told you she was pretty, I even showed you her instagram, you agreed.”

“I know, I just wanted to make you tell her yourself and my job is done, see you around y/n.”

“Nice to meet you.”

As Jeonghan left the table you felt your cheeks growing with heat, unsure if it was the alcohol or the fact that Seungcheols friend made him confess he thought you were good looking.

“Sorry about him, he’s a menace.”

“No need to be sorry, I have my own menace at home and I don’t mean my dog.”

Seungcheol laughed, pouring you a shot of his very own soju to taste, filling with anticipation hoping you enjoy the drink he’s serving you, looking for your approval became a big part of his mind lately.

Lifting your glass up to his and clinking them together, the liquor poured down the back of your throat filling your mouth with sweetness and warmth.

“Holy shit.”

“Good holy shit or bad holy shit?”

“No, very good. That’s actually delicious. It’s so clean and fresh.”

“That makes me so happy to hear.”

“I’m happy you’re happy.”

“Okay, beer next. This is just a standard sour, some lime and sea salt, sort of beach vibes.”

“Sounds amazing, okay.”

Tipping your head back you sipped at the foamy top of the glass, savoring the flavors in your mouth.

“I hate you so much.”

“What? Why?”

“Seungcheol, you're way too humble when you talk about your business, this shit is amazing. I said I hate you because I’m going to crave this shit and I’ll have to see you all the time.”

“I thought you liked seeing me all the time?”

“You’re okay.”

“I have to say it’s cool to be here with you without the dogs, not that they distract too much, but they definitely take away giving you my full attention.”

“I mean how could they not, they’re cute as fuck,”

“So are you.”

“Wow, two drinks in Cheol and you’re already calling me cute? I wonder what else you’ll say the more you drink?"

“Technically we’re four drinks in, but I guess I remember the time I spent with you more than you do. Did those drinks on the bench mean nothing to you?”

“Oh fuck, I did forget. I guess technically I’m five drinks in then, catch up, bitch.”

You and Seungcheol spent the rest of the night being greeted by his friends, most of them already assuming who you were, letting you know that Seungcheol talks about you more than you realized.

Feeling your blood alcohol content rising, you decided to take a step outside and refresh.

The bell of the door opened up behind you, putting you face to face with his cherry lips once again, watching them light up a hand rolled cigarette to his lips.

“Doing okay?”

“Yeah, just wanted to step out for a second. Are you good?”

“Very. Want a cig?”

“No, I’m good for now. Ask me again later.”

“So will there be a later? You’re not ditching me now?”

“I’d never do that.”

“So, y/n does this maybe get me a chance to take you on a date? I’m kind of drunk so I’m feeling oddly bold.”

“Is this not sort of a date?”

“I was hoping you thought so. Is that a yes?”

“Absolutely. I thought you’d never ask.”

“Before we go on our date though, y/n. I have one final question?”

“Yes?”

“Do you still think I’m boring?”

“A little.”

Seungcheol grabbed your waist and spun you around, causing his perfectly rolled tobacco to fall on the sidewalk.

Blissfully you were giggling and laughing under the red led lights of his bar.

“Take it back.”

“Nope.”

“Please.”

You looked into his puppy dog eyes and did something out of your comfort zone. Wrapped your hands loosely around his neck, placing a deepened kiss onto his lips.

His mouth tasted of cigarettes and salt with a hint of vanilla from the lip balm he always had on him.

“Is that a good ‘sorry I called you boring’ kiss?”

“It’ll do for now.”

“Good. They’ll be more where that came from.”

“Promise?”

“Pinky promise.”

You and Seungcheol unwrap from each other, finding Jeonghan standing and cheering in the window watching the two of you.

“Can’t believe I got a hot date and a sister for Kkuma all in one.”

“You lucky dog.”

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bleedingoptimism · 6 months

Text

Eddie is pacing, going to Tarja’s room and back to the kitchen where she’s sitting with a smile puffing her cute freckled cheeks and kicking her little feet back and forth.

He checks she has everything she needs, clothes, pajamas, scrunchies, and her drawing book. He makes sure he packed her Toothless toothbrush and her plushie. She’s been on a ‘How To Train Your Dragon’ phase for a while now.

He’s not usually that nervous about her leaving to stay at her father’s for the week.

But she’s not usually this excited either.

See, her asshole of a father, has a new boyfriend, and apparently, he’s amazing and Tarja loves him. And she can't wait to spend more time with him.

And Eddie, he’s kind of curious and not jealous. At all. Really. He’s just curious about him, he just can’t understand how his asshole of an ex can be dating someone that’s supposedly nice, funny, and caring. Someone who talks to his kid when she’s upset, picks her up from school on time, and spends time playing around with her outside when she gets the jitters.

Tommy, his ex, is an awful person. He was the worst thing that happened to him and Eddie would’ve loved to never see him again, he just happens to also be attached to be best thing that ever happened to him, his daughter.

A one-night stand that asked him for marriage after he knocked him up, (because his father forced him to, but Eddie found that out on the divorce) that Eddie had only agreed to marry because he was scared he wouldn't be able to afford to take care of a kid alone.

He filed for a divorce so quickly after, that it was almost an annulment. Thankfully, Tommy wasn’t as bad of a parent as he was a husband, determined to be better than his own old man. So Eddie had no problem sharing custody with him. They agreed on a visitation schedule without issues and they have been civil for the last six years.

And then Tommy got a new boyfriend. And Tarja loves him. And Eddie is not jealous. He’s not.

He’s just nervous because he’s coming to pick her up and he’s going to meet him for the first time and finally see what all the fuzz is about.

The doorbell rings and Eddie checks the time and grumbles when he sees he’s pleasantly on time. Tarja jumps off the stool and runs to the entrance, “Steve!” she screams excitedly as she opens the front door.

And Eddie stands there with a little backpack that is also shaped like Toothless as the most gorgeous man he’s ever seen in his life kneels in front of his daughter and hugs her close.

“Hello, little dragon! I missed you!” he greets her and Eddie does not notice how beautiful and melodic his voice is while Steve holds Tarja’s shoulders as she jumps up and down excitedly telling him everything she’s got planned for them to do with a soft smile on his face.

And then Steve looks up and Eddie sees the warmth in his pretty brown-green eyes and he feels like he just missed a step going down the stairs. He smiles dumbly back at him as Steve gets up with Tarja sitting on his waist and extends a hand to him,

“Hi! You must be Eddie! I’ve heard so much about you!” Eddie shakes his hand and gets stuck thinking about how soft they are instead of answering so Steve keeps talking, “Only good things!” he says nervously and Eddie shakes his head and stops thinking about the two moles on Steve’s left cheek and smiles back.

“It’s nice to finally meet you! Tarja won't stop talking about you” He says and hopes it doesn't come out a little bitter.

Steve smiles bashfully and pokes Tarja’s tummy, “Yeah, she’s a little chatterbox isn’t she? I heard she got that from you” he quips.

Eddie frowns about to jokingly act offended but Steve’s eyes go huge and he blushes, “Oh! No I meant that as a good thing! I love it, I love her, I mean-” he stammers and Tarja giggles at his nervousness and Eddie melts a little.

After they exchange information, just in case, Eddie needs to remind himself, and Eddie gives Steve Tarja’s backpack there’s not much more to say so he hugs her kid and kisses her goodbye.

Steve picks her up again, “C'mon let's go,” he tells her and then purses his lips a little, “Tommy is probably waiting” he sighs warily, and oh, that’s interesting.

He waves Eddie goodbye wiggling his fingers cutely and Eddie waves back and closes the door and frowns at it,

“Man… why couldn’t I have Tarja with Steve?”

👉 next part

☕🥐💕?

#steddie #stranger things #eddie munson #steve harrington #trans eddie munson #just a funny little thing teehee #i wrote something #was naming her tarja because of nightwish a good idea? well see i guess

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kitkatscabinet · 10 months

Text

WAYS TO SAY I LOVE YOU

Pairings: Peter B. Parker x reader, Miguel O’Hara x reader

Summary: the different ways the boys show their love for you

Peter

Brags about you to anyone and everyone. Talks about your achievements and shows off pictures when you aren’t there in person

You never need to ask for a hug. Peter always knows when your upset and is happy to be your own personal weighted blanket. Wrapping his bulk around you and whispering stupid jokes in your ear

Makes you dance with him. Pulls you up to slow dance through the apartment. He’s not very good and there isn’t always music, in which case he’ll serenade you himself. Something he’s even worse at, but it’s worth it to see the way your eye crinkle in joy

Has your back 100% of the time, is always down to shit talk coworkers and strangers that piss you off

Peppers your face in kisses, pulling you to him if you try and escape and tumbling over together in a pile of limbs and laughter

Will do all your favourite activities/watch your favourite shows without much question

Is willing to share the bed with millions of squishmallows/pillows/blankets. Even if it leaves little room for him.

Is your personal hype man. You could kill someone and Peter would think they deserved it, because you’re always right. You have never felt more loved than with Peter as he takes every opportunity to praise you.

Miguel

Brings you trinkets/gifts that remind him of you from every universe he visits

Reading together, cuddled up with different books or with your head on his lap as he reads aloud

Miguel is a very busy man and to an outsider it may look like you put more effort into the relationship but you can tell he loves you by the things he lets you get away with

He’ll endure ridiculous pet names like Pookie Bear if it makes you happy, even if he’ll grumble about it in public.

Will also play along when you put your whole weight on him to try and stop him leaving in the morning

Takes more breaks, actually starts to develop a nearly healthy work/life balance when he realises how upset you get at him for overworking

Non sexual showers where he’ll wash your hair even if he’s exhausted, letting you gently rinse his bruises and scrapes in return. Will also dry/brush your hair afterwards if possible

Regularly texts/calls/FaceTimes throughout the day to check up on you. Will always let you know without fail if something comes up and he can’t be there. Gets Lyla to check up on you a lot too

If you don’t speak Spanish already then he helps you learn (no he didn’t almost cry when you surprised him with it the first time)

He listens. Miguel could listen to you explain the process of paint drying and still find it interesting. He lets you rant for hours about your day or latest hyperfixation. It might not always seem like he’s engaged but he always remembers everything.

Shoulder/neck kisses !!!!

#atsv miguel #miguel ohara #x reader #miguel o’hara x reader #peter b x reader #peter b parker x reader #atsv x reader #peter b parker #across the spiderverse #across the spiderverse x reader #miguel o'hara

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junowritings · 5 months

Note

hi there ! i love your writing! could i request floyd with reader who genuinely cant tell if someone is being platonic or romantic to them; maybe them finally realizing floyd's affections towards them aren't just platonic? ty!!

Oooh all I can say is my condolences to poor reader lmao. Had so much fun imagining how this would pan out this was a cute idea! I'm glad you enjoy my stuff - hope you enjoy~ 🧡

=======

♡ Oh, well this is going to be so much fun for Floyd.

♡ Floyd recognizes a crush when he sees one. You’re a good match - you keep him entertained, and have the uncanny knack to get him to actually do things he’d usually get too bored of and ditch at a moment’s notice (Azul’s been trying to figure out how you manage that with no success because you have no idea why he listens to you either). Not to mention all of those cute little quirks and things that you do which the eel just can’t get enough of.

♡ And of course there’s your reactions too. The way your lips quirk when you smile, the sound of your laugh and the noises of surprise you make when he swoops in when you’re least expecting him. The way that you squirm when he pulls you into those notorious squeezes of his, thankfully nowhere near as bone crushingly tight as the ones that he’s subjected some poor unfortunate souls to. Floyd adores getting any kind of response out of you.

♡ It is glaringly obvious that he’s interested in you, at least to everyone else, and Floyd’s got no problem making it known either. The only issue is that you haven’t noticed yet. It would get on his nerves a little knowing that you have no idea that his affection isn’t just platonic, but that quickly fades once he realizes how fun this has the potential of being. Just how far can he push that obviousness until you finally realize he’s interested in ya?

♡ It’s light teasing at first. Well, as light as it can be coming from a Leech twin. Floyd’s already naturally pretty casual with acts of intimacy, always throwing an arm over your shoulder or leaning up against you whenever he’s in the nearby vicinity. So why should you assume anything’s up when that arm on your shoulder squeezes you close against his side, and lingers a little longer than normal? Or that he's just a little bit clingier than usual, resting his head atop yours or on your shoulder and looping an arm or two around your side whenever you’re near each other?

♡ But then come the little gifts. Little things that have caught his eye and he doesn’t think twice about dropping into your hands the second that he sees you. Gifts from Floyd can really be anything, from things he’s found and borrowed but ‘forgot’ to give back, to things he’s gotten from trips back home and practically shoved into your hands the second he’s back. You start to question the reason behind his gifts, and start to notice other signs too.

♡ When you come to the Monstro lounge Floyd will take food from the kitchen and add them on as freebies whenever he feels like it. He doesn’t bother telling Azul or Jade, but they’re already well aware and aren’t entirely inclined to stop him since getting you to spend time at the lounge means Floyd’s a lot easier to manage.

♡ Gets upset if you share it with your other friends though - it’s for you, and he’ll say as much when he pushes the treat closer towards you, making sure to keep it out of your friend’s reach. Ace complained once about all the freebies you’re getting, trying to prod you to find out what you did to get the Leech twin in such a good mood and if he could convince you to get him in the eel’s good books, all the while trying to steal a bite from the free dessert you’re picking at with your fork. That is until he catches Floyd looking at him from at the bar; he’s grinning but there’s not a hint of the fondness like when he looks at you. The message is clear - hands off, and you’ve never seen Ace give up on stealing your food so fast in your life as he almost shoves the dish into your blazer pushing it back to you.

♡ You’ve always struggled to discern platonic from romantic feelings, not wanting to immediately assume one and get it wrong only to make things awkward afterwards. So even once you suspect that something’s up, it’s hard to work up the courage to actually approach it. You doubt Floyd would make things awkward if you were wrong, but you doubt your pride could handle the relentless poking and prodding he’d subject your feelings to if you were wrong about him liking you. Staying quiet about it and just enjoying these little moments seems like the safest bet, right?

♡ You made the mistake of asking his brother once, but that was no help at all. If anything it left you feeling even more confused because do you really think that Jade will break the surprise so soon? Floyd isn’t the only one getting a kick out of watching you struggle to put the pieces together, and Jade is thoroughly entertained learning how oblivious you can be to what Floyd’s actually trying to do. Those little gifts of his aren’t just for show - they’re telltale signs of a merfolk’s interest to date you. Oh dear, it really is such a shame that he forgot to mention that little tidbit to you, isn’t it?

♡ There is a point where things get serious. The moment that Floyd decides that he’s fed up toying around and running circles around these feelings. Gets a little miffed realizing that you still haven’t figured out that these little gestures aren’t just something he’s doing for the hell of it - sure, they’re entertaining, but his patience wavers quickly at the best of times. Eventually, Floyd’s going to get tired of this game. Playing games with you is fun, and he loooooves teasing his lil Shrimpy and watching your face turn into all different funny expressions while you try to figure out what exactly his angle is. But there are better things to play, and this back and forth is coming to an end sooner rather than later.

♡ Doesn’t care where it is or who’s around to notice, as soon as he sees you after deciding he’s done messing about you barely have enough time to greet him and ask what he’s doing before you are quite literally swept off of your feet with the force of his hug. His arms are tight around you as he hugs you close, and it’s just tight enough that you have a sinking feeling that he’s going to squeeze you like you’ve seen him do to the people who break Azul’s contracts. You’re trying to wrack your brain to figure out what perceived slight you did to earn the backbreaking squeeze you’re sure he’s about to give you, maybe even mentally leaving Grim all of Ramshackle’s tuna in your imaginary will. Then he stops, chin hooking over your shoulder and that one dark strand of his hair tickling your face as he presses his cheek against yours with

♡ “Hey, Shrimpy~ ya know, you got to be real dense to miss that I really like you. Maybe I gotta prove it~?”

♡ The whole time he’s saying this, Floyd is dangerously close to giving you a nibble or two. Your only saving grace is that he’s much too interested in the reaction that you give him once you realize what he’s said. His mismatched eyes rake in every detail; the way your eyes widen almost comically, mouth dropping open like a fish trying to sputter your way through some kind of response to what was basically a confession. It’s so funny! This is the reaction he’d been waiting for, and he’s not gonna relent until you really understand that this is way more than simply liking you.

♡ Let’s just hope you don’t mind the squeezes, because that’s not letting up either. Why would he let his shrimpy go when it’s better to just keep em right by his side? Especially when he wants to hear what you’ve got to say now that you don’t have to stress your silly little head over if he likes you or not~

#twst #twst imagines #twst headcanons #twisted wonderland imagines #floyd x reader #twst floyd #floyd leech #floyd leech x reader #twisted wonderland headcanons #twisted wonderland #twst x reader

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ellabehavior · 11 months

Text

Matilda ~ JJ Maybank ✯

Summary: You’ve grown up not being able to show much affection because of your family, but JJ knows just how to heal your wounds.

Pairing: JJ Maybank x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Mention of abuse, a lil suggestive content

A/N: hope y’all enjoy! request r open!

You've always been rather cautious about accepting hugs from people. Even as a young child, you might have hesitantly accepted a hug or just stood there not really knowing what to do. Likewise, expressing your love has always been difficult for you because it’s not something you would do very often inside your house hold.

Your parents never really said the words ‘I love you’. Sure, they’d sometimes give words of affirmation once in every blue moon, or they might hug you on special occasions but you never really got the feeling of true family love.

As a kid you would always watch family movies, or look at your friends parents and wonder ‘why are they so nice?’ or ‘how come they rarely argue?’

That is when you started realizing this behavior is not normal.

But once you and JJ started dating, things started to change; your displays of affection began to get stronger and more obvious.

He showed you how to love.

Your dreams, your kisses, your hearts, and your love for each other were all shared by the two of you.

You and JJ both know every last detail about one another. You were able to wipe away every tear that came from JJ's memories with kisses since you were aware of JJ's father and his early years. This may be why you two matched so well.

However, your family? You preferred not to bring it up. Naturally, your partner was aware of the awful ways in which your parents treated you, but you would never go into detail because doing so would trigger unpleasant memories.

That is until one sleepless night you couldn’t hold it in anymore.

“Jay” you whispered through your tears trying to wake him up out of his sleep.

“Baby?” He rubbed his eyes and seen the tears pouring down your face “Baby no, come here.” He said with a pout and pulled you in.

“JJ I had a dream about my parents and it brought back everything, and my mom was telling me about how I didn’t deserve you and-”

JJ then placed a soft kiss on your lips to calm you down.

“Calm down baby, i’m right here for you. I’ll be here all night. It was just a dream, i’m forever yours I promise.” He says in a soothing voice while rubbing your back hoping it’ll calm you even a little bit.

Since your mother called you on the phone two days earlier, he was aware that something was wrong. You’ve have been so silent since that phone call, he was skeptical about what was said, but he decided to not push it unless you were ready to tell him.

After a few minutes of crying and back rubs you’ve finally chilled out enough to tell him what was going on.

“When my mother called me two days ago, I thought it would be good and we could just catch up. I thought she'd be happy of me for where I've gone in life, but all she did was yell and tell me how she wishes I were different. I've been having dreams ever since, and I can't handle it any more.” At the end of your sentence, your voice begins to tremble, indicating another sob.

JJ immediately notices this and pulls you in tighter.

“Baby, please don’t ever believe those words. I fell in love with you for who you are, your the most beautiful girl I have ever met. Everything about you is perfect to me, the way you giggle, the way you snore, and even when you upset me I can’t find a single flaw about you.” He says with his hands on both sides of your cheeks.

“I don’t deserve to be loved by someone like you.” you whisper

“Don’t even say that.” JJ says in a serious tone with tears starting to form in his eyes. “I wouldn’t even be able to think without you, much less live without you.”

The look in his eyes was very serious. You were his oxygen, he never wanted to hear something like that from you. Without you, he wouldn't be able to breathe.

JJ finally broke the built up tension and pressed your lips together. Minutes upon minutes of the need to be closer to eachother.

You depended the kiss and pushed JJ back so you were on top of him.

“Jay” you said staring into his eyes while unbuttoning his pants.

He softly pushed you off and buttoned his pants back up. “Not tonight baby, I want to show you my love in a different way.” he breathed out

“Okay.” you said while he laid down and pushed you against him.

That night all you guys did was share little pecks, talk about stupid things, and hold onto eachother tight.

This was it, this is what you’ve been searching for since you were 7. This is what your parents swore would never happen to you, This is true unconditional love.

“I love you J”

“I love you more.”

‘I can't be who you

want me to be if who that is isn't who I am.

To love me is to accept me.’

- Baggage Reclaim

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rainbow-femme · 5 months

Text

Thinking too much about AFTG again and I know we rag on Neil for being oblivious but I don’t think Andrew understands for most of the story that Neil likes him back

(FYI I haven’t read all the extra content, Nora may have said something about Andrew’s mindset that contradicts this, I don’t care it’s my literary analysis and I control my interpretation and the only canon that exists is what’s in the books. Also I’m Jewish, and the number one rule is anything can be true so long as you can back it up textually)

You’ve got the whole “I’m not your answer and you sure as fuck aren’t mine” line. By this point two things have happened recently: Neil has become outwardly more emotionally and physically vulnerable, and Neil has shown more interest in spending time with Andrew as well as interest in Andrew in general. And Andrew’s response to this seems to be the assumption that Neil is having a crisis he isn’t sharing and seems to have decided that Andrew is the answer to fixing that crisis. To be fair he is having a crisis, Andrew is just an unrelated benefit.

Which makes sense, most of his relationships are based, at least in Andrew’s mind, on him providing a service in exchange for someone’s presence in his life due to his belief that people will not be around him otherwise. So if Neil is looking at him in an open, appreciative, and interested way he seems to assume it’s because Neil, the terrified guy on the run from something, has found himself enjoying the stability Andrew provides and is seeing being near Andrew as a solution to his problems. That maybe Neil has tricked himself into thinking he has feelings for Andrew because he likes having someone take care of him and that’s the reason, and we see from Andrew stopping the kiss when Neil is upset that he does not consider being interested in someone while emotionally vulnerable to be real consent, therefore if Neil is interested in him due to being upset and afraid that is not Neil actually being interested. He also is clearly very agitated by this first kiss, seeming to see himself as a predator who lost control and harmed Neil by taking advantage of him.

He also continues to do nice things for Neil after getting back, despite initially seeming to express frustration, disinterest, and distaste for Neil. Giving him keys to the car, buying him a new charger, giving Neil the shotgun seat. Andrew’s habit of feeling the need to incentivize the people he cares for to stay with him, as well as what appears to naturally be his love language of giving gifts and acts of service as a replacement for verbally sharing emotions. I’m not saying that when he’s doing nice things it’s for personal gain, but I think part of him feels good doing it and part of him believes this is all he has to offer this person. He got back and didn’t say nice things to Neil because he can’t, but he can quietly take care of Neil in a way that says “please stay with me, I want you to be ok” that he verbally can’t. He knows Neil values the ability to leave upsetting situations, that Neil reacted positively the last time Andrew gave him keys, gives Neil a way to charge his phone ie have a lifeline to safety and Andrew when needed, and he’s saying that he still implicitly trusts Neil with things that are important to him. And of course shotgun means “I want you to be the person who is nearest to me”. He similarly starts making a habit of sitting next to Neil when the team is together. Andrew very much is a cat, he’s going to swat at you but also glue himself to your side

There’s also the various moments where Andrew states out loud that he has an attraction and growing emotional attachment to Neil that he has already written off as impossible. He calls Neil a pipe dream, says he knows nothing will come of having an interest in Neil without having made any attempts to see if Neil is interested. If you follow up a confession of interest with a statement that nothing will happen, you can’t be hurt by rejection because you didn’t give the person a chance to reject you.

And it doesn’t seem like it’s because Andrew is purposely avoiding attachments to people. Most of the effort he puts into his life is in his relationships, specifically into giving people reasons to stay near him. He makes the deals with Kevin and Aaron, he could have gone to a school with a more competitive Exy program but went to one where Nicky and Aaron could come and be on the team and in fact made that a requirement, he proves to Kevin that he made the right choice in making Andrew his shield by attacking anyone who hurts Kevin and putting a target on his own back. Before the start of the books we know he went out of his way to connect with Renee and do things for her that meant a lot to her, things that again seem to represent “I am doing her a favor, therefore she will be more likely to stay.” And anything else could be written off as born again Christian charity rather than acknowledge she has love and care for him.

He doesn’t see an attempt at connecting with Neil to be useless because he has no interest in building relationships with people, if there’s anything Andrew is passionate about it’s building and maintaining relationships with people. He sees it as obviously useless because there’s no way Neil would legitimately want to be with Andrew in the same way that Andrew wants him, that it is impossible to consider Neil reciprocating the way he’s feeling because all he wants is Neil himself and he doesn’t think anyone could just want him and think it’s enough.

Neil says he allowed himself to be abused by the Raven’s for two weeks on the chance he could help Andrew, that he wants to care for Andrew even without any personal benefit, and that is when Andrew calls him a pipe dream. Neil has just said that he, the guy who previously was so terrified for his own safety that he put it above all else, would willingly sacrifice his safety for Andrew. When Neil says this Andrew covers his mouth to make him stop talking, which to me suggests that this revelation was an absolute gut punch to him, that what happened to Neil was not only for his sake but accomplished nothing. Andrew’s reaction to Neil saying this is to say that Neil was supposed to be a side effect of the drugs. Meaning what Neil just said made him feel so strongly for Neil that he previously assumed it could not possibly be something he naturally has the capacity to feel.

(And he stills says that he doesn’t think he could ever have from Neil what he wants. So yeah Neil isn’t the only one who can hear a heartfelt confession and come to the conclusion that the other person is completely uninterested)

Also the whole “there is no this” conversation they loop through a few times. Again, Andrew loves building relationships, but they all are ticking clocks in his head, most of them graduation unless he can come up with something to convince them to stay. And then Neil keeps trying to say that there exists a relationship between them that has not been carefully negotiated with a clear end date, which is probably terrifying to a guy who doesn’t think he can trust anyone unless he is providing them something that makes him more useful around than not.

What Neil is proposing is that Andrew has intrinsic value and his presence is all Neil wants, and that probably seems terrifying and untrue. If Neil isn’t getting a tangible benefit that outweighs any perceived inconveniences, and if there is no point where they “re-up” their contract, then at any moment Neil could change his mind and take this thing away from Andrew. He’s had people he loved decide he’s not worth it, he knows it can happen and how terrible it is to experience. He willingly dealt with Drake and harmed himself to keep Cass, and he still lost her because he in and of himself wasn’t enough to be kept and loved because he wasn’t easy enough to love, he was broken, he was damaged. There can’t be a non transactional relationship between them because Andrew can’t see himself being enough and thinks losing it would be too painful to willingly risk

(Nicky, Kevin, and Aaron also seem to have this same view as Neil in their own way of Andrew’s inherent worth to them. Nicky really deserves more recognition for clawing his way to happiness then willingly giving it all up and upending his life and doing things repeatedly that make him unhappy because he cares so much for Aaron and Andrew, aligning himself against possible friends who could make him happy because he will always choose supporting Andrew over himself. And you have Aaron showing that he will fight Andrew tooth and nail if it means they can have a good and lasting relationship, and we see Kevin form genuine love and affection for Andrew outside of their deal, but again Andrew seems to view the relationships at the time as transactional or obligatory on their ends)

Or my favorite, the scene where Andrew makes a comment about Neil’s “neck fetish.” Neil has kissed his neck only about two times by that point, and both times it has elicited what is clearly a pleasurable response from Andrew. But Andrew can’t accept the idea that Neil is doing something with no benefit to himself and only a benefit to Andrew, that he is choosing to take time away from his own immediate pleasure to do something solely for Andrew’s enjoyment of the moment

Neil responds to the comment by saying “You like it, I like that you like it.” Neil is saying that he cares enough about Andrew to have paid attention to what pleases him and wants to take the time when they’re together to make Andrew feel good in a way that Andrew makes him feel good, that he knows Andrew has trauma with physical touch on most of his body but this is a way he can reciprocate that has no negative connotations for Andrew and serves solely to make him feel good. And Andrew does not or cannot let himself see it that way because it’s too vulnerable.

The sex is supposed to be transactional, this is what Andrew has to offer to make Neil stay with him, uninterrupted time of Andrew making him feel good and asking for nothing in return. Neil is breaking the rules, he’s making it reciprocated, if he is making Andrew feel good then Andrew doesn’t have that safety net of being the one with something to offer. So it has to be something that secretly benefits Neil, it has to be that Neil is getting something out of it or Andrew is back to not having anything special that he offers to make Neil stay with him. If it’s just Neil sitting back while Andrew gets him off then Andrew is automatically the most convenient sexual partner for Neil and he won’t look for someone else. If it’s reciprocal, then it stops being a favor Andrew is doing and takes effort on Neil’s end, as well as means the sex includes Andrew knowing what it’s like to be loved and cared for, which means he will feel it’s absence when Neil inevitably leaves because Andrew isn’t convenient enough.

It honestly seems like the turning point is his conversation with Aaron about breaking their deal, Aaron making him choose their deal or Neil. Because it A. Forces Andrew to see that Aaron intends to stay in his life without the deal, meaning that yes one of the most important people in Andrew’s world loves him without a contract. And B. It forces Andrew into a position where he has to take a leap of faith that Neil isn’t going to just walk away, that Neil sees Andrew the way Andrew sees him. And I wonder if Aaron brought up the conversation he had with Neil, that Neil said he didn’t think Andrew would fight for him, and he realized that Neil not only has been thinking about him the way he was thinking about Neil, but that he had this person in his life that he cared about and he was acting in a way that made that person not feel valued and it could probably cause the very thing he wants to avoid by pushing him away.

So you finally get the very end of the last book where Andrew doesn’t deny it when Neil says Andrew likes him, which is for him incredibly vulnerable. He’s shown that he will always protect Neil without their deal of protection, and Neil has shown that he sees everything about Andrew that other people don’t like and he loves Andrew anyway.

Because the story is from Neil’s point of view we see his internal growth as he learns to recognize and accept love and care from others but Andrew has been doing the same, realizing and trusting that Kevin and his family will still be there even if he has nothing tangible to offer, and accepting that someone could genuinely know and understand him, all the things that make him inconvenient, and still want him with no extra incentive because even as broken as he sees himself to be he still has value to others and he can trust Neil in the way he wants Neil to trust him

#long post #this got so much longer than I intended oh my god #this was supposed to be like 3 paragraphs max #I have a lot of thoughts about Andrew desperately wanting love without thinking he can have it #even though he has people who love him #aftg #all for the game #tfc #andrew minyard #neil josten #andreil

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cloudyyoimiya · 1 year

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hello cloudd. may i req any bsd character (i’d love to see doa though ahah i love them) get jealous over their s/o hanging out more with another bsd character, but they ‘can’t’ do anything because it’s a co-worker of theirs? i hope it makes sense.. totally isn’t an ask for yandere hcs

omg i’m so happy to see you in my inbox krei! anyways yes that made sense don’t worry! also i hope you dont mind that i actually did the main three of the doa! they all make me giggle and kick my feet

Their Darling Hangs Out With Their Coworker; Sigma, Nikolai Gogol, and Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Format: Headcanons

Possible warnings: Yandere/dark content, unhealthy relationships, jealousy, manipulation.

Sigma

Simply put, Sigma gets jealous very easily. You’re the meaning to his life, the candle that led him out of the dark. So when you started your friendship with Nikolai, Sigma was distressed.

He had no clue what to do with himself. Sigma cares about your happiness, so he wouldn’t try to do anything too rash, but he’d still want to distance you from him.

Sigma knows that Nikolai is a very unstable individual, so he was absolutely terrified of leaving you alone with him. If you and Nikolai happened to be in the casino, Sigma would constantly be watching you via security cameras. He wanted to make sure that the jester didn’t do anything… unsavory towards you.

It irritated Sigma that he couldn’t just get rid of Nikolai.

Nikolai was his coworker after all.

If he even laid a hand on him, Fyodor would know and he’d be severely punished.

It made Sigma want to rip his hair out.

It made him feel sick.

He absolutely hated it.

If he ever caught you getting put in danger, Sigma would immediately take you back from Nikolai and lock you up for a few weeks. He’d then lecture you about how terrible Nikolai is and how he’d hurt you in a snap.

Sigma might also feed you some lies about Nikolai. He knows everything about you; your likes and dislikes. He’d use that to his advantage and tell you how Nikolai did all of the things you don’t like with a serious expression.

Of course you believed him because he’d never lie to you, right?

He’d then try to guilt you into staying away from Nikolai for good measure. You wouldn’t want to upset your boyfriend and future spouse, would you? You don’t want to leave him, right?

In all honesty, he would be the best out of the three.

Nikolai Gogol

Let’s say for Nikolai you befriended Fyodor. The two of you would sometimes sit in his office and just talk, or sometimes he’d bring you out for some tea. Fyodor’s intent wasn’t anything romantic, he just thought that your views of the world were so.. interesting.

Being the good friend you are, you always joined him whenever he asked you to hang out.

Nikolai was absolutely stuck on what to do. He didn’t approve of your friendship with Fyodor one bit, but he was happy to see you getting along with someone he admired.

His conflicting feelings made him want to kill the rat. He absolutely hated feeling chained down his emotions like this.

It left such a bitter taste in his mouth.

He’d do anything to make it stop.

One time he actually did come close to killing Fyodor.

You were out at a bookstore and Fyodor had joined you. Nikolai would have stayed in the shadows, silently watching the two of you. Eventually Fyodor had put his hand on your back, and apparently that was the final straw for the jester.

It took everything in him to not take you away right then and there.

Eventually when you and Fyodor parted ways, Nikolai magically appeared beside you with an unreadable expression. You had asked him what was wrong but he only grabbed your wrist with an iron grip.

He brought you back to your shared apartment and locked you in your room until Nikolai sorted out his emotions.

Nikolai is a sadistic yandere, yes, but he wouldn’t be sadistic towards you without any reason; or being caught up in his emotions for that matter.

What it all comes down to is that he still loves his darling despite how they made him feel some wretched emotion besides love.

He’d eventually calm down and trap you in your apartment until you can ‘behave yourself.’

Fyodor Dostoyevsky

For Fyodor let’s say that you befriended Sigma. You originally approached him since he seemed lonely and needed some time off from work, but over time your friendship with him grew. Fyodor only watched as this happened on the side lines.

Surely you weren’t stupid enough to talk to another man while you had him, right?

Well, he was wrong; though he slightly expected this from you. You always cared about other people, even if they didn’t care about you.

Normally if something like this was to happen with anyone else, he’d kill off your friend immediately. But since Sigma is one of his coworkers and is vital to his plan, he’s unable to take care of him.

That fact slightly infuriates him, but he’d never let it show. He’d let it boil under the surface until he eventually confronts you.

Fyodor reached his breaking point when Sigma was fast asleep in his office and you put your jacket over his back so he wouldn’t get cold.

You’re only supposed to be doing those type of things with Fyodor.

It made him almost want to kill you along with Sigma.

Oh so gradually Fyodor would start feeding lies to Sigma about how you’re only using him, and in return he’d tell you lies about Sigma, saying that he’s an awful person that only wishes to see you fail.

Fyodor’s lies made the two of you extremely angry at each other, and eventually the two of you would stop talking.

Fyodor would let you cry to him with open arms. He’d be there to comfort you and tell you that everything is all right.

He’d be there to tell you that other people only wish to hurt you.

Locking you away wouldn’t be his solution for this issue, but if something similar happens again in the future, he may consider it. He won’t be so nice next time.

Fyodor would be the worst to have out of the three in terms of mentality. Let’s just hope that you don’t break easily.

this was my first yandere ask on this acc! i hope you liked it <3

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imaginebeautifulworlds · 4 months

Text

Loved By Seven | Chapter 3

Genre: Hybrid!AU, Poly!AU, Mate!AU, romance, fluff

Pairing: OT7 x Reader

Characters: Human!Reader, Peacock!Seokjin, Serpent!Yoongi, Hawk!Hoseok, White Tiger!Namjoon, Merman!Jimin, Leopard!Taehyung, Wolf!Jungkook

Summary: Hiking was just an activity to get you out of the apartment, the last thing you imagined was ending in a whole different world by touching a jewel. That not being enough you end up meeting seven hybrids, and they all claim you shared the Connection with each of them making you their partner for life

Notes: Hi! I swear I didn't dissappear it's just that adut life is really complicated and I kinda forgot my inspiration for this series, but after reading the first two chapters I knew I wanted to write again so here I am. I already have the script for the fourth chapter, that actually was going to be in the third but I just wrote a lot for this one so it had to be passed to the next chapter. For those who are still here thank you so much. Likes, reblogs, comments are always appreciated. English is not my first language so pardon me if anything is misspelled or grammatically incorrect. Also the main idea came from a webtoon but I can’t remember it’s name. Enjoy!

While you and Jiwoo are in dreamland Taehyung decides to order a pizza since his pantry is basically empty, which upsets him because he can't take care of you as a good partner would I have to buy groceries first thing in the morning. During the waiting time for the delivery he just watches you sleep, even if he thinks it's creepy, in his eyes you're so perfect and he's so happy he finally found you that he doesn't care, as long as you don't know of course; after 35 minutes the pizza arrives with an ecstatic Taehyung giving a very good tip.

Walking toward his bedroom, the leopard finally wakes you up after having an internal battle about letting you sleep or feeding you. You start to feel light touches on your face, not knowing what they were but liking the warmth they provide, you get closer to the source; awakening more you realize those touches are little kisses on your cheeks, and never been woken up like that you open your eyes a little bit, only to find a boxy smile, brown eyes, dirty blonde hair and a pair of animal ears with yellow spots surrounded by black on top of the head. A little bit surprised, but not scared, you fully open your eyes because of the closeness between you two. "What happened?" Your voice comes out a little bit groggy, something Taehyung finds cute "nothing happened, I just decided to order pizza and it just got here" he says turning towards the bedside table to hand you a plate with pizza on it "Thanks Taehyung" you say staring deeply at the pizza, it surprises you that in this world there is something called pizza and it's really similar too, which only adds more questions about this place and the similarities it has with your own world. However your train of thought stops when your stomach makes a very loud rumble "I'm really hungry, sorry" you say sheepishly looking at the plate but definitely not at Taehyung "It's okay, you've had a long day Beautiful" he says adding the pet name just because he loves this flustered side of you, apparently your stomach was so loud Jiwoo says "Hey N/N, did you buy pizza for yourself again?" And wakes up completely to recognize her surroundings "Oh it's Taehyung" she says looking for her piece of pizza but can't find it "Mmm...Taehyung, did you only bring pizza for F/N" she asks unbelievably "No?...I mean of course not, yours is down the hall" the leopard nervously responds looking everywhere but Jiwoo "I'll bring it immediately" he answers walking out of the room to bring her a slice.

While you were sleeping and then enjoying an awesome pizza someone was climbing up the same mountain you climbed down that day, just with a very different purpose...a more evil one. When they got to the cave they immediately noticed something different...like something is missing, walking inside faster they find that the precious gem, the most powerful thing there is in this world, is not where it's supposed to be. "Damn it" they scream angrily "Who the hell took my precious gem".

After enjoying a very delicious pizza, OMG is possible that the pizza here is better than the one home you couldn't help but think while drinking the soda Taehyung, who left to wash the dishes, brought for you. Feeling really tired from the bizarre and eventful day you ask Jiwoo "Hey, where is all of our stuff…and isn't this room really big for a guest room?" with a smile Jiwoo tells "This is not a guest room, I'm pretty sure it's his room" "What? So when we came in he deliberately put me inside his room?" you ask with surprise and eyes wide open "Yep, I'm guessing he wanted to be with you, but I don't think in a sexy way…yet" "Jiwoo!...don't say that" you whisper-yell afraid Taehyung might hear the nonsense she just said, at this point you feel blushing so much in just a day is going to affect your health "Oh, and I took everything out of the backpacks and accommodated in the bathroom or that drawer I found empty, well a lot of drawers are empty like he's expecting someone to fill them one day" Jiwoo says the last while wiggling her eyebrows at you and the only thing you do is throw the nearest pillow you could find at her, landing on her face. Taehyung couldn't help but smile while listening to the conversation you two were having, it's not his fault his animal ears are very sensitive and have better hearing, and in all honesty Jiwoo wasn't wrong; when he was looking for a place to live he knew he had to have a big space for when his partner moved in which included leaving empty drawers where they could leave their stuff without problem. "No, but for real N/N I think he wanted to stay here with you because after putting you down on the bed he walked out and I think I heard my name, maybe leading me to a guest room, but there was no way I was going to leave you alone with a man we barely know" "Thanks Ji" you throw her a grateful smile, Taehyung hears this and his smile turns into a sad frown Does she not want me? He couldn't help but think No, no…maybe she just wants to feel comfortable with someone she knows…yes, yes that's it…I just have to win her trust and we're gonna become closer…and-and then we can sleep together and I can get to know her and she can get to know me all these thoughts transform that frown into a big smile again.

Knocking on the his room's door, Taehyung finds you trying to get up "Hey hey Beautiful, what are you doing? You heard Nia, you can't put pressure on your ankle" he rushes to your side and grabs your head and stomach to put you back on the bed "Mmm Taehyung? I need to change myself into my pj's" you show him what's in your hands, a pair of pants and shirt, and a tiny smile I think he really cares about me "Oh, uh sure-sure" he takes a step back and touches his neck in embarrassment "Pretty smart huh? N/N is very through, we had a lot of important stuff in our backpacks, who knew they could become handy" Jiwoo says stepping out of the bathroom, Wow…she even knows how to take care of others, my Beautiful is so smart and cute and likes to take care of others it's the only thing the leopard can think after hearing that "So, do you need help to get to the bathroom?" he asks already putting his hands under your neck and knees "Oh no there's no nee…" you start but Jiwoo interrupts "Don't worry big guy, I can help her just fine…you should go and sleep too, today has been a very long day and you should take rest" the smirk she's wearing grows wider when Taehyung unconsciously pouts "Taehyung? Ji is right, you must be exhausted too…you know carrying me today, dealing with us and everything" you smile at him in appreciation and a little embarrassed after saying the carrying part "It's okay I don't mind taking care of you, it's a great honor…but I guess you're right I am a little tired so I'm going to grab my PJ's and head for the guest room" So this IS his room you and Jiwoo think, he walks towards the walk-in closet and exist with clothes in his hand, however before leaving the room he approaches the side of the bed you're in and crouches down next to you "Goodnight Beautiful" he closes the distance between you two and you're thinking OMG he's going to kiss me on the lips he deviates and kisses your forehead, and you feel how that kiss is way more romantic than anything else he could've done. The leopard separates from you seeing how you have your eyes closed and very red cheeks. Opening your eyes you see the biggest boxy smile yet, knowing you now have him in your mind he stands up and exists saying "Goodnight" to Jiwoo, she just waves her hand back at him.

Replaying what just happened in your head you're unknowingly touching your forehead, Jiwoo snaps her fingers in front of you to take you out of your daze "N/N...N/N hey hey!" "Huh? Jiwoo did that just happened? Did he really kissed me?" still with your hand up your head you ask with big sparkling eyes "N/N" she sighs "He just kissed your forehead…let's get you up and into the bathroom so you can change" nodding at Jiwoo's words you grab her shoulder and support your arm on the bed and take a boost to get up without putting your bad foot on the floor. With Jiwoo's help you hop to the bathroom floor "I can take it from here Ji" "Are you sure" "Yeah, I need to do certain things here by myself and when I get out you can help me hop back to the bed" "Okay, be careful" you nod and close the door, turning around you hop towards the toilet and relieve yourself after all that happened today you really needed to go, thinking it would be best to change your clothes while sitting you do it successfully; getting up from the toilet you hop until you're in front of the sink and proceed to wash your teeth with your toothbrush Ji had left ready for you, watching your face on the mirror you see how sweety and dirty your face is I need to wash my face with that in mind you start looking through Taehyung's stuff until you find a face soap and moisturizer Taehyung I'm sorry for going through your stuff but I really need to at least wash my face…I miss my skincare products you sigh and open the faucet to splash water on your face and with a little of the liquid soap you make foam and wash your face, you spend a minute getting rid of all the dirt and sweat from the day and open the faucet again to wash all the soap from your face and then take a bit of moisturizer to apply it to your face. In another room a happy leopard is thinking I hope my Beautiful is using my products, I know Jiwoo said they brought certain necessities but not everything can fit into those backpacks. Once done you open the door and Jiwoo gets up from the bed and walks towards you, offering you her shoulder you grab it and start hopping towards your side of the bed, laying down Jiwoo puts your foot on top of a pillow and walks for the wall turning off the light and goes back to her side to lay down "Goodnight Ji" "Goodnight N/N"; after hearing you Taehyung also goes to sleep knowing you're now resting, in his house, under his protection.

On your second day you and Jiwoo wake up next to each other under the sunlight entering through the curtain but also because of the ruckus you're hearing outside the room. "What the hell is that guy doing so early in the morning" Jiwoo says covering her face with her arm to prevent the sunlight hitting her eyes "I don't know maybe we should go and see" once you say that Jiwoo gets up and goes to your side to help you up and walk/hop to the bathroom to wash your teeth. Once that is done you go towards the sound and find Taehyung murmuring "Damn it, I hope she didn't wake up by that pan falling" "I guess that's an understatement, by the way you did wake us up" Jiwoo enters with you to the kitchen, and the boy turns around surprised with big wide eyes "I-I didn't hear you getting up, I'm sorry…Did I wake you up?" saying the last with a sad pout on his face Why is he so cute? Shouldn't he be intimidating being a leopard and all? You couldn't help but think watching his face and sitting in a stool in front of him (separated by the aisle of course) . "Ummm…yes" you say with a nervous smile "But don't worry, I mean after all we are your guests…What time is it?" you say confused "It's 7:30…I wanted to leave you breakfast before leaving for work, but I woke up late since my phone died and everything went downhill from there" "Wait, phone?" Jiwoo asks surpirsed, and Taehyung only shows her an actual cellphone just like the ones you have in your world but it looks way more advanced "Mmm…have you never seen a phone before?" Taehyung asks Where are they from? Because everyone has phone, don't they? "We know what a phone is, I guess we just didn't think you would have too" You answer him "Why wouldn't I have one?" While saying this Jiwoo exists the kitchen and comes back with your phones "Ours don't work here" she shows him Wow these ones are kinda old no wonder they don't work Taehyung thinks but doesn't say anything.

Interrupting his examination on your phones, his own chimes with a new message from his manager Hey Taehyung we are all ready for the shoot, where are you? "Damn it" He murmurs "Do you have to go?" He nods sadly at your words "It's okay we can cook it's no problem, we are already imposing so much to expect you to cook as well" and he grimaces because there's not much to cook with "It's just that there is not much to cook with…I'm sorry, I'm such a bad partner" he ducks his head with his animal ears also down in embarrassment and sadness "I swear I can take good care of you…it's just yesterday was grocery shopping day but I found you and your ankle was hurt and-and…" he's just rambling and talking so fast you interrupt him by calling his name "Hey, hey Taehyung? Taehyung?" he raises his head to look at you, and you notice his eyes with unshed tears and still animal ears down just like a kitty I have to say something to calm him, something that can work, that way he can go to work otherwise I'm afraid he's going to stay here and without a job…whatever his job is "It's okay…not having groceries doesn't mean you're a bad partner…uh…this is a way for me to show you I can be a good partner as well don't you think? I mean proving to you that I can cook…and you're a-a good partner because you took really good care of me yesterday" you smile at him Is she accepting me? Is she falling for him already? There were two kind of thoughts after your words. With a boxy smile and no more tears in his eyes he says "Okay, I'll leave now" "Okay, have a great day at work" you wave while he picks up his phone and keys, once he's at the door Jiwoo talks "Wait Taehyung, what day it is?" "Well, yesterday was the last day of the weekend, today is Alday the first day of the week" with a confused stare he answers What a strange question "Okay, thank you, have a nice day" "Bye Beautiful" he opens the door and turns to you "Please eat" "Bye Taehyung" you say in a soft tone and very bright cheeks, and he closes the door once he got that cute reaction out of you.

"Well we're definitely not in Bastion" Jiwoo says once the leopard is out of the apartment "So are we really considering the possibility of teletransportation" you say observing her walking towards the other side of the aisle facing you "I don't think is a possibility anymore N/N, I mean unless we are having the same lucid dream we're actually talking with people who have animal traits, animal parts and can transform into animals" "Also, it's a world so similar yet advanced than ours" you add "Wait, I'm hungry. Let's make something before we continue this" Jiwoo laughs "Please don't change…ever" you throw her a smile at her words.

Wow he was not lying when he said there was no groceries you smile a little remembering his sad face and I'm not lying about how I almost coo when his animal ears got down just like a kitty…he's definitely making me feel things…but I have to pull myself together I just met him and we're from very different worlds you sigh at that last thought while hopping and looking through the refrigerator and the pantries "Sooooo I can make us meat with tomatoes and onion sauce, hard eggs and milk, is that okay with you?" you turn to look at her "Yes, but you shouldn't be standing up you're gonna make your ankle hurt" Jiwoo says worriedly "First, I'm not supporting my ankle" you show your bandaged ankle at her "and second, you can't cook even if it's to save your life so this has to be on me…hey were are the tuppers from the night at the mountain?" you start cooking the eggs and the meat "Heeey, it's not my fault I'm not particularly skilled at cooking and I took them out yesterday and put them at the dishwasher I guess he washed them" "Oh okay" a small smile passed through your lips while you chop the tomatoes and onions for the sauce "N/N what was that about being a good partner for him by cooking" you turn at her words and watching everything was cooking well, you walk to the aisle and sit to rest your ankle "Well…I mean you saw his face, he was so sad because of groceries and I knew he wasn't going to take any answer so I said something I knew would work…besides he had to go to work" you defend yourself "So you believe him? The whole partner Connection thing?" "I don't know Ji, we are in a different world like you said and it is known that some animals partner for life so what if here it's something like that" "Wait are you saying you are accepting him?" she raises her eyebrows in a sexy joking manner, you stand up when the meat starts to sizzle "I don't know…I do feel something when he looks at me and when he calls me beautiful" you say the last word lower and with your heart racing just by thinking of the he says the word, with so much emotion and tenderness "OMG I can't believe it took for us to be in a whole different world for you to be interested in someone" Jiwoo's tone is like she's offended, and yeah, once you turn to see her face there is an offended expression on it "But who knows if it lasts, maybe is a malfunction because how can we be together when we are from so far away" "I think…maybe…this is the reason we came here" you look at her with thoughtful expression "I mean when you two are looking at each other it's like I'm not even here…and I'm pretty sure you forget about your best friend at those moments" and you can't believe she's pouting "I-I-I do not!" "I can't blame you, he's really cute and hot" she smiles and winks at you, feeling your whole body palpitating at how fast and loud your heart is moving inside you, and knowing the best thing to do to avoid her is turning around, turning off the stove and plating the breakfast. Jiwoo stands up to take the plates and puts them on the aisle, you hop and sit on the stool and start eating with her doing the same in front of you with a teasing smile.

Chapter 4

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#kpop #kpop stories #kpop scenarios #bts #bts series #bts scenarios #bts hybrid series #bts hybrid au #hybrid!au #hybrid bts #hybrid au #bts hybrid x reader #bts x reader #bts poly au #ot7 x reader

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kiy-anna · 11 months

Text

Am I Feeling Love?

Part 1 (You Are Here) Part 2 Part 3a Part 3b

Characters: Azul Ashengrotto x Fem!Reader

Synopsis: From the moment Azul Ashengrotto heard of soulmates as a small child, he had a vision of a beautiful life with someone who was meant for him - regardless of what he was or would become…

Word count: 5.3k+

Warnings: Some Yandere elements

Notes: I wanted to thank @yanderloversworld on tumblr for the yandere!Azul w/ Soulmate S/O headcanons/backstory that I saw for inspiring this piece. I’ve never written anything like this before, but I wanted to give my hand at it - especially since it involves my favorite cecaelia character from twisted Wonderland. You can check it out here: https://www.tumblr.com/yandereloversworld/718766985773760512/yanazul-with-a-soulmate-so?source=share

The two songs used to inspire this story:

Am I Feeling Love? (The Thief and the Cobbler/Arabian Knight Soundtrack): https://youtu.be/NXYnClTZ4QY

One Day She'll Love Me (The Emperor's New Groove Soundtrack): https://youtu.be/8Sv3ECj7PdY

***I have an update! Part 2 now Available to read on my side blog @ashensgrotto***

***

I close my eyes and see his eyes

So soft and warm and clear

I dream awake of holding her

I dream that she’s right here

I sense in all his silences

More than his words could say

‘Don’t fight your feelings’ says my heart

A heart I will obey

***

“Azul… we need to talk.”

The sound of his mother’s broken voice pulled Azul’s attention to the larger cecaelia as all eight of his tiny tentacles stilled, each and every one of his appendages dropping an assortment of books, quills, and shells to the grotto’s floor as the silver-lavender haired boy looked upon his mother. The typically confident cecaelian now appeared scared and upset; her pale baby blue eyes were wide with worry and her ruby lips were set in a straight line - her heavy-set body swayed with the current that entered their home while her black-colored tentacles fidgeted nervously, the lavender underbelly of each appendage curling into itself repeatedly before releasing its grip on emptiness.

Azul stood, his own appendages curling inward, “Can this wait, momma? I’m very busy at the moment-”

“I’m afraid it can’t, baby,” his mother entered his room before perching herself on his bed, tapping the seafoam cushion, “come here.”

Azul sat beside his mother, looking down at his hands before looking up at his mother, who watched him with interest.

“Zully… the neighbors have told me they’ve seen you sneaking out at night,” his mother spoke quietly, “and it has been apparently going on for a while - without my knowledge. You and I both know that night is a terrible time to be going out, especially alone - you’re smart enough to know that you could’ve been seriously injured or killed by the creatures that lurk just beyond the reef of our city. Do you know how heartbroken I would be if I lost you?”

“I know, momma… but, I promise I have a good reason!”

“What good reason would you have for sneaking out in the middle of the night?”

“My soulmate.”

His mother looked taken back, her hand reaching to clutch the Nautilus shell necklace that rested on her collarbones as her already wide eyes widened further, “...S-Soulmate?”

“Yes!” Azul’s powder-blue eyes sparkled like gems in a treasure chest as a huge grin spread across his features, “I overheard some of the merkids talking about them at school a few weeks ago - o-of course I had initially thought they were talking about me, since I seem to come up in conversation here and there… but still! Oh, momma! To know that there’s someone out there that is literally MEANT to be WITH ME! Me! Azul Ashengrotto!”

“Zully, now wait a minute-”

“At first the concept did fascinate me,” Azul continued, slowly standing and moving to the opposite end of his room while ignoring his mother’s words, “and what intrigued me more than anything was that my soulmate would love and cherish every last thing about me - not the way the other merkids see me as; a pathetic, fat… ugly crying octopus fry that can’t even excel in studies or athletics. The silly little octo-twerp that’s an ink spiller.”

“Zully, you know that’s not-”

“But you know what momma? Thinking about my soulmate has made the days so much easier, even when I’m getting bullied - I think about them seeing what those other merkids are doing and they put a stop to it, saying things like, ‘Leave Azul alone! He’s not a pathetic little octo-twerp!’” Azul turned to his mother again, his tentacles writhing with excitement, “So, to be ready to meet them, I’ve been working to increase my knowledge - I want to be so powerful like the great Sea Witch herself that my soulmate will know who I am by sight alone! I’ve studied every book I could get my hands on and have memorized every single potion recipe there is available - even learning how to improve its effects and prolong them even! I’ve even studied every law text there is in the Atlantica public library - I have every law memorized word for word.”

His mother sighed, running a hand through her silvery locks, the motions creating little bubbles that appeared as she let out a sigh, “Azul, there’s something you should know-”

“As for the sneaking out,” Azul continued, throwing his hands behind his back as his fingers twisted together while he rocked back and forth on the edges of his eight appendages, “I was searching for my soulmate. I don’t know if they are here in the Coral Sea or not-”

“Azul, please listen to me-”

“But I wanted to see if I could find them. The first few nights after learning about their existence, I was having trouble sleeping - so I started doing a short swim to clear my head. I promise I wasn’t going too far away from the house! However, on those walks, it got me thinking that maybe instead of sleeping, I should be searching for them. There was no better use of my time than to strive for a better life with someone who must sense my loneliness like I sensed theirs…”

“...If they weren’t so rare, baby.”

Azul snapped to attention, his eyes wide, “W-What?”

His mother rested one hand on her knees while the other rubbed at her forehead, “Zully, I know and understand your longing to belong and to have a friend - trust me, I’ve been there. However, you can’t fixate on a single being that you hope to encounter at some point in your life. Finding that so-called ‘other half’ is like - well - like the story of the mermaid princess and her longing to be with a human. It’s a rare occurrence that only happens once in a millennium if not longer. Many times, people - humans, fae, and merfolk alike - often settle for someone they are content and happy with, someone that isn’t their other half.”

Azul stared in shock, inky tears threatening to spill down his chubby cheeks, as his hands balled into fists, “No! No! That isn’t true! What about you and daddy when he was alive?! Both of you were soulmates!”

“No we weren’t… At least, I don’t think we were,” Azul’s mother came forward, resting a hand gingerly on her son’s shoulder, “Anyone can be happy with or without their soulmate, Azul. There’s no reason you should go to such lengths to be with someone who may not even exist. You may not even meet them in this lifetime, either…”

“THAT’S NOT TRUE!” Azul pushed her away, anger bubbling up as his tentacles writhed in anger, his vision becoming blurry as ink spilled down his face as he snapped at his mother and guardian, “HOW DARE YOU!? You DON’T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT the CONNECTION BETWEEN SOULMATES! THEY FEEL AS I FEEL! THAT CONNECTION IS WHAT MAKES US UNIQUE!! An UNBREAKABLE BOND that CAN NEVER BE SEVERED!! And how DARE you CHEAT on your OWN SOULMATE!”

“Azul! Now wait a minute!” his mother raised her voice, “I’ve been around the bend a few more times than you have and know about these sorts of things. I WILL NOT ALLOW this behavior to continue in my house!”

“Fine! Then I’ll leave!”

“Azul! Where are you going?! Azul!!”

But the little cecaelia was gone, swimming as fast as he could away from his mother’s typically loving embrace.

‘How could she?!’ he mind was running as he sped up to get further and further away from his home, ‘How could she say that? Why momma… why?!’

He was sniffing hard when he arrived at his hidden octopot, big ugly fat tears of black rolling down his chubby cheeks while mucus dribbled down his nose, running into his open mouth as he gasped out big grotesque sobs. He pulled himself along enough to climb into the pot, his appendages pulling him into the confined space as comfort slowly surrounded his shaking form. One tentacle came forward, wiping at the tears in his eyes as Azul allowed his hearts to calm down.

He wrapped his arms around himself as he looked out into the darkness of the Coral Sea; the pale moonlight reflected off the caverns that surround Azul’s hiding spot, the water growing colder and colder with each passing hour as several sea creatures passed over - not that Azul noticed though. Normally, he would have been interested in what creatures came out at night - but the words his mother spoke forced a jolt of pain on all three of his hearts.

“You can’t fixate on a single being that you hope to encounter at some point in your life,” her words echoed in his mind over and over, “Finding that so-called ‘other half’ is like - well - like the story of the mermaid princess and her longing to be with a human. It’s a rare occurrence that only happens once in a millennium if not longer. Anyone can be happy with or without their soulmate, Azul. There’s no reason you should go to such lengths to be with someone who may not even exist…”

‘What if she’s right?’ he thought, his tentacles tightening around his body, ‘What if I never find them? What if they think the same way she does? What if… what if they’ve already been taken from me?!’

His eyes narrowed as a darkness slowly filled them, glaring out into the cruel twisted world from the darkness of his octopot. No, even if his soulmate was already claimed he would’ve known - he would know if they were, he’d felt it; the tangling of another soul within his if his other half were to be mated to another without his consent. However, that hadn’t happened yet.

…for now.

Azul curled deeper into himself, his thoughts growing darker and darker as he made plans to continue his search for his other half; his beloved soulmate. He wouldn’t give up the search, even if he died trying. He wanted to see them; see what they looked like and to hear their sweet voice, to feel a sense of belonging… to protect what was rightfully his.

***

I'd never imagined before that the world could be turned on its head

I'd never have thought to be here in this place

I'd never have dreamt that in love I'd be lost and so easily led

I guess I was caught by that hint of a smile on her face

***

“Azul-chan, are we almost finished here?” a figure on the cecaelian’s left muttered, “I’m bored.”

“Floyd,” the figure on Azul’s right spoke up, murmuring and pressing a finger to his lips, “There are still some students that need to be housed. Just be a little bit more patient.”

“Speaking of which,” Azul eyed the two carefully, “Any news from our sources, Jade?”

“It’s rather difficult to track down something when we ourselves don’t know what we’re looking for,” the second figure - Jade - answered softly, “A description usually helps in these circumstances, Azul.”

“Perhaps,” the cecaelian shrugged indifferently, “however, it’s hard to pinpoint exactly what I’m looking for, myself.”

The two second-in-commands looked at each other, confusion crossing their features.

Ten years had passed slowly since that terrible day when Azul’s mother planted the first seeds of doubt into her son’s head, her chiding and the doubts never leaving him completely. However, that did not stop him from continuing his search for his other half - exhausting himself beyond belief. By the time Azul was twelve - nearly five years following his discovery of the existence of soulmates - he had searched every crevice of the Coral Sea with no luck; it was also around this time that he met the Leech twins - Floyd and Jade.

Jade was the oldest of the two by a few minutes and was very resourceful as well as very soft-spoke and courteous; his younger brother, Floyd, on the other hand was unpredictable due to his mood swings - he could be interested in one thing one minute and grow bored of it the next. The two moray mers had come across Azul during his younger days when they were in the same class together, watching with awe as his eight appendages hovered about his hidden grotto, writing inscriptions on shells and flipping through pages of grimoires. Originally, they weren’t sure what to make of him, but now that they knew about his capabilities from stories they heard about someone granting wishes for a price - the two were now invested in keeping Azul close to their sides.

And vice versa.

Eventually, the question of why he was doing it came up; Azul took the time to explain the story about how he had first learned about soulmates and how he had been searching the past five years for his, eventually coming to the conclusion that his other half was nowhere in the Coral Sea.

“I have searched every nook and cranny of these waters and have yet to find them,” Azul explained, pouring ingredients into a cauldron as he spoke, “Thus, I’m ‘using my resources’ to spread out the search for my other half.”

“So, some of your deals include gathering any information about a particular person whom you’ve never met nor spoken to?” Jade asked, very intrigued by Azul’s train of thought.

“Hah… sound boring,” Floyd chimed in, reclining atop of one of the rocks in the grotto.

“It’s more interesting than it sounds,” Azul answered, popping a cork off a bottle and dumping the contents into the cauldron as the liquid turned from pale pink to eerie green, “besides, the sooner I find them, the better off they’ll be. However, the problem here lies that if they’re not in the Coral Sea - then where are they?”

Neither of the twins could supply an answer.

It was also around this time that Azul’s appearance had also changed. Baby fat melted and hardened into muscle while his gut and belly dissolved into toned skin, chubby cheeks evolved into high cheekbones; his face sharpening into arched brows, thin lips, and a pointed nose - though his eyes, now filled with knowledge and pride, remained the same. Gone was - in Azul’s opinion - the fat crying octo-twerp of his youth as a handsome, defined sea witch stood in his place; a perfect figure that his soulmate would be proud of once they set sights on him.

The dramatic weight-loss and muscle built scared, not only Jade and Floyd, but also his own mother - whom he did speak to on seldom occasions due to her connections as the owner of the Atlantica Grotto Bistro, which was slowly becoming a local hot spot and where Azul worked full time as a waiter and assistant manager. It was also where he would lure unsuspecting victims - mainly those from his youth or clients with means - into signing his newly-perfected golden contracts, sealing their powers away for his own in exchange for whatever it was that they wished for. Of course, Azul’s mother never suspected a thing about her son’s side business - now a bit preoccupied with the courtship of an older squid mer who had slowly made a presence in her life as well as teaching Azul the fundamentals of building his own business.

When Azul, Jade, and Floyd reached the age of sixteen, they were invited to attend Night Raven College - a boys’ prestigious school for young mages. Azul’s mother had been proud of Azul’s accomplishment and Azul, himself, was secretly thankful that he would be given the chance to explore a different world versus hearing things through the grape vines from his sources. It was during his first year of attending that he made a name for himself, following practically in his mother’s and the Sea Witch’s footsteps; he was now the headwarden and the owner of the Mostro Lounge that his dorm - Octavinelle - operated on the school property. He also was the student others went to when they needed help or had a wish that only he could grant. Jade and Floyd both helped as well, taking his place into luring potential clients into his clutches.

Now, the three of them were entering their second year at NRC - and Azul was barely hanging on by a thread. For the past year on land - thanks to the potion he created that would allow himself, Jade, and Floyd to attend the school as humans - Azul had used his network of informants to extend his search for his other half.

He never forgot the promise he made to continue his search for his soulmate - the contracts were just a starting point to his grand scheme for searching for the person who would love and cherish him as no other could. By building a name for himself, Azul essentially had been given enough money to spend as much as he pleased for information about any leads and his extensive network of informants were at his beck-and-call should he need them to snoop out any potential tips he heard. He had cleared out both Harveston during winter break the previous year and the Queendom of Roses as well as the Shaftlands the previous summer before he was summoned to return to Night Raven. Sunset Savanna would be next on his list during the winter break this year and he would attempt Briar Valley over the summer.

But even that wasn't soon enough it seemed.

Azul’s spirit was practically crying out with each failed search, lead, and tip - nearly to the point that his soul was exhausted and he found himself hearing his mother’s chiding words in his inner ear again. But he was stubborn - incredibly so; and he made plans before leaving his home city again to extend any knowledge to him from outside the school’s barriers.

Azul sighed as the last first year was placed into their dorm, forcing a smile as he addressed his new students, crossing his arms over his chest, "New students! I congratulate you on your achievement. As the dorm head of Octavinelle, I am honored to have the opportunity to support you in what I hope will be a fulfilling campus experience.”

"Hey, does anyone know where the headmage went?" Azul arched his brow as the dorm head of Pomefiore, Vil Schoenheit, spoke, “He disappeared midway through the ceremony…”

"Some headmage he is," Idia Shroud, the head of Ignihyde, grumbled from his tablet that hovered in the chamber.

"Maybe he had a tummy ache?" the ever naive dorm head of Scarabia - Kalim Al-Asim - asked with a shrug.

The doors burst open as the head mage himself appeared, shouting, "I most certainly did not!"

"Ah, speak of the devil," Riddle Rosehearts, the dorm head of Heartslabyul, grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest.

"If you must know," the headmage continued, pulling a cloaked figure along with him, their slender wrist tight in his grasp, "I was searching for the new student who failed to show for orientation. Come along, you are the only one who hasn't been assigned to a dorm - step up to the dark mirror and be quick about it. I'll hold onto your weasel."

Azul watched as the headmage pulled the figure along, causing them to stumble slightly, before he released them. The cloaked figure lifted their head, taking a tentative step towards the mirror as the headmage held tightly onto another being - a little gray cat creature with burning fire in his ears with eyes wider than saucer plates. Something about the shy figure had drawn Azul utmost attention as they stood before the dark mirror.

“State your name,” the mirror spoke, its voice deep and dark.

“I’m (Y/N),” you spoke, so quiet that everyone had to strain to hear them.

“(Y/N)... The nature of your soul is…” the dark mirror hesitated, narrowing its pitch-black eyes before announcing, “...unclear to me.”

“What did you just say?” the headmage crossed his arms over his chest as a murmur rippled through the crowd.

“I sense no magical power from this one,” the dark mirror answered, voice grim, “Soundless. Colorless. Shapeless. Utterly vacant… Therefore, no dorm would be appropriate.”

With his final answer, the headmage let out a cry, “Are you suggesting the black carriage went to recieve a person who cannot even use magic?! That is absurd! The student selection process has not erred once in its century of existence!”

As head headmage continued to squawk in surprise, Azul nearly felt his heart stop in his chest when you looked in his direction.

As soon as your eyes locked with his, Azul knew.

His soulmate was here.

You were a pretty (h/c) with tints of (f/c) weaved into locks that framed your soft features hidden under the black and gold hood of the ceremonial robe you wore, the exotic eyes of (e/c) filled with wonder and surprise - with an underlying hint of fear, likely due to the shock of being called ‘abnormal’ by a piece of looking-glass. You looked about a few inches shorter than him - a perfect height for him to rest his chin upon your head - as a pleasant pink painted your cheeks, turning them into red delicious apples that tempted Azul to take a bite, and your jaw dropped slightly, lips parting with surprise.

Azul knew that you could feel the strong connection between your two souls - the pull he had searched the past decade for finally presenting itself in the shape of you. He found himself unable to look away, staring at you with quiet longing and lovestruck clearly written across his features.

“Azul?” Jade snickered, “What is-”

“I think octy just found what he was lookin’ for, Jade,” Floyd snickered, his eyes shifting between the startled first-year and their lovestruck boss.

“I quite agree,” Jade’s voice came out sickly smooth as his eyes shifted between the three of them, “this has just gotten interesting…”

Azul hardly noticed though the twins’ snickers in his ears, his thoughts were already running wild with ideas of how he wanted to spoil you - his found other half, his precious mate.

The problem now was that you were a non-magic user and a female to boot - nevermind that you had just been put on display like an exotic animal. The whispers that echoed in the chamber forced you to look away from the lovestruck second-year, your body quivering with fear and unease as he himself was brought back to reality.

‘How DARE they insult her while in my presence?’ Azul felt a growl bubble up in the back of his throat, his pale blues shifting from the crowd to his mate to the headmage and back again as his hands curled into fists under the sleeves of his cloak, ‘And how DARE the dark mirror put (Y/N) in this situation!’

“Headwardens,” the headmage’s voice echoed in the chamber, silencing every whisper as he took control of the situation, “please escort your students back to the dorms as the orientation is now complete.”

“What about (Y/N)?” the voice of Coach Vargas spoke up, “Surely you are not expecting someone like her to remain here?”

‘And you’re first on the list of people who will suffer my wrath for saying something so hostile to my mate,’ Azul thought, thinking of what the best way would be to attack the coach indirectly.

“This is a most unfortunate turn of events, yes,” the headmage agreed, tapping his chin in thought, “Due to you being female and that you are a non-magic user, I’m afraid I cannot allow you to attend Night Raven College. You seem like an amicable young lady, however this is an all-boy’s school and I cannot admit a student - male or female - with no magical ability. But fear not, the dark mirror will see you safely home.”

‘NO! You CAN’T!’ Azul was barely holding himself together at this point - he had just found his soulmate and now the world wanted the two of them to be separated forever?! He would not allow it!

Before he could act on impulse, the mirror’s deep voice echoed in the chamber, “There is no such place.”

“What?!” Crowley squawked again as murmurs rose from the crowd yet again.

“There is no place in this world where this soul belongs,” the dark mirror answered again, “None.”

“H-How can that be?!” Crowley asked, his hands shaking with an inner rage, “My, but today is a veritable cavalcade of impossible phenomena! This has never happened throughout my long tenure. I must confess I am at something of a loss.”

Azul could sense the sadness radiating from his mate as well. Were you disappointed that you couldn’t return from wherever you had come from? And if so, why would you want to go back if now you knew of his existence?

Perhaps a little persuasion was needed…

Azul smiled darkly, before taking a step forward, clearing his throat, “Headmage Crowley, I understand that all of us are at a loss of what to do with our strange guest - however, may I offer a solution to our little problem?”

“Master Ashengrotto,” Headmage Crowley crossed his arms over his chest, “I’m not certain what you mean. We must send (Y/N) back to where they came from.”

“And how do you propose we do that?” Azul countered, shrugging while keeping his eyes trained on the headmage while he faked a painful look, “It is easy to return us to our homes, but we have no idea where she comes from - or if we can even get her back.”

“T-There must be a way though… right?” you spoke up, your eyes pleading with Azul’s.

“I hate to agree with Azul, but he’s right,” a tan-skinned, dark-haired figure spoke up, “If this herbivore is from another world entirely, the chances of getting them back are slim to none.”

“Leona is quite right on the money with that one,” Vil answered with a nod.

Azul smiled, knowing that the ripples of shock and disbelief were now falling onto the headmage for being incompetent in dealing with this matter. He couldn’t turn (Y/N) away now that Azul had spoken up with two additional dorm heads also taking his side.

“What do you propose then?” Headmage Crowley asked, eyeing the headwarden of Octavinelle uneasily.

“Octavinelle, as I’m sure you remember, has plenty of rooms for rent,” Azul answered, turning to (Y/N) with a reassuring smile, “As the dorm head, I will gladly take (Y/N) into my dorm where she can stay during her time here. If she’s agreeable, she can work within the Mostro Lounge to pay for a place to sleep and to have food in her belly.”

“I’m not sure, Master Ashengrotto…” Crowley spoke, rubbing his chin with a clawed gloved hand, “a single woman in a dorm filled with boys is highly improper…”

“Improper would be the term used for the predicament your so-called black carriage put you in,” Azul snipped, his eyes flashing dangerously at the headmage, “Besides - the rooms we rent are on the opposite side of the aquarium in our dorm, quite a ways away from the rooms the dorm members reside in for that particular purpose. We also have security within our dorm and I’m usually the one to deal with matters of… problematic nature.”

“Perhaps, however-”

“Consider it one less problem on your plate as well. If (Y/N) is brought to my dorm, I will take full responsibility for her - and I might be able to find a way to get her home in the process as well.”

“You what?” your eyes widen with hope, your hand reaching out and clasping the edge of his robe.

“I have an endless network of resources at my disposal, my dear - I can likely find you a quicker way to get home than you can with anyone else here,” Azul answered confidently, thinking, ‘Though you won’t know that since I found you. I’ve searched high and low for you, I’ll be damned if I let you slip from my grasp so easily.’

“Very well then,” Headmage Crowley let out a sigh, “(Y/N), are you agreeable with staying with the Octavinelle dorm and working at the Mostro Lounge until Master Ashengrotto can find a way to return you to your world?”

“Of course! Thank you so much, Mr. Ashengrotto!” you beamed with joy.

“Azul,” the dorm head answered with a nod, “please, call me Azul.”

“Azul, then.”

The human-cecaelian smiled sweetly at his soulmate and offered an arm out, his hearts practically bursting with joy when you slipped your own arm through his - the two of you now link together via soul and side by side.

***

Azul brought you to the Octavinelle’s renting dorm after ordering Jade and Floyd to start the welcoming party for the first years as well as to get them ready for tomorrow night.

“Do what you need to do,” Azul smiled at the two.

“Of course.”

“You got it, boss!”

When the two of them were out of earshot, you looked up at Azul, “Thank you so much for your help back there. I wasn’t certain what was going to happen if you hadn’t stepped in.”

“Likely the headmage would have thrown you out of the college and left you to fend for yourself,” Azul smiled, “but I, on the other hand, would never allow something so pitifully disgusting happen to you.”

You giggled, the sound pulling on Azul’s heartstrings.

‘She’s here, she’s real,’ his thoughts quickened as the two continued their leisurely pace, ‘I knew that she was real, that she and I would meet. It will only be a matter of time now - once she confesses her feelings for me, I will make her mine.’

The two stopped outside one of the doors, Azul pulled out a key ring and unlocked it before ushering his soulmate inside.

“You can stay here,” Azul answered, peering around and wishing that it was cleaner than it was now, “There’s spare blankets in the closet in case you get cold during the night and fresh towels in the bathroom. I’ll have Jade or Floyd bring you a spare pair of clothing since you’ve brought nothing with you.”

“Oh, you don’t have to…”

“I insist,” Azul answered, “What sort of host would I be if I didn’t provide the best service?”

You giggled again, your smile even wider, “Well, thank you again Azul.”

Each time you spoke his name, Azul’s heart gave a leap of joy.

He coughed, blushing slightly, “W-Well then, should you need anything during your time here, just let me know.”

“Of course, but - may I ask a question?”

“You already have,” Azul snickered at you.

Your pout was adorable that Azul burst into laughter before you asked, “Why were you willing to help me? A complete stranger?”

“I have a gift for sensing someone in need,” Azul answered, his grin spreading wider over his features, “I have helped many poor unfortunate souls in my short lifetime and intend on continuing to offer my services in exchange for something.”

“What sort of payment?”

“Depends - but it isn’t something you should worry about. I like to keep a few things in my personal life private - regardless of my relationships with other people.”

“Of course, I can respect that.”

“Thank you, I appreciate it,” Azul reached out, pushing the hood down and stroking your soft hair gently, “Why don’t you rest now? I have to attend the welcome party for the new students and make sure no one is destroying anything in my absence. I will have Jade or Floyd bring you something to eat in a little bit along with that fresh change of clothes. Tomorrow, we’ll discuss our contract.”

“Contract?”

“I always have my employees sign a business contract before they begin work - regardless how long they work in the lounge for,” Azul answered, “It helps to have things in writing when dealing with problems later down the road.”

With a nod, you grinned, “Thank you again, Azul-san.”

The cecaelia couldn’t help himself as he leaned forward, pressing a kiss to your forehead before pulling away and leaving his other half to stare at him in shock and surprise.

When the door clicked behind him, Azul pulled the keyring out and locked the door to prevent anyone from entering and you from leaving. His eyes gleamed menacingly in the low light as a black gloved hand stroked the doorframe gently.

‘At last… you’re here with me, my precious pearl. Forgive me, but now that I have seen you… I can never let you go…’

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natashasfilms · 1 year

Text

To Be Together Again

Summary: After your divorce, you still find yourself hopelessly in love with Steve, despite the challenges and complexities of co-parenting your daughter together. As you try to move on, your daughter has a plan of her own to reunite you and Steve, making you question if second chances at love really are possible.

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Fem!Reader

Warnings: fluff, angst, language, no use of y/n, no use of daughter’s name, exes to lovers, divorced parents, not really unrequited love, second chance romance, insecurity, making out, implied smut, happy ending

Word Count: 5,394

Note: I know it’s been a while since I’ve posted anything but I have a bit of free time so I’ve decided to write an angsty but fluffy one shot! Hope you enjoy! (Also I have nothing against blondes, I just wanted to add a little humor into it!)

Stranger Things Masterlist

You stepped out of your car and took a deep breath, trying to steady your nerves. It was always nerve-wracking to see Steve, the father of your daughter, even though you shared custody. You had missed him terribly since your divorce a year ago, but you tried not to let it show.

You were meeting Steve at a local park to drop off your daughter, and as you approached, you saw him standing by the swings. He looked just as handsome as ever, with his thick hair and brown eyes. You couldn't help but feel a pang of longing as you looked at him.

“Hey.” He said, his voice warm and familiar. “How are you doing?”

You smiled weakly. “I’m good. How about you?”

“I’m good.” He replied, his eyes drifting to your daughter as she ran up to him. “Hey, sweetie! How was your weekend with Mom?”

As Steve greeted your daughter, you stepped back and watched them, feeling a sense of bittersweet sadness wash over you. This was the life you had always wanted, but it was slipping through your fingers.

You cleared your throat, getting ready to leave. “Well, I’ll see you both later.” You said, smiling. “I love you, honey.”

Your daughter frowned, hating that you had to leave. “Can’t you stay for a little bit? The three of us haven’t been together in so long.” She whined, causing your heart to clench.

You hesitated, feeling the weight of your daughter's words. As you looked up, you met Steve’s gaze. He seemed to understand your hesitation, and after a few moments of silence, he spoke up. “Yeah, she’s right. It’s been a while since the three of us have spent time together. Why don’t you stick around for a little bit?”

You nodded, feeling grateful for the invitation. “Sure, I can stay for a bit.”

You watched as your daughter ran off to play on the swings, and Steve turned to you. “Are you coming to Robin’s party this weekend?”

You nodded. “Yeah, I’m planning on it. It’ll be good to see everyone.”

Steve shifted on his feet, and you could tell there was something he wanted to say. “Actually, there’s something I wanted to mention. I’ve been seeing someone, and I was thinking about bringing her to the party.”

Your heart sank at his words, and you tried to hide the hurt in your expression. You had no place to feel upset. It had been a year since you split and it had been a year since either of you dated anyone. “Oh, okay. That’s fine. I don’t mind.”

Some time between your exchange, your daughter popped up again. You could feel your daughter’s eyes on you, and you knew you needed to keep it together for her sake. “I should probably go now, but it was good seeing you. Take care.”

You hugged your daughter and gave Steve a brief nod before turning to leave. As you walked away, you couldn't help but feel a sense of sadness wash over you. It was clear that Steve had moved on, but you still weren’t ready to do the same.

You were not ready for this weekend.

You stand in front of the mirror, taking one last look at your reflection. Your hair falls in soft waves around your face, your makeup is impeccable, and your dress hugs your curves in all the right places. You look beautiful, confident, and ready to face the world.

But the world you’re about to face is one that fills you with anxiety and dread. You’re going to Robin's party tonight, and you know that Steve will be there with his new girlfriend. The thought of seeing them together fills you with a sense of unease, but you know that you can't hide away forever.

You take a deep breath and step out of your room, making your way down the stairs and out the door. As you make your way to Robin's house, your mind is filled with thoughts of what you’ll say to Steve, how you'll react when you see him with his new girlfriend, and whether you'll be able to keep your emotions in check.

When you arrive at the party, you take a deep breath and steel yourself for what’s to come. You spot Steve across the room, laughing and chatting with a group of people, and your heart sinks a little. He looks happy, carefree, and completely oblivious to your presence. You also see a pretty girl next to him.

Suddenly, you feel someone wrap their arms around you, squeezing you tight. “You look stunning! Absolutely gorgeous!” Robin exclaimed, taking a good look at you. “You are so hot.”

You giggled, feeling shy. “Look at you! You look beautiful!”

Robin waved a hand. She looked back to where your gaze was a few moments ago, rolling her eyes. “I don’t like her.”

Your furrowed your brows. “What? You just met her.”

She shook her head. “She acted as if I would steal Steve from her when I welcomed them into my house. MY house!”

“What did she do?” You were intrigued to know what Steve’s new girl was like, as you weren’t up to meeting her yourself.

“Okay, so, I opened the door and greeted them like I would normally with all of my guests,” Robin started, guiding you to the kitchen where you saw Nancy and Jonathan. You greeted each other as you listened to Robin’s story. “I hugged Steve first, because, you know, I’m not just going to hug a random stranger!”

“Is she telling you about how much she hates Steve’s new girlfriend?” Nancy teases, causing Jonathan to laugh.

“Apparently,” you giggled.

“I’m just telling you guys how I’ve been mistreated in my own house! Now shush!” The three of you shut up, letting Robin continue. “She kept clinging onto Steve’s arm as if I would steal him away from her or something, like I’m not lesbian or whatever. Not that anyone’s supposed to know but, come on!”

You squint your eyes, waiting for her to get to the part why she hates her so much already. In the meantime, you grabbed some juice as you didn’t drink alcohol.

“I started to welcome her but she gave me this death glare that Steve didn’t apparently notice and I swear, if I could, I would’ve slapped her right then and there. I led them inside my house, showing the girl around, but she barely spoke two words to me, and just dragged Steve by her side the entire time.” Robin huffed. “After I had shown her around, I tried giving her a warm hug but she recoiled and shrugged me off as if I’m some sort of disease!”

Jonathan raised an eyebrow, sipping on his drink before he spoke. “I don’t like her either. Gives me one of those ‘mean girl’ vibes.”

“Thank you! And she’s blonde!” Robin exclaimed.

Nancy tilted her head. “Aren’t you blonde?”

Robin gasped, putting a hand over her heart. “I am a brunette, thank you very much.”

“Huh,” you hummed, sipping on your juice, causing Robin to glare at you.

“Why don’t you meet her, hm? I’m sure it would be lovely to have a chat with your ex-husband’s new girlfriend.” Robin shot, putting a hand on her hips.

You grimaced. “Yeah, I’d rather die. My heart can’t take all that pain.”

Robin sighed. “Guess Steve’s out of our quintet. He’s kicked out until he leaves that blondie.”

Nancy shrugged. “Maybe we should get to know her better. She could be nervous.”

“Has my judgment ever failed you, Nance?” Robin questioned, raising an eyebrow.

Jonathan cleared his throat, catching everyone's attention. “Looks like we’ve got company headed our way.” He said, nodding in the direction of Steve and the woman beside him.

Your heart sank as they drew closer. You took a deep breath and tried to keep your cool, taking a sip of your drink to hide your nerves. Robin looked away, clearly uninterested, while Nancy and Jonathan put on tight-lipped smiles that didn't quite reach their eyes.

As Steve approached, he greeted the group and introduced the woman at his side. “Hey guys, this is Mia.” He said, and all eyes turned to her.

She gave a strained smile, and you couldn't help but think that you weren't the only one feeling uncomfortable. The tension was palpable as you all stood there, unsure of what to say.

After a few excruciatingly awkward moments, you decided to take the lead and introduced yourself, holding out your hand. “Nice to meet you.” You said, trying to be friendly.

Mia reluctantly shook your hand, and her next words caught you off guard. “Oh, you're... her mom.” She said, her tone implying that she knew exactly who you were talking about, but didn't want to say your daughter’s name.

You raised an eyebrow, surprised. “Have we met before?” You asked, looking for an explanation.

Mia raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, your daughter,” she said, her tone insincere. “She talks a lot about you.”

Your eyes shot to Steve who seemed to shift under your gaze. “You’ve met my daughter?”

Steve began to speak to clear any confusion. “Mia came over and met her, that’s all.”

You nodded your head stiffly, but the tension in your body did not disappear. You couldn’t help but feel a strong resentment for the fact that Steve’s girlfriend had met your daughter without you knowing.

Nancy, Jonathan, and Robin stared back and forth between you three. Robin let out a big breath to divert the attention elsewhere. “Well, I hope you’re enjoying the party but the four of us have very important matters that we need to focus on, so…” She gulped down her drink that she got in the midst of the very uncomfortable exchange before setting it back down onto the counter. “Have fun.”

Without another word, Robin dragged you, Nancy, and Jonathan away, and the tension in the air dissipated as she led you to another room. You let out a breath you didn't realize you were holding, feeling a mix of anger and relief. Mia may have been beautiful, but her attitude left much to be desired.

“See what I mean?” Robin threw her hands up. “She met your daughter without Steve even notifying you first! I thought you guys talked about that?”

You sighed, your eyes shifting to the ground. “I thought so too but I guess he didn’t seem to listen.”

Nancy placed a hand on your shoulder, offering you some comfort. “Don’t worry about it. Steve can be clueless sometimes.”

Jonathan nodded in agreement. “Yeah, he probably didn’t think it was a big deal.”

“It is a big deal,” you spoke, looking up to meet their gazes. “She’s my daughter and I should have known if she was meeting someone that Steve is seeing.”

Robin patted your back. “We know, we know. That’s why we’re here for you.”

You smiled gratefully at them, feeling a sense of relief that you had such good friends to lean on. “Thanks, guys. I really appreciate it.”

As the night wore on, you tried to lose yourself in the music and conversation, but it seemed that Steve was always in your peripheral vision. Every time you turned around, there he was, watching you with those brown eyes. Even worse, he seemed to be completely oblivious to Mia’s chatter, his focus solely on you.

You couldn’t help but feel a mix of emotions: anger, confusion, and a little bit of hope. Maybe, just maybe, he was regretting his decision to move on from you. But as much as you longed for him, you knew that he was with Mia now, and that you needed to move on.

Desperate for some space and fresh air, you excused yourself and made your way to the bathroom. Once inside, you leaned against the sink and stared at your reflection. You took a deep breath and splashed some water on your face, trying to shake off the memories and emotions that threatened to overwhelm you. You couldn't keep doing this, torturing yourself with what-ifs and maybes. It was time to accept that Steve had moved on, and you needed to do the same.

Even though your daughter wanted both of you together again, and no matter how much you wished to have him back, Steve didn’t want you. It had been a year and it was time you finally moved on.

As you turned off the faucet, the door creaked open, and Steve appeared in the doorway, his eyes widening in surprise. “Oh, sorry. I didn’t realize anyone was in here.” He said, his voice apologetic.

You gave him some space to enter but he hesitated, not wanting to make you uncomfortable. With a small smile, you reassured him. “No, it’s fine. You can come in.”

He walked in, closing the door behind him and leaned against the sink, taking a deep breath. You began to fix your hair and felt his eyes on you. “I, um, I’m sorry.” He said, breaking the silence. Confused, you turned to look at him. “About Mia. I know we talked about it, but she just came over on her own and then—”

You closed your eyes, feeling a stinging in the back of your eyes. “Don’t worry about it, Steve. I understand.” You said, trying to keep your voice steady. He pursed his lips and nodded his head, but his eyes didn’t stray away. “Mia seems…nice.”

Steve laughed, throwing his head back. “Don’t lie. You hated her. All of you did.”

You couldn’t help but laugh, breaking the tension in the room. “We did! Robin couldn't stand her!” You said, recalling how your friend had voiced her dislike for Mia.

The two of you fell into a pit of laughter, holding onto the edge of the sink. “I can’t believe you’re with her!” You said between giggles.

“Me either, I’ve only been seeing her for a few days but she's been driving me insane! Even our little girl doesn't like her.” Steve exclaimed, clutching his stomach as the laughter between you both started to slow down.

You felt a little better after that, knowing that Steve knew how you all felt about Mia. You finally managed to stop laughing and looked up at Steve, finding his eyes already set on you.

“I think tonight may have been the last straw after I saw the way she treated all of you. I broke things off with her.” He said, his voice soft.

Your eyes widened in shock and your lips parted. “What?”

The two of you had moved closer in the midst of your laughing fit, and you could feel his body close to yours, almost pressing against you. Your eyes locked onto his, and you felt your heart racing. “I didn’t like the way she talked to all of you, especially with you, so...” He trailed off, his hands hovering near yours.

You could feel his breath on your skin, and you felt a flutter in your stomach. “Oh,” you said, your voice barely a whisper. Suddenly, you jerked, pulling away. “Right, um, it’s late, so I think I’m going to head out.”

Steve looked disappointed as you turned around and opened the door. He followed you out, and both of you jumped when you saw Robin standing there, an eyebrow raised in surprise.

“Your babysitter called...” Robin began, her eyes moving between you both as the blood rushed to your cheeks. “The little one fell and hurt herself and now she keeps crying for you both.”

Worry flooded your mind, and you looked at Steve, who mirrored your concern. You thanked Robin and left without saying any goodbyes, your mind solely focused on your daughter.

As you were about to enter your car, Steve grabbed your hand. “Just come with me. It'll save more time.”

You nodded and followed him to his car. As you sat in the passenger seat, another thought popped into your head. “What about Mia?”

Steve shook his head. “She got angry and went off with some dude after I split with her.”

You looked out the window as Steve drove, your mind solely on your daughter. Of course she’s been hurt many times in the past but she has never cried for you both after. She would usually put a bandage on the cut and then shrug it off, going back to her playful self. This was unlike her and you needed to see her as soon as possible.

After you and Steve arrived at his house, you quickly comforted your daughter who was sobbing uncontrollably. She didn’t explain why she was crying. She had only hurt her knee while playing and skinned it but nothing too bad. You were confused as to why she couldn’t stop but soon after, she fell asleep in your arms.

The babysitter explained what had happened, then left after you thanked her. You kissed your sleeping daughter’s forehead, rocking her back and forth. Steve stood in front of you, running a hand through his hair. “Let’s get her to bed.”

You nodded your head and gently stood up, carrying her in your arms. You slowly walked upstairs as Steve went to the kitchen to grab a glass of water. You walked into your daughter’s room in Steve’s house and sat on the bed, lifting the covers to lay her down underneath it.

As you gently tuck your daughter into bed, her eyes flutter open, looking up at you with her tired eyes and asks, “Mom, can I ask you a question?”

You smile, already feeling your heart melt at the sound of her voice. “Of course, honey. What’s on your mind?”

After a moment's hesitation, she asks, “Do you still love Dad?” The question catches you off guard, and you feel your breath catch in your throat. You take a deep breath and look at your daughter, trying to find the right words to explain the complicated feelings you still have for your ex-husband.

“We… we love each other, but things got really hard between us,” you say slowly, careful not to give away too much. “But we're still a family, and we'll always be there for you.”

Your daughter nods thoughtfully, but you can see that she's not satisfied with your answer. “But do you love him like you used to?” She presses.

Your heart aches as memories flood back to you - the good times, the laughter, the love you shared with Steve. You swallow hard and take a deep breath before admitting, “Yes, I do still love him.”

“What does dad mean to you?” Your daughter asked again, pushing you for an answer.

You took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. “Dad means a lot to me, honey. He’s the father of my child, my best friend, and...” you hesitated for a moment. “He’s the love of my life.”

Your daughter’s eyes widened, taking in your words. “Really?”

You nodded, feeling a lump form in your throat. “Really.”

Unbeknownst to you, Steve had been standing outside the door the entire time, listening to your conversation. As your words wash over him, he feels a rush of emotion - regret, love, and hope all mingled together. He knows he messed up and hurt you, but he also knows that he still loves you and can't imagine living without you.

Your daughter quickly fell asleep after that, a smile evident on her face. Your lips turned up, cradling her small face in your hands. You finally stood up and began to walk out of the room, closing the door behind you, when you noticed Steve standing outside.

Your breath hitched and you desperately hoped he hadn’t heard anything you said. You cleared your throat and crossed your arms against your chest, Steve’s eyes immediately falling onto them. You felt the warmth in your cheeks and quickly uncrossed them. “She’s asleep.”

He nodded his, his eyes stuck on you. You stood there in silence, for what felt like hours, until you finally spoke that you had to leave. “Thanks for driving me here and–”

Realization hit you that your car was still at Robin’s. “Your car is still at Rob’s.” Steve answered for you, reading your mind.

You sighed, chuckling. “Yeah…”

“Just stay here for the night, okay? I’ll drop you off in the morning to pick up your car.” Steve told you, his voice laced with softness.

You were hesitant but agreed, not wanting your daughter to be home alone while Steve dropped you off. “Okay, yeah. I’ll stay.”

Steve grinned, causing you to smile. You two still stood there, staring at each other, not moving an inch. Not until you looked away, trying not to let the warmth in your cheeks take over.

“I’ll take the guest room.” You said softly, beginning to walk away. Before you could take another step, Steve grabbed your wrist, pulling you back.

He put both hands on your arms, making you stand in front of him. Your eyes looked up into his, and you swear you could feel yourself unable to breathe. Steve's gaze was intense and unwavering as he held onto your arms. You felt a shiver run down your spine as you tried to steady your breathing. For a moment, the two of you just stood there, looking at each other in silence. “I didn’t mean to pry but…I couldn’t help but overhear what you just said.”

Your eyes widened in shock and you immediately tried to back away, but his hands on your arms stopped you from moving any further. “Steve, I’m sorry. Can we just forget about that?”

He shook his head and smiled, making your heart skip a beat. “No, I can’t. I can’t just forget what you said when I’ve been feeling the exact same for you for the past year.” He saw the way your face lit up, but the surprise was still written all over your face. He lifted a hand to your cheek, cradling it. “I can’t just forget how you called me the love of your life when you’re the love of my life. I know things got tough for us but our divorce was a mistake. Why do you think it took me a year to finally date someone, but then break it off with them after less than a month?”

You took a deep breath and closed your eyes, feeling his soft hand hold your face. “Steve…” You whispered.

“I will do anything to get you back. It was my fault and we should have done this so much sooner. I was just scared…just afraid that you didn’t feel the same way anymore but when I told you that I was seeing Mia the other day, you looked so hurt, and I’m the reason for that.” He said softly, leaning his forehead against yours. “I have never stopped loving you, okay? I want to fix things. Not just for us, but also for our girl. She deserves to see her parents be happy and in love. I refuse to tiptoe around our feelings any longer. You and I belong together, and we both know that. All of our friends and family know that.”

His confession made your heart swell and nothing could express what you were feeling at this exact moment. You felt so relieved and full of love. You had always dreamed of this moment after your split but never thought it would happen. Until now.

“I love you, Steve,” you whispered, eyes fluttering shut. He brought a hand to your chin, tilting your head up. His lips brushed against yours, and not being able to wait any longer, you crashed your lips onto his.

Steve took in a deep breath as both of his hands cupped the sides of your face, pulling you closer, while your hands went up to wrap behind his neck. As your lips met, you could feel the sparks flying between the two of you. It was like no time had passed since you last kissed. The way his lips moved against yours was familiar and comforting, but at the same time, it felt like a new beginning. You had both grown and changed since your divorce, but the chemistry between you was still undeniable.

You let out a soft moan as Steve deepened the kiss, his tongue gently probing your lips. You parted them, allowing him to explore your mouth as his hands slid down to your waist, pulling you closer to him. His touch was electrifying, and you could feel your body responding to him in a way that it hadn't in a long time.

Steve’s lips moved from your lips to your neck, causing you to gasp at the sensation. His warm breath against your skin sent shivers down your spine, and you couldn't help but lean into his touch. You tilted your head to give him better access, and he took full advantage of it, trailing soft, lingering kisses down the curve of your neck. His lips continued to explore your neck, and you let out a low moan, feeling the heat between the two of you intensify. You were lost in the moment, completely in his embrace, as he left a trail of kisses along your neck, each one sending waves of pleasure through your body.

He pulled away for just a second to look at you, then down to your figure. “This damn dress,” he groaned, his hands lowering down to your bare thighs, just inches away from the hem of your dress. “This dress is making me go feral.”

“Yeah?” You moaned softly, biting your lip. “What does this dress make you want to do?”

He smashed his lips onto yours again, using his arms to pick you up, your legs automatically wrapping around his waist. He began to walk to his room, shutting the door behind him. Your kiss didn’t falter, continuing to move your lips against each other as he gently put you down.

The both of you stood inches from his bed and he began to slowly unzip the back of your dress. “A lot of things, baby. I want to do so many things to you,” he confessed, turning you around so your back pressed against his chest. “But first, I want to take this off of you.”

You let him use his hands to remove your dress. You could feel the throbbing between your legs and all you needed at this moment was Steve. “Stop teasing, Steve,” you said quietly, feeling his lips attach to your neck.

He chuckled, picking his head up to whisper in your ear. “Well, you better stay quiet, baby. Don’t want to wake up the little one, right?”

The next morning, the sun started to peek through Steve’s windows, causing you to wake up. You slowly opened your eyes and felt a pair of arms holding you tight. You turned your head to see Steve next to you, sleeping soundly.

You grinned, feeling content with the world. You raised a hand to gently rub a thumb against his cheek, careful not to wake him up. However, he began to stir in his sleep and his eyes fluttered open, catching your hand in his. “Morning,” he said in his morning voice, something you always found attractive.

“Morning,” you responded softly. He kissed your hand and then let go to bring his hand to your cheek, leaning over to kiss you. He breathed you in, as if he couldn’t believe you were real. He pulled you on top of him, not letting you go as he deepened the kiss. After a few seconds, you pulled away, feeling breathless. You lay your head on his chest, listening to the sound of his heartbeat. “We should probably get up.”

Steve groaned, hugging you tight. “I think we should stay in bed for a few more hours.”

You giggled, pushing your hands against his chest to force yourself off. “And have your daughter pop into your room to see us in bed?”

“She’s going to find out eventually, so I don’t really care.” Steve said, pulling you back against his chest.

You sighed contentedly, snuggling back into his embrace. “I guess you're right,” you said, smiling as you looked up at him. “But let's at least get some breakfast before she wakes up.”

Steve chuckled and pressed a soft kiss to your forehead. “Okay, fine. But I'm not letting you go just yet.” He pulled you close again, his lips finding yours in a slow and tender kiss. His hands roamed over your body, exploring every inch as if he was still trying to convince himself that you were really there with him.

You responded eagerly, your body tingling with desire. As the kiss deepened, Steve rolled you onto your back, hovering over you with a hunger that made your breath catch. He kissed a trail down your neck, his teeth nipping at your sensitive skin as he went. Your fingers tangled in his hair, holding him close as you moaned softly.

For a few moments, the rest of the world faded away and all that mattered was the two of you, tangled up in the sheets and lost in each other's embrace. But eventually, you pulled back, panting for breath. “Steve, we really should get up.” You said, your voice barely above a whisper.

He groaned in frustration but nodded, rolling off of you and pulling you close to his side. “Fine.” He said, pressing a kiss to your temple. “But we're coming back here later.”

After finishing your morning routine, you headed to the kitchen to make breakfast. As you stood at the stove, frying eggs, you felt Steve's arms wrap around your waist, his lips planting soft kisses on your neck. You tried to push him away, but he held you closer, whispering sweet nothings in your ear. “S-Steve.” You said breathlessly. “She’s going to come in here any second.”

He chuckled softly against your skin. “She's been wanting us to get back together, love. Don't worry, she'll be happy to see us like this.”

You rolled your eyes but at the same moment, you heard a small voice behind you. “Mom? Dad?”

The two of you turned around to see your adorable daughter, standing there with her mouth agape. “Hi, honey, did you have a good sleep?” You greeted her, crouching down to give her a big hug.

She walked over to hug you but you and Steve could still see the shock on her face. “Yes, but…” She looked at her dad, Steve giving her a huge grin back as he crouched down next to her.

“What is it, sweetie?” Steve asked her, rubbing her arm.

“I’m confused…” her little voice spoke. “Are you guys back together?”

You and Steve chuckled, looking at each other before looking back at your daughter. “I guess we are.” You told her and you saw her lips turn up into a huge smile.

She started jumping in excitement, clapping her hands. “Yay! It worked! It worked!”

You raised an eyebrow, confused as to what worked. “What worked, honey?”

She looked at both of you and stopped jumping. “My plan to get you both together after your party,” she said, still grinning. “I wanted you two alone together again and it worked!”

Steve arched an eyebrow and lightly pushed your shoulder, causing you to look back at him. He tilted his head, putting an arm around your shoulder. “You’re a smart one, huh? It definitely worked.”

“Does this mean you’ll get married again?” She asked innocently.

You chuckled, kissing her forehead. “We may…”

Steve squeezed your arm, hugging you both. “Yes, we are. I don’t think I’ll be able to live without your mom, sweetie.”

Your daughter let go of you both and started to sing happily, ecstatic that her parents were finally back together again. You leaned your head on Steve’s shoulder, a bright smile on your face as you watched her run around. Steve kissed your forehead, rubbing soothing circles on your arm.

This was all you had wanted. To finally be happy with your perfect family.

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